#me when colin and pen get married | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

wroteclassicaly · 1 year ago

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18+

Warnings: Smut, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, slight fluff, dominant Penelope, threesome, some comfort, plus sized reader, self-esteem issues, slight anxiety, and NSFW.

Pairings: Colin Bridgerton x Penelope Featherington x Female Reader

Wordcount: 1,926

A/N: Hi! This is my first piece of fic (trash) into the Bridgerton world. I’ve never read any fics, haven’t seen all of the show yet. I’ve only recently gotten into it because of Penelope/Polin. Hope you enjoy, and I look forward to producing more content (likely turning this into a storyline)!

Your hands feel cold, slick with an icy sweat that seems to evaporate into heat. The more you seem to fold into yourself, she can recognize and wrap her fingers in your own. It is a comfort, however, also a reminder, as your fingertips would brush across the diamond she bears. He is not meant for you, she is not meant for you. They belong to one another.

You have to remember why you were brought to their home in the first place. And ultimately, what you do to earn your way in this life. That would surely shame their family name if anyone were to see you here, sneaking through corridors in the middle of the night with the newly married Penelope Featherington — now proudly assuming her Bridgerton name. Your thoughts are shaken from you, as you round the corner, stopping short at the buttery glow of light spilling from beneath the doors. You edge away slightly, spare hand reaching to clutch your sleep attire closed.

“You know that we will not object if your mind has changed.” She speaks with a soft reassurance, the nail on her thumb scratching along your palm.

That is the most odd thing — an emotion, in which you cannot process yet. A connection you’ve already established with them. It prevents you from shying away, from objecting. You’re shaking your head, inhaling rather sharply. “I do not have very many reservations, Mrs. Bridgerton —“

“ — Penelope, please?”

You can do nothing but smile in return. “Penelope. Forgive me, I suppose my curiosity has taken a walk with my nerves tonight. But I will not let it get the better of me. I still want this. To give what I can, to you and to your husband.”

She stops short of those doors and takes both of your hands into her own. She’s a picture of this fine, smooth porcelain, so full and perfect that you could spend hours worshipping if given the chance. Maybe that night is tonight?

Her voice is roping you back in. “This is a mutual thing that Colin and myself have agreed upon. It is not just about us. This consent you’ve given, it does not extend only to our pleasure, but also to your own.”

You’re inhaling sharply, understanding her implications, but unsure why. Your role is to give them whatever they need and then go. And this is what they’d like? It’s as if time stops when Penelope wraps her dainty fingers around the door handle, pushing, the force bringing your dressing gowns a few inches off of the floor by their hems. If you thought that was something, the sight that you’re greeted with is enough to wake your entire bloodline from beneath the soil.

Candles are draped around the room for more than just the ability to see, giving it all a personal ambience. This is their personal bedroom, not a study, not a hidden place, but where their marriage bed is located. Your mouth becomes parched as you look around to truly take it in, the doors closing behind you not even startling you. Penelope stays close by, especially until you’re noticing him. He’s patient, a slight smile pressed into his beautiful mouth.

“Good evening, ladies. I take it we’re alright then?”

It’s that honey-hot depth that captivates you, causing you to reach back to Pen, seeking her support. She encourages you to meet her husband in a few short feet. He’s clad in his cream colored night shirt, his silhouette shrouded in candlelight. His hair has grown out a little, a slight touch of curl sweeping across the top. Their radiating body heats caging you in, it’s a feeling you are sure won’t ever occur again in your lifetime.

“Mr. Bridgerton. Good evening, Sir.”

He grins as though a feather has tickled the crafted end of his jawline. Penelope shares a fond look over your shoulder.

“No need for formalities. It’s safe in here, I promise you.” Penelope is nodding as his arm raises, one eyebrow to gauge your permission. You don’t object. And his rather large hand is caressing your cheek, stifling the air inside of your lungs. “Call me Colin, yes?”

Like the sweetest of sugar, his name rolls off your tongue without pause. “Colin.”

Penelope’s hands find your shoulders from behind, sliding around your collar to dip in, caress your skin. You swallow, but accept. “Whatever you wish to do, you have my permission.” Your head briefly attempts to look over your shoulder as you also address her. “The both of you.”

~*~

It hadn’t taken long for things to progress between the three of you. When Colin’s mouth found your own, Penelope had slowly unraveled your gown from your torso, everyone holding their breaths as it hit the floor. Your chin became pinched beneath his sturdy fingers, tilting until he had access to your neck. Pen’s hands aimlessly wandering with what you thought wasn’t a purpose, just an exploration. How wrong you’d been the moment that her hands had found your full breasts, ever-so-gently caressing your areola.

It wasn’t that she was experienced in her movements, no. It was how eager she seemed to touch you, to have your body beneath her grasp like this. And it only added energy on top of the mounting tension already in the room. You did not have to guide, nor teach. Colin maneuvered, gave his wife space to learn, to feel another woman’s body.

He’d coaxed her around, taking her previous placing behind you, her pupils had encased her irises into an inky black velvet. The way her mouth had become swollen from biting her full, lower lip, her hands unable to stop touching you. In the end, you closed the gap, Colin caressing the nape of your neck as you kissed his wife with fervor. It was beautiful, the two of you. Your shape wore a little more weight than Penelope’s, but it was exceptional, in his eyes — seeing women that could not see the beauty in themselves, lost in one another this way.

He could only hope that you’re both seeing it now, as well.

As you’d broken apart, Colin stepped to the side, voice a bitten rasp, offering both hands. “Shall we take this to bed?”

~*~

You aren’t able to breathe correctly, breasts heaving, legs wide open to make room for him, for her.

The second that they had laid you down, that he had undressed his wife and kissed her, he whispered something in her ear. She’d gone red, but nodded and joined your right side. You tried not to let languid anxieties find their way inside, tried to remain proper when he had stood before you, bedside — all hard muscle, trim hips that held his length in between. He would be a fit, even for you.

He’d licked his tongue at the corner of his mouth, inhaling rather sharply, his hair covered chest already drenched in desperate perspiration. “I am going to show Pen how to touch you between your thighs. Will you let me — us, will you let us?”

How her hand looked in his as he guided, separating two fingers and sucking them into his mouth, causing a not so proper word to leave your lips — it’s surely a sight that could cure those without clear sight. The way their lips had parted when her finger breached your opening, sliding into your wet heat, knowing how it felt for the first time. She’d moved to his ministrations along your jugular, everyone entangled in a pulling, a pushing, more. Heavens, more. You had felt the tears glisten in your eyes, melt into your lashline, cooling on the air.

Colin had asked if you were alright, to which you drug him by his wrist, cupping his palm over your breast. “Please, please.”

~*~

The way the ceiling looks above you, you cannot see through your hazed over vision. The candles burning, melting down, you are not concerned with. Even the summer’s rain that has begun to pour on earth, there is no room to ponder. What you’re thinking of within this moment, it is the man between your legs, one hand held behind your crown, the other holding onto your waist as he moves so deeply inside of you, precise, wonderfully intricate thrusts, that discover a place in your body that you weren’t aware existed. Why should you? No client had ever taken this much time, nor care for what your body felt.

It was never about that. You were there to serve, purpose fulfilled, you left tattered and empty. But with Colin and Penelope Bridgerton? You aren’t sure what this is. The singular certainty that you do have, however, is that you do not wish for this to end.

There’s a fire in Penelope’s eyes as she sees you holding back a brewing question, your hands shaking. The one wound around Colin’s shoulder, the other that you have currently working between her legs. She can barely hold it together, beautiful and angelic to you, keeping you able to take her husband without issue. She is nodding at you, knowing what you need. You’re past that point, coasting over realms undiscovered, heavenly worlds that only Colin Bridgerton has directions to, powers to unlock.

She removes her hands from you both, dipping them down to his bottom, feeling, grabbing, and that moan drips from her like the cream that’s accumulated across her thighs, and she pushes, locks in tight. Like he’s under command, under her spell, his hips take you faster, harder — giving you exactly what you could not ask for. You’re not sure who is louder at this point, but everyone begins to breathe harder, lungs exerted, hands finding one another. You clip onto his neck’s nape, your other hand finding Penelope’s soft, soaked mound, and he is gripping onto her breast, his spare reaching back to hold onto your hand that is on his neck.

Penelope reaches her peak first, how she tightens around your fingers, collapsing right into the pillow beside your head. It triggers you to follow, body briefly arching, throat unable to let out anything that is not a pitiful, intense cry. You’re swimming with this, ignited in a reality that you cannot imagine not having endured before. Colin tenses, his forehead finding your own, and Penelope is lifting to watch you to complete your peaks. He sighs himself into a drawn out whine, right into your open mouth.

And then it’s over, his full weight pressed into you. It’s like there’s instruments that have suddenly stalled and cast a curtain aside to let you hear every sound you’ve been ignoring, incapable of. Heavy rain, battering winds, and rushing heartbeats. You all take a thoughtful moment, before Colin is lifting on forearms. “You’re alright? The both of you?”

You concur with Penelope. Colin smirks, bringing your slick covered fingers, letting them work into his mouth. He sucks her essence free of you, and they lean to trade a kiss, before taking a place on either side of you. Pen reaches for the blankets, pulling them up and gently tucking you in.

“I believe I will ask Mr. Bridgerton to extend the invitation.”

You turn to Colin, a question written into your features. He doesn’t give you too much time to ponder. “You will stay with us? Tonight?”

It’s everything that you want, but also everything that you cannot ask for. Like a fool, you’re already falling lovesick.

What have you done?

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shinysobi · 1 year ago

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"it was awkward to see colin flirt and behave like a rake" "he gave me the ick" yes ! that is the fucking point!! congratulations! you have the media literacy skills of a fucking monkey because my 4-year old niece could understand it better than you do.

we are supposed to find colin cringey and annoying and get the ick because that is not who he is. he is not anthony, or simon, or even benedict. colin (apart from gregory) is the sweetest of all bridgerton brothers (i'm going by book canon) and his most identifiable character trait is the fact that he values an emotional connection above everything. he runs away to the continent because he wants to feel that emotional connection. he has meaningless sex in brothels because that is the example he has seen growing up, that is the norm. he tries so hard to fit into the norm. he goes out drinking, adopts an entirely new personality, learns flirtations because that is how he thinks he will fit in. he's got armour on, as violet said. he puts everyone's needs above his own, he stops rambling on and boring his family with details of his trip because he knows no one cares. he doesn't talk to anthony or benedict about his heartaches because he knows they still, somewhere in their heart of hearts, view him as the annoying younger brother. he's so devastated by his closest friend not responding to him that he adopts a new personality in the hopes that it might mask the hurt better. he runs after penelope in episode one because he is so attuned to her emotions that he knows she's hurting, and tries to comfort her even when she's spiraling and lashes out. he must have been hurt by her words in the "good night mr bridgerton" scene but he puts it aside to genuinely apologise to her when literally no one else in that family would do that. colin, instead of brooding over his own feelings, goes and corners penelope in her family's garden and apologises to her, disregarding his own hurt at being cruelly dismissed by his close friend.

penelope asking colin to kiss her is not a mark of how "pathetic" she is. she has written and shamed herself in a manner that is almost entirely unsalvageable. she is at her lowest point, and then portia comes in and reminds her of how undesirable she is, and she sinks even lower. she asks colin to kiss her because she sees it as a final act, after which she can quietly wave goodbye to her dreams of ever getting married and leaving her mother's home. colin kisses her because he is also keenly aware of how she's feeling. he knows how hurt she is, he wants to do anything to alleviate that. be it cracking a joke, or kissing her. he is gentle, because he wants it to be something she can dream of when she's by herself. penelope, at this moment, has no hope for herself, and their kiss is an act of letting go for her. no, it's not a pity kiss, no he did not like her after her glow up, he has always loved her. him being struck dumb is a reaction to her physical transformation, nothing more. he does not flirt with her in that ballroom scene, he only approaches her when she's in distress. he's not flirting with her. i can assure you penelope could wear the frumpiest most neon yellow gown of all time and colin would still go "<333 my pen" for her.

colin jumps to catch the balloon's ropes because he sees that penelope is in danger, he does not give a shit about anyone else lmao. he feels temporary relief when he sees eloise run to safety, but the moment he sees penelope in immediate danger, he rushes to take action. afterwards, when he sees that she's being comforted by debling (all my homies hate debling, even if he is aro/ace coded i do NOT claim him) he does not approach her. it would be easy for him to do so, but he does not, because he respects her boundaries. colin bridgerton is the only man in the ton who respects women (the featherington sons-in-laws are too pretty to have a thought) he calls out fife and his friends for treating women like objects and calls them cavalier. the only way he would have been more explicit about his demisexuality was if he tap danced on the club table (entertaining thought, luke newton please)

colin also rapidly takes action, something which no one in the show has done so far. simon would have died instead of accepting his feelings for daphne, daphne would have been content with a loveless marriage forever instead of asking for help. kate would have pushed edwina down the aisle and gone off to india instead of confronting her own feelings, and anthony would have married edwina if she hadn't been brave enough for the three of them to run from the altar and ruin herself. penelope stood on the sidelines for years and loved him quietly because she had no hope of him loving her back. colin, the moment he is assured of his feelings, runs to penelope, almost kisses her in the middle of a ballroom. when he hears that debling is about to propose, he goes to the ball, just to dissuade penelope one more time. he cuts into their dance because he's desperate. when he runs after her carriage, he asks her if she has been proposed to, because he would not have touched her otherwise. he confesses his feelings to her only when he knows that she hasn't gotten engaged to debling, and when she says "but we are friends" he moves away. nothing more. he would have let her go, if she did not return his feelings.

idk whether i should be flattered or offended at people misunderstanding this season because on one hand it is offensive, but on the other hand, it means only smart people get polin. seriously. your minds have been rotted by insta-love and enemies to lovers that you can't even appreciate the innate beauty of friends to lovers. being friends with someone and then holding all those feelings for them. the trepidation of possible rejection. the fulfillment of being loved by the person who knows you the best of them all. the privilege of loving someone whose feelings you know better than your own. love is gentle and kind and yes it is a violent, uprooting force but above all, love does not hurt anyone. it does not hurt you. i could love someone quietly for years and it wouldn't bother me if their feelings were requited or not because my feelings are none of their business and i consider it a privilege to love and be loved by them, even if it is not in the way i would want it to be. polin are privileged in the highest sense. they know each other better than anyone else, they know how to love each other better than anyone else. to think they are rushed or they dont deserve each other is a disservice to both of them. they would be miserable with anyone else.

in other matters, if i see one more person talking smack about luke or nicola behind the safety of their screens i will personally get a bazooka.

#bridgerton #polin #bridgerton season 3 #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #colin x penelope #colin my beautiful boy i will avenge you from these dumb people #penelope my sweet girl you are a dumbass but i am rooting for you and the love of your life #also anyone else see that complex female characters on this show are much better written when there's a woman running it?#hmmmm jess brownell you have my respect...for now #long rant but uhhh i am writing a fanfic where i erase the mistakes of cvd (the ghastly man)#the only good thing you did was the casting and i doubt you had a hand in it at ALL #luke newton and nicola coughlan the ACTORS that you are

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love-byers · 1 year ago

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i am afraid no one gets him like i do. yes he's a whore slut rake boy but he's also not

colin may need to occasionally go to horny jail but what he really yearns for is love and connection. he has always yearned for it. sex is good but sex on its own is not fulfilling to him. marina broke his heart, he truly wanted to care for her and love her and be loved. even before he fell for penelope he wrote about his sexual encounters so beautifully unlike any man of that era ever would. after a while he lost interest in it because it lacked something, love and genuine connection. he's a romantic people!!! he's a hopeless romantic trying to be a flirtatious bachelor, and it's a facade he can't keep up! he's a writer, a dreamer, he wants something pure and true. at the gentleman's club he says something i find so beautiful and pure, he questions why men must act nonchalant about their sex life when it is one of the only things in life with true meaning. and he gets LAUGHED AT!!! the part of the carriage scene where pen strokes his face and hair and he completely melts into her touch is, don't get me wrong, HOT!!!!! but it was even sweeter to me because it's not just that he is so horny for penelope he can't stand it anymore, but he is getting what he's yearned for. the connection, the touch that means something. the touch that carries love with it. this is also why the dream and kiss with pen got him so down bad. he unexpectedly felt something he had been yearning and searching for maybe without realizing it, love and connection! and once pen accepts his confession, he is head over heels in love obsessed and ready to marry her.

what lady whistledown wrote about him not being his true self really embodies his arc this season. colin in earlier seasons was acknowledged as having never been to a brothel and not being this all knowing sex god he pretends to be in 3. who colin truly is is someone who wants his sexual encounters to mean something, who sees sex as a moment of connection between two people rather than just pleasure. for that time, that was pretty beautiful.

and also the fact that when he's with the sex workers they are the ones all over him pleasing him, but with penelope he is pleasing her. he yearns for love, to feel and give love, not just to receive it.

COLIN BRIDGERTON GET BEHIND ME I WILL PROTECT YOU

(this is directed at people mostly on tiktok who watched the show with their eyes closed complaining about how they wanted colin to be a virgin and hate that they made him sexually experienced & a man whore KEEP MY SONS NAME OUT YO MOTHAFUCKING MOUTH)

#bridgerton #bridgerton season 3 #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #polin

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grace-williams-xo · 1 year ago

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I HAVE FINISHED THE FIRST FOUR THIS IS GONNA BE MY MESSY THOUGHTS POST. SPOILERS AHEAD. [Part two rambles, addressing some of these.]

I want Cressida to be happy and I want her and Debling to work things out sue me I do

More than that I ship Cressida and Eloise,,,, frothing for them to kiss actually

Benedict my happy smiling boy with no thoughts behind the eyes I love you

I still want Sophie to appear late in the season

Anthony is so in love and obsessed with Kate it is grotesque like that man has not had a thought about anything other than his wife since he married her

Despite being the world’s biggest Kanthony lover,,,, I have to admit that their absence works better than I expected

Francesca and Eloise’s little friendship moment in ep 1 was so sweet [EDIT: I meant Francesca and Penelope smh my brain]

Francesca has my entire heart I want her to continue to thrive happy in part two

It’s not that I don’t like the Mondrich’s or their plot… it just feels very disconnected. Hopefully this improves

SO happy about Pen and Delacroix’s continuing friendship I always want more of that I love them

Anthony is gonna kill Colin when he gets back, Kate saying no is gonna be the only reason he doesn’t (I can’t fully explain it, I just feel like Anthony is gonna be mad)

Despite what I said in point 6, we do need kanthony in every episode of part two

Kinda loving Portia Featherington this season, sending her thoughts and prayers every time Prudence and Phillipa breathe, but also scared how she’s gonna react to Pen marrying Colin

When Colin finds out about LW,,,,,,

I like how late the introduction of Marcus was, and how slow burn that is

The first threesome scene wasn’t that bad imo and the second one, where he’s not involved, is so blink and you miss it and he’s clearly not into it anyway so also not that bad

This is going to be the longest 27 days of my life

P.S. I don’t know what to say about Polin. I was screaming at Colin for 90% of it. The carriage scene, the proposal; chef’s kiss.

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dollypopup · 1 year ago

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I guess what I find most funny about the 'She should call off the wedding because of Colin's entrapement line!' crowd is like. . .y'all really don't get Penelope at all, do you?

She has loved this man for YEARS. She's loved him through his engagement to someone else, she's loved him through him saying he wouldn't court her, she's loved him through multiple countries, through her family mocking their closeness, through a potential marriage to a Lord. She loved him so much she couldn't even DENY having feelings for him to save what she thought was her only chance of getting married. Do you know how easy it would have been for her to go 'No, we're just friends, I don't like him like that, you're proposing to me and that's what matters'? She couldn't denounce her feelings for him even THEN. Even when she doesn't think he reciprocates them and she's made peace with a life with Debling and is expecting his proposal. Colin was *always* first in her heart, through all those hurdles.

Because Colin has been kind in a cruel world, and he's made her laugh, and he encourages her confidence and he's warm and he's gorgeous and he centers her and he values her and he listens and makes her feel desired and beautiful. He's a good man, and her love for him makes her feel good, she treasures it. Even in the books she says it feels good to love a good person, whether he loved her back or not. And now she knows that he does and you think one line that Colin says in obvious hurt after finding out she's been hiding a secret persona for him is enough to shake that love? She spent what? Half a decade looking out her window pining for him and now on the eve of getting to live a life with him as husband and wife, she's going to chuck that away because of one sentence? How lowly do you think of her? How *stupid* do you think she is? To throw away the love of her life over what? Her pride? This fandom's OOC Fanon Pen is a disservice to Penelope's actual character.

Her love for Colin is steadfast. It's made of tougher stuff than all that. It has survived everything that has been thrown at it. Distance, other people, Portia. And y'all really, truly believe that a singular statement will make her go 'Naw, I don't want it anymore!' PUHLEASE. Even when she offers him that annulment, you KNOW she knows it's not on the table.

Stop playing. OF COURSE she didn't call off the wedding. Of COURSE she chose to understand where he was coming from and went 'I didn't mean to trap you, Colin, I love you'. Of course she asks what the marriage will be and is comforted by the fact that he still wants to go through with it.

Penelope Featherington has loved Colin most of her life. It has been one of the few constants in her existence. He has been good to her in said existence, consistently. He's listened, he's cared, he's apologized to her, he's taken ownership of his actions, he's invited her to be more open, he's joked with her, he's supported her, he saw her when she was invisible. She. Loves. Him. And for good reason.

It's not going away because of one line. Or two. Or three. Come back next time when you actually understand her.

#polin #penelope bridgerton #colin bridgerton #bridgerton #some of y'all are tripping forreal #'oh we love romance!' and then she leaves him because of one line? nawwwwwwwwww straight to jail do not pass go do not collect $200 #y'all are out here living in a 'imma ghost them the second i feel like it' world but like that's just not how real relationships work #they have history and tenderness and love for each other and she's not about to quit on all that because of one setback #just like HE'S not about to quit on it all because of a setback #some peeps acting like he slapped her clean across the face and dunked her naked into a river to hold her down beneath the water #he said one thing when he was upset? like maybe ease up a little bit and try some empathy and character analysis #instead of going RIGHT to revenge and indulging your inner mean girl

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xoladybella · 5 months ago

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Objective?

I need to talk about what’s on my mind regarding blonde Pen🫣

Let’s talk about why its shock factor is so prevalent. The obvious being she’s blonde. No one predicted this happening. I know we all collectively did a double take when this popped up! I scrolled back to make sure I was seeing it right. So, keeping it surface level, it’s just Pen’s costume for the masquerade ball.

On a deeper level (aka my thoughts since seeing it) it’s so real. It’s almost too real to even process. When you think about it, there will more than likely be a scene of her and Colin being intimate in some capacity while she’s blonde. Either it being a kiss/make out or something more👀 Now, my thing is, if Nic and Luke actually aren’t a thing and Lukola isn’t something they want to keep happening, do you think they’d let this happen? Like going to the writers and Shonda and saying “hey this is too much/too real” I mean this is really pushing the blurred lines. Lines that were already pretty blurry from season 3. Even if they don’t have an intimacy scene with this look, it’s still playing into the idea of them being something more than “just friends”.

If I’m going to go deeper and play with an idea that popped in my head, what if this is their way of hard launching in a fun way? I wouldn’t put it past Nic to be the one to come up with this. She’s very creative. They get to take off Penelope’s wig (which, let’s be honest, is the only thing separating it being fictional to it feeling real) and be a happy (married) couple while she’s blonde. Even if it’s just for a scene. It’s still going to feel so real. I don’t think we realize how unprepared we are for this 🫣

Shonda… I see what you’re doing 👀 you can’t convince me she isn’t the biggest Lukola shipper. She just hides behind Polin being her favorite. Have you ever wondered why?🤭😉

#lukola #nicola coughlan #luke newton #polin bridgerton #my thoughts

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inej-ruination-ghafa · 1 year ago

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maroon - l.h

midnights masterlist | lavender haze | anti-hero

summary: the three times you said no to his marriage proposal and the one time you didn't

warnings: alcohol

wordcount: 2.4k

You were in your second year at college. Yale had been your dream school for as long as you could remember and the first year had been a dream and now you had the second year to get ready for.

You were at a party when you stumbled into some guy and he spilled a glass of alcohol all over your shirt.

You looked at him in shock, staring down at the way that the red of the alcohol had splashed all over your little white dress.

There was a moment of silence as you both looked at one another. The stain was splashed all over your abdomen and he felt awful for it.

Some other boy walked over, gasping at the mess that had been made as he stood next to the blonde boy.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he said, grabbing a stack of tissues and placing the red wine down.

You scoffed. You recognised Logan Huntzberger instantly and you could not believe that this had just happened to you.

“Wow Logan, that’s a mess,” his friend said, “Not you sweetheart, you’re gorgeous,” he teased and you just shook your head.

You tried to dab at the stain with the tissues he had handed you but it wasn't working so you abandoned the idea, instead looking at him annoyed.

”How can I make it up to you?” He asked and his friend leaned on his shoulder, looking at the mess.

“You can buy me a new dress,” you said, trying to ignore the maroon stain that was growing against your stomach, the fabric sticking to your stomach.

His friend that leaned against his shoulder smiled, “He could offer his hand in marriage, that normally does it for me,” he joked.

“Ignore Colin,” Logan said with a smile before he looked at you, “Do you wanna marry me?”

You could feel your face heating up at the proposition but you had to hide your embarrassment and act as nonchalant as possible.

“No way Huntzberger,” you said before looking at his friend, “Does that actually work for you?”

he shrugged, “Ask the missus,”

“He’s kidding,” Logan said with a smile, “Send me the dress,” he pulled out a pen before grabbing your hand and writing his address onto the back of your hand, “And then I'll try to clean it, if not, I'll buy you a new one,”

“Thank you,” you said before walking to the door.

Colin looked at his friend and he realised that he had never seen that look on his face before. His friend had just fallen head over heels with some mystery girl.

“You’re gonna marry her mate,” he said.

Logan turned to him, eyes slightly wide, “you’re crazy,” he said, turning back to watch you leave because it hid the blush on his cheeks.

You turned back as you opened the door and he realised just how red your white dress had been stained. You waved at him, shooting him a smile and he waved back a little too enthusiastically.

Little did you know that tonight was going to be the start of a crazy relationship for you.

You could feel your knee shaking up and down, your hand pressing against your thigh to get it to stop. You were so worried about Logan that you couldn't even function right.

He had been on the trip with Colin and Finn when their stunt had gone wrong and now you were sitting here in a hospital waiting room, hoping that he would be okay but there was no news.

“Mrs Huntzberger?” A voice called out.

You turned around at the sound of your boyfriend's last name and then your brain computed to what they had just said. You looked around and realised nobody knew any difference so you just walked up to the woman, accepting the responsibility, “Oh, um, yes?”

The nurse gave her a smile before she gestured to the room, “You can go in now,” she said.

You nodded and took a deep breath before opening the door. You gasped when you saw it, hand going to your mouth to quiet yourself.

He looked so broken, blood drying slightly on his hairline and he was hooked up to all of these monitors. It broke your heart to see him like this and you sat down next to his bed, unable to take your eyes off of him.

They said he would wake up soon but you didnt mind sitting with him as he slept. With shaky hands, you reached over and brushed a strand of hair out of his face, smiling at the way his head instinctively moved towards you.

You didn't know how long you had been sitting there and staring at him, just making sure that he was really there and alive and wasn't a dream before he started to stir.

His eyes fluttered open and you were met with his gorgeous eyes. You let out a sigh of relief and his lips started to curl into a smile as he looked at you.

“Morning,” he muttered and you chuckled at the words, heart pounding in his chest.

“How do you feel?” You asked, reaching for his hand.

He shrugged his shoulders as much as he could, “The way most people feel when they fall off a cliff,” he teased and you shook your head.

This was not a laughing matter to you. You had nearly lost the love of your life all because he was an idiot and wanted to go out on some dumb adventure and you were so mad at him.

You had been mad ever since you had left your apartment, furious as you drove into New York and absolutely seething as they told you that he had a collapsed lung and listed off all of his other ailments.

But now, as you looked at him, you were just grateful that you got to be mad at him. Grateful that he would stay alive long enough for you to tell him how mad you are. But not now.

”I’m glad you’re alive,” you said and he nodded.

“Me too,” he smiled at you, lips pulling into a smirk, “I’m glad I get to look at your beautiful face again,” he tilted his head to the side, “I thought you’d be more angry,”

You scoffed, “I’m furious,” you said with a small laugh before shaking your head, “No time for that now though, lets just make sure you’re better,”

He nodded, lifting his hand up slowly and touching his cheek. You laughed to yourself before leaning down and pressing a kiss to his cheek.

The nurse walked in and looked at the two of you, a smile on her face.

“Mrs Huntzberger?” She asked.

Logan looked up at the nurse with wide eyes. He had not expected her to say that to you and before he could question it, he watched you stand up.

“Yes,” you replied with little hesitation, forgetting that he was in the room and that you weren’t actually married.

The nurse looked between the couple for a second, “We need to take some tests, see you in a second,”

“One second, I just need to tell my wife something,” Logan said, giving you a teasing smile. Although he was joking, he couldn't deny that the words seemed so normal as they fell off his tongue, like he was meant to say them.

The nurse nodded her head before walking out of the room and Logan looked up at you.

“Are we getting married, Mrs Huntzberger?” He questioned that signature smirk painting his lips.

You could feel your face warming up at embarrassment that he had found out what had happened. You had never meant for him to find out the ways that you had gotten into the room.

“It's the only way they'd let me in,” you tried to explain, embarrassment seeping out of your pores.

Logan did not seem fazed at the idea, his hand reaching out to grab yours, “You want to get married to me?”

“Not today,” you leaned down, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips, “One day,” you stood up and walked towards the door, stopping and turning back to him with your hand on the handle, “one day,”

you repeated the sentiment under your breath before walking out. He was left in that room, cheeks hurting from how much he was smiling at the idea of one day making you his wife.

You two were sitting on the hardwood floor, looking at one another. He was leaving for London soon and you made work of your last few days together by drinking that cheap rose that Colin had bought you a while ago.

You were both totally drunk, asking yourself how you had ended up in this position, your feet in his lap, your head tucked into his shoulder as he sucked a mark into your neck.

“Marry me,” he whispered against the skin on your neck, thumb brushing against the bruise that would blossom there soon.

You felt giddy but the words nearly made you sober up. Marriage was a big commitment and after what had happened with your parents, you didn't know if it was ever a good idea.

You leaned into him, hand on his chest as you looked up, getting lost in his eyes for a second before you remembered what you were going to say, “No,”

“I love you, I'm gonna marry you one day,” he repeated the sentiment again and you smiled to yourself.

Although you had been together for nearly two and a half years and had gone through hundreds of ordeals together, the thought of marriage still scared you.

But as you looked into his eyes, both of you a little tipsy as you cuddled on the floor of his apartment, the smell of incense burning throughout your apartment, you knew that maybe it wouldn't be too bad of an idea.

“Okay,” you muttered, not believing it to be real.

“I'm serious. I'm gonna marry you,” he held your face in his hands, not taking his eyes off of you, “I will be your husband,”

You scoffed, still not believing him, “Maybe,”

“Thanks Mrs Huntzberger,” he teased and you stood up, brushing the dust off of yourself before reaching your hand out.

He took your hand, flashing you his signature toothy grin. You could feel your cheeks heating up at the thought of walking down the aisle towards him, that smile looking back at you.

“Let's get you to bed,” you muttered, pulling him up clumsily and he collapsed into your arms and suddenly, the idea of marriage didn't seem too bad.

Two days until graduation. The time was supposed to be relaxing but as you stood in the park where you had gone on your first date with Logan, it was anything but that.

“Excuse me?” You questioned, taking a step back as you looked at him there on one knee in front of you, the box open to reveal a gorgeous ring.

“Marry me?” He asked, not repeating his speech again.

You could feel your heart speeding up and that fear of marriage bubbled back up again and you had to take a few steps back to try and escape that feeling, he noticed that was something wrong and instantly closed the box, shoving it into his jacket pocket before rushing over to you, hands coming to your shoulders to try and smooth you.

“Are you okay?” He asked, not even asking why you were freaking out.

You shook your head, “I need some time,” you managed to stutter out and he nodded his head.

You hated how patient he was with you. It would be easier for Logan to yell at you then for you to have to see that disappointed stare.

Before you even realised what you were doing, you were running in the opposite direction and you didn't stop until you could feel your lungs begging for air.

That was two days ago.

Now you were standing alone at your graduation. You hadnt talked since that day and you didnt know what you were going to do when you saw him but now he was standing there in front of you so you had very few choices.

You gave him a half hearted smile and walked over. He was holding a bouquet of roses in his hands and you didn't know what to say.

“Yours was better than my graduation, I was slightly tipsy an-” he started to say but you could not deal with the small talk.

“Stop,” you said.

He went silent instantly and you could see that similar look of disappointment in his eyes.

Logan reached his hand out, taking yours in his and holding it tight, “Please don't say no,” he begged.

You could feel tears pricking in your eyes, “Logan,” you muttered but he just shook your head before you could say anything.

He knew that he could convince you. You two were perfect together and he didnt know what he would do if he were to lose you.

“You said no when I asked you when I was drunk, you said no last night, you said n-” he started to say and you cut him off.

“Yes,” you stated.

His mouth clamped shut. He looked at you with those big wide eyes. Logan had believed that it would take longer to convince you but clearly this had been your answer the whole time.

“I wanna marry you,” you said, just to reinforce your promise.

He chuckled, that big pearly white grin that you loved appearing, “Serious?” He questioned.

“I want that avocado tree and I want that house and I've applied for some jobs I'm teaching in the Silicon Valley area,” you explained.

He didn't even hesitate to kiss you, dipping you slightly as he revelled in the amazing moment that was occurring. This was all he had ever wanted.

When you both pulled away from the kiss, smiling against each other's lips, he pulled the ring out from his pocket with shaky hands.

You grinned at him as he slipped the ring onto your finger, both of you taking a second to admire the look of it

You kissed him again, unable to stay away from him, “We're getting married,” you muttered against his lips.

“We are-” he kissed you again before pulling away, a smirk on his face, “-Mrs Huntzberger,”

#logan huntzberger x reader #logan Huntzberger x you #logan Huntzberger fanfiction #logan huntzberger #logan huntzberger fanfic #gilmore girls #matt czuchry #matt czuchry x reader #gilmore girls x reader #gilmore girls fanfiction #gilmore girls fanfic #gilmore girls year in a life #logan Huntzberger x y/n #mj 1000 followers celebration #midnights celebration

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summerpearlpen · 4 months ago

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Polin Fic Recs - S3 Speculation Fics

Set post-S2, these are many wonderful fics the Polin community wrote before S3's release. These do not follow the S3 synopsis.

1. Inexorable Current by Elizzybeth

General. Regency. Complete. 6,340 words. Under 1 hour read. Starts with the first ball of S3. Penelope and Colin talk. She tells him off for taking liberties with her. Oblivious Colin Bridgerton asks Pen to list these liberties and she does! I love communication. The use of the "inexorable current" metaphor throughout had me swooning for a G-rated romance like Colin when Pen hit him with the remarkable shade of blue compliment.

2. Attachment by lixabiz

Mature. Regency. Complete. 80,050 words. Set post S2. Some elements from the S3 synopsis. Oblivious Colin Bridgerton. Slow burn.

3. You Are the Only Thing In Any Room You're Ever In by Gowingowingone

Explicit. Regency. Complete. 46,047 words. Starting off strong with the letters that Colin wrote to Pen that she never responded to. Penelope is courted by Lord Lumley and Colin is jealous.

4. Call Off Your Ghost by Trisky107

Explicit. Regency. Complete. 71,107 words. Many flashbacks to when Pen and Colin were children. Colin's father Edmund's presence is felt strongly. A touching meditation on what true love is.

5. Thus Will Shine The Dawn by bluemountainbayou

Teen & Up. Regency. Complete. 75,414 words. Penelope is stabbed when out walking with her maid. The Bridgertons save her. Bridgerton family banter. Stubborn Penelope Featherington. Chaotic Colin Bridgerton.

6. Unexpected surprise by Ayamos

Explicit. Regency. Complete. 77,089 words. Colin consumes a large amount of special tea and alcohol and gets Pen alone and unexpectedly pregnant at the second last ball of S2. Colin promptly forgets the whole thing happened the next day. Penelope has her falling out with Eloise at the Featherington ball. Pregnant Penelope is planning an escape with her Whistledown money so she can keep the baby and not be forced to marry. Unexpectantly, Violet invites Penelope to stay at Aubrey Hall to try to repair her friendship with Eloise. Strong Penelope Featherington. Colin is kind and earnest, but painfully oblivious.

#polin #polin fic #polin fic rec #polin fanfiction

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ofstarsandvibranium · 1 month ago

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Precious Truths: Part 17

Fandom: Bridgerton

Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x F!Reader

Summary: After your father finds out you’ve been writing under a male pseudonym, he threatens to marry you off to an atrocious man unless you find yourself a husband within a month’s time.

Series Masterlist

Since coming back to London, you've been getting settled in your new home. You couldn't bare staying in the same home you spent your time with James. It was too painful.

It's not as big as your previous home, but you don't mind. It's more cozy, in your opinion.

Currently, with it being summer, James' younger sisters, Colette and Gabrielle, are staying with you. The twins, now ten and six years old, have matured since you met them at your wedding, but still mischievous.

"Lord help mama and papa when you two come out next year," you smirk, watching the sisters giggle and wave at some of the men that pass by the street below.

Colette looks over her shoulder, "Do you think we'll receive many suitors?"

"Absolutely. Papa will be spending a lot of time shooing suitors away."

Gabrielle turns, mimicking her sister, "And what of you, sister? Will you be looking for another husband?" The twins both watch you carefully. They resemble much like their brother. Their face shaped much like James, their eyes to match.

You hum, "It's much too soon to say. It'll be coming up to a year now since James has passed."

"But what of Mr. Bridgerton? You two are close, yes?" Colette asks and then gets nudged by Gabrielle.

You chuckle, "It is alright. It is a fair question to ask. Benedict and I are very good friends. There was a time we spent apart and didn't contact one another. He's helped me a lot during the mourning period."

The twins giggle at you, "The maids say you look very lovestruck whenever he visits."

You roll your eyes, "Oh yes, they would say that wouldn't they?" You stand from your chair, "Come on. Let's go on a promenade. I think we've spent too much time inside, don't you think?"

_____________________________

Gabrielle and Colette walk arm in arm a few steps ahead of you. Both hold their own parasol. The two make idle chatter with one another while you listen and observe your surroundings. You greet familiar faces as you pass, some whispering about you to one another.

It's an expected occurrence, but still an annoying and very unwelcome one nonetheless.

"Lady Montclair!" You look ahead to see Colin and Penelope, much to your surprise.

Colin waves and you smile as you approach the couple, "Good afternoon, you two. I am, quite frankly, surprised to see you two are still here. Colin didn't your family already leave for your summer estate?"

He nods, "They did, but Pen and I wanted to have a little bit more time to ourselves before we head over there."

You chuckle, "Understood."

Penelope speaks up, "Are you not going to the summer home as well?"

"An invitation was extended but I declined due to James' sisters staying with me for the summer." You gesture to the two young girls a short distance away, giggling and waving at a group of boys their age.

Colin chuckles, "I'm sure my mother can make arrangements for them as well."

"I wouldn't want to intru-"

"Y/N, please. You know you can never intrude," Colin says with a smile, "Besides," he leans in and whispers, "I know Benedict would be very happy if you showed up."

You feel your cheeks heat up and you clear your throat, "I will discuss it with my sisters as well as their mother before I can give an answer."

"We do hope you come, Y/N," Penelope gives you her friendly smile, "It'll be much more fun if you did."

You laugh, "We shall see then. Enjoy your day Mister and Missus Bridgerton." Your friends curtsy and bow to you and continue on their way.

________________________________

Anthony reads over the letter and smirks, "It seems Lady Montclair as well as her sisters will be accompanying us after all."

Benedict sits up from the couch, "She will?" His family smirks and chuckles at his excitement.

Anthony extends the letter to his younger brother, which he receives happily. Benedict reads it over, eyes tracing over your handwriting, a hint of a smile on his lips.

"Wonderful!"

"Don't keep her all to yourself when she's here," Violet warns her son.

Benedict scoffs, "I don't keep her all to myself."

"Yes, do you!" His family reply in unison and Benedict hmphs, plopping onto the couch beside Eloise.

She pats his shoulder, "You'll live."

_________________________________

The twins were very excited to be staying with the Bridgertons for the summer. They were ecstatic when dowager marquess and marchioness had granted permission for them to follow you to Kent. They've been bouncing in their seat the entire journey to Aubrey Hall.

Their jaw drops as the carriage rolls up to the estate, "It's beautiful!"

You look up at the home fondly. You've spent many years here during the summer, your father all too willing to be rid of you. You hope he's found peace now after his passing.

"Girls, welcome to Aubrey Hall," you say when the footman helps you all out of the carriage.

Anthony, Violet, and Benedict greet you at the door.

"Miss and Miss Montclair, welcome to Aubrey Hall," Anthony says with a bow.

The girls giggle out, "Thank you, Lord Bridgerton."

You watch as Violet greets the girls and escorts them to Mrs. Wilson, who will show them to their room.

Anthony greets you, "How nice of you to grace us with your presence. Benedict had a dark cloud looming over him for days."

Benedict glares at his brother, "I have not."

You chuckle, "Yes, well, you'll have to thank your brother for me. Colin and Penelope convinced me to come, besides, I figured it'd be nice for the girls," you watch Colette and Gabrielle scurry up the steps.

Benedict smirks, "How have they been?"

You roll your eyes, "Itching to be out in society already. Next year will be very interesting for me. Mama and papa will be staying in London so the girls can come out to society here. The following year they'll come out in France."

"You'll have your hands full, I assume," Benedict says offering his arm to you.

You let out a deep exhale, "I probably will, but it will give me something to do," you enter the sitting room where the other Bridgertons are waiting.

Hyacinth and Greggory immediately crowd you while Eloise sits patiently. You laugh as you hug the youngest Bridgertons and then move to sit beside Eloise.

"Haven't gone crazy yet, have you?" you ask as you bump shoulders with her.

She scoffs, "Not yet, but thank goodness you're here. If Ben continued to pout much longer, I would have lost it."

Benedict looks offended, "I don't pout!"

"You most certainly do!"

"Just because I'm not smiling, doesn't mean I'm pouting!"

You sit back and watch the siblings argue and you feel yourself feeling a little lighter and happier in their presence.

#benedict bridgerton x reader #benedict bridgerton imagine #benedict bridgerton fic #bridgerton fic #bridgerton imagine

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jimblejamblewritings · 1 year ago

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love letters and second sons | part 2.

Summary: The princess is finally ready to debut in society. But before she does, she decides to disguise herself and see the true faces of the ton.

Warnings for the Series: light sexism in line with the times, light classism in line with the times, mental health stigma, shitty doctor care, smut, suicide attempt (will get it's own warning when the time comes),

Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x princess!reader

Word Count: 4.2k

Previous Part | Series Masterlist

Eloise left to go right across the street while you followed the rest of the family into the dining room. It had been so long since you had a formal sit down breakfast with your family. Your siblings just couldn’t be bothered to come from wherever they were — sometimes in the same house but they still didn’t show. Your father and mother couldn’t make it most of the time. The dining room table could be very lonely sometimes.

You thanked Colin as he pulled out a chair for you before sitting down. Pouring yourself a cup of coffee, you passed the decorated teapot to Daphne before reaching for the small jug of cream. The Bridgertons were very invested in palace life and wanted to know whatever you were allowed to tell them about. You looked up from your coffee when Eloise came back with Penelope Featherington.

Smiling at Penelope, you handed her the box so you wouldn’t forget before you left. Her face dropped.

“What is it?”

“Oh, I don’t want to burden the princess with frivolous matters. We have an addition to our house. My cousin, Marina Thompson has come to stay for the season. But no matter, she can wear my dress. I have plenty already.”

You shook your head. “No matter how frivolous they may be, your problems are the Crown’s problems. I will return tomorrow with another dress for Miss Thompson. Besides, each piece has been chosen specifically for each person. How could Miss Thompson possibly look good in a dress meant to make you look good?”

Penelope smiled. “Is it alright if I open it here?”

“Of course, Pen,” Anthony said.

She carefully placed the lid of the box on the ground and ruffled through the pieces until she found the dress with her name pinned on it. She pulled out a dress of emerald green, just emerald green. No patterns insight. The sleeves were flatter than the balloon sleeves normally worn but that was because they were sheer with beading on them.

“Wow. It is beautiful.”

“The princess will be glad to hear that you like it. Now, I am very sorry but I have to go now. A midmorning promenade cannot be missed.”

Everyone stood up when you did.

“Well, yes, of course,” Violet said. “Will you return for breakfast tomorrow? Or whenever is a good time for you?”

You weren’t stupid. Either the Dowager Viscountess wanted your fake persona to marry her son — probably the third son, Colin, since you were a valet. Or she wanted the princess to marry her son. In that case it must have been Anthony. You took your cloak from the footman it put it back on.

“I shall see if I can appear tomor— this weekend. Before the Danbury ball, the family wants to go to the countryside. I shall be back here then.”

“Lovely.”

You stepped outside, taking the alleyways back to the palace. Pandora let out a breath when the painting finally moved. You stepped inside.

“Have you been here the whole time?”

“Yes, I have. Was your time outside fun?”

“Absolutely, I will be doing it again later.”

“What? Princess, please.”

“Pandora, you don’t understand. It was amazing. One of the best times of my life.”

“Y/N. What if your illness st—”

“Then I shall deal with that when it happens. Oh, I met people. The houses in the ton are very nice.”

“You went to someone’s house?” Pandora’s voice rose three octaves as she tried to stay quiet.

“Just the Bridgertons. Their mother is very sweet. She invited me to a recurring breakfast whenever I have the time.”

“Really?”

“Yes, and the rumors about them are true. The daughters are all beautiful. Their youngest son seems very nice.”

“And the three eldest boys?”

“Absolutely handsome. Especially the eldest.”

The two of you giggled as you kept sharing what they looked like in person while you got ready for your promenade. The gardens were dreadfully boring but you felt better just thinking about going to the Bridgertons house next time. It could have been anyone but you were glad it was a large family and a family friend. Only your first day out and you already became acquainted with two families. That was a success in your book.

~~~

“Princess! Princess Y/N! Your Highness!”

You could hear the yelling down the hall. Looking over at your father, you smiled.

“Thank you for talking with me about the ball, Mr. Jupiter. I think I should let them know I am alive.”

“Go. I shall still be here.”

You shimmied out from under the bed, George laughing at you the entire time. The bed wasn’t your favorite place to be but it was your father’s favorite place. You preferred the wardrobe. Swinging open the door, you spotted Brimsley running down the hall.

“I’m right here!”

He turned with a quickness. “Oh thank God. The Queen and King are requesting you actually attend breakfast with them instead of in the kitchens or your room.”

“Father? How could he tell you? He’s right he—”

“Yes. He usually stays in his wing. He came down earlier this morning.”

You looked back at your bed. No one was there. George’s feet weren’t sticking out from the end of the bed. You bit your lip and didn’t say anything, choosing just to follow Brimsley to the dining room. If anyone found out you had a fit then there was no hope of your mother letting you go anywhere. It shouldn’t have been a surprise. Whenever you were anxious or stressed, a fit was bound to happen. Maybe you should have been taking your medicine. But it didn’t make you feel good at all. Tomorrow you’d ask for a change in medicine or doctor.

Your father looked better when you reached downstairs, actually cognizant, and your mother seemed happy. None of your other siblings were there. Pulling out your chair you sat down. The conversation went in one ear and out the other. You answered where necessary and that was about it. You needed to be perfect. When there was a lull in the talking, you found the perfect opportunity to speak.

“Mother, may I go to Lady Danbury’s ball?”

“No.”

“I promise I will be on my be—”

“No.”

“If I have a fit then I will go stra—”

“Y/N, do not make me repeat myself.”

“But I just want to know why? All of my brothers and sisters were allowed to introduce themselves well before this age. Why am I still waiting?”

“Dear, we’ve been over this.”

“But Edward and Sophia both have the same illness and they were all—”

“Because no one is as bad as yours!” Charlotte looked up from her plate when you grew silent. She sighed at the sight of your crestfallen face. “Y/N, dear, you know I didn’t mean it like that. I’m only talking about your illness, not you as a person… give me four months. Four months to prepare everything, then I will let you go, whether an incident happens or not. Just follow the rules and keep yourself safe.”

“Thank you, Mother. I do have one more question.”

“Yes?”

“May I stay at Kew?”

“Kew?” Both your mother and father said at the same time.

“I have incidents whether I am here or with Father or by myself. We don’t have strong evidence that anything makes it better or worse. Kew is far enough that I’m not tempted by the city but close enough that I will not miss it. And I can still speak to the people.”

In reality it’s because your parents never went to Kew. You wanted privacy and to not be under such a watchful eye. And if you could bring your court then absolutely no one would find out that you went into the city.

Charlotte gave George a look. “Yes, the people do seem to love your letters. Okay, alright. I will allow you to stay at Kew but your father and I and your physician will be coming every Sunday to check on you. Brimsley and Reynolds will be going with you.”

“Okay.”

Buckingham wasted no time packing your things and taking them to Kew after the Danbury ball. You flopped onto your bed, happy to be left alone finally. Only half of your court came with you to Kew. The others were “dismissed” for the season — you wouldn’t need them again until you introduced yourself to society. Really you just needed them to stay at Buckingham and report to you what was happening. Naturally, Pandora came to Kew.

The home looked just the same as when you were younger. The first thing you did was instruct every curtain to be open. The grounds were extensive and private. You weren’t in London but just outside of it. No one could see the place at all so there was no need to hide behind window decorations.

“I should like dinner outside,” you said as you sat down in the short grassy part of the front lawn.

“Outside?”

“Yes. It’s very nice today. I would like to sit outside and eat and plan my new schedule. You and Reynolds can go to the cottage on the grounds. Turn left and you’ll see a bunch of cottages across the stream. Go to the third one. It’s behind a smattering of trees but the hedges there cover everything. You can see people before they see you.”

“I’m sorry?” Brimsley’s eyes went wide.

“I’ve known since I was five. I don’t think you two believed that a five year old could be observant but I was.” You turned back to look at him. “Well, I do not care. Brimsley, you should know I couldn’t possibly care about anything like that. With my issues I could never judge someone. Not for what you look like, your class, whoever you choose to pray to which is really none of my business. I don't like to sit in church anyway and much prefer prayer alone in the gazebo. It also doesn't matter who you... share a cottage with."

“Your Highness.”

“I will keep your secret, Brimsley,” you reassured him. “Besides, when the time comes I will need for you to keep mine.”

“Secrets? You have secrets? I didn't know... What would I be keeping?”

“You’ll know it when it happens.”

“Yes, Your Highness.”

“Brimsley!” you yelled before he could step inside the house to tell them what you wanted to eat. “About what I said just then.”

“It is no trouble at all, Your Highness.”

“No, not my secrets… I would never tell anyone. Whether you kept my secret or not. I promise you that.”

“Thank you.”

“I will find a way to make it better.”

Brimsley gave you a sad smile. “The effort alone is appreciated.”

You gave him a determined look before returning to making your schedule. You didn’t have a need for full time tutors anymore, having finished formal schooling years ago.

So you put all your special tutors to come on Tuesday and Wednesday, your parents visiting on Sunday, you’d write all your letters on Thursday, and then waste away on Monday, Friday, and Saturday. A schedule your parents greatly approved of as they stated that you needed plenty of days to rest and not overwork yourself before you make the illness worse. Of course you didn’t tell them that those days were for going into the city.

Monday morning you picked flowers to make a bouquet for the Featheringtons since you had only met one of them in person. Not that you needed it but you opened your book of flowers to see the meanings. You did hope that flower language would catch on more in a few years.

Taking your hand pruning shears, you started cutting both from the garden and the greenhouses. Basil for good wishes. White Carnations to wish a pure love. White Jasmine for amiability. Yellow lilies for happiness. Pink roses also for happiness. Bells of Ireland for good luck. You handed the first set of flowers to Brimsley before starting on individual bouquets for the four young women of the house.

For Prudence: daisies for innocence, dandelions for faithfulness and happiness, peonies for a happy life and a happy marriage. For Phillippa: dandelions for faithfulness and happiness, fern for sincerity, honeysuckle for bonds of love. For Penelope: lady’s mantle for comfort, lily of the valley for sweetness, wallflower for faithfulness in adversity. For Marina: camellias for affection, lavender roses for enchantment, daffodils for good fortune.

You also collected flowers for the Bridgertons, small individual bouquets. Only two types of flower in each bouquet. For Violet: acacia for friendship and violet for her name.

For Anthony: acalia for temperance and agrimonia for gratitude. For Benedict: balm gentle for pleasantry and bearded crepis for protection. For Colin: chamomile for energy in adversity and coriander for hidden worth. For Daphne: daphne for her name and dandelions for happiness.

For Eloise: elderflower for zealousness and elephant’s ear for good luck. For Francesca: fern leaves for fascination and flower-of-an-hour for delicate beauty. For Gregory: garden chervil for sincerity and geranium, scarlet color, for comfort. For Hyacinth: hawthorn for hope and hyacinth for her name.

“This should do.”

“Shall we send them now?”

“Oh, no, Brimsley. I shall take them with me.”

“With you?” he squeaked.

“Yes. I assume now would be a good time as ever to divulge my secret to you and Reynolds. Pandora already knows. I go out to see the ton. I have already done this a few times now.”

Reynolds and Brimsley looked like they were going to faint. You laughed as you took your cloak from Pandora. You had no concern with anyone finding out since the two men in front were still in the gardens instead of running back to Kew to pen a letter.

“Please ready the carriage. I’ve already missed breakfast as it is, I don’t want to be any later.”

The only two things that freaked out your valets even more were entirely your fault as well. Reynolds stuttered through confusion when you refused the mask he was about to hand you. Brimsley actually did faint when you got out of the carriage before reaching the Bridgerton house. You turned around when he came to again.

“The carriage is too recognizable. Until I get something more plain th—”

“Just say the princess gave it to you for business affairs!” Brimsely yelled so loudly that you were concerned someone would hear it.

For a moment you were ready to ignore his plea but then you realized he was right. Plus, you did already set up that poor women and rich women were treated equal in your court — something that was true but you only had three lower class women in your court to begin with. You got back into the carriage, knee bouncing the entire way.

Peering out the window, you spotted Marshall. He titled his head a bit as you turned around, seemingly scolding someone inside, tilting even more when you walked in the opposite direction of their house. An older woman greeted you at the door of the Featherington home. You repeated the same thing you told Marshall the first time you came to the Bridgerton family.

“Please come in. They’re in the drawing room, now… Ma’am, a visitor.”

You curtsied as you entered their drawing room, waving to Penelope. “Hello… Woah, there are a lot of men. I’m sorry I was unaware we had already begun calling.”

Lady Featherington put on her best smile. “Yes, what is it?”

“Right. I am the Young Princess’ lady in waiting. She has made bouquets for you all. Well, as well as bouquets for the Bridgertons but rest assured I know exactly which ones belong to you.”

The Featheringtons looked more than pleased to be receiving flowers after dresses, especially Lady Featherington. All the suitors were looking at them like winning prizes. To be favored by the princess is to have everyone’s hand in your lap and every name on your dance card. You read out what each flower meant and gave them a card that had them written down in case they were to forget.

“Thank you so much, Miss?”

“Beckett.”

“Miss Beckett. Please inform the princess that we are forever grateful for such a thoughtful gift. If it is no trouble would you like some biscuits or tea?”

You decided to stay for a few minutes. Besides, watching suitors fall over their feet to impress women seemed like a very entertaining morning. Thanking the old woman for the tea, you took a sip before setting down the cup when you noticed Colin. He waved to you before making a bored face.

Clearly, he hadn’t been the first one to arrive for calling. You supposed that was the issue with all four of your girls out at once. There was only one drawing room so all of their suitors would have to wait their turn even if they were there for a different girl, at least until Lord Featherington came home and then maybe he could chaperone outside in the garden. You now understood why the Bridgertons were okay with Eloise delaying her debut. Focusing on only one woman is plenty enough.

Daphne had written to you that she had received no callers but none of the other Bridgertons had spoken about calling or the marriage mart at all. You only looked up from the mess of suitors when Eloise arrived, pulling up a chair at the small table you and Penelope were sitting at. Pen tapped your shoulder.

You looked down at the overgrown rat in her arms. It was your turn to mind the dog that one of the gentlemen calling thought would be appropriate as a gift. Rolling your eyes, you took it anyway and began bouncing it like a child. At least it was a very calm dog.

Your two friends laughed as you jumped when another gentleman began reciting a poem very loudly. Everyone was starting to fall asleep. His performance was both bad and boring, a combination you were hoping couldn’t be accomplished today. The sound of Lady Featherington’s clapping was the only thing that woke everyone up. She all but pushed the men out, saying the girls had seen enough suitors today. You frowned at her telling the gentlemen to say goodbye to even Penelope. Even? They should just be saying goodbye because she was a lady and in the house. Colin came over to you guys.

“A most wretched sonnet indeed.”

You laughed before standing up to leave with him, trying not to eavesdrop on their conversation. The two of them had such a close bond. You were sure that they’d end up with each other. He was probably here for her, waiting for a chance when Marina’s suitors were done. Handing Colin his flowers, you abandoned him for the drawing room of his house — pausing in your tracks when you saw a man you didn’t recognize.

Violet jumped up along with Hyacinth and Francesca. “Oh, Miss Beckett, hello. We weren’t expecting you after you missed breakfast.”

“Yes, I was preoccupied with the princess. I’m sorry am I intruding?”

“No.” Daphne all but ran to meet you. “What do you have with you?”

“The princess made bouquets.” You leaned in close. “I am very sorry about what Whistledown wrote. You didn’t deserve that. Perhaps flowers can cheer you up?”

“Thank you so much.”

“Where are the others? I shall give these to them then promptly return.”

“Yes, please do,” Daphne said before having to return to her caller.

Violet took her flowers from you. “Gregory is in the garden or with his brothers. More than likely his brothers. They are either in…”

“Yes?”

“Well they are in their rooms but I can’t just let you go in alo— It’s much too dangerous for a woman. The ton wo—”

“I don’t see why I cannot seeing as I am the princ—” you stopped yourself. “Uh, the princess’ valet. I’m on official business from her and where she can go, I can go.”

She still seemed unsure.

“Besides, I am not a lady.”

At that, Violet let you go upstairs but her face didn’t relax on any of the tension it held. You held onto the wooden railing as you skipped up the steps. You realized that you should have asked Violet which rooms were theirs. But it was too late now. Going back down would just be a matter of inconvenience and take longer in your return to Daphne’s aid. And not to mention, you were a princess. You didn’t need permission to enter anywhere, it was just polite to ask. Opening each door, you sighed in relief when one finally led to a bedchamber with people inside. Anthony looked up, setting down one of his many ledgers.

“Beckett, what are you doing here?”

At the sound of your name Gregory, who had been sitting on his older brother’s bed as he engrossed himself in some reading, looked up. “Beckett!”

You handed them both the bouquets. “Courtesy of the princess, not my doing.”

They chuckled as they took their bouquets from your arms. You heard the door creak behind you as it opened more. Turning, you came face to face with the second eldest Bridgerton. Benedict smiled.

“I knew I heard Gregory call for you.”

“Here. For you.”

“Thank you. How long will you be staying?”

“For dinner but then I must leave afterwards. So, what shall we do up here?”

“Up here?” Anthony raised his eyebrows. “Alone? Miss Beckett, I do not think it… it is improper for us to be alone with you.”

You scoffed. “Impropriety.”

“It is true.”

“Firstly, I am not exactly bound by your rules of society. Second, we aren’t alone unless you are insinuating that anything would happen because you either can’t control yourself or are oddly content to share me with your brother.” You enjoyed watching them both stutter through a reply.

“But if someone were to see us.”

“Does this window face the front of the street?”

“No.”

“Can anyone see anything in the back?”

“No.”

“Then no one is to see anything. Especially when nothing is happening. And lastly, I am not unchaperoned.”

“You aren’t?”

You pointed to the youngest Bridgerton in the room. “Gregory is not a man but a child. Therefore someone who is not an available bachelor is watching and supervising us.”

He grinned, not even caring that he was called a child. “Yeah. I’m very good at watching.”

You could do nothing but laugh as you flopped over Anthony’s bed and asked Gregory to hand you a book he was finished with.

Benedict blinked. “I guess I cannot argue with that. I’ll go get my charcoals and come back.”

“Ah, right, but first let me eavesdrop on Daphne and Nigel. Almost forgot.”

“Lord Berbrooke?”

“Don’t make me laugh by giving him a title.”

When you returned, the boys had found their way into a comfortable silence. They barely acknowledged your presence when you sat down. Per Anthony’s request, the door didn’t just stay unlocked or ajar but completely open. Benedict looked away from his paper and at you.

“What do you mean you aren’t bound by rules of society?”

“I said your rules.”

He rolled his eyes. "Okay, then. Our rules."

“The rules of the upper class and the ton. I am bound by royal rules and royal rules only which you’d be surprised to find are very different from the rules of the ton… I should suggest to the princess that she must write about those rules.”

“And what are royal rules then?”

“The only one that pertains to you is that it isn’t a crime for a royal or a member of their court to be unchaperoned while around the opposite sex.”

Violet decided to go upstairs after seeing Lord Berbrooke out their front door, utterly exhausted. She just needed a few moments of rest before going back to Daphne. Passing by her son’s room, she paused. Anthony was at his desk working, Gregory was sitting at the head of the bed reading, you laid flopped across it with several things around you, and Benedict was sitting on the floor leaning against the side of the bed with his art supplies spread out all around. The sight could be considered improper but Violet refused to interrupt.

“Anthony, come look at Benedict’s work and tell him it is better than he gives himself credit for.”

Violet watched her son take his ledgers and come sit by Benedict, who had cleared enough of his supplies away for his brother, right underneath where you were laying. Not caring, you rested your chin on top of his head so you wouldn’t lose balance as you pointed to where you liked Benedict’s sketch. You couldn’t help but laugh as Anthony stiffened up for a moment.

“You’re worse than Brimsley. I already told you that I am not a lady. Calm yourself.”

“Brimsley?”

“The Queen’s temporarily former valet. He moved to Kew with us.”

“The family now stays at Kew?”

“No, just the princess. It was a gift of sorts as she’s the only child to live there. It is a chance to live alone and like a proper adult before her introduction to society.”

Gregory became interested once again. “We’ll get to see the princess soon? When?”

“Roughly four months if all goes well… You know, I must take you all to Kew one day.”

“That sounds lovely.”

Violet smiled as she continued heading to her destination. You and Anthony seemed to be headed towards friendship. If you really did take him to Kew then he would get to meet the princess alone.

(part 3)

THIS FIC TAGLIST:

@fredsbetch @cherrylovers-world @chrystinaamanda @grassclippers @flyestvenustrap

PERMANENT TAGLIST:

@venomsvl @peaches-n-sunscreen @summerellaz @supernaturallover2002 @sambucky8 @9daykrisr @thebitchinleo @23victoria @scarlets-widow @pagetpagetpagetpaget @lovexnatasha @awesomebooklover17 @1234-angelika @imatrisk @blackreaderatrisk @princess-jules47 @alexloveskili @a-marie-a @siriuslysirius1107 @i-have-no-life-charlie @daykrisr999

#benedict fluff #benedict bridgerton x reader #benedict bridgerton #benedict x reader #bridgerton #benedict bridgerton

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moirindeclermont · 1 year ago

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Another Colin analysis

aka this is all I'm talking about now, sorry not sorry. I was talking with my fandom spouse (💕), and we were saying that there is something about Colin that exudes Gentle!Dom vibe.

I already touched on this, because I absolutely love Gentle!Dom Colin, but the piece I want to add is this: if you think Colin cannot possibly be a dom, is because you have a very different idea on what being a dom is.

Thing is, I get that Colin is not a dom in the traditional sense. He has moments of authority but he is not authoritative by nature, he doesn't command, he would never tell Pen "you have to do this because I say so". In that sense, he is not a dom. If your definition of being a dom is this particular thing, I get that Colin doesn't belong in this realm.

Instead, what Colin has is a more subtle version. I always use this metaphor but it's the one more apt for me: Colin is a perfect dancing partner, because he does lead, but doesn't command. When you dance in a couple, most of the time you find either leads who don't lead at all or leads who think leading means making you do whatever they want. The balance is a lead who proposes a step and you accept it - they are so rare to be found and they make the perfect dance partners.

Colin is right into that special league. And for him, it does translate from the dance floor to the bed and more generally into every aspect of his life with Pen. Now, in this season we see this aspect especially in the intimacy scenes, because that is where it shines brighter, but the more Colin settles into married life the more it will come out also in other aspects.

Moreover, Colin is a provider by nature. He enjoys taking care of the people he loves. This also translates into the Dom side. Two doms could do the same thing to their sub, and yet they can be vastly different in the undertones and the energy that they bring to the scene. There is no right or wrong as long as it is sane, consensual and safe, of course, but I'd like to bring a new perspective into the idea of what being a Dom is, ultimately.

Personally, like in dancing, I vastly prefer someone who leads and leaves me with my agency, in contrast with someone who orders me around. Unless insecure or angry, and even in that case, it's a rare occurrence, Colin does not seek to order Pen around. He wants to provide for her, take care of her, lift her burdens, give her all the pleasure in the world, and be there for her, but it's never a command, it's a request. And that makes all the difference in the world.

When a dynamic like that is established, it allows the partners to grow into their power and capabilities, and they become better partners because of it. Over time, this will allow Pen to outgrow her insecurities and truly blossom (we already saw part of this, but think of how much more we can get of that in a later season).. and it allows for a switch in roles.

Over time Pen can become a Dom too. She has everything she needs, but of course, it takes time and confidence to take on that role as well. Colin, with his soft guidance, is giving Pen exactly that. Five, or ten years in the future, they can take the role of Dom according to the other needs in no time, but that can happen only when the relationship is based on partnership.

And it's a beautiful thing to see a dynamic like that portrayed with such grace by Nic and Luke. Not because it's the first time - it's not - that tv shows such dynamics, but because it allows people to understand that assertiveness is vastly different from authoritativeness, and that is a thing way too many people still need to know.

Do you understand why I'll never give up on Polin, I fall in love with them in a new way every day

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dollypopup · 2 months ago

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no, but why didn't we get Colin's letters??????

words truly cannot convey what a missed opportunity glossing over the letters was. why didn't we get a voice over of Colin reading them? or see what Penelope did with them? he sent all these letters and Penelope didn't reply. He was clearly feeling that! He was carrying that around with him. It's why he tried out a new facade in the first place! You know what would have been such a damn good scene that would do SO much with building the narrative of how much Pen loves him? And how much Polin is about being mirrors to each other?

having her read his letters on screen

Sure, build up to it. Can't happen at the start. Not when she's trying to find a husband or after Colin apologized to her. It's not about the immediate satisfaction. It's about showing how Penelope changes and matures and grows as a character that she CAN revisit them, about who Colin is and what he sends, how he sounds, the cadence of his voice when he writes to someone he cares about, discussing subjects he's passionate for. About their connection itself getting stronger or repairing after being frazzled by the LW reveal and the ghosting and the lies and and and

You can't tell me that after they're married, she's not reading his letters. You CANNOT TELL ME that she's laying in that big bed all alone, feeling such distance from him, not recognizing that she had put him in a similar position over the off season. He said and did something that hurt her heart and she froze him out from her affections. SHE said and did something that hurt HIS heart and now he froze her out in turn. When Colin reads HER letters to feel close to her, it's such a beautiful moment of the audience seeing how much he cherishes her.

why don't we get a similar scene with her? because chat, I won't lie, it rubs me the wrong way. It rubs me the wrong way, chat. That he sat down and had a whirlwind of a travel adventure for his final year studying on his grand tour and wrote and wrote and wrote and had NO IDEA why no one was replying and felt that profound loneliness so close to his skin but turned around and blamed himself and we know it because we have THIS fragment of his journal

which in part reads:

After my travels last year when I wrote so much and received very few replies. I am trying out a new personality. A new way of seeing the world and interacting with others. I want to be less needy, less insecure, while still maintaining the core of my vulnerability that makes me who I am.

and chat, I do not understand. I do not get it, chat. Penelope, who criticized him for being fake, who canonically has read parts of his journal, coming across THIS entry? It would break her heart into pieces.

AND I NEED TO SEE IT.

I NEED to see that she cherishes him the way he cherishes her. That she didn't just cast his letters out into the fire in her frustration with him. That she didn't throw him away, even when she was upset. Because he doesn't throw her away when he's upset! And you know what? Even if she did, for us to see her have some remorse for it! She was so hungry to read his journal, and then got letter after letter from him? Of COURSE she's reading those letters! That journal is an insight into his thought process with himself, but the letters are insight into his thought process with her.

And you know what? I want to see her write him letters constantly in the next season. Like a regency equivalent of love letters on post-it notes plastered all up in their house. I want him to wake up to another letter from her even when she slept right beside him that night but had to wake up early for whatever reason so, here, have this letter hand-crafted with her heart in the quill just because. Just because she loves him.

Colin is so good at apologies, namely because they always have actions that follow up to show he's understood what harm he caused and how he's committed to fixing it. And yes, Penelope apologized, but it didn't have much action behind it. I think Penelope NEEDS to understand that part of Colin's insecurities come from her. Her actions. Her lies. Come from that off season where she did not answer him and gave no reason why. Come from saying he loved her and not having her say it back. Colin builds his bridge about her being LW and gets over it largely on his lonesome. We stan an emotionally mature and available man!

But. . .Penelope doesn't have much hand in that. Even when she tells him she wrote about him because she wanted the Colin she knew back. That was a lie. But she can have that Colin back! THROUGH HIS LETTERS!!! Which we should see her read!!!

Anywho, I like to believe that Penelope felt some remorse for their distance and once she knows just how much her not replying hurt him, perhaps via journal entry, one way for her to heal over that harm is to write to him. Why wouldn't she write to him even when they live together? They spent months not doing so. Surely she misses it. And it would be cute. A love language on her part to show him how much she cares. I need Colin to discover that oh she kept them, all those letters he sent. She didn't answer, but I want him to know she read them. I want him to know she likes them. Colin does so much processing on his own, and that's important. But it's okay for her to go 'this thing I did hurt you, and this is how I'll fix it'.

Because look: we all know that an enormous part of Colin's insecurities are because he has been rejected. By his family, by his society, by the one person he believed would never forsake him. He understands why she did, but she still did, and it would do a lot for him to know she didn't just discard him, even if his self esteem isn't great and he'd blame himself alone for the breakdown in communication. And it would do a lot for him to get letters from her again.

Do you KNOW how much shorter their freeze out post-wedding would have been if when he went to get a blanket, he found Penelope reading his letters from the last season? That she kept them? That she keeps them close? Do you KNOW how much that pours into the intimacy between the two of them? Just imagine it

"What are you doing?" "I should think it to be obvious." "Why read them, now?" ". . .because I miss you."

Imagine the parallels. Imagine her delivering 'I miss you' the same way he delivered it. Imagine how conflicted that would make him, pleased and in love but aching and sad all at once. The angst. The romance. The romangst. Think about all we could have!!!

#bridgerton #polin #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #penelope bridgerton #what do you mean y'all just dropped so casually #'haha yeah colin was traveling for months on end and wrote letter after letter that almost no one replied to'#'so when he came back he became super closed off and artifice in order to protect his very tender heart'#and then did NOTHING about that save have him mention how he missed pen #and then blame himself again for her ghosting him????#like yeah my man definitely did right by apologizing but pen couldn't have even been like 'let's talk when you're back'?#she has apologies to deliver too!#i have been rebitten by my hyperfixation and now i'm going to make it everyone's problem

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