#mind I’m running on 7 hours of sleep total over the past two nights

[cahootings]

do I take a 4pm nap or is that the devil speaking

[libraryofloveletters]

buck x fem reader work together / secretly dating but they act like they hate each other and the team doesn’t know. reader is also bobby’s daughter (or niece up to you) and scared of his reaction (prompts 17, 37, 42, 81)

Unconventional

Evan Buckley x Reader 

Prompts: #17: “We shouldn’t be doing this”, #37: “Uh why is your shirt inside out?”, #42: “I love you”, #81: “I can explain” 

Warnings: fem!reader, worrying, vulgar/suggestive comments (kinda but not really ?), suggested sexual content, a few swear words, kissing, mentions of hospitals, surgery and injuries. 

Category: fluff with a lil angst 

Word Count: 4.4k

Author's Note: I wrote it as bobby’s niece, it just made more sense :) hope you liked it!! 

---- 

Evan Buckley was a pain in your ass. 

He had been since the day you met him. His annoyingly attractive face, his stupid pretty blue eyes and his smile, not to mention how sweet he was. You couldn't help but hate him. Not in the typical “I hate your guts and hope you fall down a flight of stairs” way but in the “god you’re gorgeous and I want to marry you” way. 

Did you plan on liking the ridiculously attractive firefighter ? Most definitely not. 

Were you also planning on dating him in secret ? Also a no. 

Hence why you were sitting in his jeep on a Saturday at 3 in the morning. The two of you had gone on a date to this little restaurant outside of the city but everything that could go wrong kind of did go wrong.

Buck’s shift was supposed to end at 6 but they got a call last minute so he didn’t get home until 7:30. You called to push the reservation back and when he did pick you up, you got stuck in traffic. By the time the two of you got to the restaurant, it was 8:30 and the woman said she called to see if the two of you still needed the reservation but there was no answer (she didn’t call but neither of you were in the mood to argue) - Now it's 9 pm and the two of you still haven't had dinner. Venturing down the block, there was nowhere that seemed appealing. The night really began at some random mom and pop dinner you spotted by the beach. Deciding to have your own little dinner date on the beach, it was now 9:30. Buck had a blanket in the trunk (you didn’t ask why nor did you really wanna know) and you sat on the beach and had dinner. Time flew by, it was around 1 when the two of you began wondering what time it was. 

The date was now prolonged by Buck’s craving for something sweet so once again, the two of you were on a hunt but for somewhere to go. He googled the closest ice cream parlour but most places were closed, he searched until he finally found a place that was 20 minutes away. It was totally worth the drive considering it was some of the best ice cream you've had in your life. Which now brought you to 2:20 in the morning, the two of you were still sitting on the hood on his jeep, a container of half eaten ice cream between you. 

Buck looked over at you, a smile on his face. ��Did you have fun ? despite, you know, all the shit that went wrong ?” you chuckled, “I did.” Buck had a shift at 11 so it was time for the night to come to an end. One of his hands held yours and the other on the wheel, you were staring out the window as the breeze blew by. 

“Something on your mind babe?” Buck asked you, glancing over at you as you turned towards him. 

“We shouldn’t be doing this” you mumbled, you didn’t want to end things with him but that didn’t mean that you didn’t have doubts about where this relationship was going. “What do you mean ?” he asks, his eyes on the road. “I mean how long are we going to hide this from everyone ?” your eyes back out the window, Buck sighed and the conversation dropped. There were a few minutes of silence and the tension filled the car, Buck finally spoke up “you were the one that didn’t want to say anything.” his voice came off a bit harsher than you expected, letting go of his hand, your body shifted towards the door and way from him. He noticed your change in emotion and seating. 

“Babe, I'm sorry. It's just that you didn’t want to say anything and it’s entirely your choice. I get it but we can figure it out. One step at a time, okay ?” Buck looks over at you when he pulls into the parking lot. “Yeah, I know. It’s fine.” leaning over the console to press a kiss to his cheek.  “Good night Buck, thank you for tonight” you give him a smile and get out of the jeep. Buck follows you, “let me walk you up,” he grabs your wrist, the two of you stopped in the middle of the parking lot. “That’s fine, I'll text you so you know I’m okay. You need to get home anyways, you have a shift and you need your sleep” shaking your head, you pull your hand away from him and head inside before he can ask again. 

He was right, it was your choice not to say anything but you weren't sure how your uncle would react. This relationship wouldn't just affect your relationship with him but also his relationship with Buck. You didn’t- couldn't let Buck jeopardize his work life for his love life. 

Shutting the door once you get into your apartment, you send a text to your boyfriend. 

To Lover Boy Buck: I’m home, text me when you get home. Sleep well <3

From Lover Boy Buck: Just pulled in, goodnight babe 

----

Athena’s birthday was on Saturday and Bobby had planned a surprise party for her. With a little help from May, things were in place. 

Bobby had taken Athena out for lunch at some fancy cafe that was impossible to get into and then to see a play. While they were out, you headed over to their place to help May set up. Upon arriving, you saw that Hen was already there as was Buck. 

“Good afternoon my loves!” you shout as you walk over to the kitchen. “I come with coffee” you hand a cup to May and the other to Hen, the two are thankful for the coffee as you had a shit ton of decorating to do and only a few hours to get it done. Buck leant against the wall by the kitchen entryway, “where's mine?” he asked which made you roll your eyes. “Didn’t know that you were gonna be here, no one invited you anyways.” you reply, sorting through the packages of balloons on the table, you toss one and it hits him square in the face. 

“Ow!” he shouts, rubbing his cheek. 

“Oh did I hurt you ?” you ask, pouting at him mockingly. 

Considering the weird note that the two of you left on during your last date, plus not being able to see each other that week left things in a bit of a mess. 

May and Hen exchange glances, “Buck, how about you help put up the banner in the backyard ?” she practically dragged Buck by the arm and into the yard. May was in the kitchen icing some cupcakes that she and Harry had made the night before when she called for you. 

“Why don't you get along with Buck ? I don't know him all the well but he seems like a good guy” May pleads his case unintentionally. 

He is a good guy 

“Ever meet someone and you just don’t like them ?” you ask, she hums. “That’s me with Buck” is what came out instead. 

“I get it.” she nodded, she began telling you about a guy in her chemistry class that just got on her nerves all the time. You excused yourself when the doorbell rang. Chim and Maddie had arrived right as Karen pulled into the driveway with Denny and Nia. You let everyone in and they began helping too. About an hour later, Eddie arrives with Chris and the cake. You take the cake from him so he can help Chris with his jacket.  

“Buck!” you shout

“Yeah ba- yeah ?” he corrects himself last second. Your eyes widen at the word that almost slipped out of his mouth. No one seem to catch it except for Chim who gave you a weird look but you just brush it off. 

“Take this, I need to change.” you hand the cake off to him and head to the bathroom to change into your dress. A few moments later, there was a knock on the bathroom door and then it opened. 

“Hey! I'm chang- oh it’s just you” you mumble as he shuts the door. Buck’s back pressed up against the door. “Are you just gonna watch me or are you going to help me?” you turn, your back towards him now. Pulling your hair over your shoulder, you feel one of Buck’s hands on your waist and then the tug of the zipper.  

“Must you always fight with me, y/n ?” he presses a kiss to your shoulder, his arms wrapping around your waist. “Must you always get on my nerves, Evan ?” you were looking back at him in the mirror, he flashed you a smile and nodded, a rather amused look on his face. “Yeah, it's kind of my job to irritate you” his arms loosen as you turn around to face him now, leaning back against the counter. “Well I guess then I have to fight with you” running your hand through his hair, he leans into you, his forehead against yours. 

“You know, they say make love, not war” he whispers, his lips almost touching yours. A little chuckle slips past your lips, “is this your way of saying that we should stop fighting ?” you mumble as you press a kiss to his lips. Buck pulls you closer to him - which you didn’t even think was possible, “no, it’s my way of saying we should make love” he smiles against your lips as he lifts you up onto the counter and you let out an obnoxiously loud laugh. “Oops” a hand comes up to cover your mouth. Buck can't help but smile, you were adorable and all he wanted was to go out there and tell everyone that he’s in love with you, something he hadn't even told you yet, but at last, he could not. 

“You’re cheesy, you know that right ?” looking up at him whilst you fiddled with the hem of his shirt. “If you want to fuck me, just say so” he tells you to which you reply “you're so vulgar Evan” while rolling your eyes. 

“Oh I'll show you vulgar” he chuckles and pulls off his shirt, his hand reaching behind you to unzip your dress. 

--

Buck left the bathroom first, the house had filled up within the 20 minutes the two of you were in the bathroom. He ran his hand through his hair in hopes to fix it from the tugging that just happened. As he stepped out into the backyard, his sister’s voice called out to him.

“Buck!” she walked over, “you’ve been so busy I haven't gotten a chance to say hi yet” she pulls her brother into a hug. Maddie’s face screws into a confused look. “Did you try a new body wash or something ?” she looks up at Buck, his brows furrow but he shakes his head. “Why?” he asks, “you smell like mint” she informs him. 

You step out into the backyard, a tube of mint chapstick between your fingers,  being applied to your lips. Buck’s eyes were on you, watching as the tube rubbed across your lips, his mind back to those lips were moments ago. Chimney’s voice caused him to pull his eyes away from you and onto him. 

“Uh why is your shirt inside out?” Chim asks him, brows raised. Buck looks down and his shirt is on inside out, “uh, I- uh I had to change.” he says, hoping they’d believe him. 

“You had that shirt on when we got here.” Chim had a puzzled look on his face. 

“Oh Christopher is calling for me, excuse me” Buck walks off before they could say anything. He did indeed make his way over to Eddie and Chris, you were on the other side of the backyard when your phone chimed. 

From Lover Boy Buck: Couldn't you have told me my shirt was on inside out?

To Lover Boy Buck: And how was I supposed to know that ? I didn’t have time to look at you

From Lover Boy Buck: Oh really ? You had plenty of time a few minutes ago 

To Lover Boy Buck: Behave. 

From Lover Boy Buck: Make me. 

You roll your eyes at his comment, May coming out and shouting that they just pulled in. Everyone stood by the backdoors, waiting for Athena and Bobby to come in. 

Athena had a blindfold on as Bobby led her down the stairs to the backyard. “I swear if you did somethin-” he undoes the blindfold mid sentence. 

“Surprise!!” everyone shouts, Athena had a huge smile on her face. She turns to Bobby, “you did all this ?” he smiles but shakes his head, “I had some help” nodding towards May, Athena walked over to her daughter to give her a hug. Bobby and Athena went around to say hello to everyone, Bobby coming over to you and Eddie, Buck and Chris were sitting beside each other. “Hey” Bobby smiled at the two of you, “hey” you smiled back before you gave him a hug. 

“What do I own you for today ?” he asks you

“Nothing at all, I'm glad I could help.” 

“Are you sure kid ?” 

“Yeah, I'm good. I’ll let you know if I need something uncle Bobby” 

He smiles and goes off to talk to Chim and Maddie. Eddie switches places with Buck, Christopher showing his father the trick that Buck just showed him. “You’re good with kids” you tell him, “yeah, I know” he replies. “You're also an arrogant asshole but perspective I suppose.” Buck chuckled at your comment, watching as you walked away. 

It was a while before you sat down for dinner, you were in the house with Bobby, helping him bring stuff out while everyone got seated. When you returned, there were two seats left. One at the head of the table, which was where your uncle was currently headed, leaving you no choice but to sit beside Buck. “Pass me the green bowl ?” he asks you, “no thanks” you reply nonchalantly. Bobby gives you a look, “y/n, pass him the bowl” you sighed and handed the bowl to Buck who was snickering. It took all of you not to smack this man in front of everyone. 

A hand on your upper thigh startled you, you coughed and Eddie looked at you from across the table, his brows furrowed. Your hand comes down to rest on top of Buck’s. Chris followed his father’s look over to you, “are you okay y/n?” he asked you sweetly, you smiled at him. “I’m okay buddy, thank you for asking” Buck bit the inside of his cheek, holding back a smile. Oh how he wanted to kiss you right now, but again, he couldn't really do that, could he? He settled for holding your hand under the table like teenagers for now. 

----

8 o'clock and you were supposed to be there 20 minutes ago. Bobby was probably there wondering where you were. You were supposed to be having dinner with your uncle tonight to tell him about you and Buck. Buck offered to tell him but you felt like it was only right for you to tell him. 

You dialled the number but it rang out. You assumed he was still driving or maybe he was ruining late too. The phone rang while you searched for something to wear. It was Bobby. 

“Hey!” you answer, “I'm gonna be a little late” 

“Y/n, we’re gonna have to take a rain check on dinner.” Something was wrong, you could tell from the way he answered. 

“Everything okay ? Are you still at work ?” 

“I’m at the hospital.” 

“What? Why? Are you okay ? Is it Athena ?” 

“Athena and I are fine. It’s Buck, he’s in surgery right now. I don't think I'll be leaving anything soon. I’m sorry about dinner.” 

Your heart dropped when he said it was Buck. 

“Did anyone tell Maddie ? Do you want me to pick her up ?” 

“It's alright, Chim went and got her. You don't have to come, we’re ok-” 

“I’ll be there in 10 minutes” 

Grabbing the keys, you’ve never run down the stairs so fast in your life. The whole drive over, it felt like the world was moving in slow motion. He’d still be in surgery when you arrived but you needed to know what happened. 

I love you Evan Buckley. 

The 5 words replaying in your head over and over again. The 5 words you hadn’t gotten the chance to say to him. The team plus Maddie and Athena were in the waiting room. Bobby came over and gave you a hug, “is he okay ? Did you guys hear anything ?” you ask as you sit beside Maddie. “Not yet” Bobby returns to his seat. 

“Mads, I'm sorry” you gave her a hug, she gave you a small smile. “It’s okay. Buck’ll pull through. He always does.” 

-- 

3 hours later and still nothing, he had been in surgery 2 hours prior to you arriving, bringing it to a total of 5 hours. Athena and Bobby left for a few minutes to see if they could get an update on him. You looked around the room, Eddie was leant against the wall, his legs on the chairs in front of him, Hen stood by the window on the phone with who you assumed was Karen. Chim’s arm was wrapped around Maddie, her head resting on his shoulder. 

Bobby and Athena returned telling everyone that there was no update other than he was still in surgery. Your leg bounced as you waited, Bobby rested a hand on your knee when he sat back down. 

“You okay kid ?” 

“Mhm hm why ?”

“You only bounce your leg when you’re nervous. You’re sure you’re okay ?” 

“Yeah, I'm gonna go get some coffee” you announce as you get up. If you spent another minute in that room, you were going to combust, you couldn't take it. “Does anyone want anything ?” there were a few mumbles of no but Eddie gets up and says he’ll come with you. The two of you walk down the hallway to the other end. Slipping a bill into the machine, it buzzes and then nothing. Eddie watches as you push the button a few times. Frustrated and tired, your hand smacks against the machine. A few nurses glare in your direction. 

“Hey, go get some air okay ? I’ll get the coffee and meet you outside” Eddie’s hand on your back, leading you to the doors.

“Eddie, I'm fine” 

“Y/n, go. You’ve been in here for a while and honestly, I could use the air too.” 

Not in the mood to protest, you step outside. It was a little past 11 now, it was dark and cold out. Your back pressed up against the brick wall, the coldness seeping through your shirt. A hand running over your face in an attempt to wake you up, you sigh as the door opens. 

“Here” Eddie handed you a mug that didn’t look like it came from a machine. The mug read “#1 nurse” on it and his says “world’s best mom” your brows furrow, looking at the man standing beside you. “I sweet talked one of the nurses, it's fine. I promised to return the mugs when we're done.” he says casually, making you smile. You had always enjoyed Eddie’s company, he didn’t ask questions or poke around in your life, he just lived in the moment. 

“Cute shirt” he chuckles, looking down at the blue t-shirt you had on. You hadn't realized that you left wearing it. “Oh thanks” you mumble, taking a sip of coffee. “It’s Buck’s, isn't it?” he asks, you almost choked on the coffee. 

“Wha- why would you ask me that ?” 

“It reeks of his cologne,” Eddie chucked. “I’ve known for months, y/n. The two of you aren't as slick as you think.” 

“Who else knows ?” 

“No one that I know of, Chim has an idea but he hasn't said anything” 

You hummed, looking out at the parking lot in front of you. “Does Bobby know ?” Eddie’s eyes practically burn into your side.

“I was going to tell him tonight.” 

Eddie’s phone buzzed before he could say anything else. “Let’s go in, the doctors are out.” Eddie followed you into the building and back into the waiting room. The doctor has just stepped in, she glanced back at you and Eddie, “Are you here for Buckley as well ?” 

“Yeah, how is he?” Eddie asks, the two of you step further into the room. “He’s stable as of now, we managed to stop the bleeding. He’s asleep but he’s got a long road ahead of him.” the doctor inform everyone, you watch as Maddie lets out a sigh, her hand squeezing Chim’s. “I can take someone in, if they’d like to go in” Chim let go of Maddie’s hand as she went to follow the doctor down the hall. Eddie could sense the change in body language, you were relaxed until Maddie stepped out with the doctor. His hand rests on your back again, “let’s sit down. You can go in after” he whispered to you. To anyone else in the room, it would look like something was happening between you and Eddie but he was just comforting you. There was nothing happening. 

The person you were in love with was laying in a hospital bed at the other end of the hallway. 

One by one, everyone went in to see him. Chim went in first, meeting Maddie in his room. When they return, they let everyone know he’s awake. Bobby and Athena are next, they go in for a few minutes. Hen was after them, you could hear them laughing from the other end of the hallway. 

It was so good to hear him laugh. 

You and Eddie went in last. Eddie sat beside his bed on the chair, he and Buck having a conversation. Eddie looked over at you, you were standing by the door. “I think I'll go call Chris and let him know you’re alright” Eddie pats Buck’s shoulder before stepping out the room. 

Buck’s attention was now on you. “hey you” he mumbles, trying to shift into a sitting position. “Don’t move, you’ll rip your stitches.” you take a seat where Eddie was a few moments ago. Buck’s hand reaches for yours, although he was awake, his hand felt cold. Your hand rubbed against his, his eyes on you. Neither of you say anything to the other. 

“I thought I lost you for a minute there.” 

“You’ll never lose me, y/n” Buck’s hand squeezes yours. 

“But I almost did and I hated every minute of it.” the tears welling up by your eyes, you blink a few times to get rid of them but instead a few slip down. Buck reaches up to wipe your tears, his hand cupping your cheek. 

“All of this for me ?” he teases, “there was no need to worry, you know that, right?” 

“You scared me you ass, don't do that” you sniffle, your hand wrapping around his wrist. 

“Y/n, I need to tell you something” his eyes were on yours, now you were worried again. “Okay, what is-” 

“I love you” he blurts out. 

“Oh Buck” you breathe, the soft expression on his face changes to a worried one. “Oh god, I'm sor-” your hand comes up and covers his mouth. 

“I love you too” you smile at him, you can feel him smile against your hand. Moving your hand to his cheek, “you do ?” he asks, you nod. “How can I not ?” Leaning out of the chair, your lips meet his. Your hand is still cupping his face and his hand lifting off the bed to meet your waist. Shifting from the chair to the bed, you sat beside Buck, your lips still on his. 

“Excuse me?” someone clears their throat, Buck pulls away to look at who's by the door. Bobby stood in the doorway, his arms folded in front of him and a rather amused Athena beside him. Buck’s eyes widen, you look over your shoulder to see your uncle standing there. 

“I can explain. Bobby I-” Buck starts, but Bobby cuts him off. “It’s okay Buck, I know.” he steps into the room. 

“You do?” the two of you say at the same time, both of you looking at him. Bobby nods, “I might be old - well older than you two but I’m not dumb” he chuckles, “if anything, you two are the dumb ones for thinking I wouldn't know.” he says 

“I was going to tell you at dinner” 

“I figured as much, I also figured you’d want to be here when Buck woke up” 

“Thank you for calling” you smile at him, he gives you a nod. “Everyone is heading home, are you going to stay with him ?” 

You hum, your attention back on Buck. You could hear Athena and Bobby whispering in the back and then the door shuts. Buck shifts slightly on the bed, making space for you. Laying on your side, beside him, your finger traces over the words tattooed on his forearm. The world had come to a pause finally, the things around you didn’t matter right now. Everything you cared about was beside you, the hospital wasn't the ideal place but all you cared about that he was okay. 

“Tell me again” you whisper, your head on his shoulder. Buck turns his head to look at you. 

“I love you y/n l/n” 

“I love you Evan Buckley” 

Turns out you did get to say those 5 words after all. 

--- 

Taglist: @reiidsbby @ssa-volturi @advicefromnixxxx @dralexreid @keenmarvellover @venusrosepetal @mikaelson-emma @beth-winchester21 @averyhotchner

[supernovafics]

𝐀 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑

pairing: andy barber x fem!reader

summary: in which the night was supposed to be special. however, it seems as if something is always going wrong. on this specific night, you and andy have convinced yourselves that everything will finally go according to plan, but it isn’t long until things go awry. you’re not ready to call it quits on it just yet, though.

warnings: defending jacob au (no mentions of laurie or jacob), fluff, slight angst, explicit language

word count: 2.3k words 

author’s note: first andy imagine! hope you guys enjoy<333

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“Whatever excuse you’re about to say, save it,” You said when you answered Andy’s call, and it connected to your car’s Bluetooth. “We are going to this restaurant, Barber. We’ve rescheduled so many times that I’m pretty sure at least two of the hostesses know my number by heart at this point.”

Your statement was a thousand percent true, and you were actually surprised that the restaurant hadn’t blocked your number and banned both you and Andy from coming yet because of how much you had called to reschedule. The last time was only three days ago when you and Andy were completely exhausted from the days you had at work and couldn’t bear to do anything more than deliver a pizza to your home and eat it in bed. The number of crumbs that you noticed in the bed in the morning was horrible, but overall it was worth it.

This night was different, though, at least it was supposed to be. That morning before you headed to the environmental law firm you worked at and Andy went to the DA’s office, you said that you would be done earlier than usual because you would only be doing the beginning preparations for a new case you had. Andy told you that he would be done at his office by seven, giving you both enough time to get to your eight o’clock reservation at the restaurant.

When you left your office not even fifteen minutes ago and hadn’t received any calls from Andy, you actually believed that things were finally going to go exactly how you both planned it. But, of course, you could only get but so lucky.

“I’m really sorry, honey,” Andy told you, and you could hear how sincere those words were. “This Jefferson case has been kicking my ass these past couple of days, and I can just tell I’m finally close to a breakthrough with it.”

You didn’t want to smile; you were supposed to feel at least a little bit mad that this dinner was once again on its way to getting canceled. But, you couldn’t muster up even a hint of a frown; instead, you genuinely felt happy for Andy. You didn’t know much about the case, but you did know how much of a pain it had been for him thus far, so you knew that you couldn’t make him stop working on it right then when things were finally about to turn around. Especially because you knew that if the tables were turned, he wouldn’t make you stop, and you wouldn’t want him to.

These heavily work-oriented sides of the both of you were what caused you two to meet in the first place. You were both in the local bar that pretty much all of the lawyers in Boston would frequent, celebrating wins on your recent cases. You chalked it up to the alcohol running through your veins and the pure happiness you were feeling, because that case was such a big win for you, as the reason why you so easily fell for Andy that night. Because you had always sworn to yourself that you would never get romantically involved with another lawyer. But Andy was different.

“How much longer do you need?” You asked him, already thinking of ways that you could rearrange things so that maybe, hopefully, the night wouldn’t be a total flop.  

It was quiet on Andy’s end for a moment, and you could tell that he was really thinking about his response. “No more than an hour. I promise.”

You glanced at the time displayed in your car; 7:14 pm. “Okay, I’ll call the restaurant and see if they can push our eight o’clock reservation to nine. And I’m on my way to your office now, so I can make sure that your hour is actually an hour.”

Most of the time, actually all of the time, an hour was never really an hour; it was always, always more. And you knew that for a fact because you were guilty of it too. Your respective workaholic natures were something that you both simultaneously loved and hated about each other.

“I love you,” Andy’s voice was soft and comforting.

Although those three words were pretty much second nature to hear after seven years of knowing Andy and five years of marriage, they never, ever failed to make your heart warm.

“Love you too,” You said and smiled to no one but yourself. “I should be there in twenty.”

• • •

The drive to Andy’s office was shorter than expected, which you were surprised about. However, you were unsurprised to only see Andy’s car in the parking lot when you pulled in; you swore that no one at that office worked harder than he did.

“Hi,” You said as you lightly rapped your knuckles against the open door of Andy’s office to grab his attention. His gaze was solely focused on his computer, and his eyebrows were knit together in a concentrated look that you had always found endearing.

When his blue eyes pulled away from his computer and landed on you, a smile found its way on his face. “Hi.”

You walked over to him, and he stood up from his desk, opening his arms which you wasted no time going into. As you wrapped your arms around Andy, the flooding sense of comfort that you felt made you sigh in contentment. Being in his arms always felt like being home.

“The reservation has been changed to nine,” You said, your words slightly muffled due to the way your face was pressed into his chest, but Andy still heard you.

“I’ll be done soon,” He told you, his voice getting lost in your hair.

When you pulled away from the embrace– it was reluctant at first, but then you remembered that there were actually things that needed to get done– you went to sit at the chair that was on the other side of the desk, shrugging your jacket off and placing it on the back of the chair. You nodded your head at Andy’s previous words, knowing that the definition of “soon” that you two had become accustomed to was different than what most people perceived it as.

As Andy went back to working on the case and you mindlessly watched him, a sudden wave of tiredness washed over you. Although your own day at work hadn’t been too chaotic, it was still pretty exhausting. A small yawn escaped your lips, and your eyes settled on the small-sized couch in the corner.

Your gaze was still trained on the grey couch when you heard the sound of a drawer opening, and when you looked at Andy, you saw that he was holding out a folded-up throw blanket for you to take. You grabbed it, and the familiar forest green color and softness stood out to you; it was the one you would usually keep in you guys’ living room.

“When did you start keeping this here?” You were already letting the blanket unfold and wrapping it around yourself.

“After the last time you came here and slept on the couch, and my suit jacket was horrible at keeping you warm.”

You smiled at the thoughtfulness behind the gesture. “Goddamnit, I love you.”

“And I love you,” Andy smiled back. “Now go take a quick nap, and I’ll wake you up in fifty minutes when I’m done with this, and we can finally make it to the reservation.”

You easily found comfort on the couch as you had done a few times before when you decided to join Andy during his late work nights. The couch was weirdly cozy, and you never knew if it was because of how tired you were that made it feel so nice or if it genuinely felt that way. Unsurprisingly, it didn’t take long for you to drift off to sleep.

• • •

“Hey,” A soft voice slowly pulled you from the unconscious state you were in. “Honey, wake up.”

You mumbled a slight protest, pulling the blanket draped over you higher so that it shielded your face. Then, you remembered where you were.

You pulled the blanket back down, and when you opened your eyes, you saw Andy’s face; he was kneeling down next to you.

“What time is it?”

He evaded the question and instead said, “I’m sorry.”

“Andy,” You sighed as you sat up from the couch. You felt around for your phone and grabbed it, almost immediately checking the time; 10:03 pm. “Andy.”

“I fucked up,” His voice was quiet, and you pulled your eyes away from your phone and looked at him.

“What happened?” You asked as you tried to rub the remaining sleepiness out of your eyes. Even though you had apparently taken an almost two-hour nap, you still felt extremely tired.

“It was eight, and I wasn’t finished with what I needed for the case, but at that point, I didn’t even care and just wanted to go to dinner with you,” Andy took a seat down next to you on the small couch as he began to launch into his explanation. You watched him with intent eyes. “But, then I saw you sleeping, and you looked so peaceful and tired, and I didn’t wanna wake you. So, I kept working, and I was gonna wake you by eight-thirty, but the time got away from me, and the next thing I knew, it was nine.”

You didn’t say anything in response at first. Instead, you leaned back against the couch, closing your eyes and once again pulling the blanket over your head because there was nothing else you really wanted to do.

“I’m sorry. I know that you really wanted to go to the restaurant tonight.”

You finally decided to say something. “It’s okay.”

You felt the blanket shift, and you opened your eyes to see Andy coming underneath it and pulling some over him– luckily, it was long enough– so that the two of you were cocooned inside of it. “It’s not. You deserve to be mad.”

You considered his words and knew he was right, but you weren’t mad. Honestly, if you were a thousand percent truthful with yourself, you didn’t give a fuck about the dinner and the restaurant. More so, you cared about what it represented, or at least what your mind had warped it into representing.

It had been so long since you and Andy had spent a night together that was solely romantic and didn’t involve the two of you lounging about in your home eating takeout or being completely exhausted from work. You had desperately wanted something that resembled how it used to be between you two before things became so domesticated. For reasons you couldn’t decipher, you wanted a glimpse back into the beginning, almost honeymoon-like, stages of your relationship with him. And it seemed as if it was something that was entirely out of reach at this point.

“But, the night’s not a complete bust.” Andy’s words pulled you out of your scattered thoughts. However, they did nothing but confuse you.  

Before you could ask him what he meant by his statement, he pulled off the blanket that was draped over you both, and it was then that you noticed the set up of Chinese food takeout on Andy’s desk. The food was plated nicely on disposable plates that you were sure were from the office’s break room, and there was even a lit candle in the middle of the desk. You noticed that the candle was the one you had gotten Andy for Christmas with the sole purpose of him having it in his office; apparently, the scent was supposed to be very calming.

Looking at the setup made you finally fully realize that the restaurant and dinner did not matter. In fact, this was far better than being in a fancy restaurant surrounded by other people and trying new food that you probably wouldn’t like anyway. This was much more romantic, and you loved every aspect of it.

It made you feel slightly frustrated at yourself that you had been making such a big deal out of it all in the first place. It wasn’t the restaurant that would make you feel reminded of the early aspects of your relationship. It was simply being with Andy that would, and always did, make you feel that way and more.

You did not know why you were on the verge of tears, but you did know that they were nothing but joyous. You looked over at Andy and noticed that he was staring at you so that he could gauge your reaction to everything. You smiled at him and wrapped your arms around his neck. “This is great. So great. Fuck, I can barely even form words right now.”

A breath of a laugh fell from your lips, and when you pulled back from the embrace, you placed a kiss on his cheek, his beard grazing your chin in a way that you had always loved.

“I’m glad and relieved,” Andy said as the two of you made your way over to his desk. “It’s definitely not high-end restaurant quality, but it is from our favorite place on Bleeker Street.”

You settled in your chair, your mouth watering at the food in front of you. You hadn’t realized how hungry you were until then. “Maybe we’re not meant to go to fancy restaurants anymore. We’re just takeout people now. And I think I’m okay with that.”

Andy’s lips upturned in a small smile. “Me too.”

“Now tell me everything about this godforsaken case,” You said and then took a bite from your egg roll. You always enjoyed hearing about his cases; it was a contrast from the work that you did that you always found refreshing, although most of the cases were more bleak if anything.

As Andy launched into an in-depth telling about what the case was about and the issues arising with it, you looked at him adoringly and listened intently as you both ate your food.

There was no grand dinner, but everything was still romantic, actually even more so. To you and him both, it was still a night to remember.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

let me know your thoughts<3

[haik-choo]

karasuno first years out late w/ their s/o

request: Could you write how 1st years (yachi too pls🥺) going out with their s/o late at night ?

a/n: this is such a cute little concept i -- 

[KARASUNO FIRST YEARS OUT LATE AT NIGHT WITH THEIR S/O]

-tsukishima, kageyama, yamaguchi, hinata, yachi

tsukishima kei.

not gonna lie, he’s often awake late at night. he’s a night owl and doesn’t mind sacrificing his sleep to watch some youtube videos

occasionally, he even goes out late at night, slipping past his parents and brother’s room and softly closing the front door with his headphones covering his ears and his hands stuffed in his pockets

so when you text him at 3am and ask if he can go out with you to the convenience store, he agrees in seconds to meet you at the halfway point between your houses

wastes no time in putting on his sneakers and a hoodie; he wants to get there quickly so that you aren’t left out by yourself

tsukishima knows there’s creeps out there, which is exactly why he jogs to the halfway point and is relieved when he’s the first one there

as soon as he sees you in the distance he fast walks to catch up to you, and slips his hand into yours

he totally brings bluetooth earbuds so that you two can listen to the same music instead of his wired headphones <3 uwu

is always on the lookout for any weirdos, and if he spots someone eyeing you up he shoots them the nastiest glare

eventually wraps his arms around your shoulder while your hand is sitll in his and its that cute little thing where your arms is across your chest holding his hand </3

pays for whatever you get at the store, ignores your complaints and tells you to shut up when you continue to insist on paying

“im trying to be a good boyfriend for once, for the love of god PLEASE shut up”

secretly takes a candid photo of you at some point in the night and sets it as his home screen -- NOT his lock screen, and when you see it he outright denies having taken it

tsukishima: you told me to take a picture of you

you: stop lying i know you’re a closet hopeless romantic 

convinces you to stop at the park and eat the snacks you both got there, music still humming in your ears as the moonlight washes you both in cool tones

tsukishima when he’s alone with you is so soft -- he literally kisses your hand and temple and mutters very softly “love you” 

all in all, tsukishima kei is the perfect night-owl boyfriend to go on snack-runs with 

kageyama tobio.

"why would i go out right now. do you know what time it is. i have practice in the morning”

kags really out here kinda hurtin’ your feelin’s ngl boy doesn’t understand the vibes LOL

honestly you probably woke him up, he’s asleep at like ten every night (even tho he still has homework to do he just flat-out ignores it LOL) 

only agrees to go out walking with you because you said he could bring his volleyball and you’d toss a few for him....and also because he’s a little worried because it’s so dark out

doesn’t walk with you to the park but meets you there LOL

he deadass has his wholeass duffel bad with the ball, two waterbottles, two towelettes, volleyball sneakers and everything

“you know,,,,we’re not playing a game, right, tobio?”

“yeah???? and??? what’s your point”

acts nonchalant but is totally having fun and is lowkey glad you asked him to go out so late because it’s cool out, there’s no one to bother him, and you just look...really good under the stars

he’s not a cheesy person but...god you just take his breath away sometimes. not that he’ll ever say that though

you ask to take a break like thirty minutes in because you are LITERALLY dying meanwhile he hasn’t even broken a sweat (”you’re already tired? maybe you should workout more” “shut UP kageyama”)

you both sit on the bench, and you’re lowkey waiting for him to reach for your hand but they’re just folded in his lap as he stares out in the nothingness of night

kageyama can’t take a hint. we know this. he’s incapable of knowing what you want unless you flat out tell him; so you have to be a very honest person

he doesn’t even really initiate skinship, not because he doesn’t want to, but just because it never really crosses his mind

plus he doesn’t feel the need to constantly show affection because he thinks it’s obvious that he likes you

despite this, he is good at spotting weird people, and he’s pretty protective of you, so you’re completely safe with him. trust him, he’ll keep you safe

all in all, have patience and stamina because kags will play volleyball with you until you pass out. also, he loves you 

yamaguchi tadashi.

is in bed by 11pm but doesn’t actually go to sleep until two am because he’s scrolling through tiktok on his phone

sees your text about wanting to go out for a late night walk and maybe go through the little forest near your house and automatically sends a text that says “ill meet you at your window! can you pack some snacks? :)”

he walks all the way to your house, even if it’s more convenient to meet halfway because he wants to protect you! he’s not the strongest nor is he the most intimidating, so all he really has to offer is his presence

despite not being strong nor scary, yams literally has eagle eye. you can’t tell me that he can’t read people in a heartbeat -- he’s extremely perceptive 

also texts you to not bring a jacket because he’s bringing on of his own for you !!! so sweet what the hell

he waits at your front door and when you step out he automatically pushes his volleyball jacket into your hands and he takes the bag of snacks from you and sticks out one of his hands UGH such a gentleman

lets you ramble about anything and stares at your side profile as he listens 

joins in with a few quips here and there but ultimately is pretty quite and lets you speak or lets the silence cozy into the conversation

sees that there’s a guy sitting on a bench up the road and he switches places with you so that you’re further away from the stranger 

also wraps a protective hand around your waist until you both are past the random dude but yams will glance behind yall every once in a while

when you two reach the mini forest he ends up taking the lead claiming that he knows a good spot

and damn, he’s right

it’s a little clearing that is illuminated solely by the moonlight and he sets the bag of snacks down beside him before sitting down himself, apologizing for not bringing a blanket that you two could sit on 

pats the spot next to him so that you sit right beside him and he leans back with his hand on yours ONGMIRG 

is the super cheesy type and tells you that you look really pretty and that,,,he kind of wants to kiss you

you: *experiencing heart palpitations* and you did this for what. 

yamaguchi: ...because i love you?

you: *K.O*

all in all, yamaguchi is the boyfriend that completely indulges your late-night escapades <3 

hinata shoyo.

is either completely fast asleep and doesn’t see your text or was awake and not planning to sleep for the next five hours, no in-between

but if he’s awake and sees your text, he agrees right away and asks where you want to meet up and what time because homeboy probably has to bike to get there AgAGAGAGA

literally doesn’t even show up in sneakers. he’s wearing sandals and shorts with a short sleeve top 

“i came in my pjs”

“i see that.”

asks if you two can bike around instead because he doesn’t want to have to wheel his bike around for like an hour 

he tells you to hold on tight because the bike was built for one person, and when you press against his back his warmth is literally so,,,comforting 

has no sense of awareness and will scream going down a hill in the middle of a neighborhood, no fucks given

so, no, he doesn’t notice any weriod people even if there are some around

you always end up running into some weird people and you get new interesting stories every other day because let’s be honest hinata is a magnet for crazy shit and crazy people (usually crackheads) 

you both just ride around as he talks about his day, usually his sister always comes up in the conversation( “she asked me to marry you the other day” “doirhgAEROIHFGRE SHOYO WHAT” “what? i told her i would. i keep my promises!”)

after like thirty minutes he begs for a break and you stop at a little 24/7 ice cream store that is run by the sweetest elderly couple

you share a sundae because you don’t want to eat too much this late at night

he plops on the bench right outside the store with his bike leaning against the metal handles, and h snuggles up to you and watches you scroll on your phone

he talks a little here and there, but for the most part, he goes quiet, and it’s during this time where you’re unaware of his gaze that he just takes his time drinking in your features in the yellow light of the lamppost 

he can’t read the mood most times, but this time he does, and he stays quiet, and he thinks to himself

that he really will marry you one day

all in all, hinata gives you the impulsive young teenage experience of late night bike rides while eating his fair share of ice cream

yachi hitoka.

another either or, except this time she’s either fast asleep or stressing over homework and the nine tests she has the next day

when you ask if she can go on a walk with you she’s hesitant because she doesn’t want to get in trouble with her mom and she’s a total goody goody and terrified of doing anything reckless; but then she remembers that her mom was on a business trip and so she, very cautiously, says yes

you: good. i’m outside your door btw

yachi: i never had a choice did i

you have to meet her at her house because she’s way too scared to walk by herself at night; she might even make you factime her as you commute because she’s worried for you

jumps at every little thing, even the crows cawing make her shit herself

instictively grabs onto your sleeve and nervously look around the entire time, to the point where she doesn’t hear what you say

so you offer to go to a little cafe that’s still open and right away she nods

she’s so adorable, she bows really deeply when you two walk into the store and apologizes for it being so late

and finally, because you two are safe, she’s calm and smiling as she sips at her strawberry smoothie

awkwardly and very shyly reaches out for your hand on the table and gently lays her palm on yours

canon: yachi totally has freckles and you can’t convince me otherwise 

her face is red and her freckles are just on display you can’t help but coo at her and tuck some hair behind her ear because god could she get any cuter?

you two end up staying for like a hour and a half and very shyly she asks if you could walk her home 

and this time on the walk she’s not overly cautious and seems to enjoy the nighttime breeze and your hand softly clasping hers

does that cute thing where she lays her head on your shoulder or arm while you both are walking and looks up at you through her eyelashes and asks if you could give her a kiss on the cheek </3

you: stop. please. im going to die.

when you’re at her door she literally just stands there awkwardly for a few seconds before tilting her head upwards and pressing her lips to yours and then promptly running inside

video calls you three seconds afterwards to make sure you get home safely 

all in all, you might need to be the impulsive one, but yachi enjoys spending late night time with you more than she admits. also please kiss her thanks      

[ickle-ronniekins]

home for the holidays || christmas promises

A/N: hiii everyone! ya girls are here to provide a christmas collab entitled “home for the holidays” that we couldn’t stop freaking out about together like a bunch of dorks. we’ll each be writing two installments each for a four-part total series! alexa ( @harrysweasleys ) will be posting chapter two! super excited for this and thank yoooou to alexa for being just as excited about this collab and for being so patient with my wacky schedule!

desc: would it really be christmas at the burrow without a snowball fight just as the clock strikes midnight on christmas? fred’s happy to have you at his favorite place during his favorite time of year, and the excitement of the holidays seems to have him in a lovey-dovey mood.

pairing: fred x reader

word count: 1.4k

alexa and erica’s combined taglist(s): @mintlibri @seppys-return-to-madness @how-do-life-does @fopdoodledane @fredd-weasley @iprobablyshipit91 @laneygthememequeen @snakesonaplane-7 @keoghans @acciotwinz @the-hufflepuff-of-221b @62442-am @wtfweasleyy @thoseofgreatambition @sleep-i-ness @shadychaoticcollection @haphazardhufflepuff @afriendlyneighborhoodhufflepuff @kageyama-i-want-tobiors @letsfightsomeorcs @theweasleysredhair @hxfflxpxffs @wand3ringr0s3 @finecole @angelinathebook @highly-acidic @zreads @susceptible-but-siriusexual @hollands-weasley @andromedaa-tonks @cappsikle @mytreec @imseeinggred @idont-knowrn @auroraboringalis57 @godricsswords @annasofiaearlobe @alwaysasadaesthetic @starlightweasley @thisismysketchbook @izzytheninja @imboredandneedalife @hemmoporro @valwritesx @hannalannno @heavenlymidnight @msmimimerton @oh-for-merlins-sake @grierpilots @mikumana @pit-and-the-pen @diary-of-an-onliner @theweirdsideofstuff @vogueweasley @hufflrpuffforfred @phuvioqhile @marvelettesassemble @almostweepingbanana

“Fred! Y/N! Would you two get back out here! Ginny, blimey, can’t you wait a moment before sending another one my way? Bloody hell!”

George’s yelps echoed from outside the Burrow. His voice sounded very loud, because that’s how it always seemed during a snowfall, didn’t it? It always seemed especially quiet as the ground became covered in a blanket of sparkly white. It’s as if the falling snow could silence the entire atmosphere.

You tried to push Fred toward the snowball fight that was unfolding between his siblings, but he yanked you back to him and pressed you against the side of the house, hidden beneath the shadows of the night. The faint light of the moon highlighted his twisted features of hunger.

“Fred, they’ve called us five times now, I reckon we’ve got to get back out there, haven’t we? Besides, poor George is getting absolutely pummeled by your sister,” a laugh escaped you as you watched another snowball smack George right across the head. He groaned in frustration and shoved Ron into a nearby snowbank for laughing at him.

“Don’t care, that game’s for children anyway,” Fred told you. You could see his breath in the air and it was becoming increasingly difficult to not pull him into the nearby garden shed.

You snorted. “Says the boy who suggested it in the first place.”

“It was only so I could get you alone out here, actually.”

Fred revelled in the sneakiness of your actions. His parents were just inside, his siblings a few mere feet away, and yet he was about two bloody seconds away from pulling your jacket right off --

“Freddie!”

He hummed against your lips and listened intently for that moan he knew all too well, the one that sent him into a dizzying spiral each and every time he heard it. “Can’t help it, love,” he cooed as you pushed playfully against his chest. He secretly loved it, you fighting your own overwhelming instincts and trying to shove him away from you, despite yourself, because he knew how much you wanted it too. Your eyes glistened with obvious yearning.

Against your better judgement, you decided to indulge your own hunger and yanked him closer by the collar of his jacket. “What’s the matter, Freddie? Didn’t get enough last night?”

A slight sigh escaped him and he was immediately transported to your final evening in the castle before returning home for the Christmas holidays. The copious amounts of firewhisky had earned him a night full of heated kisses and a morning filled with a throbbing headache. But here he was, just hours later, and it was nothing that the feeling of your lips on his couldn’t cure. Though, as his mouth moved against yours, he began to feel drunk all over again.

He trailed his hands across your hip bones and underneath your shirt a bit, his fingertips grazing your exposed skin. It’s as though every part of him that touched you was setting you on fire. “No, darling, I definitely did not get enough.”

“Okay, then let me make you a promise.”

You piqued his interest. Fred pulled away but kept close as he waited for your proposition. He couldn’t help but notice the sparkle of the snowflakes that had fallen onto your eyelashes, and how the tip of your nose and cheeks were so rosy from the cold weather. If he didn’t get you alone, and really alone, quick enough, he felt like he was going to spontaneously combust.

“If you behave, and help me obliterate Ron for getting me square in the gut with a snowball, then maybe we can pick up where we left off last night sometime later.”

He wiggled his eyebrows at you as he raked his teeth through his bottom lip, eager for later to be right bloody now.

He nearly growled before pushing you back up against the side of the house, his mouth eagerly finding yours again, before a rogue snowball (definitely charmed by one of his siblings) smacked him right in the side of the head. He heard Ron, George, and Ginny fall into a fit of raucous laughter before running out of sight yet again.

He rolled his eyes and turned back toward you, nearly melting at the sight of your sparkly eyes and rosy cheeks. You sniffled a bit -- the cold always did make your nose a little sniffly -- and you pulled gently on the collar of his jacket. He felt heat rise up in his legs, into his stomach and his arms, and finally felt his face flush a crimson red, all because of how absolutely bloody adorable you looked into your little pompom hat and scarf that was far too large it looked like it was swallowing you whole. And yet, you were the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen in his life.

“What?” you asked, raking your bottom lip through your teeth at the sight of him going googly-eyed.

“Nothing,” he said quietly before tightening his grip around your waist and resting comfortably against you, his breathing finding synchronization with yours. “You know mum’s been absolutely dying to have you here, and for Christmas, no less.. I reckon she’ll even make you a sweater.”

You arched an eyebrow in surprise. “Oh really?”

“Yeah, really.”

“Well that’s kind of her,” you replied, the rosy colour of your lips resembling that of your cheeks, and Fred found himself internally whining and desperately trying to suppress his feelings of eager want down into the depths of his soul. Later. You were making it bloody difficult though, especially when you said, “I’d love my own sweater knitted by your mum. But there’s nothing quite like wearing yours.”

It sent his heart soaring. He honestly felt himself dropping to his knees with weakness, and he swore to himself that if he had a ring, he’d ask you to be his wife right then and there -- no script, no plan, just unwavering love. He leaned himself further against you to hold himself upright and you giggled teasingly at the weight of him on top of you.

He knew how much you loved wearing his sweater. Or any of his clothing, really, but especially the cozy sweater. You wore it more than he did, actually, but he didn’t mind. Looked way better on you than it did him, didn’t it? He loved how the sleeves were so long it went past your hands, how the oversized material hung loosely over your body, but in that adorable type of way he loved to see each and every time you two would wake up from a nap in the school dormitories. But if there was one thing he loved more than seeing you in it, it was taking it off of you.

Bloody hell, mate, pull it together.

He bit down on his lip and jokingly pulled your hat further down your head so it was almost covering your eyebrows, and you scrunched your nose and giggled, once again making the butterflies in his stomach dance around in delight. “I’m really happy you’re here.”

You batted your eyelashes at him, “Freddie boy, how can you go from being so incredibly alluring to so sweet and sincere in mere seconds?”

“Dunno,” he replied, ignoring the calls from his siblings again, “but I reckon it’s one of the reasons you fell in love with me, right?”

He meant it as a joke, as he did mostly everything. He expected you to laugh, or to playfully punch him in the gut, but was pleasantly surprised when all you did was blink as the gentlest of smiles tug at your lips. “Of course it is.”

Just then, in the quiet stillness of the night, you both heard the church bells in the village begin to ring, signaling midnight and the official start of the holiday.

Cheers from the front yard erupted, and by the look in your eye, Fred could tell that you figured you should both get back out there and celebrate with the rest of them. He agreed, but he forced just a few more seconds, testing fate or destiny or whatever it was, and as you began to walk out toward them, he gently spun you around and caught your lips with his. There was nothing hungry or wild about it; it was, if anything, one of the purest exchanges you’d both ever shared.

When you both pulled away, you hovered close to one another, your breath visible in the cold winter air, and Fred made sure to keep his hands wrapped around your neck and entangled in the strands of your hair. He caressed your cheek with his thumb, gently, tenderly. His voice was so soft, so quiet, his words gently landed in your ears like the snowflakes soundlessly melting into the ground. “I love you, beautiful. Happy Christmas.”

“Happy Christmas, Freddie.”

[mieohmy]

𝗌𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗌𝗈𝗎𝗋 | 𝗃𝖾𝗈𝗇 𝗐𝗈𝗇𝗐𝗈𝗈

PAIRING: CEO boss! jeon wonwoo x secretary! reader 

GENRE: fluff, angst, humor, office au

WC: 5k (whoops got carried away- i mean its wonwoo)

NOTES: mentions of death, depression 

SUMMARY: you loved being a secretary, the work and stress included. but your ‘stone cold’ boss was really testing your limits in more ways than one. alternatively, who knew mighty CEO jeon wonwoo was such a softie?

update: part two can be found here !

update 2: final part → here 

❋

“Yes, sir. Also, the opening ceremony is today at 7pm. Would you like me to set up your chauffeur?” The man nods. “Yes, make sure to finish the layout for tomorrow. And the catalog by Thursday. That’s all, you’re dismissed.” You bow politely before turning and exiting his office. 

You take two steps forward before displaying a scowl and muttering, “never get a break. not even a thank you. just wait, jeon wonwoo, one day i-“ “Y/n!” A voice snaps you out of your trance, spotting Seungkwan walking your way. 

Greeting him, you ask, “What’s up?” “We’re getting food tonight. Team dinner at 7. Can you make it?” he says. You sigh before replying apologetically, “Sorry.... boss wants me to finish something up for tomorrow.” 

Seungkwan taps his feet in disapproval. “The CEO is still giving you more work? When will that man ever let you have a break?” You grit your teeth, attempting to smile. Seungkwan stares at the CEO's office. 

“Y/n, you work the hardest out of all of us, and you have to deal with him every day. If there’s anyone who deserves a rest, it’s you. Our team’s planning on going to the beach on the weekend since we have Friday off. You should join us. It’ll be really fun!“

Contemplating for a moment, you’re about to accept before you suddenly remember what Friday is, eyes widening. Turning to Seungkwan, you smile sadly. “I really-like you don’t even know-really want to go, but I have something really important on Friday. I’m so sorry.” He nods, reassuring you it’s fine. “Well, you can join us on Saturday then!” 

You bow, biting your lip as you continue on. You totally forgot what day Friday was. 

❋

The rest of your shift was rough. Wonwoo, AKA your horrible boss, didn’t seem to want to give you a break. The past few weeks had been very tightly packed with the upcoming debut, and although you understood it was very important, sometimes it felt like your boss didn’t know you were human too. 

Waking up at 5 am, driving to his place and setting up, and then getting to work was exhausting. Not to mention the late nights working on assignments. It all came with being a secretary, but recently, you didn’t know if you could keep going. Maybe it had something to do with your boss’s attitude as well. 

Jeon Wonwoo, CEO of one of the largest writing and printing companies. Exactly how you expect. Handsome, cold, quiet. You’re pretty sure he’s rejected more than a hundred women who attempted to ask him out. What did he even do for fun? Lame word searches?

When you first started working as his secretary, you had at least one breakdown a day. Everything you did was wrong, Wonwoo’s ‘redo it again’, echoing in your mind. He never cared about your feelings, just your work. You needed the job to help your family since it had good pay, and your siblings were focused on school. So it was up to you to provide for your family that you weren’t even close with.

You and your coworkers loved to complain about wonwoo’s cold attitude and the workload he gave out. Sure he was handsome, but it didn’t matter to you since his attitude was such a shutdown. You blamed him for not having a social life or a boyfriend, but of course, he didn’t care. 

That just made you want to work even harder. You stayed up countless nights practicing, studying to be perfect. Until Wonwoo tolerated you. Everyone knew you as Jeon Wonwoo’s longest secretary. It wasn’t easy work, but it made you feel proud, and you were able to push through working for him. 

At least before recently. Wonwoo was extremely busy with the preparations, and so were you. You understood, he was stressed, but was taking it out on you okay? You really contemplated quitting, but this time of the year was extremely important, so you would have to wait until after the new debut passed. I mean, you were kind enough to start the resignation after finishing the event, unlike another person you knew.

Wonwoo calls you into his office late that night, the floor almost empty. You walk in, carrying the same tea you always brought at the now perfected temperature. Setting it down, you bow before asking, “you called for me, Mr. Jeon?” You can tell he’s frustrated by his ruffled hair and wrinkled collar. Your fingers itch, wanting to fix it. 

“Finish the chart for tomorrow. I want you to adjust my schedule since father’s coming by. Cancel everything before 10.” You tense, feeling the frustration course through you. “But sir, I already got all the-“ “I don’t care, change it. You can go now.” You tightly bow and leave, fuming in anger. 

❋

You’re not surprised you only got three hours of sleep. It was a regular thing these days. Groaning, you get ready as usual like every day, the schedule drilled into your brain. You grab a shirt, frowning as you remember the one time Mr. Jeon called your fashion taste revolting and ordered you to a complete wardrobe change. 

It was finally Friday, the day you were anticipating the whole week. Also the one day you got off from work early and seeing Mr. Jeon’s face. You couldn’t wait until 5 when you were done and could prepare for later. The whole week was awful, you’re pretty sure you looked like a raccoon with the amount of sleep you got. 

You’re typing furiously at your desk when Seokmin comes by. His footsteps alert you. “Oh, hey Seokmin. What’s up?” He grins. “Did Seungkwan tell you about what we’re doing later today?” You attempt to smile. “Yeah, I’m sorry I can’t make it. I’m busy later. Can’t wait to get off.” He claps, rubbing his hands together. “It’s alright. Don’t work too hard.” 

You smile, winking. “Don’t worry. And try not to have too much fun without me!” The buzzing on your desk interrupts you, causing you to groan. “What does he want now?”

Walking in, you find Wonwoo signing documents. He doesn’t even look up as he says, “I need you to complete the finalizing documents right now.” You pause, processing the information. “Wait, but those will take me at least four hours. My shift ends in one.” 

He finally looks up, face devoid of any emotion. “Well, that’s your job. You’re expected to do it.” You feel your heart speed up, tightening your hands into fists. You respond shakily, “I’m sorry sir, but there’s something really important I have to do tonight. I can get Mr. Lee to finish it. Can’t you let me go this once?” 

“But why? You’re supposed to do what I ask?” His voice sounds annoyed, bored even. You scoff, feeling your eyes burn. “Those last couple of weeks I’ve been doing everything you asked, even more. Don’t you think I deserve a break?” 

“You signed up to be my secretary. What kind of breaks do you expect? Things are very tense with the new debut now, so don’t expect me to take pity and let you go just because you did what I said,” Wonwoo retorts.

That was it.

You hated yourself. You hated yourself for snapping. But at the same time, you didn’t. 

You slam your papers on the table, shaking. “I work basically 24/7, every day, running errands for you and doing everything you tell me.” Your voice cracks, and you feel hot tears run down your face. 

“And you don’t even have the respect to treat me like a human being? I wake up immediately thinking about what you’re going to make me do for the rest of the day.” A sob escapes you. 

Wiping your tears angrily, you continue to stare at him with wide, furious eyes. “I go to sleep thinking about what I have to do for you the next day. But you don’t even thank me. Not once. No appreciation when I try to impress you and go above and beyond. And then you won’t even let me have one break? I don’t even get vacations or holidays off!”

You sniffle, body shaking, as you let the words sink in. “I signed up to be a secretary, not disrespected.” And with that, you walk out with tears pouring down your face, grabbing as much of your stuff as you can and leaving, ignoring the shocked whispers and startled questions.  

❋

Once you get home, you slap yourself. What did you just do? What did you just say to your boss? Oh god, ex-boss now. You’re dead. Officially. You feel numb like you just watched a confusing movie and were trying to process everything. 

You want to bury yourself in the ground. Or become a rock. That’d be way nicer than being yourself right now. 

But you have to continue on. You don’t even care if you’re going out wearing sweats and a hoodie. He wouldn’t care. After buying everything, you drive to the spot. You pass blurs, barely paying attention as you blankly stare at the road. 

Once you get out, you feel the drops, glancing up. You didn’t realize it was raining while you were driving. You let the water pour over you, making your way to the familiar stone.

Stopping in front, you sink to your knees. 

“Dad...I’m so sorry I’m late. Can you believe I basically threw a tantrum in front of my boss? Well, ex-boss?” Laughing weakly, you wipe the tears you didn’t notice had run down your face. “I don’t have a job anymore, that’s for sure.” 

You look around, your whole body soaked now. Softly, you arrange the flowers neatly in front of his grave. “Are you still proud of me dad?” You smile weakly, adjusting yourself comfortably on the cold wet ground. “I’m so sorry... happy anniversary, still. Another year passed. How are you?” 

❋

You spend days at home, never leaving your bed, only allowing yourself to mope about your life. Your phone is spammed with texts and calls. Probably from coworkers, you figured. You didn’t have enough energy to respond. 

You sighed for the millionth time. Everyone had probably heard about your childish rant in wonwoo's office. How could you let yourself break like that? No one had contacted you and deemed you officially fired, but you knew it the moment you opened your mouth. Maybe finally going outside and getting snacks would cheer you up. 

Cringing, you saw yourself in the mirror. Just like someone who got broken up with by their partner. I mean, it’s not like you had a job anymore or anyone to impress, so you just shrugged and went out for the first in a while.

Entering the store, you walk down an aisle, glancing at the options. You’re squatting, choosing between banana or strawberry when you spot movement in the corner of your vision. It’s just a man looking at the ice cream, but it’s what he’s wearing that catches your attention. 

You raise an eyebrow. Who goes to a mart in a full suit and tie like that? Scoffing internally, you bite the inside of your cheek. Ha, he looks like- The man suddenly turns, and you can never mistake that face. 

BEKDJRE WHAT IS MR. JEON DOING HERE?? You whip your head back, hoping, praying, that he doesn’t recognize you in your horrible clothes. Your heart pounding loudly, you stand up, deciding just to get the heck out of there before-

Oh ****. Why does he have to stand right next to you? 

You internally freak out, don’t make eye contact I swear to god y/n if you do you’ll- 

“What do you recommend? Melon or banana?” You recognize his deep voice and freeze. Is he talking to you? Maybe he doesn’t know who you are??

Facing away from him, you respond in a croaky, low voice. “U-uh banana?” You catch him nodding in the corner of your eye. 

Time to escape. You turn, briskly walking away until a hand abruptly grabs your wrist, preventing you from leaving. Panicking, you don’t move, not wanting to expose your identity. What does this man want??

The hand on your wrist doesn’t loosen, instead, it tightens and spins you around until you’re face to face with him. Your now-former boss, Jeon Wonwoo. 

Surprisingly, he doesn’t have an angry look on his face. Instead, he simply says, “Y/n, I know it’s you. It seemed like you when you walked in. And the fact that you chose banana instead of melon for me because you know I hate melon confirms it.” 

You open your mouth before lamely responding, “Could’ve been a lucky guess?” 

❋

 You would’ve never expected yourself to be outside a grocery mart at 1 am with jeon wonwoo.

Awkwardly shuffling on your feet, you watched as wonwoo paid for your treats. He insisted on it for some reason, and you knew you couldn’t beat him when he looked at you with that face. Chills ran down your spine whenever you thought about it.

When he finishes, you walk side by side out the door, a silence between the two of you. You wait a couple seconds before you can’t take it anymore. 

You quickly fall to your knees in front of him, head down as you plead, “Please forgive me, Mr. Jeon. I-I didn’t mean anything I said. I was just extremely stressed- I completely understand if you never want to see my face again, although I’m not sure why you confronted me today and bought stuff for me but it doesn’t matter anymore- It was completely rude of me, and I just hope you’ll accept my apology.” Finishing your ramble, you keep your head bowed and eyes squeezed shut as you await his response. 

You almost don’t notice it, it was so gentle. Wonwoo’s hand slowly reaches forward and tilts your chin up, and you don’t realize your heart speeding up. He squats in front of you, his face seems surprisingly amused. 

You would’ve never expected the words that came out of his mouth next, either.

“I’m sorry, y/n. I realized the workload I put on you, and it wasn’t wrong of you to burst out on me. I’m afraid I’m not good with words, but after you disappeared, I realized how much you do for the office. Truly, I appreciate your hard work. Hopefully, you can come back to work once you feel fit.” 

You stare at him, processing the words that the CEO of one of the biggest printing companies just said. 

You stay still, eyes still boring into his until you’re finally able to break out of it. You abruptly stand up, dusting yourself off. You breathe a sigh of relief, muttering, “thank you for not firing me.” You clap your hand over your mouth, surprised eyes moving to look at wonwoo. 

You watch as wonwoo’s lips slowly turn up, letting out a quiet chuckle. You blink. Did he just laugh? Like fr? Oh my god, you have to tell Seungkwan. His voice interrupts you. “I should drive you back to your place, it’s getting late.” 

Your eyes widen in shock. Shaking your head, you reply, “oh no, it’s fine. I’ll walk home. It’s not far.” He insists, and of course, you aren’t able to say no. 

It’s an awkward drive as you direct your boss to your apartment. Once you arrive, you quickly thank him, and he smiles. What the-

“Well, I hope to see you soon at work, secretary y/n.”

You can only nod, dumbfounded. You had never seen him smile before, and it was kinda nice.

You numbly wave goodbye as he drives off, entering your apartment and crashing into bed. 

❋

After two days, you’re back in action. The second the elevator doors open, a swarm of people rushed up to you. You stand there as people begin talking, asking questions. You feel like a celebrity being interviewed by paparazzi.

You take a step forward, pushing past everyone. It didn’t feel right to have to answer their questions. You settle at your office, politely asking people to stop asking. Eventually, the crowd leaves.

You’re unpacking the stuff you took home in a blaze of anger when you hear footsteps approach. Sighing, you turn around. “I’m sorry, I don’t- ..Dokyeom?” 

“Y/n!!! What the frick happened? All we know is that you stormed out of the building and didn’t come back for a week!! And with our project, things were going crazy without you...”

Grimacing, you say, “I know, I know, I’m sorry.  It’s stupid, but I’m back for real now. Promise.  I’ll explain it all later, I’ve got a lot of catching up to do.” 

Dokyeom sighs, giving you one last ‘you better not forget’ before leaving you. 

It takes hours, but you’re finally able to get wonwoo’s schedule up to date. You check the time. Shoot. Wonwoo usually expects tea at this time.

You quickly run over to the drink station, hoping no one comes up to you. You glance around, mostly everyone’s focused on their work and staring at their computer screens. 

You’re pouring the hot water when a familiar voice calls your name. Turning, Wonwoo comes into view. You immediately jump, causing the hot water to splash onto your hand. 

Letting out a hiss of pain, you drop the cup. The sound alerts the workers in the room, most beginning to notice your presence. 

Wonwoo quickly walks over to you, gently taking your hands in his. “Are you alright?” You gape at him, and you’re pretty sure everyone else in the room is dumbfounded too. Whispers immediately break out. 

You snatch your hands from him and quickly bow. “I’m fine, thank you, sir.” Forgotten tea, you dash to the bathroom. Huffing, you place your hands on the sink.

What happened to your boss and why do you kinda like it? The feeling of his warm hands over yours causes you to shiver. You punch the sink, grumbling. 

“Ughh seriously, what’s wrong with this guy?  I yell at him and suddenly he becomes this nice guy? And then in front of everyone too?”

❋

It doesn’t stop after that. For days, jeon wonwoo would somehow make his way to you and act all nice. Sometimes in front of others, and sometimes when it’s just you two in his office. You would always feel hot and nervous afterward randomly. 

It began spreading around the office. What happened to CEO Jeon and why did he become so nice to you? You heard some of the rumors, ‘probably slept together’ ‘did they find out some juicy secret about him? ..’

It was annoying, but you tried to ignore it. You were able to explain everything to doykeom and seungkwan. They were the only ones who knew about the late-night grocery mart trip and wonwoo’s sudden kindness. 

You wanted to confront him, really. And you tried, but he would just say it was because you were his secretary that worked so hard for so long. 

You wanted it to stop. You wanted it to stop cause you liked this side of him, and you didn’t want to admit it.

❋

It all changed one day when you received a text at work. From a number that you didn’t recognize. At first. 

After reading it, you immediately shot up from your desk. Wonwoo came from his office, walking over to you, but you hurriedly made an excuse and ran out, leaving him surprised. 

Groaning, you noticed the rain. Perfect timing... You braced yourself and ran through the pouring rain. You had to get there, no matter what. You were soaked, gasping for air, once you reached the stone. 

They left. You stood there, staring down at it. 

It was just you and the rain.

Until it wasn’t, anymore. You look up. It’s a black... umbrella? Spinning around, you come face to face with a suit. An extremely familiar one.

“M-mr. jeon?” He’s holding the umbrella and staring at you, but it feels like he’s looking into your soul. 

You blink, eyes flicking down to the wet ground. It’s silent until he speaks up. “Why did you suddenly come here? Y/n?” 

You slowly turn back to look at the plaque. “This is where my dad is,” you softly say. There’s a pause before wonwoo responds, “I’m so sorry.” 

You laugh, shaking your head. “You don’t have to be sorry. This is why I blew up last Friday. I was supposed to be here that day.” You feel wonwoo tense next to you. 

Before he can say anything, you face him. “It still doesn’t excuse my behavior. But.. why did you follow me?” He fumbles a bit before replying, “it was raining.. it wouldn’t be safe for you to go alone.” 

You laugh, a pleasant sound ringing in wonwoo’s ears before saying, “thank you. And, I came here because of my family. You might not have known this, but I got this job to help them. After my father died, my mother became depressed and my siblings couldn’t do anything. So I had to get a job to support them.” 

You bitterly smile before continuing, “I’m not even close with them. I was too busy working, and my mother was too busy moping. My siblings are busy with school, and I never see them anymore. It’s gotten to the point where I just pay their bills and don’t even speak to them. Ha, they finally contacted me to say they were gonna visit him today, can you believe it? And I missed them. As usual.” 

Wonwoo looks down at his feet. “I never knew that about you... You’ve been working for me for years, and I didn’t know that.” 

You shift. “What about you?” He turns to you, surprised. “Me?” You nod, “your family?” Wonwoo shuffles closer to you, causing you to unconsciously swallow. 

“Well, I’m not very close with my family either. It was all work, preparing me to take over the business. I mostly grew up alone... and I didn’t really have many close relationships. Uh- well, you can most likely tell. Everyone in the office probably can too.” 

You glance at him. He’s going back into his shell. The one he would always go into when he was stressed, scared, alone. You hesitate. “That’s okay, you don’t have to be close to everyone. It doesn’t hurt to be a little kinder, though. Not to be rude, but a lot of people in the office are.... a bit scared of you? To be honest, we were all a bit shocked when you started caring more. I was surprised. Um- but i-in a good way.” 

Wonwoo stares at you with wide eyes as you focus back on the stone. A comfortable silence fills the air between the two of you. Standing there, hearing the sound of the pouring drops. 

As the rain falls harder, you feel as if you have too.

❋

There’s an understanding, a deeper one between you and wonwoo after that day. You feel like you know him, even if it’s only a little more. 

The CEO suddenly turns into a completely different person. To others, he may still seem like a cold boss, but to you, wonwoo’s an endearing introvert who’s obsessed with cats. 

You were shocked, to say the least when wonwoo comes by your desk and shoves a phone in your face. You flinch before opening your eyes and staring at the screen.  “Mr. Jeon..... why are you showing me a picture of a cat?” 

“It’s cute. Isn’t it?” Laughing, you cover your mouth to hide a smile. “Yes sir, it sure is.” 

He continues to show more of himself, and you find yourself falling deeper. For someone who you never expected.  He has such a cold exterior to people around you, but once it’s just you two, he turns into such a softie. 

Seungkwan confronts you one day. “Y/n, you have to explain. What is happening between you and CEO jeon??” You shake your head in response, but you feel heat creep up your neck. 

“Seungkwannn, I told you already. He just helped me out, and I guess, I understand him a bit better now. He’s not bad, seriously.” 

He lets out a small tch! “A week ago you were complaining about his nasty personality, and now you’re saying he’s not bad?”

You whine, clinging to his side. “Ahh, seriously I said it was nothing. Why won’t you believe me??” Someone clears their throat. 

You and seungkwan turn. It’s wonwoo who else would it be. Immediately, seungkwan bows. “Sir!!” Wonwoo stands there, face passive. “Secretary y/n, come to my office.” 

Seungkwan shoots you a look, leaving you to shrug and follow the CEO.

He offers you a seat, and you sit on the plush couch, waiting.

He shifts in his seat awkwardly, and you raise an eyebrow. “Why did you call me in, Mr. Jeon?” 

He coughs before muttering, “are you close with him? Mr. Boo?” “You mean seungkwan? Oh, he’s my friend, that’s all. Why do you want to know? Are you jealous?” you tease.

But wonwoo only scratches his head. You’re about to apologize for going too far with the joke, but you can’t even respond after what he says. “Well, of course, I am. Cause I’m interested in you.” 

Your mouth drops open. “What did you just say?” He looks at you, a serious expression on his face. “I want to go out with you. Truly.” 

Heart beating faster, you internally panic. He just asked you out? He’s interested in you? What is going on? 

“So? What’s your answer?” You snap out of it, glancing back at your boss, nervously shaking his leg. I mean, you enjoyed his presence. But he was your boss, the supposed cold and scary Jeon Wonwoo.. and also the one who still managed to infiltrate your mind.

“Um, yes. I will go out with you.”

❋

You find out and learn more and more sides to him. They all cause your heart to flutter harder and harder. He’s no longer just your boss, he’s someone you can trust, confide in. 

You begged wonwoo not to tell anyone. All the dates happening in secret. Wonwoo was upset, originally. He wanted to tell people, to show you were his, but you firmly insisted on keeping it quiet. If people in the office found out, you would never hear the end of it. 

You walk into wonwoo’s office one morning, carrying the itinerary for the week. Once he sees you, his eyes light up. He walks over to you, grabbing the file and throwing it on the desk somewhere. 

You stare at him with wide eyes as he strides over to you, wrapping his arms around your body. There’s a second of peace and content, but you interrupt him, tensing and saying, “wonwoo- someone might see us.” 

Even as you continue to shift and glance around to check, he sighs and rests his head on top of yours. “Secretary, can’t you just relax for a second? We’ve been working so much, we need a break.” 

Letting out a huff, you allow yourself to melt into his embrace. “Two more minutes,” you mumble. Wonwoo leans down, so his face is inches from yours, a small grin displayed. You smile back, knowing what he wants. 

You lean in, placing your lips on his. His mouth moves hungrily on yours, causing you to make a small sound of surprise. 

Then there’s suddenly a knock, and you hear the door open. “CEO Jeon?” 

You fly under his desk, squeezing your eyes shut and praying whoever it was didn't see you.

You wait there, attempting to muffle your breathing and keep still. You recognize the voice, it’s Mr. Choi Seungcheol. Vice President of the company. Why did he have to come at the worst time? 

You hear the distinct sounds of their conversation for what seems to be forever before Mr. Choi finally bids him goodbye. Your body slumps in relief, waiting to get out from under his desk until you hear seungcheol suddenly speak again. 

“Also, why is secretary y/l/n under your desk? I see their feet sticking out.” You silently curse yourself. Slowly and very ungracefully, you maneuver your way from under the desk. Standing up, you quickly smooth your clothes and hair. “Oh, ha, Mr. Choi. I had no idea you here. Um- well, you see...” 

You quickly look at Wonwoo and back to Mr. Choi. Stammering, you finally say, “Mr. Jeon thought he saw a coach roach and called me in. Must’ve just imagined it.” You nervously laugh as wonwoo sheepishly nods in agreement. 

Finally, he leaves the two of you, and you sit on the couch, biting your lip as you examine wonwoo’s expression. 

“Was the coach roach your best excuse?”

You cringe. “I’m sorry-! I couldn’t think of anything else. Do you think he saw?” 

Wonwoo shrugs, sitting next to you. “Is it so bad for him to see?” he speaks quietly.

You face him, aghast. “No! It’s just, you know how it is... if everyone knew. They’d misunderstand, think I’m using you or something.” 

Your body freezes as you turn to face him. “Wait- you don’t think I’m using you... right?” 

Wonwoo quickly shakes his head. “No, I know you y/n. You would never do that. I’m just afraid. That you’ll leave me because I’m too quiet, or too busy with work or-..” 

You smile at him softly.

“You know I love you?” He stares at you, shocked. You had never said it to each other before, but you truly meant it. 

Reaching for his hand, you intertwine it with yours. “Did you know I thought about quitting my job before? When we were debuting the showcase. It was so stressful that I really was gonna leave.” You feel his hand grip yours tighter, so you continue.

“But you know I'll never leave you, right? I won’t ever leave you alone.” Nudging him, you add playfully, “that means you’re stuck with me forever.” 

Wonwoo laughs- a short deep sound. 

“I’m okay with that, cause I’m in love with you too.” 

 author note: i actually wanted to write more but got lazy...  im conflicted if i should add to the story or leave it as it is :\\\\ 

[katnissmellarkkk]

General #7

Hiiii! Okay, well I bet you thought I forgot about this! Or, more than likely, you forgot you even requested this back in Decemeber. But never fear, my child. I remembered and have been thinking of this fic and what to write for months. 

And so I’m so sorry, I’m a total perfectionist and I started and discared like 3 ideas for this before deciding on this oneshot sooo if this sucks, I’m at least comforted by the fact that I accomplished something in writing this itself? That sentence made zero sense but... I’m tired 🤷🏼‍♀️😅.

Prompt : General # 7 :

“Is that blood?” 

“Yes but that doesn’t matter right now, what does matter is-” 

“You are literally bleeding.”

Anyways, thank you for the prompt and here we go! 

Whispers Of Light

I don't know exactly how I got roped into this. How exactly Delly Cartwright, Peeta's best friend—and alright, my friend now too—managed to convince me to help her and Leevy and about three dozen other members of the community with sorting boxes.

Sorting boxes. Organizing contents. Decorating with "found treasures".

The type of activities Prim loved doing with our mother. The type of activities I refused to do after my father died, to punish my mother for her depression.

The type of activities I now kick myself for walking out on, that I'll never be able to take back. I'll never be able to get those moments back with my sister. I'll never know what those hours between her and our mother entailed, because I chose to exclude myself, just so I could hold onto my petty anger for something that was out of all our control.

Maybe that's why I agreed to help Delly and the others with sorting through boxes upon boxes of debrief, of the items that scarcely survived Twelve's bombing almost two years ago. Maybe I only agreed out of guilt, both for never doing this type of endeavor with my sister and for being the direct cause of the bombing itself.

But whatever my reasons were, I agreed to help nonetheless, and I always follow through my promises. If there was one part of me forged in the war, if only one minor aspect of me was amplified in the smoke and haze and blood of revolution, it was the importance of keeping your promises, against all odds.

The dire consequences of a broken promise has long lasting aftereffects, beyond anything either Haymitch or I wish to dwell on.

"Katniss!" Delly calls, holding up an old, half-ripped paper book that is completely void of a front cover. "Look! I think this book is from the old Apothecary Shop!"

I squint at the dusty, decimated item, not entirely convinced. "I don't think so?" I murmur, unable to even decipher the words on the now melted, conjoined pages. "I'm pretty sure my mother kept the only apothecary book in her family?"

Kanon Bagley turns to inspect the battered item in his girlfriend's hands as well. "I don't think this is a medicinal plant book, Dells," he says sheepishly, a small smirk playing on his lips.

She gives him an incredulous look. "What do you mean medicinal?"

I peer up at him too, not comprehending his meaning any more than Delly. "What kind of plants do you think are in here?" I ask, taking the nearly destroyed object myself and flipping through the worn pages again, seeing odd herbs that neither of my parents ever mentioned or had on hand. "These don't look like the poisonous ones my father told me about?"

Kanon bites back a laugh now and I can't help feeling a little perturbed. As kind and soft-spoken as he usually is, I'm foreign to the feeling of him laughing at me. "What?" Delly snaps at him before I even can.

He still chuckles though, in spite of both our nasty glares. "You guys, it's a book of plants that'll get you high."

It takes a full minute for the meaning to dawn on me. Long enough that Leevy and a couple guys I used to go to school with come over to inspect the book as well. Long enough that they confirm Kanon's assessment just as I realize we're talking about plants that'll make you feel akin to how the morphling made me feel while confined for I killing Coin.

While everyone else snickers—and Delly full on chortles—I pass the book back to Kanon, sliding out of the crowd and moving towards a brand new box of savaged items.

It's not that the mention of plant-based drugs is a trigger for me. It's not something I ever truly gave any thought to before, to be honest. My father likely knew of them but it's not like he was about to bestow that kind of knowledge on his eleven-year-old and my mother perhaps felt it was inappropriate to mention.

No, it wasn't the subject in itself that hit a sore spot for me. But like so many times before, it's where the subject led my mind. It's where the topic took me back to.

Snow's Execution Day. The day I chose to kill President Coin instead. Being thrown back into my old tribute room. Getting high on the morphling.

Trying to forget all that I'd lost. Trying to forget my little sister becoming a human torch before my very eyes. My district engulfed in flames. The ambiguous loss of my best friend.

The connection between me and Peeta that I believed then would be permanently severed. That I believed then to be irreparable.

I suppose I believed then I was irreparable too.

And I miss Peeta suddenly, even more than I already did. Because he always knows what to say when my thoughts turn dark, when I'm suddenly triggered out of the happy, every day events and suctioned backwards to a war torn bird with her wings clipped.

But he's not here to talk me down or scare away the ghosts haunting my mind. He's not here to comfort me or even shoot me a supportive glance. No, he's at his very busy business today.

Peeta's bakery—the Mellark Bakery—has only proven to withstand the test of time these past few months. Since someone accidentally burned down the place, with nothing more than a croissant and a fancy Capitol toaster, the rebuilt bakery has been nothing but a success.

And also extremely time-consuming, I grumble internally, as I begin to pull out stuffed toys that once belonged to dead children.

"If any of those are still intact, we can donate them to the community home," Leaf John says as he opens the box across from me.

"And what exactly are we supposed to be use as decorations from these boxes?" I murmur, peering into another cardboard container, full of half-charred papers and cloths.

The general idea of today, as Delly had pitched it to me last week, was to help the community of Twelve finally sort through these boxes, donate what we could to those in need and decorate the new Justice Building with the leftover contents inside.

Somehow though I can't imagine pinning up terrible drawings of plants that'll inebriate you or headless teddy bears is going to bode well with the district.

Delly rolls her eyes in my direction—a whole new kind of response that I never thought I'd be receiving from the girl who skipped through the town square until she was fourteen years old—before nodding towards boxes on top of the ladder. "We're decorating the Justice Building with the surviving photos from those boxes, Katniss."

"Oh." Then why am I sorting these grimy, dirt-covered playthings? Why didn't anyone give me more clear instructions on today?

And why has it taken almost two years for Twelve to get a group of people together to organize the surviving items from the bombing?

I have no idea how Peeta's managed to get two bakeries built in the time it's taken for thirty-eight of us to come to the Justice Building and look through fifty cardboard boxes. And if I'm being honest, I have no idea why I'm even still here helping. I'm clearly not contributing much to the event. There's definitely more than enough volunteers without me.

And, of course, I could be at the bakery right now. Without a doubt, I'd be of more service there than I am here, digging through dusty knickknacks. I could be helping Peeta and Thom and the other part-time employees, exerting more knowledge and authority than I have here.

After all, Peeta did say the bakery was partially mine. In his mind, at least.

The ulterior motive of getting small, fleeting moments with my boyfriend, of basking in the feeling of safety with him beside me, of the occasional stolen kiss or hand squeeze when no one is looking, runs through the back of my mind.

And sways my decision immensely.

I open my mouth to tell Delly and the others that I'm about to head out, that they clearly have it covered here and I'm just in the way, when at the worst possible second, Leevy kindly murmurs, "Katniss, do you mind starting on the box on the ladder? Seeing if any of the pictures are in decent enough shape?"

I hesitate for a long moment, realizing immediately my predicament. It'd be rude to leave right after someone just essentially assigned me a task. I did agree to be here today, to help out with this tedious project. Leaving right now would only come off as rude and inconsiderate.

This is the reason I never did enjoy group assignments in school. The longer I'm here, the more I'm rediscovering this fact about myself. The division of the workload, the bore of the standing around, not knowing if you're doing the right or wrong thing, the lack of total control.

But I still nod after waiting a beat too long and agree with the nicest flare in my tone I can manage.

I'll go through the one box at the top of the ladder and then subtly make my exit afterwards. The image I unintentionally conjured up of Peeta and the bakery is still pulling at me, making me anxious to get back to him, to see him again even though we were together only three hours ago.

Since we officially became a couple a few months back—though Haymitch scoffs at that notion, claiming we've been together since Peeta first started sleeping over in my bed—I've found myself growing far more clingy to him than I ever could have anticipated. I hate when he leaves for the bakery in the mornings now, even as I still revel in the solace I find inside the woods. I look forward to his return home every night. More than even look forward to it, I'm usually at the bakery around the closing hours, helping him clean and inventory, asking him when he's coming home. Maybe looking somewhat unconsciously flirtatious as I say it.

I grab the box sitting on the ladder's top stair and pull it open, easily maintaining my balance one rung down, the same way I maintain my balance on a tree branch while hunting.

Inside pours out a plethora of photographs, mostly of Twelve's now past citizens. Near the top of the pile I see images of Greasy Sae's daughter, Dolly. The mother of her granddaughter. The daughter who died of croup a few years before the war.

Those photos must belong to Sae, I realize. Which means more of her items are probably scattered throughout the boxes here. And despite the fact that I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she'll tell me not of be impractical, that if she's made it two years without these things she doesn't need them now, I still make a mental note to return her lost items. If nothing else, I make a mental promise to give back to her the photos of her daughter.

I know better than anyone what kind of comfort photographs of the deceased can provide.

As if in line with my thoughts, as if I alone manifested it somehow, the next image that catches my eye is one I entirely do not anticipate.

It's a shiny photo, on the kind of glossy paper my family could never afford. In the image is a blonde man with broad shoulders and a tall build. Wrapped in his embrace stands a petite girl, with long blonde curls and mascara accentuating her already long lashes. The couple both have eyes that match the color of the sky and are dressed up in some of the nicest clothes in all of Twelve. A white dress with lace. A gray suit with a black vest. The pretty girl wears jewelry and lipstick and there's a familiar glint in the male's eyes and I find myself mesmerized.

And I can't pretend I don't see my boyfriend in both of their faces. I can't pretend Peeta isn't the spitting image of both his parents.

He has his mother's smile, I realize with startling assurance. I never saw the witch smile personally, at any point in my life so I suppose I wouldn't know where he got his charming, sweet grin from.

The mannerism looks so out of place on his mother. The kind smile Peeta has, the one that could light up a blackened sky, doesn't bode with the woman in the picture, even on her wedding day. The charming smile doesn't fit with what I know of the woman's character. With what little about her Peeta chooses to share.

But I'm even more surprised to find how much Peeta has come to resemble his father. How much Peeta has grown to favor the now deceased man.

The last time I saw the baker—the original baker, that is. Haidon Mellark—before the Quarter Quell, I resented the fact that Peeta wasn't as tall or as broad as his father. I privately believed if he'd inherited those traits, he'd be even more likely to win the games again and I could worry about him less.

Peeta was always taller than me and was always remarkably strong, after working in the bakery since childhood. But his father was a whole different level. Haidon Mellark, I'd forgotten until now, had a body that could only rival my own father's.

And as it turns out, Peeta did inherit Haidon's physicality. He just also happened to be a late bloomer. Like his mother, I imagine, staring at her tiny frame in the picture.

The change in Peeta's form occurred so gradually I barely even noticed until a couple months ago, when I woke up with my head against his heart and abruptly realized just how broad he had become. Until I couldn't even reach to kiss his jaw on my tip toe. Until he started laughing at me and had to lift me up in order to properly embrace the way I like.

"Katniss?" I hear Delly beckon, trying to bring me back to reality. Trying and failing, that is. I hear her but only in a vague, distant sense. My mind is still stuck on the image in my grasp. Still stuck on the novelty that I managed to find a remembrance for the boy who still at times questions if his memory is full of lies.

"I still cry about my family and somedays I can't even remember their faces."

I never even considered the possibility of finding a token of Peeta's departed family here. It never occurred to me, the potential finds in this box at my fingertips, that I could take home to my boyfriend. I never imagined finding him something to hold onto when the inevitable dark day came again like a storm cloud, full of thunder.

I'm so entranced what this could mean for Peeta, so lost in my own little world, that I'm barely even hanging onto the ladder. I'm definitely not as steady as I should be, standing near the top rung.

And I'm definitely not steady enough to hang on when Delly gives it a rough shake, trying to catch my attention.

/

The boxes break my fall. Sort of. Kanon and Leaf John had taken the liberty of placing the empty cardboard, already looked through and emptied, beneath the ladder.

Falling headfirst into a large, void box is better than falling plainly onto the filthy, concrete tile floor. But not ideal. Not as helpful as falling into a box of surviving clothes or toys would have been.

Delly apologized profusely for shaking the ladder. She'd even begun to cry when she noticed the blood seeping from my forehead.

Thankfully Kanon was there, as I didn't have the energy to console her much. I don't even know how I managed to cut my head at all, but it stung a fair amount and it provided me the excuse I wanted minutes prior, to escape the group project and head for the bakery.

Even after the fall, my mind still was cemented on the newfound treasure. My first instinct was still to show this memento to Peeta as soon as possible.

Kanon though, like a good friend, insisted on walking me home, despite my many protests that it was unnecessary, that I was just fine, that I could walk home blind if I had to. He insisted, foiling my intention to walk directly to the bakery and not wait for Peeta's return home, which still remained hours away.

Kanon was surprisingly stubborn when he felt strongly about something and I chose to relent, to give in and allow him to accompany me back to what used to be Victor's Village—where he now resided with Delly, inside Peeta's old home—without much fight.

Fighting for your independence and autonomy doesn't exactly present you as rational when there's a bloody gash in your forehead.

"Doesn't that hurt?" Kanon asks as we make out way up my porch.

I look up, maybe a little startled, from Mr. and Mrs. Mellark's wedding photo. "My head?"

"Yeah," he says carefully, looking at the blood like it's a mutt in an arena.

I shrug, doing my best not to indicate how dizzy I actually feel. Either from the fall or the blood still dripping out despite my attempt to plug the wound up with old cotton rags someone sorted into the trash box. "I've had worse."

He chuckles, a little sardonically. "Yeah, so have I."

I thank him for walking me home—for it was as inconvenient as it was sweet—and close the door slowly behind me, before leaning my ear against the wooden frame, waiting. Waiting for him to climb the steps down from my porch and make his way back to the Justice Building. Waiting for him to be far enough out of sight that I can sneak back out without him also trying to accompany me to the bakery.

It's not that I don't appreciate Kanon and Delly and all of my other friends' concerns. It's the fact that I wish to bestow a likely loaded item upon my boyfriend and I really don't need an audience to do it.

It's not the easiest feat, to slyly time it so Kanon won't hear me opening and shutting my front door again. And it's probably not my smartest plan, to walk alone along the rocky cobblestones and the uneven concrete, with a less than level head and body.

But I make it to the back door of the bakery still, just as I knew I would. It takes three times as long, but I make it there nonetheless.

Still clutching the photograph of his parents between my fingers too. Still with the same primary focus on my mind. To give him a token of remembrance, a token of the imperfect family he lost so tragically, that he still greatly missed, even when he can't say their names. Even when he can't conjure up their faces.

"You don't remember your family?"

"Sometimes I do... I'm not so sure other days. My memory isn't exactly top notch, if you know what I mean."

I push open the heavy-weighted back door, using all the energy my body can muster up. To my relief, Thom is already in the back room, sweeping flour off the floor.

"Hi, boss," he greets slyly as I walk in, barely glancing up at me. I shoot him an over-the-top eye roll, though I can't help smirking myself at the stupid nickname, when he beckons Peeta. "Hey, your girl is here!" He yells loudly. Too loudly to be packed with customers at the counter.

I take that to mean the daily rush has come and gone. Which would be very convenient, as it means I can present Peeta with my finding that much faster, without having to worry about his business—or our business, as he teasingly calls it—being held up.

I hear the sound of my boyfriend's quiet laughter from the front. The sound that I akin to my father's singing or my sister's squeal of delight. The last sound still alive that can make my heart do a flip.

But it dies out the second he peaks his blonde head into the back room. The moment his baby blues, the same color as both his parents', meet my silver ones and then trail upwards.

Almost as if remembering the gash in my head, I reach to my forehead, to ensure the makeshift cloth bandage is still in place.

"Katniss?" Peeta says, his eyes looking far more nervous than I anticipated. Which I can only take to mean the red liquid has seeped through the plain fabric. "Is that blood?"

I don't want him to focus too heavily on that fact though. Like I told Kanon, I've had much worse injuries in my life. Me and Peeta both have.

Just look at his prosthetic leg.

"Yes," I reply easily, before moving closer to him, pushing the glossy photograph towards him. "But that doesn't matter right now. What does matter is-"

"You are literally bleeding."

I sigh, feeling slightly perturbed now. "Peeta, look," I insist, thrusting the image of his parents towards him, waiting for it to take anchor.

And it does. It takes a beat longer than I expect, but it happens nonetheless. I watch silently as the image captives him, as the shiny photograph takes him back to a time when this exact location was the only home he'd ever known and this business was run by the two people inside the picture.

He touches the photo, as if to test it's realism, before looking up at me in disbelief. "Where did you find this?"

"The Justice Building today. Inside the boxes, with all the things lost in the bombing."

There's a long pause as Peeta process this. The silence makes me antsy, finding myself abruptly uncertain of what could be going through his mind.

Finally, he whispers softly, "I never thought I'd see this picture again."

And the awed, tender smile that spreads across his face swiftly encompasses me in its warmth.

And I suddenly don't even feel the gash in my head anymore.

/

Read The Rest On AO3

[orionares]

BTHB: Comatose

BTHB: Comatose 

Law and Order: SVU

@badthingshappenbingo​

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Can I ask you something?”

He flinches at the small voice from across the room. Blue eyes similar to his eyes stare at him blankly beneath brown curly hair with the same tenacity and strength he'd worked side by side with for twelve years. 

Elliot nods slowly, prompting the ten year old to slide out of his chair and cross the room to stop inches from the foot of his mother's bed. Noah Benson rests his hand on the foot of the bed and eyes Elliot cautiously. "Did you do something to my mom?"

Elliot chokes on his breath and pushes himself from the huddled position in his chair to face Noah. He stifles a need to burst into tears and instead answers in a cracked voice, “What do you mean?”

“If you were the one that got her hurt,” Noah muses, “you’d be in jail. But- but you aren’t arrested and you have a badge. So you're a cop. Right?”

Elliot can feel his heart shatter as the boy eyes his mother, lying unconscious in one of Sanai’s hospital beds, hooked up to a handful of wires. He himself can’t bring himself to look at her- no, not after what had happened. The guilt alone-

“Do you work with my mom?” Noah’s question comes as he steps closer to Elliot, causing the older man to flinch. “I’ve never seen or heard about you before.”

“You're inquisitive,” Elliot stammers. Noah cocks his head to right and mutters, “What’s itiquative?”

“Inquisitive,” Elliot corrects. He scratches the back of his neck and sighs, “It means you ask a lot of questions. You also like to ask the right questions. Like your mom.”

“That’s what Uncle Fin says.” His face falls as he turns towards the bed and sniffles, “Is she going to be ok?” 

A knuckle raps on the door as Fin Tutola ducks his head into the door before stepping in. He pauses to stare at Olivia for a moment before shaking his head in disbelief. Even though he had dropped off Noah an hour earlier, he still finds himself shaken at seeing her in this state. “You ready to head out, Noah?”

Noah doesn’t peel his eyes from the bed. “Why hasn’t she woken up yet?” he answers softly. Behind him, Fin and Elliot exchange a worried look. 

“Do you remember what we talked about yesterday?” Fin asks. He walks to the side of the bed opposite Elliot and Noah. He places a hand on Olivia’s forehead and sighs as one of his closest friends doesn’t react to his touch. Noah nods slowly and furrows his brow as he recalls the day prior’s conversation. 

“She hit her head on the sidewalk when she and-” Noah quickly whips his head back to Elliot, “Detective Stabler was trying to leave the hospital. It’s a….it’s called a…”

“Cerebral edema,” Elliot finishes. “Brain swelling. They induced a coma to help the swelling go down. It’s going to take a few days for her to heal, buddy.” Using the word ‘buddy’ stings for Elliot- hell, he doesn’t deserve to use that term for the son of the woman whose heart he broke. 

 Noah shakes his head. “Oh, yeah. Can I stay a little longer? ‘Cause I want to be here when she wakes up.” 

“Well, Elliot will be here-”

Noah’s eyes widen and he turns once more to Elliot. He mirrors his mother’s investigative scan at his badge and face. “My mom says your name in her sleep. A lot.” 

Fin snorts unexpectedly at the boy’s comment. “Okay. Maybe this is a conversation for another time-”

 Elliot finally pulls himself out of his daze and holds up a hand in defense. “No, I-I can head out and-”

“You didn’t answer my question,” Noah counters. “Can I talk to Elliot, Uncle Fin?”

Elliot glances up to Fin, who’s staring at Noah with contemplation. Even after ten years, Elliot can recognize the planning in the sergeant’s eyes. After a minute, Fin looks down to Olivia and whispers to her, “It’s your kid and you know I can’t say that to that face. He’s going to ask a million questions unless we nip it in the butt.” 

“Fin-”

“Why don’t you take Noah down to the cafeteria?” Fin suggests, cutting Elliot off. He checks his cellphone to see 7:36 on the lock screen. “I think the cafeteria closes by 8 and he hasn’t had dinner yet.” 

“Wait, maybe-” 

Noah’s already moving towards the head of the bed where an empty chair sits close enough for him to climb onto the bed. He sits on his knees and begins chatting to his mother, “Mom, I’m going to be right back, ok?” 

“She heard you,” Fin says. “I’ll keep an eye on her.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the cafeteria, Noah slides into one of the cafeteria’s booths with a plate of a hotdog and French fries. Elliot stands next to the table and watches the boy slide off his jacket and begin eating hungrily without a word. The detective hesitates before easing down into the booth and sliding across to sit directly across from him. 

“How’s the food?” Elliot finally asks after a few minutes of silence. 

“Good.” 

“I’m glad.” Elliot rests his hands in his lap and asks, “So your question about if I did something to your mom….what made you think that?”

“I heard Auntie Amanda and Uncle Sonny talking about you when I stayed at Auntie Amanda’s apartment,” Noah answers. He takes a bite of his hot dog and continues, “They were talking about how her ex-partner came back and how someone….named Chief said that she should stay away from you. What’d you do?”

“I- '' Elliot inhales and exhales slowly, replaying the many ways he had predicted having a conversation with Olivia’s son. “I was her partner at work for twelve years. We were inseparable and then I left her….without saying goodbye.” 

“Why?”

Elliot pauses to formulate his answer. “Adult reasons.”

Noah moves onto his French fries and mumbles, “Adults always say that. It’s dumb.”

“Touché. I was married until a couple of months ago when my wife died,” Elliot explains. Saying the words ‘my wife died’ still stings. “When your mom and I were partners, I…..um…”

“You loved my mom?” Noah’s eyes widen before he shrugs his shoulders at Elliot’s sudden look of disbelief. “What? It happens in the movies all the time.”

“You are too smart for your own good,” Elliot chuckles. “I did but I was married. That’s a complicated line even for adults.”

“Then….why’d you leave?” 

“Because I was afraid. Things became complicated so I did what cowards do and ran, Noah.” He ignores the instinct to stop spilling his guts to a ten year old and pushes on. “ My family and I moved to Italy and I cut her out of my life.” 

Noah suddenly stops eating, pushes the plate towards Elliot and scowls at the man. “That’s stupid.”

“What?”

“I don’t get why adults do stupid stuff like that. My friend Phillip’s parents hated each other but they stayed married. Philip said they should have gotten a divorce  a long time ago but didn’t. He moved away last year with his grandparents,  I think. It’s dumb that you left.” 

Elliot settles back against the booth, speechless. The observations and opinions shared by everyone in Olivia’s life spilled out by her son in a ten minute conversation. “It was and will be one of the greatest regrets in my life.” 

Noah takes another fry off of his plate. His next question comes in a timid voice. “Do you still love my mom?”

Elliot swallows hard and feels tears forming in his eyes. “Why do you ask?” he chokes out. 

“Because you keep staying with her at the hospital. And you look like people do when people they love are hurt.” 

Elliot nods and chuckles. “You should be a detective when you grow up.”

“I want to be a dancer. Do you?”

Elliot smiles for the first time in days at Noah. “More than anything. More than anything.”

Noah takes another fry before stifling a yawn. “You should tell her...if she...if she…”

“Hey,” Elliot quickly slides out of his side of the boot and moves to sit next to a suddenly tear eyed Noah. Elliot rests a hand on his shoulder and says softly, “Your mom is the absolute strongest woman I ‘ve ever met. She’s going to be ok. You can’t give up hope, okay?”

Noah buries his head against Elliot’s shoulder and whimpers, “Okay.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"They're letting me stay the night," Elliot says softly as he settles back into his chair he had been sitting in for the past two days. After parting ways with Fin and Noah, he had returned to the hospital room to find a blanket , a pillow and a nurse giving a nod in approval. "I think they assume that we've..that we're…together, I guess."

Hw can't bring himself to look at her battered form in the bed. The moments of leaving the hospital after the Chief and IAB had dismissed Bell, Olivia and him to go home replays over and over every time his mind wanders.

"Elliot, I don't need protection!" Olivia growls as the three head towards the parking garage. 

"Wheatley got to Angela in a hospital! I'm not going to let him get near you!" Elliot counters. Behind him, Bell's eyes are occupied on her phone, brow furrowed at the information she's just received from Jet. 

“I know how to protect myself and my son. I’m a police captain,” she argues back. There’s an anger behind her statement that he can’t quite place but-

Bell suddenly holds up a hand and exclaims, “Hold up! Jet’s just sent me a-”

His sergeant doesn't finish as a concussive force slams into his body , propelling him and the two women across the pavement and into unconsciousness. 

Elliot shakes off the memory and continues to talk. “I think it’s because I’ve spent a total of six hours away from you since the explosion. Liv, I can’t- ever since I’ve come back, I’ve put you in danger, caused you stress and….got Kathy killed.”

In the back of his head, he imagines the Olivia of ten years ago, sitting next to him with a cup of coffee and a comforting hand on his shoulder, saying, “El, you can’t blame yourself for something that was out of your control.”

“But I left you and that was in my control,” he answers the voice. He rubs a hand over his face in frustration. Another bit of memory- the briefest moment of consciousness after the explosion replays in his head. 

He’ll never forget opening his eyes to her lying unconscious a foot away from him on the pavement with blood running from her ear onto the ground. 

“I know I don’t deserve this but,” Elliot whispers, “but don’t leave me please. I didn’t deserve Kathy and I sure as hell don’t deserve you….but” he finally looks up to the bed and can’t stop the sob of guilt that comes. The tubes, cuts and her stillness break him. Elliot stands up and walks to her side, letting the tears fall. The tears don’t fall only for her, but for his wife, his kids, Noah and everyone he’s impacted since returning to New York. 

“I love you,” Elliot whispers. He rests his forehead against hers and repeats the words he hopes he can say one day again. “I love you.”

[fanmoose12]

Partners

Characters: Petra Ral, Levi, Hanji Zoe x Levi Genre: Action / Mystery / Romance Rating: T

Detective!au

Summary: when Petra was promoted to a detective and partnered up with legendary Levi Ackerman, she felt like the happiest person in the world.

But, as she soon found out, detective Ackerman she used to admire so much was actually a far cry from the ideal policeman Petra thought he was. He was rude, harsh and easily annoyed. And, in addition, he still hadn’t moved on from the death of his previous partner - detective Hange Zoe.

Chapter 10/?

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Сhapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Сhapter 7

Сhapter 8

Chapter 9

“We’ve been apart for so long!” Hange kissed the crown of black hair, nuzzling her nose into it. “I’ve missed you so much, my dear! I love you more than anyone else in this world, yes, yes, I do.”

“Are you finished already?” Levi asked, scowling darkly. “Or are you going to continue making out with my dog?”

“I’m just saying hello to my favorite boy!” Hange giggled, and Grim licked her face happily. “Well, my second favorite boy,” she corrected, shooting Levi a mischievous grin.

“Get the fuck off the floor, four-eyes,” he lightly kicked her thigh. “Before your butt freezes.”

“Fine, fine, Grim, get off me, boy,” the dog complied instantly, and Hange outstretched her hand, signaling Levi that she needed help with getting up. Levi rolled his eyes, but obeyed too. Hange stood up, dusting her pants. “A certain someone likes my butt so much, he doesn’t want it to freeze.”

“Take your shoes off,” Levi grunted, way above responding to Hange’s taunts. Whatever he thought about her butt wasn’t any of her business anyway.

“Ah, this place hasn’t changed a bit!” Hange exclaimed, as she walked further into Levi’s apartment.

“What did you expect?” Levi followed after her. “Some big renovations?”

“Maybe?” Hange shrugged. “I was actually worried some cutie lives here now.”

Levi stared at the back of her head, lost and confused. She was worried? About some cutie?

What the fuck?

“You know,” Hange continued. “Some adorable little thing who managed to steal the heart of Levi Ackerman himself.”

“Nothing of the sort happened, as you can see,” he said, his face blank despite his obvious discomfiture.  

Adorable little thing stealing his heart? What a bunch of nonsense, Levi thought. Even if there was someone, capable of stealing his heart, it would be a loud, messy idiot who stood a good few inches above him.

“You don’t need a tour around the house, I hope?” he asked.

“Of course not, I remember it better than my own.”

“Good, then settle down, I’ll go on a walk with Grim.”

“Aw, you’re taking him away from me already?” Hange pouted, crouching in front of the dog. Grim licked her pout away, making Hange giggle. And eliciting an annoyed tsk from his owner.

“Let’s go,” he fastened a leash to Grim’s collar. He then looked back at Hange. “Try not to ruin my house while I’m gone, alright?”

“Sure!” she showed him thumb-ups.

Levi shook his head with an exasperated sigh. “I won’t be gone for too long. Oh, and Hange,” he glanced at her briefly, before turning away. “Welcome home.”

 ***

“Um, Levi?” Hange called seconds after he returned from his walk with Grim. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure,” he gave Grim a treat and motioned for him to stay put, walking towards the bedroom, from where Hange’s voice was coming from.

Levi walked in and saw that Hange was standing in front of his wardrobe.

Oh. She wanted to ask him about that.

Understandable.

“I know how that it looks kinda creepy…” he rubbed his forehead, feeling more than a little bit embarrassed.

“That’s my old clothes, right?”

Well, there was no pointing in denying that.

“Yes,” Levi said, giving Hange a courtesy of looking her straight in the eyes. “I was the one, who cleaned your apartment after, well, you know…”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, throwing them away seemed like a waste, so…”

“Thanks!” Hange beamed.

Levi frowned. “You’re not… mad or something?”

“Of course, not, silly! I’m actually quite happy. I’ve missed this pullover so much!” Hange took the piece of clothing out, throwing it at Levi’s bed. “And this sweater!” it followed the path of a pullover. “And this shirt! And—”

“Okay, stop.” Levi grabbed her hand, preventing Hange from making a total mess on his bed. “I’ve got it, you don’t mind me being a weirdo, my bed has nothing to do with it.”

“Oh right,” Hange chuckled, shrugging helplessly. “Sorry about that. I can—”

“I’ll clean this out,” Levi cut her off. “You go ahead and take a shower.”

That put a pout on Hange’s face. “But I’ve already had one this morning…”

That was an improvement, Levi was actually impressed. Still, it wasn’t enough.

“I’m not letting you sleep in my bed until I make sure that you’re fresh and clean, four-eyes.”

“What!” Hange squealed. “You want me to sleep in your bed?”

“Do you wish to spend the night at my shitty old sofa? With Grim drooling all over you?” Levi bluntly countered. “I thought to take that place myself, but if you’re so eager...”

“But I can’t just kick you out of your own bed. Let me take the sofa.”

“You’re a guest, four-eyes. Take the fucking bed.” He gritted, annoyed by her stubbornness.

“Fine!” Hange threw her hands in the air. “If you’re so dead set on this, I’ll take the bed.” Levi’s lips almost curled into a victorious smirk. “But you’re sharing it with me.”

And the celebratory expression disappeared without a trace.

“…What? What do you mean?”

“I mean, let’s share the bed. You take one side, I take the other, no one sleeps on the sofa, we both sleep on a bed. Together.”

We both sleep on a bed. Together.

These words made blood rush to his face. He just recently discovered that he might be harboring some kind of feelings for Hange. He didn’t know yet just what kind of feelings. He didn’t know when all of that had started and what make of it. So sharing a bed… seemed like they were rushing things a bit.

“Isn’t that weird?” he asked, trying to find a way out of this situation. Preferably without revealing to Hange just what exactly was weirding him out so much.

“I don’t think so, no.” Hange shrugged. “I mean, we’ve shared the bed before.”

“It was one time,” Levi said, understanding exactly what she meant. “And we didn’t share a bed. You fell on top of me while we were napping on a sofa in the office.”

“That wasn’t the only time we’ve shared the bed, though,” Hange remarked. “Remember Erwin’s birthday party?”

“We were drunk,” Levi crossed hands on his chest. “And technically we weren’t sharing.”

“How so?”

“You were sleeping between Erwin and me. It’s not sharing.”

“It is!” Hange huffed. “I was sharing a bed with you and Erwin. Your hands were on my waist! That counts as sharing.”

Oh. His hands were on her waist? Levi’s mind thankfully obscured that detail.

“And if it makes you feel less awkward, it wouldn’t be just us in this bed tonight too.”

“Huh?”

“Grim,” Hange smiled. “I’m sure he’ll join us too.”

Levi scowled. “He is not allowed on a bed.”

“Sure,” her smile turned into a smirk. “Keep lying, Ackerman.”  

“Fine,” he shook his head. “I’ll go wash Grim and prepare a bath for you. And then you’ll shut up, take a bath and we’ll go to sleep. It’s late and I had a hell of a day because of you.”

“I’ll go make tea for us in the meanwhile,” she moved past Levi, heading to the kitchen. She stopped when she was right next to him and left a kiss on his cheek. Levi’s heart did a flip. “Thanks for everything,” she whispered, before disappearing into a kitchen.

Levi stood there, with a hand pressed to his cheek, gently touching the place Hange kissed for an embarrassingly long moment. He would have continued to remain frozen on that spot, if it weren’t for Grim, who started to whine loudly, getting impatient of waiting for Levi to snap out of it and take care of him.

“Shit,” he cursed, running a hand through his hair. Just what Hange was doing to him? “I’m coming!” he yelled, hurrying to his pet.

 ***

Levi put his hands around Hange, pulling her closer. He inhaled her faint scent and smiled, tracing the contour of her shoulder with his nose.

Hange turned in their embrace, facing Levi. She looked him in the eyes, the corners of her lips lifting in a soft, loving smile.

“It’s so good to be reunited, isn’t it? After long two years of being apart?”

“Yes,” Levi breathed out, unable to do anything but stare at her, devotion shining in his eyes.

“Do you think this is going to last?” her voice was honeyed, sweet. Too sweet, Levi realized as Hange’s smile changed. It wasn’t soft. Or loving. It was cold and cruel. “Do you think you can make me stay?”

Hange shook her head, disappointment replacing the once tender expression. Before Levi could say anything, ask her a question or give her some kind of an answer, she disappeared, slipping between his fingers. Like she wasn’t even there. Levi stared at the now empty space beside him with widened, shocked eyes.

“No,” he whispered weakly, grasping the sheet, where Hange just laid. “No, don’t go, don’t leave me alone, not again.”

He was cold, and the room around him was dark. It pressed on him, making him feel like a small frightened boy. The panic gripped and ceased him, suffocating him in its tight, loveless embrace.

And then— as though out of nowhere, there were warm hands on his face and gentle, insisting voice in his ear, calling out his name, repeating it again and again.

Unable to resist, he followed it.

He opened his eyes and he was still in his room, but— it was different from before. It wasn’t engulfed in darkness anymore, the lamp on his bedside table illuminating everything, and he wasn’t alone, Hange— Hange was hovering above him.

She was looking at him with a mixture of worry and confusion, her hair was out of the usual ponytail and seemed to be even more of a mess, the glasses were gone too and Hange was squinting, which made her look like a disheveled, one-eyed owl.

She looked ridiculous, Levi thought. He wanted to stare at her for hours.

“Levi?” she asked in a quiet whisper.

“Sorry for waking you up,” he said, embarrassment making his voice even gruffer than usual. “Go back to sleep.”

He turned away from her, switching off the lamp. A couple of minutes passed and the room was still silent. Levi closed his eyes, hoping that Hange was merciful enough to spare him and forget about the whole incident.

Of course, that was foolish of him. Hange forgetting about something? Nothing more than a wishful thinking on his part.

“Hey,” Hange called. “Do you want to talk about that?”

“No.”

“I do.” She said matter-of-factly. “You had a nightmare.”

Levi snorted. “Great deduction, detective Zoe.”

“That nightmare was about me.” It wasn’t a question, but Hange still paused for a second, giving Levi a chance to confirm or deny it. He remained silent. Hange took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. You’re… suffering because of me—”

“Shut up,” he cut her off harshly, preventing her from spitting out even more nonsense. “You came back, Hange. You’re here now. That’s more than I could ask for.”

“Come here.”

Suddenly, there was a hand on his arm, turning him around.

“I want cuddles.” Hange explained with a silly grin.

“I don’t.” Levi glowered.

“Yes, you do,” she threw her arm over him, laying a head on his chest. “He does want to cuddle, right, Grim?”

Grim, who was lying at the foot of the bed answered by putting his head on Levi’s leg.

“Good grief,” Levi muttered, wrapping his hand around Hange’s shoulder. She nuzzled into his chest with a contended sigh.

Levi was glad that the room was dark this time. It made it easier for him to hide a smile.

***

“So!” Hange rubbed her hands in anticipation, looking around the police precinct with an excited smile. “What’s our plan of action?”

“I’m catching up on all of my paperwork.” Levi said. “You sit tight and watch me work.”

“Boring,” Hange answered flippantly. “Didn’t we use to visit forensics first thing in the morning? You know, to get updates about the clues and stuff?”

“There are no clues, remember?”

“Right,” she scratched her chin. “But, maybe, they found something?”

“They would have informed me already.”

“Maybe, they forgot?”

Levi sighed. “You just want to visit the forensic department, don’t you?”

“Yeah,” Hange agreed with a shrug. “Shall we?”

“You go,” he gave her a slight push. “There is something I need to do first.”

“Eh?” a confused crease formed between Hange’s eyebrows. “And where are you going?”

“I’ll join you soon.” Hange continued to stare at him. She put hands on her hips and narrowed her eyes, silently demanding a more detailed answer. Levi sighed again. “I’m going to get my tea. And then I’ll come back, alright?”

“Oh,” Hange snickered, giving him an amused look. “Alright, go get your tea, shorty, I’ll be waiting for you.”

“Detective Ackerman! Detective Zoe!” before Hange and Levi could go their separate ways, a man approached them. To Levi, he looked distinctly familiar.

“Oluo!” Hange greeted with a smile, bringing Levi up to a speed.

Right, Oluo Bozard, a police technician and Petra’s old colleague. A man who was foolish enough to follow through with her reckless schemes.

“How is Petra?” Hange asked, while Levi was too busy glaring holes at the man. “Did you two get back home safely last night?”

“That’s what I wanted to ask you actually,” Oluo rubbed his neck. “Petra, haven’t you two seen her? She doesn’t pick up the phone and she isn’t at your office.”

“Since this weirdo is with me today,” Levi pointed to Hange, earning a playful punch to the arm from her. “I texted Petra this morning, told that she can have a day off. She’s probably still sleeping.”

“Poor thing,” Hange shook her head. “She must be so exhausted.”

“Oh,” Oluo nodded. “I was starting to get worried, but Petra is just lazing around? A weight of my shoulders,” he wiped the imaginary sweat from his forehead and smiled. “Thank you, detectives. Have a good day!”

“You too!” Hange waved at him, then turned to Levi. “Don’t take too long, shorty, I’ll be downstairs.”

“Just… be careful, four-eyes.”

“Huh?”

Levi gave her a knowing look, as corners of his lips curled into a small smirk. “They don’t know about your miraculous resurrection. Don’t give our scientists a heart attack, alright?”

Hange snorted, clasping his shoulder in delight. “I’ll try my best,” she promised, before hurrying to the stairwell that led to the forensics department.

“What an idiot…” Levi whispered, watching her go with a fond look in his eyes.

  ***

Moving on her tiptoes, Hange carefully made her way down the stairs. She slowly and quietly approached the entrance to forensic department, and then carefully touched the handle, remembering that it used to have an extremely annoying habit of rattling very loudly every time someone moved it.

Two years later, and that particular problem still hadn’t been solved. She softly gripped the handle and turned it, trying to be as stealthy as possible.

She took all the precautions not because she wanted to give the scientists a heart attack, as Levi had so bluntly put it. She just… wished to see a look of shock and surprise on their faces. It would be hilarious, Hange thought, already anticipating Moblit’s wide-eyed and pale-faced look, Nifa’s squeal, Keiji’s shout and Abel’s cursing.

It would be hysterical. Levi would regret not coming with her.

With that in mind, Hange threw the door to forensics department open. “Hey, guys!” she yelled, waiting for the gasps of surprise to reach her ears.

They never did.

Nifa, Moblit, Keiji and Abel all ran out to see her. There were wide smiles on their faces and happiness shining in their eyes.

No shock, though. No surprise. Hange couldn’t help but feel disappointed.

Did the miraculous returns of the people who were presumed dead for two years become such a common thing nowadays? Not worthy even a single ‘what the fuck’?

“We missed you so much!” Nifa wrapped her arms around Hange’s neck, bringing her down to a hug. Hange embraced her back, forgetting about her chagrin for a moment.

“What are you standing there for?” Nifa scolded, turning around. “It’s supposed to be a group hug, you idiots!”

Laughing in embarrassment, Moblit was the first to join Nifa. Keiji and Abel, complaining about Nifa’s bossiness in hushed murmurs, were quick to follow her order as well.

“Ah, guys, I missed you too,” Hange sighed, happy as ever. Having four people curled around her body wasn’t exactly comfortable, but Hange felt warm, she felt loved and appreciated.

She felt at home.

  ***

“So who ratted me out?” Hange asked, after Keiji had put a cup of coffee and a plate of Nifa’s delicious cheesecake in front of her. “Who told you that I’m not actually dead? Was that Levi, that blabbering gossiping midget?”

“Um, no?” Abel answered with a confused frown. He had some troubles imagining Levi as blabbering. Or gossiping. Or anything else, except a menacingly looking, constantly scowling man.

“Then was it Erwin?” throwing a piece of cheesecake in her mouth, Hange leaned closer, watching all of them carefully. “Did that handsome bastard finally grow tired of keeping my secret and decided to spill it out for everyone?”

“It wasn’t him either,” Nifa smiled. “It was Petra who told us.”

“Petra?”

“Yeah, you know,” Moblit chimed in. “Detective Ackerman’s new partner.”

“Of course, I know Petra,” a wide smile appeared on Hange’s lips. “She’s such a sweet girl. I take it, you already bonded with her?”

“She’s nice,” Keiji shrugged, sipping on his coffee.

“And very kind,” Moblit agreed.

“And so fricking pretty!” Nifa added. “If that idiot Oluo ever grows tired of her…”

“Sorry, Nifa,” Hange chuckled, patting the girl’s hand sympathetically. “But I saw them the other day. If anyone is going to grow tired, it’s definitely not Oluo.”

“What a shame,” Nifa stared into her cup of coffee, shaking her head.

“By the way, Hange,” Abel said, diverting attention from heartbroken Nifa. “I’ve gotta say, the eyepatch looks good on you.”

“Yes!” Nifa perked up. “You look so badass.”

“Ah, you think so?” Hange touched the eyepatch with her fingers, a look of self-doubt painting her features.

“You look cool as hell,” Keiji assured her with a warm smile.

Hange’s cheek reddened slightly, as she gave a small nod, silently thanking everyone for the compliment.

“Where is detective Ackerman?” Moblit asked suddenly. “Is he not going to join us?”

“He doesn’t trust your taste in tea, so he went to get his own,” Hange explained with a fond look. “He’ll be there in a moment.”

“What an insufferable little man!” Nifa muttered with a dark expression. “We still keep his favorite brand of tea,” she huffed irritably. “If only he visited us more often, he’d know that.”

“Why are you here today?” Abel questioned Hange. “Does that mean—”

“That it’s a ‘bring your best friend to work’ day?” Hange forced out a laugh, pushing her glasses up.

“So you won’t… return?” Moblit looked into her eyes. His sad, disappointed look broke Hange’s heart.

She took a breath, turning her gaze away. “I don’t know if I’ll return,” she said earnestly. “But… I really want to.”

“So!” she clasped her hands together, destroying the tense silence that fell over the room after her words. “Do you have a nice, horribly mutilated corpse to show me?”

“Oh,” Nifa smirked, her eyes glinting wickedly. “We have just what you need.”

  ***

Levi leaned against the doorway, unnoticed by everyone. With Hange at the center of the table, it didn’t surprise him. He watched her exchange jokes with the others, smile and laugh, and he thought – finally, everything is as it should be.

He realized he had missed not just Hange, he had missed this, a life he used to have, a routine he was accustomed to, a routine that disappeared ever since Hange was gone.

He missed coming down there with Hange, missed listening to her nerdy conversations with their colleagues and looking at the disgusting, revolting corpses with her, missed dragging her out of the forensics department and into their office, forcing her to get to actual work.

He wondered if this life was ever going to return. He desperately hoped so.

“Hey, detective Ackerman!” Abel’s friendly voice distracted Levi from his gloomy thoughts. “Come join us, the tea is getting cold!”

“We still have your favorite brand, by the way,” Nifa scolded him, wearing a disgruntled expression. “You would have known this, if you actually visited us more often than once in a lifetime.”

“Sorry,” Levi mumbled. Nifa’s strict voice and vicious glare actually made him feel bad. “Thanks for the tea.”

“I saved you a place!” Hange said, standing up.

“And where are you going?” Levi narrowed his eyes, suspicion swirling in his gaze.

“Nifa and I have some business in the dissection room,” Hange leaned in, lowering her voice to a whisper. “She promised me a cool corpse!”

“Ugh,” Levi pushed her away. “You don’t change,” he told her. His voice sounded much fonder than he intended it to.

“Yeah, love you too,” Hange ruffled his hair and left, hurrying after Nifa.                

His heart skipped a beat at that. Levi stared in the distance for a long moment, failing to calm his racing heart.

“Detective?” Moblit carefully touched his elbow. “Are you—”

“I’m fine,” he gritted through teeth, snapping out of his stupor. “Don’t you dare to say a word,” Levi threatened, scowling at Moblit, Keiji and Abel.

He picked up his cup, hiding a blush behind it. Damn Hange and her annoying ability to always embarrass him. That part of her he most certainly didn’t miss.

  ***

“If watching me work gets you so damn interested,” Levi muttered without looking up from a mountain of paperwork on his desk. “Then lend a fucking hand, four-eyes.”

“Don’t distract me,” she chided, throwing a paper plane right in the middle of his desk. “I’m thinking.”

“Thinking?” Levi crumpled the plane in his hands, changing its trajectory into a trashcan. “I wasn’t aware you could do that. New skill of yours?”

“Asshole,” another paper plane hit him in the side of his head. Levi cursed, crumpling this one with much more force. “If you’re such a douche, I won’t tell you what I was thinking about.”

Oh. That got Levi curious.

“I’m listening,” he said. He sat back in his chair, directing his gaze on Hange. The paperwork lay forgotten on his desk. Levi ignored it. He also ignored Erwin’s voice in his head that reminded him that he was supposed to finish all of it today. He was working for over an hour now. He deserved a small break.  

“Well,” Hange huffed, raising her nose up in distain. “Now I don’t want to tell you.”

“Hange,” Levi took a paper from his desk, crumpled and threw it at her, making her look at him. “I’m listening,” he said, looking her in the eye.

Hange’s demeanor changed instantly. She lowered her gaze and shook her head. “You would think I’m stupid…” she quietly mumbled.

“I already know that you’re stupid, four-eyes, so, c’mon, spill it out already.”

“After all this is over…” Hange began, drawing invisible patterns on the surface of her desk. “You know the murders and that shit with Zeke… do you think I can come back?”

“Hange,” Levi looked at her seriously. “Tell me one thing, please – are you an idiot?”

Hange glanced up, blinking in surprise. “…What?”

“You saw how much everyone misses you today, and you still have any doubts about coming back?”

“I doubt it’d be so easy…” Hange fumbled with her thumbs. “I’m presumed dead, after all.”

Levi rolled his eyes, exasperated. “I’m pretty sure Erwin can clear that out in no time.”

“But after those two years, would I be able to… fit it?”

“You’re definitely an idiot,” Levi declared, biting his tongue from saying something much worse. “Tell me one goddamn reason why you wouldn’t fit in.”

Hange shrugged, studying her nails so intently like it was the most interesting thing in the world. “You have a new partner now.”

“That’s… what got you so worried?” Levi spoke, his voice full of surprise.

“Well… I just don’t want another partner, I guess.”

“Idiot,” Levi repeated once again. “I don’t want another partner too, I don’t think Petra is going to be very upset if Erwin finds her a new one.”

“Oh!” Hange finally looked up, her face bright and excited. “You would want to continue working with me?”

“No,” Levi said in a dead-pan voice. “Working with my best friend is absolutely awful, I hated every second of it, that’s why I was so depressed after your death.”

“Gosh, you’re such an asshole,” Hange said, a smile breaking on her face.

Levi couldn’t help but curl his lips upwards too. “And you’re an idiot.”

“Erwin would be ecstatic to have you back too,” he remarked, turning back to his papers. Looking at Hange’s smile made him think silly things. It made him want to press his lips to that smile and taste if it was really as sweet as it looked. He shook his head slightly, struggling to return his attention to work.

“Oh?”

“Yeah, you were his best detective, after all.”

“Hm.” Hange frowned. “Weren’t you the precinct’s best?”

“No,” Levi said, his voice much gruffer than usual. The pen in his hand trembled from the force he was holding it with. “Without you, I wasn’t.”

“Levi…” Hange whispered.

She stood up suddenly, the scraping noise from her chair filling the too quiet room. She walked up to his desk and sat at the edge of it. She slowly reached out to him, curling her hand around his shoulder, and as Levi looked up, he saw that she was staring down at him with a mixture of fondness and shyness.

“Maybe, it’s not the right time for this, but I’ve always wanted to tell you…” she paused, looking down for a second. Then she took a deep breath and—

And then someone knocked on the door. It was loud and insistent, and Levi cursed whoever was behind it. What was Hange going to tell him? He wanted to know. He wanted to know so much he was ready to ignore the irritating knocking.

Hange had another opinion, though.

“Come in!” she shouted, turning away from Levi.

The door opened, and a sweaty, heavy-breathing Oluo tumbled inside.

“Detectives!” he managed to yell between his pants. “Have any of you heard from Petra?”

Levi and Hange exchanged a glance. “No?”

“I’ve just returned from her apartment,” Oluo explained, nodding gratefully at Hange, who offered him a glass of water. He gulped half of it in one go. “It was— it was empty. Her coat and shoes were inside and—”

“And the door?” Hange asked.

“Unlocked.” Oluo answered.

“Shit. Have you noticed anything else?”

“Yes,” Oluo nodded, opening his coat and taking something from the inner pocket. “This was lying on Petra’s windowsill.”

Hange snatched a small bag out of his hands, pushing her glasses up and inspecting it carefully. “A cigarette butt…” she whispered with a troubled expression.

Levi was instantly by her side. “I take it, the brand is familiar?” and before Hange could answer, he added. “Zeke smokes a lot, does he not?”

“I don’t—”

“I knew we couldn’t trust him,” he growled, clenching his fists. “I told you we couldn’t, and now Petra—”

“I don’t think that’s him, Levi,” Hange said, cutting him off. “Just think about it,” she continued, starting to pace around the office. “It’s Zeke we’re talking about, a man so evasive we spend a whole year chasing after him, and now, what? He forgets to throw out his cigarette butt? Even though, he knows we may still suspect him? He’s much smarter than that.”

“So what are you saying?”

“Someone is setting him up,” Hange concluded confidently. “Now I’m sure of it.”

“And what about Petra?” Oluo spoke up. “Do you really think she was… kidnapped?”

“Shit.” Levi muttered with feeling. He didn’t want to believe that Oluo’s conclusion was right, but… then he remembered a note they’ve found at the scene of a second murder and… it was the only possible explanation.

“We need to start the search,” Hange announced in commanding voice. “Levi, go and inform Erwin about this, tell him to gather as much people as he can. Oluo, rest a bit, then go back to your department. If there are officers you unquestionably trust, ask them for help as well. We’ll meet right there in two hours.”

“Oi!” Levi grabbed her sleeve, catching up with Hange, who was already by the door. “And where are you going?”

“To Zeke,” Hange said. “I need to make sure he’s innocent. And, who knows, maybe, he’ll be able to help us.”

“Hange…”

“I’ll be fine,” she gave him a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to die on you for a second time.”

“You better keep this promise, four-eyes.” Levi spoke darkly. “Because I’m not letting you go for a second time. Good luck.”

Hange nodded. “I’ll see you soon.”

  ***

There was a pounding, pulsing pain that was impossible to ignore. It felt like someone was hitting her head repeatedly with a hammer and simultaneously squeezing her brain inside the tight clutches. It felt like a hundred hangovers combined.

And it was made exponentially worse by hushed voices to her left that just didn't shut up.

Groaning softly, Petra opened her eyes. And closed them instantly as a new, much stronger wave of pain hit her. Her eyes felt like they were burning, her head felt like it was going to explode.

What had happened to her?

Fighting through pain, Petra tried to focus, searching through her brain for the recent memories. She was... with Oluo, and together they've broken into Sannes' office. Levi had come then, with detective Zoe in tow. And after that... she went home. Petra remembered the feeling of exhaustion as she walked up the stairs to her apartment. And then... what happened then? She must have gotten to the front door, and, right... she had found it unlocked. She walked inside and saw a man and....

"Detective Ral. Did you and your partner receive my note?"

And then before she could do anything, cry out for help, try to defend herself or take out her gun, the man with an eerie smile attacked her. He seized her hands in his, his face moved closer to hers, she felt shooting pain at the back of her head and then... There was darkness.

And now she was strapped to a chair with a headache so fierce it made her nauseous.

God, it was pathetic. She needed to do something about it.

She opened her eyes again, this time more slowly. The room she was in was still too bright, but Petra persevered and carefully surveyed her surroundings.

The room wasn't big and it was mostly empty. There were no windows and the only source of light was a lightbulb that shone right above her head. Apart from a chair she was sitting on, the only piece of furniture inside was a long table that stood at the other side of the room.

That's where the voices came from. And that's where two figures stood. Petra recognized one of them right away, despite him standing with his back facing her.

Sannes.

That meant that the man beside him was his intern. The bastard who kidnapped her. The man with an eerie smile.

Engrossed in a conversation, the two men didn't seem to notice that she had regained her consciousness. Petra had to use it to her advantage.

Whatever they talked about, the discussion seemed heated. Petra strained her hearing, listening in.

"What the fuck were you thinking?" Sannes hissed, grabbing the other man by the collar of his shirt. "Do you understand what you've done? If Ackerman finds out—”

"He won't," the man responded calmly, easily throwing Sannes’ hands off him. “He won’t be able to find us, I took some precautions.”

“You— you took some precautions?” Sannes repeated, a breathless laugh escaping his lips. “What kind of precautions, you fucking dimwit? Do you know who you’re dealing with?”

“You said he wasn’t as good as he was before…” the man mumbled with a confused frown.

“And that still makes him ten times smarter than you!” Sannes snapped, turning away. “Fuck!” he yelled, gripping the side of his head. “Why did I even agree to help you out, I knew you were a fucking idiot. And now Ackerman will have all the proof he needs to get rid of me. Years of hard work!” he lamented. “And all of it wasted because of your idiotic stunt!”

“Calm down, I’ve got everything under control!” the man tried to placate Sannes. “We’re taking a huge risk, I know, but the reward will be worth it!”

“What kind of reward?” Sannes seethed. “Getting rid of Zeke? I never really cared about that! It’s you who are obsessed with that!”

“Zeke is a fool,” the man sneered, his voice full of disgust. “He’s not the man he was before. Ever since he took in that Zoe, he had made mistake after mistake. It’s time to put an end to this. It’s time for someone else to take over his legacy. Our gang needs a new leader. Someone, who has as much potential as Zeke, but who doesn’t yet possess any of his flaws. Someone, who is cunning and ruthless. Someone who will be able to success, where Zeke failed. There is only one man who can do this," he finished, and even from afar Petra could see a shine of adoration in his eyes.

Sannes scoffed, rolling his eyes, not moved by the passionate speech at all. "And who is that?"

"No one can achieve the greatness Zeke once possessed. Except," the man smiled, and the sight of it made shivers run down Petra's spine.

"His own brother."

[cherriesradio]

How MHA comforts your kid after a nightmare.

With Bakugo, Deku, and Todorki (Gn!reader)

Warnings: mentions of past abuse

Word Count: 1,863

Info on kids: (take in I got the names off a random website so tell me if it’s offensive)

Bakugo - Daughter, Named Ena, 6 years old

Deku - Twins, Girl: Fumiko, 10 years old, Boy: Akio, 5 years old

Todoroki - Son, Kento, 7 years old

Bakugo

He had been staying late for work, a habit he had been trying to stop for a while now. At least this time it was necessary because there was a big villain fight earlier that day, and he graciously offered to help with clean up.

Wanting to get the stress off your daughters shoulders, so decided to have a movie night.

Ena had taken a likening to Disney movies, some how. Though she did seem to most admire the villians more then the hero’s. Or the arrogant hero’s. Like father like daughter, I guess.

You pick Ena from school, on the way home she asks if what they showed on the news really happened, and “is daddy really hurt? I’m worried ‘bout daddy.”

You curse under your breath about why the fuck they would play the normal bloody and grim news infront of first graders. Sure, a lot of the kids parents are hero’s, but their parents should tell them that, not a TV.

You look at her at once at a spot light. Her sad face, her knees to her chest in the backseat. You place your hand on her knee.

“Don’t worry sweetheart. Daddy’s gonna be okay, he’s even helping clean up the mess later. So he’s gonna be home later than normal.”

Your happy when you see her get slightly less worried, knowing her dad is okay.

Once you get home you make her some ramen while she talks about her day at the counter.

You hand her the ramen, and offer taht after she does her homework and you check it, you could have a Disney movies marathon.

“What in the world is a movie marathon? Is it liek when those crazy people runnin’ for a while mile in like two minutes?”

You chuckle and roffles up her hair, kissing the top of her head. “It’s where you watch a bunch of movies in a row. We could do Disney.”

She instantly gains a spark in her eyes as soon as you say Disney, quickly squealing and running off to do her homework as quickly as she could.

Once she finished and you checked, her getting all the problems correct as normal, you get on the couch and start.

You go on for hours, at some points she sits down at the coffee table and plays with toys. Though she always ends up back cuddling into your chest, sitting in your lap, head turned to see the movie.

Around 10, she fell asleep. You thanked the lord that she didn’t have school the next day, also a little thankful she did stay up late, she would nap more the next day.

Quickly after you turned the movies off and fell asleep as well.

Bakugo sighed, annoyed that he had to stay till one in the morning to clean.

He was so ready to quickly eat left overs, kiss his little hothead of a daughters forehead, and then cuddle up to you as you slept. But NOPE, you just use to be all cUtE and cuddle with your daughter on the couch

How dare you be a good parent >:(

Though, Era seemed to be clingy tightly to your skin, surprising Bakugo on how you weren’t awaken by her uncut, sharp nails.

He moved to place his hand on her shoulder, his hot touch quickly waking her up with a loud “Daddy!”

You woke up very much startled by to daughter scream.

“Sweetheart what happened?” You say somehow quickly than Bakugo, turning quickly to her.

Era looked up at Bakugo, the slightest bit of relief going through her stressed mind.

“Daddy’s okay? R-right? He’s right there, he’s he’s gotta be okay?” Her eyes flickered from you and Bakugo.

You finally noticed that Bakugo was there, and was probably the one waking her up from her nightmare.

You stood up, hold Era on your hip. You hugged Bakugo, Era’s arms wrapped around both of you.

“What the hell happened?” He whispered, toward Era just barely couldn’t hear.

“She was worried about you, Love.”

Bakugo picked her out of your arms and put her legs around his waist.

“Listen, Babes. I’m never gonna be hurt to bad in a fight. Daddy’s to strong for that!” He smirked, quickly followed with a big grin when Era giggled.

“Daddy’s too great to get hurt!” She cheered, the past tear marks now seeming meaningless to her.

“Yeah!”

Deku

You were tired as normal after the large effort of getting the twins to bed. You knew you wanted to see Deku today, and also knew that he would get home late as normal.

At least he had lots of time in the day for you and your kids.

You drank some coffee, it was merely nine o’clock and Izuku wouldn’t be home till at least one in the morning.

You layed on the couch, putting on a queit movie as to not wake the kids.

“I’m home!” Izuku called, earlier than he told you.

“Izuku? I thought you said you would be home at one? It’s only 12.” You said while walking up to him.

“I wanted to surprise you, Lovely. I may have been held back, I thought I would come home before the kids even fell asleep.” He said, putting his arms around your waist and kissing your nose.

“Your an idiot.” You snickered at his plan.

“I’m your idiot.” He laughed, raising his hand from your waist. “And your stuck with me.” He said, pointing to the ring on his finger.

You laugh at your silly husband, who somehow still had that wholesome attitude after all the trama and hurt he insured over the years of being a hero.

You both go to bed, cuddle up to each other, kissing the others warm and welcoming touch.

When I the middle of the night you hear soft but quick knocks coming from the door.

“Izuku, could… could you get it?” You ask, him already on his way to the door.

He gently opened the door, to a tired looking Fumiko and a crying Aiko. Funiko’s hand was lightly on his back, holding his trembling body in place.

“Dad, dad I had I really and nightmare. C-can I sleep with you tonight?” Aiko muttered under his breath.

Izuku looked up towards Fumiko, trying to aka what had happened.

“He woke up a few minutes ago. He had a dream, I think you died or something. I tried to comfort him but he just wanted you and p/n.” (P/n: parental name (mom, dad, etc)

“Thanks, Fumiko. Go back to bed, I’ll let Akio sleep with us tonight.” He whispered, kissing his daughters forehead before she went back to their room across the hall.

He yawned and walked back to the bed, Akio on his hip. He gently shook you back awake.

“Lovely? Akio had a nightmare.” He told you, as you turned to face him. You had a sympathetic look on your face, looking into your child’s terrifyed eyes.

You nodded and reached your arms out to hold Akio in your arms. He plopped onto you, his face just far enough to be heard while talking.

“Dad and you are gonna be safe, right? Right, p/n?” He looked up at you. You nodded and wiped away his tears.

Izuku layed back down and run his hands through Akio’s hair, something that had always comforted you during the UA days, and even now.

Akio feel asleep with in minutes, and you kept him to your chest to make sure he wouldn’t get nightmares. Not with you and Izuku protecting him.

Todorki (warning; ANGST)

He was glad, he could finally get home early for once. He decided not to tell you, similar to Izuku, wanting to surprise you and Kento.

“Dears! I’m home early!” He smiled as he walked into the classic Chinese (?) home, ready for you and Kento to jump in and hug him.

But, instead of being welcomed home with a loving bear hug, he was welcomed with two terrified glares, and and a unmatching one that was filled with heat.

Endeavor.

“Shouto, your home early.” You said, wanting to interrupt the silence.

“Dear, why in the world is this bastard here?” He said with a growl.

“I didn’t know you had a son, Shouto.” Endeavor said. His scar seemed to have healed slightly over the years, though it was clearly visible still.

“What the hell are you doing here? I thought you were gonna stay out of my life from now on.” Shouto said, still having to look up at the tall man.

“I’m just visiting. You don’t have to hold a grudge.” Endeavor shrugged and turned back to you and Kento on the couch.

“Kento, right?” He titled his head, lowering his arms.

He picked Kento up.

The man who you had been told abused his children, beat his wife, killed mercilessly, took away the love of your life’s childhood, picked up your child.

Anger immediately pumped into your veins, you quickly tearing a terrified Kento from the old mans arms.

“Get away from my son!”

“You know, I never did think you were good for Shouto.”

You better believe Shouto took care of the rest.

You crattled Kento in your arms, not wanting to let go even long after he fell asleep. You had to keep yourself from holding onto him to hard, knowing that if you held on as hard as you wanted, you would crush the poor kid.

Shouto sighed and walked back in, walking into the bedroom where you held Kento.

“Dear.” He said in the doorway. His voice was soft and familar.

“Yes, love?” You said, peaking up at him.

He walked and sat down next to you, kissing your shoulder. You almost feel the pain oozing out of him. (God I hate “ooze” so much-)

“I’m sorry, Dear. I’ll…” He sighed and put his head in his hands. “I don’t even know. He refuses to retire and the government is a total suck up for him.”

You exhale and Lena on his shoulder.

“We are never letting that happen again.” You scoff in to his sleeve.

“Yes, of course. He’s never gonna come back here, into our home.” He safely added.

“Not that. Of course I’m still never gonna let him in again. I’m never letting that bitch hold my baby ever again.” You said. He gently smiled down at you, admittedly a little glad you had such a hatred of his father.

You grunted as Kento held on tighter to your waist where he had his arms wrapped around, his face wrinkled liek he just ate something sour.

This being familar, him sharing regular nightmares like his father, you softly woke him up.

“Dear? Dear wake up, the scary man is gone. He’s never coming back.” You said as Shouto softly shook his arm, and you shakes his slightly.

“Mh… p/n, Dad… I’m scared. He came back in my head.” He whimpered, tapping his forehead.

He leaned down and pressed his face on his stomach, peaking up with sad eyes at Kendo’s face.

“I know. We all are. But that’s never gonna happen again. We’ll make sure of it.”

[ncssian]

A Favor: Part One

Nessian Modern AU

Summary: Nesta Archeron isn't good with change. When her car breaks down in the middle of a storm and her sister sends one of her friends to pick her up, Nesta thinks there could be nothing worse than having to spend the night with a total stranger. Until she suddenly finds herself without an apartment. Despite only a night of knowing Nesta, Cassian is quick to offer her a room in his cabin free of charge, and Nesta, broke and without many social contacts, has no choice but to accept.

A/N: This fic is loosely inspired by @lady-therion 's fic Close Quarters. I couldn't stop thinking about Nesta and Cassian sitting in front of a fire, slowly getting to know each other, so this fic is a whole lot of that :) There's no strict plot structure to this so I'm not sure how long it's gonna be, but expect warm and fuzzy content in the beginning. Enjoy!

Masterlist

***

Cassian is in bed when he gets the text.

Feyre: hey i know it's late but i need you to do a huuuge favor for me

Feyre: i really hope you're not asleep yet

Cassian furrows his brows in concern, immediately thumbing back a text.

Cass: what's wrong?

Feyre takes a long minute to type back; wind howls and rain thrashes against his window while he waits. A long message finally appears.

Feyre: you know the shortcut through the woods off of main st? my sister's car broke down there and there's no 24/7 towing around. im all the way in velaris and won't be able to get there for another two hours, but i dont want her waiting in the woods in the middle of the night like murder bait. she's too proud to ask for help, but if you could go and pick her up that would mean a lot to me, please.

At the last sentence, Cassian immediately knows which sister Feyre is talking about. He glances out his window and curses under his breath. It's storming hell outside, and Nesta Archeron is sitting in a broken car in the middle of the woods somewhere.

He's already grabbed his keys and stuffed his feet into shoes when he realizes he never answered Feyre's text. He types out a short on my way and heads out the front door of the cabin, assaulted by rain and wind before he's even fully outside.

Cassian follows the location Feyre sends him, what should be a five minute drive taking almost fifteen in the storm.

Cassian has interacted with the oldest Archeron sister maybe twice in his three years of knowing Feyre. Once for an initial family meeting, where she gave a terse hello upon introduction to Cassian and his friends, before ignoring everybody for the rest of the dinner, and another time when he accidentally bumped into her as she was leaving Feyre's apartment. He remembers apologizing profusely, only to be given a weird look before she turned and left.

In summary, Cassian knows enough about Nesta to know that this won't be the most fun task he's ever been given. Still, he isn’t about to leave any woman rotting on the side of an empty road at this hour, in this weather.

There’s so much rain that he almost misses the car. His headlights catch on a lump of metal, and he slowly brings the truck to a stop. Throwing the gear in park, Cassian flips his hood over his head and runs out into the rain.

She’s already waiting for him when he reaches the car, standing in the freezing rain in nothing but a drenched sweater and jeans.

His first real words to Nesta Archeron come out surprisingly easy: “What the hell are you doing here?” he yells over the torrent.

“Making sure you could see me,” she shouts back. “You drive like a blind dog!”

Whatever Cassian says back gets lost in the rain, but soon he's ushering Nesta over to his truck and slamming the passenger door shut behind her. He returns to the driver's seat, Nesta audibly shuddering beside him.

He flips the air vents blowing hot air towards her. “You should’ve stayed in the car.”

Even soaked and freezing, Nesta summons up the energy to glare. “So you could run me over with your truck? No, thanks.”

“That’s an overreaction.”

Nesta doesn’t bother to reply. Silence fills the truck for a couple of minutes as Cassian tries to maneuver them out of the small backroad, carefully turning back for his cabin. There’s no way he can get Nesta back to her place tonight, and he suspects his phone notifications are already full of flash flood warnings.

Finally, he says, “I’m Cassian, by the way.”

Nesta looks at him like he’s stupid. “I know who you are.”

That takes him a little by surprise, but he only murmurs, “Okay, then.” He wonders how much Feyre told her sister about how this was going to go.

“We’re getting my car picked up first thing tomorrow,” Nesta says into the silence, “and Feyre will take me home so you don’t have to bother yourself.”

“It’s not a bother,” he responds a little too quickly. She only gives him another weird look, like she’s judging him to hell and back, and Cassian decides to quit speaking forever.

By the grace of some higher power, the drive back is faster than the drive to. The pounding of rain only gets heavier as Cassian pulls up to the house, until it becomes an unmistakable thunk. Nesta’s eyes shoot to the roof of the car. “What’s that,” she says sharply. Everything she says is sharp; he wonders if she does it consciously or not.

Another thunk hits the car, this time the windshield. Cassian sighs deeply at the ice assaulting the truck from all sides. “Hail,” he says, resigned with this whole night.

He and Nesta end up making another mad dash to the door, trying not to get hit by increasingly larger chunks of ice as they go. Nesta has a backpack that she holds close to her chest instead of using for protection from the hail, as if it’s a baby.

Once safely inside the cabin, she doesn’t let go of her grip on her bag as she looks around his home. “Nice place,” she breathes, eyeing the exposed wooden beams and towering glass windows. An iron-wrought chandelier lights up the main living area they’re in, lightning occasionally casting twisted shadows across the walls.

Cassian almost apologizes for it, before deciding that apologizing for having too nice of a house is one of those things that would earn him another weird look from Nesta. “Bathrooms are that way,” he says instead, pointing down the main hall. “I can get you some dry clothes…”

She’s already nodding sharply and heading for the bathroom, leaving Cassian to stand awkwardly in the entryway, soaked to the bone in the same sweats he was about to go to sleep in just an hour ago.

Upstairs, after changing into blissfully dry clothes, it takes Cassian a good five minutes to decide which of his shirts will work best for Nesta’s slim figure.

When he finally returns downstairs with sweats four times Nesta’s size, she snatches them out of his hands without a word and slams the bathroom door shut on his face. He stands there a moment longer, nods resolutely, and heads for the kitchen to whip up a hot beverage. Cassian has a feeling he won’t be getting any sleep tonight.

A couple of minutes later, Nesta appears in the kitchen doorway, looking hesitant and absolutely dwarfed in Cassian’s gray sweats. Somehow, she’s made the pants work, likely by rolling them up a hundred times.

Cassian’s eyes widen for a moment, realizing this is the longest look he’s gotten at Nesta since… well, since he first met her.

He remembers thinking she was stunning at that initial dinner at Feyre’s house all those years ago, but damn, he must have forgotten just how much. Because even messy and rumpled, Cassian can’t stop staring at her.

Nesta breaks the silence first. “Is that hot chocolate?” The hard edge has mostly left her voice, like the warm clothes have soothed her frayed nerves from the car ride.

“Um.” Cassian glances down at the steaming mug in his hands. “Yeah. You want some?” he offers before he can check himself.

Nesta further surprises him by nodding, tucking her sweater paws under her armpits. The position would look vulnerable and reserved on most people, but on her it’s just another fortification to her stiff demeanor. Cassian slides his mug over the marble island to her before starting on another drink for himself.

Feeling an urge to fill the silence while he works, Cassian babbles, “The guest rooms are upstairs. You can have your choice, but the master bedroom is mine, obviously.” He pours melted chocolate into a mug and grabs for cinnamon.

Nesta watches him move with her unnerving hawk eyes and nods slowly, taking careful sips from her mug. “I think I’m going to stay up and study for my midterms,” she finally responds. “You mind if I use your fancy living room?”

Cassian almost smiles at that. “The whole house is fancy,” he says. “But yeah, go for it.”

He’s surprised at how nice this feels. Not that having Feyre’s scary older sister over isn’t weird for him, but… having another presence in the cabin, especially at this late hour— it’s warm where Cassian’s nights are usually cold.

***

It’s past two in the morning when Nesta finally glances up from her laptop screen, eyes bleary and unable to take in another word of theoretical law. She’s rubbing her hands down her face when a sudden clap of thunder booms outside the cabin windows, making her nearly fall off the couch. “Christ,” she swears, unconsciously curling into herself.

“Scared of thunder?”

Nesta internalizes her surprise at the unexpected voice and glances up to see Cassian coming down the stairs, looking as awake as he did when he went to bed over an hour ago. Nesta becomes terribly aware of the state she’s in and has to fight to maintain her composure.

She peeled off Cassian’s oversized sweatpants as soon as he went upstairs, not having been able to take a step without almost tripping, and made up for the coldness of her bare legs by dragging the fur throw off the back of his leather couch and using it as a blanket.

“That's usually for decoration, you know.” Cassian gestures at the thick fur.

Embarrassment claws up her throat, for coming into this strange man’s house and taking his nice things and using them incorrectly. Her first instinct is to apologize, but the only thing she hates more than embarrassment is the word sorry. “I thought you were asleep,” she says instead.

Cassian only shakes his head as he takes a seat on the far end of the couch. “Sleep and I aren't friends tonight. I was thinking about watching a movie, but if you're still studying—”

Nesta quickly shuts her laptop, shaking her head. “I was just about to go upstairs,” she says, packing her things into her backpack. Despite the day she’s had and how heavy her eyelids are, she knows she won’t be able to sleep with the sporadic thunder still booming. She wants to ask Cassian if he has noise-canceling earplugs, but the last thing she wants is to inconvenience him further.

The fur throw slips off her as she stands, revealing her bare legs. She might be wearing the largest, least sexy sweater of all time, so she doesn’t know why she suddenly feels naked in front of Cassian. Risking a glance at the man himself, he only takes his eyes off the TV remote in his hand to say, “You can leave the pants behind if you don’t need them.”

Right. She neatly folded his sweats as soon as she took them off earlier, and now they sit patiently on the coffee table.

“It gets a little drafty at night,” Cassian adds, “but I stocked your room with blankets. It’s the second door on the left; I hope you don’t mind that I chose for you.”

Nesta distantly remembers him saying she could have her pick of bedroom. “I don’t care,” she says honestly. “But— thanks.” She clasps her bag to her chest and shuffles towards the stairs, only stopping at the foot of them when she remembers not to be rude. “Goodnight,” she calls out awkwardly, trying not to race up the stairs as she hears him say goodnight back.

Cassian’s cabin is without a doubt gorgeous, but Nesta still feels a little shock of surprise when she finds her designated room. Decked out with a four-poster bed and floor-to-ceiling windows, it’s nicer than any place Nesta’s ever stayed in before.

A bright flash of lightning fills the room, and Nesta’s shoulders immediately bunch up to her ears— the preparation doesn’t make the ensuing clap of thunder any less heart-thumping. Withholding a weary sigh, she moves to draw the thick curtains over the windows, hoping to add a barrier between herself and the storm. It’s going to be a long night.

***

The next morning, Nesta dials Feyre’s number for the third time, growing more irritated by the second. It’s eight a.m., but Feyre is supposed to be picking Nesta up before noon so she can take her car in and return home to her shitty basement apartment.

Finally, the line clicks. “Hello?” a groggy voice drawls over the phone.

“When are you coming?” Nesta demands.

“Uh, what?” Feyre still sounds like she’s waking up. Nesta could hiss.

“You promised you’d be here first thing today, Feyre. I can’t hang around at your friend’s place all day. I want to wear my own clothes and use my own toothbrush.”

“Oh, that,” Feyre says. “Listen, can you just have Cassian take you home?”

“Feyre—”

“I know you hate interacting with strangers, but he’s one of my best friends. It’s a two-hour drive up to the mountains, Nesta,” she speaks as if she’s trying to reason with a kindergartener.

Frustration boils up in Nesta, feelings that she’s in too much disbelief to put words to right now. Her jaw works, and all she ends up spitting is, “You promised.”

“You’re being dramatic. I’m going back to sleep now, call me when you get home safe.” Over the line, Nesta can hear mumbling— probably Feyre’s boyfriend waking up.

Nesta has to hang up before she says something she’ll be made to regret. Her fingers are bone-white around her phone, and she releases a restrained shriek before flinging her phone at the bed.

Still pissed but just a little mollified after the release of energy, Nesta takes a deep breath and heads downstairs to get breakfast.

Cassian is in the kitchen when she enters, sipping from a cup of coffee and watching another one brew in the coffee maker. His eyes are ringed with tired circles, proving he got about as much sleep as Nesta did the night before, but he seems content. She doesn’t miss his quick glance at her still-bare legs before his eyes flick up to her. “Good morning,” he offers with a quiet smile.

Nesta didn’t know Cassian was capable of such quietness— it’s a stark difference from how he is with Feyre and his friends, and maybe the nicest surprise she’s received since this shitty weekend began.

She cuts straight to it. “Feyre’s not coming,” she says, trying to gauge how he’ll react to this new inconvenience. “She told me to let you take me home.”

“I know,” is all Cassian says. His brow furrows when he sees her obvious disappointment. “She called me last night. Didn’t she tell you?”

Nesta’s hands curl under the long sleeves of Cassian’s sweatshirt, but she only shakes her head once. She’s distantly aware that she’s overreacting about a simple car ride, but nothing can take away her discomfort at asking favors from people she barely knows.

Not knowing how to continue the conversation, she says stiffly, “I want to wear my own clothes again.” Is that a good addition to the discussion? She genuinely can’t remember the last time she interacted with a man for non-work related purposes.

Cassian’s eyes light up and he sets down his coffee. “That reminds me, I put your clothes through the laundry this morning. They might still be warm from the dryer.”

Nesta wants to sag in relief at the first good news she’s gotten all morning. She follows Cassian’s directions to the laundry room and almost hugs her neatly folded clothes. While she changes into her clothes from the night before, she makes a list of today’s activities in her head:

1) Eat breakfast. Keep it quick and keep interactions with Cassian to a minimum, but don’t seem ungrateful.

2) Drive to her ancient rustbucket of a car. Make sure it’s okay after the hail and call the towing company.

3) Let Cassian drop her home.

4) Return to her room and not leave for a week.

Nesta sighs as her blue sweater settles around her frame. Only four tasks; it’s achievable enough.

Her first task is relatively easy. She wishes Cassian wouldn’t talk so much, because sometimes she doesn’t know what to say in return, but she also finds that she likes what she has to say. His opinion on the horror movie he watched last night doesn’t make her want to crawl out of the nearest window.

Cassian keeps breakfast short and gets them in the car by nine. It’s only after they’ve dialed a tow truck and Cassian kindly withholds judgment at Nesta’s faded blue lump of metal she calls a car that she gets the call.

It’s from her tenant, or rather, the nice elderly lady who lets Nesta live in her basement-turned-apartment.

“Lorene?” Nesta answers, confused.

“Oh, hun,” the woman answers, and from the sympathy in her voice, Nesta tenses up. “I headed downstairs this morning to check for mold and the rain...the whole basement’s flooded. There must have been a leak or something wrong with the entrance door, but I tried to grab as many of your things before I left.”

Nesta closes her eyes. Presses a forceful hand to her chest and tries to take calming breaths. “O-okay,” she says. “What does that mean, what do I do next?”

Cassian gives her a concerned look from where he leans against his truck. She ignores him.

“I’m getting the basement cleaned out and fixed as soon as I can, but the water damage looks pretty bad. The floors are probably gonna have to be replaced, and I don't know if insurance will cover this.”

She thinks of all her books and valuables in that apartment, taken out by the storm last night.

“You're going to have to find a new place to stay, hun. Most likely for a while.”

Nesta is on the verge of full-out panicking, but the last thing she needs is to have a breakdown in front of Feyre’s best friend. She clenches her fist so hard it hurts, and the bite of her nails takes away the sharp edge of her panic.

She breathes deep, but finally says, “I can do that.” She doesn't know if she can.

After a few more apologies from Lorene, Nesta finally hangs up, only to turn and brace her hands against the roof of her car.

“Everything alright?” Cassian asks slowly.

She needs a place to stay. Her mind works rapidly, going through the short, short list of people she might be able to ask for a bed to sleep on. Coming up empty, she moves on to the next option: motels.

Does she even have the money—?

“Nesta?” Cassian repeats. “What's going on?”

“I’m fine,” she says out loud, still not facing him. “I just need to break the bank a little and find a new place to stay, but it’ll be fine.”

“Find a new place to stay? What do you mean?” A light hand touches her elbow, and she whirls around in alarm. Cassian holds his hands up in placation. “Sorry, sorry,” he says.

Red-hot embarrassment creeps up Nesta’s cheeks. She’s losing it in front of this completely nice stranger—

She reins herself in, tries to remember things like common sense and social etiquette. “It’s okay,” she breathes out. “It’s really nothing. My apartment got flooded during the storm and I need to find a place to stay, and I’m upset, but I’ll get over it.” She nods resolutely, like the grown adult she is. Like she can afford to fix her car and pay for lodging at the same time.

Cassian considers her silently for a long moment, and Nesta thinks he must still be freaked out by her near-breakdown, when he finally says, “Well, you can always stay at my place.”

Her eyes might pop out of her head. “What? No. No.”

“Why not?” He turns hesitant. “Unless you have somewhere else to stay?”

Nesta’s silence is answer enough. She sees his gaze flip from questioning to determined and rushes to change his mind. “I won’t do that to you— I hate asking for favors and I hate making people go out of their way for me even more.” She sounds so forceful it comes off as harsh, which is all the better for convincing Cassian not to make her stay at his cabin.

“I have a feeling you hate a lot of things, Nesta.” He doesn’t back down. “You’re Feyre’s sister; the least I can offer you is free lodging.” After a moment, he adds, “Please.”

Nesta wants to laugh; he’s pleading with her to let her invade his home life. All because she’s Feyre’s sister. The reasoning leaves a bitter taste in her throat, but she doesn’t have the energy to argue with it. Not as the tow truck finally appears at the end of the road, driving up towards them. Cassian only looks at her. Decide now, he says silently.

Nesta exhales deeply through her nose. “Fine,” she grits. So much for getting through the day with her sanity unscathed.

***

Part Two

tagging: @ladywitchling @sjm-things @thewayshedreamed @drielecarla

[boop-le-snoot]

skin starving

tony stark x f!reader fluff. no warnings, just a few f-bombs. touch starved tony’s third person pov. words: 2,5k. no beta because i just really needed to get this off my chest.

recommended music to go with the story: two feet - 'love is a bitch' & 'quick musical doodles'. Or any lo-fi hip-hop radio really.

It started as an itch. At first, a small but bothersome thing, that kept him up at night, steering the already unreasonable hours of wakefulness into dangerous territory. The cold of his bed was unappealing and more often than not, he’d started passing out on the flat surfaces nearest to him: workshop, lab, common room couch, the lazy boy in Bruce’s apartment.

The team noticed, of course, they weren’t blind. They all had been on edge the first few months after Pepper left him. They expected him to act out, lock himself up in his lab or go back to his old habits of boozing and bringing home a different girl every night. And he had tried that, once or twice, but airheaded twenty-somethings weren’t appealing anymore. Most of the time their ass kissing and blatantly flattery annoyed him further into self-loathing abyss. He simply couldn’t step up to be the kind of man they described him to be - it seemed as if every woman on planet Earth had a whole list of expectations he specifically could not meet.

With Thor off planet, not one remaining person on the team was particularly touchy-feely. And that was the thing with Tony Stark: as an engineer, as a mechanic, he made his way through the world hands-first, every approach he had was hands-on. During late nights and early mornings, he laid in bed, sleepless and dreamless, desperately refusing to admit his own touch starvation.

Whenever Rogers threw an arm around his shoulders during a particularly successful team bonding activity, it took every ounce of willpower Tony had to not lean into it and purr like a cat. He hadn’t truly forgiven Steve for his cold, cruel words of criticism shortly after Pepper’s departing. He wasn’t going to chummy up to a man who thought him selfish, opportunistic and self-absorbed.

Tony became irritable and withdrawn. He simultaneously craved and avoided even the casual, friendlier attention his teammates gave him on a daily basis. His usual snark became that much more biting, having caused several people to storm out of team meetings.

On a cold autumn morning, Tony had found his way at the tower’s Starbucks on the employee floor. He had squeezed a generous five hours of restless sleep and he was sick of the plain black coffee in his kitchen. A spontaneous desire for something sweet and creamy and caffeinated led him to the place in line at the cafeteria, only a few early birds ahead of him.

Tony’s brain was hazy as it had been past few weeks, dull from the lack of rest and the hyperfixation of his own skin feeling alien to him. For once, he wasn’t typing away on his StarkPhone as he usually did to avoid being bothered; Tony stared straight ahead, unseeing, nothing but white noise in his usually racing brain.

Two women stood in front of him and he couldn’t help but overhear a part of their conversation.

“… Are you really horny or just lonely or touch-starved, though? I mean, Tinder? It’s not really your style.”

“Eh, I dunno. Probably the second but it’s not like men go on Tinder to find a cuddle buddy.”

“Well, maybe? I’ve heard about arrangements like that.”

“No offense, babe, but it’s probably kids in their early twenties. Those gen-z’s, babe, are weird. I’m not really up to date on all of that.”

The topic of the conversation was what piqued Tony’s interest; the world liked rubbing salt into his wounds and hysterically laugh at his misfortune. Bleary-eyed, he briefly scanned the two women: both appeared to be interns or junior techs in his company, evident by the purple employee badges hanging from their bags.

“So what are you going to do?” One woman asked the other as their turn to order took Tony one step closer to obtaining his desired caffeine.

“Unless someone normal magically appears with an offer of no-strings-attached, good ole’ snuggle fest, I guess I’m getting dicked down on Saturday,” The other replied with a teasing tone. The lack of excitement in the last part of the sentence was obvious.

“Gross,” The first one shook her head and hurriedly rattled off her order to the barista who looked about as disgruntled as Tony felt.

Hours and three coffees later, Tony’s overactive brain was still stuck on that woman from the cafeteria. Her back, her purse stuffed full of colorful manila folders, her neatly gathered hair - Tony Stark had nearly perfect memory and he remembered every single detail despite his brain fog. Objectively, she was attractive, no more no less than a different dozen of women he’d seen at any point in his life before. So why was he hung up on her?

It didn’t take him a long time to find her file, faster than he’d liked to admit. Manually sorting through hundreds of interns, lab technicians and various second-tier employees wasn’t exactly considered productive but with Pepper and her nagging out of the picture, Tony could afford to slack off a little bit.

So he found her name and her e-mail address, skimmed over her performance report with satisfaction, finding her to be a busy bee in the 90-th percentile. Her superiors considered her trustworthy, hard-working and communicative, all good traits.

Pepper’s absence meant he’d have no one to cover his ass should he get slapped with a harassment suit; however, he was the Tony Stark after all. He had more money that he’d cared to count and an army of lawyers at his disposal 24/7.

Amidst the jumbled mess of wires, circuit boards, tablets, empty coffee cups and the occasional piece of paper, Tony typed up an e-mail to the woman sharing his… Condition.

“I heard you and your friend talking at Starbucks. I could use a cuddle buddy. Wine and Netflix at my place? What’s your takeout preference?”

No. That came off way too creepy, like he was some kind of a dirty eavesdropper.

He contemplated some more, typing up and erasing multiple e-mails with various proposals: his penthouse, her place, a three Michelin star restaurant, a walk in the park. Almost all of it screamed ‘date’, like he’d drag her off to bed the very moment an opportunity wouldn’t present itself. It wasn’t so: Tony Stark, the playboy genius, had his dick firmly tucked into his pants. The thought of fucking her crossed his mind only briefly, quickly being chased away by the thought of her fingers running through his hair. Her warm, soft body in his arms. Just laying on his couch, eyes closed, reveling in each other’s arms.

Tony hit send on the least obnoxious option. He baited his breath, clicking his fingers in anticipation as the message showed itself to having been delivered.

“Mary, is this you trying to be funny? Stark is going to fire you if he finds out you’re impersonating him to stop your friend from going on a questionable date. Grow up.” Came the very prompt reply, ending with a short string of angry emojis. Tony could totally trust a person who used emojis unironically and generously.

“For the record, I wouldn’t be mad if somebody pretended to be me for the sake of saving their cute friend from a creep. The problem would be making it look credible.” Tony typed up the answer without thinking, quickly snapping a picture of himself holding the Starbucks cup with his name written on it, throwing his usual sloppy peace sign. He attached it to the email and hit send.

“WTF” Came the reply not a minute afterwards. He let it sink in, giving the woman some time to gather her wits. She did not disappoint. “Okay, even if we pretend this is real - which I doubt - what’s in it for you? If you heard our conversation, you surely know my stance on the matter.”

“I’m always glad to prove you wrong. I’m a genius - comes with the territory.” Tony simply couldn’t resist adding a generous dose of snark. “You’re welcome to meet me after clocking out. Use the private elevator, my AI will beam you up.”

The reply took a considerably long amount of time, seeing as previously, she typed back rather quickly. “Please don’t be a creepy rapist, Scotty. Fingers crossed.” Tony managed to almost break his stylus twice. His hands shook, and he had to tell himself to breathe - still, he laughed at the clever way she replied.

Several more hours later, during which Tony had nearly paced a hole through various floors on the residential side of the tower, he took a quick shower, dressed in a flattering but comfortable designer sweatpants and polo combo and made himself at home on the obscenely large living room sofa on his own, private penthouse floor.

He was up and running towards the elevator when Friday’s voice notified him of the woman entering the elevator on the employee floor. Tony tousled his hair, adjusted his glasses, fiddled with the drawstring of his pants.

The woman was wearing casual office wear, pants and a loose blouse, a lab coat loosely draped over her arm and her purse hanging off the shoulder on a thin strap. Her hair was loose now, a little frizzy as if she continuously ran her hands through it. Tony quietly rejoiced at not being the only nervous one.

Clever eyes scanned the room with unhurried interest before finally landing on him. “Not too shabby, if I say so myself,” The corners of her mouth tilted in an attempt at a smile, it was obvious she was studying him.

“Thanks, I try my best,” Tony smirked. Humble he was not. “So, how do you want to do this?”

“I see a comfortable couch,” She looked to be grateful for being given the opportunity to lead this interaction. “Let’s park our behinds on it, bicker for ten minutes about a movie choice and settle on one none of us really like. Then we can tell each other our no-no zones and, well, yeah,” She started out confidently. Probably practiced in the elevator. But towards the end, her shyness took over.

For Tony, it was kind of cute. A nice change from suck-ups that flocked him at every social gathering in hopes of getting something out of him. The woman that had tossed her bag carelessly on the far end of the couch and untucked her blouse looked and felt like the exact opposite of those people. She looked willing to give.

Tony sat next to her, keeping a couple of inches of free space between them. “Food preferences? Food allergies?” He asked, tapping the food delivery application.

“Nope, and I will eat just about anything.” He felt more than saw her side-eyeing him. Both of them were jittery. So uncharacteristic for Tony, to be blushing and stammering like a high school boy. Sex was easy, but intimacy? Complex. It was addictive and eventually, painful.

Movie decisions were surprisingly easy and she said so. They settled on a Tarantino classic, an old flick neither of them had watched in a long time. As the discussion progressed, Tony used his wits to find out more about her without making it seem like an interrogation. He had run a background check on the woman and her family but those only went that far, besides, it was a great opportunity to practice the tips Natasha had shared with him at one point or another. Being friends with spies had it’s perks.

They ate their food until their bellies were full. A comfortable, relaxing stupor, being warm from the inside out.

Tony noticed when the woman spoke, she spoke with her hands. She had caught herself grasping his forearm multiple times when they’d got more passionate about their discussion. And what Tony loved the most was that she refused to apologize. He saw a kindred soul in the woman; quiet until something struck her fancy. Then, she became a whirlwind of ideas and opinions.

In no time, it became a natural action to extend his arm and wrap it around her shoulders, reclining backwards. There was little grace in laying belly-up like a dead fish but the woman didn’t seem to mind. Watching him out of the corner of her eye, she laid down sideways, throwing a leg over one of his own.

Her palm traced the outline of his arc reactor when something on the screen caught her in a moment of intense interest. Tony preferred to avoid the cursed thing - scars around it definitely did not do any favour to his aging, marked body - but he found himself exhaling the tension when it was obvious the woman really did not care. An occasional quiet hum of satisfaction was the only noise that came from her: he noticed the sound escaped her lips every time his thumb began fiddling with the sleeve of her blouse and rubbed against her arm.

He was quite content. It was warm, he was surrounded by so much warmth.

The hug was mutual when she left home, both of them comfortable with the gesture for people who had met in a rather unconventional way.

She started coming over a couple of times a week, a quiet evening of the best takeout in NYC and (mostly) interesting movies. A solace, always a single e-mail away.

Tony saw her in the cafeteria once or twice; he appreciated the brief, tiny secretive grin she gave him out of her friend’s eyesight. She never approached him. He was grateful for that. He didn’t want to deal with all the drama and all the fuss surrounding incidents between him and his employees. It was nobody’s business what any of them did after clocking out - and him and his cuddle buddy, they weren’t even fucking, for Thor’s sake.

Maybe they would get there someday. Or maybe they won’t. It was only now for Tony. The rare free Saturday night he had, he truly took a vacation from all the bullshit and lured her in with promises of very expensive wine, her favourite New York style pizza and the willingness to entertain watching a few of those funny YouTube videos she liked.

They did watch them and Tony didn’t mind. He stepped over the irrational fear and the initial discomfort and curled up around her, hiding his face in the soft cotton of her worn hoodie, his own breath tickling his face in warm puffs. The hand running through his hair was tender like it never was with Pepper - his ex was far too preoccupied to baby her grown-up boyfriend. But the woman moulded to his body like an extension of himself was happy to do so. Tony’s hair was longer now and it glided perfectly along the woman’s palms.

His heart was steady, thumping in his ears, overshadowing the noises coming from the TV. He exhaled and felt her other hand begin tracing circles on his back, as if she saw the stress and the bitterness leave his body with every caress, every brush of their bodies. Maybe she did?

He held onto her, held her back like she’d held him. Safekeeping the warmth inside of him. Guarding his peace.

[horansqueen]

Stuck With You - Chapter 18

Chapter 18: I Want You

🡪chapter 1  🡪chapter 2  🡪chapter 3  🡪chapter 4  🡪chapter 5  🡪chapter 6   🡪chapter 7  🡪chapter 8  🡪chapter 9  🡪chapter 10  🡪chapter 11 🡪chapter 12 🡪chapter 13 🡪chapter 14 🡪chapter 15 🡪chapter 16 🡪chapter 17

College Enemies To Lovers AU

characters // masterlist // instagrams // mood board

Any time I need to see your face I just close my eyes and I am taken to a place Where your crystal mind and magenta feelings taken shelter In the base of my spine, sweet like a chica cherry cola

I don't need to try and explain, I just hold on tight And if it happens again, I might move so slightly To the arms and the lips and the face and the human cannonball I need to, I want to

Come stand a little bit closer Breathe in and get a bit higher

Ooh, I want you I don't know if I need you But, ooh, I'd die to find out Ooh, I want you I don't know if I need you But, ooh, I'd die to find out

But a look, then a smell of perfume It's like I'm down on the floor And I don't know what I'm in for

click here to be on the update list

NIALL

                                                      My phone had been ringing and beeping constantly in the past hour. Every time I checked, though, it was a new call or message from Mandy and I was desperately trying to avoid talking to her. I knew I wouldn't be able to run away from her for too long but I was determined to at least try. I marked all her text messages as 'read' and got out of my car again, getting inside Lewis' apartment building for the second time on that day.

I felt nervous and I was not sure why, but I kept twisted the insides of my jeans pockets as the elevator moved up. My heart skipped a beat when I glanced at the spot where Devon and I kissed but I swallowed my feelings and quickly walked out of the elevator. It didn't take long for Lewis to open the door and when I walked in, I noticed he had cleaned up everything. I was impressed, especially when I remembered the mess we had made, but I didn't mention it.

"You know you don't have to come visit many times a day, mate." Lewis pointed out before his lips curled. "No need for me to get used to your ass in this apartment, your girlfriend messaged me and said it was too expensive for her."

I wanted to point out that she was not my girlfriend and never would be but the words got stuck in my throat and I decided it was better to ignore it and not fuel the fire. I took my hands off my pockets and passed one in my hair with a sigh.

"Look, Devon really needs a place to stay."

"I thought you'd be happy to keep her with you in your room." Lewis wondered with a frown.

I took a seat on the other couch, close to him and shook my head. "She wants out, okay." I explained, shaking my head slightly before sighing again and leaning my back on the couch. "I mean, she really wants to leave."

Lewis stared at me, frowning slightly more, and finally moved his upper body closer. "That's how much you love her?" he asked in a soft tone, making me shrug. "Enough to let her go?"

"Don't say stupid things."

"No, you say stupid things, Horan." he added a bit louder. "Instead to love her enough to let her go, why don't you love her enough to be honest with her? I've seen the way she's been looking at you. She's literally waiting for you to make a move."

"I've hurt her enough already okay?" I replied a bit rudely. "She wants out and if that's what she wants then that's what she'll get."

This time, Lewis didn't answer but he rolled his eyes at me, letting his back fall on the couch. "You're a fookin' idiot."

"Thanks, I know."

"You let one girl fuck you up, and then you fuck the others. Nice move." he replied again with sarcasm.

"Fine, sue me!" I let out, now getting angry. "I'm just here to ask you to send her a message again, and tell her you'll charge her half of the rent you proposed first."

Lewis raised his eyebrows at me, blinking a few times. I knew he was getting annoyed but I didn't care. "Why would I do that?"

"I'll pay you the other half." I explained, closing my eyes. "But you can't tell her! Ever."

My friend stared at me and I knew he wanted to add something about the girl that broke my heart and fucked me up to the point where I rejected any form of romantic love, but he didn't and I felt grateful for that. It's not like I was not aware that it was not a normal thing. I knew people fell in love, fucked up other people, hurt them, got their heart broken... and started all over again. Most people had this urge and this need to love and be loved, knowing they could get hurt but hoping they won't. I didn't have that need, because I felt like the happy times were not worth the pain. I couldn't lie and say Devon didn't make all my principles falter, but I was trying hard not to do to anything about it, despite how bad I was craving it... how bad I was craving her.

"Propose her a ride to school every morning." Lewis finally said, taking me out of my thoughts. I blinked a few times and frowned before shaking my head. "Seriously, do it." he continued. "If you do that, I'm good with you paying half the rent and not telling her."

I stared at him for a few seconds before looking down. I liked the idea but I was not sure she'd agree to it. I also was pretty convinced it was a bad idea. How could I stop feeling all these things for her if I spent time with her every single day? Anyway, the reason she wanted to move out of our room was because she didn't want to be around me anymore, and picking her up for school every week days sounded counterproductive.

"Why does it matter so much to you?" I finally asked, looking up at him as he got up but totally resigned to do what he asked me to do.

"Because even if you pretend the opposite, it really matters to you." Lewis confessed, making something stir in my stomach. "So, we have a deal?"

I got up too, glancing at the hand he was holding out before looking up in his eyes. I would never tell him, but if Devon agreed to let me give her a ride to school every morning, it would make my heart lighter. As much as I hated to admit it, I took so many decisions with my heart recently that there was no doubt I'd end up in deep shit very soon. Did the fact that Devon was about to move out make me change my mind? Would it turn me into the pathetic human being I was whenever she was near? The same one I used to be around my ex girlfriend right before and even after she broke my heart?

"Deal." I just let out firmly, grabbing his hand and shaking it hard once before letting it go.

"I want my money every saturday and you're the one driving here to give it to me, making it your problem."

"Ever heard of bank transfers?" I asked with a scoff.

"I want it cash."

I knew he just wanted me to come over and I understood why but I was too mentally exhausted to argue and maybe it would also give me the chance to see Devon. I should run away from here and break all the deals I had made with Lewis but I couldn't. I was tired to fight, I was tired to repress everything I was feeling in hope it would disappear.

"Okay, but you don't ask for the money in front of Devon."

"Who do you think I am? An idiot?"

I chuckled but rolled my eyes before nodding, grateful for what he was doing. It was tough to push away someone who made me feel so many things. It felt like every fiber of my body, everyone around me, and even fate and destiny made it impossible for me to stay far from Devon. I knew deep down that I couldn't stay physically away from her forever. It felt like my own body was going to rot or die if she'd stay far, and I knew it was a stupid example but those were the only words I could come up with. Perhaps it was not really that. Perhaps it was just that my heart would stop beating, but either way, I was not ready to let go. Not completely.

I wanted to thank Lewis for everything but just as I was about to, someone knocked at the door, making me jump slightly. I moved away to let Lewis pass but when I heard the voice on the other side, I felt my heart jump in my chest.

"Lewis, are you there?" Mandy's voice let out in a soft tone. "I forgot something last night!"

I placed my hand on Lewis' chest as he walked past me and looked up in his eyes, shaking my head. "I'm not here." I mouthed, making him frown and throw his hands up.

"You're gonna have to face her at some point, right now is perfect." he replied in a whisper, walking up to the door and opening it before I could think of something else to do or a good place to hide.

As soon as her eyes met mine, I pushed my hands in my pockets and her face lighted up.

"Niall, hey, tried to reach you all day!"

"Yea, sorry my.. phone was on silent." I lied, sending her a small smile. "I was about to call you back as soon as I left."

"I just feel very lonely today." she pointed out, sending me puppy eyes as she took a step closer, putting her hand on my chest. "Do you want to sleep in my room tonight?"

My eyes roamed on her face for a few seconds as she gripped my shirt. I knew looking at her should make me feel something, but nothing happened. It was not because I was used to her, or because I had had too much sex encounters with her, no. It was simply because I felt nothing for her and probably never felt anything except lust. The fact that i didn't feel any desire for her anymore was a shock and my lips parted as I blinked a few times.

"I'm busy... tonight." I cleared my throat and took a step back, turning to Lewis to hug him lightly and tell him goodbye. I could feel Mandy's eyes on my back and it suddenly made me feel uncomfortable. When I turned back to her, she raised her eyebrows and I smiled. "Do you need a ride?"

"Yea, thank you! Let me just grab my bra really quick."

I frowned, turning to Lewis who just shrugged as Mandy disappeared in the hall only to reappear a minute of two later as she pushed her bra in her purse. I didn't ask because I didn't want to know and as we left, I glanced at Lewis' phone and moved my chin in its direction. He just nodded and I followed Mandy to the elevator.

I watched as she leaned against the wall in the exact same spot Devon and I had kissed but closed my eyes as images invaded my brain, appearing behind my eyelids like a movie I could never get tired of.

"Are you okay, Niall?"

I got out of my thoughts, trying to push away the thoughts in my head where Devon was straddling me and I was kissing her lips gently after a claustrophobia crisis, to turn to Mandy. "Yea, I'm good."

We walked together until my car and I drove in silence. She put her feet up on the dashboard and I felt my lips curl into a small grimace at how annoyed it made me but when I parked, I turned to her with a serious face.

"Look, Mandy, I think we need a break."

"A break?" she let out before chucking. "Niall, we're not dating."

"I know I just.. I can't do this anymore."

She tilted her head to lean it on the bench before turning her body slightly my way. She sighed low and a sad smile appeared on her lips before she licked them. For some stupid reason, it made me think of Devon. Again.

"It's because of that girl, right?"

"No." I lied, shrugging both shoulders and looking away, making Mandy laugh.

"I didn't even name her and you knew who I was talking about." she pointed out, making me grimace again. "It's okay, Niall, I see how you two look at each other. I didn't think she was your type but hey," she shrugged. "I get it."

I stared at her for a few more seconds, just trying to process what she was saying and when I frowned, she started laughing, rolling her eyes.

"Don't make this face! What did you expect?" she asked, an amused smile spread on her lips. "It's not like I was in love with you or anything!"

Without waiting, she got out of my car and I finally did the same. We walked together near the building and when we were about to part, I turned to her and sent her an uncomfortable smile.

"So... bye?"

She laughed again, shaking her head, and took a step closer. "I'm really gonna miss your ass." she let out, pinching it and making me tense immediately. She got on her tiptoe and pressed her mouth on mine, taking me my surprise, before taking a step back and raising her eyebrows. "Bye!"

I stood there, motionless, a sensation of relief washing over me as some of the stress I wasn't even aware I had disappeared suddenly. I pushed my hands in my pockets and when I turned back to get inside, I noticed Devon not so far from me, staring at me. My lips parted and my heart dropped when I realized she had seen what had just happened with Mandy and I was tempted to tell her it was not what she was thinking but instead, I swallowed my words as she walked closer.

"Your friend Lewis messaged me." she explained, glancing in Mandy's direction before looking back in my eyes.

I looked down at her, my eyes roaming on her face and lingering a bit too long on her lips. Why couldn't I get her off my mind? Why was it so tough for me not to grab her and kiss her right here and right now?

I started thinking about my ex girlfriend and the feelings I had whenever she was near, and it made me realize how different the two emotions were. The way I loved my ex girlfriend was needy, pathetic and ugly. The way I would do anything she wanted just because I was scared she would leave, the way she made me jealous on purpose, or simply did anything she wanted without caring if it would hurt me. I fell in love with someone who used me and it was for that same person that I had given up on love. Even now, after months of her breaking my heart, she still had an impact on me. She was still controlling me without even knowing. I was letting what she did to me ruin my life and I had no idea how to get out of it.

"Oh yea?"

"Mmhm, he said he cut the rent in half, and I think I can afford it."

"Alright." I just said, sending her a small smile.

"You don't seem surprised." she asked with a frown, tilting her head.

"No I mean, I know Lewis, he's cool." I shrugged, sending her a sincerely smile that she slowly sent back.

The way Devon made me feel was different. She made me feel good in a way I was not sure I understood yet. I could relate to her, and even if she didn't talk much about herself, she still let me in, somehow, by allowing me to look at her art and tell her how it made me feel. She allowed me to kiss her whenever I wanted and push her away after, as if she was always ready to give me a chance... a chance that I never had the guts to take. I was just realizing that maybe I was wrong and she was leaving.

"Oh, by the way, one of my friends has a mattress he doesn't need, so if you're interested, I can bring it to Lewis' apartment this week?"

Her eyebrows raised and her lips curled on the right. "Really?"

"Mmhm, oh, and since you don't have a car, I propose a ride to school every morning, how's that?"

This time though, she shook her head. "No, I can't accept that."

"Come on, I drive near there every morning anyway for breakfast, so it's all good."

It was not a complete lie but it was not the whole truth either, but I didn't care.

"No really, I can't."

"So you can accept Lewis cutting half the price of the rent, and a mattress from a guy you don't know, but when it comes to accepting my rides to school, it's too much?" I asked jokingly, a bigger smile on my face.

It made her chuckle and roll her eyes. "Fine!" she gave in, making my heart jump in my chest. "But let me pay you, okay?"

"Okay, but I decide the price." I explained, taking an other step closer. Her body was so close to mine now that if I moved, It could brush against hers. "I want that painting."

"My.. my painting? The one I wanted to throw away?"

"Mmhm," I admitted, nodding gently. "I want you to sign it, and give it to me. In exchange, you get rides and breakfast every mornings of the week."

She shook her head slightly, still smiling, and brought her shoulders up, near her cheeks. It was so endearing I almost kissed her right there.

"Niall, this painting is horrible. It'll never be worth anything."

"Deal?" I asked, ignoring her short rant.

Her traits softened and I brought my hand up, running my thumb on her cheek gently. I didn't know why I was doing that, I didn't know why I felt the need to touch her. All I knew was that feeling her skin against mine brought in me a feeling I was trying so hard to suppress, and I immediately felt the need to write a song. I let my arm fall back on my side, realizing she was not smiling anymore. Her lips were parted and she just nodded very slowly.

I suddenly got scared of everything this could imply. Would I just close off again and hurt her? I knew it was a possibility. I knew I could wake up in the morning realizing my mistake and turning into the cold hearted man I was with her only a few days ago. What would happen, then?

"Okay." she whispered. "Deal."

[bytheangell]

Take Me With You

(For my @shadowhunterbingo square: Traveling | Jimon, Rated Teen, referenced alcohol but no archive warnings/other warnings) (Read on AO3) “I don’t need a bodyguard,” Simon insists. “It was one stupid letter.”

“The letter wasn’t stupid,” Jace says, already regretting his appointment to this job. “It was a death threat, by someone who’s sent multiple things to your unlisted apartment.”

“Well, no one knows where I live on the road, which is where I’ll be for the next three months,” Simon points out.

“Oh, yes, the total inability to track you from a list of cities you’re going to and the dates and times you’ll be there. You’re right, no one will ever find you that way,” Jace says, his tone dripping with sarcasm and more than a little condescending. Simon isn’t a no-name, but he isn’t famous-famous either, and Jace hoped that’d make him a little less awful to put up with than Jace’s usual high-profile assignments. So far it’s the opposite - Simon isn’t taking this seriously at all, which is somehow more frustrating than too much importance being put on minor perceived threats.

Simon sighs. “Fine.” It certainly doesn’t sound like he’s fine with it, but Jace isn’t here to argue. He’s here to do a job.

“Great,” Jace says. “You won’t even know I’m here.”

---

That ends up being a complete lie. Of course, when Jace first imagined blending into the background of Simon’s tour life he hadn’t taken into consideration the fact that Simon drove his own van, which would just be the two of them for extended periods of time.

Jace can tell that he’s putting a damper in the way Simon normally functions during his tours, mostly because he’s quiet while they drive. Then he’ll say something, start to ramble, catch himself rambling, and fall abruptly silent again in a repeating pattern.

“Sorry if I’m cramping your style,” Jace says after one of these repetitions, speaking loud enough to be heard over the music playing in the background.

“You’re not,” Simon insists.

Jace is dubious. “What would you be doing if you were alone?” Jace asks.

Simon doesn’t even hesitate before answering, “Scream-singing at the top of my lungs with the windows down. It’s like, my tried-and-true road trip routine.”

“...so do it. Don’t let me stop you,” Jace says.

“My manager hates it because he’s convinced one of these days I’ll end up losing my voice before a show. It’s probably for the best I’m not,” Simon says before falling silent again.

Jace doesn’t push it, nor does he comment when Simon starts to sing to a song that comes on about half an hour later, his voice growing louder and louder until all the windows are down and he’s shouting lyrics into the cool night air.

Jace has to fight the urge to join him. Normally he doesn’t have an issue staying focused on a job but Simon has this disarming way of making Jace want to relax around him. Somehow what he thought would be his easiest job to date continues to throw surprising complications his way.

Still, he keeps his mouth shut and enjoys Simon’s singing as they continue driving into the night.

---

Watching Simon with his fans is nerve-wracking. There’s no telling who might be a threat, not when everyone seems so down-to-earth, much like Simon himself. There aren’t any obviously obsessive fangirls and normal tells like knowing too many personal details is just the norm, with multiple people casually asking Simon about how his Bubbie Helen is doing or about the cat he left at home with Clary during his tour, or the most recent book he’s been reading and chatting about online. It’s difficult to pick out a potential stalker when everyone knows what Jace would typically consider more personal details than usual about Simon.

Jace watches these pre- and post-show encounters with a feeling more like he’s observing conversations between old friends rather than a musician and his fans, signatures and photo ops aside. Simon knows some of them by name, remembers birthdays mentioned over social media or live chats, and even recalls previous conversations. It’s impressive.

Dressed in plain clothes so he blends in with the crowd, Jace grows increasingly impressed with Simon the more time he spends with him. Plenty of people claim to be humble, but few often are in practice. Not Simon. Simon is everything he told Jace when they first met. He’s the same way with his fans that he is in private with Jace, which is the same way he is with his family and friends - Simon’s just, well, Simon, honestly and earnestly and unapologetically.

It’s refreshing. It’s also just another thing for Jace to push to the back of his mind, because he doesn’t need to like the guy - he just needs to protect him. Simon looks up from the table he’s signing CDs at and shoots Jace a beaming smile, and Jace has to actively force himself not to smile back and simply nod his head in acknowledgment instead.

“It’s an assignment, Herondale. Get your shit together,” Jace mutters to himself from the corner of the room. It’s a reminder he repeats more often over the upcoming weeks than he’s comfortable admitting.

---

“Please,” Jace begs after the first two weeks of shows. “I will pay for a better hotel. Let me pay for a better hotel.”

Simon is shaking his head in response before Jace finishes the request.

“Why?!” Jace glances critically around the room. “Do you want to get murdered in a shady motel? Just because I can keep you alive doesn’t mean we have to actively test it every night when we could have a door that doesn’t look like my 11-year-old brother could kick it in.”

“You have a brother?” Simon asks, ignoring everything else Jace said as he tosses his duffel bag (because Simon doesn’t even have a proper suitcase) onto a bed Jace feels the instinctive need to run a blacklight over.

Jace hesitates to answer because this is a job and he isn’t meant to share personal information about himself with his assignment. It’s strange because normally the people he’s tasked to protect are such self-absorbed assholes they barely spare Jace a second glance, let alone casual conversation.

He’s aware that the pause he takes after what should be a simple question is way too long when Simon frowns, brows pinching together.

“Two brothers, actually. One older, one younger, and a sister,” Jace finally decides to share. It’s all he intends on saying, not wanting to be rude and not answer at all, but when Simon brings up his own sister and keeps talking, keeps asking curious, harmless questions, Jace finds himself answering without thinking.

Simon is easy to talk to - maybe a little too easy to talk to, because the next thing they know it’s 1am and they need to be up and back on the road at 6.

“Get some sleep, Lewis,” Jace says finally, taking a few extra minutes to secure the door before doing one last perimeter sweep. When he gets back he pretends he doesn’t notice Simon, still awake, hastily close his eyes and pretend to sleep the second Jace gets back in the room.

---

After the third week, Jace insists that staying at nicer hotels is a matter of security and finally convinces Simon to pull into the parking lot of a proper hotel. One with room service instead of vending machines, plus a gym and a pool. Jace tells himself it’s a matter of security as well, and not a reaction to Simon complaining about having several nights of terrible sleep and some back and neck pain from the old, cheap mattresses.

Jace certainly doesn’t correct Simon’s assumption that this is covered in the contract when in reality Jace is fronting the extra cost himself. After all, this is as much for his own benefit as it is for Simon’s, right?

That’s what he tells himself as he opens up more around Simon as well, sharing a drink or two when Simon insists (never anything enough to impair his judgment, and only ever when they’re back in a room for the remainder of the night), telling a few more personal stories, and… flirting?

Jace isn’t sure, but occasionally when Simon impulsively runs into an ice cream shop in a new city and gets a cone for each of them, or points out a storefront display with a leather jacket he thinks Jace might like, or leans his shoulder into Jace while laughing at something sarcastic Jace says… yeah, sometimes Jace gets the feeling that Simon might actually like him.

Then Jace just as quickly tells himself that it’s just Simon being nice, because Simon is nice, and because of course Simon’s going to be on good terms with the guy he’s stuck with 24/7 for two months. Jace is working for Simon, and their relationship is strictly professional, however pleasant it may also be.

It’s that hard line Jace knows they won’t cross that allows him to continue to open up more, because Simon’s safe. He’ll never see the guy again when all of this is over.

“You’re a good person, Jace,” Simon says one night after a lengthy conversation.

“...what?” Jace isn’t expecting that.

“You know that, right?” Simon’s tone is just shy of insistent, and certainly not rhetorical.

“Why do you say that?” Jace asks instead of agreeing, because… well, because he doesn’t know that. He tries, but he’s made some shitty decisions in his past, and hurt a lot of people, intentionally or not. And Simon doesn’t even know him, so Jace really doesn’t know where this is coming from.

“Just… the way you talk about yourself sometimes. Like you always have something to prove, or make up for... or like you have to justify everything you say. Sometimes I get the feeling you don’t think very highly of yourself even when you’re acting like God’s gift to mankind,” Simon adds with more accurate insight than Jace is comfortable with.

And now Jace really doesn’t know what to do with that.

“What are you, a philosopher now?” Jace mutters, still avoiding any sort of direct commentary on Simon’s way-too-close-to-home observation. “Go to sleep, Simon. I don’t need you too tired to focus on the road tomorrow.”

Simon looks like he’s going to argue but doesn’t in the end, leaving Jace alone with his thoughts in the newly settling silence of the hotel room.

It feels surprisingly pleasant to hear those affirmations from Simon, and Jace considers for the briefest moment what it’d be like to just be friends with Simon outside of their circumstances, to have these discussions and delve deeper into both of their pasts, humoring more of Simon’s personal questions and--

--and everything he can’t let this turn into over the next few weeks. Fuck.

Maybe there’s some harm in opening up after all.

---

They’re a little over halfway through the three-month tour when Jace realizes that perhaps his harmless crush on Simon is stronger than he realized. Jace watches from his usual spot in the corner as Simon signs CDs and sells band t-shirts and poses for photos, which is what he always does. But with every flirtatious laugh and every arm Simon drapes over someone’s shoulder or wraps around someone’s waist, Jace feels the desire to pull Simon away... and it isn’t because he’s in danger. It’s because Jace is jealous.

Jace grows sullen at the realization, arms crossed in front of him as he forces himself to watch Simon with his fans, because this is his job. The more he watches the more he doesn’t even think Simon realizes he’s doing it. Jace knows what active, intentional flirting looks like, but this is just Simon being his natural charming self, and Jace isn’t sure if that makes the whole thing better or worse.

Because it starts to dawn on him with a bit more meaning now that the way Simon’s been with him is the way Simon is with everyone. Jace just gets to experience it more often than everyone else right now. That doesn’t make their conversations special. It doesn’t make Jace anything special to Simon. And hell, maybe it’s just been a while since Jace spent this much time with someone else, too. Maybe he should work on writing off his own motivations as easily as he’s writing off Simon’s because his feelings are far from professional right now.

When the crowd disperses and Jace goes to help Simon wrap up his gear and load it back into the van (something that’s become routine for them, though not strictly in Jace’s list of expected duties) Jace is quieter than usual.

“Everything alright?” Simon asks, catching the shift in mood.

“Yeah. Fine,” Jace says curtly.

Simon doesn’t look like he believes him but doesn’t press the topic as they toss the last of the equipment into the van and head out.

---

The nicer Simon is toward him, the more closed-off Jace gets. He’s quiet during dinners Simon insists on paying for, stops sharing so much about himself when they do talk, and when Simon gives Jace a guitar pick he fashioned into a necklace for him Jace pockets it with a muttered ‘thanks’ without putting it on. He doesn’t have the heart to totally push Simon away, but he can’t keep growing closer to him knowing it’s all going to end in three weeks.

Jace wears the necklace every day but he keeps it tucked underneath his shirts where Simon can’t see.

Simon eventually stops trying to talk to him entirely, and they spend more and more time in uncomfortable silences. Sometimes Simon insists he needs privacy to work on his music and Jace sits at the end of the hallway of their hotel room listening to the faded sounds of Simon’s strumming.

There are three weeks left in Jace’s assignment when he gets the call that the police managed to track the letters to a girl back in New York: she’s in custody and getting a restraining order put against her, and Jace can come back as soon as he arranges transportation.

Jace hangs up the phone feeling surprisingly upset. This is great news for Simon, and he should be happy for him if nothing else, but that means this is the last night he’ll have to spend with Simon.

The last night he’ll get to spend with Simon.

“Hey Simon, good news. I just got a call from Luke and they tracked down your mystery stalker. You’ll get all the details once you’re back home but they’re already putting the restraining order into place, so you’re good to go.”

“What? That’s amazing!” Simon grins automatically, but it falls back into a frown just as quickly. “Does that mean you…?” his words trail off in question.

“I’ll be able to leave in the morning,” Jace confirms.

“Guess you’ll be happy to get out of here,” Simon says, his smile entirely gone.

“I do miss New York,” Jace carefully avoids the answer he knows Simon’s fishing for. The lie he should give, but can’t bring himself to.

Simon looks Jace up and down, his gaze finally resting on Jace’s face for a long couple of seconds, searching for something there before turning away without another word.

---

Jace knows he shouldn’t go to the show, but he does. He hangs in the back, a real drink in hand now that he’s no longer on duty, and listens to Simon sing the songs Jace knows by heart now. Jace knows from experience standing by the side of the stage that there’s no way Simon can make out any faces where Jace currently sits back by the bar. He plans on leaving before the end, before the lights come on and Simon knows he was there.

He’s a few drinks in when he hears Simon break his usual format.

“How does everyone feel about me trying out a new song I’ve been working on?” Simon asks. The crowd claps and cheers, and Jace shifts in his seat to fully face the stage. “This is a song about feeling a connection with someone, and not knowing when things went wrong, only that they did. And wondering if maybe it was all in your head the whole time...”

Jace feels his throat tighten at those words. He doesn’t have to be a genius to piece together the lyrics Simon starts to sing, fitting them to their lives the past few months, the hope of getting to know someone you’re starting to like, the confusion of being shut out, the uncertainty of wondering if they ever felt the same way you did or if they were just humoring you.

Jace knows Simon well enough to know that this isn’t a coincidence. It can’t be.

Against his better judgment, Jace stays. He stays until the set is over and the lights come on and Simon looks out around the crowd and makes direct eye contact with him.

Because fuck it. He’s leaving in the morning, and if this is all for nothing then he’ll never see Simon again and it won’t matter. But if he’s right…

Jace hangs back, watching Simon smile and laugh and sign CDs and take photos, acutely aware of every time the musician’s eyes wander over to where Jace lingers by the bar. Outside of the fading buzz from the alcohol it almost feels normal: hanging back after the show, watching Simon and waiting for him to make his way over once the crowd disperses. Hell, even the butterflies in Jace’s stomach aren’t new.

“You’re here,” Simon says when he finally makes his way over. “I didn’t think you’d come, since… I mean…”

“I heard your new song,” Jace forces the words out before he can change his mind. “I’d say I liked it, but that seems like the wrong response from the guy who made you think you did something wrong.”

“Not everything is about you,” Simon argues, but the intent falls flat beneath the nervous tremor the words are spoken with.

“No,” Jace agrees easily. “But that song is.”

Simon hesitates, then sighs. “It is.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize for not liking me, Jace. You were doing your job, that’s-”

“No. I’m sorry I was going to leave without telling you that I like you. I thought I’d leave and you’d never see me again, that it’d be pointless to get attached. I thought you were just… being nice. Because you’re a good person.” The words spill out of Jace before he can overthink them.

“You like me,” Simon repeats incredulously. “That totally makes sense with, you know, the way you completely stopped talking to me.”

Jace can hear the anger in Simon’s voice and winces slightly. Just because it’s entirely deserved doesn’t make it easier to hear.

“I figured it’d be easier to walk away once this was all over if we weren’t as friendly.” It’s still a shitty thing to have done, and Jace wouldn’t blame Simon for holding it against him. But after hearing that song he couldn’t walk away with Simon thinking it was over anything he did wrong. No matter the cost to Jace’s pride, Simon deserves that much. “And… maybe I was a little afraid that if I got much closer I’d want to cross a line I knew I couldn’t.”

“So you felt it too?” Simon’s words and expression are full of so much hope that Jace almost panics again. What if he isn’t half the person Simon thinks he is after getting to know him in this little bubble of theirs from the past few months? What if he messes this up?

...what if he doesn’t?

“I did,” Jace finally admits. “I still do. And I know I probably ruined any chance I had before, but if I haven’t fucked things up too badly, maybe once you’re back in New York we could meet up for coffee?”

Simon smiles, brighter than the house lights that fill the small venue now.

“Or… or you could stay with me for the last few shows? I wasn’t just being nice for the sake of being nice - I like you, Jace. I changed my hotel routine for you! I wouldn’t do that for just anyone. I don’t know if you have to go back right away for work, or something, but if you don’t I definitely wouldn’t mind the company. Your company.”

Jace considers it for a few long moments, then nods. It’s fitting, he thinks, to drop the formalities and the professional distance in the same setting he started to fall for Simon in. The same setting in which Simon started to fall for him, despite Jace’s best efforts to dissuade him, only this time with no excuses to hold him back. And if Simon’s willing to give him an actual shot after everything, he’d be a fool not to take it.

“Well, I can’t very well leave you to lug all your equipment around by yourself, can I?” Jace says, smiling. “Let me check back in with the office tomorrow morning but I don’t have anything scheduled. It shouldn’t be an issue.”

There’s a pause then, the air between them filled with an almost electric buzz of anticipation. Simon takes the first step closer, bridging the gap between them. There’s no questioning what Simon’s thinking when his eyes dart down to Jace’s lips and back up to meet his gaze again before speaking.

“Can I-”

Before Simon can finish, Jace’s lips are already on his in response. It’s slow and tentative, with each of them feeling the other out, but it’s nice. It’s really nice. When they pull away after a few moments Simon can’t keep the smile off his face. “That was even better than I imagined.”

Jace quirks an eyebrow, smirking fully now. “You imagined us kissing?”

“Shut up and help me load the van.”

The familiar banter and Simon’s easy smile are such an immediate comfort for Jace that he can’t help the light laugh he gives in response. As Simon looks back at Jace it’s with an expression so soft and full of kindness that Jace knows now isn’t the same look he reserves for everyone else.

Jace knows it’s a look reserved only for him this time - and with any luck, for many more times to come.

[kooksbliss]

– finishing line || jjk

→ pairing: racer!jungkook x reader

→ genre: strangers to lovers / smut (future) / fluff (future) / street racer au!

→ word count: 6.1k

→ summary: it was a normal, ordinary night out with your best friend, or so you thought. that was before she invited you to a street race, to which you caved into and went. there you met the oh so famous, jeon jungkook. 

→ warnings: hoseok makes an appearance / explicit language / mutual pinning / jungkook makes oc a hot, shy mess / pet names / teasing / this chapter is pretty sfw 

a/n: hi hi hi! hope everyone is having an amazing day <3 this will be more than one part but i don’t think this will be a very long series (i’m thinking around five chapters max)��leave me suggestions or any ideas you would like me to write in my ask box! i’m down to do drabbles anytime, hope you all enjoy part one!!

— posted 04.15.2020

masterlist new masterlists | 01 | sneak peek of part 02 | 

You were tired; no, you were drained. Working black friday was no easy task, especially when you work in retail. You stretched your arms as you exited the employee break room after a long awaited break. Once you got back to the sales floor you went up to the cash register to clock back in from your break that’s when you heard someone scoff beside you. 

“It’s about time.” Hyuna stated. 

Hyuna is a co-worker of yours that well, happens to hate you for no reason, no reason you're aware of. She had been working with the company a little over a year before you got employed over the summer and ironically was placed to be your supervisor, meaning you had to be nice to her if you wanted to keep your job. 

“Sorry, Jaehyun needed some help with the stock.” You said as you punched your employee number into the system.

Jaehyun was also a supervisor but for the men’s department, he has been a close friend of yours since you started working here and knows about how Hyuna tends to treat you, unfortunately there's not much any of the two of you can do about it. 

“Well next time come straight out, Jaehyun is a big boy he can take care of himself. Now if you’ll excuse me I’ll be going on my break.” She said as she walked past you making sure to hit your right shoulder in the process. You looked up at the clock, thirty more minutes just thirty more minutes, you had been working for who knows how long and your feet had been begging for a rest.

Luckily since it was five in the morning there weren't too many people left in the store, but one thing you did know was that your sleeping schedule is fucked after tonight. Suddenly the chime sound from the bell that hung above the door rang out, you looked away from the clock about to greet the person who walked in, well that was until you saw who it was - to which you responded with a roll of your eyes.

“Come on don’t give me that look, y/n! You know you love me~”

“Jennie left about an hour ago, Hoseok.” 

Jennie is your best friend, you two have been friends since middle school and once her family moved next door, there was no separating the two of you. When you both graduated high school you both thought that it would be good for the both of you to have a change of scenery from the small town you lived in, that’s when you made the comment of moving out into the city, which Jennie happily agreed to. 

Jennie is from a wealthier family compared to your own she could afford going to university straight out of high school you on the other hand, didn’t have the financial support so you got this job and plan to work for another year or two before deciding on whether or not you are financially well off to go to university. She decided to move into an on-campus dorm while you found a decently well priced house, that was near your workplace and not too far from everything else, it’s been a year since you two decided to move into the city and you have loved every second of it, life was good.

“Actually I’m here for you, Jennie felt bad not being able to take you home after your shift so she asked me if I could.” Hoseok said as he walked to the side opposite of you at the checkout table.

Hoseok is Jennie’s boyfriend, they’ve been together for about eight months now and met in one of her classes freshman year. You're so glad she met him, you've never seen her happier and you know he’s good for her. As for you not being able to drive, well - a month ago some dickhead rear ended you and you’ve been waiting to see how much his insurance will cover, so you’ve been taking the bus a lot and thankfully your friends - well Jennie, has been taking you to work which is really the only place you go to outside of your house. 

“Oh, okay. Thanks Hoseok, you didn’t have to.” You said feeling bad about him having to be up at five am to take you home.

“It’s no problem, y/n! You know I’m someone you can count on.” Hoseok said as he walked around the store. “You still have thirty mintues right?”

“Yeah, sorry for making you wait.” 

“Y/n. I already said it wasn't a problem. Anyways I wanted to start my Christmas shopping early.”

As you were about to respond a lady came to the cash register.

Your shift was finally over, you clocked out and grabbed your coat from the back thankfully you didn't run into Hyuna, which is a win in your book. You caught up with Hoseok, who was waiting for you near the entrance. 

“You ready?” Hoseok asked as he looked up from his phone.

“Yep!” You exclaimed as you two left the store, looking down at his hands you noticed that he did in fact buy some things. 

Walking across the parking lot you held your coat closer to your body, the crisp November air was chilly especially in the morning. “Thank you again Hoseok.” 

“Of course, y/n. Do you want anything before we head back?”

You were hungry but, you were just too tired to put that before your sleep. “No, that’s okay I’m super tired from tonight.” Hoseok just nodded as you two reached his car, he clicked the door open and the two of you got in. It felt really nice to sit down, your legs were aching and you wanted nothing more than to lay in your bed and sleep the rest of the day away. 

The ride to your house was nice the two of you caught up and made small talk, soon you were arriving at your house. “Well, thanks for the ride! Be sure to have a safe drive back home.” 

“Of course y/n, I’ll be sure to text Jennie to tell her you made it back home safely and that I didn’t kill you.” He joked. You smiled back as you wished him a good night - well morning. Unlocking the door to your house you quickly took your shoes off and entered your bathroom where you took a quick shower, changing into your sweats and t-shirt entering your bedroom. Charging your phone you placed it on your bedside table as you laid down, sleep slowly consuming your thoughts. 

Feeling the sunlight pour into your bedroom you slowly began to wake up. Sitting up you stretch your arms up into the air and reach over to check your phone as the time reads “3:00”. You moan and groan but finally got up to do something productive for the rest of the Friday you had left. You were looking forward to the relaxing weekend you had planned ahead since you got a bit of a break from work as you didn’t have to go until Monday. 

Doing your typical morning routine you went to the kitchen to make an omelet, grabbing your phone off the counter you put your music on shuffle and started making your dish while dancing and singing along to the song.

Once you were done cooking you gave yourself a pat-on-the-back for not burning the house down. Pouring yourself a glass of juice while sitting down on the barstool you started eating your meal while scrolling down your feed liking some memes.

Ping.

You then got a message from Jennie.

You did say you wanted to be productive but really, now all you wanted to do is binge watch your show and wait for your outing with jennie.

Looking at your phone the time read “6:23” you finished the last few minutes of your show and turned off your tv and went to get ready. After you had dressed casually in booties, jeans, sweater, coat and your purse you topped your look off with light makeup. Opening the the bus app you see when the next bus would be coming and headed towards the stop near your house. 

The sun was already setting making you feel uneasy, you weren’t normally out at this time in the dark and definitely not alone. You sped up and felt your nerves calm once you reached the crowded area of the city. 

Waiting for the bus you sat on the bench and got your phone out of your pocket to check where the bus was, saying it was three minutes away.

Once the bus stopped, you got on, paid the amount and walked towards the back and sat down waiting for the stop that was closest to the restaurant. 

You arrived at the restaurant after walking about ten minutes from where the bus had left you at. You called Jennie to ask if she was already there since it was 7:15. She said that she got caught up in traffic and would be there soon and to go ahead and get a table. 

You went inside feeling your once cold cheeks warm up with the heat of the atmosphere, sounds filled your ears and the restaurant's signature dish scent reached your nose. It was busy as usual, you walked up to the main table to get a table for two, the hostess seated you in a booth towards the back. 

“WHAT?” You shouted in the middle of the restaurant causing many bystanders to give you the side eye. “Shush! Lower your voice, y/n!” Jennie whispered loudly.

Jennie had arrived around thirty minutes ago and the two of you had been chatting it up and she suddenly dropped a huge bomb on you. 

“...Wait, so Hoseok is a-”

“A street racer, yeah.” She started, “I know it sounds totally crazy and I know how you steer away from those sorts of things but, you know he’s a good guy a-and it’s been killing me not telling you.”

You stayed silent, never did you ever think that Hoseok was a racer and your mind was still trying to comprehend everything your friend was telling you. 

“And the reason why I’m telling you is because - now y/n don’t freak out or close yourself out but,” biting her bottom lip she continued, “ I wanted you to go to one of the races with me. It’s been killing me having this secret from you, and that’s only if you want to go! I’m not trying to force you either...”

You were not expecting this at all. Your friend was dating a street racer… and now she’s inviting you to one of their very much illegal races. What should you say? You want to say no you really do, it’s not your scene, plus you really just wanted to relax this weekend. 

“When is it?” You finally spoke after a good minute of silence.

“Tomorrow night.” Jennie responded, “Y/n, I just wanted to tell you about Hoseok, and he told me I should ask you if you wanted to go with us. You don’t have to say yes, and there's many more races anyways if you do decide to want to come to one.” 

You thought about what she said, and were happy that they would even think to invite you. “I’ll - I’ll think about and let you know for tomorrow if that’s alright.” 

“Yes of course y/n! Take your time. Anyways did I tell you about what my chemistry professor said yesterday? He totally was like-”

You got lost into your thoughts as you thought about what she said, normally if someone were to ask you to go to a street race you would’ve said no on the spot but for some strange reason you did want to go but you know you shouldn’t.

“Like, that’s just so rude to say and I don’t even understand why he would bring that up in the first place!” Jennie sighed.

The two of you spent the rest of the night gossiping about each of your co-workers as well as the show you were watching, but in the back of your mind you kept thinking about what she said. 

Jennie took you back home and you two wished each other goodnight. 

Walking into your house you went to your bathroom and did your nighttime routine, changed into some pjs and you promised yourself you were just going to watch two more episodes of your show. Did that happen? No, of course not. What you did however is manage to fall asleep on the couch. 

Waking up with an awful cramp in your neck you arose from the couch with a groan. “Gosh I really shouldn’t have slept on the couch.” You spoke to yourself. Today you weren’t feeling up to cook so you just had your favorite cereal and texted Jennie.

Looking down at your phone you sighed. Should you go? A part of you really wants to know about the racing scene and to see. You needed some thrill in your life and maybe this is it, this is your chance. 

You may have seemed cool, calm, and collected over text but in reality you were freaking out. You just agreed you were going to a street race in less than thirteen hours when your previous plans were to binge watch the show you’ve been watching for another season, a lot more tame for what you're now signing yourself onto. But for some reason you did want to go - it's been a long time since you've gone out anywhere else outside of your work. 

Your thoughts were racing, maybe it won't be as bad as you think it is, maybe the media just exaggerates what the reality is, maybe it’s actually super lame. You tried to make yourself feel better about your decision but you can’t help the anxious feeling inside your lower stomach.

It’s 9:49 pm and you've been staring at your closet for the last two hours, at least that’s what it felt like - it was really more like ten minutes, but still! What were you supposed to wear to these kind of things? 

You supposed wearing black is the most common thing, at least you hoped. You digged into your closet and found a pair of high waisted black joggers with vertical lines on the sides of them, a black halter, some all white sneakers and a large oversized jean jacket.  You then went to your bathroom and tried to make yourself somewhat presentable, with some light makeup and styled your hair to your liking. 

You checked your phone for the time “10:42” you felt your heart accelerate, you were excited, nervous, and anxious all at once. 

One minute soon became two, then three, and soon it was already 11:00. Your nerves were on edge. Suddenly your phone rang and you flew up three feet in the air, with shaky hands you picked up your phone Jennie’s contact lit up the screen and you answered. 

“Hey Jennie!” You said trying to sound excited to hide your nerves.

“Hey! I’m outside! Oh, and make sure to bring your ID.” 

“O-okay sure thing!” You said as you began to awkwardly laugh. You grabbed your phone and your small wallet that you slipped into the front pocket of your joggers since you didn’t want to take a purse. 

Well here goes nothing. 

After driving for what seemed like 20 minutes from your house you arrived in a secluded area where there was a pay toll like entrance and a huge line of cars wanting to go in.

“Uh, Jennie? How many people actually come to these things?” You said being genuinely surprised by how many people are lined up behind the entrance. 

“Hm. I don’t really know the exact numbers but it varies to who actually races, if they’re a fan favorite, a newbie, stuff like that.”

You supposed that made sense but still you didn’t think that there would be so many people, you’re assuming that Hoseok and his friends are fan favorite racers. 

It took 15 minutes from you two to make it to the pay toll.

“IDs?” A deep voice rang out. 

Jennie waited for you to get yours out of your wallet and then handed the man both IDs. He checked the two and looked back up at the both of you, then handed Jennie two white bands, as well as the IDs.

“Thank you.” Jennie said as the toll’s gate rose up and drove off, 

“This is so exciting! How are you feeling y/n?”

How are you feeling? You really didn’t know, it was a strange feeling that’s for sure.

“Good, just… nervous.” You softly chuckled as you looked down at your hands that you curled on your lap.

“That’s totally understandable, I was too when I came to see the first race. I wanted to be a supportive girlfriend but I actually ended up liking it.” Jennie said as the two of you arrived at a graveled parking lot, there were cars parked everywhere and you could hear the distant sound of people talking and the car's engines.

“Here you’ll need to put this on.” Jennie said as she put the white band on your wrist and you did the same for her. 

“Thanks.” You said as the two of you got out of the car.

The cold crisp air nipped at your cheeks as soon as you got out. You hugged the jacket closer to your body and met up with Jennie on the other side of the car.

“Okay! Let’s go!” Jennie said as she looped her arm around yours.

After walking for about four minutes you reached a huge crowd of people, once you two had successfully made it past the crowd you could now see the large narrow street that disappeared into the distance.

Jennie then started walking towards the left where there were a lot less people, and stood two large men in front of a pathway.

“Uh, Jennie?” You said as you cuddled closer to her - what is she doing?

“I’m with Hoseok.” Jennie ignored your questioning and spoke to the men.

“What’s the code?” Said the man on the right. Jennie then whispered what you assumed to be the code to one of the men, they both looked at each other and spread apart making room for the two of you to continue walking on the pathway. 

“Uh, what was that about? Where are we even going?” You asked Jennie once you two were a good distance from the men.

“Sorry if that freaked you out, but basically where we are going is like the VIP area for the racers and those are the bodyguards, the racers are the only ones that know the code but they can tell people too, which is why I know it because of Hoseok.” Jennie said as you two approahed two buildings, one was like an open pit stop area for the cars and the other was like a clubhouse - they really take this street racing seriously huh?

“Oh, I see. So do all the racers hang out over here?” You said as you started hearing the sounds of people getting louder and louder. 

“Yep! Hoseok is probably in his car now, getting ready for his race against Jungkook.” 

Jungkook? That name was unfamiliar to you. 

“Who’s Jungkook?” You said a bit confused.

“Oh! That’s right I forget that you don't know him, well you can meet him after the race,” She said pulling her phone out checking the time, “It’s already 12:27? The race starts in three minutes!” Jennie exclaimed and grabbed your arm taking you to the pit stop area. 

Entering the pit stop area there were a lot of people inside making the once quiet outdoors loud with excitement. You then noticed that each of the racers had their own separate rooms and the people inside were either the guests or the actual pit crew of the racer, well it’s good to know they actually have proper protection and safety. 

The racers had a gold plaque above the open room that they were in, Hoseok’s was the fourth room and you happened to notice that Jungkook’s was right next to Hoseok’s. 

“Come on y/n it’s about to start, I’m so excited!!” Jennie pulled your arm onto a couch that was placed in Hoseok’s room. A loud engine sound rang out making you jump up in your seat, it sounded so close you didn’t realise how close you actually were to the street. 

The cars were not in your view of distance yet but you could hear just how close they were, then you saw two cars one red and one black stop right in front of the room you were in. 

Out of nowhere a very slim, tall girl dressed in basically swimwear and heels holding two flags stood in the middle of the two cars, just seeing what she was dressed in made you shiver. An abrupt voice from an intercom then broke the silence.

“Welcome, welcome ladies and gentlemen, hope everyone is doing well on this cool November night. Tonight’s race is a treat for all of you, we got two of our hottest, favorite racers but I’m sure the lot of you already know that. These two don’t need any sort of introduction, of course I’m talking about Jung Hoseok-” the crowd roared out, cheers and screams rang, you felt your eardrums were going to burst. “And Jeon Jungkook.” If possible you heard the crowd scream even louder. 

“Now, let’s get this race started shall we?” The intercomer’s voice faded out and the girl lifted the two flags, “three, two, one!” She said as she lowered the flags. 

The two cars then accelerated passed her, you got up from the couch and moved to the opening of the room and saw the two cars faintly in the distance.

“They go super fast don’t they? I think Hoseok said something about going 130 mph.” That actually scared you - the fast you’ve ever gone was like 90.

“Dang, and how long does it take for them to come back?” You said as you looked down at the black and white checkered finish line that was a couple feet away from you. 

“Hm, it depends really but it usually takes eight to ten minutes. But in the meantime I like getting some snacks while I wait.” She said turning around to go to the popcorn machine that was next to the couch.

You were still looking towards the distance when you happened to look over to Jungkook’s room, there were at least five girls inside, one of which made eye contact with you and flipped you off, you quickly looked away and met up with Jennie again on the couch.

“So uh, this Jungkook guy? He seems to be a ladies man.” You said while reaching over to steal some of her popcorn.

“Hey! Well yeah, he most definitely is. Why do you ask?” Jennie’s eyes suddenly lit up as she smirked, “Y/n are you trying to get laid? I mean I thought you would be one to wait but I mean Jungkook probably wouldn’t mind fucking a virg-”

“Woah, woah Jennie!” You say as your cheeks and ears start getting red. “N-no well I - well for one I’m not a virgin! And two I asked because when I happened to look over to his room there were a lot of girls but also this one girl gave me her middle finger!” You said in almost a pouty matter. 

“Wait, you’re not a virgin? Not that it’s a bad thing if you are but, you never told me that you lost your virginity.” Jennie said a bit surprised and honestly you don’t blame her. Anyone who knows you probably thinks you haven't got a freaky bone in your body. “But as far as the girl who flipped you off - that was probably Lisa for some reason she thinks that her and Jungkook are together when he himself has made it clear that he’s not into her in that way. She even got jealous of me before she found out I was with Hoseok and not Jungkook.” 

“Oh, then maybe that’s why she flipped me off, but I don’t even know him. A-and about that I uh, lost it the night of junior prom with my date.” You said looking anywhere but her, for some reason you always get shy talking about sexual things, also you didn’t see the hype around it your first time wasn’t as magical as you thought it would have been and people hyped sex up so much you just thought it would be different, you didn’t even climax!

“Oh well maybe you can tell me about it at a better time-” The sound cars’ engines could be heard again and Jennie jumped up. 

“Come on! Let’s see who’s in the lead!” Grabbing your arm the two of you stepped into the open area of the room to where you can see the cars in the distance but on the opposite of which they started. The black car seemed to be the one in the lead but not by much.

In a matter of seconds it seemed, the two cars then passed the finish line, but it was so close that neither you or Jennie could tell who won.

“Well, well, well ladies and gentlemen it seems that this race was indeed a close one, but winning by three seconds more, Jeon Jungkook won tonight’s race. Be sure to stick around to see your favorite racers, that’s all for tonight folks have a good night.” The intercomer wished his goodnights and what was left was the cheers from the crowd. 

The sound of the car door opening reverted your attention to the two racers, Hoseok was the first one to come out of the red one, that meant that Jungkook’s was the black one. You and Jennie waved over to Hoseok as he smiled and waved back.

You looked over to the black car once again only to see the girls you saw in the room along with Lisa were swarming him before he even got a chance to get out. Then you heard the car door opening and you felt the world stop.

Jungkook removed his helmet as he flashed a smile and one of the girls, the one you were told was Lisa then wrapped her arms around him. Then you felt your heart in your throat, he looked at you at least you think he looked at you, regardless you blushed and looked away from what seemed to be his stare directed towards you. 

Hoseok then came up to Jennie and kissed her, “Honey, that was a close good race, but you did good.” Jennie said with a smile.

“Thank you, baby.” He said as he leaned back down to plant another kiss on her lips. You felt so awkward, it was like you were third wheeling, you just looked at the ground trying not to make eye contact with your best friend’s makeout session.

“Okay, okay we get it lovebirds.” An unfamiliar voice said, causing you to look up.

And there he was. Jungkook was absolutely breathtaking, you never thought that someone could look this good close up. You were so mesmerized that you didn’t realize you were staring.

“Didn’t your parents ever tell you it was rude to stare, sweetheart?” Jungkook said to you to which you didn’t even reply until you felt Jennie’s and Hoseok’s eyes on you too.

“O-oh I’m sorry.” You said looking down, this is why you don’t go out, you just don’t fit in. You were jizzing your pants just looking at the man who doesn’t want anything to do with you, or even knows your name as a matter of fact. 

“Aw, sweetie that’s alright. No need to get all shy on me, I don’t bite unless-”  

“Jungkooookie!~” Lisa ran up to the group cutting off whatever Jungkook was going to say and hung onto him, “That was such a good race! I knew you would win, no offense Hoseok.” 

“Yeah, none take-” Hoseok started but Lisa, you supposed has a habit of cutting people off.

“So Jungkookie, do you want to go out for dinner with me? It can be a celebratory thing, I even have dessert for you whenever we get to your place.” She said as she sent a wink his way. You could only imagine what she meant making your face red with the thought.

“Actually I might have to cancel-” He answered, removing her arms around his torso. “I was thinking about going with Hoseok, Jennie and-” He paused looking to you. “What’s your name sweetheart, I’ve never seen you around here?” 

You felt your heart stuck in your throat anytime he would even breathe in your direction, the more seconds passed the more you felt yourself grow hot.

“I-it’s y/n.” You said as you mentally slapped yourself for stuttering. “And uh, it’s my first time to a race.”

Jungkook hummed. “Ah, I see. What a pretty name for such a pretty girl.” He said with such sincerity, looking straight into your eyes. You really thought you were going to faint, was he really saying this to you? 

“You're joking. Jungkook, there’s no way you would rather go with them, her, rather than going with me?” He didn’t answer but instead kept staring at you, while you just stared back with wide eyes. 

“Jungkook!” He finally tugged his eyes away from you as Lisa exclaimed and pulled onto his arm.

“Actually I think I would, and I will. Maybe another time hm?” Jungkook said as he looked over to Hoseok. “What do you say? Want to treat me to a celebratory dinner, loser.” He said in a joking matter directed to Hoseok.

“Since you won and I’m such a good friend, I’ll treat you for tonight.” Hoseok said.

“Great-” Jungkook started, “You’re coming right y/n?”

“O-oh I don’t - it’s late a-and-” 

“She’d love to, Jungkook.” Jennie jumped in, you gave her “the look” to which she ignored. “What? Come on, you were taking some of my popcorn earlier, surely you're hungry.”

She was right you were hungry but just thinking about being in a room with Jungkook made you already want to die in a hole from embarrassment, you don't even know the guy and he has such an impact on you. 

“Fine, fine. I’ll go too.” You said still looking at Jennie missing the way Jungkook’s eyes lit up. 

“Uh, what about me Jungkookie? I thoug-” Lisa started, 

“Actually Lisa, can we have a rain check? I want to spend some time with my friends.” 

“Ugh, whatever. You know where to find me when reality hits you.” Lisa said looking at you as she rolled her eyes and walked away with a huff.

“Sounds good, let’s all meet at the restaurant. Jungkook you drove here right?” Jennie asked.

“I did, I drove Hoseok here as well.” Jungkook answered. 

“Hm, well Hoseok can come with me and, y/n, why don’t you go with Jungkook?”

Your eyes almost just shot out of your eyes, was she serious? You’d rather go with them and feel like a third-wheel rather than go in a vehicle alone, with him. You could already see it, you making a fool of yourself.

You felt everyone’s eyes on you as they awaited your response. But you didn’t want to be rude and it’s just a 20 minute car ride, it won’t be that bad, at least you hoped. 

“Uh, yeah sure, if he doesn’t mind.” You said looking over to him only finding him already looking at you. You felt your heart rate increase, something about how he looks at you makes you feel strange, and you couldn’t tell if that was a good or bad thing.

“Of course I don’t mind babygirl.” He saids with a slight smirk walking towards you whereas you felt yourself heat up with the pet name. “Now, shall we?” 

The walk to Jungkook’s car was short and quiet, maybe he came to the earth revolving revelation that you really weren’t that special and that he’s wasting his time. Being captivated in your thoughts you didn’t even notice that Jungkook, who was beside you, stopped walking.

“Woah, woah babygirl, are you already trying to escape?” Jungkook said with a chuckle. 

“Huh?” You turned around with a confused expression painted onto your face. You then noticed that he stopped at a parked car with keys in his hands. “W-well how was I supposed to know this was your car!” You said walk towards his car.

Jungkook put his hands up against his chest as a surrender, “Yes, you’re right, my fault.” Walking to the other side of the car you open the door still very nervous due to the fact that you’re about to be in a confined space with him.

Whipping around to put your seatbelt on, you felt your phone vibrate, causing you to accidentally drop it in the cup holder between the two of you. Reaching over to get your phone, Jungkook did the same thing causing the two of you to rub your hands against each other. “S-sorry.” You said as you pulled your hand away, still feeling his hand lingering next to yours, it’s almost scary how your body reacts towards him. Man you really needed to get laid again. 

“No worries it is your phone after all.” Jungkook said as he held your phone up, he didn’t mean to look down at your phone but he just happened to, “Hm, who’s Kyle?” Kyle… Kyle??! Why is he messaging you, you grabbed the phone out of his hand and looked down at the message. Just a simple “Hey” was displayed on your screen, why is he messaging you after all these years?

“Oh, he’s nobody just someone I went to high school prom with, I really don’t know why he’s messaging me.” You said as you looked down confused at your phone, but decided not to respond. 

“So do you know where we’re going?” Jungkook rang out, “Oh! Not yet but let me text Jennie.” You responded. As you waited for her response you felt this awkward tension as you looked at the plain grassy field in front of you. “So, uh Jungkook?” You said turning to look towards him, “What got you into racing?”

“Hm, we haven’t even gone out and you’re already asking for my life’s story?” You suddenly felt super invasive, “Sorry I didn’t mean to seem nosy.” You said as you look away, staring back towards the field. You felt cold fingertips graze the side of your right cheek as Jungkook turned you to look towards him. “You didn’t babygirl, I just- don’t really like to talk about it.” He said as he stares at you, you begin to blush, surely he could feel it as his hands are gripping your face. You felt electric, you never met someone that had such an effect on you and you didn’t really know why. You knew you really have, but you just couldn’t resist as your eyes moved down from his eyes and onto his lips, he must have seen this as he then began to move towards you.

“J-jungkook…” He stops moving and just stares into you, removing his hands away. Jungkook cleared his throat looking straight on as you stayed in the same position, shocked. You almost just kissed a man you didn’t even know, it’s strange - you don’t even know him yet it feels so right being with him. Maybe it was only you that felt this way but you could have sworn you could see a rosy hue on his cheeks. 

Ping. 

You felt your phone vibrate as you got another message, this time from Jennie.  

You choked on your own spit as you read the message in your head, you were going to kill her.

“Woah, what’s wrong are you okay?” Jungkook said as he looked over to you, “Y-yeah uh, Jennie said that something came up so it’s just us two, y-you can just drop me off if you like. We don’t have to do anything-”

“Y/n. It’s fine, I don’t mind, really.” He said as he put the car in reverse, “Now, let’s go get something to eat babygirl.” 

taglist: @krystle1990, @lurkerarmy​, @olivialovemason88​ @eclivpses @hinawariinoue97 @chimshoe95​ — (let me know if you would like to be added!)

© kooksbliss - all rights reserved

[harryssunflowerkiwi]

‘KIWI’ Part 1.

Pairing: Harry Styles x Female Reader

Synopsis: You’re a famous designer. You meet Harry at a party and he is obsessed, but you’re not going to give in so easily.

Word Count: 3.7K

Warnings: Not much for this part! Some sexual undertones.

A/N: hello loves! This is my first fanfic ever and I’m writing it on my phone so please bare with me. If there are any grammar or spelling mistakes I apologize, I will do my best! There will also likely be smut in the next part! And please keep in mind that this is PURE FICTION and is in no way an accurate depiction of Harry Styles! It’s just for entertainment purposes only :) So without further disclaimers, let’s get into part one of a multipart series called ‘KIWI’ very loosely based on Harry’s song. I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think and be kind xox

🥝Outfits mentioned in this part 🥝

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SEPTEMBER 3rd 2020~

You woke up to the sound of ‘dreams’ by Fleetwood Mac blaring from your phone that sat on the glass night stand beside your bed indicating that it was indeed already 6:30AM and therefor the time for you to leave your oh-so comfortable bed. The sun was shining ever so slightly through the crack between the black silk curtains that hung over the large window directly across from your bed, stinging your barely awake eyes. With a bit of hesitation you rolled over to turn off the alarm and swung your bare feet over the side of the bed letting them touch the cold hardwood floor of your bedroom. You made your way to the on suit to pee and brush your teeth. As the icy mint of your toothpaste hit your tounge you looked in the large mirror above the sink, you look tired. Of course you look tired, you’ve been getting three hours of sleep every night for the past month. Your hair is disheveled, no doubt from whoever you had kicked out of your apartment the night before after yet another hookup. You didn’t regret it, of course, you never do. He was a nice guy. Well, he was a decent lay at the very least. And he seemed to enjoy himself too so there’s no harm.

Just as you finished washing your face you heard your phone go off again. “Of course” you thought as you slowly made your way back into your bedroom where you had lazily threw your phone back on your bed before going to bathroom. You picked it up and squinted your eyes slightly to make out the name of the person calling. ‘JEFF AZOFF’. You sighed lightly and pressed answer.

“Jeff It’s not even 7” you said in a somewhat faux dramatic tone.

“oh stop y/n I know you’ve been awake for a bit” he replied and you could practically hear the smirk in his voice.

“What do you want” you sat back down on your bed and placed your left hand under your chin.

“I’m throwing a party at our place tonight and there’s no party without you”. You thought for a minute, knowing you couldn’t actually say no to a party, especially one being thrown by one of your best friends and his fiancé.

After about 30 seconds of silence you signed dramatically and said “You’re absolutely right, I’ll be there at 10 but next time tell me ahead of time. You are aware I have a business to run”.

Most of the morning was spent working through some designs, yelling at people for doing their jobs incorrectly, finalizing some details for London fashion week, and drinking copious amounts of coffee. You stood up from your “desk” (which was really just your kitchen island) with a stretch and looked down at your phone that was sitting on the counter, it was 8:43PM. Deciding that you should probably start getting ready for Jeff’s party, you walked back through your bedroom and into your walk-in closet to pick an outfit. “Alexa play get ready playlist” you yelled through your apartment and shortly after ‘girls in the hood’ started playing through out your apartment at full volume. Fully aware that Jeff’s spontaneous parties are generally pretty casual, after about 10 minutes you landed on your favourite pair of black Levi’s, a baby t that says “nobody’s pussycat”, a pair of black Gucci boots and grabbed your new fuzzy yellow and blue jumper in case you got cold (and also to throw over your shoulders for a bit of colour). Walking back into your bathroom you decided to do your makeup, since you had been working from home today and hadn’t put any on yet. You ended up doing some simple makeup, to not clash with the bright colors on your jumper and let your hair fall in loose curls. By the time you were fully ready it was just past 9:30, which was perfect because Jeff’s place was about a 20 minute drive from your apartment. You put your boots on, grabbed your yellow tinted Gucci glasses, your phone and keys and headed out.

Harry had gotten a very similar from Jeff as you, but it had come the day before. He was excited for the party, it’s been awhile since he’s been out anywhere but the studio. He’s been working on his new album tirelessly. Writing songs this time round was becoming increasingly more difficult, he’s felt dry of inspiration which is partially what he’s hoping a party will help with. Being around some new people and some of his closest friends. Jeff told him he was inviting some of his mates that Harry was yet to meet, which hopefully meant new experience outside the realm of ex girlfriends and band mates. He told Jeff he wouldn’t make it till around 11PM considering he’d be in the studio until 9 and he’d need time to make it home to change and shower before heading over and London traffic was an absolute nightmare, especially on Friday’s. Once he was done at the studio it was half nine, he sighed heavily as he left the lofty studio feeling the heavy weight of the pressure to write new material.

Once Harry arrived to his flat he immediately dropped his keys into the white and blue ceramic bowl he keeps by the door and swiftly kicked off his worn out vans. He was tired, but determined to make some worthy memories if not only for the sake of his future albums. Hell, maybe even just to blow off some steam. He needed that, badly. After making his way up the long spiral shaped stained oak stairs he walked briskly into the bathroom right across from his bedroom. He took his phone out of the back pocket of the light brown sweats he was wearing and glanced at the time 10:03PM. He let out another light sigh before hopping into the large black tiled shower. After a very quick shower filled with worried thoughts of where his career will go if he can’t write music, he hurried himself into his walk in closet with just a blush pink towel wrapped loosely around his hips and his phone in his left hand. Since he was already running slightly behind schedule and Jeff didn’t mention this party being anything but a casual gathering, he grabbed a pair of light blue YSL trousers and a simple white button down blouse to pair with his oh so worn down white vans, simply not having time to fuss about picking a new pair of shoes to match.

By the time Harry arrived at Jeff and Glenne’s flat it was five minutes to eleven. When he pulled up there were already around 10 cars parked around the house, some of which he recognized of course. He made his way up to the large front door after thanking his driver and knocked loudly, his various rings making a light clinking noise against the wood. About thirty seconds later the heavy door swung open to reveal Glenne who smiled widely when she saw him. “H!” She shrieked and pulled him in for a quick hug as she pulled him into the warm house.

“How’re ya Glenne” he smiled back enthusiastically as they entered.

“Good, good!, come let’s find Jeff and get you a drink” she said over the somewhat loud music that ran throughout the house. As Glenne guided him through the farmiliar house he took a moment to observe the people around him as they passed, seeing plenty of people that he knew well, a few he had met on a few occasions similar to this one, and some whom he’s never met. All together there were around 20 people, from what he could tell in passing.

Once they made it through each room of the well decorated house and into the bar area near the kitchen and dining area, he immediately saw Jeff leaning against the wall directly across from the doorway to the area. He was talking to a couple he recognized as Cathrine and Fred, two of their mutual friends, both worked in the music industry (Catherine being a well established sound engineer and Fred being one of the best producers in London). As they approached Jeff looked up and smiled excitedly at Harry and quickly pulled him in for a warm embrace. “Good t’ see you” Harry said as he smiled against his shoulder.

“Good to see you too H, glad you came. Nice to see you outside of that studio” Jeff replied with a small chuckle as they pulled away.

You had been at the party a total of fifty minutes and managed to down 3 vodka martinis and a glass of champagne without hesitation. You have always been able to hold your liquor, even though you didn’t usually drink more than twice a week. Not that much, you thought. Currently you were sitting on one of the two bright red sofas that sat Jeff and Glenne’s living room. You sat back against the velvet upholstery and had your left leg swung over yours and Glenne’s mutual friend Kassandra (or kassie as you called her).

You felt good, great even. It had been over 9 months since you had last seen any of these people. You had been living back and forth between New York City and London basically your whole adult life and just got back to London three days ago after being away for the most of the year. You were overjoyed to be back. You and Kassie were the only ones sitting on the couch to the right of the room, with a few others scattered throughout the living room. Some were standing and giggling by the fireplace, sipping on something strong you assumed based on how loudly they were conversing. There was a slightly less intoxicated couple sitting on the couch opposite of Kassie and yourself. You knew them well enough, although last time you saw them they were nothing more that friends and now they are very clearly together romantically. You didn’t mind though, not at all. You didn’t mind the noise, the increasingly drunker strangers and friends that passed through, you didn’t even mind the already almost-blackout strangers who thought they knew you and engulfed you in a rather tight hug. You felt relaxed and at home, as you always did when around Jeff and Glenne.

After about fifteen minutes of Jeff chatting Harry’s ear off about how excited he and Glenne were to be getting married, Glenne grabbed Harry’s arm. “Oh my god! H, I haven’t even introduced you to everyone yet have I?” She asked enthusiastically.

“I don’t believe you ‘ave” he replied with a small chuckle as he ran his free hand through his rapidly growing curls.

Before he knew it Glenne was guiding him through the house introducing him to a few people he hadn’t met yet. As they made their way into the living room he saw two girls sipping on what looked like martinis sitting on one of the couches. The two women were partially intertwined. One of them stood out though, almost like she controlled the room without even speaking. Harry stared at her, barely listening to Glenne talking beside him. She was incredibly beautiful, he thought. Her eyes and hands were effortlessly working together to capture everyone’s attention without even speaking. She wore a confidence he hadn’t seen before, even with his vast experience with super models and other celebrities alike. She looked like a royal, even in casual attire. He stood there, in the doorway completely stunned and rather confused as to why on earth he had never met her before.

“Earth to H?” Glenne said as she overdramatically waved her left hand in front of his face.

“Oh, um.. sorry, what were ya sayin’?” He replied as he quickly moved his gaze away from the stunning girl and back to his friend.

“Nevermind, cmon I need to indroduce you to Y/N and Kassie.” She mumbled quickly as she pulled him by his hand towards the very girl he was gawking at just moments before.

In the middle of Kassie making a dad joke in classic Kassie form, you spot Glenne walking over to where you are sitting rather excitedly with someone you immediately recognize as Harry Styles. Of course you knew who he was, and that Jeff was his manager and friend but you never had the chance to actually meet him. With both your schedules being as intense and unpredictable as they were it just never happened. You were a fan of his music, he is a very talented man but you definitely didn’t consider yourself a “stan”.

As they approached, Glenne turned to Harry and said “H, this is kassie!” As she pointed at her.

“Kassie works for Universal. Kassie this is Harry” she continued.

“S’ nice to meet you, Kassie” Harry said with a polite smile as he bent over to shake her hand lightly.

“And this” Glenne started as she turned her attention onto you. “Is one of my best friends, y/n! She’s the designer for KIWI” she finished with a smirk and a quick pat on your knee.

“Designer and founder actually love” You said as you glanced at Harry.

You extended your right arm out for him to shake and said “lovely to meet you, Harry. I’m y/n”. He seemed nervous which made you smirk a little. You thought it was cute.

As you placed your much smaller hand in his large ring clad one he responded with “S’ lovely to meet you too y/n. Big fan of your work”. His hand was a little sweaty but very strong and the shake itself was demanding which you liked.

Harry didn’t like how nervous he was talking to you, he’s not usually so anxious to speak to beautiful women. But, something about your incredibly strong eye contact and the way you said his name made his knees want to give out. He hadn’t lied when he said he is a fan of yours, he genuinely is. He loves your designs. Your ability to create pieces he’d never seen before, pieces completely out of the norm yet so easily fashionable was astounding to him. He had even worn some of your designs on tour and for a few interviews.

You took a sip of the martini that you held delicately in your right hand with a small hum in appreciation for his compliment. “M’ a fan of yours also, fine line is great” you reply as you glance down at your glass to find it empty. Harry takes a moment to revel in the fact that you enjoyed his latest work, before seeing your empty glass.

“Let me get ya’ a drink” he blurted out, not wanting the conversation to end.

“Mm I’ll come with” you agreed with a smile. Harry grabbed your hand again to help you up off the couch and away from Kassie who was now giggling with Glenne about something.

Harry keeps your hand in his as he guides you towards the bar. Once the two of you approach the bar he reaches for the glass in your hand and asks “what would ye like?”. You move your glance away from his and over to the large bar.

“I think we should do shots” you say with a big smile that makes Harry’s heart beat just a bit quicker.

“Shots it is then, love” he says with a small chuckle as he puts your dirty glass down and grabs two clear glass shot glasses.

“What liquor are we thinkin’?” He asked as he looks over the options.

“Oooh tequila for sure” you say confidently as you point at the bottle of expensive tequila.

“Mmm great choice” he praises as he grabs the bottle and proceeds to pour you each a shot.

“Cheers” you smirk as you grab your shot glass and clink it against the one in his hand. You make eye contact again as you down the shots in sync. As you lower your now empty shot glasses you realize how close you are to him, only about a foot and a half. Being this close to him makes you realize how handsome he is, his eyes are incredibly green and his shoulders are perfectly wide. His chocolate coloured curls sat harmoniously atop his head, one piece falling in front of his face seemingly by accident but it looked as it is meant to be there.

As Harry brought his shot glass away from his mouth and felt the strong burning sensation of the tequila making its way down his throat he stared at you. You’re eyes ostensibly checking him out, or atleast that’s what he convinced himself you were doing. In fact the combination of the warmth he felt in his stomach from the strong liquor and the minimal proximity between you and him was making him feel slightly dizzy. You truly were the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. He wanted to know everything about you, where you were born, your passions, your worst fears, what makes you wet, what makes you angry, who you care about. Literally anything and everything you were willing to tell him he was more than happy to hear about.

“How’d you know Jeff and Glenne?” Harry finally asked. You smiled as you thought about how you met them.

“Jeff and I have been friends since collage, and I met G about a year after we graduated. I indroduced them actually” you explained as your smile grew at the fond memories.

“Jeff manages you right?” you asked as you turned back to the bar and started making yourself another gin martini. Harry nodded as he watched you

“yeah e’ does, but we’re great mates too. A’ve been since before he started managing meh” he said as he turned towards you a bit more

“s’ crazy we a’vent met before this” he continued as you finished making your drink.

“It is, a shame really” you smirked. “If you’ll excuse me, I’m off to powder room” you took another sip of your drink as you began to walk away.

Harry watched you walk away, shamelessly staring at your bum and god was it nice. He was stunned to be quite frank. He wasn’t completely sure what it was about you (other than the obvious of course) that made him so enamoured by you but he couldn’t help it. He ran his hands over his face and let out a huff. Looking around and taking in his surroundings properly for the first time since he laid eyes on you, he noticed less people were there. He decided he’d find Jeff so he could more subtly wait for you to return.

When you come out of the bathroom you look around and notice there are seemingly only a few people left at the party. You grab your phone out of the back pocket of your jeans to check the time, the screen illuminates and shows 1:37AM. You let out a small huff, put your phone back in your pocket and decide to go find Jeff. You walk down the hall from the bathroom and into the living room to find Jeff and Glenne sitting on the couch you were sat at earlier. Beside them was Kassie and sat on the couch directly adjacent from them was Harry and a man you’d never met before.

“Hi loves” you say as you strut over to sit next to the man you’d never met. “Don’t believe we’ve met, I’m y/n” you say confidently with a smile and extend your hand for him to shake, which he does.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Mitch. I’m Harry’s guitarist” he says with a slightly awkward smile.

“Oh lovely” you nod. “Y/n is the designer for KIWI, Mitch” Harry says as he tilts his head forward a bit to look at you over where Mitch is sitting in between the two of you. You giggle slightly at the sudden interruption.

“Oh! That’s sick. We all love your work” Mitch says with an even bigger smile as he looks at you again.

“Thank you” you reply as you smile back at him just as enthusiastically.

“H is pretty much obsessed really, pretty sure he bought out most of your fall collection” Mitch gushes as he nudges his head towards Harry slightly. Harry gives Mitch a bit of a menacing look as he feels his cheeks heat up.

“Mmm obsessed is he?” You smirk as you move your glance back to Harry and take a long sip of your drink.

“Anybody who isn’t would be ‘ave to be blind, love” Harry said as his lips turned up into a smile, showing off his infamous dimples.

Just as you were about to reply to Harry’s bold compliment you heard Kassie let out a loud yawn from across the other couch. You turned your attention towards her as she said “think I’m gonna head out guys, it’s getting late”. She got up and Jeff and Glenne did as well. Kassie gave Jeff a hug.

“Think I’ll be going also, I haven’t watered my cactus since yesterday” you giggled as you walked over to hug Glenne and say your goodbyes. As soon as you let go of your embrace you noticed Harry was stood directly beside you.

“I’ll walk you t’ the door” Harry insisted and you nodded, following him to the front door.

“Love you Jeff! Love you G!” You yelled behind you.

Once stood in the entry way with Harry he said “really was lovely t’ meet ya”. You smiled and gave him a short hug.

“was lovely to meet you too Harry, thanks for havin a shot with me”. You went to grab the door handle to leave but Harry stopped you by grabbing your wrist lightly.

“Do ya think I could get ya numba’?” He asked as your gaze met his yet again.

You hummed in faux thought “now where’s the fun in that, love” you replied with a smirk as you turned back around, releasing your wrist from his grasp, opened the door and left.