#maybe i'll write something on these pairings now

[cassiesc0rner]

Impurities VII

Synopsis: You're the new girl at East Highland High, your only goal is to get through school. Until you come across Nate Jacobs

Genre: smut, slight fluff, slight angst

Pairing: Nate x fem!reader

Warnings: manipulation, jealousy, consumption of alcohol,

(semi) drunk sex, p in v, choking, begging, edging, sexual frustration, multiple orgasm, Nate considering non-con impregnation, lmk if I missed anything!

Song rec: Slut me out - NLE Choppa | Get it sexyy - Sexyy Red | Gimme more - Britney Spears | Haunted - Beyonce

WC: +9,8k

Other parts: previous part, next part

A/N: Shout out to Montell Fish’s music for once again helping me write smut, and shout out again to 💿 anon <3. Guess what, I still can’t add links to my posts but you can still find my previous posts on my pinned post. :3

Needless to say, Nate succeeded in getting you drunk, and you clearly had the time of your life.

He was on his way to get you a new drink, when some girls from the cheer squad decided to talk to him. And once he got your drink and returned, you weren't sitting on the couch anymore.

Fuck.

He cursed under his breath, well aware that nothing awful could've happened to you in the span of two minutes. But the thought of you not being under his watch right now, made him feel uneasy.

Nate walked through the crowd, and due to him being taller than most of the guests he could look around with ease. Once he spotted you in one of the corners of the living room he took a deep breath.

It surprised him at first, when he caught you talking to a student you've never even dared to look at— Rachel, the school's top cheerleader and one of the    popular girls.

He wasn't sure how to feel about it.

Sure, he thought it was cute that you socialized way easier, and it was nice that you were hanging out with people he actually knew, but he didn't get you drunk just so you’d leave him to talk to other girls.

He got you drunk because he wanted to have you all to himself, and to have even more power over you than he already had.

Once Nate had seen enough of you and Rachel talking, he decided to join you two. He was tipsy as well, not drunk however since he had to keep his head clear in order to watch out for you.

Which he felt like didn't really work, since he had lost you for a moment.

After he reached the two of you, he slung his arm around your waist, startling you a little since you were so focused on talking to Rachel.

He locked eyes with you, as he stared you down. "Having fun?" his tone was laced with an undertone only Rachel and her friends seemed to pick up on.

"Yeah.. Rachel's really cool," you slurred, as you smiled up at him, to which he simply nodded "did you know–" Nate cut you off, not even paying attention to Rachel "Why don't you come with me for a sec?"

Rachel glanced between the two of you, as she stayed quiet. You sighed and rolled your eyes– something you didn't do a lot around Nate, but it annoyed him nonetheless.

"It was nice meeting you, I'll be back soon." you assured her, still smiling as you wandered off to the hallway with your boyfriend.

Once you two entered the dimly lit hallway, he sighed as he shoved you just slightly, before removing his grip from your arm "What were you doing?" he asked as he leaned down, eyeing you intensely.

You chuckled in confusion "Huh..? What do you mean?" you asked, still too far gone to realize he was being serious "I was just talking to Rachel, you never told me she's so nice. I wouldn't have been so scared of this whole party if I knew everyone's so chill."

Nate placed his hands on your waist as you smiled, blinking up at him. But despite loving it when you admired him, Nate's tone remained stern. "I don't like it when you wander off like that," he said, his eyes boring into yours "especially when you're drunk."

You giggled softly "I'm not drunk, Nate.. maybe a little tipsy. But I was just having fun, isn't that what parties are for?" you pouted. Nate sighs, before putting on a small smile "Yeah of course, but.. I'm just looking out for you. I was confused when you weren't sitting there anymore." he explained.

The alcohol in your system made everything feel way lighter and less serious, resulting in you also not taking Nate serious. "Nate, relax," You laughed, playfully patting his solid chest "I was just having fun it's not that serious." you brushed him off, unaware of the way his jaw clenched as he stared you down.

He clearly didn't find the situation 'funny' or 'not that serious’.

"Not that serious?" he repeated, his grip tightening slightly. "C'mon Nate, I was just talking to her, no need to get so possessive." You didn't realize how your lighthearted comments angered him more and more.

He closed his eyes, and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm down. You just smiled at him as your hand wandered from his chest to his cheek, which caused Nate to flinch just slightly "You're cute when you're jealous." you teased.

You stood on your tip toes, and pressed a kiss onto his other cheek "But seriously, I'm not going anywhere so relax a little." you added.

Nate was conflicted: on one side he loved how you tried to reassure him, but he was also angry, because you were too drunk to understand how serious this was for him.

Even though it was his fault you were drunk in the first place.

Suddenly, one of your favourite songs started blasting through the speakers, causing your eyes to widen as you looked at Nate. "We should totally dance I love that song!"

You quickly took his hand, almost dragging him after you, as you made your way back to the living room. Once you started dancing, Nate made sure to stay as close to you as physically possible.

He didn't really dance, he preferred watching you as you closed your eyes and got lost in the music. Your moves were slightly uncoordinated, but Nate still thought you looked incredibly sexy.

Your laughter filled the room as you continued to sway to the song. Nate’s hands were placed on your hips as he looked around from time to time, checking if anyone dared to look your way.

He definitely didn’t miss the way some guys looked at you, even if it was just for a split second. He couldn’t blame them of course, not when you looked so pretty, your energy seemed to captivate everyone else.

At some point you smiled up at him, oblivious to the darkness in his eyes “Come on, Nate!” you whined loudly, over the blasting music “Loosen up a little.”

“I am loose.” he grumbled, but the way his fingers dug into your skin told a different story. You playfully swung your arms around his neck, to pull him closer. “This is your party, you should enjoy it.” you pouted, as you thought back to all the things you did to make this day special.

“I am enjoying it, I enjoy watching you.” He reassured you, as he pulled you against him. You leaned back against his arms as you smirked up at him. “Really?” you asked, as your eyes wandered down to his lips. “I enjoy watching you, too..” you admitted.

Before Nate had the chance to respond, someone bumped into you, completely throwing you out of the moment. Nate shot a glare at the person, ready to snap at the guy, but you quickly reached up to cup his cheek, in an attempt to redirect his attention back to you.

“Hey, it’s okay,” You whispered, your thumb brushing over his warm cheek “I’m sure he didn’t do it on purpose..” He took a deep breath, nodding as his gaze slowly shifted back to you.

He was holding himself back so well in front of you, and you didn’t even notice it. You tried to pull him back into the moment, continuing to dance, but Nate had other plans. “I think you’re done dancing. Let’s get some more drinks.”

It sounded like a suggestion, like you had a choice, but Nate already dragged you back into the kitchen. He didn’t plan on staying much longer since he felt like a ticking time bomb, ready to explode if anyone else would piss him off in the slightest.

When you two reached the kitchen, Nate instantly retrieved two new cups from the counter as you leaned against it, your head leaned back as you closed your eyes.

He looked at you, wanting nothing more than to carry you to his car right away and take you home. But he controlled himself once again, despite his patience being almost non-existent.

He mixed you another drink, making sure to mask the amount of vodka with the juice you liked so much. Then he mixed himself another drink as well, before handing you your cup.

When he grabbed his own cup, he saw you what drinking large sips of your cup. “I love this juice soo much..” you mumbled before finishing your cup, causing Nate to look at you in awe. “Can I have one more?” you chuckled.

Nate nodded, taking a sip of his own drink before placing it back on the counter and mixing you a new one. He tried to hide his smirk as he handed you the cup again.

And just like before you took a few large sips, not emptying the cup this time. After Nate emptied his cup, you two started chatting about some of the guests, and it really only took you a few minutes before you closed your eyes and sighed.

“Jesus.. I feel funny.” you exhaled, feeling the room spin even more than before. You felt so light but so heavy at the same time. Nate frowned as you breathed heavily. “Are you alright?” he asked, as he placed a hand on your cheek.

You nodded before smiling again. “Everything’s fine..” you said, your speech even more slurred than before. “We should probably go home.” Nate offered, hoping you’d agree, but you just whined. “No, no, no… ‘s fine ‘m just… I jus’ need a moment.. Fuck.” you laughed.

Nate sighed, before he noticed someone entering the kitchen. It was Max, and he looked more than concerned when he noticed your current state: Your hair slightly disheveled, your body slumped against the counter and your eyes closed.

You were too far gone to even notice him coming in, despite the door being opened, causing the music to be louder for a moment. It surprised him that you were this drunk, since Nate was around you the entire night.

He probably knew you never got drunk in your life, so why wasn’t he paying more attention? “Woah, Y/n are you okay?” he asked, as he approached you two. You slowly opened your eyes blinking slowly “Max?” You asked as you tilted your head slightly.

He nodded, but before he could say something Nate stepped in “She’s fine, she just drank a bit too much.” Nate responded casually. “I think we’re gonna head home now.” He continued.

Max intervened, “I think you should drink some water first, and see if you need anything else.” Max was well aware that Nate wasn’t pleased with him being worried for his girlfriend, but with your current state he couldn’t really pay attention to what Nate wants.

He quickly prepared you a cup with water, handing it to you “Here you go.” he said, his voice gentle. Max also drank of course, but he never went overboard with it. Especially now since it was his place, he had to take care of the other guests.

“Thanks, Maxie.” you giggled before taking the cup and sipping from it, some of the water running down your chin since your moves were still uncoordinated.

Nate shot you a dangerous look, more than glad that you were about to leave soon.

‘Thanks, Maxie.’

‘Maxie’

He wanted to bash Max’s head in, and he didn’t even do anything. “Do you need anything else? Maybe something to eat? I think there’s still some pizza left from earlier–” Nate quickly interjected “She’s fine, don’t worry..” he said harshly “I’ve got it under control.”

Max ignored Nate’s glare and kept his focus on you. “Are you sure you’re okay, Y/n?” he asked softly, his brows furrowed. “If you’re not feeling well, you shouldn’t be moving around too much.”

You nodded lazily but Nate was done “I told you, she’s fine!” he snapped “We’re just gonna leave, she needs to calm down somewhere quiet, right baby?”

You nodded slowly, as if you needed to process every word. Max nodded too, knowing he won’t be able to convince him. “I can call you guys a cab if you want to.” he offered, but Nate immediately shook his head.

“That’s not necessary, I’ll drive us home.” he declared, his tone dangerous. Max swallowed harshly, unable to believe he’d put you in danger like this. He knew that Nate smoked and drank earlier, so why was he doing this?

Sure, he knew that Nate was reckless and drive even when he drank. But with you in the passenger seat?

He glanced back at you, still worried but also well aware that if he pushed any further, he’d have Nate’s fist printed onto his face. Your hand gripped Nate’s forearm for balance as you looked at Max “I’ll be fine, don’t worry..” you said as you smiled lazily at him.

“Thank you for everything, and the.. the water.” You said as you stumbled past him. “Sure, no problem. Get home safe.” he said before watching you two exit the kitchen.

Once you two were back in the living room, Nate leaned down before sternly saying “We’re leaving. And you’re not gonna talk to him again, you understand?”

You clearly didn't process the possessive edge to his voice, and you were too tired to argue with him, so you just nodded "Yes, sir." you giggled, as you leaned against him.

Nate’s grip on you tightened as he sighed in relief “Good girl.”

When you two left Max's house, the cool air hit you like a truck, which was a good think because you seemed to come to your senses again. Nate led you to his car, roughly opening the passenger door before helping you sit down.

You leaned back, breathing evenly as you waited for Nate to get in, completely forgetting to buckle up. Once he was inside, he shot you a glare "buckle up." he ordered, his voice so low that it took you a moment to process what he said.

You nervously fumbled with the seatbelt, and after a moment of struggling, Nate leaned over, his faces inches away from yours as he snapped it into place. You couldn't help but admire his face, the way his long lashes made him look so innocent from your current position.

"There, all set." he mumbled before pulling out of the driveway and onto the street. The world outside was blurry, the streetlights flashing by as Nate drove much faster than was safe.

But it excited you in a way.

Your head snapped towards him as he started speaking. "Do you have any idea how crazy it drives me, seeing other guys talk to you like that?" He admited, his jaw clenched.

He wanted to yell his frustration out, show you how angry he was at Max for not minding his own business, and at you for just letting him intervene. But he couldn't explode in front of you, not now, not when he still had plans for the night.

You shook your head in response. "I meant it earlier, when I said that you're mine. You're my everything, and it pisses me off, when people like Max make me feel like you're not.."

He clenched his jaw as he gripped the steering wheel. "I want to beat the shit out of him whenever he just fucking looks at you." He continued, before you interrupted him "Nate.. you're driving so fast.." you pointed out, which caused Nate to scoff "Are you scared?"

You slowly shook your head, not sure if you were telling the truth and neither was Nate, so he stepped on the gas pedal, causing you to gasp.

Nate however was having the time of his life, smiling as he raced through the streets. "Nate, s-slow down.." you pleaded.

"That's the first time I've ever heard you say that.." he teased, causing you to hide your face behind your hands. "Aw, Y/n come on," Nate cooed "I just wanna get you home fast." he added, as he slowed down a little bit.

You sighed in relief, before you nodded. His hand made its way to your cold thigh, squeezing it as his eyes were glued to the road.

He tried to ignore it, but he had problems focusing. Not only because you were next to him and he was impatient, but also because of the alcohol in his system.

Every once in a while when he'd mix you a new drink, he'd also pour himself a cup. Sure, he was nowhere near as drunk as you were, but he was definitely tipsy.

And the way you looked at him didn't make it any easier for him. When the car came to a stop at a red light, he glared at you, as his grip on the steering wheel tightened "Keep looking at me like that, and we won't make it home."

You blinked at him, before furrowing your brows in confusion—which was so cute it made him want you even more. "Why?" You asked as your tilted your head in confusion.

Nate let out a low chuckle at your innocent question. "Why?" He echoed, as he smiled "Because I'll pull over right now and take you in my car, even if we're not far away from home." he promised, his hand wandering higher up your thigh.

Your breath hitched as you looked at him once more "Noo.. 's not comfortable in a car." You pouted, despite involuntarily spreading your thighs apart for his hand.

Nate chuckled once he noticed, slowly retrieving his hand in a testing way. "Good thing we're almost there." he murmured, retrieving his hand teasingly slow as he watched your reaction. 

Once the traffic lights turned green again, Nate wasted no time, stepping on the gas pedal to make a sharp turn into his street. The car roared forward, tires screeching as he pulled into his driveway at an insane speed.

Before you could fully process it the engine turned off, leaving you both in deafening silence. Nate quickly turned towards you to unbuckle you.

Just as your hand reached for the door handle, his fingers wrapped around your arm—tight, almost bruising. He yanked you back toward him, his eyes burning into yours, and the intensity of his gaze both feared and excited to you.

The silence between you was heavy, you could hear nothing but the pounding of your own heart, each beat echoing in your ears.

But then, just as quickly as the storm in his eyes had flared, it disappeared. Nate exhaled slowly, his grip loosening before he let go entirely. He shoved his door open and stepped out, slamming it shut behind him with enough force to make the car shudder.

You sat there, stunned, your arm tingling where his fingers had been. What just happened? You barely had a moment to catch your breath before your door was ripped open.

Nate stood there, his eyes dark and unreadable. Without a word, he reached down, hands firm but careful this time, and lifted you effortlessly out of the car.

You gasped as he lifted you up and hoisted you over his shoulder like you weighed nothing, your legs dangling in front of his chest. "N-Nate–" you yelped, as you tried to hold onto anything.

Nate just chuckled darkly before lightly slapping your thigh just enough to make you gasp. "What?" he asked obliviously, as he took several steps toward his front door.

They way he was able to simply swing you over his shoulder, with no effort whatsoever sent a wave of heat through you. "Let me down.." you said, but your voice was more breathless than demanding.

"I will, don't worry." he assured you, and despite not being able to see his face, you could hear the smirk in his voice.

He reached his front door, unlocking it with one hand before finally entering. You still whined, the position you were in and the motion of him walking making you dizzy "Nate..." You complained, but Nate was quick to shut you up with a harsh slap on your butt.

You gasped, involuntarily rubbing your thighs together—which of course didn't go unnoticed by Nate. "Hey.. what was that for?" You pouted as your cheeks heated up.

"For whining so damn much." he retorted before finally lifting you off his shoulder and onto the ground. Once you stood in front of him, in the dark hallway, he glanced down at you with the same intensity he had in the car. He was quick to kick his shoes off, waiting for you to do the same, but you only stared at him with that look.

You just opened your mouth to talk, when Nate grabbed your face and leaned down to kiss you. The kiss was messy due to you being drunk, and caught off guard, but Nate didn't care. He pushed both of you against the nearest wall, a small thud following as you knocked something over on the small cabinet that stood there.

But Nate didn't really pay it any mind, too hellbent on feeling you, to care. His lips were back on you in a split second, his teeth grazing your bottom lip before tugging it gently.

You whimpered into his mouth when his hands roughly bunched your dress up, his movements becoming more desperate and urgent. He was just about to bunch it up far enough to catch a glimpse of your panties when—

click

Both of you froze, as you looked at the source of the sound, the hallway suddenly way brighter than before.

Standing just a few feet away was Nate's mom, looking both tired and surprised as she took in the scene in front of her: You pinned against the wall, hair disheveled and by the look of your face, definitively not sober.

Nate quickly let go of you before he ran a hand through his hair. You stumbled slightly at the loss of stability, but Nate was quick to steady you again. "Jesus, Nate," She sighed, somehow still relieved that it was just you two and not an intruder.

The tone of her voice seemed to wake you up from the state you were in. You scrambled to push your dress down again

"I-I.. Um.. we're so sorry." you nervously rambled, "Mom," Nate interrupted, his tone stern as he slowly looked towards her. "why are you up?"

Great, just what he needed.

Of course he wasn't embarrassed, he couldn't care less about his mom seeing you two like this. But he was mad at himself, for not taking you upstairs right away.

His mom scoffed "I woke up because of the noise. I thought someone broke into our house, Nate." You looked to the ground, you were so ashamed that you started to sober up a little bit.

"Sorry, didn't think we'd wake you up." He replied, almost too nonchalant. "Of course you didn't." She muttered, as she narrowed her eyes at him before glancing at you "Y/n, honey, are you okay? You look like you've had a little too much.."

You nodded slowly, trying to stammer out a response, but Nate was quick to speak for you "She's fine, I was just about to get her to bed." His mom nodded, but her face gave away that she didn't believe it. "Yeah, sure."

Nate rolled his eyes, before pulling you away from the wall "Good night, mom." he said, before walking you towards the stairs "Good Night, Marsha." you called out, before walking upstairs with Nate.

Once you two made your way into Nate's room, he was quick to close the door behind him. "Fucking finally.." He groaned, as he quickly locked his door. Then he turned towards you, taking in the sight of your flushed face.

He approached you with deliberate steps, and that alone got you more excited of what was to come. Without saying another word he closed the distance between you two, as his lips found yours in a heated kiss.

You whined in response, which enabled him to finally lead you over to his bed. He kissed you one last time, before pushing you onto his bed, your heel clad feet still outside.

He slowly went down on his knees, something you didn't expect to ever happen. His gaze was fixated on your feet as his hands slowly removed one of your heels "You know that I'd do anything for you, right?" he asked, his tone calmer than before.

You nodded, as you kept your gaze locked on his hands "And you know that I'm never gonna let anyone come between us, right?" you nodded again, slightly confused.

Nate placed one shoe onto the floor, before tending towards your other foot "Not even my parents?" You asked quietly, as you remembered their off putting behaviour earlier.

Nate looked up at you "Not even your parents." he assured you, wondering why you suddenly thought of them, and not the countless guys that can't help but stare at you every day. "Why do you ask?" He finally asked.

You shrugged "I don't know.. They were acting weird earlier. I feel like they're plotting something to break us up.." you admitted. "I didn't want to tell you earlier, because I wanted you to enjoy your party.”

Nate clenched his jaw, not because he was angry at you for telling him now, he was angry at your parents for constantly making you worry.

They're bad for you, no doubt. And he couldn't wait for the day you'd be free from them.

"Don't worry, princess," he cooed, as his hand wandered towards your knee, rubbing it comfortingly "You'll always be mine, they're not gonna stop me. Never." he assured you, before finally removing your other shoe and placing it next to the other one.

Then he stood up again, before disposing his shirt and tossing it onto the floor. Your eyes immediately moved from his face to his chest, still in awe at how muscular he was at his age.

When your hand reached out to touch him, he reached for it, before guiding it over his abs, down to the waistband of his jeans. He presses your palm against the growing bulge there.

"Fuck, you have no idea what you do to me," he rasps, his eyes closed as he enjoys your touch. Your eyes widen as you feel him in your hands. "Is that why you wanted to get home so fast?" You grinned, still bold because of the alcohol in your system.

Nate nodded, chuckling darkly "I wanted to leave with you the moment I saw you in that dress." he admitted, before opening his eyes, the sight of your face so close to his crotch almost ripped a moan from him.

What if he'd just use your mouth until you begged him to let you breathe again? Was all he could think about. It was your fault for looking up at him so innocently.

But once again he stayed strong. He didn't want your first blowjob to be while you're shitfaced, he wanted you to be fully aware while you do it.

When you felt him twitch in your hand, you removed your hand, blinking quickly "Is everything okay?" you asked concerned "Yeah, I just got lost in thoughts." he explained.

When your hand moved back to his jeans, and fumbled with his belt, he chuckled "Are you that impatient, baby?" he asked, his tone teasing. But you smirked in response "I think you're the one who's impatient." You retorted, a smirk etched onto your face that set something off in Nate.

You were so.. bold.

But it didn't bother him. In fact, it made him want to use you in every way possible, because he knew the moment he'd be inside you, that bratty attitude would disappear.

He always was so gentle with you, because he had no reason to be rough. But if you kept that act up, he might have to change his ways for the night. "Careful baby, you don't wanna make me mad." He warned, but his tone was still playful.

You pressed your thighs together at the subtle warning, god you needed him so bad. "Maybe I do." You smiled, before you realized what just slipped out of your mouth.

Nate scoffed, looking down at you as if you were the most prized possession ever. "Yeah? You think you could handle me getting mad?" Nate's voice was calm, as if he was testing the waters. His hands moved down to grip your thighs tightly as he bent down. "Because baby, I don't think you can."

"Try me." you challenged him playfully, clearly unaware of what you'd get yourself into. He chuckled drily as he shook his head. Then his gaze moved back to your face "I mean," you started as you shyly looked down "maybe you'll actually enjoy it that way.."

Nate's brows furrowed, as he tried to understand what you're implying "What do you mean?" he finally asked. You were fidgeting with your fingers as you pouted.

"I don't know.. I just feel like you're not fully enjoying it. At first I thought it's because I'm not attractive enough or anything," you stated, which resulted in Nate furrowing his brows even further because he couldn't believe you actually still thought that way. "but now I just think.. you're hiding something from me."

Why did you have to be so cute?

He searched your eyes, looking for a sign that he could tell you the truth without you being weirded out. Of course he enjoyed having sex with you, even when he wasn't his usual rough self. But even he couldn't deny the fact that he was holding back all the time.

He sighed before trying to find a way to explain it to you "I'm not hiding anything from you, it's just... I don't want to hurt you, or make you feel uncomfortable.." he explained.

You tilted your head, as you looked at him in confusion. "But I am comfortable with you. And.. if I'm uncomfortable with whatever it is you'd do, I'd tell you and we can just.. do something else." You assured him with a smile. He knew you wouldn't tell him you're uncomfortable.

You never did.

You didn't when Nate made you change your style, You didn't when Nate asked you to try on the lingerie and you sure as hell didn't, when he drove like a lunatic earlier.

Did he use that to his advantage? Definitely, but at the end of the day you can't be mad at him for crossing the line when you're too scared to tell him, right?

Nate sighed in response before shaking his head. You pouted as you looked up at him "What is it Nate.. tell me what you like." you pushed, to which Nate shook his head again "What is so bad that you can't even tell me?"

His jaw tensed, and for a moment it was so quiet, you thought he might ignore the question and get mad "I like control." he responded to which you furrowed your brows "But.. you are in control already.." you trailed off, confused by what he meant.

"Not like that, princess." he chuckled darkly, his patience wearing thin "Then how?" you pressed, your tone soft but insistent.

He ran his hand through his hair, sighing as he tried to find the right words "I don't just want control. I want all of you, completely." you blinked up at him, still as confused as before "But you have me, Nate." you whispered sincerely.

He shook his head, "Not the way I want." he finally admitted. "Then show me, or tell me how you want me." you whined as you looked up at him.

Nate searched your eyes for any sign of fear or doubt, but when he found none, he decided to tell you. He knew you still weren't sober, which meant that you'd react to it more casually.

And who knows, maybe you'd even forget about all of this once you'd wake up tomorrow. "I wanna make you beg for me, cry for me, fuck I just.." He groaned as he closed his eyes in an attempt to calm down.

But you still sat there, not even scared, like he feared. "Nate, I already told you that you can be yourself with me, and that I understand you. That also applies to this." You reminded him, as you took his hand in yours, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

You didn't want to admit it, the fact that you were excited, and that the thought of him being a little rougher ignited something within you. But you feared you might have to, in order to convince him to fully let go.

"And who knows.." you started, your tone playful, "maybe I'll like it better that way, too." you smirked, knowing that you probably would. "Let's just try it out, yeah?" you pressed, hoping to coax him in somehow.

He didn't respond, and the room filled with silence as he contemplated your words once more. With one final nod he leaned down to capture your lips in a soft kiss, a stark contrast for what was to come.

When he pulled back, his forehead rested lightly against yours as he whispered "I love you so fucking much, you know that?" you nodded, a soft smile on your lips. "I love you too."

He smiled back, but his smile didn't last long, as if a flip switched, his smile was replaced by an expression that made your stomach flip– a mix of hunger and want so intense, it felt like you've never seen it before.

His hands moved to the straps of your dress, his touch precise as he slid them down your arms. Once he reached your waist, he gave you a commanding look "Lift your hips for me, baby."

You immediately obeyed, as he pulled the dress off, leaving you in the special lingerie set Nate had bought you.

The one you wore during your first time.

His breath hitched for a moment before he chuckled breathlessly "Fuck.." he shook his head "you're insane." he declared, as his gaze lingered on your body.

You giggled in return "Am I?" you purred, as you shifted onto your knees and crawled further up the bed, giving him a perfect view of your backside.

For a moment he thought he'd lose it.

He'd already lose his mind when you were shy and anxious around him, always needing his reassurance for everything. But this? Seeing you all confident and seductive, almost as if you felt like you were in charge, probably turned him on just as much.

Because he knew he had the power to turn you into a mess in no time.

Nate was quick to undo his belt, and for some reason the sound of his belt clacking made you feel even more excited. Once he got rid of his pants, he climbed onto his bed, hovering over you.

You swallowed harshly, almost feeling like you got into trouble. He pushed one knee between your thighs, his two hands placed next to your head as he caged you under him.

"I'm gonna ruin you tonight." he simply stated, as his eyes bore into yours. But you only nodded and smiled up at him.

He leaned down towards your neck, his mouth leaving wet kisses along your sensitive skin, and for some reason that simple action already ripped a moan from you.

his kisses started becoming more hectic, until he finally started sucking a hickey onto your lower neck. You gasped, caught off guard by the pain, but growing to like it as your hand flew to his hair. "Mmh.. Nate.." you hummed, the ache between your thighs growing stronger.

Nate noticed it as well, simply by the way you started squirming under him, and the increasing speed of your breathing.

He lifted his head to look at you, smirking as he saw the desperation in your face. His hand moved down over your stomach, causing you to shudder, until it reached the waistband of your panties.

"You're so sensitive tonight," Nate chuckled when his hand wandered further down, feeling the wet patch on your panties.

Your mouth parted slightly when his fingers pressed onto the damp spot, your hips bucking up in response. "What got you so worked up?" He added, his finger moving in circular motions.

You struggled to form a coherent sentence, the only thing leaving your mouth being gasps and broken moans. "I-I.." Nate chuckled as he watched you struggle. "we h-haven't done this in... so long.. fuck." you interrupted yourself, as Nate slid past your panties and inserted one finger into you.

He could feel how tight you were, clearly proving your point. "Mhm, you're right.." he nodded, as he felt your walls pulsate around him "You could've just told me that you needed me." he muttered, before kissing along your jaw.

"You know I'd never turn you down." he added, before plunging another finger inside. You nodded as a whimper escaped your lips "I-I know.." you whined, as your hands fisted the bed sheets.

Nate paid close attention to your face, as your brows furrowed in concentration. When he angled his fingers higher, he watched as your eyes widened, and your breathing became more irregular.

"Right here?" he asked cockily, speeding up his movements. You nodded as a string of moans left your lips. "Fuck.. oh my god.." you groaned.

Nate loved it when you'd curse, not only did you sound incredibly hot while you did it, it also felt like he was ruining you more and more.

He knew you were close, so close to your release, but he couldn't allow you to cum yet. Not when he wanted you to beg for him. With one final run against your way too sensitive clit, he withdrew his fingers, and you immediately felt empty.

You looked up at him as if you couldn't believe what just happened, but Nate just chuckled "Relax, I just wanted to remove your panties." He lied, as his hands moved back to your waistband, this time he didn't even need to tell you to lift your hips before he pulled them off in one swift move.

He hummed in approval, before leaning down to press kisses onto your soft stomach. You squirmed in response, desperately trying to move higher up the bed just to feel his mouth closer to– "Why are you moving so much?"

Nate pulled you back down, before he continued to kiss along your belly "Nate, please.." you whined, causing Nate to smirk against your skin. "Yeah?" he asked, as he glanced up at you. "Can you.. use your fingers again?"

He nodded, before dragging his fingers along your abdomen, "Like this?" he asked with a completely straight face. You only groaned in response "No not like that!" you retorted, as your hand moved down to his wrist, attempting to drag his hand further south.

But to your surprise, his hand didn't budge a bit "Nate!" you scolded, sulking as you looked at him "Yeah?" he deadpanned, clearly aware of what you wanted "You need to be more specific with what you want, Baby." he explained.

You pouted "Can't I show you what I want?" you tried to move his hand lower, but again, he didn't budge. He shook his head in response "No, but you can tell me what you want."

You huffed, before rolling your eyes "I want your fingers, inside me." you instructed, your tone way too bratty for his liking. His eyes turned dark as he glared at you "So demanding.. why don't you beg for it then?"

You scoffed, unable to believe he was being serious "Nate, please, I'm begging you." you pleaded, still trying to wiggle into the right position. "That didn't sound like begging, more like.. pleading." He rasped as he traced his fingers lower, until they brushed lightly over your clit.

You gasped, still bucking your hips in search for stimulation. "Nate, please, I-I already begged." You whined, to which Nate hummed "Yeah, but it didn't sound convincing the first time." he responded, before circling a finger over your entrance, his eyes practically glued to your face.

You continued to move around, until he placed his other hand onto your stomach to hold you down. "Nate!" you whimpered, as you threw your head back. "Please, please." You begged once more, the sound music to his ears, "Please what?" he responded, his finger still circling your hole.

"I need your fingers.. inside me, please." You breathed out. He nodded, "Good girl." he said, before moving further up, his face inches away from yours. You looked up at him, your eyes slightly glossy.

When he finally plunged two fingers back into you with ease, your eyes rolled back, enjoying the moment. But it was only short lived because Nate was quick to pull them out again, still not done teasing you. You whined again, close to sobbing.

He held them up for you to see "Look at that," he stated, scissoring his fingers, the string of your wetness connecting them "See how wet you are already?" he asked condescendingly, knowing you'd probably turn shy again.

Except, you didn't.

You were way too desperate to be shy "I know, please, why did you stop?" you pouted instead, not even paying attention to the way his fingers were glistening.

Nate scoffed before complying and pushing them back inside, his eyes never leaving yours. You moaned in relief, relaxing again as he pumped them in and out.

You closed your eyes when his thumb started to toy with your nub, but opened them just as fast when he halted his movements. "Keep your eyes open." He demanded before continuing, "W-why?" you asked, as you blinked up at him.

"I want you to look at me." he reasoned, before leaning down even further, his hot breath fanning over your face. You tilted your head, your lips parting as if you silently asked for a kiss.

And he knew, of course he knew, his mouth curving into a smile. He leaned down just enough for his lips to brush over yours.

The soft touch, made your breath hitch and you instinctively chased his lips, but he kept pulling back, only allowing your lips to brush against his.

When you whined, your eyes turning glossy once again, he finally leaned in, kissing you deeply, as his fingers moved faster. You moaned into his mouth as your brows furrowed, you were close. So close again.

When Nate broke the kiss, his lips still millimeters away from yours you panted "I'm close.." you whimpered, "Yeah?" he asked, as he felt you clench around him, ready to finally let go. You nodded, bracing yourself as your hand moved to his shoulder.

You were about to let the feeling of bliss and relief wash over you, but Nate removed his hand completely from your mound. And you just stared up at him, tears clouding your vision as you were unable to believe he did that.

You sobbed, as your orgasm slipped away. Your hand was quick to move down, ready to relieve yourself but just as you reached your clit, Nate's strong hand gripped yours and pinned it down, next to your head.

You sobbed again, tears rolling down the side of your face as you panted. And Nate was reeling, he was sure that there hasn't been a single moment in his life were he was this hard.

He couldn't even say anything, for a moment he just watched you cry and struggle under him. "W-why are you.. why did you d-do that?" you sobbed, waiting for him to do something, anything.

He cooed, as his hand came up to wipe your tears away. "I'm sorry, Baby." He apologized, but even in your current state you could tell he wasn't serious.

He slid off the bed to remove his boxers, when he saw your hungry gaze, he chuckled. "Do you wanna take 'em off for me?" He asked, as he stepped closer to you. And as if on command, you rolled over towards him.

Nate waited until your shaky hands pulled his boxers down, his length slapping against his stomach as he stepped out of his boxers. You almost audibly moaned at the mere sight, still shocked by how big he is, especially up close.

Your hand stretched out to touch him, but Nate's hand was wrapped around your wrist once again. You looked up at him through your wet lashes, as if you were waiting for him to let go so you could touch him.

"Say please." He demanded softly, and you immediately obliged. "Please." You whispered. He removed his grip on you, watching intently as you wrapped your hand around him, stroking his erection softly.

Nate groaned, until you looked up at him again "Can I try... Can I.. put it in my mouth?" You asked eagerly, your tongue swiping over your lips.

The question caught him off guard, but he still nodded "Go ahead, princess, but be careful." he warned, knowing how inexperienced you were.

You nodded before opening your mouth wide, your hand slowly leading his head into your mouth. Nate inhaled sharply when his leaking tip came in contact with your tongue.

You wrapped your mouth around his head, trying to get used to the foreign feeling, and the salty taste of his precum. You looked up at him for a second, until his intense gaze became too much for you.

Nate chuckled breathlessly "No, keep looking at me." he rasped. His resolve was starting to crumble, as he looked into your shy eyes. You were determined to take more of him into your mouth.

Nate threaded his hand through your hair, as he watched you struggle. The urge to push your head further down, and force his cock down your throat was immense.

But he couldn't afford to break your trust, so he slowly pulled you off, a string of saliva connecting your mouth with his length. And as if on instinct, your head leaned in again, ready to take him back into your mouth.

Nate tightened his grip on your hair, as he chuckled darkly "Look at you," he taunted "so fucking needy for my cock." You whined in response, starting to feel shy again as you averted your gaze. Nate tugged on your hair, causing you to gasp and look back up at him. "Did you like it?" he asked, to which you nodded.

"Yeah, I bet you did.." he scoffed, as his gaze wandered to your thighs, which were desperately rubbing against each other. "Nate.. please." You whined as your desperation for him grew.

"Please what?" He pressed, despite knowing what you were asking for "Please fuck me, Nate, I'm begging you." You nearly cried out.

Nate groaned in response, in love with the way you begged for him. He nodded, removing his hand from your hair before he slid back into his bed. You turned back onto your back, your legs instantly welcoming him back.

He wanted to degrade you so bad.

When he hovered above you, he leaned down again, kissing along your collarbone and your neck, just to torture you further. When he heard you whimper and beg again, he decided to lift his head and stop, before his hands wandered below your back to unclasp your bra.

Once the bra was roses anywhere in his room, his mouth was back on you, this time on your breasts. Usually you loved having his mouth on you, but right now you needed him to be inside you. So you begged again, hoping he'd finally give in.

And he almost did.

He brushed the tip of his dick against your nub, causing you to shudder beneath him. He was just about to sink into you when he realized something.

He wasn't wearing a condom.

He knew you were too far gone to care or to realize, but he wasn't. He wanted to push the doubts aside, especially when he looked into your eyes, seeing the way you were aching for him.

But what about the consequences? Would it be in his favour if you'd end up pregnant? Maybe your parents would take you away from him, move again, or maybe, just maybe, it'd tie you two together in a way that no one— not Max, or your parents, or anyone else— could undo.

The thought hit him like a truck, it was so wrong but he just couldn't help himself. The thought of getting you pregnant was terrifyingly tempting.

And you were completely oblivious, what if this was his only chance? The only chance to make the right thing for both of you?

But he also knew that it wouldn't be as easy as he imagined it to be. You would be angry at him, because you trusted him, you'd know that he wasn't drunk enough to 'accidentally' get you pregnant.

But maybe he could explain it to you, maybe you'd understand—"Nate..? What's wrong?" You whispered, worried you had upset him somehow. Were you being too needy? Was he angry?

His jaw clenched as he tried to make a decision, his hand gripping your thigh so hard you were sure it would bruise. "You're mine.. right?" he suddenly asked, his tone serious.

You smiled, your fingers trailing up his arm, "Always." you whispered, your voice soft and breathless.

Always— that word, the way you reassured him.

His grip on your thighs remained tight as he hesitated, frozen in place. You didn't even notice, shifting beneath him impatiently, almost as if you were luring him in to give in.

God, he wanted to, he wanted nothing else in that moment. The thought of making you his once again, was intoxicating.

But you were drunk, and as much as he internally screamed at himself to do it, another part—one that you had practically implanted in him during the time of your relationship—told him to stop.

You deserved this, you deserved a chance to think this through. This could, and would, change everything, and he wasn't in the position to decide that now.

He nodded, before he reached over the bedside table and retrieved a condom from one of the drawers. He quickly ripped the package and tossed it away, before sliding it over his by now painfully hard erection.

His jaw was still clenched however, and he was confused by how much you had changed him. It bothered him in a way, made him feel like he became soft. Usually he wouldn't give a fuck about something being wrong.

What were you doing to him?

He lined up with your entrance, before immediately diving into you with ease, a groan leaving his lips as you immediately clenched around him. Your eyes rolled back as you released a long moan, more than happy that you finally got what you wanted.

He groaned as he set a ruthless pace, slamming into you as you tried to catch your breath. Nate grabbed your thighs and pushed them further towards your chest, allowing him to go even deeper.

It was as if a flip switched inside him. He seemed so calm just a moment ago, but now he was beyond frustrated, both because he held back this entire time, and because he didn't like the effect you had on him.

You didn't care though, completely blending his voice out as you tried to finally reach your high. You knew he was talking to you, saying something about how you were changing him, and how he was about to ruin you now, but despite all that, you were too focused on the feeling of his deep inside you.

Until his hand was suddenly wrapped around your throat.

Your eyes shot open as you stared at him "I said fucking look at me." he gritted through his teeth, his pace not faltering one bit. You blinked up at him as his hand tightened.

Based on the look on his face, you should be scared and try to calm him down. But you weren't scared, in fact it turned you on even more, because it was such a stark contrast to the way he usually treated you.

This is what you meant when you told him to let go, and to be himself. "Nate." You choked out, your eyes once again glassing over. It took him a moment to realize how hard he squeezed your throat.

And it turned him on so much.

The fact that he got to decide whether you'll breathe or not was so thrilling, but it quickly reminded him of the way he choked Maddy and how much of a deal it was.

He grunted, just about to loosen his grip, when he felt you clench around him, your pussy literally pulsating as you stared up at him. He smirked as he looked down at you, halting his movements "Fuck.. you're into this, aren't you?" he taunted.

When you didn't respond and only whined because he stopped rutting into you, he chuckled mockingly "You're acting like a fucking slut." he spat, as he leaned down closer, watching tears form in your eyes again.

He loosened his grip, allowing you to talk. But you only coughed and cried out "Nate p-please.. I was so close.." you sobbed, your voice raspy from the rough treatment Nate gave you just mere seconds ago.

He blinked, unable to believe you were solely focused on the fact that he stopped pleasuring you, instead of the the fact that he degraded you.

"I know, baby.." He slowly continued moving again, causing your eyes to roll back immediately as you moaned loudly. "It's just so much fun to tease you, I can't help myself.. You look so pretty when you cry for me." He explained as he trusted into you harder again.

You panted as your hand wrapped around Nate's wrist. Not because you wanted to pull his hand away from your throat, but because you just needed something to hold onto as he wrecked you. "Nate, I'm gonna cum.. fuck.." you warned, knowing this one would be intense.

He nodded squeezing your throat once again "Beg for it.. beg for me to let you cum." you didn't waste any time as you begged, "Please, fuck.. Nate please.." you whimpered, continuing to plead as tears were starting to build up again.

Nate would love to continue watching you like this: desperate, fucked out, crying, but he decided you must've suffered enough. So his hand moved from your throat down your body until his thumb landed on your clit.

You started panting, getting closer and closer to your orgasm until the relief finally washed over you. You felt the world blur around you as you let the intense feeling wash over you.

Nate watched in awe as your face started to contort in pleasure, knowing he was the reason. It brought him closer to his release, as he continued to thrust into you.

You blinked up at him as you lazily shook your head, overwhelmed by the pleasure. Nate only chuckled "What? Too much?" when you nodded, he continued "Weren't you begging for this just a moment ago? I think you can take it baby.."

You whimpered as he continued to push into you, it all felt too much for you as your shaky hand reached out for his cheek "Nate.. 's too much.." you whispered shakily.

Nate groaned in response, getting closer and closer. He just couldn't stop pounding into you, it felt too good to stop, and you sounded and looked so pretty.

Your eyes rolled back as Nate continued to hit all the right spots, despite you being sensitive and completely overwhelmed by the feeling you couldn’t help it. It all felt too good.

"Fuck.." Nate groaned when you squeezed him tightly. He knew he could make you cum again, and he was going to do it.

His mouth was glued onto your neck as he continued to flick your way too sensitive clit “Gonna be a good girl and cum for me again?” he mumbled onto your skin as his thrust grew more deliberate.

The way he called you a good girl had your eyes rolling back into your skull. His rhythm faltered slightly as he fought to hold back. His mind was filled with you —your sounds, the faint scent of your perfume mixed with your very own scent, how perfect you looked beneath him.

“Nate!” You moaned, the only thing on your mind as you reached your high a second time. As your walls contracted around him, his thrusts grew erratic, he removed his hand from your clit and gripped your thighs as he rammed into you with force.

His body seemed to move on pure instinct, his muscles tensed as he released a low guttural moan, cursing as his climax finally washed over him. He shuddered as he emptied himself inside you, wishing the condom wasn’t between you both.

He savoured every second of his orgasm as he buried himself deep inside you one final time, his head resting in your neck. Your shallow breathing filled the room, as you laid there sprawled out.

Your eyes were closed as you tried to catch your breath. You almost felt weightless as you almost drifted off to sleep. Nate noticed that, as he looked at your face. His thumb stroked gently asking your cheek “Y/n?” he called out softly.

Your eyes opened slowly “Yeah..” you managed to whisper. Nate chuckled once he was aware that you’re fine. “Too much for you, huh?” he taunted, his voice showing signs of pride and satisfaction.

You gave him a weak smile as you shook your head. “No..” You protested, but Nate was clearly aware that you were about to pass out any moment. He chuckled as he slowly pulled out of you, drawing a groan from you.

He sighed, as he removed the condom and threw it into the bin. He wanted to draw you a bath and dress you into his shirt, but as he got out of bed you pulled the blanket over you and rolled onto the side without uttering another word.

He just stared at you for a minute, admiring his work as he took in the sight of your disheveled hair, the marks on your neck—for which you’d definitely scold him later on.

He went to the bathroom to freshen up a little, before he walked to his bed, turned the lights off, and laid down next to you, pulling you against him as he did.

You truly were his

✎ Jesus this took so long lmao, but I hope you’ll enjoy this chapter (even if it’s basically just smut💀) again, feel free to leave nee feedback because it always helps me improve!! ♡

- Cassandra

Taglist:

@lilyrachelcassidy, @endless----love, @sophsss867, @jennnsthings, @digitalpup444, @vividfleur, @tsofo26, @lunalvrsblog, @sunshinedaisy21, @carley12041 @cc13723things, @amortentiaaaa, @wtrpxrks, @faeryggutz

[m30wk1ttycat]

Could you write Afab reader x anya? Maybe them going on a walk

girlypop, yes, i gotchu :3

no warnings, just rlly short !! <3 note: this is my first time writing for anya, might be a bit ooc.

in her free time (or when she got overwhelmed with her studies), anya would go out on walks. clear her head a little, y'know?

this time, she decided to bring you along with her.

your phone buzzed, that all too familiar sound barely audible over the movie you were watching. you were about to ignore it, thinking it was just a notification from social media, perhaps one of your favourite influencers posting something. but, when it buzzed again, curiosity got the best of you and you found yourself taking the device into your hand.

2 new messages from anya.

yeah, that definitely wasn't one of your favourite influencers posting something.. oops.

anya : y/n, hey, are you free right now?

anya : i'm going out for a walk. just wondering if you'd like to join me

no way you were refusing that.

y/n : i'd love that, actually

anya is typing. . .

anya : great! i'll be at yours in 10.

10 minutes. not a lot of time to get ready, but who cared? definitely not anya. she wasn't the type to judge people (unless they were j*mmy, which was understandable), especially not you. besides, she's seen you without make-up, with a bad haircut, ugly crying over a bad breakup, drunk.. not once has she made a negative comment about any of that.

so here you were, standing outside your apartment, leather jacket worn over the olive green sweater you chose to pair with brown jeans. "hi, anya!"

she smiled. "hello. shall we, m'lady?"

her hand extended, waiting for you to take it. and you did, gladly intertwining your fingers together. you noticed that, in comparison to yours, her hand was cold.

"we shall indeed."

✮

you listened to anya talk about her day as you strolled through the park, hand-in-hand the entire time. she didn't seem to mind, and neither did you.

"oh my god, have i told you about the new tv girl album? it's releasing today, we have to listen to it when it comes out." (she is a canon tv girl fan. trust me bro)

"we will," you promised.

a squeeze, gentle yet hard enough to catch your attention. "hm?"

"thank you, y/n," she all but whispered, leaning her head on your shoulder. "oh, how i love you."

"yeah? love you, too."

there was a moment of silence, the only noise being the crunching of the fallen, rotting leaves under your feet.

then: "do you want to go to that coffee place where we usually go? my treat."

"what are you now, my sugar mommy?" a glare from the dark haired girl, lighthearted yet somehow still as scary as the real thing. "sure. let's go," you agreed.

this was definitely something you wouldn't mind doing more often.

[hard-core-super-star]

i'm the powder, you're the fuse [H.Steinfeld]

pairing: top!hailee steinfeld x bottom!stuntdouble!reader

summary: being hailee's body double doesn't shape up to be exactly what you planned...it turns out far better.

warnings: SMUT, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT -> VERY little plot; selfcest kink [R is hailee's body double and she's VERY into how similar they look]; hailee's kinda egotistical because...yeah; fingering [R receiving]; cunnilingus; grinding/lap dance; dirty talk; so much banter/bickering; dashes of praise; there's a mirror involved; light spanking; mentions of bruises [not related to the smut]; when will i learn to write endings lmao

wordcount: 4.2k

a/n: so...i might have taken my usual "fuck hailee steinfeld" thought a little too seriously this time 😅 in my defense...i have none, but i still had a great time writing this. usual "don't like don't read" type of vibes apply here. that being said, this is a reminder than my commisions are open AND i'll be opening requests starting tomorrow. [if you want priority, though, aka to ensure that i write your idea as fast as possible, commisioning something is the way to go] anyway, thank you so much for reading, i hope you enjoy <3

* * * * * * *

The rumors that surrounded Hailee Steinfeld weren't news to you. 

You weren't particularly interested in gossip, most people in and out of the industry would make anything up as long as it got them five seconds of relevance. You knew better than to believe everything you saw on the internet.

As far as you were concerned, the brunette was merely another, slightly conceited, talented actress. You would have been fine never going anywhere near her...if it weren't for the uncanny resemblance you shared.

Most of the time, it was simply annoying. You weren't an actress, not really, you had always been more interested in stunt doubles than any other part of movie making. Maybe it wasn't the most glamorous, and it was certainly the most dangerous of all the on-set jobs, but it was what you were drawn to.

Unfortunately, most people weren't drawn to you for your lack of fear or penchant for badass stunts. Most people were absolutely fascinated by how much you looked like Hailee. It was something you fought against for most of your life...until you got a call from her agent, asking you if you'd be interested to be Ms. Steinfeld's body double in the new season of Hawkeye.

A part of you wanted to say no just to piss everyone off. However, you couldn't deny how well they were willing to pay you and how many doors working with Marvel would open for you. So, even though the last thing you wanted was to be in a room with her, you took the job.

All you were told was to change your workout regimen to match Hailee's and to fly out to New York two months before shooting started to get you fitted for the costume. It sounded far easier than you would have thought but then again, you were already halfway to basically being Hailee so it wasn't like there was much work to do in that department.

Well, besides work out. Which, again, wasn't that much of a sacrifice. Especially when your body started changing to show the results of your hard work.

Time ended up passing faster than you would have thought and before you knew it, you were on your way to your first costume fitting. You weren't too excited about it since you'd heard Hailee would be there, mainly to make sure the costumes were as identical as possible and there were no noticeable differences between you.

You already knew there wouldn't be, considering what people had told you for the past few years of your life.

Still, you knew it was routine and there was no point in turning it into a bigger deal than it needed to be.

At least that's what you kept telling yourself as the actress quite literally ogled you. You couldn't really blame her, your workouts had given you a more than impressive physique and you were very proud of the discipline it took to create the abs that now graced your stomach.

Hailee didn't need to know that, though, but she made it incredibly difficult to avoid the conversation.

Then again, it was like the only conversation she wanted to have with you had something to do with your looks. It was annoying but you were used to it.

What you weren't used to were the endless strings of compliments she was throwing your way.

It was easy to ignore it that first day. To chalk it up to her personality, maybe even her shock at how alike your looks are. Anything and everything except the obvious truth that she found you attractive.

Maybe it was your own insecurities that held you back from seeing the truth or maybe the weirdness that came with her being attracted to you when you looked so much like her. Something that shouldn't have made you pause as much as it did, considering the way she always paused to look at her reflection in the mirror.

Whatever the reason, the outcome was the same.

You ignored most of the compliments she threw your way while doing everything in your power to focus on the work and nothing else. It was easy at first, the stunts they had you doing were thrilling enough to keep your attention for long periods of time.

As the days went on, though, you found yourself growing closer to Hailee, despite how hard you had tried to stay away from her. Then again, it wasn't like you could do much to fight it when she went out of her way to spend time with you in between scenes.

Foolishly, you believed it was simply because she was trying to be nice, maybe give you some guidance since you were new to Marvel projects. To her credit, her intentions weren't fully bad...but there was certainly something else simmering beneath the surface of her warm smiles.

Something that you were too blind to see.

At least, until you finally allowed yourself to admit how attracted you were to her.

In all honesty, admitting the true weight of you feelings wasn't hard, especially considering how often she invited you out to dinner where the conversation flowed almost as easily as the wine. The issue was making sure said feelings didn't get in the way of your job, you were a professional, after all.

Hailee, one the other hand, didn't really care about being sneaky. Maybe it had a lot to do with the executive producer credit she'd managed to talk the director into or the obvious privileges she received as the lead of the show. Whatever the reason, the outcome was the same.

The more obvious the looks she threw your way became, the less restraint you started showing on set. Especially after a long day of tiring stunts.

It's how you found yourself walking back to her trailer, the brunette's arm wrapped securely around your waist to help you stay upright. Just because you weren't seriously hurt didn't mean you weren't sore and aching all over.

"What's wrong with you?" Hailee asks, her tone filled with amusement. "I thought all those muscles would break your fall."

"Ha ha, very funny," you reply. "I seriously regret not telling them to add more pads to the suit."

"Yeah, but you don't need the pads. You already look good."

This time, she actually gets a laugh out of you. Her contast flirting has a way of balancing between being annoying and endearing. Today, the balance seems ot be closer to endearing...or maybe, you're more tired than you originally thought. "Do you ever stop flirting?"

"Nope," she says with a smile. "It's not my fault, you're hot."

The emptiness of the set around you allows you to be more relaxed than usual which in turn allows you to tease Hailee for her very obvious attraction to herself. Weirdly, you didn't mind it. If anything, you found it a little flattering. Looking like this took quite a bit of work, after all.

Maybe it says more about you than it does about her, but that's beside the point. The same way she'd made a habit out of flirting with you, you'd made a habit of calling out her slightly narcissistic tendencies.

"You only think that because I look like you."

Hailee takes your teasing in stride, a soft laugh making its way past her lips. "And? That doesn't make it less true."

Somehow, you should've seen her response coming.

"You are so annoying."

"And hot," she says with a shrug, as if your words simply bounce off her.

"Keep telling yourself that."

"Oh, I will."

Honestly, you have no doubt she really will. As much as you want to hate her for it, you can't. Mainly because she's not wrong. She really is attractive.

It doesn't help that she has the charisma to make her massive ego seem charming instead of ridiculous. You have no doubt it'll backfire on her at some point soon, but for now, you'll just enjoy it.

The brunette leads you to her trailer, helping you inside and watching as you stretch out your sore muscles. Muscles she can't stop herself from admiring.

You're not sure where it comes from, or why you let yourself speak the thought outloud, maybe it's a testament to how safe she makes you feel or how unbearable your crush on her has become. Whatever the reason, the second you form the thought, you spit it out without a second thought.

"Can you help me take the suit off? The zipper's been really stubborn lately."

The silence that follows borders on unbearable. 

You can't fully figure out what the look on her face means. It makes you want to curl into yourself and disappear. To make a stupid joke and act like you never said anything in the first place. Like you totally didn't embarrass yourself in front of your unrequited crush. (An unrequited crush who is secretly thinking about jumping your bones)

"Are you...sure? I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

"It's fine, Lee. I wouldn't have asked you for help if I couldn't handle it."

Your words seem like a bit of an understatement. Technically, you're not sure if you can actually handle it, but you'll be dammed if you don't take advantage of the moment. Of the brief flash of confidence that led you to ask her for help in the first place.

All she offers is a nod before her body starts moving. There's something weirdly intimate about the whole situation, about the way her eyes are locked on yours through the mirror in front of you. It's overwhelming in the best way.

Hailee steps forward until her front is almost pressed up against your back. The warmth of her body makes you shiver, but it's nothing compared to the feeling of her hands on you and it takes all your self-restraint to not gasp in response.

There's a teasing edge to her touch as she drags her fingers across your shoulders, caressing your skin until she reaches the zipper of your top. She drags the zipper down slowly, revealing your back muscles and the few faint bruises that litter your skin.

"Do those hurt?" She asks, a hint of concern overtaking her usual playful tone.

"A little," you respond with a shrug. "I'm used to it."

She hums  as her eyes scan your back, her fingers not so subtly running down your spine. It's a soft touch, but it makes you shudder all the same.  "How do you make it look so easy?"

If you didn't know any better, you might think she's being genuine. That there's care and worry behind her words. You know there isn't and yet...you let your mind wander anyway. "Because I'm good at my job."

Your words earn you a huff, and you watch her roll her eyes through the mirror in front of you. "And you say I'm the narcissist."

"Well, you're the one who wants to fuck herself." 

Even though you're merely trying to get under her skin, you both know there's at least a little bit of truth behind your words. It's clear in the way she can't stop admiring your back and the muscles you earned by training like her. By doing everything you could to look as much like her as possible.

"And you want to fuck me. It's the same thing when you think about it, honey."

"Oh, shut up. I don't want to fuck you."

"Yeah? Keep telling yourself that."

All she's doing is riling you up, you know that, and yet, as the fabric of your costume falls down your arms, you find yourself growing more confident. It's stupid to let yourself get carried away when Hailee is technically your boss, but you can't help it. You want to turn the tables on her. To make her speechless for once.

So, with a sudden burst of motivation, you turn around and push her back until her knees hit the couch behind her. You've never been more thankful for her ridiculous ideas and weird trailer requests.

"What's going on?" The brunette asks, although the smirk on her face tells you she already knows your plan.

"I'm going to make you eat your words," you reply as you do your best to sound self-assured instead of terrified.

Just because she flirts with you all the time doesn't mean she wants to do anything about it. Then again, judging by the look on her face, there are a lot of things she wants to do about it.

"I'm sure I'll be eating something soon..." She trails off, her silence leaving no room for alternate interpretations.

 You can't stop yourself from rolling your eyes. "Are you always this horny?"

"Apparently only when I'm looking at myself."

"Yeah, that makes sense."

She rolls her eyes, but the action is filled with more amusement than annoyance. It's not like she can act offended when she knows it's the truth. She loves nothing more than staring at herself, something that's become very apparent lately.

You take a second to try and calm your speeding heart before turning around slowly, making sure to roll your hips and give her an enticing show.

There's something slightly embarrasing about what you're doing, about the half-dressed state you're in, the borderline desperate edge to your movements. It should be a lot of things, but all it is is incredibly arousing.

You do your best to move slow, to tease her just as much as she's been teasing you lately. You're not sure who finds the slow pace more difficult, to be honest.

"Fuck," she groans. "You're playing dirty."

"Is that a complaint, Miss Steinfeld?" you reply with another shake of your hips. "Because I have no problem with stopping right now."

You take the opportunity to rub your ass against her lap and you hear her sharp intake of breath. The fabric that separates you isn't thin enough to let her feel everything, but it's a start. 

And it drives her absolutely crazy.

"Don't you fucking dare stop." Her tone leaves no room for arguments, especially when paired with the way her hands come up to grip your hips.

All you can do is smirk to yourself and continue your teasing movements against her lap. Her grip on you tightens as she pulls you closer to her, her hips not so subtly bucking upward in search of friction.

You know you should feel bad about what you're doing. At the very least, you should feel stupid for letting yourself get carried away like this. Maybe even dirty for allowing Hailee to touch you, to admire your body and the similarities it carries to her own. There are a lot of things you should be feeling, and arousal is definitely not one of them.

And yet...it's the only thing you can think about.

The brunette's hands pull you back until you're sat on her lap, and you tilt your head back in response to the contact, baring your neck to her approving gaze. "You look so much better like this."

"Why?" You reply in a breathless whisper. "Because I look like you?"

"That's part of it, yes."

You're not sure why, but instead of annoying you, her words light a fire within you that you're not sure you'll be able to put out on your own. Admitting how turned on you are seems impossible, even embarrassing, since you've spent the last few months making fun of her and calling her a narcissist for being so attracted to herself. Thankfully, Hailee doesn't need words to realize what's going on with you.

The brunette leans down, her lips coming into contact with your flushed skin and sending sparks of pleasure down your body. As if that isn't enough to turn your thoughts to mush, her hands slide down to grip your thighs, firmly spreading them open.

"You're such a hypocrite," she murmurs against your throat. "You want this, don't you?"

A part of you wants to lie, to pretend you don't care about this, about her. To act like you haven't thought about this moment far too many times since she started shamelessly flirting with you in front of everyone.

However, you can't deny how turned on you are. How desperate you are to feel her hands on your skin. To let her lose herself in your body.

It goes against everything the logical part of your brain is saying, but you don't care. You're too far gone to back out now. "Yeah...I do."

Your words earn you a sharp nip to your neck and you arch your back against her. "There you go, that wasn't so hard to admit, was it?"

As badly as you want to talk back to her, she springs into action before you even get the chance to open your mouth.

This time, she's the one who pushes you around, leading you right over to the nearest vanity. There's something incredibly fucked up about being bent over where she sits every day for hair and makeup, but clearly, the mirror in front of both of you is enough to distract her from that fact.

Her eyes are glued to the reflection, to your bent over form and the perfect picture the two of you make. To the almost identical looks on your faces, cheeks flushed, eyes dark with desire, lips parted in search of more.

It's dirty and sinful and so, so beautiful.

Her hands are still glued to your hips, her grip growing stronger with every passing second.

Suddenly, a thought pops into your head. One that's almost as bad as the one that started this whole thing.

You almost don't say anything, but then your eyes meet hers and everything comes crashing out of your mouth.

"You can do it if you want, you know," you say, your voice barely above a whisper.

Her eyes widen almost comically, accidentally giving away how well she understands what you're talking about. "What?"

You momentarily consider retracting your words but you can't deny how much the thought excites you too. How willing you are to bend the rules of what's considered appropriate for her. After all, it's just a bit of roleplay, right? What's so wrong with that?

"Come on, Lee, I'm not an idiot," you reply. "If you want to fuck yourself, you have to commit."

Your words clearly send her mind spinning. You both know exactly what you're talking about, it's obvious in the way her lips find their way into her usual smirk.

"Are you- what are you...are you sure? It's...that's okay with you?"

Her hesitation is a little adorable. For someone so adamant that things be done exactly how she wants them, it's a little endearing how slow she's taking things for once. How sure she wants to be that this is something you actually want.

As if you haven't been imagining this exact scenario since the day you met.

"I'm sure, Hailee. I want this too."

Your confirmation is the only thing she needs to throw all caution to the wind. You see it in the way her eyes narrow slightly, almost as if she's accepting the challenge.

Her hands leave your waist long enough to drag the rest of the suit down your body. The strength behind her movements leaves you breathless and not so subtly pushing back toward her.

"Holy shit," she mutters. "You've been hiding this from me the whole time?"

"I told you I'm good at my job," you reply. "A couple extra workouts a week go a long way."

Your words earn you a low chuckle, satisfaction blooming in your chest, before her hand comes down harshly against your ass. The sting is far more pleasurable than it should be and it wipes out any hope of coherent thinking.

"Keep talking like that and I'll have to gag you...Hailee."

"Oh, fuck," you whimper.

Hearing her call you by her name shouldn't be as hot as it and yet here you are, practically flooding your panties from the sound of it. From the unrestrained desire that's so clear in her voice.

"I guess you weren't lying, you really do want it, don't you?" She leans down over you, practically trapping you against the vanity.

Her hand snakes its way between your bodies, her fingers trailing a teasing path down your spine until they reach the soaked fabric of your panties. You both groan at the contact and she wastes no time in pulling the fabric to the side and sliding her fingers through your folds.

"Such a dirty little thing," she says, her voice a rough whisper against your ear. "Want me to fuck you? Make you scream just for me?"

"Yes, please, I need you."

"You need me?" She repeats, clearly basking in the ego-boost your words provide her with.

You open your mouth to respond, to tell her to stop being dick and just fuck you already, but she beats you to the punch. She quickly slides two fingers into your cunt, sinking them in with zero restistance and making you cry out at the feeling of being filled up so deliciously.

Hailee leans down to pepper kisses across your shoulders as she gives you a chance to adjust to the sudden intrusion. Even when she's clearly wanting to be rough, she's doing what she can to keep you comfortable.

"You feel so good, darling. Taking my fingers so well." The second the words are out of her mouth, she starts thrusting her fingers in and out of you.

"Hailee," you moan, your eyes still glued to the mirror in front of you. It gives you a sight you'd never have thought you enjoyed so much, but the evidence is clear in the arousal that threatens to slide down your thighs.

"I know," she replies, not doing anything to hide the smugness in her tone.

Her fingers speed up as she lifts her head and stares you down through the reflection. Your walls instantly clench around her, your lips parting around her name once more.

This time, you're graced by the sight of the smile you've grown to adore. "We should've done this a whole lot sooner."

You nod in agreement and she slides her free hand down to join the first one, her fingers finding your throbbing clit and adding to the overwhelming pleasure. "Fuck- Please, don't stop."

"Wouldn't dream of it, Hailee." You're not sure what it is about her words that sets you off so badly, but the pleasure takes you completely by surprise. Hailee notices, though, and she speeds her movements up accordingly to bring you closer and closer to the edge.

"Come on, baby, I know you want to fall apart for me, do it. Cum for me."

You wouldn't deny her even if you could.

You say her name like a prayer as her touch sends sparks of pleasure down your spine. It doesn't take more than few moments for a particulary hard thrust to send you hurling toward your orgasm, walls fluttering around her fingers.

"Fuck...there you go."

She works you through your orgasm, going back to kissing and nipping your shoulder as she slows down her pace. It does little to soothe you and the overwhelming need you still feel, but you appreciate her efforts all the same.

"You doing okay?" She mumbles, slowly easing her digits out of your sensitive pussy.

"Yeah, just...a little out of breath."

"I thought that's what all the workouts were for," she teases as she shifts back.

You're about to complain about the sudden lack of contact when you watch her drop down to her knees behind you. Your breath gets knocked out of your breath once more and you know there's no way you'll be able to go back to normal after this.

Then again, that doesn't seem like such a bad thing now. Especially when her tongue is darting out to taste your arousal.

You buck your hips back against her mouth which makes her chuckle. "Still so eager, aren't you? It's alright, show me how much you want me."

You don't give yourself enough time to think about her words. You simply do as your told, rolling your hips and feeling her tongue explore your soaked folds.

You're a little too sensitive to take it, but that doesn't stop her from wrapping her lips around your clit and sucking hard enough to make your whole body shake.

"Holy shit, Hailee-"

She hums in response, the vibrations turning your legs to jelly. It's more than a little embarrassing, but completely justified considering the situation.

It takes her no time to make you fall apart for her again. You can practically feel her smirk as she swipes her tongue through your folds once more, collecting your release.

She leans back once it's clear you can't take any more stimulation, placing kisses across every inch of skin that's close to her. "So...how long until you can return the favor?"

You laugh despite yourself. "Oh, fuck off."

[spicythistlesatdawn]

If dark stories aren't your taste please skip this one

Pairings: poly!141 x oc (Thistle)

CW: torture, ptsd, inaccurate medical and military stuff. dead dove do not eat. Angst. I am literally planning to hurt your feelings with this one. There will be some comfort because I'll be hurting my own feelings to write this as well

This fic has to do with how Thistle met 141 and why she's with them.

"Ach, cannea believe it's been six feckin years cartin yer ass aboot with us," Soap was slurring slightly, the third pint he'd been nursing was loosely gripped as he looked at Thistle. The dark-haired woman frowned and mulled that over. Six fuckin years. That was a long time to know people. It'd been five years of living with them, and four that the five of them had agreed to a tentative relationship. Today, they were celebrating her "birthday".

"Six years to the day," she said softly, watching how Simon settled into the booth and crowded Johnny closer to the middle. Keep the little shit from sprinting off as he tended to the deeper into his beer he got. Gaz was on her right, leaning his head on her shoulder as he simply mellowed out with the buzz in his veins and humming to whatever little tune played in his mind. Currently Hot to Go was the favorite of the hour.

"Does bein a year older feel much better this time 'round?" Simon asked as he hooked his arm around Johnny, the younger man mumbling something a tad incoherent. There was something to be said for this night, with each passing year the memories faded just a little more.

The room she was locked in was cold, dark. The only sound she could hear was an insistent drip of water meant to drive her out of her own head. There had been screaming earlier. Her throat was raw, so maybe it had been her screaming. She couldn't remember. She couldn't remember much currently. Shifting from the spot she had taken on her knees, a strangled noise left her. She must have been in this position for a while. Her knees had locked, and the slices up her right thigh had crusted over. Her entire left thigh felt like flames were eating at it, deep divots having been taken out of the flesh. She knew better than to make a noise, and noises made them mad.

"-le. Thistle." Her head snapped up, mind pulling from the trenches as she blinked rapidly. Price was staring at her now, concern etching even more wrinkles into that handsome face. "You with it, lovie?"

"Aye... yeah. I'm here, Cap..." she was not with it. Too much alcohol, it was wearing her mind down. Nagging at dormant memories. "The youngins look like they need carried home." She said even if she was barely older than Soap and Gaz by three years. The thirty year old numpties were by classification: lightweights. Soap more than Gaz.

Gaz was currently playing with her free hand, admiring the scars over her knuckles and on her fingertips as he flipped it over. To and fro. She turned her head and nuzzled her nose into the twists she had pain stakingly helped him manage over the last two months. "M'not in need of carryin' lovie..." he murmured tiredly. Giving a blissful sigh when Price pressed into his other side. Thistle was effectively caged in by her four burly men and felt an odd peace settle in her shoulders.

They'd managed to get everyone home, Kyle and Soap had been placed in a shared room with the ensuite bathroom in case the poor fuckers puked. Simon and John took the other shared bedroom down the hallway, and Thistle was curled up on the couch. She wasn't ready to crawl into bed, and while it irritated Price, Si seemed to understand. This day wasn't exactly easy. On this very day, they'd found her, lost, broken, couldn't even remember her own name.

It was raining the men who'd been in charge of "cleaning" her were being loud. Sneering something at her. Something she couldn't understand because she didn't know what language they spoke in. When they manhandled her to clean her, she didn't fight, said nothing, she was a limp doll. The limp doll was still kicked around. Spat on. Demeaned and degraded. It had been like this for so long. She didn't even have the strength anymore to scratch a line into the wall. She couldn't even remember why in the world she was scratching into the wall. What the lines meant. The only thought in her pretty battered little head was her favorite weed. The one that stung and bit and left pain in ones fingers for days. A simple little Thistle.

Head empty. It's quiet. There used to be more screaming, but she couldn't say when that had been. How many voices there might have been. Someone had been screaming a name, "Kassandra!!". That was dangerous. Names are weapons and knowledge that let's someone dig deeper. Sink their twisted claws into your skull. Rip it open and sip at your own personal being. It felt like someone was ripping into skin. The stench of blood was clogging her nose. Head empty. No thoughts.

She jerked hard in someone's arms when she was scooped up. Her fist flew before her brain could register the arms that held her. Gaz let out a yelp and dropped Thistle when she blinked her eyes open she saw the poor man cupping his nose. She could smell blood and had to smack a hand over her mouth. Turning away from the poor man as he backed away. Whining about his nose. "Mah nose... jesuhs fuck.."

"Christ, Thistle, what did ye do to poor Kyle?" Thistle wasn't able to respond, vaulting herself over the couch because her stomach would not fucking stop rolling. She was heaving now because she'd seen the crimson on Gaz's dark skin. Had caught another whiff of that vile copper. She didn't make it to a bathroom. Hands and knees wretching on the floor as Soap called for Price.

Distantly, Thistle was aware of more feet. Heavier steps. Someone calling her. Hands and knees, heaving until her stomach was emptied. Head throbbing.

Price was there in an instant, scooping up Thistle. Speaking lowly to Soap to get Kyle to the guest bathroom to clean up. He was aware of the way that Thistle went limp when he scooped her up. Clutching her that much closer as he took her to the master bedroom. Simon had put himself on clean-up duty in the end. Getting the rags and the scented cleaning supplies. Anything but bleach, knowing the lingering burn of it would make matters worse once Price managed to bring Thistle back to them.

"I didn't mean to startle her so bad.. I just wanted to bring her to bed with Tav and I," Simon listened quietly as Gaz explained softly. Johnny was currently in the process of starting laundry for Gaz. Making sure all signs of blood had been scrubbed away. She'd gotten Gaz pretty good with her flailing arm. He was touching his sore nose gingerly and looking it over with a down turn of his full lips.

"You know she'll be pleadin f'r forgiveness the moment she sees ya. Won't let you take none o' the blame," Simon soothed gently. They'd all startled her at one point or another. Hell, he'd scared the daylights out of her so badly once he was sporting a stab wound in his thigh. Gaz looked right wrankled about it, though. To some extent, the man was reasonably upset that he'd been whacked hard enough that now his nose looked slightly puffy, and his eye lids looked like he'd taken the brunt of a fist. But he was also beating himself up for scaring their Thistle so badly. None of them could actually predict when Thistle would come out of it. Price had gotten her bathed, dressed, and into the master bed. She'd yet to respond to the soft plea of their captain.

It's cold again. Her toes are sinking into snow, and she's running. Someone made a mistake. Someone left the door open. She'd been so motionless for so long. Nothing but a pile of mutilated flesh and blood. Reeking of infection and so still. The copper tang of blood clogged her nose. Not even fresh snow could clean it. Not even water when she fell through the river. Body shaking and mind reeling. Where was she. Who was she. Was this real? It must be. Red was staining the snow where she lay. Spreading its cruel tendrils and using her life force to soak into the soil. If she died here, she hoped thistles would bloom. She prayed that thistles would bloom in the hearts of those who wasted her blood. Wasted the blood of faces she no longer had a name to.

"Cap! Steamin' Jesus... Cap we goot a boady!"

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♥︎♡♡♡♡♡♡♥︎♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Feck it. This is part 1 my guys.

:) swearsies there'll be more.

[sinsmockingbird]

Five threesome pairs I want to be apart of. They'll be listed from the pair I want to be in between the most of, to the I still want to be in between them but not aching for it. For @sea-lanterns.

✧ GENSHIN IMPACT

1.) Raiden Ei & Yae Miko. I love these two, I love the ship (for the most part) and love their dynamic. I just know being in bed with them both is fucking crazy, and I want to experience that. Miko teasing the hell outta me and Ei, while the Archon is just getting a sweet tooth off me.

2.) Beidou & Ningguang. How can I not want to be with these two!? Lesbians, I love them, I want to witness their banter in bed while they pleasure me. You know Beidou is more rough and sloppy while Ningguang is slow and precise (great with her tongue).

3.) Arlecchino & Furina. Yes, a more toxic pairing with pretty dead dove themes, as deemed by the fandom. I don't fully ship them, but I just want to ruin Furina with Arlecchino. I want us both to make her cry and beg from our teasing, we'd be good cop bad cop.

4.) Ningguang & Ganyu. I'm sorry, but Ningguang has made it up here twice, because fucks sake I want her. I want these two to be slow and gentle with me, particularly after a hard day. We can take a warm bath and then after have loving sex.

5.) Shenhe & Yelan. Being tied up by Yelan and just having Shenhe all over me is.... yeah. I'm not too into Yelan, but goddammit, I am very into Shenhe.

✧ HONKAI STAR RAIL

1.) Black Swan & Acheron. The only reason this is number one is from that YouTube video. The two at, 2, were originally here, but it's changed. I want to be fucked hard by Acheron and become traumatized with Black Swan. I'll be the one to bring these two back together.

2.) Kafka & Himeko. I don't think much has to be said as to why, I mean... the chemistry between these two and the obvious history. Plus I want Kafka to ruin my pussy while Himeko is there comforting me, and allowing me to suck on her boobs. Best therapy fuck, right here.

3.) Stelle & Firefly. Let me please dominate and tease these two!! Oh my god I want to make Stelle squirm while I jerk their cock off and make sure she gets to the point of release before stopping. Then making Firefly a flushed mess while she watches, touching herself until I go between her legs-!!! God I want them.

4.) Jingliu & Yukong. My tragic old yuri women. Deranged Jingliu fucking me hard and in heat Yukong- yes I want to be bred and knocked up. I don't want to leave that bed until I'm filled with their cum, okay!! Plus, they both just need love.

5.) Serval & Natasha. This is a rare pair between two old women I love so much. We need Natasha to heal Serval's broken heart, the one Cocolia left her with, she is a doctor after all. And if getting into bed with them will start that? Then 100% we're doing that.

✧ PATH TO NOWHERE

1.) Zoya & Angell. After that fanart I saw with them both, and that thirst I wrote as well, I've never wanted to be between two women more. I want them to try and stake claim on me, fighting over me even as they fuck me dumb. I don't care how many bites and scratches I have on my body after.

2.) Shalom & Rahu. I want Rahu fucking me raw, like a dog in heat, while Shalom watches and praises us both. I also want to participate in endlessly teasing Rahu and making her unable to cum until Shalom gives her permission. It's a coin flip with them both for me.

3.) Deren & Raven. Give me these two creative ladies and let me pull them into bed with me. Just knowing Raven would be very high energy with a low energy Deren is amusing, but it works. Raven is doing most of the work, not that she minds, while I lazily jerk Deren off. It's fucking heaven.

4.) Cabernet & Kelvin. Intimidated but aroused Kelvin, having her thighs pinned down on the bed with Cabernet eating her out. Then I'm on the side, teasing her nipples and marking her neck, praising her. I want it.

5.) Tetra & Pricilla. These two would be beyond teasing in bed, and you know what, I'd take it all. I want to their prized gem that they worship and love.

[whysamwhy123]

.

[angelltheninth]

Arcane Characters Make Food for You

Pairing: Jinx, Vi, Caitlyn, Maddie, Ekko, Vander, Silco, Sevika, Viktor, Jayce, Mel x Fem!Reader

Tags: fluff, established relationship, domestic fluff, kissing, making food, teasing

Ko-Fi | Rules | Fandoms and Characters

A/N: I already wrote this on my old blog but now is a good time to re-write it.

Jinx knows how to cook pretty well, surprisingly enough. Or maybe not so surprisingly given how she's always the one making things and experimenting. However that also means she might make some really weird meals.

It's something you'll have to deal with if you're with her and might have to develop a strong stomach. She already has it because she grew up in Zaun and ate a lot of different things. For you she wouldn't recommend some of them yet and she will try her best to make something that you'll like. And she won't get too offended if you don't eat her cooking right away.

"I made ya some breakfast, ta-da! It's a little sticky but don't worry, eat your fill and I'll clean up the mess later. Don't look at it like that, it might not look pretty but I promise ya it's so good. I could eat this every day. I hope I'll get to eat it together it with ya every day, sugar."

Vi doesn't know how to cook because she never had the opportunity to learn. The first few dishes are bad, like really bad, almost burn the toast and eggs type of bad but Vi she isn't the kind of person to give up. She'll keep trying until she gets it right.

There have been times where she did burn things and she won't let you eat it since it's not right. She wants you to have the best of the best, even if she didn't. Might get a little distracted when you're in the kitchen with her so she prefers to cook by herself even if you're there with her. Regardless of how many times she gets it wrong she at least wants to learn to cook your favorite.

"Yes, this is burned toast but this time it's not my fault, it's yours. Well you're the one who walked in here looking all cute and distracted me. One kiss is all it takes if it's from you, sweet stuff. Sit down and let me do this right and if you do you'll get something sweeter than this."

Caitlyn knows how to cook really well. She did grow up with people doing the cooking for her however she was curious and wanted to learn how to do it on her own. She's a very hand-on learner, now she can use some of her skills to make you happy.

She gets up really early anyways so she might as well make breakfast for the both of you. The first time she brings you breakfast in bed she thinks your reaction is cute, the way you stare at her, eyes wide and drooling over the food. For her it's not odd to have breakfast in bed. And if you stick with her you'll get used to her pampering you. Be sure to tell her how the food tastes.

"Good morning, darling, I brought you something. See, I didn't just brag about my cooking skills, this is me showing you I can cook. Showing off? Suppose I am a little bit, it's not my fault you didn't really think I would bring you breakfast in bed."

Maddie can cook some dishes but she can cook them well. Her skills aren't anything impressive but they don't need to be because she can get take out too. But she is more than happy to share what ever she makes with you.

She falls back on take out more often than she would like to admit. However not when she invites you over to her place, then she will put her best foot forward. A lot of that is because she wants to impress you hard, but it also gets her to work on her skills either way she wins. She keeps looking at you very intently while you take that first bite. Thankfully she doesn't seem to do a bad job if your smile is anything to go by.

"I'm not weird for watching you eat, it's called being smitten, gorgeous. Anything you do is interesting to me, you know that by now. This isn't empty flattery. I already got you to eat my cooking, I don't need to butter you up at this point."

Ekko isn't the best cook out there, he will be completely honest with you. While he does know the basic things you can't really expect anything fancy. If anything he focuses more on the dish being filling than tasty.

The thing about him cooking for the two of you is that he can only do it on his free time, which isn't a lot. Therefore he wants to make it a bonding activity. A cute date of sorts, mostly in the late evening when the rest of work is done. Sometimes he will try to surprise you but its hard when his living space isn't that big and everyone knows everything in the Firelights. The gesture counts.

"There wasn't much time so it's pretty simple, but at least it's your favorite, Firefly. No, I actually finished the new project, I had extra time to kill. Please, don't thank me! It seemed only right for me to make you something after you cheered me up this morning."

Vander knows how to cook really, really well. He kids to raise, and he was on his own for a very long time, he had to become a good cook. Plus he makes awesome drinks, being a good cook was a bonus skill for him.

He's always the first one to wake up and start the day in the Last Drop and he always makes breakfast for everyone. Not just breakfast but every meal, his kids need to eat a lot, there's always a little left over for later. Even if he feels a little sleepy himself he at least wants to put something on the table. It's the dad instincts in him. And husband instincts, hopefully.

"Don't ya even think about sneaking up on me right now, darlin'. I've got a pan full of sizzling hot oil in my hand, I don't want it all over us. Hugs are fine, I always love ya being close to me, but keep your hands to yourself. We both know ya get handsy in the morning."

Silco didn't know how to cook before he adopted Jinx, since then he's had to learn. It wasn't easy but now he does know a lot and he can impress the woman he's dating. Now when you stay over you can expect good for for your date, and good food when you wake up.

When the dating gets more serious he lets you help him cook, but until then he pretty much does it on his own. Jinx will go nowhere near the kitchen alone, not after that one explosion. He does have a list of recipes that he makes the most. And a few that he made up. Sometimes ingredients are hard to come by so he needs to improvise.

"Pass me the flour would you, love? This time I will follow the recipe, yes, the last time there was a bit too much sugar in there. I know you liked it but it's not the healthiest thing now is it? Fine, call me a worried dad, I know you think it's attractive."

Sevika isn't able too cook that well, she never was, she always liked others cooking for her though. However when you tease her about it she takes it as a challenge. And you know damn well that she doesn't back down from a challenge.

Curses a lot when she messes up, though you can bet that she's not gonna let food be the thing that beats her. When you walk into the kitchen it's a mess which will take a while to clean up. But at least she managed to make the dish this time and it's quite good. For her hard work you give her a very passionate kiss and that just makes her wanna work harder. That's the best reward she can ask for.

"One kiss for at that work, doll? I think I earned myself a little more than that, maybe you on the table instead of all this food. Yeah, I know it's gonna get cold, you're right. Can't let all this hard work go to waste, but when we're done we have to work all that food off."

Viktor doesn't have as much time to cook as he could if he worked a bit less. Not that his skills are award worthy but he can make a few things, at least in his opinion. Give his cooking a chance.

When he was a student in the academy he had to learn how to make quick meals and that is where most of his strength is. Just very simple dishes but he knows how to make them well. There are times when he himself forgets to eat so he makes sure he gets a good meal when he can. If you're part of that that's even better. Having you eat his cooking makes cooking more fun.

"If you think cooking this is so easy then you make it will you, beautiful? Ah so now you like it, I see how it is. I'm just kidding, I love making food for you when I can. But if you want to make it yourself please let me do a taste test first. I promise to be brutally honest, just like you are with me."

Jayce has absolutely no skills in the kitchen unless you need him to fix or build things in there. He knows this too and will admit it right away. Trust him he is much better in science than in cooking food.

That being said he will join you in the kitchen when you cook. He takes an interest in it because the way you cook makes his mouth water. When he learns about what your favorite food is he wants to lean how to cook it. However he does this in secret because he wants to surprise you. Sure enough he's able to get the biggest smile out of you when he presents you with your favorite meal.

"I learned it secretly, all for you, babe. Well I am quite good with my hands and I enjoy working, that was just another excuse to learn. Of course I don't have an ulterior motive for it! But if I did... and if it was kissing... would you kiss me for doing a good job?"

Mel is actually an amazing cook and knows a ton of recipes. Including your favorites of course. Do you really think she'd invite you over and offer you nothing to eat?

It's been a long time since she had to cook for anyone but herself but she's not bad at it at all. She has high standards when it comes to good food specifically because she holds herself to high standards. It doesn't matter how simple or complicated the meal is. When she invites you over and offers to make you food you better believe you're eating good that night. Not strictly food either.

"Beloved, slow down a little, the food isn't going anywhere and neither am I. We have all night. Every time I make food I do so because I want to enjoy a good meal, and you should too. And please be careful, I don't want you to choke, on the food that is."

[cherrygirlfriend]

bsf!rafe waking up with morning wood

warnings: smut (mdni) maybe somnophilia if you squint i guess? morning wood, me trying something new bc i came up with this random blurb i might try out writing other blurbs like this??? so if you have any ideas or pairings you want me to write for pls lmk because as much as i love writing +2k word fics it's fun to rewind by writing shorter stuff too

wherever rafe went, you followed; and even though it annoyed some of his friends, they didn't dare to say anything about it to rafe, because the one time they did, he got so angry they thought they were getting their asses kicked.

everywhere, also happened to include his bed. it had started after you had accidentally passed out on his bed from how much you drank, and he didn't care if you were there or not, he was sleeping in his own bed. now, it had gotten to the point where you couldn't sleep without him, and vice versa.

but you weren't a couple, of course not. rafe wasn't one for relationships, and you were just his friend since childhood, and even if he fucked you into the mattress a couple of times per week, or the fact that he never allowed any other girl to be in his bed, or that he thought of you whenever he hooked up with someone, it was just friendship.

"come on, wake up pretty girl..." he mumbled into your shoulder as you started stirring awake, rafe holding up one of your thighs up slightly as his hand rubbed his hard cock against your panty-clad pussy.

"come on, rafe..." you mumbled sleepily, and the blonde pressed a small, warm kiss on your shoulder over the fabric of his t-shirt. "why'd you wake me up? can't you see that 'm tired..."

"princess.. i need you..."

"rafe, we already went three rounds yesterday..."

"please, baby..." rafe mumbled, pressing soft kisses to your neck, the action causing shivers to go down your spine, and you could feel your panties starting to get wet, sticking to your puffy folds. "i'll do anything... just need you so much right now..."

you looked at him with half-lidded eyes as he pressed lazy kisses on your neck, "anything?"

"anything for you, princess. including murder."

"will you buy me those vivienne westwood earrings i want?"

"hell, i'll get a matching necklace."

and that's how you ended up with your best friend on top of you, pounding into your already sore pussy from the night before, your face pressed against the sheet as you let out moans that got muffled by the pillow, a handful of your hair around his fist as you closed your eyes in pleasure, your fists gripping the sheets to try and anchor yourself as he spoke in a low tone with every thrust "such a good girl for me... you're mine... this pussy's all mine... no one's gonna fuck this pretty pussy like i do..."

yeah. just friendship.

[talaok]

Giving up

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: Coaxing your neighbor into having sex with you although he's unsure since he's much, much older than you

Warnings: big ass unspecified age-gap, Jackson!Joel is a softie Smut| unprotected piv, crempie, insicure!joel, sub!joel, also my man has trouble lasting cause he's not done this in a very long time.

a/n:i needed to write some cheesy romantic stuff, and maybe it doesn't really make all that sense in this story and maybe i cried while writing this cause no one is ever gonna love me like this but so what bitch leave me alone (i also am i lil tipsy as i proofread this, so ignore any mistakes pls)

Part 1

"did you do something to your hair?"

Tommy was standing on Joel's doorstep, looking at him as if he were an alien.

"I washed 'em" he grumbled, "what do you want?"

His brother couldn't help but huff out a laugh

"someone's in a good mood today"

"I've gotta be somewhere, just tell me what you want"

Tommy's interest was only piqued more.

there stood his brother, his clothes perfectly clean- maybe even ironed- his hair... styled, his beard trimmed...

something was definitely going on.

"Where are you going?"

Joel rolled his eyes now, shooting his little brother a death glare

"none of your business"

Oh he knew what was going on...

"Who is she?"

"Tommy-"

"Is it Jessica? I bet 's Jessica, she's always flirting with you you ol' dog-"

Joel swore he was gonna punch him- he was already running late because of how long he took to pick his clothes- finding a flannel that wasn't completely worn out turned out to be real fucking hard.

He felt stupid for how much effort he'd put into getting ready, he felt stupid for how anxious he was, but most of all... he wanted his brother to go away.

"There ain't no one, Tommy- now, if there ain't anything you need, please go-"

But just then- just when he was finally going to get rid of him, your sweet, soft voice made its way to his ears.

"Hi Joel! Hi Tommy!" You smiled from your porch, waving your hand at him and his brother "You didn't forget about today, did you Joel?"

What in the actual fuck?

Tommy did a double-check, looking between you and his brother, and when he finally confirmed that it was actually him you were talking to, you whom he'd gotten all dolled up for, he couldn't do anything but let out a slow, long breath.

"No I didn't- I'll be there in a minute, darlin'!" Joel was answering you as his brother regained his ability to speak

"well... Fuck. Me" he was in awe, his voice barely a murmur

"it ain't like that" Joel was quick to intervene "'m just fix-"

"'m sure it ain't" Tommy let out a chuckle, his hand going to pat his brother's back "You fucking lucky bastard"

"Tommy I know she's young bu-"

"shut up man" he laughed "Just go have fun, you asshole"

__ __

"Sorry 'm late, Tommy was just-"

You smiled at his words, shaking your head

"It's ok, Joel" you cooed as you let him in,

He gave you a soft little smile, and you felt like the luckiest girl in the world.

Joel Miller didn't smile just at anyone.

"water?" you asked, leading him to the kitchen.

"Uhm- sure"

His heart was damn near beating out of his chest already- for no fucking reason at all.

Well except the obvious one... you'd sucked his dick and he'd eaten you out three days ago- and you'd made it clear you wanted more.

Jesus Christ, he felt like a fourteen-year-old with his first crush.

You watched him as he sipped on the glass.

"So?" a soft smirk was caged between your teeth "Did you think about it?"

He damn near choked.

Which didn't make any sense, he was expecting this, he already knew you'd ask.

He cleared his throat, diverting his eyes from you "I-I have"

"And?"

You'd gotten closer, your expectant eyes studying every inch of his face

pleasepleasepleaseplease say yes

"Did- didn't you have something that needed fixing?"

Oh for fuck's sake

"joel" you called for him in what almost sounded like a plead.

"darlin' just... lemme fix your cabinet first"

This man was gonna be the goddamn death of you.

"ok"

__ __ __

As it turns out, in many different ways.

Who knew watching him fix something would turn out to be so fucking hot?

He'd rolled his shirt up so that his strong forearms and a glimpse of his beautiful bite-worthy biceps were showing, his hands moved so very expertly that they couldn't help but bring back memories of what those same fingers had done to you just a few days ago, and his face... he looked so hot when he was all in his head, concentrated only on the task before him-

or so you thought.

"You're gonna stare at me the whole time?"

A soft laugh escaped your lips

"don't mind me- just enjoying the view"

He huffed out a laugh as he went back to work, but you couldn't help but notice the fact he pushed his sleeves ever further up his arms, giving you more of a view of his delectable skin.

What a tease

__ __ __

"there we go" he said after some time, opening and closing the cabinet one final time to make sure "all done"

For the record, this time you hadn't even done it on purpose, the cabinet had actually broken. It was like fate was sending you a message.

You awakened from your daydreams as he stood up to his full height, and hopped off the stool you were sitting on to walk closer to him, noticing some dampness in your panties while doing so...

It wasn't your fault... he was the one looking way too hot doing such a simple task.

"thank you" You smiled up at him, your hands going to his chest,

He held his breath for a moment

"'s nothing babygirl"

"yeah? then... you think you could check my bedroom too?" you were biting your lip in a way that made your question take on a whole different meaning "to make sure nothing needs fixing y'know?"

"In your... bedroom?"

"yes, Joel- please" you added, with your best innocent doe eyes.

Which of course made him fold in a matter of seconds.

You'd taken on a different tactic. It was obvious at this point that the man was too shy and too unsure to give you an answer (or the one you wanted to hear anyway), which is why you needed to present him with the actual possibility right in front of him.

And yeah maybe it was manipulative, but fuck it if you didn't wanna feel the man inside of you.

The flashbacks of what he did to you on that bed filled his mind the moment he stepped into the room.

He needed to get a grip or he wouldn't be able to hide his growing bulge in a minute.

"Everything seems right"

"yeah? 'm not sure about the bed" you hummed, desperately hoping he would just go along with it "it makes a weird sound when I get on it"

He turned to you then, his eyes locking with yours for an infinite second.

"try" you said finally, nodding to the bed.

He watched you for a moment longer before, surprising you, he did it- he sat on the bed.

The mattress creaked underneath his weight, and you made quick work of strolling closer to him as he pressed his palms on the bed, checking for the inexistent "weird sound"

"it don't look like there's anythin' wron-" he looked up the moment your hands found his shoulders "Whatcha doin'? sweethear-"

You were sat on his lap before he could even finish the sentence.

"Joel" you spoke his name softly, as if it were a caress, your hands slowly moving up and down from his shoulders to his pecs, as you finally scooted closer to him so your core was right against the hardness in his jeans-

He inhaled sharply, his fingers curling on the bed.

"would you like to have sex with me or not?"

You accentuated your words with a slow roll of your hips, grinding onto him and making a soft groan build inside his throat

"this- this ain't really fair sugar"

A smirk pulled at your lips as you lowered your head to whisper in his ear "I never said I didn't play dirty, Mr. Miller"

Your right hand trailed lower, moving down his belly so slowly that Joel thought he might just lose his mind.

"You're y-young baby-"

Your hand had found his crotch, the outline of his dick fitting in your hand oh so perfectly.

"we've gone over this already Joel, I'm old enough" you purred, your lips leaving a peck just below his ear "old enough to do many many things"

He cursed under his breath

"I just... I don't understand"

A breathy laugh escaped you

"there's not much to understand really" you murmured "You're hot, and I like you, and I wanna get in your pants"

That earned you a chuckle

"and you're sure you won't regret this?" he asked, "you sure this is what you really want- that- that you don't want to give a boy your age a chance instead of me?"

You smiled as you looked up at him,

you'd never met a man so sweet

"Joel, I promise you I'm sure" you whispered "I promise you this is what I want, you are what I want"

Fucking damn it

How could he ever say no after that?

With those gentle eyes of yours looking at him, with your hand right over his cock...

"So?"

He was gonna think about the consequences tomorrow. Now- now there was only you.

"yes"

That single word sounded better than any song you'd ever heard.

yes

Your lips were on his before he could even think of changing his mind- and god did they feel like a dream.

His soft stubble grazed against your cheeks and upper lip, as you deepened the kiss, as he opened up to you, closing his eyes only after he'd taken you in, only after he could admire all that was happening to him for some godforsaken reason.

A growl rumbled from his chest when your core found his dick again, grinding onto it in a way, that combined with the way your tongue was tasting every inch of him, was making him see stars.

He didn't think he'd kissed like this in 30 years,

making out seemed like such a distant thing from him, he was much too old to do something like this, and yet... everything about you made him feel like a teenager all over again, so perhaps it was fitting-

and god he had forgotten how amazing it felt.

You started undoing his flannen, not even dreaming of breaking the kiss, and once you opened his shirt up, once his big strong chest was right there before you, you just had to look at it.

You leaned away, his lips chasing yours making you smile as your gaze lowered.

Jesus, he was the hottest man you'd ever seen.

Some hair and freckles adorned his pecs, his little belly was ever so cutely fighting against his jeans- his skin was soft beneath your palms as they explored every inch they could reach.

He was looking at you, watching your blow-out eyes, wondering what potion you'd drank to be this mesmerized by what he had to offer.

You smiled once you caught him, leaning closer to leave a quick kiss on his lips.

"take off your clothes"

You got off of him, and once he saw you get rid of your shirt, your boobs pushed together by a simple black bra that somehow, at the moment, seemed like the sexiest thing in the world, he rushed to follow suit, nearly tripping getting off his pants.

The moment he looked at you again, the world- the universe, it all went quiet.

You stood naked before him, a soft, perfect little thing, looking like a damn dream.

"babygirl" he could only breathe as you reached him again.

"What?" you laughed

"I-I don't even know"

You shook your head, grinning from ear to ear as he pressed his mouth on yours again.

He was already addicted.

In a haze, you found yourself on the bed, your body caged beneath his, his tongue fighting with yours, his hands all over- You almost had the urge to laugh at how desperate he seemed, how frantically he was touching every inch of you, exploring every piece of skin-

His hands were on your tits, fingers gently playing with your nipples, then on your belly, your waist, your ass, your thighs, until finally, he found your core, but before he had the time to fully reach it you'd switched up with him, straddling his lap as he laid flat on his back... only he couldn't keep away for even a second and he immediately sat up, grabbing your waist.

He couldn't even begin to complain that you'd already grabbed his cock, positioning it at your entrance.

You couldn't wait anymore- you needed him now.

"Wait-" he murmured, his breathing labored already "you sure you're... y'know ready?"

Oh my god, you swore you were gonna fall for him if he kept this shit up.

"Joel" you smiled, looking into his big brown eyes "I've been wet since you fixed the cabinet"

"I-" he blushed "You-you sure?"

You didn't answer him, you simply took one of his hands in yours and guided him to feel just how much you were telling the truth.

"Fuck"

"yeah" you smirked "that's just what you do to me, Mr. Miller"

Jesus fuck

Joel didn't think his cock had ever been so hard.

You didn't give him time to do or say anything- he'd gathered that's how you did things by now- as you slowly, oh so very slowly, started sinking onto him.

He was big, the kind of big you'd be feeling tomorrow morning. The stretch hurt just right, so overwhelmed by the unadulterated pleasure that it was barely there.

Soft little moaned gasps spilled from your lips with every inch added, your eyes were closed, only focusing on the extraordinary feeling as your nails clawed at Joel's chest.

Until, finally- you'd done it. You were fully sat on his cock, and while your eyelids fluttered open, you regained your ability to hear- to hear the curses leaving Joel's mouth between ragged breaths

"Jesus Christ- Jesus fucking Christ- Goddamnit"

His grip on your waist was so tight you were sure it was gonna leave a bruise... not that you were complaining.

"you ok?"

His eyes were shut close and creases of effort filled his forehead, while his chest went up and down as he desperately tried to breathe.

"Joel?"

He swallowed tightly, now breathing in through his nose before exhaling from his mouth.

"d-don't move"

You smiled as you promised "I won't"

God this was fucking embarrassing.

He'd spent three days training.

And yes he wasn't sure he would have said yes, but still, better safe than sorry- except for the fact it clearly hadn't worked.

He had spent three days fucking his own fist and trying to last as much as possible and he did do progress... but this... this was fucking nothing like what he'd felt in the last twenty years.

He was so fucked

"I-I'm sorry" he gritted out, sounding almost defeated "I- I haven't done this in a long time darlin'"

"And you... you feel so fuckin' good- fuck"

Your walls had inadvertently squeezed around him at his words, making a groan rumble in his chest.

"You have nothing to apologize for Joel"

he would have told you that your voice was making everything worse if he weren't so preoccupied with trying to calm his dick down.

"take all the time you need"

And so he did, his eyes remained closed as he breathed through the initial shock, until finally, after what felt like an eternity, he was back.

He had to stifle a moan once he opened his eyes back up.

There you were, your beautiful eyes trained on his with such gentleness and care that it made where his gaze fell to feel even more sinful.

Your boobs were barely touching his chest, and yet they could have been in his face for the effect they had on him- his hands were on your waist, holding onto your soft flesh, your thighs were straddling his lap, giving him no choice but to finally look between your bodies, where you two connected.

"Darlin'" he murmured, hypnotized

You smiled, watching him admiring you in silence

"You look..."

Every word that came to mind wasn't enough, you were otherwordly, you were perfection... so he just settled on the simplest, and perhaps truest of them all.

"you're beautiful"

Your cheeks burned with heat as his gaze came back to yours.

"so are you, Joel"

And that was that.

His lips found yours again, and you couldn't stop your hips as they started moving, rocking back and forth and bringing little waves of ecstasy to your core.

A desperate moan spilled from yours to Joel's mouth as he grabbed the back of your head, forcing you into an even deeper kiss as he started following your movements.

Your hands went to the back of his neck, grabbing at the hair at the nape of it as you finally started bouncing on his dick, and god- god it was even better than you could have ever imagined

The loudest growl sounded from his throat as you worked yourself up and down on his shaft.

He was in another universe, his actions were only reflexes as the hand not tangled in your hair found your tits and then your ass, grabbing at it with tenderness and need.

"Oh Joel" you cried, his dick filling you up better than anything ever before.

You could quite literally feel him in your stomach, every little vein and ridge of skin creating a permanent dent inside of you that only he was ever gonna be able to fill.

"sweetheart- fuck" he groaned on his own, your breaths mixing as you ghosted each other's mouths, his eyes raking over your body and face, while yours couldn't help but roll to the back of your head as his manhood hit a particularly good spot.

"You feel so- good Joel" you whimpered mindlessly, now quickening your pace, desperation taking over you completely.

the sound of him entering your drenched core mixed with the bed creaking underneath you as you drove yourself closer and closer to heaven.

The sound of his name falling from your lips was something that filled Joel's chest with an indescribable feeling, he felt on top of the word, and at the same time... at the same time he wished it had never left your mouth because it was now forever imprinted in his brain, and he knew nothing was ever gonna compare to it.

Oh and also- also it was making his little lasting problem real fucking hard to control.

But he was nothing if not a gentleman,

You were gonna come, he wasn't gonna have it any other way.

His hand lowered down your belly as you kept chasing your release, looking like a damn glimpse of paradise, until his thumb found your clit.

"Oh fuck" you moaned, your eyes snapping open to look at him- a dark glaze of lust shading your iris.

Joel realized too late that he hadn't taken into account how fucking tight you'd get, and was now really paying the consequences.

Plus when you looked at him like that... maybe just this one time he could not be a gentleman- I mean it's not like he had much choice, he was trying his hardest but- shit

"darlin'" he mumbled, his thumb circling your bud "w-where do ya- where do ya want it?"

You moaned louder just at the thought of him coming

"Inside"

It wasn't even a question

"N-no sweetheart I-I shouldn-"

"Joel" you interrupted him, your lips grazing his as you talked, your grip on his hair tightening "I want you to fill me up until I can feel you leaking out of me for days"

Good Christ and heaven

"Fuck me" he cursed, all his strength going on not coming right there and then "Darlin' please- tell me you're close"

You were already seeing stars as he spoke

"I'm close, baby- oh fuck" you cried "Joel!"

A tsunami of lust-filled pleasure coursed through your veins as your orgasm hit like a damn truck.

You couldn't even remember your name as you screamed his own into the thick air, as you moaned and cried and spasmed around him, feeling him do exactly what you'd asked- filling you up to the very brim.

He'd started coming the moment you did- he couldn't do anything about it, it was just unadulterated perfection-

His head fell between your neck and shoulders as groaned like a man possessed,

until finally, after a good three minutes, you were both back to the land of the living.

He looked twenty years younger when he looked at you again, and you- you looked like the most beautiful woman on earth.

A soft smile pulled at your lips, and you couldn't help but ask "How long before we can do it again?"

And fuck him, but his age didn't matter, with those eyes of yours, it might very well be minutes.

@kluvspedro @bluebiyou @casssiopeia @bean-is-reading @millerispunk @i-cant-stfu

[reshinless]

Can you write kinich x reader smut

──── i w'na ride?!

𝜗𝜚 synopsis. whatever position he wants >_o

𝜗𝜚 pairings. kinich x gn!afab!reader(?) see this however u want cuz in som of the bullets i use boobs or discreetly mention chests (kinich is also a lowk perv)

𝜗𝜚 director's notice. i'll explain why he'd like this trust me, !!nsfw content ahead!!

inspired by the moments where he kept hitting the pose where his hands behind his head plus the one scene where he sat in a tree with his hands behind his back (or maybe i'm imagining things.)

kinich who reluctantly visits the beach(es) plus hot springs in the toyac springs region because mualani says you both need it, seeing as how much you both work beside each other, you'll definitely need a nice bath! especially the rumors of the heated conditions the springs seem to excrete.

kinich who no matter how long you and him have met each other, he'll never get used to seeing you in a bathing suit. even when you both were still kids fooling around on the beach with mualani. the atmosphere back then has almost never changed, walking along the sandy coast, feeling each little particle fall over your toes, the sun roughly about to set, the scenery was a sight to behold!

now that you both were older.. he would be lying if he said he wasn't attracted to you, your way of fighting, your appearance, how well you compliment him, it was almost like a corrupt addiction. even ajaw mentions how cheesy it is each time he sees kinich looking at you, whether it be lust or love in his green eyes.

mualani was overjoyed to hear that you've never gone out to swim, especially in the temperature she's usually in. kinich decides to tag along, totally not because he definitely wouldn't mind seeing you in different swimsuits/trunks.

kinich who you didn't mind letting him stay outside the changing room while you put on different suits while mualani actually help you choose (unlike someone who just kept ogling his eyes at you)

mualani who chose something that revealed more than appropriate portion of your skin (which was a lot, and imagine this similar to the one lumine wore!!), kinich who couldn't stop eyeing you up and down, ajaw teasing with digital sunglasses over his face; "y'know sunglasses help cover up what you're tryna look at!"

cue kinich smacking bro away again :pray:

you only got more attractive in his eyes. watching how you walk up to him, holding out a bottle of sunscreen to him, asking if he'd put some on your back before you'd go surfing on mualani's shark.

kinich didn't wanna admit but he was a little more than just turned on while spreading the lotion over your shoulders and back down to your back, his calloused hands feeling you up and down..

kinich who felt a little guilty but couldn't help but always slowly let his view dip down to your ass. shit he could already imagine what it'd look like without that last piece of clothing. too bad he can't rip it off you right here and now.

kinich who ran his hands around your chest, your sides, every curve that you wouldn't suspect him from.. he could already feel the tent in his pants rise.

kinich who couldn't resist looking at your pretty body through the blurriness of the water, almost forgetting to swim back up from being a little more than distracted. only coming back up after mualani mentions he's the winner of holding their breath underwater challenge.

a sigh of relief.. or maybe pleasure rather remembering yesterday on how close he got to be to you, palming his erection with hurriedness, thinking of how soft you felt under his fingers, only a thin layer of sunscreen that wouldn't make it weird between you both, kinich catches himself moan your name quietly in the changing room before he goes back out to you and mualani for day two of your summer break of 5 days in total.

sitting under the comfortable shade of an umbrella he brought, putting sunglasses on to rest for a bit before going in the water, or at least that is what it looks like. in all real reality, he was taking sneaky glances at you from less than appropriate angles, he would be lying if he said he didn't enjoy it.

kinich could barely hold himself back for the next 2 days, wherein you all toured around mualani's hometown (for the sixtieth time, but then again it never gets old seeing a different culture every now and then!)

on the last day of your adventures with mualani, she offers for you both to finally bask in the warmth of the hot springs! the natural wonder of her home! kinich was reluctant at first, but agreed seeing how you were just oh-so happy to oblige.

this time, mualani got you a different swimsuit, one muuuuuchhh more revealing this time. it's clear now that she knows kinich's little crush on you, and now she knew that you liked him back.

mualani who coincidentally forgot the milk, and silly snacks she baked earlier that morning, oh would you look at the time! i guess she has to go get them... kinich who lowkey panicks, he already is a little flustered from your new look (but manages to quickly cool himself down)

kinich who is gentle while letting you slowly dip your feet into the water, this wasn't his first time here but he knew it was yours, stepping into the water first while holding your palms softly.

you two finally both sit in the springs comfortably, right in front of him, talking about whatever you and mualani did while he sunbathed (under an umbrella). building sandcastles and such.

"ahhh... kinichhhh! you should've been there. i would've wanted you there at least, dunno about mualani-" it felt like almost immediately his trunks tightened.. maybe he got the wrong size?

oh but the sound of you verbally saying you needed him definitely is a huge turn on. well you didn't necessarily say 'need' but you definitely wanted him there, good enough.

kinich who already has you straddled on top of him, directly on his boner, fuck he could feel it already. his hands are already on your hips letting you grind over his erection, this felt better than he could've ever fantasized of!

kinich who lets you ride him, the water you both were already surrounded only made it sound all the more dirtier. it didn't help that the sly little smile on your face, all he could do was bury his face into an arm of his own, looking away from you.

kinich whose hands were in his hair, intertwining with every little strand, the flush on his face only worsened each time you bounced on it, he could barely make eye contact with you, not because he didn't want you.. ohh it was because he thinks if he did he'd come immediately!!

kinich who holds you close as his climax comes closer as well, holding you tight in his embrace, he could feel your warmth, your skin, your everything, all he could was quickly drift his calloused palms back down to your hips, making sure no drop of cum was waaaasssttteeedddd

you could see how good you made him feel, even with just a sneaky, yet lustful glance, yet plop plop plop is all you can hear echoing throughout the cave, your hands propped up on the wall as kinich pushed against your back, his grunts only getting louder, eager to please you. seeing how your eyebrows knotted

kinich who felt intoxicated as hell in your scent, almost breathless as his head fits into the empty slot right beside your collar, fire pooled down inside your abdomen as you slowly reached your peak, watching how beautifully your eyes rolled back, feeling warm semen shoot up in your stomach. holy shit were you a beauty to see.

the musky scent of sweat mixed with the warm water below you both, kinich could still feel you clench harshly on his cock, even after release, fixed & still processing what you both had just done.

kinich who brings you out the bath, wrapped in a towel, bridal style and all, before mualani can come back with the milk and snacks- "hey what is that white stuff mixed in the water- what did you two do?!"

kinich who holds your hand while you both stroll throughout the shops opened up at nighttime, the constellations in the sky connected like it was used to it, the fresh scent of grilled fish was clear in the air's aroma, filling everyone's noses, mualani couldn't just give all this fish just to you two anyway!

kinich who fully confessed his feelings to you, no sex no lust, just him wanting you to sense how much he's been longing for you, in hopes you'd reciprocate it. in which you did with open arms!

m: "aha! i knew it! you both finally told each other you like each other didn't you!!", k: "no need to shout.", y/n: "i suppose!"

mualani will stop teasing for now, and let you two be, just with each other as the stars reflect off the light you've shone into his life.

kinda cringe might delete :100:

[zentraex]

Summary: You made a lot mistakes in your new job, but do you regret them? Nope, not a bit. But who can blame you for it? If you wouldn't have done them, you never would have met this pretty boy.

Remember: German Grammar is a lot different then English grammar. I apologize for any mistakes.

Pairing: Francis Mosses (doppelganger) x gn! Reader

(A/N): I usually write for mha, but this men dominates my fyp on TikTok and I can't stop grinning like an idiot about all this fanarts. My men is just too attractive for his own good. Nevertheless, Tumblr has too few fanfictions for him, so I had to do it myself. Still, I am not that proud about how it turned out. It certainly sounded better in my head, but I don't care. One shitty fanficion is better than none.

Art by @asteriscks on TikTok

This game is not mine, but Ignacio Alvarado. I also used phrases from the game.

Mistakes? Yes, but no regrets.

It's been a week since you started working for D.D.D as a doorman. 

You can remember your first day so well, it could have been yesterday. 

Well... probably because your life is constantly at stake. 

_

It started with a mistake that you ended up here. It was completely unexpected since you always made sure, that you sent your rent to the right account. 

Surely no one can blame you for a small typo, right?

Well, your landlord, who kept pounding on your door until you woke up, surely did.

"What?" you asked, annoyed, as you opened the door.

"When do you plan to finally pay your bill? The date has already been overdue for two weeks!" he complains. 

What?

"Sorry, but I've already transferred my money to you."

"Well, I didn't get anything. Do you still have the receipt for the transfer?"

"No..."

You already knew what that meant: double payment.

"Look, today, I'll transfer it to your account again, okay? If it doesn't work this time, it's not my fault."

You were about to close the door, but your landlord had other plans when he held the door open with his foot.

 "No no no. You will give me the money now. I don’t trust you. Why would you transfer it to me today, when it should have happened two weeks ago. You will give it to me now."

Your eyes widened. 

Now?

"But I don't have that much money in my hand? Who's got that?"

"Then I'll have to kick you out for now. But don't worry, no one is going to buy an apartment here anytime soon, so you can move right back in as soon as you give me the money."

Staring stunned at his smiling face you could have sworn you were about to hit him. 

"The keys?" 

With watery eyes, you grabbed your keys, placed them in his outstretched hand, and frowned.

What kind of person had such sharp fingernails as he does?  

You were sure that he could definitely have stabbed someone with them.

Thank God, I didn't hit him. 

"When do you plan to give me the money? I've heard that all banks closed today. Some kind of holiday among them, I've heard."

What!?

How were you going to get through the day today? You intentionally left everything in your apartment since you were so sure that you could have given the money to your landlord in a matter of minutes. 

"You’re telling me this now!?"

"If you had paid, you wouldn’t need to know." 

That filthy bastard.

No matter how angry you were at that moment, your panic was overweighting.  

What were you going to do now? 

Shit.

"Man, I really wouldn't want to be in your situation...", the landlord murmured.

Fuck the nails- This guy deserves a punch.

Just as you raised your fist, he speaks again.

"But maybe we can agree on something.

Then you stopped. 

"The D.D.D., which is responsible for the safety of all residents in this area, is looking for doormans. Ours has recently...quitted, which is why we are urgently looking for one. They pay three times the amount of your rent in a week. If you take the job, I can overlook your sloppiness this time."

Three times your rent? In a week? And for what? To sit there and check a few documents. You'd be crazy not to take the offer! 

"Okay. I'll do it. Where can I apply?"

"Don't worry, I'll sort it out for you. Tomorrow, you can start”

_

Looking back, it should have been clear to you that something was wrong. Starting with the sudden his sudden threat, the fingernails and this stupid story about the holiday of the banks. 

Maybe it was just because you were too panicked at that moment to think rationally.

But let’s be true here: when are you thinking rationally? If you did, you would certainly have quitted after your first day.

_

"Welcome and congratulations on your new job."

After watching the short video, a man in the yellow suit came to your window. You are so shocked that you can’t even answer.

I'm going to die today!

After all, you know it yourself: you're too gullible for the job. There's no chance you'll unmask a doppelganger who copies someone well.

“As you could see on the introductory film, your job is to verify the entry of the neighbors of your building. Each day there will be a list of individuals who will request entry to the building. It is possible that there are individuals who request entry and aren’t on the list. In which case you will mark on the checklist that they are not on the list and proceed to question the individual. Also, you must verify that the ID and the entry reqest are correct and have the respective D.D.D. logo. Don’t forget to also check the expiration on the IDs. Remember it’s Febuary 1955."

Your gaze wanders to the note that was stuck to the wall. 

Arnold Schmicht F02 – 01

Anastacha Mikaelys F02 – 04

Robertsky Peachman F01 – 02

Steven Rudboys F03 – 03 

Mia Stone F03 – 01

Rafttellyn Cappuccin F03 – 04

Admittedly, you don't know any of your neighbors, neither by character nor really by sight. You were never the type to care about your neighbors. 

"I wish you good luck."

C’mon Reader, be like Henry…

But better.

The first inhabitant was Mia Stone and you already started to sweat.

"Good evening."

Was she real? Was she a doppelganger? 

With shaky hands, you reached for her ID and entry pass, only to find that everything was fine. She was also on today's list and her appearance doesn't show any deviations either, right?

Just to be sure, you looked into the folder that described her appearance: 

Long hair

Small round nose

She has freckles

...

...

...

Freckles?

Your eyes wandered again to the woman in front of you, who was waiting patiently behind the window. 

You narrowed your eyes a little and leaned forward to get a better view of her.

No matter how long you stared at her, you didn't see them, her freckles. 

"You look different...", you murmur after a while.

"What's wrong with my appearance? I think everything is fine with my appearance."

Her photo on her ID and Entry Pass both have no freckles. 

Perhaps a mistake on the part of the D.D.D.? 

You're about to press the green button, but then you see her grinning slightly out of the corner of your eye. 

Shit. 

She almost had you. You're really not made for this job.

Your hand slammed hard against the red button, causing the siren to blare and the metal window to crash down. 

"3312," you murmur to yourself.

"You have contacted the D.D.D.. A group of agents has been sent to your building. Please wait for the cleaning protocol to run."

Cleaning protocol? 

What happens to those who were cleaned? They certainly won't be killed, will they? 

What if they will?

What if your judgment was wrong?

What if...

Your thoughts were interrupted as the siren fell silent and the metal window went up, only to reveal the yellow man.

"Cleaning protocol completed. You can continue your job."

It took a while until someone finally came again. 

This time, your heart was pounding faster. Significantly faster. And this time, you can't even say for sure that it's all out of fear. 

Milkman...

You definitely can't deny it: he's probably one of the most attractive men you've ever seen. 

You don't even have to look at today's checklist to tell he's not on it – a face like his would have caught your eye right away. 

"Francis Mosses, huh?" you murmured to yourself as you looked at his ID. "You're not on today's list."

"I’m not on today’s list because I had to leave due to an emergency."

Long nose

Thin chin

Tired eyes

Short hair

Wears a hat

It all fit. The only thing left now was a call. 

Just as you began to spin the wheel of the phone, he said, "You're new here, aren't you? I've never seen you here before."

"Yes, today is my first day."

"Must be hard, huh? I've heard that more and more doppelgangers are appearing and they are becoming more and more error-free. It would be a shame if such a pretty face as yours were to disappear forever."

Your cheeks turn red and suddenly you feel shyer than you actually are.

"B-But your job has to be hard as well. I didn't think that being a milkman would rob you so much sleep."

Francis smiles a little. So little that you almost didn't see it at all.

"It's not. I just stay up for a very long time. If you like, I can bring you some milk sometime. It's refreshing, calms the nerves."

You bite your lip slightly when you have to refrain from a question.

What milk do you mean exactly?

My God, why were you just such a sucker for handsome men?

"I'd be delighted, Francis."

You talked to him for a while and you quickly forgot that you were actually going to call someone. 

"I'd like to talk to you more, but I don't want to stop you from your work. I'll see you tomorrow, right, Reader?"

And you quickly forgot that you never told him your name. 

You pressed the green button.

_

"Shh," whispered the voice of Francis next to your ear. 

It was your third day, your third time to change shift.

Well, it usually would have been.

Your vision and mouth were blocked by the bloody hands of the doppelganger who claimed to be Francis.

He had killed the doorman, that should have taken over your shift.

You had to admit, that you were more than inconsiderate. After all, you didn't ask for his entry pass, nor the reason why he wasn't on today's list.  

"I'll let you go now, yeah? No wrong move, okay?"

He laughed softly as he released his hands from you and turned your chair, so you were facing him. 

"We don't want to hurt you, do we, Reader?"

The sentence shouldn't have given you hope, because after all, you were more than sure that you were going to die one way or another.

Maybe you should have shown a little resistance. For your honor, but....

Oh?

He is so close to you that you can practically feel his body heat. Or was it your own? Your face, despite your situation, was burning. 

Even though he said he was letting you go, his hands ran over your body and you couldn't deny that it did something to you. 

Were you so shameful?

"Actually, I wanted to wait, but I couldn't take it anymore.  I've been patient long enough, haven't I? It was so much work for me, to let you get this job."

You didn't know what to say. Honestly, you didn't know if you would even be able to answer him. 

His breath touched your throat as he spoke, "I think I deserve this, don't I? What do you say, Reader? Do I deserve my reward?”

If you were going to die anyway, why not enjoy the last few minutes?

Regardless of whether he was a doppelganger, he had lived up to his title as "Mlikman" that night.

_

"You killed the real Francis Mosses?" you asked the next day. 

Francis grins, almost so much so that his real form was threatening to show itself.

"Yes, of course. What would have happened if he had come before me? You would have sent the D.D.D. after me."

Well, he had a point, huh?

No matter how wrong it was, you were glad it didn't come to that. 

You didn't know the real Francis Mosses. That's probably why his death was so insignificant to you.

"Have you killed more people?"

"Just more doppelgangers you let through."

Your eyes widened. 

You were so sure you caught them all. The false success was the reason why you didn't quit…well, it was one of the reasons.

"How many have I let through?"

Francis just continues to wear his smirk as he gives you a kiss on the forehead.

"Don't rack your pretty head over it, okay?"

You just nod, smiling.

"Are you going to kill others...?

You don't know why you added your next question. Probably because you wanted to feel special. 

"Would you kill for me?"

"Hooooonn"

When you turn your gaze to his face, two white pupils stared at you and his grin is inhumanly wide and black. 

You don't know if it's joyful or sadistic, but it definitely made you feel special.

_

Looking back, you made more than a few mistakes. 

But honestly? 

You don't regret a single one of them. After all, all of them have led to an all-too-familiar knock on your window.

When you look up, he waves, the milkman. 

[frenchkisstheabyss]

♡ Wondering ♡

♡ Pairings: frat boy!mingi x chubby!fem!librarian!reader

♡ Genre: angst/fluff/smut

♡ Summary: While working your job at the campus library you find that the most popular guy on campus has developed quite the crush on you. Thinking that it's some sort of prank, you dismiss him completely but Mingi has his heart set on making you his and isn't content to give up that easily.

♡ Word Count: 4.5k-ish

♡ Warnings: mingi really develops a thing for chubby girls, reader has body insecurities, body worship, kissing, male masturbation, porn, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, a lil hair pulling, a lil rough sex for a sec, technically cum marking, pet names (baby), but otherwise fluffy

♡ A/N: This is a fic I wrote for a super adorable anon and as always I'm super honored that you even asked me to write this my love. I truly hope that I did your idea some justice and you enjoy it. To all the chubby babes out there who may read this, you're a bad bitch, I swear to you, and if anyone tells you otherwise I'll swing on em. Kay, love you, bye - xoxo

Nothing. Mingi strokes his cock—his palm gliding up and down his length, his thumb circling the rim—and he feels absolutely nothing. Lying in the darkness of his bedroom, the warm glow of light emanating from his phone illuminates the frustration on his face. His gaze lazily dances across the screen where a woman lies naked, a sex toy vibrating between her thighs. She’s in his favorite position, making his favorite noises, but he can’t get off on it.

Giving up, he lets out a groan, throwing his head back on his pillow. It’s been weeks of this. He’s been too horny to function but when the time of action comes he can only get halfway hard and nothing feels the same as it used to. Maybe a different video will help. Bringing his phone in close to his face, he scrolls through the recommended videos. His cock still in his hand, he feels it soften into a sad, floppy thing the further down he scrolls.

Just as he’s about to call it a night, prepared to at last put himself out of his misery, something catches his eye. An image of a naked woman spread across a bed, her plush body fully exposed. She’s bigger than other girls he’s seen naked in porn, even in real life. She’s chubby and soft with shimmering gloss on her lips and stretch marks on her thighs. His breath hitches at the sensation of the blood rushing down his length as he takes her in.

His interest officially piqued, he clicks into the video and watches her in action. He’s hypnotized by the way she bounces and jiggles, every motion of her body too perfect to comprehend. The skin pulls tight around his cock, beads of arousal rolling down the tip as he quickens his movements. His bottom lip catches between his teeth, an attempt at choking back the low groans fighting their way up his throat at the sight of juices moistening the woman’s soft thighs.

Seeing her hits him with a rush of something unfamiliar. Something that has his stomach muscles contracting and his mouth watering. His mind goes wild with thoughts of what it’d be like to touch her, to feel her body trembling against his. What he wouldn’t give right now to grip a belly like that or drag his tongue across the plush of her ass. It’s exhilarating, unlike anything he’s ever felt before. His cock grows so sensitive that he’s twitching with every stroke. 

Any care for if his roommates can hear him flies out of the window as a dizzying heat washes over him, the veins along his length throbbing as a waterfall of white shoots up onto his stomach. His phone drops onto the bed and he lets out a pitiful whimper, his eyes clung shut as he gives in to an orgasm so strong it makes his muscles weak. He’s so high from it that he fears he’ll never come down. Breathless, his skin covered in a thin sheen of sweat, he sits up in bed and flicks the light on to see what a mess he’s made of himself.

His eyes drift back to his phone where a suggestion for a similar video calls him. He takes a deep breath, feeling his cock stiffening again so soon. Mingi picks his phone up, his thumb hovering over the Next button. It’s 3am and in a few hours Yunho will be banging on his door to go to football practice. He should get his shit together, clean himself off, and go to sleep. But that rush was so unexpected, so utterly delicious. He slips back down into bed, hitting the Next button. He needs more.

“Whoa, there’s so many books here” Mingi gasps, staring up at the tall cherry wood shelves of the sprawling library. 

Mingi’s seen this place in pictures before—this marble palace with its sky high shelves and expertly crafted pillars—but in all his years on campus he’s never stepped foot in it. Nothing in this literary maze ever interested him enough to require a visit. His college career has always depended more on athletics and frat politics than it has books.

Most of his professors were more than content to give him a passing grade simply because of who he is. A stroke of luck that ran out the moment a new Women’s Studies professor stepped foot on campus. She’s set out to challenge him, to make him work for his grades if he actually wants them. A true tragedy if he’s ever been faced with one. 

“Duh, it’s full of books. It’s literally a library” Yunho laughs, plopping a small stack of books into Mingi’s arms. “I grabbed everything you need except one. The Vagina Monologues. You’re gonna have to go ask one of the librarians for help.” 

Mingi winces at the thought of the title leaving his lips and falling on a complete stranger’s ears, “Why’d it have to be called that?”

“Oh, stop being a child” Yunho huffs, catching a glimpse of a young woman pushing a cart of books past the aisle. “There! Go ask her!”

Mingi hesitates a moment but Yunho shoves him forward, “Off you go.” 

Stumbling his way down the aisle, Mingi traces the sound of squeaky cart wheels a few rows over, stopping dead in his tracks when his gaze finds the woman pushing it. She wears a flowy, pear colored dress with white lilies printed all over it. It’s long enough not to scandalize the other library staff but short enough to get a glimpse of where her thighs begin to kiss. From behind Mingi can clearly make out her shape in it, the plushness of her figure bringing to mind things he definitely shouldn’t be thinking about in the library. 

Humming along to a song in her head, she turns to place a book on one of the shelves and Mingi’s cheeks begin to burn. She’s the prettiest girl he’s ever seen. He’s said that about a lot of girls and never meant it but with this one it’s different. She has eyes that twinkle like sunshine dancing on the surface of some gorgeous lake. The curve of her nose is nothing short of perfection and her lips look like they taste of the sweetest sugar. 

“Can I help you with something?” you ask. The way he stares at you makes you feel more like an animal in some zoo than the object of his affection.

Mingi shakes himself out of his daze, lowering the stack of books down to cover the slight rise in his jeans. “Uh…I…yeah…um” he stutters. 

“Uh, I, yeah, um?” you tease, grabbing another book and sliding it onto a nearby shelf, “I don’t think we have that one.” 

“Who are you?” he spits out as if that’s a completely normal question to ask someone when you’re the one who approached them. 

“That’s a really weird question to ask someone, Mingi.”

“Wait, you know me?”

You giggle at the absurdity of such a question, “Of course I know you. Everyone knows you.” 

Mingi thinks about it for a second, the reality of his popularity setting back in. “I guess you’re right. I am pretty popular.”

The grin on his face makes you nauseous. Of course you know him. And of course he doesn’t know who you are. Mingi’s from a whole different world and you’re positive girls like you don’t exist where he comes from. Rolling your eyes, you grab back onto the handle of your cart, “If there’s nothing you need…” 

“Vagina!” he says, leaving you both stunned to the core, “I mean, monologues. Vagina Monologues. It’s, like, a book or whatever. Fuck it, are you busy tonight?” 

A whisper of laughter drifts down the aisle, giving away Yunho’s presence. He’s never seen his best friend crash and burn this hard. Keeping a straight face isn’t an option. Yunho’s laughter may not be meant for you but it feels like it is. The first time a guy like Mingi talks to you and of course it had to be a joke. 

“Second floor, in the Plays section, under E for Ensler” you snap, turning your back before you die of embarrassment right before Mingi’s eyes. 

“Wait, can I at least get your name?” Mingi calls out but you’re already pushing your cart down the aisle, disappearing around the next corner without another word. 

Yunho slaps a hand on Mingi’s shoulder, shaking his head in disappointment, “Who’s your new friend?”

Mingi sighs longingly, his gaze still lingering where you once stood, “I don’t know but I plan to find out.” 

Sometimes when you find yourself working nights at the library you feel like Cinderella. A slave to these old dusty books, forced to clean and organize them until your manicure begins to chip while other girls are out at bars or parties. Only there’s no fairy godmother to come wave her magic wand and turn your pumpkin into a carriage. There’s no glass slipper and certainly no Prince Charming to sweep you off your feet.

Still, you need the extra money so there’s nothing to be done about it. Taking a seat at the front desk you check the time, it’s almost time to close up shop and the last few stragglers are packing up their things to head out. Once they’re gone things should be peaceful. No questions, no interruptions, no one getting on your nerves. 

“Have you been avoiding me?” Mingi asks, popping up in front of your desk. 

“Oh my god!” you gasp, clutching your chest, “Are you trying to kill me?”

“Kill you? How could I ever hurt a girl as pretty as you?” he says in that cocky tone you’ve become accustomed to. 

It’s been weeks since your first run in with Mingi and he’s been relentless ever since. He stops by every shift to ask you some silly question that somehow always turns into yet another attempt at flirting with you. You shoot him down every single time but he never seems offended or discouraged. He just keeps coming back all bright eyed and full of energy like a golden retriever. You’ve gone home every night wondering what his motivations are. Why’s he being so persistent? 

Sometimes for the hell of it you let yourself play with the idea that he might actually be attracted to you. Mingi is drop dead gorgeous after all and, even though you refuse to laugh at any of his stupid jokes, you find him pretty charming. For all his cockiness, he’s sweet in a way that makes you wonder what it might be like to be truly adored by a guy like him. This little fantasy of yours is always disrupted by the vision of Yunho laughing at the two of you. It’s a joke, that’s all, a stupid joke that Mingi’s cruel for not knowing when to give up on. 

“Aren’t you sick of coming here?” you ask, pretending to be busy on the laptop, “There must be something else you can entertain yourself with.”

Mingi smiles down at you, fawning over how your skin glows in the shreds of sunset that peek through the windows. “There is actually. I’m having a party tonight and I want you to come.”

Your eyes shoot open, an involuntary burst of joy hitting you. “A party?” you ask, sounding more excited than you intended to. Catching yourself, you reel back the excitement but it’s too late, Mingi’s already caught it. 

“Yeah, a party” he says, reaching behind the desk to grab a pen and a sticky note. He scribbles down the address and sticks it to your laptop screen. “Tell me you’ll come.”

He sounds so genuine when he says that. It’s almost as if he’s truly desperate to have you around. You look up at his face and feel the butterflies in your stomach go into a frenzy. You’ve heard the way other girls talk about him, the way they swoon over him like he’s this magical thing. You don’t want to be one of them, just another girl pining after Song Mingi but here you are. 

You clear your throat, snatching the blue sticky note from your screen, and putting it aside. “I don’t really know if I wanna spend my Friday night with a bunch of wasted pretty boys.”

“Ooh, so you do think I’m pretty” Mingi blushes, batting his eyelashes. 

You pick up a stapler, threatening to throw it at him, “Leave now and maybe, just maybe I’ll consider coming to your little party.”

Mingi throws his hands up, carefully backing away from the desk, “Fair enough. I’m wearing all black by the way. In case you wanted to, ya know, match or something.”

You wind your arm back, placing it in perfect formation to hit him in the head with the stapler. Mingi gets the message and scurries out of the door, leaning his head back in for a split second to whisper, “See you later, beautiful.” He winks at you and you groan but he’s gone now and there’s no one left to take your anger out on.

As the last few visitors trickle out you find yourself sitting in the silence of the library, that blue sticky note calling your name. You pick it up, swearing you’ll toss it in the trash but you only stare at it, reading the address over and over again. Some stupid frat party with a bunch of stupid boys at some frat house on the edge of campus. Why would you ever waste your time going to something like that? And who does he think he is insinuating that you’d even want to match with him? Anyway, you only have one good black dress and you’re sure it doesn’t even fit anymore. It isn’t even worth trying…is it?

“I’m telling you, this girl’s gorgeous and she’s super smart too. She knows everything about books and stuff, like, you can ask her anything and she just knows” Mingi rambles, grabbing another beer from the fridge. 

“Because it’s her job” Yunho teases, leaning against the kitchen counter. 

Mingi pops the beer open, flicking the metal top into a nearby trash can, “And how did she get that job? Because she’s smart.”

“You know, I don’t think I’ve seen him like this over a girl…ever” Jongho says, stealing Mingi’s beer for himself.

“Well I think it’s cute. Mingi’s got a girlfriend” Wooyoung sings, making cute little hearts with his fingers.

“She’d be his girlfriend if she didn’t hate his guts” Yunho mumbles half heartedly. 

Mingi gasps, taking offense to that, “She doesn’t hate me, she just hasn’t fully warmed up to me yet but she will.”

He looks around the kitchen and his friends all eye him skeptically. Mingi didn’t say that with nearly enough confidence for them to believe him and the truth is that he barely believes himself but how does he tell his friends that? He’s the one who girls drool over. He’s never the one doing the drooling. He has a reputation at stake and here he is ruining it for a girl who probably won’t even show up tonight. But he can’t bring himself to give up on you yet. 

That first night after he met you he couldn’t get you out of his head. He kept imagining that face, that body, under him, on top of him, next to him. Just the thought of you made him hard enough that touching himself was mandatory to ease his need for you. And the more he showed up to bug you the more fascinating he came to find you.

Yes, you were snippy but never enough to directly chase him away. You let him stick around long enough for glimmers of your true personality to show. You’d made the terrible mistake of showing him how sweet you could be, how funny of a girl you are, and it only made things worse for both of you. More than having sex with you he wants to kiss you and hold your hand. He wants to tell you how pretty you are and not have you threaten him with a blunt object for it. 

“Not to be that guy but when did you start liking…ya know?” Jongho says, hoping that the others will know what he means without it coming off rude.

“Chubby girls?” Wooyoung asks, making Yunho almost choke on his beer. 

“You can’t just say that” Yunho coughs, grabbing a paper towel to wipe the beer from his lips. 

Mingi’s eyes narrow, the question not quite setting right with him, “What does it matter?” 

“I mean, it…it doesn’t. I swear it doesn’t” Jongho stammers, looking anywhere but at Mingi. 

Wooyoung shrugs, coming to Jongho’s rescue, “In his defense, we’ve never seen you with one. She’s not your usual type.”

“So, what? Just cause she’s not my ‘type’ it has to be weird?” Mingi presses. 

No one says anything, not a solitary word. They only stare at the doorway, their faces drained of any color. In the next room a party rages, in the kitchen an argument is ready to erupt, and there you stand in between the two hearing something you shouldn’t have at a time you shouldn’t have heard it. 

“Hmm, well, thank you for that. I’m so happy everyone knows what I already did” you say, laughing to avoid tears, “Thank you for the invite, Mingi. Really.” 

Something’s said, you’re sure it’s by Mingi, but you can’t hear it. You’ve gone numb to everything. Even the music blaring from the speakers a few feet from you feels like it’s playing from miles away. Desperate to outrun the tears stinging the corners of your eyes, you rush through the crowd of partiers in the living room and make your way outside.

The autumn air blows against your cheeks, cooling your tears as they begin to escape. You wipe them away, doing your best to look normal as you pass people headed into the party, but you can’t seem to stop them from falling. You feel so stupid for ever believing that Mingi’s feelings for you were anything but a joke he could laugh about with his friends. His words ring in your ears as you approach your car, frantically digging through your purse for your keys. Not his type? Well he isn’t yours either. You’ve never been too fond of assholes anyway. 

“Shit” you hiss, the keys in your hand tumbling from your grasp the second you pull them out. You bend down to pick them up but someone snatches them away before you can. You spin around to find Mingi standing there, your keys jingling away as they twirl around his fingers. 

“Give them back” you demand, grabbing for your keys but he holds them up high just out of your reach. 

“You’re crying” he says and you can almost see his heart shatter, “Come back inside.”

“Why? So you and your friends can make fun of me to my face this time?” you ask, still fighting for your keys back but to no avail. 

Mingi frowns, “Make fun of you? We weren’t making fun of you. I’d never let anyone do that to you.” 

“So, what? Just cause she’s not my type it has to be weird?” you mock, feeling childish but justified considering the circumstances. 

“I didn’t mean it like that. I only meant that just because I’ve dated smaller girls that doesn’t mean I can’t like you and I do. I really, really like you” he swears, “I love your body. I think it’s beautiful. Everything about you…I’m just obsessed with and all I wanna do is show you how special you are but you won’t let me and I don’t understand why.”

Folding your arms across your chest, you stand on the sidewalk staring at Mingi like you hate him but it’s not him that you hate. It’s the fact that you believe him. The tears have slowed now but your cheeks are still wet, black streaks of mascara beginning to run down your face. You drop your head, embarrassed by your mini breakdown, and Mingi swoops in, giving you a chest to lay your head on. His long arms wrap around you, locking behind your back to keep you close. It’s your instinct to pull away but his embrace is too comforting and warm to abandon. 

“If you want me to leave you alone forever I promise I will. I’ll let you go and you’ll never have to see me again” he whispers, “But if you stay I promise I’ll be good to you.” 

Your stomach sinks at the thought of never seeing him again. Day after day all you’ve done is tell him to leave you alone but it never occurred to you how much it’d hurt if he actually did. “I don’t want you to leave me alone” you admit, your face emerging from the black abyss of his shirt, “That’s, like, the exact opposite of what I want you to do.”

Mingi cups your face, his thumb stroking the curve of your cheek, “Good because I wasn’t actually gonna leave you alone. How can I when you look like this? You’re even a pretty crier. How’s that possible?”

You’ve always managed not to blush when Mingi’s said things like this—at least not when he’s around—but you don’t stop yourself this time. You don’t even make the tiniest attempt at hiding how utterly giddy you are over his comments. 

“Ooh, is that a smile I see?” he gasps, immediately making you regret it. You motion to hit him in the arm but he grabs you by the wrist, slipping his hand into yours as he leads you back towards the house. “Let’s go upstairs and I’ll clean you up then we can talk more, okay?”

Mingi looks back at you and you could swear that time stands still. This isn’t where you thought you’d be on a Friday night, walking through a frat party hand in hand with one of the most popular guys on campus—with Mingi. He’s guiding you up the stairs, looking at you like you’re the prettiest girl in the world and for the first time, somewhere deep down inside, you’re beginning to feel like it. 

Before you left the house tonight you swore that you wouldn’t become some frat party cliche. Mingi’s hot, there’s no doubt about it, but there was no way you’d wind up bent over some bed with your panties around your ankles.

You were actually right about that. You’re not bent over some bed, you’re laying across it, and your panties aren’t around your ankles, they’re tossed off to the side of the bed, blending in with the pile of black clothing you collectively shed before you found every inch of Mingi’s cock stuffed inside of you. You came up here to talk, that was it, and in your defense you did talk. You were vulnerable with each other, you opened up about your feelings, and the next thing you knew your tongues were so far in each other’s mouths that you could feel it in your throats. 

Mingi’s kiss is sweeter than you imagined. It’s the kind of kiss you could get lost in it. Even now, after he’s been kissing your lips raw for the last half hour, you find yourself wanting more. You’re so wrapped up in him, so completely consumed by the ecstasy of having him inside of you, that you aren’t even focused on the fact that you’re naked. You can’t begin to care if you look good or not when your body’s flush with heat, feeling the best it has in your entire life.

But you do look good. Nothing in Mingi’s wildest dreams could compare to how beautiful your body actually is. His hands explore your curves, discovering those spots he knows will come to be his favorites. That squishy belly of yours that pokes out just a bit more when he massages your sides. Those pillowy thighs that seem even thicker when he presses them to your chest. Those breasts that bounce softly against his face while he’s sucking at your bud.

“You’re so fucking amazing, baby” Mingi whispers, licking his way over the hills of your breasts to bring his lips to yours. “I do have a type. You know it’s you, right?”

“Is that so?” you tease, trembling at every stroke of his cock between the slickness of your walls. You run your fingers through his hair, your back arching against the mattress so much that you’re sure you’d float away if the weight of Mingi’s body weren’t pinning you down.

Mingi kisses you like a starved man whose hunger can only be satisfied by the taste of you. “Mmm, can’t you tell?” he hums between sloppy kisses, “Can’t you feel it?” 

He snaps his hips into you and you let out a moan that makes you grateful for the loud music blaring downstairs. Keeping his lips locked to yours, one hand gripping your hip and the other cradling your face, he thrusts into you harder. Hard enough to make the bed creak. Hard enough to make your walls clench tighter. Hard enough to have you tugging his hair, moaning between his lips while your decadent juices drip down his length.

Mingi groans, holding you even tighter as the head of his cock rides the ridges of your sweet spot. Your insides are so spongy and wet, clenching around him just right. There’s no way he can go back to masturbating after this. The thought of you won’t be enough. Fantasies are absolutely nothing compared to what it’s like to truly feel you under him and around him. 

“Mingi, mmm, gonna cum” you whimper, your eyes wide and glossy as you look up at him. 

You sound so cute when you say it that he loses his sanity for a second, his hips stuttering before picking up the rhythm again. Mingi slips both hands behind your neck, deepening the kiss as he bottoms out completely. Heat pools behind your belly, spreading through your body until you’re sure flames are dancing at your fingertips. Your body tenses, a weak little moan falling from your lips before your vision goes blurry and your high washes over you. 

“That’s it, good girl” Mingi coos, basking in the warmth enveloping him, “So pretty when you cum all over my cock. Always so pretty.” 

Your walls are pulsing, fluttering wildly around his swollen cock. Your cum just pours down him, making every movement slippery wet. He can’t take it anymore. He couldn’t hold back even if he tried. 

“Aah, fuck” he hisses, pulling out of you just in time to paint your inner thighs in white, leaving ropes of cum dripping dangerously close to your core. 

Completely destroyed by your orgasm, you’re plastered to the bed and can only watch as Mingi catches his breath, immediately going to work planting kisses all over your body. He kisses the places you love and the places you hate. He worships them all with his lips because to him they’re perfect in every way.

You surrender yourself to the reality of that, letting the lingering adoration from each kiss sink into your skin. Mingi’s yours, he has been since he first laid eyes on you in that library, all you ever had to do was let yourself have him. 

[nicksolemnlyswears]

THE BEAR AND THE BEE HIVE

summary: in which carmy falls for the sweet café owner that supplies him with endless americanos

pairing: carmen berzatto x fem!reader

word count: 14.4k

warning: it's a little bit of a slow burn. sorry. i'm a sucker for it and i feel like carmy is a slow burn kinda guy. 18 +, cursing, smut, p in v, oral (m. receiving), fingering, they use protection guys! i deserve a pat in the back. nothing too wild. oh, and very brief mention of suicide.

a/n: i started writing this way back in october and then it was nearly done and i abandoned it. well i finally got around to completing it tonight!

this is my first time ever writing for carmy and i tried my best writing this. i love carmy and the show but i didn’t expect it to be hard to write him as a character. i wanted to get him right so i took my time with it and didn’t rush it. hopefully you guys like my carmy. enjoy!

i think i've had this stored in my drafts for like 4 months and it's time for me to set it free.

The cigarettes were not enough anymore. No matter how many smoke breaks Carmy took, he still felt the edge on his shoulders. A fear laced with anxiety that overtook him.

After deciding that blowing through yet another wall in his restaurant was the way to go, Carmy took a break. He needed it before he used the sledgehammer to destroy the restaurant in its entirety, along with his dream.

He remembers a coffee shop only a block away from The Bear and thinks he could use a coffee right about now. Maybe the mixture of caffeine and nicotine will be able to relax his shoulders, if only for an hour.

As soon as he opens the door, the smell of ground coffee beans greets him. He looks around, taking in the cozy ambiance the decorative wood brings to the place and the splashes of warm yellow that lighten it up.

Then he sees you, and his focus shifts entirely. His eyes only see you.

"Hi, welcome to Bee Hive!" You chirp with a small smile.

Carmy freezes, forgetting why he's there in the first place. He slowly steps up to the register, where you patiently wait for him. It's just after the lunch rush, so you're in no hurry.

He finds he's acting like a teenager who has just seen a pretty girl. Only he's not a teenager, and you're more than a pretty girl.

"What can I get for you today?" You ask, not noticing the effect you've had on him. You take a sharpie out of your yellow apron, preparing to scribble down his order in a cup.

Carmy has perfected the empty on the outside but screaming on the inside face. Strangers don't tend to know he's almost always losing his shit.

"I-I don't…sorry," Carmy looks at you briefly before diverting his eyes. He apologizes in a flurry, looking for an excuse for his weird behavior, "Uh, it's my first time here. What do you recommend?"

"It's not a problem," you say softly as if to calm him, "I'm a simple girl. I love the latte, but if you're looking for something stronger, the americano is one of the favorites."

Carmy nods as you ramble about the drinks, where the coffee beans come from, and the different notes of each blend. He hangs onto every word that slips from your lips. The static in his brain clearing up for the first time in hours.

It ends too soon as you realize you're talking too much and probably overwhelmed him. You sheepishly smile at him and trail off, but he continues to stare, waiting for you to continue.

"I'll take the Americano," Carmy nods, giving you a tight-lipped smile. Although he had been hanging to every one of your words, he was too focused on the shape of your lips and the sweet tone of your voice.

"Good choice," you nod, grabbing a cup from the tray beside you, "What's your name?"

Carmy looks up, slightly alarmed, as if you've asked for his social security number. "What?" He thinks you'll be forward and ask for his number next, seemingly forgetting how coffee orders work.

"Your name? For the order?" You explain, trying to ease his worries. He's odd, but in an endearing way. You believe this is his first time here because you're confident you would've remembered him.

"Fuck, right, yeah," he nervously says, pinching the bridge of his nose, "My name's Carmen."

"Your Americano will be right out, Carmen," you tell him, capping your sharpie back up.

Carmy quickly pays and stands to the side to wait for his order. He forces himself to not look at you or in your direction as you take other customers' orders. He just knows he's made a fool of himself already. Not that it matters. Why would it matter? He's there for the coffee. Nothing else, no one else.

As he walks out of Bee Hive, he sips his coffee. His shoulders instantly drop, and his fear-induced anxiety starts to dissipate for the moment. He's unsure if the effect is because of the caffeine or the thoughts of your pretty smile.

Visiting your coffee shop becomes routine for Carmy. Whenever things at The Bear become crazy -or he starts to lose his fuckin' mind- he makes his way to Bee Hive with a cigarette hanging from his lips.

For twenty minutes, he's free of Richie's constant hounding, Sugar's struggles with the permits and scheduling, and Sydney's disappointment because the menu is still extremely underway.

Each time he's stopped by, you've been there to greet him, and each time, you've left a little heart by Carmen's name, which makes his heart race in a peculiar way. His hands would touch his chest to check if it was heartburn, but it didn't feel like that. It's not anxiety either cause he knows pretty well how that feels.

All he knows is he hasn't done anything to deserve such a gesture. He's convinced himself you draw little hearts for everyone because he's not special.

One Thursday afternoon, Carmy realizes he doesn't know your name. He looks for a name tag, but you're not wearing one on your yellow apron. He should know your name if you insist on making small talk despite his short answers.

He can't help it. He gets too in his head to answer like a normal person, so his answers come out choppy and dry.

"Alright, Carmen, your order will be right out," you say, handing his cup to one of the baristas. You always hold out and ask him what he wants to order. He has the right to change his mind anytime, but for now, he's stuck with the americano, which he drowns in sugar.

As curiosity eats at him, he gathers the courage to ask. "Thanks. Hey, uh, I've-I’ve never gotten your name…” Carmy says, cursing at himself for not formulating the question correctly. His hand comes up to grip his hair instinctually.

Your smile widens when he asks your name. The silly crush you've developed for your customer fluttering to life. It's just a crush over a stranger, nothing to write home about.

You tell him your name but follow it with "-call me Honey. Everyone knows me by that name. I'm sure if you ask my friends about me with my real name, you'll throw them for a loop."

You're rambling, hoping he doesn't think calling you by your nickname is weird. Then again, how can he judge when he has a sister people call 'Sugar' and he and his siblings also don the nickname 'Bear.'

"Honey." Carmy repeats your nickname, smiling as he finds it fitting. "In that case, call me Carmy."

"Nice to properly meet you, Carmy," you say, grinning.

Like all the days before, Carmy steps aside and waits for his coffee. He doesn't let himself continue the conversation or ask more about you even if it’s everything he wants to do.

It's rare for Carmy to be in a good mood, and whenever it happens, it doesn't tend to last. His goal of opening a restaurant in 12 weeks makes it impossible for him to relax and enjoy the ride. To prolong this unusual feeling, Carmy stops by Bee Hive on his way to The Bear.

"Have you made your boss angry, Honey?" He asks as he pulls out his wallet to pay. He ordered the americano as he always does.

"No…why do you ask?" You ask, tilting your head in confusion.

"Uh, 'cause you-you're always here. Do you not take days off? Not that I'm complaining. I-I like seeing you here." Carmy's words get quieter as he speaks, red creeping up his neck. So much for trying to make a joke.

You look around the room and tell him, "Imma let you in on a little secret."

Carmy follows your hand, waving him to get closer. The smell of cigarettes invades your senses as you get close to him. You'd never admit that the mix of his cigarettes and your coffee is addicting. As both lean over the counter, you whisper, "I'm the boss. I can't run away even if I wanted to."

"You own the coffee shop," Carmy pans in shock.

Carmy is more than surprised at your words. Especially now that he knows how expensive it is to open a business. You can't be a day over 25 and own a successful coffee place. There is hope, after all.

"I do," you nod, standing straight once more.

A couple of years ago, you had inherited a hefty amount of money from an estranged aunt. Fresh out of college and with no real plan, you thought it would be a good moment to follow your dream and open the cozy café.

"How do you do it?" Carmy asks, amazed at the girl smiling at him. "I don't know if you know, but, um, I-I'm opening the restaurant around the block. Used to be The Beef?" He finishes grimly as he points to his side of the block.

"Oh, yeah. The guys who worked there helped me move some equipment when I first opened two years ago," you reveal, "Tell you what, whenever you have a break, come around. I'll give you a free americano and tell you all about it. Neighbor to neighbor."

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, Carmy agrees. "I'll take you up on that."

Weeks go by, and Carmy seemingly forgets about Bee Hive and your pending conversation. You try not to overthink about his absence or how you might've scared him away. He's probably just busy remodeling his restaurant. You know better than anyone how much time that takes.

Still, his presence has become part of your routine, and you can't help but look at the door each time the bell rings. You expect to see him walking up to the counter, the remnants of cigarette smoke coming out his nose as he breathes.

You're pretty close to your assumption because Carmy has been dealing with the fire suppression test. They didn't fail the test once but twice, and if they didn't pass it on the third try, their plan to open the restaurant in 12 weeks goes out the window. Fak has tried everything, and nothing works.

He'd sent Richie once on a coffee run, but the fuckin' idiot went to the nearest Starbucks. Carmy had been looking forward to tasting your coffee and seeing his name in the cup with the little heart because he's 100% sure he's the only Carmen you know. It's not a common name in these parts of town.

One very early morning, he's walking to work, and as he passes Bee Hive, he sees you inside, wiping tables down before you open at 6:30.

Impulsively, he knocks on the glass, not giving himself the time to overthink things. You turn to look at the window and see him standing outside, his hands stuffed in the pockets of his familiar plaid jacket to protect himself from the chilly March air.

"Hey stranger," you greet him, opening the door and inviting him in.

"Hi," he breathes out, staring at you, "you're here early," he tries to casually mention.

You roll your eyes dramatically and say, "It's a downside of the job. Did you know people want coffee at the crack of dawn?"

You try acting as nonchalant as possible. It's not like you missed seeing one of your favorite customers, his beautiful blue eyes, or the way he rocks a simple white t-shirt.

"I had no idea," Carmy smiles, bringing his tattooed hand up to his lips, "I, uh, usually drink mine at night." That much is true. On those sleepless nights when insomnia takes over him, the best remedy is coffee.

"Would you make an exception and join me for a morning coffee at the crack ass of dawn?" Anxiously, you play with the rings on your fingers. It feels like you're asking the guy on a date when it's just a friendly coffee.

"As long as you have some business advice to spare?" Carmy responds shakily. He briefly looks down the street to glimpse at his restaurant. It's too early for anyone to be there yet.

"Deal."

Throwing the towel over your shoulder, you make your way behind the counter. Carmy attempts to make small talk with you as you prepare both drinks.

This is the first time he's watching you in action since you tend to stick to the cash register when he's around. It's not a coincidence. After the first time he came to Bee Hive, you wanted to see more of him, so you stationed yourself at the register where you'd be sure to see him, and he'd see you.

"Here you go." You place his coffee mug on the table along with yours before disappearing momentarily and returning with an orange soufflé coffee cake. You're pulling all the stops for Carmy to leave a good impression.

Carmy thanks you and sips his coffee, "Wow, this is fire!" He expected to taste an americano, but what you prepared was entirely different. He can make out hints of hazelnut and caramel in the coffee.

"Thanks. I took the liberty of changing your order. You can always come back to the americano, though…" you shrug shyly, looking at him over the rim of your mug.

"I-I appreciate it. Thanks." Carmy throws you a nervous grin. He gestures with his tattooed hand to dig into the cake you brought out. He shouldn't be the only one eating.

You and Carmy share the cake as you talk about yourselves and the crazy businesses you own. Somehow, talking to you comes easy to him. He's still nervous and scared to fuck things up, but the warm coffee and your even warmer smile ease him into it.

"How do you do it? This place is always packed, and you seem like you run a tight ship," Carmy wonders, playing with the fork. The cake is long gone, although the notes of orange remain on his tongue. Would you taste the same?

"It wasn't without mistakes. I had to learn a lot from my fuck ups and listen to my team because although I'm the owner, they are the ones doing most of the work. Whenever there's a flaw, they are the first to know," you speak softly, afraid of ruining the calm ambiance you've set up, twirling the small amount of coffee left in your mug.

It's your favorite part of morning coffee. When you have just the smallest bit of coffee left, and you know you'll never drink it because it's cold, but it gives you an excuse to remain where you are.

"So, all I gotta do is listen?" It's funny you say that because Carmy listens, but his friend's voices get muddled somewhere along the way. As much as he tries to focus on them, they merge together and form a cacophony in his head.

"A lot of listening and a lot of experimentation. I've been open for two years, and it's only been in the last six months that I can confidently tell you we found our groove," you admit with a grimace.

Bee Hive is your baby, but bringing it to life was everything but easy. You messed up so many times, costing you so much money. You didn't know shit about owning a business or building one from the ground up. Doing research and putting your pride aside to ask for help got you through it.

"I've only been doing this for, like, less than a fuckin' year, and I already want to pull my hair out," Carmy admits with a pitiful laugh.

"I'm sorry I can't tell you it gets better soon," you say apologetically, reaching for his hand that rests on the table.

Carmy freezes, glancing at your hand on top of his. He hasn't got a clue what to fucking do with the display of affection. Was it a display of affection? He doesn't fucking know. "It's, uh, it's, uh, it's alright. As-as long as you give me coffee, I think I can make it through," Carmen furrows his eyebrows as he stutters through the sentence.

"I can't wait to see what the award-winning chef does," you say, bringing your hand back to your lap, none the wiser to Carmy's internal struggle.

He should've done something to keep your hand on his. Place his other hand on yours or fucking turn his hand around to grasp it. He liked feeling your warm skin on his. It hasn't been a minute since you pulled away, and he's craving it already. It's ridiculous. Is he really that touch-starved that he's seeking affection from a near stranger?

He coughs and darts his eyes between the wooden table top and you, "Fuck. You-you know about that?"

"I might've done some research after finding out you're opening the restaurant. I got curious. I'm sorry." Apologizing is your default thing to do. Messing things up is your area of expertise. You really didn't think he'd mind you mentioning it.

"No, no, no, uh, you don't have to apologize. You just caught me off guard," Carmy shakes his head, reassuring both of you.

"Okay, good," you lightly smile at him, averting your eyes when your gazes meet.

If there's a time for you to make a move, it's now. Taking a shaky breath, you speak up, "I was wondering if you'd ever like to-."

A loud knock on the glass door interrupts you. You and Carmy jump and look towards the source of the noise. It's one of your regular clients, waving at you to open up. Looking at your watch, you see it's 6:30 already.

"Shit. I'm-I'm sorry I took so much of your time," Carmy apologizes, picking up his mug and the plate to put away.

You grab his wrist to make him stop in his tracks, "Relax. I enjoyed talking to you. Maybe we can do it again soon?"

Carmy nods wide-eyed. He likes the idea just as much as you do. You take away the mug and plate with a soft 'okay.' He then follows you to the door as you unlock it and turn the sign to 'open.'

"I, um, gotta go work on the menu. I'll probably be back later for another coffee?" Carmen asks you as if he's asking for permission, which you find adorable.

"I'll be behind the register," you say, watching him walk away. He turns his head back for a moment, and you catch the smile gracing his lips as yours turns to mimic him.

"Oh, he's cute," your customer, an older lady, says, watching him go along with you. "It's about time you got a boyfriend."

"Mrs. O'Hara, here for your tea?" You ask her, ignoring the comment about your love life. That woman will set you up with anyone. She does love her tea, though, and expects you to provide it on time.

It's slow, but Carmen warms up to you. Instead of grabbing his coffee to go, he now drinks it at the café, coincidentally around the same time you take your break.

He's been hesitantly opening up. It's not like he's telling you about how fucked up his family is or how his brother committed suicide. More often, it's about the restaurant and his work as a chef, the struggles of getting every permit they need on a tight schedule since they are supposed to open in about four weeks now, or the occasional childhood memory. It's everything you need to know at this stage.

You love listening to Carmy talk, even if you have to coax it out of him sometimes. He's passionate about the restaurant despite all the stress that comes from it, and he adores the people he works with. He's shy but not in a dorky way because he's actually fascinating. Before meeting him, you never knew that collecting denim was a thing.

The smell of cigarettes that clings to him is also tightly laced with his character. When you step outside to get some sun and the scent of someone smoking hits you, your heart instantly speeds up, hoping it's him coming for his daily americano, or to come swoop you away into a sunset.

"-I fell on my ass in the middle of the street. I was freaking out, thinking I was gonna get run over by a car," you exclaim as you tell Carmy about the crazy Christmas you spent in New York last year.

"It's New York. You probably would have been run over," Carmy chuckles along with you. "There was this one time I was running late and-" His phone vibrating interrupts him.

"Sorry, it's just the fridge guy," he tells you with a furrow of his eyebrows. You notice he does that a lot when he's thinking deeply. Carmy silences it and looks back over to you.

"You should pick that up. A busted fridge is the last thing you need. Trust me. Been there, done that." You encourage him to take the call. The restaurant is more important than your story about how you bruised your coccyx in New York.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Carm! Call him back before you forget," you insist, grabbing his empty cup to trash it. You don't give him any other option, leaving him there to help your employees with a faulty machine.

He watches you closely, closer than ever before. He allows himself to watch how you frown at the machine and how your ringed fingers fumble with the knobs. His eyes keep trailing down involuntarily, and they take in how nicely your jeans hug your ass.

He goes into a spiral into these old pair of Levi jeans popular in the 90s and how they would fit nicely with the shape of your hips and legs. Carmy continues on the tangent, imagining himself peeling them off your body.

The phone vibrating in his hand snaps him out of it. Clearing his throat, he picks up the phone and walks outside. He waves at you through the window as he makes his way back to The Bear. Your frustration at the machine vanishes momentarily as you wave back, except the machine splatters, forcing you to redirect your attention. When you look outside again, he's gone.

Stakes are high at The Bear. There's less than four weeks until Friends and Family, and there is much to do. Marcus has returned from Copenhagen and is working on the desserts. Tina is doing her job as the new sous chef. Fak and Sweeps are helping out wherever they can. And Richie is being Richie, trying to be open but resisting change.

"I need coffee or a pop. Anything with caffeine," Sydney says, throwing her head back. She and Carmen have been working on the chaos menu for hours, and she keeps messing up. Carmy insists that it's okay that they'll adjust and get it right soon, but she's beginning to lose hope.

"Me too. I'd kill for an espresso," Natalie agrees, softly rubbing her hand over her growing bump.

"I thought you couldn't have caffeine cause of the baby," Richie mentions, remembering Tiff's time while pregnant.

"I don't need you to fuckin' tell me what I can or can't eat, Richie," Natalie yells, glaring at him. Although he's right, the doctor told her to limit her caffeine intake. Hard to do when she's up all night thinking about everything she needs to do for The Bear.

"Shit. I'm sorry for fucking caring," Richie screams back, lifting his hands up in defense.

"I can go to the coffee place down the block. Get everyone something," Carmy pipes up, looking forward to seeing you today.

Natalie is quick to shoot that idea down, "You can't. The fridge guy is coming in 20 minutes."

"Fuck, that's right," Carmy groans, digging his head in his hands. His fingers rake through his hair, messing up his curls. He wanted to see you and talk to you, even if it was for five short minutes.

"I'll go," Sydney sighs. She needs to leave the kitchen for more than five minutes, or she'll go crazy, "Just tell me what you guys want to order."

Natalie grumbles about getting decaf, Richie orders a plain black coffee, and Carmy asks for his americano. As Sydney leaves to ask Marcus, Carmy yells after her, "Please, go to Bee Hive. If you get Starbucks, I'm gonna fucking lose it."

Richie and Natalie exchange a look. Richie because he's confused, and Natalie because she knows something is happening with Carmy. He's never been picky over coffee. In fact, they have an old coffee machine in the office that now goes unused because he's always at that coffee shop.

"Sorry, I didn't get the fuckin' memo. Since when is Starbucks bad?" Richie frowns, looking to get a rise out of Carmy.

"I don't think it's about the coffee, cousin," Natalie responds, directing her gaze towards her brother, who is hunched over the counters, chopping vegetables.

"If it's not about the coffee, what is it about?" Richie questions, crossing his arms.

"Shut the fuck up, Sugar," Carmy grumbles, looking at his sister with a glare. He already knows where she's going. She tried to bring it up a couple of days ago after she walked by the coffee shop and saw him being friendly with you.

Natalie smiles and responds, "Carmy has a crush on the barista."

"That's ridiculous. I don't have a crush on her." Carmy shakes his head, avoiding Richie and Natalie's eyes on him. They always do this. They gang up on him if he shows even the slightest interest in a girl. They think they can help, but all they do is embarrass him.

"Come on, Bear. Why else would you go almost every day to get coffee?" Natalie asks, giving him a look.

"Because it's good fuckin' coffee. Jesus, it's not that deep." Carmy grabs the veggies he chopped and drops them into a container to use later.

"It's okay to admit you like a pretty girl, cousin! I'm excited for you! Makes you human and not a lonely hermit," Richie jokes, pushing on Carmy's buttons. "When was the last time you got laid?"

"I swear to God, Richie. Shut the fuck up," Carmy points at him angrily.

"No, I should go with Sydney and see who this girl is!" Richie says, walking out of the half-built kitchen.

Carmy follows him instantly, "You're not going fuckin' anywhere, fuckin' jagoff." He's turning red from anger, seeing Richie with his mocking smile. Natalie follows behind them, amused at the situation. It reminds her of the banters they used to get in with Mickey.

"Admit that you like her," Richie shrugs, giving him a choice.

"No, I won't," Carmy refuses. "You always do this shit."

"Then, I'm going," Richie nods, stepping towards the door.

"Fuck! Shit, alright. I like her, okay? Don't fucking go anywhere," Carmy yells, rubbing a hand on his face out of frustration. It's like he's not allowed to keep anything good to himself.

"Was that so hard?" Richie grins, clapping a hand on Carmy's shoulder.

"Don't fuckin' touch me," Carmy grumbles, walking back to the kitchen. Natalie follows him with a smile, shaking her head at Richie.

Carmy sighs and squeezes his eyes shut. He has yet to admit that he likes you more than he should. He's been avoiding it, afraid of what it might lead to, or rather, what it might not.

He couldn't let Richie go see you. He has a big fuckin' mouth and will tell you Carmy has a crush on you whether it's true or not. Just like that, he feels the sour taste in his mouth, his heartburn making an appearance. Carmy should go look for his pepto before it gets worse.

Unaware of the argument back at The Bear, Sydney walks to Bee Hive. She's walked past many times but has yet to have the time to stop and try it out.

As she waits in line, she reads over the drinks menu. It's clear that it's been carefully curated. Starbucks has nothing on this menu. She can see why Carmy would prefer to come here instead.

When it's her turn to order, Sydney takes out her phone to recite everyone's drink order. She also points to a few pastries, thinking Marcus would like to try some of them and get inspiration. That and she knows Natalie will enjoy them as well.

You're sitting at a table close to the pickup counter. You often find yourself all over the store, ensuring everything goes smoothly. Sometimes, you stop to talk to your regulars and see how they're doing.

You notice Sydney struggling with all the cups she has to carry. It's proving difficult despite the to-go trays your barista put them in. Deciding to approach her, you ask, "Do you need help?"

"Oh, no. I'm fine, thanks," Sydney responds with a nervous smile. She's trying hard to grab everything, including the box with the pastries.

You continue watching her struggle because you know she needs help. You let her try and figure it out for one more minute before stepping in again when she almost drops two of the drinks, "Need some help now?"

"Yeah," Sydney sighs, "I guess I can leave one of the trays here, go to the restaurant, and come back for the rest," she speaks mostly to herself.

"Are you going far?"

"No, just the restaurant down the block," Sydney responds with a sigh, scratching her eyebrow as she tries to figure out the logistics of carrying the drinks. She could get a box to put everything in.

You perk up at her response. The only restaurant down the block is Carmen's. Could she work there? "Carmy's restaurant?"

"You know Carmy?" Sydney asks, tilting her head. Maybe Nat was right. Carmy spends his time here because of the woman in front of her.

"He comes here often. Anyway, I can go with you to help you out. It's not far, and I'd feel bad if your drinks got cold." You offer to help her out because you're a nice person. Not because you want a chance to see the curly-haired man you are developing feelings for.

"You really don't have to…"

"It's really not a problem," you press, grabbing one of the to-go trays and motioning for her to lead the way.

Sydney sighs in defeat and nods, "Thanks. I'm Sydney, by the way."

"I'm Honey," you smile, following her outside.

You chat all the way to the restaurant with Sydney. She reminds you of Carmy in some ways, so you can see why they are friends. Before arriving at the restaurant, Sydney apologizes in advance for any sort of mess there might be, including yelling.

As you near the building under renovation, your palms start to sweat. Maybe you shouldn't have come. You're showing up unannounced, and he's probably too busy to talk to you anyway. You can slip in and out without him noticing. That's the goal now.

You open the door for Sydney, letting her go through first, and quietly follow her into the restaurant. There's no time to escape, as all eyes are instantly on you.

Richie is arguing with Fak when he sees you walk in. He narrows his eyes as Carmy looks in your direction from the kitchen. With just one glance to Carmy's face, he knows who you're supposed to be.

"Guess I didn't have to go anywhere. She came to me," Richie whispers, rushing out the door.

"Shut the fuck up. Where are you going? Don't embarrass me!" Carmy whispers out to Richie unsuccessfully.

"Oh, you'll do that all by yourself," Richie throws over his shoulder.

"Honey, hey, what-what're you doing here?" Carmy speaks, not giving Richie a chance to open his big mouth. He stands between you and Richie, blocking him for the time being.

"Sydney needed help with the drinks," you answer nervously, averting your eyes.

"Oh, thanks for that. You didn't have to," Carmy approaches you and takes the drinks from your hands. His fingers brush with yours momentarily, causing you both to blush.

"I did, or else you probably wouldn't have anything to drink," you whisper to him.

Sydney, Fak, and Richie all watch the interaction amusedly. Richie has a big teasing grin on his face as he makes a plan in his head.

"Hi, I'm Richie! Carmy's cousin," he introduces himself, shoving Carmy to the side and shaking your hand enthusiastically. "I gotta say Carmen right here is obsessed with your coffee. He's banned us from getting Starbucks."

Carmy curses under his breath as Richie does precisely what he tells him not to. He has the urge to throw the coffee at him and run away.

"Is that right?" You ask, amused, looking over at Carmy with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh yeah," Richie answers for him as Carmy tries to find the right words to say. "Cousin, why don't you give the nice lady a tour of the place?"

"It's not done yet. Could be dangerous," Carmy hopelessly says with a gulp.

"Nonsense! You'll take care of her!" Richie insists. He takes the coffee from Carmy's hands and pushes him in your direction. "Go give her a tour."

Richie, Sydney, and Fak all disappear to the office to stay out of the way and try to snoop simultaneously. Fak sends Carmy a not-so-discreet thumbs-up that makes you giggle.

He's internally screaming at his so-called friends but is glad to see you. It was all he wanted before Sydney left to get their drinks. It's strange having you here at The Bear, though. He's so used to seeing you in your own space back at Bee Hive.

Trying to make things better, you say, "Sorry you've been roped into this. You probably have better things to do. I can go-"

Carmy doesn't let you finish. "No, stay. I want to show you around."

"Let's see what you got then, Berzatto," you grin, following him to the kitchen.

Carmy takes his time showing you The Bear. He wants you to stay. He wants to spend time with you but doesn't really know how to say it. So he takes it slow, answers your questions about the restaurant, shows you the front and how everything will be laid out, and introduces you to the ones around, including the fridge guy working on the handle.

Sadly, you get a call from Bee Hive asking you to come back. Carmy walks you outside, dreading having to say goodbye.

"I'm really excited for The Bear to open. You have a great place and team," you tell Carmy.

"I really got lucky with them, huh?" He asks, playing with a dish towel.

"I gotta go. I'll see you later, Berzatto." You don't know where you got the guts to lean towards him and kiss his cheek.

Carmy stays still as his face heats up. You start walking away and throw him a smile over your shoulder. When you're a distance away, he touches the cheek you kissed. Back inside, Richie runs over to Sugar to tell her what he just witnessed.

It's late when Carmy leaves The Bear. As he walks to the train station, he has his hands stuffed in his jacket pocket. On his way, he sees a lone light turned on in your café. Crossing the street to check it out, he sees you're still there with glasses perched on your nose in front of the computer.

He tries the door, and to his luck, it's open. You look in his direction, startled, but relax once you see it's him.

"Nice glasses," Carmy teases, pulling out a chair to sit.

"Are you making fun of me?" You purse your lips, propping your chin on your palm.

"No, I…I think you look cute with them," Carmy admits. After a stern talk from Sugar and Richie, he's realized he should probably make a proper move on you because if what they say is true, you also have a crush on him.

"Thanks," you blush, the light from your screen making it obvious to Carmy, who can't stop the corners of his lips from turning up into a smile.

"Late night?"

"One of my baristas is moving out of state. I have to find someone new, preferably who has experience," you say with a sigh. Glancing at him, you add, "Are you perhaps interested in the position?"

"Poaching me from my own restaurant, nice. I'll let you know I'm an excellent worker," Carmy jokes, tapping his fingers on the table.

There's no doubt in your mind he's an excellent worker. He has to be if he's considered one of the best up-and-coming chefs. Or to work in one of the best restaurants in the world with three Michelin stars.

"I don't know. I'll need references," you speak as if not believing him.

Carmy smiles and softly chuckles, "Fair enough."

There's a moment of silence between the two of you that Carmy is quick to fill, "So, uh, have you had dinner yet by chance?" This is it.

You shake your head no and look at him with hopeful eyes.

"Wanna go grab pizza? I know a place," he asks, finding your gaze on him.

"Say no more," you say, closing your laptop and taking off your glasses. "I'm starving."

Carmy waits for you to lock Bee Hive and grab your things. Then, you both walk to the pizza place. To pass the time, you and Carmy talk about your days and anything that comes to mind. Nothing serious as you get to know each other.

Waiting in line to order the pizza, you tell him all about your nickname and how you were donned 'Honey' to everyone who knows you. In return, he tells you about his nickname 'Bear' and why his restaurant is named as such. For the first time, he dares mention Mickey.

"Best pizza in Chicago," Carmy says, taking a slice of the pie and placing it on your plate.

"I'll see about that," you murmur. You wait until he has a slice of his own and dig in simultaneously.

"It's good, but this is not the best pizza place in Chicago," you say after chewing the first bite, "I'm gonna get your chef license revoked."

"Are you? With what proof? Have you tried all the pizza places to know?"

"I don't have to because I've tried the best," you hum, taking another bite. The cheese stretches as you pull it away.

"Oh yeah? Which one?" Carmy questions you, taking a drink of his beer.

"Mine. The pizza I make is the best," you shrug modestly.

"Wait. You cook?" Carmy asks, giving you a look of surprise.

Cooking is a universal thing. Most people know how to cook up to a degree, yet only some are as confident in their skills as you are. You know you're definitely not up to Carmy's level, but if there is something you know how to do properly, it's pizza.

"Yeah! You're not the only good cook here, Berzatto," you sass back at him, dipping the pizza crust in the marinara sauce.

"Sorry for assuming," he raises his palms.

"You're forgiven," you chirp.

"When will I try this famous pizza of yours then?" Carmy wonders. An attempt to see if you'd like to see more of him.

"I promise I'll make it for you once you open The Bear. You're too stressed to fully enjoy it now," you respond. You were reaching out. Throwing hints that you want this to continue in the foreseeable future.

The conversation continues to flow with an empty pizza box in front of you. Customers come and go until it's only the two of you and a drunk customer picking up his pizza.

"Tell me about your tattoos. Were they an act of rebellion or something else?"

It's an excuse to touch his hands. You reach for them, turning them to see the black ink on his hands and fingers. You gently trace over them with the pads of your fingers. Over the hand that's stabbed, the letters S.O.U. on his knuckles and the forget-me-nots. The one you're dying to touch, though, is the one on his bicep; you'd give anything to feel the hard muscle underneath the rolled-up sleeves of his white t-shirt.

"Uh, my first tattoo is the 773. Got it when I left Chicago for the first time. After that, I sort of became addicted to them. I found they helped my anxiety when it was becoming too much. The pain distracted me and made me feel stronger than I actually was," he says, letting you touch him. He finds that he likes it. Your touch is soft and warm. Comforting.

"So what you're trying to say is you're a masochist," you say, bouncing your eyebrows at him. Your touch goes further up his arm to turn it and look at the fish tattoo on his forearm.

"I guess so," Carmy responds with a breathy laugh, "Do you have any tattoos?"

"Maybe…" You shrug as the pads of your fingers trail back down to his palm until you pull them back towards you. Carmy instantly misses the feeling, opting to cross his arms to retain the warmth you left behind.

"It's bad, isn't it?" He says knowingly. Your reaction told him everything he needed to know.

"The worst," you grimace, shaking your head at the memory of you getting it.

"So, rebellion or something else?"

"Rebellion. For all the wrong reasons," you groan, burying your face in your hands, "Growing up, everyone saw me as a good girl because that's what I was. Breaking the rules terrified me. So, as a teenager, I didn't want to be seen as a goody two shoes, so the summer before I went to college, I decided that getting a tattoo would make me a badass."

"Did it work?"

"God, no. I only got the outline done 'cause it hurt like a bitch. Then I went crying to my parents, fully having a meltdown, apologizing for disappointing them," You scrunch your nose as you say the following words, "They laughed in my face, called me a wimp, and told me to suck it up."

Carmy fully laughs at your story. Head thrown back, eyes closing, "What did you get?"

"That's a secret, Berzatto," you purse your lips, avoiding responding. You just know he'll make fun of you for it.

Everyone who has seen your tattoo has made fun of you for it, yourself included. It's so silly and not badass. Carmy will have to wait to see your tattoo, and you hope this continues so he can see it up close.

"Really? That bad?" Carmy stares wide-eyed.

"It's terrible," you nod, leaning on the table. "We should probably get going before the waitress throws a fit."

Carmy looks over his shoulder to see the waitress glaring at them. It's five minutes till close, and they've made no move to go. He turns back to you and nods towards the door. Carmy helps you with your jacket and leaves a tip on the jar for the waitress. At that, she happily calls after them with a 'Good night!'

"Do you live far?" Carmy asks, seeing how dark it is now that most places have closed. There are too many lamp posts that aren't working. He'd feel better if he could walk you home or you called an Uber. Preferably the former.

"Only a couple of blocks away. Why?"

"It's late. Let me walk you home," Carmy says decidedly, not giving you much of a choice.

"Thanks," you respond with a small smile.

The pace you set is slow. You don't want your time with Carmy to end just yet. He's such an interesting and sweet guy. He's a little awkward, but it adds to his charm, and you can see he's trying.

Somewhere along the way, his hand brushes against yours briefly. Then, it happens again, and you decide to bite the bullet. You grasp his hand in yours.

"Is this okay?" You ask when he falls silent.

Carmy doesn't have a lot of experience with girls. He can't even remember the last time he held a girl's hand. All he knows is he doesn't remember ever feeling this good. "Yes, uh, this is okay."

Carmy walks you up to your front door when you reach your house. You unlock the door but stay outside face-to-face with Carmy.

"Thanks for the pizza," you say, fiddling with your fingers. You were about to make one more move for the night. Because as long as Carmy allows you, you'll keep pushing for more.

"Sorry, it wasn't the best," he retorts, rubbing his jaw with his hand. You notice he does that a lot when nervous.

"Your company made up for it," you reassure him, "g'night Carmy." You kiss his cheek goodbye, watching as his cheeks blush.

"Night," he whispers.

As you turn to leave, Carmy stops you by grabbing your wrist, "Wait-uh, can I? Uh-shit. Fuck it." For a second, Carmy shuts out the excessive thoughts in his head and does what he's been dying to do for weeks.

Carmy cups your jaw and kisses you. It's soft and slow. He gives you enough leeway to pull away if it's something you don't want, but you reciprocate eagerly. You've been waiting for this all night.

As confidence surges through his body, Carmy throws an arm around your waist, pulling you closer. You wrap your arms around him, one of your hands resting on his neck, tangling on his curls. The tug of your fingers feels like heaven.

The kiss turns needy and desperate, your lips moving perfectly in sync. His tongue brushes over your lip; Carmy has been dying to test a theory. Are you as sweet as your name?

He's rewarded by a little noise in the back of your throat as he slips his tongue into your mouth. It's endearing, and he finds a way to make you do it again. With heads tilting to deepen the kiss, he concludes he was right. You're pure honey. Sweet and addicting.

When Carmy returns to his apartment, he gets the urge to create, to cook. He wants to bring your taste to life with his cooking. Something with honey.

"I was wondering if you'd want to come to the restaurant for Family and Friends."

You and Carmy are in your little office at Bee Hive. He stands between your legs as you sit on the desk. His lips are slightly red and swollen, and the hair at the nape of his neck is messier than usual.

"Hm, I could be persuaded," you pretend to think as you play with the golden chain around his neck, pulling him towards you.

"Yeah?" Carmy laughs, leaning to brush his lips against yours. When he feels you nod, he closes the small gap between the two of you.

His hands hold your hips, pulling you impossibly closer. He tastes like coffee, which is to be expected from the discarded cup beside you. It's funny how your relationship, if it could be called that, has moved all around Bee Hive from the register to the front and now to your office.

You're at a weird spot where you're not exactly friends because friends don't kiss, but you're not a couple either. It's a situationship for sure. You're content with what you have now, although you'd also love it if Carmy were to ask you to be more. You pin it on him being shy. He'll get around to it.

"What do you say?" Carmy questions as he kisses a trail from your cheek to your jaw.

"Consider me in," you giggle when he kisses a tickly spot.

Carmy brushes a strand of hair out of your face, remaining close to you. This is what he needs. After months of stress and anxiety of having to deal with The Beef, now The Bear, he needed you and your calming presence. Someone removed from the chaos, a safe haven.

He's quiet as his thoughts consume him, and you take the intimate position to fix his gold chain. Turning it so the clasp faces the back instead of the front. "I'm excited, Carmy," you say with a smile, brushing his cheek with your thumb.

"You can bring someone with you," Carmy offers nervously because he realizes he probably won't have the time to spend much time with you. "I-I don't think I'll be around much. I'm sorry. I'd understand if that makes you change your mind," Carmy drops his head as he braces himself for disappointment.

As the weeks pass, you learn more about Carmy and his insecurities. It doesn't deter you from wanting to be with him. Everyone has their issues. "Berzatto, stop. Look at me," you softly divert his attention, "I'd love to go and support you even if it's from the sidelines."

"You sure?" He asks once more.

If reassurance is what he needs, that's what you'll give. "Don't worry about me. This is your moment, Carmy. Enjoy it. I'll be around afterward."

"Thank you for understanding," Carmy responds, stealing one more kiss from you.

When he returns to The Bear, he helps Sydney prep the dishes they finally chose to serve. He notes how everything is laid out and anything they should fix before opening.

Richie struts into the kitchen with a suit on. Apparently, it's his thing now. Carmy figures staging at Chef Terry's restaurant had a good impact on him. All Carmy wanted was to show Richie he had what it takes. That he's not a fuck up.

"Glad to see things are going well with Honey," Richie thunders.

"What are you talking about?" Carmy says in a rush as he plates the lamb expertly.

"That thing on your neck," Richie says, motioning to his own neck. He has a smug look on his face.

"I don't have time for this, cousin," Carmy grumbles, wiping the plate where the sauce might've splattered.

Groaning, Richie grabs one of the new pans and holds it in front of Carmy. "I don't see anything," he frowns, looking at Richie for an explanation.

"Right here," Richie points towards the edge of his t-shirt around his neck.

Carmy pulls it back and finally spots what Richie has been referring to. There is a fading purple bruise on his skin, a hickey. You must've done it when he was back in your office. He'd been too busy touching you to notice.

Sydney, silently watching, pipes up, "No wonder he hasn't been as on edge lately." Carmy shoots her a glare, which causes her to shrug and laugh with a, "What? It's true."

"Ay, yo, Sugar, get in here!" Richie yells down the hall to the office.

"What is it?" Natalie barges in, afraid something went to shit.

Carmy ignores Richie as he babbles to Natalie what he found. His face is red, though, as Sydney nudges his side.

"That's enough about me. We have shit to do," Carmy shouts in his chef's voice.

Everyone in the kitchen, including Richie and Natalie, repeats, "Yes, chef!"

Walking out of the kitchen Richie, 'whispers' to Natalie, "I've always wondered if he likes to be called chef in bed."

"Fuck off, Richie," Natalie glares, but then it falls, and it's replaced with a teasing grin, "He definitely does."

"I heard that! Don't you two have better things to do?" Carmy screams at them.

"Yes, chef!"

Carmy keeps hearing Cicero's 'Uh-oh' throughout the whole day. He understands Cicero, he really does, but to call you a distraction?

His work with The Bear is only starting. They managed to make it to Friends and Family. Now, they have to keep up their best work to fill up the restaurant daily and have a waiting list. His work is far from done. He should listen to Cicero.

Cicero said it with the best of intentions. He doesn't want the Berzatto siblings to fail. He wants to believe they'll succeed and, most importantly, get him his money.

If there is something Cicero has learned throughout the years, it is that girls are distractions. They mean well, but oftentimes, they keep your eyes off the ball. Especially when it's a new relationship like Carmy's. Ultimately, it's up to Carmy to decide what he wants to do. Cicero has played his part by giving him his advice.

One last delivery is made to the restaurant an hour before opening. Richie is the one to receive it and place it in front of Carmy. "She's a keeper, Cousin," he says with a pointed look and a nod. He also wants the best for Carmy, and yet it doesn't align with Cicero.

You knew Carmy would be too stressed and all over the place to eat or drink, so you sent everyone at The Bear a drink and a pastry. One of the cups has Carmen's name with a little heart and 'good luck' written on it.

"Yeah, she is," Carmy sighs, turning the cup in his hands to look at the message. His thumb brushes over your handwriting longingly. Is listening to Cicero the wise thing to do? He's one of the most successful men he knows in his family.

When it's 10 minutes till open, Carmy changes into his uniform and looks in the mirror. His heart is racing, begging for Friends and Family not to be a complete failure. Walking out of the bathroom, Carmy is a man on a mission.

It starts relatively well, but like everything in Carmy's life, the kitchen starts welcoming in the chaos.

They are too slow getting the orders out, which causes Sydney to start doubting herself and asking Carmy to step in. He reassures her she's doing good. They just have to keep up the pace.

Then, one of the new chefs disappears mid-rush. Forcing Tina to work two stations and Marcus to step out of his to help Sydney. Carmy ignores some weird tension between them as he works on ensuring the dishes are good to go.

Next thing he knows, Sugar is rushing into the kitchen, yelling at him about forks. It's wasted time, as he can't do anything about it. A shrill reverberates inside his head as he looks at the ticking clock. It's enough to give him a headache.

With no one to take a dish to its table, Carmy takes it upon himself to do it. There's no time to re-fire or wait for someone. He places it on their table and pours the tea into their cups before retreating with an 'enjoy.'

He looks at his restaurant, and suddenly, the ringing in his head gets louder. Sitting in a booth is his old boss, staring back at him like he did back in New York. Like he was waiting for Carmy to fail.

His voice echoes in Carmy's head. Why are you so fuckin' slow. Hurry up. Go faster motherfucker. Talentless piece of shit.

Right before Carmy spirals, it all goes away. His focus shifts entirely as he sees you taking your seat for the night. The one he chose because he'd be able to see you from the kitchen. You have successfully blocked the mirage he'd conjured up.

You're there with your brother as Richie talks you up, thanking you for coming. As if sensing him, your eyes lock with Carmys. Shyly, you send him a wave, which he returns, thanking you in his head for getting there at the perfect time.

Carmy ducks back to the kitchen with newfound energy. Richie enters shortly after him.

"Chef, your girl is here."

"Thanks, Chef, um, do you have the notepad?" Carmy asks as he continues cleaning dishes and making sure each one is up to par.

"Here you go."

Taking the notepad from Richie, he begins scribbling. I love- No, too fuckin' soon. Thank you for- Nope, it's too stale.

I'm happy you're here, Honey. Wait for me after you're done? -Bear

"Here," Carmy hands it to him without even looking at Richie.

"Keep up the good work, Chefs," Richie yells out to the room before disappearing to the front of the house. The door swinging shut behind him.

"Yes, Chef!"

Something isn't working in the kitchen. They're too backed up, and no matter how hard they try, they're always a tad too slow. Through Sydney surrounding the wheel to Richie, Carmy steals glances out the kitchen window. You're smiling at whatever your brother says, your lips sipping the wine he chose. Carmy can get through this night because, in the end, you'll be waiting for him.

"There he is," you sing as you spot Carmy walking out of the kitchen. The chef's whites back in his locker as he sports his white t-shirt, jeans, and jacket.

Fak, who kept you company while Carmy finished up, speaks up next, "My brother, I'm gonna grab a sandwich and head home. Honey, it was a pleasure meeting you."

"You too, Neil!"

"Thanks for everything," Carmy tells him, giving him a hug and a pat like dudes do.

Carmy turns and grabs your hand to pull you close and kiss your cheek. "What did you think?"

"It was the most delicious thing I've ever tasted," you tell him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.

There's a reason Carmy has had so many accolades despite his young age. He has a gift in the kitchen. The moment his food touched your taste buds, your life changed. He and Sydney outdid themselves, and the way everything flowed showed how much work they put into the restaurant.

"You're exaggerating," Carmy modestly says, his arms wrapping around your waist.

"I'm really not," you shake your head, pursing your lips. Carmy can't resist placing a small peck on your red-painted lips.

"What about your famous pizza?"

"No, it might be the best pizza in Chicago, but whatever I ate today topped it," you smile at him, scrunching your nose. "Consider your chef's license reinstated,"

"Thanks," Carmy laughs breathily, "Do you mind if we walk? I feel some of the rush still."

"Lead the way, Mr. Berzatto."

Carmy grabs your hand, leading you to the streets of Chicago. It's silent momentarily as the wind cools Carmy's heated face. He places his hand along with yours into his pocket.

"Did your brother like it?" He asks, breaking the ice.

"Oh yeah. I'm officially like the best sister ever," you respond, squeezing his hand.

You had accidentally forgotten that your brother had passed the Bar exam. So, you didn't have time to get him anything in celebration. You figured dinner at a lovely new restaurant would help while you got him a proper present.

"How did you feel throughout, though? It looked intense." You often found yourself looking through the small glass window into the kitchen. They were always on the move, looking for the next thing to do.

"It didn't just look like it. I'm used to it, though," Carmy admits with a sniff. Everyone's best and worst habits shone through for those couple of hours. It's an environment he's all too familiar with, in and out of the kitchen.

"That rough," you grimace.

"It's fine. We have a lot to work on, but it's a start, and it wasn't entirely terrible," Carmy says, thinking back on tonight. Before coming out to meet you, he wrote down a couple of things to go through with Sugar and Sydney.

"Good, 'cause I hope The Bear sticks around the block," you say, bumping your shoulder with his.

You invite Carmy into your house when you arrive. He takes up your offer, holding your hand to help you balance as you take your heels off. It reminds Carmy he forgot to mention how beautiful you looked today.

He follows you to the kitchen, watching your hips sway and your dress skirt swishing. Padding to the wine fridge, you pick out a bottle of red to celebrate.

Carmy indulges in looking at your legs as you stretch up to reach for the glasses of wine up in your cabinets. His blue eyes darken as your dress hikes up, exposing your pretty thighs.

His gaze darts back up at you when you turn around to place the glasses on the kitchen counter. You hand him the wine opener so he can do the honors because you suck at taking the cork out. It's why you mainly stick to cheaper wines with twist-off caps.

"Here is to The Bear and its amazing owner," you say, lifting your glass in front of you.

"Here's to not fuckin' it up entirely," Carmy follows, making you giggle. Your wine glasses clink, and you take a drink.

Placing the glass back down, Carmy pins you against the counter, his strong hands resting on the edge of it. You look at him through your lashes, a hand coming up to his chest to feel the steady thumping of his heart.

"You look beautiful. I like the dress," Carmy murmurs. It's better late than never.

The dress you wear is a pretty shade of light blue. Simple yet dressy. The neckline gives him a good view of your cleavage and has long sleeves to compensate for the shorter length. They currently cover the goosebumps lining your skin.

"Yeah? I picked it out thinking you might," you reveal, biting your lip. The shade reminded you of his eyes.

"You were right," he whispers, cupping your jaw. As pretty as the dress is, he's sure it'll look so much better on the floor.

Carmy closes his eyes as he leans down to kiss you. He's always struggled with words, so he hopes it's enough for you to catch what he's trying to say.

You smile into the kiss, blindly leaving your glass to the side to be able to touch him. Your palm presses against his chest and taut abdomen. He hides a nice amount of muscle under his t-shirts, a pleasant surprise.

Carmy easily lifts you up to sit down on the kitchen island. He steps between your legs, never breaking the heated kiss. The hands on your waist trail down to your thighs and under your dress. Carmy's tattooed hands squeeze your ass and thighs, earning him a moan from you.

This is the farthest you've ever gotten, and you're more than ready to have all of him. Carmy knows this, which leads to his thoughts getting out of control.

He has to make a decision now. Does he allow himself to be with you, or does he remain by himself like always? Richie's, Sugar's, Cicero's, and Sydney's voices all shout at him different things. Some are in favor, and others are in opposition. 'Uh oh.'

He can't lead you on and sleep with you if he will back out tomorrow. The voices become deafening in an instant, ripping him away from your embrace. His emotions bubbled over and spilled all over the place.

"Wait, stop, I just-" Carmy breathes heavily, taking a couple of steps back from you. Carmy's hand comes up to his forehead as he attempts to organize his thoughts.

"What's wrong?" You ask worriedly. Did you do something wrong?

Carmen's thoughts spill out his mouth without making much sense as he paces in your kitchen. "I can't stop thinking about it and owe it to my team..."

"Carm?" You slide off the kitchen counter, approaching him slowly.

"-keeps saying it's a distraction," he rambles mostly to himself. His heart is pounding painfully in his chest. If he didn't know any better, he'd think he was having a heart attack.

"Hey, hey, hey. What's a distraction?" Softly, you grab onto his arms, stopping him in his tracks, trying to find his lost gaze.

"You. Whatever this is," Carmy breathes, finally meeting your eyes, which he instantly regrets as your eyes turn sad.

The watering of your eyes is unintentional, as is the knot forming in your throat. "You think I'm distracting you?" You question barely above a whisper.

His response is instant, "Fuck, no, the opposite. W-When I'm with you or-or think about you, things get clearer, and it's-it's when I feel the most focused." Carmy holds your shoulders, comforting you because he never meant to hurt you. He can't stand the sad look in your eyes.

Slowly, you begin to piece together his rambling and conclude that other people have been telling him you're a distraction. You wonder if they don't want him to be happy. The Bear is the center of Carmy's life, and before that, it was the restaurant in New York. He deserves more than this crazy job.

"Then fuck what others tell you, Carmen. You deserve to have a life outside The Bear." Maybe you're selfish because you don't want to lose him, but you hope he believes your words.

"I-I don't. I don't deserve all your attention or your affection. I'm nothing special. I don't deserve you." Carmy says, shaking his head with furrowed brows.

Weeks ago, he had no source of enjoyment. He said it himself at the support group. Now, he has you, yet he can't bear the thought of you wanting to be with him. He feels like he's tricking you into a bad deal. That's what he is, though, isn't he? An overachieving fuck up with tons upon tons of baggage.

Carmen Berzatto is an anxious person with too many problems in his life. He has a fucked up family. His mother is a mentally unstable alcoholic. His brother was addicted to painkillers and decided that shooting himself on a bridge was better than living this life. That's without mentioning all the trauma he has from his job and the terrible people he's worked with.

What good does he have to offer you?

"Yes, you do," you reassure him, placing your hands on his cheeks. The cool metal of your rings soothes him somewhat, grounding him. "You deserve all that and more, Carmy. You're so sweet and kind and hard-working. You've been through shit. You deserve something good in life. Maybe it's me, or maybe it's not, but don't close yourself off."

You're begging at this point. Whatever this relationship is, it's just starting. He's not giving himself a chance. You like Carmy so damn much. He's funny without knowing it and thoughtful, too. There are so many qualities he doesn't realize he has.

His eyes watch you as tears line them. He's silently pleading for you to convince him. To get him out of his own head and forget the expectations others have on him.

"I'm not going to force you into anything, Carm. It's your call, but I've enjoyed our last couple of months together. I know we don't know each other completely, but I want to know everything about you. I have feelings for you, so whatever you decide, I'll support it."

Being honest is all you can do at this point. You pour your heart out and hope Carmy chooses you.

You and Carmy stand in the middle of your kitchen. Face to face, reaching out towards each other. It's clear as day that you want the same thing. It's only a matter of taking the right steps now.

"I can't let you go," Carmy responds, grabbing the hand on his cheek. His thumb brushes over the back of it.

"Then don't."

Carmy's decision is made. Without another thought, he smashes his lips against yours. He grabs the back of your neck, tilting your head to meet his heated kiss.

It's more intense now that the cards are on the table. Nothing to hold him back.

Tongues clash together as your bodies seek each other out. The temperature rises when Carmy lifts you up to wrap your legs around his hips. His hands are on the back of your thighs, holding tight onto you.

"Bedroom?" He asks, breaking the kiss, a trail of saliva between the two of you.

"Down the hallway," you breathe heavily, kissing down his neck.

Carmy makes it to the bedroom, opening the door with a bang. He spots your bed, placing you in the middle with him holding himself up on top of you.

He watches as your back meets the bed and your fair fans around you like a halo. The curvature of your breasts accentuated even more from the position.

Carmy hikes your leg further up his hips as he dips down to kiss a wet trail down to the neckline of your dress. He leaves open-mouthed kisses on the rounded flesh, nipping at the skin playfully when you arch your back to push more into him.

"Carmy," you breathe, cupping his jaw to pull him back to your lips. Grinding your hips, you manage to graze against his bulge.

"Shit," Carmy shakily curses, thrusting his hips to meet your touch once more.

Curiously, your hands wander across his body. Carmy's moans in your ear make your panties wetter than they already are.

You grasp the hem of his shirt, pulling it up and off. You're desperate to have him, your cunt aches for him. Your nails scratch down his firm stomach when he bites into your earlobe, softly calling your name.

"Unzip me," you pant, pushing him away and pulling your hair off to the side.

Carmy grabs the small zipper, pushing it down and exposing your pretty skin. As he slides the fabric off of you, he kisses your shoulders and back, taking note of the goosebumps on your skin.

His mind is in the present, and nothing can take it away from him. It's like a switch he managed to turn off in his brain. No more family drama, no more The Bear. It's just you...and him. Honey and Bear.

You stretch your neck to the side, giving Carmy more space to pepper kisses across the delicate skin. The dress pooling at your feet exposes your chest, and Carmy's hands come up from behind you. His fingers shyly brush up your stomach, tickling you, until they find your breasts.

He draws a moan from you as he squeezes them in his palms, pushing you back to meet his chest; turning your head to the side, you find his lips.

The kiss breaks when he slides one of his hands into your underwear, dipping his finger to feel your wetness. Your arm reaches back to dig your fist in his curls.

"You're soaked, Honey," he moans, finding your clit to tease it.

"Been waiting for so long, Carmy," you whine as your hips stutter along with the flicks of his wrist.

"I'm sorry. I'm here now," he purrs into your ear.

Carmy can hear the distinct 'shlick, shlick, shlick' of his fingers against your clit. It spurs him on as he slips a finger into you. He can't wait to have his cock inside of you, snug and warm.

"Oh my god, Carmen," you gasp when he prods another finger into your entrance. Hanging onto his arm across your chest, you roll your hips against his fingers.

"I got you," he says, digging his fingers deeper into you and curling them.

Your knees buckle as the tips of his fingers curl and hit your g spot repeatedly. If it weren't for him, you'd be on the floor. With your tummy tensing under the weight of the pleasure, you stutter out, "I'm gonna cum."

Carmy's hand is wet from your juices as he ups the ante. Just as your walls begin to squeeze around his fingers, he pulls them out to circle around your clit.

"Oh, f-fuck!" You squeal, throwing your head back onto his shoulder.

The way your clit softly twitches under the pads of his fingers fucks with Carmy. It makes his cock throb and leak into his jeans.

Untangling from his embrace, you place a breathless kiss on Carmy's lips. His slick digits dig into your hips as he prolongs it.

Blindly, you find the edge of his jeans and unbutton them. If Carmy notices, he doesn't say anything. You want to give him one more reason to stay with you.

He moans into your mouth when you grasp his length through his boxers. He's rock hard as he desperately ruts against your hand.

With your hold still on him, you push him to sit on the bed. Carmy looks up at you lustfully. You plant a single short kiss on his lips before kneeling on the floor between his legs. You leave love bites down his chest while looking up at him through your lashes.

Carmy brushes away any hair that falls on your face, his blue eyes focused solely on you. When you reach the waistband of his pants, you pull them down along with his underwear.

His length pops up from its confines, slapping against his tummy. Its tip is a pretty pink shade, with a thick length and a slight curve to it. You salivate instantly at the sight of it.

Carmy's nervous under you. It's been a long since he's been with someone else, and he's never been the most confident.

"Relax," you say teasingly, kissing around his lower tummy to calm him.

Finally, your hand wraps around his cock, lightly pumping it. Leaving sloppy kisses down his happy trail, you feel Carmy's stomach taut in anticipation.

It's been so fuckin' long.

With your eyes staring into his hungry ones, you kiss the pink head that glistens with pre, teasingly brushing it against your lips. Keeping eye contact, you lick his length from base to tip. You alternate between kissing and licking for a minute, enjoying watching Carmy squirm.

"Fuck, Honey," Carmy throws his head back at your torturous pace.

"Look at me," you sweetly say.

Taking mercy on him, you part your lips to take his length into your warm, wet mouth, bobbing your head to a steady rhythm. Prying one of Carmy's hands from the bedsheets, you place it in your hair, encouraging him to use you.

"Good girl," he moans, fisting your hair to force you to take more of his cock. You let your hands rest on his thighs, feeling the strong muscles underneath.

Carmen observes you with hooded eyes as you hollow your cheeks, sucking him expertly. He's obsessed with how your lips leave behind a tinge of red lipstick on his skin.

"Shit-Fuck me," he yells into the room when you swallow around him.

You want him to cum, but Carmy has other plans. He doesn't think he'll last long if you make him cum now, so after the stunt you pulled, he pulls you off his sensitive cock.

The sight in front of him is erotic as a string of saliva connects you to his cock. The tears lining your eyes and blushed nose add to that pretty picture.

"c'me 'ere," he says, helping you up and kissing you as he leads you back to the bed. He tugs off your wet panties, throwing them somewhere in the room.

You lay back on your pillows with Carmy slotted between your legs. It's torture having him so close and yet so far. Now that you've gotten a taste of his cock you need more.

Carmy touches the inside of your thighs, inching his way closer to your cunt. He instantly notices how fuckin' wet you are. You're dripping even more than before.

"Sucking me off, got you this wet, princess?" He asks, leaning his forehead against yours.

"Mhm, Carmy, wish you would've cum in my mouth," you admit, tilting your head up to brush your lips against his.

"You have such a dirty fuckin' mouth," he chuckles darkly.

Where did this side of you come from? You're usually so sweet and delicate. He should've known you would be a freak in bed. To think he almost let this all go.

"Carmen, please."

"Please, what?" Carmen teases, lining his cock against your opening, wetting his cock.

"Fuck me," you moan, kissing his jaw.

"'m gonna fuck you good, princess," he promises, with a shaky nod before he remembers, "Fuck! I-I don't have a condom with me."

"I should have some in my drawer," you mention breathlessly.

Carmy opens the condom in record time but is surprised when you take it from his hands and roll it down his shaft yourself. You just want an excuse to keep touching him.

With your leg hiked up, he aligns himself and slowly pushes in. You both gasp at the sensation. Carmy, for one, is trying to not bust a nut so soon because you're so tight and warm.

Meanwhile, you hold onto Carmy's back as he stretches you out. It's been so long, and your toys aren't nearly as thick as him. You breathily moan in his ear, which he takes as a good sign as he begins thrusting more forcefully and deeper.

Carmy hopes this isn't a dream, and if it is, he hopes he doesn't wake up anytime soon. He has one hand holding onto your thigh and the other holding himself up. His gold chain dangles above you as he picks his head up from its spot on your shoulder. You take the chance to tug on it, returning his attention to your lips.

"You feel so fuckin' good, princess," Carmy groans, squeezing your thigh.

"I love your cock, Carmy," you whine, feeling the drag of his cock on your walls. The pleasure is all-consuming, leaving a fuzzy feeling in your brain.

"You like when I fuck you like this?"

"Yes, yes, yes, keep going."

His hips snap hard against yours, hitting that spot each and every time. His pelvis hitting your clit. He squeezes your thigh, hips, and sides before his hand squeezes your tits, too, playing with your nipples.

Suddenly, he straightens up, pulling you down the bed to have you flushed against his pelvis. He's a sight for sore eyes that forces you to keep your eyes open.

His thrusts are more forceful like this, where he digs his fingers into the fat of your hips to pull you towards him with each snap. It makes your tits bounce, hypnotizing him.

Through your lustful gaze, he looks like a marble statue. His chest glimmers under the lowlights of your room as sweat clings to him, his chain jumping against the blushed skin of his chest, and his fucking hair falling over his pretty eyes. The set of his jaw could've been sculpted by Michaelangelo himself.

Your hands indulgently reach down to touch him in any way you can. You can only reach his stomach, where a nice pair of abs appear due to the effort.

"You like what you see?" Carmy teases. He's entirely lost on you because otherwise, he wouldn't be as cocky to say that.

"You're so handsome," you pitifully say. Your brain not computing as it should, but how can it when it's being fucked out of you?

Carmy doesn't know how to respond. It's not often he's called handsome or looked at as lustfully as you're looking at him. Thankfully, he doesn't need to say much as your eyes roll back and you squeeze your walls around him.

"Carmy, I'm so close," you pant, trying to find any part of him to hold. He offers you his hand, lacing your fingers together.

"Just a little longer, princess," Carmy groans as you clench around him. "Fuck, don't do that to me."

He glances down at the spot where you and him meet to see a ring of white on the base of his cock. He's enthralled with the way you stretch to accommodate him and the way your pink walls drag along his length when he pulls out. Fuckin' beautiful.

Putting all his knowledge to use, he thumbs your clit, making you jolt. He needs you to cum now, or he won't make it. His balls feel like they're about to burst.

"Carmy," you cry out, tightening the hold on his hand.

You teeter on the edge for only a second until you cum, waves of pleasure washing over you. Carmy curses from above you as your tightening walls choke his cock, making him cum too. He stutters his hips a couple more times, riding out his orgasm.

He leans back down again, catching your lips in a small kiss. His body slowly relaxes against yours as his head rests on your neck, breathing in the scent of sweat and perfume.

"That was good," you breathe heavily, rubbing your hands up and down your back. You're just starting to think clearly.

"Fuckin' amazing," he adds.

There's a beat of silence before you both burst out laughing.

A bubble encases you, and it can't be popped as long as you stay in your bedroom. Carmy doesn't want to leave; it's late already, and in a couple of hours, he has to get up and go to The Bear to repeat the process.

For once, he forgets about that and focuses solely on you. He has a couple of hours to spare. Sleep is overrated.

You face each other on the bed, talking in hushed whispers. Your fingers trace the '773' tattoo on his bicep like you've always wanted to do. It tickles Carmy, so he grabs your hand and kisses your palm.

"Now that I'm thinking about it. I didn't see your tattoo," he whispers to prevent disturbing the peace.

Your face warms at his words. You had forgotten about that. He's seen a lot of you in the past couple of hours. What's a bit more of skin?

"You missed my big bad tattoo?" you joke, poking his nose.

"Show me," he says with a lopsided smile.

You make it dramatic, rolling your eyes and giving him a big sigh. Sitting up on the bed, you peel the bed sheets from your body. Carmy props himself up on his elbow in anticipation.

Right there, on your left side and under the curve of your breast is a small outline of Winnie the Pooh's face. Carmy touches it, biting his lip to hold back a laugh. Unsurprisingly, it's precisely what he expected from you.

A few chuckles pass his lips as he pulls you back into his arms.

"Don't laugh. It made sense at the time," you whine, covering yourself back up.

Carmy pulls you to his chest, kissing your temple, "I'm sure it does. Pooh Bear loves his Honey," Just like he does.

"Exactly! Someone gets it!"

And he does because Carmy, aka The Bear, is quickly falling for his Honey.

A couple of days later, Carmy is back at your house helping you prepare the famous pizza you promised him. He lets you take the lead on everything, preferring to follow your instructions rather than let his mind run wild. It's not like you'll let him do most of the work anyway; it's your recipe, and you're protective over it.

"Can you chop up the veggies?" You ask him as you lay down the dough in a pan.

"Yes, Chef," he nods, kissing your cheek as he digs through your kitchen drawers for a knife.

"Oh, I like the sound of that," you muse, shaking your shoulders as you knead the dough to spread it.

"Don't let it get to your head, Hun," Carmy smiles, slicing the vegetables expertly.

Cooking with Carmy is surprisingly easier than you thought. He's not controlling over the kitchen or judgy. He lets you do your thing in peace, following your orders no matter how strange they might be. This is your kitchen, not his.

As you spread the sauce and cheese over one of the doughs, Carmy gets a call. He wipes his hands with a rag and picks it up. You only hear his side of the conversation.

"No, I'm off tonight. I'm with my girl. Call Sugar. She should be able to help you with that. Great. Thanks."

Carmy had promised himself that he would try to balance it all better. He has his team to help each other out. The Bear is a priority, but so are you because you help him keep whatever sanity he has left.

Carmy hangs up, and when he returns to you, he notices the grin on your lips as you put the toppings he chopped on the pizza.

"What's with the smile?" Carmy stands behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist as he props his head on your shoulder. Your hair tickles his nose, smelling the notes of coconut of your shampoo he digs his head farther into it.

"I'm your girl?" You ask, the smile still present on your face. He'd missed your initial reaction when you heard him call you 'my girl.' You almost dropped the container of pepperoni that was in your hands. It's a shock cause he never asked you to be his girl.

Carmy pauses and tenses up against you. "Uh, yes? Hold up. Turn around," he orders, as he places his hand on your hips to turn your body around.

"Yes, chef," you respond cheekily, your arms around his neck, careful not to touch his sweater with your messy hands.

"Aren't you my girl?" He frowns, rubbing a thumb over your hips.

"I could be, but I don't remember you asking," you pretend to think.

Carmy never directly asked you to be his girlfriend, and you never asked him to be your boyfriend. You might as well be a couple since you've been dating long enough. You decide to seize the opportunity now to get it out of him. Having a proper anniversary day would be nice because you hope this lasts.

"I see, my mistake," Carmy nods, catching your vibe, "Honey…"

"Yes, Carmy?" You blink innocently at him.

"Would you do me the honor of becoming my girlfriend?" He finally asks.

You could joke around but decided against it cause the moment is perfect, "I'd love to," you nod, giving him a small kiss.

When the pizza is cooked, you bring it over to the dining table. Serving Carmy a pretty slice. Excitedly, you wait for him to bite into it and taste it.

"What do you think?" You ask expectantly.

"You were right. Best pizza in Chicago," Carmy agrees with an unbelievable laugh. He's got a lot to learn from you. It's the truth, or maybe he's blinded by his feelings. Only time will tell where you and Carmy will end up.

The End?

thank you guys for pulling through and reading! i know it's a slow burn but i hope you liked it! i certainly enjoyed writing it even though it took me like 4 months.

if you liked it, i would appreciate you liking it, commenting or reblogging. if you have some feedback feel free to send it my way too. i wanna get better at this whole writing thing!

thank you! bye xx

[yjhzies]

“Tiptoe and kiss.” — Kim Mingyu

⸝⸝୭ ˚. fluff . one-shot . cute

⋆ pairings : mingyu x gn!reader ⋆ warning : reader is kinda grumpy due to just waking up (inspired by real life y'all 😔) ⋆ wc : 0.4k [✉️] · Mingyu's plan backfiring? A daily routine now. (only if he wasn't so down bad)

⋆ - note : YALL I HAD SO MANY UNFINISHED WRITINGS ITS INSANE. I finished some of them and I'll probably continue posting for a few days before I start a series <3 stay tuned!!

"Gyu?" You peep your head in the kitchen. You had slept in almost the entire afternoon, but when you felt Mingyu's side of the bed cold, you were wide awake.

Mingyu turned at the sound of your voice and smiled. "You're awake? how was your sleep?" He asked as you walked towards him, still trying to adjust to the lighting.

"Pretty good.." You mumble, wrapping your arms around his side and rested your head on his shoulder.

Your blurry vision made Mingyu look more big than he was, and you furrowed your eyebrows trying to get a clear view of your surroundings.

"That's good, I was just about to wake you up. I'm preparing noodles for us." Mingyu says, glancing at you with a soft smile.

You hum and nod in response-something in you too lazy to word out a better response. But you could think of an even better response. You tiptoe to peck his cheek, but couldn't reach him as he didn't lean down.

You weren't short, Mingyu was too tall.

And it was true, your height was just above average but Mingyu? A literal 6'2 man. You'd have to be a giant to almost reach his height.

Maybe he didn't realise-so you try once again, and again, but Mingyu still didn't lean down for you to kiss his cheek. But you could see more clearer to notice the slight smug smile spreading across his face, making you frown.

"Hey, don't ignore me."

"Huh?"

"I said don't ignore me."

"What do you mean, baby? I'm not ignoring you." Mingyu said softly, biting his lower lip to stop the smile tugging at his lips. He turned to you, barely managing to hold back his laugh at the sight of your pout.

"You're doing this on purpose..." You say, rolling your eyes. Despite being a little sleepy, you couldn't shake off the feeling of irritation at how Mingyu decided to tease you instead of wrapping his arms around you and letting you kiss him.

Mingyu finally burst into a fit of laughter, wrapping his arms around your waist and putting his head on your shoulder to stabilize himself.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," He apologized between giggles, tightening his strong arms around you.

That stupid little fang smile of his, making you smile aswell. He leaned down, just like he always did so that you can kiss him all over his face, and closed his eyes.

"Here you go," he waited for your soft lips to press against his skin.

"What?"

Mingyu opens his eyes, looking at you with raised eyebrows. "Hm?"

"What are you doing?" You ask, placing your hands on his chest. It was your turn to tease him now.

Mingyu blinked, and slowly straighted himself. He looked down at your hand and let his lower lip jut out into a pout.

"I'm sorry, baby, I shouldn't have teased you." His voice barely above a whisper, he apologized. And now, you burst into a fit a laughter and gently grab his face to peck his lips.

His pout immediately turned into a grin as his hands find your lower back, and he softly deepens the kiss.

[hoe4hotchner]

hey! i love your stuff :)! was wondering if you could maybe do a short fic with hotch where he's interrogating the reader (who is a suspect, but is actually innocent), and the reader politely informs hotch that they're about to faint (they have a fainting condition, like POTS or something). hotch doesn't panic bc he's, well, hotch, but he calls for medical help. meanwhile, reader is just casually lying down on the cold floor of the cell and being really chill waiting to faint, even making conversation. anyway, hotch finds out that the police officers who had arrested the reader had denied them their medicine, and he rips them a new one.

OBVIOUSLY DONT WRITE IT IF YOU DONT WANT TO, I THINK YOU'RE LOVELY AND I DONT WANT TO PRESSURE YOu

have a nice day!

Unexpected Interrogation | [A.H]

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x gn!reader | WC: 0.9k | CW: Hurt/comfort?, medical condition (POTS), mistreatment by law enforcement, fainting, medication.

A/N: I'm trying a new layout for when I answer requests, I don't know if I'll commit to it, but I like it for now.

Also I don't know anything about POTS or other fainting conditions, so I hope I did it justice - feedback is appriciated.

Hotch sat across from you, his expression stern and unyielding as he leaned forward in his chair, the dim lighting of the room casting sharp shadows on his face. To any observer, you would seem calm - your hands folded neatly in your lap and eyes focused - but inside, you were already feeling the telltale signs. The tightness in your chest, the lightheadedness creeping in. You’d been here for hours, and now, without your medicine, it was simply a matter of time before you would faint.

"You've been uncooperative since the moment we brought you in," Hotch said, his voice level but carrying the weight of suspicion as he couldn't quite figure out if you were guilty or not. "Tell me why you were at the scene."

You took a slow breath, trying to center yourself. "Agent Hotchner," you said politely, your voice a little too soft for the intensity of the moment. "I understand why I'm here, and I will tell you everything you want to know, but I think I should let you know… I'm about to faint."

He blinked, his gaze sharpening but not a trace of panic crossing his face. If anything, his brows furrowed, a mixture of confusion and concern settling in his expression. "You're about to faint?"

"Yeah," you nodded, shifting slightly in your seat, trying to ignore the swimming sensation behind your eyes. "I have a fainting condition - it's called POTS. Normally, I’d take medicine, but..." You gave a tired shrug. "The officers who arrested me didn’t let me have it."

The tension in the room shifted. Hotch leaned back slightly, the gears in his mind already turning. He wasn’t a man to panic, even in strange situations. He pressed a button on the desk to signal for help, keeping his eyes on you. "I’ll get a medic in here."

You offered him a small smile. "Thanks, but it’s cool. Happens all the time. I’ll just… lie down." Without waiting for a response, you eased yourself off the chair - thankful that you weren't cuffed to the table - and laid flat on the cold tiled floor, your head resting on your arms as if this was the most natural thing in the world. The coolness of the floor helped somewhat, but your vision was already narrowing at the edges.

Hotch stood, watching you for a moment before kneeling next to you, his tone softened slightly. "How long have you been without your medication?"

You glanced at him from your place on the floor, blinking slowly. "Since they arrested me… hours ago? Honestly, it could be worse. But you know, fainting isn’t great for clearing one’s name." You chuckled lightly, trying to make the best of the situation, though it quickly turned into a weary sigh. "I’m innocent, by the way."

He didn't respond to that directly, but there was a flicker in his eyes, something acknowledging the injustice of your situation. "How often does this happen?"

"Often enough that I’m pretty used to it," you said casually, your breath slowing as the dizziness increased. "But hey... it gives me an excuse to lie down on the job, right?"

A small smile tugged at the corner of Hotch’s mouth - just for a moment - but then his professional mask slipped back into place. "Don’t talk. Just focus on staying calm."

You hummed in agreement, though your vision was blurring fast. "I’ll be out soon, but when I wake up, I’d love to continue this conversation. I mean, I know I’m innocent, but it would be great to convince you of that too."

He gave a short nod. "We’ll get to that. First, let’s get you taken care of."

Moments later, the medics arrived, rushing into the room with a stretcher and medical kit. But Hotch didn’t leave your side, ensuring they knew about your condition, making sure they were doing everything right. As they checked your vitals and prepared to move you, you started to fade, your words becoming slow and drowsy. "Thanks, agent… you’re not as intimidating as I thought you’d be."

The medic smiled at that, while Hotch’s lips pressed into a thin line, the smallest hint of amusement in his eyes. But once you were being taken care of, Hotch’s focus shifted back to the situation that had led to this. The officers who had arrested you. The ones who had denied you your medication.

Minutes later, Hotch found the officers outside the room, his demeanor stone cold. “Which one of you denied the suspect their medication?”

One of the officers, a tall man with a smug expression, stepped forward. “We didn’t think it was relevant. They didn’t say it was urgent.”

Hotch’s eyes darkened, his voice dropping to a low tone. “Didn’t think it was relevant? You’re lucky they’re stable, or you’d be facing a lawsuit at the very least.” He took a step closer, towering over the man. “You do not withhold medical treatment from anyone in custody. I don’t care if they’re a suspect, a witness, or guilty. Do you understand?”

The officer faltered, clearly not expecting the sharp reprimand. “Y-yes, sir.”

“I’ll be filing a report about this. You’ve jeopardized a life today. If I ever hear of anything of the sort again, you’ll be out of a job.” Hotch didn’t wait for a response, turning on his heel and heading back toward the interrogation room. There were few things that set him off more than mistreatment, especially under his watch.

He returned just as the medics were finishing up. You were still unconscious, but stable. Hotch stood by the door for a moment, watching as they prepared to transport you, his expression unreadable.

Innocent or not, he was going to make sure you were treated right.

[flwrstqr]

CALL ME YOURS !! (LHS - 이희승)

SYNOPSIS: ever since you broke up with your ex, choi jiho, who cheated on you with another girl, you have always wanted to get revenge. when you meet jiho again at school, to prove you were over him and had met a better man, you told him you were meeting someone. you lied and told him you were meeting a random guy who you pointed at on your school's bulletin board for being the top student in the whole school. coincidentally, that guy was lee heeseung, known for his quiet and smart personality. then jiho demands to meet him in real life, hand-in-hand with you, which now you have a huge problem. first, you have to find heeseung, and next, you have to date him.

pairing: topstudent!heeseung x popularstudentfem!reader

genre: fake dating, s2l, romance, high school au, sunshine x cold

warning(s): reader + heeseung being in denial, your ex cheated, kissing, inspired by a k-drama (i forgot which one), two of them being awfully awkward at first, swearing, grammar errors, party, lots of love confusions, does say that winter is dating beomgyu, punching, fighting

word count: 7k

AN: guys im back with a long au, i never really write long aus, so this is slightly new to me. i did proofread it but not super thoroughly so if i made any mistakes, my bad for that .

taglist: @yenqa @mylstserenade @jlheon @naespas @jooniesbears-blog @erehkinnie30 @wonifullove @miumiuisme @shawnyle @dimplewonie @beomluvrr @jiaant11 @teddywonss

ALL YOU WANTED WAS REVENGE. Sweet revenge against your idiotic ex, Choi Jiho.You remember the moment you walked into the girls locker room to go deliver something to your PE coach, only to find the room “empty”. It hit you like a ton of bricks when you stumbled upon Jiho, locking lips with your “supposed” best friend, Kim Haeun, in the girl’s locker room Lip on lip, eyes closed, moving in sync. Heart shattered, tears streaming, you bolted, tripping over a basket of equipment and scraping your knees quickly catching attention of Jiho. His voice trailed after you, calling your name as you fled into the distance.

Losing both your best friend and your boyfriend cut deep. Being single was one thing, but being unable to find anyone who measured up to Jiho was another.

"YN, your standards for men are too high!" Karina remarked from the bleachers during PE.

You shrugged. "They've always been high." For the past 4 months, no one was your type compared to Jiho, the perfect boyfriend in your eyes: tall, handsome, a football player, rich, and occasionally nice.

"It's because of that disgusting asshole," Ningning scoffed.

"He isn't disgusting!" you retorted.

"YN, you need to get over him. This is just becoming toxic, plus you dumped him in front of the whole school ," Giselle chimed in. She was right. You vividly recalled the moment, twenty minutes before the bell, eyes swollen from crying all night but disguised behind makeup, replaying yesterday's scene you witnessed in your mind.

"YN!" Jiho's voice snapped you back to reality, his figure rushing towards you.

"Can we talk?" he asked, breathless.

"Talk about how you fucking cheated on me? Fine, I'll hear you out," you yelled, drawing everyone's attention.

"Can you keep it down, YN?" Jiho snapped.

"Sure I’ll quiet it down when I want to. Go to your girlfriend, Haeun. Why does she have to be my best friend, out of all people?" you glared.

"YN, let's talk inside," Jiho groaned, irritated.

"No, we're done. I never wanted you anyway, you asshole. Just fuck off," you spat, the words stinging even as they left your mouth The next thing you knew the scene spreaded like wildfire at school.

"Are you okay?" Minjeong asked as you sobbed at the lunch table.

"Listen, YN, Jiho wasn't worth it. You saw what you saw," Karina tried to console.

"I don't know... it's just over now," you murmured, head in your hands.

"Maybe it's a sign to find someone better," Ningning suggested.

"I don't know..." you whispered, feeling lost, unable to move on.

“I’m for sure there’s someone way better than him.” Giselle added (biggest lie you ever heard).

MONTHS PASSED AND YOU FOUND YOURSELF IN THE LIBRARY, lending a hand to the librarian in organizing books before school started. As you went about your duties, dropping off books and preparing to fetch more, the one and only, Jiho, stood by the school bulletin board waiting for you. It had been months since the breakup, and yet, the wound was still fresh, a constant reminder of the pain (really yn..)

"I wanted to say a word," Jiho awkwardly mumbled, eyeing you for a reaction, his hands in his pockets.

You reluctantly agreed, "Fine, make it quick. I'm busy."

"I broke up with Haeun," he stated, the words hanging in the air.

"What?" Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. 

"I ended things with Kim Haeun," he said more firmly. His words sank in, but confusion lingered. But why was he telling you this now? Then it hit you—he wanted you back. Yet, on a day when you missed him, you suddenly felt nothing. He had left you for another girl (well, technically, you dumped him), betrayed you, and now he came back because you were his second choice?

"Why are you telling me this?" You managed to maintain calm.

"I still like you, YN LN," he confessed, causing your eyes to widen. You bit your lip, before you could accept his confession like your 5 minute ago self would. Your heart didn’t thump like it did when you were around him. Your hands weren’t sweaty like they were when he looked at you before. Your mind wasn’t racing like it was when Jiho confessed to you for the first time, months ago. It was nothing like any of that–you just felt empty and cold.

"I'm seeing someone," you blurted out, realizing the lie you had just said. Crossing your fingers, you hoped he wouldn't ask about the identity of your "so-said boyfriend"

"Who?" he inquired, raising his eyebrow. Desperately searching for an excuse, your eyes landed on the bulletin board, displaying a list of top students and their ID photos.

Rushing over, you pointed at the first photo and name you saw, "That guy," you said, reading his name, "...Lee Heeseung! I'm dating him."

"Oh, really?" Jiho cast a skeptical glance between you and the photo, a smirk playing on his lips. "Then," he leaned in closer, "how about you introduce me to him, hand-in-hand, next week? I want to see if he's worthy of you." Panic rushed in you, and your throat went dry. You forced a smile and nodded in reluctant agreement.

"Sure," you replied.

"Great, see you next week," Jiho said, turning and walking away. You were officially doomed. Now, you have to find this Lee Heeseung and give him a deal.

YOU WANDERED DURING LUNCH, TRYING TO FIND HEESEUNG. You only heard about him because he got a perfect score on the hardest SAT exams, but you didn't really pay attention.

"Heeseung? Sorry, I don’t know who he is," a girl replied when you asked her about Heeseung.

"It's okay," you smiled politely and left, feeling frustrated.

"I'll never find him," you groaned to Karina, who was with you while you asked everyone about Heeseung.

"Why did you lie to Jiho then? I thought you weren’t over him. Last night, you were giggling at how cute Jiho is and how much you want him back," Karina asked, taking a bite of her apple.

"I don’t know. He was just using me. I knew it because he and Haeun broke up," you explained, letting out a soft sigh. "He saw me as a second option, and I got into this mess because I lied to him about having a boyfriend who's probably some ugly nerd."

"I told you he was using you the entire time! But you didn’t trust me!" Karina scolded you.

"Sorry, I was just blind back then," you mumbled.

Before your last attempt, you walked up to a boy and asked the same question you’d been asking everyone.

"Do you know Lee Heeseung by any chance?" you asked. The boy's eyes widened, and a big grin spread across his face.

"Yes, I do! For what reason?" the boy quickly replied. For the first time, someone knew who he was.

"Do you know where he is then?" you inquired, hoping he could help.

"I do. I’m close friends with him. Come, I’ll show you where he is," the boy replied as you followed him, waving to Karina goodbye.

As the two of you awkwardly made up the long staircase, you arrived at the rooftop of the school. When the boy opened the door, a lonely figure sat by the table, reading a book.

"Heeseung!" the boy called out, causing the figure, supposedly Heeseung, to turn around.

"What, Jungwon?" Heeseung raised his eyebrow, quickly glancing at you and then back at Jungwon.

"YN was looking for you," Jungwon quickly said, nudging you to speak. Heeseung obviously knew who you were, known for dating Jiho and your soft-delicate visuals.

You walked towards him awkwardly, “Uhm…can we talk privately?” Slightly glancing at Jungwon, signaling him to leave quietly. As Jungwon left quietly, you cleared your throat.

“So…” you started off a bit nervous, “I need some help?”

"What help?" Heeseung answered a bit coldly, “If it’s anything studying related, I’m not interested-”

"I need help dating," you blurted, realizing what you had just said.

"What?" Heeseung gave you a puzzled look, "Dating what?"

"I lied to Jiho. Okay, I don’t have interest in you or even Jiho. I lied to him saying that I’m meeting you," you spilled the news. Heeseung had an empty look on his face as you tried to read his expression.

“Why me?” Heeseung arched his eyebrow.

“You were the first name I saw,” you explained, “So can you fake date me? I need it, please,” you pleaded, hoping he would accept your request.

"No, I’m not interested," he turned around, quickly getting his book to start reading again. Your jaw dropped, no one had ever rejected you like that.

"What?" you spat, feeling terrible that you got rejected for the first time.

"I’m not interested in you or in dating. So, I strongly believe that I shouldn’t do it," he said, quickly focusing his attention on his book.

“I’ll do anything!” you begged, feeling desperate.

"Anything?" Heeseung quickly averted his attention to you, dropping his book slightly to make eye contact with you.

"Yes, anything. I’ll do anything," you replied, hoping he would accept it.

"Then introduce me to her," Heeseung answered. You looked confused.

"Who's her?" you raised your eyebrow.

Heeseung’s cheek slightly blushed, it was the first time you saw him so embarrassed. “Karina,” he mumbled under his breath. Suddenly it clicked—he was interested in Karina, your best friend.

You gave an eager look, “Deal! I’ll introduce you to her after all of the fake dating.” You pulled out your hand.

"Deal," Heeseung replied, shaking your hand.

A  FEW DAYS LATER, YOU FIND YOURSELF in the convenience store, an unexpected place for someone like you—a popular girl to be at. Your outfit was simpler than usual, baggy gray sweats and a white tank top, with your hair thrown up in a messy high ponytail and an oversized jacket completing the look.

You scan the snack aisle, contemplating your choices, when the doorbell chimes, signaling a customer had entered. Your heart thumps as you recognize the last person you expected to encounter—Heeseung. He's dressed in simple gray sweatpants and a black hoodie, his messy hair somehow adding to his charm.

Your eyes lock momentarily before you both awkwardly shuffle towards each other. "What brings you here?" you ask, surprised to find him in a convenience store at 2 am.

"Why are you up so late?" he counters, swiftly turning the interrogation on you.

"I couldn't sleep. What's your excuse?" you reply.

"Studying," he responds matter-of-factly, grabbing an energy drink before swiftly checking out and leaving. You hurry after him, catching up as he strides down the street.

"Studying late? That's a first," you mutter to yourself, gazing up at the night sky.

"I don’t want to flunk my classes, unlike you," he retorts, avoiding your gaze.

"I'm not that hopeless," you roll your eyes.

"Yeah, you are," he quips, taking a sip of his drink.

"Hey!" you playfully threaten, pulling back your arm as if to hit him. But then something unexpected happens—you catch sight of Heeseung's smile, genuine and endearing. You quickly shake off any wayward thoughts; after all, you're just his so-called “girlfriend”.

"Where do you live?" you inquire, trying to change the subject.

"Stalker much?" Heeseung teases.

"Shut up," you retort, rolling your eyes.

"I live in the house near the college," he answers, disposing of his empty can.

"Do you walk to school?" you ask, trying to prolong the conversation.

"Yeah," he replies.

"Then... do you want to walk together tomorrow?" you suggest, stopping in the quiet and empty streets.

"Walk together?" he repeats, surprised.

You nod and quickly add, "Yeah, you know, for you know..."

Heeseung considers for a moment before agreeing, "Sure."

"Great! I'll come by your place at 7 am since school starts at 7:30!" you smile, remembering to ask for his number. He inserts it into your phone, adding, "Don't blow up my phone."

"I'm not that obsessed with you," you retort.

"I think you are," he jokes.

"In your dreams," you shoot back.

YOU FOUND YOURSELF STANDING OUTSIDE Heeseung's door, feeling an awkward knot tighten in your stomach as you waited, fingers fidgeting nervously. After what seemed like hours, the door swung open to reveal a woman, likely Heeseung's mother.

"Hi, who are you?" she inquired, her eyes curious but welcoming.

"I'm YN LN," you replied, managing a warm smile despite your nerves. "A friend of Heeseung's."

"Heeseung's friend?" Her expression softened into a delighted grin. "I didn't realize Heeseung had such a pretty friend. I'm Heeseung's mother. Just call me Mrs. Lee."

"Mom..." Heeseung's voice interrupted, his presence suddenly beside you as he quickly shuffled to put on his shoes.

"Heeseung, she seems like a sweet and pretty girl," Mrs. Lee remarked before Heeseung darted, closing the door behind him before his mother could say anything else.

"Your mother seems really nice," you commented, attempting to ease the tension.

"Mhm," Heeseung mumbled, his attention already diverted to his book that he quickly pulled out from his backpack. 

With a pointed look, you reached out your hand, silently urging him to remember.

Heeseung sighed, rolling his eyes in mild exasperation, but he relented, tucking the book away and clasping your hand in his. The touch sent a jolt through you, a feeling you couldn't quite grasp.

"So..." you began, eager to break the silence. "Where's your class?"

"Class 3-B," he replied shortly, his gaze fixed ahead as if unwilling to meet your eyes.

"Mine's right next door." you exclaimed, hoping to inject some enthusiasm into the conversation. "Perfect! Do you know what this means?"

"What?" Heeseung's response was clipped, his tone guarded.

"That I can come over to your class during lunch!" you declared with a wide grin, trying to lighten the mood.

"I eat on the rooftop, alone." he added, emphasizing the word alone.

"Ah, I forget you’re a loner," you teased gently.

"At least I'm productive with my free time," he retorted.

"Well, today we're together!" you suggested brightly and then with a smirk you whispered, "And I can introduce you to... Karina." The mention of your best friend's name made Heeseung blush slightly.

"Shut up," he groaned, moving to cover your mouth with his free hand just in case you would say anything else.

"Like I want to-" feeling a sudden hard squeeze in your hand "Ow..."

"Now shut up before I squeeze harder," Heeseung warned, though there was a hint of genuine threat in his tone.

"You're no fun," you muttered. Eventually, you arrived at the school, fingers still intertwined as you drew curious whispers from the hallway.

"YN and Heeseung, dating? No way..." you heard a girl whisper by the lockers, causing a flush of embarrassment to color your cheeks. When you reached Heeseung's classroom, you reluctantly released his hand, noticing the tension in his posture as he leaned against the doorframe.

"See you later?" you asked, "I'll be on the rooftop during break."

"Alright..." Heeseung's response was hesitant, but then came an unexpected word that caught you off guard. "...baby." The pet name hung in the air.

"R-right... anyway, bye..." you stammered, feeling a rush of different emotions. You'd been in relationships before, but you were never so flustered for such small things like that. Could it be... you weren't falling for him, right?

HEESEUNG SETTLED AT THE EMPTY TABLE on the rooftop, his gaze drifting across the school grounds. The rooftop held a special meaning for him, offering a quiet place to read, barely visited by others.

“Heeseung!” Your voice sliced through the silence, drawing his attention. He glanced up to see you approaching, two lunches in hand.

With a bright grin, you placed the meals in front of him. “I brought lunch!”

"Thanks," Heeseung replied , his tone cool as he examined the homemade kimbap. As you both sat down, awkwardness settled between you, by the avoidance of eye contact.

Summoning his courage, Heeseung brought a question that had lingered in his mind for months. "Why did you like Choi Jiho?"

Your eyes widened at the unexpected, catching you off guard. You paused, hesitating with how to respond.Memories of Jiho flooded your mind. You had forgotten about him for the past 4 days due to Heeseung being on your mind 24/7.

You cleared your throat, summoning a bitter lie to your lips. "I... uh, he was nice, I guess."

"Did Jiho even like you back?" Heeseung's question cut through the air. That’s when you realized something. You remembered the way Jiho would never defend you in any moment or barely spend time with you. And the time when he did? He would always be on his phone. You realized how stupid you were as you thought the moments where he just wanted attention from the public by kissing you or flirting with you meant that he loved you. 

"I... I don't know," you admitted. Deep down, you knew the painful reality—that Jiho had used you.

"Oh, okay..." Heeseung responded, sensing the weight of your words. "So, let's change the top—"

"I know he didn't like me," you interjected, your gaze drifting to the sky before meeting Heeseung's gaze. "I know he was the worst boyfriend I could ask for."

Confusion flickered across Heeseung's features at your sudden confession.

"I was blind. I regret it," you murmured, your gaze falling to your lap. "But it's in the past."

Heeseung regarded you with his usual stern and cold look. "Then why did you tell Jiho you were meeting someone else?"

"Because... I wanted to prove I was happier now," you muttered, grappling with your tumultuous emotions.

"Are you?" Heeseung's gaze bore into yours.

"I... I think I am," you replied

"You 'think'?" Heeseung pressed, his tone firm.

"I'm happier than before," you insisted, though the vagueness of your answer hung in the air.

"That's not specific," Heeseung challenged.

"I can't be specific," you confessed, frustration simmering beneath the surface. "Because I don't know, at all."

"Are you sure?" Heeseung persisted.

"Heeseung, it's my feelings, yes I'm sure," you asserted.

"I'm just physically and mentally curious, so it allured me to—" Heeseung began, but you cut him off.

"Okay, I think that's enough. The bell's going to ring soon. Text me later!" With that, you rose abruptly, snatching your lunch bag and offering a quick wave before descending the stairs back to class.

HEESEUNG LAY ON  HIS BED,  staring up at the ceiling. He knew he should be studying, but your words about Jiho lingered in his mind. "I'm happier than before." Why was he even pondering such things? Lost in thought, he was jolted back to reality by a faint buzz from his phone. Retrieving it, he found a message from you.

YN LN: heeseung!! all my friends rejected me to go to the mall TT, so wanna go together?? ><

Heeseung paused, a moment of surprise flashing across his features. You were asking him to go to the mall with you? It felt almost like you were asking him out. He composed himself and replied:

Heeseung: Sure. Send location and time, I’ll be there.

Putting down his phone, he realized the weight of his agreement. He had just agreed to go on a date with you. And now, he needed to get ready. Hastily, he rummaged through his closet, seeking out a suitable outfit. Opting for his lone stylish varsity jacket paired with jeans, he ran his fingers through his hair in an attempt to tidy it up.

Rushing to the mall, he found you leaning against a store wall, your attention fixed on your phone. As he approached, a cupid seemed to strike him with an arrow as his cheeks flushed. The simplicity of your outfit and the gentle cascade of your hair rendered you utterly captivating.

You looked up, catching sight of Heeseung's slightly stunned expression, and greeted him with a warm smile, gesturing for him to join you.

"Hi," Heeseung muttered, still awestruck by your beauty.

"Hi!" you returned the greeting with equal warmth. "I just need to buy some makeup for my friends, or maybe myself, and possibly shop around! Anything you need?"

"Not necessarily," Heeseung replied, scanning the mall.

"Okay then, follow me," you said, seizing his arm and leading him to the nearest makeup store. Arriving at the lip product section, you perused the selection of lipsticks, lip glosses, and lip tints. Grabbing a random lip tint, you turned to Heeseung.

"Can I try it on you? I need to see if it looks good on a person," you suggested.

"What? When did I sign up for this?" Heeseung sighed.

"Please," you pleaded, giving him your best pout. "I can erase it right after."

"Fine."

With careful precision, you applied the tint to his lips. The warmth of his breath brushed against your cheeks and neck, sending a flurry of sensations through you. Your heart raced as you admired his perfectly shaped lips, now tinted with color. After smoothing out any unevenness, you stepped back to admire the look.

"Hmm... I think this works," you concluded, grabbing the new tint to go check out and pay for it.

YOU SAVORED THE SWEET TASTE OF vanilla ice cream as you took a bite, sitting side by side with Heeseung on the bench outside the convenient store where you first met. He listened attentively as you shared stories about your friends and family.

"And then Giselle told me—" Your sentence was cut short as Heeseung's fingers delicately wiped a smudge of ice cream from the corner of your lips.

"Mhm?" He hummed softly, encouraging you to continue. Your heart fluttered at his touch, beating rapidly in your chest.

"...y-yeah," you stammered, trying to regain your composure, your gaze drifting to the hues of the sunset painting the sky in shades of blue and orange.

"Are you done with your story?" Heeseung inquired, to which you nodded hastily. You weren't finished, but another word might turn you into a flustered mess.

After a brief silence, you suggested, "How about we go for a walk by the Han River?" Heeseung agreed with a nod, and soon you found yourselves strolling side by side along the riverbank, the gentle sound of water trickling in the background adding to the peaceful atmosphere.

Unexpectedly, Heeseung asked, "Are you going to the dance?" It was a question he wouldn't normally ask.

"The dance?" you raised an eyebrow, caught off guard by his inquiry.

"Yeah, the school dance?" Heeseung clarified, his expression tinged with skepticism.

"Oh, well, yeah," you replied, feeling a pang of disappointment as you remembered his feelings for Karina. He didn't like you, so why did you allow yourself to hope for something more?

"Is Karina going?" Heeseung continued, and you struggled to find your voice, your throat suddenly dry.

"O-oh, uhm, I think she's going..." you managed to say, the reality of your situation crashing down on you like a wave. Foolish fantasies had consumed you for the past five days, but now you bit your lip to stave off the embarrassment and tears threatening to surface.

"I think I'm tired. I'm gonna go home now. Bye, Heeseung," you forced a small smile before turning away, walking in the opposite direction. Heeseung watched you go, a confused expression clouding his features as you moved farther and farther away.

LEANING AGAINST THE WALL, you found yourself lost in thoughts of Heeseung, the person who was on your mind day in and day out. Why did it bother you so much if he had feelings for your best friend, Karina? Why did his presence hold such sway over you?

"YN?" Winter's voice broke through your trail of thoughts,snapping you back to reality.

"Oh, sorry, I was zoning out," you replied, trying to shake off the distraction.

"You've been distant all day. Is everything okay?" Ningning's concern was evident in her voice.

"Just tired, didn't get much sleep last night," you reassured them with a forced smile, hoping they wouldn't press further.

"Are you sure?" Giselle's skepticism lingered, her gaze searching yours.

"It's nothing, just life being complicated," you offered, trying to reassure their worries.

"If you need to talk, we're here for you," Karina chimed in, her comforting touch on your hands a familiar gesture she usually did. How you longed to confess and tell them about Heeseung and the jumble of emotions you felt and fought with, but the fear of ruining your relationships with both him and Karina kept you quiet.

At that moment, it came to you: you were in love with Heeseung. It had to be a mistake right? You could never like someone like Heeseung.  The way your heart thumped when Heeseung did small actions like hold your hand or even wipe off anything from your mouth.

 Yet, you couldn't shake the fear, the fear of history repeating itself with someone like Jiho, selfish and foolish. What was the point of falling for someone who didn't accept your feelings and liked someone else

HEESEUNG HAD REHEARSED EVERY WORD, every breath, for the moment he would finally summon the courage to ask you out for dinner. With trembling fingers, he reached for his phone, his thumb hovering over the call button. The weight of his nerves pressed down on him as he prepared to take the risk.

As the phone rang, his heart raced, the sound of your voice on the other end sending a jumble of emotions through him "Hello?" you answered, your voice like music and beauty to his ears.

"Hi..." Heeseung replied, his voice betraying his unease.

"Why did you call me?" you asked, curiosity tinged but yet your voice sounded heavy and drained. Heeseung couldn't help but notice the change in your tone for the past days, wondering if he had somehow caused it. Had he done something wrong? 

"I was just wondering if... uhm... you wanted to go get dinner tonight together?" Heeseung's voice faltered slightly, the weight of his question hanging in the air.

"Dinner tonight?" Your voice held a hint of confusion, but there was also a spark of interest. "When and where?" you inquired.

"At the Japanese place down the block, at 6?" Heeseung suggested, hoping you would agree.

"Sure, I'll see you at 6 then," you replied, your voice brightening slightly.

"Right, anyways, bye!" Heeseung quickly ended the call, a rush of happiness coursing through him. He had done it. He asked you out for dinner.

With a sense of pride, Heeseung flopped onto his bed, his phone resting on his chest as. a wide grin spread across his face. He replayed the conversation in his mind, excited for the evening of day. 

Meanwhile, on the other end of the line, you couldn't contain your excitement. Heeseung. Lee Heeseung. had. Asked. you. out. to. dinner. You, YN LN.  You couldn't help but squeal with delight into your pillow.

Eager to make a good impression, you jumped out of bed and rushed to your closet, rummaging through your clothes in search of the perfect outfit for the occasion. 

HEESEUNG SAT NERVOUSLY, tapping the table as he waited for you to arrive. Within minutes, you rushed in and quickly spotted him.

"Hi!" you greeted with a smile, settling down at the table.

"Hi," he smiled back (inside you felt a flutter at how cute his smile was). You both looked at the menu and ordered as the waiter approached. After eating, you quietly walked outside, enjoying the cool evening air.

The dark, cloudless sky revealed a glimmering array of stars. You admired the view, unaware that Heeseung was watching you, captivated by your beauty.

"The stars are so pretty," you remarked in awe.

"Mhm," he replied, still focused on you. Suddenly, you felt his fingers gently tuck a stray hair behind your ear. Your face flushed as butterflies fluttered in your stomach.

"I have a question, YN..." Heeseung began, and you turned to him, curious.

"Do you... want to go to the dance?" he asked. Your heart raced, your stomach churned, and your head spun. He had just asked you to the dance.

"T-the dance?" you stuttered.

"Yeah... I mean, just as... you know, for visual purposes," he tried to clarify.

"Right..." you nodded, agreeing. "I'll go with you." Heeseung's face lit up with a big grin as you accepted his invitation.

"That's great! I'll, um... see you at the dance then," Heeseung said with a small smile and a wave as you both went your separate ways, heading home with a light heart.

As you walked home, your mind buzzed with excitement. The thought of going to the dance with Heeseung made your heart skip a beat. You couldn't help but replay the moment he asked you, feeling a rush of happiness each time. It was like a dream come true, and you couldn't wait for the night of the dance to arrive.

WEEKS FLEW BY, each one filled with anticipation, excitement, and a series of dates. Finally, the much-anticipated day of the dance had arrived. It had been six weeks since you eagerly marked this date on your calendar. Reflecting on the past four months since you met Heeseung, you knew deep down that you were head over heels in love with him. The moment he asked you to the dance, those feelings intensified.

"Do you think this dress is pretty enough?" you asked, twirling in your knee-length black dress adorned with delicate lace details, a sweetheart neckline, and spaghetti straps.  The dress hugged your figure perfectly.

"It's gorgeous," Ningning complimented, deftly assisting with your hair.

"It's perfect, just like you," Winter reassured, adjusting your dress with care.

"Easy for you to say, with Beomgyu as your date," you teased, prompting laughter from your friends.

"And you have Heeseung," Winter smiled, smoothing out the fabric of your dress.

"You two are so cute together," Giselle teased, earning a blush from you.

"I love you guys," you said, feeling grateful for their support as you shared a group hug.

"Even if I'm dating a man, you'll always be my number one," Winter jokes, lightening the mood as you head to Karina's car.

Upon arriving at the dance, the lively atmosphere was perfect. Laughter, music, and chatter filled the room as people talked, danced, and enjoyed themselves. Spotting Heeseung entering the room, you felt a rush of excitement.

He looked perfect in his suit, his hair perfectly styled. Rushing over to him, you greeted him with a beaming smile.

"Heeseung!" you exclaimed. Heeseung looked up, his eyes lighting up at the sight of you. I

"You look amazing, YN," Heeseung complimented, his smile genuine.

"Thanks, but you're the one who looks stunning," you replied, feeling your heart flutter as you took in his appearance. "Come on, let's grab some snacks and go have fun!"

The next two hours were filled with laughter, dancing, and cherished moments spent with Heeseung and your friends. However, it was until you excused yourself to the bathroom, to then meet Jiho.

"YN," Jiho's voice cut through the noise, sending a chill down your spine.

"What do you want, Jiho?" you asked, your tone laced with irritation.

"Are you here with your 'so-called' boyfriend, Heeseung?" Jiho taunted, a smirk playing on his lips.

"Yes, and what's it to you?" you retorted, your patience wearing thin.

“Yeah there is.” his smirk widened, “Don’t act stupid, I knew everything.” 

“God I hate you Jiho.”  you spat, feeling your anger rise.

"Come on, YN. Admit you still love me, and everything will go back to normal," Jiho sneered.

“I don’t even like you anymore, Jiho.”  you said firmly, trying to keep your composure.

"Oh, really? Maybe this will change your mind," Jiho said, leaning in closer. You felt his fingers slip into your waist, his grip firm and tight. You felt his face leaning closer to yours. You quickly stepped back and pushed him aside. 

“Are you fucking crazy?” you yelled. 

“YN, why are you so pissed? Not like you like anyone.”  Jiho's eyes bore into yours, a smirk playing on his lips.

“I don’t want to fucking kiss you,” you glared, “Now fuck off please.” 

“Why is it because of Heeseung? Your fake boyfriend? God, he probably doesn’t even like you YN. He only likes you because you're popular.” he laughed. Your heart sank at his cruel words. The words stung as you heard each word. Heeseung was just a stupid fake boyfriend you had. The two of you had never had a real relationship. A real love. Was Heeseung just playing with your feelings? Did Heeseung even love you like how much you loved him? 

"I hate you, Jiho," you whispered before leaving the party alone, your heart felt heavy. 

YOU SPENT HOURS lying in bed, staring out the rain-splattered window, your cheeks damp from the relentless stream of tears. Days had passed since the dance, and you hadn't mustered the strength to leave the confines of your home. 

"YN, you've been here for hours," Karina's voice broke through the silence, her concern evident as she entered your room. 

"Why didn't you text me?" 

"Phone died," you muttered, burying your face deeper into the sheets.

"Tell me what's wrong," Karina urged gently, taking a seat beside you. 

"I don't know," you confessed, your voice barely audible. 

"Come on," Karina coaxed, her comforting presence offering a glimmer of solace. 

"Okay, fine," you relented, the words tumbling out in a rush. "Jiho said some awful things to me at the dance. Now I'm a wreck, and I can't face Heeseung. I'm in love with him, and it's tearing me apart." 

Karina's eyes widened at the torrent of emotions pouring out. "And you kept this from me all this time?" 

"Karina, I didn't know what to do," you admitted, your voice choking with emotion. "I thought Heeseung felt the same way, but then Jiho made me doubt everything."

"How does Jiho know anything? He's not Heeseung," Karina retorted, frustration evident in her tone. "He's just trying to mess with your head." 

"But what if he's right? What if Heeseung was just pretending all along?" you sighed, a heavy weight settling in your chest. 

"YN," Karina's voice softened, her touch gentle as she sought to comfort you. "How do you know Heeseung doesn't like you? Have you talked to him?" 

"I haven't," you admitted, uncertainty clouding your thoughts.

"Then how can you be so sure?" Karina questioned, her eyes searching yours. "Heeseung cares about you, YN. He was worried sick after the dance. He searched everywhere for you and even left the party early out of concern."

"Are you serious?" you asked, a glimmer of hope flickering in your eyes. 

"Dead serious," Karina affirmed, her sincerity unwavering. "Talk to him, YN. You'll see." 

"But what if I'm wrong?" you hesitated, your fear holding you back. "Just trust me on this," Karina reassured, squeezing your hand gently. "Talk to Heeseung. You'll thank me later." Karina offered you a reassuring smile before enveloping you in an embrace.

HEESEUNG WAS SERIOUSLY DEAD WORRIED about you. He thought you were possibly hit by some car or even worse kidnapped. His thoughts wandered as he tried to think of all the possibilities you were. You stopped even coming to school for weeks.

The memory of the dance replayed in his mind like a broken record, haunting him with unanswered questions. Your sudden disappearance after excusing yourself to the bathroom left him questionable and restless. Desperately, he asked your friends as your friends only left him shrugs and quietness making him uneasy of the situation.

When you finally returned after a week-long absence, Heeseung couldn't help but notice the change in you. You awfully looked tired and you had eyebags. And the most important change, you were avoiding Heeseung. Was it something he had done to mess things up?

Heeseung sat at his usual spot on the rooftop, gazing out at the view, trying to get his thoughts out.

"Look who it is, Lee Heeseung," a voice pierced through the silence, pulling Heeseung from his reverie. Turning, he found Jiho leaning casually against the stairway exit, a smirk playing on his lips.

"Heeseung's girlfriend, huh?" Jiho taunted, his words hitting Heeseung like a sudden blow.

"What did you do to YN?" Heeseung's voice was edged with a mixture of anger and concern, his gaze sharp.

"Nothing much, just a little truth-telling," Jiho chuckled, his demeanor full of arrogance. 

"What truth?" Heeseung's tone was laced with urgency, his fists clenched in frustration.

“Just a few things that need to be said. Like how you guys are just dating, nothing more than that.”

Heeseung's jaw tightened as the weight of Jiho's words settled in, his mind reeling with disbelief and anger.

"Do you even know why YN hates you?" Heeseung spat, his voice seething with contempt.

"Why don't you tell me?" Jiho's smirk widened.

"Cause you’re truly an awful person” Heeseung retorted, his patience wearing thin.

“Oh really?” Jiho teased, “I didn’t know.”

Jiho's mocking laughter only fueled Heeseung's rage, his frustration exploding into action as he delivered a swift punch to Jiho's jaw.

"You're really undeserving of her," Heeseung's words echoed in the empty space.

“You could punch me as many times, I don’t care.” Jiho smiled. 

“I would but actually I don’t want to see your ugly face, so fuck off.” Heeseung stormed out of the rooftop leaving Jiho alone on the ground.

IT WAS 1 AM WHEN YOU FOUND YOURSELF at the convenience store, clad in your most comfortable clothes, not even caring if people saw you. The rush of cold air from the conditioner greeted you as you stepped inside, scanning the assortment of snacks. The scent of sweet delights filled your senses, tempting you to buy more. You reached for a snack when the chime of the door signaled someone's arrival.

Looking up, you were met with the sight of Heeseung standing across the store, his gaze fixed on you. It felt like deja vu, reminiscent of the first time you laid eyes on him. Your throat went dry, memories of Jiho's words echoing in your mind: "He probably doesn’t even like you." Anxious, you bit your lip as Heeseung approached.

"Can we talk outside?" Heeseung's voice broke through the tension. With a quiet nod, you followed him out of the store.

"YN, what's going on?" Heeseung's concern was evident as he confronted you, hoping you would answer honestly.

"Heeseung, it's nothing," you lied

"It's not nothing," Heeseung persisted, his tone firm.

"Okay, fine, I'll tell you. I fell in love with you, but then Jiho made me doubt everything. I thought you probably didn’t even like me, maybe you liked Karina instead. What was the point of being with you if I'm only going to hurt myself?" The words spilled out in a rush, leaving you empty.. Heeseung froze at your confession, disbelief in his expression.

"You like me?" Heeseung's eyebrow arched in surprise.

"I know you don't like me—" Before you could finish, Heeseung silenced you with a soft kiss. His lips were soft and perfect.You felt his fingers sliding into your waist, pulling you closer to deepen the kiss. Your lips were moving in sync, in the same passion, kissing each other back. You felt his fingers intertwined with yours, drawing soft circles on the back of your hand.

Pulling away, breathless, you attempted to speak, but Heeseung beat you to it. "I like you a lot, YN. I was in denial of my feelings for months, but I realized I was actually in love with you." You widen your eyes at his confession

"Heeseung, you're not lying, right?" suspicion tinged your words.

"Do you think I would ever lie to you?" Heeseung chuckled, tucking your hair behind your ear, a gesture that he would always done 

"No, but it all seems non-real," you confessed.

Heeseung's laughter, the sound you cherished the most, filled the air. "Then, will you be my real girlfriend, YN LN?"

"Of course, any day I'll choose you," you smiled, leaning in for another kiss. 

MONTHS HAD PASSED and you found yourself in a state of bliss you never imagined possible. Seated on the rooftop with Heeseung, your fingers intertwined, you gazed out into the view before you, the cool breeze enveloping you in a sense of serenity.

"Look how far we've come," you remarked, a smile gracing your lips as you watched Heeseung absentmindedly draw small patterns on your palm.

"Yeah," Heeseung nodded, his touch gentle and comforting.

"I love you, Heeseung," you whispered softly, your words carrying the weight of your affection.

"I love you more," Heeseung replied in a tender whisper, his warm breath tickling the sensitive skin of your neck as he leaned in to press a series of delicate kisses along its curve.

"Heeseung, that tickles!" you laughed, squirming slightly at the sensation.

"This is your punishment for getting a 60% on the exam," Heeseung teased, his tone playful yet teasing.

"Hey, I'm not some nerd like you!" you retorted, playfully poking his side.

"Nerd?" Heeseung chuckled, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

"A cute nerd," you amended with a grin, your heart swelling with affection.

"And you're my cute princess," Heeseung declared, pressing a sweet and tender kiss to your lips, his love for you shining brightly in his eyes. You truly were in love with Heeseung, and you weren’t going to deny it.