#making my sexist grandma sad oh well

[fixingmysociallife]

Nuking Family Christmas by growing a backbone

G'Day Depressos,

my holiday break is now officially over and I can say: Shit hit. the. fan. this year. Me, my sister and two of my cousins united to finally speak up about a topic that has made us uncomfortable for years: My uncle. My uncle by marriage. My uncle by marriage who got broken up with by my aunt two years ago but still shows up to all family functions. My uncle by marriage who got broken up with by my aunt two years ago but still shows up to all family functions and who got a criminal record for scamming family friends for a lot of money and tax evasion.

Deeeep inhale. My uncle by marriage who got broken up with by my aunt two years ago but still shows up to all family functions and who got a criminal record for scamming family friends for a lot of money and tax evasion and who inappropriatly touched my sister when she was 15 like a fucking disgusting child-molesting creep-douchebag (she refuses to tell anyone but me and mom tho).

And everyone is apparently okay with that. Well, this christmas my aunt had planned to come alone, without her ex (who she still spends one dinner a week and every family vacation with), their two demonic children and equally horribly-behaved dog, but last minute, my grandparents asked her to bring them. And then, we decided that we wouldn't attend and informed my grandma. Hell broke loose. Christmas was completely cancelled, then reinstalled, then canacelled again. We got so many angry calls from people threatening and gaslighting us into backing down, accepting our place, pulling through for da fääämily. That we should think about their children (who's lack of education and untreated mental health problems are primarily their father's fault imo) My sister was constantly on the verge of giving in, but I'm proud to say that I supported her in standing her ground. In the end, grabby uncle and his clan decided not to come and it was the best family christmas celebration ever. My grandma was super frosty towards us, but that was nothing new for us since we're the girls, my cousins were a litte heartbroken though (sexist family dynamics and stuff). It was also relaxed for once bc a huge part of the family was vacation anyway, our very own ati-vaxxers for example.My family is so conflict-avoidant that nothing ever gets communicated, spoken through and decided. I'm glad that we could use the swing of the most important holiday to actually move some things. What I want to say: If you have problems in your social sphere that people refuse to address, don't be scared to go all out and risk huge fights. Encanto should have taught all of us that sometimes things need to be broken down before being build up more healthily again. You don't need to "just push through" for family, friends, coworker or anyone. Fuck all of them, who put peace and quiet above your feelings. I feel this Christmas was a huge step in the project this blog is dedicated to, because all my life I have hated my families guts. Allowing myself to inspire change for my own sake felt very empowering. I also have another, more positive Christmas story to tell, but that will get its own post. See you there, byee!

[esepoimipullula]

For the ship bingo, may I get uhhh... pete/trudy (because I lov them), italian!grandpa beagle/grandma duck (op your mind 😩👌🏻) and scrooge/brigitta (out of curiosity) pwease?

Oooh, thank you!! Those are some very good choices because I actually do have quite a few things to say about them. XD

Pete/Trudy:

It’s not quite an OTP, not in the sense that I crave more of it and I’m always ready to talk about it, but I love it and think it’s a very good ship. I know it sounds silly because she was literally made for him... but they’re really made for each other. They’re literal partner in crimes, a well-oiled team and even a battle couple where one’s strengths and peculiarities complement the other’s, and at the same time, they’re just two cute, silly romantics who give each other lovey-dovey nicknames. It might just be my love for villainous couples who genuinely love and care for each other talking here, but I think that’s an adorable dynamic. 

However, I am kind of picky about it. I remember reading some stories, years ago, where their domesticity was emphasized (which I did like) but the rest of their dynamic was... not that great. He thought she was a nag and she thought he was a boor, he didn’t care enough to remember dates and anniversaries and she was too demanding and uppity and had unreasonable expectations, he hated her cooking but couldn’t tell her that because she’d get angry and yell at him, there were jokes about her being fat or unladylike or both... sitcom married life, basically. I didn’t like that. I much prefer an expert thief Trudy who offers Pete some clever advice because they’re partners in work and in life and succeed or go down together, and a Pete who clearly loves her and likes being around her and cares about her opinions. Bonus points if they snark a bit at each other but like, mildly - not because they actually want to offend the other but because they’re generally snarky people. EXTRA bonus points if they use crime as a way to flirt or plot and execute crimes together like other people go on dates. I want them to have fun and make heart eyes at each other while robbing banks and whatnot. <3

My only exceptions are the Pete and Trudy in Wizards of Mickey and the ones in Cronache della Frontiera. Those are SO GOOD but it’s because of how lowkey or highkey fucked-up they are. And also because the Trudys in those universes are HOT. There, I said it. u.u 

I’m not the biggest WoM fan (the first seasons were pretty cool and had some really interesting concepts, but the ones that followed... eh) but seeing Trudy as a rugged, fabulous evil witch pirate, so sure of herself and competent, was super fun... just like her bickering and flirting with arrogant dark wizard Pete! 

When it comes to Cronache della Frontiera, where their relationship is Unhealthiness Central... oh, the shifting power dynamics! Badass established crime boss Trudy taking the inexpert, somewhat uncertain (and possibly younger?) newbie Pete in and being charmed by his cocky and determined attitude despite everything, finding out she does have a heart in the process, only for him to gradually become even darker than her and the driving force in their group! And the jealousy! The possessiveness! The love triangle that actually WORKS (at least for me, lol) because it’s not really a love triangle at all! The literal attempted murder! THAT is the problematic stuff I like to see, not some sexist trope about the old, fat (*eyeroll*) ball and chain!

Incidentally, WoM!Pete/Trudy and Cronache!Pete/Trudy are the reason I circled the “sexual” option. Thinking about Disney characters having sex might be weird, but those two couples? I’m 100% sure they FUCKED.

-

Italian!Grandpa Beagle/Grandma Duck:

AAAAAAAAAAAAH, I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!!! ;_______;

It all started with this story where the Beagle Boys and their Grandpa were arrested after a botched attempted at robbing the Quacktown post office and Grandma Duck took pity on them and offered to let them work off their sentence on her farm in hopes that they’d learn to be good citizens, and the boys slowly started to like honest work and having a kindly old lady around but old Grazia stubbornly clung to their traditional thieving ways despite his life having improved, too, so there was always this simmering tension between them. Or maybe it was the story where Grandma Duck got it in her head that there was actually some good in Grandpa Beagle and he liked her company so he tried not to steal around her, and the Beagles were like “wtf is happening” and Scrooge was outraged and kept trying to warn Elvira off that risky “””friendship””” (seh), and in the end he did steal something and she caught him except maybe it wasn’t really him and maybe she was unsure about their relationship and self-sabotaging by looking for any excuse to call it off and he didn’t like being with someone who didn’t trust him and/or couldn’t accept him as he was so they basically had a messy break up. Or maybe the one where everyone in Duckburg was literally brainwashed by their new phones except for them and Scrooge because ahahah old people hate technology, and they joined up in this badass old people heroic team to save the city, and Grandma and Grandpa had this nice little “oh, you’re pretty good at this!” “well, you’re not bad yourself!” moment while they took down the villains.

... okay, so I don’t really remember which one of these came first, but still, thanks to all of them I am DELIGHTED at the idea of this romance. I mean, they’re both smart, headstrong, driven, generally sensible, sometimes petty, pretty damn badass old people who believe very strongly in their own values? Except those values are pretty much opposite because she’s all about honesty and hard work and doing the right thing even when it’s difficult, but he takes pride in being a thief and wants to get rich by stealing? But then, they both care a lot about family and tradition? Except her family is fundamentally good if quirky and he literally encourages his to be ruthless criminals, and the traditions they care about reflect that? They’re basically foils, and the contrast and the similarities between them are both so strong... and so entertaining! 

And the soft old people romance! The possibilities for old-fashioned courting and quiet moments together just talking about their youth and the old days or about their families, the subtle but genuine compliments and expressions of affection, the rare but easy handholding and the heartfelt “I care about you”s...

I would DEFINITELY read fanfictions about them. But I think they would need to be either AUs (someone let them play a bickering couple in a parody or period story, PLEASE!) or, if set in regular Duckburg, either pre-relationship or mutual pining stuff. I’ve already seen them in a (sort of) romantic relationship in canon and it didn’t end well... and I honestly can’t see things ever ending any different. His nephews might come around and support them, especially if they liked her as a person and kind of came to see her as their grandma, too, like in that one story mentioned above, but I don’t think her family would. At least, not all of them, and especially NOT Scrooge, who’d do anything to keep them apart. Plus, unless he suddenly decided not to be a thief anymore or she decided to become a thief, too, - I can’t even tell WHICH option sounds more unlikely! - their differences would eventually drive them apart anyway. 

And that’s... kind of another thing I like about this ship, weirdly enough? The “it’s not unrequieted but it still can’t happen, and not because of any external pressure but because of who they are as people” angst. And the “I can’t be be with you because of who you are but I wouldn’t love you if you were anyone else” bittersweet angst/fluff combo. As the bingo square says, “it’s complicated.”

-

Scrooge/Brigitta:

No offense to anyone who does like it... but I just don’t. I usually appreciate unrequieted ships for the angst, but here the obsessive aspect is a major turn-off for me. Especially in those stories where it’s portrayed as a positive thing, like an expression of True Love or a sign that Brigitta is a strong-willed person who just has to hold out a little longer or push a little harder before she finally gets the happy ending she deserves. Or in those stories where other characters suggest Scrooge is just playing hard to get. Or where he’s forced to endure a date with her as punishment for something. Or where he gets scolded for not agreeing to go out with her, rather than for treating her too rudely or taking advantage of her feelings to reach his goals. Just... let people not date people they don’t like that way, maybe?!

That’s not to say I don’t like Brigitta as a character. I do, I think she has potential, and I don’t like it when she gets the short end of the stick, either. Like when Scrooge uses her to get what he wants, or he treats her badly even if for once she’s not being the clingy, smothering person she usually is around him. 

I do like those rare moments where they get along and he’s nice to her because he wants to and not because he’s prompted by either guilt or pressure. But that’s not really enough to make me ship them. Like, I could see them as friends? Or as mentor and pupil or equal business partners, since she’s a businesswoman in her own right? Bur never as romantic partners.

I’d say I wouldn’t read fic about them, but I actually did, once. It was a sad story about Scrooge dying and Brigitta trying to rebuild her life without him when he had been her goal and purpose for so long, and it had hints of Scrooge/Goldie, but technically, it still counts. And I actually wouldn’t mind reading more stuff like that... with Brigitta learning to let go and live her own life for herself.

[ry-ra]

Re-Watch: Episode 1 Doctors (2016)

I love Park Shin Hye and I wanted to re-watch Doctors. Kim Rae Won and Park Shin Hye made such an odd couple, but they made sparks fly <3

So let’s see if my memory serves me correct and this drama is still good 4 years later. I know they don’t really meet up in the present in this episode, but Yoo Hye Jung tells her story about the person she wants to meet up with and she shares her past and how they meet. Let’s Go~

Right off the bat some gangsters show up demanding treatment for their injured boss and he refuses to let Yoo Hye assist. He wants a male Doctor... sexist pig. She kicks some ass and this leads to a flashback of her High School life. She’s a problematic teen, but you can say misunderstood. She doesn’t have the best relationship with her dad and she lost her mother when she was little. She lives with her grandma, since the new stepmom is afraid of Yoo Hye. I love this role for Park Shin Hye. She got the roles of the sweet innocent girl next door and in this one she’s kicking ass, saving lives and smooching a suave sexy man. Good for her.

We meet Teacher Hong, Hong Ji Hong and he’s the biology teacher. Yoo Hye gets transferred to his school, but they first meet when she steals a CD at a record store he’s at. I find it funny she mentions that he’s got a lolita complex... lol!

He helps her at the record store, but outside he tells her that he only helped her since she was a student and demands her to give the CD back. They tussle with the bag and she kicks him! LOL! I forgot this part.

She fights a lot in this episode. 

Ji Hong is a Doctor, but for some reason can’t go into a hospital. I forgot he had a Doctor friend and I believe she also liked him. This man had 3 woman after him... he doesn’t have a Flynn Ryder face, but he’s handsome, so yeah, I can kinda see him having a flock of girls.

Yoo Hye goes to a night club and gets “assaulted” (can’t find the right word) by Kim Soo Chul, a sexy motorcycle oppa and then she fights some more! Damn, girl. They made her look like a bitch, good job! 

Plot twist, Teacher Hong is the new tenant at Yoo Hye’s grandma. She’s not happy, she kicks things, he’s scaredof her, so funny. The grandma tries to convice her to go to school, she refuses, so she makes her work. She quickly changes her tune and enrolls, but her teacher is Hong Ji Hong and he refuses to be her teacher, well, she can kick his ass, so his decision is a wise one.

He punishes the students that were caught fighting in the club, but they quickly point fingers to Yoo Hye as she’s the one that started the fight. They all get detention, but her stinking attitude rubs him the wrong way and he dismisses the other girls... I am shocked and not sure if he does it or not, I can’t recall!!! He picks up a stick and prepares to strike her ass! Oh My.

That concludes episode 1. I do recall most of the plot and can’t wait to finish re-watching this drama. I know it’s going to get sad, but I know there are going to be some great scenes between Kim Rae Won and Park Shin Hye.

[tumblunni]

What do you guys think about the names Dustin and Darcy for my protagonists in Let's Go?

Cos i really wanted to play the co op mode thing by myself, just so i can pretend this role in the plot is filled by two siblings and have a bit of fun roleplaying that. But i dunno yet how the co-op works and whether you'd be able to customize the avatar of the second player or if its just the default trainer? Or can you only play co-op if you have two separate games? Im planning to buy the other version anyway once i get more money, so it could be fun to play my first version with sibling one and then the second playthru is sibling two's turn to shine!

Oh and the whole reason i wanted to do this is cos i wanna try out the customization features to make some ocs now that there's no competitive online stuff unless you pay a subscription fee (LOL NO THANKS). Like..i always felt like i HAD to make my character me in xy/sumo/usum, otherwise its like lying online? But of course i cant actually make me because theres no nonbinary option or even remotely ambiguous outfits for either gender. And you cant have wild hair colours while i dye my hair 24/7 irl lol. Its silly cos like 95% of the gym leaders and other characters ingame have anime hair colours yet the player has to be normal? So yeah i cpuldnt really enjoy making this innacurate defanged version of myself yet i didnt feel like i was allowed to just make up a new character either. Closest i could do was give myself white hair like my old trainersona when i was 12, lol. I mean i guess thats my 'real hair colour' underneath the dye right now, if you think about it that way?

OH GOD PIKACHU CAN HAVE A LITTLE TUXEDO AND BOWLER HAT HOLY FUCK IM SORRY TO INTERRUPT THIS BUT I WAS WATCHING THE IGN REVIEW AND THEY SHOWED PIKA BOWLER HAT PLEASE GO GOOGLE THAT VIDEO JUST FOR THAT 1 SECOND OF NEW FOOTAGE OF MY BEAUTIFUL CLASSY BOYE

okay where was i

Yeah! I think sibling trainers could be a good and unique way to handle a rival! Like having them be your sibling already establishes that rivalry. But it can be a soft and nice rivalry! I wanna go with that fun version rather than the full on angry exaggerated sibling rivalries you often see in kids media. Like i know that some people legit dont get on with their siblings and some people can even have a very gary esque full on rivalry thats sorta 'love to hate' or like..tsundere pretending you hate them. But personally i never had experience with that, i can never relate to those 'tfw u hate ur sibling and theyre always an asshole but lolll u love them anyway' posts. I only got to live with my little sister for a little while due to the catastrophe of abusive parenthood that was my childhood, and i lost contact with her forever when she was very young so i doubt she'd even remember me. *sigh* But like i don't think i only love her so much because i miss her! People say newborns and toddlers are the most bratty so like you'd think if i was gonna ever find her 'annoying' i would have done it back then. I was always just mega proud of her and whenever she'd be 'bratty' i'd be cheering her on and trying to protect her from mom. And when she'd try and pull pranks on me or practise play-fighting or whatever i was just like 'lol thats legit funny' and taking play-falls so she felt better about herself. Like we didnt have much power in that household so i felt like encouraging her pretending to be a wrestler would help her feel like she had some sort of control in some part of her life i guess? And just i wished i was allowed to roughhouse and run around and be all 'unladylike' and just enjoy BEING A KID when i was a kid, yknow? I always had legit fun being with her and legit enjoyed it and was legit proud and legit never annoyed. I just dont understand 'yeah she's annoying but i love her anyway'. I was only ever her rival as a play-rival to help encourage her to like.. Enjoy the things she enjoyed. Feel like someone else cared. I only ever acted like 'ha ha baby stuff yeah sure i hate hanging out with my sister" cos i thought i was SUPPOSED TO. I always felt so guilty doing it and so dissappointed cos id rather hang out with her than be a boring stereotypical teen tbh. I dunno, maybe this isnt typical for siblings and its just a sign of how badly we were raised? I was just real fuckin lonely and absolutely loved having a family member who loved me for the first time since my grandma died. Same reason i always used to act all 'i am too cool i totally am not soft for my lil sister' around my lil sister's dad. I really wanted him to love me too! I used to say swear words at him cos i thougjt he would thibk i was Cool And Adult?? I have soooo many cringe moments from that phase of my childhood. Man it hurts to think that i never actually did get to become that positive influence that protected my sister from my mum and let her know she was loved. Cos i was sent to live with my dad when she was like 5ish? And never saw her again and now im too scared to try and reach out to her again because 1: she probably doesnt even remember me, 2: theres a chance she believes my mum saying i was some horrible asshole who abandoned the family, 3: even bigger chance that contacting her could mean my mum finding me again and big fuckin risk of further abuse. Plus the awkwardness of introducing my trans self when she'd remember me as her sister and all. Sigh! All i can do is hope that her cool dad eventually got custody of her, and that he didnt turn out to be a secret bastard like when i met my own dad. He seemed good, but then again i was just a lil kid and my dad seemed good at first. Sighhhhhh...

SO UMM YEAH WOW I MADE MYSELF SAD

Anyway the point is that whenever i write siblings i'd rather write 100% unapologetic super loving love cos its wish fullfillment for me. This is also why in/cest shipping is a massive beserk button for me, good wholesome family relationships are REAL FUCKIN IMPORTANT and how DARE you corrupt that shit! Some people would fuckin KILL to have that wholesome family!!

Anyway lol thats why i'd like a Wholesome Rivalry for these sibling ocs! Like they challenge each other to contests along the way just for fun, and they react all 'wow my sis is the BEST' when you beat them, so hard feelings at all. And you dont JUST do rival stuff but also sometimes just hang out and have fun cos you missed each other. And if anyone threatens your sibling then THAT is the only time you see the Serious Sibling Power! Rival moments: ha ha lol bet ya cant beat me ooo im a scary villain LOL I CANT KEEP A STRAIGHT FACE HAHA! Giovanni punches your brother: *stony cold death glare from hell as tricksy prank sis turns into an unstoppable vengeance engine* Oh, but also the only other time they'd be serious is in their final battle together! Like most of the 'rivalry' is just competing to make the adventure fun and to help each other get stronger. But if sis/bro ever actually legit said they really want to fight to find out who's the best, and its like..important to help their self confidence, then i think bro/sis would respect that and go all out. Taking a fall and letting them win would be the most disrespectful thing of all! Oh, but i do think there would be one kind of battle like that during the story? Like in one of the more low stakes faux-rival fights the sibling actually does try and let you win, and the challenge is to try and lose against all odds. High stakes super failure battle!!! Imagine the evil team in the background like 'wtf' as these two run the most aggressively slow race of all time! XD

Oh and i kinda thought about different personalities for the two of them based on who you pick? Like i did like that aspect about brendan/may in RSE compared to other 'unpicked option becomes rival' characters in later games that didnt even have one personality let alone two. It just sucks that the personalities they decided to give them were 'female rival is super self concious and thinks youre better than her because youre a boy' and 'male rival is super ego and thinks he's better than you because he's a boy'. Boooo!

So instead of that the personalities i was thinking for these two would be less sexist lol. Male sibling Dustin is basically Wally so far? I need to develop him a bit more to make him a bit distinct, i mean its not like every single shy dude is identical. I'm thinking maybe mix him with all the wasted potential in Brendan? Like in the game they slightly hint at him having the ONE non stereotypical trait of liking cute teddy bears, and that made me think about how much better his whole plot would have been if it actually criticized his sexism and said that he only behaves that way cos he's overcompensating for being bullied for being 'feminine', yknow? And then in the manga they actually DO write him as super feminine, and even as a contest star who loves fashion and dressing up his pokemon! But then GAHHH they present it as some sort of fuckin 'character flaw', like he's shown to be selfish and superficial because of it. And the backstory is that him and the female protagonist used to be 'normal' until a traumatic event. Brendan was a Natural Fighting Prodigy until he saved his female friend from a wild pokemon and was so traumatized that he never wanted to fight again, while she wanted to learn to fight so she'd never need to be protected again. But this is not only presented as Wrong Ways To Be Gender but also like.. Fighting their natural instinct which still comes through?? Like male protag hasnt fought in YEARS yet whenever he's forced to fight he's just magically better at it than female protag who's been practising all these years to become his equal. Ha ha silly girl you can never achieve that! All you get is this patronizing 'well if you just tryyyyy girly things im sure you'll like it' plot and then you get rescued by him in the end because OF COURSE you do. Sigh! I cant believe they made me hate that pairing even more than the games did! So yeah i dont really wanna write Dustin as a jerkass who's secretly got synpathetic motives of internalized homophobia/sexism, cos i feel thats a plot very specific to my perceptuons of Brendan and id basically just have to make Dustin a clone of him and he wouldnt be able to shine on his own merits. Instead i'm just thinking of writing him as a 100% sensitive soul, and he still faces predjudice for not being that bigoted idea of an 'ideal man' but really the fact he doesnt bow down to their demands proves that he's the bravest person here.

And then I'm thinking maybe the female sibling Darcy is the older one and is a bit "gary ish"? Like eitjer way you still have a friendly and loving siblingness, but she's a bit more of a sass who is tsundere about admitting she loves her bro. But i dont think she's the cold or grumpy sort of tsundere, more like a trickstery tomboy? Bombastic loki jock sis! She can only be a bit abrasive with her bro cos she wants to teach him to be tough even when she's not there to protect him. But sometimes she can mess it up and make him feel like he has to change his personality in order to be tough, rather than letting him know she supports him in being "unmasculine" and just wants to help him find the confidence to stand up to people who bully him for it. Like she feels like she is 'weaker' than him in the sense that she worries too much about what people will think if she expresses her real emotions, yknow? Like theyre both suffering from toxic masculinity! He's suffering from the standard form where men who are too 'soft' are beaten down into that mould. Ans she's suffering from the problem where 'masculine' girls feel like they have to be '100% masculine' in order to be allowed to be themselves at all. Like back when i was a kid and before i came out as trans i always used to try and pretend to like sports ans like..cliche macho shit where you Cant Admit You Care About Your Friends and also i wasnt allowed to like ANY feminine things at all. I had to either follow the stereotype of femininity entirely or follow the opposite stereotype, i wasnt allowed to just reject stereotypes and like what i actually like. So yeah me realizing i wasnt really a girl has led to me embracing more 'girly' things than back when i thought i was one! So i think Darcy would have a similar arc but like..the cis equivelant? Just finds people who arent such judgmental pricks and stops having to conform to either of those stereotypes in order to keep fake friends who dont really give a shit about her. She can have a plot about both forced feminine and masculine stereotypes being equally limiting, rather than that shitty 'being masculine is a prison uwu every woman will be happier embracing her love of makeup' shit. That dominant narrative just made me feel like i was somehow wrong about myself whenever i didnt like 100% Of Sports All The Time, i must be somehow girly if i liked even ONE girly thing yet i needed hundreds of proofs if i wanted to be masculine. And like i wasnt just allowed to be neither! I wasnt allowed to like parts of both! I wasnt allowed to BE GODDAMN TRANS!!! So yeah i dunno if i'd go whole hog and make this character a trans man or a nonbinary person tho? I think she's just actually a cis girl who happens to be sporty and brash and likes a lot of 'masculine' fashion and hobbies. And she's just been made to feel self concious about it, as if she cant possibly REALLY be that unless she likes Every Single Boy Thing and wins at Every Single Challenge. Does anyone else remember that shit too? The girls have to win Every sports game against the boys in order to be 'one of the boys' but if you lose even one of them it somehow proves that you're inferior. Even though the boys lost 50 billion games to you and that doesnt prove theyre inferior! Like man she has sooooo many 'gary rivals' in her school life, thats why she loves going on this adventure with a kind brother rival who actually respects her! So her resolution would just be her staying the same but being more confident about it and saying fuk u to those fake friends. Same as her brother's plot, just they both face different specifics to the way this sexism affects them, yknow?

Oh but yeah when i did finally learn about LGBT stuff and realize i was trans it was Big Amazing cos even in the rare stories about Its Okay To Be Yourself it still left me feeling weirdly empty when the girl decides that yes she does wanna be a girl in the end. So i get that these plots might come off as queerbaiting if i write them badly? I need to make sure to make it clear that these characters 100% want to be seen as this gender and its just other people being fuckfaces and trying to define what their gender has to mean. I think maybe i'll try and mitigate this potential misunderstanding by adding different sorts of lgbt content. And, well, also cos i just want lgbt content in all of my stories because i am lgbt, of course! I'm 100% sure that Darcy is gay, and i think also maybe possibly Dustin is trans? Like, his plot is about being mocked for being a 'feminine' boy, but its also even more personal for him because he's a trans boy and he feels like he needs to change his personality in order to pass/he isnt really real because his personality doesnt fit the stereotypical image of a man. Like if you'd looked at the two of them back when they were identical twins, you probably would have expected Darcy to end up being trans if you were the sort of person who believes those basic ass stereotypes about 'boys who play with barbies and girls who play with trucks'. Or i mean maybe its the other way around and Darcy is a trans girl who still has a 'masculine' personality according to stereotypes? Or even both of them are trans and both face being told that they arent real because they dont fit the perfect stereotype of a trans person according to cis perceptions? Or maybe i'm overcomplicating things with all of this and it'd just muddy the message i guess. I might just keep it to them both being cis but also both of them like girls. And i can always apply my trans and other LGBT headcanons to other characters along their adventure.

Anyway LOL im rambling too much!