#me and elly: hurting e/o all the time

[borntoocry]

𝐩𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐫                                   e. williams

summary: Ellie and YN walk out to speak to Madelaine. but as mad as madelaine is, and how in love she is with punching people, a little anger leaves YN hurt. 

warnings: violence, blood, vomit. mentions of bones breaking?... 

a/n: low-key don’t know if this will be the last part, maybe I’ll post an epilogue:)  part 4 of 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐦𝐞 | PREV

Your lips were plump, painted crimson like they’d burst open. You were uncomfortable with the clothing you wore. Your underwear felt like you were sitting on Jell-O, your jeans were sticking to your legs as if it were ninety degrees out, and your shirts and jackets were scratching your arms like wool. Maybe it was due to the fact that not even five minutes ago, you were naked with your hand down Ellie’s boxers. Or maybe the flames from the bonfire were slapping your bruised face.

You held onto Ellie’s shirt as she followed Dina towards Madelaine. The girl was sitting next to Jesse, who was obviously seething at the three of you. His eyes were hooded, and his mouth continued twitching as you surrounded them.

Jesse stood up and waved towards Madelaine, almost like he was saying, ‘You can have her.’ He brushed past you and Ellie and stopped at Dina. He placed a hand on her shoulder and whispered–loud enough for you to hear– “Next time, don’t leave her with me. If I could tape her mouth, I would.”

This comment left you in a cloud of questions. How did no one like Madelaine? There had to be someone, right? Someone must have enjoyed her presence, because not everyone knew she was a total monster. You might have quickly found out that she was nothing more than a pretty girl with a cold, black heart, but some people only saw what she offered: a nice smile, a compliment, deceitful conversations.

Dina hated the girl, and Jesse did too. It hadn’t occurred to you until then that Dina and Jesse were close to Ellie, it wasn’t only you. And after you left, they must have pulled Ellie in, learned about her, earned her trust and vice versa. Ellie must have told them about her broken relationship with Madelaine, and they must have hated her for what she did to their friend.

But if they hated it so much, why hadn’t they put a stop to it? Madelaine was abusive and manipulative and everything evil.

You were trying to solve the puzzle that was Ellie and her relationship with both Madelaine and your closest friends. You might have been trying too hard, though, because someone had pulled you out of the clouds… literally.

“Fuck!” you hissed as you realized who it had been. Madelaine had your jacket bawled up in her hands, her face mere inches from yours. You could smell the alcohol in her breath and her spit landing across your cheeks. You tried pushing her away but somehow, at some point, she slid you across the shed. You placed your hands around hers and tried prying.

You looked around, silently begging Dina or Ellie to pull her away. But when you looked at Dina, she shrugged. “You have to hash this out babe.”

You rolled your eyes and threw your head back against the shed door. “Just punch me then,” you said, shutting your eyes so you wouldn’t have to see her face. “If you’re mad, get it out of your system.”

“YN,” Ellie called. “Don’t. Madelaine… just get off her, let’s talk. Please.”

You opened your eyes and stared down at her. She glared up at you, her hands still holding onto your jacket. You let go of her hands and she slowly unclasped hers, but as she did so, her right fist slashed across your face.

As soon as her fist slapped against her side, blood began pouring out of your nose. You clutched onto the tip and cupped underneath your nostrils, catching onto all of the liquid. “Fuck me,” you whispered, dreading the rest of the night. You had already been punched in the nose. She hadn’t broken it at first, but now you were certain she had. The pain pulsated through your head and ran down your body, causing you to double over and vomit.

You were a groaning mess, aching all over: your nose, your head, your throat, your stomach. You just wanted to lie on the grass and sleep away the pain.

You finished throwing up and wiped your mouth, which left your hand smelling of alcohol and iron. You realized then, once again, that your nose was leaking profusely and had yet to stop. Somehow, the force of your heaving rushed the fluid even faster.

You cupped your hand under your nostrils and stood up, turning around to look at the couple you had just ruined ten minutes ago. You tried smirking, but the ghostly color that panned over Ellie’s face left you noticing the taste of iron on your teeth. You immediately shut your mouth.

You glanced at Madelaine, who had moved from her original spot by the shed, now standing next to Ellie, hand grasping her elbow. It was as if they were a happy couple scared by a random psycho.

“Thanks!” you exclaimed. “I think you just broke my fucking nose!”

Madelaine chuckled. There were no emotions running through your brain, no words running down your tongue and bashing against your teeth. You just wanted Ellie to give up on Madelaine and take you to the hospital. Your breathing slowed, your nose was pulsing, along with the rest of your face, and the more you looked at them, the more you wanted to vomit again.

Ellie extended a hand to your face but you stepped back and looked away from her. Your eyes wandered around the backyard full of people, trying to find Jesse and Dina. If Ellie was going to stand by Madelaine’s side and not say a singular word about your hand down her pants, you would leave and find your own way to help your broken nose.

“I need to look for Dina,” you voiced your thoughts. “I won’t stop bleeding, or maybe I stopped, I don’t know, and I need to go before I end up dying on the floor or something.”

“Let me take a look,” Ellie whispered. She was following after your trudges, not letting you escape. You continue to shake your head, but she didn’t care. Her hands found their way to your shoulders and she turned you around. “Let me look,” she said, more sternly this time.

You shut your eyes and allowed her to remove your hand from your nose. She hissed, and you wondered why, because she wasn’t the one who had her nose brutally punched twice.

“I think it is broken,” she said.

You nodded. “Has it stopped bleeding?”

“Yeah.”

“Cool,” you answered, and wiped your wet hand on your jeans. You then opened your eyes to see that Ellie was now turned around, her back to you. You hesitantly looked over her shoulder, watching as Madelaine stared her down.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” Ellie said.

“I know you guys fucked, Ellie!”

Ellie sighed and you didn’t know what to do, so you stepped back and wrapped your arms around yourself. Your chest was being punched by a mysterious force you couldn’t pinpoint. And to save yourself from your body collapsing, you held onto yourself.

Ellie had nothing to say. She wasn’t fidgeting, or rocking on the balls of her feet, or pushing her hair behind her ear. She was looking back at Madelaine. “We were,” she told Madelaine, who instantly turned into a ball of fire. How no one was paying attention to the scene made you question if this was even real. Was this a regular occurrence? The fighting? The yelling? The anger? Was everyone here used to Ellie and Madelaine fighting? The town was small, so everyone must have known one another.

“So you just cheated?” Madelaine shouted. “You’re admitting to being a cheater?”

“I was going to break up with you tonight, Madelaine,” Ellie answered.

“Was?” she continued.

Ellie took in a gasp of air and shook her head. This was where she began fidgeting: moving her feet around, pushing her hair back, popping her fingers. “I am,” she stated. “I am going to break up with you tonight.”

Madelaine was quiet for the first time that night. A tear escaped her eye, then another, and then another until she turned into a sobbing mess. “What?” she cried.

“This was never going to last, Madelaine. Our relationship wasn’t going to last more than two years. I’ve felt pressured to love you, to care for you, to listen to every rude comment you’ve made towards me. I can’t act like I love you and that I’m over YN. So this is it. I’m breaking up with you. This is over.”

You couldn’t take your eyes off Madelaine. Her cheeks were turning a fiery shade of red, just like your nose was, and her hand began to shake. You grabbed onto Ellie’s shirt in case she tried to punch her. And you weren’t wrong–Madelaine balled up her fist and tried slamming it against Ellie’s cheek, but you pulled her back and started walking away. At this point, you didn’t care if she had anything else to say to Madelaine.

“Fuck you Ellie!” she screamed. “And fuck you too you skank!”

You laughed but hissed as soon as the pain shot through your face. You chose to remain silent as you took Ellie inside of the house where Dina and Jesse now were. They were leaning against the kitchen island, both nursing a red SOLO cup.

As soon as they made eye contact with you, Dina ran up to you and pulled you onto a seat. “Oh my god!” She pushed your hair out of your face and inspected your nose and cheeks. “She broke your fucking nose?”

You nodded. “Okay… Jess, can you get her some ice? And Ellie, can you drive us to the hospital?”

She nodded. “You don’t think they’ll say anything about our drinking… and smoking…”

“That doesn’t matter right now. You can get some food from the fridge to wind you down. We need to take her to the hospital and see what they can do. A broken nose is more important than her being intoxicated.”

You remained calm and silent as Jesse placed an ice pack on your nose and you were placed into someone’s car. You said nothing when you got to the hospital and had to fill out paperwork, and you remained silent when they called your name. No one spoke to you, not even Ellie, and you weren’t mad about it. You were desperately craving silence so you could process the night, what would happen tomorrow when you were no longer drunk and high and had a broken nose. You needed silence so you could feel. Because up until this point, voices were clouding the thoughts you were trying to think about.

      Your nose was pushed back into place and now you sat in someone’s car again. You were still silent, even though you sobbed when the doctor shoved your bone into the right spot. Your face was bandaged and there were bruises covering your under eyes. You were a tired and hungry mess but no one bothered to say they were hungry, too. You could wait until tomorrow, but you weren’t really sure if you would have an appetite.

A shoulder pressed against yours and you turned to them, that ‘them’ being Ellie. “You hungry?” she asked, like she could read your thoughts.

You nodded.

“D, YN’s hungry.”

“It’s two A.M. YN, you sure you can’t wait till we get home?”

You shrugged. “It’s fine. I’ll wait.”

“Maybe we should stop by somewhere, Dina. She just got her broken nose shoved back into place, maybe she deserves some fast food.”

Dina sighed and looked through the rearview mirror. Straight at you, like she was either mad or sad. Maybe melancholy. Then she nodded. Two minutes later, you were in a McDonald’s drive-thru, and fifteen minutes later, you were sitting in Dina’s front lawn. A large fry was in your hand, and a twenty-piece chicken nugget box lied between you and Ellie. She picked up a nugget, and you picked up another right after her. You pieced a fry with your nugget and shoved them into your mouth, which somehow happened to be sore.

“I’m confused how this night has ended so badly,” she whispered.

You chuckled a little and looked over at her. She was already looking at you. She looked in love–more than she had ever appeared. It was as if she had fallen in love with you for the first time, but times 100.

“I don’t think it was ever good. It started bad and ended bad,” you said.

She shrugged and scooted closer towards you. She leaned her head onto your shoulder and reached down to your hand. She slowly intertwined her salty fingertips into yours and rubbed her thumb along your skin.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I don’t really know how to explain everything. I’m sorry I didn’t defend you, or reach out to you, or come to you.”

You shook your head and slowly leaned yours onto hers. “I shouldn’t have left you, Ellie. I always loved you. And yes, we needed time apart, that was something that should have always happened; but I shouldn’t have left you without verbal communication.”

“Do you think this will work?” she asked.

“Us?” you asked, confirming what she really meant.

She hummed. “Yes. Us. Will we work out? Will we talk this out and hash out every future issue?”

You hummed as well. “Yes,” you whispered. “I don’t think I want to lose you ever again.”

Ellie slowly pulled her head away and turned to you. She leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss to your lips. It was slow, sweet, and harmless. “You surprisingly don’t taste like blood or vomit,” she said once she pulled away.

You pushed her away and sheathed your smiling face from her. “Fuck you! I forgot about that!”

“It’s good, what do you mean?”

You grabbed a fry and chicken nugget and slammed them into her mouth, shutting her up from any further embarrassment. She ate them in a hurry and quickly hopped over to you. She held your face in her hands and kissed you again, but with intense care. She didn’t want to hurt you. She just wanted to be close to you again.

“I love you,” she whispered. “I don’t care if that’s too soon. I’ve always loved you–even when you were gone.”

You smiled. “I love you too, Ellie. I really do.”

[messy-jin]

Resident InSomnia here!

The post came out much sooner than I expected! How nice! :D

It is crazy how they all fit so well?? You have a great eye for that! I was trying to think of some songs myself, but the inspiration did not hit TT

As for my favorite parts of the post!

Black Or White for William is P E R F E C T. I love especially the "I don't have the answer you want /already set" (? because he is DEFINITELY not following the usual standard (answer c:) for what's wrong or right.

I hadn't thought of that, but Odd Eye for Alfons just seems right. After all, it is about a utopia that does not exist. All the sweet lies and the illusion of a perfect place... again, it just seems right.

OOTD with the "drunken everyday" line– I did NOT expect that, but I LOVE it. I don't know much about Roger, but that fits, and it really made my day jsjjsjs.

Fly High is literally one of my TOP songs from Dreamcatcher. That's why I cannot believe I did not think of how much it fits Ellis??? Everything from the pretty-yet-unsettling vibe, all of the forever / no escape lines, (and the dreaming theme?? I also play in ENG, so there's no route yet, but his curse is certainly related to that). What shocked me the most is how accurate the "if only I could stop time" line is. He has said it so many times, it's literally HIS line (and it's in his JP trailer + the happiest moment thing), so h o w did I not think of that???? It's just brilliant, I love it.

Lastly, Kate! I legit laughed at the "oh, where are you now?" from Mayday, since it really is that way lol (at least until now :^). And with Breaking Out, it would have truly fit better if in the song, the girls had embraced the nightmare instead of escaping it, but that's not what Dreamcatcher's storyline is about lol.

(not talking much Elbert since I already did, but the Medusa theme in Shatter relating to him like that is really sad ;-;)

Thanks for reading all this rant of mine lol. I just really love Dreamcatcher and their music, and I have enjoyed IkeVil so far, especially since I have always loved all that's fairytale-themed (that's why I also play TWST jsjjsjsjsjs).

Hope you have a lovely day or night, and if you are down for it, I'd absolutely love to see more Dreamcatcher related posts!! :D

My dear Resident InSomnia, hello! How are you?

I'm really happy you liked it! I was... Quite inspired. Honestly, I started to write down some notes shortly after the BEcause post and once I was started, I could not stop. Some came naturally, some were more complicated (once again, I struggled with Roger, which is accurate with how I have mixed feelings about him ^^").

Happy that they were all mostly accurate. I guess all of my years doing that with Disney songs payed off!

The big brain energy hit me for William. And I'm glad you found the other songs fitting. I HAD to put Fly High, this underrated bop, and I'm happy I was able to use it for Ellis who is one of my faves (hoping his route will not unsettle me as much as Elbert's did). And I'm happy that my little silly additions made you laugh :D (I also hurt myself with the angst of Shatter for Elbie)

Thank you for sharing your point of view about this and for reading my own rant about Dreamcatcher songs ! My love for this group is infinite.

Oh, you play Twisted Wonderland too? I see you're a person of culture. Same, fairytale themed games for the win!

I'm hesitating over if I should do a Dreamcatcher's songs post but with Ikemen Prince, next time (since I had the idea of Propose for Gilbert). I'll see if I have other ideas popping up on the way. Who knows?

Thank you. I hope you have a great day or night! Don't forget to have a good rest and to stay hydrated!

[salsakiyoomi]

GAHHH OH MY GOD OKAY OKAY first of all holy smokes I love the theme on your blog so much it's so cool and the red is just,,, chefs kiss oh man💗💗🥹!!

OKAY AJAJA would it be alright if I asked for a matchup for Spiderverse (either of the other fandoms work if they're easier/more fun to work with!! I love all of the fandoms there as well ajajja) :O??<3 please take as long as you need with it!!💗🙏

my persona:

name: ellie :D

personality: ENFP/ENTP (but E and I are bound to change depending on how I'm feeling while taking the test BWAHSHSHD so here's another description!!): I'm a generally optimistic person with the sense of humor of an eight year old boy. I will laugh at your mom jokes and then apologize and then make another one😭 I enjoy helping people and creating things, but I do tend to question my morals a lot and wonder why I am helping those people !! I really like the idea of self-improvement and knowing there's always room for more :D reminders are always great too because I forget a lot of things SJDBSJSJHS

zodiac sign: aries!

ideal type: i'm okay with being paired with any gender, no preference! i'm also a minor/highschool student if that helps at all :D (i'm totally on board with platonic matchups as well, i'm unlabeled so for me i can roll along w just about anything!! whatever is easiest GAARAHH). i really admire people who are kind at heart, it doesn't matter how they show it :D i admire people who are humble but not meek, and are willing to speak their minds when it feels right to them OH MAN and I also love people who i can go on and have deep talks with them and fall asleep next to them giggling like im 7 years old at a sleepover every night. OH AJDJSJ and I also love watching shows meant For Literal Children/cartoons because I find them genuinely hilarious and the lessons are always so good 😭🙏 creativity is important to me as well + education for passions :D my giving love language is words of affirmation and physical touch, and my main receiving is acts of service and physical touch! :D

my favorite trope: SHDHDJDJ FOUND FAMILY FOUND FAMILY FOUND FAMILY or any forms of domestic fluff!! 💗💗(sharing a bed and hurt/comfort and being held after a nightmare is my JAM BWAHHS)

favorite season: autumn :)))

hobbies: I absolutely love biology/biomed/environmental science :D! I love going to aquariums and (art) museums and learning about my passions. i definitely want to work at an aquarium as one of those people who give tours to the 3rd graders one day 🥰🙏 I also love listening to instrumental scores from movies!! (I CRIED OVER THE ONES FROM ATSV I AM UNWELL) how to train your dragon and big hero 6 are definitely up there as a few of my favorites :D oh man I also love performing and doing musical theatre for the sake of the community WAHHHSJ,, I love art and writing even though I can get pretty bad writer's block AND OH MAN I love tutoring a lot and going on bike rides when I'm alone !! I love hanging out w people but I also value my alone time as well, and soMETIMES (I AM WORKING ON IT SJXJSJ) I tend to become a doormat where i can't say no and worry about how I am in public places (bUT I HAVE NO PROBLEM DOING PRESENTATIONS WHICH I FIND HILARIOUS SJXNSKJD), but again I SWEAR I am working on it !! =D💗

and the fandom for spider verse would be great :D!! but again anything else is totally okay!!!

OKAHXHSJD IM SO SORRY I WROTE SO MUCH PLEASE DO NOT STRESS YOURSELF OUt ABOUT IT I ALSO THINK YOUR WRITING IS VERY NEAT AND I LIKE IT VERY MUCH AND I AM DEFINITELY GOING TO READ MORE BECAUSE THE STARS W AKAASHI MADE ME MELT. okay that is all have a wonderful day!!! 😭🙏🙏🙏💗💗 take good care of yourself and make sure to sleep well :D!

HONEYMOON MATCHUP WITH : HOBIE BROWN

— honeymoon :

– hobie thinks it's a little funny, honestly, how things turned out with you — the two of you are almost polar opposites, but you know what they say ; opposites attract, and you were his missing puzzle piece — hobie didn't like labels, but there was no denying that he certainly had a thing for you, and you couldn't deny that you liked him either, so you settled in middle ground.

– hobie would come to your place every night — that's how it started, you'd watch a movie or two and once the clock strikes midnight, you find yourself laying in bed with him, huddled up in his arms with your head resting on his chest and his face buried in your hair, the two of you talk about alot of stuff, jumping from one topic to another about completely unrelated things — he likes listening to you talk, likes the sound of your voice and how it immediately soothes him into a good mood — but once the clock nears five am, and you start mumbling and tripping on your words and your eyelids become heavy, he places a soft kiss on your lips, telling you it's time for bed before holding you close and the two of you eventually fall asleep.

– hobie has a knack to convincing you to do things you wouldn't usually do, like going out with him at three am on a supposed 'date' where he takes you to one of the city's highest rooftops with a couple of snacks and the radio playing your favourite songs, he likes to draw and often brings his sketchbook to those dates, so the two of you doodle on the pages, slapping stickers on them and creating a perpetual memory, and he thinks — actually, believes, that no matter what, he'd never forget you, and he has reached a conclusion that maybe, just maybe, he may be in love with you.

— what's on the radio : moonlight, kali uchis

a/n : hello??? kirishimas-manly-eyeliner ?? 😭😭 i used to follow you, i loved your blog sm and you were legit one of my inspirations to write 😭😭 i didn't know you were aware of my blog holy shit, i love you so much 😭 thank you for the request and your ask was so much fun to read like shejwkwk, you're such a nice person help 😭 thank you sm for the request again, ily — also atsv was so good, i cried alot during the moving so you aren't alone, and i loved hobie's animation ! i loved the way they colored him and how he looked like he was out of a panel and the way he changed colors (??) it was so good, he's one of my faves pls 😭 i hope this did you justice and that you like it ! once again thank you sm for the request <33

[atutsie]

Ghosts of the Past

Pairing: Kurou Sakuragawa/Kotoko Iwanaga

TW: Physical/Psychological Abuse, some gore

Summary: Kurou dreams of his childhood.

Beta Reader: @shoujoaccent​

This is set before the two-year time skip. Some fluff and angst between kurokotoko. I hope yall love this! I really enjoyed writing this!

[ageofevermore]

Her House

SUMMARY — It’s not Harry’s house anymore, it’s your daughters.

PAIRING — Dad!Harry Styles x Mom!Reader ( SMAU / 0.4k )

AUTHORS NOTE — Inspired by As It Was BTS because dadrry has my entire heart

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ynstyles: girls day

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gemmastyles: my girl

harryswhore: only here for baby s content

louteasdale: those thighs 😍

ynstyles: @louteasdale obsessed 😫

ynylnstyles: she’s so big 😭

harryshouse71: harry filming ?!

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Harry smiles, watching you tend to your daughter from across the room. You put her down for her afternoon nap an hour ago, hoping she’d sleep for a few hours. Harry smiled knowingly, watching you lift the very awake little girl into your arms. Her small hands, which you kissed a million times a day, now all sweaty from being tucked under her chin, grabbed onto the neckline of your top and your gold necklace chain.

Harry reached out for the both of you, smiling fondly. He took the baby from your arms, pecking your lips and then your forehead when you came close enough. Your daughter, still tired from her lack of nap, laid her head down on Harry’s shoulder, small fingers grabbing at the hair on his neck.

“Missed Daddy?” You cooed, sitting down opposite to them. The concrete floor was cold beneath your thighs, and you shivered a bit. “It’s only been a couple hours.” You scoffed playfully, shrieking in pure adoration when Harry lifted a naked foot in your direction, pretending to kick you away.

“Leave ‘m girl alone.” He teased, nibbling at the baby’s neck with a gentle fondness that you’d only seen him possess with her. Sure, your husbands great with children and he loves them all, but you’ve never seen any love like the one her has for you and her. “Gonna be a Daddy’s girl when yer older, yeah?”

You laughed heartily, rolling your eyes. “Already is.” You couldn’t help but watch them both with a love drunk smile on your lips. If this was the happiest moment of your life, it would be the best one ever.

“Let me get a picture of you two.” You prompted, not waiting for Harry to agree; he always did. You leant forward on your knees, pulling your phone out of your side pocket. “Can Mommy have this? Just for one second?” You coax the dummy from between her lips, able to snap a few pictures of your loves together before her chin quivers and soft cries dramatic escape her, Harry’s smile doubling as he laughs.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Here, you can have your dummy back, sweet girl.” You giggled, leaning forward to settle the nipple back between her lips. She settles in seconds, cuddling back into Harry’s arms like nothing happened.

“Definitely Daddy’s girl.” You smirked, giggling. Harry rolled his eyes fondly, shoved at your leg with his foot, effectively knocking you over this time. The both of you laughed loudly, more in love then ever.

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harrystyles: May 20th

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ynstyles: no babies were hurt in the capturing of this picture

annetwist: oh my girl ❤️

hizzolovebot: it’s not harry’s house anymore. it’s baby s’s house.

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ynstyles: ellie’s house

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harrystylesalberta: ellie 🥺

harrystyles: ❤️

the.daisytomlinson: so cute x

fruitgasmrry: HER NAME IS ELLE

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ynstyles: Eloise Gemma 🤍

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gemmastyles: fav girl

annetwist: miss you both

kyliejenner: angel 👼🏼

taylorswift: 🤍

—

HARRY STYLES TAGLIST

A — E

@amyvandijk-blog @bvttercupbby @beautifulwisdom2001 @dmonchld @dopeydreamer @eydie57 @erodaangel

F — J

@fl0werp0tt @goldenxstyles7

K — O

@lillucyandthejets @myfavfanficsever @madison2035 @marajillana @bigfeelings-smallwords

P — T

@raine @stiles-o-dylan24 @spookybooisa @stillmanicc @sararora11 @sambucky8 @sweetydylan @theot5inourstars @theamazingtomholland

U — Z

@waddlenut

[elliesirlgf]

Mutual Feeling. (Part 4.)

Warning: Language,Oral,fingering,Smut,Somewhat Angst?

Authors Note: it’s back!!! My sincere apologies for taking eternity to finish this. I’m sorry if it’s lazy and a let down as well. I gave up on it for a little bit,but I planned out some of the plot for the upcoming chapters!! May your survival be long.🌿

Ellie grabbed onto your waist as you bit her bottom lip. She started lightly pulling up your shirt,But you quickly pushed her away from you as you shook your head. “No,Ellie. No! I’m not gonna do this with you. I’m- I’m done.”

Ellie looked at you as her eyes shined in the moonlight,but for the first time,you couldn’t read her. You couldn’t understand her expression or what she was feeling in that moment. You stared at her with a hurt expression on your face as your breathing got faster and your pent up anger was getting the best of you. Your shaky hand turned into a fist as you bit your lip,trying to refrain from causing further problems.

“I saw you with Cat…You kissed her. Ellie,I’m not gonna do this. You have a girlfriend,We don’t like each other I…I hate you!”

You looked at Ellie,Your eyes scanning everywhere on her face. Ellie looked at you with a hurt expression once you said “I hate you!”

Ellie just stood there for a second,Blinking tons of times as if she was going to cry. Her lip slightly twitched before she said to you. “…She kissed me. You misunderstood what you saw.”

You looked at Ellie,Shaking your head as you scoffed. “Bullshit,Williams. Get the fuck out.”

Ellie looked at you,blinking even more as her eyebrows furrowed.

“You are nothing,Ellie. Absolutely. fucking. nothing. You hurt everyone around you,You ruin everyone’s lives,and mess with their feelings like it’s all some game. I’m not gonna put up with that bullshit. I have done absolutely nothing to you to deserve the way you treat me. I tried being there for you as best as I could. But it’s never enough,is it? I hate you,Williams.”

Ellie’s eyes widened after hearing what you said,you felt bad As well for what you said,but it was true. Ellie needed to stop living in a fantasy world and wake the fuck up. Ellie shook her head before a sheepish grin took place on her face. She reached into her back pocket,pulling out a pocket knife and walking towards you. Soon,you were cornered against the wall,you looked at Ellie,confused as to what her intentions were.

“Guess it’s a Mutual Feeling then,huh?” Ellie said as she put her knee in between your thighs. You rolled your eyes before she grabbed your face. “Don’t roll your goddamn eyes at me.” Her breath was hot and her hands were cold. Her tattoo’d hand threw the knife across the floor. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t soaked between your panties,you were convinced her clothed knee was already soaked.

“E-El-“ you were quickly cut off by an aggressive kiss. Ellie smacked her hand on the wall behind you,continuing to leave her knee in between your thighs. “Shut the fuck up.” Ellie said as she let out a sigh. As you took a moment to catch your breath,You looked at her,and after a few seconds your mind went blank and all you could mutter out was “Fuck It.” You kissed Ellie even more aggressively,cupping her face as you walked towards the bed. Ellie fell on the bed,as you did too,Sitting on top of her as your lips never parted. You grinded on her,letting out a long sigh. Ellie took your shirt off when the kiss broke,and she bit her lip.

El threw your shirt somewhere in the room as you removed her’s as well. She smirked,watching you become needy for her. You let out whimpers as you reached her jeans,Struggling to get them off. Ellie just grinned at you,Chuckling. You stared at her with a death glare as you managed to unbutton her jeans. Before you could get them off,Ellie gripped a handful of your hair and brung you close to her face. “My turn.” She chuckled before flipping you onto your back,sucking behind your ear. You let out a moan as she made her way down your body,leaving trails of hickeys. You knew you’d regret this,but it didn’t stop you. You couldn’t deny you had feelings for Ellie,And the only thing you wanted to do was feel her body. Touch her. Make love to her.

Ellie took your shorts off,Tracing her cold hands up and down your exposed thigh. You were growing impatient,You needed Ellie. And the fact that she was taking her time,pissed you off. Before your brain could comprehend anything else,You felt your panties Being pushed to the side,and two fingers making contact into your entrance. You quickly moved your hand up to you mouth,Trying not to let out the moan you were convinced would wake up everyone in Jackson. Ellie’s elbow being the only support she had as she fingering you with her tattoo’d hand,she used her other hand to snatch your hand away from your mouth. “Let out those moans for me,pretty girl.” You obliged as you felt your walls clench from Ellie’s fingers. She picked up the pace,her long and slender fingers pumping in and out of you. The bonus was that her fingers were cold,bringing you even more pleasure than you’d care to admit. Ellie’s hands eventually started slowing down,as you gave her a death glare in return. Ellie smirked at you as she saw how mad and upset you looked,That was until her lips made contact with your pussy. She ate you out like it was her last meal on earth. You ruffled her hair as the pleasure was becoming so overwhelming. You tried to close your legs in between her head,but she spread them open,leaving them even wider than last time. Ellie knew how to please you. She knew all your sensitive spots,the spots that gave you the most pleasure,the spots that made you reach your climax. Ellie put her tongue to even more use when she slid it inside your hole. This caused you to whimper and moan,louder than you have all night. “F-fuck,Ellie!” She smirked for a quick second,her tongue still inside you. Her nose made contact with your clit a few times when she shook her head to savor your taste. Your nails dug into your sheets,as you felt yourself becoming close. Your moans were loud,But you didn’t care about being quiet anymore,you couldn’t hold it back. The knot in your stomach was tight,Like a rope that had a heavy weight attached to it;About to snap. You grabbed a handful of Ellie’s messy auburn hair,gripping it tightly,causing Ellie to let out a low and raspy groan. Her tongue was replaced by a finger when she heard your moans get shakier and louder. Your legs were even shaking at this point. You were so close. Ellie looked a mess,She was sweating,the strands of hair stuck to her face. That didn’t stop her from eating the soul out of you. She sucked on your clit,Her finger still pumping in and out of you. You gripped the sheets harder,the knot in your stomach finally snapping. You let out a shaky moan,Practically crying from the overwhelming pleasure. Your legs were shaking,and you were sure you weren’t going to be able to walk or stand for a while. Ellie sucked on your clit for a few seconds after you came,and then she soon licked your pussy clean. You let out low and soft whimpers as tears rolled down your cheeks. You saw stars. Ellie didn’t say anything to you,she just wiped her nose and mouth as she stood up,grabbing her shirt that was thrown earlier,and after she put it on,she sat at the edge of the bed. You looked at her,your chest rising and falling down rapidly as you tried to catch your breath. “H…Hey…” you said in a low tone,Staring at her as she sat there with her back faced to you.

…Silence. You sat in Silence.

[poisonmaximoff]

BELATED FATE (Elizabeth Olsen x FemReader).

The whole story: here.

Chapter 25. You and I

Y/n's POV:

"Do you believe in the theory of three loves?" I ask, leaning back against Elizabeth's chest as we lie relaxed in the tub after an amazing evening spent together in our bed.

"Nope, what's that?" She asks and presses her soft lips against my neck, gently planting a few light kisses there, making me tilt my head a little so she has more access.

"Like the person can fall in love only three times in their life. It actually perfectly fits me," I begin to explain as her right hand finds it's place on my bent knee, stroking it, and her left one comes down to my waist, pulling me even closer to her.

"First one is the love that just looks right. That's what we all imagine it to be, easy and perfect, like in fairytales, it appeals to what we should be doing for society's sake. In my case it's my first boyfriend, that I had in high school," I continue talking while she lifts her lips from my neck, transferring small kisses to my cheek and temple.

"The second love is the hard one, that teaches us lessons about who we actually are and what we need. It hurts, brings pain, lies or even abuse sometimes, making us suffer because of our own choices. It can be unhealthy, unbalanced and toxic, exactly what I had with Taylor, love that we wished was right." At these words, Elizabeth stops her actions, but after a few seconds, she takes my chin with three fingers and makes me turn my head towards her so that she can kiss my lips.

"Are you even listening to me?" I ask, reluctantly pulling away from her and meeting an amused sparkling gaze.

"Mhm." That's all she says before one more time covering my lips with hers, placing her hand on my jaw, but I again break the kiss, staring at her with the pout on my face.

"I'm listening, I promise, just can't get enough of you," she speaks under her breath, flicking her gaze between my features, but I narrow my eyes in disbelief, suspecting that she didn't really hear a word.

"What was the last thing I said?" I ask and she only rolls her eyes playfully, pecking my lips couple of times. "Answer me-e-e," I whine, but then do the same thing as she just did, not being able to resist her charm.

"You said about your second love, I'm really listening," she answers, surprising me with giving an actual attention to whatever I was talking about. "What about the third one, hmm?"

"It's the love that lasts. We never see it coming, it just suddenly hits us and at first looks extremely wrong, but then we understand that it's the only one that can be right, because it feels like that. We can't explain it, we just surrender to it without thinking, fully accepting the other person for who they are. And I truly think, that you're this very person for me." I finish my short explanation and watch her looking thoughtfully somewhere through me before gently resting her head on my bare shoulder.

"I really hope so, Y/n/n. To be honest, I think I fell for you the moment I saw you the first time. But then Taylor and...well..." she states hugging my body tightly, inhaling the sweet scent of my shampoo, visibly becoming a little bit nervous.

"You know, Ellie," I place my hands on the top of hers, trying to prevent her from being stressed because of it, "I think we both had to get through this experience, even if it wasn't good. I'm not the person that you saw then, so maybe it was better for us to discover each other exactly now to stop us from making irreversible mistakes then. You know what I mean?" I ask and turn my head so I could see her still thoughtful face expression.

"I hate it when you act more mature than me," she smiles defeatedly and leans in to press her lips to mine once again only to see me eagerly respond to her sweet action.

"See, I wasn't like that back then. So everything's happening as it should be," I reassure her one more time and soon we're back in a big comfortable bed, falling asleep in each other's arms after an eventful and surprisingly the best day of my life, which was originally expected to be the worst.

"Y/n, baby, wake up." El's morning voice fills my ears as she tries to wake me up with small gentle pushes, but my brain refuses to take in everything that's going on, aware only of her presence next to me.

"Sunshine, come on," she softly shakes my shoulder until I'm only starting to come to my senses and understand that yesterday was not a dream, but my new reality, in which I woke up today. Opening my eyes with difficulty, I immediately squint them because of the morning light and after half-consciously rubbing them, my gaze meets two emeralds attentively studying my face, causing a dreamy smile appear on my lips.

"Finally you woke you up, does it always take you so long?" She asks, brushing a few strands of hair out of my face while I continue to stare at my lover's beautiful face.

"No, this night just was the most peaceful one I've had in a while, I slept so goo-o-od." I'm stretching my arms and the smile doesn't slip from my face, thereby making the woman next to me smile too, bend down and lovingly peck my lips. "Why did you wake me up so early?" I ask, grabbing her hand that was caressing my cheek and placing a couple of small kisses on it.

"First of all it's 10 a.m. already, and your phone was ringing, you didn't hear it at all?" She arches an eyebrow as she straightens her back and sits next to me, running two fingers along my belly and chest.

"Nope, did you look who it was?" First I prop myself up on my elbows and then crawl to take a place on her thighs, wrapping my arms around her neck and leaning my forehead on hers, indicating that I want to spend this day only in closeness with her, not thinking about anything else.

"No, why would I look through your phone, hmm?" As soon as she reaches her lips to mine, it rings once again, causing both of us to exhale in disappointment.

"Yes, mom?" I answer and immediately hear my mother's serious tone and someone speaking in the background.

"Y/n, why haven't you called me yet? You promised to let me know as soon as you get to New York and settle down in a new apartment, we agreed to that!" A hint of worry is heard in her voice and I mentally give myself a slap in the face for completely forgetting to call her, looking frightened at Elizabeth, who is carefully studying me with her eyes.

"Mom, I don't know how to tell you that, but I changed my mind and actually am home now, sorry for not telling you this yesterday." I speak in as guilty a tone as possible so that she takes pity on me and doesn't become mad. After spending about 20 seconds in complete silence, I decide that I was having some communication problems before her voice fills my ears again.

"Y/n Y/sn Y/ln, what on earth is going on? I'm going to visit you right now and have a serious conversation with you," she says in a stern tone and I hear my father tell her to calm down, but she still insists on her decision, telling him that he spoiled me and I understand that now I'm in trouble.

"Mom..." I start, but she doesn't let me speak and tells me that she'll be here in half an hour before hanging up, making my eyes widen and my heart beat much faster than usual, notably frightening me with her seriousness, which I haven't seen already for years.

"What happened?" Elizabeth moves towards me, placing her hand on my knee and smiling slightly over my scared expression before I slowly turn my head towards her, biting my lower lip nervously.

"My mom will be here soon and she seems mad, this won't end well, what will we tell her? Will you have to hide in some room again? How do I explain everything to her?" The stream of all the questions that are spinning in my mind starts to leave my mouth as my head gradually turns off, plunging me into a stressful state.

"Baby, shh, look at me." El takes my cheeks in both hands, squeezing them lightly and making me freeze in place, staring straight into her eyes. "You don't want your mom to see me here?" She asks slightly disappointed, watching my reaction carefully.

"What? No, it's not that, of course, I mean... Do you want her to know everything? My dad already seems to know about us, but I'm sure he didn't tell her anything."

"Oh, so that's why he told me what airport you were at, I was honestly really surprised", she lets out a small relieved breath, smiling at me and continues: "I wonder how does he know everything then?" She smirks, biting her lip as she moves even closer to me, practically sitting on my lap.

"He figured it out himself, and that was as much of a surprise to me as it is to you. So you're okay with them knowing about our relationship or I misunderstood?" I decide to clarify, as apparently experience from the past doesn't allow me to fully accept the fact that I can ever have a normal, healthy and open relationship, so I still feel weird about this. Everything happens so fast that I even feel a little overwhelmed, but when Elizabeth is with me, I'm not afraid to let any changes into my life.

"I'm okay with it, I mean eventually everyone will know about it, since I'm not going to spend my whole life in closet. But I need some time to figure everything out, if you don't mind waiting a bit..." She purses her bottom lip and looks down at the crumpled sheets as she begins to play with the hem of her oversized T-shirt.

"I'm so proud of you." I say before I have a chance to think about it, but the words seem to speak themselves without my knowledge, causing El to look up at me in surprise.

"It was random, I know, but I'm really proud of you for deciding to change your life so drastically without knowing what awaits you. Until recently, I didn't believe that there would ever be a person who was ready for such an act for me, and I cannot be more grateful for the fact that you appeared in my life. Only two month made me love you more than I could ever imagine." I end my heartfelt mini-confession, staring at her for an answer and watching her eyes slightly fill with tears, almost causing my hand to reach for her face.

"And yes, take as long as you need, I'll wait until you're completely ready," I add and she hugs me tightly, burying her nose in my neck, taking me by surprise.

"You have no idea how amazing you are, do you?" She gives me a happy smile and I feel like this is what I would like to see before my eyes for the rest of my life.

"For doing a bare minimum? Miss Olsen, your bar is on the floor." My defensive reaction at the unexpected compliment sends me into the land of stupid jokes, but El immediately understands this as if she knows me like her own ten fingers.

"It still means a world to me," she ignores the tease, pecking the tip of my nose before offering me to have some breakfast.

"Oh god, it's her," I say, stopping eating my fruit salad as soon as I hear the doorbell ring, which for some reason sends chills down my spine.

"Everything will be fine, I'm sure she will understand and accept everything." El tries to calm me down, reminding that she is always there for me and as usual she succeeds. I nod to her and, planting a small kiss on the back of her hand that was holding mine for the last 10 minutes, I hasten to open the door.

"Hi mom, hi dad?" My tone suddenly changes to a questioning one as I stare in surprise at my father behind my disgruntled mother's back.

"I tried to stop her," he shrugs, which earns my mom a sharp look, first at him and then at me.

"Can anyone explain to me what's going on here?" She asks, crossing the threshold of my apartment. "First Derek yells something about your airport to the running in the middle of the wedding ceremony Elizabeth, then you suddenly decide to cancel the trip, you two are definitely fooling me," she immediately starts the conversation, but after a few seconds, she seems to freeze in place, stopping her eyes on my girlfriend sitting at the kitchen table.

"Hi, Mrs. Y/ln." El smiles awkwardly and waves at her, eyes flickering between the three of us as my mom stares at her, puzzled, and my dad and I shift from foot to foot, not sure where to start.

"For how long?" That's all she asks, and we understand that she, being a smart and educated woman, immediately guessed everything a second later after seeing Elizabeth here.

"For...a day?" I answer her, deciding to omit the fact that our first kiss was a month ago so she wouldn't have a heart attack. She shifts her gaze from my girlfriend to me, narrowing her eyes suspiciously as if she doesn't believe what I just said.

"Mom, you got it all wrong, we weren't in a relationship while El was with Boyd, I promise." I'm trying to fix how wrong the situation looks on her part, and she slowly walks over to the table to take a seat across from Elizabeth.

"Now tell me everything from the beginning and don't miss any details," she says calmly and crosses her legs in anticipation of our story, interlocking her fingers.

[navalcriminalimagines]

Better than me

This is my very first Joel Miller x Reader work. And I completely got carried away. I may do a series, if you guys like it? Joel deserves all the love in the world 🥺Please, let me know what you think!

Summary: You live across the street from Joel. Every night, you watch him play the guitar on his porch and one night, you find the courage to go out and talk to him.

Songs: Future days ; Better than me

Warnings: Smut, oral, p in v, creampie, unprotected sex, a bit of roughness

Words count: 5k

Jackson, Wyoming

Just like every night, your neighbor Joel Miller was sitting on his porch, playing his guitar. Just like every night, you stood by your window, listening to whatever he’s playing, tonight he settled on ‘Future days’. You remembered this song from a long time ago. And just like every night, you hoped you’d find the courage to go out and talk to him.

But you never really talked to him. You crossed paths every now and then, barely exchanging two sentences. It’s way much easier to talk with Ellie, the teenager living with him. One day, you were actually talking with Ellie inside the house and when he got home, you found a stupid excuse and disappeared pretty quickly.

You haven’t been able to find the courage to talk to him. Until that night. It was 2am, and you could still hear him play. He was trying to be silent, even though that’s not really possible. You quickly checked yourself in the shitty small mirror of your bathroom and got out of your house. Joel noticed you only when you were standing right in front of him.

“Hey, Y/N. I’m sorry, did I wake you up?” he gently asked.

“Nah, don’t worry. Couldn’t sleep,” you waved off. “Thought I’d enjoy the music from closer,” you were thankfully it was dark outside, so he couldn’t see you profusely blushing.

“Take a seat,” he offered, showing off the chair next to him. “I’m not sure we’ve ever been properly introduced?” he said, after you settled next to him.

“Yeah, me neither,” you smiled. “Y/N Y/L/N, I’m from Nevada, I’ve been in Jackson for a few months and well-- what else can we say?”

He chuckled. “Fair. Joel Miller,” he said, extending his hand to you over his guitar and you shook it. “I’m from Texas. And I play the guitar,”

“Noticed. You actually have been my personal radio for the past months,”

“As long as you enjoy it. Do you play?”

“Unfortunately not. I used to play violin though,” you confessed. “Long time ago,”

“I wish I could find one, just to hear you play,”

That night, most of the conversation turned around music and instruments. You were a teenager when the virus appeared, and you were a music junkie. You didn’t know why but you confessed to Joel that your dream was to be a rockstar and tour all around the world with a band. He told you about his favorite artists back then, and how he started to play the guitar. He confessed about writing songs when the inspiration hits. Which hasn’t for a while.

The next day, you happily joined him again. This time, you talked less about music and more about yourselves. Joel told you about Ellie, how he met her and how that teenager made her way to his heart. For a moment, he considered telling you about Sarah, but what would be the point? You don’t know each other enough, and he didn’t want to look like the man stuck twenty years prior. Even if you all are, somehow. You told him about your family, that you lost a while ago and how you ended up here in Jackson.

For weeks, meeting Joel on his porch became a thing. You were there almost every night, even when there were some sorts of events in town. You enjoyed his company way more than you should and so did he. But neither of you would say so. Some nights, he didn’t even pick up his guitar, it was just you and him, right there, talking. Falling.

One night, Joel’s heart rushed into his chest as he saw you walking with a limp, up to your house. He put his guitar down and jogged to you, right before you slammed your front door. “Y/N, are you okay?” he asked, clearly worried.

“Huh, yeah, yeah. My knee didn’t appreciate today’s patrol,” you told him, motioning him to join inside your house.

“Were you attacked or something?” he asked, watching you collapsing on your couch.

“No, no, nothing like that. I’m just a klutz,” you tiredly giggled. Joel wanted to laugh too but he was still very worried. He grabbed a pillow and gently lifted your leg to put it under.

“I’ll be right back in ten minutes, okay?”

You didn’t have time to overthink. Joel left your house in a rush and true to his words, he came back ten minutes later with something in his hand. You hadn’t moved a bit, and you watched him approaching. What he had in his hands was ice. “Do you mind if I bounce back your pants?” he asked and you nodded.

Ever so gently, Joel freed your injured knee and put the ice on it. You hissed at the cold and thanked him anyway. “I’m gonna let you rest,”

You didn’t want him to leave. Not just yet. “You know, the pain will probably keep me awake for a while. I wouldn’t mind a private concert by my favorite guitarist,”

Joel chuckled at that, trying to avoid how it made his heart melt. “Fine. I’ll be right back,”

That night, Joel played ‘Future days’ over and over after you asked him to. He kept playing and singing until you fell asleep next to him.

It took a few weeks for your knee to heal, during which Joel had been nothing but an angel. He was over your house every day, checking on your knee to make sure it was properly healing. He made sure you have enough ice and he brought your meals to prevent you from going to the self. Even while being on a patrol, he found a way to have your meals being brought to you.

“Must be nice to be Joel Miller’s favorite,” Jesse joked as you opened the door. He was holding your dinner in one hand and some ice in the other. “God I wish someone would home delivered for me,”

You let your friend in, and settled back on your couch with your leg up. “I can injure your knee for you,” you offered with a grin.

“Wouldn’t work. I’m not cute enough to get Joel’s attention,”

“Shut up!”

Jesse sat next to you. “His guitar’s here. Is he living here? Oh my god, are you guys dating?”

“No! We’re just friends,” you explained. “We just share the same love of music. So, yes, he does come here and plays,”

“Wow, you really think I’m gonna buy this?” Jesse raised an eyebrow at you.

“Jesse, I swear. Nothing is happening between me and Joel,”

“But you wished,”

“Just leave already.” you retorted.

“Y/N, be careful, okay? The man is broken,”

“Yeah, so?”

“I just don’t want you to get hurt,”

“Right. Cause you surely stopped loving Dina when you found that she was a lesbian!”

“I’m just saying, Y/N.”

“Thanks for the home delivery,” you don’t want a cold to stand between you and Jesse, “If I had money, I’d tip you,” you smiled at him.

“You know, you could pay me in nature,”

While that sentence made you laugh, Joel didn’t have the same reaction. He was standing right behind Jesse, his arms crossed over his chest. Your friend didn’t see him at first, still waiting for you to say something, “Hi, Joel,” you said, embarrassed.

Jesse didn’t turn around immediately. He knew Joel would kill him if he could. “I’m just gonna go and avoid your eyes, Joel,” he said, leaving the house in a rush, his face buried deep in his shoulders.

“Good call,” Joel muttered.

“It was just a joke,” you said as soon as you heard the door closing.

“I wouldn’t be sure about that, Y/N. He was just waiting for you to say yes,” Joel was still standing with his arms crossed.

“So, what if I agreed?” you teased him, hoping it would make things move forward a little. But it didn’t.

“Do you want me to call him back? He isn’t far, yet,”

“Just come here and give me my hug, would you?”

Joel’s anger - and obvious jealousy - evaporated as soon as you wrapped your arms around his neck. He isn’t much of a hugger, but you are and you managed to make him addicted to your hugs. He loves being intoxicated by your scent, he loves how you hold him tight, he loves how your fingers always find their way to the small hair in the back of his head. And you love how he buries his head in your back, how his strong arms wrap you so perfectly, how his hands sometimes grab your clothes in a fist.

A few weeks later

Your knee was completely healed and you were back on patrols. Things were moving in Jackson and you and Joel spent less late nights together. You were missing him and he was missing you.

One night, a ball was being held. Everyone here needed that every now and then to cheer up and have some good time. Jesse, Dina and Ellie convinced you to come. You did and as predicted, you spent the entire night waiting for Joel to appear, but he never did.

You were walking back to your house around 3 in the morning. As you approached your street, you could hear the music. Instead of going home, you stopped in front of Joel’s porch. “You said you’d come,” you told him.

“I know, I shouldn’t have. Those aren’t my thing,” he apologized. “Are you mad?”

“No,” you said, lying just a little and sitting next to him. “Just disappointed. It was really nice,”

“No doubt. I’m sorry,”

“I’ll accept your apology with you show me how to play,”

Joel chuckled and handed you his guitar. Then, he moved his chair closer to yours. His chest was literally against your back, his face a few inches from yours. You tried to focus on the instrument, but he made it really hard as his hand covered yours in order to show you where to put your fingers. He started with the easiest chord, E.

As you played violin, it wasn’t completely new to you. But you’d have played dumb if needed, as long as he stayed right where he was. When E sounded good, Joel turned his face to the side to look at you. You were already staring. His lips were so close to yours, you could feel his hot breath on your skin. His eyes went from your eyes to your lips, from your lips to your eyes.

It was now or never. You took your shot and crashed your lips on his. Thankfully, he eagerly responded to your kiss. One of his hands moved to your neck, his beard was gently tickling your skin and he parted his lips, letting his tongue out. You happily welcomed his tongue into your mouth and moaned. The kiss was passionate and intense, Joel couldn’t get you close enough to his liking.

But eventually, he broke it off. You whined, and when you opened your eyes again, you couldn’t see it caused him physical pain to break the kiss. “Don’t you want—“ you start to say.

“I do,” he cut you off. “God, how I do,” his nose was brushing against yours, his hand still in your neck.

“Then why aren’t lips on mine anymore?” You gently nipped his bottom lip and that made him chuckle.

“Are you sure, Y/N?” He had to ask.

“Fuck, Joel. I’ve been simping over you for ages,”

“Simping?”

“Right, sorry I forgot how old you are,” you rolled your eyes.

“I’m gonna show you how old I am, babygirl,” he groaned.

In a flash, Joel grabbed his guitar and your wrist. You’re actually not sure which one he was holding the softest. He put the guitar in the living room and took you to his bedroom. As soon as he kicked the door shut, he spinned you around, holding you against the door and his lips crashed on yours, roughly.

He didn’t kiss you long enough, though. He quickly drifted south, and assaulted your neck. You moaned in his hair, and you could feel the obvious bulge in his jeans against your thighs. His hands traveled under your top and you tried to palm his erection, but he immediately stopped you.

Joel grabbed your wrists into his hand and pinned them above your head. He just stared for a moment. Stared at your swollen lips, at the marks he already made in your neck and in your eyes. You were looking at him with both killing desire and love. It confused him for a brief second but he shut his brain and kissed you again.

You were desperate to touch him, undress him, feel him. But he was strongly holding your hands, all you could was grinding your center against his thigh. “So needy,” he whispered in your ear before nipping the lobe. You swallowed thickly and let out a loud moan.

“Yes, I need you Joel. Please,” you begged him. When was the last time someone beg for him?

“It’s been such a long time, I probably won’t last,” he breathed out, shamefully.

“We have a lifetime ahead of us, who cares,”

That sentence didn’t have the impact you were shooting for. In a second, you were completely free from Joel’s grip as he took a big step back. He was panting. “That’s not—“ he whispered, trying to put his thoughts into words.

“Aw baby, did you already come?” you teased him.

“That was a close call, but that’s not my point, Y/N,” you could see he was getting angry. But why? At who?

You took a step forward, your hands tenderly cupping his bearded cheeks. “Then what is your point?” you asked, genuinely concerned.

“This—is a bad idea,” Joel struggled. He leaned into your touch but frowned as he knew he couldn’t enjoy it too much. “You—you should leave,” he wrapped his hands around your wrists, forcing you to let go of his face.

“Not until you give me one good reason, Joel.” Now, you were getting angry. Hurt. Frustrated. All of that.

“You deserve better—“ he whispered. “Better than me,”

“That’s not a good—“

“That’s good enough for me. Please, Y/N.” He begged you, pain clearly written all over his face.

“You’re making a big mistake, you know that?” Joel heard your voice cracking and you had barely finished your sentence, that his thumb was softly brushing your lips.

“That’s my jam,” he sadly tried to joke.

You have no idea what happened in his mind in a brief period of time but for whatever reason, Joel wanted you to leave. He had changed his mind and you’re not the kind of person to force people. If he doesn’t want you like this, if he doesn’t want you around him, you’ll let him be.

You left his house. Leaving you both broken-hearted.

A year later

Avoiding someone in Jackson isn’t an easy task, but somehow, Joel managed to do it pretty well. He always disappeared when you showed up, no matter where it was. He managed to never stare at you from afar when you were definitely staring. The only moment you could’ve walked to him and asked for explanations was at night, as he kept playing the guitar and all of those songs you kept talking about. But he asked you to leave and never apologized. Why would you be the one to make the first move?

As Joel checked his next patrol, he noticed he’s set on a patrol with you the very next day. Completely pissed off, he bursted into Tommy’s office and slammed the door behind. He planted his fists on the desk and stared at his younger brother. “Why the hell am I teaming with Y/N for tomorrow’s patrol?” he barked.

“What’s wrong with her?” Tommy asked, genuinely curious as to why Joel was that mad.

“Nothing,” he said, raising his hands defensively. “I just don’t want to team up with her,”

“I’ll consider making some changes, if you give me a good reason,” Tommy stood up and got closer to Joel.

“I--I almost had sex with her,”

“Almost? Couldn’t get through with it, brother?” Tommy teased him.

Before answering, Joel threw himself on the worn out couch and Tommy sat on the armbar, waiting for explanations. “We were--at it. But I had to stop,” Joel admitted, growling at himself.

“Couldn’t get it up?”

“Tommy, fuck off,”

“I honestly don’t understand how in the world you couldn’t have sex with one of the most beautiful women in Jackson,”

“Cause-- she deserves better than this. Better than me,”

“Bullshit!” Tommy shouted.

“Listen, I’m an old grumpy and lonely guy--” Joel trailed off.

“Cut the crap, bro. I’ve always wondered what her deal was, since she’s turning down all the guys around, but now it makes sense. She clearly wants you,”

“She shouldn’t,”

“Don’t you think that’s on her to decide? So, please, get the hell out of my office, go on that patrol with her tomorrow and take things back where you left them,”

“You’re the worst brother ever,” Joel rolled his eyes.

“I know. I want my brother to get laid, how horrible of me,” Tommy sarcastically answered, before giving his brother a tap in his back.

The next day came way too fast for Joel.

He was late and people were pressing you to do the patrol. You took the two horses with you and walked up to his house. You knocked and let yourself in immediately, “Joel, you’re late,” you called out for him, “I know you don’t want to spend the day with me but we don’t have a choice,” you spoke loudly, not knowing where he was. As you walked to the kitchen, you saw Ellie packing her bag. “Oh, hey El!” you greeted her, hoping you weren’t blushing.

She smiled at you. “Joel’s in the bathroom. He should be down in a minute,” she told you before walking out. “He brought some coffee. Help yourself,”

“Oh, nice!”

Upstairs, Joel couldn’t decide what to wear. Why did it matter anyway? Why did he want to look...good for you? He didn’t have much clothes and all of them were used and dirty. But he settled for his green shirt, as he remembered you telling him it looked good on him. He checked his hair and beard one more time, he even checked his breath before cursing to himself. And he joined you downstairs.

You poured yourself a cup of coffee in Joel’s used mug and started to look around, waiting for him. You hadn’t been there in a year, you hadn’t even approached the porch. You missed this, you missed Joel.

A paper on the coffee table grabbed your attention. You took it in your hand and started to read what was on it, but you heard Joel’s footsteps coming down. You only had a glimpse of it

“The bed I'm lying in is getting colder

Wish I never would've said it's over

And I can't pretend

I won't think about you when I'm older

'Cause we never really had our closure

This can't be the end

I really miss your hair in my face

And the way your innocence tastes

And I think you should know this

You deserve much better than me”

You recognized Joel’s handwriting. This really sounded like a song, but no time to analyze it, as he took the paper from your hand and folded it in his back pocket. “Is that a song?” You asked.

“Really don’t want to talk about it. Let’s go,”

“Haven’t finished my coff—“ you didn’t have time to finish either your sentence or your coffee. Joel grabbed the mug from your hand and drank the rest of the brown liquor.

“There. Finished.”

“Wow, it’s gonna be a long day,” you mumbled in your teeth as you were walking out.

“What?” Joel asked from behind.

“It’s gonna be a wonderful day!” You sarcastically exclaimed.

It was indeed a long day. You and Joel barely talked, only exchanging about your ride of the day. You tried your best not to look much at him, but it was hard as he was looking this good with his green shirt. The worst was when he rolled up his sleeves, showing off his strong and veiny forearms.

On the other hand, Joel spent the entire day looking at you. Most of the time, you were riding the horse in front of him. He had a perfect view on your ass and he loved how it bounced. You were wearing an old tank top, letting him see your tattoo on your shoulder. He wanted to press his lips against your skin again. He missed you like hell.

“Are you mad at me, Y/N?” he asked, while the two of you had gone down from the horses. You turned around to face him.

“Mad?” you sounded angry but somehow, your body language and the sadness on your face said otherwise. “No, I’m just--lost. I still don’t understand, Joel.” you shrugged. There was something in your expression, on your face, that broke his heart all over again.

“I told you.” he just answered.

“Well okay, let’s say that it doesn’t make sense to me,” you corrected yourself, “We spent so much time together, and every second was amazing. Then we kissed and--you took me inside your house, you pinned me against your door, I thought it was going really well and all of the sudden, you backed off. And--and you spent the past year avoiding me, but somehow, you still play your fucking guitar on your porch, knowing that I can hear you. Hell, you spend a serious amount of time playing ‘Future days’— and what you wrote—”

You hadn’t realized you were rambling until his lips crashed into yours. Rough but tender at the same time, his beard tickled your nose. He was holding your face in his hands, making you as close as possible to him. It stayed a chaste kiss until he pulled back. “And now you’re kissing me again,” you said, a bit shaken in a beautiful way.

“I just wanted you to shut up,” he smirked.

“Please, make some sense, Joel,” you pleaded him. “Because I really don’t understand and it prevents me from moving on,” you paused, “Not that I actually want to move on,”

“You never shut up, do you?”

“Then maybe you shouldn’t stop kissing me,”

Back at your house

This past year was long forgotten when you and Joel reached your house. You locked your door behind and basically ran to your bedroom, taking him with you. You were so fast, Joel almost tripped in the stairs. Once in your bedroom, you threw him on your bed and straddled him. You were not going to let him escape this time.

You crashed your lips on his, and you kissed him feverishly. You never unbuttoned a shirt this fast in your life. Joel’s hands got under your tank top and quickly got rid of it, along with your bra. Joel cupped one of your breasts in his hand and brought his mouth to the other. He played with your nipples for a moment, while you freed him from his jeans and boxers. You stroked him a few times, feeling some precum on your fingers. Joel let out the biggest moan he ever had. It’s been so long. So fucking long, he couldn’t stand the foreplay, “I need to be inside you, sweetheart. Like, right now,” he growled.

You got off his lap just to take your pants and panties off. Joel’s eyes darken at the sight of your naked body. He could’ve come just from the sight.

You pushed his shoulders so he was completely laying on the bed. Joel felt your wetness when you started to grind your center against his hard cock. It was killing him.

“Just for my peace of mind,” he managed to say, “You’re not a virgin, are you?” he asked, his hands resting on your hips.

“Would it change something if I was?” you answered, pressing your body against his.

“Yes. I wouldn’t want to hurt you. I would take my time with you,” he gently said, planting soft kisses around your mouth.

“I’m not a virgin. It’s been a while though, does hymen grow back?”

Joel laughed at that, but his laugh quickly turned into a deep growl as you made him penetrate you. You slided onto him so slowly, it took everything in his power not to shove his length as deep as he could. You felt his fingers digging so hard on your hips, you’ll probably wake up with bruises in the morning. It’s been such a long time, it almost felt like it was indeed your first time.

As he bottomed out, Joel kissed you roughly. He’s not going to last. This is too much. “Fuck, Y/N! You’re so tight,” he groaned in your ear, holding your hair in his fist.

You pulled out slowly and got him to bottom out again. You rode him with this killer pace, until he couldn’t take it anymore. He made you roll over and pinned you down onto the mattress. Again, his fingers dug into your skin, and his lips crashed on yours in a rough and sloppy kiss. Joel quickened the pace, fucking you relentlessly. He could hear you cry his name and it quickly became a blur to him. It was so much for him, he completely forgot about your pleasure and after a few quick and hard thrusts, Joel came deep inside your pussy, crying your name out loud.

This was too quick, you didn’t have time to cum too. But you didn’t mind, you knew he was going to get even. Plus, seeing him falling apart on top of you like that was the most sexy and erotic and amazing thing you ever witnessed. That image only could get you soaking wet. Pretty much like you were at this moment.

“Fuck, sweetheart, I’m so sorry,” he said, collapsing on you.

“It’s okay,” you reassured him, stroking his hair and kissing his temple. He was sweaty as hell, but you loved the taste of him on your lips.

“God,” he panicked, “I came inside you,” he looked at you with wide eyes, realizing the risk it was. He should have never come inside you. This is way too risky. There are no birth controls and no condoms. He can’t do that again. The panic washed him over, but you stayed pretty calmed under him. “Why are you not freaking out? Yelling at me?”

“Is there anything we can do about it?” you asked, steady.

“Well--” he trailed off. Obviously, there’s nothing you can do about it. He came, it’s too late.

“I’ll be careful next time, I promise.” he apologized and kissed you.

Once the panic disappeared, Joel remembered that you didn’t come. He got carried away by his own pleasure, he completely forgot about yours. “Don’t move,” he ordered you and made a trail of wet kisses down to your core. You moaned when his lips reached your clit and he smirked. He licked and sucked on your clit for a moment, one of his arms around your waist to keep you still. When he felt your hand running through his hair, and your nails digging on his scalp, he moaned himself. “Fuck, you’re tasting yourself,” you breathed out.

“I couldn’t care less.” he muttered.

As he kept eating like a starving man, Joel surprised you with a thick finger entering your core. “Jesus, Joel! Yes!” you cried and he didn’t waste time adding another finger. His fingers were curling inside you, hitting exactly where they were supposed and he remained sucking hard on your clit. “Just like that, yes! Fuck!” he felt your body shaking under him and his free hand immediately rushed to your breasts, pinching your nipples between his thumb and index. He didn’t stop, not even slowed down until you came hard on his face, crying his name so loud, all Jackson probably heard you.

As you were catching your breath, Joel got back on top of you and wrapped an arm around your neck. He held you so tight, you almost couldn't breathe but you loved every second of it. You were surprised by his length teasing your oversensitive entrance, “I’ve never recovered this fast in my life.” he growled in your ear. “Can I?” he asked for your consent, gently kissing your temple.

“Yes please! Give it to me, baby. Fuck me!”

That was all he needed. He didn’t need his hand to slide inside of you again. In one thrust, he bottomed out and cursed. “You were made for me,” he said, huskily, before kissing you, all teeth and tongue.

As he thrusted hard and deep inside your pussy, you grabbed his ass and squeezed. He chuckled against your mouth and quickened his pace. He fucked you relentlessly again but this time, he took his time. There was less urge, he was thinking about your pleasure too.

He finally let go of your neck, and got on his knees, lifting your hips a little. Your ass was resting on his thighs as he kept thrusting. That angle drove both of you crazy. While one of his hands was holding your hips hard, he furiously rubbed your clit with the other. He could feel you're losing it. “I’m gonna cum, baby,” you told him. “Fuck, you feel so good!” you cried his name again, coming and creaming on his cock.

“God, I’ll never get used to that sight,” Seeing you losing it under his touch sent him over the edge. He managed to withdraw just in time to come on your stomach, he didn’t even have to give himself a few final strokes.

He collapsed on top of you again, not caring about the sticky mess between your bodies. “You’ll be the death of me, Y/N,” he said and you chuckled.

“I love you, Joel. There’s no better than you,”

[negasonicimagines]

Closer (NSFW)

synopsis: Ellie’s a beta. You’re...not.

notes & warnings: this is a/b/o smut with an alpha!reader, that means you have a retractable dick. don’t like = don’t read. also: genital repulsion is 100% valid, but genitals ≠ gender, and Ellie was using dick/penis/etc in place of the word boys/men/etc which is addressed and corrected! overstimulation kink aplenty! and, for the first time on negasonicteenageimagines, wing kink! implied babypool!reader, which I will probably address in a part 2 one day! I'm sorry I've been gone so long, had a really demanding job that sucked the life out of me and I'm just living on savings while I try to recuperate.

Ellie loves the feeling of your hands on her; running down her sides, nervously feeling her chest or ass through her clothes, but she hates when you grab onto her hips and stop her.

“Y/N…” She sighs, stroking your flushed face. She’s straddling your lap, you’ve been trading kisses and teasing touches for the past little while.

“I just- Just need a sec, to cool down,” you tell her. Like it’s wrong that you want her; that she wants you.

“Why?” Ellie asks, and you look up at her with a bit of a hurt expression. She knows why. You don’t think she can handle you. You haven’t said it, but it’s pretty clear. “W- Wait, I’m sorry. You don’t owe me an explanation. If you don’t want to, then I don’t want to, okay?”

“I mean, I do, you’re so…” Your hands tighten around her hips and she throbs, she wishes she could just melt into the touch. “I do. But…”

“I know,” Ellie sighs again.

“Can I hold you?” you request.

“Let me. You don’t have to be all-alpha, all the time. You should let me take care of you, y’know?”

“Mmkay,” you agree, letting her guide you so that you’re on top of her. You sink into her— not in the way that either of you would prefer —and let her tend to you, petting your hair and humming some old emo song. She strokes your wings next, and you shudder when she gets closer to the downy feathers between them. “E- El, we’re stopping, remember?”

“Right, sorry. Those softer feathers just feel so nice.”

“Thanks…” you mumble sleepily, and she smiles, though you can’t see it. You’ve always been self-conscious about your wings, but Ellie’s seen the beauty in them from the moment she first saw you. She’s seen the beauty in you since then, too.

Being with you is a dream, even if you’re not ready to take the next step. She just wishes she could reassure you; make everything better. It’s what you deserve.

“Dinner soon,” she softly warns, and you whine, closing your eyes tighter. “Babe, seriously, it’s too late for a nap.”

“Then what are you doing being such a good pillow, hm?” you argue.

She stammers before scoffing.

“Mhm, that’s what I thought,” you murmur.

“You’re lucky I like you,” Ellie teases.

“I know,” you hum, nuzzling. She’s probably covered in your scent at this point.

“You know, I get a lot of glares from your fan club when you do that,” Ellie grumbles, but she doesn’t really mind. She’s proud that everyone knows that she’s yours, and the other way around.

“My huh-what-now?”

“You know, that little group of omegas that…” Ellie trails off. She’s not sure whether she’s annoyed or grateful that you haven’t noticed. “They just really like you, that’s all.”

You’re not sure what it is. Betas have scents so light that emotion isn’t detectable, but maybe you can subconsciously smell the variation. Maybe it’s her tone, the way it slips from genuine nonchalance to something… Tense.

Whatever you’ve picked up on, it snaps you to attention. You sit up.

“What’s wrong?”

Ellie blinks at you. Out of respect to her, you do your best to suppress your overprotective tendencies. Clearly, you’re not making an exception for her this time. Your wings are all puffed up.

“Eleanor.” You only say her full first name when you’re serious. Usually it’s anger. “What’s wrong? Did they say something to you? Did they do something?”

“I- They just think you deserve a proper mate, or whatever. It’s not like you disagree, there’s a reason we haven’t done that.”

“Yeah, there is, but it isn’t something as superficial as that. You’re joking, right?”

“What? No, they really-“

“Fuck them, I don’t care what they think. I care what you think. Do you really think I’ve been holding back because you’re not an omega?”

“Well… Yeah.”

“Wow, um… Wow. Thanks for that, El. Didn’t know you thought that little of me, but… Cool.”

“Then what is it? Because I can’t think of any other reason!” Ellie snaps.

“Are you fucking serious?! Are you that fucking idiotic?!” You snap harder, you get up from the bed, and Ellie blinks in shock again.

“What?!”

“Ellie, you have said about a million times that you don’t like dick.”

Ellie’s furious expression immediately drops into one of regret, thinking of all the times she’s expressed utter repulsion towards your genitalia without even thinking.

“Yeah, I am that fucking idiotic,” she realizes. ”Oh, fuck, I really should’ve adjusted my language. I don’t like men! Fake dicks and ones otherwise attached to girls are fine,” Ellie explains. “Oh, jeez, Y/N, I’m so sorry. Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry. Hugs okay?”

You nod tearfully, she gets up, and she wraps her arms around your waist. You hug her neck, pressing her into your chest while your wings also wrap around her.

“I’m really sorry,” Ellie apologizes a third time. “I can’t believe I was such a freaking jerk. Those omegas are right, I really don’t deserve you.”

“El, it’s okay. We’re all learning. I should’ve told you what you were saying was bothering me.”

“But, I mean, what I was saying wasn’t just insensitive to alpha women, it was transphobic. I mean, it’d be one thing if I was genuinely repulsed, but... I’m definitely not. I was so thoughtless,” she insists.

“Like I said, we’re all learning. You acknowledged what you were saying was wrong, and how, and now you're growing from it. That’s all anyone can expect,” you reassure her.

“I love you,” she says.

“I love you too,” you reply, holding her tighter. “I’m really sorry for getting mad at you. I should’ve known you’d feel self-conscious, and that other people would see a problem with us. I just… I guess I’m so happy to finally be with you, that… I don’t know. I forget that everything else still sucks.”

“Babe…” Ellie coos, looking up at you. You look into her eyes, and your frown is turned upside down. She grins back. “You’re so beautiful.”

Instead of embracing her, you now cup her cheeks with your hands, pulling her in for a kiss that gets deeper and deeper until Ellie’s under you with one of your thighs between her legs.

You two have never gone as far as to stimulate those areas, but it’s about time. You continue to devour each other, you fondle her chest before literally starting to tear her shirt off, not wanting to part from the kiss but wanting her to be wearing way less clothing.

She gives a surprised gasp, lips leaving yours.

You whine.

“You were literally ripping my shirt off.”

“It’s a plain black one. You have, like, five,” you grumble, bitter that you’re having to take a pause. She looks at you with frustration, but notices just how clenched your jaw is, the way your hands shake.

You’re starving for her. For anything, probably, hardwired to spend at least a week straight every month fucking. How long have you two been together now? Loyalty may be the bare minimum, but she feels the need to reward you for it somehow. You had plenty of opportunity to fulfill your needs elsewhere.

Ellie takes her shirt off, chuckling to herself at the realization that it’s now a v-neck instead of the ring-neck it was. She unbuttons your shirt, helping your slip your wings out of the window in the back.

Your eyes rake over her body, but you don’t touch, not without permission. Ellie’s always loved observing you, photography has made her a bit of a voyeur. Watching someone as beautiful as you hold back such primal urges is downright delicious.

She can’t help but resume kissing you, lips and teeth and tongue mashing together. It’s animalistic.

“Can I please touch-“ Ellie’s cut off with a moan, the seam of her skinny jeans and the pressure of your thigh hitting just right. “Mm, wings?”

You hesitate.

“I’ll be gentle,” Ellie pleads.

“Okay,” you consent, resuming your kissing.

You’ll never forget the first time she touched your wings like this.

You two hadn’t just started dating, but you hadn’t been together for long. You were snuggling on the couch watching some movie or show on Netflix.

At first, she was just stroking your back, right above where you’re most sensitive, if it wouldn’t mat your feathers, you’d cover it up completely.

You’d tensed up a little at how close she was to the soft, more tender feathers, but she hadn’t noticed. She danced her fingertips further down and continued to stroke.

You choked on air, scrambling away from her quickly and blushing like crazy.

“What?” Ellie asked incredulously.

“I- Um- How do I put this?” You were still panting. “It’s gradual, like, um, for the most part it’s not very sensitive, but when you get closer to, um, the center of my wings, um…”

“Oh, fuck, I’m sorry, I didn’t know it hurt,” Ellie apologized, and though her tone didn’t betray it, you could see in her eyes that she felt awful.

You quickly shook your head.

“Wait, then… Oh. Oh!” Now she was blushing. “Sorry.”

This time, she’s skipped over the less sensitive parts again, not even building up to where she’s touching now, right in the center. You moan into her neck, clinging to her as she toys with the raven feathers between your shoulder blades.

She chuckles, and you growl.

“That’s cute,” Ellie murmurs, and you start to rut against her thigh again, feeling your member start to harden, and therefore extend from your body. “Big bad alpha, but I bet if I asked you’d let me put a collar on you, wouldn’t you?”

“Holy fuck, yes,” you moan. No girl has ever made you feel this way before. Of course, you’ve had sex before, but... It’s always been about the other person. Knot me, choke me, tie me up, Alpha, please, you remember the whines of past partners, whether they were omegas or simply curious alphas, and you appreciate Ellie’s independence, her borderline dominance. Maybe this time will be a little more vanilla, but the thought of...

“Kiss me again.”

You obey, and this continues for a bit longer, her mumbling sweet, disgusting nothings while you get bigger and harder and closer.

“El, I- I’m so-“

“Huge?” Ellie attempts to fill in the blank, intimidated by your size. It’s bigger than her strap by a long shot.

You just whine.

“Can I- Can I see?” she requests. Your cock is straining against your bottoms, so you’re happy to take them off as she removes her own. She urges you to prop yourself against some pillows and allow her to be on top. Her already doe-like eyes are even wider. “I- Uh- May I?” She has a hand outstretched.

You stutter before settling on nodding. Her hand carefully wraps around you, she slides her fist up and down so slowly. You give a trembling sigh.

“This okay?” you ask, still nervous.

“Mhm,” Ellie quickly responds, cheeks turning redder. She runs her thumb over the head— well, more like a face, since it’s your clitoris and some of the skin that surrounds it —and you squeal. “Alright, I think I kind of get it,” she mumbles.

“You think?” you choke out as she continues to stimulate the bundle of nerves; she bites her lip to hold back a smirk. You’re careful not to buck your hips, wanting her to go at her own pace. You instead roll your shoulders, wings feeling cramped with the way you’re sitting.

She notices.

“Here.” Ellie takes a pillow from beside you and has you lean forward. When you recline again, it’s thick enough to keep you off the headboard and it’s right between your wings, so every time you move…

“C-Clever,” you stammer, and she reaches out to stroke your cheek. You don’t know why, but you flinch.

“Shh… It’s okay. I’m not gonna hurt you, babe.”

You nod. You know.

“You alright?” she asks.

You nod again.

“Can you use your words?”

“Yeah, I’m okay,” you reassure her, letting go of a breath you didn’t realize you were holding.

“Do you wanna keep going?” She’s so beautiful; so perfect. She likes to pretend she doesn’t care, about anything, but she lets you have the truth. She does, often too much. And she loves you.

“Please.”

Your enthusiasm hasn’t waned even a bit, Ellie notices, and she starts to stimulate you with both hands now, thumb sweeping over your clit while she strokes up and down your cock.

Your knot starts to swell, just a little.

“Hng, El, wait,” you tell her, and she tears her hands away immediately, looking concerned again. “Nothing bad, I just… Can I please finish you off at least once, before I do?”

“Oh, uh, sure.”

“Really?” She sounded… Hesitant.

“Yeah,” she says with a relieved smile. “You just surprised me, that’s all.”

You’re trying not to give into your instincts, to not throw her down onto the bed and just take, but it must be obvious with the way you hesitate to even touch her as you try to readjust your positions.

“Babe, you know I want this, right? You don’t have to be careful.”

You look down at your dick, and then skeptically at her. She follows your gaze.

“You’re as small as an omega but with none of the evolutionary traits to keep me from breaking you.”

Ellie’s cheeks flush. You always know when she wants to tell you something— or if she has some sort of request —but she’s too embarrassed or nervous, her lips curl inwards, pressed into a thin line. Her eyebrows pop up, just a little, and the puppy eyes just barely start to form, though they avoid yours.

You look to her expectantly.

“What if I want to be broken?”

“You don’t know what you’re asking for,” you argue, and it’s shaky. You want her, you want to do this for her, you want to give her everything.

“I’m asking for you. All of you,” she insists. “Please.”

You nod, before taking her face in your hands once more and pressing your lips to hers. The gentle kissing devolves into practically devouring her lips with yours.

You mouth at her neck, at all of her, nibbling and licking and sucking until you reach what you’ve been aching for and tug her boxers off, burying your face in her and finally getting to eat.

“H-holy fucking…” Ellie’s grateful that you’re too focused on the task at hand to look up at her.

You slide one finger in, then another, curling as you use the tip of your tongue to stimulate her clit. You continue to prep her, she realizes with a smile, as she gets closer and closer.

“Could I…?” Her fingers tangle in your hair, but she doesn’t dare to pull. You growl. She’ll take that as a no.

She doesn’t tighten her grip, instead moving her hands to the sheets, but she still rocks against your mouth, begging for more, for release. This certainly isn’t what she’s used to.

“I- Ah- Y/N, fuck, don’t stop, please,” she pants, Eventually, despite her impatience, her moans turn into nonsense until she’s finally over the edge. You work her through it, or, at least, that’s what she assumes you’re doing, until she’s clearly overstimulated and you don’t stop.

She did just ask for all of you, including the sex drive, the insatiable urge to please your partner, and everything else that comes with being an alpha.

The feeling just keeps building and she continues to twitch under you, whimpering and clutching the sheets until a gasp is torn from her lungs and she’s finished once more.

You don’t stop.

The third one comes out of nowhere, she doesn’t feel close at all until suddenly it’s there and she’s crashing over like a waterfall, drowning in pleasure.

“I- That’s- That’s enough, please,” Ellie insists. You lick a slow, wide stripe from her entrance to her clit before sitting up. “Could I, um… Return the favor?”

“You want to?” Your head tilts in confusion. You’re still self-conscious, she realizes.

“I do.” She gets out of the way so that you can lay back down, pillow between your wings and cock still hard and exposed between your spread legs. She tentatively starts to give you a handy again, still unsure of where to start. “I, uh… I don’t think I can fit all that. Is that okay?”

“Of course. You really don’t have to do it at all, I don’t mind.”

“I want to,” she insists, before starting to suckle on the tip, smoothing her tongue over your clit again and again. You sink your teeth into your bottom lip, hard, toes curling. She slowly inches down before gagging and pulling off with a rather cliche pop.

She looks gorgeous with tears in her eyes. She tries again, now knowing her limits but still pushing them every now and then. She uses her hands to make up for what she can’t fit in her mouth, rather skillfully.

“Wait, I- Hng, Ellie, stop,” you moan.

She pulls off, looking worried.

“I- I don’t wanna finish until I’m inside you,” you quietly explain, now you’re avoiding her eyes. She smiles softly, before opening the drawer on her bedside table and grabbing a box of alpha condoms.

“Will these work?”

You nod.

“And would you like to fuck me now?”

“Don’t say it like that!” you protest, before clamping a hand over your mouth, surprised at how bratty you sound.

“Rather whiny for an alpha,” she taunts. “How would you like for me to say it, then?”

Her eyebrow arches and you swear you could finish if she just kept looking at you like that, with that challenge in her eyes that no one else would dare to look at you with. You start leaking precum, and she bites back a smirk once again, waiting for your answer.

“I- Uh… I don’t know. Just, not so vulgar. You’re- You’re special. This is special. Not just…”

It clicks. You’re not sure how it does for her, but it almost always does. She’s intuitive, at least, when it comes to you. Her expression softens. This time, at least, she knows when to stop.

“I get it. Please, I’m ready for you to- I mean, I’ve practiced with my strap, but other than that, no one’s ever- No one's ever done that for me. I want you to.”

You rearrange yourselves once more, letting her rest on the bed and putting a spare pillow under her hips.

You kiss her lips like you’re starting all over, slowly kissing every inch of her. She’s delicious, soft and smooth and tender. You want to sink your teeth in.

You don’t, instead opting to rise up and sink a couple fingers into her, adding a third once you think she can take it.

Ellie tightens around your curling fingers, desperate for more. She rocks downwards, she wants to be filled.

“Okay, love, I get it,” you reassure her in a near whisper.

You take one of the alpha condoms and roll it on before carefully lining up with her entrance.

“Ha, don’t tease,” she whines. This is a little closer to what you’re used to. You slide right in, well, as much of you as you can actually fit, which is just over half your length. You’re not quite sure if you’ve bottomed out or if she’s not relaxed enough.

“Is it okay to move?” you wonder.

“Please,” she says, and so you do, starting with a slow, gentle pace before taking it up a notch. You’re fucking her wide open, but you’re still being careful as she turns into a mess of moans under you.

Eventually, though, you just can’t help yourself. You’re practically drilling into her, and now you know you’ve bottomed out because she’s taking all of you, flawlessly.

“Oh, fuck, I-“ Ellie continues to pant, calves propped on your shoulders. “You’re so- I- Y/N, fuck- You- I-“

“Sh-sh-sh, it’s okay. I know. I know.” You can barely string together words yourself, you two fit like you’re made for each other, she squeezes around you so perfectly while you abuse that spot deep inside of her that makes her eyes roll back and her flushed, swollen lips fall wide open. “You’re so perfect.”

“You, too, I- I love you,” she manages, and it’s the best thing she could’ve said. It always is. You kiss her forehead and her knees are now hooked over your shoulders, bringing you even closer. You keep taking her, eventually it’s just too much and she reaches between the two of you, stroking her clit so she can come undone again.

And when she does, her walls flutter around you, getting you right back on the edge. She reaches behind you, running her fingertips over that sensitive spot between your wings so teasingly, so fleetingly, and yet it finishes you; whimpering and moaning and groaning into the pillow, right next to her head.

You knot her without even thinking as you unravel together, and the two of you soak in your euphoria for a few moments before speaking.

“Thank you,” you quietly say.

“I think I should be thanking you,” she scoffs. “What do you have to thank me for?”

“For letting me have you like this. For trusting me. For loving me and understanding me. Everything, I have everything to thank you for,” you explain.

“You’re gonna make me cry,” Ellie grumbles. But she holds your hands in hers like she did almost the entire time you were fucking her into the mattress. “I… I wanna be on top.”

“Um… With proper prep that could definitely work, but we’re a bit stuck at the moment,” you explain.

“Good to know, but... I meant that I want to ride you,” Ellie reiterates.

“Oh. Uh, sure.” You two carefully readjust yourselves.

“I’ve always wondered what it felt like to be knotted,” she admits.

“Is it alright? I- I didn’t consciously do it, I’m sorry for not asking.”

“It’s not a big deal, you’re wearing an alpha condom, plus I’m on birth control so…” She looks at you for a few beats of silence before smiling. “It feels great. It’s… It’s nice, being connected like this.”

It’s a bit awkward, all of it, but it’s... New. Different. Perfect. It’s her.

Ellie rocks back and forth a little, figuring out what works best for her and confirming that it’s comfortable for you before continuing.

Lower, drawn-out moans drip from her lips like syrup as she unintentionally edges you, working up to that perfect peak over and over before switching up the pace or pressure or angle and sending you right back to the start.

You grab Ellie’s hips and snarl. She did say she wanted to be broken, maybe she’s trying to urge you to do so.

She pauses, now fully noticing your flushed cheeks, your heaving chest, the need in your eyes. She nods.

You fuck up into her like she’s just your human fleshlight, hands grasping her hips bruisingly.

“So tight,” you groan through gritted teeth, thrusting up into her faster and harder until her needy whimpers, the way she moans your name, and the new, unique sensation of being inside a beta destroys and remakes you once again.

She’s shuddering too, you realize.

“Are you alright?”

She nods, looking spooked, and winded, of course.

“Are you sure?” you confirm.

She nods again.

“Just… I, um… I finished. Without touching my, um… My clit. Never had that happen before,” she reassures you, also stroking your ego.

“Glad to be of service,” you say with a smile, but your stomach growls. “I say I go get dinner after the knot deflates, ‘kay?”

“What about me?” Ellie wonders.

“I’m not just gonna let you walk after that, even if you could,” you argue. “I’ll bring it back here, to the d- To the ne- Here.”

“It can be our den. Our nest. Is that what you want?” Ellie offers. You nod, looking fretful.

“Just- Just right now, okay? I promise.”

“Babe, you know I want to be with you, right? I don’t just tolerate your instincts, they’re a part of you, I love them as much as I do the rest of you,” she insists, readjusting herself so that she’s laying on top of you instead of straddling you, knot still locked in.

“But you-“ She always teases you about them. Not just every now and then, every time you slip up like that until now, she’s made some remark.

“But what?” Ellie reaches up, stroking your cheek again. You don’t flinch this time, too blissed out.

“I just- Most jokes have a hint of truth to them… So when it feels like you constantly tease me for being an alpha, especially the inconvenience of it…”

“Oh, jeez, I’m- I’m sorry, I... I really am a fucking idiot.”

“You’re not. I shouldn’t have said that,” you disagree.

“I shouldn’t have been making you feel so bad about yourself,” she insists, giving you a kiss, and then another. You deepen it, your nails digging into her back. “Fuck, babe…”

“Thank you…” you drawl, giggling with pride shortly after. You sigh. “I think, uh, I think we can probably part ways now. If you want.”

“Not yet,” Ellie quickly says, pleasantly surprising you. You hold her tighter. “Hey, uh… So… I- Could we- I mean, you- I- We’ve been together a while, and I was just wondering, is it customary for… Ugh, never mind.”

“Sweetness?” you question, concerned.

There’s a decent bit of silence. You can’t see her face, but you can guess the expression: pressed lips, slightly raised eyebrows, the works.

“Would you ever… Want to bite me?”

“I just did, like, a lot,” you say.

“No, I mean-! I mean, like bite me,” she clarifies.

“Oh. Well, I mean, I guess. It wouldn’t have much use, ‘cause the only benefits are scent-related, and I already crave your scent when I’m stressed, and you don’t know what I smell like. We would just be… Clingier to each other than we already are,” you explain.

Her face falls.

“Well, I wouldn’t mind you being a little needier… And it sure would piss off those stupid omegas you were telling me about. Obviously, I want to claim you, you’re mine, but… I just want you to be aware of what it means, how it’ll affect you,” you add to what she probably received as rejection of the idea. “Do you still want this?”

“I do,” Ellie consents. You cradle the back of her head in one hand, tilting it to the side to better access her neck—and therefore her scent gland. You gently kiss the skin first, building up to the bite like you’re trying to create another hickey.

Eventually, though, you sink your teeth in. Ellie tenses up, clinging to you and giving a soft whine of pain before relaxing and just letting it happen. You lick up the blood just a little before realizing you’re just going to have to give up and let it bleed for a bit. You can tend to it later.

“Thank you,” she says, so quietly. “For everything.”

“You’re gonna make me cry,” you echo what she said earlier. You slip her off of you, letting your arousal fade and carefully tucking your member back in after tying off the condom and throwing it away.

“You know, I hadn’t really thought about what that might look like,” Ellie confesses, looking bewildered. You just laugh, and while she blushes, she laughs with you.

“You’re so beautiful,” you tell her. You truly feel like you have to touch her to prove that she’s real. She’s so perfect, you’re so perfect together.

The need for dinner feels a lot more…primal. Like an instinct to care for your mate, especially now that you can feel her hunger simmering in the edges of your mind. You don’t want to leave her, but you also desperately need to take care of her.

She can tell that you’re torn.

“What is it?”

“Food. I-“ You sigh, frustrated. “I wanna stay with you, but I need to get you some food.”

Her expression was already softened, at least compared to the expressions she makes outside of this room you share… This den, you think with glee. But, now it’s even gentler.

“Well, I am pretty hungry… So, why don’t you get us some food, and then we can eat it in here. I think they had pizza for dinner, just get me a couple slices of-“

“The vegan thin crust, I know,” you cut her off. You now have a mission. You give her a long smooch on the forehead before getting up and getting dressed, reapplying your deodorant and some perfume or cologne, if you desire. “Love you.”

“You too,” Ellie calls as you close the door, making your way to the kitchen.

The pizza’s been put up for a while, so you decide you’ll reheat it in the oven, instead of the microwave. You get two pans out, if your pizza choice isn’t vegan, and you go ahead and spray them with cooking spray while you wait for the oven to preheat. You carefully place the slices on each baking sheet.

You don’t want to leave the oven unattended, so you instead reflect on everything that just happened, pride bubbling up in your chest.

You love her so much it hurts.

The oven heats up quickly, so you set the pans inside and put a timer on your phone so can go check on Ellie. You make your way to the stairs, but when you get to the foyer, you realize Ellie’s there, along with a red-suited man.

You resist the urge to approach, knowing it’ll only embarrass and irritate her if you go all cuckoo alpha mode on her in front of someone. She gets a little closer to him, and he hands her a present that’s wrapped… Exquisitely, at least in comparison to your present-wrapping skills.

But his entire posture changes the second he sees you observing.

You decide then to waltz on over, curious about the strange character.

“Who’s this, babe?” you wonder, wrapping an arm around her.

“Oh, this is Deadpool. Just bringing by a horrifically late Hanukkah present.”

“Pleasure to meet you, Deadpool.”

“We’ve met before,” he says softly.

“We have? Shit, sorry, I’m better with faces than names, and yours is covered up, so…”

“It was a long time ago,” he nearly mumbles.

“Okay,” you chirp, not sure how else to respond. “You hungry? I’m reheating some leftover pizza. In case you couldn’t tell, we kind of missed dinner.”

“Y/N!” Ellie protests, turning completely red.

“You know he can smell it on you, right?” you chuckle, before whispering to her: “And I bet you’re walking funny.”

Ellie stammers. Apparently, she didn’t know.

“You two make an adorable couple,” he says, but he sounds sad. Maybe he’s missing his own lover, his scent radiates loss. “I, uh… I don’t think you’d be offering me pizza if you realized who I was.”

“Oh, please, murder isn’t a big deal, even if Ellie and the other hall monitors have a problem with it.”

“You’re gonna have to take Remedial Ethics again if anybody hears you say that,” Ellie chides you.

“They can’t make me, I’ve already graduated. Besides, taking that class so many times gave me a shit ton of extra credits and a sexy little 4.2 GPA,” you snicker. “Yo, DP, if they ever try and get you to take it, just pick the answers that seem like the least amount of fun. Easy peasy.”

“Wow,” Deadpool scoffs, before turning somber once more. “It was nice meeting you again, Y/N.”

“You, too,” you reply, and he’s on his not-so-merry way. “What’s up with him? Isn’t he supposed to be all goofy and vulgar?”

“I don’t know, he’s a pretty moody guy.”

“Huh.” The alarm on your phone goes off, and you help Ellie hobble along to the kitchen.

After letting it cool, you two decide to eat right there, rinsing off the pans before putting them in the empty dishwasher.

Despite her protests, you carry her up the stairs, plopping her in bed before ditching your pants and joining her. She loses her own.

“Round two?” you tease.

“My vagina hurts,” she grumbles.

“Really? I’m sorry, I tried to be careful.“

“No, not like that, you were good. Too good, gave me the pounding of my life,” she reiterates.

“Oh… Thanks.”

“Don’t pretend you’re surprised, those omegas don’t just like you for your wit. You have a reputation.”

“So, they do like me for my wit,” you remark.

“Shut up,” she scoffs at the double entendres. “I love you.”

“I love you, too. You were perfect. I mean, even if you weren’t, you would be, but… That was amazing.”

“You’re too much,” Ellie mumbles, blushing. You kiss her, but she’s the one to intensify it. “...Okay, maybe round two.”

“You gotta teach me how to do that.”

“Do what?” Ellie asks, and she does it again.

“That!” you emphasize.

“What?!”

“Raise one eyebrow!”

“Oh. I don’t do it consciously,” she says. Of course she doesn’t. She’s just perfect.

“Fuck you,” you tell her instead.

“Fuck you.” But she laughs.

“Like, now?” you retort.

“Shut up.” She snuggles you closer. “Can I hold you, now?”

“I guess…” you pretend to complain, and you quickly find your face buried in Ellie’s chest, one arm curled between your bodies and the other around her.

“Ah, my best friends,” you joke, nuzzling.

“You fucking bastard,” she chuckles.

“Just because it’s true, doesn’t mean you should say it,” you sing-song. But the word doesn’t sting when she says it. It’s a term of endearment, now.

“We should probably go to sleep,” Ellie says, upon glancing at her phone.

“Probably,” you admit. “I love you so much.”

“You’re so fucking gay,” she huffs, grinning.

“Really? What clued you in? Is it the way I dress? Or maybe it’s the way I fucked you into the mattress an hour ago…” You play at pensivity, and Ellie, Ellie giggles, rolling her eyes.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

[moon-ursidae]

GAME SESSION 4 RECAP

i’ve had a very emotionally draining day even before playing this so we’ll see what awaits me beyond the start screen this time HAHA

as always, spoilers for both games and the hbo series below!! (this one is L O N G)

i want to play today but i’m also going through it so we’ll see how this plays out lmao

hours played: 8 or 9 hours?? somewhere around there idk when i started

KICKIN IT OFF:

so i’m kinda scared bc joel and ellie are in the same clothes that they’re in during the winter section which i’ve seen some clips of. which means hurt/sick joel soon? and uhhh DAVID. so yknow. kinda nervous about that.

excited to see nolan and troy in another project together tho. a dynamic duo in the gaming industry truly.

omg this section is called go big horns. CUTE

i don’t remember what i did last haha but i’m in a dorm hall? we’ll see what happens

OH i’m supposed to get a gate open. slay

i love when joel gets on the horse he says “scoot.” LIKE HE DID W SARAH ON THE COUCH🥲😭

god i wish fall would fucking GET HERE

sorry the jacket on joel looks so cozy

i’m so on edge rn it’s too quiet

uh ooohhhh muthafuckin spores

i knew it was too quiet i’m so scared bro

if there’s a bloater here i will exit the game LMAO

okay in this one room there’s a melee weapon, a bomb, and arrows. not liking the looks of this so far

do i really have to drop down tho?? do i??

FUCKIN HELL I DON’T LIKE THIS AT ALL

i’m gonna try to coax my dog to sit in here w me HAHAHA

okay well they’re both not having it

ANYWAY

I FUCKING HEAR A BLOATER UR JOKING

i threw a bottle down the hall and was SPAMMING square to open this door holy fuck

that was so close i was literally like “pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease” holy fuck dude

i feel like every infected known to man is gonna seep through the walls of this campus when i turn this generator on

i was wondering if joel went to college

him being more open w ellie🥺

“ok.” “too much?” “too much.” i’m gonna fucking cry again. i love seeing the more sensitive side of joel, because he clearly is quite sensitive. he doesn’t like bringing up sarah that often, he doesn’t want to talk about what happened with his wife. he’s clearly still affected by these things. he’s just had to shove those feelings down and become hardened by the apocalypse. he still cares under his grizzled and weathered surface.🥺

i also love the development of how ellie respects his boundaries and doesn’t push too much further into his past after the ranch house conversation. after he says it’s too much, she doesn’t say anything else. GOD the writing is so so good

OMG WAIT i forgot to mention the duct tape on joel’s boots like forever ago. i like that they added that detail in the show too :)

if anything happens to callus while i’m in here, i will simply cry

“c’mon kiddo, give me your hand” 🥺

dude bros i’m so scared for when joel is gonna get hurt bc i most definitely remember it being near brick buildings? and all of these buildings fall into that category? and joel is in the same clothes? i am uhh how you say…SCARED

max health let’s gooooooo

so whoever is here has definitely been watching us. they made a sound RIGHT upstairs and they cleared out that fast?? they’ve absolutely been watching us and i’m scared that they heard ellie say that we have the cure to mankind🫠

sure are a lot of bottles and bricks up here 👀

dog break bc they needed to get some energy out

BACK TO THE GAME

BRO THAT’S SO SCARY THAT PEOPLE CAN MOVE THIS FAST

so we’re not gonna investigate that??

just pushin’ on?? this is not looking good bros

yoooooo this xray looks DOPE

i really don’t wanna open this door

IT WAS MONKEYS THE TIME

THE MONKEYS ARE A FALSE ALARM I KNOW IT DEEP IN MY BONES WHY ELSE WOULD THERE BE 500 BRICKS AND BOTTLES

THEY INJECTED THE MONKEYS????

broooooo

uh oh cutscene i am scared

to utah!! right?

why did he stop? joel please not now

uh oh spaghetti-o’s!

do i have to go back the way i came???? that was SO FAR BRO

fuuuuck

OH NO JOEL PLZ NOT OVER THE RAILS PLEASE

ELLIE??? NO HELP??? WH-?????

oh fuck goddamnit the railing BROKE

IMPALED????????? WHAT????????

FUCKING IMPALED?????

I’M GONNA START CRYING NO

THE STRUGGLED BREATHS??

HIM REACHING OUT TO ELLIE??????

STILL PROTECTING HER AS HE’S LITERALLY IMPALED STOP

THE TEARING SOUNDS???

JOEL YELLING???

I’M GONNA CRY BRO

STOP I HATE THIS

ELLIE IS SO SCARED

UUUUGH DUDE

SAYING HE’S FINE?? TO NOT SCARE HER?? OR TO TRICK HIS OWN BRAIN?? PROBABLY BOTH?

i know he’s gonna be okay but i am still very much in distress

his hands are COVERED in blood :(

this hurts my soul

oh my god she’s covered in blood too :((

ELLIE’S BEING SUCH A HELP ASSURING HIM I-

he doesn’t wanna put his weight on her and slow them down further :(

“then fucking walk” LMAO

the trail of blood 🥲

HER HELPING HIM I CAN’T DO THIS

HEY FUCKER LET GO OF THE HORSE

omg ellie is badass bro

i mean i knew that already but goddamn she’s really steppin up

oh my god please don’t fall of the horse joel

…he fell off the fucking horse

HE LOOKS SO PALE :(

I’M GETTING FLASHBACKS TO HER SAYING GET UP TO HIM 😭

WINTER?? we must’ve been in mid-late november just now then

THE ICONIC RABBIT

SLAY ELLIE

this feels so fucking weird playing ellie

i bet anyone playing this without spoilers for the first time was panicking thinking joel was dead

oh it takes her a hot minute to climb

DETAILS

gotta take that into account tho i’m so used to big grumpy texas man

“what is this place?” GIRL DON’T GO

NOLAN NORTH IS IN THERE

talking to herself in reassurance :(

took a food break

OH MY GOD OKAY UHHHH WAS NOT EXPECTING DAVID THIS EARLY

YES ELLIE

ellie i don’t think they have antibiotics

i fucking love ellie dude

“i’ve had some practice” i love how even when it’s ellie’s there’s essences of joel here

like he literally taught her how to use the rifle🥲

bro am i playing COD zombies or??

i do not trust david at all. i know he’s helping me to build trust but he’ll totally fuck me over later

i only trust joel to boost me bro

BLOATER??

i just started nailing that motherfucker with molotovs and bombs. that seems to work well :)

DO NOT touch ellie bro

“we make a pretty good team” don’t get ahead of yourself here dAvId. i’ve known you for like 10 minutes

I REMEMBER SEEING MOCAP VIDEO OF THIS SCENE

crazy man traveling with a little girl? uh sir, i don’t know if you’ve noticed, but there is no man with ellie. and she covered up saying she has a group as well.

what man? ellie is alone. LEAVE HER ALONE DAVID.

“you’re just a kid.” with YOUR RIFLE pointed at YOUR FACE bro shut the hell up

oh well… now that’s not fair james can fuck off

are we sure this is medicine??? this could be fucking poison dawg

“i can protect you” nah i’m good there’s a grumpy texas man waiting for me

bro they’re gonna follow ellie and she’s gonna lead them right to joel and shit’s gonna go down i feel it in my bones

JOELLLLLLL

he’s looking worse for wear

my heart w this music UGH

STOP. HIM SHIVERING AND HER CHECKING HIS TEMP ON HIS HEAD

AND THEN LAYING NEXT TO HIM

AND HE’S LOOKING OVER AT HER

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

THEY’VE COME SO FARRRRRRR

what THE FUCK did i say

GODDAMNIT

YEA THEY TRACKED YOU

KINDA EASY TO DO THAT IN THE SNOW

ELLIE I’M NOT MAD AT YOU I’M JUST STRESSED

HER KEEPING HIM UPDATED EVEN THOUGH HE MIGHT BE SO OUT OF IT I CANNOT

THE WAY HE STIRRED WHEN SHE SAID SHE WAS GONNA DRAW THEM AWAY HE WANTS TO GET UP AND FIGHT FOR HERRRRRRRR AAAHHHHHHH

NOOO CALLUS NO BRO NOOOOOOO

I’M HAVING RDR2 FLASHBACKS

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

WHY DO I STILL GET ATTACHED WHEN I KNOW WHAT’S GONNA HAPPEN EVERY. FUCKING. TIME

okay stealth with ellie is kinda fun

the bow is the way to go apparently lmao

i’m so pissed i missed possible loot bc i decided to go the way that looked like it had loot. FUCK

SECRET TUNNELLLLLLL! SECRET TUNNEL! THROUGH THE MOUNTAIN! haha

she’s so worried about joel🥺

me too tho i get it

the way that i’m naming every voice actor of these npc’s the whole time i’ve been playing this game💀

i’m like “oh my god yuri! laur! travis! nolan!” i do this with every game tho LMAO

the fucking music in the background is hauntingly beautiful

this lodge goes hard dude i wanna live here

ELLIE

FUUUUCK DAVID DUDE

EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWW

THE SOUND EFFECTS OF THE CUTTING BLEH

“it’s deer” BULLSHIT GUY I JUST SAW A MOTHERFUCKER CHOPPING UP A WHOLE P E R S O N

“you’re a fucking animal” *continues to eat like an animal*

this is something that i do think about when it comes to apocalypse situations like how fast would some people resort to… other forms of sustenance…

dude nolan killed it being creepy as fuck haha

how long until he snaps dude i’m scared. he’s too calm

“and you’re special” NOOOOOOOOOOooooooooOOOOOOOPE

YA’LL HAVE FUN

I’M NOT GONNA DO THAT HAHA

why tf is she letting him touch her hand bro i would’ve broken his goddamn fingers by now

wait she has to be acting so they’ll let her go nvm she’s clever lmao

OH MY GOD I SWEAR I DIDN’T KNOW SHE FUCKING BREAKS HIS FINGER

HOLY SHIT YEEES

“tell them that ellie is the little girl that broke your fucking finger.” OH MY GOD?? F E R A L

“how did you put it? hmm? tiny pieces?” IT’S THE LINE!! AH

also G R O S S

JOOOEEEELLLLLL

joel ur gonna rip those fuckin stitches man

woooaaah the controller light went from green to yellow? OHHHHH IT’S BASED ON MY HEALTH

why did that take me so long to notice? LMAOOOOO

the way that i’m walking slow as if that’ll put him through less pain💀

i take back what i said before about being able to hear him breathe bc this is so fucking sad hearing him grunting and struggling and shivering

i audibly shushed joel when he yelled for ellie like it was gonna do anything HAHA

having an injury in the cold fucking suuuuucks dude ur so sensitive to the weather

JESUS TAPDANCING CHRIST. even when joel is in extreme pain he’s taking not one, but TWO hostages. and they’re not overpowering him. jesus

HOLY FUCK JOEL. HE IS IN SO MUCH PAIN. AND JUST WAILIN ON THESE GUYS

jesus fucking christ

“focus right here.”

i- this is doing something to me🫢

ANYWAYYYY

PUTTING THE KNIFE IN HIS MOUTH AND MAKING HIM MARK THE MAP IN HIS OWN BLOOD IS C O L D AS HELL

“and it better be the same spot your buddy points to” OH MY GOD JOEL

“that’s alright. i believe him.”

i’m sittin here like 😳🫢😮

bro do not FUCK with joel miller goddamn

ellie you better wake the fuck up the terminator is coming to pick you up

oh shit oh fuck oh shit

YEA FUCK YOU DAVID LOOK AT HER ARM FUCKER

SLAAYYYYY ELLIE

oh this is a blizzard alright

sorry my midwesterner came out there for a sec

dude nolan is scary in this role he’s doin great

i’m waiting to hear joel absolutely fucking shit up in the distance

hearing ellie shiver :(

DUDE BURNING BUILDING BOSS FIGHT? slay

DAVID IS SO SCARY

JOOOOOEEEELLLLLL

i’m the one that will be fucking shit up? EXCELLENT👹

THERE’S LIKE 12 GUYS FOR ME TO HANDLE?? I HAD LIKE 5 or 6 FOR ELLIE TOTAL GODDAMN

ellie’s bag!!

when he walks into the butcher and sees what’s hanging then is like “i gotta find her. i gotta find her” in a slightly panicked tone? NO ONE TALK TO ME

oh shit indeed joel

ELLIE WAKE UUUUP I DON’T LIKE THIS ELLIE WAKE UUUUUUPPPP

i’m waiting for joel to come in and fuck shit up part 2 electric boogaloo

david is pathetic bro fighting a 14 yr old. watching her crawl for a weapon desperately, only to laugh and kick her when she gets close

holy fuck dude. no one talk to me. no one perceive me rn.

the first time he’s called her babygirl😭

oh my god. i’m fucking C R Y I N G rn

super traumatic things happen right before the seasons change i should know this by now

we’re in spring now oh boy

AHH THE OUTFITS!!! THE ONES THAT PEDRO AND BELLA WERE WEARING ON SET!!! AHHH

“let’s go kiddo” i- i need a minute after what just went down dude

i feel like i should stop now but i know i’m close to the ending

we’ve made it to utah!

“i’m gonna teach you how to play guitar” 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

ellie’s spacing out bc she’s scared :(

this is so crazy bc this literally looks like pedro and bella from behind

i love the fits that are goin on these might be my favorite so far

the rv :(

i’m literally crying just thinking about how full circle it is that joel lost his daughter, but has now gained a daughter. he tried so hard to fight it off. he even told her straight to her face that he’s not her father. now jump to him calling her babygirl and kiddo, and how they’re just chatting away about ellie’s dreams. how joel’s voice sounds warmer and softer, and so does ellie’s. i can’t fuckin do this bro

also not only the evolution from the beginning where he was like ugh a child🙄, but just from wyoming to now is so fucking wholesome. “i sure as hell ain’t your dad.” to now??? FUCK dude. i’m emotional

i’m not jazzed about being back in a city

if he calls her kiddo or babygirl one more time it will be my undoing

WAIT GIRAFFE SOON??? I FUCKIN HOPE SO

joel checking on her and not wanting to push her so he’s just like “it’s fine” so she doesn’t feel like she needs to be as talkative as she usually is🥲

my heart… HURTS bro

BZKSBSKDVSKSVDLWVDOEGSKSV THIS HURTS BRO HE WAS READY TO BOOST HER AND HE JUST SAW THAT SHE WAS STILL THERE AND SPACED OUT AGAIN AND I-😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I AM A GLASS CASE OF EMOTION RIGHT NOW

STOP HE GOT SO SCARED

GIRAFFE TIME???

“what in the sam hell?” ASDFGHKLBDKS

GIRAFFE TIME!!!!!🥳🥳🥳🕺🏻🕺🏻🕺🏻

THERE’S TWO???

THE MUSIC? STOP IT

THERE’S THREE?!!

“don’t scare it” “i won’t, i won’t” IN THE SOFTEST VOICE I- MMMMMMMMM

WHY AM I CRYING ABOUT 2 PEOPLE PETTING A GIRAFFE

WAIT I KNOW THIS SONG

VANISHING GRACE!

ellie instantly perked up. it’s like a father and daughter at the zoo🥹 she’s like “hurry up! come on!” I CANNOT TAKE THIS

EIGHT GIRAFFES???

is a heart to heart about to happen bc i can’t take it rn i’m a mess

“is it everything you were hopin’ for?” “it’s got it’s ups and downs. can’t deny the view though”😭

i hope the game knows that i will literally fucking stand here for eternity. and this is what joel and ellie are gonna do for the rest of their lives. giraffe watch. no more trauma. just giraffes bein dudes.

and this is all before the ending??? CURSE YOU NAUGHTY DOG

i don’t want to progress bc they’re both so content and peaceful rn. UGH i’m sorry ya’ll we have to continue. JOEL. ELLIE. I’M SORRY

oh god i wasn’t expecting a cutscene am i about to get my heart broken? again?

“we don’t have to do this” ONE LINE IN AND I’M ALREADY UUUGH

they don’t want to let go of each other… bc they need each other at this point.

“it can’t be for nothing” THERE IT IS

uh ooohhhhh joel’s feeling differently mefinks

i want to hug both of them so fucking tight dudebros. so fucking tight.

i think i am gonna stop here bc i am tired and in pain from this fucking chair haha

yea this one was super ultra mega long. i’m sorry. i just got a lot to say and analyze sometimes yknow?? lots of story this time! maybe that’s why it’s longer haha

i just know that i am literally never going to be the same after playing this game. i’m so fucking happy that i finally did.

we finish(?) tomorrow! and i’ll probably do a seperate post from the next recap about what i thought of the game as a whole, and oh boy is that gonna be long too haha

but yea i’m so fucking excited but also scared to finish this!! until tomorrow!!🤎

[bluecarelesswhisper]

TOP 100 FEMALE SOLO SINGERS OF THE '50S AND '60S

Patti Page - All My Love, The Tennessee Waltz, Mockin' Bird Hill, I Went to Your Wedding, The Doggie in the Window, Cross Over the Bridge, Allegheny Moon, Old Cape Cod; Hush, Hush, Sweet Charlotte

Connie Francis - Who's Sorry Now, My Happiness, Lipstick on Your Collar, Everybody's Somebody's Fool, My Heart Has a Mind of its Own, Where the Boys Are, Don't Break the Heart That Loves You

Brenda Lee - Sweet Nothin's, I'm Sorry, I Want to Be Wanted, Fool #1, Break it to Me Gently, All Alone Am I

Kay Starr - Wheel of Fortune, Side By Side, Changing Partners, If You Love Me (Really Love Me), Rock and Roll Waltz

Doris Day - A Guy is a Guy, Secret Love, If I Give My Heart to You; Whatever Will Be, Will Be (Que Sera, Sera); Everybody Loves a Lover

Dionne Warwick - Anyone Who Had a Heart, Walk on By, I Say a Little Prayer, (Theme from) Valley of the Dolls, I'll Never Fall in Love Again

Aretha Franklin - I Never Loved a Man (The Way I Love You), Respect, Baby I Love You, Chain of Fools, The House That Jack Built

Teresa Brewer - Music! Music! Music!, Till I Waltz Again With You, Ricochet, A Tear Fell, A Sweet Old Fashioned Girl

Jo Stafford - Shrimp Boats, You Belong to Me, Jambalaya, Keep it a Secret, Make Love to Me!

Rosemary Clooney - Come On-a My House, Half as Much, Botch-A-Me, Hey There, This Ole House

Joni James - Why Don't You Believe Me, Have You Heard, Your Cheatin' Heart; My Love, My Love; How Important Can it Be?

Petula Clark - Downtown, I Know a Place, My Love, This is My Song, Don't Sleep in the Subway

Dinah Washington - I Don't Hurt Anymore, What a Diff'rence a Day Makes, Unforgettable, This Bitter Earth

Mary Wells - The One Who Really Loves You, You Beat Me to the Punch, Two Lovers, My Guy

Georgia Gibbs - Kiss of Fire, Seven Lonely Days, Tweedle Dee, Dance With Me Henry (Wallflower)

Lesley Gore - It's My Party, Judy's Turn to Cry, She's a Fool, You Don't Own Me

Nancy Sinatra - These Boots Are Made For Walkin'; How Does That Grab You, Darlin'?; Sugar Town, Love Eyes

Sarah Vaughan - Make Yourself Comfortable, How Important Can it Be?, Whatever Lola Wants, Broken-Hearted Melody

Dusty Springfield - I Only Want to Be With You, Wishin' and Hopin', You Don't Have to Say You Love Me, Son-Of-A Preacher Man

Ruth Brown - Teardrops From My Eyes, 5-10-15 Hours, (Mama) He Treats Your Daughter Mean, Oh What a Dream

Kitty Wells - It Wasn't God Who Made Honky Tonk Angels, Makin' Believe, Searching (For Someone Like You), Heartbreak U.S.A.

Etta James - The Wallflower, All I Could Do Was Cry, At Last, Tell Mama

LaVern Baker - Tweedlee Dee, Play it Fair, Jim Dandy, I Cried a Tear

Gale Storm - I Hear You Knocking, Teen Age Prayer, Dark Moon

Dinah Shore - My Heart Cries For You, Sweet Violets, Chantz-Chantez

Jaye P. Morgan - That's All I Want From You, Danger! Heartbreak Ahead, The Longest Walk

Eydie Gorme - Mama, Teach Me to Dance; You Need Hands, Blame it on the Bossa Nova

Carla Thomas - Gee Whiz (Look at His Eyes), B-A-B-Y, I Like What You're Doing (To Me)

Patsy Cline - Walkin' After Midnight, I Fall to Pieces, Crazy

Peggy Lee - Lover, Fever, Is That All There Is

Dee Dee Sharp - Mashed Potato Time, Gravy (For My Mashed Potatoes), Ride!

Kitty Kallen - Little Things Mean a Lot, In the Chapel in the Moonlight, My Coloring Book

Annette - Tall Paul, O Dio Mio, Pineapple Princess

Cher - All I Really Want to Do, Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down), You Better Sit Down Kids

Barbra Streisand - People, He Touched Me, Second Hand Rose

Linda Scott - I've Told Every Little Star, Don't Bet Money Honey, I Don't Know Why

Connie Smith - Once a Day, Ain't Had No Lovin', The Hurtin's All Over

Barbara Lewis - Hello Stranger, Baby I'm Yours, Make Me Your Baby

Anita Bryant - Till There Was You, Paper Roses, In My Little Corner of the World

Skeeter Davis - My Last Date (With You), The End of the World, I Can't Stay Mad at You

Sue Thompson - Sad Movies (Make Me Cry), Norman, Paper Tiger

Della Reese - And That Reminds Me, Don't You Know, Not One Minute More

Loretta Lynn - Don't Come Home A-Drinkin' (With Lovin' on Your Mind), Fist City, Woman of the World (Leave My World Alone)

Betty Everett - You're No Good, The Shoop Shoop Song, There Comes a Time

Jackie DeShannon - What the World Needs Now is Love, Put a Little Love in Your Heart, Love Will Find a Way

Timi Yuro - Hurt, What's a Matter Baby, Make the World Go Away

Debbie Reynolds - Tammy, A Very Special Love, Am I That Easy to Forget

Gogi Grant - Suddenly There's a Valley, Who Are We, The Wayward Wind

Maxine Brown - All in My Mind, Funny, Oh No Not My Baby

Betty Johnson - I Dreamed, Little White Lies, The Little Blue Man

Jean Shepard - A Satisfied Mind, Beautiful Lies, Second Fiddle (To An Old Guitar)

Shirley Ellis - The Nitty Gitty, The Name Game, The Clapping Song

Little Eva - The Loco-Motion, Keep Your Hands Off My Baby, Let's Turkey Trot

Vera Lynn - Auf Wiederseh'n Sweetheart, Yours, If You Love Me (Really Love Me)

Eartha Kitt - C'est Si Bon, Santa Baby, Somebody Bad Stole De Wedding Bell

Lulu - To Sir With Love, Best of Both Worlds, Morning Dew

June Valli - Crying in the Chapel, I Understand, Apple Green

Connie Stevens - Sixteen Reasons, Why'd You Wanna Make Me Cry, Mr. Songwriter

Jane Morgan - Fascination, The Day the Rains Came, With Open Arms

Nancy Wilson - (You Don't Know) How Glad I Am, I Wanna Be With You; Face it Girl, it's Over

Esther Phillips - Release Me, And I Love Him, When a Woman Loves a Man

Vikki Carr - It Must Be Him, The Lesson, With Pen in Hand

Little Peggy March - I Will Follow Him, I Wish I Were a Princess; Hello Heartache, Goodbye Love

Mindy Carson - Candy and Cake, My Foolish Heart, Wake the Town and Tell the People

Sandy Posey - Born a Woman, Single Girl, I Take it Back

Bobbie Gentry - Ode to Billie Joe, Fancy

Brenda Holloway - Every Little Bit Hurts, When I'm Gone

Eileen Rodgers - Miracle of Love, Treasure of Your Love

Barbara Lynn - You'll Lose a Good Thing, Second Fiddle Girl

Dottie West - Here Comes My Baby, Would You Hold it Against Me

Baby Washington - That's How Heartaches Are Made, Only Those in Love

Kathy Linden - Billy; Goodbye Jimmy, Goodbye

Cathy Carr - Ivory Tower, First Anniversary

Fontella Bass - Rescue Me, Recovery

Barbara Mason - Yes, I'm Ready; Sad, Sad Girl

Marianne Faithfull - As Tears Go By, Summer Nights

Shelley Fabares - Johnny Angel, Johnny Loves Me

Wanda Jackson - Let's Have a Party, In the Middle of a Heartache

Tammy Wynette - D-I-V-O-R-C-E, Stand By Your Man

Mama Cass - Dream a Little Dream of Me, It's Getting Better

Faye Adams - Shake a Hand, Hurts Me to My Heart

Jill Corey - I Love My Baby, Love Me to Pieces

Dodie Stevens - Pink Shoe Laces, No

Bettye Swann - Make Me Yours, Don't Touch Me

Jan Howard - Evil on Your Mind, Bad Seed

Nina Simone - I Loves You, Porgy; Ain't Got No; I Got Life

Norma Jean - Go Cat Go, I Wouldn't Buy a Used Car From Him

Miss Toni Fisher - The Big Hurt, West of the Wall

Damita Jo - I'll Be There, If You Go Away

Patty Duke - Don't Just Stand There, Say Something Funny

Bonnie Guitar - Dark Moon, Mister Fire Eyes

Gloria Lynne - I Wish You Love, Watermelon Man

Jody Miller - Queen of the House, Home of the Brave

Gisele MacKenzie - Hard to Get, The Star You Wished Upon Last Night

Betty Madigan - Joey, Dance Everyone Dance

Ketty Lester - Love Letters, But Not For Me

Barbara George - I Know (You Don't Love Me No More), You Talk About Love

Joanie Sommers - One Boy, Johnny Get Angry

Irma Thomas - Don't Mess With My Man, Wish Someone Would Care

Diane Renay - Navy Blue, Kiss Me Sailor

[isthisthingeven0n]

broken hearts heal : s.r

you return to the bau after two years alongside emily for an unsolved case having resurfaced, but there is still something lingering between you and spencer, even after all this time. (2k) 

so originally this was kinda inspired by the song ‘lookalike’ by conan gray because heartbreak and all, but it ended up as this beauty. i hope you like it!

m y  e t s y  s h o p

also pls don’t steal my work or share it without crediting, it takes a lot of time and effort to write these!

“So, when was the last time you saw him?” Emily asks as you sit quietly beside her in the passenger seat, watching the familiar scenes of your old drive to the Bureau.

Tearing your eyes from the windowless buildings and fencing, you quickly clear your throat knowing the answer without having to think. “The night before I left the states.” You answer quietly, even though it’s been two years, the thought of seeing him again worries you.

“It’ll be fine, Y/n.” Emily rests her hand on yours, squeezing it lightly. “They’re our friends, and based on how much we’ve heard from Penelope, they clearly miss us too.” Emily chuckles as she brakes softly at the gates, showing her ID as do you.

Watching the gates open, you can clearly remember the day you left. You drove out of the parking lot for the last time, Spencer hovering by the parking lot entrance as you forced yourself to not look back. And you didn’t, breaking Spencer’s heart in return.

“Yeah, I know.” You breathe out a shaky sigh, rubbing your hands over your trousers. “Two years is a long time to be gone, you know.” Your comment, causing Emily to laugh for a moment.

“No kidding.” She mutters as she climbs out from the car as you both walk towards the entrance to the building and press the button to the BAU like you’d never been gone.

*

“There’s no way we’re going to be able to piece this all together.” Morgan huffs as he and Spencer stand over all of the evidence they found three years ago when the case first began.

JJ walks in, interrupting Spencer’s deep thoughts as his eyes scan over the photos, various reports and their original profile of the unsub. “Hotch thought it’d be best to get in some extra help on the case,” JJ states and Spencer’s ears perk up. “so, I made some calls and well,”

“Emily, Y/n!” Penelope sings happily as you walk out from the elevator, not even making it into the bullpen before you’re engulfed in a tight hug.

Spencer’s body tenses upon hearing Garcia. You’re here. In Quantico, in the bureau, in the United States.

JJ and Morgan exchange a knowing look as she steps out, leaving Spencer a moment with Morgan. “It’ll be fine, pretty boy,” Morgan tells Spencer who snaps from his daze. “It’s just Emily and Y/n.”

“I know,” Spencer mumbles, but it’s not just that, it’s never been just that.

“If it isn’t my favourite Mother and Agent, JJ.” You chuckle, a sound Spencer has longed to hear since you left as he steps out from the conference room, his hands in his pockets like a shy teenager as you and Emily greet everyone.

Emily is the first to catch Spencer’s gaze, the tiredness in his eyes as prominent as ever. But that isn’t what caught Emily’s eyes in the first place, it’s the lovesick look written across his face as you stand with your back turned to him, oblivious to his presence.

“Hey, Spencer,” Emily speaks up, causing your voice to falter as JJ and Morgan both glance over your shoulder as you pause. “how have you been?”

“Good.” Spencer forces a small smile to Emily. “How’s London?”

Shrugging her shoulders, Emily chuckles. “Cold, pretty damp most of the time, but it’s good to have an old friend with me.” She motions to you, stepping aside as you turn around to face Spencer for the first time since that rainy day two years ago.

Locking eyes with Spencer’s, you can see so many changes in him as you subconsciously scan over his face. He’s looking more sleep deprived, but those crows feet around his eyes make your heart melt. His hair’s longer than you remembered it being, his curls bouncing across his forehead as a smile ghosts his lips.

“Hey, Y/n.” Spencer is the first to speak up, and for a moment you forget the team is around you as Emily motions for them to all move into the conference room, giving you both a moment in private.

“Hi Spence.” Your voice is soft, delicate even and Spencer tries his best to remain composed.

He wants to tell you that he’s missed your voice, he’s missed the evenings you would spend together outside of work. He wishes he could take it all back, tell you the truth instead of a misconstrued lie to help you when in fact all it did was hurt you.

“It’s kinda strange, being back.” You add, looking around as you keep your hands hidden in your pockets, something you did when you were uncomfortable as Spencer remembered, there’s not a detail about you he could ever forget. “Not much has changed, clearly.” A forced laugh leaves your lips as you look back at Spencer.

“They replaced the filing cabinets in the storage room, and Garcia got a few new monitors last year.” Spencer explains, finishing with a curt nod as silence looms over you both like a thick fog.

“God it’s painful to watch.” Emily seethes from inside the conference room as JJ stands beside her, her arms crossed over her chest. “They used to be so happy together.”

JJ sighs as Spencer rolls on the balls of his feet. “Did Y/n ever tell you about what happened the day she left?”

Emily shakes her head. “Do you?”

“Like Spence would tell anyone.” JJ scoffs lightly, turning around as Hotch calls them both before stepping out, saving you both from anymore attempted interactions outside of the case.

*

You had been working on the case for almost a week with no new leads despite three bodies having surfaced from the unsub. It was draining and infuriating that you were no closer now than you were three years ago.

“Come on, what is different, why has he come back after three years?” You think aloud, looking around the room as all eyes remain cast down, except Spencer’s.

“Clearly there’s been a trigger, a special date or anniversary to the unsub. We know he killed Victoria Ellis on the ninth of June,” Spencer states, but you sigh quietly.

“It doesn’t match up, Spencer.” You cut him off abruptly, catching the rest of the team off guard, Spencer included as he closes his mouth, his heart sinking as you mutter an apology.

“Okay, Prentiss, you and Y/L/N go to the newest crime scene, Reid and Rossi visit Killian Harron's family, see if they know anything about a new person in his life. The rest of us will stay here, whilst Garcia works through old reports when the case first started.” Hotch announces, and you cannot stand up fast enough and exit the room.

As you stand by the elevator, Emily walks out. “What was that about?” She asks, holding her arms up as you roll your eyes. “Don’t start acting like a kid, Y/n. It’s not a good look on you.”

“I didn’t mean to snap at him.” You admit as the doors to the elevator open and you both walk in. “It’s just, whenever I look at him all I can think about are his last words to me.”

Emily pats your shoulder as a weak smile forms on your lips. “Why haven’t you ever told me about what happened that night?” Emily questions quietly as the metal doors slide open, and you step forward, shrugging her hand off your shoulder. 

“Because it still hurts to think about it.” You comment, exiting the bureau and opening the door to the SUV, slamming it shut.

*

After almost a month, you find him. You found the unsub after almost sixteen murders across the country, each more brutal and violent than the last over the course of three years, it was over. 

Sitting in the bullpen you carried on writing the last of your paperwork, knowing you were cutting it fine before you had to go to the airport.

“Are you sure you can’t stay just another day?” Penelope pleads as she stands by your side, her hands bound together.

A light laugh leaves your lips as you close the last of your files. “I wish we could Pen, but I’ve got to get home.”

Home. The word pangs through Spencer, causing his heart to ache as you’ve moved on, moved elsewhere to a new place with a new job, somewhere he isn’t.

“I’ll call you as soon as I land though.” You tell her, bringing her into a tight hug.

“Oh fine, and tell Grant I said hi.” Penelope adds as you finish saying your goodbyes to the rest of the team, leaving Spencer until last.

Spencer rises to his feet as he walks towards you. “Mind if I walk you out?” He asks quietly.

“Sure.” You nod, walking alongside him as you wave to the rest of the team, leaving Emily to finish her goodbyes.

Once out of sight, Emily sighs heavily. “God, she’s going to break his heart.” She admits, and Penelope nods in agreement as a sad smile forms on her lips, knowing when their resident genius returns, he will never be the same.

Walking slowly with Spencer, you reach the spot where you said your last goodbye, convinced you’d never see him again. Yet, here you are, doing it all over.

“Thanks for walking me out, Spence.” You tell him quietly as you bury your hands in your jumper, a cold chill in the air as the breeze picks up, blowing Spencer’s curls to one side.

“I just wanted to say this in private, Y/n.” Spencer smiles sweetly to you, his hand reaching out as he brushes your hair out of your face, watching your eyes close at his warm touch. “What I said that night, I’m sorry. I’ll never forgive myself for that, for letting you leave and not trying to make amends.” Spencer explains, but you shake your head.

His hand remains on your cheek, and you lift your hand up, resting it on top of his as you hold back tears. “Spence, you don’t have to, it’s okay.” You try to reassure him, but Spencer remains adamant, he has to tell you this.

“Y/n, I, I’ll always love you. I always have done and I always will. I, I was such an idiot for not saying it sooner. I know the feeling of falling in love is just a chemical mix of norepinephrine, dopamine and phenylethylamine, but with you, I don’t care!” He gleefully laughs as a tear slips from your eyes, burying themselves inside his palm.

“Spence, please,” You quietly cry.

“Just please, Y/n. Don’t leave me again. I want to be selfish for just once in my life. I, I’ll move to London just, please,” His voice becomes quieter as your other hand reaches up and that’s when his eyes lock on it, the small diamond ring.

“I’m sorry, Spence.” You whisper as his hand drops from your cheek, the cold air now attacking the remainder of the warmth on your skin, tearing the soft moment away before you can savour it. “It’s too late.” You step away as Spencer stares in disbelief, his lips parting, but no words follow. “You’ll always have a special place in my heart, Spencer, but I couldn’t wait forever.”

“I understand,” Spencer whispers as he tucks his hair behind his ear, trying to distract himself to remain composed in front of you. “I hope you’re happy with him, Y/n, truly.” He tries to hide the pain in his tone, but to you, it’s never been more obvious.

“Thank you, Spencer.” You tell him as you wipe your eyes. “I know you’ll find someone one day, and they’re out there for you, I promise.” You extend your hand in front of his, hoping he’d at least shake your hand after all this time.

But Spencer pats your hand away, bringing you into a tight hug as tears fall down his cheeks whilst your back is turned, but you can hear how fast his heart is beating. “Goodbye, Y/n.” Spencer breathes out into your hair before pulling away.

“Goodbye, Spence.” You chuckle as a watery smile lines your lips as you walk away towards the car, just like you did two years ago.

Opening the car door, you release a quiet sob as Emily brings you into a tight hug. “It’s okay, Y/n.” Emily soothes you as you sit upright. “You finally got the goodbye you both deserved.” She reminds you as she starts the car up.

“Yeah,” You nod in response as you glance through the side mirror, seeing Spencer still stood there as he wipes his eyes before you disappear out of sight once again, knowing things will never be the same. “that’s what hurts the most.” You force yourself not to look back, and as a result breaking Spencer’s heart completely for the last time. 

“The saddest thing about love is that not only that it cannot last forever, but that heartbreak is soon forgotten.” - William Faulkner. 

[apenapaperandadoofus]

Can you make a list on who you think is the most to least reliable of the RFA (+ Minor Trio if you want!) when it comes to pets 👀

gasp you know what yes (I've been wanting to make some lists for a while -maybe least to most bottom of each of the RFA characters LMAO-)

MysMe characters least to most reliable with a pet and what pet would they have:

11. Rika

LMFAO bet ya didn't expect that did ya!? Nah you probably did, anyway the reason why she's the least reliable for a pet it's kinda obvious, first of all, she would refuse to get her pet treatment when it almost turns blind and ma'am? Please help your dog???

Also if at any time the pet dies she would start another cult so let's not risk it with her. Instead of an animal maybe give her a rock instead pfttt (actually wait-no she'd probably throw it at our poor mint coloured hair boy just give her a dog plushy it smth she can't be trusted with alive things)

10. Saeyoung

You may be asking me, Amanda, why, Saeyoung absolutely loves cats he'd be a cool cat dad, and yes, you're right. But you also don't understand that this man's love for cats goes SO far that he will actually cause chaos all around him. He'd give the cat SO many treats, not only that, but he'd also cuddle them, and that's nice tight? Wrong. This man will try to stretch the cat, grab it and twirl it around, reenact the lion king and do the 'Simba' bit and everything. Not only that he'd completely use it to prank Zen and everyone else, overall, he'd be a great pet owner but it'd be too much chaos so let's just stick with loving cats from afar.

Also I feel like he'd get a snake for some reason, and he'd dress them up in like a fancy bowtie a hat, or an iguana or chameleon y'know? He'd go for the amphibian type :o

9. Ray

I love our boy, I really do, but honestly how do you expect him to take care of a dog if he can't take care of himself. 😢

Actually scratch that, if he had a dog he would definitely love it and spoil it, and we live for that but also:

honey focus on yourself too we don't want you to D I E

Maybe give him a hamster or smth, while he's hacking away and watching MC in their room the hamster will be spinning on it's wheel super happy

Or he can have some cute fishes 🐟🐠

And like his brother, because great minds think alike, maybe a chameleon. He'd be pretty scared of them at first but he found one under some flowers and decided to rescue it, and now he sort of ended up adopting it :D

Although I find it pretty unlikely that he'll get a pet, he's more into flowers anyway

(OH WAIT WHAT ABOUT BEES? YA LIKE JAZZ -im sorry pft but now I need to see Ray in like those bee farmer dress things lmao)

8. Zen

I could see him as the pet owner that takes their dogs on walks and such, but honestly, if he's allergic to cats he's probably allergic to other animals too, at least some with a lot of hair! Although I feel like he'd get one of those big dogs and he'd go on runs with it all the time. The dog would be like the ones that are mostly thought of as super dangerous or aggressive but it turns out they're a sweetheart. Either that or a poodle 🐩💀 (but like I said, he's probably allergic to animals with lots of hair.)

HOW ABOUT A PARROT? ZEN COULD TOTALLY PRACTICE HIS LINES AND SONGS WITH THE PARROT AJDNFBFB

7. Jihyun

Jihyun would be pretty good as a pet owner but honestly he'd be super nervous at everything at first. Welcome to the Jihyun apologizing to his pet show akdjdn. But would we trust him with a pet? He wasn't really able to take care of two teenage boys -although it was mostly because he was in a toxic relationship 💀

When he has his sight problems he could totally get those helper dogs? (Forgot what they're called I'm sorry T_T)

He'd probably get a more chill pet tho, maybe a cat (he probably likes them a lot too! Also they're pretty calming.) So he could have like the guide dog and a small kitty too!

6. Jaehee

She'd be an awesome pet mom lol. I don't think she'd get a cat after being traumatized from pet-sitting Elizabeth. Maybe she could get like a turtle 🐢

Or maybe a rat to reenact Ratatouille lmaoo

She wouldn't get big pets unless the MC wanted to adopt something (and if they're a couple, we all know what people who want kids but can't or just aren't able to adopt at the moment, do, they get DOGS AND CATS!!!)

So honestly she'd start understanding why Jumin pampers Elly so much, since your dogs basically your child now PFTTT

Maybe a bunny too? I could see her working with the bunny on her head lmao and that's adorable

Omg imagine her with a SNAKE, HOW BADASS WOULD THAT BE???

5. Suit Saeran

You may be wondering once again, WHAT AND WHY

Let me explain.

Suit would dffinetly get those scary and big dogs that have spiky collars and everything, and he'd probably call him something like Killer or Skull Destroyer, or maybe Blade lmao

And we all know he'd die for his dog. It's the only one he can trust ajdhdbdbd

He'd be like the bad boys that walk around with their dog everywhere growling at people (not just the dog, the two of them)

And "Spike" would be so well taken care of. Believers have to start doing draws to see who feeds the monster dog that always bites them PFTTT

The dog would also dffinetly know how to fight. It'd be cute if the only person he likes appart from Saeran tho is MC hehe

AND you cannot change my mind in this, ever since Saeran got "Dark Knight" (I'm experimenting with the dog names pfft) he's shown him a picture of Saeyoung and taught him to absolutely hate his guts, so Seven, buddy, maybe don't get to close to them lol

AND the backstory for this dog is that Saeran found him under some bushes, hurt, and the dog reminded him of when he was younger, so he took him in and that's how the doggie came to be :3

3. GE Saeran

Idk, he'd also get the normal-ish animals, like a bunny or a cat (he'd like how calming they are.)

He'd be awesome with animals too!

Also uhm, someone please draw him as a farmer AJDHDHD lmaoo that's the first thing that came to mind 😂

He'd be the person that likes animals but like....other people's animals? He'd love to see Elizabeth and such, but he wouldn't really want to have one (unless MC wanted to of course.) It's not that he doesn't like them, it's mostly because he feels more comfortable with other people's pets ajdjdbd

Also he doesn't want them to ruin the garden oop

3. In a tie with Saeran, Yoosung

I forgot about him and didn't want to change the numbers lmao

Yoosung is a vet, c'mon he knows how to deal with animals!

At first he'd be so freaking nervous and would be just like a helicopter parent, making sure the doggie is alright and such, but then he gets the hang of it and he's perfect.

We all know we got a bunny with him too in his GE :D so maybe a dog and a bunny! He'd have more than one pet I'll tell ya that.

2. Jumin

Listen he's the king alright? He pampers his cat SO much, and you can just TELL how much he loves Elly. We all stan a man that loves animals.

He'd probably get some exotic pets too, maybe a few horses and birds that are really exotic or something

But can you imagine him with like....a tiger PFT

He'd be like: omg this is a cat but bigger let me have one

It'd be like Sebastian from Black Butler lol

He'd also be up to a dog, it'd take a bit of convincing but if MC wants one then he'd snap his fingers and get them one immediately (I love this man he's so ADORABLE) and then they'd have two children and Zen wouldn't have to worry about just Elizabeth

1. Vanderwood

Yes! The one! The only!

He's the only one appart from Jaehee that has more than one braincell PFTTTTT

He'd have a pretty big and scary dog that would've an absolute sweetheart when you get to know them. Everyone at first is scared but the dog just wants to sleep and eat, that's all.

Vanderwood is super responsible, I mean after Saeyoung I'm sure a dog would be nothing. He'd also compare Seven to his dog lol "Not even Capitan America is that dirty!"

"you named your dog Capitan America...?"

"shut the hell up or I'm tasing you."

His dog would spend all day sleeping. Sometimes Vanderwood will take him on walks, and they really enjoy that time together.

Vanderwood romance route? Uh, no he's far too in love with his dog to be doing anything else PFT

And you cannot once again change my mind on this:

He talks to his dog when he's alone.

He will tell him about his day as he cooks or does the laundry. He'd be in an apron making some dinner and be all like:

"Ugh, today I had to take care of that no-good for nothing guy again. It's incredible how messy his house can get in just a matter of hours! Not only that, he wasn't eating properly again, that idiot. I had to practically drag him out of his chair and make him eat some food. Not that I'm worried. It'd just be a hassle to have to find another hacker as good as him. Seriously that guy...."

And the dog would be like excuse me do I look like your therapist please just give me food lolol

[turnthepage11]

Hi catch me spiraling because I'm thinking about Perverted but in the Ellie universe.

Some highlights:

- The second Liv is arrested, Elliot goes straight for Ellie because Tucker called CPS because where else is she going to go? Both sets of grandparents are dead, she has no aunts or uncles, really SVU is not her blood family so CPS has to be called. (And Elliot never tells Liv that Tucker did that. Makes it sound like he just picked up Ellie and took her home with him because that's who Ellie feels most safe with.)

- And he calls Kathy on the way to Ellie's school and just says "Liv's been arrested for murder." And she's flabbergasted because Liv? His Liv? And then she remembers, Ellie and he tells her he's picking her up from school, can she stay with her today while he straightens this all out? And then Kathy goes ballistic. "Does this Tucker even know what he's talking about? This is Olivia. And he really decided to lock her up knowing she has a child at home?! He couldn't ask her child to confirm her whereabouts??" And she realizes then why he's going to get Ellie because oh my God they called Child Protective Services didn't they? And like fuck either of them are letting that happen to Eleanor Louise Benson, their sensitive little spitfire, they'll get charged with kidnapping first.

- And Elliot thanks every God and Saint there is because Liv had put him on Ellie's pick up list after a mishap when Ellie was younger and Liv couldn't go get her from school that ended with him having to pull her as a cop and not just Uncle Elliot and it turned into a mess.

- Because it allows him to get Ellie quickly and without any fuss, and Ellie is both confused and excited because Uncle Elliot never comes and gets her during the school day, and most of the time it's bad but sometimes it's good so she's hopeful.

- And she's trying to chatter but Elliot's rushing her to the car because he doesn't know how much of a lead he has on CPS, if Tucker called them the second he arrested Liv or if he didn't do it until she was at Rikers. And right as he's pulling away, the CPS car pulls up to the school and goddamn it he's in such deep shit.

- When he gets home, Kathy comes and gets Ellie, who now knows that her mom is in trouble and she's in jail and she can't stop crying because she's been sick all week, she's hasn't even left the house why do they think she hurt someone?

- And when Elliot realizes that Liv can get out on bail, Kathy is the one to tell him to put the house up for Liv's bail. Because she knows that she didn't do it, seeing Ellie more than confirms what she had already believed and Ellie hasn't stopped crying since she's been at their house.

- CPS shows up at the precinct because they know that Elliot pulled Ellie from school and Cragen is watching wearily behind him because what the fuck has the other disaster twin done now?? And they tell him he's in trouble for pulling Ellie out of the school building until suddenly Elliot remembers Liv had filled out paperwork to designate him as Ellie's guardian a few years back should anything ever happen to her. And god bless that woman for keeping that paperwork in her desk because she knew she'd lose it at home and he digs for it in her desk and luckily it's not buried in a file folder and he thrusts it at the CPS worker and they look it over and accept it and tell him that they'll be checking in on the situation and Elliot lets out a breath as one fire has been put out and Cragen is giving him that look and Elliot just is exasperated.

- "What, was I supposed to tell her no?" And Cragen just looks up at the ceiling in a "dear sweet God" look and just waves his hand at him.

- "I'm not even dealing with that now, go find out if Liv is finally ready to be let out of Rikers." And he hears Rebecca Hendrix's recommendation screaming in his head as Elliot walks out of the squad room.

- And Ellie calls Kathy "Auntie Kay" instead of Miss Kathy which is a big deal because Kathy knows that Aunt/Uncle status is reserved for the squad and she's just a moon that makes it's occasional appearance in Ellie's universe but Ellie trusts her enough to call her "Auntie" and her heart swells.

- Luckily Ellie falls asleep after playing with baby Eli because it distracts her from her mother and Elliot just takes Liv home because they all decide to just leave Ellie there, things are still too up in the air and they don't want to disrupt her if she's asleep.

- And then Harrison is there and Liv thanks the universe for the way the day has played out because Ellie has managed to miss all the traumatizing things.

[deerixiie]

hii!!! how are you? i saw you were kinda new to the haikyuu writing scene, so i thought i'd introduce myself and request something! i'm ellie! my favorite characters are goshiki, kenma, and tendou. also a simp4tsukki! could you do bokuto and ushijima with a female s/I that has a condition where they always have period cramps, so they never really have the traditional "once a month" period. and the boys ask her about it one day, and she's just like "oh, it's just all the time" and their reaction?

s/o who always experiences cramps - headcanons

warnings: none

pairings: bokuto x fem!reader, ushijima x fem!reader

a/n: hi ellie, thank you for requesting! i have no idea if a condition where you always experience cramps but still keep a regular cycle exists, and i’m sorry if i offend anyone with a condition like this! if i messed up with the request i can rewrite it!

it’s kind of ironic how as I'm posting this I'm dealing with some cramps too ;-; 

BOKUTO

bokuto noticed while you were walking to school with him that you seemed to be in pain by the arm clenched around your waist

your arm was always there, but he saw the way your face was clenched and realized that something was wrong.

“Baby?” He totally does the head tilt thing all owls do, “Are you okay?” 

“Huh?” You turn to him and wave him off with a smile. “Oh, yeah, it’s just period cramps.”

“Wha? But didn’t you have them last week?”

you give him a small smile. “I.. get them all the time, Bo. It’s a condition.”

cue bokuto freaking out 

“SO YOU MEAN YOU’RE IN PAIN ALL THE TIME???”

it takes you a lot of reassuring to calm him down, but he’s in emo mode for the rest of the day 

(he cares about you so much, he doesn’t like seeing you hurt and hearing that you were always in some sort of pain crushed him)

when akaashi confronts him during practice, he says that you had cramps and he was sad because he couldn’t do anything about it

yukie and kaori overhead and they tell him that there are things that could soothe the pain

he dragged akaashi, kaori, and yukie to the convenience store after practice and begged them to point out the right things (akaashi was there for emotional support)

you were really surprised to see the armload of things he brought to you the next morning. “Aww, babe, you really didn’t have to 🥺”

he definitely gives you extra hugs and cuddles whenever you look like you’re in pain in the future

USHIJIMA

you were watching one of his practices when the cramps started getting really bad. You didn’t want to just leave, so you take some ibuprofen 

ushijima looks over to you at that exact moment (it’s like he has some intuition smh) and he is visibly confused

you see him looking at you and you just flash him the label, so he knows you’re taking some ibuprofen. 

he already knows you take ibuprofen for cramps, but he’s confused since you weren’t supposed to get your period yet

the next opportunity he gets you can basically bet he’s walking over to you. “Why are you taking ibuprofen now?”

you give him a sheepish smile. “I have a condition where I always get cramps.”

ushijima is definitely asking you all these blunt questions about it. “What's the condition called?” “Is there treatment for it?” “Do you have prescriptions?” 

to anyone else, it looks like he’s just being harsh, but he’s actually really concerned about you (he just doesn’t show it that well)

as soon as he gets back to his dorm he does a ton of research on treatment. The next day at school he gives you this full-blown printed list with treatment and other things

you were confused at first, but then you saw what was on the list and your heart m e l t e d. your eyes might’ve started watering a little bit ngl “Toshi, did you really do this all for me?”

he’s a big softie, he’s always keeping an eye out for you just in case you do experience really bad cramps

masterlist

[whump-tr0pes]

Honor Bound 5 - 5

This is a series. Start here, continued from here.

This is a sequel to Honor Bound, Honor Bound 2, Honor Bound 3, Honor Bound 4, and the prequel Vera.

AO3

Ok @eatyourdamnpears, @who-needs-a-life-anyways, and @ashintheairlikesnow, there was a vote for Finn angst vs. Gavin angst, and Finn angst won. However comma. In an unprecedented turn of events, the muse provided for me fluff instead.

Content warning: permanent injury, chronic pain, brief description of surgery, body image issues with scars, implied captivity

~

At Finn’s side, Isaac jumped as if he’d been shocked. “Y-yeah,” he mumbled, still staring at Sam. “Sure.” He stood and looked around numbly, as if he’d already forgotten what Gray had asked him to do.

Finn turned their attention back to Sam. They seemed to be doing better now. There was a faint sheen of sweat on their face, and they still clutched at their wrist, but their breathing was slowing down, easing, and their tears were drying on their cheeks. Finn bit their lip as they reached up and wiped Sam’s tears away with their thumbs.

Sam looked behind Finn forlornly as Isaac began to pick up the biggest shards of the shattered bowl. “I guess I won’t be able to get up until that’s clean,” they murmured.

“Yeah,” Finn said distantly. “Probably a good idea to wait until it’s clean, yeah.”

“So I guess…” Sam sniffed. “I guess we should… talk it about it now.” They looked down at their lap.

Finn groaned and moved to Sam’s side, sitting down and leaning back against the cabinets beside them. Whipped cream dried on the bottoms of Finn’s shoes. “We don’t have to, Sam,” they said softly. “We don’t… e-ever have to talk about it, if you, um… don’t…” They trailed off and trembled as a wave of guilt washed over them. They buried their face in their hands.

Sam was silent for a long time. The drying whipped cream under Isaac’s shoes make a tacky sound as he criss-crossed the kitchen picking up pieces of the bowl that seemed to lay in every corner.

“Finn?” Sam said softly. Finn raised their head to look at them. Fresh tears stained their cheeks. “I’m… I’m s-sorry.”

“Don’t be, Sam,” Finn said heavily. Edrissa and Zachariah were busy wiping up the whipped cream with towels. Gavin had maneuvered past the mess and into the living room. Finn could hear a bucket being filled with water in the laundry room. “I… understand.”

“But—” Sam bit their lip. “I didn’t want you to find out… like this. I was hoping you’d never have to, um, f-find out at all. I thought… I thought maybe…”

Finn dragged their shoulders up around their ears. “It still might get better, I guess,” they croaked. “If… if it’s caused by, um, by inflammation, or, or s-something like that, then once the, ah, swelling goes down, you might… might get…” Finn looked down at their hands. “I don’t… think…”

“It wasn’t your fault,” Sam whispered.

Finn’s hands slowly curled into fists. “You don’t, um… d-don’t know that, Sam. I could have… while I was, um, fixing you up, I found a nerve that was in the way… I was careful, I was—” Their voice twisted. Their cleared their throat, swallowed against the hot lump there. “I was so fucking careful. I thought… I stayed clear of it. I thought I…” They let their head fall back against the cabinets with a thump. “I thought I did it right,” they whispered.

“You did,” Sam said weakly. “I’m… I’m p-pretty sure…” They cleared their throat. “I’m pretty sure the nerve was, um… already messed up. By the bullet.”

Finn’s head snapped forward, and they stared at Sam. “What… do you mean?”

“Um…” Sam’s throat worked, and they swallowed noisily. “I… th-think I remember… even before the surgery, I…” They looked down at their right hand. “It… hurt. In my hand, and right here…” They drew their pointer finger across the inside of their forearm. “All the way up to here.” They gently ran their finger over the inside of their arm, all the way up to the sleeve of their t-shirt. “I… think I remember… feeling like something was wrong.”

Finn stared at Sam. Their heart squeezed painfully in their chest, hope washing through them, flushing the bitter shame out of their veins. “Sam… are you… You’re not just saying that because—”

“No,” Sam said, and met Finn’s eyes. “I’m not.”

Finn slumped back against the cabinets. “Then… then it’s not…” They wet their lips. “Then it’s not… my… fault?”

Edrissa drew near, wiping the floor clean of whipped cream. Sam glanced at her for a moment before they returned their gaze to Finn. “No,” they rasped. “It’s not your fault.”

Finn’s breath rushed out from between their lips, leaving their chest aching. “O-oh,” they murmured. Tears burned in their eyes.

“You did a good job, Finn,” Sam said softly.

“Oh,” Finn said again. They jerked the collar of their shirt up and wiped their eyes. “Oh.” When they dropped their shirt again, Isaac stood over them both.

“Um…” Isaac bit his lip. “We’re about done, Gray just needs to, um, to mop.” Isaac glanced behind him just as Gray walked back into the kitchen carrying a bucket of steaming water and a mop. The smell of lemon washed over Finn, drowning out the sweet smell of the whipped cream.

“Yeah,” Finn mumbled. They pushed themself to their feet. They glanced up to see Ellis standing at the counter, looking in from the living room. Their hands were locked on the counter and their gaze was concerned and fixed on Sam. Gavin stood beside them, looking stricken. Ellis didn’t even seem to notice him.

Finn blinked and reached down for Sam. Sam took their hand, and Finn pulled Sam to their feet. Sam wobbled, holding their injured foot up, and looked across the expanse of the kitchen floor towards the hallway to the bedrooms.

“I… can, can hop, but I’ll get the floor all whipped-cream-y,” Sam said, glancing at the foot they were balanced on. Whipped cream clung to the sides of their foot.

“I can carry you,” Isaac said at Finn’s shoulder. His voice was pitched low, his gaze moving over Sam’s clothes. Sam chewed their lip and nodded once.

Finn suddenly burst out laughing as they realized Sam was covered in whipped cream from head to toe. They bent forward at the waist, cackling and gasping for air. “Oh my… how did you three even… manage to make this mess?” they wheezed, holding their side. “How… holy shit?”

“We won, though,” Edrissa said quietly, standing by Zachariah by the sink, scrubbing the bottom of her foot with a wet towel.

“Yeah, because there were two of you!” Sam cried, scandalized, their eyes wide in a look of mock hurt. “It wasn’t fair!”

“You can discuss the legality of their win once the kitchen is all cleaned up,” Gray said with a smile, dipping the mop into the bucket of steaming water and whatever it was that smelled like lemon. They wrung out the mop and let it fall to the floor with a smack.

“And once I’m cleaned up, too,” Sam said. They wiped at their face, where a streak of whipped cream was now drying. “I need a shower. Holy crap.”

Gray laid a towel down on a clean patch of floor at the doorway between the kitchen and the living room. “Here, Isaac,” they said. “Take off your shoes here as you take them to the bathroom. Finn, you need to wipe your feet there, too. Unless you’d like to wipe down the cabinets.”

Finn blinked and realized there were spatters of whipped cream on the cabinets closest to where the bowl had fallen. “Damn,” they breathed. “Sure, I’ll help with the cabinets.”

Finn turned as the front door opened and watched Tori and Vera step into the house.

Tori froze as she saw everyone standing in the kitchen, covered in various degrees with whipped cream. Vera was right behind her carrying two canvas bags. She glanced at Tori and followed her gaze into the kitchen. Her eyebrows slowly pulled together.

“Uh… what’d I miss?”

“Edrissa and Zachariah cheated,” Sam grumbled good-naturedly.

“She jumped on my back,” Zachariah said, his gaze flicking between Sam and Edrissa. “As you’ll recall, I wanted no part on this. I only wanted to save myself.” He pressed his lips together, but a smile still pulled at the corners of his mouth. “I am merely a casualty of war.”

“Did you use up all the whipped cream?” Tori gasped. “What… no!”

“I told Gray I would make more!” Edrissa protested.

“We leave for two hours, and the whole house goes to shit,” Vera muttered as she set the bags on the floor and bent down to tug off her shoes.

“What’d you bring us?” Ellis said as they made their way from the counter back to the couch. Gavin remained at the counter, glancing at Sam every now and then, but mostly keeping his gaze down. Ellis shrugged. “I hope you had more luck than Finn did.”

Finn’s heart twinged. Maybe Crayton could get the nausea meds sooner. I wonder if I should call their general store…?

“Made some inquiries in Burmingham,” Vera said as she bent to pick up the bags. “They didn’t get any apples this week, which makes them think there was a disturbance in the southwest supply lines. No news yet about who’s taking over the western sector.” She walked over to the kitchen and stopped at the towel Gray had laid down in the walkway from the living room. “Do I need a password?” she said sardonically, and cocked an eyebrow at Gray.

Gray snorted. “The password is, ‘I don’t want my socks getting sticky.’ I’ll take the bags.” They leaned the mop against the counter and took the bags from Vera’s hands. They set them on the counter and picked up the mop again. Vera wandered into the living room. “Isaac, Finn, this would be the ideal time to leave the kitchen.”

Isaac nodded and looked to Sam. “Ready?” he said softly. Pain flickered in his eyes, tightened in his mouth.

They met his gaze and nodded. “Sure.”

Isaac bent and let Sam wrap their arm around his neck. He gently lifted Sam in his arms and didn’t even seem to notice the whipped cream smearing on his own shirt. He walked with Sam to the towel and kicked off his sticky shoes. He disappeared with them down the hall. Isaac came back around the corner with an armload of Sam’s clothes. After a moment, Finn heard the sound of water rushing through the pipes.

“These need to be washed, I guess,” Isaac said as he stopped at the towel that now served to bar entry to anyone with clean feet. He held out the clothes. “Here are these, I can go grab them some clean ones from their room.”

“Your shirt has whipped cream all over it,” Vera said from the couch, where she sat with her arm around Tori’s shoulders.

Isaac glanced down. “Oh,” he said, and pulled at the hem. “How… This got everywhere, Jesus,” he huffed. He dropped Sam’s clothes onto the towel and pulled his own shirt in one fluid motion.

Everyone in the house seemed to go silent at once. Isaac stared at the shirt in his hand as if dumbfounded at what he’d just done. His scars shone white against his skin, crossing his chest, his arms, his back. He shivered and folded his arms across his chest. A flush crept up his neck.

Finn couldn’t even remember the last time Isaac had had his shirt off around the others. It certainly hadn’t been since he’d been captured by Gavin – almost exactly a year ago, now.

Gray took the shirt from Isaac’s hand and let it fall onto the small pile of Sam’s clothes. “Thank you, Isaac,” they said casually, as if nothing had happened. “We’ll get these in the wash.”

Isaac blinked and took a step back. “Yeah… okay, thanks, Gray,” he murmured. He turned and disappeared down the hall towards the bedrooms. When he emerged again, he had a long-sleeved shirt on. He went to Gavin’s side at the counter and pulled him close. Isaac pressed his lips to Gavin’s forehead, his gaze unfocused.

Edrissa all but materialized in front of Finn, holding a towel. That girl walks so quietly, I swear to god… Finn shivered as they realized why it might have suited Edrissa to learn to walk so quietly in the first place. They wet the towel at the sink and began to scrub the whipped cream from the cabinets.

Gray carried the mop to the far corner of the kitchen and began to clean the floor of the last of the sticky residue. Edrissa grabbed the small pile of clothes, and the large pile of sticky towels, and took them into the laundry room to start a load of laundry in the washing machine.

A washing machine. I’ve never even had one of those before.

Finn cleaned the cabinets, and Gray mopped the floor, dipping the mop back into the bucket, squeezing it out, wiping the floor clean again. The whole room smelled of lemon, now.

Finn finished with the cabinets and took off their shoes to avoid tracking the whipped cream any further into the house. Gray got all the traces of whipped cream off the floor and took the mop and bucket back into the laundry room to be cleaned out.

Sam wandered back into the living room, limping slightly on their injured foot. Finn practically leapt forward to help them before Sam held out a hand.

“I’m good,” they said softly. “And I, um, figured out how to take the bandages off and put them back on once I was clean.” They lifted their head and grinned at Finn and Isaac in turn.

“Oh,” Finn said, and a smile spread slowly across their face. “That’s… geez, Sam, you trying to force me out of the job?”

“Oh, I gave you a run for your money,” Sam said with a laugh.

“Hey, um, Sam?” Edrissa said softly from the kitchen. Her cheeks flushed red. “Do you and Zachariah, um… want to help me make more?”

Sam’s grin widened. “You bet,” they said, and limped back into the kitchen.

Edrissa pointed to a high shelf. “Zachariah, could you…? The big bowl.”

Zachariah smiled gently, and reached up to get the bowl Edrissa was pointing at.

Continued here

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