#mcsweeney's internet tendency

[contemplatingoutlander]

This is an amazing compilation of 1056 awful things that Trump has said or done from Feb.10, 2011 to Jan. 20, 2021. (Although it does not include the hundreds of other awful things from the past 3.5 years, the list is long enough--the PDF version is 360 pages!)

The catalog starts with Trump's questioning Obama's educational credentials on Feb. 10, 2011:

During a speech to the Conservative Political Action Conference, Trump said, “Our current president came out of nowhere. Came out of nowhere. In fact, I’ll go a step further: The people that went to school with him, they never saw him, they don’t know who he is. It’s crazy.” This is false. Numerous accounts from Obama’s college classmates refute Trump’s claim, including Obama’s Columbia roommate, Phil Doerner. [color emphasis added]

And the catalog ends with Trump's behavior on Jan. 20, 2021:

On his final day in office, Trump did not invite Joe and Jill Biden to the White House, rejecting a longstanding tradition among presidents and their successors. Rather than attend the inauguration of his successor — making him the first president in modern history to skip the ceremony — Trump headed to Joint Base Andrews. There, a small crowd gathered to see him off. Not among them was Trump’s vice president. “We were not a regular administration,” Trump said in unscripted remarks. “Have a good life, we will see you soon.” As the Village People’s “Y.M.C.A.” played in the background, Trump then boarded Air Force One and returned to his resort in Florida. [color emphasis added]

After seeing the entire list, it is simply mind boggling that a huge segment of the American population STILL wants this guy to lead our nation--and STILL wants to give him access to nuclear codes.

Never underestimate the denial and willful ignorance of large segments of the American public.

[discrepancybot]

If you've seen Saltburn, the above piece from McSweeney's Internet Tendency is hilarious.

[macksting]

https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/faq-the-snake-fight-portion-of-your-thesis-defense

oh man, they made you defend your thesis? that's fucked up, they told me mine was perfect the way it is and just gave me the phd

[goawaygoongit]

susan mary kovolski I would go to prom with u <3

[thatswhatsushesaid]

shitpost dispatches from across the jianghu - mcsweeney's internet tendency edition

note: sources inside the cloud recesses confirm that hanguang-jun is not actually sorry

[brightlotusmoon]

The Louvre Is Thrilled to Announce It Is Rebranding to “UVR” - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

If there’s one thing we’ve concluded from the millions of visitors who pass through our doors every year, it’s that art is passé. Art is stale in an age of content—unlimited content you can hardwire to your cerebellum with maximum connectivity, allowing you to upload videos with your smart shoe, get a crappier version of the cable television you cut the cord on years ago, and watch reality shows transpire in real-time in reality with no scripts, no actors, no directors, no cameras, no crews, no catering, and no pesky union wages that make it impossible to hoard all the profit for yourself for work someone else did.

You see, in the future of tomorrow’s today, we’re visioneering. You can do banking with a flicker of your eye, communicate with your dead loved ones with incoherent AI that regurgitates gibberish that sounds nothing like them, and record audio with your mind before it’s swiftly forgotten unless you order our memory-enhancement supplements—be sure to sign up for a subscription, fam, for the best deal and assurance you’ll never run out, lest all your cherished memories be erased. Memories are content, and content is here for its coronation, baby. After all, we once hosted French kings, so we’re an authority in telling you there’s a new king in town, and that king is content, beautiful, sweet, sweet content—oh, content, my love, how I long for thee, how my aching loins quiver for thy sweet embrace.

[wilkins]

My byline in the hallowed pages of McSweeney's Internet Tendency last Thursday. Truly an honor.

[adtothebone]

Candy Heart Messages After Elon Musk Buys Sweethearts for $44 Billion - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

[lamajaoscura]

What Your Favorite Stephen Sondheim Song Says About You - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

[vaegtersang]

Luke Burns, FAQ: The "Snake Fight" Portion of Your Thesis Defense, McSweeney's Internet Tendency (Nov. 19, 2010), https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/faq-the-snake-fight-portion-of-your-thesis-defense.

[scottguy]

Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056 - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

[asphinxofblackquartz]

Halloween: Michael Myers breaks through your front door. He informs you that your son volunteered you to bring a “homemade sweet treat” to the kindergarten holiday parade, which is in two hours.

If Horror Movies Reflected Your Actual Fears - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

[finishinglinepress]

NEW FROM FINISHING LINE PRESS: Raccoon Latrine by Ellen Ferguson

On SALE: https://www.finishinglinepress.com/product/raccoon-latrine-by-ellen-ferguson/

Raccoon Latrine invites readers to sit outside for a while, outside themselves, outside their back steps, outside all the other things. These poems suggest there’s somewhere else to go, somewhere in #nature. The more intrepid short poems lightly massage the memories that rise in the evening while others, afraid to go out at night, watch the #raccoons like television as they look for a place on the porch to relax. Sometimes experiencing nature fully is as simple as turning the page, whether you are a foster beagle, a character on the Sopranos, or anyone else you will find hanging out on the porch, or just under it.

Ellen Ferguson’s poetry chapbook Small Fiasco was published by Finishing Line Press. She wrote the “Diversity in the News” column for McSweeney’s Internet Tendency. She is the author of the book Can Creativity Be Taught? Her nonfiction has been published in Kugelmass, the Journal of Literary Humor. She has been a 30/30 poet for Tupelo Press three times, each time publishing 30 poems in a month. She worked for The New Yorker Magazine and SPY before she started teaching English and couldn’t stop. She is a recipient of the University of Chicago Outstanding Educator Award. Her co-authored screenplay “Demo Queen” was a semi-finalist in humor in the Screenplay Festival.

PRAISE FOR Raccoon Latrine by Ellen Ferguson

“I haven’t had this much fun reading poetry since Richard Brautigan.”

–Carol Vinzant, author of Don’t Be Like Trump

“Grecian urns and Uber; Seinfeld, Shakespeare, Meadow Soprano; Tennessee Williams, hashtag Keats, and Julia Louis-Dreyfus: these poems are situated, at once peculiar and particular, a world just off its axis — and ambivalent about righting the ship. There’s a joy in the comings and goings, in the hodgepodge of it all, turns of phrase and perspective steering us this way then that with a gentle joy in the things of this life — language, perhaps, above all. Literary, beautiful, funny, surprising — I hear John Berryman — they are not a universal reckoning but proffer a perspective, this taking in of so much, of it all, getting knocked about with a smile that hints at a melancholy that never comes.”

–Daniel Coffeen, PhD. Author of Reading the Way of Things: Towards a New Technology of Making Sense

Please share/repost #flpauthor #preorder #AwesomeCoverArt #read #poems #literature #poetry #nature

[paradesign]

I’m torn. Both Galadriel and Sauron say the other is a threat to Middle-earth. One has to be wrong, so whom am I to trust? Should I trust the Dark Lord who attempted to topple the White City of Gondor, dominate all life, and attempt to stay in power for eternity? Or do I trust the Elf Queen representing the coalition of Men and Elves who defeated Sauron when he tried to enslave the Free Peoples… but could maybe do more meet-and-greets?

I’m an Undecided Hobbit, Torn Between a Dark Lord Who Promises an Age of Chaos and an Elf Queen Whom I Just Wish I Knew More About - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

[hotfored]

A Math Exam, but Obviously Some Stuff Has Happened over the Summer in the Teacher’s Personal Life - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

[firewireblog-blog]

McSweeney’s Advent Calendar

Hark. Behold The McSweeney’s Advent Calendar: a treasury of the very best holiday humor writing from McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, festooned throughout with holiday transmissions from across the vast McSweeney’s literary empire. Inside this exquisite holiday wonder cabinet of twenty-four gem-like minibooks (illustrated by acclaimed artist Sophy Hollington), you’ll find such luminous titles as…