#misha's hands are beautiful so it helps getting inspired

[youchangedmedestiel]

"Cas and his hands" because, trully, it's "Misha and his hands"

It is, obviously. But it was more in the universe of the show and how Cas perceives the human world in his vessel through Jimmy's hands which become his at some point, and I wrote that at the time:

"The first time he came on Earth, using Jimmy Novak as a vessel, he studied them. He watched them as he made them move. They are a very useful tool. That’s what he thought at first. Only a tool. But they are more than that.

They can reach out and touch someone’s soul. They can also hurt and inflict enormous pain for the receiver but also for him. Because there is no comparable pain than being the one doing the hurting on the people loved.

They can heal too, fortunately. They can be so gentle and comforting when they touch the man he loves. They can do so much more.

They can touch and provide great pleasure to that man. They can make him so vulnerable. They seem more powerful than ever. More powerful than when they kill a demon just by touching the forehead, when the man he loves is shaking under their touches.

Human’s hands are truly an astonishing creation, he can give credits to Chuck for that one."

[thefirstcourtesan]

Little Joys (Bryce/MC, past Ethan/MC)

Little Joys

By Misha

Disclaimer- Note Mine.

Author’s Notes- So I was inspired by this ask I saw @jerzwriter reblog and how Meredith and Bryce would celebrate international surfing day and I realized Meredith is extra enough that she would celebrate every single little holiday. I took her list of holidays from this site (even if it doesn’t have International Surfing Day on it 😂). This is set a year after Book 3. I have a full, complicated history for Meredith (and why she and Bryce took 3 years to be official) but have not written very much of it. All that is relevant for this story is that she and Ethan did have a thing, but never officially, and in the end she chose Bryce but she still had some wariness, commitment issues and they were taking things at her pace. Also, she is on the diagnostic team, but turned down running it and let Tobias take the job instead.

Rating- PG-13

Summary- There is a holiday for everything and Meredith Pierce makes it her mission in life to celebrate them all and to find as much joy as she can.

Word Count- 4170

“You are the only person I know who would schedule a girl’s night on a random internet day,” Jackie grouched as she settled into the sofa of Meredith and Bryce’s apartment. 

June 1- Dare Day

“I think it is fun!” Sienna said brightly, giving Meredith a beaming smile. 

“Sorry, I stand corrected, you are one of only two people,” Jackie aid dryly. She looked at Aurora, “why do we hang out with them?”

Aurora hid a smile by bringing a drink to her lips. “Sorry, Jackie, I think ‘dare day’ is kind of a fun excuse to get together.”

Jackie groaned. “I need new friends.”

“No, you need to do your dare,” Meredith told her, “Now write Tobias a text with ten things you like about him.”

“I can’t believe you are making me feed your boss’s giant ego,” Jackie grouched, but she picked up her phone. “Next year I am checking out your stupid calendar, so I can busy be all year.”

**

June 2- National Doughnut Day 

“Doughnut?” Meredith offered Ethan as she entered his office, a bakery box in her hands. 

He looked up from his paperwork. “Do I want to know the occasion?”

“It’s doughnut day!” Meredith said brightly, “so I picked these up this morning.” 

Jackie might have grouched about Dare day, but she had been pretty happy to receive multiple doughnuts that morning. 

“Of course it is,” Ethan said, rolling his eyes even as he reached into the box. “I assume this is not the only reason you are bothering me?”

There was a fondness in his voice that contradicted his words. Ethan and Meredith might not have worked as a couple, but Meredith knew the gruff man sincerely cared for her. 

“Tobias sent me to remind you that the diagnostic team is going to need temporary help the weekend of June 16-18.” 

Ethan glanced at his calendar. “Oh yes, Because he and Harper will be at a conference and you have vacation booked.” He looked at her, “I can’t persuade you to change your dates?”

“Nope,” Meredith told him, “Bryce and I are going to California. It is International Surfing Day and I am surprising him.”

“Of course it is,” Ethan muttered, “does Lahela enjoy being surprised by random holidays?”

It was a loaded question and they both knew it, but Meredith forced a bright smile. “He does, because he loves me.” It was a low blow and she knew it, but she also didn't care. Ethan had started it. 

Her response hit the mark and Ethan’s face immediately went blank. “Tell Tobias I will take care of the schedule.”

It was a dismissal and Meredith turned to leave, but paused at the door when Ethan called out her name. 

“Meredith.”

She turned around, but didn’t say anything. 

“Thanks for the donut.”

**

June 3rd- National Trail Day 

“This is a perfect Saturday,” Bryce commented with his trademark easy grin, “my favorite girls and a beautiful trail.” 

Kiki rolled her eyes. “You are so corny.”

She was visiting for the weekend, which was one of the reasons that Meredith had planned the hike. The other being that it was National Trail day. 

“You love it,” Bryce said, pulling her into a one arm hug.

“Gross,” Kiki muttered, but she was smiling. 

**

June 4th- National Cheese Day

“Have I ever mentioned you’re my favorite?” Tobias asked as Meredith came into the office carrying a cheese platter. 

“Meredith is everyone’s favorite,” Harper said with a warm smile, “what is the occasion?”

“National cheese day,” Meredith answered, setting the platter on the table, “it is also national applesauce cake day.”  She pulled a cake tin out of her bag. “Kiki and I made this last night.”

Bryce had had to go to work after their hike, so she and Kiki had been on the other. The younger girl had grouched a bit but she had actually  seemed to enjoy the activity. 

“I don’t care what Ethan says, I think all these national days are delightful,” Tobias told her, reaching for a piece of cheese, “I am especially fond of ‘dare day’, I’m thinking of printing that text from Varma and framing it on my office wall.” 

Meriden laughed. “She’ll murder us both.”

“Might be worth it,” Tobias joked, “but seriously Meredith, thank you for the snacks. It really improves the mood around here.”

Harper smiled. “Tobias  is right, I know I appreciate  your guestrues and I can’t wait to try that cake when I have my coffee later.”

“Did someone say cake?” Damien Blake, the fourth member of their diagnostic team, asked as he entered the office. His eyes widened as he saw the cake and cheese platter. “Cheese too, this is the best day.” He grinned at Meredith. “I assume, we have you to thank?”

Meredith nodded, pleased by the warm reaction of her colleagues. 

**

June 5th- World Environment Day 

“I heard this was your idea,” Ethan commented as he approached Meredith outside the hospital where employees were cleaning up the grounds. 

“I might have suggested it,” she admitted, noting  with pride at how many people had signed up for the activity, “it is World Environment Day.”

“So naturally, an employee trash pick up day makes sense,” Ethan agreed, he looked at the crowd, “it looks like there were a lot of volunteers.”

Mereidth smiled. “I guess a lot of people here care about the environment.”

“Or perhaps, it is the organiser,” Ethan said softly, “I think you underestimate your effect on the morale of this hospital, Meredith. I might grouch about your obsession with pointless holidays, but I have been told it brings smiles to a lot of people's faces.” 

Meredith blushed. “That is why I do it,” she said softly, “a hospital can be a bleak place and if I can bring a little joy to people’s lives, then I want to do that.”

“It is what makes you special,” Ethan told her softly, gazing at her with an intensity that made her bite her lip and look away. 

“I just do what I can,” she said softly, “and I should get back to the garbage clean up or Jackie is liable to start chucking it at my head if she thinks I am slacking off.” 

She hurried away from Ethan. She didn’t regret choosing Bryce a year ago, but sometimes she was very aware of what might have been. 

**

June 6th- National Gardening Exercise Day 

“This community garden is so cool,” Inez commented, looking around. “Thank you for inviting me along, Meredith.”

“You’re welcome,” Meredith said with a smile, “our apartment doesn’t have any green space, but I love gardening. Sienna and I try to come here at least twice a month.”

Sienna had been working that day, so Mereidth had to find someone else to accompany her on National Gardening Exercise Day. Inez had seemed like a natural choice and the other woman had eagerly agreed. 

“I can see why,” Inez commented, “there is something  very relaxing about working with nature. I will definitely be back.” 

**

June 7th- National Chocolate Ice Cream Day

“What’s this?” Meredith asked in surprise as Bryce handed her a bag. She looked inside, it was full of cartons of chocolate ice cream. 

“Happy National chocolate ice cream day,” he told her with a smile. 

She shot him a surprised look. 

“I peaked at your calendar,” he admitted, “I felt like someone should surprise you for once.” 

Meredith put the bag on the counter and threw her arms around Bryce, “I love you.”

“I love you too,” he told her, holding her close, “and I am so in awe of you. You go out of your way to make every day special,for the people around you and I just wanted to give you back some of that energy.” 

Meredith blinked back tears, feeling unexpectedly emotional. She snuggled against Bryce’s chest, soaking up the feel of him. 

After a moment, he pulled away teasingly, “not that I ever get sick of holding you, but my grand gesture loses some of its impact if it melts all over the counter.”

**

June 8th- Best Friends Day 

“I approve of all the ice cream,” Sienna commented, lifting a spoon to her mouth, “Bryce did good.”

Mereidth smiled, “he did. And luckily today is National Best Friends Day, so I don’t have to eat it all myself.” 

She bit her lip. “But I had another reason for asking you over.” She got up and grabbed her purse, taking a box out and handing it to Sienna. 

Sienna looked at it and her eyes widened. “Really?” 

“Well, I haven’t taken it yet,” Meredith yet, “but I have been feeling a little off and emotional and my periods are always all over the place, so…” 

“Oh My God!” Sienna said, jumping up to hug Meredith, her bowl of chocolate ice cream forgotten. “You have to take the test now!”

Meredith nodded. “Yeah.” She took the box back. “I just didn’t want to do it alone and I didn’t want to tell Bryce yet.”

“He’ll be thrilled,” Sienna assured her, “as long as you are.”

“I am,” Meredith said,”I mean I will be, if I am. I want this, Sienna. I told you I was going to tell Bryce that I was ready for more when we are in California. So if this is real… I want to wait until then.”

Sienna squeezed her hand. “I think that sounds perfect, now go take that test and let me know if I am about to be an aunt!”

**

June 9th- National Strawberry Rhubarb Pie Day

“There’s my favourite doctor,” Nurse Sarah commented, greedily eyeing the pie in Meredith’s hands. 

“I heard that,” Bryce commented, detouring towards the nurses station. “I thought I was your favourite, Sarah.” 

She rolled her eyes. “Meredith brings me pie, what do you do for me?” 

“I am a big fan of Mereidht’s pie,” Bryce agreed with a lecherous grin that had Meredith smacking him. 

Sarah shook her head. “I don’t know how you put up with him.”

“Hey!”

“He is very pretty,” Meredith said with a grin. 

“You can have your pretty boy, I’ll stick to pie,” Sarah told her, “it’s a lot less trouble. What flavour did you bring me?” 

“Today is National Strawberry Rhubarb Pie day,” Meredith answered, “Sienna and I went strawberry picking yesterday and then baked the pie.” 

“You and Dr. Trinh are treasures to this hospital,” Sarah told her, eagerly taking the pie. 

“In that, we are in agreement,” Bryce said, placing a kiss on Meredith’s head, “Meredith is definitely a treasure.”

Sarah smiled at him. “And that attitude is hey you are my third favourite.”

“I‘ll take it,” Bryce said with an easy grin, “and now that you have your pie, I am going to steal our mutual favourite doctor away.” 

“I’ll warn everyone to avoid the supply closets,” Sarah quipped, causing Bryce to laugh and Meredith to blush. 

**

June 10th- Ball Point Pen Day

“Thanks for agreeing to this,” Meredith told Tobias as she unpacked the boxes of ballpoint pens. 

“Yes, because it was a hardship to agree to a clever marketing strategy for the diagnostic team that I didn’t have to do any of the work for,” Tobias said with a smile, “I definitely should be the one thanking you, Meredith. This is a great idea.”

“It’s not too cheesy?” She asked. She would never have suggested it when Ethan was in charge of the diagnostic team, but Tobias was not Ethan. 

“It is definitely cheesy,” Tobias told her, “but it is also clever. I had been meaning to order us pens for a while, handing them out on Ball Point Pen today, just makes it better. Plus the whole hospital waits to see what your holiday of the day will be, so these will definitely be widely received.” 

“That is not true,” Meredith said, trying not to blush, “I don’t think that many people pay attention to my silly little holiday thing.”

“Oh, they definitely do,” Tobias told her, “and it’s brightened up this whole place. People have even been searching the internet and taking brts over which holiday you will choose for what day.”

Meredith blushed. She had no idea that people were taking it seriously , she had just started doing it for fun. 

“I mean it when I say you have brightened this place up,” Tobias told her, “and on that note, lets go hand out pens.”

** 

June 11th- National Corn on the Cob Day

“So Meredith goes all out every single day?” Elijah commented, a cob of corn in his hand, “apparently I am missing out.”

He had come for a visit and Meredith had decided to throw a cook-out to celebrate, as part of National Corn on the Cob Day. 

“That is one way to put it,” Jackie said with an eye-roll, “or we could argue you are the lucky one because you miss all the corniness.” 

“Technically, I am not missing the corniness, just everything else,” Elijah said and Jackie groaned while everyone else laughed. 

“I hate you all,” Jackie muttered, even as she grabbed another ear of corn. 

**

June 12th- Red Rose Day

Organising enough red roses to give a single rose to every single on duty employee at Edenbrook was not an easy task. She’d had to do-ordinate with HR to get a list of who would be on schedule and she’d gotten a couple of the maintenance guys to help her meet the florist and distribute them. 

Although Meredith had been surprised by how easy it had been to get the flowers themselves. The florist had even offered a steep discount when she’d explained why she wanted them. 

“What a sweet idea,” the woman at the shop had said, “I am sure it will brighten everyone’s day and working at a hospital, they definitely need it.” 

And so Meredith got the flowers she needed and made sure they were distributed to all the employees. She hadn’t bothered to assign herself one, the point was doing this for others, which is why she froze when she got to the diagnostic office and saw the table literally covered in roses. 

“Did people give theirs back?” She asked, a little crushed by the thought. 

“Why don’t you go look?” Tobias asked with a grin. 

Meredith took a cautious step, realizing that there were various arrangements and not just loose flowers and that many of them had cards. 

Her eyes watered as she read all the cards. There was a boquet from Bryce (which was definitely unnecessary because he hadn’t already surprised her with one at home that morning), one from the diagnostic team, from Jackie, Aurora and Sienna, from the nurses,  from HR and even one from Ethan. 

“This is too much,” she said, taking in all the flowers. 

“So says the lady who made sure every single on-duty employee got a rose and who frequently brings in baked goods,” Tobias told her, “you deserve a little appreciation, Meredith, and apparently most of the hospital thought so.”

Meredith just nodded, taking in all the flowers (although mentally she was already figuring out how to divide them between in-need patients, but the cards she would keep and treasure). 

**

June 13th- Pigeon Appreciation Day

“Why are we throwing bread at winged menaces?” Zaid asked with his usual frown. 

“Because it is pigeon appreciation day,” Meredith said, although honestly she was shocked Zaid had agreed to accompany her to the park. Although, she knew it was mostly because�� of Inez. 

Bryce had been going to go with her, but he got called into surgery and everyone else was working. She’d mentioned to Inez that she would be going alone and an hour later Zaid had appeared and grumpily told her he would be going with her to the park. 

So here they were.

“There really is a day for everything,” Zaid muttered and frowned as a bird came too close, “can’t we appreciate them from a distance?” 

**

June 14th- National Nursing Assistant Day 

“Thank you so much, Dr. Piece,” Hannah, one of Edenbrook’s nursing assistants, said as she took the package of baked goods that  Meredith handed her. Meredith and Sienna had teamed up to make care packages for all the nursing assistants for National Nursing Assistant Day. 

“No, thank you for everything you do,” Meredith told her, “you and the other nurses assistants are one of the reasons Edenbrook runs so smoothly.”

Hannah smiled shyly. “It is really sweet of you to say so. Can I tell you something?”

“Of course.”

“The other NAs and I, we were more excited to see what you would do than what the hospital would do,” Hannah confessed, “the lunch the hospital provides is mice, but we all really love it when you and Dr. Trinh bake.” 

Meredith felt a warmth fill her at the compliment. “Thanks for telling me that, Hannah, I really appreciate it.”

**

June 15th- National Nature Photography Day

“Do I dare ask what you are doing?”

Meredith turned at teh sound of the familiar gruff voice. 

“I am trying to take pictures of birds for national nature photography day,” she told Ethan, “but it turns out nature photography is not my calling.”

“I guess you’ll have to give up your dreams of a career in photography and settle for medicine,” Ethan said in a dead-pan voice. He sighed. “Hand me the camera.”

Meredith did as he asked, handing over Bryce’s precious camera (she swore he had winced when she’d asked to borrow it, even though he tried to hide it). 

Meredith watched as Ethan evaluated the camera. “This is a nice piece of equipment,” he said after a moment, “I take it, it’s not yours?”

“No, it’s Bryce’s,” Meredith answered, “he likes to takes pictures as a hobby.” 

“Photography can be a rewarding hobby,” Ethan agreed, fiddling with the settings on the camera. He looked at the tree in the courtyard critically, obviously considering his angles. A few minutes later, he handed the camera back to her. “I think I got some Swiss story shots.”

“Thank you,” Mereidth said sincerely, “I know you think my holiday of the day thing is silly.”

“Perhaps,” Ethan agreed, “but it is important to you.”

Several unspoken things hung in the air before Ethan broke the silence. “If I don’t see you before tomorrow, have a good trip.”

Meredith nodded. “Thanks, Ethan. For everything.”

He looked at her for a long moment before turning and walking away. 

Meredith watched him go and then turned her attention back to the camera. Now that she had her photos, she should get it back to Bryce so he could stop secretly fretting. 

**

June 16th- Take a Road Trip Day

“Bryce,” Meredith shook her boyfriend gently and then with more force, “Bryce, wake up.”

He blinked up at her. “What time is it?”

“6 a.m.”

Bryce sat up with a scowl. “Meredith, baby, I love you more than anything, but why am I awake at 6 a.m on a day when I don’t have to work until 5?” 

Even as he complained, he was reaching out to grab her and settle her on his lap. 

“Because we’re going on a trip,” Meredith explained, “today is take a road trip day. I mean, technically we’re flying, but I have a rental car waiting for us, so I think it counts…”

“Babe, I have to work all weekend,” Bryce reminded her.

“So, actually, you don’t,” Meredith told him, “I arranged for you to have the weekend off ages ago. Julie in HR helped clear your schedule and also agreed to keep it a surprise. Harper helped too and Dr. Tamaka.”

“I guess it helps to be the hospital's favorite doctor,” Bryce teased, “and obviously I am referring to myself, not the woman who keeps the whole hospital in baked goods.” 

“It has it’s uses,” Meredith agreed, smiling down at him, “tomorrow is International Surfing Day and I couldn’t imagine my surfer boy trapped in Boston, so we are going to Califronia.”

Bryce shook his head in awe. “I love you so fucking much. You are amazing, you know that?”

“I like it when you tell me,” Meredith admitted, leaning forward to kiss him. 

Bryce gripped her hips as he deepened the kiss. “How long do we have before we have to leave for our flight?”

“Long enough,” Meredith assured him, rocking into him with purpose, enjoying the groan he let out. 

“Good,” Bryce said, his grip tightening as he suddenly reversed their positions so that he was on top of her. “Because I want to show you just how amazing I think you are.”

**

June 17th- International Surfing Day

“Are you sure you don’t want to surf with me?” Bryce asked as he prepared his board. 

Mereidth shook her head. “No, I am happy to watch.” 

When she had booked the trip, she had planned on surfing with Bryce, but then things had changed. So instead she would play spectator. 

Bryce nodded and disappeared into the waves. 

They had a satisfying day on the beach. Meredith enjoyed the sun and the sand and watching her hot surfer boyfriend. 

Later, when Bryce had finished for the day and they had returned to their hotel, he pulled her in for a long, steamy kiss. “Thank you for doing this for me,” he told her, holding her close, “the fact that you went to all this trouble, I still can’t believe it.”

“I would do anything for you, Bryce,” Meredith told him sincerely. She took a deep breath and then gazed into his eyes, “international surfing day isn’t the only reason I planned this trip. I’m ready, Bryce, I’m ready to be all in, forever.”

It had been almost a year since he had told her what he wanted for their future and then promised to wait until she wanted it too, until she was ready to go all in. 

Bryce’s eyes widened and then he pulled her towards him, kissing her deeply and hungrily. 

“I love you,” he told her. He suddenly let go of her and quickly crossed the room to his suitcase, pulling out a familiar black box. 

Meredith gasped. She knew he had a ring, but she hadn’t imagined he would bring it with him on this trip. 

“When you told me about this trip, I guess I hoped it might mean you were ready for this,” Bryce told her, taking her hand before popping the ring box open, “Meredith Pierce, will you marry me?”

“Yes!!!!” Meredith said immediately, her eyes filled with tears. She had spent a lot of time afraid of the future, of commitment, but now standing here with this man who loved her in a way she had never imagined possible, she knew that love was worth the risk. 

She was all in. Forever.

**

June 18th- Father’s Day

“Are we going fishing or out for sushi?” Bryce asked the next morning as they lay cuddled up in bed. He grinned at Meredith’s frown, “8 told you, I check your holiday site. I am prepared.”

Meredith shook her head. She loved this man so much. “I actually had a more mainstream holiday in mind,” she told him, wiggling out of his arms to grab the card she had out on her night table the night before,

Bryce took it with a puzzled look, his eyes widening as he saw the Father’s Day card. “Mer?”

“Open it,” she encouraged, watching him carefully.

She watched as he carefully opened the card, memorizing the expression on his face as he spotted the sonogram she had tucked in there. 

“You’re pregnant?” He asked hesitantly, his eyes glued to the sonogram. 

“6 weeks,” Meredith confirmed, “it’s not why I planned this trip.  

I had this weekend planned long before that, it was just a nice little bonus.”

Or she hoped he would see it that way.

“I’m going to be a dad,” he said in awe and then he let the card fall from his hands as he grabbed her and kissed her deeply. She sank into the kiss, wondering if it was possible to be happier than she was at this moment. 

“I love you,” she told him when they finally broke apart for air.

“You are everything,” he told her, his hand moving to rest on her belly, “I can’t believe how happy you have made me.”

“Hopefully as  happy as you have made me,” she told him, “because I feel like I am so happy I might burst.”

“That makes two of us,” Bryce assured her and then he sighed, “although, there is one downside, I was really looking forward to that sushi—ooof.” He groaned as Meredith hit him with a pillow. “You’ll pay for that.”

He grabbed her by the waist and tackled her to the bed, both of them giggling, all holidays forgotten as they got lost in each other and the life they were building together. 

The End 

[unnuevosoltransformalarealidad]

No Place Like You

Pics found on Pinterest | Dividers from @firefly-graphics

Summary: The start of a new life, brings people that help you to make this start all better, and even some are there to brighten your days at the darkest moments Pairing: Misha Collins x Reader Squares filled: Mutual Pining for @supernatural-jackles Tell Me A Story Bingo // Divorce for @spnmixedbingo // Free Space for @spnfluffbingo // Laughing Together for @anyfandomfluffbingo // Warnings: Toxic past relationships, divorce, new beginnings, mutual pinning, jealousy, mental health. Word Count: 1.4k Rating: General Audience A/N: This is vaguely based on the Nicholas Sparks movie "Safe Heaven". I saw it the other day and felt inspired to write this. The timeline events are rushed, I know, but this is what my muse decided. Also this is my first time writing for Misha, so please be nice. Enjoy the reading!

After finally getting divorced from your abusive husband, you decided to get a new start in your life. You bought a ticket for the first bus that was leaving. in one of the rest stops, you felt a deep connection, it felt like the town was asking you to stay there. You “accidentally” miss the bus. since you didn’t have many belongings, you were able to stay there and get the fresh start you needed and wanted. You found a small motel and rented a single room. You had a place to stay, now, you needed to find a job. You knew it was gonna take time, but you needed to keep yourself positive.

While walking around town, you found a small diner, you went there to eat something, you left with a job there, you were their newest waitress. The universe was paying off all the bad you went through, and finally, your new life started.

You’ve been working as a waitress for a few weeks now and you were finally feeling at home. You’ve made friends with your coworkers and some regular clients, but there was someone who always sat at the same place, waiting for you. Every time you went to his table, he would give you a big smile and greet you with pet names. Brianna, one of your co-workers and first friend you've made, said that he sat there because he had a crush on you.

Could’ve been true? Did he have a crush on you? He was a very handsome man, he had very beautiful blue eyes, a big smile, and he seemed to have a great heart, he was always treating everyone with such love and care. Everyone at the diner loved him and with each passing day, you could see why.

On a particular day, this man was going to change your day. You were having a very awful day; your mood was bad and your mental health was in a bad place. You weren’t in the right headspace to deal with nosy customers, but because the customers weren’t the reason for your bad mood, you tried your best to keep it aside, but it was hard.

You were explaining to Brianna what was going on in your mind, when your exclusive customer came, you hadn't asked his name yet, you were too shy to do it. You grabbed the coffee pot and went to his table, “Hi beautiful” he greeted you with his perfect smile that made his eyes wrinkle, “Hello, sir. The usual?” you asked, avoiding any type of conversation. “Yes, darling. Are you okay?” He asked concerned, “I’m Misha, by the way” You didn’t have a tag name yet, so you had to tell him yours, even if you didn’t like the idea. “I’m Y/N, and yes, I’m fine” you almost whispered the last part.

“Are you sure?” he asked and you nodded. You had to be strong and not break in front of him. “I’ll be right back with your order sir,” you smiled, and when you were about to leave, he said “Misha,” you nodded again and repeated his name.

You asked Brianna to cover you for five minutes, you needed some fresh air, she accepted without hesitation. She knew what you were going through, she was the first friend you made after starting your new life there. You stayed outside for a few minutes and went back inside. You made it to the kitchen, grabbed Misha’s order, and took it to his table. You faked a smile at him, and handed him his order saying “enjoy your meal,” you turned around and left. After that, you decided to stick at the cashier, you didn’t have the energy to deal with people.

When Brianna went to gather the used plates, you saw that she had stayed talking a bit with Misha and she kept glancing at you. What was she telling him? Why did she need to keep looking at you while talking with him? When she was about to leave him, you heard her saying, “Don’t worry, it's all right” and she touched his shoulder. Was she flirting with him? Was she trying to make you feel jealous?

Wait, why would she want to make you feel jealous? You are not interested in Misha, you’ve just gotten out of a complicated divorce, you were hurt, you were still fighting the nightmares your ex left in you. You weren’t looking for love, but the way Misha treated you, burst your heart. Not even your ex-husband treated you like that when you were dating. Misha was special, and you felt somewhat attracted to that.

You kept your long face for the rest of your shift, not wanting to deal with people’s bullshit, you kept a straight face and not show any emotion. Yes, the regular customers could sense that you weren’t in your regular and happy mood, but they also knew to not mess up with you. By the end of your shift, the cook gave you some packed food for your dinner and you filled up your travel cup with coffee. You said your goodbyes and left.

It was around 6 PM when you were leaving, there was still some daylight so probably when you arrived at your motel’s room was going to be dark. You started to walk when you noticed Misha sitting on one of the outside benches, he definitely was waiting for someone. You weren’t in the mood to talk with him but you had to, he was on the bench that was in the direction you needed to take.

You walked by next to him and said your goodbyes. He looked up and called you, “hey Y/N, wait,” you turned around and said “what happened? are you waiting for someone and need company?” in a harsh tone, “yes, well, actually, I was waiting for you,” you gasped, did you hear him correctly? “Me?” he got up and signaled you to keep walking, “yes, I wanted to talk to you. I noticed you weren’t having a good day and wanted to know if everything was fine” he admitted, you sighed, this couldn’t be happening, you couldn’t tell him you were trying to figure out if you had feelings for him or not.

“Look, Misha,” you said stopping your track, “I really appreciate your concern but, I don’t want to be rude. There’s nothing you or anyone can do to fix me. I’m too messed up right now to think about anything.” Misha was taken aback by your outburst, his expression showed he was more confused now than before. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you, I’ll leave you alone,” he said hurt. It broke your heart seeing him hurt, you had screwed up a new friendship, relationship, or whatever, but you knew one thing, you needed to fix it. “Wait,” you said grabbing his hand. “I’m the one who needs to be sorry, you just wanted to help and I took it on you. I’m sorry,” he gave you a small smile and nodded but he didn’t let your hand go.

You stood there with him for a little until he took you to the bench where he was seated before. You stayed there talking with him, getting to know him a bit more. Your stomach got filled with butterflies after talking for an hour with him.

“Wait here,” you said pulling the packed food aside, you hadn’t noticed but there was a message there. “It’s enough food for two. Enjoy. Bri” you chuckled after reading Bri’s message. “What is it?” Misha asked and you showed him what Bri has written on your packed food, both of you started to laugh. When the laugh ended, you were nervous and to avoid getting awkward with him you asked “uh, would you like to have dinner with me?” Misha’s smile got even bigger than normal. “Yes, I would love to” he answered. You were about to get up when he stopped you. He leaned in, put a hand on your cheek, and pecked your lips, your heart stopped beating. Now, you were a goner. His gestures toward you made you weak in your knees. He got up and extended his hand, you took it and walked hand in hand with him to your motel room.

On the walk to your motel, you explained to him while you were still at a motel and not in a rented apartment. You also explained a bit about your past and why it was related to your bad mood. He was very understanding, he let you talk without interrupting. You haven’t felt at ease with a man in years. He definitely had a special place in your heart.

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[dianxiacantastemolecules]

Dear Mish

(I shouldn't probably address you like that. That nickname should be sacred - meant for the people who love you the most. But anyways it's you who taught us to break rules.)

I started watching supernatural for the very purpose of discovering Destiel. Yeah yeah, I have a thing for shows with complex relationships between men which are never resolved. I couldn't wait for the three seasons to finish so that I could finally watch cas enter through those barn doors, and into my life. And probably never leave again.

I could go on and on about how much I love Cas and how much that one angel means to me but this letter will probably not suffice. Besides this is about you, the closest we have to a real angel in this world.

I was never the one to swoon over celebrities and make my life about that one actor or actress who will never even know me. But you are something different. Mish, you are so much more than any celebrity. To me, and to all of us who just fell in love with the angel of the lord only to discover that the actor was so so much more.

I've been a fan for a fairly shorter period of time but that was all it took to start obsessing over the show, and of course, you. It's not about your perfect face or ocean blue eyes or even the tens of versions of your voice we've witnessed. It's in the little things, in the beautiful, beautiful smile of yours that is known for having such an effect on us. Believe me when I say looking at you smile makes us smile. It's in the jokes you make that have Jensen rolling on the floor, it's how you talk at the conventions- as if you're narrating an old story to even older friends, it's how you embrace your flaws and have no practical filter when it comes to saying things that matter.

It's how you're an idea. An inspiration. You're something good that reflects in never ending waves.

It's how you understand your fandom and respect them more than we even deserve. It's when you tell us to write our own ending, it's when you celebrate dean and cas having 100k fanfics written about them. It's when you give meaning to the spnfamily by sharing your innermost stories meant only for best friends. It's when you post cas with rainbow wings celebrating with pride the truth everyone tried to cover and deny but they couldn't. Because you, not very much unlike cas were the one real character that broke out of narration, that wrote his own story, that embraced the beauty of what people call love.

And thank you Mish, thank you for giving us Castiel. Characters will come and go, there will be new shows, some will be better some will be worse. The universe won't stop writing and celebrating fiction. But there will never ever be another Cas, another angel of the lord, who, by the mere mention of his name in a thousand different alternate universe versions can reduce us to tears, can make us happy from within, can make us beg to the lord to bring him back, sob his name if he gets hurt and scream with ecstasy when he finally gets the happiness he deserves. Castiel is here to stay. And never to leave.

Thank you for being you. The crazy weird chaotic energy of yours, the loving nature and the helping hands that have decided to fix this broken world one act of kindness at a time, for teaching us to be ourselves, letting us have fun while changing the world, for never giving a fudge to what people think, for inspiring us to be better, for naming a goddamn star after us, for being our best friend we don't fear saying anything to, for the legendary 15×18 confession scene we still haven't really processed. Thank you Misha. Thank you for everything.

A very Happy Birthday to you, the Dmitri Tippens Krushnic, the Overlord, the Misha Collins, the best friend of ours in all of the world. All I can wish for you is a bright and beautiful future and thank the lord and every other force of the universe that made it so that I exist at a time where you do too.

With Love,

spnfamily.

P.S. I Love You. And will, always.

P.P.S Even when you get old and saggy.

[castiel-left-his-mark-on-me]

I wish I knew what The Plot-verse Jen and Mish are doing for the wedding day <3 I like to think that Dani is having a small argument w Jen over what he should or should not do regarding the fan (and chad and samantha) wedding.

And just like that ... you have me writing more Cockles in The Plot-verse.

They got in late last night. Dani and the kids are still asleep, but Jensen is just too excited stay in bed. It’s been far too long since they’ve seen each other, and he can hear Misha hobbling around in the kitchen—something he really shouldn’t be doing just two days after a hip replacement.

But when he walks around the corner, seeing the man standing by the stove—skin glowing gold in the morning sun, Jensen waits just a minute longer before going over to bitch at him for being on his feet, because he doesn’t get to see this sight often enough. The man he loves … right here, finally within reach.

“Good morning” he says eventually, walking up behind Misha just as the man is reaching for the coffee pot. “What the fuck are you doing walking around?”

Misha laughs, leaning into Jensen as Jensen’s arms snake around his middle. “Makin’ coffee. I figured everyone in the house needs it after staying up so late.”

“I don’t think the kids do.”

“Not directly, no; but if they want me not to beat them with my crutches—they’ll want me to have my coffee.”

Jensen rolls his eyes and smiles. “They’ve been giving you grief?”

Misha finally rotates in Jensen’s arms, looping his own around the back of his neck before kissing him. “They’re animals.”

“Just like their dad” Jensen snickers, nuzzling Misha’s nose.

Misha scoffs in feigned offense. “I’m an angel … didn’t you know?”

“Yeah, yeah” Jensen muses. “Well, Angel. You need to go sit down. I’ll make the coffee.”

With a frown, Misha groans. “I don’t want to let go of you just yet. You’re quite an attractive crutch, and I need the support.”

Jensen squeezes the man tighter, breathing in the smell of him—a rather pungent smell. He probably hasn’t showered since the surgery; but he’s still his Mish. He’s still his home, his constant, and Jensen will never not want to fill his lungs with the man. “I’ll always let you lean on me, no matter what.”

Misha’s face softens, and his eyes widen as he looks him over. “Aw … what’s gotten into you? You’re so mushy today. I love it.”

Jensen finally tugs the man back, repositioning him so he’s braced against his side and Jensen can help him to one of the kitchen chairs. “Well, it is Valentine’s Day” Jensen chuckles, setting Misha down softly. “Also, I’ve missed you—a lot.” He leans in and kisses those pink, chapped lips, but when he pulls away again, Misha’s eyes are even wider.

“Shit.”

Jensen furrows his brow. “What?”

“It’s Valentine’s Day?”

Jensen chuckles. “Yeah. Why? You forgot?”

Misha swallows thickly and then nods.

Jensen rolls his eyes and then kisses him again. “Don’t worry about it. Just having you within kissing-distance is gift-enough for me.”

Misha half smiles but his gaze turns far-away, like he’s deep in thought.

“You didn’t get anything for Vicki, did you?” Jensen surmises after another moment later.

Misha eventually shakes his head.

Jensen straightens back out before turning towards the kitchen counter, knowing that the man will truly need coffee now if he’s going to start worrying so early in the morning, but maybe Jensen can help with that too. “It’s not a problem, Mish. I actually ordered flowers for both Dani and Vick… they should be getting here any minute. Just pull the card off and give her the other bouquet” he says, taking the coffee pot out of the machine and moving to the sink to fill it up with water. He raises his voice to talk over the noise. “And if you’re really worried about it—I also got two small things for Dee, so you can have one of them for Vick … I don’t know if she’d like it though. Vintage tees and headbands aren’t really her thing.” He shuts off the water and glances towards the man sitting at the table—who is now trying to stand up yet again. “Jeez—Mish!” He sets down the pot and scurries back over to the table to push Misha back into the chair. “Will you stop? I can handle things in the kitchen, alright? Just stay put!”

But Misha only reaches up, taking a fistful of Jensen’s t-shirt in his hand in order to yank him down and kiss him hard.

Jensen stumbles a little, but he catches himself on the edge of the table, quickly melting into the kiss a moment later, losing all comprehension the moment after that.

“You …” Misha starts when he finally breaks away, “are an extremely thoughtful man.” He kisses him again, harder still—slipping Jensen just enough tongue to make his body arch.

Jensen bites Misha’s lip as his sweatpants begin to tent; but he forces himself to pull away—knowing there’s nothing either of them can really do right now, and he really doesn’t need blue balls before noon. It’s a shame though, because he could spend all day tangled up with this man and never tire of it.

Misha smiles at him, face lighting up with many things that he could say, but doesn’t have to, because Jensen knows them all. “I love you—and thank you … for the flowers, that is. I’ll give those to Vicki; but you keep the gifts. We don’t normally do too much for Valentine’s day anyway; but I do usually get her flowers and cook her dinner.”

Jensen pulls away a little more and then leans his forehead against Misha’s, looking into those ocean-blues, feeling them calm him with their waves of warmth. “Well, that’s why we’re here, babe. To help you cook … help with the kids. Help you and Vicki manage while you heal. I got you, so just sit back and relax, alright?”

Misha nods against him, giving him one last peck before Jensen slips away to tend to the coffee—but Misha gives his ass a quick slap just before he’s out of reach. “Damn … I wish I could get on that.”

Jensen looks back over his shoulder and gives Misha a wink. “You and me both.”

***

The Coffee brewed and breakfast cooked—a filling array of waffles and eggs and spicy gourmet sausage that Misha had stockpiled in preparation of Jensen and Danneel’s visit. In fact, the man had loaded up on all the Ackles favorites—from beer, to games and toys for the kids, to all their favorite meals and snacks. He took care of just about everything they could possibly want or need; which makes the fact that he’s fretting over forgetting Valentine’s day all the more hilarious to Jensen.

“I can’t believe I didn’t get you anything!” Misha whines for the twentieth time today as he looks over the bracelet Jensen just gave him.

It was hand carved, ash and oak, with lines of black onyx inlayed between the woods, creating almost a braided effect. The craftsman said it was symbolic of two differing souls coming together to become something entirely new. And the onyx represented that new reality—black like the endless universe, reflecting all the light and love that shines within it. It was perfect, and Jensen felt that he was fated to find that bracelet—having accidently stumbled upon the tiny shop after taking a wrong turn when trying to find a gas station near their new cabin in Colorado.

They had decided to buy the place only a few months back—inspired by Misha’s purchase of Faith Ranch. So now, their families have two properties to go to be alone together. Faith Ranch and Serenity Lodge.

Yeah, the names are a little corny, but Jensen feels like they’re pretty fitting whenever they’re all finally together. The serenity he feels seeing all their kids playing … the faith he has in the future when he watches Misha and Danneel and Vicki all laughing with one another – it’s perfect; and he feels so very blessed that they have those places to run away to now. To be together and to be themselves.

In fact, the original plan was to have Misha and Vicki and the kids come up to Serenity to stay with them as Misha recuperated from his surgery, but with the winter storms and all the new frost hitting the area, Misha’s doctor said that Colorado was probably not the best environment for a man with stiff joints and limited mobility. So, Jensen and Danneel changed their plans and headed towards Washington, knowing that ultimately—it didn’t matter where in the world they were, as long as they were all together.

 The kids had all gotten up with the smell of breakfast, and once they shoveled in their food—they were all begging to go out back and play—meaning that the adults’ peaceful morning of gift giving and quiet coffee-drinking came to a speedy end. So, Danneel, Vicki and Jensen spent twenty minutes after breakfast trying to wrestle all the little ones into jackets and long pants and winter boots, which was quite a feat, even with three sets of hands, they were still outnumbered. Arrow and Zepp kept pulling off their jackets because they said they were too hot. JJ and Maison kept torturing West with annoying, made-up songs that all seemed to end with the same line “West smells like poop”; which ultimately made West retaliate with pokes and tickles and name calling—and that of course caused the girls to run away and scream at the top of their lungs, which of course meant that the three adults were chasing them all over the house—just trying to finish dressing them so they could finally kick them outside.

Misha sat back and laughed as he watched all the commotion go down, for once—seeming to enjoy the fact that he was immobile and unable to help.

Eventually however, the kids did get dressed and were set loose in the yard, leaving the grownups to watch them from the sunroom, drinking their second and third cups of coffee in somewhat relative-peace. The glassed-in space was warm and bright, and filled up with the scent of roses and gardenias. The two beautiful bouquets that Jensen had ordered (one of which, Misha did end up commandeering) are sitting on the coffee table between them all, adding just the right amount of color to the room.

Misha leaned against Jensen’s side as he scrolled on his phone; and Danneel and Vicki sat in the chairs across from them, talking about politics and lamenting over the current state of the senate, while Jensen just sat there quietly … smiling to himself because he hasn’t felt this happy in a while. His family is all together. The coffee Misha got was his favorite, and he has a belly full of waffles and sausage. This is quite possibly, the best Valentine’s Day he’s ever had.

“Fuck!” Misha yelps suddenly, bolting upright with a groan. “It’s our wedding today too?”

Jensen crinkles his eyes as he stares at the side of the man’s face, cracking a smile because—surely, the man is losing his mind. “What?”

Misha is still staring at his phone, scrolling furiously through—what Jensen thinks is Twitter; but Misha is moving too fast for him to be sure. “Apparently—it’s Dean and Cas’s wedding day today.”

Vicki and Danneel stop their conversation to gawk over at him too. “What?” They both ask again in unison.

Misha finally looks up from the screen, and then around to all three of them. “It’s our wedding day!”

And Jensen is rolling his eyes now. “We heard you the first time, Mish—but we’re gonna need you to explain it now.”

Misha shifts in his seat, wincing as his sore body twists in his hip-brace. “Remember that whole Chad-thing I was telling you about?”

“Chad? Chad who?” Danneel asks, and Vicki snickers to herself, obviously remembering something about all this, but Jensen is drawing a blank.

“Lindberg—he played Ash on Supernatural. I’ve only ever met him at conventions though. Nice guy.”

“Funny guy” Jensen adds on, starting to recall Misha mentioning the man at some point last week.

“Very funny—so funny in fact, he has written this whole additional arc for the show, set in Heaven, where he and Ellen are running the Roadhouse again, and of course … the fans are eating up.”

Jensen laughs. “I’d expect nothing less.”

Misha nods before continuing. “Yeah, well … it all started on Dean’s birthday … a party at the Roadhouse seemed to be the event. Both Chad and Samantha Ferris made this whole story out of it; but now, I guess the story went on to include Dean and Cas’s wedding … on Valentine’s Day, no less. Looks like Chad is going live in a little bit to talk to fans about it. He and Samantha are making it a whole thing. And now ‘DeanCasWedding’ is trending on Twitter.”

“That’s adorable” Vicki chuckles.

“So adorable! Oh my God! You guys should totally join in!” Danneel squeals.

That makes Jensen’s eyes go wide. “No way! Not gonna happen.”

Danneel’s smile somersaults into a pout. “But why not? You guys would break the internet!”

“Yeah, and that’s exactly why not. I’ve been pretty quiet about the finale; so, I don’t think the first time I really break my silence should be about our characters’ supposed marriage. That’s treading a really thin line in our contracts.”

“It’s just a silly story by one of the past actors. I don’t think it’s that big of a deal” Vicki offers, but now Misha is the one shaking his head.

“No, Jensen’s right. The simple act of us participating in something like that might be an invitation for the network to extend our NDA’s. As harmless as it would actually be to them and the canon of the show, our direct participation in it would raise too many eyebrows” Misha finishes, but now both the women are frowning.

“Well, maybe there’s something subtle you could do. Even if it’s just liking some of Chad’s tweets or something.”

“Maybe” Jensen offers, already thinking that that probably won’t happen; but who knows. He’s feeling rather soft today. If applied right, he can probably be pressured into just about anything.

“Mommy!” Arrow screeches, and the sound is immediately followed by Maison’s dubious laugh.

Both Vicki and Danneel look at one another before sighing and setting down their coffee cups.

“I’m sorry. Our daughter loves to torment those around her. She gets it entirely from her father” Vicki says, tossing a pointed look at her husband.

Misha gasps. “Who … me?” he mocks.

Danneel laughs as she looks at him adoringly. “It’s good-hearted torment, I’m sure.”

“Is there such a thing?” Vicki asks before moving around the chairs towards the screen door to the backyard.

Misha fakes a cry and then burrows his face into Jensen’s neck. “She’s so cruel, Jensen. Hold me!”

Jensen busts up laughing, but he does as he’s told, wrapping his arms tightly around the man’s body. “Shh—it’s okay, baby. I got you.”

Vicki smirks at the two of them nestled together on the couch. “You can have him. I’ll just take your wife off your hands.” And with that, she loops her arm with Danneel’s and pulls her out the door.

“Sounds good to me!” Danneel chirps, skipping along beside her as they go to check on the kids.

“Hey! I tend to like my wife!” Jensen yells, but Vicki just flits her hand in the air and waives him off.

“Hmm” Jensen grumbles. “Those two better not forget about us.”

Misha laughs, kissing his neck right after and it shocks goosebumps up all over Jensen’s body. “Don’t worry. They’ll remember we’re here as soon as the kids get too crazy.”

Jensen smiles. “True enough.”

They fall silent a moment, melting into each other’s warmth as the outside chill seeps in through the cracked back door, but the contrast only seems to make their closeness feel more intense.

“So—do you think you’ll do it?”

“Do what?” Jensen asks, mind already wandering towards all the future days that could be like this one. Their families—together, happy and full of love.

“Do you think you’ll actually like one of Chad’s tweets or whatever?” Misha finally pulls back a little so he can look Jensen in the eye.

Jensen sighs and then shrugs again. “I dunno, man. I’m just really hesitant about anything having to do with the show right now, even if it is just a silly makeshift fan-fiction put together by some of the past characters. I just don’t want to start picking at that scab, you know?”

Misha sighs as well, and then nods—leaning his head back onto Jensen’s shoulder as he scratches beneath his leg brace. “I get it. It should be harmless and all in good fun, but these things can snowball pretty quickly.”

“Exactly.”

“It is fun to think about though.”

“What’s that?”

“Dean and Cas—tying the knot.”

Jensen huffs a laugh before gathering Misha’s hand in his own. “Yeah. That would’ve been a fun scene to shoot.”

“Dean—all nervous at the end of the aisle…” Misha says dreamily.

“Cas, picking apart all the wedding traditions—talking about their archaic and barbaric origins” Jensen laughs.

“Charlie, punching him in the arm and telling him to stop killing the romance.”

Jensen nods. “She so would! She’d totally do that. Oh, and you know Bobby would be crying.”

“Oh yeah... and Sam would probably tear up a bit too.”

Now Jensen shakes his head. “Nah, Sam would just be making a smirky little bitch-face as Dean cried.”

Misha grins wide against Jensen’s shoulder. “Oh God … Dean would be bawling his eyes out.”

“He’d be marrying the love of his life … so yeah, of course he’d be bawling his eyes out!”

“You think Cas is the love of Dean’s life?” Misha asks, pulling back again suddenly to wonder at the side of Jensen’s face.

Jensen turns to him, a little surprised by the question. “Sure … don’t you?”

Misha’s face shifts into a cautious smile. “Well … I mean, I know that Dean is the love of Cas’s life. Obviously … the show admitted as much; but we never really talked about what you thought Dean’s take on the whole thing would be. We talked about the confession scene itself, and Dean’s reciprocation and how it was a long time coming for the show; but never what it might’ve actually meant for our two characters … if they ever had the chance to actually do something about it, that is.”

Jensen straightens out on the couch, being careful not to move too quickly and accidentally jostle Misha’s still fragile body. “Well …” he begins, trying to get back into Dean’s mindset, something that used to be as easy as flicking on a light switch for him; but now—with months and months having passed where he hasn’t been Dean Winchester, he’s finding it’s a little harder to get there, “I guess… since Dean is in Heaven now, he’d finally let his guard down. He wouldn’t be so hell bent on keeping his distance, because he’d know he finally doesn’t have to worry about losing everyone he loves; and that includes Cas.”

“But … a wedding?” Misha laughs; however, Jensen doesn’t miss the hopeful uptick to his voice.

“It’d take some doing … but yeah. I think Dean would eventually pop the question. He’d drive Cas around Heaven for a while, listening to some tunes, eating some good ass food. And then they’d find some beautiful lake somewhere, sit on Baby’s hood … and Dean would just know, ya know? So, he’d throw his arm around Cas’s neck and say ‘Cas—what the fuck are we doin’? We should just get hitched already’ and then he’d kiss him like there’s no tomorrow.”

Misha smiles, eyes scrunching up with his grinning cheeks. “I suppose in Heaven, the concept of tomorrow isn’t really a thing.”

“Yeah, time works different in Heaven … isn’t that what the script said?”

“Something like that” Misha mutters, inching himself up to reposition the leg he has propped against the table. “So … we’d be super corny and get married on Valentine’s Day?”

“Why not?” Jensen laughs. “Dean does enjoy a good Rom-Com moment. And we all know he’s about as corny as they come.”

“True” Misha chuckles. “Well, in that case …” He sits up straight and sobers his face, narrowing his eyes a little before he turns a serious gaze in Jensen’s direction. “Happy Wedding Day, Dean” he says—in his deepest, raspiest Cas-voice.

Jensen starts to laugh, but quickly stops himself so he can get into character—half smiling, looking away … bashful, but still intense. “Back at ya, Cas.” He clears his throat as he looks around the room, trying to think of what Dean would say next … but then it hits him. Dean wouldn’t say anything. Without a second thought, Jensen leans forward and reaches out towards one of the bouquets, pulling out a long strand of Baby’s Breath … quickly breaking it in half and twisting the stem around itself, finally tucking the ends between one another to make a small, vined circle. And then, turning slowly in his seat, he grabs Misha’s—Cas’s left hand and holds it between them, slipping the make-shift ring onto his finger.

Misha looks down at it a moment, breaking character as his voice cracks in a sigh; but as he looks back towards Jensen—a slight sheen of tears in his eyes, he falls back into the angel’s grace, eyes seeming to glow blue in the morning sun, shoulders squaring on the wings of the day. “I do” he says raggedly, sounding choked up, but still like a tried-and-true angel of the lord.

“Me too” Jensen rumbles, voice just as deep before finally leaning in to kiss his angel’s lips; but soon enough—their Heaven falls away, as do Dean and Castiel, leaving just the two of them, real and mortal and alone in the sunroom of Misha’s home.

A flowered ring on one hand.

Each other’s hearts in the other.

Two families growing together in the grass and sun.

And a real-life paradise, alive and thriving all around them.

Yes … Jensen thinks, this is indeed the best Valentine’s Day he’s ever had.

[kickingitwithkirk]

Greetings from Austin pt. III

Pairing: Alpha!Jensen Ackles x Alpha!Jared Padalecki x Omega!OFC

Summary: Jensen and Jared are at odds over a monumental decision that changes their lives in a way they couldn’t have envisioned.  

WC: 3825

Warnings: a/b/o, bisexuality, biphobia, homophobia, angst, cursing, self doubt, depression/anxiety, married life/disagreements, medical stuff, sexual dysfunction, infertility/surrogacy

*flirting, m/m oral sex, Jensen’s insecurities are coming out, Jared gets arrested, both get counseling

A/N: This part consists of several time jumps over four month period.

A/N II: Hey, sorry took me a way longer to get done than planned, rewrote Oct 23 a dozen times alone and hoping makes sense, trying to flesh out characters more and has some stuff that plays into story line in later parts.

Part II

Masterlist

@winchesterandbeyondbingo​​​​​​ square filled-Jensen Ackles

*Series Inspired by this art.

*no beta-all mistakes are mine

September 8th

7:30 am

Jensen was sitting in the makeup chair clenching his extra strong coffee container to help warm his hands. He’d spent a second, uncomfortable night in his trailer on location as Vancouver was having an unusual cold snap this time of year and with the covid restrictions the director decided that everyone needed to stay on site.

While he wasn’t happy about the weather, missing his own personal heater but at the same time grateful for a brief break from Jared now that they were heading towards the next phase of starting their family.

Jensen jokingly said they needed a code name since they were planning on keeping their plans a secret, even from their families, until the pups were born, playfully suggesting a cartoon from their childhoods.

Of course with Jared’s weird sense of humor, he loved it and started throwing ideas like operation: pound puppies.

“Penny for your thoughts.” Frieda said as she applied a concealer under his eyes to hide the dark smudges from not sleeping well.

“Huh?”

“You asked about my new job and haven’t heard anything I’ve said, wanna talk about it?”

“Sorry, not focusing very well today.”

“Yeah, we’re all feeling out of sorts with this being the last couple days.”

Jensen couldn’t believe he was down to his last two days of filming.

“Too bad this virus messed everything up, it would’ve been a hell of a send off if everybody could have been here.”

Alex and Misha had left right after they’d finished but Jim Beaver was back for the ending. It was only right for Bobby Singer to be there at the end, having been such a pivotal character in the brothers lives.

Frieda continues chatting about random things while finishing his makeup. A PA stuck his head in calling Jensen to the set. He stepped out of the trailer and smiled seeing his Baby sitting near the building being used as the exterior of Harvelle's Roadhouse.

***

September 12th

“Jen, I’m taking out the bags,” Jared calls out seconds before the apartment's front door shut.

Jensen was doing one last check around the place for any forgotten anything. Satisfied, he walked into the living room containing neatly marked boxes ready to be shipped back to Texas, relieved they had downsized from the big house Jared had years ago.

He stopped to gaze out the picture window when a pair of strong arms wrapped around his waist, molding his back to the muscular chest of his mate, who rested his chin on his shoulder quietly saying, “I’m gonna miss this view.” Jensen hummed in agreement tipping his head back as Jared nuzzled his neck.

“We need to get going if we’re gonna make Seattle by seven,” Jared softly muttered as they’d stood there for a few heartbeats longer before releasing him. They walked to the door and Jensen turned once more to gaze out the window at the view of Vancouver.

***

September 21st

“This has been a great trip but man, I’ll be glad to be in our own bed tonight.” Jared remarks as they drive past a green highway sign saying Austin 312.

“Can’t wait,” Jensen drowsily says having not slept much the last couple days. They had decided to road trip it back to Texas, stopping at a few places they had wanted to visit for awhile.

Jared somehow managed to finagal, okay so his mind numbing blow job combined with those lethal long fingers that always makes Jensen agree to anything got him a couple extra days in southern Colorado.

Jensen enjoyed the beautiful scenery and hiking in the mountains but hated camping out. Well, it wasn’t technically roughing it the way Jared liked but still.. a frigging yurt in late September?

Oy vay, what he did for love.

The sound of Jared singing along to some classic country song on the radio as he drove finally put Jensen completely out.

***

October 23rd

Turning from the open fridge with a puzzled expression on his face, Jared senses the same vague something he’s felt God knows how many times in the last couple months.

Shutting the door he walked over to the island counter where his husband was seated pushing his unfinished dinner around on his plate.

“Jen, what’s going on? Are you worried about the implantation? Dr. Rodgers said the embryos were healthy and optimistic the surrogate took this first try.”

What Jensen wants to ask, the question that’s plagued him since that day in August choosing their Omega surrogate...how the hell does he phrase it without upsetting Jared?

“Did you choose her because you knew she’d be the one I’d pick?”

Jensen slapped his hand over his mouth, eyes wide, disbelieving he blurted it out.

Jared worked to find a response squeaking an actual squeak before he could get control over his vocals, “That’s what I’ve been sensing!” Gripping the edge of the counter with his big hands, “Are you seriously going there again? I was honest about our interactions when I realized she was the one I knocked down at the clinic and FYI, you weren’t exactly in full control either Alpha!”

Jensen clenched his teeth at being reminded his inner need to be in control at all times slipped.

“I’ve racked my brains trying to figure it out how to ask something like that without upsetting you!” Jensen yells getting up and pacing around the kitchen.

Jared huffed, “So all this time instead of talking to me, you’ve conjured up some..”

“For the last two years I’ve gotten the sense you feel somethings missing, kept telling myself it’s your unfulfilled biology. But ever since you meet that Omega you’ve been.. I can’t explain it and now I’m second guessing our marriage Ja....” his rant abruptly cut off.

Jared’s eyes were glowing red, pinning him with an eerie wolf expression, the intensity disconcerting him. “I chose you, my husband, my soulmate, my everything!“ The words should have been reassuring but Jared’s voice was pitiless, something Jensen's never heard pass from his lips before.

Jared took a deep breath and with normalcy returning said, “I love you Jensen and I thought you understood, for me, in my mind, both of us having pups with the same donor means my offspring won’t be seen as just step relations but will grow up having strong familial ties with JJ, Arrow and Zeppelin.”

Jensen started to speak when a low, reverberating growl from Jared warning him not to interrupt.

“I consciously listened to my inner wolf when it came to choosing the person who is biologically the Om of our children and I,” Jared emphasizes tapping his chest with his long index finger, ”have no regrets but apparently you do.” Taking a deep breath Jared drops a non sequitur, ”The dogs need to be fed,” and walks away.

At the sound of Jared’s SUV leaving Jensen’s legs gave out and he drops to the floor curling up in a fetal position wrapping his arms over his head. Arlo and Koda laid down, one on each side, cocooning him between them.

***

Thanksgiving

“The kids are in a tryptophan coma,” Jensen announces as he walks in through the kitchen's back door. He had followed Danneel home afterwards helping get JJ and the twins cleaned up and put to bed, “they’ll be out till Monday.”

“Good, cause I’m dead on my feet,” Jared replies yawning while loading the dishwasher. It had been their turn to host the holiday with Danneel, the kids, Clif, Jared’s siblings and their broods.

“I told you to wait and I’d help finish the cleanup when I got back.” Jensen said as Jared started the machine.

“I figured you’d wanna stay awhile and be too tired and I didn’t want to deal with it tomorrow. All that’s left is to put the trash and recycling out, could you grab it?”

“On it,” Jensen picked up the bags walking around the side of the house dropping them into their designated receptacles.

When he came back in Jared was switching off the lights downstairs. They made their way up to the bedroom taking turns in the bath getting ready for bed.

Jensen was sitting with his back against the headboard checking his messages when Jared drops heavily next to him, “I plan on sleeping for the next three days.” He mutters resting his head against Jensen’s shoulder.

“Sounds good to me babe, I’m glad we didn’t schedule anything extra this weekend, be nice to spend some time alone.” He finishes wiggling his eyebrows.

“Hmm, do you remember last year's Thanksgiving?”

Jared closed the kitchen pantries door, pushing Jensen against it seductively lowering his fox slanted eyes huskily whispering, “I’m so fucking horny I need my dick you now.”

“Dude, we’re re in my sisters...“

“..you’ll have to be quiet,” Jared dove in for a deep, dirty kiss, grinding against Jensen until he was begging to be fucked.

“You’re the one who got us busted..oh fuck Jensen..so fucking tight..fuck..not gonna last..then later I get Mac saying it sounded like your dick...”

“Okay..buuut,” Jared tilts his head slowly running his tongue up the column of Jensen’s neck, “you gotta admit,” hand slipping under his sleep shirt, “our sex life,” long fingers tip toe up the smooth, freckled chest, pads teasing his left nipple as Jared nibbles on his earlobe, ”is never boring.”

Jensen groans, dropping his arm, still clinching the phone, tipping his head to expose more of his neck to Jared’s wondrous lips, enjoying the scratch of his short beard.

“I thought you were sleeping the next three days.”

Jared answers by removing his hand and straddling his husband's thick thighs taken the phone placing it on the nightstand and starts nibbling along the other side of Jensen’s sensitive neck, working his way to his slightly raised claim mark flattening his tongue licking the ultra sensitive spot that always drives his Alpha wild.

Jensen slides his hands up Jared’s back finding a grip in his shortened hair, unhappy about how much he’s cut off for Walker, unable to tangle his thick fingers into the soft tresses like he used to.

Finding a purchase he pulls hard making Jared groan at the pleasurable sensation tips his head back till it’s the perfect angle for Jensen to run his tongue across those candy pink lips, teasing them open to grant him access, continues teasing, alternating between caressing Jared’s tongue with his and sucking on his lips.

Moaning, Jared rocks his hips seeking friction, breaks their kissing long enough to work Jensen's sleep shirt off. They end up wrestling a few moments before Jared tosses it as Jensen’s lips attack his more desperately.

Tapping Jared’s thigh, Jensen rolls them kneeling between sleep pant clad legs watching as Jared reaches up gripping the strategically placed bar in their custom made headboard with both hands, his pecs flexing in anticipation of what’s to come.

Not breaking eye contact Jensen bends forward, his lips a hair's breadth from Jared’s, slowly slides backwards hovering, caressing the acres of golden skin beneath him with only his warm breath, pausing to hook his fingers in the pants waistband and pulling them with him as he continues journeying south.

Slowly making his way back north he leaves wet, open mouth kisses along the now naked, extra long, muscular legs he loves, sucking on the insides of both thighs, nipping hard enough to leave marks before arriving at his designated stop.

He hasn’t even touched Jared’s beautiful cock yet it’s fully engorged, resting against his flat stomach vigorously leaking precome. Jensen dips his tongue into his bellybutton lapping up the liquid collecting in it, cause fuck, he’s loves how more sweet than salty Jared’s always tasted.

Hips rolling Jared rubs his cockhead against Jensen’s tongue and he kitten licks the dribbling slit before resting his head on Jared’s lower stomach and wrapping his lips around the velvety head.

Shifting his grip on the bar Jared’s makes nonsensical noises, toes curling at the mixed sensations of his mates silky beard tickling his lower regions while sucking on his cockhead, alternates swirling his tongue over the nerves underneath and teasing his slit sending spikes of pleasure radiating through him.

After all these years Jared’s still amazed at Jensen’s knowledge of his body, his ability to keep him on the edge of not enough for however long he’s in the mood to play.

“..pleease...need to cum...got to..so fucking..uhh..Alpha!”

Raising up on a forearm Jensen starts bobbing up and down his shaft, pausing briefly on each downward pass, working his throat open to take Jared further in until he’s nose deep in dark, trimmed pubic hair. Holding his mate's substantial cock in his throat swallows around him as Jared’s knot inflates, pushing his jaws apart till it’s too much.

Letting the knot slip out from between his plump lips Jensen wraps a hand firmly around it and starts vigorously bobbing drawing out a litany of obscene noises, feels Jared’s balls drawing up and backs off swallowing the warm, thick, spurting liquid.

Leisurely licking until Jared hissed, too sensitive for anymore kisses the tip one last time crawls back up the bed searching for his pillow and face plants on it.

“Dude, you’ve finally sucked out my last brain cell.”

Purring deep in his chest, Jensen gives Jared a self satisfied smirk, who mutters, “wasn’t trying to give you a bigger head.”

Rolling onto his side Jensen displays his turgid cock needing attention, “okay, he’s the bigger head,” Jared concedes reaching down running his fingers over the weeping tip, wetting them with precome spreads it over the shaft firmly fisting Jensen’s pulsing thickness, moving his hand up and down excruciatingly slowly.

“So,” his honeyed voice lowers an octave watching Jensen dissolving into a breathy mess, “how does he want me?”

Jensen opens his mouth to answer when a phone rings. Glaring over his shoulder, “not mine,” he growls. Still stroking him Jared stretches for his, “it’s the clinic..hello? Dr. Rodgers, hey, how are you sir?” He lets go sitting up against the headboard.

Why’s the doctor calling them at such an odd time, on a holiday no less?

Jared's brow wrinkles before he turns to Jensen, eyes sparkling breaks out his wondrous smile making his dimples pop.

“Jensen, she’s pregnant!”

Jared's practically bouncing on their bed like he’s on a massive sugar high discussing what comes next with the doctor. Jensen feels his erection rapidly diminishing, gets up heading into the bath and turns on the shower.

Climbing in he crosses his arms against the far wall, resting his forehead against them closing his eyes as hot water bounces across his broad shoulders.

Jensen knows he should be elated. Jared’s getting the pup (or pups) he’s desired for years and the possibility of being a father himself again. Instead, his heart seized up in conflict.

***

After that god awful argument in October he ended up at Josh’s, who confessed his mate and him were seeing a counselor because they were having marital issues too. Spending the night drinking and reflecting Jensen came home the next morning to a still angry Jared cause he didn’t know where the fuck his husband was all night.

Filling him in about his talk with Josh, Jared seemed somewhat mollified but a few nights later...

Walker star Jared Padalecki arrested near the one year anniversary of Stereotype bar altercation.

· Jared Padalecki was arrested once again in Austin, Texas, early Sunday morning on one count of public intoxication…

When he got released Jared sat Jensen down pleading with him to sit in on his next therapy session, saying they couldn’t keep going on like this, it was tearing him apart.

He wants..no..needs Jensen to completely open up, stop trying to protect him and discuss what’s going on in his head, what he’s really feeling.

Jared’s therapist started off informing both of them he wasn’t a marriage counselor but after a brief conversation with Jared knew the situation was having a detrimental impact on his mental health.

He listened to them separately, then together, about their observations and thoughts on each other’s behaviors came up with a hypothesis:

Since Jared’s last depressive episode, his random thoughts/emotions were feeding more into Jensen’s deep seated insecurities over his mate’s open, flirtatious personality and how he perceives others attraction/interactions to him.

And now Jared’s inner wolf is demonstrating an intense attraction to an Omega, something never encountered before with past preferences in Beta females, with this new dynamic Jensen didn’t know how to handle it.

Jensen opened and closed his mouth several times sputtering before saying this was complete bullshit and stormed out.

***

Lost in thought Jensen didn’t notice his husband stepping into the open shower stall until his considerable frame was blocking the water, Jared’s voice drew him out of his musings.

“I can hear you thinking clear in the other room.”

Cupped Jensen’s face between his large hands he gazed into those spring colored eyes that captured his heart the moment he looked into them years ago, “Hey, no matter what happens next, we’re good.”

***

December 16th

Jared was sitting in his chair chatting with Lindsey and Keegan while the crew was finishing setting up for the next scene when his phone rang. He didn’t recognize the number but excuses himself, stepping away for some privacy answering.

“Hey, everything okay?” Lindsay asked after he hung up, concerned by the visible tension rolling off the big Alpha.

“Umm..I don’t know, I need to make another call...” Jared said, waving the phone, “yeah, let us know if you need anything.” Keegan says and Jared nodded his thanks.

The phone rang three times, “Hey Clif, I need a favor.”

***

December 19th

Clif pulled the SUV into the parking lot, “Are you sure this is the right place?” Jared inquires looking around taking in the old motel located in a very questionable area of Austin.

“This is the name the guy mentioned.” Clif replied, getting out heading for the office. Couple minutes later he climbed back in, “the manager said the laundry out back.” He started the vehicle and drove to the rear of the property.

Clif got out again and knocked on the building's door. An older Hispanic woman answered engaging him in a brief conversation before stepping back inside.

Clif nodded to Jared and as he got out of the vehicle that piquant scent hit him seconds before the door reopened. The person he’d spent days searching for froze in the doorway upon seeing him.

***

December 22nd

Jensen, claiming out of the Uber, grabbed his bag thanking the driver, walked up the front stone pathway relieved to be home from L. A. after a hopefully final costume fitting for his new role as Soldier Boy, this flying back and forth every week for the last couple months had gotten old real quick and he was looking forward to enjoying the holidays at home.

Jared’s parents were coming tomorrow and staying for a few days as was Danneel and their pups. Josh said he was still planning on dropping by a few hours Christmas Day since he and Mac were scheduled to spend most of the holiday with their parents.

Jensen felt that mixture of anger and sadness he got thinking about his parents. He was raised in their church and though he never believed in it, respected their choice.

Too bad they couldn’t reciprocate.

***

Alan and Donna belonged to an ultra conservative church. The foundations of child rearing was to be found in the good book and in the Ackles household-spare the rod, spoil the child-was gospel.

When they were growing up neither parent was the physically or emotionally demonstrative type, only showing their offspring a reserved affection, especially in public.

The saving grace was their Beta nanny who gave them unconditional love, especially Jensen, who was shy as a child already knowing he was different from his siblings. She instilled the confidence in them to discover who they truly were inside and encouraged Jensen to come out before moving to California.

Shortly after graduating he told his family about his bisexuality and his boyfriend was moving to L.A. with him.

Alan and Donna tried to stop him. He was to go to their pastor and confess his transgressions, beg forgiveness for his sins against the church and its teachings, threatening to pull the agreed upon six month financial support while he auditioned for parts before going to college if it didn’t work out.

Jensen refused, packed up, took his boyfriend and left. He got his first break shortly after and quickly learned Hollywood didn’t care what his sexual orientation was as long as he kept it behind closed doors.

His management agency decided early on to promote Jensen as the good guy/boyfriend type. They also set him up on dates to events with many up and coming female artists of the time. He had no problem playing along when he wasn’t actually dating a woman.

His big break came on the CW. After co-starring in a couple series for the network he was offered the chance to be a lead in a new series created by Eric Kripke.

At the audition he met former Gilmore Girls heartthrob, Jared Padalecki, flashing his infectious smile, dimples for days and the most beautiful, incredible color shifting eyes Jensen’s ever seen, he was done for.

Jensen might not have his biological parents in his life anymore but his now in-laws, the complete opposite of the Ackles, helped fill that hole.

It’s easy to see where Jared’s personality comes from. His Om, Sherrie, is overly affectionate, excessively physical and verbal with everyone she considers family, biological or not.

The first time he accompanied Jared home on a holiday break Jensen was literally bowled over by the five foot nothing Omega and instantly became part of her brood.

***

Barley getting the front door open Jensen is hit with the piquant scent of orange blossoms and spices he couldn’t quite place.

Dropping his carry-on bag in the foyer he followed the scent further into the house. Arlo sat up near the large picture windows facing the backyard where he and Koda are napping and gets up coming over to greet him.

“Hey big guy, where’s daddy at?” Jensen asked rubbing around his ears like he liked having thought Jared would still be on set before the holiday break.

He heads towards the kitchen where the scent seems to be coming from, “Babe is that coffee shop back open, what’s it called, has those sweet rolls you're obsessed with..” he abruptly stopped and blinks not believing what was in front of him.

More accurately who was in front of him.

“Babe is in his office and dinner will be ready in twenty.”

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?”

***

tbc

GFA: @babypink224221 @waywardjoy​ @let-me-luve-you​ @all-4-wincest

SPN: @donnaintx​ @lyarr24

Sam/Jared @idreamofplaid​

Dean/Jensen: @flamencodiva​

[destieltropecollection]

Destiel Trope Collection 2020 Day 17: Hurt/Comfort & Whump

the time has come | @elizaeverafter

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 1068 Main Tags/Warnings: no archive warnings apply, non-graphic pet death, angst with a happy ending, hopeful ending, established relationship, married castiel/dean winchester, emotional hurt/comfort Summary: The second Dean walked into their home, he should’ve picked up on the fact that something was wrong. Looking back on it, it was so silent that it was suffocating. There was an unnatural stillness, like their house knew something bad had happened and was trying not to involve itself.

Beautiful | @ialwayscomewhenyoucall

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 1367 Main Tags/Warnings: human!cas, hurt/comfort, injured cas, first kiss Summary: “How long has he been sitting there?” Dean starts; he’d been watching Cas and hadn’t heard Sam behind him. “Five hours.” Dean practically spits out the words. “He won’t eat. He won’t move to a more comfortable chair. He won’t even take his damn pain pills. And he can’t tell me that doesn’t hurt, I know what a broken collar bone feels like. He’s just so--” ***** In which Cas, now fully human for several months, has been injured, and Dean has to Use His Words to comfort his friend.

Teardrops For You | @envydean

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 1500 Main Tags/Warnings: Grief, Character Death, Established Relationship, Funerals, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Dean and Cas holding each other, Sadness, slight fluff, Angst, Car Accidents, Nightmares, Cuddling, Holding, Crying, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting Summary: The accident killed her and left Dean alive and emotionally broken. He's a disgrace. His best friend is dead and he can't even cry for her.

Soup & Syrup | @suckerfordeansfreckles

Rating: General Word Count: 1548 Main Tags/Warnings: best friends to lovers, getting together, sick Cas Summary: Cas started feeling sick two days ago, throat raw and hurting, every part of his body in pain as if he’ll burn up with fever any second. Then he had to cancel his and Dean's weekly study date in the library this afternoon, to stay home and take a quick nap that accidentally ended up four hours long and left him groggy and sweaty and weird. Dean has been sending him texts, five since he cancelled earlier, and as soon as Cas felt awake and present enough to respond, he called. This is where they are now, around 1 a.m. on a Saturday. He didn’t really stop to look at the clock before he called Dean, but — well. He was just hoping Dean would be awake, maybe out with friends. He was just hoping that maybe, maybe, Dean would come by and dote a little on him. Just because having his best friend around always makes him feel better. Not because he craves Dean’s presence, his palm on Cas’ forehead and his hands tucking him in beneath his blanket. Absolutely not.

The Admission | @deservetobesaved

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 1720 Main Tags/Warnings: season 13, all the feelings Summary: Castiel finds out Dean threatened to kill Jack. He also finds out how broken Dean was when he died. So, naturally, he confronts him about it. A sort of fix-it coda, in or after 13x06.

Knowing | @unexpecteddreamz

Rating: General Word Count: 2013 Main Tags/Warnings: Castiel & Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester, Demon Dean Summary: Of all the things Castiel might have expected to see, this was the last... It might well be the last thing he ever sees! Castiel is ""Always willing to bleed for the Winchesters"". Sam doesn't know how to fix what is broken. Dean is having nightmares. How did everything go so wrong so fast?

The Snow's Captives | SargentMom573 (AO3)

Rating: Mature Word Count: 2126 Main Tags/Warnings: Blizzards & Snowstorms, Sick Castiel, Caretaker Dean, Cabin Fic Summary: Dean was not going to make it alive down the mountain in a week’s time. Why? Because Cas was going to kill him, that’s why.

Skin Wars | @cr-noble-writes

Rating: General Word Count: 2319 Main Tags/Warnings: Angst, Artist!Dean, Model!Cas, body painting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cas protecting Dean from himself, shy!Dean, introvert!dean, Baby, graffiti artist!charlie, artist!Balthazar, art critic!Crowley, TV host!Anna, Skin Wars AU Summary: Dean, a traditionally trained artist, is competing for $100,000 in the reality body painting TV show, Skin Wars. He’s lucky enough to get paired with a friend as his model, Cas, for a particularly personal challenge. Dean feels his painting isn’t up to snuff, but what will the judges think?

Take Me Home | @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 2683 Main Tags/Warnings: Mentions of Rape, Mentions of Sexual Abuse, Non-con/Rape outside of Castiel/Dean Winchester, Hurt Dean Winchester, Protective Castiel, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, TW: Mentions of Non-con/Rape Summary: “I want to go home.” Dean let out, in a strangled voice. “Of course -” Cas reached for Dean’s hand, prepared to fly them away. Dean pulled away his hand, and rested his head backwards, against the seat. It seemed impossibly long before he finally asked. Unsure, as if somehow he still felt like Castiel could deny him anything. “Could you drive?”

Cold Comfort | @noiproksa

Rating: General Word Count: 3232 Main Tags/Warnings: Sharing Body Heat, Hypothermia, Huddling for Warmth, Cuddling & Snuggling, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Banter Summary: Dean and Cas are trapped in a room with temperatures well below zero. When even sharing vessel heat doesn’t seem to help anymore, they need to do whatever it takes to keep each other alive. (Intended as gen, but can be read as Destiel pre-slash.)

Exodus | @spnsmile

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 3365 Main Tags/Warnings: Explicit, noncon, hurt/ comfort Summary: Endverse!Dean comes back alive. He comes back to the camp to find he was gone for almost a month and that Castiel now serves a different captain. Like hell Dean Winchester will let that happen.

save that light | @specsofwings

Rating: Mature Word Count: 4779 Main Tags/Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Assassin Dean Winchester, Human Castiel, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Whump, Kidnapping, Implied/Referenced Brainwashing, Blasphemy/Religious Imagery and Symbolism, Crucifixion, Major Character Injury, Heavy Angst, Angst With a Happy Ending, Trauma, Healthy Relationship, Hurt/Comfort Summary: He’s alive, he’s alive, he’s alive— Dean isn’t sure if it’s his brain, if he’s speaking aloud, if it’s Jody, next to him in the car, but he’s alive, Castiel is alive, and then there is darkness.

The Empty's Curse | @cloverhighfive

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 5380 Main Tags/Warnings: major character death, angst, fluff Summary: Dean is dying and there is no getting out of it this time. After a round of goodbyes from friends, Castiel takes Dean on one last ride.

Shiver | @nickelkeep

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 5714 Main Tags/Warnings: Modern with Magic, Witchcraft, Getting Back Together, Blizzards and Snowstorms, Car Accident, Snowed In, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, NSFW Summary: In desperate need of his journal to complete a spell, Dean braves a snowstorm to return to the cabin - and the man - left behind. Can a freak accident repair what's been damaged? Or will their lack of communication push Dean and Cas apart forever?

Six Feet Under Water | zaphodsgirl (AO3)

Rating: Mature Word Count: 7638 Main Tags/Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending Summary: This story is inspired by the amazing art of dragonpressgraphics, accompanied by this prompt: "Can be canon or AU (though Canon preferred - see below why) where Cas almost drowns and either Dean witnessed it or rescues him - would love a fic where Cas then has to deal with fear of drowning afterwards - maybe Dean too has nightmares about Cas drowning because of the same experience (bonus if references are made to season 6/7 where Cas walked into the water because of the Leviathans). Loads of angst more than okay as long as story has happy ending"

This Path Is Paved With Kitty Litter | @navajolovesdestiel

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 8392 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe, Grieving Castiel (Supernatural), Caring Dean Winchester, Veterinary Assistant Dean, Deanna The Kitten, Explicit Sexual Content Summary: The man moved from cage to cage, petting each cat in turn. Dean could hear his sigh from where he was standing. Dean walked over to him. The guy looked up at Dean and again, his eyes made Dean’s knees weak. “Hey, guy, you spend a lot of time with these cats. You thinking about adopting one?” The look on the guy’s face went from sad to stricken. “Uh… n-no, I’m… I’m just looking at them.” The look made Dean’s chest hurt.

After the Fallout | @cr-noble-writes

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 8832 Main Tags/Warnings: Post-Apocalypse, Post-Nuclear War, some body horror, Major Character Injuries, Nightmares, Mutants, Minor Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, Smut, Angst, Conspiracy, top!dean, Bottom!Cas Summary: Its been years since the nuclear catastrophe that decimated the world. From the moment Dean Winchester stepped foot on the surface again, he’s been running from mutant creatures that want to kill him. When will it end?

I'm Thankful I get to Leave | @sheinthatfandom

Rating: Mature Word Count: 11079 Main Tags/Warnings: thanksgiving dinner, alternate universe- human, dysfunctional family, uncomfortable topics, red flags, emotional manipulation, emotional incest, homophobia, ableism, racism, bad parent mary, bad parent john, bobby used to be married to mary Summary: Screw you Columbus now we have to eat at Mary’s pretending to not be the Jerry Springer version of the Brady Bunch instead of getting ready for Christmas.

The Last Thing I Wanted | @nickelkeep

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 11492 Main Tags/Warnings: AU - Fantasy, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Whump, Prince!Dean, Concubine!Cas Summary: When Castiel is grievously wounded during an unsanctioned battle, it's all Prince Dean can do to make sure he lives the rest of his life comfortably. However, due to the archaic laws of Terra, Castiel is too lowborn to hold lands, deeds, or titles. What better way to solve an archaic problem than with a just-as-antiquated solution?

Healing an Angel | @noiproksa

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 12017 Main Tags/Warnings: Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Castiel, Canon Compliant, Friendship, Team Free Will, Wing Grooming, Aftermath of Torture Summary: Cas has been captured by shapeshifters who have been torturing him for weeks. The aftermath is not pretty, but Dean will do anything to get his angel through this and get him to trust them again. To make matters worse, the mastermind behind Cas’ capture is still alive. Will they be able to keep him from coming after Cas again?

Cloned to Perfection | @fangirlingtodeath513

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 16298 Main Tags/Warnings: Castiel/Dean Winchester,Castiel (Supernatural),Dean Winchester,Sam Winchester,Bobby Singer,Charlie Bradbury,Cain (Supernatural),Alastair (Supernatural),John Winchester,Alternate Universe - Future,Marine Castiel (Supernatural),John Winchester Being an Asshole,Canon-Typical Violence,Human Experimentation,Government Experimentation,Genetic Engineering,Clones,Gun Violence,Shooting Guns,Fugitives,Hacking,Government Conspiracy,Blow Jobs,Come Swallowing,Interrogation,Truth Serum,Needles,Brief Mentions of Torture (Not TFW),Alternate Universe - No Monsters,Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss,Castiel/Dean Winchester First Time,Hand Jobs,Angst with a Happy Ending,Happy Ending,Minor Ellen Harvelle/Bobby Singer,Minor Charlie Bradbury/Jo Harvelle,Minor Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester Summary: For thirty years, Dean’s been in the dark about a bombshell of a family secret. When an AWOL soldier shows up on his doorstep in the middle of the night, he’s shoved into a world he had no idea existed. He never asked to be cloned. He never asked to have his genome edited to make him a super-soldier. He didn’t even know. Now his fate rests in the hands of a ragtag group—Castiel, the AWOL soldier sent as a warning by Sam and Dean’s father; Charlie, an ingenious hacker and Dean’s best friend; and his brother Sam, who’s also being chased by the government for the same reason. Can they pull the rug out from under the military general who’s after their father’s research, or will Sam and Dean be doomed to live the remainder of their lives being experimented on by the military?

He Can't Sleep | @pray4jensen

Rating: Mature Word Count: 18970 Main Tags/Warnings: Hurt/Comfort, Marriage, Domestic, Case Fic, Angst with a Happy Ending, Summary: He’s done soaping up Cas’ hair. He grabs the sponge at his side and starts to scrub at Cas’ skin, up along his arms, his neck, down his chest. When he runs it up his legs, to his thighs, Cas shudders and then there’s a hand cupping Dean’s cheek, cold and dripping water and soap, and Dean falters, looks at him for the first time. “Will you sleep with me?” Cas says. “Tonight?” Dean swallows. He says yes.

One Last Time | @confusedcasishere

Rating: Mature Word Count: 27370 Main Tags/Warnings: Sex Worker Dean Winchester, Dom/Sub, Dom Castiel/ Sub Dean Winchester, Lawyer Castiel, Top Castiel/ Bottom Dean Winchester, Porn With Plot Summary: After some convincing, Castiel agrees to try out a sex club. He’s nervous and looking for any excuse to back out, until he stumbles across a photo of a beautiful sub with captivating green eyes. Cas has to have him.

Highway to Hell (WIP) | @tucuxia

Rating: Mature Word Count: 31551 Main Tags/Warnings: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha Castiel/Omega Dean Winchester, Gabriel Has a Crush on Sam Winchester, Alpha Sam Winchester/Omega Gabriel, Alpha Balthazar/Omega Crowley, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Past Abuse, Dean's life hasn't been great, Biker Castiel, Biker Sam Winchester Summary: Castiel, who shares leadership of the Hells Angels biker gang with his two older alpha brothers, finds out that a rival gang has been encroaching on their territory. During a tense meeting with the Devil's Blood gang in Lawrence, KS, he becomes the owner of a scared, broken young omega named Dean. Having forgotten how to speak after a decade under Azazel's cruel ownership, can the young omega learn to trust his new family, and maybe reconnect with the one he lost?

I Choose You (WIP) | @baby-in-a-trenchcoat7

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 43284 Main Tags/Warnings: Fluff, Destiel, Slight Smut, High School Castiel/Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester Summary: High School AU. Castiel Novak has a dirty dream about the captain of the baseball team, Dean Winchester. Dean has a dirty dream about the nerdy Novak boy who hangs around the art room a lot. Castiel becomes Dean’s tutor, and the two soon learn that keeping their relationship platonic is harder than they thought. As their relationship develops, the two have to fight to overcome their problems while doing everything they can to stay together. Rated Explicit for sexual scenes.

Emergence | @ellis-park

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 58862 Main Tags/Warnings: Canon fic, angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort, amnesia, graphic depictions of violence Summary: Something’s been missing from Dean’s life for the past three years, a void left after a hunt gone terribly wrong. He often feels a sense of longing with no discernible cause, a need to talk to someone who isn’t there. A call from an acquaintance leads Dean to James Novak, a man who disappeared more than a decade ago, and suddenly Dean gets the feeling he’s found what he’s been missing. But James isn’t really James — he’s the angel Castiel, who’s wanted by angels, demons and hunters alike. And he may be at the center of the storm that wrecked Dean’s life all those years ago.

Forbidden Fruit (WIP) | @amyoatmeal

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 95427 Main Tags/Warnings: professor student au, stripper au, age difference, top!castiel/bottom!dean, unrequited castiel/balthazar, unrequited dean winchester/aaron bass, dean winchester & charlie bradbury, threats of noncon/sexual abuse, threats of violence, mentions of past trauma/abuse, angst Summary: Castiel Novak is a respectable, if not a little boring professor at his university. He lives a comfortable, financially stable life with his cat in his modestly-sized apartment. It would appear he has everything he needs, including an over-eager friend and colleague, but when fate tempts him with a seemingly familiar new student by the name of Dean Winchester, Castiel's comfortable life threatens to get turned on its head and things start to get a little juicy.

Stay With Me, Sweetheart | @a-mandala-rose

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 108710 Main Tags/Warnings: Dean/Cas, Dean/Lisa, Past Dean/Others, Past Cas/Others, Kid Fic, Serious Major Character Injury, Car Accident, PTSD/Panic Attacks, House Fires, Past Minor Canonical Character Death, Minor OC Death, Past Emotional Abuse, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Referenced Top Dean/Bottom Cas, Explicit Top Cas/Bottom Dean Summary: “Alright Cas, here comes the hard part. We’re gonna get you out of here, but we’ve gotta take the roof off and while we do that, we’re gonna have to cover you with a sheet to protect you from the glass. I’ll be right here though. I’m not going anywhere.” As he starts to drift away, he suddenly feels the press of Dean’s forehead against his own through the rough fabric and hears that warm, sunlit voice murmer quietly in his ear, too low to be overheard by the firefighters currently working to remove the SUV’s roof, “Stay with me, Sweetheart.” A single moment's distraction ends with a serious car accident that leaves Castiel trapped in his vehicle. Fortunately for him, fire fighter Dean Winchester is there, never leaving Castiel's side as the rest of his company work to free him from the mangled remains of his SUV. When the two meet again in the ICU, Castiel finds himself just as drawn to and comforted by the handsome fireman as he was during his accident. Dean is certainly attractive, but single father Castiel doesn't have time or space in his life for a romantic relationship. Then again, there's no harm in making a new friend, is there?

[tashaalyssa]

Our Earth-Bound Angel: An Open Letter to Misha Collins

September 18, 2008. It was a Thursday.

A simple, ordinary day. Most of us went to work, or school and when we came home, we were so excited to sit down and watch the new episode of this little show we were all kind of obsessed with called Supernatural. You might have heard of it, two annoyingly handsome brothers, a ’67 chevy impala, saving people, hunting things, the family business? Yeah, that’s the one. All I remember is having a ton of uni work to do, and Supernatural was always one of my favourite ways to procrastinate starting my assignments. Little did I know that on this particular Thursday, I and the rest of the world, including the Winchesters, would be introduced to a strange, stoic, ocean-blue-eyed, trench coat wearing being by the name of Castiel, Angel of the Lord.

As I sit here today, in November of 2020, hands down the strangest year I have been alive to witness and fifteen years after this incredible, groundbreaking show aired, I wait with anticipation, heartbreak and a grateful heart as the final episode hits our screens. I’m on the rollercoaster of emotions, as is the rest of the SPN family. Sam and Dean Winchester, and Castiel, have been so much more than television characters to so many people. They’ve been role models, safe places, escapes, friends we could always turn too when we felt alone. They’ve fought heaven, hell and everything in between, all while helping us fight the demons that a lot of us deal with everyday; depression, anxiety, repression, silence, violence, cruelty and bullying. Which brings me to why I'm writing this epistle. 

While Supernatural and it’s characters have been a crux of support, for me, there has been one soul at the centre of what I can only describe as a shift in perspective, mindset and spirituality that has changed the way I think, the way I live my life, the way I perceive the world and the way in which I am consciously aware. That soul is Misha Collins. 

Misha is the kind, genuine, incredible, humble human being who brought Castiel to life. He took this iconic angel through his journey from stoic, unwavering, unfeeling solider to the caring, loving, brave, loyal man he is today. Cas gave all of us who lived in the shadows a voice, he was a lost soul who fought for good, for love and for family at every turn. He discovered himself, he figured out right from wrong, figured out emotions, how to be and how to love, he figured out what truly made him happy, his love for a single human being. Cas is the embodiment of growth, of acceptance and of love. He is, and will forever be, one of the most groundbreaking characters to ever grace our screens (pun not intended, but I'll take it), and it's an astonishing and beautiful legacy to leave behind.

But the real earth-bound angel is Misha, the person. 

Misha has impacted and changed so many lives all around the world, not just with his character, but with who he is, what he fights for, and how he inspires. When he speaks, we listen. Where he leads, we follow. He has changed my life in monumental ways and it's interesting to think that a single person, who I've never even had the privilege to meet in person, has been able to change my entire life for the better. There is nobody quite like Misha; he's a change maker, an advocate, an educator, an activist, a philanthropist, an absolute force to be reckoned with. I’ve never seen someone who uses their power and platform of celebrity the way he does; to fight for good, to fight for change and truly make a difference on both massive and small scales. He has brought about more kindness, and more social and political change than I ever thought possible. 

In 2010, Misha, with help from the SPN Family, founded a non-profit organisation called Random Acts, which was the result of an immediate need to help those who had been affected by the earthquakes in Haiti at the time. Random Acts is an entirely volunteer-run organisation aiming to inspire change and help make a difference in people’s lives through acts of kindness. I have been working at Random Acts going on four years now. In that time, I have seen and been apart of so much good, so much kindness, it has truly lifted my soul and filled my heart at a deep level. I’ve been able to work with some of the greatest human beings on the planet, and many of them who have become close friends. Those who I can talk too when things are rough, those who know life can be hard, but they always have your back. I cherish them, I feel blessed everyday to know them, and without Misha and his desire to do good, I would never have found this amazing family. How does one even begin to say thank you for that?

For those of you who don’t know much about Random Acts, we are a non-profit organisation dedicated to conquering the world with kindness, one act at a time - and let me tell you, that’s exactly what we’re doing. The people in this organisation work tirelessly to save the world every single day. We’ve helped suffering communities rebuild their towns, homes and schools, our partnerships with GISH* and The Legacy of War Foundation* in the Change A Life project has seen over $750,000 raised for those in need. Let’s also not forget the development of the  Random Acts COVID-19 Support Program and the SPN Family Crisis Support Network*, which is dedicated to promoting awareness and providing resources to all those suffering from mental health issues, self-harm, depression, bullying and addiction. This year we are celebrating 10 years of kindness, and if you would like to know more about how to get involved or contribute to our anniversary campaign, you can do so here: https://www.randomacts.org/ten-years-of-kindness/  

But wait, there’s more, because that’s just who Misha is, like I said, a force to be reckoned with. Let’s face it, 2020 has been a nightmare on an epic scale; COVID,  racism, violence, the U.S presidency and the election, you name it, we’ve done it. Throughout this year, most of us felt our hope slip away bit by bit, the more we tried to fight, the more it felt like we lost. It felt as though the world was burning and we couldn’t do a damn thing to stop it. I think I finally understood how Sam, Dean and Cas felt at the brink of every apocalypse they ever faced, because that is truly what this year was; the apocalypse. But whenever things got really tough, whenever I didn’t know what to do, or how to react or how to make it better, I knew I could turn to Misha, because he would have the answer. His light, his wisdom and his capacity for hope and goodness was never short of a miracle, and it was what got me through most of those gut-wrenching, 'I can’t do this’ days. 

Misha is the type of person who acts on what he believes in, he is the person encouraging people to vote, providing resources and the information needed to make sure your votes were counted. He has had Random Acts volunteers bring snacks to people who were waiting in voting lines, he rallied his friends and the SPN Family to set up the SPN Phone Bank, he hosted the SPNVotes Zoom GOTV rally and episode watch party, and has provided us with Senate candidates and House of Representatives candidates lives and zoom talks so we can be as informed as possible. And that was just for the election. When the Black Lives Matter movement was at it’s height, Misha did everything in his power to educate, to assist and to fight for the rights of others: the GISH Change A Life project raised over $50,000 to fight malaria in Africa with Nothing But Nets and over $122,000 for Cut50 and Dream Corps' to help fight for criminal justice reform, he also provided us with access to discussions with senators and prominent leaders in social change so that we can be educated and so we can educate others on the serious issues that plague our society. 

I could go on and on about this man, because the above only scratches the surface of what Misha has done for the world. I have never had someone impact my way of thinking and way of being on such an epic scale. Most of you who know me know that first and foremost, I’m an actor and I’m a writer. The inspiration that Misha has brought to my creative process is a feat in itself. To be able to watch an actor take a guest-star role and turn it into not just a main character, but a phenomenal example of development, growth and creativity has forever changed the way I approach a script and a character. The choices I’ve seen Misha make as Cas, all versions of, have both truly astounded and surprised me, I look up to Misha as an actor because he’s so uniquely creative. He’s not afraid to try things, he’s not afraid to push the envelope and get out of his comfort zones. He knows character and story so very well, he knows exactly how to use the full spectrum of emotions exactly when needed, and he has what I can only think to describe as ‘presence’, as ‘energy’ that radiates off the screen. Watching Misha play, develop and grow the essence that is Cas’ has been an educating and enlightening experience to watch as an actor. 

For me as a human being, Misha has flipped the way I view the world and humanity on its head. He has this unbridled passion for life - and I don’t just mean in the sense that he loves life - I mean in the way where being around him, or listening to him, makes every person accountable for kindness and responsible for change. It’s not possible to follow Misha as a person and as an actor without being so heavily impacted by his views, his life, his art, his work, his capacity for good, everything. You don’t see that everyday. We don’t have enough of those kinds of leaders in our lives, and in a world where division and chaos is rife, people like Misha are our chance to save it. He is already so heavily impacting the way in which the next generation is going to behave, they are turning to him now to see how to be, what to do, how to make the world better. And he is teaching them and showing them the way and I couldn’t be prouder to call this man my idol.

So this is my thank you, in the best way I know how. In case nobody’s told you lately Misha, you are one of a kind. They broke the mould when they made you. You are the kindest, most inspiring soul and this world is so lucky and so blessed to have you. I feel privileged that I get to share a planet with you, and that I get to be living on this earth at the same time as you. You’ve changed the world, changed me, and changed all of us for the better.  You’ve opened our eyes to issues and concerns, whether it be social, environmental, political or otherwise that we may not have understood or given much thought to before you showed us why we should. You’ve made us feel safe, you’ve given us the space and room to be ourselves, to not be ashamed of being different or unique. You have never judged us, but you have always encouraged and supported us. You have this beautiful way of talking to people, of using words to encourage and inspire and motivate us to be the change, to do the good, and to fight the fight.  You light up any room you’re in or screen that you’re on, you make us smile and laugh, and when we feel down or low, it is you we turn too. Maybe you truly do have angel grace inside of you. You are the example to which I live my life by, and the standard to which I hold myself accountable. I hope one day to be even half the human being you are. I’m beyond grateful for everything you’ve taught me, about life, about acting, about being a good human, about being yourself and being the good you want to see in the world.

Thank you for Cas. Thank you for Random Acts and the Crisis Network. Thank you for GISH and the Change A Life project. Thank you for teaching me how to be better. Thank you for caring about the world. Thank you for your hope, wisdom and kindness. Thank you for changing the world. Thank you for saving our lives. Thank you for changing my life. Thank you for being you.

Some heroes don’t wear capes, some wear trenchcoats. 

You are my hero. You are truly an angel, there is no fiction about that.

I love you.

xxx

* GISH: The Greatest International Scavenger Hunt, also founded and run by Misha, is an annual event that mixes the weird, the magical, the strange and the brilliant into one big machine that uses playfulness and creativity to spread kindness: https://www.gish.com/ 

* The Legacy of War Foundation: Co-founded by the incredible soul that is Giles Duley, to help empower and rebuild the lives of those who have been affected by conflict and violence: https://www.legacyofwarfoundation.com/ 

* SPN Family Crisis Network: Founded by Misha and fellow actors, Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki upon listening to the stories told to them by the fans about their  personal struggles with mental health issues, depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts/attempts, self-harm, and addiction in order to support and help fans cope with such issues: https://www.imalive.org/, https://twloha.com/, and https://www.randomacts.org/random-acts-support-network/ 

[until-theend-oftheline]

100 Drabbles to Say I love You

Okay so first of credit to this list which is the one I am using for this -  I’m doing this because I tend to work a lot on series whenever I have time which also means I don’t post nearly as much as I used too. Well that and I am busy all the time and have been struggling with a writers block. Though I got a feeling these might help that. 

I want you guys to request a pairing for each of these. There is no timeline on when I will get any of them done. I might post one tonight or it might take a year before I get to yours. I all depends on what inspires me when. When someone requests a pairing I will add it to the prompt and that prompt will be taken - just to be clear it’s me who is eventually gonna write these. It isn’t a challenge. 

I am open to write for both SPN and MCU and you can chose between the pairings listed under the cut just before the prompts. Just send me an ask with your request. If you send me the request off anon you will be tagged whenever I post the drabble. 

SPN Characters x Reader: Dean and Cas

MCU Characters x Reader: Steve, Bucky, Wanda, Clint and Sam. 

SPN Ships: Destiel (willing to do this poly with reader too), Deonna, Saileen.

MCU Ships: Stucky (willing to do this poly with reader too), Winterhawk (willing to do this poly with reader too), Winterwidow, Winterwitch, Winterfalcon (only as poly with a reader), Steggy, Clintasha

RPF x Reader: Jensen Ackles, Danneel Ackles, Misha Collins, Sebastian Stan and Chris Evans. 

RPF Ships: Cockles (only as poly with reader), Evanstan (only as poly with reader) and Jenneel (willing to do this poly with reader as well as just the ship)

As a little something extra, I am also willing to write Jefferson from Ouat ;)

Prompts

“Pull over.  Let me drive for awhile.” - Dean Winchester x Reader for @becs-bunker 

“It reminded me of you.”

“No, no, it’s my treat.”

“Come here.  Let me fix it.” - Winterhawk for Anon

“I’ll walk you home.”

“Have a good day at work.”

“I dreamt about you last night.”

“Take my seat.”

“I saved a piece for you.”

“I’m sorry for your loss.”

“You can have half.” - Dean Winchester x Reader for @thegirlwhorunswithwinchesters

“Take my jacket, it’s cold outside.” - Steve Rogers x Reader for @patzammit

“Sorry I’m late.”

“Can I have this dance?”

“I made your favourite.”

“It’s okay.  I couldn’t sleep anyway.”

“Watch your step.”

“Here, drink this.  You’ll feel better.”

“Can I hold your hand?”

“You can borrow mine.”

“You might like this.”

“It’s not heavy.  I’m stronger than I look.” - Chris Evans x Reader for @blacktithe7

“I’ll wait.”

“Just because.” - Sebastian Stan x Reader for @jhangelface0523

“Look both ways.”

“I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to.” - Steve Rogers for @beardburnsupersoldiers

“Try some.”

“Drive safely.”

“Well, what do you want to do?”

“One more chapter.” - Damien Haas x Reader

“Don’t worry about me.” 

“It looks good on you.” - Sam Wilson x Reader for @jewels2876

“Close your eyes and hold out your hands.” - Winterhawk for @doyouknowwhoiam2 

“That’s okay, I bought two.”

“After you.”

“We’ll figure it out.”

“Can I kiss you?”

“I like your laugh.” - Bucky Barnes x Reader for @jhangelface0523

“Don’t cry.”

“I made this for you.” -  Sebastian Stan x Reader for @blacktithe7

“Go back to sleep.”

“Is this okay?”

“I picked these for you.”

“I’ll drive you to the hospital.”

“What do you want to watch?”

“You can go first.”

“Did you get my letter?” - Jensen Ackles x Reader for @percywinchester27

“I’ll do it for you.”

“Call me when you get home.”

“I think you’re beautiful.” -  Chris Evans x Reader for Anon

“Are you sure?”

“Have fun.”

“Sit down, I’ll get it.”

“I made reservations.”

“I don’t mind.”

“It brings out your eyes.”

“There is enough room for both of us.”

“You don’t have to say anything.”

“Wow.”

“Happy birthday.”

“I’ll pick it up after work.”

“It can wait until tomorrow.”

“Cross my heart and hope to die.”

“It’s two sugars, right?”

“I’ll help you study.”

“Stay over.”

“I did the dishes.”

“You didn’t have to ask.”

“I bought you a ticket.”

“You’re warm.” - Sebastian Stan x Reader for Anon

“No reason.”

“I’ll meet you halfway.”

“Take mine.”

“We can share.”

“I was just thinking about you.”

“I want you to have this.”

“Call me if you need anything.”

“Do you want to come too?”

“I’ll still be here when you’re ready.”

“Is your seatbelt on?”

“Sweet dreams.”

“I was in the neighborhood.”

“Stay there.  I’m coming to get you.” - Sam Wilson x Reader for @niall2017

“The key is under the mat.”

“It doesn’t bother me.”

“You’re important too.”

“I saved you a seat.” - Jenneel x Reader for @sorenmarie87

“I’ll see you later.”

“I noticed.”

“You can tell me anything.”

“I hope you like it.”

“I want you to be happy.”

“I believe in you.”

“You can do it.”

“Good luck.”

“I brought you an umbrella.” - Chris Evans x Reader for @blacktithe7

“I’ll pick you up at the airport.”

“Take a deep breath.” - Sebastian Stan x Reader for @doyouknowwhoiam2 

“Be careful.”

 “I love you.”

[atc74]

Warrior

Square(s) Filled: Where there’s a will, there’s a way for @as-the-saying-goes-bingo​; Free Space for @spngenrebingo​

Warnings: mental health discussion, age gap, fluff, encouragement, TW: mentions of attempted suicide

Summary: Y/N is a young new actress that has landed a guest role on Supernatural. One of the main stars is a hero to her and she let’s him know, inspiring him even further. 

Pairing: Jared x Reader

Word Count: 1121

Written for: @as-the-saying-goes-bingo​, and for anonymous who sent the following prompt for my 1k notes celebration:  hello!! can i get a sam or jared (surprise me) with the "You look good in my sweater" prompt? maybe the reader can be younger like in her 20's? or not haha tysm! ~D

Beta’d by: @amanda-teaches​

A/N: I hope you like the direction I took this. It kind of just happened. The power of this fandom can do amazing things.

As a reminder, this is a work of fiction and should be regarded as such. No harm is intended toward the actor(s) or their families.

Immerse yourself in Jared’s scent and buy it here from @scentsfromthebunker!

“Hey, you’re Y/N, right?” a deep voice asked. Y/N spun around in the wardrobe trailer to find the two stars of the show standing right in front of her. She couldn’t believe her luck when she landed a guest star spot on the show. She may have only been 23, but Y/N had been acting long enough to know that this role could really help her career, and it didn’t hurt that she was a fan. Keep it together, Y/N, she thought to herself. 

“Yes. And, you’re Jared and Jensen. It’s a pleasure to meet you both.” She extended her hand, giving them each a firm shake. 

‘We’ll let you get back to it. We just wanted to drop in and introduce ourselves before the first scene,” Jensen said. 

“See you later, Y/N!” Jared waved and they both left the trailer. 

~*~

“You were really great in that scene, Y/N,” Jensen complimented her as they walked toward the trailers a few days later. “You knocked it out of the park.” Jared nodded his agreement. 

Y/N couldn’t believe the fun she was having. Supernatural was by far the best set she had ever worked on, and she realized how terribly sad she was going to be when her guest spot wrapped. 

“Thanks, Jensen. That means a lot coming from you guys.” Y/N looked up, smiling shyly at them. She wrapped her arms around herself in an effort to warm up. The week started off warm enough, but a cold front had dropped the temperature significantly. 

“You cold?” Jared asked, concern lacing his voice as they approached his trailer. 

“Um, yeah. It’s crazy cold here!” she admitted. “You guys must be used to it by now, especially with the infinite layers of Winchester flannel!”

“Yeah that helps, but you don’t really get used to it. We just go back to Texas to thaw out!” Jensen laughed. “Go. I’m going to call my wife and kids. I’ll see you in a bit to finish running those lines.” 

“Come inside, let’s get you out of the cold,” Jared urged, opening his door and waving Jensen off. He ran to the back and came back with a sweatshirt, handing it to Y/N. 

“Thank you,” she acknowledged as she shrugged it over her head. It was about three sizes too big, but it was warm and smelled like Jared, making her smile. “I have the same one at home, in a slightly smaller size.”

Jared stood admiring her. It wasn’t the first time in their few days together that he had taken notice of her. Even Jensen had noticed how taken his friend was with the younger actress. 

“Oh yeah. Well, then, I should be the one thanking you for your support,” he smiled shyly, his eyes never leaving her. 

“What? Do I have something on my face from lunch?” she gasped, quickly wiping her chin in embarrassment. 

“What? No, no, nothing like that. I was just thinking you look really good in my sweater,” Jared blushed as he looked away. “I’m sorry. That was, I, uh, fuck, I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Jared, it’s okay. You’re not making me uncomfortable. If anything, I’m flattered. You’re Jared Padalecki. You’re Sam Fucking Winchester, and just being in your presence this week has been an honor in itself. I’m not just a fan of the show, and I don’t have one of these just to show my support.” Her eyes cast down as she pushed up the sleeves on the sweater he had loaned her. 

Jared was speechless. He had met dozens upon dozens of fans at conventions that had shared their stories of struggle and stories of triumph with him, but he had never encountered anyone else in the business that shared something like this with him. He moved closer, taking her hands, his thumbs gently rubbing over the jagged scars. “You’re a warrior.” 

“Because of you, Jared,” she whispered. “You and your campaign made a difference and are the reason I didn’t give up, that I keep fighting every single day. You gave me the will to get up and keep going, keep fighting.”

“Wow, I am even more impressed with you now than I was before. You’re smart, talented, beautiful, and a fighter, just like me,” he murmured. “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”

“I still have some bad days, but they’re fewer and far between. I’m in a good place now. And, hey, I landed a guest spot on my favorite show and got to meet you. The path may be dark and twisted, but it led me to the light,” she said. “It led me to you, Jared.” 

“Go to dinner with me tonight?” Jared blurted out. “I mean, if you want. I’d love to hear more of your story, if you’re willing to share, that is. No pressure, I promise.” 

“I’d like that. I know the fans often tell you of their own stories and struggles, and it must weigh on you. Let me be there for you. After all, you’ve done so much for the rest of us, let me do something for you,” Y/N countered. 

“That sounds really great, actually,” Jared sighed, feeling lighter. Just as he opened his mouth, the door of his trailer swung open.

 “Okay, I’m back! You ready?” Jensen asked, rushing through the door, only to stop when he saw his best friend and Y/N holding hands. “What the fuck did I miss?”

“Nothing,” Y/N said.

“She’s a warrior, Jen,” Jared whispered. 

“I told you she was perfect for you. When are you going to stop doubting me and realize that I am always right?” Jensen smirked, patting his buddy on the back. “Well, like ninety-eight percent of the time!”

~*~

Jared and Y/N had taken it slow and laid a solid foundation over the last six months, making their relationship more stable than even they could have anticipated. When he asked for her opinion on the new campaign, she immediately knew it wasn’t just a new campaign, but a gift for her. A gift of his appreciation, admiration, and support for sharing her story with him and the fandom at a recent convention.

Jared filmed the live stream from set with Jensen, Misha, and Y/N at his side, all donned in one of the new shirts. “Whether you are struggling with mental health yourself, or know someone who is, always keep fighting.” Jared turned to Jensen. 

“Because you are not alone,” Jensen added. ““Love yourself first.” 

“Because you are enough,” Misha contributed. “And, family always has your back.” 

“Always keep fighting,” Y/N smiled warmly into the camera. “Because you are a warrior.”

Did you like it? The nicest thing you can do for a writer is reblog their work and tell them, and others, how much you like it!

The Whole Enchilada: @iwantthedean​ @dolphincliffs​ @mrswhozeewhatsis​ @meganwinchester1999​ @cherrycokegirls1​ @closetspngirl​  @roxyspearing​ @flamencodiva​ @blacktithe7​ @sis-tafics​ @just-another-busyfangirl​ @evansrogerskitten​ @amanda-teaches​ @hannahindie​ @wotinspntarnation​ @winchesterprincessbride​ @winecatsandpizza​ @kickingitwithkirk​  @wi-deangirl77​ @hobby27​ @mogaruke​ @gh0stgurl​ @alleiradayne​ @idreamofplaid​ @seenashwrite​ @manawhaat​ @crashdevlin​ @thoughtslikeaminefield​ @emoryhemsworth​

The Sam Sin-dicate / Jared’s Menagerie: @supernatural-jackles​ 

[i-miss-balthazar]

Stacy’s Bridal Boutique

Warnings: Light homophobia, but it’s shut down really quick

Rating: General audiences

Pairing: Debriel

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“Hey Dean-o~” Gabriel hummed, flopping down on the couch next to Dean. Dean quickly changed the channel, and Gabriel scoffed. “Everyone knows you’re obsessed with that show, you don’t have to hide it.” He teased, watching a soft colour tinge Dean’s cheeks, and the hunter faltered for words. “Come on, don’t act like you don’t love good old Doctor Sexy…” Gabriel purred, snapping as his appearance changed to the famous doctor - cowboy boots included this time. 

“What do you want, Gabe.” Dean sighed, stealing a quick glance before averting his gaze.

“I’m bored, Dean. Let’s go do something!” Gabriel urged. Dean let his eyes fall back to the archangel, a soft smile tugging his lips at Gabriel’s imitation of Sam’s puppy dog eyes. 

“Alright, Gabe… what are you thinking?” He asked. Since Gabriel’s return, he and the trickster had gotten very close. What could he say? Gabriel had a good sense of humour, friendly smile, and was easy to talk to. Not to mention how many times the sugar addict had brought home pie… 

“That’s the spirit.” Gabriel wiggled his eyebrows, snapping them to a location. Dean looked around, before giving Gabriel a tired look. 

“No.” He stated. 

“Yes. Come on, Dean-o, it’ll be fun!”

“I am not going to try on dresses.”

“Just one?”

“No.”

“Please Dean-o? For me?”

“They probably won’t even let us!”

“Eh, you’d be shocked.”

“Gabriel, this is a bridal shop! I don’t exactly look like the kind of person who could afford this.” “Lucky you have a sugar daddy.”

“Excuse me, WHAT?” Dean turned to him in confusion. Gabriel laughed brightly.

“I’m teasing, Dee, lighten up.” He tapped his finger to Dean’s nose, and Dean nearly went cross-eyed trying to follow.  “I mean me. I make loads from my time in the porn industry.” Gabriel chuckled. “Try on one dress. We’ll keep it between us, but I’m telling you, once you put it on, you’re like a whole new person.” He laughed.

“You’ve done this before?” Dean asked. Gabriel simply wiggled his eyebrows, tugging Dean into the store before he could say no. 

A woman greets them as they enter, hands clasped neatly and a cherry smile that looks forced on her face. Dean didn’t miss the faint condescending look when she took in their less-than-affluent appearances. They by no means looked like they could afford this place. 

“Can I help you?” She asked, looking down her nose at them. 

“Yes, we’re looking at dresses.” Gabriel smiled, taking the lead because Dean was blushing up to his ears and couldn’t find words if he wanted to. 

“It’ll be harder without your fiance here, but we can show you our selection.” The woman - Marge, as her name tag said - offered. 

“Oh no, we are fiances. The dresses are for us.” Gabriel corrected. She stared blankly.

“Oh.” She responded, her smile falling into a scowl. “You’re those kinds of people…” Gabriel’s expression immediately changed, and he opened his mouth, but another woman’s voice stopped him.

“Excuse me, Marge? Did I hear you correctly?” The woman, with her black hair tied back in a ponytail and a hard look on her face, asked. Marge starts, her face paling as she realized how badly she’d messed up. “You can take your things and go home, that is not the attitude we want representing our company.” The woman sighed, and Marge opened her mouth to object, but a glare sent her rushing off. “I’m so sorry for her… I’m Johanna Stacy. Owner.” The new woman introduced, shaking their hands. 

“Pleasure to meet you, Miss.” Gabriel smiled. “We’re looking for dresses…”

“Of course. Do you know what you’d like? Any opinions on style, or colour?” She asked. 

“I want something unique. Maybe a pop of gold… sweetheart neckline and an a-line skirt, please.” Gabriel hummed. Dean glanced at him quizzically; this was definitely something Gabriel had thought of before. 

“Do you have your measurements?” Johanna asked. Gabriel nodded, rattling off some numbers that didn’t make sense. 

“Stella, can you go grab that dress with the gold lace please?” Johanna called. A pretty blonde looked up from the desk, smiling and scurrying off. Johanna turned to Dean. “How about you?” She asked, and Dean felt like a fish out of water. 

“I’m… Kinda new at this…” he admitted, throwing a glare to Gabriel who just grinned back at him. 

“That’s fine. Come with me, I’ll help you.” Johanna smiled. 

~|~

The experience wasn’t as bad as Dean assumed it would be. Johanna was sweet and patient while he pointed at pictures that looked nice and pretended to know what was going on. In the end Johanna found him a champagne coloured ball gown dress that went off the shoulders with a gentle lace. 

He couldn’t lie, it was weird to be wearing a dress, but as he gazed in the mirror… it looked beautiful. In the strangest way, he felt like a princess. It’s just for fun. He told himself. Just for Gabe. 

When Dean walked out, he was met with the sight of Gabriel in a beautiful white dress, gold lace covering the top and spilling down the skirt in an elegant pattern. He felt his jaw hang open because wow. Gabriel looked absolutely amazing.

“Gabriel…” he began, unable to find the words to describe how Gabriel looked. Dean almost wished he was at an alter right then. Gabriel just smiled in a knowing way. 

“Thanks Dean-o. You look not so bad yourself.” Gabriel hummed. Dean’s cheeks heated up, and he looked down at the brilliant dress, mumbling a thank you. “Come on, beautiful. Give me a twirl.” The archangel smirked. Dean rolled his eyes. 

“Don’t push it.” He warned, and Gabriel laughed brightly, spinning around and making the skirt flow elegantly. Dean smiled fondly, admiring the joyful expression on Gabriel’s face. 

“We’ll take them!” Gabriel declared. Dean went to object, but found the archangel had taken his voice. Johanna offered a smile. 

“Good! You two look stunning.” She praised, and Dean blushed darker. It shouldn’t feel so nice to be in a dress. He decided that he would personally kill Gabriel if anyone ever found out. 

~|~

“Why’d you buy the dresses?” Dean asked once they were in the car, the gowns snapped to wherever Gabriel decided was better. 

“Johanna was really nice. I’d feel bad for just leaving.” Gabriel shrugged. Dean supposed that made sense, the amount of patience that took was incredible. Plus she fired an employee on the spot for commenting on their gender…

“You looked good.” Dean commented. Gabriel always looked good, that didn’t quite sum it up. “Happy, I mean, y’know? I don’t think I’ve seen you that happy in a long time.” He carried on. Come to think of it, Dean wasn’t sure he’d seen Gabriel that happy ever. Gabriel merely shrugged. 

“It isn’t often I get to show that feminine side of myself. Guess I just had fun.” He responded. Well at this point, Dean had taken a wrong turn at Albuquerque, and was completely lost. Gabriel must’ve sensed that, because he sighed, beginning to speak once more. “Angels aren’t actually assigned genders, it’s kinda more a ‘pick your favourite’. Most angels just go with whatever their vessel is for convenience sake. I kinda… flow between them. It’s called genderfluid technically. I don’t expect you to understand, but just… yeah,” Gabriel shrugged. Dean hesitated. 

“You’re right… I don’t understand.” He sighed. Gabriel’s gaze fell out the window.  “But I want to. You’re just gonna have to be patient, okay? I’ll do my best, but I might need explaining from time to time.” Dean finished. Gabriel looked over at him, relief dancing in his eyes. He could’ve said thank you. He could’ve tried to explain everything right there. He could’ve told Dean that was all he could ask. But instead, Gabriel snapped them back to the garage of the bunker, so he could safely grab Dean by the front of the shirt and pull him into a deep and passionate kiss. That was the best thanks Dean could’ve ever asked for.

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Representation Week Tag List:

@misha-moose-dean-burger-lover​ @specialagentrin​ @peanutbutterandgrapejelly​ @all-or-nothing-baby​ @petrichoravellichor​ @i-know-like-four-things​ @fantastikitty7​ @is-jus-me​ @hexlorde​

Author’s Note: Couldn’t resist a good rare pair! This is actually inspired by my wonderful girlfriend, so kudos to her too <3 

Dresses used as inspiration, courtesy of google:

Gabriel: 

Dean:

[keagan-ashleigh]

Ooooh damn, I just watched the finale (couldn't watch it live, had to wait a little bit, that's why I wasn't on Tumblr yesterday and today, I know better than login in when they're is an absolute certainty to get spoiled). I am such a mess right know, I am crying my heart out for real, sobbing and sobbing.

Sure it wasn't exactly the ending I was hoping for. But it's okay. I was telling it the other day my hope about getting a destiel happy ending was actually real low because I am disillusioned and Jensen's acting in episode 18 screamed that it was a definite goodbye to Castiel, his tears and lack of fire reaction he always had when Sam or Cas died and was fighting to get them back, it was just so solemn, it was telling "this time there is no defying death", so that's really what was getting my hope low. And at some point I saw Misha's post saying something around the lines of "you did that guys", I knew he wasn't in the episode, so I made my peace with not having my ideal ending before hitting play.

I expected Dean to die (just not like that, to be honest) because Jensen told that he wasn't feeling ok with his ending and knowing the context about lgbt representation (I didn't think they were going to give us a canon destiel, I was hoping for it but I know most shows don't do that and that Supernatural wasn't going to be different on that end) I sort of knew it wasn't to be Dean and Castiel flying away, the only logical and probable explanation was that Dean died. But I did wanted Castiel to just be there, if not on earth then in heaven. I didn't even mind if they weren't going to be romantically together, I just wanted them to be together. They didn't. They didn't go the extra mile, but I know how it is, despite great show being more inclusive I know there is so little shows willing to go that extra mile, so no, I wasn't expecting it, I was hoping that maybe, you know.

I wanted so much more than such a fast ending for him and for Castiel, it was disappointing on that point, yet I feel like it's ok. I wasn't even expecting the show to make Castiel speak of his love for Dean, to make him gay, they delivered more than I was hoping for just a week ago. It's not perfect, it's not ideal, but it's ok. They still ended it the way that was right for Dean and Sam, the first being at peace with himself and the world, feeling loved and deserving of happiness, the ultimate happiness that is heaven, with the certainty of an eternity spent with the people he loved, minus Cas (but I will headcanon them reuniting cause if he helped reshape heaven that means that he is ok, that Jack brought him back from the empty), resting at last, him the soldier who could never stop fighting, it fits him well that in the end he stopped, because it was right; the latter having the life he dreamed of, with normalcy, a family, a dog, a steady and fufilling life, before finding back his brother in heaven.

I understand what Jensen meant. It doesn't feel right at first, no he can't go like that, so fast, so miserably, but then it feels appropriate and respectful of who the character had been for 15 seasons. He deserved heaven, he deserved rest, he deserved self love. Sam deserved a life. We never hoped for less for those characters, so yes we may feel robbed because we didn't imagined it like this. But it was nonetheless beautiful and right.

The finale felt not epic, no big fight, not a super dramatic way of dying in comparison to every over death they got us used to in this show, but they did got an epic finale in episode 19, this was way more intimate and I think it's exactly what it needed to be.

I just wished they went the extra mile with Cas, I wish they just brought him back. My only disappointment was that they didn't bring him back at all. But I can't complain because him finding happiness in loving and sacrificing for Dean was in character, even though it would have been better if he could have just been around more. Being with humans, with Sam and Dean, then being a father for Jack, taught him so much about love, he learned to be free, to stand for himself and for the ones he love, so, it's not actually the worst way to end his character arc. I know people are disappointed, I understand why, I am not 100% happy I this ending either,but it was a logical end for his character, if not the perfect ending for him. It still makes sense, no matter how wrong it does feel from our perspective.

So, in the end, I am not disappointed. I am not angry at them for not making destiel canon. They actually gave way more than what I was ever hoping for with that show and with television in general.

They changed the game. If I am not mistaking destiel is the first ship that was so iconic that if you ask people to tell you about fandom and shipping Supernatural and destiel pop into minds, I personally can't think of any ship prior to the show that has been so visible in and outside the realm of fandom, perhaps in Star Trek, but at the time fandoms were a discreet thing, it wasn't at the same level of visibility. They changed the fandom experience, fans and cast, outside and inside the show by acknowledging fandom and paying it their respect, they changed the fandom experience.

They left an imprint because the fandom has been so important that it gave the very loud and clear message "this is what we want, we want you to make efforts to give a better representation". I'm not saying it is just spn that has had this impact, this wouldn't be fair to all the other shows that were making efforts, I don't know all of them but this is the first time that a gay ship is so iconic that you know about it even if you don't even watch the show. I remember what tv shows looked like around 2005, I was 17 back then, there was that dynamic het hero and het love interest and even though shows were progressing, they weren't flirting that much with the idea of two male leads being in a romantic dynamic and they weren't giving two shits about their fandom and about acknowledging their importance and the importance of their work to enrich the whole experience. SPN went the extra mile for that period's standard, that is something we can't brush away.

That doesn't mean we can't criticise the queerbaiting, of course not, it doesn't mean we got to praise it no matter what, I don't say they were perfect, they weren't and they are to blame on some levels, that just means that no matter what, Supernatural changed the dynamic in television. Shipping existed before but never before was it so much vocal and present outside the secrecy of fandoms. We owe them to recognize the good they indeed did. They really did way more than 90% of the shows out there, especially from shows that started around mid 00's, in terms of representation and in terms of allowing fandom, and especially fanwork, to be respected. I'm not saying we owe only to Supernatural the fact that more and more shows give us better representation and respect, I am saying that they had a significative influence. We have to look at what was television and fandom before to really see what drastically changed thanks to that show and some others.

They didn't go all the way to making it canon but they did something spectacular in delivering a bit of what we were asking for. I wasn't expecting them to ever acknowledging destiel on screen at all. They did. And I was gobsmacked because I never thought they would. They have turned some of the queerbaiting into foreshadowing, and that my dudes is huge. Yes there is job to do to get rid of the kill your gays and making more than half of the ship canon, but they've set a standard. From such an iconic show to make that step is sending a message. I know other shows have canon gay ships, maybe Supernatural showrunners got inspired by them, but despite the fact I love those show dearly and passionately we have to recognize they aren't having the same cultural imprint that Supernatural is having.

This is in the end let's say, not satisfying because they could have been even more progressive and even more right to the characters, but it is progress, and it is right to the characters. And I am happy for it. I am not mad. This is not meaningless.

I can't express how thankful I am for this show that has been such a comfort in my life, a show that has introduced me to the world of fandoms, a show that has brought me so much joy and relief from life, a show that has been there to give me a sense of being part of a community, a show that has introduced me to the concept of shipping, a show that has actually taught me a lot about bisexuality and introduced to the lgbt community, a show that taught me about deserving love and to be true to myself, a show that has inspired me as a writer, as a person, a show that has held my hand for 15 long years. I can't be mad. I can't feel resentment because my ship isn't canon, because in the end they told me it was right to write my own story about the characters and that I was right to believe in it. I can't be mad at this ending even though I wished it was different, because it still is a respectful goodbye, and it feels like they told me "that's okay". I can go now. I can turn this page and start to write another one. They have changed me, they have helped me become the person I am today, I learned so much through those characters.

I owe them a thank you, a billions of thank yous, not a "you could have done better".

So, that is how I feel. I understand people are unhappy and it is important that we address what is wrong with it, but I think we should be grateful for everything they did delivered during those 15 years, and they delivered... so much.

[drjackandmissjo]

Roses are Red, Tattoos are Forever

Chapter 3 --- previous chapter

Feysand masterlist

The Sherlock Conundrum

Florist and tattoo artist Au, Modern Day

“Can you please stop with this madness? Hugh Laurie is clearly the best Sherlock ever!”

They were both sitting on the couch of his living room. Really close to each other. She had her left knee under her body and was fully facing him. He had been throwing glances at her way the whole time she’s been there, and now was admiring her everything as they bantered lovingly.

After a particularly rough client, that had taken her nearly seven hours to finish, she came into his shop claiming: “We’re both closing earlier, I need to rest and so do you.”

At his attempt to tell her off, cause “I don’t need to rest I am in pristine fit every second of every minute”, she simply replied with an elongated ‘Please’ and a pair of puppy dog eyes that would’ve put a Labrador to shame.

Useless to say, they ended up on his couch half an hour later, a marathon of the fourth season of House M.D. on the television and chips and popcorn all around.

Feyre is harder than she looks, tougher. She likes to drink whiskey and burning liquor and beer.

Rhys, on the other hand, is a refined rosé man. He drinks fruity drinks and cocktails and vodka. He tried the same stuff that she drinks, once, when they went out with the rest of the inner circle after Az had received a promotion. It didn’t end well.

Feyre and Cassian will forever tease him about it.

Since their taste in alcohol was on such a wide spectrum, they decided to settle for some sparkly Coca-Cola for that fine night.

About halfway through episode six, the debate had begun. The show was soon forgotten and left as a white noise machine that lulled them into their silliness.

“Feyre Darling. You are being delusional. Dr House’s got nothing on RDJ’s Sherlock. Just cause the character was inspired by Conan Doyle’s work it doesn’t mean it can be considered a Sherlock.”

She laughed. A delicious sound that was filling his days more and more each morning. “Do you know that Conan Doyle based Shelly on a doctor, right? Also, yeah Jude Law’s better than Wilson, that is true.”

“Can we just agree that Cumberbatch and Freeman are equally amazing.”

“Yeah, duh! But, controversial opinion: I don’t actually ship Jonhlock romantically.”

“More like platonic soul-mates? Makes complete sense. They are not interested in each other at all. You are right, Fey-ruh Acheron.”

‘HOW DARE SHE...’, he thought severely displeased.

“Oh please don’t be pissed at me. I like them together and everything, but in my mind, Sherlock is pretty much ace-aro. I mean, Cumberbatch was also Smaug. Which in the books is described as a dragon while the movies decided to portray him like a vixen...” He solemnly nodded.

That is, indeed, a severe problem in mainstream media.

“That is, indeed, a severe problem in today mainstream media. We live in a world where people don’t know the difference between one another! Daenerys Mother of Dragons? More like Dany The Soccer Mom of three cool lizards. That would be more appropriate!”

“Don’t talk to me about Dany, I’m still pissed about Jonerys. I mean, fan-service much? Okay, I can deal with that. But don’t freaking kill Viserion and try to make us all believe that HIS MOTHER WOULD FUCK HER NEPHEW THIRTY MINUTES LATER!”

She laughed again.

‘Gods above and below,’ he thought, ‘how much can a person love another?’

“Agree 100% on Viserion, though Jon after Ygrit should’ve just zipped up his pants and close business. You experience that kind of love once in your screentime. And when you do, Martin kills the counterpart off immediately after the big scene. You know that sadist is gonna kill you off, so just spare him the dirty deeds to write.”

“The dirty deeds are the reasons he is taking so much to finish that freaking book. Also, salty much?"

"You dare calling me salty? It’s been years and you still weep over Robb’s body.”

“Excuse you, it is a very fine body. Have you seen Richard Madden lately? With that kilt at Kit and Rose’s wedding? Fine AF.”

She was now scooting over, moving closer to his face to find a reaction.

“Fine, you’re right. But Darling, you know damn well I am attracted to that man, you can’t just casually throw his name around! That would be like me, saying that Misha has aged like a fine whisky.”

“And where would a lie hide in that sentence?”

“ANYWAY. We were talking of something terrifically important.”

He decided to add a Meaningful Pause to give himself some dramatic effect...

“How can you say you don’t ship Jonhlock romantically?”

‘Honesly I love that woman. She is my other half, I would die for her and with her. My life without her has no meaning.

But if her answer doesn’t please me then so help me God I will suffer through a meaningless life with the strength of my ships.’ His mind said.

“I told you before the 'The Hobbit/Game of Thrones' parenthesis. When I read the books I thought of Sherlock as a madman who cared about Watson profoundly, but mostly cares about himself and his work. Someone who doesn’t dwell into feelings, doesn’t really enjoy sexual times and, truly, a modern-day asexual and aromantic asshole with a kink for unofficial police work. Yes, He and Watson are amazing together, and especially with RDJ and Jude Law I saw the sexual tension, which then I also saw in the BBC’s version. But for me, since I read the books first, Jonhlock will always be the exact relationship shown by House and Wilson. Sorry to disappoint.”

She was so close to him, he could smell her shampoo and count the freckles across her nose. She was staring directly into his soul. Rhys was fully clothed in an old tee and some pants and yet he’d never felt more naked.

“You never disappoint me. As a matter of fact, you never cess to amaze me, Feyre Acheron. You are perfect and beautiful both on the inside as well as on the outside. Here I was, looking for a polite way to kick you out of my apartment after you say you don’t ship one of my OTPs and now, here still I am trying not to be drowned into you and trying not to get lost into your eyes and I love you so fucking much that it physically hurts.”

His inner monologue at the time? ‘Fuck. FUCK. What the fuck did I just say???’

She had managed to fry his whole brain with her smart reasoning and perfect voice and now he had ruined a perfect moment by saying cheesy stuff to a girl that didn’t particularly care for cheese.

That was the end of Rhysand Sphera as we all know and love him.

Cause of death: killed by Feyre Acheron as result of saying something completely idiotic.

Only...

“Do you really mean that?”

She sounded hopeful and scared at the same time. The horrors she had to face in the past came running back to her and were written all over her face. Rhys took her hands in his. They were both trembling.

His mouth had probably never been that dry and yet aching to speak at the same time. He could only nod and pray she reciprocated.

That was the moment of truth.

“Of course I mean it. All of it. Each unsaid sentence and each shared glances. Every time I bring you coffee or a send you a picture of a dog that walks into my shop with its owner even though I’m terrified of them. The dog, not the owner. Even though some owners of dogs are terrifying. I have been in love with you for so long, I forgot how it feels not loving you. I look back at those times when you were not in my life and even back then I knew I was missing something. And when he-who-must-not-be-named showed up and swept you off your feet away from me, I was broken beyond repair. But you came back and made me hope that maybe, maybe all my dreams could become true. But you were hurt and also broken, and you needed time to heal. You still do. I shouldn’t have said anything, but you’re just so fucking amazing that I struggle to not scream ‘I Love You’ every time you breathe. I am utterly in love with you and hopelessly devoted to you. I understand if you still need time to heal or would rather be with someone else. But I said it, and I do not intend on taking it back.”

She was kneeling on the couch, her hands still clutching his, tears streaming down her face.

“Don’t take it back.”

Rhys thought he had heard what he wanted, so he had to ask, “What?”, a dumbstruck disbelieving-his-luck expression plastered on his face.

“I said don’t take it back. I feel the same way. I am utterly in love with you and hopelessly devoted to you too. I thought you hated me after, well, Tamlin. It is pleasant knowing we reciprocate each other’s feelings.”

Feyre laughed again, breaking the spell between them. Only, now the deed was done. Neither of them could hold their emotions in any longer. Feyre leaned in and so did Rhys, and their lips met halfway in a once in a lifetime, epic romance, Full on Princess Bride type of kiss.

After they both ran out of breath, they simply remained connected in every way possible given their awkward position. Foreheads never leaving each other, hands clasped together, lips barely touching. That spell, though, didn’t last for long. Soon they yearned to touch each other’s skin and feel each other’s bodies.

They were never going to have enough of each other.

[shealynn88]

Inktober/Suptober Masterpost

Inktober/Suptober masterpost, see all the links under the cut, with thoughts and feelings, etc.  Thanks to the wonderful @winchester-reload​ who organized and inspired this SPN focused list.

There is so much here!  I italicized days that I personally was really pleased with, and that I recommend checking out in more detail.

Day 1: Ring (inktober), Autumn (suptober) - I wanted to start with very simple drawings.  I think this was a good start and I really ended up liking my idea for Autumn, which is always a sort of melancholy time for me, and I think that feather really came across melancholy and autumnal. Day 2: Eyes (suptober) and Mindless (inktober) - I was able to combine the prompts and this was my first real attempt at hatching.  I wanted the focus on the eye and I think the composition was good for that.  I can definitely see how much I improved from here, though. Day 3: Bait - really simple but I think really effective.  I love drawing hands and I thought this was delicate and beautiful as well as being potentially a little alarming. Day 4: Freeze (inktober) - a very simple portrait of medusa with no reference.  I really like how this came out.  It’s simple but clear and the hatching in the ‘hair’ was really successful, I thought. Day 5: Water - this is the most popular one!  There are issues with it, but I think it’s impactful, and I like the lines of the Leviathans starting to escape, which I added for context and ended up really liking.  I don’t like those grey brush pens, but I’m glad I tried them out, here. Day 6: Outfit of the Day - this was incredibly simple but I think it was really impactful.  I think the hatching and linework is really well done, and the choice of putting these items, now out of use, on a hanger instead of on Dean was a really good one.  I think it really evokes something sad and nostalgic and I’m so pleased with that. Day 9: Baby - Another really difficult one I’m really happy with.  I spent a ton of time on it and I’m really pleased with the textures and shadows.  Despite there being so many lines, I feel like the shapes came out well and it’s not too busy. Day 10: Season 15 - I’m so crazy proud of the silhouettes.  I feel like they’re really accurate.  The moon was less successful but I still really enjoy it.  Another one I’d like to redo when I have more time. Day 11: Weapon - Most successful, as far as I’m concerned.  My first work with a dip pen.  The lines are really consistent and even, the composition is flawless, I love what I decided to define and what I didn’t.  It has a great comic book feel to it.  There are of course things that could be better, but I think it’s got a lot of punch. Day 13: Ladies - One of my favorites!  It was fun to combine the Kali from the show with the more standard representation with the skulls and arms. Despite the lack of clothes, she’s not meant to titillate, she’s meant to be feared and revered. Day 14: Fire - I really like the reflection in the eye.  It was meant to be Dean lighting a match, but looks more like Dean about to be set on fire, with the angles of the hand and the expression.  But, even though that’s a happy accident, I like the feel of it and the detail. Day 15: Led Zeppelin - another one where I was really tired, but I like what I did.  It’s extremely simple but I hope it evokes Cas for people. Day 16: Halo - One of my favorites.  Trueform with halo, I loved drawing the animals and having a lot of creative freedom.  I also really enjoyed pulling in some illumination style in the flowers.  I want to redo it at some point and correct some issues because I think it has a ton of promise. Day 17: Limbo - I was really exhausted at this point and had such trouble with the legs, so I just put in some lines and I think it actually worked fairly well.  It was a good exercise in ‘doing it anyway’, even though I was worn out. Day 22: Love - I don’t feel like the execution is great, but I’m really proud of this one.  It was my first with no pose reference (I used some face references) and I think the wash effects were pretty decent here, too. Day 23: No Exit - Sam hallucinates in the panic room.  I had a good reference photo and I really liked how this came out.  This was done with micron pen and a brush pen for the marks on the floor. Day 24: Nightmare - Execution-wise, this fell short for me.  With more time, I would have tried doing a background and trying to define the hellhound with the blood and changing the line weight and possible direction of the items behind her.  I just ran out of time and energy with this one.  MIcron and brush pens. Day 26: Wish - I love the concept for this but I wasn’t completely happy with the composition.  I worked from two references but had trouble getting them to work together. I also forgot the bottom of the rosary.  Microns. Day 28: Makeup - I went with a punk Castiel with eyeliner and lipstick.  It’s very simple but I’m really happy with it.  This was done with a dip pen and it was my favorite nib, which promptly stopped working after this piece. Day 29: Poison - This was the most I’ve done with ink washes, and I don’t feel great about them, but it was an interesting endeavor.  It also looks nothing like Ruby.  Dip pen and brush. Day 30: Kansas - this was my first ink landscape, and inspired mainly by the incredible dark wincest fic Willing, which I highly, highly recommend.  Dip pen. Day 31: Halloween - the only digital art I did for the challenge, and it was quite late, too.  But I really love it.  Cas’s look on the show is actually based on Constantine, which makes it extra funny (to me).  I love this because I didn’t have a pose reference, though I did check on Misha’s face after I had it mostly complete, to help dial in on some of his facial features.

Tagging: @midnightsilver​ @legendary-destiel​ @all-or-nothing-baby​ @petrichoravellichor​

[wellfuckthisshitagain]

Supernatural S15 E6 Golden Time

Totally missed last episode 🤐🤐

Is that a picture of Rowen ?? 🔍🔎🔍

She remind me of Abaddon 💭

Dad Jokes Dean ! 🤣🤣 my heart ❤❤

I swear I saw a blur next to Sam. I'm watching way too much Chills or Top15s YouTube channel. 🙃🙃

Ohjj ok the blur wasn't a glitch on my screen it was in show !! 😲😲

So Dean became more of a fan of Scooby Doo since he lived in their universes 😁😁

Aww Cas talking about Dean ! 😚😋😋😋

Cas character development- he learning proper "people skills" 😎😎

Eileen 👧👧

Sam being Rowena kin 👸🔜🤴

The lady with the book - ugh 🤓😒😒

Agent who?? 🤔

Eileen deserves better. Always 👼👼👼

I love how Sam learn ASL even after she died 😚😚❤❤❤

Wait. What ?? Who was Little-Red-Riding-Hood-Wanna-be talking too and is 🤔👿

Sheriff went to get a hair cut but he's bold 🤥🤥🤥🤥

Come on Dean back him up 🤠🤠🤠🤠

I love you Dean 💓💓💓

Did Dean send him a apology voice message ????? 🤔📲📲📲

Aww Eileen ! My girl 🎉🎉

I knew there was a secret in that book of hers ! 📚📚📚

Rowena was Smart and beautiful! 😗😗👸👸👸👸

What was the paper ??? 🤔📄📃📄📃

Ohhh Sam wants to make Eileen real again !! I love him ! 😍😍😍😍

Cas and those Dom-Brows 😎😎

Sam no !! He's gonna die like the girl ! 😣😣

Who the fuck these bitches ?? 😡😡

Her hair pretty though 🙄🙄🙄🙄

Her daughter name Lucinda???? That name is so special in my family 😀😀

Dean better get off his butt and go help his brother or Cas ! 😐😐

Come on Sam you could grab that thing right out of her hand with no sweat 💪💪👀

Emily girl look like a ghost herself. Sure she isn't the one that's dead ?? She still look invisible 💀☠👻💀💀

Cas talking about Dean and Sam as colleague 🤣🤣🤣🤣🕵🕵🕵

"Mom" - This is when Cas knew he might have fucked up....👦👦

Emily might have some serious psychological problem 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 She is not okay.

The fuck is this guy ?! 😳😳😳😳

"You selfish little men of authority " 👊👊👊

Dean !! 🙌🙌🙌🙌

AHHHH EILEEN !! 🙆🙆🙆

"Not today, bitch " so badass Eileen 👧💪💪👧 !

Come on Sam !! 😫😫

Yea Sammy !! 🙌

Hurry Dean!! 🏁🏁🏁

He fucking lighter had to be a bitch 🛢🚭🚭

They always do that. Make the freaking lighter or match not light when it's bloody needed🛇🛇🚭🚭🚭🛇🛇☡☡

Why is Cas slowly getting weaker ? 😞😞😞

Cas always helping others just like Misha 💙💙💙

I hope it works !!! 🙁🙁🙁

And they end up together. Romantically 😚😍😍😍😘😘😘😘😘

No lie Sam sound sexy saying that 😍🎶👂

Aww he turned around cause he knew she might be naked. So respectful 🤗🤗🤗

That scene would have been so sexy and romantic under different circumstances 😍😍😍😘😘😘😘😘😘

Yes girl grab on to him ! Grab onto him for the rest of us 💪🤜🤜✊👅👅👅

Ahhh Sammy ! So inspirational 😄😄😄

I need your brother too 😁😁😁😁

[preface2adreamplay]

Under Your Spell (Part 10) - Ashes On My Shoes

Summary: A Jared Padalecki/OFC fiction.

Stef is a musician, recently gone solo. Happy with her life as a forever single person until Jared makes it his mission to get close to her. (For the purpose of this fiction, I have liberated some lyrics from various artists and their videos. This is fiction, with real people mentioned.)

Chapter warnings: Flirting, swearing. 

Chapter WC: 2,458

The night of the Texas show was here. Stef was always nervous for every gig, why wouldn’t she be? There were a hundred and one ways that things could go sideways. Most of them had already happened during her career. But Jared would be at this show. He had text her to say he was incoming, ’With the boys.’ She assumed Jensen would be joining him. 

The bus was parked up next to the venue, the first of bands that were playing with them had started their set. Stef was already dressed for the stage, usually she kept it simple enough but tonight she made a special effort to be a little more flamboyant. Claire had helped her put together this flowing ensemble. A dress with a plunging neckline that just about reached to her navel, long sleeves and a train of black and silver material that followed her around as she walked. It was a flirty, Morticia Addams inspired dress with a slit up the front that came up to her knees. When she moved it dragged behind her, showing off her long legs. 

The legs that Jared had kissed and ran his fingers up and down teasingly the last time they were together. He said he loved her legs. She loved them when they were wrapped around his waist.

‘Focus, Stef.’ she scolded herself in the hand held mirror she used to put on her make up. 

Just then her tour manager pulled open the door, shouting ‘you decent?’

‘Yeah, come on in,’ Stef had one more coat of mascara to do and she was done.

‘Wow, you look great. You going on a date afterwards?’ Jeff was cool, he was a friend from years back, from the beginning. Always a good guy to have with you on tour. You needed a snack at 3am, he got it. You needed a replacement guitar string before you ran on stage, he had it ready. 

‘Maybe.’

Jeff carried on with his checklist, talking to himself more than to her.

‘Your stuff is on stage, the band are hanging in the waiting room. You staying on the bus?’ 

‘Nah, I’m going to go in now.’

‘Just so you know there are some fans at the gate, waiting for you.’

There were always a few people hanging around the venue before her shows. The first time she got off a bus with people shouting her name was definitely one of the highlights of the business for her. They were the reason why she still did shows. Her fans were always hungry for more music.

Recognising a few of the faces in the crowd, Stef hung with them for a few minutes.

They were complimentary about her ‘new style,’ asking if it was for the new album.

She agreed, butterflies nesting in her stomach again at the thought that she had made this effort just for Jared. What had become of her?

Smiling and doing her best poses with the fans, she waved them goodbye. Promising to give them a shoutout from the stage.

The venue was packed. Though she put that down to the most excellent support acts that were with her. Slipping into the backstage area through the rear entrance, she noticed her band mates were rowdy. 

‘What is it about the Texas crowds that get you guys so wound up?’ She laughed, watching the empty mini bottles of Jager tumble down from their ludicrous game of dominoes. 

‘What is it about Texas that’s got you looking like that?’ Evan queried, the boys wolf whistled. 

‘Settle down.’ She scolded. Forever the mother. These guys had been around nearly as long as Jeff. She found them all adorable and annoying, referring to them as her ‘hairy ass babies.’

Curing her nerves with two glasses of whiskey, she saw the second support act coming backstage, sweaty and loud. 

They’d be up next. 

Jeff appeared again, ‘Hey Stef, c’mere.’ 

‘Your friends just arrived,’ he said in a hushed tone, nodding his head towards Jared and Jensen. Misha stepped out from behind the two taller men and waved energetically. ‘Hey!’ he called across the corridor at her.

Stef ushered them into the room. Giving Jensen and Jared a hug and a kiss on both cheeks. Jared was smiling from ear to ear, but said nothing.

‘Hey hot momma,’ Jensen tried to keep a straight face, glancing at Jared. ‘Can’t wait for the show. We brought this idiot, he loves your music too.’

‘I’m a new fan.’ Misha pulled her into a tight hug. ‘Not as big a fan as Jared, but I still love your stuff.’ 

Misha seemed to be a guy you could instantly like. Stef patted him on the back, letting him know that the hug was done. 

’Sorry, I’m excited to meet you. Jared talks about you non stop.’

‘Do I?’ Jared was looking at Stef, taking her in, his eyes pausing on all the right places of the dress. 

‘You do, actually.’ Jensen clapped his friend on the back. ‘Come on, let’s get ready for this show then.’ He gave Misha a playful push out the door and threw Jared a look that said ‘hurry up.’

When they had disappeared, Jeff pointing the way up to the box Stef had booked for them, Jared was still standing over her. ‘You look beautiful.’

She could feel herself getting a little bashful. ‘Thank you,’ she replied, deciding it was best to just say it rather than pass it off as ‘this old thing?’

‘Good luck, I can’t wait to see you play.’ He leaned in and gave her a quick peck on the lips. That surprised her, she didn’t think he wanted to advertise that they were somewhat ‘together.’ 

‘I can’t wait to play for you.’ Stef smiled, giving his chin a little tug. 

‘You got about five minutes,’ Jeff came back and took Jared by the arm, leading him out of the door. 

With the lights glaring into her face, she could never see the crowd. That often helped with her nerves. Being up there made her feel so vulnerable, that was why she loved doing it so much. It was like therapy, pouring her heart out into the songs and letting them take over. The crowd were waiting impatiently when the lights went down. It was her cue to walk on stage. The guys were at their instruments, playing the intro to the new single. Stef reached the mic as the beat kicked in, her words flowing easily. Everything sounded right. In the moment, she forgot everyone around her. Forgot about Jared sitting forward in his seat taking in the show, watching her move with the music, doubled over when the high notes required it. 

There was little time to chat between songs, Stef preferred it that way. It was easier to just get on with it. 

She hated the ‘hey there..*insert city* you’re the best.’

Halfway through the set, she thanked the crowd for coming out, introduced the band and pulled out her acoustic guitar. 

‘This isn’t usual for me, I like to kick it full steam ahead for you guys. But, someone recently sang this song to me and it revived some old feelings. Despair and lost love. Sounds good, right?’ The crowd whooped and cheered.

‘Ok, cool.’ Stef started right into the song, keeping the pace that Jared had set when he sang it to her on the floor of Jensen’s cabin the night they first made love. 

Burning soft skin of two

Trying hard to let go of you

Hoping it will do

Pulled right out from underneath you

She heard the crowd singing it along with her, her breath caught in her throat when she finished the song, pushing her guitar aside and holding up her hands in thanks to the fans. 

‘You know what, I don’t usually say this, but y’all ARE the fuckin’ best.’ 

Backstage, everyone was in high spirits. The whiskey was flowing and Stef was so buzzed. Misha was taking pictures of the band, wanting her to strike some ridiculous poses with Jensen and Jared.

Several of the shots made it on to instagram. Jared and ‘the boys,’ each posted a picture with Stef, exclaiming about how great the show had been and how excited they were to be invited backstage.

Stef even posted one with Misha, Jensen and Jared holding her up as she lay across them. There were so many comments on it, she just didn’t have the energy to read them.

Back on the bus, the guys were continuing their little party in the ‘living area’ behind the driver. Jared had come back with Stef to have a chat before they had to go.

Checking that no one was watching, Stef pulled him halfway into her tiny bunk, there was no way the both of them would fit in there but they managed to squeeze in, legs dangling out from behind the curtain. Giggling like teenagers, they made out for a while. Jared punctuating each kiss with how much he enjoyed the show. Eventually, after several phone calls from an increasingly pissed Jensen, Jared took his leave. Kissing her wrist to her shoulder and then giving her several kisses that made her head spin, he left. 

‘Stefanie’s got a boyfriend!’ One of the guys stuck his head out through the sliding door of the living area, he was so drunk he could barely stand. 

‘Shut the fuck up,’ Stef threw a pair of his balled up socks at him. ‘And clean up after your-damn-selves.’ 

The next day they were playing a much smaller venue, but the crowds were still coming out, thankfully.

Stef had taken a moment to look at her tagged posts on social media. There were a few great shots taken the night before, she was incredibly grateful her tits didn’t pop out of her dress. 

‘Wow, you know J2?’ ‘OMG Jensen’ ‘OMG Jared’. Was how most of the comments were going. Several were suggesting she was fucking one of them, or all three.

‘She sucks, her music sucks and she’s ugly.’ Charming. Stef often deleted the nasty ones, coz who wants to see them, right? 

There were more followers on all platforms, that was nice. More people to hear the music, she supposed.

Her heart skipped a beat on seeing a post on insta from Jared. It was a picture of them striking a ridiculous pose, his arm around her waist. They were doing their best blue steel. The second was a shot of him, Jensen and Misha heads together at the show and the third was Stef on stage, she couldn’t recall what part of the night it was. 

‘If anyone gets a chance to see this girl live, go see her. You rocked us last night, Stef. So proud of you.’ Several love hearts.

Misha commented, ‘get your hands off my girl, Jared.’

Jared: ‘And how long do you know her that you think you can lay claim?’

Jensen posted several laughing emojis, ‘as MJ said boys, ‘the girl is mine.’

Stef liked each of the comments. Adding her own ‘I’d take all three of you, no problem.’ To which Jared added a sad face and a broken heart. 

Her phone began vibrating, the long stream of comments disappearing. Oscar’s name was flashing on screen.

‘Hello, Oscar.’ Her voice was a little husky from the night before.

‘There she is. I see your show was well received last night.’

‘Oh?’ She feigned ignorance. 

‘There is a write up about it already, some fans of Supernatural are getting quite excited about it. You wouldn’t happen to know anyone from the show would you?’

‘Maybe.’

She heard Oscar sighing down the phone where there would usually be laughter.

‘You better not be messing around with a married man, Effie.’

‘Why would that be any of your fucking business, Oscar?’

‘I thought as much, you won’t deny it either. I noticed something about you when you came down for Dar’s party.’

‘You noticed what?’

‘Well, don’t get me wrong you are always lovely but you were simply glowing when you arrived at the airport.’

‘Oh shut up, you’re so full of crap.’

‘Am I?’

She supposed he wasn’t. But again, she didn’t want to tell him he was right. 

‘Yeah, your silence speaks volumes.’

‘I’m a big girl, Oscar. I look out for myself. Always have.’

The last two words stung him and she knew it. He shifted in his chair, she heard him clear his throat the way he always did, before he wanted to launch into a speech about how she was getting herself into trouble.

’Before you start, because I know what you’re going to say!’ She warned, hearing him start to tell her to watch herself.

‘I appreciate your concern, but I’m not getting myself into anything I haven’t thought about for many sleepless nights. We have...an agreement.’

Oscar scoffed, ‘so you’re fucking a married man. That’s fine is it?’

‘It is for us, Oscar. Please don’t judge me.’

‘I can’t not judge you. What’s with you lately? You’re not really acting like yourself.’

‘Hey, you told me I needed to loosen up a bit.’

‘Loosening up a little means go out with your friends more and have some fun. Not start a relationship with a married guy. A famous married one at that. Jesus, Stef, you have to be more careful.’

‘Oscar, I appreciate the concern.’

‘That’s it? No fighting back?’

‘I don’t want to fight, not with you. I can’t fight with you anymore.’

Oscar was sighing again. ‘Promise me, you’ll be sensible. I can’t stand seeing you broken hearted.’

‘Oh don’t start that shit again, please.’ Stef buried her face in the crook of her arm, laying across her bunk. 

‘I mean it, Stefanie. Don’t do that to yourself, you’re worth more than that. You’re more than a mistress.’

‘I know that. And as I said, it works for both of us right now.’

‘Yeah, yeah sure. You frustrate me so much, you know that?’

‘I do. It’s why you love me though.’ 

Perhaps she had chosen the wrong words, his voice which had been pleading was now just sad.

‘Fuck sakes. I’m shaking my head right now, but you can’t see me.’

Stef bit her nails, ‘yeah but I can imagine it, vividly. You still got that nice head of hair?’

‘Yep, I’m shaving it off as soon as this movie is done.’

‘I hate your bald head.’ Stef complained.

‘I am doing it just to annoy you, and I will be sending pictures.’

‘Ugh, delete me from your life please.’

‘Never,’ he smiled a little, ‘I gotta go.’

‘Later Oscar.’

‘Goodbye, love.’

CHAPTER 11