#minura's... something

[just-miru]

have my cringe flop posts and unrelated kitty cat pics made you fall in love with me yet

[ehliena]

FilAms referring to the Philippines as the acronym PI while they are calling homelanders for the use of Filipinx and Pinxy is peak irony. That is without adding these two facts: the letter F is a loaned letter in Tagalog from the oppressors (and its corresponding phoneme too) and that the demonym is an appellation to Felipe II of Spain. And for someone like me who reads and writes in Baybayin since age 15, to write a Baybayin X seems like a dark humor scene in a Taika Waititi comedy. (Yes, I do Baybayin shiz for fun, but not as serious as Kristian Kabuay and NordenX.)

I first encountered PI among FilAms during Christmas vacation 2002 in LA; and Pilipinx when I joined the theatrical production of a FilAm musical at CalState East Bay in 2016. I understand that it is their culture and I respect it, and I assimilate. I easily assimilate with what I call my Nickelodeon voice, which I have acquired from when jailbroken cable services became a thing in Mega Manila and through my theatre background. But when in Rome, we live the Roman way, so as the Santa Mesa-born foreigner, I have to hide that dark laughter every single time someone uses PI.

But of course, 2020 had to make us see PI-using FilAms pressuring homelander to use Filipinx, citing political correctness and gender neutrality (while white American Pemberton, the killer of Filipino transwoman Jennifer Laude, was given an absolute pardon by Duterte).

So, let us start my TEDtalk.

P.I. is a colloquial acronym for Putanginamo (the equivalent of Fuck You) used by conservative Filipinos who probably are only retelling a story.

Tsismosa 1: “Minura ni Aling Biring si Ka Boying.” (Aling Biring cursed Ka Boying)

Tsismosa 2: “Oh? Ano ika?” (Really? What did she say?)

Tsismosa 1: “Malutong at umaatikabong PI.” (A hard and surging PI.)

Then I imagine PI as the curse when FilAms say some sentences:

“Are you flying back to Putangina?”

“I miss Putangina. We went to Boracay.”

“Duterte is President of Putangina.”

But it’s fine with me. I understand they mean well and I know that Americans, as first world as they are, have poor grasp of history. It’s a little sad though that FilAms have not always been reminded of this special footnote in the history of the United States:

P.I. stands for Philippine Islands. That’s the colonial name of the Philippines as a commonwealth republic under the United States, which the republic stopped using when the 1935 Constitution was enacted in 1946. Yes, in case people are forgetting, the Philippines has long been a state with full sovereignty recognized by the United Nations (of which we are a founding member of and wherein Carlos Romulo served as President) and recognized by Shaider Pulis Pangkalawakan.

Also, RP is used to refer to the Republic of the Philippines before the use of the standard two-letter country code PH.

I’m not saying FilAms should stop using PI to refer to the Philippines but I’m saying that the roots of that practice is from American oppression that homelanders have already cancelledttt.

Our oldest bank in the Philippines is BPI. It stands for Bank of the Philippine Islands, originally named El Banco Español Filipino de Isabel II because it was founded during Queen Isabella II’s reign. It was a public bank by then; perhaps comparable to the Federal Reserve. Upon its privatization during the American occupation, the bank started using BPI for the sake of branding because it was the Americans who christened us with P.I. (I have a theory that Manila was a character in Money Heist because the Royal Mint of Spain used to have a branch in the Philippines and operated very closely with BPI. And my other supernatural theory is that our translation of peso which is ‘piso’ affects our economy. ‘Piso’ means ‘floor’ or ‘flat’ in Spanish.)

Now, going back. To me, P.I. is more appropriate an acronym for the ethnic group of Pacific Islanders. I don't think I need to explain further why. These would be the natives of Hawai’i, Guam, Tuvalu, Kiribati, and other islands in the Oceania continent, and maybe even New Zealand. If a curious FilAm raises a question of whether Filipinos are Pacific Islanders or Asians or Hispanics, the answer is long but easy to understand.

The Filipinos live in a group of islands within the Pacific Plate. The Philippines is an Asian country, following conventions of geopolitical continental borders from the other. We are Hispanics by virtue of being under Spain for three fucking centuries. And Teresita Marquez is Reina Hispanoamericana because why not? (We could’ve been a part of America still if not for the efforts of Quezon.) So, the quick answer is that the Filipino is all of it.

Yes, the Filipinos have an affinity with the Pacific through nature and geography. Think of the earthquakes, volcanoes, flora and fauna, and the coconuts. And they even look like us. The earlier inhabitants of the archipelago were Pacific Islanders who were introduced to Hinduism and Buddhism as being closer to the cradles of civilization India and China. Then, the Islamic faith has grown along with the rise of the kingdoms and polities in Southeast Asia. The Spaniards arrived in the archipelago, to an already civilized Islamic polity - too civilized that they understood how diplomacy is necessary in war. We knew that it resulted to the defeat and death of Magellan who was fighting for Rajah ‘Don Carlos’ Humabon. Then came the 333 years of being under Spain AND (sic) the Catholic Church which made us more Hispanic. Our Austronesian/Malayo-Polynesian languages (Tagalog, Bisaya, Kapampangan, Ilocano, Bikol, Waray, Cuyonon, etc.) have kept our Asian identity intact - unlike Latin American countries where the official language of each is one of the Romance languages; thus "Latin".

(It is only towards the end of that 333-year Spanish rule that the 'Filipino' emerged to be something the oppressed could claim, and for that we thank the poet in Jose Rizal. I see a parallel in how Christians claimed the cross, the former symbol of criminals in Jewish tradition, to become the symbol of God’s love and salvation through Jesus. Wow. That’s so UST of me. Lol.)

You add into the mix that our diaspora is so large and identifiable, the data gatherers decided to mark the tables with “Filipino” - too Asian to be Hispanic and Pacific, too Pacific to be Hispanic and Asian, and too Hispanic to be Asian and Pacific.

What many FilAms do not realize everyday is that unlike the words Blacks, Latinx, Asians, or Pacific Islanders, or Hispanics, the word Filipino is not just a word denoting an ethnic group. At its highest technical form, the word Filipino is a word for the citizenship of a sovereign nation, enshrined in the constitution of a free people whose history hinges on the first constitutional republic in Asia.

By state, we mean a sovereign nation and not a federal state. (Well, even with Chinese intervention, at the very least we try.)

By state, we mean we are a people with a national territory, a government, and a legal system inspired by the traditions of our ancestors and oppressors. It may be ugly, but it is ours, and we have the power to change it.

This one may be as confusing as Greek-Grecian-Greco-Hellenic-Hellene, but let’s examine the word 'Filipino' further when placed side by side with related words.

*Pilipinas is the country; official name: Republika ng Pilipinas. It is translated into English as “Philippines”; official name: Republic of the Philippines. Spanish translates it into “Filipinas”, the Germans “Philippinen”, the French “Les Philippines”, the Italians “Filippine”.

*Pilipino refers to the people. It is translated into English as Filipino. The plural forms are ‘mga Pilipino’ and ‘Filipinos’.

*Philippine is an English adjective relating to the Philippines, commonly used for official functions. It may be used as an alternative to the other western adjective ‘Filipino’ but the interchangeability is very, very nuanced. Filipino people not Philippine people. Filipino government and Philippine government. Philippine Embassy, Filipino embassy, not Filipino Embassy. Tricky, eh?

*Filipino also refers to the official language of the state (which is basically Tagalog).

*Filipiniana refers to Philippine-related books and non-book materials (cultural items, games, fashion, etc.) which could be produced by Filipinos or non-Filipinos, inside or outside the Philippines.

*Pinoy is a colloquial gender-neutral demonym; comparable to how New Zealanders use the word Kiwi.

The demonym Filipino has evolved from that of referring only to Spaniards in the Philippines into becoming the term for the native people who choose to embrace the identity of a national.

It started from when Jose Rizal wrote his poem “A la juventud filipina” and he emerged as an inspiration to the Philippine Revolution through Andres Bonifacio’s leadership. (But take note of ‘filipina’ because ‘juventud’ is a feminine word in Spanish.)

Today, no less than the 1987 Philippine Constitution, which was neither written by Hamilton nor a group of straight white men but by people of different faiths, genders, disabilities, and skin colors, in its first five words in both Filipino and English versions read: "Kami, ang nakapangyayaring sambayanang Pilipino", translated as "We, the sovereign Filipino people” validates the legitimacy of the word as gender-neutral, alive, aware and awake with our history of struggles.

Article 14 Section 7 of the current Constitution says Filipino is the national language. And while I agree that it is not really a real language but an alias for Tagalog, it is a conscientious codification of a social norm during the time of Manuel Quezon as he is aiming for the world to recognize the unified Filipinos as a sovereign people. People. Not men. Not heterosexual men. People.

It is a non-issue for the homeland Filipino that the word Filipino refers to the people and the language. But FilAms are concerned of political correctness due to an understandable cultural insecurity also felt by other non-whites in the US. And there is added confusion when FilAms pattern the word Filipino after the patriarchal Spanish language, without learning that the core of the grammars of Philippine languages are gender-neutral. The Tagalog pronoun "siya" has no gender. "Aba Ginoong Maria" is proof that the Tagalog word 'ginoo' originally has no gender. Our language is so high-context that we have a fundamental preposition: “sa”.

It is difficult to be a person of color in the United States especially in these times of the white supremacy’s galling resurgence. Well, it’s not like they have been gone, but this time, with Trump, especially, it’s like the movement took steroids and was given an advertising budget. But for FilAms to force Filipinx into the Philippines, among homeland Filipinos, is a rather uneducated move, insensitive of the legacies of our national heroes and magnificent leaders.

The FilAm culture and the Filipino homeland culture are super different, nuanced. It’s a different dynamic for a Latinx who speak Spanish or Portuguese or whatever their native language is - it reminds entitled white English-speaking America of their place in the continent. It should remind a racist white man whose roots hail from Denmark that his house in Los Angeles stands on what used to be the Mexican Empire.

Let’s use a specific cultural experience by a Black person for example: the black person not only has Smith or Johnson for their last name, but there is no single easy way for them to retrieve their family tree denoting which African country they were from, unless the Slave Trade has data as meticulous as the SALN forms. Let’s use a specific cultural experience by a Mexican-American with Native American heritage: the person is discriminated by a white US Border Patrol officer in the border of Texas. Texas used to be part of Mexico. Filipinos have a traceable lineage and a homeland.

Filipinos and FilAms may be enjoying the same food recipes, dancing the same cultural dance for purposes of presentations every once in a while, but the living conditions, the geography, the languages, social experiences, the human conditions are different, making the psychology, the politics, the social implications more disparate than Latinxs like Mexicans and Mexican Americans.

I don’t know if it is too much advertising from state instruments or from whatever but FilAms don’t realize how insensitive they have become in trying to shove a cultural tone down the throats of the citizens of the republic or of those who have closer affinity to it. And some Filipino homelanders who are very used to accommodating new global social trends without much sifting fall into the trap of misplaced passions.

To each his own, I guess. But FilAms should read Jose Rizal’s two novels, Carlos Romulo’s “I am a Filipino”, materials by Miriam Defensor Santiago (not just the humor books), speeches of Claro Recto, books by historians Gregorio Zaide, Teodoro Agoncillo, Renato Constantino, Nick Joaquin, Regalado Trota Jose, Fidel Villaroel, Zeus Salazar, Xiao Chua, and Ambeth Ocampo, and really immerse themselves in the struggle of the Filipino for an unidentifiable identity which the FilAms confuse for the FilAm culture. That’s a little weird because unlike Blacks and the Latinx movement, the Philippines is a real sovereign state which FilAms could hinge their history from.

I have to be honest. The homelanders don’t really care much about FilAm civil rights heroes Philip Vera Cruz and Larry Itliong, or even Alice Peña Bulos, because it was a different fight. But the media can play a role sharing it, shaping consensus and inadvertently setting standards. (But it’s slightly different for Peña Bulos, as people are realizing she was already a somebody in the Philippines before becoming a who’s who in the US, which is somehow similar to the case of Lea Salonga who was not only from the illustrious Salonga clan, but was also already a child star.) How much do Filipino millennials know about Marcoses, Aquinos? Maybe too serious? Lol. Then, let’s try using my favorite examples as a couch potato of newer cultural materials accessible to FilAms - cultural materials on television and internet.

FilAms who only watched TFC wondered who Regine Velasquez was when ABSCBN welcomed her like a beauty queen. Those with the GMA Pinoy TV have a little idea. But they did not initially get why the most successful Filipino artist in the US, Lea Salonga, does not get that level of adulation at home that Velasquez enjoys. Was it just Regine’s voice? No. Well, kinda, maybe, because there is no question that she is a damn good singer with God knows how many octaves, but it is the culture she represents as a probinsyana who made it that far and chose to go back home and stay - and that’s already a cultural nuance Filipinos understand and resonate with, without having to verbalize because the Philippines is a high-context culture in general, versus the US which is low-context culture in general. I mean, how many Filipinos know the difference of West End and Broadway, and a Tony and an Olivier? What does a Famas or a Palanca mean to a FilAm, to a Filipino scholar, and to an ordinary Filipino? Parallel those ideas with "Bulacan", "Asia", "Birit", "Songbird".

You think Coach Apl.de.Ap is that big in the Philippines? He was there for the global branding of the franchise because he is an American figure but really, Francis Magalona (+) and Gloc9 hold more influence. And speaking of influence, do FilAms know Macoy Dubs, Lloyd Cadena (+) and the cultures they represent? Do FilAms know Aling Marie and how a sari-sari store operates within a community? Do FilAms see the symbolic functions of a makeshift basketball (half)courts where fights happen regularly? How much premium do FilAms put on queer icons Boy Abunda, Vice Ganda? Do FilAms realize that Kris Aquino's role in Crazy Rich Asians was not just to have a Filipino in the cast (given that Nico Santos is already there) but was also Kris Aquino's version of a PR stunt to showcase that Filipinos are of equal footing with Asian counterparts if only in the game of 'pabonggahan'? Will the FilAms get it if someone says ‘kamukha ni Arn-arn’? Do FilAms see the humor in a Jaclyn Jose impersonation? Do FilAms even give premiums to the gems Ricky Lee, Peque Gallaga, Joel Lamangan, Joyce Bernal, Cathy Garcia Molina, and Jose Javier Reyes wrote and directed? (And these are not even National Artists.) How about AlDub or the experience of cringing to edgy and sometimes downright disgusting remarks of Joey De Leon while also admiring his creative genius? Do FilAms understand the process of how Vic Sotto became ‘Bossing’ and how Michael V could transform into Armi Millare? Do FilAms get that Sexbomb doesn’t remind people of Tom Jones but of Rochelle? Do FilAms get that dark humor when Jay Sonza’s name is placed beside Mel Tiangco’s? What do FilAms associate with the names ‘Tulfo’, ‘Isko’, ‘Erap’, ‘Charo’, ‘Matet’, ‘Janice’, ‘Miriam’, ‘Aga’, ‘Imelda’ and ‘Papin’? Do FilAms get that majority of Filipinos cannot jive into Rex Navarette’s and Jo Koy’s humor but find the comic antics of JoWaPao, Eugene Domingo, Mr Fu, Ryan Rems, and Donna Cariaga very easy to click with? Do FilAms know Jimmy Alapag, Jayjay Helterbrand, Josh Urbiztondo? Oh wait, these guys are FilAms. Lol. Both cultures find bridge in NBA, but have these FilAms been to a UAAP, NCAA, or a PBA basketball game where the longstanding rival groups face each other? Do FilAms know the legacy of Ely Buendia and the Eraserheads? Do FilAms know about Brenan Espartinez wearing this green costume on Sineskwela? Do FilAms know how Kiko Matsing, Ate Sienna, Kuya Bodjie helped shape a generation of a neoliberal workforce?

That list goes on and on, when it comes to this type of Filipiniana materials on pop culture, and I am sure as Shirley Puruntong that while the homeland Filipino culture is not as widespread, it has depth in its humble and high-context character.

Now, look at the practical traffic experiences of the homelanders. People riding the jeepneys, the tricycles, the MRT/LRT, the buses, and the kolorum - the daily Via Crucis of Mega Manila only Filipinos understand the gravity of, even without yet considering the germs passed as the payments pass through five million other passengers before reaching the front. Add the probinsyas, people from periphery islands who cross the sea to get good internet connections or do a checkup in the closest first-class town or component city. Do FilAms realize that the largest indoor arena in the world is built and owned by Iglesia ni Cristo, a homegrown Christian church with a headquarters that could equal the Disney castle?

Do FilAms know the experience as a tourist's experience or as an experience a homelander want to get away from or at least improved?

Do FilAms understand how much an SM, a Puregold, or a Jollibee, Greenwich, Chowking branch superbly change a town and its psychology and how it affects the Pamilihang Bayan? Do FilAms realize that while they find amusement over the use of tabo, the homelanders are not amused with something so routinary? Do FilAms realize how Filipinos shriek at the thought that regular US households do not wash their butts with soap and water after defecating?

Do FilAms understand the whole concept of "ayuda" or SAP Form in the context of pandemic and politics? The US has food banks, EDDs, and stubs - but the ayuda is nowhere near the first world entitlements Filipinos in the homeland could consider luxury. But, that in itself is part of the cultural nuance.

Do FilAms know that Oxford recognizes Philippine English as a diction of the English language? While we’ve slowly grown out of the fondness for pridyider and kolgeyt, do FilAms know how xerox is still used in the local parlance? Do FilAms know how excruciating it is to read Panitikan school books Ibong Adarna, Florante at Laura under the curriculum, and how light it is to read Bob Ong? Do FilAms realize that Jessica Zafra, with all her genius, is not the ordinary homelander’s cup-of-tea?

Do FilAms know that Filipinos do not sound as bad in English as stereotypes made them believe? Do FilAms really think that Philippines will be a call center capital if our accents sound like the idiolects of Rodrigo Duterte’s or Ninoy Aquino’s Philippine English accent? Do FilAms realize how Ninoy and Cory speak English with different accents? Lea Salonga's accent is a thespian's accent so she could do a long range like that of Meryl Streep if she wants to so she wouldn't be a good example. Pacquiao's accent shows the idiolect unique to his region in southern Philippines. But for purposes of showing an ethnolinguistic detail, I am using President Cory Aquino’s accent when she delivered her historic speech in the US Congress as a more current model of the Philippine English accent.

Do FilAms bother themselves with the monsoons, the humidity, and the viscosity of sweat the same way they get bothered with snowstorms, and heat waves measured in Fahrenheit?

Do FilAms know that not only heterosexual men are accepted in the Katipunan? Do FilAms even know what the Katipunan is? Do FilAms realize that the Philippines had two female presidents and a transwoman lawmaker? Do FilAms take “mamatay nang dahil sa’yo” the same way Filipinos do? Do FilAms know the ground and the grassroots? Do FilAms know the Filipino culture of the homeland?

These are cultural nuances FilAms will never understand without exposure of Philippine society reflected from barrio to lalawigan, from Tondo to Forbes Park. It goes the same way with Filipinos not understanding the cultural weight of Robert Lopez and the EGOT, or Seafood City, or Lucky Chances Casino, or what Jollibee symbolizes in New York, unless they are exposed.

The thing though is that while it is harder for FilAms to immerse to the homeland culture, it is easier for homeland culture to immerse into the FilAm’s because America’s excess extends to the propagation of its own subcultures, of which the FilAm’s is one.

We’re the same yet we’re different. But it should not be an issue if we are serious with embracing diversity. There should not be an issue with difference when we could find a common ground in a sense of history and shared destiny. But it is the burden of the Filipinos with and in power to understand the situation of those who have not.

Nuances. Nuances. Nuances.

And while I believe that changing a vowel into X to promote gender-neutrality has a noble intention, there is no need to fix things that are not broken. Do not be like politicians whose acts of service is to destroy streets and roads and then call for its renovation instead of fixing broken bridges or creating roads where there are none.

The word ‘Filipino’ is not broken. Since Rizal’s use of the term to refer to his Malayan folks, the formal process of repair started. And it is not merely codified, but validated by our prevailing Constitution, which I don’t think a FilAm would care to read, and I cannot blame them. What's in it for a regular FilAm? They wouldn’t read the US Constitution and the Federalist Papers; what more the 1987 Saligang Batas?

The bottomline of my thoughts on this particular X issue is that FilAms cannot impose a standard for Filipinos without going through a deeper, well-thought-out, more arduous process, most especially when the card of gender neutrality and political correctness are raised with no prior and deeper understanding of what it is to be a commoner in the homeland, of what it is to be an ordinary citizen in a barangay, from Bayan ng Itbayat, Lalawigan ng Batanes to Bayan ng Sitangkai, Lalawigan ng Sulu. It is very dangerous because FilAms yield more influence and power through their better access to resources, and yet these do not equate to cultural awareness.

Before Rizal’s political philosophy of Filipino, the ‘Filipino’ refers to a full-blooded Spaniard born in the Philippines, and since Spain follows jus sanguinis principle of citizenship, back then, ‘Filipino’ is as Spaniard as a ‘Madrileño’ (people in Madrid). The case in point is Marcelo Azcárraga Palmero - the Filipino Prime Minister of Spain.

But the word ‘Filipino’ was claimed by Rizal and the ilustrados to refer to whom the Spaniards call ‘indio’. The term was then applied retroactively to those who helped in the struggle. It was only later that Lapu-Lapu, Francisco Dagohoy, Gabriela and Diego Silang, Sultan Kudarat, Lorenzo Ruiz, and GOMBURZA were called Filipinos.

The word 'Filipino' was long fixed by the tears and sweat of martyrs through years of bloody history in the hands of traitors within and oppressors not just of the white race. The word Filipino is now used by men, women, and those who do not choose to be referred to as such who still bears a passport or any state document from the Republic of the Philippines. Whether a homelader is a Kapuso, Kapamilya, Kapatid, DDS, Dilawan, Noranian, Vilmanian, Sharonian, Team Magnolia, Barangay Ginebra, Catholic, Muslim, Aglipayan, Iglesia, Victory, Mormon, IP, OP, SJ, RVM, SVD, OSB, OSA, LGBTQQIP2SAA, etc., the word 'Filipino' is a constant variable in the formula of national consciousness.

Merriam-Webster defines Filipina as a Filipino girl or woman. Still a Filipino. Remember, dictionaries do not dictate rules. Dictionaries provide us with the meaning. To me, the word Filipina solidified as a subtle emphasis to the Philippines as a matriarchal country faking a macho look. But that’s not saying the word Filipino in the language is macho with six-pack.

The word Filipino is not resting its official status on the letter O but in its quiddity as a word and as an idea of a sovereign nation. The words Pilipino, Filipino, and Pinoy are not broken. What is broken is the notion that a Filipino subculture dictates the standard for political correctness without reaching the depth of our own history.

If the Filipinx-Pinxy-Pilipinx movement truly suits the Filipino-American struggle, my heart goes out for it. But my republic, the Philippines, home of the Filipino people, cradle of noble heroes, has no need for it (not just yet, maybe) - not because we don't want change, but because it will turn an already resolved theme utterly problematic. The Filipinos have no need for it, not because we cannot afford to consider political correctness when people are hungry, abused, and robbed off taxes. We could afford to legalize a formal way of Filipino greeting for purposes of national identity. But as far as the Filipinx, it should not be the homeland’s priority.

We may be poor, but we have culture.

From Julius Payàwal Fernandez's post

[throwawayy2526]

minura ko lolo ko. ayoko talagang ginagawa akong tanga. my parents may let it slide kapag nagnanakaw siya ng pera pero yung nakita ko na harap-harapan tapos sinabi pa sakin na hindi raw. tangina lang, anong respe-respeto? huwag mo kong gawing tanga. i do have a big ego kaya di ako nakapagpigil. ang aga aga, namamalengke magulang ko kaya kaming dalawa lang nandito. tinawanan pa ko amputa. the audacity.  it’s not like we deprive him of his needs, he’s been eating like a king. may sarili pa siyang ulam most of the time bcs of his dietary needs and whenever he requests something, we get it for him. there’s no fucking reason to do it. unless bumibili siya ng mga bawal sa kanya. yun yung nakakainis. alam na magkakasakit siya sa mga binibili niya pero okay lang raw yun. as if siya gagastos kapag nagkasakit siya. ang confident niya pa na madami kaming pera eh di naman niya alam financial situation namin. ni hindi nga ko nagpaconfine last month kahit na hirap na hirap na ko nung nagkasakit ako kase alam kong walang pera. i swear the entitlement ng mga matatanda sa mga anak nila.

[wenierose]

ANG MGA KAGILA-GILALAS NA PAKIKIPAGSAPALARAN NI JUAN DELA CRUZ[i] (Sipi)

Jose F. Lacaba

1          Isang gabing madilim

2          puno ng pangambang sumakay sa bus

3          si Juan de la Cruz

4          pusturang-pustura

5          kahit walang laman ang bulsa

6          BAWAL MANIGARILYO BOSS

7          sabi ng konduktora

8          at minura

9          si Juan de la Cruz.

10        Pusturang-pustura

11        kahit walang laman ang bulsa

12        nilakad ni Juan de la Cruz

13        ang buong Avenida[ii]

14        BAWAL PUMARADA

15        sabi ng kalsada

16        BAWAL UMIHI DITO

17        sabi ng bakod

18        kaya napagod

19        si Juan de la Cruz.

20        Nang abutan ng gutom

21        si Juan de la Cruz

22        tumapat sa Ma Mon Luk[iii]

23        inamoy ang mami siopao

24        hanggang sa mabusog.

25        Nagdaan sa Sine Dalisay[iv]

26        tinitigan ang retrato ni Chichay[v]

27        PASSES NOT HONORED TODAY

28        sabi ng takilyera

29        tawa nang tawa.

30        Dumalaw sa Kongreso

31        si Juan de la Cruz

32        MAG-INGAT SA ASO

33        sabi ng diputado.

34        Nagtuloy sa Malakanyang

35        wala namang dalang kamanyang

36        KEEP OFF THE GRASS

37        sabi ng hardinero

38        sabi ng sundalo

39        kay Juan de la Cruz.

48        Pusturang-pustura

49        kahit walang laman ang bulsa

50        naglibot sa Dewey[vi]

51        si Juan de la Cruz

52        PAN-AM BAYSIDE SAVOY THEY SATISFY

53        sabi ng neon.

54        Humikab ang dagat na parang leon

55        masarap sanang tumalon pero

56        BAWAL MAGTAPON NG BASURA

57        sabi ng alon.

58        Nagbalik sa Quiapo

59        si Juan de la Cruz

60        at medyo kinakabahan

61        pumasok sa simbahan

62        IN GOD WE TRUST

63        sabi ng obispo

64        ALL OTHERS PAY CASH.

65        Nang wala nang malunok

66        si Juan de la Cruz

67        dala-dala'y gulok

68        gula-gulanit na ang damit

69        wala pa ring laman ang bulsa

70        umakyat

71        sa Arayat[vii]

72        ang namayat

73        na si Juan de la Cruz.

74        WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE

75        sabi ng PC[viii]

76        at sinisi

77        ang walanghiyang kabataan[ix]

78        kung bakit sinulsulan

79        ang isang tahimik na mamamayan

80        na tulad ni Juan de la Cruz.

[i] sikat na tula noong panahon ng Batas Militar, binibigkas sa mga lansangan noon bilang protesta

[ii] Rizal Avenue sa Maynila

[iii] sikat na restawran ng mga pagkaing Tsino

[iv] sinehan sa Avenida

[v] sikat na komedyante noong panahong isinulat ang tula

[vi] kasalukuyang Roxas Boulevard

[vii] Arayat=bundok na kilala dati bilang pinagtataguan ng mga rebelde

[viii] Philippine Constabulary; Guardia Civil noong panahong iyon

[ix] mga aktibistang estudyanteng nagmumulat sa lipunan

ANALYSIS:

Ang kagilagilalas na pakikipagsapalaran ni Juan dela Cruz was a perfect paradigm for a throwback picture of Marcos regime.The main character plays the Filipino citizens who were deprived from freedom and rights.The persona was constrained at all things that made it seemed breathless to him. All his actions shall follow strict and unjust rules- laws that are not even humane.We all know that the power was held alone by the government. During those years, freedom isn't something that you can just ask for.People are treated with utmost superiority and coercion.And they just continued swallowing these concepts. But then there comes a time when the persona gets tired of absorbing such abuse that he learned to fight.He started gaging with rebellion to battle up with what he sees unjust.

- ALMARIE ORTIZ

[urikang-blog1]

Happy Birthday

Dear KP, I dont know if at this point, we are already in good terms with each other or if we are still apart and that we have decided to be apart, but I just want to greet you Happy 28th Birthday! Another year. Another gift of life and I do hope, na happy ka today. I am writing this on May 20. Second day since we broke up. I am crushed. When you left last Saturday after our fight and after we have decided to break up I felt like the door echoed and I felt the door shut like it shattered my heart to pieces. I sat there for I think an hour and sent you messages of what I felt. To be honest I was really sad to see you take it that easily. Without even asking to talk and to work things out. Just saying okay and leaving. Like it was nothing. For me that is the saddest part na okay ka na. Na okay na sayo na wala nalang tayo. Na yung 3 years na pinagsamahan naten sumuko ka na rin. You didnt even leave a message saying your thoughts or saying sorry. Napagod ka na siguro talaga. But you know, I realized na tama ka. na di si Chenee yung may kasalanan. Tayo and when I say tayo, that involves me as well. Ako. So I am really sorry. I am sorry for being an awful partner to you for the past few months especially nung LDR tayo. Im sorry na minura kita ng ganun. Kung pinaramdam ko na di kita kailangan. I feel like nagsuffer ka ng sobra given na wala ako tapos ganun tayo tapos mdami kang issues na naglabasan while wala ako. Which you have communicated to me and I knew but still inimpose ko parin sayo na ayusin tayo . Kahit sobrang kailangan mo ng support ko. Sorry if I failed at doing that. Sorry if I pushed you away by insisting that we fix things and that we dwell on our issues. I was waiting for you na amuhin ako. To make me feel like you want me and that you are sorry. A gesture of some sort para makabawi ka sa kasalanan mo sa mga masakit mong sinabi at sa ginawa mo. Pero ako di ko inisip na may mali rin ako pero ikaw di ka nagaantay ng gesture from me na bumawi. Gusto mo lang maging okay. Gusto mong maging normal. Para makabangon tayo. para maging maayos. Na alam mo siguro kung gnawa ko siguro hindi tayo umabot sa kung nasan tayo ngayon. Hindi ka siguro naghanap ng comfort ng iba. Kasi nandto ako as your partner para makausap mo. Sorry if I havent been a partner to you. Sorry na pinairal ko yung ego ko yung selfishness ko and for demanding na may gawin ka gaya ng lage mong gnagawa. I cant deny it hinahanap ko talaga yung efforts mo. Dati kasi pag nagaway tayo I will find you sa bahay at the end of the day to patch things up so we can talk or if not you are already up to something at gumising ka pa ng mas maaga sakin para maghanap ng bulaklak at pumunta ng dangwa o magisip ng kung anong pakulo maamo lang ako. Hinanap ko yun. I cried last night kasi akala ko, nasa side ka ng bed ko gaya ng away natin dati. I was hoping na sana totoo. Sana andun ka wanting na maging okay yung mga bagay.  I dont know what happened what made you stop. Was it that you got tired? naubusan ka na ba ng fuel? Dont you feel like Im worthy of that? or na di mo nalang talaga ako mahal gaya ng dati? pero gaya ng sabi ko sayo I am equally responsible for that. You got tired because of me. Because I feel entitled. Because I felt like you have to prove that I am special because you had to always prove something and I understand that is tiring. thinking about it probably it felt like a chore given that you have already established that certain expectation vs siguro na dati freely mo syang gnagawa which is because gusto mo not because gusto ko. Nakakalungkot isipin yung fact na ayaw mo na na gawin yun pero I do understand na oo nakakapagod nga sya. Now regarding Chenee. When I was back tracking your messages I saw that your conversations started yung day na nagaway tayo dahil minessage ko sya. I dont know if you were trying to patch things up/compensate hence you started to message her. na akala ko, sa undertsanding ko di mo gagawin. So that again, I am responsible too. I pushed you to do that. I pushed you to talk to her. And I pushed you to hide it from me by talking somewhere else. It broke my heart when you told her na nasa slack ka lang sa phone. That she can reach you somewhere na wala akong visbility. Like you intended to do that. I dont know if naplant ba sa isip mo na may interest sya sayo so you took the chance? pero to me I felt like she was a threat and I made her a threat and now she is. I have let my insecurities take over me. and so yeah. I pushed you towards her. And now, may ganto na. Nagsinungaling ka na. Tinago mo na. Na kung iisipin mo siguro kung hanyaan ko lang. Siguro walang ganto. Siguro. Pero I wouldnt accept siguro na wala lang sya. Na wala ka lang pake sa kanya kasi obviously sa chats nyo may level of concern ka. na ang hirap tanggapin. and you even defended her. Pero wala na akong magagawa dun. anjan na at Im responsible din. So I do apologize for all of these. For the half ass relationship weve had for almost 3 months now. But I do want you to know na I do care for your happiness. Sorry if I have been really selfish. And youre right you dont just break off things like that like it was nothing. I have loved you for 3 years more than 3 years and I just ended it with a snap of the finger. I have been vile. I have said mean things and for that I am sorry. And if were not okay at this point, I totally understand. Because you didnt deserve that. Namanhid ka kasi naimmune ka sa dami ng away naten kaya wala nalang kaya natitiis mo nalang. Ang hirap tanggapin pero yun na yung nangyari. But I want you to know that I have loved you and that I am still loving you despite all of this. Despite the pain and the hurt and the chaos and the mess and the conflict. Im sorry If I have treated you like crap and for not giving you the respect you deserved. I am an awful partner and for that I am sorry. I really think that you deserved better. Not a crazy, toxic partner like me. And if Chenee is like that, and if you wanted to pursue her, I wouldnt blame you and its okay. This is me letting go of you and all of the hate and looking back at the memories and the moments that weve had. Everything that you have done for me and the people I love. For being my partner and my bestfriend. For being a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, for being my home. for being my world for almost 4 years. I feel bittersweet as I am writing this, because I am in pain and I really miss you. I really miss the old us. I miss the happy us. The crazy about each other us. Ngayon kasi we just drive each other crazy.  I really felt like we got tested kasi nga diba smooth seas dont make good sailors. If we didnt survive it then there is a reason. Baka I was in your life and you were in my life to be a lesson. Ang sakit isipin tho na yung 3 years and yung amount ng love all for a lesson. A hard lesson. That relationships are hardwork. Being a relationship is a decision and a choice you make, every single day. No matter how difficult. No matter how hard. No matter how tough. But I do hope that you know that I really loved you more than I loved anyone else and I really wish na maging happy ka. Wala akong pinagsisihan sa pinagsamahan naten. It was picture perfect specially nung nasa bubble tayo. We were a good team. I know we could have been really good parents. I know youre going to be a really great dad and a good husband and anyone you will love will be really happy and I am glad kasi even for a short while naranasan ko na mahalin ng ganun. Mahalin ng walang reservations. Mahalin ng extra mile. Salamat, baby ko. Salamat mahal ko. Salamat. Ang sakit sakit na sa sulat na to nagpapaalam ako sayo kasi feeling ko nasa cross roads tayo. Climax ba. Yung point na di alam yung kasunod. Pero isa lang ang alam ko mahal kita at sana sa panahong nakasama kita, hindi man sa latter part ng relasyon naten naparamdam ko kung gano kita kamahal at kung gano ka kahalaga sakin. Kung wala na talagang tayo at this point sana matupad mo lahat ng gusto mo. Too bad wala ako to celebrate today or to celebrate the next milestones of your life. You are a good person with a really really beautiful heart and I thank you for the love and know that you deserve the best things in life. Thank you for the years that you have shared with me and for loving me and giving your all to the point na wala ka nang mabigay. I am letting you go and I am hoping you would come back but I wouldnt impose. Kung bumalik ka man gusto ko na kusa at na gusto mo talaga hindi dahil sinabi ko or na nirequire ko. Gusto ko na bumalik ka kasi narealize mo na gaya ko hindi mo rin kaya na wala ako sa buhay mo at na gusto mong ayusin at gusto mo na tayo parin sa dulo.

If we are still together, know that these are my thoughts and my realizations while we are apart and you know what I wish I could turn back time so we can relive those days na di tayo okay o na nagtitiisan tayo. I am sorry for this phase. I really am.

Mahal na mahal kita. I love you Uri

[vicente-enriquez]

Di Na Muli

Two years later. It takes Ed two years – before he can finally see Greg again. Sequel to the Tubero AU.

 It was in 2018, at a bar gig. No, Ed corrected himself. The music boomed, he felt the hair on the back of his neck rise up. Every beat. Every supersonic little thing. He felt it – the ground beneath his feet. Or how he smelled cigarette smoke.

A baby-faced guy in a white shirt and ripped jeans was hogging the mic now.  From the corner of Ed’s eye, he saw someone take photos of the singer. The music blared louder – and the singer started rapping. The man was on overdrive.

“Your name?”

And so Ed turned. A face. A familiar one. He was still as handsome as ever. His eyes were dark; he wore a cap upside down, a black shirt and ripped jeans. In one hand, he held a DSLR up.

Damn. Yummy.

“Ed. Eh, yung sa ‘yo?” Ed scratched the back of his neck.

“Greg.”

Greg grinned.

They shook hands.

“Ano pakay mo rito, Ed?” Greg asked. His voice was husky. He coughed – a smoker’s cough. “So, isa ka bang millennial na mahilig sa indie scene?”

“Alam mo, itatanong ko rin sana sa iyo yung same thing, eh.”

Rusca laughed. A light one, at that.

“Just covering my best friend’s gig.”

“Ah…”

Ed shied away.

“So… songer siya, no?”

“Di na songer.” Greg laughed. “Singer na siya.”

Ed found himself blushing. Any more moment around this Greg, and he was going on overdrive. Deep inside, he wanted to curse himself. Why was he so marupok?

He hated it.

He was not like this. He would never be like this.  Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

“Mahilig ka rin ba sa OPM, Ed?” Greg asked.

Ed smiled.

“Ah, oo naman.”

Before long, the set ended.

“Greg!”

Ed craned his head – and the ripped jeans-clad singer moved next to Greg. His face, flushed. Eyes, flashing.

“Oy, Vince.”

Ed blushed. Awkward.

Greg raised a brow.

“Ed?”

“… ano yun?”

“I want your number.”

 *

“Binigla mo kasi yung kuya.”

Vince cackled.

The lights were a flurry of red and neon, from across the glass window of Ministop. Greg bit his lip, as Vince got his flavored water, clutching a hint of what seemed to be cigarettes. The two of them took seats.

“Anong masama kung gusto kong manglandi?”

“Nagoyo mo na ata si Kuya.”

Vince twisted the lid of the bottle. His fingers were long. Strong. Calloused, from his years of playing the guitar. Greg watched him, with glassy and heavy eyes. He had grown up, to seeing this kid grow up.

It hit him in the gut.

“Hookup culture things,” Greg pointed out.

“Hookup culture is liberal,” Vince countered. He took more gulps of water. Surely, he must be tired.

“Di ko alam nagiintellectually masturbate ka na pala.”

Vince shrugged. “Di po to intellectual masturbation. Just saying. Dapat kasi nakikinig ka ke Selya pag naguusap tayo, e. Never mind na ex mo siya, ah. Marami siyang sense.”

A phone buzzed to Moira’s You Are My Sunshine. Greg resisted snorting. Vince held up a hand, warily. “Girlfriend ko,” he mouthed.

He put the phone to his ear; Greg tried to look away.

“Mahal?” he asked. “Sige, sunduin kita in a few. Kasama ko kasi si Greg, e. Diyan muna ako matutulog mamayang gabi, diyan sa place mo. Ah, oo, maayos naman gig ko.” He paused. A few laughs in between. “Sige, bilhan kita ng sleeping mask mo.” His cheeks reddened. “Sige. Ingat ka.”

He put the phone down. Fixed his attention back to Greg.

“Hayst. Iba na ang in love,” Greg sighed.

Vince made finger guns. “So? Tulog ako mamaya sa bahay niya. Masaya na ako sa kanya.”

Greg sighed. For all his tendencies to be that friend who was always serious, it was weird to see this kid act goo-goo at the mention of his girlfriend.

“Eh paano pa ikaw!”

“Wag ako, Vicente.”

“E ikaw?” Vince laughed. He eyed a stand on the stall…. Greg followed his gaze. A colorful aisle of what seemed to be… condoms. His ears pinked.

“My wild nights era are over,” declared Greg. “Di na ako tubero, friend.”

“Eh paano yung kanina, ke Ed?”

“It’s a long story.”

“Ikwento mo na. Bata pa ang gabi, friend.”

Greg set his jaw.

“Fine. But don’t laugh at me.” He sighed.

*

Ed turned the volume up on the radio. Whitney Houston’s Where Do Broken Hearts Go blared from it. But truly, where did broken hearts really go?

Itanong na ke Mareng Whitney!

Kung ganun kadali lang, eh. Ed opened the fridge. Took out his ensaymada. Popped it in his mouth. It wasn’t enough to satiate him, just one ensaymada. For tonight, he needed more. Bitin kasi, e.

He cried.

Two years, he thought. Two years, no Greg. Just small memories of the stupid pipes, the stupid flyer, that stupid number.

It was just one encounter, but he couldn’t forget it.

It was Greg. He bit his lip. It definitely was Greg. He needed to see Greg soon. Tell him what he felt. Back then, when Tonyo had fallen for Isabel, they’d all laughed at him, for trying so many things that were so out of his character. But he was in love.

And damn, Ed wanted to take back all his laughter.

He hugged the pillow.

*

“If mahal mo siya, e di mahal mo siya. Ganun yun.” Vince shrugged. Back to his serious demeanor, back to his sensibilities.

He clutched his Watson’s bag, quite tightly. The two of them stood, among blaring watery lights. In the darkness, they heard the screeches of the vehicles.

“I know. I got his number naman, kasi, eh.”

“Good for you.”

Vince chuckled.

Greg felt something tug at his headspace. He had too many worries back then. Surely, now that everything was better, maybe…

His ears were hot.

“Do you think I should call him?”

“Bahala ka.” Vince checked his phone. “Take the first move. Ed needs an explanation. Pinaghintay mo na yung tao nang dalawang taon.”

Greg nodded.

A car paused. Nissan, Livina. The front door opened, and Vince slipped in. Greg inched – to see who was inside.

Yep, it was definitely his girlfriend. Petite, her hair pulled back in a ponytail.

The window screen zoomed down. Vince leaned forward.

“Ayaw mo sumabay samin?”

Greg shook his head.

“Kayong dalawa muna magbonding time. Uwi na siguro ako. Kelangan ko talagang kausapin si Ed e.”

His girlfriend raised a brow. There was a glint to her brown eyes. Oh shit – she looked familiar. One of his ex, Selya’s friends.

Nakakaloka.

“Ayaw mo po talaga?” she insisted.

“Di na talaga, but thanks.”

They drove off.

*

2AM.

Greg dialed in Ed’s number. Two, three rings.

A pick up.

“Hello?”

Ed sounded groggy.

“Hi, it’s me. I want to say I love –“

“Wag mong guluhin tulog ko, putangina mong pakshet ka!”

Greg pressed End Call. He looked down. It was so hard not to feel down, with the reaction. So Ed really rejected him?

He looked at the mirror in front of him.

Damn, no one really loved him, huh.

*

Ed looked at his phone.

Greg.

Shit. 2AM.

*

Ed called him, at 9AM.

“Hello? It’s me, Greg.” Greg was less chipper. He coughed his smoker’s rasp. “Si Ed to, di ba?”

“Oo, it’s me. I wanted to say… sorry kasi minura kita kanina. Ayoko kasing naiistorbo tulog ko e.” Ed sighed. “Pasensya talaga.”

“Really, oks lang. Sobrang… naiintindihan ko.” Greg giggled nervously.

“Wait!”

Ed threw one hand up.

“Ano?” Greg sounded like he got caught off-guard.

“Greg, I know it’s you. Yung tubero…”

“I can explain.”

“Okay?”

“Coffee, sa Sabado. Ministop Maginhawa. Mahabang kwentuhan to. If free ka, ah.”

“Ah, free ako.”

*

Greg looked human, when Ed saw him in Ministop. His hair, combed. A lot better than the Greg he met two years ago.

He sat beside Greg.

“I know we met… nang messed up ako, but I’m better,” Greg began. “Mas ayos na ako, swear.”

“Shh.”

Their eyes met.

“Ano?”

“Greg, I like you. Regardless.”

Greg gaped at him.

*

Greg woke up to the smell of ensaymada from the toaster downstairs. Back to Project 4, it was, he thought fondly. He put on his shirt, and climbed down the stairs.

True enough, Ed was heating some buttered bread slices on the toaster.

“Look,” Ed began. He laughed. “About last night…”

“Yeah, I know.” Greg reddened.

“Tayo na ba?” Ed’s eyes flashed. His cheeks were still flushed from last night.

“Tayo na.”

 END.

[jenqoe]

New story up on my Patreon!  (The cheapie $1 tier. If you go wild and back at the $2 tier you get bonus mermaids!)

https://www.patreon.com/jennybarber

So - Shadows of Kalan Gwav - where hungry things are trying to escape the space between worlds and a motley collection of islanders old and new must band together to save the day!

Starring Maddy Cain, a portal-hopping Ace fox-shifter trouble-magnet (who will be popping up in many Patreon stories to come!); with appearances from Benni Blackthorn, Ace nb raven-sorcerer escaping a family you don’t want to mess with; (just call me) Ajay. a genderfluid dragon exiled from another world; ancient Minura, a stone witch from pre-Roman times with all kinds of stories to tell; and Tess Fisher, newest stone witch to the island of St Senara, who might be just a wee bit out of her depth...

---extract---

There’s something wrong with the island.  A restlessness lurking just under its skin, wild and sly and dancing just out of reach every time I try to hunt it down, and it’s been getting stronger as season’s end approaches.

It’s in the stones, I think. Has to be.  Such a fragile place this island, such a very interesting place too. Full of ancient magic that’s been twisted and modified, rerouted over centuries, fed with blood and life and crafted tribute.  Shaped by will and chance, and all of it so delicately balanced that the wrong push at the wrong time could be disaster.  Or a glorious sight to behold, depending on your view.

But I’m a wild and sly thing too, no fox would ever dare be otherwise. No fox could survive if they didn’t run with a trick or two under their paws, even when they have to live in human shape. Even when they have to play civilised and help raise an ever-growing family of waifs and strays.

Whatever is brewing is a threat to the peace we’ve clawed back for ourselves after a succession of interesting times on the mainland, and that’s not something I’m willing to allow.

[phgq]

Palace spox says Lopezes continue to be ‘major player’

#PHnews: Palace spox says Lopezes continue to be ‘major player’

MANILA – Malacañang is standing by its pronouncement that President Rodrigo Duterte was not referring to the Lopez family, who owns ABS-CBN Corp. when he said he has dismantled the oligarchy in a recent speech in Sulu because the Lopezes continue to be a “major player” in the industry.

Presidential Spokesperson Harry Roque said even if the franchise of ABS-CBN was not renewed, the Lopezes are still active in other business ventures such as Rockwell Land Corp. and First Gen Corp. among others.

“The Lopezes have not been dismantled. They have other businesses. They have First Gen. They’re still a major player. They’re the only player as far as Lopez PR & Marketing Group is concerned. They are still active in real estate. They still have Rockwell. What they lost is ABS-CBN and it’s because they have no franchise,” he said in an interview over ABS-CBN News Channel’s Headstart.

Roque said the President should not be blamed for the network’s shutdown because there is also “documentary evidence” to show that it is a Congressional panel that denied to renew the franchise of ABS-CBN.

“We have to go by what the Constitution says. The Constitution says it is only Congress that can grant a franchise,” he said.

He said Duterte was only referring to oligarchs who he himself made public threats against such as tycoon Lucio Tan, Manuel V. Pangilinan, and the Ayalas who earned Duterte’s ire due to past issues.

“He’s not going to mince his words. When he challenged the water concessionaires, he said so publicly. Minura niya, sinabi niya ‘Pakukulong ko kayo (He cursed them, he said ‘I’ll make sure you end up in jail)’. He doesn’t have to hide under any cloak of anonymity when he wants to say something,” he said.

Duterte previously chastised Tan for his billion-peso tax liability but forgave him after he paid them and offered an additional plane to fly home repatriated overseas Filipino workers (OFWs) from Kuwait.

The President also threatened to file plunder charges against Pangilinan and the Ayalas over “onerous” water concession agreements, but also made amends after the two significantly contributed to the national government’s coronavirus disease (Covid-19) response.

“The difference is when he (Duterte) threatened to throw the Ayalas and MVP behind bars he did so because he can order a prosecution for failure to comply with the concession agreement,” he said.

He emphasized that the President never threatened the Lopezes with “jail time.”

Softened

Roque explained that Duterte’s outrage against Tan, Pangilinan, and the Ayalas only “softened” after they delivered at a “time of crisis.”

“As far as the oligarchs that he absolutely detested for cheating the people, the difference is they delivered at a time of crisis. Hindi ko naman maintindihan kasi (I don’t know) why ABS-CBN did not do that. I know you donated PHP2 billion of your own money but the rest you raised from your TV programs. But these two companies did it on their own,” he said.

Both Pangilinan and the Ayalas have donated billions worth of relief assistance, helped put up quarantine facilities, and provide medical supplies and equipment in the fight against Covid-19.

Roque said the President was “moved” by the apology of ABS-CBN president and chief executive officer Carlo Katigbak for the network’s failure to run his political ads during the 2016 presidential campaign.

“I do not know why ABS-CBN could not have done more like what the Ayalas and MVP did,” he said.

Edited speech

Meanwhile, he refused to comment on an Inquirer report showing that the President’s speech in Jolo, Sulu edited out a portion where he did mention ABS-CBN before he claimed to have dismantled the oligarchy.

In a 40-minute audio recording of the entire speech acquired by the Inquirer, the President was quoted saying: “’Yun namang ABS-CBN binaboy ako. Pero sinabi ko kapag ako nanalo, bubuwagin ko ang oligarchy ng Pilipinas. Ginawa ko. Without declaring martial law (ABS-CBN defiled me. But I said if I win, I will dismantle the oligarchy in the Philippines. I did it without declaring martial law).”

Roque said he was not present when the President delivered the speech and had no knowledge about parts of the speech being omitted.

“Unfortunately, I was not in Jolo…In so far as he has actually gone against the oligarchs referring to the water concessionaires and Lucio Tan I stand by that. I am not spinning. I am repeating what the President has said and he takes pride in he was able to somehow promote public interest,” he said.

On Tuesday, Roque said there is no policy to edit Duterte’s speech delivered in any of his scheduled activities before it can be aired on television.

No intention to make rich go poor

Insisting that the President did not have any cronies, Roque also clarified the portion of his speech where he addressed Sulu Gov. Sakur Tan saying he wanted his "friends" to "get rich."

Political observers warned that this statement "smacks of cronyism", but Roque disagreed.

"I think he's referring to the business community in general because many of them are his friends. And he's encouraging them to do more because if they get rich the country will benefit as well. I think that’s clear from the literal words. That it is not his intention to make the rich poor, he wants them to get even richer because there will be benefits," he said.

Duterte himself has denied he is cultivating his own set of cronies by replacing those currently in power. (PNA)

***

References:

* Philippine News Agency. "Palace spox says Lopezes continue to be ‘major player’." Philippine News Agency. https://www.pna.gov.ph/articles/1108999 (accessed July 15, 2020 at 08:01PM UTC+14).

* Philippine News Agency. "Palace spox says Lopezes continue to be ‘major player’." Archive Today. https://archive.ph/?run=1&url=https://www.pna.gov.ph/articles/1108999 (archived).

[heyifyouseekae]

Ito ang totoo: sumang-ayon ka man o hindi

Ngayong gabi, ilalathala ko ang katotohanan, sumang-ayon ka man o hindi, alam mo at Niyang ito ang nangyari. (ITATAYA KO ANG SAMPUNG UTOS PARA DITO.)

Isang event na dinaluhan mo, “Miting de Abanse” kung tawagin mo, ikaw ang nag aasikaso sa sounds. Magka-chat tayo. Nabanggit mo na may mga kumukuha ng number mo, at ibinigay mo sa isa ang number ko. Sa emcee ng partido. Bading sabi mo. Dinagdagan mo, itinalikod mo ang telepono mo kung saan naroon ang larawan nating dalawa upang malaman nilang merong tayo.

Matapos ang gabing iyon, nag sunod-sunod ang panaginip ko tungkol sa iyo at sa ibang tao. Babae ang kasama mo. Nahuli raw kitang may kausap at nagalit ako. Paulit-ulit ang panaginip na ito. Hanggang sa isang madaling araw nagising ako, halos alas tres na ng umaga sa orasan ko. Nag-message ako sa'yo:

“Nagising ako dahil napanaginipan na naman kita. It’s about you & somebody else. May kasama kang iba. I’m not accusing you of anything, but if there’s something going on please tell me kasi hindi ako pinapatulog ng thoughts at instict ko.”

Pag gising ko, ng alas sais ng umaga, nakita ko. Nag-reply ka pala nung 3:31am. Sabi mo nagising ka lang din ng hindi mo alam, at gusto mong magkita tayo pagtapos ko sa trabaho. Isinantabi ko ang tanong na “Bakit kaya nagising ka din ng ganong oras? Nagising ka ba o gising ka pa talaga kaya nabasa mo?” Pero hinayaan ko na. Dahil baka nga paranoid na talaga ako.

Nagkita tayo, pagtapos ko sa trabaho. Tinanong mo ko “Ano bang napanaginipan mo?”, sumagot ako. Ikunwento ko ang masakit na panaginip ko. Hanggang sa sumagot ka, “Yan kasi iniisip mo bago ka matulog kaya napapanaginipan mo.” Tumingin ako sa mga mata mo habang hawak ko ang mga kamay mo. Tinanong kita ulit, sumagot ka “Wala nga akong nakakausap na iba. Maniwala ka naman.” At naniwala ako. Tinignan kita sa mga mata mo at naniwala ako. Baka nga ako ang problema. Baka nga mali ako.

Isang hapon, pagkagaling ko sa trabaho, sinundo mo ako sa Unioil dahil magkikita tayo. Nung malapit na tayo sa inyo, sabi mo nasa Sta. Rita ang partidong pinag-DJhan mo nung Miting De Abanse. Sinabi ko:

K: Tara silip tayo. Gusto kong makita ung bading na kumuha ng number mo. N: Wag na. Anong gagawin natin jan? K: Gusto ko lang makita. N: Ano ba? Hindi nga ako nagpapakita jan e… K: Edi ako na lang. Wag ka na sumama. N: (pagalit) Ano dito lang ako? Wag na nga! K: (nainis na rin) Edi wag na! N: (pagalit) Bakit nagagalit ka? Tara na. Tangina. Mapilit ka e. K: Wag na! Tara na. Nagagalit ka kagad e. Titingin lang naman. N: Tsss! Kahit ikaw yung nagagalit?!!!

At hindi na ako kumibo. Bakit nga ba hindi tayo makasilip doon? Bakla naman pala yung kumuha ng number mo. Wala namang problema, pero bakit nagalit ka? Meron bang hindi dapat makakita sa atin na magkasama? Iyan ang tumatakbo sa utak ko pero hinayaan ko na dahil baka nga mali na naman ako. Dahil para sa'yo, mali talaga ako.

Miyerkules. May 9. Sinundo mo ulit ako sa Unioil at nagtungo tayo sa bahay nyo. Naligo ka at naiwan mo ang telepono mo sa akin. Kinuha ko at binuksan ko. Normal na gawain natin. Tumingin ako ng files, at napadpad ako sa videos. Unang beses kong mapuntahan yun dahil sa messenger lang naman ako tumitingin. Hanggang sa nakita ko ang mga porn videos. Nasa unahan ang isang babae na nasa kwarto at mag-isa itong pinapasaya ang kanyang pagkababae. Inantay kita makababa at tinanong kita kung bakit may ganon ka, sumagot ka “Wala. Bakit? Ano bang masama?” Sabi ko, “Bakit nga meron ka nyan? Sino ba yan?” Naiinis na ko. Bakit ba ko nainis non? Normal ang porn lalo na sa lalaki. Alam ko yon. Pero mas madaling tanggapin na babae’t lalaki ang nandoon kaysa sa mag-isang babaeng pinaglalaruan ang sarili nya. Bilang babae at nobya, nakakainis isipin na bakit kailangan ganon? Sa utak ko, na-aarouse ka pa sa ibang babae. Bakit? Bakit ganon? Hindi pa ba ako sapat? Paranoid na ko masyado pero babae yon. Hindi naman sya porn star. Babaeng nasa kwarto. Iniisip ko pa lang ang ginagawa mo habang pinapanood mo yon, nakakainis na. Parang kulang pa ba ko? 

Pero hindi ako nag tataas ng boses. Alam mo yan. Hindi pa ako nag taas ng boses ng pangalawang beses akong nagtanong. Hanggang sa inagaw mo sakin ang telepono mo at nag taas ka ng boses, “AKIN NA NGA YAN! CELLPHONE KO TO E. ANO BANG PROBLEMA MO HA? ANO BANG KINAKAGALIT MO? TANGINA. ANONG PROBLEMA MO?” habang sinisiko mo ako ng malakas. Hindi ako nag sasalita at patuloy ang paniniko mo habang paulit-ulit ang tanong mo. Hanggang sa mapikon na rin ako dahil nasasaktan na ako. Hinampas-hampas kita sa braso. Sinabihan kita “MASAKIT! ANO BA? PINOPROVOKE MO BA KO MAGALIT? HA?” Sumagot ka patuloy ang paniniko mo “OH ANO? NGAYONG SINASABAYAN KO YANG GALIT MO ANO? KAGABI KA PA. NAGTITIMPI LANG AKO SAYO. ANO? SUMAGOT KA. ANO?” At hinampas kita ulit dahil tangina nasasaktan na talaga ako. 

Sinabi ko pang tingnan mo namumula na ung braso ko bagaman hindi naman talagang namula, naramadaman kong masakit na. Masakit na talaga kaya gumanti na rin ako. Sinabi kong kung gaganyanin mo lang pala ko dito sana pinauwi mo na lang ako. At ibinato mo sakin ang bag ko. “PUTANGINA UMUWI KA NA. UMUWI KA NA. UMUWI KA NA!!” At ibinato ko din sayo ang bag ko. At doon mo na ko sinimulang itulak ng itulak habang “PUTANGINAMO! UMUWI KA NA! PUTANGINAMO! PUTANGINAMO!” hanggang sa nasampal kita. “Bastos ka! Wag mo kong mumurahin,putanginamo!” At tinutulak tulak mo ko habang sinasabi mong wag kitang ganyanin sa bahay nyo? At muli hanggang makaabot tayo sa pinto umuulan ng “PUTANGINAMO!” at ang huling ganti ko ay isang PUTANGINAMORIN at ibinagsak mo na ang pintuan sa likod ko.

Grabe ang gabing yan. Hindi ko alam kung paanong umabot sa ganyan ang galit mo dahil sa PORN. At hindi ko malaman kung bakit HINDI MO KAYANG AMININ SA SARILI MO NA IKAW ANG NAUNANG NANAKIT KAHIT NA INAMIN MO SA KAIBIGAN KO NA PRINOVOKE MO NGA AKO. Bakit mo ginawa yon? Nakakatawa na lang din na ikaw pa ang sugatan? Hindi ba’t kaya ka nasugatan dahil nanakit ka at hindi naman ako tanga na hahahayaan ka lang na saktan ako at hindi ako gaganti? Na ako ang may kasalanan? Na mahilig akong manakit? Nakakagagong isipin na iyan ang itinatatak mo sa utak mo. Nang hindi iniisip na kaya ka sinaktan dahil ikaw ang nauna at gumanti lang ako.

Hindi mo kayang aminin sa sarili mo na pananakit ang ginagawa mo kapag hinahawakan mo ko ng mahigpit at pipiglas ako at muling mas hihigpit ang hawak mo. Hindi mo naisip na bukod sa gusto kong umalis, ay nasasaktan ako sa hawak mo kaya ako pumipiglas?

Hindi mo kayang aminin sa sarili mo na nung gabing napuno ng kalmot ang dibdib mo ay dahil hinawakan mo ko sa leeg at hindi mo kayang amining masakit ang pagkakahawak mo kaya nagsabi akong wag mo kong sakalin at nagagalit na tayo sa isa’t isa. Hindi mo kayang aminin sa sarili mo na ikaw nama ang nag umpisa at ang mga aksyon ko ay sagot lamang sa mga ginagawa mo?

Mabalik tayo doon sa gabi na pinagmumumura mo ako dahil sa porn, bakit kailangang umabot sa ganon? Bakit kailangan mo kong iprovoke? Para patunayang mali ako o para makawala ka sakin at magawa mo ang gusto mo? (Para sa’yo, paranoid na naman ako sa puntong ito. Tangina.)

Noong una, sinisisi ko ang sarili ko sa nangyari. Baka nga mali ako. At sana nga naging mali na lang ako. Para hindi ko nalaman yung totoo. Sana hindi ko na lang nakita yung porn para hindi ka nagtagumpay sa plano mo. Ganon siguro kaimportante para sayo itong bago. At itatanim mo sa isip mo at sa mga nakakausap mo na ako ang may kasalanan kaya pala matapos ang ilang oras nakalike ka na sa posts nya. At finollow mo na sya sa instagram habang blinock mo ako messenger. Sana nga mali na lang ako. Para hindi ako nasaktan. Para hindi ko nalaman ang katotohanang nabasa ko sa messenger mo nung natutulog ka at hindi mo namalayang katabi mo ako hanggang sa makaalis ako. Nabasa ko. Hindi ka pwedeng magkaila don.

Kahit sinong tao, kahit ikaw. Kung sa ibang persona mangyayari ito, hindi ka maniniwalang magagawa yun ng isang tao dahil lang sa porn. Hindi mo sasabihin sa taong ayaw mo syang makita at makausap dahil lang sa nag-away kayo dahil sa porn. Sa akin nga, nawala si Laya, pinili ko pang yakapin ka kaysa sisihin ka dahil isa ka sa mga dahilan kung bakit nawala sya. Pero iyan? Dahil sa porn? Dahil napuno ka sa pagiging paranoid ko? O dahil meron naman talagang iba at naguluhan ka kung sino ang mas gusto mo kaya hindi mo nagawang sabihin saking hiwalay na tayo?

Sana nga nagkamali na lang ako. Para sana nung nagmakaawa ako sayong kausapin mo ko, sumagi sa isip mong ako ang mahal mo at higit yon kaysa sa galit at gulo na nararamdaman mo. Sana nga nagkamali na lang ako. Sana hindi na lang sya pumasok sa kwento, baka sana hindi ka naguluhan. Baka sana hindi mo ko prinovoke para magalit habang sinisiko mo ako. Baka sana hindi mo ko minura dahil mahal mo ko. Pero sana na lang lahat ito.

Hayaan mo, mahal. Hanggang dito na lang itong katotohanang ito. Wala namang nagbabasa ng mga sulat ko dito. Wala naman ding punto kung ipaglalaban ko pa ito dahil NATALO NA AKO.

Ipaglaban ko man ang totoo, hindi pa rin ako ang pipiliin mo. Hahayaan ko na ang mga ito dahil patuloy naman ang pangtanggi mo. Pinaniwalaan mo na din naman ang gusto mo, at pinaniwala mo na din naman ang mundo na ako ang mali at masamang tao rito. Para saan pang ikwento ko ang totoo e kung sa dulo iba na ang pinili mo. Talo na ako, kahit kailan hindi ako mananalo sa kahit na ano at sino sa buhay mo, dahil wala naman para sa'yo kahit sino pang mawala sa buhay mo. Kahit ako. Maaring minahal mo ako, pero hindi ako ganoon kahalaga para piliin mo. Kaya hanggang dito na lang ito.