#mia would DESTROY chris

[grimmsnarlll]

being a multishipper is fun because on one hand i love mithan and on the other hand i love winterfield and on one foot i want them to be a happy polycule and on the other foot i want mia and chris to be constantly beefing

[thegamingcatmom]

Anon making way through resi 8 for miri

Mia telling us Ethan wasn't normal

And then we see Ethan waking up???!

Why is it so moving to just see him despite him supposedly being dead and despite that info and talking to Eveline, his only thought is his daughter and he has to save her it's just so touching like 🥺

Also the Duke finds him and is taking him to miranda good man he is

Miri gets the baby

Starts dripping mold from one eye

And then she starts to weaken? With Eva taking form???

But also the fight afterwards

Is like??? The most elegant fight so far?? Like she's just gliding around with wings at points and she's so graceful despite well the whole situation of her trying to kill Ethan

Ethan after that fight holding rose and breaking down?!

I cry at him giving rose to Chris

Telling her to be strong take care of her

And then he pushes them away to sacrifice himself so they can escape I-☹️🥺😢😭

Also the end scene of rose grown up

(MOSTLY) MIA RANT UNDER THE CUT.

(Sorry not sorry.)

Mia telling us Ethan wasn't normal

Yeah, the fact that Mia knew her hubby was "special" makes me wonder just how and when she came to that conclusion? I mean, she´s probably been prescripted her meds right after the Baker incident, so I guess that did raise the question of whether her husband has sustained some lasting "damage" as well. Or maybe it´s more the fact he didn´t show any lasting damage in the first place? Maybe that´s what urged her to investigate? Can´t get the researcher out of a girl, after all...

But like, did she secretly take a sample of his blood and had it checked or smt? (Something I can totally see her doing, btw.) Did he cut himself with a knife at some point and, due to his insane regenerative abilities, his wound closed up so quickly that Mia just drew the conclusion? ANYHOW-

Mia is basically a much less unhinged version of Miranda. Their freaks match so well in a way that is absolutely sinful, and I will forever be smad that we got Ethan instead of Mia as the protag in Village. Like, can you imagine the sexual tension of two mothers facing off in a battle for what each of them considers hers?? Can you imagine their lines as well?? You can bet your ass they would´ve destroyed each other through verbal sparring alone because yall just know my girl Mia ain´t a pushover. She´s the kind of woman who, as Ethan put it, "is scary when she gets angry."

...I fully believe that.

(She was going easy on Chris here, cmon.)

I mean, just look at her eyes. That fire, that passion.

THE FINGER. ☝️💀

Yall know shit´s getting real when The Finger comes into play. 😭

A mother´s love is the most powerful force on earth, and both Mia and Miranda would stop at nothing to get back what is theirs. Now, imagine all that fire COMBINED, I-

...Also-

CAN SOMEONE PLS TELL ME WHAT "EXPERIMENTS" MIA HAS BEEN PUT THROUGH IN MIRANDA´S LAB, PLS AND TY. 🫠

I mean-

At least Birb Momma made sure Mia wouldn´t freeze? I guess? Like, that is firewood in the gif there, right? ...Right?? 👀

AND ALSO-

Let´s not forget she was gonna whack who she probably thought was Miranda over the head when Chris opened her cell. I would´ve LOVED to see Miranda´s reaction. Maybe Mia´s tried pulling that stunt before and Birb Mama was just like-

PLS TELL ME YALL SEE THAT DYNAMIC TOO?? 😭

I also wanna know what her plans were for Mia once she would´ve gotten Eva back. Like, would she have just "forgotten" about her? Gotten rid of her?

...Or maybe she had different plans entirely? 🫠

(Is my current WIP kinda blending into this post? Mayhaps. 🤷🏻‍♀️)

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SIDERANT:

I rewatched some of Chris´s part to study Mia´s behavior when she spills the beans, and at the beginning of the vid he was like "I took Ethan in case Miranda infected him" and it got me thinking.

Like, yknow, it never occured to me that the Ciorbă de Legumes Miranda!Mia was cooking up at the beginning of the game might actually contain CADOU???? WHA- 💀

I mean, I just always assumed she was gonna poison him or smt. Yknow, just kill him slowly and painfully right then and there so she wouldn´t have to deal with him anymore. But the more I think about it, the more it makes sense.

Mia sending her husband to put their daughter to bed is totally something a doting mother and wife would do. Absolutely. But, in the context of Village, it would also absolutely make sense for Miranda to get Ethan off her back long enough to be able to add a lil extra "seasoning".

And then we see Ethan waking up???! Why is it so moving to just see him despite him supposedly being dead and despite that info and talking to Eveline, his only thought is his daughter and he has to save her it's just so touching like

I thought the whole thing was sad af. Ethan realising he´s been a dead man walking all along - both figuratively and literally - is just so tragic. The only thing that keeps him going is his daughter, which only adds salt to the wound, really.

And then you have Eveline mocking him like-

😭😭😭

Also the Duke finds him and is taking him to miranda good man he is

Yeahhh, tbh? To this day, I don´t quite know what to make of the Duke. He´s not really "evil", but he´s no saint either. He´s doing what he´s doing mostly because it benefits him in one way or another. If he doesn´t think a good deal will come of it, I doubt he´ll bother.

With that said, I think the main (if not the only) reason he rescued Ethan was to "get back" at Miranda for destroying his source of income, aka: the village and its people.

I´d love to think of the Duke as an honorable man, but...sad reality is: he´s probs not. At least not the canon version. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Starts dripping mold from one eye And then she starts to weaken? With Eva taking form???

The mold dripping from one eye is Miranda weakening, yes. And the reason her power is leaving her is actually Rose herself (or so I´ve read). Even as a baby, Rose is so powerful that the "data" (Eva´s consciousness) can´t get through. Her lil body is instinctively pushing back against an invasive force, so Eva never actually gets the chance to "take form." It´s Rose all along, which is why Miranda is so upset in the first place.

Rose basically "saps" Miranda´s powers.

"My power...is leaving me!"

But also the fight afterwards Is like??? The most elegant fight so far?? Like she's just gliding around with wings at points and she's so graceful despite well the whole situation of her trying to kill Ethan

IKR. Birb Momma is just a feast for the eyes in pretty much every situation, ain´t she?? She´s beauty, she´s grace-

SHE´LL FLAP YOU IN THE FACE WITH THEM GIANT WINGS. 🪽

Ethan after that fight holding rose and breaking down?! I cry at him giving rose to Chris Telling her to be strong take care of her And then he pushes them away to sacrifice himself so they can escape I-☹️🥺😢😭

I ugly cried during this. I still do, every time I see it. Ethan´s death was just so unexpected and heartbreaking after everything he´s been through. Like, that man fought his way through hell TWICE to get his family back, so I didn´t expect his ending to be so tragic. I didn´t think he would be gone for good, yknow? He deserved better. 😭

Village was the first Resi game I cried over. 😢

Also the end scene of rose grown up

Yeah, always gets me teary eyed. So bittersweet. 🥹

Btw, there´s a DLC called "Shadows of Rose" that I highly recommend you play/watch. I myself haven´t played it yet cause I wanna finish Village first, but that´s the next game on my list. It features more Birb Momma as well ofc, and, this time around, she´s even more unhinged, if you can believe it. That woman´s OBSESSED, lemme tell ya. The LINES she drops-

"You are mine now."

UHSJAHSDFKAJSFKALSDF

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Thanks for your ask and congrats on finishing Village! 💋💪

[tenebraevesper]

Sonic X: The Perfect Chaos Plant

So, last night I had a really weird Sonic X dream and I decided to share it because it was also kinda metal. X3

The dream takes place inside some kind of school that had been invaded by some generic Sonic characters at night, who called themselves ''pirates'' and were after some kind of treasure inside that school (it wasn't mentioned, but I assume there was a Chaos Emerald hidden inside it).

It was also revealed that the school at that moment was also overtaken by some kind of green and black plant monster made out of vines and red spots resembling eyes across it's body. That plant monster actually resembled Perfect Chaos (only a bit sleeker and more snake-like with vines around its body), but it also reminded me of Eyesmon due to the red eyes across its body, and it could be controlled via Chaos Energy.

How do I know that it was controlled via Chaos Energy? Because Shadow was already inside the school, feeding the plant monster Chaos Energy and using it to fight off the pirates. However, at the same time it seemed that the plant sort of controlled him, because it would also grow on its own and Shadow didn't seem to be too aware of the destruction he was causing.

The other two characters present inside the school were Tails, Cream and Cheese, and I assume they were also there for the Chaos Emerald alongside Shadow, but were now here to stop him from destroying the building, with Tails even saying how Shadow lost control over the plant. Sonic, Amy and Knuckles were said to be MIA for some reason (I assume they were fighting Dr. Eggman somewhere else).

Shadow is then seen smirking, enveloped in a green glow and the monster plant grows again, breaking part of the roof and forming a Perfect Chaos-like head, and you can see outside the human characters of the Thorndyke household (Chris, Chuck, Tanaka, Ella), quite horrified at what was happening and hoping that Tails would be able to figure out how to stop both Shadow (supposedly under the control of the plant) and the monster plant itself. A vine also breaks out, holding the Vice Principal, who was inside the school (at night!) for some reason, and she is screaming how Shadow is the worst student they ever had at this school.

Honestly, this makes me assume that Tails, Cream and Cheese, and Shadow had somehow enrolled in the school to find the Chaos Emerald (idk, maybe it was an undercover mission?) and then this happened.

The dream then ends with the Perfect Chaos Plant rearing its head and roaring. The inside of the school is covered in dark green and black plants and vines, with Tails, Cream and Cheese on their way to the heart of the plant to break Shadow out of the plant's control.

#Sonic Cyber Revolution (Masterlist)

[sodiumpentothol]

Some really bad ideas for a shitpost Hollow Knight x Resident Evil AU I randomly conjured

Here's the very poorly written outline I have for this thing:

Precursor to downfall of hallownest, umbrella (needs a different name) formed by soul master after pale king yeets the infection at them and goes "find cure." This is before the infection gets all wacky silly and publicly known, so soul master and the soul twisters sorta poke around with the infection and go "huh y'know this would make for a great weapon against the deepnest beasts" so they begin fucking around with that. Chris and Leon are both city guards that are vibing around when a sector of the City of Tears is overrun by the T-virus after an outbreak, they both end up having to stop it and both manage to resist the infection which piques the Pale King's interest. Jill and Carlos also make it out alive. Sherry and Claire are there too I guess. Pale King goes "yo dudes you survived the infection I think ima assign you guys to deal with this infection bullshittery" so they're all forced to do infection bullshittery stuff as it gets worse. RE4 is just a corpse creeper outbreak in fungal wastes or something, hornet is kidnapped and PK goes "holy shit if we don't get this child back then i'm gonna be in deep(nest) shit" so they all go and grab hornet. RE5 I don't even know, that was a fever dream and same goes for RE6. Ethan supposedly lost Mia in the initial infection outbreak all those years ago, but in reality Mia managed to escape with a void construct created by a rival gang of angry deepnest weavers. Void construct of course is Eveline and Mia and Eveline manage to flee to deepnest where they meet a nice little family of survivors. Eveline does her bullshittery and takes over everyone, weaver gang breaks lucas out and makes him their spy.

Meanwhile Eveline makes Mia send Ethan a letter to come and find her, thus starting RE7. Ethan goes to deepnest and gets his shit fucked up big time, immediately dying and being resurrected by the void. Blah blah blah, kill baker family, blah blah, get mia back, blah blah blah blah blah kill eveline, something something oh hey PK's Infection Cleanup Crew (TM) is now on the scene and here to deal with the outbreak. Ethan and Mia are pulled out and placed into witness protection in the Ancient Basin by the White Palace. RE8 happens when Mirander comes along and steals Rose. Mirander's still trying to revive her kid, but she's also the leader of the angry weaver gang and she has plans to kill PK. She's been gathering forces n shit for the revolt, also they're all infected with void and have wacky void powers too. Mirander steals Rose a little more blatantly, pretty much just breaking into the winters' house, fucking shit up, stealing the baby, and leaving. Ethan is reasonably pissed and goes all Seek And Destroy on Mirander, killing literally everything in his way. First he rampages through deepnest, killing four of her infected subordinates one by one before he makes it to the Abyss. At this point in the timeline PK has been dabbling a little in void bullshit so there's definitely evidence of him being around here, maybe a couple thousand dead children or something. Mirander is hiding out in the abyss, blah blah blah she and Ethan duke it out blah blah they both fucking die blah blah blah rose grows up to be very OP, PK briefly considered using herasa backup HK but Rose has a mind to think, a will to break, and a voice to cry suffering so she's automatically pitched from the plan and ends up being trained to like kill the fucking radiance or something, maybe she gets put into stasis or whatever because she was too powerful and PK felt threatened by her.

Something something hallownest falls something something main HK game takes place and the knight is now in the picture. Leon, Chris, Jill, and Carlos have taken it upon themselves to keep everybody in Dirtmouth safe and regularly dive into Hallownest to look for survivors. They meet Hornet sometimes but she's too badass to vibe with them and she fights them. They all survive of course and they learn to respect each other but Hornet never really joins them. She's like Ada that way. Anyway the knight comes along, yadda yadda yadda HK game happens

[laurarolla]

This didn't take very long at all. I don't know how long I was expecting it to take, but there was certainly enough time for the story they were trying to tell. Shadows of Rose is a wonderful final note on the theme that most strongly runs through the Ethan Winters storyline: familial trauma. Spoilers after the break but I'm maybe a bit proud of this post so if you don't mind those, please read on.

Quick comment on mechanics: The new powers are nice to use, and the ability to freeze the very wiggly enemies of a modern Resident Evil game in place is very satisfying. There's just enough combat here, but maybe a tad bit too much stealth. The section that basically feels like "oh, people like those Weeping Angel things from Doctor Who, let's do that" felt more annoying than scary or tense to me. The final boss is satisfying and does leave me wondering what a full Resident Evil game with those kind of powers would actually feel like, but it's probably best to keep it contained. I can definitely see a future where RE9 turns into the next RE6 for the franchise, and I'm sure Capcom wants to avoid that outcome.

Resident Evil 7 centered on the horror associated with a tragedy involving a family and an abused child. The worst events of the story were sparked by the mistreatment of Eveline and the deception of Mia, leading to a tragic outcome for the Baker Family. The irony of the situation is that Eveline could have actually had a family who loved her, but because she wanted Mia specifically as her family, she destroyed the Bakers and, with them, any real chance at happiness for herself.

In RE 8, we learn how Eveline was created originally as a vessel for Miranda's dead child Eva. When it turns out Eveline isn't good enough for her, Miranda seeks to steal away Rose for the same purpose. The tragedy is expanded through the Lords, who Miranda treats as her "children," from the sycophantic Moreau, to the lonely Bienviento, to the rebellious Heisenburg. Even Dimitrescu is essentially following in the footsteps of her "Mother Miranda," kidnapping people to create new children for herself. I am left to wonder sometimes if Eveline isn't actually the remains of Eva, fully aware of the monster her mother truly was and desperately seeking a family far better than her own. That idea drifts pretty far into MatPat territory, so I doubt it.

Ethan exists in stark contrast to Miranda, even though his goal is the same as hers in the most basic sense. He's eager to be present in Rose's life, but he doesn't want to control it. His sacrifice is an acceptance of something Miranda could never understand: our children are not our property. They are people, and we have a responsibility to them. Eva was treated as an end goal, something Miranda sought to possess. Eveline was literally made into a weapon, her humanity and childhood only seen as a shield by her abusers.

Rose was seen and treated as a human being by her family. Her mom, her dad, and her godfather of sorts Chris all did the best they could for her, but the world mistreated her for being different. She suffered mistreatment and abuse, one of the dollhouse scenes clearly evoking the struggles of "Carrie" from the classic Stephen King story. However, despite her fears to the contrary, Rose had people who loved her and who anchored her. Her power was potentially just as terrifying as Carrie's, but she had people who truly cared. She didn't need to burn down the village to feel the warmth. That didn't negate the pain she felt, but it gave her the chance to eventually examine her potential, and choose her own path.

Her journey through the collective memory of the megamycete allowed her to finally come to terms with everything, as well as to put the origin of all this generational trauma to rest once and for all. Shadows of Rose is a triumphant ending to Resident Evil's best story, and I can't recommend it enough.

[seraphdesire]

For RE

💛 and 🖤?

Ty for the ask!!! :> I'll answer for both re7 and re8!!

💛: What is a popular ship you just can't get behind, and why?

In general I can't get behind Ethan x Heisenberg or Ethan x Chris. Heisenberg openly said he wants to use Rose as a weapon to destroy Miranda. Considering Ethan's main objective in re8 is to save his daughter and he has that whole cutscene with Heisen where he rejects the offer and they argue as well - it just seems... way too forced. I don't think Ethan would want to even be around someone who thinks so lowly of Rose, let alone in an intimate capacity.

For Ethan x Chris, I don't like or understand the ship when looking at their canon relationship. One of the very first cutscenes in the Winters' house is Chris and his team quite literally breaking in and nonstop shooting Mia, right in front of his eyes. Chris then shoving the table out of the way and shooting Mia right in the face one last time before kidnapping Rose? Yeah. That would do a number on anyone. Ethan thought he could trust Chris, only to witness that.

^ not to mention everything that happened in Moreau boss fight area (that fishing village) and just before Ethan fights Heisen to the death. Chris is actively withholding very crucial information from him regarding his family and Mother Miranda, info that he really should've told him about (even one of the other soldiers in Chris's team told him so and he agreed).

I don't know much about re7 as I only played like 2 hours of it and avoid interacting with things to do with it so I'm not sure about ships. I can imagine people would ship Ethan and Jack though, knowing the fandom, and that wouldn't work for obvious reasons... I think Chris might be in a short cutscene in biohazard too, so same thing applies really :) also Zoe x Ethan might be a ship too? I'm not very familiar with the re7 side of the fandom but it seems plausible, especially thinking about the ending where you can choose to save Zoe (family member to the cannibals that tried to eat him and kill him and his wife) and Mia (his wife that he literally went there to rescue in the first place).

🖤: Which character is not as morally good as everyone seems to think?

Oh boy... hmm, for re7, everyone's intentions and characters are pretty clear imo... the Baker family do nothing to hide the fact that they are cannibalistic murderers and the only good people in the game are actually good people. Perhaps Zoe? I don't know her character too well but she seems suspicious to me. Particularly with how it all ends if you do decide to save Zoe instead of Mia at the end.

For re8, that's also a tough one. I want to say Chris again. As I mentioned before he really should've told Ethan about everything. I get leaving him behind when they were about to explode the island, as Ethan stole the detonator off him and would've died regardless of if he was on the island or not (the megamycete being destroyed would've killed him as the mould is the only thing keeping him "alive" anyway).

Chris also just sorta? Killed Mia in front of him?? While it wasn't actually Mia, he still thought it was and fully believed that until towards the end of re8. And Chris kidnapped Rose too. Without telling him why. Not to mention, Chris still refused to let Ethan be a part of it - even though he'd already killed three of four lords by that point and snuck off to kill the fourth (Heisen).

Even towards the end Chris wasn't exactly a "moral" person. I get that he was in a difficult situation though and had a lot of hard choices to make. Ethan and Chris weren't friends, more acquaintances, which is something I think people don't really understand. There's care there, yes, but not too much of it is displayed. Like when Chris is telling Mia that her husband is dead and Rose is still in Miranda's clutches when he finds her in that cell underground, and when they're in the chopper and she's demanding to know where Ethan is and Chris just slams his fist on the side of the chopper and very bluntly tells her that Ethan is dead and won't be coming back. He's not as sunshine and rainbows as everyone wants to think. I know he's just doing his job but he's not as moralistic as people make him out to be. Yes he's a protagonist, a "hero" even, but I don't think his plot armour is thick enough to protect him in this case.

[rallamajoop]

Twist my arm, why don’t you? XD Well, I did tell you guys to ask!

What the hell, let’s open this one by sharing a few pics from a Sims household created by a good friend of mine, made up of Heisenberg (mad scientist), Mia (secret agent) and Ethan (just really wants to be a dad). The three of them immediately became the most delightful sims-land trainwreck imaginable.

Their neighbourhood is full of werewolves, because you can do that in the Sims. Ethan’s apparently made friends with some of them. But because this is Sims-land, when he and Mia tried to have a romantic dinner together, it ended with Ethan passed out on the kitchen floor while Mia set herself on fire, with Heisenberg running in in his underwear with some passing hippie, and being no help whatsoever. Aren’t Sims wonderful?

Beyond the land of the Sims, though… I mean, let’s be honest, my desire for mithanberg comes from how I ship both Ethan/Heisenberg and Ethan/Mia, and refuse to choose between them. I could see it working either as a proper OT3, or a poly arrangement where Ethan’s involved with both of them, but Mia and Heisenberg aren’t involved with each other (on which note, I also ship the hell out of Mia/Zoe, so Mia is not missing out here).

For the few really mithanberg-ish things I’ve ever posted so far, Follow Me Home is headed for the former category, whereas that other one is more likely headed for the latter. Going for the proper-OT3 option does come with the extra hurdle of trying to figure out how Mia/Heisenberg would work when they’ve never even met in canon, but I am fully up for the challenge.

But there’s way more to this ship for me than just the convenience of ‘why not both’. Seriously, wintersberg fic is missing out on so much by writing Mia off so quickly.

For one, Ethan’s somewhat-complicated relationship with Mia is the best evidence you could ask for that Ethan might actually be up for getting involved with someone as fucked up as Heisenberg (or even Chris, if you’re more into winterfield). Mia has canonically lied to Ethan, (accidentally) drawn him into mortal danger, and (while possessed) sliced off his hand with a chainsaw. Ethan’s still with her in RE8, so clearly he’s willing to forgive.

Fig 1: Apparently not a dealbreaker!

Heisenberg, meanwhile, opens their relationship by stabbing Ethan with a fucking spear-headed fencepost, chains him up, drags him off be put on trial, and ‘rescues’ him only by throwing him into a gauntlet of lycans and spike traps. He later sends Ethan through the second gauntlet that is the Stronghold, before finally trying to make a deal with him. When Ethan refuses, Heisenberg throws him to a chainsaw-propeller-faced monstrosity made of engine parts sewed onto a corpse.

Fig 2: Also not a dealbreaker?

I will make some excuses for Heisenberg, given that he’s been trapped in a repressive cult for decades and seems to have internalised a lot of bullshit about the strong destroying the weak, but holy shit is this guy red flag city (and I love it). And that’s not even touching on all the violent bullshit Chris pulls in this game. You may also note that neither Heisenberg or Chris have Mia’s convenient mind-control or replaced-by-a-shapeshifter excuse for their worst behaviour.

Ethan asks for none of the madness all these maniacs have injected into his life, but goddamn, does he learn to roll with it and come back swinging. Whether or not you assume Ethan ever found out the truth about Mia’s past, she offers us some solid proof that Ethan’s ‘type’ does not exclude covert special agents with a talent for violence, who’ve spent years working full-time for evil bioweapons manufacturers. Ethan may not be ready to admit to himself that he’s got a thing for dangerous people, and Mia may be a lot better at pretending to be normal than Heisenberg, but the fact Ethan’s still with her could say a lot.

Basically, if you wanna ship Ethan with either of these other guys, Mia Winters is the best ally you could ask for!

There are other problems with writing off Mia too quickly so you can ship Ethan with someone else, one being that it makes Ethan look like, well, kind of a psychopath. Fic after fic presents him as the kind of guy who can witness the mother of his child being brutally murdered in front of him, and within a matter of hours, he’s apparently realised he was never that happy with her anyway, so it’s just fine if he’s fucking some other dude. The fact the ‘Mia’ people are so quick to dismiss as an abusive bitch wasn’t even the real Mia apparently doesn’t necessitate any sort or reexamination. It’s basically a meme at this point.

Thing is, even if his relationship with the real Mia was unhealthy, you just aren’t going to make a guy like Ethan process that within hours of watching her fucking assassination. Try and make him face it, and you’ll push him straight into defensiveness. Even at the best of times, Ethan’s just not the kind of guy who could leave the mother of his child without a fuckload of heartache and a few rounds of ‘what does this say about me’ at the very least (and Mia loves Ethan far too much to leave him, except in a misguided attempt to protect him). Even if you're writing an AU where Mia really does die (rather than just suffering the usual round of character assassination), at least let that poor boy ANGST about it! C’mon, people – that’s the juicy stuff!

Of course, the real problem fans are grappling with here is that in the current fandom climate, the idea that Ethan would willingly hook up with a guy who stabbed him in the gut that morning is still somehow more palatable than having to consider that Ethan might be capable of being (gasp!) less than completely faithful to a partner who doesn’t deserve it. So it’s not enough that he thinks Mia’s dead, she’s also got to be a horrible person and a complete non-entity who can be forgotten as quickly as we’ve brought her up, just to get her out of the way – as if that somehow makes Ethan look better.

People are so eager to get rid of Mia that I have legit read multiple different fics where, even after being mysteriously reborn post-game via horrific mould-magic, somehow one of the very first things Ethan wants to talk about afterwards is divorcing his wife. Can we not even give the poor guy a single scene to have a proper existential crisis over not being human anymore before finding a woman to blame for all his problems?

Fig 3: Ethan's actual thoughts on his wife right before his death

On the greater subject of that whole inconvenient marriage poor Ethan's saddled with, I can only say ‒ again ‒ c’mon, people, that’s the juicy stuff! A good story needs conflict, and Ethan having had this weird hook-up with/confusing attraction to an incredibly creepy guy in the middle of an incredibly confusing day and while he thought his wife was dead, only to later discover that she’s alive? GOLD.

You don’t even necessarily have to wrap it all back around to a happy OT3 scenario. An Ethan who's struggling with Mia’s (actual) death, or even the realisation that he truly can’t deal with all her lies, all while telling himself Heisenberg’s just a rebound fling that doesn’t mean anything – that’s all the angst and pathos and opportunities for filthy smut you could ever ask for! Lean into it! Heck, the Duke tells Ethan outright that he can’t go back to his old life anymore – you could have Ethan decide his own status as a mould-creature makes him too dangerous to go back to Mia and Rose. More angst, more drama, more actual material for narrative conflict!

tl;dr: Write Mia off in a sentence, and not only have you made Ethan look like an asshole, you’ve made your story boring. And thus (thank you for bearing with me) ends my tangent about The State of Wintersberg Fandom, and why Mia deserves more love (from Ethan at least, even if the author can't completely bring themselves to join in).

Getting back to the real topic here: if you are up for letting your resolution involve an OT3 scenario, you’ve got some great options to play with.

Mia bossing the other two around is certainly an angle you could go for, but I think I’d prefer watching Mia and Heisenberg working together to drive Ethan out of his mind (not that options like these are ever mutually exclusive, mind!) But I’m broadly more interested in how you get these three together than what it would look like once they get there. In other words, it’s time to talk Mia and Heisenberg.

As I touched on above, these two do have more in common than it might look at a glance. They’ve both been infected by the mould, they’ve both spent years (or even decades) trapped in dysfunctional, cult-like, mould-controlled families, and had to bottle themselves up and hide behind a persona while working for truly terrible people. They’ve both done some truly terrible stuff themselves, probably watched even worse happen to other innocent people, and presumably internalised some pretty awful excuses for themselves along the way. They’re also both madly in love with Ethan (what, is anyone into wintersberg going to argue with me on that one?) In short, there is no lack of stuff for these two to bond over and find common ground.

I can’t see Mia being too hard to convince if Ethan does want to try an open relationship either. Heck, the first thing we ever see from Mia involves sending Ethan a message where she tries to let him go, because she doesn’t think she’s making it back alive. Her guilt throughout RE7 is palpable, and how much she loves Ethan is the same. I don’t think it’s any stretch to say Mia would be willing to contemplate almost anything if it would make Ethan happy (and frankly, she’s pulled enough shit herself in this relationship that she doesn’t get to get judgy anyhow).

That said, I do think she’d have reasonable concerns about Ethan’s new boyfriend being someone like Heisenberg, but then, he’s hardly any more dangerous than what Mia’s brought to the table herself. If anything, your bigger obstacle would be convincing Ethan that he’s sure enough about whatever’s going on with Heisenberg to admit it at all. But then, I don’t think getting Mia and Heisenberg involved with each other too would be too difficult either.

It doesn’t hurt that Mia has a lot of the same characteristics that probably draw Heisenberg to Ethan: a badass survivor, tough and determined enough to be a little sassy even in the face of danger, but still very vulnerably human underneath. That vulnerable side of Mia is a very important part of her to me – it’s the main aspect in play in the longest thing I’ve (yet) posted with any Mia/Heisenberg interaction, where she’s locked up in Miranda’s lab, and has no good reason to trust him. There’s nothing openly shippy going on in that story, though Heisenberg makes no bones about what he wants with her husband. I’m not sure exactly where things are headed in that universe, but you know there’s drama coming on in that front.

The main point there is that Mia’s not too badass to be intimated by Heisenberg, especially when she’s got her back up against the wall. Take them out of the village, though, and I can see Mia being a much tougher nut to crack.

Which is mostly my way of leading into mentioning that the longest thing I’ve written between them that I haven’t posted yet basically flips the previous scenario: instead of Heisenberg coming to tell Mia he’s after her husband, now it’s Mia coming to tell him she knows what he’s after, and he's about to receive some serious grilling about his intentions. What I realised in writing it was that somewhere in the middle of this conversation, Heisenberg goes from seeing Mia as an obstacle between him and Ethan to seeing her as a potential bonus. He’s impressed with her gall and starting to look at her in a whole new light. This is one ficbit that's definitely going places ‒ only problem being the usual one: I’ve still got to write the rest of the damn fic to get to that scene. (I’m working on it! But you know how it goes.)

That isn’t the only way I can see you getting the three of them together, of course. One interesting alternate possibility might be to suggest that Mia and Heisenberg have met before. Mia seems to have met Miranda (they’ve been photographed together, at least), and it’s not completely beyond the realms of possibility that Miranda might have brought along an ‘assistant’ (slash-bodyguard-slash-whatever else she thinks he’s useful for). And if she’s going to bring any of her ‘children’, Heisenberg is by far the best qualified to pass as normal, hilarious as that should be.

I don’t imagine either Heisenberg of Mia would be eager to admit any of their personal reservations about their respective ‘bosses’ to each other, meeting under circumstances like that. But the possibilities are intriguing nonetheless.

For complete AU territory, however, I don’t think you could find a better start point for an Ethan/Mia/Heisenberg scenario than to introduce Heisenberg as Mia’s ex. He’d be back in her life for Reasons, and Ethan would naturally be more than a little threatened by this huge, hot guy with history with his wife, little realising that Heisenberg’s as interested in Ethan as he is in rekindling anything with her.

Or for doing the whole thing on easy-mode, suppose Mia and Ethan have always been in an open relationship from the start – or that they’ve already had that conversation because Mia’s also in love with Zoe (I meant it when I said I ship them too!) Doesn’t mean there’s no angst or drama potential for Ethan getting involved with Heisenberg: he’s still going to be questioning what’s wrong with him that this guy is turning his crank, or whether it’s remotely appropriate for him to be seeing someone new while he’s got a six-month-old daughter at home. But if nothing else, I can promise you that having a third person around to babysit while Ethan’s ‘busy’ could only do good things for his sex life at this point. ;D

So, yeah – those would be My Thoughts On Mithanberg in a nutshell (or possibly more of a nut bowl, I can never resist the urge turn out a full essay on this stuff). If you’ve got any interest in writing mithanberg yourself, please do consider all these ideas free to a good home! Treating Mia better makes Ethan/Heisenberg better for me, and all those possibilities are right there to explore.

But to finish, have some more random Sims!

There are many more of these if anyone wants to see them, though most are less G-rated ‒ the friend running this household has installed ALL of the porn mods to enhance this little trainwreck.

(Also, before I'm done, just throwing a quick tag at @macgyvertape, since I had to screenshot their ask rather than reply 'officially' so I could reply to the both of them at once.)

[residenteviltimeline]

July 19, 2017: Once freed, Zoe is able to make two doses of the serum, and the three attempt to escape into the swamps via boat. However, they are attacked by Jack Baker, who has become a large Mold monster. During the fight, Zoe reveals that the only way to kill him would be to inject him with the serum. Ethan is able to do so, but this leaves them with only one dose of the serum, which Ethan gives to Mia. The two attempt to escape, and Ethan promises to send help for Zoe. As Ethan and Mia pass by the wreckage of the Annabelle as they attempt to escape, their boat is sent flying by Eveline, whose Mold colony has extended all the way out into the swamp. Ethan, unconscious, is taken prisoner by Eveline. As Mia attempts to find him, Eveline follows her around the ship in hallucination form, eventually forcing her to re-live the events leading up to the ship’s crash when she fails to remember on her own. She then reveals a videotape in which Mia reminds herself that she is Eveline’s caretaker, and her “mother,” despite the circumstances. Eveline asks Mia to be her mother again, but this time with Ethan at her side, so they can be like a real family. Mia, enraged by all that has happened, emphatically tells Eveline that they were never family, and never will be. Rejected, Eveline says she doesn’t need Mia any more, and leaves her alone to find Ethan. When she does, she attempts to make Mia kill him using her Mold infection, but she is able to resist thanks to the serum. She gives Ethan tissue samples from Eveline that he can use to make a special toxin to kill her, and allows herself to be consumed by the Mold colony as Ethan escapes. He follows a path from the Annabelle to the mines nearby, in the process hearing via radio that some kind of armed team has arrived on site, and are searching for Lucas Baker. He manages to find Lucas’ lab established by The Connections, where he makes the toxin to kill Eveline. Having learned that Eveline is actually the old woman from the Baker home, he attempts to get back and use the toxin on her, but is bombarded by hallucinations and Mold zombies. Despite this, he is able to reach the house, finding the actual Eveline and managing to inject her with the toxin, despite her attempts to stop him. As she dies, however, her body merges with the Mold colony beneath the house, and she becomes a ginormous monster, knocking Ethan out of a window as he was making his way out of the house. He manages to survive until a Blue Umbrella helicopter descends onto the scene, and they are able to deal enough damage that Eveline's Mold colony begins to die, becoming calcium crystal and dissolving. With Eveline finally destroyed, the helicopter lands, and Chris Redfield disembarks, helping Ethan board the chopper, where he finds they have already rescued Mia. Before they leave, Ethan asks Chris to find and rescue Zoe Baker. 

[saintsofwarding]

WE SHALL BE MONSTERS

Header by @keltii-tea

Chapter 28: Epilogue

"Hey. Boss."

Chris Redfield looked up, his mug of green tea half-raised to his mouth. Tundra- Emily- stood in his office doorway, her forearm braced against the frame. Her dark eyes flicked up and down, taking in Chris's hunched position over the desk, his tea, the thin laptop he'd been staring at with brow furrowed, the stacks of papers heaped all over the desk, and the shelves, and the floor.

"Am I interrupting something?" she said, after a beat.

"Someone's always interrupting something," Chris said.

"Something important, though?"

Chris's mouth quirked in a smile. "What have you got for me?"

"All business, Chris." She stepped into his office and immediately crossed to the window to pull open the blinds. Chris squinted in the wash of gray sunlight, weak and rain-filled though it was. "Jesus, boss, this plant is barely clinging to life."

She'd turned toward the struggling money tree set atop an overflowing filing cabinet in the corner of the room, giving its dry leaves a flick.

Chris groaned, finally tearing his eyes away from the laptop in front of him. "Take it if you want. There's not really room for it in here."

"Nor water?"

"No water. Only caffeinated beverages and protein shakes."

"You need a life."

"Find me the time, and I'll get one. Come on." He beckoned to her. "Show me what you brought."

Emily kicked the door shut with her boot heel, cutting the sounds of the BSAA European HQ down to a murmur. The huge glass-and-steel edifice was uncomfortably modern, and made Chris feel like he was in some kind of biohazard research facility, or, God forbid, an Umbrella lab. But he'd got used to it, like he'd got used to a lot of things. He had to.

The work wasn't over yet.

Six months had passed since the events of the village. The second events, specifically, and one had to be specific when dealing with the BSAA bureaucracy. Chris longed to get back out in the field, dispense with this endless paperwork, but it was necessary for this latest project, this latest mission. Its parameters were simple:

Locate Rosemary Winters, the second host of the Romanian megamycete.

Easier said than done. Once the dust settled and the sphere of impenetrable mold-roots Rose had summoned around herself and the other Lords collapsed, it was empty.

Not surprising. She had found her family. She probably wanted more than anything to be alone with them. Time would tell whether that was a good thing- or an apocalyptically terrible one. Still, Chris reasoned, she'd been able to keep Heisenberg in check, albeit by a thread. As for the others...well. At least she wasn't Miranda.

The BSAA was there within a few hours, called in by Hound Wolf Squad to evacuate the townsfolk from the neighboring valley. They swept the area, the destroyed village, the great pit his bomb had blasted into the landscape. Chris hadn't seen Mia Winters amongst the Lords. Most likely she was dead, murdered by Heisenberg or one of the others in retaliation for her crimes against them. Or, knowing them, just for fun.

That was probably the tidiest solution, but Chris sure as hell hoped it wasn't how it had gone down with her. Mia had done terrible things over the course of her involvement with bioterrorism, and not to mention withholding Ethan's death and resurrection from him, but she'd still been his friend. They'd shared experiences. They'd shared grief. And in the end, all she'd wanted was to get Ethan back and maybe-

Maybe-

Begin to make things right.

And had she? Chris commandeered Hound Wolf Squad as BSAA choppers circled overhead, had searched the village ruins and delved down into the pit, lycan activity at a low thanks to the oncoming day. Ethan's remains would be down there, if they were anywhere, and he searched the crater all day, through the evening, past moonrise, into the beginnings of another night.

Nothing was there.

If Ethan's body had somehow survived the blast, if it had somehow lingered in some extant form, it- and he- was now long gone.

***

Emily tugged a chair over and sank into it, leafing through the thick file in her hands. It was bursting at the seams with documents, smaller folders, photographs and faxes and print-outs. All the compiled evidence from their operatives also on the mission, as well as documents sent from other, smaller BSAA hubs.

"Where shall I start..." Emily's red brows shot skyward. "Aha. Here's a good one. Okay, get this. In the underground alternative and industrial music scene of Berlin, Germany, a woman reports having seen a band play with- and I quote- 'supernatural skill and mesmerizing sexuality'. She goes on to describe the lead singer, bassist, and drummer: a very tall woman, a young blonde, and a man covered in scars who reportedly made the entire sound system levitate, much to the delight of the audience. And here's the kicker: this band's name? Black God Death Cult."

"False lead."

"Huh? Really?"

"Claire's seen them. Multiple times. They're clear."

"Oh. Uh, okay, then, still on the subject of music-" She ruffled some papers. "How about this. A black metal band in Iceland called Gear Torture whose aesthetic revolves around rust, decay, horror imagery-"

"Nah."

"What about Iron Stallion Sixty-"

"Em, I don't think the Four Lords are going undercover as a metal band," Chris interrupted.

"Iron Stallion Sixty-Nine isn't metal, Chris," Tundra said dryly.

"Please move on."

"You sure you don't want to hear about-" Her voice dropped into crime-show-announcer tones. "-the Monster Catfish of Lake Baikal, Captured on Video? Could be the fish-man. There's a YouTube link."

"No."

"Right. So here's an interesting one. An entire convent of nuns in Samokov, Bulgaria described to one of our operatives their strange and entrancing visions of dead relatives that plagued them for hours before dissipating. Their water supply tested clear, as did their food, but a peculiar organic particulate lingering in the air raised questions with the investigation team whether young Lady Beneviento had come to call."

"A convent of nuns."

"That's what this says."

"Had a bunch of visions."

"Correct."

Chris leaned back in his too-small chair, rubbing his hand down his face. God, he was tired, and the green tea wasn't doing shit to change that. Maybe he should swap back to coffee. Maybe he should go have a cigarette. "Maybe they should call an exorcist."

"Boss, are you taking this seriously?"

"Yeah, yeah. Sorry, Em." He let out his breath and straightened up, reaching for his now-lukewarm tea. "Keep going."

She watched him through her lowered lashes, fox-like eyes sharp as ever. "Do you even want to find her?" she asked, quietly.

Chris met her gaze. The silence between them lingered. He could hear the rain beating against the window, the traffic twenty stories below, the hum of the building around them, the conversation in the hall that grew louder and faded as it passed his door. This place, this world. All the people in it, alive and breathing because so many like Emily and the rest of Hound Wolf Squad- like him- like Piers, and Ethan, and all the others who had given their lives- had sacrificed so much to keep the monsters back. To keep them from the door. To decide, sometimes in extremis, where the line must be drawn. How far he had to go to keep the darkness at bay.

And six months ago, whether he liked it or not, he'd crossed that line. Rose had become...he didn't know what. A new Miranda? He hoped not. A new host for the megamycete was his official take, but he knew it was more than that. The megamycete...the Black God...was more than that. Archival memory, spanning thousands of years. Power he could scarcely fathom. Power that organizations like Umbrella, like the Connections, like Ouroboros, for all their dreams of conquest and grandeur, could only scratch the surface of.

Sparrows, thinking because they felt the sunlight on their wings, they knew the true heat of the sun.

Rosemary had made her decision. She had stood with the other mutants, open to his fire. He should have taken her down. He could have. Cult leader or not, she was flesh and blood. But he hadn't. He'd lowered his rifle.

He'd let her go.

And even now, he couldn't be sorry about that. He thought of Heisenberg, of all people, and what must have transpired in the days after the village's original destruction to make him into what he had become. A far cry from the great Lord who'd served Miranda, that was for damn sure. When you can't bend, you break. And he couldn't deny Heisenberg and Rose were survivors.

And, maybe, though it chafed to admit it, though it went against everything he'd fought for all these years-

They were people, too.

Time would tell if they became decent ones.

So he looked at Emily and shrugged. "'Course I do," he told her. "Any more cryptids in that file of yours?"

"Nah. That's it for now. I'll come back when there's more."

"I'll take a look. Make sure Black God Death Cult isn't a front for Karl Heisenberg's newest cyborg army scheme after all."

"Sure thing, boss." She tossed the file onto his desk. It landed with a weighty smack. "Hey. Come to dinner this Friday? My wife's making that one stir fry thing you like."

"If I can get out-"

"Come on, Chris."

He smiled again. "Okay, Em. See you later."

She left with the money tree. The door clicked shut. Chris stared at the file for a couple seconds, then reached out for it.

Something was sticking from the papers within- a corner of stiff cardstock. Chris frowned and tugged it forth. A postcard. A little dented, a little battered. The front showed a generic seaside scene. The back-

He read it once, twice, without comprehension. Then it struck him. A rush of cold and hot, crackling through his nerves. He didn't move from his place at the desk, his fingers locked around the postcard with its single message, written in bubbly letters.

Wish you were here.

His head jerked up as the door to his office opened again and Emily stuck her head through. "Sorry, boss," she said, a little breathless. "You got a visitor."

"...Who is it?"

"You'd...you'd better come and see."

The tension radiating from the waiting room was thick in the air, even before Chris and Emily strode in, Em snapping effortlessly into Tundra-mode, her hand resting lightly on her holstered sidearm. They made it down the stairs and into the waiting room, as modern as the rest of the building, its glass exterior wall cutting out in sharp silhouette the half-dozen plainclothes operatives with pistols pointed at the solitary figure between them. The receptionist had her hand on a panic button; relief filled her eyes when Chris and Emily entered the room and stopped outside the circle of BSAA ops.

"What's going on here?" Chris said.

"Sir." One of the operatives nodded at the stranger, who wore a hooded jacket, a large, heavy-looking duffel bag open and on the floor at their feet. Their hands were raised, their head down. "She just came in. Asked to see you. Then showed what was in the bag."

Chris kept his eyes on the stranger. He couldn't see her face- just a glimpse of chin and a couple strands of gray-brown hair. His hands lifted, palms out, he stepped past the gun barrels. The stranger didn't move as he bent, as he moved aside the open zipper of the bag.

The light gleamed off milky crystal. A collection of broken limbs. And a familiar face.

A smile touched Chris's mouth.

"Thought you were dead, Mia," he said.

Mia Winters pulled back her hood. She looked about as tired as he felt, dark circles stamped under her eyes, her brows furrowed together. But he saw hope in her gaze, and in her voice when she spoke, vivid and undeniable.

"Not yet," she said. "And...I'm hoping...that's two of us." She glanced around at the other operatives, then back to Chris. "I heard you have access to something miraculous. You call it the MARS, right? A mold recombination system?"

She paused, and there was something brittle in the silence, a yearning so strong it seemed to shimmer from her, from every tense movement. Her lips fluttered; she licked them, then took a short breath to speak again.

"A means of resurrection?" she asked.

Chris should have ordered her immediate arrest. Should have ordered Ethan's remains whisked away, stored in containment somewhere until a thousand and a half tests could be run on the calcified biomatter.

Could have, should have, would have.

This time, for the first time in nearly sixteen years, his full smile felt real.

"I think," he told Mia, holding out his hand for hers, "we can talk."

***

Sunlight, fading.

A brush of warmth on her skin, just as fast stolen by the wind.

Another day, ending.

"Eyes on the road, kid."

"I know." Rose opened her eyes, focusing again on the long, curving single-track road ahead of the range rover wheels. The vehicle had once been painted green; now it was more rust than paint, the entire body rattling ominously each time she accelerated, but Heisenberg had souped up the engine to breathtaking levels. Now, it ran like a luxury automobile, albeit with more glowing exhaust ports and clouds of black smoke than most.

Rippling fields of grass spread to either side, golden in the fading, liquid light of afternoon. Cloud-shadows moved over the expanse of moorland like great beasts just beneath the surface of still water, the land itself flowing like the sea until it broke off, suddenly, and plunged to the waves themselves, the world ending in favor of the water.

Here and there, patches of purple heather or jutting rock formations broke the expanse of green-gray and blue-green and peat-brown, but the splendor of this place was in the sky, unbroken by tree or building or mountain, echoing on and on forever.

Rose had never visited the Highlands during her and Heisenberg's brief stint in Glasgow; neither had he, and, glancing sideways at him in the passenger seat, Rose could see the way he drank it in with his eyes, even behind his round shades. Every new place must still seem like a wonder to him; two decades wasn't so long to be out, not in comparison to the long life he'd led before. He did a pretty good job covering up his true feelings with brash remarks and cocky bravado, but in the end, he did have a heart.

Rose knew. She'd literally seen it.

He wasn't driving. He was forbidden to after they'd been pulled over eight times in England and southern Scotland for driving all over the center line and yelling threats at the other drivers that included suggestions he'd remove their limbs and sew them on backwards, a feat which, Rose also knew, Heisenberg was fully capable of. They'd had a drawn-out argument which ended in Rose stealing his glasses and hiding them until he one- bought her a coffee and two- gave her sole driving privileges. Though, Rose reasoned, if he really, really wanted to, nothing was stopping him from taking control of the entire metal body of the car and doing something, uh, uncool.

Now, silence had fallen, save for the sound of the tires on the road, the low, hazy music on the radio, and the wind whistling through the cracked window. A new place. Each hill, each dip in the land, each ancient stone tower standing sentinel against the sky, each meter of road racing beneath them, each was new.

They were out.

They were free.

All of them. Even Moreau. They had retreated from the carnage of the village after Rose's dramatic little declaration to Chris, and Moreau had insisted, with his newfound confidence, the Lords go and check on his followers down by the reservoir.

They were there, all right, the group of robed cultists shivering in the frigid dawn, bare feet blue in the snow. They were used to castle life, after all. But Moppet bounded toward him with a squeal of delight and threw herself into Moreau's arms, raining kisses down on his face and slimy lips while Moreau held her.

"Your holy relic saved us, Lord Moreau!" Moppet said, between kisses. "The phial you gave me so long ago? It spared all of us from the wolves!"

"Thank goodness," Moreau mumbled. "Thank goodness. If...if I had lost you...if I had lost you for good..."

His eyes were squeezed shut, the contentment on his face undeniable. Rose thought of the glimpse she'd seen of him before, the earnest love on his face as he'd spoken to Miranda and Eva. The face might look a little different, but the love was the same. Better, now. Moppet looked at him exactly the same way.

At last, Moppet stood back, flushed and giggling, and Moreau faced Rose and the Lords once more.

"Come with us," Rose urged. "Your followers, too. You're always a part of this family."

Moreau gave her a look of gentle melancholy. "No, Rosemary," he told her. "I...I will never...never be...welcome out there. Beyond. Once, maybe, I..." He paused for a moment, staring hard into the distance. "A long, long time ago, maybe, I would have...wanted. But now...no more. No longer. I have found something...something...better."

He glanced at Moppet. "And where...I belong."

"Okay," Rose said. She swooped forward and gave him a little peck on the cheek. "You know best."

He touched his cheek, then bobbed his head up and down in a firm nod. "I will see you..." he said, then seemed to ponder. "Again," he decided. "Perhaps."

"Good luck, Salvatore," Rose told him. "All of you."

"See ya, fishstick," Heisenberg said gruffly, elbowing Moreau in the side. "Take care of the dame, now, won't you?"

"Forever," Moreau said, taking Moppet's hand, holding it tight between his own.

And, later, Rose stood by as Moreau led his people to a cleft in a rocky cliff, a cave mouth leading down and down into darkness. One by one, they stepped through, Moppet holding aloft a lantern, her back laden with a pack full of supplies, each of the other cultists now outfitted for the journey- to where, Rose had no idea. A better place, perhaps, than Moreau had ever known. A kinder one. A crystal city, far beneath the earth.

A paradise, where they would be safe forever.

It wasn't her place to know. She simply watched as Moreau's followers vanished into the darkness, as Moppet's lantern bobbed, a ball of light, then a point, then a pinprick, then gone altogether.

Dimitrescu, too. Once Moreau and his followers set out, the rest of them, bruised and exhausted and starving, had trooped up to the castle to huddle in the dark, dank, dusty rooms and rest as best they could. The first floor, and the entry wing to the castle, was still crusted with Moreau's slime- pretty wrecked- not to mention the ominous pool of dried gore that covered the cracked floor of the main hall.

Dimitrescu merely smiled at this.

"My dinner," she said, "disagreed with me." and extended a single nail to pick at some invisible scrap between her clean white teeth.

Past the first floor, however, Rose couldn't help but gasp at the splendor. Glossy white walls covered with ornamental gilt, sconces molded in the shapes of flowers, gleaming mahogany and priceless artworks. The layer of dust and grime over it all couldn't disguise that this place totally freaking ruled. Rose decided to not ask to have a look at the basement. Preserve the illusion, and all that.

Dimitrescu vanished somewhere in the maze of corridors, leaving Rose, Donna, Angie, and Heisenberg to pass out on one of the gargantuan four-posters in one of the castle's many bedrooms, to hide from the sound of helicopters outside, to stuff down as much preserved meat and tinned goods and priceless wine as they could scavenge from the kitchens.

Eventually, days later, Dimitrescu re-emerged. Rose had looked up from her book, from which she'd been reading a story to Donna and Angie. Her eyes got big. If Lady Dimitrescu had been intimidating before, fixed up and dressed to the nines she was nothing short of breathtaking. Swathed in shimmering silver silk jersey, in smoke-gray furs soft as snowfall, rope of pearls at her throat, black hat perched on her fresh, gleaming curls, she set a long cigarette holder to her crimson lips and exhaled blue into the gloom.

"Fuck, Alci," Heisenberg said, as a wave of expensive amber-musk perfume rolled across them. "Something die in here?"

"Shut up, you disgusting little rat," she snapped, and took another drag on her cigarette. She seemed to gather herself, then turned with a smile to face Rose.

"Child," she said. "I wish to offer my most...sincere thanks for your involvement in the reclamation of my castle. And I wish to convey how deeply sorry I am that I must, now, say farewell."

"What?" Rose closed her book. "You're leaving, too?"

Heisenberg let out a bark of triumphant laughter.

"Indeed," Dimitrescu said, with a glare toward him and a slight edge to her voice. "I know you and your...caretaker...will be wanting to travel together, and that simply will not do for me. Besides. The events here...our brother's regeneration...my own...and yours," she added, nodding to Donna. "All of it has made me consider...mmm...future paths I thought had been closed to me."

A distant look filled her eyes, her self-satisfied smirk fading. "Future paths I thought were long gone," she went on.

"Your daughters?" Rose asked.

Dimitrescu looked down on her again. "Indeed."

"They...they might not have regenerated, like you did," Rose said, tentatively. "They weren't Lords."

"No," Dimitrescu agreed. "But consider this, child. When your father slaughtered them, and sold them, and smiled at my misfortune, all hope was lost. And I was lost with it. All things, shattered. All loyalties, tested. Now, there is hope again. And though it may end in blood and tears for me...for them- for my darling girls- I will risk it."

She took up an oxblood traveling-case- stamped, Rose noticed, with the House Dimitrescu crest.

"I will return," she said, casting her gaze about the heights of the room, about the castle beyond. "Rest assured. But for now..."

A feral glint entered her eyes.

"...I must have words with the Duke."

***

Donna, meanwhile, was fast asleep in the back of the range rover, impervious to the bumps and jostles in the uneven road. Rose glanced at her in the rearview mirror. She'd shed her usual eyepatch, her hair down around her shoulders, and though she still tended toward gothy shades and heeled lace-up boots, she'd begun to branch out a little from mourning clothes.

Now, for the special occasion, she'd worn a long embroidered skirt, a brooch at her throat she said had belonged to her mother, and a gray woolen coat she'd made herself. Her arms were curled loosely around Angie, and at her side, tucked for safekeeping under the other seat belt, was an intricately-wrapped box tied with a ribbon.

"Heh. Honk the horn," Heisenberg said.

"Oh my god. You are evil."

He made a wild lunge for the horn. Rose cracked her elbow right into his face. Donna slept on. The moors rolled past, and eventually Rose and Heisenberg quieted down again, and the silence came in, and the wind, and they caught their first glimpse of the sea.

It came up fast- one moment the land seemed endless, and then it broke away, and the ocean spread before them. Vast; endless. Heisenberg leaned forward a little, tipping his glasses up on his head. He'd never seen the ocean before leaving the village with her. What an impossible wonder it must have seemed. What sheer emptiness. Rose wondered if that first sight had been exhilarating to him, or terrifying. She didn't ask. She didn't want to break the silence.

She didn't ask, either, about Mia.

She'd vanished from the chaos. She'd never turned up at the castle. Maybe the BSAA had taken her. And maybe- after what Heisenberg had told her during their several days hiding out in the castle- she'd had her eye on a different goal. Even now, thinking of her, a boil of vindictive heat twisted in Rose's guts. After all she'd done, she'd get away without incident? With Ethan's body? Still. Rose couldn't exactly hold her crimes against her, not for long. How could she, when she'd done what she did for the Four Lords?

They were out, now, free in the world. She'd given them all the means to do what they'd done under Miranda, to be monsters anew. And what monsters they'd once been. A village, destroyed. Decades of pain and suffering, nightmares inflicted on the innocent. Nightmares the scope of which she couldn't truly understand, could only witness through the dreams of the dead. And there was no accounting for that. No true forgiveness. Not unless the dead returned. And that wasn't possible, not for everyone.

But it could end. And now, maybe, it had. And that was all she had. She could only hope it would prove enough.

The road ended in a small car park, empty of other vehicles. Rose parked and killed the engine, dropping down to the dusty pavement. Donna stirred as Rose rapped on the window, then followed Heisenberg out past the pavement, wading through the golden, knee-high grass, all the way to the place where the world ended.

Seagulls mewed and tilted, tossed on the high breeze. The waves crashed at the cliff foot, great sprays of freezing spume and swells of deep, dark blue. The color of the ocean wasn't constant; it shifted, one moment a vivid glass-green, the next a deep, pensive gray, fading to mist out at the point where sky met sea.

Even in early August, the chill of the sea wind was sharp, biting through Rose's jean jacket and into her skin. She shivered. Heisenberg shifted closer, knocking his warm shoulder to hers.

"Happy birthday, kid," he told her.

"Don't mention it."

"Why this place?"

"Ah." She lifted an eyebrow. "You are looking at what will soon be the most beautiful sunset in Britain. According to this one article I read online, anyway. I thought...y'know. Not to get mushy, but I thought it'd be a good place to...begin. Again. Formally. You know, since it's my birthday, a big marker, kind of a nice symbolic breaking-off point-"

"Yeah, I get it."

"Okay, okay." She shut up, watching the waves. "Thanks."

"...Yeah?"

"Without you, I wouldn't be here to turn seventeen and stare at the stupid water."

He smirked. "And don't you forget it."

Rose snorted and rolled her eyes, then looked back at Donna by the range rover, struggling with the hamper.

"Guess we should help her or something," Heisenberg muttered.

"Could just stand here and watch her."

"Careful, kid. You're starting to sound like me."

The three of them together set up near the cliff's edge, spreading a blanket over the grass, weighing it down with jars of honey, cheese and bread, Romanian dishes with pronunciations Donna coached her through. A thermos of tea, full of rich spices that melted on the tongue. And, inside the intricate box, jewel-like pastries so delicately-made they could have only come from Donna's hands. Angie tore at one like a starving raccoon, while Rose marveled at the chocolate tarts and honey-and-walnut mucenici, savoring each bite. She opened presents- a handmade blouse, jacket, and trousers from Donna, embroidered with black and gold roses, and from Heisenberg-

"Since you lost your sword, and all," he said as she lifted the knife from the grease-stained paper grocery bag he'd crumpled around it in place of wrappings. Its blade flared deep-blue in the dying sunlight, and when Rose took its hilt, it fit her hand like she'd been born with it there. She ran her thumb over the thorny vines worked into the crossguard.

"I..." she started. She had to cough and start over. "...I didn't know you were capable of making anything this pretty."

"Shut up and say thank you."

The sun began to set. It sank toward the sea; it melted, and set the wind afire, painting a river of gold over the tops of the waves. The bite of the wind sharpened, and Rose and Heisenberg and Donna and Angie ended up huddled together, like they had been in the castle.

Rose rested her chin on the tops of her knees, staring out toward the horizon. Ouroboros was still out there. She'd take it down, it and so many monstrous things like it. The BSAA, too, and Chris, and her mother. But that was all for another day. For now, she could sit and watch the sunset, taste the wind, the scent of endings bitter on her tongue.

The end of another day.

The beginnings of a new one.

She shifted. Heisenberg looped his arm over her shoulders. She tipped her head sideways against his shoulder, her fingers loosely interlaced with Donna's.

"Drat," Donna said, softly.

"What is it?"

"I think I may have left the stove on in that...strange little house we stayed in."

"Broke in," Heisenberg said.

"Hm. Well..." Her expression became sly. "...I hope they don't mind."

Rose snorted. "You're the coolest aunt ever."

Donna turned bright red, hugging Angie. The doll gibbered at her, and Donna turned up her sleeve, made a small nick in the dead-white flesh of her inner arm, and allowed the tendrils of the Cadou within Angie's head latch onto the cut and feed on the blood. Rose watched, fascinated. Coolest aunt ever, indeed.

"Aha," Heisenberg said, suddenly. "Almost forgot." He reached inside his coat and pulled forth a folder, thin and sepia-stained and tied with twine, stamped with the Ouroboros serpent. Rose lifted her eyebrows as he held it up.

"Did-" she started.

"Did Mia send me this via that weird airmail envelope that courier handed me last week? Yeah. Dunno how the fuck she got ahold of it, but, uh..."

A small black and white photograph was paperclipped to the front. A little boy, facing front, dressed in an old-fashioned collared shirt and V-neck sweater. His round face and bowl-cut hair were those of a stranger, but Rose knew his eyes all too well.

"It's your file," she murmured.

"Sure is. The real deal." His whole life. All the lost decades of it, pieced together by Ouroboros researchers in some distant facility. His past, there in his hands.

"Are you gonna open it?" Rose asked.

Heisenberg considered. Then, in one movement, he tossed it. It spun into the air and over the edge of the cliff, gone in an instant.

"Nah," he said.

He settled again by Rose's side. The three of them watched the sun, watched it sink beneath the horizon, watched the shadows creep long over the sea.

Rose felt a stirring of dread at the darkness, so like the depths of the Black God, the depths of Miranda's grief. She still didn't fully understand what she'd inherited, what it meant for the future. She'd probably never understand it, not unless she lived, as Miranda had said, a long, long life.

And as to who she was?

Maybe there were no real answers.

Heisenberg must have sensed her discomfit. He gave her cheek a light poke with his thumb. "You okay, kid?"

"Yeah. Just..." She let out her breath. "You'll always have my back, right?"

"As demonstrated."

"Good."

"Good?"

She looked up at him, and Donna. And yeah, they were terrible. And yeah, they'd done some really, really bad shit. And yeah, they were all mutant monsters.

But so was she.

It filled her, then, with a pang so strong it was close to pain. That she was so she was who she was, in this place, in this body. That they were there with her.

She leaned into Heisenberg, squeezed Donna's hand. "Good that I found you again."

It didn't matter who she was. She'd figure out everything she needed to know herself. And she wouldn't be alone, not even if the night grew dark and the wolves began to howl. They would be with her every step of the path.

"Not gonna get sick of us monsters, kid?" Heisenberg said.

"You're not just monsters," Rose told him. "You're worse. You're family."

[partytime33]

Me ranting about the Mario Movie

MAJOR SPOILERS!!!! I just finished watching the movie and I'm gonna go on a massive rant, how could this not have spoilers. Also, "minor" swearing and Bowuigi shipping.

Lets start with the characters shall we?

Okay, first off, Chris Pratt wasn't as bad as he could've been, so no complaints there.

Luigi, purest bean who ever lived, SO WHERE IS HIS PLOT RELEVANCE??!??!?!

Peach is such a BAD-ASS! YOU GO GIRL!! YOU AIN'T NO PRINCESS YOU'RE A MOTHERTRUCKING QUEEN.

Toad, Good, really enjoyed his parts.

Donkey Kong, Funny at points but overall is just annoying.

Cranky Kong, Good! Considering how bad his son was.

That leader Para-trooper with the blue shell armour, excellent. Will talk about him later.

Now, to get to the big one, everyone already knows that Jack Black was amazing in the trailer, and Jack Black is. The problem is Bowser's motives. SPOILERS STARTING PROPERLY NOW.

Bowser's lines have changed slightly in the trailer. The biggest dip is when he's questioning Luigi, who takes half the movie to get to his castle, and Bowser says;

"I'm not sure if you know who I am. But I'm about to marry a princess, and rule the world."

Then Luigi replies with his typical unenthusiastic "yay" (which if you ask me is so monotone because he's disappointed that this beast is taken) with the chin tilt we know and love.

Basically, Bowser's entire reason for ruling the world is because he loves Peach and stole the super star just to impress her enough to ask for her hand in marriage.

This is redeemed slightly, because he plans to just use the star and destroy the mushroom kingdom if she refuses his marriage proposal. But it cannot make up for the cringe-fest that is shown for a good portion of Bowser's scenes.

There was a clip of Bowser playing a piano, which, further confirmed the rumor that Bowser would have a song. This rumor turned out to be true, with the most awful song in recent movie years. (Lyrically wise, Jack Black fricking killed those notes)

The song is like; ooh Peach, you're so cool, come live with me and rule. Ya da ya da, heterosexual love interest which no one could care anyless about. Then Kamek comes in and tells him about Mario, to which Bowser responds with, "is the princess into him?" And if that isn't enough, the next scene Luigi is FINALLY IN BOWSERS CASTLE!!! AND GUESS WHAT?? GUESS F*CKING WHAT?

ITS THE ONLY BLOODY SCENE THE TWO OF THEM INTERACT. ITS JUST THE INTEROGGATION AND THAT'S IT!!!!

Nothing else whatsoever!! Bowuigi Fandom, I'm sorry for the disappointment, there is the full body spin and the mustache rip and the chin tilt and then Bowser shoves the precious bean to the floor! That's it!

And you wanna know what we get instead? KAMEK DRESSING UP AS PEACH FOR BOWSER TO PRACTISE PROPOSING. WHAT IS EVEN THE POINT OF LIVING???

(I'd like to add here that the blue Lumalee has more lines and makes all the penguins depressed and insane)

NINTENDO WHERE DID KAMEK COME FROM? IF YOU'RE GONNA BE GAY ABOUT STUFF BE GAY WITH THE ACTUAL STUFF WE CARE ABOUT F***!!

And then, Nintendo, you have the AUDACITY to shove Luigi to the side? His whole plot relevance is just to give Mario an excuse to go on the big adventure with Peach! Sure he has that redemption bit at the end because he was "too scared".

There are SO many cliches in this movie, like family doesn't believe in start up company, slow-mo scream (there were FOUR of those.) And they use the phrase "Mamma mia!" SO TERRIBLY!

What really sucks is that the world building and animation style is GORGEOUS! It looks so good and is ruined by it's basic plot and cliche characters.

The Mario family is introduced, which adds physically nothing to the plot or the other characters. Foreman Spike is also in this, but is not used correctly. What I think should have been done, is that Spike actually sent the brothers down to the mega-pipe place after they left his company for the plumbing job and was hoping to get revenge on them for doing so!

But no, he's just used to make the brother's doubt themselves, which you know, THEIR FAMILY DOES MINUTES LATER.

On the plus side, my final note and my favorite part of the movie. The blue para-koopa who's incharge of the Koopa army. When the gang's on the rainbow road the para goes after Mario himself and tries to kill him. However, instead Mario and DK destroy his kart, it goes up in flames and the two celebrate. But then, out of the fire, he walks forward, an inch from death and yells, "You can't escape meee!" And get this;

You know how he's the only Koopa (seemingly) with a blue shell instead of green or red?

And you know how in the trailers we see when the Koopa get stomped they turn into shells?

"You can't escape me"...

He turns into, a blue shell, flies high above Mario's head and smashes down onto his kart, pretty much taken straight out of Mario Kart, sure it's a seemingly obvious gimmick, but that's what made it so worth it.

Right, felt good to spend an hour ranting about a movie made for kids! Didn't know what I expected from the company that made The Grinch, but thank you, for humouring me with your time and attention.

[andrewmoocow]

Steven Universe Snake Eyes chapter 1: Home is Where the Heart Is (originally posted on August 28, 2023)

AN: This is it, everyone. The end finally begins here. We are about to embark on the final installment of Steven Universe: Alternate Future, a grand finale three years in the making. But before we begin, a little history lesson. I intended to follow up Alternate Future with just one sequel, but because I just can't stop at just one story, it soon sprang up into the little shared universe you see before you. Afterwards, I got the idea of the Snake People after watching Planet Hulk on Netflix, which some of you may remember from an answer to an ask I got on my Tumblr, in addition to Thor Ragnarok and Ratchet Deadlocked. So, I slowly began planting the seeds for this epic conclusion throughout most of the previous stories, mainly in The Black Pearl Brigade, which I used as an outlet to expand on this version of Steven's universe and introduce new characters that would play a role in Snake Eyes. Now that we've set the stage, let us begin at last.

Synopsis: Steven returns home to Beach City, but the Gems have gone missing. When Black Rutile explains where the Gems have been taken, Steven goes on a rescue mission.

Cast:

Zach Callison as Steven

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Tom Scharpling as Greg

Grace Rolek as Connie

Zach Steel as Ronaldo

Dee Bradley Baker as Lion

Della Saba as Aquamarine

Charlyne Yi as Eyeball, Doc, Navy, Leggy, Army

Christine Pedi as Holly Blue Agate

Casey Lee Williams as Cat's Eye

Avi Roque as Cinnabar

Awkwafina as Kyanite

Allison Janney as Pyrite

Kimberly Brooks as Dalmatian Jasper

Zehra Fazal as Zoisite

Lena Hall as Bloodstone

Jodie Whittaker as Xenotime

Kari Wahlgren as Pyrope

Melissa Fahn as Demantoid, Eyeball Demantoid

Jinkx Monsoon as Emerald, Chest Emerald

Hayley Kiyoko as Morganite

Halsey as Tanzanite

Idina Menzel as Amazonite

Mia Barron as Apatite

Jennifer Paz as Phoenix Lapis

Gina Torres as Andesine

Barbara Dunkelman as Amber

Kristen Schaal as Howlite

Olivia Olson as Citrine Twins

Neil Flynn as The Officer/Aescul

Chris Jai Alex as Sneople Soldier Leader

Henry Rollins as Captain Boa

--

"Another day, another minute spent in this hellhole." Black Rutile groaned to herself as she scratched another tally mark on the wall of her Revanche 666 prison cell before lying on her back. "A great man once said that a wise strategist gathers all his information before deciding on a course of action. Well, guess he wasn't talking about me when he said that."

Three weeks ago, by Black Rutile's estimate at least, she was taken to prison on Revanche 666 after the Crystal Gems finally had enough of her scheming to take over the universe and destroy them once and for all. She had everything all planned out too, she manipulated several Crystal Gems to her side, got the support of humans who shared her worldview, and expanded her army with previous allies and innocent Gems she brainwashed into joining her. But once again, thanks to a certain human whose last name she can never get right, Black Rutile's plans had been foiled and she was forced to face the consequences for it. Now all that she had left were the mindless conversations of her subordinates to keep her company.

"Come on, they have one female servicing a large group of males," Kyanite said while in a heated debate over the reproduction of a certain species. "That implies a species that lays eggs."

"Oh my Diamonds, you're crazy!" an irritated Bloodstone yelled. "They are so obviously mammals!"

"Please, she'd be in estrus 24/7 if she didn't lay eggs!" Kyanite objected to Bloodstone's point.

"But they don't lay eggs!" Bloodstone replied. "I don't have to keep telling you this!"

"You're both wrong." Howlite butted into the two's conversation. "They are beings who reproduce asexually, therefore they have no reproductive organs to procreate with."

"Dang Howlite, why you always gotta get so smart on us?" Kyanite asked Howlite.

"Can you nitwits shut up with your insane babbling?!" Aquamarine shrieked from her cell. "I am trying to plot our revenge here!"

"Hey, why are you the one making plans?" Cat's Eye asked Aquamarine while waking up from a cat nap. "Shouldn't Black Rutile be the one arranging everything and gathering forces like she always does?"

"Unfortunately, it seems Black Rutile is no longer fit to lead us," Aquamarine stated, cringing as she insulted the Rutile Rebels' grand leader. "Just look at her, she's become like a pathetic wet cat who's been left out in the rain for way too long."

"You know I can hear you, and I do not like what you're saying." Black Rutile snarled at her tiny second in command.

"But it's true!" Eyeball agreed with Aquamarine. "You've lost your touch, my Rutile! It was because you couldn't accept defeat that we're stuck here today, stripped of our rights and locked up like animals!"

"Yeah, I just wanted my family back!" Tanzanite yelled.

"You need to accept that we lost!" Holly Blue added.

"Yelling feels really cathartic right now!" Amber cheered, only wanting to join in as the other Rutile Rebels snapped at their leader with accusations, making Black Rutile's already low self-esteem worsen before they heard a knock.

"Hey, keep it down, all of you!" a Bismuth guard shouted. "Lights out everyone, see you all in 0800 hours!" However, lights out soon arrived earlier than expected as the imprisoned Gems heard a loud explosion from the entrance of the prison, followed by alarms blaring as a group of snakelike soldiers dressed in black and white armor marched into the prison with blasters at the ready.

"Wow, look at all these Gems!" the leader laughed in surprise. "It's like they had them all wrapped up for us as presents! Okay boys, move out. This should be easy pickings."

"No, not them!" Black Rutile cried in alarm as she instantly recognized these intruders' reptilian bodies. "It can't be!"

"Attention prisoners of Revanche 666, prepare to be enslaved in the name of the Jormagundr royal family of Serpentes!" the leader declared, striking a dramatic pose. "Everybody out of your cells, no need to make a ruckus." At the leader's command, the other snake soldiers released the Rutile Rebels from their cells and forced them into one large group.

"I gotta get out of here!" Black Rutile yelled before she stabbed a snake-man as soon as he freed her from her cell with her bowie knife and made a run for it.

"Hey, that black Gem is escaping! After her!" another soldier yelled as he helped his comrade to his feet and began firing at Black Rutile.

"If you want my soldiers, you're going to have to catch me first!" Black Rutile yelled as she turned her knife into a sword and began cutting down any snake people in her way while trying to find a way to escape.

"Where are you going?" Cinnabar asked Black Rutile. "You can't just leave us behind like this!"

"On the contrary, if you don't need me anymore, then I guess I don't need you anymore either." Black Rutile corrected Cinnabar. "In other words, adios turdnuggets!" After throwing out a few obscene hand gestures with a maniacal laugh, Black Rutile charged to the nearest escape shuttle and began taking off.

"So she's really ditching us, huh?" Emerald mourned as the Rutile Rebels watched their so-called commander escape like a coward. "I should've known it was going to happen soon enough."

"What are you going to do to us?" Pyrope asked while the snake-men busted out sets of handcuffs to put on their Gem prisoners.

"Our lord Cobralan Joramgundr has had his eyes on you for a while, and thanks to some informants, all of you are now ours for the taking." The snakes' leader stated while applying the cuffs to the Ruby squad. "Hope you like fighting for your lives."

"Finally, some action!" Dalmatian Jasper cried excitedly while the snakes tried to work around her lack of a left hand to put the cuffs on her. "Better than rotting in prison for the rest of eternity."

"Oh my sweet Jasper, you have no idea what you and your friends are getting into." The leader snake said forebodingly while applying the last of the handcuffs on Andesine. "Okay, that should be all of the prisoners! Any update on the personnel?"

"Presently restrained, sir." Another snake soldier replied as the Peridots, Bismuths, and Black Pearls were led away from their posts in a chain gang. "Preparing coordinates back to Serpentes. Our leader will be most pleased with our findings."

"Well, this could've turned out a lot worse," Amazonite muttered disdainfully while Phoenix Lapis tried to open her mouth. "And don't even ask how it could get even worse."

Meanwhile, Black Rutile was reclining back in her captain's chair as the shuttle she hijacked flew far away from Revanche 666. She had long dreaded the day that the Snake People would come for the Gems, but she didn't expect that to be today of all days. "It was only a matter of time before our ancient enemies came looking for us." She sighed in relief. "Now all I need is somewhere to hide until this all blows over." As it just so happens, she flew away so fast in her escape, that Black Rutile could see Earth in the far distance, just a little blue ball from her perspective. "Okay, not what I had planned, but maybe I can work with this."

With that, Black Rutile veered the ship towards Earth and began flying to the planet she despised so much, hoping that it would be the Hail Mary she was looking for.

--

To think it was only a year ago when Steven left Beach City to find himself. A year since he had a meltdown to end all meltdowns, nearly destroyed Beach City, was used by Black Rutile to try and destroy Earth, and finally got the recovery he was so desperate for. Now, after a year of touring the country, he decided it was time to visit his old friends, and it was a very special time too. Steven was going to turn 18 today, and he was eager to see all of his friends and family back home again. But as he pulled into Beach City and was warmly greeted by the excited townies, Steven couldn't help but ponder that something was missing.

"Gooood morning Beach City!" Steven cried as he pulled up to the Crystal Temple and burst out of the Dondai Supremo with a thunderous aplomb. "Everybody's favorite half-Diamond is back for the big One-wait." He stopped short once he realized what was missing. "Where are all the Gems?"

"Steven, is that you?" Steven could hear Greg's voice suddenly appearing behind him. "How you been, Schtu-Ball?"

"Dad!" Steven cried as he rushed up and hugged his father. "I'm so happy to see you!"

"Glad to see you too, kiddo, and happy birthday!" Greg laughed jollily before letting his now adult son go. "Wow, eighteen. Funny how time flies, huh?"

"I still can't believe it either." Steven agreed. "Feels like only yesterday that I first discovered my powers and thought Cookie Cats were connected to them. But that's not important right now, because I have a problem. Have you seen the Crystal Gems anywhere?"

"Not since this morning." Greg nodded. "Pearl got a message from Little Homeworld saying something was wrong and they went off on the Warp Pad. And that was the last I saw of them."

"Something was wrong?" Steven said to himself before he made the first conclusion that came to his mind. "Black Rutile, of course. Come on Dad, we have to save them!"

"Right behind you, sport!" Greg saluted as the father and son took the Warp Pad to Little Homeworld, which was just as barren as the temple, if not even more so.

"I don't get it, where is everyone?" Steven asked as he looked around the empty Little Homeworld. What was once full of happy Gems finding their way in life was now home to a few tumbleweeds and worried pets. "They couldn't have just vanished overnight!"

"Maybe they're all putting on a really elaborate surprise party!" Greg replied with an awkward laugh before giving it to his son straight. "Okay, you got me. I have no idea what's going on." Just then, the two heard a nervous moan, followed by a little Flower Buddy scuttling towards Steven while shivering in fear. "Oh, hey little guy. Is something wrong?"

"Dad, this is Zuli's Flower Buddy!" Steven stated as he held the little creature in his arms. "What's wrong, you little cutie? What happened to your momma?" Unfortunately, the Flower Buddy nervously shook its head before leaping out of Steven's nurturing embrace and running away. "Wait, come back!"

"I guess it must be too scared to say anything," Greg concluded. "I mean, it's not like the great big answer to all of our questions is going to fall out of the sky!"

Just then, Steven noticed something out of the corner of his eye. Above them, a streak of light was falling to Earth, immediately answering Greg's question. "A shooting star in the middle of the day?" Steven wondered to himself as he tried to get a closer look. "Wait, is that star screaming?" Indeed, the star was shrieking loudly before it crashed into the woods nearby, creating a large explosion that could be seen from Little Homeworld. "This day just keeps getting weirder! Come on!"

The Universes then raced out of Little Homeworld and took a journey to the nearby forest, the air now polluted by smoke and fire as the trail of destruction led the duo to what was once Jasper's cave, now smashed to pieces by a crashed spaceship. The two watched as a familiar black hand burst from the wreckage and pulled Black Rutile from what could've been her tomb, haggard and frantic while glaring straight at Steven. "Steven Universe, we meet again at last."

"Stay back Dad, she looks dangerous!" Steven reflexively drew his shield to defend his father with as Black Rutile lurched towards the two. However, Steven slowly realized that maybe this time, Black Rutile wasn't here to hurt. In fact, she didn't seem to even have a weapon drawn and was instead futilely reaching out to him and Greg. "Wait, something's wrong."

"Help me Steven Universe, you're my only hope." Black Rutile wheezed before she fell flat on her face, seemingly passed out from the crash.

"I don't know about you Steven Seagel, but she looks like she's seen better days," Greg said while looking over at Black Rutile's struggling body. "Shouldn't she be pretending to twirl a mustache while going all 'MWAHAHA, I'm going to kick every puppy in the world and there's nothing you can do to stop me!'?"

"Something definitely isn't right here." Steven agreed with Greg while helping Black Rutile to her feet and waking her up. "Black Rutile, it's me, Steven!"

"Someone set us up the bomb." Black Rutile woozily said as she slowly regained consciousness and quickly realized she was in the right place. "Eureka, I arrived just in time!"

"Just in time for what?" Steven asked before Black Rutile frantically grabbed his shoulders.

"Just in time for their return!" Black Rutile manically shouted. "It's been eons since we last saw them, but they found us! They're hungry! AND THEY'RE COMING!"

"Who's coming?" Greg nervously asked, shocked at Black Rutile's sudden burst of insanity before the megalomaniacal Rutile ominously turned to face him.

"The Snake People." Black Rutile muttered fearfully before the three heard a rustling in the bushes.

"Did someone say Snake People?!" Ronaldo Fryman cried as he burst from the bushes at the mere mention of Black Rutile's enemies. "I totally knew they were out there!"

"Ronaldo, what are you doing out here?" Steven asked Ronaldo, confused about whether he'd been hiding there the whole time.

"Searching for Bigfoot. What else would a hunter of the supernatural like me be doing in the great outdoors?" Ronaldo answered. "So anyways, what's this I hear about snake people?"

"Who's this idiot and what does he think he knows about the snake people?" Black Rutile asked harshly.

"Hey, I'll have you know that I somehow managed to accurately predict a good portion of Gem society lore!" Ronaldo argued with Black Rutile, utterly offended at this jab at his intelligence before Steven broke them up.

"Okay you two, break it up!" Steven said as he put the two's argument to rest. "We have something much bigger to focus on here. Apparently, all the Gems on Earth have gone missing, and now Black Rutile comes crashing to Earth rambling about snake people or something."

"My point still stands." Black Rutile said firmly. "What do you know about snake people, you fool?"

"I am so glad you asked!" Ronaldo smirked before presenting a briefcase full of information he gathered on the snake people. "Behold, the truth!" However, all Black Rutile saw was a bunch of news articles and other miscellaneous objects that seemed to her like she was talking to a complete nutcase. "Snake people, or sneople, control our government at the highest level. Look." Ronaldo then brought out a dollar bill sign while gesturing to the snake and diamond symbols. "The snake represents their hold on our country, while the diamond represents their underground mines. Or their sharp teeth! The details aren't important!"

"How does he function?" Black Rutile muttered in silent alarm as Ronaldo continued his explanation.

"However, it seems that the creatures you encountered may be invading from their home planet," Ronaldo stated. "Perhaps they were abducting other races from across the universe to fulfill their evil deeds, like maybe creating a super-diverse army to conquer the entire universe with!"

"Okay, Ronaldo, was it?" Black Rutile bluntly interrupted Ronaldo. "I'm just going to be frank with you. You're a complete idiot. I mean, snake people secretly controlling our government and your only evidence is but a scrap of currency?" She then snatched the dollar bill from Ronaldo's briefcase and ripped it to shreds. "I care little about this planet's history, but even I know this is all the claptrap ramblings of a lunatic!"

"No, my proof!" Ronaldo wailed while trying to collect what remains of the dollar he could find on the ground.

"However, I'll have to give you this." Black Rutile added. "Your description of the Snake People abducting races and people from across the universe is actually quite accurate as I've come here from Revanche 666 to tell Steven that the Snake People have abducted my minions, and they've no doubt done the same to the Crystal Gems."

"So what are you proposing?" Steven asked his archnemesis.

"I'm proposing, and I can't believe I'm saying this, we join forces against a shared enemy." Black Rutile declared, trying not to cringe in agony from making that declaration. "Steven, I urge you to assemble any remaining allies within this area and meet me in that little town of yours. The crazy theorist and I have an announcement to make."

"I can't believe I'm saying this too, but you have my word Black Rutile," Steven replied. "Wait, this isn't another excuse to plot your revenge on me, isn't it?"

"You have my word, little one." Black Rutile promised Steven, crossing her fingers behind her back as the two very reluctantly shook hands.

--

"Attention organic idiots of Beach City, heed my warnings!" Black Rutile commanded the townies' attention as they all gathered around her, Steven, and Ronaldo. "You may not trust me, but I am here today to give you all a warning. All Gems on Earth have been abducted by their ancient enemies, the Snake People!"

"That is right, the Sneople have finally come for us and they're stripping us of our defenses to make it easier for them to conquer!" Ronaldo added before getting a slap on the back of his head.

"No, you twit, they don't want to conquer us as far as I know." Black Rutile grumbled before her visor gave a demonstration. "The Snake People, as you should know, is a primarily gladiatorial race that has thrived on abducting beings from across the universe to fight in their twisted games. Their king is one of what are known as the Universal Lords, who are among the most powerful beings in the known universe who all lay claim to approximately 36.3% of it compared to the Diamonds conquering 63.7%. Any questions?" Black Rutie then saw someone raise their hand. "You there, all the way in the back?"

"Yeah, I got a question." Connie's voice called out as she walked through the crowd to meet with Steven and company. "Why are you here and how did you break out of prison?"

"It was because the Snake People came for Revanche 666 and abducted all the Gems imprisoned there, except for Black Rutile," Steven explained to Connie. "And now she wants our help."

"Wait, seriously?" Connie asked while she tilted her head in confusion. "Someone pinch me, I must be dreaming." Much to her annoyance, however, Black Rutile did exactly that. "Ow! When I said someone pinch me, I didn't mean literally!"

"Well, I'm sorry Mecha-lecha-chimichanga-habba-hooga-swagger, I don't get your human sayings!" Black Rutile replied, making Connie facepalm as Black Rutile didn't even come close to getting her last name right, almost like she was doing it to make her mad. "Anyways, they reside on the planet Serpentes in the Ophidian Nebula, which is unfortunately a couple of galaxies away. We're going to need a really good spaceship to survive a trip there, otherwise, it'll take ages to even reach the planet!"

"I believe I can help!" another voice said as he emerged from the crowd. To Steven's surprise, it was that strange police officer he met back in Empire City. This officer seemed all friendly whenever they'd cross paths, but Steven had a sneaking suspicion that there was more to him than he seemed. "Now, apologies for the sudden intrusion everyone, so allow me to introduce myself. You may know me as just the Officer, but that's just another name for the man I am underneath." The Officer then closed his eyes and began audibly straining as he slowly transformed from a human policeman into a large rat snake wearing a police uniform. "Ooh, transforming still kinda hurts sometimes."

"Oh, my, god!" Ronaldo gasped in utter surprise and delight. "YOU'RE A SNAKE PERSON, I KNEW IT! A REAL LIVE SNAKE PERSON RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME, IN BEACH CITY, ON EARTH!"

"Snake Person? I see you're using those old-fashioned derogatory terms for our people." The Officer laughed and patted Ronaldo on the head. "We're actually called Slytherophidians, thank you very much. It's pretty easy to get mixed up since, well, we look like the reptiles of your planet. Anyways, y'all can call me Aescul."

"Wait, there really are snake people, I mean, Slytherophidians, on Earth?" Steven asked Aescul. "I thought Ronaldo was just making up crazy conspiracy theories."

"See, I told you all they were real!" Ronaldo declared proudly before turning to Aescul. "Now then, would you care to answer a couple hundred thousand questions I have about your people?"

"Okay, I'll only answer a few, my boy," Aescul replied. "Now fire away."

"Mister, you have no idea what you just unleashed," Steven said as Ronaldo began with his questions.

"First off, do you control our government at the highest level?" Ronaldo asked.

"Yes, and no. We have several hidden agents not only on this world but several other worlds as well." Aescul answered. "However, any one of them being in charge is quite rare, but not completely impossible."

"Care to list any examples?" Ronaldo responded.

"No." Aescul declined.

"Alright, next question." Ronaldo continued. "Do you put us mammals against each other in things such as elections, sports, or even message boards for anime?"

"What? No! We don't do any of that!" Aescul exclaimed. "If anything, you humans are already very good at having conflicts with each other!"

"Hurtful, but true," Ronaldo said.

"If anything, we prefer peace and order," Aescul added. "Now then, you get one more question kiddo, so make it count."

"One last thing, do you recognize these symbols on our currency?" Ronaldo asked before presenting what was left of the dollar bill that he still had.

"Oh, it looks like our homage to our insignia! Although, ours is a bit more different." Aescul declared as he revealed a near-perfect replica of the snake on the dollar sign. "My theory is that of our earliest scouts of this planet played a role in the foundation of this country. You know, your national animal was going to be either a rattlesnake or a bald eagle, and we all know what they went with. But as for the diamond, well, I think it might be because our king was an old friend of the Gem you all idolize."

"You mean Pink Diamond?" Steven asked. "Honestly, after all we've learned about her over the past few years, I'm honestly not surprised."

"And what about those earliest scouts?" Connie added with a question of her own.

"Oh yeah, that guy," Aescul replied awkwardly. "Last I checked, one of them went under the name Christopher Columbus or something and did some pretty messed up stuff to the natives of this land. We don't like to talk about him much, no offense."

"That's okay, we don't like to talk about him much either." Connie accepted the Slytherophidian's apology. "So now that we know what we're up against, why have they been spying on Steven lately?"

"That's because we've been watching Steven for quite a while now because my superiors have been scouting Gems to bring to our games," Aescul revealed. "This was their way of getting your attention, by snatching up every Gem you know and taking them to Serpentes so that you'll eventually come to rescue them. And now, you've just about taken the bait."

"Then I guess we have no other choice." Steven declared firmly. "We're going to Serpentes."

"Uh, hey, quick question," Greg asked. "How do we get there again?"

"Allow me to offer my help!" Aescul declared as he hailed his police car, which transformed into a spaceship large enough to fit him and his new passengers on their journey to Serpentes. "Seatbelts, everyone!"

"Please tell me this is going to be a normal, non-life-threatening adventure." Steven prayed as he, Black Rutile, Connie, Greg, Ronaldo, and Lion boarded the disguised cop's ship.

"With you? No way!" Black Rutile laughed as the people of Beach City waved Steven goodbye. "Now snakeman, make it so!"

"Don't have to tell me twice!" Aescul obeyed the Rutile's command before he prepared the ship for takeoff. "Now then, any last words before we leave Earth?"

"I got some," Steven said as he peered out the window to face Beach City below them. "Don't worry everyone, I'll bring the Gems home safe and sound! You have my word!"

"And I'll bring evidence that'll make me famous too!" Ronaldo added eagerly, making Steven wonder how he invited himself on the journey before deciding that he already knew.

"Okay, here goes nothing," Aescul said as he prepared to blast off. "Booster fire! Full power!" he yelled before the ship left Earth behind and took off for the great beyond on what was possibly Steven's greatest adventure yet.

--

Elsewhere in space, a large freighter was sailing gently toward a distant planet, filled with alien species from across the universe locked away in prison cells. A hapless buglike Moarchean was banging desperately against his cell bars, crying to be returned to his family. A humanoid cyborg man with gears for fear dressed in pirate attire carved tally marks on his cell wall with the sword he had in place of a hand. An immaculately dressed galactic rockstar tried calming his nerves by performing his over-the-top dance moves. A massive, tattooed giant stood chained to the wall. An angelic woman prayed to her people that she'd be safe wherever she went. The space heroine Sylvia Spectre tried desperately to escape her confinement only to be obstructed by the collar restraining her powers, while her cellmate Envyrno has long since accepted her fate. A group of Metals waited patiently for what fate would await them. A flying woman resembling a jester played a mournful tune on an invisible flute.

But the most notable prisoners in the freighter were the massive amounts of Gems kept away in specialized cells to restrain their powers. Chief among them, Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl stood resilient as they were face to face with Captain Boa of the Jormagundr Royal Family's personal guard. "We're almost there, Gems." Boa sneeringly announced to his prisoners. "Are you ready for the Contest?"

--

With that, the end begins here. What awaits Steven and the Crystal Gems on Serpentes? Are the royal family really out to get them, or are they more than they seem? Does Black Rutile have anything else planned once she reaches the Snake People? And where does that mysterious Lapidarist fit into all of this? All of these questions and more will be answered in the epic twelve-chapter finale to the Steven Universe: Alternate Future series.

[averysexyleon]

I hope you're okay with readers asking you about your stories! Because I have 2 questions to ask rn!

How and where did you get the inspiration for "Mold Queen" where mold needs a mold needs a queen for itself, and slowly would die in the absence of it? And what would happen to people if no queen had take a place and mold actually died?

How the travelling across world and realm works? Wolf Hound Squad once entered to visit and talk to Ethan, Ada did as well, and Ada also send/delivered important articles from her organisation. Is that done with connecting with a living part of a mold?

ALWAYS! as for the queen--I think it comes from studying bees and ants and things. The way they live is actually kind of creepy and terrifying. if anything, mushrooms have MORE free agency than colony insects rofl. I know the symbol of the mutamycete is a fetus, but I feel like before Miranda fucked with it, it was more heart or brain shaped. just a fungus mimicing a person. I don't know. I also knew I wanted Eva to have more powers and it was a good "reason" she had more insight, abilities, etc....the mold was giving her full access to itself if that makes sense. Then when I had the idea of making her come into our world, it really raises the stakes in the story--if Eva stays human, the mold will be no more (in a way.) it'll lose its mind more or less. That kind of thing really puts pressure on the story and that's what I like. lol.

EDIT; JUST REALIZED I didn't answer this part of the question: And what would happen to people if no queen had take a place and mold actually died?

so I think this has happened more or less with eveline. her physical mold was destroyed, her physical body was destroyed, and yet ethan and mia were still alive and kicking and even made a baby. so if eva never went back to the mold realm to be queen, I imagine the network would slowly just begin to 'forget' everything. everything stored in it would die. and ethan and rose and everybody would live and maybe keep their psychic connections to each other. (if we believe shadows of rose, rose was alive but didn't have many abilities, it was going into the mold realm that gave her access to those abilities, but who knows if they carried into the real world and if they do, does she have to put the mold into the real world? the way eveline did? lots of questions) so yeah. it comes down to, do we want to leave this entire mold world behind and risk miranda fucking shit up while she's conscious in it, or do we want to keep the history alive? or something. godric just sitting down there like "ahem" LOOOOOOL

the traveling -- I don't think that people who aren't infected like chris and ada (although there are theories out there about ada being infected with other things...but that's a whole other topic) have any problems traveling into the area. I think it's more likely that they just feel uneasy and unhappy in a place like that, like how humans feel in a home with black mold in it (lol.) Where something is "off" and if they stayed longer they MIGHT get infected, like the mold might start to recognize them and try to propagate....or if they were in an area where there were spores, like underground. but i would say in general normal people aren't automatically affected by the area other than just bad feelings and sensations. I hope that makes sense?

thanksss yoouuuuuuuuu as always! I love sharing moldy ideas and thoughts with you!!!

[wintersandthebeast]

9. Different

RE8 | Wintersberg | Romance, Slow Burn | Action, Sci-Fi

Link to Master List

Ethan’s ears were still burning an hour later.  He hadn’t left the large bedroom, which had its own adjacent bathroom with cold, but workable, plumbing.  He’d showered angrily in the cold after getting his daughter ready for the day.  The new clothes he’d bought for the ceremony--all black--were itchy and stiff, but when he finally surveyed the mirror after the angriest tooth brushing of his entire life, Ethan was struck by how different he looked. 

It wasn’t just because he was angry.  In fact, the last month of his former life he’d been angry.  Rose was the only thing to snap him out of it.  Rose, and wandering the new area where they lived.  But Mia’s secrets, and then every domino after Miranda’s appearance, had only caused his anger to grow.  Maybe it was the clothes that made him look so different.  

Ethan was never a ‘black is classic’ guy.  His clothing, his taste in cars, his taste in everything had always been light, cream.  Understated.  That’s what he thought was classy.  As he frowned into the antique mirror he wondered if this was his villain era.  It was, wasn’t it?  He was going to partner with Heisenberg, that fucking asshole.  He was going to try to learn how to use these fucking powers that he didn’t want.  He had already mostly destroyed all of Miranda’s work…he intended to finish the job one way or another.  

For what? A voice in his head counteracted.  He had found it hard to decide to do anything since being revived for this particular reason…what was the point?  Everything he’d ever done seemed to be in vain.  The degree, his career?  Useless.  All the military training he did with Chris?  Useless.  Ethan wondered if the BSAA had plans all along to utilize him as a weapon.  The way they had seemed so eager to learn about Eveline.  He shook his head at the mirror image.  

What else had he fought so hard for? His marriage.  The relationship that seemed to come and go as he turned into an adult.  On and off.  Pull and push.  Thinking she was dead for three years, not moving on.  Moving away from friends and family, even before Dulvey.  And still he had persevered.  Mia’s ring was still on the marble table in the adjacent room. 

Ethan was fuming, he realized, feeling the mech heart and its familiar tugging.  What was happening?  He unbuttoned the dress shirt, peering at his chest in the mirror as he’d done before the shower.  There were scar marks across his chest where Heisenberg had likely implanted the thing, but nothing was visible.  And yet he could somehow feel it in there.  Sense it.  That hadn’t been the case immediately, but as the weeks went on, it felt heavy in his chest.  Like a bag of rocks.  Warmer inside.  He ran a hand across the scars.  

He was so furious right now that he would have taken a knife and started gouging at it, had Rosemary not been cooing and crawling around his feet. What was it the donut girl said?  Rose was a beacon.  That may have been why Miranda wanted her, for power, for some misplaced motherly obsession, but she had been Ethan’s beacon out of the dark. 

He knew it wasn’t right to put such important, heavy burdens onto children, but it had happened anyway.  Ethan knew it wouldn’t always be this way--she’d grow up, he would see to it that she would grow up independent and knowing she was loved--but as he walked through Hell, she was truly the beacon showing him the way forward. 

And right now the way forward was getting this thing out of his chest.  Healing. His ‘powers.’  He rolled his eyes.  And the way forward was also cooperating with Heisenberg, who was quite literally the closest thing Ethan had to any human support.  Everyone from his and Mia’s life thought they were dead after the Dulvey incident.  He didn’t like it, but now that he knew what he truly was, he preferred it this way.  Maybe that’s why Mia didn’t bat an eyelash at the idea, he pondered, and he turned to his daughter.  

“Well, at least you’re not a part of this ceremony, right?” he quipped, picking her up and staring one last time in the mirror. “We’ll get through this,” he said, her pink cheeks tempering a bit of the rage he felt. 

He carried her out of the room, realizing he could hear his heart hammering as he walked down the hallway.  Despite the manor’s size, Ethan only haunted the bedroom, hallway, and kitchen area.  He didn’t want to see or know what else the Heisenberg family had locked away in its other rooms.  Now as he passed closed doors, he felt the urge to look in them.  Distract him from what he was going to do.  Give him anything else to do besides speak to Karl.  

The areas that Ethan established as his were also babyproofed, except when Karl left the back door open as he always did.  As it was now.  Ethan nearly growled as he sat Rosemary down; she loved trying to outrun him toward danger, and headed right for the door.  Ethan got ahead of her and pushed the large wood-and-glass door shut.  He glanced out at the garden, wondering if Karl had set himself on fire or some other hopeful thing, and then did a double take. 

The other man was dressed in his own set of funeral clothes, black from head to toe.  His hat and coat were gone, but his glasses remained.  He was chopping wood.  A wooden cart had been pulled up nearby, where a larger pile was stacked.  

Ethan forgot his anger as he stared.  What, no big fancy metal cutting….thing…for the mad scientist?  Karl’s hammer was propped on the cart as well. No fancy steampunk axe?  Despite Ethan’s bitter inner monologue he was mesmerized by the sight of Karl looking so….different.  The sun was diffused behind the morning clouds that threatened snow, and now Karl’s brown hair seemed to pick up flecks of rust among the grey and white.  

Idiot , Ethan supplied to himself as he opened the door again, feeling his cheeks flush.  But despite his inward shyness, his outer hesitance at asking was gone.  That had to count for something.  He was determined to use his powers, even if the thought, even the words, disgusted him.  That wasn’t what Karl called it.  “Heal”?

“Karl,” he said in what was supposed to sound like a very authoritative, angry tone.  Instead it was flat. 

The other man paused and turned.  His face was easily readable even with the glasses; he was unsure if they were about to argue again, but he seemed ready.  Always ready, probably, Ethan surmised.  

When Ethan didn’t elaborate at the door, Karl nodded at--oh, there were two other men outside.  They also wore black, and had wide brimmed black hats.  Ethan didn’t recognize them, but it seemed they were from the clan.  One was working on the wagon wheel and the other was stacking the wood.  Karl seemed to excuse himself, and then crossed the backyard until he reached the doorway. 

Ethan moved back to let him in, marveling how someone his own height could move in such a manner that he always looked intimidating and aggressive, like a bear.  Even entering the doorway he seemed ready to charge, fight.  When Karl closed the door behind him, Ethan snapped, “You have to start closing the door.  It isn’t safe for Rosemary.”  

She was currently squealing down the hallway, palms slapping on the hardwood.  Karl’s eyes, behind the glasses, cut toward the child, and then back to Ethan.  He leaned in as he always did.  “Anything else?”

He was hurt, Ethan realized at the sharp tone.  This made him exhale in a sort of relief.  Karl had looked hurt when Ethan told him to fuck off in the factory, as well.  How was it possible that the intimidating, hulking bear could also emote things like hurt and pain and concern while simultaneously being flippant about everyone’s life? 

Oh well, it was a Karl problem.  Ethan tapped his chest.  “I want you to check it.”  When Karl opened his mouth, Ethan interrupted, raising his voice, “And then after this…whatever this is, I want you to…” He was gritting his teeth.  “Show me how to heal.”  

He knew what Heisenberg’s reaction would be.  He would throw his head back, laugh.  Jeer.  Bully.  Slap Ethan on the back until his eyeballs popped out of his head and say WELCOME TO THE DARK SIDE PAPA LET’S KILL THAT BIT---

But Karl didn’t do any of those things.  He was staring so intently at Ethan that the blond man wondered if he was reading Karl’s thoughts somehow.  It was uncanny eye contact.  After a moment, the brunette nodded his head, just once.  Ethan realized that Karl had…groomed.  His hair was brushed, his facial hair was trimmed.  It took years off him. 

“All right,” Karl said simply, and Ethan was almost offended that he didn’t get a bigger reaction out of Karl. 

Heisenberg removed his gloves and motioned toward the living area, where the larger front windows allowed more light to cascade in.  Ethan followed, feeling angry about Heisenberg’s nonplussed response, until he remembered something Maricara had said.  

Death changes you.  

Not only had Ethan recently been revived, so had Karl.  In a new way, right?  The megamycete crystallized their bodies.  Had it been trying to save them both? 

Karl was fidgeting, that chaotic energy inside him showing as he twitched his fingers while Ethan approached.  They stood there in the open room, sunlight filtering in, and Ethan felt…completely different.  New.  Dressed in black, both of the men out of their element.  Morning light instead of the dark red emergency lighting of the factory or the warm glow of oil lamps from the village.  

It feels right , he thought, as he fumbled with the buttons again.  

“Jesus,” Ethan muttered, realizing they were still open from when he’d checked in the bathroom mirror.  Karl whipped his glasses off and squinted in the bright light.  He stared at Ethan’s chest with the most clinical of gazes.  

“I need to--” he held up a hand.  Calloused, tan skin.  How was he so tan in winter?  Ethan stared at the painting in the dining room, over Karl’s shoulder.  

“Go ahead.”  

Karl put one palm on Ethan’s shoulder, and then the other fingers moved, palpating across the man’s chest.  He felt a strange pulling sensation and his eyes widened as he realized Karl was sending current to the metal inside of him.  Physics and electromagnetism were two subjects he’d begrudgingly completed in college, but the programmer knew enough to realize that Karl could actually kill with a touch if he wanted to.  He hadn’t thought of it before--Karl seemed to have a preference for flinging metal around and yelling fuck.  

But he created electromagnetism.  Dangerous.  Then, another thought entered Ethan’s mind as he stared, wide-eyed at the painting.  So what if Heisenberg did kill him? He’d just revive.  Was that true?  He thought of Eveline.  The only thing that even slowed her down were heavy explosives and that goddamn serum.  Jack. He shivered under Karl’s fingertips.  

Karl’s eyes flickered to Ethan’s gaze with a near-smirk at this motion, and Ethan opened his mouth to formulate some catty remark about if he’d live, but suddenly, a scene crackled to life in front of him that--wasn’t here. 

He heard Rosemary’s giggle nearby--she’d crawled back to them--but in front of Ethan was not Karl in black, in Karl’s house.  It was a young man with piercing green eyes and longer, feathery hair.  The landscape behind him was a forest.  Lush, with new rain on all the pine needles.  He could smell the pine.  This was Karl, he realized as his stomach fell into another realm.  Karl was immediately in front of him, different, young, smiling.  He had his arm around Ethan as though they’d just embraced.  He could smell the gasoline, mixing with pine and fresh rain.  Karl tipped his head to look at Ethan, the same exaggerated swagger and cocky smirk.  

It truly was Karl.  

Ethan stumbled backwards, feeling as though he’d been electrocuted--Karl’s fingers separated from his skin with a sizzling sound and he jolted back again.  The pine, smell of rain, young Karl, all fell away with another snapping sound.  The walls rattled as though it were thundering--or did he imagine that?  Ethan’s jaw was dropped and he stared at Karl as if he’d grown three heads. 

The other man looked as Ethan had always known him to--dark hair, streaks of grey.  Scarred face.  Wider, older, gruffer than whoever had just appeared to him.  But as Karl uncertainly withdrew his hands from Ethan and stared curiously at him, Ethan knew again it had been Karl in that…vision?  Same nose.  Same lips.  Green eyes.  But he’d looked so…

“Did you….see that?” Ethan gasped, feeling a sharp pain in his chest.  Shit. 

Karl shook his head slowly.  “See what?”

Ethan exhaled.  He believed Heisenberg.  The man certainly didn’t respond as if the hallucination were shared.  

“N--nothing,” Ethan breathed.  His heart was beating so fast now.  Karl glanced at him with something between hesitation and curiosity.  

“The parts are getting jammed,” he said simply.  “I think your body’s…growin’ around ‘em.” 

“My…what?” 

Karl shook his head.  “The reactor, it’s…it needs oxygen,” he said, trying to simplify.  “On corpses I just put a vent.  With you, the supply was supposed to come from your blood.” 

“Okay,” Ethan said, with a tone that added, “But now what?”

“Far as I can tell without openin’ you up, it’s like scar tissue.  I heated up the metal, burned some of it away.” 

“You what?”

Karl shrugged, flinging his hands out.  “You’ve gotta lotta….tissue-” mold, “-wrappin’ around the parts.  Your body probably wants to heal.  Remove what it sees as--”

“A foreign object,” Ethan exhaled.  Karl nodded.  

Ethan squinted.  “You can heat up metal, can’t you?”

Karl nodded again, staring curiously as though he didn’t know where Ethan was going with this.  

The other began buttoning up his shirt.  He recalled the monstrous drilling equipment coming at him, the unlikely hole in the corner.  And then the red hot handcuffs which he could easily separate, while Karl’s voice yelled somewhere overhead about American ground beef.  The metal handcuffs singed his skin far before he flung the chain at the rotor.  

“You…” Just as he put two and two together, the chimes rang, interrupting them.  

Both men turned toward the door.  

[atarashimono-blog]

Dear Mia

Dear Mia

I don’t know if you’re ever going to read this. No-one else will – I have no followers, no-one else knows I have a tumblr, and this is my first (and perhaps only) post. So, this is essentially just a private message, unless I’m wrong about how tumblr works.

I fear you won’t accept that long, detailed apology I wrote for you on the 9th. In other words, I think I’ve already ruined everything. As a result of my mistakes, you’ll probably continue to live a very difficult life without ever experiencing, or even fully understanding, the alternative. It’s statistically unlikely that you’ll find another route out of poverty. Things aren’t looking good for me either. I can’t go an hour on the internet without seeing or hearing something that reminds me of you and breaks me into tears. I can’t properly concentrate on anything any more, and even day-to-day tasks like feeding Storm now take far longer than they should. The month of constant stress and grief may have also resulted in heart problems, but I’m not certain about that yet. Even if I’m physically okay, emotionally I’m not recovering. I’ve destroyed both of our futures, all because I was a shitty lover and didn’t realise until it was too late.

Before that asshole chose to publicly humiliate you, he told me his opinion of the situation. I refuse to believe what he said. Mia, you don’t have evil intentions. You aren’t a sociopath or a psychopath. You don’t want me to die. The last two years weren’t an elaborate illusion. We aren’t enemies. You’re the same Mia I know, the same Mia I loved, the same Mia I still love. You truly believed, and perhaps even still believe, that you’re making the right choice, that you’re doing the right thing. I just hope you don’t keep believing that until it’s too late.

I’ve read and re-read every word we ever spoke to one another in our private conversations. I’ve listed every mistake I ever made in our relationship, written down everything I should’ve done instead, and written down everything I’ll do differently in the unlikely event that you give me another chance. But I worry that it’s all too little, too late. I would sacrifice anything to go back a month and prevent you from giving up on me, or to go back even further and avoid making so many mistakes in the first place.

Over the years there have been a lot, and I mean a lot, of girls I’ve had feelings for. But I’ve never felt towards any of them the way I feel towards you. You’re the reason I believe that soulmates are a real thing, and not some overly poetic nonsense. I don’t know how soulmates work, just as I don’t know how many strange phenomena work, but I truly believe that you’re the one. And now I’ve lost you.

Yesterday, I received confirmation that my plan for how you could move here next year, and we could easily start a life together, would’ve worked perfectly fine. It still can, but only if you want it. I can’t decide your opinion. How this ends is, and always has been, up to you.

Mia, no matter what you decide, never forget that I love you.

Chris

[realhousewives-fan]

And Straight Back in the Gutter

Somehow, these women always try to twist everything around to make Candiace Dillard Bassett look like the problem and the bad guy.

Frankly, I’m tired of it. This felt like gaslighting to me. Candiace said one thing wrong, and the women jumped on it to appear like the victims.

As if they did nothing wrong this season!

Still, after everything Candiace has been through on this show, they view her as the problem.

She has been ridiculed and mocked, assaulted by Monique Samuels and this year someone she thought was her friend tried to destroy her husband.

And it’s the treatment of Candiace and Wendy Osefo that triggers a lot of the viewers as it resembles the signs of colorism.

Chris Bassett wanted to say his piece and be done with it. 

But Candiace wanted to make an example out of Gizelle Bryant to stop these types of schemes to happen again.

Instead of making her point across, it only gave the other women more ammunition to attack her with.

This was probably the moment where the need of a moderator at the reunion to help them address the use of language and the reason behind the hurt.

Because I don’t trust the other women. Especially this season has proved that their words means very little. It has been the season of lies.

Wendy herself said one thing in front of the camera and another behind it. Mia Thornton can’t even keep up with her own lies.

Robyn Dixon withheld her own stories only to try and profit from them behind a Patron.

Ashley Darby’s friend from Sesame Street was proven wrong, and they still stick with their claims.

And Gizelle? It seems like she would do anything for a storyline.

How can we trust these women?

Ashley, Gizelle, Robyn, Mia and even Karen Huger has disappointed me this season. 

They need to grow some humility, do some soul searching and join 2023.

They need to stop making up lies about the husbands, and they need to be authentic. 

Or else Bravo needs to make an example of the OGs.

[adamwatchesmovies]

Furious 7 (2015)

In many ways, Furious 7 encompasses the best aspects of the Fast & Furious series. It’s got the sexy ladies, the cars, the crazy action scenes and the stunts. Most importantly, it considers its characters and rewards the fans who have followed their adventures since 2001.

Set after Tokyo Drift, Dom Toretto (Vin Diesel), Brian O’Conner (Paul Walker) and the rest of the “family” are living peacefully in the United States when they become targetted by Deckard Shaw (Jason Statham). Seeking revenge for what happened to his now comatose brother (see Fast & Furious 6), he’s coming after Dom, Brian, Letty (Michelle Rodriguez), Tej (Chris Bridges), Roman (Tyrese Gibson) and Mia (Jordana Brewster).

Director James Wan tells you what kind of story you’re in for right away. The opening shots have Deckard Shaw calmly wading through the destroyed remains of a hospital which he apparently took on single-handedly, annihilating its security forces like they were nothing. If the previous chapter turned Dom and the crew into the agents from Mission: Impossible, this one takes it further and makes them into the Avengers. They're beating up bodyguards, infiltrating secure locations, settling scores amidst smouldering rubble and pulling off the kind of car stunts no one would try even in their dreams. You can never believe what’s happening here is taking place anywhere on Earth but to the picture’s credit, it’s very well done. The action scenes and chases are expertly shot and coordinated. The special effects are convincing and it’s creative enough that, while it’s playing out, you won’t even think about how implausible this is.

You’ve got these super cool, awesome stunts - many of which center around cars. The film also goes back to its roots occasionally, with regular-looking cars participating in unglamorous street races while bikini babes rub themselves all over the vehicles’ shiny exteriors. It would all feel so dumb and fratboy-ish, were it not for the through-thread of Brian. We know Paul Walker tragically died before shooting wrapped. I don’t think it’s giving anything away when I say this is the last time we’re going to see the character. This delicate issue is masterfully handled. We get closure in a way that feels almost like it was meant to be. The series went on beyond this film but if you take this as the final chapter in his story, it’s beautiful.

So much of Furious 7 is over-the-top and - let’s be honest - ludicrous to the point of absurd stupidity, you’d be tempted to dismiss it as a bad film but the central drama is too powerful to make that call. You just end up going along with it and by the time the credits roll, you'll be glad you did. These are some spectacular action scenes and the thrills are satisfying. This seventh entry may be the series’ best. (On Blu-ray, March 1, 2019)