#might be able to get someone to drive me there?
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I understand what you're trying to do but in my experience it doesn't work
I've debunked literally hundreds of insane, factually & scientifically wrong crap a friend has been sending me off social media since the FIRST orange asshole campaign
It has not made a difference & I recently realized why (aside from, y'know, tens of thousands of Chinese & Russian social media bots gaming algorithms to inject false narratives into the mainstream to influence elections & democracy in multiple countries...)
It's because facts do not matter to him anymore
This is a belief system very much like religion - it might as well be religion
It is impervious to facts & science
Yet this is someone who I once considered highly intelligent & I still cannot understand how he's fallen for all of this except that, deep down, he must have either a hollow core, or a core of hate, that wants everyone else in the world to be as secretly miserable as he is (which I only know because I've known him for decades - since high school - casual observers would never say "this guy is miserable & self-loathing")
Objectively, on paper, he is intelligent or at least was intelligent & high scoring enough to get into Ivy League universities when we were graduating high school (he did not go to any tho; neither of us could afford such universities; we went to the state university that would take literally anyone, at the time, & from which you had to work at getting kicked out)
This was formerly a pro-choice, pro-porn, pro-drug guy who has drunk the Kool-aid - he's still pro-porn & pro-drug but suddenly in the past 2 years, as "throw it back to the states" became the propaganda on X (his favorite social media, ugh), he started saying it should be thrown back to the states
This from a guy who used to say - in his 20s, 30s, 40s - that abortion should be available on demand at drive thrus (which was hyperbole ofc; obvs you can't get one at an actual drive thru; it was the concept of fast & easy access he was championing)
As these right wing evangelical positions have trended on X, they have come up in his speech the past couple of years (really the past decade, but it accelerated like the speed of light once he moved from FB to the post-Musk Twitter/X)
Because I've known him for so long, I've been able to say, "Huh, you never used to say/believe that over the last 40 years... Why the change, & why now?"
& even that does not get him to realize his opinions are being deliberately shaped by propaganda
He will deny it or say "well I always kind of thought that way" & when I say "dude, you've never been shy of sharing your opinions, whether people wanted to hear them or not, especially if not! so why haven't you mentioned this change of opinion until after X became your main source of 'news'?"
That gets evasions & subject changes because the idea that he didn't come up with these ideas on his own is unacceptable
He will share literally fake news from X & when I ask, "OK, I get that you don't trust mainstream media, with good reason; or the government, with good reason; or the medical/scientific establishment, not without good reason; but you'll just believe anything some clown you don't know on the Internet - who could be anywhere in the world despite his "US Navy Vet" trucker hat - says, without question?"
& his response is always subject changes & attacks on mainstream media/government/politicians/parties but never an answer to the actual question because there is no rational explanation & he knows it
& if I call him on the subject changes, he just ratchets up the subject changes & attack rhetoric as if I'm one of those easily offended wilting liberal flowers he can steamroll, which I'm not & never have been, so it's interesting (if sad) that he thinks what works on other people will work on me
Or maybe he just doubles down because there IS no rational explanation, idk
This is seriously depressing me because this guy was my BFF for like the first 30 of our 40 year friendship - my older sisters would call him "our adopted little brother" - & I don't recognize him anymore
The only reason I continue to talk to him, really, is my oldest sister, who passed away a year ago in February, & was a big activist & organizer/coordinator of various (large) protests here, said "don't give up on him, don't fight or argue - just keep listening & questioning" because "he's a good egg"
& honestly he is, underneath all the sourball curmudgeon thorny exterior - the man has never not been there when I needed him & lots & lots of times when I didn't, just for fun
But this is becoming exhausting & I'm stressed out from not literally screaming "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!? WHERE IS MY FRIEND, YOU CRAZY POD PERSON WHO TOOK HIS PLACE??"
I'm sorry - I'm just venting, I guess
But please tell me how someone can maintain the cognitive dissonance of a high index of suspicion for the mainstream media, the government, & medicine/science, but not some Joe Blow clown on the Internet - as if somehow that guy (who's probably actually a Chinese or Russian bot) is telling the gospel truth & has a hidden mainline to the secrets of the universe
Because I can't understand it
I can understand it in people who've not had the privilege of university education (my friend has)
or international travel (my friend has, multiple times, with me & others)
or who never left the neighborhood or town where they grew up (my friend did as soon as he could)
I cannot understand it in my formerly skeptical & always shrewd friend
I honestly do not get it 😞
So many people do not understand the relationship between climate change and cold weather.
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(7) Cheater: Dick Grayson x reader
part 1/ part 2 / part 3 / part 4/ part 5 / part 6
A/N: ladies and gentlemen I give you : THE FINALE! happy early b-day @pookieisme4life 🎁🎁 (I was about to wait till 24th but it turned out impossible I am so excited to post it!!!)
***
„Who the hell are you?”
Honestly, he could care less about the ID of the mystery person, nor he hoped for the actual answer, but the initial shock did just that.
They were driving towards some unknown destination that was allegedly the location of the place Y/N was taken to.
“Nice try, Nightwing. Keep dreaming” the person, who was already deemed as a woman, laughed, swirling abruptly yet skillfully.
“Seriously you can’t just expect me to address you in a hey, you way.”
“Valid point. For the sake of it, let’s settle on calling me Shadow.”
“Fine. Whatever. Now why are you helping me?”
“I did some bad things In my life. Maybe this is my way of making up for them.”
“Huh. Seeking redemption?”
“Pretty nice trope, isn’t it?” she laughed. It was actually pretty nice to be able to use humor even in dire situations. “I was always a sucker for the character who wants to do better in their life.”
“Yeah. At least you chose a better way to do so than my brother.”
“You mean Red Hood?”
“For someone I don’t know shit about, you seem awfully knowledgeable about my family ties.”
“Intel is everything, Nightwing. And yes, I know what your other brother, Red Robin, might say.”
“Who the hell are you?!” At this point Dick was really getting curious.
“A friend.” She responded, looking right at him, her eyes shining from behind the mask.
***
“Let me go!!”
“Easy princess. Behave or this might actually get worse for you.”
“LET ME GO!!” she struggled against the binding on her wrist and the sack put on her head.
“What did I tell you, you bitch!?” She was abruptly pulled out of the car and thrown onto the ground. “Do you have a death wish?!”
“Fuck you!”
“If I were you, I’d cooperate, you little slut. Otherwise we might have to scar that pretty face of yours more than it’s necessary.”
With a sharp movement the sack was torn off her head and she had to squint her eyes from the light that hit her eyes with excessive force, reinforced by the fact she had just spent god knows how much time in a dark car with eyes covered.
“Shit…” there was no possibility to hold back the hiss and a few tears rolling down her cheeks.
“Yes. Yes sunshine, you’re in deep shit.” The kidnapper kneeled to her level and caressed her cheek in a condescending gesture, obviously misreading her tears as a sign of fear and submission. “So pretty…”
“Piss off!” she acted instinctively, ending up with a slap on the cheek and stinging sensation that only added to her anger.
“Didn’t I tell you to behave?”
“I had a stinking sack on my head, maybe there was something wrong with my hearing at the time and – “ her head spun to the side as another slap, this time far harder landed on her cheek.
“Well you definitely heard me now. And if you didn’t I won’t hesitate to remind you again. Now get up, we’re taking you to the boss.”
Great.
She was in a freaking video game, when two brainless thugs captured her for a reason that was still a mystery to her and was now taking her to the den of a final boss on the level.
***
“Y/N Y/L/N.”
Should she even be surprised that said den had a design of a video game? Dark, cold, adjourned with different kinds of weapons scattered here and there, huge desk in the middle and three monitors that took up the entire wall?
Almost grotesque.
But hey, who was she to judge the taste of Gotham’s criminals, right?
She probably should have been terrified, praying to every higher power to be saved by Batman, Red Hood, Robin or – damn – even Poison Ivy in the worst case, but for some reason she couldn’t bring herself to that particular emotion. It was like her brain refused to anchor in reality and everything turned into a freaking dream she was sure to wake up from any second now.
Though maybe getting back to reality in which Dick was still with Sienna and she was brokenhearted wasn’t really a good alternative.
Right. Dick.
Did he even notice her gone? Or was he too busy patching things up with his girlfriend, already forgetting about Y/N? The girl he claimed to love?
A kick in the back of the knees that send her to the floor (again) made her realize that while getting lost in her thoughts she missed the obviously very important and very detailed speech of the villain who was describing his wicked plan to take over the world and –
“Ouch!”
“Stupid bitch.”
“It hurts!” she tried to squirm away from the kicking but it was immensely hard with her hands still bound.
“Hold the fire, boys. Easy. The lady is our guest after all and this is not how we treat guests, is it?” The goons chuckled darkly, because clearly guests were deserving of a far more cruel and brutal treatment. “Now, now, don’t be scared little one. We won’t hurt you. Much. At least not until you give us what we want.”
The owner of a deep, husky voice, who clearly was the host of the party finally decided to step forward and show his face.
Well.
Not exactly showing his face.
***
“Could you at least tell me who we’re dealing with here?!” Dick muttered, keeping his voice low as he and Shadow pulled at the abandoned building on the outskirts of Gotham. “Do you even know?”
“Why? Does it matter?” Shadow joked “Would you use a different contingency plan for Riddler and another one for Two Face?”
“Could you please stop joking about it? This is my girlfriend we’re talking about!”
The emotions started to come to the surface, and Nightwing started becoming uncharacteristically scatter-brained.
“Idiot. Keep it down!” Shadow hissed, pulling him behind the corridor crease, miraculously avoiding the watchful gaze of the guardian. “Here’s what I get for putting myself at risk. Nightwing announcing his presence to the entire compound filled with criminals. Get yourself together. Or is it too hard for you?!”
Dick grimaced. He hated himself at the moment. For both losing his cool, especially in front of someone who could hold it against him and for missing on precious time since every second counted.
“Y/N. Think about Y/N.” he muttered to himself “She needs your help. Now more than ever.”
He took a few deep breaths, calming down the storm inside him to the point where he was actually in control and capable of turning the fear and concern into anger.
If anyone touched his Y/N….
“You back?”
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m back.” He opened his eyes, completely focused, eyes sharp, instincts on high alert. “Tell me who’s the fucker who dared to take her.”
“Black Mask.”
“Fucker.” The word left Dick’s lips without the involvement of his brain. That was how much he loved her. The golden boy, teasing, joking and playful nightwing turned into a machine, swearing and ready to freaking kill, almost Red Hood like.
“So? Ready to kick some asses?”
“After you.” The predatory smirk blooming on his face was a sign of incoming violence and spilling blood.
***
Her screams mixed with the ones coming from the corridor in a beautiful, gory cacophony of sounds. An ode painted with blood and pain. Maybe that was why for a longer moment no one in the room actually paid attention nor was willing to try and differentiate the sources of notes in the song.
Or maybe it was the fact that the goons’ cries were extremely high-pitched, almost reaching the same key as the yelling of a woman trapped in the torture machine, losing strength with every passing second.
“Oh no, no, no, no.” Black Mask laughed cruelly “you don’t get to pass out on me yet. Info first.” The iron grip on her wrist tightened even more, as if that was even possible, cutting into skin and muscle, amplifying the blood loss.
For the last whatever-time-passed she was kept on the edge of consciousness as if Black Mask was hoping that choking, hurting and injecting with some substance would cause her to lose inhibitions and finally blurt out the information he was so dead set on getting.
Who is Nightwing.
Who is Batman.
Any piece of information would turn out to be useful, but since the beginning of the questioning it became painfully clear that that stupid girl was either too weak or too strong to answer.
Too weak because it seemed that even the slightest amount of pain made her repeatedly pass out and too strong because on those intermittent periods where she actually was conscious and aware of the surroundings enough to talk was the one making her extremely stubborn and uncooperative.
And Black Mask was losing his patience.
Here he was, gracing that little scum with his presence instead of submitting her to the treatment of his lower men, with less than gracious methods and she had the audacity to be bratty.
A vicious circle in which he was using the moments to get information only to be refused, beating her again and ending up with a thoughtless body, achieving nothing, over and over again.
He should have just stuck to using his rat, skillfully planted in Gotham.
“Fuck!” he yelled seeing as once again she went limp on the chair only because he pulled her nail. “Stupid bitch!”
“Mmmmm…” Y/N muttered and for a moment the room was completely quiet save from her little whimpering.
And then –
“OUCH!”
“FUCK!”
“RETREAT!”
“The hell?” Black Mask walked to the door and looked through the peephole. “Fuck!” Seeing his guards and men being thrown in different directions, sounds of yelling and snapping bones alongside with blood streaming on the floor was not the best view before 7 p.m. and definitely not the best without his favorite drink. Under any other circumstances he would be giving zero fucks about the violence outside the safe door, but now – he had a plan to complete and no one, fucking no one would prevent him from succeeding.
The loud sound of a door’s guard crashing with the metal surface and pictorially sliding down with crushed skull caused Sionis to quickly recalibrate his plan.
Seemed like Red Hood was in the house. And not that Sionis was scared, but-
“Hold them back!” he yelled, grabbing the limp body of Y/N and rushing towards the safety exit, to the roof where his private jet was landed just in case of emergencies.
And this was clearly an emergency.
***
The door broke about 30 seconds after Black Mask rushed to the passage.
“You carry explosives with you everywhere?” Dick muttered, equally impressed and shocked.
“What? It comes in handy and -”
“AAAAH!” Both goons rushed at the two vigilantes before Shadow could finish a sentence, but their brave loud cries quickly turned to quiet, broken sobbing as they were laid down.
“Be a sweetheart and tell me where he went?” Nightwing leaned over the goon with an almost soft smile.
“mhm…” inert waving towards the passage was enough of an answer.
“Good boy. Thanks.”
***
“NO!!” she yelled as Black Mask was dragging her through the roof. Sudden realization of all the things that could go wrong making her much more valiant and strong. As long as she was still in Gotham and not exported to another city or – god forbid – country – could result in being deemed as another missing-without-trail- person.
That is – if someone was even looking for her in the first place.
Tears pricked in the corner of her eyes at the thought that she could be so easily forgotten.
And the terror she was holding back for so long, since the moment of being dragged into that black SUV, finally found a way out…
“NIGHTWING!!!”
***
“Y/N!!”
A dead man would hear that cry and even a dead man would rise from the dead at the sheer desperation beaming from the voice.
“Y/N!!! I’m coming!”
***
“You’re becoming a trouble!” Black Mask hissed, slapping her repeatedly, drawing another stream of blood this time from the broken lip.
“I – “
“I’m so done with you. Should have just killed you the second you turned out to be of zero significance to the cause. Now come here you little bitch-“
“No!!”
She blindly started to run away, only to trip (obviously) and ending up back in Sionis’ grip.
“NO!!”
He was too strong and she was too scared and stiff to fight anymore. Digging heels into the ground did no harm and was definitely no hindrance in being pulled towards the ledge of the 10-stories building.
“NO!!!!”
“Y/N!!”
Both the girl and Sionis froze for a moment as another male voice cut into the screaming match.
But it was too late.
***
“Go!” Shadow was probably the only one who didn’t lose cold blood. “GO!”
***
She was falling.
And it was beautiful.
Knowing that she would finally be free of all the pain, of all the heartbreak, of the guilt coming with betraying another girl by sleeping with someone else’s boyfriend. Liberated from being stuck in the memories of the past when she was actually happy, before everything went to shit.
“I love you Dick…” she whispered, finally crashing to the ground.
***
“Who the hell are you?!”
“Oh, come on, not this again!” Shadow hissed, extremely dissatisfied with the fact that everyone she encountered was far more interested in getting to know her personality, rather than fearing her killer skills.
For Black Mask it took a record time of ten minutes before calling defeat and ending up bound and being taken by the GCPD.
***
“Y/N.”
She opened one eye and much to her surprise found out that she was not a celestial body looking at her bloodied pulp of a body on the pavement.
“I love you too…” the warm embrace around her was welcomed but in time started to become a little suffocating and her battered body refused to be squeezed.
“Dickie…”
“Shh… shh, I got you.” He whispered again, caressing her hair, kissing her forehead, doing everything to assure both her and himself that it was all over and that he got her, that she was safe and he would never let it happen again. Never.
“H-How? W-what happened-? I – I thought-“
“You thought so little of me, didn’t you?”
“Idiot.”
“Hey!”
“Fucking prick! I swear if it wasn’t for this – “ she swung her injured arm in the air “I’d slap the hell out of you!”
“I saved you!”
“I almost died and you’re making jokes!”
Oh. Right. Maybe, just maybe given the circumstances it was slightly inappropriate.
“Sorry.”
“Yeah. You better.” She pouted, but he knew better, wiping the unshed tears. “It’s over.”
“Promise?”
“I promise.”
“What happened?”
“I’m an acrobat, remember? I jumped. And damn, I wish someone had that on video because it was really one of my best – Ouch! Ouch! Ok, ok! Stop it! Point taken!”
***
“How are we doing here?”
Once Sionis was seated in the back of a police car, hands were shaken and words of gratitude exchanged Shadow walked towards Dick and Y/n.
“I think she’ll live.” Dick teased with a smirk, predictably moving a safe distance away from his -- .
Right.
Maybe there was no happy ending after all with that messed up relationship thing hanging over their heads like a freaking axe.
“Can’t say the same about Nightwing though” Y/N pushed the thought away, settling on sending him a death stare for making fun of her again.
“Good. I’m glad.”
“I think you made up for whatever crime you were trying to redeem, Shadow. Thank you. I owe you. You saved my –“
“Girlfriend?” Shadow prompted, looking between Y/N and Dick, making them both blush in a bit of embarrassment.
“It’s complicated-“ they both said at the same time.
“Oh, trust me, it’s not complicated at all!” Shadow laughed
“What do you mean? You don’t know-“
“I know more than you think. Haven’t I proved that already?” Shadow turned around, making sure no one was watching and slowly took of her mask.
***
Fast forward. One week later.
Y/N was walking out of the hospital. It seemed like her arm was healing nicely and there were no complications, though her doctor was very stern while telling her she was supposed to rest and not get herself involved in any form of physical activity.
If he only knew that she was in a relationship with Gotham’s and Bludhaven vigilante.
“Y/N!”
Speaking of which, said vigilante was now honking at her from his Porsche.
“Showoff!”
“Get in loser, we’re going shopping!
She laughed and jumped inside the vehicle.
“You’re supposed to hold the doors open for me!”
“Mh. Missed you too, sunshine.” He leaned over the gearbox kissing her with a cheeky grin. “How’s the hand?”
“She’ll live.”
“Quoting me already, princess? Careful, I might think you consider me a superstar or something.”
“Idiot!”
“Ouch! You’re hurting me. But I’m willing to forgive you, giving the circumstances of late.”
He started the engine and took the way to the city.
“Yeah. Crazy, right?” her head fell onto the car’s headrest and she sighed heavily. “I mean – who would have thought…”
***
Flashback
“S-Sienna!?”
“Hey you two.”
“h-hey? What do you mean “hey”?! What is this?! Some sick joke?!”
In her stupor Y/N missed the fact that Dick was as shocked (if not more) as her. Hence it couldn’t have been any conspiracy against Y/N’s mental health.
“Whoa! Whoa! Relax!” Shadow Sienna raised her hands in surrender “Dick-“
“The hell?! How do you know? Damn it-!” he forgot about all the rules of safety and tore off his mask. Getting to the bottom of this shit was far more important.
“- I meant what I said. Really! About that redemption arc! Just – just listen to me!”
“Five minutes.”
“It was all a scheme-“
“Well let me tell you, your explanation is starting off the wrong foot” Dick groaned, pulling Y/N to his side to strengthen her mentally.
“I am Black Mask’s niece in the second line!” Sienna explained dramatically “wait-! Wait-! I have no loyalty to him! Not anymore!”
“One minute left.” Dick hissed
“It was all a plan. He had some vague idea about the ties between the one Dick Grayson and Batman and Y/N and wanted to use all of you against each other.”
“Thirty seconds.”
“Yes, fine! I was his spy for a moment, but then you two-. God! You love each other! And I just couldn’t- I couldn’t-“
Y/N wriggled out of Dick’s embrace and walked to Sienna, grabbing both her hands in her healthy one.
“Thank you.”
End of flashback
***
“I really hope you took your golden visa with you, cause I am about to go crazy with this shopping spree.”
“Hey. No limits on Bruce’s cards. He won’t even notice the loss of a couple thousands and I got my girl back, so-“
“I think we should send-“
“I already took care of that.”
After all the trouble and drama they got their happy ending.
***
In another part of town a certain girl found a fruit and sweet basket on her doorstep. With a little, but meaningful card.
It seemed like she found her happy ending too.
One in which she was no longer used by anyone and treated as a villain.
With the view for a future of freedom.
@miraculous-panic @fullbelieverheart @xlatinaaxx @ietss @arfrona
@gracescor3 @jaysgirlx @fuzzym4m4 @peachmartini @xenop0p @madness1999sworld
@leovergurl
#dick grayson x reader#nightwing x reader#dick grayson x you#nightwing x you#nightwing x y/n#dick grayson x y/n#dick grayson angst#nightwing angst
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୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅flu season - j. woll⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧
pairing: j. woll x fem!reader summary: It's flu season in Toronto and Joseph gets pneumonia. Oh no !! This is just a little snippet of Y/N taking care of him while his body fights against this virus. request: since woller is sick at the moment would you be able to write something where he’s not feeling well and you’re taking care of him? word count: 1019 warning(s): kinda short, not proof read notes: i had pneumonia over the summer and it was the worst experience of my life. i was dead for like two weeks and it took my 4 months to fully recover. really channeling that energy into this fic. i hope you love it !! xoxo
Your favourite grocery store was empty on this Thursday morning in January. It's cold but there is no snow on the ground. It's about 9 AM as you wander around the produce section, grabbing things to make soup for your sick boyfriend, who is currently lying at home with pneumonia.
Chicken, got it. Celery, got it. Carrots, got it. Noodles, got it. Might as well grab some cold medicine while you're here.Y ou stand in the checkout line and wait for the young girl (maybe no older than 18) to finish scanning your groceries.
"I can bag them, love, don't worry," you say, pulling out your debt card to pay. She smiles and says, "You have a lovely day".
"You too".
The drive home is long and tedious. Downtown Toronto is bustling now. People on their way to work, getting coffee, dropping their kids off at school. These are mundane moments you cherish. Dating a pro athlete is hard when all you want is some peace. He's always gone or busy. Sometimes it's nice to not have to rush home after work to head to a game or dinner or the gym.
You took work off today after Joseph's diagnosis yesterday. He was upset that he would be out of the Toronto Maple Leafs line up for the next few games. Taking the day off to take care of him was the least you could do to cheer him up. In fact, he practically begged you.
"Joey, baby, I'm home," you open the door to you shared condo and hear the tv from your bedroom. After setting down the grocery bags and your purse, you take off your coat and hang it up in the closet. Nothing has changed since you left your apartment earlier. You wander down the hall and into you bedroom, seeing Joe half-asleep, tucked into bed watching Big Bang Theory. Exactly how you left him.
He turns on his side slightly when he hears the door open. "Hmmm, you're home," he blinks slowly and smiles softly, sighing. It's good to see that he can take deep breaths without coughing a lung up. You make your way over to the bed and sit down beside him. He leans on you. "How are you feeling, sweetie?", you ask, running your fingers through his tangled hair. He just nod, "I'm feeling ok". You nod.
"Eat anything yet?"
He nods his head and points to the empty bowl on the nightstand, "Oatmeal with banana". "Good," you say in response, "I have the thermometer. Open wide". He does as he's told. The thermometer beeps after a few seconds under Joe's tongue. It reads 100.5 degrees. "Still have the fever," you say. You put your hand on his forehead, leave it for a second and then trace your fingers over his stubble covered cheek. "Ok, now antibiotics," you hand him two pills and a glass of cold water from his nightstand. He sits up a little bit and tosses back the pills. As he swallows, you give him a quick kiss on his warm forehead.
After being in a few long term relationships you have learnt a few things. One of those things being that when men are sick, all they want is someone to take care of them. They will listen to anything you say as long as you are helping them through their ailment. Whether it be a cold or cancer.
"I got your mom to send me her soup recipe. I'm gonna make a whole pot of it for the next few days," you open your phone and show him the recipe, "It's chicken noodle". He nods, "Sounds good". You get up to leave and get started on the soup, but Joe grabs your hand.
"What?" you turn, a confused look on your face. "Stay with me, baby, please," Joe looks up at you, his big blue eyes boring into your soul, like a little puppy. "I just ate. I'm not hungry and..." he fake coughs, leading him to cough very hard for real, "I'm sick".
You sigh. You really should get started on the soup, but he looks so sad and sweet, lying there waiting for you to lay down next to him. He pats the white comforter beside him as if to beckon you into his warm embrace. You smile and say, "Only for a bit, Joe. I need to start on the soup," while climbing in beside him.
About 45 minutes go by and Joe is fast asleep on your shoulder. You laugh slightly at the sight of his open mouth and the sound of his snores.
You called his mother yesterday to see if you could do anything to make him feel more at home (because Toronto in the winter is very different than St. Louis) and she said, "No, sweetheart, he just needs to rest. I'm a firm believer that sleep is the best medicine but that's especially true for our Joey. Been like that since he was a kid". Your remember the smile on your face when she said "our Joey". You had only met Shelley, his mom, once or twice, but she had been so welcoming that you felt like you'd known her for years.
Joe looks so peaceful while sleeping. He always does, but because he is sick, he looks it even more. You lean down slowly and go in to kiss him, but before you can, he wakes. "Hey there, Joey, feeling ok?" you say, with a small smile. He groans, stretching his back and arms, "Yeah. I feel better". He takes another deep breath and rubs his eyes. You smile and kiss his cheek, "Wanna come help me make the soup now?".
"Sure. Y/N?"
"Yeah?"
"Thank you for taking care of me. You're the greatest girlfriend ever. I'm gonna marry you one day. I promise."
You are slightly taken aback by his comment but, nevertheless, you smile. How lucky could you possibly be? Getting this perfect man and being able to call him yours. "Of course, Joe, I love you."
"I love you too, Y/N"
#⋆. 𐙚 ˚ angel writes#⋆. 𐙚 ˚ angel writes; joey#joseph woll#joseph woll fanfic#joseph woll x reader#joseph woll fluff#jw60 imagine#jw60 blurb#jw60 x reader#jw60#nhl fanfic#nhl fic#nhl fanfiction#nhl players#nhl fluff#nhl imagine#nhl goalies#hockey fanfic#hockey fluff#toronto maple leafs imagine
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All right, here’s round two of me trying to prove my point 😂 I promise I’ll get there.
So first of all, let’s look at this scene:
KHDR started setting us up for a premise of “True Light vs False Light”, and presumably, “True Darkness vs False Darkness”. In this example, false light is more or less described as treating someone you love in a bad or harmful way. So if love is the definition of light, how can that be the basis for “good”? Well, it isn't, because that’s not really a true form of love, is it? If you’re hurting someone, it’s darkness—even if it might be outwardly perceived as light.
No one has outright said “false darkness” yet, but it’s implied here. Clearly not all negative emotions manifest as darkness—again it relates to your relationship with other people and attempting to have power over them.
Larxene creates a perfect metaphor with Elsa’s completely neutral ice powers. Elsa fears her powers, and that fear is what leads to her hurting Anna and her kingdom. But she’s able to accept her magic thanks to Anna’s love and selfless sacrifice, which results in both becoming true lights.
Riku also has control of his fear and darkness due to his love for Sora:
So yes, KH says darkness is born from negative emotions:
But it always has to do with how they’re handled and how they lead someone to treat others, not merely their existence.
Here Sora embraces negative emotions and hurt with empathy & compassion, using them as an opportunity to connect with others. So again, negative emotions, even if they’re typically perceived as darkness, can’t directly equal true darkness. When used to help others, it’s still light.
Light encompasses more than just positive emotions, there’s more to it than meets the eye:
So if friendship is a form of light, it makes sense that darkness is out to divide people.
If it connects people and brings them together for good, it’s light. If it drives people apart and makes them harm each other, it’s darkness.
So I’m not at all saying “negative” emotions don’t play an important role—especially in regard to empathy and connecting people’s hearts with love. But light is necessary for that to happen, in order to keep those emotions from getting out of proportion and leading people to hurt others.
Additionally , if you’re just not convinced that “true light=goodness”, I guess that’s up to personal interpretation. But that’s at least the impression I get from the games. Even though he’s asking sarcastically here, Xehanort indicates pure light is what defines ‘right’.
And considering that this is a Disney story, it makes sense to me that true love/true light is the ‘order’ that guides the KH universe.
You know, your post saying Ven can’t wrap his head around why people would use the darkness is getting me thinking again about its nature and place in the setting. I hope it doesn’t end up being as evil as the narrative makes it out to be.
This is a super interesting ask, and I think to answer it honestly—I have to disagree a little, but I also do agree? Let me explain my thoughts.
Personally, I do think the narrative works best when “light” and “darkness” are literally interpreted as good and evil, creation and destruction, love and hatred, etc. The thing is, KH is clever and has made a point to specify that *true* light and darkness are a little different from what people might initially assume to be good and evil.
Of all the games, KHDR looks most deeply into what actually defines darkness. The best example off the top of my head is when they’re comparing the residents of Wonderland. Even though they all seem to harbor a negative emotion of ‘fear’, only the Queen manifests it as darkness in her heart. The difference being that she harms and executes others to maintain her power. We see how she is consumed by ire and lashes out at everyone. Xehanort argues that maybe her darkness is necessary to maintain order… but it’s not a good kind of order to make people live in fear, is it?
Conversely, what defines light? Some ‘light’ sided characters like Eraqus go around seeking to obliterate the darkness out of a hatred for it. (He justifies this by mentally separating darkness from people, but khdr confirmed that hearts and darkness are basically entangled in the modern era.) This sort of behavior doesn’t align with ‘true’ light though, as harming others is still what defines darkness. Of course, there are situations where fighting is required to protect people from harm—but even then, it’s not ideal to have to hurt anyone. When people have been hurt, it can be accepted and transformed into light / something ‘good’, or it can continue to manifest as darkness and become something cyclical that hurts others too.
The best understanding of light in KH is found in actions that stem from a desire to help and heal others. Take Kairi helping Sora come back from being a Heartless, for example. Even though he had fallen to darkness, she revived him with the power of her faith and love. Sora himself says that ‘deep down there’s a light that never goes out’ in every heart, and that ‘Kingdom Hearts is light’. This makes logical sense to me, if life and light are the same, you can’t be alive without light. And if that light never really goes out, neither does a person’s life. Hence why the heart is ‘never really gone’.
A lot of what KH asks comes down to—“what is a perfect world?” In the lore and fairytales of the series, light was a freely given gift from Kingdom Hearts—presumably in the form of hearts. What gave way to darkness was people attempting to selfishly claim that light for themselves and take it from others. This turns the world from order to chaos, and Kingdom Hearts disappears. Until it can truly return, there will still be darkness and suffering in the now-divided worlds. Coexistence and peace would be the ideal world order, but the conflict between light and darkness prevents it. Note that the real conflict between light and darkness is “darkness tries to possess light”, not “they both try to destroy each other”. I don’t think that true light, the kind that has ‘more than meets the eye’, is out to destroy darkness so much as to return it to light.
We don’t know everything about the True Darknesses yet, but Khux implies that they cast away their forms to conquer light, only to realize that their will would be lost without bodies. This is why they seek to ‘infect’ people’s hearts and stay alive through expansion, claiming more worlds and lights along the way. The Master of Masters claims they are entirely different from people, and yet we see Vanitas gain a heart—which by my logic before, wouldn’t even be alive without possessing at least some light, right?
So to answer your question, I do think darkness is “evil”, but only in the sense of being an absence or willful rejection of goodness / light. I think there’s a real chance the KH ending will be one of reconciliation and restoration. It would be pretty wonderful to see all of the true darknesses get their own forms and hearts again, especially if that puts an end to the conflict once and for all. Darkness isn’t completely bad to the extent of being irredeemable, but it is completely bad in that—on its own—it only causes an endless cycle of cruelty and pain to be inflicted on people. Just like you can’t fight fire with fire, you can’t fight darkness with darkness; light is the key necessary to make things right again.
So to explain my headcanon about Ven, we have to get into his mind as a pure-hearted person. He’s selfless and aims to share light rather than possess it for himself (or fight over it with others.) That’s how the ideal world is supposed to work, and it benefits everyone. So he doesn’t see the logic in hurting others to benefit only yourself. That will just make people hate you, right? Where’s the harmony in that? He values friendship above all else, so that’s why he can’t wrap his mind around people valuing other things (power) more and justifying harming others to gain them. That’s why ‘his friends are his power’. Because if you have the light of friendship, you don’t need to take power from others or use the power of darkness to feel fulfilled.
Thanks for the ask!! I hope this explanation makes sense 😅
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told my mum i wanted to do more cosplay stuff soon (for pride).. turned out i forgot that she wont be in the country when thats happening :/
#she and my sister are going to canada for 2 weeks#their going to one of my mum's cousins (? i think its her cousin. smn from her side of the family) wedding#i didnt wanna go since traveling would be too hard on me for 2 weeks tbh#my mother (other parent) will also be gone during that time for a different business trip#so guess who is gonna need to probably get public transport while in cosplay :x#atleast the one in my county is easy to get to#just 2 busses from here#might be able to get someone to drive me there?#need to see which of my friends are going aswell actually. they might be able to drive (idk if any of them actually have a car but i guess#i will find out. they prob dont tho)
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*a girl that is going to be okay.jpg*
#it's truly a pity for several and obvious reasons that same-sex marriage isn't legal here#(one of them being that i might not be able to get married with someone i love ever lmao)#and one of them is that i can't platonically marry by best friend and i would :(#for benefits and for the plot#we once again proved to each other that we're a great couple (of besties)#and also it just sucks that it's not an option and i know how much it hurts my friends and how much it might hurt me in the future#anyway#the day started not great but then i met with said bestie and we went grocery shopping and to ikea and i was driving this time#bc it's usually her being the driver between the two of us#and it was fun and i love her and my day got so much better#agnes talking
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"what could possibly go wrong?"
#oops <doodles a cairo on the bus. and the train. and miscellaneous other public transportation>#cheerwives part two because i drew a riley and got obsessed ig#i had to go to School and Travel today (it is the middle of the school holiday week break to study. i'm mildly annoyed)#so this is me coping via the blorbo system#also i've realised rendering on my phone is Fun and so is painting faces#lowkey iffy about the proportions on this one but shhhb the sentiment gets across#part of this was based off how someone liked a very old watt post of mine so while i was looking for a watt doodle to render for funsies#up came a very old image of cairo asking what could possibly go wrong and so. repaint over it i guess! if you go into the artchives#(haha art archives) you might be able to find it#we are the tigers#watt#not driving the narrative not doomed by the narrative but a secret third thing(in the narrative nonetheless)#thinking back to the hadestown watt au that i never made proper stuff for#it spins in my head and gives me a bit of happiness#anyways i think my physics teacher is very Done with me submitting assignments at 2359 but unfortunately i haven't learnt. going to go back#(because i'm still at the mall. gotta walk back) and finish up stuff! yikes the revision season be upon ye i guess#there's another version of this digital painting with cairo half smiling and mouth clearly open to say smth#but unfortunately i dislike the colours in that one a bit and it looks too similar to this one to warrant posting them tgt#so instead of a before and after thing you simply get a cairo portrait haha#yes okay bye *disappears into void*#initial caption for this was. nooo don't ask what could possibly go wrong?'' you're so sexy aha#if it matters to anyone. just fyi
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life is so weird
#also am I just learning to summon better and better people as life goes on#cuz theres like 2 ppl who follow these tag rants from me so you might know but like. my luck is so bad#but i fell out of probably the eorst year of my life and built a somewhat stable foundation and now it just feels wrong#like oof#i still love james right but I'm tiptoeing into a relationship with someone sweet in a different way#and I make lots of spare money to buy fun shit#paying off my loans which i never imagined being able to do well#and i can drive i have furniture I actually like i have both of my cats I like my job too bc its genuinely challenging and not 100% monotone#the only thing id improve is the amount of exercise I get but thats partly due to the weather and school traffic preventing me from biking#to work anymore#its crazy#crazy crazy#whats next I'm gonna be able to visit my friends whenever? and do hobbies comfortably? take my jangle to a vet?#insane#and ofc im waiting for the floor to drop obviously and it also feels like i dont deserve any of this but its also just. nice#personal#ignore me#idk#anyway#updates for my concerned parties even tho I brushed yall off at my darkest for selfish reasons and wallowing
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everyday i'm closer to making gifs again, such as making aback up of ewvery thing ive hoarded on my alptop so far so my little lappie can run smoothly again and i can start hoarding every thing agaibn
#today i'll be deleting every thing off my cloud so my laptop stops crying about it being over the limit#i checked it once i checked it twice everything better be saved on the drive or else#and then copy off everything that it tried to upload but hasnt been able to do so for.... a month#AND THEN i back up my laptop#you see there is a method to my madness#if someone offers to take me home 👀 i might even get my last wishlist pc from th epost officve#completely unrelated to my hard drive things i just saw that im off sooon#SOON#so fuckinh sooong#sorry about the atrocious typos i simply cannot coordinate my hands in a way that would make me coherent
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need Guz to hug me tightly for like an hour solid oh my god dhdjdkl I went driving for the first time in over a year and I chewed my lip raw 😭😭
I'm starting to look like a caricature of Anxiety with all these physical symptoms and signs LMAO
#this is so ridiculous fhfjdkdl#i do not like driving fjdkdl i know i should not be on the roads#but unfortunately i have to bc i live rural and also my parents insist i ''just need more practice''#practice is not going to fix the dissociation 😭😭 practice will not fix the Other Drivers being shitty and scary and reckless fjfkdl#it might make it slightly easier bc i wont have to think as hard about shoulder and mirror checks and roadsigns and speed limits#and where i am located on the road and intersection rules and whatnot#but like... it does not fix that i live in a town (and world lol) where ppl are fucking bonkers on the road#i had someone riding my ass for like a full five minutes. we had only two feet btwn us. MAYBE. IF THAT MUCH.#he was BIG mad that i was going the speed limit#and THERES A POLICE STATION LIKE RIGHT NEAR THAT AREA MY GUY IM NOT GONNA GO OVER THE SPEED LIMIT RIGHT THERE LMAO ????#also im a rule follower usually so i do tend to go Exactly the speed limit fjfkdl#and maaannn that makes people SO fucking angry dhfjdl its impossible to drive Anywhere without having someone right on ur bumper#its so ridiculous like... that's not helping anyone ??? ur not getting to ur destination faster by riding up on somebodys ass ???? hewwo ???#ANYWAYS. i drove around the neighborhood and then went up the highway and thru some intersections and then into the main core of town#and then i got my dad to take over from there bc it was lunch hour and the core of town is a lawless land at the best of times#MY NERVES ARE FRIED. i need Guz to act as a weighted blanket or one of those pressure therapy vests for me LOL#im like... shaking fhdjsl that was far more than i thought we were going to do for driving today good lord#IM OKAY THOUGH I SURVIVED I DIDNT EVEN HIT A CURB OR ANYTHING#i think I've only hit a curb once so far in all my times driving and that was on my second time driving on a road i think#so pretty good track record... im a very careful driver fjdkdl i work so hard to be safe and drive smoothly#during my driving test the only thing the test guy had to critique was that i waited at an intersection when i could've gone#but the reason i waited was bc i wasnt sure i could make it across the traffic lane before the oncoming vehicle got to us#so it was like. a safe decision overall but a little too hesitant which can actually be unsafe fjdkdl#AUGH ANYWAYS SORRY FOR RAMBLING SM#driving stresses me out so bad and my lip is all raw now and i have so many physical stress symptoms the past few days fhfjdl#after tonight i should be able to calm down a bit hopefully fhfkdl theres a thing we're going to tonight thats been stressing me out so bad#but after tonight it'll be over and hopefully I can get myself settled down again fjfjdkl#dandy.cmd#vent //
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invited my cousin to the thing wednesday i feel so awkward
#i feel bad inviting ppl to things it feels so invasive and also with this specifically i like havent seen her in person for 3+ years#+ i dont actually know a ton of details abt anything regarding my bday celebration bc my mom kinda decided most of it for me WHICH IS MY#FAULT for not taking the initiative but idrk here to start with it like idk how to tell my mom Ok i can plan my own bday thing bc i dont and#also i dont rly have most of my relatives contact info so even if i was planning my own bday thing itd still be like. id have to go to my#mom and be like ummm can you ask papaw to come 🫴 i forgot abt that fucking emoji omg. i used to use that emoji all the time i think or smth#but ya. ITS EMBARASSING so i feel stupid being like hey do you want to come to my birthday celebration bc idt itll rly be a party and we#will order steak n shake I dont know if everybody pays for themselves or if my family pays or if im paying or anything and also idk if we#will be doing anything fun at all and also i dont know who all will be there or what time or how many . Do you want to come#LIKE THATS A CRAZY THING TO ASK SOMEONE. BUT WHATEVER#i also want to invite my other cousin but 1 hes a minor so idt he can come over on his own he might be able to drive already idr#2. i like never talk to him on snap hes cool and everything and i see him in person more than i see mads his sister but i feel weird#never textung and then being like hey get your mom to drive you to my ambiguous ass event where every single variable is at present unknown#ti me and also 2 days notice be there or be square
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My eczema is actually driving me out of my mind I swear to fucking god
#i have had this recurring patch of dyshidrotic eczema on my right middle finger for 6 months now (i searched around to find the exact#duration lol)#i looked on the subreddit and my situation is nowhere near as severe as a lot of people’s so i feel very lucky due to that#like there’s people whose entire hands are covered in it and i just have a patch of it on my middle finger#plus a few recurring patches of more ‘average’ eczema/dermatitis#my left pinky knuckle; the space between my left middle and ring finger; the inside of my right wrist; and the outer side of my right hand#are the recurring spots but i don’t get bumps there. just reddened; itchy and cracked skin#the bumps are just on my right middle finger but they drive me CRAZY#i can’t knit or write with a pen while the bumps are there because i’ll burst them and if that happens i Really won’t be able to knit#because it hurts too much#i’m trying to make christmas gifts and the whole side of my middle finger is just a bunch of tiny cuts#i’m so sick of it!!!! it doesn’t seem to respond to my normal steroid cream (betnovate) or my hand lotion (gloves in a bottle)#it has to have been sparked by an allergy but i can’t for the life of me figure out what it is. i first noticed this happening#when i started cooking from scratch a lot earlier this year. i blamed my wooden spoon for rubbing up against the side of my middle finger#but switching to a silicone spoon hasn’t helped. i only started using nail products in like august-september and this had been going on#for months by then. i mean i literally only quit being a lifelong nail biter in late july#i feel like going to the doctor is the only way i’ll get this fixed but i feel embarrassed because it’s SUCH a mild case#like i could absolutely just chuck a band aid on it and get all my christmas gift knitting done. but jesus CHRIST man#maybe i’ll see if i can get hydrocortisone via boots online. it might respond to a different steroid maybe#i have very little faith in antihistamines because this shit was if anything worse during the summer when i was taking fexofenadine#but i might take nytol anyway because fuck this#personal#ETA because i know someone is going to suggest that my pen/needle/spoon grip is stupid and i should adjust it to prevent this:#i have SUCH bad dyspraxia it’s not even funny. learning new motor skills or a new muscle memory takes me such an unbelievably long time#i’d rather put up with the eczema than spend like a year relearning how to knit#the spoon i will try to hold in a more encompassing hand grip and i’ve been trying to avoid handwriting for a long time but needles….. no
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[ 18+ blog || minors DNI ]
"I hate what you're doing to your body."
That's because you're comfortable as who you are. I'm not. That's why I'm changing. You can hate it all you like but it's necessary for me.
unless you wanna write my obituary, of course.
being dead sounds just as relieving as transitioning.
#vent post#vent#ftm#my fam when I asked if I could get a drive down to the hospital for top surgery next year#there's some level of irony in the idea that a nurse hates the idea of medical transitioning#like bro Im doing this to stay alive#I stopped doing a lot of things I loved to do because of dysphoria - my depression stems from the fact Im not who Im supposed to be#these are steps towards me finally being able to do the shit I used to love again - to finally feel comfort and happiness with myself#none of my decisions are made lightly - surgery is a necessity for me and has been deemed as such by my docs#this is FOR ME not for you#my dypshoria got so much worse since this exchange#being supportive really goes a long way#please try to be supportive#or at least consider whether or not something is just not your thing and dont let it cloud your judgement#everyone is different - everyone has different likes and dislikes - different requirements and needs that have to be met#you are not the main character of this story - you dont dictate anothers bodily autonomy - and thats okay#instead of making someone else your business bc u dont feel comfy about it - try educating yourself#find a diverse amount of sources - talk with anyone with experience in regards to the topic - keep your mind open#who knows - you might learn something neat
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.
#having A Time tonight#super very emotional talk with my dad and sister#said some things i shouldn't have and im regretting saying anything at all#i really should have just apologized and shut the fuck up#instead i got the knowledge that i cannot tell my dad anything in confidence#and tgat even my siblings can see my parents treat me differently#like to the point where if i pissed off one of my parents enough they wanted to kick me out my other parent wont stop them#literally something my sibling brought up#and what am i doing tomorrow? immediately backtracking and apologizing for everything!#because yes i was abused and neglected but i hurt my dads feelings and made my mom angry so i need to say sorry#honestly i just need to keep it all in until i can get out of here#just wait until then and i wont ever have to speak with them ever again#might still talk ti my dad but idk probably not. i think im too upset with him rn to make that decision#i mean he did pretty much tell ms to my face that he will always side with my mother so#i want out someone help me please#i need a job a place to stay and some way to get places (i cant drive)#just a little bot longer and my schooling will be done and i will have my license and i can work#i cant wait im so excited to work again and be able yo save up and LEAVE
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'BUTCH MANIFESTO'
inspired by 'FEMME SHARK MANIFESTO' by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha
(ID under cut)
Ko-Fi (Commissions Open!)
[ID: an original poem titled 'BUTCH MANIFESTO'. the stanzas are all on the left side of the page and lineated, except for the first line, and last stanza. Poem begins:
Listen up! Butches hold it down! We don’t spend hundreds of pounds on designer clothes and black and white tuxes – we shop off the charity shop rack, hand-me-downs from our bois, our men, our women. Butch is not a glamour word - Butch is not for the white collars in their 9-5 and their office parties, Butch is not for the woman in a police uniform with short cropped hair, Butch is not for the masc who looks down on our femmes, Butch is not for the dumbass white people who call themselves stud, like our people haven’t taken enough from black lesbians, Butch is not for the politician or the soldier, it’s for those of us who get shit done and don’t throw anyone under the bus; who stand between our loved ones and the white-knuckled fist; it’s for the people who take a breath of relief when they get home and get to lay their head on the shoulder of their baby and say, it’s hard, and I need you right now; it’s for those of us with hard-soled feet, worn by hours of standing, just so people can buy some useless shit on a Sunday. Butch is for the primary school teachers, the neighbour keeping your package safe, the hairstylist, the barber, the youth worker, the locked up, the sectioned, the evicted, the boy on the dole. Butches hold each other up, Butches stand up for communities, no matter how different we might be.
Butches stand up for Butches, because only we know the shit we face, we don’t argue over what butch looks like for someone - their struggle doesn’t counteract ours. We’re brothers, sisters, siblings, lovers, mentors, we don’t fight over femmes or fight each other. We help up our siblings who can’t hold themselves up and shouldn’t have to.
Butch is recognising our hurt, our pain, and making sure nobody has to go through that, in the very least not alone. Butch is not reproducing that hurt, butch isn’t the transfem exclusion, the toxicity, it’s driving our girls and boys to the abortion clinic, it’s holding your femme’s hair back over the toilet bowl, it’s telling your darlin’ to take a deep breath, before you poke the needle into her thigh, it’s holding back on punching the catcaller because you know it’ll put your lover in more danger, it’s fishing in your closet for an old, dusty dress for your questioning girl, it’s never calling the cops, it’s carrying the Narcan, it’s gathering the funds for bail, it’s tipping the waiter, it’s kissing the bruised chin of a fellow butch who’s built like a brick shithouse.
Butch is not all muscle, able-bodied, white Butch is not all skinny and androgynous Butch is care Butch is NURTURE. Butch is a cane and an unsteady step Butch is putting down the ramp Butch is wheeling up it Butch is addict Butch is straight-edge Butch is diaspora Butch is desi Butch is antiracist Butch is socialist Butch is punk Butch is black Butch is brown Butch is fat Butch is fat-loving Butch is mental illness Butch is antipsych Butch is autism Butch is trans Butch is anger Butch is tears Butch is grief Butch is the old bull Butch is the closeted kid in a dress Butch is the baby dyke wearing a rainbow flag cape Butch is smile lines Butch is crinkled eyes Butch is crying in your friend’s beat-up car Butch is foetal position Butch is pink Butch is motherhood Butch is fatherhood Butch is cat-dad Butch is fucking Butch is getting fucked Butch is stone Butch is bashful Butch is humble Butch is cocky Butch is proud Butch is single Butch is uneducated Butch is poet Butch is poetry Butch is council estate Butch is gentleness Butch is bones and spit and the soft curve of our lower backs the clenched jaw under a double chin the hard-eyes that any femme can see right through the estradiol the testosterone the carabiner clink the thick hands the cellulite the bloody pads the tampon string the mood swings the sagging tits the top surgery scars the swinging cock the hairy pussy the protruding t-dick the leather harness.
Butch is eternity Butch is sewn into the fabric of atoms Butch is love and solidarity Butch is never leaving anyone behind and never selling anyone out.
End poem. In the bottom right corner, the poet is signed as 'Ren H.' End ID].
#writing#my writing#original poetry#butch#butch poetry#butch4femme#butch4butch#butch4stud#butch4both#most popular#most proud of#butch4all#poetblr#image described#described#writeblr#poetry#original writing#original poem#butch femme poetry#lesbian poetry
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evening dedicated to The Horrors
#i just need to fucking vent man#i cannot fucking live like this anymore#i still dont have the tags for my car and its almost been a year#a whole year where i didnt go ANYWHERE but work and home and sometimes special occasions when i felt i could risk it#and the daily agonizing fear of being pulled over again and getting a ticket that i cant afford because i cant afford to pay for my tags#ive gotten one of those smart watches that can track your heart rate and stress and im genuinely developing a heart problem from stress#when i was driving home tonight i think i mightve had an arrhythmia which was a scary feeling#im going off of caffiene from here on out because im starting to be afraid that i might have a heart attack#im twenty fucking five years old and im so stressed and scared about money that im afraid of a heart attack#i miss being able to go and do things and just get out of my generally shitty house#i feel like i would be a totally different person if this was just finally taken care of#someone who doesnt feel like they need to hospitalize themselves because the neverending stress is making you suicidal#because it feels like it’ll never end and i’ll be scared and hurting forever#because how the fuck am i gonna get almost $2000 when im going through a garnishment#like i can barely afford to pay all my billa#fuck i CANT even pay my bills my mom is covering my phone bill this month#because i’d have to choose between car insurance or a phone#and god for fucking bid i ever lose my insurance#the level of fear i would have just trying to get to and from work would kill me#and the longer this goes on the more i wonder if that might actually happen#im smoking way more because im stressed. i cant sleep because im stressed. i cant eat because im stressed.#all things that preclude some pretty serious cardiovascular problems#i have a doctors appointment on tuesday to discuss my heart#im nervous for it but who knows#i have had an exceptionally high heart rate but maybe the arrythimia was just psychosomatic#my money troubles have completely stopped my life and i cant see a way out#i feel like im drowning and like im going clinically insane#i was outside sitting in our carport and a cop drove by and i was so terrified i spent 10 minutes hiding in an empty room#looking through the blinds to see if they were gonna come do something#i am so afraid that i have considered quitting my job because the commute is so stressful and upsetting
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