#more than just that tho if I'm being honest

[vanillarosekiss]

Preacher's Daughter | Southern Gothic AU

content warnings: none, apart from how SHIT this filler chapter is... ahh i'm super sorry i hate writing fillers but unfortunately i need to for this series. next one will be way more interesting tho!

word count: 0.7k

ii. RED DIRT BENEATH THE CROSS

By the morning, the wake had become a distant memory soaked into the damp earth on which the town was built on. Plates scarped clean and washed and put away. Just like that, with a silence following it so loud it rang in your ears.

But he was still there, encapsulated in your mind. Burnt into your vision.

Out back, near the edge of the cypress trees. Smoke curling from his mouth, hypnotic in a sense, emulating the movements of the devil your father had once told you stories of. The stories scared you, but he didn’t.

Your father said nothing about him – just nodded once to the man, out of politeness. You watched from the kitchen window, cross around your neck still warm and sticking to your chest from sleep.

There was red dirt on his boots. Not from your yard, though. From somewhere farther out.

The dingy motel was situated on the outskirts of the town, just past the gas station and … One long row of rooms, all painted the same sick shade of mint that constantly peeled at the corners. The neon sign out front hadn’t flickered in years, it just hummed in a low frequency, quiet and red. Like a warning.

His room was number 6.

You balanced the pie tin with both hands, its warmth bleeding into your fingers as you stepped carefully over the crackly pavement. The air hung low and was thick as ever. You were being kind, you thought. Nothing wrong with being kind. He was just interesting to you, a girl who had never been outside of her own town before.

You knocked, hands shaky and still holding the pie as you waited for an answer.

A mere half-minute later, the door clicks open, still on the latch, before it opens fully. The man from earlier stood there, sun striking down on his face, freshly clean shaven and bare. A cigarette hung from the corner of his mouth, smoke swirling upwards just past your own face. It smelt good. Intriguing. It was silent for a moment, before you introduced yourself as the preacher’s daughter.

“From the wake yesterday?”

A small exhale came from him, “Yeah, I remember.” He spoke in a strong accent, not American.

You held the plate out to him. “Brought you some pie,” you said, voice soft like rose petals.

He looked at it, and then at you. His gaze lingered on you a little more than necessary.

“You always bring strangers dessert?” he asked, voice deep and smooth, like molasses.

You shrugged, but your throat was tight. “Just had some spare, thought you might want it?” Lie.

There’s a pause, but then, he takes the plate from you, fingers brushing against yours.

“Thanks.”

Before he managed to step back inside, you spoke.

“Oh! I never got your name.”

A few seconds went. Slowly. Too slowly.

Just before you turned to leave and call it quits, he answered lowly.

“Simon.”

You held a brief gaze with him for a second, before nodding slightly and backing away from the door as he closed it.

You didn’t see him again that night.

The following morning, you were in town picking up a few pieces for the kitchen when the voices started, not aimed at you but leaking from the corner booth of an open diner. The women always seemed to be sitting there, fanning themselves with cheap fabric fans and picking at their food just as picked apart the town’s business.

“Just showed up at the wake without saying who he was!”

“Military, I bet. He has that stiff way about him. Not too harsh on the eyes, if I’m honest.”

“Just passing through, maybe?”

You lingered by the cash register, pretending to read a lottery sign that was pinned to the counter. Your stomach twisted around something you hadn’t eaten. It was unsettling.

Simon wasn’t from here, that much was clear. But military? That was something else. A silent man like him must have something about him he doesn’t want to let on. It scared you, a bit, but it was also a point of interest. Why this town out of all the places in America?

You struggled to come up with any reason why a man like him would be here. He sure didn’t look religious. It ate away at you all night, took up your mind all day and then invaded your unconscious state. Something had changed since he arrived, and you weren’t sure what, but the air felt somewhat different.

Strange.

Tag list 𖠋: @punkkture @slut-lmao @sebastianstans-slut @ilikeoldmen @g1rlfa1lure0 @queenoflaflames @tmartin0918 @kkloubee @goldie-221 @patricksoulmate @writingandsins @mxnii777 @bittersweetfig @mlthree @cupidswan @siphon07 @decaffeinateddelusionbread @kiss4tell @kylies-love-letter

[lilllithdraagon]

Fanfiction Fridays

it has been done. New chapter of The Path Not Taken is up. (It's porn) WOOT!🥳🥳

Since it's been a while, description and tags under the cut.

The Path Not Taken (210871 words) by Heldpeach, LilllithDraagon Chapters: 37/? Fandom: Dragon Age: Inquisition, Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death Relationships: Other Relationship Tags to Be Added, Solas/Original Female Character(s), Solas (Dragon Age)/Original Character(s), Original Female Character/Original Female Character, Herald of Andraste & Original Female Character, Zevran Arainai/Orignal Character(s), Felassan (Dragon Age)/Original Character(s), Zevran Arainai/Felassan/Original Female Character(s), Felassan (Dragon Age)/ Zevran Arainai, Minor or Background Relationship(s) Characters: Original Female Character(s), Solas (Dragon Age), Other Character Tags to Be Added, Varric Tethras, Kitty (Dragon Age), Cassandra Pentaghast, Original Inquisitor Character(s) (Dragon Age), The Iron Bull (Dragon Age), Sera (Dragon Age), Vivienne (Dragon Age), Zevran Arainai, Felassan (Dragon Age) Additional Tags: Canon-Typical Violence, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Unreliable Narrator, Tags May Change, Blood and Gore, Eventual Romance, Romance Secondary to Plot, Modern Girl in Thedas, MGiT, Modern Character in Thedas, Slow Burn, Dark Shit is Dark, They almost die a lot, It only gets more unhinged as you go, Major character death - Freeform, Ocs are musicians, they're all idiots, trust the tags, Dubious Morality, Fake Pregnancy, Fake Miscarriage, allusions to rape, gross and dumb plans, it's not dumb if it works, Angst, Heavy Angst, Depression, reference to suicide, Flirting, Also all the sexual tension known to man, Swearing, Music, don't do drugs, this has TV show formula, It Just Does, i don't make the rules, who paused the slow burn?, fake lovers to real lovers, Smut, Bondage, Threesome - F/M/M, Zevran sandwich, Polyamory, Topping from the Bottom, soft dom Series: Part 1 of Worth It Summary: Use of Australian Spelling Added Cover Art 7/11/2023 {Do you ever get that feeling of wanderlust? Like you want to travel but nowhere quite evokes the emotions you want? Sometimes, I have this yearning for home, the place my heart belongs. I left pieces of my heart in Thedas, though I���ve never been there in person… In Haven, in Skyhold, in Crestwood. And travelling to those places always feels like I’ve found myself again. For what is home but the first place you run towards when your soul is weary? A heart doesn’t know the difference between reality and fiction} - LillithDraagon. All Stories must start somewhere. Two Australian women are suddenly transported to the world they have only seen through a screen. Containing their excitement at their fresh start, they must face this new world and all of the dangers within it. It won’t be easy by any means. Especially not when they find themselves embroiled in the events of Dragon Age Inquisition. What fate awaits them? Will their new lives be worth the struggles they face? (Asterisks mark smut chapters.) !!!NOT A SELF INSERT!!! (lmfao) Part 1 is complete. Part 2 is currently being posted weekly.

[colorisbyshe]

i don't even care when my friends are late in terms of like... making plans and them not being on time (unless our plans are super time sensitive and the lateness eats into that or means canceling)

but it is irritating when it's not communicated to me cause if i know you left late or aren't ready yet, i can dick around and chill out, but if you don't communicate it at all it's like... okay now i'm the jackass sitting around and waiting... this is especially bad when we're meeting somewhere so i look like i've been dumped just standing there or sitting in my car

like i understand some delays can't be helped (traffic) but even then... dictate a text or some shit. an incoherent voice-to-text message is better than just leaving me hanging

[campingwiththecharmings]

Neon lights is one of my favorite Santi fics I’ve ever read. It’s amazing and so are you. I eat up all your work. I think you might be my favorite writer on here, you got Santi’s voice down so well. I can practically here him speaking

omg i'm

thank you so much for taking the time to send this, nonnie. i can't even begin to tell you how much it means to me. 🥺💖

[netscapenavigator-official]

Anyway. Since my dabble into WEBP, I've discovered that WEBP is actually considered a last generation format. I've also discovered that H.264 is ancient akin to the likes of JPEG, PNG, and GIF. So now I'm busy re-encoding all the videos on my Jellyfin server as AV1, and once that's done, I'm re-encoding all my photos as AVIF. If Shutter Encoder ever implements support for JPEG XL (JXL), then I'll be converting my photos again. There are no lengths I will not go to in order to save a few megabytes of storage space.

[zolo-san]

I know I just rambled in the tag, but if you took the time to read all that, might I direct you to this post & my ramblings there as well~

Something about Zoro being one of the most misunderstood and mischaracterized characters in One Piece is funny (not haha funny, funny sad) to me because?? That’s literally how his introduction starts?? With people misunderstanding him and thinking he’s some big, monstrous demon who kills with cause and cannot be trusted or tamed.

Meanwhile the actual Zoro is a driven guy who is often both literally and figuratively directionless in life and found his goals in life through good people (first Kuina and then Luffy). He's tied up in the Marine base not due to those actual crimes he commuted (well not inherently anyway) but because he ‘disrespected’ a Captain's son and stood up for a little girl. He accepts the challenge they present to him and because Zoro himself is a guy that puts his money where his mouth is he assumes the Marines will uphold their end of the deal and let him go (note the actual shock when Koby tells him the truth)

He joins Luffy's crew but also outright says he’s not gonna let his goal take second place to Luffy or anyone else's for that matter, he bears the weight of two people's dreams, his heart isn’t going to be swayed by some pirate.

Speaking of Kuina, her impact and influence on Zoro's life isn’t talked about enough for my liking. She was Zoro's first friend, his first rival, his first goal. He looked up to her so much and his reaction to her passing cracks my heart in half every time because you can seem him just..go numb. Kuina, dead? Kuina, the strongest person he knows, gone? Kuina, who swore to him just yesterday they’d race to the top of the world together, doesn’t exist anymore. His blank face only cracking within the privacy of his sensei before he begs. He begs on his knees, tears streaming down his face please please please let me take Kuina's sword with me. Let me take our dream to a high neither of us could imagine. I won’t let her name die here.

On top of gaining the Wado Ichimonji that day Zoro also gained…fear. Not of death, well at the very least not his own, he gained his fear of not being enough. Kuina kicked his ass every way a person could and still died, what could someone like him do? So he trains…and trains…and trains some more. Overly, obsessively, constantly telling himself he’s not enough, he’s weak, he can’t protect anyone like this and everyone's death would be on him.

As for Zoro being cold and stoic that’s just…not completely true? He’s not stone, he can be excited or sad or angry just as much as most characters he just sucks at showing it canonically (Kuina thinks he hates her before their final fight after all). Sure he’s not as forthcoming about it as some of the other Strawhats but Zoro's more of an action guy anyway, he'll show his love with his protection and unwavering faith.

In conclusion, Zoro is a ridiculously stubborn, incredibly loyal, mildly emotionally constipated, do what you say/say what you mean kinda guy.

(Also that whole ‘Zoro would kill the whole crew if Luffy asked him to’ thing? Top ten stupidest things I’ve ever heard from the fandom and that’s saying a lot. He’s loyal not brainless and heartless guys if Luffy asked him to do that, he would never but I digress, Zoro would square the fuck up with him so fast. DPMO.)

[sheepinthebigcity]

i kinda wish there was more of a community of people outside the demographic of baby shows who watched them to the extent that they could be compared and contrasted and ranked, and not just 20-somethings watching bluey because they're into bandit

[neigepomme]

˙ ✩°˖ 🐦‍⬛ wounded / sylus x reader

synopsis; when sylus takes a hit for you and ends up unable to heal himself, you take it upon yourself to patch him up — but not without some tough love first.

🍎 pomme's notes - MY FIRST SYLUS PIECE! REJOICE!! CALEB LEFT MY HEAD

⋆ 500 words / fluff / reader is gender neutral (doll is used as a petname tho!) / 2nd person

"ouch sweetie, a little softer please? you know i'm not one to have masochistic tendencies."

"stupid and injured idiots don't get to speak right now."

sylus almost teases your reddened cheeks but decides to hold his tongue for once when he catches your glare. sighing dramatically, he puts on his most hurt voice.

"i rescue my precious kitten from a dangerous hit, and i get violently patched up in return. all's not so fair in love and war, it turns out."

you squint your eyes at him and give him a small huff in response. you weren't weak at all. for heaven's sake, you're one of the most competent hunters at the association, and yet, sylus still treats you as if you were made of glass.

you were handling it just fine. sure, you might've gotten a bit of a strained shoulder if that wanderer hit you, but you didn't need sylus to bear the brunt of the hit — you didn't need him to be injured for your sake.

you meet his curious gaze, misty eyes betraying your anger. you weren't mad at him, honestly. well maybe just a little. you were upset at how nonchalant he was about this whole thing, when his stupid ability didn't even fully heal him and you had to manually patch him up.

tightening up the bandage wrapped around his waist, you smack his chest lightly before straddling his lap and nuzzling your face in his neck.

"you're so stupid, sy. the stupidest of them all. i could've handled it."

oh. he gets it now.

with a soft chuckle, he wraps his arms around you. you trembled in his embrace a bit, holding on just a hint tighter than usual. you were scared for him. scared you'd lose him. what a precious and lovely little thing you are, he thought.

"i'm strong, doll. and before you say anything, i know you're strong. the strongest person i've ever met — but i wasn't going to let you get hurt, was i?"

sylus hears you sniffle a bit, clearly still shaken up and in need of more convincing. reaching up to cup your face, his gaze softens as he looks at you like you're the most beautiful jewel he's ever laid his eyes upon (and you might just be). you inhale shakily before speaking.

"i know you're strong sylus, but you're not invincible. your ability didn't even heal you this time around! i got scared when your wound wasn't closing back up — i don't want to lose you."

his heart was beating faster than usual at how sweet and honest you were being right now. you didn't need his usual bravado and he wasn't going to make you more worried than you already were, so he just wiped away a stray tear and pressed a soft kiss to your cheek.

"i'm sorry, kitten. i'll be more careful next time, i promise."

sylus' precious, darling of a partner. he would tease you about your worrywart nature another day. right now, feeling the warmth of your body against his, and your hands softly stroking the hair at the nape of his neck was enough.

maybe getting hit wasn't so bad, if it meant seeing you like this.

🍎 pomme's final notes - sylus came home instead of rafayel during his bday banner and im kinda still angry at him so um. WOE! fictional injury for the purpose of a fanfic be upon ye

[dunmeshistash]

Okay I think I'm ready to write the second part of this post about Milsiril

To make it easier for me I'll just divide this into her relationship with Kabru, Mithrun and Helki (her ex-canary prisoner teammate)

First about Kabru

This is an extra from the daydream hour 5. The caption says "Something like this might as well have happened" so its probably not canon but could be. I honestly think his reaction to Milsiril visiting and being overbearing says a lot about the type of relantionship they have. This is the fakest bitch in the whole of dungeon meshi, he never says what he trully thinks unless there's an advantage to doing so, he's a people pleaser that does and says anything to make people like/trust him. And yet he immediatly converts into "Mooooooom you're embarassing meeeeee" when he sees it's Milsiril.

This translation used "Mom" but as I understand the original he uses the more formal version so I think it would be closer to "Mother" but still he acknowleges her as his Mother, and he acts like her kid in every interaction we see between them.

I really don't understand where the idea that he learned to be fake from being "forced" to be her adoptive son comes from.

(Continuing under a cut)

The other interaction we see between them is the Kabru extra from the Adventurer's Bible

Kabru comes to her with a deep fear he clearly has had even before she adopted him, he trusted her with this fear and she did not disappoint him, she comforted him and then gave him the information he needed to believe what she was saying

I'd also like to point out in no moment she discouraged him from calling his his bio-mom "Mom". He also says she taught her children everything they asked

I doubt this would only be true for him, it also mirrors something she said in the manga

"You can go ahead and learn all you want about something else." I believe it when Kabru says she made every effort to answer her children's questions. I think this is also the way she expresses the love she has for them. Plus I love the thought bubble with Kabru mirroring what he learned from her. I also love this daydream hour, she sacrifices her own comfort to do something for Kabru.

Milsiril isn't a perfect mother tho, besides the fact she is overprotective she comes from a very different culture from her children. I like to call her Kabru's white mom cause I think that would be the real world equivalent. This extra is the one I think the most about showing this context perfectly

Kabru wants to share Utaya sweets but looks at his mom looking gloomy/rejected so he talks about fruitcake instead. This very rude for Milsiril to do since she's kinda trying to overwrite his actual cultural background, but I think its done more as a "I want you to like the things I like" rather than something nefarious, and once again Kabru doesn't hide at all his distaste for it, he does the bare minimum to please his mom since she's being dramatic but he doesn't lie to her, he shows how displeased he is about fruitcake, something he refuses to do when eating the harpy omelette that is way worse, because he must make a good impression for Laios. Kabru is honest with his overbearing white mom once again.

Now a little about Rin, from Kabru's context, this is her extra in the Adventurer's Bible

(look at Helki he's such a gremlin i love him) anyway, Rin has a trauma about elves, they really mistreated her so she hates them, but when they notice she isn't thriving they go to Milsiril for help (Helki specifically I'll talk more about him next). I think this indicates she really has a better understanding of short lived kids, her kids are thriving differently from the ones the other elves try to care for. I'd also like to remember she lives secluded from other elves so while Kabru probably had lots of interactions with elves during his life, most of it was probably spent with Milsiril and her other adoptive kids. She also asks Kabru if he would do this to help Rin, he isn't being forced or anything, I also think it's good that Milsiril knows she cant take in any more kids, this to me shows she's worried about the quality of life her kids have. That is all to say, Rin is the one with elf trauma, not Kabru, because Kabru had Milsiril to shelter him from them.

Helki

This will be short and sweet since there's barely anything about Helki, he's her prisioner companion from her time in the canaries, but he was pardoned after Utaya, it says so in the Canarie's Structure page in the new adventurer's guide but I cant really find it translated again... so here's google's machine translation (I remember it saying "Retired and pardoned as a reward after Utaya", something like that)

so officially he isn't a prisoner anymore, but I think he still works as a canary, even so he and Milsiril seem quite close, he is the one to go talk to her about Rin, He is there when she's training Kabru (both laughing at Kabru and then participating). I saw people theorizing she stays close to him because he is also someone who she can feel superior to, but I don't believe it at all, he's STILL in contact with her even after they have nothing to with each other, I think they really have a friendship, and there's no point where it seems like she feels like she's better than him or that he's less than her, people seem to interpret Milsiril and her relationships in the worst possible ways every time and I don't understand why.

This segways into Mithrun

I've also seen people assuming she only got close to Mithrun because now he needs her and has no power over her, once again with the theory that Milsiril surrounds herself with people she can feel superior to. But once again, Milsiril had a change of perspective about Mithrun after seeing his Dungeon

Rather than she feeling superior to him I think rather she realized he was just like her. (And I think she's friends with Helki for a similar reason, it's probably easier to see him as an equal than other nobles)

I've also seen this part used as proof of that. "He said that you've got suspicious ulterior motives and that I shouldn't listen to you" as if that's true, but this is past Mithrun, the one that didn't trust anyone and thought ill of all his teammates, ofc he doesn't believe someone would help him without an ulterior motive. This doesn't prove much about her real motivations.

Also before she showed up, Mithrun was being cared for by servants hired by his brother, he isn't someone helpless she has power over, he is still a member of an important Noble family that has a caring brother providing for him, he can do without Milsiril, he had done without her for 20 years before Utaya happened and she quit the Canaries.

This is all to say I think Milsiril is just a white(elf) adoptive mom doing her best, I don't see much of anything nefarious about her or her motivations, she is flawed as all the dunmeshi characters are, she isn't a perfect mom, she isn't an evil mom, she's just a person.

Elves in general also see short lived species as "children" so I imagine this makes her "You'll always be my baby" attitude way worse, she really treats pre-teen/teen Kabru like he's a toddler sometimes. But she also respected him enough to go all out in training him. I think they're a family with everything that entails.

PS: I didn't get much into Interracial adoption since this is something that happens irl too and I don't know much about all the issues that entails, but in the end, in this case, it seems like a net positive for the kids she adopts considering all we see about how she raised Kabru.

[marsprincess889]

Vedic astrology observations

Part 8

Section one: Appearance focused, all genders

1. If biological men/people who were born as men/masculine people have downturned eyes, you can bet they have a Mercury nakshatra in their big three.

Ashleshas tend to have darker and sharper eyes, but blue eyes are also common with them. Their gaze is the most personal out of all Mercury nakshatras.

Jyeshtas can actually have doe eyes but they also clearly convey their sharp intelligence, so they're not the kind of doe eyes that look naive. There's something strong and honest about their eyes. They can also have darker eyes but it's less frequent than among Ashlesha natives. Blue or Green eyes are more common with them.

Revatis almost always have blue eyes. If Ashlesha eyes are sharp and intense, and Jyeshta's are honest but intelligent, Revati eyes are wise and kind, and often, famously, mischevious. They might also have a natural smirking/laighing face or a twinkle in their eyes. This is one of the nakshatras that is easy to spot if you've seen a lot of them. Do not confuse their eyes with Ashwini's blue eyes tho. If the eyes look kind and deep despite the coldness, they're a Revati. If the eyes look blank and cold, they're Ashwini. That's how I see it after looking at natives of both.

2. Pushya people, especially men/masculines, have a resting happy face🙂. It's like, if someone got numb from smiling and their face stayed like that naturally😭 hope this makes sense. Feminine/Women who have Pushya in big three are often not that expressive appearance-wise, but Pushya men have REALLY expressive facial movements and sort of emotional expressions, especially if they're conveying sadness, fear or concern. Cancer rashi for you lol.

3. Elephant yonis (Bharani and Revati) and Vanar yonis (Purva Ashadha and Shravana) very often have ears that stick out slightly or more. Elephant yonis look good with their hair pulled back from their forehead as a result. I have not seen the same trend in Vanar yonis, I think with them the ears aren't as noticable. I actually like ears like that, I hope none of you who have one or more of these nakshatras get insecure about it, I'm one of you lol.

4. Punarvasu women/feminines might have either strong and healthy-looking bodies or really thin/dainty bodies. There's not much more I wanna say to this, this is really to the point and self-explanatory.

Section two: other/general

1. A lot of interpretations of planets in houses that I found online tend to be shallow and consequently, innacurate. One example I can use is Venus in the 10th house, which I have, and often that placement has these consistent descriptions:

Married to work/career

Meeting a spouse through work or career

Having an older spouse

Being cold or detached towards love

I have to say that these are extremely misleading. I never saw myself as an extremely work or career oriented person. I've also observed other people with this placement and here's what I actually think it means:

Not "married" to work or career(work isn't even 10th house, it's 6th house), but having a pleasant/lovely reputation, making it easier to navigate career.

The "meeting a spouse through work or career" part is the one I have not seen verified. There is nowhere I found that says that Venus represents how you meet your spouse. Besides, Venus only represents spouse for people who identify as male.

Having an older spouse might be true but again, mainly for males.

"Being cold or detached towards love" is not necessarily true. Venus in the 10th house person projects an agreeable, polite and charming behavior but maintains boundaries and distance. It might be hard for them to find people who connect to a deeper part of them and don't just want to be around that pleasant attitude, others might actually not be able to discern that that "pleasantness" is for everyone and not their true, internal nature (not that they can't actually be like that). Whether or not the native is actually cold or detached in love is dependant on other things. For example, I have moon in the 8th, which is almost all you need to know about my attitude towards personal and intimate relationships: I am loyal and intense once commited, but otherwise, it's hard for me to trust and open up. I also have protective tendencies that can manifest as isolation or secrecy.

2. As much as Ketu nakshatras can acquire power, they may not use it intelligently, responsibly, or for good. So, people who depend on them NEED to double(or triple or quadruple) check everything said Ketu native says. I've seen this so many times. A Ketu in big three person is looked up to naturally due to their energetic heat and self-reliance and people trust them before others, evsn if there's evidence against them. If you have Ketu in big three, you might not be aware of that potential in you. It is important for Ketu natives to emphasize facts and evidence. Otherwise, there's a high chance they're leading others and themselves into ignorant falsehood. (Ketu+Jupiter combination in big three can be extremely dangerous in particular. Ketu+ Venus is probably the most grounded and realistic combination)

3. Uttara Phalguni natives are really underappreciated, especially Uttara Phalguni moons. They are very generous while lifting up people around them, but might get treated in an underwhelming or dissapointing way in return. There's a common trope with Uttara Phalguni women that I want to publish on my Patreon (with examples in famous media, if I finally get the guts to launch it, I need support here guys, tell me you're intrigued😭).

4. Krittika women are soft firecrackers. They know their worth and have their own integrity but it's more vulnerable, because it is the birth of Sun, so, they might be a little agressive, but only in moments. Uttara Phalguni and Uttara Ashadha are fixed/stable in nature. They're more integrated in their Solar nature (does not mean that they're better or represent the Sun more) and have no need to be as defensive as Krittika. Krittika is mixed/both soft and sharp (the only other mixed nakshatra is Vishakha_ the nakshatra sitting opposite it), so it's nurturing and defensive, which matches nicely with its theme of fire_ the element that helps to warm up, cook and alchemize but also can burn.

I have multiple ideas for my Patreon posts: medieval Christian symbolism connected to one nakshatra and the spirituality of that nakshatra, analyzing childhood classics(for girls😭 mostly) with nakshatras, analyzing Jane Austen's work with her nakshatras and nakshatras of her characters' portayals in media and, as I said, a common trope of Uttara Phalguni women. Please comment or let me know otherwise which one you are most interested in.

Have a beautiful day🤍🤍🤍

[dokyumms]

make it right

pairing: the8 x gn 14thmember!reader

genre: angst, fluff

word count: 1k

cw: arguments, making up, minghao is mean, the beach has nothing to do with the fic i just couldn't find any other pics.

a/n: another request finished! will begin writing a long fic soon... be scared... but enjoy this for now my kings even tho the end is kind of bad

it started off as an innocent, simple practice day.

sure, you were struggling a little, but you cut yourself some slack for being sick the day before.

"okay! let's cut it off here, good job everyone!" the choreographer announced with a quick reminder to hydrate and some other stuff that you tuned out. when he finished, everyone said their thank yous and started packing up. you too, began to gather all your belongings when someone tapped you on the shoulder.

turning around, you smiled to see that it was minghao.

"need something?" you asked, getting up and slinging your bag onto your shoulder.

"no, i just noticed you were having trouble on that dance break earlier. would you want to stay back a bit? i could help." he offered.

to be fully honest, you just wanted to go home; your body ached and you were still partially recovering from your fever. but on the other hand, you didn't want to seem lazy, so thinking it wouldn't take too long, you drop your bag on the floor.

"sure, a couple runs wouldn't hurt," you replied, walking toward the center of the room.

"you're not going yet?" chan asked as he made his way to the door.

you shook your head, "just need to fix the dance break, shouldn't take more than 20 minutes,"

he nodded, a little unsurely, but after seeing that minghao was there with you, he left.

however, those 20 minutes soon turned to 45.

you wiped your forehead with the back of your sleeve, catching your breath. "one more time?" you asked, though the exhaustion in your voice made it sound more like a plea than a suggestion.

minghao was already hitting 'play' on his phone, muttering, "if you can actually get it this time," under his breath.

you could barely hear him, but the comment made your stomach twist. you understood his frustration, everyone was getting this except you- and you were supposed to be one of the best dancers in the group. so, determined to get it right, you focused as the music started again, filling the empty space between you two.

but just as you felt the dance break begin, something was off. your timing, your footwork- something. and before you could fix it, minghao had already stopped.

"seriously?" he ran a hand through his hair, frustration seeping into his voice. "do i need to slow it down again? how are you still messing it up?"

the words stung more than they should've. you clenched your jaw, taking a slow breath. "i just need a second, okay? i'm trying."

"we've done this like ten times already, were you not paying attention to anything i said?"

"wow, thanks for the encouragement."

"the music video filming is coming up. if you mess up this much during it, we'll be there all day."

"you think i don't know that? maybe if you stopped nitpicking every little thing, i'd be able to focus."

"i'm 'nitpicking' because i care about this routine. unlike you, i actually want us to do well."

you were taken aback, going silent for a second.

"what? so you think just because i'm struggling means i don't care? why do you think i'm still here?"

minghao doesn't respond, so you kept going,

"i could've went home you know, i don't even need to be here at all! we both know that with maybe another day, i'd probably get it, but you said you'd help me, so i stayed and what do you do? forget it. i'm going home."

and with that, you packed up your things again and left, leaving minghao stunned.

you didn't think he'd show up to your shared apartment that night, probably crash with jun or something, but then you heard the door creak open.

keeping your eyes closed, you intently listened to minghao shuffle around, open a couple drawers, then leave.

huh, so he only came back for clothes? but then you heard another door close and rushing water only a minute later.

well, guess he was really deciding to stay over after that. you sighed, sitting up on the bed.

should you apologize so you both don't have to sleep angry? but you were definitely not apologizing for that. ugh, you hated trying to sleep next to a mad boyfriend, especially a mad minghao.

you considered just leaving the apartment and sleeping over at jeonghan's place, but you heard the shower turn off, so you plopped back into bed, shutting your eyes.

the door opened again, you tried your best to look like you were asleep, but you couldn't tell if it was working. you heard him sigh before saying, "i know you're awake,"

you don't even question how he know, "what about it?" you shot back, almost grimacing at your tone.

opening your eyes, you expected for minghao to shove you off the bed or ask you to move, but instead, an apology came from his mouth.

"i'm sorry, y/n. i really am. you were right, i was the one who offered to help, but i didn't and i'm sorry. i'll sleep on the couch, but i came here to apologize." he said, looking around the room as if he was a little kid apologizing to his mom.

you didn't respond, wondering if you should milk a little more from him. minghao would normally never apologize this early, being the stubborn guy he was. so when he turned around, you stopped him.

"wait- you mean it?" you asked. he nodded in response.

"okay, and?"

tilting his head, he tried to think of what else to say before sighing in defeat.

"and you're the best thing to happen to me, so i owe you dinner for the next week..."

"and?"

"you gotta be joking- and because i love you, i'll buy you that stupid $300 bag, now move so i can sleep,"

you complied, moving over so he can slip into bed. "you're impossible," he mumbled,

"and you're mean," you teased back. he chuckled lightly before wrapping himself around you. "i said i'm sorry," he whined.

"hmm, make it up to me?" you asked, puckering your lips at him. "no." he deadpanned, but after your face fell a little bit, he kissed you.

"no, don't make me buy you something else. we make the same salary, you know?"

"eh, you still get more gifts at fan signs than i do, but i'll let it slide." you replied, giving him another kiss before he nuzzled his head into your neck.

[zeropro]

Hi, what are your thoughts on Megatron? Most Starscream fans don't have very positive ones about him lol, but everyone is different and I would like to know that you think

I like Megatron okay, he doesnt bother me but im not like jumping up and down for megatron content yknow? but I get not liking Megatron as a Starscream fan. It's just, you can't deny how intrinsically the two characters are tied together. Really can't have Starscream without Megatron, which is unfortunate for someone like me who does not like drawing Megatron lol!

Maybe the reason most Starscream fans dont like Megatron is because of their abusive relationship? And let's be clear, due to the power imbalance, I do interpret it as an abusive relationship. Despite how much we like to joke that Starscream deserves the punishment he gets (I'm not entirely sure how attempted murder/political assassination attempts factor into an abuse allegory) no one ACTUALLY deserves to be abused. The fact that Starscream is low key also evil and has done evil things is a separate issue from Megatron's abuse of him, we can hold him accountable for the one while also having sympathy because of the other. For me personally tho? Megatron abusing Starscream doesnt make me dislike the character at all, it's honestly the main draw of the dynamic for me. Maybe I just like to see my blorbos suffer…

The G1 Cartoon Megatron is probably the most fun, and I think this dynamic is the most on the level in terms of Starscream dishing back as much as Megatron gives him. They're all just bullies on the playground, their toxic back and forths feel a lot more slap stick and silly than actual abuse. What makes it work I think is that Megatron is not as crazy powerful as he is in later continuities, and Starscream responds to the abuse like a cartoon villain, immediately bouncing back and plotting his revenge, so it's funny rather than upsetting! I also find it hilarious how Megatron is weirdly nice to all the other Decepticons who aren't Starscream lmao? G1 Cartoon Megatron is a 10/10 for me.

If G1 cartoon's Megatron and Starscream are more on an even playing field, Prime Megatron is like the opposite of that. Prime Megatron is so impossibly powerful it almost feels like no one has a chance against him in a fight, and Prime Starscream is so scrunkly and small it's almost laughable. I think I feel the most pity for Prime Starscream when he gets beat up by Megatron, but he almost always makes up for it by being possibly the most evil of the Starscreams. I like how in the third season, he genuinely seems happy to finally dedicate himself fully to Megatron, but you just know how much he'd been beaten down and broken over and over again to even get to that point. Good for him for trying to get revenge in the sequel series. As for Megatron himself, I think more often than not when I am reading fics I see Prime Megatron in my head, and it's his voice I hear. What can I say, it was the first Transformers show I watched haha. Do I love how his redemption arc was handled? Not particularly, it sorta came out of nowhere, felt really rushed, and he just goes away anyway so we don't even get anything out of it. I like redemption arcs in general, but I don't necessarily think this particular Megatron needed one.

To be perfectly honest, I didn't think the 2005 IDW Megatron deserved one either, only because when it comes to over powered, unstoppable, irredeemably evil Megatrons, this one ranked right up there if we take into consideration everything he did before Dark Cybertron. His redemption does kinda come out of nowhere. But like, idk mang! It's also really fun? Like, Bumblebee carrying him around cuz his pants got blown off is hilarious! Him actually upset at Bumblebee's death and then taking Bumblebee's Autobot badge and putting it on over his own was sweet! Him dealing with the crazy crew of the Lost Light is a lot of fun! And him actually having to confronting and deal with what he's done (and other characters dealing with him dealing with it) is a lot more interesting than just him dying. idk. The comics have been around for years by that point, and passed through the hands of many writers, so if a little handwaving and a little contrivance and a little suspension of disbelief is what is required for us to have an honestly pretty fun take on Megatron, I think I'm okay with that.

I do have one complaint tho, mostly based on content I haven't read yet so take it with a grain of salt. I have been told that the adjacent series to the Lost Light Megatron stuff covers Starscream's side of the story and that it does actually address his abuse at the hands of Megatron. My problem is that apparently (and again I haven't read that far yet so this is just hearsay, but apparently) the writers on the Lost Light Megatron stuff didn't get the memo so while Megatron feels bad for and is working at redemption for all the evil war stuff he did to everyone, the one thing he doesnt regret is apparently his treatment of Starscream? Haha, like come on! on the one hand it's really disappointing to me because id like the catharsis of Megatron’s remorse, but...on the other hand, I guess it's kinda true to life actually. Your abusers are people, and they can change and grow and become better, but it doesnt mean they will ever become better for you. It doesnt mean they will ever apologize or even feel bad for what they did. Maybe theres something to be said about having to move on and heal without that. I guess whether this is a complaint I maintain will depend on how its handled.

I get that some people don't think Megatron should ever get a redemption arch, because he's an abuser, a monster, a tyrant, and an evil warlord, and it's completely fair for your stance to be that he should just be killed and that would be justice. I personally really like continuities that treat him more like just some guy. I think Starscream put it best in 2005 IDW during Megatron's trial when he said Megatron wasn't some political genius or the most gifted strategist. He wasn't even the most evil man. In IDW, Megatron started out as a social advocate from the lower class, and despite the problematic narrative of "the bad guy had a point and just did advocacy wrong/went too far," I think the idea that Megatron kinda got swept up by his own hype and was used by people and powers more devious than he is a compelling one.

Starscream is Starscream, so who knows how much of what he says is true and how much is him lying, but this idea just rings true to me. It humanizes him. If handled well, I'm honestly not opposed to stories redeeming Megatron. I'm also not opposed to stories treating him like the devil and just killing him lol. I love a character that can do both!

Uh uh, what else. Earthspark Megatron is nice, I like him. There's...a bit of cognitive dissonance in trying to reconcile the things he chastises Optimus Prime for and the idea that he still was a ruthless warlord at one point, both of which continue to be left unexplored. Transformers One Megatron is neat, I was worried going in how they would handle the switch from Orion Pax's brother to lets start a 4-6 million year war, but like, I like the way he actually was super okay with accepting his lot in life. Like obviously he didnt like it but he didnt see a point in fighting it, and that adamant complacency as a coping mechanism is what lead to his feelings of rage and betrayal by the end. Also I think its hilarious how much younger he is from all the other Decepticon high command, especially Starscream XD.

I don't think I've read or watched anything else with Megatron in it. Man, I wrote a lot. At the end of the day, Megatron is a good character, I like the role he plays in Transformers, I'm not like actually that interested in him on his own but more what he brings to the table when considering Starscream's character. You can't have one without the other! Do I ship them? No, not really, no more than any other ship. But I'll still read Megastar stuff cuz sometimes you just want to watch two people be toxic and make it hurt so good. I'll always prefer Trine stuff anyway ha! Have fun out there!

[millersfinest]

untethered⁵ | e.w

00s!ellie williams & 00s!miller!reader

wc: 10.6k

series: chapter one, chapter two, chapter three, chapter four, chapter five (you're here!)

blurb: it’s been awhile since you’ve been back home; in upstate new york where you’ve spent most of your life waking up early and tending to the animals that moo’d and meh’d. after graduation high school, and then college, the city life has stolen most of your attention. enabling you to visit only a handful of times through the years. when your lovely adoptive parents (tommy and maria miller) invite you back for a thanksgiving dinner—a troubled old flame from your childhood manages to get your attention, despite its explosive ending.

cw: lmao flip phones, r and ellie NOT beating the cheating allegations, more use of y/n then i would prefer, she/her pronouns, vulgar language, some angst (not on ellie’s watch tho), fuckgirl!ellie (kind of), the millers, r is a writer (she doesn’t write much in this ch wink wink 3.0), using fuck as a conjunction word, ellie needs the reader bad, a few arguments sprinkled in, elements of longing, ellie is #1 lesbian yearner in the world, some early 2000s references, thanksgiving, r is very anxious, hella angst, the CAT may be out the bag (can mean many things), some adoption related turmoil, emotional cheating (from ellie), cute mother daughter moment, repressed emotions, lots of angst in this chapter, ellie is mean when she don't fw you, not a lot of reader x ellie in this ngl.

note: finally the 5th installment, hope it's worth the wait my lovely readers!!! i'm gonna be honest tho... this wasn't the most fun chapter to write (maybe cause the reader and ellie aren't as horny as i would prefer lmao), but the narrative shall prosper regardless of my feelings. this may or may not be the second to last chapter of this series. idk yet, i'm still planning right nowwww. i might post a poll soon to help decide. anyway, thank you guys for being super patient while i wrote this chapter, so without further ado... thousands of bisous ofc <3 and please enjoy this angsty ass chapter!!

Stood before you was a very disappointed looking Joel. His deep brown eyes squinted with fatigue and restlessness; arms crossed over his chest. At the alert of his presence, you shut your eyes trying to come up with some way to save yourself—even though there was none. It was laugh worthy, really.  

I don’t wanna assume nothin'… So, I suggest you start explainin’ what in the hell’s bell’s is goin’ on here.

You were unsure if his southern accent was stronger because of his disappointment, or if he just sounded like that when he was tired. But, either way, the question was valid. What the hell was going on?  

He called your name, snapping you from the rushing thoughts in your head. “Huh?” Those words came out of you more like a sound than words and letters. you were a child all over again, struggling under the fist of authority. Followed by a deep sigh, walking toward the counter, leaning your hands on the cool, smooth marble top. “Ellie and I are… Just catching up. S’all there is to it, Joel.”

He echoed a sigh, running his hand over his dark, graying hair and beard—he didn’t believe you. Not that you even tried to come up with a good enough lie that would be believable. “Now, Bug…” Joel began, shaking his head. “I know you’re not a liar; Tommy and Maria sure as hell didn’t raise you to be one—“  

“Joel, please—“

“If I heard what I think I heard… In that bedroom of yours. You and Ellie were doin’ a lot more than just catching up!” He whisper-yelled, careful not to disturb your parents upstairs. The man could barely keep eye contact with you, pointing his finger, accusingly. “She has a girlfriend who is in that guesthouse—“  

“I know, I know—“  

“Then, what the hell were you thinkin’?”  

You solemnly sigh, having your actions thrown back in your face. It sucked because he was right. “We… We have unfinished history. It just happened.”  

Joel scoffed, averting his brown eyes. “Things like that don’t just happen…”  

He was right—sex doesn’t just happen. There are steps that lead to that pleasurable event; it doesn’t just happen, and you knew that. But it was easier to say it that way. As if the two of you sleeping together, kissing each other was all acts of fate and prophecy. Something you had no control over. Even though, control was never stricken from you. If anything, you were always grasping for it.  

You chose to invite Ellie into your room, into your body, into your mind—you wanted her more than anything.  

That was something you couldn’t be sorry about.  

“Please, don’t tell my parents.” You almost squeaked out, looking up at him like a child charged with punishment. If Maria and Tommy found out about this, she’d have your head! And Tommy will be trying to talk her down—it would be a mess. At twenty-five, it wasn’t that you were afraid of your parents; you just didn’t want to disappoint them. “We need some time to figure this out…”  The fear that they would regret bringing you into their life weighed heavy on you.

With a raised eyebrow, he pursed his lips in thought. “Does Ellie plan on breaking things off with Cat?”  

“Yeah, not right away, but yeah.”  

“Not right away?”  

“Thanksgiving— she doesn’t wanna do it today with everything goin’ on. And they live together, so she has to arrange a few things…” You trail off, deepening your eyebrows with worry. “Oh, my God… Is she two-timing me? Is Ellie two-timing me?” Slapping your hands to your forehead, you squeezed your eyes shut. What the fuck. What the fuck. You repeated curses in your mind.  You were spiraling yourself into a stupor.

Joel walked around the corner, stabilizing you by placing his hands on your shoulders. “Ellie is many things, but she’s not a two-timer… All I’m saying is to handle this with caution. You’re hurting another person doing this—“  

“Fuck, Joel, I know… I don’t need the reminder.”  

“I’m gonna talk to her about this… About resolving this.”

You look at him with a pointed glare. “Resolving— there’s nothing to resolve. If everything goes according to plan—“  

He grunted, rolling his eyes. “Things like this never go to plan. Come on, Bug, you’re smarter than this… You know better.” Joel told, narrowing his eyes. He walked around the counter to you, to squeeze your shoulder. But that didn’t change the fact that his words stung.  

You know better.  

You did know better, but you acted anyway. Perhaps, it was a mistake; it was a mistake you were willing to ride on until it met its end. Which could be one of two things: complete and utter destruction, or… Happiness. Why was there such a large gap between those two endings?  

“Ellie,” He began, shaking his head, filling you with insecurity. “You know how she can be… Impulsive at times.” Joel pressed his lips into a line, looking past you, in thought. “I’m not even sure if she realizes the gravity of what she’s doing to her or you— not until it blows up in her face, which it will if you two keep it up.”

So, the both of you just had to work harder at hiding it. For now, at least.  

He rubbed his hand together, glancing his eyes up the stairs. “I won’t say anything to your parents… Just do a better job of keeping this to yourselves, please.” The older man prepared to head back up, but he looked at you one last time. “This isn’t me agreeing with what y’all are doin’— because I don’t. I don’t agree nor do I support cheating.” He exhaled, shaking his head, disappointingly. Feet nearing the steps to ascend back to his bedroom. “Just get it together.”  

Joel left you to gather your thoughts—but there was nothing to gather. Your mind was already made; you’ve already dug a hole for yourself. Seeing it through was the only option. Perhaps, the two of you had to shape up, though. Tommy even gave a side glance before you’d hopped off the porch to grab the wine; Ellie needs to be more careful. And so do you.  

Shutting out the lights, you heavily creeped back up the stairs to your bedroom. The dim bedroom that had the remnants of your lover minced in the air… And under your pillow. Grabbing your laptop from the charger, you arranged your pillows to support your back—that’s when you noticed the red and white striped boxer shorts Ellie left behind. Even though, you purposely threw them at her to put on before you parted from one another.  

Holding out the underwear that was marked with arousal, you threatened to smell it. Truly. But, before you could, your conscience got the best of you. Wasn’t it creepy to smell someone’s underwear? Let alone, a woman's... Instead, you stuffed it in the box you kept under your bed—which, very well, could’ve been worse.  

Feeling the need to tell Ellie of their pending situation with Joel, you logged onto MySpace. There was a small green circle that appeared on her icon. She was already online.  

BugsWritersRoom: Hey… Just ran into Joel. Not great.  

There wasn’t a much of a long wait before she responded.  

StarlightWilliams: duck what happened?  

StarlightWilliams: fuck*  

Her correction made you chuckle.  

BugsWritersRoom: He heard us. That’s what happened.  

BugsWritersRoom: We have to do better. Stop making everything so obvious…

BugsWritersRoom: At least, until you break up with Cat.  

There was a long pause in her responses. Longer than you’d anticipate her response would take.  

StarlightWilliams: noted.

Ellie’s response was dryer than you expected it to be, but the fatigue washing over you forbid you from investigating it.

Shutting your laptop, you nuzzled into your pillows with the auburn-haired artist on your mind. It was only right that you gave the relationship another chance; if it inevitably ends, you just hope it would be less explosive than last time. Amicable. Where the two of you could actually stand to be around each other after the fact.

If you had it your way, though, you’d never want to part from her again. It was easy to believe that Ellie was your person. Somebody who was only perfect for you. In a world of feeling nothing, she made you feel something more than lust or forced romanticism.  

When morning came, you were exhausted as fuck, to say the least. Awakened by your programmed alarm, and a blaring rooster that didn’t know how to shut the hell up after his first few yodels.  

Meandering down the stairs, you were told to speed through the morning chores, to begin help with the cooking, which you didn’t mind. However, Ellie wasn’t there for the spiel. Joel had appeared, saying that she was going to be little late. At the sight of him, you couldn’t help but be struck with anxiety. Although, he looked and acted the same as he always did.

Either way, you fed the chickens, groomed, and fed the horses—and that’s when she found you. Brushing Tokyo and feeding fresh carrots to keep him entertained and focused. He was a horse who only responded to pleasantries; Tokyo was a man of high honor. “Someone’s bein’ a good horse.” Ellie cooed, approaching you and Tokyo with her hands stuffed in the pockets of her jeans.

There was something off about her demeanor. Her shoulders were stiffened, cheeks flushed enough to insinuate an altercation. In addition to that pinched line between her thick eyebrows.  

There definitely was one, but she wasn’t going to admit that to you. Joel and Ellie were officially on bad terms—but she said nothing about that because she doesn’t want to alarm you.  

“Where were you this earlier? I thought I was helping you get in routine for your new farmhand position…” You tossed the brush aside, crossing your arms over your chest. Ellie didn’t stop walking until her body collided with yours. Hand finding a comfortable place along your jaw, preparing to pull you in toward her lips. Placing two fingers over her lips, you pull back. “What the hell are you doing?” You chuckle, looking around for any unwanted eyes.

Her hands slid down you arms, shoulder slumping. “What part of we need to do better do you not understand?” You questioned, looking intently into her dilated eyes.

Ellie ran a hand over her hair, sighing, tiredly. “What is wrong with you?” You press, deepening her eyebrows.  Suddenly feeling the need to comfort her.

The truth was, she was stressed. Joel had stressed her out. He found out about them and was pressing Ellie to tell Cat about it—or break up with her because she deserves to know the truth. But, today, Cat woke up like the happiest person alive, which was off brand for her. She showered Ellie with kisses she didn’t want and hopped up to make breakfast for them. It was weird, but she was happy; Ellie doesn’t want to ruin that. She just wanted to linger in the happiness that was the memory of your lips on hers.

“I just woke up feelin’ funky— it’s nothing…” She looked down, twisting her foot into the sprawled hay over the ground. “A kiss could help my condition, though…” Ellie raised a scarred brow, lips curling at the end.  

Pressing your lips into a line, you look over her shoulder than yours—making sure there aren’t any prying or peeving eyes. “Just one…” You mutter, pulling her close by the material of her unzipped jacket. She smirked against your lips, moving them in sync with yours.

The tenseness in her muscles loosened and relaxed under your touch, as she released a breath of fresh air against your face through her nose. Placing her soft, yet calloused hand at the curve of your jaw. Ellie made the kiss deeper by dragging her tongue against your bottom lip, begging for more—but you pulled away. She chased your lips, causing you to giggle as you turned your face. “I have a full plate this morning… I could use your help— as long as you stay focused!” You prodded your index finger at her chest. “Plus, it’ll help for when it’s just you on the farm.”

“Oh, I can stay focused.” She crossed her arms, overzealously.  

“Okay,” You snicker. “Well, why don’t we split up to cover more ground?”  

Her features fell. “Split up? Hey, I didn’t agree to splitting up.” Ellie pouted, taking a step closer to you. Playing with the frayed hem of the flannel sticking out from under your jacket.  

Splitting up was the best course of action, so you could begin helping your mother in the kitchen—because you know she needs it. Unless Cat’s planning to take your place on that front. Anyway, them splitting up could help their developing case with Joel. You want to prove to him that you’re as smart as he think you are. That you’re not blindly love struck by a destructive idea—that the words he told you meant something. And, in a way, helping Ellie with her impulsivity.  

“It’s for the best, Els. You get to put to work what you learned these past few mornings— so it’ll really stick.” You spoke, positively. “And there’s another half of the farm that you’re inexperienced with… So, it’s better if I just run through it alone.” You nod with a friendly smile on your lips. Almost too friendly.  

“Hm…” Ellie hummed, peering around the horse barn.  

“I already did half the work; the chicken’s and horses are already fed. I’m, basically, done with grooming Tokyo— just detangle his mane and tail, and do that same process with Sarah, which should be easy because she’s still a baby and barely has any hair.” You rambled like a professional farmer. It truly was muscle memory getting back into the chores.  

“Wait, what’s the process…?”  

“There’s a bucket of soap and water,” You point to the bucket at door of the horses’ space. “Use that to help with the brushing and detangling. That’s the process. Don’t worry about the horse shoes— my dad does all that.” You waved your hand, then reached into your coat to grab the notepad. Ripping the thin paper from the rings, you hand it over. “After this, all you have left is the garden. So, whenever you’re done, come find me.”  

Ellie took the note paper from your hands, plucking it with her fingers. “Uhm, if I have any questions…? What if I do something wrong?”  

You sighed, snatching the paper back from her. “Trust yourself. You’ve done this before, Ellie. But if you have any questions… Here’s my cell. I have it on me.” You scribble down your phone number, handing it back to her.  

She giggled, taking the paper back. “You just gave me your digits…” Ellie teased, dangling the page in front of you.  

“For professional purposes only.” You winked, before leaving her to finish the horse grooming.  

When you skipped away, Ellie didn’t quite know how to take your place. After finishing up Tokyo, walking him to his open space to grift along with the other horses, Sarah was next. And you failed to mention that she was a bit of runner when it came to retrieving her.  

It’s been made clear that she was already fucking up—said by Joel Miller—so, she didn’t want to fuck up the only job she had. The job you gave her.  

So, instead of moping and overthinking the words of her adoptive father, she looked to that lined notebook paper as if it were the Bible. Ellie couldn’t let you down over something as specific as farming chores. These were living beings. If she failed to do this correctly, you may never fall into her how she hoped

Meanwhile, you hustled cows and goats, hastily. Rain boots splashing into mud and manure, leaving marks along its battered rubber soles. Tucked into your back pocket, your phone began to vibrate, sounding off the ringtone of your choosing. Without glancing at the caller ID—assuming it was Ellie. You pressed the phone button.  

“Calling already?” You raised an eyebrow, while monitoring the chaotic goats around you. They were competitive eaters who’d rather trample over one another to eat their food, than stand by for their own servings. You scold them under your breath, pushing them off each other.  

“You want me to come to dinner tonight, or not?” She snickered on the other side of the line.  

“Oh, Abby, hey… Sorry that was meant for someone else— it’s been a long morning.” You pinched the bridge of your nose, shaking your head. “Yeah, I still want you to come. What’s up?”  

Abby laughed, yawning. Did she just wake up? “When’s your family having dinner tonight— wanna make sure I’m planning accordingly.” There was raspiness to her voice that was soothing to your ears.  

Rubbing a hand over your forehead, you thought. It was basically undetermined, but you had dinner around the same time every year. Six-ish. Seven-ish. “Sometime around six, I think. What? You plannin’ on makin’ a good impression?” Pinching the phone between the side of your face and shoulder, you pulled one of the goats back from the trough by her back legs.

“Stop it, Frankie!” She bleated in response.  

“Was that a goat I just heard?”  

“No, it was Frankie— she’s worse than a goat. She’s, like, goat-fucking-three thousand— fuck! Hold on.” She placed the phone on a bucket, to stalk over to the problematic goat trying to fight her own sibling. “You’re pushing it. You are pushing it, Francine Miller!” Gripping the antlers that rose from her skull, you forced her to look at you. “This isn’t your food— that’s your food. Over there.”  

Picking her up, wrapping your arms around her stomach, you lifted her toward her own trough. That a few other goats huddled at to feast on their breakfast. “If I see you over there bothering your brothers again, I’m gon’ put you right back in that barn— don’t mess with me.”

You walked back to that bucket, picking up the small silver flip phone placed sloppily in the middle. “Sorry about that… But, yeah, sometime around six.” A tired sigh fell from your lips.  

“That southern drawl of yours… Getting stronger by the day.” She chuckled, in amusement. You heard her shuffling against cloth—perhaps, blankets and pillows.  

“The price of being around my family for too long.” You match her brief chuckle, twisting your toe into the dirt.  

“I’m certainly not complaining.” Abby commented, inhaling deeply. “Well, I’ll be there for six— unless you tell me otherwise…”  

“All right, sounds good, Abby.”  

“All right, bye, babe.”  

Babe.

The pet name made you freeze, but before you could say anything, she hung up the phone. You clenched you phone in your hand, gripping it tight enough for the blood to drain from your knuckles. Babe—since fucking when?  

A snicker caught your attention, causing you to swivel around on your toes. Her shiny, obsidian hair was tucked under a knit beanie. The medium-length blunt ends sticking out from the bottom, hanging over the shoulders of her jacket. A jacket that was sickeningly similar to one of Ellie’s—it most likely was.  

“Who’s this lucky girl… Abby?” She perked a slender eyebrow, brown eyes boring through you. Slightly squinting with taut features.  

You waved your hand before placing them on your hips. “A girl I met in the city. She’s up here with some friends— thought I’d invite her to dinner. She's the one who dropped me off the other night.” You explained, shrugging at your last word. After sleeping with her girlfriend, the least you could do was open with her.   

Cat leaned over the wooden fence, instead of coming inside. Her hands balling together in front of her body to keep her exposed skin warm. “Oh, really? What’s the status between the two of you? Since you’re… Inviting her to Thanksgiving dinner ‘n all?” She questioned, lips pressing together.  

There was something bitter in her speech that rubbed you the wrong way. But, nonetheless, you answered. “It’s complicated…” A laugh falls from your lips—fake and deceiving. “It’s been off and on for about a year— believe it or not.”  

“I believe it.” Cat chortled behind a fist. “Dating in New York is hard. People just don’t take relationships seriously anymore— I totally get it.” Her eyes rolled as she spoke, shiny lips curling at the corners.  

Awkwardly, you nod. Her tone alarming you once more. “Yeah… Well, I need to get back to this— the quicker this is over the better.”  

“Right…”  

“Are you planning on helping the parents cook, or…”  

She crossed her arms, lips frowning, slightly. “Yeah. Later, I’m helping Joel and Tommy with the steak. I’ve never really cooked steak before so… Wish me luck.” Cat chuckled, stepping back from the fence. “I’ll let you get back to work, though…” She began to walk off, after you waved, halfheartedly. Pausing in the well-kept grass, she looked over her shoulder. “Could you point me in the direction of my girlfriend? I’m sure you know where she is.”  

Hm.  

“Uh, yeah, sure— She’s either in the horse barn or the greenhouse… I would check the horse barn first.” You point towards the wooden paneled barn some meters away. My girlfriend. Did that not sound harsh? There was such diction in her proclamation for Ellie. It was an iron bar being burned into your chest, over your heart like a branding.  

She didn’t say much of a thank you, only a head nod and a wave. Leaving you standing in the same patch of mud you were standing in when she arrived. That interaction felt oddly tangy, rather than sweet—like usual. Of course, you had your doubts about Cat, but this time it felt different. So much different.

For another thirty minutes, you monitored Frankie and the other goats. Giving her a bunch of kisses to make up for your irate behavior—after all, she was behaving better; she deserved them!

Finishing your work, you didn’t realize until your stepped into the house—leaving your shoes on the porch—that Ellie didn’t call or text you about anything. She was supposed to meet you when she finished her side of the chores, but she never showed. It was too cold to wait around for her, so you trotted back to the house. And it’s not like you had her number; she had yours.  

In the back of your mind, you worried about the interaction she had with Cat. Why wouldn’t you? As the days went by, you were growing in possessiveness of someone that wasn’t even yours. She used to be, but that wouldn’t hold up in court.  

You noticed Maria working in the kitchen, working on small side dishes. Before you jogged up the stairs, you let her know that you’d be back after a warm shower. Cooking food while smelling like actual animal shit wasn’t a great mix.

Tommy had already put the television on the channel where the game was playing. The direct speech of sports anchors playing as background noise on the first floor--bouncing off the walls.  

When you walked up the stairs, you heard the soft tune of Joel strumming and tuning his new guitar from his bedroom. It soothed your ears—his playing always did. There was a song he used to play for you, and sometimes Ellie, when you were teenagers. Then, after while, she began to play it for you. Sat in the corner of your reading nook, in a t-shirt and plaid boxers (or whatever underwear she was wearing), strumming at the tough strings of her guitar. Looking into your eyes like you were unreal.

Everyone seemed to be doing something on this busy morning. And you were soon to jump right in.  

Steam opened your pores as you cleansed the dirt and grime off your skin. You attempted not to drown within your own thoughts while the showering. Echoes of your parents’ voices bounced around your mind, along with Joel’s. It was overwhelming. You feared they’d never forgive you if they found out what you and Ellie were doing—or had done. Then, there was Cat; a part of you felt bad for her. That she was getting caught in the middle of unfinished business… Clearly, your attempt at clearing your head didn’t work.  

Shutting off the shower, smelling like a happy mixture of vanilla and coconut, you wrapped yourself in a towel to walk to your bedroom. When you entered, you didn’t notice the frame of your estranged lover sitting on your bed—until you pivoted on damp feet. “Shit, Ellie… What the hell are you doing?” You gasp, clenching onto the material of the old beach towel you were using to dry off.  

Her back was facing you, eyes cast toward the paneled window of your reading nook. The auburn strands of her hair were damp, leaving marks on the shoulders and back of her grey sweatshirt.  

“She fucking knows…”  

Your eyebrows stitched together, trying to take in what the woman before you had said. Shutting your door with a sigh, you turn back around slowly. “What do you mean…?” Your voice trembled, wanting clarification even though you already knew what she meant. That hole that you dug was only getting deeper. Or, perhaps, not. It’s already reached max depth.

Ellie peered over her shoulder, the whites of her eyes unnerved. Freckled cheeks flushed to oblivion. “You PM’d me last night on MySpace…”  

“Yeah…?” You slowly approached her, shrugging your shoulders. Although, your heart was racing—beating throughout your entire body. If that was even possible.  

“When I got back to the guesthouse last night, I basically conked out, y/n.” Ellie told, finally shifting her body to see your stunned frame in its entirety. Water droplets dripping down your arms and legs; muscles tightening in anticipation.  

A hand shot over your mouth, eyebrows furrowing in remorse. If she went right to sleep, then someone else had been responding to you—and you don’t believe in ghosts. “Please, tell me you’re fucking with me.”  

She placed her head in her hands. “I wish I was…” Ellie bounced her leg, nervously. “Why the fuck would you mention anything that happened over the internet?” Her tone shifted, scolding you with the same pair of eyes that once caressed your skin with adoration.

“I had no other way to tell you about Joel. I was trying to warn you—“  

“Yeah, what a warning that was.”  

You scoff, crossing your arms. “Okay, hold on… How do you know about this? D— Did she confront you— or what?”  

She sighed. “She came and talked to me while I was grooming Sarah— Also, you forgot to mention that she doesn’t like to be brushed…!” Her round features were pulled taut, glaring at you.  

“I met her, like, once, Ellie. How would I know that she doesn’t like to be brushed?” You retorted, kicking out a leg, narrowing your eyes. “And… She’s a fucking baby. You should’ve expected that.”

“She said if I don’t admit what I did by tonight… She’s gonna fucking do it.”  

You bunched your eyebrows, shaking your head—utterly confused. “She’s gonna fucking do what? Wh— What is this, Ellie— fucking One Tree Hill?!” It was incredulous for Cat to make such a threat. Theatricals were never your choice of handling things. Hence the last time an explosive episode happened on the farm. You shut down and close off—it’s always too much!  

The auburn-haired woman’s feature slightly softened, looking up at you from her seated position.

Noticing the tensing in your body—seeing that face she swore she never wanted to see again. “Uhm, what did you say…?” You questioned, carefully with pinched lips and drifting eyes.  

“I said that I would…”  

Record scratch. Again. How many of those were you going to experience in a single week?

“Ellie—!”  

“To alleviate some of her frustration—!” She tried.

“I don’t give a fuck why you agreed to her stupid threat, Ellie— it’s the fact that you did!” You paced, squeezing the bridge of your nose. Thinking. Hard. Your voice had boomed, forgetting that the walls weren’t thick. “I will not have this random emo chick ruin the relationship I have with my parents… Because she wants to get back at you.”  

She leaned back on her hands, shrugging. “And you… She’s getting back at you, too.”  

“Seriously.” You snapped your head toward her, blinking with blossoming anger.  

“Dead serious.” Ellie held your eyes, courageously. She never liked seeing you angry, but boy, did it set her skin on fire. You were always so concerned with how people perceived you, that you avoided acting within your nature. Even though, in your truest nature, you were the most beautiful thing.  

You pointed a finger at her, strolling toward her. “Is this funny to you?”  

“Is there a smile on my face?” She retorted, looking up at you through her thick, batting lashes.

“You look amused—“  

“I am.” She simply stated, causing you to raise an eyebrow. “Because you’ve never changed, y/n. It’s always appearances with you— for everything.” You rolled your eyes at that, scoffing under your breath. What did she know? “Little-miss-perfect… Always has to do the right thing— not because she wants to, but because she wants others to notice that she does.”

Her words sounded familiar. More put together, but familiar.  

“It’s fucking pathetic, babe—“

“Get hell the out of my room.” The words came from you like a whisper with pinched lips, clenching your fists at your sides. Her and her name-calling.

Ellie stood up, chest nearly touching the towel that wrapped around you. Chest to chest. “Can you think about us for one second?” Her fingers tethered to your bare skin, dancing up your arms. “Cat’s makin’ our karma come quick— embarrassing us in front of our family. And, yeah, we did a fucked-up thing. I can admit and make peace with that because I wanna be with you.” She squeezed your shoulders, examining your tight features. Ellie reached her hand to grace your cheek, but you turned away.  

A sigh fell from her lips, pulling away from your body. “And all you can think about is your parents… What they would think?” Ellie scoffed, running her hand through her damp strands. “You’re an adult—! And you, certainly, made an adult decision to fuck me the other night— so this is your fault as much as it is mine.” She lectured. Ellie Williams was lecturing you. Oh, how the tables turn.

“Fucking stand in it.” The artist grit, pointing her finger to the ground. “That’s you’re fuckin’ problem. Always wanting to be perfect— but you’re not! Not even close.”

Tears began to build in the corner of your eyes, lips quivering at her words. Heart wrenching at her stern tone. “And I fucking love you for it…” Ellie appeared dejected, gliding toward your door. Adhering to the command you gave her: Get out. “But if your parents’ opinion weigh heavier… Fine.”  

A beat meandered through the room, while Ellie’s hand hovered over the handle.

“I realized… After Cat found me in the barn that…” She chewed on her lip. “I’m not ashamed of what we did— which is why I don’t mind telling the truth. It may be a threat for her but… it’s a release for me.”

A sob shockingly came from your throat, plopping onto your reading nook. The strength of your neck unable to hold up your head—it dropped into your hands to cover your face. “Please,” Your breath hitched, peeking through your fingers. “Ellie, please, don’t say anything. Don’t ruin tonight over something…Something fickle.”  

Fickle?

She deepened her eyebrows in offense before pulling open the door. “I’m telling them whether you like it or not. Shape up or ship the fuck out.” Ellie pushed through the door, making sure to shut it light enough not to cause a stir, but heavy enough to unsettle you further.  

To Ellie’s core, she was a pusher; a person who liked to push others—for better or for worse. Just depended on the day, and the person. Now, in her past, she’s made the mistake of pushing you into a worser version of yourself. And she almost did it again, but she revised her actions efficiently. She corrected it. Switched it around like a puzzle-piece placed in the wrong spot.  

You needed to learn how to stand in your decision—good or bad—and not cowering within them. There’s no point in begging for a person’s forgiveness once you’ve done something wrong. Accountability and apologies are all a person has. And your parents—pssh; you shouldn’t be worrying about that so much.  

Tommy and Maria loved you more than life itself, and Ellie understood why because she did, too.  

There was nothing you could do to scarlet letter your persona. Absolutely nothing.  

Even after titling the love you and Ellie embraced fickle; she could never turn her face from you— not for long anyway.  

Dragging her feet down the hall, old converse sliding against the wood, eyes watering with warm tears in the corner of her eyes; a door creaked open. An aged pair of brown eyes, pushing though the slot. “Everything all right, kiddo…?”

Slowly, she turned her head to look at him. Olive eyes attempting to blink back tears at the sound of his softened, gravelly voice. Sniffling, her legs carried her toward him, wrapping her arms around his soft abdomen, tucking her head into his chest.  

Nothing came from her but soft, stressed cries. Fingers clenching onto the fabric of his flannel behind his back.

As much as this situation was a lot for you, it was a lot for her as well—just in a different way, for a different reason.

In your room, you were still on that reading nook in your towel. Your body was was dry, so the old cloth scratched and tickled your skin. It was deserving for you to be uncomfortable. Ellie was right; you were a little pathetic—for lack of better word.  

You spent so much time wanting to fix yourself. Be the best version of yourself. And that wasn’t Tommy or Maria’s fault, it was your own. When you were first adopted, sent to a new school, you had a full out meltdown. Some kid had been picking on you for being quiet, and you escalated the situation to a place that it didn’t need to go. As in: using your fists to defend yourself. From then, you were thrown into therapy and had to relearn that fighting wasn’t the answer. Maria aided that by drilling into your head that violence was something that could get you into trouble.  

So, how did the way people perceived you become such a focus? Well, Maria’s scoldings of your behavior translated in your head—along with trauma of past foster homes and neglectful parents—that what people saw of you mattered more than your own conclusions. They thought, therefore you were.  

You failed to fact-check. You failed to have a personal understanding of your own behavior. It was rare for you to make peace with your own actions—good or bad. You were always stuck on what a person would think of you; especially, your parent’s. Perhaps, there was still a part of you that felt you needed to prove that you worth caring for. Worth supporting. 

That pressure continues and continues and continues to shove your head underwater no matter how many times your flail and beg for air.  

It was obnoxious. It is obnoxious. You’re obnoxious.  

Love isn’t conditional. It’s a feeling that tethers people to one another despite anything. Despite flaws and self-guilts—it perseveres. That concept shouldn’t be difficult to grasp because, after all Ellie had said on that one unfaithful afternoon, you still loved her. You loved her at seventeen, and you love her at twenty-five. Nothing has changed. Nothing will change.  

And the same applied for your parents to you.  

It was fucking physics and you were a prodigal humanities student who looked at STEM in contempt.

Solemnly, you dressed into a pair of comfy clothes. Attempting to replace the frown that stuck to your lips, although your body was already weakened from your emotions. Surprisingly, a cigarette couldn’t cure your overthinking mind—not this time. There was no point in pulling from one.  

After squeezing eye drops into your eyes to eliminate the irritated veins in your sclera’s, you stomped down the wooden stairs. When your mother noticed you, she smiled. Her sparkling white teeth glimmering in your eyes—warm and kind. “Ellie and Joel are gonna be baking the pie at the guesthouse… So, the kitchen is ours.” Maria chuckled to herself, kneading the dough for her legendary biscuits.  

“I know how much you hate overcrowded kitchens…” You respond, grabbing the apron with your nickname stitched on the front—Bug. She did a double take, looking from the dough in her hands. Noticing that unfortunate look on your face, and that blandness in your tone.  

Maria sighed, setting the dough aside, leaning her flour covered hands against the counter. “Not you, too… What the hell is in the air today?” She shook her head, averting her eyes to you with intensity. “What’s goin’ on with you— Ellie had just come down here with that same look on her face.”  

“What look?”  

“That look.”  

You pressed your lips into a line, looking around in thought. It was easier to lie and say something unrelated but that was fruitless idea. So, you said nothing, walking over to the cornbread she left out to begin working on the stuffing.  

Raising an eyebrow, she followed you with her icy irises. She then called you your full name, which sent chills down you spine.

You sucked your teeth, meeting her stern eyes. “Ellie and I had sex…” You mutter, peering down to your shaking hands.  

“What…?”  

It was difficult to say aloud to your mother, but that the rest came behind swiftly. “And Cat found out because I had a run-in with Joel— he heard, and I wanted to let Ellie know… So, I private messaged her on MySpace, but turns out, she wasn’t the one responding to me; Cat was.” You puffed air from your lips. “This morning, she came by to ask where Ellie was, so I told her she was in the horse barn. Come to find out, she confronted her, threatening to air all of our shit out to you and dad and Joel as a consequence.”

“Tommy, get in here.” She asserted to her husband focused on the television, keeping her wide eyes on you.

Another sigh came from you, watching as your father navigated into the kitchen. “After my shower, Ellie was in my room and that’s when she told me. We got into it a little bit… Uhm, because she told me that she was gonna tell y’all that we slept together and that pissed me off— because why would she do that?” You scoff, not noticing the glances your father was making to your mother as you unloaded this heavily detailed bundle of information. “How could she be so quick to admit that we had sex to our family that has known us since we were children? That we committed fucking adultery while her girlfriend was only, like, ten meters away—“  

“Honey,” Tommy tried, but you held up a finger.  

“Let me finish.” Your eyes welled with tears, looking at your fathers aging features. “I couldn’t understand how she was so okay with it, but, now, I do. I think I do…” You glance between the two people hovering around you. “The only reason why I came up with the idea— yeah, I’m the one who came up with it… To hookup. Sue me— was because I wanted to see if what was happening between us was real. And it fucking was!”  

“I know what we did was wrong. I knew it was wrong when I decided to go through with it… I begged Ellie not to say anything— which is ironic considering I’m the one talkin’.” You chuckled, wiping a warm tear that slipped from your eyes. “I was afraid of what you guys would think of me. That you wouldn’t love me anymore because of what I did— because you didn’t raise a liar…” Pausing, you released a shaky breath. “Verbatim: she told me to shape up… Or ship the fuck out. I chose the latter because… You didn’t raise a coward either.”  

They blinked at you.  

“I love Ellie. I really do, and yeah, we should’ve gone about this differently— but we didn’t. And I’m sorry.” Curtly, you nodded your head, adjusting your shoulder to stand up straighter. “I’m so grateful that you guys are my parents— you chose to be here and support me. The least I can do is be honest with you. Even if that results in your disappointment.”  

The tears had dried up in your eyes sometime amid your ramble of humility. Confidence growing with every word that you spoke. Ellie’s words rang through your skull about your consistent jig of morality. Fuckup’s don’t make you nor should they break you.  

Shit happens!

Their quietness made you tremble out of that shell of confidence you manifested, making you breathe a little heavier and feel a little more uncomfortable within your skin. You watched as they looked at each other. Maria sporting a mixture of concern and disappointment on her features—more disappointment than concern. And, Tommy, the complete opposite.  

“You know, what? I’ll let you two… Sit on this.” You walk past them, toward the fridge. In the door, there was both glass bottles and cans of beer—Miller Lite and Heineken. You grabbed the green glass bottle by the neck, “I’m gonna have a beer…” Walking toward the back door with horse barn on your mind.  

It was like a weight lifted off your shoulders after you confessed. Being honest with your thoughts about the whole situation made you feel lighter—feather allowing the wind to guide her, type of light. It was freeing to stand in her truth.

The cool breeze of autumn bit at your exposed arms, and the sliver of skin between the hem of your top and the hip line of your sweats. But because you were riding on the high of your confession, you didn’t feel the chill. You never were much of a beer person—it never made sense for you to drink. Yeast was never your thing, but after your confession, you had a craving for it. The beer, not so much the yeast. You overcame something big—you cried yourself into a new you. A better you.

And not that surface-better person you were trying or pretending to be.  

When you arrived at the barn, you didn’t forget to pet the grazing horses near you before entering. Remnants of Ellie’s work lingered around, but there was no sight of her. Perhaps, it was for the best. Reaching for one of the bridles hanging on an iron hook, you used the belt to pluck off the tin cap that topped the bottle.  

Settling in scattered hay, you plopped onto the ground, taking a large sip. Gritting your teeth at the flavor—still, wasn’t much of a fan. Although, she lingered close to her mother, Sarah began to drift toward you. Curiosity ruling her developing brain. You reached out to her, scratching the short tufts of her blonde hair.  

She leaned into your hand, huffing air from her nostrils. It made you smile, her comfortability with you after knowing her for such a short time. “Oh, Sarah…” You sighed, wistfully.  

From behind her, in the distance, you see your mother’s figure approaching you. You take in a nervous breath, preparing for her, potentially, harsh words.  

Maria’s boots crunched along the sprawled hay, taking her time to sit beside you. Leaning her against the same wooden wall you did. She ran her hand through her short blonde hair, sighing as her shorter pieces of her hair fell right back into place. “If…” She began, thoughtfully. “I’ve ever given you a reason to think that I— we could ever stop loving you, y/n; that was my mistake. I wanna start there. Out of everything that you said in there… That’s what disappointed me most.”  

Your eyes flicker to hers, briefly. Sarah had retreated back towards her mother. “Yeah, I must admit… I don’t wanna see my daughter, my kid, doing something worth regretting— no parent wants to see that.” She shook her head, glancing back at the horses. “And, yes, I am disappointed that you did something of this nature… But I know your heart, honey.” Maria reached her hand to your bent knee, caressing with her thumb.  

The heat in your cheeks and eyes increased with emotion. “I’ll never forget that look on your face when we surprised you with those papers.” She smiled at the memory, and you leaned into her as if it were muscle memory. “You were… Relieved. And, from that day forward, Tommy and I promised to do right by you. To love you how you deserved to be loved— to prove that you deserved to be loved despite what the world had already managed to convince you.”  

You wrapped your hand around the one on your knee while tears dripped from the corners of your eyes. “You think something like this would change my mind?” She looked down at you leaning her shoulder.  

“Yeah… I guess…” You insecurely blinked at her. Feeling like the very thirteen-year-old she was referencing.  

The blonde woman shook her head, placing a hand on your cooling cheek. “Well, that’s the farthest from the truth, Bug.” Her lips plotted against your forehead, comfortingly. “Your father and I will love you until we’re cold in the ground—“  

“Mom, don’t say that.” You whined, sniffling.  

“Probably, beyond that—“  

“Mom!”  

She snickered, peeling the beer from your fingers, and taking a sip for herself. “I don’t know how they tolerate this stuff.” Maria grimaced, shaking her head, setting it aside. “So… What’s the course of action now that everybody knows this big secret?”  

You pull from her, leaning your head against the wall. “I don’t know…” You sighed, shutting your eyes. “Ellie is pissed at me—“  

“For…?” She perked a slender eyebrow.  

“Because… I called our situation fickle to get her to not say anything, but clearly, that didn’t work.” You shook your head. “I guess, I’m the impulsive one now.”  

Maria hummed. “Looks like you have a lot to clear up.”  

You inhaled, peering at her. “Looks like it.” With another breathy sigh, you shook your head.

“Fuck, and Cat.” You slapped your hand against your forehead.

“Ah. You know, she has every right to be upset?”  

“Of course, I do. But, to be fair…”  

“Nope—“  

“Ellie came up here to get away from her— that’s what she told me!”  

Your mother scolded you, calling you by your full name—because that was her super power. But, you ignored her, sitting up straight to prove your point. “She was living in the biggest, most creative city in the world and felt crowded? How does that make sense?”  

She scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Maybe… Maybe this is what they needed.” You shrugged.  

Maria stood to her feet, offering you a hand. “Let’s not get caught up in the little details— you have some apologizing to do.”  

“Ugh! I know, I know…” You took her hand, hopping to your feet. She bent down, picking up the beer bottle by the throat.

“But before that, you need to cover up those arms, and get to work in that kitchen— because, we have guests.” As your mother ushered you back into the house, you dragged your slippers against the ground, finding your way back inside the house with a newfound comfort.

Almost an hour earlier, the guesthouse was bluntly silent. Nothing but the slight huffing of Joel kneading dough and the crunching of breadcrumbs from Ellie. There wasn’t much conversation; only the actions of their priorities fr dinner. Cat had locked herself in the bedroom, probably, plotting her next attack.

Joel made a point to keep his eyes on Ellie—and Cat—to make sure nothing crazy happened. Cheating situations made people a little tense at times.  

“So… Ellie, what song are you planning on playin’ tonight?” He tried, beginning to roll out the dough; flat to place in the round tin pan.  

She sighed, glancing at him with a dismissive glare. “I’m not playin’ tonight…”  

“Come on, it’s tradition—“  

“Fuck, tradition! I’m not doing it. Can we move on?”  

He huffed, placing the wooden roller on the floured counter. “I think you need to cut her some slack, kiddo. She didn’t mean to—“  

“I don’t care what she meant—“  

“Can you let me finish?” He raised an eyebrow, pointing an index finger that was caked with white flour. Ellie bunched her lips together, rolling her eyes. “Now, Ellie, I know you’re upset with y/n, with how the situation panned out— I get it. But don’t let your frustration cloud your judgement.” He told. “I spoke to her long before you did. I don’t believe for a second that she truly thinks that your relationship is fickle.”  

He inhaled, scratching the back of his neck. “Sometimes we say things that we don’t mean— I’m sure you know about that.”  

She ran her tongue over her lips, tapping her foot against the floor. Thinking back to a few years ago when she exploded on Joel and you. Ellie was good for that—saying things she didn’t mean. “I mean, I’ve said a few things to Tommy in my day.”  

“Joel…” She shook her head. “I don’t even know if it’s that alone— I…” Ellie struggled to verbalize, gesticulating with her hands and fingers as words attempted to materialize behind her teeth. “She’s always choosing her parents over me— over everything and everyone. Really, it’s doing her a disservice—“  

The artist began to rant like her life depended on it. Of course, in a low enough tone where her girlfriend in the other room couldn’t hear. Joel just watched a listened, as her features contorted with annoyance. But, within her big, earthy eyes, Ellie told on herself. Her claims didn’t come from hatred, or even contempt—it came from her adoration of you.  

In the corner of the room, relied the piece she’s been working on since the day of her arrival, or rather, the night of. It was no longer covered with a white, paint-stained sheet. Her work had been exposed to the light due to a quick argument between her and Cat before Joel came to save the day. It was a colored-in image of you in front of that old shed. A joint rested between your index and middle finger with a look of relaxation was on your smoothly stroked features. Ellie made sure to depict you in your most comfortable state.  

If only he could see her sketch book.  

“Ellie, you have to break up with her.”  

She paused, mid-sentence. “What?”  

“Matter of fact, you need to break up with Cat— now.”

Uncomfortably, she shifted on her bare feet. “But… The pie…”  

He chortled, averting his eyes to the art piece at the corner of the room. “Priorities, Ellie. Priorities.” Joel leaned his hip against the marble counter. “Go in there, break up with her— as kindly as you can. Then, offer to drive her to the train station. If she declines, insist. If you go now, you should make it back before dinner. You know Maria will have a cow if you’re late.”

Briefly, she thought to herself. Ellie was never the type to be afraid of confrontation—she may have hesitated a few times… But she was never afraid. She never expected her actions to be thrown into her face so quickly, though. The memory of Cat approaching Ellie in that barn sent chills down her spine, because she had an inkling that something was wrong the minute she had appeared. Her dark brown eyes were squinty and boring through her as she approached. At first, Ellie didn’t notice Cat’s slender frame walking up to her—as she were hyper-focused on tending to the small, blonde-haired foal.

They have been together for nearly a year, so of course, the freckled artist knew when she was truly upset. Cat was a woman of subtly, despite her tattoos and silver piercings. Her anger pressed through with an even tone, and a stiff posture; rather than, expression through loud voices and firm fist curls. They are polar opposites in that way. That is what originally attracted Ellie to her—but in that moment, she shivered.

It was like whiplash, comparing how she woke up to how she appeared in front of Ellie in that moment. Making her wonder, if that happy act was all lie? It most certainly was.

Cat somehow surpassed a level of straightforwardness that Ellie was comfortable with, telling her exactly how it was: Why she made breakfast for her this morning, the MySpace conversation (why she pretended to be her), her certainty of her infidelity, and the official threat that set everything off the rails. Easily, her intention was to embarrass Ellie and you. She sensed the timidness that you hid behind and wanted to use it against you. She assumed, based off the history between you and Ellie, that the only way for Ellie to be affected is to make an example of you. However, she imagined that it would be more difficult for her girlfriend to confess her actions first.

You weren’t particularly obvious with what happened between the two of you, but she would have to be stupid to not assume that it was a sexual thing. But when Cat approached Ellie with the statement: You told me you were going on a run. She didn’t expect to be met with immediate truth. Her olive eyes had grown wide for only a second, before words began to just flood from her like an open dam. Ellie couldn’t stop herself.

Perhaps, it was the complaints of you echoing in her head. Your fervent concerns about going back to Cat—it made her feel guilty; so, she confessed as if she were bribed to tell the truth and was content with the consequences. All the while, brushing the soft, blunt hairs of Sarah.

Ellie assumed that was why Cat made a threat to support her dominance. That made her hesitate a bit—admitting to her family that her and an old flame, that ended horribly in their teenagerhood, had secret sex in the middle of the night? Despite having a girlfriend—who could ever do such a thing?

Apparently, Ellie.

Straightening her shoulders, she didn’t back down, though. She took full accountability for her behavior, claiming that she would be the one to tell them what she did—although, she did find that to be dramatic. It wasn’t until Ellie was checking off the chores list in the garden, when she realized her fate had a drastic connection to you.

You weren’t the type to stand tall in defeat or mistake. When the things you did wrong were brought to you, you quivered and coward away because it made you feel more than you preferred. Faulty. It made you want to sequester—the total opposite of Ellie.

She could never forget how you hid away after the fight on her seventeenth birthday. You didn’t go to school for a week. Ellie offered to bring you schoolwork, like the waving of a white flag, but you declined—or, rather, your parents declined. One of your academic friends made visits to the farm every day to give you the missing work. For a moment, after not hearing from you, Ellie thought you moved abroad or something. You were the closest thing to a true hermit.

That worried her because this is the last thing you’d ever want to admit, and it was Ellie’s fault. She may not have felt a lick of regret for loving on you like she used to, but she felt bad for putting you in a situation you couldn’t seamlessly get out of. It was a nightmare to see you flail, but the only way out is through. Ellie learned that a long time ago. Maybe, it was your turn to reassess that motto.

The only way out is through.

So, Ellie made her way to the bedroom they shared, knocking before she entered.

Cat had her back propped up against the wooden headboard; a pair of headphones covering her pierced ears as she typed on her own computer. Her bags were packed and ready in the corner of the room—that’s what she spent her time doing this morning… Packing her bags. When she wasn’t issuing theatrical threats. That’s already one concern out the window. She was ready to ship out. When she noticed Ellie, her soft features fell.

“You’re already packed…” She acknowledged, rocking on her bare feet. Cat removed her headphones with a sigh. “Let me take you to the train station—”

“Before you tell your family that you boldly cheated on your girlfriend? I don’t think so.” She dismissed, tilting her head to the side. “If this is your way of getting out of—”

Ellie groaned, slapping her hands against her thighs. “I’m not trying to get out of anything, Cat. I just don’t want you paying a fucking grand to get back into the city.”

“What do you care?” Cat challenged, setting her laptop aside. “Hm? You told me that I had nothing to worry about. That’s what you said… Turns out that was a stupid fucking lie.” She ground out, pressing her lips into a disappointed line. A cruel laugh came from her, while she shook her head in disbelief. “And now, you’re saying you care about how much I’m spending to get back home? Are you fucking with me?”

“I’m not. It’s the least I could do—”

“No… The least you could’ve done was not fuck y/n—that’s the least you could’ve done.” The scorned woman argued, meeting her eyes with intensity. “I’m not going anywhere until I see the looks on Mr. and Mrs. Miller’s faces when they find out what the two of you did— I have a feeling it’ll be memorable.”

The freckled artist found her attitude to be draining, even if it was sensical for her side of things. Her fingers rubbed between her eyebrows. A raspy sigh fleeing from her throat. “Look, I get you’re upset, Cat. But dontcha’ think you’re doing, I don’t know, too much?”

“You think this is too much?”

“Uh, yeah, I do. I said I’d tell ‘em what happened— that should be enough for you.”

Scoffing, she threw her legs over the mattress. “You expect me to believe the woman who cheated on me? How didn’t I know you were this idiotic before?” Cat scoffed, dryly.

She deepened her eyebrows at the insult, gritting her teeth. “You know, what? I’ve been really struggling to keep my mouth shut… But, clearly, there’s no point.” Ellie huffed, blinking her eyes. Perhaps, it was time for her to know the truth on why Ellie wanted to go home for a while. Her stiff words got Cat’s attention, causing her to narrow her dark eyes. “That whole thing about me having a hard time in the city with my art— yeah, that was because of you, not because of fucking Brooklyn.” The woman admitted, releasing the tension in her shoulders. “Truth is, your endless support did nothing but drag out my lack of inspiration—you made it worse! What I needed was to get out of that goddamn apartment, not get out of the city.” She continued, pacing around the room. “From the moment I saw her… Inspiration fucking flooded my psyche— all I could see was her. Her face. Her voice. Her body. She did more for me in second than you ever did for me in the year we’ve been together.”

She ran a hand through her hair, scoffing. A boyish smirk spreading onto her plush lips. “Who’s the fuckin’ idiot now?” Ellie muttered, flickering her earthy eyes toward her shocked expression.

A beat plotted in the environment, feasting on the spreading tension in the room.

That was mean; she matched her cruelty and then some. Ellie shouldn’t have, but she was only human. A human who just made her girlfriend—sorry, ex-girlfriend—cry. Her thin eyebrows pushed into a harsh furrow, tears streaming shown her flushed, hot cheeks. Her fingers danced in front of lips, trying to keep her sorrowful whines from being heard. It wasn’t working. Cat cried like a hurt dog, stuffing her face in her hands at Ellie’s restriction of consolation.

With crossed arms, Ellie looked down at from across the room. Family was one of the most important things to her. Despite her youthful, abrasive attitude, Joel decided to contractually tie himself to her—her adoption. But, even before then, she’s been a divine part of the Miller family. They meant a whole lot to her, you, more so. The fact that she was so willing to draw a wedge between the lot of you… Frankly, it disgusted her. It was repulsive.

“You have every right to be upset. I can’t take that from you.” She let up, lifting her eyebrows. “If anything… What I do regret is pulling you along this far out of convenience. To be honest—”

“Haven’t you been honest enough? Fuck, Ellie.” Cat blurted, peeking over her shoulder.

Her feelings might have been hurt; a simmering flame awaiting the impulsive pressure of Ellie’s old converse. The auburn-haired woman sighed, taking a seat on the bed. Away from Cat, not only to convey her sincerity in her processing words, but to respect Cat’s wired emotions. “I’ve kept enough from you, kitty Cat. My honesty is my apology…” Ellie casted her down-to-earth irises to the side of Cat’s face. When she turned to meet Ellie’s eyes, her smudged eyeliner and mascara became a spectacle. “And my good-bye…”

Cat scoffed in pure offense. “You do not get to break-up with me when you’re the one who fucked up.”

“Well, if you wanna be the one to call it… Then, feel free.”

“No!” She grit her teeth, more tears dripping from the corners of her eyes. “I don’t want to break up with you…” Her lips quivered.

Ellie chortled, leaning her palm into the mattress. “Uhm, one of us is gonna have to do the breaking, Cat.”

They apparently have walked themselves into an impasse. To make a decision, or to not make a decision—that was the question. The response, the answer, was far simpler than Cat was making it, though.

Sighing, the freckled artist looked to the side. Ellie could use this to her advantage—getting her on that train back to the city. “You don’t have to right now…” She began to offer. “How about you mull it over on the way to the train station? I still don’t mind driving you there.” Her fingers fiddled with themselves, hoping she’d finally accept her invitation to leave.

She looked at her frowning, blinking away her tears. “Fine…” Cat stood to her feet, wiping her makeup-stained cheeks with the backs of her hand. “Why don’t you be a doll and bring my bags to the truck. It’s the least you could do.” Before Ellie could respond, she walked into bathroom and locked herself behind the door.

Releasing a long breath of relief, Ellie got up from the bed. As silently as possible, she pumped her fists into the air. Cat was leaving with only a little bit of resistance. That whole dramatic scene she was hoping for wasn’t happening—thank God!

Ellie stuffed her feet into her sneakers, before grabbing her rolling luggage and bag, hoisting the large purse over her shoulder. She left the bedroom, eyeing Joel on her way out. He was covered in flour and sugar, like the chef that he aspired to be. She gave him a thumbs up on the way out the door, snickering to herself.

Joel clapped his hands, forgetting about the flour stuck to his hands. It puffed into the air and down his throat, causing him to obnoxiously cough—away from the food developing in front of him. “Goddamn,”

Ellie peeked her head inside, pushing the luggage to the side on the small wooden porch. “Please, survive until I get back. Wouldn’t want another tragedy on Thanksgiving.”

“Oh, shut it, Ellie.”

She snickered again; her mood instantly heightened. However, as she maneuvered off the porch, her eyes caught sight of you and your mother. Maria’s arms were around you, guiding you toward the house. You didn’t have a jacket on and sported a pair of slippers—you weren’t dressed for the brisk afternoon air, dragging your feet against the ground. Ellie had stopped in her tracks. Shoes crunching on bumpy gravel. She couldn’t help but wonder what led you out the house. Was it her? Did she unnerve you so bad that you ran away from the warmth of the house?

Also, did you mean what you said when you used fickle as a description of your relationship with Ellie? Boy, did she have so many questions. This ball was filled with kinetic energy, rolling as it should have. She was just going to have to keep the momentum of its roll. For how long? The inspired artist didn’t know—but what she did know, was that she had a woman to make hers again.

This time, in a sustainable way, instead of a chaotic one.

taglist: @autisticintr0vert , @liasxeatt , @hopingforgoodblogs , @lia-winther , @macaroni676 , @tobiotruther , @anewkindofloove , @fatbootymuncher , @maiaska , @culuvr , @0phantom0 , @onlinelesbo , @bbnbhm , @lovelaymedown , @lamorenita , @scatapple , @elliewilliamsblunt , @goddessofchaosss , @mikellie , @emmanetalias , @sevyscoven , @lluvbk

[alexrosa13]

Professor's Princess

professor!Rafayel x female!student!reader

Genre: smut with lots of plot (it's mostly plot)

Warnings: 19,7k words, the usual minor writing smut! (month away before 18 alr, I could gatekeep it for the next month, but a promise is a promise @pozuki) block or scroll if uncomfortable!, Rafayel and reader having the same past as him and mc, however with a different present plot so reader is not the mc, reader studies art and is an artist!, reader's clothes described (skirts, dresses, revealing clothes and high shoes, no body features specified tho other than reader having hair), nude paintings, this work contains lots of deep feelings and love, so if you're not into sweet stuff this is not for you, fingering, sex in a public space (classroom//office in the university), male & female masturbation, mutual masturbation, penis in vagina sex, crempie (reader is said to be on birth control), nicknames (cutie, baby, princess←overused I'm not sorry), stalker Rafayel if you squint..., supportive friends (nps's names: Soraya, Angela)

Note: I tried my best to add accurate information about art here, together with coming out with what Rafayel's personal opinions would be like, please do correct me if anything you see here is a false claim!

for masterlist and request info head to the navigation →

When Rafayel became your professor you didn't bat an eye, focused on your goals, not taking a notice of the hottie everyone talked about. What changed and pushed you to catch feelings? Do you believe in fate? Because something clearly pushes you his way...

‘How do you even get yourself into a situation like this?’

You were sitting on a lecture about modern art, the topic itself very much interesting, especially when the person talking about it was Rafayel himself, but most of the people there didn't come to learn about art.

He could have said something like sky is green or purple color doesn't exist and they would all nod and agree with him, simply because of the way he carries himself, unusual and unparalleled artist with a specific worldview, not afraid to voice controversial opinions.

But he was so much more than that.

Everyone admired him for his work and character, the second of which seemed weird since if anyone else would act the same way he did they would be considered rude and tactless, but Rafayel? He could be as mean as he'd want to, and people would continue singing him praises, what an unfair standard that comes with being famous. Other people simply excused his behavior because of his looks, which you had to admit, were really, really good.

At first you didn't like him, didn't even respect him to be honest, thinking of him as another rich man with too much influence in his hands, but with time? You started noticing the little things.

The way he spoke about art as something magical itself, having deeper respect for a piece of paper than an actual human being, and honestly? In some weird way you approved that thinking logic.

Most people in this specific class weren't artists, or even just people interested in it, they simply chose to attend that class because someone popular (despite not even being active in the media) works as a professor, limiting the amount of free places in the lecture for people actually interested in what he's talking about.

You still had no idea how you got a place, since you signed up for it really late and didn't expect to actually make it, but to your surprise you got yourself a spot.

Totally not because the professor himself pulled some strings...

Rafayel wasn't actually half as bad as you first thought, he didn't indulge in people exciting over his existence, didn't use his popularity as a sign that he deserves respect, no. He was much more simple than that, which also made him more complicated since he was so different from the rest.

You didn't really engage in making friends at the university, focusing on your art and people whom you already knew for longer, people who were actually interested in what you do, allowing you a sneak peeks at the process of their own creative work.

And they were enough for you. You liked being alone, didn't care much about people's opinions, preferring silence or music over conversations that you couldn't end out of politeness when they got boring.

Humans were boring.

That's what you use to justify your lack of social interactions for the most part. A couple of people who you knew just get you and actually like you were enough, especially since the conversations at the university were always the same, talks about relationships, problems of our world, parties and stuff like that. Now the quiet groups at the university did in fact sound fun sometimes, talking about topics that you wouldn't catch in the casual conversation when meeting a stranger, weirdly specific and interesting.

And last days? Everyone talks about Rafayel.

Girls talking about how much they would like a private lesson with a professor like this in an obvious context, even some guys engaging on it sometimes.

Just Rafayel, Rafayel and Rafayel, whenever you go.

You get it, he's hot, young and simply so, so attractive simply by just existing.

But did they really have no other problems in life than getting laid?

Now at the start of his lectures you kind of despised him, thinking of his as an annoying, selfish prick, who got too much fame for no reason.

But with time and each lesson you gained more and more respect for him, the way he talked mesmerizing you, bringing out passion for art from the depths of each and everyone who'd listen, the way the world around him seemed to stop every time he picked a paintbrush, the way he didn't care about other's opinions, strict but also really chill, a perfect professor.

And the way he looked at you...

It started innocently, you noticed how his gaze seemed to wander to you whenever you entered his classroom, stopping whatever he was doing for a second too long to simply look at you and take you in, something you noticed he didn't do with anyone else.

At first you thought that it was just your imagination, like you were a 10 year old in a water pool trying to gain the attention of an older lifeguard, now you looked out for the attention of your professor. He wasn't that much older than you though, maybe two or three years from what you know.

And despite telling yourself that his glances didn't mean anything, your friend decided to pursue you into testing the theory that he actually likes you.

So one day you wore something that would definitely catch his attention if he decided to pay any to you.

Nothing too risky, just something that you wouldn't usually wear to a boring, hours long lectures, a skirt and a top with a little deeper neckline than you usually wore.

And just when you walked into his classroom, prepared for your friend's plan to fail, he glanced at you like he always did. You tried to act all natural about it, so slowly you walked to your seat, noticing in the corner of your eye that his eyes followed you for much longer than ever before.

Sitting up you decided to sneak a glance at him again; and that's when you caught it.

His eyes studying your figure, his expression not betraying his thoughts, he seemed just as if looking at something that brought him instant inspiration.

Something worth his attention.

His eyes went up to your face, noticing the way you watched him.

Instead of looking away embarrassed he continued to stare, acting as if it didn't mean anything, but you knew the truth. He never graced any other student with his beautiful eyes straying to them for so long.

You smiled slyly, but subtly, resting your chin on your hand, watching the way he couldn't seem to look away.

Noticing your expression he only smirked, finally moving his eyes to the papers before him.

You had him in your grasp, now the only question is how to approach someone like him about it?

Coming back to a recent time: the lecture slowly came to an end, students began to wrap up their stuff to go about their day, when someone's loud voice disturbed the sounds of chairs being moved.

“Professor Rafayel, since the next lesson is about nude painting will you model for us?” One of the very not funny popular girls at the academy asked while giggling with her girlfriends.

Rafayel didn't even turn around from the canvas, standing right before the huge board in the center of the classroom, studying the works his students submitted for the next academy exhibition.

Uncomfortable silence fell onto the hall, only interrupted by giggles of the people who found disrespecting professors funny.

“You're saying that as if you were able to create a full body sketch while portraying the correct human anatomy.” He stated coldly, as usual. Giggles instantly died down when he finally turned around, walking towards his desk casually, as if he didn't just embarrass a student. “I remember how your sketch of a couple sitting and holding hands turned out. Their limbs stretched out way too long to be considered human, women's breasts bigger than her own head while her body remained tiny and slim, don't even get me started on the guy's abs.” He lifted his head up, his cold gaze instantly making the girl look down in shame. “Now, I don't mean that people aren't allowed to be beginners, make mistakes, or are obligated to perfection. No. What I mean is that only people who come here to paint and improve themselves will attend the nude painting lecture.”

Whispers began circling around you, you couldn't help but smirk, instantly trying to hide it.

So he did notice how most of his students had nothing to do with art...

“Same goes to each and every next lesson that will acquire drawing skills on at least decent level. You're in this class for what, two months now? How come you're still unable to create a sketch that at least resembles a human.” He deadpanned, some of the students began to feel called out, just like the girl herself. “I was being nice, turning a blind eye to your incompetence, but really, how can you take a course that is too advanced for you? And not even try to gain any knowledge from it nonetheless.” He said while grabbing a stack of papers and making his way to the classroom door, stopping in the middle of his way. “I'll say this once and let it sink in. The next lecture won't be for anyone without the ability to hold a paintbrush properly.”

And with that he walked out.

A moment of silence met the hall walls again, before people began laughing. The girl and her minions gathered their things with a pout, talking about them never coming back here and what a dick that professor was.

You looked behind you, instantly making eye contact with a girl who just like you attended these classes from passion, she sent you a wink before continuing to pack her things and laughing under her nose.

Oh yes, Rafayel is not as shallow as you took him for.

You had strange dreams, more often than not you found yourself in the ocean depths, not drowning but simply being there, feeling like you and the cold water were one, before suddenly waking up.

Ever since you could remember you felt connected to the ocean, your inspiration skyrocketing every time you gazed into its surface, hearing the waves hit the shore.

Living only about 15 minutes away from it you could easily get there anytime you felt like it, often finding yourself sitting at a distance from the shore with a sketchbook, scribbling something even if you didn't know what final effect you were going for.

It's always been like this, your art often centering around the deep waters, sometimes you drew a human swimming while looking up towards the light above them, illuminating their face, sometimes it was mermaids, mostly male (for no reason at all) wrapped in jewelry all over them. Sometimes simply the view below the surface, colorful, lively, sometimes sad and depressive, all depending on your mood.

But lately... Whatever you try to draw, paint, create, resembles one specific person...

Rafayel.

Your art professor.

Why? You didn't even know. Every time you picked a paintbrush and just went with the flow, planning to simply create a man, any man, the face you painted looked like him, his hair, his silhouette, just him.

You were so tired of it. Feeling like a teen having their first celebrity crush, knowing fully well they will never happen.

But you still managed to keep your hopes up.

However if anyone asked? You didn't care about him, at all, that's it, that's the story, you don't care.

Because you didn't want to be like all those brain-less girls attending his class just to admire him. You had a goal, you wanted to improve, to learn, to build your future starting by finishing this university, and no hot professor will be able to pull you away from something you worked all your life for.

But also with each and every word spoken by him he seemed more and more mesmerizing, your gaze wandering around his features, unconsciously implanting his image into your brain.

And despite you trying not to pay attention to it you could feel his eyes on you more often than not.

Tomorrow's another lecture. Nude paintings. You can do it, more than familiar with painting human anatomy. But also it's supposed to have less people than ever before attending it...

Honestly, if he already managed to build a house in your mind with the way he had you thinking about him everyday, why won't you do the same to him?

After all, two can play this game, right? Let's push his limits a little bit, live a little, you won't risk your place in the academy since you're not planning to do something scandalous, right? They can't kick you out for no evidence that you tried to seduce your professor, right?

You did just what you said you would. The very next day you woke up a little earlier, just to put your plan in motion.

You picked out clothes from your dresses for about half an hour, finding stuff you haven't seen for years at this point, trying to put together the cutest outfit you could.

Settling for a sweet body-hugging skirt ending at the perfect length so that you won't flash anyone while just walking around, a transparent shirt showing everything except your breasts, carefully hiding them behind a soft sewn-in material, adorable tights and a pair of cute platform shoes.

Topping everything with a cardigan to hide away from the strict professors, who don't understand that clothes do not disturb their lessons.

After making sure you looked your best and sending a selfie to your friend group you got ready to officially start the day, hopeful that your efforts won't go unnoticed.

And to say that they didn't go to waste would be an understanding...

A couple hours later you walked into the art class full of already prepared canvas, Rafayel nowhere in sight yet. You noticed some girls talking to who you thought volunteered to be a model for today's project, probably someone who needed a quick cash, he wasn't bad looking, but not really your type either.

He looked too cocky, with good features and probably a gym freak, but something about him screamed ‘do not approach, he'd fuck anything that moves’.

A typical guy with nothing other on his mind than scoring a girl, pretty much proving you right when you saw him exchanging numbers with two girls that he probably just met.

Well not like you cared about that anyways, let them live their life or whatever like that.

Settling for a place in the corner, very close to the door, behind the others (meaning: they won't see what you're doing), and in a perfect spot for whoever sat at the professor's desk to see you clearly, you took your cardigan off and waited for your prey.

Luckily you didn't have to wait for long.

Rafayel walked in a minute later, not really glancing at the class on his way to put the heavy stuff he carried in his hands down.

You straighten up your back, trying your best to look lost in thought while staring at the blank canvas before you, moving a pencil in the air before it as if trying to imagine the lines you were going to sketch.

For a second you really got lost in daydream, inspiration flowing to you naturally, but before you could have started thinking about the details of your idea your train of thoughts returned to the current situation.

Now, how do you turn around unsuspiciously to check if he was looking at you.

Glancing at the pencil in your hand you began to slowly twist it between your fingers, trying your best to make dropping it look like an accident. Loosening up the pressure in your hand you let it fall to the ground with a soft thud.

Your face shot down, unhurriedly getting off your stool to pick it up.

You crouched down facing his desk, gently picking up your tool and lifting your head his way while standing up.

His eyes didn't leave you for even a second.

Watching the way your skirt rode up when you moved and the way you used your hands to fix it slowly, before finally his eyes went up to look at your face.

He didn't falter at being caught, too busy taking you in.

Not wanting to act weird and not really wishing for someone in your class to notice your weird behavior, you moved back to your seat, acting as if nothing happened.

Well to be honest the only thing that happened was your pussy waking up at his watchful gaze.

Why did he have to be so otherworldly hot? The universe wasn't fair.

You don't remember any other guy other than fictional ones that made you get aroused so fast. Why the fuck was it so easy for him? You didn't like acting crazy over some... Guys...

Not your style.

Okay, that's a lie, you didn't like it only because you couldn't fuck him, other than that you wouldn't complain.

“Alright, that's it for the waiting, whoever was supposed to be in this class today is already here.” You looked around noticing about half of the usual squad missing, people probably did listen to him saying that he doesn't want anyone coming here for nothing. For someone looking this cute he sure as hell had a way to sound harsh and cold, not taking anyone's bullshit.

You giggled into your hand quietly at the thought of him calling out people's idiotism.

“As you all know we last studied bodily anatomy. Most of you did good, some of you still need guidance, but that's okay, since everyone here has improved their technique over the past two months enough to pass a certain criteria.” You followed everyone's gazes, turning on your stool to face your professor, who was currently busy looking out of the window next to his desk. “I believe you already noticed today's model.” He glanced at the man currently busy making the girls blush, not mentioning anything else about him. “We have about 3 to 4 hours today, I want you to focus mainly on the full picture and try your best to capture your model with precision to each mole and mark, if you won't be able to finish in time, you'll simply add details another time since this isn't our last lesson on the topic.” He looked around the class, all eyes turned to him as usual, with his hand he gestured to the volunteer model to come to him.

Hall erupted in small talks as he focused on explaining something to the guy before sending him to probably get ready for hours of standing still naked.

“Nude art was first introduced to us back in Ancient Greek times, later on succeeding in stealing the spotlight in Western art, often presented as something controversial, back then - and now, together with the porn industry absolutely devaluing human body's worth.” The moment he began talking again the whole class quietened down, focusing all their attention on him. “People started portraying bare body as something only serving sexual purposes, thinking that the only purpose of nude art is to arouse the viewer.” He walked to the front of his desk, leaning on it while facing the small crowd. “Now personally I do not believe that the only purpose of it was to serve such a function, but people are free to believe what they want.”

Some people looked at each other, thinking about where the other's opinion stands, you glanced at them for a moment, but your eyes quickly returned to Rafayel.

“But also if you do believe that portraying human's body on canvas is only for it to serve as porn imagine, I do not know what you're even doing here.” He tilted his head for a second, thinking. “From the moment your model will take his pose you're free to start your work at any moment, you may also not work at all, I really don't care, just don't disturb the ones trying to make something beautiful.” He glanced at you for a moment, looking way too natural while doing so, but compared to him staring at the walls whenever he talked it surely wasn't a coincidence. “Do you have any questions before we start?” He shot a quick glance around.

“I do.” One girl from the other side of the hall stated, everyone's gaze momentarily turned to her. Rafayel quickly nodded his head her way gesturing for her to talk. “You said people portray the human body as something exclusively sexual. If not for sexual purposes, what do you think nude art represents?” She asked, not shying away from the topic, she was one of the devoted students, rather quiet one but you even liked her.

“It can represent a lot of things, depending on the artist's vision and the viewer's interpretation. It can portray emotions, feelings, meanings, anything you'd like. In today's world we hide away from nakedness, today's society makes us believe that showing our bodies is something to be ashamed of.” He could have talked about anything and you were sure you'd still hang on every word. His voice sounded so smooth each time he opened his mouth. “Making us feel like exposing the body we are born with is a crime. And while I agree that it is something intimate to see someone bare themselves before you, it's not half as intimate as baring your soul to somebody. And that soul is something that I want you to capture. Each painting has its soul, if you fail to capture it, you're taking away any life from your work. If you don't put your soul into your art, you are not a true artist.” He calmly said, stating his opinion effortlessly as always.

The corners of your mouth rose involuntarily, something about him talking about putting your soul into your paintings making you feel good. After all - each of your works contained part of you in them, having someone say that art has a deeper meaning than just colors on a paper looking nice felt good. Having someone with good values teaching you was nice.

Rafayel rounded his desk again, sitting in his chair while everyone focused on their conversations or preparations for painting. Your eyes didn't leave him for a moment, not caring if someone catches you staring, you wouldn't be the first to do it anyway.

Rafayel raised his eyes to you once again, clearly not by accident.

You shot him a quick grin, your small smile stretching up the moment he returned the gesture.

Your chest shook a little with quiet laughter, you had to fight yourself, biting your cheek to finally turn around from him to finally focus on the task at hand.

You didn't even notice when the model came back and got himself ready to be captured. Not caring one bit that someone hot stood naked not that far away from you. Thoughts occupied by the one and only Rafayel.

You took one deep breath to calm yourself down and relax, unknowingly sending your professor into a daze with the way your barely covered chest rose up before slowly falling back.

No one paid him no mind, their full focus on the naked guy before them, so he was free to stare all he wanted.

Your skirt barely covered your butt, showing off your entire pretty legs while you sat comfortably, you didn't pay it any mind, closing yourself for the outside world as you always did while painting, he admired that about you, the way the whole universe seemed to disappear for you the moment you picked up your tool of work, be it a pencil, crayon, paintbrush, literally anything.

You probably wore that on purpose too. He noticed you weren't usually the one for dressing up everyday, he couldn't help but wonder if it was all for him, having a feeling the tension between you was rising with each and every lecture he had with your class.

At first he didn't want to believe that you would return his interest so fast, prepared to give you years before finally trying something, he was a patient man after all, but you shattered his plans completely the moment your eyes met for the first time, making him a goner, nothing else mattered but you. He taught this class only because of you, and despite keeping his feelings at bay from the moment he saw you he failed his mission, unable to act like you didn't matter to him, he shouldn't have believed himself when he thought that he'll be able to stay away from you for so long.

But now seeing as you started making your own moves in this game of catch he knew that sooner or later he'll break.

Wanting nothing more than your soul to be his once again.

He didn't even notice how seconds turned into minutes, half an hour passing with him not moving his eyes away from you.

He should be talking about something, walking around the class and watching everyone's work, doing what he was hired to do (not like they would kick him out of the job anyways) but instead of that he put all his focus into studying you.

Your body, your face, your body language, your expressions, the way your hair rearranges itself on your head with every small movement, the way your hands worked on the canvas, the way you breathed.

You were truly a work of art in the purest form.

He couldn't help but make a mental note that you didn't often look at the model before you, maybe glanced at him three times and that was it, as if just those seconds were enough for you to recreate his image to perfection.

You didn't pay any mind to his staring, either ignoring it, playing hard to get or really not noticing anything around you while focusing on your art.

He was only forced to tear his gaze away from you when a student asked to check on their work.

And that's how he spent the next hour or so. Walking around between the canvas, giving advice here and there when asked for it, correcting someone's major mistakes (even if he didn't really care about those), giving small encouragements or simple nods of approval or simply staying quiet while watching someone's work from behind them.

But never once did he get to you.

He wasn't avoiding you, no, you just simply didn't pay any mind to his little rounds, stuck in your creativity even when needing to paint something specifically from your eyes only and not your imagination.

Noticing everyone's busy with their work he casually strolled your way, you didn't even spare him a glance.

Standing right behind you he began studying your work with great interest, every stroke of color on your canvas somehow turning out naturally perfect, effortless. You had talent and passion, he saw that in the way your works always seemed to have a soul, a meaning. You had what it takes to become a remarkable artist, and he couldn't be more proud of you.

Unnoticed by him he became so mesmerized by your art process that he didn't even register the way he slowly began leaning closer to you.

Until his torso met your shoulder gently.

He didn't move away, calm and collected, waiting for your reaction.

You titled your head for a moment to glance at him before continuing with your work as if nothing had happened.

His hands linked behind his back while he innocently decided not to pull away.

“Am I doing good, professor Rafayel?” You asked in a whisper, casually, as if his breathing didn't currently tickle your neck. You felt his body move slightly together with his subtle nods.

“Very. You're a natural.” He said into your ear, not bothering worrying if someone will see.

You couldn't help but let a proud grin appear on your lips, compliments from someone like him boosting your ego a little too much.

“Thank you, professor.” You glanced back at him again, with a playful glint in your eye.

His breathing got caught, you somehow managed to make a playful, cutesy tone sound seductive. Or maybe that was just his imagination?

He shot a quick look at the rest of the hall, not noticing anyone who'd look your way, your place on the edge of the class helping him in staying unnoticed.

Without thinking about it he looked down at you, unintentionally allowing himself to gaze at your covered breasts.

Did you not wear a bra? How come he hasn't noticed before? Well maybe because your shirt was way too good at keeping everything in the right position, embracing your body in all the right places.

He noticed the way you suddenly froze, turning your head around to send him a questioning look.

For a moment he didn't know what was wrong, but then he felt it.

His penis was poking your ass.

Holy shit he didn't even notice when he got a hard on.

His eyes widened while looking down at himself, his body leaning way too close to yours than morally appropriate.

He considered moving away and coming back to his desk to hide his little problem.

But then he noticed how your body slightly shook. His eyes returned to your face, you tried your best to hide your giggles, but couldn't hold back a cheeky grin on your face.

He watched you intensively, curious whether or not you'll make a move to get closer or pull away from him, since obviously you were not uncomfortable.

And a move you made...

Straightening up casually on your stool before reaching out for a paint a little too far away from you, knowing fully well that your perfect ass caught his attention when you bended your back for a moment before coming back to your sitting position, but this time moving way closer to him, making his dick throb in his pants at the contact.

Oh so you're one to play dirty? He's into that.

But he noticed a couple of lingering eyes on him, probably wondering why he spends so much time staring at your work.

Not wanting to raise people's suspicions just now he decided it was time to pause your little game for now.

Reaching out his hand he randomly pointed at something on your canvas.

“Add more shading here, it'll give more realism to your piece.” He said casually, as if he totally didn't think about shamefully rubbing against you just now.

You nodded your head approvingly, instantly moving to do as he says, fighting a smirk that threatened to show on your face.

Stay calm woman. Stay calm. He's the desperate one here.

You told yourself, despite the feeling of wetness accompanying you every time your thighs moved against one another.

But he doesn't need to know that.

As if nothing has occurred between you two he walked away from you. His slow steady footsteps echoing in your ears.

“I'll leave you alone for a moment, I trust that once I come back in 20 minutes the class won't be a battlefield, remember; paints are not a weapon, I do not want a brand new floor design.” He stated while walking out of the class, succeeding in making some students chuckle.

You couldn't help but wonder... Did he leave for a little bathroom break to take care of his problem?

Oh it's a shame you can't leave the class without drawing suspicions cause you would love to help him out.

As a good, exemplary student.

It didn't take you that long to come back to your stuck in mind state, all thoughts leaving at once, only you and the canvas before you existing.

A couple more glances at the model later you were halfway done with your piece, you took a peek at the clock on the wall, showing you that 2 and half an hour had passed since the class started.

Rafayel left the hall about 15 minutes ago, you couldn't help but wonder what was he doing...

Did he think about you while doing it?

Okay, stop, you can't be that needy yet, it was too early to get so excited over the thought of your professor getting off to the memory of your ass rubbing against him.

Just as you tried to bring your thoughts back to the right track the classroom doors finally opened again.

You didn't turn around, not letting him know that you were thinking about him, but you listened carefully to each step he took before his desk chair moved signalling him sitting down.

Silence overtook the whole room for a while, everyone trying their best to make their work look absolutely beautiful to gain a rare compliment from their professor.

You were finishing up when he spoke up again.

“We have half an hour left. Will anyone here need additional time another day to finish up?” His question met with about three raised hands, he only nodded, coming back to the papers before him, but by the movement of his hand over the sheet you could tell he wasn't filling out paperwork, he was probably sketching something.

“Professor Rafayel, did you ever had someone model for you?” You suddenly heard, everyone started glancing around, looking for a person who asked that.

You glanced at Rafayel, he seemed lost in thought, did he even hear the question?

Whispers started growing around you, you made eye contact with that one okay girl who simply shrugged sending you a confused look.

“No.” He answered without batting an eye. You looked at the girl again, both of your expressions showing disbelief.

An artist like that? Never painting a model? Never getting paid to paint someone?

Ain't no way.

“Why not?” A male voice spoke up, one of the three guy students in the class.

“No one ever made me feel inspired enough for me to ask them to model for me. And I was never interested in painting people for money.” Is that so...

“Would you paint your lover if you had one?” A bold girl asked, clearly one of the many with a crush on him.

Finally you saw Rafayel moving his eyes away from the paper and glancing at the classroom.

“Maybe.” He said, bringing people's whispers back with just one word.

You even heard someone jokingly throw the draw me like one of your French girls line.

Damn someone in this day and age remembered Titanic?

Your ears sadly picked up more conversations than you would like.

“Oh I could model for him all day.”

“I wonder if he would restrain himself while painting someone he likes nude.”

“How many things I would give up just to be his canvas...”

Talking like this about someone who's in the same room as them? Bold and stupid.

You at least could keep you quiet.

It was a lot more fun this way.

Those last couple of minutes till the lecture end were spent on conversations and moving around, cleaning up work stations and making sure that you didn't miss out any crucial detail on your work.

A couple people left already, and you finally started gathering your things.

Soraya, the girl you exchanged glances with before, came to your station.

“Can you believe the audacity of some people?” She whispered with a disgusted face.

“Nope, honestly, I cannot.” You send her a sarcastic grin.

“I get it, our professor is hot, but why do they have to act like he would ever even glance in their direction for more than half a second.” She said while throwing her bag onto her shoulder.

“Let them stay delusional I guess? What can I say.” You chuckled with her.

“Wanna go to that one cafe nearby the campus? My girlfriend finishes up her studies about now too, we can hang out for a bit.”

“Sure, why not, I have an hour or two to spare.” You nodded, gathering last of your stuff.

“Great~” She hummed out. “I'll wait for you before the classroom, I need to call her and ask where she'll meet us.” You nodded once again.

You met her girlfriend maybe two times before, she was an overall nice but unhinged person. The perfect balance between cute and dangerous, one would say.

You hurriedly turned around to pick up your cardigan from the floor, when your face collided with someone's chest.

Taking a step back you send whoever stood before you an annoyed glance, which changed into shocked one the moment you saw those pretty bluish-pink eyes staring right back at you.

Without a word he picked up your sweater and handed it to you as if it wasn't weird...

“Your work is great.” He glanced behind you at the finished painting.

“Why, thank you.” You squinted your eyes in slight confusion.

“Do you often draw silhouettes? Most of your work that I've seen are landscapes.” You nodded gently, still not really sure why he approached you like this, with people around you two...

“Yeah, I... I draw lots of things, including human anatomy, yes.” And not only human one...

“Aren't you a talented girl. Keep it up, you're doing a good work.” He said like it meant nothing coming from his mouth. So many people would die to hear those words from him, hear him appreciating their work.

And you were granted that honor.

Suddenly you noticed him leaning a little closer to you. “Better than anyone in this God-be-dammed school.” He whispered close to your ear before casually turning around and coming back to his desk.

What. The. Fuck.

Just when did you become a teacher's pet? Not that you're complaining of course...

Stopping your flood of thoughts you finally made your way out of the class, not acknowledging a beautiful pair of eyes following your every move, focusing on the smooth sway of your hips in that pretty skirt you wore today.

“What did the professor want from you?” Was the first thing you heard once you walked out of the classroom.

“What?” You didn't even have time to fully grasp what just happened when Soraya began her questioning.

“He legit came to talk to you about something a second ago.” She said while crossing her arms, looking at you like a police officer at a suspect.

You exhaled and shot your head up with a tired groan. “He complimented my work.” You looked at her for a split-second before walking away, hearing her footsteps right behind you.

“And did he need to be this close to you to simply compliment your work?” She teased, nudging you with an elbow.

“Oh pl-ease. He wasn't that close.” You glanced at her with a grin on your lips, instantly seeing a similar one appear on her face.

“Girl.” She chuckled, you only laughed and looked back at the huge corridor before you. “You like him.” She whispered into your ear with a slight disbelief. “I thought you said that he's a selfish rich guy with questioning morals...” She continued, making sure that none walking by students overheard.

“That was two months ago. People change.” You made an argument, closing the topic for now.

But you should know that it wouldn't be the end of this conversation, especially since she had to share the new found sensation with her girlfriend.

“Girl, what?!” Angela half screamed in shock staring right at you.

You were only sitting down for like 5 minutes before the whole topic came back. You shrugged while watching the girl process the information.

“Hottest professor in the history of our university, the one that people bet on who will get to fuck, the same one that humbles every girl that tried to make a move.” She stopped her wild hand gestures for a second, bending over the table to get closer to you, slamming her hands on it in the process. “Is interested in you?!” She whispered like a top-tier secret, looking into your eyes as if she could have read your mind that way.

“Honestly, I don't know.” You whispered back to her.

“What the hell do you mean you ‘don't know’?!” 'Raya butted into the conversation, also leaning on the table, it must have looked ridiculous from other people's views. “Girl I sat close to you this whole time, do you think I didn't notice how he was clinging to you while you painted.” She raised her eyebrows, looking at you like you had grown a second head.

“He did what?!” Angela screamed in a whisper.

“He was only standing close, it's not like he was hugging me or something.” Oh you knew you were lying.

Both girls froze up for a moment, their mouth opening in disbelief.

“Are you blind?”

“Or delusional?”

Not able to keep the calm act anymore you began laughing while covering your mouth.

”Damn she completely lost it.” Angela whispered to her girlfriend while looking at you.

“I'm fine, just... Holy shit!” They finally backed away to sit back straight. Perfectly in sync with the waitress bringing your ordered drinks.

For a moment you had to keep up the ‘we are normal’ play, but the moment the woman was gone the conversation rose back up.

“Okay girl, so do you actually like him or should we go to the higher-ups to fire him for harassing a student?” Angela looked at you with a suddenly serious expression.

You nodded your head. “I do like him. I didn't think I would, but damn... I do.” You stated while bringing your drink to your mouth for a sip-

“Do you want to fuck him?” And almost ended up spitting it out at this question.

“Angie...” Soraya laughed at the whole situation, facepalming at her girlfriend's curiosity.

„What?! That's an important question!” She defended herself. „So? Do you?” And the conversation came back to you again.

You exhaled loudly, trying to collect your thoughts, but you couldn't lie to yourself.

”Fuck yes.”

“See? I knew it!” Angela instantly argued with Soraya, who only nodded with a small chuckle. “Do you think he only wants to fuck you, or maybe date you?” And the questioning continued.

“I have no idea. But damn right I would date that hottie, but if it would only be a one time thing I'd still take it.” Girl no, you wouldn't - you already started planning what animals will you adopt after moving in together.

“Honestly I don't think that Rafayel is into one night stands, he seems like someone who would get hopelessly in love.” Soraya stated while playing with her drink's straw.

“I don't have lectures with him so I don't know.” Angie said but then started thinking for a moment. “Buuut... I talked with someone who does. She said that he talked about love as an ‘addictive pain’... He seems like a guy who despite acting nonchalant would love deeply, with his whole soul.” Angela got lost in her mind for a moment, as if dreaming about something.

“You won't understand an artist's mind when it comes to love, it's too complicated, especially for someone who seems so complex.” Soraya stated as if she herself wasn't an artist.

“I know... But honestly the idea that someone could love like this is so, so romantic. I'll stick to that mindset until you prove me wrong.” She looked out of the window, daydreaming about a perfect love story.

“Also if you were to start dating him... You'll need to hide it, and it will be tough for those next years, especially since he has students tailing him like a puppy wherever he goes.” Soraya continued with her monologue, breaking the tempting idea of dating a professor.

“By the way how much older is he?” Angie asked curiously.

“I think maybe 2 or 3 years?” 'Raya looked at you for clarification to which you simply nodded.

“Okay, then at least it's not creepy. Girl, you better fuck. that. guy.” Damn she's a little demon.

“Oh don't worry, I will try...” You took another sip.

Through next week's lectures you didn't really have an opportunity to tease your professor, but despite the inability for any physical contact without drawing unnecessary attention, your eyes continued to unconsciously look for each other.

Getting lost in his eyes proved to be too easy of a task, his beautiful irises hiding colorful ocean depths drew you in every time you raised your head to look at him.

You were falling for him.

Your heart beating faster each time he graced you with even a second of attention, your body shivering every time he passed by your desk, your pupils dilating with a single thought about him.

Feelings were a dangerous phenomena.

You didn't even notice when an innocent crush turned into something more, something that should exist only in fairy tales.

The worst thing? You didn't know how serious he was about you.

He didn't pay attention to anyone other than you, even going as far as to be straight up mean at any allusion made by others about wanting him.

But he never as much as glanced at you with the disgust he looked at others with, every time his gaze fell onto you something soft, something warm replaced the usual cold and cool.

Was that enough of a reason to allow yourself to fall in love?

Probably not, but the poems and stories you read before falling asleep made you a hopeless romantic, looking for someone able to sprout a seed of creativity in you simply by existing.

And he not only planted that seed, he made it grow into a tree full of flowers and fruits, bringing you thousands of ideas everyday.

You knew that it could hurt, the realization that maybe he was never interested in you at all would be a painful cut to your heart, turning millions of colorful butterflies living in you into moths.

You prayed for that day to never come.

You prayed for your tree to never wither.

Another day at university ended, people gathered their things, about to go on with their day, class emptying by the second.

But you stayed behind.

The professor who led the lecture left together with the students, something you haven't really noticed, too busy with drawing in your sketchbook, head in the clouds.

Inspiration came to you randomly, at first you were just bored with the discussed topic so innocently you began scribbling, making random lines that suddenly stopped being so random, your hands working their magic before your mind could keep up.

And suddenly the body on the page got a face.

Rafayel.

The figure not leaving your mind ever since you admitted to yourself you liked him.

You lifted your head for a moment, you were about to draw some details...

Noticing no one in the classroom anymore you breathed out in relief, no one saw what you were up to.

There are no more lectures for the day in here...

And you knew that no one would close you inside, as the cleaning staff always checks to make sure no one stays behind, having certain accidents before...

Taking out your earphones you made your decision. And the next half an hour flew by fast.

You were so detached from reality you didn't even notice the door behind you opening up, nor did you hear the slow footsteps coming your way.

Neither did you feel someone's presence right behind you...

And maybe that's for the better.

Since Rafayel doesn't know what would he do if you would randomly turn around and face him... After seeing what you drew.

Peeking over your shoulder his breath hitched for a moment while he forced himself to stay still and not disturb you.

You were drawing him.

Not only him, but... Naked him...

He felt his pants growing tighter with each second, every brush of your pencil on the paper making his head spin.

His heart couldn't take it. His dick couldn't take it.

Unable to face you after a discovery like this he turned around and without making a noise left the classroom.

It was too early... His plan was in ruins.

He was supposed to give you years to notice him.

Years before he would dare to touch you.

But oh my God, why did you have to make it so hard?

Making him pop a boner way too often and way too easily.

You were turning him into some pervert, which he was not. He wanted you for so much more than just your body, yearning for your soul and heart like a madman.

But the bedroom eyes you looked at him with, the slight ‘accidental’ touches you graced him with, your drawing, the way you pressed your ass against him in a classroom full of people...

You were playing a dangerous game, and despite not wanting to come out on the losing side, would he really lose if he'd gain something so precious in return?

What if you only wanted to fuck him? Use him? Go on and spread rumors about the professor being a pervert liking his student?

Would you really do him so dirty?

Walking through the hall at the lighting speed he finally made it to his office, walking inside he locked the door immediately, almost running to his chair with heavy breathing.

Losing up his collar he rested his head on the headrest of his office chair, closing his eyes while he tried to calm down.

You shouldn't have such influence on him, power over him.

But beneath his closed eyelids he saw only more of you, your silhouette, your face, your smile, those fake-innocent eyes, because you both knew you looked at him with anything but pure intentions.

And for whatever sick reason; he liked it, craved you, needed you.

No one else ever had him in their grasp, Rafayel from always being the one holding all the cards suddenly reduced to a pathetic horny man.

He loved and hated the feeling.

Knowing fully well you could use him and toss him aside like a trash bag after you're done.

But would you really? Would you ever break his heart like this?

Fuck he couldn't take it anymore.

Unable to stop himself he reached towards his belt unbuckling it hurriedly and unzipping his fly in a record time before finally taking out his cock.

Fuck he was sensitive, each vein pulsating, tip leaking precum simply because he couldn't keep his imagination in check.

Wrapping his palm around his length he began slowly pumping himself. His mind creating images of you he wished to see in person.

You on top of him, hands grasping onto his shoulder as you ride him, using him for your pleasure.

Oh fuck his hand began moving faster.

You would probably sound so pretty too, would you moan loudly or whine quietly into his ear?

Were you shameless with showing off your body or would you prefer to keep your clothes on?

He let out a moan at the thought.

Would you like it fast? Or maybe preferred the moment to be something sensual and gentle?

He would do anything for you, exactly how you'd like it.

His hand increased the tempo, wet sound filling the quiet study.

Fuck he was close.

Would you let him look into your eyes as you come? Would you shy away? You had no reason to, perfection in his eyes.

He would worship the ground you walked on, kneel before you, begged for you, he would do it all.

Would you prefer him to be in charge, acting like a little brat just to get a rinse out of him, wanting him to take it out on your pussy?

Would you be submissive? Accepting his everything, even if the overstimulation brought you to tears? Would you like him to call you his good girl?

His girl...

Back arched slightly from the chair, mouth opening to let out a silent moan, dick throbbing in his hand.

In seconds his entire palm was covered in sperm, together with the floor and a little bit landing on his shirt and pants, dirtying it.

Fuck he didn't remember the last time he came that hard, most of the days he forget that sex was even a thing, focused on his art, but ever since you came back into his life? This guy couldn't catch a break from the image of you naked underneath - or on top of him.

You were hunting him day and night, even in dreams.

And you were unaware of the effect you had on him, blissfully ignorant.

Cute. Really.

He took a minute to catch his breath, orgasm pulling all the energy from him, finally coming back to his self he couldn't help but came back to the situation that got him like this in the first place.

You were drawing him nude.

The very next day you had yet another lecture with your favorite professor.

Right after waking up you reminded yourself of a secret hidden inside of your sketchbook.

Memories of the lines you made with your pencil yesterday bringing instant heat to your cheeks.

Just what has gotten into you?

Why did you do this?

Also another, more important question: how the hell could you draw all of the details on his body just from memory that never existed?!

Unable to keep thinking about it without feeling the need to get yourself off you decided to finally get up and get ready for the day.

Starting a scavenger hunt in your closet you managed to put together a simple but cute outfit.

A tight white top on thin straps, no bra because you needed to keep your professor's eyes on you, and your boobs are going to be a great help in achieving that. Next was a white flowy skirt made from uneven scraps of silky material with a slit on your right thigh, perfectly fitting an artistic soul so to say. You added some cute white fishnets with a pretty design on their sides and put on a pair of white platform heels with ankle straps.

Looking at yourself in the mirror you couldn't help but feel pretty (author's note: because you all are pretty ♡).

Today will be another painting session, focused on abstraction, colors, and putting your feelings onto canvas.

A perfect setting for some chaos.

After your morning routine you finally made your way to the university, the place where you first came to continue your artistic journey and now are more focused with pinning after your professor than the actual studying.

Oh well, priorities I guess?

First lectures proved to be annoyingly boring, honestly some professors could think about changing the profession, cause what they were doing now was not going well, one of them didn't even seem like he knew what he talked about?

You had a little free time before Rafayel's lecture, Soraya and Angela used it to steal you from the main hall to find a private place to talk about very important matters.

Like literally steal you; they randomly walked over to you, hiked their arms under yours and dragged you with them, not explaining anything, stopping only when you made it to a more quiet location in the abandoned wing of the university where most people came only to deal drugs and other shit.

“How's your mission going?” They sat you down onto a bench and stood over you with their arms crossed, interrogating you.

“A mission?” You played dumb.

“Yes, a mission.”

“Called ‘fuck your professor before another bitch finds herself on him’.” Soraya added after her girlfriend.

“Quieter!” You reacted instantly.

Angie bended down to your eye level. “Not until you tell us your progress!”

“There's no ‘progress’.” You didn't back off.

The two of you stared into each other's eyes before she finally exhaled and moved away.

“Whyyy, from what 'Raya is telling me you basically eye-fuck him any change you get!” She lightly jumped in frustration, cute, really.

“Well it didn't go further than eye-fucking, sorry to disappoint you.” You send a disappointment glare at Soraya who only chuckled in response.

“Alright, angel, we really have to go to the lecture right now, I'll catch you later.” She kissed her girlfriend's forehead affectionately before taking your hand and urging you to stand up.

“See ya, just let me know later how's the situation~” Angela teased, to which you only sent her a death glare and turned around to leave with your classmate.

“You two won't let me off the hook huh?” You asked her on your way.

“Nope. But don't think so low of us, we are rooting for you to catch this man and steal him from all of those idiots here, it will be hilarious knowing that you're together while everyone continues to send him dreamy eyes.” She chuckled and you didn't know whether you should sigh or laugh.

A minute later you found yourself in the classroom, taking your usual spots you waited for the rest of the students and the professor himself to join in.

In the meantime you shared a look with Soraya more than once and each time she sent you a glare that could only be described as ‘get to work bitch’ to which you responded by rolling your eyes.

“Alright everyone.” You turn around to face the door at the familiar voice and sure enough your eyes meet the man who made your heartbeat race.

Class quietened down instantly, all eyes turning to him.

“Today we have another painting session, your favorite I know.” He walked over to his desk, opening up some papers and rummaging through them. “Now if I'm being honest, there is no final effect we're aiming for today. I want you to have fun with it, let your emotion onto the canvas, play with colors, tell stories through colorful spots on the paper if that's what you want to do.“ He looked up from the stack of papers, his gaze instantly falling to you. “Unleash the chaos.” He added before sitting down and returning his focus to his previous activity.

You glanced over at Soraya who was already watching you. ‘Stop it’ you mouthed to her to which she sent you a cheeky grin before turning her head towards her canvas.

The whole classroom stayed quiet for a bit longer, waiting for some more instruction from Rafayel, who didn't pay them any mind.

You were the first to move, picking out random paints and closing your senses to any third party stimuli, others followed not long after.

You didn't need to think about what you were doing, your hand holding the paintbrush smoothly moved around the canvas, creating something without any need to follow the image your mind usually made up first.

But the time spent between cleaning your brush and picking out another paint took too long, so without giving it any second thought you quickly wiped the paint on your skirt.

You heard some noises of disbelief coming from across the room, but you didn't even glance up at them, continuing with your work.

Soon enough one additional color on your white clothes was joined by others, a little blue here, pink there, green over here, but you still didn't care.

You wanted to be messy today, and where is it better to do that other than literal art classes?

You could feel the eyes turning to you every once in a while, people glancing up from their own works to watch the way your plain white outfit turned into canvas.

You also felt the way one specific pair of eyes stared into your back, knowing fully well who watched you most attentively.

But you won't give him the pleasure of your attention, he needs to try harder for that.

You didn't know how much time had passed, an hour? Maybe two? But you heard some people already walking out of the class quietly, finishing earlier than others as today's project took them less than the three whole hours you had the classroom available for.

At some point you dodged the paintbrush, settling for your fingers. It wasn't that long until your shirt began matching your skirt, followed by your hands and neck, a little color also found itself on your fishnets.

Too busy in your dreamland you didn't notice Soraya, who was already finished with her piece, taking out her phone and shooting you a couple pictures from the side before gathering her things and leaving.

You could hear footsteps echoing through the hall countless times, the only knowledge about the classroom emptying you got, since you didn't bother to actually look around and see who's left.

You didn't even notice how all noises around you fell completely silent, leaving only your gentle breathing and the sound of your fingers brushing the canvas.

Suddenly you noticed a hand slowly emerging from behind you, reaching for your stained with paint palm, turning it upwards.

You didn't need to look behind you to know whose chest was currently pressed against your back.

“Beautiful.” Was he speaking about your painting or..?

His hand slowly moved from your palm to your wrist, up to your elbow, his fingers leaving a purple trace on their way. You took a quick peek around, not a single person other than you two were left in the room.

His nose grazed your neck, you let out a shaky breath at the faint touch.

“I knew you'll do well today, but you exceeded my wildest expectations.” He whispered against your skin, his breath tickling your hot skin.

Your heartbeat skyrocketed, blush meeting the tips of your ears, but you didn't want to pull away, despite the fact that you didn't even know him that well you felt comfortable being so close to him, fitting against his body like a glove.

Suddenly you felt something warm and wet on your skin, letting out involuntary moan you reached your hand towards his face, currently busy with planting kisses against your skin.

You didn't care about your fingers dirtying his perfect face, he'll live.

And neither did he, too busy with finally being able to be this close to you.

Your head tilted backwards to his shoulder, your eyes fell closed as your hand found its way to his hair grabbing a handful to at least try and steady yourself while his mouth continued exploring all around your neck with hot kisses.

His arms embraced your waist tightly, holding you even closer to himself, your free hand grasped his wrist.

“You have no idea...” He whispered against your skin. “How much I wanted you.”

His hand which you weren't holding onto wandered to your chin, turning your face to him.

“Everyday I could only look at you but never touch, it was a torture.”

He took a moment to gaze into your drunk-like eyes before his lips crashed into yours, taking away your ability to breath.

Your fingers pulled at his hair before traveling lower to his neck, not letting him move away.

When did innocent stolen glances turn into this?

His teeth nipped your lip, forcing out a moan out of you and your mouth falling open slightly, giving him a perfect opportunity to push his tongue inside.

You didn't notice when his hand left your chin, too busy making out to allow your thoughts to linger.

That was until you felt something cold caressing your nipple through the thin shirt.

You broke the kiss, allowing yourself a moment to breathe and looked down.

His dipped in blue paint hand brushed your hardened nipple before his palm cupped your breast, allowing his thumb to draw circles around the sensitive bud.

You let out a shaky breath and leaned your head back to his shoulder once again, your eyes traveling to his which were currently busy observing the way your body responded to his touch.

His tongue ran over his suddenly dry lips, wanting more than just to touch you.

Without giving you a moment of breather he bent down over your shoulder, both of his hands moving to your chest while yours were forced to stay on the stool next to your body, stabilizing you, one of his palms continued massaging your bud while the other lifted your second boob to his awaiting mouth.

You let out a whine at his mouth sucking your nipple through your shirt, leaving a wet patch behind, your back arched pressing your chest straight into his passionate touch.

You become hyper aware of the wetness pooling out of you, your legs clenching involuntarily.

The now wet material of your shirt clung to your breast like second skin, your erected bud perfectly visible through the fabric.

Unable to resist the temptation any longer Rafayel moved his hand to pull the material down, exposing your pretty breasts to the cool air of the room.

Your shirt straps fell down your shoulders as your shirt held onto your stomach.

Moving a little bit away from you, Rafayel watched the way your chest rose up with each breath you took, but something was missing.

His eyes fell towards the pink paint not too far away from him, dipping his fingers in it before he returned his attention to you.

His fingers gently met your skin again. He savoured the way you arched your back as the cold substance touched your burning skin.

He watched mesmerized as your skin slowly turned into his personal art piece. But his patience proved to be rather thin when it came to you, as he couldn't keep his focus on being slow and gentle with you while your body begged for his attention.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” He asked in a raspy voice, not giving you the time to answer as his mouth returned to your now bared breast.

The explosion of sensations made your entire body tremble slightly, your hand shot up to his head, hugging him closer to yourself. “Ah... Y-yes-” Your shaky, quiet voice pleasured his eardrums. “Please, Rafayel... More.” You whispered as his tongue slipped out from his mouth to lick your now damp nipple.

“More?” He asked, not moving his mouth away from you, his hot breath caressed your skin. “You want more?” He sucked hard on your bud, pulling your entire breast up as his hand left it without support, traveling down your body, stopping on your lower stomach. “Do you need me here, cutie?” He let go of your breast with a plop, resulting in it jumping up a bit before settling in its place, the other still gently massaged by his other palm.

“Yes, please.” You whispered into his ear, opening up your legs as an invitation.

He felt his dick throb at the view.

The slit on your skirt exposed your thigh, giving him a perfect opportunity to sink his hand under the material.

Which he did.

His palm without rush traveled your entire exposed thigh before slowly moving his hand back up, this time; under the previously clean, white material.

Your hips moved impatiently to which he responded by squeezing your breast as a warning.

Your eyes rose up from his hand disappearing under your skirt to his face, he was already looking at you.

Keeping the eye contact you moved your hand to caress his ear while leaning on your other one still planted against the wooden surface of the seat, slowly from his ear you moved it to his neck once again, bringing his face closer.

“Please.” You breathed out a millimeter away from his lips, a second later catching them in a kiss. His hand squeezed your chest once again at the unexpected affection before he let himself drown in it.

It was weirdly sweet and gentle compared to the situation you were currently in, but he didn't change the tempo, leaving it soft and not rushing.

But his hand was much more wicked than his mouth, as with one sharp move he ripped the material of your fishnets right at your opening, you only managed to let out a surprised gasp that he swallowed.

His palm touched your pussy through the soaked material of your underwear, you parted your lips in a silent whine but didn't pull back from him, at least not before he applied preasure right at your clit.

Letting out a moan you bit your lip, remembering where you were, but there was no way in hell you'll be stopping him now.

His palm left your breast to fully wrap his arm under your chest, holding you close to him as his other hand began slowly moving in circles around your sensitive bud.

You let your face fall to his chest, his chin planted on the top of your head while you listened to his quicken heartbeat.

Unrushed, his fingers moved the wet material to the side and despite not being able to see you with your skirt in the way he still managed to find all your weak spots just by the sense of touch.

“Raf...” You whispered into his crumpled shirt as his fingers gently explored your slit without the fabric in the way.

“I know baby, don't worry, I got you.” He gave your forehead a soft kiss before dipping his finger into you without any warning.

You let out a quiet cry, tugging at his shirt.

You were so wet and relaxed he was able to pull his digit all the way in without any problems.

Slowly he began moving it inside you, listening to the squelching noise your pussy made with his every move.

“Shh, keep quiet for me.” He cooed into your ear before a second finger went inside you.

You clung to him like to a salvation, while he continued pleasuring you.

His fingers speed up their movements, more wet sounds filled the quiet and empty classroom.

You wanted to moan loudly, but forced yourself to bite your lip and take it silently.

“Good girl.” He praised noticing your struggles, his fingers speed up again while his thumb focused on your swollen clit.

Your mouth opened in response to the stimulation he put you through, eyes closing in delight as you felt your stomach clenching.

“I'm-” You tried to warn him to which he responded by quickening his pace even more, abusing that spongy spot inside you. “Clo- fuck- close!” You cried out, holding onto him tightly.

“Let go for me, princess.” He said and you couldn't hold it any longer, falling apart in his hands, going limp as he held you.

The sensation shot through your entire body, his fingers slowed down their abuse before gently retreating from your cunt.

Oh fuck that was the most intense orgasm you ever had.

Rafayel continued holding you while you slowly came back to yourself, breathing hard.

Just then you reminded yourself that you didn't think about his pleasure at all, you opened your eyes while your palm slowly moved down towards the tent in his pants. But before you could have squeezed his length through the material of his pants his hand came to stop you, grasping onto your wrist and pulling your palm away from his hard dick.

“Not today, princess.” He smiled at you, totally innocent as if his other hand wasn't still under your skirt.

Speak of the devil; as in the same moment he moved his palm from under your clothes and moved it up to his mouth.

You watched with widened eyes as he put his soaked by you digits into his mouth, testing you like he would savour an expensive dish.

You felt even more wetness leaking out of you at the view.

“Delicious.” He smiled again, unbothered by your surprise as he pulled you in for another kiss, you could taste yourself on his mouth as you got lost in the sensation once again.

The moment you pulled away you finally reminded yourself what you just did.

“Holy fu- We just...” You breathed out, looking at yourself in disbelief.

“We just had some fun together, well earned fun, might I add.” He said casually, caressing your cheek gently.

His eyes fell down for a moment, widening slightly at the sight of your bare breasts, full of love bites and paint. His dick won't go to sleep anytime soon, that's for sure.

He took a good while to take you in. Your hair didn't look messy, but still didn't look very fresh either, your top still rested on your stomach with the straps holding onto your elbows, waiting to be pulled up again, your skirt was full of colors placed there by you yourself through the lecture, now maybe your fishnets didn't look broken, however that was only because the rip was hidden behind your skirt, together with your soaked panties which were probably still planted to a side, right where he left them.

He felt his face heating up, you looked like a walking sinful masterpiece.

His masterpiece.

“Your clothes are dirty because of me.” He followed your gaze down to take a look at himself, and sure enough he noticed random patches of paint every here and there, but he didn't care.

“It's okay, I have spare ones in my office anyway.” He calmed you down.

Noticing how suddenly you saddened up he began worrying that maybe he overstepped, maybe it was too early for this step, maybe-

But you silenced his panicked mind with a simple hug.

He took a second to reciprocate, surprised by your affection.

You looked fragile in his arms, as if the whole confidence from an hour ago has left you.

He got worried that maybe he really did something wrong.

“We shouldn't have.” You said gently into his neck, not pulling back.

“We shouldn't.” He agreed.

“Do you regret it?” Your voice broke, as if you wanted to cry.

“No.” He answered instantly, not a hint of hesitation. “Do you?” You shook your head.

Pulling back from him you fixed your shirt to hide your chest, the material didn't lay on you as good as it did before but it had to do for now.

“You're my professor.” You looked into his eyes, he looked at you with worry plastered on his face, nodding his head gently. “No one can know.” You said and stoop up from your seat on shaky legs.

Instantly his hand caught your waist to stabilize you, to which you responded with a grateful smile.

“It will be our secret.” You said while not moving away from him just yet. He nodded once again, too stunned to speak, you didn't just turn around and leave him alone after you got what you wanted?

You smiled at him again, looking like an angel in his eyes.

Pulling even closer to him you gave him one more kiss, savouring the feeling for later.

And then finally you turned around gathering your things slowly.

You heard him walking away, but didn't glanced back at him, a sound of a key turning in the lock broke the silence. You reached under your skirt to fix your panties, which didn't feel comfortable as of now at all.

But then when you picked up your bag from the floor you felt something dropping onto your shoulders.

His cardigan.

You looked behind you while holding the edges of his sweater together.

Without any words he simply kissed you once again, putting all his feelings into that one, last peck.

Pulling apart felt like a crime, but you had to.

“Have a good day, professor.” You turned around and moved away, glancing one last time over your shoulder before going through the door.

Luckily there wasn't anyone on your way through the university's hallway as most people already finished with their lectures for today.

You walked out of the building and took a very much needed breath of fresh air.

Your mind worked overtime, what will happen after today?

Will he act like he didn't do anything?

No, there's no way he will, right..?

Your legs still felt like jelly and with every step you took you could feel the way your abdomen squeezed in uncomfortable motion. Your long and hurried steps didn't help it, as you wanted to make it home as soon as you could.

You needed your bed, or a bath, preferably both.

You picked out your phone to check the time, noticing that it was an hour after your usual lecture ending time.

Next thing you noticed were notifications from social media and your group chat with Sora and Angie.

The Normal One

[5 images send]

if our professor won't tap that I know people who would

The images were you during the lecture, specifically you sitting and focusing on your painting, outfit dirty from paints, not caring about the world even a bit.

You had to admit you looked hot.

Horny Demon

IM GIVING HIM ONE WEEK MAX BEFORE HE WILL LOSE HIS CHANCE

The Normal one

sure, we both know that you just don't want to lose our bet

Horny Demon

I NEED THAT ICE CREAM U PROMISED OKAY?

Anyways where the hell is our teacher s pet?

@.Professor's Princess wake the fuck up

The Normal One

the lecture should have ended like 30 minutes ago

Horny Demon

SUS

The Normal One

why?

Horny Demon

DID SHE FINALLY FUCKED HIM???

The Normal One

hell nah... I think

Horny Demon

@.Professor's Princess @.Professor's Princess @.Professor's Princess

IF YOU WONT ANSWER IN THE NEXT 5 MINUTES IM CHANGING YOUR NAME TO PROFESSOR S SLUT

The Normal One

lmao even threats started

Horny Demon

I NEED TO KNOW!!!

The Normal One

let me just tell u that if she actually does fuck a professor rn u won't know until later, so be patient baby ❤️

Horny Demon

Fu

The Normal One

is that a proposition?

Horny Demon

:*

The last text was from 10 minutes ago. You ran your fingers through your hair and took a moment to gather your thoughts before answering.

Professor's Princess

I'm here

Instantly you saw the ‘viewed by...’ under your message.

Horny Demon

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN YOUNG LADY?

Professor's Princess

Guess :p

Horny Demon

OH YOU SO WERE WITH UR HOT PROFESSOR

The Normal One

you don't respond to my messages that fast lmao

Professor's Princess

10 points to Hufflepuff 👏

Horny Demon

OH MY GOD???

The Normal One

ain no fucking way.

Horny Demon

YOU FUCKD HIM?!!!

Professor's Princess

not yet ;)

Horny Demon

???

ARE U HOME YET???

Professor's Princess

Getting there

Horny Demon

CALL US THE MOMENT YOULL WALK THROUGH THE DOOR WE HAVE A URGENT TOPIC TO DISCUSS!

Professor's Princess

yes, ma'am

The phonecall lasted an hour, at some point you were making yourself food in your underwear while talking to them about what happened, too lazy to put on fresh clothes.

Their reactions to the knowledge about the Rafayel finger fucking you in his classroom were absolutely priceless.

Angela screamed and dropped her phone, running around her apartment like crazy (luckily her roommate wasn't home), while Soraya opened up her camera just to show you her shocked expression that lasted 2 minutes before she started laughing so much she couldn't breathe.

Once again they promised not to tell anyone your secret, teasing you for seducing your professor for the whole hour after which you finally said goodbye.

You sat down on the couch with your food, turning on the TV on some random channel to entertain yourself during your dining.

The feeling of his fingers working deep inside you didn't leave your memory for even a second. Holy shit you actually did it.

Glancing at the carelessly thrown onto the floor clothes you felt your cheeks heat up.

He made you feel so good, so comfortable... As if you knew him for much longer than two and half months, as if your body recognized him, craved him the way your mind did.

For whatever reason you believed that he won't hurt you, won't break your heart, instead treating it like his dearest treasure.

Your eyes moved to your half finished dinner before turning to the TV screen where main characters currently confessed their love to each other in some depressive settings.

Then you looked down onto yourself.

A random loose t-shirt thrown onto your bare upper body hiding the material of your underwear almost perfectly. Of course it was fresh underwear, the other one felt too uncomfortable after your juices completely drowned it...

You moved to lay on your back, knees up, opening your legs slightly.

Your hand moved down to caress your clit through your panties...

You didn't know why but the sudden need for relief was too hard to resist. Closing up your eyelids you reminded yourself of the way his body pressed into you through the fabrics of your clothes, the way his hard length, that you didn't have time to play with, felt, the way his eyes gazed into yours, watching you attentively as you surrendered to the pleasure he graced you with.

Your fingers slipped under the damp material, you let out a shaky moan.

“Rafayel...” You whispered into the night.

Unknowingly to you: your little fun disrupted someone's attempts at painting...

With each second of your body falling deeper into the pleasure he could feel it in his whole body, his mind clouding with memories of your sounds and expressions, your painted body showing before his eyes each time they fell closed.

Oh how much he would give to be next to you right now...

But he had to settle for less as of now.

His hand traveled past the waistband of his loose pants, his vivid imagination showing him sinful images of what could have happened if you were next to him right now.

And together but separately you chased after the pleasure, calling out each other's names into the nothingness as you let yourself go, wanting only one thing.

To cross all boundaries.

“I heard bitches from my class talking about your man like they were dogs in heat.” Angela complained while sitting next to you and Soraya.

All three of you had some free time before the next lectures and decided to kill some time in the academy cafeteria.

“My man?” You raised your eyebrows in confusion.

“Your future man if you want to focus on the details, which we don't do, cause he's your man already in my eyes.” She added, looking at you like you just insulted her entire family.

You nodded slowly, picking up your drink to run away from the topic.

“I swear I'm this close to closing you and him in some empty room just to force you to talk about your feelings.” Yeah, she wasn't about to drop it.

“Our feelings? How do you know how he feels about me, he might as well just be playing around.” You voiced your concerns out loud, even though you tried not to think about that possibility.

“Girl, are we deadass right now?” Oh she was mad...

“Honestly if he was just playing with you as you said, he wouldn't get you off and treat you like a porcelain while not letting you touch him at all to return the favor.” Soraya finally spoke up. “Guys think with their dicks, if he didn't feel anything towards you be wouldn't act like... That.”

“How can you know how guys think? You have never dated one in your entire life.” You said jokingly, but honestly grateful for the reassurance.

“Are we for real right now? Who doesn't know how the male gender works?” She looked insulted, you chuckled at the sight.

“Anyways.” Once again you turned your head to Angela. “I'm sure that he likes you back. Really, from what you told us he seems crazy over you, dare I say.” Suddenly instead of a playful, mischievous spark you saw honesty in her eyes.

“I wish I could believe that, but really we haven't talked even once. It's all about stolen glances and touches away from prying eyes. I just wish he would tell me what am I to him, but really we have no way of even having this conversation.” We have no right to be, you thought.

”Oo-ooh...” You glanced at 'Raya, noticing her eyes focused on something in the distance, following her gaze you and Angela turned around.

Rafayel was standing in the entrance to the hall with his arms crossed... Looking straight at you...

“Someone's in trouble..?” Angela whispered to you, staring at your professor.

“I don't think so..?” You whispered back.

Noticing how your attention was finally on him he grinned slightly and turned around to leave. Suspiciously glancing back at you over his shoulder before disappearing.

“Go to him.” You looked over at your classmate, unsure. “Ain no way he was here by accident, looking at you like he wanted to eat you whole, run, girl, I think your talk is due.”

Not waiting for second thoughts to appear you stood up and fixed your dress, abandoning your almost finished lunch in the name of what you think was love...

“Be ready to buy me those ice cream.” Angie said, looking in the direction where you disappeared a second ago. She heard a snort coming from her girlfriend and smiled, hoping for the best for you.

Meanwhile you were busy chasing Rafayel's shadow while trying not to look too suspicious to the students you passed.

Damn this building was really huge, you remembered how many times you lost your way during your first year here.

Taking another turn you didn't see him in front of you anymore.

There were three corridors before you and no sight of Rafayel... Where could he go? It was a wing full of storage rooms, almost no one passed by here on accident.

Looking around you noticed one door on your right slightly ajar, soft light coming from the inside.

Unable to turn back now you slowly strolled towards the door, coming close enough to it you took one deep breath before reaching for the door handle and opening it wider without any rush.

First thing you noticed was a painting work place, canvas turned away from you, not letting you see what's on it, then your gaze moved to the side, a silhouette looked out of the window, as if oblivious to your presence.

For a moment longer you contemplated turning around and walking away, but then you heard his voice, “Leaving already?” And instantly you froze with a hand still holding onto the door handle.

You swallowed nervously, feeling a lump in your throat. “I didn't want to disturb you, professor, sorry.” Your voice sounded unsure, even though you tried your best to hide your stress.

It was easier when he made the first move...

You waited for him to say something, each second dragging like hours spent in the room without anything to do but think.

Noticing how he didn't move an inch, still facing away from you, you began feeling shy, as if all the things that happened between you weren't truly real, as if it was something completely made up by your mind.

You took a step back. “I should-”

“Don't go.” Finally his head turned your way, his eyes falling onto your hesitant form.

He looked... Sad?

You looked at each other for a moment, holding your breath as if letting it out would pop the bubble you created around yourself.

Then you finally took a step forward, then another one, closing the door behind you.

All the while keeping eye contact with the man of your dreams.

The silence lasted a while longer, either one of you not knowing how to start this conversation.

And when you finally opened up your mouth you noticed him walking towards you hurriedly.

“Professor-” His lips landed on yours, your bag fell to the ground.

You let out a high pinched squeak from the shock, instinctively trying to pull away but he didn't let you, his palms raised to your face, holding it sternly but without causing you any pain.

Your hands reached up to his elbows, grasping onto them to steady yourself, eyes falling close as you reciprocated the maddening kiss.

His lips moved against yours like there was no tomorrow, as if he needed you like air.

He took a step closer to your body making you stumble, your faces broke away from each other for a moment, “Rafa-” He didn't let you finish, instantly leaning in again to kiss you.

Your body met with the wall behind you, his palm fell to the back of your head to ensure you won't hit it too hard, his other hand reached behind you to lock the door with a key before returning to you, embracing your waist.

Your hands fell plain to his torso, you didn't know what was happening, all the stress from a minute ago seemingly disappearing, but the uncertainty stayed there.

You were busy making out for at least a couple of minutes, swallowing each other moans at the slightest touch of your bodies, but you had to finally break away from the kiss because of the need to breathe.

Turning your head to the side you let his lips fall to your cheek, both of you breathing heavily.

“I have another lecture to attend.” You said quietly, not really wanting to move away.

“I'll take care of that later, just stay with me.” He answered and you weren't going to argue.

You turned to face him once again, your bodies pressed together tightly, you could feel his penis hardening up against you, your cheeks heat up.

“We really shouldn't.” You said while looking into his eyes.

“Do you want to leave?”

You shook your head. “Hell no, I dreamed of you every day.” You confessed, watching his ears gain a pretty pink color.

“Then stay, and let me devour you.” His lips fell onto yours again, hands grabbing onto the material of your dress while his body continued pressing you into the wall.

Your arms embraced his neck, holding him tightly, the thought of him moving away unbearable.

“Please, professor.” You breathed out against his lips, unable to tear away from him. “Take care of me.” His hands slid down to your ass, grabbing it tightly before forcing you to jump onto him, your legs wrapped around his waist without a protest, the skirt of your dress rode up.

Making sure to keep you steady in his arms he walked over to his desk, not stopping his abuse on your mouth for a moment, his tongue meeting with yours.

One of his hands left you to throw off the things laying abandoned on his desk before sitting you down on it.

His hands began exploring your covered body, not letting an inch of your skin go untouched, from your back to your shoulder, stomach to chest, thighs down to your knees.

He wanted to imprint the way you felt into his mind, paint your image into the back of his eyelids to see you every time he closed his eyes.

He was drowning in your presence and didn't even want to look for saving, accepting his fate with open arms and heart.

His fingers digged into the skin of your thighs, your hips moved involuntarily, raising to meet his.

He let out a moan at the touch, the friction making his dick twitch in his pants.

Oh you were playing with fire and were not afraid to burn.

Your hands moved from his neck to his collar, hurriedly unbuttoning his shirt, the need to feel his bare hot skin too hard to resist.

You popped out the last button, palms instantly coming to touch him, caressing his soft skin roughly, you were dreaming about the moment you'll finally be able to touch him like this.

Fuck morality.

His palms moved back to your ass, bringing you to the edge of the desk and up to meet his hips.

Your lips moved in sync while you grinded onto each other like there's no tomorrow.

He pulled back from you just to drop his head to your neck, planting open-mouthed kisses on your skin, loud and wet.

You arched into his touch, not wanting to be separated from him for even a second, his fingers traveled under your dress, just like the last time - teasing you through your panties.

“You're already soaked.” He whispered into your skin, coming back to worshipping your neck right after.

You shamelessly rubbed against his fingers, seeking them out, needing them to touch your clit, to sink into you, touch you the way you needed.

Your palm wandered down to his pants, pressing against his hard on.

“Ah-” He moaned surprised, throbbing against your hand.

You began playing with his belt clasp, your mouth opening in a silent whimper when his hand started moving against you faster in response to your actions.

Not wanting to get a princess treatment like the last time you made a quick work with opening up his belt and letting it drop on the floor, unzipping his pants a second later.

But before you could slip your hand into his boxers, his fingers proved to be faster, moving beneath your panties to press against your bare clit.

You couldn't sustain your moan, hips moving up in a reflex, pressing into his palm.

His hand began drawing circles against you, sucking onto your collarbone hard enough to leave marks.

But you didn't let him have all the fun.

Your palms brought the material of his underwear down, exposing him to the cool air of the room.

He stood tall in your hand, precum glistening from the head, you could barely see it with his shoulder in the way of your vision.

But you didn't need to.

Tightening up your grip you began stroking him, feeling each vein pulse against your fingers.

You relished in the soft sounds he let out against your neck, his hot uneven breath tickled your skin.

And then he struck back.

Two of his fingers stretched you out, your thighs tensed up for a moment before letting go, your body accepting the intrusion.

You were so wet you didn't feel any pain or discomfort, that was the way he affected you.

Your hand began moving again in sync with his digits working inside you, he stopped with the kisses, but left his head pressed to your shoulder, needing to be close to you.

You pleasured each other, enjoying every sound made by your bodies, the way your cunt squelched with every move of his fingers, the way you could hear your hand working on his dick, the feeling of his precum smearing across him with every stroke, the way your hearts seemed to beat in sync, and the way your breaths heavier with each second.

Your head empty, leaving only the current moment to matter, nothing outside of this study worthy of your attention.

Suddenly his fingers thrusted into you surprisingly hard, staying knuckles deep in your cunt for a moment, as if taking in the feeling of your clenching walls, you let out a loud moan when they pressed into that one spot making you see stars.

Your palm gripped his dick in response, making him groan.

“I need you.” He panted under your ear, taking out his digits from your hole and taking a step back making you lose your grip on his manhood.

You looked at him questioningly, but didn't have time to voice your thoughts when he grabbed your hips making you stand up.

“Raf-?” He turned you around, making you bend over until your chest met the hard wood of his desk.

You looked over your shoulder, feeling him hitch the material of your dress up, letting it stay wrapped on your waist and moving your panties down, not even letting you step out of them when they fell to your ankles before his chest pressed against you.

You felt the head of his dick pressing against your clit before he used one hand to raise it up to your opening.

“Can I, princess?” He kissed your shoulder gently, using his hand to drag his penis up and down your slit, not daring to put it in without your permission.

You nodded your head hurriedly. “Please, professor, I waited for so long.” You let out, bracing yourself against his desk, preparing for what comes next.

“You're getting off to the thought of your professor fucking you? And here I thought you were more innocent, turns out you're a naughty girl huh?” You grinned to yourself at his teasing, close to letting out a giggle until you felt his head pushing in.

You opened your mouth in a silent moan, head falling down to lay on the hard surface as your eyes rolled to the back of your head.

Slowly he slid into you, inch by inch, your walls welcoming him in.

“Oh fuck-” You whispered when he pushed last inch in, fitting so well inside you.

You felt his hot breath on your back, his hands moving to grab onto your waist, holding you tightly.

He gave your skin one last affectionate kiss before starting to move, leaving your heat halfway before pushing in again, your body rocked with his thrust.

He didn't stop after that, slowly finding his rhythm.

Your hands gripped onto the edges of the desk, he felt so good, like you were meant to fit together,

“Please, faster.” You plead him, looking over your shoulder to meet his lust driven eyes.

“Oh? Is that not enough to satisfy you, princess?” Fuck, his unusually deep voice did things to you.

Feeling you clench at his comment he chuckled in a low tone, as if amused.

“Do you need something more like...” He gripped your waist tighter, fingers digging into your skin. “This?” He thrusted into you harshly, making the entire desk move. You cried out, arching your back.

He repeated the motion, this time moving his hips back until only the head remained inside you before sinking in deep, his balls hitting your clit.

You moaned at the stimulation, wanting nothing more than for him to fuck you forever.

“Tell me, princess, do you like it hard, like this?” He began thrusting again, his tempo increased, not acting gentle now in the slightest, taking what he wanted; what he knew you wanted.

You were like a doll in his arms, ready for him to do anything to you, you could take it.

His fingers took a grip on your hair, pulling your head back harshly, making you arch deeper.

“I asked,” He said right next to your ear, not stopping his hips for a moment. “Do you like it?”

“Yes-” You tried to make a sentence but he sped up the tempo at the same time you let out a word, “Fuck- yes, professor! Please fuck me hard!” You nearly screamed, forgetting where you are.

“Good girl.” He praised, fixing his angle to penetrate you deeper, hitting all your weak spots. You felt your mind go dumb, pussy clenching around him at his words. “I'll give you what you want.” He straightened up, letting go of your hair.

He gripped your waist and hips, his length restlessly moving in you, not giving you a second to breath.

Oh fuck he hit so deep-

You felt your orgasm begging to build, walls involuntarily tightening up around him.

You heard the prettiest, nastiest moan leaving him the moment he felt you clench around him.

His hand left your waist to move to your clit, pressing and caressing it roughly.

You choked on your scream, feet moving to stand on your toes.

You didn't know whether you tried to move your hips back against him, allowing him to hit your sensitive spots even easier, or pull away from his dick at the overwhelming sensation.

“You gonna come for me?” He asked, almost out of breath, feeling close himself, but not wanting to reach his peak before you.

You nodded your head weakly, hips thrusting back against his rapidly, pleasure consuming you.

Wet sounds of sex echoed from the walls, massaging your eardrums in the best way.

“Rafayel-” You let out a yelp, his hand working against you, guiding you to the pleasure you didn't know before.

“Come for me, princess.” Fuck you couldn't take it anymore.

Your pussy clenched around him as if wanting to keep him there forever, hands bracing against the desk to keep you from hitting your head, legs shaking.

You let out a pornographic moan, riding out your intense orgasm.

You wanted this for so long.

Despite the hand from your clit going missing he didn't stop his abusing thrusts, desperate to reach his peak, overstimulating you. “Professor-” You let out weakly, arm reaching behind you to press against his stomach.

“You can take some more, can't you?” He whispered, lost in his pleasure.

You moaned in protest, not sure whether you could handle him for much longer without a break.

He gave you one hard thrust before going still for a moment, balls deep inside you.

You thought he stopped for good, but then he reached for your leg, moving it up until your knee touched the surface of the desk, your panties laying flat on the floor around your other feet.

“Just a little more, baby.” He said, grabbing your ass and looking at the way your pussy stretched out around him.

Then he began moving again, instantly going fast.

You moaned, tears swelling in your eyes at the overstimulation, but you can take it; for him.

“Fuck, your cunt feels so good.” He whispered with invisible to you hearts in his eyes.

You stayed obedient, taking what he gives you, needing his release like you needed painting: necessary for the peace of your soul.

“I'm close-” He moaned out, losing his rhythm.

“Come inside, please!” You begged, looking over your shoulder with pleading eyes.

He looked uncertain.

“I'm on the pill, please, give it to me, Rafayel.” You grabbed the shirt that stayed on his shoulders this entire time, not allowing him to move away from you.

That argument seemed to work, because in a second he reached for your hand, clasping it with his own while the other embraced you tightly, pulling you to him.

“I'll give my everything to you, princess. You don't even need to ask.” He pulled up his hand from your waist to your chin, making your head tilt to the side, swallowing your moans in a kiss.

And then; he came.

Stopping his movements inside you with his dick filling you up to the fullest, throbbing while his cum shot into you.

You moaned into the kiss, both of you hungry for each other, open mouths moving against one another with full intention of sucking the other's soul out.

He pulled away to breath, his forehead meeting with yours, eyes closing when he came back from his high.

It took him a moment, but he had to finally pull out his softening dick from your warm and comfortable walls.

His cum leaked from you the moment he pulled out, he almost got hard again at the view, but he couldn't let himself go that far just yet, he needed to take care of you first.

He pulled up his underwear and pants in a rush, you stayed in the same position he left you in, trying to get your breathing to steady.

He pulled your leg down from the desk, holding your waist to make sure you won't fall when standing up, one of his hands moved to help you raise your other leg up, letting your panties fall to the floor completely.

He moved to his desk chair, holding you tightly and making you take a step with him before he fell onto the seat, pulling you after him to sit on your side on his lap.

Your head fell to his shoulder, chest raising up and down rapidly, heartbeat still going crazy.

He hugged you tightly, letting you rest in him for as long as you'll need it. His palm reached to brush your hair from your resting face before falling once again to your back, caressing it softly.

“You were perfect.” He whispered into your hair, planting a sweet kiss on your head, hearing your content sigh at the gesture.

He noticed you opening up your suddenly heavy eyes, gazing up at him.

“Hm?” He looked right back at you with a small smile.

Your hand moved up, touching his cheek gently and bringing his face to yours, your lips meet in a soft kiss, the simple affection providing comfort to the both of you.

You didn't know yet what that meant to your relationship, but one thing was obvious:

There's no way you'll let each other go separate ways after that.

Your kiss broke, your head falling into the crain of his neck as you cuddled.

Your eyes opened lazily to take in your surroundings, something you didn't have time to focus on before.

The walls were in a cold blue tone, floor and the furniture in dark brown, ceiling plain white.

It wasn't much, but it felt cozy, despite the melancholic feeling it brought you.

Then your eyes picked at something you saw earlier, but from a different angle.

The canvas you noticed before bears an unfinished painting of a female silhouette in a white dress sitting on the road, drawn from her back, she watched an ocean that spread in the distance, between the trees on the sides looking like they opened up before her to show her the view.

Beautiful, like each work of Rafayel's.

You didn't linger on who might be the woman in his painting, too tired to think.

“Tired?” He asked as if reading your mind. You nodded into his chest, not wanting to move an inch away from his embrace.

A moment of silence followed before he spoke up again.

“I need to get you home.”

“Already?” You murmured, still not moving.

“Everyone's in lecture right now, it'll be easy to sneak off through the side entrance.” He explained with a chuckle at your behavior.

“Yhym, okay...” You agreed, still not moving-

He chuckled once again, standing up with you in his arms and placing you back onto the chair, without him under you for support.

You opened up your eyes again to send him a questioning glance, but he didn't take notice of it, walking over to the other side of the room and opening up one of the shelves.

You watched as he picked a folded black fabric and began taking off his pants.

Your eyes widened but you didn't turn around, taking in the sight of his legs...

“It's not nice to stare, you know.” Looking up you noticed that he was watching you with a smirk.

You blushed a little but also grinned slightly.

“I'm just enjoying the show,” You said to which he only shook his head and unfolded what turned out to be a fresh pair of pants, putting them on. “Why are you changing?”

He looked over at you with an even bigger smirk. “Because someone's pussy left stains that would look too suspicious for others.” He watched as you suddenly got shy, hiding your face in your knees. Cute.

Laughing he buttoned up his shirt, leaving the last two buttons open, then he picked up another fabric from the shelf before closing it and moving back to you.

You felt his arm embracing you and pulling you up to stand which you did without a protest.

The uncomfortable feeling in your legs and stomach was back, you let out a sigh before you could stop it.

“It's okay. I'm here.” He said while holding you tightly to his body, comforting you when you didn't even know you needed it.

You felt his hands traveling past your waist to your sides, his fingers fixing the previously pulled up by him fabric to cover your ass again, you felt something soft wrapping around you a second after.

Glancing down you noticed he covered your legs with a blanket, wrapping it around your waist.

Without waiting for any comment he picked you up princess style, holding the fabric to your body together with your bag that he picked up from the floor a moment earlier.

Your hands came up to his neck immediately, sending him a questioning gaze.

“Hold tight and press your face to my shoulder.” He began walking to the door with you.

“What if someone recognizes me anyway?” You did as you were told anyway, not in the mood to be rational.

“There's no cameras on the path we'll take and everyone has lectures in a different wing, as you probably already know, besides: do you really think I care about this job enough to give a shit?” He unlocked the door, giving you a fake-hurt expression before focusing on walking down the quiet corridor.

You pressed your face tighter into him, enjoying the way he carried you in his arms, even if you should be scared half to death right now.

“It's really risky.” You mumbled, not really caring at this point.

“Not enough of a reason for me to let you walk back home on your own again, I already failed at taking care of you once, won't do it again.” You looked up at the side of his face, could you fall even deeper for this guy?

You squinted your eyes the moment you walked through the exit door, sunlight not sparing your eyeballs the pain.

He carried you all the way to his car before letting you down right before the passenger doors, fishing up the key from his packet that he picked up from the floor earlier after he threw off everything from the desk...

Clicking a button he heard the car unlocking, instantly he reached to open the door for you and make sure you and the blanket are both tugged inside before closing them.

He glanced around; no living being in sight.

Walking around the car he finally sat in the driver's seat, giving you your bag back.

He turned on the car and drove off in silence that stayed for longer, both of you comfortable just sitting in each other's presence.

You searched through your bag for your phone, finding it pretty fast you unlocked it to see whether you had any new messages.

There were a few not from the group chat, but from the private chat with Soraya.

Ray of Pessimism

some people in class asked why u disappeared, I said u threw up in the bathroom and went home, make sure to follow the sorry tomorrow or we're fucked

story* fcking autocorrect

btw i'm not sending it on groupchat cause apparently angie got some assholes in her next class that don't know what's privacy, she hid the chat but if we send smth there it will be visible again, so wait until she'll give u the greenlight to text there

after all we don't want u or ur hot professor in trouble, do we now

You giggled a bit, not caring about Rafayel's gaze turning to you curiously.

Me

Got it, and thank you, I'll make sure to stick to your story :p

ttyl

You put your phone back into your bag, gazing out of the window.

“Penny for your thoughts?” You turned back to Rafayel whose eyes were fixed on the road.

“Just thinking about... Us.” You exhaled, still not sure what to call the situation you found yourself in.

“What about us?”

“Just... What are we, and what we're supposed to do with this situation.” He glanced at you, not looking stressed in the slightest.

“What do you want us to be?” He asked, like the answer was the easier thing to say out loud.

“I'm... Not sure?” You said uncertainty, wishing for him to make the decision.

“Not sure huh? Because I think you're pretty sure, actually.” He stopped the car and got out of it a moment later, like he didn't just make your overthinking go wild.

The door to your side opened and only then you finally noticed that you were next to your place of living.

Wait, how did he know where you live-

He offered you his hand which you took, carefully exiting the vehicle on your still shaky legs.

He walked you over to the doorsteps, supporting you all the way to make sure you won't stumble and fall.

Right before your door you turned around to face him, unsure of what should be said.

Both of you stood in silence for a moment, looking at each other and thinking too much.

“I just-”

“I wanted to-”

You laughed at the accident, he smiled in return.

“Go first.” You said, he took a deep breath.

“I don't want to be just your professor. I can't do it, I want you too much to stay away.” He admitted, and for a moment you saw vulnerability on his face, something he didn't show often.

You glanced down at your feet for a moment before your eyes returned to his.

“Good, because I didn't intend for it to be just a one time thing.” You said honestly.

Taking a step forward you let your lips fall onto his once again, gentle, unhurried, taking in the moment.

None other part of you touched, letting your lips do the talking without words.

It took a minute or two before you pulled away.

You looked into his pretty eyes, taking in the blush that rose on his cheeks before finally turning around and unlocking your door with a fingerprint.

Opening them up you turned back around. “Wanna come in?” You grinned.

He moved forward before you could have asked a second time, and in the spasm of laughing and taking off your shoes you randomly reminded yourself about one small detail

“Wait, my panties stayed in your office?”

“Did you hear the rumors?” Angela heard from beside her the moment she took a seat in the lecture hall.

“What rumors?” The girl beside her was known for gossip, and despite not being one to believe in rumors easily Angie was still curious.

“Apparently the hottest professor to ever exist fucked someone yesterday, probably in the bathroom.” Angie looked at her classmate with distrust, she was a very good actor...

“How do you know that?”

“Someone saw from a window that he carried a woman to his car.” She said, excited for some reason.

“Damn, okay.” She was this close to taking out her phone and sending you a text about the rumor, but it had to wait for now.

“Do you understand what it means?” The girl continued, not taking a hint to drop it.

“What does it mean?” Girl shut up already, Angie begged in her head.

“If he fucked one student, then it means we have a chance too!” If eyes could kill, the stupid girl would be already laying underground.

“Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night.” Angela turned around, signaling that she didn't want to continue that conversation and heard how the girl began talking about it with someone else a second later.

As if anyone would want to fuck you... She rolled her eyes at the thought.

In the meantime you and Soraya had a lecture with Rafayel, he was talking about something to do with the renaissance, complaining about too many things concerning that exact topic.

“He what..?” You heard whispers from all around you, glancing at 'Raya who sat beside you sent her a questioning glance which she reciprocated, also with no clue what was going on.

“... Fucked a student...” You overheard, and instantly you knew what this was about.

“No way...”

“Rafayel?”

“Who's the lucky girl?”

“I volunteer to be next!”

You glanced at your friend again, who sent you a smirk, raising her hand to her lips and zipping them with an invisible fly in the air.

You chuckled quietly.

“Yeah, who is it?” She whispered into your ear, making you shake harder while suppressing your giggle.

“One more whisper and I'm going to just leave.” You heard your lover's stern voice, instantly all eyes turned to him. “I'm already using my precious time to come here and teach you, when I could be painting instead, if you want a different professor that badly I can quit anytime, don't worry.”

You knew he would, yesterday he told you that he doesn't care if someone knows that he began a relationship with a student, you were both adults, and he really, really didn't care about this job.

He said he agreed to give lectures only because he was bored, and planned to quit after a year or so, which honestly sounded like him.

A couple people began protesting at the thought of him quitting, after all - many attended this class only because it was him and no one else.

An eye candy instead of a 40 year old misogynistic dude was rare enough, they couldn't let this one go.

“We apologize, professor, we were just talking that your partner must be so lucky to have you.” One girl teased, probably expecting instant dismissal from him at the idea of having someone, but to her and everyone's shock, he didn't drop the topic.

“It's the other way around, I'm the lucky one to have her.” He said like it was a well known fact?

Soraya's mouth dropped, looking at you with a smile that she tried to hide.

He turned around and stopped paying attention to the nosy people, continuing with his lecture.

Now: let's wait until the message will spread that he's taken, it will be funny to watch everyone trying to figure out who the mysterious partner is...

©alexrosa13 on tumblr

taglist @pozuki @animegamerfox

[piggycyberwarrior]

Ekko SWF-Alphabet

₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊

!not proof read!

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Ekko is the type of boyfriend that would constantely pepper your face with kisses. He knows how easily people can die- can be killed- so he tries to shower you with affection.

He likes to show you how much he loves you, because he is kinda confused with words. He is a warrior- a leader, not a big talker? he tries tho.

I would say he is pretty affectionate but mostly behind closed doors. As i said- he's a leader, he shouldn't be smooching his girl next to the firelights... he thinks its inappropriate. But in a calmer, more softer setting- boii he's all over you!!

B = Bribe (Can you bribe him?)

Yes and No.

Ekko is loyal as fuck. He would never EVERR betray the ones dear to his heart. But small and unnecessary things like

"Okay.. would you come with me if i give you one- no TWO kisses?"

Yeah. nope he would immediately jump off the couch and sprint towards you. He doesn't play there..

He kinda sees it as a payment...

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

I PERSONALLY think that Ekko likes Hugs way more than cuddles. I'll explain:

You know that one hug that hits so good? Nose burried in their neck- inhaling their scent- arms tight around the person after you saw them finally- FINALLY again and all these emotions are put in that hug.

^ He loves that so much when he comes home, tired from a mission

That doesn't mean he does not like Cuddles. I think Ekko loves to lay his head onto your Chest/boobies all the time. crushing you under his weight and laughing when you grumble because of his stupid antics

or being the big spoon (like almost never the little spoon- only when he needs comfort). he loves it that he can make you feel safe in his arms

He likes to nap while cuddling but i think he doesn't really like to sleep at NIGHT when cuddling. That! man! needs! his! space!! (Napping while cuddling is okay idk why??)

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Yes he really wants to settle down with you somewhere safe and sound- a place that doesn't exist now, unfortunately. Thats why he works so hard. maybe he can give you that home you deserve someday.

That man is a COOK. Full ass GORDON RAMSAY like its not even normal??? He even enjoys it- apron on, humming a little melody while making breakfast for the two of you.

he loves to help you at home even tho he barely has time between eating , sleeping and his duties. But you don't mind. he asks some of his people to help you out if you really need help with the chores.

is kinda shitty at cleaning- kinda never learned to do it... i mean he grew up in Zaun.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

I'm sorry but like i said he is kinda shitty with words so he tries to rip the bandaid off real quick by breaking up through text/letters...

He doesn't really feel good about it too- feels like an asshole to be honest but he can't help it :(

if they wanted to talk about it though- he tries

he is okay with the fact that you hate him because of his break-up-style

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Ekko is a little bit scared? of commitment. He kinda doesn't wanna be "caged"- he feels as if his freedom has been pushed into a box, but in reality he just needed to find the right person.

I think Ekko needs some time to really REALLY settle with the fact that he loves his s/o and that can take some time.

But oh boi when it happens- he wants to marry you immediately!! Like mentioned he knows that life is short- so he tries to marry you as quick as possible.

But he understands it if you need time to think about it or aren't ready yet.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Ekko's kinda rough around the edges as he grew up in a rough atmosphere. Sometimes his grip is too strong- his attempts to tickle you can hurt a bit and his hands are calloused as well.

But in the end he never wants to hurt you and is extremely gentle towards you as much as he can

he is so much gentler to you than to anyone else. always makes sure you aren't stressed or anything like that.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Yes.Yes.Yes!! he loves hugs like mentioned earlier. It just fits better into his lifestyle as he can quickly but passionately hug you before or after a mission and can also do that in public. he cannot cuddle you outside on the street :/

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Not that fast. Boi has some serious trust issues and you probably have to initiate the big ol' L-Word. When he finally says it- he will never stop saying it.

He willl always shower you with 'I love you's' and expects you to also say it back. he's just a sucker for that simple sentence even tho he was kinda wary of the concept of love

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Doesn't get jealous. Just doesn't, he trusts you completely. Period.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you?)

His kisses are like him. Sweet but passionate, as well as a sprrrinkle of roughness.

he loves the traditional way of kissing you. on the lips. he is addicted to the taste of them on his and can kiss you till dawn. (he doesn't mind that you call him a simp)

He also loves to give you small pecks on your face but mostly the side of your head when you did something cute or stupid.

Always has his hands on you when you kiss- either on your throat, back or waist.

Also grins into kisses like ahhhrgcvszdc PLEASE

L = Little ones (Would he like to have Children?)

Loves children- I mean he keeps them save in the HQ too like what did you expect...

Would also love to have children when he's older.. kinda a dream of his. Probably 3 kids. Is still okay with it if you don‘t like to have kids- respects it!

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

i kind of have the feeling that dis man is such a morning grouch :/ soooorry

like he always wants to sleep more (in other words- has a fucked up sleep schedule)

Still he loves it when you kiss him awake- and he would always and i mean ALWAYS!! roll on top of you and squish you under him with a laugh before pressing kisses on your face and getting up.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

OHH THAT BITCH IS A NIGHT OWL. He is always so much goofier at nighttime (you know that weird 3am energy?? Exactly)

He likes it when you are sitting on his lap at night though, while he is fiddling at some prototype. Your fingers lazily playing with his dreads while he nuzzled himself onto your shoulder while working

Its a mix of both energy’s- late snack runs or slow evenings.

ALSO LOVES TO SLOW DANCE WITH YOU IN THE KITCHEN AT NIGHT!!!!

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

As i said, he takes his time to fully trust you. If you grew up together- he would‘ve probably told you a lot of things already. If you didn‘t- he is kinda hesitant to tell you at first. I think he would start revealing things about himself after a good few months of dating. He takes his time with those things

still he will always listen when you have something to tell him.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

It depends. When he is frustrated- his patience is very thin- but when he is in his normal mood- it’s out of gold

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

REMEMBERS EVERYTHING. It is truly getting creepy. He knows everything???

birthday, likes, dislikes, all the family gossip you told him one day- even remembering all of your family member’s names, favorite book, favorite hyperfixation at the moment, favorite place- everything you mentioned to him once.

lol he laughs everytime you think he forgot something and he proves you wrong- you‘re just like:🧍‍♀️

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

that one hot ass summer night were you were both almost naked (nothing seggsual) - sweating like a pig- window wide open- not able to sleep and just talking bout shit. -> leading to you telling him you love him.

He didn‘t mind the humid heat in the end. Just feeling so happy.

always remembers that moment and feels giddy when there is a hot summer night…

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they like to be protected?)

He loves it when you defend him verbally. He can fight- and doesn‘t want you to hurt yourself in the process- but seeing you argue with someone for him is making his heart race.. <3

like i said he doesn‘t get jealous but is neverthless protective. He knows that Zaun is fucking dangerous- also knows that you can protect yourself but he wants to keep any harm from you..

always being your guard dog and even fighting people that bitch at you.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts?)

I think he always gets you something when he‘s in Piltover- books or small things that you like..

He likes to have dates in the privacy of your home- nothing extraordinary…. I am SO SORRY BUT THIS MAN ISN‘T A FAN OF ANNIVERSARIES!! He just doesn‘t get the point?? For him everyday is an anniversary.

He still plans the home dates (puts a lot of effort in the planning part)- and everytime you do something new fun!!

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Nail Biting, Workaholic, Insomnia, such a gossip girl 😭 its funny tho.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

That Man is proud!!! He worked so much, trained so much did everything to become the person he is- loves his muscles and is kinda concerned how he looks

(Have you seen that man? Face paint on the spot- dreads styled like that and always revealing that yummy bicep..)

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

yes- next question

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

100% a cat person. He loves them but will never admit it. When he first saw one as a kid- he begged Benzo to let him adopt it. Still visits it‘s grave. Kinda has a fur allergy but he doesn‘t care 💀

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

hates hates HATES it when his partner is rude or disrespectful for no reason. (Sure, its a different story when you are getting shit on) but he just finds it so bad when you insult someone for no reason (and mean it)

has no problem when you playfully call someone (him) an idiot tho…

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He is a kicker. Like bitch, stop kicking me in the ribs while sleeping 😭. Also wakes up with his head at your feet- turns around a lot. Just an active sleeper here…

you on the other hand get many bruises from his kicking…. I am so sorry

[leahrintarou]

heyyy!!! i've read through most of your writing and i'm legit obsessed. i know it says your not doing requests rn so if you end up doing this in like a year i don't really mind. could you do fwb for a fem!reader with yuji or some other jjk character? sfw or nsfw or suggestive i don't care, but that would be so cute!!

❀ FWB W/ YUJI ITADORI

synopsis: fwb with yuji, but you both catch feelings despite your promise not to. warnings: college au, barely suggestive, fluff, she/her pronouns, yuji being a cutie pie, "you up?" lol, 2.3k word count. an: the fact that this was in my inbox for so long and I've never gotten the chance to write it until now. so it was borderline ACTUALLY written a year later lmao. i hope you enjoy regardless :') my reqs are open now tho.

y/n’s phone buzzed against the nightstand, the glow of the screen breaking through the dim light of her room. she didn’t need to check—it was always him this late.

yuji: you up?

she stared at the message for a moment, lips pressed together in something between a smile and a sigh. these nights had become a pattern, one they never talked about in daylight, but neither of them seemed to want to stop. she typed back with one hand, the other resting lazily against her stomach.

y/n: door’s open.

it was an invitation, but it never felt like one. more like a habit. like breathing. she tossed her phone aside and leaned back against the pillows, the faint hum of the city outside her window mixing with the quiet of her dorm room. she tried to act like it was no big deal—like his visits didn’t make her pulse quicken, like she wasn’t already anticipating the sound of his footsteps in the hallway.

when the door finally creaked open after a few long minutes, she didn’t need to look up to know it was him. the soft shuffle of his sneakers being kicked off, the rustling of his hoodie as he peeled it over his head—familiar sounds that had started to feel like home in a way she wasn’t sure she liked.

“you always leave your door unlocked like that?” his voice was low, rough around the edges, like he’d been out in the cool night air for too long.

y/n glanced over, meeting his gaze. his hair was a little messy, strands falling over his forehead, and there was that easy grin tugging at his lips—the one that made it harder to keep this casual.

“yeah. for you,” she teased, though it came out softer than she intended.

he leaned against the doorway, arms crossed over his chest, eyes dragging over her—bare legs stretched out under the blanket, her oversized shirt slipping just enough to reveal a hint of collarbone. his gaze lingered, but it wasn’t just lust. there was something else. something warmer.

“dangerous habit,” he muttered, but he was already moving toward her, the weight of his steps making the floor creak in that way she’d come to expect.

he sat at the edge of the bed first, like he always did, his thigh brushing against hers through the blanket. his presence was heavy but not suffocating—it was comforting, in that messy, boyish way only yuji could pull off.

“long day?” she asked, her voice quieter now, more familiar.

he nodded, leaning back on his hands, eyes flicking to the ceiling for a moment before settling back on her. “yeah… thought this might help.”

it was honest. it always was with him. that’s what made it hard sometimes.

she shifted closer, the blanket pooling around her waist, their legs barely touching. his eyes dropped to her bare skin, but he didn’t move—not yet. he was waiting, like he always did, for her to close the gap.

her fingers brushed against his, slow, testing. he didn’t pull away. he never did.

“yeah?” she murmured.

his eyes met hers—warm, familiar, but laced with something heavier. “yeah.”

and just like that, the space between them started to disappear.

-----

the next morning came around and y/n was surprised to feel a weight around her waist. she wasn’t expecting it, but she also didn’t mind it. in fact, she craved it. and that feeling alone made her stomach twist with a deep sense of shame.

yuji’s arm was heavy, draped over her like it belonged there, his chest pressed against her back, warm and steady. his breathing was soft, even, still lost in sleep. she could feel his heartbeat against her spine, and for a moment, she let herself sink into it—let herself enjoy the comfort of his presence without overthinking what it meant.

but it was hard not to.

they promised to keep it casual. no strings, no expectations. just late-night texts and fleeting touches when the weight of their lives became too much. it was supposed to be simple. but the moment he stayed that first night—exhausted from his assignments, passing out before he could pull his clothes back on—that simplicity started to unravel.

it kept happening after that. once turned into twice. twice turned into something like a routine. and now, she woke up more often with him here than without.

it scared her. but it also made her feel safe in a way she hadn’t expected.

she shifted slightly under his arm, trying not to wake him, but he stirred anyway. his hand tightened instinctively around her waist, fingers pressing into the curve of her stomach. he let out a low, sleepy groan, face nuzzling into the crook of her neck.

“n/n… it's too early,” he mumbled, voice thick with sleep.

y/n froze for a second, but then she relaxed, forcing a quiet laugh. “you say that every time.”

he grinned against her skin, eyes still closed. “’cause it’s always true.”

his fingers brushed against her bare skin beneath the hem of her shirt—his shirt, she realized with a flush of heat. sometime during the night, she must’ve grabbed it from the pile of clothes he left here. another bad habit. another line blurred.

she shifted to face him, their noses nearly brushing. his eyes finally cracked open, warm and soft in the early light. there was no teasing smirk this time, no playful comment. just him, looking at her like he was exactly where he wanted to be.

and that was the problem.

“you gotta get up soon?” he asked, voice quieter now.

she shook her head, trying to ignore the way her heart twisted. “nah… you?”

he hesitated, then shrugged. “not really.”

they stayed like that, neither moving, both pretending this wasn’t more than it was.

but it felt like more. it felt like too much.

her chest tightened with the weight of it, but she swallowed it down. because if she said something—if she admitted that maybe she liked waking up next to him, that maybe she liked him more than she should—it would ruin this. whatever this was.

so, she smiled instead, reaching up to brush his messy hair out of his face. “guess you’re stuck with me a little longer then.”

his grin returned, but it was softer this time. “good. i like being stuck with you.”

y/n was used to yuji’s honesty, especially when it came to him expressing his feelings in friendships, but for some reason, she felt like this was different. y/n blamed her exhaustion, blurry brain, and lack of caffeine for these thoughts. yuji was always friendly to pretty much everyone so why would she be an exception? "y/n." yuji's voice sounded as if it faded in and when she looked at his expression of confusion, she realized that he had probably called her name more than once.

"sorry i spaced out."

"i can see that." he laughed teasingly. "are you done spacing out now?"

"probably not, but what's up?" she questioned. yuji was quiet for a moment. very out of the ordinary. there was a nervous smile on his lips and y/n’s anxiety only heightened at his unusual behavior. "i was contemplating last night and i came over here to you to finally make a decision..." he started. y/n could hear her own heartbeat and she hoped that it wasn't loud enough for yuji to hear too. what excuse could she use to give reasoning behind her fast pacing heartbeat?

"which was?" she asked, voice just above a whisper. "i think we should call this whole friends with benefits thing off. not because of you or anything. i just made a shitty mistake that i can't undo no matter how hard i try."

y/n was silent and it felt piercing. what could his reasoning be? what if he caught onto her recent behavior when it came to her interactions with him? extended eye contact, those poor excuses to create physical contact, or even the need to speak to him about anything and everything. he probably reassured her and took the blame to soften the blow of this sudden conversation.

"do you mind telling me what that mistake was?"

yuji sat up, the blanket falling from his body and revealing his bare half. y/n took a glance at him before her eyes darted back up to his eyes. yuji turned away, embarrassment all over his features. "I'd put a shirt on...but.." he smiled nodding towards the shirt that y/n was currently wearing. she would've given it to him in a heartbeat if it weren't for the fact that she wore nothing underneath. "no it's fine. I'm sorry. i can go change into my own and give it back-"

"no, no. seriously its fine. i like when you wear my clothes." he smiled. his words came out with that familiar teasing sounding tone and y/n felt a wave of butterflies in her stomach. "but to answer your question, i kinda sorta broke our no strings attached rule."

y/n felt as if her ears were playing tricks on her but when’s yuji continued, she couldn't deny what was being spoken right in front of her. "i definitely have some strings attached. i know it's sudden and we both agreed to not let it happen but you know..."

y/n’s heart raced as yuji’s words lingered in the air, and for a moment, the room was filled with a heavy silence. she could see the nervousness creeping into his eyes, the way he shifted slightly, as if unsure of himself.

she had always been able to read him, but this time, something was different. something was off. yuji’s usual confidence seemed to be faltering, and it made her hesitate. she wanted to say something, anything, but the words wouldn’t come.

“y/n?” he said quietly, voice tinged with uncertainty. his gaze dropped to her lips, then quickly shifted away. “i know this is sudden, and i’m probably messing things up. i get it if you don’t feel the same, but...”

y/n’s breath caught in her throat as she processed his words. did he really think she didn’t feel the same? wasn’t it obvious by now? all the lingering touches, the way her heart fluttered when he was near. but still, a part of her hesitated. did he really want this? or was this just another one of those moments where they both pretended to be okay with the casual thing, despite everything?

she shifted slightly, her body inching closer to him. the tension between them thickened. yuji’s eyes flicked back to hers, and there it was again—self-doubt. he thought she didn’t want him back.

she wanted to kiss him. her body screamed for it. but her mind was still tangled in confusion, in fear of ruining the fragile space they had created. she stayed frozen, her lips parted slightly as she debated whether or not to make the first move.

yuji noticed. he must've seen it in her eyes—the hesitation, the uncertainty—and his face softened with a hint of frustration, but also something deeper. something vulnerable.

“y/n...” he whispered, his voice barely above a breath. he reached out, gently cupping her chin to bring her face closer to his. “i told you... i like you. not just as a friend. i’ve liked you for a while now. i wouldn’t have stayed over... i wouldn’t have kept coming back if it was just some casual thing for me.”

her heart skipped a beat. the words he had said, so simple and clear, finally broke through her hesitation. he liked her back. she had been afraid—afraid to be too obvious, afraid to let him see the depth of what she felt. but now, hearing him say it, hearing the sincerity in his voice, it was impossible to deny.

without thinking, y/n leaned in, closing the small gap between them. her lips brushed against his softly at first, testing, as if still unsure. but then yuji’s hand slid to the back of her neck, pulling her closer, deepening the kiss.

it was urgent but soft, and it quickly deepened, growing more desperate with every passing second. his hands found their way to her waist, pulling her closer, his body pressing against hers as if he couldn’t get enough of her.

y/n’s breath caught in her throat as she kissed him back, a mix of emotions flooding her—relief, desire, something warmer she hadn’t expected. the kiss was messy, full of unspoken words, and every time she felt him pull away for a breath, he came right back to her, as if there was no place else he wanted to be.

yuji moaned into their kiss, feeling as though it was the first and last time he'd ever get to experience something so exhilarating. she pulled back and yuji practically chased after her lips for a small peck. his eyes found her own and y/n slightly tilted her head to the side.

y/n smiled softly, her fingers tracing the outline of his jaw as she looked into his eyes, now filled with the same longing she felt. “you’re not messing this up, yuji," she whispered, her voice a little shaky but filled with certainty. "you were never just some casual thing to me."

yuji’s smile returned, but it was softer, more vulnerable this time. “so... we’re not just friends with benefits anymore, then?”

“no,” she murmured, her lips curling into a small, genuine smile. “not anymore.”

his grin widened at that, a playful spark dancing in his eyes. “good,” he said, leaning in for another kiss, this one slower, but no less filled with all the things they hadn’t said yet.

and this time, y/n didn’t hesitate. she let herself get lost in it. especially when his warm hand snaked underneath her his shirt.

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