#man who needs cocaine when this exists

[betterbooktitles]

"I’m certain I’m not the only millennial who feels we as a nation have taken a dizzying turn when it comes to drugs. I remember a uniformed police officer showing up once a week in 5th Grade (a year before Sex Ed) to explain how to avoid buying and taking drugs. Luckily, I already knew the dangers of the drug trade because I had seen The Usual Suspects. I knew cocaine was a bad thing to buy, sell, or steal, especially from a drug kingpin. The D.A.R.E. program, however, let me know how important it was to say no to anything fun, including alcohol. At least until I understood a little algebra first. We did role-playing exercises where we walked one by one toward the portly police officer and he casually asked if we wanted to hit a mimed joint with him. All we had to do was say “no” and walk to the other side of the room, defying the only rule I knew about improv. We wrote essays about how important it was to preserve our pristine bodies and minds, obviously unsullied since we had yet to take the class teaching us how puberty was going to defile them both. I’m still mad that my friend Nicole’s essay beat mine in a contest, and she got to read hers in front of the whole school all because she had the benefit of an older brother who took too much acid and sat in her room all night talking about why the existence of light proved God was real. My essay about a time I saw my friend’s dad drink a beer and then drive his truck somewhere was also good! We signed pledges to enter the new millennium drug-free. We took the red pencils that said “Friends Don’t Let Friends Do Drugs” and sharpened all of them down to say “Let Friends Do Drugs,” “Friends Do Drugs,” “Do Drugs,” and simply “Drugs.” Despite that little rebellious act, my friends and I spent a solid six months swearing we’d never put any harmful substance into our bodies besides every form of candy available.

Imagine how I feel now as a D.A.R.E. graduate becoming my dad’s drug dealer. It’s less thrilling than I thought it would be. Between my father’s warning not to hang around one specific neighborhood in Cleveland as a kid and nearly every TV show about drugs, I thought I’d always be buying marijuana from an intimidating dude who definitely had a gun and would use it immediately if he thought I was wearing a wire. Instead, I now buy marijuana from a well-lit storefront that looks like the Apple Store. I’ve even gone to a place where a guy with an iPad explained what each available strain would do to me. I buy what sounds good with all the confidence of a man pointing at items on a menu written in a language he can’t read. I put it all in a cardboard box. I place a book on top. I mail the box to my dad from my local post office. I tell myself the book is to hide the contraband crossing state lines, but in truth, the book is what clears my conscience. I want to send my dad something edifying while also sending him the drug that all of America worried would make me unable to read if I tried it once. The unrequested book is a red herring to distract from the vice, like when you were young and didn’t want to buy condoms outright at the store so you cushioned them between a pack of peanut M&Ms and a magazine. Hmm, what else did I need, — right, while I’m here — might as well pick up a few condoms.

Right as marijuana becomes legal in most states, I’m about done with the drug. I’ve had three good times on edibles, and one of them was when I felt nothing and fell asleep at 9:30 PM. I’m flabbergasted that my dad likes edibles. He seems to be a man free of anxiety. Case in point, I once brought him some THC lozenges to our summer holiday in Chautauqua, and around dinner time I told him “You might want to only take half of what I gave you” to which he replied, “I took it hours ago.” He was stoned and no one noticed.

While I’m stuck in my head, stoned or sober, wondering why I didn’t take some acting gig 15 years ago, wondering if I’ll ever make enough money, worrying I’m doing everything wrong including in this moment as I write this sentence, my dad is enjoying himself.

Judith Grisel, the author of Never Enough: The Neuroscience And Experience of Addiction, describes using marijuana as throwing “a bucket of red paint” on your brain. She was approaching the stimulant clinically in terms of how it differed from the laser focus of other drugs (THC reacts with many receptors in the brain, cocaine focuses on one), but now every time I smoke, I think of the red paint metaphor. While other people seem able to crank an entire joint and do insanely complicated stuff like function at their jobs, I am reduced to a gelatinous blob, on top of which my eyes and brain are navigating a dream state that, like many dreams, isn’t all that interesting the next day. Mostly, I get high and can’t decide what I want to watch on TV or what video game I want to play, I realize how hungry I am, and then I fall asleep with cereal still stuck to my teeth. Pot, for me, is like the squid ink hitting the screen in Mario Kart: I can still see where I’m going, but everything gets a little harder to do, and the panicked half-blindness makes everything slightly more chaotically fun."

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Other articles include:

An essay on Claire Dederer's book Monsters and movies made by monsters.

Writing inside a Toyota Service Center.

Writing mistresses.

[tremendouscreationperson]

Logan x Reader pt.11

Lads it's here

Wade's party

Can y'all believe it?

<<Part 10 Part 12>> Masterlist

Logan and Laura sat silently at your dining table.

It would be funny if it wasn't so scary.

Their faces were stony, both merely staring at the other.

It wasn't until Logan ran a hand through his hair - it needed a trim, it was getting long - and cleared his throat.

“I'm sorry.”

Laura nodded, biting the inside of her jaw. She was sorry too. She really hadn't meant what had happened. Hated herself for causing any sort of pain.

“I know I was shitty but I was scared.” He paused. “Which doesn't help because you were scared, too.”

She shrugged one shoulder.

“I love her, Laura.” He vowed. “I know you do, too. And I know you hate yourself but she doesn't blame you and neither do I.”

Laura's eyes watered, she quickly blunk the tears away.

“So again I'm sorry.” He held a hand out. “Do you accept my apology?”

She nodded and met his hand with a firm shake.

“Right, now we have to beat your mother at Monopoly, she's a wizard at that game.”

~~

Wade did in fact hold his party off until Sunday, giving you an extra day to reassure Laura you were real.

Gambit had tackled you to the floor in a hug until Logan pulled the man off of you.

“Thou’we lo’ya, I ca’ ‘lieve yo’ alive! Thank heavens.” You frowned until it locked in and you nodded. Years of living with him making you fluent in Cajun, sometimes it took a moment but you understood.

“No, you'd never lose me!” You sat up and smiled.

Gambit was kneeling - having been hoisted up by his shirt like a kitten - giving you the widest grin. “I'm so ‘ppy, chere. Miss Laura was worried.”

You let him stand and help you to your feet. “She doesn't have to be now, I'm here.” Posing with your non-muscles, and dramatically declaring, “My body's strong, I can heal from anything!”

Blade had bowed his head when he saw you - slipping in to see what the commotion was - but you didn't let him get away with just that so you pulled him into a half hug.

“You alive?”

“I am.”

“Keep it that way.”

You scoffed. “It was definitely my intention.”

He rolled his eyes but patted your head. “I'm out, gotta finish my hunt before this famous ‘party’.”

One day you were going to force him to take you with him. You wanted to meet a vampire! Yes, technically, he was one but he wasn't! He was Blade. Your brother.

You let Blade leave and smiled at the rest of the room. Wade was on the phone making party arrangements whilst Al asked for more cocaine.

Laura was yet to make an appearance. She was a little embarrassed. These people had seen her at her worst. She needed time.

Gambit sat next to Al. She eased into him and began moaning about her roommate.

Mary Puppins twaddled towards you and you bent to pick her up. She was still wearing her dogpool outfit and you couldn't help but smile down at the ugly creature.

“Uh uh uh.” Wade was off of the phone shaking his head. “Maya forgot she existed so you're not allowed to hold her!”

“Wade, I have no idea who you're talking about.” You shook your head but let him snatch her from you.

Wade snuggled his face into her and made obscene kissy noises.

Logan raised a brow. “Seriously?”

“It's nothing compared to what we hear.” Wade smiles too wide and let his eyes shift between you two. “Where's babyrine?”

“She's going to come, I told her we were going to watch one of my favourite movies.”

“The Labyrinth is the best movie.” El announced walking through the door, her hair was wet from showering as she had just returned from the gym.

“I know right!” You agreed. “Let me text Laura that we're going to start soon.”

You'd finally received your phone. There were a few missed calls from Gambit, El and Blade but that was because of the confusion.

Y/N: were going to start the movie in 10 x

Laura: ok x

It was a good thing she decided she could speak through texting. At least this time you had a way to connect. Last time she was nonverbal was a struggle.

You and Logan sat on one sofa. Him resting his back against the arm and you laying your back on his chest. El sat next to Gambit, resting her feet on his legs.

Wade sighed at you all taking up his space but threw snacks at everyone before plonking himself down on the shag rug. Mary made a home on his back as he lay on his front.

“Oh my god, someone take a photo.”

You quickly snapped a few pics of them and sent them via WhatsApp to him. WhatsApp was just like texting except you used WiFi so it was free? You weren't sure but Wade had corralled you all into using the app.

Wade found the movie and inserted the DVD just as Laura crept in.

“Hey baby, come sit with us.”

She eyed Logan but did tiptoe over, he had been acting kind. He was nicer now. Not as angry.

She supposed she was too.

You were safe.

She was able to be with you again.

To have you as her mother again.

She wouldn't have handled your death well.

When she was within reach you pulled her wrist and made her sit on the sofa you were lounging on.

Laura eased back and rested her cheek on your chest, you stroked her hair.

“Okay we're ready. Press play!” You ordered Wade who was staring at Laura in disbelief. Mary Puppins had scooted over to her and jumped up and onto your stomach so Laura could pet her.

“I know you guys are 'healing' and whatever but fuck you all! That's my dog!”

“Shut up and play the movie.” Logan flipped him off.

“Mhmmm.” Al threw a cushion in his direction.

The movie was just as great now as it was then, except for Laura leaning on you. You forgot she had an Adamantium skeleton and were slowly being clamped down on but other than that you loved it. Your stomach was sore when the credits rolled.

“I don' kno’.” Gambit shrugged. “I think I would've stayed.”

“I know I would've.” El agreed.

“Yes.” You frantically nodded. “David Bowie offering me anything I want as long as I love him? Sign me up.”

Laura sat up, effortlessly hopping off to stretch her back and releasing the hold on your organs. She gave you a face and shook her head.

“No? Laura!” You chuckled. “You wouldn't stay?”

She shrugged.

“I wis’ my pants made m’ dick look like that.” Gambit hummed. “All big n’ sexy.”

“Well, it's really more of a curse than a blessing.” Wade shrugged. “I have to order in custom trousers.” He wiggled his red booty shorts.

“Is he revealing himself again?” Al shook her head. “Mother fucker doesn't know how many pillows I got.” Wade was currently in a nest of them due to her throwing.

“What about you, handsome?” You tilted your neck to find Logan's eyes were closed. “Bab-”

“No, don't wake him!” Wade whisper-yelled.

You looked back at the man who was positively giddy. Wade rushed off and came back with a Sharpie.

“We are all in this together, Wildcats.” Wade informed the group. “If I go down I am taking each and every one of you with me.”

He uncapped the lid and drew a very crude penis on Logan's forehead.

“All this hair makes it hard to graffiti him.”

Laura giggled as Wade stepped back. She gave a thumbs up on approval. El rolled her eyes whilst Gambit snapped a photo.

“Y/N, giv’ t’ dick a suck.” You snorted and poked your tongue out in the direction of his face.

“He is going to whoop all y'all asses.” Al chuckled as she heaved herself up. “Someone needs to film that for me, do a visual description and read it or turn it into braille.”

~~

Today was the day.

You had washed, styled and readied yourself.

Putting on the lilac dress you'd brought, with white knee high socks and some slip on shoes. You hadn't thought to buy nicer shoes because you all lived in the same building. You didn't even need to wear shoes to his.

Logan had unfortunately taken the nails off but he was forgiven because as styled his now longer hair - in the same fashion he always did - his kitten ears were back!

He picked up a flannel shirt to throw on top of his vest and jeans. It was almost insulting that he didn't need to put any effort in to look that good.

You smirked up to him, giving him a quick peck and went to check on Laura.

She was half dressed in jeans looking at different bottoms and an array of shirts.

She turned to smile in acknowledgement when you entered her bedroom.

“Struggling to pick?”

She nodded.

It was hard. You knew it when you had a panic attack while shopping. Too many choices meant different variables, different outcomes.

You plucked up the nearest shirt - a small red thing - and an over layer - a denim button up vest - and handed it to her.

“I think that will match your jeans well. Wanna show me?”

She slipped into the materials and you were right. You hadn't even thought about it, just making a choice and half lying to help her.

She scanned the outfit in the floor length mirror before giving it a final nod.

The two of you met back up with Logan, who was already opening a beer bottle.

“Already?” You raised a brow.

“I know I'll need it.” He chuckled.

“Hmm.” Your eyes swept across the dining table. “Did you move one of my hotels?”

A half finished game of Monopoly was set up and you were dominating.

“Would I?”

“Yes, you would!” You patted his jeans pockets. “Where is it?”

“Laura, tell her I'm innocent.” He laughed at your attempt at a strip search.

“I will find it.”

Logan shook his head, taking another swig and hoped to god you didn't check in the fridge.

You'd counted the amount of them left so he couldn't just put it back in the box, no it was sitting in his beer carton.

Laura was smiling easily at the two of you. She liked watching you both so clearly in love.

It was beautiful to see you at ease, you had always worried over her and ensured she was alright. Seeing you truly happy was a godsend.

She hadn't particularly cared for Logan not since her Logan but he wore the man's face so she couldn't help but feel comfortable around him. Couldn't help but feel bad when he was upset, she wanted him to like her. To be that father figure. Seeing him with you might be the closest to that she'd ever get. It was pleasant, if not slightly sad.

“Right kid.” You ruffled her hair. “Let's get going, eh? It's such a long journey.”

She rolled her eyes but allowed you to lead her to Wade's.

Logan was shadowing the both of you, he had decided to make peace with Laura. She was a kid and the closest thing to a child the two of you would get. He vowed to make her like him.

Wade had cleaned the apartment.

He. Had. Cleaned.

Hallelujah.

It was a miracle.

“Hey!” The man waved you over with one hand, the other clutching his baby. “Come and mingle!”

Laura stuck close to you as you agreed, heading straight over to the people he gestured towards.

“Y/N, Wolverines, this is Buck and Shatterstar.”

“Hi.” You shook their hands. “This is Laura and Logan.”

“You don't have to talk to them, they're extras. We're not paying them to talk.” Wade spun you to the next people. “This is Yukio, we love Yukio, and Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Real name unknown. Annoys the fuck out of me so just call her whatever you want.”

“Hi.” You pulled Laura closer to the young girls. They were stark opposites. Yukio was bubbly and colourful whilst Negasonic Teenage Warhead - shit that was a name - was dark and gloomy. “This is Laura. She is amazing. We've experienced a bit of a tough time so sadly she's nonverbal at the moment but I'm sure you girls would get along.”

God you were turning into your mother.

Yukio waved, her bangles jingling. “Hi Laura. It's nice to meet you.”

Laura untucked her hands from her pockets and waved back, smiling shyly.

“Do you want to sit and watch TV or something? Get away from prying eyes.” Negasonic made direct eye contact with Wade.

Laura turned to you before agreeing and the girls sat on the unoccupied couch.

“That's surely not her name.” You whispered as Wade produced the next victim. “Oh, hi.”

It was B-15. She was standing, drink in hand, next to a man. He had a moustache and seemed harmless.

“Hello.” B-15 smiled.

“B-15 was the lovely lady who Logan annoyed into getting you here. And here is the love of my life-" he dramatically spoke "-Peter.”

Some things never change.

“How's things?” You asked the two.

“Going steady.” B-15 replied. “We've had a few issues with another being but we think that's been resolved.”

“You're talking about the Kang dynasty being written out because of the actor right?” Wade asked excitedly as Mary Puppins wriggled in his hands. He let her down and she trotted off towards the girls.

“Things are good for me at work too.” Peter sipped his cup.

Footsteps halted any response from you as you turned to see - fucking hell - Colossus duck through the door.

“I hate your apartment’s parking.” He dusted himself off.

“You're friends with Colossus?”

Wade clapped. “Ahh you know him.”

“He's… well he's a lot fucking bigger.” You mattered. “Piotr.” You held your hand out. “My name is Y/N.”

He was careful as he shook your hand. “Pleasure.”

The party progressed and your group found their way to mingle with others.

Gambit was talking to Buck and Dopinder, El had made friends with Colossus, Blade had enticed Negasonic Teenage Warhead - you needed to find out her real name - Al was comfortable sitting with B-15 and Peter and Yukio stuck with Laura - who you swore was moving her lips.

You found yourself in the kitchen, making drinks and tidying the mess. Wade had attempted to cook but after almost burning the building down opted for take out.

The mess gave you something to do whilst you waited on your dinner. Made you feel at home. The chatter just above the music swirled around you as you washed up the final bowl.

“That's usually my job.” A beautiful woman spoke from your side.

“Sorry.” You offered.

“It's okay.” She smiled and leant against the counter. “I'm Vanessa.”

Oh. She was the one Wade liked. “Y/N.”

“Been a hell of a month, eh?”

“That's an understatement.” You dried your hands.

“Wine?” She offered. “He hides the good stuff from Al.” Vanessa opened a cupboard by your knees and behind the cleaning supplies was a bottle of wine.

You didn't know the difference between ‘the good stuff’ and ‘the regular stuff’. “I'm sorry to say but I think wine tastes like piss. Has he got any rum or flavoured gin down there?”

Vanessa chuckled but delved deeper finding a bottle of rum.

She poured you a decent amount, letting you grab your mixer and then poured herself a wine.

“The scary one yours?” She nodded to Logan who was currently in a heated debate with Wade.

“Yup.”

“And you have a pup.” She commented.

“Laura and Logan.”

“I want kids.” She whispered to herself before shaking her head. “How'd you guys find each other?”

“Oh, well we're all from broken homes. We all just met.” You sipped your drink. “I met her and took her in, then I found him again. He took us both in.”

“Oh so she's not yours?” Vanessa's eyes widened. “I didn't mean that.”

“No.” You forgave her. “I know what you meant. She isn't mine but she's technically his. It's a really long story. If you want to hear it I'll happily tell you but you have to be prepared.”

Vanessa nodded and you told her your tale until the doorbell rang and food was being plated up.

Negasonic Teenage Warhead had come up to you and told you Laura was very sweet. She informed you that they had exchanged numbers and that her name was in fact “Ellie” but forbade you to ever speak it in front of Wade.

Wade had forced two tables together and stole every chair in the building for you all. Ellie, Yukio, Buck, El, Gambit, you and B-15 sat on one side of the table, whilst Laura, Logan, Wade, Vanessa, Shatterstar, Peter and Dopinder sat at the other. Colossus and Blade were at the heads.

Dinner was nice. It was Chinese food. You all had a healthy amount and ate with a regular banter.

It was just like being in the X-Mansion.

You noticed Logan relieve Wade of Mary and saw Wade's nervous breath as he spoke to Vanessa.

Your Wolverines smiled over the world's ugliest dog.

It was so domestic.

So lovely.

You loved them so much.

“They're very cute.” El nudged you with her elbow.

“I know.” You may be biassed.

“I'm glad they're getting on.” She spoke lowly, you knew if they wanted they could hear but spoke in the same tone of voice back.

“Was it really awful?”

“She's done a complete 180.”

You sighed. “Sometimes I wish I didn't hold that power over them. I'm going to die, El, they aren't.”

She turned to face you fully. “They'll be happy with whatever they get from you.”

“I know.”

“They love you.” She rubbed your back.

“And I love them.”

“I love you.”

You smirked. “And I love you, El. I don't know if I would've survived out there without you.”

“Same.” She pulled you in for a hug and you squeezed her.

~~

It was later in the evening when Logan pulled you close. He had slipped off onto the fire escape for a break, bottle in hand and a cigar in his back pocket case anyone - Wade - questioned him.

You had found him and he motioned for you to be quiet as you joined.

The window was silently shut and he brought you to his chest.

“Why are you out here?” You whispered. “It's cold.”

“I'm warm now.” He kissed your crown. His back was against the brick of the building, in between two windows, to hide himself. You were brought in close, in hopes to conceal the two of you.

"I've been sent to bring you in, we're taking photos. I've been in so many." You giggled, slightly buzzed.

"Let me hold you for another couple minutes."

You hummed in response, wrapping your arms tighter around his waist.

“It's been a cute little party.” You commented, resting your head on him as you looked out into the distance. The buildings were beautiful. It was still relatively early so lights were shining. Each building was its own Christmas tree with colour. There was the standard warm white, purples, blues, a lime green. They all shine individually in a beautiful mosaic.

The fact that everyone was living their own life struck you. And this was one universe. The bazillions of lives that were out there was too crazy to even try to conceive.

“Your brain is loud.” He ran a hand down your back causing you to shiver. The hand landed on your ass and gave it a squeeze.

“Stop it.” You warned.

Logan raised his eyebrows in a taunt and pulled the skirt of your dress up to squeeze the pillowy flesh.

“I can't mark you any more.” He spoke plainly. It was true. The bruises he'd gift your neck now healed. He couldn't claim you and it was driving him towards insanity.

“So you want to show me off to the whole of New York?” You finished his sentence. “I don't think a public indecency charge is quite the same as leaving a hickey.”

He hummed and took a final swig of beer. “You know what you've done to me all night?” He ground his hip into you and you felt his erect dick. “You in your little dress and socks.”

“I am sorry.” You spoke without a hint of apology in your being, actually cupping him in your hand as you spoke, “It wasn't my intention.”

He groaned. “When you were sitting on our bed putting them on I knew it would be a hard night. You look like an innocent... kitten. I wanted to fuck you into next week right there and then. Wanted to have you sit on my face when you were plodding around looking for a pair of shoes. Wanted to fill you up when you were looking for that hotel.”

Fuck me. Why was he so- “So you admit there's a hotel missing?”

Logan let out a full body laugh. His chest rumbling. “I am going to fucking ruin you.”

You worried your lip in anticipation. “We better get back to bed then.”

“Why wait?”

Your eyes bulged. “You want to fuck me here?”

He looked away and shrugged playfully.

“I don't think we'd have enough time.”

“You're worried you'd be heard.”

Fuck him.

“Maybe.”

He smirked but took a step away from the wall. “C’mon. Let's say our goodbyes.”

You both re-entered the party and Wade whooped loudly. "Finally! Come on stand with Laura!"

You'd forgotten the party was waiting on you. Imagine if you had let him take you out there.

The two of you met Laura who was sheepishly smiling. You were positioned in-between the wolverines.

"Say cheese!" Vanessa joked as she held the phone.

Laura repeated the word, making the first photo taken you and Logan breaking your necks to look at her as she grinned widely.

~~

You were flickering through the thousands of photos that were sent, perching on the arm of your sofa. Slightly tipsy as you giggled whilst swiped at them, some of them were so silly.

You'd posed with your Void family, taken candids of Wade and Vanessa, there were a few of Al and Gambit that Wade hated, Yukio has sent over a few of her, Ellie and Laura. There was a group ‘selfie’ - you'd just learned the word despite taking some - that was pure chaos.

You deleted a few that were doubles and when it got to you and your Wolverines your finger hovered above the recycle bin.

“Don't delete that one.”

You jumped, not realising he was there. Logan was leaning over the back of the sofa staring at your phone.

“My eyes are closed.” You explain.

“Because you're laughing.”

“Exactly, I have a double chin.” Wade had made you all laugh. Logan and Laura were smiling on the lower end of the spectrum whilst you were cackling like a witch in the middle. “It's a bad photo.”

“It's not if you're in it.”

You playfully rolled your eyes, basking in the compliment, and leaned into his shoulder. He had removed the flannel shirt so his shoulders were bare.

“I love your slutty little vests.”

He huffed in amusement. “My slutty little vests?”

You nod, speaking into his neck. “You're unfairly handsome. With your little waist and kitty cat hair.”

“Are you drunk?”

“No.” You pulled up, staring into his soul. “But Gambit was pouring drinks so I'm halfway.”

Logan chuckled and stood upright. He disappeared into the kitchen, much to your annoyance, and reappeared with a glass of water and some tablets. “Here.”

You accepted what he offered and swallowed the tablets with no complaints. “See how good I am at swallowing?” You wink.

Logan was taken aback. He truly hadn't expected that from you.

“What Lo? Cat got your tongue?” You batted your eyes at him. “You were all talk earlier.”

Logan licked his lips and took the glass from your hands. Placing it on the side table. He leant his hands on either side of your legs on the sofa's arm. His nose inches from yours.

“I don't think you could handle it.”

You giggled. “Logan, I don't think you-” your pointer finger touched his chest, “-could handle it.”

He lent in to kiss you but side swept. What absolute bastard behaviour! You moaned as he stood to his full height. “C’mon. Bed time.”

Bed time?!

Bed time.

Is he being- bed time?!

You grumbled before demanding, “Are you being serious? Logan.”

“You're drunk.” He folded his arms.

“No, I'm really not.” Being so close and denied was very sobering.

He smiled softly down at your pout.

Logan offered you his hand and you huffed before accepting; getting up and letting him lead you to your room.

“Don’t think I don't want to. Earlier I was feeling the buzz, I was ready like you are now, but I can't really be inebriated so I don't think it would be right.”

Logan brought you to the bathroom, setting you on to the lip of the bath to help you with your ablutions.

“It's not rapey.” You rambled. “I respect how you feel but me being tipsy and wanting to be with sober you isn't weird. We're a coup-” You stopped yourself.

It was too late.

“We're a couple?” He teased, wiping your face with a cotton pad covered in micellar water.

He tilted your face as you asked. “Well… we are, aren't we?” Brows high.

“‘course we are.” He tossed the pad in the bin. “You're my girl.”

The warm feeling you got was actually so highschool. You shouldn't have these butterflies, you're a woman.

He spoke after a while, silently helping you wash your face. “You gotta send me those photos.”

“Did Wade not send them?” Your hands which were holding your hair out of the way dropped to your sides.

“I blocked that dick the second day I got a phone.” He chuckled. “He likes to text.”

You smirked up at him. “I'll send them.”

Logan's palms cupped your cheeks. “Good, ‘cause you looked drop dead gorgeous tonight.”

@littlecrowtime @geeksareunique @lovelyvaderx @br3nt-12 @st1nkabutt @maximumchilddreamland @catiwinky @twinkywink @ravenmedows @electricreader @racetrackheart @vulgarfuckinvirgo77 @bisasterbisexual @tzurue @narniansmagic @seamlessepiphany @4ria790 @caramelatae @mei-simp @slightlymediocree

The butterflies were back, your tummy and cheeks warming.

Part 12

[rafeskiss]

florida!!! ! ᥫ᭡

pairing: bsf!rafe cameron x reader

summary: reader’s boyfriend cheats on her so rafe plans to make her forget all about him by taking her to florida.

warnings: no smut, not much, rafe laces someone’s cocaine with fent, protective rafe, i don’t really know 😊

authors note: FIRST RAFE POST!! i know ive only ever posted for sturniolo tumblr but id like to preface my account isn’t solely for them, and i will be posting content for other fandoms as well!

love left me like this, i don’t want to exist so take me to florida

when naive!kook!reader and her boyfriend, a good-for-nothing fuck boy, one to a worse degree than her best friend rafe was, broke up… rafe was more than happy to finally step in.

it was as simple as that rafe couldn’t let that man sleep peacefully knowing that he broke his poor best friend’s heart.

when you showed up at tannyhill, your big doe eyes all teary eyed and smeared mascara running down your cute cheeks, rafe already knew it had something to do with that little boyfriend of yours.

secretly, he had been waiting for this exact moment. he had been waiting ever since you told him that one of the boys he plays golf with asked you on a date. you were just too sweet for him. for any of these boys on the island. no, you needed someone who could really protect you and make you feel feminine and comfortable, something these boys couldn’t do except for him. he knew you better than anyone and had much more to give you than everyone else, but being the naive girl you are, you didn’t see past the friendship.

“aw, baby.” he frowned before embracing you in a tight hug. you wrapped your arms around his neck, silently crying into his arms.

your voice broke, “he cheated on me,”

rafe’s jaw clenched, but he wasn’t surprised. not one bit. “ ‘m so sorry.”

he didn’t ever directly warn you about boys like him. he couldn’t ruin the happiness you had when that guy started showing interest in you.

this wasn’t even supposed to happen, actually. you weren’t aware of this, but rafe may or may not have told every guy who ever expressed interest in you to fuck off. a simple hands-off rule. he’d threaten them, say that if they so much as talk to you, they’d wish they didn’t. only one person dared to test that rule. he started flirting with you and commenting on your instagram pictures. rafe solved that problem quickly and easily by lacing his next bag of coke with a little bit of fentanyl. he didn’t die. it taught him a lesson. taught mostly every boy on the island a lesson, except for your now ex-boyfriend.

so he couldn’t put fentanyl in this fucker’s coke this time because the boy never mentioned you to him. they played golf regularly, never speaking of you. and then one day, rafe picks you up from your house to take you shopping and you excitedly tell him how one of his friends followed you on instagram and asked to take you out. that guy knew what he was doing.

he maneuvered the hands-off rule because he knew rafe would never let it happen.

after a few minutes of consoling you, rafe broke the silence. “y’wanna go to florida?”

you stopped crying, pulled away from the hug and peered up at him. “what?”

he grinned, “i’m serious. let’s go to florida, yeah?”

you shook your head, “that won’t fix anything, rafe.”

truth be told, rafe believes money can in fact buy happiness. and he’d spend every last dime in his pocket if it meant you forgot all about that stupid boy and became happy, especially if it meant you were happy with him.

“it’ll be fun. lemme show you a good time, promise you’ll forget all about him. it would be good for ya to at least get out of the obx.”

“why florida?” you asked, sniffling and wiping a tear. rafe lifted up his shirt, revealing his lower toned abdomen, and wiped your mascara off your face, wiping your nose too. something only dad’s do for their young daughters, and rafe too, you guess.

he shrugs, “why not? we gotta place there. nice place right on the miami coast. just a change of scenery, s’all.”

so the next day, rafe pulled into your house’s driveway. you stood by the front door, a suitcase next to you. rafe smiled as he got out of his car, “only one suitcase?”

“you think i need more?” you asked in a surprised tone.

he shrugged, “i just planned a couple things snd you might need more than a couple outfits for ‘em. s’all good though, we can buy you some more when we get there.” he said while grabbing your pink suitcase effortlessly and placing it in the backseat of his car.

you were completely unaware of rafe’s true intentions by this out of the blue trip to florida. you didn’t think anything of the sweet things rafe did for you. he was your best friend, and he looks out for you. he just cares for you, like any friend would.

once you arrived in florida, being taken there by the cameron’s private plane, the first thing you did was get a fancy facial from a very luxurious med spa. one sarah went to anytime their family visited florida, which is why rafe knew of the place. he paid for you to get the longest, most expensive, and best treatment there was.

afterwards, you guys went out to dinner at a small restaurant on a dock.

you thought he was just being sweet.

you thought he was just being sweet when he bought everything you laid your eyes on in small boutiques and even large luxury stores like chanel and tiffany.

and rafe’s plan worked. by the first four days, your ex’s name never came out of your mouth. the only name on your lips was rafe, and his next plan was to keep it that way.

all that’s left to do was convince you there was someone better for you out there. and that someone was him. you didn’t see it yet, but you would by the end of the trip. he would make you his.

[wowcatboys]

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♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

HEARTSTEEL KAYN: HEADCANONS ♡ TW : Drug mentions/Usage ♡ TW: Food mentions ♡ No pairings/ not reader-insert

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

KAYN 

Ever since joining Heartsteel, Kayn's 'Rhaast' outbursts have lessened in frequency and severity. Of course, his alter-ego makes regular appearances, but being with a group that encourages and accepts him rather than holds him back and tries to get him under control has made it so that Kayn feels less need to express his feelings in such an explosive, reckless way. Of course, he'll never admit that his newfound friends are the reason for his recent (very, VERY slight) stability.

Kayn is extremely choosy with his jewelry. He fronts like he doesn't want to wear "cheap, lame shit"—but actually, he just reacts to most metals. If he doesn't check to make sure his earrings are hypoallergenic, he ends up with a massive rash. Why the excuse? He is NOT about to admit he has sensitive skin.

Probably not a surprise, but Kayn breaks his phone CONSTANTLY. With all his reckless antics, it's rare for a new phone to last him more than a few months. The silver lining is that he at least has his emergency contacts (the Heartsteel members, of course) memorized from entering them into his contacts list so often.

Kayn also has a burner phone he uses for Rhaast.

Maybe you'd expect Kayn to have an enormous rager for his birthday, but the truth is, he doesn't actually like that many people. Instead he invites a handful of his actual friends to the shared Heartsteel apartment for a joint Halloween/birthday party. Costumes mandatory, noise complaints expected. Kayn will tell you to your face if he thinks your costume is stupid.

Kayn's got a lucky guitar pick. Somehow, he’s never lost it.

Wherever Kayn goes, property damage often follows. For Heartsteel's sake, he's cleaned up his act a tiny bit, mostly because he's scared of respects Yone, who gets pissed whenever Kayn breaks too much shit. But come on, you can't deny a man all of life's simple pleasures—you gotta let him graffiti the side of a water tower every once in awhile, or blow up the occasional car.

Notorious for social media rampages, Kayn's been banned from using the Heartsteel twitter. (The last straw was him using the account to threaten a member of his old band. Apparently, Alune didn't think "I'LL FUKKIN DOXX U LOL" an appropriate use of the official twitter account.) He's still semi-active on his personal accounts, but only in sporadic bursts.

Kayn knows how to tie a knot in a cherry stem with his tongue.

Like most rockstars, Kayn dabbles in cocaine. His drug use is pretty limited, though, mostly because he doesn't really need drugs to be high-energy and unhinged. When clips of his erratic behavior surface or Kayn goes on a twitter rampage, newer fans often speculate about Kayn being on drugs. Veteran Heartbeats know that he’s just Like That, though. 

Kayn says he doesn't have a favorite bandmate. (He does. It's Ezreal.)

A lot of the time, Kayn has to be reminded to eat. When he's busy writing songs or hanging out with the band, stopping for a bite never crosses his mind. Thankfully, Sett's on top of his meal schedule (gotta hit those macros!) so he'll remind Kayn that lunch is a Thing That Exists.

Kayn spends a ridiculous amount of time on his nails. Cuticles? Trimmed. Polish? Immaculate, and always black or burgundy. Topcoat? Applied and glass-smooth. Of course he'll deny that his nail routine is so precise because it doesn't fit his devil-may-care image, but come on. Chipped OPI and hangnails? Couldn't be him.

Kayn hates nothing more than the passenger seat. Let him drive! Yes, he knows that he's gotten two speeding tickets in the past three months. Yes, he's completely aware that K'sante got violently carsick the last time Kayn drove everyone to Taco Bell. He does not care. He will NEVER care. Driving is fun and driving recklessly is really fun.

You won't catch Kayn in a salon. He dyes and cuts his own hair in his bathroom. (How is it still so perfect?!)

Kayn is way too eager to help Aphelios pull pranks on people. Unfortunately, he can dish it out, but he can't take it. A prank on Kayn has a 50/50 chance of putting him in a sour, bitchy mood for the next hour.

Of all the band members, Kayn's the one that spends the most time alone. He doesn't have many friends outside Heartsteel. And, even though he knows his band has his back and he appreciates them, he needs frequent social breaks.

Kayn's the ultimate night owl. It's rare for him to go to bed before 4 AM. Despite this, he's always up before ten. Maybe it's Yone's rigorous recording schedule that gets him up. Maybe he's so high-energy, his body can't stand staying still for more than six hours. Maybe, though, it's just all the Monster energy drinks.

Consider it a sign that he likes you if Kayn spam-texts you. If he doesn't, he won't even bother responding. (But, if he suddenly stops texting you out of the blue? Don't worry. He probably broke his phone. Again.)

[nunalastor]

Resident Evil AU

Would RE8 happen before or after Alastor’s death? Seen scenarios for both pop up but what I wonder about is how the story would even start. Alastor was in Louisiana when he died, which makes sense, the mold in this AU is tied to Roo instead of bioterrorism, so the BSAA is not getting involved because they probably don’t exist. So Alastor and Guy were never put in witness protection and moved to Europe. And if Guy, unlike Mia, is suffering from a terminal illness, Miranda wouldn’t be able to impersonate him believably because Alastor would have Guy’s symptoms memorized.

If RE8 were to happen, I think it would after Alastor is already in hell. That explains Guy’s absence without him needing to be kidnapped again and Miranda needing to impersonate a dying man, and explains the different location if Alastor’s journey took him to another circle in the pride ring, there are nine circles and the RE8 village being one of them run by the four lords isn’t a stretch. 

That still brings up the question of who Rose would be unless it’s Charlie, but if it is, where is Lucifer? Does this imply Roo is in the Miranda role as the one responsible for the mold, and her whole villain motive is different (it would have to be, Miranda’s motive is to revive dead child, hard to do in hell)? No idea, but it does explain how Alastor can have his death in Louisiana and the ending of RE8. There’s no way he experiences RE8 and doesn’t go to heaven.

Also Alastor already has experience but combined with his Radio Demon powers, he doesn’t give a shit until he is up against the lords who pose a real threat to him. Crazy old lady appears? Shoot her, end the game before leaving the tutorial. Villagers turning into lycans? No big deal, do some cocaine before leaving the burning building, he is not having another one of these nights sober. That also opens the door to Alastor isn’t as alone as he was the first time, he may be trying to find the other members of the hotel and have interactions with them. Other hotel members could be the POV it switches to after Alastor becomes temporarily unavailable.

If Carmilla is the arms dealer in hell, that implies Alastor constantly going to her and dropping off a pile of crystalized corpses he’s been keeping in his bag to sell her in exchange for weapons, and she is left wondering what the hell he is doing to have this many corpses lying around. This will be coming up in the next overlord meeting. 

👀

[lulu2992]

Lmao I trust Sharky's infinite wisdom on duct tape, but in my opinion, I think he forgot to consider the power of cement! Also, I am liking a combination of both of these ideas! And ultimately it just makes their stories all the more unfortunate and tragic ; v ;

I don't think we really need to take into account the minimum age for juvie, and though the maximum age is 18, the time one stays may vary. But I'm thinking because this would've occurred about 5 years before the OPAC was beginning to be considered, Jacob lying about his age wouldn't really have to be necessary at all. As for his dog tag, well. It's hilarious, someone definitely fucked up and we're never going to know exactly who probably

The way I'm looking at it, Joseph can be an unreliable narrator because his perspective is very biased; the very nature of writing from specific characters is only an account of their experiences as they see and interpret them to be, which may not be entirely factually accurate. And because of cut content, changes, vague information, etc. perhaps not all the information we take in from the game as players is wholly accurate either. And I'm treating the extra/supporting content in much the same way.

(Also I've been doing a crazy amount of supplementary research on Christianity in general and also just what events took place historically, and I bet John had a hell of a time during and following the Great Recession.)

Of course, we know that the ages from the PlayAsia Blog are not official, but I don't think John's age is impossible specifically because of his profession. Man's been on cocaine for god knows how long- But people graduating from law school exceptionally early or young is not unprecedented (also I'm just very biased about him). The only real age conflict is that, though TBOJ originally describes Joseph from the start as "a child of about ten," but then he later specifies that he was exactly 7, 3 years off but still a small leap, but going by those dates, John wouldn't even exist for another 3 years as well... I've definitely hand waved this and shuffled the event further haha. I need to reread Absolution, but MAN what's with that! (Also sorry this is so long, I've gotten so passionate! I'm so happy you're passionate about fc5 still too!!)

Joseph is indeed an unreliable narrator with a very personal worldview, and some of the things he wrote in the book are definitely biased, but I still believe most of the inconsistencies between The Book of Joseph and Far Cry 5 are just... mistakes, mostly because the story and characters went through many changes, as you said. By the way, I wish we knew when this book was written and who the real-life author is! There are cool drawings in it too, and even though I like to imagine Joseph illustrated it himself, I don’t think they gave credit to the artist(s), but I could be wrong (I don’t have a physical copy; I’m sad).

I hadn’t really thought about this but it’s true that, if John was already born (and even going to school so at least 5) when Joseph was 7, then The Book of Joseph is in contradiction with Playasia because the information sheets say they were born 10 years apart. That said, Absolution also suggests John is at least a decade younger than the Father, so that’s inconsistent with The Book of Joseph as well… And if we want to trust Playasia, Jacob is 12 years older than John and 2 years older than Joseph, so he was either 17-18 or 9-10 when he burned their adoptive parents’ property and was sent to juvie, which... doesn’t really work either.

I think we’re going to need more cement :’)

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Psycho Analysis: Snowflame

(WARNING! This analysis contains C-C-C-COCAINE!)

Imagine this absurd concept: A supervillain cartel boss whose powers are fueled by him getting high off his own supply. Imagine too that this man wears a ridiculous outfit, and exists to be an anti-drug PSA that fails epically because he makes doing drugs look awesome. Now also imagine that everything about him is played completely straight without a single bit of acknowledgment of how absurd and campy the whole thing is.

That, my friends, is Snowflame.

The New Guardians is a comic series that would have been long forgotten as a crusty relic of the late 80s if not for giving the world the absolute coolest villain ever conceived. Snowflame has amassed a cult following the likes of which would make Jim Jones envious, due to the sheer absurdity of his existence and the pure unadulterated action movie villain charm of his dialogue. He’s perhaps one of the most minor villains out there with only a handful of appearances to his name, but he’s loved more than villains who’ve appeared twenty times as much as him.

I’m here to show you why.

Motivation/Goals: Snowflame is a cartel leader, and so he really wants to peddle drugs. Guess which drug is his forte. Go on, guess. And that’s really all there is to him! I need to reiterate that his threat as a cartel leader is played completely and utterly straight even as he spouts off the hammiest dialogue you’ve ever seen and literally gets a power up by snorting coke. This is the very core of his appeal, in that he is something genuinely terrifying and threatening but presented in a way only a comic book can pull off.

Of course, his true motivation is far, far simpler.

Look at this man. That is the face of a man who exists solely to snort illicit substances up his nose. He lives to be high. That is the extent of his desires, and all else is second to that simple goal. As long as he can ignite and continue to be the instrument of cocaine's will, he is satisfied.

Final Fate: Every single time Snowflame shows up, he dies. In his initial appearance, he apparently blows up, but three decades later, he makes his coke-fueled return to do battle with Catwoman, and despite inhaling enough cocaine to kill an elephant, a feat that should theoretically make him nigh invincible, he fucking dies.

...Or does he? Snowflame returns yet again in Peacemaker Tries Hard! Here he does battle with, you guessed it,

...who puts a poison dart frog in his cocaine and kills him.

Maybe. My theory is that Snowflame is the Kenny of the DC universe, and whenever some bastard kills him his coke-fueled powers just respawn him the next day.

Best Scene: While his fight against Catwoman is unfortunately lackluster as ordained by the writers (Selina is not lasting two seconds against Snowflame and his coke-fueled powers under realistic circumstances), it gave us one of the most gorgeous and badass panels ever made:

Really brings a tear to your eye, doesn’t it?

Best Quote: Yeah, there’s no fucking contest here, it’s this:

Final Thoughts & Score: I think I speak for all of us when I say Snowflame is one of the greatest fucking characters ever conceived.

Everything about him is a towering testament to what makes the medium of comic books great. The best villains tend to be the wildest and most out-there concepts, like a giant alien starfish that mind controls people, or a gay gorilla in love with a brain in a jar, or a giant racist communist egg. And don’t even get me started on the villains the Doom Patrol fights! Snowflame is the epitome of that; he is what would happen if Tony Montana was a DC supervillain by way of Captain Planet. He is absurd, over-the-top, and so goddamn cool.

It’s very obvious they were trying to do an anti-drug PSA here given the time the comic was released, but it absolutely falls flat on its face when the strawman constructed to be defeated so that the lesson might be dispersed is an absolute lunatic who dresses in colorful spandex and spouts off the most epic lines to ever come out of a villain’s mouth. Everything about him is absurd, but unlike something like Egg Fu he’s absurd in a tasteful and cool way rather than a shockingly racist way. Snowflame is just a dude who snorts cocaine to gain superpowers, it’s as simple as that and yet it’s also completely bonkers.

It’s genuinely unsurprising that this guy managed to get such a massive cult following that he spawned a fanmade webcomic and then got to pop up in the comics again over three decades after his supposed death. And it’s said cult following that has allowed him to pop up time and time again, even getting an appearance in the fourth season of Harley Quinn. I’m sure you can guess that I’m part of that massive cult fanbase, and I can only dream of writing a villain as incredible and grandiose as this drug-addled madman. Infinity/10 isn’t a real score, so he’ll have to settle for a 10/10 instead.

...Oh yeah, remember in the Egg Fu review when I said I wasn’t going to review Hemo-Goblin?

Psycho Analysis: Hemo-Goblin

This is gonna be really short, because there is so little to this guy. He is a one-shot, but boy what a fucking shot he is. Hemo-Goblin is a racist vampire created by South African white supremacists to give members of the New Guardians AIDS. You read that right. This is a racist AIDS vampire.

Now, unlike Egg Fu, who was a horrible racist caricature created from topical anti-communist sentiments of the time, Hemo-Goblin was seemingly created with better intentions. But you know what they say about intentions; the road to Hell is paved with good ones. I get wanting to do a commentary on the AIDS crisis, and I don’t think it’s out of the question for a superhero book to handle such a thing, but maybe having an AIDS-powered vampire give HIV to a Jamaican woman and a gay man isn’t the most tasteful and nuanced way to do this.

Oh, and by the end of his only appearance, he dies of AIDS in jail.

I’m not gonna lie, guys: I kinda love this stupid fucking creature. His weird design, the absurdity of his concept, and the awful execution of his premise makes him memorable for all the wrong reasons, but he’s memorable nonetheless. I think if Snowflame didn’t exist and wasn’t the coolest villain ever, more people would talk about the insanity that is Hemo-Goblin, though having a single appearance before dying and never appearing again doesn’t help his case much. Still, he’s just cazy enough to earn himself a 3.5/10, so he’s got that going for him.

[asmutwriter]

Are You Scared Yet? (Part 2)

DESCRIPTION: You're teacher asks you to paint a mural for Arkham University

WORD COUNT: 2320

From Beginning / Previous / Next / Master List

WARNINGS: Swearing, very brief mentions of sex (virtually non existant), brief mentions of drugs

DISCLAIMERS

This is fiction. Please always talk to your partner before doing anything and make sure they are ok with what you are doing beforehand

"So let me get this straight" you say as you sit at a picnic bench outside. Bag beside you, lunch in front of you. Hope sitting opposite you as she has her fingers interlocked with each other. Resting them near her face as she nods slightly. Picking up a chip as you use it to point at your friend. "You think that Yoda could defeat Iron Man in a one on one fight?"

"That is exactly what I'm saying"

"You realise that Iron Man is a full sized human with a metallic body suit. And Yoda is a 2 foot nothing creature with a stick right?"

"Yet he would still win"

"Absolutely not". She goes to justify her answer more as someone sits beside you. Lucky places her bag onto the table. Shutting her eyes.

"Do either of you have any drugs?" Lucky says as you delve into your bag.

"As in paracetamol or cocaine?"

"I'll take either at this point"

"You have a fun night then last night?" she nods. Opening her eyes as a mischievous grin comes over her face.

"Oh it was very good"

"Gross" you say. Taking out some paracetamol and placing it in front of her. Then grabbing out your water bottle and placing it down too. "Keep the bottle with you ok? I'll just take it later tonight. Assuming I can sleep in my bed tonight?" she chuckles slightly. Placing two tablets on her tongue before taking a few large gulps of water.

"Yeah I guess you can sleep in your own room tonight. Where did you sleep last night?" you point at Hope as she points to herself.

"Managed to find this one who let me stay over. Don't get me wrong, your desk chair is great comfort. But I'd love a bed tonight" the three of you laugh. Hearing a bell go off. You grab your bag, walking to the main building with your friends. Departing ways with Lucky as you and Hope head to art class.

The class goes by as normal. The end of lesson bell rings. "Luna, can I have a chat with you please?" your teacher says. You look at her. Nodding. Hope catches your gaze.

'Lucky bastard' she mouths at you. Causing you to laugh as the class packs up. You stay behind. "I'll see you in your dorm?" she says. You nod. Smiling at her as she walks off. The room empties and Destiny rests against her desk. Your bag sat on one shoulder as you pull it up by the strap.

"You wanted to see me?"

"Yes. Don't worry you're not in trouble or anything". She smiles, folding her arms over herself as she looks at you. "I've been studying your art. You have an extreme talent" she says. "I'd pay good money to own the pieces you make"

"Thank you" you say. A soft, cocky smile on your face as she continues.

"Arkham University wants a mural done. One to show students, teachers, and guests what this uni is all about. Being the art teacher they asked me to do it. However, I think it'd be done a lot better by you". Your mouth drops slightly as you realise what she's asking for you to do. Shock filling you.

"You want me... you want me to paint the mural?" she nods.

"I understand that you have your academics that I must encourage you put first before taking this on. And if you are unable to find the time then I get it. But I think it'll be a great learning experience for you. A great way to show this place and any future employers that you are a true artist".

"When would it need to be done by?"

"Before Halloween would be ideal. But due to your academic studies I would talk to my higher ups and see that it could be pushed to Christmas time". You nod. She clasps her hands in front of her face. Bringing them down as she looks at you. "I will give you until the end of the week to decide"

"No. No yes. I'll do it"

"Are you sure Luna? Don't you want to think about it for a bit longer then five minutes?"

"No. I want to do it. Its what you said - It'll look great on my portfolio" she chuckles slightly. Nodding in agreement.

"I'll let the big boss know" she smiles. Coming over to you as she places her hands either side of your arms. "Thank you"

You leave the classroom. Heading back to your dorm. Going into the room you see your friends there. "You lucky bastard" Hope says. Causing you to laugh as you slump off your bag. Throwing it onto your bed as you sit on the edge of it. Removing your shoes. "So what did she want?"

"She wants me to paint a mural for the university"

"You're shitting me?" Lucky says. You shake your head. Looking at her. "That's excellent news" she comes over. Hugging you close to her. "I'm so happy for you" she says. You hug her back.

"I've got a free day tomorrow so I was going to sketch it tonight and start working on it tomorrow"

"What about our assignment?" Hope speaks up.

"I can do that when it gets dark. I've already started it so I'll finish it tomorrow night" you move away from the hug. Smiling at your concerned friend.

"I've only got one lecture tomorrow so I can join you afterwards?". Lucky says. Causing you to look at her as a grin comes over your face.

"Oh yes!" you say. Grabbing out a sketch book as the three of you continue chatting, smiling, and laughing as the night goes on.

The next day comes about. You manage to sketch out a brief idea of the mural. When you wake up Lucky has gone to her lecture. So you get up, get dressed, and have something to eat. Heading to Hopes dorm room, thankfully its on the same floor as you. Knocking on it as she answers. Still in her pyjamas. She squints at you through tired eyes.

"Why are you up so early?"

"Its 9:30. You should be happy I didn't come round when I actually woke up" she turns. Going over to her coffee machine as you go into her room. "I woke up at 7"

"Jesus are you ill or something?"

"Nope. Just don't sleep much" you smile, looking around as she pours herself a drink. "I went to see Destiny this morning. Get her to check over my sketch before I painted it. She's given me the go ahead. Told me where to paint. So I'm here to grab you". She lets out an annoyed grumble. Rubbing her face dramatically with both her hands.

"Ok. Let me shower quickly and I'll come" she grabs a pile of clothes from the floor. Heading to the en-suite bathroom. Hearing the shower start to run a few seconds later. You sit on the chair, looking at the picture frame she has on her desk. Of her, you assume her mum, and a dog. Smiling as you look at it. It wasn't long before she comes out. Towel drying her hair as she sits on the bed. Putting on some heeled boots as she chucks her towel down.

"You ready?" she says. You nod. Standing as you both head out. Finding the wall in question. You stand and look at it. Hands on your hips as you figure out the first move. Getting out a white paint - it being an easy colour to paint over if needed. Starting to outline the image. Hope taking out a blanket. Lying it onto the floor as she lies onto it. Putting some sunglasses on. Her hands resting on her abdomen as you paint.

It's what you enjoyed about your friendship with her. You didn't need to chat with each other to enjoy the others presence. You could both do your own thing and be content with the silent company. So you painted and she sunbathed. Hours must've past. Hearing a voice behind you. Feeling thirsty you turn. Going and sitting cross legged next to your friend on the piece of area she'd claimed. Grabbing your bag and taking out a tin of coke. Opening it she seems to be drawn out of her sunbathing. Resting up on her arms as she looks at you.

"Shall I go get us some lunch?" she says. You take a sip of your drink. Bringing it down and nodding. She stands up. "Whatcha want?"

"I'll come with you"

"No. Stay here and rest". You roll your eyes at her before smiling. She moves her sunglasses to the top of her head.

"Chips. Cheesy chips" you say. She nods. Turning as she saunters away. She always walked with such purpose. You sip your drink. Shutting your eyes. Enjoying the sun on your face.

"Holy shit" you hear. Opening your eyes, seeing Lucky with Hope. "That's looking so good Luna" you smile. Hope handing you your food as they both sit down with their respective meals.

"Thanks. Just waiting for it to dry before starting to add colour"

You eat and chat throughout lunch. Getting up and going over to the picture. Continuing to paint as they chat. Involving you in their conversation. Time passes quickly. Hope says something. But you're to in the moment for you to register what she says. Jumping as she touches your shoulder. Turning you look at her.

"Hmm?"

"I'm getting cold now that the suns off of this patch. We're going back to the dorm. Are you gonna join?" you look back at the picture then at your friends.

"I've just got this one small bit left to do. Then I can leave it to dry. I'll be... an hour I reckon"

"Ok Miss Workaholic" you smile.

"I would hug you" Lucky says "but you are literally coated in paint". You laugh. Turning back to the picture.

"I'll have a shower when I get back. I'll be quick I promise"

"Yeah yeah" they both say "see you in a bit". Walking off as you continue.

You stand back. Admiring your work in the quickly fading sun. Checking your hand for any wet paint before wiping your brow with the back of your hand. Placing your hands on your hips as you nod in approval.

"You're out awfully late" a voice says. Making you jump. Again. Turning you see Professor Crane.

"Do you feel the need to make me jump every time you see me?" he smiles. Not denying or confirming your rhetorical question.

"Shouldn't you be back at your dorm?"

"Its not that late" your smiling face turns to one of more seriousness. "How late is it...?". He looks at his watch. Rolling the sleeve of his blazer slightly to check.

"Just gone 7:30"

"Shit" he raises a quizzical eyebrow. Amusement on his face at your obvious disheveled nature. "I told my roommate that I'd be back in an hour. 3 hours ago" he chuckles. "Art takes time. Time that I always miscalculate". He tilts his head. Looking at your work so far.

"Destiny asked you, correct?" you nod. "You must be very good for her to ask you. Shes very particular with her artists and art style"

"Really?" you look at him as he continues to look at the mural. Head titled upwards slightly. "She always seems so relaxed". He laughs softly. Shaking his head as he looks at you.

"All an act. Shes very anal about things". You chuckle.

"I can tell you do psychology" he tilts his head to the side at your comment. "Just casually dropping a psychological term into your everyday speak". He smiles

"Yes. Well... It comes naturally". You go over to your bag. Wrapping up the paint brushes in plastic and putting them into your rucksack. "I'm surprised you know that terminology"

"I studied psychology and sociology at school"

"Yet you study art here?" you nod. "What made you take that drastic change?"

"I enjoy being creative. Making art through shapes, patterns, colours. Can't do that in psychology. Psychology has no real expressive nature. Its a fascinating topic. I loved studying it. I still read books about different experiments and outcomes of events. But this-" you motion at the wall. "This is what I was meant to do". He nods. Watching you like you were an actor on a stage. You run a hand through your hair. Regretting it as dried paint flecks stain the strands. Causing him to laugh softly. You smile slightly at him. Picking up your rucksack.

"I really should be getting back to my roommate. She'll be worried about me otherwise"

"Can I just say-" speaking before you turn. You look at him. His glasses frame dulling the blueness of his eyes as he looks at you. "I have a lot of interesting books about psychology if you'd like to borrow them to read". You blink at him. Unsure of how to answer. "I have a lot of a higher level then what you would've read at school that you are welcome to"

"Seriously?" he nods. A soft smiling tugging at his lips as yours widens.

"They're in my classroom. I have lessons running quite late tomorrow so lets say... 6. Come round and I'll lend them to you. Assuming you don't have a class then?" you shake your head.

"No my class finishes at 4 so that's perfect timing" he smiles.

"I'll let you get off now. Can't have your friends worrying about you"

"Thank you professor Crane" you smile at him. Adjusting your bag on your shoulder before heading back to your dorm room. You're friend greeting you as you pop your bag down onto the bed. Heading into the shower to get rid of some of the paint from you.

Previous / Next

[macchiatosdumptruck]

I often wonder what would have happened if Daniel and Terry had reunited in the 90s and actually talked about everything that happened in '85. Terry could have apologized, and they might have spent some time together. When Terry shows up with Kreese at the dojo that day in season 4 everyone expects Daniel to hate him. Instead, they start talking—and maybe even flirting a bit—reminiscing about the '90s and sharing some laughs. They could walk away from Kreese and Johnny, enjoying each other's company. In that moment, Kreese would be left thinking, "What the heck? This isn’t how this was supposed to go!"

As much as I love 90's silverusso and Tig and Ralph, I personally see Terry still being too deep into cocaine, hurting from his friend breakup with Kreese, and Daniel would be in the middle of his "hoe phase." ( Traumatized from his first male crush having been Like That, and just the 80's in general, trying to identify/understand/control his sexual identity) for it to work.

That being said, there's no reason this can't exist in AU land. (But then they wouldn't have that s4 backyard moment you describe)

I do very much enjoy the idea of Terry, as some sort of move to prove his own newfound morals to himself, reaches out to Daniel in an attempt to apologize, all 12 steps style. Convinced that whatever was inside of him that was making him rot was all cut out with all the yoga, and rehab, and therapy, he would track Daniel down and watch him from a distance, unsure of how to approach.

(also, still holding onto that obsessive, possessive thing inside of him, but knowing, logically, he shouldn't, can't act on it as New Terry, he knows this gives him the advantage)

He waits until something comes up that puts Daniel at a disadvantage, in need of help, with his guard down. Not for anything untoward, mind you. Terry just wants to be sure he'll have the time and opportunity to make sure his apology is thoroughly heard. It's an important step of the healing process.

When, for whatever reason, Terry swoops in, much like that fateful day in Miyagi's back yard with Mike, Daniel is too shocked to react at first.

Every alarm inside of him is going off, telling him that he needs to get away. But Terry had strength, and reach, and determination, and he pins Daniel. Daniel panics, sure something terrible is going to happen but not knowing what.

And then Terry grabs his face with his hands (a hint of that past rough treatment still lingering) and turns Daniel's face towards him so he can finally say -

"I'm sorry."

I imagine at first Daniel would trust him about as far as he can throw him. And Terry would get impatient, but see the need to play by Daniel's rules.

He's a better person now, after all. He genuinely does want to repent, to have the light of Daniel back in his life. And so he backs away, keeping a respectful distance.

He's never too far though, and as the days and weeks go by and Daniel, with his loving, forgiving heart sees that Terry is (more or less) respecting his wish for space (after all, it wasn't Terry who was being sent to keep an eye on the boy Terry has men for that) Daniel starts to slowly lower his guard.

He remembers the highs, the adrenaline rush, and how Terry made him feel horribly alive. He remembers what he tried to forget, which is that he had enjoyed his time with the man, even when it hurt, right up until that moment in the club.

Terry isn't a patient man, but he uses every iota of it that resides within his body because he knows the reward will be worth it. He knew Danny boy better than the boy had liked to admit. Better than Terry had expected to.

He was a stubborn spitfire but if he was handled correctly, he always did give in.

[salllzy]

The meeting of Justice and Nature #4

Alastor knew what was going on in Hell, so far the angels had dug themselves a nice grave and Sarah was playing her part rather well. He did feel sorry for Emily, his daughter-in-law looked as if she wanted to be anywhere else. Which was understandable, Sarah had his temper after all. However, they wouldn't need to resort to such tactics if Heaven had listened to them in the beginning. But they hadn't. Alastor hummed as he followed his target, a brute of a man who had escaped any form of punishment by bribing the police, judges and prosecution. But he would deal with them later, right now? He had a predator to hunt down and remove. The sad sack of shit didn't deserve to live. He hummed and twirled his cane as he followed his target into the bathrooms of a gentlemen's club. He already knew how he was going to get rid of him, the man was known for his overindulgence of certain things. Other than young boys that was. So injecting a lethal dosage of cocaine into him? Wasn't going to raise any red flags for anyone. Alastor smiled as he looked at the slumped body, he would raise the alarm when he was safely away, an anonymous tip would be good enough. Then he would turn his attention to those who were supposed to be upholding justice. There was a special place in Hell for them. He was the Angel of Justice, he wasn't good or evil, he simply was. Justice was to punish the guilty and protect the innocent and should justice not be delivered? Then he turned into vengeance. Which is what happened in this case. Not that he was complaining, it was always fun and entertaining when he got to hunt down a few scum. Alastor was well aware that he wasn't like amongst the heavenly Courts, he had killed a fair few angels in his time and they were unable to stop him. Not even Sera and her precious rules. He knew that he needed to make an appearance soon, no doubt those of the Heavenly Courts would be wondering where he was. Those who knew him or had worked with him before were well aware that they couldn't force him to do anything that he didn't want to do. It was something that irritated Sera to no end and why he kept doing it. ---- Alastor lurked in the shadows as Micheal tore into Sera and it wasn't just Micheal either. He had to give his daughter credit, she knew how to get others to her side. Using facts and logic made it difficult to argue with her at the best of times, coupled with the evidence that she liked to collect? It was nearly impossible to win an argument against her. He was so proud of her. "Well, this looks like a party." His eyes landed on Emily who was clutching Sarah's blouse and his daughter? She looked as if she was one step away from erasing Sera from existence. Alastor sent a withering glare towards Sera as he made his way to Emily and Sarah, a vicious rumble echoed in the room, she had gone from the realms of being displeased and annoyed to angry, so very angry. The stench of ozone filled the air and Alastor could feel the small tremors under his feet, she was holding onto her temper by a thin thread. One that could snap at any given moment. There were very few things that could anger her to this point, in fact, they could be counted on one hand and there would be fingers left over. Then he saw it, a vivid red hand mark on Emily's face. It was far too big to be Sarah's, not that his daughter would ever lay a hand on her wife, Sarah would soon skin herself alive than harm Emily. His eyes bled green as he looked at Sera. The Seraphim didn't look sorry, she held her head high as she was given a dressing down by Gabriel and Raphael, neither of the Archangels were being gentle. It didn't take him very long to figure out just what had happened. Then before anyone could say and do anything, his sword was rammed straight through Sera's mouth. The Seraphim hadn't seen it coming.

[diazsdimples]

Fic Writing Review 2023 🥳

Words and Fics

222,730 words published to AO3

1 fandom (9-1-1)

Most recent drop: sugar and spice and all that smells nice (Buddie | 6.3k | E)

Longest fic: Buck's Baby (By Accident) (Buddie | 119k | G)

Top Fics By Kudos

Buck's Baby By Accident (Buddie | 119k | G)

Fucking Finally (Finally Fucking) (Buddie | 3.9k | E)

Burning with Need (Buddie | 3.8k | E)

First Words (Buddie | 2k | G)

In sickness and in health (but mostly in sickness) (Buddie | 3.7k | G)

My Fandom Events in 2023

Didn't do any! I joined the fandom in June and didn't write anything until July 🙃

Upcoming Events and Projects for 2024

This all depends on how many babies need delivering next year ngl, and how much of the year I spend on call but here's the WIPs I have so far!

To finish/publish:

With you I'm home - I quoted 20 chapters for this because Buck's Baby was also 20 chapters but I am 100% playing this by air. In this fic, we see Buck and Eddie embarking on their first year of marriage. They have a 2 year old son (Aidan) and Christopher, who is 14. This fic will show them navigating parenting a boisterous toddler and a sassy teenager while they begin their journey to having a new baby.

Cat Fic!! - this has been sitting in my WIPs folder for months now and I haven't had the beans to write it recently! Buck has adopted a cat with a curious name that brings a whole load of feelings to the forefront of his brain (is he saying I love you to the wrong Eddie?) and also provides some excellent material to fuck with his friends.

AUs that live in my head rent free

GTA AU - Listen I know this sounds weird, BUT, Buck and Eddie are heads of rival motorcycle gangs and constantly engage in turf wars. They realise they have the same product dealer for their cocaine lockups, who has been selling them dodgy product, resulting in loss of revenue for both men. They come together to confront the man realise they work extremely well together and who knows, maybe rival MC gang members can fall in love!

Piano Teacher!Buck, Parent!Eddie and Student!Chris - this was inspired by my Musician AU Play me like a fiddle, and was vaguely encouraged on Ao3 by @theotherbuckley, and will be a oneshot of Eddie coming to Buck after being referred to him by Christopher's physical therapy. Buck is more than happy to take Christopher on as a student is fast delighted by his constant, bubbly optimism. Eddie watches as Buck teaches his son and watches Christopher's confidence in himself build and realises, fuck, he's slowly falling in love with his son's teacher.

His Dark Materials AU - Buck finds himself in possession of an alethiometer and the more questions he asks of it, trying to figure out it's true meaning, the more he finds himself being drawn towards a dark, mysterious man he's noticed hanging around the college lately. Buck's daemon is instantly drawn to Eddie's daemon and the two find themselves unlikely friends, embarking on a quest to discover what it is the alethiometer is trying to warn them about.

Single Parents AU - Buck is the single father of two daughters and has just joined the 118 and is struggling to find his place. He meets another single father at his daughter's school in the pick up line one day and Eddie reveals he's training at the LAFD but struggling with childcare while he does it. Buck suggests they combine childcare and offers to help Eddie train, and even gets him a position in the 118 when Eddie graduates. How long will they coparent their three kids before they realise they've got it bad for each other?

Misc. ideas that haven't quite developed into fics yet but exist!

Magic Au - Buck and Eddie both have the power to control their auras (which have a colour and scent specific only to them) and go through rigorous training to enable them to save the earth from the Elder Race threatening to take over (inspired by Michael Scott's Secrets of the Immortal Nicholas Flamel)

Detectives AU - I've been watching too many Scandinavian crime shows and want to write Buddie solving a grisly murder

Chances are I'll come up with more over the summer!

Tags and rules under the cut

Rules: Feel free to show whatever stats you have. Only want to show Ao3 stats? Rock on. Want to include some quantitative info instead of stats? Please do this. Want to change how yours is presented? Absolutely do that. Would rather eat glass than do this? Please don’t eat glass but don’t feel like you have to do this either.

Tagged by @jesuisici33 and @hippolotamus thank you my loves!

(no pressure) tagging @malewifediaz @theplaceyoustillrememberdreaming @theotherbuckley @disasterbuckdiaz @thewolvesof1998 @callmenewbie @cal-daisies-and-briars @daffi-990 @monsterrae1 @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels @rainbow-nerdss @wikiangela @steadfastsaturnsrings @spagheddiediaz @eddiebabygirldiaz @watchyourbuck @loserdiaz @smilingbuckley @fortheloveofbuddie @spotsandsocks (ignore if you've already done it!)

[bullet-prooflove]

Sunglasses - Neron 'Creeper' Vargas x Reader

A companion piece to A Perfect Moment

Tagging: @anime-weeb-4-life @est1887 @mysoulisasunflower @drabbles-mc @alexxavicry @im-just-a-mississippi-girl

You still have his sunglasses; Neron realises that the next day when he’s preparing for a run up to Stockton. It’s a fourteen hour round trip and it’s a fucking bright outside, so bright it fucking stings his eyes when he steps outside of his house. The light sensitivity is one of the things that comes with recovery, the long-term cocaine usage has damaged his eyes, not enough for it to cause any real problems, just enough to give him a fucking migraine if he doesn’t shield them.

He thinks it may be too early to drop by the tattoo parlour but he swings by anyway just in case. The door sign says closed but he can tell you’re in, he can hear the music through the door when he raps his knuckles on the glass underneath the gold cursive writing.

The song is something by Lindsey Stirling, he wouldn’t expect anything less. You have that vibe. He’s thinking about the cover she did of Radioactive. The hair, the eye makeup, the energy. Your implement of choice a pencil instead of a violin.

You open the door with a smile that makes his heart rate increase, he swears it gets wider when you see it’s him. He can’t help but break into a grin because your sunniness is infectious. He doesn’t think you realise that you have this ability to put people at ease, it must serve you well with your clients.

The bell above the door jingles as he closes it behind him. It’s the first time he’s been in your shop and he finds himself drawn to the artwork on the walls, beautiful sweeping images with stunning flourishes, highlighted with colour. He thinks this is how you see the world, in shades of vibrancy. It’s a contrast with the sleek darkwood furniture. He runs his hand over the top of a sideboard, admiring the staining of the wood. It’s old, an antique he suspects, possibly an heirloom. He can almost feel the history thrumming through the piece.

You’re in the middle of setting up for your first client but you pause to watch him. There’s something about Neron, his mannerisms, his interest in the world around him, it makes him a joy to be around. He seems grounded, connected to the space around him, living each and every single moment. You admire a person like that, someone who knows exactly who he is and exists purely in the present.

“I’ve got some time if you want to get in the chair.” You tease him, jerking your head towards the seat.

He looks at it almost regretfully. There’s an intimacy when you tattoo someone’s skin, a connection that’s forged, it’s fleeting, a matter of hours but it’s there. The act itself, of committing a piece of someone’s soul onto their flesh is spiritual in a way. People tell you their darkest secrets in the chair, their woes, their happiness. It’s a confessional for those who don’t feel welcome in church.

“I wish, I could.”

He means it you can tell. He’s already a stunning collection of artwork, you know every tattoo has a story, it shows an aspect of your history and personality. You want to ask him about his, you want to trace over each and every piece and learn everything there is to know about Neron Vargas.

“Next time maybe.” You tell him before picking up his sunglasses from the counter you’d set them on. You’d worn them in this morning, a reminder of the man you had met yesterday, the one that made you lose track of the time, that made you laugh, that seemed to get exactly where you were coming from when you explained how you worked. “I’m guessing you came by for these.”

He looks at the sunglasses in your outstretched hand. He doesn’t want to take them; he wants them to be a gift but the truth is he needs them. They’re tailored for his particular type of problem, a similar one to what he thinks you’ve had too.

“My eyes.” He explains gesturing to his face. “I get light sensitive sometimes. It’s an aftereffect…”

He trails off before he can say the words. He’s upfront and honest about his addiction issues but he knows how people perceive it, he’s not a safe bet in the long term, at least that’s how his girlfriends have seen it in the past.

“…of substance abuse.” You finish for him, and he nods, averting his gaze to the ornate panelling of the reception desk. He doesn’t want to see the disappointment in your eyes, the pity, he knows he’s fucked this up with you.

“Seven years.” You say into the air between you. “I’ve been sober seven years.”

He tilts his head towards you, meeting your gaze. He doesn’t know what he expects to see because you’ve surprised him. You seem like you have your shit together, he assumed you always had.

“Alcohol.” You tell him. “I used to get so fucked up…”

You don’t finish the sentence and he gets it. It’s a bad place to go back to and he doesn’t want you to feel like you have to tell him anything. You don’t owe him anything for his disclosure.

“Cocaine.” He says, his hand rubbing over the back of his neck. “I’d have a drink, and then a line… Now I don’t do either.”

“Shit, well I guess the both of us are the boring ones at a party.” You say and he laughs because fuck if that isn’t true. He prefers to sit and play cards these days.

“I’d love to stick around.” He tells you earnestly, his sunglasses clasped in his hand. “Shoot the shit some more…”

“But you have stuff to do. I get it.”

And you do, you have a client turning up in thirty minutes and you still need to print off the design onto transfer paper. As much as you would love to prolong this conversation, you need to get moving too. You pluck one of your cards from the top of the reception desk and scribble something on the back before handing it to him.

“My private number.” You tell him. “In case you wanna shoot the shit again.”

He looks down at it and smiles, his thumb tracing over the numbers like they’re braille.

“I’m away in Stockton for a couple of days.” He tells you, tucking the card into the pocket of his kutte. “But I’d really like to see you again when I get back.”

“Send me a text or call me.” You say. “We’ll work something out.”

“Ok.” He says, his cheeks colouring just a little as he toys with his sunglasses.

It’s fucking adorable.

You watch through the window as he leaves, his thighs straddle that bike before he pulls out his phone and then your card, thumb sweeping over the touch screen.

Your cell chimes from behind you, you pick it up as you hear the roar of an engine outside before it fades off into the distance.

My number :) N x

Love Creeper? Get added to his tag list!

Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

[lala1267]

No Escape Now.

The room spun around slowly as she struggled to keep her eyelids from closing shut. The liquor slowly seeped into her brain. The man before her had a mischievous smile on his blurred face. His mouth moved, but no words escaped. The silence was deafening. His distorted face contracted until his eyes became visible. The fury and anger in his raven eyes were disguised by the flirtatious grin he maintained. His big hand reached down to grip her soft thigh that quivered slightly. It slowly moved up until his hand layed on her g-string that was soaking more by the minute. A smile formed on her ruby-red lips as her hudded eyes struggled to stay open. His other hand played with her boobs that were covered by the short pink dress. Her arousal grew as his ego got the best of him. She used all of her strength to lift her arm up towards his face. She needed to feel him, feel his love that was non-existent. She craved an ounce of true love. Her hopes were suddenly crushed to dust when his large hand landed on her face, leaving a strong sting. Her eyes widened in shock. Her now swollen cheek was throbbing. She reached her hand up to cup her red cheek. She could feel the handprint Ingraved into it. A sea of tears flooded her face as his words became audible. His face scrunched whilst his body towered over her defenceless self.

"You really thought that you were getting it after you made me wait for my food. Whore!"

He yelled as the vibration in his raspy voice echoed throughout the dim room. He stomped away into another room. She struggled to keep her balance as she thought the liquor and built up emotions. She was confused but not surprised. He usually had temper tantrums, but this one was uncalled for. She turned her caked-in makeup face to look at the reflection in the glass window. She saw a hopeless girl who was devoted to a man who couldn't give a shit about her. She was too far gone to be saved. She glared down at the veiw with her watery doll eyes as the city lights stared back up at her.

The clock chimed, waking her up from a long needed sleep. She slowly sat up off the cold floor. Her eyes squinted as she looked around the room. The throbbing in her head grew worse as the hangover began. She heard her heart beat against her ribcage as she heard footsteps behind her. She closed her bloodshot eyes tightly as she curled up into a ball, shielding her powerless figure from the beating she thought she was about to endure. Her heart skipped a few beats as she held her breath. But to her suprise, the footsteps passed her and carried on until she heard a door slam shut. She gradually unwrapped herself as her eyelids lifted from her glassy eyes. She bit her nails as she scanned the empty room. He was gone. Her fear died down as the feeling of relief filled her drained grey heart. She lifted her body up from the cold floor before looking around for him. He had left the apartment. She let out a deep sigh before bringing her hand up to her chest. The feeling of her bare feet on the chilly floor sent shivers up her spine.

Her man, her master, was a hypocritical narcissistic bastard. He was allowed to fuck as many sluts as he wanted but if she did so much as even lay her eyes on another man she would receive a painful beating. He went out every night, but that was alright because no matter what he did, she would always be by his side. She loved him unconditionally even if he layed his hands on her. It was like her name was engraved in the back of his cocaine heart, whilst all of the other girl's names were neatly placed on the front. His black heart overcast her innocent heart. A boy is a gun. If his bitch flew to high he would shoot her down. She had been shot down too many times at the beginning of their relationship, but over time, she learned to stay in her place. His manipulative words would pull her back into his arms.

"I only do it cause I love you. I would never hurt you intentionally."

His empty words would echo around her hollow head until she believed it. She never would have thought that her feelings could get thrown in the air like they were meaningless. The thought of her with somebody else, he didn't like that. He fucking hated her, but he wanted her. He loved the power and glory he felt when he was dominant. He was bad at keeping his emotions bubbled, his anger would overflow. She was like a puppet to him, a ragdoll even. Crazy who makes her the happiest can make her the saddest.

"Actually, if you even consider leaving, I will stop breathing. I will find you and fuck up your life. I'll make ya disappear. Life without you has no gaddamn meaning. So don't even think about leaving, cause ya won't get very far."

His sharp words lingered in her heart. He would pop out of the dark to find her and do harm to her if she dared to step out of the door that separated her from his punches and reality. He hit her and it felt like a kiss, it felt like true love.

"Come on baby, I still love you. But if I see you with another man, I just might have to kill him, and you too."

But she still cared for him. Because he still loved her, right?

She would sit in the empty apartment. Patiently waiting for his return. A Polaroid sat in her hands. The both of them were hugging in the picture. She stroked it with her fingers as all of the memories flooded her foggy brain. The times that they were in love, real love. A single tear ran down her cheek.

"I wait for you."

She whispered with her shaky breath.

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

📓 <333

Okay back to answering these

I have this one very sprawling, episodic fic I call the Peter Parker Roommates AU that I deeply adore that’s basically based on the idea that, when the three Peters hugged at the end of multiverse, they got kind of glitched together and gained the ability to hop into each others universes.

They discover this fact entirely by accident after the entire matter is settled, everyone’s been sent back to their home universes and forgotten Tom Holland!Peter.

WHAT THEY SHOULD DO:

Tell the fucking wizards

WHAT THEY DO NOT DO:

okay so the thing is

They know, okay? They know that this is probably “cosmically dangerous” and “endangering the fabric of reality” or whatever. They all don’t want to rip a hole in the space time continuum that destroys all of existence.

But there’s a very compelling counterpoint to not telling the wizards.

And that’s that all of them are homeless and rent is very very expensive in every version of New York City and it is very very hard to get a roommate when you’re secretly fucking Spider-Man. They have never had such an unparalleled opportunity to split rent three ways before.

the thing is that apparently changing the fates of people who were “important” to your “past” may or may not change the world you come back to. 2/3 Spider-Men did not know they would be homeless coming out the other end of this and are very unprepared. The last 1/3 only had like 7 minutes of forewarning and is likewise caught off guard.

THE SPIDERMEN AND THEIR RESPECTIVE LIVING SITUATIONS:

Tom Holland!Peter (“Pete”): cold, homeless, alone, and sad. Has no idea if he still legally exists or not

Tobey McGuire!Peter (“Peter B.”): see the thing is that he’s been figuring things out and on/off with Mary Jane for a long time and when he left his universe last he and MJ were actually making a pretty good go at long term domesticity and had an apartment together and were really happy. He gets back and they’re very much off again and not on speaking terms, apparently, for reasons that he can’t figure out because they’re not on speaking terms. He has no idea where he lives. He cannot find it. He has tried. Where are all of his things. Currently has the clothes on his back and nothing else.

Andrew Garfield!Peter (“Peter P.”): not technically homeless but seriously considering it as a preferable alternative. The thing is that when he last left his universe he was living on his own, having moved out of Aunt Mays house for her safety and sanity. The universe he returned to was not that. He’s back in his childhood bedroom and apparently in this universe he was fighting a crime ring he was not fighting when he left because his closet is full of cocaine and he does not know why or where he got it or what mob he stole it from. It’s just. It’s an enormous amount of cocaine. He can’t remember what to do with it. He needs to get out of his aunts house and take his cocaine with him.

Anyway they realize that Peter B.’s aunt may never lost her house (a de-Goblin’d Norman Osborn paid it off and refused to accept any reimbursement whatsoever in complete guilt over what happened with Pete’s May). However, she is the oldest out of any May by a lot and needs to be in full time assisted living care home (also forcibly paid for by Norman Osborn for reasons that. Yeah. Would not explain. Makes sense why now.) and the 3 Peters decide to move in together at Peter B’s home and split living costs from there.

Honestly it’s too sprawling of a fic to adequately summarize so here are the highlights:

Peter B’s universe has a long time Daredevil that he’s absolute best friends with and neither of them will admit that they’re friends. They’re in a “purely professional” relationship except they like send each other recipes and go antiquing together on the weekends. Both of them fucking hate their universe’s Avengers, who just cropped up.

Okay it’s not that they HATE them it’s just that they hate them. The thing is that this universes avengers didn’t get the hard launch of an alien invasion. Peter B’s universe had Just Spider-Man for a very long time and then Daredevil and Luke Cage and Jessica Jones and other street folk popped up and now the government is trying to roll out their own superhero team. The thing is they don’t have a super large amount to work with since there’s no alien invasion and people fucking love Spider-Man and other solo heroes so they just play the team angle really hard. The government basically launches a PR campaign that’s about how superhero teams are inherently more trustworthy and have more accountability because you have them keeping each other in check. They’re trying to rope in Spider-Man because he’s got the most street cred out of anyone like just join a TEAM get support from a TEAM and it’s just. It’s so annoying and inconvenient. Leave him BE.

Daredevil is having similar problems and is similarly angry about it. He’s not joining a team with tony stark out of all the godforsaken people. Get off of his rooftop and stop trying to recruit him.

They decide “fuck it” and to form a “team” with each other so that way they can say LOOK we have a TEAM we did the TEAM thing leave us alone now. What’s their team name? Uhhh… red. Team red. Because they both are wearing red. Leave them alone now.

This leads to some random guy named Deadpool taking out billboards and television ads begging to be made a part of their team. They don’t know who he is. He left a muffin basket nailed to the Peters front door with a knife as a bribe/for your consideration gift. How does this man know where they live and who is he. Anyway the muffins were fantastic

(Pete during Peter Bs biweekly bitchfest about the avengers: hey it’s probably a good idea you’re not teaming up with them because shield was secretly nazis in my universe

Peter B, slamming his hand on the counter: I KNEW IT)

(Peter B’s Matt (“Mr. Murdock”) waking Pete up in the middle of the night: what do you mean they were secretly nazi’s

Pete, violently realizing that his attorney was daredevil the whole fucking time: oh I’m gonna torture him with that *cue three months straight where he makes a bunch of lawyer jokes around his universe’s daredevil to drive him mad with paranoia*)

Mike Murdock shenanigans when Pete’s Matt gets caught as Daredevil, arrested, and put on trial and Pete, who has decided he owes him a life debt for his help when he was in the hot seat, concoctes a wild scheme where they claim it was his twin brother Mike Murdock all along. Forces Mr. Murdock to go along as their “Mike” by promising to find a way to reveal SHIELD as secretly nazis, because they’re so fucking annoying and Mr. Murdock wants public humiliation and pain for the inconvenience of having to deal with them

When they do reveal them as secretly nazis they do it through Peter B’s universe’s Bucky, who ends up moving to Pete’s universe in a sort of recovery/witness relocation thing. He moves in with Pete’s Matt (“Matt”), who hates this fact. Leave his home.

Peter B’s universe’s Steve hurdles into depression when it’s discovered that he was working for Nazis and Bucky doesn’t want to see him (he immigrated to another universe and they were planning to tell 0 people that fact) and keeps moping where Peter B has to see it, ruining his now AMAZING mood now that the avengers and shield were publicly ruined. So he drops him off at Matt’s apartment. Matt hates this fact. Leave his home.

This Steve decides that immigration to another universe is the only and best option and becomes a barista and decides his fake name is going to be his favorite character from his favorite book from the 40s that was sadly mostly unknown. So he goes around as Frodo the Barista now. What do you mean that book is popular here. He can’t change it again.

He fights crime as a vigilante in Brooklyn with his Bucky in his free time. Matt is frothing with rage that this is his problem and demands Pete do something about it. Pete starts spreading the rumor that this is the ghost of Captain America and Bucky Barnes haunting Brooklyn, obviously. He is aware that his universes Bucky is still alive. People believe it anyway. Now there’s ghost tours in Brooklyn to see the ghost of someone who’s still fucking alive.

(Matt: I need them out of my home I can’t take this anymore

Foggy, squinting at him: you fucked both of them didn’t you

Matt: that is BESIDES THE POINT)

Peter P’s universe is the only one without a daredevil and he is SO UPSET. He loves daredevils. He wants one so so bad. This is so unfair.

Then law student Matt Murdock starts dicking around in black sweatpants and Peter P could not be more excited. Oh god oh fuck yes yes yes yes it’s happening

His Matt is deeply confused as to how he already caught Spider-Man’s attention and doesn’t want to team up with him. He’s just cleaning up his neighborhood. This isn’t a Thing he doesn’t have a superhero name. When Peter p insists on knowing who he is he just replies “I am a Man of Justice”

Peter P is so fucking psyched and blinded that he got a dramatic theatre kid Matt Murdock that he forgets himself and decides “I’m gonna call you MJ. You look like an M name” and then has a panic attack because BOTH the other Peters fell in love with an MJ. Did he jinx this cosmically?? Oh god

The thing is that Peter P’s universe didn’t get an Avengers, they got a fantastic four. Peter P is in a very unwilling and one sided rivalry with Johnny Storm on account that Johnny Storm keeps trying to rival him and he’s like. Fucking 17. Peter P is an adult man in grad school he can’t, this is, it’s just embarrassing is what it is. However Pete fucking betrayed him by dating Johnny Storm (re: had a star crossed and doomed to fail genuine relationship with him that helped him recover from losing MJ and Ned and crashed and failed due to the fact that Reed Richards was chasing the multiverse and Pete decided he couldn’t risk what he had with the Peters after losing his entire family to the multiverse last time. They broke up and both were devastated)

(Peter P, under the impression he has Big Brother Authority, which does not exist: I FORBID IT

Pete: I do not care man

Peter B, has a headache: let’s all take a step back

Peter P: he’s, he’s immature and bad and always dating new people every week and and he is trying to steal your sweetness

Pete: *stares at him* *ungodly screeching*)

The thing is that the Johnny Storm led to an agreement where they could not date each others friends/enemies multiversal counterparts because it got weird fast. What do you MEAN that your MJ is your Daredevil Pete has ONE FRIEND IN HIS ENTIRE UNIVERSE AND THATS HIS MATT PETER P CANNOT DATE HIS MATT

This leads to a period of time where Pete insists upon living out of a little hobo sack in his universe, which leads to an even more embarrassing period of time where Peter B is aggressively trying to hunt him down and force him to talk about his feelings, which is the one thing Pete is refusing to do. Peter B refuses to let Pete (who is in his self destructive loner phase, they all have one, it’s a Peter Parker thing) live alone. He needs a roommate who can patch him up or peter b will fucking web them together. Pete says “fine” and gets a roommate. The roommate is the Punisher. He is the only one who thinks this is a solution. Except Frank is weirdly good with angst riddled seventeen year olds and pete gets more emotional actualization and moves back in with the other Peters

Peter Bs JJJ has actual journalistic integrity and some modicum of concern for this random teenager that his photographer took in and thinks he just needs stability and structure and support in life to succeed. He keeps trying to be a mentor figure in Pete’s life who is simply not having it.

He eventually ends up in multiversal shenanigans and discovers Pete’s version of him, who he decides is the Evil Version of him who sells fucking scam multivitamins and slanders a perfectly nice young man. His thing was different they’re not talking about that anyway he has to kill the version of him without journalistic integrity

Peter B, could not be more tired: *deep breath*

Mr. Murdock is in a long standing polycule with his Karen and his Foggy and the thing is that both his Karen and his Foggy have baby fever but can’t adopt because their lives are hostile to children’s continued survival and he decides that what he really needs for them is a durable orphan who can be their like, pseudo child and he can be like the weird uncle to. He just sort of shoves Pete in their path, who fucking owes him for the entire thing with Mike Murdock, and it’s really very extremely awkward when they figure out he was doing it to help Karen and foggy get out their latent parenting instincts. Pete feels violated.

There’s this entire subplot with scarlet witch and multiversal versions of her orphaned twins trying to find a version of their mom (who died in Peter B’s universe) that they can be with that would take too long to get into but whenever they misbehave on the quest to find Pete’s scarlet witch and see if she ever considered motherhood they threaten to send them back to their home universe to be Mr Murdock’s durable orphans

There’s a lot more but this is very long already

[jannwrites]

tv show ask meme : GUILLERMO DEL TORO’S CABINET OF CURIOSITIES (2022). (2/2)

a selection of lines from the horror anthology cabinet of curiosities. modified slightly for rp purposes.

PICKMAN'S MODEL.

behind everything beautiful lies the dark.

beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but what about the horror?

you can't rush perfection.

all i said is i don't see what the fuss is about.

i just fail to see what's so interesting about them.

i think the rats got to her.

these are...powerful. the darkness, the ugliness, the corruption.

we cannot let sympathy or altruism shield us from finding the truths of this world.

sometimes, when i'd wake in the night, i'd hear them through the floor.

what is happening to me?

i mean, you knew how important this was to me.

i don't even recognize you anymore.

what is art in this modern world without truth?

i think we need to give them some names. i think they deserve that.

someone's up awfully late this evening.

Ii's my business to catch the undertones of the soul.

if there are any ghosts round here, they're the tame ghosts of a salt marsh and a shallow cove.

i feel like you're disappearing from me.

the darkness has a way of catching me.

it must be shocking to see the state of things here.

do you feel it, [name]? the fear.

what you make--it crawls behind the eyes, it makes you crazy.

i know where fear lives.

DREAMS IN THE WITCH HOUSE.

don't you worry. i'll help you figure it out.

i promised you I'd protect you. you remember that, don't you?

who has the power to break it down?

i know the other side is real. i've seen it.

maybe it's time that we consider what else we can do with our lives.

the house has undeniable powers.

you care more about your dead sister than the living.

i've seen a forest. a forest that takes the dead inside.

wait, wait. you're telling me that you put an unknown chemical from an unknown gentleman into your body?

what we need to do is knock some sense into you.

i think you're desperate, [name].

i think you'd do anything, anything, to prove that what you've been fighting for is real.

i'm sorry. i'm sorry i couldn't save you when i had the chance.

if i hadn't been so afraid, i wouldn't have ended up here.

i couldn't think of anything else but seeing you again.

i have to investigate that house.

something stalked you here. it followed you through the door.

there's something in there trying to hurt us.

i feel the energy her anger left behind.

they stuck pins in her to see if she would bleed.

what demons have you been conjuring?

the dead want you now.

i hope you understand what you brought to this world.

what i've done cannot be undone!

i told you, you couldn't escape me.

i'll ride this body as long as it will last.

THE VIEWING.

you're like a legend.

hey, buddy, got a smoke?

i was intrigued for sure.

what kind of flowers are these?

well, it looks amazing and sounds amazing.

i am not gonna let temptation get the better of me.

it made its way across all that chaos, all of that potential destruction, longer than many human lives, to us here tonight.

i want to know what your stunning mind makes of it.

now i'm even more curious than ever before.

dead worlds seed new, living ones, time and time again.

she's proven what others refuse to admit about the nature of the universe and humanity.

it's hard to talk about it in words, you know?

your presence here has made this night so much brighter to me.

science tells us you can never truly know the future state of a particle.

perhaps control of the machinery is your real ambition.

i want something that doesn't exist.

there's a void inside of me, you, everyone. an endless abyss.

everyone has a black hole inside of 'em. what i want is for mine to stop eating everything up all the time.

you are really harshing my mellow, man.

yhe truth is much more complicated.

i can't tell you about an image you already have in your mind.

i saw his blood, i saw his tears.

oh, a test where i have to do cocaine? finally, a test i can pass.

it's not as if you've never done this before.

it made me nostalgic for things that never happened.

you brought me all the way out here to show me a fucking rock?

did you not hear anything we just said right now?

THE MURMURING.

birds carry our souls, our beliefs, our hopes.

but that word...that word also suggests a voice, a whisper, a prayer uttered in the dark when we think we have lost it all.

pop me in a room with a stack of books, and I'm happy.

who wouldn't want to lift off and fly away from the world like that sometimes?

if there is a god, he certainly is a very cruel one.

i'll check, you go back to bed.

what are you doing here in the gloom?

what are you reading?

they sound different. more melancholy.

you haven't had any sleep. you're very tired.

it might help if you tell me what i'm meant to be listening for.

you get that crease, just there, when you're trying to solve a mystery.

this is beautiful. but when i look at it, all i feel is sad.

she must have felt very trapped here.

is it so wrong to read a dead person's letters?

and how do you know they're dead?

god forbid i should feel something.

the minute some people step into a falling-down old house, they start seeing ghosts.

you haven't cried at all. not since...everything happened.

people say they see things here, but it's just a morbid fascination with other people's misery.

how am i ever supposed to help you if you never tell me anything?

why is it always about me? you went through this too, [name].

i feel lost. i feel...angry. i feel completely heartbroken.

i try and i try, and i just feel you slipping away.

take my hand. you won't be alone or cold anymore.

i've been so lost.

[loeyonline]

I crash U crash

this is part 2 of "be quiet and drive" it's not another new hendery fic sorry. But I didn't want to leave the other one with that wtf ending, so here you go, I hope you enjoy

Contains: drama, drugs, sex (and hoes), nu metal references, toxicity

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

Their friendship went to hell, all those years together went to the trash.

That night Hendery took his usual drug, lying in his chair while watching TV, watching those sexual humor cartoons that were showing on MTV.

Thinking about whether to call you and tell you it was a joke, that he wasn't in love with you and that he wanted to keep fucking you hard against the wall but he knew it was too late.

But he also felt angry with you, because he always tried to show you that he loved you a lot and it bothers him to know that he is not interested in you at all, that you prefer those stupid boys who only think about sex and cocaine, that ok maybe he wasn't the one. healthiest man of all but I wanted to change for you

He really wanted to quit the stupidity of being a skater and play in the rock band.

He felt useless, because he saw that you were going to university and planning your life, while he was playing on his Play 2 and taking drugs all day.

He hadn't considered his life until he started fucking you, being inside you made him want to be someone.

I knew that you were worth it and that a person like him.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

On the way back to your house, you were driving the car while crying.

Listening to your favorite sad music, trying not to crash.

The situation was screwed up for you, and thinking a little you said things you didn't mean, you really love Hendery.

Why the hell did you tell him you just wanted to fuck him?

You knew you had done shit to the boy, and you wanted to fix everything, but your pride wouldn't let you.

You lied to yourself saying that it was best not to speak again and forget everything.

"How are you going to forget the boy of your entire life?"

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

The following months were even worse, because they ran into each other from time to time in the city and it was uncomfortable, but mostly sad.

He didn't even look at you, he pretended you didn't exist, but I think the worst thing was discovering that he went out with other girls and fucked with them.

He did it to forget you but he knew it wasn't the solution.

Knowing that, you felt less eager to engage in a conversation with him again, much less a friendship.

He on the other hand discovered that you were meeting someone, that made him vomit.

At this point the two wanted to forget about each other and move on but it was impossible, especially knowing that they didn't completely hate each other.

But the silence ended when Hendery discovered that your boyfriend was being unfaithful to you. He could have taken the role of the bad boy who was going to find the man who hurt you and beat him almost to death but he wasn't stupid.

He just sent you a message asking if you were okay.

You lost all pride and called him out.

"Hey, is something wrong? Are you okay?"

"Nothing is okay, I need you"

"I'm going to your house" and hung up.

You got ready a little and mentally prepared yourself because you knew that seeing him after a long time was going to be hard.

Seeing him after having fought, after having told him that he was just a sex toy.

You felt guilty for all the things you said to him and you started to cry.

You tried to hide your swollen eyes but it was too late, He was already here.

You left the house and saw how he was waiting for you outside the car, normally he always waited for you inside but today he wanted to be gentlemanly and open the car door for you.

But as soon as you saw him you started crying more and you threw yourself on him to hug him, you really missed him.

He was surprised by your reaction, he had seen you disheveled, drugged, fighting with a homeless man, drunk, masturbating him with your tits, but he could swear he had never seen you crying.

It was strange but tender at the same time, because I knew I was seeing your most fragile side, making you fall in love even more.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

He took you to eat hamburgers at one of those 80's style restaurants, in the place they talked about what they had done in the time they didn't talk, you were surprised to know that he was studying to enter university, he said that studies were not served and that I wanted to have a nu metal band and die at 27 but now, He is planning a life.

You, on the other hand, wanted to avoid talking about your relationship because it was what Hendery expected, a drug addict with parental absence.

But unlike Hendery a few months ago, he wasn't going to judge you, he actually wanted to take you for a walk for a while so you could forget your hell for a while and maybe be close to you again.

Finishing eating, they returned to the car, but before he started and went to drop you off at your house, you begged him to spend more time outside.

"It's very bold of me, but I don't want to go home yet, I mean, I want to spend more time with you."

"No problem baby"

And that's what he did, spending more time with you, driving around the city, laughing at everything, with good music, you dancing in your seat and him looking at you while he smokes a cigarette, completely crazy about you.

He looked so hot while driving and smoking.

The tranquility did not last long since neither of them could hold back their desire and they took off to a lonely street so they could fuck.

Going to the back seats to have better space, you on top of him, moving on his cock while he touches your entire body.

Kissing as if it were the last day on earth, taking off their clothes as fast as if they were paying for it.

"You know, I missed seeing your tits bounce while you bounce on my cock."

His dirty words made you very stupid, you became weaker as the seconds passed and all you could think about was how fucking hot Hendery is.

"And you know that I missed you pulling my hair, sinking your cock to the bottom and saying that I am only yours."

"It's a good night to relive old times" he says while slapping your ass. And that happened, they fucked, like in the old days, until they ran out of breath.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

It was 7 in the morning, they slept in the car and instead of going home, Hendery preferred to take you to the beach that was a few kilometers from the city, it doesn't matter, they wanted to get away from society for a while.

When they got out of the car they went to sit on the sand, to watch the waves reach the shore. There was a quiet silence until Hendery confessed "I know we kissed at the Slipknot concert."

You weren't that surprised since you had thought about it after you had grown apart.

"I know, you're bad at pretending."

"Do you also know that I still love you?"

"Maybe"

"Fine"

"Hendery… I love you too"

N/A: Unlike be quiet an drive, it is not based on my experience with my ex, but on how I would have liked it to have ended.