#maybe it's a weed cig
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gay machine sex or something idk i think they should be in love with eachother in canon
#hal’s art#ultrakill#swordsmachine#gutterman#they did not beat the homosexual allegations#swordsmachine isn't smoking weed this time it's just a cig#maybe it's a weed cig#I lied it isn't a weed cig#theyre gay
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There's something magical about being 26 nearly 27 and being the child free friend as all your freinds are starting to have kids
Experiences I get because im part of a close knit community led by absolute POWERHOUSES of women I consider our sisters and who consider us the fun unty for their kids.
There's also something that boils the blood when one of their baby daddies is being horrible in new ways that aren't new, the truth is just being revealed finally.
I want to punch a man in his fucking dick till it breaks.
#I may be the fun unty to the kids#But I am the vengeful force for my mom friends#I won't do shit to jeopardize pending custody cases#I wind do anything that will put mom or baby at risk in any way#But those dumbasses best be shaking in their boots#“I never see my son”#Bitch maybe rather than buying weed and cigs maybe you should be helping buy diapers! In the RIGHT SIZE#Not 2 sizes too big and the wrong brand#Have fun with supervised visits fucker
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unpopular rant of the day: It is incredibly fucking rude to go up to someone on a cigarette break/having a smoke and telling them that they're going to die/get cancer/should quit. firstable there's a 100% chance that person KNOWS cigarettes are fucking bad for you and they're making a conscious choice here OR they're fucking addicted, you nimwit, or, 2, you could get REALLY UNLUCKY and say "just one will kill you!" to a guy who survived a lethal tumor experience where every extra day of my life is a beautiful gift and each and every thing like a single cigarette or a nice quiet time in the park with my friends after work can be interrupted by a man telling me that my choices in spending this bonus alive time will result in me somehow contracting Dying Faster Disease b/c I am smoking one (1) cigarette for the first time in two (2) months as a Treat
#hm idk guy#what's gonna kill me faster the ticking time bomb in my body or a single american spirit#maybe just don't pass comments on people you don't fucking know how bout that :)#“oh murderboner you should quit smoking-” I DON'T SMOKE#I DON'T OWN CIGARETTES EXCEPT A SINGLE PACK FOR WASTELAND WEEKEND#well. i smoke weed every day. BUT I DONT EVEN FUCKING SMOKE CIGARETTES FOR REAL#FOR FUCKS SAKE LIVE YOUR LIFE IT'S SO SHORT OH MY GOD YOU COULD DIE ANY MINUTE HAVE A CIG. FUCK A RANDO. GO ON A ROLLERCOASTER. JESUS CHRIS
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should’ve never started smoking bro my singing voice is so fucked i used to be able to hit C7s like it was nothing and now i sound like a raccoon
#(weed not cigs just to clarify)#i don’t even smoke that often maybe it’s cuz i don’t sing daily anymore#chicken scratch
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💖
#I’m v v v proud of myself tbh#I talked to my parents#and literally just shot everything straight#I was like cannabis/marijuana is a plant dude#it’s so much different than a chemically made substance like cigs and totally different than crack and meth#like they want to put all ‘drugs’ in the same area#and sorry but that’s not right#weed isn’t the same as crack and meth#weed is a FUCKING PLANT#I’m sorry but I don’t think weed is a drug#I think it’s a medication#I take it for my anxiety / depression/ chronic pain/ headaches#I take it for so many different reasons other than ‘just to get high’#I was like bro buddy pals if I ever get pulled over it would be a ticket maybe and they’d take away my shit - I would never get impounded or#any of that bullshit cause I would need pounds of fucking weed and I’m broke likeeeeee#I’m never going to have that much in my life#they are just blowing everything out to MAJOR proportions and I’m sorry but it’s just fucking weeeeeeeeed#we fine#I’m all over the place#but I’m so so so proud of myself#I’m happy I brought it up and was straight and to the point#also cause I was smoking before and a little high thank you weed 💖#shut up rosie
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For Naka.. I think to other undead specifically- he hsut radiates the most rancid smell/vibes imaginable. It effectively wards others off from him.. Me thinks that smell is very much reminiscent of burning/smoked sage. It's very pungent.. and Nakaou does surprisingly not have any noticeable difference in smell (according to Takeji and Katz) but that it does smell to the left. Like he smells like a troll but it's odd. He does make sure to take extra care of himself because of his status and wears a bit of cologne at all times
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so much shit is happening at my work one of the cooks quit/got fired last week so now we only only have 4 cooks period, and one of them might be getting fired tomorrow (stupid reason) and another one will be gone at the end of summer or possibly sooner, so they are kind of like. falling apart. and theyre hiring new people for the front like girl we literally have like 12 people who can work the front we have FOUR cooks and soon possibly less. i feel bad for leaving again, even tho i literally can do nothing to help anyways and i already said i was leaving 😭
#workposting#tomorrow the boh manager will be there so maybe i'll learn something thru him#oh he got in trouble for smoking btw. he went outside to the smoke area that we have outside#specifically for smoke breaks and started smoking. and the manager got mad bc she doesnt like when ppl smoke#i think it was bc it was specifically weed. which like. how is that worse than a normal cig???#other ppl have literally smoked in the store in front of the cameras and nothing comes of it 😭 bro was literally in the smoke area OUTSIDE
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I was not born to be a cigarette fag, the odd drunk cigarette is different but after having a few my tummy hates me
Reminder to myself: stick to weed you weakling
#lemon talks#that first drag of a cig though? mmf#maybe it’s the trauma#but#I can only smoke one cig every once in awhile without feeling like scum#dream to be a cig faggot destined to be a chronic weed faggot 😔
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#today has been. such an insane day I dotn even know where to start#there is so much on my mind about my panrets and my sister and my friends and#im drunk rn btw. which explains everything#but I just dont kno whow to even begin to unpack how im feelin#I dont know where to start#I feel like im a million miles from all my friends because I AM (physically) (emotionally)#and I feel like im a million miles from my parents because I AM (emotionally)#I feel like im a million miles from help#ive been looking into residential programs and my therapist has supported this but I just have no idea how id approach this idea to my pare#parents.#bc I have in the past and like.#idk I just keep replaying this fucking memory of me showing my mom a hospital and saying “this looks like somewhere good for me"#and her saying “for your sister?” <- or smth like that. its been a year#im just. sad. all the time and especially when im drunk#me when the depressant depresses 🤯 aint no wayyyyy#but yeah its crazy how my parents are too tired to start shit to point out the obvious self harm scars ive gained since january.#shocker!!! <- this is a pattern#my parents love ignoring my self harm#im just so tired#im so tired#this is going to be a really hard summer I really need people to check in on me. hopefully#ill do what I can do talk to other people#also the urge to buy a pack of cigs is so fucking strong. I miss weed. I miss anything thats not fucking alcohol. I hate it!!! and yet#ironic my dad gave me his 30 days sober coin as a gift and now im drunk off my ass#also my ex texted me today im normal about that too. fuck that guy fr#anyway. idk. I havent showered yet tonight but I know im gonna regret it when I do. im just so sad and tired and done#its not even relapsing if ive been conisistently self harming for the past 6+++ months lmao I need to stop lying to myself. but I wont#im just tired. I want a hug. I want to stop being the one people rely on. I want to be loved without it feeling conditional#maybe I want too much and this is my punishment
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What are our thoughts on herbal cigarettes
#idk why I am so drawn to the idea rn it just seems like a good way to chill without access to weed and weird hangups about real cigs#maybe next week I am far too broke for them rn#looking at the honeyrose ones per the shoutout by rfq#they do still have like. tar in them tho#mine#personal#like genuinely really my papa just died I should be allowed a vice. gen z really are a bunch of puritans aren’t we god.
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can’t wait for this stupid class to end so i can go sit in the park and smoke
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HaShem said to me, He said little freak of mine you are gonna have the most unbearable addictive tendencies and you will have multiple disabilities that demand your abstinence from even the least harmful substances, and you will sit in your apartment distressed out of your mind sipping ramune and wishing for cigarettes and booze
#addiction cw#im gonna be honest since im not employed and prob wont be for a hot minute im tempted to just#buy some cigs and if they give me a flare up then oh fucking well#maybe they wont!!! or maybe theyll be a waste of eight dollars#i told myself im gonna buy cbd bud once i land a job but fuck dude#im having a really fucking hard night bc one friend talked about her cigar special interest#and another smoked around me whilw we were hanging out which idc i told her it was fine#and then i saw some art with characters smoking#i dont even like the smell of cigarettes ive never smoked one its like my brain just NEEDS some substance or another#like im fucking allergic to sobriety#cant have thc because it makes me psychotic#cant have alcohol because it interacts badly with my meds#cigarettes are the next legal option but that might leave me bedbound idfk#idk maybe i can just fuckin... buy some and see if it fucks with my muscles#and if it does i can give them to someone else#i know i really shouldnt but i literally just dont think i know how to function as an adult without some kind of drug in me#venting#minors dni#weed cw#smoking cw
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covid absolutely destroyed my vocal chords and i hate that bc i used to be a decent singer 🥺
#i know it’s not the smoking bc damn near every musician smoke’s weed cigs or both#like it can’t be that bc it happened to me right after covid#i used to be able to get close to whistle register i used to be able to belt#idk maybe i just need more practice but i sing all the time lmao
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I don’t think I can remember the last day I wasn’t high the whole time
#smoking everyday and then being surprised when you feel like shit when you aren’t high#it’s a huge crutch and excuse for my mental health but like slay I guess cause I don’t feel like killing my self most of time so like we#stay winning I guess#I should take a small weed break before my trip so I’m not as depended bc I don’t wanna be smoking weed while driving just bc it’s something#to do. that’s what cigs are for. and eating ice cubes. and eating in general. and scream singing sobbing#anyways yeah I think maybe I’ll#smoke this weekend and then not smoke or smoke way less next week#found this in my drafts from a couple days ago when my WiFi wasn’t working#anyways not doing this lol#just hoping for the best and starting to take my actual prescribed meds as well as weed and hopefully I won’t be so brain foggy#I say as if I don’t also have a prescription for weed lmao medical card swag
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the big apple ꩜ .ᐟ pt.1
pt.2
pairing - ellie x reader
synopsis - you've just moved to nyc and ellie's your new neighbor. she hates you though and you don't know why :((
cw - mean ellie, eventual side gig dealer ellie, eventual weed, eventual tattoo artist ellie, cigs, drinking, no smut this time but there will be eventually, swearing, reader is feminine, descriptions of outfits, uhh can't think of what else I'm new to this
a/n - this is my first fanfic and english isn't my first language so yea !! there's going to be multiple parts, I'm not sure how many yet. I hope u like it. lots of wish fulfillment here bc I'm not american and would love to live in nyc. I tried to imagine what ellie, jesse and dina would be like irl but I also just did what I wanted to do loll
Your new apartment in New York was dingy, run down and just the slightest bit smelly. But that didn’t matter. You loved it because it was yours, just yours. You were going to pay the rent and everything, and you already had a job at a coffee shop lined up for when your savings ran out.
Then there was the matter of the neighbor. You see, very often, the smell of weed crept under their doorway and made it’s way into your apartment, and into your nose. It wasn’t that you hated it. No, unfortunately for you, you loved it. You wanted so desperately to know who it was that was stinking up your apartment, and what they must be doing every time they got high.
Did they listen to music, the same kind you did? Or did they just lay there, thinking about life? Where they talking to someone? Touching someone…?
You wouldn’t be so nosy, you imagined, if you had your own weed. But moving to a city where you knew no one was complicated. Finding a plug was complicated, even if it was in New York, and it would be great if you could befriend your neighbor and ask them for a referral.
Your question about what they looked like was suddenly answered when you came out on Monday morning for your first official shift at the coffee shop. On that day, your neighbor who you’d never seen before just happened to leave their apartment at the same time as you, and as soon as you saw her, you were struck by how hot she was.
Dressed in baggy, stylish clothes, with auburn hair cut to her shoulders and tied back in a haphazard bun, she was your idea of walking sex. The place you’d be working at didn’t have a uniform except for an apron with its logo, and suddenly you felt sheepish in your dainty goodwill floral dress and sneakers.
Everyone in New York was so cool, with studded belts and graphic tees from bands you obviously wouldn’t know, that your style which had suited you so well living in your small hometown now felt boring. You’d run away to the big apple to be where the action was, to meet cool people and live a full life. But it was growing increasingly clear to you that maybe those people wouldn’t be as eager to meet you.
You turned your head to look at your neighbor, who was exactly the type of person you’d envisioned would be a part of your new amazing life. She had freckles all over her nose and cheeks, creeping down her neck. And she had a beautiful tattoo on her arm. A tattoo! The grand majority of people in your hometown were too conservative to have those, even the young ones. You found yourself wanting to trace it with your fingers…
You realized you were staring, and tried to snap yourself back to reality. Work. You were in the elevator because you needed to go to work.
You straightened up as the elevator bell dinged, then started to walk out—and tripped. The stupid old machine had stopped just below floor level, making it so that you had to step up a bit as if climbing stairs, which you hadn’t done.
Right in front of your extremely hot, extremely-your-type-neighbor. Except it didn’t matter, did it? You didn’t want a complicated relationship with your neighbor (not that you had any confidence she’d be interested in you like that) and there were so many other hot women in New York.
But when you looked back, she was smirking, and it was the sexiest thing ever. So it did matter, a lot.
At least you’d managed not to fall.
You tried to gain back composure, laughing slightly so it was less awkward. But she just kept that same shit-eating grin on her face. Then she scoffed. Actually scoffed. Goddamn. What made it worse was that her distaste for you only made her hotter, more desirable, in your eyes. You were screwed.
You realized you weren’t moving when she walked past you with her hand reaching into her back pocket. She pulled out a pack of cigarettes and did not look back at you as she walked out of the building. You wondered were she was going.
The rest of your day was anxiety inducing. You felt a growing swarm of nerves in your stomach as you were introduced to your co-workers and taught the ropes of your job. You were just thankful they didn’t have you dealing with clients yet. During the early hours of your shift, there had been a steady line at the cash register full of all kinds of people, some of them nice and patient, others not so much. You’d clearly chosen a busy spot to work in.
Then again, wasn’t that most places in New York? You smiled to yourself. Things were indeed nerve-racking, but they were also so very exciting.
As the week went on, you began to settle into the motions of your job. Making more complicated drinks was still very hard, but there were simpler manual tasks you would do were you didn’t have to think much about what your body was doing. And in those quieter moments, your mind would wander to that elevator, and the embarrassing moment you’d had.
After the inner panic at the thought of it would fade, you’d think about your neighbor. You wondered what her life was like here. What she did for a living, what her weekends looked like, if she participated in the nightlife of the city you had no friends to explore with yet. You wanted to know her name, and who her friends were, and if she had a girlfriend (because you were pretty damn sure she liked girls). But unluckily for you, you received very little hints.
After that first day on Monday, you hadn’t seen her in the mornings, nor in the afternoons when you came back home. All you had of her were those moments where the slight smell of weed rose up in your apartment, making you wish you could just knock on her door and join in on the smoke sesh.
Then Friday night came. You were spent from your busy first week and decided to stop by the supermarket on the way home to get yourself some cheap wine and a single wine glass.
It was a warm summer night, so you sat on the fire escape window in your little pajama shorts and tank top, setting down the things you’d bought next to you. You’d already opened the wine, so you poured it in the glass and took to sipping. When the first glass was done you poured yourself another, already starting to feel a little tipsy. You had just begun to drink it when you heard the sound of your neighbor’s window roll up, accompanied with a man’s laughter.
He stepped out onto the fire escape with a beer bottle and leaned against the railing. He wore clothes with a similar, baggy style to your neighbor’s. Then came out a pretty girl with dark hair pulled into a ponytail and heeled black leather boots.
“Come on, slowpoke!” she said, extending a hand.
“Alright, alright I’m coming! I was just checking my phone.” Your neighbor grabbed the girl’s hand and stepped onto the fire escape.
Girlfriend? You thought, feeling like you were deflating.
“You got a message from one of your little fuck buddies?” The girl teased.
Not a girlfriend. Oh, and your neighbor had fuck buddies. You found it kind of hot, of course. Because you were always into the girls who might as well be walking around with the word “danger” written onto their foreheads. It also did makes you feel a little weird, because you knew she wouldn’t fuck you, and even if she did, you’d just be a fuck buddy. But what did it matter? It wasn’t like you even knew her enough to be able to want anything more. Still, you felt weird.
“Clients, actually,” she responded.
“Yeah, Dina, you think Ellie would even deign to give any of those girls her number?”
So, her name was Ellie.
“Asshole,” Ellie said as Dina laughed.
Your time spent staring at her was cut short when she noticed your presence, looking directly at you. You couldn’t help but notice her grin slide right off her face. You picked up the wine glass and tasted the drink nervously.
“Hey!” The guy said, with a bright smile on his mouth. “You must be the new neighbor.”
“Yeah,” you said, hesitating. You watched Ellie’s reaction to this closely. She seemed annoyed her friend was even making conversation with you.
“Much cuter than the last one,” Dina smiled. You smiled back softly.
“Well, it’s not really hard to compete with Stinky Steve,” Ellie said, and your smile faded.
“Dude.” The guy shot her a look. “Anyways, my name’s Jesse. I’m Ellie’s friend.”
“Nice to meet you. My name’s y/n.”
“So,” Dina cut in. “Are you living alone or have you got a roomate that’s cute like you?”
“Um, I’m living alone. I’m new to the city, actually, so I don’t really know anybody yet.”
Jesse leaned onto the railing closest to your side. “Well, you know us now.” He looked at Dina and Ellie, taking a swig of his beer. “You know what? We actually came here to pre-game. We’re going to this club in like an hour, if you want to come with.”
“Jesse.” Ellie looked like she wanted to deck him.
“What? She seems cool!”
“Yeah, Ellie, don’t be such a dick. Be nice to your neighbor.” Dina poked her. Ellie didn’t say anything else, just sat down on the window ledge and looked brooding.
“So, what do you say y/n?”
You thought about it. Maybe the wine was making you more confident, but you kind of wanted to say yes. Not just because you wanted to get closer to Ellie, but because Dina and Jesse seemed cool too, and you really wanted to go out partying in the city. You looked at Ellie, who was staring off into the distance. You’d feel uncomfortable saying yes, knowing she clearly didn’t want you to go. But then you thought it wasn’t fair for her to keep you from making friends. It didn’t make sense for her to hate you so much. You hadn’t even done anything to her.
Yeah, fuck her.
“Okay. I’m just going to get ready while you guys pre-game, is that good?”
“Hell yeah!” Jesse clapped his hands. “Knock on our door when you’re ready.”
“My door,” Ellie interjected. You thought to yourself that you were going to find some other hot girl to dance with, so you could forget about your rude neighbor.
“Oh, one thing,” Jesse said. “How old are you?”
“Nineteen.”
“Same as Ellie! You got a fake id?”
Ellie scoffed. “Definitely not..” She said it under her breath, but you heard it anyways.
“Of course.” You smiled.
“Attagirl.”
Dina smiled and looked pointedly at Ellie.
You climbed inside your apartment, heading straight to your room. Your excitement was taken down a notch when you opened your closet. Jesse, Dina and Ellie were all wearing stylish clothes. Dina had on a hot club girl outfit, while Jesse and Ellie looked like attractive people you’d see at the skate park. They all looked like they’d be stopped by one of those tiktok street interviewers who would ask them to talk about their outfits. You thought about Ellie’s clothes. She was wearing jorts and a shirt with the sides cut out, revealing her Calvin Klein sports bra at the sides. You bit your lip, then shook your head, turning to the task at hand.
Your floral dresses were out of the question. You had a few basic crop tops and tanks which would do for a top, but you didn’t want something that would just do. You were a resident of New York City now, and you wanted to look the part. Then you remembered something. One of the coolest girl friends you had back in your hometown had given you a dress because you’d said you thought it was hot.
You sifted through your things and fished it out. It was a simple black dress with thin straps, but it was quite short and meant to cling onto your body. You’d never worn it before, in part because you hadn’t had many occasions for it, and also in part because you were worried you’d feel self-conscious in it. Especially because it could easily ride up and expose your ass. Whatever. You took out from your closet some tights you could wear underneath and called it a day.
You slipped it on and put on a few rings and your favorite necklace, then went back to the bathroom to put on some makeup. You put on lots of eyeliner and eyeshadow around your eyes, creating a sort of smokey eye look, then stepped back to look at yourself. Finally, you sprayed on some of your favorite perfume. Perfect. You smiled and walked out of your apartment, knocking on Ellie’s door.
Dina answered. “Oh, shit, you look hot.”
“Thanks.” You tilted your head, a little shy but happy.
Jesse came up next to Dina. “Ready to go?”
“Yup,” you replied.
pt.2
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jaehyun and non connnn
18+. mdni.
dealer!jaehyun <3
warnings: noncon, drugs consumption.
.
jaehyun's eyes roam over your body with a playful gleam in them, a cigarette secured between his pink lips. he likes the way you look everywhere but at him, as if the white polish on your toe nails is more interesting than him.
your back is leaned against the brick wall, the small space of the alleyway forcing jaehyun to be closer to you than what would be considered normal. he can almost smell your shampoo, deciphering some floral tones. unfortunately, the tobacco in the air is too strong for him to know exactly which scent it is.
originally, your boyfriend haechan was supposed to meet jaehyun here to buy from him, but when he arrived, he found you alone. haechan wouldn't take long, you said, though it's been a few minutes already and there's no sign of him.
it gives jaehyun the opportunity to look at you, at least. see what kind of girl you are.
he can tell you're the shy type, clinging to her boyfriend because she doesn't know what to do without him. so clearly, you're super uncomfy right now. it's like leaving a kitten in the wild; it doesn't know how to survive in this big, scary world.
"want one?" jaehyun offers you a cigarette, showing you the small pack that he pulls from the pocket of his jean jacket.
you briefly glance at him, then at the packet before shaking your head as a no. he didn't expect you to say yes, but he wanted to break the ice.
he puts it back in his pocket, taking a step forward. you notice this pretty quickly, eyes staring at his shoes, moving your legs to rest against the wall.
"haechan isn't in a hurry," he comments, and he knows you're intimidated by him. it's obvious with the way you seem to be glued to the wall, arms crossed over your chest, wanting to be as small as possible.
"i'm sorry," you mumble, apologizing for your boyfriend, "i swear he's coming."
your wide eyes finally look up and meet his. there's something in them that he likes, thrills for; you're scared.
scared of jaehyun.
you have reasons to be, he won't lie. maybe you're right to be afraid of the way he towers over you, of his eyes shamelessly staring at your skimpy outfit.
"he's wasting my time," jaehyun adds, the smoke flowing out of his mouth as he talks, gently washing over your face. "and i hate when people think they can fool me around."
you shake your head again, swallowing down the lump in your throat. you don't want jaehyun to be pissed, and certainly not at you. it's not like it's your fault, but that's exactly what he wants; you to think that it's your fault, that you need to save your boyfriend from his troubles.
"jaehyun, i- i promise he doesn't mean to. i don't know what he's doing, but i'm sure-" you stutter out, and you sound absolutely pathetic.
he groans, interrupting you at the same time. "you know what, maybe you could make up for my time."
jaehyun comes even closer, caging you between his body and the wall. he takes his cig out of his mouth, throwing it on the ground and crushing the end under the sole of his shoe.
"...what?" you breathe out, voice shaky.
he bends down until his mouth is right beside your ear. "i'm sure haechan won't mind... he'd do anything for his stupid weed, anyway," he whispers.
and with that, he turns you around, his hands reaching your panties under your dress and dragging them down your thighs. you squirm around, trying to stop jaehyun's hands, but he locks them behind your back, making you whimper, feeling totally powerless.
he softly tucks your hair behind your ear, pressing his crotch against your ass, making you feel how hard he is. "it's okay, pretty. i'm gonna take good care of you..." he says, humming in your ear. "bet your little boyfriend doesn't do that often, hm?"
your mouth is wide open when he makes his way inside of you, forcing his cock between your tight walls. it's painful and you have a hard time standing steady on your legs, your knees threatening to fail you multiple times.
his thrusts knock the air out of your lungs, whines and moans slipping past your pretty lips that jaehyun imagines around his girth, choking on it like he bets you always do.
he doesn't even pull out, releasing himself deep inside of your pussy as he knows you'll think of him each time his cum will flood out of you and into your panties. and it'll also anger haechan, knowing that coward won't do a thing about it.
jaehyun gently pats your pussy when your panties are back on, only kissing the corner of your lips. "tell haechan i'm letting it slide tonight, but next time, i'm taking what's his."
#nct#nct smut#nct x reader#nct 127 x reader#nct 127 imagines#nct 127 smut#jaehyun x reader#jaehyun smut#jaehyun imagines#nct hard hours#tw noncon
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