#looking ahead at tomorrow’s schedule. ack

[muirneach]

felix vs giron first round is so evil because felix should win it but knowing him he could just as easily flop and die here

[tenyacore]

sweet summer days

-> husband!iida tenya x gn!reader

read before continuing!!: although reader is labeled as gender neutral, the kids sharing both your features and tenya’s implies female anatomy or the ability to bear a child. this can be twisted to be gender neutral friendly though, like a relative of yours being a surrogate. you have tohru (7), toshiro (6), and tomoe (5).

ack this isnt as good as i wanted it to be ㅠㅅㅠ it just sounded so much better in my head aaaaa. i just wanted sweet n soft cuteness. i also fell in love with the children omg i want. kids. now ...

warnings: none.

word count: 1.4k words

check out my masterlist for more of my works!!

laughter and the sound of tiny feet running across the hardwood floor filled your spacious home. what was meant to be a lazy day off for your husband has turned into a chaotic day of cheeky grins, sticky fingers, and rough splashes of pool water. your husband tenya, however, couldn’t be any more happier than he is right now.

the clinking of ice cubes against glass and the mattress dipping underneath you gently woke you up. you look up to see tenya opening a new book he bought recently, quickly becoming submerged in it’s contents. groaning ever so softly, you contemplated whether you should wake up or stay in your comfortable position. unfortunately you didn’t have much of a chance to decide, as your youngest, tomoe, woke you up with a soft grunt, kicking her feet in the air as she desperately tried making her way up onto your bed.

“tomoe? what are you doing up so early?” your husband asks, reaching over you to pick up the girl with ease. tomoe was the sleepiest of your three children; she was shy, silent, and soft in nature, much different than her two older siblings. it was rare to see her this active in the mornings, much less awake, as she had a tendency to nap whenever she saw the chance to.

“tohru and toshiro are fighting again” she whines, a lazy hand reaching up to rub her eye as you sit up, patting down the stray hairs sticking up from her head. she had shoulder length blue hair, with your eyes and smile, along with tenya’s quirk. he swore up and down that he’d train her the best he could so she could continue his legacy. while he promised he had no favorites, you could tell tenya was excited to have tomoe as his successor.

“ahh,” tenya shakes his head “those two tend to bicker quite a lot. did they wake you?” your daughter only responded with a soft nod, already falling back asleep, soothed by her father’s embrace and your gentle hand stroking her head. “i guess i’ll have to scold them a bit for making a commotion, then” tomoe let out a soft ‘mhm’ in agreement, her head finally resting against tenya’s chest as he stood whilst carrying her in his arms.

ever since graduating, becoming an adult, and starting a family with you, tenya’s become a much calmer man. it was a bit hard at first, but after learning from you and tohru that his stiffness and sudden movements aren’t exactly the most relaxing, he tried to become more loose. despite this, he’s still the awkward, nerdy, and strict boy you fell in love with at heart.

“you’re so mean tohru!” your son toshiro’s voice could be heard loudly as soon as you opened the door of your room. your two other kids were in the living room, minecraft sounds playing loudly over their argument.

“i'm not being mean, i'm being fair toshiro! papa made times for us to be on the game so we wouldn’t get into fights!” you sighed, thinking to yourself ‘so much for that schedule tenya put all that effort into’. “you shouldn’t have started a game when you knew your time was almost up!” tohru continued to holler at toshiro, who looked like he was about to cry.

tohru took mostly after tenya, his strict way of being mixing with your louder, more carefree side. she was a stickler for rules but enjoyed picking on her brother and had a tendency to be loud and over-the-top. she had your hair color but tenya’s sharp eyes. she had long hair and lighter skin than the other two from staying inside and reading more than being outside.

“tohru, sometimes, we can just choose to be nice. when you’re nice, most of the time your kindness will be returned. either way, seeing your kindness make someone happy will always be the best part of being nice. if you see that your brother is having a fun time, why don't you let him keep playing?” you take your eldest into your arms, pulling her close to you as you sat down. you weren’t afraid to talk to her about more complex/harder to grasp topics as she was extremely intelligent like her father.

“i guess you’re right…” she hung her head and sighed.

“yeah, tohru!” toshiro angrily huffed, chopping her head tenya style. tomoe continued to sleep as her siblings ran after each other around the house, chaos ensuing wherever they went.

“dad!” toshiro climbed tenya’s back and flashed you a toothy smile. toshiro was the most hyper out of the three, but also a complete cry baby. he was a proud older brother to tomoe yet relied on tohru to protect him, and was an all around happy, cute kid. he had short messy hair that was the same color as yours, with a single streak of blue. he was generally the most balanced combination of you and tenya and had much darker skin than the others, constantly playing around in the sun with todoroki’s kid.

he continued to poke his fathers cheek as he spoke “can we get in the pool today? can we? can we?” he repeated, only stopping and climbing down when your husband caved and said yes to toshi’s whining. “dad! (mom/dad/parent)! you should come in too!” was the last thing the little boy said before disappearing to quickly change and get his towel, which tohru did as well.

“what do you say? wanna go into the pool?” you asked tenya, getting up to change before toshi started whining again. tenya shook his head softly.

“i'm going to cut up some watermelon for the kids and then sit by the pool. i’d rather read for today.” he contentedly sighs as he moves toward the kitchen island, pulling out a watermelon from god knows where and starting to cut it. allowing him to enjoy his day however he’d like to, you went on ahead without him.

“how are you not burning up, ten?” you asked once he joined you all outside, just the mere sight of him in the blazing sun making you sweat. he just smiled and shrugged, continuing his book with the sounds of his children playing together in the background. you held tomoe cautiously as she half heartedly splashed the other kids. honestly, how she came out with a personality more like todoroki’s is beyond both you and tenya, though todoroki jokes that tomoe is really just his child that you guys stole from him.

the first to leave the pool was tohru, then curious toshi, and then you after tomoe whined that she wanted to go with the other two. they all went back inside, towels covering them before pouncing on the plate of watermelon like it was the last in the world. luckily tenya preplanned and saved a couple small slices for the two of you, otherwise you would’ve missed out.

laying next to your husband on the beach chair, he let out a soft groan when your cold, wet hair and hands met his warm skin. “did you not bring out a towel? you’re really cold, love.” you let out a whine which tenya knew meant ‘no and i regret not bringing one’. he adjusted himself to put his arm around you, in attempts to warm you up.

it wasn't long before the sound of children running came close, tohru chasing toshiro angrily and tomoe slowly trailing behind them. you chuckled as tomoe climbed onto you and tenya, a watermelon seed stuck to her cheek and another in her hair. as you removed the seeds, tohru and toshiro kept running after one another.

“toshiro you took the last piece of watermelon so don’t cry when you get what you deserve!” she shrieked, and you decided you probably should no longer let her go over to bakugo’s house, because as much as his youngest boy liked to read with tohru, the rest of his kids took after him, which was probably where she learned her more aggressive behaviors.

holding tomoe in your arms, your children became background noise that lulled you to sleep. the last words you heard were “papa can we go to sanrio puroland tomorrow!?” from tohru. with tenya being puddy at the hands of his children, it was safe to say the summer fun wasn’t done just yet.

[gabriel-agreste-has-no-rights]

Rating: G

Summary: When Marinette has to cook for her family reunion, Adrien offers to help. Only one problem: he has no idea how to cook. With Plagg's help, Adrien proposes a Disney-inspired solution that will either keep him from making a fool of himself, or backfire terribly. (Spoiler alert: it backfires terribly.) A university-aged Adrinette reveal fic.

Word Count: 6437

XXX

“Plagg, what am I going to do?  I don’t know how to cook!”  Adrien pulled at his hair as he paced circles around his apartment.

Plagg, meanwhile, lazily hovered with his paws crossed behind his head.  “Maybe you should’ve thought about that before you tried to swoop in like some kind of superhero.”

“I am a superhero.”  Not that it mattered, because his superpower was destruction. Maybe his Lady would’ve been able to help Marinette cook dinner for her family reunion, but Adrien was … well.  Even though the cat miraculous didn’t actually make him more disaster prone, he had enough bad luck in the kitchen on his own.  He’d survived on spaghetti and takeout since moving into his own apartment this semester.

“Why don’t you just tell her you can’t do it?  Something came up.  You fell headfirst into a pool of cream cheese.  You got zapped by an akuma and all your hair fell out.”

“That hasn’t happened in at least a month.  Besides, I can’t flake out on Marinette.  She needs me.”  He stood up straighter.

“What she needs is someone who won’t turn soup into an explosive.  What about your friend Alya?  Isn’t her mom some kind of chef?”

“She’s out of town for Christmas.  Nino too, or I’d ask him to help me.”  Did he know anyone else who could teach him how to cook in one night?  Kagami was back in Japan, Chloe wouldn’t touch an oven to save her life, Luka was on tour with XY… Ladybug was pretty much his only friend still in town.  She would probably be willing to teach him, but on their last patrol she’d mentioned she’d be busy the next few days with her own plans.

“You need to get some more friends, kid.”

“It’s kind of late for that,” Adrien murmured.  Too many people in his classes were more interested in the Gabriel name than in him.  Besides, he might not have made a lot of new friends, but he’d gotten much closer to Marinette and his old friends now that he had more control over his schedule.  

“Well, as your very first and best friend—”

“Chloe was technically my first friend.”

Plagg glared.  “As your first and best friend, I will help you for the low low price of two wheels of Camembert.”

Adrien stopped pacing.  He only realized he’d ended up in the bathroom when he caught a glimpse of his reflection.

“Wait.  You know how to cook?”

Plagg scoffed.  “I’ve been alive since the dawn of time.  I’ve picked up a thing or two.”

Adrien raised an eyebrow.  “You also thought that my blender was a jet tub for kwamis.”

“Okay, so you humans have invented some fancy new gadgets since I was last out, big deal.  I still know more about cooking than you.”

Unfortunately, he was probably right.

“Alright.  Deal.”  Adrien held out a finger, and he and Plagg shook on it.

“Alright, loverboy, let’s get cooking.”

XXX

“No, not like that!  What are you trying to do, knock someone out with that thing?”

“At least I wouldn’t do it with the smell!”  Adrien instinctively waved the frying pan in front of his nose, and the burned remnants of roux glopped out onto the tile.

“Coward.  It’ll taste good once you put it all together.”

Adrien wasn’t convinced.  But then again, he hadn’t followed Plagg’s instructions exactly.  Plagg never gave him quite enough time to pour the ingredients in the pan or measure the spices with the little spoons.  

“I wish you’d be able to help me while I’m there.”  Adrien sighed.  “I’m going to forget all of this as soon as I leave.”

“You can’t be good at everything, I guess.”  Plagg shrugged.  “You can still always call your girlfriend and say you gave up.”

“She’s a good friend.  We’ve been over this.”  He’d promised not to call Marinette ‘just a friend’ on the grounds that she deserved better than that.  But she still wasn’t his girlfriend.  Which was fine, so why did his stomach sink slightly?  Probably just nervousness about the task ahead of him.  

“And I’m not giving up.  What if you just … hid in my hair and whispered advice?”

Plagg tapped his chin.  “Maybe if you wear a hat …” A grin suddenly split his tiny face.  “Hey, what if you wore that ug—uh, that beret Ladybug gave you?  You know, from your fan club?”

“Great idea!”  Adrien bolted out of the bathroom and towards his closet.  He wore the hat every once in a while—its ridiculous energy was too good to leave hidden like it had been in lycée.  He made a special point of wearing it to every meeting with his dad, though he did feel a little bit nervous of wearing it around Marinette.  She was in their university’s design program; she’d probably think it was tacky.

Oh well.  He’d probably been tackier around her before.

“You sure you’ll fit in here?”  Adrien squinted at the underside of the beret before pulling it over his hair.

“Looks cozy enough to me.”  Plagg slipped under, and Adrien felt him shuffle around. Unfortunately, his voice was too muffled for Adrien to make out after that.

“Plagg?”

“Blegh.”  The kwami scrambled back out and scraped his tongue with his paws.  “Your hair tastes like shampoo.  I can’t talk without getting a mouthful of it.”

“Guess that isn’t going to work …” He pursed his lips as he adjusted the beret.  “It’s too bad real life isn’t like Ratatouille. You could just tug on my hair and do all the cooking for me.”

Unless …?

“Oh no, don’t give me that look.”  Plagg crossed his arms.  “That’s just a movie.  Though it would be nice to show you what it feels like to get dragged around for a change …”

“It’s worth a shot, isn’t it?”  Adrien didn’t really think it would work either, but Plagg was magic.  

“Fine.  But I’m upping my price to three wheels.”

Plagg slipped back under the beret, and Adrien felt a tugging sensation on his scalp.  But nothing seemed to happen.

“Guess that was a pretty dumb idea,” he admitted sheepishly.

Then green light crackled from his ring.  

His arms flung into the air.

“Ack!  Plagg, did you do that?”  

Adrien heard a muffled cackle from under the hat.  Then his legs started walking towards the refrigerator.

“Okay, so this is … working?  This is working!”

Plagg missed a few times before guiding his hand to pull open the fridge.  Of course, his next step was to reach for a wedge of Camembert and hold it up to his head.

“The sweet taste of victory,” Plagg said while popping out to swallow the wedge whole.

“More like the rotten taste of old cheese.”

But Adrien still grinned.  However Plagg had pulled off his puppeteer trick, Adrien wasn’t going to make a fool of himself tomorrow.

XXX

“Adrien!”  Marinette threw her arms around him as soon as she opened the door.  “Thank goodness you’re here. My parents just called and they got a last-minute order and—eep!”  She sprung back, her eyes wide as she stared at his beret.

“Come on, it’s not that bad.”  He rubbed the back of his neck, trying not to feel embarrassed.  Marinette wouldn’t judge him based on what he wore.  “It was an old gift.  I like that it drives my father crazy.”

Plus, Ladybug had hand-delivered it, but she probably didn’t care about that.

“W-well then, it’s perfect.”  She grinned too wide.  “I just don’t think I’ve ever seen you in a hat before.”

“You’ve definitely—”

“Anyway, no time for that!  There’s only five hours before Uncle Wang gets here. Nonna is already at my parent’s, and my other grandma and grandpa are coming for the first time since Mom moved here.  Not to mention fourteen of my cousins I’ve never met and their parents!”  Marinette rushed towards the small kitchen, which was already full of steaming pots and used pans. She threw on her pink oven mitts and pulled a tray of golden-brown pastries out of the oven.

Adrien swallowed.  Marinette’s kitchen might look like a war zone, but she clearly knew what she was doing.  What if he just got in the way?

“How did you end up in charge of the food?”  he asked while throwing on a mint-green apron from inside the pantry door.  Her great-uncle was a world-class chef, and her parents owned a bakery.  Her grandpa Rolland had even taught mice how to bake.  

“I’m not in charge.  I just need to help a little since Uncle Wang is running late, and the reunion starts tonight, and Grandpa won’t bake anything in bulk because ‘that’s not how it’s done’’—she used a gruff imitation of his voice—“and my parents have so much bakery work to do. I’m just trying to do what I can.”

She sighed as she stirred a pot of wonton soup.  “Unfortunately, I can’t do a lot.”

“What are you talking about?  It looks like you could feed an army with all this.”  

He carefully dodged Marinette as she scrambled in a drawer for a fork.  She tested the rice noodles boiling behind the soup, then grimaced and slumped against the counter, fork nearly slipping from her fingers. Her hair was falling out of her bun, and flour smudged her pink apron, contrasting with the splatters of dark sauce.

“I hope so.  There’s just … so much to live up to, you know?  Everyone on both sides of my family cooks.  And now I have to merge styles from two different cultures in a way that will please everyone …”

Her gaze swept across the counter, where dumplings and quiches, brothy soups and thin crêpes—even ratatouille, ironically—lay in various stages of completion. The savory and sweet fragrances somehow melded together in harmony.

“I know I can’t understand how hard that must be. About trying to bridge two different sides of your family, I mean.  But you’re amazing, Marinette.” He stepped closer to her and brushed a streak of flour off of her cheek. “You’ve already worked so hard on all this; I can’t see how anyone wouldn’t love it.  May I?”

He gestured to a spoon sitting in one of the soups, and she nodded.  He raised it to his lips and sipped the tangy broth.  A bit of crunchy bamboo shoot added texture to the savory liquid.  He didn’t want to eat too much—it was for her family, not him—but if it weren’t for that, he could’ve downed the whole bowl.  He could practically taste the love and care she’d put into it.

“See? Amazing.”  He grinned.  “Just like the rest of the food we’re going to make.”

At least, the food she made would be amazing.  He just hoped that what he made with Plagg’s help would be edible.  And not offend her family.

Her lips parted before curving into a smile.  “Right.  Thank you, Adrien.”

She paused, staring for a moment, until one of the shallow pots started bubbling over.

“Ack!  The filling!”

She rushed to switch off the burner and remove the lid before sighing loudly.  “I think it’s still alright.  Now I just need to fold this into the dough …”

“Can I help with that?”  he asked, feeling like a rock in the middle of a river as Marinette flowed between the cooking stations around him.

“Huh?  Oh—um, why don’t you work on filling the crêpes instead?  This baozi is a Chinese dish, and it’s my first time making it by myself.  Not that I don’t appreciate the offer!  You were so sweet to come at all, and—”

“Marinette.”  He squeezed her shoulder gently, wishing he could relieve some ot the tension there.  “I’ll do the crêpes.” 

She let out a breath.  “Thanks.  I was going to do a pear-hazelnut filling, if you’re okay with that?  The pears are in the bottom right drawer of the fridge, and the hazelnuts are on the middle shelf in the panty.  All the spices are up there.”  She pointed to the cabinet above the sink.

“Sounds perfect,” he said with the fake confidence he usually saved for his modeling jobs.

Before he could ask for a recipe, she went back to work, leaving him to his own devices in front of a stack of unfilled crêpes.  A mixture of the rich smells and his own nerves started to turn his stomach.

“Are you ready, Plagg?”  he whispered, adjusting his beret.

In response, his scalp twinged, and then his hand rose and formed a thumbs-up.

“Well, here we go.”  He cracked his knuckles.  

He rinsed out a pan that it looked like Marinette had previously used for some kind of stir fry.  That wouldn’t be a problem, would it?  It looked like every other pan in the apartment was in use already.  

Marinette didn’t stop to correct him.  Then again, she seemed to be in ten places at once, adding spices and stirring and adjusting dials and rummaging through cupboards, all in between filling her baozi.  Watching her work was so mesmerizing it was almost too easy to ignore his own job.

Until Plagg started tugging his hair again, anyway.

This is going to be weird, he thought while Plagg directed his hands to chop the pears.  He was pretty sure he could’ve done that himself—he didn’t want his kwami chopping off one of his fingers.  But resisting at this point would just increase his chances of accidentally getting stabbed.

Besides, Plagg was fast. He diced the five pears in the time it probably would’ve taken Adrien to cut up one.  Granted, he also left a juicy mess on the counter, but it sounded like they were on too much of a deadline to worry about that.

Plagg tossed them into the pan, cores and all.  Adrien frowned at that.

“I hope you know what you’re doing,” he muttered.

“What?”  Marinette asked from where she was stretching out dough.

“Um, nothing!  I just, uh, talk to myself while I cook.”

“Oh, me too.  I was just trying not to do it in front of you.  You know, in case I sounded crazy.”  She laughed, seeming to release a little bit of tension. “I think I picked it up from my mom.  She always says the steps out loud as she does them so she doesn’t forget which one she’s on.”

He smiled at the image of her doing this with Mrs. Cheng.  “Did you cook with your mom a lot?”

“I don’t think I’d say a lot.  I was pretty busy in lycée, and I didn’t appreciate her culture as much as I do now.  I wish I would’ve learned more.”

“It looks like you learned a lot if you can put all this together.”

She brushed a strand of hair behind her ear.  “Thanks.  That means a lot.”

He retrieved the hazelnuts and tossed them into the pan.  She still had her back to him, the baozi taking up most of her attention.  Should he ask her to check his work so far?  Plagg didn’t hesitate to nab some spices from the high cabinet and start sprinkling them into the pan.

“Wait—not that one!” he hissed, trying to drop the shaker that read chili powder before Plagg could add it.

“Adrien?  Is something wrong?”

He spun, quickly shoving the container behind his back.  “No!  Everything’s just peachy—er, pear-y.”

She giggled at his joke, even though it had to be one of his lamest puns yet.

“Okay, but you can let me know if you need help.  Sorry I just kind of threw you into this.”  Her arm gently brushed his as she dialed back the heat on the noodles.  “Um—is there a reason you’re holding chili powder?” 

“I was just moving it so I could reach the, uh…”

Plagg helpfully directed his arm towards a different spice.

“... garlic salt?”

Marinette blinked, and he hastily shoved the garlic salt back, selecting cinnamon instead.  He should’ve known that trusting the kwami who liked eating rotten cheese would be a mistake.

“You’re so funny, Adrien.”  She laughed again.  “But, um, you might want to double check your pears.  I think some of those still have the cores in them.”

His face flushed.  Thanks a lot, Plagg.

He picked out the cores with a pair of tongs, hoping that his kwami wouldn’t try to take over again.  Adrien might be bad at cooking, but at least he wasn’t going to try and poison Marinette’s family.

Unfortunately, he didn’t have much idea of what to do next.  He’d turned the burner on high, and the pears were starting to sizzle.  How did nuts cook?  That didn’t make a lot of sense to him.  He probably needed something liquidy to go with them, right?

Aaaand the pears already smelled like they were burning.  He quickly flipped back the knob while he searched for something to turn into a sauce.  Milk?  That would make it nice and creamy, right?

He grabbed the half-gallon from the fridge and splashed a bit into the pan.  Drops splattered the counter, and he winced.

That was when Plagg again decided to take over.  Adrien grit his teeth as he selected the block of muenster from the cheese drawer.  That definitely didn’t belong in the crêpe filling, but Adrien couldn’t get him to stop without making a scene in front of Marinette.  Who would then wonder why he was yelling at himself, and either think he was insane or find out his secret identity.  Both of which would be unacceptable.

He growled, hoping Plagg would get the message.  If he did, he didn’t show it.  At least Marinette didn’t hear over her own soft humming.

The sliced cheese went into the pan, plopping wetly in the milk.  Maybe the finished product would surprise him, and cheese and pears would create a tasty sweet-savory combo, and Marinette would be super impressed by his originality, and she’d invite him over to cook with him again, and they’d make a cute romantic dinner together …

He banished that daydream before he could think too much of it.

By that point Plagg was using his arm to whisk the milk and melting cheese together.  The pears and hazelnuts had settled to the bottom of the pan.  He frowned as the whisk failed to unstick them.

“This isn’t working,” he said under his breath.  “We might need to start over.”

He swore he could hear Plagg’s irritated sigh.  But the kwami jerked the pan up, taking it towards the sink.

“Hey, what are you—Plagg!”  he shouted before he could stop himself.

Plagg dropped the pan in the sink, spraying hot milk-cheese-pear slime all over the backsplash.  And all over Adrien’s apron.  

And, most importantly, all over his face.

“Adrien!”  Marinette dropped her unfinished dumpling back on the counter.  Filling spilled out as she rushed to his side.  “Are you okay?  What happened?”

He hurriedly tried to splash cold water on his face, but spilled it more down his shirt than anything.  She offered him a damp hand towel, which was much more helpful.

“I’m so sorry.”  His face still burned, but not from the hot food.

“It’s okay!  Accidents happen—trust me, I would know.”  She smiled before her eyes widened.  “Oh no, your beret!”

“What?”  He slapped his hands to his head, prompting a tiny yelp from Plagg.  So he was still there.  Under his hat.  Which was still on his head. Phew.

“It’s got milk on it.” Marinette reached up like she intended to take it off.

“No!”  he shouted, and she stepped back, startled.

“S-sorry!  I just thought I’d help you clean it off, since it seems so, um, important to you.”

“I like it with the milk on it.  It adds, uh, character?”

He heard Plagg snicker from beneath the beret.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”  she asked.  “If you need to take a break, or, um, get a new shirt … n-not that I want you to take off your shirt!  Uh—forget I said that.”

She shook her head, and more strands fell out of her bun.

He frowned down at his shirt.  Unfortunately, the splatter had made it under his apron, and his shirt was pretty gross.  He even felt a slimy pear sliding down under his collar.

“I’m okay,” he said.  “Finishing all the food for your reunion is more important.”

“No, don’t worry.  I can handle it.  Just having you here to keep me from freaking out has helped more than you know.”

She took the towel back from him with a smile.  Frankly, he was still surprised she wasn’t angry with him.  He’d come to help, and all he’d done so far was waste her time.

“I’m really not bothering you?”  he asked, rubbing the back of his neck.  Bad idea.  His hands were still a bit wet and sticky.

“You could never bother me, Adrien.”  Her cheeks pinked before she turned back to fiddle with the soup.  

“Really?  I thought …”  He bit his lip, remembering how many times he’d startled Marinette before.  How many times he’d seemed to make her uncomfortable, or awkward, or … he wasn’t really sure what.  There had always been something keeping them apart, no matter how close they became.

Maybe it’s just your little crush, Plagg would’ve teased.  Thankfully, he wasn’t going to talk while trapped under the beret.

“Thought what?”  she asked once she’d added some seasonings to the soup.  

“I thought I’d be your last pick for cooking help,” he said, which wasn’t quite a lie.  “I didn’t want to tell you, but I … well, I don’t really know what I’m doing.”

Best to just admit it now, rather than after he’d ruined her family reunion.  

Marinette blinked before covering her mouth.  “I’m so sorry.  I should’ve known you probably never cooked at your house.  And here I am just asking you to throw together a crêpe filling!”

“It’s okay!  I’m the one who’s sorry.  I should’ve told you, I just … I wanted to impress you.”

Maybe he shouldn’t have admitted that much.  He was sure he heard Plagg laughing from under his hat.

“You … wanted to impress … me?”  She pointed to herself, as if there was anyone else in the kitchen he might have been talking about.

“Is that really so surprising?”

“Uh—yeah, actually.” Marinette stared at him like he’d grown a second head.  Plagg hadn’t peeked out, had he?  “I might be able to cook, but you’re good at everything.  Fencing, basketball, Mandarin—which took me ages to get halfway decent at—not to mention you’re drop-dead gorgeous—”

His heart stopped.  Her eyes nearly bulged out of her head.  

“I mean—you’re a model; of course you’re gorgeous!  It’s literally your job.  I bet people call you gorgeous all the time.” 

“Not when I’m covered in slimy food, though.”  He grinned.  She thought he was drop-dead gorgeous!  Maybe he hadn’t made too much of a mess after all.

“Well—you would be a lot more gorgeous if you took off that stupid beret!”  She pointed at his head.

“W-what?”  He pulled it down over his ears.  “This is my emotional support beret.  I can’t take it off or I’ll cry.”

“Why did you have to pick that one, though?  It’s so—I don’t know!” She gestured vaguely.  “It looks like a fourteen-year-old made it!”

He pouted at her.  “Hey, be nice.  It was probably fashionable in Brazil at the time.”

It did look pretty silly, but that was its appeal.  Fashion-savvy Marinette probably wouldn’t understand that.

“R-right.  In Brazil.”  She shook her head.  “Why do you like it though?”

He blushed.  Aside from spitting in the face of the Gabriel brand, it also reminded him of the day Ladybug had appeared in his room.  That serendipitous event had never happened before or since.

“How embarrassing does it sound if I say my old crush delivered it to me?”

“Your—your crush?”  She blinked.  “But then—you had a crush on Ladybug?”

The soup started bubbling again, but she made no move to quiet it.

“Of course I have a crush on Ladybug.  I’m pretty sure all of Paris has a crush on—wait, how did you know Ladybug was the one to deliver it?”

Marinette’s face went pale.  “I—um, well, I … I think the soup is burning!”

She rushed to stir it again, but Adrien caught her hand.

“Wait, Marinette, please.”  His heart beat faster.  He’d never told anyone about Ladybug’s visit.  She hadn’t been surprised when he mentioned Brazil, either.

But what could he say?  Come out and ask her if she was Ladybug?  That would be too good to be true, right?  Marinette couldn’t be Ladybug; he’d seen them together once.  But he’d pulled crazy stunts to protect his identity too.

She bit her lip, but didn’t pull her hand from his.  

“I can’t answer that question, Adrien.”

It wasn’t a confirmation.  But it wasn’t a denial either.

It had been five years.  Five years, and he still didn’t know who his partner was.  If she was here, in front of him, after all this time …

… he’d still respect her choice not to tell him.  As much as it hurt, he’d do it.

“Alright.”  He sighed.  “I get it.”

An uncomfortable silence pushed between them, punctured only by the bubbling soup and beeping oven.  The first batch of Marinette’s baozi was done; she removed them without speaking.

Why couldn’t they go back to five minutes ago, when she’d called him gorgeous?  He was already thrilled to hear Marinette say that.  But if she was his Lady too?  He’d melt just like that cheese in the pan.

It was going to drive him crazy if he thought about it too long.  He turned on the faucet, hoping that the loud water would drown out his thoughts as he did the dishes.  At least that was one task he could accomplish without ruining any more of Marinette’s food.

“I’m sorry,” she murmured, barely audible over the running tap.

“What for?”  He was the one pushing the boundaries between them.  If she was even Ladybug at all.  Maybe he’d managed to misinterpret everything, but he couldn’t see how.

“For not being honest with you.  I wish I could, I swear.”  Her hands squeezed her dough, and it oozed out between her fingers.

“I’m sure you have your reasons,” he said with resignation.  Ladybug was the Guardian.  She couldn’t risk revealing her identity.  Even if it felt unfair, he should be used to it by now.

But before, you didn’t think Ladybug was one of your best friends.

Even more than that, if he was honest with himself.  He’d wanted to be closer to Marinette for a  long time now.  What if he was just deluding himself with wishful thinking?

“I wish I didn’t, sometimes,” she murmured.

He switched off the faucet and turned to face her.  Maybe some things needed to stay secret, but not everything.

“Marinette?”  He swallowed.

She looked up from where she’d been absently rolling the dough again.  So much for not wasting her time.

“Y-yeah?”

He didn’t expect to confess to her while standing in her kitchen, with Plagg hiding under his old beret, with his clothes covered in the ruined crêpe filling.  But it was important, and if he could finally admit it to himself, the least he could do was admit it to her.

“I don’t just have a crush on Ladybug.”

“You—you don’t?”  

Was it just his imagination, or did she deflate a little?

“She’s still very important to me.  I know she always will be.  But I’ve come to realize how important you are to me, too.”  He watched her face as he spoke, but her wide eyes were impossible to read.  Hopefully he wasn’t ruining everything with what he was about to say.

“I like you, Marinette.  As more than a friend.  And I would never want to make you uncomfortable.  All I’ve ever wanted is to be closer to you.”

For a moment, her face didn’t change.  She just stood there, staring blankly, like someone had pressed a pause button.  He would’ve thought Bunnyx had stopped time to reset his screw-up if it weren’t for the soup continuing to boil over.

“Marinette?”  he prodded, his stomach beginning to bubble as nervously as that soup.  

She jumped.  “Yes, I—comfort you me make—yike lou—”

A stream of incoherent noises followed that.  Oh no, he’d broken her!  Why couldn’t Plagg have taken over and stopped him from talking?  

“—ugh!  I thought I dopped stewing this years ago!”  She dropped her burning face into her hands.

Adrien reached out to touch her shoulder and then thought better of it.  His arm fell limply to his side.

“I’m so sorry.  You can just forget I said anything.  I’ll—I’ll let you finish up the food and get out of your way—”

“No!”  She waved her hands, startling him so bad he stepped back—and slipped in a puddle of spilled dishwater.

“Adrien!”  She caught the front of his apron as he fell, but that just meant she was pulled down on top of him.

He yelped as his head cracked against the linoleum.  At least she landed on his chest, his arms cradling her.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry—AAAAAH!”

“What, what!?”  He sat up as she scrambled off of him.

That was when he caught sight of the striped beret lying in the puddle next to him.

Oh no.

Plagg laughed nervously from where he was tangled in Adrien’s hair.  “Hey, Pigtails.”

“Chat?”  Marinette smacked her hands to her cheeks.  “You’re—you’re Chat Noir?” 

“Surprise!”  Plagg wasn’t in Adrien’s line of sight, but he could hear the grin in his kwami’s voice.

“Where’s Bunnyx when you need her?”  Adrien groaned.  Not only was his confession a total bust, but he also ended up giving away his most important secret.

And he still didn’t know for sure that she was Ladybug.

“You’re Chat Noir.”  Marinette plopped down into the puddle beside him.  “Adrien is Chat Noir.”

“Yeah, yeah, we got that,” Plagg said.  “Are you gonna put the poor kid out of his misery or not?”

“Huh?”  She blinked.

“He’s in love with you.  Hopelessly, stupidly in love with you.  He loves you almost as much as I love cheese.”

That was a pretty big point in favor of Marinette being Ladybug. He guessed he should count himself lucky, but that also meant he’d just slipped and fallen in dirty dishwater in front of not only Marinette, but Ladybug.

He closed his eyes.  “Plagg, please let me die in peace.”  

“... Adrien?”

He felt her breath fan over his face, and his eyes back snapped open.

Her gray-blue eyes were hovering right above him.  Well, he had said he wanted to be closer to her.

“Y-yeah?”

“Please don’t die,” she said softly.  Her hand came up to cradle the side of his face—or maybe she was just trying to make sure he hadn’t bruised himself. “I l-love you too.”

Every one of his brain cells fizzled out.  She.  Loved him?

“I think I am dead.”  He smiled, reaching his arms around her.  “I’m pretty sure I just went to heaven.”

Her face flushed.  “You’re always going to be that cheesy, aren’t you?”

“Are you really surprised, Princess?”

“No.”  She leaned in, brushing her nose against his.  “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Ew, gross.”  Plagg gagged.  “This isn’t the kind of cheese I signed up for.”

“You’re the one who said she should put me out of my misery.”

“Yeah, well I think you both need to put this food out of its misery.  The soup’s burning.”

Marinette sprung up, eyes wide.  “Oh no!  We still have to get everything ready!  And the crêpe filling isn’t done and I haven’t finished the baozi—” 

“It’s okay!  We can still get it all done … somehow.”  Adrien winced as he stood up.  Now they were both covered in a mix of dishwater and crêpe filling.  “Just keep Plagg away from it all.  He’s the reason I ruined the pears.  Oh, and he’s the reason I was wearing that beret, too.”

She went back to work as if nothing had changed between them.  It was honestly kind of amazing how quickly she had the noodles and soup under control, like she hadn’t just been freaking out moments before.  

“He’s got as awful taste in fashion as he does in food?”  she asked.

“No—well, probably, but that’s not important.  The beret was to hide him so he could help me cook.  Like in Ratatouille.”

She blinked.  “That works?”

“It would work better if my kwami knew how to cook, but yeah.”

“Hmm …”  She tapped her lips—lips he would hopefully be able to kiss once all this was taken care of, he thought with a giddy grin—before snapping her fingers.  “That’s it!  I can’t believe I didn’t think of it before!”

“What’s it?  Wait—Marinette, where are you going?”

“You’ll see!”  She winked before disappearing behind her bedroom door.

He gave the soup a careful stir while waiting for her to come back.

“You’re welcome.”  Plagg crossed his arms and smirked irritatingly.

“For what?” Adrien scowled.  “All you did was give away my identity and embarrass me in front of the love of my life!”

“Love of your life?”  Marinette appeared behind him.

He nearly knocked over the pot of soup.  It was what he deserved for startling her so much back in lycée, he guessed.

Plagg snickered.  “Bold words coming from the guy who called her a good friend earlier.”

“She is a good friend!  And the love of my life!  She’s Ladybug, Plagg!”

He pointed to the giant red-and-black egg in Marinette’s arms.  The Miracle Box.  She was Ladybug!

“You didn’t know that when you said it five seconds ago,” Plagg pointed out.

“Yeah, well—I guessed it,” he huffed.  

It had been the only answer that made sense.  And it was true.  Hopefully he could blame the tears pricking his eyes on the onion in the soup.  If not, though, crying over his amazing partner (who loved him!) was probably still the least embarrassing thing he’d done today.

Tikki poked her head out of a cookie jar.  By now he’d been startled so many times that her presence hardly registered.

“Don’t worry, Adrien.  Marinette has said way more embarrassing stuff than that.”

“Which we won’t repeat in front of him,” Marinette said dangerously.

His head was still spinning from all the revelations.  Of course, he wasn’t too surprised—who else but Marinette was amazing enough to be Ladybug?—but it was still a lot to take in at once.

“While I definitely want to hear about that later, what’s the Miracle Box out for?  Is there a kwami of cooking?  Or do you think Sass could give us a Second Chance on all this mess?”  he asked, trying to bring his focus back to the problem at hand.

“What you said about Plagg gave me an idea.”  She punched in a code on the spots, and the egg cracked open to reveal the miraculouses.  “He might not know how to cook, but I’m sure some of the other kwamis do.  And if not, I’m sure they can follow directions.”

“Great idea, Marinette!”  Tikki clapped.  “Wayzz and Pollen are pretty good at cooking, from what I remember.  Orikko is too, but you shouldn’t cook chicken in front of him.”

“Makes sense.”  Adrien nodded before turning to Marinette.  “You think they’ll be enough to make up for how badly I messed up?”

“Of course they will.  We’re Ladybug and Chat Noir; there’s no mess we can’t fix.”  She smiled as she equipped the bracelet and hair comb, then passed the Miracle Box to him.  “Have Tikki help you pick out a few more kwamis.  Together we’ll get this done in time. I know it.”

Relief washed over him, and he smiled back.

“As you wish, My Lady.”

XXX

“You’re sure I won’t be intruding?”  Adrien asked as they pulled up to her parents’ bakery.

“Of course not.  There’s no way my family would leave out my boyfriend.”  She shifted her tupperware to her other arm and reached up to adjust his (newly cleaned) beret.  “Even if he has terrible fashion sense.”

“It’s a Marinette original!  There’s nothing more fashionable than that!”

“An original from when I was fourteen!”  she pouted.

“It’s too late, Bugaboo. I’m never taking it off.”  He kissed her forehead.

“I’ll make you a new one.  Anything would be better than mixing lacy hearts and stripes.”

“I guess that’s fair.  But I’ll still treasure this one forever.”

She rolled her eyes affectionately as she pushed open the bakery door.

Not long after, Adrien, Marinette, and her family were settled around the dining room table, a feast of French and Chinese cuisine in front of them. The two sides of her family mingled, mixing as seamlessly as the dishes.  Rolland was deep in conversation with Wang about traditional cooking techniques in France versus China.  Gina (who’d insisted he just call ‘Grandma’) was regaling two of Marinette’s cousins with tales from her travels.  More of her younger cousins ran around the table, barefoot soles slapping against the hardwood floor, their hands occasionally reaching up to snag a dumpling or croissant.  It was a tight fit, but Adrien didn’t mind.  He was thrilled to be included at all.

While they ate dinner, he kept catching her looking at the hat.  But every time she did, he’d make eye contact with her, and then she’d blush and smile bright enough that it was worth every glare.

“So, what are you up to these days, son?”  Tom asked over his bowl of wonton soup.

Son.  Already, Marinette’s parents felt more like family than his own.  He would love to be part of her family for as long as she would let him.

Hopefully forever.

“Oh, not much.”  He put an arm around Marinette.  “Just learning how to cook from your amazing daughter.”

He winked, and she blushed again.  Red was her color in and out of the suit, it seemed.

“He needs all the help he can get.  You should’ve seen what he almost put in the crêpes today.”

Tom laughed.  “Well, it looks like it all turned out perfect.  Thanks for your help, both of you.”

Under the table, Adrien and Marinette shared a fistbump.  This wasn’t the first adventure they tackled together, and it wouldn’t be the last.

[theatregaymer]

You need to Relax~ SuzaLulu sfw tickle fic

Here is a pairing I’ve long been a fan of.  Suzaku was my first muse back when I started roleplaying on here and enjoying it.  A friend of mine @ticklish-v-93​ and I got together for a sfw tickle fic since we know a lot of us like sfw as well as nsfw.  I’ll upload one or two of those later but this one is more for everyone!

As the bugs sang to the evening sky, Suzaku Kururugi was making his way...or rather slugging his way home.  Having just finished another group cram session, he'd long since passed when he thought he would be home.  But when the groove hits ya, you just have to ride it...right?  He'd been preparing for these final exams like his life depended on them, his work taking up a lot of his time though, thus resulting in his stress levels and fatigue being higher than they were even back in midterms.

College life really was exhausting, though he did know he was luckier than most, having someone to come back to amidst all his internal exhaustion.As he opened the door to the apartment they shared, the man left his size eleven shoes at the door before calling out.  "Lelouch?  You still up?  Mmph sorry I took so long, you got my text though right?"  He'd sent word ahead as they agreed, when he would likely be home late and not to wait up for him to eat dinner, he usually got by on vending machine ramen or something depending on if the cafe on campus was still open.  He came out of the entryway and felt his shoulders relax slightly, his lover seated on the couch with the television showing some kind of film he hadn't really seen before.  He let his bag rest along the side of the couch for now, knowing he'd be hitting the books first thing in the morning while he ate breakfast to save time.  "Hey, you could have gone to bed ya know?"

Lelouch had dozed off with the tv on as he waited up for his boyfriend. It being finals he saw how Suzaku cramed for his exams and overworked himself. Lelouch himself had one more paper to turn in. Yet since he was almost done he could give his boyfriend tlc.He rubbed his eyes and perked up as he smiled at his boyfriend. "Su, welcome back." he beckoned him over, wanting to greet him properly. "I know but I felt bad and decided to wait up for you. So how did it go? Today was your last day finishing everything right?" He asked as he watched him make his way tiredly to the couch.

The brunet wavered for only a second, having his own mind somewhat sluggish at the moment.  Suzaku undid the few buttons on his top, part of his chest being revealed as he let himself relax around his best friend, roommate and partner in life.  "I hope you at least ate something...mmph yeah the big stuff is done but..."  He knew Lelouch wouldn't like it, but he couldn't rest on his laurels yet.  As one of the only Japanese students here at their university it was almost like he felt he had to excel in all his scholarly aspects in order to show any of his peers or even teachers that he was not just some lucky transfer student. "I still have some minor things to go over before next week.  Nothing that will keep me out late but, I won't be puttin the books down just yet."  He said with a smile, trying to keep their soft and loving mood going rather than get a lecture at this hour.  His rear end finally sinking into the cushions, the boy reclined somewhat instantaneously with a groan as he could have sworn he felt a pop in his back  after having been hunched over all day.

Lelouch listened, and with each word he had a concerned and disapproving expression before he finally sighed and shook his head as he settled beside him. He understood why his boyfriend worked so hard, he knew of some of the professors and students who didn't believe he earned his place in the school. So to prove them wrong he go back over his completed assignments before final submission, being meticulous as he searched for any error he missed or reworking. "Haa Suzu...I won't lecture you, because I understand why."  He shot him a soft yet loving scolding look. "So I'm gonna use a different method...you can lay on my lap and rest properly or I make you." He let his eyes narrow as he patted his lap. "If you don't at least break properly you won't be in tip top form." He wasn't upset but didn't like the way his lover would overwork himself because idiots couldn't get over the fact that he was a genius.

Suzaku smiled initially, the warm words of understanding coming from Lelouch and washing over him.  He could kiss him right now, sloppy as his tired kisses could be.  However he caught the look in those eyes right away and knew he was still in trouble, even without a lecture.  "Eehehehe...s-seriously?  I mean I'm grateful and all, I mean...I accept...thanks."  He was too tired to defend himself right now anyways, and an argument usually ended with him getting outwitted anyways.  He grunted and stretched out, a grunt eeking out of his throat as he took a second to find a comfy position with his head resting on Lelouch's thighs, his legs being long enough that his ankles rested on the arm of the couch.  "Mmm this is actually...kinda nice, heh.  If your legs get numb though you need to let me know."  He could just study tomorrow once he woke up right?  Lelouch wouldn't mind that...he hoped.

Lelouch rolled his eyes at the adorable doofus of a boyfriend flicking him teasingly on the forehead with a smirk. "Yes, and you should be." when he was comfortable he leaned down pecking his forehead. "Sure sure, I will but first." he squeezed his cheeks. "I hope you aren't thinking about studying..." he could tell when Suzaku was making plans in his head. His brow would lightly furrow in the cutest of ways and his eyes would slightly darken in thought. Completely unnoticeable if you didn't grow up with him. "Suuuzaakuu~" he drawled out his name as he smooshed his cheeks. "If you are I’m going to take matters into my own hands...literally." he smirked as his fingers started playing with his ears.

The brunet was caught red handed, how was Lelouch able to see what he was thinking so easily!?  Well then again, the two had been friends since childhood, even after so much time apart they'd gotten right back into their friendship so quickly.  And developing that relationship further into what it was now...well there were bound to be things they knew about one another after all that time. Through squished cheeks and the teasing of his ears, Suzaku attempted to explain himself...or at least lie.  "No noho hehe I pwomishheheh hehey oomph come on Lelouch Ihi'm too tired for that."  He said, not even thinking of where it might lead his boyfriend since there were certain things about him Lelouch liked to exploit to gain an advantage.  That was his style after all, exploit a weakness and turn it into your own strength.

He knew it! Well at least he can distract him from such thoughts. "Ohhh, I can't tell, you must not be that tired if you can think of plans, so you can handle this!" he chirped fingers moving to his neck. "I think this is just what you need. Proper punishment for overworking yourself." he said over him. "I bet you even planned to sleep for a certain amount of hours then waking up early to finish whatever things you had left to do." he said alternating between tickling his ears and neck.

"Pffthehehehaha oh ohoh noho come ohohonahah!"  Lelouch was nothing if not thorough, sometimes overly so.  His thought processes moved at a staggering rate leaving Suzaku little room to mentally maneuver around whatever he could say.  "HAha nah no please Ihi swearhahaha ack come ohon mercy you knohow how it tickles!"  Suzaku weakly began trying to curl up, being comfortable enough to not want to leave this spot as he turned his face into the other's stomach to laugh his heart out.

Lelouch cooed at the action trying not to laugh himself. Because it was finals the two didn't really have that much quality time together besides a kiss here and there. With how much their schedules kept them separated and busy. So now here he was, tired as they both were he couldn't wait until they were done. It was time to collect!! "Awww nope let me feed off that sweet laughter!" He snickered and moved his fingers to his ears. "Ahh mercy? Nono how bout some food, likeeee raspberries!" He chirped with out warning attached his lips to his exposed neck and blews light raspberries and nibbling at the exposed skin.

Suzaku was completely at the other's mercy now, those exploratory fingers wreaking havoc on him even with only these light attentions.  "HAha ah wahaha noho nono KYAAHAahha!"  The raspberry, dear god why was he still so vulnerable to those things at his age?  Lelouch's lips were soft, perfect to vibrate against his neck and make the poor guy buck and squirm around some more.  "MMhmhmhmhmph!  Looohouch meheanie!"  He complained, letting out a bit more of an undignified and childish side of himself while trying to curl up.

At the comment Lelouch growled playfully then delivered another loud raspberry. He giggled himself as his lover squirmed around, it was nice to hear his laughter, if anything he was addicted. So to gain more he shot his hands to his sides poking and squeezing. "Mnmnm pbbttt..mhuaahh!" He lifted his head. "Not nice to call names mister tease!" He chimed grinning down at him. "Mean would be me cuffing you to the bed and tickling you until sun up." He snickered. "Plus, I can't trust you to stay still enough before you dash out that door again!" He said finding an unprotected spot and digging his fingers in.

Suzaku moved like a man possessed.  Lelouch choosing to target his poor sides had him twitching and wriggling about in that lap, only slightly managing to not fall off the couch at this point.  "BWHAHAh ahah AH staha no no that's haha not fahahirhah!  Youhu wouldn't!"  The only time they'd actually done cuffs with tickling was one of Suzaku's birthdays, definitely a wake up call he never forgot.  "HIhihehehaha AH AHAHA I WIHIHLL Pleehehasehaha just move somewhere eleehehehse!"  The brunet pleaded, knowing and accepting that this sort of punishment was inevitable.  He didn't hate it, liked it sometimes in fact, but Lelouch knew that and always tended to keep him in suspense as to when he would strike.

"Hmmm?" Hummed playfully as he heard his words. "Completely fair love." He said over his laughter. "Ohhh think I won't when I will...hehe this time I won't buuuuttt. Next time when you least expect it." He told him thinking maybe once their exams were over he would reward him in his own special way. "Huh? Move?" His smile turned downright evil. "You said it...not me!" He changed his position a little and stretched over him and went for his hips.

The ideas for such a wild night were not completely lost on the brunet, but at the same time his entire being wasn't really in on any conversations right now.  He barely caught a glimpse of Lelouch's wickedly playful smirk before his lithe hips were seized.  "Whahat are you GYAAHAHAA aAH AHA NONONONHIOHOHHAHAIHIHI!"  One of his top three spots no doubt, the hips  had never been somewhere Suzaku thought himself to be vulnerable until Lelouch got ahold of them.  Something about his delicate fingers, his touch almost like an artist molding a masterpiece...Suzaku had no chance at preventing such embarrassing and rapid paced laughter from bursting forth.

"There we go! Wow!" He chuckled himself as he squeezed his hips, digging his thumbs into the groves then moving up to his sides then his ribs and with some struggle was trying to get to his armpits " Yes! Let me get your armpits!" He said giddy from the situation. "Let me in Suzu!" He said sweetly and he focused on his ribs since his arms were clamped down. They should be sleeping after all but did not want to pass up this chance of physical affection. "This is helping both of us! You look so refreshed!" He grinned as he continued to assault him with tickles as he became more drunk off his laughter.

High pitched cackling, soft moments of silent laughter in between louder fits of uncontrollable giggles, Lelouch had him right where he wanted him to be sure.  "HAhaha...eheh ah no nohoh please no aharmpihihitshshsheheha!"  The poor brunet was writhing, desperately trying to think of what he could do to defend himself even in the slightest as his arms stayed as closely tightened as possible.  He bent them at the elbow though, trying to lean into Lelouch and tickle with his hands where he could as payback, despite knowing that in this situation he definitely couldn't be as effective, nor get at the really good spots.

"Dont worry I'll get them eventually! Maybe I should go for your fe-eheheehet!" Lelouch jumped a laugh as he felt his hands get active below him and pulled back just to clasped both hands. "Oh you little sneak hehe!" he grinned down at him as he allowed for a brief breather keeping their hands clasped. "Maybe I should go for your neck again for that little stunt." It was no secret that he was just as ticklish as his boyfriend. Just he was better at hiding it and getting the upper hand on Suzaku.

Grinning as he at least got a bit of a breather, Suzaku knew he made the right call after hearing Lelouch's next targets.  "Heheh...mmmhmhmhm, Maybe instehead, we can work out a deal?"  He asked, not to get more studies after, but to make sure he could obtain some payback when his own torment was ended.  "I'll let you get one of the spots...heh the pits or the feet.  But in return...I'm gonna get you back, on your back."  He grinned widely, knowing the other boy had quite the sensitive spine...and he loved playing him like a piano.  Sure he was at a disadvantage, but if his own hands were in check now, that meant Lelouch couldn't keep tickling him either.

Lelouch listened to his offer with an amused smirk, usually he was the one planning and making deals that would give him the upper hand. Yet as he stared down at his boyfriend he couldn't help but shake his head with a small laugh. "Striking a deal huh? You drive a hard bargain!" he thought about it and almost wanted to decline and go back to tickling him. This was suppose to be a 'punishment'...Thaaat quickly turned into self indulgence. Plus his back was his worst spot and he hated his laughter when he was tickled their. "Haha alright, it only fair," he leaned down capturing those lips briefly. "Mmnn lets see," he thought about what he wanted and decided to target the spot he was closest too. "Give me those pits Mr.Tease." he grinned down at him.

He was glad Lelouch was so understanding and willing to deal with his bit of selfishness at least in this regard.  Of course, even though he knew one of those spots would be subjected to torture, he still struggled for a moment to lower his guard as he looked up at Lelouch while getting comfy again.  "Mmhmhmhm crap.  I swehear you better be ready for my turn."  Arms tentatively moving at a snail's pace, he jerked a little out of fear a couple times before reaching up and gripping the armrest of the couch for support, his pits wide open and practically wearing a sign that said kill me now.

"Oh dont worry I will be." he chuckled booping his nose. "Now arms up Suzu!" he said showing him his hands, snickering at the flinches and hesitation before he finally yielded. "Aww that's cute," he giggled at his expression. "Don't worry I won't be long!" He dug in before he could clamp his arms. "Tickle tickle Mr.tease!" He taunted with a grin. He was most likely gonna get it worse for the teasing but at least it was worth it just to see that gorgeous smile.

Though his arms did jerk a bit, Suzaku kept his hands holding firmly to the couch, even when his legs bucked into the air at the sudden and intense feeling of his poor pits falling under fire.  "GWAHAHah haah ahah AH AHAH LELOHOHOUCHEHEHAH Oh MY gahahadhahaha!"  The brunet's laughter continued unhindered, his vocals rising up an octave on occasion as he certainly didn't feel tired anymore, though that would probably hit him later after things calmed down.

Lelouch happily indulged himself as he continued scribbling his fingers in the spot. To futher mess with his boyfriend he gasped. "Woah Suzu I think I feel a hair trying to come in!" He pinch and clawed switching between hard and soft tickles just enjoying the sight and sound he continued for a moment more before stopping and simply rubbing his hands down his side. "See was that so bad?" He cooed moving bangs from his forehead.

"HEHEHAAAHAHA AHAHA AH NOHOHO You HEHEHAHAha!  LeLOUHUHUHUCH!"  The poor boy squealed, legs flopping about again until his love seemed to finally take some pity on him.  Suzaku was panting groaning as his arms came down and tried rubbing the feeling away.  He looked up at Lelouch, playfully pushing out his lower lip with a huff.  "Mmph...i'm so gonna get you double time."  He declared with a pout, having another spot in mind that he knew would put Lelouch in a similar state.

"Hehe I know you will!" He kissed those lips again. "But was it really that bad?" He cooed as he scratched through his scalp. "You look better too." He tapped his forehead. "And not as grimy like earlier...well you could use a shower and some shampoo." He teased just to mess with him. "Maybeee I should continue and get those cuffs." He strecthed moving to stand.

Suzaku huffed in a joking manner, sitting upright and stretching himself before blinking slightly and turning to snatch Lelouch around the waist.  Just like that, his strength was practically fully functional as he pulled the boy back onto the couch with him.  "Ooohoho no, I think you're gonna stay right here mister tickle monster."  His superior athleticism gave quite the advantage here as once he was in control it would be nigh impossible for his more intellectual partner to escape him.  And thus he playfully pushed Lelouch down face first, cackling like a playful villain before he shoved his hands up the back of his shirt and began doodling different lines, circles and swirls along his bare skin.

Lelouch shrieked with a laugh as he was pulled back down. "W-wahahait pft Suzaku!" He flailed as they wrestled and he was maneuvered on his back, he should have worked more on gaining muscles along with his intellect. "Nononono pfthehee kyaha mnff." He bit his lip and covered his mouth as he grabbed a pillow tossing it at his boyfriend. His legs kicked as one of his most ticklish areas was exposed. 

"Pffthahah hehey now I didn't use weapons!"  Suzaku complained playfully, using claw motions to crawl up his boyfriend's back and then down along his ribs and flanks, giving him squeezes all the way down.  The whole time he was shifting his weight, dodging as much as he could while feeling Lelouch writhe in agony underneath him.  He may be rather ticklish himself, but his dainty partner was for sure much more wild and unstable when you got him in a good spot.  "I wonder if your feet are worse than your back Lelouch, what do you think?"  He teased, not even really pausing as he continued to work his thumbs into the other's waist.

“Pfahahaaa!" He bucked with a pitchy laugh as he felt those fingers making him arch out of control. "Hahaha arhghahaha Suzakahahahaha!" He tried to roll onto his back to escape the feeling but his body was heavy and had all his weight on top him. Plus the tickling was taking all the fight out of him. "Nohohoohohoho! Oh my gohohohosh!" He clamped his arms down to his sides as some form of protection.

"Oh?  No you say?  Noooo?  Not here then, well we might as well try the other spot."  Suzaku happily announced before pulling his hands back and turning around.  Seated on Lelouch's butt now, the brunet reached down and, after a bit of struggling, grabbed both of Lelouch's ankles and hoisted them towards him.  He made a habit of drawing out this particular torture, starting to scratch and scribble his fingers along both soles with one hand.

"Thahahahats nohohoht what I meantehehehe!" he cackled with a squeal and groan, he tried to keep his feet hidden and out of his lover's grasp and shreiked as he was caught. "Nononoooo Suzuhuhuhu pft I hahahahate you so much!" he pounded at the couch as the worse torture began. Oh this was war! if he could reach back and get him he would.

Suzaku giggled wickedly, having an almost sinister cackling sound to his voice as he eagerly stripped the boy's socks away and went doubletime over both feet.  Heel to toe, back and forth, he didn't really let up until he was suddenly rubbing each toe instead, cooing his boyfriend to calm him down.  "Hahaha there there, gosh your feet are so ticklish Lulu~"  He teased with the nickname their friends came up with, knowing that if he wasn't blushing from his undignified response, that would get him heated in a hurry.

"Nohohoho GAHAhahahaaha!"  he laughed out as he struggled to try and get free but could only laugh and toss and turn. "Ahahaaha...ahh haa pft hehehe ahh haha..." He gave a laughing glare to his boyfriend as he all but melted and laid there blushing heavily at the nickname he groaned hiding his face in the cushion. "Thahahats not my fault you ass." came the muffled response. Though he was happy Suzaku was in better spirits. "Your just as t-ticklish there too!" he said still refusing to show his heated face.

Suzaku couldn't stop smiling at how cute Lelouch was with his guard down, his normal walls no longer preventing his real self to shine through. The muffled protests were mostly easy to make out, Suzaku gathering there was some return taunts as well as accusations. "Sorry what was that?"  He said playfully, fingers digging into the soft balls of the other's feet for a second to get a renewed reaction.  "Hehhe not my fault you didn't take advantage." The brunet couldn't help but enjoy this ticklish little time they had together, the stress almost wiped completely from his mind due to Lelouch's influence.

"Kyahaha! Hehehehe!" Lelouch bucked with a shriek flushed face coming out of hiding as he laughed. Only Suzaku could bring this side out of him, making him break through all that regal and mature persona to the wind and be as immature as he wanted. He was more than happy to be able to act like this around him.  "Ahahaha! I saihhihihid you're j-just as ticklish too youhuhuhu ass!" He giggled out covering his face as he struggled to reach back   and aimed a squeeze at his knee. If he wanted him to take advantage more he would as much as he could.

Suzaku saw this coming, the inevitable countermove by his chess loving partner.  But he was ready, quickly snatching said arm and holding it out so he could in turn reach in and reintroduce the vulnerable armpit to tickles again.  "Ooohohoho bad moove Lulu~  Oooohohoho tickle tickle tickle hehehe.  Oomph!"  Suzaku grunted as he let up and laid down on top of the other's back, making sure to hug him from behind and prevent any further tickle attacks.  "But you win, no studying, no stress....yawn aaaall relaxation...mmm starting with a nap here."

"OH SHIHIHIT! Suhuhuhuahahaha!GAhahahaha!" He tried to clasp his arm down yet all he could was lay there and take it. "Hahaha ahh hngnn." He panted and flinch as those arms wrapped around him, thinking he was going to go for his stomach yet relaxed when that wasn't the case. "Uhng Suzaku get off so we can at least cuddle in the bed! Dont crush me hereeee!" he whined playfully trying to turn in his arms. "I know you aren't asleep that fast!"

Suzaku playfully make snoring sounds, exhaling and blowing into Lelouch's ears once or twice before he giggled and got up.  "Cuddles sound good to me hehe.  You gonna make me breakfast tomorrow?"  He asked teasingly, offering his hand with that casual smile that Lelouch no doubt fell for a long time ago.

"Nyahaha Suzahahaha...hgn hahaha..ahh!" He rubbed at his ears before taking his hand with a laugh face still flushed as he stood. At the breakfast comment he pinched his sides. "Wise guy...psh it was going to be a surprise. Now im not sure." He smirked walking past him into the room. "But if you get yourself a full eight hours then maybe I'll think about... now shower and come to bed. If you start working I  swear to tickle you again until you pass out!" He beckoned him with a finger. " But if you want I'll keep you company in the shower and wash you hair~" he purred.

Suzaku nodded, feeling the alert status he'd gained from the tickles begin to wear off.  Of course as he rubbed the back of his head and stretched, he couldn't help but hear the subtle meaning behind Lelouch's words as he walked away.  "Huh?  H-hey Lelouch!  Wait a sec, together!  I want you to wash my hair!"  He quickly chased after him, knowing what that kind of tone meant for the tactical genius that never failed to put him in check.  He'd get that sleep, but the night was clearly still young...

[bubbyleh]

I See La Vie en Rose - Chapter 2

Tommy texting moments.

Chapter 2: Texts From Heaven, Today!

Tommy: Hey there! It’s me, the guy from the park. I didn’t introduce myself yesterday, so my name’s Tommy :)

With a sigh, Tommy places his phone back down on his desk. It took him ten minutes to come up with that text, but now that it’s finally done, he can focus on today’s work! He picks up a paper, ready to get started on reading some prayers.

After two seconds of reading, Tommy’s phone buzzes. He has to physically stop himself from reaching out for it because he already fell behind on work yesterday. If he lets himself get distracted today, things might get a little fucky down on Earth.

But… what if it’s Darnold?

Just the thought of that is enough to convince Tommy to check.

Gordon Freeman: [Image Attachment] Gordon Freeman: [Image Attachment] Gordon Freeman: [Image Attachment]

Tommy doesn’t have to check to know that they’re all pictures of Joshua. Every so often Gordon spams them all with Josh pics, and while Tommy loves the kid, he’d rather drop in for a visit than have his phone blown up. He sees Joshua practically every day, the cloud they live on isn’t that big!

Dang, he regrets teaching everyone how to use phones.

While Tommy’s clearing his notifications, another message comes in.

Darnold Pepper: Hi Tommy! Darnold Pepper: How are you doing?

Ack! Tommy feels a heart attack coming, and he’s technically immune to those!

Tommy: I’m doing good! :D Getting some work done. What about you?

While Darnold types out his reply, Tommy looks back to the prayer he’s received. It’s just a kid who wants help finding their lost pencil. He can’t help but smile a little at that. With a kiss (not a necessary step, but Tommy likes to think it adds a little extra luck), Tommy folds the paper. It begins to glow as he drops it out his window, down towards the Earth.

Darnold Pepper: That’s good to hear! I’m actually also supposed to be doing work, but then you texted me!

All the prayers serve to do is add a little bit of luck. Increases your odds. There’s no way Tommy can get through every prayer that comes in on any given day, but he supposes that’s how the system balances itself out.

Tommy: Oh, I didn’t mean to bother you! You can get back to work, and we can text later :(

Tommy reads another prayer. Someone wants to find their way to the cloud. No. Denied. Mortals aren’t allowed up here for a reason. He balls the paper up and tosses it aside, secure in the knowledge it will disappear once tomorrow begins.

Darnold Pepper: You’re not bothering me! Darnold Pepper: Actually, do you want to hear about what I’m doing? It sounds weird, but talking to you yesterday actually helped.

That’s not surprising, though it was unintended. People tend to take Tommy’s title as God of Discovery quite literally, though anyone who does their research into the Gods would know that his power tends to extend a little bit into the metaphorical and intangible, such as inspiration and research.

Tommy: Go ahead! I’m reading your texts between tasks. :)

Darnold Pepper: Okay. Darnold Pepper: You know how we talked about soda yesterday? Darnold Pepper: Well I want to make one. But it’s going to be really special! Darnold Pepper: See, I have a background in potion-making, and I think soda is great. So I thought, why not combine them? Darnold Pepper: The hard part is mostly figuring out how to get a good taste AND a good effect.

Tommy’s eyes are blown wide, but honestly he feels it’s justified.

Tommy: Are you serious!?

Darnold Pepper: Is it a bad idea?

Tommy: No! It’s amazing! It’s an incredible idea! Tommy: Using alchemy in sodas could be so useful! Like if you’re really tired after working out! Or if you spend a late night working! :D Tommy: How has nobody thought of this before? Regular potions taste like crap!

Darnold Pepper: Well, that’s the hard part.

Hard part, huh? Tommy has a feeling he can help with that.

Tommy: Do you ever, um… Tommy: Ask people for help?

Darnold Pepper: Oh! Er. Darnold Pepper: Not really. I don’t know a lot of people who COULD help, you know? Darnold Pepper: Sometimes when I start the day, I pray? It sounds kind of weird, but praying to the God of Discovery kind of makes me feel like I might get it today?

Praying to…

Darnold’s been praying to Tommy? Aw, dang. Tommy can feel his entire face heat up. He even knows he can pray to him for ideas!

Darnold Pepper: Sorry, that’s stupid. Darnold Pepper: Wait. Were you asking to help me?

Tommy’s too flustered to even think about what he says next.

Tommy: Yes! Tommy: And it’s not stupid! >:(

Darnold Pepper: Well, I mean… Darnold Pepper: It hasn’t really gotten me anywhere.

Oh this guy! Tommy’ll show him! All he has to do is… ignore everyone else in the whole world and sort through his giant pile of prayers until he finds Darnold’s. Which he knows for a fact the others will chide him for.

Hm.

“Sunkist!” Tommy calls out, and he can hear her stir downstairs. Then, the sound of her scaling the stairs that wind around their tower-like residence, and finally, she makes her way to the top floor, Tommy’s workroom.

“Hey, Sunkist.” He pats her head, because she’s a good girl. “You remember- you remember that guy we met yesterday?”

Sunkist does a soft woof, which Tommy knows to be an affirmative.

“Well.” Tommy fidgets with his fingers. Damn it, where did he leave his stim bracelets again? He eyes the pile of prayers, an ever-growing stack of paper. “Do you think you could find his prayer in here for me?”

Sunkist looks at the papers in the center of the room. Then she looks back at Tommy.

“Please?”

Sunkist doesn’t move.

Tommy sighs. “We’ll- we’ll go to the nice pet store we like. And I’ll get you a new chew toy! A- a big one!”

That seems to do it for her. Sunkist begins sniffing around the pile, circling a few times before she unexpectedly dives in. Tommy laughs at her, turning back to his phone as he does so.

Tommy: Anyway Tommy: Do you want me to help out? Tommy: I’m not always going to be available :( I have a job and all. Tommy: But! You could say I have “pretty lax hours” Tommy: So it’ll be often! :)

Sunkist emerges from the pile with a paper in her mouth. Tommy pets her for a job well-done, taking the paper as Sunkist wags her tail. He also picks up a few that his dog managed to trail behind her, because he really should get back to work.

Tommy reads Darnold’s prayer.

I pray for the knowledge to make potions taste like something a human could willingly ingest.

Tommy takes a picture of that, for his own sake. Then, he kisses the paper, folds it, and drops it out of his window. He watches as the shimmering disappears, because… that felt good. Better than almost any other prayer had.

Weird. Tommy was more used to feeling happiness about his luck granting a while after the fact.

Darnold Pepper: I’d be honored for you to work with me. Darnold Pepper: And don’t worry about scheduling! Just text me when you’re available, and if I’m not making potions, we can at least hang out. Darnold Pepper: :)

Tommy: Cool! Tommy: I REALLY should start working again, haha. Tommy: My coworkers make fun of me when I fall behind :/

Darnold: That’s fine! We can start talking again later. Darnold: Oh I just realized. Darnold: What do you do for work, Tommy?

Crap. Uh.

Tommy: Just boring office stuff. Tommy: You wouldn’t really be interested.

[pinetasticapple]

What if we had known each other first and fallen in love second

Chapter 3: The Bubbler

Also on ao3 and ffnet

To think Paris was going to start getting used to a magical terrorist was something Marinette never would have thought possible, yet here she was, fighting villains straight out of comic books and what not from said magical bad guy.

And it had been only a few weeks since she had accepted her role as Ladybug, wielder of the Ladybug miraculous and the responsibility of saving the city. Not to mention school was getting more and more difficult and tasks were piling up for sure.

The ambience in the classroom had shifted a little. After she had finally stood up to Chloe, it just seemed to have brought good and bad things. Sure, she had now a new friend in Alya who was new to the classroom and had never seen how they were, and the others were moving from classmates to casual conversationalists, but Chloe had gotten, if anything, a little worse to deal with.

Good thing she wasn’t alone on this.

“That patrol wasn’t so bad,” Chat smirked once he landed on the beam Ladybug was currently sitting on, watching the Parisian street lights “but I got nothing on our local supervillain.”

“And how much of that patrol was you actually testing your vaulting off rooftops?” she raised an eyebrow at him.

“Just a 25% percent” Chat grinned.

“Right” she rolled her eyes “I’ll just go easy on you because your birthday is tomorrow.”

Chat beamed.

“Did you get word from your dad about the party?”

His smile dimmed.

“I’ll find out tomorrow but I don’t have my hopes up,” his legs dangled from the beam, clawed fingers gripping the metal as he spoke. Marinette reached out to hold one hand and give a reassuring squeeze. She couldn’t begin to understand the loneliness and sadness Adrien faced day after day with a distant father, but to ignore even his own child’s birthday? It was unforgivable.

Adrien and her had started on a weird but thankful start. Between knowing each other before officially introducing themselves, the misunderstanding of the chewing gum and the sudden job they were both hiding from everyone but them, Marinette found in Adrien a close friend, a confidant, someone she was starting to rely on and knew he was getting there as well.

“Well, rest assured you will get at least a birthday pastry tomorrow,” she offered a small smile “I’ll stick a candle to a croissant if I have to.”

Chat chortled at that.

“Wouldn’t it be better a cupcake or something alike?”

“Well yes, but you seem to have grown fond of croissants” she shrugged and stood up, her yo-yo ready to be thrown “see you tomorrow then?”

“Of course” he bowed “have a good evening my lady.”

Ladybug rolled her eyes again “you are not quitting on that one, aren’t you?”

“Why should I?” Chat pulled out his baton “you’re Ladybug, a lady and royal.”

“I’m not- “

“Oh indulge me, I watched Sailor Moon last night again,” he grinned and jumped away, leaving Ladybug to sigh and smile as she made her way to her room.

Marinette let her transformation dropped and smiled at Tikki. She looked at the nicely wrapped gift on her desk and jumped to her bed to sleep.

The past days her and Adrien had spent at least two to three nights a week getting to know how their powers worked. Since Adrien’s schedule was over the top, late night was the only time they could really get the hang of it.

Besides, akumas were most likely to pop out during the day. It seemed Hawkmoth also needed to sleep every now and then.

In those days Marinette had got to know her partner in “superheroing” as a dork who loved puns, animation and pastries. He was funny, kind and knew how to lighten up the mood for sure. But Marinette had noticed his personality didn’t flourish as much during school time, a little more concealed and proper, as if he was under watch or something alike.

Mostly about his father. Marinette had followed the Agreste line as a fashion inspiration but to know the personal side of Gabriel Agreste? Well, that was something entirely different to what she thought.

She tried not to think about that. Maybe they’d have some luck and Adrien would get to enjoy a good birthday.

Hours later the phone was buzzing and ringing her awake, startling her from her bed onto the floor.

“Ack!” she rubbed her backside and glanced at the phone. Why had she put her alarm so early again?

Wrap croissant, have gift ready, right. Marinette patted her cheeks and got ahead to be ready for the day.

At the same time that morning Adrien was already having what had to be nominated as worst birthday breakfast ever. His mood only soured more when Nathalie told him the birthday party was a no go. What was the point of turning fourteen then?

He kept his frown all the way to school, where at least Nino tried to insist in having the party.

And the thing was, Adrien did want it. He was curious about what they would do unlike the stuffy high class ones he was used to. Would they have dynamic music? What about the food? And the outfits? The more Adrien thought about it the more he really wanted to have this party.

It was all he could think about all day until lunch time arrived.

“You know what? I’m going to have a little convo with your pops,”

Oh that was a bad idea.

“Don’t waste your time” Adrien sighed “he’s not going to change his mind.”

“He said no?”

Adrien turned to see Marinette walking towards them, Alya next to her. She was holding a small bag in front of her.

“Is that…?”

“Happy Birthday Adrien” Marinette smiled and offered the bag to him.

Adrien opened it without hesitation, snorting at the croissant with a single green candle stuck in the middle. He pulled it out and proceed to eat the pastry instead, not withholding the moan of satisfaction from it.

“Thanks Marinette,” he devoured the rest of it “I mean it.”

Marinette gave him a small smile, only to feel her center of gravity shoved as well as the rest of her body thanks to Chloe pushing her to a side. Right, she was still there.

“Happy Birthday Adrien!” Chloe nearly tackled him, leaving a smudge of lipstick on his cheek “did you receive the gift I sent you?”

Marinette withheld from rolling her eyes, especially after Adrien’s apologetic look. Yeah, Marinette couldn’t still stand Chloe but she was Adrien’s childhood friend.

A brat nonetheless but her friend.

It was a good thing Adrien was getting more friends.

“Uh, no?” Adrien would have known. He also knew clear as day Chloe forgot about it. She was never good at keeping track of days. A part of him wanted to peek behind him to confirm Sabrina was probably by the door with the calendar on her phone. He sent Marinette another smile to apologize but Chloe was rambling about getting some delivery guys to give it tonight.

“That was…something,” Alya raised an eyebrow.

“That’s Chloe,” Adrien shrugged as he wiped the rest of crumbs away from his fingers “but anyway, I should get going,” he pulled out his phone with a frown “have a photoshoot.”

“What? But today- “

“Hey, I’ll see you after lunch” Adrien smiled at them and walked towards the car that had just showed up.

“This sucks,” Marinette and Nino said almost at the same time.

“I’m going to speak with Adrien’s old man,”

“Do you think that’s a good idea?” Marinette looked at him.

“Worth a shot” Nino capped his bubble bottle and smiled at the girls “I’ll let you know of it.”

Marinette had a bad feeling of how that was going to go down. It was then that she remembered she had Adrien’s gift in her bag.

“Ah shoot,” she frowned “Nino! Wait!”

“Yeah?”

“Could you leave this for him?” she pulled out the wrapped gift “I would but I have to go back home now and- “

“No problem dudette!” Nino took it and smiled, making his way to the Agreste mansion.

Adrien sunk on the car seat. The photoshoot didn’t take long but it was still a bummer to work on his birthday. He wondered if he could convince Nino and Marinette of getting a small cake for afternoon classes or something when he finally reached home.

But what he saw at the entrance was definitely a surprise.

Adrien was also surprised Nino was granted an audience, considering how busy his father always seemed to be to even spend a meal with his own son.

“Nino?” Adrien walked towards him, just as Nino continued rambling all of Adrien’s extracurricular activities. His heart warmed, to have a friend willing to face his father, but Gabriel’s stare only downed that emotion, knowing it was futile.

“I decide what’s best for my son,” Adrien heard his icy tone “in fact, I’ve just decided you are a bad influence and you are not welcomed in my house ever again! Leave now!”

Say what now?

Adrien tried to refute but Gabriel had already turned around and left.

“Nino, wait!” he went after his friend, hurt as he looked Nino’s anger turn to a frown and sad then anger again as he left his home.

Adrien wanted to yell. No, he wanted to yell at his father. Call him out of what he had done to one of his friends!

“Adrien, you should head to the dining room for lunch or you’ll be late for your next lessons” Nathalie called after him.

Adrien closed the door and marched to eat what would be a lonely, dull lunch. He pulled out his phone to text Marinette about what had happened, hoping that maybe she would catch up with Nino and help her find a solution to the situation.

He was halfway his meal –which was mostly greens and a slice of bread- when he got a text from her.

Buginette: Might be too late to comfort him

Too late? Adrien tossed the napkin and stood up, noting how quieter his house was.

“Nathalie? Father?” he called out but received no answer.

Oh no, was Nino akumatized? It had to be the only thing that came to Adrien’s mind as he typed an answer to Marinette, only to be startled by the sudden “SURPRISE!” shout in front of him.

“Hey, hey, hey birthday boy!”

Adrien looked up to see a very obvious akuma standing on a bubble calling for his attention. He was dressed in black and red with blue skin and, wait, was that a tank top or an armor? Adrien had to wonder if Hawkmoth knew anything about villain design or if this was the mere subconscious of the victims.

Oh, right. The akumatized victim was talking about a party and had bubbles and…wait the voice was a little familiar.

“Nino!?”

“Let’s get this party started!” the Bubbler jumped to a dj set and started to play a catchy song that had his classmates dancing, but Adrien sneaked back into his home.

Oh this was bad. He knew what he had to do for sure. Nino was his friend and was akumatized because he tried to get a chance from his father.

It didn’t help at all that Plagg was voicing out his deep desire to actually enjoy a birthday party. The little god had a point. When was he ever going to get a chance at a party? When he was 18? That was way too far. Besides, there was no harm to the city, no one was actively in peril.

He could get to enjoy a few minutes, transform, trap the akuma and all would be good!

Adrien went back outside where his classmates were still dancing and decided to mingle in between. The music was swell and no one had to follow a dance routine, so that was already a bonus. But the more he moved around the more he saw the lack of energy in them, as if they weren’t into it.

Suddenly the music turned slower and couples were forming around him.

“Is it me or does everyone seem a bit weird?”

“Forget about them, let’s go dance!” Chloe pulled him to the dance floor, clinging to him as she swayed to the music.

Ladybug jumped to the source of commotion, Adrien’s front yard.

“Huh,” she observed the situation. There was the bubbler at a dj stand while her classmates and friend were slow dancing and, wait a minute, was that?

“What is that cat thinking?” she huffed as she saw Adrien dancing with Chloe. He was here the whole time? With the akuma so close? Marinette frowned when suddenly she saw Chloe leaning forward to kiss Adrien.

Something inside her churned, like if she had eaten something spoiled. She activated her lucky charm, a record falling in her hands. Ladybug looked around her, convoluting a plan to turn around the situation, a hyped music boosting out of the speakers to break everyone apart.

She smiled, only to jump away to a safe place once she heard the beeping from her earrings.

That was a bit too fast for her liking.

Marinette stretched her hands to catch Tikki, offering the small kwami a nervous smile.

“Marinette,” Tikki rubbed her head, throwing Marinette a stare.

“I…don’t know why I did that” Marinette looked back “but I needed to get his attention?”

“Sure, and jealously had nothing to do with it” Tikki crossed her arms.

“Je-jealously?” Marinette blinked “I was not jealous? Of who? Chloe?” Marinette rolled her eyes “what would I even be jealous of?”

Tikki refrained herself from rolling her eyes.

“But, akuma, he’s not going anywhere” Marinette smiled again “we’ll go in, get you some food to replenish and I’ll pull a certain stray cat’s ear to help out.”

She let Tikki back into her bag and sneaked into the party, right towards the snack table to stash some cookies, when she crossed sight with Adrien.

They stared at each other, Adrien smiling nervously as he pointed at the door, with Marinette sighing and following after him. They did need to transform to face the Bubbler after all.

“So, having fun?” Adrien asked once the door was closed.

“Oh I don’t know,” Marinette crossed her arms “what about you?”

Adrien’s shoulders sagged and Marinette couldn’t help but to feel bad. This was, akuma or not, something Adrien had always wanted to try. To have for himself. And yeah, the conditions of how he was having this party weren’t the most ideal but Marinette couldn’t take that away from him.

“I’m sorry Adrien,” she sighed “you deserve to have a party, especially today.”

“That’s what I said” Plagg poked out of Adrien’s shirt, only to be received by a scowl from Tikki “ah…”

“I am not surprised,” Tikki frowned more when a loud scream from outside made them turn to the window, Ivan getting thrown to the air in a green bubble.

“Oh no,” they said at the same time, looking at each other with decision.

“Tikki, spots on!”

“Plagg, claws out!”

They went out from different sides of the house to stop the Bubbler, only to be swallowed by one green one, with the usual litany of handling over their miraculous. The more the Bubbler talked the more Marinette got an idea of why Nino had been akumatized.

“They care for their kids, they love them!”

“Most adults do anyhow” Chat Noir mumbled, earning a soft glance from Ladybug “you must bring the adults back!”

“No, never” Bubbler grinned “know what? Since you care about these adults so much, why don’t you go float with them for a while?”

Next thing they knew; they were tossed high to the sky.

“Use your cataclysm!” Ladybug yelled as they went higher than the top of the Eiffel tower.

“Couldn’t you have said that 500 hundred feet ago?!” Chat Noir stared at her and summoned his magic. He didn’t think much as he slammed his cataclysm on the bubble, both dropping down way too fast for his pleasure.

“Your stick!” Ladybug yelled as she pointed at the Eiffel Tower, the wheels in Chat Noir’s mind running to catch on her plan. It was ingenious!

He threw it hard, the baton slamming into the tower with force. Ladybug grabbed his hand and threw her yo-yo at it, the string twisting around it to create a vaulting pole for them to swing and land on the street.

“Good thing cats aren’t afraid of heights” he smiled just as his ring beeped and Ladybug threw him back the baton “what’s the plan bug?”

“His bubble sort she frowned “that’s got to be where the akuma is”

“Then we better hurry” he nodded and ran back to his home, Ladybug right next to him.

They ran and jumped to the top of Adrien’s gate way where Bubbler was just about to trap the rest of their classmates, when Ladybug called out for his attention.

“Sorry to burst your bubble!”

Chat Noir tried to contain his snort. And to think his partner didn’t like his puns.

They knew how to deal with this now. Even with Bubbler trapping their classmates, Chat Noir knew they were going to save them. The fought drove them to the tower (Chat was not going to comment on how often that was getting to be), when his ring beeped again.

“Lucky charm!” Ladybug shouted as a big wrench fell on her hands.

“Your plumbing skills going to help us out?!” Chat smiled, only to jump away from an exploding bubble. That was fine, he thought, he could act as bait while Ladybug thought of something. He jumped high up the tower, climbing and jumping as more bubbles exploded behind him.

He smiled when he saw Ladybug finally ran towards the ventilation vent, the tube going loose as air started to ran out of it. Chat jumped towards it and clung to it, redirecting the air to blow the bubbles away just as Ladybug caught the bubble sort to break it, the purple butterfly caught in her yo-yo to be purified.

“Pound it!” they fist bumped after the Cure swam around them. Ladybug offered to take Nino back to ground since she still had a minute or two to spare.

“See you tonight for patrol!”

Adrien smiled. At least there was some good things coming for him this day.

He kept on that promise even after he had a lonesome dinner, only to be surprised by Nathalie giving him a present from his father.

“T-thank you!” he couldn’t help but to smile as he unwrapped it, revealing a soft cerulean scarf that felt warm to the touch.

It was nice, comfortable, and as Adrien looked closer it was finely done. He smiled as he wrapped it around his neck.

Adrien kept on waiting until night where he jumped out of the window, cladded in his suit. He had to leave the scarf at home, didn’t want to cause any suspicions to anyone who saw him that night, but when he arrived to their usual spot –a rooftop of an abandoned building- he was surprised to what he saw.

There was Ladybug, finishing with setting up some fairy lights around what seemed to be a tent made out of old blankets. The inside had a few cushions and pillows splayed over a plastic tarp, with a few bowls filled with popcorn, pretzels and cookies, with a couple of thermos right next to them.

“What…”

“Happy birthday!” she clapped her hands together “I know this is not like a big party but I figured you still needed a small celebration, maybe next year we will have a better plan to convince your dad-”

His heart swelled up in his chest. To think she had gone through the trouble of making all of this for him.

“He…actually gave me a gift” Chat said “a scarf, can’t you believe it? He didn’t give me a lame pen.”

Chat looked at her expression and frowned but she was back to smiling that he maybe misread what he had seen.

“That’s wonderful Chat!” she sat on one cushion and patted the one next to him, Chat Noir almost tripping on his feet as he joined her “I’m so glad you liked his present.”

“Thank you,” he wiped his eyes “but this! This is so great bug.”

“Well, you deserve it” Ladybug smiled at him “So! I have some of your favorite anime here to watch,” she pulled out a flash drive and her laptop “or we could watch a movie? Or we could just dance too, whatever you pick.”

“Are you finally going to succumb to watch Sailor Moon with me?”

“Only because it is your birthday,”

Chat laughed and waited for her to start running the first episode, sneaking out a pretzel to nibble on.

Despite everything, this was a good birthday to remember.

[this-is-rina]

Just “Networking”|| Noah Centineo Imagine

Hi everyone!  It’s been a very long time since I wrote on Tumblr and my first time writing on this blog. The last time I wrote on a personal blog was for One Direction when I was in high school (Ack!).  I did not like posting my writing to my personal and made many blogs for my writing (I wonder how many of you will recognize my style :O)  I vowed I would never write on a personal blog again...then I saw a few interviews with Noah Centineo. He has such an interesting personality for an actor and I was inspired to write a story about him. 

It’s gonna be a long one, so I’ll put it under a read more for all my fellow silent scrollers.  However, I’ll leave the synopsis up top so you know if you’re interested!

~Rina xoxo

Plot:  You are an aspiring screenwriter who currently manages a computer repair store in Hollywood with your stepbrother, Xavier, an aspiring composer.  By chance, you meet Noah Centineo in a coffee shop.  Not recognizing him at first, you think nothing about your acquaintance, until Xavier realizes that Noah could be both of your tickets to fame. Suddenly, your writing has a real chance, and that appeals to you, just a much as getting an adorable and kind boyfriend in Noah. However, you highly doubts Noah would agree.  But, what if he doesn’t know? 

You were running late...which was kind of the usual lately.  Ever since you moved out of your brother’s apartment, you had yet to come to work on time.  Xavier, who was technically your stepbrother, but you only made the distinction when you did not want to be associated with him, used it as proof that you couldn’t take care of yourself. However, you both knew that you were one of the most responsible people either of you knew, as long as you followed the schedule you programmed in your phone.

You dashed through the double doors of the computer repair shop, panting.  Xavier shook his head with a “Tsk, tsk, tsk,” as he watched you stash your stuff in the back and run behind the counter.

“You know you’re late, right?” Xavier emphasized. “So, you know what that means...”

“Oh come on!” You complained, smoothing your hair to make it more into your usual style.  “You totally came in early because you know I’m still getting used to the commute.”

“And?” Xavier questioned, “A deal is a deal, kiddo. The last person in buys everyone coffee.”

“Ugh, you only came up with that rule to spite me for moving out.” You complained.  “We should not even be wasting money on coffee when we could just make it at home.”

“Don’t forget my whip,” Xavier said as he tended to a fried PC.  That was your signal that the conversation was over.

“That’s not healthy...” You muttered as you went into the back room to fish out your wallet.  “What would your mother say?”

“That you should be on time to work!” He retorted and you rolled your eyes as you walked to the coffee shop across the street.

You and Xavier were pretty close, when you weren’t fighting over lateness.  Your dad married his mom when you were both around 13 years of age.  Both of you lost a parent young, and were only children until meeting each other. Your Brady Bunch family came together well, and you two grew closely together.  

Xavier was the first to decide he wanted to do showbiz.  He would practice piano and guitar daily, writing new tunes for his performance at the local bookstore talent show ever week.  You were more quiet about your aspirations as a writer, but he broke you out of your shell after college.  While you both studied computer science, you both also also concentrated in your passions, English Language and Music respectively.  You both moved to LA and through a series of lucky breaks and connections were able to manage a computer repair shop.  You hoped that by being in Hollywood you could hone your craft and make your dreams come true.

For now, you settled for fixing broken computers and fetching your brother’s coffee. At least you could buy a chai for yourself to relax too.

When you got to the coffee shop, it was clear that you missed the early morning rush.  You walked straight to the menu next to a guy who was several heads taller than you.  He had long, unruly brown hair, a scruffy beard and wore the baggiest t-shirt with the tightest jeans.  He glanced at you, feeling your presence and he gave you a gorgeous smile.  You gave him a coy smile back, trying not to fall for his chocolate-y brown orbs.  You cleared your throat and looked at the menu.

There was someone ahead of him who was taking awhile to order, and you could see him stealing glances at you from the corner of your eye.  You were definitely flattered.  This guy was pretty cute.  With his tan skin and athletic frame, he looked like that lovable sweetheart who would skate to your house just because he was in the neighborhood.  Whenever you would look in his direction, he always pretended to look away.  However, he would do it in an obvious manner.  He would look you directly in your eyes and then look at the ceiling, and then back to your eyes and then down at the floor. Back and forth his eyes and neck would move in this circular motion until he got a laugh out of you.

“Finally!” He cheered as you laughed, causing you to laugh more.  “I really wanted to make you laugh.  Have a great day, beautiful.” He flashed you a bright smile and then stepped up to make his order.

You couldn’t help, but blush.  It was always nice to be acknowledged by a cute guy.  You wished he stayed longer to make a move.  He finished his order and didn’t look back as he picked up his coffee from the counter.  You were bummed he did not have to wait for his drink, as you hoped you could chat some more, but settled for your bit of luck that he even noticed you.

“Hi,” You said with a smile to the cashier.  “Can I get a small chai and a medium iced mocha latte with extra whip and caramel drizzle?”

The cashier smiled.  “Is this for Xavier?” It was embarrassing how much your brother frequented this place.

You laughed, “Yup. I was late again!”  You snapped your fingers and wagged your fist, pretending to be upset.  You handed the cashier your card and he shook his head.

“That guy ahead of you paid for your order.  He had me write down his name and telephone number for you to reach out.” The cashier pulled out a slip of paper and your jaw dropped.

Noah

213-xxx-xxxx

“Wow, okay.” You weren’t sure what to say. This only happened in movies.  You made a mental note to add this to your list of romantic gestures for your next romcom screenplay.  You slipped the note into your wallet and closed it to put it back in your bag. You took the drinks and sauntered happily back to the repair shop.

Xavier was running a scan on another computer when you walked in.  You handed him his drink as you sipped yours happily.  He narrowed his eyes at you,

“Why are you humming?” He rolled his eyes. “You didn’t spit in this, right?’

“Gosh!” You huffed.  “Can’t a girl be happy and not be judged?”

“Any other girl, of course. You, no way!” Xavier laughed, “You’re always in a crappy mood when you lose bets.  Why is today any different?”

“A really cute guy bought our drinks!” You cooed.  “And he left his phone number.”

“Oh my god!” Xavier imitated your high pitch voice. Then his voice dropped back to a disinterested tone as he added, “Well that’s great, I hope he can pay for both of our rent too.”

“Why can’t you just be happy for me?” You sighed.  “I’m going to text him.”

Xavier shrugged as he focused on removing the hard drive of the computer. “Do what you want...”

You pondered what to text him and then smiled to yourself as you wrote your message.

Y/N: Hey, this is Y/N from the coffee shop.  Thanks for the free drinks! I hope to repay the favor some time soon.

It wasn’t much longer before you received a reply.

Noah: Hey, Y/N! Gorgeous name, by the way ;) Absolutely! How about tomorrow afternoon, let’s get a coffee after work?

Y/N: Works for me! 

You continued to text lightly throughout the day.  It was clear that you both had busy schedules, but you would try to continue the conversation as much as you could during breaks.  You were pleased to see how friendly and genuine he seemed.  You were impressed by his passion for acting, and relayed your love of writing.  He was supportive and encouraged you to try to get published.  You were too shy to admit that was the goal, and instead insisted that he was being too kind.

“Have you been texting that guy all day?” Xavier asked as he closed up shop.

“Yeah,” You said absentmindedly as you read the article Noah just sent you. 

“Well, make sure he’s not a serial killer.” He warned.  “Have you googled the guy?”

“I will when I go home, just chill, okay?” You shrugged it off, but you were moderately concerned.  This guy was kind, charming and a great listener. He was either perfect for you or an ax murderer...hopefully not both.

The next day, you met Noah for coffee dressed in your favorite outfit.  You waved at him as he walked in and he gave you the widest grin.  You had been texting all night and up until this morning, so when he pulled you into an embrace, it felt natural.

“Get whatever you like!” You offered.

“I’ll probably just get my usual coffee and maybe some sweets to share?” Noah smiled, “Since I only paid for drinks, I’ll contribute to the sweets as well.”

“No!” You insisted.  “My brother’s drink was also covered, so I think it is only fair.”

You argued about it for awhile until it was decided that he would buy one sweet and you would buy another and the two drinks. You tried to ignore the fact that the one sweet he bought was the same price as the two drinks combined.

“So, this is going to be really dumb...” You warned, “But I never did get your last name...”

“Oh,” Noah chuckled.  “It’s Centineo. Yours?”

“Y/L/N...” You responded as you sent the text to your brother.  Just in case he was going to kill you, you wanted Xavier to trace it back.  You were pretty sure you spelled his name wrong, but you hoped it would be enough.  You put your phone in your bag and then gave him a smile.

“Now that we have been formally introduced, let’s eat!” You said, picking up a fork and digging into the mini-cheesecake first.

You two exchanged ideas on your favorite books, popular films, and making it in Hollywood.  You were surprised at how much Noah knew about showbiz.  He said he was on a few tv shows and in a couple movies, but you did not expect him to be so wise.  It made you a bit self conscious.  You had just been working on scripts in your downtime.  Maybe you should get training by going to workshops...

“Oh man, you seem sad.” Noah pouted.  “What did I say?”

“Ah, no.” You shook your head.  “It’s not you! I just feel a little overwhelmed, maybe? You just seem so together. I’m just starting out.”

“I mean, I’m only 22.” Noah laughed.  “I’m still learning too.”

You grunted as you sipped your chai.  He was a bit younger than you. It was less than a year, but still, you felt envious.

“However...” Noah bit his lip.  “...you’re quite a distraction for me.  I realize that if I don’t get my daily dose of Y/N, I may lose track of my goals permanently.”

You coughed to hide your snort of laughter.  “Is this your way of saying you want to hang out more?”

“Absolutely.” Noah grinned at you and you returned it.  “I’m going to this pool party on Saturday.  Would you like to come? You can bring your brother and a few friends...”

“Sure,” You nodded.  “There’s a few dudes and dudettes that work part-time at the shop.  If it’s after hours, I can bring them too.”

“Yeah, it starts at like 8pm and goes to like 5 in the morning.  It’s supposed to be a dance party slash pool party slash cocktail extravaganza.” Noah laughed.  “Plus, I heard a few really cool people might be there like the cast of my last film.  It would be great to introduce you.”

“Are you sure you want a girl like me on your arm?” You teased.  

“I wouldn’t want anyone else...” Noah leaned over, lifted your hand and kissed it.

You could feel yourself swooning and knew in an instant that he were falling for him.

When you returned to the store, you were greeted by a very excited Xavier. He was almost ready to jump up and down when you entered the store.  You made a weird face as you waited for him to explain.

“That Noah guy recently got mega famous.  He was cast in two Netflix films and is basically the white hottie of Instagram.”

“Oh wow,” You nodded to yourself. “No wonder he’s so knowledgeable.”

“Y/N, don’t you know what this means?” Xavier looked like he wanted to scream.  “If you get with this guy, we’ll be in the in-crowd! This will be our big break.”

“Woah, woah, woah.” You said quickly.  “That sounds like I’m using him.  Xav, he’s a great guy. I really like him.”

“Do you not want to be published? Recognized? Rewarded? Think about the looks on our parents faces when they see that sending us to Hollywood was not for naught.” Xavier used hand gestures to show the grandiosity of his ideas.

You made a deep sigh.  “Of course, I do! I just...I really like him.”

“Even better,” Xavier said with a smile as he put his arm around you.  “Then you’re just networking...that’s all.”

“Networking...not using...is that what you’re saying?” You repeated it to yourself. “I guess...”

“That’s my girl!” Xavier snapped his fingers happily.  “Now, when do we meet him...”

You hesitated to tell him about the party on Saturday.  However, the more you thought about it, the less worried you felt.  You did have feelings for Noah, it did not hurt to take advantage of his connections.

Noah met you, Xavier and one of your other co-workers, Andrea, outside. He was in baggy swim trunks that were low enough to show his chiseled hips and impressive core.  You tried not to drool, suddenly feeling a little embarrassed by your monokini under your see-through cover up.  Noah greeted you warmly, putting an arm around you.

“Hello kiss?” He asked sweetly, making you smile.

You extended your cheek in response and he gave you a light peck.  Then he turned to your group as you introduced them.  You walked into the party, and started to see the familiar faces of the cast of To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before. After Xavier told you Noah was famous, you decided to look him up, and the guest list of the party was like all of the related actors on Noah’s Google Search.

He introduced you to Lana and her boyfriend first and you were in awe of her beauty.  She was so down-to-earth, but she also had this respectable air about her.  You pointed out your brother and Andrea for her to meet as Noah pulled you to meet the rest of his friends and co-workers.

At one point, Noah pulls you to the bar and offers to get you a drink.  You pick something light, deciding not to get sloppy drunk in front of the guy you liked. He got a beer and you both turned to watch the party.  You were a bit away from the speakers which allowed you to talk a bit more. 

Suddenly, Noah pulls out his phone and reads a text message that makes his brows furrow.  He excuses himself and runs over to Lana.  She clearly looked upset and was gesturing towards you and also towards Xavier and Andrea.

Oh no... You thought as you pulled out your phone and texted Xavier.

Y/N: Tell me you didn’t do something stupid!!!!!

Xavier:  Nope! I was just talking to Lana about my music....

Y/N: She looks pissed.  You didn’t ask her for anything, right?

Xavier: Oh man...I had a few shots and I think I might have mentioned how glad I was that you’re dating up by dating Noah...

Y/N: WHAT?!

Before you could chastise Xavier further, Noah and Lana walked up to you.  

Lana spoke first.

“Can I just say I’m really disappointed?  You seem like such a nice girl, but clearly if you and your brother and his friend are here to use Noah, you are not as nice as you seem...” Lana’s lips were tight with anger.

“Stepbrother...” You said sheepishly.  “Look, I’m not proud of what Xavier said, but he means well.”

“Does he?” Lana asked. “Does he know what it’s like to grind and hope and work and pray for an opportunity only to have people try to attain the same success on your coat tails? It’s one thing to come to a function like this for that, but to toy with Noah’s heart...that is unforgivable.”

“Lana, you have every right to be upset. I’m sorry.” You looked at Noah who was looking at you sadly this whole time. “Noah, can we talk, please?”

He nodded and you apologized to Lana again before he pulled you inside of the house that was hosting the party.  He pulled you into a small bedroom after a few failed attempts at finding your own space. Clearly, the house was meant for hooking up not break-up-before-you-even-started-chats. At this point, you were crying and once you were inside the room, you struggled to compose yourself

“Noah...” You exhaled a shaky breath.  “I swear, when I contacted you I had no idea who you were.  When we talked all this week, through text and on the phone and on our dates, I was not trying to use you.  Even after I knew you were famous, I was convinced that if I really liked you, then it wouldn’t be a problem if Xavier and I tried to network.  Although it was Xavier who planted the idea in my head I need to own up to it and--”

Noah lurched forward and hugged you tightly.  You were so shocked and overwhelmed that you began to weep. He rubbed your back as you let it out before he stepped back.

“I know.” Noah nodded.  “Lana means well.  She knows how much I like you and really doesn’t want me to get hurt.  At the same time, she knows that I’m not an idiot.  If I tell her that I trust you, then she will trust you too.”

“You believe me?” You asked with a sniffle.

“Of course, Y/N.  Look, I can tell that you’re into me.  I’m into you too and I want us to continue to date.” Noah smiled, “And for the record, I am happy to support your and your brother’s dreams.  Just be honest with me! I’ll read your scripts, and if I think they are good, which I am sure they are, I’ll connect you with some people who maybe interested. Hell, I might even audition for a role or two if you’ll have me...”

“I’d love that!” You said excitedly.  “But even if you don’t do that...I want to work hard in my own right to earn being by your side.”

“You are already too good to stand by my side.” Noah grinned.  “Let’s grow together, okay?”

“Okay...” You leaned in and looked at him with sultry eyes.  “So, uh, since we’re in this private room...”

“Yeah?” Noah asked, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you close.

“Well, I guess that was technically our first fight so we need to make up, right?” You suggested.

“I like where this is going.” Noah smirked.

“Then kiss me.” You said as your lips were almost at his lips.  

And he did.  He lifted you in his arms and kissed you like his life depended on it. You would reprimand Xavier and make it up to Lana later...right now, all you could think about was Noah and his soft kisses.

Fin

[c-offeeandcocoa]

Life Update: Winter Break

I’m back in Cambridge now for Lent term (ack), and since I really have to get down to work tomorrow (double ack), I figured the time is ripe for a little reflection/life update! Below the cut:

- Went to Delhi for my aunt’s wedding. I finally got to experience an Indian wedding, and it was truly amazing - a whirlwind of colours, alcohol, laughter, culture and overwhelming, heartwarming togetherness. My family’s really spread out across India + the world, and this was pretty much the first time that we’ve all really gathered in one place, so it was great to be able to bond with my (second) cousins and the aunts/uncles* i rarely see.

- Wrote 1/3 of my dissertation and made arrangements to visit nurseries for data collection. Before the vacations, things were really up in the air dissertation-wise, but now it feels like we’re actually making some headway, and I’m really excited to get started on the research. I’ve learned so much already (ie. how to code children’s free play behaviour)! 

- Wrote my first essay of term! I’ve never actually written an essay over winter break lol but my schedule is such this term that i’ve got quite a few essays + dissertation stuff packed into the first few weeks, so I thought it was a good idea to get ahead. The intro still isn’t finished because i got fed up, but two sentences about why studying divorce is important and I’ll be good to go.

- Got back into making moodboards and started to post on instagram more. Moodboards were my main way of sort of developing my visual taste back in the summer, so it was good to get back into making them and exercising my creative eye. Instagram’s linked to the fact that I wanted to learn to take better photos and thus, I just started posting more. Insta is hard though - like serious props to proper ‘grammers. Making everything fit together and look coherent, but still eclectic is near impossible, but i’m determined not to give up - even if my mum does get irritated with me constantly taking pictures of my food. Tip: tell her it’s so you can ‘remember your last year of uni’ and ‘have something to get nostalgic about’, and then point out that your dad is also on his phone (although he’s answering work emails, not taking photos). It helps. Somewhat. 

*psa: i only have one actual uncle on my mum’s side, but my mum’s really close with her cousins, so they’re like my aunts/uncles. 

[anamorales]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!

Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!

WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.

Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!

I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.

And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)

Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things

Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.

Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:

Get an early win

Quick hygiene fix

Watch a 5-minute motivational video

Do the 10-10-10 Protocol

Do the Very Next Thing

Breathe, idiot!

Consume less, produce more

Ask for help

Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!

You can do this!

I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!

Leave a comment below!

-Steve

PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!

I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.

Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at contact@nerdfitness.com!

PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck. published first on https://immigrationways.tumblr.com/

[lindafrancois]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. To salsa music. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!

Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!

WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.

Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!

I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.

And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)

Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things

Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.

Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:

Get an early win

Quick hygiene fix

Watch a 5-minute motivational video

Do the 10-10-10 Protocol

Do the Very Next Thing

Breathe, idiot!

Consume less, produce more

Ask for help

Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!

You can do this!

I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!

Leave a comment below!

-Steve

PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!

I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.

Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at contact@nerdfitness.com!

PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck. published first on https://dietariouspage.tumblr.com/

[almajonesnjna]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..

https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u

[joshuabradleyn]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..

https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u

[johnclapperne]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..

https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u

[albertcaldwellne]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide..

https://ift.tt/2GBwV7u

[kiaradnoblesus]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. To salsa music. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!

Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!

WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.

Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!

I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.

And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)

Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things

Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.

Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:

Get an early win

Quick hygiene fix

Watch a 5-minute motivational video

Do the 10-10-10 Protocol

Do the Very Next Thing

Breathe, idiot!

Consume less, produce more

Ask for help

Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!

You can do this!

I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!

Leave a comment below!

-Steve

PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!

I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.

Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at contact@nerdfitness.com!

PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.

from Fitness News By James https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/overwhelmed-anxious-how-to-get-unstuck/

[fitnetpro]

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck.

“Why is my eye twitching?!”

It’s 5:45AM, and I’m lying in bed with my eyes closed. I’m exhausted because I managed to have one of my recurring nightmares the previous night where I dreamed my bed was covered in spiders—this happens once every few months, especially when I’m overtired.

It’s real enough to me that about 50% of the time I actually jump out of bed and run into the other room.

And yet, despite being sleep deprived, there’s no WAY I can go back to bed either. Because I have far too much on my mind. It looks something like this:

“ACK! I was supposed to call the dermatologist yesterday to schedule an appointment—it’s been on my to-do list for 10 days weighing me down and yet I can’t get myself to pick up the phone. Why am I so averse to talking to a human on a telephone? Just do it, idiot! Call them today at 9AM.

“Why the hell did I dream about spiders again last night? I have to write thousands of words today. And I have that awkward meeting planned stressing me out. OH **** I forgot to send my mom a mother’s day card! I did send her flowers. Is that enough? She loves cards. Can I express ship one in time? AHHHHH!

“Is that networking event I agreed to tonight or tomorrow night? Why did Past Steve commit Future Steve to that? I hate that guy! Wait, is today Wednesday? Sonofa, today is a training day at the gym too. Good luck finding time for that. Oh GOOD, I’m out of clean underwear. And the fridge is empty. And how do I have a pimple inside my nose? I would like to curl up into the fetal position and opt-out of all responsibilities today.”

They say depression is worrying about the past, while anxiety is worrying about the future.

Like many who read this site, I’m quite good at both of those things!

Even though I’m generally a happy person with a very positive outlook on life, life can get overwhelming at times and my brain likes to take over and shut everything down.

What the inside of my brain looks like: take my crazy stream of conscious above and read it in the style of slam poetry, while a Tasmanian devil plays the bongos with no discernible rhythm in the background. He then eats the bongo and starts Irish step dancing. Out of rhythm. While setting off fireworks.

The days where this happens are shitty.

And many shitty days in a row only seem to compound the problem.

I can get so overwhelmed that I can’t seem to make any progress on anything, and yet I know making progress on stuff is the fastest path for me to escape this maniacal prison my brain has trapped me in!

I am a logical, rational, scientific person, which means thinking through this logically, rationally, and scientifically makes sense to me.

And yet in those moments, emotions sit in the command chair and start calling the shots.

At this point, you are either nodding your head going “Steve, WTF are you talking about?” orrrrrr ”OMG I totally know what that feels like.”

I’ve been running Nerd Fitness for close to 10 years now. I’ve seen and heard it all, and been through some shit.

In that time, I’ve come to a few universal truths:

“Busy” and “overwhelm” are serious problems that don’t go away without a plan to tackle them. Having a Strategy Guide to deal with these scenarios can be huge.

Knowing that, I’ve created a personal checklist (yes, a real checklist) for myself of things I can do when I can’t seem to get out of my own head.

These ideas help me break through overwhelm—and get back to a more natural state where I can start making progress on tackling what I need to for the day.

And today, I want to share that personal checklist with you!

#1) GET AN EARLY WIN

For me, the best early win? Making my bed.

When I’m stuck in a rut, lying in bed, and faced with a daunting day ahead of me, I try to give myself a quick momentum-building win to start the day.

I learned this philosophy from William H. McRaven, retired US Navy Admiral and author of the book Make Your Bed: how you do the little things will impact how you do the big things. And by starting with a simple little thing, it can help me build momentum and show myself that I do have control and can affect the outcome of things.

Sure, I don’t make my bed with military precision (sorry Admiral!)—I simply pull the covers up as neatly as I can, I put the pillows on the bed and make sure it looks presentable. This takes less than 2 minutes and gives me a quick win before I’ve even left the room.

WHY IT WORKS: “Look, you already did a thing today. Today can be different. What’s next?” It’s an instant, quick, gratifying win that is the first action meant to build momentum.

Note: Comically, this is often the suggestion I get the most vitriol or controversy for. I’m going to ignore the argument of “this makes it easier for bed bugs Steve” or “I read that creative geniuses have messy beds and I’m unique and blah blah blah” or “nobody else sees my bed; why should I waste valuable time making it?” or “I get up early and my spouse is still asleep and thus I cannot make my bed.”

Okay, that last one is totally valid. I hear ya!

If you are vehemently opposed to making your bed (or there is a person still asleep in it!), pick another thing like cleaning up your room, cleaning out the sink, cleaning off your kitchen table, etc. as soon as you wake up to give yourself an early win. OR, just make your bed, take the win, and move on!

#2) QUICK HYGIENE FIX

At this point, I’ve already started off my day with a win in the bedroom.

Wait, that came out wrong.

Next up: self-care! This term is hot these days, like “bitcoin” and “avocado toast.”

But I’ll be damned if it’s not an actually important thing that falls by the wayside when life gets busy. And I imagine if you’re a mom or a dad, you have plenty of other people to care for, and caring for yourself is often at the bottom of the list.

And yet, a little bit of work can go a long way.

Although I work from a home office and often type these articles without pants on (too much? cool), I still find it to be incredibly valuable if I treat myself like an actual adult:

So I take a shower. I shave my face. I put on moisturizer that makes me smell like I have my act together. I actually comb my hair.

Oh, and the big one:

I floss.

Yes, I know you’re supposed to floss every day. I do not floss every day. As the late comedian Mitch Hedberg once said, “It’s as hard [to quit smoking] as it is to START flossing.”

RIP Mitch.

But I’ll be damned if my teeth don’t feel great after a good floss. For whatever reason, flossing is something that I avoid, until I actually do it and realize “that wasn’t so bad, I’m glad I did that, I feel better.”

I like to think this primes my brain to tackle other undesirable tasks later on in the day. Flossing wasn’t bad, and I’m glad I did it. What about that other task I’ve been avoiding? I bet it’s not as bad as my dumb brain has built it up to be.

That first tooth is always the hardest, but once I do one, I know it’s all downhill from there to do the rest of them.

WHY IT WORKS: They say dress for the role you want, not the one you have. And I don’t currently have a spacesuit. So I’m stuck with dressing like a more grown-up, put-together version of me. When I’m showered, shaved, shampooed, conditioned, and flossed, I just feel like a better human being worthy of some compassion and also a guy that can get things done.

Plus, I know flossing will avoid my nightmare scenario laid out here.

#3) WATCH A MOTIVATING YOUTUBE VIDEO

I have a love-hate relationship with motivation.

Mostly hate.

Motivation is a consistently flaky friend that shows up when things are good and abandons me when I need it most.

So I don’t let myself be victim to the ebbs and flows of motivation. Instead, I make motivation work for me, and use it to strategically get me out of my own way and back on track.

It’s a video I can put on that takes 5 minutes or less that makes me want to run through a brick wall. In lieu of a brick wall being readily available, it inspires me to start actually getting things done and getting closer to my goals.

So before I do any of the next steps, I often put on this SINGLE VIDEO:

WHY IT WORKS: Motivation is a real thing. And when timed correctly, it can really help me get unstuck and get the ball rolling on a project or a good pump-up talk before hitting the gym. What I don’t do is force myself to watch 40 motivational videos and run out of time to exercise. This is neither productive nor helpful. And I know motivation wanes, so I use the motivation strategically to set myself up so that I don’t need motivation later.

Side note: please don’t get lost down a youtube rabbit hole—that’s how you end up watching 15 videos about baby goats. Not that this just happened to me. Have your go-to video that you watch and reminds you that you can get stuff done, and then go do it.

#4) DO THE 10-10-10 PROTOCOL

When life gets too busy, exercise is often the first thing to get thrown by the wayside. And I know that when I can’t get a workout in, I tend to eat like an idiot too, which makes things even worse.

Which means when I’m overwhelmed and need a reminder that I’m a work in progress trying to level up my life, I do the 10-10-Protocol.

Why is it a Protocol and not a Workout? Because I’m the one writing, and I decided “protocol” made it sound way cooler and possibly makes it connected to espionage or Batman.

So what is the 10-10-10 Protocol?

Think of it like a system reboot for your body and brain:

10 push-ups

10 lunges

10-minute walk

I’m a big fan of the mentality: “do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” (Thanks, Teddy Roosevelt). And this protocol will allow you to diffuse bombs and apprehend fugitives snap out of a funk with a clear head and remind all the muscles in your body: “We’re doing fitness things today!”

This is a workout that can be done no matter what you’re wearing. It can be done in your cubicle. It can be done in a house with a mouse. Or in a box with a fox.

WHY THIS WORKS: The 10-10-10 gets the blood circulating. It gets my muscle fibers firing. It gets my brain working. And that 10 minute walk can really clear my head. It allows me to get out of my head, stop worrying about the past and the future, and just focus on what I can do TODAY.

Unsurprisingly, I get my best ideas walking around, NOT sitting at my desk. And I know I’m not alone on that—this is borrowed from Steve Jobs, who held walking meetings instead of “sit in conference room” meetings.

If you want to stop reading right now and initiate the 10-10-10 Protocol yourself, go for it.

#5) DO THE VERY NEXT THING

There’s nothing more frustrating than feeling so overwhelmed at all of the things that I’m trying to do and not being able to get anything done.

It makes me want to curl up into the fetal position on the ground and hide from my responsibilities. Or play victim and lament the fact that I have so much to do. Or complain that life is so busy.

I do all of those things for about 30 seconds. And then I realize:

Busy is a choice.

It might not be my fault, but it is my responsibility.

And then I do three things:

Get mad at Past Steve for saying yes to so many things.

Make a note to start saying no to way more stuff to protect Future Steve.

Write down on paper all of the crap I have to do.

Sometimes if I feel like I could use a win, I put “make my bed,” “floss,” and “10-10-10 Protocol” at the top of the list and then immediately cross them off.

Progress and momentum for the win!

Next, I try to number these things in order of importance if possible. I ask, “Which of these things can I do today that will actually make an impact on my life?”

Then, I ask: “Okay, I now have my most important priority. What’s the very next step I need to take on this particular item? Good. Now shut the hell up and do that thing.”

As you can tell, I have to have conversations with myself like I’m a 5-year-old.

WHY THIS WORKS: When we get overwhelmed, it’s because our brains like to make Misty Mountains out of molehills. The “stuff” we have to do is nebulous, opaque, and scary. Until it gets broken down into steps.

And then it’s not so daunting. And once you can start to cross a thing or two off the list, or make meaningful progress on a project or activity, you come to the realization I come to every single time: I do have the time to do things. I need to say no to more things, I need to manage my time better, and the sooner I can get out of my head the faster I can be DONE.

No joke: halfway through writing this article I finally called the dermatologist, and timed how long the process took.

It took 2 freakin’ minutes.

This is something that had been on my to-do list weighing on me for the past 10 days, and it took me 2 minutes to schedule the damn appointment!

#6) BREATHE, IDIOT!

The past: I can’t change it!

The future: It hasn’t happened yet!

Today is a pretty good day. And yet, I have NO problem spending all of my time worrying about tomorrow.

This is suboptimal.

So I force myself to “breathe, idiot!”

(Before you get offended at my self-talk here, I mean “idiot” in a joking, loving manner to remind myself that I’m probably overcomplicating things to the point of paralysis and I need to just slow way down. Feel free to use the term “nerf herder or “cotton-headed ninny muggins” instead.)

Cool? Cool.

5 minutes. I just sit there and focus on breathing. In, out. In, out. You get the point.

I’ve tried meditating for 20 minutes a day and kept it up for 60 days (I used Headspace, and I’m also a big fan of Calm). It was like herding cats, and it didn’t unlock the secrets of the cosmos. I did enjoy the Cosmos miniseries on Fox, but that doesn’t apply here.

But just taking 5 minutes to breathe can help me slowwwww way down and just get back to work.

WHY THIS WORKS: I find big time value in reminding myself to breathe and just focus on the day I’m living. 5 minutes is enough for me to settle down and then I can go back to #5 (work on the very next step) of a project without being overwhelmed.

#7) CONSUME LESS, PRODUCE MORE

Whenever I’m overwhelmed and feeling crappy, a look back at my previous week will always reveal one constant:

I consumed more than I created.

For starters, from a pure health perspective, when I consume more than I produce—meaning I eat more calories than I burn—it’s going to result in weight gain.

The whole reason we have survived as a species is due to us producing more than we consume! Saving for a rainy day, thinking beyond just TODAY, growing more crops to share with society, etc.

So let’s get back to this concept of too much consumption.

I look back at how much time I’ve been spending consuming:

Television

Video games

Social media

Outrage news stories

Takeout

Books

In each of these instances, I’m an innocent bystander. Sure, video games are an active activity, but they can take over one’s life and contribute to overwhelm (I see you Fortnite), so I’ll put gaming in the “consumption” category.

If I’m overwhelmed, to borrow from Nate Green (who calls it “Nuclear Mode”), I recognize the things that are contributing to my overwhelm, especially the stuff that I can’t control—I see you political outrage on Facebook—and GET IT OUT OF MY LIFE.

I already don’t have any social media apps on my phone. I then use Freedom.to to block certain websites for the ENTIRE day. No more mindlessly scrolling Facebook or Instagram. No tinfoil hat theories on Zero Hedge.

JUST GET THE STUFF DONE I NEED TO GET DONE.

And that means less consumption, more production and creation!

Writing and creating content, like this article

Playing music (violin, piano, guitar)

Cooking my own meal at home

Creating art, doodling, drawing

Creating conversation with friends

WHY THIS WORKS: Creating makes me happy, and it makes most humans happy. And yet, our default behavior is to consume because consuming is so much easier. So I remove the temptation of consumption by blocking sites and deleting apps, and emphasize creation—even if it’s just for a few minutes.

Who cares if what you create isn’t worthy of being recorded or published or hung in a museum. It’s not the end result, it’s the activity itself!

#8) ASK FOR HELP, TALK IT OUT

When I get stuck in my own head, it’s easy to feel like Chris in Get Out: trapped alone, swimming in a bottomless pit of nothingness. Eeesh, that was dark, Steve.

It’s ALSO easy to tell myself: “Suck it up, Kamb! Other people would kill to be in your position! They have it WAY worse!”

And I have to remind myself that everybody is dealing with their own stuff, and just because others have problems doesn’t mean I can’t be allowed to deal with mine!

So I ask for help. Depending on what I’m struggling with, I’m not afraid to ask for help:

I might reach out to my dad or mentors for business advice.

I might call my mom just to tell her I miss her (moms love this).

I might text my online fitness coach to ask about how I can scale or change my workout schedule.

I might schedule a therapy session to help me manage all of this stuff!

I might reach out to a friend for relationship or friendship advice.

I avoided therapy for years until my friend Lindsay once told me: “Steve, fit people still go to the gym to exercise. There’s no shame in going to exercise your mind.”

We’ve written an ENTIRE article on a Beginner’s Guide to Mental Health, and if this is something you’re interested in please consider it!

Note: if you really struggle with depression/anxiety, speaking with a mental health professional could be a game-changing experience. Please do so as soon as you can!

WHY THIS WORKS: I used to be afraid to ask for help, assuming I had to know all the answers on my own. Or that people relied on me to be the happy-go-lucky person and I wasn’t allowed to be unhappy or stressed. And then I grew up.

Now I have no problem asking for help, saying “I don’t know” even if it makes me feel foolish, and I get to a solution MUCH faster!

I know with everything being online these days, it’s easy to spend a lot of time being friendly but not having actual deep conversations with people. This is something I have to work really hard on, as I’d much rather sit at home alone with a book all day and avoid people.

And yet, in most instances, when I’m with friends or loved ones, my day gets much better as a result. And thus, I prioritize saying YES. (Just not too much, so we don’t overload Future Steve.)

Overwhelmed? Do these 8 Things

Okay! This is my 8-step kickstart kickass strategy to dealing with overwhelm and anxiety.

Feel free to hijack these 8 things and the next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, take these steps to get unstuck and back on track:

Get an early win

Quick hygiene fix

Watch a 5-minute motivational video

Do the 10-10-10 Protocol

Do the Very Next Thing

Breathe, idiot!

Consume less, produce more

Ask for help

Break this list in case of emergency! Write these down, print it out, design your own checklist and share it with me so I can add it here to the post, whatever you want to do!

You can do this!

I’d love to hear from you: how do you manage overwhelm, and what are the steps you take to get out of that mental quicksand?!

Leave a comment below!

-Steve

PS: This week’s Rebel Hero: Nick T: rocking his new NF Battle Gear!

I can only assume he worked out so hard and flexed so perfectly that he blew the sleeves right off of it 🙂 Nick has been a super supportive member of our community for years and I’m damn glad he’s here.

Want to be the next Rebel Hero? Take a photo of you doing something epic in your NF battle gear, tag us on Instagram with #NerdFitness #battlegear, or email us at contact@nerdfitness.com!

PHOTO SOURCES: All amazing LEGO photos are from Black Zack, whose photos are here on Flickr.

Overwhelmed? Here Are the 8 Things I Do to Get Unstuck. published first on http://fitnetpro.tumblr.com/