#more at the audacity of the statement than anything else...

[voiceofsword]

Don't ask an enstarrie about their otp worst mistake of your life

The main story. Ouuuugh. Tatsumi just casually complimenting Mayoi or initiating affection.

Tatsumi saying "I think it's a waste you always hide your beautiful face, Mayoi." like the first time these two had a one on one conversation... okay man

Also the main story showing that they both help each other!! Physically and emotionally!!! Tatsumi helped Mayoi when he got sick from being in public and trying to help him with his deprecating thoughts. Tatsumi confides in Mayoi about what happened at reimei before the others and Mayoi carried him when he was tired or in pain. Mayoi says he wants to see the human and dark side of Tatsumi. I'm adding the quote it's so good.

"I hope I will always be the one who understands and accepts him. Including his faults, his dark side – his everything."

SS... screams. The fucking. Line. "Haha. It's okay, Mayoi. You are like a great mother to these kids. Meanwhile, you're also an irreplaceable partner to me." Followed by Mayoi saying "I'm not a mother or a wife, please?!" They're soooo ♡ it's a bit of a debate to alkaloidPs on whether alkaloid should be called a found family and although I'm kind of in the middle I will admit these little interactions are cute. Tatsumi casually assigning Mayoi as a mom friend and him as the dad. Real smooth of you. Side note: I think Tatsumi gets to see another side of Mayoi because later on in the story Tatsumi points out a growth in Mayoi's character and tells him to quiet down after he freaks out about it and Mayoi retaliates by telling him he's the reason he made any noise in the first place. I don't think they'd bicker that much honestly but ♡♡♡ pouty Mayoi could you imagine. Only Tatsumi gets to see it though booooo. There's no lines that really stand out but also Mayoi (+ the juniors) do notice when Tatsumi's health is declining further on in the story. The juniors are more subtle but Mayoi asks when they're on stage. Teehee

They never really get big moments so the rest of what I have are just small little funnier pieces of dialogue... sobs. I'm gonna follow this ask up with one more story though... hehe

THATS SO SWEET... i do remember some of this from main story (especially mayoi carrying tatsumi on his back when his leg pain started to act up again)

its always so ww lovely (lol) when charas constantly go out of their way to help, uplift each other. especially when they make it a point to nurture both their perceived good and bad sides, they can appreciate everything about the other person and feel safe with them regardless 🥺

always being alert for when the other is down so they can pick them up... its one of the reasons i think they mesh well, on account of tatsumi (chronically ill) and mayoi (mayoi) being two people who've both struggled with their health for various reasons, that they can have someone they can openly rely on and eventually not feel like a burden, but that doesnt necessarily mean they will treat each other like glass (i think early on this is more the case but as time advances i can only hope they grow more confident with each other..? pleading emoji again)

but also the. that line kind of just took me out. suethdtgushwergu its so silly. i think while tatsumi is probably completely genuine in some of the things he says that fluster mayoi itd be even funnier to consider him saying stuff like that to fluster him on purpose, considering mayoi makes such a big deal out of it. not to laugh or anything, but because he thinks its cute. arghhghh. holy man who is a little cheeky and little creature who tries his best not to melt in his light. tatsumi seems to be a man that has a lot of affection to give while mayois completely foreign to the concept.

putting this under a read more because it doesnt really pertain to ttmy but more a comment on the found family debate u mentioned, but along the vein of the ss comment

(i personally do think alkaloid could be kind of a found family, but i understand some people's wariness towards it since a lot of the time it just forces the characters into nuclear roles — it's rly easy to forget ur friends can be your family too :').

ofc that line leaves little to the imagination as to what tatsumi means but i think in This Case implying he's the 'dad' of alkaloid is telling of himself for Obbligato Reasons™. putting them in what he considers to be traditional roles and choosing himself as the father figure of the group shows that hes someone who subconsciously takes charge and 'bears the burdens' of the rest of alkaloid. this is ofc not me trying to say that should be the case, fictional or not, but judging by tatsumis past behavior it just makes sense to me that this is a thought pattern he would pick up.

but its also killing me that he cant find another way to express his appreciation towards mayoi than being like You are like the mother to my children. asjhkdsdkjhfkj. can somebody teach this man how to flirt normally!!

that being said, theyre all like.. almost the same age so the assertion is rly funny to me, i love tatsumis old man roleplaying sometimes. i truly do think in his head that he thinks this family dynamic is 100% real. the other 3? not so much)

[cherryswisherz]

it's been awhile

aubrey x reader

warnings: smut, aubreys strap game on 10, swearing

"i'ma ned you deeper than six, it's not a coffin"

sex with me (rihanna, 2006)

-

"aubrey, you've lost your rabbit ass mind if you think that is going inside of me."

laying in our bed, fully ready to have hot, sweaty, sex with my hot, sweaty, sexy girlfriend, i was thrown off when she pulled away from our kiss to ask me a question. 

"you still want the strap baby?"

do i want the straaaaap????

the fuck kinda question is that??

"yes, please." i nodded my head. 

the smile that grew on her perfect fucking face was doing things to me as usual, but when i saw her walk into that closet in nothing but her briefs?

BAM! pussy flooded.

but as i waited for her to get what she needed, my mind started running. 

i haven't had anything but fingers since junior year of highschool.... im a senior in college.

how much do i need to prepare myself?

is she just gonna go for it or is she gonna make this easier for me?

but when i saw her walk out of that closet with the harness around her waist and the length of the strap the only thought i could form is... 

HO IS U COO????

which brings us to my first statement. 

"aubrey, you've lost your rabbit ass mind if you think that is going inside of me."

and this girl had the AUDACITY to giggle as my frustration. "you talk allat shit but can't take dick?" 

"its been awhile bro, that shit's gonna hurt." i said sitting up on my elbows and fully looking at the length of her..... enhancement. 

its big. not ridiculously big, but big enough to make me question why the fuck was i the one that suggested we do this.

suddenly, aubreys long-legged ass is stalking towards me and laying besides me, strapless. 

when the fuck did she take it off?

her hands move a curl from my face, and her dark brown eyes lock with my even darker brown eyes. 

"you really think i'd hurt you?" she spoke so softly, i remembered who i'm dating. 

" i know you wouldn't."

"so why you scared?"

"i'm not scared... more nervous."

her soft lips meet mine for a second before she says "i got you." 

and all i could do was nod because i knew she was telling the truth. 

but she didn't get up. 

she kissed me. deeply. slipping her tongue into my mouth and slipping her hand down the front of my body, leaving a trail of pure heat on her wake.

and i was wet, practically dripping as i unconsciously spread my legs for her. i was a mess, and it was honestly embarrassing. 

everyone else knew me as aubrey's loud, smart mouth girlfriend, but when it was just us two? when aubrey and i were all over each other, the only thing i could think about was her mouth on mine, my mouth on hers, my everything on hers.

i must have been moaning too much because aubrey slid two of her fingers past my lips, silencing me as her teeth scraped my nipple. 

but even with my mouth full of her slender digits, i sucked in a gasp when i felt her bare knee slid between my legs, relieve a fraction of the frustration that was building in my core. i dug my nails into her shoulder and tried my hardest not to bite her fingers off. i didn't hesitate to grind into her knee like a bitch in heat, trying to give aid to my aching clit. but it wasn't enough. i needed more. and i had no problem asking for it.

"more.." i whined but my demand was muffled by her fingers so after she removed them, i repeated myself. "more, aubrey-

i was cut off by my own moan when her perfect lips attached to my clit and sucked. my eyes rolled shut as i arched up into her, feeling my legs practically tremble when her tongue started circling my click with the speed that always drove me insane. 

"fuck- yes, right there-" a plethora of loud moans left me when she sucked even harder. "oh my god, right there, please..."

aubrey hummed into me, vibratinf my core and managing to send me further to my peak.

and right when my legs tangled around her shoulders and my nails gripped the sheets for dear fucking life, she pulled away. 

i squeezed the sheets even harder as  panted. "aubrey," i eyed her as she licked her lips. 

"yes, love?" she question as if everything as peaches and fucking cream. 

"i wasn't do- where the fuck are you going?" i asked as she got up from the bed and walked away. but my question was answered as i watched her put the strap back on and climb on top of me. 

i didn't have time to question anything because her lips crashed onto mine and my brain became foggy. 

"if you need to pause, or stop just tell me. okay?" aubrey reassured me. 

this is why i loved this hoe. 

i nodded and she captured my lips in hers again. 

i gasped and squeezed my eyes shut as i felt the tip push into my entrance, and at that moment i instantly understood why she didn't let cum earlier. i was soaked. so wet that i barely felt the friction as she slid into me. and i was so sensitive and desperate for a release that i couldn't even focus on the stinging feeling of being stretched out as she slowly pushed all the way in. 

she was so deep. i felt so full. i don't remember it being like this. i wanted more. no, i needed more. i opened my eyes and met aubreys as she searched my face for and sign that i didn't want to continue. 

i wish the fuck she would stop right now. 

i wrapped my hand around the back of her neck and brought her down for a deep kiss to let her know that i was okay, and i wanted her to keeping going. 

she started slow, letting me get used to the feeling. and trust that when i did, i couldn't get enough. 

i grinded my hips to meet her strokes, even though we were in missionary. and aubrey quickly picked up on the fact that i was ready for the real thing because she untangled one of my legs from her waist and pushed my knee to my chest, hitting a spot that drove me fucking insane. 

my eyes rolled shut as she picked up her pace and began drilling into me, her free hand meeting my clit. touching pieces of me that i forgot existed, digging her nails in my calf, sucking that spot on my neck. 

 as moans and whimpers poured from my lips, i felt like a mad woman. like i had to be going crazy. there was no way it was possible to feel this fucking good. 

it all was becoming too much, too fast. i felt that knot in my stomach grow tighter and all i could to was scream, but when my mouth opened, nothing came out. my legs were trembling and my hand grasped at whatever they could as my back arched off the bed. 

i heard aubrey talking me through it but she sounded like she was underwater. i was on another planet right now, riding my orgasm out. 

i didn't come down until i felt aubrey pulling out of me, saw her tossing the strap to the side, and heard her whispering in my ear. 

"you did so good for me."

i just laughed as i tried to find my breath. 

"we are for sure doing that again."

niyah speaks ahem... heyy yalllll

taglist: @patscorner @riyahatnight @mattslolita @thaatdigitaldiary

[yesimwriting]

Known

A/n i see this as taking place a little after  this , but they're both separate drabbles that can be read on their own :)

Summary: Late night drinking turns into reminiscing between friends. Or, in which you realize that you've always felt safe around Logan.

Warnings/info: age-gap (both characters are of consenting age!!), casual drinking, unnoticed pining, technopath!reader

----

The colors and voices radiating from the TV screen are easier to feel than experience, the electric current buzzing against your skin.

You move to sit up a little straighter, hands pressing into plush cushioning as you adjust. There's a distance to the way you're feeling, as if some odd lightness has managed to wedge itself between you and the world around you.

You lean forward, reaching for the bottle abandoned on the coffee table in front of you. Your fingers press into the glass as you move back into place, the side of your thumb tapping against the neck of the second beer you've finished tonight. A third might be nice, but the darkness around you makes the door feel too far to even think about getting to the kitchen.

There is a bottle of whisky only an arm's length away...it'd be easy to--

"No." The word is flat in its finality.

A soft laugh gives you away immediately. You press a palm against your lips as if that'll take the sound back. Sometimes Logan reads you so well you have to wonder if he has secret psychic abilities he hasn't told anyone about. "I didn't say anything."

He turns his head, lips pressing together in what feels like an attempt to dismiss the amusement behind his eyes. "Didn't have to." Logan's attention shifts back to the glass in his hand. "You're not drinking it."

You shift, turning to better analyze him. There's a stiffness to him that doesn't suit the amount of alcohol in his system. Maybe he's overcompensating for something, like his level of commitment to the stance he's taking. "Okay," the response is warm, cheery.

Logan lets out a breath as he leans forward, angling himself so close his forehead nearly touches yours. He watches you with an openness that's more dizzying than the alcohol in your system. "I mean it."

His proximity is so disorientating you nearly forget that you're meant to respond and not just stare at him.

"Fine," a genuine concession. Nothing else comes to mind, and you can't bring yourself to look away from him. The overwhelming desire to look at him is far from rare, but you're usually better at suppressing it.

You set one of your hands against the space between the two of you. "I'm gonna go get another beer."

He sighs, as if something about the statement has deeply drained him. "You're not."

Your lips part in a mock gasp. "Are you cutting me off?"

The joke seems to ease him, the corner of his mouth pulling itself upwards. "You're drunk."

Please--who gets drunk off of two beers? You narrow your eyes, not sure if you're more offended by the assumption or his hypocrisy. "Am not."

He has the audacity to smile fully. "Then let's keep it that way." The side of his hand moves to rest against the back of your palm. He's--Logan's always so warm. "Don't need to make putting you to bed any harder, princess."

An uneasy warmth begins to crawl its way up your neck. "Y'know you've had twice as much to drink as me, and you're still going."

You press your lips together in an attempt to hide the fact that you're arguing for the sake of it more than out of a desire for more alcohol.

There's a beat of silence as Logan tilts his chin downwards, making the distance between the two of you feel even smaller than it really is. "And when you're my age, you'll get a third beer."

You let yourself openly frown. "You're no fun."

He sighs, attention shifting back to his glass. "Don't pout."

"I'm not," it's a little more directly dishonest than you'd usually be, but the mood seems easy enough for you to get away with it. "I'm just...talking."

Logan watches you for a moment, doubt etched into his expression. "Sure, kid."

You roll your eyes as you shift away, arm stretching forward to place the bottle back on the coffee table. When you lean back, body pressing into the couch, a strangely poignant wave of drowsiness hits you.

The show you had been forcing Logan to watch has been replaced by something bright and loud. The sitcom had been familiar in that slightly off way, the theme song and characters like something out of a recurring childhood dream.

Before your thoughts can snag on the blurriness of your past, you lift a hand. You let your mind give into the draw of the electric current, the two melding until all you have to do to change the channel is flick your wrist. You flick through a few of them before settling on a show you're much more familiar with.

"You're a regular universal remote."

Despite yourself, you smile. The more you've worked on using your powers, the better you've gotten at motor control. Before, sometimes so much as touching something plugged into the wall was enough to make you lose control. "Much cooler than being the person that blew up the toaster."

He laughs once at the memory, the sound low but warm. "Or electrocuting me."

You glare. "I never electrocuted you." It's the truth. Your first few days here had been hectic, the stability you were being offered seemed too good to be true; every instinct in your body begged you to get out before it was too late. But you hadn't hurt anyone.

"But you thought about it." You don't have decent response. When you met Logan, you were running on nothing but adrenaline. "It's okay, I didn't make the best impression."

When the two of you first met, Logan had been...gruff, and maybe defensive in a warranted way, but you can't remember ever not liking him. Maybe that's why you felt more comfortable around him than anyone else, Logan never spoke to you in a way that felt like a facade.

But he doesn't need to know that, so you just shrug. "We're good now, though."

The show cuts to commercial break, an ad for detergent filling the screen. You let yourself relax further into the couch, your head moving to rest against Logan's arm.

"Yeah," he mumbles, "We're good."

You're aware of your blinking, of the weight of your eyelids and the focus needed to pull them back into place. Logan's presence makes it easier to accept the sluggishness and the vulnerability that comes with it. This isn't the first time he's made you feel okay about something like this.

"Logan?" He hums once in acknowledgement. You let out a quiet breath, the words briefly tangling in the back of your throat. "I'm glad you were the one that found me when I was like that."

He's quiet for a moment, and then his hand squeezes yours. "Me, too."

His voice is so quiet it almost feels like an extension of the electricity floating through the air, another thing that's easier to feel than to know. Your eyes fall shut, and you're comfortable enough to let them stay that way.

----

Taglist: @whyausername99

[so-long-soldier-writes]

It's a Cruel Summer, With You

kai parker x reader | requested

summary: kai's never had anyone tell him they love him. he panics when he hears it for the first time.

tags: based on cruel summer by taylor swift, mild enemies to lovers, drinking / alcohol, secret relationship, summer love, love confessions, fear / panic, past trauma affecting relationships, emotional hurt, unrequited love (but not really), break-up, heartbreak, unhappy ending, one teensy edgar allen poe reference

word count: 5k

a/n: anon, i apologize once more for the amount of time this took! i hope you like it, and i hope i did taylor swift justice. 🩷 i also hope it makes sense bc sometimes i feel like my thoughts are just all over the place 😅

You were staring daggers into the back of his head, three days after a drastic turning point in their lives. And he, feeling your eyes upon him, turned to face you and smiled. That enraged you like nothing else; no man had ever had such an audacity with you, to raise the hell that he had and still offer a smile. You looked back down at your drink, still fuming, and still aware of him watching you, and texted your friends about it. One replied with an equal disgust, another sent a funny-to-her joke, and there was no response from the third. 

“Maybe he’s got a sweet spot for you,” she had said.

“Ha.”

A sweet spot that’d make him kill you last, maybe.

You rolled your eyes exhaustedly, but by the time you looked back down, someone had slunk into the booth across from you. You jumped, then rolled your eyes a second time at the realization of who it was.

“Hey cutie.”

“Don’t call me that.”

Kai shrugged, unbothered. He kept eye contact with you in a way that made it hard to look away; his blue eyes seemed to pierce right into your soul. They weren’t bright, like Damon’s, but instead had a touch of darkness in them. Like storm clouds rolling in on a bright, sunny day. They threaten rain, but you’re not sure if the downpour will come today or tomorrow.

Kinda like how he came into Mystic Falls. 

“What do you want?” You bit, after about thirty seconds of staring.

“Are you scared of me?”

“Excuse me?”

“Are you afraid of me?” He repeated, eerily softly. 

“Why would you think that?” Forced bravery is better than none, especially when faced with Kai Parker. 

“There’s a slight tremor in your voice. Only one finger touches the table, as if you’re unable to settle. You struggle to meet my eyes.”

“What are you, a psychologist?”

“I’m a sociopath.”

Shocker. 

“So?”

“I notice things.” He took a sip of your coffee. Reached out across the table, met your eyes, and sipped your drink. Again, the audacity. “I spent a lot of my childhood isolated. I had a lot of little brothers and sisters, and they were all taught to be afraid of me. I know how to read the signs.”

“I’m not afraid of you.”

“That’s what they’d say, too.”

“Well I’m not your siblings, and I’m not putting up an act. I don’t trust you, and I think you’re an ass, but I’m not afraid of you.” Your statement’s bold, but he had struck something fierce in you. A nerve, maybe on purpose, that wasn’t going to let him win this time. 

Kai smiled at that. His gaze dropped to the table, surveying your hands once more. His own pointer finger dragged along the wood. “I like you, Y/N. You’re plucky.”

The words took a moment to register - Kai saying he liked you. Kai didn’t like anyone. 

He got up to leave, causing you to turn towards him, prepared to jump out of the booth if you had to. “Well don’t.”

He cocked his head. “What?”

“I don’t want you to like me. I want nothing to do with you; you said it yourself, you’re a sociopath, and I don’t need that kind of bad energy in my life.”

That seemed to be funny to him, judging by the way he chuckled. “Okay, Y/N.” He put his hands up in surrender. “I won’t like you then.”

And with that, he was gone. 

Of course, he wasn’t gone - gone. Kai was never gone - gone from anything, even when people yelled at him to leave. He would disappear for a couple days, but he always came back. 

And somehow, after your interaction, you’d see him more frequently at the grill, too. He’d never talk to you, but you could feel his gaze. His stone cold blues would linger on you, almost like an animal stalking prey. 

It made you anxious, jittery. But somewhere, secretly, also a bit excited. 

He was dangerous in a way that drew you in. He had this aura about him that intrigued you as much as it scared you. You knew what he had done, and what he was capable of, and yet he still occupied the curious corners of your mind. 

And somehow, he seemed to know that. 

♫

How it happened from there is something you still question. Death glares became stolen glances, became blushing smiles, and by the next time he joined you at your booth, you didn’t try to fight him off. Kai ordered an uncharacteristically pink cocktail to match your own tropical choice. Neither said much as you both drank the rum mixtures down to the ice. You communicated in eye contact, mostly, as if daring the other to speak. Your stubborn personalities that should’ve clashed seemed to meld together instead. An intense staring contest was born. You found yourself entertained in the game, and quickly, enjoying it, too.

The booze soaked your brain as you continued to drink; your thoughts were fuzzy, and whenever you tried to catch them, they’d dissipate like cotton candy dropped in water. When Liv closed the restaurant around midnight, she unknowingly crashed the floodgates that weakly stood between you two. Ten feet out onto the street, you fell into him and he held you up. You laughed in his arms, partly due to your own drunken state, but partly that it’s Kai keeping you on your toes. He held you tight until you found your footing, just for you to crash your lips onto his unsuspecting own. The witch, taken aback but not opposed to it, let you taste him for a moment before kissing back. He pushed you up to the nearest wall, feeling and exploring, before hailing a ride back to your place. 

It had been forever for both of you. The uber driver with a ‘no touching’ rule sobered you up a little, but not enough to make you think twice about it. By the time he laid you down on your sheets, any doubt in your mind had fizzled out. He was a gentle lover, much to your surprise, likely because it was such an unfamiliar feeling to be so intimate with another. The little control you tried to take was met with a laugh, and you understood the signal. You didn’t mind being underneath him, though, nor did you mind him staying the night.

Guilt struck you when you first woke up in his arms, but not enough to barr yourselves from meeting again. The first few times you had to be drinking to convince yourself it was okay, but the more morning-afters you spent together, the less ashamed you started to feel. With time, nights started to feel less like hookups and more like something else. He became something you adored when you had, and craved when you did not. The feelings were mutual, though harder to pull out from the siphon, until you asked him directly, putting both your hearts out for the other to grab.

“What are we?” You asked, head leaning on the vending machine as he fetched himself a post-high gatorade. A bag of cookies were held in your own hand from the exchange you made one minute prior. 

“Having fun,” Kai replied.

“Kai…”

“Or so I think,” he followed his words, questioning the look on your face. 

“Are we anything more? Will we ever be?”

A loud voice down the hall that vaguely resembled his sister made a sharp remark to another person. His response sounded closer, as if they were heading in your direction. Kai grabbed your arm and muttered a simple cloaking spell until they both passed. Liv and Tyler both disappeared into her room, then Kai removed his hand. His touch lingered on your skin for a moment. You’ve grown to quite like the feeling. 

“I don’t know,” he confessed, “I’m not exactly the person for relationships, if you aren’t aware. I’m a sociopath that was locked in complete isolation for eighteen years.”

“I don’t care.” You grabbed his hand and laced your fingers together. “I like you. I don’t want this to stop. I want it to be more.”

“I’m not built for this.”

“But do you want it?”

His mouth went dry as he already knew the truth. He did. He wanted you so much, but fear held him back like a dog on a leash. He didn’t have much slack. “I want you,” he finally said. “I want this to work.”

“I’m not good at relationships, either. We’re figuring this out together.”

Kai seemed to accept that better, and two minutes later, he climbed back under the sheets with you, turning on a movie and sharing snacks until you fell asleep. 

♫

As your relationship progressed, it was tested, like all relationships ever are. You grew closer, more comfortable, as summer went on. Much of your time spent together was at night; you hadn’t told your friends, not ready for their questions nor their judgment, nor did you want the word out to his coven yet, afraid of whatever wrath his father could bring if he were to disapprove. You were still figuring things out, still learning about each other, and testing yourselves through time, and that was okay. Life isn’t something to be learned in a day, it’s something in which to be present to see where it takes you.

So, you let yourselves live, to do just that. On top of rooftops and beside small creeks, you snuck out to enjoy each other’s company. Mystic Falls has a lot of places to hide if you know where to look. 

A couple times, you’ve almost ran into others. More than anyone being Liv and Tyler, also avoiding her father. Once, you’ve ducked under bushes to hide from Bonnie. Kai kissed your neck while his hand was clamped over your mouth, daring you to give away your position, while playfully inhibiting your chance to do so.

Sometimes, you were drunk when you found yourselves venturing the town together. The bar in which neither Matt nor Liv worked became a hotspot for you. But instead of ending the night short, you opted to explore the late hours in each other’s company. The alcohol wore off quickly, but the drunkenness brought on by your unconfessed love never did. 

Kai, as it turns out, was easy to fall in love with. He was charming when you first met, but you were tickled to learn that underneath his manipulation tactics, he could be just as endearing authentically. He was a jokester and a flirt, whether across a room when you’d spot each other in public, or when you were hanging out together alone. You were never afraid to be alone with him. If your friends knew you were out with him, alone, at night, they would’ve freaked, but he always made you feel safe. And, once he felt comfortable being vulnerable with you, he revealed a side that could be sweet, too. 

Even after arguments, you were able to patch things up as if they hadn’t happened. Sometimes, he’d be bristling and volatile, but you knew that a lot of his anger came from a place of fear. You learned what to say that would calm him down; you told him what he needed to hear to feel safe again. You’d provide him with the comfort he’d always desired, and when he settled, he’d melt into your touch and softly request forgiveness.

You complimented each other perfectly. And while it took you a moment to name the emotion, the feeling had been there all along. It was love. 

♫

You were only slightly drunk the first time you realized the truth. Kai was painted in perfect, purple lighting, and his eyes seemed to sparkle when they met yours. You stumbled towards him and put your arms around his neck. He caught you, hands finding your waist. The music seemed to fade out as you swayed with him to the beat. It was as if a bubble captured you both, drowning out the rest of the world, making him your world, and in that moment, nothing else existed. You kissed him quickly, desperately, like an addict gone too long without a hit. He met you halfway, equally addicted. 

And then, because you were young, and stupid, and courageously in love, you blurted out the words swimming restlessly in your mind,

“I love you.”

You looked up at him, not expecting an answer just yet, but to offer an encouraging smile. Before your gaze even reached his, his body tensed. His hands felt like ice upon your nervously warmed skin, and his once-strong grip on your waist loosened. Kai wore an expression of confusion, different from the emotion that you tasted on his lips. You opened your mouth to retract the words, but nothing came out. The bubble that consumed you seemed to crack; the music previously blocked filled your eardrums once again. 

A fraction of a second later, you were guided to a hallway by your fingertips. The narrow path reduced some of the music, but most of the traffic. The man of your affection took to one wall, leaving you in the middle. You tried for his hand after he let it go, but dropped it at the discomfort he seemed to feel in having you hold it. 

You racked your brain for the right words, but nothing seemed perfect. You stared at the ground beneath your feet for a half second longer until he spoke, 

“You can’t do that.”

“What?”

“You know what I mean.”

“I’m sorry? I don’t. What did I do wrong?” He only shook his head, prompting you further. “Was it what I said or when I said it? Because I don’t think it’s wrong of me to confess what I feel for you when I know that it’s true.”

“It can’t be true. You can’t feel that for me.”

“Why not?”

“Because…”

“Provide me with a reason,” you interrupted, “or let me do as I please. I want to love you. I do, and I won’t apologize for it.” 

“Y/N-”

“We’ve had some tough times together, I know we have, but we’ve gotten through them. We - us, together - have worked through so much to get here. Of course I love you, there’s so much effort and, and, love, that connects us.” You paused, letting your thoughts catch up to your mouth. “You don’t have to say it back. You don’t even have to acknowledge it, if you’re not ready. I know it’s a big step.”

“You can’t go there, Y/N.”

“I know, okay, maybe it was too much, too soon. I’m sor-”

“No, you can’t ever go there. You can’t love me and you shouldn’t. I’m not designed for relationships, they’re not meant for me. Do you not remember the things I’ve done?”

“We’ve talked about this, Kai. You confided in me about your fears, but we handled them, I thought. Do you not remember what I said?”

“I do, but-”

“‘Tell me every terrible thing you ever did, and let me love you anyway’.”

“By Poe,” Kai finished.

“And it’s true. I don’t care about the things you’ve done. I want to love you, and I do.”

“But you shouldn’t. You shouldn’t excuse the things I’ve done just because you want to see me for someone who I am not. You shouldn’t be so desperate to see a difference in me that you convince yourself you love me.”

“What?! Kai, I’m not excusing nor am I desperate. I know you’re different from the you that wrought pain upon the town. That guy’s gone, buried, with this you in his place. And I quite like this you, and I’ve learned to love him, because his progress is worth loving. He is worth loving. You are.”

“The old Y/N would never say such things about her sworn enemy. You’d never dare hold his hand, nor kiss his lips, nor say such things, because you’d know better, and if you did, it’d be because of some horrible nightmare, or some instance where I spelled you to get what I needed, because Y/N, we’re living in a fantasy, and none of this is real.”

“I don’t understand! This is real! We’re here, together, and we were dancing, and we were happy, and now we’re in this hallway. Still together, but now questioning if the summer we’ve spent together has all been a hoax, or if that’s the booze talking.”

“I’m not drunk.”

“You have to be, to think what you’re saying is true.” You paused, heartbroken, and afraid to show it, but pretty sure the choke in your words already had. “So are you saying you’ve never meant it? All the times you’ve kissed me were just folly? Or the nights we stayed up until the sun rose again were only dreams I made up?”

“That’s not what I meant, Y/N. I know what we’ve done, and I know we’ve shared moments, but a fantasy is all this is for us. Something we want, but cannot have. We have to wake up some day.”

“I disagree, I think we can make it work.”

“That’s where you’re wrong. This was never supposed to be a long-term thing.”

“But we said it could be! We said it could make it work!”

“And that’s what makes it a fantasy! We both know that’s a lie.”

“Kai, I don’t understand. Ten minutes ago, we were fine. Yesterday, you gave me a kiss that swept me off my feet; that replaced all my organs with butterflies; that made me feel like full-bloomed roses on the nicest day of the year. You made me feel cherished, and happy, and beautiful, but now, I feel like I’m on the end of a well-thought out joke, and everyone’s finally allowed to laugh.”

“I’m not saying this to break your heart. I’m just trying to be realistic.” He reached out to wipe a tear from your cheek, but you smacked his thumb away. 

You couldn’t stop the tears from falling, but you still tried to talk through them. “I thought we were being realistic when we stayed up talking, all those nights, about how we knew each other’s flaws but were willing to work through them anyway. I would think, if we weren’t, we wouldn’t have spent a whole week together and considered getting an apartment to share, because we work just that well.”

“That only proves my point further. We haven’t been together long enough to make big decisions like that.”

“Then we’ll put it on pause and address it later.”

“Y/N-”

“Why are you doing this? Why does it seem like you’re giving up on us? Why are your words sounding like a preface to a break up?”

“Because they are,” he confessed, “because they have to be.”

“What do you mean, ‘they have to be?’”

“We can’t work. You can’t love me.”

“But I do, and I want to, and we do! We’ve managed to make it work, despite our-”

“But how long do you think we can keep this up? When will our differences outweigh our desires to stay together? When will we tell your friends about us? My family? We are too different for us to work, and I’m too damaged to be loved by you. We have to stop living in this fantasy.”

“I can’t believe you’re saying this. Do you even know what you’re saying?”

“I’m not drunk, Y/N.”

“So what, have you been planning this? Have you been waiting for the perfect time? Funny, that the perfect time seems to be when I tell you I l-”

“Don’t,” he interrupted, “don’t say it again.”

“What?”

“The less you say it, the less you’ll believe it.”

“That’s bullshit. I believe it in the deepest corners of my heart. You’re etched into my bones. You’re the shimmer of light in the darkest parts of my mind. I love you, Kai Parker. I love you, and I don’t want to apologize for it, and I won’t believe that I’ve made this all up in my mind. It’s okay that you don’t love me, but don’t you dare try to say you feel nothing.”

“Y/N-”

“‘Tell me all the terrible things you’ve done, and let me love you anyway’.”

“You can’t. I won’t let you.”

“You don’t have a choice. I don’t. I can’t control my heart nor its desires. It wants you; you have it. Tell me you don’t crave it. I know you crave love, Kai. I know it in the way you kiss me, and in the way you hold me. I know it from the time you confessed, at two in the morning when you were too tired to hold back, and I know it from when you told me, clear as day, on that Wednesday afternoon. I love you, and I’m not afraid to love you. Why don’t you give in to what I know you want?!”

Because your love isn’t mine to take. 

Because I don’t deserve it.

Because you’re a gemstone, perfect and pure, and I’m the dirt from which it was pulled.

“Because I don’t feel the same for you,” he said instead, “I’m not capable of love. I’m a sociopath, and anything I’ve ever said was for my own fleeting pleasure. It’s over now. I’m done. I’m bored with us.”

“What? No. Something’s wrong. This is not the same Kai I spent the summer falling in love with. Are you Damon in disguise? Pulling some sick prank?”

“I’m not, Y/N. It’s me, being realistic, and telling you I don’t love you, and I never will. It’s time to go home, Y/N, and to your own bed, in your own sheets.”

The tears streaming down your face run your make-up, but you can’t find it in yourself to care. “But my sheets smell like you.”

“Then wash them.”

The harshness in his tone was unlike anything you’ve ever heard before. When you finally brought yourself to meet his eyes, there was no light inside them, no humanity. His jaw was tensely set, and for the first time in months, you saw the Kai that everyone feared when he had broken himself free of his eighteen-year punishment. Scared and sorrowful, you backed away from him. He didn’t follow. You backed further and further away until you were stumbling out of the bar. The wicked August heat kissed your neck like he used to -  passionately. You grabbed your hair, fumbling it up into a bun to get it off your skin, then searched for your phone to call a ride. 

As the white sedan approached your meeting spot, you trained your blurry vision on the door, but Kai never came out. He never shouted your name, hurried down the steps, nor caught you in an apologetic embrace, blaming his temporary ignorance on too much to drink. He never peered through a fingerprint-stained window, watching you from the glass, wondering if it's too late to take back what was said. It was just silent, as car engines roared and drunk couples chattered around you. 

When your ride finally came, you cried harder than you ever had in your life. Your driver glanced to the backseat, but didn't know a good time to interrupt, so he didn't. He offered a polite smile as you got out, thanked you for the five-star rating, and made sure you got in your apartment safely before pulling back onto the road. 

You barely made it through the door before crashing on the couch. Exhaustion settled in your bones halfway through the drive, and you couldn’t even think about climbing the stairs. The worst headache of your life pounded in your skull. Water was too far of a walk, so you let it throb. 

You tried your best not to think about Kai. His words rang in your head on repeat like an old antique bell - loud, heavy, constant. It almost felt like the whole night was a fluke. A nightmare. A spell, perhaps done by his father, or one of your disappointed friends. When you wake up, he’d be there, kissing your fingertips as the smell of coffee fills the air. You let this thought comfort you, and let it soften your heart. Although, deep down, you knew the truth. 

He wouldn’t be there. He didn’t want you. 

You’ve never known pain like this before.

♫

You can only ignore your friends for so long. Blaming a long to-do list can only give you so many excuses, and when Caroline messages you mid-afternoon on a Friday if you’d meet them at the Scull Bar, you realize you don’t have any more excuses left. So, cautiously, you pull yourself from your bed and drag your feet to your closet. You still haven’t washed your sheets, despite wanting to be rid of his once-comforting smell. It’s more stubbornness than anything, refusing to do the chore. If he thinks throwing a piece of fabric in the wash will rid you of him, he’s a damn fool.

You hadn’t been lying. He owns a part of your heart, and that can’t be simply washed away with some eco-friendly detergent.

Truthfully, you think, ignoring the heaviness in your bones as you enter the Scull Bar, the only way to remove him would be to carve out your heart entirely; to separate it from its lifeline and from all that’s familiar. But, you can’t, so you choose to let it bleed instead, and hope it doesn’t seep through your clothes. 

A vague sadness hangs above your heads, but none of your friends know the cause. You told them you were tired before joining them. You must not have gotten a good night’s sleep.

After all, it’s the first time in Mystic Falls where something tragic isn’t happening. Damon and Elena are planning out their lives, Stefan and Caroline are newly together, and Bonnie and Enzo, a quite unexpected pair, seem to be happy. Jo is five months pregnant, and Kai has left her alone. The girls wonder if that’s of his own volition, or if someone or something is distracting him, but you don’t offer any suggestions. When they then ask you about your own dating life, you only shrug. They tease playfully, having no idea about the wreckage your heart is still trying to piece back together. The cause seems hopeless. You don’t even have the energy to confide in them. 

The topic finally changes, but only because the one who dropped your glass heart enters. You turn when you catch a bit of his familiar cologne, but remind yourself he’s no longer yours and turn again just as fast. The girls let their gazes linger on him as if daring him to bother them, and for a moment, Kai wonders if you told them. But then, as they shrug and go back to their conversation, he knows you didn’t. Otherwise, they’d be hurling bitter words and sharp tools at him for breaking their best friend’s heart. 

And honestly, he wishes they were. 

It’s what he deserves, after all. 

♫

“I love you,” you had said, only a couple weeks ago. 

His heart stopped. His throat went dry. 

The words seemed to have been shouted at him, despite the booming bass around them. You weren’t yelling, though, you were simply telling the truth. 

A truth he wasn’t ready to hear. A confession he didn’t know how to process. 

How could you, a perfect person, love him, someone so tainted and dark? 

How could he ever love you the way you deserved? 

He did love you, of course. He knew it long before you ever confessed, but it was never something he felt okay to share. 

You always made him feel safe. Comfortable. Dare he say it, loved. 

But love was something he had never felt before, and to have something means that it can be lost. And to not lose it tragically, he must be the one to take it away. 

Hearing the words fall from your lips was both the best and the worst thing he could ever hear. He craves love, he knows he’s admitted it. He craves it more than anything else in the world. But wanting it and having it are two very different things, and now that he has it, he regrets asking for it. 

He had to hurt you then, before your soul could be completely shattered later. He had to stop it. Right then. Before he let you in too much and you got too attached.

So, he lied. 

He broke his own heart with every word, but it was nothing compared to the damage he knew it was doing to your own. He wanted nothing more than to sweep you into his arms, hold you tightly, and say it was all just a spell - an outside force trying to drive you apart - but he couldn’t. His fear of hurting you triumphed over his love for you. His mouth spoke before his mind could process the words he professed. He became unrecognizable to himself by the time he delivered his final blow. Your tears stained your perfect face and your posture was defeated, but he was no longer the one that could offer any solace. He was now the one that ruined you, and there was no coming back from what he had done. 

How terrifying it is, that three little words can make or break you. 

How terrifying it was, to wake up the next morning and realize the damage caused. To have to come to terms with the fact that he had broken the only good thing in his life. To imagine the love of his life sitting on the couch, stirring coffee, with a head full of questions neither will ever be able to answer. 

“I love you, Kai Parker. I love you, and I don’t want to apologize for it…”

“I love you,” ain’t that the worst thing you’ve ever heard?

[urcrowley]

Floral Flame

— Florist!Touya X Reader —

(NO QUIRKS AU , I NEED TO HEAL 🤚🤚🤚)

YOGiNotes: I can’t believe I’m writing this but here we are!! We need more male reader fics guys.. I feel left out /j

(EVERYONE LITERALLY DRAGGED ME TO THE DABI BRAINROT!1!1! STOP THIS MADNESSSSSS)

Completely made this in a rush and out of boredom! I apologize for any spelling and/or grammar mistakes. It is a bit short for my liking but I do hope you still enjoy! 🙏

Warnings: some swearing ig (?) ; very unfunny author ; angst will cook soon (not in this chapter though….)

“My flower…”

Y/N muttered to himself, staring at the now-wilted flower. With a gentle touch, he reached out and tapped one of the fragile petals, watching as it detached from the wilting bloom and fell to the ground.

“I should probably ask that old hag for some advice again, huh?”

He was talking about the older yet amicable woman who ran the flower shop just a few blocks away from his apartment. He regretted not remembering her name. With a less-than-careful tug, Y/N detached his backpack from the corner where it had been gathering dust and carelessly dumped its contents onto the bed, each item making a soft thump sound as it hit the mattress. Y/N cautiously placed the flower pot into his bag once everything was out and grabbed a random coat from the rack beside the door. As he walked out, he tried to tie his shoes while keeping up with his pace.

Almost causing himself to fall.

Well, almost.

He strolled over to his locked bicycle, hopping on it shortly. He rode his bicycle to the shop. But when he arrived..

He was not greeted to the usual ‘good day’ of the kind old woman; rather, a man who didn’t look too far off his own age.

‘This guy definitely listens to mcr..’

Y/N thought to himself, as he waved at the guy. Putting up a front, smiling politely.

“Excuse me? Do you know where—“

“She’s not here today.”

…okay, rude?

“Oh.. When will she—“

“Next week.”

This guy was getting on Y/N’s nerves if he was being completely honest.

“Who are you anyways?”

Y/N was only met with silence and a cold blank stare. He stared back because— well, to be Frank, he didn’t know what else to do.

“I work here.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.”

He could hear the man click his tongue in annoyance.

“I don’t have to answer to you,” he rolled his eyes, “now, do you need help with anything or something?”

“Is that how you usually treat your customers?”

“…yeah? So what?”

“Nothing, just saying it’s a big.. contrast to what I’m used to.”

The man's gaze fixed on Y/N with a steely glare, his eyes narrowing as if affronted by Y/N's audacity to utter such a statement. “Whatever.. just tell me what you need so we can be done here.”

“Right.. so um..”

Y/N withdrew the flower from his backpack and gingerly placed it on the counter of the checkout. He then glanced up at the man, a sheepish smile playing on his lips.

“I don’t know what went wrong.. I did what I was told and kept managing my watering time..”

Dabi, as indicated by his nametag, meticulously examined the flower, leaning closer to get a better look. It was clear the flower was already dead, leaving him to ponder Y/N's actions beforehand. Y/N, however, contemplated if Dabi was thinking something profound like 'this plant hadn't received the precise amount of water it required,' or if it was something stupid simple and meaningless like ‘I wonder what I’ll have for dinner later.’

Jokes on him, Dabi was thinking of both.

Dabi let out a sigh and rolled up his sleeves, revealing the tattoos on his arms. Y/N was tempted to take a peek, but quickly reminded himself not to be nosy. However, despite his best efforts to focus, he couldn't help but sneak a quick glance at the intricate ink designs on Dabi's skin.

‘Shittt.. that’s sick.’

Y/N thought before quickly snapping out of it.

“Did you make sure your flower gets enough sunlight every day?”

“…what?”

“Your flower?? Gets sunlight?? Hello??”

“……”

Dabi slowly shifted his gaze towards Y/N, his face betraying a mixture of disbelief and surprise. His expression seemed to convey a silent question, as if wondering what on earth Y/N was even doing to this poor plant.

“Are you fucking with me right now?”

“…no.”

The two stared at each other…

After a moment of silence, Y/N spoke up again. “How was I supposed to know this flower needed sunlight?”

“Google exists.”

“I’m a busy man!”

“Busy doing what? Being uneducated?”

DAMN, that hurt more that it was supposed to.

“Okay.. okay, it’s a dumb mistake on my part. Can I buy another one to try again?” Y/N puts his hands on his hips, waiting for Dabi’s answer. “Well.. I don’t have a choice I guess.” Dabi said, the sound of defeat evident in his tone. He walked away to find the same flower as Y/N stood there.

Y/N found himself strangely familiar with the odd man before him. There was something about him that he couldn't quite pinpoint, and it frustrated him. Crossing his arms in annoyance, Y/N observed Dabi carefully examining the flower selection. He realized maybe he should cut the newbie some slack since he just started working here after all.

Dabi finally located the specific flower Y/N had requested and assisted in transferring it to a fresh pot. He then helped Y/N carefully tuck the potted flower into the latter's backpack, gently securing it in place.

“Thanks, I appreciated the help.”

“Ugh, please never come back.”

Y/N snorted at that, almost unable to hold his laughter. He handed his payment to Dabi, and waved goodbye.

“Unfortunately for you, new guy, I’m a regular here!”

He said as he walked out of the store.

Dabi— no, Touya exhaled a frustrated sigh once that idiot guy was gone. He hated working at the flower shop but knew he had no choice. His current situation forced him to hide, and this job was a means to keep a low profile. He longed for a better life, but for now, he was stuck here in this cramped shop, surrounded by fragrant blooms.

Welp, that’s the life of a man on the run he supposed..

YEEEE HE HAS EDGY BACKSTORY WOAHH 🫵🫵😮😮😮😮

This chapter is just me trying to get the idea out of my head, I swear I’ll cook better in the next one ☹️☹️☹️💥💥💥💥

This was supposed to be an artwork idea but I couldn’t really draw rn

Also, mind you, I’m posting this at 3AM in my timezone, PLEASE PLEASE EXCUSE THE BADWRITIGNNFNF 😭😭😭😭

(I am ashamed of myself 😞)

[kisaxiii]

Laudna’s “I already apologized for that” enraged me so much because no, actually, she didn’t. She never once said “I’m sorry for hurting you” what she said was “I didn’t mean to” and there are key differences there

1. She never acknowledged with her own words that she attacked and did damage to Orym while he, and everyone else, was ASLEEP and DEFENSELESS.

2. “I didn’t mean to” is not an apology, the word “sorry” or “apologize” are not included in that statement. “I didn’t mean to” by itself is an excuse, not an apology.

3. Even if “I’m sorry” came before or after “I didn’t mean to” that’s still not a real apology, because the very nature of throwing that “I didn’t mean to” in there is to garner sympathy for yourself, relieving yourself of at least partial blame, and if anything, apologizing more for being caught than for attacking a sleeping member of your party.

From the moment everyone else woke up Laudna spent the rest of the episode trying to deflect, garner sympathy for herself, and put blame on Orym.

Her argument for why she ATTACKED a SLEEPING member of the party changed every time someone rationally stated why her excuses weren’t entirely valid.

She also continued to ignore and downplay Oryms own experiences with the sword, as though his and everyone else’s experiences weren’t as significant as hers. Yes, she died by that blade, but so have almost everyone else in the party, and so did Orym’s family. Except they didn’t get revived. And while this isn’t a contest, Laudna isn’t the only one who deserves to decide what is done with the blade. Orym should have maybe talked with the rest of the group first, sure, but Laudna is acting like she is the only one who deserves to decide what to do with it and she simply is not. If ANYTHING, I feel like this outburst means she shouldn’t be included/involved with the decision at all.

Yes, I understand that all of this is because of Delilah in her head, but Delilah only made the initial suggestion. The attack, the fight, the multiple attempts to steal the sword and run, the outlashes, the things she said, all of that, was Laudna. Not Delilah. Matt even said as much after she rolled for it. It was her decision to act like she did, and do the things she did.

And after all that, for her to have the audacity to not only claim she has never lied to Imogen, but also to claim she apologized? Absolutely not. There was nothing even remotely close to an apology in anything she said, because Laudna doesn’t think she did anything wrong. Even after being told by everyone she was.

[smilingangel582]

Weeeeheeee uuuuu guyyys beeeen waiting tooooo loonng.

This will be my first ever daaadaaadaaa will you doo the fandangoooo!

Ahh yes scara -oopse who's thT? I mean wanderer and I named him "Yuki" cute neh.

Ne, ne... in case you guys want to ask me things pls ask kk Away

Tragically however I'm clumsy and by accident I deleted some asks and I want you to forgive me of I have forgotten u....I'm a little busy and I didn't have time to think straight sooooo I made time for u this timeeee meeee trying kkk?

Genshin impact will soon launch version 3.8, and I'm excited because after that, the wanderer banner is coming....finally, u can pull for that bratty puppet! Called the wanderer Yuki, so if you are confused, I named him Yuki OK.

Enjoyyyy, no spoilers, cuz it's a game... but still, u can play it before reading! I love iiiim

Weakness of the former all mighty God

It was an understament to say Yuki hated the traveller. Yet he finds his ability to smile every situation and be laid back is puzzling.

The wanderer was the name he went by. He gave up his past and became a free spirit. He was seeing new sides of the world. He hated people, but now it's more of an antisocial trait than wishing annihilation on the human race.

Yuki, the name was appealing to him. The traveller even went so far as to share his own name with him, and he didn't mind. But naming him, Yuki felt somehow warm despite it meant snow.

"Oiii Yukii dont get lost in the traveler's teapot alright?" Paimon's voice clammered, and he looked up with an eye roll "your too loud,"

"And you're too slow for someone so fast"

The traveller laughed at the petty dispute between them. He had his golden eyes on Yuki, making him feel conscious as they began leisurely moving around the large space of the new world he was in.

"You're quiet today... something wrong?

Yuki noticed Aether's concern. He looked away with a sigh "Yeah just thinking... it was not too long ago. I wanted to kill you, and now you looked like you could die for me"

He expected a denial of that statement but surprisingly Aether gave a sheepish laugh "I know, it had been so long"

"W...what?" He blinked twice, unable to apprehend this sudden sensation of warmth.

Paimon and Aether exchanged happy smiles. "Come on..." it was his flying companion."We're friends... we smile and laugh like anyone else. You don't need to be so stiff"

Yuki's smile didn't reach him, he smirked sure... but a smile? Is it different from what he expressed before?

Before he could say anything more. He felt a poke in the side from Aether. He had a mischievous grin "Careeeful Yukii~ let your guard down like that, your friends will expose a weakness from you" then brightly perking up and wiggling his fingers he giggled "And that's what friends are for so take that!"

Tackling the wanderer in their own teapot, where the grass touched him, he was shocked when the traveller began to dig his fingers to his ribs.

"What in the world -gah!! Wahahit whahat ihihis thahaht?"

He felt a spread of electric waves from his sides, like the traveller was using electric powers, but not it was just his blunt fingers.

Paimon snickered absurdly. "You seriously haven't been tickled before? All the more reason that it is fun!"

Tickled? Not a word he knew, but it didn't hurt. He just felt it funny and the urge to let out laughter. It was certainly humiliating.

"Haah?? Thihihis ihihis weheheheird stahahahap ihit!" Yuki squirmed under the blond, who also laughed in thrill at the sight of blushing wanderer. Paimon sneaked in a few prods to his toes that were poking out from his sandals.

"Isn't this fun, though?" Aether said softly, now pinching his lower ribs."Aren't you relaxed?"

The lower ribs were bad, and Yuki cackled now. "Gaaaah! Wahahahahait wait wait wait! Thehehereee! Ihihitd bahahahahad! Whahahat are yohou dohohoiing!!!??? Cuhuhuhut it outttt Aetheheher!"

Laughing at the sudden burst of laughter Paimon had the audacity to take pictures of them from the Kamera.

"Gehet her away from thahat! Nohoho stahahap!" He giggled sweetly when he covered his face. Smirking, he drilled his fingers under his arms through the cloak, and that made him lower his arms.

"So cute..." Aether murmured and then he stopped for a while "That's called tickling,"

"Tehehe... whahat a funnehehey wohord..." he breathed giggles, now settling to a calmer mood."Why did I laugh thoho?"

To emphasised he poked his ribs making him squeal adorably "This touch, its something humans have but I didn't expect a puppet like you to be ticklish....its adorable"

"Wait... ticklish... tickled... so many words tho..."

"It's both a verb, a noun and an adverb of it silly..." Paimon said poking his ears now.

"Gaah enough," he pulled away from the teasing and blushed furiously. "Mark my words, and I will get my revenge tenfold!

"And I'll just tickle you again," he began to chase Yuki, who had failed to make his threat more real. He thought as he escaped the evil clutches of the traveller...

I will certainly get him back for sure!

[666writingcafe]

You Are So Lucky

Leviathan

Some time ago--I don't know when, since I've been too focused on making these costumes to glance at a clock--MC poked their head in my room to ask if I wanted to go out to eat with them and the brothers. Not wanting to stop, I told them no, but asked that they bring something home for me to eat later.

The sound of my phone buzzing interrupts my concentration, and I mutter angrily as I check to see who had the audacity to call me. Any irritation I feel melts away when I see MC's name on my screen.

"Is everything alright?" I ask when I answer the call.

"No." MC's voice is faint, as if they're trying to keep this conversation a secret. "Just listen."

"I told you, I want to order another special Babel parfait!" Great. Beel's throwing a tantrum at the restaurant that they're at. "What about that do you not understand?! I already ate the one you brought earlier, and now I want another!"

"But sir--" I feel bad for the waiter. There's no explaining anything to Beel once he's angry.

"So what if I just ate a parfait that's meant to take four people an entire hour? So what if I did it in 15 minutes? Is there something wrong with that?!"

"We only have so many ingredients, and it's a seasonal item--"

"How is that my problem?! I'm hungry! I'm hungry, I'm hungry, I'm hungry!"

"That idiot..." Whatever else Lucifer says is drowned out by a bunch of voices yelling at each other.

"Why am I listening to this?" I ask.

"Evidence," MC answers quietly, frustration evident in their voice.

"For what?" Before MC can reply, Mammon yells for people to duck as plates begin breaking.

"This is really getting out of hand." Then why aren't you doing anything to stop it, Asmo? You have the ability to charm people into doing whatever you want, after all!

"Honestly, it's high time Beel learned some patience, which is why--" Silence. Did the line go dead as Satan was talking?

"A plate of pancakes hit Satan in the face," MC commentates softly.

"Oh shit," I respond. This can't be good.

"You! How dare you throw something at me!"

"Satan, calm down." Are you dumb, Lucifer?! You never tell an angry person to calm down, especially if they're the Avatar of Wrath!

"Shut the hell up!"

"What did you say?"

"I'm sick of you and your older brother act!"

"Well, I am your older brother, after all." Lucifer pauses. "Although, in your case, I guess I'm something even greater than that?" He did not just go there.

"And if you're going to criticize me, what about you?" I guess Lucifer wasn't done berating Satan yet. "Do you have to be defiant and hostile all the fucking time? Are you capable of behaving in any other way?"

"Do you need me to come get you?" I ask MC.

"Not yet," they whisper. "Just stay on the line."

"This is all Mammon's fault." Belphie's being unreasonable. I may not like Mammon a whole lot, but even I can acknowledge that he's innocent this time.

"What?! Why?! I didn't even do anything!" You tell them, Mammon!

"If you hadn't dodged that plate when it flew at Satan, it wouldn't have hit him in the face to begin with!" I actually face-palm at Asmo's statement.

"Oh, so you're sayin' it would've been okay for it to hit me?! Well, how would you like it if a plate hit you?!" More yelling and breaking plates.

"Levi." MC's voice is the most audible it's been this entire phone call. "In case I don't make it out alive, I want you to know that I love you and care for you deeply."

"What do you mean, in case you don't make it out alive?!" Silence. My screen indicates that the call has ended.

"Son of a bitch." I get up and stretch before grabbing a jacket off the floor and rushing out of my room. "If MC dies because of this, this entire realm will feel my wrath."

[meowww-ffxiv]

Yukinko x Zenos

Note: NSFW mentions / AFAB terminologies related to sex. (Yukinko, that is.)

.

Thancred wanted to ask.

Yukinko felt his restraint like it was a physical thing, whenever they were in the same room together, which was thankfully not too often these days.

Tataru could not say when she would be able to secure that ship to Old Sharlayan, and in the meantime, the Scions were run off their feet gathering reports about these grim towers and their deadly penchant for summoning twisted primals. The Rising Stones were empty more often than not, or otherwise its dwellers were scattered in different corners, poring over maps and records, speaking in hushed but urgent tones.

Even Yukinko was starting to feel the drag of stress on his nerves. So this was how Thancred caught him: sitting at the bar at two in the morning, pouring himself a shot of vodka.

At least the man started things on the right foot. As Yukinko was about to knock back his sleep aid, another glass slid to him on the table. Thancred dropped heavily into the seat next to him a moment later. "Share the spoils, will you?"

Yukinko paused. He glanced at the bottle of vodka -- closer to Thancred than it was to him -- but then remembered that his truly had brought it back from the Urianger-plus foray in Garlemald. Grudgingly, Yukinko picked it up, poured Thancred's glass, and then drank his.

The burn hadn't even fully faded before he heard: "Zenos didn't happen to tell you anything about that Fandaniel's plan, did he."

"No," Yukinko replied. "We do not talk."

Thancred sighed. "Not even pillow talk?"

"There weren't usually pillows."

Thancred took the shot. He shuddered, then cursed. "How the hells do you drink this thing straight?" he asked.

Yukinko didn't reply. He wasn't good at small talk, had never been. Instead he poured himself and his...friend...each one more glass. Well, full for him, half for Thancred. Then he got up and went around the bar, and started fishing around for the tools he'd seen F'lahminn used for her drinks-mixing.

When Yukinko straightened, he found that Thancred was staring at him.

"I know that you know what you're doing, and how much," Thancred said, "but just-- tell me one thing. He's not hurting you."

Yukinko tilted his head, torn between amusement and mild affront that Thancred had phrased it like a statement rather than a question. Then a dawning feeling of being impressed, that the lad had the audacity to bring this matter up at all. Everyone else, even Estinien, had largely and uncomfortably overlooked whatever "relations" Yukinko clearly had with Zenos.

Thus frankly approached, what could Yukinko reply with but the frank truth, in turn?

"I told him three things when he began to seek me for our sparring matches, after his return," Yukinko said, measuring tomato juice and pouring it into the tumbler. "That he shall not apply aetheric force into his weapon, that he shall not ask me again should I refuse his advances that night, and that he shall not take me in the back."

Thancred snatched up his shot glass and downed the vodka, then poured himself another one. But he said around a grimace, "Go on."

Mildly disappointed that Thancred didn't flee, Yukinko continued, "He hadn't once violated any of those conditions."

Even if sometimes their tryst was so intense that Yukinko felt like his abdomen was bruised from the inside, in the morning after... but all those trysts were had while deadly sober, and Yukinko was deadly sober when he gasped, Harder, and also meant it when he answered Zenos thrust for thrust, nails digging red lines into the corded muscles of his waist, taking him as deep as he could until Zenos growled into his collarbone and bruised his neck with another biting kiss. Until heat flooded Yukinko's belly, and then again, and again, until both their considerable stamina were spent.

Yukinko sighed harshly at the reminder, in the presence, and shifted his legs.

He knew that Zenos probably had no idea what the hells Fandaniel was planning either, solely because he did not care to know. But the thought that a possible answer had been in his grasp for months, and Yukinko had not thought to ask Zenos about it at all, angered him.

At least the fool did not have the audacity to paw at him through their resonance for another meeting since Paglth'an. Yukinko had a feeling he would not, for a time.

"I'll be damned," Thancred said. "Zenos yae Galvus is a considerate lover?"

Yukinko slowly shook his head. "You give him too much credit. Sex to him is an accessory to battle; he does it for the adrenaline. We just happen to enjoy it in the same way."

The thought had occurred to Yukinko, once upon a time, to ask Zenos to finger-fuck him like one of those Lominsan sailors used to do. Slow and sensual, and at least better prepare him for getting his pussy stretched like a lalafellin sock on a Roegardyn foot on that oversized Garlean cock.

A naive dream. Zenos barely tolerated Yukinko stroking him before he wanted inside. He only controlled himself because he knew that if it hurt in a bad way, this entire privilege would be revoked, and he had come to consider said privilege the natural second part to sparring. And when he was inside...

Actually, if the enthusiasm and the sheer savagery of his hunger hadn't blown out all of Yukinko's rational sense every time they lay together, he'd have to say that Zenos was quite mediocre at the deed. Yukinko himself had to do the task of maneuvering them both most of the time, lest the lethal beast of a man really ruptured something they would both regret.

...Or maybe this was what Yukinko was telling himself now, because he knew his dock shall not be welcoming that warship anytime soon. He might even kill the bastard the next time they meet.

The most irritating thing was, Yukinko already missed him.

Yukinko sighed again, harsher this time, and pinched the bridge of his nose. Then he reminded himself where he was in the recipe, finished adding the other ingredients and the vodka, and shook the Tumblr.

Thancred watched him pour a glass without much enthusiasm. Yukinko, for all his discernment of body language and expression, could not tell whether the man was feeling pity or horror.

Yukinko considered asking. Just for a brief moment.

But then he shrugged inwardly. It wasn't as if an answer would change anything, at this point. So he just pushed the glass at Thancred and settled back down with his own, gloomily swirling the liquid around as the reality of his chaste and desolate near-future slowly sank in.

[lady-gravity-129]

It feels wrong to not make a post addressing what I’ve seen more than 24 hours after making a different post wrongly calling out the wrong people.

-leans into microphone-

If you respect others opinions and don’t harass them over it, go on with your day. This doesn’t concern you.

Anyways,

Certain Sabezra shippers (you know who you are), don’t think you’re off the hook.

You can’t say some of the most heinous and awful things I’ve ever read and then have the audacity to get upset when you’re called out on it.

Oh? What’s that? This all started because they commented their ship on one of your posts?

Wonderful!

That doesn’t excuse harassment or what you guys said no matter which way you look at it.

If you’re that upset at the mere mention of a ship, that’s on you.

That’s all I’m going to say, I don’t want to even see you try to defend yourselves. I have screenshots of the awful, hurtful things you’ve said. You don’t say stuff that can genuinely be triggering or just overall homophobic or hurtful statements and then proceed to get upset when called out on it.

“Oh but all the fics depict (insert the triggering thing here)!” You need to tag that stuff on Ao3 in a warning. Of the 224 fics in that ship that you can see when not logged in, only a measly 3 have that warning. Unfortunate that stories with that warning exist at all but saying “all fics” depict it is just not true and you know it.

I will not be responding to anything else regarding this topic, not in new posts, reblogs, or replies. Consider this my final post on the whole situation. Irregularly scheduled posting resumes whenever I want to post something (I usually make writing posts now and I write very irregularly aka whenever I feel like it)

Again, if you respect others opinions and don’t harass others over it, then move on with your day. This post doesn’t concern you.

I’m posting this now while everything’s still relatively fresh rather than posting it at another time and coming off as trying to stir everything up again.

I’m also posting this before I go to sleep so whatever ends up happening happens while I’m asleep.

[goldonion]

This Too

“This too shall pass.” In his steady, caring voice. 

“This too shall pass.” Offered wisdom many past versions of me slapped away, unready to bear the truth that simple statement brought. 

What I’d give— more than anything— to hear him say that again.  

So I settle for the voicemails I’m hoarding in my phone. 

I settle for the recreation of his voice from a thousand strings of fallible memory. 

“This too shall pass.” I find myself murmuring when I’m frozen in the kitchen staring at a pile of untended dishes and turn to the rest of the apartment, also quite untended. 

“This too shall pass.” A reminder to breathe more than anything else. A reminder to try to stay present with myself in the ups and turns and downs of the many emotions that sometimes act like a hurricane more than a wave. 

A reminder that the clouds will part and I’ll feel the sun again. 

“This too shall pass.” A phrase best paired with serenity, and the audacity to believe in the invisible inner workings of the universe

—NRM 12/02/21

Originally posted on my personal ig.

[sparkedblaze]

Medda’s kids adopting her southern phrases. Just… very New York City kids saying “bless your heart”, “come hell or high water”, etc.

J;aokfoaiudfu

*

Charlie huffed as he made his way down the hall of the school. Jack walked with him, carrying both of their bags.

"Char, I can't believe you're takin' extra math," he shook his head in disbelief.

"Jack, I can't believe you're still talking about it," Charlie snickered, shaking his head. "I've been enrolled for this class since the end of last year. Hell, I was in it before you were."

"In math with my little brother," Jack whined out. "Who's gonna do better than me, and then mama's gonna be disappointed and tell me I gotta just apply myself more."

Charlie rolled his eyes, elbowing Jack. "You know she ain't gonna tell you that, drama queen."

He braced himself as a group of students jostled past them, Jack shielding him from most of it. "Besides, you know mama ain't like that. She just wants you to do what you like."

"And she wants me to graduate high school. Which I'm trying to do..." Jack sighed, setting their bags down beside the classroom door. "I just don't wanna disappoint her."

Charlie had the audacity to laugh at that, making Jack's eyes snap up to him, incredulous.

"Jack, you couldn't disappoint mama if you tried."

"Yeah, she's already got you under her roof, what could be more disappointin'?" Toni-who seemed to just appear at their side- laughed out as Jack swiped at him.

"Watch it, Tonio. I know where you sleep," Jack smacked his head. "I'll hide all your smokes."

Toni's eyes went wide. "Not again! It took me forever to find 'em last time!"

"Keep talkin' and you're gonna be busier than a cat on a hot tin roof lookin' for 'em."

Jack could see Charlie trying not to laugh beside him, and even Toni was cracking up.

"Careful, Jack, mama's showin'," Charlie said between bursts of laughter.

The eldest boy couldn't help but laugh along with them, shoving Toni away before snatching Charlie's hat.

"Hey!!" Charlie protested, trying to reach up for it. "C'mon cowboy, give it back!!!"

"Not until you apologize," Jack smirked, waving the hat above his head.

His eyes went wide as the hat was plucked from his hand, Finch coming around to deliver it back to Charlie.

"You know it's kind of messed up to bully your little brother, right, Jackie?" Finch asked with a smirk, ruffling Charlie's hair.

"Hey, I'm just trying to make sure he has the full high school experience," He snickered, reaching out to cup Charlie's cheeks, squishing them together. "Since no one else will."

Charlie swatted at his arms. "That's only because they know that my family'll raise seven kinds of hell before the teachers even hear about it."

"They'll raise what?" Finch burst out laughing, covering his mouth at the statement. "Char, what the hell does that mean?"

"It means they'll... like..." Charlie trailed off, trying to figure out how to explain what it meant. "Uh..."

"Oh, bless his heart," Jack patted his cheek a few times. "It means we'll fuck shit up before administration even knows something's wrong."

"Don't you 'bless your heart' me!" Charlie protested, looking at Toni. "Maneuver twenty-four, please."

"Maneuver twenty-four?" Jack asked, raising a brow, looking between them. If this was anything like some of the other maneuvers he'd seen, this would be a show.

Toni nodded, looking way too grim for Jack's liking, before he bolted off down the hallway. "I'm telling mom!"

Jack's brows furrowed, and he looked down at Charlie. "He knows mama is gonna get more mad at him for using his phone in school than she will at me for saying bless your heart... right?"

Charlie let out a quiet hum, grin matching Finch's next to him. "He knows."

Jack stared at them for a moment longer, trying to figure out what the hell was happening, before he caught sight of Toni behind them.

"Come to your senses, Higgins?"

"I think the real question here is: have you?" Toni grinned as he stepped to the side.

Jack's jaw dropped at the sight. "Tonio, you went and told on me to Davey?"

The boy in question had his hands on his hips, a brow raised, and pursed lips. All signs that pointed to Jack being in the danger zone.

"Sweetheart-"

"Don't 'sweetheart' me, Jack Kelly," Davey continued forward, meeting the group. "Are you really bullying your little brothers on the first day back?"

"Did he really tell you I was bullying them?" Jack looked up in disbelief at Toni. "That ain't what happened."

"Then tell me, Jack, what happened?"

"Char made fun of me 'cause I was sayin' things like mama says, and I took his hat and told him to apologize."

"Davey, he 'bless your heart'ed me."

"Jack! That's not nice!" Davey pressed his lips together, pursed even further than they'd been. His shoulders shook, and Jack could see the the humor in his eyes.

"You're joking." Jack's voice was deadpan as he came to the realization, and Davey just burst into laughter.

"Yeah, Jackie, I'm kidding," He wrapped Jack in a hug as Jack huffed again.

"You, as my boyfriend, are supposed to be on my side!"

"Jackie, darling, I'm on no one's side," Davey patted his cheek a few times. "I exist only to instill chaos."

"Oooookay, Davey's using big words, I'm out. Meetcha at lunch!" Toni ran off, dragging Finch along behind him.

[jeskoholic]

A Little Piece of You Chapter 13: The Mending and the Melancholy

This is a chapter from an on-going series. If you missed out on the previous entries, you can check my masterlist.

Previous chapter: X & Y

Word count: 6,804

Tags: Male OC, Angst, Mystery girl, College, Breakup (?)

Enjoy!

---

“So, after you and Wonyoung broke up, you never had a chance to talk again Jae-in? She never cared to even explain things to you, especially clarify what happened after you two broke up?” Bae Joohyun asked after a short while of silence, her attention split on consuming another one of Jae-in’s bought tarts and keeping her fury within. Her statement was met with a quick shake of the young man’s head as he then proceeded to give an answer.

“We… we actually talked again, although I would not count our next encounter to be an explanation of sorts. Of course I was still bitter towards her, and I don’t think anyone can blame me for that, so I ceased reaching out to her for a good couple of months. However, she surprisingly contacted me last semester out of nowhere. I honestly forgot about her already at that point so I’m surprised she even contacted me.”

Joohyun raised an eyebrow and glared at her brother.

“She did that? Well, what did she tell you then? What did she want of you? Did she even care to give you an explanation?”

“Actually no… she was… I don’t know what’s going on her head but she wanted to talk to me again… even invited me to go clubbing with her and promised a couple of drinks here and there. I just backed off because I know that she’s still dating the same guy from before, even above the reason that I don’t want to have anything to do with her. It would look so bad once I kept on talking to her especially when the guy finds out what she’s doing behind his back.”

Joohyun scoffed.

“The audacity; do you still have this Jang Wonyoung’s number, Jae-in? Do you still know where she lives?”

“I really don’t…. why?”

“She invited you to go clubbing, right? I’ll give her the clubbing she wants. I’m going to head there and golf-club her house’s windows right now! She was the one who asked for it, Jae-in!”

“Yah, noona, that’s not necessary… it’s been a long time and I’m not even talking to her; nor would I imagine me doing that for the next couple of years. It’s okay. I don’t intend to do so. I’ve moved on.”

“That still isn’t enough!” the step-sister raised her voice as her face dangerously turned wolfish. “My co-workers always criticize me for being too keen on boys, but if there’s one thing that I hate more than that are girls who are overly too flirty! She needs to be taught how to get her hands away from you!”

“Noona…”

“Yah, if you’re going to pick another girl who’s just like Wonyoung, I’m going to kick you off of my house,” she said with both her eyebrows raised. “Yoon Jae-in, I mean it. Your heart is way too precious to just give on people who would readily break it, you pabo. Stay single for a while and find the best girl for you, okay?”

“I… I get it noona… t-thank you.”

“And she better be pretty. I should be your standard, you small bean. Your next girlfriend should be equal or even better than your own sister, and then at least I could be confident that she can take care of such a fragile heart like you. She better be serious too. If you’re at the same age and she’s still way too playful, don’t even consider her. You need someone who is mature, not someone who’s still thinking of playing games.”

“Yah, if I were to put you as my standard, noona, I might die single because no one else could come close to you.”

She raised her fork as if aiming to smack Jae-in with it.

“Hey, if that’s the case you’re not going to die alone, you pabo! If you end up not getting married, it’s not like I’m leaving you here! Of course I’ll be watching your back! I’m being dead serious here, Jae-in-ssi. You need to be picky. You know, if only it would not turn out to be weird, I would have agreed to get married to you just so that you won’t fall to the wrong hands. I won’t even mind if that was the case.”

“Yah noona that’s so weird to say!”

“’So weird’ my butt, at least I know how to take care of you, you stupid little bean! I mean it. Next time that someone likes you, consider if they would even pass my approval. Just put that thought on the back of your head and then you’re going to get better people. I promise you.”

Bae Joohyun finally stood up from where she was seated, brushing her long shirt off of crumbs while moving to pick up the empty plate beside Jae-in, but not before moving to give her younger brother a hug. He then responded by placing his head over her narrow waist as she stood beside his sitting figure.

“And one more thing,” she continued while Jae-in hugged her in return. “Make sure that when you give promises to people that they would promise on the same way, okay? You never mentioned anything about Wonyoung’s promise to take care of you. It was only you who promised to do so, Jae-in, so I guess that’s why you two turned up the way you did. Please don’t do that next time. I don’t want anyone breaking your heart. I’ll break their souls if they do.”

Wait, did she really not…?

“Well, you better get some rest while I take care of this plate,” Jae-in’s elder sister said as she finally broke off of the hug from him. “I remembered that I had to send a document for a client as well; it almost flew off of my head because of how occupied I am with your story.”

“I will do that, noona. I’ll just finish some dues.”

“Don’t you ever talk to that Wonyoung again okay?” she said in reply while walking towards the door, pointing a red-nailed index finger towards Jae-in’s direction. “Don’t even imagine that I’m not serious when I said I’m going to kick you off.” And that statement earned a laugh from Jae-in.

“I won’t noona, I promise. Please take care!”

A smile was etched on Jae-in’s face as Joohyun disappeared through his door frame. He eyed Jang Wonyoung’s letter for a moment, the thought of even chucking it to the bin was not even entertained by the slightest. After all, he already moved on from her, and even managed to keep the letter’s message concealed from him for years. He figured there was no real reason to break that streak.

He also knew that Joohyun had an ounce of humour in every statement that she said for him, but there was no stopping all of it from being true. Somehow his misgivings were gone that night with the short conversation; allowing himself to lull back into his and Wonyoung’s story gave a huge light on his current situation with Jeon Soyeon. He mentally thanked that one conversation with Shinwon as well, as it was the one that ignited everything up to that very point.

And then he heard footsteps coming from the hallway outside of his room. There was no other real person whom it could belong to, and so he prepared himself for whatever his older sister has to say as she seemed to be rushing on her way back.

Joohyun’s figure immediately showed up again on the door a couple of seconds after that. The plate was already gone from her hands and he could see a couple of water droplets from the porcelain-like skin of her forearms. Her expression was quite shocked, as if just realizing something on the way back.

“Yah, Jae-in-ssi! What do you mean that Jang Wonyoung was your ‘first in literally everything’?!”

---

Surprisingly, that night’s sleep was one of the best I had so far. I found it ironic that that was even the case even right after the night with Soyeon; even more so after that crap ton of explanation that I had to explain to noona with the conversation. It was one of my busiest days, emotion-wise. Regardless, everything that came after that night was amazing; it shed new light on things and I was able to steady myself for the flight ahead. Being able to voice my deepest feelings for Jeon Soyeon to Shinwon was already a plus, and having to recall things with my ex, Wonyoung, and having finally tell it to someone who really cared… boy, it does not get any better than that. On the case of Soyeon, I’m glad that it was finally out. I would have unintentionally made myself suffer more for stalling unnecessarily because of my pride. I have my mind set on one path: I need to tell her the truth.

I need to let go of Soyeon.

The only question left was how am I supposed to do it?

As a couple of days passed, I was merely just thinking and debating perhaps every possible way I could convey it to her. I need to plan this carefully because I am bound to have a reaction of some form from Soyeon’s side of the spectrum. Probably a slap, her lashing out, her screaming at me, punching me…. whatever; I have to prepare myself for those kinds of things. It would be better for her to hurt me physically in that manner than me inciting a mental dent in the long run. It was, for the collective good. Good news is I got things covered up for the most part.

The part that I really don’t know was the most important as well.

I’m glad that Shinwon actually has my back on this. He’s right; I should not let this become another Wonyoung situation. But then… what exactly would Yoon Jae-in do?

Do I just blatantly tell her the truth and prepare for what’s to come?

Ignore every ounce of overthinking and head on, with a ‘fuck-it’ attitude?

Do I need to consider how it would affect the new friend group with how I’m planning to tell of these to her?

But then again… at the end of the day, they are my friends. If Soyeon would lash out and stay off of the group for a while (and it’s not like it’s surprising if she ever did that), it would be normal. It would be weird if she would not. Something was telling me that if Soyeon would cause something; a rift that would tear us apart, then so be it. I’m sure my real friends would be there for me even if it would cause such a huge scandal between us. They would understand why I’m doing it.

I really need to tell her how I feel because it’s starting to get more complicated as time continues to pass by.

I need to man up and stop fucking overthinking, because that is where the mess would begin to come. Go in there, Yoon Jae-in, tell her and then go out.

This whole self-conditioning thing is weird to do when I’m at the train heading to school. Ditching the bus for a faster, more expensive way of travel was not ideal, especially when the station was so much further from North Line compared to when I would board a bus. However, I figured that that morning stroll was my reward for finally piecing it out for my own. I really feel lighter today more than anything.

Now, I need to tell Soyeon how I feel before the week ends. I would have less time to overthink if I do it that way.

---LATER THAT DAY---

The skies have begun to darken as I would have expected. A huge blanket of nimbus covered each and every space of a once perfectly blue horizon earlier in the morning. Now, I’m glad that I decided to take the longer route this morning as my plans for an afternoon walk would have been ruined with the impending rain. I found it really weird that this resembled that day years ago when Wonyoung broke up with me. It’s just that crazy.

Anyway, I followed the normal schedule of the approaching week ahead with my final 4 PM class like usual, Social Sciences; admittedly one of the few minor engineering subjects I really learned to enjoy as the semester progressed, quite next to Modern Ethics and Philosophy.

A huge flash of light blasted through the room’s windows followed by the loud sound of thunder causing my own professor to take a pause with the lesson. The intensity of the boom was enough to cause a couple of girly squeals to come from the outdoor hallway. It was only a matter of time before the rest of the skies began to turn even darker grey until the huge, almost instant shower of rain was met from the outside. The teacher resumed the discussion, albeit ocassionally distracted by the strong downpour as well as the thundering from outside.

Minutes passed and it was already close to 5 PM when another flash cut through the sky. I could tell that it was closer from the building this time, as the booming thunder followed shortly right after that.

“I think even the skies are telling me to dismiss all of you,” the teacher, Mr Lee, said with a chuckle. “I won’t argue with natural order then. We’re just ten minutes off, so I guess I’d just give those minutes to you. Please prepare your umbrellas because it’s raining hard outside. Thank you for listening; Class dismissed!” he concluded with a curt bow.

“Thank you sir!” the class echoed in unison as we all watched him exit through the front door first before the rest of us. Then, the corridor was immediately flooded by people coming in and out of their respective classrooms. The fact that some had their wet umbrellas with them caused a lot of water to spill down the floor and mix with the dust and dirt, already adding another factor of difficulty with the already cramped space. However, this development was not really new to me as it was always the case especially on this part of NLIU.

Anyway, several minutes later I finally managed to work my way out of the crowded mess and walk through the huge hallway. I still have no idea what else I should do now that it was raining hard outside. My original plan was to stay a bit in Naevis, but again with the rain, I am sure that there would be a lot of people staying back there having the same idea. Heading to Metro station to do some window shopping and kill some time before I head home was the automatic second choice. Obviously it would be a lot more complicated to traverse there by foot at this rate. So, just because of a sudden downpour, all of my plans for this afternoon dissolved into thin air. It is what it is. I certainly cannot do anything about that.

Well, now I’m just stuck at the premises of the University with nothing else to do. Going home was a definite option, but for everyone else that had their class ending on this hour I’m pretty sure they have the same thoughts. Taxis and bus stops would be flooded and I don’t think I want to wedge myself onto that. It takes too much effort for minimal results. How else would you walk around the city if the rain simply won’t let up?

As much as it was weird to admit, I wish that I have class on this time. I’d rather stay behind the school’s rooms and let the time pass normally than get stuck without anything else to do.

With that, I decided to head to the place that I was absolutely sure would be empty save for a couple of people; the very same place that gave me sleep when I was on those terrible mood swings: the University library. It definitely was better than staying anywhere else. Plus, the silence ought to be really soothing with the current mood that I’m having.

Of course, the only thing that was really annoying about it is the long flight of stairs. At this point, I would even call them a plight.

Anyway, after a seemingly long session of walking up the NLIU Library’s aforementioned stairs, I reached the fifth, top-most floor of the already tall building. It was this huge, twin overlooking mezzanines looming over tall book shelves, with long and spacious tables arranged along within the mezzanine’s perimeter. As expected, the rain literally deleted the beautiful scenery that was Seoul from the rest of the views of the inside world, settling the surrounding window landscape with a mere, clean slate of white and grey clouds along with the occasional thunder.

I walked around the reading area, scanned the tables here in there for someone that I potentially know. It was not because I was looking for someone to keep me company, but I did that just so I’ll be able to hide from them. I really am not in such a mood to converse and I just wanted to embrace the quietness of the place. Luckily, it was not even necessary for me to even look around that much given there are not much people who were staying in this place, sadly. I feel like I still could see a couple of the same people that I saw here from before: architecture students busy with their plates, med students doing outlines of their laboratory reports, and some engineering students who just wanted some sleep for the most part. Well, the place is soothing so I think it was just perfect for what they wanted to do.

I continued to scan the place in search for a good spot, which automatically equated to the spot close to the window. I was already making my way there passing by a table with a girl occupied on writing on her notebook. After passing her, I saw a glimpse of the books she had with her and noticed a couple of engineering books that I recognized, stacked amongst piles and piles of other books about chemistry. The spot was already waiting for my arrival when I felt my phone vibrate softly on my pocket.

BZZZZT

With that, I toned down my walking to fish the phone up, eventually going to an immediate stop as I read the chat.

It was from Soyeon.

The flash of her name alone was enough to make my heart jump.

Soyeon: (Just now) Hey, are you free this afternoon by any chance, Jae-in? Our prof posted that he would not come to school because of a mishap, but it just so happened that I’m already here as well and I can’t go home because of the rain. I forgot my umbrella. I was wondering if you’re still at NLIU and maybe we can hang out… it has been a while since we saw each other. I really miss you already. Please reply if you’re free, okay?

That moment that I read her text, my heart immediately skipped a beat.

Things suddenly hit me like a truck as this felt like a very perfect opportunity. Soyeon was free, and so was I.

This might be the perfect night to call things off once and for all. The fact that everything aligned on that manner seemed to make sense. The opportunity was already there.

Should I grab it?

Should I do this now without prior planning in my head?

I promised myself that I would tell her of everything as soon as I could. That was the penultimate conclusion of my conversations with Shinwon and Joohyun-noona. I even told myself that I would do this as soon as I could, preventing any further overthinking that could possibly hinder my already solid-decision. That way, I could just tell her of everything and anything else that would follow would require nothing else from me but endurance to whatever her reaction would be.

You got this Jae-in. The heavens have given their permission; one sliver of time was all I needed.

You need to do this now. Don’t waste the time given to you.

Jae-in: Let’s meet at the cafeteria. I’ll be there in a couple of minutes.

After standing in place for what felt like minutes, I finally gathered myself and gave one last look at the spot I intended to occupy for the time being. There was a part of regret of not being able to sit on such a perfect spot, especially on such a beautiful and cozy rain like this one. However, with the thought of the event that would follow weighed greater on my shoulders. My blood was rushing all over my body, perhaps made worse with the sudden surge of adrenaline. This was it.

I turned a complete 180 from my position while still occupied on my reply to Soyeon. I was about to briskly head back towards the entrance of the mezzanine when…

WHAM

---

The sound of numerous books falling towards the floor was the sound that greeted him as soon as he felt himself bump into someone. It would turn out that his rush to leave the library was met with the girl he passed by previously, eager to replace the borrowed books on their respective shelves. It just so happened that the direction she chose was the same route Jae-in would use to exit the said mezzanine, inevitably having them both to cross paths right into each other.

“Oh my, I’m so sorry,” he said in panic and in complete embarrassment, being the first one to help gather the books for the said girl. All signs of rush was dropped as they were immediately replaced with embarrassment. “I am really sorry; I didn’t see you there.”

“I-it’s fine… I didn’t think that you’d move as well,” the girl answered with a soft voice that was almost a whisper. It was soothing already on the very first impression.

Once done, Yoon Jae-in brought the books back up and stacked them on the nearby table to align them properly for her. True enough, they were the same books he recognized from earlier, only registering the other books then by being focused on Chemistry and Molecular Theory, along with the Engineering Books he knew.

“D-do you need help putting them back?” he asked, pointing towards the stack of books rather shyly. “I-I can help you put them back if you want…. I’m really sorry for that.”\

Why am I so tense?

“N-no… I can manage. Besides, you seemed to be in a hurry. It’s okay. I would not have borrowed them if I didn’t think that I could bring them back on my own… t-thank you for the offer though…”

“Are you sure? I can spare a couple of minutes… I mean, I really feel bad for toppling these all over,” he replied as he lifted the couple of books up to return back to her waiting arms.

“I could not ask so much of you. Thank you for—“

The woman’s voice trailed off as she received the stack, unintentionally getting both hers and Jae-in’s hands in contact from under. The sudden warm sensation of a man’s skin definitely startled her, causing her face to turn towards Yoon Jae-in. There was a short flash that occurred on that very moment. Maybe it was from the lightning, or maybe both of them merely imagined it coming. With her raising her face up, it unintentionally brought her face close to his. That was only the time that Jae-in saw the face of the girl, all in close detail as he could possibly have.

Her beauty was definitely simple, yet seemingly radiated a hint of elegance. She had a plain, small face, V-shaped jawline, heart shaped lips, small nose, and an innocent expression that only helped her already beautiful visage. Despite wearing the standard green jacket of her department, her fair skin tone suited the exclusive aura of elegance she had. However, her face and her smile certainly were kind and warm; it even felt that she was the one apologetic for bumping Jae-in in the first place.

“T-Thank you for picking these up,” she said once again in that soft tone. It was her time to by shy now as it oozed out of every syllable. Jae-in certainly did not think that her already soft voice could even go softer. “Y-you’re in a hurry right?”

Jae-in blushed uncontrollably as his ears flushed red. The girl averted her gaze from his as well.

“Oh, right, right; sorry again. Please study hard,” Jae-in said as he panicked internally once again, finally giving the girl a short bow before crossing her for the exit. He left of embarrassment in attempt to conceal his flaming ears as well as his fast-beating heart; quite eager to descend from the huge tower of a library and finally make his way to the task at hand.

I need to get to Soyeon now. Sheesh, that was so embarrassing.

---

After that rather embarrassing encounter with another student, Jae-in then joined the river of students from the outside and took another route towards the school cafeteria, obviously strategized and carefully planned to prevent him from ever opening his umbrella. He rushed all across the roofed buildings of the campus, mixing with students of different departments just so he can arrive without further stress and using the longer route to shake his tension off. Soon enough, he found his way into the school’s main building and into the right wing, where the wide and spacious cafeteria was located. Due to the lateness of the afternoon as well as the on-going storm on the outside, the place was mostly empty aside from some students eating as well as staff members.

He scanned the surroundings curtly and immediately found the figure of Jeon Soyeon waiting at the far corner with an eager expression on her face along with an empty cup of tteukbokki in front of her.

“Hi Jae-in…!” Soyeon greeted with a wide smile, waving towards his figure as he approached with a heavy heart. As soon as the young man was within her reach, Soyeon moved to press her small frame against his with a sincere and tight hug.

“H-hi Soyeonnie… umm, can we please sit for a bit?” he awkwardly said, returning her hug as well. “I… I want to talk to you about something.”

Soyeon held his hand and pulled him towards the table, taking a seat next to him right after. She then kept her hands tightly clamped with Jae-in’s, seemingly expecting something bright to come from him. He’s already not fond of how enthusiastic she is.

“I’ve never saw you so eager to see me! Is there something wrong or did you just miss me that much, my Jae-in?”

Come on, Jae-in… keep it together. You got this. Calm down and tell her the truth.

“S-Soyeon… I wanted… I actually w-wanted to see you… there’s something that… something that I’ve been thinking for a while now… umm… it’s… it’s about us…”

The young woman’s face lit up the moment that she heard the word ‘us’ escape from Jae-in’s own mouth. However, she seemed to have caught on the exhausted mood and stuttered speech of Jae-in that her face shifted to a look of concern. Every ounce and attempt to even tease Jae-in was swept out of the waters.

“Are you okay Jae-in? You look pale… oh my god, even your hands are cold. Did something happen?”

BOOM

A bright flash followed by a loud thunder was seen from the outside, effectively distracting Soyeon from Jae-in as she moved to see through the windows.

“Gosh, the rain’s really pouring down hard here. This is such a bad timing to not bring an umbrella.”

“Soyeon,” Jae-in began once again as soon as he regained his composure. “I have… I have something to tell you… sorry for interrupting but… this is something that has been bugging me for a long time… I… I’ve wanted to tell this to you…”

Shit, I’m so fucking nervous. This cold weather is definitely not helping out.

Soyeon stared blankly at him and then supplied her with a shy smile as well as two raised eyebrows.

“Is… Is this about what I think it is, Jae-in?”

“This… this is… yes; this is about what happened after Skylight… I think I have a response for what you asked me before. Soyeon… I have an answer already…”

“Is that true? Oh my god… what is it? I’m eager to know what it is!”

“I know that… I know that we’ve sort of been together after that, right? We… we acted so sweet together and… we’ve done a couple of things that normally only dating people would do. Umm… after your confession everything just aligned ourselves and we… we just treated each other as if we’re dating. If anything, only an official label was left for that to work out as it should have… Would you agree that with how the situation went on, the decision seemed to dial down from my end, right? The way that this brought us… it boils down to me making the decision…”

She nodded and spoke: “Of course… I intended it to be that way, Jae-in-ssi… I made it clear to you since then that I was really serious with my feelings for you, to the extent that I am even going way out of line at times just to prove that I really love you… umm… oh my… I’m getting nervous with where this is going…”

Soyeon rubbed her hands with his. Jae-in in turn, breathed in heavily.

“Soyeon… for the past weeks and months that you’ve told me your feelings, you proved to me very much how serious you were to me. I already felt everything that you needed me to feel… every kiss, every hug, every moment we shared together… I felt that you were really that much into me. There’s no denying that. I’ve never felt so appreciated for the longest time ever and I will forever be grateful and flattered that one Jeon Soyeon even took a liking into me. You were such a talented individual, appreciative and very loving as well, which is why I don’t think that I am even deserving of the attention that you’re giving…

“I’m sorry Soyeon, but I don’t think we should continue this… this thing that’s going between us. I don’t think I can return the same feelings that you’ve been giving me.”

The world might as well have frozen for the couple of them as silence shrouded the succeeding minutes. Jae-in sat in his place thinking of what to follow to that, yet also debating whether to not add another statement to the mix while Soyeon digested what he just said. The young Korean woman’s expression was not grim; it was merely just a blank stare that felt a thousand times scarier than if she would have glared at him. He even thought of repeating the statement in case she did not hear it the first time, and he could never have been more relieved that he did not do that. The tension was so high up between them that it would only be a matter of time before someone would eventually break.

This time, it was Jae-in… and perhaps he never should have spoken up after denying his chance the first time.

“Soyeon… Please don’t get me wrong… I appreciate each and every single thing that you did. I would have loved to stay if that was the case but… I can’t keep up. I can’t just let myself wake up every night to respond to you, to go out with you in the middle of the evening… I have denied a lot of your invitations to drink because… because you know that I just can’t wedge it on my schedule because of a lot of things.

“Can’t you see…? There are a lot of things that we do not agree upon, and a lot of those involve things that I normally do in my everyday life. I don’t think that I can let those things go just yet…  Lately, I feel like I’m not being myself because… because I’m letting you drag me too much into situations… I sorry… just—“

“Is this a joke?” Soyeon said with a straight face; her eyes starting to get glassy. “You’re kidding me, right Jae-in?”

“I’m not… actually I am—“

“I never asked you to do those things in return, Jae-in… I did everything because I wanted to prove my love for you! I did those things because this is who I really am, and I wanted to show you the purest form of me that I could show, why can’t you see that?”

“Hey, it’s not… it’s not that I did not see those… I told you; I felt everything... I felt how serious you were to me, and Hongseok and the others were a testament to everything that happened…”

“Why are you ending us then? If that’s the case then why the fuck are you letting me go?”

“Because… I feel like things are starting to get out of hand. I feel like we’re slowly starting to do things that only normal couples would do… some of which are even too overboard. I would lie if I did not say that I did not like any of those things, but I feel like… I want to save it soon. I’m being too overwhelmed and I want to stop it before it even gets worse… I… I’m not yet ready for any of these…”

“Was… was this because of what happened in the private room? Did you really think that… that we’re about to do it then? Was this because I’m being too close and too stuck with skinship that you’re feeling uncomfortable? Tell me, Jae-in! Tell me what’s wrong with me and I will change everything just to be with you! Tell me what I would do so that you can give this doomed relationship a chance, please!”

“Soyeon please… even if I wanted to, that would be too unfair for your end. I don’t want to give you the wrong ideas; to give you hope that there’s something at the end of this tunnel… I’m not yet ready. I don’t think I’m in the condition to head on a relationship right now; I hope you understand.”

“Then everything that I did for you was all for nothing?”

“Soyeon, please,” he said before reaching out his hands to hold both of hers once again. However, Soyeon already anticipated the action and immediately withdrew them as soon as she felt the contact of skin. “I’m doing this to be fair to you, otherwise—“

“The only thing being unfair h-here is you! I’m all i-in it for you, Yoon Jae-in, why the fuck can’t y-you see that? I thought you said before that you wanted t-this but why are you doing this to me n-now?! Why are you already l-letting us go before we even get a chance to b-be a thing?!” Her voice said, shaking with emotion.

“Soyeon… I’m not yet ready. I… I have a lot of things to prioritize and do. I don’t think, with a good conscience, that you deserve to be treated like this. I don’t want you to hope and wait for something to happen when I can’t promise you anything in the near future. I just want you to be free and not be confined with me… there are a lot of people there. I’m sure there are a lot of guys better than me. I’m sorry Soyeon, but it’s not yet time…”

That was the time that Soyeon finally let her tears trail down her cheek.

“I h-hate you, Yoon J-jae-in,” she snapped, this time glaring at him with a pair of teary eyes trying to keep her anger within.

“I’m sorry Soyeon… I really am. I just can’t do it this time because of my responsibilities and—“

“TO HELL WITH YOU AND YOUR DAMN RESPONSIBILITIES,” Soyeon roared as she finally reached her tipping point. Her angry voice echoed across the small cafeteria and took the attention of the few students and onlookers while she shouted at Jae-in with tears on her eyes. “YOU SHOULD’VE SAID ‘NO’ BACK THEN. YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE RETURNED MY KISSES WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE! YOU MADE ME BELIEVE THAT THERE WAS SOMETHING AT THE END OF THIS GODDAMN THING JAE-IN! IF YOU DIDN’T LIKE ME THEN YOU SHOULD’VE SAID BEFORE I WASTED ALL MY DAMN TIME ON YOU! I HATE YOU JAE-IN! I HATE YOU!”

In that instant, Soyeon immediately stood up and supplied Jae-in with one deadly glare. As a reflex, Jae-in stood as well and tried to calm her down by attempting to hold her hand, yet it only made her state worse. Soyeon immediately swatted his extended hand with astounding force, slapping it off of her. Then, to his surprise, Jeon Soyeon ran towards the cafeteria door without an ounce of warning, taking her bag with her and exited towards the raging downpour from the outside.

There she was, on the middle of the rain and thunder, she ran without a care in the world even ignoring the constant splash and flow of water on her face and clothes. She braved the wet grounds of the university taking any means necessary to distance her from Jae-in.

Jae-in, on the other hand, immediately fished his bag and umbrella and immediately followed Soyeon to the outside. He chased her against the continouos gush of rain, his umbrella keeping the majority of his face dry while he ran for her amidst the slippery floor. Soon, he finally reached Soyeon’s drenched figure outside of the school’s Medicine Department building.

With the rush of adrenaline on his body, Yoon Jae-in reached for Soyeon’s arm and tugged it to get her attention. It was effective after all; Soyeon finally stopped on her tracks and turned her figure towards him; her face flashing with anger as her hair, clothes, and face were all soaked with rain and possibly even remnants of her tears.

“Soyeon, please,” Jae-in said as he brought the umbrella over the pair of their figures. “Don’t do it like this. Don’t go towards the rain like this. I know that you hate me now, but please, take it. It’s the last thing I can do for you. I’m really sorry…”

Soyeon gently approached Jae-in, and with a swift movement of her arm she smacked the umbrella out of his grasp, leaving the both of them to be engulfed by the heavy rain.

“Did you even have feelings for me, Jae-in?” she asked, every syllable oozing with anger. “Tell it to my face. Tell the truth. Did you even like me even for just a little bit?”

There was a pause, a long and drawn out one as they were both drowned by the noise of the rain around them.

“Did you even love me, Jae-in?”

Jae-in finally looked back at her eyes, through the drops of rain, tears, and the glare on them and met her pupils. He paused for a moment, took in some air, and finally shook his head slowly.

SLAP

“Stay there. Stay there the whole night. Stay there until you die. You deserve worse than that. You’re going to regret this soon, Yoon Jae-in.”

The sting of Soyeon’s slap had only begun to bit in him right after she uttered the words that felt like a curse. The force of Soyeon’s slap was so strong; so filled with hatred and emotion that it forced Jae-in’s head towards his right and eyeing the dead umbrella that lay lopsided on his foot. Slowly, he turned his gaze back up front and he saw the figure of Jeon Soyeon walking on the rain and this time away from him once again. For the first time, he felt his feet numb and unresponsive. He wanted to chase her, but majority of his body declined until Jeon Soyeon finally turned a corner and disappeared into the rain.

Jae-in was left there devastated and dumbstruck, cheek stinging from Soyeon’s solid slap. His eyes merely gazed towards the direction where Soyeon disappeared, with the ghost of her final glaring eyes staring into his soul knowing that he might not get the chance to see her up close ever again.

[clairehadenough]

I have received a couple of asks saying something similar and I honestly don’t understand what’s that about? Please can you guys explain? When did I wish terrible thing on anyone?///

Please don't throw stones then try and hide your hands. You tried hiding behind faux-concern and sarcasm, but that's a pretty specific outcome from what you interpret as "jealousy". You're basically saying they deserve cancer for their negative feelings (plus, from a medical standpoint, that's not totally sound).

And I don't think everyone who's pointed out her connection to Chris as a reason she ever got to meet these people is necessarily jealous. 1) it's kind of true. 2) There seems to be this undercurrent of conflating her getting married to Chris and getting to meet these people with her overall skills as an actress. With all the talk of people getting ahead in life based on who they know vs talented people who don't have those connections who loose out in opportunities, I expected people to take a more nuanced approach to how they talk about this. But I guess not. 🤷‍♂️

Sorry it’s going to be a long reply because I am actually baffled at the audacity of what I have just read.

First of all I don’t try to hide anything or send messages that have to be read between the lines. When I have something to say I say it point blank. I think it’s pretty clear on my blog but I don’t know, you must be new here.

Like I said, I literally googled what were the medical consequences of jealousy and the first article I got was from the University of Rochester medical center. I did not make it up to be funny. Here’s the link :

So you saying ‘from a medical standpoint, that's not totally sound’ is a bit ridiculous. Unless you’re a doctor and have another theory, in that case, please educate me.

Another nonsense statement you made was ‘You're basically saying they deserve cancer for their negative feelings’. Don’t you dare put words in my mouth. I send my dad articles day in day out about how bad smoking is for him and how he risks having lung cancer if he doesn’t. Does that mean I’m saying he deserves cancer????? Of fucking course my father’s health is more important to me than the anon’s but I don’t wish them or anyone else any harm. I was showing them what they are risking for being so jealous about someone so insignificant to their live.

And finally, you again put words in my mouth and that’s really annoying. That specific anon was saying that Alba didn’t ‘deserve’ to be there or to meet big names like Scarlett and Stanley because she wasn’t in their league. That was a very stupid thing to say and -I insist- is only a sign of jealousy because she wasn’t there as an actress that Chris was trying to shove in front of their faces to maybe get her an opening or a role. In that case, yes what that anon said makes sense. But she was there as his (then) girlfriend/fiancee and no matter who was around that table, she had every right being there. So spare us the ‘but lots of talented people don’t always have connections to get the opportunity’, because IN THIS SPECIFIC INSTANCE, it doesn’t apply.

Can’t believe you want a man to keep his wife home for a dinner with friends because said friends are more talented than her in the job they all do.

I will not be replying to any more asks about this specific subject, I think I said enough and only made my stance clearer because some people MISUNDERSTOOD and were offended. In the end, I an only responsible of what I say, not what you understand.

[children-of-epiales]

WIP WHENEVER

Tagged by @shegetsburned & @poisonedtruth

“ What do you want from me?” Plague sat up straight, genuine confusion contorting their face. 

Fury decided to pretend not to notice, resulting in her shrugging in response. 

She might have gotten away with it, if only the North American didn’t have the audacity to make their next statement. 

“ I came here to be alone,” Plague stated firmly. “ Whenever I left the room-that was me making it clear that I didn’t need anyone else bothering me.”

“ You didn’t need other people to bother you?” Fury began to scold them, her hands falling and smacking the table just hard enough that Plague withdrew themself just a little from the furniture. “ That’s the whole point of being a team-we all bother each other. But you? You try to consider yourself an exception and put in your two cents when you think it matters. Otherwise you want to be left alone, and for what fucking reason?” 

Plague’s lips tightened, their teeth grit which kept from saying anything; this they never understood because in moments when they grit their teeth, they found themself at a loss for words. Right now, the loss was worse than ever. 

“ Don’t have anything to say now, Sweetness?” Fury’s head tilted. Her eyes burned through the brunettes being, so much so that they gave up on the stare down and found a good spot on the floor to focus on.

 Eventually Fury gave up on the effort; she thought of something else she could have mentioned, something that might bring out the side of Plague she somehow brought out once before. But she had no more energy to put into the issue. Not this time. 

 “ Funny how that works...” She commented in a tone so sour, it sounded as if she were mourning something.

Fury stood up. The chair screeching against the floorboard earned her Plague’s attention for the few minutes the former would give them.

[obsessivelollipoplalala]

Sometimes I wonder if they also hate what Brian says because in their mind the only image of Freddie that exists is the rockstar Freddie you know the big macho man everything that the media describes him as.

But for Brian Freddie is a human first, someone he spent years with and loves him like family.

Because there's absolutely no reason to question anything Brian says otherwise. It's almost like people don't want Freddie anything but the media image.

I think this is true for every person who can't cope with what Brian says about Freddie, that he says something which fundamentally challenges their headcanons about him. Since Brian has always seen Freddie as human first, as you said, and has been one of the people who has emphasized his shyness, struggles, and heartbreak the most, that must play a role in people dismissing what he says and having the brain worms audacity to think they know a deceased stranger better than one of his best friends did. It's really strange to see statements from Brian about one of his closest friend's behavior in relationships and struggles with love, or struggles with rock 'n' roll culture and being used by fake friends, and go:

I don't know why people are so wedded to the wild, shallow, hedonistic version of Freddie that the media runs with, because if nothing else, that's just boring. Brian telling us about the shy man who was vulnerable, generous to a fault, and yearning for love beneath the wacky persona is a lot more interesting.