#me having a moment of immaturity between Real Professional Job 1 and Real Professional Job 2

[trek-tracks]

Me: I am a mature adult with a professional job

Also Me:

*snickering while taking a screenshot for posterity*

[silentfcknhill]

FAVORITE SHOWS IN POSTERS

Well, we’re back for another installment of this tagged meme, this time for TV shows! I also stole this from/was indirectly tagged by @jcmorrigan. My taste in shows also differs a bit from my taste in movies, as I tend to like a lot of comedy shows with not as many horror ones. I’m not into shows as much as movies overall, but there are some that I am very passionate about so I picked twenty again. So, here we go for part 2, in order:

1. Avatar: The Last Airbender/The Legend Of Korra (2005-2014)

I'm including these as one show since they take place in the same universe and tell a continuation of the same overall plot. Altogether this is probably the best piece of media to ever exist, including movies. It has so many great characters and villains especially and some of the most epic sequences, charming humor and heartwarming moments ever. I've never met a person who didn't like these shows, even people who normally don't like cartoons. My dad, who is biased against animation? He loved it. My mother? She loved it, watched it with her multiple times. My grandmother? Loved it. My ex-boyfriend? Loved it. My best friend? Loved it. I dare anyone not to, and I'm so glad it's making a resurgence since it's on Netflix for a new generation to enjoy.

2. Black Butler (2008-2014)

I never was big into anime growing up and only really started watching anime when I was like 16 and above, but this is one of the exceptions because holy shit is it ever dark and epic. I'm not sure I'd really recommend it for kids, it's more of a teens and young adults kind of anime and that's probably why it's so good, because it isn't afraid to explore dark and mature topics and do it with all of the intensity and gravitas required to do said topics justice. It has lots of great characters, and the story of demons who make deals with children who have a dark side is fun to watch play out.

3. Seinfeld (1989-1998)

My dad was a huge fan of this show so I watched it growing up since I was a toddler and it became a classic for me. I've watched thw hole show through at least 8 times, and I'll never stop because it never gets old or boring. It's also my only comfort show when I'm having a panic attack because of one time a few years ago when I was having a drug-induced psychosis episode and watching it calmed me down, so now it's like the opposite of a trigger and whenever I'm having an episode or something I watch it to bring me back to reality. For that reason it's more than a show to me, it's a medical treatment and I'm forever grateful to it.

4. The Good Place (2016-2020)

The big four shows made my Michael Schur all made it on this post (The Good Place, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, The Office and Parks And Recreation), either in the main list of the honorable mentions, but this is my personal favorite of the four. It's so funny, quirky, relatable and basically tailor-made to suit my interests. Not only is it an entertaining and wholesome show, but I think watching it helped me come to terms with a lot of things like mortality, ethics, philosophy, religion and my relationships with other people. It gets  alot of different viewpoints across and if you're a very analytical and philosophical person like me you'll probably enjoy seeing it all play out. Not to mention, every single character is 'favorite character' material. It's rare you find a show with no filler characters in the main cast, but I genuinely can't choose who is best.

5. Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013-?)

Another of Michael Schur's shows, this one is just barely under The Good Place and to be honest it was tough to pick my favorite between the two because they're both equally funny. I know it's kind of controversial right now because of the whole law enforcement thing, but I actually think they do a good job of handling social issues in the show and remaining respectful of real-life systemic problems. As for the characters, this is another one of those shows where every single character is gold and I think that tends to be a trend among Schur's shows in general. He produces damn good comedy, and damn good characters. I can't wait to see what they bring next.

6. Rick And Morty (2013-?)

This is unfortunately one of those cases of 'great show, horrible fandom' and for that reason I don't get involved in the fandom even though I love the show. It's a shame because it really is a great show, so funny and, again, such good characters. I think it's a lot more accessible than the fandom likes to claim, so I'm hoping more people will give it a chance and not get put off by the intellectual elitism of the fandom because it does have some of the most entertaining and batshit crazy episodes ever, poking fun of some of the staples of science fiction in media while also poking fun of itself the whole time. Unlike the fandom, the show doesn't take itself seriously and that's enjoyable nowadays.

7. Orange Is The New Black (2013-2019)

While this show is a comedy, it is also a lot of other things and it's probably made me ugly-cry just as many times as it's made me laugh. Well, maybe not as often, but those few scenes (if you've watched the show then you know the ones I'm talking about) made me hysterically sob hard enough to be worth like fifty minor sads. But I didn't even mind because the show is just that good, and it makes you /feel/ something in a real way. Probably because of just how real it gets in terms of telling stories that happen all the time in the real world, sometimes with inevitably tragic endings. But these things do happen every day, and it's important to shine a light on that. It's not just representation for LGBTQ+ but also for POC, the neurodiverse, the poor, and many more. Give it a watch to broaden your perspective!

8. Big Mouth (2017-?)

This is probably the grossest show I've ever seen but by god is it ever funny. Maybe it's because I have an immature sense of humor or something, but I love this show. It definitely won't be everyone's cup of tea and I don't recommend you watch this show with anyone else around because it will get awkward. I think part of its appeal to me is that everyone I talk to who likes it considers it so relatable to their lives growing up but for someone like me who grew up on the autism and asexual spectrum and who was physically an early-bloomer by years, nothing about this show is relatable to me in any way so it makes it all the more crazy and bizarre watching how the people around me must have experienced things. Did y'all really have these experiences with puberty in middle school???

9. Dexter (2006-2013)

I recently heard that this show is coming back for a reboot soon and I'm so excited because this is my absolute favorite drama/thriller show, as evidenced by the fact that it's the highest one on the list so far that isn't a comedy. I love the idea of having a protagonist who is sort of a villain (or at least morally dubious), and the idea of a serial killer who only kills bad people is particularly satisfying for some reason. Maybe because he's the vigilante we all deserve and want in this unjust and evil world of modern times? Idk but the very premise of this show set it up for big things and aside from the ending I think it delivered consistently.

10. Once Upon A Time (2011-2018)

This show took us on some journeys, and you can't deny that. Sure, maybe it didn't always finish what it started and didn't always end in the most satisfying way, but part of its charm is that you didn't care because the experience was just so much fun. They took characters and stories that have been told to death and somehow managed to put a unique and unexpected twist on them, and that alone is admirable. Good twists, good villains, and pretty much every cliffhanger known to man will keep you hooked on binge-watching every episode.

11. RuPaul's Drag Race (2009-?)

A bit different than the other entries on my list in that it's not fiction but a reality competition show, but I couldn't leave Drag Race out because it's just so fucking iconic and perfect. Even when you disagree with the judges or can't stand a certain contestant you'll still be having a good time. It's got the personalities you love to love, the ones you love to hate, and the comedy that's completely meme-able. I mean just how much has this show contributed to pop culture and the internet? More than most of us, henny. I've watched every single season, even the international ones and all of the spinoffs. This show will probably be on for another thirty years when Ru is throwing shade from a hospital bed and I'll still be watching.

12. House (2004-2012)

Some people hate on this show, and I don't get it. I love House. Yes, he's an ass. That's the point. He's supposed to be unlikeable, and that's why I like him. Maybe because I always love the rude, sarcastic, misanthropic jerkass-genius characters for some reason. And I also love procedural shows, so it's a win-win. I also work in the healthcare field so it appeals to me for that reason too, because obviously the whole premise is outlandish which is what makes it funny. Of course it's not realistic for a hospital, so just enjoy the absurdity and don't get too hung up on the details of medical accuracy and professional ethics and you'll be fine.

13. The Office (2005-2013)

The third of Michael Schur's show and the last one that made the main list (sorry Parks And Rec, I love you too but there was just so many good shows to choose from and I saw you last so the nostalgia isn't as strong!) I don't think I need to hype this show up any, it's already a classic and you can't even turn around online without getting hit in the face by a dozen Office memes. You'll have to pry this show and it's relatable characters (especially Michael Scott) from my cold, dead hands.

14. All Hail King Julien/The Penguins Of Madagascar (2008-2017)

Like Avatar/Korra, I also consider this as one show for the sake of this list because it also takes place in the same universe (Madagascar, specifically) and I just couldn't choose one over the other because they're both so perfect. They're funny and I love all the characters (it cut out the weaker links of the Madagascar film series and just focuses on expanding the standout side-characters like King Julien and the penguins). It also delved into some lore, particularly the first show, and even though I didn't also agree with the directions it took (you may have seen me get salty about the ending because I cared too much), I can't deny how much I love it.

15. Bones (2005-2017)

One of the other scarce non-comedy shows on this list, it still has it's funny moments. It's also, like House, another procedural show that involves some medical stuff, but this time on a more scientific and forensic level which is even more interesting. It's nice to see a lead female with Asperger's, too. There's a lot of cop/law enforcement shows where they try to solve crimes, but this one is the best, and I'm saying that as a fan of CSI as well. Don't fight me on this, I'm right. Oh yes, it's corny, it's campy, it's cheesy, but I love every minute of it. Don't watch if you have a weak stomach though.

16. The Simpsons (1989-?)

We all grew up with this show, don't lie. It's been around longer than most people on tumblr have even been alive. Should it have ended seasons ago? Hell yes. But that doesn't take away what the first like 20 or so seasons gave us (there's a lot of argument about when the show jumped the shark, for me it wasn't until much later than the popular consensus). The characters are amazing, but the secret to the show's longevity is that they always return to status quo and there's comfort and nostalgia in that. Bart will still be in 4th grade when you're out there pushing 90. This show is persistent. This show is eternal. This show will outlive us all.

17. Ash Vs. Evil Dead (2015-2018)

Sorely underrated. This show is hilarious, gruesome and campy as hell and I love it. I don't think you necessarily have to watch the Evil Dead movies beforehand in order to get the plot of the show, although it would probably help. In my opinion this show ended way too soon and I'm hoping someday we'll get a comeback because Ash is the reluctant, self-absorbed hero we all need and it's 2020 so at this point there really might actually be a demon-zombie apocalypse and who's gonna save us then if not for the impulsive womanizer with a chainsaw for a hand?

18. Malcolm In The Middle (2000-2006)

Another show I grew up with, I don't think it gets as much credit as it deserves. It has some damn funny episodes and great characters, and it did a lot of the popular sitcom tropes before they were 'cool'. Some other great sitcoms, The Middle in particular, took a lot of influence from this show and it helped pave the way for the future of sitcoms at a time when they were about to make a comeback. If you want a good show about the real experiences of growing up, this is a much more accurate representation of the highs and lows of being an awkward tween from a dysfunctional home.

19. A Series Of Unfortunate Events (2017-2019)

Unlike most people I actually liked the movie version from the early 2000's, and I read the books growing up so I was excited when I saw there was a live action television adaptation of it on Netflix because I felt like they cancelled the movie franchise too soon. I was interested to see how new actors would handle the roles, and I was not disappointed. I wouldn't say I liked either portrayal of the characters better or worse, they both added their own twist to it and this show is a great and loyal adaptation to the books, probably because the author was so heavily involved. He knew just when to stick to the books and when to improve upon what he had done with the benefit of hindsight. This show is basically the books, but remastered.

20. Winx Club (2004-?)

Sort of an odd one out on this list, but I really love this show even as an adult and it may surprise you to learn it is still going on and the most recent season came out last year. They take big breaks sometimes in between seasons, but it's still going strong and in multiple countries. The only thing I don't like about watching this show is all the different and inconsistent dubs since the original show is Italian and each dub only goes for a couple seasons so by the time you get used to one set of voices/names for the characters oyu have to abruptly switch to another, but it's still worth it for the beautiful animation and cool characters (especially the villains!)

Honorable Mentions: 

13 Reasons Why, America's Next Top Model, American Horror Story, Arrested Development, Bates Motel, Battlestar Galactica, Black Mirror, Care Bears, Chernobyl, Courage The Cowardly Dog, Criminal, CSI, Duck Dodgers, Goosebumps, Kenny Vs. Spenny, Kim Possible, Kingdom Hospital, Lazytown, Lost, Making A Murderer, Mayday, Mindhunter, Modern Family, Monster High, Obsession: Dark Desires, Parks And Recreation, Prison Break, Project Runway, Queer As Folk, Queer Eye, Salem, Schitt's Creek, SCTV, Spongebob Squarepants, The Emperor's New School, The Good Doctor, The Haunting Of Hill House/Bly Manor, The Middle, The Pretender, The Walking Dead, The X-Files, Through The Wormhole, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Unsolved Mysteries, Yugioh

Tagging: @bullet-farmer​ and anyone else who wants to!

[lizacstuff]

Hi! What did you think of ep23?I love your in depth thoughts on the episodes. I really enjoyed it, especially the EdSer moments (was smiling like an idiot during the skating scene - when Eda complained about it being hot (girl same), and also that she understood what he said in French omg). I hope the grandmother doesn't turn out to be as evil as everyone is assuming. I guess the one big con was Ayfer. She's gotten more annoying right? That's not just me? But I love me some Aydan!

Hello! Thank you for the kind words. Let's see, I did like the episode, but as I said in another ask I was a bit on edge while watching for a couple of reasons, but they're all Edser related so I'll talk about that when I talk about them at the end. As far as Ayfer is concerned, I FEEL YOU. 

Good grief, woman. Why does she have to be such a harpy? It feels like she complains about absolutely everything. Plus, she's forcing a situation where her beloved niece can't trust or confide in her, and all the girls have to hide Eda's work schedule from her. Look, if Ayfer doesn't want to spend time with Aydan, fine, but her anger towards and disapproval of Eda's job and her relationship with Serkan are completely selfish. She may tell herself she's disapproving for Eda's own good, but come on.

Because, seriously, what does Ayfer think she's protecting Eda from? Serkan is handsome, rich, successful and head over heels in love with Eda. Let's be honest, Eda could do worse. He might be a tad arrogant and controlling, but he's a very good man with a very good heart. Also he tries with Ayfer. I get the connection with Alptekin is upsetting, but Serkan and Aydan have cut him completely out of their lives and neither had anything to do with what happened. I also get that Ayfer was put off by the whole contract thing, but it took two to tango there, and Eda's entire world opened up because of that arrangement.

Maybe that's the problem? 

(more under the cut)

Maybe Ayfer can feel Eda expanding and growing and her world getting much bigger than Ayfer's and it scares her? She thinks she'll lose her, or won't recognize her? Privately, Serkan and Eda have talked about running away together, maybe Ayfer senses that's a possibility? (PRO TIP: Then don't be a negative force they have to get away from!) 

Also what's happening with this Chef Alexander thing? Is he actually going to make an appearance? Is there going to be a romance? I think that would be good, maybe that will salvage Ayfer's character and she'll get distracted and maybe even happy. I did laugh, though, at her her calling Aydan and Seyfi out on their lie about having him on board with their charity scheme. They should know better than to try that. Amateur move, kids!  But I will always applaud their matchmaking efforts when it comes to Eda and Serkan. 

I enjoyed the girls this episode. I like that they don't share Ayfer's concerns about Serkan and are ready to go to the mat for whatever Eda wants. Poor Melo is the worst detective, but she gets points for trying. Also points for picking up what Eda was putting down and skillfully sweeping Balca and her broken heel out of the way. I'd want Fifi for protection as well, girl is badass. I can't tell what this Fifi/Erdem thing is supposed to be.  Does she have a soft spot for him, she must because I don't know why she would give him the time of day otherwise. She's not one we have to worry about not being able to say no. If she wanted to rid herself of his presence, she'd do it. Ceren and Ferit are just kind of... there. I don't dislike it, but I also don't really care. They need something to spice that up.

Which is what we finally got with Engin and Piril! Holy moly, who is her dad!?! Mafia boss? Politician? Wealthy recluse? @alicekepley suggested on another post that maybe it's Aydan's first love. Now that would be interesting. Maybe he turned to a life of crime after being disappointed by Aydan? I am now looking forward to see how this plays out and how it affects them. However, there's one thing that gets me almost every episode. I love Engin and Anil, but he looks at least a decade older than Serkan, Piril, and Selin. So much so that I don't buy they could have gone to school together. This is where I'll have to call on my well honed suspension of disbelief I guess... I'll tell myself he spent a lot of time in the sun and is graying a bit prematurely. 

I did like Engin and Serkan sitting around commiserating about their relationships and hoping things were about to turn around. That's the more equal buddy talk I want to know happens. 

Speaking of Serkan, duuuuuuuuude. You're being hunted, wise up!  I'm really stuck on what he said to Sirius after Eda left his house at the top of the episode. "Don't look at me like that, everything is under control, I know perfectly well what I'm doing, this is my tactic." We know from last episode he thought Eda would show, and this episode while talking to Eda he told her that he was expecting her and the candles were for her.  So... did he purposely allow Balca in to provoke Eda's jealousy? If so, I'm not sure this is his best course of action. It's certainly not with regards to fanning Balca's dangerous pretensions, but I'm not sure he's getting his best result with Eda either. It's true that it gave him an excuse to flirt, make the bet, tease her, bask in her obvious jealousy even if she won't admit it, and get a Parisian date out of it. I suppose that's not a bad day's work. On the other hand, if he'd sent Balca on her way, he would have had a happy Eda, in his house, sitting on the couch next to him, watching a movie with him, which also could have led to a very good place for him.  

It's also a mystery to me if Serkan is really clueless about Balca's intentions, or if he's playing dumb to suit his own purposes with Eda. I'm thinking it's the middle. He probably sees it but thinks it's a whole lot more harmless than it is. Like maybe he gets Balca has a crush on him, but he has no suspicion that he's in dangerous fatal attraction territory. Which is where we are. I don't want to fling words like 'crazy' around, but... bitch be crazy! If she is capable of trying to large-scale sabotage his company in her pursuit of him, that's some seriously scary stuff. WAKE UP, SERKAN. 

I said I was uneasy while watching this episode and part of it was concern over what would happen with the tender, and worrying if Balca's sabotage was going to work, leaving Eda to blame. If that had gone the other way, the fallout would have been painful. Also storylines where a fav is falsely accused always make me antsy. I was able to handle the Serkan roof collapse one because it was at the end of the episode, and they were able to figure out that he wasn't responsible right off the top of the next. But this one had me on edge all ep.  I was especially nervous after Eda made the independent report on her recommended firm part of a trust test. Sweetie, I love you, but NOOOOO. That was not the move of a professional. Serkan, as the company principle, wanting to vet a partner or vendor is completely normal and has nothing to do with how much he trusts her. Put aside the fact that she's only been in the workforce for a few months, you always want a second set of eyes on something that important. Always. She showed some of her immaturity there, which is fine, she's young and inexperienced, but it's a sign of how desperate Serkan is for her to forgive him that he humored her. That man will do anything for her, even if it doesn't make sense or is potentially damaging. I get why the writer's did it, for the suspense of Eda being out on that limb all on her own, but it was also actually a bit of a missed opportunity for him to mentor her there. (And I love when she learns from him.)

The other reason I was uneasy watching this ep was due to some frustration with Eda. See above on the trust test, but it was also a little hard to watch her just completely succumb to Serkan's charm and be in the moment with him one moment, and then the next second shake it off and be adamant that she was going to be leaving the job and him shortly.  It felt like constant whiplash. Also if she won the bet she wanted him to leave her alone? Sure, Jan. She could have asked for something really good! We all know she doesn’t really want him to leave her alone, so that pretense has gotten harder and harder to take. However, the times she rebuffed him didn't bother me as much as when she told Melo she was leaving the job. I can chalk up the ones to Serkan as part of her act, trying to protect herself and poke holes in his pretensions, but when she said it to Melo it felt more real. Like that was really what she was still planning to do, and it's really hard to reconcile that with all the moments where she puts down her guard and it's obvious she's madly in love with him.  

On a positive note, scenes where it’s clear they’re madly in love with each other were plentiful this episode. The romantic robot used every opportunity he could find to make her melt. My GAWD she has a will of iron that she was able to back away from him after he recited all the ways he could tell if a woman (her) was in love with him. He is one smooth bastard. And boy does he know her, he knows exactly what he does to her. That scene was FIRE. Not to be crass, but how did they not do it right then and there? After the last few eps, they have to be at a 100 on a scale of 1-10 when it comes to pent up sexual energy. Hey Eda, maybe you wouldn't be so jealous if you knew he had an outlet for that. I'm just sayin'.

The lunch was pretty funny and I definitely enjoyed the kicking and the under the table conversation. After refusing to admit she was jealous, Eda totally deserved that Serkan said that whatever Balca's feelings for him were, they were between him and Balca. Eeesh. I see what he's doing, he's trying to bring her feelings out into the open, and she deserves it, but I don't think he realizes how vulnerable she is over everything. He's walking a tightrope here. However, I do appreciate that he finally just admitted that he's jealous. If he'd just done that in 18, he would have saved himself some angst. Are we to infer from Serkan asking Eda not to use emojis with Efe, that Edser likes to use emojis when they text? Or was that just a generic, "don't be cute with him?"  I think I'll take that Serkan and Eda use emojis, just because it tickles me to think of Serkan Bolat doing that. All of shipper twitter thinks that's the writers poking at the actors because of how much they use them with one another on social. Who knows, maybe that explains it, since it sort of came out of the blue. You gotta love, though, that every manipulative thing Balca did either failed or backfired spectacularly. Showing up at his place, sure she succeeded in upsetting Eda and derailing their night, but it also put Eda on her guard and brought about the flirty wager between Eda and Serkan. She left the earring, but Eda found it before she could use it as an excuse to return. She broke her heel, but that just gave her a ruined pair of shoes and Melo an excuse to get her out of there so Serkan and Eda could be alone. She and her devious friend succeeded in throwing Melo and Eda off the scent, however all that meant was that Serkan won the bet and gave him the pretense needed to get her to agree to the most romantic date on the planet. She sabotaged the report, but Eda still found out about the company's background and Eda was the hero when ArtLife won the tender. Balca: 0 percent success rate so far. 

THE ICE SKATING SCENES WERE PURE MAGIC!  It was fun to see the whole cast out there having a blast, but obviously it was the Edser scene at night that lit up the whole show. Damn was that pretty. (it's currently my ipad lock screen and home screen) The chemistry between the actors was on display all episode, but here it just exploded. When Eda said she was hot, no kidding! How could you not be? And I agree that Serkan speaking French to her was OMG. Love, love, love the date that Serkan planned for them in Paris. I'm bereft that we'll likely never see it. Damn you pandemic, look what you've taken from us! The characters, and the audience, deserve an entire episode of Paris romantic fluff. We've all earned this! 

The date sounded perfect and I found it very interesting that he had purposely never been to Montmartre. So at some point he promised himself he'd only go there with a woman he was truly in love with, makes me wonder if it was a much younger Serkan who made that promise. The Serkan we met in the pilot didn't believe in love, he was hard-hearted, he actually talked with Engin about how a contract, a bloodless business transaction, was the way to go for relationships. Robot Bolat. So I don't think he made that idealistic promise any time recently. If so, that means he's had that in the back of his mind for years, but Eda's the only woman he's ever considered taking. My heart. I love how the show keeps showing us and telling us that this is the first time Serkan has ever been in love. You could see in that scene that Eda was right there with him. She was so happy and in the moment and swept away by the romance. She was as excited for Paris as he was. I know we all wanted a kiss/declaration here, it would have been a very good moment for it. A very good one. But the show has other plans for them, so we wait.

So, yeah, I really liked the Edser we got, but Eda’s hot and cold act was hard to reconcile at times. However, perhaps it all came together in the end, when she's talking to Melo and Ceren about Paris. She was feeling troubled over it, probably what agreeing to go with him meant, but they both told her to listen to her heart in Paris and it seems like she was going to do it: "From now on I'll stop worrying. I'm opening a new page in life." So I think in that moment she was ready for next steps and was planning to be open with him in Paris, let's hope it carries over to the next episode even without Paris. 

Actually, that whole conversation was a bit of a window into her psyche and was more illuminating than almost anything in the episode in that regard. When Eda says she’s worried, Melo teases her that she's nervous to be alone with Serkan Bolat, and then jokes that all young women would like to have that problem, including herself.  Eda does NOT like that joke and actually verbalizes it, "Melo, at least you don't do that."  That was a huge spotlight into Eda's insecurities, like she is really discombobulated by witnessing women showing interest in him while they're in such a nebulous place. Since she is coming off of what happened with Selin, and was already feeling jealous when the first candidate set her off with (her creepy) talk of chemistry last episode, then finding Balca at Serkan's house in the opening scene, I suppose it's no surprise that all of that has had some residual effects. But that it's to the point where she can't take a joke from Melo is telling. Poor thing.  

My hope is that this is just something she's working through while she's feeling off-kilter about everything. It would be one thing if they were together, but she's in this headspace where half the time she says she's leaving and it's over between them and half the time she acting like his wife, so I think she's just discombobulated. Maybe she just wants time to figure things out, but feels like she doesn’t have it, because someone is going to swoop in and take her place and that’s feeding her jealousy? The fact that Serkan can’t see it (Selin and Balca) until it’s out of control doesn’t help. 

It's natural for her to be upset that this woman has entered the scene and is clearly trying to maneuver herself into Eda's place in Serkan's life. However, there is an easy fix to this. Just go be with him. Come on, Eda, we know you can do it! You're ready. You’re primed. Bring on the New Year's Ep!

[alottamoney]

Lisa anon again.Thank you for for insightful answer.But - first things first- am I not a seer or what?You saw what happened with the BP debut on weVerse.WV "mistakenly" made a technical error that basically was free promotion of BP's debut .After they apologised saying "oops!" and corrected their "mistake".In short ARMY suddenly had BP in their following tag after they made their debut.They had to go to the BP page to leave manually.This is shaping out to be a very interesting turn of events considering BTS didn't/doesn't need BP for anything,whereas bp benefits all things good from this association.Lisa has been trending non-stop since her "supposed slip up" in JK's vlive.For BTS, Nothing but money can be gained from this association.They are at a stage where they should collaborate with independent Korean artists to not only uphold them,but for self enrichment as well.

To explain about my perceived after-effect of jikook,I have to talk about a key decision that V made,which is corroborated by other members as well(Suga,Jimin). Keeping his worklife and personal life separate.He considers BTS his work life.The friends are in Wooga squad,who were like unicorn to the members.If you go back in time this change came about from Fall 2018.You can see where I am going with this.

When you think about jikook,you think about jimin.I think by now it is general consensus that bighit promoted jikook to heavily promote jimin.I don't know if I can write so much here but I am trying to provide you with the short version.I believe Taekook had disagreements about bts vs them very strongly in 2018 which was about which should they focus on more.Coupled with the fact that now they were quite openly a pair in front of the members and key company people,they were under pressure not to neglect their professional commitment.I had a hunch before that Jungkook struggled with this a lot.He confirmed it for me(supplemented by My Time and his 'all of my life' cover) when he suggested a story "The herdsmen and the weaver",which is a sad love story of two people who fell in love,but due to them neglecting their chores,were banished by the king who allowed them to see each other only once a year.The king wanted to teach them a lesson. I think bunny drowned himself with work to numb the pain.While Taehyung who didn't have as much load as bunny,wanted the opposite.Jikook comes in here because jimin's schedule is almost as full as bunny's.Here,I sincerely believe, jimin exercised some behaviour regarding Taekook's relationship,which Tae didn't like,and later the members would react negatively to it too.Jimin is a strict person regarding his work ethic.Tae is an easy going intuitive person. I think Jimin was opposed to the idea of taekook in BTS's workspace due to his aforementioned work ethic.and don't forget that jikook was ongoing too,which obviously Tae would've preferred would happen with less "intensity" shall we say.I have seen angry Tae during jikook moments and I have also seen Jimin noticing that and smirking.He didn't take it seriously but it's safe to assume that Tae was serious.It's interesting that jikook could converse and have flirty talking and Tae would be fine.But the extreme physical ones would rearrange his face. On the professional front, he was not being heard and recognized which was just a mess.

With the other members it too was easy to see.They started getting irritated with jikook for 1. BTS is not only jikook.But for a time it seemed only they were the bts.The others were just there.Jikook and co. It did not suit with other members. 2. They did not like jimin in taekook situation.I remember around that time Taekook were extremely hot and cold.And from that time(late 2018- early 2019) , vmin never seemed the same.There was a time when in interviews /place where Jikook was happening,RM and Jin would look from Tae to jikook I kid you not.It wasn't about romance.But couples are gonna fight and makeup.That's the rule of the universe.If you are picking sides in fights just remember after a while they are gonna be together and you are going to feel like shit.

Relationships that changed that you cannot deny no matter how much you look at it : 1. Suga-Jimin - Suga had a real softcorner for Jimin.Extreme is the right word.But now it is not like before.Instead Suga became extremely protective of V.

2. Jin- Jimin - I don't know what happened but again Jin has bonded with Tae for some time.Jin has had a great relationship with Jimin but now it's not reflected in their demeanor.

3. Vmin- The biggest change.They are cordial with each other.But they are not bffs no matter how much they preach it.Tae has kept Jimin outside his boundary of personal life for quite some time.They are professional so it is not apparent to the newcomers.But ARMY have seen them grow up.

I struggled with one thing.Why would Jimin not think V's anger was serious being his "bff"?I have a feeling he thought of it as silly.Not going to lie I think other members thought of it too.They couldn't put themselves in V's shoes as 1.They lacked perspective of a male who was attracted to another male. 2.They lacked serious relationship experience in general.From 2019 things changed.You can sense that the members really started giving their relationship respect.I wonder how much of it is because they have started their own serious relationships.Jin is 30,RM Hobi Suga all are way older than Vminkook.Before they used to tease Taekook and thought of them as chaotic duo,but how their attitude towards them has changed!

I also think their personal romantic relationships have taught them Tae's emotion was not a silly matter.Some things you cannot help.They also think of JK as a bit immature at times but professionally he is the mature man with excellent work ethic.I think no matter what JK does, he is soft corner of every hyung.

The members now has solo successes.They are secure.But in 2018 they were suddenly getting superstardom and they weren't ready.Insecurity about their abilities made them wary.Jikook getting the forefront most of the time was not appreciated.Jimin's overly caring attitude towards bts's future also I think pissed the members off.At 30 you want to have a relationship.Someone to go back to.You cannot be like work work all the time just slaving away.Jimin would rather taekook focus on their work more.I know each people can choose how they prioritise but taekook didn't want to abide by it. The members too.I know Jimin encouraged JK about his work a lot but there is a difference between JK and Jimin here.JK wants to be independent from BTS.Not that he doesn't want to be in bts.But he wants to sing,dance the way he wants,not because he is told to.JK is trying very very hard to be independent and establish his singer-songwriter profile and he has done a marvellous job with it.In contrast Jimin focuses on BTS as a whole.The problem is BTS is 7.6 more independent mind than Jimin. Idk what is in the future so lets wait and see.

Lisa anon😊

I thought of you when the weverse incident happened. I still stick to my opinion that a Liskook collab will not be well received by the fandoms but if it does happen then I would like to hear less of how shippers are the reason Tae and Jungkook chose not to interact with each other and how BigHit facilitated the awkward co-workers by not showing them in content.

I try not to form any concrete opinions about the BTS dynamics because like I said earlier they don't reveal much and I don't believe what celebrities say in general, they have an image to maintain after all. I do like theorizing even though I call them analysis, I don't consider them true analysis as we don't know or see enough.

I too have noticed Tae being uncomfortable during certain Jikook moments. Another one of the reasons Taekook stand out to me; why care about what your estranged bandmate does and over fanservice, which is scripted, of all things. If I'm not wrong they also rehearse fanservice so it can't be the first time he's seen it unlike the audience unless Jimin is doing impromptu stuff. He could be doing it to tease and genuinely doesn't see the problem, like you said maybe they don't consider it serious because it is different from their own experience with relationships. I don't want to assume anyone had any ulterior motives, I'm sure some of them had reservations about Taekook but not beyond a point-I'm not a fan of the hyungs know/expose Taekook trope. As much drama as Taekook can provide I'm sure they had their own personal problems to deal with.

I think the problem with vminkook and to an extent the rest of BTS is that they started off at the same point of familiarity and Taekook suddenly getting “closer” might also make Jimin and the others feel left out or annoyed. For the same reason, it's possible Jimin doesn't even think he's breeching any boundaries, I don't know if that makes sense. I'm sure and like you also pointed out that most of them seem to have outgrown that.

I admit I haven't paid much attention to Jimin and Yoongi's relationship but everyone I talk to agrees that Yoongi has a soft spot for Jimin and some who have access to Korean side say that Jimin is mostly seen with Jin and Yoongi outside of work and not with Jungkook which is the popular perception. So maybe they were able to move past it. 

I agree about vmin. I never really gave importance to the soulmates/bff narratives. I consider these things part of fanservice and their stage personas much like Tae fanboying over Yoongi and Hobi, Jungkook saying Namjoon is his role model, or even Jungkook saying Tae brought him out of his shell. These might not be outright lies just one-liners that make it easier for fans and for themselves. The interesting thing about vmin is that no one needs much to believe that they're bffs (even vmin shippers seem to ship them as bffs lol) No one cares that they aren't spotted together, no one is out to debunk them because their dynamics changed, and no one is upset even when they interact. Very few popular ships are as non-contentious as vmin. If I had to pick a pair that did "drift apart" then I'd pick vmin (they still seem close all said and done). Pinpointing Jikook as the cause seems too easy. Tae and Jimin seem like people who don't have much in common that could be a reason.

In terms of Tae and Jikook: Apart from the company endorsement which may have inturn promoted Jimin. I don't blame Jimin completely for what Jikook brought about. Jungkook was an equal participant in the early years of Jikook. Again "blame" is a strong word as we don't know the exact status of Taekook's relationship around the time Jikook was being promoted. I don't think Jikook do anything over-the-top, just standard kpop fanservice with the difference being that BTS is hugely popular with an international audience who might not be exposed to this type of fanservice. I don't think Jikook are attracted to each other, nothing they have said or done makes me think otherwise. Tae's discomfort seems to be disproportionate to all the possible reasons we have listed so far and he seems fine when Jungkook does fanservice with other members, he himself seems fine indulging in fanservice. Some say Jungkook isn’t too fond of Taejin fanservice (🤷🏻‍♀️). This seems to be one of those things that can be categorized under Taekook Being Weird lol Maybe we'll find out in a few years.

Lastly, I think Jimin says things the fans want to hear (all of them do). So him "relying" on BTS could just be him pandering to fans and not because of lack of ambition or personal fulfillment.

I look forward to hearing more of your thoughts. You can message me or I can answer without posting your ask if you aren’t comfortable sharing controversial opinions.💜

[bangtanbabeloveyourself]

Tarot Card Taehyung Ch. 2

Pairing: Female witch reader x warlock Taehyung ft. Jimin

Genre: Fantasy, angst, friends to lovers, future smut.

Word count: 5.7k

Chapters: 1|2

Summary: After hours of talking, Y/N decides that going to New Orleans with or without Taehyung. A nosy black bird causes a fateful encounter with a beautiful but mysterious stranger. A bad draw of the cards may prove more dangerous than anyone could have predicted. 

Posted: July 15th, 2019

You stared at yourself in the mirror, having just put your barely-damp hair up in a bun on the top of your head. You had found another wit--warlock. Well, technically your grandma did, but that’s not important. What is important is the fact that you now have someone to ask all of the questions you had built up since your grandma had passed away. 

The only thing you couldn’t seem to figure out was why your grandma had never mentioned him before. Apparently this was his third year coming to your grandma’s, yet she never mentioned another magical being. A loud shrill whistle from the kitchen interrupted your thoughts. You shook your head and left the bathroom, walking out to take the kettle off the stove. 

You looked over to find Taehyung pouting out the window, his mind on other things. You sighed and rolled your eyes. “Stop pouting over there. You really didn’t think I was going to let you sleep with me, did you?”

He turned to you, his arms crossed in front of him. “Kind of, yeah. Am I blind or did you not have a painting of me downstairs?” 

Your cheeks flushed bright red before you busied yourself with pouring two cups of tea. “I told you! Sometimes the magic just takes over when I paint. I didn’t do it consciously.” 

“Uh huh. I know that’s what you’re telling yourself, but I can see through you.” He said as he walked over and plopped down on your sofa. 

With his back turned to you, you paused for a moment, fanning your face slightly. You weren’t lying. You really had no control over that painting, but Taehyung wasn’t wrong either. If you hadn’t figured it out, you’d both probably be in your bed right now. An enticing idea too, but learning more about your culture outweighed it. Besides, sleeping with him would probably complicate things. It's best to stay professional, right?

Taehyung cleared his throat, turning back to look at you. "Yo, witch. Are you coming or what?" 

You narrowed your eyes at him before grabbing the two mugs. "That's awfully close to a very unkind word Mr. Kim. I'd be a little more careful if I were you." 

He rolled his eyes and accepted the mug you brought him. "Oh please. You couldn't stop saying the word earlier. Now I'm not allowed to call you that? What would you prefer I called you? Hermione?" 

You set your mug on your coffee table before plopping down next to him on the couch, causing him to spill some tea on his hand, a smug smile on your lips as you hear him curse. 

"Aww, poor baby. Karma's a bitch," you teased before reaching for your mug, blowing on the top before taking a sip. 

He set his mug down, blowing on his now reddening hand. "Yeah, she's a witch too," he said with a pout on his lips. 

You rolled your eyes before turning to face him. You crossed your legs and leaned back against the armrest of the couch. “Oh stop. Come here.” You reached out to grab his hand, holding it between both of yours. You closed your eyes and stayed silent. 

Taehyung watched you with annoyment. It was just a slight burn and you jumped at the chance to use your magic. It was the same with all witches. Once you discovered you had powers, you used any excuse you could think of to use them. Everyone was so magic reliant. He hated it. 

Your sigh brought him out of his thoughts. He raised an eyebrow. “What now?” 

You smirked and moved your hands, revealing his still reddened hand. He looked at his hand and then back to you, his eyebrow still cocked up in confusion. You gave him a condescending smile before you smacked the burn on his hand, causing him to cry out. “What the fuck was that for?” 

You crossed your arms over your chest and pouted. “I do not use every excuse to use my magic.” 

His eyes widened slightly before he shrugged- an attempt at feigning innocence. “Who said that?”

You narrowed your eyes before raising your hand to smack his hand again. This time he jerked his hand back. “Fine, fine. How did you know that’s what I was thinking?” 

You wiggled your hands in front of him. “Magic, duh.” He rolled his eyes and tried to comment but you cut him off quickly. “I can see and hear what a person is thinking, but only when I have direct access to their palms. And I can only hear what they’re currently thinking. I don’t have access to other parts of their mind or memories.” 

He pursed his lips before he rested his arm against the back of the couch, resting his head in his uninjured hand. “So you can basically read minds by touching people’s palms? You know, you’d make a great palm reader. I could use an assistant when I travel.” 

“And con all of those poor women of their money like you do with your powers? No thank you. I have a little more respect for my abilities than to use them to be a con artist.”

He ran his hand through his hair. “Well, I’ve got to make a living somehow. This just happens to work for me.” 

"Most people get normal jobs." 

He shrugged. "If I had a normal job, I wouldn't have been able to travel as much as I have. I wouldn't have seen what I've seen." He lowered his voice. "I wouldn't have found you." 

You stared at him for a moment before you saw the smile creeping on his face. You shoved his shoulder. "Oh whatever. Get over yourself. Those pretty boy plays of yours won't work on me now." He raised an eyebrow and you shook your head, leaning back against the armrest again. "Tell me more about magic. Tell me about where you're from. Tell me how you met my grandma." 

He pursed his lips before sighing. "Fine. Just stop being so mean to me. I am a guest after all." 

You rolled your eyes before pulling your legs up to your chest. You rested your chin on top of your knees. "A guest whom also broke into my house. I could have called the cops." 

"Fine, fine. You win. Geez.” he mumbled before taking a sip of his tea. 

You smiled softly before giving him your full attention as he started his story. 

***

“And she smacked me upside the head for that.” 

You giggled and nodded. “Yeah, that’s exactly something she would do too.” You rubbed your arms before sighing.

Taehyung frowned. “You miss her a lot, don’t you?” 

You nodded. “I do. She was the only one that cared to teach me about magic. It was scary going through this. My mom was never any good at it so she stopped trying long before she had me. But because of that, Grams was the only one that could help me.” 

“Why didn’t your mother try to send you to the academy? If she came from a magical family, she would have had knowledge about it.” 

You furrowed your brow before crossing your arms. “Honestly, I don’t know and that’s what pisses me off the most. I could have had a chance to be better at this. To be around other people like me. Instead, she home schooled me and only let me talk to Grams about it. She wouldn’t even let me talk about it around my dad.” 

Taehyung bit his lip as he watched you. He could see how frustrated you had gotten. “Well, no use getting upset about it now. The past is the past after all.” 

You looked over at him, a boxy grin spreading across his face. You couldn’t help but softly smile back. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” 

 Finally, after hours of talking, you stood from the couch and stretched a bit. "Alright. It's best to get some sleep now. It's going to be a busy day tomorrow." 

Taehyung cocked his head to the side and looked at you. "Why's that?" 

You smiled before giving the top of his head a soft pat. "Because I'm leaving." 

"Leaving? Where do you plan on going?" 

"To that academy you talked about. I need to explore my roots. The only real question here is whether or not you're willing to go with me." You looked down to him, fidgeting with the fabric of your shirt as you awaited his response. 

He sighed as his blue eyes met yours. "If I let you go alone, you're going to cause some sort of trouble. I know it. But I'm also not particularly fond of my home. I haven’t been back since I left. So I think it's probably best you go alone."

You rolled your eyes. “Fine, don’t go with me then. But I’m going whether you come with me or not. So I’m going to need you to leave now, I need to get to bed.” 

Taehyung stood before giving you a cheeky grin. “You mean, I’m not sleeping with you tonight?” 

You narrowed your eyes at him, fighting back the blush that dared to spread across your face. “E-excuse me?” 

Taehyung laughed before walking towards the door. “I’m just kidding doll. Although, you did seem to really want me in your bed only a few hours ago..” he trailed off as he cracked the door open.

You shot a glare at him and he put his hands up in surrender. “Aii. Calm down, I’m only joking. I can’t ever catch a break with you,” he muttered as he walked out of your apartment.   

And with that, Taehyung had headed back down to his tent. You shook your head and finally plopped down onto your bed. Today had been one of the craziest days of your life. You had so much running through your head. You wondered how you’d ever get to sleep. 

You turned over in your bed, looking out the window to see the top of that obnoxious purple tent and the faint light inside it. Maybe you should have let him sleep in your apartment. You shook your head and rolled onto your back. No, you didn't want to risk anything happening between you two. He was just a pretty faced con man. You couldn't fall for those deep eyes or that smile either.  

But on the other hand, your grandma did like him for some reason. She let him stick around at least. He had a certain charm to him. He was infuriatingly likeable. Taehyung did appear to care though. He may seem immature, but he did also hold your grandma in high regard.

 You yawned softly before rolling over to your side again to see the light in his tent had gone out. You pursed your lips before finally reaching over to turn out your lamp when a small black figure at your window made your gasp. You squinted in an attempt to make it out better. It looked like some bird, a raven, maybe even a crow. Before you could get a closer look, it suddenly spread its wings and took off, moving to land on the top of Taehyung’s tent before letting out a loud caw. 

“Stupid bird.” You muttered before finally flipping your light off and closing your eyes. 

***

The next morning passed quickly as you attempted to get everything in order to allow you to go on this unexpected trip. You had to go to work and figure a way around your schedule. Luckily, your boss was very understanding about the situation. He was a sweet older gentleman (whom you were certain had a thing for your grandma before she passed away) so he helped you and even gave you your check early to help accommodate for your trip. You tried to refuse it but he wouldn’t have it, despite your insisting that you had enough money saved back. After that you had to go back and pack. 

You and your indecisiveness made it almost impossible to pack effectively. You had clothes thrown about your apartment as you tried to fit as many items as you could into as small of a bag as you could. You wanted to travel light but you still wanted to be prepared. 

As you continued to rummage through your clothing, there was a knock on your door. Before you could answer, Taehyung had cracked it open and attempted to come in. “You’re not naked, are you?” he asked as he continued to peek into the room. 

You rolled your eyes. “No, I’m not. But you’d love it if I was, wouldn’t you?” 

He smirked as he opened the door the rest of the way and stepped into your apartment. “Could you blame me if I did?” he asked cheekily. 

“Yes.” You stated simply as you tried to shove another shirt into your bed. 

He watched you with amusement. “You know, you could just use a second bag.” 

You groaned before stopping completely and looked over to him. “I’m trying to avoid using a second bag. I don’t want to bring too much with me because they charge by the bag.” 

Taehyung nodded before he walked over to your closet by the door. “Do you still have Minnie’s bags? I know she had a very special one for trips. She let me borrow it once. It was gray and it had a little crescent moon on it.” 

You walked over to the closet and reached up on the tip of your toes to grab a box that continued some of your grandma’s things. “I think so. I always remember her using that bag when we went on trips together. I didn’t have the heart to get rid of it.” 

“Well, it’s a good thing you didn’t. It’s a magic bag. It can hold ten times as much as a normal bag could without ever stretching out the bag.” He said as he dug through the box as you held it. “Ah ha! Here it is.” He pulled it out and showed it to you. It was slightly bigger than a satchel bag and was a light gray with a darker gray moon on it. 

You put the box back in the closet before closing it and taking the bag from Taehyung. “This would make all this packing a million times easier. Thanks.” You beamed up at him. 

He gave you a soft smile in return before you made your way back over to your bag and started to unpack it and pack the satchel bag instead. “This is going to make a world of a difference. I have no idea how long I’m going to be gone so I can pack a lot more with me just in case.” 

“You don’t know how long you’re going to be gone? What are you expecting here doll? A Lord of the Rings type journey? It’s just New Orleans. A few days should suffice.” He said as he cleared your clothes off of a spot on the couch and sat down. 

You blushed softly. “It may seem childish, but maybe I could find more family down there. Maybe I’ll really like being in that community and want to stay for awhile. You never know.” 

He sighed before leaning back against the couch. “If you say so. I’m telling you, it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. You’re going to be disappointed. After Katrina hit, a lot of the community left, including the magical community. Before I left, the community was less than a hundred people. I can’t imagine that the population has grown since then. Not the real magical community at least.” 

“What do you mean the real one?” 

“You’ve seen some of the cult movies, right? The witchy shit is becoming more popular these days. Every outcasted girl wants to be a witch. Every outcasted guy wants to be a vampire. That community has grown bigger in New Orleans over the years. It makes me worry for you.” He looked you over once, causing you to stop folding your shirt. 

You put your hands on your hips. “And why does that make you worry for me?” 

“If you couldn’t figure out on your own that I was a warlock, how are you going to be able to tell the difference between the fake ones and the real ones?” he said with a smirk spreading across his lips. 

You rolled your eyes. “Oh please. We both know I was able to figure it out. I just figured it out a little differently than another witch might.” 

Taehyung clicked his tongue. “Okay, so if that’s true, then are you telling me you’re going to bring all of your paint supplies with you and try to paint a witch? Then what? Go and search for her in the city? That could take weeks!” 

You shrugged your shoulders and continued packing. “Well, not exactly, but sort of, I guess. That’s why I said it might take a while. I’m in no rush for this. I’ve waited this long. Another couple weeks won’t kill me.” 

He sighed before running a hand through his hair. “You’re something else Y/N. You really are.” Before you had a chance to comment, he stood and walked back towards the door. “Well, when you’re done packing, come get me. I’ll take you to the train station and see you off.” 

You nodded to him and then he left, leaving you to your packing. With all of the extra space you had, you were able to pack about two weeks worth of clothes. That in itself would have made you ecstatic. The fact that you could fit your sketchbook, pencils, all of your bathroom things and still had plenty of space had you on cloud nine. Magic truly was amazing. 

After a final sweep of your apartment and a quick trip to the gas station for snacks, Taehyung and you set off to the train station. It was only about a twenty minute drive and the would be awkward silence was covered by the sound of the radio playing and the soft singing by Taehyung. 

You had tried to occupy yourself by scrolling through your phone, but you found your mind wandering as you listened to his voice. By the end of the car ride you and Taehyung had managed a couple of duets together which caused you both to laugh as he parked the car. 

“You have a very pretty voice.” You said softly to him as he opened the door for you. 

It may have been the first time you’ve really seen him blush before. “Oh, uh thanks.” He cleared his throat before he continued. “Now, I’ll go with you and wait until your train leaves, but after that you’re on your own.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a little black book. He handed it to you. 

“What is this?” You asked as you started to flip through the book. 

“It’s a book of useful information for you. Some people you can try to find, safe places for witches to go, stuff like that. It might be a little out of date though. I haven’t been there in over 6 years. But the academy address should still be the same.”

You closed the book and tucked it into your satchel before smiling up at him. “Thank you, Taehyung. I really do appreciate it.” 

He ran a hand through his hair and pulled his phone out to check the time in an attempt to hide his blush from you. “Yeah, well we should probably get going in there. They’re probably going to get started boarding the train soon.” 

He reached down to grab your hand, tugging at you to follow along. He quickly realised what he did and dropped your hand. “S-sorry. Force of habit.” 

You smiled softly and shrugged. “It’s not a big deal. Thank you for coming to see me off. I really wish you would change your mind about coming with me though. I think you’d be a much better guide than this little book.” 

He waved off your words as you both found the train that you were going to be boarding. “I told you, I’d really rather not go back to that place. I left for a reason, you know.” 

You shrugged before you sat down on a bench near the train. “‘The past is the past after all.’” You quoted him. “Besides, it couldn’t have been that bad. If it’s been over six years, it’d probably be a good time to come back.” 

He shook his head before sitting on a bench across from you. He pulled out his deck of tarot cards. “Sorry doll, nothing you say is going to convince me to change my mind.” 

You watched as he began to shuffle them. “Do you ever go anywhere without those cards?” 

He gasped, as if offended. “I would never. You might think it’s all a con, but I trust the cards. If they’re used right, they can be very useful tools.” 

You rolled your eyes as you see a few girls starting to notice him. “Oh sure, and they’re not just a tool to pick up and con those poor unknowing girls.” 

He looked at you and smirked. “Is that jealousy I hear, Y/N?” 

You scoff. “You’d love it if it was, wouldn’t you?” 

“Ahh, deflecting the real question. That says a lot about you doll, whether you believe it or not.” He said before turning his attention to one of the girls that had walked over towards him. They began talking about his cards and you rolled your eyes as you tried to focus on something else. 

You looked around the station. There weren’t many people. Granted, this particular train station was not very large. As you looked around, you noticed a single black bird perched on top of your train. The more you looked at it, the more you felt like it was staring at you. You didn’t like the vibe it was giving off. It made you feel uneasy.  You continued to stare at it as you pulled out your phone and snapped a quick picture. As soon as you snapped the photo, the bird cawed and moved down a couple of train cars. You didn’t know what was going on, but you had a strange feeling about this bird. But it was just a bird. Why were you worrying so much?

You were brought out of your thoughts when you heard the obnoxious laugh from one of the girls attempting to flirt with Taehyung. You rolled your eyes before you got up, Taehyung not even noticing you leave. Instead, you decided to follow the bird. You felt a little silly at first, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that you needed to follow it.  Every time you got closer to it, it would hop over to the next train car and wait for you to get close again before hopping over to the next. 

You probably looked like a moron following around this bird. You tried your best to make it seem like you were just wandering about instead of following a random bird. As you approached the rear of the train, the bird spread its wings and took flight, but only for a short distance. It flew over to an opened door before dropping to the ground. This time the bird waited for you to catch up. You were only a few feet away from it before it cawed at you and walked through the door and flew down a long corridor. You hesitated for a moment, checking to see if there way anyone around before heading in after the bird. 

You walked down the long corridor, listening to the soft caws coming from the bird. You really felt stupid. This was just a mindless animal. But then why would you keep having this weird, unexplainable feelings? It just didn’t make sense. Something was going on. Being so lost in thought, you never noticed when the cawing stopped. You rounded the corner that the hallway had taken and ran directly into the person in front of you. 

You fell back a little before you bowed in an attempt to apologize. “I am so sorry! I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.” 

You heard a chuckle before you looked up to the man in front of you. You nearly gasped. He was breathtaking. Deep brown eyes framed by wavy blonde hair parted down the middle; plump pink lips turned upwards into a smirk. “Well hello to you too.” He took a step back, giving you a bow in return. “No need to apologize. I wasn’t watching where I was going either. Although, I’m afraid I’m not sorry for running into such a beautiful lady.” 

You felt the heat rise to your cheeks immediately. “Oh, well uhm. Thank you.” 

He smiled at you which only made your heart ache. His smile was so genuine that it even touched his eyes, crinkling as if they were smiling as well. “My name is Jimin. And you are?” 

You extended your hand to offer a handshake. “I’m Y/N. It’s nice to meet you Jimin.” 

He took your hand in his, giving it a firm shake. “Likewise, Y/N. Now, can I ask what you’re doing all the way down this corridor? You don’t look like you work at the train station.” 

You blushed before you let out an uneasy chuckle. “Well, you’d be right about that. I, uh, was just bored. We got here a little too early and I was restless.” As if you would actually tell him you were chasing a bird. 

He raised an eyebrow. “We?” 

You nodded. “Yes, my friend is waiting for me by the train. He got caught up in some work thing and I got restless so I left.” 

Jimin nodded before he motioned towards the exit. “Well, let’s get you back out there so you don’t miss your train.” You started to walk back, feeling Jimin’s eyes on you as you walked. “So, where are you traveling to?” he asked as he moved in step with your pace. 

You wrapped your arms around yourself as you held back a wince. The weird feeling from earlier had changed. It had started to become almost painful. The funny feeling had turned into a dull ache.  You tried to ignore it, chopping it up to hunger pains as you tried to focus on Jimin. 

"Y/N?" Jimin asked as he noticed you falter in your pace. 

You shook your head and tried to give him a smile. "I'm sorry, I zoned out there. What did you ask?"

He looked you over once before turning his attention to the exit. "I was just wondering where you were traveling to."

“Oh! I’m actually on my way to New Orleans.” 

This piqued his interest. "New Orleans? That's crazy. I'm heading there as well." 

"That is crazy. Are you going for business or pleasure?" You asked as you finally reached the exit. 

He motioned for you to go first, giving him the opportunity to look you over again, a wicked grin growing on his lips. "I'm hoping for a bit of both."

After you both made it back out to the station, you could see your train had started to board. You turned to Jimin and gave him a smile. "Well, I guess it's time to get going. It's my first time on a train, so I'm a little nervous."

Jimin gave you a soft smile and a reassuring pat on your shoulder. "I'm sure you'll be alright. You seem like a pretty tough lady. Now, you go on and have a good trip. Maybe we'll run into each other again." 

You nodded. "I hope you have safe travels! Thank you for walking me back. The last thing I needed today was to miss this train." You said with a chuckle. 

"And we wouldn't want that. If you don't hurry you won't get to say goodbye to your friend." Jimin said as he pulled his sleeve up to check the time on his watch. "It's almost time to go." 

You gasped and started to head off towards Taehyung. You turned to wave to Jimin. "Here's to hoping we get the chance to meet again in New Orleans!" 

The smirk that appeared on Jimin's lips sent another ache in your gut. "I hope we do, Y/N."  And then he walked off towards the opposite end of the train. 

You looked after him for another moment, resting your hand on your stomach. You really needed to grab something to eat. You rummaged through your bag until a hand grabbed your shoulder and made you jump. 

"Aiiish. Calm down, doll. It's just me. You're going to miss boarding." Taehyung said as he grabbed your hand and tried to give you a little tug. "Hey, Earth to Y/N. What's wrong?" 

You shook your head before turning to walk past Taehyung. "Oh, uh. Nothing. Let's go. I'm going to miss boarding." 

"That's what I just said." He mumbled as he followed after you. “Where did you go, anyway?” 

You shrugged off his words before stopping in front of your train car. “Nowhere important.” 

Taehyung looked you over once before sighing and shoving his hands in his jacket pockets. “I don’t have a good feeling about this anymore, Y/N. Are you sure you really want to do this?” 

Taehyung didn’t have a good feeling either. Maybe you shouldn’t go. No, you had to go. Taehyung just didn’t want to deal with his family. You were going to find our more about yours. You squeezed the strap of your grandmother’s bag before nodding. “Yes. You coming into my life was the push I needed. There’s no point in putting this off. I need to know more.” You turned to look at Taehyung. “Thank you for that.” 

He waved you off. “Just be careful. Not all witches are good witches. Use my book, okay?” You smiled and nodded before taking the step up onto the train. You walked through the door, moving down to find your seat. As you moved to your seat, Taehyung stayed in his spot. 

He had started to get a headache as soon as you had left, but it wasn’t a normal headache. With every pulse, your name would flash into his mind. It made it incredibly hard to focus on his tarot readings. That’s when he went to look for you. It eased once he saw you, but now that you were boarding the train, it was starting to get worse. Something wasn’t right, he just couldn’t figure out what.

Finally Taehyung moved to sit on the bench. Maybe getting off of his feet would ease the pain, but he rammed his knee into the side of the bench, his tarot cards flying out of his pocket and spilling onto the concrete. He cursed as he rubbed his knee before leaning down to pick up the cards. 

He gasped at the way the cards had fallen. All of the cards were facing down except for the card on the very top of the scattered pile. The Tower. An ominous card that always indicated some form of disaster. He shook his head as he quickly gathered his cards back up.

It was just a coincidence. It wasn’t real, right? Y/N was just going to New Orleans. It’s not like she’d actually find anything down there. He tucked the cards back into his pocket before it hit him. She might not find anything, but something might find her. 

The loud shriek of the train whistle made Taehyung jump. He turned to look as the train slowly began to move. Something bad was going to happen to that train. Something bad was going to happen to Y/N. And she has no idea.  

‘Damn witches and their cryptic magic’, he thought before he took off in a full sprint, trying to catch up to the now moving train. He had to run with everything he had in him before he was able to grab a hold of the railing on the back of the train car. Once on the safe side of the railing, he collapsed onto the ground panting. He leaned his head back against the door of the train car as he looked at the now shrinking station. He was going home whether he wanted to or not now. 

After taking a few minutes to catch his breath, Taehyung finally stood and opened the door. Luckily very few people had gotten on the train at the last station. No one paid him any mind as he made he was down the little hallway. He peeked through the windows of every room before he finally found yours. 

He knocked on the door and waved to you. You gasped and stood to let him into the room. “Taehyung! What are you doing here? I thought you weren’t going to come.” 

He gave you his big boxy grin and shrugged. “I couldn’t let you go through New Orleans during Mardi Gras all on your own. If you’re going to be down there for as long as you say, you’ll be staying during it,” he said as he moved into the car and sat down on the seat across from where you had been sitting. 

He didn’t want to lie to you, but he also didn’t want to worry you. He wasn’t entirely sure what these feelings were, or if anything was actually going to happen. For now, it was best to just see how things went. He might not be able to do much, but he knows that if something happens, he needs to be there for you. 

You crossed your arms before sitting down across from him, trying to hide the smile that threatened to break onto your face. He actually did care enough to come with you. But you couldn’t let him know you wanted him here. You couldn’t let him know that it made that stomach ache go away. He’d never let you live it down if he did. You cleared your throat. “I can handle myself, you know.” 

He gave you a soft smile. “I’m sure you can. But I couldn’t get your voice out of my head.” He put his hands into his jacket pockets, his fingers moving over his tarot deck.  “I think I’ll regret it if I don’t go.”  

[thecloserkin]

fic rec: Are You Mine? and I Want Some More by PoetHrotsvitha

fandom: Assassin’s Creed: Syndicate

pairing: Evie Frye/Jacob Frye

word count: 54k and 50k respectively (one is a direct sequel to the other)

Is it canon: yes

Is it explicit: this is the most explicit material i have thus far reviewed on this blog

Is it endgame: yesssss

Is it shippable: yes

One thing you guys should know about me is I don’t read a great deal of smut. I don’t actively avoid it either, and I for sure consume more smut in the context of fanfic than in professional published fiction because I feel the following quote in my bones: “It wasn’t that friendship needed to be sexualized, it was that erotica needed to be … friendship-ized.” So when I stumbled on this fic that is 80% smut stretched over the thinnest pretext of plot, based on source material I have zero familiarity with, what did I do but fall headlong for this pairing and this story. Bless you, anon who brought Fryecest to my attention, and praise the Lord for modern AUs where knowledge of canon is not mandatory.

Jacob and Evie Frye are twins born into an Assassin family and raised by their exacting taskmaster of a father to take down the Templars. There’s no Templars or Assassins in this modern AU of course, just Evie’s looming A-Levels and their absent academic of a father. Evie’s still the golden child, of course—she’ll follow in their father’s footsteps and get her Ph.D. Jacob is the problem child. He’s already fallen in with the Wrong Crowd, he’s impulsive, he drinks and gambles and mostly solves problems with his fists. His relationship with their dad is hella strained. And because this is supposed to be PWP the author wastes no time in ratcheting the sexual tension up to 11 by having Jacob pick Evie up from her posh school on his MOTORCYCLE, each of them pretending not to be so turned on they could have combusted from desire by the end of the ride. Cool cool cool.

Their relationship begins barreling in a dom/sub direction almost from the word go. Evie is one thousand percent the take-charge, Type-A personality, so the idea is that she needs to relinquish that control in the bedroom, and Jacob is the only one she trusts to dominate her. Because they’re twins and they balance each other out adfkdfkdfjdkfd. The scene in the beginning where Jacob tells her not to button up her blouse while she’s making breakfast, and she actually listens to him instead of ignoring or insulting him, holy shit that was hot. It starts so small but eventually he’s got her wearing a wireless vibrator to class and begging for her “punishment” when she takes it out without his permission because it was too distracting.

I imagine this is what the 50 Shades of Grey phenomenon was about. I haven’t read 50 Shades of Grey myself, but I’ve interacted with people who rave about it and clearly got something out of those books, bad as they were. I’m not trying to compare the quality of this story to 50 Shades of Grey—it’s lightyears superior to that dreck—just that when I finished this fic I had the dazed realization that this was why people read smut.

There’s a throwaway line in Jacob’s internal monologue where he muses “they seem to be going about this backwards,” because he’s buying flowers for her the day after fingering her to a screaming orgasm, and yes I am 100% here for this trope. Ffs he sits with her in the library to keep her company while she studies! He waits for her/escorts her to her one hundred and one extracurricular activities! He’s a really immature 17-year-old and he’d never dream of doing this for anyone else, but when it comes to Evie he becomes suddenly sweet and thoughtful and solicitous. He’s constantly pausing in the middle of sex to ask for her enthusiastic & affirmative consent and reminding her to use the safe word. At the same time he’s madly jealous when anyone else shows a flicker of interest in her and he regularly makes her admit he “owns” her during their role-play. They are each other’s firsts which for some reason is really important to me in these kinds of they’re-teenagers-exploring-their-sexuality setups. This is Evie hitting up the lingerie boutique in preparation for their FIRST WEEKEND GETAWAY:

“I’m going away for the weekend with my-” Evie almost stumbled on the word, “-boyfriend.” What a strange concept.

I AM TRASH FOR THIS INCEST TROPE i love the way she stumbles over that word. Bc that’s not the box that Jacob occupies for her, is it? He’s much more than that. I love the way she alternates between begging him to put it in her cunt and calling him a prat and a shitheel; just because he’s the love of her life doesn’t make him stop being her insufferable little brother. You know what else I’m trash for? ALL the sneaking around tropes. One time while sexting with him in a storage closet at school she’s busted by one of the teachers and only barely has time to lock her phone before he confiscates it.

So the first fic ends with their dad finding the sexts and nudes on Evie’s phone, disowning them both, and Evie choosing to go to University of Edinburgh because their dad knows too many people at Oxbridge. The twins get a flat together and it’s happily ever after. Except no! In the sequel it’s ten years later and Evie and Jacob have returned to the house they grew up in to say goodbye to their dying father, and they’re ESTRANGED OH NO WHAT HAPPENED. Evie has a four-year-old in tow. We find out in fairly short order that the kid is Jacob’s, but Jacob doesn’t find out the truth until we’ve sent him through the angst wringer. The fic is about how they grieve and reconcile and how Jacob learns to parent, and this one is actually like 60% plot and I think I like it even better than the first one. This author’s note really spoke to me:

I’ve read a fair number of sibling incest modern AU fics in a few different fandoms and they all tend to end at “and then they ran away from their families and lived happily ever after/epilogue of sexy fun times possibly with the introduction of hey they've had a kid!”. And I mean I love that, don't get me wrong. But I guess I’m also weirdly preoccupied with the part about what comes after that, because it always seemed far too dreadfully simple an outcome. Normal relationships are rarely that easy, so why would these be? Then again I'm probably putting too much thought into a porn fic, LOL.

DEAR @poethrotsvitha, THIS IS A SIGNED PETITION TO PLEASE NEVER STOP OVERTHINKING THE PLOT OF YOUR PORN FICS. Like, nobody starts fucking their brother unless they really mean it, because the risk of the relationship going pear-shaped and the two of you still being stuck in each other’s orbit because there’s no “breaking up” with family? That’s a big risk. And also why incest pairings feel so high-stakes and I am trash for them, obvs. One of the reasons the dom/sub dynamic is so integral to their relationship was because Evie had a tendency to dictate to Jacob what he “can and can’t do,” and he understandably chafed against it sometimes. It’s what led to their breakup five years ago. And so him taking charge in the bedroom is a kind of counterbalance, and there’s a scene in this fic where she lets him role-play a noncon situation as a way to partly soothe his jealousy.

To a large extent it’s their son who brings about their reconciliation, but their son is also a hyperactive little git who throws a monkey wrench in their sex life, so now instead of hiding their relationship from their dad they’re tiptoeing around a four-year-old. And the big character development that happens on Jacob’s part is him recognizing that Thomas is Evie’s #1 priority now, and there comes a moment where he has to make a difficult decision to prioritize the two of them in his own life, too (by quitting his job and ending a toxic relationship). The other thing I really liked was how Jacob thinks ruefully he could have gone a another round if he were ten years younger, which he’s not, but Evie seems satisfied and that’s what matters. The recognition that he’s not a teenager anymore, and doesn’t have the stamina of one, but he’s also more mature and this time he’ll be able to give Evie what she needs? Oh, my heart. Like I said I loved them being each other’s firsts as teenagers but this, this second chance they’ve got as adults, this is beautiful.

Ok so this is Evie begging Jacob to fuck her in a closet in the middle of their dad’s funeral service??!:

“Please, I just need to forget. Just for a little bit- I need to forget, please-” Oh, God, this was a terrible idea. A terrible idea that she would die before she stopped- she felt like an addict after years of sobriety, pushed by stress and grief to needing that all-consuming high that she'd never quite been able to forget. Her fingers worked at his belt, pulling it open, unbuttoning his trousers to draw the heel of her palm along where he was already hard. “Evie,” he rasped, shuddering against her touch. “Shh,” she said, tucking his pants down enough to pull his cock free, giving it a few firm strokes. “Shh.” If they talked, it would be too real. It had to be rushed and frantic, to feel like it was just the once, to ease the ache in her chest.

And this is after they finish (“if only it could have lasted forever”):

Silently, she turned to let him zip up her dress … There was a warmth against the back of her neck as she felt him draw her hair aside and press a kiss to the sensitive skin, hesitant and uncertain.  "Thank you," she breathed into the darkness, listening to the click of his belt as it slid back into place.  He just sighed, leaning his forehead against her shoulder, saying a million things without speaking a word. 

LEANING HIS FOREHEAD FOR A MILLISECOND AGAINST HER SHOULDER OMFG I AM DECEASED

Ok so to return an earlier point: When you want a canon incest happy ending in a modern setting (as opposed to if you’re both Targaryens) the most popular option is run away and live as an unrelated couple, which necessitates cutting ties with everyone you’ve ever known. This may be more or less difficult depending on the quantity and quality of those ties; unless this is Flowers in the Attic and you’ve literally been locked in the attic for years there’s bound to be people you care about other than your sibling so this is a monumental ask. The Fryes choose option B, “living openly as siblings and keeping the incest on the dl”. This option is not without risk, of course, since exposure is always a possibility, and Evie has to put up with the other moms at Thomas’s preschool eyeing Jacob like a piece of meat. Still, it means Thomas gets to bake cookies with his grandmother, who would not have let Evie and Jacob back in her life if they flaunted the truth. I mean, it’s not that she doesn’t know her kids are fucking, it’s just that a don’t-ask-don’t-tell policy allows everyone’s relationships to remain intact:

She seemed to be struggling to get the words out. “Is Thomas…” There were a few ways that this question could go, as far as Jacob could see, and he didn’t particularly want to deal with any of them. He leaned against the counter, palms rigid against the cold surface. “I’m really tired, Mother.” “I know. I just…” There was a terrible pause. “Are— are you and Evie…” Still facing the toaster, Jacob closed his eyes. He couldn’t muster a lot of fake outrage, but he planned to deny everything anyway. He didn’t care about how plausible it was. It was easier for everyone that way, especially Mother. Before he could open his mouth, though, Mother’s chair scraped back. “Actually, never mind. It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

Every Wednesday Evie (who’s moved back in with her mom) leaves Thomas with his grandma and goes to “book club” which is really date night at Jacob’s. And the two of them get right up to their old tricks:

When he gave her just the slightest nudge upwards with his hips, she finally let a broken whisper rasp out. “I can't- I want- please-” Jacob clicked his tongue. “You know what I want you to say.” She twisted her neck around again, and he could see that her eyes were now glassy with longing. “Huh?” “It's simple— just ‘My greedy cunt belongs to my brother’. “ “I will not."

The process of turning that initial “no” into a “yes” is scorchingly hot so there you go, I love these two, I love this fic, I have definitely seen the light and I'm ready to embrace smut.

[wazafam]

For the past five years, the residents of Bravo's Summer House have invaded the easternmost tip of Long Island, NY to escape the hustle and bustle of work-week Manhattan. In season 5, filmed during the pandemic, they're sequestering together for the whole summer, amping up the tension and heightening the outbursts.

RELATED: Summer House: Where To Find The Cast On Instagram (Season 5)

Since the reality show premiered in 2017, the cast has changed some, but the drama has remained the same. Of course, a number of these up-and-coming professionals stand out from the rest, if only to prove that even with youth and beauty, the struggle can still be real.

10 Luke Gulbranson

He may be the worst of the best, but Luke brought inter-house dating/two-timing into the mix as well as an argument that was one tequila shot away from turning into a brawl. OG cast member Kyle Cooke took umbrage with the Northern Minnesota native's treatment of women, as he'd been playing both Hannah Berner and newbie Ciara Miller. (Ciara didn't take the bait, but Hannah fell hook, line, and sinker.)

The thing is though, Luke is a working actor, most recently appearing alongside Kaley Cuoco in HBO Max's The Flight Attendant, so it's hard to know if his cad-like behavior is genuine or if he's "auditioning."

9 Lauren Wirkus

The now married (since June of 2020 as well as expecting) identical twin of Ashley, brought the confidence of a person who knew someone always had her back. Housemate Carl Radke had no chance when he was in a relationship with Lauren because when they'd have a fight, he'd end up being double-teamed by the Wirkus Circus.

She left the series after season 2, but while Lauren was in the house, she made her presence known, such as when she smashed a cake in Carl's face, or in season 2 when Lauren stepped back and gave the floor to Ashley who smashed a watermelon on it to make known their twin anger at Carl.

8 Stephen McGee

Thus far the only representative of the LGBTQ community, he brought attention to the struggle of trying to balance living his life as an openly gay man (dating Travis) and getting along with his conservative southern family.

In seasons 1 & 2, the event planner was a bit of a pot-stirrer. Giving off a very nice and almost innocent vibe, Stephen appeared to be someone to whom people felt safe in confiding. However, he'd turn around and expose those secrets the minute he felt left out or angered, such as when Stephen got fed up with Carl's treatment of BFF Lauren and revealed Carl's little-known same-sex romantic encounter.

7 Ciara Miller

As with The Real Housewives of New York, Bravo rightly decided it was time to add a POC to the all-white cast. The Atlanta native was introduced as a friend of Luke's, but because of her confidence, broke free of the association and created her own identity and friendships.

RELATED: Summer House: Ciara Miller's Age, Net Worth, Instagram, Job & More

Ciara, although a part-time model, brings a bit of gravitas to the show via her profession as an ICU nurse who was on the frontline of the COVID-19 relief efforts. Because she likely saw real-life drama in her professional life, she doesn't need it in her personal life, keeping her head while those around her are losing theirs.

6 Paige DeSorbo

The native New Yorker and fashion influencer (her bedroom at the summer house looks like a giant walk-in closet) has emerged from the crowd as the voice of reason, and like Ciara has managed to stay above the fray, presumably because she has a non-cast member boyfriend, Perry, hence no on-premises entanglements.

Paige has also evolved into the role of in-house counsel/therapist, intervening to advise, negotiate and point out when there's enough blame to go around. Because no one is perfect, she's been known to stir the pot when someone gets on her bad side.

5 Amanda Batula

When we first met Amanda she was Kyle's beleaguered girlfriend. Even though they were in a committed relationship, he saw no reason to stop seeing other women--especially after drinking too much, which seemed to be every waking moment of the weekend.

Because of that, the guest-cum-cast member had chronic Resting Cry Face, as she often screamed at him. But there's nothing like a long-awaited engagement ring to say all's forgiven. Amanda is very self-assured in her relationship, coming to Kyle's defense against anyone who "comes after my man," and recently left her full-time position as a graphic designer to become the Creative, Branding and Marketing head of Loverboy, a hard teas and craft cocktails venture started by Kyle. Their wedding has been postponed more than once.

4 Hannah Berner

No one can take a conversation from zero to 60 like this roommate. The podcast host (Berning in Hell and the new Giggly Squad with pal Paige) is the epitome of free-spiritedness and has made no secret that she's not just looking for love but looking to be loved. Perhaps now that, on season 5, Hannah has gotten over Luke by getting under new guy (now fiance) Des Bishop, she will calm down.

Unfortunately, this co-host of Bravo's Chat Room is often hard to like because she constantly starts fights--especially with Kyle. The phrase "hurt people, hurt people" comes to mind when it comes to this young woman who, even when smiling, seems rather sad.

3 Carl Radke

They say life doesn't give you more than you can handle. If this is true, then Carl can handle a lot. His brother passed away, his parents' marriage failed and left his mother devastated and using her son as her sounding board, and the sales professional lost his job. On top of all that he had to come to terms with his escalated drinking. Those who recall his earlier season relationship with Lauren, and more recently with current housemates Paige and Lindsay Hubbard, know that as a boyfriend, it'll be awhile before he's ready to settle down.

RELATED: Summer House: Why Some Fans Aren't Happy That Carl Radke Quit Alcohol

Although Carl seems determined to get his life under control, beginning with his position working for Kyle running Sales and Business Development for Loverboy, there is a deep emotion that could be construed as anger under the surface, evidenced by the fight between Kyle and Luke, which had bystander Carl the first to lunge at Luke fist raised.

2 Lindsay Hubbard

Piece of work is a phrase that comes to mind when talking about this blonde bombshell with brains to match. Lindsay is ambitious and business-savvy, and not one to hold back when something's on her mind. She's at once an older sister/advisor to the house's younger female squad, yet when it comes to romance needs a mentor of her own.

Over the seasons we've seen this alpha female have the same confrontation with former cast member/lover Everett, current cast mate/former lover Carl, and current boyfriend Stephen that goes something like: "You should kiss the ground I walk on; You should only focus on me; You should make 'me' a sandwich." There's a fine line between having high standards as to how you want to be treated and wanting to be treated like a Disney Princess. Lindsay seems to be standing on it.

1 Kyle Cooke

This guy is the gift that keeps on giving. The hard-partying entrepreneur has kept it interesting from the pilot by always finding a way to make it all about him. The quintessential Peter Pan, the 38-year-old is everybody's big brother, yet can be the most immature person in the room, unaware that his frat boy days are behind him.

Kyle seems to be one of those people who cannot be confined, hence he chooses to accept the risk of being an entrepreneur rather than work a 9-to-5, and why it took awhile to remain loyal to Amanda, whom he proposed to in season 3 (2019). The couple has yet to marry, citing the global health pandemic as the reason. Although this was probably a factor, Amanda might secretly suspect what viewers have known all along: she might want to wait until Kyle grows up.

NEXT: Winter House: How The Reality Show Will Be Different From Summer House

Summer House: 10 Best Castmates, Ranked | ScreenRant from https://ift.tt/3spyoWd

[stunudo]

Rookie Mistakes

A Criminal Minds Fan-fiction

Featuring: Spencer Reid x Reader (eventual)

A/N: This is my first time writing imagines and sharing them. Please be kind. I wanted the reader to be able to fit into the story instead of creating a new character, but I did add some background details. Thank you for your read!! Enjoy the fluff, forgive the formatting issues. I do not own the characters. xoxo Stu

Setting: Season 9

Rating: T

“You know, Y/N, considering the amount of hands that office supplies pass through on their way to the round table, I doubt you want to keep chewing on pens as a concentration technique.” Spencer Reid chimed in on your temporary moment of distraction.

You turned in your chair, looking your co-worker in the eye and made an immature gagging mime at him. Dr. Spencer Reid was the smartest member of the FBI’s BAU, but he did not have the best grasp on when his knowledge was welcome. His big eyes bulged at your surprising, yet comical retort. He puckered his lips and turned back toward his own desk.

You had been on the team for two months and it was everything you had hoped and feared it would be; awful hours, lots of evil people and not always happy endings for the victims’ families. But you were now working with some of the FBI’s greatest assets and taking down unsubs with the highest rated team since its inception. Reports took hours, so that meant you had two more cups of coffee to go before your day was done. You tossed your chewed-on pen on top of the folders on your desk and slid back. You headed to your favorite place inside the BAU, the tech shrine that is Penelope Garcia’s office.

You knock as you strolled in and hug Garcia from behind in a mopey, tired manner. “Oh Sugarplum, “Garcia exclaimed,” what happened?!” “Nothing, Penny, just tired and needed to be real.” You slouched in the extra chair and watched Garcia work. She was fascinating and so nice. She made this work bearable. “Remind me, what happens if I kill a coworker?” You ask hypothetically, “that would be automatic termination, right?”

Penelope spun in dramatic fake shock, “Um, Y/N, do I need a gun or a hostage negotiator right now?”

“Garcia, girl, no. I would never. It’s just, Reid, you know? He is so smart and an amazing agent, but really?! How can he have all this knowledge and not realize when to put a sock in it, you know?” You ranted.

Garcia nodded and listened to your complaints, watching your arms flop. She smiled at you and sighed. “Uh yeah, Reid is a bit much. But if you are planning on being on this team. You are going to have to get past it. He is O.G., okay, not like Rossi O.G., but seriously the kid has been here longer than me!”

You considered the professional implications of not getting over this rut. You had worked hard for years to get here and were not going to give in now. “Gracias, girl, thanks and, um, don’t tell Derek? I will figure it out before I need any extra insight, deal?”

“Eh, I can’t hide anything from my Boo. But I will hold out through the weekend, maybe, if I can. Deal?” Penelope smiled reassuringly.

You nod and shake your head, returning to the bullpen. You found Reid doing his mesmerizing speed reading at his desk. His mop of curls falling around his face, his long fingers scrolling from page to page like a conductor moving a symphony in rhythm. You observed your coworker as you would watch someone awaiting interrogation; quietly and calculating. You knew Hotch was watching you stare, you also knew he would not say anything unless a problem arose between you and the tall genius. One more reason you loved being on this team, you had the best boss in the world. You caught Hotch’s eye as he headed out the door, you nodded your goodnight.

Meanwhile, Reid read on. You sighed dramatically, plopping yourself down into your desk chair and slid across the aisle, right into Reid’s little reading bubble.

“What are you doing?!” Reid exclaimed. He practically stood while hugging his book to his chest. You remained sitting and looked up at the agitated man. You knew you got under his skin, by using proximity to unnerve him. So you slowly wheeled closer, putting your face near to touching his chest. You glanced up and smiled, “Doctor, what are you doing tonight?”.

Reid slid out between you and his desk with quick, lithe movements, leaving his book atop the desk. He quickly looked around the room and then tilted his head and looked at you, clearing his throat. “Y/N, you can call me Spencer, or Reid if you prefer, being such a serious agent. May I inquire into your sudden interest with my leisure activities?” Reid slipped his hands into his pockets as the blush left his face, he was now a safe ten feet from you.

“Okay, Reid, I realized that I have not had any 1-on-1 time with you since joining the team. Even in the field Hotch pairs me with Rossi or JJ. I want to be an effective member of this team. In order to do that, I need to build rapport with everyone on it. Even you… who I do not quite like, at the moment.” You wheeled your chair back to your side of the aisle, but continued to face the now intrigued Reid. “So, you want to get to know me? Someone, you don’t like, for your job?” Reid nodded, “Well, I was going to a French Avant Gard Cinema night, but that doesn’t start until 11 o’clock.”

You were not surprised, though French was not a language you had known him to know. You calmly tuck your legs beneath you to sit in meditation pose upon the office chair. You spend hours practicing yoga and meditating, this is a default position. Spencer’s eyes follow your legs, but you didn’t register it. You are considering your evening plans of more work and debate asking to tag along with the good Doctor instead.

“What are the odds that we will get called on a case this weekend?” You ask intentionally because asking Dr. Reid anything rhetorically is useless. “Over the past ten years, the BAU has been called into the field on weekends, or have cases stretch into weekends a total of 263 times. So only slightly more than a 50% chance.” He did not disappoint.

“Alright, Reid,” you clear your throat,” but I do love calling you Doctor, for reasons that are entirely unprofessional. Would you mind some company?”

Spencer watches you for a moment, “Y/N, you don’t speak French.”

“How do you know that?” You cross your arms over your chest, challenging him to admit his inner knowledge of your life.

“Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N born Y/B/D attended University of Wisconsin at Madison, majored in psychology and legal studies. You attended Georgetown for your Masters while beginning your vetting process for Quantico. You have extended family from Central America, therefore you are comfortable with Spanish. But as far as I have read, you have no experience with French on paper or in the field.” Spencer rambled off your file while whittling your life down to degrees and family. He was not wrong, just missing a piece.

“Vous etes un imbecile, docteur.”

Spencer’s eyes widened.

“My parents hosted and exchange student, while I was in high school, from Belgium. What kind of host sister would I be if I did not learn his mother tongue?” “Touche,” the thin man conceded. “Oh, and Doctor?” You pointed your finger at him seriously. “I am driving.”

You would never look at him the same way again. The mini film festival was more Avant Garde than you anticipated. Reid was thoroughly enthralled with the show and you found yourself thoroughly enthralled with his reactions. It wasn’t until the second feature that you dozed off. You were exhausted and it had been one hell of a week. You came to when the lights came up between shows. You were warm and comfortable, smelling something like old books, coffee and soap. You slowly opened your eyes, realizing that your hair was plastered to your face with the puddle of drool you had left there during the last half of the film.

“Shoot me now,” you thought. Dr. Spencer Reid was watching you. You realized all too late the reason you were so comfortable was that he had draped his P-coat around you as you slept. You quickly shrugged it over to him, mumbling an embarrassed, “Thanks.” Just as you stood to stretch, both of your phones buzzed. He gave you a knowing look and a small toothless smirk. “The odds were against a weekend off after all, Doctor.” You reached for your coworker’s spindly hand to haul him out of his seat, leading you both back to Quantico.

“Garcia,” Hotch spoke to the face on the monitor, “Who will we be meeting at Mitchell airport?”

“Detective Hansen will be meeting the team at the airport and will take you downtown to the hotel,” Garcia replied. “The kid is the rookie assistant to the lead on the case, Andrews. You will meet him bright and surly tomorrow at the precinct.”

“Sounds good, thank you.” Hotch nodded.

“Nighty night, my lovelies,” Garcia saluted and the window closed on the screen.

You carefully made your way to the open row of seats closest to the bathroom. As the new agent on the team, you got the most trafficked sleeping quarters. Everyone on the jet was still half asleep, except Hotch. Honestly, the boss man never seemed like he was tired. The quiet din of the engine had become your new white noise machine, you fell asleep before the lights were dimmed.

“I know, man, but how was it that you and Y/N roll up at two thirty in the morning, in her ride?!” Morgan was harassing Reid about the night you had shared, his deep voice crossing the jet’s length in waves. You did not want to wake up, so you kept your eyes closed.

“I was attending an all-night film festival and Y/N asked if I wanted company, Morgan, that is how.” Reid replied in a nearly inaudible whisper.

“What kind of film festival?” the louder agent inquired.

“French Avant garde, it was not the best representation of the genre, but I hadn’t seen the original Fantasmaghorie. It was a good open, but Y/N fell asleep during El Dorado.”

“Well, I knew Y/N had taste. Look at you Reid, a girl invites herself on one of your nights off, but falls asleep before it is over.” Morgan chuckled.

“Y/N has been putting in extra hours on reports all week. I should have told her to go home and get some sleep instead of a team building endeavor.” Spencer mused.

“Team building?” Morgan asked, “Wouldn’t that require the team to be present? And not just the two of you?!” He emphasized the last three words, making you roll in your faux sleep.

“Y/N said she needed to build some rapport with me,” Spencer sighed,”Well, because she does not like me at the moment.” His voice disappeared. You ached at the hurt you heard in his admission. You yearned to open your eyes and see the nonverbal cues Derek was getting from the brilliant man.

“Oh man, that is rough,“ Derek mumbled, his voice drifting. You were finding it harder to hear them as the pilots were bracing for landing. You gave up your façade and quietly opened your eyes. You couldn’t see Spencer’s delicate features, only the back of his now-mussed head. Derek had his chair reclined and a support pillow around his neck. He eyed you warily, you blinked, but held his gaze.

The hotel was a drop off, shower and refueling stop. The 24hr Starbucks in the lobby was going to be making extra tips this weekend. You bunked with JJ in the first room, Rossi and Derek shared the next. Putting Reid with Hotch at the end of the hall’s peach rug. JJ had been pretty quiet on the way here, she usually held herself in when the victims were children. Sadly, that was this case. She held a graceful strength that you admired. You might be leading the questioning this case, but JJ would nail the unsub to the wall.

At 0800, the team was clean, caffeinated and wheeling out of the parking lot; heading in three different directions. Hotch was taking you to the precinct to meet with Detective Andrews. Derek and JJ were headed to the last body dumpsite and Reid was with Rossi, further questioning the babysitter of the currently missing kid. You had been in the Brew city all of two hours and the BAU was in overdrive.

“With the unsub’s escalating timeline, we may be looking at a deadline or a de-evolution.” You suggested to your unit chief.

“True, but we won’t know if it is intentional until we complete the profile.” Hotch replied, “Andrews called us because the case was quiet for months and suddenly two bodies were discovered within a month. A secondary trigger seems more likely if this is a preferential offender.”

Five kids over three years and now suddenly three targets the past month. You reviewed the digital images of tiny bodies in blankets, signs of remorse, while Hotch drove into the underground garage of the precinct.

Rossi was driving to the in-home daycare where Kyle Mason went missing the day before. Spencer shifted in his seat as the folders balanced on his lap. He could smell your perfume on the neckline of his jacket, he absentmindedly played with the collar. Rossi hadn’t spoken with Reid about women in a long time, but he hadn’t wanted to push the kid. Now he knew he needed to. “So, Y/N likes foreign cinema too?” He prodded the younger man. In a team this close, gossip was easily passed and forgotten, but Reid was unique in never having anything to hide; usually.

“I am not entirely sure what she likes, Rossi. But she does understand the French language, which was a lesson for me last night.” Spencer answered, completely missing the double entendre that he left hanging. Rossi smiled to himself, amused at the innocence left in the world.

“What does the day care teacher have to share?” The older agent got back to business, as they entered the smaller streets of the Bayview neighborhood.

You had set up all the evidence boards at the small precinct. The map for geographic profile and the happy smiling faces in school pictures of the known victims. The last boy, 4-year-old, Kyle Mason stared back at you. He had crystal blue eyes and short dark hair. He was wearing a grey dinosaur button down shirt. You sighed, returning to drawing up the signature to help complete the profile for the team to present.

You texted Garcia a few emojis to lighten your mood. She sent you back a mime, a bottle of wine and a huge question mark. You replied with your favorite thumbs up GIF of the eleventh Doctor, followed immediately with a sassy faced Glee GIF to completely shut down this absurd line of questioning. It was taking a lot of perseverance to not throttle Spencer Reid. You were not trying to date him.

“You know I can’t call her, if you are texting her.” Morgan complained while he leaned on the evidence board. You let the seasoned agent observe your layout, hoping for some feedback before the rest of the team arrived. You pocketed your phone and waited.

“Y/N, this would be better under the unsub,” Derek took a sheet from the victimology charts and slid it to the next column.

‘Right, more relevant to mobility than victimology,” you replied.

“Otherwise, this is a great summary, Y/N.” Agent Morgan complimented.

“Thanks, Morgan.” You answered, trying to hide your pride in your first solo display.

“If the unsubs comfort area is so small, why has no seen anything?” Rossi queried. He had brought in a tray full of coffees. You had to stop yourself form hugging the veteran and managed to give him your most gracious face ever instead. “I think someone has, but with the amount of kids in the neighborhood and the schools being off for winter break, the routines are off for everyone right now.” You answered.

“Good point.”

Hotch and Reid had just walked in with Detective Andrews for questioning the missing kid’s parents. “That is why the daycare was so overwhelmed. Most of these kids are only there in the summer, when the kids can play outside. That many kids in a house all day would be exhausting chaos.”

“But who would be able to get a kid to come outside, when it is below freezing?” JJ asked.

“A friend.” You stated the obvious.

Everyone looked at you shocked. Another child luring case in the same town? This seemed too coincidental, but the targets were kids themselves, not mothers.

“Garcia, I need you to pull up the details on the last three victims,” Hotch already had her on speaker phone. “Were there any mutual friends between the boys?”

“I have already checked that, sir,” Garcia paused. “Kyle was only in school half days at a private school, Jason went to one public school, and Aidan to another. No sports teams overlapped. The parents didn’t work together.”

“What about Scouts organizations?” Rossi offered.

“Negative.” Garcia clicked away at her search.

“Okay, let us know when you find something.” Hotch had to hang up on the backbone of the team. “Let’s deliver the profile.”

Before you began, you noticed Spencer eyeing your geographic profile map. You didn’t even flinch when he moved some notes around. Taking a deep sigh, perhaps you weren’t going to kill him after all.

Garcia saved the day, no surprise there. She found the link, through facial recognition software: she found the boys had all been attendees in a Saturday morning woodworking promotion at Lowe’s. And a very creepy Lowe’s employee just happened to have brought his nephew along to those classes. So not only was the kid friends with the victims, but the unsub, one Brandon Davis, 34, had access to the boys’ contact information on the safety waiver forms. Spencer had noticed the wooden models in the various boys’ rooms first, but the amazing software was what proved his hypothesis.

Hotch was driving you and Reid to the Lowe’s where the unsub worked. While JJ, Rossi and Derek were heading to his residence, in search of the missing boy. The locals had the parking lot contained, but the massive box store had three exits plus a loading dock. The possibility of civilian casualty was too great; therefore, no sirens were used and a discreet entrance to capture the unsub. Hotch had found the floor manager and had him page the unsub to the breakroom. You and Spencer paced the lumber aisle waiting for the guy to show up.

“You know a lot of this wood is imported. Though Wisconsin still has a substantial logging industry of its own.” Reid noted.

“Yeah, tell that to all the closed paper mills up North. That will make you some friends.” You retorted bitterly.

“Of course, you would understand the losses in the forestry industry since you attended school here.” Spencer confirmed. “It wasn’t that the source had dried up, or the need gone away. It was that greed had beat the American worker.” He quoted an economics paper you wrote your junior year.

You were taken aback, speechless. This was even slightly touching that this esteemed colleague had bothered to consider your past. He looked at you sideways, gauging your reaction to his famous eidetic memory. But your eyes were focused past his long frame now, watching the unsub storm his way into the breakroom. You gestured from your eyes to the unsub. Reid lead the way to finish the trap that Hotch had set for Davis.

Suddenly, there was a loud shout and an explosion sent you and Spencer across the empty breakroom table. There was glass and plaster everywhere, the pain in your ears was excruciating, luckily you could move. Reid was half on top of you and half on a toppled chair. You couldn’t see his face and with the ringing in your ears make you doubt he could hear you. You tugged on his arm with no response.

Slowly, you sat up, and slid out from beneath his warm body. You hadn’t seen any movement from the manager’s office. It seemed like your life was trapped in stop motion flashes. The fire alarm had been activated and lights were flashing as the sprinklers pelted down on you.

“Y/N,” Spencer grunted slowly coming back to you. You held his wrist to check his pulse, not wanting to invade his space anymore, again, so soon. “Hotch?” he asked.

You nodded and scrambled away into the room that held your boss.

“Hotch!” You screamed, your throat coarse from the fear and the sediment in the air. There was no response. Your team’s voices were suddenly on the coms.

“Talk to me, Y/N.” Derek pleaded.

“Reid and I are conscious. Send medics to the breakroom. There was a minor explosion. I am looking for Hotch now.” You relay to the whole team. “Any visual on Kyle?” You remember there was more to the mission today.

“We have him,” JJ answered, “Alive.” You could hear the relief in the female agent’s voice.

“Well done guys,” You wiped a tear from across your cheek. You had needed that good news right now. There was a slight movement up ahead, a desk was being slid across the floor. You raised your Glock and called out, “Freeze, keep your hands where I can see them!”

The movement stopped. A stifled voice called out, “Y/L/N, there was a closet, I think Davis got away,” Hotch called. You turned to check where Reid was, he was staggering toward the fallen desk that hid where Hotch lay.

You barreled through the remaining debris, into the unhinged closet door, falling over the clearly dead store manager. Through the doorframe, you saw a crawl space following the length of the entire building. You double check behind you, no surprises. Your heart is racing, your ears are ringing and your adrenaline is through the roof. You whisper over the coms. “Suspect Davis fled on foot after the explosion. Believed to be in store skeleton walkways. Please send back up. Agent Y/L/N in pursuit.”

You weave in and out of the concrete and steel framework of the building. Your ears are clearing, but no sound has reached you. You have no idea where the unsub is. The unheated space is wet and icy in patches on the concrete floor. You shiver from the sprinkler remnants on your skin. Wisconsin winters were not something you had missed. You keep your head up, but move slower than you would like to be.

A chain rattles in the distance. ”Brandon Davis!” You bellow, gun raised, certain and clear headed. “Come out with your hands up!”

A rhythmic clanking noise began, a door opened suddenly and you see it, just ahead. A loading door is opening and Davis is driving one of the store’s forklifts. You repeat, “Brandon Davis! This is the FBI!”

“Park the vehicle and come out with your hands up!” Suddenly Reid is behind you and all of Milwaukee PD seems to be waiting on the other side of the service door. The spots blind the unsub. He holds up his hands, you get to make the arrest. Spencer’s face is bleeding and his clothes are a mess. He backs you up as you climb the forklift and cuff the predator.

“Okay, okay. But seriously, what were you guys doing when Davis was blowing up Hotch?!” Derek joked eyeing Spencer and you affectionately.

You were all in the waiting room. Hotch was being discharged, just a leg sprain with cuts and bruises on the side. Everyone had inquired about his ears, but his hearing appeared to be no worse than usual. Hotch was the agent that just kept going. Reid picked at the bandage on the left side of this face. You were sad that this was your first time in the field alone and he had gotten hurt. No one had seen it coming, but a hardware store would contain many variations of ingredients for cheap explosives. Davis had been ready for anything. You blamed yourself, but you knew Spencer was more logical than you were. The way he thoughtfully looked at you now, told you he wasn’t upset.

You realized that the team was still waiting for you to answer Derek and here you were staring into a different pair of brown eyes. “Discussing 21st century Rustbelt economics,” you finally answered.

Rossi shook his head and patted you on the back. “You know, kid, if it were anyone else giving me that line, I wouldn’t believe them. But with you two, that is the only explanation.”

Everyone laughed.

“I do have a question,” Spencer began, “What would one do in Wisconsin on a Sunday night?” His brown eyes teasing, the other members of the team wouldn’t remember your alma mater was here. Let alone the one thing you did miss about Wisconsin winters…

Thirty minutes later, the BAU was crammed into the closest bar, watching Sunday Night Football starring the world famous Green Bay Packers. Luckily, for Morgan, they were not playing the Bears that night. You would hate to see a grown man cry from such devastation, after all.

JJ approached you with another cold beer, “You know,” she sat down next to you. “Spence took me to a Redskins game once.” This revelation floored you, you just shook your head in amazement. “He was gifted the tickets and had absolutely no interest in the game.” JJ chuckled at the memory.

“I can imagine, JJ. But, um, why are you telling me this?” You asked staring at the blonde’s concerned face.

“Because, it is a big deal that he figured out that you like football. It’s not something that has come up in the field. Look, Y/N, the Redskins game was eight years ago. Way before Will, and well, of course before Maeve.” JJ paused, seeing if where she was headed had sunk in yet. The name Maeve was only spoken with quiet reverence amongst the team. Garcia had filled you in early on, as no one would dare to talk about her in front of Reid. Frankly, you were too new to even think about asking more questions about them. That she was coming up, was a bit much for the fun filled evening you had anticipated.

“Okay, whoa. Let’s back up.” You made a time out and a reversal signal at JJ, drunk you even talked with your hands. “I am honored, Reid thought about me while we were still in town. But today was possibly the first day I didn’t want to suffocate his geeky ass since joining the team. The fact that we both could have died, might be the saving grace here. I am not trying to make any moves here. I am just trying to get along with the whole team.”

JJ watched your over dramatic explanation, hiding a smile. “Okay, Y/N, I hear you.”

“Yeah, we all hear you!” Barged in a slightly drunk Morgan. “We could just profile you and leave it obvious to everyone in the bar.” You playfully punched him in his meaty shoulder, which you instantly regretted. He laughed at you. Then you glance down the bar, Reid is drawing plays on a napkin and talking at length to an old trucker who is very kindly listening to the doctor’s sound strategies. The pen in his long fingers distracts you, it has been chewed on.

You gulp down your pint of beer, thinking maybe this wasn’t a good idea after all you had been through with the case. You make your way outside to call Garcia, despite the biting chill in the air. You hate that she isn’t here with the team, celebrating her victory.

“Sugar, I am in need of beauty sleep!” Penelope mumbles on the other end. You picture her in her ridiculous sleep mask and silken pajamas; you smile in spite of your panic attack in progress.

“Penny, I think he has my pen.” You start to cry and even you, a professional profiler, don’t understand why.

“Okay, love, but is this really worth crying about? Or is this the type of drunk you are?” Garcia asked curiously, “No, not a sad girl drunk, not you!” She teased.

“Stop it!” You begged. “Spencer has my pen from when he pissed me off the night before we left.”

“Okay… but since when do you call him Spencer?” Garcia was too good at this.

“Stop profiling me! I am scared. Alright? I can’t be the one to come after her, Garcia, I can’t live up to that!” You gasped at your realization. You were scared and that wasn’t the worst of it. You knew Hotch would kick you off the team if you did anything to mess with Reid, because that would truly hurt the team.

“Honey, honey, no one is asking you to! I mean have you even talked to Reid?” Garcia’s insight steering you straight yet again.

“No, just JJ. And Morgan, but I am never sure when he means what he teases.” You sniffled.

“Do you like Spencer, Y/N?” She just said it, clear as day.

You shook your head and pulled your coat tighter against the cold night. A loud chorus erupted from the bar, signaling a touchdown for Green Bay.

“Probably,” was all you could muster. You thought about sleeping in his coat, how warm and safe his scent made you feel. How his quirks made you watch others more closely, making you a better agent. You thought about delicate fingers and his ridiculous Halloween costumes. He was brilliant and somehow surpassed all the guys you had loved before and couldn’t have because of your insecurities. How had you not seen how you had been so closed off to the possibility?

“Oh, my God, Penny. What am I going to do?” You beseeched your closest friend, “I care about the Doctor!”

A slight gasp came from somewhere near the bar’s entrance. You could not turn around. You would not. Garcia was cheering on the other end of the phone and you were frozen in place. Slowly you turned on the spot, forcing this tense moment to end.

Spencer Reid was staring at you from about eight feet away. His breath coming in small puffs of steam. His dark P-coat making him look like more of a Burberry Ad than a renowned scholar. You unceremoniously hung up on Garcia. She would find out about whatever was about to happen, eventually. You stood, shivering and scared watching your coworker watch you. Where was an unsub with explosives now? Why couldn’t you clear your head to make a complete thought come out of your mouth?

“The game is over, your guys won it.” Spencer spoke first, clearly his sports lingo off a little. You smiled, finally exhaling.

“Good, JJ owes me twenty bucks.” You replied, without looking away from his squinting concern. You took a few steps forward and decided it was now or never, all or nothing.

“So, Doctor,” emphasizing the nickname, knowing he wouldn’t be able to deny what he had heard now, “Did you have a good time in the dairy state?”

“Yes, though, of course, technically California produces far more milk than Wisconsin does. Y/N, you know how I love dairy.” Spencer smiled at you, his hands hidden in his pockets, shaking. “I’m the reason we haven’t worked together in the field more.”

That was not where you thought this conversation was headed. “What do you mean?”

“I asked Hotch for some space from you, after Albuquerque.” He was using his very matter-of-fact voice, though the tone usually provided much more information with it.

“But, why?”

“Because you make me uncomfortable.” Spencer declared “And I know sometimes you do it on purpose; just to watch me squirm.”

You panic in an entirely new way.

“I am so sorry, I didn’t know I affected you so much!” Your voice was catching in your throat. You had already been drunk crying and now you were being told that you made someone you care about feel awful for at least the past twenty-three days. You continued forward towards the bar’s entrance which was letting a steady flow of post-game fans out. But you had to walk passed him, your heart now destroyed. You moved as if cement was strapped to your boots. You made it passed this tall, infuriating, sweet man and were almost inside, but curiosity stopped you.

“If I make you so uncomfortable, why did you take my germ-infested pen?” You nearly spat the words at him. You felt like an open wound: unstable, oozing and vulnerable to further damage. You spun around and to find that he had followed you. Suddenly he was in front of you, all six feet and curly hair of him was now inside your bubble. His hand had found its way to your elbow, gently holding you, not pressing. You stared up at him, challenging him. His mouth twitched and his eyes refocused on your furrowed brow.

“It had rolled off your desk the other night. I couldn’t just set it back on your files with the floor all over it too. So, I went to wash it off and in the process I may have overheard you talking to Garcia about becoming a workplace shooter.” Spencer sighed, was he embarrassed? You were the one who was being a jerk that night.

“And you ended up pocketing the pen as you went back to your desk… I am an ass, Spencer, I am so sorry.” You plead at him, gripping his jacket sleeve for support.

“Hardly, Y/N, but I think you need to be more honest with yourself. Especially about me, it would make everyone more comfortable around us both.”

Spencer’s eyes were kind and in this moment you remembered that this angel faced man is actually older than you. His social awkwardness did not make him immature, it is was what makes him Spencer, your Doctor. You have been the one being immature this entire case.

“Oh, God, they all know. Don’t they?” You lean into Spencer and grab the buttoned opening to his jacket.

“Know what, Y/N?” He looks down at you, slightly amused.

You draw in a deep breath and look directly into those inquisitive eyes, knowing this moment could change your life forever.

“The team knows that I, Agent Y/L/N, am attracted and emotionally tied to you, Doctor Spencer Reid,” you say it, clearly, calmly and honestly. Your heart is racing, the air between you two is full of clouded breathes and clarity. He smiles, not his typical smile, but a wide glowing grin. His warm hand reaches up to your face and gently brushes your hair behind your ear. Your breath catches at the intimate gesture.

“Thank you, Y/N, for your honesty,” he leans down and whispers it in your ear. He rubs circles on your cheek with his thumb and suddenly you are undone. You leap on to your tiptoes and pull him towards you. Your mouths crash in clouds of warmth. His soft lips caress yours, you feel unstoppable. But was he always this tall? You worry about straining his neck or messing up his bandaged face and all too quickly break the kiss off, self-consciously. And wait. Because an honest declaration deserves an honest response. He didn’t back away or drop his long hand from your face. He pursed his lips and smiled gently down upon you. “I, Doctor Spencer Reid, really like you Y/N Y/L/N.”

You smile, no, you beam up at this amazing guy. Squeezing him in a tight embrace, you bury your face in the wool of his coat, drinking in his scent. His hands softly play with the strands of your hair.

A long cat-call whistle rips through the air around you, startled you both spin. And a chorus of hoots, hollers and applause fill the air. The BAU had been escorted out of the closing bar and into the brisk night air. Blushing you drag Spencer to the SUV that the only other sober agent, Hotch will be driving back to the jet.

Original Posted 2017

Updated/Edited 5/28/21

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Something every woman should know - WHY MEN LIE!

GUEST:

If there is one thing I have learned in the last two years in the cryptocurrency world, it’s that things change so quickly in this sector, it can humble anybody. Anyone who says he knows what he is talking about, doesn’t!

Still, it’s New Year’s Day, so what the heck? I’ll put my neck out there with 12 predictions for 2018:

1. Ripple will lose its luster

People will realize that Ripple is a cool business but that it doesn’t actually require a protocol token to work. There are a number of other protocols (including some VERY high market cap ones) that also don’t require a token to work.  The market will start to weed them out. That said, Ripple will be a valuable company because of the service it provides. It just won’t be a valuable protocol. The protocol multiples are much higher. Disclosure: I previously owned XRP, but don’t hold any now.

2. The Lightning Network will face the big test

Either Lightning will work and Bitcoin will regain its prominence as THE default cryptocoin in the world, or it will fail miserably and Bitcoin will continue to fall further and further behind as a coin of relevance. If that happens, Bitcoin Cash becomes the “real” Bitcoin.

To me, it’s a coin toss. I’m playing catchup on this one as I sold a lot of my BCH when it came out in favor of BTC, thinking SegWit2x would happen, but I was wrong. Ouch.

3. The privacy wars will begin as people recognize the difference between pseudonymity and anonymit

When they do, the competition will intensify for adoption of a “privacy” coin like

Zcash (disclosure: They’re a client and I’m biased)

Monero (which seems to be the privacy coin of choice on the Dark Web).

Dash has amazing marketing (Amanda B. Johnson is probably the best in the business) but questions abound about the reputation of some of the leadershp team, weaknesses within the masternode setup and possibly even legal implications.

PIVX which has a fun team and is really fast plus can integrate with Slack.

I predict that one or two of these coins will be recognized as the next Bitcoin within the mainstream media. There are a lot of factors here that will determine the winner, but I it will come down to whose security mentality is superior. We’ll only know that after a few big attacks.

4. The DAO market will take off

The DAO market, currently led by companies like Aragon, Colony, District0x, and DAOStack — will soon have a few proof-of-concept DAOs running. It’ll be interesting to hear the metrics they report in terms of set up time, user base, types of activities/DAOs in operation, etc. These protocols have massive opportunity (as I wrote previously on VentureBeat), though the vision in this market may be way ahead of the tech.

If there are 50 or so legit projects in pilot in 2018, then this sector is on a fast pace. I’m planning a pilot DAO of my own, by the way, so I’ll be updating readers about what the process looks like from the inside.

5. More decentralized AI startups will emerge

Last month, blockchain-based AI-as-a-Service startup SingularityNet’s ICO sold out in 60 seconds, pulling in $36 million. It set the $36 million cap after receiving requests for $360 million worth of its tokens from investors. There will be more ICOs like this one. Since money attracts money, we will see a lot of people leaving high priced AI jobs at big tech firms like Google and Facebook to pursue billion-dollar paydays at the next crypto-AI protocol. We will probably see 10 crypto AI ICOs that are at least $50 million. For more on decentralized AI, see my earlier article here.

6. Ethereum will be the standard … or not

By now, we all know that CryptoKitties brought the Ethereum network to its knees. Ethereum cofounder Vitalik Buterin knows it too and is very aware of the challenges he and his team face.

I had the opportunity to spend time with Buterin and Ethereum developer Vlad Zamfir a few weeks ago, and — although I think the “Vitalik as Wunderkind” narrative is dangerous — I walked away from our conversation very impressed. These two are very thoughtful, articulate, open-minded, and brilliant. There are a ton of things that need to be done to prepare Ethereum to handle the scale and speed the community will need (as I have outlined before), but these two are both smart and humble enough that they could do it.

That said, with all of Ethereum’s issues, there is room for other, newer blockchains like NEM, QTUM, EOS, or AION to start closing the gap, if not overtake the platform. If we see more than 100 projects built on any one of those platforms, I think we’ll be seeing the emergence of an Ethereum contender. If not, Ethereum will keep its hold on the lead.

7. Interoperability protocols will remain immature

I’m rooting for interoperability players — like Polkadot, Cosmos and new entrants like Lamden and Metronome — that will enable transactions and information exchanges between different blockchains. But I think it will be a while before they really get off the ground. In the long term, they’ll enable a multi-blockchain world. But in the short term, they’ll increase the load on key blockchains like Ethereum and Bitcoin and so won’t likely get much love from those communities just yet. I expect them to be a bit quiet for the time being. For more on this sector, see my earlier story.

8. We’ll see more Crypto Valleys beyond Zug

I lead a quarterly trip to “Crypto Valley” in Zug, Switzerland as part of the Crypto Explorers Association. The next one is January 29, which is sold out, but applications are open for the April trip. See the site for details.

We’ve been approached by governments in places like Oman and Panama that want to set up Crypto Valleys in their geographies and use CryptoExplorers as a way of introducing themselves to the world. They have studied what Zug has done to drive innovation and job creation and they want to do that themselves.

That tells me governments in tier 2 or tier 3 locations see blockchain/crypto as a way to “leapfrog” tier 1 economies in the way Estonia did in the 1990s, going straight to a digital first country. (You can read about my experiences as an e-citizen of Estonia here.)

These new Crypto Valleys will try to become blockchain-first locations. And I think we will see two or three of them make it. I’m not talking about Dubai, Singapore, Tel Aviv, or Berlin. I’m talking about unexpected places like Bratislava, Florianopolis, Panama City, and Muscat.

9. Crypto will go mainstream

Three of the top 10 retail brokers in the U.S. will allow you to buy 1-5 cryptocurrencies directly from their websites, just as you do today with stocks or mutual funds. Coinbase, currently the most popular exchange for crypto newcomers, only supports four currencies at the moment. Unless it wants to start losing ground, it will need to improve its infrastructure and execute a plan for world domination.

10. ICOs will go mainstream

I think we will see the first legitimate ICOs take place on Indiegogo in February, or March at the latest. I predict that, over the course of the year, we will see at least nine more, for a total of 10 in 2018. (Here is Indiegogo’s original announcement.)

11. Reverse ICOs will intensify

Kik did the first reverse ICO; now YouNow is about to do one. I think we’ll see at least 15-20 more reverse ICOs in 2018. A “reverse ICO” is when an existing company decentralizes itself and issues tokens to its members to stimulate a circular economy. This is as opposed to a ICO from a brand new startup project. All this activity will require the services of a new type of professional — the tokenization consultant — so expect to see that role catch on in 2018, too. For more on reverse ICOs, see here.

12. Regulation will get more serious

I’m cautiously optimistic U.S. authorities will be relatively lenient on blockchain startups so as not to impede innovation. But companies that are negligent or outright deceptive will get shut down. ICOs will have to adhere to KYC/AML policies, and their solutions will have to scale. If you look at SEC Chairman Jay Clayton’s letter from December 12, he is pretty clear about the importance of crypto-innovation, and he deserves credit for that. But he is also putting decentralized projects on notice, saying essentially that ignorance of the law is not a defense. I think this is a healthy balance.

The bottom line: If you thought 2017 was crazy, get ready for a lot more upheaval in 2018. This crypto thing is just getting started. Happy New Year!

Jeremy Epstein is CEO of Never Stop Marketing and author of The CMO Primer for the Blockchain World. He currently works with startups in the blockchain and decentralization space, including OpenBazaar, IOTA, and Zcash.

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[rosheendubh]

Just putting this link (and my response) here...

…as an example of when Tumblr goes weird, and how lost in the translation of social media does tongue-in-cheek become taken as a personal insult. I ought to have left my own commentary in my own tag-line. Not the comment roll, obviously. And, while this will probably add fuel to the flaming, (or, more likely, be totally ignored, which is fine bc this topic doesn’t need more attention than the diatribe I’ve voiced below), I’ll make one effort to add a little depth here.

https://art.blognook.com/2017/07/13/die-rosastrassechicagosavantdie-rosastrasseedward/

As I vaguely understand, your PreRaphaelites were not about revolutionizing the state of women, nor breaking down social barriers of the time. They were about challenging the traditional art world of the time, and revolutionizing conventions of theme, form, style, etc. Some of that “rebellion” came in the ‘daring’ motifs of how they utilized their female models to embody the themes of the grand tragedies, myths, legends, and histories, mostly of the Western canon, from the classical civilizations to the Renaissance awakenings. In the short span that the PreRaphaelites thrived, their female models, the way they were deployed in whatever character mold they were posed–amid sweeping, dramatic backgrounds as they wove spells to wreak vengeance upon enemies  and faithless lovers; or, charmingly reclined in havens of flowery meadows and enclosed gardens–unintentionally, I presume, acquired the paradoxical contrivance of Victorian-era Womanhood, trapped in the complex of Madonna-Whore.

It takes more nuance than I have time or patience to explore, and there are loads of articles abounding on the complexities of moral theme, and social commentary, reflected in the PreRaphaelite paintings.  That being said, the dichotomy existing between the two icons most common in these paintings–the provocative, dangerous Femme Fatale versus the demure, modest/passive Innocent Beauty– were duplicated in the landscapes, which were meant to mirror the disposition embodied by the female subject. That was one of the genius revelations of PreRaphaelites, to unite the symbolisms of geography, nature, and human subject together in the way they composed their ultimate canvass.

The other stroke of brilliance was the subtle, and sometimes not so subtle, message imposed upon Victorian woman who viewed these paintings. They were lessons of what society desired of female nature (gentle, innocent, modest, virtuous, and obedient), and what happened to women when they strayed from the righteous path of gendered convention. Rebels who chaffed against the constraints of Victorian social hierarchies, including those women who sought to subvert the 19th century codes of politics and law that relegated women to a status of lesser human, wholly dependent upon a male for any sort of legal/professional status, were in danger of the doom awaiting the FemmeFatales and Fallen Women of the PreRaphaelite paintings. Tragedy, grief, madness, death, etc, was the ultimate fate of these dark Magdalenes who broke from the Domestic Goddess sphere so enumerated as the end virtue of Victorian Femininity.

The chigger comment, and the somewhat caustic tone of the observation regarding the paintings, was not a slur directed at either the person who posted the three gorgeous paintings referenced, nor a slam on the actual artwork…despite it being taken as such.  I can’t account for generational or translational/linguistic differences in how a sardonic, tongue-in-cheek comment becomes taken personally, especially when a post is composed on a public social media platform, which is available to equally public admiration, observation, critique, any and all of the above. That being said, I concede our perspectives of art–paintings, poetry, literature, etc–are influenced by so many things. From our background/real world personal lives and experiences, to age/generation and travels beyond our comfort zones, to encountering different peoples from various walks of life where you are forced to interact with them in the world beyond cyberspace, to our depth of education, and personal hobbies/interests.  Maybe the person who posted this is still in a stage where idealism is totally appropriate, and that will certainly come out in the adoration of paintings that embrace exactly that perspective. That’s totally fine, but realize, as I noted in another perceptive commentor’s reblog further down the reBlog roll (and curiously, no longer existing on said reBlog roll), everyone is entitled to voice an opinion, and it is entirely possible to both admire beautiful artwork, and still be critical of its more insidious history.  That’s how I perceive these pictures, bc behind the beauty, and fantasy idealism, there’s a harsher reality, whether we’re talking chiggers (mind you, tongue-in-cheek comment there), or an off-hand remark about these paintings reminding me of more modern masculine views portraying how stereotyped women spend their “leisure hours” (that would be the analog to the Victoria’s Secret lingerie slumber parties, and the bondonka-donk statement which was made).

Even without that modern parallel, the true imposition of darkness belying these paintings, for all their pastel pastoralism, is the paradoxical reality of most contemporary Victorian women’s lives.  Bleak, stark, and brutal. Struggling against constant woes of abusive husbands, an endless litany of pregnancies, early child mortality (1/5 babies didn’t make it to 12 mos of age, and your average Victorian era working class/poor woman probably birthed, on average, every 2-3 years, from menarche to menopause, if she lived that long), the high rate of maternal mortality, surviving beneath workplace/labor rights exploitations as the Industrial Age steamrolled everyone in it’s path, (and this recounting could probably continue as nauseum, but we’ll stop there for now), who wouldn’t have wanted to escape the drudge of daily existence, even if only for a few moments, in their imagination, by viewing the gorgeous tranquility evoked in these paintings?  Who today, especially working women, both raising families, trying to maintain jobs/professions, one the other, or both, still doesn’t desire that? Only, I’m guessing the kind of woman I’m characterizing, from the bottom-barrel, working/poorer class Victorian society rarely ever had either the time, awareness, or means to access the places where these paintings were displayed. And as for the more middle-class/upper-middle class, conventional daughter/wife/mother of the Victorian age, it would be interesting to have some notion of how they viewed these works of the PreRaphaelites. Mostly because, the more daring and controversial of the Femme Fatale/Fallen Women portrayals, as I understand, were actually not considered suitable for “decent” women to observe. The reason: because the female mind might be provoked into “untoward passions” that were embodied in some of the darker-themed essences of PreRaph pictorials.  Sex, murder, death, vengeance–not exactly suitable for the fragile and excitable female mind, as the psychology, even the physiology, of women was understood by the Victorians.

The gender politics of the time encouraged women to remain mentally and emotionally immature girls in women’s bodies, and it’s difficult to deny that the male dominated art world, however inadvertently, didn’t play into that perception of social morality, paralleled in the airy images of innocence, where nubile ladies lounged in gauzy dresses all day, in a safe sphere of controlled nature.  This same Victorian world beheld the powerful images of sorceresses and rebellious queens with an ambivalence of attraction and disgust–women who claimed their own autonomy--and they threatened the order of civilized gentility with chaos and destruction. That was the exact same polemic communicated by 19th century Victorian era sociologists, lawyers, jurists, professors, physicians, magistrates, monarchs, presidents, etc, when it came to the recognition of women’s rights translated as human rights. And that view justified how the few courageous women who began to muster a resistance by social activism to redress these injustices, were punished by the society of the time, through ostracism, to blatant abuses like mandatory psychiatric hospitalization, and other means of intimidation for the purpose of maintaining the spheres of domestic and public order the Victorian middle and upper-classes believed were necessary for right and proper society. A place for every person, and every person in their place.

That’s the story of the entire 19th century, washing us up into the progressive era tumult, and political/social/labor reforms of the early 20th century, as women advocated, not only for themselves, but many others who had experienced the 19th century oppressions of racism, sexism, and work place abuses. That’s neither here nor there regarding the spate of (unintended) offense provoked by my comment, other than to say, some viewers’ experience of these paintings goes beyond emotion and into analysis. And as I observe, the women of the Victorian era grew up, and left their “gardens and their gossamer” to take on the reality of existing in the muck and mess of the real world, such as they had already been doing through the entire century, but now they wanted their status as autonomous humans to be officially recognized, and separate from any male oversight, including the rights which would allow them to provide adequately for themselves via access to educational and professional institutions, on par with the rights men had enjoyed for hundreds of years.

I don’t know if that societal upheaval was reflected in the changing tastes of the public for various art-styles. I have read that by the early 20th century, the PreRaphaelite school became something defined in form, theme, and presentation as passé, being looked on by viewers largely as an antiquated semblance of outmoded technique. That doesn’t mean it still wasn’t enjoyed then, or now, for the obvious qualities of the paintings. Perhaps that’s what ought to have been written in that comment scroll, but it seemed too short a space to write what I’m writing here. 

Perhaps the best thing would have been to not say anything at all? But then, what’s the point of posting any kind of work to a public viewed blog if it doesn’t invite some kind of commentary, and what’s the point of posting anything, if the only comments tolerated are those of praise and edification? Its been said that social media–FB posts, Twitter tags, and Tumblr posts–all feed into that human inclination to justify personal ego. Who doesn’t get the dopamine surge from yet another “Like”, or “Reblog”, and continue to check back obsessively to see if the ticket counter went up another “5 Likes” on that awesome post one spent so much time (away from real world responsibilities even), blood, sweat, and tears to create? Lol, we’ve all been there, and been guilty of it, so whatever pop-science web-blog from whence that conclusion of egotism originated, maybe they’re right…

Anyway, as a last point of concession to the original poster for their admiration of the models in these paintings…hey, you’re right. Absolutely. The women modeling for these paintings, of the PreRaph era were indeed remarkable. Even more so, in my mind, beyond the artists for whom these women played Galatea to the painters’ Pygmalion. However, I would beg to offer a bit of perspective on the reality of anything broaching a life of ease, glamour, or even romantic yearnings such as they magnificently embraced in their modeling. Let’s be honest, the PreRaphaelites would have had no glory if hadn’t been for the women who endured the hours of discomfort, boredom, and sometimes downright near-sadism/torture so their “genius” painters could capture the perfect atmosphere for their canvass. The story of 'Ophelia’, one of the most iconic paintings defining the philosophy of the PreRaphaelites, best typifies perhaps, the tragedy and hopeful despair (that contrary word use was deliberate) that defined the lives of some of these women. The link below provides a more evocative description of Lizzie Siddal, her life, and work. And by god(dess), the near hell she endured just so Millais could create this beautiful, tragic episode of literature into portraiture.

https://www.varsity.co.uk/culture/10008

My admiration for their strength is boundless, because so many voices of women have been lost to history.  And any surviving legacy of these accounts belongs to all of us as women, and men (and these days, any other gender-fluid identity that lies somewhere in between dichotomized sex differentiation. At the end of the day, I’m glad we live in the 21st century, despite all the chaos of our world right now, it is still better for a vast majority of people than it has ever been in recorded epochs).  So, I don’t contend that these women weren’t admirable in their own right. I do wish to clarify, nothing in the Infamous Chigger Dialogue was a slur against the women themselves. It was a slur on stereotype, and masculine artists’ points of view, coincident with the highly masculine-dominated world of the Victorian era in which they created their masterpieces, graceless as I came across in my verbal barrage of “chiggers” and “bondonka-donks”.  I will suggest tentatively though, that the last thing on Lizzie Siddal’s mind, after completing her hours in preparation for posing as Ophelia, was of donning gossamer robes and reclining in a grassy glen. It was more likely on wishing for a thick, warm blanket and stiff shot of brandy in a hot cup of tea.

Those are the rueful observations my mind makes, knowing the story behind some of these paintings. The PreRaphealite models, their beauty and passion, remain immortalized in works crossing the depths of human feeling, from tranquility, and a yearning for that peaceful meadow in sunlight, to iconic scenes of raw drama, violence, and the passion of forbidden love.  The best modern day equivalent reflecting this perhaps, is from that recent pop song lyric, “there’s pain in beauty, and beauty in everything…” (Or something approximated to that lyric…I don’t pay much attention to pop music, but that lyric is quite figurative). So, I’ll let that stand as my sober admission of guilt for the offense perceived in the Tragic Tumblr TakeDown of PreRaphaelite Nymphs, and the Errant Chigger Pube Bite.  Especially for the Nony to consider, who sent that lovely mail, claiming “I talk a lot of shit”. Well, as you said–here’s the “shit”. I can but deliver the goods. I am half-joking on that, btw. Honestly, Nony, I’m not offended. Saddened a bit, that you didn’t have the confidence in your stance to not have to resort to “anonymous” in order to express your sentiments. I don’t really get offended, and I often try to give the benefit of the doubt in understanding where someone is coming from in their own strong reaction, in the few times I’ve cyber-slipped.  And really, they have been quite few, as I don’t look for Tumblr to be my sounding board of conflict. I’m sure, Nony, you don’t either, even in mis-spoken observances of truly lovely art-pieces.

Again, all Art is a reflection of reality, and every person will have a different opinion on certain works based on their own life’s experience. No one opinion is any less valid than any other. I will apologize for having stated my tongue-in-cheek chuckle in your blog comment section. Better to have added it in my own tagline where it wouldn’t have been visible unless someone cared to look. It’s not personal. Your post possessed a classic grace.

So, despite the yearning, peace, or nostalgia such scenes provide us, I, at least, find both admiration in the emotion, the provocative message of certain scenes, while I can also laugh at how not like reality these paintings ever resemble. That’s why we enjoy them, and It’s okay to be a little skeptical, and even examine them with a bit of humorous irony.  I work in medicine, as my own frame of reference from the real world. I see the result of what happens way too often when people’s idea of the “fantasy” fails to match the reality of particular situations, and the resulting consequences medicine is then left mopping up. Thus, I tend to approach almost all artwork from the baseline of Maslow’s hierarchy, and work up from there, where the subject of the piece characterizes “genius” or “Darwin Award”.. In other words, from art’s viewpoint, it totally accomplishes its objective in me, by making me completely sympathize  with the human subject (and puzzle over what they were thinking) in the act of a painting coming to fruition. Interpret that as one may, I can’t apologize for how my personal syntax might be persevered.

Lordy, typing this piece of verbal flatulence stole hours of my life never to be returned. It had to be said though…even if only in my side blog…cheers!

[mindthump]

15 Things Men Say That Get on Women's Nerves http://ift.tt/2ngHJSL

When it comes to communication between men and women there’s a lot of misunderstandings. Even if the right words are being used, the vocal cues aren’t. For example, forcing your child to apologize. Sure. They’ll angrily exclaim “I’m sorry,” but it’s definitely not sincere.

Guys, even if you’re not trying to make women angry, embarrassed or uncomfortable, there’s a very good possibility that you will because men communicate differently than women. In most cases, I find that no matter the woman (my wife or women that I know) I'm making them uncomfortable without realizing it. 

However, if you’re aware of this fact, you can start correcting the problem so that there aren’t any misunderstandings. And, you can start by avoiding these words or phrases.

1.“Calm down.”

As most women will inform you, these are probably the most condescending and anger-producing words in the English language. Truly, the worst that you can ever say.

When a man says these words to a woman, it’s pretty much like adding fuel to the fire. You're implying she’s not in control of her emotions, which in turn makes her feel self-conscious and even more-enraged. Meanwhile, it shows that you are saying that you, the man, are the wise and rational one.

Instead of telling a woman to “calm down,” ask her sincerely what’s going on.

Related: 4 Words That Reinforce the Gender Gap at Work

2. “You look really tired today.”

I don’t care who you are, nobody looks their best when they’re tired, and they probably have the grouchy mood to go with their unkempt physical appearance. Pointing out that someone is tired is implying that they look awful.

If you don’t know everything that’s going on in her life, ask her. It’s a better approach than making her feel uncomfortable about her physical appearance, and it demonstrates that you’re concerned.

3. “What is it now?”

“This conveys impatience and anger about what is probably her bid for connecting with you,” says John Gottman, Ph.D. “Every attempt she makes to connect with you is an opportunity to turn toward her need and connect emotionally.”

Instead of being impatient or angry over her concerns or questions, ask her what’s on her mind.

4. “Wow! You look great. How much weight have you lost?

This is a well-meaning comment which you probably meant as a compliment. However, it suggests that the woman was either unattractive or overweight in the past. Never make those implications by comparing a woman to how she looked in the past. Just simply tells her that it's nice to see her.

5. “You ate that whole thing?”

This is a contender for most embarrassing statements that you can make to a woman, even if you’re just in awe because she weighs 110 pounds and ate more wings than you did. To her, she hears that you think she has a eating problem or should be ashamed in some way because she was hungry.

On the flip side, also avoid, “Is that all you’re going to eat?”. You don’t control what and how much a woman should eat. (Or the amount or content of what anyone "should" eat.)

Related: 3 Ways to Listen Better and Become a More Effective Communicator

6. “Moist.”

According to a study conducted by an underwear company Knix Wear, “moist” is the most cringeworthy and disliked word to women.

“People have a really visceral reaction” to the word, says Paul Thibodeau, PhD, a language psychologist at Oberlin College. “They cringe immediately, so they think it’s the sound of the word that’s triggering it.”

However, the real source of people’s discomfort with this word may be because of the associations it has with sex and bodily functions. While women aren’t as grossed out when followed after food-related words, such as cake, people also dislike synonyms like “damp,” “wet,” and “sticky.”

In short, avoid using this word as much as possible and use alternatives like “humid” or “watery.”

7. “You should smile more often.”

I’m sure that you’ve witnessed men say this to women, even if they’re total strangers. Let’s be honest here, a woman doesn't owe you a smile whenever she’s in your presence. As Erika Henderson states perfectly, “The sexualization behind telling women to smile is alarming. It makes women feel that we are only meant to be happy and pretty and it’s a passive way to engage into an unwanted conversation.”

8. “That’s not very ladylike.”

Here’s the definition of “ladylike;” “appropriate for or typical of a well-bred, decorous woman or girl.” Do we apply Victorian standards to women these days? I don’t think so. Women don’t have to wear a dress to an interview or when in the workplace. Pantsuits are completely acceptable and professional. So are jeans and sneakers.

Telling a woman that she’s not “ladylike” perpetuates sexist notions by playing into certain social rules and can lower their self-esteem. Don't make anyone feel ashamed for who they are.

9. “You look great for your age.”

This is another statement that may have good intentions, but it comes across (and is) as condescending and rude. Just simply say that they “Look great.” Easy peasy. Remember, if you’re compliments are genuine, they won’t require a “for you” qualifier.

Related:  How Smart People Handle Difficult People

10. “Actually, that’s not a word” or “Actually, that’s now how that’s done.”

Saying this a public setting is patronizing and embarrassing. That’s not to say that we can never joke around with a girlfriend or correct a colleague. There’s just a time and place for that and it's not when you're out to dinner with friends or during a meeting.

11. “Listen.”

Starting your remarks off with “Listen” implies that she wasn’t listening and you’re now ordering her to pay attention to what you have to say, and her only role is to play the listener.

12. “That’s a man’s job, let me do that.”

First off, what exactly is a “man’s job?” Sure, there are jobs that have more men employees, like manual labor or entrepreneurship. But, if it’s acceptable for men to have jobs that were previously considered a “woman’s job,” like teaching or nursing, then the same can be true for women. It should be about talent, passion and experience, not gender.

Outside of the workplace, does this mean moving furniture or fixing the toilet? I know lots of men who can't do either job and plenty of women who can. Don’t assume that a woman is incapable of doing something because it’s perceived as a “man’s job.” Whoever can do the job, it's their job to do.

13. “At least I never ____ .”

This is a phrase that we use to deflect attention from ourselves whenever we made a mistake. Instead of admitting and owning the mistake, we bring up the past -- which is completely irrelevant at this moment.

We all make mistakes in our lives that we’re embarrassed about. But holding that over someone else’s head to make you feel less guilty is immature and just plain dirty.

14. “Why do you always do that?”

No one "always" does anything. Suggesting they do puts them on the defensive because you’re defining them based on one instance. For example, “you always leave dirty dishes in the sink,” is defining her as messy or lazy. Even if that’s happened several times, or all the time, there’s no need to let that frustration build-up. Discuss these issues as they happen instead of making this habit a characterization of her.

15. “Whatever.”

According to 38 percent of Americans, “whatever” is the most annoying word or phrase used in conversations. Nothing gets me fired-up more than when someone tells me “whatever.”

Even if you’re indifferent to a question, it’s important to the other party. If it wasn’t, you wouldn’t have been asked in the first place. Offer your opinion instead of completely dismissing the question.

John Rampton

John Rampton is an entrepreneur, investor, online marketing guru and startup enthusiast. He is founder of the online invoicing company Due. John is best known as an entrepreneur and connector. He was recently named #3 on Top 50 Online Influ...

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