#maybe i'll get some writing done this week i've got some free time coming up

[ragnarokhound]

🖊️& 🏅for the ask game? 💞

:D 💕I've been in a bit of a slump this month haha, so it was nice to reflect on something positive about my writing ^^;

🏅 What is something you recently felt proud of in regard to your writing (finished a fic, actually planned for once, etc).:

I'm really proud of how the structure for my AOB fic has come together! Once I finally write the dang scenes, I think it's going to be pretty good even if it wasn't supposed to be something I thought this hard about lmao OTL i am consistently cursed with think too hard disease :')

I'm also really pleased with a scene that wrote just yesterday, I think it'll fit into the werewolf fic that i've been super blocked on and has injected some new life into my ideas for that fic - and I'm really happy to get literally any traction on that :'D

🖊️ post a snippet from a current WIP:

From the AOB fic that I sWEaR i'LL fiNiSH:

“Tim, you two have a movie night— a date night— that no one else is invited to.”

“Everyone else talks too much,” Tim starts to explain, before he realizes what he's saying. “But that’s beside the— it’s not a date night we just hang out after patrol sometimes. I don’t even like TV.”

Dick makes an incoherent sound, a distinctly alpha growl and a whine that puts Tim’s hackles up. He rubs his hand over his mouth, clearly thinking. His eyes snap back to Tim’s and he has to resist the urge to flinch.

Dick maintains eye contact with him as he starts stripping off his suit jacket. He aggressively shoves it at Tim, ignoring his protests and manhandling it around his shoulders when he doesn't immediately take the hint. 

"What the hell are you doing?" Tim hisses as Dick scents him, roughly scrubbing his wrist on Tim's cheeks, leaving a strong residue of playful-exasperated-I win. Dick has always been casual about scenting, but this is a little much, even for him.

"Don't believe me? Watch. When he comes back, he's gonna find any excuse to get you out of my clothes and into his."

This is some prime alpha bullshit that Tim did not sign up for tonight. He sputters, and can feel his cheeks getting red and blotchy. "Wh— Dick!"

"And he'll try to clean your face."

"That's dumb. You're dumb."

"I'll bet you my share of Alfred's baklava."

"Bet," Tim snarls, though he's suddenly apprehensive. Alfred's baklava is practically sacred.

But he can admit, the idea of testing Jason's reaction has his curiosity piqued.

Damn. Dick knows him too well.

[reiderwriter]

hii I absolutely love your writing!! I was wondering if you could write a one shot with gun kink? maybe not really something *aggressive* but just gun kink in the plot !! and please smut with no angst, also maybe aftercare in the end? it's totally okay if you're not comfortable. im loving your kinktober one shots! have a good day :)

A/N: This being one of like... three gun kink requests I've received, we are all not seeing the pearly gates lmao. If you enjoy reading this, even 50% of how much I enjoyed writing it, then I'm happy 😚

Warnings: Undercover FBI Agent reader, gun kink, interrogation room sex, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, creampie, some BDSM themes, Spencer has to 'rough up' the reader etc.

Masterlist

Being rough-housed by a group of FBI agents and pushed against a wall before being handcuffed was never your idea of a fun Tuesday night. It wasn't exactly high on the list for any night of the week, really, but here you were. 

“Caitlyn Grant? You're under arrest for being an accessory to a felony and evading law enforcement, whatever you say…” You drowned out the rest of the statement. It was nothing you didn't have memorized. 

“You're not the usual drug crew, and you don't look sturdy enough to be on most of the other teams either. What part of the Bureau are you in?” You asked the lanky man currently pinning you to the wall as he made sure your handcuffs were aptly tight. 

“You have the right to an attorney, if you can't afford one-” 

“I waive my rights. It's not human trafficking. You wouldn't be working this case if you were human trafficking.” 

The man just stared at you in vague disapproval as you grinned back at him. His closeness meant you could see every detail of his face up close, the five o'clock shadow, the dark circles from lack of sleep. On most of the agents you'd encountered, it had the effect of making them look older, a little haggard, and depressed. On this man, it was honestly very hot. 

He started your pat down by spreading your legs, though honestly, if he'd asked nicely enough, you'd have done just that for him. You near enough told him just that as he reached the two pockets on the ass of your jeans. 

“Watch it, Agent, my bite is worse than my bark.” 

“Turn around.” 

You pouted at his solid resolve, wondering what it would take to get the man to crack a smile or even a frown. Something that wasn't just disinterest slapped on a face and called a day. 

You did as he asked, making sure your body pressed nicely up against his the entire way until your shoulders were resting on the wall and he was feeling along your waist. 

“Come on, what kind of weapon are you going to find there?”

“Standard protocol, please let me do my job.”

“Standard protocol is calling one of your female agents over here to maintain the boundary, Agent. This feels more like you're just trying to cop a feel.” 

Those words finally got a reaction. The subtle clench of the jaw as his hands tightened slightly on your waist had you suddenly regretting your decision to be put in handcuffs. Your hands should've been free to tuck the stray lock of hair that had fallen in his eyes behind his ear, free so your fingernails could trace a path down his face and neck and chest. 

His gaze landed on the simple silver chain you wore around your list and he delicately pulled it out of your shirt, careful not to touch you (and avoiding you even as you arched your back into him). 

With a quick tug, he pulled the necklace clean off your neck, not pausing to bother with the clasp at all. 

“Clever boy. I'll see you in the interrogation room, shall I?” He said nothing as the female agents you'd mentioned earlier stationed themselves on either side of you as you walked away. You didn't break eye contact until the doors to the police van closed behind you. 

Six months undercover on a case, and this was the first time you'd stepped foot in a police precinct since you'd ditched your real name and life. 

The interrogation rooms hadn't changed in that time, at least, still grey and depressing. Time felt void as you waited for company, and thankfully, you weren't waiting long.

“Agent Y/N, sorry about the arrest, we wanted to make it look as real as possible while pulling you out.” The woman who greeted you obviously held the authority, and while you wanted to respect that, the sight of the man trailing behind her actually caught her full attention. 

“Pleasure to meet you….?” You let the question hang open for both of them but kept your gaze fully focused on the man, who stood himself next to the door, keeping surprisingly quiet. 

“I'm Unit Chief Emily Prentiss, this is Doctor Spencer Reid, we're from the-” 

“Behavioural Analysis Unit, of course. I was close, you know, earlier. A face like yours wouldn't last five minutes in cartel land. I almost guessed cyber, but you looked a bit too bookish. Doctor Reid, hmm.” 

“This interview is taking place with Agent Prentiss. Please direct all your questions to her.”

“Oh shit, sorry, where are my manners. I didn't mean to disrespect you like that, Agent Prentiss. It's just been a long few months.”

The other woman just chuckled and shook her head, leafing through some documents to pass you over the information on the case they needed assistance on. 

“We think there's a serial killer in the drug ring you infiltrated,” the woman explained, passing over the files with the case details. You took a moment's breath before opening to the crime scene photos, steeling yourself for what you might encounter. 

“There are probably a lot of serials in the organization. It's a drug ring. What makes this one worse?” You said, just as you flipped the file open and answered your own question. 

“Shit- Okay, that's what makes this one worse. He can't be more than 15, right?” 

The answering grimace on the two agents' faces suggested you'd been generous in your estimate. “Okay, how can I help?” 

xxxxx 

A few hours passed in the interrogation room, and you'd walked them through all of your up to date information on your case and cover. The chair wasn't exactly comfortable, but you were glad to be finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. The interview was ending, and you could see an end to your undercover work swiftly following too with the BAU's assistance. 

You weren't looking forward to having to acclimatize back into the real world. You'd gone from pushing papers at a desk 9 hours a day to rubbing shoulders with drug dealers and junkies, a lot of whom were kids, young people like you who had no other options than the streets and crime. 

You made a mental note to give a few warnings to the younger kids on the streets to stay alert and then started getting back into character. 

“Thanks again for your help, Agent. We appreciate your time.” Prentiss nodded at you as she gathered the folders, getting ready to leave. 

Spencer Reid stood, too, stretching himself out as he rose from the chair, giving you quite the show as your eyes dragged from his face, down his chest and down further still as you appreciated the view. 

The last few hours had been strictly professional, and you'd enjoyed bouncing ideas off of him, running through theories. Now, trying to get back into your ‘lusty barmaid’ persona, you thought instead about how much you'd like to bounce on him yourself, possibly while running your hands through his hair. 

A girl could dream. 

“Hold on a second, I'm still in cover, I can't go back out there looking this pristine, it's too suspicious,” you said, the two agents turning back to you curiously. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Someone needs to throw me around a little. Rough housing, you know, a few bruises will do it.” 

Prentiss looked at you, caught halfway between impressed and amused. The good Doctor however seemed to darken slightly, covering his shock with a tensed jaw. 

“She's all yours, Spencer,” Wmily winked at the man, turning the door handle and beginning her exit.

“What? Why?” 

“I don't hit women.” 

“And I do? Emily, wha-” 

But the door to the interrogation room has already closed with a small cackle, and you're already being drawn closer to the man like a moth to a flame. 

Turning to face you, you see the shock of the situation on his face before he looks away in a flash, refusing to meet your eyes as he keeps himself close to the door. 

“Doctor Reid, I'm not actually a criminal, you know?” 

“I thought you wanted one of us to treat you like a criminal now.” 

“You make a good point, shall we begin?” 

He signed and rubbed his temples as you advanced, letting you get a little bit closer before holding his hands up in surrender. 

“Wait, wait, tell me first, what should we be doing?” 

You took a deep breath and expelled it, then took the time to think about it. 

You would need some visible marks of the FBI's unkindness - wrists red, a bruise or two on your knees, maybe, from falling. The problem was, you couldn't think about how to get the marks without driving yourself insane. 

There was a quick and easy way to get tender knees, an even easier way to mark up your neck and chest, but you couldn't figure out how to ask Spencer Reid to do those things without spreading your legs and letting him do whatever he wanted. You weren't sure you wouldn't do that eventually, anyway.

“Let's start with my wrists. You were too generous with the handcuffs earlier - just grab them really tight, pin me against the wall if it helps.”

He nodded and took a hesitant step towards you, thinking for a second, before grabbing one wrist and spinning you around. Before you could even process the action, he had you pinned, chest against the wall, arms above your head. 

“Is that okay?” He asked, his grip tight  but not bruising yet. 

“A little tighter, I want the marks to last a while. Why is my face against the wall?” 

He gripped tighter, the pain sending a jolt through your wrists that trailed all the way down to pool between your thighs. 

“I thought you'd be less uncomfortable like this.” 

“With your dick pushed up against my ass? Yes, Doctor, great decision.” 

He let out a cold, quick laugh, leaving you flushed as he pushed your upper body into the wall, too, finally getting to the grip strength he needed to get attention. 

“I'm sorry to disappoint, Y/N, but that's my gun,” the words whispered in your ear were the last straw as you shuddered in his grasp, his hands releasing your wrists as he stepped back a little. 

You shook out your hands a little, trying to momentarily relive the stiffness in your joints. 

He took a few paces to the desk and upholstered his weapon, placing it on the desk before joining you again. 

“So you don't get confused again,” he explained at seeing your raised eyebrow. 

“Oh so next time, it will be your dick?” You whispered, moving back to the desk and sitting yourself on the edge or it, picking up the gun and studying it for a few minutes. 

“Y/N, put it down.” 

“Ooh, possessive, are we?” You giggled, aiming it at him for a second before grabbing it by the barrel and holding it back out for him to grab. 

“Hold it, point it at me or whatever. Maybe it'll help you rough me up.” 

His brow furrowed, but he grabbed it anyway, not immediately slipping it into the holster as he stepped forward. 

“What now?” He asked, and you shrugged. 

“Whatever feels natural. And looks visible, I guess.”

It took him a few minutes to decide, surveying your body like it was a puzzle. Professionally, of course. You were about to speak up and urge him to get on with it when his hand shot out and wrapped around your throat. 

You tried to gasp, but the grip was firm, and boy, was it driving you crazy. Your legs had naturally parted as you sat yourself on the edge of the desk, and he walked into that space now, his free hand still holding the gun. 

Your body pushed forward into his, suddenly awash with arousal as your chest heaved with tiny breaths, lungs burning. 

“Are you enjoying this, Y/N? Or is it Caitlyn Grant that's enjoying this?” 

You felt the gun touch your thigh gently, and you moaned, just as he softened his grip on your throat. 

“Answer me, please. This is an interrogation room, after all.”

You met his eyes, checking to see how far he would take this, how far you could push back. 

“I'll admit, I'm not against mixing pain and pleasure.” 

His gaze flicked down, slowly pushing his gun up the skin of your thigh, raising your skirt with the barrel to catch a quick glimpse of your panties. 

“I can tell.” 

If it weren't for his grip on you, you'd have lunged for him right then and there. The cool metal against your thigh had you shuddering against him, growing wetter by the minute. 

“I read somewhere once that we can't pretend to be someone else without actually becoming them in some small way. You've been a cartel whore for six months, I wonder if this is a lasting effect.” 

He was so close now all he needed to do to close the gap was change the angle of his head, but he kept you in place with that gun, pointing up from your pussy, flush against your stomach. 

“I'll tell you a secret - the part of me that's aroused right now definitely predates this cover.” 

His lips drop to yours, tongue clashing with yours furiously as he grabs the back of your head to angle you better. 

Letting his hand drop back to your thigh, he gently coaxed you further open, skirt riding up. Putting down the gym momentarily, he pressed a wandering finger against your pantie-clad pussy, feeling your arousal before he used it to coat his fingers. 

A second later and the offending pair of underwear lay discarded on the floor. 

“Fuck, Spencer,” you said, gasping for breath as he again picked up the gun. 

“You wanted this so badly, didn't you? You've been needing someone to treat you like this for months now. It didn't even have to be me.” 

He traced circles on your thigh with the gun, and you twitched, years of training not letting you relax around the weapon and months of sexual frustration, making you desperate for something to touch you. 

“Yes, yes, please touch me.” 

The hand at your throat slid down to your chest and pushed gently  urging you to lie back and let him do whatever he wanted with you. The desk was cold - metal biting at your bare skin - and it only sent more shivers down your spine as he lowered himself to his knees and parted your legs for his tongue. 

The first touch was heaven, a state of bliss you'd been without in what felt like forever. His tongue danced across your folds as he tasted every inch of your exposed cunt, grip still strong on the gun pointed now to your chest, pinning you between the machine and the table. 

You tried to be as still as possible, to take the pleasure he gave calmly, but you couldn't. You writhed, moaned, chest heaving as you tried to hold off the first orgasm you'd achieved with someone else in probably a year.  

Like a man on a mission, Spencer Reid did not care. He gladly suffocated between your thighs as you squeezed them together, wrapping them around his head so you could keep feeling the insurmountable pleasure of his tongue on your pussy. 

“Spencer…Spencer, fuck-” you said as he finally pried your legs apart, lifting them just slightly so his tongue could reach further inside of you, curling with each wave of passion. Your hands fisted his hair, desperate for something to ground you to the moment as your pleasure spilt out of you, orgasm jolting through you in tiny sparks of pleasure. 

The gun moved first, coming level with your chest as you untangled your fingers from his hair. Spencer stood, wiping his face with the back of his hand as he kept the gun on you. 

“I think this turns you on even more. You've been ruined by this cover, Y/N, you're so used to being in danger that you can't even get off without someone threatening you.” 

You attempted to scoff, to brush off his words somehow, but his hand was suddenly back around your throat, picking you up off the desk and pulling you instead towards the room's one-way window. 

“Look at yourself,” he said, again twisting you around so you were pressed into the wall, wrists above your hair, raising your shirt to expose the cold skin underneath. He ran the barrel across the fresh skin, leaving a field of goosebumps along his path. 

“I don't think it would've mattered who came in to rough you up. I think you'd just as happily have convinced Emily to fuck your little pussy raw, right Y/N? As long as there was a gun…” 

Your moan was the only response as he used the weapon to spread your legs. You naturally arched your back and kept your hands in place as he holstered the weapon momentarily to unzip his pants and let his cock free. 

You couldn't see it, but you saw his reflection in the mirror as he slowly stretched you out with it, mouth dropping in a lustful ‘o’ as he fed his dick to you, hard and thick. 

As soon as it was in, the gun came back out, this time to rest against your temple. 

“Get yourself off,” his voice was so low it was practically a growl. “Use my cock, and pleasure yourself.” 

Your body listened immediately, beginning to move back and forth on his cock as he held himself in place. His moans and groans were all the encouragements you needed, the gun at your temple was just made the pleasure more profound as you approached your release. 

But he kept you pinned to the glass, your full range of motion limited, and you whimpered in frustration that you couldn't feel every inch of him. 

“If you need something, use your words, Agent.” 

“More, need more, please..please,” you gasped, breathing ragged. 

The hands at your wrists released, and he fisted a hand into the flesh at your hip, your wrists resting on the glass next to your face as he took over your thrusting. 

“Can't even do this anymore, what a spoiled little whore,” he said as his hips began snapping into you, reaching that spot deep inside you as you drooled against the glass, wondering if anyone had just happened to step into that room and what they must think about you. 

“Cum for me, Y/N. Cum on my cock,” he said it, and entranced, your body did just that, your orgasm taking the last breath of strength you had as he too plunged himself deeper and stilled there, his cum coating your walls. 

Neither of you moved for an eternity, but the first sign of clarity returning was the careful return of the gun to the holster. 

Pulling a handkerchief from his pocket, Spencer minimized the mess you made together, cleaning you up as he slipped out of you. Discarding it momentarily on the floor, he pulled your clothes back into position and led you back over to the chairs. Just as he moved to sit you down, though, you turned and wrapped your arms around his waist, pulling him into a hug. 

His arms hung suspended for a minute or two before he let them rest on your back, stroking your hair. 

“Sorry, it's been… it's been lonely, and I didn't realize how hard it had been until-” 

“It's okay. Take your time,” he said, sitting down in the chair and letting you curl up in his lap, burying your head in his neck

“We’ll catch this guy, and then you're out, okay Y/N? We'll come back and get you out soon.” 

Lifting your eyes to his, you nodded, pressing your lips to his with a smile as you again worked yourself back into character, regaining your earlier composure and lifting yourself from the man's too comfortable arms. 

“Well, Spencer, what do you say we get me back into panties and handcuffs and cut Caitlyn Grant loose?” 

[s1k0zu]

Hey everyone,

While I was a bit (okay a lot) late to board the Austin train, once I did, I fell HARD. Before I saw him in Dune II, I knew about him, but never thought to take a second look.

Then I saw Dune and I still can't get Austin's performance out of my head. He was amazing! 😍

I've devoured everything I can find with him since then, and I've been reading a lot of fan fiction lately, and a scene has been playing on repeat in my mind, so I decided to write it down.

I love all the Feyd fics but I find myself wanting more of Austin and less of Feyd (he's just a bit too intense and I kinda miss the hair). So I came up with the idea below.

Let me know if you liked it and if you want me to try writing about something else. 🫣

Fair warning ⚠️ I've never written any fiction before, so this will probably be a mess...and it's maybe a bit too long.

🔞 It's pure smut, so minors stay away!

Under his skin

You and Austin have been together since before his Elvis movie.

You'd met when you were teenagers and became fast friends, but until you had to spend two weeks locked together in his apartment in Australia, because of the pandemic, that was all you were - friends.

You'd visited him for the weekend and then the lockdown forced you to stay.

The tension between the two of you had started escalating gradually, until one night he couldn't resist kissing you any longer. All it took was that one kiss and you were his forever.

You started getting jobs in the crew of all of his projects so you could stay together, which is why you're now in Budapest on the set of Dune II.

It's early morning and it's already as hot as hell. Add to that the giant sound box you've been setting up, so Austin can film his fight scenes in it later, and you're close to fainting.

You haven't seen Austin in two months, because he was busy training in L.A. and you were on location in Jordan with the rest of the cast.

You flew in with the night flight, dropped your bags at his place and went straight to set. He was already there, getting into costume, and you didn't have the time to see him.

Once you're done setting up and finally have some free time you head to his trailer to surprise him and wish him luck.

You open the door and cool air hits your face. Then you see him and you're sure the chill running down your body isn't from the AC.

He's gloriously naked, a black loincloth is all that covers his body. They've painted his torso with black lines and he's got his bald cap already in place. You've seen him in full costume before, but only in photos. This hits differently.

There's something feral and imposing about him and it's doing things to you. Gone is the sweet, gentle Austin you know and in his place is a man who exudes power and dominance.

His body is pure perfection and you know how hard he worked to get here.

"Hey, Earth to y/n. Are you ok?" Austin's voice comes through the fog.

"Yeah", you sigh, "It's just..."

"What?", he asks, a sly smirk forming on his lips.

"Let's just say if you weren't about to shoot, I'd be ruining your makeup right now", you say, raking your gaze over his gorgeous naked body.

"Fuck", he mutters and steps toward you, biting his lower lip, his eyes darkening with want.

"Ah, ah", you stop him, placing a hand on his chest, "makeup."

"Damn you woman! How am I supposed to focus now?", he asks brushing a stray hair behind your ear.

"Hey, I'm not the one wearing next to nothing here," you tell him, "and you're not the only one having a hard time focusing."

You brush your lips against his and his hands instantly grip your face as he deepens the kiss. All the frustration of not being able to touch each other for the past two months melts as your tongues dance frantically, fighting for dominance.

"I'll make you a deal," you say, panting, "you go slay them with your talent and we can come back here during the lunch break, to finish this."

"Deal", he says huskily in your ear, melting you with his beautiful voice.

A crew member comes in to call him to set and breaks the tension before you two can go any further.

You watch him perform, always in awe of his ability to switch between himself and the character in seconds. You busy yourself with work and bringing him water bottles and towels between takes, and just like that the hours go by and it's time for lunch.

"I can't wait to take this thing off my head. I'm sweating like a pig," Austin says, taking a towel from your hands. He's been doing fighting scenes for the past hour and he's in full combat get up.

"I'll stick around to help with the set. Text me when you're done and we can take a shower," you say, walking your fingers playfully up his chest. You lean up to give him a quick kiss but he grabs your waist to keep you there, turning it into a steamy makeout session.

"I've missed you so much," Austin breathes out, his forehead touching yours.

"I've missed you too," you say, tilting his head lower to kiss his nose.

You disengage and he heads to his trailer so the makeup team can remove his bold cap.

A while later you get a text from Austin:

R u coming? We had a deal remember?

You mutter an excuse and head towards his trailer, willing yourself not to run.

#

When you enter, you see him running a hand through his wet hair, the bald cap gone. He still hasn't removed his costume.

"Want some help with that my lord", you ask, starting to unzip the back of his wetsuit.

When he hears you call him that Austin feels a shiver run down his body. He turns and wraps his arms around you.

"Say that again," he growls.

His eyes are dark with desire and you swear you can see Feyd still lurking in the background, ready to pounce.

"You should play the bad guy more often. It's a good look on you...my lord."

"Yeah? Wanna show me just how much you like it?"

You grip his neck, fingers tangled in his hair, and kiss him long and hard, your tongues fighting for dominance. You bite his lip when he pulls away and the groan that escapes from his throat sets your whole body on fire.

He returns the favour by placing kisses on your jaw and down your neck. When he reaches your collarbone he gives it a bite in just the right spot, making heat pool between your legs.

You lean into him, feeling his erection against you and bite his earlobe, whispering into his ear: "I want you inside me."

Austin's hands tighten on your ass and he gives you a smouldering look. His blue eyes are dark with desire as he dives in to kiss you again.

You start undressing each other frantically, hands running all over, tongues locked in a dizzying dance. The room fills with the sounds of heavy breathing, your moans, Austin's groans and wet kisses.

He grabs you by the hand and pulls you into the shower.

You're both panting while he turns around to fidget with the water tap. You admire his naked body while he adjusts the temperature. He's a work of art - all lean muscle chiselled to perfection.

Your eyes travel down his chest to the trail of hair under his belly button and between his thighs and the sizeable erection he's got. His penis is perfect: a round red tip, its length marbled by veins. You can't wait to taste it and feel it inside you.

You can't believe he's yours.

"My eyes are up here, gorgeous", Austin's amused voice brings you out of your dazed wet dream.

"And what a sight they are," you smile up at him.

After seeing you standing gloriously naked before him, raking your lust-filled stare over his body, Austin can't hold himself back any longer.

His hands come up to grab your face and he bends down to devour you. As the kiss deepens, Austin's hands travel down your body, lingering on your breasts. He pinches one of your nipples and you moan into his mouth.

He breaks the kiss to look at you.

Before you can answer he bends down and licks your neck, slowly descending to your left nipple.

"Fuck you're gorgeous. I can't wait to be inside you."

You start kissing his neck, his chest, his abs, your hands trailing down to his hips. His skin tastes salty from the sweat. You kneel in front of him and lick his length slowly, feeling the veins with your tongue. He lets out a groan and braces himself against the tiled wall.

You place tiny nibbles on the head, squeezing his balls, teasing him. He shudders in ecstasy as you swallow as much of his length as you can and start moving your head up and down slowly.

"Fuck, y/n, you have to stop or I'll come...," Austin pants on top of you. You speed up your pace, locking eyes with him.

Seeing you kneeling before him, your mouth on him, looking at him like that drives him over the edge. Austin comes with a groan and you feel his seed spill into your throat. You take him out of your mouth and give the head a little kiss.

"You taste so fucking good every time," you say standing up.

Austin grabs your cheeks and gives you a rough kiss.

"You have no idea how hot you look on your knees, do you?"

When one of his hands sneaks between your legs and he rubs his fingers on your clit you feel a jolt run over your whole body and you can't stop the moan coming out of your mouth.

Austin hears you moan, hands digging into his back and throws caution away - he bites down hard on your nipple, sliding his fingers into you.

"Fuck Austin", is all you can say, your mind going blank with pleasure. You don't know what's gotten into him, but you love this new, dangerous and dominant side he's showing you.

Austin places wet kisses and nibbles all over your breasts and stomach, pumping his fingers into you. You writhe in his arms, hands tugging his hair.

When his mouth descends on your clit you moan loudly. He bites it and then licks the sore spot, curling his fingers inside you. This sends jolts of electricity all over your body and you feel yourself coming, nails digging into his hair.

"Tell me what you want me to do to you," he says, voice hoarse from lust. You can feel his hard length pressing against your entrance.

Austin groans in pleasure when he hears you moan his name, the pain from your nails digging into his scalp sending bolts of pleasure straight to his groin.

He gets up, grabs your hips and lifts you, your back against the tiled wall.

You look at his soft, puffy lips and can't help kissing him again. Austin groans and slips his tongue into your mouth, making you dizzy.

When he finally breaks the kiss to look at you, you see the passion burning in his eyes, but there's something else there too - something feral. You realise he hasn't shaken Feyd off completely.

That sparks something in you, emboldens you.

"Have your way with me, my lord na-Baron. I'm all yours", you say, threading your fingers through his hair and pulling on it, your hips bucking into him.

Hearing you say that, something in Austin snaps. He can't think anymore, all he knows is that he wants to be inside you, now.

With a quiet growl he bends down to crash his lips into yours, sliding into you in one swift move.

You can't help the cry that comes out of your mouth when he slams into you. You were already wet, but he's big.

The sharp pain quickly turns into intense pleasure as he starts thrusting into you with abandon. You can feel every vein on his hard length as he's stretching you and filling you in the best way.

You've been together for years and every time he enters you feels like the first time. It's like your bodies are pieces of the same puzzle. The feel of him inside you is divine.

Austin doesn't wait for you to adjust to his size, he couldn't even if he wanted to. He's possessed by the desire to be inside you, to own you. He picks up his pace, slamming into you, his teeth leaving red marks all over your neck and shoulders. His left hand is moulded to your thigh, his right squeezing your breast.

You've never seen him like this, so forceful and primal, and you realise you love it. As the pain shoots through the pleasure you find yourself coming, trying not to scream. You mould your lips to Austin's to stifle your moans and that just spurs him on. He continues to slam into you, balls-deep, throughout your climax.

After a while, Austin comes to his senses and realises he's too rough, he's hurting you. Just as he slows down his pace, releasing you from his grip, he hears you say:

"No, don't hold back. I want you to lose control. Ravage me."

He looks into your eyes, making sure he didn't just imagine that, and sees only carnal desire and love there. He can't believe you're his.

"Fuck, I love you," he whispers.

You smile and bite his neck hard. The little control he'd managed to take back shatters. Austin slips out of you so he can turn you around, your back towards him, and slams back into you.

One of his hands travels to your neck and squeezes, the other goes to your nipple.

This angle helps him sink even deeper inside you. The sensation is almost too much and you feel the waves of another orgasm coming. Sex with Austin is always great but this is different. He's lost all control and given in to his desire, and you fucking love it.

Austin feels your walls clenching around him and he knows you're close. The hand around your throat tightens as he moves his other hand from your breast to your clit, running his fingers in agonisingly slow circles, and right before you come he inserts two fingers in.

The feeling of his fingers and his hard length inside you is too much and you trip over the edge, your whole body shaking. You claw at his neck and bury your fingers into his hair as he swallows your moans with a kiss when you both come.

You've never seen this side of him before. He's always so protective of you, so gentle. You realise he's been holding himself back, afraid to lose control and hurt you.

He looks at you apprehensively and you smile at him, tugging him close so you can wrap your hands around his neck and give him a slow, tender kiss.

For a while the only sounds in the shower are the running water and your heavy breathing as you're both coming down from your highs.

Eventually, Austin lets you go and eases out of you with a groan. Your legs are shaking as you lean onto the tile wall while he turns around to adjust the showerhead.

He melts into you, relieved you're okay.

You disengage and proceed with your shower, washing each other's hair and bodies, placing soft kisses here and there.

When you're done, Austin stops the water. He swaddles you in a huge fluffy towel, picks you up and carries you to the bed.

He lies next to you on his side, head propped up, facing you, tiny droplets of water running down his face and torso.

"I'm sorry", he says quietly, giving you a sad puppy look and caressing your face.

"For what? Giving me multiple orgasms?"

"No..." he laughs and then falls silent.

"I hurt you. I don't know what came over me."

"Not what, who. You've still got some of Feyd lurking in the background," you say a soft smile playing on your lips.

"That's not an excuse y/n. I should've stopped...I should've..." he trails off, looking remorseful.

"I don't know if you noticed Butler but I liked it. A lot", you lift his head so he can look at you.

"I'm not made of china you know. Promise me you'll stop holding back on me. This was fucking amazing."

"Yeah it was, wasn't it," he says, finally relaxing, "Okay, but on one condition: you promise to tell me if I cross the line."

"Deal," you say and mould your lips over his.

[sunflower-author]

HI i've been obsessed with akaashi atm so could you do yandere akaashi

he'd be such a sneaky yandere since he's so observant and memorises your little mannerisms and personality. he knows just what to say to you and other people as well to get you all to himself

anyway idm what you do, have fun with it!! hope you have a good day <33

SORRY IK IT IS SUPER LATE, AND I TRULY WANTED TO DO THIS!!

ALSO I WAS RAMBLING A LOT BUT HOPE YOU LIKE IT;)

~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^

      It's a Friday and school just ended, you go to the usual spot to meet Akaashi before he has to practice. A bench under the tree, on the opposite side of the gym, giving you guys time to talk, before making it to the gym.

After some time you see Akaashi turn the corner, from sitting on the bench you stand up to greet him. Smiling as you make your way toward him. 

"There you are, I was wondering if you ever were gonna come," you say jokingly.

"Sorry, that was my bad I was caught up with some schoolwork," Akaashi says. In reality, he was writing in his notebook about you. He has a notebook, where he keeps specific tabs about you. Your likes and dislikes, also including plans about what he would want in the future, plans like...

.

.

.

"Y/N, I was wondering if after practice today, would you want to come over to my house to study?" Akaashi says walking.

"Sure, our AP test is coming up, and I'll be lucky if I get 3/5," you say shyly, following after him. (Headcanon that Akaashi takes AP classes) *ALSO I SWEAR I'M GONNA FAIL THAT TEST!!!*

"No comment," Akaashi says as he continues to walk.

"Hey why'd you say that?" you ask, confused and a bit offended.

"Well.. what did you think I would say?" Akaashi asks curious.

"I don't know, just not that, maybe something encouraging at least," you say, trying to defend yourself.

"If I say something encouraging either one, you would hype yourself up thinking your gonna do well,  then do just below that, and get all sad and guilty," 

"When have I ever done anything like that?" you ask not believing that you would do anything like that.

 "Remember your Biology finial, you said that you wanted to get at least a 90, I said how you've been studying so your gonna do amazing, but then you got 89. You ended up with a B for that class, you stayed in you room a whole week during summer, all depressed."

"It dropped my perfect GPA," you say defending yourself.

"Or two, you would study all the time till you only do well on that one test and forget about the rest, before you say anything, midterms... Your lucky it was only midterms."

"That only happened once," In your defense you learned never to try that again.

Rolling his eyes he finally says "Or three, if I encourage you right now, you might not take studying seriously and think you can just wing the test, and therefore end up failing."

"Oh yeah.. I do that one a lot don't I," you say embarrassed.

"You have been improvising a lot more than you usually have, now that I think about it, is something wrong?" Akaashi asks concerned.

"Oh.. you've noticed that?" you ask as you stopped walking, looking down ashamed. " I admit that I have not been studying as much as before... I just feel like I'm burning out... or maybe I am burnt out..." 

Akaashi going right in front of you, he just pats your head, it may seem small, but it is your favorite form of affection from him. 

"You know it is normal to be burnt out, the important and most hardest part is overcoming it. I'm always free when you need me. If you want I'll skip practice today, we can just go straight to my house," Akaashi offers.

"That's very sweet of you Keji, but the volleyball team really needs you. You're the only one who can handle Bokuto, and I can't imagine how sad Bokuto would be when he finds out you're not there today." You reassure him.

"You know I care about you, more than I care about volleyball and Bokuto, just say the word and we can go to my house," Akaashi says, persisting.

"Keji, pretty soon is the Spring Nationals, you need to prepare, I'll meet you after your practice," you say as you start to part ways.

Unexpectedly Akaashi follows you grabbing you hand softly.

"Where are you going," he asks. Normally you would wait for him in the gym's girls locker rooms, till his practice is over, since there was air condition inside.

"I thought that today.. I would go stay in class and wait for you, maybe study a bit before.. so that you don't need to catch me up on anything, then we can study faster tonight," you said.

"What are you hiding?" he ask.

"I'm not hiding anything," you said defending yourself.

"You're avoiding eye contact with me, you keep scratching your neck, and your more defensives than normal, I can tell when you are trying to hide something Y/N," he said. After a few more moments of silence you finally confessed.

"Alright fine... one of my friends invited me to join track practice today, I know you don't want to join any sports, but it was just a practice, I'm not going to join," you said admittingly.

"Was that all you were trying to hide?" Akaashi asks, acting surprised. "I'm sorry if you felt like that was something you had to hide from me," his words so soothing, hiding the venom within.

"It was just because whenever I tell you about a club I was going to join you would always turn the idea down, or convince me not to do the club," 

"That is not true-"

"Soft tennis, kyudo, archery, ice skating, and now track and field," you cut him off, apparently Akaashi was not the only one that was keeping tabs on their partner.

"I just don't want you getting hurt, and plus who knows...  what if you get too involved in the sport and fall behind in school, also when you compete would you be willing to do it, all eyes would be on you, I know you get anxious in a crowd, and when you compete your coach, teammates, friends would all be counting on you," Akaashi explains.

"Yeah your right," you say, realizing that you shouldn't have thought about ever joining a sport, there would be no way you would be able to handle the stress and pressure. 

"I just thought I would be cool to have a sport since your in volleyball, I didn't want you to think I was lazy or something," you say timid.

"I would never think that about you, I know how much you study, how much you help your family around the house, I would never think of you as lazy," He says commending. "But just out of curiosity what type of event would you have picked if you were to do track and field?" he ask.

"It would be pole vault," you say. Hearing those words Akaashi was so glad to have convinced you not to. 

Pole vaulter's have upper body strength, and in the emergency of him kidnapping you, with you having some upper body strength it would just be irritating. He would win though. 

"Pole vault?" he asks, hesitantly.

"Is there a problem?" you ask curiously.

"It is just that pole vaulting is one of the most hardest events, and you're just going to jump into trying it," is all he says. 

But that was more than enough. What were you thinking, trying to pole vault, your in your 3rd year. Image trying to practice, how underclassmen will just see how bad you are. They must be way better, the season started 1 month ago. Also there was other events practicing too, image all those eyes on you.

"Yeah your right, it was just a dumb idea, I'm gonna text my friend that I'm busy," you said as you pulled up your phone, and started texting.

As you start to walk towards the gym with Akaashi following behind you.

[youcouldmakealife]

Stuff That Helps Me Write: Pacing (no, not that kind), and burnout avoidance

So this was supposed to be about something entirely different., but every time I started making a point, I got distracted by a second, bonus idea (ways to trick your brain when it's not cooperating with you! things I've tried (I will try everything) and what worked and didn't! what to do with writer's block!) and then start writing about that, and I've got half a dozen unrelated paragraphs going in my drafts, so I think I'm just going to make this a mini-series of 'stuff that helps me write and may also help you (or maybe they won't, I don't know, this shit's all subjective)'.

If there's anything in particular you'd like to hear about, or something about my process you're curious about, absolutely feel free to reply or shoot me an ask and I'll do my best to address them as I go.

But yeah, pacing. And more specifically, not burning out. I figured it was important I hit this one first, because I think it's the most important one, or at least, the one that makes the biggest difference.

With the caveat that I am someone who has repeatedly driven myself into burnout, I'm also someone who now knows why that is, and have been teaching myself how to, you know, not do that.

So. Here's how I, you know, don't do that.

Will preface this by again mentioning that most writing advice (and advice in general) never seemed to work for me, and I mostly thought I was just Bad at Doing Things, until I learned my brain's literally wired differently, and that I'd been trying to apply processes that didn't actually work for said wiring.

So instead, I figured out what worked for me. And what works for me isn't necessarily what will work for you, or even what will work for me a month or five years down the line, but it's going okay right now.

I'll straight up say that, contrary to all the Writing Advice, I don't write every day, and I don't think it's necessary, or even necessarily a good idea -- I have at times, but I no longer do, because if I write for more than six days straight I find the proverbial well dries up and I write less than I do had I just taken a break when I needed it.

Cognitive energy and the sort of ephemeral ~inspiration (work that's been done on a subconscious level) are fundamentally no different than physical energy: if you don't replenish it, you will run out. If you overdo it, you will run out. If you consistently overdo it without replenishing it, you will burn out.

Taking a page from hockey players here: if you did an intense workout right before a game they'd ask what the fuck was the matter with you. You need a nap and a meal and to get some stretching and light work in. Running at 100% all the time will burn you out in every single field, including this one.

That's not me saying not to run at 100% at all. I generally try to pace myself now, but if I'm really in it, and the words are coming easily, I don't stop until they stop -- I wrote just shy of 4k of later scenes for SAIT last week (my 2024 record!), all in one sititng, by hand, when I was supposed to be sleeping, because that's when the inspiration came. I didn't fall asleep until past 6am that night, and my hand is still mad at me.

But you know how much writing I got done the follow day? (None, I was busy transcribing 4k of handwriting). The rest of this week? (Not much more than that). Those bursts of energy are awesome, and honestly can make you feel like a writing god, but the well's the well, and I've learned my personal well is about 5000 words a week deep.

Before my most recent scrape with autistic burnout, which I'm still sort of climbing my way out of, that well was closer to 7500 words. But honestly, it probably wasn't; I was likely just siphoning words from future wells and then it all caught up with me when I was looking at a horizon of dry-ass wells ahead of me. (I'll admit this isn't a perfect metaphor.)

But seriously, my advice for basically everything, not just writing (and something I wish I'd learned before I hit my 30s), is 'figure out what pace you can work at sustainably'.

Please note that 'sustainably' is not 'without literally dying'. Because my literal ass thought when people said 'give it 100%' they meant, you know, 'give it 100%' (I know! absurd of me), rather than 'give the best effort you can give in this moment considering your current resources'. So I gave it my all (also interpreted that one wrong I guess?). And then I wondered why I kept hitting a wall all the time. And why, eventually, I stopped being able to climb that wall entirely.

I don't think I'm ever going to reach that 7500 word threshold again. There will be weeks I'm so inspired I write that much, but the next week I probably won't manage more than 2500. Or maybe I'll have two 7500 weeks in a row, but I'll need to take a whole week off after that, or spend several weeks working at a lower tempo while I let the well replenish itself.

I've been tracking some metrics quite closely as I sort of tweak my life into its new shape (said shape being 'do the best you can given your resources') , and during my most productive month of this year I wrote 3x as much as the worst (writing wise, I was finalising publication at the time), my current weekly average is about 4800 words. Sometimes it's a bit higher or lower, sometimes much higher or lower, but that's what I can sustainably do right now.

Frankly, I'm a little cranky about this: I know I can do more, because I did do more. But my priority now is not to send myself straight back into burnout again, so when I sprint, it's just that, rather than my previous 'trying to run a marathon at the pace of a sprinter'. I'm writing less than I used to, but it's honestly not that much less: because the pace is sustainable rather than boom and bust, I don't run myself ragged enough to desperately need a break.

I'm aware this advice only works if you have control over your own time, and a schedule that doesn't force you to focus on writing say, one day a week, or around other obligations, but the only real workaround for burnout is consistency, and that consistency cannot be your maximum.

Or, it can, but I guarantee you that will bite you in the ass at some point, and the pain of not getting enough done is nothing compared to the pain of not being able to get anything done because your nervous system threw up its hands and decided if you weren't going to listen to their clues (feelings, symptoms) or their warnings (Feelings, Symptoms) that you were overdoing it, they were going to shut your ass down until you listened.

0/10 do not recommend.

Next week: how to trick your brain into doing shit that it doesn't feel like doing, even though it's onto all your tricks by now. Or at least, how I trick mine.

[lionlena]

1. New job, new problems... (PedroPascalxreader) - one shot

Ok, so here's the first one shot of: one shots week. As I wrote, I was inspired by my problems, but don't take everything literally, because of course I changed some things, but generally yes, my new co-workers are mean bitches. But I've come to terms with it. At least instead of talking to them, I write ff xD

Summary: co-workers at your new job treat you badly. You try to hide it from your boyfriend, but even from a distance Pedro senses that something is wrong.

Warnings: little sad but later fluff and loving, caring Pedro

This can be considered as a continuation: ♡Just let it go…

You were happy when you got a new job where you made more money. No matter how many times Pedro told that you could have his money. You felt bad about it and wanted to prove to him that you weren't with him for the money.

However, you soon found out that your new job was a nightmare. And it wasn't the job itself, because it was easy and fun for you. Your co-workers were the problem. You ended up in a three-person team consisting of all women, and you felt their hostility from the very beginning. They had trouble giving you the simplest of information, like where the bathroom is. They responded with annoyance to your every question. But you thought they'd get used to you over time. You were polite and tried to have little chats with them, but it was not effective because they ignored you. With each passing day, you felt worse and worse, and as if your misfortune wasn't enough, Pedro flew to the set in Morocco.

You sighed heavily as you sat alone at a table during your lunch break. You've been scrolling through the photos fans have taken of your boyfriend. It always made you feel a little better and made you forget everything for a moment. Your boyfriend looked pleased, though you could see he was tired. You wanted so much to hug him and make sure he was taking care of himself.

Of course, Pedro wanted you to go with him. At least for a few days, but you couldn't take free time from your new job so quickly. Another minus.

And of course, every time you spoke to him, you said everything was fine. You didn't want to worry him. You knew he should be focused on a movie set.

You were just looking at a photo of Pedro wearing a white t-shirt that was visibly wet at the bottom. You smiled and started to wonder what your beloved had done. Knowing him, he probably spilled something on himself. Pedro was so clumsy sometimes. But you loved it about him. You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn't even notice your co-workers walking past you. Their sudden giggles made you jump and almost drop your phone.

"Seriously Y/N," Jane said. "You'd better focus on your job, not on dreaming about some actor who doesn't even know you exist."

You had to bite your tongue not to say that unlike her, you work instead of filing your nails half the day.

"I don't know what these girls see in him," Michele said.

You perfectly saw how a few days earlier she was drooling at the monitor when she was reading an article about your boyfriend.

Before you could answer anything, they walked away laughing like crazy.

When you talked to Pedro in the evening, you could hardly keep your composure. He asked you several times if you were okay.

"Honey, you really do sound kind of weird," he said sadly.

"I'm really fine... I've had a busy day today and I think I'm having a migraine."

"My poor baby," he cooed. "Maybe you should lie down."

"That's what I'll do."

"Do you want me to talk to you on the phone until you fall asleep?"

You wanted to cry. Your boyfriend was so sweet and caring.

"Yes," you whispered.

You only felt worse for the next few days. Even during lunch, you didn't look at pictures with Pedro because your co-workers always sat at the table next to you. You were sure those bitches did it on purpose. It was ridiculous and you felt like you were in high school.

You started wondering if you should just start going out to some restaurant for lunch. You would have less time then, but you would gain peace of mind. Suddenly you heard some commotion behind you.

"Is that him? It's impossible," Michele murmured.

You turned around and your heart leaped. You couldn't believe your eyes. A smiling Pedro was walking towards you with a small bouquet of your favorite flowers. You couldn't take it any longer and ran over to him. He welcomed you with open arms and hugged you tightly. You pulled away from him after a while, to look into his eyes. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw the silly faces of these three bitches.

"What are you doing here?" you choked out.

"Did you really think I wouldn't sense something was wrong?" He stroked your cheek gently. "I'm back only for two days, but I hope it's enough."

You nodded and murmured, "I still have a few hours left at work."

"I know, but I couldn't wait to see you. I'll pick you up in the car so you don't have to take the subway back and we'll spend a wonderful evening together."

You blushed involuntarily, and he chuckled and whispered in your ear, "Yeah, I'm thinking about that too."

You shook your head and groaned as you realized you had to get back to work. You kissed Pedro on goodbye.

Suddenly your co-workers wanted to talk to you, but this time you ignored them. It was really sweet revenge.

Pedro has come for you as promised. On the way, he picked up food from your favorite restaurant. At home, he lit the candles and asked, "Dinner first, or bath first?"

You looked at him lovingly. "Dinner."

After you ate, he prepared an aromatic, warm bath for you. The tub was big enough for both of you to fit comfortably. You sat between his legs and rested your head on his chest. His big hands traced patterns on your breasts and belly. You finally felt relaxed. You closed your eyes and sighed heavily. You felt Pedro kiss you on the head. "My love, can you tell me what's been making you so sad lately?"

You nodded and squeezed his hand tightly. Though you tried to be calm, your voice trembled a few times as you told him about your job and how your co-workers treated you.

Pedro listened to you carefully, and at the end of your story, he hugged you tightly and kissed your shoulder.

"I'm so sorry babe. These stupid women should be glad to be working with someone as great as you." He placed a kiss on your shoulder again. "I know we've talked about this before, but you don't have to work. You know that. Why do I need money if I can't make the people I love happy?"

You smiled and squeezed his arm. "I know baby. But I want to go back there and watch those bitches die of jealousy because I have the most amazing and handsome boyfriend in the world."

Pedro chuckled and hugged you tighter. "Can this most amazing and handsome boy take you to bed and enjoy your body?"

"Yes!" you squeaked.

A week later, your boss appreciated your work and decided to transfer you to a new, more experienced team. Your new co-workers turned out to be very friendly and communicative. Enjoyed your job again. Though it was nice knowing you had a great boyfriend thanks to whom you don't have to work. And you don't have to worry about money.

Taglist: @creedslove

[zombeebunnie]

Trembling Essence:💙Script progress + Updates💙

Hello and welcome new followers, long time no see! I was very busy most of this month, but I am back and ready to continue from where I left off on the game! This game development post might be a bit long but I tried to condense everything! :]

"How are things going so far?":

It's going slow and steady! I haven't been able to do too much these past few weeks, however, I wrote a few parts out before I got too busy and couldn't do anything else.

I want to be very careful when it comes to spoilers but, based on your choices, some of these areas will give off immersive cozy/homelike vibes that really express Noah and the player(Y/N)'s view towards each other. In the old 2023 script I was very new to writing so the small semi-hints of romance weren't the entire focus compared to the horror aspect but there's a better balance between both genres now and I'm still aiming for a meaningful slow burn versus it just being all over the place. :] I liked writing them a whole bunch which lead to a lot of these taking place in the mid/end of Day 4+, they just need to be placed in specific areas that call for it. With that being said, it felt really comfy adding key details about Noah and creating meaningful sections in the game. I was even going to draw out some of the unseen script/scenes but I believe the best thing to do is give deeper lore from the [Extended Demo] first. Even though my writing style has improved I still have to fix the multiple pacing issues I wrote last year.

"Playtester's advice":

I wanted to continue working through Noah's backstory but I kept having moments where I'd get sidetracked into wanting to fix up the start of the game again. Eventually, I talked to my play testers about it and they gave me a few encouraging pointers.

To help keep my process at ease, I will fix the beginning of the game when I take breaks from writing up Noah's backstory. :]

I talked about this during early 2024 but the start of the game that leads up to the cabin is still getting reworked. I was able to get some of it fixed for the [Extended Demo] but I wasn't done. Things are still up in the air but, I will say that I have a better view of everything than I did before. :] Another priority that needs fixing are the backgrounds! I've improved a lot on drawing and they need to be optimized. When you first start up the game, you wake up in a holed out tree in the swamp with the choice to leave this area and possibly end up in the forest. I was going for a very immersive form of symbolism that only a few noticed but, I believe I can do a better job about this. Unfortunately I don't have any new backgrounds to show right now but maybe next week I'll have some finished up! :]

"Art process/Noah's sprite sheets":

As far as Noah sprite sheet goes, it's still in sketch mode.

I didn't draw anything since I was gone so I need to do a few warm ups before I get to them. There are some old drawing prompts I wrote down and old sketches that I never got a chance to doodle so hopefully I can get to them at some point with some attached lore. :,]

My Q&A / Ask box has been reset!

Thank you to those who have sent in asks in the past, unfortunately they all disappeared except for 1 while I was gone. I have no idea what happened but I can only guess it just got reset.

If you have any questions about Trembling Essence/Noah feel free to ask or resend them in here please. This makes it easier for me to see and answer accordingly! I would really like to hear from you guys!

This is all I have to share so far, Thank you to everyone for the continued support and patience while I was gone! I was ready to accept the interest for this game to fade out and coming back to see that it didn't happen makes me happy, I really appreciate it. :,]

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

Brainrot Housekeeping: Updated Schedule!

Hi friends! I've got a whole message under the cut, but here's the important part regarding this blog's new content schedule:

Saturdays: mini-hcs Sundays: answering asks (& maybe some rambles?) Mondays: full-hc Tuesdays: answering asks (& maybe some shitposts?) Wednesdays: Vesuvia Weekly Thursdays & Fridays: rest

You might see some polls showing up in the next week or so about new content types - if you're interested, feel free to vote! ^.^ More under the cut:

While I haven't hit rock bottom, I've been getting some symptoms of burnout recently and I'd like to avoid completely running myself into the ground XD

This blog has really pushed me to see what kind of creativity I have, especially just how much work I'm able to produce and sustain. I thought I'd get tired and burn out at two months tops, and it's been over and year and I have no immediate plans to stop! However, taking a look at my own system right now, I do think I need to slow down.

To be honest, fanwork isn't something I've been doing a long time - this tumblr blog is the only fandom creative stuff I've ever done! Before that, most of the things I created were originals - music, art, and of course, writing (though I haven't touched my sketchbook/paints in forever and I haven't done any sightreading in years - whoops).

It gets hard to keep your muscles moving when you only move them in one direction. As much as I love writing headcanons for the M6 in response to people's prompts, there is so much else my mind can do that it misses having the space for. Which brings me to the reason for this schedule adjustment - I miss having that creative freedom.

I still greatly enjoy writing headcanons for you guys and participating in the fandom, and I don't plan to stop anytime soon. However, I want to take some time back to get back into frolicking in the stuff my own brain comes up with, and making space for that to grow into something real.

The questions I need to figure out now are 1) how much time is it going to take me to get my full capacity back? and 2) should I keep this as a purely Arcana blog, or expand it for all my creative work?

If you've read this far, you have my sincerest gratitude. I'll see you guys tomorrow :)

Cheers!

brainrot

[emmy-everafter]

Tagged by @sparrowmoth to share about my WIPs. Idk if anyone is actually all that interested in these, but on the off chance that you are, feel free to swing by my ask box with questions!

Rules: Post the names of your WIPs and open your ask box for questions about them.

Published WIPs

Right now, there's just one: Don't Come Any Closer (But Don't Move Away), Win/Team (Between Us/UWMA), rated M, 3 chapters out of ????

(I actually have written several chapters ahead but updates will likely slow down over time as i catch up to the place where I'm currently drafting. But we're getting to the good stuff now and ugh I'm so excited, I love this fic and these boys so much!!)

Unpublished WIPs

Greenhouse fic (better title forthcoming), a short and fluffy sequel to We're Gonna Need a Bigger Pentagram. Jesper/Wylan (Shadow & Bone/Six of Crows), rated T, one-shot. I have about 2k words written and because it's a Jesper POV, I'm planning to publish it later this month as part of "Jesptember," a celebration of our favorite Sharpshooter from the @i-can-read-to-him Wesper discord server.

A Week in the Life (tentative title), followup to the greenhouse fic and continuation of the Coven of Crows universe. Told through flashbacks to a time before WGNABP. Mostly gen crows-as-found-family with hints of Wesper, Helnik, Kanej, and Kuwei/Jesper (I forget if people use Kuwesper for just them or for them + Wylan oops). Probably rated T, probably 6 or 7 chapters. I've only written out a bit, the rest is all outline right now.

Other general ideas for Coven of Crows stuff that I'm happy to talk about!

The time travel crows fic (it has a title but I don't want to share it yet). All the crows ships, probably rated M, gonna be a longfic. I have some chapters written but I need to revise them because I changed my mind about some worldbuilding stuff. Time travel is hard to write, y'all!

Servant & Lever(age): a six of crows Leverage AU, rating TBA, length TBA, mostly just outlines at the moment.

I Won't Give Up Your Ghost, Julie & The Phantoms longfic, rated T or M. I have maybe 8 chapters of this written? But I don't know if there's enough people reading JatP anymore for me to maintain motivation when doing a longfic and I also got distracted, but I had a solid outline for the rest and may come back to it eventually

Untitled sexytimes fic, Palm/Neungdiao (Never Let Me Go the series), definitely rated E, one-shot. Will I ever finish this? Who knows.

A few other half-written or half-baked Thai BL fics, mostly M or E one- and two-shots, for shows like Moonlight Chicken, Tale of a Thousand Stars, etc.

I have some other Six of Crows ideas but I'm much less certain that I'll get around to writing them so I haven't listed them here

No pressure tags for anyone who feels like sharing (apologies if you've already done this and I missed it!): @oneofthewednesdays @hotpinkmurex @magicandpizza @ace-kaz-brekker @starwritebrekker

[pipileo]

A Fictional Short Story.

I was bored late at night so instead of sleeping, I wrote this thing. Maybe reading enthusiasts will read this and go "neat." Enjoy.

CW: References to... Cannibalism? I guess

"So. You're sure you want to sign up with us? We want to make it very clear that you probably won't be able to change your mind," the lady at the reception desk warned me. She slid me a clipboard and a slightly chewed blue ink pen, all while looking at me with a serious look on her face. "Make sure you think it through. Fill this out, and sign your name at the bottom. You may have a seat until you're done filling out the form."

She pointed me to the waiting area, where several other people willing to join this program were also signing out their own documents. A diverse waiting area, I thought to myself. I sat next to this one guy, since every other space already had someone writing their info on the form sitting in it. Plus, this guy didn't totally look like he was on the verge of mental collapse. Wish I could say the same.

Anyways, I sat next to this guy. He looked about as presentable as a hobo, I'd say. Without even talking to him, I came up with the prediction that this was a man who had only been on the streets for less than a week before coming over to a place like this, to escape the consequences of his actions from a stupid decision he made. His clothes weren't all that dirty, and neither was his wool, except maybe for a few dark spots on his hands. It all hinted towards him being new to the hobo game. I guessed that he might've fallen victim to the casinos, since he didn't have that "crack addict" look to him compared to the other people here.

I looked down at the form that was fastened to the clipboard. Skimming through the pages, yeah. It was clear what they were asking. There was no ambiguity, it was all crystal clear what you were getting yourself into. They asked about drug use, blood type, amount of exercise and weight, species. All of these correlated directly to the food the carnivores would be getting from us volunteers. I sighed, before placing the tip of the pen on the paper and beginning to fill everything out.

I was about halfway through the page when I sorta felt my mind starting to wander off the paper, staring at the man's hooved foot next to me. I sorta wanted to confirm my suspicions with him, and besides, who's it hurt to make a conversation? I tapped the guy on the shoulder. Once he looked towards me, I began to talk.

"What's got a guy like you here in this place?" I started, setting my pen down on the page.

I didn't get a response for a few seconds, but then he replied back with, "I just thought I should do this because... Well, what they're offering just seems too good to pass up. Who wouldn't want a chance to live in luxury, right?"

"You'd only be there for a few months, I think. But yeah. I understand. Never had a time in my life where my fridge was full. Always tried to manage three jobs, but with this new condition I got, it's just... not worth it anymore. I tried to buy myself some more time but, I think I- heh, I think I made it worse."

"Hm. What did you get?"

I sort of paused for a moment, going over what the doctors told me that fateful night a few weeks ago.

"Something with my skin. Whatever it was called slipped my mind, I guess. By the way, name's Kobou Sezak. Nice to meet you." I replied, reaching my hand out to the man.

"Nice to meet you, Kobou. You can call me Tufft." He replied, politely accepting the handshake. "And it's a shame. I feel bad for you, with your skin condition and all."

"Oh, don't be. I'm sure things will only be getting better from here."

"Amen to that, bunny boy. Can't wait to get into the program. I'll finally be able to let myself relax. It's been a rough few weeks."

"Feel free to elaborate, man. I'm listening. Big ears i've got, after all."

I finally began to resume filling out the form again. Otherwise, I'd be here all day, stuck in a room of people with stories worse than ours. I filled out the form a bit more as Tufft began to explain his own story leading up to today. Turns out I'm damn good at guessing. At least in broad definitions. Tufft had indeed been a newly made hobo, since he had bet (technically not gambled), his life savings on a race that cost him everything. He's apparently too shameful to get someone like his sister to come house him, because he didn't want her to see what he'd done. Especially since Tufft was older, and was supposed to be a role model to her. He'd rather be fed to the wolves before he'd come face to face with his family and admit his actions at the dinner table.

Me too, honestly. It seemed easier to me. All it took was a paper form and a contract to get sent to paradise until the end of your days. Anyways, eventually, Tufft and I said our goodbyes as we walked to the desk and handed in our forms and waited to be called in, one person at a time, into the other room. Tufft was called first, and for a while, I just sat and twiddled my fingers in silence, avoiding eye contact with the more messed-up looking people in the room. It felt like everyone was judging me for judging them. The whole room felt tense, as if an argument was about to break out at any moment.

When I reached the next room after being called on next, I was sat down at a table, with a doctor on the other side. They were much taller, which wasn't surprising in the slightest. Wolves, am I right? But it still made me want to consider changing my mind. Tall people freak me out.

"Alright, so, Mr. Sezak. Judging from the form, I'd say you'll have... maybe eight months max for the program. Our medical team will try to have your skin condition treated before your time is up so that your meat will be more suitable for consumption."

I sighed. Eight months is the time I had left. Well, I signed the form, so this is what I got. I nodded my head, accepting the decision I made in its entirety.

"Eight months. Got it." I replied.

"And just to remind you of everything you have agreed to, you, Kobou Sezak, belong to us now. You will live your remaining eight months in luxury, well-maintained facilities with high surveillance to ensure your pleasure, all without requiring to pay a single penny to our facilities, and at the end of your term, you will be euthanized and sent to butcher shops to feed and appease the predator population. You must follow all instructions given to you by our staff, regardless of whatever activities you may be partaking in, or reluctance to comply."

"God damn," I reacted, hopefully with plausible reasoning. "Uhm, I understand, sir."

"Good. Now, you will be making your way into the room directly across the hall, alright, Mr. Sezak? You will be given a permanent tattoo of our company's logo, and then you will be prepped up to live in our facilities. Enjoy your stay, and have a nice day."

I was about to say something, but then the doctor dismissed me and yelled out for the next person to be called in. I sucked it up, and left the room, heading across the hall to get a tattoo that symbolized my new life of luxury, as well as being a constant reminder of my choice for the rest of my eight months. Soon, I'll just be food on someone's plate. Morbid, really. But as long as it's better than what was out there, I shouldn't complain over such an opportunity. My body felt warm as I grabbed the handle to the next room. Goodbye, responsibilities. I'm living the lavish life now.

[sharkneto]

hi!!!! I was rereading the shifting mirrors and holding it together since you finished joining together recently (it’s SO good, it’s so so SO good, your writing is always so well done and flows so well) and I had a couple questions. Sorry if this is weird - if you don’t want to answer them feel free to ignore this ask, I’m just curious!

1.) did you start writing joining together while you were still posting holding it together? a lot of the details I noticed in HIT were referenced in JT, and I was just kind of like ‘that’s a LOT of details to remember’ so I was wondering if you were working backwards !!

2.) have you ever thought about what happens at the end of HIT? do you think they would actually end up stopping the apocalypse, or would the commission try to come and correct them? I thought that was interesting - that the commission said they were done with five, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re done with the offshoot timeline ; if they hadn’t interfered prior, that would mean they were still on track for an apocalypse, right ? I like to speculate about this. with sheer strength of will I think that five would probably end up stopping it, mostly because he knows how to work through his rage rather than act on impulse again - and now he has the knowledge to try and connect the others so that viktor doesn’t feel so isolated.

3.) what was your favorite part of writing the story / what kept you motivated to keep it going ? I’ve started a couple chaptered fics, and then I get three or four chapters in and lose it completely.

I love, love, love the world youve created - I love the characters youve built and the personalities behind them. the dedication youve held on to to keep the series going is admirable; I can barely write 20k, much less hundreds of thousands of words. I was actually thinking of asking your permission to maybe write an offshoot of your offshoot (it might be the thing that gets me back into writing for tua) but idk if I’d have the imagination or creativity to make it nearly as compelling and fun as yours. Congratulations and great work on finishing it !! <333

this got long - feel free to ignore it if it’s overstepping or weird, lol !! I hope you’re doing well - have a great night, shark :)

Hey Toby! Glad you enjoyed it all so much and thanks for the kind words! It's a little surreal to have it done, JT has been a WIP almost as long as I've been into TUA.

I started writing JT before HIT. This whole series was supposed to be a Just For Me Fun Project while I rotted alone during the pandemic that I ended up sharing with permission from orsumfenix and encouragement from friends. I was a bit into JT, I think, when I started thinking about how fun it would be to get more siblings in here, and those musing became HIT. HIT got posted first because it had a lower barrier for entry, with more focus on the Hargreeves we know instead of OCs. So, because the stories were written more-or-less simultaneously, it was easy to reference one or set up something for the other. Working forwards and backwards, with the end of JT already written (in a rough draft) when I was writing HIT, so I knew where Rob, Sarah, and Number were coming off of at that point. (The tiny detail I'm most fond of is Allison in HIT noting that Number broke his nose at some point, and then in JT we get to see the stupid scenario in which he broke his nose.)

(rest under a readmore because I ramble)

I do have thoughts on what happens after HIT! More of a time jump, to Number's Apocalypse Week, and I've got words in a WIP started about that (and a few snips shared in my snip tag, although some I think I've changed some of the details, now). It goes... less smoothly than it should, for a guy who has (almost) all the details he needs. If motivation continues, I'll share that eventually. If it doesn't, I'll word-vomit an outline so at least people who are interested can know how it goes down. I don't see the Commission coming back - the people obsessed with Five are dead, and the organization is done with him. They don't have the resources to spare to keep going after him, so at least in Five and Number's timelines, they're out of the Commission's scope.

What kept me going was a combo of things. 2020-2022ish, I had a fuckton of time. I only worked three days a week because of covid protocols, I couldn't go anywhere because of covid, and I couldn't see anyone because of covid. I had four days a week to fill, and a lot of that time got filled with writing - all of HIT and the first draft of JT happened during this time, plus all the other fics I published throughout that time. What kept me going is that I was having a ton of fun writing and fun interacting with other people about my fics. Love, love, love talking about them (so never apologize for an ask like this, every fic writer is begging for an excuse to ramble like this). I liked thinking about the characters, thinking about Number doing mundane things I was doing made them more interesting, I liked thinking about Rob and Sarah's little romcom life, and I'm fascinated by Five's whole deal. My favorite part of writing these is Five (both versions of him) - thinking about him and how he'd react to x or y, how others react to him. I love that, at his core, he's kind of a loser. I love what an incredible vehicle for grief he is. He's a character of all time for me.

How to keep going, I don't have an easy answer for it. Some people outline, so they have the skeleton of what they're doing and where they're going. I'm not one of those people, I have an idea of the general shape and trajectory of the story and go from there, splitting up chapters as needed. I think it's important to not force it, or the writer's block gets worse and then you're stressed about writing instead of having fun with it, and that's no good - the point is to have fun. If you run out of steam, you run out of steam and you have to take a six-month hiatus until life calms down and you have words again (as a hypothetical example). Don't be afraid to poke at other ideas even if you have a giant fic unfinished. For having 25 fics on AO3, I have 35 other WIP files on my computer. Some of them have a couple hundred words, some have tens of thousands of words, some of them I'll come back to finish, some of them I won't. Such is life - some ideas have legs, others don't. I don't set out thinking "Oh this fic is going to be 50k words with 10 chapters". I just write until it feels done; sometimes that's 2k words, sometimes it's almost 200k words. The point I'm trying to make, here, is that we're all just fucking around having fun, and words flow easier when I'm remembering that and not stressing about being done or trying to finish for a self-imposed deadline. You've got it :)

Feel free to write in my little world! Would love to see what others are thinking about, what stuck with them. Just give me (and orsumfenix, if you use Number) a shoutout if you share it! And don't sell yourself short - I'm sure you've got great ideas and the chops to write them out. Don't compare yourself to me; you might write in a world I helped shape, but you've got your own voice and style to give it. I, for one (if you end up writing and sharing it), would love to hear your version of it all :)

[splish--splash--minecraft]

Scarian snippet - Pizza AU

I wasn't expecting to get that much attention on the scarian bit I wrote earlier, so I've decided to post some more writing! This one is for an au I've been working on recently that I have dubbed the pizza AU. That'll make sense in a moment.

It's a college/university AU, though that doesn't come into play all that much until later. It's also an AU in which Grian works at a pizza place and Scar comes in every week with the most ridiculous and outlandish orders. Hence the AU name.

I've no clue when it'll be finished as I can be a slow writer at the best of times (and seeing as I did recently get a job - at a pizza place! - this is not the best of times as it's taking up a lot of my free time) and since this will also be a one-shot (I rarely trust myself with multichap fics), it might be a while. I'll try to keep y'all updated though. So, y'know, if you're interested...maybe drop a follow? Thanks <3

Anyway, without further ado...the snippet. That is almost 1k words. Oops?

Grian sighed when the phone rang. He knew, without looking, that it was 1AM. 

It only rang for a moment before Grian picked it up, just to get this over with. “Hello, this is Pizza Paraslice, what can I get for you?”

“Hi! Okay, can I get a large with parmesan garlic sauce, mozzarella and asiago cheese, jalapenos and diced boneless chicken, with a ranch drizzle? Thanks!”

Grian’s eyes closed as he let out a sigh as he took in the order. “Mmhm. Name for your order?”

“Scar!”

“And would you like pickup or delivery?

“Pickup, please!”

Grian didn’t know why he had to bother with asking Scar all that, since It was the same every time. Only the order was different. His boss had insisted though, so.

“Alright, that’ll be $21.59. How would you -”

“I’ll pay with cash there.”

“Okay, it’ll be ready in about 15 minutes.”

“See you then!”

The line clicked and Grian allowed himself to take a deep breath before looking down at the order he had entered into the POS system. Great. Another weird order from Scar.

He glanced at the one other person working at this time, rolling his eyes as they continued to stare at their phone even as the order counter dinged by the makeline, telling them they had an order. He dragged himself over to it and set about making the order.

Honestly, it wasn’t as weird as some of his other orders. The sauce was a little odd, sure, as was the ranch drizzle at the end, but he’d seen far weirder combinations, all courtesy of Scar. 

He let out a breath of relief once the pizza was in the oven and he could wash the jalapenos juices from his hands. He relaxed for a second, eyeing the board to make sure no more orders had come in. Honestly, Grian had no idea why Scar bothered calling every time. Most orders they got came in online, or a few people would even order there. But Scar always called for whatever reason. Grian never asked.

The door opened right as Grian got the pizza out of the oven to cut it. He didn’t have to look to know it was Scar. They didn’t have any other orders available for pickup, and very few people came in to order at this time of night. Plus, the sound of his cane against the tiled floors was sign enough that it was him.

Still, he peeked around the cutting table to see Scar looking around before smiling at him. “There’s my favorite person!”

Grian rolled his eyes with a huff. He always said that every time he came in. “I’m almost done with your pizza, give me a sec.”

“No worries, take your time. It’ll be amayzin anyway.”

Grian snorted. He wasn’t so sure about that, but he didn’t say anything, just dutifully cut the pizza and added the ranch drizzle. He closed the pizza box and walked around the cut table to where Scar stood behind the counter, cash in hand and wide grin directed his way.

Grian did his best to ignore him as he rang Scar up, taking the cash - in perfect amount, so he didn’t even need to get any change. With that done, he handed the pizza to Scar. “Anything else I can get you?”

“Your number?” Scar asked, hopeful.

Grian rolled his eyes again, though he couldn’t stop the slight flush from creeping up his cheeks and the barest hint of a smile that tugged at his lips.

“Maybe next time,” he said, just as he did every time.

Scar clicked his tongue. “I thought for sure this would be the week. Oh well. See you next week!”

He turned around and left, holding the pizza with one hand and his cane in the other as he backed out of the door, waving the end of his cane at Grian briefly before he disappeared out of sight.

“Please just ask him out already. Or give him your number, at least.”

Grian jumped as his co-worker appeared behind him. He pressed his hand to his chest and let out a breath. “God, don’t scare me like that!”

“Ask the poor guy out then!”

“And why would I do that?” Grian asked, raising his eyebrow.

His co-worker groaned. “Dude, anyone can tell you’ve got a crush on him. And he has one on you! Every week he orders a pizza and then asks for your number. Are you ever actually going to give him it?”

“I definitely do not have a crush on him. He makes my Wednesdays miserable. You think I like making his stupid pizzas? And of course, you never help.”

“Eh, you got it. You do just fine with making pizzas for your not-crush.”

Grian groaned, thankful when they got some orders and he could go and make them instead of continuing this conversation he wanted nothing to do with.

He absolutely did not have a crush on Scar. In fact, he could barely stand the guy. He ordered the weirdest pizzas, and some of them were incredibly complicated. He made Grian dread the Wednesday shifts and had tried multiple times to get out of them, but they didn't have enough people that could work at that time so he was stuck with the shift.

And, sure, his face always heated up when Scar smiled at him and flirted with him, and he often couldn't prevent a small smile at it, but that didn't mean anything. Each time, he told himself it would finally be the time he told Scar to stop. 

He still hadn't, but it still didn't mean anything! He just…liked the attention, that's all. And sure, he flirted back a bit, but it was basically routine by this point.

He did not have a crush on Scar.

He didn't.

[feuqueerfire]

Love Sea + Special Live Blogging

I was pretty invested in Prapai/Sky in Love In The Air even when I was frustrated by their storyline, so I'm really curious to see how this show is for them. I know bits and pieces of this show (writer with a writer's block, puppy Fort..., a side GL that everybody was annoyed with and that apparently didn't get resolution?) and I'm curious to see how it goes, I think I've seen generally good reception even if people think the story's a bit of a mess.

I'm watching this right now because I have a week of iQiyi free VIP, though I'm sure that I'll have to just note the timestamps of NC scenes and watch those later, not trying to watch it all on the subway lol

Ep 1 (Aug 22) - Chapter 1: Love Begins with the Flick of a Pen

watching their inital interaction like :D ^-^

oh, Ja! I didn't know he was in this, is it a cameo or a recurring side character?

lmao crying at the nong trying to relay his P'Mut's coolness to Tongrak

but also I hope so badly that Mut is younger than Rak by a couple years plsssss I know in LITA Prapai was older than Sky but I feel like their dynamic would be even more delicious if the age gap is like their irl one

Mut is known and beloved across the island

ahh they're really leaning into the cat Rak thing. and we've got dog Mut coming up hehe

oh yeah, I also heard something about the skin tone comments, especially in the earlier episodes. (though it seems like it's meant to be funny/satire and not actually serious here)

The Vi and Mook beginning shenanigans are kinda cute, sad to know that they apparently don't get resolved and aren't well-liked

ah, Rak's gotta have sex to write about sex lol

a dramatic reaction to Mut going into the water early on in the series to hint at trauma but also to get the couple close even though they're not in their relationship journey to do it on their own yet. but yknow what? it worked on me. they're cute

After watching this episode, I must say... how tragic to me that Peat's surgery changed some key features of his face that make him look quite different (to me at least) because I really like Peat's face and look here. At least we'll always have his face in LITA and here (glad he didn't get it done before this show). but maybe that's just me because I've seen other people talk about how it was money well spent lol

the cinematography is so pretty, gorgeous island and beach, I wish I could go to Thailand bruh. and I'm giddy watching FortPeat-MutRak, they're so good as a pair fr.

Ep 2 (Aug 23) - Chapter 2: Echoes Across the Endless Blue

I watched the sex scene before going to sleep last night because I was like I'm gonna have to skip this when watching the episode on my commute to work, might as well watch it now. However, I only watched a few minutes of this on my commute, so I didn't even get to the NC scene to skip it.

I stopped around the time Rak started sucking on Mut's finger lol

As usual, I'm kinda disgusted by all this licking and tongue but somehow I can handle a lot more with this pair than in general

Fort looks sooo cute at Mut being all confused and annoyed about sitting on Rak's bed instead of having sex while Rak writes

Unfortunately I am nothing if not an enjoyer of someone making their crush run around and do errands and chores for them so I like VieMook for now, even though Vee is rude and entitled and thoughtless - that kinda comes with this trope territory. I'm more worried about them apparently not getting resolved by the end

The money and buying Mut think is a repeating theme

Woof!

the forehead kiss from Vie didn't actually do anything for me hm

not this lmfao. and Mut being dense like "what hurts?"

ah, Mut's estranged from his father, disowned since he was 15 years old. His dad has a boat but it looks like a regular-looking boat, not a rich ppl one

Palm calls Mut Phi just in a general familiar way right? Not actual familial way.

Why did Rak jump off to do diving without informing Mut when just a day or two ago he got scared when Mut jumped off the boat without telling him... smh

oh, in this trauma flashback where he's consoling his crying pregnant friend, Rak/Peats looks like Sky a lot

I think Fort reminds me a little tiny bit of Park Gunwook

[Linguistics] Mut -> Rak: Khun. Rak about himself with Mut: Chan. Rak -> Mut: Nai

Ep 3 (Aug 24)

I like learning more about the rumours Vie faces as a female lead and how she’s faking being unaware of them + how she was doing the “oh don’t you know I’m a fragile female lead” schtick with Mook

Oh, Rak has an older sister

and his dad is hanging around presumably for money

rude as fuck Rak omg though I get he doesn't wanna do whatever Mut's planning

not the paid boyfriendship while on the island

fake dating girlfriends? well not right now it seems but maybe in the future

"Possessive of my owner too. In case you didn't know" is so akldsfjlkasdfjlk;ajdsf l;kjasdf

a little coral education

ah, Vie's forcing the fake gf thing on Mook. rip. "rumoured to be boobing my way to the top" is so funny though

Vie saying "I'm not bi" and Mook probably thinking she's straight but just has fake gf but Vie likely means she's a lesbian

environmentalist Mut

"If I'm a good boy, could you use your mouth on me next time?" i'm sooaklsdfjalksdjf

omg why is the "stay on the island" convo so good and like emotional considering we're on ep 3. it reveals so much about the characters though, the way Rak's desperate to be asked and Mut's so afraid of asking

not Mut crying omg

aw, Rak has to go even though he said he'd stay

I'm nervous about them going back to the city because people said they liked the island episodes but not the city ones. hmm

Ep 4 (Aug 24) - Ch 4: From Seaside to Skyline

"If you can't bear to say goodbye, just buy and take the guy with you" lol

they really are doing the money and sex thing hmm

poor Mook lmfao they can't stop talking about fucking, these menaces. i'm torn between she's too naive/prudish vs you actually shouldn't have to hear about your boss's sex life at work

a whole contract goddamn and the clause of it ending whenever Rak wants which like yknow obviously it should end when either party wants but there should be like a "but you still get living expenses for 1 more month afterward to sort yourself out/figure out new income" or whatever

I can't read Mut right now. is he annoyed? frustrated? feels disrespected? still into it?

sugar daddy sugar baby i would actually be cringing so hard usually but yknow what... here it's somehow ok even though it's (purposefully?) a little uncomfortable

I don't fully understand their relationship because the asking to stay and island stuff was so full of emotion but now it's like contracts and money and also apparently Only Sex No Feelings (from Rak at least)

Vie/Mook are cute here

Ep 5 (Aug 25)

the thing with the making your crush run around doing errands thing is that there’s supposed to be a breaking point where the person actually listens to their crush’s complaints and hurts or whatever. whereas it's ep 5 and Vie is still ordering Mook around

damn, so much drama with Prin. and apparently everybody in their family is obsessed with men lol. it was actually an interesting argument because Prin was clearly getting to Rak and somehow... Rak and Prin are similar?

ah, the changing room talk is good

Ep 6 (Aug 25/26)

more of Ram’s backstory and Mut’s understanding

I like it when the supposed “top” and “bottom” in different ships are friends (Kom and Mut) bc it sometimes feels like only the semes can be friends with each other and the ukes with each other lol

aw pouty jealous babies lol

childish fight lolll

Rak going to Vie after the fight is so cute. he knows that Mut caring about him feels fucking fantastic and that he’s also got too much of an ego to say sorry

Vie needs to just grow a backbone and decide to confess to Mook or smth because there’s gotta be a limit to the manipulation smh

Meena is so funny lol

damn, is Mut supposed to tell little child Meena that Rak paid for Mut's company?

finally the blowjob that Mut's been asking for for like 3? eps already. also Rak putting Mut's hand on his head multiple times was killing me omg

oh that's crazy, face fucking in my thai bl

oh, Vie speaks French?

Ep 7 (Aug 27)

I have no patience for the Prin drama

oh Boss and Noeul cameo

can’t they see that Rak’s glass is full while the glass in front of Prin is empty and it’d be difficult for Rak to reach for it?

The Boy Next World is a novel within Love Sea? ah, so Boss Noeul are also actors within this show who will be adapting TBNW as well as in real life (they’re filming right now i think?)

9-10 years age diff? lol i thought like 4-5

Ep 8 (Aug 27)

“That’s fiction. This is real life. Don’t mix them up.” Mame @ us lol

Prin and Rak’s dad teaming up how annoying

So Meena’s 13 (she really gives like 9/10), Mut is 20-21, Rak is ~30

we literally have “practicing lines” + kiss for acting trope for the lesbians oh my god. and you’re telling me they don’t get resolved after this kiss? are you kidding. also i feel like people were doing too much with the “they’re so annoying i skip the gl side plot” bc we’ve def had worse/more boring/more annoying side BL couples but alsoooo I don't understand this couple and why Vie hasn't already come clean/confessed/apologized for making Mook do all the things.

yeah Mut going along to have a chat with the dad was indeed a waste of your time and you shouldn’t have done it

the dad killed some Uncle Doctor???

Ep 9 (Aug 28)

oh my iQiyi VIP is over (~12 hours ago) but my downloaded episodes are still here? I should’ve downloaded more stuff if I’d known.

I was finding typing out Uncle Doctor a bit funny but once I heard them say Na Maw, it reminded me that in Bangla too I might call somebody Daktar-Auntie/Dentist-Uncle etc lol

nooo Rak begging on his knees in front of his dad for Mut

Kwon doesn’t seem to think that he dad actually killed Doctor Uncle but rather just took credit of an accident the doctor was in

oh yes I’ve seen multiple gifsets of Mut beating the shit of the dad after the contract is torn. “You took off my collar, are you ready to face me?”

it’s November now and apparently Mut’s been here for a couple months

Ep 10 (Aug 28)

I can watch my downloaded thing even after ~20 hours later.

bit over 1h20 minutes

Ah, they’ve gotta deal with this being a whole contract thing and Rak not being ready to face his feelings

It’s a little satisfying to see Mut be harsh with Rak at the beach after he’s just taken so many insults from Rak

I took a break and have ~25 minutes left and I think it's been a day since my VIP expired and I can't access the downloads anymore.

cute enough ending

Overall:

Mahasamut and Park Gunwook are not the same, they don't have the same personalities, but some of Mut's puppy behaviours and general mannerisms... also his age gap relationship with an older person... cute round face with built body... oh man.

Anyway.

A fine enough show, I think the dynamic and characters were interesting and the show/relationships threads were good for the main couple, especially the class difference rich/poor conversations and how their dynamic evolved. I think my SkyPrapai might still be my preferred FortPeat roles, which again makes no sense, but this one was a welcome addition, especially because during LITA I kept thinking Sky should've been the older one while Pai was supposed to be a younger puppy. On that note, thank you forever for all the puppy/dog Mut.

Unlike most people who were so over the side-GL, I was actually quite into Vie/Mook (esp because they have some tropes I enjoy, such as celeb/non-celeb and one person makes their crush do chores/errands) and kept hoping for... something to happen, for their dynamic to progress. Was there a scene of them making up cut in the last episode or something?? They didn't get a proper ending, which is sad. Vie was also such a good friend to Rak, I don't know why she was such a terror with Mook and then never progressed past it.

Loved Meena, what a cutie.

The drama of it was... okay, I guess. I get why Rak's father was such a menace (greedy bastard) but why was Prin doing all that beyond just jealousy? I do agree with the general consensus that the island episodes were better.

I keep debating 6 or 6.5 but I'll go with 6 for now because the show's writing was wobbly at some places + I didn't really get brainworms.

Rating: 6/10

Special (Aug 29)

So are Vie and Mook just supposedly dating now? Or like what?

wait, it's so fun that Rak's the one trying to do the "ooh can I get a little kiss" thing because in BL dynamics, I'd expect Mut to be the one pulling that while Rak's like noooo as if they don't fuck on the regular

It's cute to see Rak try hard with the speaking his feelings + doing things for Mut like making breakfast. a reciprocal relationship

Vie and Mook are so cute when they're clear about this being flirting or whatever

gorgeous, gorgeous girls of the world

more dog references

I'm gonna ignore Vie saying that about Mook drinking. their kiss is good though, their ep 10 kiss was also good

I love whiny4whiny when Rak's whining about wanting AC when camping vs Mut's whining that it'll ruin the experience

A cute special overall. It's about Rak and Mut's progress and lives together in the future and how they've met each other in the middle rather than random drama. Vie and Mook are cute too, it makes me sad that their story wasn't given a proper conclusion in the original series. Also, I wanna go on vacation so bad.

Rating: 6/10

[azrielslittleslut]

How are you doing today!

Do you have a list of wips you can show us? I'm just really into your writing but if not totally fine! <3

Hello! I'm doing good! I got homework done early, so now I have about 2-3 hours to write!:) (I've been daydreaming about The Lost Queen alllll day sooooo...)

Anyway, I'm so glad you enjoy my writing! That makes me so happy to hear!<3

So current wips, in no particular order.

-Kinktober fics, specifically the Eris one, which will be going up Thursday, and the Rhys drabble. I'm gonna try to have that one up by tomorrow, but it might be Friday.

-The Lost Queen Chapter 12. This is done, it's in the editing phase. It will be going up Friday or Saturday of this week.

Snippet: “Well, you didn’t have to scare the shit out of me,” you grumbled as he set you down on your feet, his hands on your shoulders to keep you steady. “Do you think- do you think I will be able to fly? Since I have wings?” Azriel’s eyes were wide as he glanced at your back, noting the current lack of wings. “If you can summon them again, I don’t see why not.” He ran a hand through his black hair, pushing the soft curls off his forehead. “You would have to learn, of course.” You nodded in defeat. “Yeah, you’re right. Maybe we should focus on Operation Defeat Evil Queen first.”

-Azriel week fics:

Cool Quiet: I'm still working on this one, but I'm taking the line from ACOFAS that says: "Most of the camp women had ducked into their homes when he'd appeared. A rare visit from the shadowsinger. Both myth and terror." I LOVE the idea that Azriel is actually a myth among the people of Prythian. That he is the one who people tell horror stories of around campfires... that he haunts people's nightmares. So, yeah. That's where that one is going.

Scarred: This one will be dark, but it's going to be a look back into Azriel's childhood. I've tried many times to write a long fic about this, so I'm going to put all of my efforts into one and hope for the best.

Belonging: I honestly don't know about this one yet. Thinking of a found-family type situation for Az? I love him with the IC, but I want to explore him finding his own people who accept him for who he is. If you guys have any ideas, please let me know!

Paid Time Off: Azriel is going to go see his mother at Rosehall. Gonna be super sweet and fluffy with a lil bit of angst.

No Need for Poetry: This was going to be an Azriel x OC smut fic, but that's changed. It's gonna be some Azris smut because I refuse to get in the middle of this horrible ship war. So i'm gonna party on the boat that will more than like never leave the harbor.

Song of the Wind: Flying with Azriel.

Free: I honestly don't know. I'll happily take requests for what you guys wanna see with this one!

Other wips:

-The Frenzy drabble where the reader enters subspace. This won't be done until after kinktober and Az week, but it's coming!

-An unnamed series about Azriel and OC F!Reader. This is super top secret for now, and it won't be started until The Lost Queen is at least almost done. Just know it's gonna be smutty, angsty, and full of Azriel healing from his trauma.

[mittensmorgul]

Your posts about The Winchesters is making me consider getting involved in the community again. I'll be honest, SPN's finale hurt bad, and I haven't engaged in or even re-watched an episode of Supernatural in two years. It took a long time to appreciate the experience and not feel like i'd wasted YEARS being so invested in something that felt like a slap in the face at the end. I miss the community; I miss talking about it, being excited, etc. But I got in the SPN tags for the first time in two years today, and seeing Dean, Sam, and Cas's faces on my screen again felt like seeing old friends:'-)

Aw, heck, well... welcome back :')

I still haven't rewatched 15.20, and I don't know that I ever will. But for the first time since it aired, watching The Winchesters 1.13 actually... let me feel even a little bit okay about it.

When The Winchesters was first announced and we learned the premise of Dean telling the story to us, I was wary. If it had started off with "so I'm dead and in Heaven and learned this stuff..." I probably wouldn't have watched, just because of that. I do NOT wanna hear about Dead Dean. I still cannot reconcile the Dean in 15.20 with the Dean from the entire rest of the original series. 40 minutes of just completely erasing all character growth and then pinning him on a rusty receipt spike was NOT the culmination of 15 years of him struggling to be free, you know? I would've noped so hard on watching him tell stories from Heaven... I really didn't want to engage with more canon that insisted that travesty actually happened.

Many of us cling to our Chuck Won theories-- that Chuck's power transferring into Jack transformed Our Jack into some weird God-Chuck-The Sequel. That Chuck The Guy was just a puppet for the actual Cosmic Power and it still had its own agenda but now there was nothing for Dean to fight back against he just... gave in to its demands and played out the story Chuck had always wanted him to.

Detour time: I've spent the last few days (while being stupidly sick and not particularly coherent as a result... hooray cold medicine brain) trying to assemble all the times Chuck talked about his writing process, what he wanted from his story, and giving up quickly because it's just so much... but I recall him saying something to the effect of "that's where I went wrong, when I tried to write myself into the story." And I think that was his failsafe-- he spent all of s15 waiting for Jack to turn himself into The Perfect Receptacle for his power, to put on that little show on the beach and take on all his power so Sam and Dean would believe they'd actually won. Making everything that happened afterward just... them thinking they were making their own choices or whatever, when they'd completely dropped their guard and all Chuck had to do was throw the Random Bad Vampires at them that Becky complained about way back in 15.04. And they'd never see it coming.

So... Dean telling the story here? I still held out hope that it would take place BEFORE the events of 15.20, when he was alive, and that the goal was to tell a DIFFERENT story from the one Chuck wanted to tell.

But the way it was all set up in The Winchesters left us open to question everything we saw, everything we were being told by Dean as the story unfolded. We had to think about it week to week, and the payoff to that? That Dean has been dead and running out of Heaven specifically in search of a world where maybe his family actually had a chance to be happy? When he was supposedly in HEAVEN, also known as PARADISE, where everyone is supposed to finally find peace and happiness? Well, that right there SCREAMS "hey, so maybe paradise isn't what it's cracked up to be... maybe something is really, really wrong in Heaven, with "Jack," with the whole concept of "peace when we are done."

Dean... is still looking for something. Something is desperately missing. His whole family is supposedly in Heaven with him, and yet why is he running through the multiverse looking for something? What could be missing?

We were *told* in 15.20 that Cas was there in Heaven, but *we never saw him there.* We were *told* that Heaven was "fixed" and all was well there, but *we did not see any of that.*

What if something very much larger is very much not right, and Dean is still looking for something? He looked so dang sad in the Winchesters finale. SO dang sad. And he was very pointedly behaving very carefully toward Jack. Like he knows he's breaking rules, or possibly even testing boundaries a little bit here... and I like the wide open possibilities of what that could mean.

I really think Dean's role in The Winchesters is effectively wrapped up. I would love to see a continuation of the series just for the characters we've grown to love there. But I do firmly see it as its own thing, adjacent to Supernatural and built from it, but with the potential to be whatever it wants to be in the future, and I love the possibilities inherent in that.

But for Dean himself? He absolutely built a high dive platform for himself to dive back into his own story from here, and I would LOVE to watch that unfold, as well. And to me, that feels like Jensen's intent behind all of this.

Will it ever happen? Golly I sure hope so...

[dbmars]

The Week from Absolute Hell

First and most important for this blog, I posted a new chapter of Bram Stoker's Hannibal.

I'm really glad I posted because I haven't been able to write much this week. My brain literally would not let me. All i could do in my free time was get lost in a movie or chat with the Hannibal Ais on character.ai, pretty much rp'ing as Will with various Hannibal bots and setting up random scenarios like "Will is working at a charity car wash!" just to see what happens.

I don't post online in general about my real life in the fandom space, because I almost feel like it's just a way to elicit attention and sympathy from people who don't really know me, which shouldn't be validating but... I don't know, can be? When I see others posting about their struggles with mental health and such I always try to leave a message of support or just a like or something, send a meme if asked, etc.

I have real supports in my life to draw on. Some real besties, despite my marital partner's lack of ability to support me the way I want to be supported (that's for another post but whatever). It's self indulgent, but here we are.

The week before this was spring break, and the family had a lovely little vacation. I did catch a cold on the road which doesn't surprise me; lack of sleep and gas station bathrooms, even as I tried to stay germ free. I have a 1yo so I knew if she caught something, I would, too. Luckily the symptoms held off until the day we left and I was miserable on the two day drive home but whatever, I was just in the car.

Sunday night/Monday Morning I have a very vivid dream about my grandmother dying in my arms. The next morning I get a text from my mom that she did die that night. I knew it was coming; she had stopped eating and was refusing it. She'd gotten COVID and didn't want to recover it seemed. She was 99 and living in a care facility and decided it was time. I was more worried about my mom to be honest, but I also had a lot of feelings to unpack. But there was no time to process, oh no. No time for big feelings -- I have 2 children, a house, and a full time job.

I felt really sick on Monday, and I was still compartmentalizing about Grandma. But I knew on Tuesday I had two interviews at my job. One was to keep my current position I've had for six years. The other was for another job I was interested in that paid the same amount as the current job but would be a fun change. These interviews got pushed to after spring break and I needed to get them done even though I felt like shit and I was emotionally messy.

The interviews happened Tuesday. They didn't go great but I wouldn't say that I bombed them. I definitely had some sickness related brain fog.

The next day I took a bereavement day to rest my body and help my mom with the plans and maybe give myself time to process. I had my day alone planned out, the kids at school, when I get a call from my boss that I didn't get either job. I was being demoted. I would still have a job that paid less, even after devoting myself for six years to this particular job.

The worst part is that they announced the new hires, and everyone retained their position but me. And they haven't finalized what I'll be doing next year so I can't say I've been offered something else. But EVERYONE KNOWS now that I didn't get either job I applied for. I feel like a total failure. I feel publicly shamed.

All this, and I manged to leave my wallet on the roof of my car and drive off. I was trying to get my child in her car seat and the email announcing the hires had just come out about an hour before and I wasn't thinking straight. So now I get to cancel my cards and try to get a new license etc.

I couldn't write. That's my one escape. My brain just wouldn't do it. So the fact that I managed to post this chapter at all is a testament to my tenacity and my loyal service to the Hannibal fandom and all the beautiful wonderful people that come onto Ao3 and Wattpad and Twitter to encourage me, take time to leave me notes and interact with me. I thought about just scrapping this whole project after 50 chapters, but I won't do that to them.