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#mac's hog is the focus really
charmac · 2 years
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Huh...
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Day 1: Boarded, Family, Future, Minor Crimson
“Attention all hands, now hear this! We’ve been boarded from the port side hangar! Spartan Fireteams Majestic, Crimson, and Diamond report to security stations.”
“Thank you, Roland.”
“Aye, Sir.”
Captain Thomas Lasky was not having a good day. First he’d spilled his morning coffee over a stack of requestion forms, then they’d run into a small fleet of Storm Covenant, now this. Really. What else could go wrong?
“Come about, steer course 2-7-0. Reroute non-critical power to get the port side shield back up.”
“Sir, Wolf-6 reports diminished manuvering capacity. She took a hit from a Plasma Torpedo.” His Communications Officer reported. The Infinity’s Stridents were probably what was keeping them in a decent tactical position right now.
“Have Commander Snow fall back to point X-ray and focus on providing long range fire support with her MAC.”
“Sir.”
“Roland, status of boarders?” Lasky turned towards the little yellow avatar of the A.I.
“A couple of Elites slipped the line, but they couldn’t send anyone to stop them. They cloaked and I lost track of them. Sorry, Sir.” The little A.I. looked truly disheartened.
Lasky gave him an encouraging smile. “It’s—“
And then the door blew open.
—————————
Commander Sarah Palmer was certainly enjoying her day. First she’d had an opportunity to kick Fireteam Everest’s collective ass for being late to a Wargames Sim, then they’d run into a Covvie fleet, and now she was killing Covvies. What better a day was there?
Sarah reloaded her dual magnums and vaulted over a stack of crates she’d been hiding behind. This was the best part about being a Spartan.
She fired two rapid shots into the chest of an Elite from each magnum, and ducked as it swung an energy sword at her. A quick burst of automatic gunfire signaled the expected relation from Spartan Thorne.
Note to self: Chat with Thorne more often. He’s a decent guy. Maybe I can soften the hardass reputation just a little.
Palmer rose to her full height and Spartan Kicked the Elite in the chest, sending him to the ground and breaking his shield. He attempted to reach for his pistol, but Sarah put a bullet between his eyes.
Just a little.
“Frag out!” For a designated marksman, Spartan Grant used grenades quite a lot.
Bam!
One frag equals three Jackals and a Grunt.
The red armored form of Crimson-2 sprinted forward, and then slid on her knees between the legs of a raging Hunter which turned around in an attempt to attack her.
Crack, crack!
And proceeded to collapse when the trap was sprung, two SRS99 rounds from Crimson-3’s rifle fatally puncturing its back.
Then came the- “Backblast clear!” explosion of the Lich that had dropped off the Covvies.
—————————
He was back at Corbulo.
What the hell was he doing back here?
No, Sir. I’ll be the decoy.
Lasky, no.
You sweep them from behind.
Cadet.
Lasky....
AXIOS!
Lasky!
Captain!
What..?
Get down! Get to the ‘Hog, I’ll draw their fire!
Where’d he go?!
Chief!
Cover me! Lasky, go!
Automatic rifle fire filled his ears.
Captain!
What the hell...?
“Goddamnit, TOM!”
Lasky’s eyes snapped open. Oh yeah. They were being boarded. He looked to his right, and saw Roland standing in his typical position on the command table. He’d have to thank the A.I. later. For now though?
Tom’s mind kicked into overdrive. The sailor rolled to his feet and took the lay of the land. One dead marine. Two dead crewman. Three Spec-Ops Elites. Bridge crew trying to work out of their stupor and fight back.
Let’s see if we can fix this.
Tom pulled his magnum from its holster and put a bullet into the shield of an Elite that had picked up a crewman by the throat. He certainly caught its attention, as it threw the woman to the side and started walking towards him.
The Captain pulled the trigger again, and again, then performed a combat roll to get out of range of the thing’s sword, only for its hoof to come down on his back. “Ack-!”
Fully expecting an energy sword to the back of the head, he was surprised when the Elite stumbled forward. Then his brain clocked on the MA5 fire. Glancing back, he was not surprised to see the same crewman he ‘rescued’ holding a pilfered MA5 that had come from the fallen marine.
Tom, Bud, focus please?
Right...
He blinked slightly and retrieved his fallen weapon, then opened up on the Elite. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw two more marines from the bridge guard shift crash tackle an Elite before blowing its brains out with a shotgun.
Then the entire crew turned their attention to the final Elite.
The bridge crew moved like a well-oiled machine.
Like family.
—————————
“Majestic, engage!”
Palmer took half a second to glance over at DeMarco as he barked an order. The team leader had pulled his captured energy sword from its place magnetized to his thigh, unnecessarily twirled the hilt between his fingers, and the activated it before charging into the fray.
Despite how much he annoyed her, sometimes she couldn’t argue with the Spartan’s enthusiasm. Sarah jammed another magazine into her magnum and followed him. Just like Majestic. Just like Crimson.
Like a well-oiled machine.
Like family.
They were fighting for the Infinity’s future.
—————————
Here it is, my (slightly late) @infinity-week Day 1.
I really should’ve posted this on my writing blog @am-i-right-marines but I happened to draft here.
Friend tags: @bomboclaaty @soclonely , @sw-maddie
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black-dragon1998 · 5 years
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waiting for supergirl
Part 4 ‘Out of the box way of starting a family’  : part 1- part 2-part3
Kara doesn't come home, being held up with superhero duties. witch leaves Lena to prepare Lydia for bed alone.
Thanks for reading and leave a comment if you like.
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Lena was walking through the apartment, Lydia playing in front of the TV on her playpen. On the TV was playing some child show with lots of colours to keeps the kids’ attention. Lena in the was waiting for Kara to come home.
Normally Lydia should be getting ready for bed, but Lena and Kara had a ritual for Lydia’s bedtime, and it hadn’t been broken since they started it.
Lena was a little bit conflicted about what she should do. She knew Kara was probably saving the city as Supergirl, still, she worried because she hadn’t heard from her since they shared lunch. Lena still hadn’t gone back to work, not being able to leave Lydia just jet.
Sam took over the duties at L-Corp as best she could, and Lena did the necessary paperwork from home.
“Mommy?” Lena’s attention was drawn away from her own thoughts when her daughter called. Looking up she saw Lydia running toward her, her little arms flailing to make sure her mother got her attention.
in the last week, Lydia was starting to do much better. She started to talk and play more instead of staying in her mother’s arms. She also started to trust people more, she actually started asking for her ants and Ruby.
When Lydia reached her she looked up at her with a huge smile.
“yes, a chroi?” Lena smiled back at her daughter.
“play with me?” Lydia asked pulling at her mother’s pants to make her move in the direction of the playpen.
Deciding to put away her worries for the moment and follow Lydia to her toys. To Lena’s great delight Lydia preferred to build with blocks instead of playing with dolls. Kara said it was the Luthor genes in her that made her want to build stuff. ‘just like her mommy’ Kara had teased her, and Lena could only blush and smile.
“What are we making, Angeal?” Lydia was delighted her ‘mommy’ was giving her, her full focus. Especially since her other mother wasn’t there for attention hogging. Kara usually was the one to play with Lydia. So, the little girl was going to make the best of it.
“Wobot.” Lydia clapped her hands while almost jumping up and down, Lena chuckled and pulled the little girl on her lap. A robot was something she could do.
To Lena’s own surprise she was enjoying herself and Lydia was delighted to lay with her mommy.
“Mommy look! Wobot.” Lena smiled lovingly as she saw her daughter fawn over the little block robot. She should probably make her a real robot when she was a little bit older.
“it’s lovely dear. Maybe I should take you with me to L-Corp next time. The men there could learn from you.” Lena laughed while hugging her daughter close. Lydia, in turn, hugged her mother back and couldn’t stop her giggles.
Lena lifter Lydia up so she could look her in the eyes.
“What do you say about dinner after all that building.” Lydia had gone serious as she looked back into Lena’s eyes. Proving to Lena she was positively Kara’s kid; only then could food be taken so seriously. The Luthor eyebrow raise was a rare contradiction to that.
“Mack and cheese?” Lydia was like a perfect blend between her and Kara, making the pout fired at her all the more effective.
“Alright, but only if you eat some fruits with them.” Lucky for Lena, unlike Kara Lydia likes to eat fruits and vegetables.
While the home-made Mac and cheese warmed up in the oven, Lena sliced an apple and placed it in front of her daughter. The food was devoured that is she didn’t live with an adult Kryptonian she would look up, but now it was just another thing she was used to.
Lena put their plates in the dishwasher while Lydia stayed in her high chair.
it was starting to become really late and Lydia had refused to take a nap this afternoon. This caused her to rub her eyes with a tiny fist but still being too stubborn to admit she is sleepy.
“A chroi, want to take a nap with me while we wait for mama?” Lena tried, Lydia was starting to get grumpy, making her whine and hold her hands out for Lena. Still not admitting she was tired. ‘them Luthor stubbornness.’ If Kara asked later, she so would say it wasn’t.
“Mama?” Lydia’s had her brows knitted together when her attention was brought back on the missing parent. Not wanting to a crying fit with would only leave ger grumpier.
“Mama will be here when you wake up.” Lena tried. Lydia vigorously shook her head. Lena seeing the tears welling up she acted fast. Sometimes you had to give in as a parent.
“not even if we sleep in the big bed.” Normally Lena would refrain from letting Lydia sleep in between her and Kara. Keeping it as a last resort, like now.
“Mama!” Lydia started to shout to getter with the first tears. Rubbing her temple’s, she went for another approach.
“How about this. Why don’t we watch ‘The Lion King’ while we wait for mama to get home?” Lena was gasping at her last straws with this. She already picked Lydia out off her high chair, rubbing her back soothingly. Hoping the little one would fall asleep while watching the movie.
“Cuddles?” Lydia asked shyly.
“How could I say no to my favourite cuddle buddy.” Lena smiled. Both were giggling the whole way to the bedroom. Having thrown  routine out of the window, Lena laid Lydia in the middle of the bed. putting a few pillows around her, preventing her from fall of the bed.
“Okay baby, look at me.” Lena tried to get her daughters full attention, who was distracted by the pillows around her. When two big blue eyes looked at her and smiled Lena continued.
“LION KING!” Lydia clapped her hands together giggling.
“yes, yes but first we are going to put on PJ’s okay.” Lena slits her forefinger over her daughter’s chubby cheek to keep her attention.
“yeah PJ’s.”
“A chroi, that means you have to stay here on the bed while I go and get them, okay.” Lydia nodded.
“Can you tell what to do?” Lena asks raising her own Luthor eyebrow.
“Stay here and wait for mommy.” Lydia answered proudly.
“Good girl, now wait for mommy to come back.” Lena stood up and made her way toward the other bedroom opposite the master bedroom. She had almost made it to the door when she heard yelling.
“Mommy! Don’t forget Leo and Luna.”
“Okay, a chroi.” Leo and Luna being her daughters' stuffed lion and wolf. Lydia had noticed that both her name and her mother’s name started with the same letter, so she wanted her ‘friends’ to have the same. Both Kara and Lena found it adorable, as did the super friends.
In the bedroom, she quickly took a new pair of PJs’. Picking the one that resembled Kara’s new suit, Lena also didn’t forget the stuffed animals.
When she got back inside the master bedroom Lydia was laying exactly where Lena left her.
“good girl.” Lena praised, picking her off the bed and kissing her cheek. Walking into the bathroom, she changed Lydia quickly. Lena herself changed into one of Kara’s hoodies she liked to steal.
“Ready for the movie?” Lydia nodded in the crook of her neck, but Lena didn’t miss how her daughter rubbed her eyes again and stifled a yawn.
It didn’t take long for the two to settle on the bed. Lena leaning lightly against the headboard with a couple of pillows propped behind her back to support her. Lydia nestled herself in her mommy’s front with head resting on Lena’s shoulder.
pulling the blankets up to Lydia’s chin she pressed play for the movie and waited.
When Kara finally made it back home, she was met with silence. The apartment was dark, and Kara was a bit confused, normally Lena would be waiting for her. This made Kara scared that Lena was mad at her for not letting her know where she was.
Aldo her worries were washed away when she entered her shared bedroom. Lydia had fallen asleep and turned so that she was snuggling into Lena. Her stuffed animals squeezed between the two off them. Lena in her turn had also fallen asleep, having curled around Lydia.
Not wanting to wake them she floated into the bathroom and changed quickly. Standing in front of the bed Kara felled conflicted. She wanted to join her family, but she also didn’t want to disturb them.
Lena noticed someone had entered the bedroom, Kara seemed to fill a room with a calming presence that put Lena at ease.
“Darling?” Lena’s voice sounded groggy from sleep.
“I’m here baby.” Kara answers sitting on her side off the bed.
“you're finally home.” Lena couldn’t help but smile.
“Yeah, sorry that I haven’t let you know where I was.” Kara said sheepishly.
“’s okay. Happy your home.” Said, half back to sleep again. Lena rolled over just enough for Kara to slip in beside her. Kara didn’t waste any time doing just that and hugging her two-favorite people into her.
Lena lets out a happy sight and rested her head on Kara’s shoulder. Kara fell asleep with a smile on her face.
Kara was woken up abruptly by a small body jumping on her chest.
“MAMA! MAMA! Wake up, mommy is making pancakes.” Lydia creamed loudly.
‘I’m up. I’m up.” Kara grunted out not opening her eyes just jet.
“Iska could you be so kind and move your knees a little.” Kara finally opened her eyes to look at her daughter who had her knees planted in her ribs and both hands on her cheeks. Not understanding the question, she just repeated her excitement.
“Pancakes!”
Using her super speed Kara hoisted Lydia up in her arms and jumped off the bed.
“Alright little monster, let see what mommy is doing.” Kara chuckled while tickling Lydia’s tummy, making the girl shriek in laughter.
“no, mama don’t. no tickling.” Lydia breathed art between laughs. Both were still laughing when they med Lena in the kitchen.
“Morning.” Lena looked up from her stack of pancakes she made.
“Morning,” Kara answered when she slung her free arm around Lena and kissed her cheek.
Taking in the scene in front of her Lena couldn’t help feel her heart swell with love. The sudden emotions caused her to tear up a bit.
“I hope this never changes.” Lena whispered in a small voice in Kara’s neck. Kara having heard her gave her waist a small squeeze.
“I hope so too.”
Part 5
want to support me Buy me a Ko-fi
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shootwinterfest · 5 years
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WINTER MYSTERY - NEW STORY from ASLEEPINAWELL for Shoot Secret Santa!
Winter Mystery by @asleepinawell
also here on AO3! 
"The snow is really coming down now," Reese said as he shut the door behind him.
Shaw inched slightly closer to the fireplace to escape the cold air that had invaded the room when Reese had opened the door. "At this rate we're going to be stuck here tomorrow." 
"At least tomorrow," Root agreed as she swept into the room. She handed a mug down to Shaw before settling in front of the fire herself on the other side of Bear. "The Machine says the snow plows won't be able to get through up here until Tuesday."
Shaw took a cautious sip of her hot cocoa. Yep, definitely spiked, thank god. If she was going to spend the next few days crammed into a cabin in the middle of nowhere with the whole team, then she was going to need some alcohol. 
"How're we supposed to help our number if we're stuck here?" Fusco asked from the chair in the corner. He'd tried to sit by the fire earlier, but Shaw had sent him away for hogging all the heat. Root only got fire privileges because she'd resorted to cocoa bribery.
"Well, the good news is that our number is snowed in as well," Root said. "It'll be hard for anyone to get to them with all the roads closed." She reached across Bear to try to steal Shaw's mug, but Shaw saw her coming and pulled it back out of reach with a warning glare.
"Good thing I packed some extra snacks," Shaw mused as she sipped her cocoa. "The freezer here is stocked full of nothing but microwavable mac and cheese. Gross."
"What'd you bring?" Reese asked, a little too innocently.
Shaw's eyes narrowed in suspicion. "None of your business and no, I'm not sharing. You should have thought of it yourself."
"You're not sharing?" Fusco asked, outraged. "We could all starve here, you know?"
"Way too much shitty mac and cheese for that to happen," Shaw assured him. She eyed the others, looking for any suspicious expressions. Maybe she should hide her food stash before she went to bed, just in case.
"Don't worry, sweetie," Root said, patting her on the knee. "There's only one snack I want in this house."
Shaw choked on her cocoa.
---------------------------------
It wasn't that Shaw hadn't trusted the Machine when she'd assured them (through Root) that the house was well-stocked with food in the event of them getting stuck, it was that she hadn't trusted the Machine's taste in food, a fear which had turned out to be correct. Thus the small pack full of supplies Shaw had brought for herself. None of it was too fancy: coffee, tea, and cocoa packets, trail mix, a couple types of jerky, a chocolate bar, some pop tarts, cookies, marshmallows (for the cocoa), and a bottle of whiskey. Certainly not fancy dining material, but still, it was stuff with more flavor and texture than frozen dinners and tap water.
"You know, if you hide that somewhere I won't be able to make you surprise spiked chocolate again," Root pointed out once they'd retired to the room they were sharing.
Shaw hesitated over the bag. Root had a point. But…. "That sounds like something someone would say if they were planning to steal my food."
Root paused in mid-stroke of brushing her hair to cast a disdainful look at Shaw. "Sweetie, I'm not interested in your pop tarts."
"That's just what you want me to think." She zipped the pack up and looked around the little bedroom. It was the largest bedroom in the place, but it was still tiny and there wasn't anywhere obvious to hide anything.
Root set aside her brush and sat down on top of the heavy wool blanket on the bed. "When you're done being paranoid about your snacks, come to bed and I'll show you what I'm actually interested in."
That was too good an offer to pass up and Shaw ended up shoving her pack under the bed. If someone wanted to steal it they'd have to get in here without waking her up and good fucking luck with that.
She did make one detour before joining Root, though, to twitch one of the curtains aside and look out at the snow falling.
"We're going to be lucky if we can even get the front door open tomorrow." She could barely see the trees through the heavy snowfall.
"Being stuck here for a few days doesn't have to be the worst thing ever," Root said as Shaw shut the curtains. "I can think of plenty of ways to pass the time."
"Be a lot better if we weren't sharing a tiny cabin with the boys," Shaw said. She walked back to the edge is the bed and, when Root tugged on her arm, let herself be pulled down into the warm blankets and a tangle of limbs. "Guess it's their own damn fault if they didn't bring earplugs though," she decided.
"They'll get over it," Root agreed.
They were both thoroughly exhausted by the time they finally fell asleep. Root, always the late sleeper, might have slept until noon if she hadn't been awoken by Shaw's outraged yell. When she rolled over to see what the fuss was, she found Shaw standing next to the bed looking grim.
"My pack is gone."
---------------
Root was tired, cold, and (because of the first two things) grumpy. She'd had a lovely evening with Shaw in their isolated snow-bound cabin, gotten to go to sleep in a very warm, soft bed, but then been rudely awoken and dragged downstairs to the living room with the boys and accused of petty thievery. The only upside to the whole thing was that Shaw was currently being unbearably adorable in her efforts to unmask the supposed criminal.
"The facts are these," Shaw stated as she paced in front of the fireplace. "Last night I put my own personal pack with my possessions in it under my bed."
"Our bed," Root corrected.
Shaw rolled her eyes. Her hair was still messy from sleeping but pulled back in a loose ponytail, strands escaping everywhere, and her whole face still looked soft from sleep despite her current level of focus. It contrasted nicely with her stern tone and Root couldn't help but smile fondly while she watched her even if it made Shaw look more annoyed.
"Fine, the bed Root and I both slept in."
There was a soft snicker from behind her in the room. John, probably. Neither he nor Fusco had been awake when Shaw had announced the mandatory team meeting.
"Despite the fact I didn't hear anyone come into the room all night, this morning, my pack had mysteriously vanished. Since we're currently snowed in at an isolated cabin, the only viable suspects are the people in this room."
"You seriously think one of us took your food?" Fusco asked. "Seems to me that the most likely suspect was the person already in the room with you then."
Shaw turned her suspicious stare on Root for half a second and then shook her head. "Everyone is a suspect right now. The door was open this morning when I woke up and it was definitely shut when I fell asleep."
"Oh, that part was definitely my fault," Root admitted. "Bear was scratching at the door and I let him in. I left the door cracked in case he wanted to leave."
"He was?" Shaw looked down at where Bear was snoozing near her feet. "I don't remember hearing him."
"Yes, well, you were pretty worn out," Root said, perhaps a bit smugly.
"If the door was already open, then anyone could easily have snuck in," Shaw said. "Or Root could have smuggled the pack out when she let Bear in."
"Or Bear could have stolen it," Root pointed out. 
"Bear would never! You take that back!"
John cleared his throat. "It's six am. Can we go back to sleep and sort this out later? You can search the place while we're passed out so you know no one will be eating your stash."
"No one is sleeping until the thief comes forward and returns what they took." Shaw turned her full attention to John. "Where were you last night?"
John was sprawled on the couch wearing pajamas that looked like...a suit. "In my room with headphones on until I fell asleep. I only left it to use the bathroom once."
"And do you have any way to prove that?"
"How would I do that?"
Shaw looked back at Root. "I'd like to call the Machine as a witness."
It was Root's turn to roll her eyes. Shaw was being very cute with this whole righteous detective act, but she was really tired and would rather go back to bed and continue using Shaw as a heat source. "She's been having a hard time maintaining a clear signal with the storm, and also there's no cameras set up here so Her information would be limited."
"Reese and Fusco both have phones."
"True."
"Skynet spies on our phones?" Fusco asked in horror.
"There's a total of twenty three different organizations spying on the average phone at any given time. Trust me, She's not the one you need to worry about. She doesn't care about the websites you visit that you delete from your phone history." Root smirked at the terror on his face. "Private browsers tabs aren't really private, Lionel. How long have you been working with us now?"
John looked thoroughly amused by Fusco's discomfort, so Root added, "And John is no exception, though I'm disappointed in his taste." She didn't have any clue what either of them looked at since the Machine actually believed in privacy for some reason, but she must have hit a nerve because the smile fell off John's face.
"None of this matters," Shaw cut in. She pointed at Fusco. "What did you do last night?"
Fusco was bundled up in a threadbare purple bathrobe in an armchair in the corner. He looked even more tired than Root felt.
"Me? I tried to get my beauty sleep and regretted thinking Reese was kidding about the earplugs thing."
"And you didn't leave your room at all?" Shaw asked.
"No, I...wait, I did. Got up to use the bathroom some time in the night, no clue when. I did see someone else up and about but it was dark and they were at the far end of the hall so it could have been anyone."
"The far end of the hall, as in near the door to my room?" Shaw asked. "Did you see how tall they were?"
Fusco squinted at her. "Yeah, now that I think of it they were really short. Maybe about five foot three. Sound like anyone here?"
"Maybe you stole your own food in your sleep, Shaw," John said, amusement in his voice. 
Shaw crossed her arms, her biceps flexing in a threatening way that caused both the boys to stop laughing and Root to have a sudden shift in reasons for wanting to go back to bed.
"This cabin isn't that big and there's nowhere to hide," Shaw said with way more icy intensity than Root thought was strictly necessary for the situation even if it was extremely hot. "It's only a matter of time before I find out who took it." She turned and headed back up the stairs, leaving the others in uneasy silence.
"Shorty really likes her pop tarts, huh?" Fusco asked.
"And how did you know she had pop tarts, Lionel?" Root asked with a smile that was mostly teeth.
"Because I saw when she bought them at the rest stop on the way here," Fusco said, trying to inch his chair away. "Why don't you go talk to her instead of threatening me? You know none of us did it."
"I know nothing of the sort." She stood up and brushed herself off. "I suggest that if either of you are responsible, that you make her pack reappear before she comes back downstairs."
"And how do we know you aren't the one who took it?" John asked.
"You don't."
--------------------
Shaw returned to her room after she finished her second sweep of Reese's room. Root had come upstairs while she was away and was fast asleep in bed again, curled up on her side under all the thick blankets with Bear next to her. The whole scene was kind of endearing despite Shaw's general state of annoyance.
It wasn't like a bunch of junk food even mattered that much; it was the principle of the thing. She doubted Root was the culprit, even if she would have had the easiest access. Though she wouldn't put it past Root to cook up some trouble to keep her entertained while they were stuck. She'd probably consider it some sort of cute gift or something.
There were several feet of snow on the ground outside now and the house was chilly as fuck and Shaw was tempted to crawl into bed next to Root and sleep in the warmth and forget about this whole thing, but.... But she really wanted some goddamn coffee and the almost-acceptable instant coffee she'd packed was worlds better than the shit in the kitchen. 
She decided it was time to be practical about the whole thing. The next step any sane and logical human would take at this point would clearly be to draw a detailed diagram of the crime scene and map out all the possibilities.
Root knocked her map on the floor when she rolled over fifteen minutes later. Shaw cursed and reached down to retrieve it. It wasn't her fault that there'd been nowhere else to spread out her research. 
"Sameen? What time is it?" Root still looked cranky and her eyes weren't quite open yet.
"It's nine." 
"That's still too early," Root grumbled. She rolled over so her head butted up against Shaw's leg and cuddled grumpily against her.
"You tell me who took my food and we can nap all day." That was a lie, but Shaw felt entitled. She was the victim here.
"If I admit to it, can we go back to sleep? It was terrible of me, and you can spank me later."
Tempting for several reasons, but…. "Did you actually?"
"No." The one word was infused with infinite crankiness.
"Then no deal."
Root sighed and then opened her eyes. "Fine, let's get to the bottom of this then." 
"That's what I've been saying--" Shaw trailed off at the look on Root's face. 
Root flung back the covers and jammed her feet into her bunny slippers with murderous intensity. Shaw watched in fascination as she pulled her oversized fluffy robe (pink, with a hood that had bunny ears to match her slippers) around herself and tied the sash like she was preparing for war. She grabbed her taser from the nightstand and raised an eyebrow at Shaw. 
"Well, are you coming or not?"
Shaw trailed after her, half-impressed, half-turned-on, as she hunted down both the boys and corralled them back into the living room. 
"Let's start with the obvious suspect first," Root said, her voice full of that cheerful homicidal glee that did things to Shaw. "Lionel."
She rounded on Fusco, tapping her taser against one palm while grinning at him.
"Why am I the obvious suspect?" Fusco protested, looking around nervously. 
"You're a police officer," Root said as if the answer was obvious. "Now, where did you put Shaw's pack?"
"I didn't--"
The taser crackled threateningly in Root's hand.
Fusco looked at Shaw desperately. "Hey, can you maybe keep your homicidal girlfriend from killing me?"
Shaw shrugged. "Root does what she wants. You should probably answer her question." She'd stop Root before she could do anything permanent.
"I told you, I didn't take it! Sure, I thought about it. You were so uptight about it who wouldn't have?" The taser buzzed violently again and Fusco leaned so far back in his chair he almost tilted over backwards. "I didn't touch it though! I'm not crazy enough to go into that room. Who knows what I would have walked in on?"
Root paused and tilted her head. "That's actually believable. He is pretty spineless."
"Hey!"
On a different day, Shaw might have defended Fusco from the insult, but he'd just admitted to thinking about stealing her pack to annoy her so he was on his own.
"That leaves you." Root turned on John with a bright smile. He failed to look concerned.
"Why would I take it? I actually like the microwave dinners."
"John, you're going to need a more believable excuse than that."
"No, that actually checks out," Shaw said. "He has the worst taste ever."
"Well, if none of us took it then where is it?" Root asked.
"Hey, why are you suddenly free from suspicion?" Fusco demanded.
Root raised her taser threateningly, but Shaw waved her down, suddenly concerned by something else.
"Where's Bear?"
A quick search of all their rooms turned up no Belgian Malinois. 
"Did he get outside?" Shaw wondered. She hoped he was okay out there. His paws might get cold.
"Maybe he's in the basement," Reese suggested.
"There's a basement?" This was news to her.
"Yeah, it's kind of hidden away, but I had to go down there to fight the furnace last night."
"Show me."
The door to the stairs down was hard to spot in a tiny alcove off the kitchen and Shaw had overlooked it last night. The door was also open.
"I think the mystery is about to be solved," Reese said as he led the way down.
The basement was a small, dirty room with a single lightbulb hanging from the ceiling and in the middle of the floor was Bear, chewing happily on a piece of Shaw's jerky. Her backpack was lying ripped open nearby, contents strewn about the floor. Bear wagged his tail nervously when they approached.
"Looks like someone was a very naughty a doggy," Root said.
"It's not his fault," Shaw protested ad she surveyed the damage. "He must have been hungry. Poor guy."
"So we get tasered, but the dog gets a pass?" Fusco grumbled.
"Let's go back upstairs," Reese said hurriedly before Shaw could react.
Shaw bent to see what was left. Fortunately Bear seemed to have ignored the chocolate and cookies and other things that might be bad for a dog's stomach, though there was drool all over everything.
"You're a smart boy, aren't you?" she said, scratching him behind the ears.
"Maybe we should bring everything out of the dirty basement," Root suggested. She had stayed behind when the other two left. "He can keep eating your food in the kitchen."
"Yeah, okay."
Twenty minutes later, Shaw was back upstairs and in bed with a mug of hot chocolate (the cocoa mix had been declared salvageable). Root was mostly asleep next to her again and Bear was at the foot of the bed snoring. Life was okay again.
Shaw felt content enough that she even allowed Root to snuggle up next to her without complaint.
"Sameen, I have a confession to make."
"Hmm?"
"I may have seen Bear take your pack last night."
"What? Why the hell didn't you say anything?"
"I was going to, but your little detective routine was adorable and then I got to threaten the boys and that's always fun."
Shaw was tempted to pour her chocolate on Root, but that would have been a waste.
"Well maybe you get to sleep on the couch the rest of the time we're here."
"Is that really what you want?" Root snuggled closer and brushed her lips across Shaw's neck with just the tiniest hint of teeth.
"Maybe," mumbled Shaw without much conviction.
"I'll make it up to you if you let me sleep for another hour."
"Fine. Better be a really good apology."
"Mmm." Root was already drifting back off, her head on Shaw's shoulder. 
Shaw sipped her hot chocolate, listened to the soft sounds of Root breathing, and watched the snow fall outside the window. All things considered, it was a pretty nice day.
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Free Vst Effect Pack
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I guess you would have to agree with me that the best way to polish your vocal recording or a vocal sample is to sprinkle some effects, just like the way you would sprinkle a reasonable amount of ingredients on your food. If done right, it sounds delicious right, yum yum 😉
Improve your projects with quality free vst instruments & effects for download. Vst presets / patches and free synth vst plugins available for download. Vst4you: Big Source Of Free Vst's Loops And More Good Stuff To Start Create Music. 2Packs From last 2 successful fx alien loops releases, we are giving youopportunity to buy 2 packs.
Our list of the 55 best free VST plugins encompasses tons of categories, namely: best Guitar VSTs, best Synth VSTs, best VST plugins for vocals, bass VSTs best drum VSTs and a horde of slick effects – that one can download for FREE!
IZotope Ozone Imager. The Ozone Imager is an essential free VST plugin for trap beats. As the name suggests, this is an imaging tool you use to control your track's stereo width. To make a professional sounding track, you must control your stereo width. Commonly, your low frequencies are narrow, in mono, while you typically place your higher frequencies wide.
Vocal effects are no exception to the ingredient perspective, you need to add a reasonable amount of effects to make them sound lively, and enjoyable to the listeners.
Best Free Drum VST My mother always told me “march to the beat of your own drum”, but I guess she was wrong, because I found a bunch of really good free drum vsts. Amongst them, is the T.REX 606, a classic sound that could have easily cost hundreds of dollars, but for some reason is free. Best Free Synth VST Plugins Dexed by Digital Sub Urban Dexed is a Free multi platform and multi format frequency modulation Synth which is based on, or closely modeled to, the Yamaha DX7. You can download it here.
Don’t get me wrong, I ain’t saying you should stack effects upon effects on your vocal samples, too much of everything is bad. That said, let us look at the best free awesome VST effects plugin in the music production scene.
Let’s ride on…
Page Contents
5.) g200kg – KeroVee
10.) MGF – TimeWarp
1.) AegeanMusic – PitchProof
If you haven’t heard of PitchProof, then, you are definitely missing out, this is like the secret tool I use on Vocals but it wasn’t even developed for Vocal, it was actually designed to work on monophonic signals such as guitar solos, but I’ll give you a tip on how I have been using it:
You don’t want to apply it in realtime, what you should do instead is to first select the key of the harmony, then you turn the Blend knob all the way to the right; wet e.g:
Export the vocal result, add whatever effects plugins you gat on your toolbox (vocal, flangers, etc) to spice up the pitched vocal, and then stack it on top of the original vocal. Boom, you have something unique!
Note: You don’t have to always push it all through the wet side as this might cause artifacts, just experiment and stick with what works for you.
You can even export more vocal, and maybe this time, you can try by reducing the detune knob, anyways, experiment until you get your preferred test.
That said, let’s look at some of the features of PitchProof:
The Blend control knob would let you adjust the level of pitch shift, while the Pitch drop-down menu lets you select pitches like +7 or -7, or harmonies which are intelligent pitch-shift effects.
Moreover, there are also some options at the bottom of the PitchProof plugin which give you the option to switch between stereo and mono; mono could save your CPU, while the stereo option could cause a resource hog if used on multiple inserts.
Transient Fix can be switch on or off to spice things up a little!
Possible Harmony Options:HarmonyInfo2ndDissonant harmonies3rdThe Typical Major/minor Chord Harmony4thThe same as the +5 semitones setting except a few notes are flat.5thThe Same as The +7 Semitones Setting Except the Last Note of The Major Scale Is Flat Making It “diminished”.6thA nice-sounding alternative to typical harmony intervals.7thDissonant 7th Chord Sounds.
2.) Auburn Sounds – Graillon
This is an autotune VST plugins designed and developed by Auburnsounds. This plugin is superb in the way it handles pitch correction.
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It not only supports pitch correction but supports the generation of throat sounds, making octave sounds, enriching, and enhancing vocal expressiveness.
Also, there is a pitch shift parameter that transposes vocals up and down in octaves and semitones.
Features:
Free Vst Effect Packs
Pitch Shifter cleanly transposes a voice up and down and has been optimized for voice.
Pitch Correction module brings an immediate robotic sound, while the Bitcrusher addition softly adds sparkles to the mix.
Freemium
System Requirements
Available as VST, VST2, AAX, and Audio Unit plugin for macOS and Windows platform.
Download Graillion Auto-Tune Plugin
3.) JHudStudio – Vocal King
Vocal King helps glue the vocal in a mix, and it comes preloaded cool parameters, that could help in customizing the audio signal of a vocal track.
The Pres Compressor knob helps in bringing out the clarity of a vocal, so, by turning up the gain of the Pres Comp brings out the presence in the vocal along with giving it a smooth compression. On the other hand, the Low cut, Tighten, and the Bass knob compliment the Pres Comp in taking out muddy frequencies without the vocal sounding too thin.
I also love playing with the Crispy knob as it sprinkles some sparkles to the audio signal.
Features:
Help vocals to stand out in a mix by giving them amazing presence, clarity, and compression. Can easily work on any other content.
Acts like are preamp giving the signal a strong boost.
Easy to use interface for fast results.
Easy to read meters
Very CPU efficient compared to other types of plugins.
It can be used on many other audio sources as well.
System Requirements
Vocal King supports MAC/Windows/32bit/64bit/VST2/VST3/AU. Supports MAC OS X 10.7 / Windows 7 and higher. Older systems may not work.
4.) Sonic Anomaly – Vola
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Vola is a Voice Optimized Leveling Amplifier made for broadcast voice dynamics processing, it also works with different kinds of audio material, like drums, percussive instrument, and synth pads.
Free Sound Effects Vst
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This fantastic tool is solely for cleaning up sound files but can be used for extreme compression effects as well.
Features
Real-time Visual Metering for changes in dynamics
Upwards & downwards compression, each separately adjustable.
Stats Display and more compression settings
Download Vola Vst (Windows)
Download Vola Jsfx (Windows and Mac)
5.) g200kg – KeroVee
This is a pitch correction VST plugin tool and has strengthened to support natural pitch correction.
This tool is handy and can perform different and various types of voice effects, for example, a conversion of the male voice to a female voice and vice versa.
KeroVee comes bundled with useful parameters for the effectiveness of the auto-tuning process, Parameter includes:
Scale Button: This is for specifying the scale you want to tune. Setting a wrong scale would result in an awful result, in a simple sentence, Know your scale before you go into this one
TuneSpeed: This will allow you to set the speed of correcting the pitch.
Nuance: This is one of the best and lovely parameters, you can use this to set a fine vibrato of the original sound, use this to create all sorts of weird effects.
Amount: Set to zero (0) if you want no correction, setting to 100 will result in full correction of the pitch
and many more parameters like Transpose option, master volume, etc.
System Requirements
A compatible host program that supports the VST formats
6.) Martin Eastwood – Duet
Have you heard those natural double effects in some tracks! Do you wonder how those are created? I guess yes 😉
Let me introduce to you – Duet, a double-tracking effect designed to enhance your audio sample be it vocal or even instruments, Duet is well capable of sparkling them up. The way Duet work is by pitch-shifting both the left and right inputs individually using a novel synchronous overlap and add technique, allowing pitch to be manipulated in real-time while still maintaining the time duration of the audio.
One thing I love about Duet is the way it can accurately create the illusion of multi-voices and adds varied texture to the mix. Experiment with Duet to see how it works.
Note: This is only available for Window
7.) MaxSynths – DSP-2
DSP-2 is designed with an intelligent Dynamic Processor, a 4-band equalizer fixed on vocal key frequencies, a saturator, and a room emulator based on the Schroeder reverberator. DSP is super simple to use and can serve basically all your vocal processing needs, again, experiment and keep experimenting to get the best settings that would soothe your need.
Features:
Intelligent Dynamic Processor (IDP).
4 different automatic operative modes.
Selectable compression ratio.
Saturator with three different operation modes.
EQ fixed on vocal key frequencies.
Room emulator based on the Schroeder reverb model.
Transparent increment of the perceived volume level.
High precision input/output VU-meter.
Low CPU usage.
8.) Distorque – Azurite
Azurite is a vocal effect by Distorque which is built for multi-voice chorus with a focus on rich sounds and versatile controls.
According To Distorque:
My goal in designing it was to make as flexible a chorus as possible without losing great tones and ease of use. The result is an effect that will be handy for producers, guitarists, and glitch lovers alike.
One of the great features of this plugin is the way you can create multiple simultaneous voices. Each of these voices can be further customized with their own delay line that is modulated by a separate LFO. Adding multiple voices leads to a thicker, smoother, and less wobbly tone. It also makes vivid stereo spreading possible with a mono signal.
The voice control helps you to choose how many voices you want for the chorus, e.g one, two, four, or eight.
Features:
Stereo or mono operation.
Colour control emulates vintage analog choruses.
2 band EQ.
LFO tempo sync.
Feedback control allows for flanger sounds.
27 built-in presets.
Delay time from 0.2ms to 200ms.
7 LFO shapes: Sine, Triangle, Sawtooth, Ramp, Exponential, Inverse Exponential, and Random.
Spread control for a stereo widening of a mono signal.
Control randomizer.
Other controls: Depth, Speed, Wet Mix, Output, Separation, Dry Delay.
Note: This is only available for Window
Download Azurite Win 32 VST / Win 64 VST
9.) TerryWest – EasyVox
EasyVox contains a bunch of tool for vocal processing, such as:
Dynamic mono vocal compressor/limiter/enhancer
Three bands equalizer
Autogain and Pre-Limiter
Auto Noisegate
Auto Band-off
Three EQ models
Fine EQ option
EQ activity/bypass LEDs
Low-Mid-Hicut
Vocal Doubler effect
Pre in/Post out gain
In/out/reduction meters
Donate To The Developer, It helps him to build more exciting plugins
Note: This is only available for Window
10.) MGF – TimeWarp
Last on our list is Timewarp by MGF, which is a vibrato effect with 2 LFOs which can pan the pitch modulation amount for a stereo effect.
Features:
Vst Effect Plugins
Sine, Triangle, Saw and random waves with control over the shape and smoothing.
Optional 4x upsampling and a smooth modulation algorithm ensure clean sound with minimal aliasing. Normal quality
saves CPU and sounds brighter but less silky.
2 different interpolation algorithms are available (ALG).
Fast modulation settings possible and encouraged
That is it, Good luck and have fun with music!
Useful Related posts:
Native Instruments MOD PACK takes three classic modulation effects – chorus, flanger and phaser – and adds features never seen before. Each offers exciting new creative possibilities as well as stunningly convincing vintage-style results, making MOD PACK a must-have upgrade from the rest of modulation effects.
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Native Instruments Choral: Drawing sonic inspiration from some of the most iconic chorus effects from the past 40 years – including iconic stands and unison synth effects. Add width, movement, sparkle and shimmer to any signal, or take advantage of the new Scatter feedback mode. This avoids unpleasant metallic sounds. Instead, a completely new effect similar to reverb is created. The classic effects contained a small number of settings – On, Off and Type are usually the only controls. Our plugin offers many customizable options. The number of voices can be set gradually from one to three, the sync speed can be manually changed, as well as the modulation speed, volume, mix, delay time, stereo width and feedback.
Free Vst Instrument Pack
Native Instruments Flair: Flips the classic head flanger effect. FLAIR adds a revolutionary new Voices mode that uses multiple delay lines to create custom harmonic flanger layers and resonances. It even has 24 chord settings, offering different chords and note intervals. In addition to revolutionary features, FLAIR is capable of rich tape saturation and pedal flanger, offering all the parameters you’d normally expect, such as tempo-synchronized pitch modulation.
Free Vst Effects Pack
Native Instruments Phasis: Offers endless phasing sounds – adding movement, soul, and creative magic to any signal. PHASIS takes inspiration from the classic phaser but adds powerful new features. For example, the Spread control changes the step spacing of a vocal style effect passage. Ultra Power Mode brings modulation to ultra-high speeds, creating unique FM-esque tones. The plugin adjusts the peak density and Q-factor of the slices in the spectrum and whether it is set to one value, applied in real time or with automation, or reversed with the “Invert” button, “Spread” provides a new effect for both the phasing process and vowel sounds of vocals. With its powerful stereo spread function, advanced sync options and all the controls, what you’d expect from a professional phaser, PHASIS is already a formidable modulation device, but the ULTRA parameter takes the effect to a new area of ​​application. ULTRA boosts the maximum modulation rate from 8.37 kHz to an incredible 477.3 kHz, which generates unusual FM-style effects never heard before and is able to turn even white noise into immersive sound.
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hunterzone435 · 3 years
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Utorrent Web Free Download For Windows 10
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Download uTorrent is a lightweight torrent download client for the BitTorrent network with lower resource consumption. Taking advantage of the larger bandwidth of modern networks, the same developers have released uTorrent Web a client especially conceived for the download of multimedia files. Watch and listen whilst you download. The official µTorrent® (uTorrent) torrent client for Windows, Mac, Android and Linux- uTorrent is the #1 BitTorrent download client on desktops worldwide. Download this app from Microsoft Store for Windows 10, Windows 10 Mobile, Windows 10 Team (Surface Hub), HoloLens, Xbox One. See screenshots, read the latest customer reviews, and compare ratings for uTorrent - Torrents Downloader.
Download uTorrent Web for Windows now from Softonic: 100% safe and virus free. More than 15069 downloads this month. Download uTorrent Web latest version 2021. ESET lists Web Companion as a reference and that leads to Ad-Aware's Web Companion application. Whether that program has been offered as part of uTorrent's installation is unclear at this point. A test download and installation revealed the following: uTorrent Classic downloaded fine in Microsoft Edge on Windows 10 with Windows Defender enabled.
Compact BitTorrent free client with expansive capabilities. Download uTorrent for free and enjoy!
uTorrent is an efficient BitTorrent client for Windows from the originator of the BitTorrent protocol. Most of the features present in other BitTorrent clients are present in uTorrent, including bandwidth prioritization, scheduling, RSS auto-downloading, and Mainline DHT. Additionally, uTorrent supports the protocol encryption joint specification and peer exchange. Unlike many torrent clients, it does not hog valuable system resources--typically using less than 6MB of memory, allowing you to use the computer as if it weren't there at all.
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0uTorrent is the result of trying to keep this tiny Bit Torrent client small while adding several new features and working on the product under the hood. The team calls the new features 'insanely powerful', we can't help but agree.
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uTorrent is the brainchild of the team over at BitTorrent, Inc and has become one of the most (if not the most) downloaded Bit Torrent client on the web of all time. uTorrent can thank its success over the last couple of years because of the lightweight aspect of the program that just makes it work really well without crashing or causing slowdowns.
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Slowdowns? No way. uTorrent is also one of the fastest clients when it comes to download speed. Like any other good torrent client, uTorrent also does well with uploading speeds and overall does a great job of traffic management. Users of the client are also able to use prioritizing and put any files they want to the front of the line.
The client also recently underwent a major overhaul and the new version sports a new and minimalist look. We thought the older versions we minimal, but the upgrade provides access to several new features such as social networking (sharing comments and ratings), feature hiding (making it even more minimalist in appearance), a portability mode and some improvements on stability.
Though the client has always been tiny and lightweight, they have even managed to bring in some improvements to the client with regards to speed and web seeding adding to the already impressive reliability of the client.
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Feature Hiding: Minimizing parts of the µT interface with a click.
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Stability etc.: µTorrent 3 also offers under-the-hood improvements including a focus on stability as well as improved Web seeding to add speed and reliability to the process of finding the original source of a single-source file.
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This download is licensed as freeware for the Windows (32-bit and 64-bit) operating system on a laptop or desktop PC from p2p filesharing software without restrictions. uTorrent 3.5.5.45798 is available to all software users as a free download for Windows.
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At Watford
Rating: G
Genre: Angst (sorta)
Word count:768
Summary:  It's fifth year and Simon is sure Baz is plotting. Even at his football practice.
Read on AO3
AN:  Alright I'm gonna try this. These probably won't be too long, but they'll be something. I will try to do all of them but I'm also a very busy university student with exams and finals (hahahaha kill me plz). Chapter titles are prompts given. Hope you all enjoy these!
Simon
He’s plotting and I fucking know it. Penny and Agatha think I’m crazy but they’re wrong. He’s doing something. And I will watch his stupid evil arse until I figure it out.
I should be studying or something. My grades are truly abysmal this term. But I’m going to stay right here in the stands, leg jittering and sword hand ready, until the end of football practice. I’ve been following him everywhere. Out of class, the catacombs, and here. He will not shake me.
The team is huddled around Coach Mac, probably discussing game strategy. I focus on Baz. His back is to me (probably on purpose) (the tosser). I stare intently at him. After half an hour of practice, he's covered in grass stains. They're especially prominent on his clear pale skin. His jersey is green and purple, the Watford colours. The number 61 is emblazoned across the back with “Pitch” above it. His black hair is tied up in a stupid man bun. Makes sense. He’s always pushing it out of his face while looming over his books. If it gets in the way all the time, why doesn’t he just bloody well cut it? Wait no that’d be bad. It looks good when it’s falling in his face. No matter the impracticality.
They break from huddle. Baz turns around and his eyes catch mine. He glares, his deep-water grey gaze boring into me. I don’t know how he does it. One sharp look and my whole body is on fire. I hate it, that he can get under my skin like this so easily. I stick my tongue out at him. Childish, I know, but I think it’s effective. His brows shoot up, his eyes widen, and I swear his cheeks go a bit... pink. That’s weird. He embarrassed for me or something? Red with rage maybe? Before I can figure it out though, he turns and runs off to his position.
With one whistle blow, the team goes into action. Baz plays forward because of course he does. He needs to be the star of the show. And what makes it worse is that he’s really fucking good. It’d be so much better if he sucked. But no, he handles the football like a pro. Bouncing it between his feet like lightning, bending and weaving it easily around opposing players, and kicking with immeasurable force. (Of course he can kick it hard, he has a vampire strength).
Surprisingly Baz isn’t a ball hog. He works with everyone else, passing when needed. And it almost always reaches the other person. I don’t know how he does it, execute a perfect plan in seconds. I usually just fumble and bash until I get it right. Maybe the vampire senses help. Or maybe it’s just him, thinking ten steps ahead with that big brain of his. His stupid big brain. I wish he wasn’t so smart. Then it’d be easier to figure out what he’s plotting.
Someone passes the ball to him again, and Baz is off like a shot. He barrels down the field towards the goal like a fucking missile. No one can stop him. His face is all screwed up in concentration, lips in a determined scowl and eyebrows pushed down. The fire is his eyes burns so bright it’s almost blinding. With one furious kick, the football flies into the goal, too fast for the goalkeeper.
The other teammates cheer. And they should, it was good play. Part of me sorta wants to clap too. Wait, no, I can’t do that. Baz is my nemesis. I hate him! He’s evil! Just because he’s amazing at football doesn’t change that.
As he’s receiving his high fives, he turns to me. His expression is complicated. Lips all pinched, brow furrowed, but his eyes are sort of... soft. No anger or disgust like when he usually looks at me. But round and open with not a hint of typical negativity. I inhale sharply. My heart beats rapidly. Why the hell is he looking at me like that?! What’s he trying to do? Pretend to be nice so I’ll let my guard down? How stupid does he think I am? (Probably very.) Like hell if I’ll fall for that.
I take a page from the Baz Pitch playbook and sneer. The softness vanishes almost immediately, replaced with typical smug disgust. He turns away from me with a snort. Knew it was fake. Baz doesn’t do soft. He’s an evil plotting vampire. He just tried to trick me.
He could never be soft to me, that’s impossible.
AN: Simon you oblivious little shit with massive cognitive dissonance, I love you. First prompt done! :D Tomorrow: social media!
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elizabethcariasa · 4 years
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Failed Frozen Embryo Transfer #3 – Failed IVF
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As I type, the words are blurry from the tears. My heart is broken. And it’s in moments like these that hope seems impossible. The waves of grief, loss, and utter despair hit like a Mac truck. I am not ok. I feel like I am living the worst kind of ground hogs day since we just recently shared our last failed embryo transfer. On August 20th, I had my second frozen embryo transfer and 11 days later we found out that it failed. 
I never fully understood the pain of those trying for their second child. I always thought how the pain must have been 10x harder for those without having any children. But the chill reality for myself is having a sweet taste of motherhood and knowing that in every fiber of my body that is the role I was meant to have. And the utter heartbreak of knowing that joy and love and not being able to give it to more than one child. It’s something I have thought about a lot and something I now deeply understand. As I sit in this numb fog, the irony is that my butt is literally still numb from the progesterone injections and I still have permanent marker circles drawn on my butt cheeks from where I would have continued my shots if I had gotten pregnant. It all stings. Literally and figuratively.
Why I am deciding to share this so soon after our failed transfer is that I can’t just pretend things are normal because they aren’t. So much is going on in the world that I care so passionately about, but I have been secretly struggling through our fertility as the world simultaneously is hurting and the pressures of having a platform and showing up for others can feel daunting when your own life is consumed with its own fight. I just want to say, to always be kind to others because you NEVER know the struggles they are fighting in their lives. Especially in this Covid world where many people have lost their jobs, lost loved ones, and so many other pieces of life can be turned upside down. That being said, I try to carry on and move forward because it is what needs to happen in life. But now you know what has and is going on in the background.
I have preached so many times about hope, and strength and courage, and I don’t want this first piece of this story to throw you off. While I sit in a deep dark cave, even if I don’t see the light, I know it’s there. I have had that hope in the past and while it might be wavering now, I know it’s there. So let me explain what happened this cycle.
Frozen Embryo Prep
This being the 3rd time we prepped for Frozen Embryo Transfer in the last 5 months… you could say we were already running in the swing of things at the start of this one. This one also seemed to fly by. Each week, each new medication, the process just seemed faster likely because I was going through the motions, and getting things done and in such a rhythm from the past cycles. Everything went smoothly with medications for the most part. The only different thing this time was that the progesterone in oil shots (aka the butt shots) started to hurt way sooner this time around. I think because I still had scar tissue from the last round of FET, the discomfort from the injections started almost instantly. Insult to injury am I right?? Also the injection area became numb because of the nerves in the area so that was freaky and not fun at all either. And to be clear, the actual injections are not bad at all in my opinion. I guess that is also coming from someone that now has an intimate relationship with shots so don’t quote me on anything. It’s not the needle that hurts, the aftermath of the progesterone lumps in my butt that hurt and sting. I do the whole massage thing, have used heat, but none of it really helps. You just grit down and get through it. I just think of each shot getting me closer to the baby. For the most part though, it was a swift and smooth process to get ready for transfer day. I was at my last appointment getting ready, when I double checked to be sure that Blake could come with me this time. We had planned to have Otis spend the night at my sisters so that Blake could take me and it could be a more loving experience for me since last time we checked, partners were allowed to join for the procedure. Unfortunately, I got the news that because of the recent covid spike in Southern California, partners were no longer allowed to come for procedures. My heart sank. It’s so hard not to get frustrated in these moments because infertility in the time of covid makes you walk more alone than you would normally. But, protocol is protocol and it was not something to be obsessed and linger on. But it was part of my plan that was now shifted. But, like anything else, you need to just readjust and keep moving forward. That all being said, if you are going through infertility for your first time during covid-19 having to go to appointments alone, procedures alone, my heart just reaches out to yours because I know how scary it can be at first to navigate. Just know your army of women are here. And we are all marching into those appointments with courage.
Transfer Day
Blake and Otis drove me to my procedure on embryo transfer day. 30 minutes prior to my appointment per usual and I gave them both a kiss, popped my valium and headed upstairs. Before you go back to the room, you need to fill out a ton of paperwork verifying your info etc and as I was filling out my sheets, I came across someone else’s sheet mixed in with my forms. THANK GOD I had taken the valium already or I might have had a full blown meltdown. I went back to the front desk and I think the woman felt HORRIBLE for mixing up a paper. When I dropped my papers off to her I said, “ I don’t have to worry about getting my own embryo right?!” Kind of half joking… but also, dead serious. It is in moments like this you really just need to step back and think that nothing in life is perfect and mistakes happen and not to let it ruin the vibe of transfer day. I WAS ZEN and nothing was going to change that.
I then went to my procedure room and met with the embryologist who went through all my information and that instantly calmed my nerves. Then my doctor came in to review everything and we were ready to get the show on the road! They always take a photo of my embryo for me before we start which is so special. My little baby, sitting in its little embryo station. SCIENCE IS BEAUTIFUL. Even though last transfer I videoed Blake and it was chaotic, I decided to video him in again as just a bit of support. It did feel good to have him there somehow. He put himself on mute so he could hear (maybe?) what was going on. My doctor first takes a quick measurement of my lining to make sure everything is looking good and it was a little bit lower than expected. It was more like 7.6 or 7.8 overall which we normally aim for 8 but she said she saw a thicker portion in a certain spot she would aim for. Not something you love to hear before shoveling your embryo in… but not every cycle is the same and if the doctor was happy, I was happy. A few minutes later and our beautiful little embryo was happily inside my uterus. I laid down for 20-30 minutes after and listened to some of my favorite chill tunes until it was time to get up and go. This was it. And now that wait continued. 
2 Week Wait
During our two week wait, 2WW, we had A LOT going on. My transfer was on a Thursday and I was on bedrest from Thursday through all day Saturday. I called it my “momcation” lol. Blake took time off from work and was on Otis duty 24/7. I stayed in bed for everything except a potty run or getting my injections. I watched a ton of movies but the first one I always watch when I get home is Father of the Bride Part 2. LOVE THAT MOVIE and it always gives me those good feeling vibes. This time, I made sure to plan all our meals ahead of time so I was enjoying all my favorite things. I always cut all caffeine as recommended by my doctor so I sip my hot water with lemon with all my meals. I facetimed Otis for all my meals which made me feel like part of the family and so sweet to see his little face. I have some of the sweetest photos of him laughing and eating pasta with me on facetime. Every night Blake would bring him in after his bath to give me a kiss and try to have a little snuggle while Blake watched him to make sure he wouldn’t jump on me or anything. Hard with an active toddler but at night, he loves those milk and movie snuggles so glad I could get some mini snuggle time with him. Toward Saturday, being in bed starts to get boring even for a mom that REALLY needed some time to rest. By Sunday I was slowly getting back into the swing of things and suddenly in full party prep mode for Otis!
So Sunday I was off bedrest and his birthday was on Tuesday. Blake was able to take off work on Monday and Tuesday so he could help prepare for Otis’ birthday. This was so helpful and amazing because now, I couldn’t’ lift Otis at all, so he was able to really help out more so with him as I eased back into my normal routines. Even though party planning has its own stress involved, it was EPIC to have something to focus my attention on during the TTW. And even luckier that we also planned a drive by birthday for Otis’ friends to come on Saturday so we had a lot to work on and distract us during the week.
On the eve of my blood work, A peaceful calm fell over me. Maybe I was still smiling from celebrating Otis and his birthday. Maybe it was because I was scrolling through photos of him dancing but I just couldn’t help smiling. How lucky was I??? A mom of a 2 year old person that continues to bring me so much joy every day. This is the hope you hold out for. This is what every injection is meant for. This is why time after time you pick yourself up and get back up. And that day, my heart smiled. Knowing that I had that chance to find out I was pregnant the next day. This was going to be my chance where I got lucky to do this again. 
Bloodwork Day
I woke up feeling so good. Calm. Relaxed. It was shocking. My plan was to wake up, pee in a cup, and have Blake do a HPT (home pregnancy test) when I left the house for my blood work. My mindset here is that I never want to get a blind call from the doctor with negative news and I DON’T want to know before I have to go see people in a doctors office so always leave the pee and make Blake test it. My relationship with the “devil sticks” as I call it… well, it ain’t good so I am thankful that Blake takes on the HPT duty.
I headed to my doctor’s appointment and one of my favorite nurses was there to take my blood. We chatted, and honestly, I was feeling good. Feeling so confident in the weirdest of ways. I had had some light cramping the past days so I figured that was a positive sign. I headed quickly back to my car to test Blake to give me the results. 
He first text back and asked how blood work went before I quickly and boldly asked WHAT THE RESULTS WERE. “Negative.” He said. A pit sank in my stomach, and the tears started to stream as I sat in the parking lot. Flashbacks to our last failed transfer and negative HPT. It had failed… AGAIN. At this point it was 8:45 and I needed to head home right away to get back on Mom duty to watch Otis since Blake had to go to work. I had to try to dry my tears up so I could drive home safely. I did my best to focus and get myself home. The waves of grief continually tug at my heart. EVERY. DAMN. SECOND. I walked inside and Otis smiled at me screaming “MAMA!!!” as he always does when I enter a room. I had to smile. But it almost made my heart break twice knowing I didn’t make him a baby sibling. 
I cried most of the day. On and off. Without warning. But what I talked about before is mourning this loss as a mother is so difficult. I didn’t want to be hysterically crying in front of Otis all day. He needs a mother that is happy and making him smile. But it’s not easy. Blake came out at lunch and I lost it. Trying to cover my face in front of Otis so he couldn’t’ see my tears. The frustration of just having to FIGHT and STRUGGLE for so long, all of it just feels so unfair. I sobbed as I told him I just wish it was easy like everyone else. It was just so hard. 
Today, I am still not ok. And to be honest I won’t be ok for a while. I know this isn’t the story you want to be reading and trust me when I say it’s not the story I thought I would be typing. But it’s the cruel reality of infertility that there are no guarantees. What makes this failure even more devastating is that we only have 1 more embryo left. So talk about pressure and your whole freaking family life flashing before your eyes. Your heart on the chopping block. Every time I think about it breaks me into pieces. I have been in that situation before, and sadly, we did not have a happy ending. Everything about this process will give you PTSD or at least it did for me. When you talk about being hopeful, it’s likely one of the hardest things you can achieve while going through treatment. But in the end, hope is what we all have. Faith that we can put our best hopeful heart forward and do everything in our power to put one foot in front of the other. I don’t know what our future holds right now, but I know I will have the courage to move forward. My mission in writing these blog posts about our infertility journey is shed some light on the realities of fertility treatment. It’s important to know the good, the bad and the ugly and to know that though times can be very dark, the rewards can be life’s sweetest. 
Blake turned to me yesterday and said, “WOW. Can you believe just how special a miracle that Otis is???” And he is so right. Bless our little rainbow baby for bringing so much love and light into our life especially in these current hard times.
To my friends out there struggling, I wish I could wrap my arms around you. So many parts of this process are now done alone because of this Covid world but know you are not walking alone. We all walk together. You are not alone.
I wrote a few posts on infertility and IVF and you can find them below:
IVF 1 
IVF 2 
IVF 3
Prepping for FET (frozen embryo transfer)
Preparing for IVF egg retrieval 
How to support a friend going through IVF
IVF book resources
Covid-19 Cancelled My Embryo Transfer
Failed IVF Frozen Embryo Transfer
The post Failed Frozen Embryo Transfer #3 – Failed IVF appeared first on eat.sleep.wear. - Fashion & Lifestyle Blog by Kimberly Lapides.
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kurtwarren54 · 4 years
Text
Failed Frozen Embryo Transfer #3 – Failed IVF
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As I type, the words are blurry from the tears. My heart is broken. And it’s in moments like these that hope seems impossible. The waves of grief, loss, and utter despair hit like a Mac truck. I am not ok. I feel like I am living the worst kind of ground hogs day since we just recently shared our last failed embryo transfer. On August 20th, I had my second frozen embryo transfer and 11 days later we found out that it failed. 
I never fully understood the pain of those trying for their second child. I always thought how the pain must have been 10x harder for those without having any children. But the chill reality for myself is having a sweet taste of motherhood and knowing that in every fiber of my body that is the role I was meant to have. And the utter heartbreak of knowing that joy and love and not being able to give it to more than one child. It’s something I have thought about a lot and something I now deeply understand. As I sit in this numb fog, the irony is that my butt is literally still numb from the progesterone injections and I still have permanent marker circles drawn on my butt cheeks from where I would have continued my shots if I had gotten pregnant. It all stings. Literally and figuratively.
Why I am deciding to share this so soon after our failed transfer is that I can’t just pretend things are normal because they aren’t. So much is going on in the world that I care so passionately about, but I have been secretly struggling through our fertility as the world simultaneously is hurting and the pressures of having a platform and showing up for others can feel daunting when your own life is consumed with its own fight. I just want to say, to always be kind to others because you NEVER know the struggles they are fighting in their lives. Especially in this Covid world where many people have lost their jobs, lost loved ones, and so many other pieces of life can be turned upside down. That being said, I try to carry on and move forward because it is what needs to happen in life. But now you know what has and is going on in the background.
I have preached so many times about hope, and strength and courage, and I don’t want this first piece of this story to throw you off. While I sit in a deep dark cave, even if I don’t see the light, I know it’s there. I have had that hope in the past and while it might be wavering now, I know it’s there. So let me explain what happened this cycle.
Frozen Embryo Prep
This being the 3rd time we prepped for Frozen Embryo Transfer in the last 5 months… you could say we were already running in the swing of things at the start of this one. This one also seemed to fly by. Each week, each new medication, the process just seemed faster likely because I was going through the motions, and getting things done and in such a rhythm from the past cycles. Everything went smoothly with medications for the most part. The only different thing this time was that the progesterone in oil shots (aka the butt shots) started to hurt way sooner this time around. I think because I still had scar tissue from the last round of FET, the discomfort from the injections started almost instantly. Insult to injury am I right?? Also the injection area became numb because of the nerves in the area so that was freaky and not fun at all either. And to be clear, the actual injections are not bad at all in my opinion. I guess that is also coming from someone that now has an intimate relationship with shots so don’t quote me on anything. It’s not the needle that hurts, the aftermath of the progesterone lumps in my butt that hurt and sting. I do the whole massage thing, have used heat, but none of it really helps. You just grit down and get through it. I just think of each shot getting me closer to the baby. For the most part though, it was a swift and smooth process to get ready for transfer day. I was at my last appointment getting ready, when I double checked to be sure that Blake could come with me this time. We had planned to have Otis spend the night at my sisters so that Blake could take me and it could be a more loving experience for me since last time we checked, partners were allowed to join for the procedure. Unfortunately, I got the news that because of the recent covid spike in Southern California, partners were no longer allowed to come for procedures. My heart sank. It’s so hard not to get frustrated in these moments because infertility in the time of covid makes you walk more alone than you would normally. But, protocol is protocol and it was not something to be obsessed and linger on. But it was part of my plan that was now shifted. But, like anything else, you need to just readjust and keep moving forward. That all being said, if you are going through infertility for your first time during covid-19 having to go to appointments alone, procedures alone, my heart just reaches out to yours because I know how scary it can be at first to navigate. Just know your army of women are here. And we are all marching into those appointments with courage.
Transfer Day
Blake and Otis drove me to my procedure on embryo transfer day. 30 minutes prior to my appointment per usual and I gave them both a kiss, popped my valium and headed upstairs. Before you go back to the room, you need to fill out a ton of paperwork verifying your info etc and as I was filling out my sheets, I came across someone else’s sheet mixed in with my forms. THANK GOD I had taken the valium already or I might have had a full blown meltdown. I went back to the front desk and I think the woman felt HORRIBLE for mixing up a paper. When I dropped my papers off to her I said, “ I don’t have to worry about getting my own embryo right?!” Kind of half joking… but also, dead serious. It is in moments like this you really just need to step back and think that nothing in life is perfect and mistakes happen and not to let it ruin the vibe of transfer day. I WAS ZEN and nothing was going to change that.
I then went to my procedure room and met with the embryologist who went through all my information and that instantly calmed my nerves. Then my doctor came in to review everything and we were ready to get the show on the road! They always take a photo of my embryo for me before we start which is so special. My little baby, sitting in its little embryo station. SCIENCE IS BEAUTIFUL. Even though last transfer I videoed Blake and it was chaotic, I decided to video him in again as just a bit of support. It did feel good to have him there somehow. He put himself on mute so he could hear (maybe?) what was going on. My doctor first takes a quick measurement of my lining to make sure everything is looking good and it was a little bit lower than expected. It was more like 7.6 or 7.8 overall which we normally aim for 8 but she said she saw a thicker portion in a certain spot she would aim for. Not something you love to hear before shoveling your embryo in… but not every cycle is the same and if the doctor was happy, I was happy. A few minutes later and our beautiful little embryo was happily inside my uterus. I laid down for 20-30 minutes after and listened to some of my favorite chill tunes until it was time to get up and go. This was it. And now that wait continued. 
2 Week Wait
During our two week wait, 2WW, we had A LOT going on. My transfer was on a Thursday and I was on bedrest from Thursday through all day Saturday. I called it my “momcation” lol. Blake took time off from work and was on Otis duty 24/7. I stayed in bed for everything except a potty run or getting my injections. I watched a ton of movies but the first one I always watch when I get home is Father of the Bride Part 2. LOVE THAT MOVIE and it always gives me those good feeling vibes. This time, I made sure to plan all our meals ahead of time so I was enjoying all my favorite things. I always cut all caffeine as recommended by my doctor so I sip my hot water with lemon with all my meals. I facetimed Otis for all my meals which made me feel like part of the family and so sweet to see his little face. I have some of the sweetest photos of him laughing and eating pasta with me on facetime. Every night Blake would bring him in after his bath to give me a kiss and try to have a little snuggle while Blake watched him to make sure he wouldn’t jump on me or anything. Hard with an active toddler but at night, he loves those milk and movie snuggles so glad I could get some mini snuggle time with him. Toward Saturday, being in bed starts to get boring even for a mom that REALLY needed some time to rest. By Sunday I was slowly getting back into the swing of things and suddenly in full party prep mode for Otis!
So Sunday I was off bedrest and his birthday was on Tuesday. Blake was able to take off work on Monday and Tuesday so he could help prepare for Otis’ birthday. This was so helpful and amazing because now, I couldn’t’ lift Otis at all, so he was able to really help out more so with him as I eased back into my normal routines. Even though party planning has its own stress involved, it was EPIC to have something to focus my attention on during the TTW. And even luckier that we also planned a drive by birthday for Otis’ friends to come on Saturday so we had a lot to work on and distract us during the week.
On the eve of my blood work, A peaceful calm fell over me. Maybe I was still smiling from celebrating Otis and his birthday. Maybe it was because I was scrolling through photos of him dancing but I just couldn’t help smiling. How lucky was I??? A mom of a 2 year old person that continues to bring me so much joy every day. This is the hope you hold out for. This is what every injection is meant for. This is why time after time you pick yourself up and get back up. And that day, my heart smiled. Knowing that I had that chance to find out I was pregnant the next day. This was going to be my chance where I got lucky to do this again. 
Bloodwork Day
I woke up feeling so good. Calm. Relaxed. It was shocking. My plan was to wake up, pee in a cup, and have Blake do a HPT (home pregnancy test) when I left the house for my blood work. My mindset here is that I never want to get a blind call from the doctor with negative news and I DON’T want to know before I have to go see people in a doctors office so always leave the pee and make Blake test it. My relationship with the “devil sticks” as I call it… well, it ain’t good so I am thankful that Blake takes on the HPT duty.
I headed to my doctor’s appointment and one of my favorite nurses was there to take my blood. We chatted, and honestly, I was feeling good. Feeling so confident in the weirdest of ways. I had had some light cramping the past days so I figured that was a positive sign. I headed quickly back to my car to test Blake to give me the results. 
He first text back and asked how blood work went before I quickly and boldly asked WHAT THE RESULTS WERE. “Negative.” He said. A pit sank in my stomach, and the tears started to stream as I sat in the parking lot. Flashbacks to our last failed transfer and negative HPT. It had failed… AGAIN. At this point it was 8:45 and I needed to head home right away to get back on Mom duty to watch Otis since Blake had to go to work. I had to try to dry my tears up so I could drive home safely. I did my best to focus and get myself home. The waves of grief continually tug at my heart. EVERY. DAMN. SECOND. I walked inside and Otis smiled at me screaming “MAMA!!!” as he always does when I enter a room. I had to smile. But it almost made my heart break twice knowing I didn’t make him a baby sibling. 
I cried most of the day. On and off. Without warning. But what I talked about before is mourning this loss as a mother is so difficult. I didn’t want to be hysterically crying in front of Otis all day. He needs a mother that is happy and making him smile. But it’s not easy. Blake came out at lunch and I lost it. Trying to cover my face in front of Otis so he couldn’t’ see my tears. The frustration of just having to FIGHT and STRUGGLE for so long, all of it just feels so unfair. I sobbed as I told him I just wish it was easy like everyone else. It was just so hard. 
Today, I am still not ok. And to be honest I won’t be ok for a while. I know this isn’t the story you want to be reading and trust me when I say it’s not the story I thought I would be typing. But it’s the cruel reality of infertility that there are no guarantees. What makes this failure even more devastating is that we only have 1 more embryo left. So talk about pressure and your whole freaking family life flashing before your eyes. Your heart on the chopping block. Every time I think about it breaks me into pieces. I have been in that situation before, and sadly, we did not have a happy ending. Everything about this process will give you PTSD or at least it did for me. When you talk about being hopeful, it’s likely one of the hardest things you can achieve while going through treatment. But in the end, hope is what we all have. Faith that we can put our best hopeful heart forward and do everything in our power to put one foot in front of the other. I don’t know what our future holds right now, but I know I will have the courage to move forward. My mission in writing these blog posts about our infertility journey is shed some light on the realities of fertility treatment. It’s important to know the good, the bad and the ugly and to know that though times can be very dark, the rewards can be life’s sweetest. 
Blake turned to me yesterday and said, “WOW. Can you believe just how special a miracle that Otis is???” And he is so right. Bless our little rainbow baby for bringing so much love and light into our life especially in these current hard times.
To my friends out there struggling, I wish I could wrap my arms around you. So many parts of this process are now done alone because of this Covid world but know you are not walking alone. We all walk together. You are not alone.
I wrote a few posts on infertility and IVF and you can find them below:
IVF 1 
IVF 2 
IVF 3
Prepping for FET (frozen embryo transfer)
Preparing for IVF egg retrieval 
How to support a friend going through IVF
IVF book resources
Covid-19 Cancelled My Embryo Transfer
Failed IVF Frozen Embryo Transfer
The post Failed Frozen Embryo Transfer #3 – Failed IVF appeared first on eat.sleep.wear. - Fashion & Lifestyle Blog by Kimberly Lapides.
from Wellness https://www.eatsleepwear.com/2020/09/01/failed-frozen-embryo-transfer-3-failed-ivf/ via http://www.rssmix.com/
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vmheadquarters · 7 years
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ASK THE FANDOM--RESPONSES
Here’s this week’s Ask the Fandom question:
What would you be the MOST worried/afraid of seeing in a future Veronica Mars mini-series? (Exs: can include artificial LoVe triangles, mishandled rape humors, and problematic portrayals of feminism). To put another way, is there anything Rob, et al. could do in a future mini-series that would ruin the show for you? (give your detailed examples below).
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And here’s what a bunch of you had to say (seriously, this was a pretty popular ATF, although of course not in league with ‘What Hogwarts House does your fave belong to?’ and ‘Is Logan Echolls well-endowed?’)
@chelseaellie-- Where do I start, it’s such a well written show being disappointed is the start
I am worried they will break LoVe up to create fake drama. They don’t need that just need to have normal relationship problems, like wanting a family and getting married
I’m worried about not enough Logan as if he’s with the navy how can we have him around, or him being calmed too much and not as snarky as normal
I worry about too much focus on dick, who I can’t stand he’s a creators pet (along with Piz) he’s annoying and should have grown up, but they love him too much
I worry about fan service and bringing in characters cos they think fans want them and ruining the story
I worry it will mean the end of my beloved izombie
@almecria-- As long as they don't break LoVe apart AGAIN for the sake of fake drama (and as long as we're done with useless annoying artificial LoVe triangles), I'm cool with almost anything to be honest.
@elliebear75-- Do *not* kill Logan. I repeat…DO NOT KILL LOGAN.
No “heroic death while serving his country.”
No “sacrificing himself to save Veronica.”
No “some crazed Aaron Echolls superfan murder.”
None of it.
Not to develop Veronica’s character.
Not to bring drama to the franchise.
Not to springboard an entirely different direction to the storyline.
Give us the beauty of day-to-day drama that is two people navigating a life together. Give us fun and snark and sadness. Give us lots and lots of LoVe.
Just don’t kill Logan.
@lisawolfe80—That was my first thought too!! J
@elliebear75-- @lisawolfe80 Right?!!
@chelseaellie--@elliebear75 surely they wouldn’t even consider killing him off, that would be crazy, now I’m worried
@elliebear75--@chelseaellie Unfortunately, RT has said on several occasions that his original idea for the movie was much darker and that even the rebooted season 4 would have only had Veronica in it. So anything is possible. But just in case Rob Thomas is trolling Tumblr, it needs to be out in the universe....NO KILLING LOGAN.
@chelseaellie-- @elliebear75 really only Veronica in S4? Was that the networks plan? The great thing about Veronica Mars is the relationships and how they all work. He can’t kill Logan don’t even think about it Rob Thomas, to be honest if he can’t kill if Blaine who is pure evil he can’t do anything to his more popular character
@elliebear75-- @chelseaellie If you go on YouTube you can find the 15 minute "demo" of what RT envisioned for season 4 (V as a rookie FBI agent) and none of the other characters are even remotely in the picture. As for RT and iZombie, I feel that it is his partner, Diane, who keeps Blaine alive, not RT. In interviews, she seems to be the one with the soft spot for Blaine/David Anders.
@jesso80-- Amen! I just want LoVe with normal problems and solving crimes
@teenagegumshoe-- Making it the Logan/Veronica show. I get that it’s a popular pairing, and that Rob himself loves it, but I’d hate to see the show center on Veronica’s relationship with Logan. Let him be a secondary character but it is first and foremost her story. 
@cheshirecatstrut-- I’d most fear a retread of original material, instead of letting the characters be thirty.
Let Logan and V navigate a normal, committed adult relationship instead of love triangles and Manufactured Big Misunderstandings, and let the day-to-day of that happen on screen. Let Veronica’s friends come out from under her shadow and show how they’ve developed their own talents and lives apart from her. Let the supporting players have relationships and problems that don’t directly relate back to the main character, yet still merit story time.
Let all the characters interact, instead of being compartmentalized as Veronica’s Hacker Friend, Veronica’s Hot Boyfriend, Veronica’s Emotional Support, Veronica’s Guide to the World of Crime, etc. This show had an amazing lead, but it also had a killer ensemble cast, and one of it’s great strengths was the way any two actors could be put in a scene together and manage to shine. I want to see Logan and Keith interact, or Weevil and Wallace, or Mac and Van Clemmons, or Vinnie and Cliff. 
And don’t make the overarching season-long plot so convoluted the audience has trouble keeping track. Also, don’t over-focus on the episode mysteries to the detriment of the overarching plot. Most fans tune in for the big, long-term story, so that’s the one that needs to be best-crafted.
 Also, please please please please…no more Nice Guys hogging screen time. PLEASE.
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long-live-jessejane · 7 years
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10 Things to Hate About the iPhone
Of September i took delivery of my iPhone in the beginning, the start of a trying month personally that found me from the workplace for lengthy periods and only touching the globe via my telephone. It had been a baptism of fire for me and these devices. You shall have observed the adverts, used it in phone shops, viewed fellow commuters' shoulders, borrowed your friend's ... great isn't it? Or could it be? In this post I contact on some of the things about the device which have really irked me personally. A bit or quite a lot just. Also to keep up with the celestial karmic stability I've a companion content on a few of the reasons for having the iPhone that I definitely love. There's enough materials for both articles, I assure you! So right here we go, backwards order, the 10 factors that you should hate about the iPhone! 10. Grubby fingertips and the onscreen keyboard The iPhone's onscreen keyboard is surprisingly effective and doesn't take long to get accustomed to. Be sure you wash the hands just before you do therefore just, however! This is not just aesthetic: For reasons uknown I have the ability to keep a sticky tag under my right thumb that attract dirt, biscuit crumbs, or whatever, correct over the erase essential. Generally the crumb lands there just as I finish the two 2 web page email and begins to rub out the whole message character by personality! This is simply not an exaggeration!! It really is, however, not really a daily occurrence!! 9. External memory We went the complete hog and took the 16GB iPhone instantly. I don't regret it! I haven't been selective with my music collection and have pretty much all my ripped CDs stored on the iPhone. That's 14GB. Which leaves valuable little room for true data. On other devices that is rarely a problem and nonvolatile storage is usually flash memory of some description, how big is which obeys Moore's law and doubles in proportions and speed every 9 months or so and halves in physical size every 24 months roughly with a new "mini" or "micro" format. I have yet to perform out of space on a cellular smartphone or mobile phone, with an address book of over 500 names even. The problem on the iPhone is that there surely is no external memory slot no way (short of wielding a soldering iron) of expanding the inner memory. A shame. The ipod itouch has spawned a 32GB edition and I suppose the 32GB iPhone is coming. When that occurs the legacy user base will be left wondering how to proceed next. 8. Electric battery and battery life The iPhone is sleek - a centimetre thick and enticingly smooth with those rounded edges barely. There are few buttons, no little doorways to arrive open and break off in your pocket and no memory slots to fill with fluff and dirt. One of the known reasons for the smooth style is that the iPhone doesn't have a consumer removeable battery. The battery could be changed by an ongoing service centre, and over both years I'll keep this product I have a much to improve the battery at least once, but I cannot perform it myself. Also the battery can be surprisingly little - it needs to be to fit into this neat small package. The purchase price you purchase this is battery life. My gadget is currently 6 weeks outdated and also have been completely cycled about 5 times (I tend to keep the electric battery on charge but let it run flat at least one time weekly). EASILY is not continuously using these devices, checking the device twice one hour and answering phone calls just, using 3G and Press, I could rely on a full morning of 10 to 12 hours between charges. If I start WiFi this drops to 6 or 7 hours. If the GPS is utilized by me without WiFi, autonomy drops to four or five 5 hours. EASILY wanted to be frugal and last a complete a day really, I would have to switch off both Force 3G and email, and reduce screen brightness to the very least. For some social people this is a major issue. For me personally, since I either possess a PC on and can trail an USB cable, or spend your day driving with the iPhone installed as an ipod device and being billed by the automobile, it is much less of a constraint. Nonetheless it continues to be an annoyance. I haven't however noticed an iPhone equivalent of the Dell Latitude "Slice" - an electric battery "backpack" for the iPhone that could a lot more than double autonomy with reduced extra thickness, but I suppose that someone, someplace, is focusing on an aftermarket gadget. 7. Document management There is absolutely no exact carbon copy of the Windows Mobile File Manager or Mac Finder on the iPhone so there is absolutely no way of manipulating file objects on device. Admittedly the iPhone does a credible job of shielding you from the need to do any kind of file level manipulation: Including the Camera includes a photo album that is also available in other applications that require to gain access to images (for instance, the iBlogger application I take advantage of to create short articles on this website). But there are instances if you want to control individual file items still. One is during set up and set up when setting up root certificates for SSL to ensure that these devices can speak to an Exchange server: If you don't use Apple's enterprise deployment device (which locks straight down the device and prevents further configuration changes, thus not necessarily desirable), the only methods to set up these devices for Exchange are to create a short-term IMAP accounts and download an attachment that you open up, or to setup a website with the main certificate and define the correct MIME types on the web server (I possibly could not understand this to work, incidentally!). Just how much easier it could be to download the certificate onto the device using Home windows explorer (linking to a Personal computer vian USB exposes the devices memory as an attached storage space device) and also to have the ability to open the certificate document from memory space on the iPhone. The other key dependence on this functionality is when manipulating attachments on email messages. There is no real method of saving attachments, or attaching documents to a fresh or forwarded message selectively. 6. Navigating through email folders I have a tendency to preserve a complete large amount of emails in my own mailbox. I archive once a full year, and towards the finish of the next year usually. I'm also pretty busy and focus on twelve consulting and business advancement projects at the same time. That means a couple of things: a whole lot of email messages, and the necessity to sensibly organise those emails. I organise my email messages into trees - consulting projects in separate folders and these folders organised by client, all kept individual from businesses I'm committed to and from my own stuff. 40 or 50 folders probably. On Windows Cellular devices I can cleanly organise this quite, having the ability to expand or collapse parts of the folder tree. The tree is normally recognised by the iPhone, but provides me no method of collapsing the hierarchy. The Inbox is always at the very top: Junk email is usually always in the bottom. Moving junked emails means traversing the whole tree incorrectly, which is a discomfort using the classy flick scroll gesture also. It's clumbsy and unnecessary. 5. Filtering offline email content The other side of this complexity is managing just how much of my "online archive" to take with me. You don't have (no space) to take it all with me: I am quite used to putting sensible limits on the portion of the mail folder to take with me. Windows Cell enables me to consider 1, two or three 3 months worth of email with me, to state whether I take attachments with me, all the email or the headers just. I could select which folders to take or leave behind even. And I won't need to worry easily go away and discover I am lacking an essential folder - I can change the parameters and these devices will download what's missing. The iPhone is less flexible slightly. It won't i want to download accessories pre-emptively: It'll just load the message header and keep the attachment behind unless and until I select the email manually. I could define just how many days of email messages i from one day to 1 one month download, but beyond that I cannot specify a limit. I've a filtration system on the amount of messages within a folder that I screen from 25 to 200 messages however the interaction between this environment and the time limit isn't entirely clear. In case you are a light consumer that is less of a concern: For a heavier email user with a complicated folder hieracrchy you have much less control and may come across memory management problems as a result. 4. Message Exchange and management The worst problem with message management on the iPhone is specific to Microsoft Exchange actually. I am a specialist user and like Microsoft Exchange really. It isn't simply my mail server: It's a complete collaboration engine, with group and resource scheduling, rich address book, "to accomplish" lists, journaling, contact histories etc. I don't utilize it for fax and tone of voice mail yet, but that's just a question of failing to have made enough time to get the interface box to the PBX and convert that feature on. THEREFORE I is up there with the additional 60% of business mailbox users that are addicted to Exchange. When the iPhone appeared the Exchange conversation tale was weak 1st. It could do IMAP, but that's only a fraction of the tale. No nagging issue, that wasn't Apple's intended principal audience either, but the enterprise users wanted the iPhone, so Apple surely got to work. To be good to them, Apple have done a complete lot with iPhone 3G to enhance the Exchange story. The majority of the protection protocols is there, including crucial features like remote control SSL and clean, and it facilitates Push. Business deployment is easy as well with a devoted enterprise set up tool that supports remote device construction. Unfortunately Apple appear to have stopped halfway through the API and a complete lot of Exchange functionality is overlooked. A few of this, like losing some data richness within get in touch with and calendar products, doesn't have an effect on all users equally. Other components are more essential, however. The ultimate way to explain this is one way you forward electronic mails with attachments. The Exchange API permits customers to forward the message without the message content being kept locally: You can ahead the header and the server will connect the attachments and other wealthy content material before forwarding. The iPhone doesn't understand why: First it has to download all the message and accessories from the server to the iPhone, then it must add the forwarding address and send out the whole message back to the server. Shifting a note between folders is the consists of and same the same telecommunications overhead. A nuisance for me personally, but only that: If you aren't on a data bundle and pay out by the MB you then have to be cautious with this. [Another side-effect of the issue is certainly that server-side disclaimers and signatures get positioned by the end of the forwarded message, than under new message text rather.] 3. Reading HTML and rich texts I really like HTML emails. I understand that is considered a cardinal sin in a few quarters, but as somebody once stated, if email have been invented after http would email have been performed any other method? HTML is definitely ubiquitous, it really is clean and it functions. Not to mention being the very best mobile internet device available, the iPhone should be an excellent HTML email reader, shouldn't it? Well, it very is nearly. It can some stuff well really. The design is got because of it, it renders inline images, it'll even show some history. But what if the text is wide really? It'll wrap won't it? No, it will not. It'll shrink the written text to match. It'll make the text really, small really. And you can't cheat by rotating the device, making the display "wider" and the font larger, because the mail customer doesn't support scenery presentation (why?). Of course you can zoom in, because it's HTML, nevertheless, you need to scan the complete line then, whizzing over the page to the ultimate end of the line, then whizzing back again to get the beginning of another line again. Oh dear! 2. Task switching The iPhone is a pleasant, clean style. And area of the cool, clean look originates from the lack of nasty brief cut action control keys. The iPhone has only three buttons on the edges of these devices: the on/off button at the top, the volume up/down toggle on the relative side and the excellent single button mute button above the quantity toggle. That's it. The only other button on these devices may be the "home" switch on leading, below the display screen. The house button stops whatever application you are engaged on and goes to the house page of the device - the pretty page filled with icons that set up each application on these devices. Good work it's pretty, because you find a lot of it. There is absolutely no way to jump to your calendar directly, or address book, or email. In addition to the one "dual click" action (consumer configurable to either go for phone favourites or iPod controls), the only method to start an activity is to return to the home page or more again into the application you want. Discover a fascinating URL within an email that you want to check out in Safari? Memorise it well, or write it down, because unless the written text has been developed as a web link you need to get back to the house page, begin Safari, type the URL, realise you have it wrong, press the real home button again, start email, open up the email, find the URL ... and begin again. Or you could just choose the URL and trim and paste it in to the browser address bar ... except ... 1. How on the planet do you cut and paste? Once Xerox had invented the mouse, the GUI and WYSIWYG editing, it had been up to Apple to take that technology and make it affordable with the Lisa and the Mac. And Microsoft to create it ubiquitous, of program. Among the joys of using the mouse, or any pointing device, is that you will be distributed by it a third dimension as you maneuver around the page. You are not constrained by the line or the term or the paragraph - you can leap right to any portion of the record. And you could select elements of a record by dragging over an expressed term, a relative collection, a paragraph, and take action with it. Like reducing it out. Or copying it. Or dragging it. It's regular. That's precisely what you perform. You do not have 3 hour seminars and classes on utilizing a mouse (or a stylus) to point and choose, drag and click. You demonstrate it once, the training student understands and will it. However the company that helped the mouse get away from the lab and enter the shops appears to have forgotten about it. Obtain out your iPhone. Write a sentence. Write a different one. Oops - that second sentence would make even more sense Prior to the initial one. I'll simply slice and paste the sentence. Oh no you will not! Since there is zero paste and lower on the iPhone. Listen to that? No? Well, I'll state it once again! THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO Trim AND PASTE ON THE IPHONE. Google around a little and you will find a large number of articles about them. You'll find shock, indignation, horror. You'll actually discover brave Apple gurus explaining sagely that you don't want trim and paste since the iPhone offers you more immediate means of using information, like linking URLS, or detecting telephone numbers, or, er, something. The probably explanation is that once Apple has made a decision to get rid of the stylus, the only UI gesture was to use two fingers and drag that over the page to choose some text. But that gesture acquired already been used with the wonderful pinch zoom motion applied to large files and webpages. There exists a real way to avoid it, however. Some extremely credible proof idea demonstrations have already been place on the internet showing what sort of sustained stage and drag with single finger (just like the stylus selection action in Windows Mobile) will be workable rather than conflict with any various other screen actions on the iPhone. Let's wish that the idea demos function and we see cut and paste applied in an forthcoming firmware release. For the time being, at least every day I wager every iPhone user will silently curse twice, shrug and present up composing that urgent memo because they cannot become bothered to type everything again. So that's it. Do not misunderstand me, The iPhone can be believed by me is an excellent, transformational and iconic device. Much like the Mac pc, it has transformed our perception of just what a cellular device ought to be. Mobile phone smartphones and cell phones will never end up being the same again. It's that for all it's brilliance, it remains flawed. The iPhone may be the product of an excellent and prolific yet highly introspective band of engineers. Left absolve to innovate, unrestrained by any notion of practicality or truth or what the user currently thinks she or he wants, Apple have made a concept gadget. I'm grateful they possess, but I dread that it'll be to others up, with a clearer grasp of what an individual can use, specifically what ELSE an individual does, to consider the iPhone to another step.
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black-dragon1998 · 5 years
Text
Waiting for supergirl
Kara doesn't come home, being held up with superhero duties. witch leaves Lena to prepare Lydia for bed alone.
part 4 of Out of the box way of starting a family. other parts here part 1 - part 2 - part3
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Lena was walking through the apartment, Lydia playing in front of the TV on her playpen. On the TV was playing some child show with lots of colours to keeps the kids’ attention. Lena in the was waiting for Kara to come home.
Normally Lydia should be getting ready for bed, but Lena and Kara had a ritual for Lydia’s bedtime, and it hadn’t been broken since they started it.
Lena was a little bit conflicted about what she should do. She knew Kara was probably saving the city as Supergirl, still, she worried because she hadn’t heard from her since they shared lunch. Lena still hadn’t gone back to work, not being able to leave Lydia just jet.
Sam took over the duties at L-Corp as best she could, and Lena did the necessary paperwork from home.
“Mommy?” Lena’s attention was drawn away from her own thoughts when her daughter called. Looking up she saw Lydia running toward her, her little arms flailing to make sure her mother got her attention.
in the last week, Lydia was starting to do much better. She started to talk and play more instead of staying in her mother’s arms. She also started to trust people more, she actually started asking for her ants and Ruby.
When Lydia reached her she looked up at her with a huge smile.
“yes, a chroi?” Lena smiled back at her daughter.
“play with me?” Lydia asked pulling at her mother’s pants to make her move in the direction of the playpen.
Deciding to put away her worries for the moment and follow Lydia to her toys. To Lena’s great delight Lydia preferred to build with blocks instead of playing with dolls. Kara said it was the Luthor genes in her that made her want to build stuff. ‘just like her mommy’ Kara had teased her, and Lena could only blush and smile.
“What are we making, Angeal?” Lydia was delighted her ‘mommy’ was giving her, her full focus. Especially since her other mother wasn’t there for attention hogging. Kara usually was the one to play with Lydia. So, the little girl was going to make the best of it.
“Wobot.” Lydia clapped her hands while almost jumping up and down, Lena chuckled and pulled the little girl on her lap. A robot was something she could do.
  To Lena’s own surprise she was enjoying herself and Lydia was delighted to lay with her mommy.
“Mommy look! Wobot.” Lena smiled lovingly as she saw her daughter fawn over the little block robot. She should probably make her a real robot when she was a little bit older.
“it’s lovely dear. Maybe I should take you with me to L-Corp next time. The men there could learn from you.” Lena laughed while hugging her daughter close. Lydia, in turn, hugged her mother back and couldn’t stop her giggles.
Lena lifter Lydia up so she could look her in the eyes.
“What do you say about dinner after all that building.” Lydia had gone serious as she looked back into Lena’s eyes. Proving to Lena she was positively Kara’s kid; only then could food be taken so seriously. The Luthor eyebrow raise was a rare contradiction to that.
“Mack and cheese?” Lydia was like a perfect blend between her and Kara, making the pout fired at her all the more effective.
“Alright, but only if you eat some fruits with them.” Lucky for Lena, unlike Kara Lydia likes to eat fruits and vegetables.
 While the home-made Mac and cheese warmed up in the oven, Lena sliced an apple and placed it in front of her daughter. The food was devoured that is she didn’t live with an adult Kryptonian she would look up, but now it was just another thing she was used to.
Lena put their plates in the dishwasher while Lydia stayed in her high chair.
it was starting to become really late and Lydia had refused to take a nap this afternoon. This caused her to rub her eyes with a tiny fist but still being too stubborn to admit she is sleepy.
“A chroi, want to take a nap with me while we wait for mama?” Lena tried, Lydia was starting to get grumpy, making her whine and hold her hands out for Lena. Still not admitting she was tired. ‘them Luthor stubbornness.’ If Kara asked later, she so would say it wasn’t.
“Mama?” Lydia’s had her brows knitted together when her attention was brought back on the missing parent. Not wanting to a crying fit with would only leave ger grumpier.
“Mama will be here when you wake up.” Lena tried. Lydia vigorously shook her head. Lena seeing the tears welling up she acted fast. Sometimes you had to give in as a parent.
“not even if we sleep in the big bed.” Normally Lena would refrain from letting Lydia sleep in between her and Kara. Keeping it as a last resort, like now.
“Mama!” Lydia started to shout to getter with the first tears. Rubbing her temple’s, she went for another approach.
“How about this. Why don’t we watch ‘The Lion King’ while we wait for mama to get home?” Lena was gasping at her last straws with this. She already picked Lydia out off her high chair, rubbing her back soothingly. Hoping the little one would fall asleep while watching the movie.
“Cuddles?” Lydia asked shyly.
“How could I say no to my favourite cuddle buddy.” Lena smiled. Both were giggling the whole way to the bedroom. Having thrown  routine out of the window, Lena laid Lydia in the middle of the bed. putting a few pillows around her, preventing her from fall of the bed.
“Okay baby, look at me.” Lena tried to get her daughters full attention, who was distracted by the pillows around her. When two big blue eyes looked at her and smiled Lena continued.
“LION KING!” Lydia clapped her hands together giggling.
“yes, yes but first we are going to put on PJ’s okay.” Lena slits her forefinger over her daughter’s chubby cheek to keep her attention.
“yeah PJ’s.”
“A chroi, that means you have to stay here on the bed while I go and get them, okay.” Lydia nodded.
“Can you tell what to do?” Lena asks raising her own Luthor eyebrow.
“Stay here and wait for mommy.” Lydia answered proudly.
“Good girl, now wait for mommy to come back.” Lena stood up and made her way toward the other bedroom opposite the master bedroom. She had almost made it to the door when she heard yelling.
“Mommy! Don’t forget Leo and Luna.”
“Okay, a chroi.” Leo and Luna being her daughters' stuffed lion and wolf. Lydia had noticed that both her name and her mother’s name started with the same letter, so she wanted her ‘friends’ to have the same. Both Kara and Lena found it adorable, as did the super friends.
In the bedroom, she quickly took a new pair of PJs’. Picking the one that resembled Kara’s new suit, Lena also didn’t forget the stuffed animals.
When she got back inside the master bedroom Lydia was laying exactly where Lena left her.
“good girl.” Lena praised, picking her off the bed and kissing her cheek. Walking into the bathroom, she changed Lydia quickly. Lena herself changed into one of Kara’s hoodies she liked to steal.
“Ready for the movie?” Lydia nodded in the crook of her neck, but Lena didn’t miss how her daughter rubbed her eyes again and stifled a yawn.
It didn’t take long for the two to settle on the bed. Lena leaning lightly against the headboard with a couple of pillows propped behind her back to support her. Lydia nestled herself in her mommy’s front with head resting on Lena’s shoulder.
pulling the blankets up to Lydia’s chin she pressed play for the movie and waited.
  When Kara finally made it back home, she was met with silence. The apartment was dark, and Kara was a bit confused, normally Lena would be waiting for her. This made Kara scared that Lena was mad at her for not letting her know where she was.
Aldo her worries were washed away when she entered her shared bedroom. Lydia had fallen asleep and turned so that she was snuggling into Lena. Her stuffed animals squeezed between the two off them. Lena in her turn had also fallen asleep, having curled around Lydia.
Not wanting to wake them she floated into the bathroom and changed quickly. Standing in front of the bed Kara felled conflicted. She wanted to join her family, but she also didn’t want to disturb them.
  Lena noticed someone had entered the bedroom, Kara seemed to fill a room with a calming presence that put Lena at ease.
“Darling?” Lena’s voice sounded groggy from sleep.
“I’m here baby.” Kara answers sitting on her side off the bed.
“you're finally home.” Lena couldn’t help but smile.
“Yeah, sorry that I haven’t let you know where I was.” Kara said sheepishly.
“’s okay. Happy your home.” Said, half back to sleep again. Lena rolled over just enough for Kara to slip in beside her. Kara didn’t waste any time doing just that and hugging her two-favorite people into her.
Lena lets out a happy sight and rested her head on Kara’s shoulder. Kara fell asleep with a smile on her face.
  Kara was woken up abruptly by a small body jumping on her chest.
“MAMA! MAMA! Wake up, mommy is making pancakes.” Lydia creamed loudly.
‘I’m up. I’m up.” Kara grunted out not opening her eyes just jet.
“Iska could you be so kind and move your knees a little.” Kara finally opened her eyes to look at her daughter who had her knees planted in her ribs and both hands on her cheeks. Not understanding the question, she just repeated her excitement.
“Pancakes!”
Using her super speed Kara hoisted Lydia up in her arms and jumped off the bed.
“Alright little monster, let see what mommy is doing.” Kara chuckled while tickling Lydia’s tummy, making the girl shriek in laughter.
“no, mama don’t. no tickling.” Lydia breathed art between laughs. Both were still laughing when they med Lena in the kitchen.
“Morning.” Lena looked up from her stack of pancakes she made.
“Morning,” Kara answered when she slung her free arm around Lena and kissed her cheek.
Taking in the scene in front of her Lena couldn’t help feel her heart swell with love. The sudden emotions caused her to tear up a bit.
“I hope this never changes.” Lena whispered in a small voice in Kara’s neck. Kara having heard her gave her waist a small squeeze.
“I hope so too.”
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jamiexbowerx · 7 years
Text
10 Things to Hate About the iPhone
Of September i took delivery of my iPhone in the beginning, the start of a trying month personally that found me from the workplace for lengthy periods and only touching the globe via my telephone. It had been a baptism of fire for me and these devices. You shall have observed the adverts, used it in phone shops, viewed fellow commuters' shoulders, borrowed your friend's ... great isn't it? Or could it be? In this post I contact on some of the things about the device which have really irked me personally. A bit or quite a lot just. Also to keep up with the celestial karmic stability I've a companion content on a few of the reasons for having the iPhone that I definitely love. There's enough materials for both articles, I assure you! So right here we go, backwards order, the 10 factors that you should hate about the iPhone! 10. Grubby fingertips and the onscreen keyboard The iPhone's onscreen keyboard is surprisingly effective and doesn't take long to get accustomed to. Be sure you wash the hands just before you do therefore just, however! This is not just aesthetic: For reasons uknown I have the ability to keep a sticky tag under my right thumb that attract dirt, biscuit crumbs, or whatever, correct over the erase essential. Generally the crumb lands there just as I finish the two 2 web page email and begins to rub out the whole message character by personality! This is simply not an exaggeration!! It really is, however, not really a daily occurrence!! 9. External memory We went the complete hog and took the 16GB iPhone instantly. I don't regret it! I haven't been selective with my music collection and have pretty much all my ripped CDs stored on the iPhone. That's 14GB. Which leaves valuable little room for true data. On other devices that is rarely a problem and nonvolatile storage is usually flash memory of some description, how big is which obeys Moore's law and doubles in proportions and speed every 9 months or so and halves in physical size every 24 months roughly with a new "mini" or "micro" format. I have yet to perform out of space on a cellular smartphone or mobile phone, with an address book of over 500 names even. The problem on the iPhone is that there surely is no external memory slot no way (short of wielding a soldering iron) of expanding the inner memory. A shame. The ipod itouch has spawned a 32GB edition and I suppose the 32GB iPhone is coming. When that occurs the legacy user base will be left wondering how to proceed next. 8. Electric battery and battery life The iPhone is sleek - a centimetre thick and enticingly smooth with those rounded edges barely. There are few buttons, no little doorways to arrive open and break off in your pocket and no memory slots to fill with fluff and dirt. One of the known reasons for the smooth style is that the iPhone doesn't have a consumer removeable battery. The battery could be changed by an ongoing service centre, and over both years I'll keep this product I have a much to improve the battery at least once, but I cannot perform it myself. Also the battery can be surprisingly little - it needs to be to fit into this neat small package. The purchase price you purchase this is battery life. My gadget is currently 6 weeks outdated and also have been completely cycled about 5 times (I tend to keep the electric battery on charge but let it run flat at least one time weekly). EASILY is not continuously using these devices, checking the device twice one hour and answering phone calls just, using 3G and Press, I could rely on a full morning of 10 to 12 hours between charges. If I start WiFi this drops to 6 or 7 hours. If the GPS is utilized by me without WiFi, autonomy drops to four or five 5 hours. EASILY wanted to be frugal and last a complete a day really, I would have to switch off both Force 3G and email, and reduce screen brightness to the very least. For some social people this is a major issue. For me personally, since I either possess a PC on and can trail an USB cable, or spend your day driving with the iPhone installed as an ipod device and being billed by the automobile, it is much less of a constraint. Nonetheless it continues to be an annoyance. I haven't however noticed an iPhone equivalent of the Dell Latitude "Slice" - an electric battery "backpack" for the iPhone that could a lot more than double autonomy with reduced extra thickness, but I suppose that someone, someplace, is focusing on an aftermarket gadget. 7. Document management There is absolutely no exact carbon copy of the Windows Mobile File Manager or Mac Finder on the iPhone so there is absolutely no way of manipulating file objects on device. Admittedly the iPhone does a credible job of shielding you from the need to do any kind of file level manipulation: Including the Camera includes a photo album that is also available in other applications that require to gain access to images (for instance, the iBlogger application I take advantage of to create short articles on this website). But there are instances if you want to control individual file items still. One is during set up and set up when setting up root certificates for SSL to ensure that these devices can speak to an Exchange server: If you don't use Apple's enterprise deployment device (which locks straight down the device and prevents further configuration changes, thus not necessarily desirable), the only methods to set up these devices for Exchange are to create a short-term IMAP accounts and download an attachment that you open up, or to setup a website with the main certificate and define the correct MIME types on the web server (I possibly could not understand this to work, incidentally!). Just how much easier it could be to download the certificate onto the device using Home windows explorer (linking to a Personal computer vian USB exposes the devices memory as an attached storage space device) and also to have the ability to open the certificate document from memory space on the iPhone. The other key dependence on this functionality is when manipulating attachments on email messages. There is no real method of saving attachments, or attaching documents to a fresh or forwarded message selectively. 6. Navigating through email folders I have a tendency to preserve a complete large amount of emails in my own mailbox. I archive once a full year, and towards the finish of the next year usually. I'm also pretty busy and focus on twelve consulting and business advancement projects at the same time. That means a couple of things: a whole lot of email messages, and the necessity to sensibly organise those emails. I organise my email messages into trees - consulting projects in separate folders and these folders organised by client, all kept individual from businesses I'm committed to and from my own stuff. 40 or 50 folders probably. On Windows Cellular devices I can cleanly organise this quite, having the ability to expand or collapse parts of the folder tree. The tree is normally recognised by the iPhone, but provides me no method of collapsing the hierarchy. The Inbox is always at the very top: Junk email is usually always in the bottom. Moving junked emails means traversing the whole tree incorrectly, which is a discomfort using the classy flick scroll gesture also. It's clumbsy and unnecessary. 5. Filtering offline email content The other side of this complexity is managing just how much of my "online archive" to take with me. You don't have (no space) to take it all with me: I am quite used to putting sensible limits on the portion of the mail folder to take with me. Windows Cell enables me to consider 1, two or three 3 months worth of email with me, to state whether I take attachments with me, all the email or the headers just. I could select which folders to take or leave behind even. And I won't need to worry easily go away and discover I am lacking an essential folder - I can change the parameters and these devices will download what's missing. The iPhone is less flexible slightly. It won't i want to download accessories pre-emptively: It'll just load the message header and keep the attachment behind unless and until I select the email manually. I could define just how many days of email messages i from one day to 1 one month download, but beyond that I cannot specify a limit. I've a filtration system on the amount of messages within a folder that I screen from 25 to 200 messages however the interaction between this environment and the time limit isn't entirely clear. In case you are a light consumer that is less of a concern: For a heavier email user with a complicated folder hieracrchy you have much less control and may come across memory management problems as a result. 4. Message Exchange and management The worst problem with message management on the iPhone is specific to Microsoft Exchange actually. I am a specialist user and like Microsoft Exchange really. It isn't simply my mail server: It's a complete collaboration engine, with group and resource scheduling, rich address book, "to accomplish" lists, journaling, contact histories etc. I don't utilize it for fax and tone of voice mail yet, but that's just a question of failing to have made enough time to get the interface box to the PBX and convert that feature on. THEREFORE I is up there with the additional 60% of business mailbox users that are addicted to Exchange. When the iPhone appeared the Exchange conversation tale was weak 1st. It could do IMAP, but that's only a fraction of the tale. No nagging issue, that wasn't Apple's intended principal audience either, but the enterprise users wanted the iPhone, so Apple surely got to work. To be good to them, Apple have done a complete lot with iPhone 3G to enhance the Exchange story. The majority of the protection protocols is there, including crucial features like remote control SSL and clean, and it facilitates Push. Business deployment is easy as well with a devoted enterprise set up tool that supports remote device construction. Unfortunately Apple appear to have stopped halfway through the API and a complete lot of Exchange functionality is overlooked. A few of this, like losing some data richness within get in touch with and calendar products, doesn't have an effect on all users equally. Other components are more essential, however. The ultimate way to explain this is one way you forward electronic mails with attachments. The Exchange API permits customers to forward the message without the message content being kept locally: You can ahead the header and the server will connect the attachments and other wealthy content material before forwarding. The iPhone doesn't understand why: First it has to download all the message and accessories from the server to the iPhone, then it must add the forwarding address and send out the whole message back to the server. Shifting a note between folders is the consists of and same the same telecommunications overhead. A nuisance for me personally, but only that: If you aren't on a data bundle and pay out by the MB you then have to be cautious with this. [Another side-effect of the issue is certainly that server-side disclaimers and signatures get positioned by the end of the forwarded message, than under new message text rather.] 3. Reading HTML and rich texts I really like HTML emails. I understand that is considered a cardinal sin in a few quarters, but as somebody once stated, if email have been invented after http would email have been performed any other method? HTML is definitely ubiquitous, it really is clean and it functions. Not to mention being the very best mobile internet device available, the iPhone should be an excellent HTML email reader, shouldn't it? Well, it very is nearly. It can some stuff well really. The design is got because of it, it renders inline images, it'll even show some history. But what if the text is wide really? It'll wrap won't it? No, it will not. It'll shrink the written text to match. It'll make the text really, small really. And you can't cheat by rotating the device, making the display "wider" and the font larger, because the mail customer doesn't support scenery presentation (why?). Of course you can zoom in, because it's HTML, nevertheless, you need to scan the complete line then, whizzing over the page to the ultimate end of the line, then whizzing back again to get the beginning of another line again. Oh dear! 2. Task switching The iPhone is a pleasant, clean style. And area of the cool, clean look originates from the lack of nasty brief cut action control keys. The iPhone has only three buttons on the edges of these devices: the on/off button at the top, the volume up/down toggle on the relative side and the excellent single button mute button above the quantity toggle. That's it. The only other button on these devices may be the "home" switch on leading, below the display screen. The house button stops whatever application you are engaged on and goes to the house page of the device - the pretty page filled with icons that set up each application on these devices. Good work it's pretty, because you find a lot of it. There is absolutely no way to jump to your calendar directly, or address book, or email. In addition to the one "dual click" action (consumer configurable to either go for phone favourites or iPod controls), the only method to start an activity is to return to the home page or more again into the application you want. Discover a fascinating URL within an email that you want to check out in Safari? Memorise it well, or write it down, because unless the written text has been developed as a web link you need to get back to the house page, begin Safari, type the URL, realise you have it wrong, press the real home button again, start email, open up the email, find the URL ... and begin again. Or you could just choose the URL and trim and paste it in to the browser address bar ... except ... 1. How on the planet do you cut and paste? Once Xerox had invented the mouse, the GUI and WYSIWYG editing, it had been up to Apple to take that technology and make it affordable with the Lisa and the Mac. And Microsoft to create it ubiquitous, of program. Among the joys of using the mouse, or any pointing device, is that you will be distributed by it a third dimension as you maneuver around the page. You are not constrained by the line or the term or the paragraph - you can leap right to any portion of the record. And you could select elements of a record by dragging over an expressed term, a relative collection, a paragraph, and take action with it. Like reducing it out. Or copying it. Or dragging it. It's regular. That's precisely what you perform. You do not have 3 hour seminars and classes on utilizing a mouse (or a stylus) to point and choose, drag and click. You demonstrate it once, the training student understands and will it. However the company that helped the mouse get away from the lab and enter the shops appears to have forgotten about it. Obtain out your iPhone. Write a sentence. Write a different one. Oops - that second sentence would make even more sense Prior to the initial one. I'll simply slice and paste the sentence. Oh no you will not! Since there is zero paste and lower on the iPhone. Listen to that? No? Well, I'll state it once again! THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO Trim AND PASTE ON THE IPHONE. Google around a little and you will find a large number of articles about them. You'll find shock, indignation, horror. You'll actually discover brave Apple gurus explaining sagely that you don't want trim and paste since the iPhone offers you more immediate means of using information, like linking URLS, or detecting telephone numbers, or, er, something. The probably explanation is that once Apple has made a decision to get rid of the stylus, the only UI gesture was to use two fingers and drag that over the page to choose some text. But that gesture acquired already been used with the wonderful pinch zoom motion applied to large files and webpages. There exists a real way to avoid it, however. Some extremely credible proof idea demonstrations have already been place on the internet showing what sort of sustained stage and drag with single finger (just like the stylus selection action in Windows Mobile) will be workable rather than conflict with any various other screen actions on the iPhone. Let's wish that the idea demos function and we see cut and paste applied in an forthcoming firmware release. For the time being, at least every day I wager every iPhone user will silently curse twice, shrug and present up composing that urgent memo because they cannot become bothered to type everything again. So that's it. Do not misunderstand me, The iPhone can be believed by me is an excellent, transformational and iconic device. Much like the Mac pc, it has transformed our perception of just what a cellular device ought to be. Mobile phone smartphones and cell phones will never end up being the same again. It's that for all it's brilliance, it remains flawed. The iPhone may be the product of an excellent and prolific yet highly introspective band of engineers. Left absolve to innovate, unrestrained by any notion of practicality or truth or what the user currently thinks she or he wants, Apple have made a concept gadget. I'm grateful they possess, but I dread that it'll be to others up, with a clearer grasp of what an individual can use, specifically what ELSE an individual does, to consider the iPhone to another step.
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kelly-lynne · 5 years
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Yes, it is really this pretty in Frederick! 
While I’ve visited downtown Frederick before, every other time I’ve been in such a rush, I wasn’t able to really enjoy everything it has to offer. Just 50 minutes down the highway from Arlington, Frederick is nestled near so many places to hike it’s almost a surprise to know that Downtown Frederick is SO full of life and culture. Since Andrew and I had a wedding in the area, we stopped by downtown Frederick to eat, drink, and shop and enjoy everything this small-ish but thriving town had to offer.
Day 1
Black Hog BBQ
You can literally smell the deliciousness that is Black Hog BBQ from down the street! This is a great place to go for a casual lunch, but with an upscale edge. Black Hog doesn’t just do BBQ, they actually focus on the products they’re serving and make everything from scratch. We visited the downtown location, but there are actually four locations in the area to visit.
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BBQ sauces galore! Which is your favorite?
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Seen here: Brisket, ribs, cornbread, collard greens, mac and cheese, BBQ pork fries, every other food that Black Hog sells (nearly!)
Their meats are smoked in small batches and the meats are PLENTIFUL. Andrew and I just couldn’t decide what we wanted to get so we went for two Combo Meals. Our favorite was the pulled pork, I loved the leaner brisket (sorry, but I can’t do a fatty Texas brisket), and we both wanted even more of the amazing BBQ Pork Fries.
When I’m eating like a “lady”
How I really eat.
Honestly, you can’t go wrong here, it’s all delicious. Our server, Jamie Lynn was a pleasure and we had a great time choosing our faves and trying everything. Black Hog is situated right by all of the main street attractions in Frederick, which is perfect for walking off all of that food after a heavy lunch. Plus, if you want to keep the flavor strong in your life at home… you can take home their bbq sauce in a reusable mason jar! Score!
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…of course I got one!
Downtown Frederick Hotspots
After eating our body weights in smoked meats, Andrew and I decided to stroll along the main street in Frederick and do some shopping (okay, really I decided to do some shopping and Andrew came for moral support). A couple of the boutiques I had been to in the past, but I made a few stops that were totally new to me.
Our first stop was a second-hand store called Select Seconds which is a true thrift store. Managed by a local hospital, this store is MASSIVE! I picked up a cute cardigan for work, and a completely amazing southwestern inspired belt. If you’re a thrifter like me, definitely check this out!
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Diamond (soaps) are a girl’s best friend
A little further down, we checked out Treaty General Store, which was doing a succulent sale. I always kill succulents and I couldn’t look the saleswoman in the eye (any fellow plant murderers out there?) so we headed inside to look at amazing candles, accessories, and meaningful local gifts. This is a great place to shop if you know someone who likes receiving gifts that give back to their favorite non-profits like National Parks and other wildlife preservation initiatives. We picked up a candle that has a reusable cement container and smells like December. I’ll definitely have to come back to shop for my brother who is a huge hiking buff.
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Sale of these candles benefits the National Parks…and the container is reusable!
While we were scoping out some coffee, we found Tenth Ward Distillery and Bar, which was the perfect midafternoon pick me up. We just had time to grab some drinks at the bar, but the distillery also hosts tours. They also had what was essentially an adult Pumpkin Spice Latte, and so I definitely need to go back.
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Maven beauty bar is such decor goals!
Next, we hit up one of my favorite places in Frederick, Maven Beauty Bar. Sadly, they didn’t have any appointments that afternoon to get my brows or nails done but they were having a FANTASTIC sale on natural skin and beauty products. I spent entirely too long looking at their wares while Andrew sat on a plush couch. Eventually, I settled on the Meow Meow Tweet deodorant that I’ve been wanting to try for a while (it comes in a glass jar, yay no plastic!) and it was on sale for $7 and a Supergoop clear sunscreen stick with SPF 50.
Had a great day in Frederick shopping and eating till we dropped! In the evening we had a wedding a few minutes outside Frederick in rural Thurmont. So dinner and evening activities took place there!
Just across the street from Maven is one of my favorite stores, Anam Cara Apothecary, owned by one of my college friends! This store, carefully curated by a mom and daughter duo, is the perfect place to pick up beautiful essential oils and crystals and ask any questions you have about living more holistically. Tell Chelsea I sent you!
Day 2
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The Tasting Room
The Tasting Room is one of those places that you immediately get the feeling has been in the community for a long time and is well-beloved but consistently amazing no matter how often you go back. Our server told us she grew up coming to The Tasting Room as a special treat as a child and advised us to get the lobster chowder…which was honestly one of the most delicious things either Andrew or I have ever eaten. It wasn’t too thick, or too creamy, and was perfectly topped with chunky lobster without being overly “seasoned.”
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If the appetizers weren’t good enough, our entrees, duck with a seasonal hash, green walnuts, and steak with an entire crap cake on top of it were amazing…Andrew could barely wait to dig into his (as you can see from the photo below). The Tasting Room changes their menu seasonally and works with local providers, so you can go back and get something completely different every time you visit. Their menu was stocked with late summer/early autumn produce like strawberries, corn and squashes, which I love.
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Filet Oscar – aka Steak with a crab cake on top with the addition of butter and asparagus.
Definitely, don’t skip out on their sides (pictured above: lobster mashed potato martini, and potatoes au gratin) which are wonderful on their own or served with your entree.
For dessert, we ordered a carrot cake (bottom photo, top) and a pineapple bread pudding (bottom) and we finished both of them in record time. After all the food we had been eating, we thought we wouldn’t have room but we are SO glad we did. The pineapple bread pudding, though definitely not something I would normally go for, was light and airy and had a perfectly coordinating ice-cream that made it one of our favorite desserts we have had! The presentation of the desserts (notice those apple butter embellishments on the carrot cake plate) really added to the experience and were edible! Yum!
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Have you been to Frederick? Let me know what you did in the comments so I can plan my return trip! Want to see behind the scenes? I saved my entire Instagram story from Frederick in my highlights so you can view it anytime!
This post was sponsored by Black Hog BBQ and Tasting Room who graciously provided all of the food seen above. While this post is sponsored, opinions and dishes selected are based on my honest opinion (I wouldn’t steer ya wrong) and should definitely be eaten.
48 (delicious) hours in Frederick, Maryland While I've visited downtown Frederick before, every other time I've been in such a rush, I wasn't able to really enjoy everything it has to offer.
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kelseymfraburnnn · 7 years
Text
200: My crush’s name is: Machine Gun Kelly.
199: I was born in: Minden.
198: I am really: Lame?
197: My cellphone company is: Verizon.
196: My eye color is: Brown.
195: My shoe size is: 7-8.
194: My ring size is: My ex told me it was 7.
193: My height is: 5'2"
192: I am allergic to: Penicillin & sulfa. 
191: My 1st car was: a 2003 Ford Focus. 
190: My 1st job was: at a hog farm.
189: Last book you read: Tweak.
188: My bed is: not as comfortable as the last.
187: My pet: is at my exs. 
186: My best friend: is getting married!
185: My favorite shampoo is: Aussie. I think that's what it's called.
184: Xbox or ps3: Xbox?
183: Piggy banks are: legit.
182: In my pockets: NA.
181: On my calendar: Court.
180: Marriage is: dunno. Never had one. 
179: Spongebob can: make me laugh.
178: My mom: is the shit.
177: The last three songs I bought were? .....
176: Last YouTube video watched: Mgk.
175: How many cousins do you have? A lot.
174: Do you have any siblings? One brother.
173: Are your parents divorced? Yes. Thank you Jesus.
172: Are you taller than your mom? We're about the same.
171: Do you play an instrument? I played the clarinet in JH because my parents made me.
170: What did you do yesterday? Cried, drank, drove in the country. [ I Believe In ]
169: Love at first sight: No.
168: Luck: No.
167: Fate: No.
166: Yourself: Shit, on a good day.
165: Aliens: Nah.
164: Heaven: No.
163: Hell: No.
162: God: No.
161: Horoscopes: No, but they're fun to look at.
160: Soul mates: Fuck no.
159: Ghosts: Yeah.
158: Gay Marriage: Yep.
157: War: I hate it, but yeah.
156: Orbs: Sure.
155: Magic: No. [ This or That ]
154: Hugs or Kisses: Depends.
153: Drunk or High: Depends on what high.
152: Phone or Online: Eh.
151: Red heads or Black haired: Black? 
150: Blondes or Brunettes: Blondes, duh.
149: Hot or cold: Warm?
148: Summer or winter: Summer is more fun.
147: Autumn or Spring: Either!
146: Chocolate or vanilla: Depends.
145: Night or Day: Either.
144: Oranges or Apples: Apples.
143: Curly or Straight hair: Both.
142: McDonalds or Burger King: McD's.
141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: Milk.
140: Mac or PC: Don't care.
139: Flip flops or high heals: Flip flops.
138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Sweet & poor.
137: Coke or Pepsi: Doesn't matter.
136: Hillary or Obama: Fuck Hillary.
135: Burried or cremated: Cremated.
134: Singing or Dancing: I fail at both. 
133: Coach or Chanel: Chanel.
132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: Neither.
131: Small town or Big city: Either.
130: Wal-Mart or Target: TARGET.
129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Adam.
128: Manicure or Pedicure: Either.
127: East Coast or West Coast: Idfk.
126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Christmas.
125: Chocolate or Flowers: Either.
124: Disney or Six Flags: Six flags.
123: Yankees or Red Sox: Idgaf. [ Here’s What I Think About ]
122: War: Hate that it happens, but what do you do.
121: George Bush: He wasn't completely awful. I don't do politics.
120: Gay Marriage: Go for it.
119: The presidential election: That was awhile ago.
118: Abortion: Do your thing.
117: MySpace: Gone?
116: Reality TV: It's alright.
115: Parents: They're assholes sometimes, ha. But my mom is legit.
114: Back stabbers: Fuck em.
113: Ebay: Sketchy.
112: Facebook: Addicting.
111: Work: Good.
110: My Neighbors: Douchebags on the right.
109: Gas Prices: ....uh 
108: Designer Clothes: $$
107: College: Must do.
106: Sports: I like some.
105: My family: hates me.
104: The future: scares the FUCK out of me. [ Last time I ]
103: Hugged someone: Can't remember. River Rat?
102: Last time you ate: 6.
101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: Last weekend.
100: Cried in front of someone: Last week.
99: Went to a movie theater: Shit. Idk whenever Logan came out.
98: Took a vacation: LONG time ago.
97: Swam in a pool: Hmm, been awhile.
96: Changed a diaper: About a month ago.
95: Got my nails done: Really long time ago.
94: Went to a wedding: JULY 22.
93: Broke a bone: Last year.
92: Got a peircing: Last year.
91: Broke the law: Recently.
90: Texted: 10 minutes ago. [ MISC ]
89: Who makes you laugh the most: Me right now.
88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: Home.
87: The last movie I saw: I can't remember.
86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: Job, moving outta this bitch, self sufficient, being done with court/diversion, & stereo in my car with subs. 
85: The thing im not looking forward to: Court. Living here.
84: People call me: Kelsey, Kels, Kelso, a drug addict, a fuck up, etc.
83: The most difficult thing to do is: for me? When I got sober.
82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: True.
81: My zodiac sign is: Aries.
80: The first person i talked to today was: I don't remember.
79: First time you had a crush: 1st grade. 
78: The one person who i can’t hide things from:
I can hide feelings like a mahfucka. 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: River Rat.
76: Right now I am talking to: No one.
75: What are you going to do when you grow up: Shit, I wanna be a drug and alcohol counselor.
74: I have/will get a job: Working on it. Just moved.
73: Tomorrow: I gotta plate my car.
72: Today: sucked.
71: Next Summer: Will be 2018.
70: Next Weekend: will be great?
69: I have these pets: Karma... she's with my ex. :/
68: The worst sound in the world: Nothing comes to mind.
67: The person that makes me cry the most is: me.
66: People that make you happy: Friends whenever they come around.
65: Last time I cried: Today..
64: My friends are: Here & there.
63: My computer is: charging.
62: My School: was small.
61: My Car: is cute.
60: I lose all respect for people who: CHEAT & LIE.
59: The movie I cried at was: I can't remember.
58: Your hair color is: blonde.
57: TV shows you watch: SHAMELESS.
56: Favorite web site: Facebook I guess.
55: Your dream vacation: Away from here?
54: The worst pain I was ever in was: Liver failure.
53: How do you like your steak cooked: Medium rare.
52: My room is: small.
51: My favorite celebrity is: MACHINE GUN KELLY.
50: Where would you like to be: Not here.
49: Do you want children: Maybe one day.
48: Ever been in love: Yeah.
47: Who’s your best friend: Ramanda.
46: More guy friends or girl friends: Guy.
45: One thing that makes you feel great is: having my shit together.
44: One person that you wish you could see right now: Uhm... someone that makes me happy?
43: Do you have a 5 year plan: No. Fail.
42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: No.
41: Have you pre-named your children: No.
40: Last person I got mad at: Ex.
39: I would like to move to: Anywhere but here.
38: I wish I was a professional: MMA fighter. [ My Favorites ]
37: Candy: Hmm, skittles or starbursts.
36: Vehicle: Hummers or avalanches.
35: President: JFK 😘
34: State visited: Shit idk.
33: Cellphone provider: Verizon?
32: Athlete: David Beckham? He was that hot soccer player right?
31: Actor: Will Ferrell 😂
30: Actress: Shit idk. Jen Anniston.
29: Singer: MGK.
28: Band: Sublime.
27: Clothing store: Buckle, Hot Topic, wherever.
26: Grocery store: Walmart?
25: TV show: SHAMELESS.
24: Movie: Dazed & Confused.
23: Website: Facebook.
22: Animal: PUPPIES & foxes. They're cute.
21: Theme park: Six Flags.
20: Holiday: Thanksgiving for the food.
19: Sport to watch: Volleyball or football.
18: Sport to play: Volleyball.
17: Magazine: Cosmo.
16: Book: I really liked Tweak.
15: Day of the week: Weekend.
14: Beach: ?
13: Concert attended: Either Marilyn Manson or Papa Roach... shit or Korn. Idk.
12: Thing to cook: STEAK.
11: Food: STEAK & seafood.
10: Restaurant: Red Lobster.
9: Radio station: None.
8: Yankee candle scent: Dunno.
7: Perfume: Ed Hardy.
6: Flower: Rose.
5: Color: Black, teal, purp.
4: Talk show host: ?
3: Comedian: ?
2: Dog breed: Pitbull or puggle.
1: Did you answer all these truthfully? Yes.
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xcheybaby · 7 years
Text
Grace
Disclaimer: Some names of people and places have been changed for privacy reasons
“Cheyenne!”
        I turn around and a long-haired little girl comes barreling across the room and into my arms. I hug her as tight as I do every Wednesday night when I come to the town;s humble church to tutor my favorite first grader. The large meeting place turned cafeteria has large round tables with folding chairs filling the space. The small windows toward the top of the walls don’t let in much light, but the bright LED bulbs make up for the absence of natural light.
        “How have you been, Grace? I missed you this week,” I tell her. She giggles and tells me that she missed me too.
        “I made you something at school today!” She exclaims.
        “Oh, you did? What is it?”
        “It’s a surprise. Close your eyes.” I close them as tight as I can and I hear her digging around in her backpack. Finally, the rustling of papers stop and she taps my shoulder to let me know I can open my eyes. I open them and in front of me is a hand drawn picture of two girls, one tall and one short.
“It’s me and you!” she says as she hands it to me. “I made it during free time at school. My teacher helped me spell the words.” I look at the top of the page and “I love you this much” was scrawled in her sloppy handwriting.
        “See, my arms are out like this because I love you thiiiisss much.” She holds out her arms for another hug. I hug her tight once more. This is the last time I'll see Grace and I don't know how to tell her. The Study Buddy program is coming to an end for the school year, and I won’t be able to volunteer again next year. I decide that I won't tell her until it is absolutely necessary. My heart breaks at the possibility that I won't see my little Grace again. I can feel the sting in my nose as I fight back the tears.
"Come on, let's go get some dinner, okay?" I pull away from her so she can't hear my sniffling.
"It's mac and cheese today!"
 I remember the shy and scared little girl who was assigned to me for Study Buddies at the local church at the beginning of the school year. I remember praying for a girl when they were reading the names off on that first night. I mean, I would have been happy either way, but something about tutoring a young girl made me excited. I wanted to be a role model for her. And plus, all the young boys in this program were bouncing off the walls 24/7. I didn’t think I could handle their never ending energy for very long. But when they called my name and I walked up to the front of the room and saw Grace, my heart immediately felt both elated and saddened at the same time. I was ecstatic that I was assigned a her, but she was so scared that first day. Unlike many of the other kids who had been a part of this program for a while, this was her first day, too. The program leader, Val, introduced me to this very nervous looking child.
“Cheyenne, this is Miss Grace.” Val placed a hand on the girl’s shoulder. “And Grace, this is your new study buddy, Miss Cheyenne.” Grace stared at her feet. “Why don’t you say hi to her.”
Without glancing up, Grace spoke in the quietest voice, “Hello, Miss Cheyenne.” I bent down to her level and smiled. “You can just call me Cheyenne if you want.” Grace looked up at me for an instant and then back down at the floor.
“Okay.” She said.
 Watching her now, bouncing through the meal line, talking with all of the other first and second graders at a million miles an hour, smiling, laughing, it’s like she is a completely different girl. She is much more outgoing and confident than when I first met her. I’d like to take some credit for that. It makes my heart full to see her so happy and unafraid. After getting her tray, she practically spills her juice fast-walking back to our table.
“Be careful,” I warn her, but I can’t hide my laughter.
“I’m sorry, mac ‘n cheese is just my favorite and I couldn’t wait!” She flashes the brightest smile as she shoves the first spoonful into her mouth. “Aren’t you gonna get some?” She mumbles through her cheese filled mouth.
“I already ate before I came,” I answer her. She shrugs and continues eating her meal.
I hadn’t eaten before. Truth is, I was too nervous to eat. Trying to figure out what to say and when to tell her that I probably wouldn’t see her for a while, if ever, left my stomach churning. She finishes her last bite as Val claps her hands.
“Okay everyone, time to get started. Let’s all throw our plates away, please.” I grab Grace plate for her and stand up.
“I’ll get this tonight. Just grab your backpack and we’ll go pick a spot upstairs to do your work, okay?” She complies and we make our way up the stairs to the kids rooms. Our favorite couch is taken tonight and Grace pouts. “Ugh, I wanted to sit there!”
“Hey, it’s okay. We have to give some other kids a turn on the couch, right? We can’t hog it every week.” She sighs and picks a table on the other side of the room, near the coloring station. This girl loves to color. Every time we finish her homework and reading, she makes a beeline to the coloring station to get some crayons and paper. The church didn’t have coloring books, so I’d draw the outlines of trees, or stars, or farm animals, and she would color them in.
 For that past Christmas, I had spent hours upon hours making a special gift for her. She had told me once that she didn’t have any coloring books or crayons at home, and that gave me an idea. I stayed up for hours the night before I saw her for the Study Buddy Christmas party, drawing outlines of scenes for her to color in and even printing out some free Disney coloring pages I had found online. I compiled them all into a book, bought her a huge pack of crayons (you know, the 64 pack with the sharpener on the back — the one all the cool kids had), and wrapped it all up with a big bow. She opened it the next evening and she was confused. I had to read the cover of her new coloring book out loud before she understood what it was.
“It says ‘Grace’s Coloring Book.’” I pointed out each word as I read them aloud to her. Her eyes lit up and she squealed with delight. She put the book down carefully and wrapped her thin arms around me as tight as she could.
“It’s perfect,” she whispered to me.
 That was about five months ago and since then, we’ve colored a page together every Wednesday night. Each page a collaboration between the two of us. When the book was all colored up, I bought her a new one. And when the book was all colored up, I bought her a new one. Each page a collaboration between the two of us. I’ve been lucky enough to receive a page or two from her as presents and I proudly hang them in my dorm room.
But tonight, we will not be coloring. Grace has an ungodly amount of math homework for a first grader. “What are these teachers thinking?” I think to myself.  I help her through the math as best as I can, because sometimes I even struggle with first grade level mathematics. Then it’s on to geography. I help her identify all the states she has learned so far and she tells me their capitols.
After we finish her last page of work, she zips up her backpack and then looks at me with a gigantic smile. I know what she wants. I turn around to the bookshelf behind me and pluck out the same book we read together every Wednesday night, Where do Balloons Go?. We take turns reading each page out loud. She struggles with a particularly large word, and I help her sound it out.
“Sk-” I say. She repeats
“-eye”, “-eye”
“-scer”, “-scer”
“-ape”, “-ape”
“-er!” she finishes. “I remember now! It says skyscraper!” She giggles and continues onto the next line.
It’s amazing how far she’s come since she first started. Before I started tutoring Grace, she was below her grade level in reading. She could hardly read any of the books the church had in their small children’s library. I had to scour the shelves for something for her to start with. Now, I’m not crediting myself for teaching her to read, but I could tell she wasn’t getting any help from anyone else. Her teacher had too many students to be able to focus on Grace specifically. Her mother has two other kids, another on the way, and is too busy to help her with school work. I think I was the only one available. Having the appreciation for reading that I do, I was happy to help this young girl become a more efficient and passionate reader. By the time our tutoring was over, she had caught up with the other students and was now equal with them in level and able to join their reading group instead of being assigned an easier book all by herself. I was so proud of her. I still am.
Hearing her read words she had struggled so much with only a few months ago fills my heart with joy. She celebrates every word she learns and every book she completes. This book, Where do Balloons Go?, was even more special for one other reason. It had stickers. And not only normal stickers, but they were, as Grace called them, “magic stickers.” They could be removed and reused over and over again. This meant that every time she successfully read the book, she’s allowed to play with the stickers in the back of the book. She was able to create her own story with these stickers and it’s always a really fun way to end the night.
Val comes up the stairs and announces that since this was the last Study Buddy session for the school year, we will be taking a group photo in the gymnasium. I suck in a sharp breath and hold it in for a few seconds. I was having so much fun reminiscing my time with Grace and reading with her that I had almost completely forgotten. This is my last night with her. My class schedule for the following school year does not leave room for the weekly Wednesday night Study Buddy hour..
She grabs my hand and says, “Come on, we have to get a good spot!” I let her pull me along and the other leaders usher us to our spots for the photo. We are two of the first people to be placed in our spots which means we had a little time to wait before the photo was taken.
“Cheyenne,” Grace says in her smallest voice.
“Yes?”
“Are you coming back when I go back to school next year?” She looks up at me and waits for my answer. Damn her puppy dog eyes.
“I’m not sure,” I lie. I knew I wouldn’t be back, but I didn’t — no, couldn’t — admit that to her. I didn’t want to leave her without hope. But, I knew that wasn’t fair to her. Tears well up in the corner of my eyes and threaten to spill over.
“It’s okay, Cheyenne. I’ll miss you, too.” She hugs me and buries her face into my side. I bend down and hug her back tightly. In the last moments I spent with Grace, a flood of thoughts overrun my mind. This girl has impacted me infinitely more than I ever thought imaginable. Grace has taught me that I should never give up and to work through my problems even if I become frustrated. As I watched her overcome her obstacles with reading, she taught me how to overcome my own struggles. She taught me what it’s like to love someone else and that friendship can come from all people of different sizes and ages. Grace will always have a place in my heart no matter where I am. And as the photograph is taken, Grace whispers, “I love you, Cheyenne,” and I swear every muscle in my heart breaks.
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