#me since you don’t coddle because tbh I was just pissed like why is me not trusting a psychiatrist turning into this big fucking thing AND

[placeinthisworld]

heyy, I don’t know if you’ve felt this way but the swiftlyneutral has become so filled with people that want to coddle Taylor so much. Awhile back I was having this back and forth exchange with somebody where they had said that regarding Palestine what can Taylor swift even do and that she shouldn’t have to do anything. I mentioned that hey her billions of dollars can certainly help alot of Palestinians begging for donations.

then the goal post moved to that sure she can make a difference but it won’t really change anything on a grand scale and we don’t control her actions and why am I even using internet connection rather than donating that money and it’s like my god dude my money going towards internet connection is not the same as Taylor swift’s billions like what and we might not control her actions but let’s not pretend that public pressure does nothing. Also I find it weird how everybody keeps saying that these celebrities speaking out does nothing and it’s like are you not seeing the families whose gofundme goals are being fulfilled in a matter of hours compared to the months before like I get that because this is a massive crisis on every level that sometimes it feels hopeless but on an individual level the families who are closer to safety through these donations are obviously going to prefer this than us doing nothing because it makes a world of a difference to them.

then it has devolved into insults about how they knew more than me cuz they were older apparently ( when they don’t even know my age but okay ) and it’s like I genuinely don’t know why people think it makes them smarter to think nothing will actually change so let’s not do anything and literally I have not seen a single person who is advocating for the focus to be solely on celebrities but it is certainly a part of it. I don’t know how there are still people especially on that sub that actually believe that Taylor swift’s billion dollars or that her voice won’t make a difference like how are we still stuck at that part of the convo.

I won’t lie it especially pissed me off when they kept insinuating I don’t actually understand or care about what’s happening to the Palestinians when my own people and country has gone through a genocide and I’m not claiming my advocacy is perfect but I do understand it and I have actually known about Palestine since I was very young.

I’m sorry this was so long I just needed to rant. I kind of hate that that sub has gained so much attention since the album release cuz now it’s becoming filled with people who are deflecting even the most basic Taylor criticism but hide it behind this guise of aloofness. Sorry for any mistakes cuz English isn’t my first language.

GROSSS wtf i’m sorry you had that interaction that is so shitty i’m sorry bestie :(

ugh yeah the funniest think about the argument of “taylor doesn’t owe us anything” (in terms of speaking out against racism, palestine, etc) is that she has SHOWN us that she cares!! there was a long ass period where she was sending her fans money to help pay for shit like school and rent!! she knows she can make an impact! SHE KNOWS SHE CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE. but she’s still sooooo quiet?? it’s unacceptable tbh, especially with her billionaire status it’s just so icky to me that she hasn’t ONCE acknowledged that genocide in Palestine. like not a simple like about a post about it, not a retweet, not a donation not a donation link. NOTHING even though she knows she’s the most influential person in the world rn.

i’ve honestly never seen anything like that on the subreddit myself. but i also only really go on there and glance through the forums and i don’t really engage much on the platform so maybe that’s why i haven’t seen it much :(

[yslkook]

I was wondering since you’re desi what’s your opinion on Indian cultural appropriation in kpop? How is it being a desi fan but also being a kpop fan? A lot of people say that some Indian fans overreact when their faves wear bindis or maang tikkas because other Indian fans aren’t offended. And some people claim that it isn’t even Indian culture. I hope you don’t mind me asking this?

hello, i def dont mind and i dont mind discussing things like this. as a general statement though, at the end of the day, these people are not my friends. i (and everyone else) dont know what they care about and what they dont care about- and im tired of people giving them the benefit of the doubt when it comes to straight up cultural appropriation. all i know and can comment on is their actions, or lack thereof. ill be honest, im pretty new to kpop in general. but you dont have to be an old fan to see how deep this runs. i cant say how much of this is pure, genuine ignorance though...all i can hope for is that they listen when people speak up.

as a south asian fan...it frustrates me for two diff reasons. 1. because cultural appropriation is not ok, we are in 2021, and these companies/idols need to do better, and people dont get to dictate when they are upset that their culture is being appropriated 2. i hope that we can discuss cultural appropriation across all cultures without focusing on only indian cultural appropriation

i don't think it's anyone's place to say that indians or hindus are overreacting when they're upset that kpop idols with no connection to being indian or hindu or south asian wear bindis or maang tikkas, even if not every single indian person is offended by it. idk who's claiming that bindis are not native to the indian subcontinent LMAO because they definitely are. and also a lot of hindus in south east asia wear bindis too.

for me PERSONALLY....when i see people who are not south asian or hindu wearing the bindi or the maang tikka, i kinda just side eye them and am like okay...why are you doing this...like when i saw miss jennie wearing a bindi in the one music video, i was like okay...the one individual, isolated instance didnt make me super upset. BUT HOWEVER when you compound everything and ask WHY do people feel that its ok to culturally appropriate like this when 1. no type of acknowledgement is given 2. your FANS are hurt in the process 3. it's clearly done for the aesthetic an no other reason... idk what to say other than it's messed up

and also for ME, i have a bone to pick with this because the same things that i and other south asians have been ostracized for are being touted like this for what?? for the aesthetic?

tbh the whole issue of cultural appropriation in general in kpop is a HUGE problem. of black culture (i mean....this one is obvious), indigenous culture (bts and their teepee in that one video idk where from), and its sad that despite the blatant instances of it, people will continue to coddle their idols and ignore the issue. how many kpop groups have apologized for wearing blackface? using slurs? how many idols have worn locs or dreads?

if youre gonna use the aesthetic of a culture that is not yours you better be prepared to face the callouts and repercussions. i just think if kpop has become as global at is has, it's their responsibility to be aware of how these things upset their fans. and also, kpop is so heavily influenced by western sounds...i.e.: rap, hip-hop, rnb. i do not think that it's asking too much for these idols and entertainment companies to get a fucking clue, especially considering how pervasive kpop has become in recent years.

maybe someone can argue that pointing these things out is so very american or western...that not everything is about americans or westerners...but how is that a defense when other people of color are continuously hurt

here are some examples of south asian cultural appropration in kpop

here is another article abt black cultural appropriation in kpop. one of the comments pissed me off lol

[jennycalendar]

Always here for Giles/Jenny romance tbh. Like I said, I've hyperfocused on Giles so all my thoughts revolve around him so I'm always happy to have Jenny thrown back at me in response! Now of course, since Edna's shown up, her sisters must follow; enter Lavinia and Sophronia Fairweather, eternally young and hilariously vain. And Ripper's response is to throw his head back and groan dramatically because oh my god. Not my great aunts. Not here. Why. But truthfully they visit solely to see how 1/7

he is because wow his dad is pissed but Edna’s been rather cheerful? Which honestly they had to see what that was about, barely anything can cause those two to fall out, and goodness Ripper look at you! So tall and handsome and responsible! Such lovely taste in subtle punk fashion! But they can’t believe he’s still got that goddamn Citroën, the only thing that consistently works in that car is the radio and he refuses to change it from Planet Rock. Now, as revealed in the Angel&Faith comics 2/7

Vin and Sophie do feel responsible for getting their great nephew shoved into the academy so young since they caused the situation in which he first manifested his magic in front of his father and Gran. So seeing him not only breaking away from that in a halfway healthy manner but with Edna’s approval? They’re thrilled. They also tease and coddle him, which makes the rest of the Scoobies laugh but kinda uncomfortable at the same time, but for all of Ripper’s blustering he does love his aunts 3/7

(don’t you dare tell them) and he does appreciate their concern and their pride but can they please just stop by for an afternoon instead of a week? He can only handle them in small bursts. Also RIPPER’S BAND. Now I can handle Sunnydale being their last tour spot, a smaller thing to wind down as it ends, and while I can certainly see them nopeing straight outta town I also kinda want to keep them? We only saw them briefly in a few panels of the comic but they had such a great dynamic 4/7

with the drummer guy calling Ripper on his half-arsed performance, the bass lady giving him this fond-amused look when he’s horrified to see his unimpressed Gran after assuming it was a groupie, and though the other guitarist laughs along with the drummer about Ripper having a posh Gran he’s also sheepishly apologetic afterwards and they all leave so he can talk with her. I wanna see these guys stick around and be the friends Ripper’s own age he lacks in canon. Maybe they come back after 5/7

(understandably) getting out of there? Because they’re a good band but they know they’re not as good without Ripper and dammit they miss the bastard. Not to mention the fans are super distressed. They do a livestream to show said fans that Ripper’s fine he’s just adopted several kids in fucking Halloween Town ffs man. And they tease and snark at him but he’s comfortable snarking back and it’s this nice easy thing even before various Sunnydale occurences forge stronger bonds 6/7

And actually they do notice that Ripper seems way better than he has been in general? And they do a few more song recordings for youtube and hey look he’s bringing his A game again! And they’re all British too so he’s not the only one and it’s just good because friendship is. So good. If only the cute bassist lady would stop flirting with his maybe-sorta-girlfriend-i-guess, that’d the great. 7/7

there are SO MANY THINGS I LOVE ABOUT THIS so here i shall throw some concepts back at u

1) jenny and buffy immediately interrogate ripper’s aunts for embarrassing childhood stories, bc they’re much easier marks than ripper’s grandmother or his dad (they think everything they’re telling is So Cute and So Sweet). buffy writes them all down. ripper is hiding his face in his hands. jenny genuinely thinks the stories are sweet but tries her best to pretend that she’s making fun of ripper bc. u know. wouldn’t want to look Soft

2) cordelia immediately starts trying to get herself into ripper’s good graces so she’ll let him sing with the band, because they’ve got a bunch of views on youtube and she’s always wanted to be an online personality and she definitely has the looks for it so please ripper please ripper please ripper????? this thankfully ends after she sees one of their performances and decides that they don’t have the right Style for her to make her online debut with them. ripper has never been more grateful for cordelia’s concepts of sophistication

3) the band loves buffy. she tags along with ripper to practice and asks lots of questions and they think her puns are amazing. their music isn’t actually her cup of tea but she really really loves seeing ripper in what she calls his “natural habitat” (read: she really loves seeing ripper genuinely happy & with friends his own age) so she hangs out in the back and does homework with willow.

4) ripper kinda does write a soft acoustic love song about jenny. even tho it’s not directly stated that it’s jenny, the word “techno-witch” is used more than once and there’s a whole verse about big dark eyes. someone in the band finds it in his music folder, tucked under the song he’d been meaning to show them. they all collectively think it’s a really kickass song, somehow convince ripper to play it at one of their gigs, and the scoobies tease ripper MERCILESSLY. xander buys the band’s album on itunes and plays the song whenever jenny walks into a room for, like, weeks. ripper very much regrets writing the song about jenny until he starts noticing how she looks all happy every time she hears it and um. that’s Significant.

5) xander doesn’t Get ripper’s band but they give him a free t-shirt and he wears it around a lot bc he likes looking like he knows what the hip, happening new music is. buffy points out that calling music “hip and happening” isn’t really going to win him many points. xander ignores this.

[phddyke]

Oh my dad did pay me back the other day. I decided I’m not lending him money anymore. He’s still on my last nerve bcuz today he legitimately called my mom—his ex-wife—and like...verbally sadposted to her for like 45 minutes about his sad sack life. On the one hand I’m glad I didn’t have to deal with it but why should she?? His?? Ex ?? Wife???? I know I sound cold but trust me I have every reason to. Rick told me he does this “more often than he should”—yikes. It rly pisses me the fuck off too because he complains about how my mom is this or that all the time when she tries so hard not to say anything about him despite having every reason to. Apparently some woman he was seeing said he was an asshole which is probably true tbh. Like I know he thinks he’s “woqué” but it’s a very lip service type of woke considering he could neither hold down a job nor keep his house clean all the years my parents were married. It really makes my blood boil listen to him complain about my mom or be like “all women are ___” when it’s like hey incase you didn’t know? Without women you’d be dead and/or in the gutter. My mom literally carried your good for nothing, jobless, non-chore-doing ass for TWENTY-FOUR years of marriage, and then let you stay in her house for 14 months after you separated. She paid off your piece of junk car with part of her inheritance and was too decent to ask for it back when you split. And guess how many $0 you saved during that time period? She paid $9,000 for a semester of your school that you told her you needed 48 hours before the deadline because you didn’t fill out FAFSA on time and then you dropped out of that program anyway. You also owe her another $1.5k from your lawyer for the divorce (how embarrassing is that), you were *this* close to demanding ALIMONY and you don’t pay child support lmfao. Your asshole father treats you like dirt like he’s done his whole life and you’re like “but he’s so good to me 🥺🥺” like ok why don’t you borrow money from him instead of me lmfao. You can be a dick to everyone else, why not tell him off instead of cowering and meekly being like “sir yes sir” when he abandons you on Christmas. Since you’re just soooo tough and brave, right? You went through my mom’s stuff in her room when she was kind enough to let you come in her house while it was raining and you were waiting for your son and you still think it’s “extreme” that she wants you to pick us up someplace else, you’re lucky she even talks to you. But it’s your born again Christian abusing selfish miserly bigoted homophobic father who treats you great. Women have held your ungrateful ass afloat your entire 54 year long loser life and you have nothing to say or do but complain about us. Why don’t you see if your brother who banned you from Christmas dinner, stole your identity and owes you $5,000 you’re too chickenshit to ask for for help since men are so great? Of course I can’t tell him any of this since he’ll threaten to kill himself like he did the last time I spoke to him without coddling him (4 years ago) or actually attempt it like he did when I was 14. Fun! Relationships with fathers are just so great ❤️

I feel weirdly guilty complaining about him to my friends so....I guess I’ll just do it here? Anyway my dad is such a fucking pain, it’s literally Christmas Eve and his car is in the shop and he’s “working anyway” so he’s not even bothering to visit. He’s coming a day or two after Christmas but idk for what purpose because he “doesn’t have enough money” to buy my brother and I Christmas presents 🙃 Where that man’s money goes I will truly never know. He’s lived at his fathers house for 3 years and although he might be charging him rent now, he definitely had at least a year and a half rent free. I’m not even sure if he buys his own groceries. I genuinely wonder if he has a secret gambling problem or spends it on women sometimes because I am honestly confounded. Anyway he “doesn’t have money” because he couldn’t plan ahead for something if his life depended on it, and he just got fired for the 20+ job he’s been fired from (no I am not exaggerating here) because his boss had a no politics talk at work rule, and he heard her discussing some crazy pro Trump conspiracy theory with a customer and was like “uhhh I thought it was no politics at work??” Like wow what a genius move sir I’m sure she was immediately like wow I’m so completely in the wrong right now! Why don’t I donate $27 to AOC while I’m at it. Oh and apparently the drawer was $20 short but he “doesn’t believe them” like afjjahkkarj WHAT. The last time the two of us even “hung out” he was picking me up from the train station and charged me $20 for this “favor” for gas and tolls (really), asked me to borrow $100 and informed me I’m not getting Christmas presents. He still owes me the $100—he asks me to borrow money like every 2 weeks—and my brother and I spent $114.82 EACH on him for his Christmas present. I literally make $622.74 a month as a graduate student which frankly should be illegal and I bought presents for EVERYONE. I’m telling him he can’t borrow money anymore and if he doesn’t visit me in Nashville I don’t give a shit, the fact that I even invited him to crash on my couch for a few days just tells me I’m a moron in every way shape and form. I will never learn. And I’ve wanted to complain about this SO MUCH to my mom but it’s really not fair to drag her into it since they’re split. I bet she’s thankful every single day she left this guy. When they divorced he had been fired from 16 jobs (she counted), and here he is getting fired from more jobs, without his own place and with a piece of shit car that shakes so violently whenever he’s on the highway with me it feels like death is imminent. She on the other hand bought her own house, has a regular car that works great, a vintage car for fun (that also works great), a fiancée who’s retired but has enough savings to pull his weight and actually does his share of cleaning the house, and a huge fucking engagement ring. Like talk about a glo up?? And now she doesn’t have to deal with my pos grandfather who literally didn’t give me a birthday, graduation (it was my fucking MASTERS degree), and definitely he isn’t going to give a Christmas present either. And why? Well we didn’t hang out during any of those times bc of COVID which I’m not disagreeing with but if we don’t hang out he won’t give a gift. This dude is also rich af and gives the most sickeningly paltry amounts. Like father like son I guess lmfao my dad didn’t give me a cent for graduation either. Genuinely how did women in past decades not just fucking snap?? Cause I feel close to snapping every goddamn day. I swear if my dad has the nerve to tell me I’m overweight AGAIN when we hang out I’m gonna lose it on him