#most recently though? Eddie Diaz.

[johanna-swann]

Kind of have complex feelings about fandoms jumping to the "they just need a good same-sex smooch" every time a character says they feel "broken" or like there's something "deeply wrong" with them. This feeling that there's something monstrous inside you that can never be fixed? Most likely doesn't come from being queer or at least not just from being queer. More likely it's mental illness. There is a significant overlap, we already know that, but healthy minds usually don't go there, queer or not.

Maybe it's just my personal experience as a bi and grey-aroace queer with severe depression and anxiety, but I've had that feeling. I still have that feeling sometimes and my sexuality has nothing to do with it and never did. So I'm attracted to more than one gender. So I'm attracted to others in a way that's different from how allo people feel. Big deal (not).

Idk, it just feels weird (disrespectful) that when a character who shows obvious signs of mental illness and no signs of being queer gets a bunch of "he needs to get dicked down good" statements instead of real sympathy. Even after the actors have said that their own experiences with mental illness played into their work and after it's been said by the people working on the show that the character in question is straight. Like. Internalised queerphobia sucks, yeah, but can tumblr please learn that not everything is about being gay.

[thosetwofirefighters]

find the word challenge

rules: share snippets of your work containing each of the words the previous poster selected for you (optional addition: if you can't find the word in your WIPs, or you simply don't have any WIPs, you can just write a sentence around the word)

thanks @the-likesofus for the tag!! very excited to see how many of these words I've used...

my words are: quiet, hold, cover, first, together, and small. unsurprisingly, my fake dating au (currently sitting at almost 30k words like it has been for the past few months...) has all of these words multiple times lol <3

quiet

Buck’s phone rings, and he pulls it out of his pocket, his hands shaking when he reads Bobby’s contact name. He answers before he can even register it. “Pops?” His voice is quiet and terrified.

hold

Hearing footsteps from his spot on the couch, Buck tenses as Nathan comes up the stairs. It’s been so long, but Buck can still recognize the man’s footfalls. He lets out a breath he’d been subconsciously holding when Nathan finally appears and moves towards one of the armchairs across from him instead of the couch.

cover

“Jurassic Park!” Chris yells, and Buck has to cover his ears against the sound, the kid’s excitement causing him to be louder than usual. “Please, Dad, I know it’s kind of scary, but they just put it back on Netflix, and I’ve seen it before! Plus, I’m ten now, I won’t have nightmares!”

first

“I don’t want you to get hurt again,” Eddie says, meeting Buck’s gaze. His eyes are soft and despite his words, they shine with support, and Buck thinks—not for the first time—how lucky he is to have a best friend like Eddie.

together

Nathan’s study abroad had been nearly over when Buck brought up the idea of him going to Los Angeles to fight fires and help people. Nate had just nodded before taking Buck’s hand and kissing him, saying he’d buy the plane tickets in the morning. Buck had assumed they’d be going back together to be together.

small

Eddie glares at Chim when he insists on playing with the station’s small Hildy gadget that they keep in the kitchen. They mostly use it to play music, but Chimney takes the opportunity to ask her a bunch of questions throughout the day and only stops when Eddie threatens to run her over with a fire truck after Chimney starts asking her questions about the 118 themselves.

words for people I tag: home, care, love, make, and dream

no pressure tagging @mooshkat @jacksadventuresinwriting @ty-in-bedlam @lilbuddie <3

[olderthannetfic]

What are the current big m/m ships that the whole fandom flocks to, aside from the classics like destiel etc.? I have been hanging out mostly in f/f spaces for some time now and I kind fell out of touch with the m/m side of the fandom. Last I've checked there was the pirate show, but what about now? Are there any new juggernauts?

--

The newest hot ships aren't usually the massive, massive juggernauts. Those tend to be ones that have been around for a bit.

For my money, the most recent fandom-that-ate-fandom was The Untamed and the most recent juggernaut Wangxian

The way I usually get a read on what's up, at least for fanworks, is to go to the m/m tag on ao3 and then filter by date, exclude some things, etc. to see the top 10 or 20 or however many.

M/M sidebar right now:

Castiel/Dean Winchester (110014)

Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski (69463)

Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter (68358)

Sherlock Holmes/John Watson (67024)

James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers (60706)

Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens) (54149)

Minor or Background Relationship(s) (52143)

Sirius Black/Remus Lupin (45769)

Steve Rogers/Tony Stark (44367)

Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku (42793)f

Excluding those:

Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson (42475)

Lan Zhan | Lan Wangji/Wei Ying | Wei Wuxian (38426)

Jeon Jungkook/Kim Taehyung | V (37563)

Keith/Lance (Voltron) (32379)

Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester (31256)

Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs) (30502)

Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin) (30237)

Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood (29824)

Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter (29752)

Jeon Jungkook/Park Jimin (28995)

--

Filtered for the past year:

Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens) (16009)

Sirius Black/Remus Lupin (12242)

Minor or Background Relationship(s) (11413)

Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs) (9871)

Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson (8483)

Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter (8335)

Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku (8109)

Getou Suguru/Gojo Satoru (7878)

Regulus Black/James Potter (7768)

Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV) (7407)

Excluding those:

Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor (7267)

Original Male Character/Original Male Character (7110)

Castiel/Dean Winchester (6331)

Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet (6178)

Alhaitham/Kaveh (Genshin Impact) (6057)

Lan Zhan | Lan Wangji/Wei Ying | Wei Wuxian (5765)

John "Soap" MacTavish/Simon "Ghost" Riley (5517)

Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know (5477)

Neuvillette/Wriothesley (Genshin Impact) (4966)

Jeon Jungkook/Kim Taehyung | V (4571)

So the most boring BTS ship is still going strong, I see.

Generally, AO3 is ever more anime- and kpop-heavy in recent years. A lot of the action is in fandoms outside of ye olde US live action SF shows. I guess 9-1-1 being an emergency services show is kind of in the ballpark of ye olde buddy cop shows, and Stranger Things has been active, but a lot of what's going on is for canonically queer ships, video games, Asian media, etc.

The kinds of fandoms AO3 was built on aren't where the action is at the moment for the most part. (Well, aside from HP.) Though, of course, there are bajillions of mid-size fic fandoms at all times.

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buck & Eddie: 2023 - 2024 Rereleased and Unreleased Photos

A timeline of the photos that were released by JS, JCC & TM since 6B.

After TM (9-1-1 showrunner) recently released two "never before seen pictures" of Buck and Eddie, one as recent as last night, I started thinking about all the photos and videos that have been released of them since the start of 6B and it was quite interesting to see it all once I put them together.

Reminder, Buck and Eddie were barely shown to be work partners let alone friends for 98% of 6A and after 6x13 aired, they were shown to be living separate lives again for the remainder of 6B after Eddie was forced into dating again even though he said he wasn't ready. Aside from the Buckley-Diaz Family scene in 6x1 and the small amount of time they shared at the end of 6x7 and the time they were partnered in 6x13 (my favorite episode which was the finale for me since the last 5 episodes could have been yeeted to the sun); they didn't work side-by-side like they did before Eddie quit the 118 in 5x10. That's why the timing of the rereleased and unreleased photos and video is so jarring.

First, in April 2023, JS released the picture below of Buck and Eddie at the poker game before 6x13 aired and he spent most of that three-week mini hiatus counting down to the day when he was going to reveal it on Twitter or X or whatever it's called this week.

Second, in April 2023, a photo of the clapperboard was released weeks in advance for 6x17 which was an episode JCC directed. It includes a picture of Buck and Eddie at the bottom of it.

Third, also in April 2023, after 6x15 aired, several posts alluded to Twitter users being in an uproar about the introduction of ND and how Buck hurt Eddie’s feelings with that BS line about her seeing him (which everyone but Buck knows was a bunch of BS).

Don't try to debate me on this because Buck’s words hurt Eddie and it doesn't matter if they were intentional or not. He broke Eddie’s heart with that $hit so... I digress because thinking about it still pisses me off (it's been months but I'm still not over the way S6 ended).

Anyway, it was posted on Reddit (linked here) that JCC posted the photo from season 3 below on 9-1-1's TikTok account but the question is why would he release it since he didn't direct 6x15? The OP of the thread explained how he never posts things about episodes he didn't direct so it was interesting to read this information but since I only saw it on Reddit and nowhere else, it's unclear if there was a motive behind it.

Full disclosure: I don't have a Reddit or TikTok account, so I don't know if this post was legit but the date on it is April 25, 2023.

Fourth, in May 2023, right before 6x18 aired, TM decided to release a video of Buck and Eddie from season 2 but why did he do that? Especially right before that BS episode that had Eddie acting like he was in high school again and giggling over some chick he witnessed almost kiss her brother in the mouth in 6x5 and Buck settling once again for a woman who only wanted to use him for his "Firehose" and nothing else like AC, AM and TK did?

What exactly was the point? Was he trying to tell viewers something or was he just piddling around on FB like he did last year when he responded to a viewer with a long post about the storytelling decisions he greenlit for LS?

Reminder, TM was working on LS for the past two seasons while he left OG in the hands of KR who literally destroyed all of Buck’s character development and growth by regressing him with TK, LD and now ND. Seasons 5 and 6 went into a tailspin of Buck not growing or learning from his mistakes and the responsibility for that lies solely at the showrunner's feet and who was in charge? It was KR.

The way Buck's gazillion storylines ended was not long form storytelling especially since he was constantly being regressed. He said he didn't want to make the same mistakes but he kept making them and instead of letting him go back to therapy (which he clearly needs) she let him flounder and read self-help books and donate his sperm to that loser Connor (reminder Connor wanted to run out on his pregnant wife because the baby wasn't biologically his but I still believe the baby is his and not Buck's). She wouldn't let him talk to the team like he used to do so they could offer him some good advice about the important life decisions he was trying to make but in Season 5 she had no problem letting Buck tell the 118 about his dumpster fire of a relationship with TK.

Fifth, in January 2024, TM was at it again with posts on Facebook (I don't use FB) but this time he posted two unreleased photos of Buck and Eddie. Apparently, he released the one below a few days ago but it was discovered by a blogger who posted it on 911blr. Based on Eddie's appearance, it looks like it may have been from season 5, possibly sometime around 5x16 "May Day" but who knows.

Sixth, last night, the photo below was released by TM and it's never been seen before either. Based on Eddie’s appearance, this picture looks NEW like it might be from Season 7 but who knows with all the unreleased promos and pics from previous seasons that started circulating in S6.

In the photos above, Buck and Eddie are shown in every season except for the most important one... Season 4. The shooting is missing and so is the will reveal. (I don't count the picture on the clapperboard because it appears to be one JCC added to it for whatever reason and it wasn't an official photo or video like the others.)

So, are they still using the shooting and the will as the catalyst for them becoming a CANON couple? Only they know what they're doing but whatever it is the question has become why are they doing all these cryptic Buck and Eddie posts and releasing photos of just the two of them? What are they trying to say, if anything?

Hopefully it's not so they can do a repeat of the things they did at the end of seasons 4 and 6 and delay them getting together yet again.

If they're going to finally let them be together then it's time to stop with the delay tactics and get rid of all those one-dimensional LIs. Leave N and M in season 6 where they first appeared and should have remained.

If they aren't planning to make Buck and Eddie CANON then they should let them stay single. It's been 6 years; how long do they realistically believe viewers who actually care about them as characters are going to keep waiting? In the past, actors and actresses have left shows around the fifth, sixth and seventh seasons so hopefully that won't happen on 9-1-1 but nobody has time to wait around for 15 seasons for Buck and Eddie to get together.

[aida-sparks]

Buddie fans are relentless (and it's a good thing)

Geez, I was not prepared for the rollercoaster of woe that comes from shipping a pair that is not canon (yet!).

I am not a new fan to the show, 9-1-1. I've loyally watched every week for years, cherished the members of the 118, cherished Buck and Eddie's special relationship. I just hadn't been involved in the fandom of it all up until recently. I was just a tv viewer. But being newer to interacting with the fandom, I admit that consuming social media about 911 and Buddie has thrown me for a bit of a loop. I keep seeing the same recycled tactics to argue why people who ship buddie are delusional and why buddie will "never happen". These arguments are off-putting and frankly quite poor. (I don't like to focus on the negative so this will be my only post dedicated to this.)

Argument One: "There's already a gay couple on the show." No kidding. The statement is problematic in and of itself; people don't go around limiting the number of straight couples on a show, do they? It's fantastic that we have a strong, integral gay couple in Hen and Karen, two beautiful and fabulous lesbians, that are vital to this show, but why can't there be more? One representation alone doesn't cover the spectrum of LGBTQ+ portrayals of different romantic dynamics.

Argument Two: "Why can't we have two guys be close without putting a romantic label on it? It's refreshing to see male friendship." Bro... Platonic male friendship is important (all friendship is). It's not all that uncommon, though. Male friendship is focused on a lot already in many shows. But two adult male friends discovering new aspects of their identify that shift their relationship with each other toward something romantic? That's the more refreshing take here; it's one that we don't get to see in media right now but should. Flip the script, 9-1-1.

Argument Three: "They weren't introduced as gay or bi-sexual. It would be too out of left field to go there now." Not true. The show has the creative freedom to explore this narrative and can do it plausibly. There is obviously a very large part of the 9-1-1 fandom that has already interpreted Buck and Eddie's story as having the potential to become romantic. The pair has many parallels to the other canon couples on the show. There are plenty of moments and scenes from prior seasons (post-tsunami with Christopher, the shooting, the Will, all of Eddie Diaz's fond gazes aimed at Buck, etc.) that can be referenced in future episodes via well-crafted montage/edit that will help shed light on any developing feelings from either or both Buck and Eddie. Besides, not allowing a relationship to evolve into something different just because it didn't start out that way? What kind of stunted outlook is that? We want a story about how individuals can question and explore their sexuality at any age. Heck, during the graveyard scene near the end of season 6, Buck and Eddie talked about how experiences have changed them. They're clearly still growing and changing as individuals. It is not a stretch for them to discover whatever they've been searching for this whole time is actually found in each other. ---- That's it from me on this. I'm going to try doing a better job of ignoring the negative talk out there. I hope all buddie fans stay positive too, and when they call us relentless, we take that as a good thing. I hope we all recognize and resect the other characters and ships of this wonderful, wonderful show of ours too! Most of all, I hope we respect each other.

[dangerpronebuddie]

🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋📋👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻��👻👻👻👻

Hi Inell! Here's some sentences for you, dear.

From severed artery (psst @tizniz):

“I've got your back, remember?” Buck smiles. It quickly falters though. “You didn’t have to lie though.” Eddie frowns. “When did I lie?” Buck shrugs helplessly. “About Chris loving me like… a father.” “I didn’t lie,” Eddie says simply. “He does love you like a father.” Buck shakes his head in disbelief. “I know he loves me, but…” “Evan,” Eddie says. Buck’s head snaps up to look at him. “He went to you when he saw me with Kim. He goes to you every time he and I argue about something- even if it’s about being allowed to stay up late. And I don’t know for a fact, but I’m at least ninety eight percent sure you stayed with him after…” “Both times,” Buck says in a voice barely above a whisper. 

Clipboard Buck:

“Interesting reading material there, Eddie?” Hen asks, sitting on the opposite end of the couch Eddie’s sprawled across.  Truth be told, Eddie spaced out a good twenty minutes ago. It’s a good book- a great book- but Eddie’s mind hasn’t been exactly attentive in recent days. Or nights. He should be in the bunks, catching up on the sleep he didn’t get last night when he was looking up demisexuality.  “Honestly, I have no idea,” he admits, scrubbing a hand over his face.  Hen hums. “Something else on your mind?’ “Too much,” he mutters.  Hen shoves his legs off the couch and scoots closer. “Buck’s little clipboard adventure making you think?” Of course she saw right through him. Been trying to say something since Buck came out. But Eddie wasn’t ready to look at it. Truth be told, he doesn’t think he ever will be.  Just as he opens his mouth to speak, familiar footsteps stomp up the stairs.

And Danger Prone DIaz

Eddie shook his head and stepped inside. Bookshelves lined most of the room, with a grand fireplace on one wall. Eddie let out a low whistle. Had it not been for the dust and cobwebs, this place would've been gorgeous. He couldn't help but think Buck would love it. Maybe he'd find a way to sneak back with him if it really was empty. “Maddie would love this place,” Chim said, his Maddie-specific dreamy smile on his face.  “Buck would too,” Eddie commented.  “Put the heart eyes away, please,” Chim groaned.  Eddie raised an eyebrow at him. “I do not have heart eyes.” Chim grabbed him by the shoulders and spun him around to face the mirror above the fireplace and… yeah, maybe Eddie did have heart eyes. Sue him.  Something moved near the far wall and Eddie whirled around. He let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding when he saw it was just a cobweb moving in the breeze from the broken window.  “This place is getting to you, too,” Chim declared.  “It is not,” Eddie huffed. “I just thought maybe our patient was around here somewhere.” “Uh huh. White sheet and eerie glow included.”

Make Me Write!

[disasterbuck]

FanFic Ask Game

So I saw this post (linked above) and decided to answer all the questions instead of just reblogging and waiting for asks. Enjoy getting to know a bit more about me as a writer!

💖 What do you like most about your own writing?

I love how fluffy it generally is and how my fics always have a happy ending 🥰

😐 What embarrasses you most about your own writing?

I don't think I'm embarrassed about my writing? Maybe sometimes I'll write a kiss that feels a bit cringe?

👻 What is one WIP you think you may never pick back up?

'the heist wip'. Inspired by the episode Ocean's 9-1-1, I wanted to explore what situation could make them ACTUALLY turn to crime. I had a vague idea of a woman's dog being kidnapped by her abusive ex, and Buck gets all obsessed over it and eventually asks the rest of the team to help him break the dog out or something. idk. I don't have a solid enough idea and I feel like it would end up being a long fic which I just can't commit to atm. (If anyone reading this is inspired by this idea, feel free to write it!! But please tag me if you do! I would love to read it!)

👀 Do you have any WIPs that you would never let see the light of day? If yes, what are they about?

... I don't think so?

Yeah I've just had a skim through and can't find anything that I would never share if I managed to finish it.

📥 What is your fave fic to receive comments/messages on?

Ooohhh, I love getting comments on ALL my fics but I guess if I had to choose I'd probably go with Friends Don't (8.5k) because it has a special place in my heart.

✏️ Do you write every day?

Not strictly, but most days yes.

🖊 Post a snippet from a current WIP.

"Back to my point," Chimney said once Hen's laughter died down. "You two are codependent. I bet you couldn't even go a day without having to touch each other."

Buck's face flushed a darker shade of red.

"Yes we could," Eddie argued, suddenly stubborn and confrontational. "We could go a week."

"You wanna bet, Diaz?" Chimney asked, raising an eyebrow in challenge.

After a quick glance to communicate with Buck, Eddie nodded and said, "You're on. What are the terms?"

don't say his name wip

🏅 What is something you recently felt proud of in regard to your writing (finished a fic, actually planned for once, etc).

I wrote 4 drabbles exactly 100 words each!! It took quite a bit of editing and revising but I'm really happy with how they turned out! You can read them here if you're interested: buddie month | four drabbles

😈 Is there anything you enjoy doing that you think your readers hate?

fhdskjfhs I HOPE NOT 😅

🌙  What time of day do you prefer to write? Why?

I don't really have a preferred time of day?

👖 Are you a planner, plantser, or pantser? Is it consistent?

Yes. And no. lol

📊 Current number of WIPs

............................ 104 🙈

👨‍👧‍👧 Do you tell people in real life that you write fic? 

Depends ENTIRELY on the person. But generally yes. This does not equal letting them read my fics though lol.

🌝 Who is one character you haven’t yet written for that you would like to?

Hm, good question. Maybe Athena?

📝 What is one growth area you have for your writing?

Uhhh I don't know. I feel like I'm constantly learning about writing and just generally trying to improve in all areas.

📚 Do you read your own fic?

YES ALL THE TIME. I looooove reading over my fics. Makes me so happy!!

🤔 What is the hardest part of writing fic?

Writing kisses. Or endings. Both. Every time Buddie are about to kiss I tend to abandon the fic for a while lmaoooo and then whenever I have to wrap it up it takes me 3-5 business days.

🧠 What’s an idea you have that you can’t quite call a WIP yet?

Up for anything. All I've got for it so far is this:

Buck: No, I mean it. I'm up for anything. If you can come up with something I won't do you win. But I'm telling you right now I never back down from a dare.

💻 Do you do research for your fics? What’s the deepest dive you’ve done?

fhjskfh I hate research. My deepest dive is whatever happens in the show. I'll rewatch or maybe read wikis to make sure I get show details accurate but anything else? I'm making that shit up bestie 😅

✨ Choose three adjectives to complement your own writing.

🙈 sweet, emotional, aaaaaand heartwarming? idk

💭 What is a headcanon you have about your own work?

I don't have headcanons about my own work! Everything is canon! They're my works! My reality! YOU can have headcanons about my works lol.

🍰 Name one of your fave comfort fics (doesn’t have to be your all time fave).

Of my own or someone elses?

Of my own fics, I love you (4k) is my fave.

Someone else's, the first that comes to mind is The Best Lie is a Truth (My Best Mask is My Face) (43k) by @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels uggghhh it is chef's kiss!! Fake dating my beloved! 💕

👩‍🏭 If one of your fics was going to get you arrested, which one and why?

Lazy Mornings (1k) for being so freaking adorable 🥰

⏰ Do you spend more time reading fic, writing fic, or do you do both equally?

I think it's fairly equal? But maybe a bit more time writing, because a lot of the reading I do is of physical books rather than fic.

-

taglist because there's a sneaky snippet hidden above:

@dluoser @taketheplanspinitsideways @loudenthusiastic @wallywise @mxrcjqckspnchqsc

@therosesaredying @stillfuckingtired @classtrialguru @smolfunpenguin

@awesome-igi @natnuszsstuff @olliesrants @crazyfangirlallert @delirium1995

@brah3280 @meanceclosetohell @anythingeverythingallofthetime @sunflower-eddiediaz

@darkrose6578 @veronae-buddie @steadfastsaturnsrings @loveyouanyway @inell

@spicyrottingbrains @gnoeltop @idealuk @donationwayne @lemotmo

@smilingbuckley @realpersonwithrealfeelings @superlock-in-the-tardis @mjthe14thdoctor @strxwbereee

@idontknowwhatimdoing777 @ashleigh2658 @mari-lwyd-fannibal-blog @mineyneedsmoney

@spotsandsocks @unlifeira @pirrusstuff @buddiedaydreamer911

@littlevampireprincessuniverse @misshiss727 @i-put-the-star-in-bastard @hermioneindisguise @dangerpronebuddie

@specialbrownieeater @blue-winged-boy @bucks-daddy-issues @lightningmcqueer8

Let me know if you'd like to be added or removed 💕

p.s. I'm updating my taglist, check out the info on this post

[softest-epilogue]

doing an entire Eddie Diaz analysis because I keep seeing so much about the most recent episode/recent interviews about the episode, and what this means for his character, and it’s all annoying me. sooo here we go. spoilers for up to 911’s 7x07

with the cheating arc that’s on our doorstep, there’s so much I want to say. Ryan’s now mentioned it in the articles that came out post-episode how Eddie’s had this idealized version of his relationship with Shannon in his head & has been searching for that ever since she died. he fully calls it a delusion, which it is. everything he went though with Shannon was so intense. they were so young, it was mixed in with having Christopher & the trauma from Afghanistan, as well as him running away & then Shannon running away — it was a lot, a whirlwind. they got married on a technicality, because he felt like he should, like he had to with her getting pregnant. and because Eddie has historically put Christopher above everything else, wanting his mother to be in the picture, wanting to be that all-american nuclear family has been drilled into his head, so even despite her asking for a divorce right before dying, he still had this vision of what they should have been in his head. he’s been fully stunted since she died relationship wise. he’s trying to find what he thought he had with Shannon (& he feels he was supposed to have had). so we had Ana — who he both jumped into head first by introducing her to Chris as his girlfriend so soon, while simultaneously feeling so wrong about the idea of committing to her to the point of panic attacks. it felt wrong, he knew that, but he was trying to fit it into a certain box that just wasn’t happening. and then with Marisol, it’s honestly so not well thought out with the writers that it’s ridiculous at this point but we see him doing exactly the same thing — jumping into something (presumably) very quickly, having her move in when on screen we’ve barely seen or heard anything of her, haven’t seen Christopher with her, etc, while then also having the full freak out when she moves in & he finds out about the nun thing (cue catholic guilt/repression being actually said by Eddie despite it clearly being an overarching theme since the beginning with him). we know he’s stuck. he’s so stuck on this fantastical idea of him & Shannon in his head that it makes absolute sense that when he sees a doppelgänger of her, of course he’s going to do stupid shit. he doesn’t think relationships through deeply — yes, he overthinks so much to the point of panic, but he never actually does any introspection into it because he’s still so stuck on this idea of Shannon in his head since she died. I get people hate cheaters but like 1. it’s fiction and 2. it absolutely makes complete sense in this moment. he’s spiraling, has been spiraling for a long time. this is going to break apart in a very intense way for him (look at what Ryan said about how Eddie has always had someone to run to, but how he might not have that in season 8). however it happens — whether he accidentally calls her Shannon, or Buck sees them together and obviously calls Eddie out on his shit (both for lying to him & Chris, and also ya know, all of it) or some other big thing that happens that completely obliterates both what he has with Marisol & what he’s trying to do with Kim — it’s going to unravel. Ryan also said that season 8 is going to be almost like a “refresh button” for Eddie & an opportunity for him to finally let go of his past so that a new future can enter. we have to see this through. he has to unravel & spiral in a way that leads to real consequences for it to fully sink in for him. like I 100% think Chris is going to be involved in this, as well as Buck, but definitely Chris. he needs to disappoint Chris so much to the point where he’s smacked in the face with the reality of what he’s doing & has been trying to do for years in terms of relationships/finding a partner/finding a substitute mother for Chris. he needs to hit bottom before he can come back up stronger & better. people are focusing a lot on buddie in regards to everything with Kim & Marisol, and I do love them with my whole heart, but now isn’t the time. we need to see Eddie break down first. be by himself, realize he’s enough as a father, see what he really wants.

[wildlife4life]

Fuck-it Friday

Tagged several times before I even woke up! Haha. But thank you to these lovelies for the tags. @prince-buck-diaz, @bekkachaos, @thewolvesof1998, @heartbeatdiaz, @ebdaydreamer, and @transbuck

I think we all know what I'm about to drop, but also with the fun surprise of a fake instagram post! I'm getting nifty! So here it is, another snippet of NFL Buck and Firefighter Eddie secret relationship.

Chimney wasn’t trying to stalk Eddie on social media because it’s kind hard to when that person’s internet presence is almost non-existent. His twitter was practically tweet free, just retweets, mostly from WeRateDogs.  His Facebook profile was just about the same, with the most recent original post being about moving to Los Angeles. Instagram was a dead end, private and Eddie had yet to accept his follower request.

How the hell was Chimney supposed to find out anything about this mysterious boyfriend of Eddie’s? All he knew was that he made good money, had a sister, and worked out at some fancy gym. He needed to know more!

Chimney was just about to give up, then two weeks after the request, Eddie finally accepted.  The paramedic went on the deepest dive he could, clicking through post after post, noting most of his page were pictures of Christopher, a couple of group shots with his Houston firehouse, a handful of photos with who Chimney assumed were members of his family, including the once mentioned sisters, and a single picture of Eddie with two other paramedics in front of an ambulance for Austin, Texas.

It was the second to last picture though, that finally gave Chimney a lead.   

The photo was almost artistic in a sense, with the Longhorn’s stadium at field level, lit up by the lights with a beautiful Texas sunset in the background. It had 10 likes, and two comments.  One from his former paramedic captain Tommy Vega and the other, a single emoji from an account Chimney saw had liked every photo Eddie had posted. Buck4life.

The page was private, with a profile picture of a beautiful dog with a black coat, which looked a little familiar.  He had 10 followers but followed 100 plus.  Another dead end.

He clicks on tommy_vega_126, digs a bit there, and finds that she follows and is followed by Buck4life.  So, Eddie’s previous captain knows this ‘Buck’, who is most likely the mysterious boyfriend. Because who else besides family would like every photo and family doesn’t leave a cryptic, yet loving emoji on a photo that is reflecting on emotional beginnings.

Chimney’s conclusion: Buck4life was the boyfriend and they met during Eddie’s time working the Longhorn games. That boyfriend has a dog, which meant Eddie has a dog, and Chimney is really curious how that man comes into work without a single trace of dog fur on him.  Hen would definitely like to know.  Even since rescuing Pasiley, she has come in with some part of her civilian clothes and uniform decorated with white fur and she puts up a minor fuss about it every time.

He needed to find his best friend and present his new findings.

See nifty! And yes, they will have a dog, who is based off of Oliver Stark's own, Jade. Alright I hope you all enjoyed and if you want to see the other post from this wip, just click on the nfl tag on my page, they should all come up.

Tagging (sorry if already tagged and/or posted! No pressure!): @elvensorceress @911onabc @shortsighted-owl @thekristen999 @lizzybizzyzzz @cowboy-buddie @911-on-abc

[mr-and-mr-diaz]

In case our current situation is unclear: I have created a diagram I fondly call the Buddard Love Triangle.

Evan Buckley wants Eddie. He does not yet realize this, but he sure as hell wasn't flexing for Tommy at the station, Tommy wasn't there. However, in the plot's most recent development, Tommy has successfully gotten his attention. For now.

Tommy Kinard is interested in what the 118 has, particularly Evan Buckley it would seem. Or it could be he finds Buck hot and doesn't mind giving him a shot. I relate, Tommy, though I am an Eddie stan at heart.

Eddie Diaz is currently with Non-Chemistry Girlfriend #26, but we already know that won't last. Do you ever wonder, my guy, if perhaps your choice in safe, chemistry-free relationships might be you shielding yourself from something more...?

[theclaravoyant]

(nothing will change) if you never choose ~ 911 buddie (Rated T)

AN ~ Prompted by @exhaustedpigeon on Tumblr. Thank you! I had a lot of fun writing this, I hope you like it!

Prompt #962 for @911actions Gotcha For Gaza event. The prompt period is now over, but you can still show your support for a good cause! MASSIVE thank you to the incredible galaxy brain G4G chat members without whom this fic would simply not be what it is x

Title from Who Do You Love - Marianas Trench

Relationships: Buddie, Eddie & Christopher, Eddie & Maddie, Eddie & Karen, Eddie & Dispatch Crew, Buddie & Christopher.

Shippers on Deck, Feelings Realisation, Feelings Confession. Set post S7. Past mentions of Maddie/Doug and Buck/Tommy.

Read on AO3 (~4300wd)

Summary:

It's been a long time since Eddie Diaz has had friends. Even longer since he's felt like he knows who he is, and what he wants. The Dispatch Wine & Whine crew are here to nudge him in the right direction.

(nothing will change) if you never choose

Wine & Whine nights were a Dispatch thing long before Eddie came along. They persisted once he'd left as well, and he'd removed himself from the invitation. Recently though, when Christopher had left and Buck had gotten involved with Tommy and he was feeling so desperately lonely, more than he dared look too closely in the eye, he'd begged back in. They'd taken pity on him enough to have him, and let him start turning back up with barely a word except to heave a sigh and let as much of the weight of the world as he dared fall off between them.

He didn't share everything of course – far from it – but it was a plus that they were all either parents or first responders or both. Maybe they hadn't been shot out of the sky but they'd all been through their own shit and he kind of knew parts of it; enough to know that they got him, enough for him to start to trust it. They understood that there'd be landmines inside him, and rocks under which they shouldn't be too keen to look, and they all had their own too. And sometimes they talked about them, or around them – about the rough calls, about the struggles of being so close to those who threw themselves at danger every day, and yet so far. Sometimes they just talked about what was going on with Jee and Mara and Josh's new boyfriend Leon (most recently, they'd got a cat). It was nice. Eddie had even managed to convince himself to stick with it as the world turned right side up again around him. He was starting to figure there might be something to Frank's advice after all, about talking to someone who understood, and about spreading his identity eggs – or something; he's sure he's mixing Frank's metaphors - between more baskets.

Change of plans. W&W at the Wilsons tonight, Maddie sends the group chat.

Trading your husband for a decent pinot? Can relate, Josh sends.

Maddie sends a laugh emoji. Karen prefers Epicuro.

I can bring a decent pinot, Eddie offers. He's still got a bottle of Rodney Strong unopened and gathering dust on top of the fridge; it's been stting there since he and Marisol were dating. The offer is met with several little heart reacts and an enthusiastic series of red wine emojis from Josh and maybe it's silly but it makes him smile. It feels like such a long time since he's had friends.

Out of the corner of his eye, he feels Christopher watching him. He's smiling too.

“Are you texting Buck?” Christopher asks. Eddie chuckles. “Actually, no.”

“Uh huh. Are you sure?” His eyes narrow.

“Sure I'm sure. Don't you worry, Buck has clear instructions to leave you alone for the night unless you contact him. Message has been received loud and clear. But if you do need him, his phone number, and Uncle Chim's and Hen's are on the fridge, okay?”

“I have Buck's phone number,” Christopher reminds him. “And Uncle Chim, and Hen, and Bobby. And Abuela, and Tia Pepa, and Mrs Hudson from two doors down.”

“And the emergency services?”

Christopher groans and throws his head back. “Come onnnnnn. Aren't you going to be late to something?”

“That's for me to worry about,” Eddie retorts, but the attitude only makes his heart soar further. He's back, and so Chris, and he'll gladly suffer that glare every day for the rest of his life if he has to. He grins. “Why? You're planning on throwing a party the second I walk out of here, aren't you.”

Christopher shakes his head. “I want to order pizza and use the big TV for my channel launch.”

“Right, right.” Eddie grabs his battered wallet, and tries to remember which one of these folds still has some cash tucked away inside it.

“It's okay, Dad,” Chris says, matter-of-factly. “My fans will cheer me the bits for it.”

Eddie's not sure if he's serious or not about the terminology. But the concept? Christopher's eyes are steady, confident. His jaw is set. As much as when he'd insisted on skateboarding, or horseriding, or the Tower of Terror. Only one of those he's pretty sure Chris regrets.

“You're serious about this, huh?”

“As a tsunami.”

Eddie holds back the urge to pull his son against him and never let go. He holds out a twenty instead.

“Consider it an investment in your future.” He sighs. “Alright. Off I go. Phone's on the counter, first aid kit's on the bench. Don't burn the place down, alright?”

“No promises,” Chris teases, by which he means, of course I won't, you idiot. But he has a fond smile for his dear old dad, and he doesn't object when Eddie scoops him in for just a moment and presses a quick kiss to the top of his hair. Then Eddie picks up the wine in one hand and his keys in the other, and manages to force himself out the door.

-

“My pinooot,” Josh sings, opening the door for Eddie and brushing past his – completely unnecessary, per the rules of W&W – apology with a teasing smile. “Ooh, hello Rodney. Get inside me. And hello to you too, I guess.”

Eddie rolls his eyes. “It's nice to be missed. And I'll have one too. Since you're offering.”

“Done.”

“So, how's Chris?” Karen asks as he drops his bag and moves further into the room. She, Maddie and Linda are already half a bowl and some change deep into a bag of chips and some pickle-sausage-cheese hors d'ouevres. “This is his first big night alone, huh?”

Don't remind me, Eddie groans silently.

“Not his first,” he insists. Though he's not sure that time he rounded the corner to the Taco Bell and watched his phone like a hawk for fifty nine minutes and fifty seconds technically counts.

“Mmhmm.” Karen nods. She meets eyes with Josh and gestures, make it a heavy one, and Josh adds a little extra to his pour before handing it over. Eddie draws a long, deep, grateful sip and sinks into the seat they've left open for him.

“He's so grown up,” he laments. “I feel like I've missed it all of a sudden. He's tall. He's shaving. The other night he came to me asking for help to get a job!”

“Ooh, been there,” Linda sympathises, waving her own glass in the air for some of the newly-arrived red. Josh obliges. “Ben's off to college, it feels like yesterday! He's what, fifteen though, right? Didn't you have a job at his age?”

“Yeah; had my first paper route when I was twelve. But he- he gets pocket money and stuff, you know? He shouldn't need it. I provide for my son.”

“Nobody's saying you don't,” Josh points out, “but there's more to a job than the finances. Schools and jobs are pushing for experience more and more these days. Maybe Chris wants to get his foot in the door. Or maybe just a bit of independence, you know?"

Eddie groans. Out loud this time.

“Ahhh, the i word,” Maddie sighs with a groan of her own. “On that, I can relate. There's nothing wrong with not wanting Christopher to live the life you did, Eddie. I mean, here's to hands-off parenting. But there's got to be a balance, right? Otherwise... Jee will never learn to tie her own shoes.”

She pouts, as if the very prospect of either path forward troubles her, and the others nod in commisseration. Eddie only wishes that was the entirety of the problem at hand.

“Oh, he's being plenty independent about it,” he explains. “He's decided he's going to be a Twitch streamer, apparently.”

“Oh.” Karen scoffs. “So the problem isn't just that he's being independent, it's that you don't like what he's doing with his independence.”

“Which is kind of the point of independence, no?” Josh finishes for her, one sharp eyebrow raised at Eddie.

“Look, it's not that I don't like it -” even though I barely have a clue what it is - “it's just that... I'm not sure it's going to go anywhere for him. It's not, you know. Sustainable. Successful.”

“What are you talking about?” Linda objects, and points a finger before Eddie can do more than open his mouth again. “You sit down, Mr HILDY Hater Fan Club. I think Christopher would rock a Twitch. He totally helped me beat Tomb Raider! And Among Us? Please. He's already getting clipped on Tiktok. I just know a series on Baldur's Gate or something would go wild. That kid's hilarious. You never know. He could make bank.”

Eddie blinks. He's still catching up with the image of Gamer Linda and how this somehow didn't manage to come up earlier. Between that and cheering bits, everything feels like jibberish.

“That was English, right?” he jokes, and peers into his wine glass. “How much have I had?”

“Come on.” Linda laughs. “He's just being creative. Plus, this way he doesn't have to deal with a lot of the constraints of a minimum wage junior job. Me, I worked a deli counter at fourteen, and it sucked ass. You're always standing for too long, lifting stuff you probably shouldn't be lifting. Got held up a couple times.”

(“Ah, the road to Dispatch,” Josh cheers, raising his glass to the room.)

“You don't have to risk him getting held up, though,” Maddie interrupts, before Eddie can jump on that particular point and spiral. “Denny coaches Little League, right? And I know Harry – Harry works at that skate shop. Or was it a surf shop? That might be a bit outside Christopher's wheelhouse but I'm sure there's something more... conventional out there for him, if you want.”

“I do want,” Eddie agrees. He takes a deep breath. “But right now, no thanks. I made a promise. He gets a month to try this Twitch thing and we'll re evaluate after that.”

“Aw. Look at you being all normal about your kid's choices,” Karen praises. “The first time Denny came home in new shoes he bought himself I'm pretty sure I cried for an hour and then called all the local engravers to have a trophy made.”

“So what I'm hearing is, you have a hook up.”

“Oh God.” Maddie cringes. “Don't tell Chimney. We can't afford the storage.”

She's joking. Mostly. But nevertheless, in the chat there appears a link to Solas & Sons, Pasadena.

“Seriously though,” Karen repeats, “let me know and I'll ask around. I'm sure we could use a mind like his at the lab. Priya has a series of lectures on the evolution of deep space photoimagery coming up she'll need transcribed.”

“Thanks, Karen,” Eddie replies. “He'd love that – he's on a real astrophysics kick at the moment. I'll keep you posted.”

His phone buzzes. He jumps for it.

It's Buck.

Are you SURE you don't want me to call in on Christopher?

Thanks, but no. He's got this. Eddie looks at the clock. It's almost been half an hour since he left and he hasn't quite lost his mind yet. Maybe he's more ready for this than he thought. Throwing his phone through the roof at the mere prospect of a message just now notwithstanding.

Ok, Buck agrees.

Then: [Frowny face]. [Clock] [Clock] [Clock] [Clock].

Eddie can't help smiling even as he tries to turn his phone face-down again.

“What about you, Linda?” he asks. “What's going on in the Bates' sphere?”

Somehow, already, he's looking again. He can't help it.

I'm nervous, Buck says. I feel crazy. Do you think I baby him too much since he came back?

You're fine, Eddie sends back. I started it.

Did you know about this, btw?

Buck sends a link to what is, apparently, Christopher's newly launched Twitch channel. 'CYBERTSUNAMI [Cool Guy Emoji]'. He's got what appears to be a live feed of Fortnite playing, the screen dominated by his own avatar leading through the game. There's a chat window in the corner and – well, by Eddie's expectations at least – it is blowing up. One particular message catches his eye.

Caligirl0404 writes: wtf is your 'Buck'?

In their own chat, Buck sends: He's talking about me?? [Star eyes emoji]. BRB I need to find something for this kid to sign to prove I knew him before he made it big.

Eddie barks a laugh. He immediately covers his mouth, but can't quite obscure his smile, and he knows it's just embarassingly luminescent because of the way they're all looking at him. They've been looking at him like that for a while now, especially when the topic of Buck comes up. It's this soft, sparkly sort of look like they're waiting for him to figure out something they know that he doesn't. But he does know, and it has something to do with that warm feeling he gets whenever he thinks about him. Since Buck came out – since Tommy – he's been sort of wondering. If someone like him... if those feelings could be... “How is my dear brother?” Maddie asks, swirling her chardonnay like she knows something. Which she definitely does. “And how's Tommy? I haven't seen much of either of them since the break-up.”

“Buck's fine,” Eddie says. “Tommy's – also fine, sort of. I think. They left things on good terms, as far as I know. No harm, no foul. They just wanted different things.”

Karen nods. “Buck wants kids.”

Josh snorts into his wine glass. Eddie's hands freeze on his own.

“What?” Josh all but splutters. “Our Buck? As in, Evan James Firehose Buckley?”

But Eddie asks - “How did you know?"

“Oh, please!” Karen cries. “Uncle Buck? He lives for them. Plus, he already kind of has one, and you know he loves Christopher more than life itself. I know it sounds crazy, but – and on pain of death, he can never know this, alright? – I see myself in him, that way. I know. I know. But he has this passion. And it's not something fleeting, it's this drive. You know when it's something you really want, and if there's one thing I've learnt about Buck over all these years it's that that man wants to make a family more than anything else in this world.”

Eddie closes his eyes. It's too much to think about, and Karen's steady gaze is boring into him like she can see straight through to the supercut of Buck, and Chris, and Buck-and-Chris that plays at all times in his heart. He can still picture Buck telling him about the break-up like it was yesterday. Too close in their kitchen with his eyes doing that very solemn sort of shine like they did the night he'd told him about he and Tommy being he-and-Tommy in the first place.

-

“Hey. What's W&W?” Buck had asked. “You and Tommy going to some new extreme sport I don't know about?"

“Uh, no.” Eddie had shaken his head. “Tommy and I are... taking a break, for a while.”

“Oh.” Buck had frowned. “Not 'cause of me though, right? I told you: me and Tommy are cool. We just want different things.”

“Wasn't my idea,” Eddie had promised. “He's still a little sore about you guys, and apparently, me starting every other sentence with 'Buck' isn't helping.”

A quiet blush had crept onto Buck's cheeks at that and he'd bitten his lip. Eddie knew that meant he was holding back something he felt he shouldn't say. He was probably thinking, he's sore over me? and not wanting to admit it was kind of flattering. Eddie had wanted to tell him that anyone would be. Well, anyone should be. It was just Tommy's bad luck that he was apparently one of the first who understood that.

“It's not all bad,” Buck had said, and it must have been the truth: he'd never been one for the stiff upper lip approach when he could help It. Yet he'd smiled. “Feels good, actually. Even though it sucks. You know? It's like these pieces of the puzzle of my life are falling into place. Tommy helped me find some of those pieces. But he knows kids aren't part of his puzzle and I've decided... for me they are. Does that make sense?”

“It makes perfect sense,” Eddie had assured him. “You're a great dad.”

And Buck had looked at him with this face like – like he didn't quite believe it. Or at least that he was surprised at Eddie's choice of words. That he is. Not that he will be, or would be, or could be. He gets that face a lot, and more and more lately, Eddie wants to kiss it off him. That's another thing that's been lingering on Eddie's mind of late. The pieces of that puzzle of his own.

-

“Penny for your thoughts?” It's Maddie and her big, brown, powerful Buckley eyes who knocks Eddie out of his reverie.

He sighs, and drinks, and drums his fingers on the bottom of his wine glass, until the words come to him.

“When I was at Dispatch,” he says at last, “May and I had this talk. About the future and if she wanted to stay on and all that. And she said to me this thing about how when she was younger, she'd had this vision in her head of who she wanted to be – 'a very specific person,' she said - and she felt like she'd lost that.”

There's a hush around the room. They watch him softly, nod quietly in their own recognition.

“And I thought yeah, me too,” he continues, down the path inside him precious few others have ever tread. “I had this idea of myself, when I was her age. Hell. Not even. About what a man was and how I was going to be one, and a soldier, and a husband, and now I'm none of those things. I don't really know what I am.”

Maddie nods.

“I remember,” she says softly. “I had an idea of who I thought I was going to be before Doug... The family I thought we'd have, the job, everything. Even myself. I was going to be a nurse. After him I never could.”

“Can you believe,” Karen adds, “I might have been an honest to God astronaut?”

These are their landmines.

Eddie takes a deep breath, and finds his eyes are suddenly burning. In the quiet, it's so obvious. He hates how his voice sounds when he gets upset, all choked and shakey; it brings his father's scolding to his ears and it's one of so many things he thought he'd be over by now. He'd always thought he'd be stronger.

“I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm happy for him,” he manages. “I'm proud of him. For knowing who he is and what he wants and standing up for that. I love that for him. I do. But honestly, I'm kind of jealous. I wish I could do that too.”

“Eddie,” Maddie breathes, like his words have hit her square in the chest.

He tries to laugh it off, and shrug, like don't mind me, bawling my eyes out and I'm not even half a glass in. But he's in a room full of people who listen for a living. Who spend their days, their lives – who are called, if Linda is to be believed, with the same passion and instinct that's brought him to firefighting – to see people through moments just like this. He's never felt so simultaneously exposed and supported.

(Except maybe that time when Buck had broken down his locked door. Listened to him cry I'll never feel normal again and helped him tape up his walls anyway.)

Linda bumps her shoulder against him.

“It's not too late, Eddie,” she assures him. “For everything there is a season. Remember, it wasn't too long ago you weren't even sure you wanted to be a firefighter? Trust. In God, in the universe, in yourself. Have faith, and it'll come to you.”

“May did end up going back to school,” Karen continues. “She's figuring herself out. Me, I've got a family I love and no regrets. And as for Buck? Please. It's not like he hasn't had a long and winding road to get where he is either. We all have. So go easier on yourself, will you? You're thirty. Not ninety. You've got time.”

Eddie nods, but he still curses his hands for shaking. Can Christopher call now, please, he begs – God, the universe, himself. Can someone talk me off this ledge before my heart does it for me.

Josh catches his hands, takes the glass from them and puts it on the table, and then chases his eyes until he surrenders to the contact. For all their petty rivalry, the man does have a surprising amount of gravitas about him when it comes to the moment of crisis.

“Eddie,” he says. “Tell me about that man you want to be.”

He wants to be funny, he thinks, and he's not sure why that's the first thing that comes to mind. He wants to be loved, and feel safe. He wants to raise Christopher to feel the same. He wants to be brave and strong, but more than that: he wants to be vulnerable and soft and needy and silly. Things he never really got to be as the man of the house, or the soldier, or the husband, or the widower. Or the father, even, really – because as much as he loves Christopher, he can't share his whole self with him. That's the sacrifice of a father. A good one, anyway. And maybe, now that he thinks about it, therein lies one of the greatest struggles he's had with his own father and even with his faith. Above all else a father should shield his son from the worst the world has to offer, even if said father has done it, seen it, struggled against it. Yes, he wants that, of course he wants that, but he wants someone to share it all too. He wants to be able to be his best self and his worst self, his strongest and his weakest, and to know there's someone in his corner and it's all going to be okay. He wants a partner, and to be one in return.

And he opens his mouth.

And nothing comes out.

Because everywhere he looks in this little revelation, there's a startling amount of Buck. Everywhere his favourite self is, is Buck, Buck, Buck.

There's that sparkly look in their eyes again.

Linda smiles knowingly. “He's telling you something, isn't He?”

Eddie looks at her. At Josh. At Karen and Maddie, who have moved closer together now and are holding each other's arms like they know what's coming.

“I- maybe,” he confesses. “But I can't- I'm not ready.”

There's still that voice, his mother's voice, that says, Don't drag him down with you.

And Buck, breaking down a locked door and patching up his walls anyway.

“Oh, ready,” Maddie scoffs. She must be catching the tears off him, but she waves a hand dismissively. “Nobody's ever 'ready.' You think I was ready when Chimney asked me to watch Mission Impossible the first night I officially moved here? Or when Buck called us out about Buffridays and made us see our relationship for what it was? I still jumped every time I dropped a plate in front of him for years. And Doug came for us anyway. And we survived. If I'd waited until I was ready we might both be dead. And we wouldn't have Jee-Yun. We wouldn't have any of this life we've built. So I have no regrets. Maybe not everything happens for a reason, but it still happens, and we still have to make a life out of it, don't we? When you find the right person, Eddie, they get down in the trenches and make a life with you. And I promise you, there's nothing better than that.”

Josh looks up at her. He still hasn't let go of Eddie's hands. “If I didn't know better,” he jokes, “I'd say you're trying to set Eddie up with your brother.”

“I said I liked you too much,” Maddie jokes back. She hasn't taken her eyes off Eddie. Her lip curls up into a smile. “Eddie and I, we were never that close.”

His phone buzzes.

He takes a deep breath, and pries a hand free off Josh to check it.

It's Buck. He's sent one of those meme videos captioned: guinea pigs when they get petted be like and Eddie just knows he's got that stupid, smitten Buck Smile on again. He can't help it.

“Call him,” Josh whispers.

“Oh my God, call himmmmm,” Karen urges, shaking Maddie's arm in anticipation.

“What if he says no?” Eddie asks. Because that feels like something he should prepare himself for. Even if it feels strangely impossible, honestly, he might not survive it.

“A wise man once told my husband,” Maddie advises. “That life is short and we're not promised tomorrow. If you love him. Tell him.”

It rushes through him in an instant. Shannon, the helicopter, the car crash, the lightning strike. If you love him, tell him.

He swipes his thumb across the screen and Buck picks up almost instantly. Because of course he does. Because he's Eddie, and this is Buck. He gets up and Karen herds him outside for some privacy. Before he can let himself second guess - again - he clears his throat.

“Hey man. Have you got a minute?”

[eddiebabygirldiaz]

oooh getting high/fwb and s2 angsty sex? 👀

getting high/fwb is my most recent wip and it's beloved to me and should actually be out soon! basically buck and eddie fall into a fwb arrangement bc they are idiots and then one night they are at buck's loft chilling because they have a few days off and they get high which leads to some messy conversations, inadequate love confessions, and sloppy sex

here's a snip:

Buck smiles at Eddie, baring his teeth and gums, and releases Eddie’s thigh to waggle his fingers in Eddie’s face.

An inelegant snort rips out of Eddie right before he leans forward to playfully bite at Buck’s fingers. Buck yelps and yanks his hand back, glowering at Eddie.

Eddie gives him a lazy shrug in response, all loose and unrestrained the way Buck likes him best. His crooked grin stays on his face, like it’s a permanent thing he couldn’t ever hope to get rid of, and jerks his chin toward the blunt as Buck brings it to his mouth again.

“You gonna let me have a taste?” Eddie asks.

Buck nearly replies, Of the weed? Or of me?

He doesn’t though. Mostly because his tongue feels too thick to produce words but also because he thinks he knows the answer based solely on the look in Eddie’s eyes that seems to scream both and all of it and everything.

Of course, Buck could be seeing what he wants to see, dangerously induced by the weed to see something in Eddie that would mean they are on the same page, that Buck isn’t alone in this, that his expansive and indefinable want actually has a match.

His mind works through it all with a painful degree of slowness as if attempting to capture the image of an Eddie who might feel the same so that Buck can look at it later. Unfortunately, this means that there is a too long pause after Eddie’s question which Eddie must take to mean that Buck is hesitant about sharing.

Sharing has never been something Buck has hesitated over but it has gotten him in a lot of trouble before. Still, Eddie should know Buck will always give him what he asks.

Eddie raises a very judgy eyebrow and pokes Buck’s cheek. “Afraid I got cooties or somethin’?”

and s2 angsty sex is an old wip me and beloved jenwyn cooked up that is basically a s2 rewrite where buck and eddie are having sex and develop feelings but then shannon comes back and doesn't die so there are...complications

here's a snip!

Eddie wants him.

Buck shouldn’t play into it. He should walk away right now.

It would be stupid to flirt with Eddie. It would be stupid to start something like this with a coworker that he can’t stand.

But Buck isn’t the best at doing the smart thing, and he’s even worse at doing what is good for himself, so he takes that raging fire burning inside of him and plies it with the image of Eddie. He rakes his eyes over Eddie, his floppy hair, his dark brown eyes, his flushed cheeks, the stubble covering his jaw, the slick sweat sliding down his muscles, the way his chest starts to heave the closer Buck gets.

Eddie is infuriating and arrogant and confident and so damn gorgeous and he’s here. He’s right here and despite how much he is clearly exasperated with Buck, desire is painted across his face, stark and bright like the violent brushstroke of red against a white canvas. He’s looking at Buck like a drowning man looks at the shore and it strokes a soothing hand over the ugly, desperate creature lurking in his chest.

For the first time since Abby left, Buck feels. It’s something other than pain, something deliciously hot and vibrant and it settles within the hole of his chest all snug and comfortable. Buck has chased the feeling of being wanted his whole life and smug Eddie Diaz is right here unknowingly handing it to Buck and Buck has never been able to turn something like this down.

ask me about my wips

[canonicallyobserving911]

Helena Diaz is a huge problem but Eddie has a blind spot for his mother and if the show isn't going to deal with it, she'll get away with all the crappy things she's said to him.

(Clearing drafts before season 8.)

Recently, while I was writing fanfics that are primarily focused on my favorite character, Eddie Diaz, I realized something about the Diaz parents' quick trip to L.A. in 7x10 and it was quite shocking. When the finale aired, I thought it was interesting they hadn't been shown in CANON since season 5 and prior to that they were only in Eddie's flashbacks in 3x15; therefore their actions in 7x10 were suspect. IMO, the only reason they showed up when Chris called in 7x10 was because Helena's been trying to get Eddie to move back to El Paso since 2x18 and before he relocated to L.A., she tried to convince him to leave Chris with her and Ramon.

Before I get started, I need to indicate that Ramon and Eddie reconciled in 5x17, therefore the majority of this post is about Helena's motivations along with the way she's always tried to control the situation. She never wanted Eddie to leave El Paso and now that she has Chris and they're raising him, I think her plan is still to get Eddie to do what she wants him to do. I don't like her because she's manipulative and controlling and I saw that smug look on her face when they were leaving. She never listens to Eddie and she's always trying to get her way. Furthermore, she's said a lot of mean and hateful things to him like "Don't drag him down with you, Eddie." What type of mother would say something like that to her child?

Prior to 7x10, it was extremely strange that Helena and Ramon didn't ever visit L.A. when they had the chance or when they should have. Eddie got shot in 4x13 and in 4x14 he had a welcome home party but they weren't there. Sure, it was during the pandemic and the actor and actress may not have been able to travel to be on set but they DIDN'T EVEN CALL. Carla did a FaceTime call with Eddie and Chris earlier in season 4, so what's the deal?

Also, in 5x17, Eddie told both of his parents "Planes fly in both directions" but they still didn't show up and he said that after his mental breakdown. They didn't know about it but in 6x15 Helena guilt tripped Eddie into traveling to El Paso for the weekend even though they were busy with Chris' extracurricular activities. Ramon's retired and Helena doesn't work so what the actual "F" is going on?

It seems like the only reason why they appeared in season 7 was so Helena could finally get what she wanted and that was to pick up Chris. She may have thought if she said Chris was going to live with them indefinitely, Eddie would move back to Texas but that's not happening.

The reason I'm not including Ramon in most of this is because as usual, he got his information about Eddie second hand from Helena the same way he used to while Eddie was growing up. Reminder, Ramon was on the road for work and any information he got about their children was told to him by Helena.

I did a post on the Diaz Dynamics (linked here) back in 2022 and based on the way everyone was standing in the backyard, it looks like Helena doesn't really get along with Ramon's side of the family.

I really don't understand why Eddie hasn't figured out his mom is the problem. She got an UNDESERVED REDEMPTION (related post) just like the raggedy Buckley parents and Sang Han. Can the writers PLEASE address these shitty parents and stop trying to retcon and redeem them? It would be different if they got a redemption arc like Toni and Hen, Athena and Beatrice and Eddie and Ramon but they didn't so this is getting ridiculous.

It's perfectly normal to show that all parents aren't good and even though it's their adult children's decision to forgive them, all of them don't deserve to be redeemed.

[slightlyobsessedwitheverything]

Truth or Dare Tag Game

i was tagged by @diazsdimples and @hippolotamus thank you 🤗

Which friends/mutuals would you call to hide a body?

i feel like @minthalo would have my back

How many user subscriptions do you have on Ao3?

2 surprisingly. i have only posted 2 very short fics several years ago 🤷‍♀️

Do you have a crush on someone? OR If you're with someone, tell us one thing you love about them.

i have a lil friend crush on @hippolotamus 😘 idk if i have any like crush crushes lol

What does the last DM/text you sent say?

“tell me you don’t understand the depth of their relationship without telling me”

i saw some BUCKWILD takes where people were minimizing buck’s place in eddie and christopher’s lives 🙄

List the three friends/mutuals with the best takes

@probablynotpoppin @minthalo and @usersiren maybe it’s bc we all exist in the same bubble lol but we all tend to agree on things most of the time

Share one of your favorite fics of all time

to be found by @zainclaw is a truly fantastic werewolf au fic

and this one’s not a fic, but a series:

the archer by nonalovesyou deals with eddie learning he is autistic, realizing he’s gay, and everything that comes after

List three of your favorite content creators

if we’re talking here on tumblr, @iinryer and @try-set-me-on-fire make BEAUTIFUL 911 art and though unfortunately i can’t tag them, @gayhoediaz writes some of my favorite fics in this fandom

Write one thing you love about yourself

i think i’m funny 😌

Which fandom of yours (past or present) has the best fics?

911 has some pretty good ones, but i think some of the best fics i’ve read were in the reddie/IT fandom

Which creation of your own are you the most proud of?

i started making photosets recently and i’m happy with both of them :)

eddie+shannon • loml -Taylor Swift

s5 eddie • Secrets - Rachael Jenkins

(i also recently finished a maddie gifset so 🫣 mayhaps i will post that soon)

Have you ever read RPF?

yeah of course. y’all remember mavin?

Tag the mutual(s)/friend(s) most likely to get away with murder

honestly idk if any of y’all would commit murder let alone get away with it 🤷‍♀️

Tag the mutual(s)/friend(s) who know(s) the most about you

@probablynotpoppin ! we’ve known each other for just about 13 years 🥰

Now tag some friends to play!

@probablynotpoppin @usersiren @bigfootsmom @minthalo @messyhairdiaz @tommykinrd @giddyupbuck @babygirl-eddie-diaz @thequeenofcarvenstone

[apassingbird]

Hey! Promise I’m not coming into your ask box to cause trouble, I just saw your most recent post and that you were wanting to talk about it so I wanted to get your perspective on my thoughts about this s7 spec. It is a lovely thought, Buck getting reassurance from Eddie of his importance in his and Chris’ lives, and I’m not saying it shouldn’t happen (probably will based on the Shoulder pic we saw). However…it’s been done before. What I would find way more interesting than Buck being told he matters again and that being that is Buck actually realizing and believing it, maybe from a call or some other activity. And I’d really like that to be it lol, instead of it being recycled again in a future episode. People like Eddie, Maddie, and even Chris can tell him how much he means to them until the cows come home, but Buck needs to start believing it himself. IRL, ppl get tired of having to repeat themselves to somebody who is chronically insecure but not doing anything to change it (not saying Buck is, but he sure is portrayed that way in fanfiction). So I’m hoping the writers empower Buck to look in the mirror and see himself as the good flawed human he is rather than a massive fuck-up.

(and maybe there are scenes in the future where Buck is reassuring the Diaz boys how important they are to him, and they’re not an inconvenience no matter what’s going on in his life because that would feel realistic too. I know Buck shows them throw his actions, but it would be delicious to see it actually said onscreen)

Anyway, no pressure replying!

hi!

i am completely with you on the whole rehashing the whole eddie/chris/maddie reassuring buck of it all, and how it's been done before (because it has, a lot - like i said in that post, we've seen eddie tell buck this over and over again, but he just doesn't get it). i do think that we will get to see those kind of scenes/moments again though, especially if that one buck and eddie pic is anything to go by.

what i'm hoping for is that this time it'll lead to buck actually, conciously listening and taking in what it means and, y'know, finally stop questioning it or having this underlying fear of being abandoned etc. i don't think any one of those three conversations will magically solve anything for buck (and it's not on maddie, eddie or chris to solve it to begin with, even though their support is important - like you said, buck needs to come to this conclusion himself), but i think, depending on the context, the conversations can work as a final push to have him realize that his place is permanent.

it'll just get old and boring to see him have a breakdown again over the same thing and have eddie tell him again and again that he's important, and then rinse and repeat a few episodes later. he truly needs to sit down and deal with his shit, so to speak. i would love for his therapist to make a comeback, so that he can deal with his fears with professional help. really get to the nitty gritty of it all. that'd be 10/10 in my book, tbh.

and yes, fully agree on having buck actually tell both eddie and chris what they mean to him, and what an essential part they are in his life. i think they'd need to hear it, too, even if he does, as you said, show it a lot. just hearing it is nice too, sometimes, y'know.

anyways, hopefully this is somewhat coherent, i'm answering whilst making dinner, so it might be a bit all over the place. but thank you for sending me this!

[rphunter]

Heyo! 25 year old mod hoping to find some 911 threads (ABC show-)

I really wanna try writing out the pair Evan Buckley x Eddie Diaz- quite frankly, it’s been a ship of mine for a few years now! While I am not caught up with the most recent season, I feel as though I could play Buck fairly well.

I will go ahead and say that I want to do some mpreg prompts (more so trans Buck mpreg), and while I don’t have EXACT plots in mind, I’m more then happy to bounce off ideas to each other!

I mainly rp on discord, can use tupper bot too, and set up nice organized servers!

If interested, feel free to like this and I’ll get back to you, or add me on discord at goomy3496

,