#lovers in reverse meaning… YEA…

[lavendermin]

the lovers, reversed | stellaron hunter sunday

pairing | sunday x fem!reader

wc | 1.6k

genre | angst, one sided love, unrealized feelings

warnings | mdni, alcohol mention, brief mention of sex, blood, wounds, unhealthy relationship, spoiler I guess if sunday really does end up being a stellaron hunter (have not yet played 2.3)

Fresh wounds, a few gashes. Nothing he couldn't treat. Because you wouldn't have anyone else though Firefly has always offered.

"Hold still," Sunday quietly instructs as steady hands work quickly to disinfect and dress unsightly marred skin.

You wince and clutch the sheets until your knuckles turn white. The pain was never easy, but a consequence of your recklessness nonetheless.

Under deft fingers you're all skin, no shame. Not when it's him.

Another whimper you can't suppress escapes your lips, and maybe it finally breaks something in him because you hear him sigh quietly. With his teeth he swiftly pulls off one of his gloves and holds it to your lips.

"Bite down on this," he instructs, voice calm and level. "There's still debris in one of the gashes. I have to take them out one by one."

You can only nod, not registering much else as the pain has your vision tunneling. It's another twenty minutes as he tries to work as quickly as possible. It takes everything to keep his composure despite your muffled cries of discomfort.

"This should have been done in the medical wing." Sunday's reprimand has little to no bite as he clears the medical supplies from the coffee table he had pulled up from across your room.

Your breath is weak and shaky, but still a gentle thing he's used to. "Too bright in there. Makes me feel like a lab rat within those white walls."

"Smells too clean?" he chuckles. Something he can't help around you more recently. There's an innocent and peculiar way you view things. Much like–

Sunday shuts the cabinet in your bathroom a bit harsher than he intended. He can't think of her... not right now. It would only bring emotions he didn't need to process—couldn't process at the moment.

There's red on his hands, on his clothes, staining his once pristine gloves. The awful metallic smell feels like it’s burned into his nostrils—a nauseating mix of crimson and the strong smell of sterilizers as he cleans the tools. His hands work on their own under the running water of your sink, almost out of body as his mind wanders. There’s a slight tremble he catches. Pathetic, he thinks, unable to keep it together in such a dire time.

The 'script' did not mention anything of a necessary death, but of course it would never detail wounds or misfortunes in detail. Some of those just come with the job. And sometimes he would feel a bubbling anger at the twisted fates that often befell you. But he knows it's a spiral that leaves him down a foggy road, one he shouldn't tread on.

Still, you're alive, and he's here. And for now, that's enough.

Your strained voice pulls him back to his body. Back to the present with a clearer head.

Right. The painkillers.

Sunday is quickly back by your side, pushing the small pill past your lips and lifting your face gently to give you water.

"You forgot," you tease despite your hoarse voice.

And those golden eyes you love dearly can't even bear to look at you as he sits next to you on the bed. There's no response other than a halfhearted hum he gives you. You know he didn't forget, and his lack of correction knowing how matter-of-fact he is only further sinks your heart.

But you don't get to tell your heart who to love.

The now-wrinkled glove he gave you is placed next to his leg. "Sorry I messed up. I'll buy you a new pair."

"Thank you..."

"You're wel-"

"You should say ‘thank you’. For the gesture. But don't apologize for the inevitable from missions. What's done is done," Sunday interrupts, voice firm. A little cold.

"I-" You're cut off as he grabs your wrist, his eyes unfocused as he looks at the ground.

"If you had done as I said– You could have gone missing. A lot of things could have gone wrong. Don't use yourself as bait. If anything happens to me, you escape by any means necessary. Understand?"

The grip is a little less than comfortable and you can only nod. Obedient only if it was his words that commanded. It brought a feeling he didn't want to describe rushing through his chest. The way your eyes looked at him—a mix of fear and blind adoration. It made him nauseous to consider himself worthy of such affection.

The morals of why he kept you by his side—of why he sought you during moments of his own damned weakness... He would dwell on that another time. If his morals were in a slow decline, perhaps he would even turn to burn the words stuck in his throat with the liquid he once detested and swore would never stain his lips. The liquid courage might bring him tumbling into your arms, an eagerness to be held and soothed for the sin he feels tainted with.

That maybe in his drunken stupor with his face buried in your neck and his throbbing frustration filling you up, he would realize even in nothingness, there is you. Always you.

A rebound. A close second. A replacement.

Sunday subconsciously has been latching onto you. It’s something he doesn’t remember starting, something he can’t stop nor explain. You, who are like an injured little dove to him, easily hurt and predictable in seeking comfort with his presence.

At first he firmly tried to keep his distance, remain cordial. But now… You provide him some psychological need to keep his same routine from before or have some semblance of familiarity amidst this new path he's been set on. This relationship was just something platonic, he swears by this. Just an innate need to protect and guide you since you were also a clumsy new recruit.

You couldn't help it—falling for him. Slowly being consumed by an infatuation that morphed into a hopeful yearning that filled your chest with a syrupy thickness of strong emotions you were inexperienced with.

And Sunday was at a loss. That wasn't part of the plan. Well…granted he didn't have much of a plan with you. The platonic acquaintance he had built with you was nothing more than for his own gratification. His desperate attempt at normalcy. Someone to fill the void of not being able to see his dear sister.

Still... you're so willing to just give and give and give to him. Anything, for even the slightest possibility of returned affection. Even if you don't outright confess to him, he sees it. In your actions, your speech, your eyes.

Would it truly be so bad to take that which is offered in earnest?

A heart in his hands with nothing to show for it. Lies to himself that this closeness is his attempt to bring you salvation. To settle your heart.

He knows how your script ends, looming over his consciousness. Testing his heart as if he were a newborn god stumbling over his first creation meeting its written demise. Some part of him is too scared to ask if you know it, too. Maybe there's still some naïveté in him if he believes for a second that you don't. A hope that your heart remains innocent and lovely and–

For now Sunday lets you love. It would be a bitter thing to not take the heart you have handed to him.

The painkillers have started to work, your body finally able to sleep for a bit after he changed your soiled sheets from treating your wounds. Before he leaves, Sunday presses his lips to your knuckles and idles for a few moments to watch your steady breathing. Sweat glistens on your brow from the exertion the wound treatment put on your body. Your endurance was nothing to be laughed at.

Sunday doesn't need to turn to know who's outside your door when he leaves.

"Was there something you needed?" The question lacks any warmth.

Kafka chuckles where she leans against the wall, fiddling with a card in her hands. "Here to drop off your compensation for the mission and look after the little lamb," she replies simply, throwing the card to him. He catches it between two fingers. "She lost her phone this past mission so make sure to give her that card for the time being."

Sunday's eyes narrow. "I'm looking after her."

"Poor thing sent me a message asking that I check in on her so she won't bother you. Unless that's a problem?" Her unreadable smile is something Sunday is growing to detest.

"Not necessary. I'll be handling it." His voice is firm, a warning woven into his tone with careful consideration. A natural habit from his years as the head of the Oak Family.

"Really now? If you don't want me looking after her due to trust issues then Bladie can–"

"No." Sunday can feel his heart pounding in his ears, a frustration deep-set in his veins at the pure thought of someone that isn't him near you when you're at your most vulnerable. He wishes he could wipe that smile off Kafka's face. Victim of her teasing again. Remember your composure, a conditioned mind rings. With a clear of his throat, he continues, "No, that won't be necessary. I've already cleared my schedule to ensure her wounds are looked after so there isn't any scarring. I'll take care of it."

Kafka relents and pats his shoulder as she passes him. "Very well, birdie. Sounds like you have our little lamb's heart in your pocket. Or perhaps it's your own?"

Before Sunday can ask her what she means, she's already vanished from his sight. His hand reaches into his jacket pocket when he feels something rigid and pulls out a card he's sure she placed there.

A tarot card depicting a dove perched on a lamb. The lovers.

[roseychains]

How these women fuck (or get fucked) by you

A/n: in a messy situation with some guy rn, my mental health is deteriorating and I have a lot to manage. Idk, except a lot of female oriented content for a little while cuz rn I’m. Yea

C/w: written by a minor!, fem!reader, both sub and dom reader, and all of these warnings go both ways. strap on, oral, fingering, sex toys, lingerie, bondage, marking, scissoring, degradation, exhibitionism, praise, sensory deprivation, temperature play, overstim and edging, role play, hand kink

Featuring: shoko, utahime, and yuki from jjk. Pakunoda, shizuku, and machi from hxh. Misturi and shinobu from demon slayer, and honorable mention yor briar.

Jjk women

Shoko

Purple strap energy. Shoko is a switch but prefers being dom. The only way she’d ever let you take control is if you really want to, but that’s not to say that she takes on a particularly controlling roll either. For her, sex isn’t about labels it’s about making her girlfriend feel good, and herself. The thing that makes her a dom most of the time is the way that she is often the giver, and when you are she still maintains control over the situation.

Definitely smokes while she’s hitting it from the back if you let her. She’d be balls deep in your cunt and have one hand pressed on your back and the other holding a cigar between her lips, turning away to puff out the smoke.

When she goes down on you, she fingers you while she sucks on your clit. She loves watching you get close and your thighs threaten to close around her head.

Speaking of, she needs you to sit on her face. Please. She doesn’t care how heavy you think you are. She will die happily between your thighs, pull her hair too, she will moan.

Double ended dildos are defiantly her favorite toy with you. Throw in a vibrator as well, so your scissoring each other while being penetrated by the same toy and a vibrator between? That’s her favorite thing to do.

Utahime

She’s a switch as well, but she leans to being a sub, a bratty sub. I feel like she’s also a big pillow princess as well, so she prefers to lay back and be at your mercy, not to mention it gets her really turned on when you tell her all the things your going to do to her. She will act bratty to get your attention, to attempt to rile you up in hopes of getting a reaction, getting punished(overstimulated till she cry’s). On the chance she is a dom, I imagine her being a cocky dom now that the tables have finally turned, you’ll be sore for a while.

She looks so good in lingerie, she likes it when you fuck her in it, while you’re wearing some as well. She will constantly talk about it when valentines is coming up, “I sure hope my hot sexy girlfriend doesn’t buy us matching lingerie, that would be so bad I hope that doesn’t happen” (she is a master of reverse psychology)

Being a pillow princess, you’re often the one going down on her. She’s super vocal while you’re eating her out, pulls your hair super hard.

She loves shibari bondage, with silky red ropes gently laced around her body. She doesn’t like normal rope, handcuffs, or tape. Only gentle, pretty silk. To be honest, sex with her is very ascetically pleasing

Yuki

She’s a dom all the way. She is controlling every aspect of your bedroom activity’s, and flawlessly at that. She knows what you want, she knows how you like to be touched, where you’re sensetive, and how to abuse all of that knowledge. Depending on what you prefer, she can either be a mean dom, or a slow romantic lover, or both. She lives to please you, so don’t you move a finger. If you weren’t a pillow princess, you are now.

Dirty talk with her is so good. She says the right things at all the right times, and her smug sexy voice never fails to make you leak through whatever panties you’re wearing.

She will probably at some point bring up the idea of you wearing a vibrator in public and she has the remote. Honestly, she loves seeing you flustered and embarrassed, all the better knowing it’s all her fault.

Wants you to leave marks on her when she fucks you. She wants you to scratch her back, leave red marks that will show in her back-less swim suit the next day, she wears those marks like a badge of honor.

Hxh women

Pakunoda

Service dom vibes. I feel like sex with with her is equally as romantic as it is almost formal. She’s a giver, and dedicated everything she does to your pleasure. With that being said, she is also a brat tamer. So if you act up, except to be bent over her lap and counting each hit. She will give you everything you want, sexually, and expects submission in return.

She’s definitely possessive, and when you go out wearing something revealing she’s making sure she has given you a hickey somewhere on your skin, for when she can’t be with you. But when she can, she has her hand around your waist at all times.

Loves to eat you out slowly so you get needy and start begging for her to finish you off. She will draw it out as long as she can, savoring your taste and reactions, but after a while she will let you cum.

She prefers to fuck you with her fingers as opposed to a strap. She feels like it’s too far away from being her, so she’s rather fuck you with something she has, reminding you that you don’t need any man, or anyone else for that matter.

Shizuku

She’s a sub, but definitely a power bottom. She cannot sit still, and will constantly have her hands on you. Be that pulling your hair while you eat her out, gripping you thighs while she’s going down on you, scratching your back when your fingering her and grabbing your face when you kiss her. Please don’t tie her down. That would make her sad. She just needs something to hold onto.

One of her all time favorite things is riding your strap. Bonus points if you hold her hands, even more if you hold her hips and thrust into her at her same pace, she will literally ride you till she’s crying, panting, and exhausted.

She’s extremely vocal. Even when you’re gently teasing or prepping her, she will let out the most loud pornographic moans, it’s almost like she wants someone else to hear.

She would find it exciting to do risky things, like fucking while the troupe is in the other room. Your have to cover her mouth with your hand or they really will hear.

Machi

She’s a switch because she can do it all. I imagine her being a rough dom, tying you up with her nen stitches and fucking you with her fingers hard and fast. She’s so strong, and can easily manhandle you to her will. She will also choke you. When she’s a sub, I imagine her being kinda shy, she who has always had control of the situation, that control taken away. At the same time though she really loves it, it’s a nice change of place.

Humiliation/degradation with her is soooo good. Her voice is commanding and strict, her holding you down with one hand and fingering you with the other, all while whispering in your ear how slutty you are makes you cum in no time.

When she’s the sub, please praise and encourage her. I imagine her being shy and nervous, Esspecially if it’s her first time being this way. She definitely has to get used to it, learning to let go for a bit but it’s worth it in the end with how good you make her feel.

Sensory deprivation and temperature play both ways are thrilling for her. Either you, tied up and blindfolded, not knowing what she’s going to next, dripping hot wax on your body then rubbing ice over it the next, or her in that same place, she likes it all.

Demon slayer women

Misturi

A shy sub. She doesn’t want to have any control, she just wants to feel good and for you to as well. Probably one of the less kinky people on this list, but she’s open to try anything. But I imagine her mostly enjoying simple stuff, just touching you and you touching her is enough. I feel like she also likes being tied up, nothing crazy just wrist binds, she likes the element of suprise from being restrained.

Sex with her is always soft and gentle. She doesn’t like anything rough or mean, so everything you do is filled with praise and adoration. So even when tears prick in the corners of her eyes, they are pleasure tears.

Kissing 24/7 during sex. She thinks she will die if her lips aren’t on yours at any given moment. She will literally make out with you until you’re both panting and gasping for air, but after one breath she’s going back in for more.

She is super sensitive, and cums from even the lightest touches. She secretly wants you to take advantage of this, please, make her see stars from being between her lush thighs. She just loves it when you go down on her.

Shinobu

She’s a switch but leaning dom. I get the feeling that she lacks experience, but unlike others that doesn’t make her not want to take the lead. I imagine her to be somewhat condescending in bed, with the names she calls you and how she touched you, like you’re just a dumb little girl that she can do with whatever she pleases. However, if she were to be a sub it would be for your pleasure, and she probably would be pretty quiet and shy.

Roleplay with her is big. It doesn’t matter what, she’s down for anything. Predator prey, doctor patient, criminal officer, you’ve done em all. She really gets in character and in her opinion it’s a fun addition to your already more than satisfying sex. She likes watching how you react to different things.

She’s super possessive but she won’t ever act on it in public, she won’t fight or yell, but the second your undressed her mouth is all over your neck, biting, sucking, and kissing. She will probably also have you wear her perfume and clothes, she wants to leave her mark but steadily.

She has a massive hand fetish, yours and her own, but she esspecially likes it when you choke her. No matter who is what role, she likes the pressure that is gentle enough to make her breathing slow down with no real harm, it gets her excited.

Honorable mention

Yor briar

I’m really conflicted on this one. Cuz on one hand, I imagine her being a super shy sub (exhibit A, when loid tried to kiss her) but on the other hand, she’s an assassin and super scary and intimidating so she would maintain that demeanor in bed. Overall, I think she’s just happy to do whatever you want. She doesn’t have much experience so if you’re happy so is she.

When she’s the dom, I can imagine her getting into bondage and roleplay. With enough convincing you could probably even get her to pretend she’s on a mission to apprehend you and get information out of you… a different way.

On the contrary, when you’re on top of her she’s extremely flustered and covering her face. She squirms a lot and is super sensetive to your touch, so even the smallest things get a reaction out of her. That being said, she fucking loves it when you use your strap on her, and hold her hips down.

[uchihaharlot]

Okay, so, I went to sleep when I suddenly got an idea about headcanon with Madara. What "if his dear lover god kidnapped by other village or clan idk"? You can use Madara from founders era.

Your dear anon.🫶

Nonny, lol, are you trying to start the next generational war? One that goes for several decades? …ok. (ps I am so so so sorry this took forever, I honestly just forget or am overwhelmed with work and this so so so short 🥲)

SFW; short hc for Madara rescuing his babe

Yea no. This is treason. On his life so help Madara, the earths going to be shattered as he spends endless days/weeks searching for her, however long it takes. Eliciting the help of every single one of his allies—in fact Hashi is one of the strongest soldiers under his command. The whole entirety of Konoha is on a war path because it’s easier than the village being reduce to a decimal under his thumb.

Lawd whoever had a gonads to steal his woman, better have good reason. Which wouldn’t matter since no reason will ever be reason enough. Madara sees red when he comes home and sees that their house is in disarray. She flought her kidnappers at least but it was fruitless. Which means they had numbers over her.

He knows it wasn’t Hashirama or Tobirama. Neither man stupid enough to do such a thing, as for who it was. Kami help them, they have awoken a man who knows no bounds, feels so weakness when met with this level of anger. Thankfully, its not long until he does find her and her captors.

Madara is not a merciful man when crossed, despite his comrades pleas (and his lover's), retribution is definite. Immense and painful, unrelenting to the point that if you called him crazy before, to do so now would be an understatement. It's said that his mangekyo sharingan allowed him the ability to reverse time (A/N in the video games 🤓 yes I had to google), with that being said. No one was certain until, when on the brink of death, her captor is nearly born again and in excruciating detail, relives their torture. Over and over, this is the only way to pacify him. No other form of punishment would suffice the level of terror his precious lover endured. I wouldn't put it past Madara to imprison this unsavory individual for eternity, just for his personal pleasure. A reminder to all exactly how far the depths of an Uchiha's adoration reaches.

[lunathebee]

Pairing: The moon boys x fem!reader

Warning: fluff, HE, nothing alarming

A/n: This was requested by @spicydonut25. I hope you like it and ty for being so patient with me 💖💖

Summary: What if the moon boys lose the (very important) necklace you gave them?

For the past three days, Steven has been wearing his jacket quite a bit often. Of course it's his favorite jacket to go to work, but he also wears it at home now, and even buttoned up?

Y/n doesn't think much of it; she has asked him a few times due to curiosity, and each time Steven has answered with a different reason: "It's quite chilly, innit?", "Oh, I forgot to take it off haha", "I just like wearin' it love"; and so many more.

Although Steven's habit is certainly questionable, not to mention weird...But hey, it doesn't hurt anyone right?, and so Y/n paid no mind to it, until one day...

===☾︎ ☾︎ ☾︎===

"Gosh how long do I have to wear the jacket Marc??" "Shut it, and keep looking, I think I just saw something sparkly" "You're such an ars-"

"Steven?? What are you doing?"

"OUCH! Y/n?!" Steven rubbed his head after bumping it into the bed frames; he hadn't expected Y/n to come back from work so soon. And worse, she catches him crawling under the bed like a crazy man. What explanation can Steven give now?

"Be careful, babe, are you okay?" Y/n rushes to his side, looking for injury on his head like a mother to her child; the action makes Steven giggle, while Y/n keeps fumbling over how he could have a serious headache from it.

"I'm okay, I'm okay. Why are you home so early today?" Steven gives Y/n a quick kiss after asking.

"Well, I finished work early, but seriously, what are you doing under the bed? Did you lose something?"

A seemingly innocent question from Y/n made Steven sweat bullets; he did lose something, a very important do-not-lose thing... The only thing that has made him suffer from the heat of the jacket for the past three days: the couple necklace!

Steven could see Y/n still wear it proudly around her neck, and here he is, loosing it somewhere neither he nor Marc, not even Jake, can remember.

"Are you staring at my chest?" Y/n asked with a smug smile; she just wanted to tease her lover a bit, and it seems like her plan worked perfectly.

"No! I mean—I didn't mean to—whoa whOA" Steven tried to swat Y/N's hands away when she tried to unbutton his jacket with a seductive gaze.

She can't know about it! - He is still so shy

Two different thoughts were held at the same time by two different people. One tried to grip onto the jacket like his life depended on it, and one tried to take it off with a questioning look on her face.

Eventually Y/n give up and stop tugging at Stevn's shirt, maybe she shouldn't push him too far; if the roles were reversed, she wouldn't feel comfortable with it either. "Babe... I'm sorry, I shouldn't do that."

"It's okay... I'm just...promised me you won't be mad at me, yea?" Steven doesn't want to hide the secret any longer, and despite Marc yelling at him they still have a chance to find it. Steven unbuttoning his jacket reveals the "horror" beneath it.

Y/n still hasn't noticed what is missing yet; she just thinks it is funny how Steven is holding his jacket open like Superman. "Pff, what are you doing now?"

Steven's shoulder dropped, and he let out a long sigh. "I lost the necklace you gave-"

"YOU WHAT"

"You talk to her Marc!" "Ugh, I told you not to tell her!"

"Baby, calm down. I'm still looking for it." Marc tried to calm Y/n down after fronting; he is not good at this kind of thing; usually it's Steven, maybe even Jake.

Y/n let out a long fake cry and let herself fall backward, lying on the floor with her arms spread out. "Marc, what have you doneee?"

"Hey hey, how could you accuse me like that? What about Jake and Steven?" Marc said while joining Y/n on the floor. He is lying on his side, propped up on one elbow, with his hand supporting his head.

The action made Y/n turn her head to face Marc with a pout; she wants to say "As if you're not the one who never keeps things tidy." But judging from the "puppy dog eyes" look on her lover's face, Y/n decides it is not worth saying. Instead, the woman stood up and went looking for her boots and coat.

"Wait, where are you going?" Marc stood up and followed Y/n, his face showing clear confusion—is she going to leave him just because of a necklace? "I told you I can still find it, babe, please don't go.."

Marc reached out and held Y/n's arm, stopping her from going anywhere. But to his surprise, she said he can come with her too, but where exactly?

"Oh, c'mon, we are going to get you guys something new to remember me." Y/n gives Marc a smile before pulling him with her to go outside.

===☾︎ ☾︎ ☾︎===

"WOW! It turned out great! Look at us!" Steven exclaimed while looking at the photo strip on both of his hands.

Turns out Y/n have found a new nearby photo booth when she goes home early today, and because her lover already lost the necklace somewhere, Y/n decide it is best for them to take some photos, that way all three boys can have something of their own.

Steven is very happy with all the funny and cute filters the photo booth offers to add to the photos, meanwhile Marc decides to keep it lowkey with some small kissing and a stoic smile; even Jake front today to have pics with Y/n (which make her flustered and surprised with how flirty he is).

"What do you think about our new 'couple' thing?" Y/n smiles at Steven, waiting for his answer.

"IT IS THE BEST! Marc and Jake also said they loved it a lot"

Y/n watched Steven carefully put all the photos neatly into his pocket. His face must hurt from all the smiling and grinning today.

"I'm glad.... I was sad that you guys lost the necklace, but to the point of hiding it and being scared that I would leave? You know I would never...I love you more than that, okay?"

Steven feels like his face is getting redder and redder from hearing that. "I love you too. Let's go home now, yeah?"

And so, the couple exchanges a kiss before walking back to their home, hands in hands.💕

[nulltune]

any rp wishlist ??

I HAVE A LOT!!!! omg... screams into my hands this is a heck of a question anon- TYSM!! ❤️❤️ i have a wishlist tag too actually- but i don't post much in it because tbh all interactions feed me so well...... i love hakuno dearly you see (live lynn reaction: 🥺🥹😩🫶💗) and she's always interacting with all kinds of interesting muses so tis a guaranteed fun time 🥳 and also like. hakuno as a character is defined as a nobody with nothing so you can expect pretty anything to be a new experience 2 her :,) OK BUT YEA BACK TO UR Q! WHEN IT COMES TO WISHLIST THO HRMGHH that's a tough one..... cuz i have sm!!! so off the top of my head:

this is rlly general but oooo i want hakuno to go to all sorts of places! she is already someone who is so curious, exploring the world to try to find a place in it. spoiler alert she doesn't but i digress! imagine your muse showing her a place they like... or a by-chance encounter where hakuno stumbles on their little secret spot.... hakuno would be pretty inquisitive because she can't imagine having such an attachment to any place, but i think it'd be real interesting to explore! and also- your muse and hakuno going on a trip somewhere... sightseeing and having fun together mayhaps,, the possibilities are endless so i can't really specify but i just think it's neat! 🥺

"i'd die for you" "i'll live for you" "let's live together" "let's die together" <- whatever those lines got going on!!! not all of them at once ofc (unless things happens and they all apply at some point 👁👁✨️) but just whatever genre this is..... life and death are interesting topics to explore with hakuno – she's someone who can understand what it's like to want to disappear, but at the same time she's someone who's afraid of death. and she wants to love so badly but has no reason to </3 so i wanna explore more of that in general !!! i wanna see her interact muses who share that same mindset... muses who think completely differently.... let them explore what their purpose is... their reason to live... and all that!

tragic love is such a Big Need for meee, i'm a sucker for them!!! and i really think it's so perfect for hakuno!!! i hope everyone knows by now that i love the theme of love for my hakuno 🫶 and like- imagine finally understanding and finding love when you thought you never could, only to lose it... unrequited love? a doomed love story? there are so many ways to go about it, and who the other person might be makes it so much more interesting too, and i just crave it!!

hakuno and a muse working together for something- a relationship founded on ??? like, they just happen to meet and their goals just somewhat aligned so they're sticking together for practical reasons or just circumstances!! will they get to know each other better and come out of it with a good experience? will they butt heads but decide to bear with it until their respective goals are accomplished? idk but something about it intrigues me! i'm really interested in having like a whole storyline happen tbh 🥺 it'd be fun to see how much the relationship changes at the end of things y'know!

i'm gonna need more antagonistic dynamics too tbh.... she is absolutely going to be as polite and nice as she is to any other person because c'mon... it's Hakuno. but! i feel like there's a biiig sense of distance that comes with having this sort of dynamic with her. as we have seen in canon for example, hakuno's really frikkin aware of their status as enemies with other character- she's always saying stuff like "even though we're enemies?" and not understanding why'd be nice to her when she's their enemy... stuff like that!! i mean, enemies to friends or enemies to lovers is def not out of the question ((ФωФ)✨️ ...) but it'd be so fun to see the development!! which i guess is the appeal of those dynamics in da first place !

i love character development ofc but i have always been thinking about- how about reverse character development ?! 😳 hakuno is a suuper interesting character to me because- well, it's like a white sheet of paper! it's blank! i feel like there are soo many directions her character could go and i think it'd be so fun to explore! characters who bring out the worst in each other maybe?? enable each others' bad habits?? and oh boy it'd hurt so much on hakuno's part because she wants to be better and is always wanting the best for others so like (: IT COULD BE FUN METHINKS..!

letter writing threads!! i feel like you can tell a lot about a muse by the kind of letter they write 👁👁✨️ having hakuno write down her thoughts and feelings into paper just sounds super interesting to okok- i'd imagine her letters sounding more like very formal reports tbh 💀 but i think it could be so fun and a really neat way to really get the Insight(TM) on da muse!

speaking of the letter writing tho- something related to arts and humanities! drawing? music? writing? sculpting? dance? anything and everything creative pls. hakuno's way of thinking is very logical so i think she struggles with understanding things that don't really have a solid factual answer, but that's also what makes it so interesting! art can really touch people's hearts too and that's the kind of thing hakuno needs desperately 🥹 even if she can't fully understand it right now ! your muse showing hakuno their creations maybe?? bonus points if their works say a lot about them as a person or means a lot of them!

i'm a sucker for childhood friends so i want that for hakuno too 🤧✨️ !! it doesn't have to be friends in specific tho- i just think there's something special about knowing someone when they were younger :thonk: kids tend to be more honest i guess? and i mean hakuno still is, but for better or worse, the hakuno we now know keeps the "bad" parts of herself hidden away while actively trying to be the person other people need – a younger hakuno wouldn't have that mindset yet methinks! BUT YEA BACK TO WHAT I WAS SAYING 😳😳 it's fun to see how that could affect the dynamic especially when they meet later on!

OH AND immortal & mortal is a staple! hakuno could work as both tho... it rlly depends on the verse because her mortality is Weird(TM) actually- but i still think both concepts would be very fun!! >:3c with her as a mortal, it'd be Neat for her to want to be remembered because that's asking for a lot when her entire life is probably like a mere blink in the eyes of an immortal </3 and with her as an immortal, i just like the idea of her finding happiness after possibly years and years of loneliness but also being aware that happiness is very much temporary </3

I FEEL LIKE THESE R MORE DYNAMICS AND THEMES THAN SPECIFIC SCENARIOS BC LIKE i wuv...... and i luv scenarios and situations too ofc but i can't rlly specify bc they're all so neat 2 me.!!! your muse and hakuno could literally just go to mcdonald's and i'd be havin a blast writing it GVSMCBSMDH

[celamoon]

are requests open? because imagine saiki with a dumb childhood friend (to lovers? 👀) who's just a little too naive. she's caught him using his powers before and just went oh, and he's pretty sure her brain didn't even process what he was doing. and she attracts so many boys but she's just clueless so now saiki has to shoo them away from her <3

Anon your brain is astronomically huge I’m in love with this concept.

To clear things up though I do take requests (suggestions) but I won’t always write them since some make me go bRR and others don't really speak to me so it depends on what it is. (also because I'm not technically a writing blog pfft)

You wrote the reader as a she so I’m going to use female pronouns for this one. I hope I did your request justice!

Warnings: none, just fluff

Saiki was absolutely terrified when you first walked in on him using his powers in second grade. I mean it wasn’t like Akechi didn’t figure it out, but you straight up walked in on Saiki while he blew the classroom to pieces. He was about to erase your memory of the incident before you had tilted your head cutely with a pout. 

“Did someone break in?” You rushed off to grab the first aid kit to try and help the others.

Kusuo read your thoughts to see if you suspected that he was a psychic and the only thing he got from your thoughts were 'oh, I guess Akechi was right in some way'

Saiki had watched you put a bandaid on the wounds and secretly helped you heal the others. No one believed you when you said the classroom was blown up the next day, I mean it was like someone reversed time on it! Nothing was scattered or anything else of the sort!

Saiki also transferred away that time. You were kinda sad, you wanted to befriend the kid who was standing in the middle of the room after the supposedly ‘break in’.  You were pleased when you moved shortly after with your parent’s job. So you ended up at Saiki’s school again.

That was a while ago though, both of you have grown by now. You had followed Saiki around each time he moved, you were convinced that was the universe telling you to become best friends with him. (It wasn’t, you’d later on find out that Saiki had used mind control so you could follow each school he went to).

“Kuu!” Saiki looks away from the passing car and nods at you. 

Both of you were in your second year of high school now. Saiki hadn’t changed much other than the glasses and growth spurt. You on the other hand? You had grown impressively. You were prettier, taller, and for some odd reason the universe blessed you with an ideal body. This meant trouble.

“Did you wait long?” You close the gate to your place as Saiki shook his head.

‘Same as always,’

“Ah, alright then,” You hum. “Anything new happen?”

‘I literally saw you less than ten hours ago Y/n.’

“So? Lots of things can happen in ten hours! For all we know you could’ve travelled to Kyoto and back!” You grinned. Saiki glared your way before continuing to walk.

“You’re so boring now Kuu-chan,” You grumble. Saiki chooses to ignore your words as he watches Nendou and the others join the two of you. Soon enough, you guys are at school.

“Ah, another letter,” You slip out your shoes to change into and set the letter into your bookbag. You head over to your desk and pull it out from the bag.

“Who is it from this time?” Kaidou looks at the letter on the desk and you hum.

“I think… ah it says someone wants to meet up with me on the rooftop,” you read.

‘Good grief, I thought you made it clear that you weren’t interested last time’ Saiki peers over your shoulder, caging you in, and you jump slightly.

“I mean it wouldn’t hurt actually going…”

“Y/n’s getting a boyfriend?” Yumehara joins your group at the shoe lockers and you shake your head.

“Someone wrote me a letter saying they want to meet up,” You show her the letter and the girl inwardly sighs. ‘How come Y/n-chan was able to pull people so easily and I couldn’t even find a good boy to date!’

‘That’s because you’re too obsessive’ Saiki reminds inwardly.

“You’re going?”

“Don’t worry! I, the jet black wings, can accompany you to meet up with whoever this is!” Kaidou offers.

“I’ll come with Nendou if you don’t want anything creepy to happen,” Kuboyasu smiles.

“A-ah it’s alright! I’ll just bring Kuu with me,” You smile.

“You sure?” 

“Mhm!” You grin. “I’ll be fine with Kuu,”

Speaking honestly, you’re quite nervous. You had gotten letters before, but none of them actually asked you to meet up. Most of them could be read, and then Saiki would offer you to toss them out in some way. Your favourite was when he used his pyrokinesis to burn it in his hand, he was always helping you reject people.

“Offu,”

“Good morning Teruhashi offu!” 

“Good morning everyone!” Teruhashi smiles, flowers bloomed in the room because of that.

“Good morning Teruhashi-san!” You grinned as she walked over. 

“Good morning Y/n-chan! Oh is that a letter?” Teruhashi notices the envelope in your hands. ‘Why did she get a letter? Is she being confessed to? Ugh! No calm down Teruhashi, you’re a pretty perfect girl. You don’t need to be jealous, it’s just one letter’

“Yeah… It tells me to meet up with them at the roof,” You mumble. “Teruhashi-san how do you turn people down?”

“A-ah?”

“You’re always being confessed to right? How do you do it?” Your eyes glimmer and Saiki grimaces. Out of all the people you admire, you decide to admire Teruhashi. It wasn’t like she was rude, but it was more like she was fake.

“A-ah well…” Teruhashi panics inwardly as she looks for an answer. ‘I mean none of these high school boys can match up to me. Sure Saiki-san makes me feel different but seriously he doesn’t even have an income of 40 million yen… what do I tell her?!’

“It’s ok if you’re not too sure either Teruhashi-san,” You smile. “Sometimes we reject people so naturally that we don’t even realize it,”

“A-ah yea… sorry it’s just I don’t get confessed to that much…”

“Ah right!” You grin. “You’re better than everyone here so it would make sense that no one dares to approach you!”

“H-hUH? That’s not true!” Teruhashi flushes red at your compliment and you smile.

The rest of the school day passes as usual, and soon the final bell rings. You pack your bags and wander to the roof to meet up with the supposed secret admirer. Saiki walks beside you, ready to kill someone if you asked. 

“Uh you can stay here, I’ll call you if he tries anything,” You open the door to the roof and Saiki is forced to use clairvoyance on you.

“H-Hi! Y/n-san, uh I’m Hito-kun from class 2… will you go out with me?” The boy bows and you’re thrown off guard.

“Ah, Hito-kun there’s a bit of an issue, uh I already have a crush on someone…” You half lie. Sure you thought Saiki was cute, but he was off limits since you know, best friend things.

“A-ah? Is it Saiki-san? I’m sorry! I thought you thought of him as a friend so I took the chance-“

“I-It’s ok! Kuu’s my best friend, it’s just I’m suspicious that he’s aromatic so uh-“ Saiki slams the door to the roof open and you panic. You forgot he was there. The boy who was previously confessing to you flushes red and rushes off with an apology.

“Kuu! I- uh, you heard nothing…?”

‘Y/n.’

“I know you aren’t interested in me or anything but like feelings work like that you know? Ugh I just ruined our friendship didn’t I…” You shrink onto the floor and Saiki walks up to you, crouching down to meet you eye to eye.

‘Y/n.’

“What…” you mumble.

‘I… I’m not too sure what I feel around you, but I think I like you too,’

“Nice joke Kusuo, sure made me feel so much better,” you grumble, looking away. “I may be dumb but I’m not that dumb,”

‘I’m not joking,’ Saiki forces you to meet his gaze. “I like you too.”

You pause when he actually speaks. 

‘Did I kill you?’

“Kuu you can’t just say that and not expect me to break down!” You shove your face into your knees and Saiki smiles.

‘I’ll keep reminding you until you’re convinced, and I’ll take care of you until you know.’

“Then I’ll stick by you until this endless loop ends,” You smile, holding up your pinky.

You two sealed a promise that day.

[kelieah]

lover boy (arvin russell x reader)

summary: a group of boys kept picking on you and arvin’s relationship, and you knew just what to do to shut them up

word count: 1.2k

warnings: sexual themes, foreplay, language, no spoilers and doesn’t follow the plot!

edited: tbh idk what the fuck this is but enjoy ig lol

a/n: i can’t get enough of arvin basjhdbsd, so for some reason i can write a one-shot but not finish a chapter </3

masterlist 

It became a daily routine for Arvin to pick you up from high school. You loved the adrenaline rush of sprinting out of class first thing when the bell rings, making your ways down the halls and out the door. Seeing his pretty face waiting in that damn car of his erupted butterflies in your stomach every single time.

He glances over at you with a small smirk on his lips, pushing the door open and taking another puff of his cigarette.

“Hi there, pretty boy,” you breathe out and rush into his car, sitting down. You close the door and lean towards him, connecting your lips with his.

He smiles against your lips and cups your cheek, kissing you back. “Hey there, doll. Y’ hungry?” 

“For you? Always,” you place your bag down, sending a wink his way.

He rolls his eyes, disregarding the way his heart jumped out of his chest at your tease. “Y’ know what I mean, babe. Wanna head to the diner?” he asks as he hands you his cigarette. You nod and take a puff, flicking off some ash out of the window.

“Yea yea, of course,” you smile and lean back, furrowing your brows as you realize he had another black eye. You sit up and place a hand on his jaw before he drove off.

“What?” he glances at you, licking his lips.

 “Darlin’, what’s this,” you mutter and gently brush your fingers against his bruise.

“It’s nothin’, don’t worry,” he shakes his head and starts the car again.

“Arvin,” you hold his chin and make him look at you, a stubborn expression upon your face. 

He sighs heavily and grumbles out his words, “Just the same damn low lifes picking on me because they saw me come to y’ house with some flowers.”

Arvin was always known as the outcast who could never get it and you were always known as the church girl who’s life was dedicated to God. Both were wrong. Arvin was never the same after he met you, he would’ve never thought that you’d be the one to take his virginity. He wasn’t complaining but from then on, he’d never judge a person by their looks. Turns out, you hated your religion just as much as he did. You were no typical church girl, that’s for sure.

“Jesus fuck, can’t you do anything without getting picked on? I’ll fucking show them-” you pull away from his face, about to exit the car.

You instantly melt as he places his hand on your thigh, sitting you back down. “Sweet heart, y’ know damn well you can’t take on three boys like ‘em.”

“I-I know, but damnit Arvin. It’s like you can’t even breathe without them wanting to beat your ass,” you huff and glance over at him.

He admires your passion and stubbornness, it’s two of the many things he loved about you. “Remember?”

“Wait for the right time,” you mutter in memory of every single time Arvin had told you that saying he learned from his own daddy.

“They’ll get what’s comin’ for them one day. If anything, they’re probably just jealous that they don’t have what I got,” he teases and squeezes your thigh.

“O-Oh shush you,” you blush and bite your lip, looking away.

“Let’s head on to the diner now, yeah?” he asks, driving out of your school parking lot.

“Sounds good to me,” you smile at the feeling of him caressing your leg.

Not too long after, the two of you arrive at the diner and pull towards the front to park.

You and Arvin immediately tense at the sight of the three boys exiting the diner, their obnoxious laughing and yelling filling your ears.

“Look who pulled up, damn! Is that lover boy and his little prude bitch!?” one of them insult, pointing at the two of you.

“Shit, I thought them boys are usually at the drive-in. Why the hell are they here?” he mutters, about to put his car in reverse to leave.

You send them a piercing glare as they continue to stand in front of his car, harrassing you both. “I don’t-” you mutter and instantly jump when a piece of cream pie was thrown at your window.

“Here’s the only kind of cream pie you’ll be getting, fucking loser,” another one of the boys spit, wiping their hand on the back of their jeans. Arvin clenches his jaw and grips on his wheel harshly.

“Let’s get out of here,” he scoffs about to back up until he heard your seatbelt click. “Doll, don’t you dare go out there-” he quickly looks over at you, his eyebrows knit with concern. 

You roll up your skirt a bit and sit on his lap, “Can I do this?” you murmur against his lips and wrap your arms around his neck.

“S-Shit I mean, y-yeah but they’re right there- mmph-” he blushes as you bring yourself closer to him and smash his lips against yours.

“I don’t give a fuck, I’ll show them ‘em much of a lover boy you can be,” you say in between kisses and smirk against his lips as you feel him grown beneath you.

“Holy shit!” you hear one them gasp as they notice you and Arvin’s heated make out.

“G-Goddamn, Y-Y/n,” he grunts as you roll your hips against him, your heat brushing onto his.

“Yeah?” you breath out and thread your fingers through his hair, reconnecting your lips with his.

“Mhm, f-fucking hell,” he groans into your mouth when you palm him through his jeans.

You quickly roll down his window and grind yourself down onto him, making him let out a loud moan.

The three boys instantly shut up and begin to back away, “L-Let’s get the fuck out of here.”

“Y-Yeah,” one them agrees and they all walk off to their car, driving away.

You grin mischievously in triumph and slip your tongue into Arvin’s mouth, continuing to move against him.

“Baby d-doll, they’re gone,” he chokes and places his hands on your hips, holding you down for a moment.

“I know,” you exhale and lean your forehead against his. You give him a look and he easily catches your drift.

“You wanna go to our spot?” he breathlessly chuckles, his breath fanning your lips.

“Please,” you pout and peck his lips, climbing off his lap.

As soon as you both drive into a forest that you both called your “spot” near his house, you were back on his lap. Needy kisses and touches being exchanged here and there.

“Watching, seeing and feeling you take over l-like that darlin’, fuck. The things you do to me,” he mutters lowly.

“I had to shut them up somehow,” you giggle and leave gentle kisses down his neck.

“You, my love. Surprise me everyday,” he cups your face and presses a kiss against your forehead.

“I know.”

“Can’t believe you got me harder than a rock and didn’t finish me off though,” he pouts, causing you to throw back your head and laugh loudly. 

“Why do you think I asked you to drive here?”

“To talk- oh.”

“Yeah.”

“W-Well shit, you should’ve told me e-earlier,” he scrambles beneath you and slides off his shirt.

“Oh, lover boy,” you roll your eyes and bite your lip, bringing your lips towards his once again.

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[drabbles-mc]

Breaking In

Bishop Losa x F!Reader

Request by @garbinge​: So I did some prompt searching today and found this and thought about maybe a little best friends to lovers trope with Bishop: “look, i know that we rarely agree on things, and i know that you're not happy about how i choose to do things, but you're here, and i love you for it.” anddddd “are you gonna pull the trigger?”

Warnings: language, angst (with a happy ending), Bishop being the stubborn man that he is

Word Count: 1.9k

A/N: I haven’t shown Bishop some love in a while and I really liked these prompts for him. Hope y’all enjoy! xo

Join my group-chat here: (X)

Bishop Losa Taglist: @masterlistforimagines @sincerelyasomebody @sadeyesgf @thesandbeneathmytoes @tomhardydallasstarsgirl @multiyfandomgirl40 @sillygoose6969 @queenbeered @louisianalady @gemini0410 @paintballkid711 @chibsytelford @yourwonkywriter @sesamepancakes @arveeee @mayans-sauce @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @plentyoffandoms @georgiaaintnopeach @twistnet @themoonandthewicked @bucky-iss-bae @encounterthepast @rosieposie0624 @mylittlelonelyappreciationtoo @mijop @xladymacbethx @holl2712 @lakamaa12 @blessedboo​ @kkim120​ @toni9​ @shadow-of-wonder​ (If you want to be added to my taglist let me know!)

It had been a few days since you and Bishop spoke. The two of you had gotten into a minor blowout. You guys argued on a fairly regular basis, but it was always coming from a well-intentioned place on both ends. You were protective of each other and with the life that he lived, it was stressful to care so much. He wanted to keep you as far away from club business as possible, and you wanted the exact opposite—you couldn’t protect him or yourself if you didn’t know what you were going up against.

When you had called Bishop that day and asked if he was free to grab a drink, just wanting to see and talk to him after the long week that you’d had, he told you not to come by the clubhouse. He let you know that the club had pissed some people off and the clubhouse was a bit of a hot-spot. The information was meant to deter you, but if anything it made you speed over there as quickly as possible to make sure that everyone was alright.

When Bishop heard your car pull onto the lot, he made his way over to it, not even allowing you the chance to make it to the steps of the clubhouse. He tried to get you back into your car, telling you that sometimes you need to just fucking listen to him when he tells you to do things. You weren’t a person who took kindly to being bossed around, not even by Bishop, so things got out of hand pretty quickly after that. And it had been radio silence since.

You were getting out of the shower, ready to pull on your pajamas and climb into bed when you heard your phone buzzing on your bed. You hated that you were hoping to see Bishop’s name on the screen. It wasn’t, though. With a sigh you picked it up and answered.

“Hey, Angel, what’s up?”

“Hey. You with Bish?”

You scoffed, “No, why?”

There was a slight hint of amusement in his voice, “Damn. Alright. Didn’t realize that was a tense question,” he paused, “He left a few hours ago pretty pissed off. Stormed out of his meeting with Taza and Hank. We just…um…know that you two kinda…”

“Kinda what?”

“Don’t get defensive,” he laughed, “He just. You know. He talks to you. Figured you should be the first person to call since he isn’t picking up his fucking phone.”

You sighed, “I haven’t seen him.”

“Alright. If you do—”

“I’ll let you know.”

He tried and failed to bite back a chuckle, “Thanks. Take care of him, yea?”

You rolled your eyes even though he couldn’t see you, “That’s all I’m ever trying to do these days.”

“We love you, y’know.”

“I know,” you laughed, “Bye, Angel.”

“Later, Y/N.”

You tossed the phone back onto your bed as you weighed out your options. It wasn’t like Bishop to blow off the club like that. You had no idea what was going on—he made sure of that the past few weeks, but it must’ve been something rough to make him storm out and shut his phone off. As much as you wanted to keep giving him the cold shoulder, your heart wouldn’t let you.

So that was how you ended up parking in his driveway that night. His bike was in the driveway and even though the house was dark, you knew that he was home and that he was more than likely still very much awake. He was never able to sleep when he was angry, which was half the reason the man was so exhausted all the time.

You were digging around in your purse as you made your way up the driveway. Eons ago Bishop had given you a spare key to his place in case of emergencies. You never really needed it. Whenever you were going to his place it was always because you were invited, so the door was always unlocked. He wasn’t expecting company now though, especially not yours.

Taking a deep breath, you slid the key into the lock. You were rewarded with the clicking sound of the lock opening. Part of you expected him to have changed the locks since he gave you the key so long ago. You were glad that he didn’t because the prospect of trying to open and crawl through a window wasn’t an inviting one. And you knew that if you knocked on the door and tried to get him to let you in, he would just ignore you. You knew because you would do the same thing to him if the roles were reversed.

The door always took some extra effort to push open. Bishop was more than handy and you never understood why he didn’t just fix it. Whatever the reason, you found yourself shouldering the door rather hard to gain entrance to the house. You stumbled in, bracing yourself against the door to keep from falling to the floor when it finally gave way.

“Fuck,” you mumbled under your breath as you straightened yourself out and pushed the door shut, locking it again. As you were going to pull your shoes off, you heard the unmistakable click of a gun. The house was dark and you knew that he probably had no idea that it was you. You chuckled, “Are you gonna pull the trigger?”

You heard him huff as he reached and turned a light on, “What the fuck, Y/N? You’re gonna get yourself shot breaking into places like that.”

You waved the key around, “Not breaking in if I have a fucking key.”

He put the safety back on and set his gun to the side. Exhaustion and frustration was present in every inch of his face. Part of you wanted to hug him, and part of you wanted to smack him because you still weren’t done being mad at him for being an ass to you.

“Why are you here?” he didn’t sound overly annoyed, just tired.

“The guys called me—they’re worried about you,” you walked closer to him, “Figured I should stop by and make sure you didn’t go off on a bender.”

He held his arms out, as if inviting you to inspect him, “Satisfied?”

As much as you wanted to keep being mad, your brain was telling you to reach out to hug him, to caress his face and make the worry lines fade away. You didn’t, though—you couldn’t. Instead, you shrugged, “For now. I’m not leaving, though.”

“Oh?”

“You can’t kick me out of the clubhouse and your house, Obispo,” you walked over and plopped down on the couch.

He sighed, “We’re still arguing about that?”

“We can be done arguing about it if you admit that I’m right.”

He sat down on the couch next to you, “You can’t admit that I had a little bit of a right to be mad?” he shook his head, “I asked you to do one thing and you just—”

“What about me made you think that I would just leave you guys alone if things were getting rough?” you didn’t let him finish his sentence, “I’m willing to break into your fucking house to make sure you’re alright. You think that I wouldn’t make the drive over to the clubhouse to make sure you’re safe?”

“So you do admit it’s breaking and entering?” there was a hint of a smile on his face, and you hated that it made your heart feel a little fuller.

You rolled your eyes, “Not the fucking point.”

His expression sobered, “I know. But you…you do get why I don’t want you involved in all that shit, right?”

“Not really.”

He pressed his lips into a thin line, trying to choose his next words carefully, “I’m not going to be the reason you get fucking shot. If you got hurt because my club got into shit with the wrong people I wouldn’t ever be able to forgive myself.”

“You aren’t responsible for what I do. I make my own fucking decisions. You don’t get to ice me out because you get nervous. You’re my best friend and you don’t get to just decide that I—”

“I can’t do this without you!” he snapped, shaking his head. He took a deep breath, making a conscious effort to quiet his voice, “I can’t lose you. You can get mad at me all you want over that. If you ignoring me for a few days, a week, keeps you alive then by all means fucking do it. If something ever…I can’t…” he couldn’t get his words in order.

You felt your attitude melting away as you watched him fumble to put his feelings into words. You reached out and rested your hand on his arm, “Bish, hey, come on now,” you smiled, “I’m tough. You don’t gotta worry about me.”

“Yes, I do,” despite your attempt to lighten the mood you could still see the heaviness in his eyes, “I’ve watched a million things fall apart in my hands. You can’t be another thing that gets added to that list. And if that means you’re going to hate me from time to time then I’m willing to live with that.”

“I’ve never hated you,” you said with a shake of your head.

He waited for your eyes to meet his, “Look, I know we rarely agree on things. And I know you’re not happy about how I choose to do things,” he covered your hand with his own, “but you’re here, and I love you for it.”

Your eyes widened at his statement, “Wh-what?”

He gave your hand a squeeze, “I love you.”

“Even when I’m kicking in your door?”

He chuckled, nodding, “Especially then.”

Your heart was racing inside your chest—you were almost certain that Bishop could hear it as he sat next to you. This wasn’t where you had been picturing the conversation going. Everything that you’d kept bottled up for years was bubbling to the surface as you smiled over at him, “I love you too.”

“And I’m sorry for yelling at you when you came to the clubhouse,” he sighed, “I just…I was picturing the worst and I didn’t want you caught in the middle of it.”

“You worry too much.”

He chuckled, his gaze meeting yours, “Someone has to.”

You felt like you were supposed to have something profound and meaningful to say. But as you sat there next to him and let him stare deep into your eyes, there wasn’t a single word or phrase that came to mind that could say what you really felt. That being the case, you leaned forward and pressed your lips to his.

There was no hesitation in his movements as he rested his hand on the back of your neck, keeping your lips attached to his. You braced yourself against him as you leaned farther and farther into the kiss. His fingertips pressed lightly into your neck and you wished that you could just melt completely into him.

When you finally pulled away, both of you had satisfied smiles on your faces. You laughed quietly as you reached up, tracing your fingers through his beard, “Do me one favor, Obispo?”

He nodded, “Anything.”

“Fix that fucking door,” you laughed, “Next time I wanna come and see you I don’t want to feel like I’m committing a criminal act.”

He laughed, kissing your temple, “I can do that for you,” he paused, “Thank you for not giving up on me. I know I don’t make it easy.”

You chuckled, “Neither of us make it easy. Keeps us both humble.”

He pulled you into another soft kiss, “I love you.”

You kept your forehead pressed against his, “I love you too.”

[caffeineaddicted-noonie]

Sooo like I found one of your match-ups on my dashboard and decided to get one. Sorry if I do this wrong or send this when you aren’t accepting any buut here I am! (:

I’m the Turbulent Logician (INTP-T) and a demigirl (they/she) who’s bisexual! January Aquarius, born on Jan 28th. I really don’t have a preference for a match-up. I’m 5’4.9, pretty tanned (well wheat-ish? Idk what it’s called) and in between skinny and chubby. My style would be black oversized hoodie sweatshirts or graphic tees with black jeans. Oh and I wear glasses and rings on a daily basis!

Just random stuff about me:

I really do love watching Anime. I don’t really read manga but yea.

I listen to Music at least a good 5 hours a day. I listen to a lot of rock/metal/punk genre of music. I don’t really like country minus a few songs, all of them being from the 60s-70s. Girl in red, My chemical romance, Black Viel Brides, Falling In Reverse, Queen, SlipKnot, Guns N’ Roses, Green day, the list goes on and on

Arguing (well not actual arguing with shouting and crying but playful banter and little insults here and there)

I do really like collecting stones, old coins, expired credit cards, etc etc

Huge anything horror/weird type of person. I really don’t find most stuff scary which is kinda weird, like I could watch a movie with thousands of jump scares and not get scared.

Very very awkward in person, and I have social anxiety. I love talking though, if I know/trust you please expect your ear to be talked off if you even remotely bring up a topic I love. I can’t really approach people and be like “hi hello be my friend”, just extremely introverted.

I love nature and animals; both literally deserve to be treated better than they are. Half of the animals now days wouldn't act aggressive towards us if we have left them alone. I heavily believe that animals deserve the world and that we should really just let them be.

Sooo That’s about it

Lemme know if you need more!

AND JUST CREEPYPASTAS PLEASE

AIGHT! SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG TO DO. I HOPE YOU LIKE IT!

I MATCH YOU UP WITH

HOODIE / BRIAN 📹

What is needed… log 1 - friends 🌹

+ You two got along with music. + Brian has a thing for rock genre, he loves it! The energy and melody that goes along with. + Any music genre that’s similar, giving the chaotic vibe, he will like it. + How exactly did you two got along at first? Grocery shopping, truck, Tim’s driver and you’re coming with him and Brian. + You were coming with to get somethings fo yourself. + He surfed the radio for songs + Welcome to The Jungle, by Guns n Roses was on. (I rarely see that bat my place ngl, sad) + He jammed to it, you as well until Tim pointed out that you guys were having a personal concert. + Oh? He likes rock too? yes! + You guys would jam together a lot! Whether it’s in the car, the kitchen, on th roof, etc etc. + But you were usually silent. Usually. You would talk to him, but it’s kinda like just, ”So, what song next?” ”Do you like this song?” ”Never heard of this one..” Just small chit chat. + through time, you got used to him and started ’big’ convos, ”When do you listen to them the most?” ”What do you think this song means?” + Collecting? He’d help you with it! Got back from a mission and gave you a butterfly shaped rock once.

will be wanted. log 2 - lovers ❤️

+ Heart shaped leaves. He made them for you. (I’m not sure what you’re reaction would be however, how would you react?) + You know all of those things you collected? If you gave him any, he keeps them in a special drawer. He’d even give you a decorated box for you to put your collections! + Your way of ’arguing’? He’s fine with it. Kinda finds it cute. + He sees it like, serious debating. Like in a parliment. + He has a playlist, dedicated for and about you. + He is a good listener! If you want to talk about something, sure, no harm no foul am I right? + MATCHING T- SHIRTS AND HOODIES!! + He agrees with you about animals. + He has a dog, not Smile, but his own dog. + If you guys go on a mission, he has a packet of dog food, cat food and nuts. Nuts are for squirrels ;D + MAKES BREAKFAST FOR YOU! + He finds you amazing when it comes to horror stuff. Jumscares? Gets him sometimes. Don’t let him play FNAF alone… + Type of relationship? The type to get along with anything. What you wanna eat, do, feel. Understanding!!

(I don’t know why, but I see the both of you wearing matching rings X] )

SORRY IT TOOK LONG! BUT HERE IT IS! I HOPE YOU LIKE IT <3 <3 <3

[one-smuts]

.......ok!

What I can't Have.

Summary: Shinsou falls in love with Denki just in time for Denki to fall out of love with him.

Ships: Denki/Jiro- fluff, Denki/Shinsou- Angst.

Pov: Shinsou

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was happy for him at first. Honestly I was.

It was getting sad for awhile, the way he followed me around like a lost puppy. The lost lovestruck look in his eyes when he looked at me. I felt like a monster, but at the time, I didn't feel that way for Kaminari.

He was my friend, my best friend even. But my lover? I just couldn't phantom it. I remember sitting him down to tell him. He seemed somehow shocked I knew how he felt. The thing about Kaminari is, he wears his emotions on his sleeve. For better or worse.

"So...you know how I feel?" He said, a spark of hope in his voice.

"I do."

"Aaand?..." Christ. He was gonna make me say it.

"I-I'm sorry Kaminari. I just dont feel the same. You're a great guy and all, I just don't feel that way for you. I hope we can stay friends though."

I think I watched his soul shatter that day.

I didn't see Denki for a few weeks after that. Im pretty sure he was avoiding me. Not like I could blame him though. It's hard to get rid of feelings when you see that person everyday. I missed him though. I missed him so much. Looking back, that probably should have been my frist hint.

When he started texting me again, it was a relief. I had my best friend back! And we xkuld actually talk and hang out now. No more lovey eyed guilt trips he didn't even know he was taking me on. Apprently, he'd gotten really into music to process his emotions, and it really helped him heal.

We have Jiro to thank for that.

I don't hate Kyouka. I think she's actually a wonderful girl, and I nothing but thankful for her, for being there for Kaminari when I couldn't be.

That said, the moment he introduced us j saw it. He had that same love struck look in his eyes. It didn't surprise me. Kaminari had the heart of a hopeless romantic, it was made of elastic.

The difference was, she had the same eyes for him. It shocked no one when they started dating. And look, I was happy for them! Denki deserved someone who could love on his level and Jiro fit the bill. She was kind and caring, and they both loved music. I couldn't believe it, but she tought his tone deaf ass to play guitar! They have a small band together now. They make amazing music.

And they really are adorable together. I started inviting Jiro to our hangouts, so she knew she was welcome. At first, I thought I was annoyed at being a third wheel. Watching them curl into eachother on the couch, while I sat on the floor on movie night. How they would get into these feedback loops of just gushing over one another. And don't even get me started on the playlisys.

But, slowly I realized it was more. It was in the way he held her close at all times. They way he talk about her, as if she was some divine gift. It was in the way he looked at her, with those love struck puppy eyes.

Fuck, I missed those eyes being on me.

Leave it to me to only realize I want someone once I couldn't have them. My stomach would turn into knots when's I saw him. My head would feel light, and on the rare occasion it was just us, I'd get damn near giddy. I was a love struck fool.

And, maybe it really was just so I could heal and move on. Maybe it's because I'm selfish. Maybe it was because some tiny part of me hoped he'd leave her for me. But, I told him exactly how I felt.

It started out normal, we were playing Mortal Kombat, but, I guess he noticed my game was off.

"Alright, what's wrong?"

"What do you mean?"

"You lost."

"I lose all the time."

"Yea, but not with noob!" His laughed was always so adorable. "Noobs your main! So what's going on?"

I got cold feet at the question. I was I was sure I wanted to tell him, but now...

"Im fine, I promise."

"Hitoshi, you know you can tell me anything, right?"

"Yea?"

"So why are you keeping secrets now?" He asked. He was right. It didn't ruin things when I rejected him, why wouldn't work out the same way in reverse? And his smiled was so warm, and inviting.

"I-..I think I love you."

"Aww, I love you too bro!"

"No, Kaminari, I mean I love you."

His smile dropped.

"What?"

"Look, I know that I said I didn't feel the same, and at the time I didn't, but I love you! Seeing you with Jiro made me realize, I-"

"Hitoshi, that's not fair." Denki said, uncharacteristically cold. I could see the tears form in his eyes. But, it wasn't the same as last time I saw them. These weren't tears of heart break.

"I waited a whole year for you. I wanted you, for so long, and you told me you didn't want me. Not the other way around. And now thG I'm happy and everything is good, and, for the first time in forever, I feel like I'm not carrying bricks on my chest, you wanna do this? Hitoshi, do you like seeing me hurt?"

"No! Kaminari, I would never do anything to hurt you!"

"Then why tell me?! What did you expect?! For me to just leave Jiro and come running into your arms? I love Jiro. And I'm pretty sure she loves me. She loves me enough not to try and crash everything I worked so hard to build." He was crying now. I wondered how over me he really was. I wondered if that was selfish to think.

"No, I don't want to break anything you built-up. I just had to get it off my own chest. I don't want you to leave Jiro, I just...I dont know."

"I-..I dont know either man. I'm sorry but, I really don't feel the same anymore. I don't know why I'm so mad about it." He confessed. He refused to make eye contact. "I guess I'm just mad that I spent months miserable over the fact that you'd never love me. And, I guess it all feels like it could have been avoided now."

"Im sorry."

"But, I don't know if I want to have avoided it." He wiped his eyes with his sleeve. He wasn't crying anymore, but his eyes still had had a sharpness.

"If I avoided it, I wouldn't have gotten so close to Jiro...but...I just.." He cut his own thoughts off with a groan, hiding his face in his hands.

"Im sorry."

"I know you are." He mumbled. He looked over at him. "I loved you Hitoshi. I really truly did."

"Its not too late, I-" that was the wrong thing to say. A scowl came across his face.

"Yes it is. I loved you. Ed. Past tense. My emotions and how I feel don't get pushed to the side because you finally came you your sense and realized how you felt. My relationship isn't going to just end because you want it to."

He grabbed his backpack and stood up. I wanted to reach out for him and make him stay. But, I knew that would be wrong.

"I-I'm sorry Hitoshi. I just dont feel the same. You're a great guy and all, I just don't feel that way for you anymore. I hope we can stay friends though." He mumbled as he walked to the door. He looked back at me.

"I'll see you later man."

"See you later."

And thats where we are now. I've been laying on my bed going over this entire situation in my head for hours. I definitely could have gone about that last interaction diffrent, but, it doesn't matter. I missed my shot.

Stupid late stage crushes.

I can't help but think about how he must have felt just like this all that time ago. And I feel almost worse knowing I put him through it.

But, I know I can't lose him. He's my best friend, I'd be devastated to lose him completely.

So, I guess I gotta just get over it.

_________________________________________

A/N: hope ya like it @firelove151! I haven't ever really written anything like this before so, as always constructive feedback is welcome!

[jt-artsandfics]

Mantis blades and Gorrila fist pt 5

~~~~~~

Woah chapter five I'm quite happy with myself

I hope you all enjoy and I can't wait to make more

~~~~~~~

V woke up a little after 9am still wrapped up in the sheets of his bed while laying onto of Oda. The Arasaka guard was running his fingers thought Vexrins messy and tangled blue and red hair humming lightly.

Vex moves a little to meet the Pale grey eyes "Good morning" Oda lent down and places a soft kiss on Vs lips, a soft dreamy look on his face as he lays back down.

They layed in silence for a good five minutes before Oda groaned about having to get up and get ready for work.

"Vexrin your gonna have to move I need to get ready for work" V grumbs before rolling over onto the bed and pulled the sheets up aroudn his chin as he watches Oda move around the apartment picking up his uniform along with he boots.

This time he doesn't retreat to the safety of the bathroom to get changed. Vex watches him strip and gets a good look at the cybernetics on his throat.

They run out lightly onto his shoulders and down his back a little. And that's when he sees the beautiful work of art on Oda's back.

Its a white tiger with bright blue eyes surrounded by tiger lillies "I dont know you had a tattoo!" Oda looks over his shoulder to where V was laying.

"I got it very shortly after I began working for Hanako-sama. Takemura-san also have a tattoo down his back. It is something that means alot too me. Both Takemura and I got them right after I was assigned to Hanako. His is a fox and Wolf with cherry blossoms and Iris. He said flowers have meaning to them and the ones you pick define you for who you are. What of you Vexrin do you have flowers that have meaning to you?" Oda begins pulling his uniform pants up and buckling them.

As V gets up off the bed he part of his pants down to show a small ring of flowers on the side of his him. "Violets and For get me not?" Oda asked looking at the tattoo of the small blue and purple, red and yellow flowers.

"Forget me nots had a big meaning to me when I was younger while violets I loved becuase my little brother and used to have a small garden filled with both of them, some times we would make tea with the Violets" V explains as he moves behind Oda to run his hands over the Tiger on his back.

"It's beautiful craftsman ship, I used to want to follow my dad's footsteps and me a tattoo artist but then it became easier for people to get tattoos" Vexrin smiled lightly tracing the lines down Oda's back. Oda turns around to face V. "Your father was a tattoo artist?" Vex let's out a small chuckle as he inspected the detail in Oda's Ink. "Yea he was, he was really good at it two, Indian I got to learn more about it"

Both pale grey and black and white meet again. "I've seen you have another tattoo on your chest it's a snake of a sort?" Oda asked as he pulls his shirt on and begins to button it up.

Vexrin pulls his shirt off to show the tattoo of a colourful snake that wraps around part of his body with a small heart tattooed on his chest.

"Ngalyod or the Rainbow serpent, Im orignally from Austraila. my nanna would tell stories about my ancestry that she was told when she was young. We used to have her tell them to us as bed time stories. But the rainbow serpent was one which I always loved to hear about, learning about part of my culture that we didn't really learn about when my mother and father past. But both poppy and nanna told up a all the stories"

Vexrin smiles lightly remembering all the good times from his childhood from running aroudn on the small farm he lives on got he dream time stories that his family would tell so that they would not forget who and were he came from.

Oda had finished pulling his uniform on and enjoyed the recountings of V's family and story. "Your family where are they now?" He asked.

Taking a seat to do his shoes. "My little brother Dustin moved to Night city with me when I was given the chance of a corpate job, he is going to school at one of the higher education schools. While my nanna passed away 5 years ago my poppyis still living out on his small farm in Queensland I send him money when I can so he can keep the farm going.

He didn't want me to work for the big cooperations, said he feel it in his bones that something would go wrong. I guess he was right" Oda can feel The sad smile of V's face he pulls him in for a hug placing his chin on Vex's head.

"I apologise for asking, I did not wish to bring bad memories" V let's out a small laugh before moving slightly. "Can I kiss you?" He asks very lightly and if Oda didn't have his enhancements he most likely wouldn't have heard him.

Oda leans down and places a quick kiss on V's lips. He pulls away picking up a bag with the rest of his gear in it. "I have to head to work now but am aloud to come back later tonight?" He asked hoping that this wasn't a one time thing.

V pulls him back into a kiss this one was sweet and quick and V let out a soft laugh again. "You are welcome over anytime" he gives Oda a quickpeek on the forehead before pushing him to the door.

" Now go to work or you are gonna be late!"

V watches as Oda leave his apartment before finally heading back inside, he moves around getting ready for the day when he get a call for Misty.

"Hey V I was just checking in on you again I know it's been a few weeks, I did a reading for you, I did a past, present and future spread and well you got the Tower reversed, death upright and the Lovers upright. So its very different" v stood there for a while trying to recall the meanign for the card.

" I remember death upright is something to do with change and transformation but I do remember the other too, I swear the death cards my friend at this point " misty has a light laugh before she continues.

" tower reversed can mean  Personal transformation, fear of change, averting disaster. All decks are different so they could have different meanings. Death upright is Endings, change, transformation, transition and as you have said your familiar with this card and the Lovers upright is love, harmony, relationships, alignment, choices so it's very different from. What you normally have. So my question is there someone you are seeing?" Misty asked making Vex blush.

"Maybe.. well I don't know what it is but like yes. No? I don't have a clue.. ok he's coming over tonight" misty is laughing on the other end of the call.

"Well how about you come stop by the shop which I close up for the day and we go out for the day!" V smiled at the suggestion. " that be awesome Misty I'll meet you at the shop" with that there call ended and Vex got read to leave as he does he decided to shoot Goro a message.

Vex: hey, hey Goro, was wondering if you could forward me Sandayu's contact, Please and thank you!

Takemura: I must ask Why Vex, had Oda been a bother again?

Vex: hahaha no but we have started talking and I i forgot to ask him for his holo, he's been sparing with me a little But we aren't at each other's throats anymore.

Goro: that is good to hear :), I will forward his contact to you shortly,

Once Oda had left Vexrins he had arrived at work with 30 minutes to spare. As he walked into the Estate he gave a quick bow to the other guard as he made his way tough being checked.

He gets a notification the only people who would be messaging him would be Hanako, Goro and his parents. So when an unknown number pops up he is hesitant but decided by her to get it out to the way.

.....: Hey Oda it's me Vex, just letting you know that spare keys are in the broken light on the door"

He lets out a small chuckle before sending but a message

Sandayu: thank you Vexrin.

He quickly sets V's contact up.

Name: Vex-kun

Number: ////////////

He has a bit of a laugh to himself about it but in the end leave it.

After that most of the day had been staying within the room which Hanako was or following her where ever she needed to be.

As the day slowly turned to night they had arrived back at Hanako's estate, Oda was watching the time almost like a hawk at this point and it didn't go un noticed.

He still has alteast half an hour until his shift ends, he had never feel that time going so slow until now.

"Oda?" He turns to Hanako again she had a light smile on her face as she calls him to take a seat. He walks over and sits down.

"Will you be staying and watch old movies tonight, you seem like you want to be anywhere but here" he lets out a sigh. "Forgive me Hanako-sama, that is not my intention, just excited and nerves" that peaks Hanako's interest. He can seem the small smile as she bring her glass to her lips. 

"And what could have you so distracted, should I say who?" They share a small laugh and it goes quite again. "A man, I... I trust you Hanako-sama and.. fuck it's V" he closes his eyes and a blush can be seen across his cheeks. Hanako let's out a laugh before placing her hands on his shoulders.

"If he makes you happy then I have no problem with it, if he hurts you not even Takemura will save him" the next half an hour was Hanako asking question and Oda answering them.

When his shift was over Hanako waved he out with a smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag list @simping-for-sandayu-oda @gvitch @v-is-for-witch @hippiefricked @inkrabbit @shitposting-for-the-soul

~~~~~~~~

[cosmictulips]

I found the password now! Anyways, what I wanted to ask is if the energy of the connection of my friendship with my best friend going downhill? I didn’t know how to word the question so hopefully this made sense. We haven’t had any type of fight or anything but ever since we graduated high school (2 years ago) everything we talk about is just about her. And it’s the same topic and sometimes I just won’t answer her anymore but she’ll spam me with the same topic of conversation. And I have given her advice and try to be there and even told her that she needs to figure out her particular problem but she keeps doing it over and over again. Now, when I do try to text her or something she doesn’t really reply with the same energy as me if that makes sense? Like one word replies and nothing else. Yet when she wants to talk about her issue that is job related (she gets a new job literally every 1-5 months and once she gets it everything about her job she hates) she has all the energy in the world. I do love her since we’ve known each other and have been friends since we were 10 and now we’re both about to be 21; but I’m just tired. It’s to the point where her energy drains me whenever she tries to talk to me and that’s an issue. Sorry this was so long btw, lol that’s how you know it’s been bothering me. Also, cheese! ;) her initials are JR and she’s a cancer (06/22/2000) and mine are VM/Aries (04/17/2000). Thank you so much! 🧀💚

Hello Friend =D

my gods you make me feel so old lmao

My going on 25 here lmao

Honestly,  don't apologize.  I feel like a lot of people go through this when leaving high school.  friends just stop being friends and it's really kind of the time where you question where you belong on this earth, and who you want around you.  it kind of sucks but sometimes we have to grow distant from people we thought we cared about.   I consider myself fortunate.  a lot of my friends that I've had even since middle school have stuck around me through thick and thin -and I've been through hell-  but I understand also the feeling of having to give up a friendship.

before I drew your cards I was shuffling as I was reading the question and info you provided.  and the Fool in reverse came out.  so this tells me that you kind of already know the answer.  but I don't think it's the ending of a friendship so much as it is a beginning of a new journey for you.  if this friendship is made to last,  your friend will come back to you and be excited for you as you continue on down the path you choose.   it's kind of hard these days to talk about things because you know covid and all that jazz.  but you know in your heart,  what's going on.  in the words of the fool in reverse "you are not naive to the situation"

so let's see what's going on ;)

so I pulled the 6 of wands,  the 10 of swords and the 4 of cups.  we got quite the strong overall energy with the Hierophant,  the Fool, and the Lovers.

so there's a change going on between the two of you.  you kind of already stated that fact.  what your relationship is now is failing,  which we can see with the 10 of swords.  there's a failure to communicate, and there's a failure of understanding between the two of you.   but this isn't the worst case scenario.

We got the 6 of wands and the 4 of cups here.  so to me in this context tells me about boredom,  apathy.  neither of you are really caring what happens one day and the next when it comes to the relationship.  Obviously you're tired of what they are giving you and they are probably tired of being bored.   You know what I mean?   I feel like this person doesn't see it the way that you do.    I think that could be the reason why they change jobs so much lol.  they're just finding something to hate the job and so they keep finding it a failure and so it just keeps going over and over again.  but I think your friend is struggling with something.

anyway this is about you lol.

The four of cups also talks about finding your motivation again.  trusting your instincts and finding what propels you forward.  because I can see that she drains you,  and so  I think what this spread is leading to is you stepping away.  You know,  as you get "older" -here comes ole granny tulips lmao -  you kind of begin to realize that everyone has their life and you don't need to stay in contact to keep a friendship.  especially if it feels like you're doing all the work.

So the overall energy.  the Hierophant is about tradition,  and very bluntly,  religion.  I'm not saying you are religious by any means but I think here the best way to handle the situation,  is to do what is normally done.    Whatever you do to solve a situation normally,  do it now.

The Fool and the Lovers tells me that by stepping away and really just focusing on  you,  it's going to help clear the air of whatever is between the two of you.  there's a great chance that you two can come back to each other once you start spending more time on yourself,  and pulling back from the relationship that's draining you.

the lovers card is important here.  it's about unions yea,  but Love is a choice.  Love is something you have to continue to make.  You can love someone at a distance.  and if you choose to do this, I'm seeing the 2 of swords, the ace of wands and the star.  so you'll be forced to make a choice whether you want to go down that road again with your friend,  and whatever you choose is going to start a brand new connection that you have been wishing for or wishiing to return to.

so yea,

I think that's everything. It's okay to let this relationship as it is die.  obviously with the 10 of swords there's feelings of failure, and that's okay.  OH I FORGOT ABOUT THE 6 OF WANDS.

Honey that's victory.  the relationship will work out,  but it's gotta change.  You need to put yourself first and listen to what you are saying.  if you feel drained,  pull away.  if you think you can hang on and confront her about this,  then do so.  the choice is really up to you.  whatever you choose to do,  it's going to turn out well in the end.

okay,

SO THAT is everything lmao. I hope this helps =) if you ever need anything, feel free to let me know =D

[kyouxa]

Diabolik Lovers Chaos Lineage: Shu Sakamaki (Story 02 + CG)

In terms of the gameplay: The black choices lead up to a bad ending, the white choices lead up to a good ending. Please no reposting onto other sites, ask me before translating this into another language too! I’m an amateur translator, but I hope you do enjoy it anyway!♡

Place: Scarlet Mansion - Shu's bedroom

Shu: Just because I sucked your blood, you‘re acting like you’re mine now? I wonder how good you felt.

As your guard, I don’t really have special hobbies besides sleeping. That’s why I don’t want this situation to change.

Yui: Shu-san...?

(What’s with those... cold eyes?)

Shu-san do you know who I am... ?

Shu: The traditional Eve. The key to become king. That’s what I know.

Yui: W-Well that’s not wrong...

(What's going on? Is he mocking me? I have to calm down and think)

(Yes, I woke up at that strange church... everything was weird since that time)

(Everyone is fighting with weapons, fighting for me, Eve)

(Even the brother’s relationship changed. Where are we? I though we should’ve been in Kanashimachi!)

Shu: Hey, are you still stunned that your blood got sucked?

Yui: Shu-san! It seems like we’re caught up in a weird situation!

Shu: Hm? What do you mean?

Yui: I can’t explain it myself but...

This isn’t Kanashimachi, is it? This mansion seems to be in another place...

Besides, how did Shu-san become brother’s with Yuma-kun? That’s not your real family!

Shu: What’s wrong with Yuma being my brother?

Yui: N-Nothing! But in the reverse winding family, Shu-san is the eldest son and Ayato-kun and the others are your younger brothers—

(Oh but it may be...)

...By any chance. Shu-san don‘t you feel like your memories are weird at some points?

Shu: What?

Yui: (Shu-san isn’t the only one. Even Reiji-san and everyone else are having weird memories)

(Why did that happen? Why... !?)

Shu: *sigh*... That's right. Are you trying to manipulate my mind by saying something inappropriate?

Yui: No... everything I said is true!

Shu: Okay. Apart from that, I don’t care. I wasn’t interested in what you say in the first place.

Yui: That’s! Have you forgotten all the important things we’ve done so far, Shu-san?

You really don’t care about them?

Shu: I don‘t. Whatever you say I’m not interested

Yui: ugh...

(This cold attitude... it’s like the time we first met)

(Did he really forget everything? All the time we spent together?)

My name is... Yui Komori, you forgot it, didn’t you? My real name isn’t Eve...

Shu: So that is your real name?

Yui: ...ngh!

Shu: Eve is necessary to become the king. It’s enough if I only know that

Yui: (Those cold eyes and words. His attentive attitude)

(I have no idea what happened to him. But there’s nothing I can do either)

(For now... I’m just a toy and food for Shu-san... he doesn’t care at all about me...)

Choices

1) — holding tears (black)

2) — think desperately (white) ♡ ♡ ♡

— holding tears

Yui: (I can’t cry here. If I cry I won’t make any progress)

(But my vision is already getting blurry...ngh)

Shu: What’s the reason that you’re crying now? You’re a woman who takes more time than I thought.

— think desperately ♡

Yui: (I have to think about this because I spent a long time together with Shu-san already)

(Because we were in a relationship where we could laugh together. I don’t want to give up here!)

Shu: I don‘t know what you think about me, but keep your silly thoughts to yourself

end Choices

Shu: I’ll leave now. I already wasted enough time with you here.

*Shu walks away*

Yui: Shu-san! Please wait!

Shu-san!!

*door closed*

Yui: He’s gone...

(Shu-san... so you really forgot everything... ?)

(We spent so much time at the Sakamaki mansion and we even went to school together)

(He also forgot about my feelings... right?)

(This hurts so much)

Monologue

My feelings were crushed from the bottom of my heart when he rejected me as if we never met before.

Above all, his words were thrown in and out of my head many times.

— What was your name?

In the eyes of Shu-san, I only appear as Eve.

Just as a tool to become the king, no love, no interest, just Eve.

I swayed between those cold eyes, I had no choice but to act as Eve, I’m not Yui in this mysterious situation.

*next day*

On the next day, I was called by Reiji-san and they decided that I should eat with everyone.

I actually don’t have any appetite but I‘ll try a little from the soup.

As everyone surrounded the dining table, I once again looked at the people in this mansion.

end Monologue

Place: Scarlet Mansion - Livingroom

Yui: (Yes, they said that the eldest son of this house was Reiji-san)

(Shu-san is the second and Yuma-kun is the third eldest)

(Everyone's behavior is unusual, but after all everyone’s memories are strange too)

(And the last of those four is Kino-san... Kino-kun, I wonder how I should address him. Yesterday I met him for the first time tho...)

(Similar to us, they also got caught up in this situation, so they don’t remember either)

(Even if I want them to know who they are, I can’t ask them to listen to me because everyone wouldn’t believe me in the first place...)

Reiji: Eve. Your hand has stopped for awhile. Is my food not to your liking?

Yui: T-That’s not true at all! I really loved everything you cooked yet.

Reiji: Now you’re just lying to me. Today is the first time you’ve actually tried my food.

Yui: Oh... yea, that’s right.

Kino: Hehe, was that a joke? I wish I could laugh

Yui: (Hm? Is Kino-kun having a smartphone?)

Kino: Hey, why are you starring at me?

Yui: Hmm... I was just wondering what you’re doing.

Kino: It doesn't really matter what I do, but I‘m playing a game.

Reiji: That behavior is unacceptable, Kino. We’re eating right now

Kino: Yes sure. I understand

Yui: (If I’d make a phone call with Kino-kun's smartphone, I could get in touch with someone... !)

(But, this isn’t the atmosphere that I could talk about that, because Reiji-san’s eyes are pretty scary.)

(While thinking about yesterday, I don‘t even think Kino-kun would approach me...)

Reiji: Your hand stopped again. I guess you didn’t listen. Do you want to be scolded by me?

Yui: I-I’m so sorry!

Reiji: Really... Your manners and courtesy must be attacked properly.

Yuma: Reiji, that’s enough for now. Just continue eating your soup.

Hey, Eve. It doesn’t matter whether it’s your courtesy or manners, because it’s the most important to finish your meal first.

However, you aren’t allowed to leave the vegetables. Don’t waste them

Yui: Yes. Well, actually, are those vegetables all grown up by you?

Yuma: Hm? Oh, that’s right. The tomatoes in this salad were just done growing today 

Yui: (So Yuma-kun is doing home gardening even this isn’t his own house ...)

Yuma: Those are vegetables which I brought up with great care. Make sure to eat them all

Shu: We’re vampires so we actually don’t need to eat any of those.

Yuma: Ah, damn it! Shu! You’re leaving the tomatoes again!

I always say you should eat properly! Even if you don’t need it!

Yui: (After all, it’s comforting. If they act like that, you don’t notice they aren‘t related by blood at all)

(But only I know, that those aren‘t his real brothers ...)

*time passes*

Yui: Thank you for the meal.

(I thought I didn't have any appetite, but I'm still hungry, even tho I ate everything)

(But, I’ll be okay from now on. If I’d complain that the current situation is weird, everyone wouldn‘t believe me anyway)

(And again... Shu-san couldn‘t even look at me while eating...)

Shu: *yawn*... I’ll go back to my room now.

Reiji: Please wait. You should take Eve with you if you leave already.

Shu: Thats not necessary she can go back to her room alone.

Reiji: I don’t know what would happen if she walks around alone again. Yesterday‘s incident was a huge matter for me.

Yui: (Ugh... He’s talking about his broken plate)

Reiji: Well, I will go back to my room as well. Shu, please keep your eyes on Eve.

*Reiji leaves*

Yui: (Oh, he left. Now it’s only me and Shu-san)

Uhm, excuse me...

Shu: You‘ll be fine on your own, you know the way to your own room.

Yui: I'm sorry... but if you leave me now, wouldn’t Reiji-san get angry at you again?

Shu: He would. It’s because you chose me as your guard.

Yui: (Everything is so rooted... )

Shu: Oh, I see. In short, I finally understood his Intention.

Yui: Huh?

Shu: Come on, we’re leaving now.

*Shu leaves*

Yui: Hm? Please wait, Shu-san!

(What got into him so suddenly? Maybe he‘ll really bring me to my room?)

(But where are we going? This isn‘t the way to my room, is it...?)

Place: Scarlet Mansion — Shu's bedroom

Yui: (After all, I thought... we’d return to my room but this is Shu-san’s room...)

(Surely as my guard he needs to escort me but ...)

(After all, am I really going to stay and sleep here from now on without going back to my room ...?)

Shu: You‘re so quiet, just what are you thinking?

Yui: What!? W-Well I nothing... uhm

(I've been in Shu's room many times already, but I'm probably anxious because this place and the situation are different)

Shu: Your face turned red. Are you happy to come to a man's room or do you even think about doing unapproved things?

Yui: I-I didn’t think that! Why would you think something like that!

Shu: For some reason, you came up to my room without resistance tho.

Yui: T-That is...

I was just going to my lover‘s room, so I didn’t think it would be strange...

Shu: ... Lovers? You and me?

Yui: (I... I really said that to him)

Shu: You’re saying those strange things again, why do you want to catch my attention so bad? You really are a lewd woman.

Yui: That’s... ! That’s not really what I wanted.

Shu-san may not remember because his memories are strange but ...

Shu: Remember, remembering memories. You say that every time. You’re saying it sooo often, I can‘t listen to it anymore by now.

Don‘t think I‘d believe any of those stupid things you‘re saying.

Yui: (Certainly, everyone‘s dealing with something like amnesia, but it’s unnatural that their memories are rewritten like that)

(I can’t believe this is happening...)

There... There is no way this happened naturally

Is that supposed to mean, this situation is brought up by someone... !? But who is it?

Shu: Just what are you blabbering about. It seems like you‘ve been sleeping for too long and that’s why you‘re acting weird?

Seems like you didn't like the kiss from Reiji when you got up?

Yui: Eh!? Reiji-san!? Why do you think that?

Shu: You don‘t even know about that? That’s the usual tradition.

Eve, the key to becoming the king, is sleeping in the church and wakes up by a kiss.

I wondered if you’re just lying to me about that now?

Yui: When I got up at the church, there was no one. S-So that means no one kissed me!

Shu: Hmh. Well, it seems that the lore of this tradition was just an after-life story which was brought up.

Yui: (Uh... he seems to be upset about this but it has nothing to do with jealousy)

(But I didn‘t woke up with a kiss, I guess. This story sounded more like the sleeping princess)

(It wasn’t such a romantic awakening)

Shu: *yawn*.... I’m getting tired from talking to you. I’ll sleep.

Yui: Oh? What should I do?

Shu: What about letting me sleep properly?

Yui: Ugh...

(He’s as sleepy as always...)

(But it's hard to talk with him like that and I can’t make him remember anything)

Shu-san, can you at least try getting along with me a little more?

Shu: After all, you’re really not giving up with your delusions? I‘m sorry.

Yui: Well, please wait! It's not a delusion, it's a real thing.

I believe that you can do it... !

Shu: ... If so, why don’t you show me your sincerity.

Yui: What... ?

Shu: You said it wasn‘t strange that I sucked your blood yesterday.

That’s why you should donate me your blood. If you can satisfy me, you can talk about whatever you want.

Yui: (Shu-san's eyes changed)

(I should’ve been used to have my blood sucked... yet I'm scared)

(Right now, I am nothing but food. I don't know how much blood he will suck either ...)

Shu: Heh... such a face. So you‘re really declining my offer?

Yui: N-No i‘m accepting your offer... ! You can take as much blood as you want if you listen to me afterwards.

Shu: Is your voice trembling? Laughable.

Yui: Ngh...

Shu: So? You’re offering your blood and I‘ll listen to you later.

Hurry up and get a little closer to me, do you understand?

Yui: I understand...

*Yui gets closer*

(There is no need to be scared. Even if he lost his memories, Shu-san is Shu-san.)

Yui: (Oh, but... my hands are shaking)

Shu: Letting me unbutton your shirt like that, you really are horny.

Yui: This... is... because Shu-san was always... nh

Shu: I see. I don‘t mind. Now, tell me what you want me to do.

Yui: (I'm embarrassing to say something like this ...)

Please... suck my blood

Shu: Hah, aren‘t you trained to be a honest fairy tale princess?

Shu: You should continue begging for me, with that arroused face of yours ... ahh… 

Yui: ... ngh!

(I was really bitten.... ngh. It hurts so much...)

Ngh... Shu-san ... It hurts... be a little more... gentle .... ngh..

Shu: I don’t need to show mercy to such a dirty woman

Yui: But... ngh

Shu: It‘s okay as long as you remain silent and let me continue with sucking your blood.

Ahh… hmm… hmm... 

Yui: (Hmm... stop.... I only feel pain and the smell of my blood itches in my nose...)

(His fangs are in my neck... There is no sign that he slightly cares for my body)

Shu: Hehe... to be honest, your blood isn’t bad at all.

Deep bitterness is entangled in my throat. It’s the taste of blood that feels fear

Yui: W-Well...

(Although my partner is Shu-san, I‘m still afraid... but)

(If he keeps sucking so much like this, I may be drained and lose my mind... If he won‘t release me anytime soon I might faint—)

Shu-san... ngh. Please... stop...

Shu: Be quiet.

Yui: But... you said if I let you suck my blood you‘ll listen to me...

Shu: I'm not close to be satisfied yet. You‘re just food anyway, so stop moving so much.

Yui: ...ngh!

(Shu-san... what’s with that tone in your voice...? Are you really not caring at all...?)

(That’s right, I‘m not Shu-san‘s lover anymore. Right now... I‘m just food)

*CG fades*

Shu: I don't know why but, I really like that look in your face. It kinda turns me on

Why don‘t you tell me where it hurts the most? Maybe if I let my fangs pierce through your ear

Yui: No... stop...

Shu: You should feel good. *more sucking*

Yui: Ngh... I...

(Yeah ... it hurts ... and he won‘t stop...!)

(My Consciousness is ... at it’s, I ...)

*weird noise*

Shu: Ngh... !? Ugh...

Yui: Huh... ?

(What‘s wrong... he suddenly gulped. Is he okay... ?)

Shu: What was that just now... ?

Yui: Are you okay... ? Seems like something is wrong...

Shu: ...Nevermind. Your blood became thick out of nowhere, that’s why. We might continue later.

Yui: But, if you got a little...

Shu: Who said the food was allowed to talk back? You should just be quiet and give me more of your blood

*Shu blushes*

Shu: Oh, or maybe... Was I frightened or scared? Should I run away from you?

Yui: Ngh... you can‘t do that. I really need to talk to you

(Shu is now honest but still scary...)

(But I will definitely get back his memories and return him to the usual Shu-san) (I won‘t give up until then... I don’t want to give up) 

Shu: What a ruthless woman. I'm fine, though. I had no intense to escape. Next time I won‘t let anything interrupt me

Yui: ...Understood

Shu: You suddenly act like an adult. Did you give up on resisting already?

Yui: No... but it doesn’t matter if I do as you like or not...

Shu: Heh... I won't do anything about you saying something so apologetic.

I need to scold you. As you wish, I‘ll suck your blood until you‘re dry.

Yui: (It's almost like when we first met. He‘s looking for only my blood in a whim without the slightest interest in me) 

(He forces me to offer him my blood, with those cold eyes but even if he doesn’t care what happens to me)

(Even if I get treated badly, my feelings won't change for you... Shu-san)

Monologue 

His fangs which were addicted to my blood, pierced deeper in my body.

After that, my consciousness left me and I couldn‘t find time to tell him anything anymore.

That cold gaze and his fangs. Those words who pushed me away.

I feel fear even though he should be the one I love and treasure the most, I‘m sorry 

→ Story 03

← Story 01  

[mydefenseihavenone]

OK I’M FINALLY READY

Here’s a thread about taylor’s HEAVY use of circles this era and how much she highlighted them in the YNTCD music video. I by no means think that I’ve got something brilliant sorted out, but maybe this helps someone else come up with a really brilliant theory. Let’s get started.

I hope these first four are pretty obvious / self-explanatiory. Lots of circles everywhere. Lots of spinning. The pool circles are literally the thumbnail of the video. Circles are IMPORTANT

also!! look at the little circular curls she made with rollers at the beginning! she keeps a look similar to this for most of the video!!!

After that, we see this:

and these:

(I’ll note here that a LOT of these are bicycles. I won’t make the Bi joke, but I will say there’s something about bicycles in taylor’s music videos that always seems liberating for her.) 

(I’ll also note that, in terms of image motifs, I’m already planning posts for the use of butterflies and flowers in this video, but that’s for a separate post.)

Pretty obvious circle(s) in the above image, but the target/bullseye shot is really interesting to note. Especially since...

Don’t drag me; I KNOW hoops are common! But nothing is ever coincidental with Miss Swift, so I figured I’d add this in anyway. (HAYLEY FOR TOUR OPENER, PLEASE)

ALSO!!!!!

not only are the protesters in a circle, but they move in a circle (like the wheels of a bicycle, or a blender, or the camera shot at the pool, or the camera shots below)

phew she really popped off with these (i left the booty drop just for viewing pleasure, not because it’s relevant lmao)

and not to be dramatic but this is a 13 inside a circle. maybe a track having to do with this (and i promise I’ll get to theories and interpretations soon) is track 13? (*insert another dramatic sentence about how i’m gonna get a post together about the stars!!! once we have more info to go off on for analyzing them and why she’s been placing them everywhere*)

NOW!!! UMBRELLAS!!!!

I also think, to run with the bicycle idea, that I love that these are mobile homes!!! I love that in connection with queerness, because I think we’re often happiest with found families rather than our biological ones. Being able to redefine “home”?? super important to me and other queer people I know, and I’m hoping that was one of taylor’s intentions with this setting.

and AHHH!! another one of my favorite things is how many umbrellas (also circular, usually) there are!! why the fuck does that matter, paola?? you might ask. HERE’S WHY: there have been SO MANY umbrellas present this era.

(this reminds me that I have a theory about at least one song or one moment on tour that’s about messiness, considering both ME! and YNTCD end messily - ME! with the rain paint and YNTCD with the food fight, BUT, again, that’s for another post)

there’s a joke in here about eating cake but y’all aren’t ready for it lmaooooo

this is another one that convinces me this is purposeful. who makes a little circular sign like that?? like, genuinely?

okay this next one’s a stretch, but bare with me

why this outfit? all of these are iconic looks, and she definitely looked fantastic that night, but obviously this outfit holds significance. she even posted three different instagram photos of this outfit (and ok, maybe she just liked it. i’m checking all my bases!!!)

heart filter and butterfly shoes... other recurring images this era. I’m arguing that she chose this outfit because the sequins make this outfit, essentially, just a bunch of circles. below is another closeup of sequins that she posted on insta:

(at this point i’m even revisiting whether or not the shape of the buttons themselves - below - were a clue in themselves) (even the fact that she made COOKIES, beautiful round COOKIES with katy!!! is this a huge stretch?? probably!! do i care??? NO)

PLUS, this little cutie is spinning around in this scene--it’s some of the only detectable movement in that moment

and, of course, there’s the iconic spinning crown. there’s one perfect frame of it as a perfect circle before the scene changes.

once i picked up on all of this, I knew I had to check out ME! - and here’s what I found!

iconic circles in the dance! over the words “like a rainbow with all of the colors, babydoll when it comes to a lover” nonetheless!!

and then HMMM!!! A RING!!!!!

(and the introduction of benjamin button; the fictional character he’s named after doesn’t have a proper timeline to his life - he ages backward. a real example of a reversal of the circle of life)

and finally, some subtle details, like when taylor gets spun around in a complete 180, 

the rings of light coming in an out,

and the ripples on the ground as taylor and brandon since the bridge (one of the more significant clues for me, though I’m not sure why - just a gut instinct)

so what do I think it means? i’m not sure, though i’ve been speculating all day.

There’s something about the fact that most of the circles are spinning circles that makes me think there’s a single coming up about a cycle or wheel or ripple or ring or echo, but I don’t feel like we have enough (despite all this) to say what, concretely, it might be. I just knew I had to get all of this down, or I was gonna go crazy with it bottled up in my head.

Katy has a song called Circle the Drain, so it might connect to that. I think there’s value to the circle of life connection, since she posted so much about her childhood a few months back. Or, considering how often these are circles around her or others, it could be about inner circles and real friendship? (esp with the katy reconciliation and their likely collaboration coming soon + the fact that they dance around in little circles together in YNTCD:)

Though it’s unlikely, I kind of want it to connect to her Dany button and the idea of breaking the wheel. With the crown tossed into the air and the buried tires, I think it could be a cool commentary on the lack of necessity to constantly be cycling pop girls and who gets to be “on top,” especially if that’s the katy collab!

but yea!! that’s what I’ve been thinking about all day. I worked really hard on this so if it flops i’ll probably cry, haha, but i genuinely want to know: does this seem absolutely wack??? or do you think there’s some credence to it?? have you noticed anything I missed???

[11tumbler]

Don’t Let Me Fall

Emily was suspended for two weeks.  That was the ruling Julianna, their new Director, passed down.  People were worried about her, but she joked that she would use the time to fix up her apartment, so it wasn’t, as Flynn said, such a shithole. The people close to her knew she could quickly descend back into her own darkness; they were determined not to let it happen.  It had only been a week since Alice was killed and everyone was still struggling with the details.  Nick knew, somewhere deep down, Emily saw him as a failure.  He didn’t find her; he left their son with a woman who was part of Emily’s captivity and then helping to test Flynn.  Emily, even against the force of the FBI, was able to solve her own case.  She was always the better agent and if the roles were reversed Nick was sure she would have found him.  Emily gives Nick a quick hug before she leaves and confirms she will pick Flynn up for the night.  Flynn was another issue they were dealing with, he did not understand how his life could be such a lie, his dead mother only came back a year ago and the mother he thought he knew lied and betrayed him.  Both parents agreed no therapy and to allowing a slow process for each of them to figure everything out.  She brushes over Cal’s hand on the way past his desk simply stating she’d see him in two weeks.  Cal had seen it firsthand how fragile she still was.  He witnessed the panic attacks, the symptoms of PTSD, and the way she was better able to focus when she was working on a case.  Without that distraction he was worried.  He was determined not to let her fall.

The first week was ok, Emily was able to get some things done, but being caged in her apartment was not for her.  She got out and did a little traveling to New York for a few days.  She responded to texts or calls from Cal or Nick.  They were very upbeat and off-topic, but she could tell that what they really were, that they were checking up on her.  Over the weekend, a pipe broke in the apartment upstairs, but across the hall, while the tenant was trying to install a new sink. The landlord notified everyone, and it wasn’t until the water was seeping through the floor dripping into the hall outside her door that it affected her.  

Emily quickly shuts her door and sits at the chair at her desk.  Thoughts roll around in her head, Tommy, Alice, Laurie, Harlow, her mother. Pieces are coming back to her, but she just wants to understand.  Her brain is a frustrating jumble of clues that she needs to understand.  She stands up and walks to her couch lifting the cushion. She pulls out the small baggy with the remaining cocaine in it she purchased a few weeks earlier.  It will be enough for a few hits.  That would get her going now she needs more sodium pentothal to make her remember.

Returning to her apartment, she has what she needed and a solid week to get through the shit in her head. Dropping her coat on the back of the chair she takes her familiar spot on the couch.  She texts Nick, Hey Since I have the week off on vacation 😉 I am going to do a bit of traveling, maybe New York or Penn, I’ll see Flynn when I am back next weekend.  New needles and the bottle are placed on the coffee table.  She psyches herself up, takes a quick snort and sinks the needle into her arm.  Her consciousness fades as she slumps back on the couch into her nightmares.

The text message Sunday night from Cal stated, Just think next week you’ll hate Mondays again. It goes unanswered, though he isn’t too worried as Emily may be sleeping.  Monday he texts, Byrne, you still bored at home, I just got an interesting case I could use some help on – next week right.   If I haven’t solved it by then. Four hours pass and no word.  He stops Nick, “Hey Nick, have you heard from Emily?”  Nick furrowes his brow wondering why Cal was trying to reach her. “No, why what’s up?”  “Well I don’t know; I haven’t heard from her since Friday.”  “Have you been calling her?” Nick asks suspiciously.  Cal tries to play it cool, “Yea just off and on to see how she’s doing, you know.”  Nick nods, “Well you know Emily does what she wants and if she wants to be off the grid she will be. She sent me a message on Saturday, but I’ll call her.”  He pulls out his cellphone, it doesn’t even ring on his end just clicks over to her voicemail. “Hey, uh Emily, it’s Nick. Can you give me a call when you get a minute?”  Nick hopes that maybe if she didn’t want to talk to Cal, she would return his call. He also wonders at their relationship; he read their reports from Moldova, it sounded like a lot of crazy shit went down there.

Cal is now concerned; it is Tuesday and no word from Emily.  He left a message and two texts, the last one threatening to come over if she didn’t respond.  That evening after shift he heads to her apartment.  Banging on the door he calls her name.  There is no answer, he listens and hears no sounds from inside.  He bangs on the door again, “Byrne! Open the door or I’ll break it down.” He bangs again, “Come on!”  “Ok ok!” he hears her yell back.  A few moments later the locks click.  Emily blocks the door, but Cal pushes on by.  

“Byrne, what’s going on!?” “What!?” she asks back.  He turns away from her and walks farther into the apartment.  He sees the needles on the table, he takes two quick steps and grabs one.  Lifting it up he looks at her.  She’s followed him over near the table.  “What the Hell are you doing?”  She doesn’t answer, but just stares at him.  He looks back down at the table, grabbing the vial and reading the label.  His expression turns to shock, “Are you trying to kill yourself!”  “No!” she answers back.  “I’m trying to remember!” He looks at the vial again.  “Are you using this as a truth serum?”  Her non answer answers that for him. “This shit is dangerous and unpredictable.  It causes death, Hell it’s used in Euthanasia.  What the Hell are you thinking.”

“I’m thinking I need to remember!  If I had remembered I would have known Doctor Oduwale was dangerous and I could have protected Flynn.  If I had remembered, I may have stopped him from creating the others.  Me not remembering is getting more people hurt.” Her body gives up and she slides down the wall folding her knees up in front of her.  He sets the vial down and kneels in front of her.  Before he can speak, she attacks him.  “You have no idea what I’m going through.”  “I have no idea?” he responds his voice somewhere between a growl and a whisper.  He starts to unbutton his shirt.  Emily smacks his hands away, “What are you doing?”  He stands up and continues to unbutton his shirt practically ripping at the buttons.  He throws the dress shirt down and quickly pulls the undershirt over his head.  He kneels back down.  “I have no idea?” he asks her.

Emily’s eyes go wide. She slowly reaches her arm out, her fingertips grazing the large scars across his torso.  Cal’s stomach, upper thigh and midway up his chest are marked with thick linear scars half to two thirds across the width of his body.  “POW,” is all he says.  Her fingertips catch over the marred skin as she runs them up and down his body.  Thick linear markings, not from a knife, no, they are too thick, but from what she wonders. She’s seen so many bodies marked in death, but nothing like this.  Her eyes drift up to meet his and he looks almost timid. “God, what did they do to you?” she whispers.  He swallows, “Electric cables,” he’s barely able to get out.  “Uh, we were captured north of Tbilisi.  They wanted information.  They asked for the information.”  He leaves the story at that.  

Emily can’t fight anymore. Her high wore off an hour ago and her stability is returning after her trip with the sodium pentothal.  She pulls her hand back and curls her arms around her legs dropping her face into her knees.  “Hey,” Cal whispers, his fight is gone also.  “Let’s get up.” He unfolds her arms and pulls her up. “Have you eaten anything?”  “Earlier, but I’m not hungry, I just want to lie down.”  They walk into her bedroom.  Cal clears the files and book off her bed and pulls back the covers for her. She grabs onto his hand a pleading look in her eyes.  He crawls over her and onto the other side of the bed.  He kicks his shoes off and tugs the covers out from under himself and gets in behind her.  His right arm bends over her body with his hand resting on her collar bone and shoulder. She moves her left hand over his to hold on to his hand.

They are silent for several minutes.  “I am not sure what I want us to be.” Emily says.  Cal is confused, but she continues. “I don’t know if we’re friends, partners, lovers…”  She lets her thought trail off.  Cal slides his hand down over her heart, her left hand follows.  His thumb starts caressing her chest, then his fingers, in small patterns back and forth.  His hand continues down until it finds the hem of her shirt lifting it up and sliding his hand across her bare stomach.  Her breath speeds up.  He continues gently stroking her stomach and across her ribs.  Emily rotates her body towards him, and his hand follows around to her back.  Her hands come to his face and they lock eyes for several moments before she says anything. “What do you want us to be?” she asks tentatively.  “Everything,” he breathes out almost immediately.  She understands so much meaning in that one word and it scares her. “Anything you want me to be,” he confesses.

She slides closer, her forehead rests against his, still looking into each other’s eyes.  “Why would you give yourself to me?”  “Because you deserve it.  What you went through, and you are stronger for it.  You are amazing and you deserve someone to take care of you and protect you forever.” His right hand finds her face gently tracing her cheek bone with his thumb.  Several more moments pass before she responds.  Never letting go of his face and keeping their foreheads together she slides her knee across his waist to straddle him.  “Don’t let me fall,” she pleads.  “Never,” he assures her.

Her lips find his, not tentatively, but confidently and he immediately kisses her back.  The kiss he wanted to give her, well Hell since Moldova, but honestly since that night they blew off some steam behind that industrial park off Route 10.  He was right, she is amazing, and he would give her anything, be anything, that she wants. Cal’s hands travel down her shoulders over her back and pull the bottom of the shirt up.  Emily sits up to allow it over her head, then comes back down to his lips.  His hand grasps her back.  He felt her scars, he saw them in Moldova, but now he can feel them, the jagged marks across her back.  He grips her tighter.  Neither one stops or says another word, their bodies continue to do the talking together. Hands gripping, lips searching, eyes meeting culminating in gentle love making.

Resting side by side, Emily’s hand skims over his scars.  “Tell me what happened.”  “There was a team of 6 of us, all SEALS, we had moved in basic recon for a base near Tbilisi.  I don’t know if we were unlucky or they knew we were coming because all of a sudden we were surrounded.  There was some gun fire, one guy,” he pauses as he remembers, “Rasmussen, was hit. They made it clear they wanted us alive and we were pinned down, so we surrendered.  We were holed up in a warehouse building.  They left Rasmussen in with us.  His wound wasn’t severe, but it got infected and the moaning and agony of listening to him was just one more thing they used to break us down.”  He isn’t sure he can continue.  He has tried to put this behind him, but he wants to tell her, he wants her to understand some of his backstory.  When he doesn’t immediately continue, Emily asks, “How long?” “A couple weeks; maybe 5 or 6.  It just seemed like one really long day when we were there.  Little to no sleep, round the clock interruptions, torture, lack of food and water, the usual techniques of interrogation.”

“But this,” Emily asks still tracing the lines of his scars.  “Electrical cables.  I was strapped to a table and they were laid over me.  The first time they caught my shirt on fire, so after that I was stripped naked.  They would ask questions then when there was no answer, they would turn on the power. About a week after Rasmussen’s death another guy, Bridge, started making a shive from a piece of plastic pipe he was able to get.  We were all motivated thinking maybe we could still fight and get out of this.  But once he was done, he stabbed himself in the neck with it.  My restraints wouldn’t let me reach him, he was about 12 inches from me, and I couldn’t get my hands far enough over to put pressure on his neck to stop the bleeding. I watched the color drain from his body and his eyes go cold.  We were rescued about two weeks later.”

Emily’s fingertips feather along his jaw and he finally turns from staring at the ceiling to look at her. “You’re beautiful you know.  Inside and out,” she tells him.  He rolls to his side, lifting the sheet between them so his body could rest on top of hers.  No more talking.  Their lips find each other.  This time it isn’t as slow and gentle, there is no feeling out process, there was just need.

[vagabond-sol]

L - Lover - How do they show love? Do they love themselves? Do they believe that all you need is love?

M - Miracle Worker - Who or what do they consider to be a miracle? Do they believe in magic?

Lover: Ah this one is…tough so let’s start in reverse.

No, Cazhim does not think love is all you need though this is mainly due to the fact that he doesn’t use the word lightly. He’d likely tell you he puts more stock in compassion and understanding though that may just be his narrow view of “love”.

The answer to does he love himself changes over time. From leaving Dalmasca to somewhere in Stormblood the answer is “no”. He doesn’t hate himself and would obviously prefer to live but at the time he doesn’t see much value in himself outside of fulfilling a duty be it given or self imposed. During Stormblood, and a tiny bit through Zenos, he learns to be more selfish and that’s where he begins being much more lively and allows himself to enjoy things rather than be a quiet stoic boy all the time.

Lastly he shows his love by being attentive and supportive. He gives you things you needed but only mentioned in passing. He repairs your gear or adjusts it to accommodate you better, provides a distracting conversation when you’re getting in your own head too much. Those sorts of things. As for a lover it’s the same but he gets more invested in your passions and makes more of an effort to share his own.

Miracle Worker: He’d prefer to call it luck but…

He does have people he would begrudgingly call a miracle and that would be his mentor Ms.Snow and Xavier/his romantic partner. Ms. Snow is easy to understand because she should him an insane amount of kindness and is a major reason as to why Cazhim himself is so kind to others. Even easier to see is that anyone that manages to not only fall in love with him but secure the relationship while doing all the hero stuff with him…must be a miracle so yea.

Now since magic is a major and undeniable thing in Cazhim’s life we’ll adjust this to mean something more like fate or maybe karma and the answer to that is…kinda. He believes in luck and that the universe is a whimsical observer of our actions that occasionally tugs a string here or there for fun. He also believes that people have a lot more control over circumstances than they may believe so luck seemed the most inoffensive to him to believe in. He thinks himself very lucky but would never claim any of his actions are a result of fate or magic in the unconventional sense.

Hey thanks for the asks @placesyoucallhome ! It was fun.