#loud and anxious

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Remember: The burning sensation is part of the process.

[offkilterkeys]

You draw tavros ugly and you need to stop. Or be better. Because your fucking bad at it.

Oh I’ve actually been working on that!!!!

Okay so basically like half a year ago I realized I didn’t like my art style and decided to do some Homestuck art studies as a means of getting better at like anatomy and stuff, and that’s where the Tavros on the left appeared from.

After I’d gotten the hang of it I started to reintegrate some of my old stylistic choices, as seen by the Tavros on the right. But honestly I felt meh about both of them cause neither of them line up with my previous portrayals/personal view of the character.

(Old art, circa about a year or so ago^ Shows I used to draw Tavros with less of a lanky body and more fat.)

So I finally decided to buckle down and get the character right and this was the result!

Now I’ll be the first to admit that it’s probably not perfect, but I’ve finally gotten to a point where I like how I draw Tavros again!!!!

The og Homestuck style has like, a lot of variation, and hero mode is honestly wayyyy more vast of a “style” than people give it credit for. Personally, I like to refer to each Homestuck style more by act/place it appears in comic rather than just blanked “hero mode” or “sprite mode,” because I like to integrate THOSE specific influences into my art.

With Tavros specifically I’d like to say the rounder shapes call back to the mixed sprite/hero mode that we see in Tavros’ introduction, as opposed to perhaps Sollux’s introduction panels, where his limbs are rigid and angular, and definitely more “hero mode,” which causes one to view the character as lankier/skinnier.

Either way, I’m still working hard at getting good at striking poses and not falling into “same body type syndrome,” as is often far too easy to fall into. In the past I found it difficult to draw skinny/lanky characters because I wasn’t super used to it, and as of recently I’ve been doing them wayyyy more but I still have an easier time drawing thicker/fatter limbs and stuff. If you’ve got any criticisms or the like, I’m happy to hear them!!!! Always looking to get better eventually :p

[royalarchivist]

[A sad violin song plays over an image of a sad hamster]

Pac: This doesn't have anything to do with me – I wear a blue sweatshirt, you're crazy, this mouse doesn't even have a sweatshirt, this hamster! [Reading chat] Am I a depressed hamster?

[ Transcript continued ↓ ]*

–

Pac: Actually– that's fine! I embrace that idea – of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy? [He hits his desk, then starts counting off people on his fingers] Fit is gone, Richarlyson is gone, Ramon is gone, Bagi and Empanada who were always there when we were there are also gone, I haven't seen them! It's just me and Tubbo, and sometimes Philza shows up.

Pac: I lost Chume Labs, I lost the Favela, I lost Murder Mystery, I lost Ilha Chume Labs, it's crazy! Look at how much I've lost, and I've gained nothing! Of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy?! How am I supposed to be happy?!

Pac: [Reading chat] "You have us Pac," that's true, thank you. No, that's true, sorry.

* NOTE: Please note that this is an incomplete transcript, as I was primarily relying on Aypierre's translation mod at the time and if I am not confident of the translation, I do not include it. As always, please feel free to add on translations or message me corrections.

[gideonisms]

how much of the vitriol everyone felt for each other on the ninth was due to the fact that they never saw the fucking sun

[ancha-aus]

RealAgeAU - Reunion

Fun fact. I was planning on going through these drabbles to see where I still had a bit of a blank spot timeline and story wise. and I did NOT get far.

Because I realised. I never made a tiny drabble about how I pictured the guys reuniting to go back to Nightmare!

So. That is this! (also yes i am hinting at bad sans poly but we will see where that all ends)

First and Prev Drabble (with the original prompt by @spotaus ) Next Drabble

*-----------------*

Cross frowns as the knife once again can't cut through the universe.

This... is an issue.

Cross had managed to get close but for some reason the knife could not connect with Nightmare's universe and castle.

Had... had Nightmare banned him?

Cross hopes not. He knows he had been stupid for running away but he had just! He needed! He had just needed a moment for himself!

Cross tries to take a deep breath and relax. It is fine! Think! Think there is probably another reason!

NIghtmare had been shrinking and losing his form... maybe he is just tired and resting and that affects the universe he is in? Maybe?

Cross wishes Dust was here, Dust knows so much more about magic stuff than he does. Sadly Cross was an idiot and just went out on his own without saying goodbye.

He looks at his phone and opens the message screen again. He clicks Dust's contact and considers typing a message.

Just a quick one to ask for help getting back?

He sighs and puts the phone away. No. This is his mess up and he can fix it himself! He didn't need them or Nightmare to fix his messes!

Again...

Cross shakes his skull and looks to the notes in his phone. He finds the right one. It is a small list of items that should help connect him to Nightmare's universe.

When he first started working for Nightmare the god had told him that the castle and the universe it is in can be hard to find or connect to because of his magic. The items would help the magic in his knife, or the teleportation crystals, locate it and focus on it.

Cross pulls out the list and reads it again.

seven candles, unscented

autumn leaves

a very sweet apple

a dreamcatcher

a way to light a magical fire

be in an universe as close as possible

Cross checks his list and bag and groans. He had only managed to get the apple and the leaves so far. this stupid universe only had a few very small and old towns and it is honestly getting on his nerves!

Cross had just been nervous about leaving this universe. He didn't know this one and just because he managed to jump to it didn't mean he would be able to do it again.

The phones had an extra feature to make it known to them if they were near the castle. it had lit up at this spot after quite a few universes that didn't do it.

Meaning he was not leaving it!

Agh. he could ask if Horror is having more luck and-

WAIT!

Cross looks back over his shoulder and sees Horror walk past.

Cross doesnt think and rushes after the large skeleton "Horror! wait up!"

horror blinks and looks over "Oreo?"

Cross pulls a face at the nickname but catches up to him "What are you doing here?"

Horror looks slightly sheepish as he rubs his neck "You know... regret... trying to get back..."

Cross frowns "Get back- wait... did you leave as well?!"

Horror frowns at him "As well?" then his sight finds Cross' bag and cross can see Horror take note of the items in there. Horror looks back at him with a frown "You can't make the jump either?"

Cross feels both better and worse. Maybe he isn't banned! Or at least he isn't alone in being banned! which just makes him feel like a jerk. He nods and groans "not having much luck with getting the things i need. only got the apple and the leaves..."

Horror blinks but gets a small half grin on his face which Cross thinks should be criminal with how goo- OKAY he is stopping that line of thought.

Horror calmly gets his phone and turns it to enable Cross to see the items in his inventory. a lot of foods and- oh! a sweet apple. and unscneted candles!

Horror keeps grinning "Seems like we are getting close."

Cross grins and nods as he walks with the taller skeleton "Any idea why we can't get in?"

Horror shrugs "multiple options. dunno which."

Cross nods as he looks down "Yeah i figured."

They walk and search together before a loud gasp and Cross is suddenly tackled form behind. Cross yelps as he loses his balance. The only reason he doens't fall over is because Hroror manages to catch both him and whichever idiot rushed into him.

"Criss-Cross! H!"

Ah. nevermind. Cross knows that idiot. Cross glares over his shoulder at the grinning Killer "Why would you tackle me?!"

Killer grins but the grin turns sharper then just friendly "Had to make sure you guys didn't up and leave again without a single fucking word Criss-Cross!"

Cross winces and looks to the side "Yeah... I guess..."

Horror looks guilty as well before looking at Killer "Why are you here? instead of at the castle?"

Now it is Killer's turn to look away and he shrugs "After all of you guys left I figured i would try it myself. the whole solo-rouge-vagabond dealio. I didn't like it. So I am going back ot Nightmare and see if he needs a right hand still...." more thoughtful "or maybe babysitter? If that whole shrinking thing kept up."

Yeah and that line causes more guilt than before. because they really just all left Nightmare alone to deal with whatever was affecting him. Instead of at least offering help as they should have as his henchman and teammates. Nope! instead they all just left!

Cross rubs his arm "Yeah... we are on our way back too... You got stuff for the ritual?"

Killer sighs "Only the lighter. But that is because i already had one."

Horror frowns at Killer "All of us? Dust too?"

Killer nods "Just walked away. not a word or grabbed anything as far as i know."

Cross covers his face "We are the worst. terrible people." thankless, untrustworthy, unloyal. Cross can think of quite a few more words to describe them.

"We knew that already."

Cross, and Killer for that matter, curses as he jumps back. Only to see Dust standing by them, hood up but face visible with his bored expression.

Killer is by now standing behind Horror and glares at Dust "Don't do that! My soul is already fragile!" the soul shaped floating soul wiggles but stays steady.

Dust raises a brow and looks unimpressed "Don't talk about others then."

Horror chuckles and smiles "Good to see you dust. join us?"

Dust nods "Can't make the jump. what are we mission still?"

Cross takes out the list and after comparing what they have they realise they are only mission the dremacatcher, which Dust pulls out of his pocket.

Cross gasps "Where did you find that? I checked every store!"

Dust shrugs "stole it."

... right. that is also an option.

They take the items outside of town and get it ready.

The dreamcatcher as base with the candles all around it. The leaves used to wrap the apple, the only use one and Horror eats the others as they work.

Killer holds up the lighter and after focusing for a moment flicks it. instead of the normal yellow flame a bright pink flame appears. Killer lights all the candles adn waits for a moment until the smoke circles one another. Last Killer lights the leaves enclosing the apple without disturbing the smoke trails.

The new smoke trail joins the other seven and the whole pile bursts into flames but no heat comes off it. the flame remains pink for a moment before turning purple and then turning black.

Killer grins and looks at Cross "cut away!"

Cross nods and cuts right above the flame and the universe shimmers. The smoke finds the small slice and fills it, moments later the flame and fire travels up towards the slide using the smoke and it opens a black portal, still smoking.

They rush through it and manage to get through it before the portal burns up.

Cross looks over his shoulder "And there shouldn't be anything left?"

Dsut shrugs "small pile of ash."

Killer grins "it burns up very quickly as soon as a portal is established."

Cross frowns as he looks around. they are in the late autumn forest around the castle. He can see the shadow of it in the distance. He starts walking and the other three join him.

Cross huffs "Still think it is a deceptively easy list..."

Killer shrugs "People don't expect there to be an easy way. Not like they will just test things until they hit jackpot." Then Killer grins wider "Not that anyone knows about Ngihtmare's sweet tooth. and no one knows about the apple, hell we don't even know it."

Cross nods as they walk through the forest. Cross can't help but feel like it feels... empty. Whcih is weird because Cross always knew there was nothing else in this universe or forest but them. but still it feels...different.

Horror seems to notice too as he glances around "feels weird..."

Dust nods immediantly "magic is different."

Cross nods as well "I noticed too..."

Whatever is going on it is big... because either it is affecting the universe, it is affecting nightmare enough that it affects the universe. or Nightmare is affected enough that he made these edits.

Hopefully they can clear all this up once they see Nightmare and apologise to him. The exit the forest and spot the castle in the distance.

Time to go talk wiht him.

*-----------------*

First and Prev Drabble Next Drabble

And as we all know, Nightmare wasn't there. woops. turns out that apology will have to wait a bit Cross.

And the tiniest bit of Bi-panic for Cross (I believe he canonly is Bi in like Xtale so he is still Bi here) ((And yes I am slightly hinting at BSP because I like them but They are kinda too busy to really focus on that in these drabbles but there some interest! but it can also be seen as pureply platonic with just some curious interest honestly *shrug* It is june after all!))

[unexpectedbrickattack]

Waitin for this damn plane to take off

[lesbin]

read something the other day that might be useful to other people w anxiety.

saying 'i'm okay' when you're feeling anxious signals to your brain that it's wrong to feel how you feel. it's dismissive and won't help you in the long run.

instead, say 'i'm safe'. it's far more comforting. you're not denying or trying to suppress your anxiety. you're making space for it while simultaneously acknowledging that you are going to get through the bad feelings. you might be anxious but nothing is going to harm you. you're safe !

[disability-can-be]

no earplugs: overstimulation

earplugs: anxiety

one earplug: worst of both worlds

[froody]

my dad just texted me today in the middle of my little breakdown (in all fairness he didn’t know I was struggling) and was like “I think I have generalized anxiety disorder.” (I as in him, not me.) like……brother you sure weren’t anxious about cheating on your wife with multiple women. not the slightest display of nervousness, guilt or regret about that one.

[rat-rosemary]

I love how this in this event its really obvious how shy Sapnap is because he doesn't have anyone else as emotional support

[differenteagletragedy]

I bet Baxter is like an anxious dog on the fourth of July because fireworks always remind him of you. He's just sitting in his apartment with the curtains shut shaking.

[i-amtransexual]

actually i think i shall choose anger today anyway crowley and aziraphale are both asexual and i am not going to include a statement saying all head cannons are valid i dont give a SHIT they're ACE AS FUCK

[old-memoria]

I’m getting married tomorrow… it feels surreal

[normalcannibalism]

cleaned sketch

black and white version

[icewindandboringhorror]

"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"

I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming

[fiveredlights]

anybody got some super fluffy happy maxiel fic recs?

i’ve had a Very Bad Day and my brain won’t turn off and let me sleep this nightmare of a day off so might as well fill it with maxiel fics!