#meanwhile i was showing somebody who is not supposed to be taking photos how to use this advanced and professional camera

[beaversatemygrandma]

Still just sitting here wondering how i ended up finding a job that i enjoy???

Like around cool large reptiles? Taking photos? I mean, of people, and rarely squirrels much to everybody's dismay. But that?? Good coworkers? GOOD MANAGERS???

Where the hell am i and why is it good? Sure, the pay could be higher and god knows we need an anti fatigue mat or two in that office. But it's not bad at all. Just some pros and cons. Sacrifice some things for an actually pleasant environment.

[ashthemadwriter-archived]

What if I...

—You make a tempting, unexpected offer; how are they going to react?

Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs

Pairings: Dazai, Chuuya, Nikolai, Fyodor, Sigma, Jouno X Fem!Reader

Warnings: Suggestive content, mentions of giving blowjobs (whether it'll happen or not is up to you lol), unstablished relationship (you're just friends, but are you..?), rushed writing

Genre: Humor

Format: Drabble

Word Count: 1.6K

↳Osamu Dazai"

Listen y/n..." Dazai cooes at you. "I'm a little bit busy with... uh, work; so I don't think I'll be able to accompany you on this mission"

Shaking your head to the side with frustration, you bend a little on the desk, gazing into his Hazel eyes to show your desperation "Oh c'mon Dazai! You're not seriously gonna make me go to this tiresome mission by myself?! They're all politicians! It's gonna be boring as hell!"

The pile of paperwork on his desk are making you question your eyesight, but you know Dazai better than that. He probably saw it coming so he placed them there on purpose to prove his point.

...Not that it could exactly be called a "point".

"Listen..." Your voice is so low that only Dazai can hear it. "There must be some way for me to change your mind"

His expression doesn't change one bit, still looking through the documents for nothing, pretending to be occupied. "Sorry to burst your bubbles, but I really can't—"

"What if I suck your dick?"

Eyes shooting you a shocked gaze and hands staying still, it seems like he's completely lost interest in the paperwork. He's looking through your soul and the moment his lips start moving, you know you've won the battle.

"For... for real?" "Yes, for real"

The surprised face is all gone and instead, there's a totally new face now; a smug face of a man who's gonna team up with you for the mission and get a little prize in the end.

"So when do we leave?"

↳Chuuya Nakahara

"Listen Chuuya, with great looks comes great responsibility. There's a reason why you're this hot!"

The red-haired man looked away as an attempt to hide his flustered face, his voice still gravely. "Stop it y/n. I'm not gonna be your model for the photoshoot"

"Why not? You're the perfect choice!" "The answer's no! Get over it"

"Hmph! You're no fun" You crossed your arms and pouted as you leaned to the chair. You couldn't make heads or tails of it. Why was he so against being your model? You were just gonna take a few photos of him wearing casual clothes and maybe some light makeup. It was for your photography class and you were supposed to take a pic of somebody under the rays of sunset. With Chuuya's red hair and blue eyes, it would be a breath taking pic. He just looked so pretty under the sun.

As Chuuya took the bottle to sip from it, you found yourself desperate enough to give it one last shot.

"What if I suck your dick as a payment?"

And then the explosion happened. Chuuya's hand snapped, the bottle fell on the floor and drops of wine literally squirted out of his mouth. He was coughing so strongly that you rushed over and started hitting him in the back like he was some kind of ketchup bottle. His face was crimson red, but whether it was from choking or embarrassment, you couldn't really tell.

When he finally came down and caught his breath, he placed his hand on his chest and looked at you with eyes the same size as a baseball, meanwhile you looked at him miserably with the word "sorry" written all over your face.

"So... is that a yes?" "NO!"

Well, at least you nearly killed him.

↳Jouno Saigiku

"Ok I don't know why you're refusing. I'm just giving you the opportunity to make up for your mean attitude by doing something nice! You know, to go to heaven, like me and other nice people, Teccho for example"

Jouno was still expressionless. He merely sipped his cup of coffee and placed his hat on the table. "I appreciate the offer, but after a lifetime we definitely need a break from each other"

"Ugh you jerk! C'mon it's a piece of cake for you! You've arrested plenty of people before! You're smart, you're strong and I came to you for help which shows that I'm really desperate!"

Your relationship with Jouno was... questionable. He teased you, had a tendency to piss you off all the time, but somehow you were friends. The weirdest type of friendship that had ever existed, probably.

"I can see that. See I do wanna help you out, but I just love seeing the new you"

Shaking your head to the side, you leaned back to the couch. A hard case was given to you and you really didn't want to blow it up, but you needed help, and everyone else were busy. Except for your horrible friend here.

"Jouno, Jouno, Please..." You took his left, gloved hand. "I need you! I'll do anything in return! I'll team up with you and insult Teccho for a whole year! I'll write every one of your reports! I'll even suck your d—"

Jouno didn't hear your voice anymore. In fact, the only thing heard in the room was pure silence, and of course your heartbeat.

You were shocked.

He got his hand out of your grasp, placing it next to your head. His other hand found its way to your lips, softly caressing them. Meanwhile you didn't say a word, just stared at his handsome face and swallowed your saliva.

"Hypothetically, if I help you out, how far would you go to make it up to me?"

Forget about your friendship. You weren't that close anyway.

↳Fyodor Dostoevsky

"I'm going to go to my parents' with my boyfriend tonight"

"I thought you didn't have a boyfriend, dear" Fyodor tilted his head to the side to gaze at you.

"I don't! That's where you come in!"

Nikolai exchanged a look between your nervous expression and Fyodor's smile, and pouted. "Hey! Why didn't you ask me instead?"

"Yeah yeah, if I ever wanted to give them a heart attack you'd be the first person I'll go to" You sighed and looked back at Fyodor. "So? Would you please help me out?"

Fyodor was sitting next to you on a chair. He tucked a strand of hair behind his ear. "Ah... I'm not sure about that. Wouldn't it make our relationship awkward?"

"No! No not at all!" Your voice was rushed and shaky. "You see you're the perfect choice for this"

"Hmph!"

"Shut up Nikolai. I mean, you're tall, you know how to talk to people— in a satisfying way, ah, you know what I mean, you're handsome, you have very pretty hair, you have the most beautiful violet eyes I can stare at until forever..."

His brattish smirk made you shut up and give a few embarrassed coughs. Your flushed cheeks weren't exactly helping you out at the moment.

"Eh... So you're the best in many ways... Now, would you please help me out?"

Fyodor gave Nikolai-who was also smirking- a meaningful look, and his smirk got broader. "I will think about it"

"What's there to think about? You get to have a free dinner and also have a great time! My dad has the same taste in books as you! I'll even suck your dick at the end!"

You suddenly shut up and stared at the two men with eyes the same size as a racket ball. Now there was also two pare of knitted eyebrows along with the smirks. Nikolai's winking and muttering "Yeah baby" didn't help you loosen up at all.

Fyodor leaned closer until the phrase "personal space" lost its meaning, staring at you. His pretty eyes were sparkling, making it harder to steal your gaze from them. His voice was as gentle as the sea breeze, the perfect melody to caress your ears.

"So... I'll get to date the most beautiful girl in the world, spend a whole night with her and then get something afterwards?"

You were so drowned in your thoughts that you couldn't utter a single word. This moment was magical, making you wonder if he were going to seal your lips with his, totally forgetting about Nikolai's presence.

...Until he started talking.

"Do you guys want me to leave the room? Cause there's no way I'm doing that"

↳Nikolai Gogol

"...Which is why clowns are so fragile and have strong emotions!"

You shook your head with disappointment. "Yeah yeah, get it. But that doesn't answer my question"

"What was your question anyway?"

Ugh.

"Would you please babysit my cousins with me?"

"Hahaha! I remember now!" His face brightened with joy. "Well, no"

You leaned closer to him miserably. "Oh c'mon Kolya!"

"Sorry dove, I just don't get along with children. Not a fan"

"But they're triplets Kolya! I can't handle them on my own!" At this point you were literally begging. "Pretty please?"

"Triplets? Ha! Another reason for me to say no"

Well, that was it. You were going to be alone with your naughty cousins for four hours and then hand a burned house and probably only one of the boys back to your aunt because you lost the other two.

"Unless..."

Ah! There's still some hope left.

"You offer me something in return?"

Nikolai's face was dangerously close to yours. His smile was bright, but his intention didn't seem to be. Although that didn't scare you. It only made your body numb with excitement and through your clouded mind, you somehow put two and two together and blurted something out.

"Eh... What if.. What if I suck your di— Woah Nikolai what are you doing?"

A chuckle left his mouth as if something simple had happened, but this wasn't simple. He had just lifted you up and was carrying you bridal style to your bedroom.

"You took the hint all by yourself. How about that, my naughty dove?"

"K— Kolya! Where are you taking me?"

Your red cheeks only made his smile broader. "We're gonna get your clothes changed, go to your aunt's aweful house, babysit your horrible cousins, and then get ready for a night of fun"

↳Sigma

"So... How's the best manager in the world?"

Sigma's stare was still pointed at the documents. "I'm not planning a birthday party for your friend y/n"

"What are you talking about?" You smiled cunningly, lightly caressing his arm from the other side of the desk. "Can't I just compliment my incredible friend? Who happens to be an expert in planning and managing stuff?"

When you two first met, he used to get flustered by your flattering comments, but now Sigma's eyebrows only jumped in surprise. "You... can, but it won't change my mind"

"Pretty please?" Dropping the act, you got up from your seat and stood next to him, putting both of your hands on his shoulders. "I really need your help. I don't have a clue about this and you're the only one I know"

"I'm sorry y/n, but I'm caught up with work. You know that the casino is very busy this time of year, there's nothing I can do"

You sighed and sat on the chair again, desperately thinking about a way to convince him. What would make men do women a favor...

"What if I suck you dick?"

Sigma was still staring at the documents, which made you wonder if he had heard you, but his eyes were not the same. They were widened. He slowly lifted his head and looked at you like he was about to chop off his hand and stick it down his ass, and that made you finally realize it.

"Oh I forgot that you're three years old! I mean you haven't even hit puberty yet. Oops. My bad"

Yeah, Sigma needed new friends.

All rights reserved © 2023 AshTheMadWriter. Please do not copy, repost, translate, or modify my works on any platform.

Tag List:

@pussydrunkfyodor @h8kolya @exhausted-doll @rosasensibles @nekokinax @paperllama @the-foreigner @arsonklee @fayenfim @c4xcocoa @asqmi @blueberry-writer @ryokuryuu @ayladove @sinfullysophiastrange @sugarcherryemo @whossuzy @sigmazcasino @linn-a-a @uottani @ilovechuuyaa @ezraiix @aeshiiteiru @dreamcastgirl99 @bestiewhat

Want to be added to my bsd tag list?

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

If I Fell For You (Part 10) - Take Care

Summary: The reader gets to meet Danneel’s parents in a somewhat unorthodox way but receives a warm welcome to her surprise. Meanwhile, a minor medical scare makes Jensen anxious that he takes too much and doesn’t give enough to the reader...

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x nanny!reader

Square: Playing With Their Hair

Word Count: 4,800ish

Warnings: language, minor frightening situation, minor medical situation, anxiety

A/N: Please enjoy! Also written for @supernatural-jackles​​ Tell Me A Story Bingo...

________

One Week Later

“Y/N, can we get orange?” asked Arrow from where she sat in the shopping cart. She pointed at the tubes of frosting and you took one off, handing it to her as you went back to searching for a box of red velvet mix. 

“Come on,” you sighed, squatting down. You saw one shoved in the back and you bent down, reaching back to get it. You huffed when you pulled it back, the expiration date still plenty good. “Score. Okay Arrow what other color…”

She wasn’t in the cart anymore as you stood, her bright pink shirt and shorts nowhere in sight. 

“Arrow!” you shouted, people from the farther end of the aisle turning to look at you. You breathed hard and spun around, exiting the aisle and looking at the checkouts. “Arrow!”

“Mam,” said a man in a white dress shirt and slacks, walking over with a headset on.

“I had a little girl with me and she’s missing and she was in the cart and I would have heard her climb out,” you said, walking quickly, the man following with you as you checked down aisles. “Arrow!”

You heard the guy talk into his headset when you caught pink and a guy near the front of the store. She spun around and you ran over, the manager not too far behind you. You didn’t say a word when you kicked the back of the guys knee and grabbed Arrow, picking her up.

“What’d I do?” he said, Arrow turning away. He looked more angry than you were expecting and you swallowed, the manager urging you back. “She’s the one that took my granddaughter!”

“She’s not your fucking granddaughter, pervert. I’m her nanny and soon to be step-mom so you can back the fuck off.”

“Step fucking what?” he said, his face going blank. 

“Grandpa I told you Y/N’s my friend,” said Arrow. You blinked and stared at the man.

“Prove it,” you said. The man angrily pulled out his wallet and ripped out a picture, turning it around. It was a large group photo but you could clearly see Jensen and the kids in it along with… “You’re her father. Danneel.”

“Who the fuck are you,” he said. You took out your phone and went to your pictures, showing him one of your backyard bonfire from the weekend before. 

“Is there a problem?” asked the manager. You shook your head and he rolled his eyes and left.

“Sir, I’m so sorry,” you said. He nodded and glanced down. 

“Well, I can’t blame you. I understand the feeling,” he said. 

“Can we...talk?” you asked.

“I think that’d be best before somebody else gets their ass kicked.”

Fifteen minutes later you had your bag of baking supplies in your trunk, Arrow was playing on the jungle gym and you were sat at a picnic table with Danneel’s parents.

“You guys came down early for JJ’s birthday, huh,” you said.

“We had to come down this weekend instead. Something came up last minute next week,” said her mom. You nodded and took a deep breath. 

“I am so sorry. That is absolutely not how Jensen and I wanted to tell you both.”

“I’m old but I’m tough. I’ll survive,” said her father. You looked over to where Arrow was playing, gnawing on your bottom lip. “You said you were the nanny and soon to be step mom. Mind unraveling that for us?”

“I uh, I started working for Jensen in January as a nanny to help with the kids. The relationship part came a few weeks later. We’ve been engaged very briefly. Don’t even have a ring or anything yet,” you said, shaking your head. “Please don’t be mad at him. It’s taken him so long to stop feeling guilty for having feelings for me. Please don’t be upset with him. I don’t...I’m not trying to replace anyone or anything. I didn’t want to like him. But I did and I love him and he deserves to be happy again.”

They looked at one another and back at you.

“Good,” they both said. 

“Excuse me?”

“We think he deserves to be happy too. He was in such a bad place after the accident,” she said. “He’s sounded like himself again recently.”

“Plus if you’re willing to kick my ass for thinking I took Arrow, that gets you some brownie points,” he said with a smile. You nodded and looked down at the table, swallowing. “Not what you were expecting?”

“Your daughter’s husband is engaged to a younger woman. I wouldn’t blame you at all for whatever you might think,” you said.

“He’s got a lot of time left,” he said. “He doesn’t have to be miserable for it. We don’t want that for him. It’s not what she’d want. He’s doing exactly what she’d want from him and that’s all we can ask of him. Well and maybe stick around the country for a bit so we can see the kids some more.”

“Yeah, no plans to be anywhere but home right now,” you said. You looked over at Arrow and watched her jump off a high platform. She fell down to her knees but got up and brushed them off before she was running again.

“She’d like you,” you heard, your attention going back to the two of them. She was staring at you and you smiled.

“You don’t know a thing about me mam.”

“I think we know the important parts,” she said. You nodded and glanced down. “What do Jensen’s parents think of all this?”

“They know he’s dating but that’s it. I’m supposed to meet them next week,” you said.

“We’ll keep our lips sealed for the time being then,” she said. “What about your folks? What do they think of Jensen and the kids?”

“The kids probably haven’t met either parent yet, right?” he said. 

“It’s kinda complicated...I was adopted. My mom died a long time ago. I don’t have a dad or family really,” you said. You pursed your lips and picked at the corner of the table with your fingernail, the air heavy. 

“Well we approve of him,” he said. “He’s a good kid.”

“I know. He’s very special,” you said. “I just wish something so horrible didn’t have to happen to him and your daughter in order to meet him.”

“We can’t change that fact,” she said. “She’d want you to take care of him, keep an eye on him. Oh and remind him to take a break and slow down every once in a while. He always gets so caught up in work and being on the go. She had to calm him down sometimes.”

“I have noticed that trend,” you said. “I hope you don’t feel like he’s going to forget-”

“No we don’t worry about that. If we learned anything from this it’s just that you have to live while you have the chance,” he said as Arrow ran over.

“Y/N, I’m hungry,” she said. 

“Alright, munchkin. Why don’t we head home and maybe your grandma and grandpa will have lunch with us?” you asked.

“We’d love to,” they said. “We’ll meet you two there.”

“That went shockingly well,” said Jensen late that night when you were having an extra slice of JJ’s early birthday cake. “Those guys loved you.”

“I think we both got a little too worried over the parents situation. Dee’s parents were great, especially considering I nearly broke his knee. I’m really excited to meet yours next weekend.”

“It’s not too long of a drive up there. I haven’t been home in a long time. I’m looking forward to it too,” he said, a big smile on his face. “I’m really glad they liked you.”

“What’s not to love?” you said, Jensen smirking around his piece of cake. “You’re so hard on yourself. I’m really happy they like me too but even if they didn’t, there’s no problem there. You’re allowed to live your life. Dee wants you to keep living it.”

“I still wonder if she was just like ‘this boy is driving me nuts again, he needs a girl,’ and somehow shoved you into my life,” he said.

“Maybe. I mean, it was good timing that I was looking for a new job the same time you were looking for a nanny.”

“Did you ever report that last guy as an inappropriate employer?” he asked.

“I tell the agency but nothing criminal no. I mostly feel sorry for the families. Nannies are stability in the kids lives and leaving them isn’t easy. Unless they’re little shitheads but even then I don’t blame them, it’s the parents that turned them into it,” you said. 

“What’d you think of those three, when you met ‘em I mean,” he said.

“They’re all a little shy like you but they open up if they like you. They’re pretty damn funny. They got wit and sarcasm, even if they don’t know it yet. They’re kind and intelligent and they look to you in how to act like most kids. I knew they were good kids from the start.”

“You’re gonna be a great mom,” he said. You smiled and watched him eat a piece of cake, Jensen tilting his head. “You know they have called you mom before. All three of them. Accidentally but still.”

“Being a nanny has some of the roles of a parent but there’s still a difference,” you said.

“Yeah but you’ve never just been the nanny,” he said, scraping up some frosting with his fork. “Speaking of your sudden thrust into motherhood, the whole kids thing...how many of your own were you thinking of?”

“I don’t know. I don’t need to make a baby to love it. I was adopted and my mom loved me so much. I mean there’s already three of ‘em to chase after.”

“I’d like to have a baby with you. Someday,” he said. You dabbed your finger across some frosting on the plate and sucked on it, staring at him. “I know you do. Y/N there’s no more secrets. There’s never gonna be a secret between us ever again. Sometimes you get nervous but we have to talk about these things and everything. The big choices and the little ones we make together.”

“Honestly? I don’t want you to think I’ll love them less than a kid I make. I won’t. I will treat them all the same but I don’t know how to prove that to you.”

“You told me the day I hired you that I needed to hire someone I could trust, that trust was going to be so important. Y/N, I’ve never doubted your feelings for them. Shit, I’m pretty damn sure you were in love with them before me. And I get it because they aren’t scary. They can’t hurt you like the adults can. We wouldn’t be having this conversation if I had a shred of doubt.”

“I gotta think about kids more I guess. How many, when. I don’t know that right now.”

“We’ll figure out all that when we’re ready. Just let me know and we’ll come back to this conversation,” he said, wrapping an arm around your waist. “You know...hearing about what you did at the store...that’s kinda super attractive you know.”

“Uh what?” you said, Jensen pulling you into his lap.

“You, going protective badass...that’s very, very hot you see,” he said. 

“You’re such a guy,” you said while he picked up the last piece of cake on his fork. 

“Well we-” he said as you leaned forward and wrapped your lips around the dessert, pulling back with a smile. “Oh you shouldn’t have done that.”

“What are you gonna do about it?” you smirked. He narrowed his eyes and set his fork down before he was standing and flipped you over his shoulder. “Jensen! Put me down!”

“Do the crime, do the time!” he said, walking over to the stairs. “Hm...what to do with you...ah I know…”

“You know…” you said before he flipped you down onto the couch and plopped down on top of you, catching most of his weight on his hands on either side of you. “Troublemaker.”

“You love it,” he said. He leaned down and kissed you, your hands wandering to his hair, holding him close. You grinned and wrapped your legs around his waist, Jensen kissing you sloppy and cheeky and like a teenage boy making out for the first time. 

“Dad,” said JJ, rushing down the stairs. He dropped this forehead to yours and sighed.

“What is it?” he asked. He sat up and you both looked at her, spotting the pale tint of her skin. “Feel okay?”

“Jensen call an ambulance, now,” you said, pushing him off and going over to her. He sat up and you kneeled down next to her, her lips slightly blue. You put a hand on her chest and felt the labored breathing. “Did you eat something new tonight? Or did a bug bite you?”

“I stepped on a prickly in the bathroom a minute ago,” she said.

“Jesus,” said Jensen as he rushed into the kitchen. “She got stung by a scorpion.”

He grabbed a bottle from the cabinet and started unscrewing it.

“Jensen go see what the scorpion is and get rid of it before the twins find it,” you said. He left the bottle with you and shoved the phone against your ear. “Hi, sorry how much of the anti-venom do I give her?”

“There should be a child dosage on the bottle, half the cap,” the person on the other end said. You unscrewed the lid and poured some out, having her swallow it down. She whined and you didn’t blame her based on the smell. “An ambulance will be there shortly.”

“Thank you,” you said, spotting Jensen at the top of the stairs. He was holding his wrist and had a slightly smushed object in one of the clear plastic cups from the kids bathroom. “We have the scorpion.”

“EMT’s should be able to identify it,” she said, Jensen walking down slowly. He took a seat on the bottom step and shook his head. 

“Jensen?” you said, his hand reaching for the bottle. You moved his hand from his wrist and saw two dots there. “Shit. My fiance was stung too.”

“There’s a nest in the bathroom vanity,” he said, pouring himself a dose and knocking it back. “I blocked off the door but get the twins out of there, please.”

“JJ,” you said as you saw her color get better while Jensen was getting paler. You took your phone out of your pocket and dialed, handing it to her. “Tell Uncle Jared to come over right now.”

Five minutes later Jared was there, JJ and Jensen sat in the back of an ambulance, Jensen getting a shot of something in the leg.

“We’re taking them to West County,” said a paramedic.

“I’ll see you guys soon,” you said, JJ staring worriedly at Jensen who has holding his wrist again. Jared looked around as they took off and you sighed. “Hey.”

“JJ said she and Jay got stung by a scorpion?” he asked.

“She got one as far as they can tell. Jensen got three. There’s a nest in the bathroom cupboard,” you said.

“Idiot,” mumbled Jared. You raised and eyebrow and he shook his head. “He forgot to get the pest spray done this year I bet. Dee always handled that kind of stuff. They’ve had a scorpion problem before when they first moved in.”

“Oh.”

“I’m gonna take the twins and stay the night. I’ll call and get the spray guys in first thing in the morning. You go take care of those two,” he said. You nodded and he grabbed your arm when you headed for your car. “Wait five minutes to calm down.”

“Jared I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not. You just don’t know it. Go inside, get your purse, Jensen’s wallet, take a beat, okay?”

“Okay,” you said. “Make sure-”

“I got it. Go on,” he said. “Make sure he’s not freaking out. Last time he was at a hospital it wasn’t good.”

“Right. Okay. Call me if you need something. And stay away from the kids bathroom.”

“Y/N. I know. It’ll be alright, I promise.”

One Hour Later

“Is dad okay?” asked JJ from where she sat in your lap. Jensen peeled an eye open and smiled. 

“I’m okay. Sleepy is all. We’ll be home in a few hours,” he said. His wrist was bandaged and he had an IV in his arm but he’d taken the anti-venom soon enough that they had enough time to get the proper medication in both him and JJ. She was already discharged but you didn’t want to leave Jensen by himself.

“Mr. Ackles,” said a doctor when she walked in the room. “Your bloodwork came back and everything looks good.”

“Awesome,” he said, sitting up in bed. “Can I get out of here?”

“You got about fifteen minutes left on that IV drip but I’ll let the nurse know to start the paperwork. I want you to take it easy tomorrow. Nothing strenuous.”

“I got it,” he said with a nod. “Nothing strenuous.”

“Jensen,” you said around noon the next day, catching him unloading some wood from the back of his truck. “What are you doing?”

“I was gonna work on those shelves for the kid’s playroom,” he said. You crossed your arms and he threw his head back. “I feel fine. The nest got cleared out and the house got sprayed. I wanna work on this.”

“You have all the time in the world to do it. Work on it tomorrow,” you said, picking up the wood plank. He tried to take it out of your hands and you growled. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled.

“Please do what the doctor said and rest today,” you said. He bit his lip and you moved the pieces of wood into the garage, Jensen leaning back against the side of the truck when you shut the trunk. “You’re scared, aren’t you.”

He nodded and glanced at his wrapped up wrist, then down to the ground.

“Hospitals freak me out now,” he said. “I don’t like bugs. My body hurt and knowing I forgot to do something so simple put them in danger sucks. Knowing if she hadn’t come downstairs it might have been real bad sucks. If you hadn’t noticed I don’t know if I would have and it scares me not knowing.”

“Close your eyes for me,” you said. He shut them and took a deep breath, letting you take his hand and walk around to the back of the house. You spun him around a few times stopping him so he was facing the pool about twenty feet away. “Know where you are?”

“Somewhere in the middle of the backyard,” he said. “What are you doing?”

“You said not knowing scared you. Lots of times you don’t know. It’s kinda just how life works,” you said, dropping his hand and moving a few feet away. “Take a big step forward.”

“Y/N, I don’t like this,” he said, fidgeting his hand along the bottom of his shirt. 

“I know you don’t. But would I hurt you?”

“No,” he said. 

“So listen to me. Big step forward.” He took a step and you looked around. “Jump backwards.”

“What?”

“Jump backwards.” He frowned and took a small bunny hop back. “Again.”

“I feel ridiculous.”

“Says the guy who plays pretend for a professional career. Now hop back and then step to the right,” you said. He groaned and did as asked. “Jog forward until I say stop.”

“Are you trying to kill me out here cause I feel like I’m about to break my neck slipping in the pool.”

“I’m trying to get your anxiety out in a non-life threatening way, okay?”

“By having me jump around the backyard like an idiot.”

“By having you get comfortable with the fact that most of life is spent not knowing and you can’t change that fact. You can’t see it all coming.”

He threw his head back but kept his eyes shut. He stared to run towards you and you wrapped your arms around him when he got there, Jensen peeling them open slowly.

“See? I wasn’t gonna let anything bad happen,” you said. He nodded and rested his forehead on your shoulder, pulling you into a squeezing hug. “You okay?”

“I’m sorry for being short and not doing what the doctor asked,” he said.

“Hey, it’s alright. I got scared too last night. Everything is fixed now so no need to worry over it. Why don’t you take a nap and maybe we have a real quiet lazy day while Dee’s parents got the kids for the day,” you said. “Sound fun?”

“Okay,” he said. “I’ll take quiet today.”

Three hours later Jensen was curled up with a blanket, his head resting in your lap as you watched a movie together. You played with his hair, Jensen turning into the touch every so often. 

“I know you’re worried about me,” he said. He turned and faced up at you, your fingers swirling in his strands. “I know I’m kinda clingy today which I’m normally not.”

“You can cling all you want, honey,” you said, stroking his cheek with your thumb. “I wish life would give you a break for a second. No work, no badness. Just some peace and quiet for you.”

“My parents lived here after the accident. For a few months. They were here, Jared and Gen were over every day, my siblings would stop down every week. The first few months I understood. I had an injury I had to recover from. But I felt like a child those few months once I recovered. Everyone taking care of the kids, of me. I was barely a father to them. Playtime. A story at bed. Someone else made most of their meals, did everything for them.”

“You’re a father but you’re still someone’s child,” you said. He blinked and you shrugged. “You were hurt, possibly the worst out of anyone. I know taking care of everyone else is your default but people get to take care of you too. I get to take care of you.”

“I feel like all I do is get taken care of by you,” he said. “I never give it back.”

“You’ve given me a family again. You take care of me every single day.”

“I never see you getting upset. It’s always me. I’m always the fuck up,” he said. You slumped down and took a deep breath. 

“I get upset Jensen. I got upset that very first time we fought, that night with the ice cream. I got upset when you got jealous of that nanny in Canada and we saw my father the first time. I got upset telling you the truth of it all because you of all people don’t need problems like that dumped at your feet. I got upset when we saw him again because I was scared and I was scared he might hurt you too. I got upset when we fought when you got home and I got upset when you proposed because you were so scared and I get upset Jensen. I get upset when you’re hurt. I get upset when I hurt. But I don’t have all those safety nets under me that you do, remember? I just got a couple right now and you’re my last resort. I’ve been my own support system for so long that I can’t undo that all overnight. I know it’s been months but the fact I even let you see me cry, the fact I can even talk about this stuff with you and know all you’re thinking about is how to make me feel better...I still need to heal too. You’ve done so much already. I’m gonna have my moments where this is switched, believe me. But today’s not my turn for that, it’s yours.”

“I love you,” he said, staring up with the softest green eyes you’d ever seen on him yet. “Even more than five minutes ago if that’s possible.”

“I love you,” you said, bending down and kissing him. “You’re the expert on the falling in love stuff though so I’ll leave that up to you.”

“It’s very...it’s what you think it is and it’s not at all what you think. There’s falling and nerves and then calm and then falling and calm and you spend the rest of your life doing that. It’s not magic and it takes work to keep it alive sometimes but all you gotta do is talk. Just talk and it always seems to work out for me,” he said.

“Can I tell you a secret?” you asked. He nodded and smiled as you went back to playing with his hair.

“You know I really like when you do that,” he said.

“I know you do. It relaxes you,” you said.

“Makes me feel safe too,” he said. “But what’s your secret cause eventually I’m gonna want to know them all.”

“I was very attracted to you when we met. But that kinda freaked me out a bit. I found myself liking you a lot that first day I was here. You got me a birthday cake. I realized how kind you are that night. It wasn’t for anyone’s benefit other than my own. I had a crush on you, even though I knew it wouldn’t go anywhere.”

“I had a crush on you from when you made me a cup of coffee. You’re so good and kind yourself,” he said. He reached up and cupped your cheek. “I’m really happy you had your mom eventually. I would have liked to have met her.”

“Maybe she and Dee are hanging out wherever they are.”

“I hope so. She won’t mind sharing me with you,” he said.

“You honestly think so?” 

“You gonna mind sharing me with her?” he asked.

“I’ve always shared you. Just hope that wouldn’t bother her.”

“I used to think maybe it would but no, she wants me to be happy and that’s you so you got all eternity to get to know each other eventually if you think about it.”

“Well when you put it that way we got nothing to worry about,” you said.

“Oh don’t worry about that. I think your mom was right. I get to have two people is all, kinda like she did,” he said. 

“She would have liked you. Would have said you’re a little old for me but she would have liked you.”

“Wasn’t she older than Ray?” he asked.

“Yeah. She was. She was only fifty,” you said.

“You grew up too fast,” he said quietly.

“Maybe. But it got me here and I don’t think I would have done anything different. I wouldn’t want to screw that up. Well I’d do one thing different.”

“What?”

“Drop by this house, have a conversation with a certain someone.”

“Say hypothetically you had that ability, you’d really do that knowing what you’re giving up?”

“I’d give her back to you right this second if I could.”

“I appreciate that, really,” he said. He let his hand fall down and reach around your back, curling around your waist. “But she’s not more important than you are. I miss her. Everyday. But I lose one of you either way in that scenario. And I can’t choose. I’ll never be able to. If she were here and you weren’t, I’d still be just like this. It’d still hurt.”

“Make me a promise. I keel over early, you try again. Try for both of us.”

“I will if you will,” he said. He held up his pinky finger and you grabbed it with yours. “But he can’t be hotter than me.”

“Equally as hot?”

“Slightly less hot but that’s my final offer,” he said. 

“Eh, fine,” you said. “You’ve worn me down.”

“Always words I want to hear,” he chuckled. You slid further down the couch until you were practically laying back, your arms wrapping around him. He got up and lay down with you on the wrap around side of the couch, pulling you into his chest. “Can I take you to dinner tonight? Just us.”

“Yeah. I’d like that.”

“Okay, honey,” he said, kissing your forehead. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Just thanks. For what you said. What you did earlier, just being with me,” he said.

“Lucky for you I like being with you a whole lot,” you said.

“Very lucky for me,” he said. “Very lucky indeed.”

______

A/N: Read Part 11 here!

[fellulahh]

Diavolo and MC visit a theme park (tiny NSFW)

With big grins on their faces, MC and Diavolo descended down the steps of their latest ride with Lucifer following close behind. The three of them were visiting the human realm and after the Prince asked MC what would make a fun day out, she insisted that they went to a theme park.

Immediately Diavolo jumped at the idea whereas Lucifer...not so much. Nevertheless, he wasn’t about to try and interject the Prince’s excitement so went along with it.

And one bag of doughnuts, two massive teddies won and multiple rides later, their day was drawing to a close.

“What shall we do for our last ride then?” Diavolo asked excitedly, “we better make it a good one, right Lucifer?”

“Yes, my Lord.” He mumbled.

“I was thinking we could go on the log flume?” MC proposed, “it shouldn’t matter if we get wet now because we’re leaving.”

“Well count me out!” Lucifer quickly shook his head, “if you expect me to drive us back to the hotel with a soggy bottom you’ve got another thing coming.”

“Excellent.” Diavolo grinned, “that just means I get to sit next to MC on this one.”

Suddenly Lucifer had a small pout on his face as he watched Diavolo and MC skip off to the ride while he was left carrying the oversized teddies. The Prince was so excited that he hadn’t even realised he’d grabbed MC’s hand and practically dragged her along with him.

Just like every other ride they’d been on, they waited in the queue patiently, laughing to each other as they talked nonsense. And then eventually, reaching the front, they made their way to their log.

Being the biggest, Diavolo had to sit at the back - not that he minded though. In fact, he rather liked the idea of the human leaning into him. Perhaps if MC got scared, he could be the knight in shining armour who wraps his arms around her?

As the ride started, the two of them continued smiling as their log drifted down the watery path.

“This has been an absolutely fantastic day, MC.” Diavolo beamed, “I know we’re supposed to be here on business but this one break has lifted so much stress for me; I’d love it if we could do this more often.”

“Of course, my Lord!” MC grinned, “I’m sure the other brothers would love it here too.”

“Well...” Diavolo smirked, “I was actually thinking it could just be the two of us. Perhaps there’s more of the human realm you’d love to show me.”

Suddenly MC was blushing as their log began drifting up the incline. It was rather steep and as they got closer to the top, the human began to giggle. “I forgot how high this is!”

“You’ve lived with 7 of the most powerful demons and it’s the log flume that frightens you?” Diavolo joked, unable to wipe the smile off his face.

“You can’t compare the two!” MC laughed as she felt herself lean back; gravitating toward Diavolo’s muscular torso.

Feeling the log begin to slow down, their bodies began to tilt forward. “Hold on tight.” Diavolo grinned as he wrapped his arms unconsciously around MC as she continued shuffling closer to his torso.

She let out a squeak as they went down. Being so flustered by the Prince behind her, MC forgot to mention that there was a camera on this ride. Therefore, neither of them noticed when there was a bright flash for a split second as they soared down the slope.

Of course, having a 7ft tall, absolutely ripped demon on the ride, the log naturally caused a huge splash. And all of that water soon came falling down on them both as they laughed.

“Oh wow!” Diavolo chuckled, “I haven’t smiled like that in a long time.”

The pair of them were too busy enjoying each other’s company to notice the extent of how wet they were. Reaching the end of the ride, they stepped out of the log and made their way to the photo booth.

Of course, Diavolo fell in love with their photo. Even though neither of them were looking at the camera, he loved how natural it was. Both had huge smiles on their faces and were sat incredibly close to each other. Therefore, Diavolo bought every option; a printed photo, a key ring, a fridge magnet - actually he got two fridge magnets because he thought Barbatos may want one - an electric copy...you name it.

Walking away from the ride with Diavolo carrying his new bag of photo gifts, they approached Lucifer. However, both of them were surprised when he didn’t greet them as normal.

His eyes were wide and his lips were parted as he gawped at the two of them walking toward him.

“Luci?” MC chuckled, “what’s wrong?”

“Yeah! You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Diavolo laughed.

“Sorry, my Lord.” Lucifer blushed, quickly diverting his eyes from where they were glued to, “I just think that perhaps white wasn’t the best colour to wear on such a ride.”

Turning to face each other as they were confused, MC and Diavolo suddenly noticed what had happened. Perhaps Lucifer was right. After all, what happens to white clothes when they get wet? They go see through. And what a day for MC to not wear a bra...

“Oh...” Diavolo smirked before biting his lip teasingly. He hadn’t even realised he could quite clearly see MC’s breasts and now that he has seen them, he couldn’t take his eyes off them! “Now I definitely want to come back here.”

Meanwhile, MC was blushing profusely. She didn’t know whether to be flustered by Diavolo’s stare or the fact that she could see each of his defined muscles. And not only that, she could quite clearly see his nipple piercings too.

The three of them were stood in silence momentarily.

“Perhaps we should get you both dried off before we go back to the car.” Lucifer cleared his throat, still trying to act unbothered.

“That won’t be necessary.” Diavolo simpered, holding his arm out for MC. Stepping into his side, she grinned to herself as Diavolo wrapped her in an embrace. “We’re fine like this.”

“Mhm.” MC nodded eagerly.

Lucifer eyed the pair of them up. He didn’t like just how close the two of them had gotten on their trip. He’s a very territorial demon and seeing somebody else with what he believes is ‘his’ made him feel uncomfortable. But how was he supposed to pull MC away from Diavolo?

“In fact, to avoid getting you wet too Lucifer, I think I’ll sit in the back with MC for the rest of the journey.” Diavolo stated with a not so innocent smile.

“Yes...my Lord.” Lucifer nodded very hesitantly.

[captainpains]

Sunshine (Commander Fox x reader)

Have fun with this cute trash for our favorite Fox!! Happy New Year!

Warnings: gn reader, food mentioned (does that count as a warning?), pining, Fox is horny, Fox to the rescue, mentions of a bombing, poor writing, much longer than normal (I think it’s like 1.8 k)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Annoying.

Commander Fox of the Coruscant Guard was no stranger to annoying senators and their aids. From accusing others of stealing frivolous things to stupid complaints, the Republic senators truly loved to annoy Fox and take up the guard’s time. There was also no end to the gossiping of the aids. If Fox had a credit for every time he heard a rumor that a senator was having an affair, he would have enough to buy the GAR. 

He had one saving grace in the chaos. You.

You were a representative from a planet he had forgotten the name of. You looked like a ray of sunshine, shining brighter than any star. You were also pretty. The poor commander couldn’t focus whenever you were in close proximity. Despite his infatuation, Fox never actually talked to you. He merely enjoyed your presence, looking -- pining -- from afar.

Thorn noticed his fellow commander’s incessant staring at the representative. He had attempted to convince his brother that it wasn’t healthy to live his life in love with someone and never tell them. He never listened. Fox was a man that followed the rules and regulations religiously. The only time he ever broke a rule was when he was a cadet. He ran the smuggling ring for sweets and holovids on Kamino. Somehow the Kaminoans were none the wiser. 

However, this was not as simple a smuggling sweets to cadets. 

So when you were threatened directly by an assassin, Thorn jumped at the opportunity to facilitate some sort of interaction between you two. Against Fox’s will, he would stand guard at your Coruscant apartment, all night every night until you were deemed out of danger. Fox wanted to strangle him when he told him. 

So that’s how he ended up standing in the corner of your kitchen while you made dinner. You had questioned why the guard had sent a commander to protect you, a representative from a practically unknown planet. But you decided not to voice your concerns. You were sure they had their reasons. And it’s not like you minded the constant presence of the imposing commander. You found him quite attractive, despite never seeing his face. The way he carried himself and the way he walked was so sexy to you...

You let out a yelp when some grease splashed onto your hand, bringing you out of your thoughts. You yanked your hand away from the pan. You massaged the hand in hopes of soothing the small burn. You let out a frustrated groan and glared at the meal you were preparing. You managed to finish cooking without incident. You sat down at the kitchen table and silently ate. 

Commander Fox, meanwhile, was making a mental list of things he had to do. He also kept your file open on his HUD, just out of curiosity. Through your file he learned that you had seven siblings, at least twenty other living relatives, and had a net worth that made Senator Amidala look poor. Despite this, he found your apartment rather modest for someone of your statis. It was only two bedrooms with three refreshers -- which was tiny for most representatives. Fox also noticed the large amount of pictures and cultural artifacts that adorned the walls and shelves. Most of the holopics were of people who he assumed to be family and friends. 

He turned his head and appreciated the several pictures hanging on the wall next to him. His eyes locked onto a picture of you with two girls (who he assumed to be your sisters) standing in front of a large building. You were wearing some... revealing attire with a massive grin spread across your face. He couldn’t help the tiny groan that escaped him as he imagined you wearing it for him. 

“Commander Fox? Are you alright?” You asked, turning in your chair to face him.

“Sorry, representative. I didn’t get much sleep last night.” It wasn’t a total lie. He stayed up late worrying -- a little too much -- about his assignment as your guard.

“You should try to get more sleep. You’ll be staying up with me for the next few days,” you offered a shy smile before standing and moving to clean your dishes.

“With you?” He questioned, moving to look at you once again.

“I don’t sleep very well off my home planet,” you nodded towards the wall of photos Fox was just admiring. “It’s a small thing I inherited from my mother.”

“That’s something strange to inherit.” He commented, making a mental note to look into that. 

“Humans are strange when it comes to genetics. My best friend got an intense love for spotchka from their father.” You explained, turning to lean against the kitchen counter. 

“That’s likely a coincidence.” Fox replied, taking your position as an invitation to look your body up and down. While your clothes weren’t as skimpy as the ones from the photo, they weren’t exactly modest either. 

“It would seem so. But every one of their siblings has the same affinity for spotchka,” you chuckled. 

“Human genetics can be quite odd. I wouldn’t be surprised it that was the case.” He replied.

“I suppose so,” You bite back a smile.

After that, something changed in the air between you two. It was never awkward before, but it was more relaxed. You enjoyed the company. Fox was still strictly professional. Although, he did mess up once. He was attempting to get your attention, alert you that the speeder had arrived, and he accidentally called you by the nickname Thire had given you. Sunshine. He died of embarrassment. However, you found his slip up to be endiring. He was only human after all. 

About a week into the arrangement. You were resting in the living room of your apartment. You were practicing drawing, a hobby you picked up for relaxation. With multiple threats towards you, it had been a tense week. Everyone was on edge. So you decided to kick back and relax with some sketching. Problem was, you had no idea what to draw. You started by sketching a body -- a human male body. Then it just devolved into page after page of Commander Fox. He was in various poses, some heroic some oddly domestic. There were even a couple of drawings of what you assumed his face looked like. It was when you had reached true inner peace. Only for it to be interrupted by Fox. 

“Is that me?” He asked, pointing to your most recent sketch. He hadn’t meant to snoop, but he was your guard. It was his job to observe everything in order to ensure your safety. That included you. 

“Sorry. I just draw what I see...” You cleared your throat. 

“No, it’s fine. I’m just not used to being...” He couldn’t think of a word for it.

“The subject of art?” You finished for him, sounding unsure of yourself. You stood up from the couch, walking to the kitchen to retrieve a cup of caf. 

“I guess that’s one way to put it.” Fox followed you diligently into the kitchen. 

Before you could respond there were a loud bang and a bright flash of light. You couldn’t do anything as the transparisteel of the kitchen shattered. You felt a sharp pain in your legs before everything went dark. ---------- You woke up with a start. Sitting straight up breathing heavily. You were in a bright white room. Once your eyes adjusted to the light, you realized you were in the senate medbay. You looked around and found your friend, Mira, sitting in a chair next to your bed.

“Thank the maker, you’re awake,” she let out a sigh of relief. “I’ll go tell the doctor that you’re finally awake.”

Mira left and retrieved the doctor. After a long discussion, you found out that your apartment building was bombed and that you had been passed out for a couple of days. You had sustained injuries to your lower back and legs, as well as a few cuts from the glass. 

Mira stayed with you for the majority of the day. She showed you news reports on her datapad and gifted you with some of your favorite candy. She even managed to recover your sketchbook and gave it to you. Near the end of the day, as visiting hours came to an end, there was a commotion by the nurse's desk. It sounded like a man trying to visit somebody, and he was being very insistent. 

“Sir! I’m sorry to say, but I can not allow you in! Visiting hours are nearly over! You will have to come back tomorrow.” The nurse sounded frantic to get the man away.  

“I’ll only be a few minutes.” The man argued. The voice sounded vaguely familiar. 

“Sir!” The nurse, again, sounded frantic. 

It was then that Commander Fox came into view. He wasn’t wearing his armor, strutting around in only his blacks. His eyes lit up when he spotted you. Ignoring the nurse that was tailing him, he made his way over to you. Mira gave you a questioning look. You only replied with a sheepish smile. When he got closer, you could see the dark circles under his eyes and the five-o’clock shadow on his face. 

“I guess I’ll leave you two alone to talk.” Mira awkwardly said, giving a nod to the nurse as an apology as she left. The nurse gave a wary look before she left. Fox moved and stood next to your bed. His eyes were looking you up and down, surveying your injures, before sitting down in “Is there a reason you decided to come to visit me, commander?” You asked after a long moment of silence.

“I was just checking in on you... Ya know Thire was worried.” He lied. He was a horrible liar. He also sounded exhausted, like he hadn’t slept for a coruscant week.

“Commander, if I didn’t know any better, I would say it sounds like you were worried about me,” you grinned.

“Again, just doing my job...” There was a long, heavy pause before he spoke again, his voice barely above a whisper, “I thought I lost you...”

“Thanks to you, commander, I’m still here,” You replied in a low voice, taking his hand in yours. 

“Almost lost you. Almost lost my sunshine...” he muttered sleepily, his eyes starting to drift close. But you smiled at the nickname nonetheless. 

“It’s alright now...” you spoke in a hushed tone, reaching for his hand. 

He gave your hand a squeeze, a smile appearing on his face. He continued to drift off into sleep, muttering nonsense as he did so. You could only make out one thing as he finally fell asleep.

“’night, sunshine.” 

[nataliedanovelist]

GF - Where the Crop Circles Grow ch.1

Summary: When things get out of hand at the Pines’ family farm, Ford asks an old college buddy to assist investigating anomalies and Stan hires a farmhand. Who knew asking for help would actually get you somewhere?

For @lemonfodrizzleart. Part of her Farmer AU and featuring her OC, Jackie Asante.

Ao3 link here.

ch.2

~~~~~~~~~~

“Jackie, was it?” Stan repeated as he rocked in his chair, the shade feeling comfortable with the warm summer’s day baking everything that dared to escape air conditioning.

“Yes, sir.” The woman repeated. Her ankles were crossed as she sat in her rocking chair, her hands on her lap. Nerves hindered her normal behavior; Never in a million years would she sit like this, unless she really wanted a job and wanted to impress her potential employer.

The man in a gray t-shirt (it might have been white at some point), dirty jeans, and boots raised an eyebrow at her and waved the response away with a strong hand. “First off, there’s no need for all that sir-stuff, okay? I ain’t that old.”

Jackie let out a good-natured snort and smiled more relaxed. “Okay.” She sat a little bit more relaxed, now one knee over the other, and she rocked a little in her blue-jeans, white t-shirt, and light-purple jacket, the bottoms of the side tied together and her sleeves rolled up.

Stan looked at her, reading her as if she was a book, and he instantly knew he would like her. Something in the sparkle in her dark eyes, something in the way she held herself up promised the whole world that she was way more capable than what people initially believed and she was going to rub it in their faces.

Okay, now that he got that out of the way, what was he supposed to do now? Sixer probably had a pamphlet full of things to do or a check-list in his brain of what to ask her, but that genius got distracted by some new freaky thing and ran off into the woods, but not without telling Stan to interview the potential farmhand. Why’d he have to do this? It was all Sixer’s idea. While a farmhand was probably a good idea, Stan would’ve hoped they could save the dough by making Ford and his friend from college work, but both brothers knew that wasn’t going to happen. Well, she was here. Might as well get her a drink.

“Want a soda or somethin’?” Stan asked as he stood and stretched his arms over his head, his shirt stretched tightly over his gut and strong chest.

Jackie shrugged with a smile and stood. “Sure, thanks.”

Stan waved towards himself casually, signalling her to follow him, and he led the way inside the house. Jackie followed him and allowed herself to take in the space without being too nosy. In front of the doorway was a big living room with a yellow-plaid couch and matching armchair, a card table, a wood-burning stove, and even a TV. An owl-themed tick-tock clock hooted the time (11:00am) with eleven wheezy hoots. Stan led the way to the left, the opposite direction of the stairs leading up to the second floor, and into the kitchen.

Jackie’s face flinched a little bit at the state of the room, a big mess all over the table and every square inch of counter decorated with books, food, and dirty dishes. Jackie stood at the doorway and couldn’t help but notice a picture of a family hanging by her head. A man with a straw hat and sunglasses stood tall and strong behind his family, while his wife sat with a set of twins in her arms, hugging them with a big smile. A third boy, about three years older than the twins, smiled in front of the father and besides the mother. 

“Well, this here’s the kitchen.” Stan narrated pointlessly to fill the air, stealing Jackie from her thoughts. His head was in the fridge but he soon emerged with two glass bottles of Pitt soda. He even popped one open for Jackie before giving it to her. “Livin’ room’s just by the door, then past the stairs is two bedrooms, one’s a master with a bathroom, and then upstairs is the attic and two more bedrooms.”

“Nice place.” Jackie complimented.

“Thanks.” Stan said after a sip of soda. “Pa left it to me and my brother. We got another brother, Shermie, but he’s workin’ for a bank in California. Got a kid now and everythin’.”

“Ah, somebody’s an uncle.” The dark-skinned woman commented with a smile.

Stan grinned proudly and seemed to have straightened his stance just a little bit. “Yup. Anyways, what made you wanna work here?”

Jackie shrugged. “I’ve always liked the fresh air n’ workin’ hard. My mama used to say sittin’ still’s a sin.”

Stan smiled in agreement. He was right; he liked this girl. “Okay, so what can you do?”

Jackie took a second to think of what she can do that applies to a farm. Really, in her mind the list kept growing. She couldn’t think of a single thing she couldn’t do if she really tried, so she gave him a sly smile and said, “Anythang.”

Stan barked a laugh and freed a finger from holding the bottle to point at her. “I like your style! Alright, so how much you want a month?”

“Eight-hundred.”

Stan raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you think that’s a little high?” Not that he was worried; he liked to negotiate.

“Don’t you think I need enough to rent a place?” Jackie returned.

Stan snorted. “If you’re looking for a place to stay, we’ve got three… well, two bedrooms we aren’t usin’. You could stay with us rent-free for cheaper pay.”

“Well how much you willin’ to fork over?”

Stan grinned. Yup, he liked her. He wasn’t going to lose such a promising worker. “Five-hundred a month.”

“Deal.” Jackie held out a hand to shake.

Stan grasped it and shook. “Then you’re hired. You can have tomorrow to move in and…”

“No, I can start work tomorrow.” Jackie insisted. “Just give me this afternoon.”

Stan grinned. “Alright, fine. You’ll start first thing in the mornin’ tomorrow. You’ll know when. Go get what you need and I’ll show you your room and give you the full tour of the farm. There’s a stable and chicken coop and barn and fields full of work, as you saw comin’ in. You’ve got your work cut out for you.”

Stan exited the kitchen, giving Jackie a good look at the dirty kitchen. She sneered playfully to herself, “I can see that,” and followed her new boss out of the house.

~~~~~~~~~~

Ford was tired, but satisfied with his success. He collapsed into a rocking chair on the porch and glanced down at the photos in his hands; that polaroid Stanley got him for Hanukkah was being used well. It was so rare to get pictures of the floating eyes so crystal clear, mostly only seeing them at night, but these were lurking in the shadows of the overgrown trees and bush of the woods, and by sheer luck and perfect timing on Ford’s part, he got what he wanted.

The six-fingered investigator pulled out his journal from his messenger bag and bookmarked a page to fill out later with the photos. As he closed the book and became lost in thought at the sight of his golden handprint, the screen door opened and Stanley poked his head in. “Hey, dinnertime, nerd.”

“Coming,” Ford said as his brother left and he got to his feet, suddenly very hungry and ready to eat so he could finish his work for today.

While Stanley sat in a chair, rubbed his hands together, and smacked his lips at the table, Ford stood at the doorway with his jaw hanging like an executed criminal. Laid out on the big table in the kitchen was a plate full of fried chicken, collard greens, a skillet of cornbread, mashed potatoes with cheese, and unless Ford’s nose was playing tricks on him, there was something made of chocolate in the oven. Even more surprising than the mouth-watering meal was the stranger in the house. 

Untying a long apron, a dark-skinned woman with short black hair was standing by the hooks on the walls for keys and hats. She smiled as she hung her apron up and said, “Wash up, Mr. Pines. Oh, excuse me. Dr. Pines.” She added playfully.

Ford snorted. Apparently Stanley already told her about his twelve PhDs. “Please, call me Ford, ma’am.” He requested as he went to the kitchen sink to wash his hands. “Let me guess… you decided to hire Ms. Jackie Asante, Knucklehead?”

“You make it sound like it’s a bad idea.” Stan quipped as Jackie sat in the chair on his right. He threw her a wink, which her eyes sparkled at.

“Quite the contrary, considering she clearly sees fit to celebrate Thanksgiving any day of the year.” Ford said as he sat in the chair across the table from his twin.

Jackie smiled with hot cheeks and shrugged. “Clearly you’ve been starving out here. Well, you can forget TV dinners and take-out for awhile. At least not while I’m breathing.”

“Now hold up, take-out’s delicious.” Stan defended as he brought a chicken leg up to his lip and bit down with a beautiful crunch. His eyes grew wide and he sagged in relief and delight. He munched on his chicken happily and managed to wheeze out between bites. “Fuck take-out.”

“Stanley,” Ford scolded lightly before trying his dinner, but he was amazing and started mumbling swears like a sailor.

Meanwhile, Jackie grinned proudly into her cup of water and started to cut up the cornbread. Maybe getting this job was a good idea after all.

[jasontoddiefor]

Chapter 11 of that one story in which Robin #3 is magic, literally.

Read on AO3

Robin woke up again when somebody knocked gently against his door. Sleepily, he crawled out of his bed and walked over to the door. He had fallen asleep in yesterday’s clothes and given the bright sunlight already shining through the curtains, Robin must have slept through the night.

Tentatively he opened the door just a crack. He expected Alfred, not Nightwing to be standing there, looking quite nervously. He was dressed in civilian clothes and it painted a quite different picture than that of the serene vigilante of before. He seemed tired, vulnerable.

“Can I come in?”

Robin opened the door wordlessly and stepped aside to make space for him.

Nightwing entered the room and looked around. The room was a little more lived-in than it had been when Robin first saw it, but it still wasn’t anything special. Still, somehow he was embarrassed by it. Robin had been made to be striking and the room wasn’t special compared to all the others in the manor.

“It’s nice,” Nightwing said, walking up and down.

He was uncomfortable in Robin’s presence and stalling time on top of it. With a sigh, Robin sat down at his desk chair.

“Do you want anything in particular, Nightwing?”

Nightwing frowned at him, confusion sprinkled all over his face like his freckles.

“Night- you can call me Dick, if you want to.” Dick stopped talking, halted, and realization took hold of him. “You do know who I am, right?”

“Richard ‘Dick’ John Grayson,” Robin replied easily, the knowledge of the previous Robin’s identity as clear as if he’d downloaded it from the batcomputer. “Twenty-one-years old, Blüdhaven vigilante operating as Nightwing . You’re also a founding member of the Teen Titans, a group of mostly teenagers to young adults, most of whom were former sidekicks of-“

“Woah, woah, kid, slow down.” Dick held up his hands in a placating manner, now grinning sheepishly. “I see you know your stuff. But yes, you can call me Dick if you want to.”

Robin rolled his eyes. “Well, I have to ‘know my stuff’ as Robin. Not that I’m doing much of that right now.”

Dick winced and, deflating like an old balloon, sat down on Robin‘s unmade bed.

“It’s not an easy time for Bruce- all of us really. Jason’s death… Nobody but that fucking clown is to blame, but Bruce still feels responsible.”

Dick’s eyes hardened and his voice edged on the corner of terrifyingly dangerous just after mentioning the Joker.

“But I’m not Jason!” Robin argued. “I’m not much of anyone but Robin, and Batman doesn’t even let me be that!”

Robin crossed his arms over his chest, already in a fool mood. The day had hardly started and he was already angry. Great. Dick observed him silently and Robin didn’t want to know what kind of impression he was making on the other vigilante.

“I might not be able to change Batman’s opinion on that, not given the terms we are on now, but I could use another set of eyes.”

Dick seemed to be hesitant saying those words, but Robin almost immediately began vibrating with energy.

“You want my help?” Robin asked, almost toppling his chair when he hurried to stand up.

Dick nodded seriously. “Yes, that’s why I came to the Cave originally. I’m tracking a ring of arms dealers and Batman has the better tech, but I think I’ll work just as fast with you helping out. So do you want to-“

“Yes!” Robin shouted. “Yes, yes, yes, please. I’ve been trying to solve old cold cases from the police, but without leaving the manor my investigations have been going super slowly and please let me help!”

Dick laughed and stood up. “Alright, alright. Down to the kitchen again then? Alfred's made breakfast and my files are downstairs. I suppose I have to get them from the Cave. You can change into something fresh in the meanwhile.”

“Sounds like a plan!”

As soon as Dick had left the room, Robin rushed to his wardrobe and quickly put on new clothes. A pair of sweatpants, gray this time, and a comfortable black and yellow Batman sweatshirt later, Robin was sitting at the kitchen table, munching on his cornflakes while Dick was sorting through his files.

Alfred had tsk’ed once in disapproval, but given that Robin wasn’t supposed to be in the Cave, they had to take their work upstairs.

Working alongside Nightwing was fun. The vigilante was perceptive and Robin admired how efficiently he worked, and how well he knew his city and its criminals. He gave Robin a quick rundown of what organization they were dealing with, how they operated and what had tipped Nightwing off.

Then the two of them started tracing the organization’s work back to Gotham, slowly dismantling them. After a couple hours had passed, they had connected the dealers with their buyers and began strategizing how to take them down.

“You’re pretty good at this,” Nightwing told Robin.

Robin smiled, this time with nothing holding him back. “Thanks. You’re not so bad yourself either, Nightwing.”

Nightwing messes up Robin’s hair delightfully, not even stopping when Robin shrieked.

“I told you, it’s Dick. If you’re gonna stick around a while longer, it’s only right you call me by my name.”

Robin pushed away the sheets of paper they had covered with mindmaps and leaned forward on the table, mustering Dick.

“Are you also going to stick around?”

Dick scratched the back of his head, eyes darting to the family photo sitting on the window sill. It was a small picture in a wooden frame depicting Alfred, Bruce, Dick and Barbara somewhere in the gardens. Right next to it was another picture of Jason, probably only a few months after his adoption, in his school uniform, standing in the foyer together with Bruce. Bruce was beaming and Jason smiling shyly. Robin wouldn’t know what he’d do if Batman ever smiled at him like that, probably start crying.

“I think I’ll show up a little more often,” Dick finally answered. “The Titans- they’re fine. Blüdhaven, of course, still needs me, but she’s not called Gotham’s sister city for nothing. If Gotham gets worse, Blüdhaven does as well. It’s in my best interest to keep an eye on Gotham as well.”

Dick said Gotham , but Robin guessed what he actually meant was Batman .

“I’ll make sure everything works out here in your absence,” Robin promised. “Or, I’ll try my best at least.”

“That’s more than enough, trust me,” Dick smiled.

That was when Alfred entered the kitchen and with barely ten words, told them to pack up so he could prepare lunch. Quickly, Robin and Dick cleaned up and put the various sheets they had stolen from the arts and crafts room in different folders so Dick could take them home comfortably.

Dick put everything in his blue messenger back and set off to deposit it back in his room. Since he said nothing to Robin, Robin decided to follow him. The family wing looked just like it did a month ago, freshly cleaned with nothing out of place.

Dick opened the door to his room and let Robin inside. Now that Robin was seeing Dick’s room for a second time, he could see how well it fit Dick. The CD player in the corner was angled in such a way that you got the best sound and the stacks of CDs next to it were a wild mix of modern pop, the 80s and bands that used to be popular a couple of years ago.

The right wall of the otherwise blue room was covered by a large mural. The skyline of a city with a lot of air balloons swinging gently in the wind above.

“Where is that?” Robin asked.

“Huh?” Dick turned his head to look in the same direction as Robin. “Oh. That? That’s Paris about ten years back? It was the first big vacation Bruce and I took. We went to Europe and tracked through France. Nobody knew who we were, it was quite refreshing. Especially since I hadn’t gotten used to the fame that came with being Bruce Wayne’s ward yet. There was a tournament or so near Paris and the sky was full of the balloons. It was the highlight of the vacation for me. And if not for the drug-dealing ring we accidentally shattered, I think it would have been Bruce’s as well.”

Robin, who had sat down on the bed, did a double-take at hearing about Dick and Bruce's adventure.

“You accidentally took down a drug-dealing ring? How do you even do that?”

Dick laughed and sat down on the ground, leaning against his bookshelves. “Okay, so it’s probably not even that funny, but you know how Bruce has a sixth sense for crime? So we’re walking down that beautiful alley and Bruce just freezes and squints at some shady dudes in one corner…”

Dick latched onto the story, narrating in great detail Robin and Batman’s adventure in Europe. And because he kept making references to other missions and the like, Dick kept going off track and told Robin more and more stories.

The longer he talked, the happier did Dick seem to become, and Robin too was pulled in by his enthusiasm. Some of these stories Robin knew, but the more he learned, the more did he realize that factual knowledge couldn’t compare to Dick’s vibrant description of the time Batman and Robin saved the holidays. The life Dick had lived was so colorful and fantastic - Robin wanted something like that for himself.

He could do without taking a swim in the sewers, but he’d give everything for Batman to look at him with the same fond exasperation Dick talked of.

“And that’s the reason why Bruce and I shared a hotel room,” Dick ended his monologue. “Talking rooms - is there a reason we relocated to the guest wing?”

Robin shrugged. “I think that’s Alfred’s doing. Bruce wasn’t sleeping well here.”

“Or at all?” Dick guessed with a sigh. “It’s no surprise with Jason’s room next door.”

“I found him in there in my first week,” Robin blurted out. “I don’t know what he was doing. He was just sitting on the ground and I had no idea how to act!”

“Don’t blame yourself,” Dick said. “Everybody grieves in a different way.”

Robin knew that Dick was trying to reassure him, but his words weren’t helping. Robin was well aware of how grief worked, it was part of their job and so he knew it, but he still couldn’t do anything to support Batman because he kept locking Robin out.

“But I still want to help him and I can’t because he won’t even let me come near him.”

“I promise I’ll talk to him when he gets him tonight. Maybe I can get Bruce to slow down a little. We’re not as close as we used to be, but maybe I can improve the situation a little.”

“And what should I do in the meantime?”

Dick reached up and pulled a book out of his shelf. Easily, he threw it at Robin. “Live a little.”

Robin caught the book and turned it around so he could read the cover. Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone.

The book looked rather old and worn. A quick flip through revealed pages covered in all kinds of ink and markers.

“What’s this?” Robin asked.

“The first Harry Potter book,” Dick answered. “I had to read it for class a couple years back and took a lot of notes in it. Kids your age are supposed to like it-”

“You mean one month going on one decade?” Robin replied snarkily, but Dick didn’t even  bother to reply to that.

“-and even beyond that. It’s just a fun book to read. Try to broaden your horizon a little further away from Robin or you’ll go mad.”

Dick fell silent and crossed his arms in front of his chest as he tilted his head slightly. He was observing Robin - no, the mask Robin couldn’t take off.

“And we need to do something about that too. You can’t keep running around  in the house with a mask and without a name.”

Robin just rolled his eyes. He supposed this was where he differed from regular humans. Robin was all he was and all he ought to be. He didn’t need to broaden his horizon.

“I have a name! I already told you that! It’s Robin.”

“Yeah, no.” Dick shook his head. “Robin is a title . You need a name.”

Robin didn’t get it. Maybe this was another one of these civilian life things he was supposed to follow now? It seemed that no matter how hard he tried, the others just didn’t understand that Robin was all he would ever be and all he was supposed to be. It was fine, he didn’t mind if he would actually get to do his job.

“I’m fine without, really,” Robin insisted.

From Dick’s sigh, Robin deduced that he didn’t believe him, but it wasn’t like this discussion would go anywhere anytime soon.

“Just try it, alright? You don’t just have vigilantism in your DNA.”

Robin was going to argue that he very much did, going by the components that constructed his DNA and its donors, but decided against it in the last second. If Dick was too stubborn to see it, Robin would just have to accept it and move on. At least he’d have some more entertainment for the next weeks.

“Thanks for the book,” Robin said instead.

Dick smiled. “No problem. You can tell me what you thought of it when you’ve read it. I’m curious to hear your thoughts on it. Bruce would always try to overinterpret the book instead of just enjoying it.”

Robin blinked.

“How do you just enjoy it?”

Dick began to laugh and threw back his head so far, that it knocked against his bookshelf, but even the sudden pain from that didn’t seem to deter him.

“I’m serious!” Robin said, his cheeks flushed red. “Explain!”

But Dick kept on laughing, bright and joyful.

[littlestarofthewest]

Title: One New Message | Word Count: 3106 | Rating: Explicit

Pairing: Arthur Morgan x female reader | Tags: rough sex, modern au

Summary: After a delicious third date with Arthur, you long to see him again, and try to shorten the waiting time by sending him nude photos. Soon, you have to rethink that behavior, when Arthur shows you what he does to bad girls.

There are a thousand things you should be doing instead of dreaming about Arthur Morgan. Still, you find yourself sprawled out on your sofa, fantasizing about the man like you've never done with anybody else before. You have a good reason, though.

After managing two dates without anything happening, you faltered on the third date, jumping Arthur like a feral cat. Not that you regret it. That was the best sex you've had in your life. The only problem is that you can't stop thinking about it. 

The date was two weeks ago, and the only other time you could find where you're both available for another date is still a week away. You have no idea how you're supposed to hold out that long. 

For the tenth time today, you open up your last conversation with Arthur on your phone. He wished you a good night, but not a good morning. You don't blame him, knowing that he's busy with work. There's also a good chance he doesn't want to bother you, assuming that you're working yourself. 

Looking at Arthur's picture on your phone, you decide you need at least a little something from him, so you type a quick message.

"good morning, big guy. what are you up to?"

First, you're not sure about the nickname. It's kind of a joke. The words just tumbled out of you the second you got Arthur out of his underwear, and he laughed so hard you almost gave up on the sex altogether. Lucky for you, Arthur came back to his senses when you crawled on top of him. As you wallow in memories of that night, your phone buzzes in your hand.

"you're the only thing that keeps me from strangling my co-worker. I really don't want to go to jail right now"

You smile, even when you feel sorry that Arthur seems to have a bad day.

"you need a little distraction?"

The reply comes instantly.

"yes please!"

You look around your living room, wondering what you could talk about that would cheer Arthur up and distract him enough so he won't lose his head about some idiot. At first, you draw a complete blank, but then your thoughts go back to that night with Arthur.

"I'm sitting on my sofa, thinking about our night together"

You barely sent the message when you see that Arthur is typing.

"wish to god I could be on that sofa with you"

Your heart does a little leap and warmth pools in your stomach. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all. You've been awfully horny just thinking about Arthur, talking with him makes matters a thousand times worse. At first, you think about replying, maybe even flirt a little or tease him, but then another idea enters your mind. You struggle with it, not sure if it's too much, but the thought won't let go of you.

Getting up from the sofa, you pull down your jeans before lying back down. You try to find a proper angle and take a few pictures of your panties. You've never liked photos of yourself much, but when Arthur was with you, he sure seemed to like what he saw. The thought of him opening your message in the middle of work and seeing you like this is intoxicating. Taking a deep breath, you send one of the pictures without any explanation.

The messenger tells you that it got delivered, and your heart starts pounding, then you can tell that Arthur read the message. There's no answer, though. You jump up from your sofa, pacing back and forth, scolding yourself. It was too much. Or maybe it just wasn't a good idea to send something like this in the middle of the day. What if somebody else looked at Arthur's phone? You're about to send another message to apologize when your phone finally buzzes in your hand.

"please tell me you're not lying there like this when I can't be there"

You take a few deep breaths, happy that you didn't mess up, and his reply makes you eager to tease him even more. Pulling off your shirt and bra, you lie back down on the sofa. It takes a little fumbling, but you get yourself and the couch into the frame, trying your best to hold a seductive pose. Then you play with your nipples, making them stand up nice and hard for the picture. The only thing missing from it is your face, just in case anybody else might be able to sneak a look. Again, you send the picture without comment.

Lying there, waiting for Arthur's response, your mind keeps wandering back to your last date. Without thinking, your hand goes back to your breasts, teasing yourself, and then you move down your body just like Arthur did. Before you know it, your palm presses against your sex, and you tease yourself with a slow rub until your phone announces another message.

"Jesus, sweetheart. you know I'm at work, are you trying to kill me?"

"you like it?" you reply, and Arthur's answer comes back immediately.

"like it? I might stain my pants any second"

That sure is a nice thought, not only for him. You spread your legs further apart, imagining how Arthur has to work, half-hard in his pants, trying to concentrate. You wish you could be there, drag him into a quiet corner, and seduce him to have you right then and there. You run your fingers over your folds at the thought, pushing the fabric of your panties a little deeper. Meanwhile, you keep teasing your nipples, and sensitive and horny as you are, it doesn't take long until your slick soaks through the panties. You keep rubbing yourself to create a visible stain and spreading your legs apart, you take another picture.

You send it with the words, "like this?"

To get easier access, you pull the panties down and dare to touch yourself without the fabric between you and your fingers. You enjoy how hot and wet you feel to the touch, remembering how Arthur moaned between your legs as he licked you. You've never been with a guy who got off like this while giving you pleasure, and his moans and sighs together with his tongue had you come so hard that you almost passed out. You're sure that your neighbors heard you scream.

Another message hits your phone, and you eagerly open it.

"don't tease me girl, or you gonna regret it"

You smile, and you can't stop your fingers from running through your wetness. Turned on like this, it's hard to think about consequences, so you hold your phone in position, taking a picture of your wet pussy with your fingers rubbing your clit. Usually, you're not in the right position to see yourself like this, but looking at it now, you have to admit that it's hot. There's no way you can keep this to yourself when you have the option to torture Arthur.

You write, "wish you were here," and include the last picture.

At first, you try to wait for a response, hoping that whatever Arthur says might throw you over the edge, but time goes on, and there's no reply. Judging by the way Arthur answered your first messages, you don't think that he's offended. He probably just really had to go back to work. You think about getting yourself off, but after starting this with Arthur, it somehow feels weird to finish on your own. Instead, you hop into your shower to cool off. 

When you're dressed, you think about what to do next, opting to at least finish one single task. You start with your kitchen, putting some boxes away that you carelessly left out after cooking the other day. Then you turn to the dishes, but before you can start the water, there's a rapid knock on your door. You hurry to open it, knowing that the delivery people rarely wait around for long, and you've been waiting for a package. 

The second you open the door, strong hands take hold of you and push you inside. 

"Arthur?" you squeal, unable to process how he got here so fast. 

Without an answer, he kicks the door shut before lifting you up and carrying you to your bedroom. Arthur throws you onto the bed, crawling over you before you have a chance to do anything. He puts a hand to your face, drawing you in for a kiss. It's eager and feverish from the start, far away from the soft kisses you shared at your date. 

Arthur's hands roam over your body, and he pulls up your shirt, lifting it over your head and pulling it off. Then, he kisses along your neck and down to your breasts, tasting the exposed skin. With a grunt, he reaches behind you, and in a swift movement, he opens your bra and drags it away as if it's the most significant nuisance he can think of. 

With a satisfied hum, he dives down and attacks your nipples with his mouth, licking and sucking so mercilessly that you ruin your second pair of panties today. As if he knows, he runs his hands down your body and opens your jeans, pulling it down together with your underwear.

Arthur's barely been here for a few minutes, but you're lying there naked and dripping wet, your skin flushed, and your breathing elevated. The effect he has on you is not fair. Trying your best to keep your head, you push your hands against his chest, keeping a bit of distance between the two of you.

"How can you even be here?"

"Told my boss, I had an emergency," he says, picking your hands off his chest and dragging them over your head.

"Emergency?" you ask, disbelief in your voice.

Arthur doesn't bother to hold your hands down, knowing that you'll keep them right there. Instead, his eyes roam over your body as he opens his pants. You can't help but stare as Arthur takes his cock out, biting your lip so you won't say anything stupid this time. He's hard in his hand but still runs his fingers up and down his length.

"Yes, an emergency," he says, his voice a deep growl. "I told you not to tease me, girl. Now I have to show you what happens when you do."

A shiver runs down your spine, and for a moment, you're not sure if you want to know what he's got planned for you. This Arthur is different from the one you met before, darker, way more out of control. He pushes your legs apart and takes his place between them, rubbing the tip of his cock along your wet folds.

"Are you ready for your lesson, sweetheart?"

You take a few deep breaths, but the fact that he still asks puts you at ease. "I didn't mean to be bad," you say, trying your best to sound innocent.

Arthur leans over you, his lips brushing against your own. "Oh, but you was. But don't worry. I'll make sure you're a good girl for me."

With the words, he pushes into you, and you can't help that you reach for him, your fingers digging into his shoulders. Arthur doesn't seem to mind. He slides in and out of you at a quick pace, giving you an idea about how this is going to be. You enjoy the rub and roll your hips in time with him, but then his fingers dig into your flesh. He keeps your hips from moving, and pulls back, almost sliding out of you. Then he pushes back in with a hard thrust. 

You let out a little scream, and Arthur pulls back out, watching you carefully. You try to ready yourself for the next push, but he leans in to kiss you, and only when you get lost in the heat of his mouth on yours does he thrust into you again. Arthur keeps going like this, teasing you over and over again until your nails dig deep into his skin.

Grabbing your hair, Arthur tilts your head to the side so he can bite along your neck, his tongue teasing your ear. "I think you're ready for a more intense lesson," he whispers, and before you have a chance to ask what that means, he shows you.

Holding you in place with his body, he fucks into you at a relentless pace, each thrust going so deep that you feel like he's splitting you open. His balls slap hard against your ass, making naughty sounds as your slick skin meets his again and again. Arthur bites down on your neck and sucks, licking circles over your skin. You're sure he's leaving a mark while all you can do is hold still and take it.

Arthur sits back a little then, pulling your legs up even further. With the new angle, it seems like he's rutting even deeper into you, his hands wandering over your body. It feels like he's touching you everywhere at the same time. Your stomach, your sides, your throat, your breasts, your nipples. All your nerves are on high alert, and your core is humming as if filled with electricity.

All the while, Arthur is watching you, slowing down to only roll his hips, drawing circles inside of you. With how sensitive you are, this is almost worse than the rough thrusts. You find yourself moaning even more, pushing yourself against Arthur.

"You know, I thought about this every day," he says. "I could just come by and surprise you, have you sit on my face or get you to ride me again. Maybe I could get you to be a good girl for me, have you do whatever I want."

You moan at the words, knowing full well that you would have done just that if he dared to come by. 

"But I tried to be good," Arthur says, his voice strained. "Didn't want to seem like I'm just after the sex. But there you are, being such a bad girl, sending all those pictures."

You gasp at a particularly deep thrust, running your hands over Arthur's chest as if to soothe him. "I'm so sorry."

"I know you are, sweetheart," Arthur says, kissing you again. It's a lot softer than before. "Just like I know that you'll be a good girl for me now."

"How?" you ask, eager to do what he says. 

He kisses you again, pleased with how compliant you are. "I'll watch when you come with my cock deep inside of you. You gonna be loud for me, letting everybody in this goddamn building know what I'm doing to you right now. Can you do that for me?"

"Yes," you moan, barely able to hold it in anyway, "oh God, yes."

Finally, he picks up the pace again, making you feel like you're being dragged up on a roller coaster, slowly but surely reaching the tipping point. Your slick soaks Arthur's cock, leaking out of you with every drag, and more and more heat pools between your legs.

Holding on to you, Arthur lets go off any reservations he might have had before. The way he fucks into you now makes you dizzy, and in between eager breaths, moans and cries tumble from your lips. The constant rub of Arthur's cock brings you closer and closer to the edge, and then he leans in, grabbing your hair.

"That's it, sweetheart," Arthur says. "You're such a good girl for me."

The contrast between his harsh movements and the sweet words push you over the edge. Arthur's warm voice fills you up just as much as his cock. You can't help but drag your nails over his back, leaving red streaks all over his skin. 

Your whole body tenses as your muscles squeeze his cock, your mouth falling open. You moan and cry as he keeps pushing into you, and only when your body goes slack, does he draw back. You have a few seconds to catch your breath before Arthur gets up. He's still holding your hair and pulls at it to get you into motion. He gets you on your knees in front of the bed, stroking his cock right in front of your face.

Drawing your head back by the hair, Arthur looks down at you, and you eagerly open your mouth. He pushes his cock between your lips with a grown, and you suck him in. It only takes a few more pushes until Arthur comes deep down your throat. You swallow everything he gives you, obediently licking him clean afterward.

Arthur sits down on the bed with a deep sigh before pulling you into his lap. You sling your legs around him, and he carefully takes your face in his hands. "You alright?"

"Fine," you say, smiling at him.

"Are you sure?" he asks, searching your eyes and looking guilty as hell. "I didn't mean to go that hard without even asking first."

You plant a kiss on his lips, putting your arms around his neck. "It's all good, Arthur. I might not be able to walk for a few days, but I enjoyed myself very much."

He lets out a little chuckle, the worry falling off of him, and you melt into him, enjoying the warmth. Arthur runs his hands over your body, but it's just a sweet caress now. You bury your face in his neck and breath him in, a bittersweet feeling welling up in you.

"Arthur?"

"Hm?"

"I don't think I can wait another week until our next date."

Arthur runs his hands up your back, playing with your hair. "I got some vacation days left. Maybe I should take a little bit of time off."

"Really?" you ask, drawing back to look at him. "You would do that?"

"Might be safer," Arthur says with a smile. "Not sure what I'd do if you keep sending pictures like that while I'm at work."

"Yeah," you say, kissing him again. "I guess it's better to give me a few more lessons before you leave me unsupervised again."

Arthur laughs. "I'm not sure there's a lesson in this world that could actually turn you into a good girl."

You lean in to bite his neck and roll your hips. "Don't give up on me yet."

"Never," Arthur says, his arms closing around you. 

You can't be sure, but at that moment, you like to think that you'll still send him dirty pictures even years from now.

[kathyprior4200]

Hazbinstagram: The Case of the Missing Blitzo

A Hazbinstagram ™ story

  An ongoing story from the great creators and artists of "Hazbinstagram!"

For as long as he could remember since July, Blitzo had found a new horse to be his loving friend. He loved her so much, that he gave her different names everyday. During his everyday life at I.M.P. Blitzo had claimed that his horse had helped him make decisions. His associates thought the horse was part of his imagination. Stolas wanted to meet his horse as well, to see what she looked like.

But one day, Blitzo mysteriously disappears after posing in a picture full of static. Many speculate that he had been kidnapped.

But who? Could it be the demon who photo-bombed his last photo? His horse? A rival company?

Or perhaps a familiar radio loving demon with sinister plans of his own...

Alastor has a shadowy horse creature with a skeletal body, sharp teeth and black wings. The eyes glow teal and the mane and tail are thick and black. The creature may have captured Blitzo and gone back to its master. (Art and idea by Radio Hazbin!)

Fun Fact: Alastor was also the name of one of Hades' horses when he rose from the ground to capture Persephone.

 Blitzo was seen smiling as he took a selfie in static. Red and black shapes were behind him, appearing to be a distorted form of reality.

 Blitzo spoke and texted with static lacing his words: “Hanging with my horse, Enamel Pin. She said it was ok for me to take a picture with her. O3O.”

 Cherri Bomb responded: “What the hell type of horse does this to a camera?”

 Other comments soon appeared on Instagram, or rather, Voxtagram as the TV Overlord owned all technological platforms.

 “No horse does that, but I know a deer who does.”

 “Who else is red, got antlers on his head and doesn’t like being on camera?”

 “I don’t think that’s a horse, I think that’s a certain deer overlord.”

 “Alastor, is that you?”

 “I think Blitzo’s horse friend might be a certain radio demon.”

 “Oh deer.”

 “I wonder if the horse and Alastor are related. He also has the effect on pictures.”

 “Are we speculating that Blitzo is riding Alastor…a new ship is coming!”

 “Please save Blitzo from that thing.”

  Stolas was concerned, and began to type. “Hm…Blitzo, I’m a bit concerned about your horse friend. I haven’t read anything on horses distorting cameras. Can we talk?”

 Blitzo replied in an arrogant tone: “I don’t know what you’re talking about. My horse can do whatever she wants. She’s just cool like that.”

 Stolas responded: “Alright, if you say so. I may do some more research on this. But I am glad she’s so kind to you, Blitzy.”

 Blitzo added: “She’s very nice and eats the cockroaches at my place.”

 Later, Blitzo posted a child-like colored drawing of himself holding an iced coffee in his hand. Below the drawing was a colored tan horse with a black mane with her head lowered, surrounded by gray. The picture read: ”How I met my horsie. One day, I was just walking to get coffee again. She was all alone. I asked her if she wanted coffee. She said “You bet I do.” As we sat at the table, everyone ran away screaming for some reason.”

 Blitzo posted: “The comic of my horsie and me meeting for the first time.”

 Moxxie responded with: “Will all due respect sir, your “horsie” looks nothing like that.”  

 A commenter asked, “Does he look like a deer?”

 Moxxie was flabbergasted at the comments. “Why do you guys keep saying that thing looks like a deer? That thing looks nothing close to those. You humans are weirdly obsessed with deers.”

 Another commenter warned: “It might be the Radio Demon. Please warn your boss, Moxxie.”

 The grumpy imp wasn’t having it. Moxxie posted: “What are you all talking about?! That “horsie” looks nothing similar to the Radio Demon. Your strange obsessions over the Radio Demon worries me, humans.”

 (That’s the fandom for you, Moxxie!!!)

 Another commenter yelled: “Moxxie, what the hell does the horse look like?!”

 Moxxie replied: “I’d rather not talk about it.”

 Blitzo stepped in. “It was because my horse was amazing and beautiful. Moxxie is just being a puss.”

 Moxxie grumbled and typed: “I disagree, sir. Just keep that thing away from me.”

 Blitzo was offended: “She has a name, Mox!”

 Moxxie: “Sir, I can’t keep up with all the nonsensical names you keep giving it! What even is it right now?!”

 Blitzo: “Her name is Sandal! She is just very fond of getting her names.”

 Stolas added: “This is sweet. I’d really love to meet your horse friend someday.”

 Moxxie had a bad gut feeling inside him. It was the same feeling he had when his boss had brought one of the Furby imp creatures home. They were known to inhibit an old organ that was now in Alastor’s possession “Your Highness, I really don’t think this is a good idea.”

  Bitzo then took a selfie of himself with iced coffee in his hand. Behind him, an imp wearing a gray mask was seen standing with a knife over another imp on the ground. Blitzo posted: “Just got coffee and I was taking a selfie when this guy photobombed my picture. Not cool. My horse (renamed to Glove) is down the street. Waiting for her right now.”

 Stolas agreeed: “Some people are so inconsiderate.”

 Someone asked: “How does the coffee taste?” Blitzo replied with “Gooood.”

 Somebody else asked: “Why does this look like Moxxie killing Millie?”

 Moxxie fumed as he responded: “What the fuck is wrong with you humans?! Why would I ever hurt Millie? You humans are disgusting.”

 Several hours pass by. A concerned and confused Stolas held his white rotary phone with little wings on it in his hand. He posted: “Blitzo didn’t answer for our scheduled call. I suppose I’ll try again tomorrow.”

 The next day passed. Stolas stared forlornly at his rotary phone. He posted: “Tried calling Blitzo again. His receptionist said he hasn’t been in today but she’d have him call me back (I don’t think she will). Via is mad at me. This is a terrible day…”

 Someone asked, “Why is Via angry?”

 Stolas responded: “Via is angry with me because I wouldn’t let her go to a concert without supervision.”

 Moxxie later posted a picture of himself in his room by closed blinds. He had a sad, far-away look on his face, a contrast to his usually grumpy demeanor. He posted: “I enjoyed how peaceful it has been as of late. But this is just awfully quiet…Not that I care, but has anyone seen the smooth brain noise maker that is my boss?”

 Stolas texted Moxxie: “He hasn’t been there at all?!”

 Moxxie said: “No, Your Highness. I haven’t seen him around since he went out to get coffee.”

 Stolas: “Have you contacted his daughter?”

 Moxxie: “Well, yes, but she keeps ignoring me.”

 Stolas texted Moxxie, Millie and Loona: “Has Blitzo been home? Is he alright?”

 Loona: “He’s not on his couch, so no. I don’t know man, maybe he found horses outside, ran after them and got lost…”

 Angel Dust came in to the conversation as well. “Man, mystery shows are hitting real now.”

 Loona posted a picture of an empty couch with a pink pillow on it. She said: “He’s not home yet, I thought he’d be back by now.”

 Stolas: “We’ll find him.”

 Loona: “He’d better have a good fucking excuse.”

 Moxxie: “For once, I agree with you, Loona.”

 Stolas later held up a flier of Blitzo flipping the bird. On the top, the flier read, “Have you seen me? Goes by Blitzo, the “o” is silent.”

 Stolas: “Had these made. Will be giving them to Moxxie, so Blitzo’s associates can put them up around the city. If anyone knows anything, please call I.M.P.”

 Cherri Bomb offered words of encouragement. “I’m sure that little guy is around somewhere, Your Majesty. He’ll show up eventually!”

 Moxxie to Stolas: “We will do everything we can to find that idiot, Your Highness.”

 Stolas to Moxxie: “Moxxie, I wish I could help you, aside from making these posters.”

 Moxxie to Stolas: “Much appreciated for the posters, Your Highness.”

 Angel Dust: “Aye, keep looking feathas. Hell ain’t too big a place ta miss the guy with horns that big.”

 More theories were posted:

 “Maybe he was taken by his horse or furby.”

 “Loona, I don’t think Blitzo has an excuse, I think he was kidnapped.”

 “It’s either the horse or the dude stabbing in the background.”

 “Don’t worry, he’ll be fine. His horse is taking care of him.”

   Meanwhile, in a dark hideout…

 Blitzo’s yellow eyes were wide as saucers as he sat terrified on what appeared to be a green floor with missing tiles. A head of an imp rested in the background. He seemed to have been kidnapped by a gang of imps, perhaps jealous of I.M.P. and looking for money.

 Blitzo: “Ok those guys finally left me alone so I could turn on my phone. You wouldn’t believe what I had to do to keep my phone. (RIP my third burner phone). Anyways, everything is fine. I wanted to get on this Voxtagram (Vox controls all technology and media websites). Because if I tried texting everyone, it’d take too long and calling would alert the dumbass kidnapper. Can someone come pick me up before they try to kill me?”

 Stolas bellowed at the top of his lungs: “Blitzy! Where are you?!”

 Blitzo responded: “I don’t know. Smells bad, though. I’ll get out, just ask my horse to come get me, please.”

 Moxxie was terrified too: “Sir, where in the living Hell are you?! Are you hurt?!”

 Blitzo instead yelled and typed in all caps: “Send horse!”

 Angel Dust typed the emoji for wide eyes.

 The next picture showed a blurred Stolas rushing forward. Stolas could do nothing but type in gibberish in all caps.

 Blitzo: “I don’t know where I am, Stolas! Just send my horsie!”

 Stola began to panic. “I don’t know how to send for your horse! That is why you needed to introduce us!”

 Crash!

 One of the walls concealing Blitzo in darkness burst open, sending bricks and dust everywhere. Blitzo squinted as a circle of light shone into the space. A figure stepped through the hole on all fours, tall and majestic. Blitzo took one look at the savior creature and raced toward it, happy tears falling from his face. The energy radiating from the horse was beyond anything found in Hell…or anywhere else for that matter.

 It was a tall shadowy horse with a skeletal black body, reminiscent of a thestral or a nightmare horse from legends. The hooves were pointed and curved, shaped like miniature weapons. The horse’s mane and tail flowed long and black, outlined in a red aura. The horse’s neck was long and thin as was the head. Its eyes glowed teal and white, giving off an ethereal feel. And although there was static surrounding the horse, it didn’t have the malevolence associated with Alastor and his minions.

 Did this creature decide to shapeshift around Blitzo to watch over him?

 The horse spoke to Blitzo telepathically, her voice that of a human female laced with static. At the same time, the voice commanded divine respect.

 “I am SpindleHorse. You are safe now, Blitzo. Let us be off.”

 SpindleHorse had indeed, broken the (fourth) wall.

 Without hesitation, Blitzo climbed up on the horse’s bony back and with graceful gallops, the horse vanished into the shadows. Blitzo grinned like a little kid as the horse speed down the streets, enjoying the bumpy ride.

 Blitzo ecstatically typed his next post: “Rescue! I told you all my horse would come get me! Spindle broke the wall down! She said I could post the picture. She’s giving me a ride home. I can’t wait to see everyone!”

 Loona, Millie, Moxxie and Stolas cried with joy and relief. For although Blitzo could be a childish annoying asshole, he was still a dear member of their family.

  Loona posted first: “Thank Satan you’re alright! Cuz I…”

 Loona paused, trying to defuse her inner feelings…

 “…because we’re out of food! I need you to go grocery shopping, that’s the only reason I’m relieved. The only reason.”

 Underneath the meth, drinks and her short temper, the hellhound secretary was relieved her adopted father was safe. Life was simply too lonely without the group of imps around.

 Millie beamed. She, of course, was very happy that her boss was safe and sound. Stolas as well, was overjoyed that his lover was unhurt. Even Moxxie, who constantly chided Blitzo’s mannerisms, had a soft spot for his boss.

  Stolas was overjoyed. “Oh thank goodness! I’m coming over, immediately!”

 Moxxie said: “I still don’t want to get close to her but…thank you, Spindle.”

 Stolas rushed over as Blitzo dismounted the horse in front of the palace. The imp was soon locked in a feathery embrace. Stolas let out some hoots and draped his feathery wings over him.  

 “Blitzy, you’re alright! Oh I was worried sick. Missed you so, so much!”

 “Arugh, heh, heh, okay, Stolas, I missed you too…” He was struggling for breath. “You can…fuck…let go now.”

 Stolas did before opening his beak in a smile. “Did you say you want to fuck?”

 “No, not now!” Blitzo exclaimed, brushing wrinkles off his dark blue navy suit. “I gotta rest then get back to work.”

 “I completely understand. I’ll take you home right away!”

 Stolas traced a glowing yellow symbol in front of him and a flaming portal appeared, leading back to the I.M.P. office. Blitzo stepped through it before turning around.

 “Thank you…Stolas. For sending me my horse and all.”

 “Of course,” Stolas replied. “I hope I can meet her sometime. If you need anything, please don’t hesitate to call me. And I mean anything.”

 “Will do.”

 Stolas closed the portal and posted a picture of him and Blitzo hugging.

 Stolas exclaimed in all caps, “Blitzo is safe and sound! Thank you, Spindle!”

 Moxxie typed a message to his boss: “Sir, please be more careful. The next time you go out to get coffee, take your horse with you. I will put a slight increase to the horse budget for the time being. Please rest up for today.”

  Blitzo found himself in the middle of a group hug, surrounded by Loona, Moxxie and Millie. Millie squealed happily as she hugged him. “I’m so glad you’re okay, sir!” she said. “Mox and I were very worried.”

 “You guys do know that I was only gone for like a day, right?” Blitzo asked, rolling his eyes. Tears fell from his eyes despite himself.

 “Still…that doesn’t exclude the fact that…we may have missed you a bit,” Moxxie replied. Loona uncharacteristically enough gave Blitzo a small kiss on his forehead with her tongue. For a moment, Loona was smiling and wagging her tail like a happy puppy reunited with her owner. Then, all too soon, she separated herself from him, her tough demeanor returning. “Yeah, you’re fine, good. Now I really need some fucking food and drinks right now.”

 Millie was the last one to let go of Blitzo. “If you need anything or want something done, we’ll be happy to get to it. Need anything? Iced coffee? A horse song? Two new human heads?”

 Blitzo had to chuckle. “Thanks Millie, but I’m fine. Let’s get to work everyone.”

 Thus, the ordinary day at I.M.P. continued on.

 Blitzo then posted a picture of a fork in a cup of ramen noodles with an egg in it.

 Blitzo said, “Everyone was bugging me today. It was kind of nice. Everything finally calmed down, so I had some 3 AM noodles.”

 Stolas added: “Don’t hesitate to call if you need anything!”

 Moxxie chided: “Cup of noodles isn’t healthy for you, sir. Next time, if you want to consume some 3 AM noodles, I will make some just for you.”

 Blitzo sighed. “I don’t need to be babied, Mox. Don’t worry about me. For real, I like noodles in a cup, though.”

 Moxxie decided to let him enjoy his noodles.

 Moxxie then had an idea. He did something that he would normally never do. Millie had said it was a great idea and that Blitzo would love it. Moxxie placed a gift on Blitzo’s desk the next day. It was a bag of horse shaped pasta noodles colored yellow, green and pink. On it was a note: “Feel better soon! P.S. please stop consuming junk food in the middle of the night.” From Moxxie and Millie.

Moxxie posted: “About to deliver this homemade pasta to my boss. Millie and I made this so my boss wouldn’t consume extremely unhealthy things in the middle of the night. Recipe on VoxTube. Horse shaped pasta mold is a Satan send.”

 Blitzo responded: “Oh I love this, but I still wanna eat ramen at 3 AM.”

 Moxxie replied: “What you had was obviously a cup of noodles and that is extremely bad for your body. Do you have any idea what they put in those? For crying out loud, please refrain from eating such cheap and unhealthy things.”

  The next post showed Blitzo under a blanket getting ready for bed. His head was just in front of his pink pillow on the couch. A plushie of Spirit the horse lay next to him.

 Blitzo posted: “Gonna stay in bed today. Got to lay low since everyone wants to talk to me. You guys knew I’d be fine.”

 Stolas mentioned, “We were just worried. I’ll give you some space for a while. Rest all you can. Pet your horse. I’ll talk to you at a later date.”

 Blitzo smiled and picked up a little brown horse figure beside him. “I also found my little horsie that looks like my horse! I wonder where she’s been…”

 The next day, Blitzo posted a selfie of him in the woods on Earth. Two raccoons were fighting over food from behind him.

 Blitzo: “Went to my job today and took this picture in the living world!”

 Someone asked, “Yo, are those two raccoons fighting back there?”

 Blitzo replied: “It’s not about them. This is all about me!”

 Later that night, back in his room, Blitzo was woken up by a soothing voice.

 “Blitz…”

 Blitzo bolted up from the couch and stood upon shaking legs.

 “Spindle!”

 It was Spindle the horse. The air around her briefly warped and morphed into little shapes. Bits of other worlds faded in and out, even showing a slice of Earth before fizzling out.

 “Is everything alright?”

 “Yes,” she responded. “I woke you up to say my goodbye.”

 Blitzo was stunned. “Y-you’re leaving?”

 “My work here is done,” she said. “I did my part to keep you safe. Now I must ensure that others are safe as well. I have other worlds to attend to as well: Heaven, Earth, Zoophobia…”

 “Wait, zoo what?”

 “Nothing of concern.” Her voice mixed with an eerie sounding neigh of dismissal. Her red aura illuminated the darkness. “Thank you for the iced coffee, by the way, it was tasty.”

 Blitzo couldn’t stop the tears falling from his eyes. This regal marvelous creature had saved his life and bonded with him for many months. She was like the friend he had never had…perhaps almost like a motherly figure.

 The horse nuzzled close to him, their foreheads touching. Blitzo’s hand cupped under her long chin while a black tendril tenderly touched his shoulder.

 “We will meet again, soon. Whether in this life or the next. Farewell for now.”

“Goodbye, Spindle. Thank you for everything.”

 Spindle stepped back, turned around and disappeared through a hole of white light. Then, in the blink of an eye, it was dark once more.

 The other characters briefly got to see Spindle as well. As she trot noiselessly against the asphalt, everyone stared to look, almost transfixed. Even the Radio Demon stopped what he was doing and stood respectfully. There was admiration for SpindleHorse’s immense power in his red eyes. Niffty jumped for joy next to Charlie whose eyes were shining with happiness.

 “Please come back again!” she called out. “The Happy Hotel welcomes all.”

  In a rare moment, Husk and Vaggie had genuine smiles on their faces, as if staring at the horse long enough would make their problems go away.

 “Thank you, Spindle!” called Angel Dust with several waves of his many hands. “You saved that imp’s life.”

 “Much appreciated,” Cherri Bomb added. “Catch ya later!” The characters waved one by one.

 SpindleHorse neighed and reared up on two hooves as static filled the air. The horse vanished through another white portal in static before all was quiet and normal once more.

  Blitzo posted a picture of him and his horse saying goodbye. “My horse woke me up in the middle of the night saying she had to go because she repaid me by saving me. I got her coffee, and she saved me, so we’re even. One last picture together before she has to go. She says the name is Spindle, so it stays.”

 Stolas knew that the goodbye was bittersweet for Blitzo. He tried to comfort his friend. “I’m so sorry Blitzo…Perhaps someday, she’ll return and visit. You were always good to her.”

 Stolas sent a picture of himself posing seductively with his grey fluffy chest exposed. Another showed Stolas displaying his butt and dark gray tail features in front of the camera. “Maybe these will cheer you up!”

 “Stolas, stop sending me nudes when I’m thinking about my horse!” Blitzo responded in sudden annoyance.

 Stolas chuckled a bit. “Sorry, I thought they would get your mind off things!”

 Even Loona was feeling the melancholy in the air. It was like everyone was suddenly feeling an unexplained connection to the elusive equine. “She will be missed…”

 “Just like the end of Spirit,” said a commentator, recalling when Spirit had reunited with his mother and galloped freely in the vast meadow.

 “You get me,” Blitzo responded, pleased to have someone else share their love of the classic film.

 Moxxie, too, couldn’t escape the strange feeling. “Can’t believe I’m saying this, but I am going to miss her. I do wish she has a good horse life.”

 “Thank you, SpindleHorse!” Millie added. “We love you and we miss you!”

 Blitzo then posted, almost to himself: “You only know what you have when it goes.”

 Stolas then posted his drawing of Blitzo smiling at the tall skeletal horse.

 Stolas said, “Wanted to make something Blitzo may like while he’s recovering. I’ll just drop it off later. Maybe have it framed if he’d like…” He added, “I’m proud of this one.”

 But Blitzo, ever the stubborn one, bluntly said, “My horse doesn’t look like that.”

 “Oh…”

 Stolas was taken aback, hurt. There was no reason for him to be rude like that, even if the drawing wasn’t the same as the real horse. Stolas decided to give the imp some space.

 Then he thought about his daughter. Maybe Octavia might not be mad at him like she was before. Sure, she wanted to go to Lilith’s Resist rock concert playing at Loo-Loo World for a while, but overprotective Stolas wasn’t going to allow it. There she was, a typical diva teenager who didn’t want her goofy dad to follow her everywhere.

 “Just another day in Hell,” thought Stolas with a sigh.

Meanwhile in a parallel universe...

Alastor eventually captures Blitzo and conjures his next plan:

 -Interrogate Blitzo about I.M.P.

-Have Blitzo led the way to I.M.P.

-Retrieve the book to gain access to the human world

-Offer Blitzo an opportunity to achieve musical theater dreams.

- Persuade Blitzo and other imps to make deals (songs almost always work!)

-If deal works, their souls will be mine

-Profit off I.M.P. and take over the company, thus claim Imp City as territory

-Enter human world and cause more chaos

-More souls = larger army and greater influence

-(Visit New Orleans and mom’s grave again.)

-Eventually take over both worlds for endless entertainment

-Figure out what this pandemic is in living world

[jesus-in-a-life-boat]

Queen Survey Results

The results are finally here!!! They took forever to summarize, but I’m finally done. Some of them were obvious, some were rather surprising. Enjoy!

Favourite member

This one was interesting. The results kept changing drastically over the week and I became curious myself. But the final winner of our hearts is...

.

.

.

Roger Taylor

With 213 votes!!!

Next were John (170 votes), Brian (169 votes) and Freddie (154 votes). 25 voters couldn’t choose between these four amazing humans and went with “I don’t know”.

With mind-blowing drumming skills, a sharp wit and the ear-piercing voice, Roger sure is a beloved man. And that’s without mentioning his good looks: beautiful like an angel, yet sexy like a demon. Not half bad.

Favourite album

🏆A Night at the Opera: 182 votes

🏆🏆Sheer Heart Attack: 111 votes

🏆🏆🏆A Day at the Races: 85 votes

News of the World: 82 votes

Queen II: 69 votes

The Game: 36 votes

Jazz: 35 votes

Hot Space: 34 votes

The Works: 31 votes

Queen: 22 votes

Innuendo: 20 votes

A Kind of Magic: 11 votes

The Miracle: 10 votes

Made In Heaven: 3 votes

Favourite writer

All four members of Queen are gifted writers that created brilliant and iconic masterpieces. However, one member stood out and won with 278 votes. The winner is...

.

.

.

FREDDIE FUCKIN’ MERCURY

Ah, yes. Such moving and well-phrased words.

In all seriousness, Freddie’s writing had an insanely impressive range: from the operatic and powerful ballad “Bohemian Rhapsody” to the playful and romantic tune “Crazy Little Thing Called Love”, Freddie sure shows talent. Not every musician can take three different songs and turn them into one iconic bop.

Brian is the runner-up with 225 votes for his emotional and space-themed songs we all know and love.

John is in 3rd place with 115 votes. Us Queen fans love both his disco tunes and his rock tracks. The only thing that held him back from defeating Brian was probably “I’m happy at home”.

Meanwhile, Roger suffers a dramatic defeat with only 35 votes. I suppose “I’m in Love With My Car” backfired big time.

76 voters remain undecided. Can you blame them?

BoRhap view count

Once: 55 votes

Twice: 106 votes

Three times: 105 votes

Four times: 81 votes

Five times: 61 votes

6 times or more: 280 votes

I don’t know: 43 votes

Fanfiction

Fanfics are very common among Queen fans. How common? Let’s see:

I read fanfics: 607 votes

I don’t read fanfics: 124

Well, looks like the writers on Tumblr have a pretty large crowd. Just remember to reblog those fics, alright? Break the unfair like-reblog ratio and show writers respect!

LGBT+

The queer community makes a big portion of the Tumblr community. How big of a portion do they make of the Queen community?

394 voters are LGBT+. Happy pride month, folks!!!

220 voters are straight. Hello there!

117 voters are questioning their sexuality or gender. You are valid and we love you.

🏳️‍🌈

BoRhap rating

The film “Bohemian Rhapsody” was a huge success that drew people from every country and age to the Queen fandom. But it also causes many conflicts and controversies. What do Queen fans think on a scale of 1 (bad) to 10 (good)?

1: 2 votes

2: 3 votes

3: 6 votes

4: 31 votes

5: 40 votes

6: 75 votes

7: 144 votes

8: 186 votes

9: 122 votes

10: 122 votes

On an average, the movie scored 7.6 out of 10.

Freddie’s sexuality

Freddie’s sexuality is a sensitive and controversial topic that Queen fans argue about to this day. I have gathered the various claims and opinions into this:

Gay: 352 votes

Bisexual: 105 votes

I don’t know: 51 votes

I don’t care: 100 votes

I don’t know OR care: 123 votes

Hot space

Queen’s 1982 disco album “Hot Space” received both great and horrible reviews. What do we think about it?

“Hot Space” slaps: 575 votes

“Hot Space” sucks: 103 votes

“Hot Sapce” had a couple of good songs, but I don’t like it that much: 53 votes

Hight

Are you over or under 1.50 meters (5 feet)?

Over: 677 votes

Under: 54 votes

John’s nickname

Brian spells it “Deacy”, Roger spells it “Deaky” - how do you spell it?

Deaky: 546 votes

Deacy: 146

Both: 24 votes

Other answers:

Deacky

Diqi

Dicky

Jihn Richid Diqin (who hurt you?)

Deackqy

Deackyi

D-key

DiScO dEaKy

Favorite song

This question took hours and hours to summarize, but here are the fandom’s top 3 Queen songs:

3rd place:

Liar

I guess you guys love it so much, you can listen to it... ALL DAY LONG!!!

2nd place:

39

This lovely, emotional tune by Brian May is one of the fandom’s favorite songs. YEE-HAW!!!

And in 1st place...

.

.

.

Somebody To Love

“Somebody To Love” is an absolute masterpiece: beautiful harmonies, perfectly-fitting guitar solo, Freddie’s impressive voice, John’s creative bass line and the relatable lyrics make it one of their most popular songs.

Best bass

John Deacon composed many iconic bass lines that you can recognize right away. Here are the three best bass lines:

Another One Bites the Dust

Dragon Attack

Under Pressure

Best guitar solo

Brian may is a guitar genius. He has a one-of-a-kind guitar, an engineer’s mind and raw talent. You voted for many different songs, but here are the best Brian solos:

Don’t Stop Me Now

Brighton Rock (of course!)

Bohemian Rhapsody

Best back vocals

Queen are known for their epic harmonies. They make their songs powerful and emotional. Three songs in particular show this incredible feature.

Somebody To Love

In the Lap of the Gods (AAAAAAAAAAA)

Bohemian Rhapsody

Roger’s best falsettos (natural range, whatever. You know what I mean!)

As I mentioned before, Roger has a beautiful, high-pitched voice. His screams are an important part of many Queen songs. Which songs has Roger’s best “falsettos”?

In the Lap of the Gods

Bohemian Rhapsody

My Fairy King

Best concert

Queen’s concerts are a crazy sight to the eyes and a musical experience to the ears. Even today, Queen and Adam Lambert shock and entertain the world with their spectacular shows. Which Queen concert would totally rock you?

3rd place...

Live @ the Rainbow (1974)

2nd place...

Wembley stadium (1986)

And in 1st place...

.

.

.

Rock Montreal (1981)

Age

We have friends from age 13 to 65, but the average Queen fan is 22.2 years old.

Content

The Queen fandom offers many ways to celebrate and enjoy both the music and the musicians. How much do you contribute to the fandom?

I don’t make content: 361 votes

Art: 109 votes

Music edits: 18 votes

Photo edits: 103 votes

GIFs: 20 votes

Memes: 42 votes

Fanfics: 239 votes

Covers: 34 votes

Also:

Moodboards

Rare videos\photos

Video edits

Video montages

Collages

Wallpapers

Playlists

Headcanons

3D models

Me: Shitposting is not content.

That one person: I disagree with your exclusion.

Me:

That’s all, folks! This was super fun, I really enjoyed it. What do you think? Let me know in the comments. Thanks again for your cooperation!

[heyyyharry]

My Girl Series: Chapter 5 - Somebody Else

…in which, once upon a time, there was a girl and a boy, and no one else.

Series description: Y/N falls in love with the older boy next door who doesn’t feel the same, years later they meet again at a funeral.

AU: actor!harry, older!harry, younger!y/n; (4-year age gap)

Chapter 4: Thumper The Rabbit - Harry tries to mend the past, but Y/N wants to let it go.

wattpad link

‘Somebody Else’ bathroom version, you’re welcome

.

"Once upon a time, there was a boy and a girl, and no one else..."

Those hot summer days had turned the little town called Holmes Chapel into a heated up oven. Everyone would rather stay indoors where there were fans and air-conditioners, yet the two kids Harry and Y/N refused to abandon their treehouse even for a day.

It was a blazing Wednesday afternoon. In the crooked treehouse, the little girl's voice was a lullaby, with the help of soft summer breezes through the branches, sending the 14-year-old into dreamland. With his eyelids fluttering, Harry heard her say, "don't fall asleep."

"I'm not." He tried to open his eyes and look at her.

"Liar." She scoffed. "Is my story boring to you?"

The little girl closed the pink notebook, looking a bit offended as she crossed her arms.

"No," Harry told her as he folded his arms behind his head. "But I want to hear the good stuff, like sword fights or gun battles or something."

"It's only chapter one. I haven't introduced all characters yet."

The boy thought for two seconds before he asked, "I thought there were just the two of them and no one else?"

"Well, it's just a way of saying. They are best friends, so in their eyes they are the only two people in the world." She furrowed her eyebrows and shook her head at him in disappointment. 

"Is the girl you?"

She nodded.

"Is the boy me?"

"No, it's a very handsome guy."

"Fine." Harry huffed as he turned his eyes back to the ceiling and told her to carry on. He couldn't see that smile on her face when she resumed reading the story she'd worked so hard on. Even if she'd lied and said it wasn't true, the boy was Harry of course.

.

.

.

Y/N quickly closed the pink notebook on her lap when her phone started to ring. The call was from her best friend Celine, the one Y/N had been expecting to hear from in almost two weeks. Both Celine and Amala had been so busy with their part-time jobs and final exams so Y/N couldn't describe how elated she was to finally receive that phone call.

"Cece, I miss you! How's Boston?"

"Boring as usual. I'm at work right now but I missed you so much. How are you, baby?"

Y/N scanned her eyes around her messy bedroom, at all the papers and clothes lying everywhere on the chair, table, and floor. She was kind of hopeless if she was honest.

"I'm struggling with my work in process. I'm rereading my old stories to find inspiration." She looked at the time and realized she'd been sitting in front of her laptop for an hour now without actually writing anything. Sighing, she went on, "I miss my imagination back then. I used to be so creative."

"Adulthood kills creativity."

"True." She agreed, rolling her eyes. "How's Amala?"

"She's doing great. Maybe we'll video call you tomorrow night. We both missed you lots and lots!" The next thing Celine said was what Y/N had been expecting."Hey, how's it going with the hot photographer?"

"You know." The girl clicked her tongue. "We're just...flirting back and forth."

"Good! Take things slow, but please let yourself have some fun like a normal 20-year-old."

Celine’s advice put a smile on her best friend's face as the girl nodded her head, and soon remembered they were talking on the phone and she couldn't be seen.

"Got it," she said, biting her bottom lip.

"When are you seeing him again?"

"Tonight. He invited me to his exhibition."

"I thought you said he was taking photos for fun."

"That's what I thought! But it turned out he was actually famous, like he shoots for magazine covers and shit. That's so intimidating."

"That's hot! If I weren't gay and taken and your friend, I would eat him up already."

Both girls guffawed at Celine’s remark.

"Shit, I've got to go now! Any more update?"

The first thing that came to Y/N's mind when she heard the word 'update' was actually Harry. She hadn't told her two best friends about them being friends again yet, because those girls had known too much about her history with Harry.

Though a lot had changed in the last two years, she didn't think they wouldn't just believe her friendship with Harry had improved so much just from hearing the words from her mouth. So she decided to keep him as a secret and wait until she saw them in person to break the news. It'd be more convincing if they could see for themselves how much Harry had changed.

"Nope," Y/N lied. "I think I've told you everything, Isaac, my father's engagement..."

As the silence sank in, she heard her best friend exhale. Celine had basically grown up with her and known her father for almost eleven years now, so that news had also shocked the girl a lot. She didn't know the man well to despise him, yet the pain he'd caused to Y/N made it impossible for her to even respect him like she used to.

"I'll call you tomorrow okay?" Celine said, sounding cheerful again all of a sudden, probably to distract her friend from thinking about her father. "Have fun tonight! I'll be refreshing your insta feed!"

"Oh, God!" Y/N tossed her head back, laughing hard. "Bye! Love you!"

"Love you, too!" And just like that, Celine ended the call.

.

.

.

"So I just ran into Daniel Bullard from Vogue Italy. He was obsessed with your works and he told me—"

As his manager kept on rambling about another magazine cover deal, Isaac failed to focus on what this man thought was important. He couldn't stop the words from going into one ear and out from another while scanning his eyes around the crowded room.

He knew this had been his biggest photography exhibition by far, and he was supposed to be excited that there were many big names here tonight. However, he felt so incomplete that the one person he hoped to see most wasn't there.

Harry wasn't there.

He'd told Harry about this exhibition before anyone else, and Harry had never missed a single special event in his life ever since they became friends. So if Harry decided not to show up, Isaac knew it wasn't because he'd forgotten, it was because of Y/N.

"Isey!" The nickname got the photographer to turn his head, and spotted the cheerful Irish man waving at him from across the room.

"Hey, Lee," he interrupted his manager, who was still talking. "I'm gonna go say hi to Niall, if that's alright."

The Asian man sighed as he realized Isaac hadn't heard a single word he'd said. So he just gave up and told his client to do whatever he wanted. "Meanwhile, I'll be over there, praising you to Daniel Bullard."

"Thanks, Lee." Isaac patted the man on the shoulder and headed towards his friend.

They pulled each other into a tight hug because it'd been nearly four months since the last time they saw one another in person.

"You bastard, why didn't you tell me you were back in London?" Isaac asked, one hand on the other guy's shoulder, smiling widely.

"I wanted to surprise you. This exhibition is amazing by the way! You should shoot my next album cover!"

Niall's suggestion made the blond chuckle. "Only if I got half the profit of every single album you sell."

"Hey, I'm your friend!"

"You made Harry and I buy tickets to your concert, you dick," Isaac exclaimed, hands on his hips as both of them cracked up at the good memories with all three of them together.

Harry, Niall and Isaac had been close friends since they shared a dorm room back in university. Now at twenty-four, they had all become famous and got the lives they'd always wanted, living their dreams. The only thing that hadn't changed was their friendship, so Isaac hoped it would just remain this way.

"Speaking of Harold, where's he?" Niall looked around, squinting his blue eyes to search for that familiar curly head. "Where's the other musketeer?"

Isaac shrugged, not knowing what to say but the truth, "maybe he won't even come."

"Why? Did something happen between you two while I was gone?"

"No."

"Fucking liar. I'll ask Harry then." Niall raised an eyebrow, staring at Isaac and waiting for him to say something, but the guy simply gave him a shrug, lips pressed into a faint smile as he let the awkward silence continue. Niall couldn't take it anymore. He lowered his volume to make sure only his friend could hear what he was about to say.

"Don't tell me he's still upset about the Ruby thing."

"Actually, he handled it better than I thought," said Isaac. "But dude, I almost flew to L.A to punch you for sending us that article about Ruby's engagement. He blocked her on social media for a fucking reason."

"Sorry, sorry, I was just really shocked!" Niall held up his hands like a criminal surrendering to a cop. "I just wanted him to know she's a terrible person."

"I think he knows, but whether he believes it or not depends on himself, not you and I." Isaac shook his head.

Niall opened his mouth to say something else, yet got cut off immediately by his friend's notification. Isaac excused himself and took out his phone to read the text, which instantly got him beaming.

⌲ Smiley: I'm outside. Should I just walk in?

He quickly typed back:

⌲ Yes, just tell them your name. You'll see me as soon as you enter. :)

"Niall," said the blond, beaming as he sent that text. "I cannot wait to introduce you to someone."

"Ooh, lemme guess, it's..." Niall paused a bit to think and then shouted out, "Harold!"

Isaac was very confused, at first he thought his friend was joking, but then he heard that all-too-familiar voice from right behind him saying hello. He turned around, and there he found Harry, dressed in a nice suit with his hair pushed back, making his way to them.

The green-eyed man put on a grin as he gave Niall a hug, then Isaac too. He apologized for being late and congratulated his best friend on this exhibition, like their argument the other night about Y/N had never happened. Isaac didn't know how long it would last, but at the moment he couldn't be any happier.

"I'm glad you're here, H," said the blond, who now started to look more like the host of his own event with that elation on his face. Now that the three of them were together again, they could—

"Hey, guys!"

That female voice caused both Isaac and Harry to turn to the main entrance. Two big smiles appeared on both handsome faces as they called out, at the same time,

"Bambi!" / "Smiley!"

Harry looked at Isaac, who looked at Harry, and the men heard Niall mumble "awkward..." under his breath but he wasn't wrong. It was truly awkward for both of them, and maybe for Y/N too.

"Smiley?" Harry furrowed his eyebrows, mouth agape, staring at the girl who shrugged and flashed him a smile. He was hoping the nickname his friend had just shouted out wasn't meant for his Bambi, but as she hugged Isaac and couldn't stop smiling at him, Harry knew it couldn't be anyone else.

Pulling away from Isaac, Y/N turned to Harry and hugged him as well. He didn't know if she noticed, but he held her a bit tighter than he normally would, and when they broke apart, he told her she looked beautiful in the dark blue dress she was wearing.

"Thanks. This thing is two years old already." She looked down and giggled, and for a short second there Harry almost forgot Niall and Isaac were with them.

"Niall, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is—"

"Niall Horan!" Y/N interrupted Isaac, shaking Niall's hand enthusiastically. "I love your music!"

"I like her already." Niall chuckled, eyes on his two best friends. "Which one of you assholes is her boyfriend?"

Both men were left dumbfounded by that one question, but the person who answered it wasn't one of them.

"Neither. We're just friends," Y/N said, red lips curved into a smile, and the satisfaction on Harry's face could not be more obvious.

"So every random person has a nickname for you then?" Niall raised an eyebrow though his attempt to lighten up the mood had his two friends sighing in frustration. "Maybe I should give you a nickname as well."

"Niall, don't even."

"Shut up, Harold, lemme think." Niall held up his hand as he shushed the other brunette.

"In the meantime..." Isaac trailed off, shaking his head at Niall, who was still trying to come up with another nickname for the girl he'd just met. But the photographer never got his chance to finish as his manager Lee appeared out of nowhere and grabbed him by the arm.

"Where's the girl?" Asked the manager, leaving all four people confused.

It took Isaac a second to remember and realize what that meant. So he quickly pointed to Y/N and said that she was the girl.

"Good, good." Lee nodded quickly, holding both Isaac's and Y/N's hand as he laughed. "Blair and Cyrus Archer wanted to see you both."

"The Archers? The twins who shoot for Vanity Fair?" Y/N asked and everyone looked at her in shock, all wondering why she had that knowledge. Shyly, she told them she'd done a bit of research about the industry before she came, so she wouldn't end up looking like a fool.

"Oh, she's smart too! How great!" Lee squealed in excitement as he squeezed her hand. "They are literally obsessed with that shot of you, darling."

"Wait, what shot?" Harry finally spoke up as it seemed like he was the only one there who hadn't seen whatever Lee was talking about. Confused, he quickly followed everyone to another room.

And as soon as he entered, one particular exhibition immediately caught his eyes. It was a portrait of his Bambi. Though the shot was black and white, that beautiful smile on her lovely face was all the colors it needed to radiate joy all across the room.

Harry stood transfixed in shock and disbelief as he heard Y/N whisper to Isaac, "I can't believe you picked that one."

He then replied, "your smile is the brightest in that one."

"Harold?" Niall nudged Harry to pull his friend back down to Earth, but the green-eyed brunette never got his chance to comment on the artwork. Lee jumped right into his mouth, saying he needed to borrow Y/N and Isaac for a moment.

"Sorry boys, networking is key!" said the man as he grabbed the startled pair, pulling them with him towards the twin sisters waiting by the portrait.

Harry couldn't be there much longer. Even though he blamed the overcrowding room for his annoyance, he knew all those people didn't bother him half as much as the happy two standing over there.

"So that's what you two have been hiding from me?" Niall held back Harry's arm as he intended to walk out.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"The girl. Smiley?"

"Bambi." Harry knew Niall made that mistake on purpose to test his reaction, yet he still got irritated, probably because of the nickname alone. "I'll go get a drink, you coming?"

"Then you'll tell me what happened?"

The actor gave his friend a smile, but then brutally killed off Niall's hope with his answer. "In your dreams."

.

.

.

The love song blasting from the loud speaker really got on Harry's nerves, as he looked around at those happy couples dancing and making out with each other. It wasn't even Valentine's Day yet and he'd already felt like the loneliest person in a room.

The after party at Lee's house was massive, and many of the guests were important people in the entertainment industry. Harry swore he knew most of them and they knew him. Still there he was, standing in the corner with a drink in his hand and himself as his own company, like a geek at senior prom.

Across the room, Niall was flirting with a girl Harry had never met before. Isaac and Y/N were nowhere to be seen, and Harry didn't want to guess what they could be doing right now. As if seeing them together wasn't awful enough.

The actor quickly emptied the glass in his hand and laid it down on the table by his side. Fuck, he thought, I really need another drink.

"Well, isn't this the famous Harry Styles?!"

Harry could've broken his neck from turning his head so fast to the sound of that voice.

There she was, his Bambi, walking towards him with a cheeky smile and asked him why he wasn't dancing like everyone else. He told her half the truth, that he wasn't in the mood to party at the moment without telling her why.

Surprisingly, she didn't ask, and just tugged on his arm as she said, "come dance with me."

It wasn't a question, more like a request, one he couldn't deny. So he let her pull him along to the center of the room to join the dancing crowd, thinking about how they used to dance with each other when they were kids; but of course, with them being adults a lot would have changed already.

Under the flashing red and blue lights, Harry couldn't take his eyes of the young woman in front of him. She was swaying to the rhythm of the upbeat song without caring who might be watching her. Her energy fueled him to also let himself loose.

She grabbed his shoulders, pulling him in, their foreheads resting against each other as he finally found the courage to place his hands on her lower back. If anyone was watching them now, they might think they were in love.

"You dance like a grandpa," she teased, raising her voice so he could hear her over the loud music. Harry couldn't help but laugh at her comment.

"Thanks, that's why I act and not dance."

She rolled her eyes playfully, shaking her head as she cracked up.

"Where's Isaac?" He finally asked.

"Oh, he's talking to some people Lee introduced him to."

"Why did he call you Smiley?" The second question had no relation to the previous one, yet Harry couldn't keep second guessing anymore. He assumed the nickname had something to do with the shot of her smiling, but the answer Y/N gave him was beyond his prediction.

"He called me that to remind me to always smile."

Harry nearly lost his balance on his own two feet when he heard those words. Sure Y/N had never been his to begin with, but at that moment, he realized he was losing her.

"Let's be honest, Bambi is a better name." He scoffed and received another smile from the girl.

"Don't you worry," she told him. "I'll always be Bambi."

Though that seemed far from the truth, it was what Harry chose to believe.

"I can't believe the last time we danced together you still had pigtails," he said, beaming at her as he ran his hands through her hair.

"The last time we danced together I still had a crush on you." That response was beyond his prediction but the next thing coming from her mouth put him up short.

"Don't worry, I'm over it."

Harry stopped dancing and so did she, not because she could read his mind, but because she spotted Isaac heading towards them. Harry turned his head just in time his best friend arrived and asked to steal Y/N for a moment.

"Sure. She's all yours," Harry said. Those words had been the hardest to say by far. "I'll see you later, Bambi."

Without waiting for her to reply, he leaned down and kissed her on the cheek to say goodbye. And not until he was walking away from them did Harry realize, he had never kissed her on the cheek before.

It was rather embarrassing to even try to guess her reaction as he headed straight to the bathroom, and he didn't even need to go. He just wanted a place to get away from all those background noises and human interactions, even though those things kept him free from the crazy thoughts inside his head.

The muffled music from outside had changed to Somebody Else by The 1975. And as he washed his hands in the sink, Harry cursed the one who'd made that playlist. Were they trying to narrate his situation at the moment?

I don't want your body But I hate to think about you with somebody else

He needed to get out of there.

"Lee, have you seen Isaac and Y/N?"

The manager excused himself to the guests as he turned to Harry. "They just left together, he told me he was gonna take her home."

Harry thanked Lee, ignoring what the man had to say next and just walked away, pushing his way through the packed room to find the exit. Now that they were both gone he had no reason to be there anymore.

He was just a few steps away from the door when a familiar figure caught his eyes, and for a second there he thought that girl he saw was his Bambi. From behind she surely looked like Y/N, but she was wearing a different outfit.

The girl turned around, sending Harry a smile as soon as she caught him staring. What happened next was very hazy in his memory probably because the alcohol had finally kicked in.

He vaguely remembered approaching the girl and asking her to dance. He remembered them drinking until his head was spinning in circles. He remembered kissing her on the mouth as they called a taxi to go to his place. He remembered taking off her clothes as well as his own. He remembered having sex. But most importantly, he remembered thinking of Y/N the entire time.

And when he crashed down on the bed, sweaty, all out of breath, Harry remembered the feeling of disappointment. The girl said a lot of things to him, yet his ears automatically canceled out all the other sounds apart from his own heartbeats.

As he drifted off, the face of Y/N from earlier as she pulled him close continued to haunt him still.

.

.

.

Y/N giggled as she ran up the stairs with Isaac following right behind her. The lift in the building broke again, so they had to walk five floors to get to her flat, and Y/N would've been so embarrassed if Isaac hadn't already known she was too broke to afford better accommodation.

"Don't be too shocked when you see my room."

"I've been in your room before, love," he said, catching his breath as he took the last step to reach her and gave her a tired smile.

The last time he'd been there was actually on the day they first met. After hanging out together from morning till night, he dropped her off at her place and she invited him in for a cup of tea. That was how they woke up the next morning with him spooning her in her bed, fully clothed of course.

"You were lucky the last time because I'd just cleaned it. I haven't done it again since." She chuckled, pulling out her keys as she opened the door. Then the girl was completely frozen in her spot.

Isaac looked around the tiny living room, it wasn't that bad so he didn't get the shocked expression on her face. It was only when she bent down to pick up a white envelope someone had probably slid through her door gap that he realized the real reason she'd reacted that way.

"Is that a wedding invita—Hey!" He shouted out, reaching for her hands but it was already too late. She'd already torn the envelope to pieces and marched across the room to toss them all in the trash bin. She looked at him, he looked at her, neither said another word, both second-guessing each other's next move.

She knew he wanted to ask her why, but he wasn't sure if what he was wondering would be invasive, so he stayed quiet. Anyway, she was glad he had chosen not to question what she'd done.

"Tea?" She asked with a smile.

.

.

.

"Y/N!"

The way Isaac shouted out her name caused the girl to bat her eyelashes and she finally made it out of her maze of thoughts. The cup of tea she’d made for him had been emptied whereas the one in her hand was still full and had gotten cold.

"What's wrong?" He asked in concern. "You kind of spaced out."

"Nothing. I'm just tired."

Isaac checked the time on his watch and furrowed his eyebrows as he realized how late it'd been.

"I should leave so you can rest."

"Wait!" She stopped him. "We can...We can talk some more...I'm not that tired."

Her reaction made the man laugh as he nodded and shifted a bit to get back to his previous comfortable posture. He looked around the room, at the books and many crumpled up pieces of paper lying all over the floor and on the table between them. It looked like the aftermath of a tornado inside her living room but he didn't have to raise questions for her to give him the answer.

"I'm struggling with my writing."

"Yeah, I figured." He chuckled. "You told me about the book you'd been working on."

"I haven't even edited the first chapter." She rolled her eyes. "But it sucks anyway, so..."

"Can I read it?"

"What?"

"Your first chapter."

"Oh...that...well..." The girl straightened her back, flipping her hair over her shoulders in a nervous manner as she cleared her throat. "I'm sorry but I've never shared my unfinished work with anyone besides my mum and..."

"Harry," Isaac finished the sentence for her, leaving her surprised for a second.

"Yeah." She nodded. "But when it's ready...if it's ready, I'll let you read it."

"I can't wait."

The gentle smile he was giving her had her sitting there with her heart in her mouth. Her anticipation told her he was gonna say something else, so she quickly stole his chance to speak by blurting out, "do you wanna stay tonight?"

"S-Sure." He chuckled, slightly taken aback yet also amused. "If you want me to."

"I want you to," she asserted.

"Okay. Then I'll stay."

.

.

.

Harry woke up in the middle of the night and found himself in his bed with a naked stranger lying by his side. She had her back turned to him so for a split second he imagined it was Y/N though he knew for sure it was not. Y/N's hair smelt like freshly picked apples, not lavender, and she had a little scar on her left shoulder from crashing her bike into a tree when she was eleven. Harry didn't know why he remembered that, but he did. And now he couldn't go back to sleep anymore.

He propped up on his elbows, reaching for his phone on the nightstand to check what time it was. It was almost half past two in the morning. The worst time of the day to be awake. Usually, at this hour, his thoughts would go out of control and he would always end up doing things that he would regret in the morning, like what he was going to do next.

He searched for Y/N's number despite knowing to call her up this late would be cruel, if she had class early in the morning and needed her full eight-hour sleep. However, he missed her too much and desperately wanted to hear her voice. He had no idea what had gotten into him and why he was so needy for her attention. She was his little Bambi. But he seemed to have forgotten that already ever since he got jealous over her relationship, or whatever it was between her and his best friend.

He quietly left the bedroom and made that impulsive move to dial Y/N's number, biting his nails as the beeping on the line continued for what seemed like forever.

But it wasn't Y/N who picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"I-Isaac?" Harry nearly choked when he heard the voice, still he prayed she'd left her phone in Isaac's car or something. Something. Anything. Let it not be what he had in mind. "Is Y/N there?"

"Yeah, she's sleeping. She told me to pick up the phone."

Harry heard noises in the background like someone shifting between the sheets. And he had the squeezed his eyes shut to fight the thought that his worst fear had come true.

"Who's that?" Her sleepy voice was faint but he could tell it was her talking to Isaac.

"It's Harry."

"Great...You talk to Harry, I'm gonna sleep..."

"Mate, she just...dozed off again." Isaac's chuckle drove Harry insane. "Is it urgent?"

"No...uhm...Her dad just asked me to check on her. It's fine." That awful lie was followed by the worst laugh Harry had ever faked, but Isaac couldn't recognize that over the phone so he sounded so indifferent when saying goodnight and goodbye to his best friend.

Harry's heart died down as soon as the call ended. He dropped his arms down to his sides and leaned against the wall behind him, looking defeated. He stood there, pondering for about five minutes before deciding to head back to bed and trying to get some sleep before sunrise.

The girl who looked like Y/N was still sleeping. He kind of envied her now because he couldn't fall back to sleep, so he just closed his eyes and tried to think about anything but the previous phone call.

As he dug through the memory box in the small dusty corner of his mind, Harry found himself going back to that hot summer afternoon in the treehouse and he could hear her voice reading aloud the story in her pink notebook.

"Once upon a time, there was a boy and a girl, and no one else..."

Harry didn't know how that story ended because Y/N had never finished it, or at least never revealed the ending to him. But how wonderful could it have been, if that was the last sentence of the story instead of the first? Now, he could no longer return to the world where there was no one else besides them two.

[nexttrickanvils]

FE3H Fic: Falling for You

Title: Falling For You

Characters: Claude Von Reigen, F!Byleth, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd, Edelgard Von Hresvelg, Sylvain Jose Gautier, Mercedes Von Martritz, small cameos from a few FE: Fates characters

Ships: Claude x Byleth, background Sylvain x Mercedes

Notes: Modern!AU

---------

The first thing Claude thought was: “Did anyone get the number on the bus that just hit me?”

“Sir!? Sir!? Are you alright!?”

The second thing Claude thought was: “...Oh...”

He stared up at the bespectacled blue haired woman looking over him with concern on her face.

“Sir! Do you need me to call someone? Do you know where you are? What...”

Claude groaned as he finally sat up and gave the woman a carefree smile.

“I’m fine, I’m fine. No need to call somebody and if it’ll make you feel better, we’re at the Garreg Mach Public Library.”

She sighed in relief and smiled back.

“Good.”

The blue haired woman offered her hand to Claude and helped him up. She then turned to a group of young kids. Guess she must have been a teacher or something.

“Kana?”

One kid in particular, a young boy with messy silver hair stepped forward and stood next to his teacher.

“Now Kana, what do we say when we bump into someone?”

The boy looked up at Claude with big fat tears in his eyes.

“I’M SORRY MISTER! I DIDN’T MEAN TO! I GOT EXCITED AND...”

“Hey, hey no need to shout little guy, we’re at the library. And don’t worry, I forgive you. Just make sure you listen to your Teach okay?”

The boy let out a sniffle and an “Okay.”

He went back to his little group and took the hand of a red-haired girl a couple years older than him.

The teacher looked back at Claude, “Once again, I am so sorry for my student...”

“Come on, you don’t gotta apologize too. Believe me, if you want to hear some horror stories about hyper kids, just ask my mom about my childhood.”

She gave a small chuckle and Claude felt a slight heat in his cheeks.

“Nonetheless, they are my responsibility. So I shoulder some of the blame.”

“Don’t worry, I’m fine. You should get back to your job instead of worrying about me.”

She nodded and turned back to her group, “Alright everyone, now where we?”

Claude watched with a smile as the kids and their teacher walked off to the library’s kids section. 

He quickly returned to what he was doing before and yet as the day went on, he kept thinking about the blue haired woman.

She seemed nice, hells nicer than some of the teachers he grew up with. Those kids are lucky to have her.

Not to mention, if Claude had to be honest, she was kind of cute and that laugh…

Claude shook his head, what was he doing? It’s not like he was going to see her again.

...Though he wouldn’t mind that… maybe get to hear her laugh again…

…

“...I picked a bad time to realize I have a thing for girls in glasses didn’t I?”

===

Telling Dimitri and Edelgard about what happened was probably the dumbest thing Claude could have done.

Dimitri’s reaction wasn’t too bad, supportive and was even willing to help out if needed, but Edelgard… Claude can’t remember the last time his friend laughed this hard.

“...You done?”

Edelgard’s laughter started to slow down and she finally took a few breaths.

“M-my apologies, Claude it’s just…hahaha... it’s just funny to think that you, Claude “I don’t believe in hokey stuff like Moon Signs and Soulmates” Von Reigen of all people would fall in love at first sight.”

“Hey I did NOT “fall in love at first sight.” I’m just curious about her and want to see her again. Get to know her better you know?”

“That… sounds an awful lot like love at first sight.” Remarked Dimitri the Traitor

Claude glared at them both as he took a swig of his drink.

The blonde smiled and continued, “To be honest, it all does sound rather romantic.”

“Except for the part where you were knocked over by a toddler.” Added Edelgard

“I did not get knocked over by a toddler… I think the kid was in kindergarten.”

At that, Dimitri let out a laugh that he tried very hard to hide. Claude said nothing as he went back to his drink.

“All joking aside, what was her name? Perhaps you could look her up online...” asked Edelgard

At that, Claude nearly choked. 

Shit! He never got her name!

Claude smacked his head against the bar and even though he couldn’t see them, he could feel the disappointed expressions on Dimitri and Edelgard’s faces.

...Well okay maybe disappointed isn’t the right word but they are judging him.

===

At some point last night, his friends did actually give Claude some good advice.

Most of the local schools had photos of their staff on their websites and without knowing her name, this seemed like the best and “least likely to get the cops called on him” way to find her. 

So he grabbed his phone and a notepad and sat down at his favorite coffee shop. This shouldn’t take too long right?

...Too bad no one told him that there was a whole lot of elementary schools in Garreg Mach. Claude knew this place was a big city. He’s lived here for a good few years now and he swears he keeps finding new old places. 

But did this city really need this many elementary schools!?

“Not really how I pictured spending my afternoon” Claude muttered as he scratched out Saint Cethlean Elementary & Middle School off his list. At this rate, Mystery Teach will have retired by the time Claude found out where she worked.

After scratching out six or maybe seven more schools from the list, Claude took a glance around the coffee shop; the place was starting to get a little too crowded for his liking. Maybe he should head out and take a break. Maybe do some people watching near the old Monastery.

However just as he stood up, he spotted a familiar someone at the counter.

“Here you go Ma’am, have a nice day!” “Thank you, you too.”

No way… there was no way…

Except there was no mistaking that blue hair or her voice.

...Claude wasn’t exactly a religious man but he couldn’t help but mentally thank whatever god or goddess seemed to be listening to him.

He waited until she stepped out of line before taking a deep breath, putting on his most charming smile, and approaching her; being very careful not to startle her.

However before he could reach her, the crowd in the shop seemed to shift and Claude found himself stuck.

“Hey! ‘Scuse me! Tryna get through!”

Claude tried his best to get through the crowd but some people were just way too stubborn and pushy for their own. Before long, Claude found himself falling forward out of the crowd.

‘Okay I’m taking back the thanks to any god or goddess listening, cause they’re obviously jerks and are laughing at me.’

Claude stood back and tried to look for around for the woman. Soon he spotted her through the window, walking away and chatting with a short haired blonde woman. The blonde seemed familiar somehow to Claude but he couldn’t put his finger on it.

As for who she probably was, she was likely Teach’s co-worker or just a friend… or even a girlfriend.

It was that thought that made Claude realize: What the hells was he doing?

Is he really so desperate that a smile and some basic human decency is enough to make him act like an idiot tripping over himself?

He didn’t even know her name, for gods’ sake!

Claude sighed as he picked up the things he dropped and headed out of the coffee shop.

====

Claude had hoped to spend a nice quiet evening hanging out and drinking with Dimitri and Edelgard.

Unfortunately this was not to be because when he arrived at their usual spot, Edelgard looked like she was ready to strangle someone and Dimitri was in a friendly(?) headlock by a loud drunk with bright red hair. It took Claude a minute to recognize the guy as Sylvain, one of Dimitri’s friends.

He took a seat next to Edelgard and shot her a sympathetic look. “Long night?”

“It’s only been an hour.”

“So what brought Sylvain here?”

“Apparently he’s getting married to Mercedes.”

If Claude had a drink, this would be the point where he’d spit it all over the counter.

“Wait. Sylvain is getting married. OUR Sylvain?”

“Do we know any others?”

“...So...”

“Dimitri called Mercedes to come pick Sylvain up. She was just getting off work when he called so hopefully she’ll be here soon.”

Claude looked at the thrilled drunk redhead and could hear him gushing about his fiancee and how she’s one of the few people who could see the “real him.” 

Meanwhile poor Dimitri is just nodding along and adding the ocasional “I know” and “I’m very happy for you.”

“Never thought Sylvain of all people would get married.”

“Well I suppose this week has been one for miracles. Speaking of: how is your search for your true love going?”

Claude decided to ignore the “true love” comment and explained to Edelgard that he gave up.

“Give up? That doesn’t sound like you.”

“Yeah well, I didn’t realize how many schools I had to look up and I kind of had an epiphany that I was acting like a creepy idiot.”

“I see.”

After a few more minutes of trying to talk to his friends over Sylvain’s ramblings, Claude heard the sound of the bar door opening. He looked over and his eyes widened.

“Mercedes? I almost didn’t recognize you.” remarked Edelgard

The blonde giggled as she showed off her short hair.

“Do you like it? It was starting to become a bit of a hassle to take care of it and I thought it was time for a change.”

THAT’S WHY SHE SEEMED FAMILIAR, Claude just didn’t recognize her with the new haircut.

Upon hearing Mercede’s voice, Sylvain released his death grip on Dimitri and stumbled over to her.

“BABY!” he shouted as he fell into her arms

“Hello to you too dear.” Mercedes said with a smile

She then turned to the three, “I hope Sylvain didn’t give you three too much trouble.”

“N-not at all. He merely wanted to let us know about the engagement and celebrate. Congratulations by the way.” said Dimitri

“Let us know when you figure out a wedding date alright?” said Edelgard

Mercedes nodded.

“We will, thank you. I’ll be taking him home now. Good night everyone.”

As Mercedes started to walk towards the exit with Sylvain’s arm draped around her shoulders, Claude stood up.

“Hey wait Mercie!”

“Hm? Oh, Claude. What is it?”

“This… might be a weird question but… do you… happen to have a co-worker who’s a… woman with blue hair and glasses?”

===

“Okay so let me get the story straight. You were at the library, one of the kids that Mercie watches over knocked you flat on your ass and you fell in love with her co-worker when she checked on you?”

Claude glared at Sylvain, “Aside from the “falling in love part,” yeah you got it down.”

So it turned out that Mercedes was co-workers with Mystery Teach in an After-School Program. After Claude explained his situation, Mercedes offered to let Sylvain drive him to the school that she worked at to meet her co-worker, Byleth. 

Gods did it feel good to FINALLY have a name to work with.

“You know… since I’m picking up Mercedes, if both girls are up for it, we can do a double date right away.”

“Just shut up and drive.”

The two stayed quiet for the rest of the ride (though not for lack of trying on Sylvain’s part) until they finally arrived at the school.

Claude could hear the kids further down the hall, guess Mercedes and Byleth weren’t off the clock just yet. Thus he and Sylvain sat down on a nearby bench.

He chuckled and Sylvain looked at him curiously.

“Oh just… sitting out here kinda makes me think of my own school days. Like I’m waiting for the Principal to come out and lecture me for releasing a stink bomb in the gym.”

“Whoa, really?” Sylvain asked with a laugh

“In my defense, it wasn’t supposed to go off at that moment; the casing was just badly made.”

The two made small talk as they watched parents come in and out with their kids.

Claude always liked people watching but he’d never seen such… interesting characters.

Like the guy who looked like he stepped out of a comic book, his wife who looked like she could bench press DIMITRI, and their kid who looked like the dad’s sidekick.

Then there’s the father+daughter duo wearing toy fox ears and making, he’s assuming, fox noises as they went down the hall.

A few more minutes passed by when a little voice shouted out, “Hey Mister!”

Claude turned to the voice and saw that same silver haired boy who ran into him.

“Oh well look who it is. You doing alright kid? Listening to your Teach, I hope?”

The boy, Kana, he thinks Byleth called him, nods and smiles.

“Uh-huh. Are you here to see Ms. Byleth?”

“Heh, aren’t you a smart kid. Yup, just here say hi to her.”

“...Are you marrying Ms. Byleth?”

Claude’s eyes widened as he let out a choked noise and Sylvain let out a laugh.

“Kana!”

Approaching them all was a friendly looking guy with silver hair, a woman with red hair that Claude could only describe as “fluffy,” and a slightly older red haired girl.

“Hi mama!”

The little boy rushed into his mom’s arms and was lifted up. The woman sighed and faced Claude and Sylvain.

“I’m sorry, I hope he wasn’t bothering you.”

“N-nah, it’s… it’s fine.” Claude said, trying to hide the red on his face

The redheaded woman nodded and started to walk away with her family while the boy waved good-bye to Claude.

“Bye-bye Mister!”

As soon as that family was out the doors, Sylvain shot Claude a shit-eating grin.

“Smart kid right?”

Claude said nothing as he glared at him.

A couple more families came and went and Claude was starting to nervously tap his foot on the floor. The longer the two waited, the more chances Claude had to overthink.

Did Byleth even remember what happened at the library? Would she just stare at him blankly if he tried to explain who he was? Would she think he was some stalker?

Thankfully before Claude could further give himself a panic attack, two women stepped out from one of the rooms.

Mercedes… and Byleth.

Sylvain of course practically jumped off the bench and ran over to greet his fianceé while Byleth stood to the side and watched the two in amusement.

Well… now or never. Claude stood up, took a deep breath, put on his most charming smile, and approached her; being very careful not to startle her.

“Hey Teach.”

Byleth turned to him. At first she looked confused but a spark of recognition quickly lit her eyes.

“Oh, it’s you, the man from the library. Are you doing alright? No bumps? No dizziness or anything?”

“I told you before, I’m fine. You don’t need to call a doc or anything. The name’s Claude by the way.” he replied with a laugh as he offered his hand

“I’m Byleth and sorry about that. The double checking’s become a force of habit. My roommate can tell you plenty of stories about me slipping into what she calls “Teacher Talk” to her.” She said as she took his hand and shook it

“Heh well maybe if you got the time, we can sit down for a drink or some coffee and you can tell me all about it?”

Byleth gave him that same smile that he couldn’t stop thinking about.

“I’d love to.”

[hows-it-holed-up]

Perfunctory Photo Recap: The O.C. 2x14

Up until now I’ve only been doing these recaps for pilots, but getting stuck watching only pilots – which are usually the absolute worst episodes – of series I love sounds pretty grim. So as of now, any iconic episodes of any show are fair game. ERGO, despite the fact that The O.C. has what I’m fairly sure is a phenomenal pilot, I’m skipping ahead to the February sweeps episode of the show’s second season: “The Rainy Day Women.” If I remember correctly, it’s extremely emotionally satisfying and I will probably spend the last 15 minutes just pressing my hand to my own sternum and sighing. 

My Disclaimer: None of these posts will be in any way comprehensive, because I’m lazy. All of them are probably going to have spoilers of some sort for the entire series…or at least what I remember of it from when I last watched it an eon ago. Exactly what you want in a recap!

California, Here We Come: Kirsten and Sandy (aka Mom and Dad) have been fighting because the former love of his life needed some PRETTY INTENSE legal help, and he jumped at the chance. Kirsten understandably doesn’t love this! Meanwhile, Summer is about to jet off to Italy for her BF Zach’s sister’s wedding, because somehow we’re still pretending like this is a thing. Plus some other stuff is going on with some other characters blah blah who cares. Welcome to The O.C., bitch!

I read somewhere that Josh Schwartz always hated this title sequence – that he could never find something he was super satisfied with and just kind of acquiesced to this. Meanwhile the rest of us are screaming the words to “California” while we head bang and strum our air guitars, every episode.

In the first big scene, we catch up with Mom and Dad, who have been struggling for a few episodes because an old flame came back into his life asking for help, and he dove in head first. 

Kirsten is not pleased. This Rebecca situation was so heartbreaking. Sandy Cohen’s whole thing is that he always does what’s right. This was one of the only times in the series it felt like he had other viable options and he was obviously misstepping. I’m with Kiki here. 

Oh hello Olivia Wilde! I forgot you were in this show! She’s insanely beautiful, obviously, but those mid-aughts pencil-thin eyebrows didn’t do anyone any favors. Not that I would know anything about this personally, of course.   

And not doing the show itself any favors 15 years out: this “Marissa is a lesbian but it’s definitely just a phase” storyline. I remember thinking it was a little gratuitous and questionable even back in ‘05. 

Speaking of questionable plots: We’ve been strung along for half a season watching Seth trying to win Summer back and her rebuffing him. And Summer’s right – it WAS pretty annoying! Seth’s still at it, heading over to her place as she’s packing for Zach’s sister’s wedding in Italy, but...not really having anything to say! (i.e. still not there to advance the plot.) 

We get a brief interlude to watch Julie Cooper think about how she could snip the tip off her husband’s penis. 

And then we’re back to the real story. Although I’d honestly rather stick with Julie because:

SANDY. NO. THIS IS NOT APPROPRIATE! You cannot spend the night in a hotel room with your ex. You also cannot drink wine on the floor of said hotel room with said ex! Stop it! 

Seriously. You know what could happen. 

Anyway, Seth thinks he’s figured out how he might actually be able to move the needle with Summer. He’s bought his boat back and is going to take her...sailing in the pool? Sure! Foolproof!

I had a literature professor in college who would bring this show up in class every week, linking it to whatever we were reading at the time. He didn’t do this because he thought he was bridging some kind of gap between us and the material – only about 1/4 of the class even watched this show. He just did it because it made him happy. This “objective correlative” reference really made me think about him and chuckle.  

At the airport on her way to Italy, Summer sees a little boy playing with a horse on top of some comic books. I guess she’s like, “Even though I’m only supposed to be 17 my biological clock is already ticking,” and she ditches Zach and heads to Seth’s. 

Checking in with our other couple, Sandy has finally (sort of) come to his senses and headed home – after Rebecca straight up ran away from him because she was about to get caught by the cops. Helps when the universe just makes decisions for you, I guess!

Ehhhhh I mean it started a little! 

Anyway, they kiss, and it’s very sweet. And we’re all breathing a sigh of relief.  And we won’t sic Julie on him just yet.

Meanwhile, their son is on the roof attempting to adjust the satellite. He’s put on a Spiderman mask because it’s all he’s got to protect his head from the rain, somehow, and he’s decided the only safety precaution he needs is A ROPE TIED AROUND HIS MIDSECTION. Things, predictably, go awry. 

HOW did Seth not get literally sliced in half by this? He must have slid like 30-40 feet from the top of the roof to where he’s dangling. I have no interest in doing the calculations to verify this statement, but I’m pretty sure we’re at least looking at some internal bleeding here.  

Anyway, Summer arrives, finds Seth dangling in the back, and:

The emotional payoff for this arc, now that it’s FINALLY concluded, is excellent. And what a delightful way to anchor it for this character. 

It’s hard not to love this scene – it’s heartwarming. But with the benefit of 15 years and a rewatch, it also seems like this must have been VERY uncomfortable to film. Like apart from having to hang upside down for who knows how long, how was there not water dripping down Adam Brody’s (or more likely, this stunt person’s) nose the entire time?? Somebody call OSHA!

Musings from the Poolhouse:

- This show is disguised as a teen soap, but it’s so much more than that. Between its overarching commentary on privilege and the status quo and its own self-awareness (exemplified by winks at the audience like show-within-a-show-cum-commentary-on-itself-AND-reality-television, The Valley), The O.C. is one of the cleverest series ever to grace network television. Despite a few things not aging particularly well, it’s still a really fun experience to watch it. Except for season 3. Skip season 3. 

- Julie. Cooper. JUST. YES. YES YES YES.  

- Marissa’s face when Alex is talking to her about having to do things like take out garbage and pay rent made me LOL. 

- I may have been projecting a little bit about the kid with the horse at the airport. He was very cute. And I think my own ovaries have kicked into high gear.   

- There was an entire (C? D? E?) plot in this episode about Lindsay’s paternity and moving to Chicago and some other stuff I can’t bring myself to care about. Ben McKenzie and Shannon Lucio had like negative chemistry, so despite the show’s best efforts to make us invested in that relationship, it just wasn’t landing. I remember caring way more about her storyline with her mom, Caleb, Kirsten, even Seth. So, shrug, she’s moving to Chicago I guess! 

- Josh Schwartz is so good at music! Apart from Phantom Planet (obviously), I clocked Blind Melon, Louis XIV, Boyz II Men, Bell X1 and Matt Pond PA (covering Oasis) in this episode. A real auditory journey down memory lane. Did I miss any?

[raywritesthings]

Oi! Don’t Blink!

My Writing Fandom: Doctor Who Characters: Tenth Doctor, Martha Jones, Wilfred Mott, Donna Noble Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Donna Noble Summary: Donna Noble's investigations into trouble lead her to an old house in Wester Drumlins. Meanwhile, the Doctor is flagged down by a different person to tell him about his future. Notes: Hey everybody. I feel bad I haven't posted much as of late, and then I remember I had this plot bunny sitting in my google docs. I have some other scenes from the episode sketched out, but I thought just the general concept could stand on its own and I wanted to give you all something to read. Not sure when I'll get around to writing the rest of it which is why this is listed as complete for now, but if you see additional chapters at a later date, don't be surprised. Anyway, I think this idea was inspired by an article somebody wrote some months (years?) back about how Sally Sparrow from Blink was asked to be a companion after Martha, and the writer of the article was...let's say dismissive at best of Donna and Catherine Tate's ability. So me, being the rather petty person I am at times, decided to write a story where there is no Sally Sparrow. That being said, I mean no offense to Sally or her actress (Carey Mulligan, I think?) or fans of them. I think "Blink" is a good standalone episode in its own right. This is just me having a bit of fun. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did! *Can be read on my AO3*

It was an otherwise unremarkable day. The Doctor and Martha had ended up a few years into her personal future, which he ordinarily tried to avoid. But lizards were notoriously difficult to schedule, particularly when it came to their hatchlings.

They’d been on the chase all afternoon, on foot for most of it. As time had quickly begun to run out, however, he’d flagged down a taxi.

“Pull over here,” he instructed the driver. They’d have to run the rest of the way, but it was better that no one else get too close.

Martha started to reach for her wallet as the taxi stopped.

“I’ve got it,” he said quickly, reaching into his pockets. “Can’t have you circulating cash out of its proper time.”

“You carry money?” Martha looked rather impressed with him.

“Well, someone told me I ought to,” he replied evasively.

Martha’s smile dimmed. “Right.” She got out of the taxi without waiting for him, so he hurriedly finished paying and clambered out onto the pavement.

He hadn’t gone two paces when someone called out to him. “Hey, Doctor!”

The Doctor spun about on the balls of his feet. There was an old man sitting at a newsstand in a checkered shirt and jumper, and he was grinning broadly at him.

“I thought it was. Saw you getting out of that taxi, and I thought, ‘Well, there he is!’ Didn’t expect you by today.”

“Oh, well I’m passing through, really. Sort of on my way elsewhere,” he found himself explaining to the stranger. 

“Doctor, we haven't got time for this.” Martha had come back up the road to get him. “The migration's started.”

“Right, in a bit of a rush. Sorry.”

He made to rejoin Martha, and the man chuckled good-naturedly. “Well, wouldn’t want to hold you up. But, ah, aren’t you missing someone? Eh?”

“Er…” The Doctor did a quick headcount. Him and Martha, just like he’d thought. “No, no I don’t think so. Sorry, have we actually met before?”

The smile finally dropped off the old man’s face. “Haven’t we?”

“Doctor, please. Twenty minutes to red hatching,” Martha reminded.

“Look, sorry, I've got a bit of a complex life,” he tried to explain as quickly as he could. “Things don't always happen to me in quite the right order. Gets a bit confusing at times, especially at weddings. I'm rubbish at weddings, especially my own.”

“Well, don’t be too hard on yourself. I thought you were alright,” said the man.

The Doctor froze. “What?”

But the stranger’s eyes had widened with some kind of realization. “Oh, this is the day, isn’t it?”

“Hold on, what day?” The Doctor was still having trouble trying to figure out why this man had an opinion on his hypothetical wedding performance.

“Yeah, she said you wouldn’t know. Listen, you’ve got to take this.” He leaned down and pulled out a sealed bag stuffed with what looked to be a number of things. “Everything’s in there you’ll need.”

“Need for what?” He took the bag anyway.

“Doctor!” Martha called.

“You’re gonna get stuck in time. Or you did, cos of the statues or something. But don’t you worry, she’ll take care of you.”

“Who’s ‘she’?”

“My granddaughter. I think you’re supposed to have met her already. She tried explaining the whole thing to me, but I don’t think I have it all clear.”

“Who is she?” He repeated.

“Doctor, come on!” Martha urged once more. The Doctor knew she was right to hurry him along, but he couldn’t help the frustration at sensing there was something rather important going on here, at least for him.

The red hatching came first, though. He checked his watch. They really couldn’t delay any longer.

“Right, well, lovely meeting you. Got to dash.” He stuffed the bag and its unknown contents deep in his coat pocket, resolving to just forget it for now. Then he turned to finally follow Martha to the hatching.

The stranger called after them, “Hey, good luck, you two!”

Martha looked back over her shoulder at him as they ran. “What was that about?”

The Doctor shook his head. “No idea.”

—-

Two weeks later, the Doctor found himself stranded in an alley with Martha in 1969, and he thought he was beginning to get something of an idea.

“I mean, what are we gonna do?” His companion was quickly reaching distress, not that he could blame her being stuck some forty-odd years in her relative past.

Hold on, stuck.

“Those angels—”

“The statues,” the Doctor corrected.

“You just said they were called Weeping Angels,” said Martha.

“Yes, but the statues. He said we’d be stuck in time because of the statues. That’s now!”

“Who said?”

“The man at the newsstand. Uh, four things and a lizard?” He added, hoping to jog her memory.

Martha frowned. “I thought you didn’t have a clue what he was on about.”

“I didn’t, not then, but I do now. He was trying to tell me about my future in my past, only it wasn’t going to make any sense till the present, see?”

“No,” said Martha, rather bluntly.

“Look, the important thing is, we’re not really stuck. We can get out of this.”

She looked the closest to happy since they’d gotten zapped back to this time. “Back to the TARDIS?”

“Hopefully, because we can’t let the Angels have her.” He began to rummage in the pockets of his overcoat. It was somewhere in there, shoved away and forgotten about till now. “The man at the newsstand gave me some kind of supplies or instructions, said they were from his granddaughter.”

“And who’s that?”

“I’m not sure.” The Doctor found what he was looking for and pulled out the thick packet. “He said I might have already met her, but I suppose there’s no way of knowing.”

“Well, you could open that bag and see,” was Martha’s suggestion.

“Right!” He did so, plopping down onto the ground with his back to the wall in order to tip the contents out onto his lap.

There were a number of things. Some photos, a sort of list, a few handwritten notes.

“Is that money?” Martha grabbed at a smaller plastic bag and took out a large quantity of bills. “Oh, and they’re all from before 1969!” A relieved laugh escaped her. “We’re not gonna starve! Whoever this is, she’s good.”

“Well, he said she’d take care of me — er, us, I mean.” The Doctor supposed it could’ve easily been a general ‘you’, but there’d been something about the way the man had said it, with a sort of special twinkle in his eye. Just who were these people?

An envelope caught his eye, which he snagged only to frown in puzzlement.

“Did she write us something?” Asked Martha.

“She wrote you something at least.” The Doctor showed her the front of the envelope.

“‘Spaceman and Martha’?” She read aloud, a slight laugh on the end. “Well, that’s got to be you, doesn’t it?”

The Doctor wasn’t sure how to answer, so he tore open the envelope and took out their letter. Martha slid down the wall into a crouch to look over his shoulder.

Dear Spaceman and Martha, it officially began.

It’s weird writing you about something that’s long in the past for all of us, but that’s time travel for you. If Gramps did this right, you should’ve gotten this before the Angels sent you back to 1969. If he hasn’t, then I suppose that blows the whole ontological paradox thing.

“What’s an ontological paradox?” Martha asked him.

“It’s what we’re in right now. Everything that’s happening to us only is happening because it already happened for her and vice versa.”

There’s some things you’ve got to do on your end. The first bit’s just waiting for Billy. I’m not sure how long it’ll be in your time till the Angels get him, but you’ll need to find him. It’s all down to him on getting us to be able to communicate.

And you’ve got to promise me you’re going to get him set up nice there since you can’t bring him back with you. Make sure he’s comfy. He’s a good man, and he didn’t deserve any of this.

It was the strangest sense of deja vu he’d ever felt. He knew that speech pattern, could almost put a voice to it, but he just didn’t understand. How had he already met the person who was going to help them out of this? And how was it that he still didn’t even have her name, yet this letter read like a message from an old friend?

I packed my notes for the conversation you’re going to record. Billy puts it on the DVDs on that list, and then it’s just more waiting round for me to get to it — oh! and you’ve got to write me the message at the house. Wester Drumlins. Don’t forget or I’m gonna get clobbered by a vase or something, and then where will we be?

I should really have you two look this over before I give it to Gramps. That’d be just like me to leave out something important.

“Are we sure this is going to work?” Martha was eyeing the letter somewhat doubtfully now.

“We have to be,” was the only reply he could give her.

Assuming this goes alright, you’ll be seeing me soon. I hope you’re excited. I know I was. And if I’m going to get a bit personal here — sorry, Martha — but I just want you to know, Doctor:

Not that I mean to create some sort of ontological obligation, but the last few years have been the best second chance at getting it right I’ve ever had. I don’t say it enough. And I’m not going to say I couldn’t imagine my life without you, because I did try that, and it was awful which is sort of the point. So thank you, really. Because you’ve saved me, too.

I’ll see you both soon.

Love,

Donna

“Donna,” the Doctor echoed dumbly. “Donna?” He stood, letting the letter fall into Martha’s lap.

He only knew one Donna, and if the man was right and he’d already met this Donna — but it couldn’t be her! She’d gone off to see the world on her own, being magnificent without him.

“Who’s Donna?” Asked Martha. She was looking from him to the letter and back again. “Do you actually know her?”

“I know a Donna,” he grudgingly admitted. The Doctor plucked up one of the photographs. It was of the house at Wester Drumlins, a wall in the sitting room which someone had written on. Well, him and Martha, apparently. And there was the name DONNA NOBLE.

But she couldn’t have gotten mixed up in this. Donna didn’t want anything to do with him. He’d scared her away, not saved her. It couldn’t really be her.

“Er, Mister? There’s a postscript,” said Martha, interrupting his thoughts, and she held the letter back out to him with a nervous look.

The Doctor took it.

P.S. Martha said I’ve got to remind you to behave. I better not hear you’ve been sitting on your skinny arse while she’s been working for three months. You treat her right. Seriously, Martha, you’re too good to him.

Okay. Definitely her.

[hecohansen31]

Not Of Age: (Duncan Shepherd+Reader)

A/N: Hello there, lovelies!

How was everything?

I am a bit stressed out for various thing, but also… you know what would help a lot? FEEDBACK (please if you have a minute of your time spare it to either heart this fic, comment on it, or reblog it, only if you liked it, obviously) (+you are always welcome to tell me what went wrong, what went right, in either my messages or in my asks, I am always happy to get one so…).

Also this is all inspired to something that happened to me (no I sadly don’t know any Duncan Shepherds in real life), since I get a lot mistaked for younger than I actually am (and I know it might sound strange but it is something I am insecure about, because people don’t take you seriously).

(Plus: one of my photos of the collage is actually mine, because I am wearing the dress, I described in the fic, so you can see it better+I don’t know I love the way that dress is one me…so) (Also i censored my face, because I was without make-up+I was wearing a very obnoxious flower crown).

Plus, before this gets controversial, Duncan in this fic is not interested into Reader because she is younger and might not seem of age, but he is more attracted to her “potrayal of youth”.

As always… I talk too much so I shall leave you to appreciating the fanfiction (let me know if you want a sequel because I mgiht be working on something right now!).

SUMMARY: You don’t show your age, and this got you in so much troubles, such as the one you got into after an unexpected visit on a Saturday’s morning, in an extra meeting with Duncan Shepherd

WORDS: 2,3 K.

WARNINGS: Just Duncan being flirty, and mostly kissing (no smut), also Older! Man in a relationship with a younger girl!

She had always been the girl, who looked much younger than her true age .

Both for her terrible childish manners (not only she still had the that naivety which was only seen in children, but also a brattish character that sometimes got her in trouble, mostly in relationships) both for the fact that her appearance was juvenile and much more belonging to a teen than an actually woman, who was 25 years old, which prompted many awkward and weird situations.

Such as the typical bar patron who asked her ID after she ordered alcohol, alongside a few of her partners on internet picking her up just because she looked much younger or mumbling something as “are you legal?”, when they saw her.

And although many people thought that it was an advantage, it was something she personally found annoying, mostly when people reminded her of it as it meant she was somehow shallow and not worthy of being taken seriously.

Many of her friends had also by now a kid on the way and were already married (although some settled for the first one that came through the window and it showed), so being the only single friend, not only sucked, but meant that apparently she was less trust worthy than a pregnant woman, alongside the fact that she didn’t seem to belong at all whenever a wedding was mentioned or a baby shower, and she just stared at the wall till they all giggled together, joining her friends there.

That day she seemed young not only because she wasn’t wearing her usual heavy make-up, which helped a lot with making her feel not only more confident but also a few years older, but she was dressed in a pretty sundress she had wanted to wear to the typical brunch her friends had on the first day of summer, setting themselves in a park in order to talk a bit.

The sundress was a perfect solution for the warm weather which coated her body in the form of sweat; but also she honestly loved the way the dress fit on her body, giving her a pretty hourglass figure, with its 50’s style..

She had bought the dress something like ten years ago, it had been her first dress ever, and although it was a bit ruined by the excessive washing she still felt comforted by wearing it and it still looked pretty amazing: its organza skirt bore a flowery pattern, her favorite!

She hadn’t worn make-up, stopped by the terrible hotness of the day, choosing to hide herself from the eyes of her friends and the sun with sunglasses and a straw hat, brought back from a very old journey, but which gave her a “Heiress on Vacation” kind of look.

The last touch of the look would have been sandals, but she had to go for sneaker since her boss called her at work for an emergency reunion, ruining her entire day of the brunch.

She hadn’t had enough time to change into something more “work appropriate” so she had just to go with her sundress and sneakers, hoping nobody would notice the terrible match.

The hat had been gently discarded to the secretary, meanwhile she “helloed” her and her boss made her a sign to move onto her office quickly, where she plumped down on her turning chair and checked into a mirror the state of her hair, after she had walked (more like ran) to work, sweating like a pig, (to hide it, she applied a generous amount of the extra-deodorant she had in her office for emergency such as this one).

She knew nothing about what she was supposed to be expecting.

Her boss had just mumbled something about “a very important client cancelling a meeting and asking for another on Saturday morning” when she wasn’t supposed to be working, but her boss had asked for a favor, alongside a promise of an extra on her paycheck to take the job.

“It will only last an hour maximum, I just need you to make him sign the documents and nobody is answering me…” because the offices were supposed to be closed on Saturday, and knowing this no clients were allowed in the building on Saturday…. alongside the fact that many people at 8 A.M. of Saturday were still sleeping with their phones off, meanwhile she had had to wake up, since not only she had had to get ready but the park for the brunch was two hours away from her.

“Ok… I will take it, but please… sign it as extra-work” she had mumbled, before sending her friends a message on how she would be sadly missing at least the first part of the brunch and to leave her something to eat, since she would come an hour later than she had programmed.

And maybe even more…

Because after what seemed like half an hour after the appointment had been set, she stilll saw nobody and she had even tried to ask the secretary (also extraordinarily there) if she had known something about the “mysterious man”, just to get a shake of head and a whisper on how much she hated that job (on which she agreed).

She was halfway through painting her nails, the one she had accidentally scratched on her way to the job, when she heard a knock on her door, surprising her enough that she almost painted her dress of the same teal color of her nail polish.

She mumbled a “please enter”, meanwhile she meticulously hid the nail polish’s bottle and breathed hot air on her nails to get them to dry quicker, not wanting to leave signs on the poor man’s hand.

And meanwhile she did all this, a man walked in her office, a very handsome and known man, whom she knew because of all the “Vanity Fair” ’s covers her boss had in her office, practically worshipping the self-made man, Duncan Shepherd had become after his exit from jail.

And not only did he look better in reality than on magazine cover, but he looked at her with two of the prettiest eyes she had even seen, preying on her as if she was some kind of water in a sandy desert.

She felt immediately the bush rising to her face, regretting not having taken a jacket with her, leaving her cleavage exposed since the dress had a deep “v” neck, which prompted a lot of skin to be shown and although it was pretty breathy for the summer, it didn’t mean that it was appropriate for the workplace.

Although to be stared like that by such a powerful man…

It wasn’t the “I want to make you feel like a piece of meat” stare so many frat boys gave her, but it was the “I will have you on your desk in five minutes, if you are interested”.

-Ehm… I think I have the wrong office, I was looking for Mrs (L/N)- he mumbled, thinking her to be the wrong person, but she just mumbled a shy “you are in the right place”.

-… I am Mrs (L/N), but you may call me (Y/N)- you knew it was highly unprofessional to share your name with a client, mostly somebody who was here just to sign but you tried to make it all seem a bit more relaxed, more for yourself than for him, who would look at ease even in a Nordic climate -I am sorry for my inappropriate state, this meeting was scheduled at last minute and I was on my way to a friendly brunch-.

-I am extremely sorry for the meeting at this hour and day, but I had a problem with the scheduled appointment, and I wouldn’t be back in America till a month… so…-.

-Don’t worry, Mr Shepherd, I am more than happy to make an exception for you- she didn’t mean to make it sound so flirty, mostly because she wasn’t used to try her luck with guys like him, not to talk about the fact that her childish naivety scared away boys, but this one, stayed, interested, staring at her.

-Well thank you very much, then- he mumbled, matching her flirty tone, meanwhile coming nearer, where she showed him the chair, raising up and showing a bit of her legs, which made him lower his gaze on them, and she faked not noticing although she raised a bit on her toes to show much more -… give me a pen and I will be out of your hair soon-.

He smiled brightly at her sudden goofy attempt to grab a pen, just to grasp simply air, making an awkward figure, to which he giggled, till she offered the pen, and moved the contract for their agency in his hands, meanwhile their hands bumped just a bit together, electricity shooting through her veins.

She even lowered herself a bit, the cleavage appearing more evident and he caught it with his eyes as they lowered upon the papers, meanwhile she simply dropped on her elbows and her ass shot up, which got her in a very explicit position.

He read the papers, or at least appeared to be reading those chewing the pen, before setting it down and smile at her as he caught her looking at him, nibbling her bottom lip.

-I didn’t think that you were Mrs (L/N) because you seem so much younger- he mumbled, taking time, clearly, meanwhile she settled swiftly back a bit, embarrassed by how freely she had acted with him, although he had given her clear indications he was into her and was trying his best to flirt her up.

But he was still a client till he walked outside the door.

-Oh, believe me but a lot of people think the same- she giggled, trying to breathe out her embarrassment.

-… it isn’t a bad thing- he mumbled, meanwhile looking at her and smiling at her flushed cheeks -… I wish I looked younger! People nowadays ask me if I need glasses to see-.

She laughed heartedly, meanwhile he looked at her through his lashes as if to say he was serious.

-You look amazing, Mr Shepherd- this got him to puff his chest even further almost as a proud bird, which got a genuine smile from her -… and I mean it is nice to know you can somehow age slower, but also… a lot of people tend not to take you seriously if you don’t look mature enough, plus, guys are not interested into younglings…-.

This got her a shocked look from him, which changed swiftly in an outraged look.

-… boys tend to have that kind of thoughts- he mumbled, shooting her a serious glance, that went through her entire body -…men don’t-.

And he was a man, probably ten years her senior, although she had heard he was much older than what he seemed with a pendant for a new girl on his arm each week, much younger than him, so she knew what was going on, although she was not his usual supermodel.

-Thank you, I will set my mind onto dating only men from now on- she mumbled, shyly, before tapping at the paper, to remind him what was going on, shooting him a knowing look; she couldn’t because of so many reasons, although she wanted.

-You are very welcome- he muttered, before setting a last glance on her body and swiftly signing the paper -Then is it done? -.

-It is- she replied, moving to accompany him to the door, as a way to let him even further know that she sadly couldn’t.

-Then we are not a client and a professional, right? – he asked.

And with her typical childish naivety, not fully understanding his motives she answered.

-… yes-.

And he swiftly closed the door, behind them, before pulling her against the door with a sudden roughness she found herself liking, and left her legs trembling, before diving on her lips, with his, with much more gentleness than the push against the door, a bit dipping her as they did in the movies.

He was far gentler than what he had promised her with the “door movement”, getting her wondering what would come next… a kiss or a slap…

But he was careful with her now, probably after the yelp of pain he got from having pushed her back against the hard wood, before pushing her towards another kind of “hard wood”, much more human.

And this got a moan of pleasure transferred from her mouth to his, opening herself to his tongue and a languid caress from it, before it moved back to trace, as if to know them by heart, her lips.

When he separated himself from her, much more due to the lack of air than because he wanted to, he still kept her against him.

Her sundress had risen up a bit, and now her thighs were even more exposed, meanwhile her cleavage was widened up by the rushed tries and friction of her dress against his crisp elegant shirt, rigorously back, whereas hers was beige, matching their respective personalities.

He moved his eyes from the ground to her face, just to cup it and keeping the stare till their lips were near each other and then he closed them, as she did, but nothing but dry air went through them and when she opened them he had disappeared, which left her to wonder whether or not something had happened, till she saw the signed paper and felt the little ticket hidden in the cleavage of her dress, with an address from an hotel in Italy written on it and a number on the other side.

She wondered about what it meant, why her and how he managed to slip it in her dress without knowing why…

But now apparently she had a way to find it all out.

[makeste]

BnHA Episode 39: It’s Freestyle

Previously on BnHA: Pretty sure this takes place just after the whole “Deku goes to the shopping mall with his pals! WHAT COULD POSSIBLY HAPPEN -- oh. Oh, no” incident. Deku, Shigaraki is coming. OH MY GOD HE HAS AIRPODS ON. HE CAN’T HEAR US. OH MY GOD.

But of course it all turned out fine and Tomura skipped back home to plot how to destroy All Might by something something kidnapping Bakugou.

Today on BnHA: 

It snowed, and I went home from work early. So I turned on The Pool Episode of the BnHA anime because WHY NOT. 

Just FYI, I’ve only watched this once before, several months back, and don’t remember too much of it except that everyone has a very loose concept of what freestyle swimming is, and that I very much enjoyed it.

This recap will be manga spoiler-free since we want everyone to be able to have a fun time! So as long as you’re all caught up with the anime you should be good to go. I think I made a few references to the forest lodge arc but that’s it.

okay so the episode opens up in the ol’ villain bar (man I miss this place), with some All Might TV special playing, until Kurogiri switches it off

and now he’s turning to Tomura and they’re just like. staring at each other

and now Tomura is grinning and saying “I figured it out”

again, if you recall, he’s just had the epiphany that his purpose in life is to fuck up the Symbol of Peace in whatever way he can. so he’s pretty happy. I think it was Mark Twain who said, “the two most important days of your life are the day you were born, and the day you go to the mall and realize you just want to make All Might really sad”

so he’s recapping that the reason why Stain and the U.A. Wunderkinds piss him off so much is because of All Might, and All Might pisses him off because he’s always smiling “so thoughtlessly”

and now he’s running off somewhere. probably to plan the kidnapping

alone again, huh Kurogiri

he’s so cute lol

he’s looking at the photo of Izuku that Tomura conveniently left sitting on the counter, and mentally summarizing who Izuku is and what his most notable accomplishments are. because this is lowkey a clip show filler episode to ease people into the anime’s third season. but it’s pretty well done though

and now we’re cutting to Deku’s apartment, and he’s narrating about how they’ve finished their first semester at U.A. and have now started their summer vacation!

au contraire, Deku. this episode begs to differ

so he’s continuing his workouts to prepare for the upcoming training camp

I’m sure that camp is going to go great, by the way

and now we’re getting a flashback to that video of All Might rescuing people. the one that baby Deku loved so much

and he’s thinking about how All Might gave him his power. you know. just to remind anyone who’s only just now tuning in, for whatever reason. and they’re like “what is this weird show and who is this green-haired person who gives me weird Tsuna vibes”

and then the doorbell rings, cutting into his reverie!

and LOOK WHO IT IS

how do you guys know where Deku lives. and you do know that Bakugou also lives just like the next block over, yes? I mean. since you’re here and all

no one would ever do this, by the way. wear a long-sleeved black button-down shirt in Tokyo in August, I mean. but also, no one would just randomly visit someone’s house just to ring the doorbell and invite them to go someplace when they could have just texted them instead

but that is indeed what they are doing! they have come to invite Deku to go with them to the school pool! for training. wink

and now we’re cutting to Vlad and Aizawa as they plan the training camp

but before that, Vlad has a favor he’d like to ask Aizawa

“all twenty of them. in detail. but also, like, don’t take too long, though. just maybe kind of summarize it and give me a presentation that’s roughly, let’s say, about two minutes long”

and Aizawa just agrees. just rolls with it with no hesitation at all

and starts rattling off his students in alphabetical order

meanwhile my mind starts wandering and I start to wonder if Horikoshi intentionally planned it so that Izuku would come directly after Katsuki in an alphabetical list of the class 1-A kids. or if that was just a coincidence. he puts so much thought into the names that I wonder if he rejected any last names that started with an H or a P or a B just so he could do this

anyway now Aizawa is done. it actually took two and a half minutes

obviously there’s no time for that, Aizawa!!

lol and he’s interrupted by Deku, Kami, and Mineta barging in and asking if their request to use the pool was approved

you mean to tell me you guys dragged Deku all the way here and you didn’t even know if it was okayed or not

thankfully, Aizawa says that the school did indeed approve them to use the pool until 5pm

[shifty eyes] yep. endurance training. you know us. fuckin’ love to endure. and train. yessirree

there is no way he actually bought that even for a second, right?

but anyways, he’s telling them to do their best

he probably doesn’t actually care. or he just bought it because Deku was there, which of course was Kami and Mineta’s plan the whole time

and now we’re cutting to the pool, and sweet, innocent Deku genuinely believes they’ve really come here to train. “what a great idea, Mineta!”

he’s also excited because since they’re at school they can also use their quirks

which yeah, I forgot that would normally be forbidden at the ocean or at a municipal pool or whatever. for reasons which will later become apparent in this very episode

anyways, so Kami and Mineta are all, “[shifty eyes] [snrrk] that’s right! PLUS ULTRA”

I fucking love how Deku is just the ultimate rube here

meanwhile Kaminari is telepathically communicating to Mineta that inviting “the diligent Midoriya” was a good call. he really does lend legitimacy to the whole operation

Mineta is telepathically communicating back that if it had just been the two of them, they might not have gotten permission

wow they’re actually having a whole damn conversation in this manner

so now Kaminari (still via telepathy) is asking “by the way, there’s no problem with that, is there?” and Mineta is all “nah I overheard all the girls saying they were gonna meet up at the school pool over the summer break”

except he doesn’t get to the point right away, and we actually see a cute flashback scene with the girls all talking about how the school said they were supposed to refrain from taking any long trips over the summer

meaning that poor Momo had to cancel her vacation plans

sorry Momo, instead you’re just going to have to settle for being attacked by a monster with chainsaw hands, and saving Bakugou’s life. when life gives you lemons

and then they go on to plan the meetup at the pool

and there’s a scene of Mineta and Kaminari fantasizing about the girls in their cute swimsuits. but it’s tainted by Mineta’s perverted aura

and now the two of them are running down the hall heading for their paradise

ONLY TO FIND

oh right, this was the episode when I realized that Iida Tenya and Ryuugazaki Rei = maybe the same person?? I don’t know, what do you guys think. it’s just a theory

anyway so all these cuties are also here

hey hey hey indeed

because it’s The Pool Episode, Mineta. listen, we’re going to see Todoroki without a shirt. whether you like it or not

Deku says that since they were doing endurance training, he messaged everyone to see if they wanted to come

doin’ god’s work there, Deku

and like, we already knew this, guys, but Iida Tenya is fucking ripped. like, he is built. he is SOLID

I’m just saying

now Kaminari is clutching a fist woefully and saying that Deku is too diligent

but Mineta is telling him to calm down and that the girls are still here too

and they are!

hey ladies

anyway so Kaminari is annoyed that they’re not wearing bikinis, but it’s still good enough for Mineta

I don’t know why I’m detailing their antics, but I mean they are responsible for getting us here in their own roundabout way, so

anyway, now this towering Muscle God is coming up to them and congratulating them

it’s like his arms are made of Cotati metal fibers

and now he’s cheerfully lugging them off to come exercise with them

oh wow we’re doing the commercial break thing. so we’re already halfway through the episode. how bout that

so the girls are splashing around with a beach ball and having a blast, and it’s very cute

meanwhile the boys are taking a 15-minute break, and Kami and Mineta are lying on the ground already exhausted

and Iida is opening up a cooler full of orange juice

Kami is bitterly asking why Mineta applied to use the pool for endurance training when they could have gotten permission to use it for sunbathing like the girls did

meanwhile poor Aoyama is shivering and clutching his stomach, having apparently overworked himself

so my takeaway from this though is that his navel laser is waterproof. technology is so cool

Iida’s walking over to Deku and handing him a drink, and now Iida is getting all reflective on how far their friendship has come

which is of course a means of segueing to more flashbacks (of the U.A. entrance exam, and their first battle training exercise at Ground Beta)

and then at the end of all that reminiscing, Kacchan decides to make his grand entrance!

and of course since this is a filler, full Flanderization is in effect, and he’s pretty much immediately establishing his personality as Hates Everyone But Especially Deku by stomping over towards Deku like he wants to fight him for basically no reason

but thankfully this guy’s here too

and of course, Kiri’s own Flanderized personality is basically just The Bakugou Whisperer

Bakugou is all “HEY SHITTY DEKU YOU WANNA SETTLE OUR SCORE RIGHT NOW” lmao

and Deku is all “eh heh, no thanks”

BUT!

Iida Tenya has other ideas!

and now he’s raising his hand high into the air and loudly asking if the other guys want to see which one of them can swim 50 meters the fastest

yesssss Iida. somebody realizes he’s in a filler episode! time to get our pointless competition on!!

and now the music is picking up and the other guys are like “YEAH! THAT’S A GOOD IDEA!”

and the girls are volunteering to help as well! because Momo also realizes she’s in a filler!

Ojiro does not realize he’s in a filler, apparently, if he’s asking a stupid question like this

no, Ojiro, you’re just going to spend the rest of the episode swimming like normal people. pssh. as if. who tf would watch a whole anime just about a bunch of hot guys swimming. who would watch three whole seasons of that. who would watch three seasons and four movies of that. god, Ojiro

anyway, Iida is like, yes, duh, quirks

Bakugou is grinning and stomping over to Deku and he’s all “I’LL CRUSH YOU, DEKU.” because you know Bakugou. all day long, he’s just, “gotta crush that Deku!” all day erryday

oh wait, and we can’t forget about that other guy too

“why am I involved in this, I was just sitting here quietly”

so now that we’ve established how Bakugou wants to crush everyone, we’re cutting to our first race!

and it’s Mineta, Tokoyami, Kouda, Bakugou, and Kaminari

Momo’s telling them to take their marks

and of course, as soon as she blows her whistle, Bakugou activates his quirk and just blasts off to the other side

Kiri and Sero are all WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘HOW WAS THAT’, YOU DIDN’T EVEN SWIM

and Bakugou is all

which is honestly the best joke of the entire episode ngl

so then next are Satou, Kirishima, Sero, Aoyama, and Todoroki

and given what we just saw from Bakugou, it’s pretty obvious what’s about to happen here

thank you filler gods

and then Iida, Deku, Ojiro, and Shouji

and by this point you have to figure that Shouji and Ojiro already know they’re screwed

amazingly, even though Iida activates Recipro, Deku still somehow beats him to the other side. we’ll all agree this is blatantly impossible and that Iida for whatever reason just let him win. Iida would have already been at the other side of the pool before Deku could even fucking say the words “full cowl”

and now Todoroki is watching Deku help Iida out of the pool, and he’s flashing back to the sports festival when Deku broke all of his fingers in the name of love and friendship

lol and Iida’s flashing back to all that Hero Killer arc stuff

it’s so dramatic. you’re at the fucking pool guys. calm the fuck down

then for some reason we briefly cut over to the police station where Naomasa is showing All Might a slideshow of stuff that he already knows, and summing up the rest of the League of Villains’ activities up to this point

and now we’re back at the pool where the three main char -- I mean, the winners of the previous three heats, Deku, Bakugou, and Todoroki, are going to race each other for first place

and Bakugou’s telling Todo not to hold back like he did at the sports festival! and Deku too!

and they’re all lining up! and their squads are cheering them on!

baby~ this is what you came for~

and Iida blows the whistle, and they all leap into the air -- !

BUT THEN

oh my god I forgot about this part

I’m laughing so hard

and everyone is all WHAAAA

and Sero is holding up his hands in confusion and he’s all “their quirks were erased?”, as though it’s a complete and utter mystery how something like that could ever possibly happen!

and then this mofo walks in announcing that it’s now 5pm

and he’s telling them all to go home

they’re starting to argue with him that they just got to the good part

but Aizawa is all

and they’re all “LOL NOPE”

so then we cut to Bakugou and Kirishima walking home, and Bakugou is complaining about how Aizawa stopped the race

and he’s thinking that he won’t lose to Todoroki and Deku

and meanwhile Deku is standing on Dagobah beach, and All Might walks up to him

and there are a few more quick flashbacks about One for All being passed down to Deku, blah blah blah

and then All Might is all “Midoriya-shounen, the training camp will be tough,” which may just be the most hilarious understatement of all time

and that’s it! that’s the episode!

I gotta say, even with it basically being just an excuse for flashbacks, I still enjoyed this ep even on the second go-around. this should be a template for all future BnHA anime filler. just have all the class 1-A kids hanging around doing stupid stuff. that’s it. I’m easy to please lol