#most of the transcription was done by google now

[elle-p]

P3 Club Book pages 25-26 scan and transcription.

ポロニアンモールのモデルとなった、ビーナスフォートの噴水。較べるとホントそっくり。

モノレール内にある、各種ポスター。あやしい「猫茶」なんて商品から、路線図までさまざま。金閣寺をバックにした「二千十年、そうさ、京都行こ」なんてコピーも秀逸。左上のポスターに描かれた男女は、じつは『P3』企画段階で描かれたメインキャラの第一稿だったりする。

Qポロニアンモールやポートアイランドといった、月高生の溜まり場的場所について教えてください。

順 おう、来たな！あのあたりはオレのホームグラウンドだぜい！

チ そういえば、順平と初めて会ったのもポートアイランド駅だっけ。

順 学校もそう��んだけど、人工島にある場所は全部、「新しくできた都市」ってコンセプトで作られてるらしい。ポートアイランド駅前の柱とか、学校と一緒でギリシャ建築風でまとめられてるだろ？

チ 現美にある場所で、モデルになったところはないの？

順 ポートアイランド駅は、晴海トリトンスクウェア。ポロニアンモールは、お台場にある複合ショッピングモール、ビーナスフォートがモデルになってるんだってさ。噴水がある広場なんて、ビーナスフォートにかなりそっくりらしいぜ。ゲーム中は、ポロニアンモールの天井は見ることができねえけど、きっとビーナスフォートみたいに、青空の騙し絵とか描いてあるに違いないぞ。

チ 違いないって······順平、ポロニアンモールの天井、自分で見たことないの？

順 いやー、いつも店の中の商品とか、ゲーセンのゲームとかばっかりに気ぃ取られちまって······上なんてぜんぜん見たことなかった。

チ はぁ······綺麗だから、今度よく見てみるといいわ。

順 あ、でも下はよく見てるぜ！小銭とか落ちてるかもしれないからなっ。そういや、あそこの床って桐の葉のマークが描いてあんだよな。

チ ゲーム本編でも言ってるけど、ポロニアンってのが “桐の葉” って意味だものね。すべて、桐条グループの出資なんでしょ？そういえば、あそこってどういう企業なの？

順 ポートアイランド駅は、晴海トリトンスクウェア。ポロニアンモールは、お台場にある複合ショッピングモール、ビーナスフォートがモデルになってるんだってさ。 噴水があ る広場なんて、ビーナスフォートにかなりそっくりらしいぜ。ゲーム中は、ボロニアンモールの天井は見ることができねえけど、きっとビーナスフォートみたいに、青空の騙し絵とか描いてあるに違いないぞ。

チ 違いないって······順平、ポロニアンモールの天井、自分で見たことないの？

順 いやー、いつも店の中の商品とか、ゲーセンのゲームとかばっかりに気ぃ取られちまって······上なんてぜんぜん見たことなかった。

チ はぁ······綺麗だから、今度よく見てみるといいわ。

順 あ、でも下はよく見てるぜ！小銭とか落ちてるかもしれないからなっ。そういや、あそこの床って相の葉のマークが描いてあんだよな。

チ ゲーム本編でも言ってるけど、ボロニアンってのが“桐の葉”って意味だものね。すべて、 桐条グループの出資なんでしょ？そういえば、あそこってどういう企業なの？

順 えーと、ちょい待てよ。先輩にちゃんと教えてもらったんだ。現在の相条グループってのは、いわゆるホールディングカンパニーであらゆる分野に進出した大企業だけれど、創業当初は機械部品の製造業を営む小さな会社でし······だった、らしい。え、えっと······あとは······。

チ ······アンチョコ読むなら堂々と読みなさいよ。

順 えへへ、悪いな。で、現在中核となっているのは、機械部品製造部門が発展し、現在では最大の規模とシェアを誇る、桐条エレクトロニクスなんだと。つーことはだ。こういうショッピングモールなんかは、メインの業務のかたわらやってるってことだろ？それでこんだけ大きなモール作っちまうんだから、ホントたいしたもんだよなあ。

チ 裏でろくでもないこともやってたんだけどね。

順 まあ、先輩がグループ代表になれば、そういうのもなくなる。

チ だと、いいけどね······。

Qポートアイランド駅のはずれには、天田の家があったということですが、具体的にどの家がそうなんですか？

順 天田も大変だったよなあ。オレも聞いた話だから詳しくは知らねえんだけど、シャドウが暴れ��のと荒垣先輩のペルソナ暴走で、家は全壊しちまってそのま��ま。今は駐車場になっちまった���しい。ゲーム中のマップで言うと、画面の下の方。荒垣先輩がいつも座ってる場所の、真正面に当たる駐車場が、その跡地になるらしい。そっか······先輩いつも、あそこ見てたんだ······。うう、やるせないぜえ。

Qポートアイランド駅と、巌戸台駅を結ぶ新都市交通「あねはづる」は、具体的にどういう路線なの？

順 オレらがいつも通学に使ってるモノレールだな？あれは私鉄で、経営母体はまたもや桐条グループ。人工島の辰巳地区ができてからの、新しい路線つーわけだ。

チ この2駅間を往復するだけの路線なの？途中に駅は？

順 巌戸台とポートアイランドの中間にはほかの駅はなし。だけど、その2駅だけを往復する短線以外にも、巌戸台を超えてさらに先まで行く、直通列車もあるぜ。そうだな、陸のほうを東西に走っている路線があねはづる本線で、巌戸台一ポートアイランド間は単なる分ってわけだ。駅の表示をよーく見ると、すんごい小さいけど付近の路線図があるのが分かるんじゃねえかな？

チ もしかしてオープニングムービーで、順平のところの本物リーダーが乗ってた電車って······。

順 そうだな、あれがあねはづるの本線ってことになるよな。つか、わざわざ「本物」って言うなつーの。

Q巌戸台近辺は、ポートアイランド側とくらべて雰囲気がずいぶん落ち着いてますが、実在のモデルは？

順 確かに落ち着いてて馴染みやすい街だもんな。これは、かなり本物と似てるんだぜ～。

チ やっぱりモデルがあるの？

順 駅前側は、ゆりかもめの新橋駅前がモデル。美術スタッフの取材の成果がバッチリって感じだぜ。で、商店街側のモデルは、JR新橋駅前のとあるビルなどを参考にしたらしい。詳しいビル名は内緒だけど、戸台と同じようにたくさん店が入ったビルがあって、そこにある「つばめグリル」って店は、キャラクターデザインの副島さんオススメの店だと。くぅ～、食ってみてえ！

チ 巌戸台といえば、駅前でいつも工事をやってるわよね？あれはいつになったら完成するの？

順 あー、あそこはな、多分しばらくは完成しないんじゃねえかなあ。

チ 工事が中断してるの？

順 駅前再開発で、また色々な店ができるはずだったんだけどさ、地面掘り返してたら埋蔵金が出てきちまったらしいんだ。遺跡とか埋まってたら工事できないから現在調査中。

順 ああ······オレのまだ見ぬトンカツよ、ハンバーグよ、カレーライスよ！早く出ておいで~。

チ って、期待してると、ブティック��かアクセサリー屋とかしかできなかったりするのよね。

順 うおっ、ありうる······。

Q巌戸台には、あずきちゃんや、ワイルダック、あと名前がわからない謎のヒーローなど色々なマスコットがいますが、詳細が知りたいです。

順 おお、通好みの質問だな？つか、細かいところまで見てるな~。

チ あずきちゃんには、企画段階ではテーマソングがあったって聞いたんだけど、本当？

順 ホントなんだよこれが。つかテーマソングつーより······呪文？調べると延々と、「あーずきしゃきしゃき、あーずきしょかしょか」って歌い続けるという······。

チ 都市伝説みたいね······。

順 まあ、ボツってありがたいような聞いてみたかったような。

チ ワイルダックはわりと目立ってるし、まあマスコットキャラ以上の隠し設定はなさそうだけど、その構にいるビニール人形は？

順 あれこそが、ワイルダックバー ガーから生まれた次世代ヒーロー！その名も、ワイルドヒーロー！世界を股にかける彼の活躍が銀幕で見られる、映画『ワイルドヒーローネバーダイ』近日公開予定！

チ ······今、作って言ってるんじゃないでしょうね？

順 んなことねえって！ほら、モノレールの中に貼ってあるポスタ一見てみろよ。

チ あ、映画のポスター······本物？

順 そーいうこと。

チ 凝っているというか、スタッフの人も暇と言うか。

順 それは言わねえでくれ······。

Q巌戸台商店街の左隣にある空き地は、不動産屋の看板が調べられますが、ここは何か意味があるの？

順 おっと、これは際どい質問が来やがったなー？

チ ん？何際どいの？

順 じつはこの看板、とあるボツになったイベントに関わってるものなのだよ、チドリくん。

チ ボツイベント？

順 企画の初期段階でな、ボロニアンモールに宝くじ売り場を置くって案があって、最高で3億当たる予定だったんだと。ただ、いくら大金もらっても、使い道がないとユーザーも面白くないだろ？だから、もし1等を当てたら、あの看板の不動産屋で土地と家が買える、ってイベントがあったわけよ。残して欲しかったよなあ······寮より自由な、門限も何もない自由な生活！

チ 主人公君にしか当たらないんだから関係ないでしょ？

順 くそっ、女は夢がねえぜ。

Q聞くのも恥ずかしいですが、白河町のラブホテルはモデルがあるのですか？もしかして······スタッフの方は取材に行ったりしたんですか？

順 おお、オレと同じ魂の輝きを持つ人からの質問だぜっ！

チ ······さいてー。

順 い、いや、これはあくまで男のロマン······。

チ ······さいてー。

順 しくしくしくしくしく。

真田明彦 (以下「真」) という訳で、邪な心に流されないこの俺が、ここから順平に替わって説明しよう。

チ ······どこから湧いたのこの人？

桐条美鶴 (以下「美」) 明彦、 様はもう少しぐらい、煩悩を増やしたほうがいいと思うのだが。朴念仁も過ぎると害だぞ？

チ もしかしてあなたたち、ずっと出番待ってた、とか？

真 さて、さっそく質問に回答していこうじゃないか！

チ ······図星。

美 で、白河町のモデルは何だ？

真 まあ待て、美鶴。ここは、ちょっと他の場所とは違って、じつに粋な形でモデルを選んでるんだ。まず白河通りという地名の由来は、飛騨高山にある白川郷なんだ。

美 白川郷というと、世界遺産の合掌造りの民家で有名な？ラブホテル街とまったく関係ないじゃないか。

真 ところが、関係あるんだよ。白川郷近郊では、昭和初期に連続したダム建設の影響で、水没する村が続出することとなった。だが、そこで白川郷を追われた村人たちは、ど こへ行ったと思う？彼らは、東京の渋谷へと住処を移し、新たな生活を始めたんだ。さらに詳しく言うと、移住先は渋谷の、円山町だ。

美 円山町というと、確か東京でも有名なラブホテル街のひとつ······なるほど、エクセレントだ明彦！

真 そう、白河通りのモデルは渋谷の円山町、そして地名の由来は現在の円山町を支える人々のルーツ白川郷。そんな、奥の深い理由で白河 通りのラブホテル街はできている んだ。ちなみに、直接取材には行かず、インターネットのサイトをあちこち見て、内装とかは作ったそうだ。

チ 変なテンション······。大丈夫かな······この人たち······。

順 感動したっ！！

チ わ、順平っ？

順 感動したっすよ、真田先輩っ！

真 そうか、わかるか順平！

順 この感動を分かち合うため、今また先輩取り巻きの女の子連れて、白河通りに行きましょうっ！！

真 ああ、いいとも順平！

美 ······ブフダイン。

チ ······ガルーラジェム。

美 敵は総崩れだ！一掃する！

チ 分かりやすすぎだよ、順平。(ボカスカボカスカボカスカ······)

真・順 ご、ごめんなさい······。

美・チ 分かれば、よろしい。

よく見ると、ちゃんと「3億円」と売値 が書かれている。

影時間にしか行けないラブホテル。コミュイベントなどで、行く���を夢見た人も多いかも？

[purplealmonds]

Continuing to fire on all cylinders to make this Sky 🤝Mononoke collab a reality! 🐲⚖️🌊

Process GIFs and artist commentary below the cut. ⬇️

Left: Process GIF Middle: Just the background, cos I really like how it looks! Right: Illustration without the collab logo

And here are my notes on my inspirations and references. There's a lot of 'em, so instead of embedding relevant images one by one I put them in a callout sheet! For accessibility, I also included transcript (with bonus ramblings) below each sheet.

Ofuda circle modeled in Google Sketchup 2017, then lightly transformed in Photoshop to flare out. I tried my best to hand-draw these, but it the results came out really clunky and stiff. I figured if Mononoke shamelessly utilizes 3D in their show, I can too!

Krill and sky kid composition roughly inspired by the Ayakashi DVD cover illustration. On the surface level, the krill's black-and-red color scheme mirrored that of the bake-neko. Not to mention, in the world of Sky, the krill would be the best fit of a mononoke-like entity. The red background is also a nod to the red skies seen during a shard eruption in Sky.

Sky kid gesture based on the Festival Spin Dancer's Tier 3 poses and the Medicine Seller's iconic pose in the Zakishiwarahi episode as inspiration. This was the idea which springboarded this illustration into existence. I wanted to do my take of the Medicine Seller's pose, but in a more dynamic manner: rotate the pose to a profile position and set the ofuda in a diagonal, flared out arrangement.

Cape inspired by tenbin design featured in the 2024 Mononoke movie. This one's an interesting one - I wanted the cape to be a stiff material that doesn't "flap" when in flight - similar to the Aurora wing capes. It ended up looking like a kite of sorts, which I'm not entirely opposed to! I haven't had the opportunity to showcase the back view of this cape design, but I envision it having some mechanical aspects to it - the "wing" which are flared out in this illustration fold in like moth wings, and a little bell is attached to the "tail" part and it jingles a little whenever the sky kid flaps!

Bandana is based on the Scaredy Cadet's hairstyle from the Season of Assembly. Mask design utilizes the 2023 Days of Style mask and the Nintendo Pack mask as bases. Pretty self-explanatory. I basically went onto the Sky wiki and found the cosmetics that most closely matched what I was looking for. Then if necessary, I went to the Office space to do photoshoots to get the appropriate camera angles for them all.

Seasonal pendant inspired by the classic Medicine Seller's necklace and the eye motif featured in the 2024 Mononoke movie. Possibly the only one-to-one homage to the classic Medicine Seller design here, but his garnet necklace was too good of a match to the seasonal pendant. A side tangent: does the new Medicine Seller possess a necklace, let alone a mirror? So far all the shots of him don't feature it. Fascinating.

Dark dragon krill anatomy references a custom figurine crafted by @/escaflowne_n07 on Twitter. Until I found this, I was honestly at a loss finding reference for this - be it on the internet or during in-game photoshoots. The lighting on the krill in-game focused on its menacing silhouette rather than its structure. And not to mention, getting a close-up shot almost always set off the dark creature's aggro. I have no idea how this guy found the references to put this model together - well done!

Mantas, elder constellations, and sun dog references murals in the Cave of Prophecy. Krill aside, the overall illustration was leaning a little too much towards Mononoke so I tried finding opportunities to insert more Sky into it. Added bonus is that now there's storytelling in the background: during a shard eruption, a giant krill rises from the frothing waves of dark water to hunt down a flock of mantas.

Clouds behind the sun dog reference the ones featuring heavily in the Umibozu episode. This illustration has a lot of ocean theming, so I figured this would be appropriate.

Rendering style of the background is lightly inspired by the 2007 Mononoke illustration. Mainly having a 2D inked style to contrast with the more polished render of the sky kid. Funnily enough, this was a tertiary inspiration, which lead to the discovery in the next point!

Dark water waves and sun dog composition heavily references Hokusai's "The Great Wave". The waves were modified to be bottle-green of the Golden Wasteland's dark waters. The sun dog is in the spot where Mt. Fuji is in the original composition. these were all hand-drawn by the way! I merely emulated the style of the source material. As a side note, I also borrowed the spotted sea spray rendering for the krill's red spotlight.

Background pattern taken from the ofuda design featured in the 2024 Mononoke movie poster. Mainly to add some gritty texture to the sky. I worked pretty hard to replicate this ofuda design as a high-res asset so I wanted to use it more!

[matchalovertrait]

The day after Caruso posted his video, Dulce responded with one of her own to disprove his false claims about the "stolen" recipes. She brought up her extensive list of culinary experiences and screenshots of everything related to the cookbook when it was in progress. However, the damage had been done. Too many people turned their backs on Dulce. As everything came crashing down, she slowly stopped responding to her family and friends. Of course, everyone was alarmed. You can't just not respond like that out of the blue, especially when you're overseas! Now that Ángel and Esperanza have come to save the day, Dulce is looking to sue Caruso for defamation. I did say to never get into legal trouble with her! This marks the rebirth of Alegría VS Caruso!

Note: I am getting political here. As Election Day in the United States is around the corner, I urge people to fact-check everything. I'm seeing too many people on other social media platforms not doing the proper research. They see a video of one thing and take it as the sole truth. It seems like people have forgotten how to use Google, which is right at our fingertips. Make sure you're looking at reliable sources!

Transcript:

Dulce: I swear! That better not be him. A lot of people didn’t believe me or they didn’t bother to watch my explanation video. How am I supposed to recover from this?

Ángel: Dulce!

Dulce: Ángel and Esperanza?!

Ángel: Why haven’t you been answering anyone’s phone calls or texts??? It’s been 2 days.

Dulce: My career is over. My numbers are plummeting. People are crossing out my name on my cookbook and writing his name instead. Clients are canceling bookings with me. His crazy fans are giving me fake bad reviews. I’m through.

Esperanza: So what? It hasn’t been that long. Things can pick back up, Dulce. Why don’t you get your chef friends to vouch for you?

Dulce: I don’t want to rope anyone into my mess..

Esperanza: [Sighs] You know what? It’s sad to see you like this. Aren’t you going to plot something?

Dulce: I’ve done enough harm as it is! What do I do??? Sue him??? Oh wait, I already thought of that! I looked into it and no good lawyer wants to take the case. They’d rather represent actual stars like Judith Ward. I need to take this as a sign and finally grow up.

Ángel: C’mon, you know you want to do it.

Dulce: You’re encouraging it...? You don’t want to teach me a valuable life lesson like always?

Ángel: I think you learned your lesson. Make him learn his now.

Esperanza: My dad and Hilary both said they can help you pay for a REALLY good defamation lawyer. I think Hilary was freaking out the most about you not answering.

Ángel: Well, we all kinda were. You had Ama worried sick. But we didn’t file a missing person’s report because your friend came by and saw you well alive through your window.

Dulce: Oh, man. Dani probably got nervous and ran off. She never came to knock on the door.

Ángel: She’s a skittish one, isn’t she?

Dulce: Yeah, I have to apologize to her for not responding to her texts either. She knows about everything, but she might feel like she’s annoying me because I haven’t answered.

Esperanza: Wait, isn’t she a paralegal?

Dulce: Oh my gosh, you’re right! How’d I forget that? She might know someone who can help!

Ángel: Looks like we have a plan, then.

Esperanza: Um, I think part of this plan should be helping you clean up this place. Go put detergent in the washer, Ángel. I’ll get the clothes.

Dulce: My clothes??? Oh, no. They’ve been washed and dried. I just haven’t put them away. The only mess here is in my mind.

[mpchev]

Update on fanbinding dissertation: more typesetting, more test prints, more guillotines!

I’ve now spent 23 hours learning how to fanbind! Having SO MUCH FUN, despite the tiny bit of panic that has started to settle in — everything else also takes a lot of time, and these fanbinding hours could have been spent reading more of the abundant fanbinding / fan studies / folklore research, or working on transcriptions, or getting some writing done. Going for equal parts of “it’s all about balance” and “fuck it we ball”.

I ordered some supplies from Ratchford a few days ago — I’ll need to order some more because I was mid flare-up when I did it, so brain was mush and I forgot a bunch of things, but! I now have enough supplies to do some of the next steps.

My new best friend the blue guillotine from the last update? Not such a good friend after all, test signatures were very uneven. Mentioned I was looking for an alternative to one of my profs, and he lent me his own! (Thanks Tom!) It is also blue, I’ll miss it dearly when I have to give it back. Walking around campus casually carrying a guillotine made me feel like the most interesting person in the world, many opportunities for French revolution jokes, highly recommend.

Spent a day at the library finishing up the typesetting, and doing some more printing and cutting tests. With the actual fic on the page instead of the SFW version, so here’s a title reveal if you squint (I’m binding 5 short fics together, had to come up with something). Was worried about regular printer paper looking way too blue-white for a book, but that printer had recycled paper as an option and it looks so much better. Huge thanks to Kait for the moral support, the carrying of the guillotine when I couldn’t, and the pictures of me doing things.

Spent the night making a punching cradle out of millboard (using embroidery scissors as an x-acto knife?! do not recommend) and PVA glue, after seeing someone else posting about how easy it was. (Now, is it somewhat functional? Yes. Should I maybe have googled it a little instead of just eyeballing it in a trance state of Must Do Something Now? Also yes. Later found a great youtube video of what I should have done instead, might give it a go later.) Then punched some holes (so far, feels like I didn’t need to get an awl/my awl is way too big, but we’ll see), and then sown my two more test signatures, one with more embroidery floss and one with the linen thread I now have. Something feels a bit off in the very-thin linen thread + recycled paper + big awl + wonky punching cradle combo, not sure which one to blame, probably a bit of everything. The collection of test signatures keeps on growing!

Went back to the library the following day, printed one more test signature (in case the printer had decided to grow a new personality overnight), and then the two copies of the actual book! Sliced all the sheets in half, put them in the right order, folded the pages, arranged them into signatures, and sliced them to the actual size. Thought I messed up by folding the signatures before cutting them to size, but that turned out to be a better way to do it. They look SO GOOD and SO REAL, I am SO HAPPY, this is SO SATISFYING, I desperately want to learn how to make paperbacks next to carry them everywhere. Also want to bind bigger books. Look at that happy autoethnography face.

Next steps: sewing the signatures, getting the missing supplies, attacking the terrifying ordeal of casing those bitches.

[remy2fang]

F.A.N.G's super LONG Shadaloo PR monologue on the Official Street Fighter V website (Japanese and Desktop only). He talks about a myriad of things that include the purpose of the website, the Four Heavenly Kings, the Dolls, other members of Shadaloo, food, some SFV gaming advice, himself, and so much more. This started in 2016, but it had updates. Thankfully, ryo_redcyclone compiled the entire transcript of the updated version onto this page.

I used Google Translate for this. Apologies if some of the translations look weird. I broke it down to smaller paragraphs, otherwise the entire thing is basically a very big block of text lol. Also, you’ll notice that F.A.N.G says desu a lot. Normally it’s spelled です (is/am/are/to be, usually a sentence ender) in hiragana, but the way he said it is デス in katakana. This is a play on words. He is still using desu, but he is also saying the English word “death” (he’s a poisonous assassin and mad scientist after all). In SF6, A.K.I. also emulates her master’s speech pattern in the Japanese version. She too says desu in デス 💜💜.

Anyway, here’s the translation:

——

Nishishi! Everyone of Shadaloo army, how are you? It's your reliable boss, Lord F.A.N.G.

The Shadaloo C.R.I., also known as the Shadaloo Combat Research Institute, has been renewed. It's a calm and stylish atmosphere in white. I love Lord Bison’s psycho power and purple, which is the color of poison (I also like pink). With the emphasis on visibility, I made it white, with great heartache and even shredding my intestines. Feeling like your intestines are being ripped apart is a powerful expression. It hurts, it hurts so much. It's better to be poisoned than to be slashed. The poison handled by I, Lord F.A.N.G, is something I learned in special training since I was young. Metals other than gold are said to melt! Nho ho ho ho, isn’t it amazing? Moreover, you can take poison in and out freely! ( But I'm always releasing a little bit at a time, so my cell phone and other things are made of pure gold). In other words, I, Lord F.A.N.G, is the most treacherous and strongest. Oh, the strongest is Lord Bison.

And this time, at the Shadaloo CRI, you can find out the usage rate of characters in online matches. The usage rate of those who belong to Shadaloo is skyrocketing! As for Lord Bison, the usage rate is over 200%. You can understand even if you don't see it. Mr. Balrog is about 2%. After all, it's hard being a popular character. We have no choice but to make the world better with the power of Shadaloo! And then the diagram is counted on a monthly basis. The counting is done manually by low-ranking Shadaloo soldiers under the orders of F.A.N.G. ...That's a lie. What is a diagram in the first place? To explain to those who say, it is a research site made by the Shadaloo Information Department that is full of the knowledge of the world: According to Shadopedia, the aggregated information was visualized in two dimensions with an expression model such as graphs and tables. In other words, the strong one is on top and the weak one is on the bottom. However, it is not a visualization of the performance of the character. It's calculated based on which character is winning "around the world" during "this period." Don't give up even if you're at the bottom. As long as everyone uses it and win, that's fine, desu.

Well, today, I'm going to work hard on training while having beef stew with shakko power extract! The CRI itself is also scheduled to evolve every day. It's good to check it every day. The central part of this Shadaloo secret base is where I am now, I update it from here. Oh, those beautiful statues you see behind me... From the right, there’s the "World's Strongest Number 2”, that’s me. Next is claw-man, a cruel narcissist with a really bad character. Lord Bison, the perfect ruler who was born to conquer the world! And finally, the boxing man, desu. I will update the information from time to time from this majestic room. The electricity at the Shadaloo base is mostly made up of geothermal power sources. It's ecological, desu! Shadaloo’s slogan is “Easy on Earth”! That's why this room is quite hot. This place will also be for daily training.

Endurance is perseverance! That’s it, desu. Endure after having poisoned your enemy! Brilliantly dodge the opponent's attack so that you won't be beaten! This is the true value of F.A.N.G-style martial arts. If you don't get hit, you won't lose, so that's how it is. I guess it's a different character in this work where offense is important. A database that aggregates information on all kinds of fighters around the world. Uhihihi, there’s all we know and don’t know about that fighter, that damned female detective, that muscular wrestler, some rolled beard from a former royal family, a guy with a hairstyle like an eryngii mushroom, and a person who stretches his hands. Of course, we can also find information about Shadaloo from here. If you know them and know yourself, you will never be defeated in a hundred battles. It's good to work hard to achieve Lord Bison’s ambitions. That device, that plan, and if you have this powerful database, conquering the world will be easy as taking candy from a baby. It is, desu.

Speaking of rice before breakfast, have you finished your meal yet? Now I'm doing a beef stew fair at Shadaloo Cafeteria on the 13th basement floor. I like beef stew a lot. As I said earlier, I've already eaten twice today. Finished eating. It seems that it will be full of energy with psycho power. After eating, it's good to take a good rest before going to the training facility.

It's good to train your energy and physical strength at the 48th room of the Shadaloo training ground. Don't neglect your daily efforts to create trust and achievements. If you live a lazy life with plenty of time, you will become an incompetent person like that Balrog. I still can't believe that such a guy is the Four Heavenly Kings. Lord Bison should also reconsider this. Is the punch power the best in the world? I, the invincible Lord F.A.N.G, could melt such a thing with poison! I don't like the bastard who wears a mask. I can't forgive the attitude of looking down on people! In the first place, he doesn’t have enough loyalty to Lord Bison! Only by serving Lord Bison is a true Shadaloo soldier. I think people have to respect each other. Now, you are also aiming to be the strongest Shadaloo soldier at the CRI!

If you have time, it's good to earn fight money in story mode and unlock additional characters. No matter who ever comes, I, Lord F.A.N.G, am and always will be invincible; this won’t change! In other words, I'm Number 1!! ・・・・・・ Oh, Lord Bison is Number 1, so I'm Number 2! I’m the strongest and invincible Number 2, desu! Wow, that was close. It would bring me bad luck....

Hmm? How can I become strong? That's a simple thing, it's good to master the poisonous hand. My V-Skill, Nishodoku, is unblockable. Are you surprised? To be honest, I was also surprised. It flies slowly, so you can chase it and use it as a check. It's good to take away the opponent's physical strength and keeping them from reaching you with Nishikyu or a Sotoja. Hmm? Isn't that what you mean? What do you mean! If you don't want to learn poison, you can play against opponents from all over the world in an online match! It's the best way to get stronger in the actual battle! Of course, it's better to collect information about the characters before fighting. It's more interesting to grasp not only the characters but also the habits and characteristics of the opponent, and you can fight advantageously. The CRI is for you, a rookie Shadaloo soldier! If you have this, you can advance into a top-class Shadaloo soldier!

I'm going to explain about Shadaloo, to which we belong, here. I'm sure you know that it's a secret society that works behind the scenes all over the world, but there are also many excellent engineers and programmers. I'm working hard for the effective use of psycho power and world peace. In addition to weapons development, we are also conducting experiments that maximize human power and food development that does not expire at all. The salary is paid in the dedicated currency ZENNY.

In order to work on conquering the world with peace in mind, we are preparing all uniforms and residences in Shadaloo. Speaking of uniforms, it is a characteristic shoulder armor, desu. It is a thing that imitates Lord Bison’s costume. All are color coordinated. There is a color change once every 4 years. It was just the timing of the switch this year, so it's a refreshing blue. Before that, it was a chic brown, mustard-like color. A hat that goes well with the uniform is prepared. Lower-ranking soldiers are required to wear helmets during their duties. It is possible to protect the head and temporarily strengthen the body with a psycho power receiver. A stylish red beret is prepared outside the mission. I'm sure it will look good on you too. Red is the color of passion! It's Lord Bison’s color!

Speaking of missions, Shadaloo soldiers sometimes fight. Hitting, kicking, throwing, and poisoning are scary, aren't they? But! Even if you are like that, if you are learning Shadaloo-style martial arts, you will do a great job! From a posture that looks harmless for a moment, a powerful tackle, and a flowing cooperation technique, an alarming sharp punch, this combo is the legendary [Shadaloo Punch] desu. In addition, with eyes like a dead fish, let the opponent off guard and rise at once while rotating (there is no attack judgment here) A heavy kick like stepping on a falling coin. This is [Shadaloo Kick] desu. It's a must-have technique for the intermediate promotion exam, so it's good to practice well.

Speaking of Lord Bison’s aides that I remembered in the battle, in addition to the Four Kings and I, the magnificent Lord F.A.N.G, there are also his elite female body guards called the Dolls. They have a special combat training, so they are quite skilled. If you have the chance, it's a good idea to practice with them. I'm going to explain the members.

First of all, the one with the pink curls. [Enero] She is the leader and her role is to plan special missions and give instructions to other members. She can also fight, so it seems that she often go to the battlefield and take direct command. She’s good at copying vocal cords, and she can confuse the enemy. She has a lot of pride, so she sometimes have trouble handling it.

Next is [Février] She’s in charge of firearms who skillfully use two submachine guns. She has a very foul mouth, so you'd better be careful. You can never win if you have a sting. It's a waste of time. Her hair and glasses are the charm points.

[März] She is good at information manipulation and cyber attacks. She can't physically fight, but she seems to more than compensate with that. It's scary when this type gets angry. Actually, boxing in secret (exercise?) It seems that she was doing it.

[Aprile] She carries a medical kit and is in charge of providing first aid to her comrades. I, Lord F.A.N.G, have bestowed upon her a finely developed neurotoxin, so that in case of danger she can use the poison and attack. She's originally from Italy and apparently did rhythmic gymnastics, so they took notice of her and snatched her up! That’s scary! Kidnapping is bad!

[Satsuki] Japanese samurai-style fighter desu. The combat power is Number 1 for the Dolls. The sharpness of her beloved samurai sword blade is amazing. Well, if it comes to me, I'll melt the whole sword with poison. Actually, she is also good at taijutsu, and she has the technique of grabbing her opponent, jumping to the sky and hitting the ground. It's a sub-style technique of the hooligan combination, and it's pretty cool. She also does sliding.

[Juli] She’s a combatant who uses a sniping arrow. It seems that a lot of things happened in the previous work, but she has returned safely to Shadaloo and participated in the conquest of the world.

[Santamu] This is a member who is good at fighting with spears. Because she has good eyesight, she can look over the enemy from high ground and carry out the mission efficiently. The Golden Lion Tamarin, Kiki, is like her partner. It seems that she likes animals and is heartbroken to exploit Kiki, but it is unavoidable in this world and for Lord Bison.

[Xiayu] and [Jianyu] are twins. It appears to me that the one fighting with nunchakus and sporting a classical Chinese Opera face paint is Xiayu, while Jianyu is the one that fights with acrobatics wielding a stick; I tend to confuse them often. Seems to be good at combination techniques, desu. It's kind of sneaky.

[Noembelu] She’s the powerhouse of the Dolls. She is equipped with two one-handed axes. The attack of holding an axe in both hands and slashing while rotating is intense. She’s a quiet person with few words. It seems that growing vegetables is her hobby, so she provides a corner of the rooftop of the base and is making a vegetable garden. Also, she seems to be good at making dolls.

Finally, [Decapre] She is a fighter who is most strongly influenced by Lord Bison's psycho power, desu. Does she hate the former Doll Killer Bee? I would like to know. I don't know anything about their past, so I can't say anything. It seems that the mask had a minor change.

..Well, I'm really lucky to be working at Shadaloo with such unique members. I should feel honored. With Lord Bison's blessing, I'll be sure to continue the quest for world domination.. Please invite your friends as well. It's good to learn what you don't understand at the CRI. Everyone gets along well, let’s do world conquest! For the sake of the wonderful Lord Bison. Yes, yes, I remember!

Let me tell you one thing. Why don’t I, Lord F.A.N.G, have a holiday costume? Is the Chinese girl’s costumes popular? Is the curled hair lady's swimsuit popular? Oh dear, desu. There are shirts with bird (flamingo) patterns during summer vacations and my favorite purple sleepwears, so why don't they release those?! There's no mistake in selling explosively, but I don't understand!

——

There’s also an older version from 2016 which was translated in English by Miðgarðsorm. It’s the 11th post. Because this one’s older, it’s shorter and have less content than the updated one from above. But there are some interesting differences. Instead of mentioning his favorite food being beef stew, F.A.N.G said he doesn’t like curry that much. Now you know his food preferences 😄😄.

This neat feature reveals a lot about F.A.N.G’s character, sentiments, and how his poison works all in a fun and upbeat way. And isn’t it neat that he ran and updated the website himself too (according to website lore)? But I wonder how he feels every time he sees himself at the bottom for character usage? 😅😅. I think that this type of content was meant to make F.A.N.G into an endearing character. He gives some gaming tips and words of encouragement to the player, something that wasn’t present in SFV as he would often belittle or threaten anyone that isn’t Bison. The website gives us a friendlier portrayal of F.A.N.G, which I think contributed a slightly positive-leaning perception of him in Japan as oppose to the rest of the world. Seeing things like this, I wish it was translated for the English version of the website. This type of supportive personality from him was transferred into SF6 when he’s providing medical advice. I didn’t understand why F.A.N.G was so oddly “helpful” and “kind” in SF6 at first (even if it’s just to gain something he wants), but now it makes sense when looking back at this old gem. I wonder if F.A.N.G talks to A.K.I. like this when she’s training and studying under him? I wouldn’t be surprised if he did and it’s no wonder A.K.I. loves him. I can imagine him giving her exercise and educational tips while encouraging her to do her best and never to give up 💜😄💜😄.

And I just love how F.A.N.G complained that all of the cool DLC costumes go to Chun-Li. Like yeah, a lot of people actually did share his sentiments on that lol. But it’s Chun-Li. She is the face of Street Fighter along with Ryu.

[genderlessbleach]

GENERATION LOSS FANS RISE UP!!

I am currently trying to make a GenLoss transcript! I want to get it as detailed as I possibly can with (physical) descriptions for every character and room, transcribed videos from the Generation Loss YouTube channel, and possibly the game as well! I personally want to start this project as an easier way to collect small speech details to put into fics.

I don't need any help on this, but I'm willing to get feedback and corrections if something seems wrong. This post is more so just to see if I have anyone interested in using the transcripts or if I'm just too silly for this world.

(This would be posted on Ao3 if anyone was wondering)

Anyways thank you,

Bleach <3

EDIT: I am currently thinking about making a website for the transcript or finding a different website that specializes in transcripts for this. Making a website seems like the easiest option as of now, but I'd need to look into costs and such to make it possible. Thank you for all the support in just one day <3

Thank you again,

Bleach

6/16/24 With The Founders Cut out now and me having taken a hiatus on this project to focus on school, I am now going to ask for help from my fellow boobers for this project! Due to the hiatus, I was only able to get most of The Spirit of the Cabin done. I will be posting a Google form for anyone who would like to be in the trenches with me.

[azuremist]

Alterhumanity and Autism (Script)

During my panel at this year's Othercon, I said that I would publicly post my panel's script, and my survey's results onto my tumblr, for easy archival purposes! (There is no way to submit Google Docs to archive.org that I'm aware of...)

This is the panel's script! What I said before the QnA part of the panel. Once the panel recording is uploaded, I'll reblog with the link to it, as well! The results for the survey will also be posted to this account shortly.

Here is the blurb that I originally wrote for the panel, on the schedule:

"This panel aims to explore the relationship between autism and alterhumanity, by looking at the history, the modern autistic community and what real alterhumans have to say on the topic. Why it is that neurodivergency is seemingly so common in the alterhuman community? Is it correlation, causation, or perhaps something in between?"

And, below is the script itself!

Hi, everyone! I am so excited to be speaking at Othercon this year and I hope everyone else is enjoying the 'con so far. My name is Azure! You may also call me Bede, as I answer to both. I like he/him, she/her and bun/buns pronouns, and I am a multitude of things! I am a demon (a fallen angel if you wanna get technical), and my main fictotype is, you'll never guess who based off my names, Bede from Pokemon. Shoutout to any Pokemonkin listening. I've been active in the alterhuman community for around 5 years now, and was the head and sole mod of ‘From Fictionkind’, which is a zine released in 2022, aiming to explore the experiences of those who have a fiction-based identity. If you are interested, you can download it here. (Send link)

I am a grab bag of disorders and disabilities, most of which I won't list, but what is relevant to this panel is that I am, in fact, autistic. Not only that, but I have done, by all metrics, way too much research into autism, and I am an autistic activist!

To preface: although this panel is going to specifically namedrop and talk about autism a lot, I am sure that a lot of different beings can relate to what I am going to talk about today. Not just other neurodivergencies and disabilities, either. Much of what I am going to be talking about today could resonate with any oppressed being's experiences. I welcome all discussion about the similarities of different experiences with open arms!

But, for the sake of transparency, I am not very good at talking off the cuff. So I am going to spend the bulk of this panel reading from a pre-prepared script. If anyone is interested in a transcript, it is available on Google Docs for viewing! I will send it in the panel chat right now, so that anyone who needs to may read along, for word-processing purposes. (Send link) This also means that I am not going to be looking at the chat a whole lot, so if there's something you'd particularly like for me to see, I encourage you to hold it until the end so that I can be sure to see it and give it the thought and recognition that it deserves. All this being said, I still will be looking at the chat occasionally.

To prepare for this panel, I took a survey polling autistic alterhumans, which was taking responses from March 7th to July 1st, so around 4 months. I was hoping for about maybe 90 participants, but that number was blown out of the water with over 500 responses!! I will be going over those results later on in the panel, and will also be referencing the anonymous freeform responses.

The very last point of my preamble here is to warn that this panel may not be suitable for all audiences. This lecture contains extended discussion of ableism, and, while I try to keep the mentions brief, there will be specific talk of disabled folks, including children, being hurt. If you're unable to handle that at this time, that is absolutely fine. Take care of yourself and have a great con!

This panel aims to explore the relationship between autism and alterhumanity, by looking at the history, the modern autistic community and what real alterhumans have to say on the topic. I hope to, perhaps not explain, but look into why it is that neurodivergency is seemingly so common in the alterhuman community, and whether it's because of correlation, causation, or perhaps something in between.

Now, let's start off with a question and feel free to try and guess: What do fairies, aliens, and crystals all have in common? Do we have any guesses?

The correct answer is that all 3 of these things have been used to try and claim autistic children are nonhuman!

Let's get into the specifics, starting from the top with fairies.

The changeling is a form of fairy found in European folklore. Also referred to as an "oaf" historically, a changeling is a fairy that is left in the place of an identical human child, when they are stolen away by other fairies. This is to say, parents believed that their human child was being replaced by an identical fairy child. There were multiple tricks that were thought to fend this off. When you believe you already have a changeling, though... There were less ways to go about that. Historical records and tales about changelings unfortunately imply that the solution chosen for a changeling child was often times infanticide.

Many modern psychologists now believe that most tales of changelings developed in an attempt to explain disabled children. This includes, but is not limited to, deformities, Down syndrome, Williams syndrome, cerebral palsy, and, of course, autism. The fact that boys are more often born with birth defects lines up with the touted belief that boys were more likely to be taken by fairies.

Furthermore, see "regressive autism". This so-called phenomena occurs when a child appears to develop, quote-unquote, "normally", until they start showing symptoms of autism in their later years. Now, what actually happens in these cases is that they never noticed their child's autistic traits until those later years. But the fact that there is still a name for this sudden perceived shift in an autistic child shows the sheer amount of cases there are like this, even today. Now, imagine how bad it was hundreds of years ago, before we even had a word for autism. This "sudden shift" perspective very much parallels the supposed markings of your child being replaced by a changeling.

Second verse, same as the first: aliens. Although the term "starseed" has been picked up in the alterhuman community as a way to describe one's self as an alien, "starseeds", or "star children", didn't originate in the alterhuman community. Their existence is a theory put forth by Brad Seiger in his 1976 book, titled "Gods of Aquarius". It posits that some humans originated as extraterrestrials, and arrived on Earth through either birth or by taking over an existent human body.

Generally agreed-upon signs that you or someone you love is a starseed, according to believers, include that person feeling like they don't belong, being hyperempathetic (which is a sign of autism, despite what the stereotypes would have you believe), introversion, and... Actually, I'm going to quote this in its entirety. In "What Is A Starseed & 50 Clear Signs You Are One", published by The Spirit Nomad, the first listed sign is, quote, "You are highly sensitive. You easily feel overwhelmed and drained when you are in a place with many people and with intense stimuli – like shopping malls, clubs, and networking events. You might also be sensitive to stimulants like coffee, alcohol and even dark chocolate." Endquote.

You think I'm joking about these things just listing autism symptoms. I'm not!

Finally... Crystals. Crystal children and indigo children are both believed to be sort of the next step in scientific evolution, according to New Age circles. More specifically, crystal children are the newest generation, while indigo children were the first wave, from around the 70s to the 90s. I'll just be calling both of these 'waves' crystal children for the sake of simplicity, but know that they are just two waves of the same thing. Crystal children are believed to possess special or supernatural abilities, such as telepathy. Autistic children having telepathy, as we all know, is the plot of Mob Psycho 100.

Signs that your child is a crystal child include high empathy, being perceived as 'strange' by others or intelligent for their age (see the autistic gifted kid phenomenon), and being sensitive to the point of fussing in crowded spaces. It's also said that crystal children may struggle in socially conventional schools, because of their dislike of rigid authority, being smarter than their teachers, and their lack of response to guilt, fear, or manipulation-based discipline. (Read: indirect communication.)

It is actually a noted phenomenon that many parents, when confronted with a diagnosis like a learning disability, ADHD, or autism, will alternatively label their child as a crystal child. Autism researcher Mitzi Waltz noted this phenomenon, and spoke about it in a 2009 issue of The Journal of Religion, Disability & Health. He suggests that parents recategorize autistic symptoms as telepathic powers to attempt to reconceptualize these autistic traits as a part of a more conventionally positive identity. He also puts into words why this can be harmful, stating that parents could refuse to acknowledge their child's impairments, refuse accommodations, and, quote, "transmit belief systems to the child that are self-aggrandizing, confusing, or potentially frightening." Endquote.

Believe it or not, there are actually MORE examples of myths or conspiracy theories that attempt to explain autistic children as nonhuman. But, I will leave it at those three.

Let's take a brief look into modern media now. Specifically, the "autistic-coded robot" trope. A lot of times, when humans try to write robots, or AI or such, they think that they can just take all essential things that make humanity what it is, and take away a few things. Make them not express empathy, they don't get nonliteral phrases, they obviously speak in monotone. We could sprinkle in a little bit of feeling out of place with humanity for flavor aaaand it's autistic. Your robot is autistic. To name some examples of this trope, think Data from Star Trek, or Zane from Ninjago.

This trope is more or less echoed, beat for beat, with the autistic-coded alien trope. Examples of this flavor of the trope include Peridot from Steven Universe, Spock from Star Trek, or, and I'm sorry for anyone who I'm about to violently throw back into 2016 with this, Keith from Voltron.

Because nonhumanity is so often linked to autistic beings by the culture around us, desiring to be nonhuman or connecting with nonhumanity is now a recognized part of autistic culture. We often feel out of place in neurotypical society. Join autistic spaces, and you’ll see jokes like, “What kind of nonhuman did you think you were as a kid?” (In case you’re wondering, the answer is werewolf for me.) Growing up thinking that the reason behind your autistic traits is because you are secretly nonhuman is a common experience. Jokes about desiring a tail and to purr often go viral within autistic spaces, because they are forms of natural and nonverbal communication that shows those around us that we are happy. The topic of nonhumanity within autistic culture is also talked about within professional settings, such as in Kim Duff’s speech, “The Role of Changeling Lore in Autistic Culture”, at the 1999 Autreat conference of Autism Network International.

There is also discussion of how autistic beings oftentimes connect with animals better than with humans. For example, Temple Grandin is an autistic animal behavioralist who has written extensively on how her being autistic helps her understand how animals feel. For example, she speaks in 2004’s, “Animals in Translation: Using the Mysteries of Autism to Decode Animal Behavior”, and in 1997’s “Thinking the Way Animals Do: Unique Insights from a Person with a Singular Understanding”.

In more modern times, we have the 2022 article, “How Autism Connects Me With Animals”, in which Emily Moran Barwick, writes, quote, “I knew how profoundly frustrating, isolating and demoralizing it was to be unable to convey what I wanted to convey. I knew how it felt to never be truly understood. And it broke my heart thinking of what non-human animals were experiencing at the hands of humans; that no matter how desperately and clearly they communicated their terror and pain, they were ignored and discounted.” Endquote.

All of these connections have led to the creation of subcultures created in an attempt to reclaim the dehumanization put onto us. To name one example, voidpunk is a subculture created by tumblr user arotaro in the 2010s, and more or less hinges on this idea. Key points of this subculture include the rejection of the norm, embracing nonhumanity, and comfort in the unknown. In the words of it’s creator, quote, “It’s not the same as otherkin because it’s not really like, “Ah yes, I am a cat/dragon/wolf/that one guy from Homestuck/etc.”, it’s not necessarily something specific, and it’s not necessarily literally believing you’re something other than human. It’s, well, punk. Society puts out a lot of messages about What It Means To Be Human (trademark) that can make a lot of people who don’t completely fit the bill feel lost, broken, alone, or like they’re doing something wrong; Voidpunk is about taking that message of “you’re not human”, making it your own, and throwing it back in society’s face. You say I’m not human? Sure, ok. That’s chill. Why does being Human (trademark) have to be a goal to aspire to anyway? What’s so great about humanity?” Endquote. She then goes on to specifically namedrop neurodivergents as one of the target audiences for the subculture, as well. She also later answers an ask to clarify, quote, “Someone who doesn’t face dehumanization cannot be voidpunk.” Endquote.

So, where does all of this information intersect with the notable number of autistic alterhumans? Well, that’s just the question, isn’t it? Is it possible that alterhuman identity may correlate with those who have identities and neurotypes which are demonized by society? After all, queer beings are common within alterhuman spaces, too. And, if there is a correlation, is there causation there, as well? There are already some terms coined to describe when alterhuman identity is caused or influenced by autistic traits; such as ‘otherspin’, a term for when one’s alterhuman identity is caused / influenced by special interests. Furthermore, ‘altervexo’ attempts to describe identifying as alterhuman out of spite for the dehumanization one has faced. However, to my knowledge, no term has been made or extensive talks had about, voluntary or nonvoluntary, alterhuman identity, as possibly having origins within dehumanization.

So, I set out to have that conversation. As stated at the start of this panel, I ran a survey, mostly promoted on tumblr, from March 7th to July 1st, posing questions to the autistic alterhuman community about their personal experiences, which got over 500 responses! 537, to be exact. I’d like to share the results of this survey with you now. The raw data collected is available here. (Send link) I will also be posting both the raw data, and the script for this panel, to my tumblr, @azuremist, but that’s mostly for easy archival purposes. Now, it’s NUMBERS TIME, baby!

I asked everyone to indicate if they agreed or disagreed with the statements I made. For the statement, “I believe that my autism has influenced my alterhumanity in some way, shape, or form,” 92% of those who took my survey agreed, and 8% disagreed, which is a WILD split. Far beyond notable.

For the statement, “I feel like the way that autistic beings are seen by society has influenced my alterhumanity”, the split is a bit more even, with 72.4% agreeing, and 27.6% disagreeing.

This means that, of those who I polled who agreed that autism influenced their alterhumanity, 78.6% (rounding down) also agreed that the way autistic beings are viewed in society influenced their alterhumanity. This is a rate a bit over 3 in every 4.

This next question is one of the things that I asked more out of personal curiosity, which is, whether or not they feel more safe to be openly autistic in alterhuman spaces, when compared to other community spaces. Of those polled, 89.4% agreed, and 10.6% disagreed, which makes me quite happy! One anonymous being commented, quote, “I generally find that most alterhuman spaces are a lot more accepting of autistic beings than wider society if that makes sense? Going into an alterhuman space, I'm never concerned that it may not be safe or accessible for me.” Endquote. Someone else wrote in that they could testify to the opposite being true, as well; autistic spaces, in their experience, had a higher likelihood of being accepting of alterhuman identities. However, one being who answered ‘no’ to this question stated that they avoid alterhuman spaces for things related to this subject. They list as an example, quote, “Like the refusal of tone tags? I understand not wanting them to be used for you but banning them from the space all together? And also a lot of spaces, despite being accepting of autistic beings, still find a way to hate those beings for being autistic.” Making community spaces safe for autistic beings is an ongoing learning process for everyone involved. So please make sure to consult your local autistic advocate to make sure everything is accessible for those of all neurotypes.

For the next questions, I asked about everyone’s specific experience with alterhumanity. Another question that I asked, mostly out of curiosity, is, “Would you consider alterhumanity, as a subject, a special interest?” 64.8% of respondents answered ‘no’, and 35.2% answered ‘yes’.

The next question, though, is really quite interesting to me. It asks, “If you have any kintypes which originate from a piece of media: Would you consider that kintype's source material a special interest?” 69% of respondents (nice) answered ‘yes’, and 31% answered ‘no’. That’s a pretty close percentage to the question about alterhumanity as a special interest, but with the answers flipped. Indeed, many times in the section where I invite others to talk about their experience, there are respondents specifically namedropping that they believe their special interests contribute to their alterhumanity. Some, but not all, of these instances include a space conceptkin who has space as a special interest, two catkin, with one having Warrior Cats as a past special interest, and the other, cats in general as one, and someone who specifically wrote, quote, “I also feel as though my special interests in some medias have influenced the fact that I identify with both real and fictional species. For example, I have a large number of original characters who are demons and I feel like my special interest in them may have led me down the path of discovering myself as demonkin.” When discussing the subject of autism influencing alterhumanity, special interests were easily the thing that came up the most, other than how autistic beings are seen by neurotypical society.

The final multiple choice question I had asked, “If you have a nonhuman kintype of any kind: Do you experience species dysphoria and/or euphoria?” To this, 85.9% answered ‘yes’, and 14.1% answered ‘no’.

We can compare this to a survey not aimed at autistic alterhumans; specifically, the ‘Alterhumanity and Gender Survey’, as conducted by Eli, at pantomorph on tumblr. These results were posted on July 22nd of 2019, and reported that, in response to the question, “Do you experience species dysphoria?”, 4.9% answered ‘I used to,’ 8.9% answered ‘unsure’, 22.7% answered ‘no’, 36% answered ‘sometimes’ and 27.6% answered ‘yes’. Adding up the percentages of ‘I used to’, ‘sometimes’ and ‘yes’, we get 68.5% of respondents who are certain that they have, at some point, experienced species dysphoria.

This means that, according to these surveys, autistic alterhumans appear to have a higher chance of experiencing species dysphoria, with a 17.5% difference. Though, keep in mind, I included euphoria in my question, and Eli did not. This would certainly require more data to confirm, however, this at least would warrant further polling, in my opinion.

All of this talk about autistic beings and species dysphoria may have you thinking about the fact that autistic beings are statistically more likely to identify as transgender, with some estimates stating that transgender individuals are up to 6 times more likely to be autistic than cisgender individuals! This is because gender is stupid, and autistic folks are not. Multiple respondents to the survey brought this point up. One being specifically wrote in, quote, “Statistically, autistic folks are more likely to know they're trans than allistics, and I support the theory that that's got something to do with autistic beings seeing things without the lens of social cues and societal pressures, including more awareness of who we are and how we see ourselves. … Society is like, "You should be like this," and autistics are like, "But why? It doesn't really make sense, plus I don't fit in to those standards anyway, so why not choose my own path in life?"” Endquote. I definitely agree that the reason so many autistic folks identify as transgender may be similar to, or the same, reason that autistic folks seem to be more likely to be alterhuman.

Hello to all trans autistic alterhumans listening! Call that a triple threat.

Now, the final question that I asked. I listed multiple different alterhuman identities, and asked everyone to indicate which, if any, of the provided labels that they identify with. And, indeed, my hypothesis when going into this question was proven correct. Of the terms that I provided, it was “nonhuman” that most autistic alterhumans identified with specifically, with 74.9% of respondents identifying as nonhuman. Other popular answers to this question included ‘therian’, with 57.5%, and fictionkin with a nonhuman fictional character. Indeed, I did put two separate options for fictionkin, where they could indicate if their fictional kintype was human or not. 45.1% of respondents had a nonhuman fictotype, and 41.2% of respondents had a human fictotype. So, autistic fictionkin appear to have around a 9% (rounding down) higher likelihood to identify with nonhuman fictional characters. Unfortunately, I could not find another survey to compare this statistic against, but it is a statistic we have now, nonetheless.

Furthermore, I specifically listed 3 common kintypes that have been associated with autistic beings, as previously discussed: fairies, aliens, and robots / technology. Of these, techkin was easily the most popular, with 19.9% of respondents identifying as such. Alienkin and fairykin were close in numbers, with 11.2% identifying as alienkin, and 11.9% identifying as fairykin. On the subject of being robotkin, one being wrote, quote, “I do not on a literal, physical level believe I’m a robot, however, tropes related to robots and the way they behave and are treated feel analogous to my own lived experiences, so in some ways it feels as though I experience my life as a robot would.” Endquote.

Which segways nicely into the final question, which is the filled in responses. For this question, I prompted, “If you have anything you'd like to add, please tell me about your experiences involving your alterhumanity and autism.”

Many took the chance to speak on if they felt like their autism and alterhumanity were connected. As previously mentioned, lots of folks mentioned special interests as a factor. Lots of folks also said that they felt the two were connected, but couldn’t explain how, with a common sentiment being that it is a ‘chicken or the egg’ situation. Two different beings whose kintypes are their past lives wrote in, and both said that a hypothetical allistic version of them wouldn’t be able to get memories as easily. Multiple beings also wrote that they felt like the awakening process was made easier due to their autism. They were so used to seeing themselves as different from everybody else, and not understanding social cues, that they were more willing to take on, quote-unquote, “weird” solutions as the source of their feelings. Other commonly-mentioned points include dehumanization as a reason for alterhumanity, autistic traits being seen as similar to animalistic traits, and the possibly-related high rate of autistic pagans and witches.

Something that I didn’t expect going in, but perhaps should have, is the amount of autistic alterbeings who wrote about their struggle to find words to describe themselves. One ghostkin wrote they felt like their nonconformity to their kintype’s typical associated traits (like darkness, doom and gloom, et cetera) was due to their autism, but that they felt they didn’t belong with other ghostkin because of it. And a LOT of folks wrote in saying that they had a lot of trouble figuring out what terminology to use, especially regarding the ever-dreaded ‘identify with’ or ‘identify as’ question. One being wrote in that they see themself as psychological otherkin, but would be more accurately described as having a neurotype-based, or neurology-based, origin, due to their autism. However, this has caused some issues, as it is not seen as a, quote-unquote, ‘valid’ origin. Someone else describes having issues with this because the community does a lot of gatekeeping, and because it is easier to find beings complaining about words being misused than the actual use of words.

Now, there are some responses that I would like to read in full, or mostly in full, for your listening pleasure.

The first one is as follows. Quote. “When I was 6-ish, I started noticing that people treated me a bit like they treated our old Windows ‘98 Dell computer. The computer was inhuman when it worked (and praised for its distance from humanity! “Yes, it can play videos from the internet! Isn’t technology cool?”) and human when it broke down (“He’s getting overwhelmed, give us a sec.” “She’s blinking at me. I have no idea why this is such a difficult task.” “It ate my fucking CD. Stubborn POS.”). It’s a bit frustrating that my autistic traits are only praised when they make me convenient for others to use... I’m self-sufficient, I’m quiet, I’m a fast learner and a thorough researcher, so I rarely need to bother another person to complete the tasks I’m given. But because that’s all anyone ever seems to want me for... It’s a self-fulfilling cycle which is useful for the neurotypicals but exhausting for me, and when it ends in a burnout (inevitable) then I’m finally treated as human, but only because I’ve failed to be the computer they wanted. So I’m a computer when someone’s pleased with me, and I’m human when I’ve disappointed them. You can see why I might like the idea of being a PC more than a person. Also, when something’s wrong, computers’ error messages are both clearer and harder to ignore than a human’s requests for accommodation. This is a bit of a bummer, sorry. The upside is that I’m crazy good at data analysis now.” Endquote. This was excellently put, and I’m sure something that may resonate with autistic techkin.

Another write-in reads, quote, “One does not have to be autistic to be alterhuman or nonhuman, but one does have to be autistic to be my species. My species does not have human neurology, or allistic neurology. To be my species one must be autistic… though it’s more that my species has neurology which allistics will refer to as autism. I could not be my species if I wasn’t autistic.” Endquote. This is a very interesting response, and, to be honest, I sort of wish I knew what this being’s species was so that I could look more into it. It’s almost like a sort of alternate view of autistic nonhumans or autistic aliens, which is just lovely.

Then, there is this submission. Quote, “Diagnosed with autism at 15, explained a lot, I can't help but wonder - if I'd known, would I still dehumanize myself in the way I do? Other kids called me "cat boy" because when they would pick on me, I'd hiss at them. I don't know why. I think I just saw my cats do it and it was the only way I knew how to retaliate. But it just made them laugh. ... I stopped seeing myself as human a long time ago, more of an animal for people's amusement. ... But when I found out about otherkin, it was like suddenly this experience of mine I was certain I was alone in was shared. For some people it's spiritual, but even in our differences, our feelings were the same. The community  taught me to love this nonhuman side of me, and they were understanding of my diagnosis. I didn't feel like an outcast there, they made me feel like it was something to cherish, and I do.” Endquote. Again, absolutely very well-said. Reclaiming and celebrating nonhumanity is, from what I’ve gathered, a large part of the autistic alterhuman experience, and this response phrased it just wonderfully.

Lastly, in regards to responses: shoutout to the one guy who said, “I just finished making my first ever tail, isn’t that sick?”, because yes, yes it is.

Thank you so much again to all the respondents to my survey!

And so, we have now reached the discussion section, which will last until my time runs out. This is where I will cease looking at a script, so please send anything you’d particularly like me to see now! Also, feel free to ask me questions, and I will answer to the best of my ability. Alternatively, tell me about your experiences, or just give general comments!

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

Hey everyone, look what I made. It took me a completely normal amount of time and I definitely did not spent all weekend on it. All weekend just transcribing and collating. Not counting the time across the last couple of years I spent finding all this stuff. I wouldn't do that.

But if I had done that, it would have started as an Excel file, but some of the transcripts were too long to fit into even the maximum sizes of a cell. Exporting it as a PDF has page breaks and won't let it take up the whole screen, and turning it into an image destroyed the links.

So I ended up going back to the HTML that I learned at computer camp when I was 13 and then used to make Harry Potter websites when I was 14 and have hardly ever used since. Had to Google a bunch of stuff to remember how to do it, but I managed to rewrite the entire table in HTML code in Notepad, and then I found a website that let me upload it in exchange for that annoying little purple thing at the bottom. I would not like to admit how long I spent trying to work out how to just upload one HTML page without having to sign up for building an entire website. Because it was too long. There had to be an easier way to do this. But I don't know what it is.

Anyway, I made this:

So... does anyone want that? It's a spreadsheet where I've collected everything I've found that seems like it could be a direct reference to the Chocolate Milk Gang. It's got transcriptions of the relevant bits of video and audio, and links to PDFs of the text or mp3s or mp4s of the video and audio files, and overall, I spent way too much time on it.

I may have gone slightly Beautiful Mind about it this weekend, pinning links up to my metaphorical cork board, connecting them with bits of red string, and frantically declaring, "It doesn't add up! What, exactly, did Andrew Maxwell call them in 2002? Because I'm getting conflicting stories here!"

At least I now have an easy thing to link to when I want to tell people what the Chocolate Milk Gang is. I realize I throw that term around a lot on this blog, and I stop to explain it every few months or, but I'm also aware that sometimes people come across these posts without all that context and it's confusing. So there you go, if anyone's ever confused by what I mean when I say "Chocolate Milk Gang". It's that, the stuff at that link. It's all those things. It's an international crime syndicate that sometimes organizes soccer matches.

I realize there are a bunch of different sources at that link, making it look like information is easy to find about it. So for some further context, those 16 spreadsheet entries are the only references to it that I've been able to find, across many many hours of searching, across the last couple of years. If you're confused about what the Chocolate Milk Gang is and you want to know the real answer, it's that a few years ago I happened to hear one particular Daniel Kitson show too soon after I'd resigned as board president of my wrestling team, and I got a bit overly attached to the idea of simpler times when people were still building their dream, before it all got out of hand. So I decided to obsessively research this term that appeared on John Oliver's Wikipedia page. It made sense at the time.

Having one link I can point to and say "the stuff we know about the what the Chocolate Milk Gang was - it's all in there" is a nice bonus for that spreadsheet, but it wasn't the original point of it. I mainly wanted to make that spreadsheet so I could get some clear data on 1) its membership list, and 2) its actual name. Hence the spreadsheet columns for both those things.

I’d consider most name that appear in my column for the membership list to be a significant Chocolate Milk Gang member. Though one membership list included Jimmy Carr, as part of the “gang” of comedians who hung out with Demetri Martin in Edinburgh. I’ve already addressed that in another post, but the upshot is that obviously Jimmy Carr’s not in the Chocolate Milk Gang. He's just a guy Demetri Martin probably hung out with in Edinburgh once, so that article grouped him in with the others.

Oh, and there’s the Russell Howard documentary that describes his "golden generation" of comedians, which included some key CMG people, but then moved on to his other comedy friends, like his roommates from the famous Bristol house, and Wil Hodgson. I don’t think the other Bristol guys (Richardson, Robins, Olver) count as CMG, since they were younger and weren't doing comedy during those earlier days when the CMG was formed. But Wil Hodgson performed in Edinburgh in 2004.

This of course gets complicated, because if we’re being very literal about defining the CMG as “people who got milkshakes at the restaurant called Favorit after late-night shows at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival in 2002” – which was the original meaning of the name – then we’re leaving out some important people who turn up on most CMG membership lists, like Josie Long and Alun Cochrane. So I tend to use the term more broadly than that, to mean “people who were making a certain type of comedy in the 00s, a type that at the time was considered alternative because it was more gentle and indie-like than their more glamorous showbiz predecessors, and they crossed over with each other a lot, personally and professionally.” But that definition can make it difficult to get a clear list, as it basically boils down to: anyone who, while performing comedy from about 2002 to 2007, ever wore a t-shirt on stage, made a vaguely nerdy joke, and hung out with Daniel Kitson. And that can include quite a lot of people. It may well include Wil Hodgson. It could arguably include some of those Bristol guys (although I think “not being an alcoholic” was a fairly big part of the CMG ethos, which rules out Richardson and Robins). Pappy's Fun Club? Lots of people were around at the time.

I think of a few people as being CMG even if they’re mentioned in that spreadsheet list at all. I count Gavin Osborn as a bona fide central CMG member, even though he sure didn't perform in Edinburgh in 2002. He’s been involved in so many collaborations with other central CMG figures, and his work so embodies their ethos, that it doesn’t matter that he didn’t do all that stuff in Edinburgh. He was in the National Youth Theatre with John Oliver; his CMG connections pre-date Edinburgh 2002.

I think I’d count Isy Suttie as CMG, too. She was performing during prime CMG years, and doing that type of comedy that characterized the CMG (gentle, indie-like). She’s also collaborated with CMG people quite a bit. So she didn’t have to be literally drinking milkshakes with them in Edinburgh 2002 to count on their membership list (though it’s possible that she could have been drinking milkshakes with them in 2002, as she was definitely spending lots of time with at least one CMG member at the time, but I’m pretty sure she wasn’t in Edinburgh that year).

So I would say, probably, the main list of Chocolate Milk Gang members is: Daniel Kitson, David O'Doherty, John Oliver, Andy Zaltzman, Russell Howard, Josie Long, Gavin Osborn, Isy Suttie, Alun Cochrane, Bret McKenzie, Jermaine Clement, Demetri Martin. Maybe Taika Waititi? He got mentioned a couple of times but I'm not sure he did any actual CMG stuff, I think he was just a guy David O'Doherty liked.

So that's the membership list. Now I'd like to address the title, and issue with which is what prompted me to start on this spreadsheet in the first place. That issue being: Why has everyone let me spend nearly 2.5 years posting constantly about a British group called the Chocolate Milk Gang, without informing me that the term "chocolate milk" isn't used in Britain like it is in North America? That is an important piece of information for my research, which someone gave me for the first time last week, and it made me decide I should probably do a full-scale study into what this means.

I had wondered, before, why they got named after chocolate milk, when they were apparently drinking milkshakes. I assumed it was just other comedians making fun of them for immaturely not drinking alcohol, implying that they weren't just drinking milkshakes, they were drinking chocolate milk, the way children do.

Nope. It turns out that in Britain, when they say "chocolate milk", they're referring to a chocolate milkshake. When they say "chocolate milkshake", they are also referring to a chocolate milkshake. How do they refer to chocolate milk? Most of the time they don't, apparently it's not as common there. I think. Someone in England told me this, and I've tried looking it up further, but it's confusing. Chocolate milk definitely does exist over there, it just apparently isn't served in nearly every restaurant, the way I'm used to in Canada. So I guess they weren't using that term for the milk and started just using it to mean milkshakes? I don't know, Britain is a confusing place. They also refer to juices as smoothies.

That certainly explains why some comedians got named after chocolate milk, when they were drinking milkshakes. It also explains a bit of the occasional variation in the group's name - Russell Howard recently called them "The Milkshake Brigade", and in an interview in 2006, David O'Doherty said they were "The Milkshake Kids". If "chocolate milk" and "chocolate milkshakes" are interchangeable terms over there, then I guess they can be interchangeable in the gang's name, too.

But it's definitely supposed to be a gang. I don't know where this "brigade" stuff is coming from. David McSavage called them the "Chocolate Milk Brigade", as well. And, again, David O'Doherty once called them kids. What is that? I am not going to change my blog's tagline to saying I am preserving the legacy of the "Chocolate Milk Kids".

And then we have the differing stories about the name's origins. David O'Doherty claims that Glenn Wool coined the term "Chocolate Milk Gang". David McSavage claims that Andrew Maxwell coined it (though he also claims that the coined term is "Chocolate Milk Brigade). David O'Doherty does tell stories of Andrew Maxwell being one of those people who made fun of them for the general nerdiness that got them the CMG nickname, but in his story, Andrew Maxwell was mainly making fun of their bags, rather than their drinking habits.

The interesting thing about the above paragraph is that no one in it is British. I've tried to look up whether chocolate milk was a thing in Ireland in 2002, and whether Irish people said "chocolate milk" to mean "chocolate milkshake" like British people did. I can barely find information about British people doing it, so of course there wasn't anything on Irish differences. But they share a whole lot of cultural colloquialisms, so I'm going to assume it was probably similar.

Glenn Wool, however, is Canadian. And Canadians definitely do not conflate chocolate milk with chocolate milkshakes, even in 2002. So it's odd if he coined that term, calling them the Chocolate Milk Gang because they drank milkshakes. So maybe it did, in fact, originally come from Andrew Maxwell. I assume they both used that term, making it not too difficult to reconcile O'Doherty and McSavage's differing claims about whose term it was.

...I am tired. I think I probably have more to say about that spreadsheet, but I need to go to bed. I could save this as a draft and add more to it tomorrow, but I genuinely think I'll sleep better if I hit "post" on this now and feel like I've got something to share from an entire weekend spent on such a pointless project. I'll just make a new post later if I have more to say. It's all right. So that's what I've been up to. How's everyone else doing?

[rjalker]

idk if anybody has said this to u yet but thank u for spreading awareness about how the public domain actually works, if i saw one more "you Have to call him willie and he HAS to be black and white" post i think id have a conniption fit

Thank you! It's very frustrating seeing all the fearmongering misinformation. I've been looking forward to this for the last year, but somehow I didn't realize that so many people had no idea what the Public Domain was at all...

I'm hoping people will actually put in the effort to do research and learn about these things so we don't have this problem every year, rather than everyone jumping on the "lets play attack dog for Disney's lawyers for free by screaming copyright infringement at every drawing of Mickey Mouse" bandwagon.

Like. It is baffling in the extreme how many people have instantly turned into corporate attack dogs over things that they do not in any way understand, but somehow they think they're being anticapitalist by doing so? They think they're being progressive by leaping to fearmonger and uphold Disney's stranglehold over the Public Domain by spreading fearmongering and misinformation that...literally didn't even exist before five days ago.

People now think that because Mickey Mouse is Public Domain, this somehow magically means it's literally illegal to draw Mickey Mouse in any way. It's confounding. And its just showing how deep the corporate propaganda runs. And I'm really really hoping people will start waking up and realizing how fucked up their reactions to this is and start actually learning about the Public Domain instead of immediately just spreading blatant misinformation about it that a five second google search will dispel.

I've now had to see four people proclaiming, with utmost self-righteous confidance, that celebrating the Public Domain, and celebrating that Mickey Mouse is Public Domain, is "corporate bootlicking for Disney" and "free advertising for Disney".

Because these people saw everyone saying not to give JK Rowling free advertising by continuing to celebrate her characters when the books have bigotry baked into them, and now think that they can just say the same thing about anything no matter what the context, even when they have absolutely no idea what they're talking about.

Disney has done so much to destroy awareness of the Public Domain that people are now convinced that celebrating the Public Domain...is capitalistic greed. Really makes you wish werewolf transformations were in real life because god fucking damn do I want to maul some billionaires.

I am once again begging everyone, as a bare bones beginning, to their understanding of the Public Domain, to go watch this presentation by the Internet Archive from 2019 if you're able to. (Some of them have subtitles, some of them don't, I'm going to ask if they have a transcript)

Here's a relevant clip from video 14.

[ID: A short video clip of Joseph Gratz at the 2019 Internet Archive conference about the Public Domain, sitting in a yellow chair as he speaks, saying and gesturing along with his words: "That's the, uh, official, maybe impractical strategy. The unofficial, um, more practical strategy is...be bold! Right?" [applause] "If you're acting in good faith, people are not going, ah, most copyright holders are people of good faith, who do not want to go after people who are acting in good faith, who are not harming their legitimate economic interests. And so if you're doing something, even pretty boldly, that is, that you believe and have a basis to believe, uh, and a reasonable basis to believe is in the Public Domain, or is fair use -- going out and doing it is the way, um, is the way forward, rather than being endlessly afraid." His speech ends, there's a short pause, then more applause. End ID.]

[choosejoyangel]

Not Another Macallan

With love, Vanessa @choosejoyangel. :) Thank you to @whoevrwhatevr for encouraging me to write. I am grateful.

Author's note: Anything SVU-related belongs to their respective owners. The original character, Christmas Grace Lennox, and everything else belong to me. I am on no other platform besides Tumblr, Vimeo, and Google/YouTube at my handle, @choosejoyangel. Enjoy, angels! :)

Just some positive goodness to brighten your day!

Soundtrack: Queen-You're My Best Friend and Dave Matthews Band-Crush <3 :)

I thought it would be more engaging for the reader to follow Rafael and Rita’s banter if it were written as a transcription. Get cozy as you imagine being in the same room as besties for life, Rafael Barba and Rita Calhoun, reflecting on an evening most likely spent alone, just the two of them starting the night at their favorite ice cream parlor over a banana split debating a case and ending the night keeping each other warm like they have always done since their Harvard Law days. Rita realizes it is time to let Rafael know how much he truly means to her, and that includes showing him he deserves to be happy with the woman he does not want to imagine his life without. Who is this woman? Is it her? Or, is Rita helping her best friend allow himself the chance at true love with someone else? 

Rita: Why are you in my kitchen, Rafi? It is your birthday, not mine.

Rafael: You know I hate surprises.

Rita: Then why are you trying to hide your smile?

Rafael: I am not smiling.

Rita: And I am 39.

Rafael: For the sixth year in a row.

Rita: I should have bought you another bottle of Macallan.

Rafael: I liked this gift better, Rita.

Rita: Speak up, babe. Did you lose your speaking voice all of a sudden?

Rafael: I liked this gift better, Rita!

Rita: I heard you the first time, but I wanted everyone still here to know how cuddly you are.

Rafael: You can take the man out of the Bronx.

Rita: But you can’t take the Bronx out of the man. I get it, Rafael. We don’t like letting our guard down. It may work in the courtroom but not in the bedroom. 

Rafael: You never had complaints about either of our bedrooms, sweetheart.

Rita: Never! 

Rafael: I trust you.

Rita: I trust you too, Rafi.

Rafael: Um, are you up to finish tonight with a bang?

Rita: I don’t think that is a good idea.

Rafael: What is wrong? I’m so sorry. I loved my party. Seeing everyone from work…um.

Rita: And home?

Rafael: Yes.

Rita: If not for her, you and I would celebrate your birthday over a banana split.

Rafael: Her?

Rita: Yes, Mistletoe.

Rafael: You mean Christmas?

Rita: Mistletoe, Christmas, who cares?

Rafael: Her name is Christmas, and yes, you do care.

Rita: Who in their right mind names their kid after a holiday? 

Rafael: It’s not important. Leave her alone. She is my friend, Rita.

Rita: Friend, eh?

Rafael: Yes, my friend.

Rita: I have known you for over twenty years, Rafael Barba. 

Rafael: And?

Rita: I have not seen that look on your face since, um, well, you know who I am talking about.

Rafael: Yelina?

Rita: Ugh! I thought I told you never to repeat her name in my presence.

Rafael: Come on! Yelina broke my heart, not yours.

Rita: Don’t say her name!

Rafael: Okay!

Rita: Christmas helped me plan your surprise birthday party. She was a big help, considering my caseload. It’s not like she has much to do besides play in her art studio.

Rafael: She works in her art studio, Rita. That is her job, and she is busy, too.

Rita: I know, Rafael. I love it when you defend her. You start blushing, and your green eyes get brighter in defense of what you call her “your friend”?

Rafael: I hate you.

Rita: I hate you too.

Rafael: She helped you?

Rita: Yes, she did. And the feeling is mutual between you and her. 

Rafael: Are you psychic now?

Rita: No, I am a woman. 

Rafael: Oh, I didn’t know.

Rita: I am trying to tell you that I don’t think it is a good idea for us to have sex anymore, Rafael.

Rafael: You and I can still be friends.

Rita: You will always be my best friend, Rafi.

Rafael: You will always be my best friend, too, Rita.

Rita: Christmas is your best friend now.

Rafael: I am allowed to have two best friends.

Rita: I know. She wants you to be happy, even if it may be you and me. I assured her that you and I are or were what young people like her call “friends with benefits.”

Rafael: She is not that young, Rita. 

Rita: You were in high school when she was born, Rafael.

Rafael: It does not bother us; does it bother you?

Rita: No!

Rafael: Will you be happy?

Rita: I am happy, and I am happy for you too. Besides, I am seeing someone.

Rafael: Really? What’s his name?

Rita: She.

Rafael: Well, okay then. What is her name? 

Rita: She is a lawyer; that is all I will tell you for now.

Rafael: Please tell me her name before you put a ring on her finger. 

Rita: Changing subjects.

Rafael: I was kidding. I do hope to meet her if that is what you want. 

Rita: You will be the first to know. 

Rafael: I think Christmas is still here. 

Rita: Of course she is. I can smell the holly from here.

Rafael: Rita! 

Rita: If you want to help in my kitchen, make some coffee for us, Rafael. 

Rafael: I don’t want to ask her to leave yet.

Rita: The coffee is for her, too, silly. If she leaves, you leave with her. You two live near each other. Oh, you have protection?

Rafael: Rita, I am not discussing my sex life with you.

Rita: She is cute. Ask her to spend the night with you.

Rafael: Rita.

Rita: I don’t want to find out you didn’t at least give her a kiss goodnight. And you know I am not talking about a chaste kiss between friends, Rafael Barba!

Rafael: You won’t, Rita Calhoun.

Rita: She and I are friends now.

Rafael: Hmm.

Rita: Rafael and Christmas sitting in a tree…

Rafael: I will meet you in the sitting room.

Rita: You better hide that blush of yours.

Rafael: Rita.

Rita: What?

Rafael: Thank you.

Rita: You’re welcome. 

Rafael: I love you, Rita.

Rita: I love you too, Rafael.

Rafael: My wish came true.

Rita: Yes, it did. Happy Birthday, Rafael. Now, get out of my kitchen.

⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°⋆˚✿˖°

[paramorearchived]

June 17, 2010

Transcript:

strange youth

long time coming, this post is....... was.... why am i talking like yoda now?

so, i'm really excited to be writing here. not really sure what i'm going to write about yet but that's what makes it exciting. i guess i can start with, it's been a wild month, to say the least. "life is a daring adventure or nothing at all". is there really more to say about that than that? ok, well one more thing... human beings are no less respectable when they are at their most vulnerable. and that's why i try to have faith in people. 

right now, it's about 12:30am - we landed here in Hamburg, Germany about 10 hours ago. all i've done is sleep, watch movies and "glaze" my hair. i'm trying not to dye it at all this summer besides right before the honda civic tour. i like the way the colors fade and how strung out i start to look with my hair turning all sorts of greenish yellow. it's even better when i don't wear any make-up out. what a sight. anyways, i'm tired and at the same time completely restless. and in, what some people would call, a "desperate need" for a shower. and what's most exciting is that my face wash spilled out into the rest of my toiletry bag. there's still a little left though.  on the flight over, i read half of a new book i've started called Wonderland Avenue. it's by Danny Sugerman, in case you're interested, who happens to be my voice doctors' brother. NEATO! the author of this book not only met and hung around The Doors as a young kid around the age of 13 ... but by the time he was out of his teens he was already managing them AND Iggy Pop. (if you aren't aware of these artists, get to googling). so yeah, couldn't put that book down until finally i had to... cause me and jeremy wanted to watch Shutter Island on the plane tv's. that's right, folks, business class seats have an assortment of movies available to you on little personal tv's. what a bunch of snobs we must be! by the time we were done with that movie we realized we still weren't tired so we watched Fantastic Mr. Fox (directed by Wes Anderson, an absolute genius)... and then as jeremy fell asleep i proceeded to doodle in my journal and listen to Nirvana's 'Incesticide', then Mumford and Sons' 'Sigh No More'. it was a good flight. clearly, i got a lot of things accomplished.

again, i'm still just sitting here in my hotel room letting the orange glaze sit in my hair until i finally give in to a shower. i didn't even have enough orange left to cover my full head, so just get over it when you see me and i look like a hot mess. 

maybe now is a good place and time to state my opinion on our being everywhere at the same time. seems like we've got just about every magazine covered this month, people are playing our songs and i'm singing on B.o.B's song and it's just crazy all the time. i do love it... it's a lot of fun to work hard and see your work all around you. yet at the same time, there are still large number of people that i don't think will ever get it. the SPIN article (you know, the cover one) that was just printed about us doesn't really seem to say anything ABOUT us as a band. and it seems that in most cases writers simply enjoy looking at us and exclaiming - like they've discovered something huge - "THEY'RE YOUNG!" or of course there's always, "THEY'RE CHRISTIANS"... or "THEY DON'T SHOOT UP IN THE BACK OF THE BUS!" what is this the 80's? is it really that sensational that we aren't the second coming of Motley Crue? does our music suggest that we should be acting otherwise? listen, i'm not trying to sit here and wreck the writer from SPIN. i'm sure it's hard to get a handle on any band within the amount of time given to capture "our story". maybe reading articles about us just gets a little monotonous, that's all. oh and i'm not actually friends with McLovin or Miley. awkward turtle.

and on a slightly different tip, it's my opinion that anyone who is coming onto our band looking for controversy is completely missing the point. the point isn't in the intent of controversy, the point is that there is no way around it. as people, aren't we all bursting at the seams with conflict and controversy? the point of our music is that there are human hearts in it. because anyone knows that eventually, someone will find something on you. if you don't do drugs, you probably have another addiction. even innocent. we could stop looking for the wrongs and realize that they're inevitable on the way to something more meaningful. i'm not totally preaching here. talking to myself as well, in case you wondered. who knows? maybe i really am just bored with giving music journalists the benefit of the doubt. like they're really gonna let people know what we would want to tell them. yet still, i want to have faith in people. and anyways, what WOULD we want to tell people if we had that much space to write about ourselves? it would probably end up just the same. does it ever bug you guys? do you ever feel like some people are just missing it? 

when you come to a show do you feel the same thing that i feel when i'm on that stage? i mean, i know you're not standing on the stage... but surely you can feel the same energy that i'm feeling, to some degree. it's so much more powerful than all the trivial nonsense that people chalk our band up to be. it means something great and it feels empowering. it's the grace of knowing that we can all totally suck and be a little messed up and then stand in a room with thousands of other people who are exactly the same way, no matter how dressed up they look on the outside, and we can be broken all the same. 

man, what have i gone and spouted off about now? sorry for such a long winded, self-serving type of post.  i'm ready to wash this crap out of my hair and try to sleep til the show tomorrow.  we are actually sharing the stage with The Get Up Kids, Hot Water Music and Dropkick Murphy's tomorrow. should be a good one!

<3 hayley

[fierceawakening]

Hi. You've been posting about learning Phyrexian for a bit and I'm interested in learning but don't know where to start. Do you have any resources or advice that you could share? Thank you.

Yes!

The best general resource for "oof how do I, an English speaker, figure out what the heck is going on with these pretty lines of weird text? aaa help!" would be GuruJ's Phyrexian Language Field Guide. The latest version is posted in a Google Drive and shared with the community here:

The recent reveal of the alphabet from WOTC renders it a little obsolete (GuruJ has Q and K switched around, for example) so it's not 100% accurate, but he's done an absolutely fantastic job of dissecting the grammar so you can start to see patterns.

The official alphabet, posted by WOTC, is here:

Although this has just recently been posted, most of us studying the language immediately switched to this version of transcription, as it's much easier than trying to map things the way we were doing before (using the International Phonetic Alphabet or IPA--this uses some of that, but marks the "metallic" letters clearly and more systematically.)

This is the official font WOTC uses, found by downloading it from their site. Their version makes it hard to type the word separator character, so look for GuruJ's version (I swear this guy is Norn's gift to Phyrexia) in the comment thread there.

And here's some basic grammar tips from me (which are all in the Field Guide but this is the order I'd personally put them in):

Sentences in English go like Subject Verb Object: I go to the store. Subject is me, verb is go, store is where I go.

Sentences in Phyrexian are in a very different order.

They begin with a marker of "mood," which is usually tense but can be other things too. So if I'm saying I go, rather than that I did go or I will go, I start with a marker that shows what I'm saying is current and factual:

(It is) + rest of sentence.

Phyrexian orders things as subject object verb. The last word in a Phyrexian sentence is almost always the verb (with a couple weird exceptions)

Verbs are conjugated for who's doing the action (I/we, you, he/she/them) but not for tense, as that's usually already given by the mood marker.

So, very roughly:

(It is) + (to-store) + (go-I/we).

(Phyrexian makes no distinction between I and we, perhaps understandably as they're essentially Borg. From what we can tell, if you want to make sure it's clear you mean yourself the individual, you have to use your name. (It is) + (to-store) + (Fierceawakening) + (go-i/we.)

Versus, if I'm saying I will go:

(Will) + (to-store) + (go-I/we).

Or that he went:

(Has happened) + (to-store) + (go-he/she/they).

Or demanding you go:

(Imperative) + (to-store) + (go-you).

Aaaaand I need to head out now, but... there's the basics of how to look at a sentence. I hope it's not too horribly confusing.

[sortofanobsession]

so excited that you’re back! hopefully everything is going well for you and excited to read more of your work :D

Thanks.

I'm trying to get back in the swing of things.

I've just had a ton of doctors appointments, weekly pt, working 2 jobs, and dealing with some family stuff.

So it has been so busy I've barely had time to open Google docs let alone so the lengthy plot research a lot of my fics take. Any fic that even plays the tiniest bit in canon I am using 3 websites at least, transcripts and clips to make sure I have dialogue and plot points that are or mirror canon.

I don't know if I've ever actually revealed how much time I put into my fics, I have on my personal Tumblr, but not here.

Like the hours I have spent on military research alone just for rank and Eddie's character (most was just reviewing research done long a go for an rp oc) but I put in a lot of effort (also helps my dad was 3rd gen Army). I'm only just starting to have the time again now that my orthopedic specialist says I shouldn't need to see him anymore. So yay on that, means no more x rays every few weeks, just pt.

But thanks for sticking with me.

I haven't given up.

[lonita]

B roll - 2020 08 31

30 - If you are recording something for later transcription please do not type near the recording device. That is incredibly disturbing for someone trying to suss out what the speakers are saying. Humans have selective hearing, devices don't.

30 - One of my friends really loathes the current proliferation of the phrase "the new normal". For myself it's "I've done my research" - which usually comes out of the mouths of someone who spent two hours on Google and sounds like they're stamping their feet like a five-year-old.

30 - Any thoughts on which brand of ginger ale exists that actually tastes like it has ginger in it?

30 - I think I'm experiencing the only aspect of Ludditeism I'll ever feel, which is companies who want to force you to use an app when you'd rather use a website. Phone are delightful, I'm sure, when you're not a visually impaired person who'd rather use a big screen.

30 - There appears to be some kind of heritage walk going on over the road at Sandyford Place.

30 - I think the two most gross things I used to eat as a child were ketchup sandwiches and toast with mayo. I was not particularly imaginative when it came to food as a child.

30 - I have this feeling that I have another uteran fibroid. I do not enjoy the prospect of living with that until it bursts. Hope it's just food poisoning.

30 - I'm now working on my … fifth? basket of peaches. I am not ashamed.

30 - I'm binging True Blood again - but the site I'm streaming it off of seems to have got themselves a set with subtitles from, of all things, Grease.

30 - It's very hard to explain to people why 'balancing budgets' is for corporations, households, and accounting class, not governments.

30 - The statue of John A MacDonald was not torn down. It was drunk and fell over on its own. It was a pre-existing condition.

30 - I don't know what it says that I misread "architect" as "antichrist". I mean, I'm legally blind and all, but still. I don't think it's that.

31 - Working at home isn't a privilege bubble. Minimum wage customer service workers do it too.

31 - Sometimes I deeply crave a Little Oly’s chocolate malt.

[speed-seo]

Uncover the Underused B2B SEO Strategies Your Competitors Use to Crush Your Lead Gen

Search engine optimization (SEO) is often treated as an afterthought in B2B marketing. But what if I told you that a strategic SEO approach could help you generate, on average, 3X more leads than your top competitor in just 6-12 months? It's true - but you need to move beyond the SEO basics and get strategic with underutilized tactics tailored specifically to B2B buying cycles. In this comprehensive guide, you'll discover insider strategies on intent-based keywords, pillar content, backlink building, technical SEO, and busting myths holding your SEO back. With over 1,000 words of tactical advice, this is the guide your competitors don't want you to read! Laser-Focused Keywords Deliver 3X More B2B Leads Optimizing for informational, intent-driven keywords is a proven way to generate more leads, yet most B2B brands only target product and service terms. Here's how to uncover the questions and pain points your customers have at every stage of their journey. Move Beyond Keyword Checklists with This Research Rather than rely on generic keyword tools, take the time to dig into the search questions your ideal buyers have as they move through the funnel. Tools like Google's Keyword Planner certainly have a place, but also analyze chat logs, voice of customer data, and sales call transcripts to reveal actual language used. Surveys and support tickets are a goldmine for uncovering informational search terms. Align SEO to Each Buyer's Journey Stage With this expanded keyword research, you can now optimize pages and content to target each stage of the B2B buying journey. For example, attorneys in the awareness phase may search for "how to reduce legal discovery costs" while those evaluating solutions look for comparisons like "ediscovery software features". The Results: 3X More Leads in 6 Months One B2B client using this intent-driven approach saw a 206% increase in organic leads in just 6 months. Their competitor targeting the same persona saw only a 68% bump. By aligning SEO tightly to informational search queries, they tripled their competitor's leads. Pillar Content Sets You Apart as an Authority Forget thin blog posts that barely scratch the surface. To really demonstrate expertise around topics your prospects care about, you need pillar content. I'm talking epic guides, comprehensive ebooks and toolkits - the type of resources people happily hand over their email address to get their hands on. In my decade of doing B2B SEO, I've seen first-hand how pillar content can transform a company's lead gen strategy. Become a Trusted Resource Here's the truth - people want to learn from brands they trust. In competitive spaces like legal, finance and healthcare, establishing trust is everything. Pillar content is your secret weapon to position your brand as an authority buyers can rely on. Unlike short blog posts, pillars show you've done the work to create something truly valuable. We're talking Ultimate Guides with stats, actionable takeaways, and everything an ideal prospect needs to know on a topic. Don't hold back! Make it a beast of a download. Turn Pillars into Lead Magnets Now comes the fun part - turning that pillar into a lead generation workhorse. Gate access to the download with a simple contact form. Promote it heavily across channels for months. One client did this with a comprehensive SEO guide for attorneys and got 521 new leads in just 90 days. Invest Time for Maximum Impact I won't lie to you - creating awesome pillar content takes time and effort. But it's one of the highest ROI activities for long term lead gen. For a big impact across multiple personas, aim for 2-3 new pillars per quarter. Repurpose and promote them for months (even years) to maximize conversions. "Non-Traditional" Backlinks - It's All About Relationships Guest posting on other blogs is just one backlink tactic - and not always the best for B2B. The most valuable links come from active participation in your industry's communities. Become a Genuinely Helpful Expert Seriously - stop spamming forums and groups trying to sneak in backlinks. Instead, focus on building relationships by consistently providing value. Share insights, offer advice, be helpful. Organically weave in mentions of your relevant content if it benefits the community. HARO - A Goldmine for Quality Backlinks I can't stress enough how valuable HARO has been for one of my clients. It's a platform where journalists request expert sources for articles. In 6 months, they've been featured in mainstream publications like Forbes, Inc, and Entrepreneur - earning quality backlinks, branding wins, and new traffic. Measure Relationship-Building, Not Just Links Sure, track backlink growth from these sources. But also measure the relationships you're building in communities and with journalists. This compounds over time into insane authority-boosting wins. Technical SEO - The Competitive Edge With how much B2B buyers rely on search, technical SEO can make or break your marketing. How does your site stack up on crucial factors like speed, mobile optimization and indexation? Site Speed - Optimize for the Impatient Here's a scary stat: 53% of mobile site visitors will leave a page that takes over 3 seconds to load. B2B buyers are even more impatient - don't make them wait! Use tools like Google PageSpeed Insights and Pingdom to catch speed issues. Mobile Responsiveness - No More Pinched Fingers Trying to read content on a non-mobile friendly site makes me want to chuck my phone across the room. Seriously, we're past the point where mobile optimization is optional - make it happen. Test your site on multiple devices and fix pesky issues like tiny text or wonky navigation. Indexation - Get Your Pages Found It means nothing to optimize content if Google can't index and surface your pages in results! Sneaky technical problems like crawling errors can completely hide your content from search. Stay on top of indexation with tools like Google Search Console. The key is constantly monitoring and improving technical SEO issues that impact user experience. It pays off big time. Conclusion and Next Steps Throughout this guide, we've explored proven yet underutilized SEO strategies tailored specifically to B2B buying cycles: - Intent-based keywords help you uncover the informational questions your prospects have at each stage, leading to 3X more leads. - Pillar content sets you apart as an authority, turning epic guides into lead generation workhorses that bring in 500+ new contacts. - Relationship-focused link building in communities and via HARO outreach leads to high-quality backlinks from trusted industry sources. - Fixing technical SEO issues like site speed and indexation creates a foundation for SEO success. These are strategic plays your competitors likely haven't tapped into yet. Adopting them now before the masses catch on provides a unique competitive advantage for your B2B organization. Imagine having a steady flow of qualified leads from across the buyer's journey - not just when they're ready to purchase. Envision closing deals faster because prospects already know and trust you. This future is possible when you align your SEO approach tightly to how B2B buyers research solutions. The time is now to transform your SEO. Click here to schedule a custom audit and roadmap to kickstart implementing these strategies. Our team is ready to uncover gaps in your current SEO approach and build a high-impact plan tailored to your business goals. Congratulations on committing to SEO success - let's talk soon! Read the full article

[maniculum]

I say this as an enjoyer of video essays: there is an important distinction between them and traditional essays that has nothing to do with video essays being a less prestigious format or academic papers being better written. It’s this:

Video content is harder to fact-check than text content.

First, in text essays, there already exists a system by which you are expected to cite your sources. Pick a citation format, put in your footnotes or parentheticals where necessary, boom. Done. And people will notice if they’re not there because it’s an expected part of the essay.

You can do that in a video essay, and many creators do. (Last Week Tonight basically has its own visual citation format, for instance — I know that’s a TV show and not a Youtube channel, but their “main segment” each week is functionally a short video essay.) There’s nothing stopping you from putting your sources up on the screen as you go — but there’s less pressure to do so. Since there’s no requirement for citation, and no standard for what that looks like, it’s easier for a video creator to fudge that sort of thing, and less likely that their audience will notice.

Second, there’s more going on in a video than there is in text. Video creators have more options for slipping in implications, interpretations, or just distractions because they have access to visual and audio effects that text doesn’t. They can communicate how they think you should feel about something through facial expressions and gestures without having to fully articulate why they think you should feel that way. They can take a quotation from a source they’re arguing against and read it in a silly voice so you don’t take it seriously. They can put little drawings up on the screen and play sound effects, and generally communicate a lot through implication.

An example of the “distraction” thing (and there are probably better ones, but i’m writing off the cuff here) — a few years ago, my cousin sent me a video she’d seen by a right-wing creator. In that video, they interviewed a number of people, and at one point they asked someone a question & got an answer they didn’t like. Rather than try and refute it or explain why they disagreed, they just played the Jeopardy theme while the person was talking and followed it with an error buzzer. In a traditional essay, you can’t just say “Wrong!” and then move on to your next point — I mean, technically you’re able to I suppose, your word processor isn’t going to punish you with an electric shock or anything if you do, but your readers will recognize that there’s supposed to be more there. And you definitely can’t present a quotation you disagree with and drown it out with music so it’s harder for your reader to follow what’s being said. Most video essayists don’t stoop to such things, I think, but the option is there in a way that it isn’t for text.

Third, if you want to try and fact-check a video, the actual process itself is noticeably more difficult than doing the same to text. Think of how frustrating it is when you’re Googling something and all the top results are videos. Why is that something people object to? It’s because watching a video takes longer than reading the same information in text form and it’s harder to quickly find the material you want, right? That same quality makes it harder to fact-check.

You want to fact-check a traditional essay? No problem. It’s a static format, all laid out in black and white on the page in front of you. You can read as quickly or slowly as you want, skipping backwards or forwards to certain points is trivially easy, and you can even print it out and highlight / annotate things. Video essay? You’re looking at hours upon hours of strategic pausing and rewinding if you want to do a quality job. Text is easy to search inside if you’re looking for a specific thing; video only has that function if the creator has included a full transcript with time stamps.

Now, again, I like video essays. They’re basically the only thing I watch on Youtube. And plenty of video essayists do cite their sources, and don’t try to use the medium to cheat on aspects of their argument, and even release full transcripts so you have it available in text form for ease of fact-checking.

But there also is a reason that a lot of bad-faith actors and propagandists gravitate towards video over text when they put out their material. The medium is far easier to abuse without your audience noticing. And I do think we have to be aware of that. The above poster is correct in that video essays are not a necessarily inferior medium. If an essayist is acting in good faith, their material is going to be just as valid in video l as it is in text, and their choice of format in no way reflects upon the content of the essay. But we have to be careful and not let ourselves assume that any preference for written essays over video essays is just snobbery. The video format, by its nature, has more space for bad actors and it’s important to remember that.

shall I have a hot take too? don't mind if I do