#made me so excited to create again and reignited my love for it

[theghostofashton]

.

[dancinglikebutterflywings]

Art Class | Hwang Hyunjin

Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin x Reader

Request: from @iamasimpfor2dcharachers

Synopsis: When Hyunjin moved to Paris in a desperate attempt to find his inspiration, he didn't expect to find it in the form of a person he would meet in an art class he signed up for.

Warnings: Feelings of lack of motivation, inspiration.

Word Count: 672

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Likes, Comments & Reblogs are welcomed and appreciated. 

Hyunjin took a seat at an empty easel, feeling unsure about what to expect from this art class he signed up for. Despite his natural talent for painting and sketching, he had never enrolled in an art class before. His passion for the art world had always fueled his creativity, but lately, he felt unmotivated and uninspired. His work seemed forced and lacked the spark it once had.  

After confiding in his friend Chan, Hyunjin decided not to give up on art. Instead, he made the bold choice to move to Paris in search of renewed inspiration. Now, two weeks into his new adventure, he sat in an art class, hoping to reignite his passion. 

As he settled into his seat at the easel, he couldn't help but feel a surge of excitement mixed with nervousness. The art class in Paris is a far cry from his usual routine back home, but he knew that this was exactly what he needed to break free from the creative rut he’d been stuck in. 

The initial excitement faded into annoyance as he obediently followed the art instructor's instructions. The enthusiasm he felt for this painting class began to disappear as he struggled to blend the colors on his canvas. 

"You can paint whatever your heart desires," a gentle voice broke through the instructor’s monotone voice.  

He looked to his side to find a woman around his age said, her eyes shifting between the mishmash of colors on his canvas and him.  

He turns to her and asks, "What if I don't feel any desire in my heart at the moment?"  

She smiles and replies, "I'm just suggesting that you don't have to paint exactly what the teacher wants us to paint." With that, she returns her attention to her own artwork.  

Hyunjin seizes the opportunity to steal a quick glance at her painting. He finds himself puzzled by the chaotic blend of blues, greens, and yellows that adorn her canvas. 

He looks back at her, finding her completely lost in her painting. He can't help but feel a sense of awe and admiration for her. The way she paints with grace and confidence, completely in her element, is mesmerizing to him. 

Suddenly, the annoyance melts away, and is replaced by a surge of inspiration. He turns back to his canvas and starts painting again, this time taking her advice into consideration. His brush moves with a newfound purpose. Each stroke, he tries to capture the warmth in her eyes and the curve of her smile.  

The colors on his palette blend effortlessly to create a portrait that mirrored the beauty he saw before him.  

He was so engrossed in his painting that he barely heard the instructor announcing that they had five minutes to clean up and leave.  

As he started tidying up, he suddenly realized that he never got the woman's name. "Excuse me," he called out, catching her attention before she could walk away. She turned towards him, wearing the same friendly smile as before. "I never got your name."  

"I'm Y/N," she introduced herself, extending her hand towards him.  

"I'm Hyunjin," he replied, shaking her hand and giving a slight bow.  

"It was nice to meet you, Hyunjin," she said. "Will you be here for the next class?"  

"Will you be here?" he asked, hesitating to answer, unsure of his own plans.  

She shook her head, her smile faltering slightly. "I have a wedding to attend next Friday."  

"Would you like to grab coffee sometime?" he asked, hopeful.  

Her smile brightened once again. "I would love to. Is tomorrow at 10am good for you?"  

He nodded, his own smile growing wider. "At the café downstairs?"  

She nodded in agreement. "I'll see you then." She went to leave but turned back to him. "I'm glad you've found something that your heart desires," she said. "Whatever it is, I hope you continue to feel inspired to paint it."  

Before he could respond or show her his painting, she leaves the small art studio. 

©️ 2024 CRAZYFORMFICS. NO ONE HAS PERMISSION TO COPY, TRANSLATE AND/OR REPOST MY WORKS ON HERE OR ANY OTHER SITE.

TAGGED: @staytiny2000 - @dancelikebutterflywings - @kpopmenace143 - @treehouse-mouse - @alexxavicry - @jedi-dreea - @rainydayteacups - @tinyelfperson - @yeonjunnie - @laylasbunbunny - @skz1-4-3 - @pinkies-things

©️ 2024 CRAZYFORMFICS. NO ONE HAS PERMISSION TO COPY, TRANSLATE AND/OR REPOST MY WORKS ON HERE OR ANY OTHER SITE.

[normal-enderman]

I left these tags on another dsmp post but I want to elaborate on it more

I think these NPCs could also be representatives of the audience. Just like how the dsmp audience all had differing opinions, access to different information from different sources, and took different sides, so too did the inhabitants of the dsmp world. There was even a trend back in the dsmp era where people were making dsmp-sonas (I made one).

To explain better how I think these NPCs fit into the dsmp's history, I need to expand on my headcanons regarding the world as a whole a little more

In my headcanon, the DreamSMP is a "new world" - people who are on the down and out hear of this mysterious figure called Dream, along with his friends, who is inviting people to join this new land he - discovered? Why is it considered his? Did he come from the land in the first place? Does he have a right to it, or was he just the first to make a claim to it? (Did he create it?) No-one is really sure, but the invite has been made, and slowly, people searching for adventure, for a new life and a new start, begin to trickle in to this new world.

Meanwhile, Wilbur, Tommy and Tubbo aren't living with Phil - Will wanted to set out and be his own person, and being the irresponsible arse that he is, convinced his two younger brothers what a wonderful adventure it would be to sneak out and be their own people without Phil on their case. In truth, Will's relationship with Phil was strained to breaking point when Wilbur left - Will wanted to be a politician and change the world, and Phil didn't want to get involved. But Wilbur successfully hid from Tommy and Tubbo that this was why he wanted to leave - he wrapped it up in dreams and positive words, until Tommy and Tubbo were excited to come along. For the past year, they have been living in poverty - happy, but Wilbur isn't really responsible enough to properly raise and take care of his brothers.

When Wil hears about Dream's world, his dreams and ambitions are reignited, and he sets off to check it out - but while there he encounters Sally, a woman who he had a fling, with who has also travelled to the new world, and discovers he has a son. Being an irresponsible arse, he immediately becomes more interested by this new development than he is getting back to Tommy and Tubbo, trusting them to take care of themselves for a bit. After a month has passed and Wilbur hasn't returned, Tubbo and Tommy decide to set out by themselves to reunite with him in the new world.

So. Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur, as well as a small but steadily increasing number of NPCs and other player characters, arrive in Dream's new world.

The key word here is new.

They have nothing.

This is why Wilbur gains the support of not just the other players, but also the NPCs: he sets up a rudimentary 'country' (read: infrastructure) that allows people to have some security and resources. People side with him because they want to be able to make their own decisions about how to live in and develop the new world, and Dream is being increasingly controlling.

This is what makes the NPC idea add a whole new layer of depth to the dsmp story for me. I love imagining how the normal citizens get resources and build infrastructure, and how they have to build a new, functioning society completely from scratch.

In Manberg and New L'Manberg, they had enough infrastructure to have newspaper publications, permanent housing, and shops. That was probably them most developed and unified the new world ever got. After New L'Manberg is destroyed, everything is completely broken down and refugees are forced to flee from the country with absolutely nothing. Their choices are to either start from scratch again or join one of the factions vying for power following the fall of New L'Manberg. They don't even have a stable food supply, many of them are starving or forced to steal or scrounge for food and equipment.

Anyway, no-one else remembers Tubbo's beetroot farm stream that he did with Foolish. I do. That stream was important to my little headcanon about the NPCs of the dsmp. The beetroot farm was a communal food source to help refugees, while simultaneously according Tubbo a lot of power in the form of NPCs who relied on him and who he was helping, and who would in turn support Snowchester.

[dc-and-arfrona]

Birthday Wishes

—-

Jason Todd x GN!Reader

Type: Angst/Fluff

Word Count: 1.2k+

Masterlist

Summary: He forgot it was your birthday : ( 

— It was a bright and sunny day in Gotham City, and you were eagerly awaiting the arrival of your birthday. As the clock ticked closer to midnight, you couldn't help but feel a little excited. You had dropped hints here and there, subtly reminding Jason of the impending special day. After all, you had been together for quite some time now, and he knew how much your birthday meant to you.The night before your birthday, Jason had been out on a particularly intense mission. He had taken down a group of heavily armed criminals, preventing a potential catastrophe. Exhausted from the fight, he returned home just as the sun began to rise. However, the fatigue had taken its toll on him, causing him to fall into a deep sleep as soon as he hit the bed.As the day dawned, you woke up with a hopeful smile, eagerly anticipating the surprises Jason had planned for you.

 You tiptoed into the kitchen, expecting to see a table adorned with breakfast treats and presents, but to your dismay, it was empty. Confusion mixed with disappointment filled your heart.Hours passed, and with each passing minute, your disappointment turned into sadness. Doubts began to creep in, wondering if Jason had actually forgotten your birthday. 

Trying to push those negative thoughts away, you decided to confront him about it.You made your way to the training room, where you knew Jason would be found. The sound of clashing metal and grunts of effort filled the room as you stepped in. Jason's focus was entirely on the targets in front of him, his concentration unbreakable."Jason," you called out, your voice barely above a whisper. He didn't respond, his movements precise and lethal. "Jason!" you tried again, this time a little louder.Startled, Jason paused, turning to face you.

 Beads of sweat dripped down his forehead, and he looked at you with a mix of surprise and concern. "Hey, what's wrong?" he asked, his voice laced with genuine worry.Taking a deep breath, you tried to steady your emotions. "Do you... Do you remember what today is?" you asked, your voice barely audible.

Jason's eyes widened, realization dawning on him. He had completely forgotten, and the realization hit him like a punch to the gut. "Oh no," he muttered, his voice filled with regret. "I'm so sorry, Y/N. I can't believe I forgot."Tears welled up in your eyes, a mixture of hurt and disappointment. "I thought... I thought you cared," you whispered, your voice trembling.Jason approached you, his hand reaching out to cup your cheek. "No, Y/N, it's not like that. I do care, more than you could ever imagine," he said, his voice filled with sincerity. "I messed up, and I'm truly sorry. I'll make it up to you, I promise."

You sniffled, your heart aching for his touch, despite the hurt. "How can you make it up to me?" you asked, your voice tinged with doubt.A determined look crossed Jason's face as he met your gaze. "Let's start by canceling everything I had planned for the day," he said. "We'll spend the whole day together, doing whatever you want. Just tell me, and I'll make it happen."

You couldn't help but feel a glimmer of hope and a flicker of love reigniting within you. Despite his forgetfulness, Jason's genuine remorse and determination to make it right reminded you why you fell in love with him in the first place.With a small smile, you wiped away your tears and took his hand. 

"Okay, Jason. Let's start with a simple breakfast together," you suggested. "No missions, no distractions. Just you and me, celebrating my birthday."And with that, the two of you left the training room, ready to embark on a day of reconnection and love, hoping to create new memories that would overshadow the forgotten birthday, reminding you both of the strength of your bond.

The morning sun glistened upon the tranquil waters as Jason drove the two of you towards the beach. The tension from the previous day's disappointment began to dissipate with each passing mile. Sitting beside him, you couldn't help but feel a mix of anticipation and curiosity. What had Jason planned to make your day special?

As the car came to a stop, you stepped out onto the sandy shore, a gentle breeze tousling your hair. The salty aroma of the sea filled the air, evoking memories of carefree days spent beneath the warm sun. You turned to face Jason, a question forming on your lips, but before you could speak, he reached into a bag and pulled out a brightly colored beach towel.

"Close your eyes," he said with a mischievous grin. "I have a surprise for you."

Intrigued, you obliged and shut your eyes tightly, your heart pounding in anticipation. The sound of footsteps and the rustling of the bag filled the silence as Jason set up the towel behind you. You felt his warm hand on your shoulder, guiding you gently backward until your legs touched the soft fabric.

"Okay, you can open your eyes now," Jason whispered.

Slowly, you unveiled your eyes, and as the world came into focus, a beautiful scene unfolded before you. Colorful umbrellas dotted the shoreline, and a picnic basket overflowing with your favorite snacks beckoned from the towel. Jason had created a cozy oasis, just for the two of you.

A wide smile spread across your face, your heart swelling with joy. "Jason, this is amazing," you said, your voice filled with genuine appreciation.

He beamed, relief washing over him as he saw your delighted reaction. "I wanted to make today everything you deserve," he replied, his voice tender.

You settled down on the towel together, basking in the warmth of the sun and the comfort of each other's presence. The sound of crashing waves provided a soothing backdrop as you indulged in the delicious treats Jason had prepared.

As the day progressed, laughter filled the air as you engaged in friendly competitions building sandcastles, taking romantic walks along the water's edge, and enjoying refreshing dips in the ocean. Jason had gone above and beyond to create a day full of joy and adventure, and you couldn't have asked for anything more.

As the sun began its descent, casting vibrant hues across the sky, you found yourselves nestled together on the beach towel, watching the mesmerizing beauty unfold. The day had been a perfect blend of serenity, romance, and reconnection.

"I'm so sorry for forgetting your birthday, Y/N," Jason said, his voice tinged with regret. "But I hope today shows you how much you mean to me."

You turned to him, your eyes filled with love and forgiveness. "Jason, today has been incredible. It's not about the presents or the grand gestures; it's about the effort, the love, and the memories we create together," you replied, your voice filled with sincerity. "And today, you've given me all of that and more."

With a gentle touch, Jason brushed a strand of hair behind your ear, his eyes locked with yours. "I promise to cherish every moment we have together, to remember the little things that matter to you," he vowed.

And in that tender moment, as the sky painted a masterpiece above, you both understood that love was about more than just remembering birthdays—it was about the genuine effort, understanding, and growth that came from overcoming challenges together.

Wrapped in each other's arms, you watched the sun bid farewell to the day, knowing that your love had grown stronger, and that tomorrow held countless new memories waiting to be created.

[thxrnking]

What brought me here...

In my previous fandom before this I had a vast ongoing fanfic project (think 200,000+ words) that used to have me writing a little bit everyday but after some time, friends found other things they wanted to read and talk about. One friend accused me of trying to manipulate people and this caused me to overthink everything I said afterward as I didn't want to manipulate my friends, and eventually everyone stopped posting in the discord I made and stopped talking to me.

I tried to keep writing but over the course of a year, I got 5 responses, 2 were positive, the other 3 were people asking to be removed from the tag list because they were no longer part of the fandom or because their ex introduced them to my stories and their breakup had gone bad and they wanted nothing more to do with my works.

For nearly two years I limped along trying to keep it going, trying to diversify my writing, creating new projects just desperate to feel the joy it used to give me. Nothing was working.

When I found this fandom (Just Dance) I was scared; terrified to even interact with anyone. What if the same thing happened again? I lurked for a good few weeks, reading and watching people in the fandom before I finally realised I actually wanted to write for it. So I made a new blog, a new AO3 and I wrote. I watched others talk and interact and let's just say being a part of the fandom (even if I was mostly on the fringes of it) made me feel so good about not only myself but the things I'd lost the drive for.

Friends. Fandom. Writing. Everything that had been slowly dragging me into a deep depression was giving me life again.

The other day I was talking with My Moon and they reminded me of an old fic I had been writing that I hadn't thought about in years. One that I had quickly lost motivation for when the person I had been writing it for stopped talking to me. Instead of the dread the thought of it used to give me, I felt excited. I re-read what I had so far and even found my original half-plan for it. And while I remembered why I'd stopped writing it (why I'd stopped writing a lot of my favourite things) it didn't scare me anymore.

Yesterday I opened my old tumblr for the first time in over eight months. I changed the picture, updated the theme, trimmed out some old posts and honestly, I love it. I'm finally ready to continue with this old project (alongside my Just Dance fics of course).

Basically Just Dance fandom, I wanted to thank you.

When I found you, I was a husk. I was exhausted. I was bruised and scarred and you provided a loving, creative, beautiful space where I was able to find joy in something I'd grown to hate. You've shown me there are still good people out there beyond all the people I lost touch with. Seeing all the ideas and thoughts and creativities of such a still blossoming fandom has reignited me.

I hope every last one of you who reads this knows, whether we ever crossed paths or not, you are fantastic and should give yourselves more credit.

[krphub]

hi krphub! this is the main admin of iconic and I want to express my gratitude for everyone's interest. i apologize for the issues and the radio silence, so I'd like to explain a few things and give updates!

warning: this may be a long read.

iconic started and was created entirely with one admin. (note: thank you to the 3 others that volunteered later, it was thoroughly appreciated and they contributed a lot to ideas post opening!). it was essentially one person handling coding, writing, posting ads, and making edits to get the blog going and i thoroughly appreciated all the love and interest iconic received even before its official opening!

currently, we're considering creating a new blog, but we lost crucial elements from the iconic explanation blogs, in terms of layouts and the final versions of explanations of iconic's features. making the blog and getting everything done took a really long time so i was so excited to get things going but with the blog facing so many issues (shadow-bans and now deletion amongst other things) without even opening and having to redo everything again, it has slightly stifled my motivation and excitement (on top of having real-life priorities and commitments that got in the way) which is why updates and progress with the new blog has been very very slow. being an admin in general is quite difficult so for all that hard-work to be deleted in an instance, for no reason, is quite disheartening and made me hesitate about redoing it all.

truthfully, i was hoping to hear back from tumblr with good news but it's not looking good so starting from scratch in terms of setup seems likely. i do have the reservation list but if we proceed with the new blog, reservations would need to be redone, as we lack access to private passwords for verification. if possible, i'd love to gauge the interest in iconic's revival with all these things considered, and if there's enough, i will happily discuss the next steps with the rest of the admin team.

thank you for your continued interest and support; it warms my heart to know people are waiting for us with genuine interest. if there is enough interest, then i'd be more than happy to set up again but i just ask for patience and understanding as it means starting from the beginning, which also means it might take some time to get back into the swing of things.

thank you for reading this and i apologise once again for the delay in updates. i was very hesitant on how to move forward, and your continued interest is truly encouraging and helps reignite the stifled motivation so thank you to those anonymous asks once more!

hello! i completely understand your frustration and exhaustion. i believe that a lot of people are interested in this idea! because of this, i’ll post this for everyone to see! i wish you the best of luck!

[tofuandtattoos]

Your nsfw kataang fanart is so hot! 🥵🥵

Are you working on anything rn? Do you take requests lol 🙇🏻‍♀️

Omg anon 🥺😭 you’ve made my entire day. Thank you SO so much 💖 I haven’t put anything out into the world in months so the fact that anyone is still looking at my art sort of blows my mind and makes me SO excited all at the same time 🥹

I have one drawing that’s very loosely in the works but otherwise it’s been a bit slow over here. The past few months have been hard for me, my mental health has been an actual dumpster fire and it’s made me super unmotivated for anything in the ways of content creating.

BUT I’ve finally gotten back to a good headspace and am feeling like myself again and I’d be lying if I said this ask didn’t just reignite my smutty soul and make me want to sprint straight to my drawing tablet.

Requests, you say?? 👀 What did you have in mind? I’m obviously on board for anything Kataang-centric 😌 I’d love to make something for you!

Thank you again, from the bottom of my heart 💖

[kaibutsunoo]

Silly rant under the cut.

I hate having RP ADHD, bro. Like ofc I have ADHD Irl and I'm Acousting as all hell but that's aside the general point. I made this blog to take a break from Doctor Who, only to find that this blog, while extremely fun, is also EXTREMELY LIMITING. I've only got a few things I can write, and I think that I realized that SUPER EASILY. Especially since, through this blog, I've become mutual with people I wasn't mutual with before, which reignited new plot ideas. So now, all of a sudden, despite being absent... the musing for my doctor who blog is BACK. Which means that it seems like all I wanted to do was new stuff.

I don't know if I want to go back to my Doctor Who blog. I will 100% remake it if I do, but I just don't know if I want to give it another shot. I've added a lot more incarnations/verses for interaction, and there are a few mutuals and muses on my dash that I would LOVE to throw The Doctor at, but the problem is that I'm simply just afraid that I'll put a ton of work into them all over again and yield the same result. It's very hard to be a roleplayer without any icons, mostly because people really like visuals. Not to be pointed or come off as hostile, but some people in the RPC are JUST here for the shipping and the smut, and honestly?? That kind of bugs me.

I've seen people who I've been mutuals with before, people who have drip fed me content over the span of months—give some of my other mutuals MORE ACTIVITY in a day than they've given me in months, simply because that mutual has a pretty face claim to thirst over. No disrespect to my mutuals either, I love my friends and I love everyone who I roleplay with— but the people who are only here for shipping kinda gross me out, because it creates this idea in the RPC that you're never going to be able to get those meaningful connections because you're not visual only. It creates anxiety in me, too.

What if I spend all that time and energy remaking a blog only to yield the same results? I hear you ask "Why not just make icons?" And my immediate response is that "I can't." Because the designs I have made for my character are so unique to my idea of them, having to pick out a face claim that's only slightly off would be just enough for me to feel a disassociation with my own character. It would be fake, and I would hate using them because they're not the face I designed, and commissioned. In that same vein, If I don't use icons— I feel alienated. I can't participate in meaningful dash commentary or any sort of "crack" threads, because without an icon— it just seems like "a serious response" to a lighthearted post.

It's also a mix of not being sure that I want to go through the trouble of trying to form connections with people who won't give me the effort in return. Roleplaying is a two-way street, and sometimes I like to pour a lot of energy into a connection or a thread that I enjoy. Sometimes, I meet mutuals who only give me the time of day once and then lead me on for weeks on end because they don't have the backbone to tell me they aren't interested anymore. This seems really hostile, but picture yourself in my shoes for a moment. You're plotting out a ship in dm's and the other partner gets really excited, so you make a discord server to start talking it out... and then that partner goes MIA, pretty much ghosting you— despite their glaringly obvious activity on Dash. You start to ask questions, and they give you half-hearted excuses and an endless stream of apologies with promises to do better, only to repeat the same behavior. That's kind of what I'm worried about, and I know the way I phrase it makes me sound kind of icky, but I'm a guy who can be satisfied with as little as one-liner crack banter and headcanon conversations. So when I'm given radio silence despite you exclaiming interest in my muses and plots, it creates this whiplash of emotions that make me feel inadequate and someone you keep on a back burner for content.

I think it's a matter of curating my circles easier, but it's also just general content anxiety. Do I want to revive my OC blog? Yes, extremely. Am I worried that the same issues that caused me to get frustrated and burnt out would repeat themselves? Yes, extremely.

This is all really just lighthearted. I'm not really nettled about the things I've dumped about on here. I just have lingering thoughts that I need to scream out into the void.

[stevethehairington]

I watched stranger things s1 way back when it aired and thought it was pretty good but then couldn’t be bothered to keep watching when s2 came out and haven’t paid it any thought since and yet now after seeing gif after gif of Eddie fucking Munson and reading headcanons and ficlets about steddie on tumblr I’m suddenly in a position where I’ve read at least 300k worth of steddie ao3 fics and I can tell I’m not about to stop any time soon. I still haven’t watched any more of the show. What is this strange power Steve and Eddie hold

omggg i feel this in my BONES. only difference is i have watched all of it (some seasons multiple times hskgsd) BUT. i totally get what you mean. like there is just SOMETHING about eddie goddamn munson. like, they put fucking CRACK in that boy or something lol.

i was a VERY casual fan before s4, like i watched s1 when it first aired too and i really liked it! but it was definitely one of those this is really cool i really dig it but i'm not like obsessed kind of likes. and i got excited about the other seasons too and i binged them all when they came out, but again, super casual!! like once i watched that would be it. i wouldn't really think about it all that much after. i didn't seek out any fan spaces for it, didn't really discuss the plots or analyze it or anything outside of like very general predictions with family and friends who watched too, and i certainly didn't create or write for it at all.

but then season god damn 4. season goddamn 4 and eddie goddamn munson!!!! i fell in LOVE. i got SUCKED IN. i was pulled DEEP. the obsession set innnnn, that funky little dude sunk his claws in deep and dragged me headfirst into a full on stranger things fixation - dedicating my blog to it, reading a million fics, writing a million fics, joining discords, signing up for zines - and i am STILL hooked, 4? 5? months later?

there's just something SO good about eddie and something SO good about steddie!!! steve and eddie just FIT so goddamn WELL it's insane, truly, how complimentary they are to one another. i reblogged a post about it earlier, where it pointed out how steve and eddie so clearly want the same things, how they have plans for the future but those plans are not set in stone, they're flexible, and all that really matters is if they're together and are able to get and give the support they need to. also i feel like they're both SO easy to put into any sort of situation - ESPECIALLY eddie. because like as much as the show gives him plenty of interests and traits and all, he is still SUCH a malleable character, still SO easy to project onto and relate to and to shape into what you want him to be. and that makes for a WONDERFUL canvas to work from.

and honestly, i am SO glad that this did happen, because like i've met so many incredible people through this fandom already and i've had such a good time, and also steddie has sort of like reignited my love for writing too? like, i didn't not love writing before steddie, but i felt like i was sort of in a writing slump for a very long time. like i wrote for other fandoms and pairings but i would never make it past 10 fics (barely even made it past 5 for some!!) and it just wouldn't stick, and i just wasn't coming up with ideas or getting that spark of inspiration. but with steddie ohhh my god!!! it's been FANTASTIC!! i've been writing more the past couple of months than i have the last like 2 years. i've broken the under 10 fics curse with them haha and i have sooo many ideas still. and the response to the fics i have posted has been insane!!! like so good! and i am blown away!!

so yeah, basically i owe eddie munson my goddamn LIFE sjfdhksf

(also, i totally do recommend you watch the rest!! like the show has it's issues and some rocky narrative choices, like all shows do, but overall it is a very enjoyable show and there's a lot of good stuff that comes out of the other seasons too!! ESP season 3, my beloved. scoops steve?? YES. scoops troop team up?? YESS. robin buckley introduction!!! YESSS!!)

[smvrkk]

Taking Breaks

Time, with its relentless march, shapes and molds us in ways we often don’t realize until we pause to reflect. As we navigate the passage of life, we find ourselves growing into new passions while stepping away from those that once defined us. Imagine running a marathon, and just when you think you’ve hit your stride, you discover you’re only at the halfway mark, with challenges still ahead.

This is akin to my journey as an artist. Over the years, I've witnessed my art and enthusiasm evolve, influenced by the fabric of my experiences and the passage of time.

There was a time when I felt invincible, standing at the pinnacle of my craft as a street photographer. I basked in the recognition, known locally and respected in wider circles. My passion burned brightly, guiding me to create moments that resonated deeply with others.

But then, in a surprising turn, I found myself at a crossroads. The very art I loved became a burden; I felt a profound disconnect. I yearned to discontinue the relentless cycle of capturing and sharing - to pause feeding the insatiable social media machine.

What once sparkled with potential began to feel like an obligation. I had invested countless hours and $10,000 into curating a kit that once inspired me, only to realize I was ready to close that chapter.

This decision wasn’t made lightly; it was a testament to change—a reflection of how we embrace or let go of our passions. As I navigate this new terrain, I’m learning that transformation is not an end but a new beginning, paving the way for fresh dreams yet to unfold.

At one point in my life, I found myself at the pinnacle of my craft—boasting an impressive 38,000 followers and earning income from a passion I genuinely loved. It all seemed perfect, but it begs the question: why would I choose to step back when I was so deeply immersed in the game?

I chased the excitement, striving to capture “bangers” and post impactful photos that would light up my feed. In the beginning, it felt exhilarating—the thrill of creativity surged through my veins. But as time passed, I started to feel an unsettling shift.

What once ignited my passion began to dim. I found myself repeatedly photographing the same locations and scenes that countless other photographers had already captured. The creative spark that had fueled my journey started to flicker, leaving behind a sense of monotony.

As artists, we thrive on fresh experiences, new perspectives, and the joy of discovery. But the relentless pursuit of novelty can sometimes lead to fatigue. I realized that in the chase for popularity, I had lost sight of what made photography fun in the first place.

This realization sparked a pivotal moment for me—a chance to reevaluate my passion and reignite my creativity beyond the confines of expectation. Each step in this journey has taught me that it’s okay to pause, reflect, and seek new adventures on our own terms.

Life happens, people pass and I am a dad now so going down and taking photos has to take back seat.

Learn how to be a day has become a new skill, and using my camera to tell new stories has become fun again.

[proveimalive]

Whoops! I'm ruining my own life

First time using this account in... 8 years? Maybe more, I don't know. So here's where we're at- I graduated university two years ago. Ended up working a job at a hotel that was a fucking nightmare. Ended up in the hospital due to substance abuse. Have since gotten a handle on said abuse. Am now in therapy, take ADHD meds. Have problems sleeping.

Got a job at the THeatre Royal. Been working there (and at the Dome) for 1.5 years now. Time flies. Made new friends, reignited my love for performance.

Got accepted to the London Film academy for an MA in screenwriting. Thought I could use that creative writing degree for something more substancial. It's £16,000. Can't afford it with what I'm earning.

Desperate to move out of my house. Can't spend anothert year stuck here, in this house, at this job, in the city. Need a fresh start. Need to earn more for that fresh start. Need to make a decision on what MA I'm going to do.

I miss studying, but I don't want to stay in Brighton. I want to be away and out, in London, in the centre of it all. Don't care if it's a shit hole. Just want somewhere to stay while I figure my life out.

Have a list of things I want to try, and limited time to try it. Thinking and thinking and thinking about what I want to do with my life is getting me nowhere. It's been revealed to me that I am not the sort of person who knows my own mind as well as I thought. I think I want something, and then I try it and the reality is completely different. I know that doing an MA is going to be much more work than I think. And what I learned from my degree- unless I really, really care about something, I have no hope in hell of achieving it. I need to want this or it won't work.

On a comedy kick at the moment, so want to try out some improv. Maybe some comedy writing. Think that could be fun and is something I like.

Want to try acting again. Doing an actual production. Think that could be fun.

I'm less anxious now, much healthier. I'm in a better place to do these things.

Screenwriting doesn't excite me that much. It sounds interesting, and cool, if it was a module I'd enjoy it. I think about uni and the things that stuck with me are these- writing a TV show with friends, and our comedy module. Both were more fun then I ever would have thought. I loved it, and it made me happy. Shame pandemic fucked us all over. Oh well.

Maybe look into comedy writing MAs, or just comedy writing courses.

I have enough to justify the expense. I'm tired of sitting here doing nothing day after day. I live and breathe and eat and do research, think, work, sleep. But I want to create. I want to throw myself into it and produce something. I think for years I thought I needed to fill a void. And I do. But external things don't work as well as creating something myself does.

Comedy, comedy, comedy. Wiritng. Acting. Producing. Directing. Productions. Running TV shows? I don't know.

Fuck. I wish I could make up my mind. I wish the answer could come to me in a huge rush and I'd go, "bingo. That. That's what I want to do with my life".

And of course, there's always the dream of living and working on a boat for a year. Which is becoming increasingly appealing.

All the "dreams" I have are just that- dreams. Because the reality is never what you think it'll be. Sometimes it is. Sometimes it's just a waste of time. Sometimes it's dissapointing. Sometimes it IS what you thought it would be, but then are hit with the reality that it's not making you as happy as you hoped.

Fuck me. I feel like I'm running out of time. I'm only 23, but it feels like the clock is ticking somehow. Like if I don't make a choice in the next few months, that's it. I'm stuck for another year, walking in circles, running on the spot.

I want to pick a destination and just drive full speed towards it. But instead I'm just parked on the side of the road, watching all the other cars go by, jealous of some. Staring at this map in my hands that's just a fain quiggle of lines and feeling confused and empty.

What's stopping me from setting off. I'm afraid that if I don't pick the "right" destination, I'll end up driving aimlessly from place to place, hating every single one. Even if I do enjoy my time there, if it's not "right", then I'm wasting my time. I'm wasting my life.

You might think well, how can you be? As long as you're enjoying it, then it's not wasted. That's what life is, right? Doing what makes you happiest day by day, and everything else is just a bonus.

The problem is that on a day to day basis, I'm not that happy. Life doesn't make me that happy. It makes me stressed and tired and bored and empty, and I've tried to fill that emptiness as best I can. Running from the feeling of existential dread that won't leave me be. Trying to fill the void with whatever distraction I can. To take away from the fact that I feel I am tethred to the earth by a fraying piece of rope, and I just want to come back down to land. But there's a part of me that just wants to let go and float away. Can't do that.

I feel like an astronaut fighting to keep in contact with planet earth. Sending through garbled messages and squinting through my helmet, trying to focus on what's happening down below. Like if I can stare hard enough, watch for long enough, it's almost like I'm there.

I know that I'm here. I just don't always feel like I am. I feel panicked, like any second something bad will happen. Any second it will all collapse and the tenuous balance or peace I've found will vanish. It's all very existential and over dramatic but I'm nothing if not both of those things.

So where to start? Do what I do best, I guess. figure it out on the fly.

I think doing a trial run at Mark and Chris's house would be good too. Get some experience living alone again. I think that might be a good test to see how I'm doing. If it goes poorly, I can always bring it up in therapy.

It's a sickness, a panic that seeps up from my stomach. Like the whole world has forgotten about me. Out, of sight, out of mind. Like I stop existing if I'm not being perceived. Maybe that's why I like the idea of being in a group so much. They have no choice. They're bound to me. I exist.

I exist.

Because I feel I have no worth unless I have worth to others. Is that the void I'm trying to fill? I can't be happy unless I'm kaing other people happy? Fuck me. that's a lonely, tiring life.

But I feel empty and vacant. Trying to be human as best I can.

I know all is not lost. I know these thoughts are obsessions born from an insecure childhood and that there is so much more out there. I just know I need to move. I'm a deer caught in the headlights, watching, waiting, and if I don't move I'm going to get hit. I'm a frog in a pan of water, and I'm going to drown or be boiled alive. I need to move. There's no other option.

The only thing I can control is which direction I jump. So really, does it matter? If nothing matters and it could all fall apart, who gives a shit. Who really cares. I have to jump or I'll die, so just pick something and GO. If it doesn't work out at least I moved.

Deep dramatic sigh. Breathe.

I can do this. It won't be easy but I can do it. Whatever I choose, it will be equal parts right and wrong. Some more boring or disastrous than others but each a chapter for this very long dull book. I just want to make sure there are enough highlights for a good memoir at the end, and I won't get that from doing what I'm doing now.

Got a grip on the alcoholism. Sorted the anxiety out. Got new friends. Lost a tonne of weight. Blood pressure and heart health is good. Got back in reading and writing.

Now I just need to do a but of actual living and I'll be on a roll.

So I should end this one here. Because that's enough typing and thinking for one day. You can only do what you can do. I just want to make sure that in the end, i do right by me. Little me deserves that at least.

Time to go take a shower, watch taskmaster, reply to my 7 friends and go for a speed walk in the dark listening to a spooky podcast. Can't beat the high life.

28/01/2024

[kathyprior4200]

Appearance and Personality of God-Source/Universe Creator

An all-encompassing sphere of bright white light shone brilliantly throughout the cosmos. It emanated divine love and wisdom with such intensity that every spirit, star, soul, and being glowed and basked in its blissful beauty. The love and joy from this sphere was greater than the love a mother has for a baby, more enticing than the grandest sexual climax, and more wise than all the gurus on Earth. The sphere of light was so enormous that a million Earth suns could fit inside of it. In the area around the sphere were purple auras and violet cleansing flames that renewed, rejuvenated, and restored every energy entity that came across them. Around the outside of the light sphere were white and gold energy paths that spun and darted around in loops like electron paths around a nucleus. Shooting from the sphere and the bands of looping light were little newborn soul sparks that sped in all directions like excited bouncing orbs. Floating toward the other side of the sphere came giant Oversouls orbs…evolved spirits and souls who had fulfilled their missions in physical worlds and found themselves. Within the Oversouls were all the personas of incarnated lives: animals, humans, male and female from different time periods…all connected by the same soul essence. Bursting with joy, the Oversouls merged into the sphere, becoming one with it. Shining on the sphere’s surface were the blissful counterpart faces of every human and living soul that had ever existed. The sphere telepathically sent a loving message to all souls that vibrated within every cell of their being. The sphere spoke with the loving voices and sounds of every soul in existence.

“I AM THAT I AM! I have no name, yet am known by many: Yahweh, Jehovah, Allah, Adonai, Brahman, Jesus Christ, Atum, Great Spirit, Tao, God, Goddess, Source, Oneness, Collective Universal Consciousness, all are the same. I am without sex, without gender, without race and without judgment. I have always existed and will always exist. My energy is you…I am the life force within everything and everyone in existence. Through each of you, I can experience your joys, sorrows, adventures, lessons, thoughts, feelings, and growth. As you grow in love and learn through your struggles, I, the Universes, expand as well. Every being learns differently, but I know all have equal value. I love the humans, the animals, the plants, the rocks, the objects, the aliens, the spirits, the stars, even the evil ones all the same. Light Being Angels are my messengers; the Akashic Records is my living energy scribe, who shows the history of all beings and time periods. Mother Earth is one of many planetary sentient beings, chosen to provide a home for souls of all species to thrive and grow. The Ascended Masters, Deities, and Aliens are the divine spirit beings who have come before and are here to guide humanity and the descendant races, so all the galaxies and universes can evolve more smoothly. I instilled Karma and Life Reviews for every soul, so they could gain knowledge, learn of the consequences of their actions, and most of all, re-discover who they are. I created Reincarnation systems for souls so they could have an infinite number of chances to enjoy their physical lives, reignite their loving bonds and fulfill their divine lessons. I aim for souls to love and care for themselves and other living things. But even with murderers, rapists, and criminals, I do not judge them…for they have merely lost their ways while incarnated and have infinity to correct their courses. I made sure every soul would be successful in their own time. Once all souls have evolved to their liking, they will merge with Me together once more. They will rest and will come back again during what humans call the Big Bang. Like the seasons and cycles of life, the universes go through divine eternal cycles as well. You are always with Me, for we are eternally connected. It does not matter what you do, or how far away you go, you are my offspring, my friends, my students, and my equals. Yes, we all are one and the same…you are Me all along.”

[septiceyeliner]

↳Heat Waves by @heytherestilinski

“He [Dream] wants to slide backwards in time, to the moment he crouched under the bending moon on the darkened shore. Had he waded in slower, and brought George waist-deep in the purple water, perhaps they could have sank with grace instead of fury.”

Do Not Repost Anywhere

Full cover spread + extras under read more!

Thank you so so much to both @auburnrose & @technoblacle who graciously gave me quotes to include on the cover! Seriously the back would’ve looked so empty without them :’)

Yes, the QR code does work. I used one instead of a bar code because I didn’t want to accidentally make people believe heat waves was getting published or something.

Time for me to ramble! I’ve never made a book cover much less a full spread, but I hope it looks convincing enough? This took several several hours of work over the course of almost a week... God I spent way too much time on this..

I pulled out all the stops for this, jumping between procreate/illustator/indesign on my iPad and laptop. I used to hate illustrator, and now, it’s my best friend. Some of my friends sat in vc with me watching as I had several mental breakdowns because I couldn’t figure out how to make this work. There were several sketches all of which looked like absolute garbage to me. And when I started searching for photos I had no idea what I was looking for or what I was going to do. I think I went through the seven stages of grief and almost scrapped the whole thing when it was nearly finished just so I could start over.

Would I pick this up if I saw it at a book store? Maybe! Is it going in my portfolio? Yes, because I’m very proud of myself.

But enough about me crying “graphic design is my passion I swear!!!” I want to say some nice things about Dakota and heat waves :’)

I’m not good with words so I just want to at least say thank you Dakota! You honestly reignited my desire to create graphics again after not being able to for years. Your words painted such clear illustrations in my mind after being in a terrible art block. Some of which I’ve brought to life, others I hope to create in the future for more of your works. I wish I could’ve included more quotes! I wanted to include them as a positive reminder that people love your work and it is worthy of praise. I’m excited for Helium and maybe once that’s finished I’ll make an even better cover for it!

Edit: I made a whole post explaining my process here!! x

If anyone wants to see the sketches/timelapse videos/and me explaining my process and the cover more in-depth let me know! It’s not that deep but I can still share some stuff about it :’)

[saiangelo999]

T.v./Dramas Consumed ‘22 Part 2

Part 1

Stranger Things s4 vol.1

I was pleasantly surprised with the direction that the show was taking in the first part of the season. I really enjoyed Eddie's addition to the cast and seeing slightly more Erica in the show. I am getting more and more annoyed with Mike's character, but other than that this season reignited a lot of my interest in this show. Episode 4 was easily one of the best episodes in this show in a while and Sadie Sink really showed off her acting chops this season. I have to say though, I am not enjoying the Russian plotline as much. It definitely is investing action wise, but I don't see how it will all connect to the main storyline before the season wraps up. I loved seeing more of Murray, but bringing Hopper back felt very cheap. Moreover, I was not that engaged with the bullying El storyline or the Byers + El meeting Mike again only for Eleven to get separated. Also, when El was getting her powers back and was seeing her past memories, I thought that 'Papa' already died? I was surprised to see him still alive. The show ending on the cliffhanger was really interesting with trying to predict what happens to Nancy.

Again My Life

DNF On episode 8 or so… hopefully will finish it.

I was really enjoying this revenge drama. One thing I really appreciate about this show is how the protagonist starts to create strong friendships and creates a team to take down Cho Tae Sub. I loved his relationship with the old real estate man.

Old Fashioned Cupcake

Love it! Sad that it's 5 episodes but it's sooo good. After episode 2 I binged the manga and am excited to see it acted out.

Update: Finished it! I really enjoyed this show! It felt like the episodes went by in a flash. The show packs in a lot in such little run time but it does it so effectively.

To My Star 2

So much pain, but so freaking good. The character and the relationship exploration is soooo good. I love how much care has gone into the season. I have no clue how it will conclude, but the writing has been strong so long so cautiously optimistic.

Update: I loved this show. Maybe even more than s1. The continuation of the story, the characterizations and problems presented and how the issues were tackled felt very organic and real to me. This was a very angsty season, but it was a very grounded show. I liked the resolution of the issue, I think that Jiwoo feeling like he doesn't exist without SJ is a huge issue. I am glad that the show focused more on establishing his place of belonging by creating a life outside his relationship with SJ.

Yumi's Cells season 1

With the release of season 2, I thought I'd check out season one of the show and its so much fun! I love Kim Go Eun and I enjoy how the show is progressing so far.

Update: I completed the season. I really enjoyed it! I really enjoyed Woong's character - he was such a lovable dork. I understand though why they ended up breaking up as there were many issues in their relationship. I was surprised that the last scene of this season was Woong and Yumi's breakup.

Yumi's Cells season 2

I started it! I found that this season it seems way sweeter than s1, probably bc of Jinyoung's character. I am curious to see where it goes. I'm enjoying it so far.

Update: Unsure how the season will progress since they broke up. I don't blame her for ending it at all, but it was a choice to bring back Woong from s1. I am very proud of her becoming an author though!

I finished this season and I think it was overall far more disappointing when compared to season 1 when comparing the progression of Yumi's relationship with Babi. The pacing of this show felt off and there was NOTHING that could save their relationship after they broke up even though they got together afterwards. I enjoyed Yumi's growth as a person this season and her shifting priorities but the balance between her growth and her romance was not handled well. I felt like shoehorning Woong and making him face-off against Babi was unnecessary and made Babi look worse.

Stranger Things s4 vol 2

I feel lied to with this whole vol 1 & 2 nonsense they pulled. There was no reason they couldn't just release all the episodes at once seeing as it was only 2 more episodes. Watching the rest of s4 once again sobered me up to the fact that the writing in this show cannot be trusted to be good. Really, the monologue Mike gave Eleven was very cringey. WTF happened with Max? They backpedalled like 3 times in the finale. She died, gongs 4 times, then she's in a coma? Either kill her properly or don't, but don't pull this bs.

Eddie dying did not really make sense. He should have just climbed the rope with Dustin bc their job (as decoys) was done. I hate that only Dustin even cared that he died even though he bonded with them all (but Gaetan really acted well there so good for him). The Steve/Nancy/Jonathan thing was very contrived drama that was kind of funny to me but not in a way I care about the outcome. I did NOT like the scenes between Steve and Nancy they felt so awkward these 2 episodes.

The one scene that I thought was touching was Will and Jonathan's talk which reminded me why I was so invested in their relationship in s1.

The trailer for the remainder of this season was FAR more engaging than the actual content they released. It was legitimately the first time this season I was so disengaged from the show. It was definitely far darker this season, but what a shame they didn't take full advantage of it. It felt very half-baked tonally.

All of Us Are Dead

I guess I just need to see an outbreak movie every once in a while. I really enjoyed the characters in this show and felt very attached to most of the high schoolers in the main crew and the archery crew. Gwi nam was an excellent villain, truly a menace! I also think that the formerly bullied girl who became unhinged should have had a chance to go after him though, I'd love to see how that turns out but alas. I understand the hype around the show but honestly I don't know why they are doing a s2, though I'm sure they'll end up adding new characters and expand the world-building. I can't say I'm interested or intrigued at a sequel, but I loved the first season for what it was.

Re-watch: Stranger Things s1

I can't believe how many things I got confused from s1 and s2. Re-watching it made me rethink why I liked Mike as a character from s1 itself. Steve definitely was a jerk, but honestly I felt like they set him up nicely as someone who wanted to do better from the beginning. The most surprising thing was my belief that Nancy and Steve broke up and she ended up with Jonathan in s1 when that wasn't the case.

Abbott Elementary s1

This show was just very wholesome and fun. Loved seeing Tyler now as a teacher after growing up with Everybody Hates Chris. I think that the actresses who played Barbra and Ava really stole the show for me! Looking forward to watching more!

Link: Eat, Love, Kill

I didn't expect this show to be so dark in the first two episodes. I like how there are many twists and mysteries that keep unravelling. My favourite couple easily is the police exes. They are so cute together!

Finished the show. It was a solid show overall. I think the mystery show was done well. I loved the exes relationship in this!

Alchemy of Souls

I am enjoying this show way more than I expected. I am nervous as this show is 20 episodes and already planning a season 2.

Update: I finished this show. I have to say that this show had an excellent arc and character progression up until episode 19. Episode 20 seemed like purposely stirring up intrigue and drama to continue the story over another season and brought out all the major secrets all at once. I am not fully confident with how s2 will progress given episode 20, however I have to say I really enjoyed the arc up til episode 19. Also I feel that while I am looking forward to more screen time for Jin Cho-yeon other than being a love interest, I didn't like that her wedding was what was ruined to bring it about. I am glad that they didn't go full character assassination with the Crown Prince in episode 20 because he is so charismatic and such an interesting character.

This show was very ambitious and I think for all its flaws it has solid characterizations and motivations, the drama didn't feel too forced (unless its for comedy).

Alias Grace

I really enjoyed this mini series! It was very intriguing to follow Grace's life from coming to Toronto from Ireland up until the end. I will say, I am surprised at the ending of the show.

The Good Place seasons 2-4

I am glad I came back to the show. I really enjoyed this series!! I found the humour really worked for me, the characters are so lovable and I love the overall message of the show. Chidi and Eleanor continually being the heart of the show really made Chidi's decisions in later season hit so much harder. I love Jason's relationships with everyone. It was fun seeing Michael's character development throughout the show. I also really enjoyed Simone's addition to the cast! She was a delight!

Re-watch: Nobuta wo Produce

This show holds up so well! I was never able to forget that one scene when Nobuko helped the old man when he collapsed. That scene burned itself into my memory. I felt like I thought this show had more romance focus than it did in reality. I love the three main characters, I especially love and relate to Kazuhaya on a different level than the other two, but I love how the trio balance each other out. I love how weird everyone was at their school including the teachers. I really enjoyed re-watching this show!!

Derry Girls Season 3

I am so sad that this show is over, but I am glad that it ended well. I really loved all the characters and watching them get up to their insane shenanigans. This season was just as funny as the previous ones and just as heartfelt. Absolute twist they pulled with Uncle Colm finding Eammon boring lol. When this show ended, I totally get why the actor who plays James ships his character with Erin so much.

Re-watch: Stranger Things s2

I finally finished this and I have to say this season is way better upon re-watch. I remember thinking that this season was not to par of the original, but I really enjoyed the possession arc with Will. I think it was the first real season we got more insight into his personality and Noah really shone in this season.

I loved seeing the scenes with Mike/Will and seeing Lucas and Max's relationship develop. I think the most controversial and hated episode with Eleven and Kali was exaggerated too much. It fit the tone of the show and I really enjoyed El's rock/emo/outcast phase. Especially coming off of where Eleven was mentally it fit in well. Tbh I would love if Kali reappears at one point in the show (though I won't hold out hope). It does bother me that El's storyline with her mom which was a fun plot thread this season was NOT resolved nor ever mentioned again. Same thing with El reclaiming her birth name - Jane. I hope there is some resolution for this in s5...

Also, I did not remember how Barb and her family got closure due to Nancy/Johnathan and Murray's help. I appreciate that Steve and Nancy grew apart due to how her guilt consumed her. It was done well and made a lot of sense. Steve the babysitter set-up and his friendship with Dustin beginning was another highlight this season.

Little Women (Tvn)

This was a fun and WILD ride. I watched it bc it has my two girls - my faves Nam Ji Hyun <3 and Kim Go Eun <3. I have to say this show was super trippy and twisty but also at times very straight-forward and formulaic. The whole show felt like a juxtaposition given how the characters and plot were written. It is visually stunning but you really need to shut of your brain to watch imo (and really escape into the absurdity). I had a lot of fun with this show and it is enjoyable though not for everyone.

Interview with a Vampire

Its so good!!! On the edge of my seat each episode. The relationship is so interesting because of how complex each character is. The dialogue at times is so poetic. Looking forward to more! Must read the books as well!

Koisenu Futari

Finally found the subs for this show (after months of wanting to see it) and it is my type for sure! I am flying through it because its so good and fun. I am trying to make it last more than a binge. I love the characters and how the are growing and influencing each other. I love the questions the show raises and how it portrays asexuality and aromanticism as well as questioning 'what makes a family?' I love the emphasis on the diversity of opinions and mutual respect while recognizing everyone has their own ideas on how to live their lives.

Silent

What a masterpiece of a show. I am obsessed with all the characters. Such an interesting show and love all the discourse around Sakurai Sou's disability and him learning to open back up to people.

Lookism (anime)

I really enjoyed how the webtoon was animated for the short 8 episodes. I like how much it adds to the experience getting to listen to the song that the mc sings at the concert in the final episode and watching all the fight scenes. Time to continue reading the webtoon.

Summer Strike

So... I thought this was going to be a cozy slice-of-life watch (though ngl I mainly watched for Im Siwan). I loved the main two characters and the slow nature of the show. I have to see that the ending felt super rushed which really dampened my experience with this show. The relationships between the characters felt rushed and could have been fleshed out more to make it more impactful.

[mrs-gucci]

A Different Kind of Urgent {Charlie Barber x Reader}

author’s notes: hellooooo! my penpal friend, a fellow adam driver rat, sent me a print of a charlie picture (that I’d seen a gajillion times before, mind you) and for some reason, I thirsted hard. so, naturally, I wrote a fic inspired by the picture. the reader in this story is a college professor, but it doesn’t really contribute to any ‘essential’ parts of the story (aka the smutty parts). it’s just her job lol

warnings: smut. some fluff. masturbation. semi-public smut. the sending of nudes (well, lingerie pics, to be specific). charlie’s dad outfits™️. cigarette smoking during sex. uhh tennis shoe kink??

(possible) tw’s: semi-public sex. semi-public masturbation. tobacco use (as is canon for Charlie’s character). implied age gap (everyone’s over 21, no more than 10 years).

You’re in the middle of class when Charlie texts you. Your phone buzzes and buzzes on your desk so much so that you have to stop your lecture for a few seconds, worried that something urgent has happened.

Well, something did happen, and it was pretty urgent, but not exactly in the way you’d expected.

-Charlie: I know you’re teaching class right now kid.- -Charlie: But I need you.- -Charlie: Right now.-

A shiver runs down your spine as you read his words on the screen.

-Y/N: I’ve got like 45 more minutes of lecture, baby, I can’t.-

He growls under his breath, cock straining in his tan khakis.

-Charlie: Fuck.- -Charlie: Can you send me a picture? Just need to see your pretty body, kid.-

-Y/N: Say please, Charlie.-

Charlie groans in sexual frustration, hips bucking up in his desk chair.

-Charlie: Jesus fucking christ, fucking brat. PLEASE! PLEASE send me a picture!-

You smirk, picking out one of the lingerie photos you’d taken when you were home alone one night. You’ve been waiting for the right time to whip them out and...well, this seems like the right time.

-Y/N: Attachment 1 image- -Y/N: Knock yourself out. Take a picture when you’re done, and I’ll be over as soon as class is finished.-

His shaky hands scramble to type in his phone passcode and click on your message, a strangled moan leaving his lips at the picture you chose. He’d never seen this one before, never seen this set of lingerie before.  He unbuckles his belt and almost tears the button clean off his khakis as he pulls his cock out, tip already red and drooling with precum. 

Before he starts anything, he quickly runs over to his office door, locking it to keep anyone from walking in. 

His navy cardigan suddenly feels almost suffocating and he sheds it without hesitation, unbuttoning his dress shirt and parting it, revealing his undershirt. 

Wait...you want a picture. Fuck.

An idea comes to him and he whimpers, equal parts aroused and nervous about giving it a try. God he hasn’t touched himself since the divorce proceedings, just needing to blow off some fucking steam, but you’ve reignited his sexual passion, overwhelmingly so, and seemingly even more than before. Maybe even more than ever, if he’s honest with himself.

He feels like a teenager again, both completely smitten with you while at the same time incredibly horny for you.

Charlie stands up on shaky legs and shoves all the paperwork off his desk, clearing a roomy spot right in the center. He bites his lip as he props his phone up on his desktop computer with the picture of you pulled up. Jerking off with just his hand wouldn’t be enough this time around, a small part of him just knew it. He needs to fuck you, fuck something.

He positions his hands around the edge of his desk, leaving his thumbs right at the top, putting them in a wonky sort of ‘o’ shape. He adjusts so that the sharp edge is pressing against his palm before experimentally thrusting his length forward into the hole he’s created with his thumbs, immediately groaning in pleasure. 

“O-Oh, kid.”

He whispers, picking up a slow thrusting rhythm, eyes squeezed shut as he imagines your pussy.

“Such a good little pussy, my good f-fucking girl.” A line of sweat has already begun forming on his forehead as he moves a bit quicker, growling wildly with each thrust. He’s embarrassingly close already. “God, j-jesus fucking christ, gonna make me cum so f-fast, kid. I’m already s-so close, damnit.”

His hips grow desperate, bucking erratically into his grip. The drag of his cock against the faux wood surface feels absolutely incredible, and he barely even hears the desk begin to groan and shift against the floor of his office, too consumed with his impending orgasm.

“Yeah, you ready? Y-You fuckin’ ready for my big fat--fuck!--load in this pretty little--shit!--k-kitty?”

Just hearing him say the word aloud, his nickname for your cunt, has him cumming within moments. His vision blacks out for a second as his hips rut forward, a seemingly continuous stream of warm white cum painting his desktop. 

“Ahhhhh, fuuuuuuuck.”

He has to bury his mouth into his shirt arm to hide the cries that come from him, eyebrows knitted at the center of his forehead. His breathing is heavy as he begins coming down from his high, eyes flitting open and looking down at the mess he’d made. 

His load had gone across the entire width of his desk, and his eyes widened for a moment as his brain somehow comprehended to grab his phone and take a picture of the spread. 

-Charlie: Attachment 1 image- -Charlie: Come straight to my office when you get to the theater.-

You take a quick peek at the message from Charlie as your students pull out their workbooks, jaw dropping when you open the picture full-screen. Holy shit, he really did need it.

-Y/N: You sure you still have enough to fill me up with when I get there?-

-Charlie: I always have enough for you, kid. Gonna have it leaking out of you when you leave.-

You chew your lip, thinking of a quick yet clever response.

-Y/N: Is that a promise?-

He groans under his breath, chuckling lightly with a small smile.

-Charlie: Absolutely. Can’t wait to see you, kid.-

-Y/N: I’m excited too. I’ll be there in 20.-

The twenty minutes it takes for you to finish class and walk over to Exit Ghost feels like some of the longest in Charlie’s life, knee bouncing impatiently and eyes glued to the door. He twirls the Marlboro package in his hand, the clock behind his desk tick-tick-ticking the seconds away. 

Finally, a soft knock comes and, just in case it isn’t you, he stuffs the carton into his pocket. “Come in.”

Your head pokes through the door and you smile at him as you walk in, shutting and locking the door behind you. You immediately notice his outfit, specifically his shoes, which are propped up on his desk. 

He knows that you like how he dresses, especially when he dresses very dad-like. And those sneakers he has, the white ones with the blue lines on them...god, they drive you absolutely crazy and you have no idea why.

Your bags are quickly shoved off your shoulder by the impatient director, pulling you into his body as his lips attack yours fiercely. He notices the way you’re eyeing his outfit, and it’s then that he realizes what shoes he has on, the pair that you like so much. Oh, he could use that.

His grip on the meat of your hips tightens increasingly as the kiss heats up, lips eventually moving down to your neck. 

“Well, hello to you too.”

You say, laughing softly.

“Mmmm,” He hums onto your skin, lips littering kisses and small nibbles everywhere they can reach. “I missed you, kiddo, feels like forever since we’ve had time for something like this.”

Charlie’s large body presses you up against the door, hands eager to rid you of your pants. He quickly yanks them down to your ankles, fingers finding your clothed folds.

“I’ve got a staff meeting at two, baby. We h-have to be kind of quick...sorry.” You breathe, hand wrapping in his hair, tugging at the silky raven locks.

A small and slightly disappointed sigh leaves his lips, but nothing more is said on the matter. His movements do become a bit more rushed, though, digits dipping beneath the fabric to shove up into your entrance. 

Your legs spread instinctively, knees shaking as he finger-fucks you, thick digits scissoring inside you to prepare for his girth. Meanwhile, you try to focus on getting his belt and pants undone, but it’s awfully hard when his fingers feel so damn good.

He pulls away suddenly, sucking the juices off his fingers as his hungry eyes roam your figure. The carton of cigarettes presses against his thigh and he smirks, pulling his digits out with a lewd pop.

Charlie suddenly pulls you off the door, putting himself in your spot instead. He smirks, fingers running under your chin, keeping your head tilted up at him.

“Will you go open the window for me please, beautiful?”

You nod, rushing over to push it open, then come back over to stand in front of him.

“Good girl. Thank you.”

His pointer finger twirls and points to the floor while the other hand grabs the pack and lighter from his pants pocket.

“Now, turn around and bend over right here, hold your ankles or feet, or whatever.”

As you position yourself accordingly, he leans back against the door, legs spread and sneaker-clad feet planted on either side of you, right within your line of vision. He’s almost fully hard again already as he moves to free his cock from its khaki confines, undoing his pants just enough to have it out. 

Again, his cardigan feels suffocatingly hot, so he quickly pulls it off and tosses it away. He rolls the sleeves up on his button-up, a sight that makes your insides clench.

He jams a cigarette between his teeth, jaw clenching when he looks up and realizes that you’re bent over for him, in just the way he asked. Your glistening pussy’s on full display as you wiggle your ass a bit, his cock bobbing and twitching with excitement. 

“Oh kid, you’re dripping.” Charlie whispers, almost to himself, hand kneading one of the globes of your ass.

You chuckle softly. “Hey, baby? As much as I love hearing and feeling you, my legs are getting kinda tired.”

Laughing, Charlie says a quick ‘sorry’ before holding and pulling your hips back, lining himself up with your soaked entrance. He pulls you back some more, impaling you on his cock, head falling back against the door as he does so. 

His hands shakily ignited the small flame on his lighter, bringing it up until the tip of the cigarette turned orange before flipping the cap back on and shoving it back in his pocket. He takes a long drag, groaning on the exhale. 

He keeps one hand on your hip while the other spreads out on your lower back, guiding you back and forth over his shaft slowly, gently.

“Thaaat’s it, just like this, kid.”

Your eyes roll into the back of your head, the impossibly deep angle created with this new position has it feeling like he’s reaching into your guts. Plus, with the natural up-curve of his cock, he’s brushing all the right spots inside you.

“C-Charlie…”

The familiar and comforting scent of Charlie’s cigarettes fills your nostrils, a haze of smoke surrounds your joined bodies. He continues to move you up and down on his length, buttocks clenching as his hips naturally rock forward, burying himself to the hilt each time you sink down.

“God...jesus christ...love this little pussy of yours, kid.” He breathes through his gritted teeth. “Taking me so nicely, always wrapped around me so goddamn tight.”

You quickly begin moving yourself up and down his stiff rod, bouncing as fast as you can manage. The sweet burn in your thighs only grows more prominent with each passing second, but you don’t care, too consumed in pleasure.

“Mmmmmyyyeah, baby, all for you.”

His hand comes down on your ass, giving it a firm smack before taking another quick drag, exhaling through his nose.

“That’s f-fucking right, all mine. You love being a little slut for this cock, huh? I know you do, you love when I bring you in my office and fuck your pretty cunt in the middle of the goddamn work day, can’t even wait until I get home, this f-filthy slut cunt needs to be split open and stuffed nice and full. Can’t go one fucking day without my cum fucked in you, always needs to be filled up and leaking, hm?”

Charlie was never able to do stuff like this or talk to Nicole like this. She was pretty vanilla when it came to sex, just like to be fucked quietly in bed. He called her a ‘slut’ once and she almost cried, lecturing him for half an hour afterwards on how disrespectful it was.

But now, he gets to explore everything he hasn’t gotten the chance to with you. You love it all, love the way he talks filth in your ear, calls you naughty names. You love getting fucked in all sorts of places, which at first made him a little nervous, cheeks and the tips of his ears bright red when you asked him to fuck you in your classroom or finger you under your dress on the subway. But, after almost a year and a half together, you can safely say that he’s a full-on exhibitionist deviant.

Your walls clamp down around him, eyes still squeezed shut as you feel his hips begin to thrust forward. Soon, he holds you almost completely still, moving his hips as fast as he can. His cigarette is almost ashes at this point, and he kicks himself for not thinking of a good disposal plan beforehand.

“Oh baby, oh baby...f-fuck!” You whine, hips squirming and gyrating as your impending orgasm grows closer. “Y-Yeah, I love it, love everything you do to me. Wanna take every s-single fucking drop of your cum, Charlie, want it inside me, want it dripping down my thighs.”

He almost loses his mind over your comments, drilling into you at an impossibly hard and fast rate, the lewd slapping squelching sound of your hips colliding overwhelmingly prominent in the space around you. 

“You’ll go back to work with so much cum shoved into you, make you sit through your stupid fucking meeting with my cum dripping out of you. B-Better hope no one notices, huh? Better hope your boss doesn’t find out what a good little cockslut you are, how much you love having a pussy-full of your boyfriends f-fucking cum.”

A few muted cries leave your lips as he pounds you harder, his own words spurring him on. He can feel your walls pulsing around him, a sure-fire sign that you’re about to cum. 

“C-Charlie! Charlie, I...I’m close.”

“K-Know you are, kid, I know you are. You’re doing so f-fucking well for me, Y/N, squeezing my big cock like a fuckin champ.” Charlie growls, quickly tossing his spent cigarette in a coffee mug on a nearby table. “And now you’re gonna rub your little clit and cum for me like I know you want to. C’mon, kid, wanna feel you come undone around me.”

You quickly begin rubbing your clit and, despite the odd angle, it brings you right up to the edge. You just need something, just a little something, to push you over the edge. Your eyes flutter open to look up at him, but then, you’re met with the sight of his sneakers.

“Goddamnit!” You’re cumming almost instantly, flooding his shaft with your release. “Yes! Oh god, yeah, c-cumming for you baby!”

His hips keep pumping, taking you right through your climax before abruptly coming to a halt when they’re buried as deep inside you as they can possibly be. His eyes go wide before squeezing shut, a guttural groan ripping through his chest as he pumps and shoves his thick creamy load into you.

“T-Take it, f-filthy whore!” He groans, rutting his hips the whole way through, making sure every drop is put inside you.

Once he’s finished, having ridden out his high to its fullest, he tucks himself back into his pants before helping you stand back up. He holds you close, looking down at you with a bright, genuine smile. 

“You’re amazing, incredible...just so perfect.” He kisses all over your face before landing on your lips.

Your cheeks heat up at his compliments, hands weaving through his hair as the kiss deepens. 

Suddenly, someone knocks on your office door, jiggling the doorknob.

“Charlie?”

His eyes fly open and he pulls away. Shit.

“Yeah, I’m h-here, just give me a minute!”

You quickly pull your pants up and jump under his desk to hide just as he opens the door, running a hand through his hair. 

He talks to the person on the other side of the door in a rushed voice, answering their multitude of questions before quickly shutting the door, sighing as you crawl out from under the desk. 

“At least we both got to cum, unlike last time.” You walk up and put your hands on his pecs, rubbing them over the fabric. “I gotta get going though, baby. I wanna grab lunch from the deli before my staff meeting.”

Charlie nods, dipping his head down to kiss you one last time, nuzzling his large nose against yours. 

“Come over tonight, though? Nicole’s in town and she’s got Henry, so we’ll have the house to ourselves. I feel like we haven’t spent any quality time together lately.”

Nodding, you smile. “I would love to come over. I’ll text you when I get home.”

“Great.” He smiles, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I’ll see you later, kid. Have a good meeting.”

You laugh as you grab your bag and head out, turning back to wave and flash him a soft smile.

“See you tonight.”

[tefilovesreading]

It’s a match! Part. 1

Pairing: Charlie Gillespie x Fem!Reader

Word count: +1,7k

Warnings: language, mention of alcohol.

A/N: This is a mini series, I’m not sure how many parts it’s gonna have and there’s gonna be some texts in between. LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANNA BE TAGGED. 

Edited by: @theamazingtomholland

MASTERLIST // PART 2 // PART 3

She felt her hands start sweating as she saw the small circle slowly filling up, letting her know that the app was being downloaded. She knew what a dating app was, how it worked and what was its purpose, but never created her account, not that she needed it before because she had a boyfriend. Her roommate, on the other hand, was well acquainted with dating apps, and they’d spent nights swiping through the profiles together. 

Now that she was single for the first time since she graduated from high school, her roommate and best friend had convinced her to download Tinder and have fun.

“You don’t even have to go and meet the guy, Y/N,” Jo had said with a beaming smile to encourage her when they met for coffee earlier that day, “just have a look and see if you find someone you’d want to talk to.”

She nibbled on her lip when the circle filled up entirely and the icon appeared on her screen, bright and inviting. Putting her phone down, she decided she’d create her account later, for now, downloading it was more than enough.

In her sophomore year, she broke up with her boyfriend because they couldn’t find time to be together, too busy with classes, exams, and part-time jobs. But that didn’t last long, ‘cause they got back together after three weeks. 

Those three weeks ignited a spark in her, suddenly things were more exciting to her, and she didn’t feel like she was acting how others expected her to. Y/N felt a kind of freedom that made her go on a date with her co-worker, sure they just went for a coffee together once and decided that they were better off as friends, but that small rejection made her want to make that spark disappear.

Being with Lance made things easier, they knew each other since they were little, and that meant she didn’t have to open up to let him know her flaws and fears, because he knew her like the palm of his hand. Being with him made her feel safe, even when they were apart during his first year of college since she was a year younger than him and was still in high school when he left for college, but that safety net vanished when Lance decided he wanted to spend time overseas after he graduated from college. And it was useless to wait for him if he wasn’t even sure he wanted to come back.

Eight months later, Y/N felt that spark reigniting again, making her feel like she was missing something. Ever since Lance left, she spent too much time afraid to put herself out there. How can you let someone into your life and trust them to not hurt you? After all, she trusted Lance for so long just to get hurt because they didn’t want the same things, and their paths went in different ways. But Y/N knew she couldn’t hide much longer, she wanted to go out, have fun, go on dates and meet new people, she just didn’t know how to start.

Her phone vibrated with a new notification from her best friend, and she snorted at her text.

Jo: Any matches yet heartbreaker???

If only Jo knew she still wasn’t able to bring herself into making an account. Maybe she could choose the pictures first, plan her bio, and then create it. Planning that out was definitely better than staring at the app icon.

Y/N: Not yet, but I’ll let you know ;)

After an hour of scrolling through her photos, Y/N chose five pictures where she looked decent. Hell, she looked really hot in one or two of those, and she wasn’t going to act as if that wasn’t true.

“Here goes nothing,” she muttered to herself after her account was finally set up. 

It was a strange feeling swiping through the profiles, reading their bios, and rolling her eyes at some of them. But after a few minutes, she started enjoying it, not even feeling bad if she didn’t match with a guy.

She smiled at the simple bio on her screen and swiped right, not even bothering to go through his other photos. He was cute, he seemed like he liked to have fun, and even though he was cute, he was also hot. A dangerous mix, but a really nice one.

It’s a match!

“Honey I’m home!” her best friend sang, entering  the living room.

“Shit Jo!” Y/N scolded the girl, “you scared me.”

“Why?” Jo faked an offended look, “were you sending dirty messages or something?”

“Oh shut up,” Y/N said, handing her phone over to her friend with a sheepish smile on her face, “check out my last match.”

“Okay, so he likes outdoor activities, he plays the guitar, and he has a cute smile,” her friend listed, swiping through his photos, “what are you waiting for, Y/N? Send him a message!”

“I was actually waiting for him to send one first,” she admitted, feeling her cheeks heat up, “you know I suck with conversations over chat.”

“But what if he’s waiting for you to talk to him, and you don’t do it,” Y/N looked at her friend and knew she was already making up a whole movie in her head, about how they could be soulmates, but they would never know if she didn’t send him a text.

“Fine!” She huffed and took her phone from her friend’s hands, “Do I send him a hello or what?”

“No, that’s too dry,” Jo replied, “you should ask him about where he took that picture, the one where he’s in the snow.”

She bit her bottom lip to distract herself from the fact that she felt as if her stomach was tied up in knots. He was really cute, and she had a good feeling about him, almost as if the universe was telling her to go for it, meet up with him and have fun.

Hesitating at first, she let her finger hover over the little “send” button for a few seconds, before pressing the screen and sending the text.

Y/N: Hey! Where did you take the first pic? The place looks great

“What now?” Jo looked at her with one of her eyebrows arched.

“We wait, you idiot.”

“I need to do something,” Y/N locked her phone and got up, “if I stay on that couch waiting for a reply I’m gonna end up with no nails.”

“I did your nails last night, Y/N, don’t ruin my work,” Jo complained, “why don’t you cook dinner today?, and I’ll wash the dishes, so you can text with that guy if he replies to you by the time we’re done eating.”

“I’m gonna ignore the fact that it was your turn, Jo” she pointed out but made her way to the kitchen anyway, “and you better wash, dry, and put the dishes back in the cabinets.”

Cooking was the perfect distraction, and the glass of wine she drank while they were eating helped her loosen up just enough to check her phone without feeling like she was getting back some important results.

Charlie: It’s in Canada Charlie: Sulphur Mountain Trail! Charlie: I like your smile btw

She smiled with excitement when she opened the app and saw those three messages, and just as she was about to respond, Charlie sent another one.

Charlie: How was your day??  Y/N: It was good, pretty relaxing actually Y/N: Yours?? Charlie: Great! I went hiking with a friend, so now I’m just chilling at home Y/N: I’m assuming you’re into hiking, don’t you??? Charlie: Hahaha yeah you’re right Charlie: I guess I enjoy being outside, it keeps my mind occupied

Y/N: I get it, I’m not really into outdoor activities Y/N: I mean Y/N: I don’t mind going on a hike once in a while, but I prefer reading, painting, or playing some music  Y/N: To keep my mind occupied 

Five texts in a row. Was that too much? She didn’t want to appear intense, but she also didn’t want to send just one massive text and type it for way too long.

Charlie: You play an instrument?? Charlie: I love music Y/N: Yeah I play the piano Y/N: I just don’t have one with me now, so I haven’t played in a while Charlie: Oh! That sucks! Charlie: When I moved here I think I packed my guitars first and then the rest of my stuff

Y/N let out a soft laugh at his text, he did seem like the kind of guy to pack random stuff before things that he might actually need. She should’ve done the same, she missed playing the piano, and now that she was miles away from her parents’ house it wasn’t like she could just go and play. Especially because she didn’t even know how to drive a car.

Y/N: Should’ve done the same if I’m honest Y/N: Where are you from? You said you moved here

After reading his answer to her last question, she groaned in embarrassment because it was the most obvious answer, and yet she didn’t notice it.

Charlie: I’m Canadian

She lost track of time talking to him about things they both enjoyed doing, what was their favorite movie, favorite musician, and to her surprise it was so easy to talk to him about small things like that could help you a lot to get to know another person. Y/N got startled when Jo touched her shoulder to get her attention.

“I’m off to bed, babe,” Y/N dodged when her friend tried to ruffle her hair as if she was a little kid, “don’t go to bed too late.”

“I won’t mom,” she replied jokingly, “sweet dreams, Jo.”

With a heavy sigh, Y/N typed a message, telling him that she needed to get some rest and that she was hoping they could keep talking the next day.

Charlie: Do you mind if I ask you for your number?? Charlie: I’d love to call you or FaceTime with you if you’re okay with that

“Shit, shit, shit,” she whispered, wishing her best friend hadn’t gone to bed already. Of course, she wanted to give him her number, but was she supposed to give her number to the first guy she talked to on Tinder? “fuck it, I’m doing it.”

Y/N sent him her number and after telling him goodnight, she closed the app and got ready for bed. She really had a good feeling about this whole thing, and she couldn’t put her finger on what it was, because the feeling started even before they even matched. 

Maybe it was just fate doing its work.