#maybe gonna do that soon but not yet
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'I wont cry for you, I wont crucify the things you do. I wont cry for you, see, when you're gone, I'll still be BLOODY MARY'
#cw blood#SUUUPER SCUFFED LIL WIP THATS BEEN RRRROTTING IN MY FOLDER. OUT!! GET OUT!!!#its almos 2 am and imm gettin high as hrothgar. spruced this up within an hour so i could be shared n eaten#its SUPPOsed to be part ofa bigger doodly page so ofc theres the chance this changes between now n then#fuuuuck shoulda made her dress sparkly. fuckit ill fix it laterrrrr. i havnt posted art in YWEARRS i needed to post something#also i uh. well you see i started losing followers on twitter bc im sooo inactive and i KNOW that shouldnt matter like it should be whateve#but. you see. i lkike when number go up and when it go down i get MMMADDD.we all get our dopamine from somewhere#ANYWAY so i actually havnt touched the suckening in so long. been workin on oc stuff.BUT WELL. ARTHUR AND MARY. STILL MAKE ME WEEP#THEYRE SO CUTE N TRAGIC...whadda fuck is it with grizzly n charlie characters being so in love and so doomed#kian and becky then arthur and his various exes like CMAHn.stop doing this to me#from what i remember of the episode.she seemed so.tired.disconnected.like she had been wandering a dream#and yet she seemed so positive.reasonably concerned and yet.content.she warmed up to arthur as soon as she recognized him#she speaks so gently and so sweetly and she keeps the conversation so light.even though shes dead and shes gone and she#is doomed to wander an odd limbo for the rest of time.and yet she seemed so at peace.i can see why arthur liked her.what happened?#what caused them to separate?arthur seems so jaded and so tired.marys company seems like such a gentle place to rest.#how did he squander such a blessing?was it a blessing?OHH what i would give to crack open their minds and peer inside.#yknow wat im runnign out of room i think so ill add a last thought here at the bottom of my tags. I AM MORE CORRECT ABT ARHTURS UGLY LOOK#I WANT THAT MAN TO BE BEASTLY AND GROSS AND STRANGE AND SCARY AND EEWWW I SEE THINGS SQUIRMING IN THE DARK.ther are bugs#LETTING HIM HAVE HOT HOT ABBS AND STUFF WAS A COP OUUTTTT LET HIS WHOLE FORM BE DISTORTED OR UR NOT A FUCKING 0 APPEARANCE BITCH#THE BONES SHIFTED BENEATH AS IF TRYING TO HATCH. MANY OTHER THINGS HATCHED ASWELL. THE DEAD IMMORTAL FLESH SOURED#TOO GRAND TO ROT BUT TOO CORRUPTED TO KEEP CLASSIC FORM. MMMONSTER MONSTER MONSTER MONSTER#oka y im not going to bed but im gonna go. uh. do miore drugs or something. maybe ill work on more jrwi stuff. or oc stuff.#i hope ur day goes swimmingly thankyou for reading my tags i love you so so so so so much
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i know about the dating aspect but very little about the actual plot of the actor au show
what's it about?
ah see, the reason you don't know about the shows plot is bc,, ,, , neither do i
no, but honestly the original idea was for it to be a drama that centers around batman and the robins with the starting point either being when damian has already shown up, or perhaps right when tim is about to take the mantle so there can be the drama of damian showing up and making it a seasonal arc for him to integrate
the thought process in skipping over dick and jasons times as robin was simply logistics, i want a decent cast already there and established, but not too big of a cast so it can expand into later seasons
i also wanted the show to be a pick and choose of canon events, kind of a patchwork of things in various canons that i like or just find interesting, so the plots would be similar to certain comics but not necessarily the same (i haven't worked out any real timeline past a few notable events)
and that's about the only thing i rly thought of the show itself bc my brain was a little more focused on the actors rather than the characters. but since you've asked this i can't get it out of my head, toying with various ideas based on major dramas from our world
is it an insane run that lasts way after it should have died and has genuine cultural effects like supernatural? since i skipped over so much backstory does that get included as flashbacks a la the Lost format or more interspersed flashbacks? hell, do they release tie in novels or comics for the fans who latch onto dick or jason and want real stories from when they were robin beyond the necessary flashbacks for storytelling purposes?
i think ive officially decided the show starts out with tims origin, so damian wouldn't show up until season 2 or 3 (logistically it makes more sense to wait until s3 but it makes me sad to have him missing for 2 seasons lmao, so ill circle back to that)
this way we have a decent sized starting cast but not so large that we'd have to kick people off screen to make space for the characters that come later. this means ill actually make jasons debut as red hood is the main plot point for the first season, there's no pit madness here, and things definitely won't play out the exact same as the comics (though you wont catch me changing much about utrh here, just adjustments to make it more of a tv show thing) i will elaborate about this arc Very Soon cause im giving myself all sorts of ideas right now
and this got a little away from me lmao, ill be posting more details hopefully some time this weekend now that ive been giving it more thought 😂 (no actual writing yet tho as i have to wait for my temp computer to get that done, just more of my rambling like this 😅 and maybe some bullet point lists lmao)
#i still dont have a name for this au just yet#if you havent voted in my poll about it pls go do that!!!#ill love you forever!!!#thinking about it now#starting off with the red hood arc makes me happy about the jaytim aspect tho#i think its a fun choice#i think there will be a slight time jump near the beginning of season 1#so that jason doesnt come back like IMMEDIATELY after tim takes up the mantle but so we still get to see tims origin#or maybe the origin will be told in flashbacks along with some of jasons history for the parallels of his return#mmmmmm#we'll see#ill have real answers for you soon lmao#i just like how intertwined tims story is with jasons and im gonna play around with that for the show too#it makes the jaytim part so much better too#melodys words#melody answers#deepwithintheabyss#arc au
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does anyone still think about this because i do
#this one is from months ago but#i was too shy to post this lololol#I HAVE SO MUCH SHIT I HAVE YET TO POST im gonna do that soon. maybe#also one of the first times i try to blend more shit with the colors#rendering???? idk wtf the definition of rendering is.#anyways#one of my favorite flavors of kenny#inspired by uhh that one fanart of juggalo kenny by vpzt0 on twt#:3c#south park#south park fanart#juggalo#juggalo kenny#icp#kenny mccormick#sp fanart#sp kenny#sp kenny mccormick#sp kenny fanart#milo art:3
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again and again i find myself lamenting that audio roleplay isn't taken more seriously by some people. like yeah, they often have a romantic element, and by nature they usually directly involve/address the listener- and i totally get that those things aren't to everyone's taste. no art or entertainment is universally appealing, and that's okay! but.. it still makes me a lil sad that the "cringe" reputation of asmr/audio rp precedes it. there's a whole lot of talent and creativity being poured into these audios by so many people that i feel goes unrecognized and/or disrespected simply due to the medium that the stories are being told through.
#this post brought to you by: me bingeing Sam & Darlin's entire storyline over the past few days and having a Lot of feelings abt it#asmr#audio roleplay#rp audio stuff#redacted audio#anyways i don't have a conclusion to this post. and i'm not Mad or Upset or anything i'm just thinkin' out loud#and i mean it's not like it doesn't get plenty of praise within its respective audience bc it does. at least for the more popular creators#but i feel it'll still always have the shadow of its cringe reputation looming over it#which makes it hard for some ppl to openly appreciate or share with others that aren't already fans of the medium#like do u know how many comments i've seen along the lines of 'this is great but i'd die if anyone knew i liked this kinda stuff' ?? :(#idk maybe i feel strongly about it bc i'm a self-insert fanfic writer. and i feel like the two have a lot in common. including a bad rep.#like. not every audio will be well-written or produced and neither will every fanfic. but that doesn't mean it's a less legitimate artform#and i'm lucky to have never (yet) received negative comments on my work. but that doesn't mean that it doesn't make me sigh when people-#-say shit like 'this reads like fanfiction' as a way of calling something bad. or other similar sentiments that make the same implication#and i wouldn't be surprised if audio creators feel the same way when they encounter certain comments or statements#like. those YT videos where ppl will 'try bf asmr for the first time' or whatever and it's just 20 mins of cringing and over-reacting? eugh#tbf i haven't watched many bc why do that to myself. so Maybe there's some that are respectful but still. imagine getting roasted like that#and yes yes i know that by posting stuff online you're inadvertently sighing up to be criticized by Anyone but still. man. i dunno#i'm going on a tangent but my point is. i'm grateful for the creators that still make their art in spite of the public's perception of it#bc some of the most impactful emotional experiences i've ever gained from fiction took place in audio rp and i'm so serious abt that.#anyways. this post almost feels like i'm 'making up a person to be mad at' but i promise it's not that serious i'm just yapping. mostly.#certainly not trying to start any kind of debate or anything either i just have a lot of fixation-induced energy and nowhere to put it#this is Eric's fault (/lh) for cooking Sam up in a lab catered exactly to my taste and making Darlin' waaaaay too painfully relatable#but it's also My fault for bingeing the Inversion /and/ the Quinn arc /and/ the Summit all within a couple days. but i can't help myself#feels like i've run an emotional marathon. triathlon. The Emotional Olympics if u will. i'm feeling Everything#who knew that beating the shit out of ur fictional abuser could feel so goddamn cathartic! it's a nice replacement when u can't do it irl#anyways i'm off on a tangent again. thanks for coming to my TED Talk i'm gonna crawl back in my hole now#actually i'm gonna go relisten to a few audios. as Research for my Sam & Darlin' playlist as well as a post i'll be making about it soon#u Know i've got it bad when i not only make a playlist but start Posting on here about the songs that remind me of them. i'm cooked guys.
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Spider-teens!!! They are here!!!
Link has webshooters both in his feet and his hands. He has a lightning design and i think he goes just by spiderman cause he is a simple man. Its probablly black and yellow.
Normal has a teeny based design, (he has a T shaped marking on his suit) gloves and his iconic chunky shoes, he also wears a giant jacket a lot. I imagine it to be teal and yellow.
Scary used to go by spidergirl (which still haunts her and shes really anoyed to get called it) but now goes by purple widow/girlspider (i havent decided on the name yet), she has a web undercut in her normal clothes. (Its spider gwen and spider punk inspired).
Taylor goes by dragon spider (cause he is my little cringe boy who thinks its the coolest thing also im pretty sure its a fairytail thing idk i googled it but never watched fairytail). He still has his cane sword (its a mobility aid and i stand by that!) He also has a two part mask (bandana and the normal mask part) and dyed hair. He moves around with more jo-jo like webshooters.
#dndads#dungeon and daddies#taylor swift dndads#normal oak#link li wilson#scary marlow#scary marlowe#my art#spiderman dndads au#spiderverse dndads au#will i do more content for it? maybe probablly#but im on a trip now so i can't#also probablly gonna open commmisions soon idk yet tho#cause im finally gonna have time to figure it out in the summer
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#cw vent#maybe i stayed up too late but suddenly i feel like crying#like really badly#i tried very hard today#but im still so scared#of everything#im being watched. i am absolutely sure im being watched#i can feel somebodys presence over my shoulder now and they can probably read what im typing#its been like this for so long#and#as im typing this it has been the sixteenth of juky for about two hours#twenty two hours left until my birthday#i will be sixteen#that is scaring me so much#i haven't progressed since i was maybe eleven#i still can't take care of mysekf. i shouldn't ve admitting to this but i genuinely can't do basic actions#i constantly forget to keep my body in a safe state. my hair is so messy. i get tok focused on other stuff and most of the time i just#forget to shower#i am genuinely so disgusting and unhygienic. i know this and want to fix it#but also.. i just wish i was like just an internet person#if i didn't have to eat or maintain my body i think id be a much happier person#im scared#how can i possibly be turning 16. i haven't even learnt how to eat food yet#most meals i can't eat without gagging or feeling like vomiting#i don't know why im typing all this out#for a while i was okay with it being my birthday soon. because i thought i would finally get attention and love from others#but im starting to realise that probably will not be happening#:[#why am i typing this out. my head hurts#and im gonna die
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is this the year I finally come out to my homophobic parents??? what if I did it on my 2 year hrt anniversary to celebrate???
#harmy.txt#might actually do it#I'm so tired of living an almost double life...#only reason I have not done it yet is I don't wanna make my younger siblings' lives more difficult#but maybe it's Time i care about myself for once#as soon as i get my parents off my bank account I'm gonna drop the bombshell
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art of fem vampire Argenti from the vampire x vampire hunter yuri argenthill au by borgerchorger and k0uk0_ on twt
#tunasal art#my art#fem argenti#argenti#argenti honkai star rail#im gonna be real 1.im convinced i blacked out and got possessed or something while drawing this because i have no idea how i did any of that#like wow im rlly proud of this piece but how did i go from not being able to finish a single wip in 4 months#to finishing this in the span of 4hrs at like 2am#2. while doing the sketch I had to breaks because I was grinning like an idiot at how the sketch was turning out and how pretty it looked#like physically had to get up and do a lap around my bedroom to get the energy out#power of yuri i guess#hopefully I can draw a boothill piece to accompany this one soon#im trying to get used to drawing fem boothill still… and I can’t quite get ideas for what I wanna do#we’ll see.. maybe after that I can try drawing some argenthill stuff too#ugh but knowing my brain I shouldn’t make too many plans yet one thing at a time#aa saved post draft on wrong blog gonna have to reblog onto main I can’t be arsed to retype all this😭
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I want you to know that I very much enjoy seeing you around. I miss you when you're off doing school and work stuff, sure, but I always look forward to seeing you pop up again. Always catches me by surprise, too XD
Also I remembered your old vampire!au writings from when you were writing anon. I miss the times when you wrote stories like that, but I know you're busy nowadays. I will go back and reread them at some point ;)
HFHFGF NOOO DRAG OMGG 😭💞💞💞💞
If it makes you feel better, I got better at writing! I think xd it's for other fandoms and I never post them, but the thought of you actually going back to read that story despite how broken my English was back then is both the best thing someone has ever said to me about my writings so far, but also terrifying Ghfhfh like NOOO why would you DO that to yourself it suucks the plot was all over the place and the pacing/characterisation was terrible :'D I might draw them again one day now that you mentioned them tho...just for you and the people that remember these dorks HHH 🤭
#ask#and i really appreciate your support drag i meant it!#you have got go be one of my most persistent mutuals cause i can't remember a day where i haven't seen you reblog my works-#no matter if it's an ask or a writing or art you just keep popping up in my notifications as soon as you're active and i can't bro#I can't even express just how happy your presence in this blog makes me but i really hope you know that#cause if anything i miss YOU guys the most like fr!!! what would i even do without my wonderful talented mutuals oughgh :')c#just for you man im gonna try and maybe. just MAYBE revisit that au and tweak it up ro my liking ...maybe even write more who knooows#muah muah thank you thank you SsssO much yet again for passing by<3333
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It's gonna be so funny whenever I end up updating ITNL bc my opening notes r gonna be like "hi sorry for being gone for so long, I wrote a vw smut one-shot (link in the end notes), got a new girlfriend, started playing BG3 (The Time Sucker), quit my job ive had for 8 years, and THEN my dad died so I've been dealing with probate and packing his house up and moving his furniture. Been a busy few months. Anyways, lets get to it,"
Like it really has been so eventful. God damn.
#speculation nation#havent moved the furniture yet but it's likely to happen b4 i next update#im thinking i can maybe start writing again soon but im gonna be working on my reverse bang fic first#most immediately bc i need to have a certain amount of it done by april#but also. For Reasons (that i cannot talk about publicly by rule of the event) i think it will be good for me to write.#cathartic! hopefully. we'll see.#trying to egg myself on. i can totally write more. totally. i can do it. i can.#(pls encourage me i have written only 2 paragraphs in 2 months and it is very scary to start up again)
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THE AKUDAMA DRIVE STAGE PLAY IS NOW AVAILABLE!!!!!
#akudama drive#rave ramblees#I included every file as well as photos of everything included#unfortunately the booklet was on shiny paper so perfect photos could not be achieved#getting auto generated subtitles didn't work so we're all just gonna have to learn japanese and cry about it#I wish i had access to lofter to go share this around the chinese community#I'm working on finding a site I can upload a torrent to lest my link get copyright striked#nyaasi unfortunately closed guest uploads and registrations so i'm trying for 1337x#yk i've been working on this since yesterday and like#i haven't actually WATCHED any of it yet#yall get to see it before i do because i have to go work soon#side note but while it was hard to find exact numbers online on the length of the play#i got numbers around 90 minutes#THIS IS NEARLY 3 AND A HALF HOURS LONG W H A T#and there seems to be two different showings recorded#there's also like 3 backstage interviews which are...absolutely worthless without subs#this play better be good even if i don't understand a single word of it#i paid so much for this T_T#everyone better spread this link around so the 10 people in the fandom can enjoy it#also worship and appreciate me please i worked so hard to get this 🥺#maybe also send me $200 too <3
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thinking more,,
#i cant help but feel horribly heartbroken every time i hear whats happening in gaza as well as so many other places#it feels like-- like none of this had to happen#i guess ive never even been in the same universe as someone who even sees one death as a solution#let alone thousands#as a jew especially it feels horrible#like this happened to us. and we're just doing it to someone else??? why??????#because if you walk into someones home kindly they will take you in. walk in with a gun and theres gonna be tension#i dont understand at all#and like maybe im naive. maybe im just young and my brain hasnt developed yet#and when im an adult ill understand how people could ever think war solves any problem#but. i just think its literally never fixed anything#sometimes people suck. should NOT kill them over it#and thats not even true in this situation!!! israel fucking sucks and theyre the ones commiting a genocide here!!!!!!!#if you walked in peacefully none of this wouldve happened#pass over is soon. and we'll say prayers and eat matza and have lots of food#and those across the globe will do the same. and yet they are murdering people#and we'll be in our safe warm houses and they will be dying#shouldnt there be some way to help them all???? america is one of the richest countries in the world and we're actively hurting them..#i genuinely cant fathom how people could ever think like that#i dont think evil exists but then i look at the world and i realize weve gotten pretty damn close#and yet i still have to wake up tomorrow#and i still have my own life to live#and the world doesnt stop for me to mourn strangers#i hate all of it. why cant we just be nice to people#anyways. ive just been trying mostly to avoid this topic esp online#this is my little safety zone and ive never really been one for politics; esp things that i dont understand#yknow i dont wanna spread misinfo; and at the same time i dont have the energy or knowledge to fact check#plus the whole emotional toll in a place that i just wanna unwind in#idk. i think im starting to feel like i cant just ignore all these posts anymore. im kinda starting to feel like i wanna scream#all of this really fucking sucks. this shouldnt be happening
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AUGHHH
#vent below#cant stand it here i need out im ao fucking depressed i have nothing to do until the school semester starts i want to *** *** ***** ****#sooo badly i wanna **** ****** YOU DONT EVEN KNOWWW qhat am i even working for anymore im a talentless loser hack with no future#no matter what i tried to do i think ill just end up going down the same path as my dad so maybe i should just **** ******* BECAUSE LIKE#damn apple doesnt fall far from the tree where do i fall have i even fallen yet like GODDAMN#im so .. depressed womp womp im gonna*** soon if nothing changes#GIRL WHOS JUST LIKE HER DAD somethit sometbing always going to be an angry man. i dont fucking know#its been years girl why the fuck you still hung up over him 😭😭#daddy and mommy issues pick a side CANT HAVE BOTH#sorry i want to **** ****** rn let me vent on main if you have a problem with it idk#maybe im an unloveable abusive piece of shit or maybe i will become that AWFUL THOUGHT I DONT LIKE IT FUCK. guy whos spiraling hard rn#talentless loser hack wholl end up like his dad whos laughing lol#i am
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i honestly love your streams they’re so entertaining i can’t wait for when you get back on it
AW thanks guy :] tbh i felt like a really dry and uninterestin person when i streamed so its reassurin to hear it was fun to watch when i did stream !
#snap chats#im a really awkward person i feel so it always baffles me to read i was Somewhat entertaining to watch durin streams jvleakjvlake#ive been wanting to stream all summer but i was either too busy to actually stream what i wanted#or i just wasnt feeling it. ive been wanting to do art streams again for a while#though what ive doodled during my downtime has varied from rgg so im not sure if anyone would really care to watch that#i still doodle rgg- i havent posted anything ive doodled since they didnt feel post worthy to me#but with time we'll see !! i know i def wanna stream the rgg stream later in september#and i wnna have at least SOME streams done beforehand just so yk. ease back into it all#but yeah ! hold me to this gang i'm gonna look into streaming on youtube maybe friday next week#not saying therell be a stream anytime soon but i just wanna look into my options so i CAN plan to stream soon#i miss hangin with people ..#...also i havent beat lost judgment yet vJAELKVJAE#I SWEAR I MEANT TO I JUST GOT BUSY and then i felt awkward about not playing it on stream#i thought id finish it off stream but. Again. Busy. so i might as well resume it on stream#but those are plans for the not-near future ..
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WELL JESUS FUCKING CHRIST
#PK;M BILL∆#EVERYTHING'S GOING TO SHIT AND I'M BACK FOR HELL KNOWS WHAT REASON#I'VE EXISTED HERE ON AND OFF SINCE 2013. FUN FACT.#ALL OUR FRIENDS ARE GOING THROUGH IT.#*WE'RE* GOING THROUGH IT TOO WE'RE IN HELL.#ONE GUY UP FRONT ISN'T VERY HAPPY WITH THE STATE OF ANYTHING. KEEPS ASKING IF HE CAN DIE YET.#AND LIKE I GET IT BUT ALSO NOOOO SIR WE AREN'T DOING THAT.#BE GLAD ROSEBUD ISN'T HERE SHI'D RIP YOU A NEW ONE FOR EVEN ASKING IF YOU CAN DIE YET. ANSWER'S NO BUDDY! SORRY!#I DO HOPE THINGS SETTLE DOWN SOON. THEY BETTER OR WHO KNOWS WHAT'LL HAPPEN.#MAYBE ONE OF US WILL SNAP AND START ACTUALLY KILLING FOR REAL#WHO'S TO SAY! WE'LL FIND OUT THOUGH!#I THINK I'M GONNA GO SIT IN THE SHOWER AND GET A TL;DR OF WHAT I'VE MISSED THE PAST DECADE.
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in like a day or two i can get back to leveling ast thank the fucking twelve for that
#ffposting#i dont dislike blm but ive been having such a hard time actually doing my roulettes. been having a lot of headaches#also really bad sleep. i dont have the focus or energy for much. havent gotten groceries yet but i will very soon. that will help#once im done w the magical classes ive decided im gonna just. lvl all my lvl 1 jobs until like 49#then go for mnk & sam. get them to 100. switch to drg & rpr. get them to 100. then ninja can prob be at the same time as mch & brd#then the tanks for last bc i like tanking & also to save myself the faster queue times for last as sweet reprive & reward#but also. hm. i wont be doing alliance raids as tank i dont think. maybe for the 50-59 range for pal?#but like above that no. im not tanking mhach raids. i could possibly tank ivalice+pupbunk+motr but not mhach#OR copied factory bc i dont remember anything abt it. OR paradigms breach i am not fucking doing that fuck that#tank mains are the bravest ppl on earth. i love tanking but like i am not doing that.#maybe i could keep ninja for alongside the tanks? so it gets the alliance raids...?#but also itd be nice to have SOME way of getting heliometry tomestones without having to do hunt trains exclusively#or like running thaleia like a crazy person#i still havent continued arcadion. im scared. its probably not that bad but the way ppl talk abt it it feels scary.#hggg. all this is gonna take so much time. but i can do it. because of my love for the game. & for the grind.#i do enjoy grinding because i enjoy the game's content it's just really unfortunate that you have to queue for dps yknow.#especially in arr levels bc after arr you get duty support dungeons at decent intervals level wise#but in arr you get stone vigil at 41 & then nothing until 50 it's vile#& man i do NOT wanna queue for 30 minutes to go to the fucking aurum vale
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