#made no sense for ratchet to stay behind (why would he be needed on earth when there's so much to do on cybertron)

[beesantennas]

interesting how they didn't spend much time at ALL focusing on human relationships in the last season (especially with the team changing so much with the additions of smokes and mags and sometimes jackie) so like. how are we really supposed to feel the impact of them Leaving For Cybertron........

[erimeows]

Yellow Roses

The first time was a learning experience.

Bumblebee had been innocent to the ways of human gift-giving back then, unsure of what to get or where to get it, but after using the internet and looking up where to buy gifts for humans, he found that there was a gift shop down the street from where the Autobot base was, and he begged and pleaded with Sari for some of her allowance money “for something important”.

He wasn’t sure what he wanted to get. What he was sure of, though, was that he was completely enamored with you and had been since day one- and he couldn’t bring himself to confess yet, but if he didn’t channel his feelings somehow, they were going to burst.

But as he approached the gift shop on that sunny day in Detroit, no other than Optimus Prime walked out and bumped into him. Thankfully, before he could fall back at the impact, Optimus reached out and caught him, placing him back on his feet with one strong servo. 

“P-Prime, hey!” Bumblebee grinned and tried to look as inconspicuous as possible. He knew he wasn’t guilty of anything nefarious, per say, but he had no idea how Optimus would feel about him being in love with a human and wanting to buy gifts for said human with money that wasn’t his. “What are you doing here?”

“Uh, nothing much...” The other Autobot blatantly lied and hid a bouquet of blue and gold flowers that Bee didn’t know the name of behind his back, face burning the brightest shade of red the smaller bot had ever seen it. “Are you looking for something in particular?”

“I don’t know, I mean, what do humans even like?” Bumblebee muttered without thinking, and upon seeing Optimus’s optics widen, he raised his servos defensively and shook his head. “I mean, uh-! Never mind! What’s up with the flowers?”

“Ah,” Optimus gave an awkward grin and held the flowers in front of him instead of continuing to hide them, probably realizing that it was too late and Bumblebee had already seen them. The younger bot wondered if they were for Optimus or for someone else, but he didn’t dare ask, only listening to his leader talk. “I learned that unlike some other organic planets, on earth, it’s considered rude to pick plants if they’re in close proximity to someone’s home or in front of a public building or park unless they’re a specific type called weeds, which flowers aren’t, but I wanted to buy some for someone, so I came here to pick them up after asking Sari about it. Are you gift buying, too?”

“Well, yeah, I guess you could say that,” Bumblebee looked away and held his forearm in one servo, anxiously shifting his weight between his stabilizing servos. It felt like him and Optimus Prime had reached into the cookie jar and caught each other. 

Bumblebee didn’t dare ask who the flowers were for even though he was dying to know in fear that Optimus would ask who he was at the gift shop for in return. An uncomfortable silence fell onto them momentarily, both of them quiet and staring at each other with the noise of traffic and the bustling Detroit citizens walking on the pavement who kept passing by to keep them company.

“I’ve been doing some reading since Sari’s birthday is in a few months,” Optimus tried to continue the conversation and cleared his throat. “The customs for gift giving can involve about anything when it comes to human girls, but the most common are flowers, books, chocolates, jewelry, clothing, video games, or gifts of practicality, which just seem to be hygiene products and things they can use in their daily lives. Gift cards and vouchers with money on them are also common, but considered less personable, so I wouldn’t go that route if you’re close with the one you’re buying for unless they specifically ask for it.”

“Oh... I gotcha. Good ideas, bossbot!” Bumblebee smiled again, the corners of his lip-plates sore from how forced it was due to his nerves.

What if Optimus had figured it out? That would defeat the whole point of his plan; buy you nice things and leave them at your door in the middle of the night without his name attached. It was simple and easy, but if Optimus knew before he even got to try it?

Well. That made it a lot harder.

Thankfully, though, Optimus gave him a nod and bid him a good afternoon, then walked away.

Bumblebee found himself letting out a sigh of relief.

Thank Primus...

...Hours later, Bumblebee regretted all of his life decisions. He was sitting, holed up in his room with one audial pressed up against your wall. It was a terrible habit of his, but he eavesdropped on you pretty frequently when he heard bits and pieces of you talking through the wall, and he was doing it right now.

He wasn’t sure how he had expected it to go, but when he dropped the bouquet of yellow roses at your bedroom doorstep when you were out for lunch and no one was in the halls, he had hoped that you would simply take the flowers, appreciate them, and never say another word. However, you were currently telling Sari about it, which made sense considering that the young girl dropped by your room often and asked you to do her hair or makeup as an excuse to spend time with you- you were an adult, a lot older than Sari, but the two of you got along very well considering that you were the only one who actually knew how to take care of her properly when Isaac Sumdac wasn’t around.

“I have no idea!” You exclaimed, no doubt in reference to the flowers. Bumblebee cringed. What if Sari made the connection that the money he had borrowed from her was for that? What if she told everyone, or what if you told everyone, and Prime realized why he was at that gift shop and let his secret slip? “I can only assume it was you or one of the guys, but like... I don’t know who.”

“Yeah, I have no idea! It wasn’t me, I would’ve just given ‘em to you. We should dig deeper, (y/n)!”

Oh. Oh, Primus, no. 

“I’m not sure, Sari, whoever it was probably dropped it off like that for a reason,” Bumblebee heard you sigh, and at the same time, he let out a sigh of relief. Maybe you would just forget about it and-

“Wait! Do you have a secret admirer!?”

Dammit. Maybe not.

“I... Highly doubt that, the only one I’d be interested in anyways is-” You started, and then cut yourself off in a way that made Bumblebee’s spark shatter and crumble into little pieces inside his chassis. You were single, but you were already into someone? What if it wasn’t him? He’d understand, of course- Prime was stronger, Prowl was smooth, Bulkhead was talented, and Ratchet was intelligent. Compared to them, he felt like he didn’t have much to offer you. Everyone around him was amazing, and he was just there, but... He loved you, and he wanted you to know how loved you were. So, whether you’d love him back or not, he’d keep giving everything he had to you; even if the way in which he went about it was indirect. “Actually, never mind, but your braids are done-”

“No, wait, you can’t just gloss past that!” Sari whined. Bee almost didn’t want to hear the rest of your discussion, but he couldn’t keep himself from listening. “Who is it, who is it!?

“Let’s just go play Animal Crossing in the living room, we can talk about all of that at a later date, yeah?” You offered, voice laced with both your amusement and confusion. 

“Fine, fine, but you have to tell me soon! Pinky promise.”

“Fine, pinky promise. Now let’s go.”

Bumblebee heard your door open and close, followed by what he presumed to be you and Sari’s footsteps in the hallway. The sound eventually dissipated.

The Autobot was left to lay back on his berth and stare at the ceiling with a huff.

You were telling others about the gift he left, trying to get to the bottom of it, and you were into someone or somebot he didn’t even know about.

What had he gotten himself into?

-

The second time, he felt a little better about it. It was a week later and he hadn’t heard any discussion of the subject amongst the other Autobots, so he assumed nothing had come from it.

But, as he lounged on the living room couch, he jumped upon you sitting down on the couch’s arm- right by where his head was laid.

It made sense that he had been jumpier around you over the past few days. Part of it was the usual I’m-in-love-with-you-and-super-tense-about-it jumpiness that he had become accustomed to, but it was made worse by the fact that he was guilty; guilty of keeping a secret from you, of indirectly lying to you. He could’ve done it the one time with the roses and let it die down after, but when you’d talked about your old game controller breaking the night before at the dinner table, he hadn’t been able to help himself- he went and got it along with a new bouquet of yellow roses, left it in front of your room later that night, knocked, and ran away.

It was the next day, and understandably, he’d been anxious about it. It was better than the first time, but he was just hoping you wouldn’t talk about it.

Of course, he was never that lucky, and you looked at him with the controller literally in your hands. 

“Hey, Bee, do you know anything about this?” You asked.

Had he been caught? Did you know? Or were you just trying to get information from him in case he knew something? Unsure, he decided to play it safe and act oblivious. 

“Huh? What’s that?”

“I’m taking that as a no, but someone left this new controller on my doorstep with a bouquet of roses? I needed a new one, but I only mentioned it to you and the others, so I think it’s one of you guys... But this is the second time I’ve received a gift without any name on it and I’m really confused. I’ve done some asking around, but the only one who seems to know anything is Optimus, and he won’t give me any hints and insists that he has no idea what I’m talking about.”

Great. So, Optimus probably realized why Bumblebee had been at the gift shop last week. Well... From what you said, it sounded like Optimus was at least decent enough to stay out of his business and keep the secret for him- or try to, at least. 

“Yeah? That’s weird, I don’t really know why he’d be like that about it... Wanna play Streetfighter?”

“Sure, but I’m just super confused, man,” You muttered, turning on the playstation and giving a frustrated huff. The game quickly turned on, and while Bee took the old controller, you connected your brand new one and chose your stage, your character being Akuma. Bee chose Ken to fight with and listened to you continue as the game started. “I thought the first time might’ve just been a one-off thing, but it’s happened again, and the flowers were one thing, but now it’s flowers and a new controller. Anyone else would be creeped out, and I’m not creeped out- more flattered than anything since I know it’s from you or one of the other Autobots- but this is really expensive... I’d at least like to be able to say thank you!”

“That makes sense, I think I’d feel the same way,” The black and yellow bot mumbled. The game had hardly started and he was already losing due to his inability to focus- it was so bad that he couldn’t even combat you when you crowded his character into the corner and kicked him over and over and over again. His health bar dropped to zero, signaling that you’d won round one.

Round two started, and he did a little better; actually jumping away from your cornering attempts and offering some blasts and punches, but by the time it ended, he’d only gotten you down to half health, and you were delivering your final blow. Ken fell to the ground, Akuma still standing. 

You didn’t even press replay despite being player one. No, instead, you let out a huff and stared at the ceiling. Bumblebee found himself resting his helm against your thigh without thinking, enjoying the warmth against his faceplates. You two were best friends, very comfortable with each other and with physical affection, so you didn’t mind it, only running a gentle hand over one of his audials in return. 

Both of you set your controllers down. It was obvious that both of you were so focused on the subject of your anonymous gifts that the game didn’t catch either of your interests like it usually would. 

“I might try to ask Optimus about it again tomorrow... Information extraction,” You joked, but Bumblebee quickly sat up and objected. 

“Wait, I don’t think that’s such a good idea!”

“Huh? Why not? He’s the only one who’s given me so much as a reaction,” You argued and stood up to turn the game system off, then started pacing around the room. “And I guess his eyes getting all wide ‘n stuff may have just been something else, but like... It’s all I’ve got to go on.”

“Yeah, but you know how the bossbot is,” Bee stood as well, trying his hardest not to look like he was in the midst of blowing a circuit from the panic that was currently taking over his processor. “He shuts down when you push him too hard. If he knows anything about it, you gotta wait for him to come to you with that sweet info.”

“You’re probably right, Bee, thanks for the advice,” You smiled, and then walked to him to put a hand on his shoulder plate. “I’m gonna go to bed, ‘kay? Goodnight.”

You looked into his optics, and oh Primus, he was gone; your eyes were such a beautiful shade of (e/c), and your smile was so beautiful, and you were so beautiful, and he was so in love-

Quickly, he realized that he was taking too long to respond, so he quickly stammered something out.

“G-Goodnight...” 

And then, you left, swiftly turning and walking out of the living room.

Bumblebee found himself letting out a sigh of relief, but at the same time, he missed you desperately.

He wished he’d given you a hug goodnight.

And, as he stood alone in the dark living room, he thought back to how exactly he’d ended up in his current predicament; painfully in love with a human, giving them things without having the courage to do it face-to-face, life feeling like it was falling apart with every hour that passed without him being able to kiss you and tell you how much he loved you like he so desperately wanted to. 

He’d loved you from the very start, and as bold as he was, he couldn’t bring himself to tell you- he was just too scared, but...

What if this was what finally gave it away...?

-

The third time was what ended up blowing his cover. He should’ve left it alone, and he had told himself that after the last time- it was far too close of a call when you talked about Optimus knowing something, and he was so obvious with his own emotions during that, too... He wouldn’t do it again.

But then, he was shopping with Sari that day and saw a (f/c) hoodie that was just your size and style, and he decided you had to had it. So, when Sari was distracted at a different store, he got the hoodie, along with a new notebook, some pens, and a stuffed bee. He bought the gifts for you and put them in a nice gift bag with some paper, then left them by your door and disappeared before anyone could see him. 

He was sitting in the living room yet again. It was late at night, and though him and his team had spent most of that night playing board games and catching up with a movie playing in the background, they’d all went to bed hours ago, leaving him to think by himself.

He’d lost at every game; Uno, Monopoly, Candyland, Sorry, Cards Against Humanity, and Scrabble, all because he was staring at you the entire time. 

Why couldn’t he just get over himself and confess already? It was selfish to keep hiding from you, because what if the one you’d mentioned being interested in was actually him? And even if it wasn’t him, was it fair for you to think that he saw you as a friend when he was secretly in love with you? Was it fair for you to keep receiving gifts and never knowing who they were from? 

Speak of the devil, though- the second Bumblebee looked up from where he was standing in the middle of the room, you were leaning against the doorway, wearing the hoodie he’d bought you and a pair of pajama shorts. You looked sleepy with your (h/l) (h/c) hair a mess and your soft hands rubbing the bleariness out of your (e/c) eyes. 

“Bee?” You mumbled.

“(y/n), where’d you just come from? You look tired! You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m tired, but I’m fine. I was in the hallway, kinda waiting for everyone else to go to bed so I could talk to you, but... It took me a minute to come in here.” Bumblebee walked towards you and raised his optical ridge. His spark sank to the floor because oh Primus, was this it? Was it finally happening?

“Oh, uh... Why do you need to talk to me alone? What’s up?”

You averted your gaze and gently grabbed one of his servos with your hand, holding it tightly. Bumblebee took a sharp intake. You were about to start talking, and he wasn’t sure he was ready for it. 

“I know it’s you,” You confessed with a guilty smile. Bumblebee froze in place and cringed. “I feel bad, but my curiosity was killing me, so I asked around some more and did a lot of prying- Optimus seemed like he was hiding something when I talked to him about it, so I pried until he gave up and told me that he suspected it was you; that he’d seen you at a gift shop the day I got the first bouquet, that he’d seen you lingering in the hallways the past few times I’ve gotten something, etcetera. He gave me enough details that I pieced it together, so... Yeah.”

“Well, at least it’s out of the way,” Bumblebee laughed out loud, and surprisingly, you smiled back at him. This wasn’t how he wanted it to come out, but he wasn’t sure it would have come out at all if not for this. “Getting human money without a real job is hard! Glad I could at least confess without having to do it so much that I went bankrupt.”

“Bee...” You started again, peering up at him, but he felt like he wasn’t ready for what was going to happen next. Were you about to reject him? He wasn’t sure he wanted to find out. 

“Well, now that that’s done, I’m gonna go ahead and go to bed! I could use a really good recharge right about now-”

“Bee-” You cut him off with a pout and gripped his servo, obviously not done, but he only continued in hopes that you would give it up and let him escape the situation. 

“Goodnight, (y/n)-”

“Bee!” You yelled and pulled him towards you by his wrist so you could get in his face. “For God’s sake, man, stop and listen to me talk for a second!”

“Okay, okay! I’m sorry! I just-” He tossed his hands up defensively, ready to spill his circuits out, only for you to cut him off.

“You don’t think I love you back, right? You’re such a dolt!” You exclaimed. 

“What’s that supposed to mean!?” Bumblebee yelled back at you, processor only catching the insult before he thought back on ‘I love you back’ and froze. “...Oh. Sorry.”

“I mean I’ve loved you for months now! Even before I realized it, I think I would’ve been more than open to dating you at any point in time, I mean... You’re pretty great. Why didn’t you just tell me?”

“Well, uh-” Bumblebee stopped and took in a deep intake, then sighed and linked your fingers with his digits so he could hold your hand properly. The anxiety that had been building up over you for so long now was finally leaving his body and being replaced by relief.“I don’t know. I feel kinda stupid now.”

“C’mere,” You mumbled and wrapped an arm around him. He hugged you back, taking you into his arms and resting his chin on top of your head... He could get used to that. You were warm and soft as you relaxed your body against his and allowed yourself to be held. You let go of his servo in favor of curling your hands and arms up by his chest. “Thank you for the gifts. They were really sweet and I loved them all, so... I’ll be sure to return the favor.”

“Return the favor? This is more than enough to return the favor!” He grinned, only hugging you tighter. “I’ve always wanted to just, like, hug you like this-”

“You can kiss me, too, if you want,” You offered, which had him pulling back to look down at you, spark lit aflame. 

“Really?” Bumblebee asked, just to be sure.

“Of course.”

There was a moment of silence; hesitance from both ends. It was true that, while both of you had been physically affectionate as friends, you’d never kissed, and Bumblebee had certainly never kissed a human. He’d been waiting for this moment for so long, but he had no idea what to do now that it was actually happening. 

Thankfully, you took the initiative and wrapped your arms over his shoulders, hands on the back of his neck. You looked up at him one more time before standing on your tip-toes so you could gently press your lips against his. Bumblebee was frozen still for a moment as he processed your warm, soft lips against his cool metal plating, but after the tension faded, he found himself resting his servos on your hips and melted into it. 

One kiss turned into many; again, again, and again, you moved your lips against his in a manner so intoxicating that he couldn’t get enough of it.

Eventually, though, you pulled away and smiled up at him, but now that he had gotten to kiss you like that, he couldn’t help but want more. 

“I, uh... I’m not sure the favor has been returned yet,” Bumblebee averted his optics from your eyes, able to feel his spark beating faster. “I might need one more kiss just to be sure-”

You chuckled, cutting him off by leaning up again and sloppily pushing your lips against his- and, with that, he was gone.

[my-writings-and-musings]

Hello! I don’t know if you’re still doing this prompt but how about the Oxygen Loss but with either Rung or Ratchet? I’m not sure how you would do Ratchet, maybe he’s away from the Med Bay at the time the LL is being attacked?

I've got some of my favorite bot Rung for you, and Ratchet is in part five listed below! Let's have some angst with the good phsychiatrist!

Part One: Here!

Part Two: Here!

Part Three: Here!

Part Four: Here!

Part Five: Here!

Part Six: Here!

Part Seven: Here!

Part Eight: Here!

Part Nine: Here!

Part Ten: You're Here!

Part Eleven: Here!

Part Twelve: Here!

Rung

·Perhaps being human just made one think differently from Cybertronians in the most unusual of ways, but you truly never understood how anyone could forget the lovable phsychiatrist, though you have quite a few unique reasons to remember him. While he's actually rather sociable and energetic, the two of you most often enjoy relaxing together in his office. Today you're doing just that by chatting away about the various pieces of earth media you think he'll enjoy. Whether or not he actually ends up having interest in any of them, he takes great pleasure in discussing your suggestions. Not only does it give him a better glimpse into earth and the culture of its inhabitants, but it also allows him to hear about your own tastes in entertainment, and that alone could keep his interest for days. Just hearing you talk about yourself so happily is a delight.

·Unfortunately the fun times are interrupted by an emergency broadcast, one the two of you are equally baffled to find is little more than a garble of indecipherable warnings and instructions. Before any kind of explanation can be requested, the line goes off completely, fading out to silence that doesn't even register static. Having served on many ships in the past, Rung has theories straight away as to what could be going on, and they vary from trivial to concerning. For this though, he wants to err on the side of caution. That means getting somewhere safe. If something is indeed wrong, he explains, help can always be found in a number of key locations. Considering where his room is, he knows the closest safe place is the medical bay.

·Wanting to be wary but not panicked, Rung admittedly struggles over whether or not to get moving. Though he doesn't say why, you know one of his biggest fears is being unable to protect you, something he worries he can't do being adverse to combat. A small smile of encouragement naturally lights up your features as you lay a hand on his. You promise him you trust his judgement no matter what. A look of gratitude is knocked off his face when his whole office trembles, and it's replaced entirely with a look of terror as the ship gives a mighty buck, sending your tiny body flying. An athletic dive saves you from crashing into anything, and instead you find yourself held in a pair of trembling hands when the world levels out. On his knees and quite frazzled from the jolt, the first thing Rung does is ask if you're okay, and he lets out a sigh of relief when you confirm you are.

·The incident gives him the impetus to make up his mind; the two of you are going to head for more secure territory. In agreement despite being so frazzled, you let him take the lead and try to convey just how grateful you are to have him at your side for all of this, holding onto his digits as he prepares to get moving. There's so much obvious planning in the processor behind his furrowed brows you can practically hear the metaphorical wheels turning. He wants to be ready for any possibility, so much so that he grabs his rarely used combat staff from the corner. Despite the circumstances, your heart actually flutters a little; to you he's always looked quite dashing wielding the weapon.

·There's silence when he enters the hallway at last, and it drives him to hug you to his chest in a move that comforts himself just as much as he hopes it comforts you. It certainly helps you feel secure, as the move puts you right beside his spark, one that leaves no doubt as to its status as brightest on the ship. A soft and melodic humming seems to pass straight through his chestplate at all times. Pressing against him, you let the sound soothe the tension from your much smaller body. Even if you can hardly protect him from much of anything, you hope he feels a bit safer in your company, though he's hardly struggling to move boldly through the ship. From a distance one might have even missed the light tremble in his frame.

·Scared as he might be, he's faced situations similar to this before, and came out with the knowledge that it's best to move as he is now; quickly, but quietly, so as to avoid being taken by surprise. However, he had the aid of his natural resilience to get him through past situations alive. Incredible healing abilities have always been a literal life saver, but now, the fact that only he would be saved... The thought of recovery is just as agonizing as any wound when he thinks of you not being there when the physical pain faded. Fear of such an outcome makes him freeze when the first sound of movement meets his audials; there's something rather large nearby, and it isn't an Autobot. Nor is it a Decepticon, further inspection tells him when he listens intently, as he can hear how unnaturally it moves even from his makeshift hiding spot. It has to be one of the attacking forces.

·Rung looks down as you hold your breath, having heard the same sound and doing your best to make sure the alien doesn't find either of you. For an instant you're both left frozen and the air is tense enough to feel as if it's smothering you. Scouting the situation as best he can, the small mech takes note of the fact he only has one usable path to the medical bay from this position, as any other course would require a great deal of backtracking there simply isn't time for. The only viable way forward is this one, and as there's only a single enemy... Looking down at you one final time let's him make a decision. This has to be done, for your sake, and he quickly sets you down in an open yet depowered electrical hatch, one likely left this way by a bot abandoning it in the midst of some maintenance. Hopefully it will keep you safe...

·You know what he's doing when Rung whispers for you to stay down and make a run for it should things "end poorly", but you don't even get a chance to try and stop him, the fear in his optics all but breaking your heart as he disappears from view. Alone in the hatch, a million thoughts storm in an attempt to form a plan. Being so tiny leaves you very few options... Yet a forgotten tool, some kind of Cybertronian screwdriver, opens up a slew of dangerous possibilities. What you assume to be adrenaline fills you so fast you get dizzy, but you don't let that stop you as the makeshift weapon is clenched between your shaking hands. Unbeknownst to you, Rung executes his first attack at the same instant, finishing off an impressive ambush with a ferocious stab intended to end a fight before it can begin.

·Rung isn't surprised when his attack merely staggers his opponent; just dissapointed as the brute turns to retaliate. Bloodied weapon in hand, he simply doesn't have the reflexes to avoid the hit that comes next, though he does manage to land a small puncture wound as a powerful blow slams him against a wall. As he is pinned by the overwhelming weight of a much larger being, he can only think about you... The weapon is immobile in his hand, as useless as he knows he is, and he prays this commotion will at least enable you to escape. Pressure hard enough to crack his armor suspends any thoughts beyond pain as the alien goes in for the kill. Only, it's interrupted by a very unexpected attack at the base of one of its legs, one that staggers it as something tiny and very sharp is stabbed as deep as it can go... by you.

·There's no time to celebrate before a reflexive kick sends you sprawling, your tiny body rolling across the ground from a mere glancing blow. Between the window of opportunity and the glaring rage on your behalf, it's all Rung needs to turn the tide of battle. Though he's sloppy from anger and pain, his staff finds a weak point and the bladed end sinks deep, sending the gargantuan being toppling like a gigantic tree. Before the thud has finished echoing Rung is by your side, kneeling on a visibly damaged leg to look you over. Despite the strength of what hit you, there's something off in how bleary you are as his face spins above you, as if the world is slipping away. Your injured partner can see it too. In fact, anyone could see you're struggling just to breathe, and that sends a chill through his spark. Whether or not this level of incoherencey makes any sense for your manner of injury, he doesn't have time to ask questions, needing to get you somewhere safe instead. All he takes the time for is to plead that you remain awake.

·Before he can damage his leg further by attempting to struggle into a standing position, luck arrives in the form of a squadron of armed bots, who heard the sound of combat and came to investigate. The sight of the ship's tiny phsychiatrist and the hulking alien he obviously killed makes most of their jaws drop. In a rare loss of composure, Rung begs them to take you to the medical bay as fast as possible, tears hidden only by his lenses. Slipping out of consciousness while you're lifted by dexterous hands, you can only be glad he'll be okay, and that despite your tiny size you made a difference... A quick thinking bot heeds the instructions and carts you off for treatment. Rung can only pray help will be given in time, and as he's helped along after you the bitter sense of failure hurts worse than any injury; how could he be so worthless as to let you down in this of all moments?

·The feeling is not at all relieved when he arrives for care of his own and is told that you'll live, only because the true cause of your sudden deterioration strikes him hard. You were suffocating, tiny organic body failing from a lack of critical resources, and yet you'd been forced to save him. Did this mean he had hurt you more than anything else today, because he'd been unable to handle himself, making you waste precious oxygen and energy? As soon as he's patched up he requests to stay alone by your side, which is rather difficult due to how many bots want to praise his efforts in taking down an enemy. Their intentions are at least appreciated. Yet he's left to agonize as he waits for you to stir, removing his glasses so he can hold his head in his hands while the emotions overwhelm him.

·Upon waking, it's hard to ignore the fact that most of your body hurts in one way or another, particularly in a few stretches of your arms and legs where bruises will no doubt be blossoming soon. Yet the mask on your face is what really gives you pause, especially as you open your eyes to see the interior of a medical bay suite. A familiar dash of copper catches your attention before you can think too hard. Rung is just beside you, yet you can't tell if he's awake or powered down by the way his helm is leaning so heavily against his palm. The question is answered as soon as you stir, and his usually bright optics snap open to reveal an exhausted grey. Despite the visible anguish, he smiles as soon as he sees you, reaching forward to brush your cheek as he softly says your name. Static blurs his voice into an uncharacteristic croak.

·A tad bit accustomed to worried minds in confusing situations, he gently relays what led to you being here, trying to remain neutral but slipping in a bit of self admonishment as he gets to his failed defensive effort. The memories flood back despite the injuries you suffered and the lack of oxygen in the moment. A far different scene comes back in your mind's eye, one of a mech valiantly charging into a fight just to give you a chance at escape, and you take hold of his digit despite the pain of moving your arm. When he tries to stop the action you cut him off gently, saying that he's not just the reason you're alive, he was the source of your own burst of courage that resulted in you saving his life. Your love for each other is why you're both here to live another day.

·The devotion in your words takes him by total surprise. For all the adoration he has for you, he's not even accustomed to being remembered by anyone, let alone treasured. Honest as can be, he can only silently wipe away a few happy tears as he requests you forgive him for the self imposed criticism. Smiling back, you promise to do so, and to always help him remember that he's worth all the love you have for him. With tenderness only he could possess, Rung leans down to leave a soft kiss on the side of your head in silent thanks. There simply aren't words for the happiness you give him even in the hardest times...

[paperstarwriters]

The Sun is a Star

I’m planning on making more Oppy content, I promise, but this poped into my head and I think it fit Starscream more so.....

Everyone always likens the moon as a lonesome figure in the sky, but the moon has company. Stars dangle from the heavens and keep the moon company. The moon is far from alone.

The sun, however, has no such company. Clouds evaporate at the sun’s heat, or hide the people away from their rays. Without the clouds humans scurry away and hide from the heat, opting to stay indoors where it is cooler or in the shade where the rays cannot reach.

The sun, while a star, has no company in the clear blue sky. No one spares it a glance lest they hurt themselves. It is only when it arrives, when it leaves, and when it is covered by the moon that we stare in awe. Only then— if only for a moment, the sun is loved and praised. All the moon has to do to be loved and admired is hang beautifully in the sky. As if the sun does not do the same.

He was like the sun.

The bright star of your life, shunned as everyone gravitated towards the moon. He was very much hot, with at hotter temper that sometimes burned.

“Tsk! Why would I want the company of a little human?”

Nonetheless you basked in the warmth he provided. Like a plant you soaked up all of the heat that others avoided. When your sun was done burning, you were there for him when he hid behind clouds and let the rain pour over the earth. Most scowled and grumbled at the irritating wetness. You stood amidst it, even when it made you sick.

“… Thank you.”

When you were sick, he would shine as brightly as he could holding back as much rain so that his heat may be able to burn away you ailments. In these moments he was the most gentle you’ve seen him. Not trying to usurp the moon, not trying to prove himself. This was who he truly was under the armor.

Soft, warm,

“Are you alright?”

Kind.

“I’m fine,” you mumbled leaning your already warm forehead against his frame.

It wasn’t exactly true, you felt like the world was spinning, whilst your head was being assaulted with various hammers. You struggled to keep your eyes open, and you couldn’t even stand. Which, of course, was why he cradled you so carefully in a servo, held close to his warm chassis. He had just learned that keeping you warm was a good way to beat your fever, and he already went scouring for heat sources and blankets. He fussed over you the same way Ratchet did for the rest of the team, but you were supposed to be his prisoner. You almost laughed at the thought, but you didn’t need Starscream to believe you were becoming delirious. If that happened he might just kidnap Jack’s mother in order for her to “cure” you.

“You are not fine,” Starscream corrected, “your temperatures are extremely high above normal. If a Decepticon’s inner systems overheated like this we would  treat it as deadly! Of course your current temperature is far smaller than what our frames would be able to withstand and…” he continued to ramble on talking all about what he knew and what he could do, ignoring the glaring error that he didn’t know how to help you, or that he could not help you. That’s what he thought at least.

“Thank you Starscream. I may not be fine but you’re making me feel much better.”

He froze mid pace, and spared you a radiant smile. He squeezed you ever so delicately, a sense of determination reawakened in his red Optics. He may not know how to help you, but he could learn. For you, he was willing to learn. To admit that he didn’t know so he could figure out more. Just so he could help you.

“Is… is there anything else that you need to recover?”

“Maybe a bit of water and food. Soup would be nice.”

“What is soup?”

“I’ll point it out if you find some.”

He was warm, and he would keep you warm for as long as you needed it. When you were cold, or rather, had a cold, he would be there to melt the ice and ailments away. Even if he needed to learn how.

For he was your sun,

and the sun is a star.

[eldritch-araneae]

Windblade, Bumblebee, and Sari from my Sparkpulse AU :3

Below is quick AU explanation ( it’s 13,4k works, I’m sorry I tired to keep it short I SWEAR XD) Also I’m such dumbass, I forgot their Autobot sigils! XDDD

Core ideas of the AU:

It’s basically G1+TFA+Cyberverse mix;

This AU revolves around Bumblebee as the main protagonist;

Autobots crash-landed on Earth in 1985, they landed in Detroit, specifically on Belle Isle; 

Earth became their home and Autobots pretty much-integrated into human society over 33 years. They influenced human society a lot, that helped to avert climate and energy crisis( as not wanting humans going the same road as cybertronians by depriving their planet of resources);

Ark has fusion reactors that are used in Energon production. Autobots encouraged humans to use their own fusion reactors, which allowed human civilization to completely get rid of fossil fuel as the main power source;

Setting: Solarpunk (when the story happens);

Sparks exist and give a lifeforce to all forms of life, not just to cybertronians;

Cybertron is gone, nothing can fix it;

Decepticons only arrive in 2018.

Bumblebee’s Background.

Bumblebee is the youngest among Autobots, who was found on the road unconscious back on Cybertron by Jazz. 

After examining him, Ratchet shares his concerns with Optimus - not only Bumblebee is abnormally small but his plating is soft and flexible, yet fragile, it would be easy to cut and melt through. He also lacks physical strength. 

All of this implies that Cybertron has no more resources to forge any new bots and Bumblebee is the last.

This means there is no way Optimus should send the minibot to fight ( tho Bee has a lot of courage and will pull some crazy stunts here and there), so instead he assigns Bee for scouting and spying missions under Jazz’s supervision ( Special Operations).

Introductions went pretty well, though Optimus admitted that Bumblebee’s face seemed familiar.

Soon, after the first few scouting missions, it’s revealed that Bee has a bit more problems. His spark is strange, it’s producing way too much energy that his small frame can handle, resulting in the erratic sparkpulse that overwhelms his entire system and shut him down for 5 minutes.

Thankfully it was discovered after Bee finished his duty, but still, it raised a lot of concerns. Ratchet tried his best to examine his spark chamber, only to find that the minibot’s spark was sealed shut in some sort of protective shell. This shell cannot be opened. Cutting through it would be bad, so Ratchet opted to work with what he has. 

He first suggests Bee burn down this excessive energy, which works pretty well, as training with Windblade, or doing short races where it’s relatively safe with Hot Rod and such. Still, despite his efforts, the spark eventually will send a huge energy surge that would force-reboot Bumblebee. It didn’t stop Bee from taking on his missions and one of the reboots happened in the middle of the duty. That scared the shit out of everyone as they lost contact with him while he was on Decepticons territory. Thankfully, like clockwork, he was back in 5 minutes. After he completed the mission of securing intel, he had to convince Optimus that he would be okay even if he shut down because Deceptions would never catch him. Bee reveals that he has one interesting ability - he can sense sparks of others( both signature and the pulse). 

For some reason, he thought everyone could do this, that's why he never mentioned it before. 

That allows him to plan ahead, as he pays attention to hiding places and Deception’s nearby and how they move, easily avoiding his enemies. 

Soon he’s pretty much known as the elusive Autobot who will break onto your base, steal all your shit and get away without being caught. Megatron even places a big bounty for catching Bumblebee that is yet to be fulfilled. Then he gets known for being someone who Deceptions, who wants to join Autobots can go to and arrange the meeting with Optimus Prime. Windblade always helps him with this: Bee can sense what is spark feeling, while she can use psychic abilities to catch a sense of their intent. Together they never made a mistake, though there were a couple of close calls.

So this keeps going for a short period of time until Bee catches some terrible wave of spark signatures, emitting from below. Something tells me that they are in grave danger and Autobots must leave Cybertron for good. Such a claim isn’t taken lightly, asking what proof Bee has. 

Sadly, he cannot prove anything aside from “terrible screams of mass death coming from Cybertron's core”. He feels like he knows, but he cannot recall any memories from his data banks. All he knew was that they were screwed and it’s all because of Shockwave ( who Bee hates the most, not even Megatron sparks so much anger within him as seeing Shockwave does.). Windblade also caught this as well with her different sensors so she sided with Bumblebee. Then she decided to look into Bee’s mind and see if she can help Bee to recover those memories. 

It quickly proves that it’s not that simple - all his memories that come before he was found by Jazz are sealed away. And not by some hard-coding shenanigans, but by Vector Sigma - a device that was used to program the AllSpark ( the thing that gives life to cybertronians) so it will create a desired form of life.

 And not just him, but Windblade also discovered this seal, though it only seals specific cluster to memories, which timeframe aligns with Bee’s seal.

So they had a picture: Shockwave did something that messed up Cybertron’s core and, presumably, Bee and Windlade witnessed this( and apparently have met before)? The only way to find out, a break-in to The Spire of Forging ( a place where cybertronians were born), and use Vector Sigma to break the seals. 

That caused a huge fight as the spire was currently controlled by Decepticons, while Megatron suddenly got an idea to use the AllSpark to reprogram Autobots into Decepticons. So it becomes a race. Windbalde, Bumblebee, and Optimus have reached the Chamber of Creation first...only to find out that Vector Sigma is destroyed - the device was cut apart and crucial components were missing. But it wasn’t all - the AllSpark was gone as well!

Understanding that there is nothing they can do, they retreat, followed by angry Megatron’s shooting.

After the battle Optimus informed anyone of their grim situation: AllSpark is missing( they searched for it, this artifact that very strong and unique signature but it’s literally nowhere on Cybertron), Vector Sigma is destroyed and there is still a threat that gets closed to the surface that will destroy them all ( Bee was very insistent of leaving). 

So he makes it a vote between all Autobots: shall they leave or keep fighting. To Bee’s surprise, the majority decided on leaving. Relieved, he begins helping others to prepare Ark ( their spaceship) for a long journey.

When Ark was ready to launch, some complications happened ( as the ship wasn’t in perfect condition for interstellar travels) but they managed to leave Cybertron and begin their journey to their new home.

In general, Bee is in a good relationship with almost every Autobot. Optimus values him as both an amazing scout and a good friend who isn’t afraid to speak his mind and question everything.

Bumblebee befriends Windblade - the cityspeaker from Caminus ( which was of one the first colonies that were destroyed during the war). She absolutely adores Bee’s carefree and optimistic attitude, never being tired of his silly antics ( which he often does on purpose to lighten her mood). 

They become pretty close, and Bee has no problem opening up to her, like sharing his fears ( he is really brave but isn’t fearless).

Some bots like Sunstreaker don't really like Bumblebee much. He thinks that Bee is a defective bot that will doom their entire cause and this animosity intensified when Bee starts bringing in former Decepticons and insisting on leaving their planet behind. (Sunstreaker’s twin, Sideswipe, admits it’s probably because his brother used to be like Bumblebee, kind and hopeful, but the war has changed him and he hates it.) 

Bumblebee tried his best to ignore Sunstreaker, but it is difficult as he compares himself to bigger and stronger bots, feeling like what he’s doing isn’t enough. That being fast, athletic and cunning isn’t enough - he must be more, he must become strong. Which causes him to take some crazy decisions that will put Bee in danger and probably get hurt. 

He desperately craves recognition and respect from others while not realizing that he already has it.

The arrival of Autobots on Earth in 1985.

After one warp jump, they ended up in the Solar System. The Ark wasn’t doing well ( esp engine) and needed repairs if they wanna continue their journey. Teletraan-1 scanned the solar system, informed Autobots about the planet they are currently orbiting (Earth) has a sentient lifeform along with a diverse ecosystem. This surprised everyone because of the odds of them jumping tens thousand light-years away from Cybertron and ending up near other sentient beings.

Optimus didn’t wish to disturb other sentient beings, he decided that they should move to another planet, fix their ship, and move out. 

For that Teletraan-1 suggested staying on the fifth planet’s orbit which is a gas giant (Jupiter). Gas Giants are known for having a lot of hydrogen and helium and additionally, some chemical compounds like ammonia which can be used in producing deuterium and tritium ( isotopes of hydrogen)  which are used as fuel for fusion reactors.

The only issue was how to get there, as their ship is fragile at the moment. Wheeljack suggested using gravity assist still should be okay.

Teletraan-1 calculated the positions of the planets and it’s been decided they were gonna use Earth’s gravity to propel forward, then circle around and do another flyby near Earth - that would give them another speed to reach Jupiter.

Suddenly Teletraan-1 informs the crew about a big asteroid that is headed in their direction and the collision is imminent. It happened fast, before Autobots could maneuver Ark off of the way. After the asteroid successfully vibe checked Autobots, the Ark got seriously damaged and was flung towards the planet. They couldn't break from gravitational pull so Autobots had to prepare for impacts, which would be easier if the ship weren’t breaking apart at that moment, Teletraan-1 did it’s best to stir the ship away from the cities.

Meanwhile, in chaos, Bumblebee fell into a hole in the ship’s walls and he landed in the water of Lake Erie. The impact was terrible as it almost tore his arm from his body. He screamed in pain and was forced into reboot.

Then he woke up next time, he was still in the water, completely disoriented - mostly to the fact he could sense so many sparks around him. He brushed it off as it wasn't important at the moment. 

While still being in pain, he managed to swim up to the surface to look around. Bee saw a big smoke rising in the distance, assuming this is where Ark landed, he tried to make his way there. 

Then Bee sensed something nearby, another spark with clear distress radiating from it. He looked around but saw nothing, then he submerged under the water. He saw a small figure who was struggling to swim. 

Bee dive deeper ( while doing his best to ignore the pain of his damaged arm), gently caught the figure and went back to the surface. The figure took a big inhale and coughed a lot. Bee was concerned, but he could only observe for now. 

He first noticed how this being kinda reminded him of his own kin: they have 4 limbs- 2 legs and 2 arms with 5 fingers, the face structure is similar as well, they also warm and look like they vent as well ( aka breathing. Cybertronian’s breathing is part of the air cooling system.see more in Trivia). While there was a lot of difference as well( being organic lifeform and such), that amazed Bumblebee that he almost forgot about his hand.

After being calmed down, the figure finally looked at their savior only to meet face to face with a giant alien robot. He yelled as a surprise, while Bee yelled back because the former's yell startled him pretty much.

After the shock faded and understanding that Bee wasn't doing anything bad ( they were just chilling in the lake) they sighed in relief and smiled, thanked him for saving them. Bee cannot understand what the figure says, but he assumes right he can sense relief emitting from the figure’s spark and replies, which of course the other didn’t understand as well.

The figure then gestures towards the mainland that isn’t far away, while making a paddling motion which Bee understood as “take me to the land”. He nodded ( to his relief on it means the same thing for humans) and he began swimming towards the land. Which pretty much drained him as they both arrived and his hand got worse. 

Bumblebee curled on the ground, trying to endure, but once again his system shut him down. The last thing he hears as the figure calls to him is a worry.

The next time he awoke, he wasn’t by the lake anymore, but inside of some sort of garage. He was lying on the floor and he tried to get up, but again his arm hurt, though he noticed that this time the pain is tolerable somehow.

He looks to the side and sees that his entire arm was wrapped into some weird stuff, kinda looking like duct tape? Sure it was flimsy, it kept his arm from falling apart.

Two figures entered the room: one he’s already familiar with, which is this person he saved from the lake, and others. They look similar to each other, the other person looking older, for some reason they reminded him of Ratchet. Bee tried to sit up again, but the pain wasn't letting him. Two people instantly got worried, saying something to him which he imagined was something like “please don’t move”. The older one went close to examine the arm closely, Bumblebee knew this look: a look of someone who is checking on the work they did...really reminded of Ratchet again. 

Bee sighs and gives a small smile and thanks to them, though he knows they won’t understand the hopes that the tone of his voice suggested the meaning. The older person nods in acknowledgment, then they exchanged a few words with the younger one and left the room.

The younger one sat by Bee. Autobot looked at them, observing them once more, taking more onto more features and he could tell that they did the same with him. Suddenly their expression lighted up as if they had an idea. Bee tilted his head slightly in question.

Making sure that Bee’s attention is on them, the figure points at themself says “I”. At first, Bee was confused, so they repeated it again. The only thing he could think of is to repeat the same. The exclamation followed by a nod means he did it right. Then they pointed at him and said “you”. Bee did the same...and suddenly it’s clicked. The language, they were teaching him their language!  He smiled and they continued.

Somewhere in the middle of this, they finally introduced each other. The person’s name is Spike Witwicky, a 15yo boy who is living with his father and helping him with the car repairs business. When Bumblebee introduced himself, Spike giggled, saying that Bee’s name sounded exactly how they call a specific insect. The Autobot snorts, funding this coincidence amusing. 

What a strange planet, and he began liking it already. 

Spike asks if Bee came from that huge ship that was falling. He nods, explaining ( in his broken English I imagine) that an asteroid took them down, and then he fell through the hole into the water at high speed that almost tore his arm off. Spike winced sympathetically, assuring that now Bee is gonna be alright. Then he thanks the yellow Autobot for saving him, Bee smiled in response, saying he did what he was right. Though he gets curious how Spike ended up in the water in the first place and Spike blushes in embarrassment because he was looking at the descending Ark and he wasn’t paying attention that he was hanging on slippery ground. He fell and since he wasn’t a good swimmer, the current took him away from the land until Bumblebee found him later.

Soon Spike’s father returns with more supplies and he was pleasantly surprised that their guest can communicate with them. Bee thanks him for patching his arm, tho the old guy says he can do some more, while they try to find out where the Ark landed so they can return Bee back to his people.

A bit later in the evening, Spike decided to show Bee various VHS tapes documentaries about Earth( he almost moved tv and VHS player to the garage), he could have a picture of what their planet was like. The Autobot happily agrees, being both curious and see it as an opportunity to learn more English words.

After a few days, Spike’s dad found out where the Ark landed, on Belle Isle. He offered Bumblebee a lift ( he has a truck which also was used to transport the Autobot from the lake’s shore). Bee gladly agrees, being happy they were helping him even though they didn't have to. To which Spike replied that Bee didn't have to save him either, but he did it anyway.

Spike with dad helped him to get onto the thing where to connect the thing ( lol I forgot), they both sat into the car and began their ride.

The trip went okay, Bee even relaxed and looked around the city, being amazed because everything was new, the sensations were new. Though sure he could see people staring at him, understanding that they know about Autobots...after all, there is no way you could miss something like this as their crash landing. There was probably a lot of news going on about this. 

Thankfully, Spike informed him that the ship didn’t kill anyone during the crash, which was a great relief on his spark. 

Soon they arrived at their destination, Bee peeks over the truck to see the damage around ( a lot of broken trees), and the Ark wasn’t looking so good. He hoped at least everyone was okay!

Suddenly Windblade quickly walked out of Art’s entrance, expecting these humans to be more reporters or whatever and before she could draw any conclusions, Bee called her name and waved with his good arm which instantly grabbed her attention. 

She ran over to her best friends, that he’s alive ( she was looking everywhere and was worried sick) and really wanted to bear hug him, but she saw the arm, so she hugged him gently. Then Bee explained to her that those humans helped him ( gesturing to his broken arm). Windblade thanked the theme, as Bee translated to them. 

After that Windblade announced to everyone over comms that Bee is alive and found, but required medical attention. Meanwhile, Spike looked a bit sad and asked if he’ll see Bumblebee again. The bot smiled and told him that he memorized the path from Spike’s home to Ark, so he will find it again. For that Spike jumped into a hug ( Windblade quietly ‘awww’ed at the scene). 

Windblade helped Bee to stand up and get off the truck, both humans wished Bumblebee speedy recovery before they headed home. She was asking Bee about his new friends ( and also commenting how it was only their couple of days on this planet and he already befriended aliens amazing), Bee ofc told her everything.

On Art, the crew was overjoyed with Scout's return, though Ratchet quickly led him into the med bay as it was clear how much damage he sustained. Meanwhile, Bee sends to Teletraan-1 anything he learned in English, to share with other Autobots, which Optimus was delighted with such a turn of events as it meant he can finally properly contact humans.

After Autobots got a bit established ( like making connections with humans and stuff), Bee finally paid a visit to Spike, the boy was so happy to see him again. 

After that Bumblebee and Spike spend a lot of time together and become friends. Spike also befriended Windblade, while we weren’t as close with her as with Bee, they enjoyed each other's company. Spike’s dad also made friends among Autobots. Together they learned more about the world they were stranded in, with all its beauties and problems, discovering new things like sparks actually being in every living being, Bee has to train himself to probably filter signals, he mostly focused on sensing his fellow Autobots and humans.

Bee quickly grew attached to Earth, not really missing Cybertron anymore. Sure there are a lot of processes and it’s different for everyone but Autobots felt that they can actually live again ( or begin living for younger bots who were forged during the war), the future seemed bright.

When Spike got older ( around 18 yo) he informed Bumblebee that he will leave Detroit for a university opportunity. The news saddened the scout, not wanting to part with his human friend, but he understands that he shouldn’t be in the way of Spike’s hopes and dreams. Out of curiosity, he asks Spike what he’s gonna study ( he had multiple guesses because Spike liked a lot of things).To that Spike replied with the biggest smiles that he will become an astrophysicist! Spike never could choose one thing, but that fateful day when Autobots arrived has sealed the deal. He hoped that he would work at NASA one day. They both laugh.

The day when Spike was leaving, along with his father, they said goodbye. Spike promised to stay in contact with Bee, and the bot promised the same. Kilometers apart won’t matter, they will always remain best friends forever.

Bumblebee missed Spike greatly after this and he needed time to accept this, but thankfully they both were true to their promise and stayed in contact for all years to come.

Fast forward to 2018.

This is when the story would begin, as all previous events described in this document to this point would be revealed through flashbacks and such.

Autobots have been living in peace for 33 years now. They helped humans to progress, technologically, and socially ( Solarpunk setting). They are integrated into society and have jobs( Bee for example is a courier, though sometimes he acts as a diplomat at important meetings that he attends with Prime as humans tend to like him), some bots scattered across the globe to do their thing (though they ofc course pay visits to Ark).

The Ark is part of a big overgrown forest on Belle Isle. It is because Wheeljack and Perceptor wanted to fix the damage they did to the environment during their crush. And after some experimentation, trial, and error they made some sort of serum that stimulates trees to grow fast. Too fast even as plants got out of hand at one point, so they had to fix this as well.

Bumblebee took a liking of plants, so he started his own collection. This private chamber was damaged and has a missing wall after the crash, later it was fixed, it expanded a bit and has a lot of light coming in through windows so it’s perfect for plants keeping. 

6 years ago he and Windblade befriended human Sari Sumdac, who is now 30 years old head engineer, working at Sumdac Systems along with her father. She's an absolute gremlin and always up to shenanigans, which awakes the gremlin side of Bee. Windblade tags along as well, maybe to keep an eye on them. All three are close friends :3

Sari builds an exosuit that improves her strength and grats a lot of cool abilities ( aka Iron Man but cooler) in case Decepticons show up.

He’s also in contact (which thanks to the internet became much easier) and friends with Spike, who is 48 years old astrophysicist at NASA, married to Carly, and has adopted son Daniel. Spike with his family visits Detroit each year to hang out with Autobots.

There is a lot of shenanigans happening on Ark, especially in group chat ( aka Discord server? with Sari and Spike invited.) The higher command are mods, but sure, Jazz loves changing channels names into something stupid :D

There are always twins ( Sideswipe and Suntreaker) with pranks, Jazz blasting music, Wheeljack blowing himself up again while Ratchet complains, fixing him again and again. They would do a lot of activities when free, (imagine them playing Among Us, Bumblebee being such a good imposter >:3) adopting human customs, they even get invited sometimes to entertainment shows ( you know, like those with two teams they have to do various impressions, etc).

The Bee loves music and got into drumming ( he had a habit of focusing on someones’ sparkpulse, using it as a base beat and used his hands to drum on various surfaces as entertainment back on Cybertron), he always does collabs with Windblade ( electro guitar), Sari ( keyboard + other electronic stuff, like a theremin) and sometimes Spike ( saxophone) to do video game music covers, they have a channel ( editing video and maintaining are on Jazz).

Fun fact: Bee’s drumkit and Blade’s guitar are one of few things of cultural value that actually survived the war, though they required repairment and some adjustments ( because the kit was too big for Bumblebee), they are in good condition now. There is writing on Cybertronian, showing the name of the company that used to produce instruments all those million years ago. 

Autobots are living their best life, even though they are prepared in case Decepticons will show up at their doorway.

The arrival of Decepticons.

Decepticons left Cybertron soon after Autobot’s, as Megatron believed that Optimus stole the AllSpark and was determined to take it back and use it to fix their broken homeworlds. Unlike Ark, their spaceship, Nemesis, was in [perfect condition. so they traveled from star to star in order to find a signal from AllSpark.

The problem was that no matter how Shockwave updated the scanning system, they just couldn't find any traces. It was frustrating to Megatron, he could feel how much energy this object radiated every time he walked into the Chamber of Creation, but there was literally nothing. It couldn't just vanish into thin air, can it?

So they just kept guessing, checking every nearby star system. It took a lot of time and was fruitless and the Decepticons grew tired. Starscream especially, always dreamed about taking Megatron’s place and rule Decepticons. So one day, after another failure to locate the AllSpark, Megatron and Starscream broke into a fight, resulting in the warlord throwing his second in command at the control panel by accident. 

Starscream face planted random coordinations and the Nemesis warp jumped to the Solar System, placing them on Earth’s orbit. Sunday scanners activated as they found Autobots’ signatures on this planet. Megatron laughs, he finally found Optimus so the AllSpark must be with them.

Soon they landed somewhere outside of Detroit, which didn't go unnoticed. Teletraan-1 alerts Autobots immediately. Bumblebee volunteers to investigate, followed by Windblade as a backup. Optimus approves the mission and the trio goes to Nemesis location.

Bee gets close to Nemesis, while Blade stays in the air just in case her friend needs a quick escape. He knows the plans of the ship well ( he infiltrated it a number of times), so he easily slips through the guards inside, into the vents. Soon he locates Megatron and carefully listens. He finds out about Megatron's intention to seize the AllSpark from Autobots. Looks like it's the only reason why they even came here and he will turn the city apart to get it.

Thankfully Wheeljack made a force field that won't let Decepticons in as a precaution for years ago. Still, that is a grim sign and they have to deal with Deceptions regardless. 

Bumblebee hacks into their system and quickly downloads important intel.

Then he sees Shockwave, it takes a lot of self-control to not hiss, Megatron just gives him simple orders to oversee something. He takes orders and leaves, but Bumblebee notices that he went in a completely different direction ( as Bee knows the ship well) and didn't like it. Bee wants to follow and see what this mad scientist is planning, but he senses Ravage nearby. The cat is also moving quickly through vents, probably because Soundwave ejected him here in case Bumblebee will show up.

The scout quickly gets out beforeRavage discovers him and leaves. On the way back he shares his findings with Windblade, and later back on Ark with the high command of Autobots. They don't have the AllSpark (and even if they had they wouldn't give it to Megatron anyway), and they must drive Decepticons off the planet, or convince Megatron to stop.

So after this, I imagine a few instances when Decepticons tried to attack the city ( but couldn't get it), Autobots would usually lure them away from the city and fight them there. Here examples of shenanigans that happened:

Sudden dance off, the seeker trio( Starscream, Thundercracker, and Skywarp) was really confused about this shit;

Sari ( in her suit) is legit disassembling Decepticons in the mid-fight. Imagine, Starscream wants to shoot, but his null rays fall off, awkward;

She also stole t-cog ( the detail responsible for transformation) from Blitzwing, much later it was returned;

Devastator caught Bumblebee and was going to quash the scout. Bee on the other hand focused on Devastator’s sparks ( he’s a combiner, made out of 6 Decepticons known as Constructicons) by accident and could hear that chaos that is happening in Devastator’s mine ( since all 6 don't merge into one, they still present chatter, telling Devastator what to do which is pure chaos). That overwhelms him and he yells “QUIET”, silencing 6 six constructions which seriously freaks Devastator out and he falls apart. Much later he did the same trick again when tried to throw Devastator at Autobots again;

Optimus is trying to convince Megatron that they don't have the AllSpark which isn't working. Not letting his frustration get ahead of him, Prime starts throwing memes( which he carefully chose for a specific situation) at Megatron. Megatron is not amused ahah).

Megatron wants to move forward and maybe to take on other cities to force Prime to surrender, but Autobots are one step ahead( as they planned), surrounding Nemesis from various positions ( as Optimus called all other Autobots that live in different locations) to harass Deceptions from time to time, trapping their enemies effectively. 

Conspiring with cassettes.

Later Autobots find out that despite the force field being up, and effectively repelling Deceptions, Soundwave’s cassettes are actually able to squeeze through. Wheeljack is hypothesizing it’s probably because of their size ( they are smaller than Bumblebee as intended) and looking for a solution to solve this.

Interestingly enough, cassettes ( 5 of them: Ravage, Laserbeak, Buzzsaw, and twins: Frenzy and Rumble) are not causing chaos while being out in the city. Bumblebee is keeping an eye on them, he can easily track them down, though they move fast which turns into some sort of game. At some point, he actually exchanges words with Ravage. Bee is trying to understand cassette's motives, but Ravage keeps it to himself ( though Bee senses some sort of enjoyment instead of malice).

Later Bumblebee gets a message from Rumble: they have a bomb and will blow up something ( I haven't decided sorry) if Bumblebee won't come to them alone. Knowing this is turned into a fight, he goes anyway without telling anybody as he wants to get to the bottom of this.

This indeed turns into a fight, as cassettes demand Bee to tell them where the AllSpark is. Bee tells them he has no idea like anyone else. Ravage asks why Bumblebee doesn't want to restore Cybertron, to which Bee replies that there is literally nothing left to restore. The AllSpark isn't some sort of magical object that can fix all their problems. Besides, Decepticons had it in control, why didn't they use it then? The situation gets really awkward after this, Frenzy admits that Megatron saw devastation only after Autobots left as his focus shifted to other things after his enemies were gone.

The fight stops, Bumblebee seizes the moment and asks where is the bomb they threatened him with earlier. Laserbeak just casually shows it, and in fact, it wasn't even activated. Rumble tells him when Megatron found out that cassettes and slip through the barrier, he ordered Soundwave to use the bomb to cause chaos. This isn't really what cassettes want to do, because finally in a million years they can actually roam free and explore new locations and things safe from Megaton. 

Cassettes admit that they aren't really loyal to their leader, only participating in war because their caretaker, Soundwave, was loyal to Megaton...though his loyal shifted and now his loyalty revolves around keeping his cassettes safe because Megatron won't be nice if he finds out. So he keeps up his appearances, while he lets his cassettes roam free.

Bumblebee understands that situation is complicated, but he sees this as an opportunity to end this stupid war. After all, Soundwave is highly regarded by Megatron, so maybe he can work with this.

Buzzsaw thought asks what they are gonna do now as they failed the task, which is quickly decided to shift all blame onto Bumblebee, even for future situations like this as Bee revealed that he can sense from far away from anyone. Ravage realized it’s the reason why he and others were never able to catch him! So after this being decided they went back and Bee returned to Ark, sharing this only with Sari, Windblade, and Optimus Prime for security reasons, he doesn't want to blow cassettes cover by accident.

Infiltrating Nemesis again.

Bumblebee isn't having a good time. He gets forced into reboot more frequently than it used to, especially during battles with Decepticons. Autobots had to save him multiple times, which was a blow to his self-esteem. Not to mention Sunstreaker was at him again, insulting the scout. Bumblebee yelled at him in return ( something that never happened before), he gets angrier and more frustrated. His best friends are doing their best to help, but there is little they can do.

Ratchet examined him and scanners show that the spark shell is losing its integrity, as it wears off over time. That explained why so many reboots happened recently. He says that Bumblebee shouldn't go on the missions at all, and Optimus agrees with this. Bee doesn't take it well, believing they think he’s now being useless to them, and storms off.

Then he sneaks out at night, planning to infiltrate the Nemesis again with two purposes: to prove that he is still useful to Autobots and to find out what Shockwave is up to ( it still bothers him a lot).

He sneaks in like usual and at first, it was okay, but then the vent under him broke ( yeah those vents are worn off over so many years too) and he fell right before the Seeker Trio. So the chase begins, Bee still can get away and he knows the ship but suddenly an unfortunate thing happens - his spark malfunction again and sends him into forced reboot.

Next time he awakens, he’s being restrained on some sort of medical table, which Bee quickly recognizes where he is - in Shockwave quarters. That sends terror to his spark, not only he’s been caught and Autobots don't know where he is, but he’s at mercy of the mad scientist. 

He tried to break free, but it’s useless, he never had much strength anyway. He looks around, and among his various projects, he sees something like a spire blueprint projected on the screen. It seems like it’s part of Nemesis. He doesn't like this at all. 

Shockwave enters the rooms, carrying various tools with him. Bee asks what he’s gonna do with him. The scientist doesn't reply first as he runs the scanner over Bee’s entire body ( while he’s changing the project on his scene meanwhile), it detects something in Bee’s spark chamber. 

Bee asks why Shockwaves keeps doing this,( like his sick experiments that even Megatron did not approve of). To this, the scientist replies that this war is going way too long and it will never end. So he decided to have a little fun while he can, he wants to relish in chaos and see the world burn.

He says that Bumblebee is carrying something interesting inside and he wants to find it. Shockwave activates his cutting tool and gets closer, intending to cut Bumblebee open.

Thankfully, salvation comes in an unusual form, Soundwave enters the room and demands to hand Bumblebee to him. Shockwave is not amused and refuses, so both argue until Shockwave gets an order directly from Megatron because the warlord wants Soundwave to dig intel out of elusive Autobot scout. After that, Shockwave can do whatever he wants with the prisoner.

Bee sighs with relief as he is escorted to Soundwave quarters. He doesn't make an attempt to escape, he can't really run away with a stasis cuff one + hr wants to get more insight on the Communication Officer. Maybe Soundwave knows what Shockwave is planning.

When they arrive, Bumblebee gets fully restrained again, and he’s mind gets connected to Soundwave’s systems ( via a cord) to start digging thought Bee’s mind ( if I remember correctly, Soundwave can read minds and emotions bc he can sense electric impulses in the processor or brain, he using cord here bc he wants to do deeper). 

Bee is pretty calm about this, he doesn't carry any useful intel ( he usually drops it at Teletraan-1 when he completes the duty). So Soundwave is stuck with casual memories while looking for any indication of the AllSpark, though he comments on Bee's good drumming skills.

Meanwhile, Ravage self-ejects from Soundwave’s chest and be like “dude seriously how the fuck did you get caught?? what are you doing even?”. Bee asks if they know anything about Shockwave’s plans. Such a question surprises both Decepticons, Bee understands that they don't know anything. Ravage doesn't like the sound of this and asks Bee to elaborate, but before he can answer, the scout looks to the side, sensing Megatron is coming in this direction. 

Ravage quickly transforms and tucks himself back into Soundwave’s cassette deck. In a minute, the warlord himself entered the room. He is pleased to see Soundwave already working on the task, while he turns to Bumblebee to take a good look at him as he never has seen the scout, who ruined a lot of his plans, up close - Bee would always be in the distance or lingering on the corners of Megatron’s optics before vanishing out of sight.

Megatron is acting pretty smug as a big nuisance in his grasp, though he admits he feels like he saw Bee’s face somewhere ( same reaction as Prime). He starts monologuing about how it would be great if Bumblebee would join him, they would win this war quickly. Maybe the little scout would convince Optimus Prime to join them, to which Bee asked if Megatron is still salty about Optimus breaking up with him.

That quickly pisses Megatron off, he grabs scout's neck and pins him heavily on the table, saying that he should watch his mouth. Bee isn't having this, replying ( as much as he can with his throat squeezed) that Megatron is an insolent fool who only focuses to keep Starscream on a leash, while Shockwave is plotting under his nose.

Megatron would probably hurt Bumblebee after this, but Sundewave reminded his leader that he’s still working and needs the scout in pieces. Megatron gives the order to continue, while he leaves. Both Bee and Soundwave sigh in relief, the latter commenting that the scout should keep it down in Megatron’s presence, to which Bee replies that someone had to say this.

Soundwave soon stumbles upon the Vector Sigma seal, locking the rest of Bumblebee’s memories. Soundwave asks Bee about this, to which the scout gives him the honest answer - he doesn't know how it got there and it’s been there already when he “first” woke up. Bumblebee asks if Soundwave can break it. The communication officer makes a few attempts, but it doesn't affect the seal at all. They need Victory Sigma, but it’s gone.

Bee expressed his frustration because he felt like the answer lies beneath it, but he said that he will find a way to stop Megatron. Soundwave replies that it’s impossible, but Bee doesn't buy this, he noticed the other reaction and it was hopeful.  

Bumblebee also notices multiple sparkpulses inside Soundwave, his cassettes, but only 5 of them are active, while there are many more of them, and those cassettes are being stasis. Bee asks Soundwave how long they’ve been asleep. Soundwave pauses, not expecting that question, and they reply that they have been in stasis since the beginning of the war.

Bee now understands, Soundwave has been working hard for Megatron, wanting to end the war as quickly as possible ( that was a motivation for a lot of Decepticons as Bee found out when they reached out for him), while sparing most of his cassette the trauma.

They sat in silence for a minute before Megatron contacted Soundwave, demanding his presence somewhere while ordering to leave a cassette to guard the prisoner. Soundwave sits for another minute, communicating with these cassettes, then ejects Ravage and leaves the room.

Ravage stands still, listening to the environment and making sure the coast is clear, then tells Bumblebee “you broke out using shock bombs, understood?” and releases the scout. Bee quickly gets up, thanking the cat. To that Ravage says “Go left now, I’ll give you ten seconds”. Bee nods and runs out of the room. 

After ten seconds the alarms burst on, informing that the prisoner had escaped. For convenience, Bee uses a few shock bombs he has with him as Decepticons try to stop him. 

He gets out, though he’s also pretty beaten up and it takes hours for him to get back to Ark ( he couldn't transform). He collapses then he crosses the entrance.

When Bee awakens, he’s on a medical table. His body is fixed, though Ratchet gave the minibot an earful of lecture for defying his recommendations and now Bee’s spark shell is even more strained. Prime also talks to Bee, reassuring the scout that no, Optimus and other Autobots don’t see him as burned and he doesn't have to go to such lengths to prove himself ( those conversations happened often back on Cybertron).

Bee doesn't reply, yet the give into he gathered when he was stuck on Nemesis.

Soon after this, Bee actually gets to talk with Sunstreaker to resolve their issue. The taller Autobot admits that he’s been projecting a lot because he used to be like Bumblebee when he was younger. Then he was envious because, despite everything, Bee remains kinds and hopeful. The scout tells him it takes a lot of work to keep being him after all those tragedies he had witnessed. Sunstreaker nods, though he still doesn't understand who Bee can easily move on after leaving Cybertron, it was their home after all. 

Bumblebee simply said that Cyberton didn’t feel like home, but prison.

And then the shit gets real!

Optimus decided to take another chance to negotiate peace with Megatron. They gathered near Nemesis, both Autobots and Decepticons just chilling (some interacting, like cassettes hanging out with Bee-Blade-Sari trio) while their leaders were negotiating. 

At first there heated arguments between the two leaders, Megatron acting like Optimus is the one being unreasonable and trying to blame him, while Optimus being like “listen you started this shit, you have no one to blame but yourself” (more politely of course). Soon, they both calmed down and actually made progress, as Megatron noticed that a lot of Decepticons are being distracted by various Earthian things because it’s all new in a million years.

Before they could proclaim anything, Shockwave appeared. Bee tenses instantly, this can't be good. I haven't decided if Shockwave would monologue or not, but the end is the same - he shoots Bumblebee in the chest.

Before anyone can react, Shockwave snatches the minibot and lifts him to his level, taking a closer look at the wound. The shoot wasn't direct, but tangential - it made a hole in the chest and partly chipped away the protective shell, leaving Bee’s spark partly exposed.

The energy is pulsing through the hole now( while Bee’s pulse gets completely haywire as he tries to free himself), the signature, and the effect is unmistakable - this is the AllSpark.  The amount of shock is impossible to describe, after all, Bee was carrying the AllSpark within himself and no one had an idea. Even Shockwave did not expect THAT!

Megatron is being evil smug again, now the AllSpark within his grasp! Except Shockwave has other plans. Instead, he activates his device, which was built into Nemesis. This spire was designed to fuck over all lifeforms on this planet ( including cybertronians), and with AllSpark his plan to cause massive chaos gets perfect as the AllSpark not only creates but also destroys. 

As he was about to rip the AllSpark out of Bee’s body, this system got overwhelmed, but instead of rebooting, his body discharged the energy, creating a big wave that threw everyone away.

Bumblebee meanwhile is screaming in pain ( the AllSpark is slowly breaking him apart) and a surge of painful memories ( the wave broke the seal). Not to mention he’s surrounded and pretty sure he might die, if he wants to get through this - he must become stronger to protect himself.

That thought activates the interface, the Vector Sigma interface. It already had something set up there. Bee can’t really see what it is, something about protective armor(?), he confirms it, the interface turned into a small cell that absorbed a portion of AllSpark energy. Then, as if he knows what to do, he slams the cell into the ground.

For a moment nothing happened, then suddenly a huge amount of plant-like-black vine material burst from the ground. Everyone instantly got into their sense after that blast, now witnessing those vines connecting to Bee’s chest and the AllSpark, lifting him off the ground and begin forming something BIG.

Decepticons are trying to shoot those vines, but hey, they re heat resistant quickly grow back :) Autobots are trying to contact the scout, but his comm is dead, Windblade cannot get into him minds as it’s filled with so many negative emotions like rage, grief, desperation, depression. Said emotions also floored Soundwave, making him unable to move.

Soon Bumblebee ( or more like the huge shell that was growing around him) formed into a big, dragon-like creature, who leats out of deafening roar at AllSpark energy shoots everywhere. An he’s so angry that everyone around him can feel it in their sparks.

This is how he looks, he’s strong enough to throw big cybertronians around like chew toys. Bumblebee’s body is cocooned in the chest area, the light from the AllSpark shines through crevasses.

Despite being angry, he doesn’t attack first and Optimus could have reasoned with him, but Megatron decided it was a good idea to attack the bigger monster and this is when the shit gets loose. 

Bumblebee trashes around, causing chaos around him, sometimes targeting someone and going after them for a few moments. All this is followed by energy discharges, so he successfully beats the shit out of everyone.

Shockwave is the only one who is pleased with surprise results, as he tried to collect data.

Soon Windblade manages to get a hold of her best friend’s mind and he tries to calm Bee down. He slows down a bit, which opens an opportunity for Sari to get inside thought crevasses and try to locate him.

She follows the opposite direction from energy flow, and soon she finds him. His face is a mix of anger and fear, Sari starts talking, trying to draw his attention to her. Soon enough he notices her ( the beast stops moving).

Bee tells her that he’s scared and he’s in pain. His body cracks more because even this large shall not contain all the power of the AllSpark. She hugs his head, telling that they will figure this out, but first hee need to stop thrashing around, he’s hurting everyone. 

Meanwhile, Windblade does the same, using telepathy to talk to him. It worked and they always convinced him to just fly towards the Ark, but Shockwave wasn’t having that, and started shooting at Bumblebee, trying to provoke him. Bee is sort of back to his senses, seeing Shockwave again, angers him to the point that this anger throws Windblade out of his mind. Sari is alright, but the expressions on Bee’s face terrified her. 

Bees run and pines Shockwave to the ground. Suddenly he speaks ( his voice sounds very distorted when it comes from the beast) telling him in space that Shockwave is the one who destroyed Cybertron and left them homeless. the mad scientist chuckles, commenting that this means his “pet project” had worked and he regrets nothing.  

Bumblebee executes Shockwave without mercy.

After Bumblebee flies up heads towards the Ark, Windblade flies after him, while Optimus uses this moment to gather Autobots and get the hell out of there. Sari tells him over comms that Bee is breaking, so he asks Ratchet to drive ahead and help Bumblebee.

Bee meanwhile is almost there, but his body cannot take this anymore. The chest opens up and Bumblebee with Sari falls out of the monster( then the husk falls down and lands right by the entrance of Ark). They both fall for a few seconds before the AllSpark shatters into small pieces and they fly in different directions. Windblade caught them both, both saw what happened and got really scared that Bee might be dead. 

There is small light coming from his exposed spark chamber, so Blade rushes to the medical bay, while frantically explaining to Ratchet ( who is on the way) what just happened. He instructs them to stabilize Bumblebee, enforcing he gets in and takes over.

Ratchet barely managed to save Bee’s life. After that, it took a lot of time to put the minibot together ( between all other urgent repairs of other Autobots that got fucked up by Bee’s outrage). Now, when the danger has passed, Ratchet can get a better look at scout’s sparks chamber that was hidden under the shell. Said shell was crumbled, he had to remove it. Then tells others what he’s discovered: 

First, his spark still hosts a few AllSpark shards. He tried to remove it but it turned out that Bee’s spark IS merged with the AllSpark. His system even pings errors about missing components. This is ironic because it made sense that the AllSpark was causing erratic sparkpulses, but yet they cant separated it from him;

Second, he discovered that Bee also has Vector Sigma installed in his spark chamber, this is exactly those missing components from the broken device;

Third, now there is a plant ( it looks exactly like that vine from earlier) parasite residing in Bee’s body, it appears to be feeding on AllSpark energy. Ratchet tried to remove it, it slapped him on the face. It resists and refuses to come off.

It raises so many questions, of how and why Bee got both AllSpark AND Vector Sigma. There was a suggestion that Bee could steal, or maybe all of this was some sick experiment that Shockwave did, though now they won’t know with the mad scientist dead. Windblade feels that she was involved in this, but still has no idea how.

She still cannot stop thinking about what she saw in Bee’s mindspace during the rampage. He was overwhelmed by grief, sadness, pain, guilt and all of this he merged into anger. And that he carried this angger for a really long time, longer that any of them can imagine. Ratchet is sure that Bee cannot be older, but who knows. Perhaps Bumblebee had a different body in the past that was destroyed.

After a week Bee wakes up. Of course, he’s being hugged by Blade and Sari, everyone sighed with relief. Optimus asks if Bee remembers anything from the meeting. The scout thinks for a moment. He remembers being shot, he remembers paint and panic and anger, he definitely remembers killing Shockwave. He doesn’t know who to feel about it.

He also informed him about a plant parasite. Bee is surprised, but he feels fine for far.

He’s upset when he learns that he beat everyone up and proceeds to apologize before every Autobot that was involved in this. He also sees his discarded husk outside of the Ark, which is examined by Wheeljack and Perceptor (  and wondering if human culture influenced Bee to make this creature look like one of the monsters from his video games).

He doesn’t have any recollection of making it, though this form seems familiar...probably he saw that dragon in a video game...probably.

Bee walks around the island to clear his head, being joined by Sari and Windblade. He admits that he is partly scared that he killed Shockwave like this...but on hand, he’s relieved that this guy is gone and Earth is safe for now. 

The scout also tells them that he remembered something during that fight that he could remember before. He tried again, but now it feels like his memories are scattered - they are there, but out of reach. 

To see what’s going on, Windblade uses her abilities to get into Bee’s mind. She sees that the Vector Sigma seal is gone ( tho her own is still active), but now all those memories that were locked are either missing or corrupted. Even those that weren’t locked are broken. She hypothesized that the AllSpark shattering damaged his data banks, taking the portion of memories with shards. 

That is just another reason why they must collect the shards.

Good thing that Bee can sense the shards, most of them landed in the city, but some landed outside, even near Nemesis which isn’t good. Later they come back and inform Prime about this and the high command starts formulating the plans of retrieving shards.

Meanwhile Wheeljack, Ratchet, and Sari brainstorm ideas of how to prevent the AllSpark from harming Bumblebee. The plant is absorbing the portion of energy, but it’s clear he still needs a shell. Sari tells them that Sumdac Systems will provide resources for the project.

Collecting the shards.

In general, the collecting of shards will go smoothly for most of the time, since most shards landed in the city. Some they found just laying in the bushes or roofs, some were handled by humans, some were even sent by mail. As new shards rejoin Bumblebee, Windblade helps him to restore his recent memories, while they still need to complete AllSpark to get access to previously locked memories.

Ratchet also keeps in check Bee’s health as new shards are added, and gradually builds a shell around the spark chamber, minding the plant.

So, few thing that happened during this time frame in no particular order:

Starscream got his hands onto one of the shards and caused chaos to both Decepticons and Autobots, he can even use it to get through the force field around the city;

Bumblebee created Grimlock, using an awesome t-rex animatronic as a base;

Thundercracker leaving Decepticons, thought he didn't go to Autobots either. He talks with Windbladem admitting that it was terrifying to see someone like Bumblebee so hurt ( he’s referring to that dragon accident) because of the war;

Discovering that the plant, living inside Bee is actually a symbiont - it protects its host when Bee is in danger, even helping him to lift a weight that Bee couldn't before ( though his body hurts a lot after this). Sari names it Clover ( in fact she did it with all Bee’s plants);

When the last shard is gathered, Ratchet doesnt final touches to the shell. He doesn't completely seal it away, letting it’s potions flow through Bumblebee’s body. This should reduce chances of forced reboot, thought they still might happen.

After this, Bumblebee secludes himself in his room, wanting to sort through all his memories, as those old one now finally accessible. After a few days he asks Windblade to come, He removes her Vector Sigma seal, and they talk through all those events. 

Soon Bumblebee requests Autobots together ( who can come, if someone can't, then they will be sent the recorded version of this) in front of Ark ( where the husk is) because there is something that everyone must know. He also asks Soundwave to send Laserbeak to the meeting, so she can record this conversation and present it to other Decepticons, Megatron included. Soundwave obliges, sending Bee his regards.

The truth behind the AllSpark.

Now with all his memories intact, Bumblebee reveals that he’s not the guardian or an weird experiment involving the AllSpark, but he IS the AllSpark.

That one thing was enough to shock everyone( accepts Windblade). At first they thought that technically yes, bc Bee’s spark fused the AllSpark, but Bee elaborates that he was created by Primus billions years ago. Windblade confirmed it, as she knows the truth already. 

To clear the confusion, Bumblebee starts from the beginning. 

Primus was wandering around the Universe. Like any giant with planet alt-form, he had one desire - to create and host a life. While he could easily transform, create a new life, and then fall into eternal slumber, Primus wanted to leave someone in charge. Thus he created the AllSpark - a powerful transformer who can create, destroy and maintain life on the planet. 

This person is Bumblebee, with a dragon-like altform, that looked almost exactly like that husk that now is resting in front of Ark.

Before Bee proceeded to his duties, he and Primus traveled around the Universe. Primus was teaching Bumblebee about life, about conditions required for life to exist, about material and what kind of life he can make. They visited planets, filled with various life forms: organic, silicone, energoinds and even other mechanical lifeforms.

Bee was observing living beings, learning about how they build, how they function, how they interact.

When the training was finished and Bee was ready, they traveled to a lone orange dwarf star(class K). Primus transformed and placed himself onto orbit. After this Bumblebee created the first cybertronian life. 

In thousands of years he filled the planets with divine ecosystems, with various biomes and huge species diversities and even first sentient beings. For most of the time he left anything for natural selection, while keeping a close eye on it in case something appears that will threaten life on the planet. In this case, by his protocols, he must kill that being in order to preserve balance.

He admits, while he loved his job and enjoyed creating, he was lonely. Primus advised against forming a relationship with his creations because he thought that Bumblebee’s powers could be misused in this case, for example getting involved in conflict where he could be persuaded to insta-kill someone. 

So he stayed out, but it hurt and he longed for companionship more than anything, which led to frustration and even anger at his creator for leaving alone for eternity.

Still, Bumblebee endured this and continued his work.

Peace lasted for a long time  ( if you don't think of the wars that were waged between clans from time to time), until Quintessons began their invasion on Cybertron. At first they couldn't set their tentacles there as Bee was such a fierce protector, but much later they figured out to send drones to fight instead. That posed a problem for Bumblebee because yes, he can easily kill a living being, but cannot kill what isn't alive in the first place. 

Bumblebee held endless hordes of drones for a long time, but eventually he was overwhelmed by numbers ( he was fighting alone, as cybertronians back there were no match to Quinesson’s forces) and killed.

Cybertron fell to Quintessons and everyone was enslaved.

Then Quintessons salvaged his spark( The AllSpark) and few more components to use the power of creation to create even more slaves. At first they couldn't use AllSpark, because it has quantuum properties. It creates endless possibilities, but none of their devices has enough strong sensors to set those possibilities, making them real.

Lucky for them, the components they got from Bumblebee’s dead body were connected to the AllSpark, with them Quintessons created Vector Sigma, a device that allows manipulation of the AllSpark.

They kept creating slayes, while completely ignoring anything else and soon all those diverse ecosystems that Bee made collapsed. The rain turned into acid, rust was crawling everywhere as Quintessons kept draining resources of the planet, while they tried to erase everything about Primus and AllSpark from cybetronian’s culture. While cybertronians still remembered Primus, the AllSpark was forgotten.

Hearing this was disturbing, considering the fact that after cybertronians liberated themselves from Quinesson’s tyranny - they kept using Vector Sigma for forging new bots.

Bumblebee wasn't too angry about this, they simply didn't know. Then he gets asked if he was killed, how Bumblebee is still here?

Short answer is they only destroyed his body. To explain this, Bumblebee reminds everyone how sparks work. Sparks are the lifeforce of every living being, but for sentient beings it also serves like a second brain/processor to process the emotion response.

But in Bumblebee’s case it’s the other way around: his spark is the main processor, while the head processor is for emotional response and processing the info from sensors. Primus made him like this in case Bumblebee's gonna get killed at some point so he could rebuild himself.  

Sadly, because they quickly salvaged him, removing both his spark and components that we connected to it and separating them - that made rebuilding impossible. 

And because of his spark’s quantuum nature, Bumblebee’s consciousness was locked in a quantum state, making him both existing and not existing at the same time.

He could only watch what’s happening. He was grieving over his work being destroyed, his creations being enslaved and potentially being forever stuck in quantuum sea, not able to interact with the real world again. 

The time went by, and eventually, cybertronians livetred themself from Quintessons and it marked the beginning of the Golden Age. Bumblebee was lingering, watching this happen. He was a bit happier after this, despite the fact that society was locked in functionalism( when both's place in society is defined by their alt form. Like a jet could only serve in the army) - a leftover from Quintesson tyraty. Still, it was better than Quintessons!

Bumblebee continues lingering, sometimes he floats in the form of a random bot and asks if they can see him. Usually it never works, but one day, one bot was able to hear him. Bee was ecstatic about this, finally he could talk to someone ( even though his talking was mere whisper as he forgot how his own voice used to sound). He introduced himself as Bumblebee ( it was one of many names that was given to him by his creations during ancient times that he liked a lot).

Bee thought maybe he could tell someone the truth about AllSpark origin and maybe that would help him to get back to the real world, but sadly none of his attempts were successful. Some don't believe him, some did but were punished by strict government. Additionally as Bee realised that only those who can psychic abilities can hear him. And those bots are extremely rare.

Still, Bumblebee wasn't losing hope, and kept trying ( though he was being more thoughtful about getting his friend in trouble). 

At some point, another big event happened - a gladiator named Megatron, with his partner, archivist Orion Pax ( who will later be known as Optimus Prime) created a revolution that liberated cybertronians from cages of functionalism. Now every cybertronian could be whoever they wanted, that pleased Bumblebee so much.

Not to mention now he has more chances to escape his quantuum prison, especially when a group of archaeologists has found a hidden temple that was dedicated to AllSpark - the only one that wasn't destroyed by Quintessons.

Even Megatron with Optimus came to see these fins. The most noticeable thing was the statue which archaeologists believed was the personification of AllSpark, which was an image of Bumblebee. 

(That made Optimus realise why Bumblebee’s face was so familiar when he first met him. Sure the form is different, but the face remains the same( and same goes to Megatron).)

At the same time a group of scientists noticed some quantum fluctuation comic from the AllSpark and they were going to research this. 

During this timeframe, Bee was really close to being found. He was really close to escaping. 

But as if fate decided to fuck everyone over, things changed from best to worst.

It all started when everyone realised that Cybertron will be completely drained of resources in a few millions years. That caused the frantic search of planets where they could get them. One planet that was relatively close was found. It was rich and solved this problem...but it also hosted life.

Heated arguments began, Megatron believed that they can just go and take it, because they really needed it and they are superior to this primitive form of life on that planet. Optimus on other hand refused to harm those lifeforms, even if they are primitive, that they can look elsewhere.

Bumblebee sided with Optimus, he knew the fact that there is another system near that one, that is rich with resources they need AND also unsuitable for life. He knew it in case if he ever needed those resources he could go and get them back in the day when he was in charge here.

Bee frantically searched for someone who could hear him, so he could pass this information...but he had no luck. Soon the civil war began and it was the beginning of the end.

As war was going on, Bumblebee lost all hope. He saw destruction he hadn't seen since Quintessons invasion and Cybertron’s reasons were thinning. Soon there were no resources to make new bots.

Bumblebee tight there is nothing he can do and was saddened about upcoming doom. 

Until and stumbled upon Windblade.

She was able to hear him. So they talked a lot and became close. Bee told her everything about himself, and when Blade was going to tell Optimus about Bee, he stopped her. Bumblebee was scared he's gonna be punished somehow ( it happened before in the past) but instead he has a plan, but he needs her help. She agrees, and waits until Bee is done with preparation.

Soon Bumblebee tells her about it, even a bit more urgently because he just saw Shockwave unleashing something that will kill everything and they need to get off the planet.

But first, Bumblebee needs a body. Now, when the Chamber of Creation isn't occupied anymore, Windblade sneaked inside ( Bee was carefully guiding her) the Spire, then got into the Chamber. 

He instructed her to activate Vector Sigma, then managed to upload a blueprint to her data banks that she was able to upload to Vector Sigma. 

Then he told her to set specific parameters, allowing the systems that were used for assembling bodies to scrap for resources. It was barely enough, still it gathered resources for a small body, compromising something like strength and armor. 

Then he told her to cut open Vector Sigma and get important components - the very same components that belonged to him long ago and install them to the body's spark chamber.

The last step was taking the AllSpark, placing it in a spark chamber and sealing it in a protective shell that will suppress the AllSpark frequency.

When Windblade did all this, she waited. It was silent for a few minutes and she was anxious that the plant might not get worse...before the body powered up and for the first time in seemingly forever, Bumblebee opened his optics.

This was probably the happiest day of his life since he lost his body. He hugged Windblade, thanking her for getting him out. After adjusting and remembering how to walk to transformers, they left the Spire.

But now they had to figure out what to do. When Megatron finds out that AllSpark is gone, hell will break loose and they cannot have the AllSpark being taken again. 

Bee cannot really protect himself. His body is fragile and will fall apart if he to unshesh his powers. And Decepticons like Soundwave can dig into one's mind to find out their secret. So it leads to a drastic solution - to seal any memories of him away. Blade doesn't want this, but understands it’s their only shotm so she agrees.

First they position themself near Autobot base.

Then Bumblebee activates his Vector Sigma interface, programming the seal in a specific way, so while memories are locked away, some feelings will linger. This will allow Bumblebee and Windblade to become friends again, and will also carry on the missing to make cybertronians leave the planet.

First he places the seal into Windblade’s data banks, which will activate in a few minutes and reboot her system. So it gives her time to arrive to base and be safe when memories are going to be locked away. She hugs him again before he leaves sayin “see you on the other side”.

Then he gets close to the road where Jazz soon appears, then he seales all his memories completely. The reboot happens and he falls on the ground, where next moment he’s being found by Jazz. 

The rest of the story everyone knows.

Bumblebee gives free minutes for everyone to process the whole thing. It explained a lot of things: his reboots, his ability to sense sparks, that husk’s creation,  pretty much everything.

So he’s being bombarded with questions, one of them was about what Shockwave did. Interestingly enough Bee never told Blade what exactly the mad scientist did. Bee tried to answer, but turned out he just cannot say this out of loud, that’s how terrible it was. Seeing the pained expression on Bumblebee’s face, everyone quickly moved on to different questions. 

Another question was about Primus, because Bee made it sound like Primus was just one of many beings like him. Bumblebee reveals that in fact, Earth is also giant like Primus, and unlike his creator, she can communicate with Bee during the recharge. 

So she’s asleep, but can talk to Bee when he’s asleep too. In fact he made a lot of attempts to connect, but because the AllSpark was sealed under shell, Bee could not hear her clearly. Until now.

She was asking if he can resurrect her two companions, who turned out to be Venus and Mars -  two other giants that came to this system with her. Something went wrong when both transformed to planets that caused their deaths, rendering planets unsuitable to life. 

Sadly, Bumblebee can only create or kill, he cannot bring the dead back. Once spark crosses the dimension and appears in the Well of All Sparks, it gets cleaned. It's a point of no return and the only direction for spark to go is forward -  to it's new life.

After the meeting is over, Bee turns to Laserbeak, making sure that all this information was received by Soundwave, which she confirms. Now they can only hope for better, that this is gonna be enough to stop Megaton from his fruitless conquest.

Then he goes on another walk around the forest, thinking about his past, present and future. Despite everything, he’s glad he lived to this point. He has what he always wanted( aka companionship) and now there is a chance for everyone to thrive once again, along with humans.

The final stretch.

Of course, nothing can be that easy. 

Soon after the big reveal, the entire Soundwave cassette horde( aka even those who were in stasis since the beginning of the war) arrives at the Ark’s entrance. They look terrified and begging for help. When asked what happened, Ravage told Bee that Megatron didn't take the news well when Soundwave presented that entire conversation to Decepticons.

Soundwave tried to reason with his leader, but Megatron got mad and hurt Soundwave, then he was going to hurt the cassettes as punishment, which resulted in fight and Soundwave ejecting every single one and telling them to run.

So they ran and came here, begging to save Soundwave.

This makes Bumblebee energon boil in his tubes, he’s almost jumped into his husk body to just run and tear Megatron apart, but he managed to calm himself. Optimus decided to go and deal with Megatron himself, and Bee tags along. 

When they meet again with Megatron near Nemesis again, first Optimus demands to release Soundwave. Somehow they convince him to do so, and Autobots take him to Ark for repair and reunite him with cassettes.

Meanwhile Megatron demands Bumblebee to fix Cynertron, which turns into a heated argument, because there is literally nothing to fix. Bee cannot just magically undo all the damage. 

In the end Bumblebee snaps, and just decides to do what he really, really didn't want to do -  he wants to open the space bridge and show Megatron what is happening on Cybertron. If this won't help, he doesn't know what can. 

Bumblebee warns that they might not get out alive, but Megatron agrees anyway, believing that minibot still can fix their home planet. Optimus Prime also joins, refusing to leave Bumblebee alone with Megatron.

They arrive at the Chamber of Creation and look outside ( as they are on top floor). The Spire is the only building that is still sanding, meanwhile anything else lay in ruins. Megatron is confused, he doesn't remember leaving Cynertron in such a terrible state.

Bumblebee asks them if they can see those drones. They cannot, asking what drones. He sighs, understanding they have to go to ground level and that's actually scary.  Still, he activated the elevator and they went down.

At entrance they stop and now they see - countless tiny drones consuming metal, then multiplying. And their hunger knows no bounds. 

Bumblebee reveals that those “Scraplets” were created by Shockwave in order to cause chaos among Autobots. But they didn't work as he intended he just threw them away. They landed near Cyberton’s core, which activated them...and they began to consume everything in sight. When Scaplets got to Cybertron lavras ( it’s like the immune system of the planet) and Bee felt their deaths, he knew the time was up and they needed to run.

Now it made sense why Bumblebee killed this mad scientist in the first place.

Megatron asks if Bumblebee can kill them, but Bee says he can only kill living beings,while those things are just sparkless drones and they will devour him quickly.

After a minute, Megatron sighs in defeat, telling Bumblebee he can take them back to Earth.

He nods and about to open a portal...then suddenly his spark is acting up again, sending a huge power surge around him. Once again he is forced into rebooting before he can open a portal.

This caught the attention of scraplets and they charged at bost. Optimus grabs Bee, and both he and Megatron start running. First they tried to make it to the elevator, but it was already being chewed.

So they were forced to take stairs. So Optimus carrying Bee, and dragging Megatron with him, Megatron is shooting from his fusion cannot, breaking shit to slow down scraplets. 

When they reach the top floor, they have nowhere to run. Megatrons asks how soon Bee will be back online, which according to Optimus’s chronometers is 3 more minutes. Megatron feels that they don't have it and suddenly the entire building is rumbling.

Because it’s being eaten, it starts falling, while scraplets are seeping inside the chamber. Two bots look at each other, and do the leap of faith ( while holding onto each other and Bumblebee of course). Just before they hit infested ground, Bee suddenly wakes up and he opens a portal. All three fall into it and are transported back to Earth.

Panicked they look around for scraplets that could be transported with them, but thankfully there was none. They are safe.

Optimus is surprised that Bee woke up earlier, and the minibot himself is surprised as well. Though he quickly realised it’s because of his plants symbiont + new shell combinations - his system still gets overwhelmed, but not as drastically as before, allowing his system to recover quicker.

After this, Megatron allows Autobots to leave in peace, while he still needs to process everything he saw.

Later ( with Optimus help) he declares that war is over and that Earth is their new home, which was surprisingly received well by other Decepticons ( he told them what he saw).

Finally Bumblebee can sigh in relief, finally they can have a bright future ahead of them and  he’s looking forward to it.

Trivia( aka random stuff I didn't know where to fit).

Cybertronians can breathe and it’s part of their air cooling system, as such a process allows them to quickly inhale cooler air and exhale hot air. When calm they don't actually breathe, but as soon they are scared/excited/in a fight - they start doing this;

They can also cry, and it’s also part of the cooling system. Processors and spark chambers tend to be heated more than anything and require cooling by liquid nitrogen. When strong emotional responses happen, heating goes off the charts, and because optics are so close to the head processor - there is a risk of melting them. So the liquid nitrogen gets pumped to optics as well, and because this liquid has a low boiling point - those tears take a form of gas, seeping through the space between optic and face. Older bots don't cry much because they kinda get used to horrors of the war, while younger like Bee are actually more emotional and showing it often. Even after restoring his memories fully, he’s still emotion as hell;

Bumblebee is sleepwalking sometimes, and if he sees another person he starts whispering “Can you see me?” over and over until he gets the “right” reasons which is “Yes, I can see you, Bumblebee”. After this he falls back to recharge. That scared a lot of Autobots first, they discovered the right answer when Optimus replied, thanks to his tendency to give full and polite answers. This happens because of trauma when Bee lost his body and became “non-existent” to anyone;

He used to terrify Decepticons when he infiltrated their bases  to the point they thought that Bee was some sort of Autobot vengeful spirit that came to hunt them. Bumblebee used his abilities to avoid his enemies, while toying with them, like lingering at the corners of their optics before disappearing and even whispering”Can you see me?” right into their audio sensors.);

When Decepticosn arrived on Earth, Bumblebee was an anxious mess, he was afraid that Earth might die just like Cybertron did. To give himself hope and a way of coping, he remembered the legend that if you fold 1000 origami cranes, your wish will come true. He made the first crane soon after Decepticon’s arrival, and the last right before he received his last AllSpark shard. Now those cranes are everywhere on the Ark;

Spike visits Detroit at some point, but I haven't decided when. Probably when the AllSpark shattered, so he helped to restore it too;

Bumblebee has two strong phobias: 

Athazagoraphobia. The fear of being forgotten, ignored, or abandoned; 

Monophobia. The fear of being alone for a long time;

In future, humans figured out the way to transport their mind into their spark and then transport that spark into techno-organic bodies which ultimately extends their lifespan.

Sari was one of first humans doing this, not wanting to leave Bumblebee and Windblade;

Spike, on the other hand, decided to die of old age because he felt like he did everything he wanted and his journey reached his end. Bee was really upset about this, but let Spike go. Spike spent his last moments with Bee.

Also in the future, Bumblebee’s body gets an upgrade, restoring his original form alt-form (6 legged dragon), though it’s smaller than before, Bee used to be small and finally comfortable with this. He will also be in charge of creating new cybertronians and terraforming new planets;

This is how Bumblebee used to look like;

Here’s the statue that was discovered, that Optimus and Megatron saw before.

[megatronswaifu]

Nightlight defected from the Bots?! I must know MORE! :0

yes she did!!! it’s a long story BUT I’M SO HAPPY U WANNA KNOW MORE so i will try to do my best to relay it briefly…my writing is very abridged but it still does the job. this is the TFP version of her defection.

basically, nightlight came to earth on a stolen ship with her friends (other ocs who i haven’t really finalized – here are some doodles i did around a year ago), seiner, wheelhop (used to be named “popcorn” as a placeholder), and phase (used to be named rook before somebody pointed out that there’s already somebody named that). a gang of girls!

they are all a very silly and flawed bunch but they get along.

nightlight does not often go on missions because she is a scaredy cat and honestly isn’t very skilled at fighting, and she kind of just stays back. if she does go on missions, she usually ends up getting protected or rescued, so she tries to help in other ways.

one day, the gang of girls decides to go out on a stroll in an uninhabited (by humans) place on earth since they felt cooped up in the autobot base. there is literally no reason for cons to be around so they just decide to have fun.

sadly and very annoyingly, decepticons DO appear and they have to sprint their fucking afts off running and shooting back and hiding, until they can finally sit still enough for the biggest bot, seiner, to comm ratchet,

“ratchet!! ratchet we need a ground bridge! the decepticons found us!”

(rest of story and another doodle under cut)

ratchet pulls up a groundbridge and informs them that the bridge is on the right, on the other side of the mountain they’re currently hiding behind. they make a break for it, and sprint to the bridge. they hop right through, and to their horror and surprise, the room they hop into is purple. it’s dark. it’s got decepticons.

the ground bridge behind them closes, and the girls scatter around and run out the door. they get chased and are forced to run about what is presumably The Nemesis. they finally find a room in which nobody has followed them into or figured out they’re hiding in.

the girls begin to talk.

wheelhop: “WHAT THE SHIT WAS THAT I THOUGHT RATCHET GOT US A GROUND BRIDGE????”

seiner: “well uhh fuck obviously we didn’t go through it, what went wrong?”

phase (in cybertronian sign language, she is mute): “maybe we went through the wrong one.”

wheelhop: “you mean there was a decepticon bridge open at the same time?”

phase nods.

seiner (looking over at phase, with a considering expression): “seems like it.”

nightlight: “but, but ratchet said it was on the right…right?”

…on the “other right” of the mountain, a completely separate ground bridge sits. on that bridge’s other side, ratchet attempts to comm them, to no avail. the girls have accidentally run through another ground bridge that the decepticons were using to mobilize their own forces into the area, and had completely missed their own ground bridge because they went to the wrong “right”. they must come up with a plan to escape. seiner, being a leader-type, looks around the room. it looks like they found themselves in an unused monitor room.

seiner eyes one wall of monitors and says, “we might be able to access some sort of map from this computer. we can find our way out that way.”

nightlight: “we can’t call someone for help?”

phase: “decepticon technology blocks our signals.” she has stood up and is at the monitor, but she hesitates. phase turns to the group.

“if we access this computer, we will most likely notify the cons that we are in this room,” she signs. “as soon as i turn this monitor on, we are on a timetable. the nanosecond i get the map, we must go.”

all of them, very tense, sit in anticipation as phase accesses the monitor. lo and behold, the decepticons are notified, and a team of vehicons rushes towards the abandoned section of the ship. however, when they arrive, the door is open, and the girls have escaped the room.

meanwhile, in the airducts of the nemesis, the four of them crawl, squished, with a map of the ducts on phase’s arm-minimonitor. they traverse the map, having found a suitable way out, for several hours, trying not to get spotted, waiting for the longest periods of time for vehicons to leave areas so they can pass, and being incredibly stressed.

at one point, they must cross from a room and into a hallway to get to their last path. the hallway isn’t very populated, and only at the far end are some vehicons stationed, where nobody will see them, so although obviously very tense, they are not as afraid as they have been a few other times on this “adventure”.

first, phase, the navigator, and an expert at agility, jumps quietly out of the duct, into the room, and opens the door to the hallway. she peeks out. there is no-one. she swiftly emerges from the door and sprints to the other side, opening the other door on the opposite side they must enter.

second, wheelhop follows, a terrified but determined look on her face.

third, seiner, the big bot she is, tries her best to run across quietly.

fourth, nightlight crouches down outside the threshold of the door, propping her foot in a “ready, set, go” position, getting up the courage to run to the other side. her expression is nervous and she is shaking.

just as she is about to hop up, the voices of the vehicons down the hall they had previously not given a care to suddenly stop dead. nightlight’s helm shoots towards their position, to see soundwave, the decepticon third in command, walking down the hallway.

her helm whips again back to her friends, on the other side of the hallway, who all have their mouths open and optics wide as dinner plates. after taking a few seconds to be terrified, they all motion frantically for their friend to run to the other side as quickly as possible. but nightlight hesitates, and shakes her head frantically back. soundwave is too close! she’ll be seen! she doesn’t want to go. nightlight, with fluid pricking her optics, attempts to re-open the door they came from, but it seems it locked when she exited. she takes another look at her friends, and scared out of her spark, she curls into a ball, her helm between her legs, her arms around her kneejoints. if she stays small, he won’t see. if she stays in the crook between the door and the wall, she’ll be okay. he won’t see.

nightlight watches from between her legs as her friends sink into the room, and the third in command approaches from down the hallway, his shadow dangerously puddling closer. it passes over the floor and between her legs, and so do his pedesteps. nightlight, assuming her hiding technique has worked, lifts her helm. she is greeted with soundwave’s expressionless, petrifying helm, and one of the spymaster’s tentacles grappling her arm and yanking her harshly into the air. she shrieks, and is wordlessly taken off to some random place in the nemesis. as she is dragged off, she yelps and cries the names of her teammates in fear, but she cannot see them any longer.

wheelhop, seiner, and phase sit deathly silent in the vent they were forced to escape into. they eventually discuss; they are almost out. finding nightlight would take hours, possibly days if they were going to check literally the entire ship, because they had no clue where the interrogation rooms were (nothing much was labelled on the map). and they weren’t even sure she would be there. they could be killed, or worse, interrogated for information and then killed. it would be better to return to base and come back with a bigger rescue team. they were exhausted. after much deliberation, and despite it basically emotionally killing them do make this decision, they decide to continue on their path and escape the ship, without nightlight.

meanwhile, nightlight shivers in an interrogation room with knock out overlooking her, doing something on the monitor next to the table. she is not strapped to the table, as she is too small to reach the straps, so she is simply cuffed to one of said straps, with additional cuffs on her ankles and wrists. nightlight holds back desperately on tears. surely she will be tortured.

the little moped waits for something to happen. she expects to be killed or interrogated. there’s a bunch of surgical instruments (or, other things, nightlight can’t really tell what they are if she’s honest) on a table a few meters away and she’s about to cry. knock out is scary as the pits. she is helpless. suddenly, the cherry-red doctor is talking to someone on his comm.

and the door fucking opens. and megatron walks in.

and all her sense of decorum and self-regulation and “i should be a good bot and stay still” is thrown out the window in an instant, and she tries to jump up from the table, wailing and sure of her demise. she is going to die or be tortured and THEN die, and now, by the hands of megatron at that? she is faced with an autobot’s worst and scariest nightmare. why her?!

knock out has to yoink her back and hold one of her legs to the table, and really she’s not strong compared to him so it doesn’t take much effort. she is very small on main so you can understandably imagine how scary this looks like to the poor thing: a gigantic shadowy figure that frankly just looks like a dark tower, with searing red eyes, radiating with millennia of hatred for her kind, moving towards her. this is made even worse when she realizes the tower has walked very close, closer when she had last peeked through her servos, and is now reaching for her. she hyperventilates and cries out and kicks (or really, attempts to) when two humongous servos grab her legs, and all the minicon can do is babble pleas.  

to her surprise she feels the stasis cuffs unlock on her ankles and wrists, and she is slowly let go of to scramble away and curl up on the table, taking a second to sooth herself. nightlight eventually sneaks a look from behind her fingers to see megatron just standing there with a patient expression.

weirdly, knock out next to him with a “?????????what” look, completely baffled as to why megatron just uncuffed a prisoner. it seems he did not expect this either.

and megatron puts on his best Do Not Worry I Am Very Friendly face and says, “hello nightlight”. nightlight doesn’t respond, but still glances at him with a look of profound confusion.

and megatron sweet talks her for a while. asking her questions, talking as nicely as he can. and even though, to any sane bot viewing the scene, one would see megatron’s clear intentions of evil, our poor nightlight is immune to social cues. so, she’s thinking, “what’s happening?“ and all of this is…a lot.

eventually, megatron says, “nightlight, i’d like you to join our side.” the periwinkle bot thinks, “well this isn’t torture or death, but….” and megatron can tell she’s baffled, so he keeps talking.

“your friends left you,” he says firmly. nightlight’s face sours pitifully, and megatron continues, “they’ve already left the ship. i’m sure you heard the overhead comm announce we were no longer on lockdown.”

nightlight looks away, feelings clearly hurt, and he continues still, “they didn’t stay to rescue you. they escaped without even an attempt to come for you. they don’t see you as a valuable part of their team.”

and this very much hurts nightlight. this is exactly what she worries about, in her endeavors as a friend and as an autobot; that she is not a good and contributing team member. is she really that small, that bad at fighting, that dumb? megatron continues by saying, “but the decepticon army has a place for you.” she looks up for a second in hope, but not any longer, and megatron can tell she is very conflicted, so he changes the subject.

(and ok side note i have this idea that before tfp megatron went gladiator he was a miner. and he was marx on main in the mines and had already developed kind of a following, and the governmence was like 

“oh god oh fuck we can’t kill him he’s got too big of a following he might be seen as a martyr if WE kill him”

“well alright then government man #1 how about we put him in the gladiatorial pits. then we won’t be the ones to kill him. he’ll be taken care of and we won’t be blamed for it”

“very sexy idea government man #2!”

and they did it but megatron was tough as shit in the end and y’all all know what happened)

but anyways,megatron leans in closer as if sharing some sort of nice, secret moment with her, “i know you used to work in the mines, nightlight.” and this is true. nightlight used to work as an autonomous flashlight to give easier lighting to miners and contractors and such, in her life back on cybertron. “o-oh yeah i did that…” she replies sheepishly.

megatron: “did you know i used to work in the mines too?”

and nightlight immediately forgets she’s sitting in front of the warlord who obliterated most of their race, who destroyed their planet, and is responsible for the death of many of her friends and comrades, “you did?!” she perks up and moves slightly closer, naturally friendly. the fact that megatron was a miner is kind of common knowledge, but nightlight doesn’t know shit fuck about cybertron’s history or important figures and she just thought megatron was a gladiator before this and that’s it. 

nightlight hasn’t met another ex-miner for a while and she’s visibly excited. most of the other autobots, including her teammates, had other occupations on cybertron, and sometimes she found it hard to relate in certain situations. megatron and nightlight chat nicely for a while, but eventually megatron says something maybe a little too violent that reminds her “ah…i am talking to THE megatron”.

the moped looks down. the warlord questions her expression. “um. well. y'know,” she fidgets, “you guys…i can’t join the decepticons. you guys kinda…you guys do…bad things. sometimes. a lot of bad things.” she is not unsure of this fact, but she does not want the confrontation, so she lightens her choice of words as best she can. megatron leans down again, soft-yelling at her in his typical overly-intense way, “you don’t think the autobots have committed JUST as many grievances as us?”

and the answer is obviously NO, they have NOT committed as many war crimes as you, but nightlight falls for his manipulation and backs off, looking guilty. she’s so awfully gullible. and megatron happily grabs onto this fact and runs with it, naming off bad shit that the autobots have (allegedly) done, and nightlight is successfully freaked out.

the gigantic mech sees he’s scared her and can tell he’s convinced her, so he leans back and ends the interaction, “i’ll give you some time to think, nightlight. we will talk later. tell me your decision then.” and with that, placing his servo once on the table as if to say goodbye like a friend but not quite touch her personal bubble, he walks out. and poor nightlight is left to think, alone, about what she is supposed to do.

megatron exits out of the doors and starscream is there, and they walk off all evil-like and start talking. 

starscream begins their conversation,“well how did it go?”

megatron: “swimmingly.”

starscream: “is she convinced?”

megatron, especially evilly, grinning that nasty shark-smile: “i have left her no other option.”

and DUN DUN DUNNNN it’s somehow revealed that starscream and megatron decided to form a plan to lower autobot morale by stealing away nightlight to become a decepticon. they didn’t come up with it before this, it was impromptu when they got the alert that the girls had entered the ship. not many people defect over, and nightlight, from what they have seen, is a dumbass and is very convincible, so she was the perfect target. her friends, who were admirable fighters and were admittedly putting a dent in their forces, would be especially broken by their friend leaving them for the decepticons, moreso than if they had just killed her. so, they decided to convince her to defect so their morale goes to shit. how satisfying would it be for nightlight not to look at her friends in longing and love, but disdain and hatred when they next meet? she is weak, so if the plan doesn’t work out like they’d hoped, they can just kill her.

eventually, of course, whether she is fully aware she had no other choice or not, she says yes, and she gets her new paint job, her new symbol, her new optic color, and is successfully brainwashed. megatron and co continue their skilled manipulation, and nightlight is forced to make a new life as a decepticon, without her friends. yippee!!

anyways, if you made it here, here’s a little doodle. it’s the differences between her autobot and decepticon look! sorry it’s messy.

thank you for viewing.

EDIT: popcorn is now named “wheelhop”! so i changed all instances of her name.

EDIT2: same with rook phase!

[secret-engima]

Yo! Are you still doing headcanons? Or answers? Whatever! What about others reactions on Starwish being Magnus/Jazz child/sparkmate?? Like, not the one you did for your side fic, but like. Seaspays thoughts when he meets her??? Am I making sense at all???

Hi!! I am still doing HCs and prompts (I’ll get to the Magnus Starwish platonic I swear I’m just- trying to make the muses SIT DOWN in the TF fandom long enough to hammer it out.

Okay so- lemme think. I think I get what you’re asking, you want to know HCs for how specific bots like Seaspray react to learning that she’s Magnus’s child and/or Jazz sparkmate? Lemme see if I do this right.

Seaspray: 

- A lot of things are going wrong when Seaspray meets (or at least sees) Starwish for the first time. Cybertron dying, Whirl going meltdown, slag is hitting the burners and he’s been in the Wreckers for a long enough time to know to brace himself for it to get worse. So when Ultra Magnus asks the Spec Ops mech that showed up out of thin air for the whereabouts of Starwish, Seaspray doesn’t think anything of it. By now, a lot of mechs have heard of Ratchet’s second apprentice, the tiny wonder femme Starwish. Whirl needs a medic, and Starwish is supposedly one of the best. It doesn’t occur to him to wonder how Ultra Magnus knew that Starwish was even in the area.

- Until a little white blur comes out of nowhere to tackle Ultra Magnus anyway. Seaspray and at least half the other Wreckers all brace to help fight off whatever had just gone after their commanding officer, but instead of flinging the attacker away, Ultra Magnus ... holds it close? Her. Holds her close. It’s a little white two-wheeler femme, fearlessly clinging to the Ultra Magnus’s armor like he’s the best thing she’s ever seen rather than a superior officer who threatens to brig people who get overcharged too often. It’s only about halfway through the short conversation that goes on between Ultra Magnus, the femme he’s cradling (cradling!) protectively against his armor, and the faintly bristly First Lieutenant Jazz that Seaspray figures out that 1. this is Starwish and 2. ... something is up. This femme knows these two mechs. Better than a medic to patient relationship allows. That maybe Ultra Magnus’s pet name of Little One is more than just a comment on her size but an endearment to his ... sparkchild?

-Primus below who would sparkmate a mech like him? Check that, since when was Ultra Magnus ever relaxed enough to sparkmate with someone? Seaspray and the rest of the Wreckers had all been of the unanimous opinion that Ultra Magnus had no social life to speak of, let alone a family unit.

-Seaspray is a little too busy trying to wrap his helm around the possibility and the fact that this little femme apparently figured out security codes in a cycle that Seaspray had been trying to hack for vorns to truly preen when she recognizes him as the Wrecker’s pilot. He’s also too busy wondering how in the world someone that tiny and friendly could be related to Ultra Magnus.

-His first clue is the overly innocent helm tilt as she confirms that she is, in fact, Ultra Magnus’s sparkchild and can’t they tell? A question delivered with perfect innocence, but with a faint glint in her optic that Seaspray knew from pranksters everywhere (including himself).

-Then Jazz casually reveals that the little femme is his sparkmate and underneath the spark attack that revelation almost causes, Seaspray goes “Ah. That explains everything.”

-Seaspray has no idea if Starwish is AllSpark forged or created from Ultra Magnus and some unknown sparkmate, but he does know that his commanding officer would be the only mech capable of surviving raising the One of the Autobot First Lieutenant. Seaspray has heard the stories, he knows that Jazz could run circles around the Wreckers if he wanted, no matter what the other Wreckers (and Seaspray) will vocally claim otherwise. Any sparkmate of his had to be at least that cunning and deadly to keep up. She just apparently hides it behind her tiny frame and innocent optics rather than jokes and music and laughter like Jazz.

-The femme trots off to go help Medix with Whirl and the rest are given orders about the ships in the dockyard, but Seaspray has time to exchange a few glances with the others and know that they’re all in agreement. Ultra Magnus had a lot more titanium in his struts than they’d given him credit for if he’d successfully survived raising that.

-And also that they were never going to frag off Ultra Magnus’s sparkchild. Never mind what she would do to them (and Seaspray is sure she could do quite a lot) but facing down the wrath of both their commanding officer and the First Lieutenant?

-Wreckers might be reckless and stupid like other Autobots claim, but none of them were outright suicidal.

Bonus - Jack Darby (Note this will probably become non-canon for AMOSC because it’s too far ahead for my notes, but hey it’s fun to imagine):

-Jack likes to believe he’s pretty adaptable by now. Because- well. Aliens. Giant robot aliens who turn into cars and trucks (and dragons!) living in hiding on Earth, waging a war over resources Jack didn’t know existed? It takes a lot to top that. Plus, for all the Autobots are friendly (most of them anyway), they’re still alien robots and so anything odd or weird about them Jack has learned to kinda just ... chalk up to “Cybertronian things”, move on with his life, and focus on not getting either grounded for life or killed by Decepticons.

-So when he first sees Ultra Magnus and Starwish interacting, Jack really doesn’t think anything of it. Starwish is a lot friendlier than Ratchet, and also a lot smaller, being only around Arcee’s size, and Ultra Magnus is huge. The first time he walks in and sees Starwish perched on Ultra Magnus’s shoulder, he blinks to get over his initial surprise and then just shrugs it off. Starwish is tiny. Ultra Magnus is tall. Ultra Magnus also seems to have a soft spot for her of some sort, so if she needed to climb up his frame to repair something or just to stay out from everyones’ feet, Jack supposes he could see Ultra Magnus accommodating her.

-Then one day he comes in and Ultra Magnus is ... sleeping. Which, okay, long night patrol. Arcee dozes off all the time in the sunshine when she can. The thing that makes him really stare is-

-Starwish is sleeping on top of him. Curled up on his chest plates like an oversized cat on their owner’s chest. Considering the only mech and femme he knows that are that ... cuddly with each other are Arcee and Hardwire and they’re sparkmates...

-Jack grabs Miko before she can screech over the scene and goes to quietly ask Arcee a few questions. Arcee smothers a laugh when Jack asks if Ultra Magnus and Starwish are a Thing (Jack personally thought she acted too young for Magnus but what does he know about alien robot aging) and then explains that Starwish is Magnus’s sparkchild. His daughter.

-Jack really, really never needed to know there was an robot alien version of the Birds and Bees, but if soul marriage is a thing for them then okay. More cybertronians have to get made somehow. Miko asks about who Starwish’s mom was and Arcee hems and haws for a bit before explaining that Ultra Magnus didn’t have a sparkmate and nobody knew who Starwish’s femme creator was. Starwish was ... adopted. Sort of. In a “my soul accepts you as my destined soul child” kind of way. Or something. English was really not up to handling the complexities of explaining an alien culture from space. But at least the adoption thing explains why Ultra Magnus is so much more massive than his adult daughter (unless of course height of the parents had no affect on the heights of the kids in cybertronian biology because they were- well- mechanical. Did they even have genetics to worry about passing on?).

-Honestly after that near-fiasco and brain melt, catching Jazz and Starwish kissing in the hall was nothing. Jazz had been a steady presence since before Starwish ever arrived on planet. Jack knows the quirky spy mech and frankly a vaguely sarcastic ninja medic is exactly the kind of femme Jack can see him going for.

-At least until Miko asks how they “married” and it comes out that Starwish bonded (married? is that really the best equivalent when it meant sharing part of your soul energy?) to Jazz on the battlefield in order to save his life after he got critically injured in the fighting. Miko and Raf think it’s the most romantic thing they’ve ever heard. Jack is a little too busy hearing the voice in his head that sounds a lot like his mom going off about “contaminants” and “danger” and “safety first” (or maybe that’s just Ratchet muttering away in his work station as the story gets told, that mech knows how to hold a grudge over his patients doing stupid things)

[hoodoo12]

Submerged

I received this ask: “Would you be so inclined to write about a Rick with tentacles, but this time it's because he's a type of sea monster. Would be better if it includes your bartender”. And truly, how could I not?

NSFW, Sea Monster Rick/reader, tentacles, deep sea biological stuff, wonky science, this isn’t an attractive Rick

⁂

“No kids!” the bouncer roared over the noise of the patrons.

It’d been loud enough that the bar quieted down for a second, and en mass everyone looked towards the door.

The reply to the order was too soft to hear. You strained, but were unsuccessful in understanding any response to the directive. Peering through the crowd, however, you could see a boy wearing jeans and a yellow shirt, and what looked to be a fish bowl over his head. Before you could scrutinize him further, however, the bouncer shoved him back out the door and slammed it shut.

He glared at the door as if expecting the kid to try coming back in, but he didn’t, and gradually the commotion of the place picked up again. You went back to pulling taps.

After last call, you asked your co-worker about the boy.

“He was a weird-lookin’ Morty,” the bouncer told you. “Fish like, kinda. You know, had gills and webbed hands and stuff. Scaly.”

“And there wasn’t a Rick with him?” you pressed.

The bouncer gave you a long-suffering look. “Sweetheart, you know as well as me that no Rick is gonna turn down the chance to get inta this bar. It’s got a reputation, thanks ta you.”

Okay, so maybe you hadn’t been keeping your little extracurricular activities on the down low as much as you thought. It wasn’t your fault Ricks couldn’t keep their mouths shut, or that the members of both the SEAL Team and Council of Ricks weren’t the most inconspicuous people around!

Still, it didn’t bother you too much, and as much as they ragged on you, the rest of the staff liked the tips they earned.

You finished cleaning your area, helped wipe down and set the chairs on the tables so the early crew could do a final sweep, and headed out the front door. You locked it behind you.

Turning around and fumbling for your keys, you almost bumped into the Morty standing right behind you.

“Jesus fuck!” you cried, startled.

He flinched, as Mortys are wont to do. It was the same Morty who’d tried to sneak into the Bar, and the bouncer’s description was right: the kid was piscine. Tiny scales gave his arms a slight silvery sheen. He was wearing some type of water filled bowl over his head; you could see bubbles circulating through the liquid so his Rick must have designed this respirator for him. He had just a suggestion of a nose, and periodically gills opened to show the filaments and lamellae in the sides of his neck.

“S-s-sorry,” he stuttered. His voice was muffled and a little tinny, from the microphone apparatus built into his headgear.

You tried to catch your breath after the adrenaline rush. “You scared me!”

The kid hung his head as best he could wearing a fish bowl. One arm clutched the opposite elbow in a classic demonstration of embarrassment.

“It isn’t you,” you hastened to explain. “I just wasn’t expecting you to be standing here, waiting for me.”

He considered this: that you weren’t scared of his appearance, just that he’d walked up to you without you knowing. He seemed to accept this, and looked more at ease as he nodded.

“I, uh, I have a . . . well, a message, I guess? From R-r-rick? He wanted to know if you’d visit him?”

Every sentence lilted upward like a question.

Morty continued, his voice also ratcheting higher with perceived rejection. “So, yeah, he-he gave me this n-note to give to you? If that’s okay, if you want it . . .”

Although it ran through your head that your rule was not to go to any Rick’s place, this was a weird situation and you took the damp piece of paper the kid offered. He passed it over meekly. You didn’t miss that his hands were webbed, as you’d been told, nor that the nails at the tips of his fingers were needle-like spikes. He could do some real damage with those if he was so inclined.

Carefully opening it--it was folded and the paper stuck together on itself--it didn’t tell you more than what Morty had already said. It was from a Rick, and he would be interested in meeting you.

You could read between the lines as to why.

Morty shifted on his feet. It dawned on you that he looked unsteady, and wondered if he was more comfortable in water than on dry land.

“Rick said, he said that this was a special chip,” Morty piped up, holding out what looked like a gold coin in the scaled palm of his hand. “I have one too. It takes you from one place, and then-then back to where you came from.”

You stared at the device for a moment.

“Are you going to take it?”

You didn’t go to Ricks. They came to you. That’d been your one main rule since the start. You had never seen this Morty before; you knew nothing about this Rick. You should turn it down. You had no idea where this was going to take you--

Throwing caution to the wind, you gently picked the coin out of Morty’s hand. He didn’t smile or frown or give any reaction to your choice.

“Are you coming too?” you asked him.

He shook his head, making the liquid inside his bowl slosh. “I-I-I don’t get to n-new places much. I’m just going to stay here for a little bit.”

“The Bar’s closed. No one will be back for ten hours, and there’s a security system that’s armed,” you cautioned him.

“I’m just going to sit here and look at the sky,” he replied.

You glanced up when he did, taking in the galaxy around you. You supposed it was pretty, if you didn’t see it nearly every day. But it begged the question: why would that be so interesting to a Morty? Didn’t his Rick do space travel?

“Okay,” you reluctantly agreed. “Don’t go too near the edge of the rock. The anti-grav dome extends over it, but you shouldn’t get too close.”

Morty nodded absently and began to wander away. His gait was more shuffling than steps, and it made you wonder again about where he spent most of his time.

Taking a breath, you secure your belongings and pressed the chip. A portal opened up, and you stepped through.

⁂

You walked onto a rocky beach on an unknown plane. The ocean in front of you stretched for miles around you; disappearing into the horizon as far as you could see, until it was difficult to determine what was water and what was sky. There were two suns overhead. The larger of the two was setting. The other, either smaller or farther away, was still high in the sky.

When you turned to look behind you, you realized that you were on a small island. It was so miniscule it would only take you a minute or two to reach the opposite beach. Scrub grasses were the only vegetation, and the only life you could see were tiny crab-like creatures scuttling about and hiding between the rocks.

It was a peaceful but desolate place.

A little wind ruffled your hair. Luckily it was warm--probably thanks to the large sun that would bake this place if it was high noon--because you were only wearing a tank top and jeans. The sun had dipped further under the horizon,  but it was so large it still filled a third of the sky. You didn’t know if it was setting faster than you were used to, or if somehow you’d been here longer than you remembered. The smell of salt water was pleasant and familiar, like the times you’d visited a beach on Earth.

You hugged yourself and turned in a circle, wondering what you were supposed to do now.

“You came,” a gravelly voice, a Rick voice, said behind you.

Spinning around, you were met by the sight of a Rick waist deep in the water. His hair was the customary blue, but flat from the water and woven with tiny strands of seaweed. He skin looked scaled, like his Morty had been, but he also had spiked fins running from wrist to elbow. He wore no shirt or pants that you could see, but the water was slate grey and provided no visibility below the surface.

“Yeah,” you agreed. “Your Morty waited until the Bar closed for me.”

You watched gills open and close on the sides of his neck, under his jaw. What startled you more was seeing his eyelids across his eyes, instead of up and down, when he blinked.

“You don’t need the . . . apparatus that Morty was wearing?” you asked, for want of something to say.

“Do you really want to talk about Morty?” Rick countered drily. “I assume you know why I asked you here.”

You blinked. Yes, of course you knew. The casual expectation of it, although not unheard of from Ricks and not even remotely the crudest way you’d heard it put, wasn’t what threw you a little off. It was the fact that you’d agreed to come here in the first place, to who-knows-where, and found yourself stranded on a spit of land in the middle of an endless ocean.

Then it occurred to you that you did have a way out; you had the portal chip still in your hand.

“I’m not exactly the same as Morty,” Rick continued, in your silence. He seemed to understand that you were questioning your decision, and was making nice. “We share some of the same traits--”

He gestured vaguely to himself; you noted his nails were the same needles at their tips you’d seen on the boy.

“--but we’re not cut from exactly the same cloth. He needed a little extra help breathing on that dry rock the Bar sits on, but I wouldn’t be able to make it there easily myself. You’re familiar with the central finite curve of Ricks? I fall further out on the curve.”

You nodded and shrugged a little.

He didn’t seem exasperated that you didn’t understand.

More questions flitted through your head, however. Not about the curve of Ricks, whatever that was. It sounded too technical for you. But how did he know about the Bar? How had he heard about you? There was nothing on this rock, did he live here? Did he live underwater? That would make the most sense, with his fins and gills--

“Will you join me?” Rick asked, holding his hand, palm raised, to you.

“You’re not coming up here?”

He chuckled. “No. I’m not built for being on land.”

Was he a mermaid? Merman? Did he have a fish tail under the water that you couldn’t see?

You didn’t ask those questions. Instead, you tell him quietly, “I can’t swim well. This water seems pretty calm, but I’m just not very good at it . . .”

Rick chuckled again, this time at your worry. He must have been pleased you had stuck around this long and didn’t directly turn him down. “Stay here a moment,” he told you, and without waiting for your answer, sunk beneath the water.

The sun too, continued to sink. The smaller of the two was still high overhead, but must not provide this planet with much light. It was dimmer now, a soft twilight. You sat on the beach and waited, shaking off the little crab-creatures when they got curious and tried to climb your legs. In a short while, Rick resurfaced near where he’d been before.

“Here,” he told you, and tossed something at you.

Automatically you tried to catch it, juggled it because it was slimy, and dropped it. Picking it up gingerly, you almost squealed when you realized it was some unknown sea creature. Its body was gelatinous and nearly clear. Long strands hung limply from part of it, dangling out of your hand, and it moved weakly. It took you a lot of willpower not to drop the thing again.

“Eat it,” Rick advised.

“What is . . . it?” you asked instead. If you looked at it closely, you were pretty sure you could see internal organs.

“Is that what’s important here? Just swallow it, and you won’t drown.”

You weren’t sure if that convinced you. You glanced up at Rick, who was still waist deep in the water. Some of the crab-things were extremely interested in the blob in your hand, and doubled their efforts to climb your legs.

“Listen, baby, it won’t hurt you.”

The easy confidence and self-assuredness sounded more Rick-like than almost anything else he’d said so far.

He continued, “It’s what I eat so I can be waiting here, out of the water for you. It’s an interesting little beast. It has some properties that alter you enough so you can breathe out of your natural element. I can breathe dry air, you’ll be able to breathe in water. I don’t know why something like that would evolve. I makes me wonder, sometimes . . .”

His voice drifted away as he turned his attention to the sky, as if contemplating more about the creation of the universe than any other Rick you’d ever met.

It was on the tip of your tongue to ask him about that, but was a philosophical discussion what you were here for? Instead, you said, “Properties . . .?”

Rick fixed you with the same caustic expression he’d had when you’d attempted to make small talk by broaching the subject of him not needing mechanical assistance, like his Morty.

“I’m sorry! I just . . . it’s weird, is all. This is all brand new--I don’t really come to Ricks, they come to me, and this is a Waterworld planet, and, and--”

A hint of a smile flitted across his face at your babbling like this was the first time you’d met Rick Sanchez. You got the impression that his teeth were sharp, like a shark’s.

“Then I’m honored,” he said, and moved smoothly in the water, slightly closer towards the beach. “So trust me a little more . . .”

You examined the dying, jelly-like creature in your hand. Then you decided that looking at it too long was probably not in your best interest. You’d done a lot of things with a lot of Ricks, and they had all turned out okay. You didn’t consider yourself a daredevil, but with your lifestyle you supposed you were. Here was simply another leap of faith. With a silent prayer and while holding your breath, you quickly shoved it into your mouth and attempted to swallow it whole.

It was pure salt. That, plus the fact it hit the back of your throat while some of the long tentacles hung from your lips made you retch. With herculean effort, you swallowed and swallowed and managed to choke the the thing down. Your eyes watered and you imagined you could feel it sliding down into your stomach unpleasantly.

You waited a moment to make sure it was going to stay down. You didn’t feel any different.

“Join me?” Rick asked again. “The water’s fine.”

A giggle escaped you, despite the bad and obvious pick up line. He waited with an outstretched hand, and you pushed yourself up off the rocks on the beach. You took a step towards him.

“Sans clothing,” he told you with another faint smile and cock of his eyebrow.. “You won’t need them . . .”

Quickly, you stripped. You’d been scrutinized by a multitude of different Ricks while taking off your clothing before, so it didn’t bother you. You made sure the portal chip was secure in a pocket, folded your pants and shirt into messy piles and left them on your shoes, then shucked your bra and stepped out of your panties. Your undergarments went on top of the pile.

The rocks under your feet were smooth and held warmth from the sun. You carefully stepped into the shallows where the water met the land, and the opaque water was warm as well.

Rick was several feet from shore. You expected to be able to walk to him; he was only waist deep, after all, but after only one step closer to him, with only your ankles covered, the water around him and between the two of you erupted. Something moved sinuously just under the surface, making the water roll and slosh, and turning it frothy. It looked like eels, or whatever passed as eels on this alien planet.

You almost jumped back onto the beach.

“There’s a drop off, baby. But don’t worry, I’ll catch you,” Rick told you.

You’d already stepped through an unknown portal, eaten an animal he wouldn’t even tell you the name of, and stood naked in front of him. You’d already proven you trusted him, or that you had lost all sanity.

The underwater thrashing didn’t stop. You took a breath, which oddly hurt your chest, and waded in further.

He hadn’t been lying about the drop off. One second your feet were on the rocks; the next, you were floundering because there was no support under you at all. You almost went into your neck, but an unknown number of strong arms . . . tentacles? . . . grabbed you and held you up out of the water. Although some wrapped securely around you, others nudged at you, exploring your skin.

With no direction from you, they moved you closer to Rick.

He held out a taloned hand, which you took carefully, and the felt but unseen arms lifted you to his torso. Now you could see that what held you were tentacles: blackish, constantly moving tentacles, and they were his. His lower half was a mass of them. Some, like the ones wrapped around you, were smooth and lithe. Others, slightly hidden between the ones supporting you, were smaller, thinner, and seemed to be more sensitive because they were the ones nosing about you, as if gathering information. They had something that looked like the suckers you would see on an octopus running along their underside. Spreading further out in the water like a cloak were a completely different type of tentacle: barbed, spiked, and dangerous looking. They didn’t move like the others did; they floated lazily and did not come near you.

“Hi baby,” Rick purred. Now that you were closer, his voice had a faint gurgling quality to it that you’d never heard from a Rick before.

You took all this in, smiled, and opened your mouth to answer him. At the intake of air needed to speak, however, you gulped. Your chest burned, and automatically your free hand went to your throat.

“Let’s get you underwater, okay?”

You wanted to tell him no, wait, give me a second, but he wrapped his arms around you, keeping you close to his chest--his body was cold!--and sank beneath the water. Your instinct was to struggle. You pushed against him, your body telling you to keep your head above the water, it was dangerous, don’t do it--

--you made a mighty attempt to get one last lungful of air before he pulled you under the surface.

Rick didn’t react to your struggling. He fell deeper in, his hair becoming loose and free in its natural environment. He stroked your head and almost seemed sympathetic to your panic, but he didn’t let you go.

You fought against opening your mouth in the water as long as you were able, but with your lungs on fire for want of oxygen, you finally had no choice. You gasped, and salt water flooded you. It sent you into a greater panic, gagging, sending countless bubbles of precious air racing to the surface of the water far above you, but Rick’s tentacles and arms held you tightly and in a moment, you’d lost the fight against your instinct. You took a breath. Found the air your lungs demanded. In a few moments you’d gained some equilibrium and your brain didn’t tell you you were dying. Bubbles rose from you again as you exhaled.

Carefully, you breathed in again, and discovered the taste of salt was gone, and you were fine. It took a few more seconds to truly believe you were breathing normally underwater. The weightlessness of the medium was a new sensation too, and it was pleasant.

You managed to smile at Rick, and he grinned back, showcasing his triangular teeth.

“Okay, baby?” he asked, bubbles rising from his mouth too.

You had no idea how you could hear him speak so clearly underwater, but like so much else tonight, you didn’t question it.

Rick let you explore this new environment a little. Without fins or webbed appendages you were clumsy and slow, but you swam as best you knew how. Based on what you had seen of the surface, you expected not to have much visibility, but the water was surprisingly clear. You could see unknown fishes dart passed you in silvery schools, but most were too quick to be examined closely and stayed far away from you both. There were fronds of plants rooted into the bottom of the sea below you.

It was disorienting have total freedom of movement without gravity trying to constantly reclaim you, but you got used to it quickly.

Rick kept easy pace with you. When he didn’t touch you at all--which was rare; his hand was either on your back or one of his tentacles reached out to wind around a limb--you saw he was long and lean, like all the Ricks you’d met, but any similarity dissolved at his waist. The mass of tentacles that made up his lower half was uncountable. They were in constant movement, testing the water or touching your skin, unless he was moving more quickly. Then he became more streamlined, all smooth, each tentacle held tightly together as one appendage.

It made you laugh to see him swim so effortlessly. He was mildly amused at your laughter, and zipped around you several times. You wondered if he’d ever had an audience to show off for, to flaunt his superiority. He may live underwater, he may be part--or mostly--fish, but he was a Rick, and that need ran deep.

So did his libido. His tentacles slipped more than once along your inner thighs to explore your pussy, or to circle your nipples and stimulate them to hardness. None of those touches lingered, at first. They grew bolder as you became more comfortable.

When you floated so you could see the surface of the water above you and watched wobbly bubbles of air drift upward to burst when they met the air, Rick swam above you, blocking your view. His body may have still been cold, pressed to yours, but you didn’t register it any longer. You and he both made an effort to keep the wicked spines on his defense tentacles far away from your skin.

He kissed you, and it wasn’t as odd as you expected. Your hands weaved into his hair and he copied you, his long fingernails gently pushing through your hair as well to keep you close. You were careful of his teeth. His tongue, like all Rick’s, was demanding. It was also thin and slightly bristled. It made you wonder, in a brief second of panic, what his cock would be like, but after a few moments of kissing the mass of tentacles swarmed you, enveloped you, and it didn’t matter.

Caught and supported in the nest of constantly roaming arms, you had even less worry about your ineptness in the water. Although you could feel the strength in them--some were as thick as your legs--each one was gentle and didn’t wrap too tightly around you or pull too hard.

It was like a hundred different hands and tongues on you all at once, and you laughed and gasped and cried out.

They delved between your legs, stimulating all the nerve endings along your pussy. Others continued to play with your nipples, and when Rick dropped his head and licked them with the soft bristles on his tongue and nipped at them with those serrated teeth of his, your back arched with the pleasure of it. You wrapped your arms around his head to keep him close and he nibbled at one, then the other until each felt like you were on fire, and arousal spread throughout your body.

You were tentative, at first, touching his tentacles, focusing your attention to his arms and chest. But occasionally you would brush against part of his lower body. He liked it; even your timid, feather-light touches made him gasp softly, so it wasn’t long before you stroked them, or wrapped your hand around the thinner ones and pulled. There were slight color changes in his skin that trailed behind the touch of your hand.

That fascinated you, and you rubbed him faster, or slower, or with more or less pressure just to see the varying colorful mottling that he didn’t seem to have voluntary control over. 

Rick let you play. You weren’t sure if he had lungs, but he opened his mouth in a parody of needing air, and moaned. His head would drop back. The stimulation made him arch his back occasionally too, just as you had, with the pleasure.

When you happened to notice he had a row of spikes that ran along his spine that rose as you ran your hands on him, you also dared to stroke the largest of his tentacles: the ones that were adorned with their own threatening spikes. You used your fingertips to carefully caress him, making sure to go with them instead of against their orientation.

That made every spike on his body flare, and Rick cried out sharply. You were immediately crushed to him, every soft tentacle wrapped around you, holding you close. You gasped too; his immediate aroused reaction to your touch was exhilarating to you as well.

“I w-want to-to fuck you,” he growled, before his mouth captured yours again forcefully.

You laughed at his urgency and gasped at his insistence. The tentacles were everywhere, still, but conveyed more eagerness and need.

You carefully slipped a hand through the mass, to where his groin would be if he were a land creature. That made him pull back from your mouth for a moment, watching your face.

What you felt but didn't see was completely foreign to you. It was slick there, and there was some constant compression around your hand from the tentacles. Your fingers bumped into something longer and tubular, which made Rick half close his eyes and hiss at the sensation, but if that was his cock it was also rough and barbed. It didn't cause pain in your palm, per se, but it did make you itch.

Your hand released whatever that was, quickly. Rick chuckled at your reaction.

You licked your lips and attempted  to keep a neutral expression on your face. “Is that . . . uhm. Is it your . . .?”

You weren’t sure how finish that question without being insulting. Frankly, it worried you.

Luckily, Rick was only amused by your discovery and subsequent concern.

“Yes,” he answered your unfinished query. He dropped his mouth back to your neck, under your ear and nibbled the sensitive skin there. He felt you swallow at the admission, and made you fret a little longer for his own amusement before assuring you, murmuring against your neck, “I don't expect to fuck you in a traditional way, baby. There are other things we can do.

“Unless, of course, you’d like to try . . .”

Your hand still itched in irritation. You could only imagine what his cock would do to the more sensitive skin of your pussy.

Hoping you weren’t going to make him mad, you told him you’d prefer to try the non-traditional method.

He chuckled again, kissed you hard on the mouth, and agreed. He told you, however, that it meant you wouldn't get the attention from all his tentacles; he may need one to jerk himself off with.

You agreed, and stroked the largest of his tentacles again coquettishly.

That made him shudder in pleasure, and the water eddied around you as he finally let them truly start to pleasure you.

Two wrapped around your left leg, and several caught your right. They spread your thighs, and the tip of another dipped just inside your cunt. The feeling sent electricity through you. It didn’t enter you fully, however; it just teased. Several more of the smaller tentacles joined it, caressing you as they explored your folds. The suckers on them tickled and stimulated you simultaneously, making you writhe in the nest of tentacles supporting you.

Rick hadn’t stopped nuzzling your neck, but at one point groaned how you good tasted. At first you thought he meant your throat. Then you realized he was receiving a lot of information from his lower half; it was another odd thing to consider, him being able to taste you without using his mouth, but that quickly went to the back of your mind as he continued.

One of the suckers latched onto your clit and your back arched in response. The thicker tentacle that had been teasing you by only shallowly dipping inside thrust forward, finally. It filled you just as a cock would, long and full. Bubbles burst from your mouth, rising erratically towards the surface as you cried out.

You felt Rick’s mouth widen to a grin at your reaction. Although you were kept securely close to him by a throng of tentacles not actively involved in touching you, one of his arms wrapped around you and the other drew its nails down your side. That was ticklish and you squirmed; that only served to make him do it again. 

When you managed to open your eyes, you were startled to see a slightly predatory glint in his, watching you intently. You batted his hand away from you, which made some of the tentacles near that arm jerk back, and it seemed to dawn on him why. He withdrew his hand but smirked at the same time. You pinched him in mock retaliation, and the smirk became a grin as he kissed you again.

The sucker that had attached itself to your clit was gentle but insistent, and provided a constant stimulation. The tentacle inside you didn’t thrust as you’d expected a cock to do, and you mewled in disappointment. You didn’t realize you needed friction so much; your hips thrust against him automatically as best they could being restrained. Your efforts didn’t result in much. He was too strong, you were wrapped up and caught in the web of him too tightly to do more than wiggle ineffectively against him.

Rick’s face took on that wolfish cast again, and it flashed through your mind that his prey had probably been captured just as you were right now: held closely to him so he could bite, and spread out to minimize thrashing before he tore them apart. Maybe he even told them how good they tasted, before he devoured them!

It was scary. But you doubted any of the creatures he ensnared and ate were actively being penetrated by him, or continuing to stroke his tentacles, so instead of truly struggling to get away as part of your mind was insisting, you took a breath and slipped one hand carefully around the back of his neck, mindful of the spikes, to pull his face closer to yours. 

“Fuck me, Rick!” you muttered into his mouth, before dipping your tongue between his lips.

You felt him grin against you, and that tentacle inside you began moving just how your body so desperately wanted.

As he thrust, he also loosened his hold on you so you could rut against him in return. The multiple sensations--your legs held firmly but gently, being filled, your clit constantly being squeezed, the writhing bed of supporting you, plus the relative weightlessness of being underwater--all merged into an overall new, full phenomenon.

You had no sense of up or down. You were lost in the bliss of being completely surrounded and filled by Rick. There were no pressure points on any part of your body, there was no gravity to orient you. You floated, you drifted; the pleasure he wrung from you came in waves, just like the ocean around you. You were a land creature, only a visitor to this environment, but this was intoxicating.

You tried to continue stroking him as well, as best you could while being overcome with impending release. Rick seemed to continue to like it; his tentacles rose to your hand and tips of the free ones curled through your fingers. The movement of the one inside you increased too, in response to what you did, but that was counterproductive because it was difficult to concentrate with the pleasure mounting in your cunt.

The moans and gasps both of you created melted together.

Wanting to tell him to slow down, wait a moment, please Rick, you managed to open your eyes once again.

The water around you was darker. You didn’t know if the sun had finally set completely, or if you’d both sunk into deeper water, but silvery-blue dots and stripes had broken out along Rick’s tentacles, and up the outsides of his arms, near the spiked fins.

The unexpected beauty of it--of him--made you gasp.

It drew you away from the pleasure in your groin for a moment. You made an effort to pull one of his tentacles, and watched the bioluminescence follow your hand, just as the mottling color had. You laughed. You stroked him in different places to watch the light show, poked him to leave a spot, and found that lighter touches created a more warm, yellow-ish glow than more firm strokes.

Rick reveled in your caresses. His lower half twisted and each appendage vied for your attention, minus the ones devoted specifically for you. He never released you either, although now you were passed gently from one supportive arm to another in an never-ending motion that rocked you.

Tumbling through the water, locked in a mutual embrace and in mutual pleasure, you both pressed together and cried out. Rick didn’t need to keep a tight hold on you any longer; you actively clung to him as you neared your peak. He knew it too; not only weren’t you able to caress him, but your voice hitched higher, and your pussy tightened around him.

One of your arms hooked around his head, burying his face in the side of your neck again. Out of the water, in a bed or any place else, he’d have had a difficult time breathing, but his gills allowed him to be held in the awkward position without complaint. In fact, he pressed in closer, taking a healthy bite of your skin between his dangerous teeth, and shaking his head slightly.

If you’d been less on the cusp of orgasm you’d have panicked. As it was, however, with his tentacle penetrating you and another applying the most specific pressure you’d ever felt on your clit, you simply couldn’t think of the possible implication behind this gesture.

And when he growled, “Come for me, baby--that’s right, come for me--” just like so many other Ricks, you succumbed to the pleasure. You were conditioned for it.

You came hard, arching against him, every muscle taut, crying out his name.

It seemed to last forever. Bliss radiated through your body, making you tremble as it began to ebb away. There was still a tentacle deep inside you but you had to pry the one on your clit away; it was too much.

Rick didn’t protest however, because you now realized he was stroking himself. He never released you, but multiple thinner tentacles curled up underneath him, where you’d felt his cock. Sudden guilt rushed you; had he been doing that to himself all along and you were so selfishly wallowing in your own pleasure you didn’t know it?

Your hand took one of the tentacles that had moved to his most intimate area.

“Can I see?” you asked, breathlessly.

The request seemed to surprise him. But after a moment’s consideration, Rick held you securely and swam upward, closer to the surface of the water again. Most of his bioluminescence faded as you entered less dark water. Once there, he turned so you were above him and shifted you downward along his body so you weren’t face to face any longer. The tentacle that had stayed in your cunt slipped out, and you moaned at the loss. It fondled your pussy moment more, sliding through your folds, before it stretched upward to Rick’s mouth. He sucked at it; you saw his tongue lapping the flavor of you off himself. It was erotic, and if you hadn’t been exquisitely tender between your legs you would have fingered yourself.

When he finished cleaning himself of your taste, he situated you where he wanted you to be. You’d be in the perfect position to give him a blowjob, if the two of you were more traditionally sexually compatible. Then he spread himself and you had the perfect view to watch him stroke along his shaft.

Nothing had been conventional tonight, and this was no different. He didn’t use any upward pulls on his cock at all, due to the barbs. Instead, a tentacle stroked down, from tip to base. Each was immediately followed by another, in a never ending cycle that quickened as you watched. You glanced up at him, like you would have if you were sucking him off; Rick had his teeth bared and his gills flared and shut more rapidly as he drew closer to his own orgasm.

You took your eyes off his for a second, just long enough to wrap your own hand around his cock, and copy the motion of his tentacles. The itching irritation you’d experienced earlier wasn’t quite as bad as it had been.

He cried out at your touch, throwing his head back at the pleasure.

Being completely supported and with both hands free, you took up the activity. You couldn’t move as quickly as his own tentacles did, and you weren’t as smooth because the motion was slightly awkward and the opposite of anything you’d done before, but that didn’t seem to make a difference to him.

Now he trembled and arched and the silver dots and stripes erupted along his body again, involuntarily. Points of light, although much fainter than on his tentacles, became visible on his torso too. One of his hands threaded through your hair and held your head tightly. He locked eyes with you and as you added a slight twist to the movement your hand made, he roared as he came.

His semen was more viscous than the water, with the faintest hint of shimmer to it. It floated away cohesively from his body, in the area between him and you, and without thinking, you opened your mouth and caught some on your tongue.

His fingers spasmed in your hair and you glanced up at him again.

“Th-that was fucking hot,” he croaked.

You couldn’t repeat it; it dispersed too widely into the water. But you did risk injury by giving him a quick swipe of your tongue to the tip of his cock, licking away a bead of residual ejaculate that clung there.

Rick jerked at the touch and you were gathered up in his tentacles again, holding you, nudging you, each of them seeming to attempt to touch or caress you in some way. He kissed you again, and as you rested on his chest for a bit you both floated gently in the tide together.

Eventually, though, you felt him actively swimming again. You held onto him and let him do the work, and soon your heads broke the surface of the water.

The tiny island was nearby. Although the large sun was now only a sliver along the horizon, the secondary sun still cast its cool light. There were no stars visible in the sky; it dawned on you why Morty might have wanted to see all the constellations and galaxies you considered so commonplace you didn’t notice them any longer.

“The effects of the jellyfish should be almost gone,” Rick told you.

You’d forgotten. It had become so natural to breathe underwater that when you coughed and brought liquid out of your lungs, it was a surprise. As if a dam had broken, you were suddenly wracked with a coughing fit. You hacked more and more fluid up. Rick supported you and soothed you with meaningless words as it happened.

When you were finally able to pull in a lungful of dry air and it didn’t hurt, he lifted you as effortlessly as when you were submerged to the land again. You must look a mess: shivering, with your hair dripping and lanky from being underwater, but Rick smiled up at you.

Standing as far into the ocean as you could before the drop off, you reached for him one last time. He stretched upward and forward, and you were able to embrace him again, and kiss him. Although you hadn’t noticed it when you were in his element, now he tasted like salt.

His grin broke the kiss.

“Thank you,” he said.

Like so many other things tonight, a Rick expressing gratitude was uncommon. You cupped his cheek. He took that hand and sunk beneath the waves until your fingertips were the only thing touching, then he was gone.

You watched where he’d gone for a moment, then made your way back to the pile of your clothing. You shook out the crab-creatures that’d hidden in the folds, and began pulling on your clothes, Your skin was tacky from the saltwater, and you were coated in a thin veneer of slick mucus you hadn’t known about before. It wasn’t unpleasant, and you realized it must have been residual from his tentacles.

Shrugging, you grappled yourself back into your clothes and dug the portal chip out of your pocket. You looked to see if he’d made a return appearance, but when you saw he hadn’t, you depressed the chip, and stepped through the resulting doorway of greens and yellows, back to the dry rock you’d come from.

fin.  

[entropic-introspection]

Part the third! I feel like its a sort of. Odd part, because its when suddenly there’s plot and me attempting to start explaining the whole nonsense with Cybertronian submissive/dominant coding, but hey! It’s done!

And for those of you who don’t like reading this on tumblr- eventually, a cleaned up version will be uploaded to AO3. I’ll post a link when it happens! For now though, this is titled I Love You for Psychological Reasons, abbreviated ily4pr because that is. An astonishingly accurate acronym actually.

So, what is the Autobot high command like? SNAFU, honestly.

“Ow! Ratchet, are you sure this is necessary?” Optimus asked, trying to squirm away. He received an especially fierce jab with the welder for his troubles.

“Maybe if someone didn’t run off like a partially plated sparkling, no,” Ratchet said. “Quit squirming or I’ll weld your arm to your chassis by accident.”

“Accident,” Optimus muttered. “Right.”

Ratchet cracked the barest hint of a smile that he let seep into his field, but kept his eyes on his work. “Don’t you two have anything better to do?” he called over his shoulder at the annoying buzz of conjoined fields behind him.

Jetfire and Jetstorm looked at each other. “No?” they said in unison.

“We be taking Prime to see Ultra Magnus and maybe sort of Magnus Sentinel after this!” Jetstorm said. “So until then, we be waiting.”

“Prime’s a big bot, I’m sure he can make his own way there,” Ratchet said sardonically.

“Sentinel maybe Magnus gave us specific orders!” Jetfire said. “He be wanting us to be ready to drag you in by your unecessary wingtips to be explaining this mess to the Ultra Magnus. Though those be missing right now.”

Ratchet could feel the tiny twitches in Optimus’ plating, cables suddenly tensing and trying to recalibrate for a missing weight. His processor was probably stuck on a loop, looking for his jetpack and its associated protocols plus its weight. Not uncommon for an injury like that, but it could be a sign of further damage. He’d keep an eye on it.

“I thought he wasn’t supposed to get too much unexpected news,” Optimus said.

Jetfire and Jetstorm gave Optimus pitying looks. “You thinking he miss whole planet shaking from huge warp? Or missing hammer? Sir tell us he be telling Ultra Magnus just so he not worry so much!” Jetstorm explained.

“And conveniently means he can’t explain what all he’s mucked up or else it might be too much for that poor old spark,” Ratchet muttered cynically, too low for the twins to hear. Optimus glared at him, but made no other movements. Smart bot. Most of the Academy bots learned pretty quick that the one person you never argue with was your medic, but Ratchet’s heard a few stories to suggest that Sentinel definitely-not-Magnus took a few tries to get it through his thick helm. That threat to weld arms to chassis wasn’t uncommon, nor was it entirely un-acted on. With a few adjustments, of course. Such as possibly welding a big mouth shut.

“All right,” Optimus said. “Can you tell Sentinel I’ll be there shortly? I’ll bring the hammer as well.”

Ratchet frowned. Optimus would be tired from both the battle and the repairs, not to mention a full submissive shouldering their way through a full dominance challenge could bring its own problems. If he had his way, Optimus would be resting for the day, alone or with friends as he preferred.

(Some part of him rolls its optics at his use of the word day, but, well, Earth had affected all of them. He feels awful to even think it, but he’s glad that Optimus ended up stuck with their horrible little rag-tag team of misfits on Earth, because the thought of him going through the rest of the Autobot Guard training alone-)

“I’ll come with you,” Ratchet said instead.

Optimus cycled his optics. “What? Why? I thought you said-”

Ratchet waved him off sharply. “I just fixed you up, and that hammer is slagging heavy. I don’t want your whole arm falling off because you were careless.”

Jetfire and Jetstorm frowned. “Is not being a good idea,” Jetfire said. “Too many bots! Without security clearance, even!”

Ratchet snorted. “If I wanted our Magnus dead, I could’ve just let Shockwave finish him off, and if I wanted the hammer, I had plenty of time to make off with it.”

The twins drew themselves up and approached together. “Still not allowed,” Jetstorm said. “No good!” Jetfire said. They both glared at Ratchet, their fields shoving their assorted bits of dominance at the both of them. Young bots, honestly. Medics didn’t give a slag about dominance and submission because that’s stupid when you’re saving lives, and Optimus hadn’t even stuttered at dominance challenges much stronger than whatever these two could dredge up. Still not good for them to get ideas.

Ratchet raised an eye ridge as he put his welder down and turned around, and neatly swatted them down with a burst of sharp edged medical grade dominant EMF. “Don’t get into a code off with a medic,” he drawled as the twins flinched backwards. “It doesn’t tend to impress us much.”

“Just… go ahead,” Optimus said to them. “I’ll convince Ratchet, or take responsibility.”

“I’m my own responsibilty,” Ratchet growled, but the twins had already fled. He looked over at Optimus. “You ok, kid? Can’t be fun dealing with any of this on top of a full challenge from that slag eating idiot Megatron.” Primus knew he’d have a raging helmache after that, even with a lower sensing capacity.

“I’m fine, Ratchet,” Optimus said. “I’m just… out of practice.”

“Heh. Earth was a lot quieter, wasn’t it,” Ratchet said.

“I recall there being a few Decepticons,” Optimus said with a smile.

“Details,” Ratchet said dismissively. “At least we weren’t socializing with them.”

Optimus stifled a laugh as Ratchet stretched, working out the kinks in his back cables. He relaxed his field as well, dropping the medical coding that let him project whatever was needed to calm patients. A vague neutral was the most popular, but he could vary it towards either dominance or submission as needed. It was supposedly indistinguishable from a natural EMF, but there was always something off about it. Made bots jumpy, and feeling others constantly probing his EMF without thinking to find that wrongness made Ratchet irritable.

Still, it had it’s advantages sometimes. He eyed Optimus, wondering if he should have tried to soothe him with unassuming dominance. He could scrounge up a bit of that from his own code, although it wouldn’t be very strong.

Optimus caught his look and rolled his optics. “I’m fine,” he stressed. “Besides, I think after getting hit by Megatron’s field, any dominance is going to feel like acid.”

“Fair enough,” Ratchet shrugged, but quietly decided to keep a close eye on the kid. You never knew when complications would pop up, and Optimus was annoyingly stubborn about actually telling him what was wrong. Dominance and submissive coding was a nightmare to deal with, being stuck somewhere between a physical ailment and a mental one, but he’d do his best.

Optimus was still side-eying him, so he made a small show of examining Optimus’ scratched faceplates. “Well, your face will look like you lost a fight with the ground for a while, but it’s nothing your self repair can’t handle. I suppose we should get moving.”

Optimus opened his mouth to argue, only to be stopped by Ratchet’s look. He sighed. “We should,” he agreed resignedly, grabbing the hammer from where it rested on the wall.

The journey to Ultra Magnus’ room was uneventful, although security seemed to be a little non-plussed at how to handle Optimus carrying the Magnus Hammer since it was, technically, a weapon of possibly mass destruction.

Sentinel eventually stuck his head out the door, scowling. “Would you get in here already!” he said impatiently. “And give me that!” he said, snatching the hammer from Optimus’ hands, hissing in displeasure when its handle sparked.

“I’m sorry, Sentinel,” Optimus said as they walked inside, trying to cover Ratchet’s snort, “I just assumed-”

“Haven’t you learned your assumptions get bots killed,” Sentinel snapped, placing the hammer gently against the wall by the medical berth.

“Enough,” Ultra Magnus said, vocalizer rasping and popping from lack of use. “What is done is done.” He was propped up on the medical berth, attached to various silent monitors. A few tubes ran through his emergency intakes on his chest, carrying fluid in and out. Optimus saw Ratchet squint and frown, but stay silent.

“Ultra Magnus, sir,” Optimus said respectfully. “It’s good to see you up.”

“For a given value of up,” Ultra Magnus said. His optics roamed over Optimus. “You look quite good for someone who took on Megatron.”

“I was lucky,” Optimus said, trying to shove the embarrassed flush out of his field. “I didn’t think I would be able to do much besides stall him until help could arrive.”

“Well,  you couldn’t even do that,” Sentinel drawled. “And if you hadn’t hung up on me, I could have told you that all of our forces were occupied with evacuating civilians and holding the line to keep the Decepticons contained within the districts around Trypticon.”

“All of them?” Ratchet said blandly. “Goodness me, I thought that the increased militarization in Iacon was to prevent this sort of thing.”

Sentinel scowled, and Optimus hurried to speak before he could open his mouth. “I am sorry for, ah, taking the Magnus Hammer,” he said, layering submissiveness into his field. Sentinel tended to like that. “I wasn’t sure if I could take on Megatron without it, seeing as how it’s too easy for him to shrug off my axe. Besides which, I thought that if I were to walk into an ambush, the Hammer’s electrical abilities would be able to take out a larger number of enemies at once.”

“Well reasoned,” Ultra Magnus croaked with a nod. “But you cannot do that again, Optimus Prime.” There was a brush of dominance in his field, so weak and far gone from its usual vibrant rush that Optimus felt almost off-balance.

“Of course, sir,” he said automatically. “I understand.” I don’t mean that, he realized. He felt as though that should bother him more than it did.

“Do you now,” Ultra Magnus said. “Perhaps…” Sentinel and Optimus exchanged confused looks over Ultra Magnus’ head as he stared off into the distance, humming slightly to himself. This certainly wasn’t normal behavior. Optimus heard Ratchet quietly sigh behind him.

“In any case,” Ultra Magnus said suddenly, focusing back on the two Primes before him, “There is always much to be done, now more than ever. I did not expect to wake to the news that we had captured Megatron only to have a mass escape, but this means we are in more danger than ever. Be on the lookout for unusual behavior that may hint at new Decepticon movements. We know they are out there, and they will return. They have proven they may already be here.” He paused to take a few ragged inhalations. “I fear that I must rest now. Protect the Commonwealth, soldiers. Dismissed.”

“Sir!” Optimus and Sentinel said, saluting. They turned to leave as a medic entered the room. Ratchet said something to them in a low tone, but the other just shook their head and pushed him towards the door.

“Is it very bad?” Optimus asked quietly as the door slid shut behind them.

“Of course everything’s bad,” Sentinel snapped before Ratchet could say anything. He glared at the guards, who were staring straight ahead uncomfortably, as if optic contact was what would make this supposedly private conversation awkward.

Sentinel moved forward, grabbing Optimus’ elbow to guide him. Ratchet trailed after them, hovering like a particularly irritated Earth storm cloud.

“Optimus needs to rest-” he started.

“Optimus needs to stop causing new problems!” Sentinel hissed. “I’m trying to take care of things and you two are ruining it!”

“What have I ruined?” Optimus asked in confusion. “From the sound of it, no one would have been able to stop the Decepticons-”

Sentinel groaned in exasperation. “See! You don’t even know what our real problems are. Fine. You know what?”

“Since you’re incapable of keeping out of trouble, I’m sending you to where you at least can’t make it worse. Your pet techno-organic said that something was wrong on that disgusting mudball of a planet and said that your underling Bumblebee couldn’t talk to me at the moment.”

“What?” Optimus said, alarmed. “Sari and- What sort of trouble?!”

“I don’t know, and I really don’t care,” Sentinel said in annoyance. “There’s no reason for any Decepticons to still be there, and you rounded up the All Spark fragments to repair it. As far as I’m concerned, anything else is those squishies problems. But for now? You can go check it out. It’s not like you can make anything worse there.”

“And as for you,” he said, rounding on Ratchet with an accusatory finger already pointing. “You are to remain here, in Iacon, on Cybertron, since you refuse to find a secondary pilot for Omega Supreme.”

Ratchet looked more like a storm cloud than ever. “I have told the Council-”

“Too bad,” Sentinel snapped. “I don’t care what you think, I still hold authority until Ultra Magnus is back on his peds. And I want you here on Cybertron, and Optimus can go back to those stupid squishies.”

“Alone?” Ratchet said archly. “Didn’t we just prove that’s not a good plan?”

Sentinel rolled his optics. “It’s not like there’s anything on Earth that could seriously threaten him anymore.” - “Get outta here!” Mixmaster sneered, chivying off the tiny organics attempting to investigate their build site. “Shoo!”

“Ey, they’re kinda cute when you look at ‘em right,” Scavenger said. He winced as a bullet pinged off his plating. “Kinda noisy though.”

“They’re messin’ up our timeline,” Mixmaster grumbled. “You know how boss gets about that.”

“Yeah, well, boss is busy right now,” Scavenger said. He looked off into the distance, where Dirt Boss was busy yelling at some humans from atop the tank he had cerebro-shelled. The little bug dude was yelling back at him, but wasn’t getting much of anywhere. “We ain’t on the clock ‘til he gets back. ‘Sides, what’s so important here anyways that we gotta build here? Thought with Megatron gone we’d be doing stuff more discreet like or somethin’. Ain’t worth the trouble.”

Mixmaster shrugged eloquently. “This pink stuff’s worth a ton to the right folks,” he said. “Guess it’s good for us too? Got no flavor to it, not like that good oil though. Still, we set up this here mining rig and we can get set for life.”

“But do we really gotta set up here?” Scavenger said, leaning back against the scaffolding they already had up, ignoring how the humans seemed to panic as it groaned under the stress. “Organics like these are a workplace hazard. We can just go’n find some more-”

“There ain’t more!” Mixmaster argued. “Not yet, I think, if Dirt Boss’ is right. I’m lookin’ at this here energon stuff and it ain’t natural to this here planet, but it’s wellin’ up for some reason. Nearest I can tell, somethin’ pushed a reaction that’s causin’ this here organic scrap to start cyberizing. Gave it a bit ‘a sentio metallico to kick-start some slag, and the rest is some chemistry mumbo jumbo that you ain’t gonna understand anyhow.”

“Yes, but I might,” a new voice broke in.

The two Constructicons looked up to see one of the Starscream clones floating down, touching down with barely a sound.

“Who’s you?’ Mixmaster asked, instantly suspicious.

“Slipstream,” she said with a smile. “I think I can help you boys with your problems. Pro-bono, even. For free,” she clarified at their blank looks.

“Yeah?” Scavenger said, trying to make his leaning pose look as nonchalant as it had been a few clicks ago. “’Cause since you showed up, I got this real big problem-”

“I have null rays and a willingness to use them to take care of that ‘problem’,” Slipstream said. “Wanna keep that sentence going?”

“No ma’am,” Scavenger said, hands moving to cover his more delicate cyber-anatomy.

She gave a flinty smile. “Good. Now then. Do I talk to you, or is there someone else I need to terrorize first?”

[tinycrow]

I don’t believe in miracles

Chapter 4: Show you how

:: Antarctic City, Antarctica ::

After Ray stepped through the ground bridge, she moved quickly to the set of consoles nearby to supervise. Greeting Max who was at the smaller console, she looked around to see a minimal number of humans and bots nearby. Only a couple of her children, Shawn, Max, and three other humans she recognized as part of the security team were present. The room was still partially filled with materials from the warehouse, as it was the middle of a workday. She sent a comm to the Autobots.

~ Ray to Autobots. We’re ready to receive you. ~

~ Acknowledged. ~

Sideswipe in bipedal form glided on through with grace but servos twitching by his sides. His optics swept around the room, looking for something. They paused on the small ‘bots standing near some armed humans before continuing. It seemed he had not found anything bad, seeing as he called the others through. Ratchet walked in next, and then finally Optimus entered the ground bridge. Not able to leave the NEST base empty without suspicion, the rest of the Autobots stayed behind.

Ray let Max know to close the bridge, and the glimmering portal dissipated. Her voice was serene as she welcomed the alien ‘bots.

“Thank you for allowing us into your home,” Optimus returned.

The motherly femme moved gracefully to behind her smaller-framed children, resting a servo each on their shoulder pads. Her demeanor radiated pride as she introduced the humans in the room, stopping briefly when she got to her children. All throughout the introductions, she could see the fascinated glances to her younglings.

“These are two of my older children,” she said with a smile. She patted the shoulder of the grey-plated one, calling, “Aries,” then patted the slightly bulkier red one, “and Red Alert. To my understanding, they’ve been helping out with security lately.”

The named younglings straightened as they were introduced. The only ‘adult’ they had ever known was Ray (or was a human), and she was small compared to the height of some of these new arrivals. The two felt the pressure of keeping their home safe from possible threats and being too young/underpowered to do so. With an intuitive squeeze of their shoulders, Ray silently comm’d them with reassurances. They visibly relaxed.

Ratchet stepped forward, and with a soft word to her children, Ray stepped back. To the younglings’ credit, they stood still for the scan that followed. They seemed uncomfortable with the attention, however.

“Amazing. They appear to be in their second frames already, though they can only be about five stellar-cycles old.”

Always willing to indulge the old medic whom she viewed as a kind friend, Ray commented, “Due to the dangers present on Earth, I’ve advanced their maturation cycles and tend to arm them at this stage.”

“Fascinating. It reminds me of the war-frames that were sparked on Cybertron before we lost the AllSpark, yet with a longer period of immaturity.”

Ray gave Ratchet a confused look at the mention of war-frames, but let it pass for now. There would be time for that later.

She said, “I believe Max has the tour planned out for us.”

Max spoke loudly to get their attention from his much lower height on the floor, “We have warned our people ahead of time to keep the streets clear of unnecessary foot traffic, but please be cautious.”

“We will,” Optimus promised. “Please, lead the way.”

Shawn stayed behind to return to work. The rest of the group along with the Autobots exited through the ‘bot-sized doorway. The door’s smooth and quick opening was a great improvement to the buildings they were used to on the Autobots’ current base... a little detail that reminded them of Cybertron.

When they got into the streets, the sudden chill made them shiver, but Sideswipe attempted to brush it off. “It’s not that cold.”

Ray sounded amused as she mentioned, “The streets are warmed to an extent. It’s still very cold, however. Humans tend to use the underground tunnel system where it’s warmer.”

Optimus sounded considering, “How big are the tunnels?”

“They would fit you in your alt forms, but not bipedal. We thought you’d get a greater idea of the city’s layout by taking the streets,” Max answered for her.

The thoughtful leader nodded in understanding.

In a whirl of metal, Aries and Red Alert transformed into small and plain grey/red cars. Popping their doors open, the younglings split the three of Max’s security team between the two. Ray transformed into a black Nissan and took Max. Taking their lead, Optimus was the first to transform, followed by Sideswipe and Ratchet.

Ray privately comm’d the Autobots with instructions on how to sign up for the communication service and how to enter a group conversation using the communication servers. A group chat was started, with Max as the host.

(The following conversations take place in the group chat but I won’t be using the ~ ~ )

The group, headed by Aries and Red Alert, drove from the Gate Room that straddled the Business and Residential sectors deep into Residential. They saw a motley of human and Cybertronian-sized apartments and were impressed by the construction. It was explained that construction was sped up with help from Ray, mostly for the doors and other electronically controlled systems that were present throughout the sector.

Taking a roundabout route as they allowed the Autobots to take in the sights, the group proceeded into Industrial. This sector was much busier. Residential had been empty with no foot traffic. Industrial, however, had bots of various—smaller—sizes walking the streets and carrying heavy materials. Feeling a wave of heat hit their alt forms, the Autobots turned their attention to their right where they in essence saw what was a forge. Metals were melted and alloys were created. They could see basic weapons being forged in this area alongside tools of all sizes. On higher platforms were heavily armoured humans overseeing the creation of smaller sizes of tools and human weapons.

Because of how busy it was, they went slower here, needing to stop more than several times to let workers through. Max apologized for this over the private channel shared among the group. Though, the Autobots seemed to be too interested in the goings-on to care. Optimus even stated something to that effect.

Sideswipe couldn’t help but comment, “Ironhide would love to see this.”

“He would be welcome, as long as certain rules are followed,” Ray indulged.

Sideswipe asked, “Rules?”

“We’ll get to that later,” Ray deferred.

It was in the stop-and-go of this sector that they got a better look at the Core, the main power plant that brought to life the entire city. It was huge, a main metal body with large cylinders and thick cables leading out from it toward the forge as well as other places. None of the Autobots were exactly specialized in this kind of engineering, but they understood it was a technological feat the humans didn’t have. It was worthy of some awe.

Eventually, they proceeded from Industrial into the last sector, Business. Business was... busy, but it had much less foot traffic than the previous area. Max took charge of pointing out human hangouts like the cafés, arcades, bars, and even the one large building that was ‘laser tag’. The Autobots’ attention diverted as they accessed the internet to look up what it was, as it sounded quite dangerous. They relaxed as they realized it was just like a fight simulation with nonlethal devices.

Ray in turn pointed out some important buildings such as Security HQ, the Finance Department, and other such things.

As they turned a bit closer to the center of the city, Ray pointed to a large building with an outside patio that was ‘bot-sized. “This is where you can get Energon. Because it draws a lot of power from the Core, it’s also closer to it,” she explained.

The Autobots seemed to perk up, or at least as much as their alt forms could express. Energon was a highly valued resource for trade as well as fuel for their kind of life. The fact that their power plant had the ability to support making Energon was exciting news, and something the Autobots were itching to get their hands on.

She felt their excitement and felt bad when she had to continue, “Because it’s a precious resource, it’s... discouraged to partake in overdrinking. There are daily and monthly caps that are strictly enforced.”

The alien ‘bots’ excitement lessened, realizing this meant they couldn’t immediately stockpile, but they understood why the measures were in place.

Ray tried to cheer them up, “Still, if you need some, you are welcome to enjoy it here.”

“Thank you,” Optimus rumbled, “We may just do that if you don’t mind.”

“Of course.”

Thinking about the younglings, Ratchet asked, “What grade of Energon do you serve the younglings?”

“We serve a ‘weak’ variety for my sparklings though that kind is made at... the Nursery,” Ray reluctantly admitted, and quickly went on to explain the different grades available, hoping to distract them.

“You said the Nursery,” reminded Ratchet, “Will we get to see it?”

There was a quiet “ooh” somewhere in the group chat. If Ray could glare, she probably would’ve done so to whoever did that. Obviously, her human crew thought that ‘mama bear’ would not want the aliens around her babies.

... Just because they weren’t wrong didn’t mean they could embarrass her like this.

As a low vibration shook his seat, Max seemed to sense where this was going and tried to soothe the bristling Ray, interrupting, “We already passed the Nursery. However, in a future visit, perhaps we could arrange something that won’t step on anyone’s toes.”

“You don’t honestly think we’re going to harm a sparkling,” Ratchet balked, feeling insulted.

Max was fast to deny that, “No, no, of course not. However, our youngest are highly protected.”

Ray, still bristling a little, shocked them with her defensiveness. She firmly denied, “No one that hasn’t been personally approved of by me and gone through the process of getting permits is allowed in the Nursery.”

“Ratchet,” Optimus warned.

“I don’t mean any harm, Ray. I would just like to ensure the health of the sparklings,” Ratchet argued.

Finding herself unable to articulate through group chat why she insisted on everyone following a certain process, she transformed to bipedal, caught Max, and set him down easily. A little winded but unharmed, Max complained weakly, and an equally serious apology was returned.

Everyone behind her braked hard, then transformed as well. The two younglings in the lead stopped slowly and unsurely, but didn’t feel comfortable transforming with passengers.

Ratchet stood his ground as Ray stepped up to him. Her now-seeing, green optics stared hard into his own blue, and he was taken aback at how much fire was in them. In their ‘care’ at the Autobot base, she had been so tranquil and seemed to avoid conflict to the point of self-sacrifice—they wondered how she had survived to this point. But the femme staring up at him now was combative and defiant.

She seemed to find her words, and the Autobots listened with slight apprehension, but no fear. Optimus stepped forward a little, ready to intervene.

She vented quietly, finding her inner peace, and said calmly, “Listen, I’m not being difficult for the sake of being difficult. I understand. You’re old, so old that I can imagine so many experiences have been gained, more than I could have possibly gained—magic artifact or not. And you, you no doubt have intimate knowledge about a Cybertronian’s physical well-being.

But I also know that it has been a long time since you’ve known peace. How long has it been since the war started? Since you’ve even been around a baby? How am I to know what your emotional state is and what your intentions will be once you have access to my babies? The problem is I don’t, and I have a responsibility to find that out before letting you or anyone touch my kids.”

Ratchet shuttered his optics, the questions hitting harder and making him feel very old all of a sudden. He may not agree with everything she was saying, but he understood the... reluctance, now. From her perspective, he was an almost stranger asking her to let him into her sanctum, so to speak. She let him into her home, showing she was willing to begin trusting him. Ratchet would have to work at it until she fully did.

Regretting that Sideswipe was in the vicinity, Ratchet did something he rarely did. He sincerely apologized. The gob-smacked look on Sideswipe’s face made him want to throw something, but for Ray’s sake he resisted.

Still, there was more that needed to be said. “I will endeavour to make myself worthy of your trust, for you and your sparklings.”

“I don’t doubt you will,” Ray admitted without hesitation, her dermas reluctantly turning into a smile.

Max let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, and then checked his phone for the time.

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but it’s getting quite late,” the chief of security broke the silence.

“The humans will be wondering where we are,” Sideswipe remarked.

“I am sorry, but we must return before they realize we have left the base,” Optimus said, paused, and asked, “Will you be coming back with us? We would treat you as a comrade.”

Ray hesitated. She knew it would cause them trouble, but her place was here with her people.

“No. I’m sorry. If there’s something I can do to make up for the trouble I’ll have caused, let me know.”

“As the humans say, it’s no biggie,” the regal Autobot leader joked.

Or, at least, she thought he did. She laughed anyway, and the atmosphere brightened.

Ray smiled, and said, “You’ll always have a safe haven here.”

“Thank you,” the Autobot leader said simply.

The black-plated femme transformed back into a car, and Max got into her cabin. With a short word to Aries and Red Alert, they were off to the Gate Room.

[verdigrisprowl]

June 16 Bevel’s Movie Night - The Greatest Showman & Steven Universe

Everyone agreed the main character was a jerk. However, circuses look fun.

Prowl left before Steven Universe.

Today ItsyBitsySpyers *Soundwave trudges in and parks himself. He's busy as anything catching up after his vacation, but he's here and ready to watch this thing.* Bevel Hey, Soundwave. *waves* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Good evening.]] Bevel Did you have fun on your vacation? ItsyBitsySpyers [[He enjoyed himself more than was expected.]] Bevel Aw, that is good. Did you talk to the Pahvans any? ItsyBitsySpyers [[No. He decided not to stay there. Staying might have brought them harm.]] VProwl *appears* Bevel Hey, Prowl. *waves* ItsyBitsySpyers *Greeting ping.* VProwl *... well, looks like there's only one option today, so takes his usual seat. a vague nod in bevel's general direction* *on to question #2: does he have to worry about soundwave telling—? no wait, she already knows. never mind, no problems here.* ItsyBitsySpyers *Soundwave nods to Prowl - with a small pause to cringe a little at that bad high note - and and settles in.* Ratchet *pops in* Bevel Where did you go after that, Soundwave? VProwl *oh never mind there's ratchet hi ratchet prowl's gonna go sit with ratchet sorry soundwave prowl's gone* Bevel ((Starting asap so get food and potty and all that if you need it Hi, Ratchet! Ratchet Hey! ItsyBitsySpyers *Oh. Well, that's not unusual for these nights. Still, he'd got his hopes up once Prowl sat down.*

[[To Risa. Ask your creator if you know nothing about it.]] VProwl *... RATCHET doesn't know. ratchet only ever caught the very beginning stages. all right, now prowl gets to be nervous.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Good evening, Ratchet.]] Bevel I have never been there, but I know about Risa. Ratchet Evening, Soundwave. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Then you can be sure he had a tolerable time.]] *Soundwave perks.*

[[Music already?]] ItsyBitsySpyers *Ohhhh this is going to be a good night. Well, if he doesn't have to share the couch, he might as well stretch across it and fold one arm over his middle.* VProwl *Prowl must be tired. The shouty parts of the singing are hurting his audials.* Bevel *lays down on her stomach on the floor* ItsyBitsySpyers *Tilts his head. Was that not a real circus, then?* VProwl *Oh, so it wasn't just the one song, this is a singy movie.* *...... No dogs so far.* Bevel Rude. ItsyBitsySpyers *Really does not like the old human.* VProwl ... They could solve the problem by inviting /him/ into /their/ home. ItsyBitsySpyers [[The only way beings so obsessed with class and currency would dare is to have him work for them, as before.]] *Irritable puff.* VProwl *Okay, now he knows he's tired, the sheets are giving him a headache.* Bevel I like his little shadow machine. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Clever, clever human.]] VProwl Not talented at advertising, is he? ItsyBitsySpyers [[Doesn't seem to be, no.]] ItsyBitsySpyers [[He looks to have finally hit a kind of stride.]] VProwl He's collecting employees he can't yet pay, not customers. *there IS a dog.* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Yes, but at least there are people interested in being a part of it. Which is more than he had to start with.]] VProwl Hm. He knows what to do with negative press, at least. Bevel And they are doing really well too. That is a lot of people in the audience. ItsyBitsySpyers [[No doubt that old human would perish of shock if he saw.]] VProwl ... I can't help but get the sense that... if he were to write a propaganda movie about his own life to justify exploiting outcasts for profit, this is what it would sound like. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Perhaps he did.]] [[Is he still alive?]] Bevel All negotiations should include singing and dancing. VProwl Ugh. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Some of us would have an unfair advantage.]] VProwl I rather enjoy being able to get things done. Ratchet [[ is that MJ ]] Bevel ((Yes VProwl ... I haven't heard a laugh like that since before the Senate was murdered. Bevel It sounded really fake. ItsyBitsySpyers [[You do not sound pleased to hear one again.]] VProwl I'm neutral on it. VProwl Now /she's/ being hoodwinked. The real answer is "because you happened to be here when I was." ItsyBitsySpyers *Suspicious.* [[Is he infatuated with her. Is that what that is.]] [[....And now he leaves them in the cold.]] VProwl Mm-hmm. Bevel Boo. Ratchet He really called them that. VProwl He certainly did. ItsyBitsySpyers *Shaking his head.* [[Vile. He hopes they will all choose to burn their employment contracts.]] [[And the young one is a coward.]] Bevel At least he wanted to put them in the box instead of the standing room. ItsyBitsySpyers [[At least he wanted that, yes.]] VProwl Or unionize. Bevel Unionize! VProwl I heard that's a thing humans do. They could make more money for being called names by their boss. ItsyBitsySpyers [[...Why is he not following his companion and his offspring.]] Bevel *scowls* ItsyBitsySpyers *Angry buzzing.* VProwl ... I'm leaning back toward quitting. Quit and start their own circus. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Agreed.]] Bevel Yeah. Bevel All these parents are awful. VProwl All of these people, in general, are awful. Bevel *nods* VProwl I'm fairly certain the outcasts only aren't awful because they have yet to be afforded the rank and wealth to permit them to be so. The main character started off approximately as low as them and became awful the instant he was rich enough to be so. I think it's a running theme. Bevel I hope not. VProwl The sole exception appears to be his wife, who married him despite his rank; but she's hardly had any opportunity to do anything this movie except interact with him. Bevel *bad father on top of everything else, least favorite character forever* ItsyBitsySpyers [[Two credits on leaving his wife for the opera singer. He has abandoned everything and everyone else that supported him and gave him the opportunity he values.]] Bevel Noooooo. That would be the worst ending ever 😔 VProwl Hm. The moment after the opera singer pointed out that those born into privilege don't know what it's like to be born without it, he threw that concept into his wife's face. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Hmm.]] VProwl ... Why's SHE quitting? Did she find him THAT appealing after one party in the queen's presence? Is—is he supposed to be an appealing person? ItsyBitsySpyers [[Not in the slightest.]]

[[...Oh, Primus.]] Bevel He said he was leaving. VProwl Well. He deserved it. THEY didn't, though. ItsyBitsySpyers [[...Do not tell him the one semi-respectable human employer in this whole affair is--]] Bevel Aw no. VProwl The opera singer, though—just—decided to—casually endanger his reputation and family life in public, because he invited her across the ocean to sing and she was disappointed that "sing" wasn't code for "fuck"? What sense does that make. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Vindictiveness.]] VProwl It's ludicrous. Ratchet It is ironic that the one decent decision he made brought him to ruin. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Presenting them as equals? Hm. He certainly doesn't /treat/ them as such.]] VProwl He is an actor. VProwl If they want their home back, why rally around him for it? I still say they should go start their own circus. Bevel Yeah. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Still agreed.]] [[Himself?]] Bevel I think he means his family? VProwl If they think they need his name and face attached to it to make it work, then THEY can HIRE him to perform for them. Bevel Ha! He does not have any money, so I bet he will need them more than they need him. ItsyBitsySpyers [[...He led them on and ran away on a train?]] VProwl He's got a questionable reputation attached to a recent scandal. THEY'VE got an act. I think he's tracking down his family. Bevel He is! ItsyBitsySpyers [[Easier to transport, less expensive if burned. Not unwise.]] VProwl THAT much fabric? *yknow. the movie's almost over. the loud notes are still hard to listen to.* Bevel *sorry, Prowl* VProwl *well. he could be sleeping better.* VProwl ((... how do you park an elephant)) ItsyBitsySpyers ((any which way you want)) VProwl ((I GUESS)) ItsyBitsySpyers [[Stop singing at the ballet recital. How rude.]] Bevel ((excuse my police, but this guy just double parked his elephant in front of my carriage, can you tow it? VProwl ((*handcuffs its trunk*)) Bevel ((lol ItsyBitsySpyers [[Well. That was an interesting look into human entertainment history.]] Bevel Do they still have circuses on Earth? VProwl There's a circus on my Cybertron. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Oh, yes. They d-- what?]] *Snap attention.* [[Where? When?]] Bevel There is? *sits up excitedly* Ratchet [[ didn't the barnum circus officially shut down a couple years ago ]] VProwl Outside of Iacon. I think it's continuously going. One of the performers owns a bar in Metroplex. Bevel ((last year I think Ratchet [[ i saw it once as a kid, i don't remember much from it though except for the tent and discovering i don't like the big bread pretzels ]] Bevel ((same... also i remember loving the trapeze artists ItsyBitsySpyers ((it closed last year yeah)) VProwl *oh, nope, Prowl isn't staying for this show.* I should head out. Evening. Ratchet Seeya, Prowl. Bevel Night, Prowl. ItsyBitsySpyers [[Goodnight, Prowl.]] [[He should be on his way as well. He is very behind still, and there are things he must check on.]] *Maybe including that circus.* VProwl *disappears* Bevel Aw, ok, Soundwave. ItsyBitsySpyers *Nods, rises, and heads on his way.* Bevel ((i legit forgot she threw herself out of the van like that omg VProwl ((that's one of the most important moments in the show)) Bevel ((this is probably the episode when everything really changed VProwl ((i'd agree with that)) Bevel ((you got hints of things before this and some weird, funky stuff happening, but that reveal was just so big. I'm still sad I was spoiled on it before I started watching the show Bevel (("ok. bye." lol Bevel ((ok, that is all I have to show tonight, thanks everyone for coming VProwl ((gnight~))

[transhumanitynet]

The Future Acts Like You - How To Live in the Future Part 7

My friends and I were walking dogs the other day on city greenbelt trails, observing how polite and well-behaved the female dogs were when compared to male dogs, how much less likely they were to get riled up by meeting strange pets — and the thought occurred to me (as surely it must have for many others) that if it were up to choice, most people might prefer a female dog for this one reason. How, if we could breed the ratio down to the market’s preference, or find some way to pre-arrange the sexes of a litter (like they can by turning off one gene in turtles), it might be 80/20 females/males, or hardly any males at all. And then I realized that we’re here already – modifying mammal genomes is old hat by now, and all that stands between us and deciding if your baby will be born a boy or girl (or intersex, or some new thing) is just a few years’ of Moore’s Law driving down the price of lab tests and in vitro or in vivo interventions. We are very close to giving women what they’ve always wanted under patriarchy: the ability to reproduce without a man involved.

Sure, birth control was liberating, but imagine how it’s going to be when a sufficiently large XX population can clock out and then womyn-ufacture Amazons on their apotheosis-feminism, GMO coral vulva artificial island. But of course, Athena born from Zeus’ brow is quintessential patriarchy — equally the goal of men, since written records started, to extract themselves from their dependence on the mysteries of reproduction, to appropriate them with the scientific program, finishing the murder of Sophia and then peacing out, and up to some transcendent Man Cave in the sky, Elysium in orbit, hanging out in virtual reality with perfectly obedient and caring AI girlfriends. But of course, this is The Matrix, and it doesn’t get more Cosmic Mom than that. It isn’t hard to see the dawn light of an age in which both sides stand hands on hips, across the atmosphere from one another, shouting, “We don’t need you anymore!”

Nor is it hard to see why it’s ridiculous. It won’t work like that, because time’s not so much a centrifuge that pulls polarities apart as it’s a live volcano, constantly erupting, spreading novel opportunities and forms to make new landscapes that include the past, but ooze beyond it. And as each side of the War of Sexes clusters further from each other on the graph, a huge magmatic bell curve upswells in between them, opening our options. We will have our age of clones, chimerae, and designer babies; and we’ll go on dating one another, even when it seems archaic posed against the novel kinds of families in a Cambrian Explosion of communal “body plans” that place the nuclear “Mom, Dad, & Kids” at the top left of a new periodic table, opening a vast new chemistry of love and reproductive options.

First, though, we will suffer through an era that empowers narcissists to make more narcissists with even greater ease, and without having to recruit a partner to help raise the lovely little bastards they create. I see it now: instead of virtue-signaling as single parents, people running solo with their mini-mes will be the objects of suspicion, probably contempt:

“I’m raising him to inherit my dangerous and lonely life of bounty hunting!”

“Can you believe he paid the carbon tax to make a copy of himself? If everybody did that, we’d need eighteen Earths to make it work…!”

“I thought she was amazing on our first date, till I realized that her little girl was just a backup. No way, dude, I’d only be a plaything for that woman.”

People will look wistfully back on The Good Old Days, when you knew that the cute guy with his kid in Central Park was not just readying the vessel for his memory-and-wallet transfer in another fifty years… And yet none of these biotech shenanigans will ever guarantee the realized dream of solipsists: to carry on forever, and thus matter to the story, True and Timeless, an immortal in the flesh, around which everything ephemerally spins. The best that we can get’s a domino chain of compelling duplicates — in just the same way kids are now already the extension of their parents’ unexamined death anxieties and unfulfilled desires — the iteration of a process changing gradually enough (and also, paradoxically, flickering fast enough) that we’re fooled into interpreting it as continuous.

But history does not repeat itself; it rhymes, and rhyming couplets will appear in longer lines, or shorter, and embedded in more, or less, complicated schemes, as we convince ourselves that we’ve achieved eternity, or push rebelliously opposite, to try and offer something fresh to who, or what, comes next. For meditators this is already the case: the ego is an “optical illusion”“caused” by oscillations in the coming-in-and-out-of-being of sufficiently-alike appearances. You only act like you already, since your “you” is based on feedback and experience, and you can’t ever know the whole you all at once;and you treat your future selves like children, whose responsibility it is to carry on your legacy, as if you owned them, or they owed you; or to break the pattern of a self divided, self-assessed as “broken,” somehow.

Future You, by contrast, is emergent, rhyming, under zero obligation to agree to contracts you imagine it inherits — just as “mind uploading” falsely presupposes that it is desirable to have (or be) some magical computer that believes it’s you for the two seconds that it takes to leave that personality behind. (Why not just die?) Or worse, preserved in static non-life at a ghastly price, unchanging in direct proportion to the violence required to export entropy indefinitely, to transform from human being into humanoid refrigerator. (In this sense, death is life: because participating in the transformation cannot be escaped, and we’re alive as much as we’re aware of our participation.)

Increasingly high fidelity echoes of people further disrupt attempts at linear history.

You already have a fossil of you made of data, “shaped” like you but in n + a million more dimensions than a human can imagine at a time. Everything you do is tracked, and this is common knowledge, and the reason is that information “wants” to integrate, that evolution tilts toward senses and intelligence as adaptations to the ever-more-complex occasions senses bring upon us in the first place. It’s an ever-loving ratcheting of quickening self-inquiry that isn’t always pretty; curiosity comes in the form of turtle-persecuting birds and other more deliberate sadism, the police search and The Eye of Sauron and so on. And this results in things like Cambridge Analytica, which learned to please its masters by presenting them with cunning models of us, insights into how to press our buttons, how to literally steer us into multiple non-overlapping narratives and kill our opportunity to have an easy argument as citizens of a consensual reality.

But people hammer cannons into bells and back again, and round and round…and weapons like the profile advertisers use on you, the cast impression that you leave of every decision that you’ve made since you first intersected with the Internet… (I realize that for most of you, you never intersected but have always been not-two, but this applies to you, as well — and, arguably, The Acceleration is a transtemporal object and exudes time, draws us into it, our attention on it is our fascination to a serpent, and we’re in the belly of the beast Already Always, and there never was no Internet, no Noösphere, no highly patterned information at the intersections, striving.)

…and every decision that was made about you, also part of the Big You you can’t see, You The Elephant, officially and formally transfinite in complexity as we explore down magnitudes of scale, a multitude of multitudes…

…all that can be turned into the instruments of art, and your hard-forked personae generated with assistance from an always-more-complete (but also always-incomplete, retreating, deepeningly weird) recording can be the new media, The Last and First New Media. Remixed along a functionally infinite set of dimensions and indefinitely, you-not-yous proliferate.

Most of you will likely get along.

But fleshy clone or software “mindclone,” the best that we can get is to extend life into non-life, until (as has already happened in the sciences, and will soon pounce out of them to snare us all in its unpleasant truth) these definitions snap, and leave us navigating a deterritorialized liminal zone, an uncanny simulacra-land where “living things” become deprived of their priority, not known transparently and fully as controllable/predictable, but found beneath our microscopes to be composed of ever weirder and unknowable phenomena no would comfortably call “life.” The soul escapes to everywhere, diffuse, without allegiance, coming into focus on the shores in crashing surf, and every bit as happy to inhabit fog computing meshes as our mess of flesh and blood. Complexity “emerges” into our awareness, not into “reality” — it enters from the theater itself, from the occluded, at the “boundaries,” in between the voices of a choir, where sea meets land and oscillating waves reveal by contrast “difference(s),” Gregory Bateson says, “that make…a difference.”

The closest we can get, again, is with provisional, loose, working definitions that stay open to the force of revelation. When Alan Turing asked, “Can a submarine swim?” — when Timothy Morton says that we are “weak” before the Great & Terrible reality of “hyperobjects” like the Biosphere or Singularity — when Kevin Kelly tells us science manufactures questions exponentially faster than it answers them, and so experiment and prayer converge at Mystery worship — this is their message: we lose solid footing in the future (ever-more the loudest part of now), and first to go is the container of belief in sure things that has cradled us for centuries. What once were “sure things” still appear as traces, tracers like the afterimages left on a retina from staring at the Sun, the spectral fossils of modernity, luminous vestiges that haunt the shadows cast by the Atomic Age’s Angel as it enters, interrupting histories and worlds to deliver us into the crowded Noösphere.

The human form will live beyond humanity…often imagined as a diaspora of freed slave replicants.

We might consider this, as Erik Davis does, “re-animism” — a revival of the lived experience of haunted stones and forests, all reincarnated as the silicon chips, fractal aerials, semantic tress of “virtual machines,” and sigil-magic logo mascot animals, quite happy to return to our mundane realities in forms more suited to their nowhere-in-particular-ness. But maybe it’s more accurate to say the disenchantment of the modern world has run its course by finally erasing itself (and the world) as the last spell spoken to protect us from the spooky mess of things, a failing ward — not a “re-animism” so much as an accidental welcoming-back as we all become transparent (and thus sensitive, aware of, maybe even wise) to forces that we never truly banished.

So, the future acts like you because as we grow meek in our attunement to it, we allow a conversation to occur. It learns our mannerisms, like the metamorphic mannequins of Terminator 2 or Alex Garland’s version of Annihilation, or (more heinously) John Carpenter’s The Thing, or (sentimentally) the aliens of Carl Sagan’s Contact — weirdness taking shape to interface with us, inquisitive, its motives totally unknowable.

Rave Egg Wants For Nothing. Rave Egg Is INEFFABLE.

To drive this home with repetition, this is already the case: the alien reality of our own bodies, papered over with a sense of home and deep familiarity, disclosed by our collaborations with nonhuman scientific instruments to be endlessly-shifting puzzleboxes, deeply Other.

“What do you want,” we ask — and, straining to discern an audible reply, we might hear something about selfish genes, or entropy, or childhood attachment issues, or The Lord’s Good Work, or (similarly) our participation in the future history of unborn gods. But these are all refractions and distortions, echoes of the ghost notes of the choir-roar of the black hole that has already swallowed us and who-knows-what-else. The deeper that we listen, the more we empty subjectivity into the object and accept its speech, the more apparent it is that the future acts like you because you act just like the future, too; you can’t not. Consequently, it is “for” no-thing and for all things; it is the All-Thing, and all things are rendered equally mysterious and strange before this knowing.

Uncanny even for the uncanny: The liquid metal mimetic T-1000 mistakes a mannequin for one of his kind.

What this means “in practical terms” is that we will spend this interregnum between Ages either in the bardo, lost within a maelström of appearances; or in the zendo, learning to appreciate (and be) “miegakure,” the aesthetic of the garden in which thirteen stones are carefully arranged so that you never see them all at once. One of the thirteen stones is always hidden, and that incomplete view thus points past delusional “completeness” to a hyperspace in which what we call time is the rotation of a mystery afloat on deeper mystery — just like the “glass chrysanthemum” that meets some DMT explorers at the moment that they’re born out of their lives and into what always-already IS, mistaken as a death because we pass through the distracting clarity of that peacock mandala into no-space/all-space, no-time/all-time, in which everything’s already happened.

It is the water that the water swims in. We are made of it, including you and your AI assistants and your clones and children and the other other-selves more distal still, distilled until it’s easier to see the ghost in the machine, the you you can’t convince yourself is you, in all its splendor and its overwhelming strangeness…

Each zendo is a bardo and vice versa; we are always traveling, always invited into deeper seeing. This gets more and more apparent — or comprises more of the apparent — as things weird around us. We meet weird halfway, accepting our perversity and bottomlessness in just, equal measure to accepting the surprising life of the “inanimate.” We get a hell of a lot cozier with living in a noisy void of whirling, breathing unknowns vying for attention even as they dodge our scrutiny. It’s just another day in the profanely sacred Pandemonium.

SalviaDroid knows what it’s like to have everything trying to distract you. Don’t give in to astonishment!

From here to there — at least if we pretend that prophecy (in speaking of the timeless, evergreen, and always-true) can be prediction (and thus stretch from past to future “forward,” as with time-space synesthesia, and can be read like Doppler-shifted history) — we stand to suffer some extraordinary shocks.

Expect the sci fi usuals: love bots that take the shape of your departed partner(s); mansions full of talking toys that remix “Beast” and “Beauty;” 3D-printed “respawns” that arrive too soon and sue for your identity; software-person genocide; high-resolution body scans that live online and let you run scenarios until you lose track of which basement level of the dream you’re in; Siri making calls on your behalf and forging your identity (with and without permission); intelligent memorials you visit in VR sets dressed up looking like your parents in their old house; an entire menagerie of slightly-out-of-focus junior holograms of you that sit on either shoulder and debate like parliament about what you should do next. And you listen even though they’re out of focus, because they are privy to a wider view than you, they help translate the flood of information, some folks run a lot more at a time than you, but you’re conservative and two seems plenty.

(It’s already this way — ask any neuroscientist — but soon you’ll have two intuitions, neither of which you can be entirely sure hasn’t been suborned by hackers. Oh well — at least you can compare them to each other for a third opinion, always weighing new perspectives, forking when you all can’t reach consensus, delegating runtime on the fogmesh to the version that refuse to play so they can spin off into some human but solipsistic microverse, your self an integrated legion, cross-platform ecology, that blurs and fringes at the margins, no concrete delineation other than what we place somewhat arbitrarily between the “I” and “it,” the things you are and your appearances.)

Do I really look like that?

(This is a draft chapter from my first book, in progress, and a companion text to Future Fossils Podcast. Learn more at Patreon.com/MichaelGarfield.)

The Future Acts Like You – How To Live in the Future Part 7 was originally published on transhumanity.net

[kprciffdw]

Kim Possible: The Extremely Secret Files-Part 24

Arriving into battle, Kim and Ratchet worked together to fight against the vicious beast. It had proven to be a very tough battle, perhaps even their toughest yet. The beast fought back in several different ways; all of these attempts that were very dangerous and potentially deadly. It threw everything it had on them and even threw up some of them, ew, but they were really able to hold their own and managed to handle them all. It was a very, very long and tough battle, but they were eventually able to defeat the beast and brought it down.

After the vicious battle, Angela came walking in. Angela: "You did it!"

She kissed both Ratchet and Clank on their heads and closely embraced Kim. Ron came walking in with Mr. Fizzwidget, greatly startling Ratchet and Kim. Angela: "It's OK, guys. This is the real Mr. Fizzwidget. Qwark had him tied up in a supply closet the whole time. Ron and I were able to find him." Ron: "And thankfully not too late." Mr. Fizzwidget: "Everyone, you have my profound gratitude." Kim: "Oh, please, so not the drama." Ratchet: "Yeah, we're just sorry we didn't get that Helix-o-Morph back…"

Suddenly, the beast spat out Qwark and then, Qwark spat out the Helix-o-Morph. Kim: "Ew." Ron: "Oh, that's just sick."

Angela picked up the device and observed it. Kim: "So, what do you think could be wrong with that thing?"

Clank observed it from underneath. Angela: "I don't know…it could take months of research and…" Clank: "The battery is in backwards."

The entire group seemed dumbfounded by this news. Qwark: "Oops." Mr. Fizzwidget: "Imbecilic to the very last."

Just then, the beast got up and was about to attack again. Angela zapped it with the Helix-o-Morph, not only shrinking it down but making it docile and cuddly as it nuzzled Mr. Fizzwidget. He seemed very flattered. Mr. Fizzwidget: "Easy, boy." Angela: "Now I just need to amplify the device with Megacorp's TV transponders and that should be able to cure the other Protopets." Ron: "Alright! Coolio!" Rufus: "Yeah! Cool!"

Then at that moment, the Protopet was becoming aggressive again. Ratchet: "Uh…guys? That thing is…it's becoming hostile again."

It looked towards Ron, which terrified him. Ron: "KP!"

He ran as it chased after him. Angela tried to zap it with the Helix-o-Morph but nothing was happening. Kim: "Angela, do something!" Angela: "I'm trying but nothing's happening." Ratchet: "What the heck is going on!? Why is that thing attacking Ron!?"

The creature got really close to Ron and pounced at him with its mouth wide open. Everyone else observed as there was a tearing noise. Some seem relieved while others were shocked in an awkward manner. Angela: "Aw, it was just hungry."

The Protopet was chomping on Ron's pants that it clearly tore off of him. Ron: "For my pants!?" Mr. Fizzwidget: "Astounding! It seems as though your pants are made from some strange material that creature finds to be incredibly appetizing. We must analyze that material and have it mass produced as sustenance for these beloved creatures." Angela: "I'll get on that right, after we cure the Protopets, that is." Ratchet: "Kimberly, please tell me Wade has finished with the Indestructible Pants." Kim: "I don't know. I'll ask him as soon as I can." Mr. Fizzwidget: "Oh, uh, young missy. Kim Possible was it?" Kim: "Yep, that's right." Mr. Fizzwidget: "I was told by Ronald that you were looking for this thing."

He pulled out what appeared to be a piece of the space shuttle. Kim was very ecstatic. Kim: "Yes! That's a piece of my dad's space shuttle! Where did you find it!?" Mr. Fizzwidget: "It was stashed away very close to where I was found. Ronald was very insistent on giving it to you right away. So, here you go, young lady."

He handed the shuttle piece over to Kim, she then pulled out the Kimmunicator. Kim: "Wade, we found the final piece, but just to verify, we did collect all of the pieces, right?"

Wade checked the monitor. Wade: "Yep, every last piece has been accounted for." Kim: "Yes! That's great! Did you hear that, Ratchet?" Ratchet: "Yeah! We did it, Kimberly! Now we can finally rebuild your dad's space shuttle so we can go after Drakken and Shego then take back your dad's space station."

They were both so thrilled that they embraced each other and spun around. They then stopped and became mesmerized by each other for a brief moment, edging their faces closer together. Angela: "Ahem."

They stopped and looked towards Angela. Angela: "You know, you guys have helped us out tremendously, so if you would like, we would gladly rebuild that space shuttle for you." Kim: "Really? Are you sure that you want to help us out?" Mr. Fizzwidget: "But of course. We owe you so much for your help. Also, Megacorp has some of the best mechanics, engineers and researchers money can buy. We'll have that space shuttle of yours up and running before you know it." Ratchet: "Well…if you insist…then OK. Just to let you know, we have been working on some modifications to the shuttle a while back. There was still one bit of work that needed to be done before it was stolen and broken up by Drakken." Angela: "That won't be a problem. I would be more than happy to finish up that last modification for you." Kim: "OK, then. Here you go."

She handed all of the shuttle pieces to Angela. Kim: "Treat it well, OK? It's…a unique space shuttle to say the least." Angela: "Will do."

At that time, Qwark attempted to sneak away. Lilo: "Not so fast, dummy-head!"

He was then startled by suddenly noticing Lilo, Stitch and several of Stitch's cousin. Stitch: "(growl) You go nowhere, troublemaker." Qwark: "Now, now, no need to…get nasty on me…little ones…easy…" Kim: "Lilo! Stitch!"

Everyone rushed towards the duo and the other Experiments. Ratchet: "Didn't think you guys would show up here." Lilo: "Yeah, we made our way here just after that broadcast by this dummy-head was made. Several times during that broadcast, one of Stitch's cousins reacted; Fibber or Experiment 032. He reacts every time someone tells a lie. So when he was talking about stopping this horrible catastrophe or even trying to pin this on you guys, we knew immediately that something was amiss, so we got here as fast as we could to help out." Ratchet: "Wow, that's great. Thank you guys so much." Lilo: "It was no trouble." Stitch: "Ih! Lilo and Stitch and our Ohana only want to help out Kim, Ratchet, Ron and Clank, since they have helped us out. It's our way of saying Mahalo." Clank: "Yes, that is very nice of you, but your help is not needed. Everything is under control." Ratchet: "Yeah, the Protopet threat is being neutralized and the person responsible for all of it has been thwarted." Kim: "Well…actually, he was self-foiling; not surprising considering how much of a dim-wit he is." Lilo: "Yeah, we noticed that, too. We still want to help anyway. Right, Stitch?" Stitch: "Ih!" Angela: "Well, if you insist, you can deal with Qwark over here." Lilo: "It will be our pleasure. Stitch?"

Stitch growled as he approached Qwark. Qwark: "Now, now, nice…blue…dog…thing…" Mr. Fizzwidget: "Hold on for a second, youngsters, I have a better idea. I'm thinking of allowing this imbecile to pay off a hefty debt for what he has put this entire galaxy through. You're more than welcome to lend a hand with this." Lilo: "Absolutely, sir. Just tell us what you need us to do and we'll do it. Right, Ohana?"

All of Stitch's cousin's cheered. Lilo: "OK, then, let's go."

They all left while forcing Qwark out with them. Mr. Fizzwidget left with Angela, Ron walked out with them. Ron: "By the way, I've noticed that you haven't been talking in weird vocabulary that makes no sense. You don't really talk like that, right?" Mr. Fizzwidget: "Of course not, young man, it was all that imposter talking that way. Most likely trying to make himself sound smarter." Ron: "Oh, so instead of doing that, he made you sound like some weird-talking old nutcase who was completely losing his mind. No offense." Mr. Fizzwidget: "None taken, as a matter of fact, I agree with you and I'm sorry for any terrible impressions that he left on you and your friends about me." Ron: "That's fine, don't worry about that. We know now that you weren't anything like that." Angela: "I know he wasn't."

Kim and Ratchet stood by while everyone else left. Clank also stayed behind for a reason of his own. Kim: "Well, guess we should be leaving, too." Ratchet: "Sure."

They were about to walk out, but then suddenly, the Kimmunicator went off. She pulled it out. Wade: "Kim! Your dad wants to speak to you, he said it's urgent!" Kim: "Put him on now."

He switched over to Dr. Possible. Dr. P.: "Kim! Forget everything that I told you to do before! You must destroy the space station! I know what these men plan to do with it! They're planning to…no! What are you doing!? Stay away from me! AAAHHH!" Kim: "Dad!? Dad!" Voice: "Why, hello, Kim Possible, we meet at last." Kim: "Who are you!? Are you one of the men that paid my dad to build his space station!? What have you done to him!?" Voice: "Oh, nothing…yet. I can see that Dr. Possible broke his vow of silence and told you everything, well…everything that he knew anyway. It's a real pitiful shame that you didn't know what your father was like back in the day; so eager, so headstrong, so full of vigor and so very easy to manipulate." Kim: "What do you want with that space station!? What fiendish agenda do you have in mind!?" Voice: "Let's just say…we plan on making the Earth a perfect world by purging it of all its problems. We intended to offer your father and the rest of your family to become part of that new world, but he…wasn't very optimistic about the idea." Dr. P.: "No! Never! I would rather die than be part of your so called "perfect world". You intend to…"

Kim along with Ratchet and Clank listened in horror of Dr. Possible's screams of agony. Kim: "DAD!" Voice: "That's enough out of you, you insolent lap dog! Now then, Ms. Possible, we have a proposition for you. We are willing to offer you your father if you're to return the space station to this space center." Dr. P.: "Kim! Don't give in to their demands, they want to…"

They listened again to his screams. Voice: "I said keep your mouth shut! Ahem, now then, as I was saying, if you truly wish to see him alive again, return with the space station." Kim: "You monster! You won't get away with this!" Voice: "Return it to us and we will spare his life, but be sure that it is brought back completely unharmed. If we see so much as a single scratch on it, your father bites the big one."

The transmission was severed. Kim: "Dad! No! DAD!"

She tried to reestablish communications with her dad, but it was no use. Wade then reappeared on the Kimmunicator. Wade: "Kim, this is really bad! What do you think we should do? Kim? Kim? Kim!"

She was far too distraught from what just happened to even say anything. She fell to her knees and dropped both of her arms. Kim: "D-…dad…"

Ratchet, upset to see her like this, ran to her and grabbed her by her shirt with both hands and held her face close to his face. Ratchet: "Kimberly! Get a hold of yourself! I know things are dire, but you've got to snap out of it! Your dad needs this from you! Kimberly! KIMBERLY!" Kim: "No…my…my…dad…he…I can't…I…dad! He's…he's billions of…light years…away…and…I…I can't do…anything…to…I can't get to him…I don't know what to do…I'm…too far…away…to do…anything…about it! Please…someone…anyone…please help…help me…save my dad…!"

Ratchet was greatly shocked to see her like this. He then growled angrily, snatched the Kimmunicator from out of her hand and held it in front of him. Ratchet: "Wade! Are you still there!?" Wade: "Ratchet?" Ratchet: "Tell me, are there any other crime fighters from your home world besides Kimberly!? Anyone who can help Dr. Possible!?" Wade: "Well, there's Global Justice. There's also Team Go. I can also look into other crime fighters." Ratchet: "That's not going to be enough! These men that paid Dr. Possible to build his own space station are extremely dangerous. Kimberly is far too broken up from all of this to even think straight, let alone figure out what to do about this! No, we're going to need more help. Is there anyone who wants to owe her a favor?" Wade: "Lots of people. She's helped countless here on Earth. Every single one of them is always raring to pay her back however they can." Ratchet: "You think you're able to contact them?" Wade: "I can." Ratchet: "OK, then. Wade, I need you to send an important message to all those people that she has helped in the past: tell them that her dad needs help and if they hope to pay her back for everything she did for them, this is their chance to do so." Wade: "Got it! I'll get right on it." Ratchet: "Thank you, Wade. You're the best."

He deactivated the Kimmunicator. He then glanced at her in a sweet and caring manner then approached her again, kneeled in front of her and gently placed both of his hands on both sides of her head. Ratchet: "Kimberly. Everything's going to be OK. Wade is working on saving your dad as we speak. Don't worry, everything will be OK. I promise."

She pulled herself out of her distraught state for those few moments and looked at him, touched by his words. Kim: "Ratchet…"

They had their moment together. Clank took notice of this even though he was tending to his own tragedy. Ratchet: "Come on, let's get out of here."

They got themselves up. Kim: "Wait! What about Clank?"

They looked over and noticed Clank tending to the female bot that was badly damaged earlier. Kim and Ratchet looked at each other then went over towards Clank. Ratchet: "Hey, it's OK. I can fix her. I promise."

Clank looked up at him and smiled. Clank: "I know you can, considering that you have already fixed someone else."

Ratchet looked at Kim, she did the same with him and they both smiled.

[economicplus]

CORONAVIRUS Coronavirus: The month everything changed

CORONAVIRUS

Image copyright Getty Images/Alamy In the space of a month, the United Kingdom has transformed beyond recognition. And most of us haven't had time to stop and take stock. One Friday afternoon, when the UK was another country, a chalkboard leaned against the outside wall of a country pub. A message had been written in neat, thin capital letters. "Unfortunately a customer who visited us has tested positive for the coronavirus," it read. "So as a precautionary measure we are closing for a full deep clean." It was signed by the landlord and landlady, who apologised for the inconvenience. The pub was located along a quiet, narrow road just outside Haslemere in Surrey. The patient who had gone there lived somewhere in the county. Unlike previous British cases detected up to that point - he was the 20th - he hadn't been abroad recently. As far as anyone knew, he was the first to catch the virus inside the UK. On the same day, 28 February 2020, came another news update. A grimmer milestone. A British man who'd been infected on the Diamond Princess cruise ship became the first UK citizen to die, in Japan, from Covid-19. That afternoon, children were still in classrooms and adults were still at work. People shook hands and hugged and kissed. In the evening, they went to pubs and restaurants. Some went on dates and others visited elderly relatives. They assembled in groups and mingled with residents of other households. As the weekend went on, football fans crammed into stadiums. Worshippers gathered in churches, mosques, temples and synagogues. You could go outside for as long as you liked, if you didn't mind the rain. On supermarket shelves, toilet paper and paracetamol were plentiful. Recent storms had left large swathes of the country flooded, but for most British people, life went on as it always had and seemingly always would. Insofar as any of this describes a British way of life, though, it was one that ceased to exist entirely within just a few weeks.

Image copyright Getty Images The changes didn't happen smoothly, in steady, barely noticeable steps. Instead, the UK's sense of what was normal shifted in sudden movements, as though a ratchet was being yanked. On 28 February 2020 people in the UK were already taking notice of the outbreak. It would have been difficult to ignore entirely the headlines about what was happening in China, South Korea, Iran and Italy. The first confirmed cases among travellers returning to the UK had come as early as January, but it still seemed possible to regard this as something happening, for the most part, a long way away. Not every newspaper front page that Friday morning led with Covid-19 - the Daily Mail splashed on the saga of Harry and Meghan, the Daily Express with Brexit talks - but most did. In the final week of the month 442,675 phone calls were made to the non-emergency NHS line 111. People weren't yet panicking, but a generalised sense of low-level anxiety was everywhere. By 1 March, the virus had reached the four corners of the United Kingdom - cases had been detected in England, Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales. Two days later, with the total number at 51, Prime Minister Boris Johnson stood behind a lectern and launched the government's Coronavirus Action Plan. The outbreak was declared a "level four incident". Up to a fifth of the workforce might be off sick at its peak, the prime minister warned. Schools might have to close and large-scale gatherings be reduced. However seriously anyone took the warning, it was still difficult to visualise. The following day, a woman in her 70s with an underlying condition - those last four words soon became grimly familiar to anyone who followed news bulletins - became the first person to die inside the UK after testing positive for the virus. The first reports of hand sanitiser selling out in supermarkets were published. Each day the number of confirmed cases crept up - 115 by 5 March, 206 by 7 March, 273 by 8 March. On 11 March, the day that the World Health Organization declared a pandemic, Liverpool FC hosted Atletico Madrid - who were already playing their home games behind closed doors.

Image copyright Getty Images There were anxieties about whether it was a great idea to allow the 3,000 Spanish supporters to fly into a major British city where they would eat, drink, mingle and sleep. Anyone with plans to fly out of the UK was beginning to reconsider. Another twist of the ratchet was imminent. The following day, the government's Sage committee of scientific experts was shown revised modelling of the likely death toll. The figures, according to the Sunday Times, were "shattering". If nothing was done, there would be 510,000 deaths. Under the existing "mitigation" strategy - to shield the most vulnerable while letting everyone go about their business mostly as normal - there would be a quarter of a million. In a press conference, the prime minister told anyone with a continuous cough or a fever to self-isolate. His instruction came with a warning that "many more families are going to lose loved ones before their time". The bluntness was shocking. Some asked why, in that case, more wasn't being done. On Friday 13, the London Marathon, the Premier League and English Football League and May's local elections were all postponed. Scotland had its first coronavirus-related death. Saturday 14 and Sunday 15 March was the last relatively normal weekend. You couldn't watch league football but you could go to the pub. Hand sanitiser now wasn't to be found on any supermarket shelves, but you could tell your friends about your plans to practise "social distancing" if you met them on the street.

Around the country, people looked at Italy, France and Spain, which had already gone into lockdown, and wondered if the UK was next. Volunteers began forming mutual aid groups to deliver food and medicine to vulnerable people who were self-isolating. In person and on WhatsApp, families and groups of friends argued about what it all meant. The more anxious wondered why the British government was moving more cautiously than its counterparts on the continent. The more blasé complained about why they were going to all this bother. Wasn't it just a bit of flu? The latter sentiment was exactly the kind of thing the government's advisers were most worried about. On Monday 16, the prime minister advised against "non-essential" travel, urged people to avoid pubs and clubs and work from home. Across the country, kitchen tables were cleared to make way for laptops. Thanks to Skype and the virtual meetings app, Zoom, white-collar workers started getting a glimpse of their colleagues' interior decor. Those who couldn't do their jobs like this wondered how on Earth they were supposed to earn money and stay safe. On 17 March, the government began holding daily press conferences - events that would soon become regular viewing for nervous families. Just six days after presenting his budget, the Chancellor, Rishi Sunak, announced £300bn in loan guarantees - a huge expansion of state intervention in the economy by a Conservative government. There were still calls for more to be done to stop Britons infecting each other. The following day, most school pupils - those whose parents weren't designated key workers - were told they wouldn't go back to their classes until further notice. Exams, proms, farewells to classmates and teachers would now never happen. But although the UK had been told not to go to restaurants, cafes and pubs, many restaurants, cafes and pubs stayed open. They were quieter than usual but some customers still came. On the evening of Friday 20, the prime minister - who in a long career as a newspaper columnist had steadfastly demonstrated libertarian instincts - ordered restaurants, cafes and pubs to close, a measure that even in the darkest moments of World War Two would have been unthinkable. For much of the weekend that followed, there was bright sunshine, and people poured outside to take advantage of the last leisure option open to them. But when they crowded into parks and on to the summit of Snowdon they were seen - and widely condemned. This was not how "social distancing" - now regarded as everyone's social duty - was meant to operate.

The lockdown was coming. On Monday 23 at 20:30, the television screens showed the prime minister sitting behind a desk. He was about to announce some of the most draconian restrictions on individual liberty the UK had ever seen. You could only leave home to exercise once a day, travel to and from work when absolutely necessary and only go shopping for essential items. You had to stand two metres apart from people you didn't live with. You weren't to gather in public in groups bigger than two. The British people were being told to avoid human contact when they needed it most. All through the following week, people would look forward to their one state-sanctioned form of outdoor exercise a day. Or they would stand in front of their laptops, following the instructions set by the fitness coach, Joe Wicks.

Image copyright Getty Images By the time the weekend arrived, there were more than 537,000 confirmed cases in 175 countries. More than a quarter of all the people on the planet were living under some kind of restrictions in their social contact and movements. British life had been transformed so dramatically, and so fast, that you hadn't had time to dwell on it. On 28 February, London's Excel Centre had been hosting The Baby Show, "the UK's largest parenting event". A month later, the venue was a giant field hospital. This wasn't normal. Everything was described as "unprecedented" now, because it was. Speaking to the BBC's The World At One, historian Lord Peter Hennessy predicted that, in future, post-war Britain will be demarcated "BC and AC - before corona and after corona". Before 28 February, the UK was still widely portrayed as a place divided by Brexit, with younger, metropolitan Britons on one side, and their older counterparts in towns and the countryside on the other. That soon came to seem an anachronism. Elderly people were most at risk and those of working age, in the NHS and other key professions, were there to try and save them. Everyone was in this together.

The framing of political debate since 2016 seemed inadequate to the new reality. Coronavirus would not be defeated by a populist attack on the elites. More than ever, the UK needed experts to lead the way. But the experts needed the masses, too - if the vast majority of the population didn't act, then Covid-19 couldn't be stopped. Initially, the lockdown was supposed to last three weeks. But a month on from 28 February, the UK is settling in for the long haul, with the prime minister, the health secretary and the first in line to the throne all having tested positive for the virus. You remember your last trip to the gym, the last drink you had in a cafe or a pub, the last time you hugged your mum or your grandad. You think about the life you once took for granted. You wonder if it will ever return. Follow @mrjonkelly on Twitter Picture editor Emma Lynch Read the full article

[spockandawe]

So, Kaput.

You guys, I think we’re all out of good boys. There are no more good boys to be had. Because I’m pretty sure Kaput needs to join Terminus in gay baby jail.

Behind a cut for length.

And also let me start by saying that I love this. I didn’t have a way to get emotional purchase on him before and now I do. That being said. This is going to start from a suspicious place. He’s had little enough screen time that the build from zero to >:O wouldn’t be that satisfying. But my goodness do I have receipts to back me up.

Okay, so who even is this guy? Well, mostly we don’t know. He was around in the background here and there, heavy emphasis on background. But we do particularly see him show up in the text stories that go with Last Stand of the Wreckers. And there’s one especially interesting tidbit.

Kaput was the one who said Ironfist was a dead man walking, and he said made that call ‘too quickly for Ironfist’s liking’. Okay, not that suspicious, it’s totally understandable that Ironfist would be upset about this and not want to admit that he’s really truly dying a slow, inescapable death. But what do we hear later?

Um??

So that’s two doctors saying as sure as anything that they could have saved him. Not that there might have been a chance, they’re saying they could have done it. First Aid isn’t even technically a full doctor when we meet him on Delphi, he’s a nurse (just demoted because of the autobrand-examining fixation and the psych evaluation, but hey). And just look at the other injuries Ratchet repairs. Look at the scope of the war and the crazy injuries any medic would have been exposed to. Even if Kaput didn’t know how to do it, couldn’t he have sent the info to… any other doctor? Anyone?

This is an awfully suspicious call to make is all I’m saying.

Pure ridiculous speculation: Ironfist got that injury developing the cerebro-sensitive bullets. And when those were done, the ethics committee nixed them, saying it would be a war crime to use them in almost any situation. And we also hear about the Gideon’s Glue inquiry, where another horrifyingly deadly creation of Ironfist’s was somehow leaked to the Decepticons. We even see/hear about the aftereffects of that mess in the section with Rung and Flattop. Ironfist was right at the middle of these two projects, and when an accident happened, a doctor was like oh, yeah, you’re definitely dying, this is super untreatable.

I don’t want to say that someone told Kaput to let him die (especially if Brainstorm was doing design work at the same time and got off scot-free), but this is interesting and just begging for speculation to happen.

But! Back to canon. The first thing in the comic that Kaput does is roll on in and pick up Anode after Tailgate accidentally, uh, impales her. The first time we hear him speak is when she’s waking up.

You took her stuff? My first thought is that hey, not cool. My second thought is that no, if he’s going to operate on her, he’d need things to be out of the way, that’s fair. But look at his own words. It was a nasty wound, but localized. He was operating on her stomach. Why was it necessary to take things out of a compartment by her shoulder? And we don’t see anything to suggest he emptied those compartments conveniently right there for us to see on her hips. Mister doctor man, why are you meddling with your patient’s personal possessions?

(Especially when those possessions just so happen to tie conveniently to his own medical area of expertise and lead conveniently to exciting medical experiments involving the personal possessions he was meddling with)

Now, a lot of the Terminus meta meant looking at his words and actions outside the framing that made it so easy to see him as a decent guy. Then the bitterness and his controlling ways really show up. But even without context, Kaput is so nonthreatening and friendly and helpful. He spends all his time helping people! But let’s look at the way he just wedged himself RIGHT into the middle of the narrative.

For an awesome look at some of the thematic elements of the story and Kaput’s role in them, you should definitely check out the meta by @sunderedstar written here. It’s super interesting stuff. I’m less good for thematic analysis. I’m better at compiling discrete events and looking at them like hard data. So that link has storytelling and fairy tales. But what I’ve got is that when you pull the screencaps together, by LL07, Kaput has lodged himself in every single major thread of the plot we touch on.

(pedantic: except for the two whole panels worth of chromedome and rewind talking to rung)

He’s in the middle of the Anode (+Lug+Velocity+Nautica) tangle.

He’s most of what Brainstorm and Nightbeat talk about in their very brief appearance.

He’s at the center of the action with Ultra Magnus and the armor, which brushes up against the rest of the old ship officers.

And my goodness me is he involved with the Tailgate stuff.

Remember, this is a rando who we’ve barely even seen before LL02. Even Megatron didn’t invade every storyline quite that extensively when he joined the crew. And he’s Megatron. This is just… Some Guy.

But what’s weirdest is just how… central he is. Not just that he’s everywhere. But suddenly there are three urgent medical events, plus two minor ones, and they all go to him. There are piles of new mechs on this planet, and the only ones who get any attention at all in all of LL07 are Kaput and Fangry.

This is slightly out of order, but check out this panel again.

Nightbeat is brilliant. It’s his thing. And not only did Kaput beat him to the punch in terms of trying to decode the flowers, he landed on an answer before Nightbeat even started working on the problem. Brainstorm even calls it ‘stealing his thunder’. Kaput is seriously at the center of everything.

Anode grabs this random stranger and is immediately down for her one and only shot to try this complicated, tricky blacksmithing thing she’s never done successfully before. No prep, no getting to know you, just damn the torpedoes, full steam ahead. Which… is honestly pretty in-character for Anode :P

So this is the storyline where his presence is most understandable, and Velocity and Nautica staying out of the mix with the blacksmithing procedure is understandable too. But this is honestly the medical subplot where he has the least presence as a person. He does give Anode the feedback from the monitoring equipment, which is what she uses to adjust her blacksmith… thing, but not much past that.

Minimus Ambus, why are you bringing your armor problems to Kaput?

One, you’ve known Ratchet since forever. Two, Ratchet already has very thorough knowledge of how your armor works. Three, you were surprised he had this knowledge. Why are you going to Kaput over this?

This isn’t even a spark-related issue, your best guess is physical damage, why did you bring this to Kaput?

Um. And why are you so distressed at the idea that Kaput isn’t coming with you? Why are you pinning your hopes on him? You have two medics already. You have an impressively high medic concentration. Ratchet is an expert in everything, he’s demonstrated that he has longstanding knowledge of your armor, and you trusted him enough in MTMTE 40 to tell him about the little figurine that you thought was meant to mock you.

Yeah, this all is kind of… weird.

Kaput didn’t really do anything suspicious during the blacksmithing procedure. But first, from a narrative perspective, that was way too easy. Lug’s doing fine physically and mentally and she has most of her memories, and Anode patched things up on the trust/communication front right away? I don’t trust one tiny little bit that things are happily wrapped up on the Lug front. And also, oh my god, just look at that wording. Lug is doing improbably well? I’ve never seen anything that suspicious in my entire life (I love it).

Nautica, why are you bringing your eye problems to Kaput?

You also know two other medics. Who you have known for longer than him. One of them is the Chief Medical Officer and is an expert in all the things. And the other one you’ve been friends with for years and you just, just finished amica-marrying her. Why on earth are you bringing your medical problems to Kaput??

And also… her eye wasn’t injured, as far as the art went. Her face was injured, but her optic was always drawn looking intact.

So this is also pretty weird.

And now we’re in the land of incoherent. What on earth is even happening here. I guess armor… could be designed that way, if you really really wanted to, and put a lot of effort into developing a ‘personality sensor’.

But like, just look at those words. ‘Personality sensor’. That sounds ridiculous.

And this is a suit that has been worn by many people over the years, presumably people with different personalities. But. All of them have had to let their own personality be subsumed by the single continuous identity and legacy of ‘Ultra Magnus’. Designing this armor to require a strong, consistent sense of self sounds like the worst possible idea.

That’s apart from how everyone was in a long war, and folks have been getting screwed up left and right. Admittedly, Cybertronians have been a little slow to the punch with the whole mental health care thing. But shellshock, come on, people have been able to recognize at least some signs of PTSD for a long fricking time. The people wearing this armor. Are in a war. Where sufficient trauma can pretty severely screw up your mind, your sense of self, your conception of who you are.

Let’s make the armor dependent on being calibrated to sense one specific personality before it’ll work! That can only end well.

And anyways, I can’t see Ultra Magnus’s thing here as anything but unhealthy. Whatever was up with the armor, I don’t think an aggressive return to black-and-white thinking is at all healthy. He might be mobile now, but this isn’t good for him in the long run. He had a whole quiet personal crisis over this exact thing before, and now he’s being nudged in the opposite direction.

Also, Minimus Ambus thought there was a physical damage problem with his armor, and then Kaput comes right back and says that nooo no no it’s definitely personality-sensing magic. I mean science. I don’t know what to think, but I do think it’s suspicious that Kaput was examining the armor and then it stopped working even harder than before.

First, it worries me that Tailgate is putting blind faith in someone’s good intentions again. The Getaway thing is still pretty fresh. He and Cyclonus just had a mini-fight about Tailgate getting close to other people when Tailgate was trying to push him away. But then he turns right around and trusts Kaput just like that.

(Given his responses when he’s told about the dangers of this treatment, I do bet it’s at least partially because he’ll do anything to fix this problem, so he stops being a danger to Cyclonus. But he also is prone to thinking the best of people, and it’s come back to bite him multiple times)

Wait, what?

Okay, Cyclonus coming to Kaput to tell him about Tailgate, and telling him to treat Tailgate’s injuries, that makes sense.

But Cyclonus told Kaput that Tailgate had an abnormal spark?

First of all, the super strength originated with a traumatic event. The other people affected by the spark spasm suffered eventual negative side effects. It only makes sense that mister epicenter here would eventually have some problems of his own.

Cyclonus said it was like Tailgate was trying to claw out his own spark, but that doesn’t exactly match these words. Blaming an abnormal spark… the connotations of ‘abnormal’ make this sound more like a birth defect. Not a recent development. And Cyclonus is usually very good about deferring to experts and trusting their experience and knowledge in their own field. We just saw that last issue with Brainstorm. He handed off Killmaster’s wand, said ‘I’m sure you can figure this out’, and… trusted him to figure it out. This doesn’t sound like him.

I am a fan of fixing up Tailgate, but wow, what a convenient, immediate offer of a solution. Buddy, you haven’t even examined the guy yet, there’s no evidence you read Velocity’s reports on the original issue, and I don’t trust you at all when you talk about Cyclonus saying it was totally this thing, this is definitely what’s wrong. You haven’t even looked at him and you’re saying ‘hey, check out this convenient offer of assistance!’

I don’t trust you.

You haven’t even examined him yet and you’re talking about depowering his spark? A potentially fatal procedure? When you haven’t even looked at him?

And also you just said you might be able to find a solution, but now the solution is totally to depower his spark? You’re moving the goalposts so fast that I missed that completely on the first writeup of this meta.

Oh look, Kaput hasn’t told Tailgate anything about what’s going to be done to him.

Also, “inescapable.” So much D:

More things Kaput never mentioned to Tailgate.

Oh my god, he didn’t even tell Tailgate how long the procedure is supposed to take.

Moments before you enter this impenetrable box that is barely larger than you, let me just tell you that you’re going to be stuck in there for six solid months with no food, no nothing. Just you. Alone.

I also didn’t tell you about the slow painful death part until after I built your underground radiation coffin

Good lord, that wouldn’t be comfortable for a day, never mind six months. Why not build it large enough for like. A bed and a chair? Space to stand?? This is creepy, bro.

Oh my god, he never even told Tailgate whether or not he’d be able to talk to anyone for those six solid months.

I’m not happy about the situation Fangry sets up for Tailgate here. However, I am also not terribly distraught to see Kaput’s decapitated body.

But for the last bit of medical sleaziness, look at Kaput just casually leaking patient info to some rando who wandered into his office and decided to cozy up to him.

I pretty much understood what Terminus was aiming for, once I went back and reread. I am totally lost when it comes to Kaput, but wow do I not trust him.

And I don’t trust that he’s gone either.

Kaput told Anode some weird stuff about how there can be bleedover between a spark and a brain. Kaput’s brain is… nominally gone.

But you know, it’s remarkable. It’s like I can remember something from the long long ago days….. Almost like a few issues into MTMTE we met a doctor who seemed like a decent guy at first, then turned out to be extremely not-decent. It’s almost like we saw that doctor very-probably die. And then he came back later and he very-probably died again, this time complete with a missing head.

Lemme just--

Hm.

We see Rung, Red Alert, Metroplex, Whirl, and (it’s gonna happen) Pharma surviving having their heads blown up, or their brain modules severed from their spark for a period of time. Whirl survives the soft termination in the holiday special. Windblade took Metroplex’s brain on an adventure without worrying that he was going to die right away. We hear Cyclonus reference Rossum’s rule of thirds, which seems to tie back to how long a spark can survive while being severed.

Kaput worked in a research facility where they did theoretical work, but also developed new technology for use in the war. He worked alongside Brainstorm, mister mad science. He’s a spark specialist, he’s a medic, and it’s extremely speculative (but also extremely plausible) that he tried some things out on himself. Things like maybe a built in emergency spark support system. Or relocating his brain module from that obvious, vulnerable head down into somewhere in his more-shielded torso.

And now, let’s get silly and speculative about writing techniques, because it’s fun and I live for this kind of thing is why

All covered by the end of season one (except the Brainstorm thing that got cut off), pretty straightforward once you know how the story goes. But now. For fun. Recalibrate to look at the time-traveling warning message in terms of where the Lost Light at the end of season two stood before everything went to hell.

Abort the mission. Do not leave Cybertron. - Or, abort the mission, don’t leave the Lost Light?

Don’t open the coffin. - Don’t open the Necrobot’s pods?

Don’t let them take Skids. - I’m snickering, but I feel very bad about it

Don’t go to Delphi – Random chill side quest to another planet early in the story that goes right to hell? So... don’t go to functionist!Cybertron? (we even learn that Tarn Glitch lives there)

Do not—I repeat do not—look in the basement – Don’t look in the basement… of the planet? :DDD

And for the sake of the Cybertronian race itself, don’t trust Brainstorm – You know, I left this off at first, since it didn’t show up in the original issue one message. But given Nightbeat’s joking comment about Brainstorm breaking the rules of science. I’m just going to slip this in here too. Brainstorm accidentally an alternate dystopian timeline, I am sure he can find even more havoc to wreak. He broke the space-time continuum, maybe he can break physics next!

I’ll freely admit that I love to play with conspiracy theories, and I sure know how to stretch a point, but this really took less stretching than I thought it would to make it fit. Plus I am very suspicious of how similarly Kaput and Pharma make their entrances into the story. Oh hey actually, you know what, the Delphi arc was also when Tailgate and Cyclonus had their first big clash, and it ended with Cyclonus hitting him, kicking him, and leaving. And this time, Cyclonus was the one on the defensive, and Tailgate made him leave :’) Just noticed that. But also look at this panel from after time traveling Tailgate leaves a time traveling voicemail.

Every one of those bad things they tried to warn about had a net positive outcome. Season one and season two of MTMTE also started off with a giant pileup of everything happens so much, but there are always things that are terrible in the moment, but play critical positive roles in the future. The winning conditions in the future wouldn’t be possible without the disasters of the past, and the big climaxes in this story are always wonderfully crafted. So I spent a lot of the early comic being disoriented and confused, but history does suggest that this story foundation being laid out now is going to make for a glorious whole.

But back to Kaput! Basically I trust him about as far as I can throw him (and he is a unicycle man who is two stories tall), and I also am extremely skeptical about him being dead. It’s driving me crazy that I can’t tell what on earth he was up to. The way the narrative distorted around him was bizarre, and I want to know what he’s trying to accomplish. Terminus was friendly and affable in company, until he decided to start being a dick in private. There have been plenty of assholes in the Autobot ranks. There’s no reason to believe other people who came out of the pods aren’t also controlling users who know how to keep up a good public face. Especially with the Pharma parallels, I am very unwilling to believe this is Kaput’s real face. I’m dying to know more, because I sure don’t trust what he shows us on the page.

[anonymous-human]

Ah, sure! Sorry about that. How about... Rung, Ratchet, Rodimus, Megatron, Swerve, First Aid, and Ultra Magnus?

(I’m like 80% sure they spoke English on the LL, but I could be wrong. I mean, the con’s would not have spoken English on Earth in the old cartoon if they didn’t. Usually, in 80’s cartoons, Aliens would be speaking a different language if they didn’t know English. But I’m just theorizing! I’m not good at First Aid since i don’t know his character, so sorry about that! Also, sorry for the lateness! this goes for everyone’s requests! it might take a day or two but I promise I’m working on them! I’ve just gotten busy all of a sudden. it’s alright, though.)

Rung

When he catches you singing alone, he just staying outside the door and smiles to himself. He loves your voice! He’ll leave early, but on nights where he can’t sleep, he’ll ask if you can sing. He’s embarrassed about it, but he sucks up his pride just to hear your hidden talent.

Red alert. He told him. He tells him everything. But when Rung was first told, he didn’t entirely believe it. He found it kinda silly, but still listen to what red had to say.

So he asked if you wanted to have a small date in his office, of course, you accepted, but when rung told had Red was talking about you, you felt your sweat drop. Looks like you disabled the camera too late. When he was done explaining the whole human thing, you put your hands up and admitted. It was going to have to be said sometime, right?

He asked if he could see you- the real you, in which you obliged. When you crawled out in your shorts and tank top, he seemed emotionless behind his glasses, but really he was just shocked and a little excited.

You looked kinda really cute. Having you been one of the first humans he has met, at least.

He’s not mad, actually, it’s kinda like holomatter and cybertronians, except you have a metal suite. He’s an accepting person, so yeah, he’ll date a cybertronian who is just a human in a suit. :)

It’s weird and exciting! He’s really excited to see how it pulls through for both of you.

Ratchet

Like Rung, when he catches you singing alone, he just staying outside the door and smiles to himself. He will leave early though, he has work to do.

When you scratch your armor, he just guessed you had been hiding on earth for much too long, giving you human habits.

He didn’t guess you were actually a full blown human in a metal suit.

When he found out, you must’ve lost power after a few too many days without refueling. The thing is you were stuck in the doorway of the med bay, and you couldn’t move. And the backup open in this situation was dumbly put on the outside of the suite.

“Ratchet!” you called out. The microphone wasn’t working, so you needed to practically scream if he was going to hear you through the metal. You leaned up against the front side of the suit. It was nighttime for them, so First Aid and Ambulon were most likely asleep. Ratchet as well. Lucky for you, he had some data pads to go through, so when he heard you, he finally decided to persist on what the hell you needed at this time.

“Do you need me right this second?! Y/n, I’m-” he was cut off by the scene in front of him. When he saw the cold dark eye’s in the suit were off, he became horrified and confused. Your cybertronian body was offline, yet he still heard you calling his name.

You told him there was a panel he needed to open on the front, and a big, red, flashy button he needed to push. When he found the button.

He must have found the button, because the front of the cockpit quickly popped outward, kinda like a sideways parachute, you along with it.

You hit the floor with a grunt and gasped as the cold air hit your arms and legs.

“Primus, do you guys have a built-in heat system?” you complained as you rubbed your arms. It had been the first time out of your suit while not in your hab.

When you finally looked up at the medic, his emotions were mixed. He was angry because he was courting a fragging human, he was freaked out because his s/o was a fragging human, and yet he was emotionless. He quickly came to the assumption he was dreaming or hallucinating from his old age or lack of sleep and Energon.

He just looked down at you, then he looked at the suite, then back at you.

“You’re… you’re human?” he was definitely shocked.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Ratch.”

After this whole scenario, he left to think through his actions, rethink his life. I mean, yeah, it made total sense now but… why?

He needs a drink for this.

After some time with you, he warmed up to the fact your human, he keeps it a secret too, if that’s your plan.

He’s okay with it actually. It just means he can hold you in his hand and he can hold your giant cyber hand.

Rodimus

When he caught you singing he listened for a bit. If it was a song he knew he’s gonna sing with you.

He found out you were human when he ‘flamed out’, burning your metal suit so it metal was really hot from the flames and heated up on the inside, long longer suitable for a human such as yourself to wear.

You dashed back to your hab to get out until the heat chilled. They didn’t need you right this second, did they?

The thing is your pants got caught on the hot metal and you were stuck as you struggled for freedom of the burning metal.

Rodimus happened to walk in as you were hanging from your pant leg.

He froze.

Of course, you hadn’t told him you were human! You had the idea in your head Rodimus would tell the crew your secret.

The SECOND thing I should mention is that he came in with Drift behind him. And now you were haNGING FROM THE END OF ONE OF HIS SWORDS. DRIFT, BUDD, IT’S ME HOLY SHI-

Anyway, Rodimus initially thought you had killed his conjunx, but when he noticed the cockpit in your giant cybertronian suit, it all made sense to him.

How you knew so much about the earth, the references, your habits!

They were all human! But why would you hide in a metal suit?

You told him you did it because that way you could eat the rohot pussy ((shaddup anon)) you could blend in easier. You weren’t some sort of assassin, just didn’t think cybertronians liked humans.

And what were you supposed to do? You were already in too deep in. “I’m sorry for not telling you.” you apologized. You told him you’d be cool if he wanted to break up with you.

Are you fragging serious?! No way! This is too cool!

He says you look cute as a human, and shouldn’t wear the metal suit all the time!

Megatron

When he catches you singing, he doesn’t know the song (he likes old-before-the-war songs), but he likes your voice.

In his writings, he writes about how he regrets killing the thousands of millions of human lives he destroyed. He tells you how he wishes he could apologize to them or go back in time and stop himself.

“I forgive you,” you said as you were with him alone together in his quarters. You mentally smacked yourself upside the head. When you said that. Well, you obviously did forgive him. You were in a red relationship with the ex-tyrant.

He was confused by what you meant then, but when he found out, he looked horrified. (I don’t know how you tell him, use the imagination i don’t have!). You. a human being. From earth. Who survived his destruction. Who watched as he killed many of your own kind. Forgave him.

He broke down if and when you two were in private. He would completely lose posture he would lift you up in shaking servos. He would apologize over and over.

“It’s alright.” you would tell him as you rubbed his helm. “It’s all over now.” but it wasn’t. He was still feared everywhere he went.

He vowed to himself he would love a protect you for the rest of your short, sad life.

If you tell the crew, he lets you sit on his shoulder or hands for mobility. Big-bucket-head-bodyguard-boyfriend. It’s awesome.

Swerve

Can i just say right now, since you don’t actually drink the Energon you have your suit drink, SO, you can win a drinking contest?

If your suit makes you look like a bigger bot like Skids or Rodimus, which I imagine you would, he’s all about that life™.

When he catches you singing, like Rodimus, if he knows the song, he’ll join you. It’s all fun.

Whether you tell him you’ve ‘visited’ earth or not is up to you though.  

If you do tell him, he would be ecstatic! He’s never been there before! What was it like?  The next time you plan on going, can you bring me with? please?!

He’s really excited.

Instead of catching you out of your suite, the walking talking about how cool it would be too. So, despite it being the dumbest idea that could destroy your relationship, you took a chance. you would have to tell him someday, anyway.

You planned to tell him on his creation day and to lead him to your hab and get out of the cockpit when he was ready.

It went smoothly. You lead him there, letting him in first and walking in with him, locking the door so there would be no interruptions.

“Are you ready? This… this may be a shock to you.” you said, nervously rubbing your servos together. He nodded, Yeah! Yeah! Show me already!”

You, not ready yourself took a deep inhale and a long exhale. You flip some switches in order to power down the suit and the engine stops. You take off your gloves and helmet. You push some cords back and you pop open the front of the cockpit. You climb down and look up at the red and white mech before you.

Swerve is speechless. Well, not entirely. In the first 5 seconds, he was quiet. Then he tried to put together words as he spoke, but they came out and gibberish. He looked like he was about to faint.

“H-hey- hey, hey. Calm down,” you said, putting your hands up, trying to keep his attention so he literally wouldn’t faint. Can cybertronians faint?

“… but! asd-HOW?!” he tried to ask. He was going through shock city and was slowly coming back. You explained to him cybertronians were so advanced, you were curious HOW advanced, so you disguised yourself in a giant metal suit to blend in.

“If you want to break off the relationship, I’m chill with it.” you said, you avoided eye contact as you said that.

“Are you serious?” he said, a grin spreading across his faceplate. “This is awesome!your awesome! Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

He’s really happy actually! Well, for one thing, he isn’t the smallest anymore. And Another thing is HE’S EARTH DATING A HUMAN. He’s the happiest camper.

Once you’re ready to tell the rest of your friends, you’ll let him tell, he’s lit.

Ultra Magnus

He loves music, and he’s no stranger to human music. So when he catches you singing, he stops and stares, not wanting to disturb you. It was obviously an earth song, not recognizable to him, but he was enjoying your voice anyway.

When you finally see him, you gasp! He quickly gets embarrassed and apologized, turning around out of your hab, down the hall… out the airlock, he goes. Not really, but when he’s embarrassed he regrets like no tomorrow.

You had thought he was going to pull another all-nighter, so you got out of your metal armor to stretch after a long, long day.

Yet, you miss judged the timing, and you fell asleep on your berth.

You woke up to Magnus just looking between you and your suite.

He doesn’t understand what he’s witnessing until you explain, and in the end, he reveals to you his own secret to you as well.

Your giant metal suit buddies.