#maybe it'll be lockhart

[msalicesstuff]

POV: Quirrell loves you

Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce you to

TW: Blood

Yandere!Quirrell 😀

Free transparent for colouring

[natti-ice]

The Blind Date- Sirius Black.

Pairing: Sirius Black x fem!reader

Summary: Hogwarts annual valentines party has a twist. A test that pairs you with the best match

Warnings: written in third person (she/her pronouns) (1.6k words)

Author’s note: this is a reupload, I wrote this a while ago!

Reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated<3

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Valentine's day.

The one day of the year card and candy companies thrive. Couples around every corner, corny love songs on the radio. The perfect day to make all single people feel bad.

This year at Hogwarts they have decided to do a cupid event. Sixth and seventh years who are interested, take a test to see which student they are most compatible with. Each pair can attend the valentine's party together the following week. Most students were excited to be paired with someone, and then there was Y/N,

"Come on Y/N it'll be fun." Lily Evans said dragging her friend into the great hall

"No no, it won't" Y/N protested

"And why is that?" the redhead questioned

"Going on a blind date isn't really my style"

"Lighten up Y/N, who knows maybe you'll meet the one" James Potter chimed in as he sat down wrapping his arm around his Girlfriend Lily

"Right, maybe you won't be so lonely. Honestly, it's getting depressing." Sirius Black said strolling alongside his best friend James.

"Shut up Black, Why are you two here anyway?" Y/N asked the boys

"I came to see my Lily flower" James gushed causing Sirius and Y/N to make faces. Earlier this year James and Lily became an official couple, Ever since they've been inseparable.

"Ew. I'm here because I don't have a date this year, couldn't pick one" Sirius said shrugging

"How humble of you" Y/N said sarcasm in her voice

"Attention please students," Dumbledore announced to the great hall. Heads turned to face him faces full of wonder. "As most of you are aware, we will be hosting a Valentine's party this 14th. For all the sixth and seventh years who are interested in being paired with a date, please see Professor Flitwick for a compatibility test"

"I think it's a great opportunity to put yourself out there Y/N" Lily said wanting to get her friend out of her comfort zone.

"Fine okay I'll do it" Y/N agreed in hopes to get Lily off her back about it. She hesitantly stood up, walking over to the growing line.

She hoped that she didn't get some creep who only tries to get in her pants. Please not Gilderoy Lockhart she thought. Patiently waiting to get the test, glancing around to see all who were in line. Turning around she comes face to face with Sirius Black.

"So who do you want to get?" Sirius asks her

"anyone, I don't care" she lied

"What if you get me?" he smirked

"okay anyone BUT you" she grinned at him

"Ouch, I'll have you know I am the best date anyone could have." he said pretending to be offended

"Oh yeah I bet" she said rolling her eyes. It was her turning in line, thanking the professor as he handed her the paper. Taking it back to her table to fill out the form, pulling out a quill. Filling in the basic information, name, grade, house.

Okay, first question "what's your favorite color?" she read in her head. Easy, Y/F/C. This won't take long, she thought.

She was right, it took her about 5 minutes to fill it out. Walking back up to the table to turn in her paper.

- February 13th

The day before Valentine's Day, the results of the test come out.

Nervously a group of kids walks up to the bulletin board to see who they've been paired with. Most were happy about their partner, others were nervous, some were just confused.

Y/N saw the crowd and knew the list must've been posted. She worked her way through the swarm of people to find her name, scanning it carefully.

Y/N L/N ..... Sirius Black

You have got to be kidding me, she mentally groaned. Of all people, it had to be him. Maybe she could get it changed before he found out. Moving through the sea of people once again.

"Well, it looks like we matched after all" Sirius said leaning up against the wall with his signature smirk.

"You seem awfully happy about this" Y/N said with a questioning eye.

"I just think it's kind of funny" he replied with his hands up in defense. "You seemed so confident we wouldn't be paired" Sirius said wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

"Did you copy my answers or something?" She lightly knocked off his arm.

"Of course not, I never cheat on test" he said defensively

"Really?" She furrowed her eyebrows

"Okay okay maybe once or twice but not on this, I swear" He crossed his heart "don't act like this is the worst thing that ever happened to you"

"It kind of is" she said playfully

"Oh please, do you know how many girls would kill to be you" he matched her tone

"They can have you"

"But in all seriousness, do you want to go to the party with me?" Sirius asked slightly hoping she'd yes

"Well" she sighed "I did promise Lily I would go with a date so, I'll go with you." She agreed

"Fantastic! I promise I'll make it worth your while" he grinned from ear to ear sending her a wink.

"I'll see you tomorrow then" Y/N says walking off

"It's a date!" Sirius yells into the hallway knowing he'd embarrass her

- "Are you excited about tonight Y/N?" Lily asked Y/N walking out of their last class of the day

"Terribly" she replied with a straight face.

"I'm sure you'll have a great time, but you know what this means right?" The redhead said with a mischievous smile

"What?"

"Make over time!" She was ecstatic

"Yay" she faked excitement. But honestly, a makeover didn't seem THAT bad

- As the night approached, the tension in the air rose. Everyone was nervous about this big group date the school has decided to have. What if it's totally lame and they're stuck with awkward conversation for hours?

"Okay, I'm ready to see myself now" Y/N said impatiently, antsy from sitting in a chair for so long

"Alright alright, open your eyes" Lily told her friend

Opening her eyes allowing them to adjust, glancing at herself in the mirror. Lily had only done light makeup that enhanced her already beautiful face. "Wow. I look quite pretty." Y/N said admiring Lily's work

"You always look pretty Y/N" Lily spoke genuinely "Now, go get dressed the boys will be here any minute"

Doing as told,  putting on an outfit she thought was "fancy" enough for the occasion. It was a school function so, not fancy at all.

A rapping on the door in an unrhythmic beat told the girls one thing. James is here.

Lily opens up the door and is greeted by 2 slightly spiffed young men. "Greetings miss Evans, are you prepared for our gala this evening?" James said in a posh accent. Taking her hand and kissing the back of it gently, causing Lily to blush

"Gross" Sirius commented "Is Y/N here?"

"Yeah she's just getting dressed"

"Hi boys" Y/N said walking out of the bathroom. Lily and James head out first leaving Sirius and Y/N alone.

"I must say, you look very beautiful tonight." Sirius told the girl

"Thank you, Mr. Black" she said mocking his friend

" Are you ready madam?" He offered her his arm

"Certainly" accepting his gesture

- As one could expect, school parties are lame. Sappy songs couples awkwardly slow dance to. That one teacher who thinks they're one of the kids. And of course the infamous punch bowl.

"I knew it would be bad but not this bad" Sirius cringed

"Most of the paired couples didn't even show up." Y/N stated

"Do you want to get out of here?" Sirius suggested

"Gladly"

Walking out of the hall, they figured out why some of the couples didn't show up. They were in the halls, snogging.

"Looks like Hogwarts is a great matchmaker after all" Y/N stated not sure to believe it or not.

"Yeah I guess you could say that" The boy replied

Wondering the halls, discussing the uncomfortable things that were seen at that said "party". Eventually, the two make their way into the Gryffindor common room. A few younger students were scattered around probably catching up on homework, sitting on the couch not knowing what to do. Sirius came up with an idea.

"How about a game of wizards chess?" He asked

"Sure, let's play" she agreed

"Good, if I win... I get to kiss you" Sirius said calmly

"You're crazy" Y/N said dismissing the entire idea

"C'mon, afraid you'll lose?" He challenged

"Alright Black you're on. If I win you have to run around the halls in a ballerina outfit, deal?"

"Deal."

- A tough neck and neck game of chess with great concentration and skill led to one's defeat. As Y/N's pawn captures Sirius' king, victory overcame her.

"Checkmate Black, time to get your tutu"

Accepting his defeat and holding his deal of the bargain, he ran around the school acting like a ballerina. He actually kind of liked it, but you didn't hear that from me.

Y/N's stomach hurt from laughing so much. She was glad he didn't get upset with the deal, he was so lighthearted and good-natured. It was hard not to like him.

After Sirius retired his ballet flats, it was already late. This "date" had come to an end, Y/N felt a little sad but didn't know why.

"I should probably go to bed, but I had fun tonight, really" Y/N smiled

"I'm glad you did, I thoroughly enjoyed your company" he brought back the fake posh accent. "Goodnight m'lady" he bowed

"Goodnight good sir" she curtsied.

"I still can't believe you beat me at chess, who knew you were so good" Sirius laughed

"We all have our secrets" she shrugged. Standing on her tippy toes giving him a small peck on the cheek. "Goodnight Sirius"

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Tags: @thebiggestnaturaldisaster @madwcman @timbradfordisbae @de-duchess

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[hollowed-theory-hall]

What would have happened if Tom Riddle got the DADA job?

That will depend on which point in his life he got the job and with which headmaster.

Like, if Dippet had given him the job the first time he applied when he just graduated, Lord Voldemort would probably not exist. If Dumbledore gave Tom the job on the other hand, and Tom had to be a professor with Dumbledore as the headmaster... oh boy...

Like, these two, really don't get along.

I mean, if Dumbledore gave Tom the job, it'll probably be for a reason like keeping an eye on him, to make sure he isn't becoming a dark lord. And he'll get on Tom's nerves. He'd be watching him constantly for a gotcha moment. He'd constantly be like: "Ha, I knew it! You're secretly practicing Dark Arts and corrupting innocent students!" and Tom would have a constant eye twitch. Dumbledore won't trust him alone with students. He'd constantly find excuses to supervise him. Like, Dumbledore wouldn't let him teach, or explore magic academically the way he wants to. Which Tom will despise.

(Could be really funny to explore this scenario. It's a sitcom in the making)

Tom would probably still become Lord Voldemort and attempt to kill Dumbledore just for being annoying and not letting him do the job he hired him for. Or maybe he'd be smarter and find a way to kill Dumbledore subtly (like with the curse on the ring?). Something not noticeable to get him out of the way and keep his position.

Something similar might still happen when Dumbledore is the deputy headmaster if Tom gets the job earlier. That being said, he'd have less power and less ability to supervise Tom. Along with Dippet and other professors potentially calling him out.

But, let's say for the purpose of this hypothetical scenario, Tom is a DADA teacher after graduation, and Dumbledore isn't getting on his nerves. Nor is Slughorn or any of the other professors or students for this thought experiment.

He wouldn't really have a reason to become a dark lord.

Like, he could have all the magical experimentation he wants in the well-warded Hogwarts the ministry can't seem to trace. He has a whole Chamber of Secrets for himself to practice whatever dark arts he wants quietly.

He'll have influence and control. He's likely to pull a Slughorn and collect students with potential for key positions in the ministry (or influence in general) just because he likes having power even if he isn't doing anything with it. Like, he took pride at being able to get all these purebloods who thought themselves nobility kissing his feet.

And while I don't think Tom will particularly enjoy having a bunch of children around him, he's a good enough actor and charming enough that most students and professors won't notice. Like, this is the man who spent 10 years at Borgin and Burkes seducing and charming the likes of Hepzibah Smith. If he could deal with her drooling all over him, he could handle anything.

Like, for all appearances and purposes, he will be the perfect professor, a perfect record. Students with high grades (no way he's letting into his NEWT classes anyone with less than an O), no complaints from anyone. Like, he'd probably be content there for years.

The thing is, being the DADA professor isn't really going to stop him from wanting to learn more and from making Horcruxes. His journey to immortality wouldn't stop because he is a teacher. He's probably still going to travel the world in a sabbatical year, track down Ravenclaw's diadem, and turn it into a Horcrux. Make a few more Horcruxes still.

I kinda still see him killing Hepzibah and getting his hands on the locket and cup. like, I can see him hearing about her collection from her niece or something that is in his class.

And like, students are probably still gonna drool over him. Because Tom Riddle was the most handsome face in any room (according to one Harry Potter, at least). And we saw how some of the students were with Lockhart, it'll be even more pronounced with Tom. Except he's also actually competent in magic. So, that niece of Hepzibah Smith I mentioned is all a blushing mess because Professor Riddle is talking to her.

He'll be a super demanding teacher, but I think he'll be decent at teaching his students. He loves monologing and lecturing and he is an incredibly accomplished wizard who truly understands magic. Tom's classes would probably have plenty of practical examples because he'd love showing off and having the students look at him with awe. And we know that when he sees potential in a student he actually bothers to teach them and does it well. He taught both Bellatrix and Snape for a time.

Like, I honestly think Tom would enjoy being a teacher. He could probably go at it for multiple decades while having Horcruxes and dark arts experiments on down low. As long as no external interference is involved.

[onionjulius]

Alright so, ER rewatch is happening, but I'm swamped with work and so I'll have to wait for episode posts. For now, an initial inventory of my remembrance of the main characters/my opinion of them:

Love: Carol Hathaway, Mark Greene, Susan Lewis, Kerry Weaver, Abby Lockhart, Luka Kovač

Really like: John Carter, Doug Ross, Peter Benton, Elizabeth Corday, Lucy Knight, Jing-Mei Chen, Greg Pratt

Like: Jeanie Boulet*, Cleo Finch, Michael Gallant

Unlikeable but not devoid of complexity: Robert Romano, Dave Malucci

I remember your existence: Neela Rasgotra, Anna Del Amico

I don't remember your existence: Sam Taggert, Ray Barnett, Archie Morris, Tony Gates, Simon Brenner, Cate Banfield

*Jeanie's on the cusp between Like and Really like.

I'll be curious to see if my opinions change much watching this show 15-30 years after it initially aired. No doubt there will be cringe "Oh wow that aged poorly" moments, but hopefully also some that hold up well. It'll also be interesting to watch a pre-Prestige TV critical hit post-Prestige TV (and yeah, nostalgic, I'm getting quite nostalgic in my old age). And I'm wondering how my impressions of the characters will hold up in a close watch; I think I'm much more analytical now, and I'm pretty sure my opinions reflect the characters at their best without necessarily accounting for them at their worst. Although maybe that's not a bad thing as long as it's consistent.

More character recollections, some quite spoilery:

Mark's death slew me. It was so protracted too, he was suffering so much and his family was fraying at the seams and I just remember him trying so hard to handle things the best he could with that understated irony of his and just feeling so terribly for him. There was that thing with the guy in the elevator that he just let die, I don't remember what became of that ...

I love so much that Mark is really just Some Guy trying to do his job well while having normal Some Guy things like a wife and kids and basketball breaks. He's smart, decisive, dedicated, compassionate, a good teacher, and truly a deserving leader.

I know that Jeanie had at least one great story, which of course is the HIV story. I'm actually struggling to recall much before that, so that'll be fun.

I just ... I remember having such complex reactions to Kerry, and all these years later that has registered in my memory as love. I love Kerry, warts and all. You could feel so bad for her while simultaneously hate what she was saying or doing, and I do think she learned things over time. She was an outsider, a party pooper, ambitious and career-driven, a disabled lesbian, oil to Doug Ross' water. She was not easy to love, and so I loved her. Also, she was ER Mom. Love you, Mom!

I also loved Kim/Kerry. They felt so real and human and not simply an "issues" story. I find myself not recalling much of her relationship afterward, so looking forward to seeing if it is a worthy follow-up.

I loved Mark/Susan. They were such easy friends, so natural and believable together, so bright and breezy and (mostly) supportive and wonderful. I think they would have made a fine endgame, it was so easy to want good things for each of them, and what an unforgettable, lovely and bittersweet moment when she left Chicago on that train.

For all that though, I liked Mark with Elizabeth. It's true there wasn't the same will-they-won't they (and I remember feeling like her thing with Peter ended rather abruptly) but their domesticity was very sweet and she was a kick-ass character, strong and funny.

Romano was ... Problematic ... but his bond of some sort with Elizabeth was probably the best thing about his character.

I remember feeling that Peter was shafted, but that said he did last 8 years and I remember some good stories with his mother and sister, work vs parenthood, the custody battle, and of course (of course) his evolving dynamic with Carter.

Seriously though. Benton/Carter.

And on the topic of BroTPs: Mark/Doug!

There's something about the two most ambitious characters being Peter, a black man, and Kerry, a woman, that I kinda love.

Upon reflection, it seems to me that at least some of my affinity for Susan and Abby have to do with their family stories--particularly, having to deal with flawed family members, walking the line between loving and enabling, battling the desire to hope because of the need to protect against disappointment. It's ... interesting? ... because I don't have any deadbeat family members or family members who refuse to take responsibility for their illnesses, but something about how they use sarcasm to deal with life resonates with me, even though Susan in my head was a sunny character while Abby was a little black raincloud.

I loved Abby. Abby was a hot mess, a human disaster, a trashfire. Abby was strong, but also a coward. Abby was full of contradictions, Abby mistook self-abnegation for independence, Abby was only happy when it rained. Abby was hard to love, and so I loved her.

There was something about Abby/Luka that I found compulsively watchable. Something probably having to do with being really messed up and dysfunctional and full of maladaptive habits, but nevertheless wanting love like any other human being. There was a brooding intensity and understatedness to them that I remember just eating up. I was an undercover emo kid, what can I say.

That said, there was a phase in which he was truly insufferable (which I know was them taking a page out of the Doug Ross book ... but he isn't Doug Ross, even though he was brought on as a direct replacement). I'm curious if, on my rewatch, it will feel like an organic arc given how sweet, patient, gentlemanly and sensitive I recall him being at the start. Oh tragic little meow meow.

The final scene between Carol and Luka is so etched in my brain. "Because I'm still in love with him. I've been in love with him since I was 23 years old. He's everything to me. I feel complete when I'm with him and I feel empty when we're apart. He's the father of my children, and he's my soulmate." Yes, Doug was a manbaby and yes I was so hurt on Carol's behalf that he left her for Seattle, but really Doug/Carol were the Truth. You bought their connection so thoroughly and George Clooney's chemistry with Juliana Margulies was critical to that.

I remember thinking that Peter/Cleo's chemistry was nothing in particular to write home about (you know, not bad, but not special) ... but hell if they weren't beautiful together. Michael Michelle was just so stunning.

I really thought that they were heading for a lot of yummy Carter-denying-his-feelings-for-med-student-Lucy angst, which I was so there for. But I can't deny that what ended up happening (you know ...) was unforgettable television.

On that note, Carter was never the same after That. There's such a sad lost innocence about his character, given how earnest and caring and even hapless he was at the start. That's not necessarily a bad direction to go, narratively speaking, but one would hope for some eventual hard-won optimism for him all the same.

And yeah, at some point ER became darker and soapier, but I honestly have good memories of a few of those years, before becoming bored.

Like, another scene seared into my brain is Maggie Wyczenski turning on a dime and going postal right in the middle of the ER, screaming "I'm leaving! I'm leaving! I'm leaving! Iiii'm leaving!" and "You're my daughter you bitch!". God did Sally Field earn that Emmy or did she earn that Emmy. I wouldn't want to have missed out on that story, for all that it was such a downer.

Apparently Sam, Ray, Archie, and Tony came on more or less when Neela did, but she's the only one I remember. How'd that happen? Though I can't say I remember her stories, so there is that.

I remember watching with my sophomore year roommate the night that Romano freaking lost his arm to a helicopter. It was crazy. And I really thought it couldn't get any crazier, but then, as you know ...

The look of the show really changed from beginning to end, which, given that it lasted fifteen years, is probably to be expected. But I remember most the constantly moving camera in so many of the medical emergency scenes, and I hope that doesn't go away.

Mark's daughter and Peter's son were impossibly cute. Impossibly cute. So so cute. So so so so so cute.

Speaking of Chicago in the 90s, goddamn do y'all remember how incredible the Bulls were? I don't know why I'm putting that in this post, but I guess I am.

Carter/Jing Mei were such great friends, they never stopped being competitive with each other but they nevertheless grew up together and I love that the show never hooked them up.

I don't recall quite why but I feel like Doug and his dad were reminiscent of Riker and his dad from Star Trek. I don't know.

Okay yeah that's all for now.

[strawbrryrush]

I'm mobile, but here is my hidden valentines event starter and plotting call!! Imma limit it 3 request per mun pls, and a limit of 4 per muse so I don't cry. Anyways i hope this isn't too bad- but I'm FAR behind oops ♡♡

Elena Gilbert - going with elijah mikaleson- will be trying to get into this man's suit.. and will be drinking her aunt has no humanity on and is spooking her let her live. 0/4

Eric Northman- going with faye chamberlain- going to judge this event- clearly his club could do it better.- will be woofing and acting a fool for his wife- or fiance ?? Whatever he's committed. 0/4

Homura Akemi- going with madoka kaname! Homura; after the maze deserves a break.. and to have fun and dance with her ?? Girlfriend, she doesn't know what they are but knows madoka looks stunning - and she has butterflies. Bonus points if u get her tipsy it'd be funny. 0/4

jinx - going with stu macher! Not a shock- will probably be wreaking havoc and enjoying what the place has to offer.. im always down for jinx angst if anyone's offering :)) 0/4

nami - going with sanji!! Will be scoping the place out for some thievery - maybe don't tell sanji but come on it'll be a great investment !! Also low-key probably gonna be keeping an eye on the rest of the straw hats- they're idiots but she cares for them. 0/4

richard gecko - going with aerith! She's gorgeous he wants to eat his girlfriend up- will be enjoying his time with her. But also richie can use every and any plot please PLEASEE PLEASEEE lmk what u wanna do let's!! 0/4

Tifa lockhart- blind date with cassie ! Will be trying to have a good time- looking gorgeous while doing so. Why not get tifa tipsy it'd be fun! 0/4

lip gallagher,- going with rikki.. let's be real these kind of parties aren't really his thing- he's trying to live a life of sobriety so no drinks for him or I'll throw hands >:[ jk jk but he's trying to have a good time - even if he feels out of place. Let's make some friends!! 0/4

mabel pines,- in need of a date if any one wants to plot that! She's a sweetheart who will start a drinking game and lose and be plastered - come on it'll be fun.. imagine drunken kisses and waking up like what happened ?? 0/4

martha hatter - sunshine baby- in need of a date again if you wanna try anything lmk!! A true hopeless romantic will dance with your muse and make sure they're safe ! 0/4

nezuko kamado,- going with evie ! Her first masquerade party I can feel she's gonna be nervous, but will have fun or try to!! 0/4

harriet hufflepuff, - going with lily ! Eyes only on her girlfriend and she doesn't really do parties so they'll be ?? Awkward but lily does bring the best out of them who knows. 0/4

amber freeman , - going with Tara! A party girl at heart is gonna love this! Will try to be on her best behavior she doesn't wanna lose her gf buuut it's such a great opportunity for some stabby stab.. but alas she'll be good or try. 0/4

misa amane ,- in need of a date is a gothic baddie - will probably feel like she's making aly jealous but lbr KSLSLS she isn't but give this girl a time to let loose !! 0/4

marceline - in need of a date. A vampire Rockstar, a baddie, Will make this the funnest date ever 0/4

elaine st john, - going with henri.. going to be reserved - unless she gets hungry.. plenty of options u know - what's a little blood break. 0/4

harley quinn, -unsure of her date status! Pure chaos as usual- will be getting wasted and messing around. 0/4

edward elric,- went with ling as pals no homo! He's gonna stick out like a sore thumb - the coat stays on >:[ ur lucky he put on a suit.. it 100 percent ill fitted and is too baggy on his legs, but sh; he will be a grump. He doesn't want to be here.. but alas he's here and no short jokes unless u wanna lose ur knee caps.. or ur ankles 0/4

knives chau, - in need of a date.. legit give her a fun and pure time. 0/4

princess peach- in need of a date.. will be having fun! 0/4

Yor forger - going with shanks! Dressed like a goddess- kind of nervous but once she drinks.. it's signing up for disaster - will probably break some things on accident because she doesn't know her own strength. 0/4

Himi , - in need of a date.. a legit fiery sunshine - give her a nice date night ! 0/4

tabitha haworthe ,- in need of a date ! Will be fun! Ur muse will learn horror movie facts! 0/4

azula, -in need of a date is horribly jealous that Cindy has a date that isn't her.. but wont admit it might accidentally light a curtain aflame.. idk it'll be fun 0/4

isabelle, - needs a date- my baby girl is so cute needed a break from work.. maybe get her tipsy 0/4

draculaura , - needs a date... a vegan vampire who's the sweetest I swear she'll make a great date!! Tho she might catch feelings a little fast- shes a hopeless romantic like that. 0/4

Samantha giddings,- blind date with Zola!! Going to feel ridiculous she even did a blind date but will make the most of it!! 0/4

beth greene - blind date with Melissa! Pure pure angel- I don't think she's ever been to a dance before- deserves a wonderful time 0/4

Calcifer- going with drizella! U can't miss them he's in a red suit- will have a lit time.. punns idk 0/4

Carmy'- going with Sydney! Thankfully so he doesn't do fancy parties - he's stressed- count how many smoke breaks he's take.. u already lost count - will be confused on why he thinks sydney looks gorgeous but like all his emotions that shall be bottled up. 0/4

[blackcurlsgreeneyes]

As the Moon Sheds Its Shadow // Closed RP

@fidelixcorde

The announcement had gone up on all common room boards the day of, making it rather abrupt. But it had everyone excited enough that word spread, so Harry had no doubt that the Great Hall would be quite full despite short notice. And even those who might not have been inclined to join a Dueling Club were talking about it, clearly intending to attend, presumably because of the same fears that had prompted the staff to implement it to begin with.

"What, they reckon that Slytherin's monster can duel?" Ron asked dryly as they left study hall after dinner had been over for an hour, heading back downstairs among the throng. "Still, it'll be useful for more than just this year, I reckon."

"Considering that you two wound up accepting a duel from Malfoy last year with limited spell education, let alone dueling training," Hermione snorted, "yes, I think you might need it."

Harry frowned. "Huh. That reminds me, he's been quiet this year, hasn't he?" he asked as they entered the Great Hall. As if conjured, he spotted the blond across the room, sitting on the small risers that had been raised around a candlelit golden stage stretching the length with Pansy Parkinson, Theo Nott, and Blaise Zabini. His usual guard dogs were sitting off on their own.

"Maybe even he has to admit that You Know Who coming back wouldn't be ideal," Ron muttered as they took their places along the stage.

"I wonder who‘ll be teaching us?“ Hermione mused. "Someone told me Flitwick was a dueling champion when he was young—maybe it‘ll be him.“

"As long as it‘s not—" Harry began, but he ended on a groan: Lockhart was walking onto the stage, accompanied by none other than Snape.

Lockhart waved an arm for silence and called "Gather round, gather round! Can everyone see me? Can you all hear me? Excellent! Now, Professor Dumbledore has granted me permission to start this little dueling club, to train you all in case you ever need to defend ourselves as I myself have done on countless occasions—for full details, see my published works. Let me introduce my assistant, Professor Snape! He tells me he knows a tiny little bit about dueling himself and has sportingly agreed to help me with a short demonstration before we begin. Now, I don‘t want any of you youngsters to worry—you‘ll still have your Potions master when I‘m through with him, never fear!“

Lockhart and Snape turned to face each other and bowed; at least, Lockhart did, with much twirling of his hands, whereas Snape jerked his head irritably. Then they raised their wands like swords in front of them. "As you see, we are holding our wands in the accepted combative position, “Lockhart told the silent crowd. „On the count of three, we will cast our first spells. Neither of us will be aiming to kill, of course.“

Both of them swung their wands above their heads and pointed them at their opponent; Snape cried, "Expelliarmus!“ There was a dazzling flash of scarlet light and Lockhart was blasted off his feet: He flew backward off the stage, smashed into the wall, and slid down it to sprawl on the floor.

"Do you think he‘s all right?“ Hermione squealed, watching through her fingers.

"Who cares?“ Ron laughed. Lockhart was getting unsteadily to his feet. His hat had fallen off and his wavy hair was standing on end.

"Well, there you have it!“ he said, tottering back onto the platform. "That was a Disarming Charm—as you see, I‘ve lost my wand—ah, thank you, Miss Brown—yes, an excellent idea to show them that, Professor Snape, but if you don‘t mind my saying so, it was very obvious what you were about to do. If I had wanted to stop you it would have been only too easy—however, I felt it would be instructive to let them see…“

Recovering, Lockhart went on, "Enough demonstrating! Time to give you students a chance..."

[braveclementine]

Chapter 12

Warnings: None, Readers under 18 can read this book. It is solely fluff- nothing sexual

Copyright: I do not own any Wizarding World characters that J.K. Rowling wrote. I do however own Elizabeth Kane (main character) and Trang Nyguen (best friend). There should be no use of these two names without my permission. I also do not condone any copying of this.

.💚💚.

𝕬𝖙 𝖊𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙, 𝕴 met Harry, Hermione, and Ron at the entrance of the Great Hall and then we went in together. Fred, George, and Lee were there too along with multiple other Gryffindors. In fact, I was fairly certain every Gryffindor was here.

The Great Hall looked very different than I was used to. The four house tables were gone and there was a golden stage along one wall. The candles still floated overhead but the ceiling that usually reflected the weather outside had been turned off, revealing only the stone arches that the roof was constructed of. I wondered why that was.

A large majority of the school was packed in here, though I didn't see Cedric or any of the older Hufflepuffs. Heidi had come and had dragged Malcolm with her who looked sulky. Ernie and Zacharias were standing with Hannah, Susan, and Leanne.

"I wonder who'll be teaching us?" Hermione asked excitedly as we pushed our way through the crowd to get to the front row. "Someone told me that Flitwick was a dueling champion when he was young- maybe it'll be him."

"As long as it's not-" Harry started and then groaned as Lockhart walked onto the stage, accompanied by Snape. They looked like the most unusual couple. Lockhart was wearing robes of bright plum while Snape wore his usual black.

Lockhart waved his arm for silence, something he immediately got though there were some giggles from the girls. Bloody hell. "Gather round, gather round!" Lockhart called unnecessarily as everyone was already crowded around the golden stage. "Can everyone see me? Can you all hear me? Excellent! Now, Professor Dumbledore has granted me permission to start this little dueling club, to train you all in case you ever need to defend yourselves as I myself have done on countless occasions- for full details, see my published works."

I groaned, putting my head in my hands. Did he ever not talk about his books? Sure, he'd done some great stuff, but what a bragger!

"Let me introduce my assistant, Professor Snape." Lockhart continue. "He tells me he knows a tiny bit about dueling himself and has sportingly agreed to help me with a short demonstration before we begin. Now, I don't want any of you youngsters to worry- you'll still have your Potions master when I'm through with him, never fear."

I started to giggle and I covered my mouth with my hand. I'm sure he had 'sportingly' decided to kick Lockhart's arse.

"Wouldn't it be good if they finished each other off?" Ron hissed in Harry's ear. I overheard and giggled harder. I needed to get a grip on myself. I pinched my lips together and looked up. Snape's lip was curling. His eyes flicked over for the briefest second to meet mine. I wasn't sure what my face looked like, probably amused.

They turned to face each other and bowed. Then, they raised their wands and I had a mental image of them starting to fight with their wands like swords. This brought on another onslaught of giggles. I needed a silencing charm done on me.

"As you see, we are holding your wands in the accepted combative position. On the count of three, we will cast our first spells. Neither of us will be aiming to kill, of course." Lockhart said, motioning to their uplifted wands.

"I wouldn't bet on that." Harry muttered. I giggled for what was probably the fourth time, watching Snape bare his teeth.

Both of them swung their wands over their heads and pointed them at each other. Snape yelled, "Experlliarmus!" while Lockhart said nothing at all. There was a bright scarlet light and Lockhart was blasted off his feet. He flew backwards off the stage, smashed into the stone wall, narrowly missing a torch light, and slid down it to sprawl on the floor.

I jumped into the air and cheered. It was more epic in real life than it had been in the vision!

"Do you think he's all right?" Hermione squealed, looking through her fingers.

"Who cares?" Harry, Ron, and I all exclaimed together.

Lockhart got unsteadily to his feet. His robes were ruffled, his hat had fallen off, and his wavy hair was sticking out like a cat in water.

"Well, there you have it!" Lockhart said, walking back up to the stage. "That was a Disarming Charm- as you see, I've lost my wand- ah, thank you Miss Brown-" He said as Lavender Brown handed his wand to him eagerly. "-yes, an excellent idea to show them that, Professor Snape, but if you don't mind me saying so, it was very obvious what you were about to do. If I had wanted to stop you it would have only too easy- however, I felt it would be instructive to let them see."

I snorted. Snape's face contorted into a look that could quite literally kill. It was perhaps possible that Lockhart may have finally noticed as he decided that it was now time to pair us up so that we could practice with each other.

Snape reached Harry, Ron, Hermione, and I first, sneering down at us. I folded my arms. I wasn't afraid of him. "Time to split up the dream team, I think." He sneered. "Weasley, you can partner Finnigan. Potter-"

Harry immediately moved closer to me and then towards Hermione, unsure who he was going to be partnered with.

"I don't think so." Snape said, his smile broadening. "Mr. Malfoy, come over here. Let's see what you make of the famous Potter. And you Miss Granger- you can partner Miss Bulstrode. Miss Kane, you can partner with Miss Parkinson."

He wasn't showing any favoritism now. I watched the three Slytherins strut over. Bulstrode was one ugly girl. I said so out-loud. Harry snorted but I felt a sharp flick on my ear. My hand flew up and I turned and glared at Professor Snape. He glared down at me. I smiled at him. He stared at me for a second, colour coming into his face, and then looked away.

I walked some paces away and Pansy Parkinson and I faced each other. I wondered if she would actually try to disarm. Slytherins didn't particularly have a problem with Hufflepuffs but considering I was friends with Harry. . .

"Wands at the ready!" Lockhart shouted and there was movement in the crowd as everyone lifted their wands. "When I count to three, cast your charms to disarm your opponents- only to disarm them- we don't want any accidents- one. . . two. . . three-"

"Expelliarmus!" I shouted, swinging my arm around my head the way Professor Snape had, and pointed it at Pansy. A scarlet light came out of my wand and sent her flying. I smiled, happy to have done the spell properly first try. It really wasn't very difficult. Pansy on the other hand, wasn't as happy.

She leapt to her feet and shouted, "Locomotor Mortis!" My legs snapped together and I nearly fell over. Luckily, I knew the counter-charm. I pointed my wand at my legs and said, "Locomotor Liberari" Once my legs were free, I glared at her. "Disarm only."

"Too bad." Pansy said narrowing her eyes at me. She shot another spell at me, but this time I was ready for it and I said, "Finite." Whatever spell she'd thrown at me was canceled. Then, angry, I shouted, "Mimble Wimble," and pointed my wand at her mouth.

She started to stutter and was unable to form the words to curse me again. With that in mind, I did Expelliarmus again, this time sending her wand flying from her hand though she stayed on her feet this time. Pansy glared at me and shouted something at me, but she stuttered over her words and against my will, I started to laugh. She sounded ridiculous and I was twelve and it was hilarious to me. She stormed over to where her wand was laying and grabbed it. I wasn't bothered. She wouldn't be able to perform a correct spell with her wand. I prepared to disarm her again, but thought against it.

Snape and Lockhart were moving through the crowd, undoing people's spells like Harry and Draco. Snape wandered over and undid Pansy's tongue-tying curse. She glared angrily at me. I shrugged, turned my back on her, and wandered over to where Harry was pulling Bulstrode off of Hermione. I helped Harry pull her off and made sure that Hermione was okay.

"I think I'd better teach you how to block unfriendly spells." Lockhart said, standing in the middle of the hall. "Let's have a volunteer pair- Longbottom and Finch-Fletchley, how about you-"

"A bad idea, Professor Lockhart." Snape said, gliding over. I say gliding because he certainly didn't look like he was walking. I wondered if he could turn into a bat the way Harry and Ron thought he could. "Longbottom causes devastation with the simplest spells. We'll be sending what's left of Finch-Fletchley up to the hospital wing in a matchbox."

Neville's face went pink. I scoffed, glaring at Snape. Must he always be picking on a Gryffindor?

"How about Malfoy and Potter?" Said Snape with a twisted smile. I glared at Snape again. Did he always have to torture Harry?

"Excellent idea!" Lockhart said, the way he always did when Harry was involved in something. He gestured that Harry and Malfoy should climb onto the golden stage, but I grabbed Harry's arm.

"Lockhart doesn't know how to block spells." I whispered furiously in his ear. "But if you create a shield with your wand and say finite, it should cancel most spells. Protego will also create a shield between you and your opponent."

"Thanks Liz." He muttered gratefully and then made his way up to the stage. I crossed my fingers and waited anxiously.

Lockhart was showing how he thought Harry should block. Harry wasn't paying him any attention. Instead, he was whispering under his breath the charm I'd given him. Finally Lockhart stepped back and said, "Three- two- one- go!" he shouted.

Malfoy raised his wand as fast as possible and shouted, "Serpensortia!"

Harry lifted his wand and said, "Finite," but it was too late. A black snake was already coming from Draco's wand and fell heavily onto the floor between the two duelers. There were actually screams from the crowd. Hypnotized, I moved even closer as I felt a pull from the snake, like it was a magnet and I was made of metal.

"Don't move, Potter." Snape said lazily. "I'll get rid of it." He raised his wand slowly. This, unfortunately, gave time for Lockhart to say, "Allow me!" He brandished his wand and there was a loud bang; the snake flew up into the air and fell back to the floor with a loud thud. It raised itself up even higher, facing me at first. I stared at it with wide eyes, frozen, but couldn't move my feet. "Go away," I whispered. I didn't think it would listen. But then, it turned to face Justin Finch-Fletchley.

Harry walked forward and I heard him say, "Leave him alone!" The snake slumped to the floor, looking like a black garden hose. Harry smiled and looked at Justin.

Justin looked back in anger and fright. "What do you think you're playing at?" He shouted and stormed out of the room. Harry's face turned from a smile to a shocked face. I quickly jumped onto the stage, avoiding Snape and Lockhart's gazes, and grabbed Harry's arm, pulling him off the stage. Hermione and Ron followed us and we hurried from the Great Hall, people avoided us, even Fred, George, and Lee looked at us like they didn't know us. I looked away, unable to face that sort of look from Fred.

We made our way upstairs to the Gryffindor common room which was completely empty. Ron pushed Harry into an armchair, and he and Hermione cornered Harry. I sat down to the side of him on the couch.

"You're a Parselmouth. Why didn't you tell us?"

"I'm a what?" Harry asked in confusion.

"A Parselmouth." Ron exclaimed exasperated. "You can talk to snakes!"

"I know." Harry said calmly, looking a bit confused. "I mean, that's only the second time I've ever done it. I accidentally set a boa constrictor on my cousin Dudley at the zoo once- long story- but it was telling me it had never seen Brazil and I sort of set it free without meaning to- that was before I knew I was a wizard-"

I laughed tensely. I wish I'd been there.

"A boa constrictor told you it had never seen Brazil?" Ron asked, sounding like he might faint at any moment. I rolled my eyes. How theatrical.

"So?" Harry asked, more confused than ever. "I bet loads of people here can do it."

"Oh no, they can't." Ron said. "It's not a very common gift. Harry this is bad."

I frowned. I should ask Lupin if my dad or mum could speak Parseltongue. If both Harry and I could speak it, then perhaps it was something we'd inherited.

"What's bad?" Harry asked, anger tainting his confusion "What's wrong with everyone? Listen, if I hadn't told that snake not to attack Justin-"

"Oh, that's what you said to it?" Ron asked.

I frowned deeper. Even if I hadn't been able to speak Parseltongue, I figured the fact that the snake had stopped being angry and had laid docile on the floor was a given sign that it wasn't going to attack anymore.

"What d'you mean?" Harry asked, still angry. "You were there- you heard me-"

"I heard you speaking Parseltongue." Ron said. "Snake language. You could have been saying anything- no wonder Justin panicked, you sounded like you were egging the snake on or something- it was creepy, you know-"

I scoffed. "He told the snake to back off."

Harry meanwhile, gaped at Ron in shock. "I spoke a different language? But- I didn't realize- how can I speak a language without knowing I can speak it?"

Ron shook his head, not having an answer. Hermione and him looked so somber that I burst out laughing. They glared at me. I grinned, shaking my own head in exasperation. Harry was getting snippy. "D'you want to tell me what's wrong with stopping a massive snake biting off Justin's head? What does it matter how I did it as long as Justin doesn't have to join the Headless Haunt?"

"It matters." Hermione finally spoke, "because being able to talk to snakes was what Salazar Slytherin was famous for. That's why the symbol of Slytherin House is a serpent."

Harry's mouth dropped open like this was a bad thing. Of course, I knew that Salazar Slytherin wasn't a bad person or wizard. He'd just had bad experiences when he was a kid which led him not to trust Muggles. People do things when they're afraid.

"Exactly." Ron said, "And now the whole school's going to think you're his great-great-great-great-great grandson or something-"

"But I'm not." Harry said, sounding like he was about to panic.

"You'll find that hard to prove." Hermione said. "He lived about a thousand years ago; for all we know, you could be."

I sighed. "It's not as bad as you think, Harry." I said. "I speak Parseltongue too."

Harry, Ron, and Hermione all turned to look at me. Ron and Hermione's mouths were dropped. "you can?" They all asked together.

I hesitated. "Well I think so at least. I mean, I understood what you were saying to the snake just a moment ago. And when the snake faced me, I told it to go away and that was when it turned to face Justin. I hadn't meant it to go towards another person, I just didn't want it near me."

Ron was gaping. I glared at him. Hermione sighed. "We can't worry about it right now."

I rolled my eyes and stood up. "I'm going back to the Hufflepuff common room. Night." I walked out the door and took the long way back to the common room. Inside, the Hufflepuffs were talking, mostly of them surrounding Justin. When I walked in, the voices hushed and they all stared at me. I knew a few of them had heard me speak Parseltongue. There had been people next to me when I'd told the snake to go away.

I didn't pay any of them attention and headed up to the Hufflepuff dorm room. What a bunch of bloody idiots I was stuck with! I was not looking forward to Herbology tomorrow. I climbed into bed and pulled the covers over me. It took a long time to fall asleep.

.💚💚.

𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝖓𝖊𝖝𝖙 𝖒𝖔𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌, however, there had been a blizzard and so our Herbology lesson was canceled. On that joyful note, I headed down to eat some breakfast. Cedric was sitting with some older students and the students my age all sat away from me so I sat down by myself in the middle of the table.

I didn't particularly care that they were avoiding me. My friends were the Gryffindors and they were the only friends that I needed. Yet. . .I couldn't forget the looks on Fred and George and Lee's faces. The utter shock. Suddenly, I found that I wasn't hungry. I was going to go to the forest today. I needed to talk to someone intelligent and someone that wasn't going to judge me. I wanted to learn from Firenze the results of my trial from weeks ago.

Knowing that I would get hungry later, I grabbed a couple of apples from the table and stood up, stuffing them in my bag. I left the Great Hall and made my way back to the common room. I was going to need my thick cloak, gloves, hat, and scarf.

In the dorm, I put some other things in my bag besides the apples. I included my sketchbook, journal, some glass jars, a pair of shears, a few muggle pencils I kept for only drawing, a couple of quills, and an ink pot. I left my dragon ring and bracelet from Fred in a drawer and locked it. I kept on my parents' necklace and also slipped on the necklace Lupin had gotten me last Christmas with the sapphire jewel. It reminded me of Firenze's eyes.

Then, pulling on my thick cloak, I stuffed the hat, gloves, and scarf into the bag to put on later. I flew down the stairs and ran smack dab into Cedric.

"Oh, hey, Cedric." I said breathless, bouncing back.

"Hey Elizabeth. I was wondering if I could talk to you real quick."

"Sure." I said, dread filling my veins.

"Can you tell me what happened at the dueling club?" Cedric asked, frowning.

"Draco Malfoy created a snake to attack Harry Potter. Lockhart tried to get rid of the snake but just made it angrier. It faced me, I told it to go away and it did, but it went towards Justin. It was going to attack Justin Finch-Fletchley. But Harry spoke Parseltongue and the snake backed down, becoming docile. Professor Snape got rid of the snake and Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, and I pulled Harry out of the room." I said speaking as quickly and as concisely as possible.

Cedric nodded. "Thank you. I figured the others were exaggerating."

"Let me guess, they said Harry and I were egging on the snake to attack Justin?" I asked angrily.

Cedric nodded. "I was also approached that I should take you off the Quidditch team."

I looked at him in shock and my heart thudded. What! My eyes immediately filled with tears. STUPID HORMONES! I quickly looked away.

Cedric quickly said, "I told them to piss off, I'm not taking off one of my best fliers!" He seemed anxious that I shouldn't cry.

I wiped the tears away quickly. "Sorry, knee-jerk reaction." I said in a quavering voice. "I love the Quidditch team."

Cedric then did something unexpected. He pulled me into a hug. I froze for a second and then hugged him back and then we pulled apart quickly. Cedric smiled. "I'll never kick you off, no matter what, promise."

I grinned. "Thanks Cedric."

"Call me Ced." Cedric said. "That's what all my friends call me."

I grinned broadly. I couldn't believe this was happening! "My friends call me Liz." I admitted, blushing.

Cedric laughed and then raised a hand. "See ya around Liz." He walked off, back up to the boys dorm. I stood there for a second, trying to figure out if perhaps I had died and gone to heaven. A heaven were Cedirc Diggory was okay with me calling him Ced and being his friend! I nearly squealed aloud and then remembered what I was supposed to be doing.

I went outside in much better spirits. I made my way into the Forbidden Forest, looking for pretty flowers to pluck and press into my journal. I found a new area that I had never seen before and spent an hour drawing it. It came out a little worse than the intended outcome but I was decently proud of it. I wish I had a camera like Colin so I could take pictures and draw later. Maybe I'd ask for that in the future for Christmas or my birthday. Were cameras expensive? I'd have to ask Colin after he was unpetrified.

I heard hooves on snow and looked up, expecting to see Firenze but instead, it was Bane. I quickly leapt to me feet, unsure of what I was supposed to do. Was he going to attack me? Tell me to get out of his forest? I shivered from cold and nerves. Then, strangely, he simply walked past me and continued on his way. I stood standing there for another moment and then sat back down. That was. . .strange? Unexpected?

I gathered my stuff and made my way to a field of flowers and found ones that I didn't have. I cut them cleanly so that they could grow back and then worked on pressing the flowers into my journal.

I laid my journal and sketchbook out on the snow, taking turns using them. Then, I heard the soft indents of hooves on snow and I looked up. This time, it really was Firenze.

"Hello Firenze." I said, pressing a lavender colored flower into my book.

"Hello Elizabeth Kane." He said as he usually did. He knelt in the snow next to me. "I see you're back to being your artistic self."

I smiled, carefully sticking the plastic across the flower. "I couldn't stay away, to be completely honest. I miss drawing the forest and collecting things."

Firenze was quiet for a long moment while I regrew the flowers I had cut from the stems. I made sure to use as little willpower as possible so that the flowers wouldn't rely on magic to grow from now on.

I broke the silence as I picked up a charcoal pencil to draw the flower field for the umpteenth time. But this time, it would be a winter scene. I wondered what the spell was to bring drawings and paintings to life. I'd have to ask Professor Flitwick.

"I saw Bane earlier." I whispered softly, not pausing from drawing the field to look at Firenze. "But he did not say anything to me."

Firenze was quiet a bit longer, looking thoughtfully out into the field. I had a hard time concentrating and wondered if perhaps I could draw him into the landscape. However, I had a fear that I wouldn't be able to capture his handsomeness correctly, so I didn't.

"Yes. We decided not to do anything particular. You're still welcome in our discussions and forest but we also have decided to keep our teachings to a minimum." Firenze finally said slowly, looking at my drawing.

I sighed, a bit disappointed, but said, "I respect that. I never wanted to know your deep secrets anyways. Only what you wanted to share and I was eager to learn."

Firenze nodded slowly, his handsome face thoughtful. I wondered if there was a phase where I found most boys and men handsome. If so, I was definitely going through it. Lucius Malfoy, Professor Snape, Professor Lockhart, Firenze, Fred, Oliver, Percy, Fred, Lee, Cedric. I was certainly in a boy phase. "Yes, I know that. But it is harder to make the more prejudiced of us see the difference between stealing and learning."

But then again, simply thinking that men and boys were handsome just meant that I was a girl who liked boys, right? It didn't mean that I was particularly infatuated with any of them. After all, it wasn't like when I saw Lucius Malfoy I desired to be with him, no. I simply thought he had good features.

I nodded, blushing like crazy. "That's how the Slytherins at Hogwarts feel about Muggles. They believe that the Muggle-born witches and wizards are trying to steal magic."

Firenze laughed, a wonderful hearty sound that lifted my soul listening to it. "Yes, I do believe it is something like that."

A few more moments of silence and then I asked, "I hope you don't find this question rude, but are you cold, sitting in the snow?"

Firenze's sapphire blue eyes pierced me, amusement dancing like blue fire in his eyes. "Of course not."

I blushed. "Right, just curious."

"I will never be offended by your questions Elizabeth Kane, as long as you don't mind mine." He said, still sounding amused.

I nodded. "Then I'll ask another. Do you make fires? I've always been curious because even in the winter, I've never seen you stand around a fire. Though I must admit, I'm not usually out in the winter. And," I glanced at his upper chest. "do you ever wear a garment, not necessarily clothes, but something to cover your chest in the winter? I mean, you have a human like torso, so wouldn't that get cold at some point?"

Firenze laughed again. I blew away a piece of broken charcoal on my drawing, cheeks burning red.

"Ah Elizabeth Kane, you do ask strange questions. We do make fires occasionally, usually at night in the winter. No, we never cover our 'torsos' with any type of garment, though we do occasionally get cold. But its in our DNA so we've built up a system against it."

I nodded, though my cheeks were still red.

There was more silence. The Firenze rose from his haunches. "I must get back to the tribe. You should leave soon. There will be a blizzard tonight and you don't want to get lost in here after dark."

I nodded. "I'll be done in a moment." I squinted through the glaring sun beaming off the snow, finishing the touches on the drawing. Firenze bent down over my shoulder and examined the drawing. "You have talent, Elizabeth Kane."

"Thank you." I said breathlessly. Just like Professor Snape, Firenze's opinions meant the world to me. I kept the page open to that so the charcoal wouldn't transfer onto the next one. I put the jars, journal, and writing utensils back into my bag. I had forgotten to eat and I quickly pulled out an apple. "Er- would it be rude to give you this? I want to thank you."

Firenze looked at the apple in amusement and took it. He laughed for a third time and then laid his gaze back on me and said, "Elizabeth Kane, you are an amusing person and a joy this afternoon. I will gladly accept this." I blushed, a weird thumping in my heart.

Okay. So maybe I didn't think of being with Lucius Malfoy or Lockhart. But the others- Fred, Ced, Oliver, Percy. . .even Professor Snape and Firenze. If I could've stolen a kiss from any of them, I would've.

Course, Bane might just kill me if I kissed a Centaur. Or Firenze would end up paying the price. I wondered how Snape would react to me kissing him. I daydreamed his reaction for a moment. His reactions varied greatly from him giving me detention, proclaiming his love for me, and also fainting. I tried not to laugh aloud.

Firenze trotted off, smiling, and I quickly gathered the rest of my stuff and headed out of the forest. It was getting close to four, judging by the sun which was low in the sky. It would be dark very soon. I would have Quidditch practice later tonight so I should go to the Great Hall for dinner. But I couldn't bring myself to.

I stopped by Hagrid's cabin on the way in. He looked distracted and I asked what was wrong. "My roosters have been killed an' there was 'nother attack up at ter school." He said, looking out the window.

"Another attack!" I exclaimed. What? I hadn't foreseen that! "Who was it? What happened?"

Hagrid grunted, shaking his head and setting a tea cup in front of me. "I was going ter see Professor Dumbledore 'cause o' the roosters dying and I ran inter Harry. He seemed a bit distracted. Anyway, the attack was on Justin Finch-Fletchley an' Nearly Headless Nick." Hagrid said grimly.

"Oh my. . ." I said and all amusing thoughts about boys and men and Professors and centaurs left my head almost immediately. "Nearly Headless Nick! But what can do that to a ghost?"

Hagrid shrugged, sipping his jug of tea. "Beats me. Professor McGonagall brought Harry up ter Dumbledore's office. Apparently some o' the students think Harry did it. Codswallop, Harry would ne'r do it." I nodded my head in agreement. "Dumbledore don' think it was Harry neither, which is good."

I nodded, not relieved. "I should go up to the castle Hagrid."

"Yeah, yeah. . ." Hagrid said, but I saw he seemed really upset so I didn't get up right away.

I fingered my cup and then asked, "Hagrid, what's really bothering you?"

Hagrid didn't answer me for a moment and then cleared his throat and said, "You 'ought to get up ter the castle Elizabeth. It's dangerous ter be out to late now."

I bit my lip but took the hint and made myself scarce. When I entered the Great Hall, I heard everyone talking about the attack in hushed whispers. I decided I'd go back to the Hufflepuff common room, but Cedric intercepted me outside the Great Hall where people were eating and talking in hushed whispers.

"Liz!" He exclaimed, "There you are. Professor Snape has been looking for your for hours, where have you been?"

I was distracted for a moment because even though it was a serious situation, he still remembered to call me Liz. "I was outside." I answered as honestly as I could. "I visited Hagrid." For about five minutes I tacked on without saying.

Cedric nodded hurriedly and said, "I don't know what he wants with you but he said it was important. He said he'd be waiting in Professor Dumbledore's office."

I started to walk and then I turned and said, "Ced, did something happen while I was out?"

Cedric nodded and then said, "Blimey, you wouldn't know. There's been a double attack. Justin from our house and also Nearly Headless Nick."

I dropped my mouth in mock surprise and said, "A ghost?"

Cedric nodded seriously. "We have to cancel practice tonight."

"What?! Why?" I asked, nearly on the left side of whining.

Cedric said downhearted, "The teachers are talking about upping curfew even earlier. We may have to start practicing early in the mornings instead."

I nodded. "I ought to go see Snape and Dumbledore and see what they want. Thanks for letting me know."

"No problem." Ced said, looking down. Justin was a part of our house after all. "See ya around."

I hurried off in the direction of Dumbledore's office, almost sprinting. My heart pounded with anticipation. I hadn't seen this and this had been a big moment. How had I missed this? Sure, I hadn't been looking, but usually the big moments just came to me.

I knocked on the door to Dumbledore's office, catching my breath.

"Come in." I heard tired words.

I opened the door and stepped into the room. Snape, McGonagall, and Dumbledore were waiting, all of them standing.

"Where were you?" Snape hissed angrily. "We've been looking everywhere for you."

I thought maybe my thick cloak, gloves, scarf, and snow-dusted boots might've been a dead give away to me having been outside, but I said nothing.

"Severus." Dumbledore said calmly, raising his hand. "Miss Kane, if you don't mind, where were you?"

There was no way in burning hell I was going to tell the headmaster that I had broken one of the schools top rules. So instead, I fibbed just a little. "I visited Hagrid and I also went out to draw." I blushed, embarrassed, and took out my sketchbook, nearly dropping it. I handed it to the Professor Dumbledore who took it.

His eyebrows raised for a moment and he handed it back. "You are quite talented Miss Kane."

"Thank you Professor." I said quietly, sliding the sketchbook back into my bag. "What did you want to see me about?"

"Have you heard about the double attack?" Professor Dumbledore asked, peering at me through his glasses.

I nodded, "Cedric Diggory filled me in on my way here though I had heard about it ten minutes earlier from Hagrid."

"Did you have any prior knowledge to this attack?" Dumbledore asked seriously.

I shook my head. "No, I had no idea. But then again, I wasn't watching. Usually, they come to me, the big moments like this at least, on their own. But I didn't get any notion that this would happen. My last image was that Professor Snape was going to kick Lockhart's. . . er- that Professor Snape was going to duel Lockhart at the dueling club." I blushed and flicked my eyes up to Professor Snape's for just a second. His lips curled into a smile. "I haven't seen anything else."

Professor Dumbledore nodded, "That will be all then."

"That's it?" Professor McGonagall asked. Dumbledore looked at her and I did too.

"That's it unless you have anything you'd like to tell us." Dumbledore said, speaking to her and myself at the same time. My eyes flicked over behind Dumbledore where a pile of ashes lay, a baby phoenix sitting there. I guess Fawkes had been reborn today.

I shifted uncomfortably where I was standing. There were multiple things I could tell Dumbledore about. The Polyjuice potion, the voices that Harry and I were hearing in the wall, etc.

Slowly I said, "Er- well I know for a fact that it wasn't Harry, but you seem to have figured that out. But um, there are some that believe that um. . ." I drifted off uncomfortably and then spit out, "Some think Draco Malfoy is the heir."

Snape made a sudden movement and I avoided looking at him.

"What do you think?" Dumbledore asked me, also ignoring Snape.

I hesitated and then said, "I don't believe it's him. The most obvious person is never the one."

"And why is he obvious?" Professor Snape hissed. It was the only time that he'd been hostile towards me, but it didn't faze me.

I looked at Dumbledore. "Well, he hates Muggle-borns. He also ummm, he said that he hopes a Muggle-born dies this time. . . umm preferably. . ." I hesitated. "Well, he hasn't said it yet, but I've had a vision of him telling Crabbe and Goyle that he hopes that Hermione Granger dies this time." My cheeks coloured.

Professor McGonagall gasped and seemed ready to say something but Dumbledore raised his hand and she pressed her lips together thinly.

"Thank you for telling me this Miss Kane." Professor Dumbledore said calmly.

"It isn't him, at least I'm 90% sure it isn't Malfoy and he hasn't said what I've just said yet, but I'm just telling you other people's suspicions." I said.

Snape was fuming. "If Professor Dumbledore believes Potter couldn't have done it as a second-year, then why would they believe that Malfoy could have done it- in the same grade as Potter."

I hesitated and then said, "Because of his father. Some believe that Malfoy's father opened the chamber when he was at school and passed the secret down to Draco. But the chamber was opened before Malfoy's fathers time so I knew that it couldn't be possible."

"Do you know who opened it last time?" Snape asked. "Was it really Hagrid?"

I started to get aggravated and anxious. Why the hell did I open my mouth? "No, it wasn't Hagrid. But I also don't know who it was. . . yet." My eyes glinted dangerously. "But once I figure it out, I'm going to clear Hagrid's name."

"Very well." Dumbledore said, but I could tell he was disappointed. "You may go."

I practically fled the room.

⬅️➡️

[regalmagic]

        breathe, she must tell herself otherwise her lungs might stop working altogether. her hands shook and so she clasped them togethered, but she could do nothing for her heart. emotions had always been felt strongly by the lockhart, but normally they were joyous ones that brought vibrant smiles and made brown hues come alive. now sorrow consumed them. she longed to reach out to him, take both his hands in hers and never let go, agree with all he said ---- but she was a lockhart.        ❝  no.  ❞        she made herself say, her gaze dropping so she might avoid the hurt she knew that single word would cause. perhaps if he'd come to her sooner, before his constant protests had earned her father's ire, then she could've. she'd tried. she'd told her father so many times that elliot was not his brother. his actions, however, had spoken louder than her pleas.        ❝  you know how it'll look. what people will think. maybe it doesn't matter to you but it does to me. i must think of my future.  ❞        a future that was supposed to be shared with him, but he'd chosen his path as she'd chosen hers.

the tenderness of touching her cheek was enough to make him undone, but as she leaned into it, his eyes softened - his features turned into that of a man bewitched and drunk in love with the woman in front of him. he barely grasped the words coming from her lips, he didn’t want to consider that there were people around. just one more minute, a few more seconds - he couldn’t let go just yet. until he did. “we can.” his voice strong, determination shining through as he saw the one he loved so dearly, the one he’d grown up knowing would be his wife, his other half. as his hand fell to his side once more, the feeling of a transparent life returned. “you cannot tell me you do not still feel my touch like an inferno in your veins, you cannot tell me that the shivers down your spine aren’t real when we stand close to one another.” he was desperate, searching, wanting. she just needed to give in and become his again and he would make sure of it. If she said yes, he would dive head first into the dangers of her father’s wrath. “become mine again, because if you tell me your heart does not long for us, you are lying, Victoria.” he pleaded, halfway begging for her to listen, yet he knew there was little hope, but hope he would carry always no matter his situation. 

[mslockhart]

The Good Fight 2x0? Promo

[hotchley]

🐨 Hello hello! I’m hanging out in my study hall right now. I’ve just started reading We Were Liars by E Lockhart since I’ve heard such good things. It’s beautiful writing so far. I can’t get over the fact that one of the characters is named Gat, though. Who the heck names their child Gat??

Also, I decided to run for captain of my forensics team! I did an application and I have to give a little speech today and then the coaches interview us and ahhhhh it’s terrifying. It’s a nice distraction from my black belt test on Saturday, I suppose. Karate has literally started haunting my dreams.

I got to play guitar and sing with the band at my church last night, and that was lovely! It’s been a while since I’ve gotten to play outside of my room. It’s always amazing to have a whole band, to be part of the whole and hear the music and know that you’re making that! I was using different equipment than I’m used to—I got to adjust my monitors myself and had a belt pack. I don’t wear a belt, so I had nothing to clip the pack to 😂 But it always feels so professional and cool, like I’m a rock star or something. Probably because the worship leader always calls me a rock star, haha.

Anyway! How’s life over in England? Sometimes I forget we live in different countries. Different continents, even! I feel like you’re someone I could just see in the halls of my school. Once you know an Internet friend (or sister) well enough, you forget that they kinda live on your phone screen most of the time. Not that that takes away from the friendship, or anything! In fact, I think that makes it more special, since it’s not just convenience. You have to actively choose the friendship. Thanks for choosing me :)

I’ve been keeping up with the poetry, and some songwriting! One of the songs that means the most to me reminds me a bit of you, and the conversations we’ve had about ambition and dreams and whatnot. Here’s the chorus:

I’ve been trying to find my voice

Seems like all my life

The only thing I’ve ever made is just noise

I’ve been hoping there’s another choice

Maybe it’s some crazy dream I gotta let go

But I’d kinda like it if someday, god forbid

My voice goes out

There’s an echo

This has ended up being rather long! But hopefully it distracted you from uni stuff for a little while. Waiting on things like that is the worst, cause there’s nothing you can do at this point but wait. That’s how I felt waiting for my ACT (nationwide test that can help you get into college) scores. But the test ended up going well, and I have a feeling things will turn out for you, too. You’d make an excellent lawyer (don’t they call them something different in the UK? Barristers?)—the world needs more people like you.

I am putting my answer below the cut (I love it when I do that, long asks are great, I feel very privileged receiving them)

Hi friend!

What is study hall? Is it the same as a free period??

We Were Liars is my go-to: I'm in a reading slump and need something short to get me out of it book, so I have read it many, many times, but I still couldn't tell you all of the parents. I also quite enjoyed it, even if people do think it's stupid.

There's a prequel coming out in May! I'm very excited- I also know what my Eid present from mum and sis is (because I literally asked for it) so I can get it the day it comes out :)

Yeah... that is a random name...

Oooh that's exciting! I hope you get it- and even if you don't, it'll be a good experience and at least you tried something that sounds absolutely terrifying!

Aww that sounds like a really pleasant experience. it's always nice getting to do things like that with other people- music is meant to be shared and be done with other people because the rush of happiness it gives you is amazing

Life over here is good(ish)! Still waiting for that one uni... but they've not got very long to get back to me anymore... first exam is in a month so it's basically final push to the end now, and practicing some of the techniques I got taught in counselling which is basically CBT. I feel like a right idiot doing them sometimes, but they do seem to be helping, so! I've almost finished redrafting my novel (again) and I'm so happy with the things that have changed which is <3

And Eid and my birthday are both next week! Which is also fun! I might be getting my coursework back, which is less fun, but that's not entirely certain so I'm just ignoring it

Aww, that's very sweet. Sometimes I forget that I don't see you everyday because this is one of those things where I know no matter how busy either of us may get, you'll find something to say and I'll come up with a response- no matter how long it takes me whoops. And I like that. And I love that you chose me- it really helps with the whole challenging thoughts thing :)

I'm glad the poetry is something you want to continue! I think I've written more in the past year than I have my entire life, and I also think a lot of that is down to me getting better (mentally) and also feeling like there's a reason to create. Something I've realised is: you don't lose the part of you that makes things when you get better. It just changes. The reason I'm not creating at the moment is because of A-Levels. It was never because I stopped hurting.

Song-writing sounds great! I could never! But I love that snippet, and I'm so honoured that some of our conversations have helped you write!

Ahh, I love getting long asks, and it's been very pleasant to answer this one :)

Yeah two things I've realised are one: things seem to have a funny way of working out just fine- a whole pandemic cancelled my exams and basically ruined my life for a long time because... well we all know what happened, but it also gave me some of the best people I've ever met and meant I did a lot of things like getting back into fanfic, finishing my novel, sharing my other writing!

And two: no matter how bad the things feel in the moment, that passes, things get better and the world carries on spinning. All the worst things that I ever thought would happen, happened, and I'm still here and I'm still alive and I'm still okay! So it's just deep breaths, controlling what you can and remembering that the people that matter won't ever be disappointed <3

Umm lawyers gets used to refer to the profession as a whole- we have solicitors and barristers, with the main difference being barristers go to all the courts. There are others, but this isn't a law lesson so it's not essential.

But thank you. I think I needed to hear that. Because I have no idea what area of law I want to go into, but I do know a part of me will never be happy if I don't even try and help people- whether that's through public defence, prosecution, law reform or human rights... it's also not the priority for now lol

I love you though. Thanks for this ask <3

[fandoomrants]

Okay, I'm glad for the second response! Also, I admire your on point examples as while I remember most things, it's been a while since I've read the books so there are some details I don't remember perfectly.

1. Yes, you actually have a point here, there are shop owners and musicians. I just meant, they make it seem as if there's not much to do in that world altogether. Like, think of how many work positions there are in the muggle world compared to the wizarding one. Sure, they don't need a big part of them but I just wish we had seen more people working different things. I know the series are from Harry's perspective so most people he sees are teachers or people form the Order and most work in the Ministry of Magic but still, even in Fantastic Beasts we meet only these people. There are many more professions, I believe.

2. Okay, yeah, that was a bad example but it was sorta connected to the other points and the teachers, especially DADA teachers. I'm pretty sure that everyone who attended Hogwarts during the time Harry did, learnt almost nothing from like, half of these teachers. Like, I mentioned in my og post, I'm a teacher. There's a structure, lesson plan, stuff that need to be covered, and they all seemed to be just... Doing stuff. Sure there were books and all but you can't tell me they learnt something from half of these people because we have so many examples of them not following these at all. Not to mention the cancelled exams when Harry was in second year. I like to believe the 5th and 7th year students still had their exams, seeing how this is something compared to A levels and stuff. So my point was, there were definitely things that weren't learned at school (even if they should be).

Thoo, now I actually have a following thought - it is said that Harry and Ron never went back for year 7, and I think the Weasley twins also didn't finish their education? So maybe years 6 and 7 were sort of for more advanced stuff. And maybe you can't become like, teacher or doctor if you don't.

3. Yeah, and I'm actually so glad they included that auror training because that would have been otherwise really weird.

I agree it's old fashioned, yeah. Not to mention that the majority of teachers are really old too. I think it was said wizards live longer than muggles? Wasn't Dumbledore 100+? I bet most teachers were over 70. So that now just creates an even bigger problem, in my head.. 😅😅

4. Oh, yeah, like, I don't dislike Dumbledore but I absolutely do not agree with a lot of things he did either. Like, there was reasoning behind most of these and that lots of the decisions he made weren't in favour of Hogwarts but as a whole for the Wizarding World (or so he believed) but still. I love Hagrid but even Harry decided to not continue his class. And Lockhart... I don't know what to say, actually. I understand about some of the others, he didn't have much of a choice when it came to Umbridge, he didn't really know Quirell, he wanted to give Hagrid a chance. Same can be said for Remus too, tho I think choosing a werewolf, even if he was in fact the most competent, was also alarming. But Lockhart... Ugh.

Not to mention, he was literally putting these DADA teachers in risk because chances something happened to them was big.

I somewhat think that it was better the school where they actually teach them to use their powers was more important than the Ministry, tho.

5. Okay, here I had to elaborate a bit. I think a teacher should be good in what they're doing and want to do it, too. Yes, it's important they want to teach but it's also important that they're actually competent to do so. Both in being able to handle children, and having a good approach towards the subject. I have many coworkers that really love children but I still wouldn't say they're the best when it comes to teaching them the things they have to just because they lack certain... Skills. And let's take for example Hagrid again, so it'll be more understandable. He liked his position but he definitely wasn't a good teacher.

I don't want to defend Snape, in fact, I think that lots of the students would have had fared better in Potions if he wasn't acting the way he was but I think it was mostly just making them not want to put much effort. I believe Hermione had good gades in Potions despite Snape being a jerk to her too. I agree that he maybe didn't teach them theories and all but I believe that Hermione was good in potions before year 6 because the recipes Snape gave for Potions were the ones he had changed like in his old book, not the ones they had to actually use. So, I think he was teaching them the right things but he really wasn't putting more than the needed effort in it, and his lack of desire was reflecting on them. When it comes to Harry, I think it was a kind of biased point of view here, born from his hatred for Snape and therefore lack of interest in the subject. Snape was incredibly bad when it came to handling children. So, yeah, he wasn't a good teacher as in total lack of social skills, but he was competent and they had some chance of learning something there (compared to some of the other teachers, that is).

I can honestly make a whole post only about the teaching, tho.

6. Yeah, that was basically my point here. There must have been many teachers and they, for one reason or another, ended their career after one year. So I can sort of see how there wasn't much of a choice left than hire anyone who applied but also if I have learned one thing is, if there's a constant need for employees somewhere or for some position in the case, there must be a good reason so DON'T APPLY. 😅😅

Also, I really want to add, I hope that I don't sound like someone who only tries to argue. I answered the previous one while at work so I was in a bit of a rush but I make these posts with the idea of someone eventually engaging in them and answering. So, thank you for discussing these.

No but I have so many questions about the wizarding world which always come to my mind whenever I think of HP. And every new question just branches into a couple of others.

Granted, some are answered and some are so largely fanoned that most people already believed it to be canon but still.

First of all, what do all these people do, like... I feel like you have a few options only. You can become an auror or work in the Ministry of Magic in general (but tell me, how many unoccupied positions there are?!), you can work in St. Mungo's or something, or you can be a teacher and basically... This is it. Yeah, we have people like Newt but I feel like not many are into these things and also, it's pretty dangerous, isn't it?

And another thing. Like, how do they learn some of the spells that are not studied at school? Okay, let's say pure bloods have someone to teach the but muggle born? Others? How do you know how to make a car fly or sth?

How there isn't some type of Wizard University?! Where one can actually specialise in a certain field, let's say medicine?

Also, can likee, everyone become a teacher? Because I feel like that's really the case... (Ok, I'm in fact a teacher and for a fact I can say where I work it's sorta like that too but it's not your typical school and these are schools that everyone from the country/region attends..)

Like, no degree, no nothing. Do they just check how good was the person at this certain subject or what? How dangerous they are? And people seeing how each time there's a new DADA teacher, lots of them dying or something, why do they keep applying?! Even if you don't know about the curse, why?

Honestly, I have so many questions about Hogwarts and wizarding schools in general that it can be a post on its own.

[angry-fishy8]

A story that'll never be published

I remember that night. We talked till the sun came up and you kissed me. Not like I was wanting or the kind you were hoping, but I think that's when we finally learned that there was something. I don't think I wanted to admit it, and neither did you,  so we kind of just forgot about that night. I mean why would we? I was plain and you were Mr. Fourteen. I gave up on closing myself because you told me to open up. God, looking at it, we were so stupid. But I'm not saying that being angry. I'm saying that with a huge smile on my face." +

I don't remember when I fell asleep but I woke up around three. Tyler still wasn't there so it made me worried. Are you really that mad at me? I just wanted to sleep but my brain wouldn't shut off. +

I grabbed one of Tyler's hoodies and grabbed a blanket. I didn't have an exact place where I wanted to go, but I didn't want to be in the hotel right now. I know I could've just went to talk to Brooklynn, but she'd just tell me off. +

When I had gone outside, the crisp fall air hit my legs before anywhere else. I guess shorts were a mistake. +

While I was walking I was replaying everything that happened today. Why would Tyler be so mad just because he pushed me away? I mean I guess in hind sight what I said after didn't really help. +

"I promised I wouldn't hurt you and that wasn't enough!" +

"It was!" I yelled. +

"Are you sure? Because everyone thinks that I'm the one trying." +

"What am I supposed to do, I told you I didn't want to ruin our friendship! Here we are! And here you are getting ready to leave." I grab his coat and threw it at him. "Do it, like everyone else." +

"Kate, this is just you worrying." he said calmingly. +

"GO! I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!" +

"Is that what you really want?" +

"You're gonna do it anyways! Might as well let me do it on my terms." I cried. "Because that's what you want right? To leave? It's obvious, you've wanted that for a while." I looked away while he stepped closer. "Leave." +

He stood there for a moment. +

"I really did love you." +

I could feel everything crumble. After a while of not responding, he left. And everything I had to offer did too. +

I sat down at the park where Mrs. K and us talked. I just sat staring at the stars waiting for something to happen. +

"Kate, sweetie, it's time for school." I heard my mom sit on the opposite side of my bed. "You've been here all weekend." +

I didn't pull the covers from my head but I'd been awake the entire night. +

"Bumblebee." I whispered. +

"Are you sure?" She put her hand on my leg rubbing it. "It's the last one for the semester." +

"Yes please." +

"I'll call the school and tell them you've been sick all weekend. You have your concert tonight though." She kissed my head. "Don't let this bring you down." +

Brooklynn: You left me alone all weekend and now? +

Kate: We broke up. +

She didn't reply. And I stayed awake just watching my wall. That was enough. +

There was a shooting star and that's what pulled me from my thoughts. I laughed. +

Story continues below

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"You weren't even that special." I whispered. +

"There'll be a day you can say you're okay and mean it." I sang. Secret for the mad by Dodie was the one thing that helped me when I was down. +

"I promise you, it'll all make sense again." +

"That's the song you want to sing for Senior Night?" Mrs. K asked. +

"Why not?" I laughed. +

"It just doesn't seem like you, I mean it fits your vocal tone beautifully, and the vibrato in your voice is lovely with it." +

"But?" +

"Sweetie." She patted my arm, "We can talk if you want." +

"I know." I fake smiled. "I think when I'm fully ready, you'll be the first person I'll talk to you. I promise." +

"Alright then, I'll remember that." she smiled. "How's college searching?" +

"I found a great culinary arts school." +

"Culinary Arts? Like your father?" +

"Through everything he put me through, our best memories are cooking." I played with my ring finger. "It's all I know." +

"And music sweetie." +

"Yeah, but I'll never be good enough for that," +

"I thought the same thing once. And here I am" +

I smiled. That was the best memory between us. I mean there are a million great memories, but the one on one moments are the best. +

"Kate?" I heard Tyler say. +

I covered up in the blanket more as he sat by me. +

"What are you doing here?" +

"I couldn't sleep." I said looking up at the stars. "Never seems to shut off when I want it to." +

"Same." He whispered. +

"I think I owe you an apology." +

"For?" +

"I'm not sure." +

"Then don't" he said sweetly. "Don't do that to yourself. If you said sorry for every time I did something wrong, then you'll never trust me." +

"But what did you do?" +

"What did you do?" +

"I let you leave and didn't talk it out with you." +

He laughed. "I didn't want you to feel obligated to. If you need space that's what I'm more than happy to give you." +

"Wait." +

"Yes that's why I left." he wrapped his hands around his legs. "What were you thinking about that couldn't make you sleep." +

I laughed. "Seeing Mrs. K today and talking about my fidget just made some unhappy memories pop up." +

"Like Alec?" +

"Yeah." He didn't respond so I pushed myself. "Is there anything you really want to know about my past?" +

He looked up at me but I didn't turn towards him. +

"Uhm no not really." +

"Come on, I won't lie." +

"Okay. Why do you play with your ring finger?" +

"Ahh the basics." I laughed, "I caught it when I first met Alec. He used to comment on how I would be a "beautiful bride". It was basically his way of trying to have me open up. Our friends would call him future husband and after a while we'd laugh about it. The first time he'd ever held my hand, he grabbed my hand and played with my ring finger." I started to rub it. "For Christmas, he bought me a little ring to put on it so I had something to play with. It was the first time he'd shown that he liked me. I always thought it was a game with him." +

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"So you didn't trust him when you first met him?" +

"No," I looked at the stars, "I didn't really like trusting guys." +

"Why?" +

"My dad." I grinned, "How cliché? The one guy who should give me unconditional love and make me think I'm really beautiful, actually made me think the opposite." +

"Did he ever-" +

"No, all emotional trauma. If I wore something tight fitting, he'd call me too fat. If I wore makeup it was too much. If I was asked out, he'd ask who'd ask me out. After a while I started to wear long sleeved shirts and pants every day. Even in the summer. Then my sophomore year, I didn't eat, and he'd tell me off. Asking why am I taking the easy way out. How is starving yourself to a certain image the easy way out? I had started to get so bad, I fainted in certain times. Basically anything he saw wrong with me, I saw wrong with myself times ten." +

"Oh." Was his only response. +

"Next question?" +

"Uhm, do you ever think you could fall in love again?" +

My heart stopped. "Sometimes I wonder that myself. But then I ask am I really capable of it?" +

"What do you mean?" +

"Like, I love seeing people in love. It's beautiful. Not just the honeymoon stage, but when you see a couple and know, yeah they fight, but they choose to give each other space, to think about if the fight was important or not. Then they pretend it didn't happen or they move passed it. It makes them stronger. It's like the strongest friendship, but more. I see that and I think, am I capable of that?" +

"And?" +

"I mean that's what we did." I didn't look at him but I saw from the corner of my eye that his mouth slightly opened. "I'm not saying I'm in love with you, but I'm also not saying I wouldn't be able to." +

"With me?" +

"With anyone." His jaw clenched. "The idea of opening up to someone scares me." I continued. "Think of it, if the men who are supposed to love you, support you, treat you with respect and dignity, if they chose to do the opposite, could you learn to love or even fathom the idea of it?" +

"I have." It was his turn. "My mom, we have a strange relationship, it's nothing like you and your dad, but it's close. She blamed me for my sister getting sick, when we first found out, and when I wanted to come and listen to what the doctors had to say, she'd just tell me no. She'd blame me for it." +

"I'm so sorry.." +

"Well after awhile I gave up on our relationship, how can you blame someone who had no iea what was going on?" +

"You can't." +

"But she did." his voice broke. "I think that's why I have such a strange relationship with girls, "Jennifers and Carries" they make it easy. Because I can shut it down. I can just refuse to get close to them, and they'll take a hint. Other than my sister, I've never had a strong connection with woman." +

"So you're scared." I said silently. "Of being hurt again. Of trying to jump and not knowing if that person is going to catch you or just leave." +

We didn't say anything for a while. But I took his hand. It wasn't in the romantic sense. I wanted him to know I'm willing to catch him if he was willing to do the same. Neither of us knew how to connect with someone of the opposite sex, and just grabbing his hand, it was the first step. +

"Together," I started. "I want us to take baby steps together." +

"In a romantic way?" +

I laughed, "No bozo, in a platonic way. Neither you nor I have any real sense on trust. you preach to me about dating but you've yet to notice we're in the same boat." I nudged him. "So why not take the same ride and see where we go." +

"As friends?" +

"As friends." +

"And if one day, one of us decides we want something more?" he squeezed my hand but he couldn't tell he was squeezing my heart too. +

"Then the other one has to be just as ready." I looked at him. "Deal?" +

"Is this your idea of asking me out in the future?" +

"No." I smiled noticing he was leaning in closer. "Because neither of us know if this'll work." +

"I have a pretty good idea that it will." He said inches from my face. Just before I could pull away he kissed me on the forehead. "When you're ready." He whispered. +

We sat there for a moment looking at each other and for a moment I could feel every negative thought drift away. He smiled and it made me smile just as wide. +

"There you are!" I heard a female voice squeal and I jumped away from him. "Tyler you forgot your key in my car." +

"Oh uhm thanks Lacey." He coughed. +

"Who's this?" we asked in unison. +

"Oh Lacey this is Kate the friend I told you about, Kate this is Lacey, I met her in a bar on my walk." +

And all the bad thoughts were back but they weren't about me. No they were about Lacey and Tyler. He looked at me and under the blankets squeezed my hand. +

"Pleasure meeting you Lacey." I smile letting go of Tyler's hand and getting up, "I guess you two should continue getting to know each other." +

"Are you his girlfriend?" The young blonde asked. +

"No." Tyler said before I could, "We're just friends." +

"Then why is she wearing a hoodie with your last name?" She pointed her hand at me. +

"Believe it or not friends share clothes." I laugh taking it off and handing it to her. "Believe me when I say, if he remembered your name after a while, you've got no threat from me. I'm just a friend." I strained. "Anyways, I need to pack, I've gotta get back to Pueblo tomorrow." +

Tyler stood up and grabbed my hand, "But we weren't supposed to go back till Monday." +

"Silly me, I forgot I put in a three day weekend." I smiled. "Again it was nice meeting you Lacey, you're in great hands with him." +

And I walked back to the hotel without my blanket, his hoodie, or a clear mind. +

"Stupid." I whispered to myself