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bucksaiga · 4 months ago

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I didn’t know I wanted you (Until I couldn’t have you)

Part 4/5 (master list)

“Buck?” Eddie called out to a very distracted Buck. “Something wrong? You’ve been looking at your phone all night.”

“I-I’m always on my phone.” Buck nervously laughed.

“Sometimes…” Eddie nodded. “But not this much. Did you find a substack or something?”

“Uh…yeah.” Buck lied. “Just doing some deep diving.”

Eddie snickered in response, shaking his head. “Of course you did.”

Actually, Buck was checking his phone waiting to hear from Tommy about his date.

As the night went on and it was nearly midnight, Buck assumed the date went really well and Tommy took this mystery person home, or vice versa.

The following morning, Buck didn’t bother to text Tommy and told himself he’s probably sleeping in or spending time with his date.

When Tommy finally texted back, Buck unlocked his phone within seconds, eager to read the text.

He…? Not that Tommy needed to come out to Buck, because Buck’s cool. Totally cool. He’s an ally. He has queer friends. It shouldn’t even be a big deal that Tommy’s revealing this information to him.

Oh God I hope that didn’t sound too forward.

Tommy took Buck to a taco bar and Buck asked about his date, trying not to sound like he was prying for information.

Tommy’s responses were brief and vague.

Guy’s name is Edgar. He’s 42. Works in accounting. Loves the outdoors and mountain biking.

He sounds boring. Buck thought. But he liked all the stuff Tommy liked. He was even a trained pilot and he knew some Muay Thai.

Maybe he’s more interesting than me. Buck negatively thought.

“S-so you guys are gonna go hiking?”

“Yeah, I was thinking of taking him up the trail we went to. I know it pretty well and it seems like a great spot to go.”

Buck felt like his heart exploded in his chest. He felt like his soul was going to leave his body. Even death would have been kinder than this. “O-oh yeah? That’s cool. He’ll love it.” Buck forced out with a fake smile.

Tommy nodded. “Hope so.”

“Yeah, it’ll be pretty romantic. Especially if you end your hike by the picnic area an hour before sunset, when the sun is low and it creates this nice warm light. They-they call it the golden hour because the sun, it—it’s golden with a warm, reddish—“ Buck laughed to himself. “Sorry I know it’s your date, I-I was just—“

Tommy shot buck a fond smile. “I think that might be a little too romantic for a second date. We’re still getting to know each other.”

“Oh—ah—yeah. Y-you’re right.” Buck nervously chuckled. “I guess so.”

Sure, it was just the very beginning of their dating stage, but it felt like the end of the world for Buck, and he just couldn’t figure out why.

But boy, did it hurt like hell.

A week later, Buck found himself complaining to Eddie and Maddie in a separate group chat he’d created for just the three of them.

Buck realized he was starting to sound a bit insane and deleted the entire message.

He didn't want to say that either. He didn't agree with Maddie. She wasn't wrong, she just didn't understand the sort of...friendship they had.

Buck glared at his barrages of texts, hoping he didn’t sound too eager or too annoying.

Buck put on one of his best shirts and threw on his apron and immediately started prepping for dinner. He was so excited to finally see Tommy again and cheer him up that he couldn’t stop smiling.

He rented Love, Actually to stream, curated a playlist of some of Tommy’s favorite songs, and even mixed up some boxed cake mix.

He didn’t have any frosting, so he hoped strawberry preserves would do.

He wanted this evening to be perfect for Tommy, so he could forget all about the cheating bastard that wasted his time and possibly broke his heart.

The thought of Tommy having a broken heart nearly shattered his own. He needed to fix it. He needed to let him know that he would always be there for Tommy, like Tommy was there for him.

Buck texted Tommy to let him know the door was unlocked for him.

Tommy welcomed himself into Buck’s apartment. Buck looked up from the counter, a wide ecstatic smile painted on his face.

“Smells amazing in here.”

“I hope so. I’m just throwing a few things together. It won’t be perfect but—“

“It’ll be perfect. It was more than I could’ve asked for. Thank you for all of this.”

Tommy’s eyes fell onto the cake on the counter. “You even baked a cake?”

“Uh yeah, but I don’t have any frosting. I hope strawberry preserves are—“

Buck glanced over at Tommy as he was helping himself to a slice of cake, slathering the strawberry preserves on top.

Tommy shoved a generous helping into his mouth, glancing up at Buck with wide eyes. “Sorry. Did you want me to wait until after dinner?”

Buck laughed, shaking his head. “It’s fine. Whatever you want.”

“It’s good cake.”

“It’s just from a box. I adjusted the recipe a little bit to make the cake more moist and flavorful—“

“It worked. This is delicious.”

“Good. I’m glad.”

They sat down and ate dinner, laughed and caught up on daily life outside of Gerrard and definitely outside of Edgar.

They watched Love, Actually and finished off the night with some beers.

“You’re right, Tommy. This is some really good beer.”

“Mhm. I told you.” Tommy paused to finish his beer. “Thank you again, Evan. Tonight was…really fun.” He smiled. “Really helped take my mind off—“

“You don’t have to think about him, Tommy. I’m here for you. You don’t have to feel alone.” Buck realized how strange his statement may have sounded. “You’ve also got all our friends at the 118 too.”

Tommy nodded with a small smirk. “I know.”

There was something odd about the sound of Tommy’s voice. Perhaps he was looking for something more. Something Buck just couldn’t give him.

But Buck, somehow, still wished he could give him everything.

#i didn't know i wanted you (until i couldn't have you)#bucktommy #tommy kinard #evan buckley #firefly.social #firebeast.doc #☁️ iCloud Drive > ivy > writing

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jellyfishoreo1206 · 2 years ago

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I really wasn't expecting so many people to like my Mirage x reader so much! I'm glad you guys liked it!

Though this is a rewrite, because I accidentally deleted the original. I'm still a little salty about it but it's whatever

Though there will be a small few changes that aren't updated in the part 1, but nothing much, just how the text will be colored. And some inconsistent POV changes

Y/N-Pink

Mirage-Blue

Noah-Orange

But anyway, here's part two!

Part one is here btw

Meeting Mirage ;)

Warnings: Suggested drug usage, language

"So is there a reason why we're walking instead of taking your car?" Currently right now, Y/N, who was about to go to bed several minutes ago, is now walking the empty streets of Brooklyn with Noah right beside her. And in addition of that, a blindfold for some reason that she's still trying to figure out. It was nearly midnight and this man literally just told her he had something important to show her. Many questions asked, and no answers yet.

He just kept responding with, 'you'll see when we get there', which is slowly starting to tick her off. And to make it just a little worse, she's still in her PJ's, a black tank top, some baggy white sweatpants that aren't even hers, and some worn out spiderman slippers. And it's fucking cold.

"It's close by, not even that long of a walk."

"It better be, because I swear to God Noah if whatever you're about to show me is something stupid I'm going to fucking kick you."

"I swear it's not."

"Also why did it have to be at night? Why not early in the morning?!"

"Because it couldn't wait until early in the morning!"

"Mhm, yeah right. You didn't even let me have time to put on a jacket. It's fucking cold."

"It's summer."

"You know how cold I am naturally!"

"Wouldn't be surprised if you were a lizard."

"Maybe I am, maybe I'm just befriending you so I can slowly take over humanity! Maybe so I can lick all the things I want without getting weird looks from people because it'll all be lizards!"

It was quiet for a moment, before the pair started to laugh at the comment. Sometimes they can't take each other seriously. It's always one of the two that makes the most random comments to ever been said.

"I'll get you some of those croissant thingys from that bakery you like. As a, 'Sorry for dragging you out of your apartment to show you something' apology."

"You better, you mother fucker...and bring some milk too."

"You're the only person I know that likes milk as a beverage."

"Hey! You can make all kinds of shit out of milk! It's not weird to like it as a beverage. Hell, you were drinking it out of your mother once!"

"Never say that sentence ever again."

Sooner or later, they finally arrived at their destination. With the jingling of keys, Noah unlocks a door before gently pulling her into the building. She was immediately hit with the smell of oil, the fumes of paint, and the smell of gas. Wherever they are, Y/N's guessing they're in Noah's garage.

Now, Noah was nervous, the whole entire time they walked here, he was fidgeting with his finger every so often. He fears how his best friend will react to Mirage, and hoping, hoping it's a good reaction. Though, it might be a small chance, but that's not stopping him from praying to the point someone passing by will probably think he's a little crazy.

"Heyyy you're back! And you brought the pretty lady too~" Now Y/N wasn't expecting another person to be here. She thought it would just be the two of them. Not that she was complaining, maybe this important thing needed someone to look after it so it wouldn't break or something.

Though in reality, it's a huge 12ft robot chilling on the floor, waiting for the both of them. But she doesn't know that. Yet.

"Y/N, I want you to me-"

Noah was cut off by Mirage, a pout on his face as he crosses his arms. "Nu uh man! Lemme have this one!" He quickly clears his throat, with a flirtatious smirk replacing that pout in seconds.

"The names Mirage, bonita~ But you can call me yours~" There was a playfulness in his tone, and to Y/N, he seemed very confident and outgoing. Maybe a little flirty, but that's fine with her. Though he does sound rather young, maybe around the same age as Noah? (I don't know how old he is, but I'm guessing maybe around 19-21, also reader is like 6 years older than Noah) And what a strange name, maybe it's a nickname he likes to go by.

"That's the most cheesiest line I've ever heard in my entire life." Y/N let's a chuckle slip through, snapping out of her little mind rant, a small smile making it's way onto her lips.

"Hey I spent a good amount of time on that! Plus, it's not that cheesey.."

"..Was that too cheesey?"

"Dude you're the one who came up with it, not me."

"But you're supposed to be my wingman here! I scratch your back, you scratch mine." There was a small stare down between the two, before Noah sighed.

"...okay maybe it was a little too cheesey-"

"I may not be able to see, but you guys are horrible at whispering."

Y/N was still standing somewhat next to Noah, arms crossed over her chest as she waited for their so called secret conversation to be over with. All the things she wants do is to go to sleep and enjoy her day-off the next day. That's all she asks for.

"Anyway, what's that important thing you wanted to show me, Noah?" She goes to remove the blindfold, but was stopped by a frantic Noah holding her wrists in a soft, but firm, grip.

"Shit! S-Sorry, it's just.." Noah sighs out in frustration, letting go of Y/N's wrists. "I gotta tell you something before I show you the thing." Said woman raised her brow at Noah's behavior. Now's she getting a little worried for what the hell Noah might show her.

"It's.. It's not something illegal, right?"

"No!" He pauses for a few seconds, "At least I don't thin-"

"NOAH-??"

"Right. So, uh, I think it's best if you just..see for yourself?"

"Why do you sound so unsure." Finally glad to be able to take off the damn fabric, Y/N looks at her surroundings, blinking rapidly to adjust her eyes. Her suspicions of being in Noah's garage was correct. But what she wasn't expecting was a huge metal being sitting in the middle of the room, optics on her with a mischievous smile on his face.

"Hey~"

It takes a few seconds before her mind could catch up, her expression blank. When the scene in front of her processed completely, she immediately turned around, walking towards the door with fast and hurried steps.

"Nope. Nu-uh. Not dealing with this shit tonight. Fuck this shit. I'm out. Peace. Adíos. Goodbye forever. So lon-"

"Y/N wait c-come back!"

"And I will walk 500 miles, and I'll walk 500 more-" Grabbing onto the handle, she tries to open it. Only thing was the door jammed repeatedly. "Fucking shit."

"Ouch, they never treated E.T like this." He pouts, dramatically putting the back of his hand to his forehelm. Now he was kind of expecting her to scream or least for her to faint, but this reaction was more amusing.

"Just let me, uh, us explain-!" Noah forcefully put himself between Y/N and the door, holding out his arms so she wouldn't try to go around. A staredown ensues.

"Please..?" Shrugging his shoulders a little with an unsure smile on his face, his attempt to make himself as convincing as possible. With a sigh, she nods, backing away from the door with slight hesitation. Turning back to the robot in question, Mirage has a bubbly smile on his face, optics lighting up.

"There you go! I ain' gonna hurt you," The mech coos teasingly. "Quite a show you put up though, ever thought of doing stand-up comedy?"

Y/N was still a bit tense, looking at the bot in caution. She doesn't even know what to do in a kind of situation like this. Hell, what do you even do in a kind of situation like this?

But despite that, Noah seems to know, Mirage was his name? He seems to know him pretty well, from how well Noah and him seem to get along. It actually explains a lot of things, that you didn't realize until then. How Noah seemed to be very secretive whenever it came to his garage, and seemed to be somewhat cautious whenever someone looks through his things.

"It's okay mami, you can admire this handsome face as long as you like~" Mirage's flirtatious voice broke you out of your mind ramble, a blush covering your face in an instant. You spaced out without realizing it.

"S-shit my bad."

"Heyy, it's alright~ Not often you come across a face like this!" He sticks his glossa out, making a peace sign with his servos as he winks at her. It, oddly made him cute. A small chuckle comes out of the woman, posture now slightly relaxed a little more, but still tense. Thinking this was a dream, she goes to pinch her arm as hard as she can, but no it's no dream. Maybe she had to much edibles before going to bed, and she was just in the streets all sluggish and her mind is throwing delusions at her, just for entertainment. Like a jester of sorts.

But she ran out of edibles 3 days ago, so that's most likely not the reason why.

Like promised, Noah and Mirage explained what, where, who, and why he was on Earth. And that there's more of him. And that they can transform into cars. And he demonstrated this, by transforming into a car himself. The Frankenstein car you were inside not longer than a week ago.

Now the dots were finally connecting.

She continues to ask him a variety of questions, each of which ranging from how long he's been on Earth, why he choose a Porsche to be his alt mode (to which he responded with, "A cool guy like me needs to have a pretty cool alt to go along with it" followed by a flirtatious wink), and how many other people know about his existence. By know your shoulders are less tense, posture completely relaxed as she continues a conversation with (mainly Mirage) the two of them.

And Mirage, being the big flirt he is, kept throwing pick-up lines whenever the chance showed itself, accompanied by a wink and a cute smirk. Each one making you a little flustered.

Eventually Noah had to leave, because apparently Kris never went to sleep in the first place, to busy to defeat Bowser. He knew because Kris accidentally blew his cover via walkie-talkie. So now it's just you and Mirage, all alone in the garage.

It felt somewhat awkward, but Mirage always found a way to break the silence of everything.

"So how'd you meet my boy?"

"His mom, she was a co-worker of mine a few years ago, and decided to invite me over to her house to meet her kids."

"And what, you guys hit it off there?"

Y/N let's out a small chuckle, shaking her head. "Not exactly. He was a little nervous at the start. We only started talking when I offered to babysit Kris." And the conversation continued on from there, leaking into the early hours of the morning.

Mirage knew he wanted to know and see more about the human, she's just so pretty and fascinating! And her reactions and little faces she makes are so cute to him, make him wanna squeeze her little cheeks. His tanks are filled with the fluttery feeling again, the more they talk, the more it increases. Now he knew when to take risks, and this is one of them definitely. He knows he wants to see more of her, to keep talking with her. Just makes his spark go absolutely crazy.

So why not ask her out?

Alright Mirage, you can do this, my man! Don't let that nervous feeling pull you down. C'mon c'mon c'mon! When will you get another chance like this ever again?

After giving himself a small prep talk, Mirage finally asks. "Hey you wanna go to the drive-ins sometime tomorrow? I'd love to keep seeing that pretty face of yours more~" A wink following with a smirk. His confidence was all over the place, and his spark was beating rapidly, like it's going to come out of his chassis. Obviously it wasn't shown on his face, but internally he was a nervous wreck.

You were somewhat taken off-guard by his question, a blush covering your cheeks. Is he asking you out on a date? I mean, he could be asking to hang out more, but his various flirtatious comments and compliments thrown at you made you think otherwise.

Now that she thinks about, he's actually a lot better than any person she's been in a relationship with. He's actually makes her laugh, is nice and gentle, a good listener, and overall quite comfortable to be around with. And he's quite a cutie and handsome one too..fuck it.

"Sure. What time, handsome~?" The mech perked up at her response, optics lighting up. "How 'bout sometime at 7? I know a pretty good spot~"

"Then it's a date." Oh how that word made his spark flutter. He does a little dance and fists his hand in the air for his small victory, Y/N laughing a little at his antics. Her cheeks hurt so much from smiling so much. She's pretty excited for tomorrow's drive-in now.

When Mirage finally settles down, she beckons him down to be at her level, a small mischievous smile on her face. Confused, he does so, couching down until becoming face to face with her smiling face.

Warm lips peck his metal cheek, his optics widening in surprise at the bold gesture, a blue blush makes itself known on his face. The warmth spreading through his entire body as a shiver goes up his backstruts. Now he's for sure his spark might just beat out his chassis. She can practically hear it!

"Something for you to think about until tomorrow~ Goodnight Mirage~" And with that, she leaves the garage, a big smile on her face as she makes her way home, ready to finally crash into her bed and excited for the night tomorrow.

Mirage was left crouching in the garage, a surprised look still of his face, still trying to process what had just happen. His look of shock then quickly shifted to a look of giddiness, letting out a victory whoop as he tries to calm his beating spark.

"Man, what a woman!" And he cannot wait to see her again.

#transformers x reader #mirage x reader #rotb mirage #rotb mirage x reader #such a cute baby #rise of the beasts #knightverse #bayverse #noah diaz

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willowser · 1 year ago

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i received this lovely lovely lil thought from a lovely lovely anon in response to this question, and i think we ALL should get to enjoy it 🥹🩷

(Tw:Abuse / Manipulation (kind of; it's not overly gratuitous, but better safe than sorry))

Will! !! So I was thinking about your "would Bakugou chase after you, even after you're engaged" post (loved it! spinning it around in my head), and while I do think he'd probably let you go if you were truely happy with this other person, y'know what might change that? If this other person wasn't making you happy. (I’M SO SORRY FOR THE INCOMING WALL OF TEXT – please just delete if I’m being annoying!!) To explain; I think in this scenario, maybe you're still getting over a long-time unrequited crush (👀), and you're looking for something with a normal, sweet guy to help get over it. He's not the type you would usually go for, but he's nice enough (idk, maybe he has blonde hair, or red eyes, and maybe that makes it easier). And while you initially thought this would just be a short fling, it just kind of... gets away from you? A few dates turn into a few more, and then lots more and before you know it things are getting Serious. He's talking about moving in together, and you're taken aback by it (weren't you just starting to go out together? Isn't this too soon?). But it's not like you have anything real to complain about! He's not horrible to you or anything! He treats you well enough! It's just that you don't seem to feel anything... deep? for him. You don't daydream about a future together, you don't go out and wish he was there with you; Honestly, if he's not there with you, you don't think much about him at all (not the way you used to with him 👀). And hey, maybe sometimes (frequently) you end up doing things you didn't want to do, maybe he knows what to say to get you to acquiesce to his wants and needs, without coming across as manipulative. Or maybe you're just nervous! He isn't "rushing you long term commitments, which would dissuade you from leaving", the two of you are just caught up in a Whirlwind Romance! /Sarcastic. Being honest, that kind of thing grinds a person down after a while; you bend much more easily to his whims. He is, after all, so Normal and so Sweet - and how often do guys like that turn up? You'd be a fool to dump him now, now he knows you so well, and really. What are you expecting? Some Prince Charming(👀) to come and sweep you off your feet? Get real. So you get the flat together, and later on (though sooner than you'd like), you accept his proposal.

1 / 7 (I'm so sorry)

2/7 To my mind, this is the kind of diverging path for Bakugou. I think, if this was a genuine whirlwind romance, and it was recognised by the people around you, he'd probably back off. For all his brashness, he wouldn't want to hurt you by ruining your wedding day to the person you actually love. TBH I can kind of see him pining for you for the rest of his life, and hoping you become a widow/er so he get another shot to confess his feelings lmao. In that situation he could write off his own negative feelings towards your fiance as his own jealousy, right? If the fiance were actually bad for you, at least one other person from your respective friend group would notice. But!! I think that would change if his opinions were backed up by his friends (because it would demonstrate that it isn’t just his jealousy tarnishing his opinion of your boyfriend) Let's imagine that maybe he isn't the only one to think something Weird is going on. Maybe he's hanging out with Denki and Sero, because he's so obviously miserable about not confessing in time, and they're trying to cheer him up (it's been a month and he's mouldering. He is suffering). In walk Eijiro and Mina, who - while they were out getting snacks that Bakugou would never even consider eating if he wasn't in the depths of despair - just so happened to run into you and your new... boyfriend? Kind of? You seemed kind of reluctant to say the two of you were dating, but he seemed nice. Eijiro thinks he's kind of bland, and Mina knows you can do better (which she says both for Bakugou's ego, and because it's true), but nice enough. And you know, maybe, for the first time in a month, Bakugou stops sitting so rigidly. He doesn't slouch per se, no. He relaxes in the same way that tiger might relax before pouncing, in the way that a hunter might breathe out before pulling the trigger. A month of dating, and you still won't call the guy your boyfriend? When you'd introduced them to each-other (after your third date), Bakugou assumed it was his jealousy that made him hate the guy. Kind of boring, kind of pushy (a/n: no, he wouldn't clock the fact that he looks like off-brand Bakugou). He didn't think it would last too long, but it still felt bitter that that was the guy who beat him to the punch.

But seriously; a month of dating, and you still won't call the guy your boyfriend? That's... interesting >:)

3/7 So months roll by, and Bakugou keeps his eye on you. He flipflops between anguishing over his jealousy, and making sure that your “boyfriend” is treating you right. Of course, it’s made harder by the fact that he doesn’t see you that much any more. Your other friends notice it too; You’re not being kept inside your (shared) flat, but you always seem busy, and a bit tired. Ochako and Iida can usually grab you for lunch, Momo swings by your flat pretty often, but your social calendar seems so full now. Full of dates and outings with your new boyfriend. Apparently, you barely have a minute for someone you’ve been friends with since childhood.

It pisses Bakugou off to no end, but he’s keeping his distance (for now). Because the thing is, Bakugou – above anything else – respects you. If you want to waste your time on some loser, he’s not going to presume that he knows better for you! Bakugou’s many things but he’s not “fuckin’ presumptuous”. Besides, if you really were in dire straights, or needed help, you’d reach out. It’s not like you don’t still send him little messages every other day; memes you think he’ll like, little scenic photographs of your dates (conspicuously, your boyfriend is missing from every single one👀). He’s Fine. He can Be Patient. (Reader, he’s been seething for months).

4/7 HOWEVER. Flashing forward to The Proposal. I think it shakes him; firstly because the person he loves is getting married to another man, and he somehow thought you’d have ended it by now. But secondly because everyone else seems to agree that it’s weird! It’s way too soon for marriage to a guy that you don’t even seem to like all that much, and while everyone gently float their concerns to you that maybe it’s just a teeny tiny smidge too soon to get married (which you rebuff half-heartedly), the group-chat is popping the fuck off. It’s definitely too soon, this guy is Too Normal in a very weird way, they barely know him, the wedding is taking place really soon, they should stage in intervention (Eijiro&Tsuyu&Sero), they should kidnap you until you realise what a mistake it would be (Mina&Denki), they should kill him (Deku&Ochako&Iida), etc. It’s pretty weird, then, that Bakugou comes in as the voice of reason; you’re a grown up, and you can make your own decisions. If you really, genuinely want to marry him, that’s up to you; After all the freedom to make your own decisions comes with the responsibility to accept the consequences. (a/n: obvs it would be phrased in a far more Bakugou-esque fashion, but you get my point). So they relent, although they’re still concerned.

So maybe a few days before the wedding he sends you a message (because it’s tricky to get a hold of you in person); he just wants to know what you see in your fiance. He wants to know if you’re really serious about him, or if you’re just settling. It’s not phrased cruelly, but it’s blunt. The message he sends isn’t nice and sweet, but it’s honest, and it comes from a place of concern.

You read it and you don’t reply.

Flash forward again, and it’s the night before the wedding. Wedding Eve, if you will. Bakugou’s in a sour mood and tries to ease his pain by heading to a bar, but it doesn’t really get any better throughout the night. He’s conflicted now more than ever; Is this guy actually awful and bad for you, or is he just jealous? Is he not stepping in because he wants to be respectful of your wishes, or because he’s afraid that by doing so he’ll reveal his own feelings, and suffer the consequent (possible) rejection? Why didn’t he just tell you how he felt before this mess started? He has a few drinks to many, and falls into a dreamless sleep.

5/7 MERRY WEDDINGMAS. It’s the day of the wedding, and because of he hit the bottle too hard last night, Bakugou’s overslept (for the first time in his life, probably). He goes to check his phone – maybe he can still make it to the wedding the venue on time?-

TWO MISSED MESSAGES.

He didn’t realise, but last night you finally replied to his message: You don’t know if you want to get married to this guy.

It’s a long, winding message, but what it boils down to is this- You threw yourself into a relationship with someone you know you don’t really love (you like him well enough, but there’s no spark), because you’ve been spending years muddling your way through a hopeless crush on someone you think will never like you back. So you’ve let yourself go along with this guy, but now you’re on Wedding Eve, and you’ve never been so uncertain of yourself! Your fiance’s a sensible choice (He’s Bland, and he’s Pushy, but he’s Nice, and he’s Normal, but maybe you’re losing yourself in your relationship with him, but maybe you just have cold feet), but you’re not sure that you care any more, and it’s now or never, and it’s ‘You, Bakugou, It’s always been you’, and you’ve been too afraid to tell him, because when does real life play out like the films? When does the years long pining, the roller-coaster of emotions, the ‘I’ve been in love with you since the moment I saw you’, have a happily-ever-after in the real world?

The next message was sent a few hours later. Evidently, you’d calmed down somewhat, because you tell him that you’re sorry for sending him all of that on Wedding Eve, that you’ve had feelings for him for a long time, but if he doesn’t feel the same it would be the kind of closure you’d need to move on. If he doesn’t want to attend the ceremony, you’ll understand and leave him alone. But if he wants to “talk” (👀!!!), then you’ll be waiting for him.

Bakugou feels raw after reading your confession; All this time, and the two of you – despite sharing the same feelings – were so afraid, and for what? The relief, the fear, the hope, all spur him into action.

He’s hungover, he’s in his pyjamas, but all the same he’s rushing towards his expensive, fuel-efficient car as fast as he can, because he has a fuckin’ wedding to stop.

6/7 Meanwhile, you’re stressed, mentally twisting into knots. Bakugou didn’t even read the messages you sent last night, which is both a relief (now you can just get married and move on) and a heart wrenching disappointment (because if you’re being honest with yourself, you were hoping he’d stop you).

You’re wearing an outfit you don’t really like, and your fiance’s family are beaming at you, although you don’t really know them so well. The venue is pleasant but not what you would’ve chosen for yourself. As you walk down the aisle, the band sounds kind of off. Your family and friends are… what? Grimacing? Smiling? Both Smimacing? You aren’t sure.

The ceremony passes in a kind of blur, and you go through the all motions. Mostly, you think of the messages you’d sent to Bakugou. You’d felt so courageous when you finally – finally! - confessed your feelings to him, so hopeful that maybe instead of replying, you’d hear a knock at your door, and he’d sweep you off your feet and- then hours had passed without a word, and you’d been left wondering. Conflicted, and unsure.

As you wait for your fiance to finish his vows (that he wrote himself, but sound like he stole them from a Pinterest board), however, you have a mild epiphany. Did it really matter so much if Bakugou loved you back? Sure, it’d break your heart, but one day you’d heal from it. Besides, he wouldn’t want to settle for some nobody! Bakugou was loyal to his friends, and he wanted the best for them, and that was one of the things you loved most about him! Surely, you owed it to both him, and more importantly, yourself, to put an end to this madness!!

You steel yourself as it gets to That Part of the wedding. The officiant turns to you, and asks if you take this man to be your lawful wedded husband. You face your fiance, and open your mouth to say “Actually…. I DON’T” when-

The doors slam open, and who’s standing there in a matching pair of pyjamas, still holding his car keys? It’s Bakugou, and you only have to lock eyes with him for him to shout – in true romcom fashion – ‘I FUCKIN’ OBJECT’.

7/7 Everyone’s stunned, although the guests on your side of the venue look more thrilled than scandalised.

In truth, I wouldn’t normally peg Bakugou as the “Objecting at a wedding” type, but in this scenario – when the two of you have been pining for so long, when he knows you’d appreciate the spectacle, when he gets to show up that nobody who wasted your time for so long – I think maybe he’d make an exception. Maybe he wouldn’t make some long, protracted speech about how much he loves you, but he MIGHT run to the alter full tilt, and tell you that you’re making a mistake. I do think MAYBE he’d hold out his hand to you, a silent question in his eyes, all while your fiance sputters and rants.

Idk, maybe you say something to the effect of “Looks like he beat me to the punch – I object, too :)”, tell your ex-fiance you’re sorry, but you can’t do this. PERHAPS – after all of the years of wondering, and stressing about whether Bakugou would reject you – you’d just quietly take his hand. And maybe to two of you would scamper off down the aisle to the raucous applause of your friends and family, get into his hatchback or w/e, and drive off into the sunset, certain in the knowledge that – yes, there would be ramifications to running off together like this, but that whatever might come your way you’d face it together! MAYBE.

Idk, I just feel like if he was going to confess his feelings for you after you’d already been engaged, it might be in the form of kissing the back of your hand, pulling off your cheap, shitty engagement ring, throwing it out of the car window, and going for a long drive so you two can finally Talk.

Listen, this really got away from me, and I’m so sorry for flooding your inbox like this. I was just really caught up in the scenario, and wanted to share it with you. Much love 💖

#brain sleepy but i love everything about this #so much #i love how easily you weaved in the feelings and the angst and us knowing in our gut what we really wanted !!#this is pretty much my exact answer/thought in response to that question !!! the kind of scenario i love !!!!!#tysm for sharing this with us WAAAAHHH #this is so lovely thank you thank you !!#✿ ask willow #✿ recs

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blubberquark · 1 year ago

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Your Code Is Hard To Read!

This is one of those posts I make not because I think my followers need to hear them, but because I want to link to them from Discord from time to time. If you are a Moderator, Contributor or "Helpfulie" on the PyGame Community Discord, I would welcome your feedback on this one!

"You posted your code and asked a question. We can't answer your question. Your code is hard to read."

Often when we tell people this, they complain that coding guidelines are just aesthetic preferences, and they didn't ask if their code followed coding guidelines. They asked us to fix the bug. That may be so, but the problem remains: If you ask us to fix your code, we can only help you if we can read it.

Furthermore, if there are many unrelated bugs, architectural problems, and hard to understand control flow, the concept of fixing an isolated bug becomes more and more unclear.

In order to fix unreadable code, you could:

eliminate global variables

replace magic numbers with constants

replace magic strings with enumerations

name classes, functions, constants, variables according to consistent coding standards

have functions that do one thing and one thing only like "collision detection" or "collision handling". If your function does two things at the same time, like rendering AND collision detection, then it must be refactored

rewrite deeply nested and indented code to be shallower

rewrite code that keeps a lot of state in local variables into special-case functions

use data structures that make sense

write comments that explain the program, not comments that explain the programming language

delete unneccessary/unreachable code from the question to make it easier to read or from your program to see if the problem persists

My own programs often violate one or more of those rules, especially when they are one-off throwaway scripts, or written during a game jam, or prototypes. I would never try to ask other people for help on my unreadable code. But I am an experienced programmer. I rarely ask for help in an unhelpful way. Almost never ask for help in a way that makes other experienced programmers ask for more code, or less code, or additional context. I post a minimal example, and I usually know what I am doing. If I don't know what I am doing, or if I need suggestions about solving my problem completely differently, I say so.

Beginner programmers are at a disadvantage here. They don't know what good code looks like, they don't know what good software architecture looks like, they don't know how to pare down a thousand lines of code to a minimal example, and if they try to guess which section of code contains the error, they usually guess wrong.

None of this matters. It may be terribly unfair that I know how to ask smart questions, and beginner programmers ask ill-posed questions or post code that is so bad it would be easier and quicker for an experienced programmer to re-write the whole thing. It is often not feasible to imagine what the author might have intended the code to work like and to fix the bugs one by one while keeping the structure intact. This is not a technical skill, this is a communicative and social skill that software engineers must pick up sooner or later: Writing code for other people to read.

If your code is too hard to read, people can't practically help you.

It gets worse. Unreadable code is sometimes unreadable because it is un-salvageable. It is hard to understand because there is nothing to understand, it would not work, and you need to go back to the drawing board.

Defensive Responses

This is not where the problem ends. Often, after a couple of rounds of back and forth, after questions like "Well, you say there is a bug, but can you tell me what you would want the code to do in the first place?", or "Is this a class or an instance? If it's supposed to be an instance variable, could you give it a lowercase name?" or "Could you give that variable _obj a more descriptive name? It looks like you are assigning different things to this variable in different parts of your loop. Perhaps you could use two variables with different, more descriptive names", you see a defensive response. The original question asker is not interested in making code easy to read, just in making it work. As I explained above, this is a confused way of thinking, because ill-posed questions and unreadable code make it difficult to impossible to make the code work, or to even understand what making it work would look like.

"Style is irrelevant." – This is by far the most common one. Since coding style, comments, variable names, and even re-factoring code into smaller functions do not affect the output, and thus not the correctness of the program.

"I asked for help with bugs, not style." – This is a variation on the first one. As long as there is no concrete and discrete bug, style feedback and questions for clarification can be discarded.

"This is too much work." – The original poster explains that making the code more readable is too much work for them, and fixing the bugs would be easier for others.

"Nobody will see the code anyway" – Nobody will see the code of the finished product, so it's irrelevant. Sometimes there are variations like "We aren't graded on code quality, only correctness" or "This is for a class project, nobody will depend on the code, so we don't need robustness."

"This is just throwaway code, it doesn't have to be good." – Like the previous one, this is frustrating to read because somebody posted the code on a forum for other people to read and asked them to understand it, and then said he doesn't care if it's readable or debuggable.

"I asked you for help." / "I am asking the questions here." – The original poster refuses to answer questions, because he asked, he expects answers, not questions in return.

"Don't blame me, I didn't write it" – We have completely left the realm of correctness and style now. The poster knows the code is unreadable, or doesn't make sense. He tried to protect his reputation. But he doesn't like the tone of the responses. Its not his fault the code doesn't make sense. It's not his fault if it doesn't work. Common variations are "This must be correct, it was the accepted answer on StackOverflow", or "I copied this from a tutorial", or "Don't blame me, this was written by GitHub Copilot". Often part of the problem is that the code has different parts written in different styles, or uses different data structures in different places, and both parts could benefit from a re-write to make them more consistent with each other. At other times the problem is that the code from the book is "correct" for certain purposes from the book, but not really suited for the problem at hand.

"I apologised already" – The poster is frustrated because he said "I am sorry I am a n00b" or "I am sorry for my bad English" already. Then somebody said his code is unreadable or his prose makes no sense. The poster sees readable code, or at least code that is readable enough to understand what the idea was, as a courtesy, as a social custom, not as something necessary to make the whole question and answer thing work. The same goes for a firm grasp of English. The poster apologised already that his English is bad, and you should just see past it. Dealing with this is especially difficult, because Q&A is framed as some kind of status game, and the poster is trying hard to save face already. Push-back will make him feel like he is losing face, and he will only get more defensive.

Causes

So where does the problem begin? Why do people write unreadable code, post it online, and get defensive? I think the answer is a combination of programming skill, social skill, and simplistic mental models.

Software Engineering is Difficult: Obviously, one root cause is that beginner programmers can't already write readable code from the start. Writing readable, well-factored code that is easy to debug, re-use, and adapt is something that comes with experience. Writing code for other people to read can only be learned after one has learned to write code.

Magical Thinking/Limited Cognitive Empathy: The most common and most direct cause of this phenomenon – the refusal to help others read your unreadable code – is not the unreadable code itself. It is the belief that it should be easy for experienced programmers to understand the structure of and intent behind a piece of code, even if the person who wrote it didn't. If you see software as basically magic, and don't see computers as soulless automatons that do what they do because they are built that way, then this is an easy trap to fall into.

A variant of this works for language. If somebody is bad at English, or bad at the technical jargon needed to ask his question, he will often think that the question he thought up in his native Klingon was perfectly well-formed, and that other people should have no trouble reading his words, because they also think in Klingon, so they would translate it into a question that makes sense anyway.

Status-Consciousness: Many beginner programmers feel the desperate need to distinguish themselves from other beginners, and if they have been learning JavaScript for two months now, they want to be seen as real programmers, not as children who play with Scratch and build Redstone contraptions in MineCraft. They want to be taken seriously. This reminds me of a five year old boy who stretches out his arm and tells me he is THIS BIG, and he is already FIVE, going on SIX, and he will go to SCHOOL soon.

Naive Mental Model of De-Bugging: Every program has a certain number of discrete features bugs, and when you remove all bugs, you end up with a program that works. This is of course nonsense. You can write a program that has an indeterminate number of bugs, or a program that implements an algorithm that doesn't quite work, or a useless program, or a program that does random nonsense.

With any luck, sooner or later, programmers will learn the technical side, and the social and collaborative side of software development.

#programming #python #forum culture #stack overflow #teaching programming

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newwavesylviaplath · 2 months ago

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my best friend who i think might be harbouring a little bit of resentment toward me and also lives five hours away said she's probably not gonna be able to come visit on my birthday :( ik this is like stupid and really self centered of me cuz like she'd have to take a train and stuff but i just needed to talk abt it cuz im kind of bummed out. my birthday always falls on the first few days of spring break and i offered for her to stay with me as long as possible but she said she didn't want to and im like sad about it. but i also feel really like spoiled and gross complaining about it cuz train tickets are crazy expensive and as far as i know she hasn't gotten a job since moving away plus it requires a lot of planning on her part and idk im still upset abt it i think ill delete this later but for now i just wanted to talk about it a little

#camryn omg shut up #more of me just saying things #kind of a rant i guess??#girlblogging #will delete later #coquette #hyper feminine #tumblr girlies #this is a girlblog #2014 tumblr #lana del rey #cinnamon girl #lizzy grant #girl interrupted #shitpost

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ganeshpnf · 6 months ago

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To the anon that sent me an ask about asking my thoughts about the tv show, Im so sorry but something happened and I think it got deleted 😭 But dw I would still answer it here-

So this would be a critism post and I want to make it clear that everyone is free to reblog and comment their thoughts freely, while being kind. Critism is valid and its not rude, but any bad comments or hateful remarks to any actor, especially child actors, would be deleted. I dont like blocking so dont make me please!

Okay to start, I would be so honest and say I did not find the show successful and I did not like it. I would explain all the reasons, but did it make me feel nostalgia a bit? Yes it did. Did it make me cry at the end? Yes :) I would add pros at the end. But first:

Cgi was really bad, I mean that claiming scene would be a laughing stock in a few years. Chimera? Nope- Medusa's hair also looked better in that movie in 2010. Also they avoided showing Grover's legs so much, also didn't even show us riptide's change...They got 15M per episode and if these are the results, then it is a problem. Background of Percy and Ares's fight- so so greenscreen. I wish Disney can take things seriously.

Lighting was so dark, especially for the lighting thief. Which was such a humor filled book and it was way too colorful. Why make it all so dark and lifeless?

Also humor? Way too low for pjo. "But we are not reading Percy's mind!" Yet, there were so many jokes in the books that could have been add, but they didn't. Yes there are some good jokes (pinecone fate) but to the standart, I expected to laugh way more. Its pjo!

Changes? Well to be honest I am a person who keeps book and show separate, I dont think they are the same at all. So I dont complain about the changes at much. But most of the changes were pointless to me and so many things left unsaid. I wish they didn't make Gabe way too soft. Children's show, yes. But then again, what would you do for later seasons if they cant even show Crusty's dead. Sally's real reason to marry Gabe never get explained, why? 4 pearls, why? Missing deadline? Totally pointless. Not mentioning Riptide's name? Chiron might have say it. Love tunnel? Now its a long one. Rick explained they couldn't do spiders and its hilarious, you gotta do sea monsters man- And instead of a chance to see an actual comedy: live on Olympus and Annabeth losing her shit. We get to see such a early scene of Percabeth drama. Why changing one of the funniest scene in the books to drama? You needed more edits for view or smt? Hephaestus falling over to the speech of friendship was nothing but cringe to me. Moving on, Thalia's acting to Annabeth. Why she is not nice to her and Annabeth had to earn her love. The point was Thalia to remember Jason and taking Annabeth under her wings immediatly bcs of it. Medusa's scene- Instead of us laughing to trio's silly behaviours and falling to her trap like little kids would, we get to hear a monster-hero talk. Yay another speech! Ovid's side of the story also bothered me. Greek mythology, why adding Ovid? Just us to sympatize with Medusa. Lotus Casino scene- We could have watch them have fun and going crazy but noo- they had do add more drama with Hermes. Did not see the point of his appearing either. Why is he there? I wanted to see them being children...And wanted to see the magic of the place!

Now if I move to characters, Percy's I know it all side is just annoying and adds no suspense to the viewers. What's the point if he knows everything already? "But his mom taught him!" But guys, remember, the whole point of pjo was: us to learn with Percy! We were learning the Greek myths with Percy, who is new to the world. They go somewhere and Percy immediatly: "You are Crusty, my mom told stories about you!" 😑 What a relief then! You tell us. Percy's sudden bravery at the end? Dude, he has 5 books for that.

Annabeth turning to a stoic child soldier? Suddenly goody-two shoes? Where are her emotions? Her fears? Her flaws? Her fricking love of architecture? She doesnt need to know everything to be smart girl. She had ADHD, she is 12! Ofc she was supposed to fall in traps. We should have watch her blushing as Luke talks, getting all wet by Percy in the toilet, she was supposed to our little girl. She is not just a badass queen yet, please. Give her personality back. Why she only smiled once at the end of the series? And not having a childhood, not even watched a movie? You guys cant be serious- She grew up in chb! She picked up strawberries, she played games and she watched movies when she was little, remember? She was not in legion... She is one of the most emotional characters, should we remind this to Rick and writers? She cries, she has feeling! Dam she was crying when they left Cerberus! She was a trouble-maker, she stole clothes, remember? Her portrayal was awful...

And about the Gods- Just..."He is trying to make them look awful at the beginning" Then why the hell it was only Athena? Almost turning her to second Zeus- Are you kidding me? You make her suddenly a child killer, when in the books she was nothing like that. Why making her worse, when other gods(Poseidon, Hermes, Hephaestus,Dionysus,Ares,Hades) seem way more human and nicer? You cant tell me he tries to make them worse when they are portrayed like that! No sir- Hephaestus is nice enough to release Percy after a friendship speech. Poseidon is suddenly a perfect dad, he is not sorry that Percy is born. Ares is just a dumb twitter bully, where in the books he was threating them to no end. And fricking Hades?! I am sorry but Hades like that- He should have been scary. But no, he is just a lonely cool guy. I thought he softened after Nico. Cant wait for the development now...

Other than that, one of my most important things: vibe. Sorry...Like I said, it was way too boring for pjo. Even that horrible movies had more vibe! Gimme the vibe!

Pacing? Has a problem and I hope they fix it. Episodes being too short? Also another issue.

Now for the chb, I was hoping to see more activity. Why the camp is not full of noisy kids running around, playing hide and seek like in the books, training wild around the areas, camfire and silly songs? Where are our children screaming and being ADHD demigods? Instead they play chess in the cabin- Please, give more life to chb.

Finally, for the things I liked:

Riptide song!!! That song is my favourite thing in the whole show- Like its soo good.

Seeing Sally's struggle to raise Percy. Also a plus for me. Because I was curious. Also adding Poseidon to the scene was okay. I loved that parts.

Young Percy did awesome and he was such a good actor :)

Percy's dreams were good, I loved seeing them. Congrats! Andd, child accurate cast. It was important. But I wish they hurry so then we wont have it anymore 😭

That was it! Like I said, I find it a bad show, as a fan of 12 years. I waited this for so many years. I was dreaming this. But sorry, bad show is a bad show. At least it did give me some nostalgia and it did make me cry at the end :) I hope they improve because it would suck if they get a cancel before season 5. The bad thing is, I feel they knew we pjo fandom wanted a show for years. And they knew we would eat the crumbs. Its just not fair, you know. They would like it anyway, type. They are not taking it as seriously as they should. With that budget, look at other shows with that budget. I know, its still a kids' show. But I dont think its an excuse for them to upset the fans who waited this long...

Thanks for the ask anon! And like I said, feel free to add your thoughts :)

#pjo tv show #critism #pjo tv show critism #annabeth chase #percy jackson #gods #athena pjo #athena #hermes pjo #hephaestus pjo #grover underwood #pjo

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