#matching fits bc we are wives

[venusrobots]

zaaaaaayn ^_^

[atopvisenyashill]

WHERE HAVE ALL THE STARK WIVES GONE AND WHERE ARE ALL THE COZ'S

aka i made the stark family tree from torrhen, the king who knelt all the way to the starklings & filled in some gaps too just for funsies. behold my magnum opus because i am a visual learner. some notes on the tree:

at the start of the tree, you’ll notice some lines are purple. those are not technically canon relations - we know those people existed but we aren’t told how they’re related or who their wives were. similar to my dornish timeline, i filled in a few gaps here based on the information we have to go off, some leaps in logic when it comes to the politics of the time, and some math.

similarly, you’ll notice some names in {brackets}. those are characters that we know exist but we don’t know their name (ie, we know alaric had two sons, we don’t know their names). i picked their names from other stark names.

the kids aren’t always in age order. i couldn’t get the graphic to line up in places bc of the cousin marriages and still keep everyone in age order, so i just gave up aksjd.

all the ones with the book sigil were Lords of Winterfell. all the ones with the show sigil were just born into the stark house.

alright now we got some explaining & rambling below the cut

george give the wives names. george at least give them a house. george pls you don't have to give her a personality just give her a freaking name george.

anyways!!! first things first, let's go into the names and houses i invented for everyone, starting from Torrhen's wife on the left and moving to the right:

Lady Manderly, the last Queen in the North - i think given the Manderlys are the #2 house, it was thematically fitting that the last Queen in the North was a Manderly! I also think it would make sense, given how common Iron Islander raiding was in this time, that Torrhen would want to strengthen his alliance with the house that owns his fleet. We also know the North’s fleet was pretty damn impressive at this time - Aegon uses them to fight several times after Visenya destroys the Vale’s fleet during the conquest.

Lady Dustin, wife to Brandon the Boisterous - Torrhen’s sons hate the Iron Throne and they’re all really pissed at the Stark Maiden-Ronnel Arryn marriage, so I figured Torrhen’s sons would want very fierce, very Northern wives (no offense to the Manderlys). Given Barrowton is one of the only true cities in the North, I thought marrying a family familiar with travelers, maybe a richer house even, might be seen as a benefit to staying strong against the Iron Throne.

Lady Flint, wife to Brandon the Boastful - Similar to Lady Dustin, I thought a strong Northern match would be what the sons of Torrhen would continue to go for. The Flints of Widow's Watch are considered the most powerful of the Flint houses so I thought that made a good match.

Lady Norrey, wife to Edwyn Stark - this one was fun & required some math and analysis. Basically, we know none of Alaric’s sons are married when Alysanne comes to visit, and Alaric is succeeded by his grandson, because both of his sons die before him. It means his grandson could be at the oldest 14 when he inherits. We also have Gyldayn say that some “Stark brothers” looked into seeing if Alysanne giving the New Goft was legal. I thought if Alaric & his sons were so annoyed by this, wouldn’t it make sense to marry into a house near the New Gift, who perhaps will be impacted by the decision and have the knowledge of the area and its history? Since the Norreys are right on the border, I thought that would be a good fit. I also thought it would be a good fit because Cregan married Arra Norrey just a bit later - and one pattern I noticed is that when a family marries into the Stark line once, they tend to remarry each other within a few generations again. They do this with the Blackwoods, the Lockes, AND the Royces - it’s likely the mothers & grandmothers influencing the matches, and I thought it was a fun pattern to repeat.

Lady Reed, wife to Artos Stark - So one thing we know is that Lynara Stark, Cregan's third wife, is not descended from the uncle who attempted to usurp Cregan but from a younger son of Brandon the Boisterous. I also noticed Lynara's son, Brandon, has an affair with a Fenn. The Fenns are sworn to House Reed, so I thought it made sense that this branch of the Starks has perhaps lived in the Neck, and brought a small household with her that included a Fenn or two that her son later has an affair with.

Lady Glover, wife to Ellard Stark - this is another “marry & remarry” match up but there I chose the Glovers also because I noticed the Starks tend to marry into the same few houses over and over again. These are likely their richest vassals and closest allies, so I thought again it would make sense that Ellard would pick a woman from a wealthy or important background as the succession crisis under Jaehaerys starts to kick off (in preparation for a fight, even if it's just a war of words). Since you have Gilliane Glover just a bit down, and I thought that would match up nicely with the "marry and remarry" trend as well.

NOW SOME ANALYSIS

Obviously there's been a lot said about the Sansa-Jonnel and Serena-Edric marriages that I don't really need to repeat at length but - I think the choice to have a Sansa and a Jonnel One-Eye marry is kind of sus, I think the "One-Eye" thing is sus, I think the niece-uncle connection here is kind of sus, and I think the fact that their mother was a Manderly is also sus.

There's also the fact that Serena has several sons and we have no idea what happened to them. That one stands out to me because of the Cregan-Lynara match; as stated above, Lynara is not, as some people assume, the daughter or granddaughter of Arnolf, the uncle that attempted to overthrow Cregan. Her Stark name comes all the way from a younger brother of Brandon the Boisterous. That's quite a few generations back that a Stark line has survived to remarry into the main line and we don't even know if she was an only child or had brothers and sisters. So Brandon's brothers' weren't just mysteriously offed/died out, but just two generations after Lynara, all of Serena's descendants just mysteriously die off? Nah, there's a story here that's hiding. The obvious suspect here is The She-Wolves of Winterfell story with Dunk & Egg. COMMA BUT. It's crazy that there are no Stark cousins in the modern day, no cadet House the way we have the Arryns of Gulltown, the Green Apple Fossoways, the Lannisters of Lannisport, etc., and also equally weird that Lynara's Stark line isn't a named cadet branch.

But let's get into the cadet/cousin branches in the modern day as well - one thing I noticed about the lack of Stark cousins in recent history (ie first and second cousins rather than like, seventh and eighth) is that a lot of them are female line cousins. Catelyn and Robb point this out in the book when Catelyn brings up the Vale Starks in the Templetons, the Royces, and the Waynwoods. I think the fact that Sansa is in direct contact with a host of those same families will come into play; perhaps when she unmasks herself as Sansa, someone will comment on her resemblance to Jocelyn, or maybe that familial connection will prompt a bit more loyalty out of one of Jocelyn's descendants if she has to make a mad dash out of the Vale.

And this is the same with Lyarra; she had a sister, Branda, who married a Rogers, which is a very minor Stormlands house. That stuck out in my head because I think this all really sets up the North to be ruled by Sansa; there are no male cousins or even female line male cousins (shout out Targaryen cousin Robert Baratheon) to step in and say "Well wouldn't you prefer a man as the Stark in Winterfell?" It's just Bran, Rickon, and Jon Snow that could possibly threaten her rule. It seems like she's very set up to echo her predecessor here but instead of Jonnel marrying her to steal her claim, Jon is likely to back up her claim, same as Bran.

And since I'm talking about namesakes here, let's dig into Arya Flint. There's two big associations here for Arya - Brave Danny Flint and the Wandering Wolf, Rodrik Stark. I think it's interesting that he served with the Second Sons, given that Arya is a Second Daughter, rather than the Stormbreakers, which was started by Oscar Tully. The moniker itself, Wandering Wolf, also makes me a bit excited for Arya's future; I've said before but I want Arya to do everything she wants to do and being so closely associated with a "Wandering Wolf" makes me think she will. The Danny Flint connection is also interesting here - there's the fact that Jon Snow, the sibling she's closest to, joins the Night's Watch (and even makes reference to Danny Flint), the fact that Danny dressed as a man and fought with a sword. Similar to the "Wandering" epithet potentially spelling out a happy ending for Arya, I am hopeful she'll have a happier ending than Danny Flint. But I do wonder if perhaps Arya will have some involvement with the Night's Watch, however it exists in the endgame.

Lastly - I'm so curious about Harrold Rogers. Did he help facilitate the friendship between Ned and Robert? Are the Rogers' still kicking around looking Starkish as hell? George where are all the cousins!!

[graysonshmayson]

ok not a character playlist BUT some from my batman playlist:

song that is pretty accurate to the character's story

Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls- Bruce + kids dynamic

All These Things That I’ve Done by The Killers- batkids,

Motion Sickness by Phoebe Bridgers- more batkids daddy issues

song that doesn't fit the character at all but i was thinking about them while listening to it on loop

Wonderwall by Oasis

Never Tear us Apart by INXS

Flagpole Sitta by Harvey Danger

My Own Worst Enemy by Lit

Renegade by Styx

Lukewarm by Penelope Scott

song that has one or two lines accurate to the character's story

august by Taylor Swift- Dick + Damian as batman and robin (specifically the parts about how "you were never mine" :( get it bc he's not dick's son)

Rose Colored Boy- Dick + Jason

Two Slow Dancers by Mitski- i think dick and bruce want to go back sometimes

Thumbs by Lucy Dacus- "You've been in his fist ever since you were a kid. But you don't owe him shit even if he said you did. You don't owe him shit even if he said you did". CMON!

mirrorball by Taylor Swift- dick grayson/tim drake trying to heal bruce "I'm still on that tightrope, I'm still trying everything to get you laughing at me. I'm still a believer but I don't know why. I've never been a natural. All I do is try, try, try. I'm still on that trapeze, I'm still trying everything to keep you looking at me". I've never been a natural all i do is try is especially tim drake coded.

song that just kind of is the vibe of the character

Lil Boo Thang by Paul Russel- Dick

Yellow Brick Road by Elton John- Jason

Bug Like an Angel by Mitski- general batfam blues

Blue Hair by TV Girl- Tim

Paper Rings/Lover by Taylor Swift- dick + barbara

Alíen Blues by Vundabar- jason todd

Feels Blind by Bikini Kill- stephanie brown

song that i desperately wish they would listen to because i personally like it

Vampire Empire by Big Thief

Christmas Kids by Roar

champagne problems by Taylor Swift

Cruel Summer by Versus Me- dick would fuck with this so hard

Happy Together (feat. Ray Toro) by Gerard Way

Seventeen Going Under by Sam Fender- robins specifically!!

song that fits with the character so well its scary

Rule #4: Fish Inside a Birdcage by Fish Inside a Birdcage- SO DAMIAN AND DICK CODED WHAT THE HELL. LISTEN TO IT RN.

The Moon Will Sing by The Crane Wives- DICK GRAYSON ARE YOU KIDDING ME. "All those empty rooms, we could have been anywhere, anywhere else. Instead, I made a bed with apathy. My heart knew the weight, ten years worth of dust and neglect, we made our peace with weariness and let it be" is so good for like the harsher realities of being robin and being the son of an emotionally unavailable and mentally ill man. plus the whole concept? "I shine only with the light you gave me"? SO robin core because he gave them EVERYTHING and then they have to exist without them?

Wrecking Ball by Mother Mother- very jason todd but more importantly

Would’ve Could've Should’ve by Taylor Swift- EVERY LINE OF THIS SONG is about jason todd!!! idc if you don't like taylor, if you like jason (ESPECIALLY catholic guilt jason like i do) check this out. I can't even quote specific lines because its so him. maybe in another post. I'll just leave this: "God rest my soul, I miss who I used to be, the tomb won't close, stained glass windows in my mind, regret you all the time. I can't let this go, I fight with you in my sleep, the wound won't close, I keep on waiting for a sign. I regret you all the time"

unsure why this song is in the playlist but it's so ingrained in my mind as 'part of the playlist' that it would feel weird to remove it

Harness your Hopes (B-Side) by Pavement

Rät/Feel Better by Penelope Scott

Creep by Radiohead

an additional genre i’d like to include is:

“this song doesn’t canonically related to the storyline of this character but it matches perfectly with elements of their backstory i have made up”

18 by Anarbor- OK so this actually inspired so much by @duckytree's take on teenage dirtbag dick grayson but in my vision he dates roy after moving out in his teenage rebellion era and bruce does NOT like him dating roy lmao. "long hair and tattoos"... and roy gets that its a phase but is super into it anyway and they party hard together. this is canon and real to me. there is no alternative meaning to this song.

Moving in Place by Shauna Dean Cokeland- similar to the previous, this is teenage dirtbag titans!! fucking around on a beach in SF. check this OUT: "The world just ain't ready for us yet, that's it" says the guy to your left, you would die for that kid. Watch his eyes as they get sorta distant and different, and we're moving in place again, we're moving in place again. It sure is fun to hate something you'll love when it's gone. This time, it's everywhere and everyone at once. From moving in place to moving on, to moving on, to moving on, to moving on". Soooooso titan's coded.

right where you left me by Taylor Swift- to most people this is just another t swift song, but to me, it is actually about how bruce is frozen in time in his head after his parents death and cant move on

Tim I Wish You Were Born a Girl by of Montreal- i am ur average TimBer enjoyer but the merits of TimKon cannot be ignored and this sososo reads as Kon lamenting about Tim after he gets with Bernard, my poor boy...

character playlists always should have the following:

song that is pretty accurate to the character’s story

song that doesn’t fit the character at all but i was thinking about them while listening to it on loop

song that has one or two lines accurate to the character’s story

song that just kind of is the character’s vibe

song that i desperately wish they would listen to because i personally like it

song that fits the character so well that it’s scary

unsure why this song is in the playlist but it’s so ingrained in my mind as 'part of the playlist' that it would feel weird to remove it

[tatargiia]

after hours: timeskip!miya atsumu x fem!reader

notes: none bc i'm 100% proud of this. he's hot ok...

warnings: nsfw, unprotected sex, strength kink(? idk i love his buff arms), slight choking, degradation, mentions of breeding :3

Dating a pro athlete had its downsides. For once, you weren't allowed to send him anything lewd during practice because it was just protocol (and because you rarely sexted). You also weren't allowed to have sex in the locker room after a bad match (this was decided after Suna Rintarou caught you with your hand down Atsumu's shorts after they had lost to Suna's team).

The list was more or less what you guys couldn't do sexually than it was romantically, but hey, you couldn't care less.

Because there was some things that made up for those pathetic rules.

"What the fuck is your problem?" Atsumu groans, shifting uncomfortably in the love seat as you purposely pressed your bottom against his aching cock. You turned and smiled innocently at him, offering your glass of champagne.

He snarls, but still snatches the glass from your hand and downs it. You're in a club right now, nothing special. But the whole MSBY Jackals team was here, and of course as Atsumu's fiancé, you were obligated to come.

The first part of the escapade was fun but nothing too special, with you mingling with the wives and calling up a few drinks here and there. Now, you were in a VIP booth with Atsumu that overviewed the rest of the club.

"Atsumu," you singsong, cooing and leaning backwards to press your naked back against his to provoke him even more. You knew exactly what you were doing, wearing the tiny and skimpy silk dress that exposed your entire lower back.

He glares you down. And then before you know it, he's snatching your wrist and dragging you down the halls of the VIP bar, earning you both whistles and jealous stares from girls and guys like.

"What are you —" before you can even finish your sentence, he throws you inside a room, pressing you against the door as he kisses you feverishly. You can hear the lock of the door clicking somewhere behind you, and you smirk.

"Shut up. Whores don't get to speak." he says as he undoes your the silk material holding your tits together. When the material falls from your chest and your tits bounce out lavishly, he moans and presses his face against them like he hasn't seen them since forever (which is a lie because he saw you in the shower this morning).

"Atsumu, baby, are you horny?" You tease, pressing your manicured nails against his nape and teasing his hot skin with your cool hands.

"Shut up." an empty but strong, tanned arm reaches for your neck, and you silence immediately. He continues his administrations on your skin, leaving pools of red and purple in his wake, a blood bath of lust trailing from your chest down to your pelvis.

It feels so good, you're not even going to deny it at this point. Atsumu is a literal sex god, his cock his big and thick, and he knows damn well what to do in bed every single time. It turns you on so much, you have to resist the urge to scratch his arms and leave marks.

His hand doesn't clench around your neck anymore, but it's still hovering faintly. But the thought of him manhandling you and taking your breath away, quite literally, sends a rush of endorphins down your spine.

"Turn around," he orders, and your weak body can't even comprehend anything as he turns your body himself against the door, pressing your tits against dark oak as you feel him slide the rest of tonight's dress down your thighs.

Even though your faced is pressed against wood, you can hear the sound of him throwing off his dress shirt and kicking the oxford shoes to the side.

"You're glistening, baby. Want me that bad?" he coos, teasing a thick, calloused finger in your folds. You squeal, trying to reach behind your back and grab his hand, but his arms won't let you, holding you in place as he stands in amusement, staring at your cunt.

"Your cunt is dripping, want me to fill you up? Make you pregnant with my cum?" you know he's just teasing you, trying to get a rise. But he's planted a seed inside your brain, and in your catatonic, extremely horny state, it makes you clench your legs together and let out a string of pathetic moans.

"Yes, yes please! Fill me up please," you beg desperately, spreading your legs to the best of your ability, making sure to show off your dripping cunt to Atsumu that was practically made for him.

"Do you love me that much?" he says, mouth fanning hot breathes over your shoulder, pressing his body against yours. You shiver under him.

Now, you're completely under his control.

"Yes, I love you so bad. Please, just fill me up!" you cry, and he listens. You haven't even been prepped, but that escapes your mind as soon as he thrusts in, his cock ripping your folds and you let out a loud moan.

"Shut up, bitch. Don't want anyone seeing you taking my cock like a slut now, do you?" you close your mouth and shake your head furiously, letting him have his way with you as he thrusts harder and harder.

You can still hear the thumping sound of the music outside, but it's starting to fade out as the lewd sounds of his cock inside you fill your ears. Sometimes, just to get him harder, you clench around him, and he bares his teeth with a loud, almost animalistic growl.

At this point, your body is reaching overstimulation and you feel like you're about to collapse. But like the good fiancé he is, Atsumu can sense that and as soon as you feel your limbs failing on you, his strong arms reach to hold you as he fucks you against the door.

"Baby, c'mon. You got this," he whispers praises in your ear, and it's embarrassing to admit, but it's enough for you to keep moaning and shaking, spreading your legs even more as he fucks you senseless.

"Atsumu, tsumu.. I'm gonna cum," you whisper out breathlessly, smirking at him faintly before you reach your end. He smiles back, hitching your limp body up and thrusting faster.

"Come with me, baby." and that's when the rubber band snaps. You cum, probably the largest you've ever, just as soon as you can feel a rush of warmth inside you, some white trickling down between your legs.

You turn around immediately, to his surprise, and kiss him senselessly, grabbing his jaw with your frail hands.

"I love you so bad," you breathe out, looking up to him like he has stars in his eyes.

"I love you too, baby." he giggles, smiling as he presses more kisses to your red lips, calloused hands trailing your naked body for the marks he made.

"Ahem." you hear a voice from the other side of the door. "Atsumu, y/n. We can hear you over the dj's music." That voice. You snort, trying to contain a hysteric fit of giggles as Atsumu says,

"Shut the hell up, Suna."

[enthusiasticharry]

The Secrets You Keep

summary: you're a stripper, and you meet Harry off shift. what happens when he finds out?

request: hiiii would you be able to do something like stripper y/n? not where they meet at the club or anything but something natural like at a cafe or something but she keeps it from him bc she thinks he’ll leave her? then he has a guys night at the strip club and sees her perform? but he loves it and she’s a bit embarrassed? idk but that kinda vibe if ur up for it! X

word count: 8.3k words of fluff, smut and angst if you squint (and i really mean squint) also not proofread, sorry! 

masterlist    |    asks

It never occurred to you that once you left full time education you’d end up becoming a stripper. It wasn’t the occupation you had envisioned for yourself, but it was the one that paid the best money and even though it shouldn’t be — money was the thing that you needed the most. You lived in a small, one bedroom flat that you shared with your Grandma who had no income and little pension meaning that you was the only source of income for the two of you. Obviously it was hard upon you, but your Grandma had done so much for you when you were younger that you wanted to help her as much as you possibly could. Granted, finding a job as an eighteen year old that was enough to help pay the bills and for the treatment your Grandmother needed wasn’t the easiest, and that was how you stumbled across the club and the jobs there. Your Grandma didn’t know how you received your income, and you planned to keep it that way for as long as you physically could. 

“Have you got any private dances today?” Jocelyn, also known as Sapphire amongst the people in the club, asked as she started fixing her makeup in the mirror next to yours. 

“I don’t know.” You sighed, spraying a small amount of hairspray upon your curls, “I haven’t spoken to Elliot yet.” 

“Apparently some big shot businessmen are coming in tomorrow.” Ruby adds from the other side of you, applying a lipstick that matched her name to her lips. 

“Ugh.” Sapphire groaned, “That means old men with small dicks wanking to us instead of being with their probably very lovely, loving wives at home.” 

“They lust after the taboo.” You add, applying a small amount of lipgloss to your lips, “They want what they can’t have, and brag when they get it.” 

“They have money though.” Ruby shrugged, “Haven’t had many tips this week. I’d probably do anything for a couple hundred quid tomorrow.” 

“Not anything Ruby.” You turn to look at her, shaking your head at the younger girl, “Stand your ground. Don’t let them take advantage of you.” 

“I won’t.” She smiled, “I learnt from the best.” 

“And don’t you forget it.” 

As a fresh eighteen year old, just as Ruby was now, you could’ve only hoped for someone to help you and guide you through the trails and tribulations you endured at the club. That’s why you sort of took the younger girl under your wing and helped her as much as possible. 

It wasn’t a lot. Granted, with what they did the majority of it was on their own upon the stage or in a private dance but you wanted to make sure she had small tips to help her handle herself in any situation that could occur and that she someone to talk to if she ever needed it. 

“Are you working tomorrow, Emerald?” Emerald was your stage name. 

“No.” You sigh happily, “It’s my day off.” 

“Enjoy yourself, you deserve it.” Ruby smiled. 

You certainly did. 

The next morning, after helping your Grandma get ready and to the hospital, you make your way towards the small café you usually went to during your Grandmother’s chemo sessions. They usually lasted around three hours, and whilst you offered to stay with her, she usually forced you to leave and spend some time on your own, claiming she didn’t want you to see her at her worst.

The spring days had just started to warm up, so you dressed yourself in a summer dress you had picked up for cheap at a charity shop. You carried your tote bag with your book in over your shoulder as you pushed past the people on the street.

It wasn’t usually this busy, and looking around you saw no free tables but a few free chairs dotted around. Your favourite table, tucked away in the far right corner by the window had been taken by a man sat reading, just as you would’ve been. You toy back and forth with the idea of going to sit over there as you walk over to the counter. 

You order your usual, a peach iced tea, and wait for the kind barista to make it. Your free days, usually, landed sporadically. They normally occurred when your grandmother either had chemo or a hospital appointment and that’s only because she can sometimes be really ill after them and needed you to look after her. Even though Elliot was not a good person by any means, he understood your situation and did help as little as he could. 

“Excuse me.” The man looked up from this book at you, “Is this seat taken?” 

“Uh. . .” 

“It’s fine if it’s not!” Your quick to add, “There’s just no other seats.” 

“No.” Your smile falters, “No! I mean that the seats not taken. It’s yours.” 

“Thank you.” You drop your tote bag down on the floor, holding your hand out to the man, “I’m YN.” 

“Harry.” He shakes your outstretched hand. 

There was something oddly familiar about him, but you couldn’t quite place your finger on why. He dressed quite casually, a punny t-shirt that said something about health on it and you didn’t want to seem too weird and bend down to look at what he had on his bottom half but you suspected it was something just as interesting. 

You take your book out of your bag and place it on the table in front of you, flicking through the pages until you found the page you had left off at. 

As a child you loved to read. Your grandmother always read you a bedtime story before bed and it lead to English being your best subject at school. Whether it be the creative writing aspect, or the analytic — you were just good at it. It was your highest grade at GCSE, an A, and your highest grade at A Level, a B.

You didn’t exchange any more words with Harry the entire time you were there. Periodically you looked up at him, and somewhere deep down you hoped that he did the same for you but you couldn’t be too sure. The book that he was reading seemed interesting enough, something about watermelon, you had noticed. You had a slight suspicion that it wasn’t about watermelon but you could never be too sure you supposed. 

A whine almost escaped your lips when you realised that you had to go pick up your Grandmother and your book had just gotten interesting. That was the problem when you read, you could sit and do it for hours and not even look up. It was something so interesting to you that you could immerse yourself in a world different to the one you lived in and slip out of reality for however long and return back to normal as though nothing had happened. 

“Thank you for letting me sit here.” You smile as you pack your bag up, “Goodbye.” 

“Bye.” 

You left feeling sort of fuzzy inside. You hadn’t spoken to the man at all really, but he was kind and certainly handsome with his tousled brown hair and gentle smile. That was probably going to be the last time that you saw him, and you probably should’ve asked for his number at least but you didn’t and that was why you walked away with him laying heavy upon your mind.

The next day, you wanted nothing more than to leave in the middle of your shift and curl up on the sofa. Instead, you were stood in a private room in the back of the club swirling your hips for a man sat upon a chair in the middle. 

“You’re fucking fit.” He moans, and you almost throw up in your mouth. 

“Thank you.” 

You move yourself so you’re hovered over his lap, twisting your hips to beat of the sultry song spilling out of the speakers. If you didn’t need the money, or have a bills to pay you certainly wouldn’t be doing this. 

“Fucking sort.” That’s when his hand drops down upon your behind, squeezing the flesh harshly. 

You stand up, flipping around so that you’re looking at him, “Hands off.” 

“Babe.” He throws his head back, “C’mon I’ve paid bags for this dance.” 

“And you pay for a dance, and the rules state no touching.” 

He holds his hands up in surrender, “I’m sorry. Won’t happen again, babe.” 

“Better not.” 

It does, and that’s when you get up and leave. He still has to pay, which is a plus but it just isn’t the best feeling. The job you do isn’t one that people necessarily respect you for, but there are rules in place to help with that. You and the other dancers within the club were human beings and deserved the rights that any other person has. 

“You okay?” Ruby presses her hand to your shoulder as you powder your under-eyes, “I heard he was touching.” 

“Yeah.” You smile at her through the mirror, “Started behind and they he just full on groped me.” 

“Men are pigs.” 

“I second that statement.” You laugh, “But you know what they’ll say.” 

“That we teased and antagonised them to do it.”

Throwing her a deadpan look, you nod. It was something that you had dealt with for the past six years of your life and even though you did hate it and wanted nothing more than for the ground to swallow you up every time it happened — you had gotten used to it. 

“Did you have a nice day off yesterday?” 

“I did thank you.” You smile, “Read a bit. Spent some time with my Grandma.” 

“Sounds lovely.” Her face then twists into one that you can’t quite pinpoint, “You didn’t miss much here.” 

“The businessmen not up too much?” 

“No they paid well.” She nodded, “We just had to watch them wank their micropenises at us.” 

You curl your nose up at the thought, “That sounds pleasant.” 

“Totally.” She snorts. 

“Emerald. Ruby.” Elliot sticks his head into the room, “Get your asses back out there.” 

Ruby rolls her eyes and you laugh. Your job certainly wasn’t your favourite but some of the people around you made it more pleasant.

Two weeks later you find yourself sat in the corner of the café down the road from the hospital, your book open in front of you and a peppermint tea sat upon the table in a pot. Your Grandmother’s second round of chemo was slowly coming to the end of its stint and even though you wanted nothing more than for her to be back to the epitome of health, you would miss spending time at this small café. 

“Hi.” You lift your head up to see Harry stood there, slightly breathless, “Is this seat taken?” 

“It’s yours.” You smile, watching him drop his book on the table.

This time you could see his entire outfit. A white t-shirt with some writing on that you missed, a floral shirt over the top paired with red corduroy flares. You were right the last time that you met him —he did have an amazing sense of style. You, however, bought whatever was the cheapest or on sale that seemed acceptable to wear in public. 

“How have you been?” 

“I’ve been okay.” You smile, “You?” 

“Good, thanks.” He scratches the base of his neck, “I haven’t seen you in a while.” 

“Oh.” You have to stop yourself from smiling too much, “I only come when my Grandma has an appointment and they’re usually two weeks apart.” 

“Ah.” He nods before his face curls, “I’m sorry if that seemed creepy.” 

“It didn’t.” You can’t help the butterflies that erupt within your stomach, “I just thought I wouldn’t see you again.” 

“Couldn’t let that happen.” Heat rises up your neck as he beams.

“No complaints about that from me.” 

“That’s good.” He rests his hand upon his chest, letting out a deep breath, “Thought I was punching a little over my weight.” 

“You’re not.” You cheeks hurt from smiling, “It’s cute.” 

He looks down at his book. He seemed so shy, as though he had a confidence to talk to people but once they complimented him or something to do with him it completely changed. It was intriguing. He was already nicer to you than most people you’ve met of the opposite sex in your life and you’re let to learn anything about him apart from the fact that he reads Bukowski and likes black coffee — it certainly wasn’t much to go on. 

“How long do we have until you have to go back to your Grandma?” 

“Not long.” You sigh sadly, “I’m sorry.” 

“No, I understand, it’s okay.” He flashes you a small smile, “Can I walk you back to the hospital?” 

You ponder his offer for a second, “Yeah. I’d like that.”

You walk back to the hospital brushing arms with one of the nicest people you’d ever met, and you couldn’t be happier. 

“Has your Grandma been having treatment for long?” 

“It’s her second round.” You explained, “They originally removed the tumour and it went away but it came back. They caught it quickly and she’s back in bay 11 for three hours every two weeks.” 

“I’m sorry.” He sighs, “That must’ve been tough.” 

You shrug, “She’s a fighter, I know she is.” 

“I don’t doubt she is.” He smiles, “She’s got an amazing granddaughter to stay alive for.” 

The walk to the hospital isn’t long enough in your opinion. You speak about a few things, and you learn he does music and that’s when you put two and two together and realise that he’s actually Harry Styles from One Direction. Harry wished he could’ve recorded your reaction when you realised. 

Harry had never met someone like you, and he had met a lot of people in his life. You were sweet, and kind and so gentle but also confident and held yourself in such a strong way that he couldn’t help but want to know you, the real you. 

“This is it.” You stop in front of the entrance closest to the chemo ward, “Thank you for walking me.” 

“It’s no problem.” He smiles, “I hope this doesn’t sound too weird, but can I get your number?” 

“Uh. . . yeah.” 

“Great.” He beams, “At least now I won’t have to hope you show up at the café.” 

You swear you felt your heart burst. 

During your shift a couple of weeks later, you don’t notice your phone light up a message. You actually don’t notice at all until you arrived home that night. You had already checked on your Grandma, who was sound asleep in bed, and that’s when you allowed yourself to drop down upon the sofa with a sigh. 

Seeing an unknown number pop up on your screen at first had confused you, but once you had looked further into it, your palms started sweating. 

Hi YN. It’s Harry. I know it’s been a while but I’ve been trying to figure out what to say. I hope you and your Grandma are well. 

Your heart starts to beat faster. The message you had awaited for weeks was here and you had no idea how to act, never mind what too reply back with. The only thing that spiralled around within your mind was that he had been thinking about you. 

In your head, you imagined him pacing around in his large house trying to figure out what to send you, just like they do in the movies. You at least hoped that was what he had been doing over the past couple of weeks. 

Hi Harry! It’s lovely to hear from you, sorry it’s late. I’m okay, Grandma’s getting there. How are you? 

You throw your phone down on the sofa next to you, trying not to giggle like you did as a schoolgirl whenever you were messaging boys. You nearly cried whenever you phone ran out of credit and you’d end up having to run to the store to get a top up in the morning with your spending money and explaining to them what had happened. You were thankful that your upgrade didn’t need that. 

I’m okay. Glad to hear about your Grandma. I know this is probably really weird and totally out of the blue, but are you free this weekend? I’m leaving next week for a little while and I really want to see you before I do. 

In your head, you ignore the end of the message about him leaving and focus on the fact that he wants to see you. Harry Styles wants to see you. You hoped it was a date, everything pointed it to be a date but you didn’t want get too ahead of yourself. 

You haven’t had a boyfriend since your first year of Sixth Form, and the first date you were going on since then was going to be with Harry Styles of all people. 

If you pull some strings, work an extra long shift on Saturday and please some of Elliot’s special clients — you may be able to get Friday night off. It was a maybe, but over the next two days you could make it a yes. You hoped that you could make it a yes. 

You’ve never, in your six years of working at the club, missed any of your shifts for anything other than your Grandma suddenly falling ill, and those were on rare occasions. You certainly deserved this day off.

I’ll have to check with my boss but I think I could do Friday night? If that’s not a problem for you. 

You have to bite your lip to stop yourself from internally freaking out. 

Sounds perfect. How about I pick you up at 8? 

You wince. It wasn’t as though your were embarrassed of where you lived because you weren’t. You’ve worked hard to be able to pay for the flat and everything in it but there was something about showing it to someone who you’ve only just met and had no intention of explaining your situation to wasn’t on the top of your priority list. 

Is there any chance I could meet you somewhere? 

Of course. Where do you fancy eating? Italian? Thai? 

Italian sounds good. 

Great. I’ll send you details over. 

Thank you :) 

See you then, YN. Sweet dreams. 

Night, Harry. 

You slept well that night. 

“I just don’t think I can spare you Friday.” Elliot sighs, “I’m sorry YN.” 

You have to stop yourself from wanting to cry. You don’t use up all your holiday days, and you work way more than you should or that you’re paid for but you don’t complain and you just get on with it. The one time you ask for a shift off, his stubborn ass says that he cant do it. 

“Please, Elliot.” You sign, tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear, “I just need this day off.” 

“And I need my best girl on the floor. Need the best of the best.” 

“There are plenty of other better girls than me working here.” 

He shakes his head, “You’re the favourite, YN. Need you to be there.” 

“Elliot.” You sigh, leaning forward in the uncomfortable seat you were sat in, “I’ve worked for you for six years and I’ve never asked for a day off like this before.” 

“Yeah but—”

“—and! I’ve never asked for a day off apart from going to the hospital and you know that.” 

“I couldn’t exactly say no to you—”

“I’ve worked every shift you’ve ever asked me to, covered for people when you need it.” 

“Stop it!” He holds his hand up to silence you, “Just shut up for a second.” 

You clamp your lips shut. If you didn’t need to stay on his good side to get Friday off you probably would’ve said something about how rude he was being. He’d always been rude, but he paid you and the rest of the girls so you all chose to ignore it. 

He ponders, and you know the cogs are turning within his brain as he scrolls through his laptop, typing a few things. He takes his glasses off his face and drops them dramatically down on the table in front of him. 

“Ruby will cover your shift.” 

You let out a sigh of relief, “Thank you!” 

“Don’t be thanking me too quickly.” He points his finger, “I need a favour from you.” 

“Anything. Well not anything.” 

“In a few weeks times there’s a big birthday party coming in.” He explains, “I need you to be the star of the show, do private dances and all the good things like that.” 

“Just that?” You ask, knowing that it could be a trap knowing Elliot’s track record. 

He nods, “Just that.” 

You look at him sceptically, “What’s the catch?” 

“No catch.” He holds his hands up, “A few big names are coming, that’s all. A list celebs that have asked to use the back exit.”

“That’s it?” 

“That’s it.” 

“Let me know the date and I’ll do it.” 

You stand up, happy that you’ve managed to get your shift tomorrow off and that you can go on the date you have been excited for since you met Harry and was introduced to the world with him in it. 

“Have fun at your thing Friday.” 

“Thank you. . .?” 

You don’t think you like Elliot being nice to you. 

Friday night rolled around quickly and you were thankful for that. After helping your Grandma with her own dinner and into bed, you start getting ready. You curl your hair, brushing it out until its in what looks like effortless waves but are actually quite hard waves to achieve. You do natural makeup, something completely different to makeup you usually wear in one of your shifts. You try to keep all of your features soft, different to how you usually look on a day to day basis. You dress in a long white polka-dotted maxi skirt, paired with a thin long-sleeved jumper that would keep you warm due to the ever changing British weather. 

You had done a little bit of research on the restaurant Harry had sent you the address for and learnt that it wasn’t the most expensive restaurant ever, but one that was way out of your price range. It meant that you had to dip into the fund that you keep for occasions where you need a little extra money or you will use in the future when you eventually move out and busy your own place. 

The tube was crammed, seeing as though it was a Friday night and the majority of people were either coming home from work and stating to go out for end of the week drinks. You knew that the club would start to become heaving as the night grew and a part of you was thankful that you didn’t have to work today, and you were given a small break from the hell that is working at a strip club. 

The restaurant, when you arrived, definitely looked fancier than it had online. The bar stood against the corner wall, the right hand side of the restaurant had booths covering the walls whilst stand alone tables scattered around the rest of the room.

You were surprised when you saw Harry, already sat at the booth in the far right corner. He lifted his hand up in an awkward sort of wave and you couldn’t help but beam at him. He had a shirt, an expensive looking white shirt with a yellow and blue jumper over the top. You hand felt so excited to see someone since when your Grandma went into hospital for her tumour being removed and you couldn’t see her for a few days. 

“YN.” He sighs, “Hi.” 

“Hi.” You smile, slipping into the booth across from him. 

“Was starting to think you wasn’t going to show up.” 

“I’m sorry.” You tuck your hair behind your ear, “I underestimated how bust the tube was going to be.” 

You can tell he wants to pry but instead he says, “It’s okay.” 

His nails were painted yellow, a few of them painted lilac as well. There was something so simple about his nails that you just loved, and if it wasn’t weird you probably would’ve stared at them for way too long for it to be acceptable. You knew he had tattoos, and you could see the cross on his hand and the the anchor peaking out from underneath his shirt and you wanted to see more. 

“I like your nails.” You smile, running your own fingers over your own nails underneath the table. 

“Thanks.” A blush creeps up his neck, “I did them last night. Sort of calmed me down, I was quite nervous.” 

“Nervous for what?” 

“This.” He nods, “I haven’t been as nervous for a date in a long time.” 

“You don’t have to be nervous.” 

In your twenty four years of living, you’ve never had someone say that they were nervous to see you. You’ve been nervous to see and do many things in your life and you hoped that somewhere along the line it would’ve been the same for somebody else and yourself but you had the slight suspicion that wasn’t the case. Hearing those words out loud, coming from someone who you’d never expect it too was special, and you were going to keep that for as long as you physically could. 

“I did.” He looks down at the table briefly, “I’ve never liked a girl as much as I like you before.” 

“You don’t really know me.” 

“I’d like to get to know you.” 

That’s what you do. For the rest of the date you don’t stop talking. Even though you’re starving and could eat your fist, it takes you the longest you’ve ever taken to eat your food because of how much you spend it talking. 

You’re just about to dig in to your desert when your body physically halts, “Why didn’t you want me to pick you up?” 

“I, uh, I—”

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t what to! I know I can be pretty invasive sometimes.” 

“No, it’s fine!” You take a sip of your drink to swallow down the dryness within your throat, “I don’t live in the nicest building, or in the nicest area and I guess I was embarrassed.” 

“You don’t have to be embarrassed.” 

“But I was.” You drop your eyes to the plate in front of you, “I know I shouldn’t have been and that it was stupid but I just didn’t want you judge me before you truly knew me because of where I live.” 

“I hope you know now that I wouldn’t have done that.” 

“I do.” 

You let Harry drive you home. Even though you would never admit it to his face just yet, you really liked him. He was kind, sweet and funny and everything you could ever want in your person. You haven’t said this in a long time but you love the person you are around him and you wouldn’t change it for the world if you didn’t have to. 

He stops in the car park outside the building of flats you live in and you can tell he’s thinking deeply about something but you try to not concentrate on that too much. 

“I would invite you up.” You laugh, “But I don’t think the sofa in the middle of my Grandma’s flat whilst she snores in the next room is the most romantic.” 

He scrunches up his nose, “I can’t say that it is.” 

“I’m sorry.” You drop your head to look at your hands that are tested on your knees, “I really wish I could offer you something. Anything.”

“It’s okay, YN.” He uses his finger to move your head up so that you’re looking at him, “I don’t expect anything from you. I hope you know that.” 

“I know.” 

He hesitates for a moment, and you can feel the finger that was rested upon your chin move upwards so that its upon your cheek. You flicker your eyes closed and just mask in the feeling of his touch against your cheek. 

“Can I kiss you?” He asks. 

You eyes open as you nod your head, letting out a shaky breath at the sheer surprise you feel at his words.

“Want your words, darling.” 

“Please kiss me.”  

You close your eyes again and you feel his lips touch yours. It's light at first, but you can’t contain yourself and you end up pushing closer to him, relishing in the feeling of his lips upon yours. Your fingertips grip the collar of his shirt, trying to pull him closer without hurting himself too much on the centre console. Even though you both don’t want to, you pull away as you start to loose breath. 

“You okay?” Your chest heaves up and down as he speaks. 

“Never been better.” You sigh, resting your forehead against his. 

“Good.” 

You kiss again, this time its more passionate and you can’t help but let out a small whine as he pulls away. The smug look on his face after hearing that sound was enough to send your stomach doing flips. 

You really didn’t want to do this, but you had too: “I have to go.” 

“It’s okay.” He smiles, “I understand.” 

“Okay.” You reach for the door handle. 

“I have to go away for a bit.” He sighs, “I’m writing some music over in America but when I get back, do you want to maybe go on another date?” 

“I’d love to.” 

He presses one last kiss to your lips and you leave the car, muttering a small, “Bye.” 

You feel giddy. As though you’re sixteen again and just come back from your first date with your first boyfriend. It was something you hadn’t felt in a long time and in all honesty, you had no idea how to handle those feelings. You certainly wouldn’t admit that you screamed quietly into your pillow in excitement that night. 

You couldn’t wait for him to return home. 

Two weeks. Harry was away for two weeks and even though you had only kissed him once, twice if you actually count how many kisses there were, you missed him more than words could explain. You weren’t one to usually message first, so you did end up waiting until Harry had a spare moment to message you which wasn’t as often as you would’ve liked but you couldn’t complain. 

You almost felt as though you had been drip fed this new life with Harry in, only to have it taken away quicker than you could blink. It wasn’t forever, and that was probably the thing keeping you sane. This had all happened in such a short amount of time but you wouldn’t change it for the world. 

The only thing that limited how far you could take this was your job. 

Harry had obviously been curious and during a text conversation in the first week of his week being away — he asked what you did. After having a small freak out you decided to say that you worked in a bar. It was a small, white lie and you hated yourself for it but telling him that you were a stripper just didn’t feel like the best thing to do at that time. 

You just weren’t ready to tell him, and that was totally okay. 

Speaking of your work, tonight was the night of the big party that Elliot made sure you could come to. The club had held celebrity parties before, so you weren’t entirely nervous but every time someone mentioned it you could feel your heart speeding up slightly. 

“Emerald.” You turn to look at Elliot who’s trudging towards you, a bag in hand, “Here’s your new outfit for tonight.” 

“New? I thought I’d just wear the one for special occasions.” 

“This is a special, special occasion Emerald.” He dropped the bag down in front of you, “Wear this.” 

Taking the material out of the bag, your mouth dropped open at the sight of the emerald green lingerie in your hands. It was delicate lace that you feared you’d rip if you weren’t too careful. Putting it on, your breasts slightly spilled over the lace, and whilst your front was covered, the thong back of the lingerie left your ass on full display. It was beautiful, you couldn’t dismiss that but you just hadn’t ever worn something so skimpy before. You pulled your black silk robe over your shoulders, fastened your black heels onto your feet and made your way towards the side of the stage. 

The skimpiness of the new lingerie did send more butterflies to the pit of your stomach than you were originally hoping for but it was only another hurdle for you to get over which you knew you’d be able to do. 

You heard the music start to play, you slipped your hand through the gap in the curtain and opened it, revealing yourself to the room. 

Here goes nothing, you mumble to yourself. 

Harry’s jaw dropped at the sight of you on the stage. It certainly wasn’t his usual scene, a strip club, but it was a friend of a friends birthday and he had kindly been invited and he wasn’t about to turn it down. He wasn’t in the band anymore, and certainly didn’t have to hide that he went to places like this anymore, even though they weren’t his favourite. 

He couldn’t bare his eyes off of you. The way your body moved to the rhythm of the song, your darkly manicured nails pushed the robe of your shoulders, exposing the delicate lingerie you were wearing. Harry would be lying if he said that his cock didn’t start to stir at the sight. 

You. The girl who he thought spent her days reading, and looking after Grandma had a secret persona that he only wanted to explore more. 

“My word.” One of the men in the group spoke, loudly so that everyone could hear him, “She’s fit as fuck.” 

“To get my hands on her.” 

Harry clenches his jaw, and his fist that rested on the arm of his chair. If he wasn’t in a very public place where people could record him, he’d give that man a piece of his mind. He probably would but he’d do it when nobody was around so the man could truly understand what he was saying to him. 

“Do you think I could get a dance with her?” The birthday boy asked. 

“It’s your birthday.” The dickhead with no morals spoke, “She might give you something special as a present.” 

“The rules say no touching.” The words slip out of Harry’s mouth before he can stop them, “So I highly doubt that.” 

“I’m sure you’d be saying something different if you were in his position, Styles.” 

Harry rolled his eyes and focused his attention back on the stage, watching as you seductively bent down to pick up some of the tips that had been thrown on the bottom of the stage. The song was slowly finishing and Harry couldn’t help but feel a little bit of disappointment bubbling within him.

Harry watched your lean legs as you strutted towards the side of the stage, flicking the long wig on your head over your shoulder, seductively running your tongue over your bottom lip as you pulled the material of the lingerie down from your breasts. 

Harry bit his lip, his leg bounced, he ran his hand up and down his thigh. He tried to do everything in his power to distract himself from the rousing within his trousers but he just couldn’t do it. The flimsy material dropped to the floor, your red painted lips curled up into a smirk and you made your way behind the curtain, not showing any of your truly bare skin. 

If you hadn’t been imprinted on his brain before, you certainly were now.

You could hear the grunts and groans of happiness, and a few cheers whilst on stage but the lights were so bright that you couldn’t see anything past the first row or so. The tips you had received were good, and you were pleased about that. 

You received your robe and bra back from the stage and pulled them back onto your body. Your solo dance was always a hit for Elliot, and you supposed that was why he’s kept you on for so long and if you were honest, they were the easiest to do. Private dances always made you too uncomfortable, and in the six years you’ve worked there there had only been a handful of people that made you feel comfortable when it came to private dances. 

“Emerald.” Elliot walks in smiling and you assume everything is swell on the floor, “They fucking love you.” 

You nod your head, muttering a small and awkward, “Thank you.” 

He hums, “You’ve been requested for a private dance, and he’s promised to pay you accordingly.” 

“Really?” 

Another hum, “Room Two. I think he’s already there.” 

“Thanks.” 

He leaves the room, a bounce in his step. You suppose that this is a good thing and he’ll finally get off your back for the time you took off for the date with Harry. You at least hoped. 

You checked yourself. You made sure your makeup still looked flawless, your breasts sat perfectly within the material and your arse looked good. You brush through the wig once and make your way towards room two, the smaller of the three private dance rooms which helped it be more intimate. 

You smiled at the bouncer at the door, Gerry, a man who looked as though he could kill someone with a single punch but was actually a massive teddy bear. He was good at his job of keeping everyone safe and making sure that the bad eggs that came in left just as quickly. 

Watching the door slowly open, Harry felt his heart stop. He had been pacing up and down the room ever since he had walked in, and only just stopped when he heard the creek of the door. He couldn’t believe that you were in front of him, and you certainly couldn’t believe that he was in front of you either. 

“YN. . .” He sounded breathless. 

“Harry?” He could see your chest rising and falling at a quick pace, “What? How? I thought you were in America.” 

He scratches the back of his neck sheepishly, “I got back last night.” 

“Why are you here?” He can hear the lump in your throat as you speak, your eyes glossing over. 

“A Birthday party.” 

“Yours?” 

“No!” He’s quick to interrupt, “A friend of a friend. It’s not mine. Mine’s in February, and I certainly don’t think I’ll be having my party here. Not that there’s anything wrong with here! It’s lovely! You’re lovely! I’m rambling.” 

He was so gosh darn cute and if you weren’t in the middle of a break down, you probably would’ve laughed or at least reacted to his little word vomit. It was probably the quickest you’d ever heard him talk, not that it was hard. 

After a few minutes of contemplating what to say, you sigh, “I’m sorry.” 

His voice is soft, his features falling, “What are you sorry for?” 

“Lying to you.” You drop your gaze to the floor, trying to suppress the tears, “I didn’t want to.” 

“Hey, hey.” He walks over to you, placing his finger underneath your chin just like he had done in the car weeks ago, “No need to get upset, I’m not.” 

“You should be.” You bottom lip quivers, “I lied to you and I had no intention to retract that just yet.” 

“YN.” He rests his palms on your cheeks, “I’m not angry. I’m not upset. I just want to know why.”

“I was scared.” You admit, trying to do anything but look up at him, “I didn’t know what you’d think or if you’d change your mind.” 

“Change my mind about what?” 

“Wanting too, you know. . .?” 

He shakes his head, “I wouldn’t. There’s no reason for me to.” 

“I’m a stripper Harry, it gives you full reason to not want to be associated with me.” You lift your hand to wipe your under-eye. 

“I’m not judging you, YN, I said I wouldn’t.” 

“I wouldn’t be upset if you did.” 

“YN.” His voice is stern, more so than it had been, “I don’t care that you’re a stripper.” 

“You don’t.” 

“No.” He smiles, “I don’t.” 

“Fuck.” You let out a breath of relief, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.” 

“I don’t mind.” He shrugs, “If you didn’t want to, you didn’t have to.” 

You had never met someone like him, and no matter how many times he surprised you that was just fact. Granted, you hadn’t had time to date anyone with looking after your Grandma but another reason you didn’t was because of what they would think of you. 

You knew that not everyone would be was understanding and lovely as Harry had been, and that was just because of the lovely person he was inside and out. That was the reason you didn’t tell him, because even though you had an inclination that he was accepting but you didn’t know whether that was just a façade or he was like that in real life. You loved that he was like that in real life. 

“Can I be honest?” You nod, “I enjoyed it.” 

You bite your lip to suppress the smile that threatened to cross your lips, “You did?” 

He hums, beaming a smile at you. 

“If you wouldn’t mind.” The corner of his lips tugs upwards, “I’d still love to get that private dance.”

You roll your eyes and thwack his shoulder playfully, “If you must.” 

“I’ll wait for you.” He nods, “Until your shift is over, if you want.” 

“Please.” 

“I’ll see you then.” 

You hadn’t even made it completely into Harry’s house before his lips were on yours. He pushed you up against his front door before he’d even shut it properly, his lips falling upon yours with a hunger you hadn’t felt since you last kissed him. 

Maybe it was his hands rested upon the small of your back, your fingers threading through the curls at the nape of his neck. 

“Can I offer you a drink?” He smirks against your lips. 

“Not the priority.” You reply, not bringing your lips away from his. 

“Noted.” He places a kiss to your jaw, “Upstairs?” 

“Upstairs.” 

You follow him up the stairs, your hand rested firmly in his. You’re too distracted by the man in front of you to take any notice of the house or where you were going. 

Harry had kept true to his word and waited for you. You secretly wished that you could have recorded the group’s reaction as you walked towards him, a small smile on your face. After bidding them goodbye, the two of you jumped in a taxi that Harry had ordered and made your way to his house, or what you expected to be his house and you weren’t disappointed. 

The second you step into the plushly decorated room, you’re kissing again. His hands slide down to rest upon curve of your ass, his ring-clad fingers immediately squeezing the flesh. You groan lightly into his mouth, allowing his tongue to slip through her parted lips. You grip his bicep as he leads your backwards into the room, your calves hitting the bed as he does so. 

Your lips part, you fall back onto the bed. You look up at him through your eyelashes, your fingertips reaching to pull the shirt he was wearing over his head. You almost swoon there and then at the sight of the tattoos littering his skin. You lean forward and place a kiss on his lower stomach, just before his happy trail that slips into the band of his trousers. 

You bite your lip, grinning up at him. 

“What are you planning?” 

“I don’t know.” You shrug, “What do you want me to be planning?” 

He groans, “Anything at this point.”

You reach forward, taking the button of his trousers in your fingers. You look up, “Is this okay?” 

“More than okay, baby.” 

You unbutton his trousers, wrapping your finger in the waistband and pulling them down. You can already see the tent in his boxers. You wondered how long he had been like this, you wondered if it had been since your dances. 

You blush slightly as you hook your fingers now into the waistband of his boxers, looking up at him. You can’t handle the look on his face, the slight blush but the boyish grin mixed with his curls that had fallen forward upon his forehead. You pull the fabric down, exposing his hard cock. You watch as it hits his stomach briefly, the tip swollen. You lift your hand up, wrapping it around him before giving him a few pumps. His stomach quivers as you do so, a groan escaping him as you wrap your lips around his tip. His eyes flutter closed as you start to bob your head, his fingers reaching forward to grab your hair into a ponytail. 

“Fuck baby.” His hips involuntarily buck forward. You sink further down, going as far as you could. 

Harry couldn’t believe how good he felt. It had been a while since he had been with someone, and it was worth the wait. You pulled away too soon in his opinion, but the sight of you, all teary eyed and sloppy sent his mind spiralling. 

“God.” He bent down and wrapped his arms around your thighs, lifting you up so he could move you further up the bed, “You’re fucking killing me here.” 

“Good.” You giggle. 

He’s quick to remove your shirt, allowing you to pull your jeans down at the same time. He didn’t expect you to still be in the lingerie from earlier, and if it was physically possible, he swore his cock hardened even more. 

“Fuck me.” 

He leans forward, pressing his lips to yours again as his fingers fumble with the latch of your bra. You bite your bottom lip as he wraps his around your nipple, flicking it with his tongue. He uses his hand to knead the other one. You can’t help but grind your hips forwards, a feeling bubbling deep in the pit of your stomach that you hadn’t felt in a long time. 

“Harry.” You moan, withering under his touch. 

He kisses down from your lips, to your jaw, down your neck until he’s littering them all the way to the band of your underwear. 

“Is this okay?” 

“More than okay.” You whine as he lets out a breath upon the thin material. 

He pulls your underwear down, teasing you by placing kisses across your thighs and pubic bone. He’s so close, yet so far from the place that you need him the most. He licks a stripe across your centre, until he wraps his lips around your clit. You can’t help the moans that escape your parted lips as he nibbles and flicks your sensitive nub, her thighs starting to shake as he coaxes her closer and closer to her orgasm. 

“Don’t stop.” You thread your fingers through his hair, “God! Harry.” 

He pulls away, and you let out a shaky breath as he does so. 

“No fair.” You whine. 

“Life isn’t.” 

“Just shut up and get a condom.” He does as you request, placing a small peck to your lips as he reached over to grab a condom from the drawer beside the bed. 

You watch as he rips the packet open with his teeth, pulling the rubber down his length. He presses another kiss to your lips, catching her eyesight once more.

“Are you sure?” 

“More than okay.” 

He hovers over you, rubbing his tip up and down your wet folds to coax a moan out of your lips. He groans into your shoulder as he pushes in, biting down briefly to suppress the sound. 

“Don’t.” You moan, scratching your nails down his back as he starts to thrust in and out of you, “Let me hear you.” 

“Fuck.” You squeeze him slightly, “Do that again.” 

He speeds up, catching your lips as your hips meeting quicker, the only sound in the room being your skin slapping each others. You slip one of your hands between the two of you, your nimble fingers rubbing your clit. 

“Where have you been all my life?” You can’t help the pleasurable giggle that escapes your lips. 

“Feel so good, H.” 

After a few more thrusts, a couple more circles of her clit and she’s comes around his cock, squeezing him tightly as she did so. 

“Fuck, shit, oh god.” 

He continues to thrust in and out of you, coaxing you through your orgasm and towards his. He seems to go deeper and deeper until he’s spilling inside the condom, his moans louder than any you had heard before. 

“God.” He collapses on top of you, taking a few seconds to collect himself and let you collect yourself, “Haven’t felt like that in a long time.” 

“Glad I could be of some assistance.” You push the hair that had matted to your face off. 

“You should keep secrets from me more often.’ 

“I’m never doing that again.” 

“Good.” He pecks your lips. 

[mrskurono]

Hi Three! I’m glad that you’re doing well! Oh my gosh, I’m so excited! I can’t wait to read it. I need to read more Atsumu stuff but I’m excited because you’re the one writing it 💕 Also, I want to apologize ahead of time for writing such a long message!

One of my friends also doesn’t watch actor based shows. I had to pause or take breaks because there were times I didn’t really find any interesting dramas or I was too busy studying in college lol. I love Adventure Time! I should really catch up on that!

Iwa, Oikawa and I have a group chat where we talk about our dramas. I think Oikawa would get offended if we watched an episode ahead of him but I also think that Oikawa “looks” like he’d watch that aha. He would tease Iwa when he notices that Iwa starts dressing like one of the actors from a drama and he’d tease me when he sees me cut my hair like one of the actresses xD

Okay Three, you’re making me blush because I would say “prove it” and freak out when Atsumu attempts to kiss me because I have to pause the drama even though he’s already tackling me 😅 Gimme kisses Atsumu!

I love that whenever you share your thoughts on Atsumu! They’re so good and I’m like they’re such a cute couple T_T It’s okay, that’s how you know he’s your anime husband!

I’m curious what you consider slutty clothing for guys. I’m living for this headcanon because I imagine Atsumu wearing athleisure when we’re home. But now I’m imagining Atsumu wearing stuff that shows off his arms or wears tight shirts because he knows I’ll ogle him xD

Thank you Three! I only interact with a few people on Tumblr and y’all are so welcoming. It was the first time I saw people talk about their self ships! I find it wild that there are people who hate on self ships.

You’re right! We watch fiction so we can enjoy it. OT4 ship! I love it! I think I saw your post about it with Rae Hehe! Kid and pet headcanons are the best! While I do like thirsty fics, I’ve been thriving with fluff and comforting headcanons! I love that we can all nerd out <3

Thank you so much! I’ve been overthinking some stuff recently but hearing that makes me feel better because I’ve been trying to not stress myself out. I will stay hydrated and work on taking care of myself! Oh my gosh, it’s okay! Sometimes I forget to check Tumblr so I get all excited when I see your reply regardless of when I read it! Please stay safe and take care Three. Have a good night and sweet dreams of Atsumu 😊

I just never got into real life dramas and shows. There's enough of that crap irl pls give me princesses and wizards and dragons. Also Adventure Time's finale was breath taking and I lowkey still cry every time I rewatch it

Oh my god the slander out of Oikawa's mouth if he noticed you picked a certain hair cut or Iwa picked up a shirt that suspiciously looks like one of the characters clothing. Totally the pot calling the kettle black though when he teases you both about it but the week before you watched an episode without him and Oikawa had ten screaming fits. Plus Oikawa 100% freaking gets fancy haircuts to match "hot actors" he's that kinda guy lolol

Eww god I think Atsumu is my husband. God when did I end up liking Atsumu this is embarrassing 😅

Don't ask my but I so see Atsumu (and Oikawa) in a god damn femboy hooters outfit. Shirt twisted on the boobies and daisy duke shorts to match. I guess slutty could just be shirtless and low hanging sweats. But also booty shorts and crop tops on these fine looking hunks pls. Lemme be good boys all pretty and dressed up

I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to share with me! I know self ships can be kinda personal and even now I feel weird sharing my own sometimes. But 100% fuck anyone who wants to shit on self ships or self inserts. ffs its all fiction and every character you like is just the authors god damn oc. Indulge and think about your anime husbands and wives bc god damn the serotonin ain't free around here we'll take what we can get!

[allofthismatters]

What about Avalance sharing clothes before and after living together

Ok, Avalance sharing clothing slays me. Because they definitely share that tan jacket and you can tell by the way their style has evolved that they’re either sharing or at least influencing each other.

I have probably said some of this stuff before, but I’m saying it again because wives sharing clothes is my kryptonite.

-If Sara was at Ava’s place and needed to run outside to get the mail, take the trash out, etc, sometimes she would just slip on Ava’s running shoes, which were too big for her, and just shuffle down the driveway, occasionally trip a bit and hope no one saw it.

-Sara started having Gideon fabricate her shirts a little bit big so they’ll fit Ava, because she knows she likes to sleep in Sara’s clothes, especially if they’re apart.

-She stops sleeping in Sara’s clothes a few weeks after Sara gets abducted, because they smell like her and it makes Ava wake up half-consciously reaching for her only to remember she’s gone, and the pain is too much. She puts away Sara’s pillow too and Ava only takes any of her things out when she wakes up missing her so bad she can’t breathe and feels like it’s going to crack her chest in half.

-After they’ve had sex, Sara usually pulls on whatever Ava was wearing if she needs to get up, and the sight of her clothes on Sara, hitting her like mid-thigh, makes her warm and soft inside.

-The whole ring situation: Were those all originally Sara’s rings and they just migrated to Ava’s hands? Does Ava just own similar rings? Will we ever know?

-Ava has a big heavy bathrobe that she wears after she showers in the winter bc she hates being cold. Sara makes fun of it because it’s huge and an ugly color and Ava’s dramatic about being freezing. But when they rescue Sara from space or wherever she is, she’s sick and freezing and Ava brings the robe into the medbay and tucks it in around Sara, and it’s the first time she lets a few tears out during the whole ordeal. It’s something about that little detail, this one stupid thing that she loves to hate, that makes her realize she’s home and taken care of and with Ava again. 

-When they first got together, one day they got caught in the rain and Ava gave Sara a sweatshirt to go back to the ship in. Sara would never admit it to anyone, but she wore it to sleep that night because it smelled like Ava and never gave it back.

-Now that they live together, they have their own sides of the closet, but Sara steals things from Ava all the time. She doesn’t mind, but Sara never puts them back where they belong (you know, probably in color order or something), and that’s what gets to her.

-Sometimes they accidentally get dressed and end up matching each other. When they realize, they’re like “No, nope, absolutely not, we don’t do matching clothes, ew.”  

Wow that got long, I promise I’m done. 

[love-bean]

Spectacular - Part 4

alright duckies, this is going to be the final part before the epilogue, which is quite short (might end up uploading that tonight). let’s go!

wk: 1597

-o-o-o-o-o-

On the eleventh of April that year, Benedict began formally courting Anastasia. Having spent countless days together, it was to no one’s surprise when he asked for her hand in marriage not one month later.

Benedict paced nervously across the length of the drawing room.

“You are making me nervous, friend,” Alexander sighed. “What could be so important that you have summoned not only my father, but the four of us?”

Benedict paused, looked at the five men in front of him, and resumed his pace.

After a few more minutes of watching the Bridgerton pace, Arthur stood up.

“If you do not have anything to say then I shall be going.”

“Wait!” Benedict said, eyes pleading.

“Well?” Arthur challenged.

“I-”

The words were caught in his throat. He could not bring himself to stand before these five men and ask their permission to whisk away their most prized jewel.

“If you are going to ask us for permission to marry Anastasia, you have come to the wrong place.”

It was young Augustus, only one year older than Anastasia, who had spoken up.

“Pardon?” Benedict squeaked.

“You would like our sister’s hand in marriage,” Augustus stated.

“How did you know?” Benedict gasped.

“It is obvious,” the younger man laughed. “You have gathered nearly the entire family, excluding the one you favor. You have been relentlessly pacing in front of us for nearly fifteen minutes, trying to figure out how exactly to ask. But you are in the wrong place.”

“I- I do not understand,” Benedict stuttered.

“We know better than to answer for our sister,” Andrew scoffed. “She was raised with only us around. Surely you are not foolish enough to think she should be confined to our opinions when she has so many of her own.”

In hindsight, Benedict knew he was right. It was foolish of him to think that he needed their permission to marry her.

“Mr. Bridgerton,” Lord Mackenzie said, rising from his chair. “Our permission is not necessary for your marriage. If Anastasia wishes to marry you, she will. And we will support her in all of her endeavors.”

“Does… Does that mean I have your blessing?” Benedict whispered.

“You certainly have mine,” Lord Mackenzie said before turning to his sons. “And I would think you four foolish to disagree.”

The young men agreed and with a gracious thank you, Benedict was off to tell his mother of the wonderful plan he had.

By the next afternoon, Benedict had everything planned out. On the coming Friday, he would promenade with her, take her riding, have a romantic picnic, and end the evening with a dinner at which he would stand up in front of their families and confess his love.

Every detail was planned, and yet he never reached that day.

The day never came because the evening after Benedict asked the Mackenzies for their permission to marry Anastasia, the pair were out for another late adventure. However, instead of walking to Mr. Granville’s studio, they simply had a picnic under the stars in the Bridgerton garden.

“I wonder what it’s like up there,” Anastasia mused as she stared at the sky.

“Dark, I would presume,” Benedict quipped. “Dark and very, very cold.”

“What do you think they’re made of?” she asked, ignoring his tease.

“Light.”

She swiveled her head toward him. “Can you be serious for one moment?”

He sighed and scooted closer to her, peering up at the sky above him. “I think it would be beautiful up there. You would be able to see every single aspect of our world without being completely immersed in our society. It would be so quiet, so peaceful. As for the stars…”

He turned his face toward her, studying her features.

“As for the stars, Ana, I would think you should know what they are made of.”

She furrowed her eyebrows. “What are you saying?”

“I believe they are made of every beautiful aspect of life. Kindness, strength, grace. Every star has the courage to shine and give us light in the dark, but the mercy to not obliterate us with one look.”

She hung on his every word, silently begging for him to continue.

“I would think you should know what they are made of, because I see the very same characteristics in you. In fact, I believe I see a bit of stardust hanging in your eyes,” he smiled, tipping her chin up with his fingers.

Despite her racing heart and baited breath, she teased, “Do you say that to all the girls you flirt with?”

“Only the ones whose first names begin with A and surnames begin with M,” he hummed.

She smirked. “I suppose Amelia Mayberry swooned as well, then.”

“That is not fair,” he objected. “I don’t know anyone who would say those words to Amelia Mayberry.”

Anastasia laughed and shook her head. “You are too much, Mr. Bridgerton.”

Before he could say another word, she stood from their blanket and slipped off her shoes.

“Have you ever felt wet grass beneath your toes?” she asked.

“Not since I was a child,” he hummed.

“Come,” she said, offering her hand. “Dance with me.”

Once he had taken off his shoes and rolled the bottom of his trousers up, Benedict stood and took her waiting hand. Anastasia laced their fingers and pulled him into the dew-covered grass. The sound of her melodic laughter echoed through the garden as they swung each other around.

“A jig!” she giggled.

The pair lost track of time as they danced. They only stopped when Anastasia lost her balance on a particularly slippery patch of grass and stumbled into Benedict, sending them both flying to the ground.

“You clumsy girl!” he teased, body shaking with laughter.

Once they had both calmed down and caught their breath, they fell into silence as they realized just how close their bodies were. Anastasia had landed with half of her body on the ground and half of it on Benedict’s shoulder. Their faces were inches apart, forcing them to share a breath.

“I am quite the clumsy girl,” she murmured, peering at him through her eyelashes.

He stared up at her, mind and heart racing. Before he could get his thoughts in order, his mouth opened.

“Marry me.”

They were both taken aback by his words, but he quickly relaxed. There was nothing in his life that felt more perfect than that moment. In that one single second, everything made sense.

“Ben,” she whispered as he sat up and forced her with him.

“You said I should propose when I felt the time was right,” he breathed. “And I feel the time is absolutely impeccable.”

“It is the middle of the night,” she laughed dryly. “Only you would pick the strangest time to ask for my hand in marriage.”

“Ana, when my mother speaks of my late father, she always says that he was her perfect love match. I used to think those didn’t exist. Surely it was not possible for two people to be made for one another,” he said, cutting himself off with a deep breath. “Until I met you.”

She softened, near tears already.

“I want to-” He dug around in the pocket of his trousers before pulling his hand out. “I wanted to give you this.”

He opened his hand, palm up, to reveal a dainty ring. The band was silver and the flower’s petals were made out of shining blue stones.

“Oh my god,” she gasped.

“It was my mother’s. My father gave it to her a very long time ago. She wishes for each of her sons to bestow one of her rings on their wives, as a sort of heirloom. I have chosen this one,” he explained. “The blue symbolizes fidelity and loyalty, which she believes are some of the most important aspects of a true match.”

He took another deep breath.

“Anastasia, I love you. I have always had a soft spot for you, even when you were a child. The older we got and the closer we grew, I realized that it was the beginnings of love. And now that I have spent all this time with you…” he trailed. “I was absolutely devastated when I heard of your engagement to Lord Weston. I thought I would never have the privilege of loving you wholly, openly, for the world to see. When you returned to London, I knew I could not let you slip through my fingers again. So, if you’ll have me, I would like you to wear this ring and be my wife.”

His words hung in the air around them, thick and weighing. He almost began to regret them as he received no reaction from his beloved.

But then, as if the stars above them had aligned, a bright smile curled onto her lips, lighting up her features.

“Of course I will have you,” she whispered, taking his face in her hands.

“You will?” he gasped.

“Of course I will,” she breathed. “I love you.”

He jumped up and pulled her with him, immediately wrapping his arms around her in the tightest hug he could muster.

“I love you,” he whispered into her hair. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

She laughed as his breath tickled her skin. “I love you too.”

He pulled away and slid the ring on her finger, his hands shaking with nervousness.

“It’s the perfect fit,” she whispered, tilting her hand back and forth to watch the tiny petals glimmer in the moonlight.

“It is meant to be.”

-o-o-o-o-o-

does anyone read these notes? idk, it’s fine. roughly edited, y’all already know. it’s been a few days bc i’ve been swamped with work (8 days straight babyyyyyy). as i said before, this will be the final formal part with the epilogue coming soon and perhaps the bonus part with eloise simply bc i think it’s really funny (no one appreciates my funniness). have a good day/night my dears!

[ditch-witches]

Insufferable (i) - George MacKay x reader

(PART 2) (PART 3) (PART 4)

requested: yes/no (im so sorry this took so long holy scheisse, there are so many parts too)

Thank you so much to our first Instagram request! @/okay.l0z I had a lot of fun with this and had to channel Ryan and Hannah's angst to help me.

"Hi! I've been reading your fics and I love them so much bc there's hardly any around. I was wondering if you take insta requests and if so can you do one with George and the reader are like enemies to loves and they have really cute moments but then end up fighting all the time and then it escalates and they end up having sEx and then get together or something bc I will THRIVE IF YOU DO!" ... "Is it bad if I want it long ass?"

also I thought about this like,,, a lot,,,

pairing: George MacKay x reader

warnings: slow-burn introduction bAsIcalLy, I think there are swear words?

word count: 2,629

a/n: There are several things to be addressed...

accuracy to George's life is like 0/100 - scratch that, they have the same hair color

think of this as an AU because idk how else to explain it

it's a slow burn. if you need something that isn't, check the next imagine over and give it a reblog.

You put your chin in your hand and furrowed your brows as you listened to the actors in front of you. The bright stage lights kept you at a suffocatingly hot temperature, but at this point, you didn't mind. What your main concern for the scene was simple: your leading actor was George MacKay. You had spent constant, stressful hours trying to convince the director of the show that he was not the choice, yet when it came down to it, what he said went, and you had to deal with the cleaning up. Today was not like any other. An almost two-hour practice, script work, lighting, etc, were all thrown at the actors still attempting to memorize their lines.

But it was this part, in particular, that was becoming the most difficult. Maybe it was because you were the ghostwriter of the script and the director was trampling on all of your ideas and dreams with a man that you could one-hundred-percent deem an enemy. Your lead character, Charlie, had a soft side to him, despite having an overpowering sense of the dangers of the world and a body to match. George wasn't Charlie. George was one of the lost boys from Peter Pan and that's all you could see him as. He needed to grow up and be a pirate with only two motives: breaking the chains of the dystopian government regime keeping him away from his wife and captaining the deadly sea creature infested waters and getting back to his wife in one piece.

But George's motives seemed to be entirely set on getting into his co-star's pants.

His cocky attitude and facade of charm made you want to rip your hair out. Sure, he took his job seriously and had several esteemed colleagues of yours raving about him, but this role wasn't his. It didn't help that you knew him from primary school, of all places, and once he found out, that's all he could bring up around you.

George rolled his sleeves and dragged a hand through his thick, red hair, the veins in his arm becoming rather predominant as he did so. He was damn near playing footsie with the girl in front of him; their flirty gazes bouncing from each other to the crumpled scripts in their hands. You rolled your eyes, feeling as if your team could see the steam rolling off your shoulders. The director was doing nothing, merely smiling giddily at the two tearing the scene to shreds. "Stop," you took the reins, standing up from your position on stage and tossing your script down. You stepped over to the two and the director didn't move an inch. "What are you doing?" You nipped, crossing your arms and stepping between George and his co-star.

He towered over you by miles; you weren't sure if this made him feel the superiority he exuded, but you always made sure to square your shoulders when you talked to him. "What do you mean? We're practicing," he slyly stated, sending a wink over your head to the girl.

You took the script from his hands, flipping a few pages to the scene they were supposed to be working on. He smirked down at you, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he watched you scan the page. His script was well-loved and worn as if it had been in his back pocket repeatedly, flipped through, folded, torn and taped, highlighted and annotated. You tried not to blush at the notes he had taken as if he had actually cared about his role. Notes such as movements and relative emotions were noted as if they were suggestions. You wet your lips, feeling George's easy-going gaze on you the whole time. "... Charlie, we have to get out of here..." You began, your eyes meeting his deep blue ones.

His face fell into a stern expression, his arms crossing heavily with a furrowed brow. "We've only just got here. I'm shipping out tomorrow. There's no way the Republic-" His Scottish accent was surprisingly thick and consistent. He was settling into Charlie.

"I don't care anymore. I'm tired of sitting idly by and watching you throw yourself away for a debt your brother can't repay." You swore you saw an actual feeling of hurt flash behind his eyes.

He chewed the inside of his cheek. "That debt is just as much mine as it is his. You're asking me to uproot and leave him, you know? I can't leave him."

"You'll die. You'll end up like the rest of the mariners haunting their wives for the rest of eternity. You're a slave." George took a few steps to stand in front of you, he was close enough that you could smell his cologne now: a sweet mix of sandalwood with hints of lavender. He smelled like a summer day spent at a cabin in the middle of a meadow. You hated it, but you wanted to bury yourself in his chest and bask in his scent for the remainder of your days.

He rested a hand on your neck, angling your face towards him as he whispered, "Look at me..." You attempted to ignore the beating of your heart in your ears and the sweat that began to spread across your back. "I'm free. I'm choosing this debt because, without it, he would die. He's the last piece of my father I have left."

You reached for his hand, covering it with your own. "What about me, Charlie? I'm here now. I'm flesh and blood in front of you. What about our child?"

"He'll be here when I get back." He pushed away from you, turning his back on you and settling his hands on his hips. "I'm not changing my mind." He looked over his shoulder at you. "Eden, I have to do this." You closed the script with a raised eyebrow, hiding how impressed you were that he actually knew his lines. The emotion he was conveying was nothing like how he had previously let on. You walked towards him and he turned back around. You pressed the script back into his hands and gave him a small glare.

"Practice how you play. I'm done with wasting time," you said more to the group than just him. The rest of the cast members weren't as proficient in hiding their amusement back as you were. The last thing George needed was another inflate to his ego. You went back to your spot, grabbing your clipboard and flipping over a few pages. The group began to gather around you slightly. "I need Eden and Charlie in with wardrobe now, the rest of you keep practicing your lines. I'll want to hear dialogue from Dane and Jack tomorrow. Give me another forty or so minutes and we'll call it?" The director nodded from the first row of seats. The crowd dispersed but George swam against the current of thespians, approaching you again.

He gave you one of his charming smiles. Be professional, you thought. "I was just wondering how that sounded to you?"

You thought for a moment, drawing the clipboard to your chest. "Yeah, it was good. Your accent's a bit dodgy, but the emotion is good. Why don't we see that during actual rehearsals?" You tilted your head at him and he looked at his shoes slightly, tucking his hands in the pockets of his jeans. Was he pretending to be humble?

"I don't know. I guess I like you more as Eden," he jeered, causing you to roll your eyes and he smiled wider.

"You're insufferable," you muttered, walking past him.

He chuckled. "Don't worry, I'll grow on you."

You scoffed slightly. "Go get fitted for suspenders and leave me alone, MacKay."

The next few days were full of constant rehearsals both in costume and script memorization. You had to admit that for some reason this show had you wrapped in a bundle of tension and anxiety. George slowly tore away at your nerves, becoming his own mess of anger and frustration as he picked up more and more on the fact that you weren't going to take his shit. You were serious about this job and you were serious about this play. His humor had diminished as it had gotten closer and closer to opening night and you weren't surprised when he would snap back at you for making an adjustment to his tone or a note on the delivery of a line.

"Stop being such a bitch!" He groaned, tugging at his hair as you crossed your arms.

"Calm down, primadonna! All I'm saying is quit pacing! Charlie isn't pacing! Where in the script does it say he's pacing-"

"THAT'S RIDICULOUS. IT DOESN'T MATTER." He moved to stand in front of you, his teeth gritting slightly. This was what your discussion had grown into, one hissy fit flaring up the other.

"FUCK, YOU'RE RIGHT. I TOTALLY FORGOT YOU WERE THE ONE IN CHARGE, MR. MACKAY. SHOULD I JUST SUCK YOUR DICK RIGHT NOW SINCE WE'RE ALREADY ADDING IN UNNECESSARY ACTION," you would bite back causing him to glare up at the ceiling with his jaw clenching in a sarcastic smile. He wore your patience thinner than tulle. And you were hoping to be doing the same to him.

On the eve of opening night, a storm broke out over the city. You hadn't received word from your ride at all---a man you had been seeing on and off for a while, but still managed to keep him at enough distance that the two of you weren't official. You glared at your watch, deciding to say fuck it and just walk the five or so miles it was to your apartment. Your rain jacket was already soaked, your umbrella proving to be no help whatsoever. But you persevered knowing full-well that if your character, Eden, were in the situation, she wouldn't have batted an eye before dropping him and his lack of communication. As the water soaked into your boots and chilled you rather quickly, you bit your tongue, regretting not waiting for the bus. Cars past you at rushed paces, wanting to get home to their loved ones if the rain worsened---you figured.

Your heart began to pound as a car pulled up beside you, causing you to wrap your hand around the bottle of mace in your coat pocket. The window rolled down, but you kept walking. "Do you need a ride?" Hollered an almost too familiar voice.

You crossed your arms and continued to walk. "No!" You called back.

The car rolled forward and you heard the driver door open. George stepped out slightly, drawing his jacket up to fight against the biting wind. "Come on! Look at this weather!"

"I'm good! Go home, George!"

He tilted his head at you with a deadpan expression. "Don't make me throw you over my shoulder." You furrowed your brows and rolled your eyes, sliding into the passenger seat of his car and taking down your hood. George watched as you did this. He slipped off his jacket. "Here." He pulled his hoodie over his head. "Take your shirt off. You'll get hypothermia."

"Excuse me?" You nipped.

It was his turn to roll his eyes. "I won't look. You're soaked. Take my damn hoodie." You looked out the front window and then let out a huff. You peeled off your upper layer, no longer giving a fuck if George saw you in your bra. You looked over to him while he leaned his arm against his door, his cheek resting against his fist as he held his hoodie out to you. You pulled the garment over your head and couldn't help but snuggle into it. It was oversized and warm, smelling just like George. Your cold skin seemed to sigh against the soft material and you felt tears prickling at the corners of your eyes at how content you were. George put the car into drive after he had made sure you were taken care of. You slipped your hands into the long sleeves and fought not to dig your nose into the neckline to breathe him in. His scent was like kryptonite to you and you hated it. "Are you hungry?" He asked, looking at you briefly and flipping the heat more to your side. He smiled almost proudly to himself at the sight of you enjoying his hoodie and the safety of his car.

You quickly braided your hair, attempting to combat the wet feeling of it against your neck. "No, I'm fine thanks."

"Come on. My treat? I've been a dick to you all week."

"Fine..." You mumbled. He found a nook of a restaurant jabbed into a part of London you had yet to explore. The rain had finally let up to a drizzle as the two of you made your way inside the softly lit eatery. The two of you tucked into a booth and ordered almost instantly, you now realizing just how hungry you actually were. "What were you doing in that part of town so late?" You finally asked after they brought out a hot tea for him and topped off your coffee. His large hands cradled the steaming mug in front of him, his nose slightly red from the chilly weather outside.

He chuckled slightly. "I forgot my script in the theatre and---for some reason---couldn't stop thinking about it." You nodded hesitantly. "Why were you walking home?"

You shrugged nonchalantly. "Such beautiful weather we're having. Thought I would take an evening stroll," you joked, causing him to chuckle lightly. George's face seemed to glow slightly under the cozy lights of the restaurant, his hair slightly disheveled and damp from the rain. You now got a full sight of the t-shirt he was wearing that commemorated a football team from the graduating year ahead of yours.

There was a beat of silence between you two. "Why..." George tugged his bottom lip between his teeth, attempting to find the right words. You furrowed your brows. "Why do you hate me so much?" If you weren't looking at him, you would have sworn he was smiling behind his question.

"Seriously?"

He nodded. "Seriously."

"You dated my best friend, Sophie, and broke her heart," you answered bluntly.

George sent you a puzzled expression for half a second before grinning slightly. "Yeah, but I was ten."

"Yeah, but now she's twenty-one and we still talk about it," you quipped, taking a sip of your coffee.

He exhaled. "I was... I was ten..." He furrowed his brows. "She was pretty. Hasn't some other guy broken up with her since me?"

You shrugged again. "No, she has this mindset where if she starts getting the feeling that things aren't working, she cuts out."

"She's been dwelling over me for how many years?" He couldn't fight the grin threatening to creep across his face.

You bit the inside of your cheek in thought. "I guess that would be twelve years." He whistled. "We're good at keeping grudges."

"Well, if I ever run into her, I'll apologize." He added a lump of sugar to his tea. "Is that the only reason?"

You debated ripping him a new one, but the tiredness you felt reflected in his eyes. "It's the kick-off point. Why? Do you wanna be buddies now?" You joked, sticking your spoon in your mouth.

He rested his hand in his chin. "Nah," he pursed his lips in thought. You furrowed your eyebrows at his answer, letting a titter escape your lips. "You're too young for me." You laughed a bit harder.

"Age is just a number, baby," you hummed and he smirked at you, a sparkle in his eye.

Comment if you would like to be tagged in the next part! Let us know what you think!

[horanimal-10]

Okay, I know we still have the final to go, but given what we've seen so far what's everyone thinking about the Olympic roster? Who you think deserves to make it, who you want to make it, who is a definite no at this point, anything. Now, I basically know jack shit about soccer (I was a field hockey player, oops) but I definitely have some thoughts about who I want/think deserves to make it. 

Let's start with the front line, shall we? 

Christen Press. I mean, this one is obvious. In what universe does CP *not* make the roster? I'll tell you which universe - none. She's clearly having a moment, she's healthy, everyone loves her. She's in, signed, sealed, delivered. Put it on my grave.

Pinoe. Okay, okay, "she's only good on set pieces" people say. Yeah, and those are pretty important. And aside from last night's somewhat sub-par performance in that department, I think she's looked pretty damn good this tournament. Fit af. Plus there is something to be said for the leadership and experience the older players have to offer. I think the rest of the team respects her and values her, and she's super positive and supportive of everyone, which I love. As long as she stays healthy, she's in.

Heath. Whoo. Honestly, I don't think we got a good look at her, what with her limited minutes. But she's the nutmeg queen, she's great on corners, she's spicy, and she does that nifty little backheel thing. And again - experience. Definitely takes on a mentor role with some of the younger players. She's had some injuries going back to the end of the club season, but as far as I know they've been minor. I still cringe every time she gets fouled, but I think she'll be okay as long as Vlatko continues to be smart about managing her minutes until she's 100%.

AMorgs??? Okay, this one's loaded. I give her major props for continuing her training during pregnancy, and I 100% believe she has the drive to be match fit by July. That said, pregnancy and childbirth are unpredictable. If she ends up needing a c section (which I wish on nobody, fingers crossed for a nice, uncomplicated delivery) I don't think she'll be ready due to the recovery period. That is the only reason I hesitate to say she's going for sure but I am hoping for the best and want only good things for her.

Baby Mal??? I don't know. This is a tough one. As much as I miss her, I will admit to thinking (please don't kill me for this) that she looked kind of lost and unfocused in the friendlies last fall. She has the skills to be there, no doubt, it just seemed to me she wasn't connecting well with her teammates, wasn't anticipating where they would be, etc. But I love her and hope she works shit out.

Carlos??? She isn't starter material at this point. This tournament, for her, seemed to be about getting Carlos to the Olympics, not the USWNT. Not at her best, by a long shot, and unlike Pinoe I don't think the younger players really see her as a leader or mentor. Not gonna lie, I was rooting for her because I admire her drive and dedication to keep going, but she fell short here.

Now, I'm skipping ahead to goalies, because honestly that's the easiest.

Uncle Naeher. Biggest no-brainer along with Press. (Honestly...can anyone give me a valid reason for her not to start? I doubt it.) I think she proved both in international and club play last season that she deserves the starting spot. It's hers to lose, but she won't.

Ashlyn. I hesitate to say I'm 100% sure here, but it's a pretty good bet. Campbell or Bledsoe could sneak in there, but at this point I'm leaning towards not. We really didn't get a good look at where she is right now, what with there not being a whole lot of action on that end of the field, but apparently Vlatko likes her so I'm good with that.

Ugh. Now we have midfield and backs. Honestly the toughest spots to cut anyone because they're basically all looking rock solid. 

Rose. Why tf would you cut Rose? That's right, you wouldn't. She's had a solid tournament. Would have liked to see more of her, but benching her against Costa Rica was prob a good call, given her yellow card from the previous game. (Confession - sometimes I feel like she falls in the "looks like she could kill you; would actually kill you" category. Anyone else get this vibe? Not necessarily a bad thing…)

Lindsey. Honestly, I feel like sometimes she doesn't get the credit she deserves. Does she ever have a *bad* game? Even when she's not at her best, she's still The Pretty Good Horan. Solid as a rock. Great one-touch passes. Has perfected the art of the header. Awesome volleys. Just got her first international hat trick, yay! Looks cool, calm, and collected, but is capable of being absolute chaos on main (exhibit A: That Game™ vs Utah). Leaves no square inch untouched as she roams from box to box. Minus last season's concussion (and maybe a minor hamstring injury last fall where she missed a friendly? Am I right?) she's been healthy, which is more than I can say for several others, so there's also that. And she's the love of my life, so I will accept zero criticism on this one.

JJ. She's fast, she's feisty (and sometimes ultra spicy), she and Dunn are adorable bffs, she's a leader. I have nothing bad to say about her. But I'm still kinda salty that Chicago beat Portland in the semis so that's as nice as I'm gonna get. (No hate though, really, she's fantastic.) She needs to stop giving me heart attacks with the couple-pics-that-could-be-pregnancy-announcements, though. One USWNT baby at a time, thanks.

Sammy. Well, she got herself two braces so far in qualifying (okay, that one goal was highly questionable, but the ref said goal so goal it is), so she's definitely made a strong case for herself. She's tall. She's able and willing to catch The Great Horan (you know, because she's the only one taller than The Great Horan). She panics over being the first one on the bus. The only thing I don't like about her? She plays for NCC. But honestly she's adorable, really fucking good, and I love her so I can overlook that.

KO. Okay, I'll admit I was nervous. Her first couple games were a little shaky, she had a few pretty big goof-ups (but I mean when she whiffed that one time she had literally just recovered from a savage attempt at breaking her ankles so I can't even blame her for that) but her ankles were away at war for like 6 months so what do you expect? Last night she was in fine form. She brings a great energy to the game, connects well with Tobito, has the Stanny connection with CP and some cute, newfound friendship thing going on with Horan, and is basically the ultimate hype girl (when she's not being the ultimate frat daddy). When you need a bitch, she's your woman. And she's hot. Like, HOT hot. As long as the ankles hold up, she's gotta be on that roster. I am rooting for those ankles. Hard.

Sonnett. Really did herself a solid with the minutes she had. No complaints from me. Almost scored a goal, and I'm not counting it out in the final. Not afraid to break ankles. She's scrappy, spicy, saucy, a sit-down comedian, a soft smiler, and a package deal with Horan. She deserves the world. The world (or at least the USWNT and its fans) deserves her. Please don't cut her, Vlatko. I beg of you. (I'm not saying if you cut her, I'll cut you, but like...I'm not NOT saying it, either...)

Krieger. What do I need to say except she showed everyone why Jello was an idiot not to play her. She's a beast. And I really, really, really need the wives to both make it bc I will cry if one does and the other doesn't.

Dunn. I mean, have you seen her? She's all over the field. She almost scored during her 100th cap. I've never seen her have a bad game. Voted best dancer on the team. The only problem? See Sammy above. F'n NCC. She deserves better, dammit.

Dahlkemper. Okay, don't sue me, but I really don't have any feelings toward her either way. A lot of people love her. I've never heard anyone say anything bad about her (except this one time I saw someone roast her on IG for following Honkle, but that's her business I guess) so that's good enough for me. Also she's pretty and posts thirsty comments on her teammates pics so basically I stan a supportive Abby.

Broon. Cool as a cucumber. The voice of reason. A literal angel. Captain Becky never lets us down.

Okay. Now for who I don't think will/should make it. 

AD. This makes me really, really sad. I love AD. But she's the only player on the roster who didn't get any minutes, so I think that says exactly where she stands in Vlatko's eyes. It's a shame, because she's amazing, but it's super hard to choose between her and Ash.

Lynn. Clearly Vlatko sees something in her, and tried really hard to make it happen. It didn't happen. I was kind of rooting for her, just because everyone else seemed to be against her, but she just didn't seem to connect with the rest of the team. She's fast, I'll give her that, but it's not enough. 

Jmac. Another one I was rooting for just because everyone else was against her. She has talent, and when she's on she's great, but she wasn't connecting with the others. 

Moe. Nothing against her, just no compelling reason to cut anyone else for her. Injury-prone, which obviously isn't good.

Allie. See Moe, minus the injuries. Bonus points for social media content, though.

Baby T. No clue where she stands with the injury. If she's 100% I have absolutely no reason why she shouldn't be on the team, but I don't know who I'd cut to keep her. If she isn't 100% I'd rather she take the time to heal completely. I know it was reported that she'd be ready to resume training around February, but a while back she herself said she didn't think she'd be 100% by the Olympics so who tf knows. She's SO young and could have 2-3 Olympics (and World Cups) ahead of her so no need to risk a career-ending injury by rushing it. But if she IS ready I'm down for her being an alternate (or, heaven forbid, making roster in the event that anyone else is injured). I like Tierna. I want a long, successful career and only good things for her.

Player I selfishly just want on the team because I like her.

Midge. She was a Thorn, so maybe I'm a little biased, but she's good, she's young (but not *young* young and inexperienced), she's versatile. I like her. A lot. 

Okay, that's all I got. Let me know what y'all think.

[emilyutonium]

Dads in Charge

A Preview of the first part of my short story! ;) It’s about the boys having to take care of all their superpowered children while their wives are on vacation. It can by read on Wattpad, Archiveofourown.org and fanfiction.net under the username 3mi1y02. Enjoy!

---

The green puff bounced on top of her uniformly colored suitcase, struggling to fit all of her clothes as her husband laughed, laying on the bed beside her. She glared playfully, "Don't laugh, fucker. Help me."

"Shouldn't this have been done days ago?" He questioned, lazily getting up to help push the dark-toned tops and bottoms into the case. "Plus don't you think they would fit if you, I don't know, actually folded them?"

Buttercup gave him a weird glance before muttering, "Ew, extra work." to which he gave a polite chuckle.

She pursed her lips, "And yes but we're not gonna let Leader girl know that or she'll have my head. Besides I forget things when I don't pack last minute and I would have an even bigger problem with my other sister if I forgot our matching Powerpuff swimsuits."

"Mmm, wifey in a bikini?" Butch shut his eyes dreamingly, opening them again in a manner that resembled a pleading dog. "Please make sure I can get a picture of that beautiful sight before anyone else can?"

"You wish." She chuckled, not exactly denying her husband of that pleasure herself but reminding him of her younger sister. "Bubbles will have taken enough selfies and posted them before I can say 'Wait lemme pick up my privacy first'. That girl takes blogging to a new level." Buttercup finally giving up trying to zip the suitcase up all the way before she broke it, opted to just tell Blossom that she needed a bigger suitcase.

"Shame. Just another reason why your amazing hubby should be coming with you." Butch sighed, pulling her by the waist to stand between his legs on the edge of the bed. "Y'know we'd have a lot of good old fashioned fun down there."

"The whole point of the trip is to be just with the girls, Butch." She teased, knowing full well she wouldn't mind bringing him with her to a relaxing private island. It could've been like their actual honeymoon.

"I know but you could stash me in your suitcase like a-"

"Butch, my suitcase can barely fit the few clothes I even wanna bring. What makes you think I could fit you too- Bear? Hold on a minute." The 25-year-old mother turned towards the open doorway, where their son stood frozen. His back turned away from his parents as he tried to sneak past.

The 5-year-old turned slowly, grinning wide and facing his mother, said, "Yes, momma?" in the sweetest most innocent voice he could muster.

"What do you have in your hand?" Buttercup challenged, assuming an authoritarian stance that she had learned from Blossom. Legs spread. Hands on hips. Face stern.

"Ooo, you in trouble now baby Bear." Butch snickered at his son from behind Buttercup to which she reminded herself to punch him for later.

"What? Nothing momma..." The little boy lied before seeing his mother's disbelief stricken face. "Just this knife." He pulled a small needle-pointed knife from behind him.

"What is your obsession with knives lately? Give it." He obeyed. "Now go play with regular kid things like a damn baseball or something."

"Yes momma..." He muttered, hanging his head.

"That's my boy!" Butch called after his son as the door to the room closed.

"Where'd he even get this?" Buttercup's voice rang through the wood as Bear walked down the hallway, concentrating his hands together before a small dagger formed in his hands. He smiled and ran down the steps passing his red-haired uncle and aunt in the kitchen.

===

"Bear! No playing with knives, we need them and you could break something!" Blossom hollered.

"Ok Auntie red!" He responded, not even attempting to pretend as if he would listen and Blossom sighed. She loved her little nieces and nephews, she really did, but cripes did they ever listen? It only worried her how the boys would survive with all 6 of them by themselves.

"Ugh anyway, The twin's blankets?"

"Check." Brick noted, allowing Bailey, his 3-month-old, to grab at his beard. His super strength hadn't kicked in yet so Brick didn't mind. But it was possible that he probably wouldn't ever mind.

"How about Bailey's pacifier?" She asked, attempting to pace around the kitchen island while her 4-year-old son Bernard held her leg, following her everywhere she went. "Oh Bern honey, Mommy's not going anywhere. You can go play." The little boy shook his head and his mother sighed in defeat. She couldn't imagine what he'd do when she actually did have to leave for this vacation.

"He's got it right here." Brick said holding the baby out in front of him for his wife to see the cherry tinted pacifier between his lips. She smiled as Bailey giggled seeing his mother and kissed his forehead.

"Ok...packs of diapers?" Blossom quizzed, looking over the list in her hand.

"Check."

"How many? BC told me little Butterfly still hasn't gotten a hand of potty training so you'd need extras just in case." Blossom pointed out. "I'd hate to be all the way in Bora Bora when you all run out of diapers and face an accident of some sort-"

"Which is why I had Boomer go out and get 4 more packs. Something I can get him to do again if we do run out." Brick countered, knowing how anxious and worried his wife could get and was getting.

"Great, but what about-"

"Bloss, we'll be fine I promise you. We're all adults, parents even. 3 grown adults in charge while you three are gone. you don't have anything to be worried about, seriously." Brick reasoned, admiring Bailey as he attempted to eat his old man's sausage fingers.

"Yea but with 6 kids Brick? And you know Butch and Boomer can sometimes slip into man-children every now and then. I don't want you to have to be in charge of all 8 of them!"

"Ok, You got me there, babe. Last week I walked in on Boomer laying on Bubbles like he was her second child. Didn't even know where poor Bambi was." The red-eyed ruff cackled lazily. "But still, I'm here to keep them in check. I mean I've been doing it for what? 25 years now? You know I can handle it. Don't worry."

"I know, I just..." She trailed off, pulling Bailey's curls away from his chubby face. "I don't want anything to go wrong while I'm not- I mean.." She stopped looking down at Bern, who was watching her closely with his thumb firmly in his mouth. "I mean while I'm here cause I won't be going anywhere."

Brick rolled his crimson eyes as Boomer walked into the large kitchen, opening up the fridge for an off brand soda, "Hey little buddy, why don't you go watch some tv with your cousins in the playroom? Bambi told me Frozen 2 is really good, maybe even better than the first movie." The little boy shook his head silently, holding on to Blossom's pant leg tightly.

"Aw, why not? It'll be fun besides you can't stick by your mom forever."

"Nooo, mommy nah going anywhere." Bern spoke softly but firmly as if he knew for certain his mother would actually stay by him forever. Poor boy.

"It's ok Boom, we stopped trying." Brick sighed, Bailey now taking a liking to the tattoos that lined his skin.

"Well, it's gonna be really hard for us to calm him down after you lea- OW!" He yelped and rubbed an already fading burn mark on his arm. "I mean...right. You're not leaving to go anywhere. I don't know what I was thinking."

Blossom rolled her eyes, "C'mon Bern honey let's go recount the boxes of snacks that Brielle isn't allowed to eat." She strolled out of the kitchen and towards the garage, Bern holding her hand tightly as they passed his blue-eyed Aunt.

"Why hello, Bernie." He waved bashfully. "Bloss, do you have all your bags ready? I caught Buttercup upstairs trying to finish packing."

"Of course she was but yes, they're in the car. Ready as soon as I can find a way to get away from this one." She whispered the last part at a decimal that only Bubbles could hear and she nodded.

"Ah, gotcha. Well, good luck!" She giggled, lightly floating into the kitchen area.

"Thanks, I'll need it."

===

"Hello boys, are you two ready to take on all the kids at once?" Bubbles grinned excitedly, no doubt the whole idea of this trip had been her planning.

"Of course we are suger. We're all experienced caretakers with wonderful daddy skills. I mean look at Daddy red over there with his 3rd child. He's practically a baby expert." Boomer boasted, jabbing his thumb towards Brick who was starting to pick up a not so pleasant smell from his son.

"We'll be fine, childproofed the whole house and got all the rooms basically set up. Now if you'll excuse me, this baby expert needs to change this one's diaper before it spills out onto his arm." Daddy red stood up, holding Bailey's bottom away from his canine nose as he flew upstairs.

"I just can't wait to get there, I've never been to Bora bora y' know?" The blonde sighed, setting herself onto the counter next to Boomer as she daydreamed.

"You have no idea how jealous I am of you right now angel. A relaxing island getaway sounds like so much more fun than taking care of 6 children with my brothers."

"Aw don't worry Boomie. I'm sure you all will have lots of fun. In fact, I think I'm the jealous one here."

"You? How? You'll be soaking up the sun with a tall drink and a handsome waiter named Alejandro serving your every need." He joked with a hint of jealousy in his tone towards the handsome make-believe waiter.

"But I'll be away from you. And Bambi." Bubbles added, shifting her gaze to the living room, where the TV was blasting while no one watched. "I mean she's only a year old I'm allowed to feel a little separation anxiety right? Like I feel like I always miss her even when I'm in the same area as her."

"Angel, you're allowed to feel any way you want. And I get you. I guess you're right. I'd hate to be away from not only you but Lady adorable as well. But that's the point of the whole trip, isn't it? To get away from everything?"

The blue puff nodded, thinking to herself, "Well before I do that then, I think I need one more hug or else the sadness of being away from her will be too much to bear."

"I'm sure that must be some kind of motherly bond type thing, no?"

"Probably. I just hope she isn't too upset when I'm gone. I read online that babies have no concept of time so when they see that their mother or father isn't around they don't know if they are coming back. Do you think Bambi would believe that? That I wouldn't be coming back for her? Oh Boomie, I don't want her to believe that I would ever leave her." Boomer saw that her eyes were starting to tear up and hoped that she, like Bern, wouldn't cry when the time came for the girls to leave.

"Angel- Bubbles of course not-" He tried to wrap his arms around her before she jumped down from the counter, determination glinted in her eyes. Or maybe that was the tears, Boomer couldn't tell anymore.

"Where is she?"

"Uh-what?"

"Wheres's Bambi? I need to spend as much time as possible with her and make her understand that her mother isn't going to abandon her."

"Uh um I think she's in the playroom?" Boomer muttered, realizing it had been a while since he'd actually seen his child.

Bubbles' blue eyes abruptly flickered from determination to fear. "What do you mean you think she's in the playroom?"

"I mean the last time I checked on her, she was in there chewing on one of Brielle's toys."

"Oh Blossom, bless her heart, she tries but we have no idea where Brielle could've been with those things! Bambi! Honey! I'm coming for you! Your mothers coming baby!" She took off towards the steps, Boomer barely being able to follow as he dodged an angry 3-year-old.

[dxntloseurhead]

SIX HIGHLIGHTS 11/09/2019 EDMONTON

these won't be completely in order bc ill think of different things as i go

also sorry this is late

- costumes!!! shoes!!! sparkly!!! - THERES A SELFIE WALL OUTSIDE THE THEATRE - oh my god the EYE CONTACT and the INTERACTION i was not prepared for that - that moment when you're in the theatre and you're sitting there and you realize oh my god this isn't a dream im actually right here - the stage was SO CLOSE oh my god the queens were literally right in front of us my gay heart couldn't handle it - i said this already but literally almost the entirety of ex wives (and later in the show but mainly ex wives) there was SO MUCH EYE CONTACT - "remember us from pbs?" - sam did a britney voice on “k-howard is here and the fun’s begun” and i,,,,, - sorry i don’t have much to say about no way other than it Slaps - andrea’s boleyn is the most Babey and i stand by that. - during dluh after "he doesn't wanna bang you, somebody hang you!" aragon stormed off to bessie and started complaining, and bessie just proceeded to shrug - literally in that moment bessie was the real version of the  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ emoji - “wait! what was i meant to do?” ACTUAL CUTIE ANDREA MACASAET EVERYONE - andrea does a voice that sounds like crytyping out loud on “i’m sorry not sorry ‘bout what i said” at the end of the second chorus - also “I’M NOT SORRY!” at the end,,, beautiful - MALLORY'S. PERFORMANCE. AS. SEYMOUR. I. NEARLY. CRIED. SHE'S SO GOOD. - howard looked so genuinely upset during the song like she was super affected by it - haus of holbein is hilarious live oh my god - THE LADIES IN WAITING DIDNT HAVE RUFFS(?) BUT THEY DID HAVE SUNGLASSES I- - sam adjusted her sunglasses downwards and looked over them at some point i don't remember exactly which line (i think it was "at least your complexion will bring all the boys in"?) and oh my GOD i wasn't ready - also sam sang the line “but we cannot guarantee that you’ll still walk at forty” and its like the only line in the song that isnt in a german accent. instead, she sounded like a stereotypical commercial saleswoman and it KILLED ME - oh!!! anna and sam respectively were the other possible matches before anna in the tinder parody portion - get down????????? even more of a bop - the length of the pause after “as he takes my fur”... it literally lasted like half a minute before they resumed the song and the audience kept cheering and laughing while the queens were like “?????????” - WHEN BRITT DID THE OPERA THING I KNEW IT WAS COMING BUT I WAS STILL SHOOK - she asked a group of three on the other side of the front row to dance and did they EVER (but then after she was like "this is MY song") - “so that’s one horse out of the race!” “rude.” - MALLORY’S BABY MARY BIT KILLED ME OH MY GOD IT WAS ACTUALLY SO FUNNY - “babes! who’s that again?” “uh, i think she was the least relevant catherine.” “ohhhh, i still don’t care.” - in her speech roasting the other queens before aywd, howard says "hot" instead of "fit" just in case you wanted to know! - speaking of that speech i l o v e d it so much - also “and surviving.” is directed to both cleves and parr - i knew aywd was intense but goddamn i wasn't ready i almost cried for a second time - during about the third chorus or so, howard started to look so tired and was less and less enthusiastic with the choreo - i knew about the pink light after the song but damn that hit hard also it looks cool as fuck - *long pause* “...and then i was beheaded.” - “i’m sorry, were you not listening to my song? there were four choruses. that’s how much sh- i had to deal with!” - the queens all talk over each other making fun of parr after the “i’m catherine parr and i draw the line in arbitrary places” line. - “i know, gold star for cathy parr.” - “yeah, tudor womanhood. would recommend!” - oh my god idnyl was sooooo good i love anna’s voice its so pretty - THE WAY SHE SANG “it’s what i have to do” OH MY G O D - also “darling get a clue!” - the entire “remember that i was a writer” part as well as the way she sings “we all disappear”... yes, just yes - late comment but i love anna’s parr hair, it’s not the usual parr hair and it looks so good on her - “okay, why does anyone know who we are?” “my sixth finger!” “put it away, babe.” - “we don’t know!” “catherine de valois- i mean we don’t know!” - “and get down like it’s 1499.” - “the dissolution of the monasteries, yes!” “no.” - such a long pause before the “fake competition” part just before the idnyl remix... - “awwww, we could’ve done that as a song!” - god their voices all just go together so well,,, - anna’s “WE DON’T NEED YOUR LOVE!” is so great - “edmonton, we have a voice!” *beat* “we said, we have a *riffs incredibly* VOICE!” - “his religious reforms?” “well actually-” “now’s not the time, catherine!” - the slow beginning of six is so pretty...... why didnt they do it like this on the album - “yeah! aragon, you wanna go first?” “well girl, i guess i could for a change” - the queens hyping up cleves before her verse has always been my favourite thing seriously it’s so cute - the way sam sang “and all i do is SIIIIING”,,,,,,,, i love her - the irony of “before we drop the curtain” considering the curtain literally gets pulled down at the beginning of the show - THE CONFETTI POP AT THE END OF SIX SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME BUT IT WAS AMAZING also i collected confetti off the floor after - still in love with how the LIW play the outro to six at the end of megasix - ANDREA!!! HUGGED!!! ME!!! we gave britt an envelope with bracelets for each of the queens and a letter and she took it to andrea after and later i went to get another picture (bc we missed getting a picture with andrea at first) and she was like "were you the one who gave us the envelope?? can i hug you??" I NEARLY CRIED - i got pictures with and signatures from all of the performing queens! my stepdad also got pictures with them as well as autographs on his jersey - god the show was so good and mallory seymour is AMAZING

okay that’s all i really have to say, there’s so much more but its hard to summarize an entire show in one post

[unsubstantiatedopinion]

Thinking about when I got my IUD. On the information trail of something else, saw a Quiz on a teen health site of which birth control is for you.

I had to work to get the answer I actually Use. Mind, the major change was "I am willing to go to a doc" and then it followed with the legit "I'm cool w my period getting heavier".

Mine started, and has settled back into being fairly light flow, long lasting, and like one day of cramps that are pretty easily managed.

But this quiz when I answers everything else,(thr first time, no clinic) offered me the Sponge on my list. Like yeah yeah condoms at the top of the list.

In 2016 on campus they were stocking both in the dorm bathrooms, external were more popular by a lot. But if you looked up success rates on Planned Parenthood, external had a higher efficacy rating. I figured that it was probably user error, but like, What? Then at a student health fair, I did ask the people at a sexual health table if they knew this, and if they knew why and they didn't. Though they also thought it was probably a familiarity w the device thing.

My sex Ed classes in 8th grade and HS did have us learn how to put a condom on a penis. (My 8th grade was taught by a lesbian and some outside person was brought in for part as well, but we did learn how to make a dam out of a condom as well. Didn't realize that was unusual knowledge.)

On the one hand, the external condom is the one birth control where the expectation is on the man to be dealing with it. And it has the wonderful qualities of being a in the moment sort of thing, very sweeping passionate much flirty. (And while *I* have never successfully done a seductive foreplay with a condom, there's some solid visual potential there.) And it is effective, one of the few things that is both birth control and STI control.

All that is wonderful.

The internal condom, by contrast, is a newer thing. So it hasn't come into the visual lexicon of "seeing this in the bedroom is normal". And tbh, popping it into place is harder to make into a teasing sensous thing. But i think there's more to it than that.

Unlike the other internal birth control methods. Even than the ring or what are some of those retro ones, sponge or diagphram. Once they are in place, they aren't Seen.

Most of the objects that are placed internally have a reputation of being for wives. Partially bc they are less effective(and the stakes of a pregnancy for a married woman are lower.) partially I think bc they are seen to 'break the mood', which you can get away with when you've seen intimately into the other's life, but when you are still in the dating sexy mystique phase culturally you aren't 'supposed to" do.

Which is also Bad.

If you do not feel like you could say to the other person, hey, can we pause or stop this? Don't fuck them.

But the modern methods of birth control, are mainly chemical (and not good vs STI) but their burden is entirely in the woman. Financially, emotionally, physically.

The optimistic version is that, this is women taking control of their bodies and lives.

But, 1. At what cost? And

2. So invisibly.

The unpopularity of the internal condom to me seems like a stroking of a man's ego. And falling into old hetero scripts.

Which is why I am using man and woman mainly here. Lesbians have less use for condoms generally (toys are washable, and gloves are better for hands). The accessabiltiy and flexibility of external condoms, makes them prefered for gay men. Sure the inner ring of an internal condom can be removed for anal sex, butt that is only one of many sex acts avalible to men outside of fanfiction.

But the Straight(tm) script has man pursue woman be innocent. And if she's not innocent, play innocent; otherwise this isn't a date on the good girls path to wedding. Basically if the woman is shown to be experienced it is mark against her, or specifically for the man's enjoyment. (See history of sex work, succubi as a concept, kink, and/or MILFs).

The pill, and even nexplenon or and IUD, are hidden. Sure they are pre-planned taking ones own reigns, but they aren't visible where the action is. (And the pill is way more popular anyhow, and has plausible deniability-its not cause I'm a slut it's for my cramps. Which is a legit use, but is not the Only reason it should be allowed). They also have that 'ready and avalible at any time' quality. Which, could be - unkindly- seen as making The Sex ready for the picking at any time.

By contrast, the internal condom can be a statment, it's a statment that at some point the woman said to herself, "I plan on getting Laid tonight". Probably when getting dressed and choosing a matching set of underwear. But unlike coordinated sets, its something that really is for her, and her protection. (Yes it's possible she is carrying an infection and doesn't want to pass it along.)

It's incredibly loud and enthusiastic consent.

Which, is not the Straight(tm) prefered narritive.

Obviously, it is the Best version of events. But consent is a whole other post.

The main reason I don't go for it myself, besides Covid, is the they are harder to find, more expensive and so it feels more like a waste of money if you don't fuck. And I haven't gone on many dinner dates that might lead to a rendezvous. And wouldn't want that nagging push. (on the other hand, totally see how this pressure is bad on men in Straight(tm) narritive. There lots of transaction happening in any relationship and we really don't think actively enough about it's influence as a culture).

In personal experience, the #1 reason I didn't want hormonal birth control was lack of research on its physical effects beyond not getting knocked up. The "it's not unusual for this to increase depression but also we are just now half a century later actually looking into this". Plus personally the arm stick was a bad fit with my dislike of needles and my need to pick at things. And there was no time of day in college where I would be able to reliably choose to take a pill. Probably 11am but then I'd need to remember to pack it with me and just, I wasn't here for that life.

Which is where we get to the IUD.

The scene, 2016. The context, I had had a condom break (intercrural, which I STRONGLY recommend) but it freaked the fellow out a bit. (He did not suggest an iud, and tbh I don't think I involved him in the decision at all. ) The other context was the 2016 election. And frankly, the Fear that was being drummed up. Not unwarranted, but, there was a spike in IUDs at that time bc people were worried about loosing access to other forms of birth control. And I doubt I was alone in worrying about loosing options in the event of a rape.

I am against abortion as a method of bieth control. But I think the way to not have abortions, is prevention. Abortions that remove a dead fetus or a dieing fetus that are protecting the mother, aren't birth control, that's sepsis management and tragic. Abortions that are only for the girl babies, are birth control and tbh the way to cut down on that animation is cultural change. It's my opinion that if a woman is going in for an abortion, something has Failed Her.

But, I was at a point where my getting pregnant would be really bad. My mental health was in a sketchy place. I was in school. And frankly not terribly employable since a science degree at a bachelor's is still all grunt work.

I looked into what options were avalible. I researched. My mother had, at some point offered to assist in getting a prescription for the pill, framed in the cramps story. Which for my sister IS why she's on it. I lucked out on not having a Catastrophe of a uterus. (Hyperbole but still).

I remember the process of going in.

I remember being Angry that in the pre-appoinment I was told that the policy was you need to get a pregnancy test up to like 2 days before or so. And I set it up so that I have a block to squeeze in this extra appointment on like the day before. I look up what to do before hand, PP recommend taking a painkiller before showing up so it has time to kick in.

I do all the steps. I go in alone. For myself, I don't want non-experts besides me involved. These are things between me, a doctor, and god and/or my/a/my understanding of amoral system.

The secretary was friendly and like, yeah Doc is doing a lot of these. Reassuring. They didn't give me any preprocedure instructions besides this test (and it was also a STI test I don't remember if that was required or I was like heck if I'm here might as well).

But the appointment happens and three plot twists. 1. They've got a better painkiller and would have preferred I hadn't taken an over the counter before. But it all worked out. And frankly the insertion was absolutely fine. Like yeah little pinch but as u recall it it was more like if you pinched a like big chunk of thigh than like finger in a door.

2. There was a med student/intern/person. I was asked if she could be in the room. Not shocking, University hospital is a teaching hospital and I'm totally chill with being a model. She seemed uncomfortable, wanted to go into pediatrics so not really relevant to her I think. Nothing hands on.

3. The thing that made me mad was that I had to take an additional pregnancy test before she would do the procedure. I took the previous test when the intake had suggested. At the same hospital. So it's all their records. And I hadn't had sex in the interim and even if I had, nothing would have had time to implant. Plus, while I recognize that technically IUD can in a few cases be an aborting procedure, by getting a copper iud, I was saying I plan on not having kids for up to the next 10 years. Thinking back on it, maaaaaayyyyybe maybe a test might have seen a pregnancy that might have been floating around to go etopic and all. But no, this felt controlling and paternalistic.

I didn't have a strategy for dealing with it. For demanding and asserting that I just did this. I did say it once, but that wasn't listened to.

And I know that this isn't an unusual or even particularly egregious example. But still.

After was lots of bleeding. I think I basically bled in some capacity for a month or two. Was on painkillers for long enough that i did get some like stomach pain or maybe just worried docs I don't remember except being told to switch to acetominiphine which I don't think works as well for me but resolved whatever the issue was. And I'm a pads person and did get a bit chapped.

After that resolved. I did have one terrifying Surprise Heavy period like a few months later. I bled through a pad. There was crying in the CVS bc there wasn't a absorbtion conversion between tampons and pads and this was all new and scary.

The next month leveled out. Though things were still heavier than pre-iud or now. But not terrible. And I've seen worse. I couldnt use my mom's strategy of the diva cup, which she got on early I think bc it's Wonderful for HEAVY flow. But between never having had success w a tampon and the potential suction removing the thing and ripping out an IUD. Not worth it.

But for the most part it settled out.

But I still think about it.

The good thing was the RELIEF of the Safety of not having to worry about ending up pregnant. Sure STIs are a risk. But back-alley or date rape transference is likely either way and at least I only have to deal with one issue instead if the moralized one. And in chosen partners, frankly they were either rather virginal. Or Defs gonna use a condom. Like, the bf in the IUD times, we still used a condom each time. (I don't know that he's done it, but he had also apperently been planning on getting a vasectomy asap, since like highschool.) The 'i never want kids' was one of the reasons we stopped dating. There were a few other reasons but like they all boiled down to 'want differnt things from the Future' which is why we are friends still.

But things will come up, and I'll remember, I've got a chunk of copper in me.

That knowledge weighs in my consideration of sense of self, and self identity. It feels representative, and significant.

I don't check for the strings as often as I should, and I think they've mostly stayed out of the way.

But this is a significant thing to me.

And a thing that I keep to myself a lot.

But I do Want to talk about it, because it is so Significant.