#lovetheships

[deansdirtylittlesecretsblog]

It’s What I Do

Title:  It’s What I Do

Summary:  Dean and Donna go out. Dean gets jealous and acts like an ass, Donna gets pissed.

Author:  Dean’s Dirty Little Secret

Characters:  Dean Winchester x Donna Hanscum

Word Count:  915

Warnings:  arguing, Dean pissing Donna off, implied smut

Author’s Notes:  This was written for @waywardjoy Love the Ships Challenge. My pairing was Dean and Donna and my prompt was “If you were going to make an ass of yourself— “When don’t I make an ass of myself over you?”

The door slamming behind Donna made him cringe, reverberating through his already pounding head. He threw himself on the couch face first, his head resting on a huge, fluffy throw pillow. He could her Donna stomping around the house, hear her muttering under her breath. She was pissed, pissed at him. She had every right to be.

He’d made a fool of himself and embarrassed her, jumping in when some drunk guy in the bar had gotten a little too handsy with her. He’d shoved him, gotten in his face, acted like a stupid ass. Donna had stormed out of the bar and sat in the Impala without uttering a word. The silence had continued all the way back to her house. He’d never seen her this angry. Not at him anyway.

Dean waited, wondering how long it would be before she let loose on him. He didn’t have to wait long.

“What exactly were you thinking, Dean?” She sat in the chair across from him, her arms crossed, her foot tap, tap, tapping on the floor. “Were you trying to turn the night into a 10-10?”

He wanted to pull the pillow over his head, feign sleep, but that would only make the situation worse. So he pushed himself upright, and leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, hands clasped between them.

“No, that’s not what I was trying to do,” he shrugged. “I didn’t like the way that guy was looking at you, the things he was saying to you. I didn’t trust him.”

“I can take care of myself, Dean,” she snapped. “Besides, he was harmless.”

“You don’t know that -”

“And you don’t know that he wasn’t.” Donna pushed herself to her feet, pacing back and forth in front of the coffee table. “You can’t protect me from every Tom, Dick, and Harry you think might be a threat.”

“But, Donna -”

“Don’t ‘but, Donna’ me!” She swung around, her finger in Dean’s face. “You made me look like a fool. He was flirting with me, Dean, that was all. I mean, if you were going to make an ass of yourself -”

“When don’t I make an ass of myself over you?” Dean interrupted, pushing himself to his feet. “I don’t think straight when I’m around you, Donna. I do stupid shit, I make stupid mistakes. I act like an ass. It’s what I do.”

“That’s a shitty excuse,” Donna shook her head.

“I’m not saying it’s a good excuse,” he replied. “But it’s the only one I got.” He stepped around the coffee table and caught Donna’s arm, stopping her mid-stride. “Donna? Come on, just, don’t be mad at me, okay?”

She yanked her arm free and fell to the couch, her head in her hands. Dean sat gingerly beside her, close, though he didn’t touch her. “Donna? Talk to me.”

“You can’t do that to me, treat me like that,” she mumbled. “I can take care of myself.” She fell back against the couch with a sigh. “I’m not in this with you so you can...I don’t know, babysit me, hover over me like a damn helicopter parent or somethin’. I’m with you because I love you, Dean. But that ain’t gonna work if you don’t treat me like an equal.”

“I worry -” Dean sputtered.

“I know,” Donna smiled, though it seemed strained. “And I get it. The djinn, that demon in Wyoming, vampires, werewolves, and a million other things. I understand. But don’tcha think I worry about you?”

“That’s different,” Dean shook his head. “I can take care of myself.” He heard the words as soon as they were out of his mouth and he instantly regretted them. “I’m not, I mean… Fuck.” He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. “Look, all I can promise is that I’ll try. That’s all I can do. Try.”

Donna reached out and curled her fingers around his. “I’ll take it,” she whispered, squeezing his hand. “Now get over here and kiss me so we can make up.”

Dean chuckled and leaned over Donna, sliding his arm around her and crushing her to his chest. His lips found hers, their kiss slow and easy.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured.

“Why don’t you just admit you were jealous?” Donna smiled against his mouth.

He laughed, tightening his hold on her, burying his nose against the side of her neck, inhaling her vanilla and strawberry scent. He’d been unbelievably jealous; the sight of another man that close to Donna, putting his hands on her, it had set him off.

“I was jealous,” he growled, his voice muffled, her hair tickling his cheeks.

“Yeah, I knew it,” Donna laughed. “You don’t have to be. Ever.” She scratched her fingers against his scalp, pulling him closer, her mouth against his ear. “I’m all yours, Dean. All yours.”

He rolled her to her back, pushing his thigh between legs, her hips wiggling against his as they got comfortable. Dean kissed her, taking his time, even though he wanted to devour her, every inch of her. His hands moved over her body, caressing her curves, reveling in the way she was undulating against him. He slipped her shirt over her head, his lips trailing after it, licking, nibbling, sucking. He was aching for her.

“Donna,” he growled.

She wrapped her arms around him and circled her hips. “Take me to bed Winchester,” she murmured. “Show me how sorry you really are.”

“You got it, gorgeous,” Dean smirked.

Dean and Donna Tags:  @mamapeterson @aprofoundbondwithdean @sweetmisseddreams2002 @katnharper @ultimatecin73 @thebunkerismyhome @deathswaywardson @chrisatplay @geekylibrarian24 @jessica-bones-winchester @winchesterswoonathon @for-the-love-of-dean @tonifish @nichelle-my-belle @torn-and-frayed @ksgeekgirl @missandmrsgalxy @prettyboydean @tia58 @nerdyplantbasednurse @madamelibrarian @icantthinkofaname-oops @bringmesomepie56 @iwriteshortstuff @piratedaydreams @that1seniorchick @starswirlblitz @pizzarollpatrol @lazairahel @hidingfrommychildren @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @district12-erudite @misswhizzy @deansdirtywhore @wonderless-screwup @downworlder--impala @superbluhoo2 @deandoesthingstome @jencharlan @feelmyroarrrr @okay-okay18 @spnbrennafae @rattyretro-blog-blog @ladyroche @climbthatmooselikeatree @rizlow1 @smoothdogsgirl @mischief-maker1 @winchesterprincessbride @just-a-touch-of-sass-and-fandoms @sckslife @sis-tafics @youwerelikeadream @i-dream-of-dean @oriona75 @writingbeautifulmen @meeshw777 @mrswhozeewhatsis @gemini75eeyore @vote-for-pedro @tom-is-in-my-tardis @percywinchester27 @atc74 @chelseafartnoise @missbeccamay @findingfitnessforme @tas898 

[deanxfuckingadorablexwinchester]

Rendezvous with the Past

Characters: Sam x Reader

Summary: What happens when Sam gets back in touch with one if his old college friend?

Word Count:1940

Warning: Angst and fluff.

A/N: This is my entry for @waywardjoy Joy’s 500 followers celebration ; Love the ships. I would like to thank @percywinchester27 for pushing me to write Sam and @thewhiterabbit42 for being my beta! I hope I did justice to the prompt and sam.

PS~ Feedback is always welcome!

“Hi, we are from the Fbi. This is my partner agent Tyler and I am-” Sam started but before he could finish the girl cut him off.

“Sam? What are your doing here?“ she asked, shock written all over her tear stained face. What else could you expect? The girl had thought Sam had died or something along those lines with how he vanished in thin air after what happened to Jess.  Once they were caught they didn’t really have an option but to tell her truth which she refused to believe initially but as the case progressed, Somehow they had managed to convince her what was out there and solved the case by using her as bait.

That was six months ago and they had been in touch every since. They would talk and flirt and talk some more no matter what time of the day it was.  They had a lot of years to catch up on.  Initially, Sam hadn't” been sure about staying in touch but she wouldn’t budge. What he expected was for it to be old friends catching up awkwardly, but it was exactly the opposite.  It was so easy to get back in sync with her and after a point it didn’t feel like they had ever stopped talking.  Sending each other things they would like and he would listen to her vent while she was the shoulder he had started leaning on her once they were back in sync just like before.

 Six months later, he was staring at the screen reading the message over and over.  It was one of his fears that had come true.  He had fallen for her.  Hard.  The thing was he never expected her to be interested in him at all.  It was just playful flirting and didn’t mean anything until the last text she sent.

 [Text : Sammy] : So when are you going to ask me out?

It was so blunt and honest, just like her, that a part of him was amused but all in all, he didn’t know how to reply to it. He liked her alot but given his history he just didn’t want anything to happen to her because of him.  He knew her from college.  They used to study together and then he had vanished without a word and seeing her again was different.  It was different because now he didn’t have any am secrets from her but that was different. Talking and letting her into his life, that would put her at risk.

Dean read over his shoulder wondering what had Sam all quiet.  He couldn’t help but roll his eyes at his brother. 

“You know she is right.  Ask her out.  She ain’t gonna wait for you forever.  We both know she could do a whole lot better but she chose you so go for it,” Dean said as he sat down opposite Sam.

Sam ignored his brother and turned his phone off for a while, which he knew was cowardly.   He didn’t want to leave her hanging, but he also didn’t know what to say.  It’s not like he didn’t wanna be with her, because he did, but everyone him and Dean included in their lives died and he just couldn’t be the reason for her death.  

 Maybe he should just ignore her.  She would be fine just like she was before.  A girl like that could be with anyone.  Anyone and he needed to give her a chance at a normal life, one where she didn’t need to worry about whether the guy she was dating would come back back after work or just die.

 The fact that he had to let go of her again just after he had found her was beyond painful.  It hadn’t hit him that hard when he left college because of how things were, but this time he was already feeling the sting.  They had connected on so many levels and he didn’t think they were this close even when they were in college.

“Just ask her out man!  You have been going on and on about her when you aren’t talking to her, which is almost 24/7, and she knows our dirty little secret. She is smart and beautiful and you are smitten by her even though you don’t admit it,” Dean said shaking his head. “Why won’t you just admit it?” he asked his brother.

 “Because you don’t understand! If I say it out loud that means it’s real. If I keep it in I can pretend that it isn’t happening!” Sam snapped back at her brother.

 “Since when are you that dumb?  It is real.  It is happening and to be honest I haven’t seen you this happy ever before.  Just don’t be stupid enough to let her slip away,“ Dean said quietly but when he didn’t get a reply he decided to give his brother some space.  “I am just going to go to the bar.  Call me if you need anything,“ he muttered as he grabbed his car keys and jacket before heading out.

 It was an hour later and Sam was still sitting in the same place staring at his phone not able to stop himself from thinking about her.  He couldn’t stop imagining his life with her. Waking up next to her everyday, making breakfast for her. Working out together. Just being able to hold her and kiss her. He had been so lost in his thoughts that he jumped a little when he heard the banging on the door knowing it couldn’t be Dean.  It had just been an hour.  No one else knew they were in town.  He grabbed his gun and slowly went to open the door only to freeze at the sight in front of him.

 There she was soaking in rain, standing in front of him and she didn’t look happy.  Not one bit and he swallowed hard.

“So were you ever going to tell me you were in town?” she asked glaring at him as she pushed past him.  “Stop pointing the fucking gun at me.  I am so fucking pissed of at you!  If you didn’t wanna date me you could have just told me so instead of hiding out!  Besides, what are you even doing here!  Why won’t you fucking tell me?  If it wasn’t for Dean, you would have come and gone and I wouldn’t even know!” she exclaimed, suddenly feeling so overwhelmed that she started hitting him.  “I hate you.  I hate you so fucking much!  You know how hard it was for me in college to be around you?  But did I ditch?  Did I ignore you?“ she asked, hitting him again, “I was so fucking madly in love with you but you never saw that!  And today I am standing in the same goddamn situation and the only difference is you know I want you but you don’t fucking care!” she yelled, breathing hard with this pout on her face, and sam was still frozen on his spot.

 “We are here because I wanted to see you,” he said quietly after she calmed down a little and she looked up at him with tears brimming in her eyes.

 “Yeah? Why did you want to see me when you don’t care enough even to reply to a goddamn text?“ she whispered as tears fell down her face and she turned away from him.

 He walked over to her and turned her gently to look at him even though she tried to stop him. “I didn’t reply because I was scared, because I wanted to say yes and I know it’s not the right thing to do,” he whispered and she finally looked up at him

 “Then why didn’t you?” she asked, sniffing a little as more tears fell down her face.  Once she started she just couldn’t stop herself.

 Sam let out a sigh running a hand down his face in frustration not knowing how to explain it to her.  “Y/N, knowing about our world and living in it are two different things.  I can’t do that to you.  I can’t drag you into my life and ask you to give up yours?  I just didn’t know how to reply because I didn’t want to lie but if I said the truth then I would be asking too much of you,” he  explained, wiping her tears away. “Do you even realise how dangerous it will be for you. If someone finds out about us they won’t hesitate to hurt you. To use to get to me and trust me that’s something neither you or I want. I just wanna keep you safe but if I say yes I would he doing exactly the opposite.”

 “But you aren’t asking me anything,” she said cupping his face and standing up on tiptoes to press a soft kiss on his lips.  “I am doing it because I want to, because I want you and the fact that I love you isn’t gonna change even if you decide not to be with me.  It’s just going to make us miserable.  Just please Sam?  I want to be with you.  I am past the point of going back to my old life.  I lost you once to Jess and I can’t lose you again.  Please?” she asked, her voice trembling a little as she looked up at him.  When he didn’t say anything, she pulled away, this time not bothering to hide her tears. “You think i am dumb? I know the risks. I know everything but I still wanna be with you.” she said waiting for him to say something but he didn’t.

 “Well, this is goodbye then.  I can’t talk to you anymore. You made your choice and I made mine,” she mumbled as she turned to leave.

 The moment she said they couldn’t talk anymore something clicked inside him.  Before he could even think, he was grabbing her by the wrist, pulling her to him,  crushing his lips to hers in a deep kiss and it was like a weight was lifted of off him.  “So know any place here where we can go and eat?” he asked with a small grin and she was looking at him with a matching smile.

 “How about you lend me something dry to wear and then we can go and eat,” she said, suddenly feeling cold now that the adrenaline had subsided.

 “Oh, yeah.  Sorry, hang on,” he muttered, but before he could move she was grabbing him by the collar and pulling him in for another kiss. “Don’t you dare leave. This was my choice. Just remember that. I would ask Dean to hunt you down if you vanish on me.”she threatened him with a smile on her face before pecking his lips.

 “Or we could always order in and cuddle up watching some Netflix?“ she suggested with a coy smile as she pulled his shirt on and buttoned it up.  he couldn’t help but laugh before he pulled her close and pressed another kiss to her lips.. “Netflix and chill does sound good.” he agreed

 “I still hate you,” she murmured against him.

Tags~ 

@girl-next-door-writes @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @percywinchester27 @sis-tafics @dancing-the-hellfire-rumba @but-deans-back-tho @doro7winchester @emilywritesaboutdean @forests-heart @impala-dreamer @dreamingintheimpalawithdean @like-a-bag-of-potatoes @demondean-for-kingofhell @captainemwinchester @chaos-and-the-calm67 @isabellaxcruz-rp @thewhiterabbit42 @paigeinastory @sea040561

[d-s-winchester]

Can’t Help Falling in Love

(gif made by me)

Prompt: “I’m trying to decide if this thing I did is incredibly stupid or…”     “What happened? What did you do?”    “Well…I fell in love with you.” Pairing: Nicsen (aka Nicole x Jensen) Word Count: 1,143 Warnings: None? A/N: Here’s my entry for @waywardjoy‘s Love the Ships challenge! Hope you guys like it! Anyway, feedback for this is awesome! :)

Nicole was nervous. It wasn’t the prospect of spending time with Jensen that had her feeling that way it was the fact that she would be spending time with him alone. Ever since the first time she’d met him, not long after Ashley and Misha started dating, she’d been attracted to him. She couldn’t blame herself for that one either, he was quite possibly the most attractive man she’d ever laid eyes on. Every time they crossed paths, though, their friends had been present – and with Ashley and Misha’s wedding right around the corner, they found themselves spending even more time together fulfilling their respective best man and maid of honor duties.

 Nicole took a deep breath and walked through the doors of the coffee shop they’d agreed to meet at and scanned the room for him. She spotted him with ease and headed over to the table he was seated at. She was surprised to see that he’d already ordered her a coffee. With a smile and a thank you she hung her bag on the arm of the chair and sat down across from him.

 “Has he given you any ideas?” she asked, taking a sip of her coffee.

 “No,” Jensen replied, shaking his head, “has Ash?”

 “She picked a restaurant and has established an absolutely no strippers rule,” Nicole chuckled.

 “Misha warned me that would probably happen.”

 “Why do I feel like this was easier if the bachelor and bachelorette parties were going to be separate?”

 “Because it would be,” Jensen pointed out, “but it’s not that bad, the dinner is combined and it’s at the same casino, not our fault they both decided it would be fun to spend a weekend gambling.”

 “That’s true,” Nicole nodded, taking another sip of her coffee, “we should probably get to planning then. I’ll book everything since you’re not very tech savvy.”

 Nicole smirked at him and he feigned offense, glaring at her while she pulled out her laptop. They spent the next few hours joking around and ironing out all of the party details. By the time they’d each finished a second cup of coffee the hotel rooms were booked, the dinner reservations were made and everything else was in place. Nicole packed up her laptop, thanked Jensen again for the coffee, and promised him she would be seeing him soon before leaving the coffee shop. As she made her way out to her car she found herself wishing that they hadn’t finalized everything that day, it would have at least given her another chance to spend some more alone time with him.  

 Over the next few months, as the wedding approached, both Nicole and Jensen spent more time together – even going as far as making up wedding related things that would force them to spend time alone. Neither of them wanted to admit it but they were falling for each other – hard. By the time the wedding day rolled around they were both starting to regret never admitting their feelings for each other, knowing that once this day was over they would be seeing each other much less frequently.

 The thoughts about her own feelings and love life didn’t stop Nicole from smiling broadly from her seat next to Jensen as she watched her best friend dance with her new husband for the first time. As she watched and waited for the DJ to invite the rest of the bridal party to the floor she barely registered Jensen staring at her. She glanced over at him, ready to say something, when the DJ made his announcement.

 Jensen offered his hand to Nicole and she accepted, standing from her chair, letting him lead her out to the dance floor. She couldn’t help the butterflies in her stomach or the blush creeping up her cheeks as Jensen placed his hand on her waist and pulled her just a little bit closer. They moved to the music, not saying much of anything, until Nicole noticed the same pensive look on Jensen’s face that he had at the table.

 “Everything ok?”

 “Yeah,” he answered, clearing his throat, “It’s just that I’m trying to decide if this thing I did is incredibly stupid or…”

 “What happened?” Nicole asked, immediately starting to panic that he’d done something that would screw up the reception somehow, “What did you do?”

 He let out a chuckle, looked at her and gave her a shy smile.

 “Well…” he said taking a deep breath, “I fell in love with you.”

 The song ended and the music stopped while Nicole stood there, rooted to the spot, looking at him in disbelief. Everyone around them was clapping and starting to move back to their seats and it didn’t seem like Nicole was making any effort to move. Jensen started leading her toward the balcony off the back of the reception hall when Ashley noticed the look on her friend’s face.

 She raised an eyebrow at Jensen who gave her a reassuring smile as he ushered Nicole out of the French doors, onto the balcony, away from all the noise. The cool October night air seemed to bring her back to reality and she stared at him. It seemed like she was finally registering what he’d said and Jensen was more than worried that he’d made a mistake in admitting his feelings for her, even though he was so sure she’d felt the same.

 Nicole was shocked, she couldn’t believe he felt the same way, but it was almost too much for her to handle. She knew she should say something to him, let him know that she loved him too, but she couldn’t find the words. Deciding to throw caution to the wind she closed the gap between them and grabbed his face as she pushed herself up on her tiptoes. She pressed her lips against his and when he kissed her back she let her arms drop around his neck as his arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer.

 “You had me worried there for a minute,” Jensen smiled when they broke apart.

 “Sorry,” Nicole chuckled and leaned in to kiss him again.

 She pulled away from him abruptly, however, when she heard the DJ announce that it was time for the maid of honor’s speech.

 “Think they’ll be mad?” she asked as he followed her back into the building.

 Jensen didn’t need to answer, the knowing smirk on Ashley’s face answered for him. Giving her friend a small smile Nicole walked over to the DJ and took the microphone, ready to make her speech. As she said the words she’d been rehearsing for weeks she couldn’t help the smile from forming on her lips, not just because she was happy for her friend, but because she was happy at the new direction her life seemed to be going in too.

[impalasutra]

To Have And To Hold

Summary: Dean encounters and picks up Castiel in a hotel bar and smut ensues.

Pairing/Character(s): Destiel

Word Count: 4257

Warnings: Drinking, Cursing, Cas and Dean both seem like kind of terrible people for a little bit, Smut: role play, kissing, teasing, battle for control, blow jobs, unprotected anal sex

A/N: This is for @waywardjoy’s Love The Ships challenge! My prompt was “Are you gay or drunk?” “Probably both.”  So, FYI: Dean and Cas both seem like terrible people for a little bit in this but please stay with me, it all wraps up nicely at the end and I like to think it’s worth the payoff.  

To Have And To Hold - 

Dean surveyed the bar, getting the lay of the land and a handle on the patrons.  He didn’t usually stay in hotels that had their own bars or restaurants attached, especially not one as nice as this.  Tonight was a special night, though, and Dean was celebrating.  His eyes scanned the room again, landing on an attractive man sitting by himself and swirling what looked like a glass of whisky.  Dean began to walk across the bar towards the man but before he could get there, one of the seats next to him was occupied by a pretty blonde woman.  Dean switched his course and sat directly opposite from the man, only looking away long enough to order his own glass of whisky.  

Dean could tell the man wasn’t particularly interested in what the woman was saying and he certainly wasn’t interested in buying her a drink so Dean did the best thing he could think of to get the other man out of his situation: he sent over a drink.  

The bartender dropped off the whisky and the woman reached for it before the bartender politely told her it was for the man she was talking to.  Dean watched as the woman’s face changed from smug to angry in an instant.  She started frantically looking around for the woman who would dare send the man she was targeting a drink, though she had been happy to accept an offer from someone besides the handsome man next to her.  

Dean used the woman’s distraction to catch the man’s eye, wink, and smirk before nodding his head toward the empty seat next to him.  The man smiled back and looked between Dean and the space beside him.  He turned to the woman, briefly speaking to her before he stood from the bar and walked around to where Dean was sitting.

The woman watched him cross around the bar with a look that could only be called indignance.  Dean had a feeling that she didn’t get turned down too often.  When the man sat down next to Dean, she huffed, rolled her eyes, and stalked back to the table she’d been occupying previously.

“She looked pretty scandalized over there,” Dean commented.  “What’d you tell her in order to escape?”

“I just told her that she wasn’t my type,” Castiel replied.

“And, what is your type, sweetheart?” Dean asked lecherously.

“Well,” Castiel began, looking up at Dean through his eyelashes, “not women, to begin with.”  

Dean suppressed a groan as he watched Castiel’s tongue dart out to wet his lips before he pulled his lower lip between his teeth.  He wanted this man.  Badly.

“I’m Dean,” he offered.

“Castiel,” the man replied.  “It’s nice to meet you, Dean.”  Castiel’s eyes drifted to Dean’s lips and Dean was pretty sure the man wanted him just as badly.  

Dean smirked and turned back to his drink, tilting his head back as he finished off the glass.  He could feel Castiel’s eyes on him and Dean had never been more aware of the motion of his muscles as he swallowed.  When his eyes returned to Castiel, the man’s lips were slightly parted and his blue eyes were roaming over Dean’s neck and chest.  

Castiel blushed when he realized Dean was watching him.  He cleared his throat and shifted his attention to his drink, finishing it in one swallow.  Suddenly, Castiel was feeling shy and, as his ring clinked quietly against his glass he realized why.  He’d never done anything quite like this before.  His eyes shot up to Dean’s face but, luckily, the man was sitting to his right and hadn’t noticed his left hand yet.  He could take the ring off, he supposed, but where would be the fun in that?

The two men drank, chatted, and flirted for another half hour or so, Dean slowly invading Castiel’s space.  It started with a conspiratorial shoulder bump after a joke and then graduated to a hand on Castiel’s arm while he was telling Dean about his job.  Well, the job he had made up to get Dean’s hands on him.  He had hoped that Dean would try to subtly check out his muscles when he mentioned he was a personal trainer and Castiel hadn’t been disappointed.  Dean had laid a hand against Castiel’s forearm and had not so stealthily slid it up to squeeze Castiel’s bicep.  

Cas returned the favor, grabbing one of Dean’s hands while the handsome man told a story about a near death experience, or so Dean’s fear addled childhood brain had thought.  Their touches were casual as conversation flowed easily between them.  Castiel called the bartender over to order the next round but Dean, ever the gentleman, insisted on paying and adding Castiel’s bill to his own.  

When the drinks arrived, Dean lifted his in a toast, leaned forward, and placed a hand on Castiel’s thigh.  His hand wasn’t so high that a random passerby would pay any mind but it was certainly placed so that Cas understood Dean’s intention.  

“To new adventures,” Dean declared, tapping the rim of his glass against Castiel’s.

Cas murmured his agreement and they both drank.  He kept his eyes on Dean as the other man turned back to the bar.  Dean had left his hand on Castiel’s thigh, though, and slid it a little higher, even.  He squeezed the man’s thigh, turning and looking over his shoulder, green eyes meeting blue, as Dean wagged his eyebrows seductively and gave Cas a small smile.  

For some reason, the action made Castiel giggle and his left hand flew up to cover his mouth in an effort to stifle his laughter.

Dean’s eyes moved to Castiel’s hand and the smile fell from his face.  Dean was suddenly looking pensive.  Castiel studied Dean’s face for a moment, wondering what had changed the man’s demeanor so quickly.  He dropped his hand from his face and watched as Dean’s gaze followed.

Realizing what had happened, Cas put his drink down and fidgeted with the wedding ring Dean had just noticed.  

“She…” Castiel began, not quite knowing how to finish his sentence.  Shit, he thought, he’d gone too far.  He should have taken the ring off; Dean wasn’t into it.  Shit.  

Castiel pulled together every ounce of bravado and courage he had left in him and spoke again.  “She won’t be a problem.”

Dean look at Castiel, really looked at him.  When he finished his examination, Dean turned back to the bar and waved to the bartender, ordering another drink for himself but not one for Cas.  The two men sat in silence until the glass of whiskey arrived.  Dean took a swallow and then began to speak.

“Look man, I don’t want to be anyone’s experiment.  I don’t care how hot you are.”  He mumbled the last part as he stared into the amber depths of his glass.  “Are you gay or drunk?”

“Probably both,” Castiel replied without much thought.

Dean turned back to Castiel and cocked an eyebrow.

“Definitely both,” Castiel giggled.

Dean rolled his eyes but huffed out a laugh at the man’s antics.  He made a decision, tipped back the rest of his drink, and dropped enough cash on the bar to pay for their evening and leave a nice tip.  He gave Castiel his sexiest, most seductive smirk; it was a look that never failed and Dean had dubbed it his panty melting stare.  Dean watched Castiel’s eyes darken at the promise the look contained.  He leaned in close, his hand back on Castiel’s thigh, even higher up this time.  “Why don’t we take this up to my room?” Dean asked, his lips brushing against the shell of Castiel’s ear as he spoke.  

Castiel shivered at the contact and nodded, not trusting his voice.  Dean was absolutely intoxicating and, while he supposed it could be the whiskey he had been drinking, Cas was feeling light headed and giddy at the prospect of going upstairs with Dean.  He hadn’t felt this way in at least a year and Cas decided then and there that this was not going to be a one time thing.

Dean stood and held out a hand to Castiel, who allowed himself to be pulled from his his seat and toward the elevators.  They were alone in the elevator lobby and Dean was grateful for that.  He could barely keep his hand off of the blue eyed man as they waited.  They entered the elevator and Dean pulled Castiel towards him as the doors began to close.  

At the last second, an arm flew into the elevator and the doors slid open.  Cas pulled back from Dean but the man left his fingers hooked through his belt loops as a pretty middle-aged woman stepped onto the elevator with them.  She gave both of the men an appreciative glance before her eyes fell solely on Castiel, raking up and down his body.  Dean used his hold on Castiel’s belt loops to possessively pull the man into his body.  A few seconds later, the door was opening again and Dean led Castiel off the elevator and down the hall to their room.

As soon as the hotel door closed behind them, they couldn't keep their hands off one another.

Dean backed Castiel against a wall and practically attacked his mouth.  The kiss was intense, both of the men fighting for dominance with their tongues and teeth.  Eventually, they broke the kiss, panting for air.  Dean leaned back and began working to remove Castiel’s tie before moving to the buttons of the man’s shirt.

Castiel used Dean’s distraction to his advantage, taking control of the situation as he swiftly flipped their positions and pinned Dean against the wall of the hotel room.  His mouth covered Dean’s before he started kissing his way across his jaw and down the column of the man’s neck, listening to the sounds he made and lingering on Dean’s more sensitive spots.  His hands started working on the buttons of Dean’s shirt and, when his fingers fumbled after only two buttons, Cas gave up and grabbed onto the shirt with both hands and pulled, scattering the buttons across the hotel carpet.  When Dean groaned at the dominant action, Castiel smiled against his skin, knowing he had won control.  He brought his mouth to Dean’s now pliant lips and plundered the man’s mouth with his tongue.

Dean moaned into the kiss and his hands moved back to Castiel’s shirt, finishing the job he had started and pushing the garment off of the man’s shoulders.  He broke the kiss and walked Castiel back farther into the room.  Dean dropped to his knees and unbuckled Castiel’s belt before popping the button on his pants.  Dean groaned at the sight.  Castiel had forgone underwear and Dean’s eyes were met with his already erect cock.

Dean knew he was good at sucking cock but he wanted to give Castiel the best damn blow job of his life.  He took his time just looking at the other man.  He took in Castiel’s length with just his eyes until the man above him began to squirm under Dean’s gaze.  Dean lowered his head so that his mouth was hovering just out of reach of Castiel’s erection.  He looked up at Cas through his eyelashes, Dean’s green eyes meeting Castiel’s blues, as his warm breath ghosted over the other man’s cock.  Dean waited; sex was just as much of a mental game as it was physical and Dean was determined to engage all of Cas.

After a few more seconds of Dean staring, Cas let out out a sound that was somewhere between a whimper and a moan.  With a wicked smile, Dean leaned forward and ran his tongue around the swollen head of Castiel’s cock, rewarding him with the contact he craved.  No sooner had he begun, though, and he was pulling away.  Cas emitted an undignified sound that could only be described as a whine and Dean chuckled as he leaned back to rest on his knees.

“Finish taking off your clothes and sit on the edge of the bed,” Dean commanded, “and don’t even think about touching yourself.”

Castiel didn’t usually take orders, especially in the bedroom, but, God, he wanted Dean’s mouth on him again so he scrambled to comply.  He kicked off his shoes and quickly pulled off his socks before moving his hands to his waist and shimmying out of his well-fitting jeans.  Cas tossed his clothes onto a chair and sat where he had been instructed, watching Dean, who had remained kneeling on the floor while he had stripped.  Dean was still wearing his jeans but Cas could tell he had a significant bulge hidden under the constricting denim.

Dean cleared his throat and Castiel’s eyes darted from the man’s crotch to his face.  Dean was smiling again, that same wicked, predatory, sexy smile from earlier.  He locked eyes with Cas and slowly crawled - fucking crawled - over to the bed like a lion stalking its prey.  Cas could hear the blood pounding in his ears as Dean’s face drew level with his erection and his breath hitched when the man’s talented, pink tongue darted out to wet his lips.  Dean put his hands on Castiel’s knees and peered up at his lover.  “Do you want this, sweetheart?” Dean asked, a playful glint in his eye.

“God, yes,” Cas breathed in reply.  He wanted Dean and he wanted him to stop stalling.

“Mmm, I don’t know,” Dean teased as his hands slid up Castiel’s legs and began massaging his thighs, thumbs rubbing circles into the meat of his muscles.  “That didn’t sound very convincing.”  His warm breath crossed over Castiel’s erection and the man moaned in desperation.

“Dean, I want it, I want you,” Cas offered and he watched Dean’s smirk grow.  “I want your mouth on me, please.  Please,” Castiel knew Dean wanted him to beg and, right now, he wasn’t above it if begging was going to get things moving.  “I need your lips and tongue on me, Dean.  Your mouth is so beautiful.”

The complement finally tipped Dean over the edge and spurred him into action.  With a groan, Dean practically lunged forward, taking Castiel’s cock deep in his mouth and reducing the blue eyed man’s words to a hiss.  One of Dean’s hands wrapped around the base of his partner’s erection - he didn’t want to use all of his best tricks at the start - and he began pumping Cas in time with the movement of his mouth and tongue.

Dean hollowed his cheeks and bobbed his head back, releasing all but the tip of Castiel’s cock.  He ran his tongue around the head and moaned at the salty taste of Cas.  The vibrations shot through Cas and he groaned in response as Dean grabbed his hands and placed them on his head.  Castiel’s fingers tightened in Dean’s hair as he looked down at him with lust blown eyes.  Dean stared up at his lover as he slowly moved his head forward, engulfing Castiel’s cock in his warm mouth.

Cas felt his erection hit the back of Dean’s throat and expected Dean’s hand to join his mouth.  Instead, Dean fixed him with a sexy stare and relaxed his muscles, taking Cas all the way down.  Castiel was making the most sinful sinful sounds and his moans only got louder when Dean swallowed around him while one of his hands came up and fondled his balls.

Cas tugged on Dean’s short locks, pulling his mouth away.  “I don’t… I want…” Cas panted, “I need to be inside of you.”  Castiel gathered his wits and stood as he helped Dean to his feet.  “The lube is still in my bag, I think.”  He watched as Dean sauntered across the room and rummaged through his bag to find what they needed.  As soon as he was back in reach, Cas grabbed Dean’s hips and threw him down onto the bed before crawling up his body and claiming his mouth with a bruising kiss.  Cas took the bottle from Dean before kissing his way down the man’s toned body.

Cas paid special attention to Dean’s nipples as he made his way lower and lower.  He ran his tongue along the waistband of Dean’s jeans before popping the button with his lips and grabbing the zipper between his teeth.  Dean wasn’t the only one with a talented mouth, he mused.  

Castiel slowly pulled the zipper down, never taking his eyes off of Dean’s.  He brought his hands to his hips, tucking his fingers into the waistband of Dean’s pants and underwear, sliding both down his legs together.

Once Dean was finally naked, Castiel popped open the bottle of lube and slicked up two of his fingers.  He settled himself between Dean’s legs and took his lover’s cock into his mouth as he began to gently prod at Dean’s hole with his middle finger.  Cas sucked and teased Dean as he prepared the man to take his cock.  He would push a finger into his first knuckle while sucking on just the head, releasing it as he drew his finger out.  Cas repeated that action until Dean was panting and squirming above him, trying to simultaneous fuck himself down onto Castiel’s finger and push his cock deeper into the man’s mouth.

Cas chuckled around Dean and acquiesced to his lover’s desires… to an extent.  He slipped his finger farther into Dean, using about half of it’s length to fuck in and out of him while he dipped his head lower, taking about half of Dean’s erection into his mouth.  He hollowed out his cheeks and bobbed his head in time with the thrusts of his finger, never taking his eyes off of the man beneath him.

“Cas, come on,” Dean panted, “no more teasing.”

Castiel stared up into Dean’s face, a look of total desperation painted across his features.  He took pity on his lover and inserted a second finger, slowly pushing both in, gently stretching and penetrating Dean’s ass as he swallowed down the man’s cock, taking it to the hilt.  Cas moaned around Dean as one of the green eyed man’s hands threaded into his hair and tugged at his locks.  

Dean’s hips bucked and with every thrust he pushed himself into Castiel’s warm mouth and then back onto his fingers.  Dean shifted his hips, trying to line Cas up with his prostate but the infuriating man shifted with him.  Dean groaned at the stimulation he was receiving and because what he wanted was just out of reach, which caused Cas to chuckle around his cock.

Castiel released Dean’s erection with a final, slow drag of his lips and tongue and pulled his two fingers from Dean’s ass.  He poured more lube onto his hand and returned his fingers to Dean’s hole, gently thrusting two fingers in and out of his partner.  

“Cas, come on,” Dean whined, “I’m ready.”  His breathing was heavy and Castiel could barely see the green that ringed Dean’s lust blown pupils.

Cas smirked at Dean.  “No you’re not and we both know it,” he replied, brushing his fingers against Dean��s prostate and causing the beautiful man to gasp in pleasure.  Cas pumped his fingers with a little more speed now, bumping against the bundle of nerves every few thrusts and enjoying the sounds that spilled from Dean’s lips and the way his cock stiwched with every pass of Castiel’s fingers.  Without any warning, Cas added a third finger and Dean groaned and hissed at the stretch.  “Told you you weren’t ready for my cock,” he chuckled as he nailed Dean’s prostate again, using pleasure to numb the sting Dean was feeling.  Cas continued stretching Dean until he was satisfied that he would be able to slide into his body without hurting the man.

Dean whimpered at the empty feeling when Cas removed his fingers.  He shifted his hips on the bed, humping the air as Castiel lubed up his cock.  

“If you miss my fingers that much, I could just keep fucking you with them,” Cas mused.  He smiled down at Dean innocently as he spoke.  Sure, he had been begging Dean earlier but he was enjoying teasing the man now that he had full control of the situation.  Cas pressed two of his fingertips against Dean’s hole and his lover’s body welcomed him in.  Dean’s face, on the other hand, was not quite as accommodating.

“Don’t you fucking dare,” Dean ground out as Castiel’s fingers toyed with his entrance.  He didn’t take his eyes off of Cas util he felt the blunt head of the man’scock replace his fingers on his ass.  As Cas slowly pushed in, Dean’s head fell back and his jaw dropped open before he took his lower lip between his teeth and bit down on it. It was perhaps the most beautiful sight Castiel had ever seen.

Cas kept his pace slow but steady as he pressed into Dean’s warmth.  His face was awash with pleasure as he reacted to the sensations Castiel’s cock was creating.  Once he was fully seated inside of Dean, Cas paused to give the man a moment to adjust, trusting that he would let Cas know when he was ready.

Sre enough, Dean was squirming beneath him a few seconds later.

“You alright, baby?” Cas asked, wanting verbal confirmation from Dean along with his body language.

Dean nodded.  “Yes, God yes,” he panted.  “Please, just move.  Fuck me, Cas, please.”

Castiel could hear the quiet desperation in Dean’s voice and decided that it needed to change.  Desperation, yes.  Cas liked that.  But quiet... Well that part needed to go.  Castiel pulled out of Dean almost all the way, waited for his lover’s body to catch up with the empty feeling again, and then quickly thrust forward, filling Dean with his cock and setting a bruising pace.

Dean was panting and moaning as a sheen of sweat covered his body but Cas still wasn’t happy with the noises he was drawing from the man.  He tangled one of his hands in Dean’s hair and tugged on it in time with his thrusts.  Dean reached out and returned the favor, pulling Cas down into a kiss and moaning his pleasure into the man’s plus mouth.  

Cas nipped at Dean’s lower lip and kissed along his jaw as he changed the angle of his thrusts.  The next time he drove his hips forward, Cas pounded into Dean’s prostate.  Much to Castiel’s delight, Dean cried out into the hotel room and he found himself grateful that they had booked a suite, their bedroom didn’t share a wall with another guest’s room and he could continue to draw these kinds of noises from his lover without fear of disrupting anyone’s sleep.

As Cas continued fucking himself into Dean’s prostate, the shouts and profanities quickly devolved into gibberish.  Castiel knew he was close to his climax so he brought his still lube slick hand between their bodies and began jerking Dean off.  

“FUCK,” Dean shouted.  “I’ gonna… I’m gonna…” he was sputtering, unable to finish his thought.

Cas pulled on Dean’s hair again as he continued pumping the man’s erection and thrusting into his body.  “Do it, Dean.  Let me hear you, love.”

The words and one final tug of his cock sent Dean over the edge into the bliss of his orgasm.  He shouted his release into the room and Cas followed him soon after, filling Dean with his cum while Dean’s sprayed onto their chests.

Castiel collapsed on top of Dean for a few moments before he forced himself out of the bed so that he could clean them up.  Once that was done, he crawled back in bed beside Dean and found himself enveloped within his lover’s strong arms.

Dean woke up the next day wrapped around Castiel.  He inhaled deeply, taking in the man’s scent before he carefully shimmied out of the bed and made his way to the bathroom.  He relieved himself and brushed his teeth before returning to the bedroom.  He loved the quiet moments like this, when he could just lay beside Cas and watch him sleep.  Dean slid back into the bed, doing his best to not wake the other man but the bed in the hotel room was much more springy than their mattress at home and the second round of bouncing caused Castiel’s eyes to flutter open.

Cas smiled sleepily at Dean, reaching out to cup his lover’s face

“Last night was fun,” Dean remarked, “pretending we didn’t know each other was fucking hot.”  Dean paused for a moment, looking down as he grabbed Castiel’s hand before quietly adding, “and the wedding ring was a nice touch, Cas.”  Dean was holding the other man’s left hand in his right and looking at the ring.  He turned Castiel’s hand from side to side and watched the light shine over the silver colored metal.  He didn’t want to admit it out loud but Dean kind of liked the look of the wedding band on Cas’s finger and how it’s presence told the world that the handsome man wearing it was spoken for.  

“We are celebrating our fourth anniversary, Dean,” Cas commented.  “Perhaps we should consider making jewelry like this a more permanent addition to our wardrobes.”

“Are you proposing, Cas?” Dean asked with a sly smile.

“Not at all, Dean,” Cas replied as he leaned forward and pressed his lips to his boyfriend’s, “but you certainly should.”

Destiel Tags from @mrswhozeewhatsis: @mrswhozeewhatsis @theficlibrarium @deandoesthingstome @thegleegeneration @sinceriouslyamellpadalecki @ferferelli @fangirling-instead-of-working @chrisatplay @faith-in-dean @mamaimpala @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @curliesallovertheplace @skybinx-blog @purgatoan @impossible-box @deansleather @faegal04 @sunriserose1023 @dr-dean @jelly-beans-and-gstrings @saving-things-hunting-family @jotink78 @i-dont-know-how-to-write @notnaturalanahi @howmanytuesdaysdidyouhave @mysaintsasinner @besslincoln-bruh @shelovesallthethings @revwinchester @klaineaholic @hexparker @vintagevalentinexx @sis-tafics @meganwinchester1999

SPN Pond Destiel Tags: @manawhaat @dr-dean @thing-you-do-with-that-thing @notnaturalanahi @impala-dreamer @scorpiongirl1 @deandoesthingstome @jelly-beans-and-gstrings @mrswhozeewhatsis @sinceriouslyamellpadalecki @whywhydoyouwantmetosaymyname @chaos-and-the-calm67 @madamelibrarian @writingbeautifulmen @thewinchestielboys @drariana1737 @castieltrash1 @mysaintsasinner @ruined-by-destiel @deals-with-demons @faith-in-dean

[zummar]

Being Human

A/N: This is for @waywardjoy‘s 500 challenge

Prompt: “What’s that smell? “Me.”

Wordcount: 1800ish

Warnings: Smut, oral sex, mastrubation, slight depression.

Pleas comment and like =)

He had been around for millions of years, but never had he felt as miserable as he had the last week. Seven days since he lost his wings, seven days

this earth, seven days knowing that every angel in this universe was out to get him. This was an all time low.

The first days he hadn’t slept or eaten, he simply didn’t know that he needed to, not until Dean, with mild force had led him into the bedroom across his, gave him a sandwich and a big glass of water before telling Cas to get undressed while he undid the bed. A dazed Cas had done as he’d been told, no arguments, to be honest, he didn’t even have the strength to argue.

His first sleep had lasted for almost 16 hours and waking up was actually pleasant, for a moment, until the world came crushing down over him again, before the pain from the scars on his back brought him back to the present. A present that was...he moaned,he didn't wanna think about it, and hadn't it been for the pressing feeling in his lower abdomen he would have turned over and fallen asleep again.

He got up, tried to sort his thoughts, he looked at the clock, 8.34am, maybe Dean was awake.

Cas put on a grey t-shirt that someone left for him on the chair beside the bed. It was a little bit too big, it smelled of detergent and was soft against his skin.

He knocked on the door across the hallway “Dean?”

“Mmm, yeah?”

He heard the muffled voice through the door and pushed the door handle down to open.

“Um...Dean?” Cas hesitated “There’s something wrong with me..I think.” he tilted his head to the side.

Dean heaved himself up against the headboard, stroking his face as he yawned. “What is it? Are you feeling sick?”

“No, or” he tried to find the words “it feels strange, here” he pointed at his crotch.  Dean’s eyes was automatically following Cas gesture.

“Oh, God, Cas!” Dean blushed when realising where his eyes had fallen, he looked away for a second and then back to the angels face “How does it feels strange?”

“Oh, um it’s like a pressure, like I'm about to burst or something, it feels like I really need to focus for that not happen” he looked really miserable standing there in the doorway.

“You probably need to pee, Cas”

“Oh….how? I mean...I think I sort of know how, but...How?”

Dean sighed.

Being human wasn’t easy, Cas thought to himself as he cleaned the toilet seat. Of course Dean had instructed him on how to stand and pee, and aiming wasn’t as simple as Dean had made it out to be, not for a beginner at least. Cas wasn’t sure if he’d ever get used to it, but the feeling as the pressure subsided was...fantastic.

However, that feeling had only lasted so long before the darkness spread over him again. He wandered his way to the bedroom and tumbled back into bed, pulled the covers over himself and lay there, staring into the wall.

Periodically Dean would check in on him, Cas answered when spoken to but didn’t make any efforts to socialize. The wallpaper and the shadows cast by the bedside lamp was the only thing he payed any attention to, and when Dean came and forced him to eat because “You’re human now, you need it” he did as he was told.

Food was a pleasant experience, he had to admit, but it had consequences; having to get up to use the bathroom.

For days this continued, until Dean on day seven forced him to get up

“You need to take a shower, sunshine, ‘cause let me tell you, you don't exactly smell like roses” he tried to sound perky and upbeat but the worry shone through.

He helped his friend up from the bed, and with his hand on Cas’ back he guided him along the corridor towards the bathroom. Turning the last corner, they ran into Sam who looked dismayed by the angel’s appearance, the unshaved face, the greasy hair, the wrinkly t-shirt,  all adding up to a rather dire sight.

Sam wrinkled his nose “What’s that smell?”

Cas met Sam’s eyes as he took a deep breath. “Me” he sighed “I believe that what you’re smelling is me”  he took a whiff in the area of his armpit and nodded, “definitely me”

“Yeah, I thought it was time for our dear friend here to get to know how a shower works”  

Cas squinted at Dean and sighed as he looked down at his feet. He didn’t really feel like learning new things,what he wanted was his wings back, his grace, this human thing was really tiring.

Dean followed Cas into the bathroom, told him to get undressed and placed him under the hot running water. He told him how to shampoo his hair and helped him scrub his back. Cas enjoyed this part of being a human. Showering wasn’t such a horrible thing, maybe he could get used to this?

****

Dean hated to see him like this, beaten, down, like nothing was ever going to make him happy again. Of course, Castiel normally didn’t have the most upbeat personality but this, this was just heartbreaking. A shower would hopefully help a bit on the way, and aiding him he saw a slight difference, a small light in his eyes. Dean felt cautiously optimistic when he saw the angel close his eyes as he let the hot water run over his face. He looked calm, almost like the water was washing away his past days trouble and Dean watched, lost in the moment. He finally came to his senses when Castiel asked about the conditioner “was it really something he needed to use and where was it supposed to be used”

****

Cas was handed a towel and shown  to the high chair Dean had brought in.

“Sit down, I’ll help you shave”

He drew the razor effortlessly through the forest of his beard, grazing the contours of his jaw while Cas adapted to his every move. Sitting there, Dean standing between his knees, feeling his hand on his face he couldn’t help but glancing up at the man. His green eyes focused, brows slightly frowned.

He thought to himself watching Dean bite his lower lip in concentration, deep creases between furrowed brows.

“Aaand, I’m done!” Dean leaned back to admire his work.

Cas stood up, just to find himself so close to Dean he could feel his breath against his naked cheek when he exhaled. Cas eyes lingered on Dean’s lips as he leaned in and gave him a kiss.

For a split second he panicked.

“

 then he felt Dean’s hands trailing up his bare arms and relaxed just a little. The response from Dean made Cas’ heart beat so hard he could feel it pounding against his rib cage.

Kisses intensifying, hands exploring the other man’s body,  panting breaths, silent moaning the surreal feeling of being the only two people in the world.

“Hi, guys i need the bathroom” Dean and cas were jolted back to reality with brutal force, staring at eachother, wide smiles on their faces.

Dean cleared his throat.

“Yeah, we’re just about done, he’s had an ‘extreme makeover -Bunker edition’” handing Cas his clothes he opened the door, Sam leaning against the opposing wall, towel and clean clothes folded in his arms.

Both Cas and Dean tried to look  indifferent to what had happened between them. They didn't dare to meet the other’s eyes and Cas quickly excused himself, pointing at the clothes he hadn't yet put on.

“I, I better go...help him, you know, this thing, being human, not easy” Dean could hear that he was rambling nervously but he just couldn't stop. Sam’s brows shooting higher and higher for every word. “ well, you know, he's been having a rough time lately and I think he needs me” Dean’s eyes widened when he realized what he'd said “I mean, needs me, his friend and, I should just…”  he turned on his heels and left his brother in the corridor.

Cas was standing in the middle of his room when Dean entered.

“Cas, I...Hi” nervous tremor in his voice.

“Hi, Dean” there was light i his eyes again, a little smile showing in the corner of his mouth as he glanced sideways at the man in the doorway.

Dean locked the door behind him and in two big steps he was standing in front of Cas, their lips locking before they even embraced each other. Dean’s hands trailing every muscle of Cas’ back, Cas’ arms around Dean’s neck, fingers raking through his hair.

Cas fingers eagerly unbuttoning Dean’s shirt, sliding the plaid fabric off his shoulders, finally feeling his bare skin under the palms of his hands. Dean unbuckled his belt and almost simultaneously ripped the towel off Cas’ hips. Stepping out off his jeans he pressed against Cas’ naked body in a tight hug.

Dean gently pushed Cas towards the bed, making him sit down and kneeled befpre him. He kissed every inch of Cas’s chest, let his tongue play with his nipple, kissing his abdomen and down to his thighs. Cas had never felt anything like this before, and when Dean’s hand softly stroke Cas’ erection he gasped. Dean took a firm grip of his cock and slowly brought it up and down. Cas was moaning, Dean gave him a crooked smile as he licked the tip and then took him in his mouth. Tongue swirling around him, lips tight around him. Cas looked down at the man giving him so much pleasure, he thrusted his hips upwards to come even deeper inside. Dean made a sound and the vibrations from voice transferred to Cas’ cock and further into his being. It was warm and wet and wonderful he thought as the tension increased.

“Oh, Dean…” he moaned when he the orgasm grew closer “I...don’t...know, what’s happening?” he panted, the feeling was overwhelming and he fell backwards onto the bed as he came deep inside Dean’s mouth. Dean jerking himself off, coming in big white puddles on the floor beside the bed as he eagerly drank all of Cas’ cum.

Dean crawled up into the bed. Cas held out his arm and Dean rested his head on his chest. Cas’ fingers played against Dean’s shoulder, he looked down at him, kissed his forehead and said with a smile “Maybe being human isn’t so bad”

[whispersandwhiskerburn]

Maybe, Someday

Summary: Dean gets a call in a crappy motel room from a drunk Jo. Slightly angsty with flirty drunk confessions ensue. Word Count: 1,135 (tiny for me, I know) Pairing: Dean x Jo Warnings: Bit of language, bit of angsty thoughts dealing with the job of hunting. It starts off angstyish, but it ends flirty, fluffy, slightly hopeful—kinda like any drunk dial, am I right? SFW Author’s Note: This was written for my bestie @waywardjoy’s 500 follower celebration “Love the Ships”. She’s literally the best, and if you aren’t following her, go do so. My prompts were to pick a pairing and use the dialogue lines, “There’s no ‘I’ in ‘team’.” “There’s also no ‘I’ in ‘masturbate’. Your point?” I picked Dean x Jo because I LOVE Jo Harvelle, and I thought their relationship had promise…stupid hell hounds….Anyway, this is canon style so nothing really happens (because nothing got a chance to happen on the show *grumble grumble*). In fact, my bitterness that nothing ever got to develop definitely shows up in this little fic. I don’t usually write pairings, so feedback would be great!

“Nnnnnnnnnnnnn.”

Dean jolted awake quickly at the odd sound in the room. Years of being a hunter, a whole life of it, had made him a light sleeper.

“NnnnnnnnnNNNNNNNN.”

This time his eyes pinpointed on his vibrating cell phone charging on the bedside table in the crappy hotel room. Sam was still passed out in the neighboring bed—he’d had nightmares the last couple of nights. Prior cases, monsters, Hell—in their line of work, nightmares were even more common than adrenaline rushes.

Dean snagged the phone and opened it, stopping the buzzing as he rolled out on the opposite side of the bed, away from Sam. Hopefully the guy could get some rest tonight.

He walked out of the room on soft bare feet, snagging the hotel card key before walking outside in the cool night air.

“Hello? Dean, you there?” The woman’s voice was muffled against his chest, but he made sure he was outside and the door was shut before he looked at the caller ID on the screen.

“Jo? Are you okay?” The last he’d heard, she was hunting while Ellen was still at the Roadhouse.

“You’re as bad as mom.” Jo’s voice was slightly slurred and Dean smiled, recognizing a drunk dial when he heard one. “’Are you okay?’ Like I can’t perfectly take care of myself well….”

“Fair enough. You working a case?” Dean walked the last ten feet between the motel room door and Baby, scooting up onto the hood. The cold metal against his mostly bare legs was enough of a shock to wake him the rest of the way up. It was a little after 2 am, and he was sitting on his car in shorts and a t-shirt, talking on the phone with a beautiful woman—the side of hunting he didn’t get to see much.

“Always, Dean. That’s the job, isn’t it? Kill one monster, save a few people, then go find something else to hunt. Doin’ what we can to make the world a better place.” Jo’s tone was hard, mocking—her usual go-get-‘em attitude worn down and bitter.

Dean let the silence sit there for a minute, thinking over what he could say that wouldn’t get him a dial tone response.

“Talk to me, Jo. What happened?” He kept his voice gentle, hoping she would confide in him.

He always wanted to help her out, protect her. Ever since they first met—well, after she’d lowered the gun from his face, that is. Then he’d worked the H.H. Holmes case with her, and she was good. A damn fine hunter: brave, resourceful, and in it for the right reasons, unlike some of his fellow hunters. In it because she wanted to help people, and because it made her feel closer to her father.

But when that father was dead at the fault of a Winchester…it made being close to either Bill Harvelle or Dean Winchester difficult.

“Wraith case. Damn thing had a taste for kid brains—operating out of a family psychiatry clinic. Bastard.” Dean heard Jo take a drink of something before continuing. God, he wished he could be there to hold her; cases with kids were always tough. “One silver bullet to the heart killed that fucker dead.”

“But, surprise, surprise, it didn’t bring back those kids.” Apparently she was a chatty drunk. Dean let her get it out. Partly because he didn’t know what to say, but mostly because she needed to. Sometimes ranting at the world and the evil in it was all that kept a person sane.

“And Mom—she’s pissed at me still. Ever since I walked out to hunt. Every time I try to call, she can only talk for a few minutes before she starts dropping hints about wanting me to come home, how I shouldn’t be hunting alone.” She was more coherent now—maybe anger had a sobering affect for her.

“Maybe she’s not wrong, Jo. You’re still pretty new at this, and having backup isn’t a bad thing. Why don’t you team up with Sam and me?” Dean regretted the words the minute they were out of his mouth, worried they would set her off, or bring up painful memories of their dads again.

“Please, so you could treat me like a child?” Dean definitely didn’t think of her as a child. “Or so I can be the female sidekick to your little brother team? Pass. I work better alone.”

He wished she wasn’t so dismissive. Yeah, he worried about her, and if she was here he probably would be protective of her, but he’d also get to see her smile, and maybe see if they could ever actually go anywhere. “C’mon, Jo. There’s no ‘I’ in ‘team’.”

“There’s also no ‘I’ in ‘masturbate’, and I do that better alone too. Your point?”

Dean burst out laughing at that, unable to control himself. God, he wished he could have this recorded to play back for her when she was sober. Knowing Jo though, she would either laugh it off then or punch him. Again.

“Any time you want an audience for that particular show, sweetheart, you just sign me up, okay?”

“Keep dreaming, Winchester.” And he would, too.

She was laughing now too, and Dean was glad he made her lighten up some. This job was dark, and finding a little fun was necessary to stay sharp.

“Seriously, Jo. If you ever need anything—help in a hunt, or just someone to talk to, even when you’re sober,” he heard her scoff and kept going before she could interrupt, “I need you to know you can call me, okay?”

Jo sighed, and he heard her put the bottle or glass down on a surface on the other end of the phone. “Sure thing, Dean. And that goes both ways, you know? I don’t want you to think that just because of what I said last time… I just mean, that I don’t blame you for….” She was definitely more clear-headed now if she could stop herself from saying what she clearly wanted to.

“Yeah, I know.” He knew. He always did. The connection between them had always been a bittersweet thing; like she’d told him once—wrong place, wrong time. Dean always felt like he and Jo were just one or two steps away from getting something great, before it all got screwed up again.

Another part of this wonderful life they both led.

But maybe, someday….

“Yeah, maybe someday…” Jo repeated, and Dean realized he’d said that last bit out loud.

The silence was thick over the line as neither one of them wanted to go too far. She’d been drinking, and they were states away from each other, and miles of distance more in baggage.

But maybe, someday….

I went down with this ship, so this fic is being sent to you from the bottom of an ocean of my tears....

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[spnisbae666]

The Gift She Kept

Pairing: Gabriel x Meg Masters

Warning: Slight Smut? 

Word Count: 1,419

Plot/Promt: “You kept it...” 

“Don’t you start reading too much into this. You gave me something. I liked it. End of story.” 

For @waywardjoy ship challenge :D

Hope you enjoy, it starts out good but then just falls apart after that xD

They first met a few months ago, the two of them stupidly agreed to helping the hardy boys with a case they were working. The case involved supernatural beings and some underground ring of, well she couldn't remember. When she thinks back to that night she remembers Gabriel, the archangel, being her partner in this. She also remembers how annoyed she would get by his teases. The one that annoyed her the most was “demonic princess,” which he started to call her after he found out she was the daughter of a prince of hell.  She also remembers his arm wrapped around her waist as he not so shyly, grabbed her ass whenever he could. It was for show but she certainly wasn’t complaining.

When she thinks back to that night, the biggest thing she remembers is the hotel room. The way he pushed her against the wall as the two practically ripped each others clothes off. Saying teases which only made the other go a bit rougher in their actions. The way Gabriel picked her up and threw her onto the bed before climbing on top of her. The noises he’d make as she dug her nails into his skin, causing red marks. Their lips swollen from how hard they kissed each other. The way her breathing hitched when he thrusted into her. The way he pinned down her wrists above her head when she attempted to get control of the situation. The two of them moaning each other’s names as they reached their highs. She noted in that moment that sex with an archangel was by far the best she’s ever had.

She also remembers getting up the next morning, naked and alone in the bed. She was a one night stand but it didn’t really affect her that much. She got up and found her cloths to get dressed in. She was about to leave until she saw a note on the night stand along with some object. She approached it and read the note first which read, ‘Morning Megarino, I bet you were heart broken to wake up and not have the hot sexy archangel next to you. Well, I doly apologize as I would have loved to see you in the morning but some stuff has come up. Now, before you go and think I’m a jerk, I never have done the ‘one night’ thing with a real woman before, fake woman i conjure up however, that’s a different story. I do in a way feel bad so please accept the necklace as an apology for my absence. Sincerely, that hot archangel you banged.’

She lightly rolled her eyes at that and looked down at the nightstand. There was a beautiful silver necklace with a sparkly amethyst rock. It was quite stunning to her so, even though she wasn’t much for gifts, she kept it. Not like she was gonna see him again any how.

That’s her memories of that night. Now she was casually laying in her own motel room, watching the latest episode of Dr. Sexy M.D. She was a sucker for stuff like that but she would never admit that to anyone because what kind of demon loves celebrity gossip and drama shows? It’s not like she did anything else anyways. Being on the run from hell limits your activities as a demon. She was starting to come to terms with that, with the laying low, living a human-ish life.

She laid back in the bed as she watched the television, not paying too much attention to it as it was a rerun. Sure it was the latest episode but she had already watched it once. It wasn’t till she heard the words “demonic princess” did she start to pay attention to the show. The scene was doctor Sexy walking towards the camera before he stopped right in front of it. “Hello beautiful, miss me?” He asked, her? She couldn’t tell. The figure in the tv was staring right at her. She didn’t remember this part of the episode. It didn’t click until she saw the figure appearances dissolve into another familiar face.  

“Gabriel?” She asked questioningly. Once the name fell from her lips the man in the box smirked and snapped his fingers. When he did the Tv screen went black. She stared at it with furrowed brows.

“The one and only.” He said, appearing behind her.

This caused her to jump and turn around. She sighed a little annoyed to show that she didn’t like being snuck up on of sorts. “Woah, to what do I owe the pleasure?” She asked in a sarcastic voice with cause him to smirk.

He walked over to the bed and stood in front of her. She sat up and tilted her head up to look at him. He looked down at her and gently caressed her cheek. This was the woman he couldn’t get out of his mind. He tried, no amount of porn could get this damn demon out of his head. There was just something different about her that captivated him to her. “I believe the pleasure is all mine.” He sassed back.

She let out a short laugh and gently leaned into his touch. When she realized what she was doing she pulled away and laid back, putting her weight on her arms. “What are you doing here, Gabriel?”

“Would you believe I just wanted to visit my favorite demonic princess again?” He asked, turning his back to her too look around the cheap motel room. Something caught his attention so he stopped and started to walk towards the table.

“No, you don’t seem like the type.” Meg said, watching him curiously. She stood up and followed him as he picked something up.

“You….. You kept it?” He said, genuinely surprised. He turned to her and smirked as he held the necklace in his hands.

“Don’t you start reading too much into this. You gave me something, I liked it. End of story.” She said looking at the necklace and back to him.

“Hmm you sure you liked it? Or liked the fact that a hot sexy archangel gave it to you?” He asked, walking towards her as she took steps away. This went on till her back was up against the wall. Gabriel placed his hand against the wall right next to her head.

Her breathing hitched a little as she watched him. She had to admit that her thought had gone back to him on more than one occasion. She even found his porno one night which she spent the first half laughing her ass off that an angel was in a porno in the first place, the second half however, was her own personal business. “In your wet dreams.”

“Oh most definitely~” Gabriel teased back as he leaned into her real close. “You know, a demon and an angel, complete sin. Probably one of the worst sins an angel can make.” He spoke, eyeing her up and down before wrapping the necklace around her neck and clipping it on her. “But for some reason, my thoughts just as your own keeping coming back to that night and well, you.”

“You know, girls like privacy when it comes to their own heads.” Meg sassed back but was intrigued by what he was saying as it was true for her.

“Oh I didn’t read your mind, sweetheart, but thanks for the confirmation.” He grinned devilishly as he watched her get a little flustered by that. He was surprised that he could even get her embarrassed like that, and to him it was cute. “Well with that confirmed now why don’t you let me-” His hand trailed from her shoulder to her chest, avoiding her breasts. He was moving his hand to grab the necklace and hold it in his hand a little, examining it. “Let me take you on date, any where your little demonic heart desires. Ask and you shall receive.” He said most likely mocking some movie. He smile at her and let go of the necklace.

“Hmm what if I wanna skip the main course and go right for desert?” She asked teasingly. She didn’t know it possible but it felt as if her heart was racing a little because of him. She didn’t mind. Being a refugee of hell basically she now allowed herself to feel whatever she wanted.

He smirked and placed his hands on her hips. “That I can do too~”

[iwantthedean]

A Hit and a Miss

Summary: A special moment goes a slightly awry.  Pairing: Misha x Ashley (Mishley) Word Count: 1000 Warnings: None. Challenge: @waywardjoy‘s Love the Ships Challenge! I’m sure some people will think I’m nuts, but Misha and Ashley are my OTP. I mean, how can they not be ... I invented the pairing! ;) Edit: You’d probably like to know my prompt as well, haha. “If you were going to make an ass of yourself ...” “When don’t I make an ass of myself over you?”

Ashley clapped her hands excitedly as she and Misha took their seats in the Citi Field baseball stadium. She had been to games before, but never a playoff game, and never this close to the field.

She carefully balanced a beer in one hand and a hot dog in the other as the first pitch was thrown. Maybe at first glance she was a girly-girl who did makeup for a living, but that was no reason not to enjoy America’s pastime as far as Ashley was concerned.

“Mish, these seats are great,” she gushed. “I can’t believe I’m actually watching the Mets in a playoff game!”

“They make it to the Series, we’ll be there, too,” Misha promised.

Ashley smiled around a mouthful of hot dog. Misha smiled back; maybe baseball wasn’t as much something he enjoyed like Ashley did, but for her, he’d endure just about anything.

“So, you’re going to commentate for me, right?” he teased her.

Ashley rolled her eyes. “Isn’t it your habit to read like five books about something before you attend an event?”

Misha laughed. “You’re right, that does sound like me. C’mon, at least fill me in a little bit.

With a deep sigh, Ashley finished off her hot dog, set her beer in the cup-holder, and gave an animated lecture on the basics of baseball. He was a quick study on the sport, Ashley found, and by the top of the second inning, they were enjoying the game together.

Around the sixth inning, Misha started acting funny. He was downing beers faster than Ashley could even order them from the beer guys roaming the stands, so she threw in some more hot dogs and even some Cracker Jack popcorn. Anything to soak up all the alcohol he was drinking.

At the end of the seventh inning, there was a brief break in the game, and the kiss cam started going around. The huge video board by the score board lit up with a big heart with Prince’s “Kiss” played over the loudspeaker. Ashley giggled at the cute couples and their expressions as they realized they were the ones on camera before making the kiss quick so they didn’t miss their chance.

After several couples, Prince faded out from the loudspeakers, and the only sound was that of the crowd chattering and cheering. The familiar chords of a Paramore song began to play, and Ashley got just as excited as ever. She grabbed for her phone and flipped the camera to selfie mode.

“The Only Exception!” Ashley exclaimed. “We have to take a picture during this! It’s our song!”

Misha fumbled over his words, still working on not being quite so intoxicated. Before he could come up with a good excuse not to take the picture, the announcer was back on the loudspeaker.

“We have two very special guests at Citi Field tonight, ladies and gentlemen, and one of them has asked us to help in a very special moment. Misha Collins and Ashley Fredette, please report to the pitcher’s mound.”

Ashley’s jaw went slack, surprise drowning her features. Misha reached out a hand to help her stand up. He dropped over the wall first before helping Ashley over onto the field.

They made way for the pitcher’s mound amongst cheers and applause.

“What is going on?” Ashley asked.

Misha gave her a lopsided grin. “You’ll find out.”

When they finally made it to their destination, Misha took a microphone from one of the stadium’s interns, and Ashley nervously fidgeted with her clothes and her hair.

“Thanks for not rushing the field since I’m interrupting the game everyone,” Misha chuckled. “As many of you know, Ashley and I have been together for a couple of years now, and I wanted to do something really special for her. This is a moment I’ve been thinking about since our first date, and Ashley deserves the world.

With the microphone in one hand, and Ashley’s in the other, Misha knelt down in the dirt and looked up at his girlfriend.

“You’ve completely changed my life, Ash. There’s never anything that happens, good or bad, that you’re not the first person I want to share it with. You’re my best friend and the most amazing woman I’ve ever met. I love you, and that love just grows every day. Living life without you – I don’t know and I don’t want to know what that life would be like. Will you marry me?”

Ashley replied with a tearful and immediate, “Yes!”

Misha stood and kissed her, then, with the hand not holding the microphone he fished in all of his pockets for the ring. His eyes went wide as he looked at the crowd first, and then at Ashley.

“I, uh, seem to have forgotten the ring,” he said, clearing his throat. “I feel like a royal idiot right now. But hey, she said yes!”

The crowd cheered for them again, and Misha handed the microphone back to the intern. Ashley attacked him with a fierce hug and a kiss, then they went back to their seats.

 Later on at home, Ashley chuckled at the picture of her holding up a ringless left hand, both her and Misha making excited faces. She posted it to Instagram and added, At least it’ll be a good story to tell! Can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you. #CollinsPartyofTwo

She looked up from posting and the picture, and there was her fiancé, down on one knee in front of her, a diamond ring in his hand.

“Sure you want to marry me, even though I forgot the ring?”

Ashley held out her hand, and Misha slipped the ring onto her finger. “Absolutely I do. I mean, as far as how, if you were going to make an ass of yourself …”

Misha couldn’t help but laugh. “When don’t I make an ass of myself over you?”

Ashley laughed too, then happily lost herself in Misha’s sweet, lingering kiss.

[plague-deene]

I didn't draw spinearl in a while and that's a crime

Doodles of spinel and pink pearl and i lovetheship-

[zummar]

Feathers

(A/N: So this is my first ever fanfic. Pretty much my first ever writing but I think it came out OK and I hope You will enjoy it.ts for the “love the ships”-challenge hosted by @waywardjoy )

Pairing: Destiel Wordcount: 2496 Varnings: well…angst i guess. Conversation prompt: “I told you I didn’t want you here” “I know, I’m here anyway. What are you going to do about it?”

A big thank you to @in2lalaland  and @tenoko1 for everything =)

If you liked it and want to read the very fluffy contiuation you can find that here https://zummar.tumblr.com/post/159821435747/breakfast

Dean knew right away that Castiel was in the bunker again, he had felt the vibration from the closing door as it echoed down the corridor. Why was he here?

Dean leaned against the doorway, arms crossed over his chest, watching as the angel slowly walked up the few steps to the library. Castiel looked beat, his shoulders drooping, his head turned down and eyes fixed on the floor.

”I told you that I didn’t want you here,” Dean said harshly.

Castiel flinched at the sound of the words reverberating throughout the room. Dean could almost feel how the angel wanted him to look at him and a painful sting shot right through him as he met Castiel’s pleading eyes. It ached, but he had made up his mind; he was not going to go down that path ever again. Not after what had happened.

Castiel took a trembling breath as he moved closer to where Dean was standing. Dean shifted position slightly so he wasn’t facing the other man as much as before. There were too many feelings coiled up and he just couldn’t handle that right now.

”Dean,” the angel’s voice quivered as he spoke ”Can we ta--”

”No,” Dean interrupted ”No...we don’t, it’s better we don’t…”

Castiel sank crestfallen into the nearest chair, arms on the table in front of him and his head in his hands. Dean, still leaning against the doorway, watched reluctantly as the man’s shoulders began to shake. Was he…crying? Dean felt panic rising, he had to get out of there, this was way too much.

Though he might consider himself tough, he could feel his eyes burning. As the first tear tumbled down his cheek, he turned and hurried out into the corridor towards his room. He knew that being in the same place as Castiel, even in the same room would make it impossible to stay strong. He needed to keep his distance, however much it would take.

Just as he turned a corner he slammed right into his brother. The books that Sam had been carrying were thrown out of his arms and he cried out, ”Hey! Man, watch…” Sam stopped when he saw the look of his brother’s face. ”What’s the matter, Dean?”

‘Oh, God…’ Dean felt sick knowing that his brother saw him like this.

He cleared his throat and tried to wipe his eyes without Sam noticing, which of course was a hopeless task. His brother had already seen the tears and his altogether frustrated posture, and no one knew him better than Sam did.

”Nothing, it’s all fine…” he said in futile attempt to get Sam off his case.

Sam looked at him in disbelief, ”Come on, Dean! What is it? Why are you upset?”

”I’m not, I’m…” his voice gave way ”Just let me…I need to, ehum, sorry…sorry ‘bout the books.” He carelessly stepped over the mess and rushed to his room, leaving Sam both concerned and confused in the hallway.

Sam shook his head as he picked up the books and started to the library, just to find Castiel at one of the tables staring unseeingly in front of him.

”Cas?”

”Oh…Hi, Sam…” The angel absentmindedly stroked a hand over his face as he turned toward  Sam who had placed the stack of books in front of him as he sat down across the table.

”Uhm…are you okay, Cas?” There was a troubled crease in Sam’s forehead.

”No…” Castiel sighed and sank even deeper into his seat.

”Why? What happened?” He wanted to ask what happened between him and Dean but he hesitated, wanting Castiel to explain at his own pace.

”I...” Castiel sighed again, fixating his eyes on something in the far distance ”I...don’t really know,  I did something stupid, I guess..” Another deep sigh. ”Your brother doesn’t even want me here anymore.” Castiel looked at Sam, the wretched look in his eyes making Sam feel uneasy

”Tell me what happened, Cas.”

Cas shifted position in his chair as he began to talk. Slowly, and a bit reluctantly, he confessed to his friend that a few nights ago, when Sam had been away, Dean and he ended up in Dean’s room for a movie.

”Yeah? So…this is what you two do, it’s nothing new…” Sam cut in.

Cas took a deep breath as he felt the harsh pain of the memories washing over him.

”I know, it’s just…I…ehum…I love him, Sam,” it came out as nothing more than a whisper, and the angel swallowed hard and looked anxiously down at the table. He didn’t see the small ”I knew it”-smile on his friend’s face, a smile that faded when Sam recalled his friend’s agony.

”But isn’t that a good thing? I mean, he feels the same thing…right?”

”Yes, that seems to be the case…because,” he tilted his head slightly and cleared his throat,” when we were sitting there I accidentally touched his hand, and he didn’t pull away, he let me have my hand against his and…”He stopped, it was like he couldn’t find the words, like they were stuck somewhere mid air and wouldn’t be uttered. He felt ashamed and wrongfully accused at the same time and he couldn’t really understand Dean’s reaction to be honest.

”I was curious, okay?!” Cas said defensively as he sat up straighter. ”I wanted to know for sure, I wanted to know that it wasn’t a mistake, that him not moving his hand meant something…so I,” he stroked the nape of his neck,  ”I sensed him.” He blushed. The angel actually blushed

Sam looked puzzled, a deep frown on his face. ”You sensed him?…what does that even mean?”

Cas fidgeted in his chair. ”I mean, like when I check on you guys for internal injuries, I can do that to sense true feelings too…I’ve never done it before, but I can…” He slumped back in his seat again and looked down at his lap.

”Oh.” Sam leaned back into his chair contemplating what the angel just said. ”So…what happened then?”

”I kissed him.”

”Okay? But he didn’t want you to, or...?” Sam was really confused. He already knew what these two really felt for one another. He got that his brother being human and Cas being an angel might make it difficult for both of them to admit it but there was no doubt in Sam’s mind what was developing between them.

”Oh, no..it’s not that…he seemed very much into it…at first.” Cas blushed again. ”But then…I don’t know…he pushed me away, and told me to leave.” Sam could see tears rising in Cas’ eyes. ”He told me to never come back.”

Dean was sitting on his bed, back against the wall, feet and legs resting on top of the covers, just like he had been sitting that night when Castiel was there with him. He could almost feel the angel beside him. Dean looked at his hand, where it lay on the bed the same way as it had that night. He closed his eyes, remembering Castiel’s hand against his and the jolt of warmth that had suddenly shot from the angel’s hand, right into his heart. He reminisced the way he had leaned in and softly kissed Dean. The taste of the angel’s lips against his, the soft sound of his hand touching the bristles along Dean’s jaw. It had been total bliss, like nothing he had ever experienced before.

But then…that was when everything he had ever feared about loving the angel seemed to come true.

He had opened his eyes and stiffened.

The angel’s wings had been unfolding to surround them both. At first, Dean had been touched by the gesture, then he realized how the feathers were falling like cold winter snow around them. For every new kiss Castiel gave him, more feathers seemed to have dropped from his wings and slowly float down towards the floor and bed.

The words from another angel had begun echoing in his mind, ”The moment he laid a hand on you in hell, he was lost.”

Dean had choked. What if…he couldn’t even finish that train of thoughts, he just knew he needed Cas to get out of there.

He had shoved Castiel off him, almost making the angle fall off the bed.

”You need to go!”

Castiel had been looking very confused by the sudden change in Dean’s demeanor as he regained his balance. ”Why? What happened??”

”Go, just…go!” Dean had turned his back to the angel when putting his feet on the cold floor. His insides trembling with agony.

”Dean, I’m sorry…I really thought you wanted…” Castiel had tried to place a hand on Dean’s shoulder, but was shrugged off as Dean stood up.

”I want..” Dean’s voice had failed him so he cleared his throat and with newfound determination  said ”No, just go. You need to leave!”

Castiel had gotten off the bed and with a distraught look he had tried to catch Dean’s eyes.

”I don’t understand…? Dean, please!”

Dean had looked at Castiel one last time as he walked towards the door with unwilling steps. Dean wanted to stop him, but instead he had laid a hand on the angel’s shoulder and with mild force he had pushed him out into the hallway.

Castiel had tried to say something, plead with him to not do this but Dean had made up his mind. ”Just. Go. Away.” he could still reminisce that horrible and nauseating feeling he had felt as he closed the door in front of the angel.

“Just go…I” he had said through the door. Never had anything hurt as much as this. and he had taken a He took a deep breath before continuing, “I…don’t…want you here, okay?” The sensation of his head against the hard surface of the door still lingered.

He had heard the angel sigh, “But I don’t understand?” out in the hallway.

There had been several minutes until he heard Castiel walking away.

He had sunk down to the floor, back against the door when the first tear had rolled over his face, this was the hardest thing he had ever had to do, but he couldn’t jeopardize Castiel, it was better for him to believe that he didn’t want him, than having him and truly ruining him.

Really, hadn’t he know this all along? Known, that whatever he felt for Castiel he should’ve just let it be, that loving him would make the angel fall even further, that he would make him lose everything? The angel might be ‘lost’, but at least he wasn’t broken, not if Dean could stop it!

Dean woke up from his thoughts by a knock on his door. He tried to straighten his face as he got up  to open it.

“Sam…What do you..?”

He was interrupted by his brother. “I met Cas…”

Dean moved out of Sam’s way and walked over to sit down on the bed again. “Okay...?”

“Dean! He is devastated. What happened? Why did you push him away?”

“So, he told you about that.” It was more of a statement than a question.

“Yes. And I’m pretty sure that there’s more to this than he knows.” Dean could tell Sam was upset underneath his calm exterior. His brother looked at him as he took a couple of deep breaths and recounted what Castiel had told him.

Dean leaned forward, placing his arms on his knees, hands clutched in front of him.

“You don’t understand…” He looked down at his hands to avoid looking at his brother.

“No, I really don’t understand! …you two, you…I mean, don’t tell me you don’t love him, too?”

The light seeping through the gap of the doorway was the only source of light in the room except for the small lamp on Dean’s nightstand, making the mood of the place rather gloomy.

“I do, it’s not that, can’t you see?” Dean threw up his hands in frustration. “I did it because I love him!”

“How does THAT make any sense?”

“I saw him fall apart!” Dean almost shouted at his brother in a moment of exasperation.

Sam sat in silence for a moment, the chair creaking when he leaned back and crossed his arms. “Fall apart?”

“His wings, I saw his wings lose their feathers, one by one…for every kiss. I couldn’t do that to him, make him lose his wings, for me. What if I am the thing that will make him weak?” The anger was gone, replaced with the sound of despair.

Sam left his brother on the bed and walked back to the main room in the hope of finding the angel there. Castiel was as Sam had left him, slumped in his chair, staring blindly at the ceiling.

“Cas.”

The angel turned towards the sound.

“You need to talk to him…”

“I told you, I’ve tried but he doesn’t want to have anything to do with me.”

Sam sighed as he sat down at the table “Cas…he thinks he’s protecting you, that’s why.”

Castiel sat up straight. “Protecting me from what?” His hands clutched the arms of the chair.

“He saw your wings fall apart. He’s afraid that it’s his fault, that you showing your love for him will make you weak.”

Cas didn’t even bother to knock before entering Dean’s room. He found him lying on the bed.

“Dean…” Cas sat down behind Dean, placing one hand on his arm. He could feel the man on the bed flinch under his touch.

“I told you that I didn’t want you here.” Dean’s voice was barely audible.

“I know, I’m here anyway. What are you going to do about it?” Dean turned over on his back. To his surprise the angel was smiling. “You don’t have to worry, I’m not going to lose my wings over you.”

“But I saw…and it got worse with every kiss.”

Cas smiled even brighter as he leaned in over Dean to give him a kiss. “Sometimes angels sheds their wings when exposed to stressful and emotional situations.” He gave him another small kiss and looked him straight in the eyes with a smile. “And human emotions, they’re a powerful thing, my love.”

[zummar]

Breakfast

A/N: The continuation of “Feathers” where Cas wants to make Dean some breakfast. Its for the “love the ships”-challenge hosted by @waywardjoy

Pairing: Destiel Wordcount: 942

The morning after, Cas woke up with his beloved hunter in his arms, legs intertwined, sweaty from the steamy night. He could feel Deans warm breath against his bare chest, rhythmic and calm. He was happy, oh so happy. Never had he ever thought that this feeling existed, this pure exuberant feeling ‘like dancing on clouds’ he thought, laughing silently at the human idiom. But, it was quite right, he had walked on clouds and, yes, he could see the similarities.

There were feathers all over the room. Cas carefully untangled himself from the sleeping man, placed his feet on the floor and as he stood up he unfolded his wings to check on them. Smilingly he examined  his usually majestic, black wings. There were feathers left, he thought he’d still be able to fly, but they were not as thick as they used to be. He grinned widely.

Cas turned around and looked at Dean, who was lying on his stomach, the cover hardly overlaying more than his lower back and thighs. Cas could hear the soft swoosh of yet another feather falling. ”Emotions” he thought to himself as he stroke his hand over his left wing with a pleased sigh. His kind sometimes shed their wings in stressful situations, and human emotions…well, lets just say, angels, being entities that didn’t really “feel” stuff,  weren’t quite equipped to deal with them.

Cas remembered the first time he had felt anything more then the ordinary ”angel feelings” of duty and obedience. That first inkling of human emotions, of what would be, that he felt when he had first laid a hand on Dean in hell. He had held Dean close against his body, his right arm crossed over Deans chest and his hand tightly clenched over Deans left shoulder. Then, he had been on a mission, sent by heaven, to save the righteous man from hell, it was his duty. But holding the hunter, close, feeling his heartbeat underneath his arm he felt…at home? He couldn’t quite pinpoint the exact name for it, and that didn’t really matter now, did it? It was a long time ago, so much had happened since then and every time he had been around Dean since then, he had felt yet another set of feelings appear. Almost like he was given a new piece of a puzzle that in the end had led to him realizing that Dean was so much more than a friend.

Cas put on a t-shirt and some boxers and ventured out in the hallway towards the kitchen. He was going to make his human some breakfast! He didn’t really know how, apart from him being human for a short while he had never really had to make any sorts of food. But how hard could it be? He had survived several months as a human so he couldn’t be that awful. He hummed to himself as he walked down the corridor, leaving a trail of feathers behind him. He opened the refrigerator and picked some things at random. A beer, some bread, a cup of what was hopefully juice, and a salad. He was pretty sure Dean didn’t really like salad but it was in a plastic container with Deans name on it so he placed it on the counter as well. After some searching he found a wooden tray and placed the food on that. He started walking towards the door, when he suddenly stopped and looked down at the tray. Didn’t people eat their food warm? Yes, he was pretty sure of that, he turned around and his eyes fell on the microwave.

“Dean, are you awake? I made you breakfast, I didn’t really know what you wanted or how to do it so I picked…ah, well…everything I could find in the fridge…”Castiel was nervously rambling, talking fast, trying to explain every little step. Dean could hear a voice in the distance. Someone was talking, about…? about breakfast? He tried to understand the wave of words that poured over him. Who was talking? Was it Castiel? Yes, he finally could make out that it was the angel talking. “…and also, i microwaved your salad ”Castiel said with a hint of pride in his voice “I’m gonna need you to shut the fuck up for a few minutes so I can wake up” Dean said yawning stretching in the bed. The angel fell silent. Dean turned his head towards the angel and grinned, last nights memories coming back to him. Castiel was sitting at the head of the bed with a tray in his lap, Dean sat up beside him. “Oh, you made…breakfast?” Dean smiled at the strange mix of eatable things Castiel had brought “yes, I did…don’t know if I did good thou…” he said shyly. Dean looked from the tray up to the angel and back again. “It looks wonderful, all though…we don’t usually heat our salad, but maybe you will start a trend?” He laughed softly and took the tray from Castiel, placing it on the nightstand beside him. Castiel watched him do it, his left eyebrow raised “Did you not want breakfast?” he tilted his head slightly to the right as he asked the question. Dean, turned around with a mischievous twinkle in his eye as he leaned in to give the angel a soft kiss. “You know I love me some food…”he continued kissing Castiel with more passion as he moved so he sat in the angels lap, the angels response was immediate. Castiels hands trailing his spine from his shoulders and down to his naked back…”but I think it can wait…”