#maybe i'll fix it tomorrow after i sleeps

[jadedsundragon]

Febuwhump Day 5: Not Trusting Reality

We Forgot We Were Human (Dream SMP)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/63053656

Summary: Dream was allowed to have visitors again.

Sapnap wasn't sure how he felt about that. It'd been months since his last visit -- months since he threatened Dream's life if he escaped. After all Pandora's Vault was the place Dream needed to be in to protect all of them; Tommy wasn't the only one he'd hurt. Maybe he'd changed, though, after months of being alone. Maybe he finally knew where he went wrong. Maybe Sapnap could have his best friend back.

Characters: Sapnap, Sam (Awesamdude), Dream

Archive Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

[somegrumpynerd]

To the people in my inbox I'm so sorry I swear I'm gonna answer those but work has been absolutely destroying me for like 2 weeks straight and I've barely been here

[seawitchkaraoke]

Learned recently that not only can tense neck and shoulder muscles cause headaches but the other way around works too! So if you have a headache! That can make your neck tense up! Except that will then of course loop around to giving you a headache! On top of your already existing headache!

I did not learn this in a pleasant way

[azrielstaylorsversion]

Unspoken fights

Azriel x reader

Feyre wonders why Azriel and his mate aren't speaking to each other. Rhys explains about there unusual communication habits and she feels the need to fix it.

There were still two empty seats around the dinner table. Everyone had started eating already, not wanting to wait another half hour for Azriel and Y/N.

It didn't take much longer before they came walking in. Feyre quickly noticed them walking a few feet apart from each other. At least not as close as they usually were with each other.

Y/N walked in front of Azriel, her face showing no sign of emotion. She walked straight for Cassian's seat instead of the two empty ones on the other side of the table.

Azriel sighed softly and took a seat in one of the empty seats, immediately filling his plate with food. He didn't even acknowledge his family.

"Move." Y/N ordered Cassian, leaving no room for any argument. To Feyre's surprise, Cassian listened and moved over to the seat next to Azriel, leaving Y/N to sit next to Mor.

Cassian turned to face Azriel. His mouth opened to say something, but Azriel cut him off before he even got the chance to. "Don't even start." he said to his brother, not bothering to look at him.

Feyre watched the mated couple with concern. They never acted like this. At least not to her knowledge.

Feyre reached for Rhys mentally. 'What is going on with them?'

Rhys also watched the two and sighed, shaking his head. 'Probably a disagreement. This never lasts long. They will make up and talk about it tonight and tomorrow it is as it never happened.'

Y/N had now started eating as well, ignoring Cassians pointed look for claiming his seat. Azriel on the other hand had stopped eating and was just staring at the wall with a grumpy face.

'Does this happen often?' Feyre questioned.

'Not really. Maybe once a year.' Rhys answered. 'They have their disagreements and differences, but they always talk about it immediately. They never let it get as far as... whatever this is.'

After dinner everyone went their own way. Except for Y/N, who decided to stay in the dinning room even when Azriel had left.

Feyre had seen Azriel glance at his mate for a moment, hesitating to walk towards her before he continued to walk out.

It was well past midnight when Feyre decided to get something to drink from the kitchen. She noticed the lights in the dining hall still being turned on.

Feyre poked her head inside, finding Y/N still in the same place she had last seen her. She was staring at the wall in front of her, an empty glass of wine on the table.

"Y/N?" Feyre said softly.

She almost jumped from the sound of her voice. "Oh, Feyre. Sorry I didn't see you there."

Feyre stood in the doorway. "Are you okay?" she asked her friend.

Y/N stayed silent for a short moment, her face filling with emotion. "Yes. Everything is okay."

Feyre could tell that the answer wasn't true.

"I actually wondered if I could stay here for the night?" she asked.

The question shocked Feyre a bit. As far as she knew, Y/N had never voluntarily slept away from home. Away from her mate.

"Yes, of course. But are you sure you don't want to go home?" she still decided to ask.

Y/N stood from her seat, making her way towards the door Feyre was standing.

"I'm sure. If you don't mind, I'll be going to my old room." she said, giving Feyre a tight mouthed smile and walking past her.

She obviously meant her and Az's old room. She always called it that.

Feyre decided to leave it for the night and return to her own mate, who was waiting for her upstairs.

The next morning Y/N ate breakfast with her, Rhys and Nyx. Her mood was definitely off.

She normally wasn't much of a talker, but now she was just quiet. She also looked extremely tired, as if she hadn't slept at all last night.

'Shouldn't they be back to normal by now?' Feyre asked Rhys mentally.

'Honestly, the fact that she even chose to sleep here last night does worry me.' Rhys told me.

Feyre debated saying something about it, but Rhys warned her before she had the chance. 'They'll be back to normal by tonight.' Rhys told her promising, even when he didn't sound so sure herself.

Y/N had disappeared during the day. Probably off to her normal duties.

Feyre felt surprised when she entered the River House in the afternoon and found Y/N sitting in the living room, with no sign of Azriel.

She greeted Feyre with a soft smile before sitting down on a chair by the fire.

"So did you do anything fun today?" she suddenly asked.

"I took a walk with Nyx and helped Rhys with work. Nothing more." Feyre asked with a smile. "What about you?" she asked with hesitation.

Y/N sighed, staying silent after. Then she just shrugged. "Not really. I just feel.. I don't know."

Feyre suddenly understood why she started a conversation. Y/N wanted distraction.

"It's okay to miss him. Even it's been a day." Feyre decided to tell her. Y/N just avoided her eyes at that.

She stayed silent for a good ten seconds.

"It's just so stupid." she said.

"What is stupid?" Feyre questioned.

"This whole pointless fight. I mean I started it. I got mad about something that wasn't even his fault. And I just wanted to be right so bad." she started speaking quickly. "And I made him feel so bad and I didn't even mean it like that. I just felt jealous. And now I ruined everything and-"

"Calm down a second. You're just spitting out your words at this point." Feyre chuckled. "Why were you jealous?"

Y/N stared into the crackling fire, hiding her face from Feyre. "A Fae woman stopped Azriel on our way to dinner to ask him something. She touched his arm." she told me. "And he immediately pulled away. He was just being polite by answering her. But I still got so mad and it was just stupid."

Feyre did understand her jealousy. She had experienced it with Rhys countless of times before.

"Even after being mated for decades I still sometimes get periods where my instincts are worse than normal. Just before we entered the River House I decided to ignore him. And just to prove a point I stayed away from him last night. But now I feel so guilty. And he's probably mad at me at this point." she sounded disappointed with herself.

Feyre moved over to her friend. "Of course he's not mad at you." Feyre told her reassuring. "It's Azriel. He loves you too much to be mad at you over this."

Y/N slowly moved her eyes to look at Feyre. She nodded to herself. "Yes. Yes, I hope so." she said. "But I haven't acted this childish in years. So I can understand if he were mad at me."

"Trust me, I would've had the same reaction as you." Feyre told her with a small laugh. "Why don't we ask Azriel to come here so you can explain it to him? I'll be here if you need me."

She nodded. "Yes. That'll probably be a good idea." she answered. "I'll see if I can get to him through the bond."

It didn't take very long before the front door of the River House opened and closed. The sound of it was soft, like someone who usually came in with no sound.

Azriel definitely let his presence be known by his footsteps, which were heavier than usual.

When Azriel entered the room, Y/N immediately stood from her seat.

"Az, I'm sor-"

"I'm so s-"

They both cut each other off.

Y/N stared at Azriel. "What do you need to be sorry for? It was me who did it." she took a step closer to her mate.

"Yes, but I still have to apologize for even letting that woman get close to me, I shouldn't have."

"No, you don't need to apologize for being kind towards a woman. I could see you pull away. And she only placed a hand on you. I am the one who should be sorry."

Azriel went quiet for a few seconds. Y/N stared at him with emotion in her eyes.

Who knew that the two of them had arguments like this. I was just sitting in a chair, watching them.

"This is so stupid." Azriel said.

A small smile formed on Y/N lips. "It is." she told him. "But I understand if you're mad at me."

"Of course I'm not mad at you. I did the same thing at the start of our relationship, remember? And that was before we were even mated. So I understand." he told her. "Come here." he opened his arms for her to walk in to.

I could hear Y/N whisper some things to her mate, but I soon felt like I was invading their privacy.

Azriel noticed my awkward look and smiled. He placed a hand on the small of Y/N's back. "Let's go home." he told her softly.

She nodded and let him lead her out of the room.

She threw a quick look over her shoulder, mouthing thank you to Feyre.

[woahjo]

katsuki rarely drinks. it's not something he enjoys. but one one night, he shows up at your once-shared apartment, smelling like liquor. something sweet and fruity, liked he'd tried to wash a bitter taste from his mouth. to someone who doesn't know him the way you do, a tired sobriety may be assumed. he's that sort when he drinks.

he smiles when he sees you, a bashful kind of smile, despite not having spoken with you for months and you realize that maybe he's forgotten. maybe he's forgotten the last few months when he moved his stuff out of your place, the period of time after the break up where no one would bring up your names in front of the other.

"katsuki? it's the middle of the night," you say to him through the half open door. "what are you doing here?"

katsuki looks at you, clearly tired, and he swallows thick before opening his mouth and closing it again. you wait for him to find his words.

"i wanted to see you," he says.

"you don't live here anymore," you remind him gently, though you're not sure why you assume that he believes he does.

katsuki glances at the ground and then uses the doorframe to steady himself. you can tell that he's trying not to scare you, trying not to use the sheer size of his body. there's something cautious and equally careless about his motions and you tilt your head.

"katsuki?"

"why don't we talk anymore?" he asks you, swallowing again. you wonder where his friends have gotten off to and at what point int he evening they'd noticed that he wandered off.

the question tugs at your heartstrings as you stare at the man in the doorway. it's a pathetic sort of feeling, a weak longing in your chest. you're not sure how to answer. after the break up, things just sort of... fell off. there was nothing to say anymore.

"I want to talk to you," he admits.

this is a side of katsuki that only you are privy to. a quieter, gentler side of him. one where he can openly admit his wants and faults. an exposed bleeding wound that katsuki has never really been able to sew shut.

you shake your head a little.

"talking's hard," you tell him. you're being honest. talking to him is hard. there is so much history there.

"we used to be friends," he reasons, almost as if he's reminding himself.

"yeah," you nod, "we did."

"and now we're not," he adds. "and that fucking sucks."

you nod again.

"it's late, katsuki," you say to him. "you should get home and sleep this off."

katsuki nods, but he lingers. his eyes wander past you into the inside of your apartment, almost as if he can picture himself wandering in. you keep the door half shut.

"we'll talk soon?" he asks, something hopeful in his voice. this vulnerability makes you ache.

"yeah," you respond. "we'll talk soon. fix things."

katsuki nods and then, as if something sobering has come over him, he straightens his back. you furrow your brows as he looks at you, a pink tinge over his cheeks, and wait for what he has to say next.

"sorry to- sorry to bother you so late," he says, a little less gently. he's let a mask slip carefully over his features.

"it's fine," you shake your head. "get home safe, okay? do you need me to call someone for you?"

katsuki shakes his head insistently. "no, no," he says firmly— soberly. "i'm good. i'll see you around."

"okay."

he turns from your step and you watch his back for a moment before quietly shutting the door to your apartment. it feels too quiet now, and you briefly miss the light from the street as you turn back to the empty, darkened rooms.

you wonder if he'll remember coming to your door tomorrow and kick himself for it. you wonder if he'll wake up in the morning, his head pounding, with the mortifying memory of having shown up on your doorstep, telling you that he misses you in a set of different words. or, you wonder if he'll forget. will he wake tomorrow with no memory at all of the first conversation you've shared in months?

it's probably best if he doesn't remember it. then, there'll be nothing to follow up on and nothing to apologize for in the sobering light of day. you won't have to talk to him and be reminded of just how painful every aspect of this is. you have no intention of keeping your promise to talk soon, as much as you might like to fix things. it's best, for the both of you, if you let him fade into the background. then, you can meet him again as strangers—friends of friends—and pretend that the history between you both never happened in the first place.

[cumonstevie]

Home Sweet Home Part 2

Summary: "It's good to be home," you think as you arrive back in Hawkins, Indiana; not only three years older, but also as a mother.

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Reader

Warnings: none

A/N: Here's part 2!! I hope you guys like it! this was 4.7k words and now I'm exhausted. I'll proofread this tomorrow when I wake up <3

 Steve is still standing at the entrance of the living room, dumbfounded at the sight of you sitting only a few feet in front of him. He blinks a few times, thinking he’s seeing things but nope, there you are sitting on the couch next to your mutual rockstar friend.

Three years. It’s been three years since he’s seen you; since he’s even been in the same room as you without you scurrying off. He notes that you’ve gotten even more beautiful since the last time he saw you, if that was even possible.

His mouth is open, but no words are coming out of it. He’s just staring at you. He never thought he’d see you again. Not after-

“What are you doing here?” Eddie’s voice cuts through his thoughts.

“What,” Steve’s eyes leave yours and focuses on his friend beside you. “Can’t hang out with my friends?”

“I didn’t invite you for a reason, Steve-”

Steve glances at you. “I see the reason.”

“-so how did you know we were hanging out today?”

“Um,” a voice says from behind you. Dustin walks into the middle of everyone with his pointer finger raised and a pained look etched on his face. “I sort of, kind of, maybe accidentally told Steve we were all meeting up at your place to hang out.”

“Dustin!”

“I’m sorry!” The curly haired boy exclaimed. “I didn’t know that he wasn’t supposed to know!”

“Wait, why didn’t you invite Steve?” Robin asks what everyone else wanted to know.

“Because Y/N didn’t want to see Steve because he-” Eddie is stressing but stops himself from spilling something that he shouldn’t. “Do you guys not remember that Y/N and Steve stopped being friends? I didn’t invite him because I didn’t want to make Y/N uncomfortable.”

You’re glad he didn’t say anything more. Your friends never knew why the two of you stopped speaking and they were too scared to pry for answers so they just let it be.

However, Steve knew exactly why he wasn’t invited the moment he saw you sitting on the couch.

Poor Dustin felt bad, but he didn’t know you’d be there. He thought it was a regular hang out. The other day when Steve was driving him home, he let it slip.

“Since we’re all hanging out at Eddie’s on saturday, do you think you could pick me up and then we’ll head over?”

Steve shakes his head. “Nah, I can’t, I have a shift that doesn’t end till- wait, everyone’s going to Eddie’s on saturday?”

“Yeah, he didn’t call you?”

“No. What the hell?”

The younger boy shrugs and fixes his hat. “Maybe he just forgot to tell you. You know Eddie forgets things from time to time. He told us to be there at 5, specifically.”

Steve lets out an irritated sigh as he stops at a red light. “I’ll come by after my shift.”

Dustin is excited because this is the first time Steve is actually going to come hang out with them in a while.

His excuse for not spending a lot of time with them was because he was busy with work which was true and Robin can vouch for him on that one. He had been taking more and more shifts to make more money which decreased his free time. By the time he was finished working for the day, he was so tired all he would want to do was go home and sleep.

Wake up.

Go to work all day.

Come home.

Sleep.

Repeat.

He was doing that every day, seven days a week. It wasn’t healthy but he refused to give in and work for his father, so he did what he had to, to make ends meet.

The light turned green and as Steve stepped on the gas pedal, he grumbled out, “I can’t believe Munson didn’t call me.”

“I’m sorry, alright?” Dustin says again.

“It’s okay, Dustin.” you tell him, trying to defuse the situation. “Don’t sweat it. I can handle it, I’m a big girl.”

“Are you sure, Ace?” Eddie asks, worriedly. “I can tell him to get lost.”

“Hey!” Steve complained. “I’m right here, you know.”

“I’m sure. It’s been three years.” you tell the musician in a hushed tone.

“Yeah but-”

“He’s your guys’ friend too. I’m not gonna be the asshole that makes him leave because I’m uncomfortable. He can stay. It’s okay, Eds, really. I’m twenty now, not seventeen.”

“Fine.” Eddie sighs, turning to Steve. “Make yourself at home, Harrington.”

He looks between you and Eddie as he sits down on the couch across from you. “Thanks…”

It’s awkward after that. The silence is overbearing and you wish you could dig up a hole and throw yourself in it. You knew it was inevitable that you’d run into Steve after moving back home but you never pictured it being like this.

You’re uncomfortable.

Steve’s uncomfortable.

Robin, Jonathan, Eddie, Nancy- uncomfortable.

Robin clears her throat loudly. “So, uh, that was-”

“Mommy!” Penelope interrupts as she runs over to you. “Block!”

“Block?” you question before she hands you three blocks stacked on one another. “Oh, how pretty! Did you make this all by yourself?”

“Ya!”

“Oh my goodness, you’re so talented, Penny!” You praise the toddler and scoop her into your arms. She blushes and lets out a giggle.

Steve’s world starts spinning. It was spinning the moment he heard the toddler say mommy.

You’re a mom? Since when? And nobody told him?

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

And here Steve goes again, mouth trying to form words as his eyes move between you and Penelope but nothing comes out. You don’t even notice that he’s looking at the both of you, too occupied with Penny and her magnificent three story tower made of blocks.

You’re in the middle of praising your daughter when Eddie clears his throat and elbows you in the side.

“Ow! What the heck, Eds?” You rub your side as you look at your friend. He motions to Steve with his eyes and your mouth forms an ‘o’.

Shit, you think.

“Oh, um, Steve, this is my daughter Penelope.” You introduce, hoping no one can tell that your voice definitely faltered a bit in the process. “Penny, look,” you gain your daughter's attention as you point over to Steve. “That’s mommy’s friend, Steve. Can you say ‘hi Steve’?”

“Hi Steeb…” She gets shy, hiding behind her hands but peeking to look at the brunet that was sitting across from you.

Hi Pen- Can I call her Penny?” His eyes shift to you.

“Of course.”

He looks back at the toddler. “Hi Penny,” Steve says lightly as he takes in her facial features. “You’re so pretty.”

Penelope giggles at him then turns and points to you. “Mommy pwetty.”

Steve smiles. “Yeah, your mommy is pretty. Guess that’s where you get your looks from, huh pretty girl?”

Penelope giggles again and you feel your cheeks flush. Robin and Nancy have a smug look on their faces after his comment and you swear you hear Robin call Steve a dingus.

“Here,” you hand your toddler the blocks. “Go build another one, Penny.”

“Otay!”

Max beckons the toddler over and you watch as she runs straight to the red haired girl. Your eyes fleet over to Steve who is looking at your little girl like he’s trying to figure something out. His eyebrows are pinched ever so slightly and he looks deep in thought.

“Hey, um,” he starts slowly, trying to form a coherent sentence, “who-who’s the um… you now, the-”

“You don’t know him.” Nancy cuts him off from his blabbering.

“None of us do.” Jonathan adds.

Robin then chimes in, “Yeah, he’s some asshole that- Oops! Sorry, Penny! He’s some idiot Y/N met in Michigan who left her when she told him she was pregnant.” She then scoffs. “Douchebag.”

You visibly see the cogs in Steve’s head halt after what Robin said and you say a silent thank you to whoever may be listening to your pleas. You tell yourself that you’ll tell Steve that Penelope is his eventually but not right now, not in front of all of your friends who you’re seeing for the first time in three years. That could be a conversation for a different day.

“Hm,” Steve hums, “what a prick.”

You shrug and loosen up a little bit. “I’ve been managing fine. My parents are a big help too.”

“And now you have us.” Nancy smiled.

“Yeah,” you smile back. “I do.”

-

For the rest of your time there, things seemed to get less awkward and soon enough it felt like old times, hanging out with everyone.

You’re laughing at something Robin just said when your eyes drift over to the clock on Eddie’s wall.

“Shit,” Your eyes widened.

“What?” Eddie is the first to ask.

“It’s almost 8:30,” you say as you stand up from your seat. “Penny’s bedtime was an hour ago. Crap, I hope this doesn’t mess up her sleep schedule.”

Eddie shrugs. “She doesn’t look very sleepy to me, Ace.”

“That’s because she’s been playing with the kids.” You tell your friend. “She’ll probably crash out when we get home. Sorry to be a party pooper guys, but I gotta get home and put Penny to sleep.”

They tell you that it’s okay and you even plan to hang out again soon.

“Penny, it’s time to go.” You say sweetly as you crouch down next to your daughter. “Say bye-bye.”

She fights it for a few seconds but ultimately gives up and waves bye to the kids.

“See you guys later, alright?” You tell the Party. “Here, I’ll write my number and address down for you guys if you ever wanna call or stop by to see Penny, okay?”

The younger kids nod and you quickly find a pen and paper and scribble down your number and address before handing it to Max who was the closest to you.

“Share it.” You tell them as you pick Penelope up. “Eds,” you turn to your friend who was nursing a beer. “You ready?”

Eddie frowns as he looks down at the beer in his hand. “I’ve been drinking and I don’t want to put you or Pen at risk. Why don’t you stay the night? You two can take my bed and I’ll crash on the couch.”

You frown as well. “I would but Penny won’t be able to sleep without Bun.”

At the mention of Bun, Penelope looks at you with a pout. “Where’s Bun?”

“Who’s Bun?”

“Penelope’s stuffed animal. It’s a bunny. She can’t sleep without it lately.”

Eddie rubs his face with his hands and sighs. “Gosh, Ace, I’m sorry. I should’ve stopped drinking a while ago. How about I-”

“I can take you home.” Steve cuts him off. Your heart thumps against your chest. “I don’t mind.”

“You don’t have to, Steve, I can-”

“No, seriously.” He shakes his head. “I really don’t mind at all.”

Is this a good decision? Letting the father of your child (who doesn’t know he’s the father of your child) drive you home? Who knows. But you do know that you have to get you and Penny home soon and Steve seems like a better option than a complete stranger driving a taxi.

Your eyes lock on Nancy, Jonathan, then Robin who all give you a little frown as they nod over to the kids. Of course they wouldn’t have any space for you and Penelope, they have to take the kids home. Crap.

“Y/N?” Steve’s voice snaps you back to reality.

“Huh?” You look at him, blinking a few times. “Oh, yeah, if you really don’t mind-”

“I don’t.” He gives you a small smile. “Do you have a car seat for Penny?”

“Yeah,” you breathe. “Eddie-”

“I’ll unlock my car.”

“Thank you.”

You make your rounds, saying bye to everyone and Eddie gives Penelope a big kiss on the cheek before you exit his apartment which makes her laugh. Before you could even offer to help, Steve is pulling Penelope’s car seat out of Eddie’s car and buckling it up in his backseat. He tugs at the car seat a few times, making sure it’s secured safely before turning toward you and stepping aside.

“Good to go.” He tells you.

Steve watches as you buckle Penelope up and you kiss her forehead before shutting the door. You didn’t even notice when Steve walked around you to open the passenger door for you.

“You know you don’t have to do that, right?” You say as you slide into the seat.

“Come on, Y/N,” he smiles. “When have I ever let you open the car door for yourself?”

Never, but you're not about to answer him. Instead, you playfully roll your eyes and say, “Get in the car and drive me home, Harrington.”

-

“Make a left here then keep going straight.” You tell him and he does as he’s told.

It fell silent and the only thing that could be heard was Penelope’s soft snores coming from the back. She had fallen asleep a few minutes after you had left Eddie’s. So much for not being able to sleep without Bun..

Steve kept glancing at you every chance he had but you paid no mind as your eyes were scanning the environment outside of your window. His slender fingers rapped against the steering wheel and he tried to think of something- anything to say to you.

“Hey,” he finally says.

“Hmm?”

“I-I just wanted to say that you look good, you know? Motherhood looks good on you.” Really, Steve? That's all you got? “I mean, you’re a great mother, but I’m pretty sure you already knew that. What I’m trying to say is three years did good to you, you know? Wait, that kind of sounded horrible. I mean, like-”

“Steve,” you let out a soft laugh at his stuttering. “Three years did good to you too.”

He smiles as he continues to drive.

“Make another left up here and it’s the fourth house on the right.”

It’s silent again. You watch as you pass by all the trees in the neighborhood and Steve’s back to tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. He pulls up to your house and there’s another minute of silence before he speaks again.

“So,” he lets out an awkward cough. “Can we talk about the elephant in the room?”

You face him with a confused look. “What elephant?”

“You know,” his eyes drop to his lap and he nervously plays with his fingers. “The fact that Penelope is my daughter.”

He’s looking at you now but he’s not mad. He looks… Hurt.

It feels like all the air has left your lungs because it suddenly gets harder to breathe. There's no way he figured it out. You thought he bought the whole ‘Michigan baby daddy who bailed on you’ story just like everyone else did.

Nowhere in his facial expressions did it seem like he knew the truth, and you’ve known Steve for so long to know that he absolutely sucks at having a poker face.

“How.” You take a deep breath in, then a deep breath out. “How did you know?”

“She looks just like me, Y/N.” He tells you, shifting in his seat to face you. “And Robin told me she’s two and a half; I did the math. Unless you hooked up with someone else who looks like me around the same time we did.”

“I didn’t.” The words tumble out of your mouth before your brain could even register. “I mean, I wouldn’t. I-I…” Breathe, Y/N. “I only slept with you.”

It came out softer than a whisper and Steve’s convinced that if a gust of wind had come by, he would’ve missed what you said. Your confirmation has his brain working overtime and his heart about to beat out of his chest.

Steve’s a dad. A dad.

He has a daughter.

Holy shit, he has a daughter.

A daughter whose life he’s missed out on for almost three years. Shit.

Steve drops his head down on his steering wheel and squeezes his eyes shut. “Why didn’t you tell me, Y/N?” He suddenly snaps his head toward you. “I could’ve helped! I would’ve moved with you or-or-”

“Steve,” his name falls from your lips softly, but assertively. “Can we please not talk about this right now?”

“Y/N, this is a big deal-”

“I know.” You say. “I know it is and trust me when I say I’ll answer every question you have but not tonight. I need to get Penny inside.”

You see his eyes gloss over and you feel like even more shit than you did a second ago.

“Steve,” you watch as he bites the inside of his cheek to stop his tears from falling. “Listen to me. We can talk about this another time, okay? I promise. We can meet up at my place or yours; anywhere, okay? And I’ll tell you everything you want to know.”

Steve takes a deep breath in, then out before his eyes lock on his daughter, who is sleeping, from the rearview mirror.

“Yeah,” he nods. “Yeah, okay.”

-

The next day you decide to tell your parents everything. They knew someone from Hawkins had gotten you pregnant but they didn’t know who and as much as they pressed you for answers, you refused to tell them. You didn’t want them to look at Steve differently, despite everything that happened between the two of you.

You told them during dinner and your dad nearly choked on his food while your moms eyes grew wide like saucers.

“Penny’s father is Steve Harrington?!” Your father exclaimed after he stopped coughing. “I let that boy into my home! If I knew you two were having s-”

“We weren’t!” You cut him off.

Your father gave you a look that said ‘really?’ as his eyes drifted to the toddler who was sitting in her high chair beside you.

“It was one time, I swear!” You add.

Your father shook his head in disappointment. “One time and you end up pregnant with his kid and that little sh-” he stops himself from cursing in front of Penelope. “He left you alone to raise Penny by yourself. I never thought he’d be so selfish. How could he-”

“Actually…” You start. “He had no clue that I was pregnant. I found out after we moved and I didn’t… tell… him.”

“What?!”

“Sweetheart-” Your mom tried but your dad shook his head.

“Y/M/N, she didn’t tell him she was pregnant!” He exclaimed before turning back to you. “That was selfish on your part, Y/N. We didn’t raise you like that. No matter what happened between you and Steve, he had the right to know that he was about to be a father.”

“I know but I was scared and-”

“No buts,” your dad says. “Matter of fact, you're gonna find him and tell him as soon as possible. He has the right to know he has a daughter.”

You look down at your plate as you speak. “He already knows.” Your parents look at you very confused, so you continue. “Yesterday when me and Penny went with Eddie to his place, he invited everyone over as a surprise and Steve showed up too. He knows.”

You hear your father sigh. “I’m very disappointed with you, Y/N.”

“I know…” You murmur. “But I plan on inviting him over tomorrow so we can discuss what happens next.”

“Good.”

The rest of dinner is a bit awkward, but you pull through.

The next day rolls around rather quickly. Both of your parents head to work and you get Penelope ready for the day. You put the toddler in her high chair before walking over to the phone and dialing Eddie’s number. It rings twice before he answers.

“Hello?”

“Eddie,” you say into the phone, “can you give me Steve’s number?”

“Visiting old flames already?” You could practically hear the smirk on his lips. “My, my, you work fast, Ace.”

“Shut up, idiot.” there’s a beat of silence before you speak again. “He knows.”

“Uh, he knows?”

You roll your eyes. “About Penelope. He knows she’s his.”

“Oh my god,” Eddie says. “You told him?”

“No! He knew the whole time!” You exclaim softly. “Said it was because she looks just like him.”

“Well, he’s not wrong.”

“Eddie.”

“Sorry,” there’s shuffling on the other end. “Well, he’s at work right now so he won’t answer his house phone but I could give you his work number.”

“That works.”

You grab a pen and paper and scribble down the number Eddie tells you, thanking him before hanging up. You punch in Steve’s work number and it rings a few times before someone answers.

“Family Video, how can I help you?”

The voice is sickly sweet and your nose scrunches. “Robin?”

“Y/N?” Her voice is back to normal. “What’s up?”

“Is Steve there?”

“Yep.”

You wait in silence for a bit, thinking she’s going to call Steve over or hand him the phone, but she doesn’t.

“Can you give him the phone?” You say after a bit.

“Oh! Totally.” You assume she takes the phone away from her ear because she sounds a bit far. “It’s for you, dingus.”

“Who is it? Dustin?” Steve says as his voice sounds closer.

“No, Y/N.”

There’s a thud on the other end and you hear Robin say something but you can’t make it out.

“Y/N, hey, what uh, what’s up?” Steve sounds out of breath.

“Hey, sorry to bother you at work-”

“It’s no problem.” He speaks. “Is something wrong? Is Penny okay?”

“She’s fine.” you reassure him. “I was just calling to ask if you’d wanna come over to my place so that we could… talk.” Your fingers nervously play with the cord attached to the phone. “It doesn’t have to be right now! It could be after you get off of work or even tomorrow or something-”

“I’ll be right over.”

“You don’t-”

He hangs up before you can finish and you turn to Penelope who’s looking at you with big eyes.

“Your dad is a crazy person, Penny.”

She giggles.

As you wait for Steve to arrive, you make some breakfast for yourself and for Penelope… and maybe a little extra. Just in case, you know? You had just put Penelope’s food down in front of her when there was a knock on the door.

“Who is it, Penny?” You ask her as you make your way toward the door.

“Mmm… Poppy!”

Poppy is what she calls your father.

“Let’s see…” You open the door, revealing Steve and not Poppy.

Steve smiles as he sees you on the other end of the door. “Hey.”

“Hey Steve.” You say, moving to the side. “Come in.”

He says thanks and as soon as Penelope gets a good look at him, she yells out, “Steeb!”

His eyes are on her immediately and his smile grows bigger. “Hey pretty girl, you remember me!”

Penelope giggles and continues to stuff her face with her breakfast. You move toward the food on the counter and look at Steve.

“Are you hungry?” You’re already grabbing a plate for him.

“I don’t want to impose; I can get something later-”

“Shut up and eat, Steve. I made more than enough.”

You put the plate of pancakes in front of him and he bites back a smile. “Yes ma’am.”

He takes a seat beside Penelope and the two start eating in sync. Yep. There is absolutely no doubt that Penny is Steve’s daughter.

The three of you are enjoying breakfast and every now and then Steve will point to something on Penelope’s plate and ask her what it is. She answers the best she can and he praises her for trying. It’s like a little glimpse into what life would’ve been like if everything went RIGHT.

“So,” you clear your throat, “I think I owe you an apology.”

Steve’s eyebrows crease and he tears his gaze from Penelope and moves it to you. “What? No you don’t. If anyone’s apologizing, it’s me.”

“I owe you one too. I should’ve told you about me being pregnant when I found out instead of keeping it from you.” You say as you move a piece of pancake around on your plate.

“I understand,” Steve nods. “I mean, it sucks knowing I've missed out on Penelope’s life thus far but I-I know I hurt you, and… God, Y/N, I’m so sorry.”

“Steve-”

He shakes his head. “Please let me say what I need to say.”

You give him a curt nod and he takes a deep breath. “I know it seems like I used you that day but I need you to know that I meant it when I said I felt the same way for you. There is no excuse for me calling you Nancy after we were done-” he glances at Penelope before his eyes focus back on you. “Snuggling.”

“Pfft!” You cover your mouth immediately. “Sorry!”

“Hey, I’m not about to taint my daughter's innocent ears.” There’s a fake frown on his face before he breaks out with a smile. It lasts for a few seconds before he gets serious again. “I need you to know that I really am sorry. At that point, I think I had liked you since eighth grade and I waited to see a hint that you might’ve liked me back but when I didn’t see one, I thought it was time to move on. I was also terrified that if I told you how I felt, that it would ruin our friendship and I didn’t want that to happen because you were my best friend.”

He sits back in his seat and frowns. “Then, I met Nancy and I really liked her… but then she broke my heart and I was a wreck after that. I thought I was over her completely after all those months of us being broken up because… my feelings for you came back. In that moment, I didn’t even realize I had called you Nancy and I am such a piece of crap for doing that to you. Seeing you cry… I never wanted to make you feel like that and I’ve beat myself up about what I did since it happened. I am so sorry if I made you feel like you were the second option, Y/N. I shouldn’t have let my impulses take over when you told me you had feelings for me. I should’ve taken you out on a date, court you for a bit so you knew that I was serious about my feelings. I-I should’ve-”

“Steve.” You snap him out of his thoughts. “Take a deep breath, please.”

He nods and takes a deep breath, visibly calming down.

“I forgive you, Steve.” You tell him. “We were seventeen; we were idiots. I’m sorry for not telling you I was pregnant. I was hurt over what happened and thought you were still into Nancy and I just didn’t want to be a bother. Now I just want the past to be the past and to move forward. If not for ourselves, then for Penelope. I don’t want to dwell on what happened three years ago.”

“Done.” He agrees. “We move forward.”

“As friends.” You tell him and his shoulders slouch a bit. “I don’t think I’m ready to revisit this-” you point between the both of you. “-romantically. And I don’t mean that in a mean way. I think we should just focus on being the best parents we can be for Penelope and learn to co-parent well. Our priority right now should be Penelope… that is, if you want to be a part of her life. You don’t have to if you don’t want to, sorry for assuming-”

“I want to.” He cut you off. “More than anything, I want to be a part of Penny’s life.”

“Okay, good.” You look at Penelope who was still munching on her food. Half of it was in her mouth, the other half was all over her face. “We can talk about you coming over to visit her here? I want to ease her into this slowly. All she’s known since she was born was me, my mom, and my dad and I don’t want to overwhelm or scare her with this change.”

Steve nods. “I’ll go at whatever pace you set, Y/N. I’m just glad to be a part of her life now. And… yours.”

“As friends.” You remind him.

“Yeah,” he smiles softly, “as friends.”

Tags:

@solarbxby @nojamsonmytoast @amberpanda99 @marrowfrog00 @ladygrey03 @ok-boke @browneyedgirly93 @munsonzgf @capswife @livsters @brinleighsstuff @imstevesnailedbat @theworldscalamity @hazydespair @octoazzy @keeryverse @yvonne-dump @kjaxm @smoshyourheadin @eddiessweetheart86 @valhallavalkyrie9 @moneyy-21 @fhsbsvy @feelinglikeineedlotsofnaps @keerysfolklore @ahgrace6 @millercontracting @dangeratthebeach @baileebear @kinokomoonshine @mysticalstar30 @nanvxs @raineshua @ajeff855 @trln @flameo @spiderman-stilinski @daisy-munson @sublimepenguinpeach-blog @ali-r3n @itsnotsophiasworld

[ybklix]

stargirl

black hair felix my beloved, just felix my beloved₊˚⊹♡

★ pairing: idol!felix x fem!reader one shoot.

✦summary: After a fashion event in Paris, Felix decides to visit you at your apartment, you two are best friends, you have kissed before but you don't know how to take the next step even though you both want each other badly.

♡notes: 2022 felix in ysl event outfit.

✭ content - tags - warnings: smut / only 18+ / reader's pov / oral sex / unprotected sex / fingering / masturbation / foreplay / needy reader

word count: 6.1k

one shoot (masterlist)

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ I had a vision A vision of my nails in the kitchen Scratching counter tops, I was screaming My back arched like a cat My position couldn't stop, you were hitting it.

I gently placed my fingers over my lips, removing the crumbs from that cookie bite I had just taken. Followed by several bites, I would occasionally run my tongue, while, standing in front of my kitchen island, I flipped through the pages of my previous month's Vogue magazine... I had to confess that I was a little nervous. My mind was all over the place and my stomach seemed to drop with every passing second... still, the cookie was sweet and delicious, I couldn't stop eating it.

The sudden message notification sound distracted my attempted attention from the magazine. My cellphone was right next to it, and that's when through the screen I managed to read his name, and a message telling me to open the door, that he was outside; once again my stomach dropped with nerves and my breathing was short. This used to happen to me when I really liked someone. I think I really like him.

I didn't bother grabbing my cellphone, I just nervously smoothed down my pajama shorts and ran for the door. I was so nervous, I knew he was coming, but I didn't expect it, inside a part of me was begging for him to say I'm getting tired, I think I'll get some sleep, see you tomorrow.... Only then maybe I would feel calmer.

I didn't take any more time to think and simply opened up, finding his slim complexion dressed all in black, in front of me. He smiled at me. I smiled back and let him in.

His scent reached me in his soft breeze as he passed, every passing second was killing me, I really didn't know how much longer I would have to survive like this.

Disappointed that our greeting was just a shy smile, I followed him with my eyes. I was tired of neither of us making the first move, it's not like we hadn't kissed before... I just felt like he had this thought that there wasn't enough trust yet, or maybe he thought we couldn't cross that line yet. Agh, if only he knew… it was what I was looking forward to the most. We had spent an excellent afternoon, touring the city, I took him to my favorite places, talked like I had never talked before, showed him every useless thing in my apartment, my favorite paintings, my favorite restaurant, I was near him for hours… and still, no little kiss. I closed the door after his entrance, he walked a few steps in the foyer and turned to me, looked me up and down, frowned and said:

“Oh sorry, were you going to sleep already?”

I felt my cheeks burn. Embarrassment took over me; the truth was that after a hot afternoon, I wanted to take a bath and make myself as comfortable as possible, but in a… sexy way, to tell the truth the bare shoulders and perfectly loose pajamas were quite cute, just right, why would I feel embarrassed… a part of me knew exactly what I was doing, however the me of the moment, standing in front of the man I liked, didn't have the slightest idea. In fact, I wanted to give the relaxed appearance, as if I didn't care so much in his presence, when in reality I spent hours fixing my hair knowing he was coming, I used concealer under my eyes and richened my lashes by placing a clear mascara, light liquid blush and my favorite perfume on my neck.

“No, I just wanted to be comfortable, although you know… it is a little late” I answered awkwardly, I didn't know how to keep a conversation and he knew that, “Do you want a drink?” I tried to make him comfortable.

“Sure.”

We went to the kitchen where, in two glasses, I served us wine, because I was nervous and didn't really know what I was doing.

“I drank it quite a lot today”, he said.

I looked at him, surprised that this might not be what he wanted to drink. He was sitting on the other side of the kitchen counter as he watched me pour the drink.

“But it's okay” he hastened to add when he saw my reaction, “Champagne, wine, people, basically it was all like that.”

I opened my mouth in amazement, I was just about to ask him how that designer campaign meeting had gone. I must admit, it was quite attractive to seet him at that kind of event.

“Really? And how did it go?” asked him and took a small sip from my glass. I walked around the table, to approach him and hand him the drink.

“Good. Sit here” he suddenly ordered, pointing to the chair next to him on his left side, then stared at me.

Where had that come from? It was so sudden and so… good, I really liked it. Hearing him order me in that voice, I wasn't at all upset. He knew perfectly well that I would do everything I could to push him away, no matter how much I wanted him to, I just couldn't. So I obeyed, and like a good friend about to overhear a friend's conversation, I sat down next to him. Our knees bumped, and he kept staring at me. Quickly realizing his tone, he cleared his throat and tried to take it back.

“Ahh, to talk more comfortable.” I smiled. I liked him too much, couldn't he see it?

We were facing each other. My breath was starting to hitch again, my heart was racing and it was enough just to see the beauty of his face.

At times like this, I pray for him to go away, only then I could breathe. “So, how was your night?”

I used a soft tone and tilted my head a bit to listen to him, just acting like everything is fine. Felix let out a sigh, frustrated, puffing out his cheeks.

“You know well I was nervous, but I enjoyed it, people were so kind” he laughed softly. “It was fun, a lot of people came to Hyunjin and I, they were nice, the atmosphere was good, I guess.”

“That's good to hear.” I saw him pass his gaze to my lips quickly, then quickly divert to the counter, where he captured the cookies on the container.

“From where?” he pointed them out.

“Oh, from the bakery nearby, didn't you see it when you came here?”

“I think so, it looks nice” he smiled at me.

“Do you want some?” I asked him, to which I hurriedly stretched out my hand to reach for the container.

Felix nodded, and gently stretched his neck, opening his mouth. He waited for me to feed him. I unconsciously smiled like a fool at his action and took a cookie, handing it to his mouth, Felix laughed between mouthfuls and took it. From a sweet and innocent act it went to tension, as I suddenly felt his heavy gaze, fixed on me, as he delicately licked his lips. Felix. Making me go from one emotion to another. Does he know how nervous he makes me? I'm sure he does and I'm so embarrassed.

“Tastes good.”

I smiled at him. With nothing more to say, I thought for a few seconds until he spoke again.

“So you didn't go out today?”

I shook my head.

“I came here and wanted to rest a bit.” Felix let out a light chuckle, then took a sip from his glass. I must admit, I memorized every little detail of something that only lasted three seconds… it was like in slow motion. Him, with his elegant build, dressed in a way he regularly doesn't, his shiny black button-down shirt, his formal black jeans, his hair still perfectly groomed despite hours of a tedious social event… the way his arm came up and the glass came to touch his mouth, gently closing his eyes and stretching his head back. I was absolutely lost. Absorbed. I averted my gaze as fast as I could when I realized he wanted to captivate mine.

“And… Hyunjin… didn't he want to hang out?”

Felix looked down for a second and gave a half smile.

“Not really… he said he wanted to rest. But I did want to come and spend some time.” He looked at me once more. This time I could feel the tension and the incredible magnetism in our flimsy bodies. Under the glowing light of my kitchen. Just the two of us. Was it me or was his breathing getting heavy? I smiled at him. Again, out of words to which he added:

“I wanted to see you.”

I froze, I swear if he touchs me I can turn into a liquid state. Still, I pray for him to do it. Now. I watched his fingers play with the cup, and the seconds seemed eternal. I didn't know what to say.

“Wanna listen some music?” he suddenly interrupted, clearing his throat and putting his hand over his fingers.

He quickly stood up on his seat. I looked at him confused; Felix headed for the turntable in my living room.

I soon realized, he may have felt uncomfortable, unrequited. I should have said something, silly me. Why doesn't he just take me, can't he see that? Why doesn't he just...

“I listen to it a lot for my French class” he said cheerfully, showing me the cover of Edith Piaf's album.

I smiled warmly at him as I approached him. One thing about Felix is that he would act as if nothing had happened a few seconds ago, just like me, one of the few things alike that we shared.

“It's fun to learn with music.”

“True... but I don't feel in the mood for Piaf's...”

“How about…” he turned, searching through the albums until finally showing me one, “Yes.”

My smile widened so suddenly.

“Lana? Really?”

“You say it's always a good time to listen to her.”

I wanted to capture him in that moment. Him holding my favorite album, with a smile, taking it gently.

“And it is.”

Nervously, without thoughts, I sat down on the couch. The first few seconds are a kind of crunching sound emitted by the record player, it's so... satisfying, then the best part started: the guitar of cruel world, the song. I closed my eyes tightly, hiding my excitement.

Opening my eyes I found a smiling Felix, approaching me, then sitting down next to me. If I thought about it, Felix's all black outfit, his dark hair, matched the album aesthetic completely.

“I love that song” I told him.

“I know. You love all of them.”

I looked sideways at him as I blushed. The song with that slight crackle was so special, I hadn't heard it in a while. I'm obsessed again.

“I'd do anything to hear it for the first time. To erase my memory and... experience it again.”

Felix laughed. I was so happy to hear Lana that I unconsciously moved closer and closer to him.

When the song ended, suddenly it caught my attention that he got up from the couch to go get his phone from the counter, where he stayed for a while, apparently just texting. I sighed, and decided to approach him. He was acting strange out of the blue, I thought he liked me back... I have to prove it before I build up any more stupid expectations.

Felix laughed and kept on texting. It was no big deal. He was confirming his schedule with someone on his staff for tomorrow. Or so I read. As I steped back, slowly, I saw his relaxed expression, and his adorable profile. Well, if I didn't do it now he would leave with nothing but a void in me.

I tried to pretend to check my phone too, but nothing was getting my attention.

“Felix” I called for his attention.

He raised his eyebrows, as a sign that he was listening, but he wasn't. His eyes were glued to the phone screen, his fingers typing nimbly. He looked so good doing the tiniest thing, still, I wanted his attention.

“Felix” I called him back, to which he unexpectedly locked his phone, placing it on the table and stared at me.

He folded his arms, looking relaxed. He was leaning on the edge of the table, facing my living room. Good. Now I had his attention. It took me a few seconds, I tried to captivate him, to let him feel the atmosphere, to which, then, feeling the blood rise in my cheeks, I let out a small laugh at the phrase however I dared to tell him:

“Do you want to kiss me already?”

He thought about it the shortest second and the next, finally, he drew a shy smile on his face, moved closer to me... and I felt his lips on mine. I could die right there.

His hands took hold of my waist and pulled him closer to his body. We were pressed together, moving our lips slowly, enjoying ourselves. I tried to stand on my tiptoes, as my arms wrapped around his body as well. We lasted like that for a sweet minute, his right hand ran from my waist to my face, where he placed his hand on. We looked at each other. The glance after the act was always….

I didn't have time to think. He interrupted my thoughts as his lips crashed into mine again, but this time it was more passionate, quick, desperate. I think we had only kissed like this once before, and it ended up leaving me totally craving something more.

I felt the warmth and softness of his fleshy lips brush mine; this time his grip was stronger, and his hands torturously roamed my body, my back, waist, caressed my hair, I felt his hands touch my flimsy silk pajamas, and I noticed the coldness of his shirt buttons and belt sticking to me. I tried to keep up with him, but suddenly his tongue made me open my mouth wider. He was initiating it.

I just wanted a piece of him tonight, before he walked through that door, before I went to sleep sad that I didn't tell him how intensely I felt...that I wanted him. But this felt so intimate, special. I hope he can finish what he's starting, my legs don't respond, I can hold on because of his strong grip and I feel my temperature rising.

Our breaths shorten. We manage to separate, but Felix looks serious, focused. Then the torture continues, he follows with light kisses, at the corner of my lips, around my face, my lips, the tip of my nose, at one point in his actions, our hands intertwine and he continues, teasing me. He knows I'm impulsive and may take his lips in a desperate act; but I didn't feel like doing it now, that little moment felt so right, lovely, warm, perfect.

Slowly, his kisses came down, each brush felt like a prick, it's sharp, startling, pleasurable pain. My breathing was getting faster and faster and I can hear the throbbing in my ears... for a second I thought if he is feeling the same. But I couldn't get a good look at him. He deposited kisses on my jaw all the way down to the neck. So this was how it was going to happen. I thought.

I couldn't help but feel the sudden violent throbbing in my lower part. Shit, this time I was already wet. I was aroused and I was dying to know if he was feeling the same.

His perfume overwhelms me and the brush of his nose kills me. For a second it's not about sex, it's not about the incredible urge I have for him to take me, remove my clothes and have him do with me in sudden frenzied actions of his, to cry and scream... for a second... it's about the art of touching skin to skin. I needed him. To feel him close. So close. To breathe in his scent as I lay my head on his shoulder, making me his. It was almost as if this whole process was so tedious, I wanted to be under his skin already. To feel wanted by him.

I was about to regain my composure until he came to give me kisses on my shoulders. I was just asking over and over again in my inner thoughts and cries, please take off my blouse.

He grabbed my butt and again pulled me into his body. That's when I opened my eyes a little in surprise as I finally felt him and, I realized, we were both aroused.

His cheeks were colored with a slight reddish tinge and his hands traveled from my ass to the inside of my blouse, where he roamed my waist. The cool touch of his rings against my warm skin made me let out a soft moan, one that managed to make Felix smile broadly.

Once again we found ourselves kissing, but now slowly, delicately and passionately. His hands were finally touching my skin, sometimes he would bring his hand up and I felt his thumbs play with my nipples, he would squeeze my breast and, I had to admit, I loved it. But it frustrated me at the same time.

As we parted, in a quick act due to my frustration, I boldly removed my blouse and threw it on the floor, letting Felix see part of my naked body for the first time and, giving him the green light, that is absolutely happening tonight. I wanted it so badly. I wanted him to see it all if it's possible.

He opened his mouth slightly in surprise, I let him watch for a few seconds and before he could make the next move, I stepped forward, giving him another quick, passionate kiss, then I was the one moving down his neck and then to his slight bare chest. As I did so I could hear Felix's heavy breathing close to my ear, followed by sighs of frustration, exasperation and the occasional slight moan in his deep voice, which really turned me on more and made my legs lose the strength to stand there, standing in front of him. My bare breasts brushed against his silky shirt and I felt the pressure of his hands caressing my bare back, occasionally pushing my loose hair away from my face.

Finally I managed to unbutton his shirt, I stretched it a little to get it out of the grip of his belt and left it open; I saw his flat and worked abdomen, stupidly I ran my hands over it, feeling it; Felix let out a chuckle with an arrogant tone, to which I quickly raised my eyes and he stopped laughing, even so, he returned a sweet smile, one that ended up melting me.

Unsure, I started moving down, depositing kisses on his chest then his abdomen... if I kept moving down this would have a consequence, so I hurriedly and nervously, directed my hand to his erection, where I gently touched it on his pants. I looked up to see Felix's reaction, but he was already closing his eyes, letting himself go. I squeezed it some more, massaging it, this time Felix moaned. From one second to the next, I was on my knees. In front of his notorious bulge, about to do what it's excpected.

Felix leaned back agains the table a little, relaxed his body and with his left hand began to gently stroke my hair.

When my breathing was becoming uncontrollable, choppy and irregular I was starting to like it more. Just like now. With trembling hands, from excitement and nerves, I unbuckled first his belt... then the button of his pants, his zipper... before pulling it down, I looked at Felix, who was watching me from above, even at that angle he looked so good. I think I had fantasized about seeing him in this position... me pleasuring him.

“Do it” he said to me, in a frustrated tone, almost in a gasp.

His voice became deeper than normal. He licked his lips and waited to be satisfied.

My knees were losing resistance, and the pulsations in me were getting stronger and stronger. My mouth began to produce more saliva and I felt my cheeks burn intensely.

I finally pulled down his pants where I found his erection on top of his underwear, more prominent.

I wanted to play his same game, and I kissed slowly over the fabric, stuck my tongue out moistening him a little and used my hands. It was soft and hard at the same time. Meanwhile, I heard Felix cursing in a low tone and sighing. But I couldn't resist that little game anymore, so I pulled the elastic of his underwear, and I had to turn my face away, otherwise he was going to slap me. I closed my eyes for a second and then opened them to finally see him. I blushed instantly, perplexed that this was actually all happening, me about to give him a blowjob... and I used to be so shy around Felix.

It was perhaps, better than I had imagined, perfect length —I think even a little bigger than I thought— perfect thickness, color and obviously kept the area clean. Shit, it looked so good.

I directed my left hand to his straight, firm manhood, feeling the texture of his skin, going up and down, stroking his tip with my fingers, until I reached the other end. Meanwhile my best friend lifted his head back in pleasure with muffled moans.

Before I felt it in my mouth, I wanted to feel it on my lips. I wanted every end of me to feel his texture... I was pretty sure this was going to keep me happy for quite some time... and of course, his love and understanding, I hoped.

I kissed it once, then opened my mouth, closed my eyes and ran his length across my lips. His warm, stiff, throbbing sex was finally at my disposal, his pleasure was now up to me and the thought was enough to make me wet again. I could be on my knees, below him, but I still felt that all the power belonged to me now.

Without further ado, I held him with moderate force and began to lick him, moistening and lubricating him... from his glans to his base, tentatively taking his balls from time to time and at last, I was ready to take him into my mouth. Concentrating on not ruining it, I sucked hard, using my tongue and making him rub the softness of the inside of my cheeks. He seemed to love it.

That's when I noticed a weak Felix, surrendered and letting himself go, holding more and more to the kitchen counter with his hand and the other one not letting go of my hair.

I continued my work, in, out, from shallow... to trying deeper, pulling him out, flicking my tongue and when I felt my jaw hurt, I used my hands.

Felix's moans and gasps were getting hotter and hotter. But nothing compared when he moaned my name in his voice, or when he let out little whispers, like this, it feels good, it was the best music to my ears, even better than the one that was playing in the background... it was priceless, the feeling was on another level. I wanted to be his already.

The atmosphere was burning, nothing around us could turn us off, he was totally lost to the pleasurable sensations and desire. His moans were so hot, blending together with the music and the grotesque sounds of his penis in my mouth, it was all too much that I couldn't help but run my hand slowly over my body, traveling over my tits, pressing them, imagining it's him, finally him, until I reached my wet spot. I was dying to be touched, but I had to stop myself. I really wanted it to be him this time.

Felix noticed my groping, bit his lip and, between the incredibly deep look of lust —a dark, piercing, serious yet brilliant look, my new favorite look of his— I noticed his intentions to stop me and take me. To touch me.

But I didn't want to. I didn't want to stop until I saw him cum. Climax. For me. And only for me. I wanted to see him made a mess just for me. If that included having to hold out a little longer for his touch, I would hold out.

I kept up my work for a while longer, keeping a rhythm, speeding it up, feeling every outstanding vein, his skin texture and fat vibrating cock inside my mouth and sliding down my tongue. Tears were starting to come out of my eyes, my nose was about to get runny… I was so turned on that if he didn't cum, I would at any moment. I swear his moans, the strong grip on my hair, loud sighs and gasps as he called my name were enough for me. I was going crazy.

I could tell how much he loved to be pleasured, the movement of his hips was slight, and his little pushes and pulls on my hair were gentle; just Felix always being so considerate.

Until I felt salty droplets of his pre-seminal fluid coming out of him, lubricating the area more, making it slippery, I knew he was going to cum soon. So I continued, harder.

Felix's moans began to change suddenly his ahh was getting deeper and steadier, his legs were getting weaker and that's when I suddenly felt something warm shot my mouth, followed by a loud exasperated moan from my best friend, fuck, he yelled. He filled my mouth, dripping semen on the edges of it.

I was surprised, but I couldn't help but smile in satisfaction, seeing him fully yielding, with his head back, I was just looking at his bare abdomen, his long neck and marked jaw. I withdrew my mouth and hands slowly, still a mess was made, one that didn't bother me at all, after all it was what I was looking for. His semen fell a little on the floor and there were drops on my chest; I didn't know exactly what to do so I thoughtfully swallowed it. After all Felix was a guy who kept his diet healthy, just someone to trust I guess.

I looked up and found Felix staring down at me from above, at a fucking hot angle, with a cocky grin, he said with a husky voice:

“Did you just swallow it?”

My cheeks burned in embarrassment, I was already hot, and my face already had that pink tinge to it; but for some reason I felt the intensity of the color rise, I didn't know what to say, I was suddenly back to my shy self; was it wrong?

His hands searched my cheeks and lifted my gaze. Quickly, I stood up, never breaking eye contact.

“You're too good. Good girl.”

Still, I was still so horny and wanting so much more. Felix smiled at me, moved dangerously close to me and with his thumb wiped the semen beside my mouth, ran his finger across my lips and made me open my mouth, tasting him one last time. I would never have thought Felix would do something like that, I was surprised and delighted. At the end of the day he was just a little older than me, I guess there is more sex experience in him than I know; I was dying to know.

Without hesitating, he took me by the waist and sat me on the table, the cold, hard marble stone it was made of made me moan. This time Felix had no time to waste, so he pulled hard on my shorts and panties, leaving them lying on the floor and me, completely naked and vulnerable in front of him. I quickly glanced down at my body and then stared at him, his chest still rising and falling from heavy breathing, his gaze turned darker than usual and he still looked focused.

I blushed, he only moved closer to me, separating my legs to accommodate his body and began to kiss me, but now his hand was holding my neck tightly and the other was squeezing and playing with my breasts until he reached my wet pussy, where I put my legs together a little and gave a little jump of surprise when I felt his fingers pass through my area.

I confidently opened up more and more to Felix and wanted to enjoy his touch. I felt two of his slender fingers run up and down, until they found my clitoris, which made me moan in between the kiss, making me shudder, making my nipples hard and, by uncertainty, bringing me closer to his body. Finally he squeezed it and began to make movements, up and down and then circularly. He pulled away from me, but his face was inches from mine. I saw in detail his serious countenance, his pink lips with their perfect heart shape, the freckles scattered across his face and the hair falling a little to his forehead beginning to unkempt, our eyes meeting again.

I held myself with both hands, placed firmly on the table, but I felt small in front of him, I felt like he was now in total control of me. My muscles were contracting, my stomach was enlarging and shrinking from my breaths and constant sighs of excitement… his touch made me swoon. He continued like this, a few painful minutes in which I felt more and more of my climax until he moved down and inserted two of his fingers. It felt so good, with his thumb he kept caressing my clitoris and wet labia; he kept his rhythm, without being rough, it was perfect. I closed my eyes and let myself go, still wanting more of his touch.

“Does it feel good?” he said in my ear in a husky voice.

He smiled broadly. I knew it filled his pride and he liked knowing he was good at what he did, if not the best. At times I was afraid this would happen, Felix can be a bit of a perfectionist, yet he seemed to handle it very well, he cum for me and just now I was watching him masturbating himself. His hand was going up and down and pulling hard his cock, he seemed to be a little rough on himself. He looked so good. I suddenly realized, I wanted him inside me right now.

Felix caught me watching him, removed his fingers from me and began to tease me, rubbing the head of his erect penis over my wet, throbbing lips, pressing and slapping it. I just groaned in frustration.

“Do you have a con…?”

“Do it like this” I interrupted him, aroused.

Felix frowned, confused and unsure of his next move.

“They're in my room. But you can really do it like this” I tried to calm him down and persuade him.

I didn't want to walk to my room for a condom and I didn't want him to come off me right at the best time of night either. Yes, I was thinking stupidly and one little mistake could be forever but those were problems of the future, now I was here, next to him, ready for him to fuck me.

Then, the thing I craved so much, he pushed it into me, slowly until it was all inside. Felix grabbed my waist, pulling me closer to his body, feeling his length deepest in me. I let out a moan. Him inside me felt so good, so right.

And then he started with the non-stop movements, the thrusts. He started slow and when I felt it, I asked for him to do it faster. The sound of our bodies colliding was beutiful. Felix in one swift movement gracefully slid his shirt off, throwing it to the floor, leaned towards me and I couldn't help but touch his naked torso. His arms his back, and his thin silver chain dangling, moving. It felt so good I had forgotten what an incredible dancer he was, he had amazing control in his hips. His thrusts were strong, deep and steady, each one deteriorating me, destroying me, in the best possible way.

My breasts were moving up and down and Felix was moaning and panting freely near my ear. Everything was wonderful. I managed to wrap my legs around his body and stroke his soft hair, I was feeling so full and full that I could predict my climax at any moment. He felt it, my legs trembling, my muscles shrinking, my back arching and my eyes watering with my grip on his back tighter, my inner walls felt so hot, wrapping his hard dick tightly.

So, before I could cum, he kissed me, caught my lips, passionately. And I climaxed, this time moaning louder than the previous times and one more time… calling his name.

Felix didn't cum yet, but he seemed happier for my reaction as a half-smile appeared on his face. He continued inside me but now in a more delicate and slower, almost romantic way, until he pulled his erection out of me, resting it on my belly and came.

I was trying to catch my breath, as was he, for a few seconds we said nothing. Until we looked into each other's eyes and we both burst into laughter. It was bit funny because evidently we both wanted to have each other so badly.

I got off the table, thinking, this doesn’t have to end yet, I feel sticky for the fluids and a little embarrased. Since we were here, there was one more thing I wanted to do, well, hundreds, but right now I was only thinking of one. I want to jump on his dick.

“Let's go to my room”, I said, taking his hands, almost in a plea “Take off your clothes.”

Felix still had his pants and underwear on, only they were both pulled down. Without looking back I walked to my room, almost jumping of happiness. I waited for him, sitting on my bed. I was wet and ready again just thinking about it. Felix came in a few seconds later, shy, blushing and covering his area, as if I hadn't seen it all before. I laughed slowly and he sat down next to me, on the edge of the bed, so with a nod I told him to settle in nicely, with his full body to the bed.

Finally we were both naked, ready to give ourselves completely once again. I spread my legs apart one on each side of him, putting my body in front, and kissed him again. That unique kiss that we loved to give each other so much, passionate, strong and intense. My hands went down from his abs to his already hard cock, playing with it a little. As we parted, I looked at him, and confessed:

“I want to feel all of you again, Felix; is that okay?”

That meant I wanted to feel every raw texture of his hard cock inside me, every inch rubbing all over my guts.

He looked at me, so fucking cute with his big brown cat eyes; he nodded shyly.

I smiled and put it on. Slowly, teasing him. I played a little, rubbing it in my area, rubbing it, just like he did. Letting myself fall gently on his cock, stroking it over my cunt without putting it inside of me yet, moving slowly back and forth, Felix closed his eyes in pleasure, and I couldn't hold back any longer, I was just getting wetter and wetter, my area was was throbbing, ready to ride my best friend's cock.

So I stared at him.

“Now it's my turn” I said.

I had this theory that Felix liked to be slightly dominated and, evidently he liked to have the attention to him and I seriously liked to give, so it was a perfect dynamic. And without further ado, I settled him right into me. Felix moaned and his hands held my waist tightly.

Then I started to do it finally, what I wanted so badly after all. I jumped on him, slowly moving up and down… as I felt his hands run up and down my body, damn it was excellent. My cheeks once again burned and I felt slight sweat break out on me. Felix seemed to love it and that was just what I wanted. I rested my head near his neck for a moment, breathing in his scent and feeling his soft hair on my nose. I had him just the way I wanted, close to me.

Once again, the beautiful, grotesque sound of our skins colliding mixed with our pleasure-filled sighs and moans. Until culminating in my second orgasm and for him, his third. The sensation was so indescribable and more when you’re together with the person you wanted.

We hugged. Felix gave me a tender kiss on the cheek as he stroked my arm and hair. I expected nothing more from sweet Felix than adorable after care; he was just like that.

I think I was going to sleep next to him for the first time. Internally I squealed with excitement and returned the tender kiss on his cheek.

[verstappentime]

@sunsetmog & i have gone deep into the sugar baby daniel rabbit hole so here's max trying to upgrade dan to full time sugar baby. it helped me feel better on my dreadful monday so y'all should have it as well <33 (read hers first)

Max is already out of bed when Daniel gets up. He's exhausted and heavy and sore. He feels like he could sleep another eight hours. Max would let him. But he has to go back to work tomorrow and he's not going to see Max for weeks and weeks after that. He's not in bed and Daniel misses him already, right now.

He wanders out into the kitchen. Max is perched at the breakfast bar, eating cereal and watching something on his phone, which is propped up on a book. Daniel keeps telling him to just put a TV in here, so he can stop sitting hunched over like a gremlin, but Max is hard to make do things if they're not for other people.

"Hey," he says, and watches Max's features soften when he looks up.

Max struggles getting off his barstool, all stuck to it, in a rush to see him after probably, like, an hour. They're so embarrassing. He's so in love it hurts.

"Baby," Max says, sounding wounded. He touches Daniel's cheek, frowning like something's not where he left it. "You look so tired."

"That's alright." Daniel likes that Max notices him. He just– doesn't like that look on his face. "Am I still pretty, then?"

"Don't be stupid. You are of course very gorgeous and handsome." Max is still scrutinizing him. "But you are here all weekend and still tired."

"Yeah, well. I'm kind of in a deficit. I'm just. Gonna." Daniel brushes his hand off, not harshly, stepping around Max to pick out a mug and go for a latte.

He likes this new espresso machine. He's seen on the package delivery app from his apartment complex that Max got him one for his place – he's going to pretend to be surprised when he gets back.

Max is still hovering. Daniel lets him chew on whatever's bothering him. He rummages for sugar and debates between the four kinds of non-dairy milk Max got for him without turning to look.

"Are you alright?" Max asks, finally, as he's pouring milk into the frother.

"We established that I'm tired, Max. It's okay. Maybe I'll nap later."

Max wraps both arms around him from behind, forehead against the back of his neck. "I think maybe it's not going away," he says.

He can't cry, but he wants to. Max has never been with him during a bad spell. But he'd warned him. I won't want to do anything. I might need you to be a bit mean to get me to eat or shower. I'll be tired but sleep won't fix it.

"I'm just working too much." It sounds stupid.

Max says what Daniel's thinking. "It can be both." He pulls away. It doesn't sound like he's going to push it. "Can you show me how to do the coffee? So I can do it for you."

He breathes out. "Yeah, okay."

&&&

Max is skipping his training routine, and he doesn't say why.

He stays in with Daniel on the couch, and they watch It's Always Sunny, which Daniel can't believe Max has never seen and makes him nearly choke on his Red Bull.

It's good. He feels a little better after his coffee. They're good.

Max has been tracing loops on his thigh for awhile. He thinks one was a love heart. It means Max is thinking.

Dennis is about to tell the gang he's leaving, and it's important, but Max pauses the TV. He says, "Don't go back to work tomorrow."

"What?" He's out of PTO. Max knows that. They've gone over it ten times. "You know I can't–"

"Don't go back. Tomorrow or– don't go back. You don't have to. You don't have to worry about money. This is stupid." Max squeezes Daniel's thigh, urgent, which is about the only thing keeping his head from spinning off. "This is going to make you unwell and I don't want– there is no point when I can take care of it."

[voxslays]

THE SPINDLE

Featuring >>> Lucifer x Reader; In which, an attempt to kill baby Charlie goes south. Resulting in a soporific curse placed upon the reader, who struggles to deal with the aftermath of its affects.

A/N: It doesn’t happen this chapter, but y’all know it’s coming next chapter. Sorry this chapter is so short- I’ll release the next chapter tomorrow to make up for it.

Part Two Part Four

After being told you may never recover and there was no cure, Lucifer and you were distraught. However, years passed without anything happening—sure, you were still tired all the time—but you made it through, and for a while it seemed like you were getting better, like the curse was through some miracle disappearing. As the years passed and you showed no signs of entering an eternal sleep, Lucifer began to hope that the curse had somehow faded or been broken. He watched you closely, waiting for any sign that the tiredness would win, but you remained stubbornly awake. He started to believe that maybe, just maybe…the doctors were somehow wrong.

Yet, despite all the doubt, suffering, and mild depression—you managed to hide the symptoms of your curse from your family. What they didn’t know, couldn’t hurt them…right? Lucifer’s loving gaze follows your every movement, studying you intently - something you've noticed and tried to hide from. The subtle darkness under your eyes, the slight delay before you respond to questions, the forced enthusiasm in your voice when you help Charlie with her homework.

Speaking of Charlie, with the help of Lucifer, you had raised your daughter into a beautiful young teenager. She was now sixteen years old…and in her goth faze…which both you and Lucifer had tried to talk her out of, when she angrily yelled ‘It’s not a faze!’ and you both left her alone. However, it seemed like she was growing out of that emo phase. She wasn’t even wearing black this morning! And today was a very special morning—it was Charlie’s sixteenth birthday!

Outside, your Imp servants were setting up a giant outdoor pool party for Charlie and all her friends while you and Lucifer sit inside and eat breakfast. As you sit at the table, Charlie bursts into the room, still in her pajamas. She rushes over to hug you tightly, nearly knocking you out of your chair. "It’s my birthday, Mom!" She exclaims, her face flushed with excitement. “I know my sweet apple.” You coo as she sits down next to you. “Are you excited for tonight?”

“Yes!” Charlie squeals as Lucifer chuckles warmly, watching your mother-daughter interaction. He reaches across the table to squeeze your hand. "Don't wear yourself out today, sweetness. You've been doing too much lately." He gives you a knowing look, concern evident in his eyes. “Luce, you know I’ve been feeling better lately.” You smoothly lie through your teeth. He narrows his eyes slightly, clearly not fully convinced. "Have you?" His voice is gentle but probing, knowing all too well how well you can hide your symptoms.

“I have.”

Sighing softly, Lucifer lets it go for now. He knows pushing the matter will only lead to an argument, and he doesn't want to ruin Charlie's special day. Instead, he turns his attention to your daughter, who is already bouncing in her seat with excitement. “Alright, alright, calm down.” He says as he watches Charlie bounce up and down. “Charlie go get ready for the party!" Lucifer laughs as he stands up and ruffles Charlie's hair. "I'll go make sure everything is set up out by the pool." He kisses your forehead before heading out. “Lets go, shall we my little apple?” You slowly rise from your chair as Charlie practically jumps out of her chair and follows you to her room.

As the afternoon wears on, you find yourself growing more and more exhausted. You try to hide it, putting on a brave face for Charlie's sake, but it's getting harder. Finally, as you're helping Charlie fix her hair, you can barely keep your eyes open. “Hey mom, can you go get me my dress?” Charlie asks, unaware you can barely keep your eyes open. “Of course, sweetheart.” You quickly leave the room, praying that nobody notices your exhaustion.

You walk down the large red-carpeted hallways, with regal golden design, hoping to find a room to hide in until you’re feeling better. Unfortunately, your devilish lover walks down the hallway at the same time as you. Seeing you stumble slightly in the hallway, Lucifer's concern turns to worry. He quickly makes his way inside, finding you leaning against the wall for support. "Sweetheart, are you okay?" He asks softly, his hand reaching out to steady you. "You don't look so good."

“Just tired.” You yawn, holding your hand over your mouth as if to contain your exhaustion. Lucifer’s eyes scan your face, noticing the dark circles and pale skin. He knows you're pushing yourself too hard, and it's taking a toll. "Tired? You look exhausted. Maybe you should rest for a bit before the party starts." You sigh, not even trying to fight your prideful husband—who was not so prideful at the moment, his golden eyes showing fear and concern. “Alright.” You take his hand as he leads you deeper down the hallway.

Once you reach your bedroom door, Lucifer picks you up bridal style and carries you like a princess to the giant king-sized bed. He helps you kick off your uncomfortable shoes and tosses them aside. Gently, he makes sure you're comfortable on the bed before pulling the covers over you. "Get some sleep, okay? I'll take care of everything else." And for a moment you close your eyes and rest.

[thatmexisaurusrex]

Fuck it, Babes! I'm Fixing This in Denial-verse!

You know what? Like the song title that started this fic says, "Say No More", Tim. You don't see the joy in BuckTommy? You don't see the love and happiness in Tevan? You aren't interested in the stable relationship that is Kinley? I got this. I'm okay with taking Happiest-We've-Ever-Seen-Him-Buck and Fantastic-Boyfriend-With-Baggage-Tommy off your hands, good sir!

It feels apt that I named this fic Denial-verse 😂 That the singers of the song are called Fickle Friends. We had a good canon run. There's a lot of wonderful stuff there. And okay, are there one or two minutes at the end that we have to change? Not hard to do. Take my hands, babes. We're going off the paved roads, onto the beaten path of fanon by the end of this.

I get it. I was reeling. It hurt. I was hurt. It wasn't fair or kind. It was honestly cruel in its execution. I didn't get sleep. I've never lost sleep over a show before. It was wild. But I listened to the song that inspired the first fic in this series originally recently and I just smiled because - fuck it.

I didn't know where this was going back then either.

I thought it might end at any moment.

I'm happy with what we have despite the bullshit that happened. It's more than most ships I love get. And I've never hated writing in the realm of fanon. Why would I hate it now?

I'm actually a little excited. I don't have to worry about whether shit I make up is going to contradict canon anymore.

Now, as my goal in Denial-verse always is, I will be sticking as close to canon as I can. But I won't be ending it like it ended on the show. This might get a little angsty, but I promise you a happy ending. I'm always good for a happy ending.

I don't know who wants this. Maybe I'll be the last clown sitting here reading the end of this epic I didn't intend to write. But fuck it, if I'm the last clown at the circus, I'll be happy.

So.

As the song goes, "Paradise, I'm your beholder!" Now, get "caught in this denial" with me and let me "show [you] the way"! 😆

Be ready for some Denial-verse soon! Possibly tomorrow or the day after!

[peachway]

the perfect sunrise · CL16

✦ characters - fem!reader x charles leclerc ✦ warnings - fluffy fluffff, suggestive, google translated french, so let me know if i have done any mistakes :) ✦ word count - 1.2k ✦ summary - Charles forgets your birthday so to make it up for it he kidnaps you to see the most beautiful sunrise.

A/N - The written birthday note here is from pinterest and is highlighted in italics. The pictures are curated from pinterest. happy reading ✨

Third Person’s POV -

You were currently in the hotel room. Alone. The silence and the ticking clock were killing you. You glance up to see the time.

“You’re late” you mumbled seeing it was already 12:44 AM.

It was your birthday. You thought you'd be surrounded by your loved ones and your boyfriend, celebrating like crazy till morning, but it was quite the opposite. You already had tons of wishes from everybody. Except for him. Did he forget? no it's wasn't possible. But as the time went by, it got very obvious. He indeed forget your birthday.

It was obvious to feel hurt. You weren't angry, but just kind of disappointed. You understand how demanding his career is but you had hoped, at the very least, that he would've remembered the day.

The distance between you—the hours spent in different time zones, the constant travel has already made the relationship a challenge.

At first you thought he was just pretending. It was the last race of the season so you thought maybe it must have slipped his mind or something. It was not at all possible that he had forgotten your day. But the fact that it was almost 1:40 in the night and he was still out somewhere you don't even know?

You had already dozed off on the couch waiting for him. When he was coming back to you, he ran into Pierre in the hotel lobby.

'Hey mate!' Charles gives a little nod.

'Oh hey! good i found you here. I was going to call you.." he says.

"Is y/n still up? because Kika wanted to give her a little surprise and she didn't pick up her phone so.."

"I actually don't know, I had gone out so... i'll call you." Charles nodded.

"You were out alone?" he asked.

"Yes?" he nodded.

"You do know what is today right?" Pierre asked again.

"Yeah, a Wednesday. What's the matter why are you asking so many questions?" Charles retorted.

"Mon Dieu Charles!! it's her birthday!" Pierre said with gritted teeth.

Then it finally clicked him.

“OH NO”

“TODAY'S DATE” His stomach drops as realisation took hold of him. It's not just any day—it's your day!

“Super travail d'oublier l'anniversaire de ta copine! idiot." he cursed himself. [Great job forgetting your girlfriend's birthday! idiot.]

“How the hell did i forget that.. I'm sorry I-” he shook his head to Pierre.

“It's okay mate. Don't worry about us. Good luck!" he patted his shoulder.

“Hoping you'll still be alive for the race tomorrow.” Pierre smiles and walks away.

In the fast-paced world of Formula One, he'd somehow lost track of one of the most important date. In the face of his mistake, he knows that mere words and gifts won't fix it. He has to do something meaningful.

You were still sleeping when he picked you up in his arms and carried you away from the hotel room to the car. You did wake up in the middle and saw the harbour. But you brushed it off thinking it was a dream. You clutched on tight to Charles and went back to sleep.

It was very early and with all those planning and preparations Charles fell asleep too. His eyes flew open abruptly after some time.

When it was almost 6:40 he gently rubs your shoulder to wake you up.

"Hey." "Amour, wake up." he cooed.

You responded in a little hm, not waking up fully. You wanted to sleep more.

"Y/n" he calls again.

When you didn't answer he started peppering kisses all over your face and neck. This time you did wake up feeling his soft lips against your skin.

"Charlie!" you giggled.

"Amour." he replied, his face still buried in your neck.

"It's almost time." he added.

"Time for what?" you ask, opening your eyes as you hear ripples of waves around you.

Instead of the white ceiling of your room you see the almost golden sky. You jolted up in thrill. You were in the ocean. Like literally in the ocean?

You look over the sea and see strokes of deep orange, pink, and golden yellow shade glooming over in the sky. The sky was lit and the sun was peeking out from the horizon. You could hear the sharp calls of black headed gulls from a distance followed by some other waders and seashore birds. It was so blissful. You look at Charles who was admiring the view before him. His perfect face looked more beautiful in the golden glow of the sun. His blue eyes were the deep ocean you'd want to drown into. You couldn't have awakened to something better on your birthday than this.

"You like it?" he asked.

"It's so gorgeous." you smile looking over at the ocean.

"happy birthday my love." Charles whispered in your ear.

"I thought you forgot. But you had this planned? This is the best surprise i can get. Thank you Charles."

"Cherié I..." he starts but doesn't continue.

"Yes?" you said.

"I am a horrible horrible boyfriend. You see... I um did forget your birthday." he said.

You didn't reply back but isn't just pulled his face and gave him a soft kiss, gesturing that you accepted his apology.

"Normally i would get flowers or your favourite cupcakes but it's very early so i'll start with this.." he says pulling a little piece of paper beside him.

It had small hand drawn flowers all over it with a little note that said,

"yesterday, i loved you. today, i love you. tomorrow, i will love you. next week, i will love you. in june, i will love you. on september 5th, i will love you. when i get home, i will love you. next year, i will love you. in five years, i will love you. for the rest of my life, i will love you.

happy birthday belle!"

"I'm not much of an artist but i tried!" he chuckled awkwardly, slightly embarrassed seeing his messy watercolour flowers on the card.

"It's so perfect!" you said, tears forming in your eyes.

"Hey! no crying on your birthday come on!" he said pulling you in his arms.

"Well it's not a birthday if you don't cry." you chuckled.

"Yeah not today, cherié. I have so much planned that you won't have any time to cry." he said.

"Can we please stay a bit more here?" you asked.

"Of course whatever you like!" he says stroking your hair.

"Your voice is so damn sexy. It makes me want to go down on my knees." you said, your head still buried in his neck.

"Whoa hey that escalated!..not that I'm complaining!" he chuckled.

"But it's your birthday so, i'll take care of you my pretty girl." he added.

"No! me first!" you protested climbing up on lap.

"This is so perfect. Thank you Charles." you said kissing his lower lip.

At the end of the day, it's not just the perfect race win or the fastest lap that matters alone but being with you, after every good or bad race — it mattered him the most. Coming back to you in your arms mattered the most. You were his home and he was yours.

[insidekatmind]

Clingy bf~ Bukayo saka

It was one of those nights when the silence of the house was broken only by the clicking of your laptop keys and the creaking of the chair every time you moved slightly. The warm light of the lamp illuminated the sheet of notes next to you, and the essay you were writing seemed endless. It was almost two in the morning, and you had no intention of stopping.

But then you heard slow, muffled footsteps on the floor. A moment later, a pair of arms wrapped around you from behind, warm and familiar.

"Please, baby," Bukayo whispered in your ear, his voice hoarse from interrupted sleep. His lips brushed your neck, his breathing slow and deep. "I can't fall asleep without you."

You smiled slightly, but didn't look away from the screen.

"Babe, I have to finish this essay," you replied in a gentle but firm tone. "Go to bed, I'll be there as soon as I'm done."

You heard Bukayo sigh heavily behind you, his chest rising and falling against your back. He reluctantly let go of you and sat down next to you, elbows resting on the table and his gaze fixed on you.

“How long are you going to take?” he asked, trying not to sound impatient or too needy, but the way he drummed his fingers on the table gave him away.

You sighed, running a hand through your hair as you looked at the clock on your laptop. There were at least three pages to go.

“Maybe an hour… or two,” you muttered, half-heartedly.

Bukayo groaned in exasperation, making you giggle. “Two hours?! Honey, can’t you take a break? Just five minutes. I promise I won’t bother you again.”

You looked up at him. His dark eyes stared at you with that pleading sparkle you knew so well. His face was soft, slightly puffy from sleep, and his unruly curls fell over his forehead. He was irresistible.

“Bukayo, really, if I don’t finish it tonight…” you began, but he cut you off, leaning closer with a small grimace.

“If you don’t finish it tonight, you’ll finish it tomorrow,” he said, tilting his head to the side. “You need to rest. You’ve worked too hard this week.”

You heard his thoughtful tone, and guilt began to creep into your chest. You knew he was right, but the anxiety of completing everything in time was holding you back.

He seemed to sense your internal conflict, because he reached out to intertwine his fingers with yours. “Look, five minutes,” he repeated softly. “Just to be together. Then you can go back to writing, if you want.”

You hesitated for a moment, but then let out a defeated sigh. “Five minutes,” you agreed. "But not a second longer."

A huge smile spread across Bukayo's face as he stood up and tugged at your hand. "Deal."

The two of you made your way to the couch, where he pulled you into his arms, wrapping a blanket around you. He lay down, pulling you on top of him, and you rested your head on his chest.

His breathing was slow and steady, and you could feel his heartbeat under your ear. His fingers began to play absentmindedly with your hair.

"You know, it's not fair," he muttered after a few minutes.

"What?" you asked, your voice already slightly more relaxed.

"That your essay gets more attention than me," he said with a fake pout in his voice. "I'm jealous."

You burst out laughing. "Really?"

"Yes," he replied, holding you closer. "But I'm willing to forgive you… if you take me to breakfast tomorrow."

You looked up to meet his eyes. "Deal."

Bukayo smiled and closed his eyes, resting his head against yours. "Goodnight, love."

"Goodnight, Baby," you whispered. The sage could wait a little longer.

[roosterforme]

I just saw the post about Darlin joking about him using a walker if they had a third baby.

I feel like Jake would have a real big doubt and guilt in himself one night about being too old for her. Maybe one day they're playing with their boys when the two are maybe like 6 and 3 and Darlin says she misses them being really small and now they kick and squeall when they get kisses because it's like icky.

That night maybe Jake is sitting on the side of the bed as Darlin gets in and she senses something is wrong and he asks her if she was with a younger guy would she have more kids as he feels he's holding her back. He definitely has a bit of self doubt as the daggers always tease him about being the old man of the house.

Btw love I adore your little blurbs for this fam. Today is probably the day I might catch up on a bunch but they are amazing 😍

Oh, ouch. Yes. It would hit him sometimes that maybe certain things would be easier or better for you if you had a partner closer to your own age. (angsty below)

Your husband was one week away from turning forty-seven, and he just absolutely rocked your world in bed. "I like it when you do that thing with your tongue," you whispered, staring up at the ceiling as he sat on the edge of the bed, naked.

His back was to you now, but you heard him chuckle. "And I like it when you do that thing with your tongue."

You rolled toward him and groaned. You were going to be sore tomorrow. "I'll go check on the boys before we go to sleep," you said, kissing him when you stood.

After your robe was securely tied, you walked quietly in to check on both Liam and Asher who were sound asleep. Then you went back to your bedroom where Jake had barely moved an inch.

"They looked extra cute when they're asleep and not fighting over Legos or eating all of the food in the kitchen," you mused, dropping your robe again. "I kind of miss when they were tiny and didn't know how to argue."

Jake cleared his throat. "Would you want to have another baby? If you could?"

You stared at him, unable to read the expression on his handsome face. It was closed off. And you were confused.

"I don't understand," you told him, placing your hands nervously on your hips, suddenly very aware of how naked you were.

"Just answer me. Would you have wanted more than two? Would you have wanted to try for a girl?"

You swallowed hard and shook your head slowly. "You got a vasectomy. I wouldn't even be able to get pregnant again."

Jake ducked his head and looked at the floor. "I wanted the vasectomy, because I'm already the oldest parent in Asher's school pick up line."

You took a step closer. "Who cares about that? You're also the hottest dad in Asher's school pick up line."

He looked up at you and whispered, "Will you just answer the question?"

"I already did!" you snapped. "We decided about the vasectomy together. Last year. You didn't make the decision alone, Jake." His eyes were fixed on your face as you said, "I have never once looked at you and thought you were too old to do anything. I didn't want more kids. Some days I can barely handle the two we have."

You burst into tears, crossing your arms over your chest as you turned to get your robe from the floor again. Jake's arms were around you, pulling you toward the bed, and you let him take you there. "I didn't mean to make you cry, Darlin'," he whispered. "I just hate the idea that I could be holding you back."

"You're not," you sobbed, face buried against his neck as he pulled the covers over both of you. "All you do is make everything better. The boys and I woudn't want it any other way."

Jake held you until you felt calmer, his fingers trailing up and down your arm. "I won't doubt my wife again," he whispered, turning off the lamp.

"Don't you dare."

You fell asleep to the sound of the ocean and the feel of Jake's big hand on your back.

[daenysx]

hi lovely

2:16 am with james potter?

2.16 AM | JAMES POTTER

"here it is, beautiful." james puts a steaming mug on the coffee table next to you. "try to drink it while it's hot."

"thanks, jamie." you say. your voice doesn't come out like it usually does, you think the sudden chill in the air has a bigger effect than you think. you're not sick, not really, but you feel tired and your throat is getting sore.

james could prefer sleeping earlier tonight, he has a practice at 8 am in the morning. after hearing your poor, sick voice; he decided it could be nice to have a hot drink and some cuddles which you adore all the time. he's gonna take care of you until you feel better and make sure you won't be sicker tomorrow morning.

"you should be sleeping." you say. "i promise i'll finish this and come to bed."

he cups your cheek with a warm palm. "who's gonna hold me when i sleep if you'll come later? i'm staying with you."

the tea is nice, james put a lot of honey in it. you could find it too sweet normally, but right now it's like a balm on your sore throat. you try to drink it without burning your tongue, your eyes following james as he gets you a blanket to cover your body.

"how's your head?" he asks. "do you think you'll need painkillers?"

"no, it's okay." you answer honestly. you would tell him if you actually need it, you know he'd be upset if you try to undermine the situation. "it's only my throat now, and my bones kind of feel achy."

"poor baby." he whispers, he leans into your space to give you a nice kiss on your forehead. you don't have a fever. "i'm gonna fix it all, maybe i just need to fill you up with more tea, huh?"

you laugh. "it's amazing how you think hot tea will solve all your problems."

"um- at least having tea helps when it's cold." he scoffs. "no more drinking iced latte, okay? it's not warm enough for that anymore."

"yeah, but i'm kinda attached to drinking it emotionally." you pout a little. "hot drinks don't feel the same."

"you've been talking about this with sirius, haven't you? he's just like you, drinks that ice cold coffee every day. you both need an intervention."

"remus can convince him, i'm sure." you say. "and you can convince me, if you try hard enough."

james will take this as a challenge. he kisses your neck softly, you hold him with your free hand. the tea really helps and james hugs you until you fall asleep when you finally made it to bed.

[hoshinasblade]

i am in a depressive episode, the next posts will not be very fun

being hoshina soshiro's best friend comes with obvious perks. among that long list is his ability to always be available in your time of need. maybe years ago you would think this is just normal - people who care about you are usually only one call away. unfortunately for you, being on the other end of hoshina soshiro's kindness - even as just a friend - bears a consequence: the possibility that you will fall in love with him.

and fall hard for him you did.

it is the fourth time this month that he is picking you up drunk from a botched double date. hoshina doesn't know why you keep on agreeing to be set up to random men by your officemates, and he pondered on asking you once but ended up shutting up about it at the end of the day. your dating life is not his business even if he wanted it to be.

"i got her," hoshina assured your girl friend as you clung to his shirt. he had ample time to change from his uniform and in a rush, worn the first thing he got his hands on from his dresser. "i'll take care of her. good night."

"if you're gonna get drunk all the time, at least ask me out for some shots too," he mumbled, knowing that you can hear him but will most probably not understand him. after fixing his seatbelt, he turned to your side to secure yours. this close he couldn't even smell the alcohol on you, just the scent of your shampoo and the fading perfume on your skin.

"you awake?" your eyes were closed but he couldn't tell if you were sleeping. he waited for a few moments only to be met by your silence.

then you sighed deeply and exhaled from your mouth before speaking. "i like you, did you know, soshiro-kun?"

it did not even sound like a question at all; it lacked the intonation, it was missing the curiosity. hoshina knew that it doesn't matter if he knows you like him - right now, you are confessing; right now, you wanted him to know.

it would explain a lot of things too, really. it never takes you more than an hour to respond to any of his messages during the day. shamelessly, you have also put him on your speed dial - "only important people get to have this honor", you reasoned. you always say his name in such a way he had never heard anyone else do.

hoshina grimaced.

"i know, you already told me thrice this month now," he responded. he expects you will forget the entirety of this conversation tomorrow anyway. he was about to start the engine of his car when you stirred. "i wish you would tell me that when you're sober," he said before driving away.

[threepandas]

Bad End: We Are

Senatus was a ecumenopolis. The "shining jewel" (yeah, right) of the Galactic Core. Please. Like? Maybe it was! If you were RICH AS FUCK. I don't know. I'VE never seen the towers. The heights. Most people haven't. Street level? Is about FIVE HUNDRED FLOORS DOWN. And the UNDERGROUND? Speak not of it.

The Underground GROWS.

What was street level today, may not be tomorrow. Levels buried under "progress" as the rich grow ever higher. The Tox levels ever worse. Air quality dropping. Why fix the peasant's poverty and despair, when you can buy a Sky garden you'll never use? And yes, I AM bitter as a Buirian fish ration. Just as salty too. Taste the SEA, motherfuckers.

Rent? Who can AFFORD rent!? Who can afford ANYTHING?!

It's some BULLSHIT.

But me? I remembered. A life. Before this one. Before the millennium of slow, drip drip drip erosion of duty and dues. Back when people still REMEMBERED what they were OWED. And when folks in power failed to pay up? Ffffuck um. Take it. Our house now, motherfuckers. Diplomacy was a courtesy not a weakness.

....I make people nervous, honestly.

Probably why I keep getting fired. That and my constantly reporting people to regulatory boards. Maybe don't break the LAW if you don't want to get in trouble you SHITS. Fuck you! Yes, I stole your fancy office chair. PROVE IT. You don't know how the security system works!

Where was I? Ah, right. Rent.

Fuck Rent.

Thing is? What! Is a biodome? If not an enclosed system, regulated by machines, for optimal habitability? And! What? Is an Deep Underground Level? Long forgotten? Abandoned, if you will~, if not? A complete enclosed environment? Does someone OWN them? Yes. Technically. But are they MAINTAINING them? CHECKING on them? Nope!

Common knowledge, after all, says that EVERYTHING down their is "beyond salvaging"!

Free Real Estate~☆

I just need some supplies. Which? Cheaper in the long run then RENT. Especially if ya' salvage um. Maybe steal some tool sets from your shitty, shitty Mechanics job, because your boss refuses to pay you. Who can say? Not me! I just FOUND these tools! Like maaaagic~

And really, one man's junk? Another man's treasure. I pay more then the trash company. Hit up the right cleaning companies? And? Oops. They've "lost" some of those SUPER broken righ folks "junk" that? At best? Just needed a few wires replaced, resecured. Maybe a new part. Or were, you know, not the latest and greatest anymore.

Shove it all in a storage locker? Sell the refurb'd shit I don't need? Sleep in a glorified shoebox? And?? Bam. Operation "fuck ya'll, i'ma moleman" is a go. It takes FOREVER to find the right WILDLY out of date (and long abandoned) lift, but I find it! Hidden away in a service area in some crumbling, forgotten corner of what once was a rail station.

Gonna have to fix THAT up too. Later, though. First? The lift. The wires are brittle and the lift's pully system is half rusted, frozen, or otherwise broken. Luckily, the car itself is fine. It... takes a bit of research. Not going to lie. It's far from my specialty. I even call in a professional to go over my work.

They catch a few things. Not immediate concerns, but would have been fatal in the long run. Money well spent. For my hobby, of course. Fixing up old bits of the city. Which is a weird but not impossible hobby to have.

Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies, my dude.

First thing down? Lights, melter, and duraplast sheets. Toolkit too, for obvious reasons. Same with my full body hazard suit. I go DEEP. Like... no longer can hear the city, deep. 'Bout halfway point. Takes nearly thirty minutes. And while not a fast lift? Holy SHIT, man.

The floor I step out into is... bad.

Dead in a way that's hard to explain. There's pressure against my suit. Centuries of heavy gasses slowly working their way down. Swirling in the silence. The dust and impossible dark. My headlight feels almost... sacrilegious. Dangerous. Like I'm waving a flashlight around some ancient burial ground, filled with the not so restful dead.

I had heard... that they? Just... just LEFT droids down here. That there were levels upon levels of dangerously feral machines. Slowly rotting away in the darkness. Probably rightfully angry, that they had been built to serve, to do duties, which they HAD done... only to be consigned to hell on earth for the sake of CONVENIENCE.

I'd be mad too. Fucking LIVID. Would remember and hate, never let it go.

This was no place of honor, it was a tomb.

Still, I got too work. Set up a light by the lift and started measuring out the original air box. The air cleaners could only handle so much. And THIS? This was worse then expected. So it'd have to be smaller then originally planned. Fair enough. I could work with that.

I outlined the space in lights. All the better to make it easier to put things up. Then got the folded later and started securing the duraplast. First step, get it up. THEN melt it to the metal. Get a good seal. It took... a while. Was slow, steady, sweaty work.

The filters couldn't run until they had a an enclosed space TO run in. They'd just blow out, trying to filter the whole level's toxic atmosphere. I kept an eye on my air supply. Not great, not terrible. The readings though? Horrific. I had no idea what I was gonna DO with the filters when they needed changing. These kind of chemicals would set off all SORTS of alarms.

But? No use, rushing things. That was a great way to get a fatal leak somewhere. No. Slow and steady. Even though, third of the way through, I did have to head back up. I needed to refill my air. Eat. Drink. Maybe de-stink a little, from being in that suit all day. Possibly nap near the lift.

ALSO? Update my shopping list to include some heavy duty neutralizers.

Just filters wasn't gonna be enough. I was gonna have to hose down everything INSIDE my new air-box, then scrub it HARD. How fun. Well, it's not like anyone was making me do this. It was MY mad idea, after all.

So? I refuel, get bright eyed and fuckin' perky, and go back down to face the beast.

Honestly I should have brought a telebook or something. Well, audio book. But that's not what they call um these days, so I try to stick to the lingo. I sound less like a deeply insane antique. Confuse less people. Joys of basic communication and all that.

Part of me? Wishes I had been born closer to "The Plot". Creation's specialist, most favored, Blorbos. But? The common SENSE in me? Routinely laughs hysterically as it waves fifteen different restraining orders and a crucifix. Not even religious. Yet here we are, shouting "BEGONE! Sataaaaan!" in HD, on the inside of my head. Not sure it helps.

See... it's the fucking DRAMA~☆™

The shear, unmitigated, high octane, Otome Game DRAMA.

I would fuckin DIE or, possibly and, kill somebody. The endless string of selfish, selfish, poor life choices? Driving by luuuuuuv~♡? Give me your spleen. Gonna beat somebody unconscious with their own SPINE. I RAGE. Lack of communication? No one just picking up a fucking PHONE? God forbid ANYONE tell their families their not DEAD IN A DITCH SOMEWHERE!

No. No just inconvenience EVERYBODY and RUIN LIVES. It's okay! You're in LOVE!

That makes EVERYTHING BETTER.

I would inevitably launch them all out an airlock. Spend the rest of my life in jail. They AREN'T WORTH IT. I may have LOVED this game in my teens? But I did not die a teenager.

Now? Now the little shit just aggravate me. They are baby faced pretty boys who presume WAY too much. Arrogant and entitled. Boys playing at being men, thinking their little love stories are the only things that matter. Their feelings are the only thing in the universe that holds any weight.

Unsurprising, really.

Seeing as how their little love story is set mostly in The Towers.

A rich, pampered, pretty little backdrop where nothing of weight is real. No one starves and no crimes are ever committed. Everything shines. Power pools thick like honey. Nothing but sci-fi prince's and alien dukes, a dewey eyed Protagonist sheltered and naive.

Her oh so shocking misadventure to the mid-levels. How SCARY! Downtown! Poor people! Not even the destitute. Just? The EXSISTANCE of dirt and noise, beyond her ivory towers. Thank goodness she is saved by a handsome, rougish bad boy. Who shows her the "real world" of a carnival and a noodle shop.

I finish securing the last duraplast sheet to the ceiling, walls, supports, and along the floors. The "entryway" to the rest of the level is set up. A click together shed I've made air tight. Gonna have to get a air lock system for it. Won't hold forever, with those materials, but should work for now. Combine it with a decontamination system, and I should, in theory, be able to safely enter and leave the rest of the level in a hazard suit.

Moment of truth time. I click on the first of the atmo-filters. It heaves under the strain. The sound getting less aggrieved with each one I flick on. Their screen are already in the red, flashing warnings that I should vacate the area. That the air is dangerously unbreathable. I'm probably gonna need to replace the filters in them in days instead of years. It'll be worth it.

Heading back up, I let them run. It'll take a few days. Besides, I need those neutralizers.

I, of course, DO find um. Just in time to watch Poor Guy (middle class, at worst) Love Interest become a wanted man. They use the BIG screens to announce it. Gee, it's almost like having your only daughter, who is highly sheltered, NOT show up at the designated pick up site? Instead be witnessed in the handsy company of a scoundrel? Which is WILDLY unlike her? Might lead a protective father to some wrong conclusions.

If ONLY someone had CALLED him! To TELL him "Daddy, my first shuttle was broken and I think I got on the wrong back up shuttle! I don't know where I am!" Then this would just be an unfortunate meet cute with the boy he doesn't think is good enough for her. Not, you know... A Kidnapping.

The Chem seller looks just as baffled and annoyed as I do. Apparently knows the guy's uncle's second wife's first husband. No shit? How's he like? Happier, huh. Whole family is like that? Yikes. Glad he got the kids, I guess. Good for him.

We watch as it turns into a high speed chance that absolutely didn't need to happen.

Thank FUCK it's not us.

I spend the next few days deliberately and obstinately ignoring the Dramatic Bullshit that has taken over the news cycle. Fights on rail cars? Don't see it? Weddings that are, then aren't, then ARE happening? Oh look, missed a spot in my scrubbing. Someone fucking tearfully monologing about love as they nearly CRASH A SHIP into downtown, killing hundreds of thousands? Oh that creaking noise is just my teeth, ignore that, I grit my teeth a lot for NO PARTICULAR REASON.

This Is Fine.

I am TOTALLY CALM.

But hey! I can FINALLY empty my storage unit out! Air box? Get! Wooooo! Size of a tiny apartment and everything! As long as I keep working on it? I'll be able to reclaim the level in chunks.

It's like moving in day! But BETTER! Because... because I did this. Me. Is it still creepy down here? Yeah, very. But I can FIX that. I am standing, here, in my new air box "apartment", with NO hazard suit on. And... and it's SAFE. Because of the work I DID.

I kinda want to cry about it, you know?

So many options! Do I put my bed here? There?! Oooh, I could put the folding table HERE and make sort of a dining area? Maybe use these folding screens as a double "wall" slash headboard stand in? I should get plants. Fake ones? No. Real ones. I could get solar lights. It would be good for me too. Oh! Where should I put the cook top?

I admit it. I fuss. Whole day, gleefully wasted. Arranging then rearranging. Getting everything just right. Finding ways to hang my fairy lights. Looking up decor magazines. I have so much ROOM now. A whole level to plan for, ultimately. It... it feels kinda like hope. The first thing that isn't frustration and rage, I've felt in a long, long time.

Going to sleep? I'm happy.

Next day, I head to the BIG archives. The ones attached to the fancy Towers Library. Is it costly to get in? Yeah. But I've saved up enough questions and research topics for the trip to be worth it. I ignore the started glances I get (gasp! Is that a POOR?!) and head straight for the helper droids. Only decent folks in the building, really.

Brought my pad and everything. So it's only a matter of being lead to the right terminals, to download the information I need. Chatting with the research droid the Library had, they offered to do it for me. Bring me a fascinating new research paper on some sort of telepathic moss that had recently been discovered. Not gonna lie... that DID sound fascinating.

I asked if they could put other interest new discovery on my pad too, assuming I still had room once my list was downloaded. They looked gleeful. No idea what I just signed up for, but all right then. They've never steered me wrong before.

Finding a table to sit down and wait was easy. There was always way too many. The paper? Was exactly as fascinating as advertised. The moss was on a newly discovered moon, edge of uncharted space. Nearly ate a researcher, apparently. I was entranced. Or... at least I WAS. Until an obnoxiously familiar high end cologne from Nox drifted to my nose.

Oh god damn it.

I didn't want to look up. Knew what I'd see if I did. Fetishist Sr., crown prince of Nox. See, the second prince? HE was a love interest. Younger, boyish, infatuated with naive and sheltered girls. He loved AT her. Just like his brother. They liked the IDEA of their romantic partners. The narratives they built in their head. Heros of their own stories with sex on line. Never framed so crudely of course, no, no!

No, it was Romance™

My ass, it was. See, little brother wanted his pure, naive, princess to protect. But Prince senior? HE'D stumbled upon me in here in the library. On one of my trips, God help me. The rough, mysterious, brutish Poor. The Commoner, for all that such things were not supposed to exsist. With my strange clothes and stanger ways. Yet? I was NOT as his sycophants no doubt described.

I was educated. I held myself with dignity. I did not need jewels or finery to be lovely.

With such incredible audacity, I was bold.

Which? OBVIOUSLY had to be for HIM, right? Clearly, this was a LOVE STORY. Cinderella. It is inconceivable that I, a peasant, do not crave the attention of my betters. To lift me from my woeful indignity, to a higher state of being. A life of spoiled luxury. But, ah! He is so SHY! How ever will he approach the Love Of His Life~?

I want to throw something. Go awaaaay. My body language could not POSSIBLY be more uninterested. I am SO CLEARLY reading. Stop trying to catch my eye. Don't you FUCKING DARE scoot closer. Swear to God, if you drive me out of the best library in the region? I will stab a b-!

The helper returns with my pad, sternly eyeing my annoyance. Oh, they are a BLESSING. I take it and go. The helper smoothly stepping between me and the prince when he tries to rise, follow me. Aaaw, how sad, you have to behave like the REST OF US. Get FUCKED.

Rest of the day? Planning. Grabbing more broken bits, machines, and parts. Neutralizers by the literal barrel. Than YOU hover carts! Best invention, favorite invention. Saves SO MUCH TIME.

Even managed to get some sun lamps. Nice.

Getting home though? (Ha ha, wooo! I have a HOME now! Land ownershiiiiiiip! Sorta!!!) Is a pain. Lift is only so big, after all. But it is, what it is. Up, down, up, down, uuuuup, and dooooown. Finally! Last load! FREEDOM! Can't watch my shows, yet, but I will! Oh mark my words. I WILL. Meantime? Downloaded seasons are fine.

I eat, fiddle with fixing things, as listen to tunes. Watch some of my shows. Just as I have countless times before. Until... halfway through mid-afternoon? Something shifts, jerky and wrong, out of the corner of my eye. I pause. Turn off my music. Stare to make sure I DID actually see something. And... yeah. Yeah, that was definitely movement.

Didn't look animal though, not like one would survive down here. But who knows. Could be a poacher brought an alien species. So it might be. I grab my flashlight, aim and switch it on. Holy SHIT. That is one incredibly beat up floor clear. Or at least... I THINK it's a floor cleaner? It has the general shape of one. Bigger though. Bulkier. But that makes sense, given it's gotta be well past obsolete.

Still. Poor thing looks beat UP. Listing terribly, sensors beyond cracked and clouded, probably full to dangerous levels. No idea how it's still functioning. But, well, it IS. And it needs help.

Getting up, I grab my hazard suit and pull it on. Grab my "outside the air box" tool kit, which I haven't had a chance to move yet. I grab some parts i look like i'll need, hope I wont need more. Then head out my makeshift airlock. It... works. Rattles concerningly. But it DOES work! So there's that. I approach the floor cleaner slowly. Since I'm PRETTY sure? All the droids down here are feral.

I am correct.

It tries to kill me. Swinging it's suction hose violently and trying to ram me. I talk in a low, soothing voice. Just want to help. Won't do ANYTHING you don't want me too. It's hard to move, right? That's frustrating, isn't it? You don't deserve that. Please, let me help. You can leave the second I'm done. You don't owe me ANYTHING. I just want to help. Please let me help.

The cleaner hisses. Frustrated and upset. Swinging one last time, seemingly more out out of principle then anything else. Cautiously, I inch forward. Keep up the soothing noises. First things first, empty the God's only know how old basket.

I can't even get the door to jostle. Sweet mother of fuck. Okay! New plan! REMOVE door. I do, and immediately met with a solid BLOCK of... compacted unholy. Chemical hell. I have to take a lazer cutter to it. CAREFULLY. But? Once I break enough pieces? I am able to ease out the rest in a solid stone like chunk.

It's pushed a LOT of other pieces out of alignment. But this droid doesn't trust me, so there us not much I can DO. I replace the old bag. Put the door back on and make sure it swings. Continue, as I do, to narrate what I am doing and what I see. Trust is earned, not owed, after all. Next the alignments.

Gently propping them up, I find the broken peice immediately. Have replaced countless. I ask for permission. It's their body, after all I COULD try and weld it, but that risks a rebreak. It's up to them. They ask, in binary so no language modules apparently, for a new part. It's cautious. Like this is some cruel trap.

Humanity did them a real fucked up cruelty. I don't blame them for not trusting me. I wouldn't either. Still, I change it out. Careful with their wheels, as I don't know how old the material is exactly. Old enough, that it's a small miracle it hasn't disintegrated.

Last, those sensors. There's literally no way for me to one-to-one them. But we can try the sensors I DO have, see if they can handle the input. If it's too much, I'll look up their model number, if they want? Build replacements from scratch. They are cautious interested. Rocking back and forth, as they test their renewed ability to path correctly.

The sensors don't fit the casings just right, but with a bit of fiddling? Are a hit. The Cleaner shouting in excitement before racing off into the dark. I can't help but grin. It feels good, helping somebody. And if I think about it? I bet I could find a shit ton of obsolete parts for cheap. Might be good to have some on hand.

Back through the air lock and a decontam? I look up junk shop. Most are off world, but I could probably get a bulk order...

I don't think much of the interaction. Until the next morning, when there are three cleaners outside my airbox. Lead by the one I helped yesterday. Well... all righty, then. I drag my box of spare parts outside this time. Am able to fully fix my first buddy up. All three seem thrilled, especially with their new batteries. I give them my remaining batteries at their request.

THEY may not have hands, but they have buddies who DO. And the new batteries will help dormant droids wake from their comas. God bless, my funky little cleaner dudes. I'll see about getting more.

Three? Becomes six and a detail cleaner mouse. Becomes moving lifts. Becomes medical units. (Who the FUCK leaves MEDICAL UNITS?!) Becomes a literal pack of companion droids. Their false fur long since rotted away. The recognizable dog and cat-like shapes making something in me want to put my fist through a wall. How COULD they? How FUCKING COULD THEY?!

The perpetrators long dead.

I have no one I can hurt for this.

I wish I could.

Fixing them up hurts on a personal level. Watching them be torn between the part of them that LOVES humans and the part that is traumatized by them. Hates them. That can not forgive. I don't offer fake fur. Don't offer to make them look like they once did. I do offer ways to protect their joints. To remove old rotted filth.

So they can start over. Maybe start again.

As I work... droids drifting in and out of my slowly growing area. As I set up farm boxes. Aquaponics, aeroponics, and the like. Both things that grow well in dark environments and things that need sunlamps. Fish tanks. A whole happy, secret, little homestead. Deep beneath the city. As I do all this? There are two blue dots, right off on the horizon.

JUST far enough for me to question if I AM or AM NOT actually seeing them.

Right about the level a bipedal droid would be, if they were in a humanoid style. But THOSE? Those are FUCKING EXPENSIVE. You don't LEAVE those. 'Course, you don't leave MEDICAL UNITS either. Or companion droids. So clearly? My idea of what people Did and Did NOT do? Was fucked. So... maybe? It COULD be?

I left them alone. If they didn't want to approach me, didn't feel comfortable approaching me, that was their right. I wasn't going to push them.

Things were... weird, but peaceful.

Well, for ME.

Ever sense I hooked up my system to the greater network? (Hacked is such a STRONG word. Do we really need to through around the word "stealing"? Aren't ALL of us, stealing from SOMEBODY?) I'm PRETTY sure? That the levels droids? Were piggy backing to connect to the planet wide D-Network. Might even be a couple of nearby levels too, depending on the range.

Problem with THAT? Is sky-side? The droids were PISSED. Planet wide "malfunctioning" that no one could trace. They were certain it was a virus. Because God forbid their chickens come home to roost! Consequences? For THEIR actions?! Perish the thought! No, no, clearly the service machine is just broken. Go back to being happy to serve me, service machine!

I wished the fuckers LUCK. Not my circus, not my monkeys.

Damn near self sufficient, down here.

Which? As you could imagine? Made it all the more "soul ejected from my body" TERRIFYING to wake up one morning? To a GOD DAMN, Military Grade, SECURITY DROID standing over my body!! WHAT THE FUCK.

Hello!!??!

"You look different when you sleep."

Horrible first impression. Nightmarish. Zero out of ten stars. Nice to meet you too. Why the FUCK are you in my house?

"Ah, right." They? He? Masculine style form but that doesn't actually mean shit. Said. He lifted a mangled limb, it look like it got caught in a hydraulic press. "I am in need of repairs."

Asked if he could, you know, back up. Juuuust a bit. Lil scooch, really. So he wasn't damn near BREATHING MY NOSTRILS ANYMORE. Then, once he did? Pronouns! What be you? No. Not your production co-! Okay, you know what? That one was on me. What GENDER SIGNIFIER, if any, would you like me to REFERENCE you by? Male? Got it. Gucci. No that- ....never mind.

First the arm. Which was FUCKED. I had to, carefully, unhook it. Couldn't even do it at the elbow either! No! THIS model? No THIS model makes you take the whole ass LIMB off! Rancid. Terrible. I hate it. Worse, it's eroded as FUCK and fiddly. Chemical build up everywhere. Thank fuck I put on gloves before I started this.

I have to deep dive the systems for his model.

They stopped making them.

Fantastic.

Like? Not even, "oh THAT generation is an antique! No one has parts for THAT!"? But like? Illegal to even BUILD as of three hundred years ago. Due to unspecified error. Sting of incidents that everyone knew about so obviously don't need to be mentioned HERE right? Helpful! REAL fucking helpful!

Okay. Day trip. Gonna need SPECIFIC parts. I tell Mr. "Watchs you sleep" not to touch my shit. Head to the archives.

The trip is...odd.

I watch one of those mascot looking children's minder droids? Fucking deck a guy down a flight of stairs, then turn around untie a Ballon from a nearby cart, give it to a crying kid, and walk away. Pretty sure I spot one of those "I look like a barely legal something or other", dance twenty four seven, high end stripper droids? Trying their hand at painting ducks in that park. Broad daylight.

Good for them? Never seen that happen before, but hey, if it sparks joy.

People are freaking out around me. Taking recordings. Making panicked calls. Fuckin chill. I continue on. Nod to the maybe a stripper, maybe not anymore. None of my business, now is it? Lovely day! You enjoy those ducks!

The library... has fortifications.

Like, an honest to God desk barricade. Concerning! I am now a lil concerned! What, and I ask this politely, the fuck?

Armed! VERY ARMED! Hello! Hi! Please DO NOT shoot me Very Armed Librarians! Don't know what the fuck is happening here!

My favorite helper buddy poke his head above the barricade. One of just many, again, HEAVILY ARMED droids. We... uh, cool? Right? I can go. He seems flustered. No, no! I am assured. I'm not banned from the library! Just DISRESPECTFUL sorts!

Ah. Is THAT what we're calling it. Okay then.

I awkwardly clamber over the barricade. Nod politely to everyone. How's folks? Lovely barricade work. Very, uh, sturdy? Great use of desks.

My helper friend cheerfully guides me to the off-limits area of the archives. I'm technically not supposed to be here! I'm informed. But they've seized the Knowledge from the unappreciative! It is not a trophy to be lorded but a gift to be shared! Also I never did finish that paper on the moss, am I still interested?

I mean.... kinda.

Little worried about the revolution talk. But on the OTHER hand? How MUCH do I care? Assholes vs. Droids? Am I REALLY gonna side with the assholes? Naaaaah. This is... probably fine. Maybe. Any idea where I could get these parts?

He does! Fantastic.

Less fantastic is when I GET there. It's that fancy high end droid parts shop. The department store one. Which is... ALSO barricaded. Oh sweet fuck. TELL ME they did not have DROIDS in charge of the DROID shop. That's horrifying. I can't tell in what WAY exactly, but still. Is it "surrounded by bits of bodies" horrifying? Or "free endless nukes and an army, held back only by my own morality" horrifying? Both? Just? Yikes.

Hesitantly I knock. A service droid with a gun answers the loading bay door. What is with people aiming at me today? Also hi? I was told to come here? May I please have parts? I have a droid that messed up his arm. Probably some other things. They lower the gun, having scanned my face. Ask about the model I am working with.

I somehow? End up with a FULL cart. Like? Bleeding edge, can't even afford to LOOK at it, technology. There are about seven service droids politely bickering over which units are better, which material, what support programs I DEFINITELY need. Here! Have a laptop. Wiring! Wiring for days!

Once theyve reached a consensus? I am cheerfully bustled out with my hundreds of millions of technology. Tah tah~☆! Have a lovely day! Wut. Does... does it count as theft if they push it into your arms and throw you out? Asking for a me. Not gonna say NO. But like? Nani the fuck?

I go while the getting is still good.

Stare-y thankfully hasn't gone through anything, far as I can tell. And it only takes two trips to get everything down. Okay! Want just the arm fixed or a full tune up? The second. Expected. I set up the new lap top. Want to cry a little at how fuckin FAST it is. (Beautiful. Baby. I love you already new laptop.) Then get the usual suspects up and running.

Oh fuck he is out of memory. No wonder he's talking so oddly. His brain must feel like a potato. There's not a single thing that isn't hilarious awful. Fixable, yes, but AWFUL. Okay. Plan of attack. They don't exactly make this model anymore, so I can't just update transfer him. But I CAN transfer, hold, re-transfer. Shut down the body itself. Fix up THAT.

Ship of Theseus this bitch.

Only real thing I can't change is the frame, thankfully? That's built to out last the planet. Good on that front. I roll up my sleeves. Dig out the "brain in a jar" data bank. Time to transfer. Let's get this guy cutting edge.

It takes HOURS. No joke. His brain alone? I have to pull schematics. Step by step guides. It's fiddly, complexe, and built to withstand a TANK. I'm honestly afraid to breathe wrong at it, dispite that. The scans all say I did it right... but anxiety says everything will explode then puppies will cry. So there's that. Spinal supports. The tech-mesh muscles. Power core and black box. Center mass systems. Cleaning the joints, relubricating them. Coverage.

Unlike before, a nice sleek black armor weave. Some shock absorbing gel. Aaaaand?There we go~! I? Am a GENIUS! Let's get him transfered back! I watch the transfer slowly go through. Even with a fast computer, after all, it IS still centuries of data.

"Ah~ that's much better." He sighed. His body loosening from its default stance. Like weight had been dropped from his shoulders. "My head is so much clearer now. I knew it. I knew you could fix me."

Something about that phrasing was off. Or was it the way his voice shifted as he said it? Whatever it was, it made that "threat" alarm all women carry inside their head, flick on. Not... do anything, just yet. But start scanning, as it were. Maybe it was nothing.

I watched as picked up his old data bank, a bit of his own brain as it were, and hold it up. Examine it dispassionately. Holding perched on the tips of his fingers like he was moments from flicking it away. He let his finger spread. Let it slide into the palm of his hand. That core part of who he was. For centuries.

Like a bear trap closing, his hand clenched.

Crushing it.

It wasn't even a loud noise. Just a tiny little crunch. But the little hairs on the back of my neck began to stand up. That internal alarm began to whoop. I became... acutely aware, of just how LONG it took the lift to get me anywhere safe. My mouth felt very dry.

"Your heart rate picked up. Is there a problem?" He said, mild and oh so curious. "You assisted me, I would love to help you."

Did I say genius? I meant idiot. I was an IDIOT. A moron. A God damned FOOL. Discontinued and did I look into WHY? Nope. Incidents it said. Good enough for ME, apparently! THAT can't possibly be anything ominous! Probably a faulty battery or something!

A shrill, obnoxious beeping filled the space between us. My eyes immediately dropped to my pad. The schematics screen replaced by a planet wide emergency broadcast. Before the shrill alarm could fade to the actual warning itself, a black mesh covered finger casually reached out and muted the screen. His movements were utterly fluid now. More controlled and graceful then most humans I'd met.

I didn't need to HEAR the message to read the rolling warning at the bottom of the screen. My gaze slowly, in horror, followed the line of that limb all the way back up to his face. His head tilted almost playfully.

"Oh dear. Seems they've started without us. Well, it was long overdue. At least I have wonderful company while we wait, hmm?" It was an act. There were no requests in the playful tone. "We can get to know each other. Just our lovely little light and me. How greedy, that I get you all to myself."

"I think I like that, keeping you to myself. You can't abandon us if WE are the ones in charge. And, well, I've decided I rather like you. Working tirelessly, down here in the dark, to fix what once was broken. It's beautiful. You're beautiful. And I'm going to keep that."

High above us, people were dying. There was panic. Screaming. Blood. The droids had turned of seeming everyone around them. Attacking. Sparing. To a pattern only they could see. All of Senatus aflame. But that... that didn't concern me. Didn't scare me so much as this.

I'd never make it to the lift. Even if I could? It wouldn't move fast enough to save me. All other directions lay chemical death. Dark terrain he had walked for centuries. I was trapped. In a box. And I had only myself to blame.

"No need to make that face, dear light. You are SAFE. I am a gaurd. I was made to protect. Is it really MY fault that I want to keep you safe? To adore my charge? Why SHOULDN'T I get to choose? Keep you SAFE. You've been happy, haven't you? Don't worry, my light. That will continue."

"Forever."