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unforth · 8 months ago

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Danmei and Baihe C Novels and Manhua Officially Licensed in English

Things are getting licensed fast enough that keeping a list like this up-to-date is basically impossible, but I saw someone asking in the tags so I figured I'd try. All titles are danmei unless otherwise noted (very little baihe is licensed so far). I've included Chinese titles, but sometimes publishers change the original titles so much that I can't track them down, apologies. I've hit the link limit on this post so I've had to remove NovelUpdate links, but they're still in the version of this post on Wordpress. Note that Taiwanese titles are not included on this list.

This is everything I know of as of October 24, 2024. There might be more. I tried. Resources used to compile this list: Danmeinews.com; this Carrd, last updated in March 2023; this other carrd last updated October 23 2024; list of danmei with official licenses on NovelUpdates; a similar list on Goodreads; danmei-specific list on Reddit that to my eye looks accurate for the larger publishers but isn't thorough for some of the smaller ones.

Seven Seas:

The full list of danmei novels licensed by Seven Seas is here. The full list of danmei manhua licensed by Seven Seas is here.

These titles are in various stages of publication, from "entire series released" to "license literally announced less than a week ago." As far as I know, all Seven Seas titles are available world-wide, through major distributors and libraries, and in e-book and print formats. Seven Seas translation quality varies but the editing is general strong and the editions are sturdy and nice. Note that Seven Seas isn't without controversy, especially for treating their contractors poorly resulting in them unionizing. Some people have also been unhappy with the fidelity of their translations compared to the original Chinese (I've been satisfied personally but ymmv).

Mo Xiang Tong Xiu titles:

The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System (Ren Zha Fanpai Zijiu Xitong)

Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation (Mo Dao Zu Shi)

Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation (Mo Dao Zu Shi) manhua

Heaven Official's Blessing (Tian Guan Ci Fu)

Meatbun Doesn't Eat Meat titles:

Case File Compendium (Bing an Ben)

The Husky and His White Cat Shizun (Erha he Ta de Bai Mao Shizun)

Remnants of Filth (Yuwu)

Meng Xi Shi titles:

Thousand Autumns (Qian Qiu)

Peerless (Wushuang)

priest titles:

Guardian (Zhenhun)

Silent Reading (Modu)

Stars of Chaos (Sha Po Lang)

Fei Tian Ye Xiang titles:

Astrolabe Rebirth (Xing Pan Chongqi), written under the pen name Arise Zhang

Dinghai Fusheng Records (Dinghai Fusheng Lu)

Dinghai Fusheng Records (Dinghai Fusheng Lu) manhua

Joyful Reunion (Xiang Jian Huan)

Legend of Exorcism (Tianbao Fuyao Lu)

Mu Su Li titles:

Copper Coins (Tong Qian Kan Shi)

The Unseen Immortal of Three Hundred Years (Bujian Shang Xian San Bai Nian)

Lv Ye Qian He titles:

The White Cat’s Divine Scratching Post (Shenmu Nao Bujin)

The Wife Comes First (Qi Wei Shang)

Other titles:

After the Disabled God of War Became My Concubine (Canji Zhanshen Jia Wo Wei Qie Hou) by Liu Gou Hua

Ballad of Sword and Wine (Qiang Jin Jiu) by Tang Jiuqing

BAIHE: The Beauty’s Blade (Meiren Jian) by Feng Ren Zuo Zhu

The Disabled Tyrant’s Beloved Pet Fish (Canji Baojun de Zhangxin Yu Chong) by Xue Shan Fei Hu

I Ship My Rival x Me (Wo Kele Duijia x Wo de CP) manhua by PEPA

HET: Love Between Fairy and Devil (Cang Lan Jue) by Jiu Lu Fei Xiang

Mistakenly Saving the Villain (Lun Jiu Cuo Fanpai de Xiachang) by Feng Yu Nie

My Husband and I Sleep in a Coffin (Wo he Laogong Shui Guancai) by Wu Shui Bu Du

Run Wild (Saye) by Wu Zhe

There’s Something Wrong with the Chief (Du Zhu You Bing) by Yang Su

Thrice Married to Salted Fish (San Jia Xianyu) by Bi Ka Bi

The Villain’s White Halo (Fanpai Baihua Guanghuan) by Hao Da Yi Juan Wei Sheng Zhi

You’ve Got Mail: The Perils of Pigeon Post (Fei Ge Jiao You Xu Jin Shen) by Blackegg

Rosmei:

Rosmei licenses are Singapore distribution rights only. There is a list of international partners organizing group orders here. I've personally placed my orders through Yiggybean, as discussed in reply to this ask. Most of these titles are only being released as print editions, tho titles that weren't originally on JJWXC (of which there are several here) WILL have e-book editions. My first book from Rosmei arrived, and I found the translation and editing to be very strong. I can't speak to how accurate it may be to the Chinese original, but it read smoothly and had very few errors. Overall, though they've made some mistakes, they've been communicative and responsive.

Ning Yuan titles:

BAIHE: At the World's Mercy by Ning Yuan

BAIHE (I think???) The Creator's Grace by Ning Yuan

priest titles:

Coins of Destiny (Liu Yao)

The Defectives (Can Ci Pin)

Drowning Sorrows in Raging Fire (Lie Huo Jiao Chou)

Other titles:

Albert, from Earth (Aerbote Laizi Diqiu) by Jie Mo Jun

The Bat (Bian Fu) by Feng Nong

Breaking Through the Clouds (Po Yun) by Huai Shang

Don't You Like Me (Ni Shi Bushi Xihuan Wo) by Lv Tian Yi

The Earth is Online (Diqiu Shangxian) by Mo Chen Huan

Everyone Loves the Cannon Fodder (Chuan Cheng Wan Ren Mi de Paohui Zhuma) by Qie Zai Shan Yang

Global Examination (Qianqiu Gao Kao) by Mu Su Li

Gold Class Enforcers (Jinpai Dashou) by Pao Pao Xue Er

How to Survive as a Villain (Chuanyue Cheng Fanpai Yao Ruhe Huming) by Yi Yi Yi Yi

Kaleidoscope of Death (Siwang Wanhuatong) by Xi Zi Xu

The Killer of Killers (Sha Qing) by Wu Yi

Nan Chan by Tang Jiuqing

Obsessed (Ki Ma) by Wu Chen Shui

Wine and Gun (Jiu yu Qiang) by Mengye Mengye

Wow, You Guys are Really Good at Gaming (Nimen Nansheng Da Youxi Hao Lihai O~) by Yi Xiu Luo

Peach Flower House:

Peach Flower House titles are primarily for sale through their website and through some distributors, such as Amazon.com. Whether titles are e-book only, print only, or both varies by title. In my opinion, Peach Flower House has inconsistent inconsistent editing quality, but the books are very readable, and I'm excited that they're working with translators such as E. Danglars. I haven't bought any of their special editions so can't speak to their extras, but I've bought all their print translations and will continue to do so going forward.

Da Feng Gua Guo:

The Imperial Uncle (Huang Shu)

Peach Blossom Debt (Taohua Zhai)

Other Titles:

Golden Terrace (Huang Jin Tai) by Cang Wu Bin Bai

In the Dark (Zai Hei An Zhong) by Jin Shisi Chai

Little Mushroom (Xiao Mogu) by Shisi

University of the Underworld (Yinjian Daxue) by Ziloi

Via Lactea:

The partial list of danmei novels licensed by Via Lactea is here, but there are titles I've seen them selling that aren't on this list.

Via Lactea titles are primarily for sale through their website and through some distributors, such as Amazon.com. All titles are either print-only or e-book + print. Only a handful have actually been released, the rest are licensed and presumably in progress. I've now read three titles published by Via Lactea and while the translations are decent I could wish the editing was more consistent. Everything reads as if it would have been improved by one more thorough proof read.

Jing Shui Bian titles:

Salad Days (Jing Jiu)

Silent Hearts (Mo Mai)

Other Titles:

Apocalypse (Quanqiu Jinhua Hou Wo Zhan Zai Shiwulian Dingduan) by Qi Liu

As I've Told You Before by Sheng Jiang Tai Lang

Dawning (Liming Zhihou) by ICE

Embrace You Till the End of the game by Hu Yu La Jiao

Euthanasia (Anlesi) by Feng Su Jun

The Fall of Summer (Ting Shuo Ni Hen Nan Zhui) by Jue Chu

Falling (Luo Chi) by Yu Cheng

Psycho (Feng Zi) by Xiao Yao Zi

Limerence (Wo Xichen Ni Nan Pengyou Henjiule) by Jiang Zi Bei

Lingering Game (Chanmian Youxi) by Tao Bai Bai

Lip and Sword (Chun Qiang) by Jin Shisi Chai

May I Touch Your Spirit? by Qing Mei Jiang

The Missing Piece (Maoheshenli) by Kun Yi Wei Lou

The Omega Who Wants His Baby Back by Yao Yao Yi Yan

Raising Myself in 2006 by Qing Lv

Rose and Renaissance (Wo Zhi Xihuan Ni de Renshe [Yule Quan]) by Zhi Chu

Killing Show (Sha Lu Xiu) by Fox

Soul Vibration (Linghun Saodong) by Dr.solo

To Rule in a Turbulent World (Luan Shi Wei Wang) by Gu Xuerou

A Tyrant's Cover-up Plan by A Ci Gu Niang

Was I a Scummy Bottom? by Cheng Zi Yu

Aloha Comics:

A tiny, Hawaii-based press focusing on manhua. Titles are available through major retailers such as Amazon and Bookshop.org. I've purchased one of these titles - Nirvana in Fire - and was please with the quality despite a couple minor errors.

All these titles are manhua!

Day Off by Qing Cai

Heaven Official's Blessing Animation Manhua by Bilibili and Mo Xiang Tong Xiu (this is a manhua made based on the donghua, using donghua art)

Here U Are by DJUN

Link Click by Li Haoling and Haoliners (not technically danmei!)

Nirvana in Fire (Lang Ya Bang) by Hai Yan (not technically danmei!)

Monogatari Novels:

Monogatari Novels is based in Spain. These titles can also be ordered from at least some major retailers. Note that there has been some controversy about Monogatari Novels. I'm personally not ordering these works until more information is available.

BAIHE: A Clear and Muddy Loss of Love (Jing Wei Qing Shang) by Please Don't Laugh

BAIHE: Female General and Eldest Princess (NuJiangjun he Zhang Gongzhu) by Please Don't Laugh

How to Survive as a Villain (Chuan Yue Cheng Fanpai Yao Ru He Huo Ming) manhua by Yi Yi Yi Yi

The Legendary Master's Wife (Chuanshuo Zhi Zhu de Furen) by Yin Ya

The Silent Concubine (Ya Nu) by Qiang Tang

BAIHE: Soulmate manhua by Wenzhi Lizi

BLoved Publishing:

ngl I can't figure out exactly what is up with this, and there seems to be some controversy related to them and their relationship with Monogatari Novels. Their website is depressingly low on details. However, this list is for completeness, so here we are. I'm not ordering from them based on the information currently available. There's more about the conflict between them and Monogatari here.

How to Survive as a Villain (Chuan Yue Cheng Fanpai Yao Ru He Huo Ming) manhua by Yi Yi Yi Yi

The Legendary Master's Wife (Chuanshuo Zhi Zhu de Furen) by Yin Ya

Chaleuria:

As far as I can tell, Chaleuria has not updated their webpage since April 2023, so the current status of in-progress titles is unknown. All titles are digital and/or e-book, and I'm not sure how to purchase them as I haven't tried.

The Complete Guide to the Use and Care of a Personal Assistant (Zhuli Shiyong Zhinan) by Why Radiance

Deep in the Act (Ru Xi) by Tongzi

Fake Slackers (Wei Zhuang Xue Zha) by Mu Gua Huang (no longer available)

From Body to Love (Leng Yan E Nan: Xian Shenhou Ai) by Wan Wan Yi Xia

Interstellar Power Couple (Xingji Qiangli Lianyin) by Kun Cheng Xiongmao (no longer available)

Intoxicated Friends (Zui Qing Zhi Pengyou) by Ye Shu Ying

The Long Chase for the President's Spouse (Zongcai Zhui Fu Lu Manman) by Three Thousand Crow Language

No Money No Divorce (Mei Qian Lihun) by Shou Chu

Reborn into a Hamster for 233 Days (Chong Shengcheng Cangshu de 233 Tian) by Yi Shu

Records of the Dragon Follower (Cong Long Ji) by Yueren Ge

Urban Tales of Demons and Spirits (Dushi Yaogui Lu) by Qie Er

World Hopping: Avenge Our Love (Ni Wufa Yuliao de Fenshou, Wo Du Neng Gei Ni Song Shang) by Xiaomao Bu Ai Jiao (no longer available)

Webnovel:

When I first made this list, I heard that Webnovel had a few titles but couldn't actually find them - but now I've found them, thanks to a list someone else put together. I'm including direct links to them, since I had so much trouble finding them at all.

Comrade: Almost a Cat-astrophic Love Story (Jintian ye Yao Nuli Dang Zhimao) by Demonic Fire (link)

My Boyfriend is a Dragon (Nanpiao Shi Tiaolong) by Chubby Strawberry Sauce (link)

The National Sweetheart Livestreamer is a Pro! (Quanmin Zhubo Shi Duiba) by Mo Shang Wang (link)

Honorable Mentions:

There are a handful of titles I know of that are official translations of C Novels. These are not books with contextual queerness, but for folks with an interest in Chinese history and culture, they are worth checking out anyway, especially because understanding these stories can help understand the above books. Also, some have active shipping fandoms (for example, I've written for Romance of the Three Kingdoms and Daomu Biji). I've included two above under the entry for titles from Aloha Comics (Link Click and Nirvana in Fire) and here are a couple others I currently know of:

Dream of the Red Chamber (Hong Lou Meng) by Cao Xueqin, available in translation for free from Project Gutenberg

The Grave Robbers’ Chronicles (Daomu Biji) by Nanpai Sanshu (six volumes are available in English from Things Asian Press)

Journey to the West (Xiyou Ji) by Wu Cheng-en, in four volumes from University of Chicago Press

The Legend of the Condor Heroes (She Diao Yingxiong Chuan) by Jin Yong, in four volumes from St. Martin’s Press

Romance of the Three Kingdoms (Sanguo Yanyi), attributed to Luo Guanzhong, available in translations for free from Archive.org

The Seven Heroes and Five Gallants (Zonglie Xiayi Chuan), attributed to Shi Yukun, available in translation for free from Archive.org

Water Margin (Shuihu Zhuan) by Shi Nai’an, from Tuttle Publishing

RESOURCE: List of Chinese speculative fiction in English translation

RESOURCE: More Chinese speculative fiction in English translation

I will add to the "Honorable Mentions" list if I find any other more mainstream titles with official translations.

Rumored Licenses:

Sometimes, I hear rumors about titles being licensed before the license is announced - and thus before we know which publisher has licensed them (assuming the rumor is even true). I thought I should note these somewhere. Titles I know of rumors about currently are:

A Certain Someone (Moumou) by Mu Su Li

Devil Venerable Also Wants to Know (Mozun Ye Xiang Zhidao) by Cyan Wings

The Fourteenth Year of Chenghua (Chenghua Shisi Nian) by Meng Xi Shi

Guide on How to Fail at Online Dating (Wanglian Fanche Zhinan) by Jiang Zi Bei

Immortal Koi is Going to Debut (Jinli Daxian Yao Chudao) by Mo Xi Ke

Mist (Bowu) by Wei Feng Ji Xu

A handful of other licenses are mentioned on the Carrd I linked at the beginning of this post; I have no idea the status of those titles and wasn't able to find information on them while putting together this post other than what was listed on that Carrd, so I've omitted them.

Now go forth, and buy some books!

#danmei #baihe #mxtx #priest #priest novels #tang jiuqing #mu su li #meng xi shi #yi yi yi yi #this probably needs a billion other tags but oh well #i've been meaning to write something like this for ages #like there's literally a similar post saved in my drafts #but apparently today is the day i don't have the willpower to not #as also evidenced by my literally buying some of these books while in the middle of putting the post together lmao #i broke a windshield wiper on sunday and SHOULD spend money fixing that instead but here we are #at least it's the passenger side wiper???#anyway as always just tryin to do my part to get people to read more than just mxtx #not that i don't love mxtx #but please guys there's so much amazing stuff out there READ MORE BOOKS

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crazylittlejester · 26 days ago

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LU Links as things I did in the month of September (except two weeks late because i forgot to post it and it’s been rotting in my drafts-)

Time: Sat in the gamestop parking lot for TWO full hours waiting for the store to open so he could get the game he preordered because he thought the line would be super fucking long and he made a friend come with him and wait because he NEEDED his game, but he didn’t wanna get lonely. No one showed up till like 10 minutes too and at that point he’d gotten so distracted he ended up last in a line of 5 people and he was really upset about it

Warriors: Got bit by a mosquito and had a severe reaction to it but because he whines and complains about everything all the time people were just kinda like “yeah I’m sure it DOES bother you dude” but it was genuinely so bad he was on 3 meds for a week, had an allergic reaction, and had to go to urgent care. And on his way to said urgent care a lady told him he looked sad and handed him a 10$ IKEA coupon. When people in his life actually saw the size of the bite they were horrified

Twilight: Looked at his dog and cried because he didn’t understand why such a little creature would love him enough to fall asleep outside his room waiting for him to wake up in the morning

Sky: Stood outside in a rainstorm with his head down staring at his bare ass feet in his sandals that were getting absolutely soaked and decided he maybe DIDNT need to get the mail just then, but then slipped and ate shit in the garage because his shoes were wet

Hyrule: Drove 40 minutes for a can of pringles and three 3 musketeers bars. Intended to ration them out over the course of three days, but ate them all in one sitting and then got sad about it

Legend: Realized he can’t be sad if he’s screaming to FNAF songs in the car, and then realized yes he CAN be sad because FNAF songs remind him of his best friend who he really fucking misses. Now he listens to podcasts in the car because he will start tearing up if he listens to music in general while he drives

Wild: Spontaneously drove to a different state on a Thursday afternoon and the fact that it was a Thursday fucked with his internal calendar and for the rest of the weekend he was mentally one day off. But it ended up being great for him because he woke up and cried Monday morning but then realized it was actually Sunday and no he DIDNT have to go to school

Four: Ate so much chocolate he made himself sick and unfortunately this happened while all his housemates were out so he just had to lay there pathetically wishing he at least wasn’t lonely while suffering

Wind: Wakes up every god damn day and choses NOT to eat his dnd dice. It is a STRUGGLE. They look so fucking edible…

#linked universe #linkeduniverse #lu incorrect quotes #sort of #crack headcanons #jes talks

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majorproblems77 · 7 months ago

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Another day another LU analysis with me!

Dawn 9 is here and with it the end of the next arc of the LU comic is done!

This update did a lot and is also a full 10 pages long! So there's a bunch to unpack!

As always linked universe belongs to @linkeduniverse and Jojo, I own none of the pictures I'm using and please give the original post some love. It's very well done and I love this comic so much.

You can find the comic here!

Oh, and obviously spoilers for the most recent LU update if you've not looked at it!

Now, checklist. Popcorn, water and time to read half an hour worth of rambling.

Without further ado!

The letters!

So, Twilight, four and Time all appeared to get letters, with Time getting multiple (More on that later)

Twilights reaction to the super sale was my reaction while playing TP (I recently finished it for the first time! :D) when they opend the store in castle town. Every time i couldnt get there to get potions i was low key gutted.

And Four. Four's grandpa is a mood and i hope we get to meet him.

blorbo blorbo blorbo

The master of standing 🧍

Beloved blorbo i love him

Okay im done

(Im not done)

Poor Sky He's so sad about it D:

But... I, as a part of the The team is heading to Skyloft next, team. Believe that Sun has done this on purpose. (Or that the Skyloftians dont have the mail system for him to retrieve anything) but i like to think its the first one.

Hmmm.... Time got multiple letters. (That takes care of the letter discrepancy)

Twi asking about the ranch, Time looking to one of the letters. This tells me one of two things.

The letter he's looking to could be from Malon, and he's genuenly not concerned.

or The letter he's looking at isnt from malon. Infact, by the way he's looking at it i think its from his Zelda. Possibly a report about black bloods in his time period. (As last time we see them in Time's era. They dont actually fight anything)

Twilight being cheeky and Time's dad face are giving me life.

But... as we know, Time is Twilights direct decendant only by a few generations at most. With the infomation we have from Twilight princess with Shade. And from jojo with Time and Twilight. I'm seeing this conversation as more of a father and son conversation over brothers.

And the rest of this conversation follows this same pattern. Twilight is very much being scolded. He's biting back with what he see's as Time's own words. (not that time know's as such)

Twilight looks genuenly shocked to hear this.

From the hero's shade (Time) in twilight princess.

"You may be destined to become the hero of legend...but your current power would disgrace the proud green of the hero's tunic you wear. "

I am screaming

And now im screaming more. Twilight nooooooooooooo

The we care about Twilight's well being gang. Spoiling us with the full body shots againnnnnnn.

Give me more of these three i love them all together.

And I'm convinced that theres going to be something bad happens to time directly after the end of the LU timeline.

Time is missing an eye. So we know that Shade and Time are closer together than the hero of time (In game). SO.... If time dosent Die on the adventure with the chain. I'm almost convinced he does almost right after he returns back to his time.

The armour is almost identical. He has most of the scaring which lines up....

If the helmet turns up, then i think Time dies during this adventure. It's the only thing i can see as missing.

Twilight.... Now i think Twilight thinks that the gods are giving him an opportunity to save the hero of time from dying to become the heros shade. but thats the funky thing about timetravel.

(Depending on how Jojo and LU time travels works.)

I believe that the timetravel in LU solidifies the adventures of the other links. And that nothign that occours in this adventure impacts their adventures. Even if something was changed it wouldnt change the past.

IE - Twilight breaking his shadow crystal wouldnt mean that wild didnt remember having the wolf on his adventure - as its already happened.

(I hope that makes sense. - time travel is confusing i see it as an alternative timeline type thing)

Moving on!

Wild is best brother 101

Also twilight getting flustered about a girl oh bless this man i low key love him okay

Her!

Also

Smiley man

Epona is a wonderful girl and i love her so much okay

Also Warriors!

HE LOOKS SO HAPPY AGAIN

Man got his emotional support scarf and is no longer stressed (Atleast not visably)

HE!

BELOVED AGAIN HE IS SO HAPPY I AM NORMAL ABOUT THIS MAN

okay

Please understand how much i am cackling at the shenanigans of these three.

Wind rolling around because it is clearly faster mode of travel

Go zoomies wind go zoomies!

Wind rolled down the stairs you cant convince me otherwise. Look at his little superhero pose as hes moving around the corner.

Older brother alert, dont ruin the kids fun warriors they are just getting excited about being on the road again.

Also Warriors, This is normal link behaviour. Just ask Time. He would eailsy tell you that he rolled around hyrule field.

I LOVE HIS LITTLE FACE OKAY

MY BELOVED BLORBO 🧍

(if i run out of pictures i swear to hylia)

There's so much brotherly energy in these panels i love them all so much okay.

Also Sky offering to Pay Time back for the Inn Fee this is why i love the wonderful blorbo okay

Guys im sorry, he's their dad. You cant change my mind.

Thats a dad walk, with a dad sentence.

'Okay guys i need to make sure you are not gonna get killed please have swords.'

The blacksmithing gang getting the love they deserve.

Sky leading the charge! (I know its cause he knows the way and stuff But...)

It also makes a lot of sense. If Sky is the slowest of the group(Again not confirmed but we have had jokes about his stamina), it makes sense to put him at the front to maintain pace of the group. Stops people going too fast and prevents people from being left behind.

Which i might add has already happened. (Warriors and Hyrule im looking at you.)

We just need to read the boss partterns for a bit so we can then decide how to fight it. You know, like we did when we were in our adventures and had to figure out boss mechanics.

Important that hyrule is saying this as his game is arguably one of the hardest. He probably spent a long time on each boss learning attack patterns.

Oh this arc was fun! So much fun i love it so much okay

Thank you so much again for hanging out with me while i write these. I love making them and i really appreciate all the support on them. (If you could share it around i'd really appreciate it :) )

Have a wonderful day! :D

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dangermousie · 4 months ago

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Hey dangermousie some time when you're feeling up for an ask: what are your favorite webnovels? Like danmei, bg, general fiction, anything. You've shared so many intetesting sounding novels in other posts so I was curious what some of the top favorites are? I remember Sha Po Lang, Ever Night, and The Dreamer in the Spring Boudoir (which I'm reading because of you ToT)

I love this ask! I am gonna limit myself to 35 novels or we will be here all night. The usual caveat is - this is very personal. You will see that out of 35 (well, 36) novels, there is only one modern, there is a lot of angst and things like noncon and unhealthy relationships don't bother me. But I dislike harem infights and protags who are too OP.

35 I Became the Older Brother of the Heroine in an Abusive Novel by Liu Gou Hua (danmei) - a lovely novel where one half of otp is healthy and wholesome and the other abused feral wreck who melts under sanity and care.

34 After the Disabled God of War Became My Concubine by Liu Gou Hua (danmei) - our MC is a modern person who transmigrates into a historical bad guy who apparently married a captured and crippled general who eventually healed, escaped and committed a lot of murder to avenge his humiliation. Poor historian MC transmigrates right before the wedding and is desperate to avoid the fate of having his head hang on the city gates for three years in the near future. Good luck! This has such a wholesome (yet not boring) OTP. Proof that healthy doesn't have to be dull.

33 You've Got Mail by He Dan Bai (danmei) - the sex in this one is gonzo and biologically questionable but the love story is wistful and sweet and somehow both hilarious and involving two rather damaged people.

32 The Blue Whisper by Jiu Lu Fei Xiang (het) - the novel is a bona fide angst masterpiece, which really delves into what it feels like to be imprisoned or to love and what makes you you. I sniffled throughout.

31 The Paranoid Emperor’s Black Moonlight Shizun by Chen Sensen (danmei) - a really screwed up disciple and a really decent master have some insane entanglements. To say more would be to spoil but if you want some intensity, angst, groveling and utter codependency and did I mention ANGST? this one is for you!

30 Demon King's Repayment by Gong Xinwen (het) - another delicious Gong Xinwen tale with a powerful ML dedicated to capable FL. This one is a great fantasy plot (I keep imagining it as an animated series) and a sprawling cast of amazing secondaries (and secondary OTPs - there is, I swear, an OTP that is Dong Hua x Feng Jiu done thru GXW lens) to boot.

29 Accompanying the Phoenix by Jiu Lu Fei Xiang (het) - the one that just got adapted into The Legend of Shen Li, this is high adventure and cottage core and funny and tragic and powerful ML being putty in the hands of capable FL and just EVERYTHING.

28 The Counterattack of the Cannon Fodder Chambermaid by Jia Mian De Sheng Yan (het) - I remember starting this and loving the realistic feel and the heroine and wanting to stab the hero. Yet the end I was on board with both the hero (who was abused and is rather autistic-coded) and the OTP. Anyway, heroine is a servant who was a concubine in the last life and got killed as part of a rich family’s harem intrigues. In this life, she just wants to keep her head down but her life gets derailed anyway. She gets sold away and eventually made a servant in the household of an exiled prince who takes a fancy to her and she endures it because what choice does she have? All she wanted was to serve out her term and become a small time merchant. This is quite realistic about lack of options for women, especially lower class women or upper class male attitudes (ML is never vicious or mean to FL but it does not initially occur to him to wonder if she fancies him or enjoys being his concubine or w/e.) It is a DELIGHTFUL slow burn tho as they grow to love each other and grow together and become one of the most wholesome cnovel couples out there.

27 The Black Moonlight Holds the BE Script by Teng Luo Wei Zhi (het) - so fucked up, so good, with monster hero who learns to love and be human and heroine who learns to love and be human (but from the other side, her tower of perfection), with a complex plot and no easy outs.

26 The Grand Princess by Mo Shu Bai (het) - a husband and wife who really drifted apart and ended up killing each other (or did they?) get a second chance as they are reborn as their younger selves. This has a great plot, a competent set of protags, and slow burn with complexity and trauma and somehow yet lightness. Plus awesome secondary OTPs!

25 Copper Coins by Mu Su Li (danmei) - a monk and a dragon? More likely than you may think. This is smart and wistful and made me cry; the romance doesn't kick in for the longest time and it doesn't even matter.

24 The Golden Terrace by Cang Wu Bin Bai (danmei) - two smart and principled (yes, they both have principles different though they may be) men navigate their arranged marriage, their past friendship and their past break up, become a super couple (one of the healthiest danmei couples I’ve ever read and proves healthy doesn’t have to be boring), save the country and bring down the emperor or two and just generally this is my rainy day book.

23 Long Wind Crossing (Destined) by Mo Shu Bai (het) - two functional lovely people fighting the world and growing up together and forming an amazing marriage.

22 Mistakenly Saving the Villain by Feng Yu Nie (danmei) - so underrated. A perfect h/c fantasy with the most functional MC and fucked up ML that never puts even a toe wrong with a premise that could go seriously bad so many different ways, instead telling a funny, moving story of love helping you heal.

21 I'll Be the Male Lead's Sister in Law by September Flowing Fire (het) - one of my all time favorite novels. Heroine is made to marry a disabled nephew of the emperor. He used to be a victorious god of war but went mad and now is basically locked away and kept as a beast. GOD I LOVE THIS NOVEL SO MUCHHHHH! So much hurt/comfort and awesome OTP and after he eventually recovers, all he wants to do is to fight and murder things and dote on wifey. MMM. He’s honestly one of my fave MLs.

20 The Rebirth of a Star General by Qian Sha Cha Ke (het) - not a typical QSCK at all, this one has a heroine who wakes up after being killed by her awful family; in her past life she was a general whose glory went to her cousin but here she chooses to start anew. Revenge is secondary to her - forming a new life and healing are really the focus. Also the OTP (FL and a male general with his own tragedy, and her former schoolmate) is just EVERYTHING!

19 Nan Chan by Tang Jiu Qing (danmei) - it reads like poetry crossed with a nightmare. One of the most unusual novels I've read and with the most alien set of protagonists I've ever read and believably so (a personification of a sword and a cannibalistic fish), I can't even describe this in any way other than a deity-centric paean to atheism.

18 The Rest of My Life by Mo Shu Bai (het) - the sole modern on this list, this is a novella about an aftermath of a regular office worker with a regular life and a regular husband being raped. It's a hard hard read but it's amazing.

17 To Rule In a Turbulent World by Fei Tian Ye Xiang (danmei) - gay Minglan is my elevator pitch. Well that or "what happens if you stick cottagecore and crucifixion in one novel."

It’s a BL novel but honestly, it’s a slice of life period novel with fascinating characters and setting that happens to have a gay OTP, not a romance in a period setting per se. It’s meticulously written and smart and deals with character development and somehow makes daily minutia fascinating (I never thought I’d find daily farming things interesting but here I am.) Farming, politics and the sudden horrors of war all intermingle perfectly.

Our protagonist, You Miao, is the son of a fabulously wealthy merchant, sent to the capital to make connections and study. As the story starts, he buys a sex slave on a whim from his friend (OK, wait wait wait don’t go, why are you bailing :P) Basically You Miao sees his friend’s servants beating someone to death, feels bad, and buys him because, as we discover gradually and organically, You Miao may be wealthy and occasionally immature but he is a genuinely good person. Let's back up - You Miao - our protag. He is the main reason I love the novel. It’s hard to write a character who is wealthy, kinda spoiled, sometimes immature and still make him eminently likeable. You Miao is also smart, pragmatic, funny, surprisingly laid back, a people person, and with a stubborn streak a mile wide. He is not perfect in any way but he is a real living breathing person I came to love.

Anyway, the ostensible sex slave he buys is a barbarian from beyond the wall, named Li Zhifeng. It’s touch and go if the man will survive but eventually he does and You Miao, who by then has to return home, gives him his papers and lets him go (not before they have some pretty explicit sex because hey - You Miao is all ‘why not, might be fun to try’ and LZF is “dude saved my life, why not.’ One of the things I love about the story is that there is no instalove - both sex and love make sense in the way and the order they happen; the two bang on a semi regular basis long before their feelings fully develop into love, which is pretty gradual and realistic.) However, LZF decides to stick with You Miao instead, both out of sense of debt for YM saving his life and because he genuinely likes him. One of the pleasures of the novel is watching LZF slowly transform from a piece of wood automaton into a genuine person who allows himself joy or temper.

So meticulously written, so smart, so vivid, such a cast of secondary characters (that friend who was beating LZF to death ended up being one of my favorite, most tragic characters in the novel because the author gets people are complex.)

16 The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System by MXTX (danmei) - a pastiche parody of web novels that somehow is both witty and makes me genuinely feel desperately for the protags. Go read!

15 Dandere General and His Lord by Gong Xinwen (het) - God, I love this one. Heroine transmigrates from modern world into a brutal slave-holding world at war (think something like Warring States era.) Our heroine transmigrates into the body of a noblewoman who just hung herself. When she comes to, she discovers that woman’s twin brother was the ruler of a city poisoned by a rival claimant and the besieging army of said claimant is about to take the city and original occupant of the body and the rest of the family chose suicide as a way to avoid dishonor. Our heroine refuses, schemes with advisors to pass as the brother and rally the troops. Once the invaders are defeated, she keeps on the masquerade and rides off to one of the never-ending wars “she” is summoned to. Our hero couldn’t be farther from this. A slave and a son of a slave, he’s escaped a horrific, starving childhood during which he narrowly avoided being murdered or raped, and ended up in the army. When the story opens, he distinguished himself in battle and as a reward, he and a few of his fellow slave warriors are invited to a banquet, where they are given some alcohol and to be playthings of any nobles who want them. One of them does not survive this but ML is lucky - heroine feels terrible and so “claims” him for herself. Instead she just tends to his wounds and sends him back. She does not fancy him or anything, she is just a human being with a conscience. And the story goes from there.

14 The Marquis Is Innocent by Peng Lai Ke (het) - this is the set up of very beautiful yet utterly cold-hearted woman marrying a ruthless, powerful man who eventually ends up on top of the murder pyramid. And a relationship that starts as a political arrangement with the husband not caring for her but then the ruthless scheming murder machine falls hard for her while FL actually does not, not yet. It takes a long time. This is such a glorious slow burn (I think by now you realized I love slow burns) and it takes her a very long time to open up or for him to realize that is what he wants (he's a very believable period man who finds it hard to admit he can actually have his happiness based on a woman) and there are steps forward and back and it's glorious, glorious!

13 Thousand Miles of Bright Moonlight by 罗青梅 (haven't seen it transliterated) (het) - one of my ultimate favorites, this would make such an epic drama! A smart as hell but cautious and wounded heroine, a hero who is a monk and a warrior but also terribly ill and such a vivid world and amazing secondary characters (heroine’s brother is possibly my favorite supporting character of all time) and so much angst and happy ending. Both the protags are such intense, good people longing for happiness but not daring for it. This has an amazing romance but it’s not romance-centric if it makes sense - ML doesn’t appear for a while. But once he does, it’s worth it!

12 Mountain and River Pillow by Mo Shu Bai (het) - a tender intense and tragic slowburn which shows the limits of knowing what will happen and the fight to reestablish the family with an amazing amazing OTP. Heroine transmigrated into her past self; this time she chooses to go through with her arranged marriage instead of running away for love (it ended badly) but her knowledge fails to prevent her new sweet husband and his whole family murdered in battle and framed for treason. All that is, except for her husband's youngest brother, barely adult and left with an almost impossible task. In the past life he managed but it hollowed him out. In this one he has a sister in law to assist so...Anyway, both the protags are smart, good, intense and amazing people and I love them separately and as an OTP. By far my favorite MSB novel.

11 Those Years In Quest of Honour Mine by Man Man He Qi Duo (danmei) - another really underrated gem, it’s funny and heart-breaking and made me laugh and sniffle within pages of each other. Its two protagonists are both walking wounded but also good people, and watching them find happiness despite all the horrors the world threw at them, watching them take care of each other is so lovely. Also, someone once described the ML as “Lan Wangji gone feral” and that is just A++++

10 The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation by MXTX (danmei) - we all know that one is there even any point describing it.

9 Nightfall/Ever Night by Mao Ni (not romance centric but het) - so long but also so smart and unusual and bloody and tho it’s not primarily a romance, you will never see another ML who loves his FL as much as Ning Que does his Sang Sang. And the worldbuilding and the plot and the characters and just so so bleak.

8 Wu Chang Jie by Shui Qian Cheng (danmei) - are you an emotional vampire? I am and this novel is a banquet. In a highly fantastical setting, we meet our protagonists - the sunny Xie Bian and the intense and surly Fan Wushe. Xie Bian is a human who assists his master in conveying souls to the underworld and making sure no mishaps happen. Bian is concentrated sunshine in human form and to meet him is to love him. When the novel opens, his drunk master brings back another human to be his shidi and assist with duties - said human is uncommunicative, intense and surly Wushe. Bian is excited to have a shidi but little does he know that a story dealing with the horrors of past lifetime is about to start.

Anyway, why WCJ? So many reasons. It has such a dark bleak worldview - this world is a horrifying system where powerful cannibalize each other’s cores for an impossible chance to ascend, where gods have sealed off their realm and all that’s left is neverending human misery and hell (the only way you’d see a deity is if they’d been sent down to suffer over and over and over), where even reincarnation doesn’t fix things and bad acts are often unpunished. And the novel then asks - is it worth being a good person in such a world? More, is it worth being a good person in such a world when nothing good has ever happened to you and you have been repeatedly betrayed due to your goodness? And the answer, on Bian’s part, is an uncompromising yes.

Ah yes, the other reason to love this novel - the protagonists and their fucked up fucked up relationship. Bian (who was Prince Ziheng in the past life) is so genuinely good. But he is that rare thing - good but not saintly, noble but not cloying. So much of the novel is his getting taken apart over and over and barely able to put himself back together every time but his soul is still as amazing as ever. And then there is Wushe (who was Prince Zixiao in past life, Ziheng’s not-bio-related brother.) Wushe is not a good person. He is a monster. And he loves Bian/Ziheng more than his life and his soul and the entire world but he’s also the one who hurt him more than anyone else ever could and did it over and over. His love survived a literal century of torture in the worst kind of hell and refused the usual memory loss of new life. But it also humiliated and broke Ziheng down to his constituent parts.

One of the things that is so fascinating to me about this novel is the question of what can be forgiven/what should be forgiven/what kind of expiation is enough/can you ever love someone who you loved so much and then he hurt you so badly and is now repentant? And it never sweeps trauma under the rug or hand waves it away but deals with it head on. If you want healthy relationships, you should stay far away from this novel but if intense insane ones with a feral barely human one capable of destroying the world leashed by love and guilt to the sane deeply good one is your bag, come right in. There is also the world building and the fact that yes, the big fall out between Ziheng x Zixiao is based on not knowing all the facts but it’s not “why can’t you talk?! This is dumb!” But is totally in keeping with both events and their characters. It’s reasonable for Ziheng to do what he does and for Zixiao to misunderstand and decide Ziheng is now his biggest enemy (but still one he’s fixated on) and for Ziheng to never be able to clarify. Anyway, once again this is trigger warning central so please heed those, but if they are no issue, this one is wonderful.

7 Stars of Chaos (Sha Po Lang) by Priest (danmei) - so smart and so much clever world building. There is enough politicking to satisfy a Qiang Jin Jiu fan, it’s steampunk, and our two protagonists - Gu Yun, the empire’s most powerful general, who’s loyal to the empire despite being badly wronged by it, and Chang Geng, a cursed prince with barbarian blood and horrifying childhood - are wonderful separately and together. This is a huge slow burn but it’s totally worth it! They fall in love with each other’s hearts and brains and ability as much as anything. (Yes, this is the one with the yifu thing. Gu Yun is made Chang Geng’s foster father when he rescues him and brings him back to the capital as a way to keep CG safe in imperial strife. They are 12 and 19 at the time so clearly it’s never a parental relationship.)

6 Heaven Official's Blessing by by MXTX (danmei) - I love it’s sprawling narrative and cast, I love its inventive setting and picaresque story. It’s hilarious and can make me cry. But the novel’s place on this list is due to Xie Lian who is part Kenshin part drama WWX part pure goodness wrapped in heartbreak and trauma wrapped in sunshine.

5 (tie) The Emperor’s Beloved Ugly Girl by 一味相思 (haven't seen it transliterated) (het)- Our heroine is the unlucky laundry maid A’Chou. She is a di daughter of an upperclass family but her family got destroyed in one of the political upheavals of the time and A’Chou, only a small child at the time, was the only survivor and was made an enslaved laundry maid. Due to various events, at the start of the novel she is a laundry maid in a minister’s household and the minister’s beloved daughter is having a fit because she’s supposed to marry the former Crown Prince which may have been great a few years back but Crown Prince had since been deposed, tortured, imprisoned and now is living in the middle of nowhere under conditions that are too meager to be called house arrest. And he’s seriously crippled too. Understandably, the young lady doesn’t want to marry him! She’d rather kill herself and so she does. And so, a desperate plan is hatched - why don’t we pretend the laundry maid is the di daughter of the minister’s household and send her off? And so A’Chu is sent as the bride. She arrives to discover a broke, seriously injured man on the verge of death…and we go from there. This is so gorgeous and tender and slow in just the right way and like AAAAAA! Secondary OTPs (one of which is MM) are also epic.

5 Wishing You Eternal Happiness by Peng Lai Ke (het) - this is almost tied with Dreamer as my favorite het web novel ever though it couldn’t be more different from Dreamer, with its hard-edged and hard-souled protagonists ruthlessly cleaving their way to the world and, eventually, each other, its smart cynical air. Except in one thing - the world of Wishing is just as bloody and dark. Its two protagonists are gentle, deeply wounded souls who may find salvation in each other but even something as basic as safety almost seems out of reach. Jliafu, our heroine, is neither a modern-day transmigrator, nor some exotic princess or demoness. She is very much a period woman of her time, from a weathy merchant clan, whose beauty is her curse. You can tell the novel’s tone from that utterly bleak opening chapter where she, a favorite concubine of a capricious dying emperor, is ordered to be buried alive with him and is not even given the “grace�� of white silk but slowly suffocates in the coffin, scrabbling at the lid. There is no grand threats of vengeance on her part, not dramatic opera events. Just despair and death. The whole introductory chapter is haunted by emotional ghosts - the empress’ unrequited love for the monster on the imperial bed (turning into desire for Jiafu’s suffering after he dies), the emperor slowly dying in his prime after waging too many wars, and his fear of being haunted by Pei Youan, a brilliant if sickly minister who died of illness long ago on one of imperial campaigns. There is no triumph for anyone, only loss.

When she wakes up as still a young woman, all she wants is to escape the same fate. There are no plans for power or revenge, only a desire for survival. And so she latches on asking for help from Pei Youan, the only man in her past go-around who showed any consideration and desire and ability to protect her, though he barely knew her. Pei Youan is probably my favorite het web novel ML. Despite his brains and ability, he drifts through life. In modern terms, he clearly has depression. One of the biggest, best joys of the novel is watching these two very good, very quiet, very wounded people discover happiness and love with each other. I sort of want to cry just thinking about it, tbh.

4 Ballad of Sword and Wine (Qiang Jin Jiu) by Tang Jiu Qing (danmei) - a dense political tome that takes a while to get going but then it’s a runaway train. In a fictional dynasty, Shen Zechuan, the only remaining son of a disgraced aristocratic family and Xiao Chiye, the younger son of a family of generals guarding the border join forces (and then something else) to get power and pull down the dysfunctional system.

This is so elegant and smart (a rare web novel I’d recommend to anyone who just loves solid period fiction) and you probably need a notebook to keep track of the politics and military strategy. These characters are very very smart not just because the author says so.

As to the characters, there is a large cast and I love many of them, but for me the novel is made by Shen Zechuan and Xiao Chiye. SZC is gorgeous and delicate and icy and can kill you before you have time to blink. Saddled with the sins of the family he had no pleasant interaction with, he claws his way out of hell (seeing the sinkhole he was trapped in, literally as well) to take down those who wronged him but also to amass power so all the tragedy and corruption won’t happen again and the whole rotten system comes crashing down. XCY is a military genius who is trapped as a hostage in the capital because the court doesn’t trust his family. He longs to return to the plains of home and to take his rightful place. The two men start out as bitter enemies, then reluctant and sniping allies, then as friends and eventually as one of the most gorgeous, tender, swoony OTPs. Anyway this is one is a bona fide masterpiece, equal parts smart and emotionally intense.

3 Dreamer In the Spring Boudoir by Bai Lu Cheng Shuang (het) - my n1 het novel on this list, smart and fierce and don’t really read this for romance because it does not start until really late, but ice cold heroine x ice cold hero both of equal brains and ruthlessness is everything. I went from loathing the ML to finding him fascinating to adoring him (and yet he softened around the edges only for FL, he never became ��nice”) and loved FL throughout; secondaries are epic. If you read only one non-danmei web novel, make it this one.

2 Stains of Filth (Yuwu) by Meatbun Doesn't Eat Meat (danmei) - another novel by the author of 2ha. Clearly she just pushes all my buttons every time. This one is much shorter and has a plot that is twisty but less twisty than 2ha. Still, all that means is that intensity and the pain are more concentrated. Aristocratic Mo Xi and former slave Gu Mang were both legendary generals of the empire and lovers. But Gu Mang betrayed the country and switched to the enemy. Now he is back as a peace offering by that country and Mo Xi has to deal with the fact that his feelings are as strong as ever.

This novel!!! So much pain and intensity!!! So many amazing plot twists and supporting characters. The same bleak world view, the same unjust society, the same protagonists doing right things despite the cost. Mo Xi’s intensity and inability to let go (he’s imprinted on Gu Mang and that’s it) is romantic, bone-shakingly intense, and tragic all at once. And oh Gu Mang! So many times I just wanted to reach into the book physically to protect him. The novel deals with unjust societies, memory versus personality, what it’s like to be good in a bad universe etc. And it both made me sob and giggle, repeatedly, and sold me on literally death-defying (but not honor-defying!) love. Oh, and special shout out to the fact that like 2ha, you may start out hating some characters and end up a rabid fangirl (cough Murong Lian!)

1 The Husky and His White Cat Shizun (2ha) by Meatbun Doesn't Eat Meat (danmei) -my n1 forever and ever.

Taxian Jun, the horrific cultivation emperor of the world who razed cities and destroyed sects, is surrounded on his mountain. The righteous sects are terrified to confront him but tired of living, Taxian Jun consumes poison and dies by suicide at the age of 32. And opens his eyes as 16 year old Mo Ran, Mo Ran long before he became Taxian Jun, Mo Ran who is excited at a chance to save the one person he loved and lost. Oh, and to deal with his loathed shizun, the unapproachable and strict Chu Wanning, his past life’s biggest enemy.

I have no idea if it’s objectively the best on this list but it hits every trope I love, its bleak worldview (the world will change only incrementally but that’s enough, average person will not appreciate the sacrifice but it’s still worthwhile, and love is worth everything) mirrors mine, and the sheer complexity of the plot and cascade of plot twists each of which is insane and yet completely logical, is amazing (this is a rare novel where it’s even more fun to reread than read for the first time because you keep seeing all the hints and trail crumbs laid out that you did not see the first time.)

And the characters!!! I mean, this novel has multiple universes/timelines, a side trip to the Underworld AND the demon realm, a plot more twisted than a store’s worth of pretzels and yet the thing that hits me the most are the characters. Mo Ran is my favorite web novel character of all time and I love Chu Wanning so. All the secondary characters are wonderfully written (and some of them made me bawl) and they are all complex. My opinion of all of them changed many times over; the novel doesn’t make it easy to love some of them but then you do and it’s so worthwhile! That slow change is one of the delights of the novel - I started out disliking the unpleasant, superior Chu Wanning and cruel, callow Mo Ran and then I loved them so so hard and cried for them so so hard and was in awe of their heroism and sacrifice and selflessness and capacity to love.

Oh, and the fact that this novel does something almost impossible - it has its protagonist start out as so clearly irredeemable and then slowly and painfully and thoroughly redeems him (without ever letting the reader forget what it is he needs redemption for.) Also, for a novel that made me cry so hard I felt ill, this book is just so damn funny with the most sarcastic sense of humor imaginable (the serious angst doesn’t even kick in until 90+ chapters!) Anyway I should stop or I will write a dissertation. But this is the one web novel that I would put in my top 5 not just web novels but any novels in any shape or form. The plentiful trigger warnings are there for a reason so stay away if they are an issue, but if not, if anyone hasn’t read it yet, what are you doing with your life?!

#asks #cnovel #i stole some of those write ups from my earlier posts or i'd be writing until 2025

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fleet-off · 9 months ago

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Because it’s come up with both @lu-sn lu and @theflowergirl Lily now, and because my dentist just sent another form letter expressing deep concern for my oral hygiene should I not schedule my biannual teeth cleaning posthaste, have some wacky fic idea-adjacent nonsense:

Vegas does Pete’s dental cleanings for him.

Pete did not particularly go to the dentist before he got the job with the main family, but the main family keeps one on retainer, and Pete hated going to see him. He found it horribly exposing to hold his mouth open like that, and he really did not like how much he wanted to bite down on the dentist’s fingers. He put up with it, because that’s what Petes do, but he always dreaded it.

Neither of them much likes medical professionals at all, actually, but Vegas sees to his own teeth pretty religiously. (He has to, he’s had veneers since he was eighteen. A smooth, even smile can work wonders.)

Vegas likes Pete’s teeth. He likes Pete’s smile, and Pete’s bite, and the specific way Pete chews his food. He wants Pete’s teeth healthy for as long as possible.

At the same time, Pete shouldn’t have to be uncomfortable except in those carefully orchestrated ways Vegas makes him uncomfortable, which are generally to their mutual benefit.

Vegas would not enjoy watching a dentist clean inside Pete’s mouth. (Pete would let him stay in the room, right?) The inside of Pete’s mouth is a sacred sort of place.

…Anyway, Vegas would be very jealous of the scraper tool.

Vegas does know teeth. He’s yanked a lot of them, albeit not for the benefit of the victims’ oral hygiene.

Why shouldn’t he clean Pete’s teeth himself?

note: doing dental work without proper training is a bad idea, but has that ever stopped VegasPete?

also here comes a readmore for non-explicit dentistry-adjacent kink Whoops

The dental mirror arrives in the mail first, and Vegas coaxes Pete into a practice inspection at the kitchen table that very evening. He realizes at once that they’ll need brighter light and a reclining chair—but though the inside of Pete’s mouth is dimly lit, and though his breath persistently fogs the mirror until Vegas thinks to warm it on the inside of his cheek, this first foray is enough to spark a thousand dark ideas in Vegas’s mind.

There is something to seeing the backs of Pete’s teeth—inspecting what is literally hidden behind his smile.

A vulnerability in the pink semicircles of his gums, maybe. The perfect fit of the teeth penetrating that clinging tissue.

And:

Pete’s jaw stretched wide.

The damp heat of his open mouth against Vegas’s fingers, perfectly exposed and made to stay open.

His tongue twitching like its own creature when Vegas presses it down with a gloved finger.

The slow build-up of saliva—throat muscles working to hold down his gag reflex before Vegas taps his chin and lets him swallow.

Pete’s eyes have dilated; sweat shines on his brow, and the mirror begins to fog worse with every warm-shallow breath.

The next time Vegas caresses the tops of his teeth, Pete bites down hard on his fingers.

…They abandon the mirror for other, more familiar pleasures.

Vegas buys a headlamp and a dental loupe online later that night.

To his credit, he does research teeth cleanings at this point. It’s not the equivalent to years of practice and training, but it’s something.

Then the curettes arrive with their fine metal handles and delicately angled hooks on either end; then the sickle-shaped scaler. Vegas has never held either, but they feel familiar in his hands. He’s always had a knack for instruments.

Pete looks at them in his focused grip and shivers.

His hate for dental cleanings may not be such a problem after all.

(Of course, all of this culminates in Macau walking in on them mid-cleaning in the kitchen. Vegas and Pete are actually pretty good about not doing literal sex things where Macau might see. However, many typically non-sexy things have a way of becoming weird sex things when Vegas and Pete do them.

Macau doesn’t know how this is a weird sex thing, but he knows it is.

Unfortunately, he doesn’t quite manage to nope back out before overhearing just how nice Pete’s gums are.)

#kinnporsche #vegaspete #medical #dentistry #and you know i think this counts as #fanfiction

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queendollophead-ao3 · 10 months ago

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(feel like a middle schooler passing along some chain mail) Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love❤

Ooooooo it's so tricky to decide! Well, in no particular order:

Thirst - Bato/Hakoda/Zuko

“Hakoda, can I… buy you a drink?” “Actually,” a deeper, rumbling voice says from behind him. “I’ve got it covered.” “Zuko,” Hakoda says. “This is my husband, Bato.”

A Rose for the Thorn in My Side - Sokka/Zuko (background Suki/Yue)

Suki is the first Bachelorette to have both men and women on her season. It’s down to her final three– Sokka, Yue, and Zuko. The simmering rivalry between Sokka and Zuko comes to a head in this episode as Suki navigates Fantasy Suite week, knowing a proposal could be around the corner.

Designated Driver - Lu Ten/Sokka

‘Sleep with your best friend’s cousin’ isn’t typically on the Good Designated Driver checklist, but Sokka should probably go ahead and check that off anyways. Better safe than sorry.

Rain Check - Sokka/Zuko

Five times Sokka and Zuko almost meet, and the time they finally do.

Taking on Water - Sokka/Zuko

Zuko can’t take it anymore, he’s been hurting for too long. He has to tell Sokka, even if Zuko’s beyond help.

#atla fanfic #zukka fic recs #zuko #zukka #atla #piandao #atla fic #sokka #atla smut #ask meme

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lubluues · 2 years ago

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Congrats on winning against Drift King

You won the title and adoption papers

Good luck on your next challenge

ADOPTION PAPERS??! oh hell no chat stay the hell away from me i cannot give you anything to eat let alone myself

#rtgame #stares at you autistically. do you honestly think I look like I can do anything for myself #we will just be having French toast sorry it’s the only thing I can make #lu got mail #💬 hey lu shut up

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henessy · 2 years ago

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Re de metida pero no puedo creer la cantidad de gente argentina que estudia traduccion que encontre en tumblr

ay sabés que me parece que no conozco a NADIE acá que estudie traducción???? mejor igual porque pánico de encontrarme con alguien que me conozca jajsksj

#makes sense to me igual!! something about los estudiantes de traducción que grita tumblr user #en mi facu al menos. abundamos los nerds y los trolos #lu got mail

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skyward-floored · 1 year ago

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Whumptober Day 9: Polaroid (“you’re a liar”)

I purposely got off of tumblr and didn’t get sucked into lu update stuff too much because I knew that if I did I would never finish this XD But here’s today’s fic! I love writing Malon :)

Read on ao3

Warnings: kidnapping, some violence, and a broken bone

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“I can’t find my pictobox!”

Time looked up at the complaint, and saw Wind digging through his bag and emptying it into a steadily increasing pile next to him. The others were packing up their gear to in preparation to move, and more than one exasperated face was thrown towards Wind’s mess.

“I wanted a picture of that cool island in the lake, but it’s gone!” Wind huffed as he leaned back, bag now empty. “Who took it?”

“Don’t look at me,” Wild said with his hands up, packing away his cooking supplies. “I don’t need it, I have my own camera.”

“I didn’t either!” Legend defended at Wind’s accusing finger, and the rest of them replied in the negative when Wind looked around at them all.

“We’ll help you look for it sailor,” Warriors said as he joined his side, and they began scouring the campsite.

Time glanced around where he was sitting, but there was no sign of the distinctive red and yellow device, and he shook his head, watching the others search. The camera had to be around here somewhere, Wind had been using it just the night before.

Hopefully it hadn’t been broken.

Time sighed, and prepared to get down on his knees to help search when the sound of footsteps made him look up. He wasn’t the only one who tensed towards his weapon, but it was merely the mailman, stepping through the reeds near their campsite, and they all relaxed.

“I have a letter, for a... Link,” he said with smile, holding it out. Time took it, as he was one of the only Links not crawling around in the rushes, and he smiled at the script.

He recognized Malon’s handwriting instantly, and felt something warm in his chest at the familiar loops. It hadn’t been too long since she’d sent him a letter, but he certainly wasn’t complaining.

“I also found this, does it belong to you?” the mailman asked, and Wind cheered as he saw the red and yellow device.

“My pictobox!” he yelled excitedly, and ran over and took it, studying it for any damage. “All right!”

“Thank you,” Time said politely, and the mailman gave him a surprisingly big grin.

“The pleasure is all mine.”

And then he was gone as unnaturally fast as always, Sky and Twilight both frozen in the act of getting up. They both sit back down with a grumble at their quarry lost (they both had questions about the mail service using unstable dark magic portals), and Time chuckled, grabbing a small knife to tease open the letter.

He had plenty of time to read it after all. Wind still needed to pack everything he owned back into his bag.

The sailor began cajoling Warriors to help him pack all his stuff together again, voice pleading, and Time finally got the seal off the letter, unfolding the paper with a smile.

Then felt his heart stop.

Surrender, and no further harm will come to her.

That was it. Nothing else.

Nine little words in scrawling, angry handwriting that was nothing like Malon’s, and they were enough to make Time feel like he’d been stabbed in the chest.

His heart finally started beating again, but it was going so fast it was like a panicked animal trapped in his chest, and his breathing began to pick up.

No further harm? What had her kidnapper already done to her? How had they known? Was she even—

“Old man? Are you okay?”

Twilight was looking at him in concern, and Time merely stared at him, still frozen in shock.

“Time, you’re as pale as a ghost, what did Malon say? Is she okay?” he repeated, and the rest of the Links looked at him in concern.

Time couldn’t get his mouth to work, and Legend sighed and moved around behind him so he could read the letter as well. He immediately paled, and looked between Time and the paper without saying anything for a moment.

“It’s not from Malon. Someone’s done something to her,” he said finally, and the clearing went dead silent. “It says to surrender, and... she won’t suffer any further harm.”

“Further?” Sky asked in a horrified voice, and they all looked at Time again.

He felt as if he was going to be sick.

“No, no way, it’s a trick. It has to be a trick,” Wild spoke up, voice fierce as he stood. “They’re lying Time, whoever it is has got to be lying, there’s no way Malon could...”

He trailed off, hands clenched into fists, and Twilight approached Time, his face white. He held out a hand, and Time handed him the letter with a grip that was definitely not shaking.

But another paper fluttered out between them as he handed it over, tucked into the envelope. Time snatched it up mere seconds before it touched the ground, and turned it over, staring at the picture in silence.

The mystery of where Wind’s pictobox had gone last night was immediately solved.

The photograph showed Malon in disarray, a look equally angry and frightened in her eyes where she was bound to a chair. Dark Link stood in the foreground, obviously holding the pictobox with one hand while he gestured to Malon with the other, a grin splitting his shadowed face.

There was a dark line of blood on Malon’s cheek.

Time’s numb shock snapped into a wave of pure fury, crashing over him as he stood up. He looked around at the other heroes, clenching the photograph so tightly it nearly ripped in his hands.

“We’re going. Now.”

(...)

Malon’s cheek hurt.

She let out a quiet sigh, the sound muffled by the cloth over her mouth. It was tied tight over her face, and it dug in painfully to the scratch the dark copy of her husband had given her. It stung rather badly, and was still bleeding a bit, and the blood soaking into the gag only made the whole situation that much more unpleasant.

Malon was proud of the reason she’d received the cut though, along with the sting in her knuckles and the handful of bruises she was sporting.

The Shadow of her husband had caught her by surprise, breaking into her house in the dead of night looking nearly identical to Link. Malon had only been fooled for a moment, and she’d done her best to fight him off and escape, managing a few solid punches before he’d overpowered her, and making his nose bleed all over her floor.

Then he’d tied her up, and gagged her when she kept demanding answers from him, bringing her through a shadowy portal like the ones her husband and the other boys had been traveling through.

She’d squirmed and fought and yelled at him the entire time, but he’d either ignored her, or given her a smile that made a shiver run down her spine. And then he’d taken her picture with a strange little device, and stalked away, leaving more then one monster stationed around the perimeter of the room, all watching her closely.

Their gazes made her skin prickle, and she dearly wished she could have a little privacy, or at least not be in the center of the room. She felt like some sort of garish display for people to gawk at, and the looks the monsters were giving her only made the feeling worse.

And truth be told, she was a bit frightened of what exactly Dark Link was planning on doing with her.

She breathed out, calming the panic that had been licking at her heels all night. She didn’t need to worry. Link would be along shortly, and nine heroes were nothing against a second-rate copy.

I hope.

A distant screech caught her attention, and she looked over at the doorway, the shadow of her husband also glancing in its direction. He waved some of the monsters through it, then moved around behind her somewhere where she couldn’t easily see him.

Having him so close but out of sight made her stomach twist.

A much closer shout rang through the doorway, and Malon felt her heart leap as a monster fell dead across the threshold, disappearing into dust. She knew that shout well.

Link entered the room seconds later with his sword already bloodied, the rest of the boys behind him looking equally tense and battle worn.

His gaze immediately sought her own, and a look equally relieved and furious shone in his eye. Malon would’ve tried to give him a reassuring smile, but her mouth was still gagged, and she wasn’t sure she’d be able to dredge up a look that was truly comforting.

“That’s far enough.”

Something cold settled against her neck, and Malon breathed in sharply, a blood-red sword pressed to her skin.

The heroes all froze, staring at her with differing mixtures of fear and outrage on their faces. Dark Link stared at them all, watching to make sure none of them approached, then nodded, looking satisfied.

“Good. Now we can all have a nice, civil chat.”

“Not while you still threaten her,” Link said sharply, and Malon could hear how desperately he was holding back the emotion in his voice.

Oh fairy boy.

The other boys loudly agreed with him, and Dark Link looked around at them all, appearing entirely unbothered.

“I am dictating the terms here,” he replied smoothly, and looked at Malon with a smile that normally made her heart soar. “After all, I do seem to hold all of the cards.”

Malon fixed her husband’s shadow with the most intense glare she could manage, wishing her mouth was free to tell him just what she thought of him. He had the audacity to laugh at her though, and something almost possessive shone in his eyes as she glared. The sword at her neck eased just a little, and he leaned closer to her, practically nose-to-nose.

His breath even smelled like Link’s, and Malon froze, suddenly terrified of what he was going to do.

“I see why you married her, she’s got spirit, this one,” Dark Link purred, holding her chin in an almost terrifyingly gentle grip. His fingers felt like ice. “She’s quite the catch.”

“Release her,” Link nearly snarled, and surprisingly enough the Shadow obeyed, his fingers slipping off her face. The sword never left her neck though, and Malon forced herself not to shake as it teased her skin again.

“I made my demands abundantly clear, Hero of Time, and I think they’re quite reasonable,” Dark Link said, sliding his blade just enough to make pain trickle across Malon’s neck. “Surrender, and no further harm will come to her.”

“What proof do we have that you’ll stick with it?” Twilight interjected, his face just as dark as her Link’s.

“Yeah, we have no guarantee!” Wind shouted, and the others joined in, “why should we do anything you say?!”

Dark Link smiled.

“Because you have no choice.”

He abruptly twisted around and grabbed Malon’s arm, the ropes at her wrists cut off with his sword. Before she could even register what was happening, he twisted to the side, and a horrible crack echoed through the room.

Malon couldn’t hold back her scream.

Pain burst up her arm and shoulder, white sparking in her vision, and there was a sudden rush of noise from where the Heroes were standing, shouts and cries of outrage, and questions of if she was okay.

But Malon couldn’t focus on anything at the moment, just the pain blazing up her arm. She knew immediately something was broken, possibly in more then one place, but before she could even try to ease the pain or calm herself down, something twisted her arm around and it got even worse.

She couldn’t stop herself from crying out again as Dark Link replaced the ropes around her wrists, roughly pulling her arms behind her back. Tears trickled out of her eyes and dampened the gag, and every breath was more painful then the last.

The sound of a weapon clattering to the ground pulled her out of the worst of the pain clouding her mind, and she looked up, meeting Link’s eyes through her tears.

“I surrender!” he shouted, staring at her in horror. His sword was on the ground, and he raised his hands up, turning a glare on Dark Link that was filled with such hatred Malon was surprised he didn’t burn up on the spot.

“I surrender. Let her go.”

“I’m glad we came to an understanding,” Dark Link smiled, ignoring the glare, “very noble of you. But I didn’t mean just you, Hero of Time. I want all of your complete surrenders in exchange for her safety.”

Link’s eyes flashed, but he looked behind him at where the others stood, watching him hesitantly. A few moments of silence went by, and Malon felt a hand curl its fingers around her unbroken arm.

“Do I need to make myself more clear?”

“No,” Sky replied quickly, and the other heroes dropped their weapons, looking just as angry and worried as Malon’s own Link did.

Dark Link removed his hand from her shoulder, and Malon couldn’t stifle a shudder, her heart sinking as she watched the last of the heroes place their weapons on the floor. Boys no, don’t let him use me against you!

“Good... now we’re getting somewhere,” Dark Link grinned, looking pleased as pudding. “I want your bags on the floor too, and any magical items you might be wearing. All nine of you will soon—”

He stopped suddenly, red eyes narrowing as they trailed along the heroes.

“We seem to be missing someone,” Dark Link said in a low voice, and the heroes went still. “Where is the First of the Downfall? The one you call Hero of Legend?”

The room went silent, apart from an unsteady breath from Malon.

Then there was a quiet swish of a cape, and the Hero of Legend suddenly appeared out of nothing, charging at Dark Link with his sword high and eyes blazing with torchlight.

He threw himself at the shadow, and Dark Link was forced to hold his sword up to defend himself, removing it from Malon’s neck. The room erupted into chaos as their blades clashed, and the heroes quickly grabbed their weapons. They leapt forward, the monsters around the perimeter running to stop them, and screeches and yelling echoed all over the room.

And Malon couldn’t do anything but watch it happen, her arm still burning white hot with pain.

She watched Legend narrowly dodge a strike that would have killed him, and looked down at herself, shoulder aching as she tilted her head. Wriggling loose of her ropes wasn’t even a possibility now that she had an opportunity to, her arm entirely uncooperative, and frustration broke through her pain.

Malon looked down at her arm, nausea twisting in her stomach at the angle it was at.

I have to try.

She experimentally wiggled her good arm, trying to see if she could at least loosen the ropes. But pain ripped through the broken one with even that tiny movement, and she gasped, closing her eyes as she fought back more tears of pain.

Okay. Okay, wait a bit, then try again.

You have to get out of here.

As if summoned by her thoughts, something suddenly pulled at the ropes on her feet, and Malon dizzily looked down, trying to focus on who was helping her. All she could make out was blond hair though, bent over her ankles. A different set of hands was at her back, pulling off her gag and ever-so-gently removing the ropes at her wrists.

Her breath hitched with pain when the hands accidentally nudged her arm, and there was an apology in her ear, then a rustle as the ropes fell to the ground.

A hand very carefully shifted her arm to a better position, and Malon squeezed her eyes shut, trying not shout at the pain. But once it was let go, Malon could actually focus a little better now that the ropes weren’t twisting it around. It still hurt, rather badly, but not quite to the extent it had.

She looked up at who had freed her, and saw Twilight standing next to Four and Sky, the two keeping a sharp eye on the fight around them while Twilight looked her over with no small alarm.

“Malon, are you okay?” he asked, the worry on his face only growing as he studied her arm. “...never mind, that’s a stupid question. How bad is your arm?”

“It’ll be okay,” she replied, voice mostly not shaking, and squeezed Twilight’s hand with her good one. “Thank you, hon.”

Twilight helped her up, ears pricked for any monsters that might approach, and Malon rubbed at her cheeks, sore from how tight the gag had been. Her stomach twisted when she felt something move in her arm, and she held a little tighter to Twilight’s arm as the pain spiked.

“I’m sorry, I’d offer you a potion, but we’ll have to set your arm first,” Twilight apologized, looking a little frantic as she forced herself to keep her breathing steady through the pain. Easy does it Malon. “And that’ll have to wait until we’re somewhere safe.”

She nodded, not trusting her voice, and Twilight began to lead her away from the worst of the fighting.

Four stayed nearby, giving her an encouraging look before returning his gaze to the fight around them. Sky stayed a bit further away, but he didn’t go far, and they both acted as a sort of guard as Twilight led her across the room. Her world narrowed to mostly Twilight’s arm supporting her as they walked, and the pain that only seemed to get worse in her arm.

She couldn’t entirely bite back a gasp when it abruptly spiked, and swallowed back her nausea as Twilight gently squeezed her hand.

They’d stopped walking at some point, she wasn’t sure when. She was afraid to raise her head and check if they’d left the room or not, worried the nausea she felt in the back of her throat would win and she’d end up making even more of a mess of herself. Talking was going on around her, possibly directed at her, but she couldn’t focus on any of it, just the pain that wouldn’t go away in her arm.

Then a voice cut through the fog she’d been drifting through, sharp and frantic.

“Malon!”

She raised her head, and suddenly Link was holding her, pressing her into his arms, murmuring frantic apologies and assurances as she buried her head in his shoulder and allowed herself a couple more tears.

Relief swept through Malon as Link held her, carefully not touching her arm, running trembling fingers through her hair. She could hear his heart thumping rapidly where her ear was pressed to his neck, and she merely listened to it for a moment as he held her, warm and safe.

Link finally pulled back enough to properly look at her face, and his thumb gently caressed her cheek, right next to the cut Dark Link had given her.

“Are you okay?” he asked, his eyes still shining with fear.

“I think I should be asking you that,” she said with a teasing smile, but her voice shook, and Link’s face creased further. He carefully ran a hand over her arm and shoulder, Malon flinching at the pain that shot up her arm at his touch, and he winced and apologized.

Someone said something over his shoulder, and Link looked back and replied, though Malon didn’t catch everything that was said.

“...Is Legend okay?” she asked suddenly, remembering how he’d leapt at the Shadow.

“He’s fine. Dark Link got away, but he’ll think twice before coming after you again,” Twilight said with a smile, and Malon blinked. She hadn’t realized he was still nearby.

“I gave him something to remember me by, that’s for sure,” Legend’s voice said from somewhere nearby. His tone was satisfied, but it held something dangerous in it.

Link’s arms went around her more tightly again, and Malon looked up at him, a storm of all sorts of emotions on his face. He caught her looking, and gave her a slightly brittle smile.

“I’m okay,” she reassured gently, and he pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.

“I’ve done that to you enough to know you’re absolutely not telling the truth,” he replied, but his smile was a little more genuine then before. “We’ll get you healed as soon as we’re able, Malon.”

Malon nodded, and ignored how her arm still hurt like it was being trampled on, and how her stomach still twisted with nausea, merely setting her chin on Link’s shoulder again.

“Thank you fairy boy,” she said softly, and Link held her as tight as he could without hurting her arm. “I wish I could have stopped him.”

Link let out a trembling sigh.

“I’m just relieved you’re okay.”

#I was going to make Polaroid work for this fic if it killed me lol #linkeduniverse #linked universe #lu time #lu Malon #lu malink #lu twilight #linked universe fanfic #whumptober #whumptober 2023 #day 9 #you’re a liar #writing from the floor

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calumsrockstar · 1 year ago

Text

Bare - Poly 5SOS

a/n: I saw this album cover and had this idea...

Contents: smut (exhibitionism mostly)

Word count: 1.1k

In which the reader is a band mate and agrees to do the rolling stone cover photo.

5sos x bandmate!reader

Luke was working on his computer, while Calum, Mike and Ash were sitting next to him. "What the fuck?" He said to himself. Calum laughed, "What happened Lu?" He asked. "You guys gotta see this man." Luke laughed.

What was on the screen was an e-mail from the Rolling Stone magazine asking if they were interested in doing a naked photoshoot, nothing too explicit, they would be covering their genitals, and they would have writing all over their body.

Ashton started giggling loudly. "Well, that´s punk rock dude!" Luke paused. "Wait, are you actually considering doing this photo shoot?" He asked raising an eyebrow. "Well, it would be good for publicity, and also, we wouldn´t actually show anything, and it´s the Rolling Stone!" He uttered.

Mike paused for a few seconds. "Well, we would have to talk about this to y/n." Luke looked at him. "Yeah, i didn´t think about her...how would she even do that?"

"Well, she could wear underwear and just cover her tits? We would be wearing dick covers too, wouldn´t we?" Calum said. Luke started blushing. All of the boys had been having thoughts about her, but they had never admitted it.

"Well.... who´s gonna tell her?" Michael said. He, Calum and Ashton said "not it!" at the same time, which left Luke being the responsible one.

"You guys are such assholes." Luke muttred under his breath. All of the boys started laughing.

You were in your room listening to music. Luke knocked at the door while the other boys were listening in.

"Come in!" You said to Luke. "Hey y/n, I was just wondering if I could talk to you about something." Luke said quietly. "Yeah, what do you need?" You asked curiously.

"So... There´s this photoshoot we got asked to do." Luke told you. "That´s amazing Lu! How will it be?" Luke paused. "Okay so basically we gotta be naked." You raised an eyebrow. "It´s nothing too explicit, we´re gonna be covering our stuff with our hands." Luke asserted. You started laughing, and Luke rubbed the back of his neck with his hand.

"Wow, you´re not kidding." You said, smiling. "Yeah, if you´re not comfortable it´s totally okay, you don´t need to do it." He cooed.

"I want to do it." You said sternly. His jaw dropped. "Really?" You laughed. "Yeah, it´s gonna be good for publicity, and well, it´s not gonna be that explicit." You said, winking.

He stopped and started thinking about how your body looked like naked, he´s seen you before after a shower with your tight pijamas, but nothing too lewd.

His jeans were starting to get tighter around his crotch, he needed to get those thoughts out of his head now. "Lu? You there?" You asked. "Yeah! Yeah! I´ll tell the boys!" He exclaimed while leaving the room. You chuckled to yourself.

"Guys, you won´t believe this, she said yes." Luke said quietly to everyone. All their jaws dropped. "Oh my God" Ashton muttered.

The next day came, and you were all getting ready for the photoshoot. "This is so weird man, never thought I would be naked in a room with all of you." Calum said. Everyone laughed. The boys felt a pit in their stomach, knowing you could come out at any time.

You were in your dressing room. You had black lace panties on, doing your makeup and you were completely topless. What you didn´t know, was that your door was half open.

Calum saw the open door with the side of his eye. You looked amazing, your hair was curled and your body looked like it was sculpted by gods.

The other boys were quick to notice too. They all looked at each other. "Dude..." Michael uttered quietly. "Are we gonna ignore the elephant in the room?" Ashton said. "She´s so fucking hot." Calum said.

"I don´t think I can do this anymore." Luke said. Ashton started giggling. "Why? Did the blood go to the wrong place Lu?"

What they didn´t know, is that you were enjoying this as much as they did. This was your fantasy. A room with 4 naked men, that you´ve had a crush on forever? Sounds like a great plan.

Every boy there was mesmerized, all of them had imagined you naked before, but this was even better than anything their imagination could create.

You opened the door. The four boys immediately looked the other way. "Come on guys, we´re all adults here." You said, while smiling. Michael coughed awkwardly. "Let´s do this." Calum said.

The photographer had specific requestes. You had to take a photo next to each one of the boys. "Be sexy and bold!" The photographer exclaimed.

The boys could not ignore their growing erections, it was getting uncomfortable to all of them. They could only hope it would be over soon so they could go to their rooms and stroke their cocks thinking of you. You on the other hand, were loving this.

In the first picture, you were in the middle of Calum and Luke, both standing awkwardly. You posed for the picture. "Luke, put your arm around y/n." The photographer said. Luke coughed. It was getting hard enough to cover his boner with one hand. He put his hand on your waist.

The sensation was amazing, you were wet immediately.

"Now y/n, go next to Ashton and do a kiss on his cheek." The photographer exclaimed. You were happy to do what you were told, covering your tits, you placed a soft kiss on Ashton´s cheek. He started blushing.

Now, it was your turn to go to Calum´s side. "y/n, stick your toungue out." You did as told. "That´s amazing, the fans will love it." Calum looked at you while the photographer took the picture. Calum´s mind was racing thinking of what you could do with that toungue. "Calum, look at the camera, not at her." The photographer said sternly. Michael laughed.

In the last photo, the photographer told Michael to stand behind you, and for you to make a surprised expression on your face. While he was behind you, you adjusted yourself in front of him, wiggling your ass around on his cock.

You could feel his dick close to your body, you smirked, then the final picture was taken.

"We´re all done here!" The photographer said, with a smile on his face. All the boys sighed.

"Good work guys." You said, smirking, and returned to your dressing room, closing the door.

The guys were in silence looking at each other for a few seconds. "I really need to go to the bathroom." Luke said. The boys laughed. Ashton looked at him. "Touché."

#5 seconds of summer #5sos smut #calum hood #michael clifford #luke hemmings #ashton irwin #ashton irwin smut #michael clifford smut #calum hood smut #luke hemmings smut

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