#mcu: oh yeah that is fucked up. is.. howard still alive then?

[the-faultofdaedalus]

every day i think about howard and maria’s deaths in the 2004 draft script

[ironxkid]

why don't you like endgame or civil war

((hoo buddy, idk what brought this up but salt under the cut!! Like... a lot of salt - specifically regarding Endgame lmao

I’m gonna start off with CACW because it’s a short response lol

I don’t like it simply because I was done with the infighting between the Avengers. The found family crumbs we were given in Endgame was something I really wanted to see, and them just... ripping them apart frustrated me lol

honestly, the movie was... fine? Idk, I found it to be a lil slow for my taste (it felt like it just dragged on when I watched it in theaters), and I just don’t care for it in general  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Also, ngl, I’m really bummed that Captain America: Serpent Society was a joke announcement because that sounds dope as hell and I really wanted to see that before I realized it’d been a joke dfgjhdsfhj

but, yeah, literally just because CACW is specifically an infighting movie annoys me to no end so I just won’t watch it again dgsfjhsfdhj

now, Endgame?

fuck Endgame

I. have a lot of issues with it, all of which are major grievances throughout the fandom. I’m pissed they killed Natasha and didn’t even bother giving her a fucking funeral because, I quote from Joe Russo, “Well, Tony does not have another movie. Tony is done. And Natasha has another film. And Marvel Universe obviously does not have to move forward linearly anymore. But that character still has more screen time coming.” (see here) and that annoys the hell out of me. She’s getting another movie - great! So you killed one of the few characters doing her fucking best to keep everything together at the compound, the one who was taking charge, give her a big role, and then murk her and... give her nothing but a brief mention at the end. Like... what the fuck? Natasha deserved so much better than what she was given. Tony’s funeral could’ve (and, frankly, should’ve) been a funeral for him, Natasha, and Vision because god forbid we see anyone mourn Vision other than Wanda

(actually this post covers how Endgame fucked over the MCU women perfectly, though Wanda’s not mentioned :c )

plus... Tony’s not done lol - he’s still a massive figure in the films/shows despite RDJ not acting in them, so his character has left shockwaves that aren’t dying any time soon. Natasha... basically disappeared, and I believe she would’ve been dropped completely if it wasn’t for the fact she does have a film coming out soon. Which, frankly, seems awesome and all, but it’s a film that goes back to post-CACW pre-IW and... frankly doesn’t give me any reason to understand why that means she didn’t get a funeral. She’s not coming back in future movies/shows that are in present MCU timeline - her movie is set in the past. She could’ve gotten a decent sendoff 

now, Clint’s arc as Ronin rubs me the wrong way. I know it’s a huge thing in the comics, and it’s not him taking a different mantle that I have an issue with. It’s the fact he, a white man, went around murdering people and got off scot-free. Yes, he was targeting genuinely bad people, but... to show that, they specifically singled out Mexican cartels and the yakuza (Japanese mafia, essentially) - so, in other words, the bad guys were people of color! I feel like I don’t need to explain how fucked up that is. And, to clarify, I love Clint! Clint is honestly one of my favorite characters, and the whole thing was just handled... poorly in the film

Tony’s arc genuinely hurts. This is a man who has suffered for years and has tried to make things right, and finally got a chance to settle down. He finally retired from the Avengers, finally settled down, and had a fucking life he could enjoy despite his ghosts, and yet... His arc ends with a message of “tortured soul finally gets rest by dying”. Because, y’know, it’s great seeing yet another long-suffering character only reaching peace through death, because god forbid they let characters heal! He could’ve still caused the second Snap, and he could’ve survived. He could’ve finally been able to step away for good and focus on his family, focus on recovering, and be truly happy. What’s so wrong with letting him stay alive so he can rest and be with his family? What’s so wrong with letting a long-suffering character finally find peace after one last bang? 

plus it pisses me off that they’re now using him as a reasoning as to why bad things are still happening. Why is this person the bad guy? Because Tony Stark somehow may or may not have done something that hurt them! Even though most of that really stems from Howard or Obadiah. Tony just ends up getting the blame in their place. He’s just an easy target to use, much like the tesseract seems to be the go-to answer for why things go wrong. But this is a different train of thought

Steve’s ending pisses me off just as much as the next person lmao. You take a character who has acknowledged he no longer belongs in the past (which, funnily enough, was written by the Russos), aaaaaaand have him go back to the past while ignoring two important people in his life that were still right there. He got Bucky and Sam back, and he leaves them. His arc is ruined within a matter of minutes, and it paints a hella bad picture of him in the process. He goes back in time to stay with Peggy (which ultimately destroys her own arc, and the fact she’s a person outside of her relationship (or lack thereof) with him because, y’know, why have her be able to move on and be her own person?), and we’re supposed to believe he’s fine with everything he knows from the future? Fine with knowing Bucky’s trapped with HYDRA and is suffering as the Winter Soldier? Fine with knowing HYDRA has infested SHIELD from day one? Fine with knowing Howard and Maria are going to die? Fine with royally fucking up the timelines? We’re supposed to believe he sat back and did nothing with all of that? They could’ve had him still hand the shield over to Sam - they could’ve let Steve stay an Avenger without the mantle

also the fact the Russos said he didn’t recognize Red Skull when he returned to Vormir to return the soul stone? Like... what the fuck?? Not to mention he literally returns the stone to Vormir, which “soul for a soul”, and they didn’t bring Nat back that way??

and now onto Thor. Thor... holy fuck is this hitting something personal for me. Thor was ridden with guilt - he was furious with himself, hated himself, and blamed himself for failing to stop the Snap. He fell into a massive depression, and... was promptly danced around as laughing stock. Like, “oh! look at Thor! he’s fat and drunk because he’s depressed haha!” - like fuck off. It’s not funny in any form. His suffering was made into a joke and it pisses me off because I suffer from depression. A lot of people suffer from depression. It’s not funny. It’s fucking terrifying at times. I wasted a shit ton of money on a stupid online sim game because it was a distraction - it gave me... god, I wouldn’t even say temporary happiness, but it gave me something to temporarily help, and I still hate myself for doing it. It was a poor decision on my part, and I wish I could change it. And, during that time, I was scared because I couldn’t see myself pulling out of it. I thought I was gonna feel that way forever. I called out of work multiple times because there were days I couldn’t stop crying (something I still feel horrible for doing), I couldn’t get myself to contact any of my friends for months, and it was all because the medication I was on at the time... stopped working. Thankfully, my depression doesn’t work in a way that makes me a danger to myself, so that wasn’t an issue, but it still fucking sucked. And to see a character that I could relate to on such a personal level treated as laughing stock fucking hurt. I’m not sharing this for sympathy - I’m sharing this because it Thor’s arc hit home and it’s literally the main reason why I will not watch Endgame again

this is more of a nitpick than anything else, but... I didn’t really care for Carol in it tbh? Which is unfortunately because Captain Marvel is one of my absolute favorite movies! And I’m well aware she was introduced in Endgame while CM was being drafted, but that in itself is annoying?? Because Carol was originally going to be introduced in AoU, but was cut because it wasn’t going to introduce her character properly. And yet they decide to introduce her character in a clusterfuck of a movie before her movie is in the final stages, and proceed to release her movie first and then give a complete different characterization in her following appearance

honestly I just wanna cover this now to clarify some things regarding Carter and her backstory: the only reason I keep Endgame as is is because it felt easier for me to do so for the purpose of bending canon for specific threads. I wanted to stay as true to the given plots as possible to help with fudging of both the movies and her background, and also because I didn’t want anyone to feel like I was trying to force my own headcanons onto them, y’know? 

I’m just gonna plug this here because fuck it lol, but I did start a fix-it fic regarding Endgame that you can read here! I... probably won’t finish it tbh, and I haven’t gone over it in a hot minute so it might be riddled with errors ahah - plus I’m not sure about how I wrote the characters! I get nervous when writing canon characters because I feel like I’ll miss their characterization completely, which is actually why I,,, rarely rp canon characters dgfjhgsfdhj

also the image in the doc was created by @/archervale!! 

[moontheoretist]

Notes from tie-in MCU comics:

Part 1:

[DISCLAIMER: I was making those notes without actually writing down from which comic they come from, so now I am... well... confused about the proper placement of them, but I tried to discern them anyway.]

CAPTAIN AMERICA THE FIRST AVENGER:

Lol, Zola was developing exo-skeleton looking like Iron Man suit and Vanko's suit in 1934. I kind of think part of Steve's dislike of Iron Man was because of that exo-suit. Also, Steve just saved the guy in a suit.

"The chain is only as strong as its weakest link" said twice to Steve, once by military doctor and second by Schmidt.

Poor Erskine, his family was taken as hostages.

Howards says "carefully open the casing". Steve does smash instead.

Oh no, Red Skull said that weapon can always be taken from you so you have to become the weapon. It echoes the sentiment behind the creation of Iron Man too closely.

Lol, Roosevelt ASKED for Howard PERSONALLY.

"Car is bulletproof!" "and a convertible!" is a funny joke xD

Lol he has bulletproof car because of cigarette's girls angry boyfriends.

Ok, so Howard joined SSR because he HAD BEST FUN IN MONTHS.

Howard has rockets in car and "leaves best toys for himself".

First Steve saves a Nazi from a tank, now he obliterates them with said tank. Pick a side, Steve. I know guy in the armor was helpless, but c'mon. You either don't kill or kill. You cannot just willy nilly choose. BTW does it echo saving Iron Man or smth?

Call back to floating car by a joke about floating tank.

Aw, no, Erskine's family died in concentration camp from typhus. (Those camps were awful, but are not shown in the comics. You better believe that they weren’t very nice places to live even without being overworked and killed by the Nazis).

Oh no, Bucky was nearly killed by SSman! But Howling Commandos stopped him.

Bucky doesn't like his name lol. Also no Jimmy nickname for this guy.

Ok so Howard Stark was based on Hughes and Tony was based on someone Howard hated - Oppenheimer.

Ok, now Phillips made a foreshadowing for Cradle in the AoU. It even looks similar to Project Rebirth.

Oho my theory that Erskine heard Bucky talk to Steve and that doctor knew Steve lied is proved in this comics. They knew, they had a file on him and Erskine just picked him, saving his stupid ass from consequences.

Cap just threw a knife.

IRON MAN 2:

In the comics it looks more as if Obadiah sold Vanko instead of Howard, because Howard looks so surprised at what Vanko did, that it is impossible to assume that he was the one who sent the agents after Vanko. He looks surprised at the whole incident, Vanko betraying him and agents being there to apprehend him. One agent acts as if it was Howard's idea all along, but that line could be also read as just informing a bystander that they will deal with the issue instead.

Tony projected a drone which could clean whole desert full of mines with 100% accuracy and 0% detonation.

Also comics confirm that Tony cannot even have 12h break without Howard coming at him and demanding him to work when he is just a goddamn teenager.

Tony was just fighting for 19h, got a shower and has to go out again.

"If I hear of another innocent being put in a harm's way just to advance some pointless military agenda... there will be consequences" sounds like call back to Hulk.

Hm, Tony made 12 people work on one job? Also Natasha hates being called Nat and she drugged Samantha (the actual PA which applied for Stark Industries) to take her place.

 [As of now those comics confirmed to me that Captain America joined army out of selfish reasons and that Tony was overworking himself as Iron Man and when he wasn't he was either partying, probably to relax in that way, or making new tech which saves lives.]

Lol, Coulson was so excited to look for Captain. Nick even made a joke about finding his fav action figure.

Lol, World Security Council wanted to get Tony's weapons and nearly fired Fury for trying to make Avengers.

Fury is like Tony. He hates his superiors. He will do as they say but won't stop doing what he does.

Lol, Fury got a call Tony will be dead and he jumped out of his goddamn bed asap.

Fury was actively stopping Stern from getting Iron Man by scheduling his meeting with Department of Defense "when Stern is busy" xD

Lol Fury says no to Ross before he hears what he wants. This is so funny.

Ok, so Fury got Lithium Dioxide for Tony, asked if it could be made into permanent cure, how sweet of him, but also learned that it could INSTANTLY KILL HIM instead and still made Natasha basically inject Tony with it WITHOUT CONSENT! So I dunno if he really cared about him when he asked about permanent cure or it was just more optimal for his plans. Also he got the cure during Tony's and Rhodey's battle at the mansion, so we cannot say he had a cure and didn't give it right away when he could.

"Don't blow your cover unless Stark is going to kill himself". Hm. So he wants him alive.

And yeah, he ordered Natasha to stick him with lithium dioxide when he distracted him.

Lol, Fury yelled at Coulson for letting Tony leave the mansion xD

THOR??? (I got lost in my notes, I didn’t write which comic was which)

LOL CLINT CANNOT EVEN TAKE VACATION. Also the speed with which he responded to possible alien crashsite, epic. He jumped and went as if it was Christmas, aww Clint.

Why Clint is giving money back to some store which suffered due to their operation? I mean it was nice and all, but who will give the money back to Clint? Fury?

So it was Hawkeye's idea to let Thor loose.

In the meantime Loki was on scene and tried to get Mjolnir but it didn't respond.

AVENGERS PRELUDE:

Oho, poor Fury, didn't sleep in a few days.

Oho, Fury yelled at Natasha.

"Do not let Ross take Banner, dead or alive". How cute of you, Nick, to confirm that you do not care.

Blonsky is suicidal. Going at Hulk and kicking him in the face? That's a death wish.

Ah so Blonsky is enhanced.

Hahaha, joke about lifting a hammer but applied to the Asgardian sentinel, lol.

Ross literally accessed SHIELD databases.

Natasha was raised in Stalingrad lol.

After seeing Hulk, Abomination and The Leader Natasha finally says it is too much to handle for SHIELD.

Oho, so making Tony finish Howard's project was an objective, not saving his life. He wanted it for Tesseract.

I dunno if he is lying or really was doing this whole shit for the Tesseract. Also points for sticking in WSC's face that Ross nearly destroyed New York thanks to them.

Shield has whiplash suit and it's arc reactor!

THEY ACTIVATED THE SENTINEL AND THEN THEY WANT TO DISMANTLE IT AND MAKE DOZENS SMALL ONES!

Huh, implication that Natasha may beat the whole bunker of SHIELD agents up, because they're men, lol.

So Selvig used the element Stark invented to kick-start the Tesseract after all.

"Good for a laugh from time to time" lol. Clint the comedian.

Why that machine holding a Tesseract looks like Arc Reactor?

Huh so Selvig was Loki and he made a comment about Tony being strange for "badassium".

BLACK WIDOW BACKGROUND IN ONE OF THE COMICS, DUNNO WHICH:

Natasha talks about her cover personalities like vtubers about their avatars.

Fjodorov knows something about stolen bootleg technology of Tony Stark which he managed to acquire?

Natasha really likes narrating her story. Time slows when you have a training? Like roller coaster on first ridge?

"With some small regret, I bid farewell to Tatiana. She's outlived her usefulness" thinks Natasha after she took off her wig and no longer plays Tatiana. "If she were real. She'd be dead". "It's nice though, to pretend while it lasts... that I was ever as innocent as her".

Natasha really likes playing those roles.

Haha, Natasha holds one mission over Coulson's head forever even though he never failed as her control again.

"Part of the reason why I am so good at the undercover work is that I actually like being other people. There is a lot I've done that I regret. When I leave that other identity behind, whether I slip out from underneath it voluntarily or it's ripped away from my grasp, it always hits me like a shock. Like being awakened from a deep sleep, back to who I really am". "It's good to be home". Is she speaking about her slip into Black Widow again as home or is she referring to Russia?

Natasha left a guy dangling from a building and said it could be worse, he could be naked.

"Good man" says Natasha as if she was training guys to obey her will.

Oho, Natasha is interested in someone who wants to be her.

Also she is narrating that police in Russia would not suspect Tatiana to be so resourceful.

Natasha wants to save that girl from herself, because nobody did that for her when she was in the same position.

I mean, Natasha killed some people that day already so I don't get the point of her not killing those guys and saying that she changed, when in the club she killed a few of the goons already and later too. Where is the point of her change if she kills anyway? What is this change about Black Widow - Natasha Romanoff if she kills people but just not always? She cannot claim to change for the better just because she didn't kill two goons. And Sofia should see that not killing all of them doesn't mean she doesn't kill at all. But I guess leaving so many alive still counts for Sofia as Natasha going soft.

Coulson, you idiot, I am happy you came to save Natasha, but Sofia thought those guys were Natasha's back up. It all wouldn't happen if not for you making them appear there. You fucked up everything for Natasha, Coulson.

Uh, Natasha has the same weird shtick Tony does. She blames herself for the decision of her superior? Yeah, she enabled him to make that decision, but it was still his decision to send those men to find Natasha, so their death is on him, not on Natasha.

Huh, so Natasha's model persona Konn feels empty when nobody looks at her, because her whole life was being the centre of attention? It's kind of sexist cover.

She is a hand model and this guy is disgusting. Natasha I agree with those YUCK.

Natasha doing tehee is so weird.

Also playing a "he sent me here so hours would fly by" is so gross, but inner Natasha voice says nothing yet.

Lol the guy just assumed she is stupid, because she made tehee sounds. Like, goddammit, men are so easy to fool. Condescending little creep indeed.

Ok, so Natasha doesn't have any computer knowledge to say what those lines of code are, but she knows Stark can.

Ugh, Natasha, that line about telling his friends that they did something he imagines is so not feminist of you. It just enables creeps like that to objectify women more and treat them like idiots and fucktoys.

Sofia killed the agent even when Natasha gave her what she wanted.

Natasha wants to save lives and often fails at it too.

She jumped off the yacht to save the guy even though she knew he is dead? I mean shot in the head usually means instant death.

She doesn't get lines of code but can upload tracking device on it. Good. Also she wanna kill Sofia now.

"When I go in for the kill, there's no one I'd rather be than who I really am".

Ah so they had a targeting software for the copy of the Jericho missile manufactured by Hammer.

So they were moving Jericho in parts around the world. They should be happy Tony didn't notice. (Because then they would all just go boom and be dead lol).

"Berserk bots a girl's best friends!"

Frampton wants to have space tourism.

Ten Rings again.

Why Frampton wants to strike Korean DMZ?

Aha, global destabilisation for Ten Rings, gotcha.

Oho, so the info about Natasha busting the trafficking ring comes back. It turns out she accidentally trapped the girls inside when she busted the place. She basically says she didn't know they were there but even if she did she wasn't nice back then.

So Natasha says that Sofia was more her than she ever was, meaning the Black Widow, meaning that Natasha always had softness in her which Sofia didn't have and that Sofia got her just reward for wanting to be the perfect Black Widow.

Still sexist move to make a victim of sex trafficking ring become a morally corrupt murderer who would destabilise world for free if she could, but does that for money, because money is nice addition to her new hobby of fucking humanity up.

"Some people are not worth saving" Not so long ago plenty would say that about me".

AVENGERS:

Oho Stark Tower is the first fully clean-energy powered skyscraper.

Pepper thinks inside the box and Tony thinks outside the box.

Oh, so Tony still says that Rhodey had stolen the suit, but then he admits that it could give him heart attack, because it was not calibrated for him, so I wonder if he really wanted Rhodey to have it or never wanted Rhodey to have it at all.

"I got them to agree that all starktech remains proprietary to you as long as War Machine is on loan to the department of defense".

Lol wow, War Machine was an insult? Anyway he means that Rhodey won't be using Mark II because Tony has new suit for him.

"I am not Iron Man" people yell Iron Man at Rhodey "Ah, forget it" xD

How is Tony saying that he couldn't find anything to go after Gulmira when he was literally busting Ten Rings in Iron Man 2 tie-in comic?

Hahaha, Rhodey wanna get a publicist so people would recognise he is War Machine, not Iron Man.

Rhodey is so vicious. "I could have taken your hand with it but not doing it is more fun".

Oho so Tony THREE MONTHS after Tony was putting S on Stark Tower there is Battle of New York and Rhodey is in Hong Kong.

Incoming call: Martini, seriously? You call Tony MARTINI?

Also for some reason this Tony has blue eyes.

Rhodey is so cocky lol. "I haven't seen anything that can take me down".

"When am i gonna learn to keep my mouth shut?" xDDD Rhodey cursed himself.

So after Iron Man 2 Tony realised that he couldn't be iron solder alone anymore and made Rhodey an armor? Still, trust was a huge factor here.

Lol did he just make a joke about being so beat up as after clubbing with Tony to a commanding officer? Rhodey, you vicious little shit lol xD

"Battle tank that's about to make me street pizza! But only if I stand and take it, which I have never done in my life". That's useful info. It gives me some insight into who was protecting who at MIT. Rhodey never was taking a crap of other people, so he probably was used to fighting bullies. And I can imagine him standing up to bullies who targeted a kid - Tony Stark.

Rhodey chooses to fight smarts with smarts.

DID HE JUST MAKE HIS WAY OF LANDING A FRIGGIN MISSILE STYLE? XD

His commander asks if he is crazy. He definitely friggin is lol.

Rhodey just gave his superior a scare when he let a tank run him over. They thought he died.

OMG Ten Rings assumed War Machine is easier target to get tech from and Rhodey feels offended, but happy they know who he is.

Rings had stark tech in that tank, oh no. Tony will be pissed even if those are old black market stuff.

AWWW RHODEY WAS WORRIED ABOUT TONY WHEN HE DIDN'T RESPOND!

"Don't do this to me, man". "Holy...! That was SOME situation" says Rhodey when he saw chitauri flying whale dead. Ok so Avengers met Rhodey in that shawarma place.

Pepper decorates according to feng shui?

So Ten Rings scanned Rhodey's armor with any scanner available and collected a lot of data on the armor anyway.

[liver-of-prometheus]

A conversation I had tonight part 2, electric boogaloo: a thread

Me: So, on the subject of Loki and Hogun

ever notice how in Thor, Hogun is the only person to not do any of these?: a: brush off Loki's abuse, b: convince him it was fine, c: mock or hate him, d: deny Loki's abuse existed bc "they're our friends, how could they hate you?" "your friends Thor, your friends."

Jay: Yes

Me: and, when Thor flips a table, Loki's watching him

the warriors 3 and sif walk into the room

Hogun takes one look at the overturned table, then looks at Loki

he has an expression as if he's asking "What did thor shout about this time? Are you alright?"

when they're walking to the bifrost, Hogun watches Loki talk to the guard

he says nothing, and the look on his face suggests he also wanted to have a guard get odin, and quickly

i bet he also hoped heimdall would stall them

he's the only one that ever shows genuine concern for loki

in jotunheim, Hogun heeds Loki's yell first

he doesn't want to be there either

he'd hoped there wouldn't be fighting

Jay: Too bad they just fucking stabbed him to death

Me: and in the throne room, when they want to retrieve thor, Hogun looks confused, then understanding, and then even worried about loki's well-being

the "arrogance" from loki sitting on the throne?

it's power rush

hogun can see it

and he's secretly hoping that bringing thor back will help

I'm fairly sure in their youth, loki and hogun would've had some very intelligent discussions

but as they grew older, loki started seeing hogun's concern as suspicion

all because of how everyone else treated him

just because he's kinda emo, and looks kinda adopted, didn't make him less of a prince

I think that as thor's advisor he'd be one hell of a politician, and tactician

he's an Odinson in name, if nothing else

Jay: And Odin was like you can both be kings, but not you loki you're a d o p t e d

Me: that makes him a prince

"you were both born to be kings but only one can rule"

wakanda bullshit is that?!

Jay: They would be so much better as a team

Even though thor kinda sucks

Me: Thor's head has been up his ass his whole life

Jay: That might be mostly odins fault tho

Me: he's blind to his brother's plight

and was coddled and over praised by literally everyone

no wonder he doesn't understand loki's anger

thor fans are idiots

Jay: Mmhm

Me: also, [I showed a picture of Thor, Loki and Hela]

who looks adopted

Jay: THERE WE GO

Me: the brown-haired jock with lightning powers?

Jay: the two who got fucked over by Odin are the emo ones

Me: or the two magic users with the most badass colour scheme out there

and loki's supposed to be adopted

Jay: Its a p a t t e r n

Me: sure

yeah, loki's the foundling

says the guy who made his daughter into a blood-hungry war mongering lunatic

who covers up any and all mistakes

who coddled and built up his second, making him feel as though he could have anything

Jay: He literally wanted to erase both "problem children" by locking them away

Oh my god I'm getting really pissed Odin FUCKING S U C K S

Me: while simultaneously breaking down and shattering the personage of his youngest, teaching them to fear their own blood

and body

ODIN IS THE WORST FATHER IN CINEMATIC HISTORY

Jay: bitch don't even deserve the title

Me: howard stark and thanos wish they were as terrible as him

ODIN SHOULD HAVE NEVER BEEN KING

I WOULD'VE EVEN SETTLED FOR FUCKING TYR

HE WOULDVE BEEN A BETTER DAD

SURELY THE LITERAL GENERAL OF THE ARMIES WOULD SEE SOME VALUE IN AT LEAST POWERING UP AND COMING PREPARED WITH AN EXTRA KNIFE

AND STRATEGY OVER BRUTE FORCE

BECAUSE THAT WORKED SOOOO WELL WHEN ODIN SENT THE VALKYRIES TO FIGHT HELA

Jay: ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Me: why do asgardians hate magic anyway?

Jay: I was actually about to get into that

Me: in the myths, even though it wasn't very vikinger or manly, the aesir and vanir and alfar were cool with it

welcomed it

and used it so often

THE LITERAL MONARCHS AND ALL SEEING GATEKEEPER OF ASGARD USE MAGIC ON A DAILY BASIS

WTF IS WRONG WITH CONVENIENCE?

magic makes things easier

and it's great for augmenting fighting

and works great on trial

Jay: and not only convenience long range is better strategy than melee

Me: if they even really have those

long range produces fewer casualties

Jay: exactly

Me: surely a society built on war would recognise that

it's easier

Jay: But no

Me: volley arrows, have people with knives and swords come round from the back, surround the enemy, kill them

Jay: Odin just likes raw power that only he can have at whoever else's expense

Me: then pick up your stuff when it's over

ODIN is a control freak

no one can convince me otherwise

Jay: Odin is a bitch

Me: anyone that likes mcu odin is destined to be an abuser in a relationship

Jay: Pissing me off Odin and heimdall

Heimdall is all seeing Yet loki is getting tortured by thanos after he tried to kill himself when Odin still told him he wasn't good enough, and he's getting tortured and what does Heimdall do?

N o t h i n g

Thor still thought loki was dead

Me: Heimdall couldn't him see my ass

he can see through space and time

but not a collection of asteroids?

bullshit

they didn't look

Jay: Plus they should be keeping track of thanos anyway

Me: yeah

Jay: So maybe they did look

Me: he's been killing for decades

Thor, Odin, and Frigga are three of the worst people

"it is only by the grace of your mother that you are alive"

bitch he wanted to die

he knew thanos would come for him at some point

frigga didn't want him to die because it would look bad on her as a mother

Jay: That makes me mad too when people are like lol loki faked his death on the bridge

Me: "define worse" is right

Jay: BITCH no

He wanted to die

Me: not faked

tried

and failed

he wanted to die

he couldn't

Jay: And launched himself off a fucking bridge

Into the void

[hackedmotionsensors]

Here we go Endgame lets talk about it! 

BELOW THE CUT

So I’ll say this!!! Over all!!! I liked it a lot. For a lot of reasons.

I also HAAAATTTEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDD a lot of some of the choices. That’s okay. We can have mixed feelings about movies especially the end of a saga. I think they did a good job of getting nods where they needed nods, bringing in storylines from previous movies and conversations that needed to happen.

And they fucking whiffed it on at least THREE REALLY IMPORTANT THINGS!!!

So lets start with what I liked.

1) STEVE TONY EVENT. DO YOU HEAR ME IT WAS A STEVE TONY EVENT  aaaah oh my god. From the second Tony lands back on the planet and Steve RUNS to him before even Pepper and he’s holding him and just the look of agony as Pepper takes him away and the fight where Tony says ALL THE SHIT WE HAD BEEN SAYING!!!! WHERE WERE YOU! YOU LIAR!!! and he RIPS HIS HEART OFF OF HIS CHEST AND GIVES IT TO STEVE BECAUSE YOU FUCKING BROKE HIS HEART YOU FUCKING FUCKED UP STEVE!!!!! FUCKK!!!! And then reconciling because “Resentment is corrosive” UGHHH!!! And Steve just barely containing himself when Tony shows up ughh!! UGHHH!!!!!!! AND THE ASS JOKE!!! THERE’S NO HETEROSEXUAL EXPLANATION ABOUT THAT!!!! TONY SAW STEVES ASS AND WAS LIKE TAN FRANCED IT LIKE BITCH YOU NEED AN FRENCH TUCK OF MY DING DONG IN YOUR BUTT!!! and Steve over the intercom being like “omg tony not in front of the kids” AND A STEVETONY SOLO MISSION!!!!!! 

A STEVE TONY...

SOLO

MISSION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TONY CALLING STEVE MY MAN  WOW. WOW. FUCKING EXCELLENT ON ALL ACCOUNTS THANKS SO MUCH!! I was given some bread thank you I will eat this stevetony bread nom nom nom nom nom.

2) Tony’s arc in this story was really beautiful. He finally got what he wanted, some perspective and closure with Howard. And I know initially you want to go “Hey Howard was really abusive” and yeah he was. But its complicated. Because Tony even says in Homecoming he was trying to break the cycle of abuse and he DID with Peter and Morgan. You can see just HOW MUCH he cares for his daughter and he was willing to say fuck you to the UNIVERSE in favor of not losing her. Its always a different perspective when you see your parents as people and not as YOUR PARENTS. 

Also Tony lying on the table with Natasha UuU. A lot of the interactions with Tony and the other characters were so good. Tony and Rocket. Tony and Nebula. Tony and Carol (tho brief). Tony arguing with Pierce like his little gay senses were like “This guys a nazi I bet”

3) I genuinely liked the Time Heist. I DID  NOT LIKE THE RULES OF TIME TRAVEL IN THIS MOVIE BUT I’LL GET TO THAT. But I looooved the Time Heist. From the New York stuff with Steve fighting Steve and knowing his dumbass loses his shit when he hears things like “Bucky’s still alive” and being done with his own stupid shit “I can do this all day” “YEAH I KNOW” (which btw at this point was basically the last thing he said to Tony in Civil War so maybe that doesn’t have its plucky little fire anymore and now is a sore spot). I loved Loki running away with the Space Stone (even tho as of now I’m still not sure what the FUCK THAT MEANS!? more on that in a sec) Loki making fun of Cap. Loki rolling his eyes at Odin. Tony dressed in a shield outfit screaming Medic!!! The gang all on the elevator and Hulk screaming about it and LOKI WAVING HIS HAND AT THE HULK AS THE DOORS SHUT!! TONY SITTING ON THE BRIEFCASE! SCOTT GOING “how the FUCK did you not know they were Hydra LOOK AT THEM They’re a COP!” Then jumping forward to the 70s and Steve’s legs that went all the way up to his asshole and Tony dressed as a doctor

I drew a doodle of it here you go lol I’ll post it properly later

oh did this not happen? Idk what movie you were watching.

4) The big battle at the end was SO FUCKING COMIC BOOK I WAS LOSING IT. Also I keep calling it the Battle of Five Armies or Return of the King lol T’challa BATHED IN A HALO OF LIGHT LIKE YES WE STAN A KING. MY WIFE

MY.

WIFE!!!!!!!!

VALKYRIE!!! ON HER BEAUTIFUL WHITE HORSE!!!! (also not being given an actual name and called Valkyrie is the funniest goddamn thing. Like that’s like going into a Footlocker and talking to the manager but calling them Manager)

CAROL!!!!!! WITH HER BUTCH ASS HAIRCUT PUNCHING THANOS IN THE MOUTH AND WRECKING HIS SHIT

WANDA FINALLY FUCKING FLYING. LIKE. F L Y I N G. THAT is what the Scarlet Witch is SUPPOSED TO DO!! SHE’S SUPPOSED TO BE SO POWERFUL IT TOOK EVERYONE TO TAKE HER DOWN CMON!!!!!! And she almost got him too. Honestly if it were down to Carol and Wanda they probably could have ended Thanos alone. 

Korg coming back for more comic relief AND PUTTING HIM IN TAIKA’S PINEAPPLE ONESIE!!!! ARE YOU KIDDING.

5) This is controversial. And I know it won’t age well. And that’s okay and feel free to disagree with me entirely. 

But I liked Fat Thor lmfao. I know it was played as a joke for the wrong reasons but I laughed. I was like fuck yes his belly looks like mine and that’s not why it was funny and it SHOULDN’T BE but I laughed lol. But on the other hand I think it had partially to do with Hemsworth constantly being like “no no we don’t need a shirtless scene” or just sort of a gag at how Marvel always has a shirtless scene and its just kind of funny to have it not be someone cut. EVEN THOUGH its a fat suit and I can’t take off my fat suit but Hemmy can and that’s kinda shitty. 

but I laughed. I can’t help it. He was a whole ass mess and I thought it was funny. And I know there are Thor fans out there who wanted more for him but like I said before this was a SteveTony event. This movie and this win worked because it was Steve and Tony finally coming together again.

It felt honestly the most comic book Avengers of the entire series. 

And true to comic book events

it whiffed the landing.

Before I get into dislikes I’ll say that I liked this movie more than I disliked it. I cried H A R D at the end of the movie. Because its not a movie that’s an on its own kind of movie. You had to have gone through the journey to get here. The pay off is completely lost if you only watch this movie. Or you only watch one or two of the MCU. Or if you’re like a few people I’ve talked to where they only like Steve and Tony. Or they only like Thor and Loki. Or they only like the Guardians and hate the avengers. If you have hate in your heart for any of these characters the payoff of this movie is pretty much lost.

The theme of this movie is clearly about moving on when things come to an end. When things stop or end or we lose people we love you have to move on. Steve says that at the beginning of the movie to our apparent gay representative straight director Joe Russo.

But like Tony said before.

Steve’s a fucking liar lmfao

But lets not start there. Lets start with the fucking timeline.

I hate.

I H A  T E EEEEEEEEE TIME TRAVEL!!!!!! AS A PLOT!!!!!!! WITHOUT ANY RULES!!!!!!!!!

I enjoyed what we SAW of the Time travel but the rules itself DIDN’T MAKE ANY FUCKING SENSE.

So when they’re suiting up Hawkeye for the test run Bruce explicitly says that all these movies that say “if you go into the past and fuck up the past you fuck up the timeline and the present/future is fucked because you’ve changed things”

ARE WRONG. HE SAYS THEY ARE WRONG. He says “If you go into the past. The past becomes your present. But the present then becomes your future. So you can’t go back and un fuck your parents to make you. Or kill baby Thanos. because that happened and you can’t change that but you can change youre present”

WHICH DOESN’T

MAKE ANY

FUCKING

SENSE. BECAUSE THEN YOU AREN”T TIME TRAVELING!!!!!!!!! 

If you go into the past yes YOU are in your present but the world is still being written around you STILL so you go into the past and change something (loki making off with the space stone) that’s CHANGED. You’ve created a new reality.

THEY EXPLICITLY SAY THIS IN DOCTOR STRANGE AND Y’ALL I KNOW DOCTOR STRANGE WAS BORING AS HELL BUT IF YOU’RE GOING TO USE TIME TRAVEL AS YOUR STORY DEVICE THEN YOU CAN’T SAY THAT SHIT IN DOCTOR STRANGE DOESN’T WORK WHEN YOU’VE ESTABLISHED IT AS THE RULES OF TIME TRAVEL.

THE ANCIENT ONE EVEN SAYS “you create a new reality. And it fucks shit up”

LIKE!?!?!??!

WHAT THE HELL!!!

So now Loki has the time Stone in reality B, in reality A Steve goes back and puts the stones back where they belong (and I guess.....gives the soul stone to Red Skull????????? wouldn’t you try to get Natasha back????like that itself is a whole movie of Steve going back and putting things away but ??????) 

And then we get to the end of the movie where Steve says Fuck you to Peggy’s reality A family and now on this timeline where they’ve time traveled he lived an entire life WITH Peggy but like.......you were Captain America and you just said “No don’t worry about JFK being assassinated. Or the Civil Rights movement. Or stopping Bucky in any capacity. Or maybe saving MLK. Or Peggy continuing to join SHIELD. Or stopping ACTUAL NAZIS from infiltrating SHIELD.

Because if you go with this idea that Steve went back and “lived a life” What did he DO then. What did he FUCKING. DO?

You’re not Steve from 1940s going back to 1940s. You’re Steve form 2019 going back to 1940s. No wifi. No medicine. No cell phones? Gays are still being persecuted. You can’t drink from the same fountain as black people (or rather they can’t drink from your white fountain). 

You are.

CAPTAIN.

AMERICA.

and you just said nah fuck it its fine? This shit can all happen but I don’t super care because I get to dance with Peggy. Peggy who on her own had this whole life. Who did all this stuff IN YOUR NAME IN YOUR HONOR. Who married someone else. Who had a FAMILY. Who had a NIECE that you made out with. And just..... wha....

Like if he had gone back and danced with her but came back with Natasha in exchange for the soul stone but during his travels had aged. Or met someone else.

Like movie wise and story wise I get wrapping up Steve’s story. And maybe the person Peggy is talking about in the video of her in TWS is actually Steve from 2019. Maybe that’s it. But it still doesn’t make sense because they FUCKED UP THE RULES OF TIME TRAVEL SO WHO THE FUCK KNOWS.

So. lol I wasn’t a huge fan of Steve at the end of the movie. I know they needed to do something to end the movie with a finality. With Steve being DONE. But instead of finality or closure I just have so many goddamn questions. And I don’t hold it against Evans or even really the directors per say. But I’ll blame Markus and McFeely because they were writing since TWS. They HAD the Cap STORYLINE to write about and that was how they ended it.

its like when you pack for a very important trip and you plan out all your outfits but then wake up late and end up throwing whatever you can find into your suitcase and run out the door.

It felt final and not final.

But I’ll tell you this. From my perspective and obviously I’m going to skew it this way because its me and FEEL FREE to disagree with me.

He left because Tony and Natasha were dead. The two people that he felt the closest to (sorry Sam, Bucky and Sharon [who we didn’t even see as dusted wow]) were gone. Natasha and Steve had become a brother and sister. He would always come back for her clearly. Trying to cheer her up as she’s crying. Natasha understanding Steve’s feeling of being lost. Tony inspiring and fighting with Steve. Like that’s part of what I liked about this is taht you could really feel how Steve and Tony needed each other for this to work but also they needed to not hate each other. 

Also I kinda knew the second Scott said “That’s a one way trip!!” before the 70s bit that Steve was going to stay in the past lol What an asshole.

Also I don’t think it was very UN-Captain America because I think people don’t always realize that a lot of the inspo for the MCU came ALSO from Ultimates. And if Ults Cap was able to go back to the past he would have in a heartbeat. Who was a more depressed Cap? Ults or MCU? I just don’t know.

Now.

Natasha.

This was another one I kind of saw coming from a mile away as soon as it was just the two of them on Vormir. I was kind of hoping they’d Hawkeye a way out of the deal by like throwing his daughters picture or something like that. Or that it would be Hawkeye. But they both had an upcoming movie/series so I didn’t know which way it went.

And then there was that big jump. And I was like oh my god they did it right

AND THEN THEY FUCKING DIDN’T.

Wow. Wowwwwwwwwww

Markus and McFeely 

REALLY DID THAT

THE RUSSO BROTHERS REALLY DID THAT

THEY DID THE SAME FUCKING SCENE TWICE.

The first time you get because Thanos is a dick and abusive and he would absolutely throw his favorite daughter into the soul pit (which I guess Isn’t picky because she didn’t love him back she hated him but I guess its a one way street with the ol’ soul stone)

And they don’t say during that one (far as I remember) that its a permanent exchange. 

But they sure emphasized this time. And they sure killed the original avenger who was the only girl on the team. Who never got a chance to live.

Who Whedon made herself call heself a monster because she can’t have a family and then she gets a found family and then SHE DIES. THEY KILL HER. AFTER HAVING A FAMILY.

WHAT THE FUCK. Like...my problems with Scarjo aside (which are similar with my problems with Paltrow) You DID. BLACK. WIDOW. FUCKING. DIRTY. I don’t care that there’s a movie coming out that was her story. You were supposed to give her a fucking story. And now her story is only how she relates to her TEAM OF MEN.

And now to my last point that I didn’t like. And I don’t hate this one as much as Steve’s ending or Natasha’s ending.

I don’t like that Tony died. I know this is wrapped up in a lot of emotions I have about Tony Stark the character. Robert Downey Jr the person. Tony Stark the character in all his forms is very important to me and I love that he has many forms. 616, Ults, AvAc, Avengers Assemble, the MCU. But his story is important to me. And its heartbreaking. I’m tearing up a bit now writing this out. 

I’m just the type of person that hates that a character, in a fantasy setting where you have wizards, valkyries, robots, talking raccoons and trees, Dave Bautista, a giant green rage monster wearing chinos, that you have to take this one part and make it realistic. That we have to keep realism kill this character off because it doesn’t make sense if someone doesn’t die. Because the stakes aren’t high if you don’t make them personal as well.

Which is true like you don’t have high stakes (the planet or universe getting dusted) if you don’t are about some of the people in that universe personally.

I just would have rather he had retired. Moved onto his little farm with Pepper and Morgan.

I think they did right by Tony. Storywise, ending...all the stuff the dropped the fucking ball on with Natasha and Steve they gave to Tony. And on one hand I get it and I appreciate that because (sorry to nat and steve fans truly) I care more about Tony. Tony started this whole thing. In a miracle of accidents they got the right actor, the right story, the right character, the right director, the right timing technology wise, the right social mood and made solid gold. And none of this would have happened if it weren’t for that amazing accident that happened.

And I think it has more to do with not wanting to let go or move on even though i can always go back to Iron Man 1 at any point and start the journey over again and have a laugh but there’s always going to be that ending where its final. Its done. Its over. And in the simplest of terms. I don’t like it. You have to know when to bow out and I respect and appreciate that. I don’t wanna see Iron Man 8 with geriatric old RDJ trying to fumble into a mocap suit.

I understand. I appreciate. But I don’t have to like it as a person. And that’s okay.

Its all about moving on isn’t it? That’s the theme of the movie. Moving on.

Even if you’re steve and your moving on wipes out the existance of a whole other family lmfaaoidnsfasfada sorry sorry. 

Okay. yeah that’s all I think I can think of. I’m sure there’s a ton more other people have mentioned aside from what I wrote. Like its a LONG movie and I think its hard to say hey “they fucked this up” or “they got this right” for EVERY SINGLE THING. There were so many characters. Nebula’s story could have been better. Thor’s story could have been more involved. Hawkeye could have been more important throughout the series. Janet could have come back for the final fight and healed Tony. Like there’s a ton of “this COULD have happened” But it didn’t. And that’s okay. It may not be right but its okay. I think they wrapped it up as best you could while still making a good movie. I think you probably can go back after a long while and look at the Endgame and go yeah that wasn’t so bad for an ending. Endings are hard to do with any sort of skill. Its why the joke that the third movie always sucks. 

There’s still a ton of stuff to look forward to.

Falcon/Winter Soldier, Loki, Hawkeye, Wanda and Vision (i GUESS??? lol), Black Widow’s movie. 

Maybe Steve solved more than he let on who knows. WHO KNOWS. Maybe Mjolnir left him haflway through the journey when she knew he was going to ditch his 2019 family (who again....mostly dead now)

I love Tony 3000. Which I found out is more than a ton which makes Morgan Stark a lot smarter than I am lmfao

[ssironstrange]

endgame rant

SPOILERS AHEAD PLEASE AVOID IF YOU HAVENT SEEN IT YET

yeah i know i said i wouldn’t post spoiler shit but listen i gotta get this off my chest ok

i have some REAL BIG FUCKING ISSUES with the way the russos handled a lot of plotlines. don’t get me wrong, this movie was amazing and epic and fucking award worthy, but as a fan i’ve taken offense to a Lot of things.

clint

nothing about his ronin story makes a lick of fucking sense in the mcu. his family is dusted so he…… goes on a mass murdering spree??? decides that he should get a haircut and spend the next five years getting an edgy tattoo sleeve??? um. okay then. destroy the past like 10 years of his character having one of the best moral compasses of the entire team. why did he take up using a fucking SWORD in present day? do you know how long it takes to master swordsmanship at the level he was? with at least half of the world’s teachers gone? more than five fucking years thats for damn sure. and between him and natasha dying for the soul stone? it should have been him. i know he had a family and all but listen. nat went through physical and psychological torture. her body was modified against her will. she was brainwashed and used. and finally, FINALLY she gets free of it all, finds a family in the avengers, and continues to try and better herself to make up for things that weren’t even her fault to begin with. and clint? what did he suffer? oh thats right. nothing. he’s just damn good at his job and loves his family. the fact he has a family sucks for sacrifice, but they are well taken care of and every single one of his kids are old enough to understand AND nat would have stepped in immediately as a parental figure to help laura. they fucking fridged nat for clint and i will never forgive that.

thor

here we go. thor’s character legit made me uncomfortable. they went way overboard with the new thor personality. but… fatshaming and making fun of his very real depression and ptsd?? wtf russos. like, haha he let himself go so funny but its NOT. he wasn’t even like…. fat, for one. just a normal dadbod and beer belly. which by the way seems a lot more realistic according to most norse myths of the gods. they were warriors, yeah, but they drank a fucking lot and feasted a fucking lot so. anyway. thor has lost his entire family. not only that but he watched them all die. he saw his mother bleed out. he watched his father disperse into nothingness. he watched the brother he has loved and cherished no matter the amount of times of betrayal and misdeeds get his neck snapped and his lifeless body thrown to the ground. and then the sister he never knew he had killing almost all of your people and then being forced to find a way to kill her. can you imagine trying to cope with that??? and when you put his age into our perspective, he’s only in his 20s. so imagine seeing your whole family die before you’re even 25, then taking on the responsibility of ruling your people. said surviving people are then massacred in front of you with only a few dozen escaping. THEN living with the guilt of blowing your chance to kill the man responsible for that and unable to stop him from decimating half the universe. (and even when he does get revenge on him, it’s too late) tell me you wouldn’t have an atomic level meltdown. thor is suffering so much and all they can do is make fun of him for it and shame him for it. he deserved better.

steve

yall know i don’t like steve. i don’t hate him and i’m not anti-steve, i’ve just never enjoyed his rather inconsistent character and self-righteousness. it felt like we were FINALLY getting a steve i could get behind in this. a steve that swears like he should. a steve who still puts on a brave face for the public but behind closed doors with friends he’s miserable and broken like the rest of them and SHOWS it to them. a steve who realizes he is stuck in the past and just can’t seem to move forward. a steve who i can finally see the culmination of EVERYTHING he’s been through resting on his shoulders and eating him alive inside. finally we were getting a properly layered steve rogers. and then tony came back and that all fell apart. we didn’t get the apology steve owed him (and tbh tony owed him one too but we’ll get to that), we didn’t get a remorseful steve. he didn’t even address the goddamn issue. he went straight back to his bullshit. admittedly he was a better listener this time around and a far better team player overall. it wasn’t a total loss. but. BUT. his ending? no. hell fucking no. i’m happy he and peggy got their life, but it still shouldn’t have happened. how fucking selfish. how fucking backwards of his character. i get he didn’t have a choice in being brought back into the present and that is unfair and sucks for him, but what fucking right did he have to mess with a timeline like that? what right did he have to just decide without telling anyone he was done and giving up? why did he get the fucking happy ending???? steve rogers who looked tony in the eyes and said he wasn’t the kind of man to lay on the wire for someone copped out. steve rogers who knows of all the social progress we’ve made decides to go back to a time where he would be forced to accept segregation and extreme gender inequality and rampant, blatant, gross racism of all sorts oh and more war and alkjdalksdhkas NO plus they broke their own time travel rules so like whatever i guess right?? it’s okay if steeb gets his stupid happy ending right? god is it SO MUCH TO ASK FOR JUST ONCE TO HAVE A GOOD CHARACTERIZATION OFCAP???? it’s not your fault cevans honey you’re doing amazing your directors just have no fucking idea 

tony

frankly this has been amongst rdj’s best performances of tony. i’m still partial to a lot of his acting in the iron man movies BUT this was FANTASTIC. him finally being allowed to absolutely go off on steve was fucking delicious and everything i was waiting for. let it all out tony baby. buuuuut we should have also had something more. i know my fellow tony stans typically don’t believe it but tony was wrong in civil war too. surprise they both fucking were. ANYWAY. i was waiting for an honest apology between them both. after everything they just went through, NONE of the petty bullshit they went through before matters at all. and yet the closest thing we get is tony just being like “turns out i don’t like to hold grudges” or what the fuck ever. why is it so hard just to make one of them say i’m sorry, the other say i’m sorry, admit it was a bunch of BULLSHIT hug it out and then go forward???? ugh. their choice to make tony suddenly care about his dad and be happy to see him???? disgusting. they made it canon that howard was an abuser, neglectful, cold, and hateful. it’s been a BIG DEAL how tony has struggled with the relationship to his dad because of how shitty the man was to him. and then they do tHAT? fuuuuCK that!!!! i’m not saying tony isn’t allowed to forgive howard. thats fine and expected tbh. but they pushed it way too far. the tony stark we’ve known for the last decade would never get all giddy and happy to see him and hug him and fucking thank him??? what the fuckk?? god that was gross. you know what we should have gotten? what tony deserved more than howard fucking stark? MARIA STARK!! and then, of course, my main issue. they fucking killed him. which only tells us, the audience and fans that no matter what you suffer and sacrifice that your only way to redemption is death. jesus fucking christ i am SO angry over this. they killed the two who suffered the fucking most. the two who every single goddamn day worked on being a better person. nat and tony both deserved so much better than waht they got. how the fuck did it make sense to kill tony who now has a fucking CHILD, who still has a future, who FINALLY FOR ONCE IN HIS FUCKING LIFE FOUND A SHRED OF PEACE????? and then let steve just go selfishly galavant through time as he pleases to have the cute happy ending? FUCK that ending. fuck it right up the ass with a huge unlubed cock. steve should have been the one to use the gauntlet. period. he should have been the one to die like that. i would have still fucking cried but you know what?? that would be the most cap thing ever. i wanted a mirror of pre-serum steve jumping on that grenade, but this time grabbing the gauntlet and not hesitating for a split second to snap. but no. they killed tony who left behind a wife who DESERVED MORE THAN HAVING THE MAN SHES LOVED AND SUPPORTED AND MARRIED AND HAS A CHILD WITH RIPPED AWAY FROM HER!!! tony who left behind a daughter too young to really comprehend yet why her daddy isn’t going to be coming back. fuck you russos. the injustice of it is astounding. i’m never going to get over it. you know how they could have killed tony? if they really felt like they needed to? have him grow old and die naturally of old age with pepper in their cute little lakeside house after watching morgan grow into such a strong and brilliant person. but oh. they gave that to steve. right.

stephen

i’ll never complain about having more stephen content but uhhhh i’m gonna complain that we didn’t get more than what we got cause after sitting in the soulworld for five fucking years you canNOT tell me he didn’t get even stronger with time to practice and meditate and work through every iota of information of mystical shit in his head. and yet they sidelined him??? after we’ve SEEN what he’s capable of in IW? just gonna put him on flood control???? something that any of those goddamn sorcerers could have done while he helps wipe the floor with thanos or any of the thousands of enemies? fuuuuuuuuuck that. can you fucking imagine how quickly thanos would have been taken out if it were wanda, carol, and stephen all three against him? jesus. he’s literally amongst the most powerful people but nah, just have him stand over there.

the gay russo

FUCK you for that. i am LIVID about it. yall can’t fucking make valkyrie bi???? or carol????? yall can’t GET AN ACTUAL GAY ACTOR? “ We felt it was important that one of us play him, to ensure the integrity and show it is so important to the filmmakers that one of us is representing that. “ WHAT????????? are you fucking telling me a WOC WHO IS OUT AS BISEXUAL AND WANTS HER CHARACTER TO BE BISEXUAL COULDNT ENSURE THE INTEGRITY OF AN LGBT CHARACTER???????????????? “ It is a perfect time, because one of the things that is compelling about the Marvel Universe moving forward is its focus on diversity.”  SEE PREVIOUS COMMENT????? oh my god fuck them forever.

lets make rules for our time travel then break them immediately

idek whats going on in the timeline anymore. they utterly fucked up and BROKE the timeline of 2012 avengers after letting loki get away with the tesseract. which should have cascaded into their future but, well, it didn’t. so i GUESS now we’re just pretending that made a new timeline which makes no goddamn sense but whatever i guess. steve going back to completely fuck with his timeline, or a timeline at least, and having no consequences in the future besides being old. okay. sure??? we can do all that but we can’t fucking get natasha back. right. cool. okay.

anyway i’m sure theres more bugging me but these are the things bothering me most.

and frankly i don’t care if anyone disagrees i’m not arguing or debating any of this. 

[cherrymoonvol6]

some avengers endgame Thoughts cause i saw the movie yesterday and can't stop thinking about it

of course..... spoilers ahead

nebula and tony playing!!!! i just love how nebula's personality comes through without it being ooc

also... nebula carefully sitting tony up. she Cares so much :(

steve immediately going to tony :( like im a stucky kind of gal but holy shit i love them

which was completely erased in the next scene where tony drags steve up and down and after that passes out, which is a confrontation Mood

i wonder how they made tony look so skinny and sick. if it was cgi then i applaud them cause it looked so good

the way they killed thanos so fucking quickly here... i don't know how to feel lmao. like cutting the gauntlet arm and then slicing his neck... that's what we were all screaming at them during infinity war. it's good to see them learn from their mistakes, i guess ?

(can't remember the order in which things happen from now so forgive me if i make a mistake)

i told my sister "that's one of the russos!!!!!" so it took me ten seconds to realize that the russo was the gay character everyone was talking about (i thought it would be fury for no other reason than it being shocking and fury having very little to do with the plot, but)

and steve being supportive of that :( man out of time said gay rights!

carol's new hair!! holy shit!!!!!

rocket insinuating carol has been experimenting with more hairstyles... i would like to see it

don't think i missed that carol x rhodey nod. i support it.

don't wanna say it now... for now ill just state: i love what they're doing with natasha in the movie. she truly feels like a friend to steve. like that small gesture of her sliding the plate towards steve is just so domestic and beautiful! it really makes her feel so human and complex at the end. i was so worried about her being wasted but i loved her throughout the film

it was a fucking rat who got scott out. i have to laugh.

also is that the guy from that old "gayyyyy" meme????

cassie is all grown up!!!!!! i can't even imagine how hard it had been for her

also what happened to her mom? and the stepdad??? are they fine????? i hope so

i was hoping we would get more tony as a dad in this movie and it delivered!! tony is so fucking good with kids. the bond between him and morgan was so well portrayed

also the place they live in is so cozy and that's what he deserves

when steve stepped down the car in that black outfit with the leather jacket on i gasped... he's fucking gorgeous

i kept wanting him and tony to kiss lmao tf is wrong with me

OKAY my hawkeye rights. i missed him so much

the stylish subtitles on the middle of the screen felt like too much. this isn't a tumblr gifset honey, just write them down!

thinking about the whole clintasha conversation really foreshadows the whole thing. natasha cares so deeply about clint and really puts his needs before hers. it's so beautiful to see

honestly... my clintasha rights!

i think the hulk/bruce scene was kinda endearing but then the ant man banter dragged on for toooo long

the dab i YELLED. these poor kids have to stand this man on 2023 pulling out 2016 trends to appear Hip and Cool

fat thor...... i hate how it was handled. hate it so fucking much.

new asgard! that's so cute. i hope that's on norway

miek and korg are alive!!!!

the thought of thor insulting a possibly 14 year old on fortnight is too much for me. it sounds like bad fanon talk. i still laughed (bc noobmaster69??? that's fucking hilarious)

tonys reaction to i love you 3000 is so beautiful. like the way he looks taken aback and so happy. i love irondad

steve in a white shirt and jeans!!!! i gasped again. he's delivering, the fucking model

i know they were like, barely being decent to each other again, but i still wanted my stony hug:(

when they're discussing their infinity stones memories and natasha and tony are laying down together on a table???? adorable. amazing.

also why tf didn't nebula said the soul stone required a sacrifice??? i thought that's what she got from gamora dying in volmir

as soon as natasha and clint arrived to volmir i began chanting "nonononononononono"

fuckkdjdksndk fucking nebula. cue to more nononono chanting

rhodey knocking out quill with a single hit is the funniest scene in the movie

clintasha calling on bullshit on the sacrifice thing was also quite funny

the forehead touch :((( im so weak! so sad!

clintasha literally fighting each other to be each other's sacrifice!!!! kill me now!!!!

jeez now i can finally say it: scarjo shined so fucking much on this movie!!!! her delivery was amazing, i really felt a connection between her and the avengers, it really showed her growth during the five year time jump. she fucking killed it. she did her best and she's the best black widow we could've ever gotten.

clint mourning her :((((( probably the third time i cried during the movie

thor's panic attack being used for cheap laughs was the most uncomfortable moment for me... or any scene where people only saw thor as Fat and Lazy (basically, two thirds of the movie)

the freya + thor reunion was so sweet though!

okay. okay. hear me out. tony was on a very serious mission to regain an infinity stone. and the first thing he does is check out steve's ass. and aknowledge how glorious it is. i couldn't believe what i was watching!!!!!! like that actually fucking happened. consider me a fully formed stony bitch.

and scott joining in to say it was "america's ass" ???? poetic cinema

so it's canon that everyone checks out steve's ass and appreciates it as a national treasure. that's all i never thought id needed.

steve saying "hail hydra" i YELLED. it was a nice nod to the whole "cap is a nazi" mess

and steve fighting himself... hot

using his bucky trauma to shock himself is :/// but also :((((

i loved that for one moment i knew everyone on the theatre was staring at steve's ass

and steve being appreciative of his own butt!!!! ok that's all i have to say about steve's ass

i loved the reminder that thor was still kinda goofy back in avengers 1, for everyone who says taika completely changed his character. and the little tony + thor moment was adorable

"howard..... potts" i can understand tony being a mess but how did howard not suspect of anything??? elevator lady took one look of steve's face and all of her alarms started ringing

peggy carter... ive missed my wife so much

did peggy marry souza. i hope she did. steve tf are you doing staring at a married woman (jk)

clint kicking the stones away as soon as bruce is done with the snap is the biggest mood

also... the hell was scott looking at that made him think it had worked? just... more birds outside? i was really curious

the irony of the only avenger without superpowers being left with the stones

"i know you" *hands out stones* how can you not love clint, he's so pure

nebula killing his 2014 self is a power move. that would be me if i met my 2014 self

thor with a braided beard!!!!! beautiful

thanos is like, a real threat and i love that

okay. i kinda saw it coming. i saw thor leave mjolnir behind and i thought "oh????". and then the shock of thanos being able to wield stormbreaker. and then fucking mjolnir moving!!!!! i was the only person in the theatre who yelled

but seriously!!!! steve wielding AND fighting with mjolnir!!!!! couldn't stop thinking about it all day!!!!!!!!! STEVE IS WORTHY!!!!!!!

parallels to thor going for the chest. it never works babies!

and just.... this was steve's moment. steve i-can-do-this-all-day rogers really fighting with every ounce of his body and soul against the most powerful being on earth. justice for him getting knocked after touching thanos for one second in iw!

and steve getting up again! all dirty and wounded!! trembling with exhaustuation and resolution!!! with his broken shield on his arm!!!! just him facing the biggest army of the universe!!!!! so powerful

sorry to destroy this epic moment, but like, okay. people had been reintegrated to life like, twenty minutes before. and i understand that they were all confused and out of place. but sam really needed ALL that time to just... try to communicate with steve????? ok

the "avengers..." *brings mjolnir with one hand while bracing his shield with the other* "assemble" moment was... oh my God. chills all over my body.

that One Moment where steve has stormbreaker on his hand... so fucking hot

the tony and peter reunion holy shit. the hug was everything i needed! like please just hug tony stark for ages

and tony and pepper fighting together!!! that's a power couple right there

i felt it when quill looked at gamora and just... stopped. im so sad his moment was played for laughs when it was obviously such an important moment for his character

thanos was so fucking scared of wanda that he put his own troops at risk to stop her for a little while. strongest avenger right there!

and carol coming back!!!! i was like

i felt so relieved at that point. i was like "yeah thanos is fucking over what's next"

no need to talk about all the women coming together to defend peter :')

thanos getting the gauntlet again... the nonono chanting came back

fucking CAROL trying to stop him. looking at him with such a determined face, like "you can't stop me from stopping you". it was so powerful he had to snatch one stone to stop her

and strange giving him the one finger to tony.... i knew what was coming holy shit. i knew it. they knew it.

tony really proved himself there. it was his best scene on the entire mcu, don't argue with me!!!!!! the way he stood there and took all the power of the stones, unmasked, unaffected, powerful and almighty

"i am... iron man" cue to ugly sobbing

tony knew there was no other way. pepper did, too... she knew exactly what she had to tell him. she was right. tony spent all of these years moved by selfishness first, then fear, then guilt. an endless battle since thanos was on his head. but the war was over. what mattered was that he saved everyone, and he sacrificed himself for everyone. a complete 180° from last movie's ending.... wow

gotta said... peter there felt a little bit out of place for me. i think it would've been more powerful if he didn't say anything, though peter is a teenager, i can get it

his arc with steve felt unfinished, too. i would've liked to see steve's reaction as well, since tony had told him he wanted everyone back and also for his family so survive. but whatever

im not against tony killing thanos instead of gamora and nebula but i would've liked if we saw them react to his death, at least:/ like a little parallel between nebula's reaction at the beginning and the end of endgame

the One stucky interaction here was pulled from cap1 and iw. i feel betrayed

bucky Knew what steve was going to do. i wonder if steve told him before or bucky just sensed it

you can't convince me steve would go back and carelessly dance with peggy knowing his friend is being used like a weapon by hydra and bound to kill tonys parents. nah nah. it all felt wrong

my steggy rights!!!

love that the russos foreshadowed cap!bucky on tws just to give the shield to sam at the end

anyways what the fuck bucky was all steve had but he lived the happiest life without it and left him alone on the 21st century? okay fuck y'all

[grumpycapt]

I’m with you till the end of the line, Avengers. I gathered for myself some thoughts after Avengers: Endgame so I might as well share them with you.

You know the deal, spoilers and random rambling under the cut

Let’s start with some Captian’s points:

First of all, CAP IS WORHTY and we knew all along and let me just tell you how powerful that was (whole cinema’s shouting and Thor’s cheering heck yeah)

Second of all, America’s ass. I almost stopped being mad for shaving his beard. So it’s almost forgiven so I’m just gonna leave this here.

Cap fighting Loki that is Cap is really comedy gold. That’s it.

Cap’s “civil” wardrobe. I hope that people taking care of that got paid really well cause it was a bloody well done job.

Hail Hydra. People went crazy when in the comics Cap turned out to be in Hydra and who thought Marvel would forget that wave of emotions. Oh, Marvel, how you can play with our sentiments so well I’m never gonna understand. 

And finally, Steggy ending. Total euphoria, my dream ending of all time and deep secret wishes coming true. As a hardcore Steggy fan since forever my heart is full. That’s what they deserved after saying final goodbye to each other and sacrificing everything.

General

I am Iron Man. That was it, that was the moment when the MCU’s Godfather, first superhero and heart shone fully. And I’m so glad he got to see his father as a loving person, to be a father (of an equally-cheesburger-loving precious gal) and a husband himself and then put on the gauntlet and save the fucking universe. I love you three thousand.

Thor’s part makes me stop rambling a bit because I feel fantastic and confused at the same time. On the one hand, it’s freaking good to see that he’s not hanging in some empty space- that he feels terrible thinking he failed, that he’s devastated cause he lost everything and everyone. Denial and depression is okay. I appreciate showin “lost” (in so many ways) character. And then, there is him being a God. After Ragnarok I had slightly higher expectations since he’s really the stringest Avenger nad I just hoped sth equally epic would happen to him but in a way I understand. 

Ant Man being precious as always, this time, with new space buddies. Give. Me. More. So happy to see it all good with Hope and Cassie. His time travel movie scenes kinda reminded me of Jake Peralta so it’s even better.

I love how they’re all laughing at the heist name and yet, here we are, having some hilariuos typically-heist movie scenes. Oh well :)

Korg in Taika’s pineapple shirt was everything. Thank you Russos.

I was so happy to see Clint in his game. After silent first Avengers and his absence in Infinity War it was refreshing to see him in real action. I also liked that they concentrated also on his relation with Natasha. Since I’m here, I must admit, she also shone especially as a leader! Damn she was good! She was vulnerable and strong, loving and firm. And when they were on their way to Vormir you could have felt what’s gonna happen. But at the same time, I don’t think I was ready to see it. The only regret is the Winter Soldier/Black Widow thread I wished to see. Also I kiiinda wish there would be a closure for Bucky/Steve, it was the relation around which a few movies were about. But the closure I wanted was supposed to be normal and y'know, friendly. No one left anyone, just living their life. Don't forget that they're two separate human beings, they don't have to live together forever and they can do whatever they want.

Movie sets a nice base for new Guardians of the Galaxy movie and Loki (being alive apparently?) and Winter Soldier/Falcon/Captain America? tv show so now it gets even more interesting.

Banner’s part was a little unexpected but I think it was a refreshing thing to see. He was either sad smol ½ sciences bro or furious Hulk. Here, he was kinda both but not really. Big plus: his relation with Thor, glad to see that after Ragnarok. 

FINAL BATTLE

I felt power. Everyone being there, I felt those 22 movies and 10 years. IT REALLY WAS COMICS-LIKE. That was really something and it really showed what a huge industry it is. 

I loved how they all were here. Alexander Pierce, Rumlow, Sidwell, Frigga, Jane Foster, Howard Stark, Peggy, Pym, Ancient One, Jarvis, Aunt May and all those characters thatactually piece together this whole hell of a story. This, and so many references, running jokes (strongest Avenger wink wink), easter eggs, literal quotes and small deatils (hey Queens was so brief and yet cute) made this experience 100000 times better. Those small things, like Steve’s group therapy taking place in the same room as Sam’s were, Spider-man’s killing mode (finally!) or Harley from IM3 at the funeral. 

Loose thoughts

Carol who - I kinda liked how she wasn’t the main fighter here. I was afraid that they’re gonna go the easy way “someone strnger came and she’s gonna kick Thanos’ ass just like that”. But also, her scenes were fanstastic.

Peter and Tony hug - I really waited for that. Stupid, but this relation was crazy-entertaining

Proof that Tony Stark had a heart - that’s it, I’m done

Girls power - oh hell yeah, that’s what I’m talking about. Sad that we couldn;t see Widow in that group since she’s Marvel’s first female hero but still, empowering!

Valkyrie being a leader - other people see it as surprising, I feel like she grew up to that. She can still be a horse-flying drunk fighter but when people needed it, she took matters into her own hands. She was there when Thor was absent.  

Time jumping scenes were such a pleasure. Hulk hating stairs, Quill singing, Frigga scene, so many gems.

Pepper in a suit, that’s a new one!

Finally

The movie was so gratifying. It was bittersweet but perfect; it’s good to feel that it was worth it. We got a closure we deserved. It’s a wonderful reward and I felt appreciated as a viewer who spent x hours at the cinema, who was waiting for those post credit 30 seconds scenes, who got attached to some characters, who rewatched movies numerous times to be sure that every detail was noticed. It’s good to feel that way and participating in that huge cinema experience from the early years really makes me feel like it paid off now. Not that it matters, but all of this makes this whole thing even more perfect. What a ride.

AVENGERS ASSEMBLE

 *gotta add sth more tomorrow

[skywalkersapprentice]

so when I saw infinity war the second time, i brought a pen and a notebook with me and took notes in the dark the whole time. for my second endgame viewing yesterday, i did the same. i now present to you my Thoughts About Endgame. (this is. long.) 

Major Spoilers Ahead.

okay seriously, nobody called clint up when there was a giant invasion in wakanda??? nobody???

also it was daytime in wakanda when the snap happened. it’s also daytime wherever clint is in america when the snap happens. someone explain.

god the dawning panic when clint realizes his family is gone. that whole scene is so empty and unsettling, it was shot really well

i automatically associate 80s music with space thanks to marvel. 

tony stark adopting strays everywhere he goes since 2013.... i love this about him

nebula finally got to win something!!!! “it was fun.”

and then she gives him their final ration. i’m- :((((

back on earth..... thank god the beard is gone.

“I lost the kid” tony’s face wow that’s devastating, no thanks

“Is um...” what was tony going to say after that??

“I thought you were a build-a-bear.” “Maybe I am.” fuckign.... tony please sdfgdfg

“And I needed you.” tony :(((

“No trust. Liar.” this entire scene is just. chilling. heartbreaking. tony has nothing left for anyone, and especially nothing left for steve, except-

him ripping the metaphorical heart out of his chest and handing it to steve made me literally gasp the first time i watched this film. i feel like it hasn’t been talked about enough, but it’s incredibly poetic.

“where are you going?” “to kill thanos” i haven’t seen captain marvel but i’m already in love with carol danvers

and now they have hope, they still think they can bring everyone back... what a dangerous thing

suddenly steve is looking at his locket of peggy all the time.starting in this film only. can we let him grieve for his actual friends?? you know, the ones he just lost? does he even mention sam or bucky in the entire film?  alright russos, i have several bones to pick with you about this, but alright....

i gotta say, when i first watched this i was astounded that thanos destroyed the stones and then got beheaded in the first twenty minutes. it really left me wondering, well- what now? and that was exciting.

five years later. i mean, we knew there would be a time jump, but i wasn’t expecting this.

we’re really calling this cameo by russo representation huh

lol

and like??? steve brings up nobody he lost in the snap, instead chosing to focus on “the love of his life” that he met and lost in 1945. this struck me as odd the first time i watched and now i’m like. man they’re really trying 2 justify their later decision, huh

so they’re calling those who were snapped “The Vanished” according to the sanfran memorial

avengers r still a thing and their complex has actually grown in size?? who is funding this. is it tony

my next note just says HAIR SDFDSDFG aka heLLO carol danvers

nat :((((

crying and eating a sandwich is a mood

god. the quiet grief

natasha romanoff has come such a long way from her introduction in iron man 2. she cries freely, loves her family, actively wants to be a better person, even if a lot of her family isn’t around today. i just- love her so much.

“we both need to get a life.” “you first.” goddamnit

i.... love happy, peaceful, good dad Tony Stark, so much.

“define lunch or be disintegrated” morgan h stark is so cute

“you like going in the garage, huh? so does daddy.” tony was already so proud of her god i just :((((

me, zooming in on nat: ARROW NECKLACE

does she only wear that when she’s missing clint, or

I’m truly in my feelings about Tony being The Best Dad

Bruce apparently spent 18 months in a gamma lab, which is interesting.

god the scene with the kids asking for a selfie was so cringe are you telling me they could include this but steve couldn’t mourn for his friends

tony does dishes now. a true housedad.

that’s!!!! his first son!!!!!! :((((((

can you believe it was peter parker who pushed tony to invent time travel

“i’ve got something on my mind.” “is it juice pops?” i’m just thinking now about how howard most definitely would have sent tony straight to bed, but tony lets morgan stay up and eat juice pops with him. this is just. straight up great content.  

“I love you 3000″ can you just. his face when she says that. also i’m never getting over that phrase ever

“I can stop,” Tony says, on the brink of inventing time travel.

“But would you be able to rest?” says Pepper, who has been trying and failing to get him to stop for a good 15 years.

the parallels between this and her last words to tony. ouch.

this is such a good and steady relationship now :(.

sdfgfdfg why is steve dressing like he’s from the 40s again is this a visual sign of his regression

god they did thor so dirty in this film. not with his character- him falling into great depression and having ptsd is not a bad thing, but treating it like a joke is. the audience is invited to laugh at him. Bad.

thor threatening “noobmaster69″ over the headset for his rock friend is very funny though.

hey tokyo looks alright compared to a lot of america.

every single clintasha scene in this film kills the man.

also everyone knows thanos’s name. i assume that means the world knows why everyone disappeared.

“you’re only a genius on earth” yeah but who invented time travel, rocket

rhodey wanting to straight up murder baby thanos is hilarious

the explanations of time travel in this film give me a headache

“TIME HEIST BRAINSTORMING SESSION”

bruce, nat and tony all laying around throwing ideas back and forth.... this movie is valid sometimes

“see you in a minute,” natasha says, and she’s smiling.

this is her family you guys :(((((

NEW YORK 2012

MY FAVOURITE SCENE

omg bruce making such a halfhearted attempt at smashing things please i love

okay cut to 2013 Asgard, and Thor sneaks right by his currently dead brother without even looking at him. this movie confuses me

fuck the scene where rocket slaps thor for having a panic attack. i’m glad thor ended up abandoning him.

okay so everything important happens between 2012-2014

cap/tony/scott, clintasha, nebula/rhodey.... these are such ideal teamups

“we’re a long way from budapest” give me my clintasha movie, marvel!!!

okay back in 2012, HOW did JARVIS not register the fact that there were two steves and two tonys in Stark Tower

god this entire scene is fucking hilarious the entire mcu was worth everything for the 2012 time travel scene

fuckign.... loki

ELEVATOR SCENE

as a cap 2 stan i feel so validated

HA IL HYDRA

WHEN I SAY I GASPED IN DELIGHT

CAP VS CAP

“I CAN DO THIS ALL DAY”

“YEAH, I KNOW, I KNOW”

sadfgfdfg are u really telling me that cap takes the peggy locket everywhere

BUCKY IS ALIVE

THAT IS AMERICAS ASS SDFGFSDF PLEASE

2012 avengers best avengers

meanwhile the sorcerer lady is giving bruce a time travel lesson and i didn’t understand any of it but basically each reality requires six stones in order to not be torn apart by the forces of darkness? ??

I’m just glad thor got some kind of closure by talking to his mom

side note you can definitely tell that frigga raised loki

“EAT A SALAD”

“i’m still worthy” asdfgfdf yeah but now this timeline thor has no hammer!!!

QUILL SDFGFDSDFGHFDS

this movie is so entertaining

i live for nebula and rhodey just judging everyone

so do the guardians just.... not happen in the 2014 timeline?

gamora is ready to Fight thanos when the maw threatens nebula

was that young alexander pierce headed underground in 1970?

bone 2 pick with this whole time travel thing

thor got closure by talking to his mom

tony got closure by talking to his dad

steve saw peggy working, successful and thriving, through a window. closure where????

he should have gotten a chance to talk to her and received closure that way.

hank pym is an asshole but i guess we already knew that

“my wife is expecting” so tony was born 1970/1971 ig

howard’s dad beat him with a belt. i suppose every stark does a little better parenting-wise

Jarvis!!!!!!! agent carter is canon!!!!

vormir oh god here we go

“under different circumstances, this would be totally awesome” i’m inclined to agree with clint

this part goddamit

handholding :((((

my next note just says “aveng ers 1 paralels fu k”

the way this was filmed was beautiful. the colours, the lighting, the acting, the dialogue, the parallels to the first clintasha fight in avengers 1..... if natasha had to die, this was.... a good death, i think.

“damn you!”

“it’s okay.”

clint is begging her this hurts so much :(((

god. tears.

clint just sobbing in the water with the soul stone in his hand hits some kind of way

where is natasha’s funeral, huh??? why does steve shed like one (1) tear?

also why does the gauntlet need to physically be snapped like what does that dO

i just realized that thor’s fake eye is amber.

Infinity Stones:

almost killed thanos after 2 uses

destroyed bruce’s arm

killed tony

imagine an alternate scene where all six original avengers survived until this point and all of them held one stone as they snapped thanos’s army out of existence. that would have been the ultimate fanservice and i would have astral projected. anyway we’re getting off topic

“don’t change anything from the last five years.” what tony means is “please don’t erase my daughter”.

SNAP

yay they did it except-

how did everyone survive thanos blowing up the avengers compound

2014 gamora sounds just- slightly different than 2018 gamora. a little harsher. the guardians haven’t yet softened her edges.

“we become sisters” and suddenly gamora has hope

i- did that lightning just braid thor’s hair sdfgdsdfgh

this is a harsher thanos. thanos who died in 2018 had been changed. weakened, maybe.

thor, cap and tony fought in avengers one. now, they’re fighting thanos together.

l just. love that clint has a sword now.

“he won’t let me” nebula.... :(((((( and she dies crying

i have a note here that says “thor’s lightning + tony = c o o l”

STEVE WITH MJOLNIR

ASDFGFSDF FUCK THIS WAS WORTH EVERYTHING MARVEL HAS EVER PUT ME THROUGH

LIGHTNING POWERS

i LIVE

oooh it’s personal for thanos now

ON

YOUR

LEFT

the portals scene fUCK

this is just. worth it. on every level.

PETER AND TONY

“this is nice” please :((((((

poor peter quill gets snapped, gamora’s loss fresh in his mind, then he thinks he’s gotten her back and she’s not the gamora he knew. ouch.

tell me why everyone but steve gets a reunion scene lol

peter introducing himself to everyone!!!! he’s so sweet.

CAPTAIN MARVEL HAS ARRIVED

i’m gay. oh my god.

hhhhgn hair

GIRLS

this is fanservice!!! as in, i am a fan and i feel fuckign SERVICED

thor duel welding mjolnir and stormbreaker is AWESOME.

strange holds up one finger. tony gives a look of heartbreaking acceptance.

god. tony stark, you brave, brave man. he knew he wasn’t going to survive this one.

“I am inevitable.”

“I. am. Iron Man.”

SNAP (2)

you lose, thanos.

but also, i lose, because oh god tony.

peter :(((

“Mr Stark!”

“Sir!!”

“Tony!!”

oh. fuck.

“you can rest now” do you SEE the parallels to the earlier conversation between tony and pepper :(((

the arc reactor going out physically broke me

i didn’t take many notes after this because i was literally sobbing lol

“I love you 3000″ stabs me again

“proof that tony stark has a heart” yes well my heart is breaking

happy :((( is morgan’s jarvis :(((((

Queen!!!! Valkyrie!!!

this dick measuring contest between Quill and Thor got old five hours of content ago.

:))))) rage time :))))))

bruce tried to bring back nat with the snap :(((

oh god bucky.

his face!!!!! his voice!!!! he’s trying to be strong and find but he looks dead inside

i just- fuck. he knew and he let steve go.

why did he show up on that bench i don’t understand

“I’m happy for you” are you telling me sam wasn’t the least bit hurt or mad

the ONLY good thing about this is Captain Sam

fuck steve tho

what year is this dance in

i mean. it’s sweet. but this is not steve.

I think i’ve talked enough about my dislike of the direction steve’s character went in in this film. that was the major point of dislike for me, but given that the council has made a stupid ass decision i’ve elected to ignore it. i understand that both tony and steve had to make their exist from the franchise here, but.... there were better ways to go about that. 

i think a few different relationships slipped through the cracks here- characters suddenly grieving people they haven’t seen in /years/ and completely ignoring others who only recently died was a big one for me. but other characters saw a lot of development- nebula was a favourite of mine in this film, which i was not expecting! she and rhodey made a really good team- i feel like they understand one another. 

the Original Six all saw a decent amount of screen time, which i appreciated. nobody got left behind there. there were so many references to other films that i know i didn’t catch them all, but it really made this movie seem like a love letter to the fans. 

i want to make it clear that i actually loved most of this film. i think it was a good send off for the avengers and i love a good time travel plot (like, it’s one of my all-time favourite tropes. i was vibrating with excitement in the theater during the 2012 scenes.) i went in expecting a lot of the emotion to be sidelined in favor of plot and action, and while that happened a little bit, i was overall pleasantly surprised with the amount of emotion that they fit into this film. characterization and emotion is perhaps even more important to me than a good plot, and this film got the emotion down.

 it’s definitely not a perfect film but it could have been so much worse, so i’m grateful that we got a good sendoff for the avengers.

7/10. 

[girlbookwrm]

BUG THEMED SUPERHERO MOVIE NO. 1

THE MIGHTY PRE-ENDGAME REWATCH CONTINUED

at the top of my notes for this it just says “JULY 17 2015″ underlined like four times. i don’t know what that means. what are you trying to say, past me? what are you trying to tell me??

anyway

This movie had a troubled youth. I literally cannot go into how troubled the youth of this film was it was that troubled. It’s like the bubble child of a disaster family. You meet this nice normal kid and then gradually you learn that the parents got divorced and then murdered each other and also all the siblings are in prison.

anyway moving on

TRISKELION! REMEMBER? FROM THAT MOVIE YOU REALLY LIKED??

digitally enyouthened michael douglas vs practically enagened hayley atwell

oh hey Other Howard

you haven’t long to live, FYI

ONE LAST GASP FROM THE BEST MARVEL LOGO

you shall be missed

this unexpected but very on point commentary on the US prison system is Most Welcome.

thank god it’s baskin robbins it could be so much worse, frankly

sooooooo

paul rudd’s immortal, right?

i mean we’re all agreed on that

that’s not even a real question

Baskin-Robbins always knows

this is a wild cut though

“Yes. I’m still alive.”

Evangeline Lilly’s bob is CRUSHING IT

this film montage is SO EXTRA???

literally the only reason Steve Rogers isn’t rolling in his grave is because he’s nnnNOT DEAD

my freedom senses are tingling.

tingling with rage

Hope’s Bitch Please face is the Bitch Pleasiest.

I love this family dynamic so so so much

it’s complex but also so loaded with genuine love and affection? 

wholesome content? in MY mcu? IT’S MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK

tho they do talk about him like he led a life of crime

he has a master’s

he broke the law one (1) time. right??

this is the creepiest thing Cross does

YOU DON’T JUST SNEAK UP ON PEOPLE IN THE TOILET DARREN

THAT’S GROSS AND WEIRD.

oh yeah and he turns this guy into goo

at least he washes his hands?

This whole thing would be really weird if you didn’t know the Pym Particle drives you crazy

The Roommate: IT DOES WHAT NOW?

(for those who don’t know, my understanding is that prolonged exposure to the the Pym Particle gives you rage issues and that was how the comics dealt with the fact that Hank Pym slapped janet around)

yes

comics are extremely yikes

it is known

“you deserve everything coming your way”

LUIS IS A HERO

A HERO

Scottothy Langward Lang

how are you this agile

HWY

I do really like the music, and apparently it’s in 7/4 time? Which is a DEMON tempo we spent a solid minute conducting along with it and yeah what the hell who wrote this they were a genius

Scotty how many people have you actually robbed? you’re. kind of good at this.

This is all extremely edgar wright

this whole movie is a bit like watching spot the edgar wright

where actually did he get the liquid nitrogen tho

oh hank

scott

scotty

scottothy

why are  you putting on the suit

The Roommate: this hits a lot of nope buttons for me: bugs, dust particles, being loud, rats in walls...

Me: You don’t like it do ya

The Roommate: I Do Not.

THIS is very Edgar Wright

FRIGGING CASSIE, MAN.

FRIGGING CASSIE

“I think... we should call the Avengers” Iconic

“That’s how you punch” Biconic

query: Are Crazy Ants Native?

THAT IS RUDE

“do i have a hill’s worth of ants?”

Sultry Garden Gnome: ddddDO I????

“think about cassie”

how

why

this makes no sense

why does it work

WHY is Scott here? Why Are You Talking About This With Scott Here? HE CANNOT LEAVE??

i weirdly like his old man space glasses

“I was trying to protect you” FROM WHAT??? SHE ALREADY KNOWS HER MOM IS DEAD ALL YOU’RE PROTECTING HER FROM IS THE FACT THAT HER MOM DIED A HERO???

How many days has this been by the way

don’t like this

don’t like that

It’s the FUCKING FALCON he’s SO BEAUTIFUL??

“it’s really important to me that Cap never finds out about this”

i love him so much?

thinking more about the pym particle makin ya crazy wouldn’t it have been a wild twist if Hank were evil?

darren y r u dressed like an undercover nazi

is it because ur an undercover nazi?

it just says “wombats?” here

i don’t? know why?

i really should’ve typed this up earlier

you gave them half of WHOSE xanax? is this how opioid crises start?

CASSIE IS A BOSS ASS BITCH WHO SLEEPS WITH EVERY SINGLE LIGHT ON AW YE

It’s impressive, what he does with the ants

but i don’t like it

nope. no thank you.

“going to the secondary location”

superhero landing

No Ant Left Behind

I’m actually surprised this looks so good, given the givens

the givens being that because they accelerated Ant Man’s release date the special effects team was SUUUUUUPER rushed.

tbf ants coming at you like that? It Is A Nightmare

why’d ya wipe the hard drives if you were gonna implodinate the building?

the comedy in flipping between small and large is just *kissy chef fingers*

It’s funny every time

but her room is gonna be FULL OF DEAD ANTS

i don’t like that

YIKES

I DON’T LIKE THAT

A Water Bear!!

The Wasp!!!

So there’s some kind of emotional/mental bond there? I don’t fly the arrow with my head that kind of thing?

But God This Family tho

POOTER!!

...

“... he said yes.”

[dontcallmecarrie]

By Myself But Not Alone

Another day, another test, another fic-idea-that-won’t-leave-me-alone. Specifically: time-travel fixits are really fun to see, but there’s a few takes on it that’ve stuck with me throughout the years, across fandoms. Even more specifically: ones where it’s not just one person waking up in the past, but several, and not always in the same place. Add in my weird mood where anything I touch turns to not-crack, plus glimpsing some Infinity Wars spoilers despite not being caught up, and ta-da! [Aka oops, I did it again.]

Heads up for quite a bit of angst, possible shippiness [depends on the version], and unapologetic canon-dropped-the-ball-on-Tony stance.  Title from Metallica’s ‘Wherever I May Roam’.

So, AU where, for whatever reason, people in the MCU after a certain point wake up in the past. 

Kicker being, it’s pretty damn scattershot from there; Steve’s memories kick in when he first sees Times Square after waking up from the ice, Natasha’s mid-mission somewhere in Bangladesh when she realizes some of her fellow operatives are probably. HYDRA and she can’t do a thing about it, Thor’s just seen his brother fall from the Bifrost and he’s alarming his parents because he’s acting even stranger than usual in his grief. Bucky wakes up after falling from the train, sees where he is, and goes “oh hells no” and promptly fucking off to Wakanda because even if they’re mistrustful of outsiders and will be for decades, between what he’s managed to pick up on the language, and his skills, there’s probably something he can do to help out, right? [Between long naps, anyway...or maybe he just goes full-on ninja instead, idk] Fury’s mid-conversation with Maria Hill in HQ when they both go “oh fuck what year is it” and the list just goes on. 

At first, everyone’s assuming they’re the only ones who traveled back, and they set out to fix things even as they’re reeling because hello, old friend who I haven’t seen in years since your painful death, how are you?

The more time goes on, though, the more everyone realizes they’re not the only ones running around, and the fact that people’re arriving at different points in time means it is a headache. Was AIM running around this early, last time? When the fuck was the Winter Soldier a mercenary and not the fist of HYDRA? What do you mean he’s infamous for his bodyguarding contracts and not assassinations?! Wait, you mean Howard Stark’s still alive?

On the plus side, after a while they realize the time travel thing’s not a one-off. The more time passes, the more people start to remember. [They’ve got a support group going by the time Steve remembers.]

Cue tearful reunions, feat. “oh god I didn’t think I was going to see you again” and “oh thank fuck I’m not the only one”. Everyone who remembers starts to put their heads together, sorting out their timeline to fix things without tripping over each other, to figure out what they can and can’t fix.

It’s not all sunshine and roses, though; Bucky punched Steve after the ‘yeah, I didn’t tell Tony about who actually killed his parents thing’ after it comes up, and he’s not the only one judging him hard afterwards and he resolves to fix it because he really is sorry. But hey, this is a whole new world, one where SHIELD never got corrupted, where the Winter Soldier is just a handle Bucky uses instead of decades’ worth of HYDRA conditioning. In many ways, it’s almost a vacation; seeing and reconnecting with loved ones, especially given the clusterfuck that happened in their original timeline.

...however. This is a whole new world, and that’s not necessarily always a good thing. Like, sure, there’s quite a few things that’re better here, but. 

Thanos is still coming, and due to the butterfly effect, there’s a whole slew of new guys that hadn’t come up in their timeline, like MODOK, like Crimson Widow, grad students they should keep an eye on because this Richards kid was going places and so was his friend, Victor von-something. Stark Industries is still selling weapons by the bucketload, since Howard Stark’s an unapologetic war hawk, has been since the Manhattan Project. But the biggest problem? 

It’s 2008, and Tony Stark has yet to make an appearance. Not in a way that matters, at least, to the people who remember him from another life.

———————

okay, from here I can see this going several ways:

[under the cut because this got long and RIP mobile users otherwise]

the super-angsty break-it-even-more version:

Warning: this one’s got suicidal thoughts leading to Major Character Death. Also, vaguely shippy, with possible Stephen/Tony.

Tony’s last coherent memories are of the bomb with his name on it, when it hits. Suddenly, it’s not just his past flashing before his eyes, but his future as well—years’ worth of memories, of trauma after trauma with next to no support whatsoever because the world did its best to break him—and...in that instant, he’s tired. 

He’s so, so tired, and he sees the road ahead and the idea of having to do that all over again is just. Too much. He knows the agony that follows, and knows that he was lucky to have survived a bomb to the chest last [this?] time, and...even if he’s terrified at the prospect of Thanos coming, he just. Can’t. 

He can’t, anymore, he’d barely managed to pull through last time, asking him to do it all over again was too much—and, seeing the bomb with his literal name on it, Tony sees an out. 

The world’s better off without him in it, anyway.

—

Everyone is shocked and dismayed, when the reports come in. Tony Stark never came back from Afghanistan, and there is a lot of grief to go around, in the time that follows. The world mourns a prodigy; the people that remember Iron Man, remember Tony, mourn a good man who they never really had the chance to meet. 

Fury in particular’s very, very quiet, after hearing the reports come in; he’s lost good people before, but...he’d seen Tony grow up, what with him being the kid of one of the founders of SHIELD and all. He’d seen the potential, seen it realized, seen just what kind of force for good he was—so when he hears the reports come in, he feels every single one of his years weigh down on him in a way they hadn’t before. It takes slightly longer than normal, pull himself together, to focus on how this latest development’d affect things now that they were minus a heavy hitter [in more ways than one].

Steve, meanwhile, is inconsolable. He’d had his regrets, had been working on fixing them, and one the biggest ones had been with Tony. He’d never had the chance to set the record straight, never had the chance to apologize—and now, he never will.  

Tony’s loss ia a huge blow, to those who remember Iron Man. 

Especially the more time goes on, and the impact of what could have done are felt: it’s in the scandal that erupts, when the VP of Stark Industries is caught double-dealing, it’s in the incredibly tense sociopolitical climate that follows because even if they’ve done their best to fix things, nobody’s around to privatize world peace. It’s in the recklessness the new Spider-Man’s actions, after Peter remembers—pushing himself so, so hard, trying to save everyone the same way his mentor once had him.

...it’s also in the questions everyone has, after Thanos rocks up and apart from the Avengers, there’s a goddamn robot army flying out to wage  war because apparently Tony’s AI were a bit more Skynet than anyone had expected. Or, actually, no—more sentient than expected, and wasn’t that a kick in pants, that JARVIS remembered not only his but Vision’s experiences as well, after hearing about Tony’s death?

wait, no. Too angsty, here, have a fixit.

Dr. Stephen Strange wakes up right after his first fight with the followers of Dormammu, and the Ancient One and Mordo are more than slightly worried when he looks like he’s about to cry when he sees them afterwards. Even more worried, once they check for magic, and the following conversation gives them all a migraine because they’re still not quite sure what sent him back in time, and that the Eye of Agamotto seems to have taken a liking to him only complicates things even further.

When he hears of Tony’s death, well...he doesn’t take it well. Specifically, after finding out he’s not the only one who remembers Tony from a different world, there’s a bit of yelling, and him storming out afterwards in grief.

To sum up: his emotional state after getting wind of it’s more volatile than anything else, which, as it turns out, makes for some interesting results when you’re the Time Stone’s favorite person. 

Specifically, Stephen opened a portal intending to go the Sanctum to mourn in privacy, how the fuck he ended up in the middle of a desert, he doesn’t know. How the fuck he ended up right by the same outcropping as Tony did the moment the bomb landed not ten feet from them, he doesn’t know but isn’t about to question. He just sees Tony’s face—fear shifting to shock shifting to remembering shifting to despair—realizes what’s about to happen, and grabs Tony as he immediately makes a portal back to the Sanctum. 

Cue even more headaches. The Ancient One, Mordo, and Wong are not amused by how fast and loose they’ve been messing with the timestream, and that the Eye is showing blatant favoritism doesn’t help. At all. 

On the plus side,  they’re also able to table that in favor of helping the shell-shocked guy who’s like a breeze from having a nervous breakdown. Cue therapy. Lots of therapy. Also, the ‘oops we accidentally faked your death’ reveal, what with the time travel thing, which then leads to some reunions because Tony could go a lifetime without seeing Steve again but he hasn’t heard JARVIS in years. 

...is this a shatterpoint of  a fic idea? Can’t tell anymore.

The more-bittersweet-than-anything-else version:

also slightly shippy, only it’s Steve/Tony here instead.

Everyone remembers. Everyone, but Tony.

They keep as close an eye on him as they can, given that JARVIS’ pretty paranoid about hacking and they’d have to go through Pepper to actually see. him. But they manage, even if it’s pretty tricky before Afghanistan.

Fury’s the  most straightforward; he’s shameless  about  using his connections to get an excuse to see how Tony’s doing, and Tony remembers seeing him around the mansion with Howard as a kid often enough to let it slide. [Especially  since SHIELD’s also buying quite a few guns for their personnel, there’s that, too.] 

After Afghanistan, the rest of them start to trickle in, similar to canon. 

Here, however, the dynamics are a lot kinder, a lot less terse. No thinly-veiled threats, no blackmail; when Tony returns after his ‘I Am Iron Man’ press conference, it’s because JARVIS remembers and Fury managed to convince him that he’s genuinely trying to do better this tine. Howard’s notes and old stuff get shipped over as soon as Phil Coulson can come with an excuse for it, because palladium poisoning is just...no. 

...you get the idea. Canon ensues, and Tony’s doing his thing, kicking ass, taking names, and trying to make the world a better place. Except here, everyone who remembers is seeing him in a way they hadn’t really, before, and treating him differently because of it. 

Tony picks up on it pretty fast—kinda hard not to, considering everything.  There’s an element of regret he sees some people, sometimes, but he doesn’t know why and it is baffling. Not only that, but...it’s almost like they know him? Almost like they can see pasts his masks? Weird.

Meanwhile everyone else’s low-key expecting Tony to remember any day no, but no dice. Kind of a bummer. Oh, sure, Pepper and Rhodey’ll give him all the hugs regardless, but still. Also, Steve wants to get some things off his. chest, and this Tony’s both so similar and so different to his, it’s almost painful.

Time goes on, canon ensues, only this time, a lot of missed opportunities are taken. 

Bruce sees the way Tony tentatively reaches out and listens, Steve calls him  when he gives him his number, Thor returns earlier, and the list just goes on. [...aka all the self-indulgence. All of it.] There’s a lot of impromptu hugs that Tony’s still very confused by, and strange looks, but...these people care, for some reason. It’s weird, but...he likes it. 

More and more people show up,  and it’s the same thing: he clicks with Strange almost as fast as he did with Bruce, although Peter’s hero-worship is still something that takes a while to get used to. 

Even if he sometimes feels like they’re seeing someone else when they look at him, but that can’t be right, can it? Well, fortunately that feeling goes away after a while, but still. It was weird while it lasted.

Tony doesn't remember because of Reasons. Maybe he repressed said memories because of the trauma, maybe that part of him was just too tired to make the trip, idk, you decide.

[cap-ironman]

2016 Cap-Ironman Holiday Exchange Creator Reveals and Masterpost!

It's time for the creator reveals for the 2016 Cap-Iron Man Holiday Exchange! Here is the full masterlist of the event--all 89 fanworks created for it! Thank you all for participating :)

Ooops? by Themisto for monkiainen (MCU, Art) NSFW - Steve and Tony accidentally time travel in the future and.... Never Eye To Eye by vorkosigan for mrsgingles (MCU, 26,503 Words) After the Civil War, the Avengers were back together. How is everything going, Tony? Pepper had asked in her email. It's fine (Tony had written back). I'm fighting with Steve all the time. Everything is going to hell. I'm okay (you know I'm always okay). (Or: How Tony and Steve learned to be a bit gentler with each other) Le Ciel Attendra by antigrav_vector for gottalovev (MCU, 8,317 Words) The 3rd war against the Chitauri is well underway and Captain Steve Rogers is not overly pleased when Governor Fury throws a wrench into the works. He and his team are a well-oiled machine and they don't need anyone else working with them. Not to mention that now is possibly the worst possible time to start breaking in new team members. When Steve meets said team members, it gets even worse. absence makes the heart by fantalaimon for adarksweetness (chayaasi) (Marvel, 4,835 Words) “One night,” Tony says, and just flies himself bodily into one of the canary yellow beekeepers like a red and gold battering ram. “I ask for one measly night. One single goddamn night with my boyfriend—” “Oh, is the boyfriend label on now?” Clint asks over the comms. When The Machines Take Over by monkiainen for MusicalLuna (MCU, 2,287 Words) In a world where some people have the names of their soulmates written on their forearms, Steve is terrified of ever meeting his. There is something really wrong about him, he thinks. A Shortcut to Happiness by Fluffypanda for AetherSprite (MCU, 1,921 Words) Tony teaches Steve to dance. Accidential Romance by navaan for Steel_Wings (616, 2,247 Words) Tony doesn’t know much of anything anymore, but some things seem obvious I don't think you want me by afincf_tirwer for MissRomanceJunkie (MCU, 2,808 Words) When Steve becomes jealous at a charity ball what does this mean for his and Tony's relationship? Will it develop further or will it crumble around them? A Tree in Rockefeller Center [ART] by MassiveSpaceWren for MiniRaven (MCU, Art) ART for the fic "A Tree in Rockefeller Center" by Miniraven! "Steve is a tree spirit of a hundred year old pine tree and Tony Stark is a teenager studying at MIT. Tony feels that there’s something more to their relationship besides a strong friendship between a human and a tree spirit, but Steve won’t cross the line. Might have something to do with the fact that Steve’s the Rockefeller Christmas tree and is going to be cut up for parts come mid-January to be used to build houses for the poor. Yeah... Merry fucking Christmas to you too universe. Now if only Tony could do something to change the tides of fate…" A Little Travel is Good for the Soul by cptxrogers for Cap Iron Man Community (MCU/AA, 1,498 Words) Tony was not expecting angry, argumentative versions of himself and Steve to appear in his living room one day. But now they're here, he's sure that he and Steve can help them work through their issues together. MCU Steve and Tony travel to the Avengers Assemble universe and meet their counterparts. Elevator Going Down by cptxrogers for Cap Iron Man Community (Heroes United, 1,390 Words) An alternative version of that elevator scene from Iron Man and Captain America: Heroes United. The Collection by Sineala for jiokra (Marvel 616, 4723 words) In the early days of the Avengers, Steve finds out about Tony's Captain America memorabilia collection -- and much, much later, Tony tries to give a piece of it back to him. Sick Day by kikijpn1121 for Notoyax17 (MCU, art) Steve needs to make Tony stay in the bed. Really. Minutes to Midnight by Woad for laireshi (Marvel 616, 3257 words) The Illuminati wipe Tony's memories instead of Steve's. Wished On The Moon For You by jiokra for Captain_Al (Marvel 616, 4301 words) Since the CPR incident in the Red Zone, Steve and Tony have been avoiding each other. The Avengers hope to rectify the situation by booking them a cabin in the wilderness, a couple's retreat since it's cheaper. They've been successfully avoiding each other despite the cramped corners until Steve's werewolf form seeks Tony out on the night of a full moon. Object Permanence by Arukou for Meatball42 (MCU, 6248 words) Natasha and Steve have been good together, but Natasha knows there are better matches out there than her, and she also knows that Steve's had a crush on Tony for longer than they've been sleeping together. It's for the best, really, that she bring them together. Cap's Challenge by Mushroom for kikijpn1121 (EMH, comic) EMH: Possessive Steve Half Doomed and Semi-Sweet by mitochondrials for alphatabris (MCU, 1811 words) Cooperate Meetings are one thing (insert, Hell). A scheduled Meeting with Nick Fury, director of Tony Stark's least favorite cooperation of Spies? Talk about taking a left turn. Octopus's Garden by antigrav_vector for Cap-Iron Man Community (Marvel Noir, 7838 words) Tony's on the hunt for some treasure he's heard can be found on the sea floor in the reasonably shallow waters of the Caribbean. It's high summer, and the waters are warm. A squall blows up, thanks to the hurricane far to the south, and suddenly they're in trouble. Pepper and Jarvis manage to get away in the boat, but Tony's thrown overboard by a wave that hits them, broadside. It knocks him unconscious. When he wakes -- and he's amazed that he does -- he gets the surprise of a lifetime. Tony Stark and the Artifact of the Hawai'ian Archipelago by antigrav_vector for Cap-Iron Man Community (Marvel Noir, 18979 words) Tony's on a solo flight, scouting out the area around the atolls in the mid Pacific on a mission from Fury to try to find an artifact that no one can describe. Hell, there's not even really a consensus on what it can do. But Fury wants to get his hands on it if he can. Tony manages to get there, but then his plane sinks. Yes, sinks. He'd anchored it off the island's shoreline, since the island itself had no room for a runway, being rather too tiny. And now he's stranded. Luckily he no longer needs to recharge the repulsor pump every few days. Giving in to the need, Tony scouts the island. He finds very little that will help him. There are no animals here but small songbirds, so he'll have to find a way to catch fish to eat until Pepper and Jarvis can come get him... The Stolen Child by Wolviecat for antigrav_vector (MCU, comic) The elves of the old country are keeping a close eye on those who came from their land. And not in a good way. During the years, there were moments where they came for Steve, to take him into the land of undiing... Past Imperfect by Neverever for Fluffypanda (MCU, 7625 words) Present day Tony tells Steve that Steve wouldn't like the college version of Tony. An alternative Steve, living in a dystopian future, is sent back to the past to stop the death of a young Tony Stark at MIT. He doesn't know what he's going to find but he's going to try his best to save Tony. Balancing Instincts by Xennie_B for ChibiSquirt (MCU, 7846 words) A/B/O fic: When Steve gets hit with a weapon and its effects cause his dynamic to change, Tony is unsure how their relationship is going to continue. 2016 Captain America / Iron Man Holiday Exchange - gift fic. It's Not A Birdbath (it's a Jacuzzi, dammit) by AngeNoir for SarkaS (AvAc, 4955 words) Steve wasn't... exactly in the best place when he woke up and found himself a) in the future, b) without any of his friends, and c) with a mission immediately placed in front of him, with no respite ahead. Then Tony tries talking to him, and Steve didn't want to hear it. Then Steve started listening, and started wanting to hear more. Steve doesn't realize how much he'd come to rely on it until it was no longer there. Then he's got to figure out what the hell went wrong, and how to fix it. At least Bucky can help. (He hopes.) Compilation Error by laireshi for ranoutofrun (Marvel 616, 6009 words) The first time Tony Stark kills Steve Rogers is an accident. Fanart: Homecoming Kings by imdamuffins (AU, art) Some high school first kisses~ in times like these by faite for Cap Iron Man Community (Marvel 1872, comic) Sheriff Rogers is constantly looking out for Mister Stark. (A short, text-less comic.) (It's Got to Be) All the Way by erde for Cap Iron Man Community (AA (cartoon), 3078 words) Steve and Tony are all about life in the fast lane. That not only applies to flying suits of armor and riding motorcycles, but also to falling into relationships, apparently. Good Vibrations by cptxrogers for Cap Iron Man Community (MCU, 1783 words) Steve never could turn down a bet. Especially when it's made by Tony. Even when it involves his team, a SHIELD briefing, and a vibrator up his ass. On My Honor, I Will Try by ChibiSquirt for Arukou (MCU, 11,353 Words) Steve never knew of his mixed heritage until Strange told him, and he didn't know what to think when he found out. But it did sort of explain some things... Together by thudworm for Xennie_B (MCU, 4,283 Words) Prompt: Howard was a good dad to Tony and is still alive when he finds Steve in the Ice only 50 years after he went down. Twenty-ish Tony and Steve fall for each other to Howard's surprise and amusement. weigh the heart, tip the scales by carzla for kaesaria (MCU, 14,003 Words) It was the first time they’d seen each other since Siberia. It was probably one of the worst possible ways to have an unscheduled reunion. It was also about to get worse. A lot worse. Home Is Where the Steve Is by AetherSprite for vorkosigan (MCU, 5.161 Words) Tony gets stranded in Siberia and only one person can help him. New World Intervals by Muccamukk for vibraniumstark (616, 4,935 Words) In the wake of Disassembled, a science experiment gone wrong casts our heroes across space-time, where Tony discovers that Steve is both the first and the last person he wants to be stuck on an alien planet with. Unknown Caller (do not engage) by gottalovev for MassiveSpaceWren (MCU, 13,416 Words) Steve had one job: exchange a couple of texts with a guy who thought he had Natasha's number, and let him down gently. It ends up being a lot more complicated than that. Like A Melody Stuck In My Head by SarkaS for mitochondrials (MCU/AA, 3,973 Words) Pepper has a birthday wish. Steve is in love. Natasha is amused. And Tony is simply awesome because hey, it's Tony. for what it's worth by faite for Cap Iron Man Community (AA, Comic) Steve and Tony crash-land onto a remote island in the midst of an argument. But they'd rather get out of there and make up already. (Comic) Not in the fine print by daisybelle for Mushroom (MCU, 3745 words) Steve visits Tony in Stark Industries with a bouquet and an invitation to a lunch date. Story/fanart in POV of a Stark Industries Employee looking at their relationship. The End is Where We Begin by Veldeia for Muccamukk (Next Avengers, 19944 words) Tony has spent twelve years raising the Avengers' children alone, under Ultron's shadow, thinking everyone else is dead. After finally defeating Ultron, they discover that the Avengers aren't dead after all, but were kept in stasis all along. So, Tony has to reconnect with his partners, Steve and Natasha, after all these years, while Steve has to come to terms with how everything has changed, starting from his son, who is now a teenager instead of a toddler. baby doll I recognize you're a hideous thing inside by grue for Sineala (Marvel 616, 4526 words) "It's probably a prank," Tony says. He's got his suit on and is taking scans, he doesn't really think this is a prank, but the dear Captain looks like he's going to sneeze blood in his fury so downplaying is the way to go. "It's a threat," Steve says. He's got that glare dialled up to eleven. Tony is pretty happy that it's not directed at him this time. save the date [illustration] by mrsgingles for daisybelle (MCU, art) Tony and Steve are having a date at the market. Nat and Clint have (secretely) set themselves the task of taking as many sappy photos as they possibly can and making sure nobody, neither an overeager Captain America fan nor a certain Dr. Doom, would interrupt the couple in their soulful intense gazing into each other's eyes. Connection by MissRomanceJunkie for AngeNoir (MCU, 11592 words) Steve’s not your typical Guide and Guide rights have come a long way since Dr. Erskine had to sneak him into the Rebirth program. True Sentinels are rare, but Anthony Stark is definitely one, and no one feels safe around a potentially violent hedonist like Stark. Only sometimes, Steve thinks the isolation is wearing on Tony, since even Bruce, with his Other Guy, isn’t quite easy around someone who can sense every emotion in the air that someone else is feeling. Slowly, Steve decides to do something to break that isolation. Adaptive Immunity by captainshellhead, vibraniumstark for Veldeia (Marvel 616, 3867 words) Tony programs Extremis to act as his immune system, and it works a little too well. Dreamin' Each Night of His Charms by windscryer for morphia (MCU, 1687 words) There are wet dreams and then there are warm, hard, cuddly dreams that make you feel like the Alpha you can't stop thinking about is actually there in bed with you. Wait, hold on. Man of Iron - The Changeling Prince by justanotherpipedream for Cap Iron Man Community (AU, 6152 words) Captain Steve Rogers first wandered into Stark's Emporium to get a potion to help his ailing mother. He didn't realize that it was run by the infamous Man of Iron, the former head inventor of the King's court. With mechanical wings (and a mechanical heart), Tony recruits the Captain to help him seek ingredients in the south forest - where the unprepared perish and rich men hire caravans to protect them from the creatures within. One Winter Day by adarksweetness for miramare (Avengers Academy, 2,596 Words]) It's winter at Avengers Academy. There are Frost Giants outside the walls, Asgardians on campus, and Steve can't stop thinking about Tony's blacksmith outfit. That One Word by inukagome15 for fandomfrolics (616, 1,753 Words) There's a certain word Steve's been careful not to say, namely because he knows Tony has certain feelings about it. And that's fine. Isn't it? Trust Me, I Got You by fynndin for Ivorysilk (MCU, Art & 3073 Words) N/A Presenting Iron "Man" by Lets_call_me_Lily for lazywriter7 (Noir, Art) My Cap-Ironman Holiday Exhange fill for this year, featuring a grumpy female Tony Stark glowering at Steve, who's not in the frame :) Searching by fandomfrolics for Lets_call_me_Lily (616, 2,232 Words) Tony is doing all he can to help Steve find his recently-returned-from-the-dead friend Bucky Barnes. Everyone seems to notice but Steve. Canon divergence from Captain America Vol 5 #14. sit with me (and look up at the stars) by MusicalLuna for fantalaimon (MCU, 1,363 Words) Natasha wants to protect her friends from the things that haunt them--that can be difficult when they decide to face their demons head-on. Before the clock strikes 12 by ranoutofrun for Neurotoxia (Noir, Comic) As the hands of a clock face meet together briefly, so do they record the passage of time. And yet being those hands on a clock, they themselves are the keepers of time but aren't themselves immune to its effects. All clocks meet and all clocks stop. But time marches forward, ever onward, ever faster. In The Cards by dapperanachronism for grue (MCU, 6135 Words) By this point Tony really should have been used to the more bizarre twists and turns his life had taken -- especially since setting up a high profile superhero crash pad. But it turns out there are things that still manage to catch even him off guard and leave him floundering. Meanwhile the way he feels every time Steve looks at him, when his chest goes all warm and fluttery, well that certainly isn't making any of this any easier. Feel Like a Puzzle (Can't Find Your Missing Piece) by MassiveSpaceWren for Cap Iron Man Community (616, 7,824 Words) After the Civil War, after Steve’s death, after Tony deleted his brain and the Siege on Asgard ended, things were finally looking up for Tony. He couldn’t believe his luck when Steve not only wanted their friendship back, but also asked him on a date. Things weren't quite as rosy as they seemed, though, and soon Tony found himself dealing with villains and teammates alike while trying to figure out how to continue after forgetting the last year of his life. My Heart Belongs to Another by Veldeia for Cap Iron Man Community (MCU/Once Upon a Time(tv), 17,175 Words) Long ago, young, drunk and desperate, Tony made a deal with a fairy tale creature: his heart for someone else's life. When said creature shows up to collect his prize years later, things turn out more complicated than either of them expects, and unless Tony's true love can find the arc reactor that's now his heart, he won't have long to live. Crossover with Once Upon a Time, but can be read without any knowledge of the show. Ferrum Hiemem by KagekaNecavi for TheOneWhoWantsForgotten (Avengers Academy, 3,287 Words) In an alternate timeline where James Rhodes is Captain America, Steve Rogers is Iron Man, and Bucky Barnes is War Machine, Tony Stark is the one who fell off the train in the mountains and became the Winter Soldier. Fortunately for him one thing that is common across nearly every timeline is the friendship, love, and support the Avengers have for each other. Tony Stark and the Dime a Dozen Spell by Lilian_Cho for thudworm (MCU, 8,492 Words) “Thor, look out!” The moment Tony saw the spell take form, he barreled towards his teammate to intercept the flash of purple light. Too late did he remember that: 1) if there was a team member that didn't need his protection, it was Thor a.k.a. the near-invincible alien god, and 2) the Iron Man suit provided zero defense against magic. “Oh, crap,” was Tony’s succinct observation before he was completely engulfed in sparkly purple light. From the Bronx to Bangkok by Captain_Al for navaan (616, 5,578 Words) They’re just the same as they were before, except sometimes, when they’re both free, they spend the night together. Steve hasn’t regretted it, the kiss that followed the look, until today. nose boop by miramare for Maya_Desires (Avengers Academy, Comic) CapWolf can't stop scenting Tony. Tony is confused and scared. Stranger Than Fiction by Maya_Desires for a_sparrows_fall (Avengers Assembled, 3,196 Words) Nothing is too hard or difficult for Auror Tony Stark, an excellent certified genius wizard of the time. Whoever said working there would be easy for him hadn't informed him about Steve Rogers. Now the whole precinct must suffer through the extra dose of warm fluffy UST. (It's winter. We can use the warmth! It's all fluffy.) Threshold Consciousness by magicasen for Woad (616, 14,423 Words) Tony's acting strangely—short, snappish, and dangerously distracted. Steve needs to figure out what's bothering his friend, and he'll do anything to help—up to and including (literally) falling into bed with him. Twice as Nice by kaesaria for carzla (MCU, 1,770 Words) “So... there are two of you now.” Tony doesn’t sound all that concerned about it. More intrigued than anything else, dark eyes sliding deliberately up Steve’s body and down—the other Steve’s, which is kind of alarming. And confusing. Written in response to Carlza's prompt for the Cap-IM Holiday Exchange. Mutually Assured Infatuation by Meatball42 for dapperanachronism (MCU, 3,033 Words) When Steve gifts Tony a teddy bear to help him get better after he’s injured on a mission, Tony decides he can’t let it stand. Lead and I'll Follow by Woad for Cap Iron Man Community (Noir, 2,380 Words) Under orders, Captain Rogers prepares for a gala by taking dance lessons. He's not sure how Fury persuaded Adventurer Tony Stark to give said lessons, though. For comm prompt: For one night, Steve and Tony try to forget there's a war going on as they slow dance, alone in a cozy room. Strategic Reinforcement by antigrav_vector for Cap Iron Man Community (MCU, 3,819 Words) Tony is working late again, and Steve is tired of waiting. Going down to the workshop reveals something astonishing, and what else is a man to do when presented with something like that, except reward his boyfriend? All Down But Nine by Fluffypanda for Cap Iron Man Community (1872, 1,513 Words) In which there is a saloon brawl and Tony misses the obvious. Sotto Voce by Woad for Cap Iron Man Community (Ultimates, 3,465 Words) Tony's motto is better to give than to receive. With Steve, that's a must. bleeding in and out like it's breathing by Neurotoxia for viennasunrise (MCU, 3847 words) panic attack (ˈpænɪk əˈtæk; noun): A sudden overwhelming feeling of acute and disabling anxiety. Stark men don’t have ‘panic attacks’, and certainly not over something as insignificant as Steve being late. Greatness Comes in Tiny Packages by TheOneWhoWantsForgotten for Themisto (MCU, 4957 words) No one ever said being Iron Man's bodyguard was going to be easy, but Steve had kind of hoped it wouldn't involve this particular piece of paperwork. He wasn't ready to be a husband. Gifts of the Season by Ivorysilk for inukagome15 (MCU, 5244 words) With seemingly endless deadlines and evening events, Tony is getting more and more tired and sick as the holidays approach--but Steve has his own crazy schedule to manage. With Christmas only a few days away, will Tony ever get a few moments together with him? You Know Where To Find Me by a_sparrows_fall for magicasen (Marvel 616, 31306 words) After an Avengers mission goes awry, Steve takes a leave of absence from the team, and he and Tony part on bad terms. But then Steve gets turned into a werewolf, and he finds his shapeshifting linked to his feelings about Tony, who’s had a terrible accident. If Steve never sees Tony again, will he be stuck in wolf form forever? A closely-canon compliant 616 Capwolf story. It's still me. by a_sparrows_fall for magicasen (Marvel 616, art) Steve as a wolf, in his proper Cap uniform. :) Smells like "I love you" by MiniRaven for afincf_tirwer (MCU, 10650 words) Steve is having a hard time coming to terms with parts of the future. More precisely, he's having problems coming to terms with his relationship with Tony Stark on and off the field. He visits Peggy for a little advice, but gets a little more than he barged for when he walks in the room. ÄPPLARÖ by Veldeia for windscryer (MCU, 2085 words) Letting Thor take charge of organizing the party was definitely a bad move, but there's no going back now: Tony and Steve must face a challenge unlike anything either of them have ever met. No one dies and furniture is… assembled. (And disassembled.) Even Though We Know Love's Landscape by lazywriter7 for fynndin (MCU, 7918 words) "But at the core, he’s the same brand of poor little rich guy that dot the shadowed corners of every charity gala, every award function. Sure, maybe it comes in a ‘genius billionaire playboy philanthropist’ package…but his mettle is common iron. A drop of sea water, a dash of air, and he’d rust right through. She, on the other hand, is made of better stuff." In which Tony compares people to weird things, Steph recites poetry and two dorks fall in love. (Not So) Big Fan by Woad for Cap Iron Man Community (Marvel Ultimates/Marvel Tsum Tsums, art) Ults Steve meets Iron Man the Tsum Tsum. never the same love twice by laireshi for Cap Iron Man Community (Marvel 616, 656 words) Steve never quite stops falling in love with Tony. Trying to find the in-betweens by gottalovev for MassiveSpaceWren (MCU, 4338 words) The Avengers might be broken up, but Steve can't stand idly by while someone is publicly threatening Tony's life. The Monsters Are Here (The Monsters Are Me) by Essie for KagekaNecavi (Marvel 616, 4513 words) Ten years after the final incursion, Tony Stark is Sorcerer Supreme, Doctor Doom is trying to enslave the world and Steve Rogers just wants to be left alone. Intrepid Hearts by Neverever for Lilian_Cho (Marvel 616, 4506 words) Tony hangs around the mansion more after Steve is seriously hurt in an explosion caused by Iron Man. Steve likes Tony but doesn't know why Tony is upset all the time. Maybe Iron Man is the problem. Love's old song will be new by gottalovev for MassiveSpaceWren (Marvel Noir, 5808 words) Tony's plan for the evening was to have a drink with Rhodes before starting a new adventure. He wasn't counting on a gorgeous soldier catching his eye always meet your heroes by navaan for Wolviecat (Iron Man: Armored Adventures, 2791 words) Iron Man is a beloved hero, but even he is amazed when Captain America appears back on the scene. One Last Second Chance by Muccamukk for imdamuffins (Marvel 57289, 6405 words) Tony Stark, second newest engineer at Rhodes Labs International, is just trying to rebuild from the ruins of his failed company, vanished fortune, and struggles with alcoholism. His goals include keeping his head down, avoiding stress and convincing Dr. Rhodes to let him build a really cool robot, so why does the universe keep throwing Avengers in his path? Honeymoon Hell by KagekaNecavi for Neverever (Avengers Assemble, 5822 words) After the wedding it takes Steve and Tony a while to get around to going on their honeymoon. When they arrive at their first destination they find out that their luggage is literally on the other side of the country. Things only get worse from there. full of broken thoughts (i cannot repair) by vejiicakes for Themisto (MCU, art) After Steve's fall from the HYDRA train mission and being remade as the Winter Soldier, he isn't sure who he's become. Decades later and a million miles away, he might be able to start again... Track-Team Coach Rogers by morphia for Agent C (MCU, 11241 Words) When Tony, single dad of sporty teen Liberty, decides he wants to start dating again, he finds it is not as simple to outsmart a teenager as he'd hoped. Things get even more complicated when the guy he's after turns out to be none other than her track team coach, and her first crush. Steve Rogers and the Pureblood Heir by Lenalena for Cap Iron Man Community (AU, 14319 words) Hogwarts AU; Tony and Steve are in rival houses and have always butted heads. Then one Christmas they find themselves at Hogwarts together during the Holidays while the rest of their friends go home. Broken Mirrors by laireshi for Cap Iron Man Community (Marvel 616/MCU, 3488 words) “He hid some things from me,” Tony says, then shrugs. “It’s fine. I hid some things from him, too. Don’t you know this story?” 616 Steve meets MCU Tony. Last Train Home by erde for Cap Iron Man Community (MCU, 10949 words) Steve writes letters to Tony that he never sends. By the time he hands them to their rightful owner, Tony has had a brush with death, has retired as a superhero, and now has a small town workshop of his very own. But it's okay, Steve has gone into retirement too. All the works are in the AO3 collection. Thank you again, 2016 Cap-Iron Man Holiday Exchange mods Laire, Salma, Tea, Teyke