#maybe its bcuz im too dumb that i dont get it

[necrogfie]

ngl i still dont get why the gouvernement is the one to decide if a disabled (in particular mentally) person is allowed to date and like has the 'capacity' to do so

its weird

[br1ghtestlight]

zeke and jimmy jr are so fucking stupid. immediately a 10/10 episode just for tankbottoms (tank tops for your bottom™️)

THEYRE SO FUCKING STUPID THERES TEARS IN MY EYES..... if anybody ever hurts these boys ever in their lives i dont know what im going to do. probably cry about it

BABYYY ZEKE HES SO ADORABLE 😭😭💕 love how squished his face is. he's Three apples tall snd very very small

Hey guys :D love how she's dropped the "hey jimmy jr!!! ZEKE." thing and started being normal about greeting them. sorry we're not even a minute into the episode i just love these kids so much they're sooo sweet and so stupid. accurate middle schooler representation

jimmy jr and tina talking :') they're buddies. love that he's already explained this tankbottoms idea to tina and she Does Not Like It

HEY GENE BROWN EYES MENTION!!! always love to have rhat confirmed

oh that jimmy pesto impression is UNCANNY. aww why are they fighting they were sorta kinda becoming friends. not really but in my heart they were after the christmas episode and them racing cars together

"aahh im bored' oh so he's literally just gay? is that what this is?

JIMMY PESTO SAYING ITS BEEN SLOW AT HIS PLACE LATELY LMAO i wonder why that could be!! surely no real world events coincided with that happening!!!!

jimmy pesto is so stupid i missed him so much. i missed ur stupid stupid handsome face SO MUCH u idiot. kisses him

YOU GET ONE PACK OF RATS COVERED IN ROACHES 😭

love how he's Literally just trying to be friends with bob and bob is like. can you leave? could you please leave?? there's something going on here not even gay people have a word for. this is a brand new type of interaction

"our rats and roaches dont get along" "aah well you're lucky"

"right that was ALMOST a normal conversation but you're you soo you said that" *fart noise* "THATS YOU" why is jimmy literally the equivalent of a boy teasing a girl he has a crush on on the playground bcuz he likes her and doesnt know how to show it. what is their PROBLEM

aww louise reading the burobu magazine 🥺🥺💕 sorry this is relevant to a fanfic im working on. also love these new views of the playground thats also great to have (also for the same fanfic) (there's a lot going on in this fanfic)

jimmy jr is so fucking stupid and literally my baby boy. ACTUAL love of my life. he's so dumb <3

"teatherball? oh my god. another TB" there's literally zero braincells in that boys head this is already one of my favorite jimmy jr episodes. also zeke getting jealous that tina is spending time around a boy who hates zeke?? kinda cute. he liiiikes her :) i think he's also just terrified of will but i think he's also a little jealous maybe. zeke contains multitudes

"I just, uh, don't want to have fun... like that. With a bunch of balls in my mouth."

"Fine. Some people are just more open to new ideas."

presenting this conversation with no context. AND jimmy pesto being gay in the background bcuz of course he would be

okay well im already assuming this b plot is gonna go in the direction of jimmy pesto copying bob bcuz business has been slow for him and he thinks bob is generally a better cook so if he copies him maybe he'll get more business too. which is ADORABLE and reminds me so much of the christmas episode where jimmy pesto recommended bob's food bcuz it was so good. also if jimmy thinks that bob is copying his business FJDMDJFKDKDSJ reminds me of a past episode i cant remember the name of but like better.... bcuz they're gay and stupid

gene is a sweet boy <3 sweet song and moment. love that him and louise are just always hanging out together

ohh jimmy jr he's so sweet 😭 he loves zeke so much its adorable. i know there's nothing anybody could do or say to make him stop loving zeke or wanting to be his friend and its actually really cute. he's been great in this episode

"My sweet best friend. My sweet, sweet Zeke..."

love jimmy jr being just as heartbroken over somebody being mean to zeke as i am FJDMDJDKSKS he's literally DEVASTATED by this news. who would bully zeke he's literally a baby? just a baby boy??

"I don't like bullies. And I especially don't like them at our school. And in our sister's grade. I mean, what if he makes Tina pee and embarasses her? She's already fighting an uphill battle."

louise is both very sweet and protective and also VERY funny lmao SHES ALREADY FIGHTING AN UPHILL BATTLE

love jimmy jr louise and gene's dynamic in this episode. they care so much about their babies (zeke and tina) its cuuute

"i feel bad for zeke too but i just dont think aggression is the answer" coming from the kid who got his ass beat by a nine year old. on MULTIPLE occasions

love mort ordering the burger of the day like he has a gun pointed at his head FJDMDKDKSKSS also mort and teddy getting along!! yay!!!! big win for the tedmort shippers in the fandom

"Zeke... I just want you to know that I'm here for you and I care about you." when did jimmy jr get all emotionally mature??

WOLLY BULLY

"I get why you wouldn't want to tell me, because I'm one of the cool kids..." gonna need a citation for that one jimmy jr

if there's one thing louise is gonna do its ignore EVERYBODY telling her not to do something for revenge and do it anyway. like girl u gotta know when to let something go i know you're protective but FJDMSKSDKDK

"whats going on down there" dont even worry about it rudy

i love school episodes they're so silly. still a 50/50 chance zeke WAS the bully vs being bullied and this is a misunderstanding but either way this is very fun and i love seeing all the kids hanging out at recess and lunch etc

tina has had like three lines total in this episode where IS that girl

"i was the bully" yeah i figured since this episode still has half the runtime left and no other possible way this conflict could go LMAO but on that note its kinda sweet that he's made friends and a life for himself at wagstaff and he's not mean to kids anymore. he's a good kid in his heart & he always was

NOT THE APPLE JUICE 😭😭💔

not tina crushing on will in the background.... its not ur episode girl get outta here

"i can see that" rudy is there something you'd like to share with the class 🤨🏳️‍🌈

"SORRY me spraying juice on you wasn't bullying! That was just an accident." POOR GENE he's so worried about upsetting someone or hurting their feelings

BABY ZEKE COMPILATION TJIS IS A BIG MOMENT FOR ME gonna need to screenshot this after bcuz he's so small. maybe the smallest boy in the whole entire world

"i was always the new kid and it wasn't easy making friends" 😭😭💕 AND NOW HE HAS TINA AND JIMMY JR GENE LOUISE RUDY and even tammy and jocelyn (kinda sorta) and he doesnt need to be nervous anymore..... he has a home and he's never going to leave. sorry brb im crying i love zeke and their littlr friend group so much

BETWEEN THAT AND MY IMPULSE CONTROL ISSUES I JUST STARTED WRESTLING KIDS sorry zeke is many things but he is NOT smart thats why him and jimmy jr are two peas in a pod. not a braincell between them

HE JUST HAD A LOT OF NERVOUS ENERGYYYY okay adhd zeke is literally canon now. to me. like i dont care what the episode says thats true now in my heart they basically said it

and then i kept trying to make them laugh :( zeke noo he's such a sweetheart and a good kid. he never had anybody who LIKED him before who really saw him for who he was until jimmy jr and their friend group. sobbing. I HAD A GROUP OF FRIENDS AND A NICKNAME IT WAS THE FIRST TIME I FELT LIKE I REALLY BELONGED....... CRYING SOBBING THROWING UP ETC

ive been told i have the perfect neck for headlocks. okay thank you rudy

jimmy jr is soo emotionally mature and thoughtful in this episode. TINA WHAT ON EARTH R U DOING IN THIS EPISODE she didnt even react to zeke's story bro. its so over

like a little italian squirrel :)

"Linda's right, Bob. And my therapist would say that you should focus on your own happiness and not compare it to other people's."

"Your therapist is an IDIOT!"

"You take that back, Bob! Do not speak of Doctor Marjorie that way. That woman has put up with SO MUCH in her life! The balls haven't always rolled her way!"

😭😭??? this was so funny lmao. also love how casually teddy mentions his therapist (throughout the entire show!! she was mentioned in his first appearance) and how normalized it is. like yeah he has a therapist and he has mental health issues & trauma and its just something he casually mentions

also mort always talks about ordering the soup at bobs burgers but we've NEVER seen soup on the menu or anybody else eating soup there what is up with that?? does bob make the soup especially for mort??? what is going on there. so many unanswered questions

"Look I don't know what THIS is..." *gestures vaugely to bob and jimmy pesto* Thats literally exactly how i feel whenever i watch an episode with them now. i dont know what the hell is going on between them and quite frannkly thats none of my business!!!

"im not SHRIEKING!!!!" he shrieked

"Zeke! Listen. We've all done things we're not proud of. I used to tell Andy and Ollie that there was actually only one of them. It messed with them for weeks. The point is... we recognize our mistakes and we learn from them. It's how we grow."

ONE we got a big brother jimmy jr mention HELL YEAH‼️‼️ love him tormenting andy and ollie he's such a terrible big brother (affectionate) and TWO in my head this is kinda jimmy jr apologizing for how he's fucked over tina in the past?? maybe im literally delusional about them but him admitting he's done things he isnt proud of and that he's hurt people before. cmon. thats gotta be about tina right. just lie to me at this point

JIMMY JUNIOR LMAOO he's literally so silly in this episode im obsessed with him

WHAT THE HELL WILL??

did zeke make fun of will for being a dancer lmfao thats why he wanted jimmy junior to leave right. he doesnt want jj to hate him

HE MADE FUN OF MY LISP 😭😭 no thats literally actually worse bcuz jimmy junior's lisp is soo. god. but zeke loves jimmy jr so much i know he would never do that to him. he literally LOVES that boy so goddamn much

YOUR LIPS FJDMDDJDKDKDD THEY LOOK FINR TO ME. somebody needs to sedate me im gonna become a jimmy jr fan account after this episode

JIMMY JR NOOOOOOOO ZEKE LOVES U HES UR BEST FRIEND. if they stop being friends after this episode im killing myself. like it would be so over for me. couldnt live after that theyre besties. theyre BESTIES

imagining if this was jimmy jr instead of will and actually literally crying real tears over it

I DONT EVEN THINK I WANT TO DO TANKBOTTOMS WITH YOU ANYMORE. thats literally worse than divorce whats even the point

"I mean, a lot of people don't know this but I have a speech impediment."

"Huh."

"Really?"

"Ooh I never noticed..."

"Yeah. I worked through a lot of it but sometimes it still shows up."

love this dumbass autistic boy. he's my sweetheart angel i would die for him 1000 times over and over

I THOUGHT TINA WAS GONNA ASK ZEKE TO SHOW HIS BUTT SAYING "I mean you could...." i was like ooohkay tina sure. okay

aww bob is so smart. and cool

JIMMY JR HOLDING ZEKES BACKPACK FOR HIM sorry idk why i thought that was so cute. gonna need a screenshot of that

LOVE GENE AND LOUISES EXPRSSSIONS IN THIS SCENE sorry okay im paying attention to their gay little fight too ig

AWWW HAHA ZEKE IS SUCH AN OLDER BROTHER this scene is so cute. him teasing gene and louise <3

THIS EPISODE WAS SOO ADORABLE OMG i loved jimmy jr in this episode and his friendship with zeke. maybe my favorite episode this season?? its hard to say bcuz all of them have been so enjoyable and good but i love school setting episodes and zeke is such a good character. the subplot was also really good w/ jimmy pesto although i will NOT be letting bob forget what happened between them in the christmas episode and when he brought jimmy pesto his pain meds. he might forget but i will NOT. they were seriously for real gay there

[transfemlogan]

is it too late to ask about your problems with canon moceit. im really curious cuz i like their canon dynamic

ITS NEVER TOO LATE !!!

okay so okay. okay. okay.

i will say i do not like patton ships in general, minus royality, so some of my moceit dislike stems from that. like again im very neutral on ships, but i tend to stray away from patton ships. hes 1 of my least fave characters so i just dont like imagining him in dynamics.

BUT! a lot of my moceit hate stems fron how they're written. i don't like how janus'& patton's relationship in canon is written. i know we havent gotten a lot of in canon interactions bcuz its been almost 4 years but it feels very, very fast past & like... not how a relationship should span.

i know people get so pissy when you say this but it is inherently pattons fault that the dark sides exist— it's all of the light sides fault, dont get me wrong, but it is especially patton's fault metaphorically. i am not trying to demonise him or hate on him or like say he's the villain or whatever dumb shit, but patton represents thomas' morality. the dark sides exist because thomas views them as inherently evil & thomas' views and opinions are morality. that is the definition of morality.

metaphorically speaking, thomas' morality is the reasons the dark sides exist and patton represents his morality.

janus is a dark side. he was casted aside because thomas views lying as an inherently a bad thing because he is catholic. patton casted janus side because patton thought lying was an inherently bad thing.

so when i see like... janus & patton interact in the into the unknown video or in the 5 years video it's so strange to me to see there be 0 awkwardness. no grudges held against each other. no mishaps or underlying opinions. theyre just ... friends?

like, if you are pushed and demonised by this person, you are not going to just casually talk to them after getting accepted. i cant even remember if patton apologised to janus at all in POF. & like janus knows how pattom treats roman & c!tjomas & i know janus isnt going to demonise patton back (well. glances at how he treated roman. maybe he would.) BUT THERE SHOULD BE SOME SORT OF LIKE. "HEY U STILL DID THIS SHITTY THING TO ME."

like it's not a one time thing, for like 30+ years thomas did not know he had a deceitful side or a dark creativity or whatever the hell orange is. this is 30 years that the dark sides were demonised and treated like this. this is years of their life. that shit fucks with you. it's like getting bullies for years and now all of a sudden your bullies are like "ok ur fine now" except way fucking worse.

& especially for patton to not be hesitant to trust janus still or slip up and say something that implies that he still doesnt agree w/ lying or something or like. saying something that he knows is bad now but has thought for years so it's just a habit.

the fact that there's no hesitation on either of their ends to me is sooo EUGHH. like it'd be way more interesting to see them stumble over their friendship & struggle but they just DONT. DO THAT. & ITS TERRIBLE I HATE IT.

& i hate the idea of them ever being in a romantic relationship with each other. like... patton, you demonised this guy for fucking years. you treated him like shit but now you're nice and attracted to him. like it feels like one of those awfully written enemies 2 lovers. like thats.. very weird to me.

outside of canon, i think their dynamic is kind of fun. like . not exactky polar oppisites like how remus & patton are or virgil & patton are but not exactly different sides of the same coin like how janus & logan are. but like. i dont even know how 2 describe their dynamic. reaching for the same goal with the same methods but very very very different opinions.

IDK LIKE. YEAH i understand the reason 4 why people ship them, but they have the same issues as prinxiety 4 me i think. like acting as if their past can just disappear like that. 30 years is a lot of time of your life to be treated like that, and a simple "i trust you" or whatever will never erase that. & im not saying they cant try or that they shouldnt (they definitely should!). just that there needs to be more push back. more struggles within their relationship for it to feel realistic. (& a romantic relationship just icks me out. janus you should not get into a relationship with that man.)

ERRMM AND ALSO JANUS IS ALREADY DATING LOGAN NOT PATTON SOOO PATTON CAN GO AWAY 🙄🙄🙄 /J /SILLY

(if any moceit shippers want 2 talk abt moceit on this post, feel free !!!) (also the opposite is true, if u hate moceit like me feel free 2 express that also.)

[matoitech]

if trigger ever makes a promare sequel (i miss galo and lio sm) what would u want out of it?

I GOT RLY BUSY AND TOTALLY FORGOT TO RESPOND TO THIS IM SORRY. god this is a good question tho, i think for me i'd definitely want like a lot MORE focus on character stuff this time! id love more sexy mech fights, more drift compatability stuff w galo and lio and the fact they were literally like mind synced in their mech, PLEASE. and imo id love like a motorcycle race or smth i dunno. 'why' itd be cool. id love a lot more galo and lio, id love a lot more aina (and theyd surely do more with gueira and meis). i just miss them too i want to see them again i think theres so much more they could do w them, so much more worldbuilding too cuz promare didnt focus a lot on that but i think it couldve helped to build up the Fascist Dystopia thing more

i know that trigger is capable of serious and good writing, especially with characters and relationships. they CAN get into the grit of stuff. i wish they would actually have more faith in their ability to do that. while writing wasnt rly a top priority w promare but out of everything galo and lios relationship was always that priority w the movie and it shows that everything else was kind of brushed over, which like, i dont Hate, i GET it and it is very common to point out that promare was definitely the studios obvious first time compressing a series worth of stuff into 1 movie, and i absolutely think focusing on galo and lio since they were literally the main characters and romance and its THEIR movie they carried was the best decision they couldve made when they were cutting around to try and fit everything into 2 hours. and they still cut a little too much from them imo like cutting galo holding lio and them just talking when galo pulled lio from the dragon and aina brought them to the frozen lake that was in the storyboards, and replacing that with the worst animated fight scene in the movie was a bad decision lol. they r the romance they need TALK time

ive talked abt it b4 so i wont get in2 it here its not super relevant but i do think a lot of promare fans were dumb abt things getting brushed over and acted like bcuz things like 'galo being traumatized' wasnt directly stated to their face he actually had no trauma, or whatever, so maybe a little bit more focus on not just keeping everything vague wouldve helped, or could be brought up more in a sequel. even w galo and lios relationship, a huge part of their relationship and dynamic is stuff is in stuff that isnt supplementary exactly its more like a Bonus but like the soundtrack being another whole plot elaborating on their relationship and feelings for each other. again i do think galo and lio being the focus was absolutely a good idea like im not against that at all lol theres a reason ppl remember them the most out of the movie. i want more focus on them now that theyre together and i want more focus on their characters in general- their backstories, their relationships, their traumas since i dont think u can write anything for promare without bringing that into it. like the pre movie experiences AND movie experiences Made the characters esp galo and lio who they r. that stuff IS important for character. and i want this for other side characters too like i want more of ainas stuff, i like her parallels to galo and i want them to keep working on it. first movie was just fucking Going Going Going with the plot and i get why but they skimped out on character relationships but imo they should expand on those in any further content.

i actually wouldnt necessarily need a sequel movie specifically especially bcuz theyd have troubles w both galos va's in japanese and english (galos japanese va was apparently Expensive and as we know billy kametz was the perfect galo va in the english dub and he unfortunately passed away last year) so im not sure how they'd... combat that even in a tv series with less budget or an ova or a video game w voice acting. a manga could work as a good follow up and also not require the extra expenses of animation or have things to deal with w voice actors, tho the director said he wouldnt make one unless it was full color and thats Expensive but also like who gives a fuck imaishi. do it. you spend money on so much bullshit you should make a full color post canon promare manga of your best story. to me :)

ive had a lot of ideas for possible sequels or follow ups over the years and i think whether any more promare was plot based or character based w just slice of life stuff or just focusing on galo and lios relationship, any of it would be rly fun to see. i also think itd be rly likely the promare would come back in some capacity in a sequel lol. they even gave themselves an opening with the promare like taking a piece of lio back to their home dimension/planet. the fires such a huge recognizable part of promare, it would be VERY likely to me that they would bring it back for a post canon story, especially when taking it away was a big source of criticism for the movie (not cuz its Cooler if the fire stays, tho thats true, but also bcuz it just literally doesnt work w the narrative to build up abt how burnish and not burnish ppl cna live peacefully and even be very close, as evidenced by galo and lio, and then just. not do anything w it cuz the run times over so oopsie better just send the aliens back. i could get into this way more but i already have many many times and i dont want to ramble more than i already am lol). but i think trigger burned themselves out a lot on promare bcuz it took so fucking long to make that they werent particularly interested in revisiting it so soon, but since it was SO successful and ppl rly loved it and imo its one of their best properties they absolutely could pick it back up again. however its also like the monkeys paw thing where u want promare to come back but u want it to be GOOD u dont want them to just make it for the sake of making it u want there to be like something they want to do with the characters or story. and the exec staff team have said they told the story they wanted to tell, but i do think they could find interesting ways to bring it back and tell more story. they might be done w galo and lio but im sure not. do it for me <3 ill write you a sequel. anwyay i rambled so much im gonna cut myself off but thank u for asking i could talk so long abt it lol

[videostak]

da plan for 2mrw is to go to the thrift again to see if theres anything cool cause 2day i went but realized a lot of cool stuff was there but none of it was on sale so 2mrw im gonna go back and see if any of it is on sale and maybe buy 1 or 2 things or maybe just 1 and then thursday im gonna go to to record store here cause i havent been in awhile and they had the charlie brown christmas album on cd and im hoping its still there cause i kept passing on it bcuz i always feel weird abt listening to like stuff that is very recognizably a soundtrack while i do stuf cause like idk. like they had the twin peaks soundtrack there too (gone now) and i was like love twin peaks and listening to the music from it but idk the reality of me actually popping the cd in my boombox to like do dishes or read or smthn seems strange to me especially when albums like that are v much sequenced with the idea that it is the shows soundtrack. so i sorta assumed the same of the charlie brown one but as more time passes im like ya that soundtrack is the best i gotta get it. if its not there its no biggie since theres always that hesitation with me with immediately recognizable soundtracks like that well actually if i lived alone id be more than comfortable listening to it like how i usually do but since i ilve w/ family theyll be like “wtf are you listening to the something soundtrack lol” which i dont really care what they think but also i kno they ll say it so constantly that itll get annoying lol. but actually now that im thinking abt it charlie brown christmas is like one of the greatest soundtracks ever. those songs live with me and feel like the back of my hadn it would be dumb to not get it if its still there. it could be gone given its holiday seasons but if its not ill get it and if it is it doesnt matter too much since im in no real hurry to get it

[queersturbate]

u said infodump abt ocs and i am here to deliver. my favfavfav oc is named danias wildborn she's a guild wars 2 (mmorpg) and shes a mesmer which is basically like someone who uses illusion magic. she's all abt responsibility and masks and like hiding who she is in order to do what she has to do and she constantly gives more than she should but she also is so deeply human and in pain and her maybe ? endgame ship is with a canon character who she pines for for a bit before realizing she needs to move on bcuz hes in love w his queen (its a whole thing) but they end up staying friends and eventually grow as people and come together when the time is right and also they adopt dumb teenagers w issues and they're badass and anyway danis is so neat to me im too lazy to go find a pic of her but her colors r red & white for clothes & purple for magic and shes :) neat.

LMAO "(it's a whole thing)"

she sounds awesome i love characters like that!! ESPECIALLY with love interests that follow the uncommon trope of like "right person wrong time - finds the time" type thing. they sound really cute especially after growing as people and probably getting more experience and stuff.

I am a Gamer tm but I actually dont play mmorpg games so i don't understand that part just because of my own lack of knowledge but i love her name and her power? abilities? but i think she is neat too!! i like her colors

[kagender]

tell me about your orikeros RIGJT NOW

omg so like. the orikeros that i get brainrot about the most frequently r the main KOORAS members..... in fact i am once again thinking about them rn and thats bcuz theyre pretty importnant to my au :) ithink

[from left to right its: rozeze, odidi, twuwawa, rozozo]

(dis is an oldish drawing so thats why they look kinda ugly/off here....... i even redesigned rozeze n her bro a bit but this is like the only drawing that i have of them other than my big AU thing)

i usually call them a SCIENCE SQUAD!!!!! though odidi and twuwawa are the only ones who do science related stuff currently really ...... rozeze used to be a scientist but she kinda stopped after a pretty major fuck up (: and well she doesnt really have the time to work on anything anyways bc shes kinda the head of da whole organization. and thats a busy job! and i think of rozozo as just a security guard really..... him n rozeze are twinsies though so even if hes a low rank he still gets more respect from his sister than any other guard haha ..... the favoritism is real

pazaza is also a KOORAS member,,,,, she just didnt exist when i drew the pic above,,,,, but they do now!!!!

hes a dang parasite frog!!!!! and shes near damn undefeatable because of the speed that her limbs recover at ..... shes like a hydra. cut her arm off and itll recover super fucking fast. maybe she'll even grow a second one! its pretty impressive. i dont think that hes very good in battle though bc shes kinda duuumb!!!

and heeeres more stuff about her :) i think im just gonna list it bc it feels more organized that way

- shes an agender lesbian who uses all pronouns and neopronouns! (she/he/they/it/xe)

- since all of her tentacles can function as arms/hands she is VERY good at multitasking

- her and twuwawa should be dating i think. dont ask me how canon it is idk either. they were coworkers on a specific experiment though..... oh my god they were coworkers ?!

- if u cut a smaller chunk of her limbs off (instead of the whole damn thing) itll just become its own creature. kinda like an earthworm. as long as it has a mouth itll stay alive!

- i dunno what she feeds on really. i was thinking water..... kinda like a nyororo..... but i already have an orikero w tiny nyororo like creatures! thats chokoko :] another contender is blood..... so she would be like a LEECH!!!! idk tho

- my voice claim for it is gir from invader zim...... odidi is already voiced by zim so it makes sense to throw gir in there too i think. even if pazaza n odidi barely interact its still funny. also gir does kinda fit her from personality..... theyre both stupid and chaotic. the only difference is that pazaza is more evil

- her idiocy doesnt exactly ruin her competence as a scientist though. she never really fucked an experiment up unlike some others🤔 and the fact that shes pretty much emptyheaded should be a positive for KOORAS really. u cant feel bad about ur past actions if youre incapable of thinking about them in the first place. many KOORAS workers are full of regrets but he is not one of them! i feel like that would make her kinda impossible to ever redeem though🧐

OH YEAH I FORGOT TO MENTION THIS AT THE BEGGINNING KOORAS is basically just THE big bad science organization..... the letters DO stand for something but i think that its pretty dumb so am not gonna say what it is..... u can read it as keronian organization omega ruby alpha sapphire if u want to though

i would go over the other members too but i dont really have da energy to ..... rip to odidi n twuwawa u both r my faves but unfortunarely pazaza stole ur spotlight this time

[benene-the-banana]

This is what I have for my BBS AU (so far this is still a huge wip)

So not too long ago i made a post saying that i wanted to make a evil sides bbs au. Now this isnt technically “creating” a au bcuz this already exists but this is just a take on my version of it. I will be adopting some ideas and making them into this au.  Or just trying to come up with my ow ideas. I may have trouble coming up with names for them so if you want to help me out I will gladly take it and give you credit because gee I didnt think that much through when i thought of making my own take on this au idea and i would very much so appreciate it. You are not obligated to help me tho. But anyways enough chit chaat from me and you can now red my ideas or adopted ideas for this au

Hoodini (Evil Vanoss) - I REALLY LIKE THIS IDEA. Ive seen quite amount of fanart of it and ive been aware of him for maybe around 3 years now. I think this is such a cool idea for a evil side for Evan. If it wasn’t already obvious enough then Hoodini is a joke Evan made about what do you call a magic owl. Then people started drawing Hoodini as Vanoss fanart. Then eventually there was the idea for Hoodini to be a evil side and be a evil magician.

Delirium (Evil Delirious) Now I know this is what people like to call 2P! Jon and I understand and respect that but I just simply like the idea of him being Jon’s evil side better. This was also inspired by a joke Vanoss made too. It was on a gmod scary map if i remember correctly and on the screen it said Delirium and Jon kept saying it was supposed to say Delirious but Vanoss said something about it being Jon’s evil brother. Well what if instead of the evil brother hes the evil side XD  I'm already expecting hate from this one kinda knowing how ppl are. Please understand that i will not be mean if you like Delirium better as 2P Jon.Believe as you wish. I will like this idea and you can like that idea. 

Ecil Nogla ( The only actual kinda canon one as far as I’m aware of ) He has actually made 2 appearances. He made a short appearance as one of the traps in a seperate death run map that wasnt his own. Not much is knwon about him other than his design and that Evil nogla was the name given to him by Moo I’ll put the links to those videos and a extra thing of how I some how got my friend to hate Evil Nogla because to me that story is really funny.  https://youtu.be/Yb_5L73qgf8 https://youtu.be/82jrdorqGWg https://aminoapps.com/c/thebananabussquad/page/blog/please-forgive-me-for-this/0D4v_wKikuKqpKVln2W4qXw58Y8Zxb4#comment-list

Erroriser (Evil Terroriser)  Well i couldnt think of a better name for this its dumb i know but itll have to do for now. So for Brian I imagine his evil side being like a computer virus or like a hacked program because eya know his character is a cyborg. I thought that could be an interesting idea for Brian. Masked Murderer or Masked Killer?? (Evil Ohm) All i have are horrible name ideas for him. I tried going with the MaskedGamer name to try to come up with since that was easier a evil side name but those are hard to come up with. 

Anti-Wildcat ( Evil Wildcat ) Ive actually seen this one as a fanmade one honestly. I like the idea and the design its easier on me to not have to workshop a name SO THERE YA GO XD 

Thats all i got so far. 

All credit for certain ideas and names go to the people that did make them.zz Im still working on their personailties and such and didnt feel like putting it here im just trying to get names and ideas for them at the moment

Like i said earlier this is my take on the evil sides au. You dont have to agree or like my ideas or my take on it this is just for fun.

[fairycosmos]

Hey, im really stuck and I was hoping u could give me some advice. So a cowrker and I made out and I confessed tht i liked him but he didnt want a relationship. And I kind of got upset tht things didnt go how I wanted it to go; but then some months later I basically asked him for something casual and i now regret it bcuz its not who i am. We didnt do it and we hvnt spoken since but I wanted to apologize for tht, for the way i had been acting. Im afraid he wont hear me out cuz he thinks im fickle

hey love. well, if you want to apologize then all you have to do is reach out to him, maybe through social media or something. and just explain to him that you were in a weird place, say sorry and take responsibility for whatever you feel guilty about, and then try your best to move on. it doesn’t have to be a big deal if you dont want it to be. it’s natural to be a little embarrassed, and to feel a bit odd about opening up to him, but if you feel the need to do so in the first place then it’s a sign that you should. all it takes is one moment of dumb bravery and shamelessness. put your ego aside for a while and just shoot him a message. you honestly can’t control how hes going to react to the apology, that’s out of your hands, but you CAN control whether or not you own up to your actions/words, and that’s what counts the most. if he doesn’t want to hear you out then that’s on him, you can’t do anything about it. there’s literally only so much you can do, but dont let that stop you from doing what you believe to be the right thing. i’m not sure what you feel bad about, i mean you dont owe him anything and it’s not like you made any sort of commitment to him, but if you need to talk to him in order to get some closure then that’s totally understandable. we all do/say things we regret, and it’s somewhat normal to act sort of unlike yourself when you really like someone and you want to impress them or whatever, so dont crucify yourself too much for it. use this situation to learn and to grow as a person, so that next time you find yourself in that situation, you know how to handle it. :) you’ve got this okay !! i’ll be rooting for you, and i hope he hears you out because it’s really mature of you to apologize and i’m proud of you for putting someone elses feelings above your own. if you want to talk about it properly or if you need a friend, just let me know, i’ll be here :) 

[lycanstonebutch]

for the questions!! 16, 17, 58, 68!!

HIHIHI CATBOY NICE TO SEE U AROUND THESE PARTS OF THE FOREST.

15. Do you have any of your own nudes on your phone right now? Yes i do,,, I have both some of mine and some of Sapphe's since we share a phone. AHAH ( I realized you asked me 16 17 but i already answered... so free bonus answer )

16. Do you have anyone else’s nudes on your phone right now? I feel like i try to avoid saving ppl's nudes bcuz it makes me feel creepy, i think ive never saved anyones nudes for any horny reasons ive only ever saved nudes art art references or to reference an OC? And i try to delete them afterwards AHAH

17. Do you have anyone from Tumblr’s nudes on your phone right now? FOR THE SAME REASONS AS ABOVE YES AND NO... I think i get way too scared of being creepy and if im ever like.... rlly rlly gay abt a picture i'll just go back to the post my mutual made and look at it again,,, but tbh i rarely interact with pictures overall bcuz even if im encouraged or told its fine im always more scared of being creepy. IDK!!! I mean smtimes im worried about interacting with ur pics cuz im like. Hope he doesn't think im being WEIRD and EVIL and FUCEKD up rn. 58. Do you have any recurring fantasies you keep coming back to? Do you think they’ll ever happen? Oh like a lot, I think one of my favourite is really like.... flustering someone until they get really dizzy and buzzy in the head and they're like so horny they start getting all 🥺 Another one is. Breeding..... the idea of bending someone over particularly grabbing their hips and fucking into them and feeling the way they feel around me, the way they feel around my knot, and seeing how good they feel once I cum inside them bcuz they want me to.. Hot. And a third one would be consensually intoxicating someone as a planned lil thing, but specifically in the context of petplay. I like the idea of using it as treats until they get so high and buzzy they're all confused and needy and I can just guide them further into the scene. I'd wanna know what their usual limit is though beforehand, lots of talking would have to go into it but theres just smth so hot abt both knowing you're getting the other completely blissed and high out their mind and soon they'll be a buzzy dumb needy lil thing behaving like its in heat bcuz all they can think about are the thoughts I'm putting into their head and that is 'You're a poor thing in heat and im here to help' SORRY FOR THE LONG ANSWER... 68. Admit something sexual that you’ve never told anyone else before. Mmmmm Im pretty open about my fantasies or sexual stuff so i can't think of anything i haven't told at least ONE person before.... maybe mmm, im kinda into sheathplay? Like. There is smth hot abt the sheath part of having a werewolf cock. I also just think overall the gender euphoria of fur is amazing and there's this one scene in beastars, the scene where Haru misunderstands the context and starts undressing Legoshi- okay she puts her hand on his stomach and softly compliments his fur and says she wants to see if its the same color below. That scene killed me, like in many ways ITS SO EMBARASSING TO ADMIT. BUT LIKE IT GAVE ME?? SM GENDER ENVY?? THAT I ALMOST STARTED CRYING?? BUT ALSO THEN I GOT SO HORNY IMAGINING SOMEONE SAYING AND DOING THAT TO ME. OKAY THERE. I DONT THINK IVE TOLD ANYONE THAT BEFORE>

[br1ghtestlight]

I asked for tinimmy cause i love them BUT I also like the zeke and Tina ship(can't remember their ship name for the life of me) so do you got any headcannons for them?

honestly i dont know how to answer this bcuz i feel like everybody has such a specific fanon idea of them in their heads?? like canon tina and zeke is VERY different from fanon tina and zeke (not a bad thing especially bcuz they're usually written to be older and more mature in fanon) but im gonna try and stick to their actual canon friendship as its portrayed in the show :)

neither of them are smart but they usually get okay grades in different classes (tina is better at english and science, zeke does better in math and history they're both solid B+ students in those classes) so they will often help each other with homework they're stuck on or help each other cheat off their schoolwork lol

tina originally attended zeke's wrestling matches for jimmy jr (obviously) but after they become better friends she starts cheering for him too!!!! he's always trying to impress her by using super complex moves that he isnt really that good at and he ends up getting his ass handed to him but tina still thinks he's amazing

jimmy jr will sometimes ask to hang out with both of them and get frozen yoghurt or smth and just completely forget or leave midway through their date (love this boy but he is dumb as HELL zero thoughts inside his head) which left them in an awkward "we're both friends with the same person but not with each other and now our mutual friend left us alone at a party what do we do" situation. this also happens frequently at tammy/jocelyn parties and get togethers so they've gotten pretty good at making awkward small talk and thats kinda how their friendship begins

tina will NEVER stop playfully arguing or teasing zeke even after they're good friends he doesn't mind it but they're always jokingly fighting w/ each other. nobody can ever tell if they're serious or not

tina doesn't have the biggest appetite and zeke has a HUGE one (and he doesnt always get as much food as he maybe needs when he's at home) so sometimes tina will give him half of her lunch and they'll eat together. gene is very offended that she didnt offer to him first but she reminds him that they literally live together and share food ALL THE TIME (and he shares with louise most of the time anyway)

tina also sometimes brings snacks to school that she knows zeke likes and she buys them at the store :) she shares during recess

zeke walks her home sometimes after school (usually with jimmy jr louise gene etc there as well bcuz tina cant really walk home without them) and they'll just laugh and tell jokes together!!!! they have a very similar tense of humor and a very teasing relationship so its easy for them to get along <3

[citrus-feline]

ppl really are just like “lol ur just sad bcuz ur not allowed to be lazy” when mentally ill & disabled people complain about capitalism making them actually want to commit suicide because it makes us all seem like burdens.

how can you have such a lack of empathy?? for a fucking Second just imagine what it would be like from that persons perspective before telling them that they should suck it up and just do it (somehow?? despite their situations making that near impossible, if not outright).

idk what to tell you if you think that this is a thing that is okay to let happen. it is not uncommon to any degree for people in this type of situation to feel like a burden and to consider things as drastic as suicide. that isn’t uncommon. that happens, a lot. but you’d rather believe that we are all in some kind of evil group of dumb kids who pretend just because they want to be lazy??? there are kids who do that, yeah, but the majority of people who complain about this kind of thing aren’t like that.

you can continue to tell us that we are awful people for thinking this way, and i want you to know that it isn’t helping. you saying that shit is upright making it worse. even if it WAS true, what is the point of saying it? you are implying that people who go through this Deserve to feel like burdens and Deserve to want to commit suicide, even if that wasn’t your intention. that is what we see when you type that out.

you all act like we never have tried and we are just sitting with our unknowing perceptions of how things work, but let me tell you that almost all of us have tried, multiple times at that. finding a job with these circumstances in the first place is incredibly difficult. i can sometimes do an okay job at getting people to believe that i’m normal because my appearance isn’t really affected by what i go through, while other people don’t have that grace. and even then, even when i was hired after months and months of searching and being turned down over and over and over because my personality wasn’t what they wanted..... my employer would eventually learn that i am not normal. it’s Really hard to hide that type of thing when it affects you every single day of your life, turns out.

even taking the horrible process of getting hired into account, people will act like when you are hired that you are good and it’s all easy from there. it isn’t. it really isn’t. i worked as long as i did for my past jobs because i went in thinking that everything wrong with me would go away when i finally got to that point. because that’s what people act like. unfortunately, that isn’t how it works. i would find myself dreading work after a month or two. by the third month i would consider suicide nearly every minute on the job, to the point of me getting so scared that my employer would notice and i would get fired or i would end up quitting because i don’t want to die just yet.

you can go on and on about how young adults these days are just too sensitive and don’t understand anything, but like... im starting to think that everyone from older generations that felt this way just... died? killed themselves? or couldn’t find a job and ended up on the streets? you know that tons of homeless people are mentally ill or disabled to some extent, right? you know that, right??? and even with all of that you still continue to say how entitled we all are when we literally just want to survive.

my dream for what i want my future to be isn’t crazy or over the top. i just want to live with my boyfriend, get married in a few years, and maybe try to go to school when i feel ready. my goal in life is to just be happy. it isn’t to be rich or famous like you all seem to think it is. i just want to survive with the person i love. i want to be happy. why is that such an awful thing to want? how am i a bad person for wanting to be happy?

im quiet and always do as im told. i dont go out of my way to make things hard for other people. yes, doing things can be really hard for me, and they normally are. but ill end up doing it, it just might take a while. the problem with how things work is the expectation of happening fast and without issue. i’ve always done things slowly because of how much thought i put into everything. it has always, even since i was very young, difficult for me to work myself towards doing something.

this isn’t something that developed during high school like so many people seem to assume. i’ve been depressed and anxious for as long as i can remember. i remember being REALLY weird when i was very young, and that’s because i didn’t understand what was wrong with me. i was miserable most of the time, even as early as elementary school. i feel like i didn’t ever have the happy, lazy experience that everyone assumes i’m trying to keep in my life. i can’t keep that if i never had it. and even if i could somehow make it happen, it hasn’t. i’m in a pretty understanding situation with my boyfriend, and i’m given time to do things. he understands how hard things are for me, and doesn’t automatically just call me lazy like everyone else seems to. it makes me feel like i have some kind of worth.

isn’t it depressing to think about the fact that i will often find myself thinking that i am worthless because of the lack of what i do? i will find myself looking at me at the core and think “yeah this is worthless, and it should be thrown away”. even when i do well i think this way. nothing is ever enough, and no matter how hard i work to ignore it, my issues won’t magically vanish. i WISH they did. and i’ve tried so hard to make that happen. but it doesn’t. this isn’t something that is simply just a made up problem that i’ve convinced myself to believe. i was suffering from this before i even knew you COULD be like this. i just always thought that i was weird and broken and unlovable and... worthless. even as a kid. i tried the same tactic of making myself do tons of things in order to try to make it go away, but it didn’t work. being the smart kid never worked. being the kid who really wanted to have fun and play but assumed i couldn’t because i needed to work harder to be ‘normal’ like all the other kids Never Worked. i never had more than 5 friends at a time for the large majority of my school life. that got a little better in high school when i started to accept whats wrong with me, but even then it was still pretty bleak.

i just. i don’t get how people can come on here, look at a post written by someone struggling for other people struggling, and then tell everyone who agrees with it that they are all just lazy and awful people. does that make you feel good about yourself? you know that we all already know that we are far from normal, right? i know only one or two people who have gone through this all without mental illness or disability contributing, but so many more who experience it with those things being the core.

if you hate disabled and mentally ill people, just say it. because you acting like you are morally superior because you are lucky enough to be able to tolerate the work environment of today is obviously how you feel. we know that people hate us. we do. i’ve been verbally abused plenty over this exact thing, from lots of different people acting like they “know the best” for me.

please just. stop talking to us if you are so unwilling to listen. we listen to you constantly. its a rare case to come across other people being loud about this type of thing without outright looking for it. if you look for it, you can find it, but i wouldn’t have ever thought to do that for most of my life. the only reason i learned what was wrong with me was because a school counselor in middle school got so concerned for me that she made me see her once a week to talk about how i see the world. and turns out, most people DONT see it the way i do! wow! sounds stupid but i actually had NO idea that i saw things so differently than other people. what a shocker, right? well, it sure was for me when i was just learning then that some people have things like depression or anxiety.

im done with this post. im tired and im going to think about something else.

[matoitech]

Could u go more in depth about what u did/didn't like about the spinoff? Just curious as someone who enjoyed most of it but was a lil disappointed with the last few episodes

sure! i didnt like Hate it or anything there were things i did enjoy, i watched all the episodes, it was more that it just really didnt do it for me in a way thats kind of difficult to like. pin. i should state too that i was not going to watch it already bcuz i wasnt interested in the genderbend fanfiction characters being the like title piece and everything, but i gave the first two eps a shot and thought 'okay, i get it, this show is about simon and his complicated feelings about Everything that happened and who he used to be and who these characters represent to him about who he used to be' and then it just didnt really like, do more with that in a way that i expected or wouldve enjoyed, exactly? i like the idea of multiverse hopping and a bunch of different au versions of characters in a story, that stuff is obviously really popular right now and when its done well its done WELL. i liked how finn was characterized in episode 2. it was like, an entertaining watch, it just didnt really do much for Me, and i knew that going in. its really hard to explain like my negative feelings on something that are negative bcuz it just Wasnt For Me ykwim. and there r plenty of parts of adventure time that didnt really do it for me either bcuz it had so many writers

i read an interview w the director and writers and stuff and they mentioned that they made the series recognizing that the original fans were adult now and it was partly made for us and like having a more mature theme and everything, but i didnt rly feel thatit did that for me personally (which again is Fine), and i dont think it successfully captured like, 'more mature adventure time', i guess maybe in the sense that they can swear now? but adventure time itself is thoughtful and often more mature than it was given credit for at the time. its a kids show but a lot of the later stuff was made to just tell stories and explore ideas, whether kids like 'understood' it or not, they trusted their audience, stuff wasnt really like dumbed down. they mentioned trying not to step on the toes of the original too much too and i like did get the sense that they respected and loved the source material (some of the ppl working on it including the director were from the old team) but while the spinoff was clearly successful and ppl liked it a lot (ive already seen a lot of ppl talking abt how meaningful it was to them, and thats great, im glad it resonated for people) its like, read of the characters and world and the direction they wanted to take just wasnt really the kind of vibe i come to adventure time for, i guess? like i said it just didnt rly do it for Me personally in a way thats hard to articulate

i dont rly want to say anything like too mean abt it but ppl Know about me that i dont like Fandom Aware Jokes in media i dont think theyre charming and the spinoff leaning into that kinda stuff wasnt for me, and i get why bcuz its literally fucking named after the in universe genderbent fanfiction versions of finn and jake, but thats also something i never liked about adventure time and wouldve been happy if it hadnt made a reappearance i just thought it was going to be used to Say Something so i was curious to see where it went. so like from the start it isnt exactly for me ykwim. i dont think sailor moon reference sexyman ice king or jokes about alt universe versions of characters kissing themselves is funny. coffee shop Boy pb & marceline b plot is not interesting to me (i do like marshall's human design). i feel like not a lot of stuff Happened to me

and let me preface this next part by saying that i never got too invested in simon and bettys thing in adventure time so maybe some of this stuff WAS canon and i just completely missed it but i feel like the track they took w them and their relationship was like.. they were trying to say something but it wasnt exactly the direction i wouldve taken, which isnt a 'criticism' as much as its just, a thought , for me. i thought betty losing her shit and sacrificing herself for simon at the end of adv time proper was interesting bcuz to me betty wasnt like a completely selfless character, to me she wasnt MEANT to come off that way, she was interesting in part bcuz she did all that for simon but simon had been gone for a thousand years, she gave herself up to turn him back but didnt think abt whether he wouldve wanted that. she brought him back, but without her. its obviously tragic and i do get that like betty moving on now that simons like Safe at the end of fionna and cake makes sense but i was.. curious to see the whole metaphor w the choose ur own adventure book where the metaphor or whatever was that betty had given everything up for simon and simon had never took her own feelings into consideration or gave things up for HER and stuff, and all that about like, obsession, and uneven ground, and simon shouldve known better... and the show ending with simon saying wow damn yeah betty sacrificed herself for me and i never put her over me so i should live a good life. like okay but i thought betty sacrificing herself for him wasnt meant to come off as completely selfless bcuz it wasnt exactly? i dont think it was framed that way but again i COULD be wrong. im not gonna say that this stuff is not in character cuz again i dont Remember if this was canon to the mainline series. maybe betty was always a fan of his work and their relationship did start out uneven like that and i just forgot, i am not gonna say its Wrong. its not like 'is betty right' its that theres dif ways u can read like main adventure time series decisions and the grayness of it was interesting

and i dont say that to say like oh the focus shouldve been on Simons Feelings and not this woman who became a god for him its just like, i didnt really expect that direction of writing their past relationship, or the direction in general, and idk how to feel about it. maybe ill change my mind. maybe it all makes sense and i just didnt pay enough attention to betty and simons relationships and arcs before. what i did know coming out of the show is that i felt a little let down but i also felt like i shouldnt have expected much from something that just based off the series name was already something i expected to not vibe with THAT much

[phandomsecretvalentines]

Love; not wrong (brave)

Happy valentines day 💞💞 i hope u have a great day, where ever you are and whatever you do.

This is litteraly just 4k words of fluffy stuff (although phil’s lowkey drunk in one of the prompts, nothing happens other than him ranting about how perfect dan is, but if you dont like that stuff its the 14th. Theres also a few loose mentions of depression and feelings of anxiety but nothing dan and phil dont say themselves. Also swearing bcuz dan. Happy endings thoo, i mean its just oneshots lmao). I hope you like it tho it was v fun to write. All the prompts are from @inlovesuggest (i got their permisson).

(Also the numbers at the begining of some of them like “[10]” are what year it takes place in, if i think its important to include. If thats not there it can take place whenever makes sense but probably 2017/18)

Yeahhh hope you enjoy! @dan-matian (from @butterscotchwithwhitemalteasers)

(I’ll stop overexplaining now) ———- ———- ❝ i have a feeling im gonna love you for a long long time ❞ ———- [09] ———- It was the day after when Phil realised he might be in love.

After the anticipation, after the endless butterflies, after the sunset Skybar dates.

They were lying on Phil’s family sofa together, rewatching episodes of Buffy in comfortable silence. Dan’s head was laying on Phil’s chest as Phil ran his fingers through Dan’s hair, it was curling at the tips now.

Dan started giggling at some cheesy joke, and hid his smile in his hands. His red patch flared up, his dimples grew, eyes crinkled. He did have a pretty laugh.

Phil titled his head and gave Dan a look.

“I’m not laughing! Shut up.” Dan’s face turned red-rose as he pushed it inside Phil’s shirt.

Phil couldn’t help the huge grin that spread across his face.

“You were. But I was just thinking.”

“About what?”

“You’re kinda cute,”

“Oh.”

Dan’s face got even more rosy, if that was possible.

“And I think I might love you.” ———- ❝ The sound of your voice makes me realize everything is ok, as long as I’m by your side. ❞ ———- [16] ———- Even after years of doing tours and books, Phil still felt nervous on stage.

Thousands of people watching him live, expecting, hoping.

He knew they loved him, but that didn’t console the pit in his stomach whenever he was about to step on.

What did help, however, was Dan.

Dan being there. His slightly posh voice, his half-confident-half-slacking posture. His arm, brushing against Phil’s, as he rushed off to go do something; or just so they could touch for a brief moment.

It was almost time to head on. Phil could hear the audience and the pre-show music Dan set, he could feel the anticipation in the air.

Unlike Dan, Phil was a shy kid. He didn’t do drama, he didn’t preform. This wasn’t him.

Dan’s fingers loosely touched against Phil’s arm, pulling him out of his thoughts.

“We go on in five.”

Phil smiled nervously.

“Okay.”

“We’ll be fine.”

As long as they’re together. ———- ❝ when it works out, love is incredible. it’s not overrated; there’s a reason for all the songs ❞ ———- [16] ———- Before the past years, Dan had never cared for love songs.

It’s not that he thought they were bad, or that he wouldn’t listen to them, he just found them rather unrelatable and boring. How many times does one have to listen to someone sing about the touch of another person?

But then he fell in love.

Truly, truly fell in love. Not teenage romance, not a Saturday night hookup, not an unrequited crush. True, mutual, comfortable love.

And he found himself relating to the songs he found so boring.

Suddenly, every overplayed radio song was about Phil.

Every ‘his lips tasted like candy’ was about the specific sweet-sour wine of Phil’s lips on a loud Friday night and a calm Wednesday morning.

Every 'I could spend forever with you’ was not an over exaggeration, but rather, true.

Why wouldn’t he spend forever with Phil? It just made sense.

Every love song made sense.

He had girlfriends before, and a boyfriend too. But Phil was the first one to ever make him realise why people wished to be in love. ———- ❝ when i say “i love you” it’s not out of habit, it’s to remind you that you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me ❞ ———- Compared to other people, maybe Dan and Phil didn’t say 'I love you’ much.

They decided, after a while, they’d rather show it.

So maybe Phil wouldn’t always say 'I love you’ before bed, but he would cook dinner more days a week than Dan.

He would take care of Dan when Dan couldn’t take care of himself. Phil would always cover anything for Dan, because he knew sometimes he needed it, even if he didn’t say.

He would make sure Dan got home safe, even when he only went out for milk. He’d even go out and get milk for Dan, if he was feeling far too overwhelmed to leave home that day.

And yeah, Dan might not always whisper 'I love you’ during early morning breakfasts, but he would take care of Phil when he was feeling poorly.

He would do more editing for the gaming channel, and he cleaned up the house far more. He tried to do most of their paperwork, because it often stressed Phil.

He would put his cereal in the same place every time, even when Phil always stole it.

But sometimes they would say I love you.

Sometimes, they would wake up and breathe it into each other’s ear.

Sometimes, they would make dinner and hum, in a tone, “I lovvveeee youuuuuuuu,” while putting it on the table.

Sometimes, they would sneak up behind each other while they edited, and scream it so loud that the other jumped off the sofa.

Sometimes, Phil would whisper it to Dan when Dan was too depressed to care.

Sometimes, Dan would mutter it to Phil when he was already far past asleep.

But they both always knew. ———- ❝ those knowing looks you give me from across the room are enough to make me want to stay in this place ❞ ———- Dan hated business meetings.

He hated going outside, he hated going into a building full of near-strangers, he hated talking to said strangers, he hated trying to understand complicated business concepts at far-too-early o'clock.

He wanted to leave.

Phil insisted, always, that he could go alone. It would be fine. Dan didn’t need to be there, and he didn’t mind.

Dan never took him up on the offer, he wasn’t that selfish.

So there he was, a Monday afternoon, looking out the window and bored out of his mind. He felt like he was in secondary school again; complicated concepts, boring statistics, and an unfocused mind. What was even so much better as an adult?

Dan felt Phil nudge his knee with a foot.

“You okay?” He whispered.

Right. That’s what was better. He had Phil.

“Yeah, just bored.”

“Me too, but there’s only fourty minutes left. You’ll be fine.”

Not for the first time, Dan admired Phil’s sensibility to always bring a watch to meetings.

They had both agreed that checking your phone looked quite rude, but checking a £3 Hello Kitty watch was a lot more subtle.

“Thanks.”

Phil gave Dan a small smile from across the table, and suddenly, maybe business meetings with Phil weren’t the worst place he could be. ———- ❝ we were dancing like idiots in the parking lot to our favourite bands people were staring but your dumb smile was enough to make me not care. ❞ ———- [10] ———- //“Change, Everything you are And everything you were”//

Dan never thought he would be the one slow-dancing in a parking lot at one in the morning, but apparently love mixed with sleepless nights is a hell of a drug.

//“Your number has been called Fights, battles have begun Revenge will surely come Your hard times are ahead”//

'Butterflies and Hurricanes’ played in the background, music surrounding them. It wasn’t a favourite Muse song for either of them, but it was perfect for the night.

Phil wasn’t the best dancer, Dan could admit. But neither was he, really. And it didn’t matter. They were together.

//“Best, You’ve got to be the best You’ve got to change the world”//

People were watching them, judging, or just confused. He was sure.

But when he looked up and saw Phil’s tired smile, and felt a soft kiss press his lips, he couldn’t bring himself to care.

And so they danced, a Saturday night, in a parking lot, to a Muse song.

//“And you use this chance to be heard Your time is now”//

And Dan had never felt so content. ———- ❝ maybe i could become a morning person if my mornings started next to you ❞ ———- [11] ———- It was no secret that Phil wasn’t a morning person.

Usually, he needed at least two cups of coffee and a bowl of cereal before you could even think about talking to him.

However, when he woke up with a sleeping Dan next to him, he found it hard to feel annoyed.

Dan was wrapped all around Phil, hand clutching his shirt tightly, their legs intertwined. His mouth was slightly opened, and although he didn’t snore, Phil could hear his soft breath.

He looked so young sometimes.

Dan started to open his eyes, having felt Phil’s body move.

“Mhmm?”

“Dan, I can’t reach my phone.”

Dan’s face scrunched up in distaste, “Don’t need it. 'Have me.”

Dan pulled Phil tightly into a half-hug, pinning him back down under the blankets.

He nuzzled his head into Phil’s neck, closing his eyes as his breathing steadied out again.

Maybe Phil didn’t actually mind mornings that much. ———- ❝ your laugh reminds me of all the good in the world ❞ ———- [15] ———- Dan had always loved Phil’s laugh.

From old videos, to Skype, to in person, to on the sofa next to him at three in the afternoon.

They were playing Mario Cart 8, and Dan wasn’t having the best luck. Despite being arguably worse, Phil had won every round so far, or at least gotten ahead of Dan.

Dan had managed to fling himself off the track entirely— for the fifteenth time that day— and Phil was laughing so hard Dan worried he might burst.

Dan’s favourite laugh of Phil’s.

His tounge-through-teeth laugh, where he tried to cover it with his hands but always gave in, ending up with smile lines and blushed cheeks.

Dan couldn’t stop staring. He had caused that.

He knew it was just a game of Mario Cart, that he made Phil laugh an endless amount of times, but occasionally it just hit him.

Not to romanticize, but Dan swore Phil’s laugh sounded like actual angels. It sounded like young children playing while their parents looked on; like every good thing to ever have existed, all at once. It reminded him of what happiness felt like.

“You okay Dan?”

Dan hadn’t realised how long he’d been staring for.

“Yeah. By the way, I like your laugh. Sounds nice.”

“Odd compliment, but thanks.” ———- ❝ wrapped in your arms, I feel so safe and calm. ❞ ———- Today had been a day.

Paperwork got mixed up, a venue had a miscommunication and lost a row of seats, and Phil’s birthday was in less than a week.

It was a lot for Dan at once, and he was so fucking tired.

“Phil! I need your help looking this over.”

Phil was on the phone, ordering dinner.

'Can it wait?’ He mouthed silently.

Dan shook his head violently. He was just about fed up.

Phil rolled his eyes, and muttered 'Be right back, emergency.’ into his phone.

“Alright, what?”

Dan squeezed his eyes shut tightly, shaking his head.

“I don’t know. Wait— Yes. I do know. It just is a bit blurry, in my head. Since I’m tired. Can you just explain what they said to call them for I’m really tired.”

Phil looked softly at Dan.

“It’s okay to take a break, Dan. It’s late. We can have dinner and go to bed or watch a movie.”

“No, I need this done tonight. You don’t understand. I need it perfect.”

“Not everything needs to be perfect.”

“Yes! Shit, yes. It does—”

Dan was exhausted.

Phil hugged Dan.

Dan eased into Phil’s embrace, hot tears rolling down his cheeks.

“I’m tired,”

“I know.”

“And so stressed.”

Phil kissed Dan’s forehead.

“I know, let’s lie down.”

Phil grabbed his phone, finished ordering their food, and lay on the sofa with Dan.

Dan nudged into Phil’s arms, closing his eyes.

Phil lightly kissed him, and held him closer.

“You can nap for a bit, if you want. The food is fourty minutes away. I’ll be here.”

Dan sighed contently.

“Thank you.” ———- ❝ my hands are cold, would you mind holding them? ❞ ———- [11] ———- “It’s snowing.”

Dan and Phil were sitting on Phil’s balcony, sipping hot coco.

“It is,”

“It’s cold.” Dan smiled innocently at Phil.

“Yes? Do you need mittens? I think I have a pair—”

“Can you hold my hand?”

“Oh-” Phil went bright pink, “Sure, yeah, okay.”

He reached out and tapped his fingers nervously against Dan’s free hand, before interlocking them.

“Thanks.”

“No problem. It is really cold, actually.”

Dan laughed, “Yeah, I know! It actually is snowing out, it wasn’t all a ploy.”

Phil smiled warmly.

“I like holding your hand.”

“We are doing this for warmth and survival only, you dork. But, I like holding your hand too.” ———- ❝ Just the two of us, cuddling at late night. Enjoying the silence, and the presence of each other. I fall asleep in your chest, hearing your heartbeats ❞ ———- It was 2am, they’re watching a Studio Ghibli movie.

Or at least, they were, until the credits rolled and they were too lazy to pick another one.

So now, they were lying on the sofa, listening to the silence and the others heartbeat.

Dan’s head was on Phil’s chest, a grin as he heard Phil’s soft breathing.

Phil was running his fingers through Dan’s curls, twirling each one.

Dan’s eyelids slowly difted closed, and his breathing evened out.

“Goodnight, Danny.” Phil whispered, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

Dan smiled within his sleep. ———- ❝ i never want to know what life is like without you again ❞ ———- [17] ———- In more ways than one, Dan and Phil ran on parallel tracks.

Their thoughts, but their actions too. Their daily lives so delicately intertwined.

They would wake up together, one kissing the other or just the sound of an aggressively loud alarm.

They would get dressed, take showers, brush their teeth, fix their hair, in turns. Perfectly in sync. A well oiled machine.

One of them would make breakfast, or they both would. Coffee, tea, cereal. A petty argument about stolen cereal, sometimes, then a slice of toast.

They would watch TV, or an anime, but today they watched Undercover Cops. Phil wanted to spice it up a bit.

After that, they’d sit in the lounge, doing nothing, editing, or any mix of the two.

Eventually, one of them would get hungry, and they would order or cook. Today it was order, burritos from a local mexican place and salads.

After they ate, Dan would take off somewhere else to do something else. Piano, games, or random things around the house. Phil might join him, but not always. This was as much space as they needed.

After that, Dan would return in exercise clothes with yoga mats. Phil would go off to change, and would return. Either yoga or some standard workout, nothing too much, but enough to make Dan okay. Phil never minded it.

After that, they would return to the lounge and relax for a while. Maybe catch up on a show. Other times, they might film a gaming video, or even a main channel video if one was prepared.

Then one would be hungry again, and they would make dinner. Sometimes they ordered, but less and less, since Dan’s therapist recommended healthy home-cooked meals. They decided on Indian food, Tandoori Chicken and Rice, with a Stir-Fry.

After dinner, Dan would go play games, and Phil might too. Or maybe watch a show Dan didn’t care for. Maybe clean up a bit more. Always something, though. Unless it was a nothing day.

Sometime at night, they would get tired. They’d head off to bed, maybe Dan would want to shower again. They would just lay with each other, until the comfort of the other persons presence lulled them both to sleep.

They worked well together, and had done for years. It was hard to remember a time before they were each others lives.

Rarely ever alone. ———- ❝ a concept: holding hands while walking along the beach as the sun sets next to us and we kiss and we kiss and we kiss and mmmaybe kiss ❞ ———- [10] ———- After four hours, Dan and Phil had finally managed to escape from the rest of the group.

Now they were walking down the sandy beach, awkwardly watching the sunset, side by side.

Neither one really knew what they were doing, neither really cared.

The sky had just reached that violet-red-orange ice-creamed mix when Phil intertwined his fingers with Dan’s.

Dan looked up at him, pink cheeks.

They glanced at each other for a second longer, then continued walking.

“You do realise we’re literally doing that romantic-walk-on-the-beach cliché thing?”

“Yeah, but it’s nice.”

“It is,”

Dan looked into Phil’s eyes a moment, then softly pressed their lips together. ———- ❝ i love the way you sound at 3am and how you look when you smile. it’s addicting ❞ ———- [09] ———- It was three in the morning, and Phil had decided that Dan was pretty.

And not the flowy-hair-model pretty, but the timeless one. The one where your features are just— perfect.

Phil couldn’t even think of a proper describing word; although that may be the three glasses of wine he had earlier.

He looked at Dan’s fuzzy image through his laptop, admiring. Dan had been attempting to play piano, but gave up and was just lying on his bed now.

“You’re pretty.” Phil whispered.

Dan blushed. How adorable.

“Thanks?”

“Really. Timelessly beautiful. And sexy, and handsome and hot and gorgeous and every other good word. You’re— Dan. That’s perfect. Dan is a good word.”

Dan grinned wide at Phil’s drunken rambles.

“I–”

“And your voice, it’s just nice. Calming. You think it’s too posh or whatever but it’s not. It’s great Dan. It’s Dan! That’s a good thing. I love it. One day I wanna fall asleep to it and wake up to it and—”

Phil teared up at this. He wanted to be with Dan forever, and he knew it.

“Dan, I,”

Dan was looking a bit confused now.

“Yeah, Phil? Are you okay?”

“You’re pretty, Dan. That’s all. But that’s not all at all.” ———- ❝ being old doesn’t seem too awful when i think about growing old with you ❞ ———- [18] ———- Phil sighed, rolling over in bed.

“I’m thirty-one now.”

Dan smiled, “Yeah?”

“That’s pretty old.”

“Not that old, honestly.” Dan laughed quietly, “You’re barely over your twenties.”

“People my age have families,” Phil stares at the ceiling, unblinking. “They’re married with a house.”

“Kids don’t make you old, Phil. People have kids at sixteen, my mum had me at ninteen for God’s sake. And anyone can buy a house, anyone can get married.”

Phil leaned on his side to look at Dan. “You know what I mean—I could. I haven’t done that much, I’m getting old. I could die tommorow.”

Dan’s turn to sigh.

“You could’ve died yesterday, Philly.” He smiles fondly, “And you have done so, so, much. Really. You’ve gone to University, had three homes, have four million fans, gone on tour—there’s more to life than just domestic stuff. And if you want domestic stuff, we can do that too. Forever home, dog, eventually marriage and kids.”

“I know,”

“What’s the issue?”

“I dunno. I just don’t wanna die. I don’t want to be old, really. I don’t know.”

Dan glanced at him.

“You’re gonna be old. We’ll be old together. Like the great poet Ed Sheeran once said, 'I’ll be loving you 'till we’re seventy,’”

Phil giggles, “Maybe you’re right. It’ll be fun with you. You make things fun.”

“Yup. I’ll always love you, even when you have grey hair that you still dye black, and wrinkles, and smell like bad cologne.”

“Always.” ———- ❝ when it works out, love is incredible. it’s not overrated; there’s a reason for all the songs ❞ ———- [16] ———- Before the past years, Dan had never cared for love songs.

It’s not that he thought they were bad, or that he wouldn’t listen to them, he just found them rather unrelatable and boring. How many times does one have to listen to someone sing about the touch of another person?

But then he fell in love.

Truly, truly fell in love. Not teenage romance, not a Saturday night hookup, not an unrequited crush. True, mutual, comfortable love.

And he found himself relating to the songs he found so boring.

Suddenly, every overplayed radio song was about Phil.

Every 'his lips tasted like candy’ was about the specific sweet-sour wine of Phil’s lips on a loud Friday night and a calm Wednesday morning.

Every 'I could spend forever with you’ was not an over exaggeration, but rather, true.

Why wouldn’t he spend forever with Phil? It just made sense.

Every love song made sense.

He had girlfriends before, and a boyfriend too. But Phil was the first one to ever make him realise why people wished to be in love. ———- ❝ How dare you make me smile so hard that my face hurts when you’re so far away? ❞ ———- “Well this feels like déjà vu.”

Dan was sitting on their bed, laptop opened to Skype, smiling at Phil.

Phil was at his parent’s house, sitting on a guest bed, smiling back.

“You’re right. I have too many memories of nights like these.” Phil laughs half-heartedly.

“I probably would’ve just come with you, if I didn’t have a video to film.”

“I know. And remember to send me the file when you’re done so I can watch over it.”

“Yes, Dad.” Dan rolled his eyes fondly.

“It’s your regret, Daniel.”

Dan sighed, “I miss you.”

Phil smiled back, sadly, “I miss you too. But it’s only a few days, don’t worry. Just edit.”

“I remember a lot of nights back then, saying how one day we would never have to Skype again, yet here we are.”

“Stop being melodramatic Dan, it’s only a weekend for my mum’s birthday. We’ll live.”

“Will we? Because I swear I’m dddddyyyinnngggg!” Dan flopped down on the bed, pretending to faint, and they both fall into a fit of giggles.

“Noooo Danny! Don’t go into the light!”

“It’s too late… I can—see God… she’s coming for me…”

“Dannnnnnn! Nooo!” Phil put his hand over his heart and sobbed dramatically.

“God is Ribena Phil, but you didn’t hear that from me.”

They both burst into uncontrollable laughter at this, tears streaming down Dan’s face, struggling to catch their breath.

“Oh my god, Dan!”

“Oh my—Oh my Ribena, you mean!—”

They both gasped for air, Dan’s cheeks hurt from smiling so hard.

“Of course, how dare I!?”

Once the laughter had settled down and they were both softly smiling again, Dan sighed.

“I still wish you weren’t so far. I want to be with you.”

Phil smirked, “Don’t you mean 'I wonder how biology can explain the physical pain you feel in your chest when all you want to do is be with someone’?”

“Shut up! Why do you even remember that?” Dan blushed and hid his face in a pillow.

Old feelings, old love. ———- ❝ in your kiss, I felt at peace ❞ ———- [09] ———- Butterflies.

Dan looks at Phil, Phil looks at Dan.

Dan tilts his head to the side.

His head is beating fast, but his heart is beating faster.

Phil is beautiful.

Now or never.

Butterflies.

Two lips, just two lips.

Soft. Phil’s lips are very soft. And sweet like honey.

Butterflies and honey.

A winning combination for your butterflies to get all sticky and trapped, and for you to feel brave.

Honey is sweet, like Phil’s lips.

Phil’s lips are better than honey.

This isn’t Dan’s first kiss, but it might as well be. This feels more important.

Honey.

Butterflies.

Honey is sweet.

Phil’s lips are sweeter.

“Thank you.” ———-

[lpfreakification]

*clears throat* ladies + gentlemen, it's that time of the night again

No, not counting the remaining slices left to sell XD its another round of "wtf am i doing w/ my life?"

Art Wise:

Inconsistent. All over the place. Structureless. I have so many, if not, too many ideas + barely any energy. I keep complaining about so many unfinished wips. Atm, poses. Pages + pages full of poses + flour sacks in the doodle notebook. No matter how many i've made, i still feel unsatisfied. Dont get me wrong, they look good BUT the approaches dont give me that sense of fulfillment. Flour sacks, skeletons, basic shapes. Just... f***. Maybe this all depends on my mood too :(

Animation Wise:

A standstill :( i never did finish my "Nap 2 Hype" lip sync animation. I had other ideas as animating my OC, Trance to dance in place to study animating w/ proportions. Ceased bcuz of details (despite completing the hardest part: hair). I had an idea last weekend about animated Instagram Stories. Nope. Attempted but never came out the way i wanted :(

Job Hunting Wise:

... *sighs* i have completed + finalized thy resume... yet im hesistant. Not bcuz of future rejection. It's bcuz of leaving my comfort zone. I do have bursts or days that i wanna get my life sorted out. It worked but for a short period of time b4 i lose that spark + it all crumbles back down again X( i'm also afraid that wherever im sending my resume to, theyll be positions that doesn't match my interests or doesnt feel fulfilling. Im really scared of that last part.

Pizza Job Wise:

Now the notso-friendly coworker's gone, i'm working with people i like working w/ over the weekend. My fear @ work: becoming what i hated the most (the notso-friendly coworker). I'm trying so hard not to be like her + work w/ my weekend coworkers to establish a good team dynamic. I got Tuesdays down >:) need to work on Thursday's. Im not counting that stupid Bears game last Thursday. It'll be a fresher start. I'm nervous bcuz i dont wanna f*** this up that theyll hate me for being strict/mean or do nothing like the notso-friendly coworker did. I wouldnt call this a promotion or becoming"head honcho" as these two Tuesday regulars called it. I'll just think of it as more character development :P

House Wise:

Alone, lonely at times. I am often home alone throughout the day, whether its work or days off. Talking to siblings is scary bcuz i try so hard to either agree w/ them or say something w/o sounding dumb +/or often get ignored. Siblings have their own path + me tagging along apparently holds them back in some way. What i hate the most rn is talking down on each other. *gets choked up* at work, we're all positive bcuz we work so well together. Here at home... its a competition on who'll succeed the most. "Get a job! Get a job!" *tears up* throughout my college years i've been told that. Even after college + 2 years of serving pizzas, i'm still being told that. They never let me go on my own pace. I did so when i got the pizza job.

Parents Wise:

Eh... meh for mom + highly concerned for dad. Mom's been out + about to "church" almost every day. She believes the more she prays, the more good will become of us. I say its a little like the opposite. No mom = no food = starving, especially on work days. It's a little our fault too since idk how to cook that well. My excuses: too time consuming, laziness, saving strength + energy for work. Then again, i'm taking full advantage of Mom while i still live in this house. The dad, however, not in the best shape :( he was involved in a nearby collision that bruised up his right arm pretty good. Though he's okay + he'll settle this in court, i'm worried about his overall physical health *head aches* i have all these ideas of what he can do + when but doesnt act upon it... i feel guilty of this too. If he doesnt +/or we dont do something by his birthday in November, the thoughts of worse things will increase. It's a rough year for him...

Kickboxing Wise:

Really good! I always think that i'm my own superhero + training to become one. I've been going more in the mornings to help eat breakfast, which i struggle w/. I've established a routine to eat a bowl full of yogurt w/ sliced almonds, dark chocolate granola, + caramel drizzle. I eat that between 8 AM to 9:15 AM, leave the house at 10 AM, arrive at around 10:30 AM, + stretch b4 class at 11 AM. Monday was fun bcuz i punched quite hard during freestyle. It was something i never knew i needed that day but it worked! There are days that i cant give it my all bcuz of lack of energy, the music selection is meh, +/or everything's fine in my life atm. What i like about the morning class is the instructor's number one thing to work on: technique. Do i have fun? Yes! Is it easy? No! As long as i feel good at the end, that'll satisfy me well!

Wrapping Up:

Ok its 1:30 AM rn. I left my medicine in the kitchen. I need to get that. The headache's killing me rn. I did drink 2 strawberry coladas watching IT Chapter 2. Welp, let's do this. In the meantime, Nite Y'all!

[vehlika-pelican]

#Little Demon the Second Coming of Lavernius au - Master Chief finds out Long post maybe and im on mobile and can't do a read-more so you are WARNED: right so I'm a total spaz and forgot the most important supporting tidbit of the sangheili's misunderstanding of Tucker and Master Chief's relation: John-117 leads Spartan II Blue Team. Tucker is on Blue Team. and the sangheili are like oh these poor mammals think blue and green are the same (meanwhile reds are all the same to these dumb mandible-faces). anyways, they ask Tucker and he's like "yeah im on Blue Team, i've been a member for most of my adult life" but they don't get that Bloodgulch Blue Team and Spartan II Blue Team are very different entities so the Demon's Blue Team must logically be Little Demon's Blue Team !!!! and when coupled with their belief in family wearing matching colors dark green MC, and light (blue-ish) green Tucker MUST be related. so they think its like when theres both an adult's table and a kid's table at thanksgiving where the younger, lower ranking family members are in their area and the respectable, superior family members are in theirs but they are all ultimate seated within the same house. and imagine what'll happen as the Spartans come to discover this and it isn't at a proper debrief or whatever some Elite goes up to Master Chief and is like "i assure you, your hatchlings are well-cared for and growing impressively" or whatever and everyone on the UNSC Infinity is like "what." and some guy is like "the Spartans lay eggs?!" but no one corrects him and its a whole fiasco but the sangheili is just thinking "they make so much noise. the condition of the Demon's younglings must truly be of great concern." but John is just. "my..hatchlings?" and the sangheili just thinks he's choked up in worry right so he says, "yes! the oldest came to Sangheilios and has been trained by the Arbiter and the greatest warriors he has selected himself! and your grandchildren show much promise as well." Blue Team's like ???? but Frederick says "con...gratulations?" just in case and John goes "what do you mean? i don't have any... hatchlings?" but the sangheili thinks oh he must be an uncle or somesuch- YOU'RE NOT HELPING YOURSELF JOHN- and talks about Tucker and his very sangheili son and all the little hatchlings being kept safe on the colony world and Captain Lasky has to corale a bunch of towering Spartan IIs and aliens and intelligence people into a conference room like a herd of wild Cortanas in order to get this straight. and that's how Master Chief learns that the UNSC has been exploiting a misunderstanding in order to help interspecies relations and woops i guess you have a family now boss man but don't worry Tucker knows and we've had him playing along, don't worry he's pissed too (and we used him as part of a fucked up AI project but they say that part under their breath bcuz this man has gone rogue for AI) but he's out there liberating a colony from an oppressive regime and no he isn't available right now but- What Halsey tooketh, the UNSC giveth...back? returneth? (his family) so. the sangheili- goddamn it, Thel- developed a theory like a spark and let it burn down the whole planet. well, it can't be helped now because its been too long and we might hurt their feelings and we don't need anymore glassings, John, so get onboard please and thank you. but in the rush to clear this up with Chief and his Blue Team, the ship's crew has taken to this like just as much kindling (humans are THE gossips) and woops who knew Chief was sewing his wild oats all over the galaxy. #thotChief (i kinda regret this but not really) so ONI has to disclose some things about P. Freelancer because John refuses to do anything without as much intel as possible. so the sangheili think he had A Kid and that kid was chosen by heretics to be a savior, this poor guy was impregnated with an alien embryo and gave birth, yes he survived, but he got to Sangheilios before we got our hands on your "grandchild" and now they're too high profile to touch (Tucker must be a shrewd and clever bastard). Thel'Vadam accidentally started the rumor but it was a perfect way to smooth negotiations with them so Tucker's an official ambassador and we get access to all the things now and we're not very sorry. Master Chief just sighs and accepts his fate because peace is important and it's too established and will they ever stop fucking with his personal life? but Blue Team teases him by calling him "grandpa/gramps" "i didnt know you and the Arbiter were so close, John. when's the ceremony?" and "do you have pictures in your wallet" "you are mighty spry for a granddad." and then they learn about how many people are involved and John supposedly and really has to live with like 200 grandkids on Chorus and Son Tucker and Daughter-In-Law Carolina and Daughter-In-Law Kimball (kimbalina without Tucker involved with either one but the sangheili are poly as a species and they don't understand. they think Tuckalina happened and why would adults limit themselves to a single partner thats not good for genetic diversity although they REALLY dont get that Carolinas vagina ISNT a tennis ball machine regardless and they've lost all hope in explaining this shit) so he's got enough supposed grandkids to have several sport's teams or fill a small stadium and the teasing becomes "how was the soccer match? did you root for your grandkids or for your grandkids?" "how many minivans did you have to hitch together?" and its. fucking annoying. because he doesn't know any of these people and even if he did, John doesn't know how to have a family (aside from his team). but he has no choice now. Master Chief has to meet his "son". Meet this other Blue Team. Punch Thel a few times probably. and having a family isnt all that terrible. imma go hide now. blacklist "vehl's headcannons" if you dont want to keep seeing my stuff.