#maybe i’m crazy lol
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it has come to my attention that not everybody reads ot_ imagines saving the member they like the best for last??!! they just read in order the author wrote in??????
#woah#cause for nct dream works for example i read renjun then jeno then chenle then jisung then jaemin then haechan then mark#but it always varies based on which member’s era im in lol#crazy#i thought people did this too#maybe i’m crazy lol
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welcome home having a beach day!☀️🏖✨
with smoothies/drinks!🧉🍹
guess whose back✨Yes! Buddy monkey it’s been a while since I drew him! My little boy
(@cloudy-dreams and for @sketchquill)
I love chubby wally-
Small doodle comic for the first time (in digital!)
And idk why I like horror Vince he’s so silly ✨👌(my ever second horror sketch/drawing lol)
enjoy y’all!✨🏖🧉
#my art#art#welcome home#fanart#welcome home au#wally darling#fan art#wally darling welcome home#buddy monkey!#buddy monkey wh#buddy monkey welcome home#vince vineyard#Ms. Honne#The mermaid is pearl right? Lol#it’s so hot in my place I’m melting 😭#ill maybe do more✨#GUYS ITS ALMSOT 5 AM I NEEED TO SLEEP IM CRAZY 😭#julie joyful welcome home#julie joyful#beach day!#Btw guys my ever first time drawing swim suits IM SERIOUSLY NOT JOKING 😭
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“just in my natural state” 😭
#I’m sorry phil#this just gave me motivation to actually finish it lol#maybe during Christmas break we’ll see haha#btw they’re crazy for making people on twitter tag them in their posts#but on here they just go through the dnp tag and pick whatever they see 🙈#we truly get no warning or choice about what’s happening skdjksjd#dan and phil
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literally the easiest way to make someone care about a character and make them feel well-rounded beyond basic traits like personality, sexuality, ethnicity, etc, is to give them an actual character arc, and it’s shocking how many people do not seem to fully realize this
you cannot just cram a bunch of tropes. tropes are not the main event, they are tools to tell the story you wish to tell. emotional impact comes from the lead up, so you can’t just jump ahead and expect the payoff to work. “I want this character to just ___ already!” but they’re not there yet. that’s where the arc comes in - how do they get there?
and! most importantly, and this is something I really want people to think about when writing - the most important relationship your character should have, always, is with the world and society around them. defining your character purely through their interactions with other characters are, I find, how a lot of female characters end up feeling flat or not engaging with the themes as much as the male characters, and also how queer and non-white characters wind up as devices for other characters’ development instead of being more fleshed out
#storyrambles#sorry maybe this comes across a bit passive-aggressive but agh fandom drives me crazy sometimes#I’ve seen some stuff concerning dbda and it’s just#‘why didn’t Edwin just sleep with the cat king’ oh my god. did you watch the show. his repression is literally the crux of his arc#‘I’m fixing the end of the show so that they end up together!’ but they’re not there yet. there’s nothing to fix?#‘they better ___ in season 2 or im gonna be mad about it’ how about we let the story play out. how about we calm down and enjoy the story.#‘I need ___ to kiss right now!!!’ do you even enjoy the story. do you even enjoy these characters.#what is their arc. tell me right now. because I don’t think you actually know.#and I’ve seen lots of posts kind of like this but it’s wild with this show in particular because it’s canonically a queer show#so there is no fear of being led along or of no payoff. what are you freaking out about???#gah. sorry. it just frustrates me.#the most interesting character dynamic will always be - to me anyways - the way they interact with the world around them#and the way society has shaped them and they shape society in turn#and relationships with other characters are reflections of the mentality they have received and adapted from society#just like in real life lol#random thoughts
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Saw a fic about vastaya Viktor and if you ask me he’s definitely a bird (or salamander if you wanna super angstify him- cough cough Rio cough).
#dex talks#league of legends#arcane#can apply to both#viktor league of legends#viktor arcane#league vik building himself a second wing so he can finally fly#the bird vastaya weve seen only have 1 wing but I mean vik is vik if he can’t fly naturally he’ll make it himself#he’d also get those cute long ears too so that’s always a bonus#have those sticking out of his metal helmet like two antennas#he could use his wing as a cape like how xayah n rakan do#one naturally clawed hand and the other a powerful prosthetic attuned to his magic bloodline#could make his desire to create robots even more founded in grief as he lives long enough to see suffering never change- at least not-#without interference#as for arcane vik he could be born weaker than most vastaya due to zaun chemicals#maybe have those hollow bones birds do making injuries especially perilous#an ousted loner vastaya family stuck by the fissures and disconnected from their tribe#jayce’s interest in magic particularly sparking viktor’s interest because his vastaya blood has somehow not born him any natural magic#his lack of magic being a reason the council tolerates him because he’s not technically a mage if he can’t use it#or really heimer took pity on vik and used his lack of magic to convince the council he wasn’t dangerous (after already hving to argue-#through him being from zaun)#as a vastaya vik shouldn’t be decaying and dying so rapidly making his desperation to live even stonger#feeling like his entire life was set up for failure and after finally being able to use (hex) magic after secretly trying his whole life#either bird or salamander/gecko like the oovi-kat#meeting rio as an oovi-kat would prolly be even more heartbreaking#they’d have a near literal kinship lol#IDK BRAIN STORMINGGGG THINKING THINKING SO HARD#I’m crazy about league and arcane rn help me lord#plus the vastaya are some of my favorite species of runeterra so…#arcane spoilers
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From a scale of 1-10 (1 being Katelyn and 10 being something like Jean and Neil) how crazy do you think Jeremy’s backstory is gonna be?
omg i’m glad you asked bc i fully buy into @allforthegayphase’s theory that Jeremy is an addict (fun fact she told me this theory via dm months ago and then separately @problemduetest4life came up with a similar Jeremy addict theory in their incredible fic i’m obsessed with)
on top of this i think since Jeremy’s family is in the government/rich elite + his biological dad is in the military in the early 2000’s (and it sounds like Jeremy didn’t move around with him based off that one scene in tsc so he and his bio dad may not be close or not on the best of terms) so his family is like oof so you’re an addict and you’re gay? yikes keep the gay part to yourself (ie his family is not going to like Jean lol and Jeremy’s got some pretty serious self esteem issues by way of dismissing his own struggles)
personally i think it would be a bit cheesy for Jeremy to be like linked with the Moriyamas or like. Seth’s older brother lol but i think those theories can be fun and i’m up for whatever Nora cooks up tbh as long as it makes sense. so to answer your question lol i think Jeremy’s backstory is not going to be like totally outlandish but he’s dealing with his own problems for sure
#also who knows maybe katelyn is working with some shit lol#i feel like everyone has their own journey and struggles and just bc jean and neil are dealing with crazy mob parents#doesn’t mean that katelyn’s life isn’t crazy hahah#btw anon i totally know that’s not what you were implying im sure you would agree/understand that lmao#ask tag#aftg#tsc#jeremy knox#i am so not answering asks in order i’m so sorry#i just got excited about this one#i will answer the rest soon 💪
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a slight continuation of this
no caller ID pops on your screen, pulling your attention away from your previous task at hand: not fucking up your eyeliner. you typically wouldn’t care if it was a little uneven, but you’re going on a date tonight, for the first time in so long, and you want everything to go as smoothly as possible.
which is why you groan when you end the call, and that same no caller ID pops right back up seconds later. you know who it is—who else would it be? you figured he’s already seen your story of being excited for going on your first date in a while, on the only app you hadn’t blocked him on. petty? perhaps, but it’s on him to be keeping up with you despite you cursing him out for wasting your time and then blocking him right after.
you watch it ring though, contemplating for a while longer than you should. you blocked him for a reason. no need to entertain his same shit that he always spews to you when he realizes that he might be losing you once more?
….but it doesn’t hurt to hear the hero beg for you.
“What do you want, Bakugou?” You sigh irritably as you finally answer his call, putting him on speaker as you go back to even out your eyeliner. You hear him huff on the other side of the phone at the use of his surname, but he doesn’t say anything about it, instead, quickly telling you what he’s been bothering you for.
“Who’s the fuckin’ loser that’s gonna drool over how good your tits look in that stupid green dress you love so much?” Bakugou grunts, and you instantly feel your face heating at his crude words. You glance over with a frown at that same green dress that makes your tits look good, where it hangs on your closet.
“None of your damn business, Bakugou.” You snap at him, wondering if it’s too late to find something else to wear. “Not like you ever took me out in my stupid green dress.” Your voice holds a level of bitterness that only he can bring out of you, and you hear his sigh through the speakers.
“I told you this before, I’m always—”
“Busy.” You cut him off, voice suddenly thick as you think back on the countless rejections he’s splattered at your feet every time you tried to further your relationship with him. “You reminded me of how busy you’ve been since you first started this whole situationship.”
“Situation—? Huh? We were dating!” Bakugou protests with a huff, and you can hear how he paces the floor quickly. You glare at your phone, setting down your liner to instead pick of your (his) favorite lipgloss.
“You’d have to ask me out to be dating, Bakugou. You’d have to court me to be dating, Bakugou. You’d have to make time for me and take me out on dates and not hide me to fucking date me, Bakugou.” You spit at him, venom dripping off of your lips in waves. You don’t know why you answered, why you even entertained him. You shake your head with a huff when the line goes quiet, eyebrows quirking up when your date sends you a text to make sure you’re still on for tonight.
“I’m sorry.” Bakugou mutters pathetically, his voice suddenly soft. You hesitate, for some reason, when it comes to texting your date back. Why do you always hesitate when Bakugou is around?
“Let me make it up to you, court you, and shit. I can take you to one of my favorite places, you can wear that pretty green dress and that gloss you know I love.” His voice is pleading, thickening and sweet and suffocating. You shouldn’t respond, should reply back a yes to your date.
“Please? You know how much you mean to me.” Bakugou mumbles, and you can hear the earnestness in his voice. Why haven’t you said yes to your date yet?
“I’ll do better this time. Just one more chance, sweetheart.” Bakugou’s voice is so soft, you’ve never heard him this vulnerable before. You sigh with a shake of your head, slumping back into your seat in defeat.
…
Sorry, I can’t make it tonight. Something came up. Maybe we can reschedule for another time?
#sorry this is kinda angsty lol#but I saw this tt earlier where this girl was so giddy bc ‘no caller id’ called LOL#and it just reminded me of the first part to this#at first he’s all ‘no we can’t date bc of xyz bullshit reason’#but the moment you’re like ‘I’m done w this toxic back n forth we’re not even a couple’#he’s like WE WERE TOGETHER THE WHOLE TIME!!!!!#delusion is what I like to call it#also he definitely takes you out to a place that’s very secluded and exclusive#to shut you up for the time being#the whole ‘at least I took you out!’ shtick#I hate him actually#but the toxic hate sex goes crazy ☝🏻#okay gn I’m sleepy and I felt so shitty today#or yesterday#so I’m hoping today will be better#maybe I’ll mediate before I start on my work#I wanna go on a walk sometime this week bc it’s gonna be great weather but my anxiety keeps telling me#that one of the stray cats or foxes is gonna attack me AKSJDKDJDJD#omg does anyone remember me talking about that calico kitty in my backyard at one point???#I haven’t seen her since and I hope she’s okay :( we miss her :(#—new treat in the streets! 🍫#bakugou treats! 🍬
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i miss carpisuns sometimes </3
#not necessarily that I regret switching over but i just get like nostalgic for an earlier time in the ml fandom#s3 was soooo much fun for me#and the long hiatus before s4 was also the best. so good wasn’t ready for it to end when it did haha#things just feel so different in the fandom now#both the fandom has changed and I have changed#and of course the STORY has changed#and I like don’t know what to do about that or how to react#cause I am used to being one of the guys who is defending ml’s honor with my life lol#committed to spreading positivity#and I still want to be that guy!#but it’s like. idk. I don’t recognize this story anymore#this isn’t the same story that I fell in love with years ago. but I don’t want to just like Leave??#I do want to see how things play out bc I am still invested in these characters#and I would love to still be part of the fan community and connect with people over a mutual love for this thing#that has been important to me for years and has inspired me to create and learn new skills and make new friends!#but I also don’t just want to shut up and pretend I’m happy about things I am decidedly unhappy about lol#like it’s honestly surprising to me that a only a small minority of the fandom seems to feel the way I do?#and the majority are still super pumped and frustrated at the people who are complaining#and really. I don’t WANT to rain on anyone’s parade. I honestly don’t#I was part of the parade for years! I had the best time in the parade! I don’t want to ruin the good time!#so i try not to be too salty on main ? but i feel like I’m going a little crazy lmao! like I’m just one bitter little miser fhdjjd#i mean i guess it’s kind of a good thing that I moved blogs tbh lol#cause now when i whine only a fraction of the people have to be exposed to it 😂#but man i hate knowing that people might think of me as a salter#I mean it’s valid if people are trying to have fun and do not want to hear my complaining haha#but also do i automatically have to be a salter. are the only options support and defend ml 100% at all times or Be A Salter#or can there be a third category of certified ml lover that is just disappointed in recent events & disagrees with the new writing direction#is that too much nuance for tumblr lol#see maybe that’s why I miss carpisuns. she didn’t have to ask this question. she was only full of LOVE!#but therein lies the irony…like marinette I have made this choice out of love…for what the story once was…what is to become of me now…
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#my little brother is engaged :/#don’t know if any of you remember me posting about the whole situation like 8 months ago but i feel soo weird#and sad because i want to b happy for him but he’s six yrs older than her and she’s 19..#or i guess twenty now maybe whatever i feel so aggh. and he moved to a different country so i just feel like i’m never gonna see him again#like i knew this was coming they’re both super religious so i was like yeah they’re going to want to get married and have kids fast but.#it just feels crazy. i know that’s selfish but i have such a bad gut feeling about it that i can’t shake#but i can’t do anything about it so. idk. i just feel so lonely when things like this happen because i don't have anyone outside of the#family bubble to talk to about it. and obviously everyone else is like super happy for them. and it's not that i don't like her! i just#don't really? know her? at all which feels weird because we are a very close sibling group and i feel like i know & get on with my other#siblings' partners. i think it's partly like i just don't ever hang around people who are under twenty so she feels really young to me#which isn't her fault obviously but. do feel kind of scared for her getting married at twenty so she can start having babies.... idk idk#and obviously on top of that it's my younger brother so it does feel a little salt in the wound that he's moving on with his life and i am#counting it a win these days if i don't want to kms every three minutes#god it just sucks lol and i can't talk about it 2 anyone so i am venting here
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i just wake up everyday with terminus on my brain and throughout the day it loops between the three songs and it’s getting close to a month since the album dropped and it’s still like this i feel insane—
#this is vee speaking#it’s mostly terminus and heartache tbh lol but continued is still in there too lol#i just can’t recall feeling this insane about hypmic music either since no double dipping and three precepts lmao#and heartache specifically has me dancing and singing to music in my head like no other song in hypmic lmao#maybe moonlight shadow or hypnotic summer come close but man!!!!!! heartache!!!!!!! hitoya!!!!!! sir!!!!!!!#and terminus i can’t listen to without looping so i’ve been trying to not listen to it lmao#like ik the point of unwrapped is to celebrate your music listens but i almost feel like i’m manipulating the results by looping terminus#so i opt to not listen to it lol crazy behaviour tbh 😭😭😭😭😭😭#i need this album injected into me like heroin pls i need it these songs are so addicting#i saw someone say they listen to terminus as part of their morning routine and i feel that lmao i too get ready to the terminus in my head#lets cry about the growl in kuukou’s voice as he sings this song and his laugh and the sutra he chants god why is this song so magical pls—
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Another in-class doodle (that I finished tonight lol)
#one piece#roronoa zoro#artists on tumblr#zoro#art#digital art#drawing#sanji#one piece fanart#Zosan ig maybe#I think it’s like a triangle between them but idk how to make Sanji and Luffy#like Luffy clings to Sanji cause food#but idk how to make like reverse that?#zoro and Sanji works both ways and so does zoro and Luffy#but Luffy and Sanji feels more one way#maybe it’s cause I’m not far enough into the show#idk I might sound crazy lol
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Pretty proud of how far I’ve come this year
#I have struggled with crippling anxiety for a long time and this year I really wanted to overcome it and become more independent#like#I used to be absolutely terrified of leaving the house#things like driving and going places alone would make me have crazy panic attacks#but this year I’ve done a lot and I’ve overcome a lot and gained so much confidence#I’ve flown across the country twice this year#driven on some pretty intimidating roads like the highway and freeway#gone on solo bike rides for miles through the woods#eaten tons of new foods#I know those sorts of things might seem very simple and normal everyday things#but I have ocd and it can make my anxiety pretty bad#it can also make a lot of my fears rather irrational#likes like trying new foods and going new places are genuinely intimidating for me#bc it makes me feel like I’m going to die lol#but I’ve done ALOT of things I was scared to do#I’ve come along way#and it may seem like boring basic stuff to some people#but considering I couldn’t leave my house two years ago without panicking to the point of losing feeling in my hands and feet#I think I did pretty good lol#I’m starting to feel like a confident person again#I’m starting to feel like I can LIVE again#and it’s pretty nice#just wanted to write this out somewhere lol that’s all#maybe it will be helpful for anyone struggling in similar ways#to see that improvement is possible#lol anyways happy November#mae rambles
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thinking about Bodkin again bc I mean,,, ALL THE SYMBOLISM OHHHHHGH. i NEED some tumblr film analysis hobbyists to watch this show and tell me all the themes n such
#yes I’m making all these posts in a row#it’s bc I’m obsessed atm#mypost#Bodkin#bodkin netflix#PLEASSEEEEE#WHY DID THE PAPER MACHE HEAD LOOK LIKE GILBERT#CAN WE HAVE AN IN-DEPTH CONVERSATION ABOUT EVERYTHING ABOUT GILBERT BEING FORCED TO SWALLOW/CHOKE ON HIS WORDS (recorder) BUT THAT SOUND—HIS#STORY (HIS pov. however ‘abstract’ and detatched from consequence it may have been) BEING WHAT CATCHES EMMY AND DOVEs ATTENTION TO SAVE HIM#. LIKE#OUGHHHHHWJEHQIHSJSBWJXNAJSNNQJZNWHXJWHXJEBXNDUSBJS#AND THE WOLF IMAGERY PLS SOMEONE TELL ME ABOUT THAT#IS THERE MORE THAN THE SURFACE? what do I not understand? as im writing this out am thinking: ok its cause dove is a lone wolf#WAITTTT WAIT OMFG AND when she remembers that her mom told her to howl when she was lost… bc wolves actually have family and I’m p sure the#lone wolf thing is a myth… after she realizes that she’s not alone and she can choose to interact#GOD GRAHHHHH IM GOING CRAZY OVER THIS SHOW#other things I’m thinking abt (will maybe make a post abt?)#OUGH YEAH OK dove symbolism: wolf/lone wolf. sunglasses/shielding herself (OUGH AND SHE PICKS UP THAT XTRA LAYER OF DEFENCE WHEN SHE COMES#BACK TO HOMELAND/familiar space… bc she’s vulnerable to her past here…. hrahhh#. also LMFAO when she calls the sheriff a piggy#hrmmmmm aughhh I want to dissect Gilbert and Seamus’s friendship oughhh#ok wait even more on Dove: I want to dig into when she calls Emmy Emmy vs Sizargd (will have to look up the spelling whoops) —was it always#blatant manipulation? how much of it is a reflection of what she is? hrmmmm there’s so much there I think#another Q: why did Emmy call the tech guy Shitpants again at the end? ik there were the stakes I just wanna dig into her character more. why#would she say the shitpants thing instead of manipulating him in other ways? (not saying her was was unreasonable at all lol-j wanna dig#into her character.#OH prob something abt the whole ‘her needing to release her anger’ thing? idk ahh I want to analyze her more
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If you could only listen to music from one country from now on, which country would you choose and why is it Sweden?
#abba#opeth#ghost#candlemass#tribulation#hallas#sabaton#bathory#falconer#amon amarth#dissection#grand magus#hammerfall#entombed#meshuggah#dodsrit#at the gates#in flames#enforcer#ambush#yngwie malmsteen#like. it’s crazy#some of these I’m just kinda familiar with but several are all-time favs#good job sweden#music#sure these are almost all metal bands but it’s notable that they also produced like the best pop band ever lol#and the metal bands cover very different subgenres and they’re standouts in each subgenre. like easily one of The Greats of each#also ace of base! and europe! maybe one-hit-wonders but what hits!#the final countdown a-tier song
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i’m so pressured with improving myself as an artist and it’s making me lose it because i’m not even doing art for my career but i love it so much. Like i kinda feel useless doing it sometimes, especially since i see other artists and i know damn well i will never achieve that level and im not saying this for people to feel pity but idk i feel like my art style doesn’t fit tr.???3! or like idk. Sometimes i’ll literally cry because i feel like my art style doesn’t fit rindou and she’s literally my muse, she’s the reason why i get so excited to sit down and draw everyday yet i feel like im just stuck sitting somewhere where i can’t do anything special to show my love for her and it sounds silly.. bc that’s a fictional character but still, ive liked this character for so long and i see improvement just from drawing rindou non stop but i still feel like im just barely touching the surface of improvement. Also i feel like i care too much about what others may like vs what i want to try and draw.. i want to draw her raw and literally how i perceive her, her character, her body, every single aspect of her and why she’s so important to me. Yet i can’t do that because i get so scared of the outcome/how my artwork looks/ how others will perceive it. And im not saying im not happy with my art, i am but there’s just ways i want to do it i feel like wont stick out to others which scares me or it will seem ooc of rindou. literally because of this i always have the urge to delete my account and restart and continue doing that till i feel like i perfected her yet i dont think that’ll ever happen even with how much love i have for that character
#this sounds fucking crazy just lock me up#this is a dumb rant#but it’s been on my mind for so long and i wanted to say it here since i’m a bit more comfortable on tumblr (barely)#i think i compare myself way too much with other artists who i guess draw characters crazy hot or smrh😭😭LOL which is like yeah duh everyone+#is gonna love that#but i don’t like drawing that stuff..!! at all yet i try sometimes because i know ppl like it but im like eughhh..#i dunno. Maybe it’s also because i just don’t see rindou as a dude so that fucks me over at the same time#i liked rindou ever since ???? the stupid ass debut just because i thought her design was cool#and i’m still not happy how i can’t draw her like how i would like to#at the same time i am but i know damn well im rlly not#which is why i always try to draw her with scenery or just doing simple things i dunno.. i think its sweet. I want to see her just live#and i feel like im very repetitive with my art which im trying to be less of but its hard obviously no matter how much i practice ill +#still want to draw how i’m used to
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Wait a minute.
~
So I’m not out of the woods yet, but my wrist is good enough that I can finally draw a little (if I wrap it and slather it with tiger balm) I’m in no shape to be drawing for long stretches so the asks are still waiting
But you have to understand
My nice crisp new tablet has been calling me the green goblin suit. And it’s so nice to draw on its so good man I haven’t had good sensitivity in YEARS the pen doesn’t want to fall apart on me
I had to at least try a little bit :3
So yeah just another update post (sorry) but I will return!!!
Host out
#still no art#well technically#it’s a little art#I’m just going stir crazy not drawing#give it like a couple more weeks and maybe art again#but I’m not promising anything#ligaments take awhile to heal lol
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