#meanwhile all i want is to explore their (usually canon) dynamic further

[chatdomestique]

I think shipping culture would be a lot less centralized in fandom if we actually had a way to separate types of relationships and interactions so we can actually explore different types of character interactions without conflating all of them with sex/romance. We need platonic “ship” tags.

What I would like to propose is:

Make “character/character” refer to all character interactions and relationships regardless of type

Keep “character x character” for romantic/sexual ships

Use “character v character” for rival and enemy relationships (v = versus)

Use “character + character” for platonic and familial relationships

[x-neurotoxin-x]

Can ur new fic be read alone or do I have to read the series it's in? I want to check it out but haven't gotten the chance to read the other parts

Yeah, i try to make each fic work as a stand alone, though it's better to read as a part of the series, there's usually enough context and references to the previous part that theoretically you could jump in on the current part and hopefully not be too confused. Beginning of recent fics, i do include a small refresher/catch up section in the author's notes explaining the story so far.

If you're interested and don't mind spoilers for the series if you haven't read previous parts, I'll include a breakdown of everything under the cut :))

(TW/CW - mentions of domestic violence, unhealthy/abusive relationships, dubcon, noncon, drugging, power imbalance, past csa, past csem, past incest, coercion, torture, medical trauma, trafficking/forced prostitution, mental health issues including age regression, programming, sh, suicidal behavior, etc)

Overall plot: Paper Bag verse follows canon in the background timeline wise but it's not completely canon compliant. The series centers mostly around shigadabi with background spinaraki and spinnerdabi, and eventual spinarakidabi and explores their relationships and traumas as they spiral into deeper and deeper into unhealthy dynamics.

Individual fics and storyline:

Parts 1-3; Lights, Camera, Action , Mean , and I think worms and rats are living where my brain used to be centers primarily around Dabi, shigadabi and establish the relationship between them while also foreshadowing Spinner's later role in the series and the dynamics he builds with Shigaraki and Dabi.

The series opens with shigadabi being in an established casual sexual relationship that mostly serves as a means to an end/pass time for both of them. Tomura begins pushing boundaries within their relationship by filming/taking explicit photos of Dabi during their encounters, which triggers trauma responses from Dabi's past. It's revealed early on that Touya was sexually abused and exploited by his father and the hero commission as a child, and developed programmed responses and mental issues due to it, including a dissociative disorder which usually causes him to age regress and further complicates things as Tomura, for at least a while, isn't really sure why Dabi acts the way he does while they're sleeping together yet keeps triggering the same responses out of him-- sometimes intentionally, sometimes not.

In Mean, the League is homeless and on the run after the bar raid and during the overhaul arc. Things escalate when Shigaraki kinda starts venting his frustration over afo and Kurogiri being arrested and the league's current predicament onto Dabi by beating and assaulting him to get his anger out, and eventually trafficking him and forcing him into prostitution for money for supplies and resources. Touya starts further projecting his Daddy issues onto Tomura due to seeing similiarities (Enji took advantage of Touya's grooming and took his anger out on him frequently as a kid, then pushed him into the trafficking to "make Touya make up for not being able to be a hero). Tomura finds out about Dabi's past by basically forcing him to trauma dump about it while he's drugged. Tomura also has some issues himself, having been raised to be desensitized to violence, torture, and rape by all for one via being forced to witness and participate in such things from a young age, Tomura doesn't really grasp the heaviness of what he's being told and takes advantage of Dabi's trauma to establish control over him.

Meanwhile, the rest of the League is not really aware of the issues Tomura and Dabi are having in their relationship, but Shuichi starts catching onto things when Touya starts hanging around with him while regressed after incidents between him and Tomura.

Part 4-5; Scraped Knees and Codependency pulls Spinner into the mix and establishes a casual fwb sort of dynamic beginning between Tomura and Shuichi while further developing a friendship between Dabi and Spinner.

In scraped knees, Tomura's possessive streak causes him to get closer to Shuichi to try and figure out why Dabi/Touya hangs around him, and Shuichi starts to catch Tomura's interest when he notices Shuichi's got some serious insecurities, relationship inexperience, and is pretty desperate for positive interaction. This leads him to manipulate him into a sexual relationship by drugging him, coercing him, and then gaslighting him about boundaries being overstepped. Shuichi's lack of healthy relationship experience and general self worth makes him easy for Tomura to take advantage of. Dabi's not really happy with this, and he kinda starts noticing Tomura's doing similar things with Shuichi that he did with him, but Tomura writes it off as Dabi being jealous and worried about being replaced.

In Codependency, Tomura starts trying to further look into Dabi's past when curiosity gets the better of him. He knows some from what Dabi told him in Mean, but wants to find out more. He cashes in a favor with Dr. Ujiko, knowing that Afo and Ujiko know of Dabi's past since he was in the facility, and Ujiko sends Tomura leaked csem videos of Touya when he was a kid. It's through these videos that Tomura figures out Dabi was programmed through grooming and torture/drug-based-mind-control by the Commission and takes note of his cues and triggers shown in the videos.

He later tests some of the cues out on Dabi, and basically causes him to shut down completely. Tomura, drunk on power, ends up doing some really awful shit to Dabi to "test how far he can take it."

Dabi is hardly able to remember anything while under the influence of the programming, and when he confronts Tomura about what happened, Tomura tells him everything in detail and gaslights him about it when he gets mad, saying that he didn't fight back or tell him to stop, so he figured Dabi was okay with it.

Dabi's pissed about this and feels violated and all, so he threatens to leave which starts a whole fight because Tomura's control and abandonment issues are like "oh hell no you can't just leave me." Tomura uses some guilt trippy tactics, threatens suicide and cuts himself, but Dabi's low empathy swag makes it not very effective, then it turns into physical aggression and abuse, but before it gets too far, Shuichi interrupts and is like "whoa wtf are you guys doing? 😰 calm down"

Without knowing much of any context for this, Shuichi tries to kinda play mediator between them. Tomura lowkey lies/downplays it as them getting into a mutual fight and Dabi threatening to leave while also kinda playing the victim. Dabi doesn't attempt to defend himself or explain what's actually going on so that doesn't help. So Shuichi ends up thinking they just have some really bad communication problems and writes off the signs of abuse as mutual toxicity. That coupled with Tomura's abuse earlier ends up convincing Dabi to stay.

Part 6; Gold is the longest fic in the series and arguably the most plot heavy. It centers around Shigadabi's dynamic spiraling to some really fucked up levels and begins to fully establish poly spinarakidabi.

Spinarakis on again off again fwb dynamic continues, and Tomura decides to try to pull him into stuff with Dabi. He kinda gets the impression that Dabi and Spinner are into each other and because he's got massive control issues if they're gonna fuck he wants them to fuck on his terms only. So he goes about pressuring Spinner to have sex with Dabi while Dabi's drugged and unconscious. Spinner gets really uncomfortable with this and refuses, and Tomura pushes and pushes until he gets fed up and ends up forcing himself on Shuichi.

Dabi wakes up later to Shuichi a whole mess and tries to figure out what happened, then gets really pissed about it.

He goes to confront Tomura about it after taking care of Shuichi, but Tomura's casual as always and doesn't seem to think he did anything wrong. Dabi loses it and snaps because of everything, attacks Tomura, burns him, and they get into a fight which Shigaraki ends up on the upper hand of. Tomura's hella pissed Dabi actually went off on him, drags him into the bathroom to use the shower to keep him from being able to use his quirk, then basically loses it on him.

Tomura kinda snaps after that because he registers Dabi fighting back and being defiant as losing control over him, and he gets this twisted idea to break Dabi down mentally enough that Dabi won't refuse or defy him anymore. He then spends, like, a week heavy drugging Dabi and torturing him in his private bathroom through waterboarding, dehumanization, a fuck ton of sexual torture, and basically retraumatizing him until he breaks mentally and doesn't resist anymore.

Once Tomura decides he's good and broken enough, Dabi's kind of a mess from all the torture and needs medical attention so he takes him to Ujiko where, surprise, he's abused even more but given medical attention.

While this is happening, they make arrangements for Tomura's quirk upgrade operation, which Dabi doesn't like the sound of. He tries to warn Tomura that its shady and afo/Ujiko are using and manipulating him but Tomura won't have none of it, too shaken up by the idea of being replaced or tossed aside by afo after learning about the spares to think about defying him.

Meanwhile nobody's aware this that this is happening behind the scenes and Tomura uses the time outside of PLF business and fucking with Dabi to further manipulate Shuichi. He gaslights Shuichi about what he did to him before (the whole "you won't fuck Dabi while he's unconscious so I'm gonna noncon you") and then twists the situation with Dabi into sympathy points for himself, saying Dabi attacked and burned him (and conveniently leaves out that he's currently got him tied up and drugged in his bathroom) which makes Shuichi feel bad and blame himself for "overreacting and making them fight."

Tomura also writes off Dabi being MIA by making up a story about him being off with Geten doing stuff with their regiment. Shuichi later secondguesses this when he asks Geten about it and Geten got no idea what he's talking about or where Dabi is, but by the time Dabi's allowed, like, freedom, both Tomura and Dabi himself double down on the lie and claim he was out doing villain stuff, excusing his injuries as battle wounds from that despite them clearly not being that.

Dabi doesn't wanna be alone after everything he went through so tries to hang out and drink with Spinner. Tomura ruins it though, coming in on them and forces them into a threesome by playing it off as "I can tell you two like each other so I wanna see you fuck." It's all awful, but Dabi's too broken by now to even realize it let alone do anything about it and Spinner knows something is wrong but any attempts at stopping things or trying to do something about it gets shut down and he's basically forced to go along with it.

Tomura gets the feeling he went too far during it and covers his ass with more manipulation and gaslighting, which goes fine with Dabi but now Shuichi's not liking the way things are going and tries to establish boundaries and shit. Tomura more or less says he's gonna try, but doesn't really mean it, and just writes everything off as "well you're the odd one out Dabi and I thought all this was normal wtf" he also explains away the level of abuse and violence during it as a kink thing, basically tells Shuichi that both him amd Dabi are into cnc and rough sex with dom/sub dynamics and Dabi "likes it and wants him to do it," and it's mostly him with the kinks. Dabi kinda just goes along with it because, again, he got mindbroken.

Part 7; I'm Gonna Infest Your Brain is a shorter glimpse into the poly relationship developing and starts to explore dynamics between them all together while also setting up stuff for Tomura's operation.

Shuichi asks Dabi on a low-key date which he at first doesnt invite Tomura to because Tomura's been stressed af with the upcomimg surgery. Tomura's pissed about it when he finds out and not only belittles the idea over and over to Shuichi but also kinda puts him in the position where he feels like he has to invite Tomura along bc Tomura's obv talking out of jealousy and feels left out.

Both Dabi and Spinner come into this thinking it's more of a casual hang out not-quite-a-date date, but Tomura comes in, well, prepared to fuck with them bc he's insecure and thinks he's losing control of them, esp with the surgery coming up and knowing he won't have access to them for a couple months.

He gets them both super drunk then uses Dabi's cues like it's a party trick to "show Shuichi how cool it is." Shuichi is kinda freaked out but the more he freaks out about it the more forceful Tomura gets. Shuichi tries to, like, be gentle and stuff because despite thinking this is all a kink thing and not really grasping its abuse, he wants sex in a different way than they're doing it. Tomura however only gets more abusive towards Dabi while Dabi's in that state of mind because he'll basically just take whatever he's given. Shuichi's uncomfortable with it but Tomura forces him into a bunch of shit anyway (makes him watch him fuck Dabi, makes him give Dabi oral and fuck him, basically keeps going and going until Shuichi's begging him to let them both take a break.)

When he finally let's them chill Touya's already age regressed and a whole mess and Shuichi gives him aftercare while trying not to feel like his whole nights plans got ruined. He's kinda pissed at Tomura for the way he treats them and gets snappy about it. Hes still freaked out about the doll programming cues and stuff, and when he asks about it Tomura makes Touya tell Shuichi about his csa and csem and childhood trauma, then explains they're "doing all this to help Dabi work through his trauma" and that Touya asked him to do this. This is a blatant lie, but again, Touya just goes along with it.

This makes Shuichi even more uncomfortable with stuff bc he didn't know about any of that and now feels like they're just reenacting Dabi's abuse. Neither of them really listen to his concerns though, and he kinda freaks out when Tomura wants to go another round-- esp since Touya is in real bad shape and having basically a mental breakdown, Shuichi doesn't want him to drop further but Tomura's so pushy about fucking him anyway that Spinner kinda gives in and tells Shig to fuck him instead to at least give Touya a break. Shig does that and he's really mean and gross, makes Touya watch and touch himself as he hurts Shuichi and degrades them both.

Shuichi's really really upset after and snaps, and him and Tomura start arguing which turns into Tomura kinda having a breakdown both because a part of him legit feels bad/confused about why he does this shit and also his usual gaslighting/manipulation shit. Dabi feels bad they're fighting and ends up lying to take the blame for everything, saying it was all his idea when it wasnt, which creates a rift between him and Shuichi now too. Tomura gets mad and leaves, Dabi and Shu loom there in sad awkward silence for a bit then Dabi leaves too and Shuichi has a breakdown.

The 8th part; Star Tripping I'm not gonna spoil much since it just started but it will follow the days leading up to Tomura's operation and the months following after. This one will end up being the first one in the series that's more spinnerdabi focused than anything else as they try to explore their relationship without Tomura constantly getting involved, but also delves into the codependency and toxicity in the relationships between all three of them, Tomura's rising guilt about how he's treating the other two, the risk Tomura's taking with the operation and how Dabi and Shuichi handle it. There's a lot planned for this one and it ( hopefully ) won't be as heavy as previous ones but still will keep a lotta the same themes.

[transhawks]

I got into dabi*hawks because of the potential of rivals/enemies-to-lovers and I thought they could have really interesting interactions and fics involving them could delve into some really interesting areas about morality and the grey areas (and the fact that they’re basically foils, a son of a villain who became a hero blinded to certain shortcomings and the son of a hero who became a villain because that was all he saw, yet they share similarities in their fucked up childhoods and the fact they’re basically going further down ‘bad’ paths in the current chapters, the fact they’re on different sides but in another life in another context in different events they may have been able to relate to each other..)..all to say I basically just started liking it because the idea of them interacting and their dynamic was interesting especially if they’re forced to consider the other’s views and work together (hawks in general I’m a big fan of vigilante or villain fics where he becomes more against how fucked hero society is and decides to take an alternate path to fix it) and I think hawks deciding to take more of the villains’ side is a more interesting plot line than if he ultimately dies trying to make up for his mistakes a hero, but..I feel like with how popular dabi*hawks got people think people only ship it because it’s hot or whatever and the view of it has significantly tipped down to where people get made fun of. (even though I feel hero/villain pairings are popular for a lot of these reasons in basically any media.) I have no idea where I was going with this when I started typing but I wanted to express my appreciation for finding a blog that can both like the content while neither pretending canon events didn’t happen/justifying bad things either one did nor acting like dabi*hawks fans are rabid yaoi fans who “ignore canon for their hot ship” or support abuse (I’ve never understood that one, they’re on opposite sides in canon and of course are going to fight, it’s not an interpersonal relationship in canon, so that’s basically saying all enemies to lovers is abuse regardless of context for no real reason, which is like of insulting as an abuse survivor)

One, the immense popularity, and subsequent lack of quality of shipping (as with everything, not everything made is good, and a lot of it isn't meant to be 'good' as you or I define it) does in fact give people the wrong perception or a very skewed one.

Additionally, some Dabihawks fans are in a bit of a tight spot where very hero-approving Hawks fans, the type who think he did nothing wrong, think the pairing is just a bunch of denial of little substance, meanwhile the other of the spectrum, a lot of hard-core villain stans hate it due to Hawks not living up to a lot of the 'promise' much of us saw early on.

And you talk about that promise; hit it dead on. Hawks's narrative is fascinating due to a lot of the could haves. It's why he is so richly paralleling most of the League. It's why his character is so goddamn complex.

Dabihawks started as a joke you know, I remember it. I was still new in the fandom and skipping ahead because I hate the overhaul arc when Hawks debuted. And at that point I hadn't really focused too much on the villains besides liking Dabi for being very obviously connected to Shouto, but Mirshroom kind of drew a "what if hawks and dabi went to hero school together and knew each other" thing even before we knew Hawks was a spy, and we all started calling it hotwings and thinking of the irony since Hawks was a walking icarus parallel to us...

And then.. The narrative happened.

Suddenly we were embroiled in a spy plot, and an intriguing story of a boy forced to become a hero who looked up to Endeavor, and Endeavor's likely son, born to be a hero but couldn't be one, so he became a villain. And Hawks had to work with him, pretend to be a villain.

It was beautiful.

It is beautiful.

It's gotten so much better: Hawks, the son of a villain, saved by Enji. Dabi, who has ruined Hawks's life, and yet, managed to free his shackles by destroying the cage, and yet Hawks will go back and defend the man he feels created him.

Even people who hate the pairing, and there are many good reasons I can list of stuff I don't care for in portrayals, might find it hard to deny; the setup reads like a Greek tragedy.

It reads like an epic romance novel.

And no one says those end happily, in fact, the appeal is, that they usually don't but so much of what affects us in the end is the knowledge it could have.

The clashing of two different ideologies, two perceptions of wrong and right, of justice.. One boy who was 'saved', one who wasn't.

There's so much richness that can be mined in the dynamic.

And, I guess, many are let down by canon not delivering. First off, clearly whatever this stuff between Hawks and Dabi is, it's still happening. There's unanswered questions and Horikoshi did not choose to end 299 and 300 in the exact same panel for both of them for nothing.

Whatever Hawks's fate is, it's tied to Dabi. It's tied to the Todoroki storyline. We don't know what will happen. There's been so many fics early on of us predicting one will try to kill the other - usually Dabi, and it's happened, but it might happen in reverse. That Hawks might try and kill Dabi.

The more optimistic among us, like me, can hope that Hawks somehow redeems himself by returning to his real origins - not of loving Endeavor, but being the boy who saved people he didn't know. By actually beinf a hero and saving someone who by all accounts shouldn't be saved, even if it means his life.

Even this far, through this much, can't you see how there's still so much ifs and can happens?

That's the beauty of it.

This is not a post, I think, saying other pairings are worse, or lack these qualities. Because that isn't true. But it is a post explaining why, even in the swamp of awful out of character portrayals, or people undervaluing the importance of the League, or ignorant inconvenient truths about Hawks's motivations and character, there is still so much promise and beauty in dabihawks. It's why I still ship it, and why I likely will until the end.

It's not happy. It's not neat. Like most enemies to lovers ships, there is messiness. But canon has provided a framework full of potential and exploration. And that's why it's still here as a ship.

Because we see the beauty in it.

[faketextsfromlastmight]

Best of tags #12

 A compilation of my favorite reactions to this blog

@re-bon-bon-san on Todoroki’s behavior: (Link)

I thought Todoroki would be passive agressive but this is even better hahahahah

I don’t really see Todoroki as the passive-agressive type though... From what we’ve seen, Todoroki acts pretty blunt and emotionless when he doesn’t like something and isn’t afraid to show it. Then there are the sudden bursts of anger which contrast with his usual behavior and tend to happen when he’s REALLY pissed off.

@eternalflameprincess on Midoriya’s father: (Link)

#when will hisashi return from the war#he's a bastard until proven otherwise

At this point we know more about Ash Ketchum’s father than Izuku’s. This is a red flag. His child seems to have gone through heavy psychological duress as a child, growing up without a quirk, and yet he seems to have been rarely present. Even when Izuku gets seriously hurt and targeted by a terrorist organization, he’s not even mentioned. Inko has to carry the burden of making decisions regarding Izuku and meeting with All Might alone.

I guess it’s pretty current for parents of shonen anime protagonists to not be mentioned unless the plot requires it (e.g. Yugi Mutoh) but that only works on the premise that the parents are not really aware of their children’s shenanigans. But Inko has actually pretty good knowledge of what Izuku suffered. Why not involve his father as well?

@iprincezzinuyoukai​ on Shouto trying on a wedding dress: (Link)

#he would make an awesome bride...

Oh god, are you kidding? Shouto is Japanese for “bridezilla”.

@thatawkwardotaku​ on Aoyama’s French curse words: (Link)

Oh La la, Aoyama sonne comme un Quebecois 👀

Does he? I was aiming more towards a vulgar Parisian but I guess the grammar is kind of québécois-sounding.

@stephaliceslytherin​ on Aoyama using the word “écorcher”: (Link)

I must say I am not used to this verb being used in this sentence,  I woud have use "défonce" ^^.

You are correct, “défoncer” would be the go-to verb to use in this sentence for a standard French speaker. But I wanted something more threatening and specific because Aoyama is very extra.

@deku-secretlovechild on Deku being a stalker: (Link)

#i fuckin love oddly stalkerish deku hes so weird

Horikoshi made fun of Midoriya stalking Bakugou during their middle-school years in Smash (Link), so it’s semi-canonical!

@unappreciatedeggs on Aizawa naming his cat All Meowght: (Link)

All Meowght... how flattered would Toshinori be tho?

Eraserhead’s opinion of All Might be summarized as “like the man, hate his fandom”. That is something Toshinori would have to learn.

@lunarapocolypse on Mitsuki overpraising Midoriya: (Link)

....Okay, I know this is a lighthearted post, but this is exactly what my parents do. Comparing me to someone else to the point I start irrationally hating them. I’m confused at their motives now.

It’s a common parental fallacy, yeah. I think that, being the class nerd and an outcast, Midoriya severely underestimated his social intelligence. It’s pretty telling he immediately becomes a popular kid the moment Bakugou’s not at the top of the social ladder to put him down. Basically Midoriya is talented at making friends while Bakugou only seems to attract sycophants (up until his budding friendship with Kirishima, that is). Bakugou knew this from an early age and this envy is key to understanding how much he hated Midoriya. But Mitsuki overpraising Midoriya’s social skills in the privacy of Bakugou’s home would also explain a lot in this regard.

Interestingly the divide between Bakugou and Midoriya is probably mirrored by the divide between Mitsuki and Inko. Mitsuki probably envied Inko for having a calm, easygoing child who did as he was told. Meanwhile Inko probably envied Mitsuki for having a child with a powerful quirk who would “have it easy” in life.

@superbeenyrants on Bakugou’s communication problems: (Link)

I’m convinced several of Bakugou’s communication/behavioral issues with Deku actually stem from his troubled relationship with Mitsuki giving him a screwed up understanding of how you treat people you have an intimate, family-like relationship with, and especially how you settle frustrations with them. Judging by how Hori depicts them, it’s “screaming and hitting”. (Which completely explains the decision to have Bakugou’s dynamic with Mitsuki revealed before “Deku vs Kacchan 2″.)

Absolutely. The Remedial Arc pretty much confirms this with everyone criticizing the way Bakugou handles childcare “the way he was raised” (his own words). It takes Todoroki (whose history of abuse Bakugou is aware of) to convince him to change his behavior. Basically Horikoshi is laying the foundation of Mitsuki’s dismal parenting style as a freudian excuse for Bakugou’s pathological aggressivity. I hope this is explored further in a story arc, but we’ll see.

I guess Bakugou was raised with several ideas in mind, including but not limited to:

Violence is an acceptable way of expressing yourself,

Using violence against someone is an opportunity to teach that person a valuable lesson,

Showing weakness is always bad,

If you get hurt, it’s because you were too weak.

There’s a clear parallel between Bakugou telling Midoriya he’d better jump off a roof and Mitsuki telling her son he got kidnapped by the equivalent of Daesh because he was too weak. Bakugou is mirroring the violence to which he was always exposed.

@tumbling---star on Eraserhead’s holding Tokoyami’s birthday cake: (Link)

#since tokoyami is aizawas favorite student and all

Hey! Shouta Aizawa doesn’t play favorites. He despises all his students equally.

@janazzaa on Todoroki selling his own bathwater: (Link)

You know he would!! The real question is if he saves it for lunch.

#That makes the soba slurping chapter with Natsuo and Fuyumi very uncomfortable

So now the soba water is in Todoroki, who will thereafter take another soba bath, whose water he will drink, and so on, and so on, ad infinitum. It’s the circle of life, and it moves us all. So sayeth the Book of Shouto. For thou were made from soba water, and to soba water thou shalt return, for now and forever, Amen.

[thewolfisawake]

The Tales series if you haven't gotten it already

Favorite character:

Undeniably goes to Yuri and Velvet. What can I say? I’m into the dark-haired protagonists that ‘aren’t like the others.’ I can get onboard with why they come to the conclusions they do even if I don’t think it’s write. With Yuri, I admire the ability to do when others cannot. And can’t deny, he made me laugh the most with his sense of sarcasm and panache. Plus that voice...Troy Baker, they did you dirty. Meanwhile with Velvet I was like ‘yes, let’s be married in this quaint little town together’ in the beginning. She was just cute. Then it became attraction of ‘I don’t give a damn what happens to this world so long as I get what I want’ and ferocity. 

Least Favorite character:

Emeraude. Like what the fuck is your problem lady? You’re getting jealous of a child. Your feelings towards someone should be directed towards that person, not abusing some third-party that doesn’t even understand what you two have going on. 

Cumore. Fuck him too. For a side character that you don’t even really fight, he’s a real ass that his death was catharsis. Pure catharsis. There was no a single moment that he showed any redemption. He was a cruel bastard that held no regard for human life. He was willing to make excuses for anyone under him to get in trouble. He lied to people to enslave them and work them to death. He dragged people into the desert to look for an impossible item and left them without resources to die. Fuck him so much. He might’ve been cartoonishly evil compared to some not nice guys but those actions translate to atrocities. 

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon):

Selfish Coexistence (Basically the Berseria Party) - Their relationships seem so hard to define to me as they all use each other for various reasons. They also seem to develop care through their selfishness and all of the either are like *shrug* guess we’re doing this now or ‘what is this I’m feeling?’ ‘emotions?’ ‘disgusting.’ There’s an understood protection amongst all of them and then a fierce rationalization for their action rather than saying ‘because I like you okay!’ They’re very smart yet they’re all dumbasses and I love them all.

Ludju - You know what’s better than one adorkable dumbass? Two adorkable dumbasses. I like Ludger and Jude’s relation better than any I have unlocked during the story. Jude by nature is very caring but it just is different with Ludger? Main thing I can note is that Jude touches Ludger a lot. Like a firm, ‘I’m right here’ shoulder touch. A nudge in the arm. Catching when about to faint. And I just don’t see Jude do the same with anyone in his party in either game.  I just find their interactions from the extra scenes are really cute.

 Velvet/Niko - “If you were a boy, I think I’d be in love.” Gurl she don’t have to be a boy to kiss fall in love. Shipping a Main Character with an NPC? Is it madness? Absolutely. But I had feelings about that from the very beginning. Like this could’ve been so fucking sweet. Could’ve had it all. And then the Advent happened. 

Alvin/Presa - Oh man. Ooooh man. This was just a curiosity on the way of Tale’s of Xillia’s path. Like it was a lady that lent to Alvin’s skeevy or ladykiller vibe he gave off. And it was like was she just a jilted one-time or something else? And the answer seemed like ‘something else’ but didn’t know what. It was a little ‘wonder how that went...’ Then you do Tales of Xillia 2 and I thought I was wrecked. Because it reframes so much of their interaction to a really sad relationship that fell apart because Alvin was a coward. 

Flynn/Yuri/Judith - Haha! Didn’t expect the end part of this one did you? I think everyone knew I liked Fluri. Like their dynamics are so interesting. But I really do enjoy Judy being involved. I’m really sad that Judy and Flynn don’t get much interaction even in the PS3 version but I don’t find it hard for them to get along. But I do usually see that more times it’s Flynn and Judy dating Yuri and their relationship changes over time.  They can scrap together, they can travel together, and not needing as much talking to get what anyone means. I find it hard to describe this one but I feel it. 

Character I find most attractive:

Yuri and Velvet are like the reflexive thoughts. But I actually really also like Jude and Judy. I mean look at this cute little nerd, he’s adorable! And then there’s hot elf lady that she could kick me in the face and I’d thank her. In general you can probably guess my type from those four.

Character I would marry:

Probably Yuri. I’m sorry that this is my answer to so many but he is like my type to a T and it’s just ruined so many standards for me. Like a funny guy that is good at cooking (and has a sweet tooth!) and can go venturing with? What else is there? I mean yeah there’s the hair and voice but that’s like given. But yeah, I’m a basic bitch with that.

Character I would be best friends with:

Eizen, if that’s a bit surprising. Sure he’s a bit of an edgelord but I feel like I’ve never left it so he’s already doing better than I. But I like the idea of sailing on the ship with him there, probably not gonna be able to let me struggle for that long. He’s funny with a dry sense of humor to me and also he’s a low-key nerd that knows a lot of things and likes finding new and interesting things. So yeah. 

And as much as I give shit about him, I actually think I would be friends with Sorey. He’s the kind of excitable that makes others excited and that’s kind of what I do. So we’d kind of excite each other. And so long as it’s not spelunking, I’m down for going exploring. 

a random thought:

What defenses occur with the end of blastia? Barriers were what repelled monsters from most of the inhabited areas in Terca Lumireis. Dahngrest and Zaphias look to have fortresses that can hold back most land beasts. But there are other places. What stops the monsters now? Will they go towards more mana based works? 

Also, someone also mentioned, does ANYONE know how to do medical work? Like actually patching up injuries? How to care for someone in sickness? Healing artes were what were used! They can’t use blastia anymore! What happens now?

Can there be a history of how things changed from Berseria to Zestiria? Mainly the shifting of how malevolence works from turning people to reflect their sinister nature to straight up monsters with no sense? How the Shepherd thing went to include the malak as much as it does. The change from malak to seraphim. Just...how did we geeeetttttt heeeerrreeeeee.

An unpopular opinion:

I fucking hate that I had to be told from other friends that actually could find the material or read the fucking wiki to understand the dynamics of the Kresnik family. Ludger has a LOT of fucking baggage that we don’t even get to hear anything about! Partially because he’s silent and partially because ‘oh he was young so he conveniently forgot?’ And a lot of it was important to the last half of the story! That’s bullshit! And even further bullshit is that there was no reason they couldn’t have found time to put it in the game but they chose not to. 

Tales can’t make a fun last level to save their lives. I haven’t enjoyed a single final level in any of the games I’ve played. I don’t mind doing puzzles for it but straight up spiraling branches full of dead ends is frustrating. ESPECIALLY FUCK XILLIA 2′s! Randomly generated based off those in the party and then you can’t even see when a path is not truly there so you can follow the path and then all of suddenly blank ground, meaning dead end you have back up and retrace another path. And then like Berseria’s made me feel nauseous from the ‘ethereal’ look it was going for. And just made it hard as fuck to see. And more of this awful tower climbing. I just...mmmmmmm, I will probably always enjoy the game until the final level exists. I swear.

My Canon OTP:

Uuuuuuhhhhhh I don’t think I have one. 

My Non-canon OTP:

Most protags x happiness?

Most Badass Character:

Don Whitehorse. He was like definition of like ‘stubborn old man’ but man was he cool. He was staunch in the honor of the guilds under his control and was proud of what he and other had built up with their own hands. Also you don’t often see a man willing to sacrifice his life to right a wrong done by his own. 

Most Epic Villain:

Gaius. Like me and my friend were like ‘what the fuck’ when we were co-oping Xillia together. Like this was a king that meant business! Mhm. .

Pairing I am not a fan of:

Most of the pairings are fine to me. 

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another):

Sorey. I’m sure I’ve gone on this so many times but I really hated that they kept alluding to him having to make hard decisions but whenever one was brought to him, someone else took it for him. Like if his job is that important and it’s expected to make these choices, THEN LET HIM MAKE THEM. I was so angry over that. I spent the entire game waiting for when they’d do a major point where Sorey had no choice but to step up. 

Favourite Friendship:

Alvin & Elize - I really like how much they have both grown from each other. And how when Alvin broke her trust that he had to live with her mistrust and work to earn it back. Their friendship had uneasiness that seemed hopeful at the end of the first game and turned to just banter and teasing by the second. Growth baby, it’s wonderful.

Character I most identify with:

Mmmmm, probably Ludger. Look at all that debt. Can’t do nothing but cry over it.

Character I wish I could be:

Yeah, no. JRPG rules means everyone has some fucked up shit in their past or coming for them. I’m fine over here.