#made sure i didnt use any of the same posts as the other one i reblogged earlier 🫡 i had a lot of them saved to my illario board

[lelianaslefthand]

illario text post/tweet compilation pt 1

[arolesbianism]

Thinking abt Sif Odile duo looping au again and I wanna be able to plot everything out more coherently but act 5 eternally looms overhead and boy I do not wanna look up

[norrisainz33]

celebrity crush || eo31

☆ summary: esteban gets the chance to meet his celeb crush at f175

☆ pairing: esteban ocon x famous!reader

☆ fc & warnings: bella hadid x none

☆ a/n: first esteban fic!!! if u saw me post this by accident before... no you didnt

masterlist

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ��

new interview with esteban ocon has been posted

view transcript

[interviewer 1] so esteban -- its no secret that you are a very big fan of marvel and super heroes! can we expect to see more special super hero helmets this season?

[esteban] yes!! i have some exciting special helmets!! tho i dont want to give too much away but there will be one featured this season for sure

[interviewer 2] amazing, well we can't wait to see what you're cooking up!!

[interviewer 1] while we’re on the topic... a little birdy told us that a particular hero and actress were your favorite - y/n y/l/n?

[esteban] *laughs* oui y/n may or may not be my celebrity crush. i just think she is a fantastic actress and she plays one of my favorite characters in the marvel universe

[interviewer 1] well you're in luck esteban! the same little birdy told me that she's going to be in attendance at the f175 event tonight!

[esteban] no way! well i'm really going to have to get dressed up now eh?

estebanocon has posted to his private story

view all story replies

lando: WHAT

estebanocon: mate i know

lando: you better shoot your shot

estebanocon: that’s the plan!

lando: i’m fairly certain lewis knows her…. let me see what i can do 😉

estebanocon: 😮

lance_stroll: now is your time to shine

estebanocon: wish me luck mon ami

olliebearman: **and for our livery reveal

estebanocon: well of course

haasf1team: our intel says she was invited by alpine (🤢) because of their owners. she'll be sat 2 tables away from us if my seating chart is accurate

estebanocon: admin you are my HERO

haasf1team: you’re our hero estie

abbipulling: if you don't catch her im going to be disappointed

estebanocon: going to try my hardest!

teamestebanocon: good luck boss man

estebanocon: ❤️

ynuser has posted to their story

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user1: LONDON?!

user2: are you in london bc they’re making you the new queen? or…..

lando: my friend esteban ocon would give you a car if they don’t let you keep that one

teamestebanocon: my friend esteban ocon saved some cats from a burning building today and let me borrow his ferrari. i’m sure you could borrow his car too

user3: mother mother mother

estebanocon: 😍 looking forward to seeing you at the o2 later!

haasf1team: we can’t get you an alpine but we can get you some paddock passes to attend a race with a superior team 🫣

ynuser: hmmm is the monaco gp on the table?

haasf1team: OMG

haasf1team: sorry… i mean yes! any gp is on the table!

lewishamilton: and this is how i find out you're coming tonight?

ynuser: surpriseeee!!!! hehe sorry lewy. ive been so busy i forgot to reach out

lewishamilton: all good y/n! i'm looking forward to seeing you. p.s. i promised one of my fellow drivers that i'd introduce you to someone so be ready

ynuser: cryptic but fair. are they cute at least 👀

lewishamilton: i'll let you decide that one for yourself

user4: ok she’s a car girl now?

yourbff: no no get a pink lambo baby not this white alpine nonsense

ynuser: you're so right

zendaya: pleaseeeee come visit tom and i tomorrow

ynuser: done and done. i miss you both more than anything in the whole world

user5: i’ll buy whatever it is you’re selling

f1gossip has made a post

liked by user1, user2, user3, user4, user5, user6, user7, user8, user9, and 14,320 others

f1gossip: marvel superstar and fashion icon, y/n y/l/n, has graced the f175 red carpet! its said that she's here at the request of her costar/alpine investor. we wouldn't be properly reporting if we didn't also tell you that she was spotted talking with lando norris and esteban ocon after lewis hamilton appeared to introduce his fellow drivers to his superstar friend. esteban has publicly said on multiple occasions that y/n is his celebrity crush - could our very own esteban have shot his shot? we'll keep you updated if we hear anymore.

view all comments

ynfan1: WHO THAT IN THE MIDDLE SLIDE

ynfan2: no fr.... im looking.....respectfully....... should i get into f1?

user31: pls look away this is a family affair

user1: my two worlds colliding

user12: KJFGHJFGHKJDFGNKJNFG

user2: well thank goodness you stayed calm

user8: so what im learning from this is if i talk about my crush enough,,, i'll get to meet them

user12: the all brown leather is serving so hard its insane

user13: they should just put her on stage instead of the cars.. i'd rather watch that

ynuser has made a post

liked by estebanocon, lewishamilton, lando, tomholland2013, marvel, sabrinacarpenter, oliviarodrigo, and 2,432,758 others

ynuser: what a wonderful weekend in london

view all comments

tatemcrae: you’re a literal goddess

ynuser: you're the literal love of my life

user4: mamacita

f1: always great to see you! [liked by ynuser]

user31: WHO gave you those flowers? quick esteban look away

user2: maybe it WAS esteban who gave her the flowers!!

user8: didnt they like just meet like 72 hours ago?

user2: yes but like they could have hit it off!!!

user31: ya know what user2..... maybe you're on to something

user8: y'all can't be normal abt nothin huh

ynfan: who is esteban?

user9: oh boy

estebanocon: was a pleasure meeting you!

ynuser: right back at you! 🌹

user2: omg she responded someone check on estie

user10: oh that last slide feels intentional...the black and red like haas.....noticing things......

lewishamilton: missed you my friend

ynuser: missed you more lew

user5: looks like im getting into f1 now

ynuser has posted to their story

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user1: i promise whatever the person who is getting to take you out is offering,,,, i can do one better 😭😭😭😭

lando: 👀

ynuser: 🤨

user14: pls just one chance ��

estebanocon: mon dieu you looked incredible tonight. thank you for a wonderful evening y/n/n

ynuser: thank you esteban! you looked quite handsome yourself

ynuser: let me know if this is too much but… i’d really like to keep seeing you

estebanocon: too much?? don’t be silly y/n. i’d love nothing more

ynuser: thank god - i was a bit nervous you wouldn’t be interested

estebanocon: have you not seen the multiple interviews of me publicly crushing on you? 😅😅😅😅

ynuser: hahahaa i have but still

estebanocon: no buts

estebanocon: wanna come watch me race in melbourne?

yourbff: what is this????? details immediately???

ynuser: you know how i went to that f1 event? well one of the vroom vroom guys was confident enough to ask me to grab drinks and he just was so incredibly handsome so i said yes…. and then at drinks he bewitched me with his french charm and now we went to dinner and i think i might like him like him

yourbff: you know what … i think being a wag suits you honestly

user22: feeling like montoya rn

tatemcrae: PAUSE! are you on a date?

ynuser: yes

tatemcrae: CALL ME RN

user25: idk how to bounce back from this ill be fr

ynuser has posted to their story

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user4: chat we’ve lost her

tatemcrae: i can't believe this

ynuser: neither can i ... honestly i never thought the day would come where i found a partner that was willing to put up with all the craziness that i bring to the table but he's so incredible

tatemcrae: literally could cry rn. i am endlessly happy for you y/n!!! you deserve nothing but happiness

user2: AUSGP YOURE GOING TO THE AUSGP I JUST KNOW IT

lewishamilton: roscoe is wondering where his thank you treats are for making this happen

ynuser: roscoe or you?

lewishamilton: both

ynuser: i'll bring them to the paddock 😉

user19: adding melbourne to my bucket list rn

estebanocon: oh mon ange, we are in soft launch territory now?

ynuser: yes! you said that was ok? 😫😫 i can take it down!!!

estebanocon: yes mon amor! just teasing you 😘

user31: you can't tell me thats not esteban ocon omg

lance_stroll: was wonderful to meet you this evening!

ynuser: it was a pleasure meeting you!!! let's hang out more xxoo

ynuser has made a post

liked by estebanocon, haasf1team, lance_stroll, tatemcrae, zendaya, tomholland2013, jackhughes, and 2,987,345 others

ynuser: oh but you've got a sports car

view all comments

user2: is this supposed to be a soft launch bc you ain't slick girl ik that’s esteban’s car

tatemcrae: while you drive it real far 😉

lando: uhhh hey... while you're here.....

ynuser: good bye lando!

user18: literally sick with jealousy

estebanocon: ❤️

ynuser: 🤍

ynfan1: yup alright im into f1 now too

haasf1team: thanks for joining us y/n! black and red are your colors 😍

ynuser: i think so too

user24: i’d like to thank beyoncé for y/n’s appearance at the ausgp

roscoelovescoco: come to silverstones toos!! i misses yous

ynuser: anything for you my love

user43: i seriously have no one to talk to abt this and im about to crash out

user87: join f1twt and you will

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

a/n: thanks for reading!! likes and reblogs appreciated!! lmk if you’d like more estie fics- i’ve noticed he doesn’t get a lot of love on here 🫶🏻

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction

© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform

[asmogorna]

Ok so for the last couple days ive been ill in the head about The Black Parade as mcr's alter ego/characters and i wanted to share some thoughts i had so far :3

It doesnt align with the canon lore that we have (i didnt really use it for reference at least) so it can be viewed as some sort of an au

I dont know if im gonna give them new names that just sound similar to the names of mcr themselves, so for now i will be referring to them by the names of the band members

So far I've been thinking about the typical "chosen by fate" scenario, where the characters lives lead them through a path for a specific cause

So

Post WW2 England

5 kids under their own circumstances witness a big parade (I will be doing some research and see if it could be some kind of victory celebration parade? It's just that I'm not sure if England had those. Not that I'm aiming for historical accuracy atp it's simple curiosity)

The kids get heavily impacted by that event and carry on (ha) that memory throughout their life

Now to the specifics of the characters cus by God they all gave me a headache

Heads up: they're all british orphans lol

Frank and Bob are students/residents in a Christian orphan school, and later on in life are priests in the town church

The reason why is that they both have badges on their uniform with crosses that could be associated with christianity

(I couldn't find any info about what exactly certain design details could be referencing, so ig it's up to interpretation)

The military theme in Gerard and Mikey's costumes will be explored on later (Mikey's medal could be either The Victoria Cross or The Distinguished Flying Cross, and the symbol on Gerard's shoulder is most likely the Order Of The Garter star)

And I couldn't figure out what to do w Ray, because I'm not sure if his uniform design details reference anything specific 🤷🏾🤷🏾🤷🏾

Now, Gerard and Mikey lost their father to war, and their mother passed away when they were both very young

And after that they ended up in the same orphanage as Ray, befriending him and finding out about their shared passion for music

This doodle was made abt that specifically <3

Later on in early adulthood they decide to start a cabaret band, in which Frank and Bob both join them later, deciding to leave their priest lives behind (partially because iirc both of them kinda fanboyed their way into the band irl lol)

After receiving little recognition, the band decides to take a train to America, to try their luck there. With a lot of hope and determination

That, sadly, doesn't last for long, for the train crushes with no survivors on board

The group crawls out of the collapsed train in their no longer physical forms. Yet, even after their death, they still have a desire to move forward. And that desire, though thoughtlessly, forces them to go forward. The souls of all the other people who lost their lives to the train accident follow them, through the landscape that no longer feels like earth

They then reach the end

Walking in one by one people disappear, finding their own peace and meeting their own finish line

After it's done, The Black Parade now have officially made themselves into what they're supposed to be. Gaining a new purpose and a new sort of life

I got too poetic for my own good here I fear .. anyway

Their job now is to lead the lost and the forgotten to the afterlife

They could be referred to as some kind of a grim reaper, I guess

I'm still thinking about adding more to the story, and maybe I will change some things, but so far this is all I can share really !! I hope if you've read this far you found this entertaining .. this is all for the satisfaction of my urges so I might or might not have too much fun w it in the future :3

The story was mainly inspired by this specific post from Gerard himself, because i liked the concept a lot ..

Also

She's gonna be here as a separate character too probably...... Cus I'm self indulgent and I love the ideas bubbling in my brain

[shamelessfaceless]

Love, Pain, Death, Repeat II

Navigation | Marvel Masterlist | Part I

Pairings: Dark!Wanda Maximoff x F!Reader, Billy and Tommy Maximoff x Mom!Reader, Agatha Harkness x F!Reader (platonic)

Summary: Why can't you understand? You were hers, and you will always be hers. You are her solemate. What you don’t understand?

Warnings: Dark!Wanda, mention of cheating, mention of death and suicide, stockholm syndrome (not sure about this one)

Wc: 1550

A/n: Im looking for beta reader (i dont have friends for this😔).

Btw If you saw other post i published before this.. NO YOU DIDNT. It was a dream, and lets keep it that way <333

“Boys, go downstairs, I think mommy doesn't feel very well and I need to take care of her today.” Her voice is soft, opposite of what you heard last time you saw her.

Your kids, you assumed, get off you. One in a green shirt whispered something to the other one, and they started running. They looked like a perfect mix of you and your ex. Something you really wanted to have. Even as you were younger you always wanted to have your prince charming, and few kids. After a few years, the only thing that changed was prince to princess.

“Why I am here? Is this hell?” After learning that Wanda cheated on you, you started feeling like you don’t deserve love or even kids.

“Aren’t you happy? We can have everything we want here! No Natasha, no Vision, no other people we know.” You looked at her disgusted. She made you believe that you’re not enough, and now she wants to build a dream, more like a nightmare to you, about you and her and your kids.

“Why me? Why not him?!” In a second she was next to you, her hand on your mouth.

“Keep that mouth of yours quieter. We Don't want boys to be suspicious, right?” Her green eyes always made you melt, and she kept her hand on your face. You wanted to give in, but decided to push her away. “Behave” She mumbled sitting next to you.

“Tell me, why me? He truly loved you, as much as a bunch of wires could love someone.” She started stroking your hair.

“It was all just about mind stone, it was all that made me interested in him. I needed to understand this, you are my true love.” Tears falling from her eyes. You couldn’t decide if they were real, or she only wanted to make you forgive her.

You faced the wall not wanting to look at her any longer. She left without saying anything more, after a while she came back and left breakfast on the bed. You were scared to eat it. Who knows if she didn't poisoned it. After a few days of staying in the room and only going to the toilet you decided to finally go to the kitchen to fix yourself something to eat and come back to the bedroom. You started learning her routine, most of the day she wasn’t at home. Taking boys to the school, and going straight after that to work. Boys.. Tommy and Billy, you learned their names yesterday, are coming back from school by foot. Wanda always comes back in the evenings. You need to share bed with her. Feeling her hands on your body makes you feel disgusted and at the same time safe.

“Mommy! Do you feel better now?” Little boy asked. You feel teats building in your eyes, as you looked in his own, almost the same color as yours. Every look at boys is tearing down your walls. Every look at them makes you question what you protect yourself from?

“Yeah Tommy, Mommy feels better now. Do you and your brother want something to eat?”

“Mom was giving us money to buy food at and after school.” He confessed. “But.. Today I bought something else.

“ Tom…”

“But wait!” He runned to his room and came back as fast as he could. Holding something behind his back he looked at you with puppy eyes. “Please don’t be mad, I just… I wanted to buy you this! “He gave you a few flowers. Your favorite flowers. “I wanted to make you feel better, and mom told me you love these!”

You wanted to cry really hard. Feeling a knot in your throat you decided to kiss his forehead and take flowers. You put them in the first vase you saw and started searching for things for pancakes.

When Wanda came back home, the first thing that hitted her was the smell, and just a while later boys came running to her, mouths full of food, and telling her you made them pancakes. She smiled nodding at their words. Everything she could think of was you, and how close she must be to finally break you.

Day after day, you were getting closer to the boys. To Wanda you were closer to breaking point. You even started making dinners for boys. For them you even started learning how to cook. After a few weeks of making dinner only for them you also started leaving something to eat for Wanda. You could not talk to her, but you didn't want her to make herself food after a long day of work, and the voice inside your head wanted her to tell you how good your dishes are, how proud of you she is. Today you decided to bake pizza. Boys wanted to help you but it ended up in flour fight.

“And how will I clean it?” You asked looking at Tommy who has all his hair white, and Billy who has his face in white powder.

“Well, mom can help!” Said Billy.

“Well, maybe I can.” Her voice made you shiver. You looked at the clock, she was home earlier. “Boys, go clean yourself before you eat, maybe we can even watch something together.” They hugged her and speeded to the bathroom.

You wanted to call for them to come back. Staying with Wanda in one room was the last thing you wanted to do right now. After the conversation on the first day you woke up here, you never talked. You didn’t want to hear her voice, you were scared. Not only things she could say, but you could actually brake and fall in her arms.

“What do you say sweet girl, want my help?” She gets closer to you. “Or you maybe want to help you also with something else?” You felt her knee between your legs. Oh how long you weren’t touched down there. Knocking on the door saved you from answering. Wanda only huffed and went to see who disturbed her.

“Hey sweetie! I just wanted to ask if you have some sugar. You know, it's late, and all the shops are closed.” After a while an older woman came into the kitchen.

“Love, why don’t you give our neighbor some sugar.” Wanda said. You only nodded. After a few seconds you were handing a stranger a cup of sugar.

“Thanks honey, oh, i forgot to introduce myself, Im Agatha” She said sweetly. You felt hope, maybe she also knows this world is fake. Maybe if you and her get to know each other you could stop Wanda. You saw a spark of hope and didn’t want to give up not now. But Wanda answered faster than you could think about anything you could say.

“And that's Y/N, she's not very talkative, selective mutism.” She lied without stuttering. You hated her almost the same as you loved her. You couldn't fully hate her, everyone but not her.

You looked into the woman's eyes with a pleading look. You didn’t care Wanda could see that, you only hoped Agatha would understand you. Soon the dark haired woman left and Wanda was again next to you. Her face is millimeters of yours.

“What would you say If I give you another child, hm? You weren’t here when boys were small. “Her lips are almost touching yours.”

“Ew! Moms!”

You were glad Billy finally came back. Thanks to your luck for saving you from Wanda twice. Rest of the evening went nice. You fell asleep while watching a movie. Every night you hoped that she would spare you, she would finally give up and let you be free. Oh how wrong you were. Wanda had plans for you, she needed her pretty girl, and no one could change her plans.

Agatha came a few times when Wanda wasn’t at home. You talked to her trying to see if she also knows if this whole world is fake. When you weren’t sure and asked her about this, she said she knew very well about what Wanda did, she wanted to save you. And she tried. You had everything planned, everything seemed so easy. But one day Agatha disappeared. She no longer came to your house, she wasn’t at home. After a few weeks new neighbors moved in. 

And the day when you couldn't take it anymore came earlier than you expected. When Agatha wasn't there anymore you lost your last hope. No one could help you. There was no one else knowing about what Maximoff did. When you opened your eyes and saw the mother of your childs getting ready to work you had decided. Slowly going behind her you hugged her. 

“Thank you for what you did for us Wands”

[inumakis-boo]

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ ur text (inumaki toge) ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .

synopsis ␥ you give toge inumaki your phone number, and you become addicted to your phone, and him (for all good reasons). major fluff + friends ↝ lovers.

version one out of three. Enjoy!

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ .

When you first started texting toge inumaki, if you were totally honest, you werent entirely sure how it was going to go.

You had only caught the subtle hints of his personality during the rare times you saw him in person- and obviously, it was through tone and face expression, becaude most other ways well were.. not optional.

So.. when you finally got the courage to write down your number on a slip of a yellow post-it note, you didn't know exactly what to expect. Just because you thought he might be a cool guy, doesn't mean he might feel the same about you. He may be cool only around people he is used to training with, or is in the same field-level at him.

But his eyes grazed over the neat handwriting (you mustve written the same note about six different times before handing it over), and his looked back at you with smiling eyes, and a thumbs up.

you tried not to wait up all night for the text- why were you so nervous? it was just a phone number, you had given it to everyone basically on campus. he was just the last one.. because you were too nervous to actually give it over.

the phone had dinged you awake from an after school nap, and you groggily picked it up, expecting nothing more than the student group-chat aruging again, but found an unsaved number with nothing more than-

UNSAVED NUMBER: it's inumaki, you gave me ur phone number the other day

UNSAVED NUMBER: idk if you remember haha srry if this is bothering u but i didnt see u at dinner, did u eat?

you try your best to blink out of the sleepiness from your eyes, trying to gauge what you wanted to say.

YOU: hi, and no i didnt forget 🤙🏻

YOU: no i was sleeping, i mustve missed it oops

He had read it almost immediately, which was.. honestly refreshing.

UNSAVED NUMBER: we thought so, so i hope you enjoy whats outside ur door

What? Outside the door? You climbed out of bed, and slowly creeped the door open-

Nobody was out here? Was someone supposed to be coming?

You look down the hall both ways before looking down. A small bag, tied closed, sitting perfectly infront of your door. When you pick it up, the bag is still warm, so it must not have been there for too long.

When you return to your phone, you see even more messages.

UNSAVED NUMBER: everyone thought it was a good idea so you dont miss dinner cause we be doing too much shit to miss out on food

He was right about that one; the days of training and missions had not gotten any easier, and energy was too important to start losing.

YOU: thank you, but how did you know where my room was?

UNSAVED NUMBER: tis a secret

UNSAVED NUMBER: wait that sounds horrible i promise im not a stalker

UNSAVED NUMBER: i just asked someone if they knew

YOU: that kinda sounds like what a stalker would say T-T

UNSAVED NUMBER: NOOOO IM SORRY forget what i said, eat well pls, gn!!

Ah, so under his collar, he was just.. a normal guy.

A funny one at that, with a personality? Nearly shocking for boys your age. The food was good too, with the

When you tell Itadori about last nights dinner, he raises his eyebrows in surprise.

"Huh, he made you that?" He asks, lips pursed a little. "Thats cool."

"What did everyone else have?" You ask him, as you two both put on your shoes from the school lockers.

"Inumaki made a different dish, a soup."

You had nothing like that- you got salmon and onigiri.

"Huh, thats not surprising." He says after you tell him, "Thats his favorite."

He.. had made you his favorite? and like.. actually made it for you, not just bought whatever from a store. He made something completely different- lighter accounting it being almost bedtime?

So.. he was considerate too.

—

After that, it didn't take long for the messages began to roll back and forth.

What turned from appreciation for his cooking, turned into meme sharing and tiktok sending, then.. into photos, of homework, of a cat brushing up against his leg on the street, a aisle of snacks, asking for what you want. In return, he got imessage games, where he would never lose, opinions on video games and shows, and hypothetical questions about his curse.

YOU: so lets say ur playing a video game

INUDUMBASS: which one

YOU: literally not important, anything competitive

YOU: anyways, ur playing right in a voice chat

INUDUMBASS: yes go on 🙄

YOU: and you start losing, can you say anything

INUDUMBASS: i try not to actively kill people on the mic so no

INUDUMBASS: it will still go through 100%

YOU: nobody said u had to tell someone to do that 😭

INUDUMBASS: clearly you have not been around anybody who is losing in a game before

YOU: god are u rlly that cringy??

INUDUMBASS: are you just finding this out??

INUDUMBASS: and no, i wouldn't ever do that kind of thing, i do have self-control, yknow

YOU: mhm totally

And maybe he did for online players, but he would not hesistate to make the phone drop out of your hands in the lunch room as you two played 8-ball from opposite sides of the table, just to fuck up your aim as you made a winning shot, turning the game over to his benefit.

It's okay, because you got your revenge pulling out the chair from underneath him, and watching him smack his ass on the hard school-floor, and resist not cursing in pain. He would still smile at you- eventually afterwards. He would roll his eyes, but accept the fair play anyways.

It was painfully obvious to everyone else that you two had something going on.

And maybe you didn't realize how much you were admiring him until the personality in his messages shone in him in reality.

Of course, communication was inconvenient but Inumaki wasn't dumb. One eye look told you everything you needed to know. He would snicker at Itadori's occasional mishap while training, then immediately lock in for his own, all the while never sending a mishaped word out of his mouth. And never using more of his curse than needed. Everyone knew he was trustworthy.

Nearly once a day, if he could, he made food (you thought about the first time he made it for you, specially for you, and it makes all his food taste even sweeter) and you watched everyone enjoy it, then noticed as he helped clean up- even though Maki and Megumi urged him to sit. Self-less, kind.

It was really the time on a friday night, after such a long week that everyone decided to ditch the movie theater to instead use the lounges tv (thanks to gojo, was totally decked out for the students), that maybe you start to notice Inumaki- really notice him.

You had been sitting on the food at one end of the long couches, as Toge sat at the other end, his legs draped over the arm rest as he rested his right side against the backrest.

You honestly don't know why you even kept on looking- it wasn't even that serious of a movie, yet he was so intently watching, sweatshirt not big enough to cover the usual half of his face, revealing the thin inky marks on his cheeks, leading to his lips.

He was biting the inside of his lower lip as he watched, probably an old habit back from when he was a kid- he had always been like this, he mentioned once. His arms were lazily crosed, and even his hair had been pushed so strands flicked upwards in tusseled ccondition. His greyish-violet eyes were reflecting all the action scenes, so relaxed but also, analyzing.

For the briefiest moment, you wished it was you that was sitting next to him, not Maki.

Or, the rest of the night, as you tried to focus on the movies, with your arms wrapped around your knees.

It was so odd to think weeks had passed, and suddenly, a boy that you had never known before and were scared to know, had become such a phenomenon in your life. A sustainable source of kindness and excitement that came from a boy that didn't even speak full sentences.

He made your heart flutter. As embarssing as it is. Would probably say it was embarssing, if he knew. Not like it was really ever that serious, right?

You two were friends, maybe an odd pair, but at the very least, very good classmates, and at the best, two people that loved to bully each other and talk even when words were a non-possibility.

—

TOGE: hey btw, you looked great tn.

YOU: lmao i looked like a bum

TOGE: well even if you did, it looked cute

TOGE: anyways, ima going tobed, im sleepy,, night night

was this really all in your head?

YOU: night night, toge :)

TOGE: :)))

It had to be.

The next morning was going to prove difficult for that insanity plea;

TOGE: i have nothing planned for today

YOU: you should be studying 😭

TOGE: nah, i should be hanging out with you

YOU: this is hanging out with me

TOGE: no like, hang out hang out

YOU: where? its too hot outside today

TOGE: in my dorm then?

YOU: with who?

TOGE: with you??

TOGE: At six, you should come hang with me, itll be fun

You swallow as you look down at your phone screen, and take your bottom lip between your teeth. That same feeling was coming back, but not out of any of the reasons before. This felt different. An excited giddiness with freckles of nervousness.

YOU: as long as you got the snacks, i wont miss it

TOGE: ill buy the whole store for you

Ahaha.. so funny right?

Somehow, it was starting to feel like the real joke was how well you were fooling yourself into thinking this was just friendly banter.

You found yourself showering and picking out a comfy outfit, braiding your hair and carefully selecting a perfume. You nearly caught yourself trying to replay the memory of getting dressed the night of the movie-party.

"hey btw, you looked great-"

You wish he could tell you to just stop thinking, would be doing you a huge solid. Especially as you approach his room, which you had found yourself wondering what was on the other side, when the boy stepped out from the door frame.

"Konbu." He waved, with a warm smile. His hair was pushed back from his face a little, and he had a white sleepshirt on, with some baggy grey sweatpants.

"Hi, Toge." You had never really called him by his first name before, and if he thought negatively, the small smile reaching his eyes disobeyed the thought.

He stepped aside and let you take your first look into the room- maybe you had not thought about it so hard, but it somehow made sense.

Band posters on some of the walls, poor taken photos of the second years and first years all together taped there too, an occasional plant dangling off a book shelf or window sill, a dresser, a little worn with character, sits nearby with a tv angled on its edge, towards the bed for easy viewing. A PS4 sits behind it, along with a headset, with the mic turned away from the front.

He has books sitting on his desk, an old fashioned hand-carry radio sits on one of its edges, and it makes for also a side table to his bed, sitting on a metal bedframe with blankets and infamous navy bedsheets.

Its springing with his character, and the smell of a refreshing cologne is in the air- the same type she would catch sometimes lingering as he walked by.

"Its not what I expected."

He walked by her to sit at his spinning desk chair, turning to face her. "Salmon?" He inquires.

"Well yeah, its just your style. With the uniform and your curse, it might not be so obvious to other people who don't know you."

He leaned back in the chair and looked up interestedly at the ceiling. Was that rude to say?

He takes out his phone, and a quick second later, presents the phone screen to you, opened to the notes app.

/i never thought abt it like that/

/well, i mean, i have but im glad you understand it, kinda impressive that you figured it out/

/or im just easily readable/

"That would be a good thing, right?" You leave the phone screen on, but puts it away from your view. "That your friends get to read you, despite everything. That means youve gotten good at what you do.."

Toge's lips quirk to one side as he thinks, and your eyes watch as his marks follow the corners.

He raises his hand to get a wishy-washy motion, and you furrow your brows. When he types, he stops you from picking up your phone aswell, only to present what hes wrote in the text box.

/Well, kinda. no matter what I do to express myself, its kinda hard to be fully understood. i miss out on a huge part of everyday life, even if people understand what idea im trying to get across, its atypical./

/no amount of tone or facial expression can amount to words and their complex meanings. i think i am actually really lucky that my curse does not extend to messages- i think id be screwed./

"I don't think its too different to what people really feel like though." You explain to listening ears. "Most people felt like they aren't totally understood, that people just don't get them totally.. but I understand that, you don't have much of a choice, and we take advantage of what we can do sometimes."

You watch his face change a little to settle on your features more- and you feel yourself being pulled into his attention.

"I think even if your curse had taken away your ability to communicate in ways you do now, youre still worth knowing, Toge. I think everyone agrees."

His eyes soften, and it nearly strikes your heart into a million pieces. His smile too, could he be anymore cute? He wasn't hiding it this time. He shows how much he appreciates your words in the flush of his cheeks and the way his palms meet together.

He lets out a relaxing sigh, and looks away, then his eyes light up to bags sitting by the bedside.

"Sujiko." He urges to look, pointing to the grocery bag, which seems to be loaded with stuff. You walk closer and grab it, then find yourself sitting down quietly on the side of his bed.

The bag is full of snacks and drinks, some previously mentioned in chats, like he had written them all down, and got them for you to see.

"You bought the whole store, huh?" You raised an eyebrow playfully.

A grin and a happy thumbs up in return.

As promised.

You spend the next few hours bambling about his bedroom, looking through all the semi-decent hidden school papers, and letting him explain all the pictures on the wall.

He explained things thoroughly, like each detail was inside of him, kept for safekeeping. His eyes would light up in such appreciation, and it almost felt natural when you were caught in his gaze. Like he could keep you for safekeeping too.

Of course, his PlayStation was clean and ready for use, and by the time you two had gotten the controllers out and opened Ramune bottles, the sunlight was long gone. Outside was quiet, but you two didn't care much as you two sat together, him letting you sit on the bed while he took the floor. Glaringly bright flashes of action splattered against the postered walls, and more than once, your playful nudge with your foot against his arm to mess up caused much whining and laughter alike.

His laughter was like an entirely different language, speaking of his delight. It was not a rarity, but still a treasure. It is infectious and only serves to remind you that he is just a teenager, and he is having so well-deserved fun.

Eventually, Maki knocked against the wall and shouted through muffled barriers "Inumaki, be quiet, I am trying to sleep!" the sound alarmed them both, but only created further snickering.

But, they turned off the game in a half-apology and instead put on some horror flick that was on a student-shared Hulu account, and you both settle down eating gummi worms and flavored popcorn.

Maybe it was being distracted by having such a good time, it takes the calm before the storm of the horror movie to realize Toge and you have gotten really comfortable on his bed, backs against his pillows. They smell like his shampoo.. or maybe you are just close enough to smell it off of him. It's soft, comfortable, and clean, and something new to your senses.

He is warm, you can tell. His body is close enough, legs crossed as they lay straight down on top of the duvet, but his arm supports his head, and is behind you on the pillow. He seems semi-entertained (of course, you had challenged him to watch a horror movie.. but maybe challenging a Jujutsu Sorcerer to not get scared was faulty logic. There were scarier things than makeup and bad wigs.)

You didn't wanna look at your phone- you didn't want to see the time and be guilty for staying so long, you knew it must be close to midnight. Would he tell you that you should go to sleep? Would he bring you back to your dorm and say goodbye at the door?

Ignoring the time for the sake of Toge's soft cologne and sheets? Sounded pretty selfish, although it made your stomach flutter.

"Am I keeping you awake?" It comes out as a whisper, and you lean in closer.

"Bonito flakes." He whispered back swiftly with a head shake no, tearing his eyes from the screen to you. He smiles a little, charmingly, as the flecks of violet in his eyes flash with the TV screen. This was the first time you saw them in all their detail, and it makes your heart skip a beat.

When you both turn away from each other, you can feel his arm shift from his face, and around the pillow you were laying on. It makes you shift inevitably closer.

His shirt bunches towards the side he is lying on, revealing the sliver of skin between the hem and the top of his sweatpants, toned and pale in the soft light. You try not to stare.

It makes you think. Was thing.. flirting?

Was the attraction to the cursed speech user simmering ever since the first message? Since the first time you saw him at the beginning of the school year?

Would anybody blame you? All those times when there was nothing to be scared of when he proved nothing less than just a great friend, kind, playful, selfless, and strong?

You knew that would never change- for as long as he was here and breathing. He wanted everyone to know that's who he was.

Who would blame you, as you let the feeling ride with sliding your hand to the middle of his chest? His white sleepshirt is soft after many rounds of wash, but what is even better is resting your cheek against his shoulder, right at the top where his arm meets, and you can feel his eyes glance at you. It feels like such a relief, although you wonder if this is really normal to be happy about.

"Is this okay?" You whisper.

In response, his hand slips away from the distance on the pillow behind you, and the pads of his fingers rest on your arm, hugging you slightly closer.

"Mhm." He hums in approval quietly, and his fingertips graze your soft skin, up and down slowly. "Salmon."

This tango had endured until the near end of the movie, yet you could barely pay attention to any of the plots because Toge was holding you so securely, and letting you trace circles on the middle of his chest, and the sound of his deep breaths were overtaking your thoughts anyways rather than the fake monster on screen.

You are nearly ready to close your eyes, when you can feel a squeeze on your arm, and when you open your eyes, you can see the same notes app in dark mode, with something written out.

/Are you tired?/

"N-No, not yet." You look at the time at the top of the screen. 12:49 am.

He seems amused by that, raising an eyebrow.

"You're just comfortable." You say as you both totally ignore the last few minutes of the movie. "It's nice being with you."

Toge looks at you like he wants to say something, pursing his lips as he smiles and glances away for a moment.

Is your heart racing? This is the best you've felt in weeks. Why does it feel like your stomach is fluttering?

He presents his notes again, and you honestly wish he could say them himself.

/When we first met, I honestly wouldn't think we would be so close. I am really happy we are. I feel like now is a good time to tell u, since we are alone./

Your cheeks feel like they are burning, and its your turn to look away in feble attempt to hide the flush arising.

"I am happy too." You begin to explain, "You're.. you're fun and kind.. you have always been so nice to me and listen to me snore on about classes and training. You watch all the stupid tiktoks I send you and ask for my opinions. I always feel like you notice everything and youre trustworthy. I can.. only hope that I am half as genuine to you as you are to me."

Toge nods in confirmation. It makes you feel like you're on fire, and the background music with the black credits screen cannot even pull your attention from him.

His chest was rising and falling right below your fingertips, and his face slowly focused on you, the tension feels so good and thick, that you honestly wonder how much longer you will convince yourself that normal friendships feel like this.

He was always honest with you. He deserved it in return, but it might be the most vulnerable you've been in years. He deserved that too- he had never held anything back.

"I think I like you."

The words leave your mouth before you even have a chance to smack yourself into reality. Instead, they sit between the darkness and him.

"More than just being friends."

His grip loosens just a tad, and panic seems to run through your body- he was not interested, you had completely misunderstood the situation.

"I-Im sorry-" You take your hands away and try your best to sit up from practically lying down. You were in a boys room, what were you thinking? You should get some space from him, so he doesn't think you a total freak. "I didn't-"

You can feel a tight bond around your wrist, keeping you right where you sit, and when you whip your head back, his eyes are wide with interest and warmth that you want to melt into a puddle of dumb choices. He opens his mouth, maybe to try to say something, but he considers it over and over again. When he feels sure you wont go, he lets go.

He raises a finger to his eye-

I.

both hands cover the center of his chest, cusping it almost-

Heart.

Finally, one last finger. Pointed at-

You..

Was he trying to say.. I like you?

Your body relaxes finally, and the urge to run away is still lingering, but you can't honestly say you want to. Not with how his eyes are flattering with some kind of emotion, his arms opening.

You can't hold back any longer. Your arms swiftly move around his neck as you envelop him so closely, and he instantly hugs you back, pulling you so close your lips meet the skin of his neck. He sounds like he is humming, his hands rubbing your back soothingly. You sit an appreciate his scent, the feeling of his skin, his warmth, for just a moment or two longer until he slowly departs from you, searching your face for any further comment.

"That's really.. really good to hear." You sigh out, with a bit of a smile, reaching to rub a weary eye; you realize he has taken your hand in the process.

He offers his own hand, letting it rub the corner were some wetness at resided, before letting the rest of his finger skin around you hairline, then through your strands of hair. He follows each motion, as he tries to comfort you.

Your hand reaches to sit atop his, and although its late and if someone knew you two were here together, not only would it at the very least be a detention and school clean up duty and at the very best, be a rumor the other students would talk about, despite this you honestly didn't care when the perfect boy was sitting right infront of you, with tussled hair and red lips, just like that night during the movie-party.

"I know its late." She started to say, but he quickly took out his phone again. "I won't keep you up anymore."

/you keep me up no matter what./

/atleast here i get to hear your pretty voice and see your face./

"What do you think about.. when you think of me?" You needed to know what he had been thinking of you all this time.

Instead of using his phone, his hands gently present themselves, and touch parts of your body chastely.

His hands travel from your palm, fingers skimming past your veins in a kind of silent poetry-

Your scars.. your freckles, your strength, your sunkissed summertime skin.

Then, he brushes past your shoulder to twirl around with your hair-

your beauty, the way you attract people.

Then up your face to your temple-

Your brain, your mind.

Then your cheeks-

Your flush, your sweet smiles.

Finally, the pad of his thumb grazes against your chin, right below your lower lip.

The way you speak, the way you are.

You can feel the urge in him, radiating off his lidded eyes and hesistant touch, quietly as he landscapes your being.

"You can, yknow." His eyes look up towards your gaze, "If you want too. If you are ready, of course-"

"Please," The words stilled you instantly, yet he continued holding your face more tenderly. They were soft and yet thick. "Kiss me."

The curse enacted on you, and although for a brief flash there was some concern in his face that perhaps it was too soon, quickly was dismissed when he saw you come closer by the help of his hand, and for just a moment held the proximity between your pairs of lips before slowly pressing close, your lips gently against his.

It was chaste and quiet on the outside, but it was like adding more gunpower to an already lit firework, the explosion of emotion surging your veins making you never wanting to leave.

His thumb was caressing the side of your cheek, it was making you dizzy with his attention. It was everything you had hoped for the moment you had even thought of him- to be close in every single way, to know every part of the perfect, strong, peaceful boy that you so clearly saw every day.

It felt like a dream, but at the very least, hoped you would wake up on his chest, with the Playstation off and the soft breathing of your boy in the air.

But instead, youre both here, and he is kissing you like he has won the lottery.

You both smile, until you couldn't tell when the kiss ended, and where the laughter began.

Surely, he was smart and kind and self-less and strong and all those things youd toss about in your mind at night.

But the idea that this may have never happened because you were too shy to say hello to the usually quiet and calm boy, made you feel like the stupidest yet luckiest girl in the world.

Maybe it was you that had won the jackpot, just by giving away a simple yellow post-it note.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . . ݁₊

thank you so much for reading! this is only ending one. i have plans for a nsfw verison and an misunderstanding verison. please let me know if any of yall are interested!

see you later pookies!

[ma4chestier]

hey, remember when I thought literally no one was talking about umemiya's backstory's backstory?? yeah, well this guy @loganelfreeces just opened my eyes with the most insane analysis I've ever seen, bc these characters appear in less than two chapters and I'm not really the kind to overanalyze stuff but this made me think more than Im used to and I'm grateful for it.

seriously, if you havent read their post please go, its amazing!! what I'm about to say its practically just a response to what they were saying so I recommend reading it either wya

first off i want to start saying that i cant shake the feeling that umemiya and shitara share the same personality in the sense that they act all friendly and goofy to protect others from unnecessary trouble, like if we're talking about how umemiya acts i can tell he somehow copied or adapted himself to shitara's sense of responsability when it comes to emotional support

then there's that conversation shitara has with the other caretaker about the old furin, and i did get the feeling that shitara was talking about himself in some way, tho i wasnt sure if he had been a furin student, but just some acquaintance to the people there. him being a former student makes sense given that he knows a lot about furin insights and takes responsability on what they do around town

i can see shitara playing a major role in the future, but since the last time qe saw him was when umemiya was 14 years old, i hardly think we will see him again, OR as you pointed out, when umemiya graduates.

if im not wrong, it has been aprox five months (?) sicne sakura entered furin, so i think we're close to that

the one person i really dont think will appear again is umemiya's savior. why? because he couldn't see his face, it wasnt shown, we didnt got a name, not even a nickname, and as you were saying, he's an adult probably out of town that will never appear again

it will be one hell of a twist if the savior happens to be related to someone else, like being suo's martial artist brother or sakura's acquaintance, but i hardly believe he will appear again. yes he was influential in the story, and yes he shared with us some very important information about the old furin, but that was his role at the moment, and the story was going on about umemiya and shitara.

so, yes, shitara will probably appear again in some important scene, and no, the savior will probably not appear ever again

and IF we're talking about a third party, the other guy shitara and the savior mentioned, I hardly believe they will give us more insight on this. there's still a high chance this will get more focus in the series as the events starts to unfold in something more large. i think, if anything, nirei can crack the code of this mysterious saviors and the old furin secrets, I believe in my notebook guy!! (tho I really like how you connected the "serious/calm and goofy/loud" duo, it makes total sense)

OTHER THING THAT I REALIZED I THOUGHT YOUVE POINTED OUT BUT TURNS OUT I JUST IMAGIEND was that shitara and the other girl mention that because of all the gangs messing up the town the police had turned a blind eye to all these and left the town without doing their proper job, so that lefts us with no reliable adults available to put a stop to those crimes. there's no teachers in furin even tho its a school. the townsfolk rely on the furin boys. there's hardly any picture of parents anywhere, not even in conversations. shitara is the first adult to be relied on by someone in the entire series, and i think that alone says a lot about the guy and the future of the series in general.

I BELEIVE IN NII-SENSEI TO GIVE US AN ASNWER TO ALL THESE, THEY'RE AMAZING ON WHAT THEIR DOING AND I CANT WAIT HOW ALL THESE TURNS OUT!!

aAaaAaA im done.

[dottybot]

Lost housing and almost killed by our landlords

(Twice)

C*sh app: $dottybot

V*nmo: @dottybot

@translesbo's Paypal: huront499@gmail.com

My partner, @translesbo, and I after signing a lease, were put through 2 big gas leaks during times we had planned on and had been close to sleeping in the apartment. The entire time the place made us sick and was hard to breathe in with a strong awful smell and remained unihabitable, causing us to be without a home since July 3rd, 2023 due to it.

We are a brown latine lesbian couple and both trans (her transfem and myself tme cafab) and autistic along with other disabilities, and have 2 esa cats.

The whole time during the lease, the landlord would excuse the lack of cleanliness and poor maintenance of the building with that it was an old building, deny things she once acknowledge, and imply that we were just lying or causing the problems and even giving us trouble with getting out of the lease. But before that it led up to 2 big gas leaks.

To not make the post appear too lengthy, the rest is under a cut.

So the 1st gas leak, we were earlier sure about taking and about to load up the cats with us to all attempt sleeping there for the night, only last minute getting the feeling like we should not bring them and then deciding not to. Once in the apartment, we were there, windows shut the entire time, for 3+ hours. I went from the regular struggle to breath, head pain, and sickly feel to escalating much more and becoming very out of it, struggling to stay awake to beginning to feel so out of control, and I never would have guess we were being poisoned due to the state it had already put me in. Kat only noticed by chance, the smell of gas by the oven, when she was just starting to feel more off, which we otherwise wouldn't have spotted with how strong the place smelled. We were so close to not noticing it at all.

Kat had been barely able to drive but got us to the nearby ER, and doctors confirmed the gas poisoning, and kept us there for 3 or 4 hours through the night until recovered enough, fortunately due to it being short term, we had no lasting damage on our bodies, just both felt very ill the next day, and myself barely able to move I remained sick from it for 3 days.

That morning, Kat had contacted the gas company as the doctors suggested, though they could not do anything as we followed the leases direction and were not notified during the event, so no one but the apartment maintenance would be able to even confirm it happening. However, the fire departmen came with a firetruck, since it was also recommended by the doctor to get the place checked out by them.

The landlord later called, after us updating her of current apartment issues promptly as per lease requirements, and this call she went too far. She kept up with her same tactics but worse. She tried implying either we made up that there was a leak or we intentionally gave ourselves gas poisoning (like we were still very sick from the previous night) and was then many times claiming everything is fine with the maintenance man the landlord insists "he knows what he's doing" and "no one has ever had a problem with him", because we had included our concerns with him-- this guy had tried making kat sound like she overreacted and didn't know anything, kept claiming that "Gas does Not spread" so we should have been fine, not having any effects of poisoning, along with other contrary claims.

Anyways, the landlord lady was very clearly implying she thinks we are liars about there even being a gas leak, implying we didnt contact the gas and fire department which she claimed to "work closely with so they wouldn't lie, because she contacted the places and no one had documentation since maintenance was the only one to witness, it was her word against ours. This is when we realize due to the lease instructions to forgo contact to a third party professional to fix gas leaks, we would not be able to have paper documentation against her to prove it. She even "randomly" asked the name of our previous apartment place, and mentioned threatening like "didnt you have a gas leak there too?" As even more reason to accuse us, and saying she may have to contact our previous apartment place and saying how odd she thinks it was to have another leak, though this one worse,

On the 3rd day, after the 1st leak I was still feeling ill only starting to recover, the 2nd leak happened. this time we had to bring our cats with us, since we had no where else to stay with our previous lease over, and the apartment still uninhabitable and made us both more sickly, and still feared being there.

Earlier in that day, we were reassured multiple times that it was fixed and that "the stove SHOULD be putting out a gas smell for the next hour or 2", and that it means it's "Fixed, working" the maintenance man kept insisting, even the landlord lady was there strongly confirming multiple times it was true because "he Knows what he is doing" again, even confirming therepair was checked later in the day to make sure there was no leak and that it was safe.

We were afraid to go back after the 1st leak after how badly to us at least it seemed to be pouring out earlier in the day and their claim that it was supposed to be that way, but it was the only option we had.

We were unsure if we were just overreacting for a while and imagining the smell, it was several hours laters with all windows having been left open, though eventually calling our gas company this time to get proper documentation and a professional, since the smell had not diminished.

Kat was told by the gas man that gas was shooting out, and he's seen fires breakout from similar.. so we had to get Out.

Which led to us being homeless and having to sleep in the car and soon after, we were fortunately able to stay at Kat's parents house though they do not have space for us, keeping us and our cats in her nephew's small cramped room, with Kat sleeping on a broken bed that is messing with her scoliosis, and me havung to sleep on the floor for over a month now really taking a toll on me. And our cats have been under constant stress, making them require more care and expense.

This whole thing has made me lose my job, has been traumatic for us both, and lose easily over $2,500 into cost of the apartment and our repairs alone, and $250 on an attourney that did not try to help much but was able to get us out of the lease. On top of kat recently being wrongfully stopped by a cop for a made up reason, giving her a $135 ticket, along with having to take a 5 week un paid leave of absence to be able to help deal with our situation. And we can no longer put off car repairs, we have put off this whole year since it sputters most of the time instead of starting now along with other concerning issues.

We have currently been trying to find better jobs and a place to live, though due to the unstable living situation and and loss of income it has been more difficult to find a place.

So, any mutua*aid if you have the means and any reblogs would really help and be appreciated a ton

[elainsgirl]

I saw this one post ranting about how people love Emerie but bash gwyn because of Azriel. Most elain fans don’t hate gwyn because there’s not much to hate about gwyn. She’s not a main character - as such we didn’t get to see any of her flaws. I know many people bash Feyre for being too stubborn/immature, elain for being too passive/meek, Nesta for being too aggressive/mean but it’s their flaws that make them such interesting characters. Of course SJM can always expand on gwyns character and further her development in future books, but as of right now she’s kinda one-dimensional and was only written to serve in Nesta’s character growth which makes it so easy to use her character as a self-insert.

I think most people are put off by gwyn because of a select few who prop her up by tearing other female characters (particularly elain and Feyre) down. Gwyn can be nice without elain and Feyre being mean. Gwyn can be motherly and nurturing without elain being cold and Feyre being a bad mother. Gwyn can stand up for Nesta and be a good friend without Elain and Feyre being bad sisters. I rarely ever see headcanons/fics about Emerie being Nyx’s second mom and teaching Feyre how to parent, or Emerie yelling at elain for being a bad sister and scolding her for leading poor, little baby Lucien on - and yet I’ve seen countless about gwyn.

And honestly I don’t believe that the fandom likes Emerie more than gwyn at all. In fact, I would say that gwyn is probably more loved throughout the fandom than Emerie is - which is messed up in its own right. In my opinion Emerie, a POC and LGBT character, rarely gets the same amount of recognition as gwyn, who’s a white cis character.

The only reason most elriel might *hate* Gwyn and I say that in an exaggerated way bcs annoyance is more the word, is due to how her stans have shoved Gwyn down our throats ever since acosf. How in every situation, they would use Gwyn to tare down Elain and show how much better and amazing Gwyn was. How Gwyn deserved Az and Elain didnt, etc etc. Other then that, she is just irrelevant. She’s Nesta’s friend, a nice character that was part of acosf and thats pretty much it. There is nothing to hate Gwyn herself for. She’s not done anything wrong, she isn’t a polarising character nor is she complex. She’s just there. The perfect bff. Perfect way to put it anon, Gwyn is one-dimensional. Whereas characters like the sisters or even batboys have flaws that make them complex -> they’re more interesting to read about and im sure as an author, to write about. Yh sure, Mass can “expand” on Gwyns character but thats a “maybe” as of now Gwyn is just a standard character thats perfect for self-inserting with - which many of her stans do.

Gwynriels are the ones that made Gwyns character all about Azriel. Poor girl showed 0 romantic interest in him. It was her “stans” who forcefully interwined Gwyn and Az together. Instead of appreciating and focusing on her joruney during acosf - they’ve made discussions surrounding Gwyns character be related to Azriel and how can she be the perfect/right Li for him. How can her trauma serve the next book. It wasnt elriels who did this. Im sure there are some elriels who are toxic and disgusting with their hate for gwyn but thats not the norm. In a general sense, no one hates Gwyn bcs of Azriel. He was ready to risk his life for Elain and when it came to Gwyn he wS more concerned with another redhead…there’s no reason for any elriel to feel threatened by Gwyn. I think - in my personal experience- we’re just heavily annoyed with her stans who have put so much false importance onto this new side character over characters that have been apart of the OG series.

YES, Gwyn can be all those things: Loving, funny, protective etc WITHOUT the need to villanise Elain and Feyre. The amount of times I see Gwyn stans say how Gwyn will put Elain/Feyre in their place for how they treated Nesta or how Gwyn will be Nyx’s favourite over his literal auntie is crazy. Its bcs they dont care about Emerie enough to make her a main character. Gwyn however they need to be a main character- part of the main cast. Thats why they insert her into the IC dynamic and have her interacting with all these important people so she can then be important and integral to the story. So the narrative can focus on Gwyn as it does with the inner circle. Obviously, Azriels Li will be part of his family so they need to include Gwyn with the IC.

whoever is claiming Emerie is liked more then Gwyn is wilding. They’re straight up lying, anyone part of the fandom knows how much Gwyn has been hyped up and how loved she is. Emerie does not get the same recognition that Gwyn gets and yh she should, emerie was a pretty amazing character in Acosf. Yet ofc the white woman would get more popular, they’re also giving the illyrian plot to Gwyn and her story instead of Emerie’s who it belongs too.

[cogmented]

hi cogmented! love the art. do you have any tips for beginners? thanks and have a good day

HI YES YOU TOO i think most of these are applicable to beginners and non-beginners

i learned these tips from two low level art classes based on charcoal so i find some of these a lot easier through traditional means, but the skills learned from them should be transferable through any medium

i wont be touching on color or perspective too much, here's a past post i did on colors.. more so values, but it didnt go in-depth as i would have liked

shape and form are fundamentals for visual art. you need to think of form to get your shapes around it

mass and additive are kind of the same thing, just the filling of the shape, no lines involved. gesture is more so for the feeling of the same, and line gets further definition

here are some of my digital examples:

mass, gesture, line

subtractive

the top left drawing started as mass, where i formed the two people's positions into one blob and then colored over it

once you start getting those down, you can start applying it. but, you may want to look at what other artists are doing too

tracing, doing master copies, and using references are all fair methods of learning off of another, just dont pass off traced or copied art as your own

tracing tends to make your lines appear stiff, especially if you are tracing a more gestural drawing. you don't get the same motion as when you are simply referencing

mastercopies are replicas of the art work, made to look exactly like it in an attempt to emulate the same techniques the original artist might have used. i find this personally the most tedious, but beneficial method, but it may not be the easiest thing to do as a beginner who is not used to quick hand motions or confident lines.

this mastercopy sucks because mimicking traditional on digital is not the easiest thing in the world, and i on god just fucked it up, but you can see how that form and shading is much more similar than the other two

using an image as a reference is the most widely known method, but it may not look exactly how you want it to at the start! you might simply not know how line weight, textures, or line methods work yet, which is something figured out through practice and observation

and speaking of observation,

this looks okay, doesnt it?

but there is something much more structured to this, right?

it is hard to not assume you know how things look. you see things every day! your reference is right there! but really think about what you're drawing, and what it looks like.

references are always helpful, be sure to glance back frequently and really look at the distance between things, how things are rotated, how things curve around each other, and where shadows add definition

and even the bottom drawing does not capture everything correctly (the top left is not pointed enough, the middle is too high, the bottom right back fabric is too low, the bottom left is missing a fold, etc etc) i gave myself 5 minutes max for these, but it certainly looks more correct and it is not just more well developed shading

(the box is something i do often to get the size of shapes down, or to see how much space something will take on the canvas)

and always always always experiment

you do not have to draw every line, you do not have to put every detail in its right place, you are only trying to get visual information across in a manner that you enjoy

if you have an idea, but dont think you can do it, the most important thing is that you try it anyway. if it looks like shit and you dont like it, try again another day, just dont stop drawing because one day you will be able to do it

dont be afraid to erase things, to start over if you dont like it, even if you spent time on it, because you can always redo it better the next time and each time it is another thing learned or whatever. or keep it cause it looks funny or interesting who cares, as long as youre doing something

[enchantedsword]

okay im going to try and do as many headcanons/ideas i have for this au(now named stone twin au because i cant think of anything else and im bad with being original obviously) most of these are about wukong since hes the one i think about constantly but i guess i have to start somewhere(also i have a few of my headcanons in here that dont just pertain to this au plus a few things from jttw but i didnt feel the need to have them on a separate post), this is mostly just about sunny's(wukong) relationships with others, not everyone but the ones i can think of for now. i also finally figured out how to do read more.

obviously wukong(sunny) would be the more monkey like of the two, hes about a few inches shorter then mk, he's very clingy, loved to cling to pigsys back growing up and still occasionally does especially when not feeling well, also clings to tang and mk and occasionally mei, when the twins were first found he couldnt speak human(he understood it just fine the same way any other toddler would) and while mk couldnt speak monkey he could understand it and played translator until they taught him how to speak human, he still slips into monkey speach when hes really sick or upset/distressed, he prefers it when others play with/style his hair for him(the whole monkey socialization), loves climbing and being in high places and has very high energy when his health isnt acting up, this has caused a few heart attacks

loves both his dads but is closer to tang(we know why even if he himself cant remember) loves to spend time with him learning new things, always begs for stories of tripitaka and what he can of macaque. tang is the one that taught the twins the basics of what was needed for school, and actually does a lot of sunnys lessons himself when hes to sick to go to school, i dont really have a set job in mind for tang yet but i was thinking a historian of some sort that can work from home especially since he has a sick child. its also because of tang that sunny as such a love of reading and learning

with pigsy he's still pretty close, mk being the one closest to him, but hes still loves spending time with him. sunnys not very good at cooking, but he loves clinging to pigsys back and watching while he cooks(as said above its something he never grew out of), pigsy has made sure that sunny can make the foods he actually can eat though. sunny also shares pigsys love of singing and they will have mini concerts when no ones watching.

mk and sunny are very close and slightly co dependent, mk has a lot of anxiety about leaving sunny alone for long periods, sunny has a lot of guilt about this and self blame for mk not having many friends outside of mei and himself, and while hes just as codependent as mk he does make an effort to encourage mk to go out without him. it used to be worse when they were younger, but they both started going to therapy around 10 at sandys suggestion, they still struggle with it but they do have lives and hobbies outside of each other. obviously since sunny doesnt have his memories he cant exactly teach mk how to use the staff and powers, his advice is more of the sibling "well remember when you tried *random thing thats similar to current situation* when we were kids just try that" sunny is the one that eventually pushes mk to try and find an actual teacher at least to teach him to fight properly.

both twins are very talented artists(a canon fact that i just cant get rid of), like i said sunny loves singing and acting/performing but he does have stage fright bad enough to prevent him from doing so outside of his small group of friends/family(this stems from the trauma that always seemed to happen in front of large crowds in jttw poor baby getting affected by everything even if he cant remember). sunny is also the one that gets the better grades of the two despite missing way more school. due to not being able to run off his energy a lot he channels it into his studies and art and writing, he wants to eventually become a professional artist.

mei is obviously just as close to sunny as she is to mk, both of them are chaos and adrenaline junkies, shes his partner in crime when it comes to pranks, she makes sure that he's not alone even on days he doesnt feel well enough to get out bed or hes in the hospital. they both love cute things, and if mei gets a dress she doesnt want she gives them to sunny, especially if its pink(he has a lot of them). she keeps sunny up to date on all the shenanigans that happen while hes in the hospital, including the stuff mk wont say in fear of worrying him.

sandy is the one sunny goes to when he's feeling suffocated and overwhelmed by his familys hovering and overprotectiveness, he finds him to be a very comforting presence and hes a good listener for whatevers bothering him. sunny also likes to help train the therapy cats.

sunny does have a mean streak, especially when its something negative being said about his friends/family, uses his pranks to get back at whoever wronged him, since he's to weak for a physical fight(hes tried once it didnt end badly only because the other person was to shocked to really retaliate sunny did end up breaking the kids nose and his own wrist). the pranks themselves are never cruel or outright harmful just enough to make the person think twice about doing it again

PIF actually manages to figure out who sunny is pretty early on having seen the small family out and about one day, she does assume wukong has reincarnated into a new life, and as much as shes upset with him over what happened with DBK thats still her husbands little brother and one of the ones that help her son, so she leaves them be, looking in from time to time

for DBK he's still got some lingering resentment for being trapped for 500 years. his first thought on seeing sunny is that wukong is just faking and toying with him, his wife does inform him that that is not the case. after that he cant figure out if he's happy about this or not. on one hand he gets to see sunny be the happy carefree person that wukong used to be though he's upset that it's at the cost of his health, but on the other hand he's lost his little brother and never got to make up. sunny does feel oddly drawn to DBK though hes not sure why but he deems him as immediately safe(much to the concern of everyone else)

red son was obviously very young the last time he saw wukong, so he has no idea who sunny really is, after the initial being enemies thing and getting a few good pranks in on him, they actually get a long well, both being sassy and sarcastic enough to keep up with each other(everyone else is happy that sunny has a new friend even if that friend is kinda of an asshole). red son grew up to hearing stories about wukong both good and bad so he does have some complicated feelings about him, that does carry over to sunny once hes told hes wukongs reincarnation and further complicated when it finally comes to light that he is actually a sealed wukong, in the end red son decides that sunny is sunny and still his friend even knowing who he actually his.

the whole macaque situation goes mostly as canon except macaque thinks sunny is just playing around and pretending not to know anything. mk meets macaque the day before sunny is released from the hospital, he follows mk to the hospital to pick him up which is the first time he sees sunny. the fight goes mostly the same but not, in the fact wukong isnt there to fight him and protect mk, but sunny is basically used as a hostage and accused of playing pretend, its sunny being in danger that helps mk get the powers macaque took back. sunny doesnt really know how to feel about the situation at all, hes had a crush on macaque since he was a kid and that same person tried to kill both him and his brother and claims hes someone that hes not. continues to antagonize his friends and claim he's wukong, and a large part of him still does have feelings for macaque even after all that. hes got a lot of complicated feelsing about it but he is still incredibly pissed that macaque tried to kill his brother and tried to use him to do so. macaque is in for a world of hurt when it comes to the eventual pranks. macaque for a while refuses to believe that sunny isnt pretending, since the alternative is accepting the wukong reincarnated and isnt coming back. overall its very complicated and the family disapproves.

as for sunnys powers and memories and immortalies, they are all under different types of seals and of those there are many keeping them all wrapped up tight. like he could unlock one or two powers but his immortalies and memories seals would be uneffected and vice versa. he does unlock 2 powers during the whole spider queen thing that being his strength and his cloud, however he can't use them for very long without exhausting himself. DBK was the first to notice that sunny had powers during their imprisonment with spider queen, he was able to trigger sunny into activating them which got them free. though DBK did get punched for his efforts, sunny broke his wrist again and immediately passed out, DBK getting them the rest of the way out and bringing sunny to his family

[beddybites]

Do yiu have any tips on like how to attract more attention 😭 it's been a good while and it's a huge struggle of keeping motivation and not so amazing art so it's hard to sure my characters and their stories bc one thing a can say in confidence is I am a good writer I'd like to think, people tell me I have and oddly good but cryptic way of writing that keeps people enthralled, but my biggest struggle is getting them interested in the first place 😭

hi there!! i admittedly dont really know much about the world of writing and how to gain more attention there, but i can try to give tips and see what applies & sticks!

start off short & simple and build it up over time

if you start off with something big and complicated there will be more pressure to keep things big and complicated. theres nothing wrong with short and simple and mixing it up here & there (ie with art: if you only post full pieces with extravagant rendering people will keep expecting it. mix it up a bit. i try posting a variety of sketches and doodles and more detailed things— sometimes some things do better than others and thats ok!

it is 100% okay to repost/reblog your own work

if you ever see me spamming my blog with the same posts, its so i have it back on peoples feeds and on my main profile and its easier for people to find. its also likely that some ppl missed the post, and reblogging/reposting gives them the opportunity to see it!!

something something “its cringe and egotistical” WRONG!!!!!!!!!! its completely normal for creators to repost their content and it may help a lot!!

short & sweet descriptons

when you post, avoid giant paragraphs of text, especially if you’re including art in the post. people will be distracted and will see a giant post and just scroll past it

speaking of descriptions, try using trendy words and notable names

its kinda like hashtagging. if you look at my posts you’ll typically see how i will drop people’s full names + include the word “art” or “doodle” … this is because it will more likely show up on someones feed if said person looks up the same words.

ie: googling “muichiro tokito art” -> insert my post popping up because it has “muichiro tokito art” written out in the description

i admittedly have trouble providing tips as someone who doesnt rlly understand how i got noticed to begin with haha. something something imposter syndrome or whatever they call it these days… so im not really sure if anything above helps, but this is stuff i typically try to keep in mind when i post with the intent of trying to get people to see it

more importantly—

i know this is cheesy and this is easier said than done (i have this habit too a lot of the time) but numbers does not equal ur worth or talent. i know it isnt motivating and it can be so heartbreaking): but even if ur stuff doesnt get a lot of notoriety please know it doesnt define your value . this may sound like gibberish as it is 5 am as im posting this but truly… never give up on ur work!!! i promise u someone out there loves it

im more well known for my deaging & fluff content and to this day im rlly shocked it blew up the way it did. i really made it for myself. i came up with a whole alias and didnt plan on posting it anywhere bc i was so scared ppl would hate it and harass me or nobody would gaf. but eventually i was just like Man. if this thing helps me then maybe it can help someone out there too. and it helped provide ppl some joy & wonder and whimsy & made them feel seen and truly thats all i could ever want…

its difficult and its hard but i promise u… be patient and kind to yourself. it can definitely be hard sharing things around and getting that exposure you need but there are ways for sure. some journeys are faster than others and thats ok!

again sorry if this is all gibberish its super late ): but i hope this could help in some way shape or form

[atoriv-art]

Heeyyy so sorry if this has been asked before buuuttttt.. What are ur thoughts on the sand siblings?

this made me realize i didnt include their rs in the chart i posted REST ASSURED I LOVE THEM. anyway hehehe :3

a lot of my takes on them are headcanon-based (like even more than the hyugas id say) But i assume thats what people r here for anyway. Sooooo

i really like the suna siblings bc their relationship pre-chunin exams is very, like… dysfunctional, but at the same time stable? temari and kankuro are obviously afraid of their brother, and gaara is deeply unhappy around them, but they've all clearly found a "safe" position to exist in yk?

my read on those positions is that temari actually feels more conflicted about gaara than you would think — she's the oldest and therefore the one most aware of how 'wrong' their family is — but she puts her and kankuro's safety first, therefore she resorts to appeasing gaara and generally staying out of his way. kankuro is more of a show-off and while he is afraid of gaara, it's in a more grounded way, if that makes sense? he taunts him like one might taunt an angry dog, he's afraid of him because of what he can do, vs temari who dreads being around him because she's aware of what gaara carries on his shoulders and Represents

i actually 👉👈 have a suna family-centered fic i've been slowly working on 👉👈 that ive been too shy to mention on main LMAO but since we are on topic here u go [link]. it's yashamaru-focused (my WIFE) but it brushes upon the entire family :3 it'll be slow to update since i've been busy with things but if u don't mind that. i mention it here since i use the extrapolations im mentioning here to write it….

aaaanyway. the kids' relationship with rasa isn't very defined (esp for kankuro and temari) but i interpret their situation as the classic… yk, father lost his soul after the mother died sort of thing. it's a bit cliche but it makes sense LOL while the only kid we know for sure rasa was cruel towards is gaara i don't find it a stretch to expand it towards the other two, even if it wasn't as extreme.

so, with that in mind: my personal interpretation is that temari — in addition to getting the usual heir responsibilities — got put into a caretaker role for kankuro, pushing her towards cynicism and self-preservation above all else (she's also the one most likely to remember their mom, and an early loss like that can push one into hyper-independence), while kankuro was left with a bit less pressure but as a tradeoff grew hungry for acknowledgement, eventually feeding into him becoming a bit of a bully as he gets older. i think he was the one with the most... "normal" relationship with their father, but i wouldn't necessarily say that's a good thing lol

gaara is in a unique position because he was not fully raised by rasa, and his relationship with him is a lot more shallow and extreme as a result. instead gaara ended up being built into who he is almost exclusively through yashamaru's kindness and subsequent betrayal — and this is only accentuated imo by the fact that gaara does not (iirc?) at any point willingly bring up yashamaru. he badmouths his father and blames him for who he is, but the formative moments of gaara's childhood that we see are of him with his uncle. isn't that interesting? to me it reads like that's still a wound so deep he can't even bear to acknowledge it; rasa treats him like a monster so gaara is free to spit poison back at him in return, but gaara did wholeheartedly believe his uncle loved him at a point, and the idea that he did not was so world-shattering that he can't even bring himself to acknowledge his existence

all that being said, gaara as we meet him in the exams treats his siblings like strangers and i can't fully blame him for that; while the compounded traumas of 1. losing their mother and 2. the shift in rasa's disposition, cannot be understated, i think what truly "broke" the siblings' dynamic is the way gaara was likely forced into kankuro and temari's lives after yashamaru died. while they'd certainly met before, there's a world of difference between knowing you have a distant, troubled younger brother vs having that brother violently placed into your home in his most vulnerable state after another familial loss.

(yashamaru's rs with his other niblings is never really touched upon but i do think about it often. he was so close to their mom i doubt they had no relationship at all! but that's. you know. what the fic i mentioned is for.)

it inherently puts the kids into an adversarial position, especially with how rasa doesn't try to argue for gaara's humanity. so gaara, freshly traumatized and distrusting, is met with siblings who are terrified of him and a father who he knows wants him dead. to make things worse, yashamaru (my king.) made sure to crush whatever goodwill gaara still had towards the world before he died, so there's no part of him willing to give anyone the benefit of the doubt. no one has any interest in fixing this situation so this is the dynamic they settle into.

yet! they are still family and there are certainly glimpses of that. one of my favorite moments is temari looking out for gaara for, in our pov, the first time

it's really simple but it always gets an emotion out of me, it's why i think their relationship bothered her the most… one of my biggest gripes with the suna siblings is honestly that we just don't get a lot of them after a point! i would have loved to see them getting closer after gaara takes the first step in closing the distance.

kazekage retrieval arc is easily one of my favorite arcs in naruto it's soooo sweet to see kankuro and temari fighting so so hard for their baby :( i really like the quiet moments where you can tell there's still a lot of guilt over how things were, i wish we got to sit with it a little more because part of the reason i like their bond so much is because of those moments of doubt, you know? i think it's far more powerful for gaara to wonder if he's been fully forgiven, for temari to grapple with the guilt of not having been a good sister to him, than for them to easily slip into a healthy and stable dynamic as a trio.

how do they feel about their father? their mother? how do they feel about their uncle? they are three different people with similar but not identical experiences with all of them, and it makes you wonder how they might navigate unpacking all of that while not jeopardizing their fledgling bond. for example i'm personally a huge fan of gaara coming to view his uncle in an imperfect but ultimately empathetic light, while his siblings see little reason to extend him so much grace.

their personalities in shippuden make a lot of sense to me taking their upbringings into account too; kankuro and temari are predominantly rasa's children, and therefore have rougher edges and are way more averse to earnest displays of affection. gaara meanwhile had yashamaru's influence in his formative years; he knows how to articulate his emotions and acknowledges the importance of sincerity and kindness. i dunno if this was intentional but i think it's a neat detail!

soo much of the suna family follows this pattern of love breeding resentment (rasa's love towards karura breeding resentment against gaara, yashamaru's love towards karura breeding resentment against gaara and rasa, gaara's love towards his uncle being twisted into hatred against the world, the siblings' love for each other being corrupted then saved) it's sooo. chef's kiss. again my only complaint is that we don't see more of them. literally who cares about konoha i want to be in suna forever

[maxdibert]

I hate the excuse "Snape was only bullied bc he was into the dark arts and believed in blood purity" Nah man, most of the "hot" popular guys in my HS were racist as shit and watched liveleak execution videos on their phones in class and they sure as fuck didnt get bullied for being massive pieces of shit (or in any official trouble, "we cant do anything if you have no proof", fucking hell), but do you know who did get bullied and in trouble? The quiet "ugly" kids who were into innocuous stuff like anime or emo fashion and just wanted to be left alone. Getting bullied every day for no reason other than existing, and then getting punished when you finally break and lash out at the bullies once, while they get away with years of constant attacks on you and your friends.

I love Snape, because I see myself in him. Liking him tricked me into realising I didn't deserve what happened to me. I love all the people who stick up for his character, you're kind and understanding.

Love your blog, I've been going through reading all your posts and I couldn't help messaging, you write so well and it made me emotional. I hope you are well and have a wonderful day ❤️

That's a shitty excuse.

First, because canon doesn’t support it. Canon makes it very clear that James was the one who started the whole conflict. James, without anyone saying anything to him, approached Severus and mocked him for the first time on the Hogwarts Express during their first year. At that point, Severus hadn’t said anything about liking the Dark Arts, and James wasn’t born a Legilimens to magically know it. He simply thought he could butt into a conversation and make a shitty comment, and that was it. Canon also clearly establishes that when James stripped Severus in front of the whole school, it was because Sirius was bored, and his way of having fun was to corner “Snivellus” and publicly humiliate him. At no point are the Dark Arts mentioned. At no point is his association with Slytherins mentioned. The only one who brings it up is Lily, not James. This makes it very clear that James’s motive wasn’t ideological—he just enjoyed tormenting Severus because he liked having someone to take it out on. That’s it.

And second, that’s still not an excuse to torment someone in a position of inferiority. I’ve met plenty of people with garbage mindsets throughout my life, and I’ve never beaten them up for it—unless we were at a protest and they started getting violent. I have friends who were very popular in school, with leftist and combative mentalities, and it never crossed their minds to go after a marginalized kid, no matter how shitty their beliefs were, and publicly humiliate them. It’s ridiculous. Social justice isn’t about being a rich, spoiled brat abusing your social and economic power to pretend you care about people’s rights by using violence against someone who clearly can’t defend themselves or doesn’t have the same opportunities and tools you do. Social justice is about real actions with real impacts on society. So even if James’s excuse had been that—which it wasn’t—it would still have been just as wrong. And if anyone thinks otherwise, they’re either sociopaths or literal children who still don’t have hair on their legs and have no clue how the world works.

I wasn’t bullied in school, but I have met plenty of James Potter types throughout my life, and they’ve always disgusted me. White men, with money and resources, who think they can do and say whatever they want and treat people however they please. The ones who make “jokes” that aren’t jokes, the ones whose jokes have repulsive undertones. Guys I absolutely would punch in the face. Guys I’ve had to deal with all my life because, at the end of the day, they’re just gutless bags of shit.

Thanks for reading my blog. I’m glad it made you feel good. Big hug <3

[boxheadpaint]

oh god when did i diary post last. Well as good a time as any

another year older today, though birthday festivities are actually taking place yesterday and tomorrow due to conflicting schedules and hannukah party stuff. spending this last week of DEMBER watching found footage / mockumentary horror and doing my best not to worry as much as usual to varying levels of success. still need to get refill on blood pressure meds because sleep is annoying again thanks.

joycon controller journey where in the end i grab those ergonomic ones which they only had the pokemon print ones in stock but theyre very nice. they make my switch wide and intimidating and it doesnt hurt to use which im not sure why i ever got used to that for normal joycons? I can take a few guesses though namely being yay videogames and being good at ignoring pain until its gone for a bit.

waiting back for exciting surgery news though knowing state health that wont be for a while! in the mean time just gonna look at fish and have a beautiful time. didnt actually super celebrate christmas this year, stayed home with partner. did have a gift from my mom (MICHEAL FATCAT VOLUME 2 LETS FUCKING GO. And a book on color combinations) for it and another for my birthday (immensely sexy natural illustration book) which was very nice and makes me happy. since she moved to mexico our schedules dont line up as well from timezones but the few calls we have had are nice. she got a puppy that made me cry over video from the smallness.

at this point i miss digital art enough that i am willin to brave the overheating and bluescreening of my surface again but maybe instead i could set up some stand made of welded paperclips or something so it can sit up and breathe again. Mom gave me her old one but its windows 11, then theres the yogas that doug has where one doesnt work with my pen and says ACTIVATE WINDOWS in the corner because it was probably some sensitive work thing while the other yoga has like. a mystery charger we have yet to find. we will likely try to downgrade moms from the windows 11 shit as best we can but god im not confident in it.

Every month i think i need to stop worrying about what people will think of my art, that their interpretations dont matter and i am doing what makes me happy and what keeps me interested. i also manage to forget this every month around the same time. i miss drawing very very quickly to make stupid funny pictures for people, its a lot better at conveying how i feel and think than trying to pull from my limited vocabulary. written words are basically just another kind of picture that are funny and dont make any sense in any order you say them and will never get across what you are trying to say.

okami HD was 5 dollars on the switch. its been a lot of fun to play through it again after all this time- when i was a kid i thought after orochi i beat the game and that whatever else was going on was a weirdly long postgame. i stopped at the VERY near end of act 2 because of the fucking blockhead warrior guy was impossible for me. i was trying to get footage of the weakpoints on a flipphone with my family behind me like mission control. now that im an adult man with reading comprehension and a smaller screen with a built in screencapture function im sure i will get just as mad as i did back then.

12/28/2024, I keep accidentally not hydrating enough day-to-day and i still need a shower. gonna go fuckin water mode

[dainangel]

bad decisions

pairing: s.jaeyun x f!reader

also: l.heeseung

warning: mentions of drinking, cheating, suggestive

—> even after a messy breakup, you still found yourself still attracted to jake, and he felt the same. its not a healthy relationship, but how could you both avoid it when it its just too good? 

🎧: greedy, everytime, break up with your girlfriend, motive (ariana grande

author note: holy moly its been a hot minute since ive posted on here!!! anyways, i was listening to ariana so much recently so that is the cause of this writing ✍️

party. get drunk. make up. get down. kiss. say goodbye. repeat. 

that was the continuous pattern you had with none other than jake sim. fate had somehow twisted its ways to urging you to always run into the boy again, again, and again. it was unavoidable, no matter how much you tried. 

3 years ago back in your senior year of high school, jake confessed his huge crush on you right at your front door at night. of course, you felt the same which led to eating each other’s faces off under the dim porch light for your neighbors to see (cough). he loved you, and you loved him. there were bumps and dents through the span of your 2 year relationship, but you couldnt have asked for a better boyfriend. until he took you out to the worst party of your life.

in the moment, the party was amazing and the energy was through the roof. jake’s frat friend was hosting it as his place since his parents were out on vacation, and boy was it a huge home. we’re talking mulitple refrigerators, a movie theatre, gaming room, high balconies, and a jacuzzi on the second floor. after having too much to drink, and talking it up with strangers who were now acquaintances, you realized jake was missing by your side. normally during parties, jake would always follow you around to make sure no one unecessary bothered you, held your cup when you had to use the restroom, and would make the dance floor intimate. concerned, you walked around and through the atmosphere of sweaty bodies and alcohol, looking for any sign of jake. with your red cup slipping out of your hand, you made eye contact with jake in a hallway. making out with a girl. a girl that wasnt you. her back was facing you, but you had to see the abomination of jake going crazy with a random girl near the bathroom. you could feel big globs of salty tears blurring your vision, and your breath hitching immediately. at this point both jake and the girl noticed you, still not letting go of each other’s grasp. when quickly turning around and running off back into the crowd, all you could hear was the yelling of jake, desperate for you to come back. 

that tragic and unforgettable event was 7 months ago. you were eventually immune to jake’s random calls and texts, asking for forgiveness and checking in on you. they didnt feel the same as before, and did not make you feel any better. you ended up blocking him on everything, including deleting his contact information on messages. you were way past this toxic incident, now talking to a guy named heeseung. at your college, you couldnt deny that he was one of the popular guys on the basketball team. although he was basically a himbo and a jock, he was still anything better than jake. 

yet, that didnt stop you from running back to jake himself. he was like a drug you couldnt stop taking, and no matter what you always wanted to come back for more. soon your excuses to go to parties with heeseung werent to get down with him, but  jake. your ex of 2 years now clouded your brain, and even though you never unblocked him on social media- you hoped to see him at multiple parties. and of course, he was always there. 

party after party since the incident, it was the same deal. bring heeseung and let him wander off towards a different group, get drunk with jake, find the nearest bathroom to make out in, get down, and end it all with a sloppy kiss without a verbal goodbye. you never expected to reach this level of insanity, especially with your long-time ex you swore to never go back to. you didnt care how horrible  jake was and how disloyal you were— as long as he was yours for the night. 

you saw him as a toy to be selfish with, using him to your likings. make him feel weak in the knees, and leave him empty handed afterwards. this weird situationship soon blossomed and churned into a possible second chance with the man. 

however, you did not expect to wake up in his bed on a saturday morning so soon. it was just like how it was 3 years ago. turning around to face the other way, jake was wide awake, looking into your eyes with a loving look. you stared back in interest, suddenly feeling a craving to be bad, once more. this obviously wasnt a healthy relationship or whatever this turned into, but you couldnt help it. neither could he. “wanna wanna go for round 2?” jake spoke under his breath. responding with a sly smile, your lips were already locked with his; meanwhile your hand was reaching towards the bedstand to silence the multiple calls from heeseung.

 this was far more important.