#medium distance sucks

[theasylumchild]

We had the superintendent visit my new school today and he was scheduled to visit both my and my best friend’s classes. I just got told that he was very impressed with us both and told our new principal “you hired some great teachers” 😊🥰

[strangetorpedos]

seeing my gf for the first time in a month tomorrow. vibrating out of my skin

[lovethatlaiduslow]

i miss my girlfriend (voice of a girl who saw her girlfriend 5 hrs ago)

[casualdadnomad]

i just finished ofmd season two and GOD i miss my gf

[xbellaxcarolinax]

Okay but imagine sex pollen with Miguel fucking you on your back and then even when he cums he just keeps going and it’s spilling out and refractory period who and you’re overstimulated and he’s like no no you’re not allowed to tap out and he — and he —!!!!!

Sorry

MONA. You put me in a fucking MOOD LMFAO This is way longer than I intended. And its pure filth 🫣

Word Count: 2k+

NSFW below the cut.

Part 2

...

Earth 703- A post-apocalyptic world in which New York was nothing more than a ferocious jungle.

You stared off into the distance, the familiar city skyline overrun by wild flora and thick green vines sneaking in through broken windows and cracked concrete. 

“What the fuck.” You whispered to yourself, eyes now trained on the massive dragonfly that whizzed by you. Miguel grunted, punching a large finger over the screen of his watch.

The mission was supposed to be simple: Catch the anomaly—send them back to their own universe—go home. That’s it. No detours, no distractions. In and out.

“Are we close?” You questioned, pressing up against Miguel’s side at the sight of another massive insect, “I wanna get the hell outta here.”

“We just missed him.” He sucked his teeth. His mask disappeared in a flash of digital pixels to reveal his scowling face, narrowed red eyes and brows furrowed in frustration.

You’ve been wandering around the city for forty-five minutes, trekking through the godforsaken jungle with no luck. The anomaly, a Prowler from some random universe (you couldn’t remember, you weren’t paying attention at the meeting), was clever, quickwitted, and inconspicuous. You’d wished Miguel had chosen Jess for this one, but he’d refused. He’d used the excuse of her pregnancy but really, she’d already complained to you beforehand that the humidity would do her hair no favors. 

“What now?” You questioned, plopping down at the base of a bulky tree trunk a few feet away. The trees were so massive that the branches seemed to kiss the sky, monstrous green leaves blocking out most of the morning sunlight.

“Keep lookin’,” he huffed, running his fingers through his hair, “we’re getting close.”

“Miguel,” you whined, your head thumping back against the trunk, “you said that forty-five minutes ago.”

“Get up,” he demanded, shooting out a web of electric red to swiftly pull you toward him. You yelped, crossing the distance within seconds, crashing into Miguel's sturdy body.

“I hate when you do that.” Your words were muffled by his broad chest, peeling your sweaty cheek away from the synthetic material of his suit. The tiniest smile ghosted over his lips. 

“I know.” 

… 

You’d left Miguel on his own for a few minutes. 

You’d gotten distracted, swinging up into one of the treetops to observe one of the colorful parrots squawking in the distance. It’d looked just like the ones back home, except this one was enormous, probably bigger than a medium-sized dog. 

“Fuck!” You’d heard Miguel yell from down below, spitting out curses in Spanish, choking on the words as coughs racked his body. He’d been waving his hands in front of his face to clear his vision to no avail. You watched as his body reacted immediately to whatever it was that ailed him, his body hunching over as if in pain.

“Miguel!” You dropped to your feet in front of him and attempted to reach for him, but he recoiled, fearing your touch. 

“Stay back!” he wheezed, crouching down and holding his head in his hands.

“What’s wrong?”

“It hurts,” he groaned, his eyes screwed shut as his body trembled, his fingers weaving through his thick hair strands to violently tug from the root.

“Stop,” you scolded, getting on your knees in front of him to pry his hands away, “tell me what’s wrong so that I can help you.” You shoved him down by the shoulders so that he was sitting with his knees out, bringing a hand to his face and yanking it up by his chin. His eyes, normally a mahogany shade glowed a disturbing red, his pupils dilated. 

“Ran into a plant,” he forced the words from his throat, his skin gleaming with sweat, “s-some flower, I don’t know, some kind of pollen.” He groaned again, squeezing his eyes shut.

“Shit, ok, ok, ok, we can fix this,” you panicked, placing the back of your hand against his forehead. He was burning, skin blistering hot. “Where does it hurt.”

Miguel remained silent, breathing harshly through his nostrils as beads of sweat began to trickle down his face. He looked down between his legs and you followed his line of vision. Oh. OH.

His bulge was tenting through his suit, fighting against the restraints of the digital fabric. The area glimmered brightly before his cock burst through the pixels, flopping out and twitching with need.

Miguel was big. 

His cock stood tall and proud, bobbing against his stomach, the tip leaking a thin bead of precum that ran down his length. 

You stared for a moment, transfixed on the angry red tip before you found your voice. “Miguel—”

“You need to go,” he spat viciously, his fangs protruding as if to scare you away, “if you don't I’ll—” He stopped himself, lips pressed into a tight line as his chest began to heave. You could hear his heart rate accelerate with every passing second.

“Let me help you,” you whispered, your hand hovering over his cock. He looked away from you, his skin flushed from his cheekbones to the tips of his ears. “Miguel, please, let me help you.”

“I don’t want to force—”

“You’re not forcing me,” you breathed, letting the pad of your finger tap against his tip, smearing his precum over the surface. Your cunt throbbed, squeezing tight with an overwhelming desire to be filled. “I want to.” You cooed, your tone causing his eyes to flutter. 

Miguel grunted, grabbing your hand and placing it over his throbbing cock.

“Then help me.” He hissed.

…

You needed a new suit. Immediately.

Miguel had torn into it, ripping the seams apart from the crotch, all the way up to your neck, revealing your chest and glistening pussy. You had no time to complain, mewling when he spread your thighs apart with his large hands, his eyes trained on the heat between your legs before diving in to eat from you.

You squealed, your hands flying to his head as he kissed and licked and spit over your cunt, his nose pressing against your clit. His tongue dipped into your hole a few times before licking one long stripe up to your bundle of nerves, swirling his tongue around it before sucking it into his mouth.

Okay—you’ve had your pussy eaten before, but goddamn never like this, never like it was a matter of life or death, as if your pussy alone was the answer to all things.

Miguel continued his ministrations, releasing a growl every few moments, licking to oblivion until you thought his jaw would lock. 

He made you see stars, groaning loudly as you gushed into his mouth. He savored your tangy taste as he lapped at your wet folds, making sure to lick up every drop he could find. 

His mouth and chin were soaked in your juices when he came back up, and it shot a fresh wave of arousal through your veins. His hand reached out to cup your face, his thumb smearing over the traces of his cum dotting across your cheek when you’d sucked him off earlier, catching some of it in your mouth before he'd pulled out, wanting to paint your face with it at the last moment. 

He dipped his thumb into your mouth, forcing you to clean it as he slid his cock over your messy pussy, smearing the underside in your juices. His body shook with need, his eyes glazed and lidded, teeth sinking into his lower lip as he whimpered something about you being so wet.

He pulled out his thumb from your mouth with a pop and watched how you panted underneath him, your exposed skin now covered in a sheen of sweat.

“I’m sorry,” he muttered, positioning your legs over his shoulders before draping himself over you, folding you in half, “I’m sorry if I’m not gentle.”

Gentle? You were a big girl, you didn’t need him to be—

You cried out as soon as he pressed his fat head into your tiny hole, forcing your pussy to open up for him as he pushed in deeper without giving you much time to adjust.

“Fuck,” you sobbed, your hands scrambling to grip his arms as he began to thrust his hips, dragging his cock in and out of you at a bruising pace. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Miguel began to babble, grunting when your cunt squeezed the life from him, the slick noises of your drenched pussy egging him on. 

Maybe…gentle would have been nice knowing now how big he was, but you understood the circumstances of the situation. This was meant to be anything but gentle.

He had you coming again, your back arching and your bare chest pressing against his clothed one before he filled you with his own spend, pushing it as deep as he could into you. He pulled out harshly causing you to moan, watching his cum leak from your swollen pussy before slapping his length over your folds a few times and dipping back in.

He fucked you harder this time until your pussy throbbed and burned from the size of him, filling you up with so much of his cum, and delighting in the way it dripped out of you. 

“Again.” He grunted, pushing his cock into your convulsing walls, slamming in deep as he licked and sucked on your nipples, leaving red love marks over your skin. You sobbed from the pleasure, feeling his weight push you into the ground.

“I can’t!” You cried, pushing weakly against his shoulders.

“You can and you will.” Miguel commanded. He couldn’t stop, barely giving you a minute to catch your breath after making you both cum again before sinking into your searing heat, stretching you beyond your limits.

You were lightheaded and spent, losing count of the number of orgasms he’d given you. Miguel growled, pulling out his cock from your abused hole and shooting his load over your body. He pressed it into your skin, smearing it over your breasts and tender nipples, down your abdomen, and finally, over your burning pussy. 

He paused, his eyes tracing over your fucked out form before reaching down to pump himself with the leftover cum in his hand.

“I’m sorry, Hermosa,” he whispered, draping himself over you again, “I can’t stop, you feel too good. So fucking tight.” He slurped your nipple into his hot mouth, sucking the taste of him from your skin as he pushed his large cock into you. 

Your eyes fluttered and you cried out, your fingers digging into the earth, focusing on nothing but Miguel's rich voice:

I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry I’m—

…

It was nightfall by the time Miguel was satiated.

You felt weak, eyes heavy with sleep and body limp. Miguel sat against a tree and had you cradled in his arms, your body nestled comfortably between his legs. He rested his head over yours, inhaling the scent of sweat and dirt trapped in your hair. 

“See that flower?” He muttered, pointing straight ahead at a few giant white daisies clustering around a tree. They were massive, like everything else in that universe, the stems taller than Miguel when he was standing at his full height. You nodded sleepily, ignoring the ache in your still exposed cunt. “Don’t go near it.”

“Got it.” You absentmindedly played with the frayed pieces of your suit, letting Miguel shield your exposed skin from the elements.

You probably should’ve left already, should’ve gone back to HQ for a much-needed shower and rest, probably schedule another meeting, but Miguel wouldn’t budge, his grip on you tightening whenever you so much as shifted against him.

“Quèdate quieta.” He grunted.

“Miguel,” you protested, “we have to go home. The anomaly—”

“I know, hermosa,” he murmured softly, “I know.” You never seen him this soft before, nor speak in such a gentle way, not with anyone and least of all, not with you.

You both sat there in silence, processing what happened while listening to the sounds of the jungle, the birds chirping in the distance, the leaves rustling in the gentle wind. You sighed, playing with his interlocked fingers over your stomach. It was strangely intimate (despite everything else that happened), having him coddle you. 

“Miguel?”

“Mm?” 

“You better get me a suit like yours.” 

“What’s wrong with the fabric ones from HQ?”

“It’s a waste if you’re just gonna rip it off again.” You heard him snort out a breath, just the tiniest thing that implied he understood your meaning. You were hoping this wouldn’t be the first nor last time you’d be under him. “We got a deal?” 

Miguel chuckled, his hand leaving the safety of your abdomen to venture down into your sopping-wet folds. You bit your lip, spreading your tired thighs, whimpering as his thick fingers swirled inside.

“Deal, Hermosa.”

...

Quèdate quieta- Keep still

[nikoniclove]

Hi!! Love your Ace in the hole fics! I saw you said you take requests here. Id love to see more angst surrounding JJ and Emily. Maybe them almost getting hurt and Ace distancing herself because she’s scared of the heartbreak she would feel if she loses one of them, so she tries to back off to lighten the blow. Up to you if you like the concept, it was just a thought. Thanks for all you do!

It’s hard to explain.

Emily gets shot. It’s a graze on her left upper arm. She’s fine. Actually fine. She’s already making jokes about it when the team is on the plane heading back to Quantico.

That’s not the confusing part. You know how she got shot. You were all clearing the house, divided into two groups. The unsub fired off a shot when he was startled, the bullet zipped past Emily just nicking her. You fired back - kill shot. That’s also not the confusing part. You’ve been in war zones as an operative and a sniper. Shooting someone who attacks your unit or your team … that’s not going to cause you a single bit of heartache.

No, the confusing part is the feelings. Again, you’ve been in war zones and lost fellow soldiers, and you never felt this … panic. It doesn’t make sense. You’re very good, very adept, at just not feeling, not letting things affect you. You keep your head down. You don’t get involved with personal things. You do the job, and you go home. Sure, you’re not a sociopath, so you develop bonds with your unit and your team. You don’t like to see them get injured. You worry about them. But the feeling that gripped you when Emily got shot was nothing like that. It was raw, deep, and thick. That feeling lingered.

Even now it’s hanging around when you know she’s okay. You saw the injury while she was perched on the back of the ambulance, cracking jokes and being sassy while getting stitched up. JJ nudges you with her foot, a silent check in. You force a reassuring smile and intentionally mute your anxious fidgeting habits. “Coming over tonight?”

Right. You’ve never slept with anyone before and then seen them get shot, so maybe it’s that, but again it *feels* different. You glance toward Emily, her sleeve’s texture bumpy where the gauze is wrapped around her upper arm. “I… umm… I… uhh… I have plans.”

“Oh yeah,” JJ asks, feigning belief. You nod, biting your lip. If your feelings are reacting like this, after sleeping with them a handful of times, getting close with them as teammates, you should reel it back in and quickly. You don’t want to stomach the raw, intense feelings if they get hurt or when they finally decide this coworker-with-benefits arrangement has run its course. You need to retract back into your fortitude and do what you can to lessen the blow before it happens. You got too attached. Keep your head down; keep to yourself. Do your job. “You okay, baby?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” you agree, far too quickly to be truthful.

JJ hums noncommittally. She doesn’t believe you for a second. To be fair, your responses weren’t exactly confident. Oh well. Too attached. Need to pull back before you get your heart crushed. “Emily’s okay, you know?”

“Yeah, I know.” At least you can say that part honestly.

When you go your separate ways at the airfield, you sit in the parking lot for a long moment, trying to justify your bullshit. You’re waffling. Both options suck. If you keep seeing them outside of work, you’ll get closer and closer until they decide it’s over. Those aggravating, confusing feelings will get deeper; they’ll bleed over into field work like they did today, and when they do finally call it, you’ll be crushed, and you’ll have no one to blame but yourself. If you pull back now, like you know you should, you miss them, and they’ve become an equally confusing important part of your day-to-day, and that’s bound to make you feel … things. Briefly you wonder if you could convince your therapist to increase your dosage to get to some nice medium where you feel nothing and you can exist without worrying about your stupidly fragile heart behind walls and walls of inner defense strategies. They’re too smart for that, and you wouldn’t actually ask because that’s not what your meds are for. Having a conscious is stupid.

The tap on your window scares the shit out of you, and Emily waves, her keys in her hand. You roll it down and look at her expectantly. “Car okay?”

“Yeah, it’s fine,” you confirm. You haven’t turned it on yet because you were sitting moping about your stupid feelings but you won’t tell Emily that.

“Don’t you have plans to get to?”

“What?” Your brow furrows in confusion. “Oh, right. Yeah.” Lying bites you quickly in the ass as you forgot you told JJ there was a reason you couldn’t come over. “I should get going. Thanks for checking on me. I’ll… uh… I’ll see you at work tomorrow.”

Emily leans into your window, so you couldn’t drive away even if your car was on and you were ready to do that. “So what’s the real reason you’re not coming over,” she challenges. “Because we both know you don’t have plans.”

“I do,” you insist lamely. With her non-injured arm, she reaches to turn your face toward her. “I don’t like feeling things,” you admit, annoyed with the blush heating up your cheeks.

“And you felt something back in the field,” she understands. “I’m okay, love.” You know. You know that. It’s not as simple as that, which is also why it’s so fucking confusing. “Hmm,” she noises at whatever reaction she reads across your face. “Come over. We’ll have dinner. We can ignore whatever feelings you don’t want to talk about. I’m a pro at that.” The offer is stupidly appealing. Aggravatingly, confusingly so. You are too attached, too invested. These women are going to break your heart and make you feel all sorts of things you’re not ready for. But you can’t turn her down. You nod slowly. “Good. JJ’s going to ride with you, so you can’t change your mind.” Emily tips forward just a bit more to kiss your cheek. “We have feelings too,” she whispers. “It’s okay.” You’re not so sure that’s the case, but that’s a problem for Future You. For tonight, you’ll go back to their apartment, spend time with and between them, and you’ll sleep. Figuring out your feelings can be for another day.

[zeroeightzeroone]

mon cœur - han jisung

love collection masterlist

genre: fluff, soft

synopsis: how did one 'i' meet the other 'i'?

pairings: idol!han jisung (istp) x fem!reader (infp)

wc ~7.6k| moodboard

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ｡ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:

'closed for construction, sorry for the inconvenience.'

jisung blinks at the paper with bold text, allowing the words to register before he lets out a frustrated sigh. he continues to read the sign repeatedly, like if he read it enough, time would speed up, and the cafe would magically finish construction and reopen. unsure of how long he's been standing at the cafe's entrance inside the company building, he takes a couple of reluctant steps back, pulling out his phone and swiping into the group chat. a pout on his lips as he taps away and sends a message to the boys.

hanji: did you guys know the cafe on the first floor is closed for construction

leader bang: yes they sent an email last week

leebit: ^^

seungmoo: lol did u not check your email last week

jeonginnie: when was the last time you checked your emails

hanji: so you all knew 

hyune: yeah cos we checked our emails

dwaekki: are you on the first floor right now

hanji: … yes

yongbokkie: haha

dwaekki: so you found out right when you texted us

seungmoo: changbin hyung pls you found out yesterday since you also didn't check your email

hyune: oh right haha

leebit: 2racha sharing one brain cell

dwaekki: ok well han didn't need to know

hanji: ok well you all suck i'm going to get coffee somewhere else

leader bang: take someone with you

hanji: i'll be fine if i take any of you, i won't hear the end of how i don't check my emails so i will go alone

leebit: hehe

hyune: you won't hear the end of it regardless

leader bang: well come back safe

he sends a cute little emoji, acknowledging chan's message, before he shuts his phone off, slips it into his pocket, and pulls a black face mask out from the opposite pocket. hopefully, the mask would help hide his identity, just enough not to draw any attention to him during his quick coffee run. jisung loops the elastics around his ears and adjusts the nose wire as he walks to the front doors of the building, bidding a polite bow to the front desk staff. he then makes his way out of the jyp building.

he takes his phone out again, strolling as he researches what cafes there are in the area; a handful of cafes near the jyp entertainment building, a lot of them within walking distance, too. however, just to be safe, jisung looks for a cafe that isn't frequented often, one that would be emptier than the competitors nearby so he can go in and out promptly.

mon cœur.

that's the name of the cafe jisung chose; the walk to the cafe is a minute or so longer than the others, but seeing as it's almost empty according to the foot traffic tracker in the review app, jisung doesn't mind the walking.

upon entering the cafe, he's greeted by the barista. jisung's first breath is laced with coffee beans and the scent of freshly baked pastries; he scans over the cafe's interior and walks towards the cash register. eyes gazing at the white walls, oak wood accents and various green plants scattered around the cafe, the interior giving off a clean but soothing and comfortable atmosphere. even though jisung knows he will order the same thing he gets at every other cafe, he lets himself look over the menu.

"good morning, welcome to mon cœur; what can i get for you today?" jisung's eyes meet the barista's, who smiles warmly towards him. 

"can i get an iced americano?" he asks, his eyes drifting over to the empty cups displayed in various sizes at the cafe. " a medium size, please."

the barista nods as she punches in his order, confirming his item. jisung grabs his wallet as the barista is transferring the respective cost onto the card machine for payment.

"it'll be ready as soon as possible."

jisung politely smiles behind his mask, his eyes becoming crescents as he waves his hand, "don't worry, take your time. i'm in no rush."

making his way over to one of the tables, jisung takes a seat and pulls out his phone, deciding to pass the time by scrolling through the messages from fans on the bubble messaging app. meanwhile, he can hear the barista working in the background, the coffee machines running, ice being poured into cups, sinks turning on and off and fridge doors opening and closing.

ding!

jisung's attention is captured by the sudden chime of the bell dangling over the door, his gaze snapping towards the entrance where he feels like his mouth has suddenly gone dry. the barista turns to greet the new customer inside the cafe.

"good morning, welcome to–oh, y/n!" the barista's tone quickly shifts from customer service to casual. "you're not on shift today?"

jisung finds himself curious and entranced by the new presence inside the cafe, his eyes following the girl who has just entered, and he walks up to the counter.

you chuckle, "of course, i'm not on shift today. i'm only scheduled once or twice a week–i do have work later. the higher-ups have a meeting, so we start later than usual on those days."

when he realizes he's been staring for a second too long, jisung snaps out of his daze and looks back at his phone screen, scrolling. he tries not to eavesdrop and listen in, but he's getting snippets here and there in between the loud sounds of machines drowning out some of the words exchanged between you and the barista. it's like he can't help it but he also he isn't sure what's gotten over him; he had seen the tiniest glimpse of your face–a quick side profile as you walked by the table he's sat at–and now he finds himself quite intrigued by you.

"well, you work at your other job more, so it makes sense. you're here tomorrow for work, aren't you?"

"that's right, are you? are you my partner tomorrow?"

maybe he's so intrigued because you're the only two customers in the cafe; with the addition of the barista, only three people are standing in the small unit. maybe it was the lack of other customers and conversations to eavesdrop on had jisung drawn to the one you were having with the barista; either that, or it's the fact that all he's seen is the quickest glimpse of your side profile, and the only thought that registered in his brain that moment was 'pretty'.

"anyway, the usual for you?"

you nod with a smile, "you know me so well, thanks mia."

the barista, whose name jisung now knows is mia, beams at you as she lets you know she'll finish his drink before getting to yours.

it's been less than a minute since she's begun his drink, and in the back of jisung's mind, he wants mia to take her sweet time preparing his shot of espresso, water and ice just so he can listen to your voice a little more. unfortunately, even if she did choose to take her time, you decided to take a seat at the table across from jisung, leaving mia to get back to her job and not wanting to leave, him, the customer waiting too long–saving the conversation for later.

you're clad in jeans and a hoodie. you place your bag down on the chair across from you and pull out your laptop, setting it on the table. your eyes glance towards the man sitting on the opposite side of the cafe. the bottom half of his face is covered by a black mask, and dark strands of hair cover his forehead. you purse your lips together to shoot the stranger a small smile with a nod of your head.

this causes jisung to snap out of his trance, his whole body heating up at the belated realization that he's staring again. only this time, he was caught staring at a stranger by the stranger herself. his focus moves back to his phone where he tries to occupy himself once again with the bubble messages, but can't help but wallow in embarrassment at the fact he was caught. you probably thought he was a creep, some stranger in a cafe you frequented (clearly, seeing as you and the barista are on a first-name basis and the fact you apparently work here) staring at you from across the room and saying nothing.

"hi sir, your iced americano is ready," the barista, mia, announces, capturing jisung's attention as he scrambles to his feet, out of the table he's seated at and up to the counter to claim his order. mia slides jisung's drink towards him, accompanied by a straw and cup sleeve.

"thank you," jisung smiles under his mask once again. the smile doesn't reach his eyes as he thinks and rethinks that you, a beautiful stranger at this cafe, probably thinks he's a creep now. 

mia bids her usual parting greetings to customers to jisung, who then turns on his heel, making a beeline for the cafe doors. the door opens with a ding and shuts behind him, at that moment mia's eyes fall on your relaxed frame behind your laptop. all the while, jisung speed walks back to the company building with burning cheeks.

"he was totally into you," mia sings with a mischievous smile.

you scoff in disbelief, looking at mia, whose grin resembles that of the cheshire cat. "he was not. i don't even know him."

"well, he may be a stranger, but that sparkle in his eyes when you walked in is something i could recognize anywhere."

…

due to scheduling, jisung didn't have to go out and get his own coffee to start his day off–the boys had gotten so busy that their managers would take it upon themselves to do a coffee run for the boys and other staff members working with them that day the moment practice began.

the day after jisung went to mon cœur to grab his coffee, he couldn't stop thinking about you. he couldn't stop thinking about the brief glimpse he had of your side profile, how beautiful he found you, how you intrigued him so much that he found himself eavesdropping on your conversation with the barista that day. how could a stranger he didn't even get a clear view of be spending so much time running through his mind?

a month and a half of schedules filled to the brim had passed before their schedules allowed enough time during their breaks for the boys to finally fetch their food and drinks on their own. it was also in that month and a half, the jyp cafe had completed the construction they had undergone and started business up again–but they were no longer jisung's go-to.

he made the short walk over to mon cœur when his break allowed him to, walking in and ordering an iced americano, sometimes a slice of cheesecake to-go if he felt his work efforts were plentiful and flourishing through the week.

to his disappointment, you weren't the one behind the bar.

instead, it was usually mia, the girl who served him the first time and the one you were speaking to that day, joon or aera. even though he wasn't greeted by you behind the counter, the walk to mon cœur has become somewhat of a routine for jisung that he enjoys, allowing him to clear his mind for those couple of minutes.

chan claps his hands together to grasp everyone's attention. "let's take a break. we've practiced without a break since we got in, so let's take a thirty-minute break to relax." he glances at the computer, " everybody better be back on time."

the room is full of agreements as everyone inside of the practice room begin to file out.

some of the boys opt to go to the cafeteria and get something to eat in the meantime, and some of the staff share the same idea as they make their way to the elevator. most of the herd is waiting for the elevator to go up while jisung waits for the elevator to go down.

when the elevator arrives to go up, jisung steps aside to avoid being pushed in with the crowd as they all squish into the small space. it isn't until the elevator doors close and the sound of it whirring as it travels up that jisung realizes he isn't alone in the hallway.

"where are you off to?" seungmin nudges jisung.

"gonna get some coffee, maybe something small to eat too."

"hmm, what are you thinking of?" the slightly younger of the two asks as the elevator going down arrives on their floor; those exiting file out on the floor while jisung and seungmin make their way inside the elevator.

"i was thinking a cheesecake slice, maybe a small bun too," jisung tries to visualize the display fridge at mon cœur that showcases the many desserts and delicacies they offer.

"i don't remember the cafe downstairs having cheesecake slices? was it a new addition after the construction?"

"oh, i'm not going to the cafe downstairs."

seungmin pauses, blinking slowly, "you're going to a cafe that's farther than the one we have on the main floor?" jisung nods, "why?"

"it's not too long of a walk, just a couple of minutes," he begins to explain. they have great cheesecake slices, and their drinks are great too, so it's worth the couple of minutes."

"i'll come along, i wanna see how good this cheesecake is that you're taking the extra couple of minutes to walk."

jisung shrugs and goes along with it.

they pass the front desk on their way out, bidding the receptionist a polite bow before walking out of the building, obscuring the lower half of their faces with face masks they'd pulled out. much like jisung had said, the walk is indeed short, maybe feeling even shorter since they filled the time discussing work–how comeback preparations have been going.

the bell dangling above the cafe entrance chimes when jisung gently swings the door open, seungmin walking in first and him following behind. the cafe is quiet as usual, with a handful of customers scattered inside–there may be around five customers besides jisung and seungmin. the large windows facing the street are where most customers choose to sit, relax, and take sips of their drinks while enjoying the street view.

jisung and seungmin make their way to the counter, and to jisung's dismay, it looks like the barista behind the bar isn't the beautiful stranger that's been on his mind.

jisung nudges seungmin, who moves his head slightly in his direction, jisung points toward the overhead menu, "have you decided?"

seungmin shakes his head, crossing his arms over his chest and making slow strides up to the counter to get a closer look at the menu. "we just got here, of course, i haven't."

the closer they are to the counter, the closer view seungmin gets of the many pastries and dessert slices presented behind the glass. the pastries sit on long ceramic plates, lined up neatly by their different type, while the desserts are lined up inside the fridge, sitting on individual ceramic plates and angled to show off the various layers. jisung already has his eyes on the new york cheesecake slice and an iced americano, but he also finds himself eying a double chocolate muffin as seungmin hums to himself and moves around as he looks.

the barista, joon, greets the two of them with a bright and toothy smile: "good afternoon and welcome to mon cœur. i'm here to help whenever you're ready!"

jisung and seungmin smile behind their masks, crescent, sparkly eyes beaming back at the barista who recognizes jisung as a regular who's recently been frequenting their cafe.

seungmin nudges jisung, who shifts his attention to the boy, "the chocolate muffin looks good, but–"

"but what?"

seungmin whispers, "we're gearing up for a comeback, should i really—"

jisung cuts him off, "yes, we've worked hard, so we deserve a little treat. plus, you'll burn it all off in dance practice later."

seungmin hums as he ponders jisung's point before shrugging and deciding on the cake. the two boys place their orders separately, jisung going first, and in the middle of seungmin's order, someone comes out from the back of the cafe through the curtains.

"joon, do we have any–" 

you had walked out, eyes looking at the many shelves, and didn't notice the customers standing opposite of joon at the cash register.

immediately you're pursing your lips together in a sheepish smile as your cheeks heat up, bowing in apology before continuing your search all on your own. this time, you stay behind the bar instead of going back through the curtains into the back of the cafe, your eyes rifling over the shelves to check and recheck the stock.

joon apologizes with a soft smile, but seungmin shrugs it off with a chuckle before finalizing his order. once he's given the receipt and directed to move to the pickup counter, seungmin finds his friend frozen in his tracks and doing a terrible job hiding how he's blatantly staring at the female barista who emerged from the back. jisung practically has heart eyes.

seungmin nudges him; with a whisper, he says, "you're staring, you know."

jisung snaps out of his momentary trance to scoff and deny the other's claims, crossing his arms over his chest–subconsciously stealing a couple more glances at you.

"talk to her," seungmin murmers, and jisung shakes his head immediately, "why not?"

"job doesn't allow that."

"who said anything about the big 'd' word?" seungmin teases, "i just said talk to her, but if that's what you're thinking of–get her number and ask her out."

jisung shakes his head profusely. even though he wants to do exactly that, he's too nervous to speak to you. he wasn't even expecting to see you behind the bar today since every other time he had come to the cafe, he was greeted by someone else.

the one time jisung doesn't come alone is when you're on shift–he likes it, of course; who wouldn't enjoy an unexpected sighting of something, someone, so beautiful. what he doesn't like is how seungmin caught him red-handed, already anticipating the teasing and jokes when they walk back to the company building.

you hand their orders off to them, thanking them and bidding the two a nice day before they're out of the cafe and walking back to the company building to eat in the practice room. when they're outside, halfway to the company building, seungmin speaks up.

"it wasn't just the cheesecake and coffee that made the walk there worth it, was it?" there was a tinge of playfulness in his tone. 

"shut up, i don't know what you're talking about," jisung denies, taking a long sip of his iced americano.

"mhmm…" seungmin hums, "as if you weren't all heart eyes for the barista that came out from the back."

jisung's cheeks flush; he tries hard to sound stern, only to stutter and stumble over his words, "s-shut up, i'm not taking you with me next time."

…

that was a lie.

seungmin continued to tag along with jisung whenever they had the time to go to mon cœur during their break, jisung avoiding the slightly younger one's knowing gaze as he smiled teasingly. it was odd how you were always behind the bar suddenly when jisung was accompanied by seungmin; whenever he came solo, it was never you. 

a blessing and a curse.

a blessing that jisung has the opportunity to see your pretty face and your radiant smile when tending to customers, and a curse when seungmin gives him teasing looks and wiggles his eyebrows playfully. 

"i hate you," jisung murmurs as seungmin dawns a mischievous smile, the two of them now standing in line, waiting for you to complete another order before tending to them.

they watch as you transfer the orders of the customers in front of them over to joon, who makes the orders behind you. before they know it, you're standing behind the point-of-sale system and smiling at the two boys.

"hi, welcome to mon cœur," your voice is like honey to jisung's ears, "what can i get for you two today?"

seungmin nudges jisung to go first, but jisung finds himself struggling to speak, unable to order even though he gets the same drink every single time he's here. jisung stutters under your waiting gaze, your sparkling eyes, and seungmin intervenes to ease the awkwardness.

"two medium sized iced americanos, please."

you relay his words back in confirmation, catching a nod from the one in a windbreaker as you punch their order into the system. meanwhile, jisung's gaze travels to the name tag pinned on the upper left side of your apron.

'y/n.' 

"anything else for today?" your eyes drift from the pos screen to the two boys standing in front of you. the one wearing the beanie you recognize as a new regular, and his friend with the windbreaker a new new regular.

you watch as the man wearing the windbreaker nudges the man in the beanie, who shakes his head in response. his deep brown eyes crinkling into crescents as he bids you a smile under his mask. you exchange a soft, toothless smile and connect the pos to the card system so they can pay. you hear the sound of the button buzz as you move to get the respective cups and set them up.

seungmin turns the machine back in your direction, opting against taking the receipt before walking to the pickup area. the two men lean against the wall-mounted tables nearby.

"y'know, it's now or never."

jisung scoffs, rolling his eyes, "i don't know what you're talking about."

even though half his face is covered by a mask, jisung can tell seungmin is deadpanning at him because of the way his eyes droop.

"i'm just saying," he shrugs, "take the chance; what do you have to lose by doing that?"

jisung blinks, realizing seungmin has a point. if you reject his advances, he can always go back to being a regular at the cafe on the first floor of the company building. if you accept, well, he hasn't really thought that far.

regardless, he doesn't think he's ready for that, despite the fact it's been almost two months since he began frequenting mon cœur instead of the company cafe. with a soft sigh, jisung chooses to nod his head in acknowledgement and turn away from seungmin, facing toward the front as they wait.

"hi!" you grab the attention of the two boys, "your order is ready!"

pushing themselves off the table they're leaning up against, they walk up to the counter as you slide the tray with their order closer to the centre of the counter. seungmin makes the move to slide the tray toward himself, nearly sitting on the edge of the counter. you bid them a friendly smile before going over to clean up whatever you see fit.

jisung nudges seungmin when he notices the two wax-lined paper bags with the cafe logo on the front. jisung picks up one bag, peeking inside to find a chocolate chip cookie, "did you order cookies? did i just not hear it?"

seungmin shakes his head, confused as he thinks back to confirm that he only ordered the two of them iced americanos. he shakes his head again, "just the drinks... here, let me ask."

seungmin looks over to you and joon, wanting to make sure he isn't interrupting either of you.

"hi, sorry!" seungmin calls out; both you and joon turn towards the pickup counter. your feet follow the direction of your gaze as you move to attend to customers. seungmin holds up one bag, "we didn't order any cookies?"

you and joon look at each other, exchanging a smile before turning back to the two men.

"they're on the house," joon beams.

"oh?"

"you guys have been coming here quite regularly for the past couple of weeks," joon explains, "it's a little thank-you treat for the support."

"we really do appreciate it," you add.

"well, in that case," seungmin cleared his throat, "thank you so much."

"we also appreciate it–how hard you work and all," jisung pipes up rather awkwardly in his opinion.

as seungmin and jisung walk towards the front doors of the cafe, they both turn back to wave toward you and joon who stand at different stations behind the counter, bidding you two goodbye.

"thank you, have a good day!" joon waves.

"we hope to see you again soon!"

…

as the weeks went by, the cafe visits went by as well.

sometimes jisung would go alone, sitting in the cafe for a bit to clear his mind in between work while sipping on a beverage and taking small bites of dessert. other times seungmin or another member would offer to tag along, also wondering why jisung would choose to go to a cafe a couple minutes away instead of the one on the first floor of their workplace. however, the members chalked it up to the quality of the drinks and desserts, finding them to surpass those of the cafe at the office.

unlike before, jisung didn't need to be accompanied by seungmin to increase the universe's chances of finding you behind the counter. it was rare but on the rare occasion that you'd be working the same day jisung would come in for his regular order, you would engage in small talk when you were done cleaning up behind the counter and not attending to other customers.

"good morning jisung, the usual today as well?"

"am i that predictable?"

"maybe our americano and cheesecake is just that good."

"hmm… you're right about that, but no cheesecake today, i'll go for a chocolate muffin."

"look at you, changing it up, making things interesting."

"i'm full of surprises, y/n."

"one day it's cheesecake, another day a muffin. maybe another day you'll be getting something else?"

sometimes small talk in passing became conversations where he'd learn more about you and small details of your life you were willing to tell him.

through these conversations, he learned that you work two jobs to make enough money to move out of your parents' house and somewhere closer to your university campus–cutting down the commute time and translating it into study time. you'd noticed how beneficial that extra couple of hours was over your first year when your friends in the city let you stay over for a couple nights. since it's the summertime, you can pick up more shifts at your other job, which pays a bit more than the cafe job, and any free days are taken over by a cafe shift.

it's also through these conversations that jisung's intrigue and interest in you has grown.

when he first saw you, he was already curious and wanted to get to know you because of how you caught his eye. now, you've caught his attention and his ear as he wants to learn more about you, your life, your personality–just you as a whole.

it's safe to say he's moved on from a surface-level attraction to a pretty stranger and into crushing hard on that cute stranger, wanting to dig below that surface and uncover what you're willing to show him. the more he learns about you, the more he has yet to discover as the questions keep coming. the more he learns, the more interested jisung becomes in you.

of course, you've also taken the time in those conversations to ask jisung about himself and his life but he keeps the information sparse and omits some details. it's left you even more curious and wondering, wanting to know more about the boy who comes into the cafe whose order you have memorized.

what you've been told is that jisung interns for a company as a media producer and that he's one of many producer interns on a team under a big company.

he could say it's a strategy to leave you wanting more, to leave you guessing, but it's really because of his job. he wants to open up to you and let you in so you can get to know him, but he holds himself back. with the career jisung is in, the risks of being open are much greater than they would be for someone in a less publicized job.

jisung doesn't want his job to shift the way you see him and treat him. he wants you to treat him as jisung, the boy from the cafe who loves iced americanos and cheesecake. he doesn't want you to treat him as a person of importance in the music industry; he doesn't want to be treated like a celebrity.

maybe it's the fact that jisung has a crush on you that sways his judgement when he wants to think that you aren't the type of person to go blabbing to the tabloids about how an idol asked for your phone number–exposing each and every detail of who, what, where and when. nevertheless, jisung wants to trust you.

its a friday morning when jisung walks into the cafe; he knows you don't work on fridays so he's shocked to see you in the cafe when he steps inside–the shock evident in his wide brown eyes. you aren't standing behind the counter but sat at one of the tables near the window with your laptop in front of you, but jisung still wasn't expecting to see you here today. you exchange a warm, lopsided smile as he walks over to the table you're seated at, slowly dragging the chair out and taking a seat.

"what brings you here?" you wonder, leaning your weight on your palm, your elbow propped up on the table as you look at the man sitting across from you.

"the usual," he shrugs, "need my coffee fix. how about you? you don't work here on friday‘s?“

you nod with a tired sigh, "that's right. can't believe you remembered that." a lazy chuckle slips through your lips, "another late start at the other job, figured i'd come here and get some stuff done before i'm holed up there 'till five in the evening."

jisung watches as your fingers curl around the handle of the mug, lifting it off the table and to your lips to take a brief sip of–what smells to be hot chocolate–before gently placing the mug on the table next to your laptop.

"how long have you been here?" he asks, you shift your eyes to the analog clock at the top right corner of your laptop.

"hmm… since around seven?"

his eyes practically bulge out of his head, "the cafe isn't open until eight."

"yeah, i got here when aera did," jisung turns to see the short brunette behind the counter before turning back to you, "helped her a bit with pre-opening and then took a seat down here."

"your bosses here must love you, free labour," he teases.

"that's what aera said before she made me sit my ass down here."

the girl behind the counter's ears perk up at the sound of her name, a loud "hmm?" catching both your's and jisung's attention, your heads snapping in her direction. the girl blinks, a wet mug in one hand and a drying rag in the other as she stares at you both. the cafe falls quiet with the three of you exchanging looks before jisung waves at her, the girl waving back with the hand holding the rag before going back to drying the ceramic dish in the other.

you and jisung exchange eye contact before a short fit of giggles erupts from the both of you, now sitting up straight and facing the other.

"you didn't wanna take the late start as an opportunity to sleep in?" jisung wonders, leaning his weight on the table.

you shake your head, "i did that the last time and almost ended up late for work."

he sucks in a sharp breath to which you kiss your teeth with a nod.

"yeah, at least i'm up and ready to get to work while i'm here," you say, taking another sip of your hot chocolate before making a belated realization: " i should let you get your usual order. i don't wanna keep you too long since you probably have to get back to work too."

jisung nods his head with a sigh, pushing himself up off the chair and bidding you a smile under his mask. when he's turned around, you've put your headphones back in too.

he knows he needs to get back to the company building so they can continue with recording and dance practices before they're off to do some interviews and radio shows gearing up for their next comeback–the company doing what it can to promote its rookie boy group. it's a bittersweet feeling, as he does enjoy his job, but he doesn't want to stop talking to you.

jisung and aera engage in small talk as he orders, the barista tapping away on the pos screen in between to make sure she's got everything right even though he orders the same thing every time. her ears perk up this time when jisung adds something additional to his order–this time, it isn't a cheesecake or a muffin. the completion of the transaction triggers a shrill noise from the card machine, and jisung slips his card back into his wallet while moving to the pickup counter.

meanwhile, you've got both hands wrapped around the warm mug of hot chocolate, your lips resting on the edge of the rim as your eyes graze over your laptop screen. your focus on reading the latest email from the university president regarding changes to academic policies and such results in you just holding the mug up to your lips and not taking a sip.

even after reading the email over twice, you can't grasp what they were getting at. you choose to take a sip of your drink, swipe around on the trackpad to close the email, and switch tabs. at the same time you place the mug back down on the table, jisung is standing across from you with an iced americano in one hand and a wax-lined paper bag in the other. his mask is pulled down, resting under his chin.

this may be the first time you're getting a good look at the man without a mask covering half of his face. of course he's slipped it down before to take sips of his drink as he leaves the cafe, getting glimpses of his unmasked face for a couple of moments before he's out the cafe doors. however, he's now standing in front of you, allowing you to get a clear look at his face.

you slip one side of your headphones off, holding it between your thumb and pointer finger while you address the man across from you, "the usual, as usual." you tip your chin in the direction of his coffee.

your eyes move to the off-white paper bag in his other hand.

"not a cheesecake this time?" you ask playfully, head cocked at an angle.

he smiles and shakes his head, "i got a cookie this time."

you hum in acknowledgement, "chocolate chip?" he nods, "a good choice."

"actually," jisung begins, "it's for you."

your eyes widen, "what–"

you quickly drop the headphone in your hand as jisung extends his arm, the off-white bag in your own hands before you know it. you glance down at the bag and then up to him.

"wait–"

jisung is quick to cut you off, shaking his head as he starts to make his way to the door, walking backwards. there's a cheeky smile on his lips.

"you got here early, and are working so hard," he explains, "a free cookie, you deserve it."

"thank you, but ji–"

he waves you off the moment he hears the word 'but.' you open your mouth to speak again but he's already rushing out of the cafe. the loud tingling of the bell hanging above the door catches aera's attention from behind the counter where she was cleaning, both of the girls now looking at the entrance, where the door closes slowly. aera looks over to you, moving closer in your direction from behind the bar where you sit perplexed with a slack jaw.

"–i already get the cookies here for free…"

aera sets the cleaning rag down as she leans on the counter, "whats that?" she gestures to the wax-lined paper bag in your hand, a knowing smirk on her face.

"a cookie."

"he gave you his cookie?" you nod and aera coos, "how sweet."

"i mean…" you blink slowly, staring at the bag in your hands. you purse your lips, trying to hold back a shy smile, "yeah, sweet."

…

another couple of weeks fly by without any run-ins between you and jisung, whenever you're on shift he doesn't come by and vice versa. regardless of whether you had the opportunity to see him, every time you saw a cookie–it didn't even have to be the cookies that the cafe sells–you were reminded of jisung and his gesture.

the sight of the sweet snack popped an image of the boy and his bright, mischievous smile as he ran out of the cafe before you could even explain that you get the cookies for free since you work here. however, aera and mia argue that even if he knew that for a fact, he still would have bought the cookie for you as a sweet gesture.

pushing the front door open with your hip, hands stretched up to your head as you collect your hair into a ponytail, you walk into the cafe greeting mia who waves at you from behind the counter with a lopsided smile–the hair tie held between your teeth. there are one or two customers in the cafe whose attention shifted to you for a moment when the bells chimed before going back to their own business, paying no mind when you walk by where they're seated on the way to the bar.

"good afternoon, miss y/n," mia greets with a bright smile, arms crossed as she leans on the counter.

the girl chuckles when you mumble back an afternoon greeting, and the hair tie between your teeth makes it hard to speak clearly.

you split your ponytail in two, pulling the sections to adjust the style before redoing your afternoon greeting, speaking clearly, "afternoon madam mia, to what do i owe this pleasure to?"

mia rolls her eyes playfully as she nods her head in the direction of the back area of the cafe, blocked off to the customers as they keep storage and stock there. you walk toward the bathrooms, going into the back through the staff door and retrieving your apron off the hooks. you notice new boxes stacked on each other, calling out your name to be counted and organized for inventory later on while you're on the move, adjusting your apron.

"when was inventory delivered?" you ask mia as you walk through the curtains, joining her behind the bar.

she hums, thinking, "last night before closing? since it was so late–joon and kino were literally about to lock up when the delivery arrived–they had to stack them up in the back and leave it for us today."

you click your tongue, shaking your head at the explanation, and mia makes a sound in agreement, sharing your sentiment without words.

"i did most of it earlier–the ones i could carry on my own," she states, walking over to the sink to rinse the towel under hot water before ringing it out, "i'll need your help with the rest."

you nod, tying the straps of your apron together behind your back, and survey the area behind the bar, looking for something to do.

"you can bring out some more cookies," mia says.

you turn to find a mischievous look in her eyes.

she puts her hands up, feigning innocence, "what? i'm just giving you a task."

at that moment, the bell hanging above the entrance jingles as a customer or two enter the cafe. mia, already standing facing the door sees the customers who come in before you do.

"speaking of cookies," she smirks, occupying herself by rinsing the towel again.

you turn to face the entrance, walking toward the cash register and are met with the familiar eyes of jisung's. behind him, seungmin trails into the cafe, also clad in a mask as usual. the two men walk up to the cash register, but only jisung ends up standing before you as seungmin excuses himself to the bathroom, bidding you a wave before walking off.

"long time no see," you greet jisung, whose eyes light up at the realization that you have noticed his absence, "the usual today as well?"

jisung hums as he thinks, "if i ask you to surprise me, how would that go?"

you shrug, "who knows? never know until you try."

he claps his hands together, nodding his head, "i like that mindset–surprise me."

you shake your head with a smile, punching in his order and sending the transaction to the card machine to complete the payment. he walks to the pickup counter, leaning on the wall-mounted tables across from it as he waits for seungmin to come out from the bathroom. meanwhile, you pause momentarily as you think of what to "surprise" him with, standing in front of the coffee machine with your brows knit together while mia takes seungmin's order.

the two men engage in conversation as they wait for their order to be completed and handed off to them at the pickup counter, discussing the details of a movie they watched a couple nights ago and parts that stood out to them.

standing beside the pastries, one of the off-white wax-lined paper bags sits on the counter in front of you, empty as you call over to mia, "do we have a permanent marker or something?"

"let me check in the drawer."

you mumble out a quick thanks before scribbling something on the back of the paper bag before sliding on a pair of food-safe gloves to retrieve the dessert that will be going into the bag.

the beverages ordered by the two men are sitting at the pickup counter, waiting to be handed off. the rest of their order sitting in two paper bags in your hands. you double-check to make sure you're pairing the correct food and drink together before calling the respective customer.

you call over to seungmin first, sliding his order closer to the opposite end of the counter for him to pick up along with napkins and a straw. when jisung walks up to the counter, seungmin is ripping the paper open to retrieve the straw from the inside, sliding it into the lid and tossing the waste into a nearby bin. you feel your body warm up as you slide jisung's order closer to him, fighting the clamminess of your hand and sliding the paper bag over to him.

you bid him a smile, jisung takes a look at his "surprise" order, eyes scanning over the items. it's his regular iced americano, minus the cheesecake, replaced by whatever is inside the wax-lined bag.

"how'd you know i liked iced americanos?" he teases, and you play along, shrugging with a shy smile.

"good guess?"

he peeks inside the wax-lined bag to find a chocolate chip cookie sitting inside, reminding him of the last time he saw you, a smile playing on the corner of his lips. he looks at you and then at mia, bidding you both a goodbye and good day before him, and seungmin are out the doors, on the way back to work.

seungmin takes a sip of his drink through the straw, looking over a jisung, "what'd you get?"

the slightly older boy holds up the bag, "cookie."

"is that your thing now? you exchange cookies?" seungmin teases, a playful smile on his lips.

jisung rolls his eyes, "i mean—shit!"

seungmin stops in his tracks when jisung hurls forward, tripping over something. thankfully, he caught himself fast enough that he didn't end up falling on the sidewalk, what did end up falling was the paper bag with the cookie inside and a bit of his iced americano when he tightened his grip around it, squeezing some of the beverage out.

seungmin looks around the pavement, trying to identify what caused jisung to trip, only to be met with the flat cement, "how did you manage to trip over nothing?" seungmin scoffs with a chuckle, eyes then moving to jisung's feet that are clad in chunky shoes. he clicks his tongue, "never mind, i see it now."

jisung doesn't reply, staring at the pavement.

"are you okay?" seungmin finally asks, wondering why the boy wasn't coming up with a snarky reply or spitting out a flustered excuse with embarrassment. he blinks at the boy who stares at the pavement, jisung points to the bag.

seungmin tears his eyes off his band member, eyes following the direction jisung points at. the wax-lined paper bag sits empty on the pavement floor, the cookie–now broken into pieces–sitting nearby, and ants are beginning to make their way over to the dessert.

"are you that up–" he stops himself with a quiet gasp of realization.

jisung isn't fixated on the fact his cookie is broken and being stolen bit by bit by ants; he's fixated on the off-white, wax-lined paper bag that had fallen out of his hands face down. the backside of the plain bag faced up to the sky, a message scribbled in the corner with a permanent marker.

'+82 02 xxxx yyyy, thanks for the cookie :) - y/n'

[utilitycaster]

Ok I'm probably going to regret reinventing 17th century European religious philosophy here but:

Ludinus's issue with the gods as stated to Imogen and Fearne (and I will state right now that we know he was lying or deliberately misleading at points in that conversation so I don't exactly take him at his word, but let's assume he does mean this) is that they did not prevent the Calamity. I have the following questions.

Does he have any loyalty/feelings about the Titans given that they would have killed all the people in the era of the Schism, ie, the gods averted that Calamity? My guess is no, which means that whole avenue of discussing the Titans was something of a dead end.

How should Calamity have been averted? The Prime Deities during the Age of Arcanum largely let people do what they wanted, which is what led to one of those mortals releasing the Betrayer Gods. Should the gods have struck down Vespin Chloras before he actually did anything, Minority Report style? Can the gods even predict based on the actions of a single individual or small group, because my guess is they can't, particularly since within the current stream of gameplay they absolutely cannot [ie, the reason the Changebringer can't tell FCG to stay or run is because Matt Mercer is the Changebringer and he doesn't know how people will roll; you do need to consider the medium here]. But if they could: so you think they should strike down mortals on the basis of thoughtcrimes? Or control them? In that case, why is Aeor a problem? There's a lot you can argue is justified once you permit the gods to override free will and kill people over mere potential for catastrophe.

On that note, Laerryn both was an unwitting architect of the Calamity (shorted on energy and then killed the Tree of Names, which served as a core planar defense system) but also averted the worst of it. Did the lives she saved by preventing the rise of Rau'shan and Ka'Mort outweigh the lives she took by destroying the Tree of Names? How should the gods have reacted?

Should, perhaps, the gods have all sealed themselves away earlier - perhaps post-Schism? If so, then the issue isn't the Divine Gate, now is it? Should the gods intervene or not intervene? Should they remove themselves or no? It feels like the issue isn't that they distanced themselves so that they can do less in the world, particularly if you wish to kill them, but that you really want to fucking kill them and they made that somewhat more difficult.

How do we know the gods (for example) didn't save Laudna? She was hanged and she's still alive; Morri would probably count this as saving her and I don't see the same desire to wipe out all Archfey. [real talk I find most discussion of Laudna specifically to be...incomprehensibly ignorant in its refusal to acknowledge that everything about it is player agency related, whether it's the story that the cast played out for Vox Machina or the decisions Marisha specifically made in creating the character, ie, do you think Matt should have said "well you can't play a Hollow One because that would mean the gods didn't save you" not to mention the fact that again, we are playing this within a game system where the existence Deus Ex Machina would in fact fucking suck ass; but even setting aside those reasons why this argument is stupid, it's still stupid. It's like a layer cake of stupid.] Again: do you want more intervention or less? Killing them guarantees less.

I'm assuming the problem with the Calamity is the vast loss of life, in which case, what's the math on how many people have been killed by the Vanguard or Imperium in the pursuit of unleashing Predathos? How many more will die?

If the release of Predathos doesn't result in the immediate demise of all the gods, and the Divine Gate is down, why isn't this a recipe for Calamity 2? What was the motivation for killing the gods again?

Should we kill mortal diviners who do not do all within their power to stop terrible things that may come to pass? If the issue is that some people have power without working for it, why haven't we killed all the sorcerers?

Should we be listening to a single word from someone who consumes random fey to live longer, and that's just the start of the CVS receipt of atrocities?

Is there a point where one's deeply held beliefs due to one's own personal trauma become invalidated due to one's actions as a result of that trauma? If so, why is the limit for Orym "is okay with killing people who are trying, directly, to kill you (which, frankly, isn't even a trauma response, that's just called not wanting to die, which I highly recommend as a personal philosophy), and gets upset when people defend those knowingly collaborating with his family's murderers" and the limit for Vanguard generals "family abandonment/just. buckets of murder of innocents./child soldier recruitment in multiple different contexts/eating fey as biohacking/destroying an entire city and the surrounding forest for hundreds of years (ongoing)/imperialism in multiple different contexts/I was going to make a gallows humor joke about how while neither exist in-world they've violated the Geneva Convention AND the IRB for testing on human subjects multiple times over but actually those both are in fact written in a lot of the same blood/probably some others that I'm forgetting"

[ranticore]

reading your pern fic (OBSESSED btw) and you seem to have a really good grasp on flight / flight dynamics & the physics of it. and it's incredibly hard to find a resource for more realistic dragonriding - would you mind sharing some of your knowledge, terminology, that sort of thing? i guess this is me asking you to infodump about dragon flight/riding to your heart's content lol

>:) I waited until I was on pc to answer this one

Background information about me is that I've a long history with horse riding, a love for birds, and a special interest in.... aviation (in case that wasn't obvious)

to write a dragon riding scene I kind of synthesise all of these elements - to know what it's like to work alongside a steed (balance, cooperation), to know what it's like for a bird to fly (responding to the shape of the air) and also to know basically how flight at speed affects people (g-forces, air pressure, hypoxia) as well as essential flight mechanics (the basic 'how do wings work' thing)

So for a wing to work, the air must be flowing over its surface at a speed which creates a pressure difference which then causes lift. That's very simplified but u get it - the low pressure that develops on top of a wing kinda sucks the wing upwards. That means that in flight, you have a minimum speed where lift can persist. Dropping below that speed will cause a stall (lift stops) because that pressure difference won't exist. When you climb, you lose speed, which means at a certain critical point, the wings stall. Diving back down again will increase speed, increase lift, and then you'll go up again. I recommend looking up some videos or something because i'm not the best at explaining it haha

The air itself is also important to consider and i think it's the key of what brings it all together. Air is always spinning around the margins of a wing. It's why I always use descriptions like "whirling" and "churning" and stuff like that, it's to evoke the spirally vortex that generates in the wake of a flying object. You can see the vortexes sometimes when the low pressure over a wing changes the dew point in the air, causing condensation to form:

this "tube" of air is a rapidly spinning vortex which forms when lift is happening - it's always there, but only this condensation makes it visible. next time you're on a plane coming in to land, watch and see if you can spot one, and notice that the moment the spoilers come up on the wing, the vortex stops, because lift is no longer being generated. The wingtip vortices cause drag which is why many planes have devices at the wingtips that point up, it reduces the vortices and saves on fuel!

Big wings make bigger vortices and this is what causes wake turbulence.

you can see here really clearly the shape of the air in the wake of the plane, two big churning vortices that grow and spread out with distance until they're negligible. But flying directly into these vortices will cause a smaller aircraft (or dragon) to experience that turbulence, think of it like the wake of a large boat causing waves that might capsize a kayak. Turbulence, wind shear, etc these are all fluid dynamics in the air. Something that bores me in flight scenes (and sooo many flight scenes are guilty of this) is "dead" air, air which doesn't exist as anything other than an empty medium for something to basically levitate weightlessly through. It takes power and effort.

Back to birds - unlike planes, birds have a great degree of flexibility over how they approach the air, but their wing mechanics are convergent. Birds also extend high-lift devices to fly slowly without stalling (their alula). They can catch and exploit many of the wind forms which would throw a plane of similar size out of the sky. Thermals are an obvious one to write about, these are columns of rising air that form over a warm surface. Soaring birds use high-lift devices on their wings (the slotted primary feathers) to catch the thermal and ride it without having to flap at all. This is how the bronzes work.

Queen dragons in my story fly at the bottom of the column when in battle, really close to the ground - they actually exploit the ground effect to fly that low. Within one wingspan of the ground, the high pressure zone that forms under the wings acts as a cushion, because there's nothing under it but solid ground. This means lift can be maintained in conditions where normally it would not work - low in the air, the air pressure is dense and drag is a major factor.

Air pressure is another thing to consider but that's relatively intuitive. More pressure, more drag, slower flight, more energetically-costly flight, etc. The ceiling for 'breathable' air is about 10,000 feet. Now we have to think about the rider - have you ever stuck your head out of a car window at high speed and tried to breathe? If you've ever cornered fast on a bike you'll know how it feels to bank, more or less. Your weight increases the more Gs you pull, because gravity is intensifying for you. For the physical effects on the riders I looked into fighter pilots, stuff like G-lock, what kinds of forces someone can withstand before their body starts hurting lol.

in short: flight is a complicated battle against gravity and the air is alive

[mysaintkitten]

Blush | Kitten Braden x fem!reader

prompt: kitten needs a bit of spice in the bedroom (NSFW!! NO MINORS!!)

WARNINGS: bottom!kitten, strap-ons, feminization, fingering, rimming, praise, slight degradation (light use of the word slut/whore)

word count: 2.4k (not proofread lol)

“kitten, i’m gonna trip!” you squeal as kitten holds her hands over your eyes while trailing closely behind you, you stick your arms out in front of you in attempt to blindly navigate throughout your shared flat. you hear her giggling from behind you, “just trust me, darling!”

you feel around the walls, shuffling your feet to try and not stumble over whatever miscellaneous things may be skewed throughout the hallway.

“can you at least give me a hint?”

“no hints, we’re nearly there.” she hums, continuing to guide you. the anticipation is killing you, kittens been dangling this surprise in your face the entire day. and now you’re mere moments away from finding out what it is.

she then stops you, “hold on, keep your eyes shut” she whispers while removing one of her hands from your eyes. despite your eagerness, you obey her wishes and screw your eyes shut. you hear kitten twist a knob and nudge a door open before she resumes leading you towards the surprise.

once in the room, she lets go of you and shuts the door behind her. then, you feel her creep up behind you. the front of her body is flush against the back of yours, she drags her fingertips along your arms.

“open your eyes.” she purrs into your ear, her warm breath sending chills throughout your body. you slowly peer your eyes open. you realize you’re in your shared room, the beds neatly made and there’s a box placed atop the duvet. what could she be hiding in this box? you giggle, “what is it?”

“open it and find out.” she responds, distancing herself from you and creeping over to the mattress. she crawls onto the bed and grins widely at you, clearly excited.

you sit on the edge of the bed and begin to unbox the surprise. as you pry the box open, you’re met with a strap. there’s a medium sized dildo, nothing huge but certainly not small, and a harness. you feel your cheeks burning slightly as you glance up at kitten. you had definitely teetered with the concept of topping kitten, occasionally slipping some fingers inside her while you suck her off, watching how much she enjoys the feeling of being full. she primarily preferred to top you, but sex and pleasure are extremely fluid. and since the two of you have formed a sturdy foundation both romantically and intimately, she thinks now may be the time to start exploring a bit more.

you pull the dildo out of the box, analyzing its curves and veins. “how long have you been wanting this, sweetheart?” you question, pulling the harness out as well.

she sighs “a little while now ..” she scoots closer towards you, “your fingers feel nice ‘n all .. really nice .. but i wanted something more.” looking into kittens eyes, you can tell something has shifted within her, seeing the toy again has ignited a sense of excitement within her. you strip your pants off and kitten aids in attaching the strap to your hips.

you smirk, looking down at her plush pink lips before looking back at her eyes. her eyes are just as shifty, the tension in the room becoming more palpable by the second.

you chuckle softly, “you’ve been craving something bigger for that little pussy, baby?”

a light pink blush spreads across her cheeks at the dirty words, her breath also becoming slightly more laboured. you love to just examine her. all this time spent together has made her incredibly easy for you to read. her bubbling arousal is clear as day in her expression alone.

she nods, gently batting her lashes, “i’ve been so desperate, darling,” she whines, tracing small patterns onto your hand with her finger. “it’s even worse when you’re away, my fingers don’t feel nearly as good as yours.”

you click your tongue and pout slightly, “oh, my poor girl ..” you lean in to kiss her lips, bringing one of your hands to her hips. while rubbing the smooth skin, you occasionally sneak your hand towards her ass and grip the soft flesh, making her whine into your mouth. she slips her tongue into your mouth and her kisses become needier, “you wanna get filled, hm?” you moan against her lips. kitten nods and places her hands onto you, feeling up around your thighs and waist. you pull away from her, “get on your hands and knees, love.”

she tucks her bottom lip between her teeth and shifts onto her hands and knees. swaying her hips in front of you, almost tantalizingly. her mini dress barely covering her ass.

you crawl forward, running your hands along her exposed thighs and nearly exposed ass. you flip the end of her dress up, pressing lightly against her barely clothed hole. she whines and arches against your touch. you slip her panties to the side and place a flat stripe against her opening.

“o-oh!” she gasps out of shock, her thighs shaking gently beneath her. her hips shift forward at the overwhelming stimulation. “stay still, let me taste you, baby ..” you groan against her, gripping her thighs harshly. you lap kitten up, her mewls and gasps enabling you to keep going. as you eat her out, you bring one of your hands between her legs and palm her growing bulge. making her hips jolt suddenly.

she moans into the pillows, grinding against your hand and face.

you hum against her and pull your mouth away, bringing your other hand to her hole. you slowly slide a single digit into her, fucking her slowly with your finger.

“mmh, baby ..” she whines, her voice high and airy. you place small kisses along her ass cheek and hips, sneaking a second finger inside of her. she moans louder and arches her back harder, you feel a small damp spot form at the front of her panties.

“oh, darling .. are you getting wet for me?” you purr, her arousal is nearly intoxicating to you.

“mhm ..” she whimpers, rutting her hips back to meet the thrusts of your fingers. you add in a third and her movements halt, her moans becoming shaky “use your words, hun.” you breathed as your own arousal begins to stir between your legs. hearing her moans, feeling her desperation, you could probably come from her sounds alone.

“y-yes .. ‘m wet for you-“ she groans, placing her hand on top of yours as you palm her. she moves your hand against her bulge, small breathy whimpers pouring from her lips. “you ready for my cock, baby?” you coo as you lean toward the nightstand, pulling a bottle of lube out from the drawer. “yes-s! please!” she huffs from anticipation. you squirt a generous amount of lube into your hand and coat the strap, then using the excess lube on kittens hole for good measure.

you line yourself up, teasing her ring of nerves with your cock head. “hm .. please .. no teasing, baby ..” she moans, pushing her hips back to try and get the tip in. part of you wants to prolong this and tease her more, but the other half of you needs to fuck her as soon as possible. you give into the latter, you can tease her another day.

you comply and slide the cock in while gripping her hips, a loud whorish moan comes from kittens mouth as she looks back at you with glossy eyes. her brows furrowed and her cheeks flushed while biting her lip harshly, you’re almost afraid she might draw blood. as you slowly slide back out she places her hand behind her and grips your shirt and drags her fingertips along your torso.

you bottom out again and begin to pick up your pace. you watch as her expression changes as you fuck into her faster, her eyes roll back and her mouth hangs open slightly. small gasps being punched out of her as each thrusts meets her hips.

“such a sweet, tight pussy, baby. taking me so so well.” you praise, bringing one of your hands down to her ass to grip her roughly as you fuck her.

kitten just moans in response and drops her head down and clenched her fists in the sheets, the cock filling her up exactly how she needed. you watch yourself pound into her, seeing her hole grip your cock was a sight you didn’t know would affect you so much. one of the harness straps has been applying consistent friction and pressure to your clothed wet cunt, it almost aided in the fantasy. you imagined how she felt stretched around your fingers, and how it would feel if she was stretched out on a real cock. the thoughts mixed with the sight in front of you was deliciously hypnotic.

you pick up your pace and slap her ass and you hear her yelp beneath you.

“who owns this pussy?” you purr, desperate to hear kittens fucked-out tone. “y-you do ..” she whines, barely audible as she hides her face within the pillows.

you bring your hand forward and lock your fingers into her hair, tugging her head up roughly. she moans loudly at the gesture, “i couldn’t hear you, baby, who owns this pussy?”

“you d-do, fu-ck!” she cries out, the tip of your cock rubbing perfectly against her sensitive spot. you release her hair and slap her ass again, “that’s it, good girl.”

she whimpers against the pillows, little ‘fuck’s and ‘so full’s pour out from her mindlessly. her senses being completely overwhelmed by pleasure.

“fuck me h-harder-“ she whines, meeting your thrusts with her hips. “desperate little thing ..” you mutter before fucking into her harder, kittens sounds becoming even more intoxicating- which you didn’t even know was possible.

you continue to fuck her at this harsher pace, “ha-arder!” she whimpers. you’ve never seen kitten act this way, she’s so blatantly cock drunk beneath you, and you’re eager to give her whatever she may want.

“jesus, you want me to fuck you like a whore?” you growl, pounding into her even harder. you’re afraid you might hurt her, but judging by her moans and her body language, she’s on cloud 9.

“yes, yes!” she rambles, turning her head to the side to speak more clearly, “‘m jus’ a whore, your whore, b-aby!”

“didn’t know my girl was such a cockslut .. i could fuck you like this for ages ..” you groan, glancing down at her reddening ass. the harsh pounding along with the smacks have left her cheeks clearly irritated, but it only added to the erotic nature of the scene.

“ngh, fuck!” she cries as she snakes a hand between her legs to hastily rub her neglected bulge.

you realize what she’s doing and you stop your thrusts, then proceeding to pull out. you watch at her used hole clench around nothing, gaping ever so slightly from your cock. kitten whines and attempts to catch her breath while peering behind her, “why’d you stop?”

“get on your back, i wanna see your face when you come from my cock.” you coo, hooking your fingers into her panties waist band and sliding them off. once removed, she turns onto her back, you can’t help but moan at how she looks. she’s so clearly fucked out, her lipstick and mascara smudged slightly with a faint blush spread across her cheeks, the strap of her mini dress sliding down barely exposing her tits, her flushed wet cock between her legs. she’s perfect. you then get a good look at her panties, which are significantly damp with her arousal.

“god, kitten, you’re drenched,” you chuckle lowly, “does the cock feel that nice?”

she struggles to look at you as she becomes embarrassed, but she nods.

“jesus ..” you mumble, tucking the panties behind you, “so hot how wet you get .. all f’me ..” you add as you bring your hips forward and tease her hole with the tip again. she brings her gaze back to you, this time wanting to watch as you enter her while mumbling small phrases about how she only gets wet for you.

you run your hands along her thighs soothingly while slowly sliding the cock in, “now, i want you to touch your clit for me while i fuck you, got it? show me how good it feels, sweetheart.”

her chest rises and her eyes flutter shut, she tried her best to watch you, but the euphoric fullness was too much for her to handle.

as you fuck into her at that same harsh pace, she brings her hand between her legs and begins to pump herself. her tip glistening with pre come as she twitches beneath you, her sensitivity at an all time high. seeing her face as you fuck her gets you unimaginably wetter, you think you might actually be able to come from the friction of the strap and kittens erotic aura.

“sh-it, darling, so good! ‘s so so good!” she whimpers loudly as her cock spills even more slick onto her dress.

“god, such a fucking whore. you’re gonna come all over your pretty little dress and ruin it, baby. all from my cock, huh?” you purr, dragging your nails along her sensitive thighs.

“yes, mh! so clo-ose!” kitten moans loudly, she fully doesn’t care if someone hears her at this point, all that she’s processing right now is overwhelming pleasure.

“come on my cock, pretty girl, that’s it.” you praise. your own orgasm is inching closer and closer and it’s becoming increasingly more difficult to maintain your composure.

she grips the duvet with one hand and pumps herself feverishly with the other, “i’m coming-g!” she shouts, her thighs shaking around you violently as she shoots ropes onto her dress. watching her come undone on the strap sends you over the edge and your thrusts become shaky, causing you to cum in your underwear.

you give her a few more slow thrusts before she whines and signals for you to pull out, you oblige and slowly slide yourself out of her. you look at her entire body, her post-orgasm glow evident in her face, her slightly sweaty chest, her cum stained dress, her abused hole.

“who knew someone could look so gorgeous after getting the daylights fucked out of them ..” you coo, leaning your body above hers to kiss her sweetly on the lips, “‘m really glad i bought that ..” she hums while being barely coherent, “i am too, darling.”

——

don’t mind me just pleasing my wife thank you

[crazy-pages]

What are lasers?

Ohhh, this is a fun one! And surprisingly complicated. I am not sorry for how complicated this got.

Fun Fact

Laser is actually an acronym! It stands for

Light

Amplification by

Stimulated

Emission of

Radiation

But that doesn't tell you much, so what is a laser?

The simple story

If you have something that makes light (a gain medium) and you bounce light back and forth through it a bunch, it makes extra-special "coherent" light which can be focused more intensely than normal light. This is because light gets emitted from the gain medium in sync with the light which passes through it.

But that leaves out a lot of details. Like what being 'in sync' means here, why it matters, and why passing light through a gain medium makes the light the gain medium emits be in sync with it! And that's just to start!

Why do we want lasers in the first place?

So light has this thing called "phase". You can think of "phase" as a point on a circle which rotates as the light moves. (If you've learned about complex numbers, it's a rotating complex number with a magnitude of 1.) If two bits of light with the opposite phase overlap, they stop existing! This is called "destructive interference". If two bits of light with the same phase overlap, they double in power! This is called "constructive interference". (The gif shows you how phase is related to the distance light has traveled, the left image shows constructive interference, and the right shows destructive interference.)

Now in practice light isn't a particle with a single phase, it's a big messy cloud with lots of differently rotated phases based on how far it's traveled from its origin. So two photons with "opposite" phase at one point might actually have different phase relationships at other points, destructively interfering in some places and constructively interfering in others. This is how light from a light bulb works. It's "incoherent", every photon has its own phase and they overlap in messy and complicated ways. (see figure below)

And when you try to focus incoherent light down to a point, you can only focus it down so much! The focus point is this big mess of variously interfering photons and it puts a harsh limit on how focused it can all get. So your maximum intensity ends up being proportional to the square root of the number of photons you have! This means you could quadruple the amount of light you're emitting, and only get twice the intensity! You could multiply your amount of light by 100 and only get 10x the intensity! That sucks!

But coherent light is much easier to focus down, and can be focused to an intensity proportional to the number of photons! If you multiple your amount of light by 100, you actually do get 100x the intensity when you focus it down to a point. There's also a bunch of neat and tricky ways to measure the phase change of coherent light, called interferometry, in ways which let you measure really small distances. It's also easier to make it go straight for longer. So we really want coherent light! (like in the figure below)

But ... how do we get it? Actually, why isn't all light coherent in the first place, huh?

Oscillating Electron States

So let's take an atom, and look at one of its valence (outermost) electrons. We poke this electron (maybe with a photon, maybe by running electricity through the atom) until it jumps up to a higher energy level, like this!

Well eventually that electron will fall back down to its ground state and emit a photon of equivalent energy in the process. But ... why? Why does the electron want to be in a lower energy level?

Well, the thing is that electrons don't really exist in one state. They exist as a back-and-forth oscillation between pairs of states. Like a tide coming and going back out. We can talk about high tide vs. low tide, and whether the tide is in or out at any given moment, but tides don't really do static. Nor do electrons. An electron in its excited state is actually oscillating between: a) this excited state, b) the ground state + a photon to keep the energy balanced, c) actually every other excited state +/- a photon too. But what we care about is the oscillation between a) and b), which is typically strongest.

Spontaneous Emission

However while this is technically an oscillation, the moment the state looks like b) the ground state + a photon, well, photons move. At the speed of light. So it'll just blast off into the sunset (it is the sunset) never to be seen again, and unavailable to help lift the electron back into its excited state. So the "oscillation" really just looks like the excited photon slowly falling back down to its ground state, by going from a quantum superposition of: 100% excited state -> 75% chance of excited + 25% chance of ground state -> 50% chance of excited + 50% chance of ground state -> 25% chance of excited + 75% chance of ground state -> 100% chance of ground state (wait photon come back!) -> 100% chance of ground state -> 100% chance of ground state forever.

(Yes lasers are inherently quantum, but then again so are lightbulbs and everything else in existence.)

And when electrons emit photons like this, which is called 'spontaneous emission', the photons have a random phase and move in a random direction. This is because they're 'coupling' to the possibility of a photon contained in the vacuum, which doesn't have a notion of phase or direction. (Technically they actually emit as an impure quantum superposition of all phases and directions, but that's off-topic.)

Stimulated Emission

But what if there was already a photon in the background? Let's say we keep a steady stream of photons moving through and around the atom. Well now we get an actual oscillation going! When the excited electron reaches its ground state, it just picks up a new photon to complete its oscillation back to its excited state.

The oscillation is also fundamentally different. First off, it's stronger. Stimulated emission to a preexisting photon state happens much more quickly. But also, an oscillation to a preexisting photon state produces a photon in the same state! The emitted photon has the same phase and direction as the stream of photons in the background!!! Do this with a random stream of photons and they'll eventually all synchronize together!

Huzzah! Now we have a laser, right?

We do not have a laser yet

HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

NO!

WE DO NOT HAVE A LASER YET!

Well now we get an actual oscillation going! When the excited electron reaches its ground state, it just picks up a new photon to complete its oscillation back to its excited state.

This! This is what dooms us! For every synced up photon the atom emits, it also eats one! We have a filter now, something we could repeatedly pass photons through to sync up their phase and direction, but frankly it would be very weak. It would take so many passes through a bunch of these atoms to sync up a bunch of photons, and imperfections and spontaneous emission (that's still happening sometimes, even if it's weaker than stimulated emission) would eat the photons up before that happens.

We would need something that emits more photons than it eats to make light, to make a proper laser.

But electrons oscillate between states, so they spend just as much time in the "eat a photon" stage as they do in the "emit a photon" stage. And for quantum math reasons, no single oscillation can produce a superposition with more excited states than ground states. So it's impossible, right?

Hah! We are physicists. The science isn't done until we've dragged the laws of nature into a dark alley and mugged them for all they're worth.

Mugging the laws of nature for fun and profit

So first we're going to need an atom whose valence electron has a ground state and three excited states which don't interact much with the electron's other states. (You can do this with three states as well, but it's trickier.) We're going to call a big group of these atoms a "gain medium". Now we're going to excite the gain medium, with a flashbulb or an electrical charge or a chemical reaction or whatever. This is called 'gain medium excitation' and it puts all of its valence electrons into an even oscillation between the ground state (the 1st state) and the most excited state of the excited states (the 4th state), like this.

(I made these following graphics and it shows 😅)

Now, we need the 4th and 3rd states, and the 2nd and 1st states, to have very strong spontaneous emission oscillations between them. (And for good measure, that needs to be stronger between the 2nd and 1st states.)

This means we end up with a crap-ton of electrons in the 3rd state, and any electrons which end up in the 2nd state immediately get slurped into the 1st state. This is called a 'population inversion', where there's waayyyyyy more electrons in an excited state than in a lower state, which isn't possible with only one pair of states involved.

Now we insert one little bitty photon with the energy difference between those electron states and-

BWAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

WE HAVE FIRED THE LASER!

(ish)

We have created a gain medium which outputs more photons than you put in, all synced up in phase and direction! You still need to feed that gain medium with gain medium excitation, but that's fine, even if we need to feed it with light. Because it's pretty easy to make tons of incoherent light, and what we get out is sweet sweet coherent light.

A Laser!!!

So there's a few more parts. We need a pair of mirrors to bounce light back and forth through the gain cavity. And we need one of those mirrors to be not quite perfectly reflective, so it'll let some of the light out. And we need to shape these mirrors very carefully to satisfy certain conditions, and there's also forms of coherence I haven't even mentioned here, like, there's a lot that goes into making lasers.

But this is it! This is a laser!!!

You drag physics into a back alley and mug it for a material with the right four (or three) electron energy levels, excite those electrons, then put it between two mirrors (one very slightly transmissive) and let it go BWAAAAHHHHHHHHH. And then you get an intense beam of light which can be focused better than ordinary light.

[kremlin]

what did he mean self propelled gun vs tank ??

oh, yeah, so let me preface this by saying that the whole "what is and isn't a tank" is somewhat of a meme in the same very annoying vein as "is a hamburger a sandwich". especially so because the army is doing something very silly i'll talk about later.

what is and is not a tank really doesn't really matter to someone who isn't really into tanks and the annoyance comes from all the tiny odd details the differentiate them. the following completely different vehicles could all be mistaken for the same thing:

light/medium/heavy tank

main battle tank

infantry fighting vehicle

tank destroyer

armored personnel carrier

self propelled gun

self propelled howitzer

the vehicle i mentioned, the taran, looks exactly like a tank.

but it isn't. it's exactly as described, a self propelled gun, a gun that you don't have to tow around on a truck or something. it's meant to shoot tanks in an ambush situation or more likely just blast down emplacements from a safe distance

it doesn't have any armor. it has enough to stop stray .50 cals fired from afar, but nothing more, and this isn't a dealbreaker, nobody said tanks have to be armored, the modern type 10 (japan's latest+greatest tank) is famously unarmored due to the fact the efficacy of tank ammunition has rapidly outpaced armor's efficacy in modern times. not a dealbreaker, but not exactly supportive of "being a tank".

the more relevant fact here is the enormous goddamn gun. 153mm, not that bore diameter is the be-all-end-all, but its good for rough estimations. especially in this case. 150ish mm is as big as they go. that is way bigger than any tank today, that is around where only the largest artillery sits. but not all 150mm's are made the same, and brother, this one is nuts. look how friggen long the barrel is. that mofo would be so hard to maneuver around. and the ammo suits it, it's dual-component, meaning you load in the warhead first and then the (perhaps multiple to adjust for range) propellant rounds behind it. and the HE shells for the taran were something like over 80lbs individually. the single loader's job sucked ass, and this type of configuration does not make for an effective tank. fine for a SPG though.

the thing that stands out to me is the lack of machine gun. tanks need MGs. no pintle mounted .50 cal, no coaxial .30 cal, nothing. if it was there, it would never have anything to shoot. unlike a tank. and the precious interior space in the hull and turret is occupied by the enormously sized main gun ammo.

[ansu-gurleht]

okay here is my beginner’s guide to morrowind! it talks about some of the mechanics you’ll want to know, but it’s also a little bit of a walkthrough to get you a good start on your journey. note that i originally wrote this for somebody specific: i don’t think it does, but if it seems like it’s talking at somebody in particular, that’s why. anyways, i hope this is helpful!

before you start the game:

there is only one mod i absolutely recommend you play with, and it’s not quite a mod at all.

when you download morrowind from steam or gog or whatever, you have the game! congratulations! however, what you really own is the assets of the game and a horribly broken engine. that’s where openmorrowind (openmw) comes in.

openmw is a remake of the original engine of morrowind. you see, morrowind’s original engine fucking sucks. this is for a multitude of reasons, but for me, the reason i switched was because at the later stages of a playthrough, the game will literally start corrupting your saves. don’t have that problem with openmw!

i can’t really give you a guide on how to install it and get it running better than the one on the openmw website (https://openmw.org/en/). go install it and you will have a much smoother experience overall.

before you start a new game:

before we start talking about PLAYING the game, though, let’s also take a peek through the options.

in the first page of the options, “prefs,” you’ll find some things you’ll want to switch on. namely, subtitles, always use best attack, and auto-save on rest. i’m not sure which of these are enabled by default, but enable them all.

in the “controls” section, you’re likely going to want to swap the “activate” and “jump” buttons. for some reason, the default control scheme has “activate” set to “spacebar” and “jump” set to “e”. this is, of course, counterintuitive to anyone who plays modern pc games. go ahead and just swap those around.

in the “video”-“video” section, go ahead and set your game to the highest resolution, and maybe increase the field of view a bit (i play with 75 fov, but you may prefer higher. idr what the default is, probably stupid low). in the “video”-“detail” section, crank up that view distance as high as it’ll go. i’m not sure what the default is, and i’ve fiddled with my set-up to maximize it for openmw. also turn on trilinear texture filtering and the anisotropy to the highest setting. also raise all the “video”-”water” settings to their maximum values. trust me, you can run this. it’s a new engine but the game itself came out in 2002. not the most graphics-intensive game out there.

tutorial and creating your character:

okay, that’s the options out of the way. now let’s hit that “new” button and make a new game.

watch the intro cutscene, talk to jiub, and tell him your character’s name. follow the instructions of the guards until you get to the one who asks you where you’re from. this is how the game asks you for your race. there’s no bad options here - pick whichever race you like best. you can take into account the bonuses each race gets, and compared to later games in the series these bonuses are more significant, but you can really play any character with any race in this game. it’s worth noting, however, that the beast races (argonians and khajiit) can’t wear full helms or boots/shoes. for a first timer, i would probably recommend dunmer (dark elf).

after that, go into the census office. this is where you build your class properly. you CAN take the class quiz, or pick from the premade classes. i would not recommend this. i’ve come up with a custom class that i think covers pretty much all the bases and gives a fairly enjoyable experience for a newcomer:

specialization: magic

attributes: endurance, intelligence

major skills: long blade light armor conjuration restoration marksman / destruction

minor skills: short blade medium armor spear mysticism alteration

now let me explain my choices here, to give you an idea where i’m coming from, and what those choices mean.

your specialization gives you +5 to all nine of the skills that fall under that specialization, and makes those skills increase more quickly. i’m giving you magic because magic skills don’t always increase the fastest, and every little bit helps.

your chosen attributes get +10 each. endurance determines your starting hp, which is obviously important, among other things, such as how much health you gain on level up. intelligence increases your maximum magicka. when you level up, you get to pick three attributes to increase, and depending on what skills you increased to get to your new level, you get multipliers on how much you can increase certain attributes. i recommend always increasing endurance, even if you don’t get a multiplier for it. speed, which affects your, well, speed, and strength, which affects your physical damage done as well as your carry weight, are good choices for leveling up as well. but you can increase other attributes as you think is necessary - i won’t elaborate on what each one does here, you can look it up on uesp.

your major and minor skills are what you need to increase in order to level up your character level. major skills get +25, minor skills get +10.

i always recommend at least one weapon skill and at least one armor skill for your major skills. i’m giving you long blade, bc it’s the most ubiquitous and useful weapon skill in the game, and light armor, bc it’s generally speaking the best armor skill in the game, and is also lighter to carry around as well.

i’m giving you conjuration and restoration bc having a magic skill as a major gives you a starting spell from that school. conjuration gives you bound dagger, which summons a daedric dagger for you to use for 60 seconds (and gives you the requisite skill to use it effectively), and restoration gives you hearth heal, which is a very effective heal, albeit a somewhat costly one to cast.

i’m giving you two options for your last major skill: either marksman or destruction for ranged capabilities. note, however, that marksman is not as good in this game as in later titles, and not all destruction spells are at range. destruction gives you the starting spell fire bite, a decent on touch (melee range) fire spell.

just like you have a weapon skill and armor skill in your major skills, i recommend doing the same thing with your minor skills. so i’m giving you short blade, the second most ubiquitous and useful weapon skill, and medium armor, which is almost as good as light armor, albeit a bit heavier. you can mix and match your armor pieces to great effect in this game, and wearing at least one piece of a type of armor (a medium armor gauntlet, for example) will increase that skill when you get hit.

i’m giving you spear mostly bc it’s a fun weapon to play with, and not in the other games. mysticism is an important skill for a few reasons: 1) telekinesis, which we’ll mostly use to disarm traps from a distance, and 2) teleportation spells like almsivi/divine intervention, which lets you teleport to the nearest tribunal temple or imperial shrine respectively, and mark/recall, the former of which lets you set a point the latter can teleport you to from anywhere. alteration gives you access to a lot of good spells, like feather, shield, levitate, water breathing, water walking, and open.

okay, that’s enough about your class. next you’ll be asked what your birthsign is. i’m going to recommend either the steed, which gives you +25 speed and makes walking around at the beginning of the game more bearable, or the lady, which gives you +25 personality and +25 endurance. up to you whether you value the speed or the endurance more. there are other options, of course, but i think these are best for a first-time player.

okay, after you pick your birthsign and confirm your character, you’re free! kind of. not really yet. you’ll be notified you now have an inventory menu, and instructed to pick up the papers on the table to your right. do so. then, we’re going to do something a little sneaky. on the shelf against the rightmost wall is a limeware platter, which costs like 650 gold. you want that platter. so you’re going to take it. now, you just did this in full view of a guard. but you’re fresh off the boat, so he won’t arrest you - he’ll just confiscate what you stole. BUT, if you drop the platter before he gets to you, he won’t have anything to confiscate. and since YOU dropped it, it’s technically YOURS now, so you can pick it up without any ramifications.  congrats! you just got like, 300 gold (note: your mercantile skill affects how much gold you get from selling things. very rarely will you ever get full asking price for anything).

(how do you drop the platter, you may ask? well, to open your menu/inventory, you need to right-click. very counterintuitive, i know. but you’ll get used to it. to drop an item, click it and drag it outside of any of the menus. you can either drop it directly beneath you, which usually happens, or you can place things directly onto surfaces like tables or shelves if you’re close enough to them.)

now you’re expected to go out the door across from the platter shelf. go out, and close the door behind you. there’s nobody in this side of the building, so with the door closed, you’re free to just jack anything you see without ramifications. there’s a lot of ingredients to take, if you want to get into alchemy (which can be useful, for either making beneficial potions or for making a quick buck), but most of what you want is the expensive stuff you’ll find. there’s a book you can take (books can be very expensive in this game), some silverware, a bottle of liquor called flin, a lockpick, and a shitty dagger. you’ll want to sell everything you get here except for the lockpick, and maybe the ingredients if you want to do alchemy. there’s a little chest on the bottom of the shelf by the exit that’s locked. you should be able to pick it with ease with the lockpick you just got, even though your security skill sucks atm. there’s like, 31 gold in there i think? worth taking regardless. to pick the lock, equip the lockpick (click and drag it onto the little portrait of your character in the left of your inventory screen), and “attack” (left-click) over and over while pointing your cursor at the chest until it unlocks. there’s a couple of torches you might want downstairs, as well.

after you’re done looting, leave the building. you’ll find yourself in a little courtyard. the game’ll tell you to look in the barrel by the next door, and take the enchanted ring you find inside. don’t get too attached to this ring. go into the next door and talk to sellus gravius, the guy inside. this is your first real encounter with morrowind’s dialog system. it is not like skyrim’s. at all. get used to it. this weird wikipedia like structure is going to be your best friend. you have a list of all available options on the right, and you can click highlighted options in the text itself. you can talk about whatever to sellus, but you have to say a couple specific things to progress. i can’t remember what it is exactly, but he doesn’t have much to say outside of it, so it shouldn’t be hard to figure out. he’ll give you some money, a package for caius cosades, and a note with instructions on how to find caius cosades. don’t accidentally sell the package. don’t try to open the package. just leave it in your inventory until you’re ready to go find caius.

seyda neen:

after that, you’re free to go! and this time you’re really free, and you can do whatever you want now! but that’s a bit overwhelming, so i’m going to let you know what there is to do in this town, seyda neen.

first off, almost right outside the door there’s a bosmer (wood elf) named fargoth. he’s lost his ring. yes, that ring. give it to him. that’ll earn you better prices with the local merchant, who happens to be fargoth’s friend. don’t worry, if you want the ring, we’ll be getting it back later.

now to go make some money with all the shit we stole. go to arrille’s tradehouse, which is the building with the little raised platform adjacent. the “front” door is locked, it’s actually arrille’s house, so you have to go around on the platform to the real front door. go inside and talk to arrille. in the right pane of the dialog, you’ll see the option to barter with him. click that and get to selling your shit. 

here’s what you want to buy with the money you just got (around 500-600 gold). buy all the chitin armor pieces you can. it’s very good light armor for this stage in the game. buy the iron saber for now; you’ll be replacing it soon but you need something, and it’s cheap. buy one of the journeyman’s probes - you need these to disable traps - and one of the journeyman’s lockpicks, since the one you stole from the census office only has 10 uses. buy 3 bottles of sujamma - it’s a regional liquor that gives you +50 strength and -50 intelligence for 60 seconds. it’s VERY powerful for dealing with foes you normally shouldn’t be able to handle at a lower level. note the intelligence drop though: if you need to cast a spell, cast it before you drink the sujamma. buy 2 scrolls of almsivi intervention - like i said earlier, this teleports you to the nearest tribunal temple. lastly, buy 2 scrolls of ondusi’s unhinging. sometimes you need to open something that you just can’t pick with your too-low security skill. that’s where this scroll comes in.

yes, you just spent like, all of the money you just earned. it’s okay. we’re going to make it back and then some, soon.

before you leave arrille’s, go upstairs (behind him). talk to the guy, hrisskar flat-foot, at the top of the stairs. he’ll offer you a topic about recovering gold. he wants you to find out where fargoth (the ring guy) is hiding his gold and valuables. you’re going to help him find it, because YOU want those valuables as well. we’ll get back to this quest later, though.

next, talk to elone, the redguard behind the counter. she’s a scout, which means she knows a lot about the land. you can ask scouts all sorts of interesting questions about geography. but what you want from elone is directions to balmora. ask her about balmora and she’ll give you said directions in the form of a note.

finally, talk to the wizard lookin’ fella in the corner. ask him about the latest rumors. keep in mind what he says about mentor’s ring - we’ll be pursuing this later.

now, let’s make sure we equip all the armor and weapon we just bought. right-click to bring up your inventory/stats/map/magic menu, click on each piece of armor and weapon, and drag them onto the little portrait of your character to the left. that’s it! you’re equipped and ready to face the wilderness.

the wilderness, plus notes on combat:

leave arrille’s tradehouse from the door you came in from. jump off the corner of the platform into the water below, and cross that little river, heading west. on the far shore, you’ll find your first foe: a mudcrab! very scaaaaary! this is your introduction to combat. it works a little differently in this game. first of all, just because you SEE your weapon connect with an enemy, doesn’t mean it’s going to HIT necessarily. this game plays off of dice-rolls, and a lot of factors contribute to whether or not you’re gonna actually do damage. but the two most important factors are: 1) your level of skill with the weapon you’re using, and 2) your fatigue. that’s the green bar in the bottom left of your screen, what you’d call in skyrim your “stamina”. if your fatigue is low when you enter an encounter, you’re going to really struggle to fight!

here’s a somewhat annoying thing about fatigue: running at full speed diminishes it! so when you’re out in the wilderness, you’re going to want to conserve your fatigue by walking. it’s slow, but hopefully bearably so if you picked the steed as your birthsign. and it’s better than dying to a mudcrab because you were too tired to properly swing your weapon.

fortunately, there’s this thing called resting! if you’re out in the wilderness, you can press “t” to rest for as long as you’d like, or “until healed” (until your hp, magicka, and fatigue are completely restored). unfortunately, this close to seyda neen, you can only “wait” - all this does is restore your fatigue. it’s illegal to rest inside of most settlements, or even in their outskirts.

anyways, hopefully you’ve completely dominated that first mudcrab of yours. should go down in one hit, so long as you can connect. another thing to note: you may have noticed when you bought your saber that its damage stats are ranges. for instance, its chop stat (the one you’ll be using with your “always use best attack” enabled) is 5-18. to maximize your damage on the high end of that range, you’ll need to hold down your click for a second or so to wind up the attack. you’ll do a lot more damage this way rather than just mashing left mouse button!

anyways, after you’ve gotten your first kill, proceed along the coast, making sure to head between the rocks just up the way. you’ll find either a rat or a kwama forager (worm thing), and that’s how you know you’re going the right way. it’ll attack on sight, but there’ll be another critter there, a little grey insect looking thing called a “scrib” that thumps its tail on the ground and squeals. it’s not going to attack you when you get close, so don’t attack it. be nice. it’s just a little guy! if you do decide to attack it, though, you might be in for a nasty surprise: it has a paralyzing bite! a scrib can really catch you off guard at this low level. so leave the little guy alone!

across from the scrib, to the left, you’ll find a corpse. if you’ve been talking to the residents of seyda neen (i highly recommend you do) you may have heard that the local tax collector is missing. this is him. take the tax record and 200 gold from him. let’s read the tax record! to read any note or book from your inventory, click and drag it over your character portrait! this is really how you interact with anything in your inventory. note who has the highest unpaid tax to find a motive, but we’ll get back to that later. we’ve got some other stuff to do in the swamp.

proceed northwest, killing any little critters (except scribs!) that get in your way. pretty quick you’ll find yourself with a mountain on your right and the ocean on your left. follow the coast along those mountains. you’re going to find pretty quick a weird looking door on your right. that’s an ancestral tomb door! they all look like that. make a note of where this is, we’re coming back to it. keep progressing along the coast.

eventually you’ll find a little shipwreck. yes, that’s a ship, albeit a local, kinda weird-looking one. just before you get to the ship itself, there’ll be a chest next to a log that’s sticking up out of the water. there’s a silver longsword in there! take it, it’s your new weapon of choice, slightly better than your saber. now let’s explore the ship! get on board and take the trapdoor down to your right. at the end of the interior, next to the next trapdoor down, there’s a crate in the water with moon sugar in it! you may be familiar with skooma, the narcotic? moon sugar is what it’s made from. it’s very valuable, but also very illegal, so we’re going to have to be careful with how we sell it. we’ll get to that eventually.

take the trapdoor further down, and immediately swim up, bc you’re gonna be underwater! at the end of this section of the ship, you’ll find a little chest on the floor with 3 diamonds in it! woohoo! now let’s get out of here, that skeleton’s freaking me out. there’s nothing of note in the cabin section of the ship, so don’t worry about it. let’s go back to that tomb!

samarys ancestral tomb:

okay, right outside the tomb, SAVE! you need to save a LOT in this game if you want to make progress! i recommend having multiple running saves going as well as your quicksave. my most recent playthrough has 5 different saves that i cycle through. it’s a good way to make sure you don’t get stuck in untenable positions! make sure you have your silver longsword equipped and head on in.

once you’re in, open the door right across from you. in the next chamber, you’ll see these little raised things with jars on them. those jars have dead people in them! you don’t really want what’s in those jars, though - you want what’s next to them. always check next to these jars in ancestral tombs for valuables. most of the time it’s just clothes or ingredients, but sometimes, like in the case of the first jar on the right, there’s valuable scrolls! take it, and proceed down the corridor and turn right.

here’s your first challenge! a ghost! this is why we got the silver longsword first, because only silver weapons (or higher quality) or enchanted weapons can actually hit ghosts! this ghost knows a nasty little fire spell that can do quite a bit of damage if you don’t kill him quickly. just keep up your consistent, charged hits until he goes down. across from the entrance to this chamber is another jar-plinth with another scroll, this time an offensive one! take it, it might prove useful. save again!

on the other side of the next door is either a greater challenge or an even greater challenge. sometimes it’s just a skeleton, and sometimes it’s a lesser bonewalker, which can be very dangerous! take him down as quickly as you can, because bonewalkers often know very detrimental curses that can lower your attributes. save again after you kill it!

next, you want to disarm the trap on that urn in the bonewalker room. equip your journeyman’s probe and start clicking on that urn, just like you did with the chest in the census office! once the trap is disarmed, take mentor’s ring! told you we were gonna get that. it’s a very useful ring that increases your intelligence and willpower by 10 points each. go ahead and equip that. there’s a weird named ash in the urn, and a key to the chest next to it, but don’t bother. the chest never has anything valuable in it. don’t forget to reequip your silver longsword after you disarm the trap!

speaking of, here’s another little tip. press f1. this gives you the quick-select menu, where you can assign items or spells to your number keys. i’d put your main weapon (right now the silver longsword) on number 1, then put your most used spells on the next few numbers, in whatever order or fashion you prefer. makes swapping between items and spells much easier.

heading back to seyda neen:

leave the tomb and hug the mountains going east until you hit the road. then follow the road east some more until you see a man fall from the sky. yes, that just happened. he’s dead and free-game, so let’s loot him. take his nice enchanted sword (it’s slightly better than your current weapon, so long as it has a charge), equip his nice conical hat, and either equip his robes and shoes (you can wear robes over your equipped armor in this game! isn’t that so cool) or take them to sell later. take any gold he might have on him, and take those weird “scrolls of icarian flight” he has. do NOT use those scrolls. sell them. you will DIE if you try to use those scrolls. also, take a gander at his journal underneath him, and then take it to sell as well.

alright, from here, follow the road east and south back to seyda neen. let’s head back to arrille’s to sell some of the stuff we got. note that you are now carrying moon sugar, which as i said, is illegal. honest merchants won’t trade with you if you have moon sugar or skooma in your inventory. we’ll find some dishonest merchants later, don’t worry. but for now, you’ll have to simply drop the moon sugar on the floor before you start selling. don’t forget to pick it up when you’re done!

next, remember that guy you noted from the tax record, the one with the highest unpaid tax? we’re going to pay him a visit, ask what happened to the tax collector. i won’t tell you where he is; check the houses around seyda neen until you find the one with his name on the door. before you go in, save, and make sure your fatigue is up.

talk to him. he’ll confess to killing the tax collector, giving you the option of letting him go, or doing justice right then and there. do the justice. he’ll immediately attack you - with his fists. this might not sound scary to you at first. in later games, hand-to-hand combat merely does a little bit of damage to your health. in this game, hand-to-hand hits do damage to FATIGUE. and remember how important fatigue is? it affects everything, from physical combat to your chance at casting spells. so you’re gonna wanna take this guy down before he does too much damage to your fatigue. if your fatigue reaches zero, you get knocked out, falling to the floor. at this stage, hand-to-hand hits actually do damage to your HEALTH. and it’s easy to get trapped in a loop of getting knocked down. so don’t let that happen and kill him quickly. this fight is probably actually harder than the bonewalker, since this guy does a lot of damage to your fatigue with each hit, and you’re draining your own fatigue by swinging at him. but keep up with your consistent charged hits and you should be able to take him down.

be sure to take the ring he’s wearing! it’ll come in handy later. then loot the place - it’s effectively your house now, a decent starter shack. especially important is the book on the floor, which is a skill book increasing your mercantile skill, and sells for a pretty penny. there’s also some ingredients in the various barrels and sacks, if you’re into alchemy.

next, let’s go back to the census office. yes, the place you started at. talk to the old dude who set up your class and birthsign. there’ll be an option to report the murder. do so, and he’ll give you 500 gold. nice!

next, head on to the lighthouse on the coast. you should be able to see it from anywhere in seyda neen. step inside and talk to the lady immediately on your right. ask her about the ring you picked up from the murderer and she’ll give you two pretty high-quality healing potions! nice. now, head upstairs. there’s a very valuable book at the top you can take (the lady downstairs can’t see you now) which increases your unarmored skill. 

now head outside to the top of the lighthouse. stand at the corner facing the rest of the town, and wait until 10pm. if you’ve spent a lot of time resting/waiting, you might have missed your first 10pm, and will have to wait almost a day for the next one. don’t worry about it, you don’t have a time limit. now watch that little torch-wielding gremlin fargoth crawl around for a little bit. he’ll make a few stops along his way, but don’t worry, he can’t see you from up here (even though he does approach and stop in front of the lighthouse at one point). eventually he’ll stop by a tree-stump in a mucky pool - that’s where you need to go. once he walks away from there, head back down the lighthouse and go there. inside the stump you’ll find a bunch of gold, fargoth’s old healing ring, and a nice lockpick. take it all.

now, hrisskar wanted you to return with the money so he could split you a cut. instead, we’re just going to never talk to him again and keep all the money. there’s no repercussions for this at all, unless you’re a completionist who wants to finish every quest completely. but there’s not really a tracker for your completed quests, so it doesn’t really matter.

one last thing to do in seyda neen. we’re going to talk to an altmer (high elf) named eldafire. she can usually be found across the bridge towards the silt strider (the big bug thing you probably saw when you got off the boat), although she tends to roam a bit. ask her for a little advice. she’ll recommend you take out the bandits in the addamasartus cave nearby. let’s do that.

addamasartus cave:

the cave is right across from the silt strider landing, hiding behind a big boulder. save and rest until healed right outside the cave, then head on in. the first enemy shouldn’t be much of a problem to you at this point. she should go down in a few hits, and not get much of a chance to hurt you. take any valuables she might have, especially the addamasartus slave key.

the next enemy, who is beyond the door down to the right, is going to be much more challenging. he’s a mage who will cast a weakness to fire spell at you, and then cast a fire spell at you. you’re a dunmer, so you have some resistance to fire, but this guy can still fuck you up if you’re not careful. try to dodge his spells until he runs out of magicka and is forced to attack you in melee. or be brave and try to take some swings as you dodge. up to you. don’t be surprised if he kills you a time or two - he’s pretty tough. if you need to, go outside (or close to the front door) to rest to heal your wounds after he’s dead. or before he’s dead - no shame in running to fight another day.

okay, now that the hard part is done, we can explore the rest of the cave. go down the stairs to where that mage came from, and turn left when you get to the water. there’ll be another enemy, this one throwing throwing-stars at you. you can try to dodge them - they’re kind of small so it’s difficult to see them - or you can just tank the hits as you rush her down. they don’t do much damage. she’ll go down pretty easy, too. she’ll have a lockpick and probe - take them. if you picked marksman as your ranged skill, you can take the throwing stars as well, although they’re not as effective as a bow would be.

now, loot the room - the crates, sacks, chests, etc. the crates near where the throwing-star lady was should have a total of 8 moon sugar and 2 bottles of skooma in them. the chest will have a random leveled item (that is, an item suited to your level) - you might get lucky with this! in my test run, i got a steel daikatana, which is better than my silver longsword (except against ghosts). don’t forget the crates and barrel over by the water! sometimes the crates can have scrolls, potions, or soul gems in them.

next, go behind the rocks to the left of where the throwing-star lady was. you’ll find a door the slave key will unlock. on the other side of the door you’ll find a little stretch of water. at one point you’ll have to dive under to get to the next chamber - just watch your breath meter! but you shouldn’t have a problem, it’s not a very long dive. at the bottom of the water in the next chamber, you might be able to find a skull to the right. if not, don’t worry about it! but there is a rising force (levitation) potion right next to the skull. don’t drown yourself looking for it though, it’s not that important.

in this chamber, you’ll see a spiral pathway rising out of the water. find where you can clamber onto the pathway and follow it up. there’ll be a rat up there - but nothing you can’t handle. up there you’ll also find some glowing mushrooms. in between them there’s a few pieces of gold, a netch leather pauldron (don’t worry too much about that part - your chitin pauldron is better), and the important part, a “thief ring”! it’ll give you a decent buff when you need it. it’s a little tricky to see against the stone floor of the cave, but try your best to find it.

follow the rest of the passage until you come out near the beginning of the cave. you may have wondered why we went down (to where the mage was) instead of up to where there was a door earlier. we’re going to go up there now. your addamasartus slave key will open the door, and you’ll find two argonian slaves and a khajiit slave. talk to them and offer to let them go free, and unlock their bracers. congrats, you’re an abolitionist now! the game tracks how many slaves you’ve freed for a hidden faction you’ll find eventually. you need to free quite a few to join that faction, so try to free every one you can if you want to join.

now you’re done with addamasartus! feel free to leave. we’re done with seyda neen, now, as well, unless you want to head by arrille’s first to sell off some stuff before you leave. don’t forget to drop your moon sugar and skooma before you barter, and then don’t forget to pick it up before you leave!

onward!:

next stop, balmora, where the imperials wanted you to go. there’s a couple of ways we can get there. the first and easiest is to just hire a silt strider to take you there. those big bug things are basically giant buses, and they have routes all over the western half of the island. but i recommend you walk to balmora, following the directions elone the scout gave you. a big part of this game is exploration, and you’d better get used to it quick. don’t be afraid to get a little sidetracked here and there. explore the occasional cave or mine or tomb on your way - but always save before entering one, and know your limits. the dungeons in this game are largely not leveled to you, and if you enter the wrong one too early, it can really ruin your day. so don’t be afraid to turn around and leave, or load the save you made before entering, if things get too tough.

there’s a little town called pelagiad between seyda neen and balmora. feel free to stop there to restock if you need to. otherwise, just follow the road signs and elone’s directions. you’ll get to balmora in no time. and don’t forget! conserve your fatigue. you don’t want to be running everywhere, run out of fatigue, and then run into even a basic enemy you suddenly can’t handle because you can’t connect any of your hits.

once you get to balmora, go to the south wall cornerclub like you were told in your directions to caius cosades, and ask around to find out where caius lives. i’m not going to hold your hand on quest instructions any more! figure it out on your own. it’s not too hard, so long as you just remember to talk to people about important topics - usually “latest rumors,” “little secret,” “little advice,” and “morrowind lore.” but peruse the other topics, too! you might learn something about the people and place you’re in.

before caius gives you your first official orders, he’ll tell you to join a guild to establish a cover identity. there’s a lot of factions in this game you can join. you’ve got the imperial guilds: the fighter’s guild, the mage’s guild, and the thieves’ guild; the morag tong (essentially the dark brotherhood of this game, but a bit different flavor-wise, as well as in how it works); the religious guilds: the tribunal temple and the imperial cult; the imperial legion; and the great houses: house redoran, house hlaalu, and house telvanni. i won’t go into detail about all of these, but i will mention a few.

factions, and a bit on fast travel:

even if you don’t plan on playing through the questline, i recommend joining the mage’s guild. it gives you a couple of invaluable services: spellmaking, enchanting, and the guild guide. the first is self-explanatory: it lets you use any magic effects you’ve already learned to make custom spells from them. enchanting as a service is what it sounds like - you pay somebody to enchant items for you (you still need to bring a filled soul-gem, though). the guild guide is probably the most important, however. basically, it’s a teleportation service between the mage’s guilds of vvardenfell.

morrowind doesn’t have a fast travel system per se, but there are quicker ways to get around than just walking everywhere. we’ve mentioned the spells that can do this, like almsivi/divine intervention and mark/recall. but you can also take the bus (silt strider) across most of western vvardenfell, or a boat across most of eastern vvardenfell. but those two systems are largely disconnected; the only real way to trade off is to silt strider to vivec, walk (or divine intervention) to ebonheart, then take a boat to sadrith mora or tel branora, or vice versa. 

but the mage’s guild guild guide solves this problem rather nicely! you can teleport from anywhere in the west to sadrith mora in the east much more quickly than the silt strider-boat trade off in vivec and ebonheart. so join the mage’s guild, i’m serious.

the only other factions i’m going to mention are the houses. they’re very important, and you’re going to want to join one. and only one, i might add - once you join one, you’re locked into it. so make your choice wisely. here’s a brief description of each house:

house redoran is a house of noble warriors, whose capital is ald’ruhn, literally inside the hollowed out remains of an ancient giant crab. they are most favored by the local warrior-poet god, vivec, and most of the buoyant armigers (vivec’s personal army) are from redoran.

house hlaalu is a house of sneaky merchants, whose capital is balmora. they’re the most closely affiliated house to the empire, whereas the other two are distrustful of the empire - and therefore distrustful of house hlaalu.

house telvanni is a house of arrogant wizards, whose capital is sadrith mora (literally translates to “mushroom forest”). they live in settlements built around giant fungal wizard towers, and are most distant and distrustful of the new forces (like the empire) in vvardenfell. they’re also most likely to own slaves, although they will accept argonian and khajiit as members all the same.

there is a bit of a disparity when it comes to the rewards you get from quests from these houses. telvanni gifts you with powerful spells and enchanted items; hlaalu gives you gold; redoran gives you, um. “honor.” which doesn’t sell for much in this economy. that might affect your decision here, but really, choose whichever faction appeals to you most. you’ll be able to get your hands on lots of money and powerful artifacts regardless of which house you choose. 

i think that’s about all you really need to know to get started in this game! really, the best piece of advice i can give you is: take your time. take in the atmosphere, the lore, the books, the dialog. absorb yourself into this game and you will have the most amazing experience with it, i think. if you have any questions, let me know!

P.S. i’m going to add things to the end of this as i think of them:

a lot of the time, you’re going to run into people you need information from who won’t give it to you. every npc has a disposition stat, basically how much they like you, and if it’s too low, they won’t discuss certain topics. there’s a few ways to increase their disposition. 1) use the speechcraft skill to admire, intimidate, or taunt the npc. (taunting actually serves a different purpose to the other two, but we’ll get to that shortly.) 2) use a spell, namely the “charm” effect from the illusion school of magic, to temporarily raise their disposition with you. 3) increase your personality attribute, like with telvanni bug musk (always a good item to have around). and 4) bribe the hell out of them. you can bribe in 10 gold, 100 gold, and 1000 gold increments. 100 gold tends to be the most efficient way to bribe, and most people will open up to you after about 200 gold spent this way. money isn’t exactly difficult to come by in this game, especially after the first few levels, so this greasing of the wheels of commerce won’t hurt your wallet too much.

okay, that’s about how to increase a npc’s disposition. how about the scenario where you need (or want) to kill an npc without getting a bounty on your head? simple: either 1) take them out into the wilderness where there are no witnesses (this only works in cases where you can get this person to follow you, such as by using the conjuration school’s “command humanoid” effect), 2) use the “frenzy humanoid” effect from the illusion school to get them to attack you (this shouldn’t trigger a bounty, or for their friends to attack you as well), or 3) “taunting” them to get them to attack you. if your speechcraft is low, this will take many tries, because most of the time your attempt to taunt will fail, and also because it generally takes several successful taunts to get an npc to actually attack you. but you don’t have to worry about using a spell this way, and if you’re patient it’ll work out just the same. 

another thing to note: if you’re on an assignment from the morag tong to kill somebody, you’ll get what’s called a “writ” with their name on it. the morag tong, unlike the dark brotherhood, is a government-sanctioned entity - using the tong to have someone killed is completely legal. this writ is your permission to kill that person. you don’t have to worry about incurring a bounty when you have a writ - you can just straight up merk somebody in broad daylight. watch out, though - sometimes that person’s nearby friends will attack you too. most of the time, though, although they might shout about it, nobody will report the crime. if somebody does, expect to be approached by a guard. in that instance, just present your writ to them, and they’ll be forced to let you go. (if this appeals to you, consider joining the morag tong. although every major city has a morag tong chapterhouse, you can only join the tong from the headquarters in vivec city. i won’t tell you exactly where those headquarters are in vivec - it’s actually fun trying to figure out on your own. just ask around and you’ll figure it out.)

okay, i forgot to mention. once you’ve leveled up your major or minor skills 10 times (repeats of the same skill count as well), you’ll get a notification saying it’s time to level up. to do this, you need to sleep in a bed. simply resting won’t do it. you need some kind of bed. make sure it’s a bed you’re allowed to sleep in! i recommend saving before trying to sleep in a bed. sometimes you’ll find a bed in like a mages guild and assume it’s free game but it’s actually someone in particular’s bed and you get expelled from the guild for trying to sleep in it. not a fun time. 

since you’ll have the goty edition of the game, you’ll have tribunal enabled. that means sometimes when you rest you’ll get attacked by a dark brotherhood assassin. they’re not too tough, though, and they have very useful and very expensive armor and usually a decent weapon. if you want the attacks to stop, talk to a guard about them. but why would you, it’s free money. 

i forgot to mention in the main body of this guide, but there are only a handful of places where you can pawn off your skooma and moonsugar. there are two in balmora: there is ajira, the resident alchemist of the balmora mage’s guild, and ra’virr, a merchant whose store is right next to the mage’s guild. in general, if a merchant is a khajiit, and normally deals in ingredients or potions, they’re likely to buy skooma and moonsugar. 

another thing: you do have a journal! your character automatically records most important information in it about your quests. now, this is an actual journal, with entries in chronological order. so it can be difficult to find relevant information by just looking through it normally. if you have the goty edition (which you should) you have the option to categorize by topic and quest! should be a button on the right. not all quests are marked, but most are. 

[applestorms]

a "quick" little logistical refresher on shinigami eyes & lifespans, mostly for myself but also bc i keep seeing posts talking about this that bother me:

when ryuk first presents light with the offer of shinigami eyes, it comes with an added explanation of the primary (biological?) differences between human & shinigami. specifically, along with the difference in sight distance and ability to see names & lifespans, shinigami use their DN's as a kind of base survival mechanism. while no human weapon/physical attack could ever hurt them, and they have no biological need to eat/sleep/drink/etc, the one thing they do have to do is write down names, at least enough to ensure that their life counter doesn't tick all the way down.

presumably, this is one of the reasons why shinigami can't see each others'/their own lifespans: not just because it is unnecessary, as ryuk says, but also because it is constantly changing as it ticks down, bringing the shinigami closer & closer to their own death until they refresh it by writing down another name. if we could see shinigami lifespans, they would be shifting every second/minute/hour/[insert shinigami-based time measurement here]-- in a way, time is their basic life function.

this means that, by necessity, humans are different. a human lifespan cannot change-- or, even if it does have the ability to adjust under certain circumstances, it still absolutely cannot be influenced by the DN. the DN influencing lifespans goes inherently against the point of using the DN as a way of getting more time, as it would mean that at maximum, all shinigami could only get approximately 40 seconds of life for every kill. they would have to be much more regularly active to keep living under such circumstances, which goes against the whole lazy/slothful shinigami realm thing that's set up early on.

sidenote1: theoretically, you could maybe consider a circumstance where time is a lot more fluid, where human lifespans tick down just the same as shinigami and get transferred/sucked over when their name is written in the DN. but considering the fact that (iirc) it is never depicted like that in any animated/live action mediums, and that the explanation seems more focused around the mathematical approach of, "well if you have 60 years listed and you're 40, the shinigami gets 20 years for writing your name," i'm inclined to disregard this idea or call it mostly non-canonical.

so, following this logic, when light kills with the DN he is almost undoubtedly killing people before the end of their stated/written lifespans. the DN's influence on reality is not something that is predetermined by these written lifespans for the reasons listed above, so if light kills someone at the time they were meant to die, a la BB, it is purely by chance. (e.g. lind l. tailor might've been slated to die that day, but his death could still be considered "unnatural," since it was ultimately caused by the DN.) this tends to be the line of reasoning that people follow when they say that, "everything in DN was ryuk's fault," assuming not just that the DN's influence is unnatural, but that the presence of a shinigami itself is somehow breaking the natural flow of how humanity would've existed on its own when freed from such a presence.

this of course brings up the interesting if somewhat complicated question of free will in the DN universe, though i think we can get a clearer view on this by asking a simpler question first: what is a "natural lifespan" anyway?

intuitively, if we are working under the assumption that humans have at least some semblance of free will, it's easy to assume that a natural lifespan is something that humans can influence. i.e. if you eat healthy, work out regularly, take care of yourself mentally, etc. you can improve your length & quality of life, or just the opposite if you do not. however, this again seems to go against the already established principle of "human lifespans do not change," so i don't think this explanation fully fits.

instead, i actually think there might be a similar logic working here as how diavolo's king crimson stand works in jojo pt. 5-- namely, that there is some fated/destined route that all of humanity is destined to go down, should they be free to go their own way. this implies that at least some/all human action is predetermined to a degree, with deaths being fated/unavoidable if the lifespan counter decrees it, just in the same way that a death cannot in any way be avoided if written in the DN. even if nobody (that we know of in-story, anyway) can see it, there is a destined timeline of human action & existence that will play out naturally should humanity be left alone from any exterior forces, shinigami or otherwise.

the question is only how much the action of shinigami influence this destiny in the long run-- like, does the existence of KIRA in the early 2000s influence the lifespan of children born in japan even after light's death in 2010/2013/2006? presumably, yes, as it would be a huge pain for shinigami if they could no longer trust lifespan counters to accurately depict times of death, and the influence of the DN supposedly only works on those whose names are directly written down. so, perhaps the predetermination only works on a smaller scale, looking only at the destiny of each individual human at the time they are born?? something to consider.

EDIT: actually, scratch that, the answer to that should probably be no-- the entire point is that light's influence is somewhat meaningless in the long run, even if humanity still remembers KIRA distinctly long after light's death, as we see in the c-kira & a-kira post-canon stories. the real question here is whether or not the lifespans of kids born at the time of KIRA's reign are influenced-- which again the answer to which should probably be no, as the DN's influence is limited. guess it just feels weird to think about, that everyone remembers KIRA so distinctly but their lives are still destined the same either way. a bit of weird writing, perhaps? again, this gets into the question of what specifically is being predetermined here-- we see the twin towers still standing post-2001 in story at one point, so were those deaths simply not predetermined in this universe?? big sigh.

sidenote2: even going along with this explanation, i don't think you have to entirely divorce the existence of free will from the DN universe, or at the very least you don't have to believe that every single individual action a human takes or emotion they feel is strictly predestined. this could start getting into more formal philosophical arguments though, and i'm not reading any more hume if i can help it.

ironically, this all kinda goes directly against the idea that light is somehow destined/fated to rid the world of evil by being a teenage serial killer-- if anything, it means that light is specifically going against his fated path by using the DN. you could maybe even make the argument that light is one of the only people in the world acting with true free will, freed from his destined path through the power of an outside force. it's very very very interesting to me in this context that humans using the DN seem to lose their destined lifespans entirely, seemingly breaking from their fated paths entirely purely by gaining such a power, the only lasting remnants of fate's influence being a vague doom hanging over their heads (rip minoru tanaka). i mean-- i guess you could still argue that even that was still fated, that there's like another layer of shinigami-based destiny on top of the base-level human destiny, but this is starting to get stupid so i'm gonna stop talking about fate for now.

point is: please stop saying that beyond could somehow tell that L or naomi or mello were all gonna die soon in the future due to KIRA. he had no way of knowing that-- their lifespans would be written the same regardless of whether or not light got the DN, because the DN by necessity cannot influence the written, predetermined human lifespans. thank you for reading my speech, mic drop.

[xx-cringe-factory-xx]

ANOTHER COMBINED CLASSPECT ANALISIS!!!!!!

Annihilator of Growth

(prince + bard & breath + life) (classpects by @superxstarzz!)

(yooo my brother would be a bard of life)

A bard destroys their aspect or through their aspect for others.

A prince destroys their aspect or through their aspect for themselves,

the breath aspect is all about independence (in a different way then blood, which is more about groups of ppl than a singular person).

Life is about quite literally life and health, lmao.

Okay, so they are 100% a destruction class, which could make this a little easier for me. They'd probably be very helpful in a fight X3

They either they destroy life through breath, or destroy breath through life.

they'd be very difficult to keep track of, but can be very helpful if you can get them to work with others. They might have a bit of an ego (and self deprecating at the same time), and they would likely have a set moral compass, that might be a bit concerning seeing they destroy life and breath. They might think what they're doing is super helpful and good just because it's them who did it, but internally they will prolly be overly aware when they fuck up. They would prolly be an anarchist of some kind, or at least hate the rich; If they're a troll they might not like others higher on the hemospectrum.

before their team's session starts, the Annihilator of Growth will likely be someone most people agree sucks as a person. They will try to impose their ideas of good and bad onto others, which could be annoying when no one asks. During their session they would distance themselves, and be difficult to pinpoint exactly where they are or what they're doing. Annihilators are prolly a lot more likely to screw over their session than any one else.

they might not intend to destroy life or breath, but the destruction definitely is caused by them, which they are very aware of.

They might literally get rid of someone's ability to breath away, which obviously would kill them, or they could destroy someone's agency and freedom by destroying their life, making them sick or at least very weak, which makes it so others have to pick up the ill one's slack.

They're powers would consist of controlling wind, causing illnesses, floating, and maybe some kind of weird overcomplicated version of mind control(?)

they're strife specibus would consist of medium, to larger weapons that require a lot of precision, like swords, clubs, hammers, axes, and other things like that.

[radiation]

Graphic tee ideology (WIP):

Always oversize + Slim fit sucks. Shirt should ideally hang off body not conform to it. Minimal areas of bunching. Tight plain tee shirts can look good but the point of graphic tee shirts is not to flatter the body but to create an interesting composition using a graphic. Distorting the graphic too much kills this

Stiff fabric > stretchy fabric

Opaque fabric > sheer fabric

Extremely important that collars are sturdy so they do not stretch in the wash

Graphic elements should almost always be on the large side

Large, centered graphic elements should almost always take up over half of the width of the shirt

Small design on the breast / big centered design on the back can look good but be extremely careful. Ideally no element should be able to be fully covered by long hair - pay close attention to the size and layout of everything

Nothing should be “medium”. Text should be either thick or thin (unless it’s a subtitle - that’s fine). Graphic should be either big or on the small side.

Focus not on the mere idea of a graphic but rather the composition and distance read. It doesn’t matter how much you like the band or character or college the shirt reps, if you cross your eyes to blur your vision and the t shirt looks unappealing then it’s not a winner

Heather texture almost always looks godawful. Most noisy texture on the shirt material looks bad. Shirt material often looks best as 1 completely solid block of color. Tie-dye is an exception to this

NO pre-distressed designs. Fake chipping peeling fading etc looks cheap and disguises bad print quality

Different colored borders around sleeves and collars can look great but these kind of sleeves in particular should never be form-fitting, always hang

Will keep thinking about this