#maybe I can find some motivation
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ap0t8t0 · 6 months ago
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🩶
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icewindandboringhorror · 2 months ago
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Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~
(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)
#ootd#jfashion#fashion#fantasy fashion#mori kei#....like... adjacent... lol#no idea what style this would be lol.. makes me think of like whimsical vaguely fantasy themed childrens book character#finally posting one of my aforementioned seven million drafts of actual outfits and costumes i have finished and edited#the photos for but just never feel like posting lol..#I need to find one of those people whos like 'omg i am ADDICTED to social media ugh i wish i could get off of it#im just browsing and posting like 60 times a daaaaay!!!' and take a little magical bottle and suck some of the social media#enthusiasim out of them. for moi. In exchange they can have some of my 'literally just never in the mood to post or interact with the#outside world ever' energy. We can balance each other. huzzah and so on#Though I think maybe it's part of the general thing I've heard of like.. I can't remember if it was in reference to adhd or just some sort#of general execcutive functioning issue type of thing - but the idea that things have to be ''just right'' before you do something. like#'oh i need to do this task. but i have to wait until XYZ first' or 'oh i can do this but only if X specific condition is met' or etc#The fact that I even have to be in a Specific Mindset to post. or sometimes will delay posting on social media because like 'oh well#I'm going somewhere tomorrow. somehow this matters. i cannot spend 5 minuts posting TONIGHT. clearly it will interfere#somehow schedule wise with the doctor appointment i have 15 hours from now. yes. yes. i must wait until my appointment is over#tomorrow afternoon. THEN i shall post' or etc. etc. lol. NOT even taking into account the many days#I just genuinely and physically sick and it's not even a mental thing. I just physically dont feel like sitting at the computer lol..#ANYWAY.. trying to get back into it. trying to get a business bank account.. make a proper paypal so i can start selling sculptures again.#selling clothes and sculptures.. posting about such things then of course as one must. etc... chanting to hype up and motivate myself lol#But yes. this is my favorite outfit out of the bunch so I am posting it first I guess.. maybe others later..#Also the purple dress says its from shein. which I've heard is bad fast fashion stuff. but maybe okay since its second hand? I havent#been to the bins since like 2020 or late 2019 even. and I think stuff like shein and temu has only become poular in the past few years#but I bet if I went to the bins now I might would find a good handfull of that stuff. Probably now not much different than what you#find in a walmart or a forever 21 or actual physical stores you can go to though. I hear quality of clothing is down everywhere no matter#where you get it or whatnot. What bountiful joys unfettered capitalism and exploitation bestows upon us (<being sarcastic).#Wearing one of my favorite little vests though. I love the texture of it and the clasps on it
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emosyzoth · 1 year ago
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tumblr user magowolor posts magolor art (CHEERING AND CLAPPIN) yup yuup mhm thats right
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wayfinderships · 3 months ago
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Good afternoon gamers!!! I miss F.inal F.antasy. I miss it a lot-
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sandraharissa · 1 month ago
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my desire to create vs my motivation for the whole show going down the drain cos wtf was that
fight
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purlpeiris · 6 months ago
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I’ve asked this a million times and I’ll ask again, why has nobody written Deep Night fic about Ken Seji and Pan? I’m so sad that I can’t find any.
Almost sad enough to write my own…. Maybe.
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batsplat · 27 days ago
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oxley bom pod was talking about the friendly atmosphere in the paddock today and they brought up vale as someone who would make himself hate his opponents in order to beat them. they mentioned biaggi before saying vale didn’t need to make up a reason there lol, and the gibernau, stoner, lorenzo, marquez. thought it was interesting to hear them say that especially since oxley specifically had a particularly close working relationship with vale!
got around to listening to the podcast rather belatedly + had a chat about this general topic that helped me organise my thoughts on this a bit. I transcribed the most relevant comments - probably some small errors because of cross-talk and like... I'm a fast transcriptionist but can't be bothered to properly do it, here:
O: One is because racing is so fucking complicated now. [...] They've got so much to do, so much pressure - to have the negative energy of anger and hatred is actually - B: It's a waste. O: It's a bad thing, you're just wasting your energy. I mean it depends on the character, okay - B: So maybe Vale was the last who really needed to hate somebody to give him - and now even Vale invites Casey to his ranch to ride with him. But he really needed to - It was not difficult for him to hate, but he - Some riders he really looked for a reason to hate them even more, because then he could dig deeper in himself - because he was just a happy chap - in order to beat them. O: Max Biaggi. B: But it was easy to hate Max! That was not very difficult. Sete Gibernau, basically he needed to try - O: Casey Stoner. Sete Gibernau. Marc Marquez. B: He hated Vale probably before Vale hated Casey! But that's another podcast. O: Yeah, I think so. No, definitely, definitely, definitely. [...] Some people - they get fired up by hating other people, and that's fair enough.
so yeah. I mean, qualified agreement, I guess? they're definitely right about casey hating valentino before valentino hated casey lol. if valentino ever really hated casey at all. which is not necessarily a mainstream take, so it's nice to hear it!
I also agree with this general take about... y'know, the creeping professionalisation of the sport and how that affects how likely you're going to get fun drama. goes beyond just hours spent looking at data and also about... having a bit of a life, having time to actually form a personality. and as I've said before, it's the fans! clickbait news + social media featuring partisan fans, who aren't just going to read every statement but also react to every statement like it's life or death shit. pecco and jorge have gotten push back for some incredibly, deeply, ridiculously mild comments these last couple years. they HAVE to phrase everything they say as inoffensively as possible while still getting their points across, and even then they'll generally be jumped. like, forget valentino, how do you think casey would have fared in this current media environment? up against a fanbase as partisan as valentino's - or marc's nowadays? not well is the answer! I think to some extent you can get away with this stuff more depending on people's perceptions of you, so marc and increasingly pedro will generally be fine... but on the flip side, the pecco's, the casey's, the jorge x2's of this world... everything they say gets read in the worst possible light, but now everyone's just so much louder about it
but this ask was more about valentino than the current landscape, so I'll get back to him. I do think it is a bit of an issue if you frame it as a completely either-or issue - at the end of the day, most competitors will probably motivate themselves through their enemies at least a little. pecco definitely uses negative emotions to fire him up, people criticising him and the like. casey absolutely used them, often directed at valentino. all the comments from the haters to fire them up right, to show everyone how wrong they are. on a psychological level, there is not something *fundamentally* different between using your rivals or the fans or the press to motivate yourself - it's still the same underlying motivational process (and indeed the podcast references lawson's distaste for the press). casey signs off his first every grand prix win by saying how nice it was to beat a spanish rider sponsored by the circuit, like are we calling that pure love for the game? he and mostly martin and to a somewhat lesser degree pecco do share a tendency to... believe the world is out to get them, and use that to fire themselves up. idk if casey strictly needed to do that or if it was just ingrained at a young age and became a stable self-perpetuating way in which he viewed the world but also, it doesn't really matter, right. maybe in both valentino and casey there is a pure unpolluted soul who could have enjoyed winning just for the sake of winning, but in practise it's clearly more complicated than that. as has been recently discussed in quite some depth in this parish, late 2007!casey was getting sympathetic interview write-ups that described his mentality as informed by 'bitterness and rejection'. including bitterness at valentino, who at that point in time was not meaningfully reciprocating any of that stuff!
so I do have a bit of a bone to pick with this idea of 'the last guy'. valentino didn't 100% motivate himself by hating his enemies, the blokes after him didn't do so 0%. I think of the aliens casey is probably the most similar to him by this metric... some are definitely less inclined to do so. lorenzo's a bit of an odd case where at times it felt like he was better at making other guys hate him than necessarily hating them himself... complicated guy but I think he actually really did want to mostly fuel himself in a positive manner, except then for various reasons both external and internal he needed to also draw a bit more from. the darkness. marc is more likely than either valentino or casey to just fight to win for the sake of winning... then again you do have cute little incidents like misano 2019 where marc - off the back of two back-to-back last lap defeats - miraculously happened to find an extra bit of motivation through a spat in qualifying after duly harrying the yamaha's all weekend. again, it's a question of degree, right. marc is just inherently less restless than valentino and less inclined to think the world is out to get him than casey, which are all contributing factors
with valentino, I think I disagree a teensy bit in terms of framing more than I do in substance. first off, not to be a broken record on this, but obviously all of these feuds were very different, involving very different emotional landscapes. I don't think it's correct to say valentino needed an enemy to fire himself up, but he did always need something. some mission to dig his teeth into, some way of making the whole thing exciting. of making it fun! I'm not all that convinced of this happy-go-lucky characterisation of valentino - a lot of the time he had to go to an awful lot of effort to keep himself entertained, and when that didn't work he could get pretty miserable. he needed to keep himself stimulated, he needed to stop himself from feeling lonely, he needed to give himself a purpose to work towards. hatred did help him in a motivational sense, and he's talked in his autobiography about how anger has made him ride faster. it's useful... up to a point. it's just not a uniform thing across rivalries
my sense is that it comes down to two things. 1) he needs something to motivate himself and get excited, be it a rival or whatever. and 2) he needs some distance from his rivals. motivating yourself through a rival is not quite the same thing as motivating yourself through an enemy. for instance!! casey was only really his enemy once they were no longer on-track rivals - it was unrelated to actual competitive calculus, and was in some ways more about casey than it was about valentino. when valentino did that shit to casey at laguna 2008, he's not like... mad at casey. he doesn't hate him. he's gleeful at least in part because of how obviously pissed casey is, but he doesn't hate him. because he doesn't need to hate casey to want to beat him! casey is already so considerable a challenge that beating him is reward enough in itself - he's this super tricky puzzle for valentino to work away at... and when he comes up with the answer at laguna 2008, he's delighted. he doesn't really hate jorge in 2009 either - dislike, yes, hate, no. he's already plenty stimulated by the challenge of beating his feisty young teammate... he doesn't need anything else. he gets through 95% of the 2015 season with barely any animosity with his title rival - there, he would have seen it as distracting from his primary mission of winning his tenth in a way that was entirely disconnected from any particular rival. he also runs into the problem that it feels like any psychological warfare feels like it's getting aimed more at marc than jorge - but that's entirely accidental, he isn't TRYING to fuck with marc in the middle of the season. why would he!! and jorge refuses to be fucked with on the track because he's just never in the same postcode as valentino, and valentino isn't attempting to fuck with him off the track. he's barely even doing like,, mild mind games, like they're quite actively friendly the entire year
(I do sometimes think you can do a bit of displacement here where you don't necessarily need to hate the person you're actively fighting to get the job done - cf marc at misano 2019, also... tbh casey 2011-12 kinda had that vibe where he was getting all that energy out of his system in valentino's direction and could then keep things civil with his actual title rival. there's a LITTLE bit of that 2015 even pre phillip island but mostly valentino does have a more early 2008 'we move in silence' vibe or whatever that pecco tweet read. this is the restlessness thing, right - he kinda needs to fill his brain with SOMETHING)
which brings us to the second element: needing some distance. zero problem with biaggi, which is kinda the training wheels feud in that it takes a bit of a life of its own before valentino REALLY was intending it to. he's a kid (literal eighteen year old) who's kinda snarky about biaggi in the press and biaggi takes it EXTREMELY poorly and confronts him about it and it kind of spirals from there. with casey + jorge, valentino ensures that they never GET too close. I do think there is an element of... y'know, not wanting to be close friends with the guys who are your title rivals, because it's harder to beat people you care about and deprive them of the thing they want most in the world. which I actually think is pretty normal!! valentino's problem is that on a few occasions he has ended up in rivalries with blokes he was at some stage close in - and either he preemptively withdraws as with marc and... ? probably...? melandri...? - or the relationship deteriorates and then blows up as with sete and also marc. the 'preemptive withdrawing' bit does suggest a degree of self-awareness with regards to his own competitive process - and as has been previously argued in this parish, valentino's relationship with marc developing as it did was in large part due to his competitive situation 2010-14. the two of them falling out was probably always going to happen if they were competing, the two of them falling out that badly required valentino's stint in the competitive wilderness to let him lower his guard to such an extent
so that's the argument in broad strokes. yes, valentino can use enemies to motivate himself - he certainly enjoys having rivals, he enjoys fucking with them, he enjoys figuring them out and measuring himself against them and also a little bit of competitive edge. that doesn't mean he needs enemies per se, or certainly he wouldn't have seen some of his rivals in quite such extreme terms (casey in particular of course felt differently). he did need SOMETHING to motivate him... rivals, definitely - enemies, perhaps. and he also needed a bit of distance from those he was competing against. which post-sete he tended to preemptively enforce, except that one time when he didn't, and when it wasn't preemptively enforced it did have a tendency to blow up rather spectacularly. so in essence, you still end up at the same conclusion, right - valentino did get a lot out of having enemies, did motivate himself with them, did need to beat someone. but the working process is a bit different as I see it. sometimes making enemies is about emotional regulation, y'know. feuding as a healthy outlet for competitive tension. as it should be
#'why does nobody do drama anymore' says local social media user who exorcised a rider they're not a fan of for a mildly bitchy comment#don't like to vague post but i remember posting that thing about valentino saying everyone's too nice these days#and seeing some interpreting it as a dig at pecco. but like i'm pretty sure valentino has a baseline level of sympathy -#- for the amount of stupid discourse pecco faces! that's quite literally *in the stuff he's saying in that interview quote*#//#brr brr#clown tag#batsplat responds#idk i do think there's SOMETHING about the idea that athletes are too busy to hate each other but...? surely not entirely#ive refrained from saying this before but like. full disclosure. just this once.#i think part of my problem is that EYE motivate myself in competition in quite a. negative way#so for obvious reasons i also find the casey/valentino approach way more instinctively relatable than love and friendship corner#*tennis player voice* idt hating people takes any effort at all#like this isn't distracting. it's easy#the real trick is hating them while also chatting to them in a friendly way at every opportunity to make it harder for them to hate YOU#and that's where we'll leave that!!#but idk maybe it's because where i come from u see people's faces when ur competing against them#like you are deliberately making somebody whose face you can see miserable!! you need to do SOMETHING emotionally about that#everybody needs to learn to manage this. if you're up 4-0 it's so fucking easy to feel pity and so fucking dangerous#some tennis players can go into robot mode or something but i can't!! i will feel something for my opponent so it cannot be empathy#idk if this is 100% projection but my sense is with vale he kinda inevitably engages with the people around him for better or for worse#and if you're like that you do kinda have to make sure you really really really want to beat your opponent. otherwise you have A Problem#i think a lot of discussion of the psychology of these guys could do with returning to how they are actually there to like. win shit#u don't always have to pathologise that like it is Part Of The Game#'five feuds is the sign of an empath' no i'm not saying that. but i do think he's an emotional rider and not everyone's quite like that!!
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soars22 · 9 months ago
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Wait wait wait wait wait wait-
So I have this idea, right? That I’ve mentioned in comments/tags somewhere possibly maybe? About Dapper and Pomme escaping the island with the French because I’m Big Sad and I know Bad’s probably planning some angst about them being gone and I’m not about that right now (my name is Root Beer Dr. Pepper and I’m happy endings until I die).
So like, basically, everyone gets off the island and it’s slice of life and Bad stays behind to take down the Federation and along the way he and Cucurucho get together become roommates and like, Bad’s like “I can fix him!!! (I can make him worse!) and then Cucurucho like, goes along with it because he’s bored and anyway the point of this word vomit is that when Bad eventually escapes and finds everyone Cucurucho is with him like your strange aunt who no one likes but is too afraid not to invite to dinner or possibly like a particularly persistent strain of herpes.
The Islanders: what’s that?
Bad: a smoothie!
(It’s Cucurucho. He’s wearing Bad’s bathrobe)
And everyone hates him but he can’t really do anything by himself and he’s honestly too busy fucking bothering Bad to do much to anyone.
I think this was going somewhere but I forgot. I’m very tired.
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kuromi-hoemie · 2 months ago
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the boys sleeping over this week and I'm going shopping with my manager this weekend...
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i love them.
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sculptambitio · 3 months ago
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/ What gets me about D.iavolo's ending is just;; how decisive it is- stories where the end is a silent capital dot drive me insane, like there's a melancholy to it that I can't put into words, it feels like a real scary dot you know? scary because it is so definitive- there's no sentence forward, no pages forward, it's also why (and this will sound insane) humpty dumpty's story makes me feel some kind of poetical and melancholic way, the way it ends as
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men Couldn't put Humpty together again.
theres no 'coulds' nor 'might' , there is no hope at the end, he just can't get put together again. and that's it, IT DRIVES ME INSANE!!! it's the way humpty or d.iavolo cant fix this themselves, and no one can fix it for them either, its once again, a final dot, there's no future to it
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throughdarkeningskies · 3 months ago
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fascinating to see posts where it's like. someone taking a phrase with a specific meaning and insisting that it can actually mean Anything At All Whatsoever. i get what you're trying to do here but words have meanings for a reason
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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 4 months ago
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I'm way too excited to read mermaid Suguru. Just from the snippet in already kicking my legs with how sassy this man is, needing his specific saltwater like a princess.
And it'll be a perfect read for the park by the sea near mee
SOBS …. thank you sm anon :’3 i’m so happy you’re excited!!!!! he’s our most beloved sassy princess….. the more i write the more i realize reader is basically his butler LMAO but i …. kinda like that dynamic 😭
and wahhhh, i’m so jealous!!!! :’) that’s the perfect place to read it…… maybe i should go to the beach while writing it too actually……….
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medicinemane · 5 months ago
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Really really don't get why so many people seem to have this burning hatred for Ukraine where they'll just... bring them up randomly purely to drag them through the mud and it's like... ok... but... do you actually know a single thing about Ukraine or what's been happening there?
Do you for instance remember when a major dam was destroyed by russia causing massive ecological damage?
Like I'm dead serious here, can you tell me a single thing that's happened in Ukraine in the last 2 years? Can you in any way demonstrate any basic understanding of the situation?
Cause if not... why do you think you should have an opinion on it, especially if your opinion is gonna be how awful people getting bombed are?
Just legit bothers me and... even more so bothers me the number of smart and caring people I see doing this. Basically I'm not even trying to be rude here, I'm trying to remind you to pay attention and remember that not everything you read on the internet is true, a tumblr post isn't a source unless they're giving you a reputable source
Cause like me? I can go track you down articles about the Nova Kakhovka dam being destroyed, and I can talk about all the reason why it's pretty clear that russia destroyed it
Can you do the same for me? Can you back up your claim about Ukraine with something concrete?
In many ways I'm not even asking you to support Ukraine, I get we have a limit to how much we can focus on, it's ok if you focus on your cause and I focus on mine and... both of us giving our undivided attention, maybe we both make some small impact on the world
What I'm asking is you don't be an asshole for no reason. You don't need to throw Ukraine under the bus. Don't you think your cause stands up on it's own two feet?
And again I'm not Ukrainian, I don't know as well as someone there, though... I spare you a lot of the stuff that crosses my dash because I don't want to burn people out with horrible stuff, but please understand it's worse than you probably think
So no, not Ukrainian, but I'll tell you why I'm still worth listening to: I've followed this every day since the invasion began. I keep my ear to the ground. I do know a fair bit and again can back what I have to say up
Anyway, my plea is to just not be a dick to people for no reason. The correct number of bombed civilians is zero, that's my stance
#still fucking haunts me the video of this zoo keeper just crying as she films the flooded zoo#and you can just hear all the animals screaming in terror as they slowly drown#and... there... there just wasn't anything anyone could do#the water was coming up too fast... they didn't have time... they didn't have the equipment to move them#it was really only the birds that survived cause they at least could fly away when their enclosures were opened#I really do mean haunt; like... the second I think about it... just kind of gnaws at my insides#and that's just one video of one thing from one event#anyway; to pivot slightly; not that I want to call everything I disagree with russian propaganda#but there's various stuff I can point to and draw a pretty solid line between it and russian propaganda I think#as in; if I popped open sputnik right now I think there's a fair chance I'd find an article on it#...like the biolabs thing; that one I literally did that with and guess who was spreading it? the literal propaganda site#like man... you're smart; you're so brilliant... why on earth are you falling so hook line and sinker for this stuff?#Ukraine ain't your enemy man#where as russia; again I can draw a direct line between them and say... the suffering of the Iranian people#between russia and the election results in Venezuela; to my understanding russia literally has ships off the coast right now#and it's a fact putin congratulated maduro despite there being a number of issues#such as... the total percentages released by the government totaling 109%#listen man; I'm not stupid; I'm susceptible to propaganda too; you think I don't know that?#but I can at least show my work and I can at least explain my motivation and I can at least lay it all bare#maybe I'm wrong... maybe#hard for me to think I am when I see hospitals being bombed... kinda tend to think the people who do that are bad#(and why... why do people keep making it a pissing match instead of saying 'it's bad no matter where it happens'?)#but maybe I'm wrong... at least I can walk you through why I'm coming to the conclusion I am#and just fuck me... all I want is a world where no one's getting blown to bits for the crime of being alive#do you actually have any grasp of geopolitics?#not as in like... this or that theory or some bullshit about why america good; america bad; whatever#I mean can you actually draw a line between things happening around the world and tell me how they relate?#like... can you talk about India in relation to other countries; can you talk about Modi's politics?#(I can't stand Modi and I think I have some pretty good reasons such as his treatment of the Muslim minority; he's a nationalist)#can you talk at all about Turkey; or Armenia and Azerbaijan?
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seventh-district · 5 months ago
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I'm probably far from the first person to say this, but you can't tell me that this song doesn't just scream Aventurine, c'mon.
#like. i don't even need to explain it do i. the lyrics are Right There they speak for themselves#aventurine#hsr aventurine#honkai star rail#hsr#Seven.txt#music stuff#panic! at the disco#p!atd#another song + character commentary post wow mayhaps i'll start making more of these but i fear people and their Opinions#but whatever. if i don't distract myself with a silly little tumblr post im gonna have a meltdown so. here. character commentary be upon ye#anyways listening to this and thinking of Aven gives me chills every single time i can't help it#as usual if u disagree feel free to keep that shit to yourself this is just my opinion let me have it in peace#Spotify#'oh but it's too Positive! he's actually miserable inside! he wouldn't embody this song that's just the mask he puts up!!!'#yeah ur right. and who said i wasn't talking about the mask#i'm not saying that this song embodies his truest self necessarily. but i think it does suit Some aspect of him#maybe the side that's trying to keep going. the side that picks him up off the floor and pushes himself out into the world day after day#forcing himself to find whatever scraps of hope he can hold onto. the song doesn't say '*Had* to have high hopes' for no reason#i dunno i'm just spitballin here. there's plenty of ways you can see Aven in this song. if u Want to#if you've never peeled urself off the bathroom floor and washed tears off your face while playing the most upbeat song you can find-#-to try and summon the motivation to keep going in spite of how u just spent 20mins wishing for it all to be over. well#well then u just can't understand my vision here
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du-hjarta-skulblaka · 6 months ago
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Ugh right fine I'm doing a food log until I can fix whatever funk I'm in and it's uhh...not great lmao
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ennuidays · 9 months ago
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its not serious Ur not serious ab it An ur motives r stupid n hold no real life value
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