#lord in heaven i need to poop help me please

[channelbomb]

i’m constipated

[jeyramarie]

boat ride- pogues x carrera!reader

summary: the hottest day of the summer turns into the best night of your life

a/n: little something i thought of couple weeks ago👀 sorry my writing has been so mia lately it’s just that nursing school is not joke 😂 but hopefully next thing i post is part 3 of my jd fic with @ilovefandoms102 so stay tuned guys! happy reading everyone 🦋

The hottest day of the summer came to Outer Banks making every single person leave their house. Everyone went to the marsh or the beach or in the kook’s case, their own private pool.

You were technically a kook, being Anna and Mike’s daughter, Kiara’s sister... yeah, you were a kook but didn’t really identified as one. Just like your sister, your days consisted on being with the pogues. Everyday, all day, for many years. Today, it’s wasn’t any different but the heat cause y’all to get up extra early (which rarely happens) and go to the beach.

“Y/N! Come on, they’re already outside!” Kie shouted from her room to yours gathering the last things for her backpack.

“Can you at lest help me tie my swimsuit?! I’m not an octopus, Kiara!” you yelled back feeling extremely annoyed at how your sister was scolding you for taken long, yet she didn’t help you get ready faster. She walked into your room and tied your swimsuit, all that was left was your shirt. When Kiara ran out of your room she quickly grabbed the pack of gum that was on your dresser.

“Kiara! That’s mine, i told you to buy some last week!”

“Well now it’s mine! Let’s go!” she screamed from her room and ran downstairs, you stayed in your room for a sec taking a deep breath.

“Lord, give me patience.” you whispered while your eyes were closed and your head tilted to the ceiling. You grabbed your bag and sunglasses making your way to your bedroom door. You closed and then saw that Kiara’s was still open so, as the good sister you are, you closed it for her.

When you made it outside to the driveway JJ was standing outside of the van, playing with his lighter. He looked up at you and smiled, giving you a wink. You blushed and looked at the floor, taking a piece of hair away from your face and behind your ear.

“Never thought you’d show up.” JJ chuckled putting his lighter in his pocket.

“Well it was all Kiara’s fault, she didn’t help... at all!” you screamed at her making her roll her eyes while taking a hit from her blunt.

“Can we stop at a gas station?....or a supermarket or something? Kie took my gum and i need to buy a new pack.” you whispered to JJ who was inhaling from his juul.

“We have to stop somewhere anyways.. we need beer.”

“Perfect, let’s go.” you got into the van and let out a yelp feeling a sting on your butt cheek. You looked over your shoulder and saw JJ covering his mouth subtilely while he laughed. You sat on the seat looking at everyone, saying hi and receiving many ‘good mornings’ while JJ closed the van door. Being the first ones on the beach had many incredible advantages. You guys had an incredible spot under a great tree and morning waves were the best waves of the day. Last but certainly not the least, the best part, there were no kooks or tourons around which is completely heaven for you guys.

“She really gonna put her stuff there?” you muttered to JJ while looking at your sister place her things under a particularly dangerous zone.

“Looks like she wants to get pigeon poop on her head today.” he laughed and continued walking with the cooler filled with ice and beers while you carried the bags with the food. The boys all went surfing while Sarah, Kie and you stayed behind catching some sunshine before going into the water.

“Now that the guys are gone.. i can finally talk about this, am i the only one that noticed JJ looking at Y/N like she was a piece of meat?” Sarah said while sitting up on her towel, turning to you and Kie.

“I was dying to talk about this! Y/N/N please tell me you noticed?” Kie smiled grabbing the fruit salad bowl from the cooler.

“I didn’t notice.. i genuinely didn’t see him.” you shrugged and looked out at the water finding the boys by the color of their swimsuits.

“He was literally eye fucking you.” Sarah laughed pulling her sunglasses out of her hair. Kie nodded while eating a apple slice making your cheeks turn red. You kept staring at him surf for a while not really believing what the girls have told you.

After a couple of hours at the beach, you all returned to the Chateau and got on the HMS yo go swim on the marsh until sunset. Everyone was swimming and drinking in the water while you were on the boat taking a small break. Tiredness took over you all of the sudden, you pulled your knees to your chest and hugged your legs.

“Hey, you okay?” JJ asked, grunting as he sat down next to you. You nodded smiling while looking into his blue eyes. He smiled too and let out a deep breath.

“Can i ask you something?” you whispered fidgeting with your fingers while staring out to the marsh, avoiding eyes contact with the pogue. He nodded and you looked down at your knees noticing small freckles on them cause of all the sun you take.

“Were you looking at me? on the way here?” he looked at you with wide eyes and ran his hand through his hair getting extremely nervous.

“How d-did you know?” he stuttered while his cheeks got red and his eyes got shiny. Your breath got caught up at your throat making you cough a bit, chocking one your beer.

“Umm.. the girls told me... i- i hadn’t notice.” you stuttered out looking at him watching him chuckle.

“Is that okay?”

“Yeah... it’s- um.. it’s completely okay, i-i just thought you wouldn’t like me like that.” you said laughing nervously and then biting your lip.

“What’s not to like about you?” he whispered looking down at his beer and then looking up at you. Both of your eyes had little twinkle in them like you were seeing the most beautiful thing on Earth. JJ started leaning in slowly which caused you to automatically lean in too. Your lips were about to to touch when the pogues climbed into the boat, laughing over something related to John B’s swim trunks.

The boat ride home was a bit quiet. Everyone was tired and Kie had fallen asleep on your lap while you played her hair. The Carrera residence dock was getting closer so you softly nudged your sister, shaking her a bit till she woke up and rubbed her eyes.

“We’re home bub.” you whispered, rubbing your thumb over cheek making her smile and then yawn. The boat came to a stop and Kie stood up, saying goodbye to everyone while stepping out of it. You were right behind her when you felt JJ grab your wrist making you turn to him.

“Would you... ummm.. like to... go..out... like on a date?” he stuttered scratching the back of his neck while his cheeks got red. You smile widely and nodded, then leaned in to kiss his cheek.

“I’ll text you okay?” he nodded and smiled, then your turned around walking down the dock. Kie was waiting for you in the middle, you jogged to her and wrapped your arm around her waist while her went around your neck. You both made your way to the house, feeling tired from everything you did during the day. You couldn’t stop smiling, thinking about JJ just made butterflies come to live in your stomach and that’s a feeling you’ve always to have.

taglist: @obxmxybxnk @o-b-x @a-wari @teenwaywardasgardian @a-golden-sunflower-vol-6 @x-lulu @jewel25 @the-unloved-person @sunsetsofanemoia @sexualparkour @lust-for-pan @obx-direction-sos @honeysuger @ilovefandoms102 @joshy-obx

[embracethecringeside]

OK, here's one: do you think that there's any genuine good in Rick? I can't make up my mind about that one. I don't think he's evil or a sociopath (a lot of fans called him that in the early days, that term is so misused), but his intense self-hatred seems to be the only redeeming thing about him. He must have some sense of morality because he knows he's done horrible things, but he makes zero effort to stop doing horrible things unless it benefits him somehow.

My short answer is yes, Rick has genuine good wrapped up in there but my full answer is a bunch of examples from the show that I would like to call Soft Sanchez moments, where Rick either does something good/says something real and genuine/or his goodness is talked about in some fashion.

Meeseeks and Destroy 

Morty: Look, I want to leave now. You win the bet, okay? (Searches Rick's lab coat for the portal gun) Just give me the portal gun and let's go, please!

(Rick sees the badly beaten Mr. Jelly Bean walk out of the bathroom and pieces together what happened)

Morty: Please, I just want to... go h-home. (Tears up and holds onto Rick)

Rick: Okay. Listen, Morty. I just won a bunch of shmeckels. Why don't we use 25 of them to pay slippery stair here for a ride back to the village, and then we'll give the rest of the shmeckels to the villagers, huh?

Morty: Really?

Rick: Sure, Morty. Yeah. You know, a good adventure needs a good ending.

Rick: Good job, Morty. Looks like you won the bet.

Morty: Thanks, Rick, but I don't know if I should. You know, you were right about the universe. It's a crazy and chaotic place.

Rick: Well, you know, maybe that's why it could use a little cleaning up every now and then, you know. This one's wrapped up neat and clean because we did it Morty style.

(They portal away, but Rick makes another portal back and sticks an energy pistol through it and shoots Mr. Jelly Bean, splattering him all over the screaming villagers)

A Rickle In Time

(Puts his own collar on Morty, who disappears) 

Rick: I'm okay with this. Be good Morty. Be better than me. Holy shit, the other collar! I'm not okay with this! I am not okay with this! Oh, sweet Jesus please let me live. Oh, my God I—I've gotta fix this thing, please God in Heaven, please, God, oh Lord, hear my prayers. Yes! Fuck you God! Not today, bitch.

Mortynight Run

Rick: Screw this. I’m out.

(Rick forms a portal and leaves through it. Morty tries to start the car as a Gromflomite approaches, but it stalls.)

Morty: Oooh…! Come on, come on!

Gromflomite: Get out of the vehicle made of garbage or we will open fire!

Morty: *still trying to start the car* Oh no no no!

Gromflomite: Open fire!

(A portal appears directly above the guards and water pours out of it, flooding the room. Another portal appears on the floor, and the water and Gromflomites are sucked into it. A third portal then appears and Rick emerges through it, walking up to the car.)

Rick: Stupid-ass fart-saving carpet-store motherfucker! *shoves Morty out of the driver’s seat and takes the wheel* Move!

Auto Erotic Assimilation 

Rick: You got that right. But... baby, listen. Y-you're talking about taking over planets and galaxies, you gotta... you gotta just... remember to let go sometimes, you know.

Unity (Administrator): I can let go! Hey, look! You see that town across the river? Watch this.

(Planes fly past and bomb the town, blowing it all up)

Rick: Whoa!

Unity (Administrator): Ha ha! Woot!

Rick: Whoa! That's not what I meant!

Unity (Administrator): [laughing] It's okay! It's okay, I evacuated! I evacuated the town, look!

Unity (Townspeople): Hey! Right here! We’re fine!

Rick: (laughing) Oh, that was awesome! My grandkids weren't in that town, right? A-are my grandkids alive? ... H-hey, my drink is empty

Get Swifty 

Rick: Take it from me, Ice. *burp* You can’t just *burp* float around space not caring about stuff forever.

Morty: Tammy… gross. Birdperson, you always stick up for Rick, but he doesn’t care about anyone but himself. He doesn’t think about the consequences of anything he does.

Birdperson: And as a result, he has the power to save or destroy entire worlds. And he is the reason you and I know each other. And the reason I’m alive at all.

Look Who’s Purging Now

Arthrisha: Wait, stop! Please, don't kill me! I-I never intended to harm you, I swear. I am trying to end the festival. W-w-what do you mean? I was going to use your ship to destroy the rich assholes that run our society and save my people from the horrors of this yearly festival.

Rick: I'm not here to judge. I'm just a guy from another planet. But this girl is one of your poor people, and I guess you guys felt like it was okay to subject her to inhuman conditions because there was no chance of it ever hurting you. It's sort of the socio-political equivalent of, say, a suit of power armor around you. But now things are evened out, so, Arthrisha?

Morty: I can't help but feel ashamed about what I did back there, Rick. I guess you were right. I've got a lot of repressed stuff. I need to deal with. 

Rick: Don't worry about it, Morty.Remember those candy bars earlier that we got in the first act? 

Morty: Yeah, what about them? 

Rick: Turns out they have a chemical in them called purgenol that amplifies all your violent tendencies. 

Morty: Oh, boy. Whew! Thank goodness for that, huh? That's a relief. 

Rick: Yep. Don't even sweat. You're still the same old Morty. Your character's totally protected. (camera pans out to reveal the label on the chocolate bars reads “now purgenol-free”)

The Wedding Squanchers

BirdPerson: The guest list at this wedding includes 17 of the federation's most wanted. We have committed numerous atrocities in the name of freedom.

Rick: But... but... Here's the thing. Birdperson is my best friend, and if he loves Tammy, well, then I love Tammy, too. (Cheers and applause) To friendship, to love, and to my greatest adventure yet... opening myself up to others.

The Whirly Dirly Conspiracy

Rick: And you know what? I’ll cop to it. I put a lot of strain on your marriage. It wasn’t fair. I’m sorry.

Jerry: What?!

Rick: I didn’t respect your marriage. I certainly didn’t do it any favors. And for what it’s worth, I’ll apologize to Beth for it when we get home. Whoo! Whirly Dirly! Yeah!

Pickle Rick

I’m trying to let the scripts show all the ways Rick is good before I jumped in but since this is really weird without just watching the episode I’ll just explain that Rick doesn’t kill Jaguar after he finds out he has a daughter and then they work together to escape. 

The Old Man and The Seat

Tony: Can I look at a photo of my wife while you kill me?

Rick: Sure, but I'm doing her a favor. She either has terrible taste, or she's trapped in a marriage to a toilet thief. 

Tony: She's dead. And I don't mind joining her. Life has been hollow since I lost her. Using your toilet was nice, though. I'm a bit of a shy pooper. I'm ready when you are. 

Rick: Stay there. (goes through a portal, comes back with another Tony) Tell him what you told me.

Other Tony: What is this? What's happening? 

Rick: Tell him what you told me. 

Other Tony: My wife's still alive. Sh... sh... she went into remission 10 years ago.

Rick: And what did you do today? 

Other Tony: Oh, I, uh, pooped on a really awesome toilet I found... Oh, ow, ow, ow, ow, oh! (Rick shoves him back through the portal)

Rick”: Don't use your dead wife as an excuse. You ( Bleep ) on my toilet because you don't know your place, and your place is nothing. So next time you stumble onto a toilet that feels too good for your ass, trust me, it is. 

Tony: You're not gonna kill me?

Rick: Don’t tell me what to do!

Tony: You can make a perfectly-realized, toilet-filled simulation of heaven, but you can't share a toilet? 

Rick: Don't insult my craft. The chemical is Globaflyn. It connects the whatever-you-want section of your brain to the whatever-you-have section. If your heaven is toilets, that's on you. 

Tony: All of these people... 

Rick: Are living their wildest, meaningless dreams and leaving me out of them.

Tony: People you refuse to kill and refuse to let into your life.

Star Mort Rickturn of the Jerry

(Rick reveals he has saved what he could of PhoenixPerson)

Okay and on to the big one where I am actually going to talk instead of just letting the script go off Rest and Ricklaxation. We see two sides of Rick, Healthy Rick and Toxic Rick. After Healthy Morty slaps Healthy Rick, and he slaps him back, he discovers the machine doesn’t actually know the difference between what is truly healthy and whats actually toxic, it goes by each person’s individual definition. Shortly after we as the audience learn that Healthy Rick? Is actually apathetic. He doesn’t care about others. All the caring and emotions are wrapped up in Toxic Rick. Everything Healthy Rick did and said is all stuff he believes are good, he apologies, he takes responsibility for his actions, he’s polite, he’s trusting, and he doesn’t try to control others, but he is doing all of this simply because he thinks he should. So it is completely selfless when he makes the bargain so Toxic Rick will merge with him, because, and he even says it, he hates having what he considers his toxins inside of him, but it’s the right thing to do.

Then of course Healthy Rick calls Toxic Rick out, knowing that he is the one with all his, “irrational attachments” as he puts it, and as much as Toxic Rick no longer wishes to be a part of Healthy Rick, he merges with him under the pretence that he will then be able to save Toxic Morty. Both act selflessly for different reasons, Healthy Rick believing it is the right thing to do, while Toxic Rick does it for Morty. 

So do I believe that there is good in Rick?? Heck yes!! Good is stored in the garbage grandpa! 

[jean----ralphio]

Episode 6 of my BoB watch!

Episode 6: Bastogne. AKA Jean----Ralphio is not and will never be ready for this shit.

Guys. I can’t do this. I can’t do this ep. I HAVN’T EVEN PUT THE DISC IN AND IT ALREADY HURTS.

02:18 Noooo I can’t.

03:59 Oh Roe ILY <3 The only good thing about the ep is frequent close-ups of Shane Taylor’s face.

04:54 Baby, aw. They’re cold <3

05:14 Awww be careful

05:25 Aw he puts his hand on his gun as he runs, I never noticed that before

05:45 God, Dick why would you willingly do that to yourself

06:07 Dick. DICK. YOU PROTECT HIM WITH YOUR LIFE DO YOU HEAR ME!

06:19 Wtf is this idiot squatting in the road for like that? Is he pooping??

06:38 LMAO Dick still has shaving cream on his face. He’s such a boss tho

07:01 “Give it to me straight!” He can’t, his husband is like a metre away

07:21 Nix is like Dick come back to bed. Oh shit Grandpa’s here.

07:38 Sure, Nix, you “took a walk along the line” at 3am, suuuureeeee that’s what you were doing, buddy…

07:48 Lol @ Roe blatantly eavesdropping. He’s so pretty they just let him.

08:36 Love how Dick just hands his stuff over immediately, no questions. So selfless <3

09:31 Shane is so pretty OMG

09:46 I love Spina’s funny hat

10:01 Could Dike be any more useless?

10:13 Lip is an angel <3

10:47 Say it with me guys, “SIZZUHS.”

11:01 Oh God.

11:06 RICH. RIIIICCCHHHHH <3

11:10 PUT YOUR HELMET BACK ON RICH OR SO HELP ME!

11:17 Aw he gave Roe his morphine. Rich <3

11:48 Roe found his BF at last <3

12:01 Penk!!!

12:19 Hey Bull <3

13:05 He’s so authoritative, unf

13:22 Aw baby

13:32 I wouldn’t pass judgement, Babe, you legit just whacked your helmet on a tree branch

13:59 Babe, run, baby

14:37 Ah, the iconic Hinkel scene.

14:38 Rich, close your mouth when you eat/laugh

14:49 Ricccchhhh <3

14:56 “I won’t eat Malarkey!” Does anyone else get the feeling he improvised that? LMAO I bloody <3 you Rich

14:59 Aw, Roe, join in baby

15:19 His smile <3

15:49 Good of Dike to hand over his kit. He wasn’t mean, just incompetent.

               “What happens if I get hit?”

               “I’ll be there, sir.”

Roe, we’re all already fucking in love with you, stop being so perfect. He’s an angel. Speaking of, where is Shifty, my angel son? Haven’t seen him in ages, I miss you Shifty <33333333

16:05 Babe do NOT get mad at him! Also yes keep undoing your fly please.

16:23 Oh Roe <3 He’s so stressed

16:47 His happy little face, I can’t

17:02 Smokey’s got all the goss, I love it

17:23 Ah my Joe/Charlie <3

17:38 “Where are your boots?”

               “In Washington, up General Taylor’s ass.”

GIVE ME ONE, OK, ONE, JUST FREAKING ONE JOE/CHARLIE LINE THAT IS NOT FUCKING ICONIC. YOU CANNOT.

18:18 lol Roe <3

18:48 Isn’t that the hot guy from Battlestar Galactica? Is it??!! I think it is!! Hey Lee! <3

19:03 Ah, Bill

19:04 Buuuuck <3

19:10 Still a bit batty, huh? We love you Buck

19:34 Roe omg <3 His voice tho

20:05 Skinny, baby! Noooo!

20:35 Aw, good boy Skinny

20:47 Perconte shut up! Stop bitching!

21:30 LMAO at Skinny’s hilarious little “Yeah, watch the leg!”

22:00 LOOK, ITS A WOMAN! AHHH RENEE, WE STAN <3

23:05 Lord, what a horrid situation

23:09 LMFAO Skinny! Alcohol and two women! “I’m in Heaven, Doc,” ah he’s so cute!

23:18 His smile <33333 Shane stop.

24:13 The framinnnggg of this shot you guys <3

24:37 So. Cute.

25:10 RICH! Trolling as usual

25:38 RIICCCHH

25:51 Good idea, Johnny. Notice he’s not bitch-facing

26:14 This shot is so iconic

26:39 No, Julian, honey, DO NOT STOP MOVING WHEN YOU ARE UNDER FIRE. Oh God.

27:05 Look. All I’m saying is that if Johnny wasn’t pinned down by enemy fire he would completely single-handedly take out their entire unit.

27:38 Julian ☹ Babe ☹ ☹

28:08 Hey Fassy!

28:22 Babe, oh God </3 He’s so desperate to get to him, I can’t

29:15 Baabbe honey ☹

29:50 RICH <3

30:05 Dick <3

30:13 Bull <3

30:17 Aw, Dad’s here, kids, it’s OK

30:23 Babe, sweetie you’re breaking my heart

31:03 Aw Roe is looking for Babe <3

32:01 DO NOT bitch @ Roe, Joe/Charlie, or you and I will be having words no matter how much I love you

32:28 AW BABE WENT LOOKING FOR ROE <33333 IT’S TRUE LOVE YOU GUYS

32:31 “Got you,” and then that smile. God he’s in love.

32:42 Babe, sweetie, he’s trying to court you with chocolate and cuddling, pay attention

33:00 He has to freaking guide him to eat omg

33:28 Awww, look they’re talking! Yay for foxhole bonding!

34:39 Spina’s such a sweetie

35:30 They’re so pale and cold omg babies

36:35 Roe and Lip look so happy! I want that shot framed

37:14 YAY!

38:30 Oh dear

39:01 Aw Renee

39:09 That look tho

39:26 Don’t scare her, Roe, she’s upset enough

39:33 He’s even more hot when he’s mad

39:51 Not the best first date but God they’re cute

40:28 His hair <3

40:57 They are so sweet. I would ship it if it wasn’t for Babe

42:37 Oh for crying out loud, Buck, honey…

42:46 Bill is such a mood

43:27 Roe is so cute omg

43:35 “He once called me Edward.” That was like yesterday, sweetie but OK. Ahaha I love it, the shock pulls Buck from his crazy.

43:43 Briefly

44:48 Smokey <3

44:54 Oh, Roe, sweetie

46:25 I have no words for how frantic and scary and hopeless this feels ugh

46:52 Cute

48:01 Renee is a literal angel

48:13 Oh Roe </3

48:40 Babe, so romantic!

48:42 RICH <3

48:55 Eat, Roe, come on

49:40 Rich, I see you!

50:23 Well, it lifted everyone else’s spirits, except Roe’s…

51:58 Oh, Buck, my dude you are not in good shape

52:08 RICH <3

52:53 Hoob you weirdo <3

53:11 “We’re in a dell.” Iconic Harry is back.

53:35 The way Dick instantly moves to protect Nix, you can’t deny the Winnix husbands

54:18 “OK get up, not OK lie down!” Lol Babe

54:35 Baby, wake up, come on

55:44 Dick is the best dad

56:19 Oh God, this isn’t good

56:44 Oh no

57:30 It’s not her body, just her scarf, and SHE’S TOTALLY FINE OK SHE GOT AWAY AND IS FINE

58:40 The way he trudges single-mindedly until he gets to Babe, I can’t.

58:52 LMAO at Dike getting told off in the background and Dick chilling and watching

59:53 It’s so painfully poetic. It’s what Renee would want. She’d tell you herself BUT SHE’S BUSY BEING FINE SOMEWHERE ELSE WHERE SHE’S SAFE AND FINE

1:00:13 THE FLIRTING AHHHH <3

1:00:28 So. Cute.

1:01:16 “No member of the 101st has ever agreed that the division needed to be rescued.” LMAO YOU ICONIC BASTARDS, I LOVE YOU <3

 To conclude, this episode is a piece of shit and I hate it because it just hurts so bad, OK! Real talk, honest to God one of the best episodes of anything ever.

[evelynhug0]

my reaction to this juicy fanfic chapter 

okay here we go

this chapter will contain some scenes i really loved and also MORE than that oh my god i am nervous af i feel sick

okay i gotta calm down

fuck ah i am so nervous

i want to cry already

What followed was the happiest time of my life. – i already wanna cry reading this

i am emotional already

She would still help me rehearse my lines after a day on set but now we would do it in bed or on the couch, my head in her lap as she caressed my head. – why are you doing this to me??????? why?????????

we would gravitate around each other like satellites: she was my North Star and I was hers. – help me oh lord

We were shamelessly happy behind our closed doors in our personal safe Heaven. We would kiss without a care until our lips were sore and we greeted the New Year drinking ridiculously expensive champagne and making out in her bathtub. – i want to jump out of the window i swear oh my god i cannot deal with this i cannot deal with this

wear each other’s clothes – bruh… bruh… why….

Evelyn was particularly fond of a forest green cardigan of mine, even if it was a bit tight for her – and we all know why it was a bit tight

(now i have images in my head please help)

I can still see her walking around the house wearing it over her bare skin and lingerie. – why would you do this to me? i want to get so drunk that my brain stops working

GAY SCREAMING TILL MY VOICE STOPS WORKING

I want to kick Don and Ruby

“Yes but not together, of course.” – ouch this hurts

this is unfair

i wish they could have been together publicly (is that how you say it idk)

and if I can’t go with you at my arm, I prefer to go alone. – not me having tears in my eyes

She flashed me one of her shy soft smiles that would turn my knees into butter and reached across the table for my hand. She squeezed it gently. “You know I wish I could go with you so badly…” – you wanna make me cry right? right? because my eyes are filled with tears right now and my heart hurts A LOT i can tell you A LOT 

But please stop doing it. – i am getting a stomach ache when i read this

We are so not done – okay everyone i need more vodka. also i am trying so hard not to cry

this is all so moving

my heart hurts that they have to hide

i think this is why i am on the verge of a breakdown right now

one more thing like this and i will cry my heart out

kissing me as if to prove her point – very good, i like that

“Shit, Evelyn, you almost gave a heart attack” – celia, i feel ya bro

ignore me at Audience Appreciation event. – evelyn, bro, please stop torturing celia and me

please wear something awful so I won’t be tempted to look at you. – hmmm yes good i like this

Evelyn could barely keep her hands off me. – not me going from crybaby to horny baby in a second when reading this

take me to church

The whole time I was aching to look at Evelyn, stunning as usual in her signature green dress – fck fck fck fck fck fck vodka

I pretended to be surprised: “Oh, is she here? I didn’t notice”. – ouch 

my eyes found her – oh lord

Ironically, that’s the only award where both of us were present, although avoiding each other. – this makes me sad again GREAT

Evelyn shook her head at me, amused. – MY BABIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!¨¨

i want to puke i am so nervous

here it is… THE sentence… oh lord… vodka

my babies

gay screaming

i want to puke

gosh this makes me wanna cry and scream

any sign of amusement on her face immediately melted away. I’ll never forget her words. – holy shit!!! well i will also never forget them hehe 

gosh my babies

this scene is so fucking adorable i want to jump out of the window i cannot deal with it

noooooo they should have kissed again

the thought of them kissing till their lips almost fall off make me go !!!!!!!!!!!

Her words stayed with me always and pushed me through every step of the way – SIGHHHHHH

omg celia is so anxious that i get anxious too hahahaha

I hate Ari have I mentioned this

gosh i would have thrown up if i was celia

how did she not poop her pants or faint???

aww i feel sorry for Evelyn

I hate Ruby

stupid biatch

she has always been a forgettable actress – haha yes indeed

ruby who?

“You did it! Holy shit, you did it!” – I love Harry & Celia together

my little gays <333333

don’t touch her Ari!!!

Ruby complimented me, coldly and surely against her will – yeah biatch in your face

awww celia, my little baby

i love you

I certainly meant though what I said next. – bro!!!!!

“And to Evelyn Hugo. Thank you.” – AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!! I LOVE THIS !!!! ICONIC!!!! I LOVE THIS MOMENT!!!! AAAAAAAAAAH SO BEAUTIFUL!!!! I CAN TOTALLY SEE AND HEAR HER SAYING THIS

I AM IN THIS FUCKING OSCAR THINGY TOO MAN I CAN FEEL EVERYTHING IT IS ALL SO “ALIVE”

I wanted Evelyn – not me doing the “evelyn move” when i read this

we all know what is going to happen next

i cannot deal with that

damn

i mean they all know celia is on top of the world especially now that she has won the oscar… but little do they know about the private party she will celebrate afterwards oh lord

i need vodka

i cannot deal with this

Georgia Peach aaaaaaaah

dear lord please help me i don’t want to die now

Celia, with all due respect, you’re not my type. – ahahahahahahaha (but she’s mine)

And there was only one thing I wanted: to be with Evelyn. – screaming crying throwing up

FUCK I AM SO NERVOUS

NO NO NO NO 

OH MY GOD

what i hate is: once i have read it, i will have read it you know??? I WANT THIS KIND OF SCENES FOREVER SO I WILL ALWAYS HAVE A NEW “SURPRISE” AAAAAAAAAAAAAAhhhhh

i am dumb

okay here we go

I have places to go too, you know – very gay, love it

heheh i have always wondered how she got in the house but now i know

flashing her a teasing smile – holy mother of god please help me

my heart is beating like crazy

i am feeling like a drug addict i swear

i love this feeling

i want it to never ever stop

She smiled back at me, ecstatic. – hmm i need to open windows it is very warm in here suddenly

THIS TENSION I SWEAR

IT IS KILLING ME

not me being a useless horny bi

She laughed and kissed me, cupping my face. – this is like the best movie ever… i can see everything as if it was a goddamn movie playing in front of me

Evelyn was perfection, it was like studying a Picasso…and she was the woman I loved. – i am having a heart attack

why can’t i feel my legs… is this anxiety or vodka

this tension and this love… i am dying

I was touched and filled with so much love for her. – BRO I WANT TO CRY

IT IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN… 

IT IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN

FUUUUUUUUUUUCK

I NEED TO GET MORE VODKA

I AM NOT READY Y’ALL I AM NOT

OKAY HERE WE GO

 I AM SCREAMING ON THE INSIDE Y’ALL HAVE NO IDEA

i want to vomit

ok now for real

my heart beats like crazy

but i can do it

here we go

BROOOOOOOOOOOO WAAAAAAAAAAAAT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

OH MY GOD

I AM DOING THE EVELYN MOVE

AND IT WAS ONLY A KISS SO FAR

I AM HAVING A STROKE

this tension oh my god i am going to vomit

unzipping my dress, slow and teasing. I knew she was watching me and the mere thought of it turned me on. – HOLY FUCKING SHIT I AM HAVING SUCH A STROKE NOW THE STROKIEST OF THE STROKES

f u c k

FCKFCKFCKFCK

I HAVE NO WORDS 

THIS TENSION

GOOD GOD

VODKA

MY HEART BEATS SO FAST

I WILL PUKE

NOT ME SIGHING LIKE CRAZY NOW HAHA

I AM HAVING A STROKE

GOODBYE WORLD

I NEED CHURCH

bro

i need help

therapy

help

my head is exploding

this chapter leaves me wanting more

oh my god

i am blushing like crazy

my face is all red and hot

my head hurts hahaha

i am having a stroke

I AM GOING TO DIE

goodnight

bro

i have no words

my head is empty

holy mother of god

goodbye

[who-let-the-deans-out-doctor-who]

For my friend, @darcymikaelsonblog, she’s 19 today, happy birthday you bitchy cakepie. Second chapter should be done tomorrow.

Birthdays are made for confesions

AN: Castiel/OC, Dom!Castiel, Sub!OC, part 1/2

It was really nice day. Mondays don’t tend to be nice for lots of people, but Martha loved them, so she told me anyways. Especially this one, because it was her birthday. She was wondering (her eyes glinted with anticipation, as she was talking), what she’s going to get from Sam and Dean. Our last hunt was last week in New Orleans - wendigo was slayed by the time of lunch, so they thought about buying some “girl stuff” as they called it, there. But we decided against it, because I wanted to buy her something special, because she was special and deserved more, than just some clothing or jewels. So when we came with nothing until thursday, we had a “family meeting” as Dean called it. We sat by the table in the main room in bunker and discussed what came to our minds. Martha was, fortunately, away, she said she’s having a “girls nights out” with Jane and that she’d be back on sunday. I was tempted to fly to her to check if she’s okay, but she didn’t like it, when I was, apparently, sneaking on her. She gave me this “talk about personal space” like Dean. 

“What about some hair product?” Sam started.

“That would be nice gift.” I said. In the corner of my eye, I saw Dean rolling his eyes.

“No, she’s not some ordinary Joe, it has to be something awesome and long lasting, hair products tend to disapear after just few months of using. In your case weeks, Sammy.” Sam’s face scrunched in his favourite manner, something that I heard Dean calling “bitchface”. It was not a good term for him to use, not especially for his own brother’s face, but I noticed they didn’t mind using vulgarisms on each other. Or on me. I’m starting to get used to it.

“Then enlighten me and suggest something already!” Sam shouted and Dean snorted at this. I frowned. Is there something funny?

“I don’t know anything about gifts for women, okay? I never gave anything to anyone, except you and dad. You are the same case. Cas too. Or am I wrong, Cas?” He turned to me and I shook my head.

“No, Dean, you’re unfortunately right. We have to ask someone, who knows what kind of gifts tend friends to give to someone special. What about this friend of yours, Charlie Bradbury?” I suggested. 

“That’s good idea, I wanted to check on her anyway. So, get this, I’ll take the Impala and find out what she knows and you guys can borrow my laptop and do some research on net.” When Dean wanted to interrupt, Sam points his index finger on him and raises his eyebrows.

“I’ll be back in mo. Don’t worry about baby, you know I can take care of her.” When he started to walk away, Dean shouted: “bring some pie!” after him. 

“Stupid research, well, let’s go to my awesome brother’s room. I’ll make a mess in there, then he’ll never give me research on his laptop ever again.” Dean muttered while we were walking in the hallway. He went to the kitchen and grabbed beer and tuna sandwich. I frowned, because he doesn’t like fish meat, but I let it go, maybe he wanted to try new flavours. 

When we reached Sam’s bedroom, I heard someone’s whispering my name. I stopped on door’s threshold and tried to catch who belongs to that voice. I suddenly felt ill feeling in my stomach. Something is happening. Something bad. And it’s happening to Martha. Her voice grew louder and by the time I was trying to found her exact location, she was shouting for help. I wanted to fly off immediatly, but I remembered Dean was here and he’ll be disapointed if I abandoned him without word.

“Dean, something is happening to Martha, I’m going to help her. You stay here.” I calmly said and hoped he won’t object. But he proved me wrong.

“No way, Chuckles, take me with you as a back up. If she’s in trouble, I want to help. And what if Jane’s in danger too and you wouldn’t have time to save both of them. I’m goin’.” He came in front of me with Ruby’s knife in his hand and waited for my fingers to land on his forehead.

We landed in some dark place. It looked like some old factory. Dean was clutching his abdomen and muttering “I’ll not poop for week again.” Suddenly, I heard scream behind me and I turned around. Someone jumped at me and tried to bite my neck. Vampire, to be exact. I easily throwed it away and heard how the beast screeched from pain. He got up and lunged at me again, but this time I had my angel blade in my hand and with one movement his head was no longer attached to body. His blood stained my trenchcoat, later I’d clean it with my grace. 

I took down two more and I glanced at Dean’s direction to make sure he’s alright, but he was already going to check the other rooms for Martha and Jane. We hadn’t heard any sound since then, it was “deadly silence” as someone calls it. Dean opened a few doors, before someone attacked him. I rushed to him, ready to slice head of this girl, her head already in the crook of his neck, but I recognised her hair. It was Jane. I was wrong, she was not biting him, she was hugging him, actually. Dean was disoriented for a minute, before he hugged her back. 

“I’m so glad you two came, if not, she’d be dead. Or a vampire.” Jane’s voice was barely recognisable for her closeness to Dean, but I heard her. I inhaled sharply and looked around.

“Where is Martha?” I asked and walked behind Dean to see her face. She had red face, probably from crying, the tears were drenching Dean’s shirt.

“She’s in that room, unconscious, but she’s okay, they just knocked her on head when she struggled too much. I checked her breathing and she’s alive.” She mumbled and I went to this dirty storage room, that she pointed her finger on. I hardly saw anything, but I could make out a body laying on the ground. I crouched beside it and it was truly Martha. Her face was bloodied and she was pale, but she was alive. 

Happiness flooded through my being and I was surprised to feel it. My vessel’s heartbeat sped up for no reason (or so I thought) and I was compelled to touch her soft hair. This feeling was something I’ve never felt before. It was similar to what I felt when I was human and April looked at me, when she was pretending to have interest in me. Or when Nora asked me if I was free for day and I thought it was a date. But this was stronger. This was craving for her, for my friend to become my lover. 

I shook my head and pushed the feelings away. This is not the right time. Two of my fingers touched her cheek and I tried hard to not enjoy the softness of her skin. My grace travelled from there to the wound and healed the broken cells. She gasped and opened her chocolate eyes. When she saw me, she smiled. I couldn’t help myself to smile back and I offered my hand for her to take it. When she took it with her cooler and smaller hand, my senses tingled. 

“Thank God, you heard me. Thanks, Castiel.” Shiver went down my spine, when she said my name. What is wrong with my vessel? Maybe it was because she was always calling be by nickname Dean gave me. Why she used my full name was not clear to me. I suddenly remembered the state of my clothes and cleaned them with my power of heaven.

I helped her up, but she wasn’t completely okay, she certainly had concussion. So when her legs gave out, When I grabed her under back and knees, she yelped in surprise, and I carried her away from this beast hole. 

Jane was still clinging on Dean and I smirked. They were adorable as bunnies in winter, hugging themselves for little warmth. 

“Let’s go, hold tight.” I said before I carried us back home. To the bunker, I mean. I can’t call it home, because there was always chance that it would be destroyed. But I can call home wherever Winchester brothers and these two girls were. Even if it was just laying in the field under stars. I imagined Martha’s face in starlight. That would be the most precious sight I’ve ever seen. 

My dreams were interrupted by Dean complaining about his digestion. I rolled my eyes, for his moaning was not of importance. 

Then I remembered that Martha was still in my arms and my insides clenched. Her soft skin under my fingers was making my vessel’s temperature grow and breath quick. Her shirt was loose and had no sleeves and so my hand was on her bare shoulder. I tried to not look at her, but vessel’s curious eyes were soon travelling across her face. She looked flustered, her pale skin was tainted with red. We shared a few moments, just staring at eachother’s very souls. 

“What are you two, frozen? Or you want to be alone?” Dean’s voice broke our trance. I ignored him and instead stealthed my grip on Martha’s fragile body.

“My mistake, I should put you in your bed, you need to rest.” She wanted to protest, but I hardened my gaze and her lips closed with defeat. I moved to go to her chamber, leaving Dean and Jane alone. 

When  I kicked the door open, she yelped. I found that really cute.

“My apologies, I didn’t mean to scare you.” 

“You didn’t scare me, I just didn’t expect it. Well... Cas, can you put me down?” I looked at her, stunned at her question. My vessel’s brain apparently shut down and I couldn’t move. 

“Cas? Are you okay? You’re not hurt, are you?” She raised her hand to my shoulder and touched it. I gasped, finally able to do something, even if it was to do the opposite of what I intended. 

“Sorry, I was just thinking. I should put you to bed and then you’ll sleep.” I said authoritatively and done what I’ve said. I reached for covers and layed them on her to warm her. When I turned to leave, she catched my hand and pulled me towards her.

“Can you please stay? I’m cold.” Indeed, her hands were cooler than ice and I didn’t like it. My mind was telling me it’s a bad idea, but I couldn’t left her with so low temperature. She could catch flu. Yes, she’ll have discomfort if I left, she’d be better when I lay down and... lord, take her form from behind to press her back to my chest. Vessel started to sweat from nerves. 

These feelings were very uncharastical for me. I’m an angel of the lord and fear one girl.One really beautiful and special girl. I should put end to this by resolving the sexual tension and ask her to copulate with me. I’m not afraid. What can I loose? Oh, that’s right, her friendship. I should start with kissing her. It’s what humans do, when they’re expresing their love for each other, or am I wrong?

So I took her hand and kissed the back of it. She gasped softly and turned to face me. That made things easier.

“Martha, can I kiss you?” I asked bluntly. She chuckled, she perhaps thought that I’m joking. When she saw, that I’m not, her smile slipped away.

“You mean it?” Her eyes shined again with that glint, but there was something else entirely. Wanting, longing. 

“Yes. I’d like to have our friendship become more. I want you to be my soulmate, partner, love. If you don’t feel the same way, I’ll accept it. Our relationship will remain untouched like it is. But if you want more, I want to kiss you. Can I, Martha?” Her pupils were large and the brown of her eyes disapeared for moment. I was lost in her stare and she was closing distance between us. 

“Why are you still talking? Shut up and just kiss me, you dork.” She smiled again and I gazed at her lips for a moment. They were soft looking and pink. No, red. Something inbetween. I gave up to her spell and sat up a little, just to get on top of her and kiss her passionately. 

“So, you like to top? Can a dork like you dominate?” She teased, at first I felt offended, but then I remembered that there was thing called “pillow talk” and “dirty talk”. I’d rather use first one, because second one needs proper research.

“Yes, I can. I was a leader of an army, so you-” I grabbed both of her wrists and pinned them above her head, “-are under my control now.” Her breathing sped up and I figured out, that she liked to be dominated. So I tightened my grip on her hands and kissed her again, this time with all lust I kept inside. She moaned and I felt my vessel’s reproductive organ flowing with blood. 

“You’ve been very bad girl today, Martha.” I trailed my kisses down her jaw and her throat. She was writhing under me, but I held her hips with my other hand. 

“Hold still. You don’t want to have it harder for you than you’ll have it now. As I said, you’ve done disobedience. And for that you have to be punished.” She hummed and and idea came to me.

“So your punishment is to wait with copulating until you get your birthday present from me.” I said in low voice and she looked at me with frown.

“Not that, Cas! Anything else, but not that! You started this, so you better end it now!” She pursed her lips to express her hurt, but I just smirked and kissed her lightly.

“Waiting and obedience would be rewarded, until then, I’m sorry.” And I flew off.

[settle-down-frohike]

OHOHOH! Can you please do the “Welcome to fatherhood.” prompt?

For the promp #37. “Welcome to Fatherhood”, and inspired as well by this lovely gifset courtesy of @wholeperson

Sorry I’m just now getting to this, anon. I try I really do, but I’m slow. 

Also I’m southern, and the linguistics are too. Apologies in advance. 

Paternitas

 Gordon County Hospital, GA

9:23 pm

 I lean against the wall of the break room, trying to center my thoughts and calm my breathing. 15 years as an L&D nurse and cases like that one never ceaseto shake me up. I need a cigarette. My heart is beating out of my chest and myhands are still shaking. It’s just adrenaline, I know.  I haven’t eaten since before I left home and my sugar is in the toilet. {I need food, not acigarette}, I think as I absent-mindedly rub the patch on my upper arm. {For the kids.} I’m doing this for the kids.  

 A debbie cake and a bottled water later, I pad down the hall to check on my patient.She’s out of surgery now, and it went well. God, just one tiny sliver ofplacenta can wreak so much havoc.  So much blood…. I wonder what in thehell happened to bring her in in such a state. A home birth gone wrong, maybe?No. She wasn’t even dressed in a nightgown. I guess it isn’t important now. Herpoor husband looked about as frightened as I’d ever seen. I think I heard theyarrived by chopper?? Not medevac, though.  Important folks, apparently.  They looked like they’d bothjust come from work, truth be told.  This patient assessment is going to be interesting.  

 When I get to the room the husband (? No ring I see) has exchanged his blood-saturated suit for a set of standard issue ‘dad scrubs’, and is sitting by her bed, studying mom’s face intently. He strokes a lock of hair from her face, leaning in and murmuring something unintelligible. He sits back down in the guest recliner, still holding her hand as he brings it to his lips for the mosttender of kisses– once, twice. The gaze on her face is not broken. I wonder if he even blinks.

 He’s cute. Very. I shake my head at my inappropriate thought and proceed to the bedside with her chart in hand and a load of questions to ask, feeling contrite.

 Flipping back through my notes at the nurse’s station I kick off my crocs and hear mytoes crack. I’m only 40.. just, in fact, but tonight I’m feeling everyone ofthose years.  FBI….Huh. And his name isFox? Suits him… {Jesus, Susan. Get a grip.} This one’s clearly taken, old girl. What’s gotten into you? I need sleep, that’s it. I’m getting punch drunk already. This usually doesn’t happen til the end of my shift…

*Clearly* taken.

He never let go of her hand throughout any of the inquiries. He stroked her thumbcontinually with his, startling and glancing her way from time to time as ifhoping she’d stir, maybe thinking she had. I’ve seen my share of jittery new dads– but this one seems, I don’t know, for lack of a better word….. spooked.  Lost. Thrust into a foreign universe and flailing. It’s clear who is his anchor here.

When I asked if he was the father (he’s listed as such on the chart, but I’mrequired to ask for my notes) his eyes went wide and expressionless, and helooked at her again, as if waiting for an answer.  “Yes, yes” , he repeated,nodding, testing the words and lookingto her. I wrapped up my initial assessment, vitals strong, although her BP could come up a bit, capillary refill: good.  Bowel sounds present. No distension. No hint of fever or infection. All good signs. She could be out as early as a couple of days. Dad sits quietly close by, giving me space to work but not much more thanthat. His knee bounces with anxiety.

I finish quietly, wash and unfasten from my clipboard the standard pamphlets andliterature: birth certificate form, social security, “Getting to Know Your Baby”, “Welcome to Fatherhood”, “Mommy and Me: An Introduction to Breast Feeding”.  I hand them overwith a small smile and he glances down non-committedly before placing them onthe bedside table. He scoots the chair back close to her side and again strokesthe same wayward lock of hair from her closed eyelids, and again, kisses her hand.  The tender expression of adoration convoluted with worry is so profound and unabashed that I find myself staring, my face growing hot, but I thankfully recover quickly and begin to go over hercondition, letting him know what to expect when she wakes… she’s a fallrisk…she’ll need help to the restroom….call a nurse if you need one…he nods,nods.  I hope that at least some information will give him his bearings, a comfort perhaps, but I get the sense it has no effect at all. He hears me but I get the sense he’s just waiting on her.His eyes plead with her to wake, to tell him what to do. Apparently she’s an M.D., so she should pretty well know her way around things, at least until they bring the baby in.

Parenthood is tricky. No one really ever knows it all.  I think back to the birth of my first daughter. The elation, the fear, the absolutely necessity to have her at my side immediately and at all times.

He hasn’t yet asked to see his son.

Once they wheeled her in for the d&c he took off like a shot to the nursery,shouting questions of where and why over the child but I sense it was more for her knowledge than his need. He was a sentinel,utterly at her service, unconscious as she was, but he was also her proxy in every sense of the word.

He hasn’t been back there since, though.

Baby from what I hear is fine; APGAR was a 9, nuero: solid. Good thing, too. Had hiscondition deteriorated we would have had to transport him to a bigger facilitywith a NICU. Somehow I sense that separating these 3 would prove problematic. Thankfullythe nurses have been able to tending to the boy here with no trouble. Her milk is starting to come in though, and if she doesn’t wake soon I’ll need to requisition a pump.

2:30 am

 Time for vitals again. They’ve wheeled the baby in I see. And now there’s a man outside their room. A broad guy, balding and with glasses, looking stern but exhausted as well. I’m assuming a friend but he looks and acts like a bodyguard. He gives me a polite nod, but a suspicious once over as I enter the room. Dad is still at his station. Wide-awake. He should sleep, if he knows what’s good for him. Real life is about to hit and newborn induced sleep deprivation is entirely another animal.

 But, God, the way he looks at her. Utterly besotted. The intensity of his love  is all around him, a thrumming, golden aura, even as his body has begun to sway lightly in exhaustion.

 I hate to disturb them but her BP is still a bit low for my liking. We’ll need tocontinue pushing fluids. 

 "Hi there. Me again,” I smile apologetically. “Baby boy has joined y’all, I see?“ 

 "Yea, I uh, I wanted him to be here when she woke up.“ 

 I don’t comment that she may very well be out for the next 12 hours or so.

 "Well, the nurses fed him I’m sure, so you should have a few peaceful hours. Theymostly just sleep and eat at this stage. And poop.” I chuckle, but thejoke falls flat. 

 I need to make sure the baby’s nurse comes back for a diaper check. This guyisn’t ready.  I note the various monitors and change her bag. 

 "Would you like to hold him?“ That gets him to look right at me, with an unidentifiable expression.  He looks overat the bassinet, back to me and his mouth opens, but nothing comes out. He’s blinking furiously.  Bless. Indecisionand panic are clear as day in his eyes. But something else, too. He looks…guilty. It’s the strangest thing. I can sense that he wants to hold the baby but can’t bring himself to.

 He lowers his chin to his chest, pauses and swallows. “Um…no… I… I don’t wantto wake him."  All of my maternal inclinations are screaming at me to hug this poor boy, who isn’t a boy at all. I tamp down the urge, and decide instead to turn my attention to the baby.

 I lean over the to take a glance. They’ve got the room fairly warm so he’s loosely swaddled in addition to a hospital issued t-shirt and diaper. His arms curled above his head, snoozing away. He smells of clean laundry and lavender baby shampoo. Just a dusting of strawberry blonde hair, long lashes of the same shade. He’s got his daddy’s chin. I watch his lips and cheeks mimicking the suckling reflex. Oh heavens. I do miss this. "You won’t, don’t worry. Babies love to be held.  He might even sleep sounder that way.

Again he swallows. I won’t push.  

 "Y’all have a name picked out?“ I want to make friendly conversation, because Ifeel like this guy could use a friend, but mostly I want to leave. I feel awkward and oddly intrusive. Something about his room feels sacred in a way I haven’t encountered before.  And I’m trespassing.

 He blinks. As if the idea just occurred to him. "Um, no. No not yet.”

 "Well, never mind that. No hurry. He’s just precious,” I hug my clipboard to my chestand flash a nurturing southern grin, “Congratulations.“ Lord what a drawl.My accent really does get worse at night, especially deep into a shift. But I domean that, wholeheartedly.

 His eyes flit over to the baby, who’s begun to stir and whimper and then he glances up atme, alarmed. I walk over and place my hand on the tiny human’s rapidly rising and falling belly, and place a firm but gentlepressure there. I lightly jiggle and ‘shhhh…’ softly. He settles instantly andresumes his slumber.

I feel dad’s eyes on me. Yes, he loves this baby. His paternal, protective instincts are unmistakable .  And yet he holds back.  I smile over at him again, reassuringly. “See? Nothing to it, “ with a wink. No need for any hardcore parenting truths right now.

 As I gather my things and wish him a good night, tell him I’ll be back in a coupleof hours to recheck her vitals but I’ll try not to wake them, in case he wantsto rest his eyes for a while.  Somethingtells me he won’t.

He thanks me routinely and I turn to walk out. At the threshold of the door I hearthe plastic of the chair crack and I turn around, wondering if he needs anything.  His attention isn’t on me, but the baby, walking over to the clear bassinet and peering over. He hasn’t touched him yet, only gazes down at the newborn. Earnest curiosity quickly blooms into boundless wonder, and finally, an expression of such heartbreaking devotion that I feel my eyes begin to burn and a lump lodges behind my throat. I freeze. He gently mimics,exactly, his movements from earlier. He strokes the baby’s face, no hair to move but along side his cherubic cheek just the same. Then places a finger in the baby’s palm, which instinctually grips his father’s outstretched digit. He leans close, so carefully close, and places an impossibly soft kiss on the tiny hand, lips trembling.

 “Hi.”He mouths.

His face begins to crumple slightly and he gathers his entire bottom lip in histeeth, desperately trying to contain what’s so obviously a flood of emotion.

Feeling truly instrusive now, I make my exit asquietly as I can and scurry down the hallway.

 The whys and how’s of their appearance at this lonely small town facility are inconsequential, really. They are just parents now. New parents. With vast, phenomenal, uncharted waters lying ahead of them. And yet, something tells methey are well equipped for such territory. Call it experience, call it optimism, call it hope, call it what you will.

{Good luck you two}, I think, walkingtoward my station and yearning for my shift to end so as to return to my owntwo sleeping babies at home. 

Fin

[johnhardinsawyer]

The Only Label that Matters

John Sawyer

Bedford Presbyterian Church

10 / 8 / 17

 Philippians 3:4b-14

Matthew 3:13-17

 “The Only Label That Matters”

(How Do You Self-Identify?)

Well, it’s been a sad week in our community.  The TCBY store on South River Road has closed.  That’s right – the store that claimed to sell “The Country’s Best Yogurt” is no longer selling anything.  Just so you know, TCBY was not named “The Best” by any official yogurt-making or yogurt-tasting groups.  Nor was there any official nation-wide proclamation in which someone spoke for the entire country, declaring that TCBY was “The Best.”  Nope.  They gave themselves the title.  According to the “Fount of All Knowledge,” known as Wikipedia, TCBY used to stand for “This Can’t Be Yogurt,” but – because of a lawsuit – they had to change it. So, they went big and self-identified as the place that sells “The Country’s Best Yogurt.”[1]  It’s funny, sometimes, the way we label ourselves. . .

If you were asked to label yourself, based on who you think you are or who society says you are, how would you self-identify?  You might not start by saying that you are “The Country’s Best ‘Whatever’,” but you might say something about who your family is, what your ethnic background may be, where you are from, where you went to school, or what you do for a living.  Labels like this can be helpful, sometimes – they can help us understand a little bit about one another.  Someone might self-identify as a doctor or a teacher or a lobster fisherman, but they might also be a mother or a father, a poet or a veteran, or a barbecue master or a world-champion juggler.  You can put big stock into the labels that define you, but most of us are way more than any one label.

The Apostle Paul had a whole list of labels that could have defined him.  In fact, he gives that list in today’s reading from his letter to the Philippians. Paul had quite a pedigree:  he was from a religious family, descended from the small – but fierce – tribe of Benjamin (who could trace their roots all the way back to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob).  He was a religious leader in the Jewish faith and followed every letter of the law of Moses.  He was so passionate about following the law that he had even oppressed and pursued and imprisoned people whose beliefs were not up to snuff, religiously speaking.  To people within the Jewish faith – of a certain, strict persuasion – Paul was a really good person.  He was “blameless, without fault.”[2]  (Philippians 3:4b-6)  Paul very well could have been labeled “One of the Country’s Best Jews.”  He might have even given himself that label from time to time.

Paul had every reason to boast and be confident because of his status – the labels he had received by checking all of the right boxes, religiously and socially speaking. . .  But then Paul met Jesus, and Paul came to the realization that all of the things which had seemed so valuable and important to him didn’t add up to a hill of beans.  The word that polite Bible translators use to describe all of the things that had previously given Paul’s life meaning is the word “rubbish.”  But in the original language, the word that Paul uses here is the word for the kind of stuff that gets thrown out in a bag of dirty diapers, or scooped out of the kitty litter, or picked up by a dog walker whose dog makes a “deposit” on someone’s lawn.[3] 

“[W]hatever gains I had [because of my social status],” Paul writes, “these I have come to regard as loss because of Christ.  More than that, I regard everything as loss because of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.  For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things, and I regard them as rubbish – skubalon – in order that I may gain Christ.”  (3:7-8) 

“So you can take my family name,” Paul is saying here, “all of my awards and advanced degrees, my reputation, all my years of thinking that I was doing the right thing – and you can throw them out the window.  Because none of that stuff is important to me any longer.  In fact, when I think about it, all of the time and energy I spent on all of that stuff embarrasses me now.  It offends me.  I have gladly thrown it away because compared to knowing Jesus, all of that other stuff doesn’t matter anymore.  I have put it behind me.”

I am sure that there were some things that Paul wanted to put behind him – some labels he wanted to remove from his past.  At one point, back when Paul was known as “Saul” – he had stood by and watched as some people were killing a man named Stephen. The scriptures tell us that Saul held their coats and approved of what they were doing because Stephen was a follower of Jesus.[4]  Saul felt he was justified, but really, he was an accessory to murder.

There are those who self-identify in certain ways – those who hide behind their labels and will sometimes use those labels as a defense. People self-identify as being part of one group or another and use that to justify all kinds of things – even violence.

A few years ago, a young man named Jason was passed over for a job down in Virginia.  He became convinced that this had happened because he was a white male and then he read some things on the internet and became further-convinced that the white race is somehow being targeted for genocide.  This is not true – not in the slightest – but the labels that Jason used on himself made it feel true.  And in this day and age, “feeling” is often wrongly equated with “truth.”  Jason says that he is not a white supremacist.  He’s just pro-white.[5]  He claims there is a difference between the two.  But sometimes the labels we place on ourselves don’t have clearly defined edges. One label can slowly bleed into another without us knowing.  Anyway, Jason organized a rally for white people in his hometown of Charlottesville at which people were hurt and a woman was killed.  He says all of this is someone else’s fault – the fault of black people and women.

Sometimes, our labels become our idols and we worship them. We even make sacrifices to them, as if the ways we self-identify somehow give us power.  The Bible has more than a few things to say about idolatry, but Paul sums it up in one word:  “Rubbish!” Because there is only one true God who exists and only one true label that matters.  It is only by God’s grace that we come to know this.  I hope and pray that Jason will come to know it.

In today’s reading from the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus went to be baptized.  He didn’t self-identify as the “Messiah” or “Son of God” when he went, though.  John the Baptizer knew who Jesus was and would have prevented him, saying “I need to be baptized by you [Jesus]. . .” (Matthew 3:14) But Jesus insisted, and he humbled himself, and was baptized by John in the Jordan River.  As the story goes,

When Jesus had been baptized, just as he came up from the water, suddenly the heavens were opened to him, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him.  And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, the Beloved, with whom I am well pleased.”  (3:16-17) 

“This is my child.  I love him.  I am pleased with him.”

When someone comes to be baptized, we believe that they are marked with a sign – a label, if you will.  And this label from God reads, simply.  “This is my child.  I love them. I am pleased with them.”  This holy label is permanent.  It is a mark that won’t come off in the wash and there is nothing that will completely cover it up.  This mark is, in large part, invisible most of the time.  There are times when it becomes faint or worn, times when we forget about it, but it is always there.  

Many of you probably know the story of how Paul, back when he was known as Saul was going along the road to Damascus, on his way to arrest some followers of Jesus – and how, suddenly, he saw a bright light and a voice said, “Saul!  Why do you persecute me?”  (Acts 9:4) In that moment, something within Saul changed – he realized that everything he had been doing against the church of Jesus was wrong.  He also realized that even though he had been a sinner his whole life, Jesus still loved him. He became aware of God’s grace for the first time.  When Saul – completely blinded by his experience on the road – finally arrived in Damascus, he regained his sight and he was baptized.  After years of thinking that he belonged to God based on who his family was or how much he thought he was doing to be faithful, in his baptism, Saul found that all of the old labels no longer mattered.  God had wiped them away and had given him a new label – a label of love and light and hope and peace and healing and forgiveness and reconciliation. God had given him a new identity – a new way to self-identify:  “I am God’s child.  God loves me. God is pleased with me.”

Because of this grace, from then on, Paul only wanted to know Jesus.  He gave his life to Jesus and this is what defined him.  This is the label that he wore – the sign to the world that this, and only this, was the label that mattered.  “Christ Jesus has made me his own,” Paul says in today’s reading. (Philippians 3:12)  “And I am going to live the rest of my life trying to embrace this label – this new identity.  I will press on until the end because the end will be glorious.”  Paul didn’t always get it right.  He knew that he was a sinner and that he fell short all the time, but he knew that Jesus loved him even when he did fall short.  This is the kind of grace that we receive when we belong to God.  If only we could be this gracious with one another.

The first time I remember reading today’s passage from Philippians, I was in a dorm room with a group of guys for a college Bible study.  We spent a lot of time talking about how Paul used the word skubalon for “poop,” and we thought that was awesome (and hilarious – boys will be boys, after all).  I was in that Bible study for a whole year and got to know those guys pretty well, but later, one of them (we’ll call him Joey, because that was his name) asked my roommate if I was a Christian.  Thankfully, my roommate said something like, “Joey, you were in a Bible study with John for a long time.  You should know.”  I was hurt. I had thought Joey was my friend. Why would he ask such a question? “Am I a Christian?”  It seems that Joey was using a certain set of theological labels – a certain set of religious boxes to check – to ask, not really if I was a Christian, but if I was his kind of Christian, because to Joey, his kind of Christian was the only real kind.

I was upset about this for quite some time, but then I remembered my baptism.  I remembered that I belong to God, that God loves me, and God is pleased with me.  I also remembered that Joey has been baptized, too.  He belongs to God, God loves him, and God is pleased with him.  Our baptism is something we hold in common.  This label that we share is a bridge that spans the theological divide between us.  Maybe someday, Christians like him and Christians like me can find common ground and meet in the middle of that bridge.  

I’ll close with this. . .  It’s not every day that a preacher has the privilege of preaching on the occasion of his or her own child’s baptism.  This might be my one and only shot at this.  I do not know what kind of person Samuel will grow up to be – what sort of labels will be placed upon him by the world or what sort of labels he will place upon himself.  There are good labels and there are bad labels, after all, and I’m sure that Samuel will have his share of both.  My one hope in the midst of all of this is that he will be taught and he will remember the only label that matters – the sign and seal that he belongs to God, that God loves him, and that God is pleased with him.  No other label matters more than that.

Sisters and brothers, remember:  you, too, belong to God, God loves you, and God is pleased with you.  Christ Jesus has made you his own.  No other label matters more. . .

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.  Amen.

------ 

[1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TCBY.

[2] Walter Bauer, A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and Other Early Christian Literature (Chicago:  University of Chicago Press, 1979) 45.

[3] Bauer, 758.

[4] See Acts 7:54 ff.

[5] https://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/626/white-haze?act=2#play.  

[jayne-gatsby]

I was just reflecting a week or so ago on the fact that I tend to pick up the small mannerisms of many of my friends. People from college, people from high school, even new people from work that I've only known for a month or two. And I thought about how whenever something abrupt and unexpected happens- a case snaps shut fast after struggling with it for an inordinate amount of time, a sack of flour explodes in your face, the small ridiculous things of that sort- I pause, and giggle ridiculously, looking up to make eye contact with you even though you're nowhere near. I ran through all the times something would go terribly wrong when baking or playing with the cats (kitty bowling, anyone?) and we'd pause and look at each other before bursting out laughing and I could hear your laugh as clear as day. And now my heart is in fucking pieces knowing I won't get to hear it again. We were supposed to see each other this weekend. Nickie was coming back and we were going to go goof around at the mall and it would mostly be you two catching up and then me in the back just happy to be with friends, happy to feel he warmth that comes with reunions that you actually want to happen. But then she called me on Friday, and I heard her say it the first time and I didn't want it to be true but I made her say it again. And I've repeated the words over and over and over since, and each time it's a different kind of pain or sorrow. The first was a sucker punch, knocking me breathless and leaving me shaky. The second was like a knife, piercing. The third and fourth and fifth and seventy second and two hundred third times, they've all been different and shitty and most unfortunately real. Danielle is dead. One of my first and kindest and goofiest and weirdest and best friends is gone and Jesus I don't get how the world is still turning. I know you didn't dig the whole religion thing. I don't know where I stand on it. But damn, I get why people like the idea of heaven. To think you're creepin' on me, hovering over all of us, silently judging us or throwing some side eye because let's face it I've made another terrible life decision... it helps thinking you're not *really* gone, just somewhere else. (Also I know you'd be laughing at all the weird autocorrects that have popped up while I've been writing this. This is a judgment free zone, Dan.) But if you happen to be creepin'- first request, no scary movie jump-scare shit. You know I didn't sleep for like 3 days after seeing Insidious. Second request is, please please please take some to chill with Nickie. Nobody's ever gonna take your place and I know she really needed and loved the shit out of you and I just know I can't ever fill that role. Third request- come back? Is that too much to ask? I'm not even gonna dwell on why the fuck this happened. Even the priest didn't even try and sell us that "It's all part of God's plan" BS. He knew. Everyone knows, this was a horrible fucking mistake of the universe. And it'll bother me til the day I die, wondering just what happened in the car, wondering if you were scared or hurt in those moments. Wondering if wherever the hell you are now you're okay. I don't want you to think I'm not sad just because I'm planning to work through all of this- I know you understand the whole "need to make money" deal, and I figured you'd get a kick out of the fact that I collect poop now to pay my bills. (It's for science, trust me.) It's just that if I sit still too long I start remembering every little thing and it's just this big ol' wave of feelings (okay, one feeling: sadness) and it feels like nothing's ever going to be okay again. Anyway. To my schmoe, the best schmoe a girl could ever ask for- thank you for everything. Thank you for years of happiness and laughter and also some teenage angst but mostly happiness and laughter. Thank you for your kindness, even if we had weird ways of expressing affection. From now on, whenever I talk to myself in my head, I will forever also ask- what would Dan do?- just to imagine your voice again. Sweet lord, as soon as I wrap my head around the fact that you're gone, I'm going to miss you so goddamn fucking much I don't know what I'm going to do. But for now, here's to waking up in a world where your laughter could exist elsewhere besides my memories. Here's to the plans we'd made for next week, and the year after, and the one after that. Here's to alllllll the shit talking we'd do after our high school reunion, if we even bothered to go. Here's to all the things that might have been, and all the wonderful things that were. I love you, Dan. Keep me company, and try not to judge me too hard when I fuck up my makeup (or my life lol) ❤️

[ourlittledinosaur]

15 Amazing Benefits of Breastfeeding

New Post has been published on http://ourlittledinosaur.azurewebsites.net/15-amazing-benefits-of-breastfeeding/

15 Amazing Benefits of Breastfeeding

Note: In this article, many of the hyperlinks will take you to articles that support my research about breastfeeding. Happy reading!

Making Breastfeeding a Reality

Before the birth of my son, it was always my desire to exclusively breastfeed my baby. It never really occurred to me to do it any other way. As it turns out, the more I read and researched, the more pleased I became about this decision.  If you have read about my breastfeeding journey with my son, you know that in the beginning I wasn’t able to make exclusive breastfeeding a reality. However, before my son was three months old, he was exclusively breastfeeding. Praise the Lord!

And despite the fact that for our family in those first three months, breastfeeding was NOT a cheaper than if we had chosen a formula path, my husband, (who is very frugally minded), was still on board with the decision because of all the amazing benefits breastfeeding had to offer both our child and me as well. So…

Some may ask “Why go through all this trouble just to breastfeed when there are other options for feeding a baby in today’s society?”

Here are 15 Amazing Reasons Why I Breastfeed My Baby:

Benefits for the Baby:

1. Colostrum. The first “milk” a new mother produces is a thick, yellowish, almost clear fluid, called Colostrum. Colostrum is also referred to as “liquid gold”. Why? Colostrum is nutrient-packed and contains everything your baby needs in those first few days of life. Colostrum acts similarly to a vaccine in that it works to ward off infections and viruses that your baby may be exposed to. It also helps to prepare your baby’s tummy for the milk that will come in 3-5 days later.

2. Antibodies and Immune Defense. When a baby breastfeeds, that baby not only receives the antibodies his mother has been exposed to over her lifetime, but, due to the adaptive capability of the milk, also receives antibodies for illnesses that he is exposed to. As soon as a baby has been exposed to something, the act of nursing signals an immune response in the mother that produces the right antibodies the baby needs to ward off the illness. How incredible is that!

3. Superior Nutrition. As a baby grows and changes, so does the mother’s milk based on what the baby needs. The combination of vitamins, protein, and fat makes it a superior nutrition. A baby’s growth spurts, where the baby feeds more often, aid in increasing the mother’s milk supply. Breast milk is also said to contain live organisms, which formula cannot duplicate.

4. Pleasant Poop. Yes, you read that correctly. Exclusively breastfed poop is completely water soluble (which is great for cloth diapering or blowouts) and truly doesn’t have an unpleasant odor. Take it from this Mama who used formula as well, formula poop smells awful! Then there’s the fact that breastfed babies may actually poop less often. Due to the nutrient rich content of breast milk, there’s less “waste” as the baby’s body is better able to absorb it as opposed to formula.

5. Better for Reflux. Continuing on the subject of digestion, breastmilk is easier on a baby’s tummy than formula. Babies stomachs are incredibly immature, and those who breastfeed are less likely to have issues with reflux.

6. Developmental Benefits. There are incredible developmental benefits for a breastfeeding baby as well.

Physical development: the act of suckling actually helps to properly form a baby’s mouth and jaw development, which will aid them later in life when they begin eating and speaking. Bottle fed babies are not required to utilize these muscles the same way.

Mental development: According to WebMD, “Breastfeeding has been linked to higher IQ scores in later childhood in some studies.” I’ll take that as a bonus!

Emotional development: breastfed babies are less likely to deal with anxiety and depression when compared to babies who didn’t breastfeed.

7. Easy On-the-Go! There is considerably less preparation when it comes to feeding a breastfed baby, as opposed to feeding with a bottle. You already have your baby’s food wherever you go, and it’s already in the perfect amount and the perfect temperature. I remember back in the formula days, trying to keep all the bottles washes and ready and measuring out formula and water. I wouldn’t say it’s difficult to do, but definitely takes more prep time when you’re needing to leave the house.

8. Special Bond. I believe all babies bond with their mothers, no matter how they are fed. However, there is something to be said for those special moments of closeness, eye contact, and skin to skin comfort and security the baby feels. Not to mention the hilarious things your baby does while nursing as he gets older.

9. Lower Risks Later in Life. Babies who breastfeed are less likely later in life to develop diabetes or struggle with obesity. “It also lowers their risk of having asthma or allergies.”

Benefits for the Mother:

10. Faster Post Partum Healing. Once a baby is born, the act of breastfeeding helps the uterus contract back to a normal size, which promotes faster post partum healing.

11. Decreased Risk for a Lifetime. Studies show that breastfeeding significantly decreases the risk of breast cancer, ovarian cancer, heart disease, and type 2 diabetes.

12. Two words: No Period! Who didn’t love being pregnant if only for that one reason? Breastfeeding delays ovulation, and thus menstruation as well. Some couples even use it as a natural birth control method, (though few care providers will recommend it as a sole method).

13. Help Losing Weight. Breastfeeding can help in post partum weight loss efforts as it can burn 400-500 calories a day!

14. Decreased Risk of PP Depression. Breastfeeding releases “feel-good” hormones, which can aid in bonding with your baby. Breastfeeding mothers are also 50% less likely to deal with post partum depression than those who do not.

15. Cheap. Although this wasn’t the case for us at first, generally speaking, there is a cost efficiency for the majority families who are able and choose to go the breastfeeding route.

“So how long should I breastfeed my baby?”

We’ll address this question more fully in another post, but there are definite benefits to breastfeeding your child past the first year of his life. The World Health Organization (WHO) actually recommends that a child be fed breast milk for at least the first 2 years. WHO also encourages mothers who may be struggling with breastfeeding to seek out expert support so that they can learn to successfully breastfeed.

So there you have it! 15 AMAZING reasons to breastfeed your baby!

The truth is that God designed mothers to be able to nourish their children, and despite man’s best effort, no supplement can come close to God’s design.

“From the God of your father who helps you, And by the Almighty who blesses you With blessings of heaven above, Blessings of the deep that lies beneath, Blessings of the breasts and of the womb.” Genesis 49:25

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[ourlittledinosaur]

15 Amazing Benefits of Breastfeeding

New Post has been published on http://ourlittledinosaur.com/15-amazing-benefits-of-breastfeeding/

15 Amazing Benefits of Breastfeeding

Note: In this article, many of the hyperlinks will take you to articles that support my research about breastfeeding. Happy reading!

Making Breastfeeding a Reality

Before the birth of my son, it was always my desire to exclusively breastfeed my baby. It never really occurred to me to do it any other way. As it turns out, the more I read and researched, the more pleased I became about this decision.  If you have read about my breastfeeding journey with my son, you know that in the beginning I wasn’t able to make exclusive breastfeeding a reality. However, before my son was three months old, he was exclusively breastfeeding. Praise the Lord!

And despite the fact that for our family in those first three months, breastfeeding was NOT a cheaper than if we had chosen a formula path, my husband, (who is very frugally minded), was still on board with the decision because of all the amazing benefits breastfeeding had to offer both our child and me as well. So…

Some may ask “Why go through all this trouble just to breastfeed when there are other options for feeding a baby in today’s society?”

Here are 15 Amazing Reasons Why I Breastfeed My Baby:

Benefits for the Baby:

1. Colostrum. The first “milk” a new mother produces is a thick, yellowish, almost clear fluid, called Colostrum. Colostrum is also referred to as “liquid gold”. Why? Colostrum is nutrient-packed and contains everything your baby needs in those first few days of life. Colostrum acts similarly to a vaccine in that it works to ward off infections and viruses that your baby may be exposed to. It also helps to prepare your baby’s tummy for the milk that will come in 3-5 days later.

2. Antibodies and Immune Defense. When a baby breastfeeds, that baby not only receives the antibodies his mother has been exposed to over her lifetime, but, due to the adaptive capability of the milk, also receives antibodies for illnesses that he is exposed to. As soon as a baby has been exposed to something, the act of nursing signals an immune response in the mother that produces the right antibodies the baby needs to ward off the illness. How incredible is that!

3. Superior Nutrition. As a baby grows and changes, so does the mother’s milk based on what the baby needs. The combination of vitamins, protein, and fat makes it a superior nutrition. A baby’s growth spurts, where the baby feeds more often, aid in increasing the mother’s milk supply. Breast milk is also said to contain live organisms, which formula cannot duplicate.

4. Pleasant Poop. Yes, you read that correctly. Exclusively breastfed poop is completely water soluble (which is great for cloth diapering or blowouts) and truly doesn’t have an unpleasant odor. Take it from this Mama who used formula as well, formula poop smells awful! Then there’s the fact that breastfed babies may actually poop less often. Due to the nutrient rich content of breast milk, there’s less “waste” as the baby’s body is better able to absorb it as opposed to formula.

5. Better for Reflux. Continuing on the subject of digestion, breastmilk is easier on a baby’s tummy than formula. Babies stomachs are incredibly immature, and those who breastfeed are less likely to have issues with reflux.

6. Developmental Benefits. There are incredible developmental benefits for a breastfeeding baby as well.

Physical development: the act of suckling actually helps to properly form a baby’s mouth and jaw development, which will aid them later in life when they begin eating and speaking. Bottle fed babies are not required to utilize these muscles the same way.

Mental development: According to WebMD, “Breastfeeding has been linked to higher IQ scores in later childhood in some studies.” I’ll take that as a bonus!

Emotional development: breastfed babies are less likely to deal with anxiety and depression when compared to babies who didn’t breastfeed.

7. Easy On-the-Go! There is considerably less preparation when it comes to feeding a breastfed baby, as opposed to feeding with a bottle. You already have your baby’s food wherever you go, and it’s already in the perfect amount and the perfect temperature. I remember back in the formula days, trying to keep all the bottles washes and ready and measuring out formula and water. I wouldn’t say it’s difficult to do, but definitely takes more prep time when you’re needing to leave the house.

8. Special Bond. I believe all babies bond with their mothers, no matter how they are fed. However, there is something to be said for those special moments of closeness, eye contact, and skin to skin comfort and security the baby feels. Not to mention the hilarious things your baby does while nursing as he gets older.

9. Lower Risks Later in Life. Babies who breastfeed are less likely later in life to develop diabetes or struggle with obesity. “It also lowers their risk of having asthma or allergies.”

Benefits for the Mother:

10. Faster Post Partum Healing. Once a baby is born, the act of breastfeeding helps the uterus contract back to a normal size, which promotes faster post partum healing.

11. Decreased Risk for a Lifetime. Studies show that breastfeeding significantly decreases the risk of breast cancer, ovarian cancer, heart disease, and type 2 diabetes.

12. Two words: No Period! Who didn’t love being pregnant if only for that one reason? Breastfeeding delays ovulation, and thus menstruation as well. Some couples even use it as a natural birth control method, (though few care providers will recommend it as a sole method).

13. Help Losing Weight. Breastfeeding can help in post partum weight loss efforts as it can burn 400-500 calories a day!

14. Decreased Risk of PP Depression. Breastfeeding releases “feel-good” hormones, which can aid in bonding with your baby. Breastfeeding mothers are also 50% less likely to deal with post partum depression than those who do not.

15. Cheap. Although this wasn’t the case for us at first, generally speaking, there is a cost efficiency for the majority families who are able and choose to go the breastfeeding route.

“So how long should I breastfeed my baby?”

We’ll address this question more fully in another post, but there are definite benefits to breastfeeding your child past the first year of his life. The World Health Organization (WHO) actually recommends that a child be fed breast milk for at least the first 2 years. WHO also encourages mothers who may be struggling with breastfeeding to seek out expert support so that they can learn to successfully breastfeed.

So there you have it! 15 AMAZING reasons to breastfeed your baby!

The truth is that God designed mothers to be able to nourish their children, and despite man’s best effort, no supplement can come close to God’s design.

“From the God of your father who helps you, And by the Almighty who blesses you With blessings of heaven above, Blessings of the deep that lies beneath, Blessings of the breasts and of the womb.” Genesis 49:25

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