#me when i get my hands on you motherfucker

[darnell-la]

What about Wade and Logan watching Vanessa and Reader pole dancing together and the boys getting all hot and bothered by watching?

note: overload — that’s all you guys need to know.

———

“Aren’t you excited!? Your long-time, short-time crush is going to dance in front of us tonight with my long-time and short-term fiancé,”

As soon as the two entered the bar, Wade couldn’t stop teasing Logan about the fact that this young lady he’s been crushing on for a while, will be dancing tonight.

“She just started yesterday, why would she already be on stage?” Logan sighed as he leaned back in his chair. “Maybe because she’s the hottest worker, right after my fiancé!?”

Logan glared at Wade, making him put his hands up in a surrendering passion.

“Look, don’t be grumpy all night. I wanna enjoy my butter pecan up there, alright? Good boy,” Wade patted Logan’s head before shouting out Vanessa's name to support her before she came up.

“That’s my girly pop!” Wade yelled out, making Vanessa chuckle as she danced on stage with y/n. Their session was almost done, and Logan felt drained. Watching y/n like this was going to be unforgettable tonight.

At first, he hated the idea of y/n being like this in front of so many men. That’s the reason why he came last second. Now he’s wishing he never did, with how hard and leaky he was from watching.

He couldn’t possibly go up to y/n without her knowing. She’d see the patch instantly. He cursed himself for being a perv.

“Hey, I’ll be right back,” Logan got up and quickly walked away before Wade could speak or anyone could see him cover himself up.

“Logan!? Wade sent me back here to come and get you! He said you’ve been all here for almost an hour,” y/n said as she made her way down the small hallway to the bathrooms.

After the show, it got dead, since people were only there to see the strippers of the night.

“Logan?” Y/n asked again, but he still didn’t hear her. He was too busy trying to focus on his release. “Logan, are you even here?” Y/n opened the men’s bathroom slowly, not really caring if she saw anyone else. She wanted to make sure Logan was alright if he was still here.

“Goddamnit,” y/n heard Logan grunt. She wanted to turn back around and leave, thinking he was having trouble using the bathroom until she saw one hand over the bathroom stall.

She squinted her eyes to take a better look, seeing how tight he was gripping the metal. The stall was bending in from how hard he gripped down.

“F-Fuck, just- Fuck, c’mon,” Logan groaned in annoyance, angry that he’s been going at this for what felt like days. He’s a mutant, so he should be able to last however long he pleased, but he wanted to release now. He’s never been this hard in his life.

“Logan?” Y/n said low, but surprisingly, he heard her this time. “Fuck-“ the man cut himself off and stopped instantly. “Y/n!?” The man panicked as he fixed himself up, but that was going to be hard.

He’s been leaking for who knows how long, and everything had made its way all over his hand. When he went to wipe his hand in his jeans, all it did was make him look worse.

“Yeah, I was just- I was just checking on. Wade told me to,” y/n said as she rubbed her fingers together, a bit embarrassed that she probably witnessed Logan, and an older adult jerking off in a bar bathroom.

“That motherfucker,” Logan mumbled as he began to buckle his pants. “I can, uh, leave if you’d like. I’m technically doing something illegal anyways,” y/n spoke about her being in the men’s bathroom. “No, no!- Just wait a second,”

Y/n stayed silent as she heard Logan groan in frustration and probably break a few things in the stall before he finally came out.

“Hey, Bub, uh, wassup?” Logan asked as he quickly walked over to the sink, not trying to make anything seem too obvious. “Just checking’ on ya,” y/n smiled as she scanned the man.

“Are you sure you’re okay, Logan?” Y/n felt the need to walk over to Logan, but slowly. “Yeah, Bub, just needed to take a leak, that’s all,” Logan lied as he turned around after drying his hands.

“Are you sure? You’re breathing a bit heavy, and-“ Y/n went on until she looked down at his lower body, seeing what his jeans looked like. They were basically drenched in one particular area.

Logan took a deep breath with his eyes closed, knowing he was caught and couldn’t lie his way out. He prayed she’d think he was just some man who needed to rub one out, but she kept asking him the right questions.

“First time watching the new modern women strip?” Y/n chuckled shyly as if wondering if this was even a joking situation. “You’re a funny one,” Logan chuckled as he fixed his shirt he noticed was sitting wrong.

“It’s nothing to be embarrassed. Most men don’t know how to act when they see a pair of tits,” y/n joked, but that slightly bruised Logan’s ego.

“Seen enough tits in my life, Bub,” Logan said, right before he took a look down at her chest. “Oh, you have? Seems like a fun life,” y/n got a bit defensive at his response. She couldn’t believe it at first, but her response was out of jealousy.

“Ain’t too bad — As long as they come with a pretty face,” Logan said as he looked into her eyes with a head tilt. “Yeah,” was all y/n could say as she broke eye contact.

“You know you’re pretty, right?” Logan asked as he moved towards y/n, softly letting his hand rest on her waist. “Really?” Y/n asked, confidence suddenly being thrown out of the window.

“Oh, yeah — So damn pretty,” Logan placed his free hand on her cheek, slightly rubbing it as her eyes widened. “T-Thank you,” y/n stuttered, and all Logan could do was chuckle at how she got around him.

“Got me all worked up out there, hun. Didn’t know you could move like that,” Logan admitted. “That’s why they had me dance on my first day,” Y/n said, reminding Logan about that. “That doesn’t sit right with me, Bub. Don’t want you back here workin’ for a creep,”

“But Vanessa? She works here,” y/n said, but he some care. “That ain’t my girl, so what she does, doesn’t concern me,” Logan said, not wanting to sound rude, but he truly did not care about anyone else, but y/n.

“You, though? You’re my girl, and you didn’t tell me about this job — Wade had to,” Logan said as the hand on her waist tightened. “And, that doesn’t sit right with me,”

Y/n felt the need to apologize, thinking she did something terribly wrong, even though she didn’t. Only in Logan’s eyes, she did do something that would need some consequences.

“Gonna say anything before I do what I’ve been needing for the past two hours?” Y/n wanted to speak, but she couldn’t. She was curious about how far Logan would take this.

“C’mere,” Logan said as he pulled y/n into a bigger bathroom stall than the one he was in. Once he locked the door, he pushed y/n to her knees, making sure to keep eye contact with her soft eyes.

“Gonna need you to look at me just like that until I’m done, okay? Been stuck for the past hour with this shit,” Logan said as he reached into his jeans to pull himself out. He didn’t think about it, but y/n sure did once she saw his length.

He was long, harder than she’d ever seen anyone before, thick, veiny, and leaking more than an average human should be.

“Open up, Bub,” was all Logan said as he pushed at her lips with his tip. Y/n hesitated but soon opened up and took him in. She had stopped after a few inches, but he continued thrusting his hips until she was in as much as he thought she could take.

“Fuck, baby — This is exactly what I needed,” Logan rolled his eyes as he felt instant release. He knew he was close, but he wanted to last. “Stop gaggin, baby — Wanna last a bit longer,” Logan told y/n, but she couldn’t. He was too huge.

“Bub, I said- Oh my god,” Logan grew angry, but soon whined as her throat collapsed around his shaft. “Fuck, I can’t hold it, Bub. So damn wet and warm- Fuck,” was all Logan said before his cock twitched.

Y/n couldn't help but look up at Logan to watch him lose himself in her mouth. The main she let out as he spilled into her mouth, made him groan louder, and tighten his grip on her hair.

“Goddamnit, I’m gonna cum again-“ Logan struggled to say as his legs shook, and a second orgasm ripped from him. Y/n’s eyes widen as more cum filled her mouth, so much that his seed leaked out of her mouth. There was too much to take.

“Nah uh, swollen it all, or I make you walk out with it on your face,”

[winpocalypse]

i might have been inspired to write some jealous!dean over sambrady because of @lambmotifz (hope its ok to tag you friend!) who opened my eyes to the concept here's a super rough sneak peak, hoping the full polished thing comes out this week pray for me

“Did Sammy not tell you anything about his time in college?”

“Don’t call him that.”

“Oh, but he loves it,” Brady says with a big cocky smile. “You know, he can hold on for hours. It’s kind of impressive. The second you call him Sammy, though, he comes untouched.”

That freezes Dean on the spot. His hand stops midway through the blade. His jaw tenses. And after a few seconds he slowly lifts his eyes up to the demon scum, his eyes hard against Brady’s playful ones. 

Dean’s voice is rougher than he ever heard himself when he barks, ��What?”

“I’m telling you, it’s like a trigger. Wonder why he likes it so much.��� The smile grows bigger.

Dean straightens up, his grip on the handle that much tighter. “You’re a liar.”

The scumbag laughs. Loud. “Let me tell you something about your baby brother.” Brady’s eyes shine bright, as Dean feels his vision go darker. “He likes it rough.” Dean’s breath stops altogether. “All that size of his and what he really likes is to beg for it.” Dean’s closer. He doesn't feel in control of his legs anymore. “He likes to—”

The next thing he knows, the knife is all the way deep in Brady’s thigh. The motherfucker yells out, but it's brief. The sound soon morphs out to a hysterical laugh. “Before I introduced him to that blonde bitch, I had him on his back and on his knees—”

The blade slides down to the knee, carving out flesh, sliding against bone, and the groan the demon lets out is almost the best thing Dean’s has ever heard.

“Shut the fuck up,” it comes as a snarl, from so deep within, Dean trembles with it. 

“He should’ve noticed,” Brady’s voice is high and he's talking a mile a minute. He wants Dean to hear this. Before this is over. “I mean, it was all good and sweet with Brady but when I took over? Guess he really liked the change, he couldn’t even think straight the first night I—”

Dean gets the blade out of the leg and into Brady’s mouth, knocking a few teeth out of the way, and opening the way to his neck. Brady’s wide eyes stare up at him, the wet grunts around the blade having Dean almost smile, but it’s not enough for it. The fucker could die a thousand deaths and it’s never going to be enough. “I said— shut the fuck up.”

[chrisslvtxx]

biggest fan.

summary: y/n goes to the versus tour and when chris lays his eyes on her, he cant take them off.

cw: cursing, FLUFF, suggestive, touching, pet names (baby, princess.)

authors note!: this is my first time writing something so please dont hate 😭😭😭

————————————————————————————————————————

“oh my god, they are literally right there!” y/n squeals, looking over at her best friend.

“bro, matt looks so hott.” y/f/n exclaims, staring at him in awe.

“so does chris, he look so scrumptious in that hat..” they both get stuck in a trance, staring at the two brothers.

they both get interrupted by security, telling them to move forward because they are next.

“okay, how do i look?” y/n giggles, shes wearing an orange lacy tank top with a short denim skirt.

“sexy as always, motherfucker!” y/f/n laughs, “what about me?” shes wearing the same thine but in blue.

“okay, girls your turn.” the female security guard smiles, letting them go through the barriers.

y/n runs up to chris, hugging him.

“oh my lord, your real! im your biggest fan!”

“hey, love. whats your name?” chris smirks, looking down past her face and his eyes trail down her body.

“im y/n!” she smiles, noticing his eyes wandering, a weird feeling exploding in her lower abdomen.

“y/n.. cute” he said, his voice low. he wraps his arm around her waist as they take the photo.

they both lean in for another hug before y/n and y/f/n walk off.

“i cannot believe what just happened!” y/f/n squealed, “i just fucking hugged matthew sturniolo!”

“hahah.. yeah..” y/n’s mind filled with thoughts of chris’ eyes wandering down her body.

her friend notices, and places a hand on her shoulder “whats up, y/n? you dont seem yourself..”

“chris.. h-he was checking me out?” she stifles a laugh, biting her lips fighting the urge to smile.

“your lying.” y/f/n mouth agape as you speak, not believing a single word.

————————————————————

after the show ends, one of their team members walks up to the two girls, telling them to go backstage.

“hello?” y/f/n speaks into an empty room, her voice echoing.

“y/n?” chris’ voice echoes back, as he walks through the back door.

“uh, chris.. hi!” y/n smiles, her dimples appearing on her soft skin.

“hey.. wassup” he smirks, walking up to her and her friend, “you must be y/f/n, matts out back if you wanna go see him.”

“i- uh yeah?” she quickly walks outside, leading her own way towards matt.

“fuck.. your so pretty..” chris mumbles under his breath, his hands trailing down to your waist.

“chris? wha-what are you doing?..” she breathes out, curious of what’s happening.

“you want me to stop? huh?” he smirks, knowing that hes driving her crazy.

“i- no..no..” y/n bites her bottom lip, stifling a giggle.

“you dont know how crazy you were driving me while i was up on stage.. this top, fuck, its doing things to me baby..” he chuckles lowly, his voice raspy.

“yeah? you like?” she becomes more confident with her words, her tone more stern.

“yeah princess, yeah i do..” he smirks, dropping his head to her neck, as one of his hands trail up towards her throat gripping it gently.

she whimpers softly at the feeling, he presses soft, gentle kisses along her collarbone.

“let me hear your pretty noises, baby..” he keeps pressing kisses to her body. “tell me what you want, baby, what do you want me to do?”

“i-i dont know..” she hums, stuck in a daze as his lips are against her.

he chuckles softly, “you dont know? you dont want me to touch you? you dont want me to kiss you? no?”

“i-chris, we cant.. you know we cant..” she replied, knowing she cant give in to him.

“you’re right, princess.. we can’t..” he agrees, his hands trailing down from her waist and throat and gripping her ass.

“im sorry..” she puts her head down, he grabs her chin, making her look up at him as he towers over her.

“don’t apologise, baby.. its fine” he presses a kiss to her forehead, before letting go of her body.

she smiles, but it falters a tiny bit as he retreats from her presence.

“i better get going, baby..” he smiles, before passing her his phone, a sign to give him her number.

she gladly takes it and types her name and number into his contacts, before handing it back to him.

“thank you baby.” he smirks, before leaving her alone in the basement of the venue.

shes left there, puzzled, for about 5 minutes before y/f/n walks in again.

“tell me everything.”

————————————————————

[madame-mongoose]

This model is so fucking cool I bet I could tear him apart with my bare hands. I bet it would be easy

[yellowistheraddest]

people on internet say use references when drawing, and im tired of being stubborn for no reason this is the end of yellow as you knew me

[cerealmonster15]

haikaveh... save me haikaveh...

i KNOW it's been talked about to death but. the haikaveh research project. it literally haunts my mind. i cannot get over the implications. alhaitham going through his school life as someone that most people dont even really know about because he keeps to himself and doesn't socialize, with kaveh being the one exception to that, finding his way into his life as his Best Friend, and then leading to alhaithams one and only time he participated in a research topic. his bio says he only ever did ONE joint project!!! one!!! the one with kaveh his best friend and i think also his only friend at the time!!!! and then it ended in not only the project falling apart but also alhaithams only friendship. kavehs best friendship. they were each others closest person. they had no family around - alhaithams parents having died when he was young and his grandmother dying before he joined the akademiya, and kaveh's dad dying when he was young and his mom having moved to fontaine. like even if you dont look at it through a romantic lens it's still undeniable how important they were [and are] to each other..........

i'm getting off track but my point is very specifically for alhaitham, the one time he got close to someone, made a friend, even agreed to join one(1) group project ever, it ended in disaster. it led him into a fight so bad that his one and only friend said he regretted that friendship!!!! it was so bad alhaitham left the project and he and kaveh didnt speak for ages until they just happened to run into each other again at the tavern!!!!! like obviously it has to be incredibly awful for both of them but i just think how this probably had alhaitham in the cynical mindset that friendships and collaborations like that might just never work out for him because the one time he let someone into his life, it blew up on him and he was all alone again. even though alhaitham never seems to care much if people dont like him, that clearly cant still apply to someone he was exceptionally close to. like if he didnt care he woudlnt have been the one to take his name off the project and mutually not speak to kaveh...... kavehs words are the ones that hit the most significantly to alhaitham.......... kaveh is said/implied to have had at least some other friends while at school / people knew who he was, but not so much alhaitham. people didnt know him and the ones that did just knew he didnt socialize/he was not easy to get along with. he only had kaveh and then, for a while, he lost him too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[frecklystars]

I fucking love Ryan Gosling in these Barbie interviews. Someone asked "hey what would Ken say in his bio on a dating app? what kind of person is he looking for?" and Ryan's like "uh... well before he even looks for a Type Of Person™, he's gotta be real up front that he's got no job... and no house... no real prospects of any sort, really, he just kinda sleeps on the beach, and -- you know what, he doesn't even have a phone? I... I don't know if he can even sign up for this app?" and Margot said "oh but he has abs. That should get him somewhere" and he said "no, no, I don't think he even has an email address, I don't think there's any way to contact him??"

and it's like three minutes of them talking about Ken not even having any pickup lines because his way of flirting isn't even flirting, it's him picking up something Barbie accidentally dropped (even though Barbie doesn't make mistakes) and saying "oh hey you dropped this 😳" and then offering it to Barbie and then when Barbie says thank you while making eye contact he's shaking and thinking "oh god what a perfect day Barbie looked at me" and then he'll ride that high the entire day. and the interviewer was like "but that isn't a pickup line" and Ryan said "no I don't... I don't think Ken does that, I think he just creates moments with Barbie and cherishes them" WHAT THE HELL SIR YOU'RE MAKING ME FALL FOR KEN EVEN MORE

[stabbyfoxandrew]

every time my dad does anything he has to do it in the most annoying and loudest way possible. and honestly i'm not sure if he means to or he's just really goddamn stupid but it's really really grating. and i'm suffering the werewolf curse rn so i'm ready to die

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

watching fandaniel go is wild because he is just [vestibular stims] [vestibular stims] [vestibular stims] [vestibular stims] and yeah man that's a mood

[bloodcoveredgf]

in my prophet era

[talentforlying]

one of these days i'm going to write up all that i've changed from azzarello's bullshit era and the one (1) piece i've kept from milligan (and also changed) and the only thing currently stopping me is that it is going to be so, so inside-baseball incomprehensible. and i almost never want to go reading/screencapping azzarello and milligan to add references but i Want to add references.

canon is goop, just know that we continue to ride the bus down "hellblazer ended at #250 and looks like swiss cheese before that" street.

[vanweezer]

being extroverted must be awesome imagine feeling nothing after telling someone "wow youre REALLY quiet". im going to talk less around you now 🫶

[butchdykekondraki]

anyway i think i could actually write an essay on everything fnaf did wrong vs everything dsaf did right but it would just boil down to "honestly fucking everything besides gameplay tbh". which is both really fucking sad and really fucking funny

[smol-tired-binch-blog]

hate how im now at a point where im legit like kicking my legs and grinning like an idiot over fictional characters SEND HELP

[derpu-doodles]

(pats the top of his head) this guy can fit So Much Sadness in him

whoops I popped off in the tags

[waywardsalt]

hopefully the last bitter post i make abt totk, but i had this realization abt it

(starting with the disclaimer that this is very much based on what I personally value in video games, on my feelings towards totk, this is subjective unless I start getting into objective things)

this was going to be a longer post but i am exhausted and i don't know how to really word this, but; totk feels like a world built almost exclusively on doylist explanations. it does not feel like a natural place, it does not feel like a time that takes place a few years after botw, it does not feel like a story that happens because events happened in this world; it feels like a video game location created for player entertainment, the whip-lash inducing shift from sheikah tech focus to zonai exists literally because the devs wanted to give the players shiny new toys while the old sheikah stuff doesn't take up any space, the story is clearly an afterthought compared to gameplay and an excuse to give the player more little things to play with, the worldbuilding has little thought put into it past new ways for the player to have fun and do new things, any and all references to past games (even to fucking botw) are very shallow callbacks that either make no sense in context or are just stupid little winks to those who aren't new to the game, while much of the extremely awkward inconsistencies with botw are there because they wanted to cater to new people.

this story doesn't build on botw's story, it rolls back and stampedes over some ideas from that game, it's a squeal for the sake of giving people these characters and this world again with some tweaks and fliers, the musical references to divine beasts and champions mean absolutely nothing in context and are only there as hollow references in lieu of using any new and relevant leitmotifs, characters that are flat on the surface and downright confusing and nonsensical and marinated in old stale tropes if you look any deeper, the villain being ganondorf specifically does not matter in context because nothing unique to ganondorf the character is ever explicitly important and he was just put in because he's the popular zelda villain, the references are hollow and carry no meaning in the greater scheme of things, the story itself ends by returning to the way everything was when the game started because oh we can't have our precious well-known ip important characters be permanently disabled or forever altered in a meaningful way.

it's so painfully... all there because it's a fictional work created for an audience seeking fun. it's so obviously like that because it was created with the goal of fixing things from a previous title and adding new things without any regard for narrative cohesion or good worldbuilding.

as someone who enjoys games with stories best when really taking into consideration and delving into the depths of that story, totk just unravels in front of my eyes when i try to do that, and it just feels insulting at how obviously ultrahand exists literally so the player can pull off dumbass g-mod dogshit while any story explanation for why that power exists at all is either flimsy as hell or straight-up not there.