#me hoping with all my might that classes gets suspended tomorrow

[loving-delusions]

it's storming hard as fuck outside

lightning and thunder are pretty loud too, thats cool

would be a shame if classes got cancelled tomorrow... puts fingers together

[sincerelystranger]

Omg!! I love your new piece, it depicts grief more realistically. Lwj of course cannot be the same and happily forgets 13 years of grief. I can’t wait to read the finished piece. And if your muse strikes, please write a fluffy, funny modern au piece of wangxian to see how lwj’s love changes or deepens or evolves without grief.

Thank you so much, and I’m sorry it took me forever to answer this! First, I want to preface this by saying that I don’t think that there is wangxian for me without grief. I think grief played a pivotal role in LWJ’s feelings towards WWX and if he hadn’t experienced true loss, he probably would have been content to be WWX’s best buddy for the rest of his life lol

That being said, I did write something stupid because I thought it seemed like a good idea in my dream: 

--

Wangji isn’t eavesdropping. 

He isn’t.

His stupid classmates are just talking loudly. He can’t help but to hear them.

He can’t.

A small crowd of boys are gathered around Wei Ying’s desk - because Wei Ying is bright and fun and popular - and Wangji is sitting alone, revising his notes and definitely not paying attention to their conversation, because he doesn’t care. 

He doesn’t. 

“I heard Nie Huaisang from class 2A is gay,” one of the boys says. The other boys around him snicker and elbow each other. 

“You think that’s true?” one of them asks, he shivers dramatically, “I guess I should steer clear of him.” 

The boys all laugh, and Wangji sneaks a peak behind him to see if Wei Ying is laughing as well. He’s relieved to find that he’s not. Wei Ying looks bored, his face in his hands, staring blankly out the window. 

Wangji is relieved that Wei Ying isn’t laughing and he doesn’t know why. But he is. Relieved. 

“The Nie’s are freaking rich though,” another boy says, “I’d totally do him if he let me drive one of his cars - did you see what he rolled up in today!?” 

“Gross,” another boy laughs, “What if he wanted to do you?” 

“Ew, no way!” 

They all laugh again, and Wangji looks back again to make sure Wei Ying isn’t laughing too. He doesn’t quite understand why it’s so important to him, but he feels unspeakably relieved to see that Wei Ying isn’t laughing along with the others. 

Wei Ying stands up suddenly and kicks his chair in. The force knocks the laughing boy off his desk. 

“What do you think Wei Wuxian?” one of the boys asks, still snickering. 

Wangji isn’t eavesdropping. He’s not, he’s not, he’s not. And he doesn’t care what Wei Ying says. He doesn’t. 

“Mm, I think Nie Huaisang is rich and handsome and way more fun than you lot,” Wei Ying says easily, walking towards the door. 

“Wait where are you going?” the boys ask. 

“To talk to Huisang’s brother!” Wei Ying responds brightly, a huge smile on his face. “I’ll let him know that you guys will apologize to Huaisang, okay? Hopefully he goes easy on you.” 

With that he walks out of the classroom, whistling a song that makes the tips of Wangji’s ears go hot. 

The boys dumbly stare at each other, still crowded around a now-empty desk. 

“Wait who’s Huaisang’s brother?” one of them asks. 

“Nie... Nie...”

“Nie Mingjue.” 

There’s a split second of silence before they all start running out of the classroom, falling over themselves comically. 

“Wei Wuxian!” they yell out desperately, limbs flailing in their rush to catch Wei Ying. “Please - we were just! Please! Wei Wuxian!!” 

---

Wangji isn’t waiting for Wei Ying at the gate. 

He’s just standing there to admire the view... of the houses across their school. They’re nice houses. It’s nice to admire them. 

“Lan Zhan!” Wei Ying says, throwing an arm across Wangji’s shoulders. “You ignore me all day at school but here you are, waiting for me! I’m getting mixed signals here, Lan Zhan.” 

Wei Ying laughs delightedly and his breath is warm against Wangji’s cheek. 

“I do not... ignore you,” Wangji says, desperately hoping that Wei Ying thinks that the redness of his ears is from the cold. 

“You totally do,” Wei Ying says, “But it’s okay. I’ll forgive you since you wait for me.” He removes his arm from Wangji’s shoulders and Wangji pretends he doesn’t miss the warmth. 

They start walking, side by side, and Wangji doesn’t count how many times their arms brush together - he doesn’t. 

“Did you really talk to Nie Mingjue?” Wangji asks lightly. Just to make conversation - not because he cares. 

“You heard that?” Wei Ying asks. He sighs and shakes his head. “Idiots - all of them. I can’t wait to graduate this stupid school.” 

They are idiots, but Wangji isn’t in any hurry to graduate. Wei Ying has big dreams. He’ll probably leave their city after they graduate and only come back for holidays and... 

Well, Wangji isn’t in any hurry. He likes walking home with Wei Ying after school. Even if he has to deal with idiots all day. 

“I didn’t talk to Mingjue,” Wei Ying continues, “But they did apologize to Huaisang.” He smacks Wangji on his arm and laughs brightly. “You should have seen Huaisang’s face, Lan Zhan! He was so confused!” 

Wei Ying’s laugh and bright and beautiful and Wangji gives himself a honest moment to admire it. His fingers tingle strangely and he has this sudden desire to press his thumb against the corner of Wei Ying’s lips and... 

“You should be careful,” Wangji says, trying to reign himself back down to reality. “They’re idiots but they can be... cruel.” 

Wangji remembers what those idiots had been like before Wei Ying came to their school. Quiet and shy Wen Ning, whose only defender was his ninety pound older sister and whose only sin was that he was poor and timid. 

Wangji had known what the boys were doing was wrong - and he had told them. But the school administration had done nothing and it was against the rules to fight, so what could Wangji do? 

It was against the rules. 

It was against the rules and Wangji had been content with that until Wei Ying had transferred to their school.

Wei Ying, smart and charismatic and more than ready to break every rule. He had been the bane of Wangji’s existence at first. An annoyance Wangji could not understand. The rules were simple. Why was Wei Ying so eager to break them? 

Wangji didn’t understand - and if he’s honest, he barely understands now. But Wei Ying had taken one look at Wen Ning, had seen Wen Ning being pushed around only one time, and decided enough was enough. 

Wangji can still remember how Wei Ying’s jaw felt in the palm of his hand, as Wangji dabbed medicine on his cheeks and the corner of his lips. Can still remember the way Wei Ying’s fingers felt in his hand as Wangji dabbed ointment on his bloody knuckles. 

“You’ll be suspended,” Wangji had said softly, afraid to say what he really felt. Afraid to admit that he was sorry that he didn’t join Wei Ying in his fight. 

Wei Ying had smiled at Wangji then, and maybe that was the moment Wangji had... 

“Will you miss me, Lan Zhan?” Wei Ying had asked mischievously. 

And Lan Zhan didn’t answer then, because it was against the rules to lie. 

Wei Ying had been suspended, and those idiots had been hospitalized. Wangji had been nervous when they all came back, but maybe it was because those idiots were true idiots, or maybe it was because Wei Ying was handsome and charismatic and undeniable, but after they all came back to school, the idiots began following Wei Ying around like some stupid fan club. 

It surprised Wangji how quickly the opinions of those idiots changed, but he was grateful for it then.

Remembering it now makes a strange nervousness creep up in his stomach. 

If those idiots can change their mind so quickly... Their current good opinion of Wei Ying might... 

“Ehh, what do I care about those idiots. They have fewer brain cells than I have fingers,” Wei Ying says. He knocks his shoulder to Wangji’s. “You worried about me, Lan Zhan?” 

Wangji resolutely looks forward and does not answer because lying is against the rules. 

Wei Ying snickers and knocks his shoulder against Wangji’s again. “We’re not at school, Lan Zhan, you’re not allowed to ignore me.” 

“I do not ignore you,” Wangji answers instead. 

“Then eat lunch with me tomorrow. I’m tired of eating with those idiots.” 

Lunch? With Wei Ying? 

But... 

“They... do not like me,” Wangji says stiltedly, feeling awkward and uncool and everything Wei Ying isn’t. 

“We don’t have to eat with them! We can eat together - just us. Or maybe with Wen Ning too, if I can find him,” Wei Ying says excitedly. 

It really isn’t a good idea and Wangji really should say no. It’s enough that Wei Ying walks with him after school. It’s enough that their houses are close enough together that they can even walk to school together. It’s enough. It’s enough. 

Wei Ying’s reputation might... suffer, if he’s known to be close friends with Wangji... who is uppity and a known rule follower and no fun at all to be with... 

“I use my lunch time to revise my notes,” Wangji says, and it isn’t a lie. He does revise his notes... 

Wei Ying wilts dramatically, puffing his cheeks and pouting his lips like a child. Wangji doesn’t find it at all adorable. He doesn’t. 

They’re almost home now and Wangji has to consciously move his feet so that they don’t slow down. 

They stop in front of the gate to Wangji’s house, Wei Ying turns to face him. 

“Should I open the gate for you, young master?” Wei Ying asks playfully. 

“Boring,” Wangji replies. It’s not cute. It’s not. 

Wei Ying smiles widely up at him and Wangji has to remind his hands to remain at his side. They’re not allowed to grab Wei Ying’s perfect face and bring it close to Wangji’s. They’re not. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying says. 

“Tomorrow,” Wangji nods, trying his best not to sound too eager. 

“Try to revise all your notes today so you can eat lunch with me tomorrow, okay?” 

Wangji turns and opens the gate instead of replying. 

“Try, okay!?” Wei Ying yells after him. 

Wangji walks up the steps to his door and only then does he allow himself to turn and watch Wei Ying walk away. 

Tomorrow. 

He doesn’t plan to eat lunch with Wei Ying tomorrow but... 

But he does revise all of his notes. 

[sweeethinny]

He and Harry had a fight last week... James said he didn’t like him anymore.’’ Ginny looked at her mother, looking a little sadder now. ‘’Harry cried.’ Would you consider writing their fight and then James Sirius apologizing? I was (re)reading this today and I just love it

thank you anon! you can also read it on AO3, if you want :)

the last part, is the content of the letter that james wanted to send to Harry, i hope you liked it! <3  PART 1, i think? idk, but the fanfic that anon referred to

Ginny didn't quite know what was going on when she got home, exhausted from yet another tiring day at work, with sexist coaches who didn't listen to what she had to say in the interviews, and other journalists who didn't care about the ideas she had proposed.

She did not expect to feel so miserable when she agreed to work on the Prophet.

But either way, she was happy that Harry managed to cut the workload that month, spending more time at home with the kids, especially now that James was six and started going to school, Teddy had just gone for Hogwarts, Albus was at a stage where he just wanted to be with his father, and Lily had her teeth born and was in a bad mood.

They hadn't had much of a problem with James at school so far, he had adapted, made friends, done homeworks, and was well controlled with his own magic, occasionally exploding or making things fly.

Nothing too dangerous and that they couldn't fix.

In the last week James' classes were suspended when 7 of the 12 children caught lice, luckily James was not one of them, so the boy seemed a little anxious about the sudden change in routine.

But today it looked like a war had broken out in the middle of their living room. Lily was taking all the clothes out of the clean laundry basket, Albus was on top of the trunk where they kept some old things, with his knee shredded and looking like he was waiting to make a dressing, while Harry and James argued beside him.

Ginny knew that the combination of her and Harry would make children easy to explode, but she realized that James had an extreme facility in getting Harry off track, much more so than Lily or Albus did. Albus knew how to irritate his brothers, and Lily only irritated them with her loud crying and childish antics like throwing things, but James was at that stage where he challenged his parents to find out how far he could go. Teddy had been there, too, but it was with Ginny that he could do it most easily.

However James seemed to know exactly what to do to have an angry Harry.

'James,' Harry asked, eyes closed as if asking for patience, it probably wasn't the first time they had had that conversation.

'I just wanted to fly!' James shouted angrily, his cheeks red.

'And didn't I tell you that you couldn't do that?' Harry countered, running a hand through his hair. 'How many times have I told you that neither you, or Albus, could fly alone?'

'But Albus was there because he wanted to! I didn't tell him to follow me.' The little one looked as furious as his father, his arms crossed in front of the small body just as Ginny did when she argued with someone. 'Why can Lily fly and I can't ?!'

'I was with her, she was not alone, you know that very well. I said that we could fly later, and that I would go with you- ’

'But you worked all day, and then the night would come and we would not be flying! Again!'

'James... You could have hurt Albus! Or hurt yourself.' Harry pointed out, looking as alarmed as if it had actually happened. As far as Ginny could see from the entrance to the Living Room, only Albus was a little hurt, and he didn't even seem to want to cry or anything.

'Oh, of course, if something happens to the precious Albus, it's the end of the world!' James threw his arms up, as if giving up, and before Harry was able to answer him, he shouted; 'I hate you!' And he ran off, tears streaming down his face as he climbed the stairs as fast as he could, his little legs not helping him to be too fast, but Harry didn't follow him either, which helped James get to the room and slam the door.

Harry sighed, hands on his tired face, and Ginny was still a little paralyzed at the door, thinking about what had happened. 'Mum!' Lily shouted, now sitting in the empty clothes basket, making the other two look at her.

'Hello my loves.' Ginny smiled going over to Albus and kissing him on the cheek, realizing how scared he looked. 'Hi my love, how are you?' She preferred to act as if she had just arrived, looking at his grated knee, still a little dirty with grass.

'Fine, I just fell.' He smiled, the little children's teeth a little dirty from what looked like chocolate.

'It'll be okay,' Ginny promised, casting a simple healing charm and placing him on the floor, before of course, she kissed the small scar that remained. Nothing too serious, but it was a tradition that helped them to be less afraid of when they needed to apply potions or other healing spells that were stronger.

They were a Weasley-Potter, after all, they were always falling.

'Hi my other love,' She smiled at Harry, hugging him, but realizing that he seemed a little reluctant to speak. He just smiled awkwardly, kissing her forehead and letting her go to be hugged by Lily, who had managed to topple the basket of clothes to be able to crawl out and run into her mother's arms. 'And my other love.'

'Hi mommy!' Lily cried awkwardly, hugging Ginny back, and hanging from her neck so she could be picked up.

'And where's my other love?' Harry sighed at her question, waving his wand and causing all the clothes to levitate, to be folded, and to go back into the basket.

'Up there,' Harry murmured. 'Do you take care of them? I'm going to prepare dinner.' Ginny nodded, lowering Lily to the sofa when Albus asked her to play with him and the Lego castle he had won from Percy.

‘Mommy, come and play with us!’ Albus asked, seeming not even to remember the fight between his father and brother anymore, amused by the pieces and teaching Lily how to stack the blocks too - even though she seemed willing to just destroy everything.

‘I’m coming, okay? Let me just go and say hi to James, and I'll be back here, okay?’ She promised, crouching in front of them, drawing all the attention to herself. ‘No mess and fights, Mom will be back.’

'Daddy and James fought,' Al whispered, as if it were a secret.

'Bad James,' Lily added, crossing her arms as she could, to look like her brother.

'They are just stressed, and he’s not bad. Now, I'll be right back.' Ginny left the room and went up to the second floor, still listening to the conversations between Albus and Lily, and the sounds of pots and dishes, much louder than usual, and she imagined that Harry was more angry at what he looked like while fighting with James.

Ginny knocked on the door to their eldest son's room, the photo hanging next to her made her smile, a picture of when they went ice skating, a few days before Teddy received the letter from Hogwarts, he and James were smiling from ear to ear. ear, while she and Harry still needed to hold hands to keep steady and not fall.

She hated it when she or Harry lost patience with their kids, when they got carried away by the tantrum. They should have known that the best thing to do when it happened was to just get away, let the kids scream alone for a few minutes, before they came back calmer and managed to talk to them.

'Hi my love,' Ginny murmured, opening the door and entering James's room, it was colder than usual inside, and maybe he had done accidental magic for this to happen and he could be hidden under the covers. 'It's Mommy.'

'I don't want to say anything.' James' voice was muffled by the pillow and the covers, but she could still tell that he was crying.

Ginny sat on the bed next to him, her hand on what she imagined was his shoulder. 'I heard that you and Daddy had a fight, is it true?'

'He hates me.' Ginny smiled sadly, denying and sighing.

'He doesn't hate you my love, and hating someone is a very strong thing to say, I promise you, he is just tired, and you need to help him a little too.'

'But he wasn't going to fly with me, and I just wanted to fly.' James uncoveredlooking at Ginny with brown eyes wet with tears. 'He only cares about Lily and Albus, he doesn't even love me anymore.'

'James, of course not, your father loves you very much, which is why he was concerned that you might get hurt. You know you can't fly alone, it's very dangerous.' She held out her arms for James to crawl onto her lap as if he were still a baby - for her, he always would be - and put him against her chest, cradling her body a little from side to side to calm his crying. 'Dad was just worried that you would get hurt. Besides, you are the older brother, and Lily is still very small and needs help to do a lot of things, just as Albus still needs more help. You are my big boy already, and you have to help them, and not go flying without authorization.’

'But he yelled at me.' James sobbed, holding Ginny's shirt in his hands, hiding his face like he did when he was a kid.

'Look, what Dad did was not right, but you didn't make it easy either. Both are wrong… Dad is having dinner, go take a shower, okay? I promise that tomorrow we can fly together.' James nodded, still glued to his mother, like a sloth clinging to a tree trunk. 'I love you my baby.'

'Me too,' he murmured, without further tears.

[...]

Dinner had been… tense, to say the least. Proving that he was Harry's son, James spent the whole dinner in silence, sullen, without even looking straight up, just as Harry was, determined to eat the lasagna without saying anything.

If it weren't for Albus chattering, and Lily trying to imitate him, they would have eaten entirely in silence.

After all the children were in their beds, sleeping soundly, and the house was quiet for another reason, Ginny lay on their bed, waiting for Harry to get out of the bath. They hadn't talked much, and he didn't even want to go shower with her, so she just waited, sitting on the bed while pretending to read the last pages of the romance Angelina gave her. Of course, the words didn't make much sense in her head, she couldn't concentrate, but she had to hide her nervousness.

When Harry finally got out of the shower, a towel wrapped around his waist, damp, messy hair, and still that sullen look, Ginny couldn't take it anymore; ‘Can you tell me what happened?’

Harry looked at her quickly over his shoulder, before entering their closet and disappearing, still in silence. Ginny can hear the drawers opening and closing, and then she can see Harry coming back from there wearing old shorts that almost didn't stop at his hip anymore. If he wasn't so sullen, she would try to ease the tension he carried on his broad, bare shoulders.

'He and I had a fight.' That was all he said, throwing himself on the bed next to her and covering himself, looking like he was about to go to sleep.

'It's not me you're mad at, don't be an idiot.' Ginny dropped the book on the nightstand, not turning off the lamp beside her, staring at Harry with determination.

He sighed, sitting up too. 'I was taking care of Lily, now that she is coming out of diapers it looks like she wants to pee every minute, and I asked him to keep Albus playing. They were in the garden, and James had already asked me to fly with him, but I was solving ten problems at the same time and making sure our daughter didn't pee on the couch, so I asked him to hope that later on maybe we could fly… But he is your son, after all, and he managed to break the lock on the shed and get a broom.' Ginny shouldn't laugh, she knew that, but she smiled, a little proudly. 'When I went down with Lily, I could only see Albus flying too, unbalanced, not much more than a meter from the ground, and James going up without control. There was no time and Al fell, but I had to make James levitate because the broom was very uncontrolled and he was unable to get it down.’

‘Harry…’

'It was my fault, I know, I shouldn't... I should have put a different lock on or I don't know, and,' He stopped, hiding his face with his hands again, denying. 'And I lost my temper because I had said that he couldn't fly alone, and Albus was crying on the ground and James looked scared when he realized he was too high... I shouldn't have screamed.'

'You were angry,' Ginny reminded him, realizing how sad Harry looked at this. ‘And worried.’

'But I should have known that when I forbidden him, he would try to do exactly what I said not to.'

'He's a child, Harry, of course he's going to do everything we say he can't.' She said what he usually said to her, when Ginny was worried about Teddy at Hogwarts after he spent two weeks without sending letters, even after she asked him to update them every week.

'He said he hates me, Ginny.' Harry finally looked at her, his eyes watering. Again, her heart broke.

‘Oh, Harry, of course not.’ This time, she didn’t wait for him to come to her embrace, as she did with James, Ginny preferred to hug Harry herself. 'He was just nervous.'

'I did everything wrong,' Harry denied, crying even more, as if he had held his emotions up until now, as if just inside their room was a safe place for him to finally let go. 'He didn't say it like it was nothing, I saw Gin, I saw that he was upset, he meant it.'

'He didn't want to, of course not..Look at me, no, no, Harry, look at me...He doesn't hate you, and you didn't do everything wrong, I probably would have done the same thing, you're just tired.' Ginny stared at him, forcing him to look at her too, her hands holding his face, tears streaming down his cheeks. 'You are the best father they could have, the best I could have chosen to be their father, you will see, tomorrow you will be calmer and everything will be fine.'

'I hate to fight with them.' Harry hid his face on her neck, tears wetting Ginny's skin, his hands tightening on her waist as if to make sure she stayed there, with him. ‘I don’t like them to cry because of me.’

'It's the side that nobody tells you about being parents, love.' She laughed softly, trying to calm the mood. 'But he doesn't hate you, I promise you that... I'm sure you are still his hero, and the person he loves the most in this whole world. You are not a bad father.’

[...]

The next morning, Harry got up first, he heard noises downstairs and knew that probably one of the children was already awake and wanting to make a mess. Passing through the rooms just to check, he saw that Albus was still asleep, and that Lily seemed far from waking up, but James' bed was empty, which wasn't too strange, since the boy seemed to still be keeping up with his early morning routine to go to school, even in that week of recess.

He heard footsteps as he approached the kitchen, an owl hooting loudly at the window, and low murmurs. ‘Stay still.’

'James?' Harry watched as his son tried to tie the letter to the animal's leg, which was trying to get away from him. James was on top of a chair, leaning over the counter, trying to pull Pandora’s closer.

‘Dad!’ Pandora flew away with his cry, without the letter, seeming to frustrate the boy.

'What are you doing? Who do you want to send a letter to?’ Harry was careful to move towards James, but he was happy when his son accepted his arms to come down. He still felt guilty.

'Hm... for you.' James looked at the floor, looking embarrassed.

'Me?' Harry knelt in front of him, staying in his line of sight. ‘Why don’t you just give it to me?’

'I thought it would take you longer to wake up.'

'I heard you coming down the stairs,' Harry said, looking into his son's eyes.

'Are you still mad at me?' James asked quietly, holding the letter tightly in his hand.

‘No, my love… I’m sorry for yesterday, I didn’t want to yell at you, I was nervous and I was worried that you might get hurt.’

'I'm sorry for flying without permission, and I didn't want Albus to have followed me for this either, I didn't see him.' James said. Harry felt so bad all night, unable to sleep in peace, conscience weighed down by having yelled at James, thinking about how sad he looked when he said he hated him.

'It was very risky, you could have been seriously injured.' The two looked at each other, Harry pulled his son close to him. ‘I don’t want you to do it again, okay? You can fly, but only with me or mom, never alone.' He whispered against the boy's hair, hugging him tightly, as if that alone could heal the pain he had felt.

'I didn't mean to say that I hated you, either.' James hugged Harry back, looking sly. ‘I don’t hate you.’

'I love you, Jamie. A lot.' He planted a kiss on his son's head, not caring for the tears that seemed to want to appear in the corner of his eyes.

‘Me too, Dad.’

-----

''Dad,

I'm sorry for yelling at you, it wasn't my intention. I don't hate you, I was just nervous, I'm sorry again.

Love you

James.''

[amyscascadingtabs]

the way you keep the world at bay for me

post-the set up, a.k.a jake taking care of hungover amy, hungover amy taking care of sad jake, and mac caring mostly about himself because he’s a baby 😌

read on ao3

Jake doesn't get a lot of sleep that night, and for once, it's not even Mac’s fault. It's not even due to the pizza parlor simulator game either, although he does play a couple of rounds when Amy's finally snoring next to him after ranting to herself about the babysitter’s club for a solid ten minutes, but not even that can fully distract him from the dull sense of doom that's made itself at home deep in his chest. 

This is bad. Holt wants to see him tomorrow, and Jake knows there will be consequences. There has to be. There should be. He made a mistake, and he's going to get punished for it, and there is nothing he can do but accept his defeat. He already knows what he has to do; the nerve-wracking thing is the fact that it's still hours away, and his brain is spinning too fast for sleep.

He really wishes he could talk to Amy. She's sleeping on her stomach with her mouth open, arms straight out to the sides like she’s trying to push him out of bed, but he still can’t be mad at her. He hasn’t seen her this drunk since before she got pregnant, and he’s seriously worried about the hangover she’ll be sporting tomorrow, but he also knows she did it for him. Because they’re a team. Because she trusts him, sometimes even when it turns out he was wrong.

He wrongfully arrested someone. The sentence keeps repeating in his head, appears pasted in bold font on the inside of his eyelids if he tries to go to sleep, and displayed in luminescent letters on the ceiling of his bedroom when he gives up and opens his eyes again. He should have known better, has learned his lesson time and time again since his early days of constantly glorifying his job and letting his impulsivity get the best of him, and he still made a mistake.

  /

He just wants someone to tell him it doesn’t make him a bad person. If only Amy wasn’t so drunk he’s scared to wake her up right now, Charles wasn’t so devotedly biased in all questions involving Jake’s role as a detective, and Mac wasn’t, well… so completely unable to grasp any of the concepts involved in the question.

Amy lets out another mighty drunken snore, and Jake hopes she will consider it a testament to his love for her that he doesn’t voice record it. He turns his head instead and picks up his phone to go back to the pizza game. Maybe just a few more virtual customers will be able to lure him to sleep.

 ~

 He must have fallen asleep eventually, because when Mac does start babbling to himself over the monitor, the morning sun is shining through the windows, and Amy’s stopped snoring. She’s only moaning uncomfortably to herself now, and Jake’s guessing from her strained grimace that the headache has kicked in hard.

“I’ll get you coffee and aspirin as soon as I’ve checked on Mac,” he whispers to her with a kiss to her neck, and he thinks he sees the hint of a smile as she reaches out for him in what’s probably an attempt of a pat on the back, but ends up more of an unintentional slap to his butt. Or maybe she’s still drunk, and it is intentional. It’s hard to tell.

  /

Mac may have no clue about what’s currently going on with Jake, but at least it’s impossible not to smile when he hauls himself up and rocks back and forth on unsteady feet in excitement over the fact that someone’s coming to get him. He greets Jake with that wide grin that shows off all of his four teeth – two up and two down, and they’ve kept everyone up at night for weeks, but they’re so pearly white and cute so maybe it was worth it – and a laugh that’s been Jake’s favorite sound on Earth since the first time he heard it.

“Good morning, bud,” Jake tells his son as he lifts him up in his arms. “What do you say we get you a bottle and mama some coffee? Hmm?”

“Bah,” Mac repeats. Jake decides to give him the benefit of the doubt and say it means he agrees on the bottle.

“Bottle, exactly. You're so smart,” he says, booping his little nose and smiling as it makes Mac giggle. “Let's try another one. Dada.”

There's a tense moment of them both just staring at each other, and then finally, his son goes,

“Bah.”

“One day,” Jake says with a sigh as he carries Mac out of the nursery. “As long as you say me first, okay? We’ll get there. We’ll practice.”

  /

He puts Mac in the high chair while he tries his best to work the coffee machine and the bottle warmer at the same time. It's trickier than to be expected on almost no sleep, but at least he manages to pour the breast milk from the freezer bag into the bottle and not into his coffee this time. He's only made that mistake once (fine, maybe twice, and he kind of liked how sweet it tasted but he's never gonna tell anyone), but he suspects Amy's never gonna let him live it down. He gets Aspirin from the medicine cabinet while he waits, and puts a couple of slices of toast in the toaster. His own day feels already pretty much beyond saving, but at least maybe he can improve Amy's.

  /

Though, when she stumbles out of the bedroom, still in her pajamas with her huge glasses and hair on end and looking like she's either seconds from being sick or going straight back to sleep, he worries whether she might just be beyond saving, too.

“How are you feeling?” He asks as she gives him one drained look before walking up to the couch and face-planting on it with another pained groan.

“I think I might be dead.”

“That's called a hangover, babe. I think you used to be familiar with the concept once upon a time, but I guess it's been a while.” Jake grins at Mac, who only reaches his chubby hands out for the bottle out in response. “Toast?”

“Do I have to?”

“It's going to help.”

“Fine.” Amy pushes her head off the pillow to look at Mac. “He's not drinking the milk I pumped yesterday, right?”

“I poured that out for you. I know they say moderate amounts of alcohol are fine, but, well, you were speaking British.”

“Good call,” Amy mumbles as he puts the coffee, aspirin, and toast down in front of her. “See, this is why I married you.”

Jake just hums, but he does smile to himself as he goes to grab his own cup of coffee.

  /

“I wish I could call in sick to work today,” Amy says between bites of toast, and Jake looks up from where he’s absentmindedly brushing crumbs off the countertop while finishing his own. “My head feels like it’s going to explode.”

“I mean, you did very much go through contractions while managing an entire precinct during a blackout once. You could think about that?”

“No, this is worse than giving birth,” she states confidently, and Jake has to try very hard not to laugh. “Don’t tell my past self I said that. Or my future self if I ever give birth again.”

“Yeah.” He grimaces. “I’m pretty terrified to go, too.”

“Why?”

“Because yesterday? All of it?”

“Ohh.” Amy sighs. “Right. Maybe we should both just stay home.”

  /

Jake’s about to tell her how much he wishes that was an option when Mac drops the finished bottle against the tray, immediately starting to twist in his seat. Jake unclasps the belt and lifts him out before he manages to rock the chair – that kid’s shockingly strong – and Mac immediately crawls away towards the walker. He doesn’t use it to move yet, but he’s been pulling himself up with it for over a month, and the anticipation is high every time he lets go with one hand only to sit back down on his booty the next second. Sometimes Jake could swear his son does it for attention. At least Mac doesn’t seem to have inherited his impulsivity, Jake thinks, and then he’s back to beating himself up in his head.

  / 

“I just don’t know why I did it,” he mutters as he sits down on the floor next to Amy’s head on the couch. She nods slowly, and Jake takes it as a sign she might actually be able to listen to him now. “I should know better, right? These are, like... the kind of mistakes I used to make. I thought I’d gotten better at this kind of stuff. Smarter. Less impulsive. Less of a bad cop. But instead I arrested and tailed an innocent man, all because I thought I had a gut feeling and thought I was being set up.” He shakes his head. “I guess that FBI jerk was right about gut feelings.”

“You’re a great detective,” Amy says without missing a beat. “A lot of the time, your gut feeling is right.”

“That doesn’t excuse it. I still shouldn’t have done it.”

“No.” Amy sighs. “You shouldn’t have.”

“It sucked.”

“Yeah. It did. But there’s nothing you can do to change it now.”

“Do you think I’m a bad person for it?” The question comes flying out of him, and Amy frowns.

“Why would I think that?”

“Because it was a shit move! And because I’m definitely gonna get suspended for it, and that’s going to lose us money. And then we’re not going to be able to save as much for Mac, or pay for his baby music class or baby gymnastics. And then he’s going to end up broke and untalented and it’ll all be my fault, and then you’ll be ashamed of me and leave me and I’ll die sad and alone in a ditch.”

“And you don’t think you’re spiraling just slightly right now?” Amy asks. The smile on her lips is one of amusement, and it humbles him, bringing him out of his cycle of self-pity.

“I don’t know. I didn’t get a ton of sleep last night.”

“I don’t think you’re a bad person,” she says, and that does make him feel a bit better. “I think you made a really stupid mistake. There's no getting away from that. I’m not happy about it. But… I know you'll take responsibility for it. That’s already a whole lot further than a lot of people care to go.”

  /

Her fingers brush through her hair, calming him as she speaks. The hangover has made her voice a little scratchy, Jake notices when she's this close. It reminds him of mornings after long evenings out before they were parents, a time that always feels far longer ago than it was. Sometimes he thinks everything before Mac might as well be another lifetime.

  /

“And we'll work it out if you do get suspended,” Amy continues, talking over the obnoxious melody playing from a toy Mac has found. “It's not great, of course. But we can save lots of money on daycare if you stay home with Mac. That helps.”

“Like a paternity leave,” Jake says. He does like that thought.

“Oh yeah.” Amy laughs. “You’ll be just like one of those hip Scandinavian dads who get to stay home with their kids because they live in countries where they don’t hate people for having kids. And you two can go to all of the cool classes and playdates together. You’d be the sexiest dad at baby swim class for sure.”

“Wouldn’t I also be one of the only ones?”

“Good point. Make sure to mention your wife a lot. But hey, Mac’s going to love it.”

 /

As if wanting to confirm Amy’s point, Mac crawls over to Jake and tries to climb up on his knees to sit in his lap. He does this sometimes when he’s playing on his own; retreats to their arms for a hug or a quick cuddle, only to try and wriggle out of their grip and go back to whatever it is he’s doing in the next moment. Jake thinks it might be one of their son’s sweetest qualities. Mac rests his head against Jake’s chest, almost hugging him like that, and he wonders, not for the first time, how a person that’s not even one year of age can make every other issue in the world seem so insignificant. Even if it's just for a moment, it's a pretty damn good moment.

 / 

Fueled by the most powerful motivation of all – their son’s love and attention – Amy sits down on the floor too, patting her knees.

“You want to come to mama, Mac?”

Mac squirms for a moment in Jake's arms, and Jake lets go of him. Using the couch as support, for a second it looks like he’s almost about to take a step toward her. Both parents gasp in anticipation, and it must confuse him, because he reacts by giving Amy a shocked look and sitting right back down on his butt. Jake laughs as their son crawls away again, heading for the soft building blocks outside the playpen.

“He's such a tease.”

“He gets that from you,” Amy says, and Jake huffs in mock-offense. “Are you sure we shouldn't just stay home from work?”

  /

Jake thinks of his upcoming meeting with Holt. He's been fearing it for so many hours now, and he's starting to wonder if the anxious anticipation might just not be worse than the meeting itself. He already knows what he has to do; the only thing left is to rip off the band-aid.

“I don't think it will make anything better if we don't.”

“Yeah.” Amy sighs, closing her eyes and leaning on his shoulder. “I love you.”

“Love you too. And you should probably shower and put on makeup unless you want everyone to know exactly how hungover you are.”

“I know you're right, and I hate it.”

Jake grins and strokes her hair before getting up from the floor. “I’ll go get Mac ready for the day.”

  /

“Jake?” Amy calls out before he can leave for the nursery with Mac in his arms, and he turns around. Her voice is still a little hoarse.

“Yeah?”

“It's going to be okay, babe. We’ll figure it out.”

 / 

Jake brushes his fingers through Mac’s already unruly curls. He thinks of playground dates, the storytime for toddlers their library holds every Wednesday, and how much time he’ll have to make sure Mac says his name first now. Then he thinks of the bigger image; of daring to set a good example for this child, even when it's hard. If he wants the world to be a better place for his son, he's going to have to start by taking responsibility for his own actions.

“Yeah. I know.”

  /

For the first time that day, he dares to believe it.

[bunnys-beetlejuice-blog]

just full on bodies you with a semi NEW FIC JUST DROPPED BABES

we are leaving cute high school world and entering pain town. this story will have mentions of self harm and suicidal ideation. Please take care of yourselves and don't engage if that sort of content is triggering to you. (be nice to yourselves, i love you)

The worst year of his life starts out the same as so many good days, it almost makes him dizzy to think back on. He feels, later, that a start to this much torment, this painful, should have begun completely fucking miserable, but it had been just any other day. It starts the same way so many days before it starts. His eyes open. He’s in his bedroom, in his bed, like normal. He’s staring up at his black ceiling, wrapped up in his bedspread. His phone buzzes, and he groans, reaches for it, scans messages. A good morning from Barbara, an unread goodnight from Adam, a text from that talent agency that there was something they could use his voice for. He throws back his blankets, rubs sleep from his eyes, and dresses.

In high school his uniform had been an oversized striped hoodie, but for his birthday a few years ago, Charles had bought him several nice dress pants, suit jackets, and collared shirts, and he’d sort of settled into that as his new everyday. He likes how he looks, because this shit is expensive, custom, made to fit his more generous frame, and both his partners always say he looks handsome in a jacket and tie. (Sometimes Barbara yanks him around by the tie. Sometimes Adam snaps his suspenders.) And besides, his dad had taken his preferences into consideration, because all the pieces he’d been gifted had that pattern he was drawn to, thick black and white stripes that absolutely stand out in a crowd. He dresses quickly, throws on his suit jacket over his pinstriped shirt. He adjusts his tie, and gives a grin. Too many teeth, too sharp, and he waves a hand in front of his mouth, and tries again. Human teeth. There we go, B-Man. He lifts his legs, not especially in the mood to walk, and begins to make his way downstairs, for breakfast. He passes by Lydia’s room, and considers harassing his sister, but he remembers how bad he needed his Saturday sleep-ins at fifteen, and takes pity on her, floating past her door silently.

His father, always an early riser, is already in the kitchen, making a pot of coffee, and Betelgeuse lets his feet hit the floor, so that his heeled boots clack against the kitchen tile.

Charles knows the sound, doesn’t even turn around. “Morning, BJ. Any plans for today?”

His relaxed, not exactly actively working lifestyle is not his dad’s favorite, but he’s got a long time, a lot longer than any other person, to work a job. He's just enjoying the time he gets with all his favorite breathers, before he doesn’t have it anymore. At least, that’s always been his excuse. It's not that he can't find work, or that he’s unhirable to a normal job, it’s that he’s trying to enjoy life. Obviously.

But there's good news this morning.

“Got a text from th’ agency. Some voice work,” he grunts. His insanely gravely voice is not always in high demand, but it's been getting some attention lately, mostly because the last commercial he did voice over for, he had to sing, and the request for more of that has been promising. The big goal is some acting gig, on stage, preferably, but he’d take TV, too. He loves the attention, he loves the rush, he loves entertaining. Unfortunately he’s got a demonic aura that makes breathers nervous on principle. He knows if he could just get a break, he’d have a lot to give… but he’s maybe not working on getting that break as hard as he could be.

“Very nice,” Charles finally turns, and smiles, clearly approving. He sets a cup of coffee in front of his son, and BJ glances at it. “Be a pal and wake your mother up?” “This early? On a Saturday?” He squints. “You tryna take me out via Emily attack?” “We’ve got that check up to go to,” Charles says. “I don’t want to be late.”

He shrugs, takes the cup, and vanishes from sight, appearing upstairs, next to his mother. Emily is still wrapped in the bedsheets, snoring lightly, but he knows the trick to rousing her. The coffee cup is waved around her nose, allowing the aroma to hit her senses, and, eyes still closed, she reaches for it. He pulls the cup back.

“Come on, ma,” he scratches gently at her scalp. “Time to get up.” “Coffeeeee,” she groans, reaching at it blindly again, and he grins, and walks backwards, setting the coffee on the dresser, across the room. “Coffee’s over here, Deetzy,” he tells her, and she finally cracks an eye open, and groans. “Evil. Evil son.” “Yup,” he agrees, easily. “Come on. Chuck says you got some appointments to keep.” His mother groans, and kicks back the sheets, before standing.

He’d been twelve, and herself only about thirty when she’d found him, and now, ten years later, at 40, her age is showing, a little. She’s been growing in gray hair for the past few years, and it hasn’t taken over her natural sunshine yellow, but it’s becoming a bit more noticeable, and the slight lines forming around her mouth and eyes are a new addition to her features. Chuck’s aging in much the same way, but with fewer laugh lines. The hair at his father’s temples is going gray, and if he really looks, he can see the beginnings of salt and pepper in his father’s beard. He doesn’t like looking for it, though, and doesn't like the feeling gnawing in his guts at seeing his parents age. If he had his way, they’d stay frozen in time, the way he probably will. Demons don’t age, past a certain point, and he’s pretty sure he’ll be hitting it, soon enough.

He watches his mother shuffle across the floor, and claim her prize of coffee. She takes a long sip, and then groans. “I don’t want to go to the doctor,” she complains to him, and he pats her shoulder. “I know, ma,” he gives her a very sympathetic smile. “But you gotta. Or Chuckles will throw a fit. It’s just a check up, right? No biggie.” She rubs at her temple, and winces. “Getting old sucks,” she tells him. “I’ve been having the worst headaches, recently.”

When they make it back downstairs, Chuck's got breakfast going, and Lydia is sipping her own coffee. Black, like her heart, she always says. He passes her by and ruffles that mop of long blonde hair. “Beetle breath,” she greets him, as he takes a plate from Charles, and sits to eat.

The voice over work isn't as big a deal as he was hoping. He adjusts his tie, fiddles with the collar of his pinstripe dress shirt, and steps out of the booth. “Fuckin’ peanuts,” he complains, and his agent just shrugs. “Gotta start small, BJ. We need someone to do some crooning for this other comercial, some car sale, or something. You feel like playing Sinatra for a bit?”

Not especially, but he does it anyway, and then meets Adam and Barbara for lunch. Adam’s taking classes for business management, and he’s just about done. He wants to take over his grandpa’s hardware store, outside of the city. Way outside, actually, in some little town in Connecticut. They’ve got shared plans, shared dreams, and all of it hinges on this little store in this little town. BJ isn’t too worried. His boyfriend’s hobbies come and go, but Adam really, really enjoys woodworking, and getting to own a place like that sounds like getting to own his own playground.

Barbara, meanwhile, is stuck in clerical work, which she finds mind numbingly dull, but it's a steady paycheck, and it’s afforded her a ticket out of her dad’s place, so that’s something. She and Adam share a tiny studio apartment in Queens, and for all the time Betelgeuse spends there, he might as well live there, too. But three people in a studio isn’t any of their idea of a good time. Speaking of…

“I was on zillow, today,” Adam starts, and he and Barbara lean over with varying degrees of interest, as Adam shows them his phone. It’s a house, predictably, but a nice one. Old fashioned, and a little creeping looking. He likes it.

“She’s a bit of a fixer upper,” he says, admiring the house. “But the price is right, and look at all this character. Classic Queen Anne, with the original crown molding! Tons of space, lots of room for the three of us.” “Maybe a forth,” Barbara smiles brightly, and he matches her enthusiasm. She’s wanted to be a mom since he’s known her, six pretty amazing years, and while a lot has changed in that time, her maternal desire is as strong as ever.

“Maybe a fifth,” BJ grins, wiggling his eyebrows at her, and she flushes. “One from each of my boys.” She agrees, and she reaches across the table, for his hand, which he gives her. Adam takes her other hand, and they’re lost in that fantasy for a moment. He’s not actually sure he can give her what she wants, since he’s not exactly human, but Adam can, at least. And he gets to be part of it. Goddamn, he’s lucky.

“So? Tell us about this commercial you just did!” Adam smiles at him.

“S’not a big deal, just some radio ad,” He tells them, but he’s flattered that they’re always overly enthusiastic about his bit parts. “I heard you on the radio in the office, a few days ago!” Barbara remembers. “My coworkers couldn’t believe that was your real voice! You make such a good villain.” Of course he does. He keeps the smile on, because he knows Babs, knows that she means it in the sweetest, most lovey dovey way possible, but he’s never going to play the hero, because no hero sounds like a demon. He can’t get in his head about this, not right now. Not when the weather’s so nice, and he’s sitting across from the people he loves the most.

“I am the villain, babes,” he grins at her, and stands, leaning over to kiss and rub his stubble into her neck, until laughing, she pushes him away.

“Maybe you should come to the office with me, tomorrow,” Chuck says, over dinner. BJ resists the urge to stab himself through the eye with his fork. “M’not that into real estate, pop,” he tells him, and Emily smiles. “You know BJ’s an artist.” “I just think if he gave it a try,” Charles says, looking to his wife. “That he’d excel at it. I mean, good lord, all real estate is, is making deals and fast talking. He’s built for that sort of thing.” Betelgeuse grimaces. “But then I’d have to spend any amount of time around your coworkers, an’ those other big money creeps.” “Those big money creeps write the checks that paid for this house, BJ,” Chuck reminds him.

“I’ll be sure to send Maxie Dean a fruit basket.”

“Skip the fruit, just send that freak ass a basket of snakes,” Lydia says, and he grins. “Do not do that.” “Psh. Whatever, dad,” he pitches his voice into a teenage whine, and his father gives a dry smile in return. “So, that doctor appointment?” Lydia looks to Emily, and their mother smiles. “Got some scans done, no biggie. Checkups just suck. I’ve been having those migraines, recently, but the doctor didn’t seem to think it was a big deal.”

He’s staring down at his mother, in hospice, and those words echo around his mind. No big deal. The doctor didn’t seem to think it was a big deal. Just a couple migraines. Just some dizziness. Just some nausea. Just a tumor. Just another breather’s life, coming to an end.

Her bedroom is dark. The curtains are drawn. He’s sitting to her left, Lydia dozing to her right, and Emily is sleeping, dozing lightly. Chuck’s talking to the nurse in the hall. The last twelve months are a blur. He can’t remember individual days, can only remember when those test results came back. He remembers, vaguely, holding her hand during treatments. But there’s nothing any breather alive can do about the tumor, about the placement of it. At least she’s at home, at least she’s laying in her own bed. At least she’s not stuck in the hospital. Her sun colored hair is gone. Her smile is gone. That mischievous glint in her eyes is gone. All Emily does is sleep. All they can do is wait. read the rest of this chapter, plus the second one i couldn't help but post, over here, on Ao3! https://archiveofourown.org/works/32243065/chapters/79911316

[saucerfulofsins]

Tried to write a prompt for golf(general) but idk what this is. Absolutely living for your snippets though. Good luck in uni tomorrow!!! ❤️🔥✨

So much of their life now is rushing between, escaping, stolen moments outside of the noise. A suspended breath in the dark garden at a house party inhale, exhale the first few steps on the ice, the swish click of hotel room doors locking out the world . The itch that builds season over season until he wants to scream - wants to grab his hand and run until they aren't anyone, anymore. No expectations. But for now, this - selfies and signatures in the carpark, at the desk, the price to pay for a few hours on the green, closest he can get to nature, to head empty focus, just breathing, here. Nothing cuts like a dive into cold lakewater but it's close as he can find in the city. Being able to share that with pat just makes it all the more precious. Watches him walk up to the green, dorky yellow polo, putter in hand, deep in consideration. Sun breaking through grey skies. He's not gonna solve this one, can taste the shape of it though. Doesn't have an answer for this. No expectations but the space between them. Melting, condensing, expand and retract. Feet together head bowed, focus as he putts. Delicate and direct. Nothing surer than the truth of it, Nothing more dangerous than the hope. Jonny turns away, eyes closed against the sun.

Thank you! Uni was intense but good! All my classes are back in person, and seeing people is weird now? (I’ve basically been entirely on my own for the past year and a half). I really just feel weird with all this ~contact~ I guess. (Don’t worry btw, I only have 3 seminars, and I think the biggest of those is maybe 20 people, I’ve had my jabs and most people around me did too, masks are still a thing, and there’s a ban on coming to class w/symptoms even if they are non-COVID).

Also, I know absolutely NOTHING about golf except that there’s a ball, there’s a stick, and in Dutch “minigolf” is called the 100% worse “midgetgolf.” (I am also very bad at it, from what I remember, give me beer pong any day).

FINALLY. I DO remember asking for fluffy prompts but… I don’t know what happened. I’m sorry fjdfjfjdjkfjg. Can I blame this prompt coming in a little late, please? (seriously though lmk if I should rewrite this as fluff)

-

Although their numbers match seamlessly, their careers, (their bodies, once), Patrick’s never been especially keen on nature. He doesn’t get that same drive Jonny does—he doesn’t need fresh air and open spaces and deep lakes to really clear his head, to feel like he’s living.

They used to talk about this, sometimes. This weird difference, where Patrick feels best in the thick of a crowd, walking in a city street—no matter how hot or how cold the weather. He has his place at Lake Erie, of course, but that was always because of the space, because of the privacy.

Jonny chose his lake cabin for all the other reasons. He wants to sink his feet into the sandy mud, he wants to feel the water lap at his ankles, smell all the different scents—wet algae and pinewood and the thick, soft moss that coats the ground.

He wants to feel sun on his skin, and he wants to clean, grill, eat the food he caught with his own hands.

Over the years, he’s sought that experience in Chicago. He’s never found it, even when all the elements are there—when he doesn’t put enough distance between himself and the city, its glass and asphalt still weigh him down.

Over the years, he’s found the closest he can get is out on a gold course. A good midway point between rink hockey and nature—the manicured lawns are like the temperature-controlled ice, the club and ball equal stick and puck in their semantic purpose. Hold one, hit the other. The mechanics put him at ease, leave him able to do something that feels productive.

More than that, golf is something Patrickenjoys. It must be because he can keep his shoes clean, can keep his expensive watch on. It must be because it reminds him of hockey, too, because Patrick’s never happier than when he has a stick in his hand.

(Jonny isn’t going to think too much about what that means.)

Their friendship continues to change. They used to be closer than they are now, and when they fell out, things were bad for a few years. This, the golf course, is where they learned to be okay with each other’s presence again.

It’s easier to talk when they don’t have to look at each other.

The wide space of the course offers more time, more privacy, than a rink ever could.

Green is a calming colour, the air here is fresher than it is in the city, unfiltered, pure. Jonny can close his eyes and inhale, just stand here for a moment without feeling like the world will slip away from under his feet if he’s not careful.

Patrick’s walking a few metres ahead of him. He’s wearing another eyesore of an outfit, like he’s trying to emulate all the colours that might go into a hockey logo. They are definitely the kind of colours that go into sponsor logos.

Patrick doesn’t need those colours to catch Jonny’s eyes. Jonny’s not sure if he knows that.

He wants to say something but bites his tongue instead. That, too, is easier here. Swallow all those words, all those feelings, and feel them settle in his stomach. They’re heavy, but bearable—full like he is after eating too much of a good meal. He’ll go home later, have a drink, feel the discomfort dissipate the way it always does as he processes this.

His turn. He aligns his putter with the ball, putts, edges past the hole. Patrick whistles, laughs, shakes his head. Jonny tries again, gets it right this time.

Two tries to get it right. It stings; he only ever had one shot with Patrick and promptly blew it. Or maybe they both did, he’s not so sure anymore. It’s been years, and his memories have gone hazy, now, all twisted up with bad dreams and what-ifs.

Patrick’s good at this, takes to golf the way he takes to hockey. Oddly, he doesn’t look smaller out of his gear and skates. If anything, he looks larger. His precision control is visible in each line of his body, and that contrasts against the immediate relaxation after his swing. He’s like an on-off switch, calculated and perfect, and he steals Jonny’s breath each time he does it.

(This is the only moment Jonny still allows himself to watch.)

Patrick grins when Jonny manages another bogey. They’re not really playing against each other, right now, but competition’s in their blood and Jonny’s fallen behind.

There’s nothing malicious in it, either, but Jonny can’t shake the feeling that this is becoming a metaphor for their lives. Patrick, on par with all plans he set out for himself, and Jonny, trying to catch up but eternally falling behind, further and further as he is haunted by the mistakes from his past.

[mcwriting]

The Marriage Project (5)

Happy Halloween! This chapter isn’t spooky, but I hope you still enjoy! If you haven’t read my Halloween one shot from a couple weeks back, go check it out!

Story Masterlist

Word Count: 3727 (a long boi just for y’all)

Warnings: Brief discussion of harassment and injuries, but nothing explicit; some strong language

% Approximately the end of the 1st week of October %

You entered school early the next morning to find everyone chattering in the halls, many of them looking and even pointing as you passed by.

Well that’s… unusual.

You were at your locker when Alexis popped up beside you.

“Did you hear? Tom got kicked out of football practice this morning and he’s suspended! He’s not allowed to play in tomorrow’s game either!”

You slammed the metal door shut.

“What!?”

“Yeah! Something about him beating up some of the other players after school. Serves him right for being such a dick all these years.”

“No it doesn’t. Not this time.”

“What are you talking about, y/n? Aren’t you happy to see his demise? This is the revenge you’ve been waiting for!”

“Alexis, you don’t understand. Tom beat those guys up because they were catcalling me yesterday. He was sticking up for me.” 

You ran a hand through your hair and noticed Harrison and his goons down the hall flexing. “I need to go to the principal. It’s them who should be suspended, not him.”

“Okay, well, do you need me to come with you for moral support? I know how Mrs. Johnson can be,” Alexis offered. 

“No, it’s okay. I’m the one in the middle of this. Just go to class and let me know what other people are saying.”

With that, you headed to the office, shooting a death glare into the bruised faces of Harrison’s laughing crew as you passed by, trying not to make it obvious what you were doing.

When you entered, the secretary looked up at you and smiled.

“Oh, Miss y/l/n. What brings you in here this morning?”

“I really need to talk to Mrs. Johnson, as soon as possible.”

“Oh. Okay then. Is everything alright?”

“No. That’s what I need to talk to her about.”

“Alright then. I’ll go see if she’s available.”

She got up and disappeared for a few minutes, then popped back out.

“She’s okay to see you whenever you’re ready,” she said, sitting back down at her desk.

“Thanks,” you said passively as you stood up and entered the office, shutting the door behind you. You stood still, not sure if you should sit down yet.

“Well, good morning, y/n. What brings you into my office today? Don’t see you in here much,” she smiled, looking back down at a few papers on her desk. 

You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding, tapping a hand on your thigh anxiously.

“What’s wrong, y/n? You look nervous. You have nothing to be afraid of.”

You looked down and then finally spit it out.

“It’s about Tom. He didn’t do anything wrong yesterday after school.”

You sat down in front of the principal as she looked up at you.

“I’m sorry, what? Now, I don’t know what you’ve heard but he started a fight in the parking lot. That’s wrong in my book.”

You looked at your lap, playing with the plastic ring you’d continued to wear since late August.

“He only did it because the other guys were harassing me yesterday. They were catcalling and whistling and he was trying to stick up for me. It’s the other guys that should be in trouble, not him.”

“Are you sure you’re not just saying that to protect him? I know you two are friends.”

“With all due respect, Mrs. Johnson, we have always been enemies. We may seem like friends because of that marriage project thing but… I would never lie about any harassment for Tom Holland or anyone else. If those three guys had gone after me… I mean, I’m strong, but, I’m not that strong. I’m thankful for what Tom did for me, and I know he’d do it again for any woman.”

Mrs. Johnson looked at you for a few moments, then nodded her head.

“Okay, well. I’ll have a chat with Tom and the other boys and see what I can do. Thank you for being willing to come to me. Is there anything else you want to talk to me about?”

“No, no. It’s okay. I’ve dealt with this before and probably will again. I just really needed you to know that Tom doesn’t deserve to be in trouble while the others are walking around free.”

She nodded. 

“Like I said, thank you for letting me know, and I’ll see what I can do.”

You got up to leave. Your hand was on the doorknob when she said one last thing.

“You know, I wish I was more like you. The same thing used to happen to me when I was your age. I’m glad you actually had the guts to say something about it.”

You parted your lips to speak, but instead gave a tight-lipped smile and a quick nod. With that, you were out the door.

%

You sat in honors english next to Alexis, a pit in your stomach.

People kept looking at you, which was weird, but you figured it was because Tom wasn’t there for you to have typical banter.

You worried about Tom a lot, and hoped that Mrs. Johnson’s parting words meant she really cared about what you said. You decided to shoot him a text.

Hey. Idk if you’ve heard anything, but I went and told Mrs. Johnson that you were just trying to stick up for me, and mentioned that we’re enemies or whatever. She was gonna look into the other guys getting in trouble. Sorry.

By the time lunch rolled around, you were getting tired of the eyes on you. Usually you loved the attention, but something about it felt different today.

“What is everyone’s problem?” you finally asked Alexis and the rest of your friend group before biting into a carrot. “It’s like they’re all looking at me more than the normal amount.”

“Well… it’s probably because they are,” one friend said.

“And why is that? Like duh Tom’s not here. Big whoop. We’ve both missed school before.”

Alexis looked at you sheepishly.

“Lex, what are you not telling me?” you interrogated.

“Welllll… it might have something to do with someone spilling that Tom and you were seen hugging last night after your game, and now Harrison is using it to say Tom beat him up because he loves you or something.”

“I swear I’m going to kill that bitch ass.” you replied back, looking around the room. 

After a quick scan, it’s obvious that he and the other guys aren’t there. A sly smile rose to your face. 

Maybe Mrs. Johnson was on your side after all, and hopefully she’d see past any lies Harrison might tell her.

%

Tom was sitting in Mrs. Johnson’s office, flanked by his parents.

“Miss y/l/n explained to me that the boys you got in a fight with were harassing her. Is this true?”

“Yes, ma’am. I sat there and watched it happen and didn’t didn’t do anything about it, but then she called me out and I realized how disgusting it was, what they did.”

“Hm. And you found the best course of action to be punching Mr. Osterfield instead of coming to the administration?”

“I know what I did was wrong, but I didn’t want to tell her story for her. If she wanted to come out and say what happened then that’s her choice, but I couldn’t sit back and let them get away with it. I feel that it’s my responsibility to keep both my teammates and fellow men accountable.”

The principal looked at Tom for a few moments as she contemplated.

“Well, she came to me this morning and asked that I review your suspension. I also talked to the other boys and they admitted to saying a few graphic things to her. I just need to ask you one more thing: if this had happened to any other girl, would you have still gone after those boys?”

“In a heartbeat, Mrs. Johnson. I just think of what would happen if it were my mom, or a relative, or my future wife. No woman deserves to be treated that way.”

She nodded slowly, then shuffled some papers on her desk.

“Well, Tom. What you did was wrong, but I can tell that you know that. I’ll also say that you were doing it for a noble cause. It takes a lot to go up against three athletes and you didn’t come out unscathed. Since this is your only offense, I’m ending your suspension after today. You may go back to class tomorrow and play in the football game, but this suspension is staying on your record for now. If you don’t get into any more trouble by the end of the semester, I’ll take it off and you’ll be put back into the running for valedictorian.”

“Thank you! Thank you so, so much, Mrs. Johnson, you won’t regret it.”

She chuckled at his earnestness.

“Yes, well. You’re a good kid, Tom,” she looked to his parents. “And you two have raised an incredible young man. I’m pretty sure if there had been more people like Tom and y/n in my high school, the world would be a much better place.”

With that, they stood, exchanging gratitude and handshakes. 

Dom and Nikki slung an arm over their son’s shoulders as they walked back to the parking lot, proud of the son they’d raised.

%

You were laying on your bed after dinner scrolling through social media when your phone began to ring. 

It was Tom.

You quickly picked up and placed the phone to your ear.

“Tom!?”

“Hey, y/n.”

“Oh my gosh! I tried to text you earlier but I figured your phone got taken away or something. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good. And yes, I was grounded from my phone.”

“You say ‘was’ as though something has changed.”

“Well… Mrs. Johnson reversed my suspension,” he began.

“That's amazing!”

“I know, but she’s keeping it on my record until December. She said she’ll take it off if I can stay out of trouble but until then, I can’t be considered for valedictorian.”

“WhatI!” you exclaimed into the phone, shooting up to a sitting position.

“What’s wrong? Aren’t you happy about that?”

“No! Now I’ll have no one to compete with! We all know you and I are miles ahead of everyone else, so without you, I’ll have precisely zero motivation!”

Tom laughed at your self concern while you twisted your star ring.

“Well I’m glad you were worried about me. I’m getting to play in the game tomorrow too.”

“That’s great. You’ll have to dedicate your win to me.”

“That depends on if we win, but seriously, thank you. If it weren’t for you I’d probably be in way more trouble.”

“About that… why didn’t you tell her what actually happened this morning? This probably could have been avoided,” you suggest.

“I didn’t want to come forward for you without your permission. It happened so fast that I was willing to just take the fall instead of dragging you into it. It obviously worked out in the end, anyways. The other guys got suspended for most of next week and can’t play in the next two games.”

“Woah. Johnson was serious. Hopefully that’ll teach them some consequences of not respecting women. Will your hand be okay, though? It looked pretty beat up yesterday.”

“Well thankfully I punch with the left and throw with the right, so I should be good there. I’m mostly just worried about everyone seeing my ugly bruised face.”

“It can’t be that bad. Plus, if anyone tries to give you shit about it just remind them where you got it. Not many people can say they took down three football players with just their fists.”

He laughed again.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. I guess so. Anyways, I just wanted to call to tell you the news and thank you. See you tomorrow?”

“Sounds good, champ. We both need to rest up for our big days.”

“Champ? Is that my new nickname?” he questioned.

“Hm. We’ll see how it feels when I’m saying it to your face.”

“Alright, princess. Goodnight.”

You felt a flutter in your stomach.

“Night, Tom.”

%

The talk of the school on Friday was how Tom was back and Harrison’s posse was gone.

And everyone knew you had something to do with it.

You were popular and friends with a lot of people, but unless you were super close, they were usually pretty intimidated by you. Because of this, very few students came to ask you about what was going on.

Different rumors floated around all day, some saying that you and Tom were secretly dating, others claiming that you and Harrison were the ones dating, or that you were stuck in a love triangle with the two.

It was exhausting.

In home ec, the class was baking cinnamon rolls when Mrs. Flynn got everyone’s attention.

“Okay, class! I just wanted to ask if there were any couples wanting to get ‘divorced’? I want to figure out how to redistribute over the weekend for those that do.”

Three couples raised their hands and Mrs. Flynn wrote them down.

“Is there anyone else?” she scanned the room, stopping when her eyes met Tom. She looked between the both of you and raised her eyebrows.

You and Tom looked at each other, smiled, then back at her. You both shook your heads no. She pursed her lips, then grinned back.

“Alrighty then. Speak now or forever hold your peace!”

%

Your volleyball game that afternoon was a quick win, so you had plenty of time to shower and change before the football game that night.

There was a nip in the air now that it was the beginning of October, so you’d wiggled into some jeans and put on a long sleeved volleyball shirt. Your hair was pulled into two loose french braids that fell down your shoulders.

Your friends, having nothing to do while you got ready, had decided to go to the field early to do some “boy scouting” as they liked to call it, so you found them on the front row of the student section staring at the other teams' asses in their football pants.

Caroline and Alexis were talking about their own marriage project stuff when you sat down, waving to all of your friends.

“There you are! Did you eat dinner?” Alexis asked with concern.

“Hold on,” you reached into your bag and pulled out a sandwich from your favorite shop, unwrapping it and taking a big bite before continuing. “How’s it looking out there?”

Caroline leaned forward to talk to you.

“Numbers 11 and 28 are the cutest but it doesn't look like they’ll make it off the bench tonight,” she commented.

“Ugh. It always ends up that way, doesn’t it?”

You all talked some more as students filed in and the bleachers filled up.

You saw the team captains go to do the coin toss and watched Tom, who had tape around his left hand. 

As they came back to the bench, Tom noticed you and pointed his helmet towards you. He fished his necklace from his jersey to show you, then stuffed it back in before putting his helmet on.

You hadn’t really understood what he was trying to say, but assumed it was something about dedicating the game to you, so you just tossed a thumbs up at him and went back to your conversation.

The team had a long, rough game, but pulled out another win by just a field goal once again. You were headed to the parking lot when you heard a male voice yelling your name. 

You stopped to see it was Tom coming after you while the other girls went ahead to their vehicles.

Tom was covered in sweat and when he reached you was out of breath. His cheek had swollen up again and his bruises were apparent under the streetlights. 

“Hey. I parked by you so I figured we could walk together since my parents took the boys home.”

“Okay, I guess. Good game by the way. Your hand didn’t seem to stop you.”

“Thanks. It’s definitely hurting now. I’m just glad I’m not the reason we played poorly. Our defense is in major need of work, with and without our three missing players.”

“I could definitely tell. It must feel nice though, to win without them.”

“You have no idea. And yes, I dedicate this win to you,” he joked.

“As you should,” you fired back as you reached your car. “See you tomorrow?”

“Yep. I’ll try not to sleep through my alarm this time.”

%

Tom slept through his alarm.

Dom had let you in and mentioned that he thought he’d heard Tom rustling around upstairs, so you sat at the dining room table and did homework while waiting.

That morning, your friends and you had decided to go for a nice brunch, so for once you were dressed up nice, wearing a muted pink corduroy skirt and a flowy white v-neck. You had re-braided your hair into two loose french braids and wore some light makeup.

As you were working Nikki walked in.

“Oh my goodness. Stay right there, the lighting is perfect for some pictures.”

She ran out of the room and eventually came back with a camera and some light reflecting boards. As she was setting up the tripod, she started talking to you.

“You know, I’ve been wanting to do a photoshoot like this for a while. I haven’t done a real sit down shoot since I’ve been taking pictures at football games, and you’re the perfect subject.”

She directed you to pose certain ways, mostly trying to get candid pictures while you worked, but took some smiling portraits as well. After a little while, Tom appeared in the room with some coffee, his face still dark but somewhat better. 

“What are you guys doing in here?”

“Oh I’m just shooting y/n. I’m almost done. Why don’t you go sit down next to her and look like you’re working together.”

He rolled his eyes, used to his mother’s antics. He couldn’t blame her, it was her profession, after all.

“Do you really want me in pictures looking like this?” 

She looked up at him, remembering that he still looked pretty beat up. 

“Hold on, I can fix that,” she claimed, getting up. She returned with some foundation and concealer. He sat mostly still as she lightly applied it, wincing some when she dabbed her sponge over the darkest bruise. 

He took the seat next to you once she was done and Nikki told you to pose as though you were working together. She also got a few shots of you both looking seriously at the camera, then smiling.

At one point, Tom made a joking remark that caused you both to look at each other and laugh. You pretended not to notice the shutter click and flash light up.

After seemingly the hundredth picture of you and Tom together, he got fed up.

“Can we please be done now, mom. We need to work on our project.”

“Yes! Sorry, sorry. I was so deep into the zone that I forgot. You two were just being so cute.”

You felt yourself blush as Tom stood up.

“Okay, mom. We’re gonna go upstairs…” he blurted.

You gathered everything and followed him, almost running into Paddy when you reached the top of the stairs.

“Wow… y/n. You look so pretty,” he said quietly, blushing. You grinned sweetly.

“Thank you, Paddy. That’s very kind.”

“Don’t you agree, Tom? Don’t you think she looks pretty, too?” Paddy asked his older brother, who looked tense.

“Yes, Patrick. She looks very nice today. Now bug off, we need to work on our project,” he muttered. 

As you passed by, you thanked Paddy once more, amused at his middle school crush on you.

When you got to Tom’s room, you set down your stuff and pulled out a pair of leggings.

“I’m gonna go change real quick. You know my computer password by now so you can pull up the budget. I also have some makeup wipes in that pocket if you want them.”

When you came back, Tom was standing, rummaging around his desk. His face was also clean of the makeup.

“What are you doing?”

“Oh, you’re back. I was looking for that paper Flynn gave us Monday. I set it up here somewhere.”

You stuffed your skirt into your backpack and sat by your computer to see what he had done so far. He let out a soft “aha!” 

He opened up a drawer and dug around in it too.

“Wanna kiss?” he asked dismissively.

“Excuse me?”

He turned around, holding something silver in his hand. 

“A Hershey’s kiss. Get your mind out of the gutter.”  

He tossed you a chocolate and you rolled your eyes unwrapping it.

“It’s kind of hard to get what you mean without context.”

You popped it into your mouth as he uncased his, sitting back down.

“I keep a bunch of candies and stuff in that drawer so my brothers can’t steal them. Don’t tell any of them.”

“Deal, as long as you’ll get me another one.”

%

As you were leaving that afternoon, Nikki stopped you in the doorway.

“Oh, y/n, I’m glad I caught you. I was wanting to ask, have you’ve gotten senior pictures done yet?”

“No, but I’ve been wanting to get volleyball ones done soon while the leaves are changing color.”

“Oh perfect. I was planning on taking Tom to do his football pictures next Sunday if you’d like to join us. I’ll do them for free if you’re okay with me putting them on my website.”

“Absolutely! Where are you planning on going and I can just meet you there,” you agreed, happy to have that weight off your shoulders.

“Well my parents have this lake house about an hour away and Tom really wanted to get some shots around the dock and woods. Would that be alright with you? You could just come here and I’ll drive us out. It would just be the three of us.”

“That sounds perfect, Nikki. We can figure out details next Saturday?”

“Absolutely. See you next weekend, dear.”

%

A/N: Fun fact, the “wanna kiss” scene is what actually caused me to make this entire story! The idea popped into my head and I couldn’t stop thinking about it and somehow it turned into this. So yeah! Have a great week!

Pls message or send an ask to be added to the permanent or story tag list!

Tag List: @jackiehollanderr, @one-big-fangirl, @l0lmk, @primadonnasdream, @bookworm06, @thenoddingbunny-blog, @agentnataliahofferson, @spider-babe,

[ultraintrovertedgryffindor]

Just Like You - Kenny McCormick(South Park)

I wrote this a really long time ago when I was obsessed with South Park. I don’t know why lmao, but here it is. 

Warning: Also wrote this when I was an edgy teen™, so cringe and possible trigger warning.

~~~~~~~~~~

Welp, today’s the day...

New town. New house. New school.

My parents had gotten a better job offer here in this little town of South Park, much to my dismay. I love traveling, but moving from a large city in New York to a small mountain town in Colorado is a lot.

It should be interesting though, more opportunities that I’ve never gotten before. Although, I still have to go to school. The local South Park high school.

I put on my outfit for school and wear my black coat over it. It seems to always snow here, only on rare occasions it gets warm. I run downstairs and grab a piece of toast my mother made from the kitchen. I find a note on the counter.

Have a good first day of school, hon. Try to make some friends, and yes, that means being nice to people. Your father and I will not be back until tomorrow morning, so keep those memories of your first day in you head until we can hear about it. Love you!

My mother is a freak, I love her, but she’s a freak. I’m surprised my father has a job with all the day drinking he does. It helps him get work done, I guess.

I walk to school still eating my buttered toast. Approaching the school, I take in its features. It’s an ugly yellow color. Although, I think all bright colors are ugly. I walk in the school and all eyes are on me. I pretend not to notice. I get my class schedule and such from the receptionist and make my way towards my locker.

“You must be new. I think I would’ve recognized an ass that fine before.” A brunette says to me. I roll my eyes and huff.

“As a matter of fact, I am new. I was hoping for something better than a lame catcall on my first day, but at least you tried.” I said and patted him on the shoulder. He glared, tears filling in his eyes, and stomped off.

I bet he’s never been rejected in his entire life, poor soul.

I walk into my first class and immediately get called on. “Well, hello there! You must be the new student. Y/N right? Well, I’m Mr. Garrison and this here is my little friend Mr. Hat. Say hello Mr. Hat!”

Okay...already creeped the fuck out. Something about his southern accent and oh yeah, his fucking creepy ass puppet just rubs me the wrong way.

“Now, please, go take a seat. Wait...are you a troublemaker?” He asks.

“Oh no. Not at all, sir.” I lie. It’s easy to lie. I have a natural talent for it.

“Oh alright, I guess you can sit next to Kenny. That boy in the orange coat. You can keep him in check.”

Will do, you creepy old fuck.

I take my seat next to the blonde haired boy. He’s kinda cute actually. After class a group of boys came up to me, including that Kenny kid.

“Hi, new kid! Just thought we’d introduce ourselves. I’m Kyle. This here’s Stan, Cartman, and Kenny.” The redhead said.

“Holy shit, look at those tits!”

“Cartman!” Kyle scolded.

“Well, first off. It’s Y/N, not new kid. And nice to meet you too...I guess.” I said and walked off. 

Yeah, I don’t have great people skills. My harshness has pushed people away. I’m trying to work on it. But determined from what the fatass said I probably don’t wanna be friends with those dudes.

Off to lunch, finally. Hopefully the lunch here is better than the ones at my old school. I took my tray and looked around the lunchroom. Everyone in groups or pairs. I see one empty table. I head towards it and sit down.

The food isn’t that bad, but I’ll definitely be bringing my own from now on. While I was eating I noticed people staring at me. One, that Kenny kid, and two, that guy that used that lame catcall. I got uncomfortable real quick.

The rest of school was a bust. It was boring. Now, I want something fun to do. I heard that there’s a pond near here, that sounds like fun. I asked directions to where the pond was, which I found out was called Stark’s Pond, and headed there.

I approached and noticed no one was there. Perfect.

I looked around in my bookbag for some rope, and luckily I carry some around with me at all times. I look a heavy looking rock and tie it to the rope. I’m not that heavy so it should work.

I tie the other end of the rope around my ankle. I throw the boulder into the pond and it yanks me down, breaking my ankle. It drags me down until the rock rests at the bottom of the pond.

It’s dark and cold. I’m floating, suspended in time. I look up and see the sunlight breaking through the surface of the water, but it’s not enough to reach me. My hair flies around, loose and tangling each other. I reach up and run my fingers through my soft hair.

It starts...I try to gasp for breath but it isn’t there. My lungs start to burn with fire as no oxygen reaches them and they only fill with water as I struggle for air.

I always find this part of drowning so fascinating. Your survival instincts kick in and you try so desperately to fight to survive but come up short when your lungs fill completely with water and your body becomes stiff and frozen.

I black out.

*The Next Morning*

I gasp and bolt upright from my bed.

I sigh in relief to see that I’m back again, in my new home. Every time I die, there’s always a part of me that’s afraid I’ll never come back, and yet I always do.

The first time it happened, I was 10. I was at a birthday party. It was my friend’s party cake that killed me. Someone, while making the cake, accidentally put poison in it. I don’t know how in the hell someone “accidentally” puts poison in a cake, but it happened.

I started to feel hungry, it wasn’t time eat yet but the cake was on the kitchen table and I couldn’t help myself. I took a small piece of cake, it was delicious but it caused me to foam out the mouth and have a seizure. I died almost instantly. Good thing I died otherwise the rest of those kids would’ve had a bad day.

Then I woke up in my bed the next morning.

The hardest part was that no one remembered that I died, but I did. I remember the whole painful experience, and my parents didn’t even believe me. They took me to counseling after that, not that it helped.

One day, a few weeks after the first time I died, I tried crossing the road without my parents. I looked both ways and no cars were coming as far as I could tell. As soon as I almost crossed the, a car came out of no where and completely wrecked me. Again, I woke up in my bed like nothing happened.

The day after I built up the courage enough to test out the theory that I was unkillable. My dad had a 9 mil in his safe. I shot myself, and just like that, I woke up in my bed the next day.

At first, I was insanely afraid of myself and it wasn’t until last year that I realized it could be fun.

I’ve tested out so many ways of dying. Yesterday at the pond was my first time drowning, but I wanted to get over it cause I knew I’d drown soon even if I avoided it. Next on my list is falling to my death, but besides drowning heights is my biggest fear. Heights might be a good excuse to procrastinate getting that done.

I get up out of bed and take a quick shower. I wonder if I’ll ever stop being immortal? It’s probably a good thing I am since I’ve become so accident prone.

After my shower, I quickly got dressed and jogged down the stairs, almost falling in the process. I walked into the kitchen where I saw my parents.

“Y/N! Hello, sweetie!” My mom said and gave me a hug.

“Hey.” I said.

My mom was making waffles and my dad was just sitting at the kitchen table drinking coffee and reading the newspaper. Dick never pays any attention to me.

“So, how was your first day of school? Did you make any friends?”

“Uh, not really. Some guys introduced themselves to me, but you know how I am with people. And school was fine, learned a lot, teachers are a freaky though.” I paused. “Oh, and I drowned myself at Stark’s Pond.” I said nonchalantly.

My mom sighed. “That’s nice dear.”

Ever since I’ve been experimenting with dying over and over, I’ve been telling my parents about it. They never believe me of course. Even when one time I purposely hurt myself and bled to death in front of them, but they never remember. My dad didn’t really give a shit though. Anyway...

“I’m going to school now. Later!” I said, walking out the door.

Hmm, maybe I should take the bus. I wait at the bus stop, cause I don’t feel like walking to school.

“Y/N!” I flinch when I heard my name being called out. I turn to see Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and Cartman walking up to me. “I didn’t know you took the bus.” Kyle went on to say.

“Didn’t really feel like walking to school today.” I said, looking down and kicking the ground beneath me absentmindedly.

The bus finally arrived and we all walked on, I sat in the very back by myself. Until Kenny decided to sit next to me.

“Mmph!” He said, well I don’t exactly know he said. His bright orange parka covering his face made his voice muffled. I’m just gonna assume he said hi.

“Hi.” I replied.

“Mmph mmph mmph mph mmmph mmph!”

“Uh...huh?”

He rolled his eyes and took off his hood, revealing a mop of messy dirty blonde hair. “I said, how are you liking school so far?” He said.

“Oh, um. It’s okay, I guess.” I smiled.

“You guess? Okay, so I take it you don’t really like it.”

“Well, it always sucks when you’re the new kid and you have no friends.” I sighed.

“No friends, huh? Well, I’ll be you friend. I’m sure Kyle and Stan will too!” He said, making me blush. Darn. “Aw, you’re blushing!”

“Shut up. I always blush.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Kenny smirked.

When we finally got to school Kenny walked me to class, which was nice. He’s actually really nice and funny, also really adorable.

*A Week Later*

School so far has been good. I’ve grown really close to Kenny, since he’s basically my only friend. 

Kenny invited me to sit with him at his table, I agreed. Stan and Kyle seemed to enjoy my company though, Cartman didn’t. Didn’t like me for some reason, although he could be just an asshole all the time.

As the talk started to slow down and lunch was almost over, I looked around the lunchroom to avoid small talk. I saw the guy with brown hair staring at me again, but looked away when I saw him. “Hey, Kenny?”

“Yeah?”

“Who is that guy over there?” I ask, discreetly pointing at him.

“Oh, that guy in the red coat is Clyde. Why?” Kenny asked.

“Oh, no reason. He was just staring at me my first day here and also today. He also kinda catcalled me that day too.”

Kenny noticeably frowned. “He has?”

“Yeah, but it’s probably nothing.” I stuttered a little. Kenny giggled. 

“You’re cute when you stutter.” He smiled, which made me blush. “Aw, you’re blushing again.” He poked my blushing cheeks.

“Ugh, stop.” I whined, and shoved his hand away.

The rest of school was okay. Kenny stayed by my side the whole day, I didn’t mind, but he seemed like he was in a clingy mood which was weird. “I’ll walk you home.” Kenny said.

“Oh, no, you don’t have to do that.” I said.

“Nah, I insist.” He said.

Well, who could say no to Kenny. We were almost to my house, we had to cross the street first. We both walked side by side, Kenny had his arm around my shoulders to which I giggled. I suddenly hear a loud horn, I tried to push Kenny out of harm’s way but it was too late.

We’d both been run over by a semi-truck. 

I gasp and bolt upright from my bed in a cold sweat.

Oh, god. Kenny. We both got hit. I tried to get Kenny out of the way, but I was too late. I let him get run over. He’s probably dead because of me.

I start to sob. He’s dead and it’s my fault. My fucking fault. God no. Why couldn’t it have just been me? I wouldn’t even care if I wasn’t able to come back, I just want Kenny to still be alive.

My alarm went off. I smashed it. I’m not going to school today. I can’t. Everyone probably knows Kenny’s dead and they’re mourning him school. I can’t be knowing it’s my fault.

My doorbell rings.

Ugh...I don’t feel answering the door. The person is now beating on the door, damn they’re persistent.

I get up to yell at the person who’s beating down my door. I mumble profanities as I answer it. My heart stops. Not literally but it feels like it. 

“K-Kenny?” I start sobbing as I take the blonde haired boy in my arms, holding tightly. “I thought you died!” I sob. I pull away. His face looks like he’s in shock, also confused.

“You...you remember?” He asks.

“Of course I do! I tried pushing you out of the way of that truck, I guess I succeeded.” I sigh in relief.

“But...how? I thought you died too.” He said, flabbergasted.

“What do you mean too? Wait, you remembered I died?” I ask, also so confused.

“Y/N, I died. You didn’t push me out of the way in time, but I didn’t save you either. We both died,” he paused, “and we both remember.”

Suddenly, Kenny grabs both my upper arms and pulls me close to him and gives me a passionate kiss. 

I pull away, shocked. “Woah....what was that for?”

“I’m sorry. It’s just...nobody has ever remembered me dying. No one, but you can.” Kenny explained.

“And you remember me dying?” I ask.

Kenny nods. “You’re the first person that remembers me dying too.” He says.

I don’t know what to say or do. This has never happened to me before. I think Kenny feels the same, since we’re both just stood awkwardly at my front door. I finally break the silence.

“Kenny, I thought you died, and I’ve never been more scared in my entire life.” I said, with still a few salty tears flowing down my red cheeks.

“I was too.” Kenny said. “Well, looks like we have more in common than I originally thought.” He giggled.

~~~~~~~~~~

[sooibian]

Little Miss Byun

Pairing: Baekhyun x Little Miss Byun x OC / Reader

Genre: Fluff, slice of life

Description: Miss Byun is not so little anymore and dad!Baek is trying to do his best to...adapt.

Word count: ~1.5k

A/N: I’ve poured whatever little energy I have left these days into this one-shot. I hope you enjoy! Also, I might actually edit this sometime later.

Tagging: @littleflowercrown13​ probably not the Miss Byun you were looking for but I hope you like it <3333

Moodboard credits @is-that-baekhyuns-shirt

***

Her blonde hair is neatly pulled into a sleek ponytail but the untamed loose strands remind Baekhyun of the unruly black curls that once framed her cherubic face. Prim and ladylike, she is, in the way she chews her food - daintily with her mouth closed. In these moments he often craves a glimpse of caricaturesque chipmunk cheeks in her well defined jawline. 

Endearing as it may be, he shouldn’t have called her by her nickname - Chipmunk - in front of those little pixies considering how self-conscious she’d always been about her rather large front teeth. He wouldn’t have done it in a million years, if only he’d had an inkling of their presence in her room when he barged in with a generous tub of berries and cream, her all-time favourite. Which he later ended up sharing with you, as she dismissed his second proposition with “I am on a diet..I think you should finish it before it goes bad”. He had never liked those girls because of the way they made his little princess feel - imperfect. To him she’d always be the most beautiful girl in the world - sculpted by the Gods themselves. 

She hadn’t been her usual chipper self since that day, and the gravity of his mistake has been eating away at Baekhyun. His desperate attempts to make her laugh again have been suspended temporarily, all thanks to your wise counsel ‘give her some space, she’s not a kid anymore’. Like a reprimanded child, he muttered unpleasantries at your back. You reckoned your older one needed some space, too.

***

You kick him under the table. 

He’s been observing her earnestly over his thin metal rimmed spectacles for quite sometime now but she has been far too busy with the abc’s and x’s and o’s on her cell-phone, to even take notice. Each chime berates your husband, pushes him closer to the edge of patience, until he can no longer tolerate being on the receiving end of his Universe’s silent treatment. After the last five days of resilience, the glint of combat is in his eyes. “Jagi”, he says to you, his gaze fixed on the rectangular device that mocks him from the possessive clutches of his daughter’s slender fingers, “I don’t see any samgyeopsal on the table.” The man of the house was usually quite loud, but tricked by the low rumble, you realise his tactics too late for damage control. He’s warming up for showdown and it causes your little one to sit up and take notice.

“Hmm?” Wide-eyed, she breaks out of the obsessive spell the five and a half inch screen has put her under. She’s unperturbed though and your husband, antsy. 

“Did you eat samgyeopsal?” He shimmies in his seat and asks her teasingly with a finger pointed at his pout. You let out an exasperated sigh. She’s not going to take a dig at her brand new lip gloss too well but she knows better than to answer back. Instead she’s whisked away by another chime from the bane of Baekhyun’s existence. He laughs a little too hard at that and you’re half-convinced that he’s losing the plot. If she doesn’t give her doting father the attention he seeks, anytime soon, he might even cry.

“Who’s texting you at 7 in the evening, nae sarang?” His voice is saccharine but his wide grin is light years away from his eyes.

“Appa, is there a curfew in place for texting that I’m not aware of?” Her chin is delicately perched atop her hand at a picture-perfect angle and her gaze flits between both her parents before meeting the flames in her father’s eyes.The staring contest between both father and daughter is heated. 

To protect the walls of love, compassion, laughter and togetherness of your divine abode from a spontaneous combustion, you intervene with a gentle sprinkle of, “Yeobo, your tonkatsu is getting cold!”

“Eomma, there’s something I learnt at the Western table manners class at Grand Hyatt last week”, she says to you while giving her father side-eye, “Making loud chewing noises while eating is considered rude.”

“Aegiya!” You glower at her while your husband devours the tonkatsu gravy with an obnoxiously loud slurp.

“Gongju-nim, I’ll eat like the royals once you put that phone down and enjoy your meal with your parents.” His eyes are glistening with tears at this point and there’s a slight tremble in your daughter’s hand as her grip on the chopsticks tightens.

The sound of the doorbell cuts through the tension that weighs heavy in the dining room and before you can even count to three, your little bird swooshes to the front door. By the sound of the muffled conversation you could tell exactly who was at the door but Baekhyun is pretty much caught blindsided. He questions you with the panicked wiggle of his brows. You open your mouth to thwart the looming aura of suspense but shove a spoonful of rice in it instead.

“Jagi, something’s definitely wrong.” Brows furrowed, he leans closer to you, urgently murmuring. “She doesn’t even laugh at my Lee Jung Jae impression anymore. And who’s come to see her at this hour?”

She rushes past the dining area and all Baekhyun catches is an ostentatious haze of yellow and gold. “Yah!” He calls after his angel, who is busily ferrying something much larger than her to the privacy of her bedroom. All his shouting is to no avail as she shuts the door on his despair.

Baekhyun’s face is now as red as his eyes. 

“Jagi, what’s going on?” he demands.

“It’s”, you huff, toying with the sliced pork cutlet on your plate, “Pepero Day tomorrow.”

“Huh? Pepero Day?”

His mouth falls open.

***

“Noooooo”, he cries tugging at the hem of your pajama pants with his head nestled in your lap, “She’s too pretty for a scrawny, worthless ---”

You shush him with a flurry of soft pats on his head, “We’re not going to invade her privacy. She needs --”

“Her space! She needs her space. Jagi, you sound like a broken record. Why didn’t she tell me about it?” He cries. “I’m her best friend, her gaming buddy, her hapkido master and --”

“Her overprotective appa. She was certain you wouldn’t take it...well...” You sigh relaxing his clenched fist and lacing your fingers in his. He shifts uncomfortably and his lips meet the tip of your fingers in a tender kiss.

“You remember when she got her first vaccine shot? She didn’t cry at first, my brave little chipmunk.”

“She cried because you did.”

His gaze wanders before resting in the warmth of your eyes and he lets out a chuckle, “She cried because I did. Also, don’t you think vaccinations are too harsh on such teensie dolls?” He huddles closer and wraps his arms around your waist. “She’s my partner in crime, jagiya. Even as a three year old! You remember the time we pranked you when her she couldn’t stop yawning? She didn’t give me any trouble with the medicine either...that gloopy green stuff. Yuck! Had it been you, she probably wouldn’t have taken it so easily you know? She’s the perfect daughter. She makes my birthdays so special, jagi. She taps me on the shoulder with this innocent smile to wake me up for my surprises! She thinks of something different each year. My young inventor maven! She’s Appa’s Special Girl. Her first word was Appa!” 

His winces slightly and continues after a rich pause, “I -- I feel like she’s still my wee baby… I feel like I have to protect her from the world. It’s not a nice place...” He huffs. “If anyone ever hurts her, jagi….I’ll be shattered. I’m not ready for the heartbreak.”

He looks up at you and his eyes seek solace. You put a hand on his forehead to make the creases disappear. “Even if we do it all right, yeobo, we can’t protect her from everything. So just have faith in your upbringing, hmm?”

***

“Gongju-nim - ”

“Appa - ”

They say to each other simultaneously over breakfast and you take it as your cue to exit the room.

“I’ll go first”, Baekhyun crouches and rests his arms on the table, “I shouldn’t have called you Chipmunk in front of your friends...I am sorry.”

“Appa! I am not angry about that at all! I don’t care about what they have to say… Appa I just want you to know that...”

“No--no aegiya, it’s okay you don’t have to --” 

She rushes to her room and brings out a large yellow and gold Pepero bouquet. Shuffling her feet she stretches it out towards him, “Appa this is for you.”

Dumbstruck, Baekhyun accepts his daughter’s token of affection rather reluctantly and after taking a good look at it he sets it aside on the table. His smile is wide and there’s a hint of pride in his eyes, “Aegiya--”

Tightly hugging his waist, she presses her face against his chest. 

“You will always be my first love.”

[writingintheshadowsforever]

Mazikeen x Teenage! Reader

You couldn’t believe how defenseless you were when those bullies came for you. How weak you acted cowering in fear instead of standing up for yourself. Your parents were cops for crying out loud you think you would have some type of fighting skills.

Hell even your little sister could kick someone’s ass if she needed to. Thanks to Maze but whenever the woman offered to give you some lessons in self-defense. You turned her offers down thinking that you wouldn’t ever need them, because most kids at your school knew what your parents did for a living. So that pretty much made you untouchable until today the wannabe gangster in your class. Targeted you as her victim because her big brother got busted the night before by cops. 

Because you were the kid of two cops Sam automatically blamed you. As if you snitched on her brother or something. Christ you didn’t didn’t even know who her brother was, and you highly doubted either of your parents made arrests. You tried to explain that cases like that were below their level, but that only made her angrier, and the beating more painful.

You made sure to stop by your friend’s house before going home. So you could use her make-up to cover up your black-eye, busted lip, and the little cuts on your cheek. No doubt your mom was still at work but Maze and Trixie  were both home by now. The last thing you needed were either of them seeing you like this. You were too old to be having someone else fight your battles you could handle this.

“Y/N” came the sound of your little sister’s voice as soon as you walked through the door. Two seconds later Trixie was leaped at you expecting you to catch her like you always did.

You did catch her but had to bite back a groan as pain exploded in your ribs. You grimaced for a second before fixing your face and spinning her around. “Hey kiddo how was school?”

“It was awesome we went on a really cool field trip” Trixie told you excitedly. Oh how you missed those days “oh yeah you can tell me about it later I got a ton of homework to do” You tell her before she can go into too much detail. Trixie nodded and dropped down from your arms. “Ready for your kung fu lessons little human” Maze asked as she walked came from downstairs.

Trixie nodded and just like that she was off “you want in the kid could use a partner” Maze asked you. You were really considering it but the throbbing pain in your side made you decide against it. “Naw I’ll pass maybe next time” You tell her and walk away as quickly as you can. Maze looks at you suspicously before heading to Trixie.

You spent the rest of the day hiding out in your room trying to come up with a solution for your bully problem. Sam had promised that there would be more to come. That she was going to make your life a living hell until her brother got out of jail. As long as he suffered so would you, and even though you hated to admit it. You were kind of scared of Sam she had a gang of friends to back her up. While you were pretty much a loner, and telling a teacher wouldn’t do any good. Most of them would just try giving the bully a stern lecture or call their parents. It never did any good you slam your face into a pillow and let out a scream. What were you going to do?

Maze wasn’t too suspicious when you opted out of kung fu lessons. After all unlike your little sister you never really got to excited about violence. You always preferred to watch or just play with your phone. But you never missed dinner or your little sitcoms that came on. Plus something just felt off about your behavior today. For one you were late coming home from school, you basically blew Trixie off, and she hadn’t missed that painful look on your face. When from the hug normally Maze would just text Chloe when you acted weird. So she would know to talk to you when she got home, but her case would keep her out all night. 

“Hey y/n your half of the pizza is getting cold might wanna come get it before Trixie devours it” she yelled. Banging on your door you were cocooned in your blankets with your head buried beneath the pillows. You hadn’t come up with any good plan to put a stop to the bullying . The frustration got to you so bad that you just ended up crying. Food was the last thing on your mind right now. “I’m not hungry You yelled back although your voice was muffled.” Okay something was definitely wrong with you.

Maze opened the door and was surprised to see you were in the dark. She flipped the light switch on and let out a sigh at the sight of you all wrapped up. “Alright bigger human come out of that blanket shield and talk to me” she demanded. At first you shook your head no but then realized she probably couldn’t see that. “No just go away Maze” You yelled trying to sound irritated but your voice cracked. She would definitely think you were weak and pathetic. One thing you forgot about Maze she wasn’t going to argue with you or bargain at all. 

You let a yelp as you tumbled onto the floor from the result of Maze pulling on the blankets till they unraveled. Luckily enough the blankets also cushioned your fall so it didn’t really hurt. But your bruised ribs didn’t take the fall so lightly either causing you to let out a pained groan while gripping your side. Alright I probably should’ve been gentler Maze thought. “You ready to tell me what’s going on? How did you get hurt?” 

You get up and take a seat on the bed but refuse to look at Maze or answer her questions. Filled with too much shame to tell her the truth and know she’ll see the lie coming from a mile away. What she does next surprises you Maze sits beside you and wraps a comforting arm around your shoulder pulling you to her. “Come on whatever is it can’t be that bad I won’t tell your mom if that’s what you’re worried about” she says with a smirk. She probably thinks that you beat someone up or pulled off a prank getting yourself hurt in the process. You could run with either of those lies but that would do no good.

“I got beat up by these stupid kids in my grade today after school” you whispered secretly hoping she didn’t hear you. Maze instantly went into to protective mode jumping up and pulling out two knives. “Someone hurt you who are they and where do they live? I’ll take care of them.” 

“Maze no you can’t hurt them they’re too young you would go to jail” You tell her with your hands held up motioning for her to calm down.

To your relief Maze put the knives away but then turned her attention back to you “why didn’t you fight back and kick their ass?” You look down a the floor when you answer “because I don’t know how to defend myself, and there was like 4 of them. Maze wanted to go back on the offense she wanted to know who hurt you, so she could take care of them. But you were right it wasn’t like in Hell there were too many rules here in place. You would have to take care of this, and she was going to show you how. “Come on kung fu class in back in session she says motioning for you to follow her.

You opened your mouth to protest but Maze stopped you with one determined glance. “The only way to deal with bullies is to show them you’re no one to be messed with. I’m going to teach you how and tomorrow you’re going to put it to good use.

“But what about mom? she’ll freak out when the school calls her” You say nervously. “Like I said we don’t have to tell your mom, and don’t worry I’ll make sure the school calls me instead” Maze reassures you. Finally she drags you downstairs where Trixie has eaten your half of the pizza, and is excited to help you learn kung fu.

Maze teaches all sorts of moves ranging from mildly painful to downright deadly, but warns you not to use the deadly ones. By the time y’all are done there’s a part of you that can’t wait to go to school tomorrow. Your mom comes in at around 1 am and just as promised. Maze doesn’t tell her a thing she decides that she’ll let Chloe know after you get your revenge.

The Next Day 

Sam wastes no time in hunting down before first period can even start. She locates you at your locker leaning up against whistling a happy tune. “You’re pretty relaxed for someone who’s about to be stuffed in your locker” she says cracking her knuckles. You just smirk and roll your shoulders and take a lazy fighting stance. Her three lackeys laugh at you and all of them start walking towards you. It doesn’t take long before a crowd has appeared around you and the bullies. Oh you were definitely going to enjoy this.

An hour later 

At first Maze was beyond annoyed at whoever woke her up at this ungodly hour and was going to maim. Whoever was on the other end of the cellphone until your principal told her. She needed to come down to the school now because they couldn’t reach Chloe or Dan courtesy of her meddling. She swiped your mom’s phone last night while she was in the shower forcing her to just to just leave without it this morning. She got Lucifer who was always eager to mess with Dan to get rid of your dad’s phone. Leaving her as the only option for the school to call.

She wants to observe the damage you did when she gets to the school, but sadly all four kids are in the nurse’s offices. With bloody noses possibly broken, black eyes, busted lips, and more. You sit in the principal’s office with a proud look on your face. When Maze finally arrives with a bored look on hers “you called me” she says jerking her chin at your principal. She took a seat beside you and propped her feet up on the desk.

The principal’s eyes widened slightly at Maze’s actions she wasn’t who she expected at all. “Um yes Ms.Smith it seems y/n assaulted four of her classmates today one of them has a broken arm and one a concussion-” she pauses on her explanation. At the sight of Maze holding up her fist which you bump before crossing your arms again. “Nice job kid” Maze praises you making the principal gape.

“You do realize she is going to be suspended possibly expelled for her actions” The principal exclaimed angrily. “Really because those kids assaulted her yesterday and y’all did nothing” Maze fired back. “That doesn’t give her a right to beat them up she should’ve came to us the principal protested. Although she gulped as Maze suddenly stood up and walked around the desk to her pushing her chair to the wall. You sat up in anticipation of what was about to happen.

“And exactly what would you have done to prevent from happening today? Would you have expelled or suspended them on sight or lead some stupid investigation?” The principal just babbled incoherently trying to explain the process because without any hardcore evidence of bullying. The school definitely wouldn’t have done anything solid today to protect you. “See so y/n had to take this situation into her own hands” Maze tells her leaning in closer to the principal. Who is starting to shake a little bit in the chair out of fear.

“Hey Maze come on you don’t want want to make things worse” You tell her with a nervous chuckle. No doubt afraid of what would happen when your mom eventually found out. Maze nodded and backed away but it was too late the principal had made up her mind. “Take your godchild and leave she is EXPELLED” the terrified lady yelled.

Later on that day

Chloe stared you down while you squirmed under scrutinizing gaze all the bravo you felt earlier gone. Your mom did find out when the school finally managed to reach her through her job, and told her what happened. Chloe made it home in a record time from the police station and found you with Maze recounting the event. Of what went down when Sam and her crew tried to force you in her locker. She was engrossed with your story until she saw Chloe behind you with one eyebrow raised.

You paused your story and slowly turned around Chloe pointed to the chair beside Maze, and you sat down. Your eyes now focused on the floor “Maze you can go we’ll talk later I need a minute with y/n” you heard Maze get up and leave. You were still to nervous to gather up the courage too look at your mom. You realized how wrong you were she was more disappointed in you for getting in trouble. Than she would’ve been if you had just told her the truth and gotten her to handle it.

“Hey tiger its okay you can look at me” Chloe told you. The nickname coming from your love of wildcats. You looked to the side instead making her sigh and grip your chin gently. Chloe made you look at her to your surprise she had a softened expression on her face. Not an angry one like you thought she would.

“Did those kids really hurt you?” she asked frowning slightly. You nodded wanting to look away again but Chloe wouldn’t let you. 

“Why didn’t you come to me y/n? I would’ve taken care of it.” Chloe looked sad at the fact that you didn’t trust her enough to come to her with your problems. “I didn’t want to disappoint you. I felt like I should’ve been able to handle myself you know You explained.”

“Oh sweetheart you never have to handle things on your own. No matter what it is you can tell me and I promise I’ll help you with it.” With those words Chloe pulled you into her arms you hugged her back a few tears falling from your eyes. 

“Does this mean I’m not in trouble?” you ask hopefully. 

Chloe laughs as she pulls away for a second “no you’re grounded indefinitely and no more kung fu lessons from Maze.”

“Hey that’s not fair Decker the kid did good” Maze yells from the stairs making you laugh and Chloe frown.

[booksandseventeen]

School Project with Tsuki

☾ ☽Tsuki X Reader! ☾ ☽

The teacher stood with her hands on her hips, looking every student in the eye, “This next project is worth 50% of your grade.”

The classroom groaned. 

“You will be partnered up and during these last 6 weeks of school, you must go to 6 places neither of you have ever been before. Search the wonders of Miyagi and write a paragraph for each place you visit.” The teacher claps her hands together, “Consider this a great experience you can enjoy outside of school, as long as the places you visit was informational, I dont care where you go.” 

Tsuki sighed, his fingers twitching to put on his headphones and drone out the rest of this dreadful project. Partnered project were his least favorite part about school, but at least he could just tag along while Tadashi did the work, he could practically feel his friend vibrating with excitement behind him.

“Oh and before I forget, your partner will be the person that sits to the left of you~!” 

Tsuki blinked before glancing to the left. 

Empty. Of course his partner wasn’t even at school today. He raked his brain to try and think who sat to the left of him but he kept drawing a blank.

“Tsukishima, your partner isn’t here today but I trust that you can bring her the needed materials and tell her about the project, hm?” The teacher walked to his desk and set down a binder filled with information.

He pushed his glasses up, “Tch, what a burden.”

☾ ☽

“tell your partner I said hi!” Tadashi waved goodbye as they went their own ways, Tadashi to go home and Tsuki to visit your house, a torn out piece of paper with your address written on it. The paper fluttered in the wind and he sighed before continuing on.

The gate creaked when he opened it, weeds sprouted from the ground and a gnome broken in half welcomed him as he stepped on the overgrown stepping stones that led to your home. 

He knocked on the door and took a wary step back, unsure of who would answer the door. 

“COME IN!” The scream made him jump and he looked behind him almost as if the yell was meant for someone else.

He narrowed his eyes, felt his fingers tighten on the binder. All he wanted to do was drop off the stupid papers and hope his partner was fine with doing the project by themselves. 

Slowly, he turned the doorknob and stepped inside. The lights blinded him, a tv was playing on a random channel, a radio station played some sort of upbeat tune and he heard the thumping of feet above his head.

“up here!” the voice came from above. 

He took one more glance around before taking the steps two at a time, the hallway was just as lit as the living room, every door he passed had the lights on and he finally stopped behind the only closed door, music playing from a speaker somewhere inside.

The door opened, “Mom, did you-” she stopped suddenly. 

Tsuki stared down at the girl in front of him, she wore an oversized sweatshirt and joggers. Her hair was piled up on top of her hair. She leaned against the door frame, “You’re not mom.”

“Do I look like your mom?” he deadpanned

“Well, you got the condescending look down.” she smirked, “You’re in my class, what are you doing here?” she crossed her arms and looked him up and down. 

“Here.” He pushed the binder into her hands, “We’re partners for a project in school. It’s all in there, due in 6 weeks.” He turned to leave. 

He got as far as halfway down the stairs when the shock wore off and she thundered down after him.

“wait wait wait! You come to my house, tell me that we are partners for a project, and you expect me to do it all my myself?” She slides down the banister until she stops in front of him, making him come up short. 

“what else needs to be explained, shorty?” he looked down his nose at her. 

“You’re gonna pull your weight with this project, jolley green giant.” 

his frown deepened. “I don’t do partner projects.” 

She smiled up at him, “let me get my jacket.”

“what for?” he called after her.

“Because we might as well start now! You can borrow my sisters bike!”

☾ ☽ Week 1

It was on the tip of the tongue. Questions upon questions, but he bit his tongue, he refused to talk first. Instead the words just tumbled over and over again in his head. 

She biked beside him, a green jacket thrown over her hoodie and her bag thrown across her body. The full moon was the only light they had and the summer wind threw back her hair and he glanced at her to find that her eyes were closed. She was the most peaceful when her eyes were closed. 

He couldn’t take it anymore, the silence.

“Where are we going? You know we have school tomorrow.” his voice seemed unnaturally loud.

she looked over at him, the moon causing her eyes to seem brighter than usual “you’ll see.” 

Finally, they came to an overlook and parked their bike under a sakura tree. 

The ground crunched beneath their feet as they came to a railing. Tsuki stopped short and she reached up to close his mouth with her fingertip. 

It was a 360º view of Sanriku, the rhododendrons flowers blanketed the side of the mountain for as far as the eye could see, the sweet smell of flowers overwhelmed him.

she leaned with her elbows on the railing. “You know whats cool? These flowers are actually a blushing pink color. But at night, under the moon, they almost look violet.” she looked up at him. 

“some things look different in the dark.”

☾ ☽ Week 2

He woke up to the sound of his phone ringing, without thinking he blindly searched for it and answered, before he even brought it to his ear he could hear the notes of music.

“hey! you’re awake, skyscraper?”

“What the hell do you want, hobbit?” he grumbled and blinked blearily at his alarm clock, “it’s almost 2 am.” 

“Well I have another idea for our next location! But we gotta do it now, we can get in for free under the cover of night.” 

he could just imagine her. Walking up and down her room, lights on and music playing, twirling her hair around her finger, probably looking for a hoodie.

“I’ll take your silence as a yes! I’ll come pick you up after I find a hoodie.....”

☾ ☽

“Are you kidding?” he deadpanned.

“What? it’s perfect! Now help me push this thing.” she bent down and grabbed the end of the kayak, moving it only a couple of inches before she gave him a pointed look.

Sighing, he bent down and helped her move the kayak until it was even with the dock and she could jump in. 

“Come on! This is a two person thing.” 

“Why did I let you talk me into this?”

the moon reflected her profile into the still water, a fish flicked the surface and her face rippled. He took a step into the kayak.

She smiled at him and tossed him a paddle.

They glided through the water, him paddling on the right and she on the left. He sat behind her, his legs splayed on either side of her so he could fit. 

Again, the silence bothered him.

“Do you ever sleep?” he asked suddenly.

If he wasn’t paying so much attention to her he would have noticed her back stiffen. 

“why do you think I dont?” 

He shrugged but realized she probably couldn’t see that. “Oh I don’t know, maybe because you always seem to be up in the middle of the night, I’ve never seen your house without any lights on.”

She stops paddling but he keeps going. He can’t see her face, and for once, he wishes she would turn around.

“I...just don’t like to sleep.”

“who doesn’t like to sleep?”

she picks up the paddle again, disrupting the surface one stroke at a time. “someone who has too many dreams.” 

☾ ☽ Week 3

It was a Saturday night and he hadn’t heard from her all week. He turned off his computer and looked at his phone. This was peak time that she should be calling him, but what if she didn’t call? Then they would be a week behind the project. He paced his room, his phone clenched in his hand. He clicked on the buttons angrily.

No answer. He tossed his phone on the bed and laid down. Ten minutes later he was pacing again. He cursed and grabbed his phone and jacket. Silently making his way out of his house.

☾ ☽

*tap, tap tap*

She awoke with a start, her lights momentarily blinding her before he realized where she was at. She leaned out of her window and stared down at Tsuki, his arm cocked back to throw another rock.

“what are you doing?” she half whispered half yelled.

“Tch, idiot, I don’t want to be behind on the project so grab your hoodie and come on.” he walked away, leaving her to stare at him open mouthed. 

“where are we going?” she asked him as they grabbed their bikes and walked down the road. 

“you didn’t answer your phone.” he said, ignoring her question. 

“I had it on mute, hoping to catch a few Z’s.”

Immediately he felt bad, he had woken her up. But then he remembered that she had also woken him up before as well. “i’m sorry.” he heard himself say anyway.

She shook her head, her hair piled on top of her head, “don’t be. I’m thankful you woke me up, I was just starting to dream.” 

the rest of the ride was in silence until he finally brought them to their next location.

“a park.” she said with a smile, getting off her bike the rest of the way.

Before them lay a green field, a playground that was surrounded by strange, different styles of twisting metals and granite rocks chiseled to reveal a figure.

“A statue park.” he corrected, “artists all over Miyagi enter their statues and art in hopes of getting picks to have it displayed here.” 

Together they walked through the swaying grass, the silver of moon casting the statues faces into grimaces and sneers. She shook her head in wonder as they walked among the stones and metal.

“I like this one!” she said, pointing at a woman with a ring of drums around her that acted like a skirt. Tsuki watched as she played an offbeat tune on the statue. He laughed.

“look over there!” she suddenly pointed and grabbed his hand, running towards an exhibit. He looked down at their joined fingers, his large palm easily overwhelming her small one. He tightened his fingers. 

A large, plush cushion lay suspended in the air by a steel tractor type, a gossamer fabric hung over the top. The two of them climbed into it. “I think i’m supposed to unlatch something.” he heard her say, but he was too busy looking at the fabric laid over top. 

faint, dark lines were carefully drawn through the fabric, making it so that he could see the constellations in the sky. There was a loud click and he was suddenly thrown on his back as the large cushion suddenly swung in the air.

“WOOHOO!” he looked over to see her wobbling on her legs, the air rushing to meet her face.

“this is so cool!” she gasped, and slowly made her way over to him as the cushion swayed like a pendulum. She laid down beside him, her head on the his shoulder and his arm immediately went around her. 

“Im afraid to fall asleep.” she whispered after they had been laying down together for while, he had honestly thought she had fallen asleep.

“go ahead.” he grunted, he felt her shake his head.

“I can’t...I might dream.”

“what do you dream about?”

“...someone.”

he tightened his hold on her. “It’s just a dream, if it looks like your dreaming, i’ll wake you up.” he promised. his lips brushed against her hair, not hard enough for her to feel it, but close enough for him to close his eyes and inhale her scent.

And that’s how the workers of the park found them the next day, curled into one another, the cushion still swinging, the morning light not bothering either of them.

☾ ☽ 1 day later

He stood in front of her house, the flowers he had picked up on the way there dropped from his hand. 

A red, ugly foreclosure sign was the only thing he could see. 

She was gone. 

☾ ☽

Part 2

[jalapeno-princess]

Misunderstandings

Mark Tuan X Reader

Word Count: 5.3k

Summary: You’re failing your marine biology class and your best friend Youngjae recommends you sign up for tutoring. When you walk in to the tutoring center and your eyes land on the handsome boy who claims to be your tutor, you grow excited to start your sessions but you don’t know whether it’s because you have hope to pass your class or because you get to spend time with Mark. As the weeks go by, you end up developing feelings for the older boy and little do you know, he ends up falling for you too.

A/N: My last day of class was yesterday and I wrote this story last week the day before my finals and I was failing my marine biology class (please do not sign up for marine biology unless you’re passionate about science because I did not understand a fucking thing but ya girl got a C GOD BLESS) the thought of Mark as a tutor makes me cry I would purposely fail a class just to have him tutor me

“Y/n, it’s really not that bad. A 64 is still passing. D’s get degrees—“ 

You yanked your quiz from your best friend’s hands and began to walk away out of frustration. You had taken your midterms just a few days ago and you‘ve been studying for all five of your classes for the last month. There was no problem with any of your four other classes. However, science was never your forte; specifically marine biology. 

When you were first signing up for classes, the idea of learning more about the ocean and marine animals intrigued you. Therefore, you didn’t hesitate to add Marine 465 to your schedule. Unfortunately, once you began the class you were ultimately regretting your decision. 

For the most part, you considered yourself to be pretty smart. Sure, some classes were easier than others but you always tried your best when it came to your education no matter how hard the subject was. You’d put in more time in studying and went the extra mile to make sure you succeeded no matter how difficult the class was. 

As soon as your professor started with his lectures, you felt extremely lost and no matter how hard you studied, you weren’t retaining any information. It was as if everything you learned about sea level rise, coral bleaching and erosion went through one ear and out the other. When you received the exam a few days prior, your heart immediately sank like it normally did whenever you’d take the first look at an exam and did not understand a single thing. 

You were sure you studied for this midterm the longest out of all your classes but no matter how hard you tried, you just weren’t meant to do well. You answered every single question to the best of your ability and you had a tiny bit of hope that you did decently; but when your professor passed back your graded tests right before ending class, you were on the verge of tears.

“Youngjae, I am a nursing major. I can’t get anything lower than an A. This is so disappointing. Might as well turn in my scrubs now and drop out of the program. There’s no use! Nothing is going to help me at this point. There’s only one more assignment and that’s the final exam. Even if I do well on my exam, the highest grade I’ll get is a B. A B isn’t good enough Jae. Fuck science. What does marine biology even have to do with nursing? I don’t recall having to give shots to sea turtles!” 

The older boy caught up to you and pulled you into his embrace in attempts to calm you down. After six years of friendship, he was completely aware of what a goal driven person you were. Whatever you set your mind to, you’d do anything in your power to achieve it. After taking a look at the grade you were given, Youngjae knew that chances of you getting an A were extremely slim; but it didn’t mean it was impossible. 

Your best friend saw you through both your highest and lowest points and he knew you could handle anything negative that life threw at you. Your marine biology class was no exception. 

“I really don’t know what to do other than withdrawal and retake it again next semester.” You released an exhausted sigh before taking a seat on the nearest bench. 

“Have you ever thought about tutoring? Oh come on, don’t give me that look. What? Is the great y/n y/l/n too good for tutoring? Even the smartest students ask for help sometimes y/n, it wouldn’t hurt for you to ask for help once in a while. Maybe you’ll have an easier time learning from someone one on one rather than when your professor teaches your entire class. I’ll even go with you if that’ll make you feel more comfortable.” 

You gave him a soft smile before ruffling his hair. “Fine. We’ll go tomorrow. But if one of those nerds wants to get smart with me, I won’t hesitate to throw hands.” Youngjae’s laughter engulfed throughout the front lawn as the two of you continued to make your way to your last class. 

The next day, you found yourself hiding in the library and began ignoring Youngjae’s calls and texts to find out where you were. Right after he dropped you off to your apartment the night before, you decided that you did not want to go along with having to seek help with your studies. To say you were a stubborn person was an understatement and you knew you were being childish trying to refuse Youngjae’s attempts at trying to help you with your grades; but you hated the thought of having to be tutored because it reminded you that maybe you weren’t necessarily great at everything as much as you wanted to be. 

Knowing how you could be, he knew exactly why you weren’t answering his calls and he was well aware that you were planning on running away from his recommendation. One thing Youngjae loved most about you was your confidence and how you had such a good head on your shoulders. It was also something he cared about the least seeing as how you refused help from others no matter how much you obviously needed it. He began to search for you throughout the entire campus and since he knew you like the back of his hand, it didn’t take him long to find you. 

When you felt an arm on your shoulder, you jumped in surprise but released a frustrated grunt when you realized who it was. “Youngjae—“ he shook his head before gathering up your things and reached for your hand. 

“You’re not getting out of this. Y/n, just because you’re receiving help from someone else, doesn’t mean you’re any less smarter than you are. Stop being so stubborn. The tutors are genuinely nice people and they just want to help you. If you keep this act up then just take the F already. I don’t know what else to do for you!” 

Seeing your best friend so upset over something that wasn’t even his fault made you feel like a terrible person. He was only trying to help you because he hated seeing you beat yourself up over something he knew you tried your best at. Which is why you pulled him in to your embrace and leaned your head on his shoulder while whispering countless apologies against the juncture of his neck and finally agreeing to receiving help from a tutor. 

You’ve never been to the tutoring center before because you instilled it in yourself that tutoring was the last thing you ever wanted to go through but you were desperate. 

“Hi, how can we help you today?” 

For a moment, you felt like a little kid. Since you only agreed to be there a few minutes ago, you didn’t really understand how the tutoring center worked. You turned around to Youngjae and gave him a knowing look to which he sighed.

“She’s not doing too well in her marine biology class and needs a tutor.” 

The girl at the counter nodded in understanding before taking a look at her computer. After a couple of seconds, she picked up her phone and dialed whom you assumed to be your tutor. 

“Mark will be here in a few minutes. Please sign in and have a seat over there.”

You did as you were told and sat down on one of the couches before beginning to pick at your nails nervously. Youngjae gently squeezed your thigh before gently shoving you. 

“Hey, it’s just tutoring. You’re acting as you’re going for a job interview or something. It’s going to be just fine.” 

You heard some sneakers against the ground and when you looked up, your eyes widened in shock. He wasn’t someone you’d expect to be a tutor. As much as you didn’t want to be stereotypical and assume that all tutors were someone who wore glasses and suspenders, that was your idea of what your tutor would look like. 

The boy standing in front of you was wearing converse, a pair of gray sweats and a flannel. His hair was dark brown with soft, fluffy curls and the toothy grin he flashed you made your cheeks warm. 

“Y/n? Hey, I’m Mark. Follow me.” 

Youngjae gave you a wink before shoving you towards the extremely good looking boy. 

“So, I was told you need some help in marine biology. Do you mind taking out some of your homework and maybe some of your notes so I can get an idea of what you might need help with?” 

You sat down at the table with all of his things and began to pull out everything he was asking for from your backpack. After you took out your work and handed it to him, he started to look over your papers and began writing something down. 

“These are really good notes, but I think you’re having a hard time with analyzing and understanding the material. That’s why I’m here.” 

For three hours, Mark tried his best in making the lessons easier for you to comprehend by drawing out some key terms that he thought would help you get an idea of marine life. Once he felt you had enough for the day, he handed you back your papers and gave you a soft smile. 

“Good work today. I’m sorry if you still are having a hard time understanding, but I’ll be glad to help you up until your finals. How does that sound?” 

The idea of spending more time with him sent a warm feeling to your tummy. Throughout your entire session, he was extremely patient with you and even threw in a couple of jokes to make the atmosphere more relaxing. He even let you take a couple breaks as the two of you began asking each other a couple of questions to become more familiar with one another. 

You found out he was an engineering major but he was minoring in marine biology. From the time he was younger, he was always fascinated with the ocean and wanted to find ways to help preserve it. Hearing him talk about how passionate he was in finding solutions for climate change and coral bleaching brought you in a daze. Before you could leave, you both exchanged numbers and planned another day to meet up again. 

Once you began making your way back to where Youngjae was, you could feel your heart rate increase at the thought of seeing Mark again. 

“So, how did it go?” You shrugged before motioning for him to get up. 

“It was okay. He’s nice and you can tell he’s very passionate about marine biology. But I just have a hard time grasping the information. I don’t know about this Jae. It’s useless. I don’t want to waste his time.” 

Youngjae grabbed your backpack and your books as the two of you began walking towards his car. If there was anything Youngjae hated, it was hearing you talk so negatively about yourself. 

“Y/n, you’re not wasting his time. He signed up to do this for a reason. You’re not going to retain all this information in one session. You’re going to have to meet up with him multiple times in order to complete understand everything your professor is teaching you. I wasn’t there to see how he goes about with teaching you, but I’m sure they don’t let just anybody become a tutor. Don’t give up before actually trying okay? He could be the reason you’ll get an A at the end of the semester so just hang in there.” 

You weren’t afraid of Mark not being able to help you raise your grade. It was obvious he knew what he was talking about. You were afraid of gaining feelings for him because you felt that he would only become a distraction. It was already hard enough for you to learn about marine life, what more if you were to develop a crush on the person whose supposed to be teaching it to you? 

Over the course of a month, you’d meet up with Mark on Monday’s, Wednesday’s and Friday’s from 2:30 to 5:00. It didn’t take you long to finally get the hang of understanding the lessons your professor would teach you in class and you were excited when you found yourself catching on to the information Mark was giving you. 

Unfortunately, your feelings for Mark only grew more and more with each and every session. You’d catch yourself stealing glances at him every so often and daydream about what it would be like to kiss his cute little heart shaped lips, to run your fingers through his curly locks, to hold his pretty hands and to be held by him. But it was dangerous to think like that. No matter how kind he was to you, he never showed any interest in you and you had to accept that all you’d ever be to him was just another person he’d tutor. 

There were a couple of times Mark attended class with you in order for him to find out why you were having such a hard time learning and the thought of him taking time out of his day just to sit in on your marine biology class made your heart flutter like a school girl. He only wants to see how the professor is teaching so that he can make the lessons simpler for you stop giving yourself false hope y/n. 

Finally, the day of your final exam came and you were extremely nervous to say the least. No matter how long you’ve been preparing for this, all the sleepless nights you’d stay up studying on top of your tutoring sessions with Mark; you didn’t think you were ready to take it. 

As you made your way in to the lecture hall, you could feel your palms getting sweaty as your heart rate began to increase and it wasn’t a good feeling. Right before class could start, you felt a vibration coming from your bag and when you checked your phone to see the notification, a huge smile rose on your face.

Mark🤓: Good luck today y/n. You’ll do great! I believe in you. Let’s meet up once you’re done with the exam. You got this!👍🏻

Most people would consider it such a simple text of encouragement, but to you it meant the world. He had faith in you and with that knowledge alone, a burst of confidence ran through your veins and as soon as your professor passed out the exams, you began answering every single question without hesitation. It felt as if Mark was right next to you, cheering you on and it was such an amazing feeling. 

Everything he’s been teaching you for the last two months just kept flowing through your mind and before you knew it, you were finished. You took a few moments to go over your test to make sure you answered them to the best of your knowledge and once you were done you handed in your exam and dialed Mark’s number. 

“Hey y/n! How did it go?” You hummed cheerfully as you made your way down the hall. 

“I’d like to think it went well, but we won’t know until next week. Where are you? I wanna treat you to lunch as a small thank you for all your help.” 

Although you couldn’t see him, you knew he was probably smirking at the idea of food. A lot of your sessions were held at the cafeteria and the coffee shop on campus because Mark loved to eat. His love for food was adorable, and so was he. Only then did it hit you that you would no longer be needed Mark’s help and you felt your chest getting heavy when you realized you wouldn’t get to see him anymore. Other than Youngjae, Mark was one of the only people who genuinely made you happy. In fact, he was one of your only sources of happiness and you wanted to be with him as much as you could. 

“I’m in the library, but I‘ll make my way to you so you don’t have to walk so far. Are you still in the science building?” You absentmindedly smiled knowing he wanted to make things easier for you by meeting you half way. 

“Yeah. I’ll be sitting by the front door. See you soon.” While you were waiting, you took out your phone and texted Youngjae that you were finished with the exam. He was quick to respond and asked you if you wanted to go out and celebrate to which you let him know that you were treating Mark to lunch. Knowing how your best friend could be and how he’s been teasing you about Mark ever since the day he began tutoring you, you weren’t surprised to read the messages he sent you.

🦦: Can I tag along? Or are you finally going tell lover boy how you feel about him? Come on y/n, it’s been months. The worst he can do is tell you he doesn’t feel the same and you can go back to being strangers. The y/n I know is an extremely courageous person who will do whatever she possibly can to get what she wants and a boy is no different.

🦦: But I’ve seen the way he looks at you when he thinks you’re not looking. He gets all starry eyed and shit. As if the sun shines out of your ass.

🦦: make me proud y/n 😉

It didn’t take Youngjae long to realize you had feelings for Mark. You’ve never really had a crush before, so Youngjae knew there was meaning behind the blush on your cheeks and how flustered you’d get after every session with Mark. He was also quick to notice how you were always holding your phone as if you were waiting for a text from someone. When he confronted you about it, he was shocked when you didn’t try to lie about it and he was also secretly very excited. He’s been rooting for the two of you ever since Mark introduced himself for the first time two months ago. 

If Youngjae had it his way, he would’ve went up to Mark and confessed your feelings for him a long time ago, but he was never one to get involved in your personal life if you didn’t want him to.

“Hey, ready to go?” You nodded in agreement as he grabbed your books and slung your backpack over his shoulder like he normally did. It was little gestures like this that made you feel like he had reciprocated your feelings but then again, he was a gentleman to everyone. You’ve witnessed how he’d hold doors for everyone, how he always greeted someone he knew and how he’d always lend a hand if he felt like someone was in need. It was just who he was and you couldn’t confuse his acts of kindness for romantic feelings. 

The walk to his car was quiet, but it was a peaceful kind of silence. However, once he opened your door and you both got inside, he turned on the radio and began to sing along. He did this every time the two of you would go somewhere off campus. Mark was an actual ray of sunshine and sometimes he’d even get you to sing along. 

Sometimes, you’d find yourself dozing off at the thought of holding his hand that he wasn’t using to drive and leaving a kiss on his cheek at a stoplight. A lot of the times you would day dream, it would be made up scenarios of him and what it would be like to date him. You were suddenly broken out of your thoughts when he softly tapped on your thigh to let you know that you both arrived to the restaurant. 

Lunch was amazing. He made you go over the test questions and your responses for a small portion of it before beginning many conversations with you about anything your hearts desired. Conversation flowed smoothly between the both of you as if you had been friends for years and every time he laughed at something you had said, you could feel butterflies fill up the entirety of your tummy. Mark had such a distinct laugh and for someone who looked as manly and broad as he did, you wouldn’t expect such a adorable and extremely high pitched laugh to come out of him. It was your favorite sound and you were happy knowing you were the cause of it. 

To your dismay, your time together was soon coming to an end and you were surprised to find out that you’ve been at lunch with Mark for almost three hours. People weren’t kidding when they say time flies when you’re having fun. After you finished paying, you walked back to his car and he began to drive you back to your apartment. The confession was at the tip of your tongue. Youngjae’s words filled your mind. The worst he can do is tell you he doesn’t feel the same. 

As much as you wanted to know whether or not he harbored the same feelings for you, you didn’t want to make a fool out of yourself if you found out he didn’t see you in that way. 

“Hey, everything okay?” You looked at him in curiosity and gave him a fake smile. 

“I’m fine. Just nervous about what I got on the exam but I’ll be fine. Thanks for dropping me off.” 

He playfully pinched your cheek and made his way out of the car in order to open your door for you. Sometimes you hated how much of a gentleman he was, it only made your feelings for him grow stronger. 

“Of course! Thanks again for lunch. By the way, you have nothing to worry about y/n, I’m sure you did great. Don’t forget to text me as soon as you get the results. Until then, good luck with the rest of your exams. Have a nice rest of your day.” 

As you watched him drive away, you felt your heart sink. I like you. Why was it hard so hard to say those three words? Now you’d never know how he felt about you nor did you know when the next time you’d see him is. But if he liked you, wouldn’t he have made a move on you already? 

Exactly a week later, your professor emailed you and the rest of your class that grades were posted. Your fingers hovered over your log in but a part of you was hesitant to see what grade you were given. You were sure your heart was about to jump out of your chest and you had wished Youngjae was at your side when you were to find out the results. Or even better, Mark. 

You sent him a quick text to see where he was and what he was up to and he let you know that he was at his apartment. He asked if you wanted to go over causing heat to rise upon your cheeks. You’ve never been to his apartment before, so the idea excited you and you couldn’t wait to see him again. One week away from him was torture and you didn’t know how your life was going to be now that you no longer needed his help. He gave you the directions to his apartment and you quickly got ready so you could go and give him the news. The drive to his place felt like forever and you knew it was because you were on your way to see the boy who owned your heart. 

Once you parked your car and made your way up to his apartment, you could feel your palms getting sweaty and you soon grew nauseous. You giggled when you saw his doormat; of course he’d get one with marine animals on it. After taking a moment to breathe, you softly knocked on his door and waited for him to open it. 

As soon as he opened the door and you saw that he was only wearing basketball shorts you coughed up a bit and internally screamed at yourself for doing so. You knew Mark was built, but you didn’t think he was hiding a six pack and a very defined v-line under all of those flannels and sweatshirts. 

“Hey y/n! Sorry about the lack of clothing, I’m doing a load of laundry. Can I get you something to drink or eat?” You were still so focused on how attractive Mark was and how you were alone with him in his apartment to the point where you almost forgot the reason for being there. 

“No thank you. I um, I actually came here because I got the exam results and I didn’t want to look at them by myself so I thought I’d look at them with you. I’m sorry if I interrupted you.” He shook his head in disagreement before taking a seat next to you on his couch. 

“Don’t worry about it. I’m never too busy for you and I wanted to know what you got! I’m not even the one who took the exam and I’ve been anticipating your grade the entire week. But I know it’s because I saw how much time and effort you put in studying for this exam. So let’s see what your score is.” 

He sent you a wink and you were sure you were now red as a tomato from both the gesture and his words. You took out your phone and logged in to your school account. After you pulled up your name, you immediately handed him the phone and covered your eyes. 

“You look at it, I can’t do it.” He giggled softly at your worried expression before scrolling through your phone. When you didn’t hear anything from him after a few moments, your heart began to sink. That was all until you were being lifted off of the couch and pulled in to Mark’s arms. He wrapped his arms around your thighs and spun you around. 

“Congratulations y/n! You got a 98! See, I told you there was nothing to worry about! I knew you had it in you. I’m so proud of you.” 

Right as you were about to respond, his lips were on yours. It was as if time stopped and the room began spinning. You could’ve sworn you were dreaming yet you found yourself deepening the kiss as your arms made their way around his neck. His lips tasted like a mixture of mangoes and Cheetos puffs; an odd combination but one that you were now in love with because it was unique, just like him. All too suddenly, he pulled away and placed you down while beginning to pace back and forth around his living room. 

“Y/n, I’m so sorry. That was so uncalled for I shouldn’t have done that. I don’t know what came over me. Please don’t tell your boyfriend—“ 

You looked at him in confusion before asking him what he was talking about. “That guy you’re always with. The one who waits for you during our tutoring sessions. Is he not your boyfriend?” It all made sense now. The reason why Mark wasn’t taking things further in your relationship was because he thought Youngjae was your boyfriend. That took a weight off of your shoulders. 

“No. That’s my best friend Youngjae. He’s been telling me to confess my feelings to you for over a month now but I was afraid you didn’t like me. I’m hoping that kiss meant that you do or else I’ll be taking my leave now.” 

You began walking towards the door but you were soon colliding with his broad chest while his hands made their way down to your waist. 

“I like you a lot y/n. More than I’d like to admit if I’m being honest. I just assumed you and Youngjae were a couple when I first saw the two of you together. I realized I was developing feelings for you around our third meeting when you went in to detail about why you want to become a nurse. Seeing how wide your eyes got in excitement as you described your love for helping others made my heart combust. You’re so adorable, you know that? Extremely beautiful too. And as I got to see how dedicated you were to your studies and your education, it made me come to terms with my feelings and I finally accepted them even if I felt like it was wrong having a crush on you while thinking you had a boyfriend.” 

He stole one more kiss from the corner of your lips and placed some hair behind your ear. “I looked forward to every single tutoring session and I don’t know if you noticed, but I would throw in some topics that had nothing to do with what I was teaching you that day just to prolong our time together. You are the most unique and interesting person I’ve ever met. You do this thing with your nose when you’re deep in concentration and the image would never leave my mind. You’re an extraordinary person y/n and it would mean a lot to me if you agreed to being my girlfriend.” 

You grinned at his confession before nodding in agreement and reconnecting your lips together. 

“I’m really glad Youngjae forced me to get tutoring.” He snickered before bringing his fingers up to your face and tracing your features. 

“And I’m really glad you suck in marine biology—ow—what? I’m just being honest babe—stop that!” He pulled you on to his lap and placed his head on your shoulder. “Since were a couple now, can I use some pickup lines on you?” You playfully rolled your eyes before sarcastically groaning. 

“Are you an octopus? Because you octopi my thoughts.” 

You hid your face in his neck from embarrassment. “What? You have to be honest y/n, that one was cute. And it’s the truth! Okay fine, how about this one, let’s cuttle—don’t look at me like that, I thought that one was pretty clever. What about whale you be mine—“ 

You brought your hand up to his lips to prevent him from talking. This boy was honestly going to be the death of you. But you couldn’t wait to see what the future held for the two of you. 

“You’re lucky you’re cute because those pick up lines are terrible.” He let out a scoff before picking you up and throwing you over his shoulder. 

“I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that. Let’s go baby, we have some celebrating to do.”

[namfine]

Hi, can I request a nsfw titanic scenario with taehyung? Kinda like the scene in the movie where Jack and Rose first sleep together. Thank yooou

Hello! Gah, I absolutely loved this ask. I took some liberties with the original plot of the movie and switched some stuff around- hope that’s okay and I hope you enjoy. Who knows this may inspire a longer fic in the future? 

-Admin Zesty 

Taehyung traced the line of your shoulder with his fingers. His form was tense and his fingers barely skimmed your skin as his eyes devoured you. It tickled a little, and you let out a breathy exhale, fascinated with the darkening in his gaze.

“What are you doing?” you whispered, careful to keep your voice low. You were in your cabin, your mother and fiance were out, but you were cautious ever the same. The walls had ears on this ship and the cabin maids loved to gossip.

Taehyung had snuck up here to fulfill your artistic request of a portrait of your likeness and  before you knew it here you were, completely nude before him. Exposed to his piercing dark eyes, as he drew your form in his notebook.

You had watched as his eyes took in every detail of your soft skin, your subtle curves. Watched as his pupils darkened when he drew your breasts and filled in the hair between your legs.

You hadn’t meant for this to happen, both the drawing and the feelings but it didn’t matter in the end. None of this mattered except your love for this man, in this moment.

Evidently, he also felt the same because he had abandoned his craft after struggling dutifully through and now knelt before where you lie on the chaise, his brow furrowed, as he traced the contour of your waist to your hip bone.

“You’re beautiful, y’know that?” He murmured his hand slipping down your thigh, careful to stay modestly away from where they met. You shivered at the feeling.

“So I’ve been told,” you quipped and Taehyung met your eyes, a sly smile on his lips. You sat up, straddling his midsection and gripping his suspenders,pulling him forward onto the chaise. He caught himself on his hands, braced on either side of your hips and leaned forward brushing his lips against your own. Taehyung eliminated any self conscious worries you had with a flick of his eyes and a brush of his lips and soon you were melting under his grasp as he deepened the kiss, wetness building between your legs.

It’s funny how things change. How you could go from meekly fulfilling your mother’s wishes of marrying that reproachful man and being shipped across the world on a meager cruise liner to locking lips with a street urchin known as the Prince of the Third Class but you wouldn’t have it any other way. You had known, from the second you saw him on that deck that he was destined for you as much as you were for him. He had eagerly shown you his life by exploring the underground of the ship and late night dances  even though your life had rejected him. He had earned  your loyalty and your loyalty knew no bounds.

Taehyung’s kisses were desperate now. He was pressed against you, his clothed cock pressed against your slick core and you could feel how ready he worked up he was for you, long past using his arms to hold himself up as he wrapped himself in your embrace.

“Tae. . . Tae-” you panted, breaking the kiss to cup his face and stare deeply into his eyes. “I want you, Tae. All of you.”

He looked at you, his eyes wide with shock, his hair mussed. “What? Here?”

You nodded.

“But, your mother? Cal?”

“They won’t be back for hours yet, they’ve gone to watch the opera.” And frankly, you didn’t care. You had lost your virginity years back and regretted not saving it for someone special. Your first time had been unremarkable and if you were going to be forced to spend the rest of your life with Cal, the least you could do was experience love and passion for once in your life. “Please, Tae, it might be our only chance.” You had three days left until you made port in New York City.

He looked at you, face flushed, lashes long before nodding slowly. “I want to. . . it’s just. . .” He paused, looking away from you and biting his bottom lip. You resisted the urge to pull it into your mouth instead. “I’ve never. . . uh. . . I’ve never . . . had sex.” He said the last word so quietly that you weren’t sure you’d heard him right.

“Really?” you asked, brushing his hair from his face and cupping his cheeks to force him to look at you. He exuded such an air of confidence and sexual energy you had assumed. . .

He nodded, clearly embarrassed.

“Oh, god, Taehyung that doesn’t matter at all,” you smiled pulling him closer. “I’ll show you what to do, really, don’t worry. We don’t have to, though, if you don’t-”

He shook his head vigorously, “Oh no, don’t get me wrong. I want to. Very badly.”

Judging by the pressure you felt in his pants against your center, you figured that was a very true statement indeed.

You pulled him in for another kiss. “Okay, let me teach you how to do it then, pretty boy.” You tugged on his shirt, helping him pull it over his head before snaking the belt off his pants. As he stood to remove them you smiled and beckoned him closer, laying back on the lounge. Taehyung straddled you, his legs on either side of your hips before he leaned down to attach himself to your neck, nipping softly at the skin while he used a hand to grope your breast, rolling the nipple roughly against his calloused fingers. You mewled at the sensation.

“What are you nervous about,” you gasped. “You seem to know exactly what you’re doing.”

You felt him smile against your neck before his mouth slid down to nip and suck marks into your collarbone. You would have to remember to wear a scarf tomorrow lest Cal found out you were unfaithful. “I said I was a virgin,” he whispered before taking the nipple of another breast into his warm mouth. “Not a saint.”

You chuckled at that as you writhed under his touch. He lifted one of his legs and placed it between your thighs and your legs instinctively closed around it, holding him there. Taehyung let out a guttural groan as his thigh felt how wet and ready you were for him and you could see his cock stiffen beneath his underwear.

You grabbed one of his hands pulling it down to your cunt and Taehyung’s eyes widened. “What?” you whispered, pressing his fingers against your clit. “She doesn’t bite. Just, I need you to touch me here first, before we go any further.”

“Why?” Taehyung asked as he moved his fingers in a circular motion. You moaned and he let out a boxy grin, feeling rather proud of himself.

“It helps get me ready,” you panted, trying to keep the neediness out of your voice as Taehyung increased the pressure in his fingers ever so slightly. “Otherwise, it could hurt me when you go in.”

“It hurts?” he asked.

“Only the girls,” you replied. “And only if they aren’t fully worked up.”

Taehyung increased his tempo, as if trying to guarantee you would be really worked up.

He was succeeding.

You groaned again as you felt the familiar coil in your lower belly, a sure sign of impending orgarm and you squeezed your legs tighter against his thigh, his hand moving at a rapid pace. Taehyung took his other hand and inserted one finger, then two, into your sloppy cunt and you arched your back.

“Quick learner,” you panted. “Oh God, Tae, please don’t stop, I’m close, I’m so close.”

“You look so fuckin’ hot right now,” he answered, gently curling his fingers inside of you and sliding them in and out. The pressure was growing to be unbearable and you rolled your hips into his hand, searching to increase the friction. Taehyung increased the pace of the fingers sliding in and out of you and pressed a tad bit harder on your clit and it was enough to throw you over the edge.

Your body convulsed with the orgasm and Taehyung managed to pull out his fingers but continued working your clit until you were finished. Spent, your body relaxed and you looked up to find a very proud Taehyung grinning down on you.

“Did I do well?” he asked, knowing perfectly well that he did.

You nodded before sitting up and gripping his hips, pulling his underwear down to let his cock spring free. It was fully hard, probably from all the noise you were making, and already dripping with precum. You leaned forward to press a gentle kiss to the tip but Taehyung gripped your hair, stopping you before you could do more.

“Maybe we should do that part later, I’m afraid I won’t last long if you play around,” he confessed and you grinned up at him. Time for the main attraction, then.

You pulled him down over you as you leaned back onto the lounge. Taehyung used one hand to hold himself up above you and the other to line himself up at your entrance. You could feel him as he pushed himself against your entrance, a series of breathy moans escaping his lips as he felt you wrap around him for the first time.

“Am I hurting you?” He asked, as he continued to push in.

“No,” you whispered, fascinated with the look of pure bliss overcoming his face as he experienced the feeling for the first time.

“Good,” he responded. “Because I think this is the most amazing thing I have ever felt in my whole life.”

You grinned as you felt him bottom out and for a minute, he just stayed there, letting the feeling of your tight core wrapped around him overwhelm his senses.

“Taehyung,” you whispered. “If you think that’s amazing, wait until you move.”

He looked down at you as you felt him pull out slightly and push back in. His gaze changed and you were pretty sure his eyes were going to roll back in his head as he continued the motion, each time becoming more bold by the movements.

“God, I don’t think I’m going to last long,” he moaned, his hips slowly increasing the pace as he rolled into you. You clenched your walls around him and he growled, his eyes squeezing shut. “Definitely not if you do that.”

You wrapped your legs around his waist, giving him deeper access as he struggled to maintain the tempo. Ultimately his body betrayed him and he began to pound into you, his balls colliding against your ass to produce a guttural slapping sound that you hoped the maids couldn’t hear. But honestly, who gave a fuck? A large shake reverberated in the ship but neither of you paid it any mind as Taehyung slammed into you.

Taehyung began to murmur all sorts of dirty, beautiful things about how he wished he could disappear forever inside you and how you were the most wonderful creature he’d ever seen as he grew closer and closer to his climax. You urged him on with little gasps and breathy moans until he thrust himself harshly into you for the last time, holding himself as deeply into you as he could,  groaning loudly as he spilled himself inside of you. His body slumped down onto your own and he turned, pressing his forehead against your own, his eyes slowly opening to connect with yours.

You stayed like that for a moment, both of you reveling in the contact of one another’s bodies and the strong connection you had formed before he slowly pulled out of you with a sickening pop.

“I’m so sorry, I uh-” Taehyung stammered.

“It’s fine,” you smiled at him, leaning forward to kiss his temple. “I have things that will ensure nothing comes from this.”

He nodded and captured your lips on his own.

An alarm blared across the ship causing you both to jump. The loud speaker in your room activated and three harsh beeps signaled before a man’s voice came on:

“Greetings, passengers. I regret to inform you that as of now 11:45pm, the RMS Titanic has been irreparably damaged and we will all need to abandon ship. This is not a drill. Please report to your designated lifeboat stations. I repeat, the ship has been irreparably damaged, please report to your designated lifeboat stations. This is not a drill.”

[writingsofmyimagination]

Believer

Yoo Kihyun x Reader

Rating:18+

Summary: Honestly the video and the Believer cover killed me so enjoy some PWP based around it! 

Warnings: Shameless PWP (Slight BDSM themes (Dom Kihyun OFC), nothing to extreme - Toys, edging, denial, over-stimulation)

On editing actually decided I didn’t like this but it’s all done now :P

//

The music was throbbing through your ear pods, the bass unconsciously in sync with your steps up the stairs. The bass which you hoped would also drown out the throb between your legs. The throb which had been damn near constant for days. Literally.

Yoo fucking Kihyun.

//

It’s been about a week since he released the cover of Imagine Dragons Believer. It’s been a week since you made the HUGE mistake of telling him it drove you mad watching him feel himself through the music like that. Kihyun wasn’t due at your place until tomorrow but you were too desperate and sought to tempt fate.

-So what did you think?”-16:03

-You hit it right out of the park obviously! -

-Yeah?-

-Yeah it was amazing. I’d also be lying if I said It didn’t make me want to fuck you so bad right now-

-And what a shame you won’t be seeing me for a week :P-

You pictured the smug first that would have been plastered on his face. Stroking his already inflated ego always put you first class to tortureville.

-What can we do to help my princess get through the week then?- he’d added

-Come over or leave me alone- you’d offered as the lemon green tea doused your throat while smothered in your blankets on your sofa.

-It’s going to be more fun because I’m doing neither…-

Before you’d even finished reading the message you knew whatever you were going to get was THAT Kihyun. The Kihyun that totally consumed. The Kihyun that was so in control you’d do anything he asked because the alternative was much worse. Even if he wasn’t there. You’d rubbed your thighs together, tongue wetting your lips.

-…You’re going to touch yourself for me. Get yourself all worked up for me and I want you to show me –

You read those words in the way his devilish lips would have whispered if he were there. You’d sat up eagerly before replying.

-Want me to cum for you?-

- Definitely not! that’s reserved for me –

God if he could the pout on your face you’d be straight over the table ass out counting how many strikes to your ass you were going to get

-You fucking serious? I’m not seeing you for daaayyyss – You shot back accompanied with an army of sad faces.

-I never specified who it was going to be most fun for. But for that attitude you’re going to do it every day for me. Make sure you record your frustrated whines at the end. I want to hear how desperate you get.-

You cursed yourself and him a thousand times as you took yourself to the bedroom.

-I know you’re a good girl and you’ll do what your told-

You refused to reply and sent the videos to him.

//

Today was day six, to say you were irritable was an understatement. You’d not sent anything to him today. Tempting fate.

Jooheon was the one to let you into the dorm. Apparently catching him mid food prep; a spatula gripped in his free hand. His movements stopped dead. Eyes grew wide as his brain fought to find something he’d likely forgotten.

“Nothing was planned, chill. This is a surprise Kihyun when he gets in kind of thing” His shoulders dropped.

“Thank god my brain just panicked I’d not put enough food in. On that note though have you eaten? Want me to make you something?

“No thanks. But I do have a small favour to ask though” eyes on the floor observing the converse slip past your heels.

“Sure what’s up?” You took a quick gauge of the room. Minhyuk gave you a quick soft smile and nod before his eyes flew back to the large plasma screen to focus on holding his lead against Hyungwon in whatever overwatch thing was going on. Hyungwon’s eyes briefly acknowledged you but he was too busy squealing and wincing.

“Can you guys make yourself scarce for like ten minutes when he gets back pllleeeaaassseee”

You were responded with a blank, processing look on his face. Changkyun ending up startling Jooheon as he looped his arms round his neck. You don’t know what it is about him but this guy always knows when you’re up to no good. It’s like he knows you’ve got your lacy lingerie set with suspenders on underneath you red and black polka dot dress as well.

“I’ve got this, don’t worry” he stated winking in your direction. You could only roll your eyes amused, bringing your hands into a prayer to him.

“Guys! Let’s go! None of us wanna see when Ki gets surprised” The boys on the sofa fumbled up grabbing their crinkling packets of crisps wordlessly agreeing with Changkyun.

“Thank you soooo much guys, love you” you called after them as they disappeared into their rooms. You checked your phone, you had around ten minutes until Kihyun would be home from the studio. The artificial light of the teardrop lighting had become more prominent as the evening sun descended beneath the blocky skyline of Seoul; purple pastels separated by an orange hue.

You unhooked each button down the front of your dress. You boosted yourself up using the bar style stools to hoist you up to sitting on the marble breakfast island. You were not leaving until you got what you needed tonight and that was absolute in your mind.

It took a few long minutes for the harsh coolness of the marble to regulate to the body temperature of your behind. Phone in your hand aimlessly scrolling through your feed until Ki’s face bubble over took the screen.

“Can I help you” you immediately chimed

“Hey baby, yes you can I’m just getting ho...

His phone barely gripped in his hands. Eyes fixed on the shock on his kitchen side. The words he was going to speak completely strangled out in his throat. He was met with your silence. The misbehaviour screaming in your eyes, lip between your teeth.

“Where are the others?” his words were hesitant, eyes rushing around the room multiple times. He might be … but he was damn private when it came to you; he would not have any of the boys SEE you as you were now. Hear you, I mean he made it a damn point to have you crying him name so they could hear sometimes.

“Making themselves scarce for ten minutes so I can surprise you”

“Yeah?” His bag dropped at his feet, he’d snaked his was over to you zoning in to only you. His fingertips gentle in their dance up your thighs now either side of him.

“Well consider me surprised” he smirked through a kiss.

“Off!” He tapped at your thigh.

The second your feet found stability on the floor, you’d been spun. Stomach pressed to the cold side by a hand at your mid back, other hand trailing upwards in between your legs.

The frustrated exhale swept passed your lips dragging the corner of his up when his hands skipped out at the apex of your thighs gripping at your hips instead.

“Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing princess” his hand slid further up your back to grip into your hair and tug.

“Teasing me into giving you what you want. You still have one more video to make before you get anything from me. So if I were you I’d go to my room put on your collar and wait for me” He pressed a kiss at your shoulder that lingered through the goose bumps. Your bodies moulded together in a final heated kiss before you waltzed off to the bedroom.

Kihyun’s stare held you in permanent unseen restraints. He’d shoved his arm chair to the bottom of the bed, and plonked himself down legs splayed. The top three buttons of his shirt undone hand cradling a camera lense, eagerly waiting in your direction.

Kihyun wasn’t satisfied with just the collar, he’d clipped a metal bar to the O-ring of your collar. Matching cuffs had been strapped to your wrists and clipped onto the end of the bar running vertically down your body. There was some leeway with the chains from your cuffs; not much but enough your hands could dip between your legs.

//

“You’re so beautiful. God it’s hard for me not just to come and fuck you like that” he cooed. The pulsing of the recording red light blurring in your vision as your eyes rolled back.

“Ki..hyun please” You whimpered, nerves igniting at the thought of him giving in to you finally.

“Dinner be ready in 5 guys” Jooheon’s voice echoed through the dorm.

“That’s enough baby. Now I need that mouth of yours before we can leave this room. KNEES!”

You were not going to refuse that tone.

His finger licked under your chin angling it upwards. The camera still gripped in his hand, lens momentarily facing away. He stole a sweet kiss, his lips plump and full against yours.

“I really missed you baby, please tell me you’re staying tonight” the sucrose heavy wrapped in his words, the caramelised glint in his blown-out pupils dancing.

“Mmmhmm” you nodded innocent, despite him being hard in front of your face. His eyes had melted to a softer chocolate fondue.

“Good, you’ll be too tired to leave when I’m finished with you”

“Now show me how much I made you want me”

He decided to keep the camera off, there is no way his hands could have maintained any type of composure. His hands were tightly balled fists in your hair. The deep breathless moans seeping past his pursed lips only kept your core vibrating furiously

//

There were many knowing smirky looks while the boy ate. Every time you pressed your thighs together that bit tighter. Every time he purposely had his hand just that tiny bit too high on your thigh. Every time he whispered to you how bad he needed to feel how wet you were and how he could make It worse. Inside your core was screaming but you physically responded backhanding him wherever you could reach. Obviously, the boys joked and scolded you; this only had Kihyun erupting into more giggles knowing full well you couldn’t defend yourself and say why.

Asshole

With that said you couldn’t quite call yourself the innocent party; sitting on his lap; minutely gyrating your hips earned you many harsh sly squeezes and warning stares.

With the bedroom door finally shut, it took Kihyun mere seconds to rid you of his white tee and joggers. You were already whimpering, desperate putty in his hands.

“Think you’ve waited long enough for me?” Kihyun cooed as you melted underneath his sweltering presence into the mattress.

“See how much longer you can wait” he shot in before you could answer. His hands not reaching you once, they stayed firmly either side of you; only his lips and nose grazed your skin. He knew you disapproved by the way you shifted on the sheets, his lips only curled up into a smirk on your chest before taking a firm bite. The sting had you squirming under him, at least the blossoming red will be coverable with clothes

Makes a change

The tip of his nose traced down your stomach in lazy patterns, every warm breathe fanning a new wave of goose bumps.

“Ki…please!” The nips and breaths on your thigh became way too overwhelming.

“Sorry princess” His head hovered over your core lowing air. You shuddered with an irritated groan.

“Sensitive, are we? A week of not being able to cum. Too much for you when you know I’m here Dying to fuck you?”

“Do you even have to ask” you breathed exasperated. Kihyun’s teasing was merciless at the best of times. He’d always have a flurry of cursing thrown his way.

“Now now, don’t make me keep you waiting any longer” blowing again, your body tensed holding on to every bit of sanity it could muster.

“Say please once more and I promise I’ll let you cum…”

Jesus Christ

“On one condition”

“Ugghh anything!” You would have sold your soul at this point. Your complaint caused a light laugh as he looked up from between your legs.

“I get to hear cry out my name? Your videos have drove me crazy this week, I want you so fucked out”

In his pause waiting for you to respond he stripped himself of his shirt. Finally. He necked half a glass of water before dipping back down between your legs. Eyes completely absorbing every ripple of his biceps and shoulder muscles until he’d positioned himself. With the guys preparing for a comeback he was at the gym more and no matter what he did most of the tone ended up being held in his shoulders and after a week of frustration you were entranced to say the least.

Your vision knocked off kilter.

“Shit!” You’d neglected to notice the amount of ice Kihyun had purposely put in his glass. Breathe was swiftly hijack from your chest. The ball of his metal tongue bar still ice cold pressed to your clit had your knuckles brimming white in the sheets, air forcing out through pursed lips. The fatal concoction of the cooled metal and the warmth of his mouth kicking the volume of your shocked moans to way too audible.

“Fuck you sound sexy but you’ve got to be quieter than that, I don’t want to gag you” He bobbed up gulping another mouthful, you could swear you heard even more crunching on ice. Wrists growing tighter in preparation.

//

“Is that good baby? Need to cum yet?”

As if your whines and writhing didn’t tell him this.

“Beg for it and you can have it” he cooed, chin glistening with you. Lips making there way up to yours at an agonisingly slow pace. Each hot kiss strong, liquidated with need. He found the taste between your thigh all too hard to pull himself away from.

“Beg” he asked again through a kiss you struggled to not cry through.

“Kihy…un please, I need you, jesus..Ki…please” whining with a fervent urgency.

“Oh I know you can do better than that princess” he goaded fingers hovering over the desperate core moments from sending those shockwaves you so badly needed.

“Fuck I swear… please let me cum, I’ve needed you so bad, please I’ve been craving your cock all week. Give it to me…I can’t…”

“Better, oh you know I’ll give it to you baby, but you can give this to me first” Your back arched to a perfect crescent, feeling his fingers stroke the front of your walls, that precious velvet goldmine.

Your neck peaked in front of him head rolled back into the sheets. His lips clamping down on you, hot pants fanning a hot breeze across your neck. Palm firm against your core.

“Fu…” your words grew silent. The pressure remaining firm sending longed out waves as the aftershocks started throbbing through your nerves. A growl rolled around his throat, his hips rolling against nothing. He was starting to feel desperate, aching for you.

“God I’ve never needed you so fucking much” he panted into your neck. Tracing his fingers through the mess he’d created. His bottom lip disappeared between his teeth; dangerous eyes ravenous for more of you. Your body still recalibrating back down to the earth gave him no response.

“Are you still going to be a good girl for me a few more times?”

“Mmm I wanna be” you shuffled pressure at his hips, his knee pressed against your core allowing you to circle your hips against him. Your hands raced to his belt, fumbling the buckles undone. You needed him out of those tight jeans.

“Needy much” he teased, a small grunt of relief when the tight denim was dropped to the floor. He climbed back on the bed climbing past you to sit against the backboard. Rolling on your front to follow his presence.

“Come and sit on my thigh baby girl” A small pout formed on your lips.

“You think I’d give you my cock that easy huh? Not until your shaking with tears in your eyes”

“Mmm” you hummed your throbbing clit now pressed to his thigh. Both hands resting a loose grip either side of his neck.

“And don’t act like this isn’t one of your favourite things. Use me like the desperate princess I’ve made you”

“Do I get to touch you?” Ghost like touches trickled down his chest underneath the rapid barely controlled movements of his breathing. Doe eyes pleading against his blown eyes that struggled to lift from the shine glistening on his leg.

“Only until I tell you to stop” Your hand had already teased beneath the elastic of his boxers.

“Ugh” God the way the veins in his neck twitched as his head rolled back against the wall. Your hips angled onto his tensed thigh. His grip loosened around the wrist of the hand sliding down his shaft when he’d decided on the pace that wouldn’t shove him off the edge.

“You sound just as pretty with my hand round your dick as when you sing” your breathes mixing, perspirated foreheads pressed together both focused eyes down. You’re hips ground harder, hand speed moving in proportion.

“Tch… stop” Kihyun choked gripping at your wrist again. He guided your hand to the meet the other at the back of his neck.

“Focus on you, I wanna watch you fall apart” He pressed at your chest, straightening your back leaning back. His hand trailing your skin, each fingertip curving round your breasts taking every inch of skin to a heightened state.

“Don’t stop princess, you’re so beautiful. Cum for me baby” He shoved his hands down onto your hips pushing down as your head and arms fell forward onto him. He shoved his hand to the back of your head pushing you into a kiss to keep the moans ravaging out of the room as your muscles pulsed sweetly.

“Mmm I could watch that all day” Kihyun cooed kissing you with a sweetness worthy of diabetes. Your head swirling in climatic bliss. He sat up, maneuverer you beneath him. Your hands default dropping to either side of your head.

“Are you joking?” You panted soul packing up good and ready to leave. The devil stood tall in front of you, smirking down, eyes dark.

“I want one more” his fingers drummed against your wand that you were sure you were about to regret leaving at his.

“Now you have a choice, either I can hold it until your begging me to stop or you can?”

“You hold it”

“Pleeasssee” you added.

“Anything for you”

//

The vibrations had you whining, tears pricking at the side of your ears. Sensitivity hijacking every single nerve ending at your core. Kihyun’s head buried in your neck, low moans fanning your neck as your cries only made him strain harder to not buck into you.

“Colour?” Kihyun asked, his weight not allowing you to move, wand still harshly pressed to you. Your muscles drained of energy, the forced convulsions post climax forcing them to run past empty.

“Yel..low” you whimpered. He showed mercy freeing you of stimulation. He thumbed the corner of your eyes, the clear droplets chased its way over his knuckles.

“Had enough of me yet?” he breathed between gentle kisses down your body, a sweet trail of plump lips.

“Mmmm” you hummed not even in response more a noise of waning bliss.

“So you don’t want my cock after all your whining this week?” Eyes shooting open

“I do, Ki…please I’ve needed you soo bad” your body running on pure desperation.

“And just think all because I released a cover video”

“Roll over ass up add bits!” he ordered. You just about pumped enough strength into your muscles to obey.

“Here baby, save your energy” He rolled up a couple of pillows and plumped them under your stomach. The caramel chocolate of his voice melted and gooey.

“I’ll go slow baby”

You knew this was for him as well as you. He thrived on working you up to the point he’d be painfully on edge without even having you. He needed enough left to shove you into bliss once more with him.

Noise was no longer a concern, all you had left was breathless pants and groans.

“I never wanna believe how good you feel” Kihyun managed choking through his words, his hips light in their juts into you. Hips controlled by his hands secured at your hips, your head rolling hard into the mattress. Colour draining from your knuckles attempting to blend into the white sheets scrunched around them. The slow ascent torturous as it was sweet.

“Baby….” You choked.

“Mmm”

“Please go faster” you whined, the slow build up in your muscles was aching every fibre past the point you could cope.

“Why’s that princess?” Kihyun slowed his hips the demon.

“Want to…cum…please”

“You know you can’t be quiet when I fuck you like that” …

“Don’t…care…gag me” you managing panting through pursed lips. His hips stuttered in approval, a growl vibrating in his throat.

“Well… how can I refuse”

“Ugh” you both groaned in unison, disapproving of the emptiness you both felt.

Silicone ball consuming the inside of your mouth, leather taut across your cheek.

“Look at me baby” You were cross legged pillows hugged at your chest. Longing glazed over eyes looking up at him, hair fallen over your face. The red tinted skin around your eyes proof of your complete undoing.

“You are soo pretty like this, my fucked out good girl… Get back with your ass up” Thank god you were gagged. The now muffled squeal would have certainly drawn attention from the dorm. He spared no energy going easy on you, his hips snapping into you.

“Is this what you wanted? …Want you to cum with me, Okay!” Your nod into the mattress was not seen, your okay signal with your hands was. Your right hand flew to the side of his thigh, red crescents soon dented in his skin.

“Close baby?” You were falling apart quicker than hips could keep up.

“Fuck, keep doing that” hips slowing when you pulsed your walls around him.

“Mmm like that… okay…baby ready?” He didn’t need your hand signal, your body stiffened. Your concentration holding on to his ever-becoming sporadic hip thrusts. You waited for his delectable deep as fuck low groan and his body to still before you let the last wave of muscle spasms ravage your muscles of every last contraction. Long drawn out pulses drawing more water to your eyes, teeth gripping harder on the rubber.

The perspiration suddenly felt warmer under his palm curving round your behind, squeezing harshly. He half collapsed, more of his skin fusing across your back for a beat before completely falling onto the bed. You fell beside him, the ability to formulate words was still beyond you. Kihyun rolled to face you snuggling a kiss into your neck.

“Want a bath beautiful?” asking while stroking the peak curve of your hips where his fingers had been planted. As the oxytocin fled your system the soreness from the bruises that would surely blossom over the next few days nudged your skin.

“I’ve still got a couple of your fave bath bombs, and I’ll bring you some Vodka aaannnnnnd I’ll maybe even make you breakfast in the morning”

“Babe I’m going to need dinner by the time my body will work enough to leave the bed” you whined dramatically.

“But yes, love yooouu” you added, ridiculous accomplished smirk wreaking havoc on his face as the buckle of his belt secure the trouser back round his hips.

[tsarisfanfiction]

Silent VII

Fandom: Thunderbirds Rating: Teen Genre: Hurt/Comfort/Angst Characters: Jeff Tracy, Scott Tracy, Grandma Tracy, Alan Tracy

Seventh and final part of my response to @gumnut-logic‘s SensorySunday: Taste challenge. Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

This fic’s been a bit of an experiment, perhaps more so than the others, but I’ve still greatly enjoyed writing it and I hope you’re enjoyed reading it, too.  I’ll be back with the fifth and final sense tomorrow, so see you then!

His return to Earth was nothing like the previous times.  Triumph, shared laughter and in jokes with his best friend in the universe (barring the one he had married, of course) were barely a distant memory as the space shuttle docked and Jeff stumbled out of it with all the grace of a fawn on ice.

There was no-one to greet him.  Another first, and for his final return from space, it was by far his worst. Lucille always knew when he was going to be home, and always made sure to be there – with their sons in tow if she could wrangle it.  She wasn’t here this time, but he already knew that.  His time on Alfie had been slashed short by a message trickled through the cosmos until it reached him.

Your wife’s dead.

Three words.  Three horrible, horrible words.  It was lucky that Lee had been there with him, for once the voice of reason that held him back from trying to space walk the whole way back to Earth himself.  Most likely without his helmet, a forgotten piece of necessary equipment in the shock. Jeff had ended up sobbing in his friend’s arms for hours when it had properly sunk in.

Lucille was dead.  His beautiful wife, the mother of his five precious sons, the most brilliant star he’d ever seen.  Avalanche.  Messages from Earth to the Moon tended to be direct and to the point.  Less to get lost in translation that way, although Jeff wished it was just a mistranslation.

Your wife’s dead. Avalanche.  Sons alive.

It was the last two words that had stopped him from walking outside without his helmet, regardless of Lee’s attempts to stop him.  His boys, his five wonderful boys, had had their mother torn from them.  Who was with them?  Who was stopping Scott from playing parent more than he already did while their father was off gallivanting around in space?  He’d promised Lucille this was the last time, that he was ready to settle down on Earth so that Alan, at least, could grow up with both his parents always around.  She’d never begrudged him his adventures, but one son, she’d demanded.  One son, he would watch grow up day by day, and not a couple of months a year.

So much for any of their sons growing up with both parents.  At the sign that he’d be home indefinitely, the world had decided to strip their mother from them, instead.  His poor, poor boys.

Were they injured?  Alive left so much potential.  Had they been caught in the avalanche as well?  Swept down the mountainside and jumbled all the way into a hospital?

When had it happened? There was no date, no way of knowing how quickly he’d been informed – and it had been three weeks since the message got through before they could launch a shuttle to bring him home.

Thankfully, his superiors didn’t bother with the usual tedium of a debrief when he staggered into Earth and one G gravity again.  They held him back only long enough for the mandatory physical assessment – “don’t terrify your kids by collapsing on them, Tracy,” – and hacked through all of the red tape until he was free to go, and then personally ensured he made it to his front door.

His mother’s car was on the drive.  An old thing he was sure had been ancient when she’d first acquired it, long before Jeff had ever met Lucille, it gave him the breath of air he needed. Mom was here.  His boys were alright.  They had to be – she’d never leave any of them alone in a hospital. Whatever had happened, his sons hadn’t been abandoned.

What was the etiquette for arriving home after months away?  Did he open the door and stroll straight in, or should he knock and announce his presence?  It had never been a concern for him before, with Lucille always by his side when he came home, gripping his elbow as though he’d fall over if she didn’t personally hold him up.

Then again, he had, the first time.

He felt like he might again, and it was that thought that had him pushing the door open and stumbling through.

“Mom?” he called.  The door was unlocked – she was definitely in. What day was it?  It was early afternoon, but were the boys at school or was it a weekend?

“Dad?”

Well, that answered that question.  He stumbled into the sitting room to meet startled blue eyes, inherited from the boy’s grandmother.  Scott was sat on the couch, somewhat stiffly, with his laptop on his lap and headphones discarded carelessly on the cushions.

“Scott!”  Unsteady on his feet, it was more of a controlled collapse than anything else onto the couch beside him, pulling his eldest into his arms.  There was no protest, no squawk that he was too old for that – or even that his laptop had been dislodged by the sudden embrace.  All the signs of a rebellious teenager starting to find his own place in the world that had been showing just before he’d left were gone, leaving behind a child.

“Dad,” Scott gasped into his crumpled shirt, hands balling into fists against his back as he returned the embrace almost as fiercely.  “D-Dad.”

“I’m here,” he mumbled, resting his cheek on top of his son’s head and clutching him tightly, hearing quiet, desperate gasps.  “Dad’s home.” There were tears in his eyes, prickling uncomfortably and spilling down his cheeks.  He would have been embarrassed, normally, but Scott was sobbing into his chest as well, and they’d both lost someone they loved more than life itself.

He couldn’t help but notice, however, that the commotion they were making failed to draw any more young boys – or their grandmother – to the room.  His mother hadn’t responded to his call, either.

“Where are your brothers?” he asked Scott after a moment.  “And your grandmother?”

Scott drew back slowly, and Jeff loosened his hold enough that they could face each other properly, but didn’t let go entirely.  His eldest didn’t fight for his freedom, and indeed still had his shirt in his fists.

“School,” he said.  “It’s Wednesday, Dad.  Grandma’s collecting Alan from playgroup.”

“I see,” he sighed, moving to pull him closer again before a thought struck him.

“If it’s a Wednesday, why aren’t you at school?”

Scott promptly buried his head in his shirt again, clinging to him with a fervour that unmistakably said I don’t want to talk about it.

Jeff let him keep his silence, instead shifting around until he had his eldest son firmly situated in his lap.  Fourteen or not, he was still his son, and if he was out of school – no doubt his grandmother’s call – then there was something very wrong.  Jeff only hoped it was the obvious, and not something else on top of Lucille’s death.  For his part, Scott didn’t protest to being treated like a much younger child; if anything he clung even tighter.

The door opened and he turned his head to see his mother walking in, a small blond toddler with blue eyes at her heels.  Little Alan had grown up so fast, just like all of his brothers before him.

“Jeff!”  Gentle hands cupped his face, before pulling him – and consequently, the son on his lap – into an embrace.  “Oh, Jeff.”

“Mom,” he choked out, vaguely noticing Scott wriggling free and slipping away.  “Mom, I-”

She hushed him, stroking his hair as he tried and failed to stop more tears.  He didn’t want to break down in front of two of his sons, but the dam had been once again breached and much like Scott had been sobbing into his chest minutes earlier, he sobbed into his mother’s shoulder.

There were no platitudes she could offer him, nor did she try.  The relief at seeing two of his sons, and the implication that the other three were also unharmed, only went so far in easing the pain at Lucille’s loss.

Knowing that two of his sons were in the room helped him to regain control, if not composure, however.  They needed him to be strong for them, so with some effort he pulled away from his mother and turned around to find that Scott had sat down on the floor next to Alan and was distracting him with a toy car.

“Scott didn’t say why he’s not at school,” he commented quietly, watching the pair of them.  “Did something happen?”

His mother gave an unhappy sigh that immediately concerned him.

“I pulled him from campus classes for the time being,” she said.  “He’s been enrolled in the online classes instead.”  Jeff glanced over at the ignored laptop, tilted on its side, and saw something that looked like math.

“Why?”

“It took me five days to get here,” she confessed quietly, and Jeff swallowed.  His boys had been alone for five days.  He knew them well enough to know that Scott would have stepped up as parent, but he shouldn’t have had to.  Not at fourteen.  “A severe snow storm had me trapped, and when I finally got here I found out that Scott’s so-called friends-” she all but sneered the word “-had taken offence to him quitting the basketball team and instead of bothering to find out why, decided the mature thing to do was to take the aggressive approach.”

“What?”  The word got strangled in his throat and came out as an enraged hoarse whisper rather than the shout it meant to be.  It was still enough to catch Scott’s attention, although when the teenager realised they were looking at him he quickly turned his gaze back to Alan, who was making rocket noises to accompany his car.  “He was being bullied?  Straight after Luci-”

His voice choked up completely.

“I took the matter up with the principle,” she assured him.  “All four boys responsible have been suspended and put on community service for a month.  Mr Atkins made it clear that he takes bullying very seriously.”  She sighed again, but there was an angry glint behind her purple glasses.  “Scott is also housebound on doctor’s orders for at least another month.”

Jeff’s eyes widened and he focused on his son again, still distracting Alan even though it was clear he was listening to their conversation.  He’d thought his sons had escaped injury, but was that not the case? How about the other three?

He asked as such, and got a sad smile.

“None of them were hurt in the avalanche,” she promised him.  “They all walked away from that physically fine, if very shaken.  No, it’s the fault of those horrible boys.  Most of the bruising has faded, but he still has cracked ribs and mild internal bruising from their attacks.”

Jeff couldn’t listen to anything more, not then.  He left his mother on the couch and stumbled down to the floor with his sons.  Alan regarded him with wide eyes before scrambling into his lap, rocket-noise car abandoned, in search of a big hug, which Jeff was more than happy to provide.

Next to him, Scott was rigid again, and Jeff remembered enough of his own adventures with broken ribs to recognise the accompanying discomfort.  He remembered the crushing hug he’d given the boy when he’d first seen him, and winced. Scott hadn’t made any attempt to stop him – had seemed desperate for the physical contact – but he must have been hurting.

“I’m proud of you,” he said, freeing one arm from Alan to carefully loop it around his eldest’s shoulders.  “I’m sure you can call school a wrap for today.”  Scott still didn’t meet his eyes, but leaned into his touch again.

“Thanks, Dad,” he mumbled.

“Dad!” Alan echoed, all toothy grin.

“Dad!” was the same call he got two hours later, when his final three boys came home and wasted no time in demanding a group hug, all of them noticeably mindful of Scott.

Dad.  He still had that.  His wife might be gone from the mortal plane – although he had no doubts that she’d be watching them from the stars – but he still had his sons, and he tightened his hold on all five of them.

As long as he had them, he could keep going.

Fin

[celestialnocturnes]

a day in a woman’s life

trigger warning: sexual abuse

as if the vexing sound of the alarm clock separating you from the sweet peace of sleep wasn’t enough, you find yourself waking up to a disgusting pool of red stain on your bed. ah, the monthly visitor has come, you whisper disappointedly. the day’s off already off to a bad start and you can’t even get up because of your excruciating cramps.

you must have been used to battling with the monthly enemy that after a few seconds of struggle, you found yourself walking towards the bathroom now ready to start the day. as you undress yourself and stare at your reflection, your imperfections begin to make fun of you. those stretch marks, those hairy armpits, those belly fats, and oh god that obnoxious figure. times are different now. magazines tell you to embrace your flaws and love your body. say, was it supposed to be revolutionary? what if i don’t love my body, you ask? does that make me any less of a person, of a woman? the reflection doesn’t answer back. then again, they’re all just a bunch of hypocrites.

the bath seemed to freshen up your perspective, until you see that there’s only two pieces of sanitary napkin left on your drawer. make a mental note to stop by the convenience store to buy a pack, you said. it’s not much of an expense, but taking into consideration all the money you’ve spent for buying those sanitary napkins the moment you first bled until your menopause, that sums up to a lot. the government should follow scotland’s initiative of giving free period products to women, but hey what about the pink tax that contributes to their illicit profits? you scoff at the thought as you put on your underwear.

maybe i should switch to tampon? the thought enters your mind and maybe it is time to consider that. it’s funny, though. corporations would lecture us for minimizing our carbon footprints when they are bigger culprits than we are. oh well, that’s a complaint for another time.

the weather was scorching hot, so you opted for a light wear. the combination is as follows: shorts dark enough to mask possible leakages, a cropped top that boosted your confidence when you tried it on the cramped fitting room, and white sneakers that unfailingly match any outfit. if you were staying at home right now, your parents would definitely ridicule you for wearing that “slutty” outfit. good thing you’re staying on a dormitory, otherwise you’d hear your mom’s endless lectures on how the outside is brimming with lustful and dangerous men.

she wasn’t wrong, though.

as you were on your way to the jeepney terminal, men along the streets feasted on the sight of your legs. to shorten the agony, you quickened your pace and eventually turned it into a sprint. it was an exercise grounded on the wrong motivation, but at least you caught the jeep before it got full.

that ride wasn’t a safe haven, you realize.

it was the same thing again. oh what you would do to avoid their frightening gaze. i should’ve brought a shawl, or a jacket you said to yourself. but come on, it’s not sensible to bring those items on a weather like this. what do you expect, though? being a woman comes a seemingly infinite number of precautionary measures.

at last, you arrived on time for your class. your friend would gossip about her new crush and both of you would look at his pictures. he’s kind of cute. oh, when would you have a crush, you thought. good thing the prof arrived before you dwell on that pointless musing. it would be nice to see a charming face, though.

the day was going well so far, ignoring the occasional strikes of pain from your cramps. when classes are finally over, you join your friends who seem to be engrossed in a secret conversation. you ask them what was going on and the news terrified you. you’ve heard this sort of thing before, but it’s different when it occurs to someone you truly care about.

apparently, one of your friends has been harassed. she was keeping it for months and finally decided to speak up about it. he physically assaulted her and took advantage of her drunkenness. what’s even worse was that it was done by someone within the campus. the place that was supposed to hone safety for its stakeholders no longer felt like a safe zone. honestly, when will it ever get better?

you’re all curious about the sanction, but realistically speaking, will justice even be served? sooner or later, everyone will forget about this. he might be suspended, sure, but when he comes back, there’s no guarantee that things will magically turn alright. some would probably even dismiss what he’d done for flirting. girls are so overreacting they would say. it’s scary to think that things and comments like that are normal when they are so, so far from that.

heard about what happened. is there anything i can do? you text your friend. she replies that she’s okay and that she needs some time alone. understandable. you would do the same thing too if you were on her shoes.

to take your mind off that heart-crushing news, you decide to watch an episode of a popular sitcom, only to find a main character being “funny” for his countless sexist jokes and borderline creepy attempts to sleep with women. what a shallow take on personality.

you’re done for the day, what with your classes, your social interactions, that news, and your period being fully functional energy drainers. you take a quick dinner and go back to your dorm. once again, you ran as fast as you could the moment you got off the jeep. your mom would be happy to know that you got back to your dormitory on time, because it’s at nighttime when men outside get even worse. what a nightmare being the one to adjust for their indecency as persons.

just when you’re ready to change into comfortable clothes and study your lessons for tomorrow’s classes, you realize two things. you need to wash your stained underwear and bed sheet. plus, you forgot stopping by the convenience store. oh dear, so much for being a woman! 

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happy women’s history month to my fellow women out there! i can’t fathom the strength we hold, but it’s incredible to hold such power isn’t it? too bad we had to endure so many unnecessary things because of this society. i’ve wanted to write an entry on being a woman and inject some of my thoughts on it so i hope this does justice even though it seems like a full rant on having period. anw, let’s smash the patriarchy, one day at a time!