#me: legendary edition

[thornheartless]

Commander Shepard here with another unboxing video! This time we've got, uhhh-

[The camera pans over to a cryopod.]

A prothean.

[kaorinndesu]

talk to you later

[moonlightkiwi]

juno shepard | mass effect 2

[pibbiscus]

Getting so excited to play Mass Effect again. EA is kinda shitty so it's taking like a week to download. I cannot WAIT for this gay Garrus mod, even if there's no voice for Shepard I've just been waiting so long for this

[thornetabris]

sigh here we go again

[macabreyan]

this's sooo cute 😍

[halliefiedkx]

Khalisah: Commander Shepard? Khalisah bint Sinan Al Jalani, isn't it true that you were on Earth when the Reapers attacked? How do you justify running away while millions of people on Earth die? Is that the best we can expect from the Alliance?

CS: I came to get help for Earth, for everyone.

Khalisah: What about all the people suffering while you play politics with the Council? What about them? How can you stand here while our families die? What are you going to do?

CS: So I should've stayed and died with them, is that what you're getting at? Hell, if it is, let me tell you I'd have preferred it. Three years I've been telling this galaxy to get their heads outta their asses but Earth gets hit and they ship me here like it's gonna make a lick of difference now... but you know what, Khalisah? I am here, and I'm gonna do my damned best to get the help we need. What exactly have you been doing for Earth?

[monowires]

commander john shepard, eden prime.

[lift-heavy-be-gay]

me omw to romance any fem npc

[thornheartless]

I'm incapable of playing this game without going and seeing him

[kaorinndesu]

Guess who is playing Mass Effect again

[onefey]

you're going about your normal day when, suddenly, surprise! you've been pokémon mystery dungeon'd!

unfortunately, due to budget cuts, the pokémon assigning quiz has been canceled. instead, you must spin THE WHEEL, assigning you a random, unevolved, non-legendary and non-mythical pokémon. you must now go on some sort of world-saving adventure as this pokémon. good luck!

tell me in the tags what you rolled, and how you feel about it - for bonus points, you can spin the wheel again for (or just take your pick of) a pokémon to be your partner.

bonus rules:

you're not shiny unless the wheel tells you you're shiny

take your pick of regional forms and evolutions (for example, if you roll vulpix, it's up to you whether that means normal or alolan vulpix)

apply whatever logic you like with regards to gender

have fun and be yourself!

[agentc0rn]

Flightless angel

[macabreyan]

I thought I was prepared for this scene

but no

[madamedramatics]

A scenario where Shepard jokes with Vega, saying she's practically Garrus' wife now after she promotes him to her XO during the war, resulting in them unintentionally spending a lot more time together.

The joke goes over Vega's head, and he goes to congratulate Garrus personally. Garrus is confused, and Vega promises to keep the "secret marriage" a secret. Garrus now has to figure out how in the hell he accidentally proposed to and married a human and how is he supposed to tell his dad he missed the unplanned wedding and the ceremonial meeting of his fiancé. He was almost 30, but this was going to get him grounded for at least another 30 years or maybe even life.

Was he supposed to get his new wife a gift? Where they supposed to get matching tattoos like Turians? He could've sworn he read somewhere that humans consummated their vows the same way Turians do. Where did he go wrong dammit!?

He adores the idea of Shepard being his wife and loves knowing that she was so excited that she even told Vega about it. He just now has to figure out how he married her in the first place without her knowing he doesn't know. Because then she'll think he never wanted to marry her, and that is NOT the case. Maybe Tali will know? No way. She'd just call him a bosh'tet. Wrex will also call him a professional idiot. Liara won't judge, but he's sure she still hasn't gotten over her crush on the Commander, and he doesn't want to rub his new marriage in her face. Maybe Joker will tell him if he promises him the new fornax issue.

Garrus has had his fair share of giving his dad a pseudo aneurysm, but this one was going to send him into cardiac arrest for sure when he finds out his son married a woman the family didn't even meet. He needs a drink...after he finishes bribing Edi to scrub away everything she just heard him say out loud.

Garrus doesn't know that Vega is the galaxy's worst secret keeper, telling Shepard he's keeping the secret marriage a secret unwilling to let Shepard convince him that she's actually not married yet. She goes to see Garrus to have a good laugh about Vega's idiocy but walks into Garrus telling Edi he will use Shepard's override if she doesn't get rid of something.

Garrus is absolutely mortified and gives the cheesiest greeting to his "wife." She assumes Vega already brought the joke to Garrus but she's not overlooking him trying to be suspicious with Edi. He recovers, mentioning it was for his sesrch history for a gift he wanted to get her. He did intend to get her a gift so the phrase wasn't a complete lie...

She jokes about it and calls him her husband. Garrus, the realist he is, does not take this as a joke. She leaves him to his vices, and Garrus is now in a full-blown panic. He needs to understand what he did, and he needs to know now.

(If my brain gets any more random ideas, I'll at least finish and provide a resolution to this concept, lol. Feel free to offer your own ending)

[peachxmoons]

if i’m in that bar and you’re not…ill be looking down. you’ll never be alone.