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simpz-art-stash · 3 years ago

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Late beginnings

Summary: Mac goes out for a drink, and happens upon some advice he takes into consideration about his skewered relationship with Wukong. Before finally taking some action to mend the long burnt bridge. (Author’s note: I barely did any beta reading for this so if it’s worded strangely that’s just how I write without the normal filter on. I’m country so HOWDY) Next Page ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- The night was late, but he didn’t care, he might as well have been nocturnal with the way his whole life revolved around the whole stereotype of shadows and shit. He’d walked into a bar he’d passed through a few times before, donning his human disguise of course beforehand, and walked in without sparing anyone else a glance. Before planting his rear in one of the stools seated at the front bar, ordering a drink to get the night started. “I’m really looking forward to seeing that new Monkey King movie with the trailer they just released. You saw it too right?? The whole style of the film is on par with their most recent game- OH, you think they’re gonna make a game of it?? I bet you they wiiiill!~” Ugh, great, just what he’d come here to avoid.

Mac’s eyes glanced to the blabbermouth boasting about whatever new movie was being made about his ex, to see two girls residing a ways down near the other end of the bar a few seats away from him. Both looking to have had a fair night themselves already if any of the cups and plates hanging around their spot was anything to go by. “Probably. I hope it’s better than last game that came out on the Brick 360, the bugs in that thing were gross to deal with.” Their friend commented back. Before looking down at their phone and claiming that it was getting late and that they had to go. “Yeah I’ll see ya Monday!” The chick waved their friend off a lazy farewell after they’d paid their bill before going back to their drink, now taking less tedious sips as the mood seemed to smooth out from their conversation prior. “I see someone’s a pretty big fan of that ol’ man.” Macaque piped up from where he sat, earning the attention of the stranger he’d directed his comment towards. “The Monkey King yeah?” Sparks danced in the chick’s eyes at the recognition of the name, before the stranger perked up and beamed a smile back at him, “You betcha! I’m a total nerd for that legend.” ‘A legend, hah.’ “S’the whole reason I moved to China in the first place.” She jabbed a thumb at her chest, “All the way from America!” Mac whistled, “That’s a pretty far leap to take, even for a legend. What, you hopin’ you’ll get the chance to see em’ or somethin’?” He sneered, taking his glass and lazily swirling it in his hand. “I wish!” She laughed, “Nah I mostly just moved here for work. If anything though it’s cuz a them for where I am now. I’d never even heard of him till about five years ago!” Mac blinked, lowering his drink from his lips, “You’re joking…”

“Not at all! No one hardly knows the story back home. Only reason I found out was cuz I just started gettin’ into anything monkey-related as a hobby.” She pointed at him, “Don’t laugh either, it’s a wildly popular standpoint to have these days online.” Mac quirked a brow at that, he’d hardly touched the internet these days save for whenever he needed some quick info on something he couldn’t find elsewhere. He held his hands up, “Hey I ain’t judging…” He smirked a little to betray the look that he totally was though. It was kinda funny how ironic it was him being there right then. She squinted at him, “Anyways...Yeah, I’d seen stuff of him online, but I’d never paid much attention to it up until recently.” “What made you change your mind?” Mac boredly probed, taking a sip. She simply shrugged, “I was in a dark headspace, guy made me laugh.” He paused, “Wait, seriously??” “I mean have you HEARD half the crazy shit he’s done??” ‘Babe I’ve LIVED through half the shit he’s done.’ “Like, literally, the guy is HILARIOUS. My favorite story out of them all being one where he literally tricked THREE taoist immortals into drinking his own piss!!” She burst out laughing while Mac choked on his drink a little, not having expected to hear that of all things. Sure he’d heard a few of the shenanigan’s his peaches had gotten up to throughout his journey to the west but he’d never heard that one before. Nor had he the patience to read through all that mess of context that had been published either. “Ahhh man, it still gets me…” The chick sighed with a few leftover laughs as she wiped a tear from her eye. “What about you? What’s your favorite story?” She asked. And suddenly Mac felt like he’d been put on the spot as he stared back at her. “Come ooon, surely there’s one that’s gotten your gut rolling.” She pried. ‘Plenty, but there ain’t no way in hell I’d tell a soul.’ “Bahh...there ain’t the first one that comes to mind that I’d like. Honestly I’m not even much of a fan.” He waved his hand dismissively. “Whaaat?? Aw come on! There’s tons of cool n’ funny stories!” “Heh..can’t imagine what you find so charming about a guy who’s too good for his own friends.” Mac spitefully twacked himself mentally for spewing something so personal like that out. Ugh, and he hadn’t even finished half his drink yet… The chick sitting to his left seemed to tilt her head a little before she squinted at him. Her silence being what brought his attention from his drink to her as he blinked back with a quirked brow. “What?” “Your eyes, they’re like raging storm clouds.” She pointed out. He blinked, not really sure how to feel about that. The only one who’d ever really pointed that out to him before was… “...So?” “Nothing!...” She shrugged, turning back away towards her own drink as if no conversation at all had happened between them. Whatever...he had his fill of shit to drink to either way. The night might’ve been late but he was just getting started. “He makes me laugh though.” She pointed out, earning her a glance. “All his stories n’ stuff. If there was ever a man I’d want, it’d be one who could always make me laugh.” “Hmph, not one for strength?” He took a long sip. Ignoring the bitterness of others fawning over someone he’d come to love before he’d gotten so popular. “Strength is fine n’ all, but it can only take a relationship so far..you gotta have more pieces to put in that crockpot of a relationship if you wanna make it taste good. Stuff like patience, honesty, a little bit of everything to help it all come together to make it juuuuust right.” “Hm…” “It can’t be all just you putting the stuff in there either, it’s gotta be a contribution from both gardens. Otherwise you’ll just barren your lands and be left with nothing to spare yourself or others in your life with.” She glanced at Mac, “Relationships are tricky like that, but they should always be a 50/50 split~” She winked. That...actually sounded like pretty sound advice. Something he’d heard a little here and there before but never so simply laid out. Though it made sense from his standpoint, fairness n’ all that. But he’d been that way with Wukong before and it had never worked out, all the bickering and such, so what had gone wrong? “Can I...ask you something?” Mac inquired. “Shoot.” “What’re your thoughts on..a relationship that seemed fine, but then the other changed so much that everything about it fell apart?” “Mmm...care to sprinkle in a lil more context?” The chick eyed him. Mac’s face scrunched up a little, no idea why he was asking some random mortal for relationship advice of all things. “Hey man. We’re both probably never gonna meet again after tonight, so if you’ve got skeletons in your closet, your best place to let em’ out is here. Bartenders are known for being the most well kept secret keepers in all the world after all~” She winked at the bartender in question who simply looked the other way with a look that might’ve suggested such a fact as truth. “Hm…” Ah screw it, “Alright alright…” He sighed and put his drink down, “There’s..someone. We used to be real close, we were strong together but then uh..shit got real and he had to go deal with it. But when he came back he uh, wasn’t the same as before, an I might’ve sorta assumed he was cheating on me so…so we kinda fell out.” The chick nodded, “Ahh..the classic misunderstanding of change and cheating, a tale as old as time.” She seemed to hum a moment before she turned from where she was seated, if not to hop down off her stool and plop down on the one right up next to him. “Uh-” “Shhh, lemme see those eyes.” She squinted, leaning in and staring deep into his. It’d would’ve been really unnerving if she hadn’t said anything about them before, now he was a lil put off that he might’ve been asking a witch of all things for advice… “Right. Well, at least you feel bad about it. So there’s that.” He blinked and his brows furrowed, “Wh- of course I feel bad about it, it was his fault-” He suddenly had a finger pressed to his lips. “Nope! Nooononono, you do not get to throw all the blame elsewhere like that sweetheart. There ain’t no way in hell you’re gettin’ a second chance with them if you keep that up.” She pulled her hands back. His face scrunched up and he found himself crossing his arms, if he had his tail out it would’ve been irritably swaying behind him right then at just how annoyed he was getting at this weird lady and her words. “Oh yeah? An what do you think’s best then huh?” “I dunno if you’d be up for that kinda challenge…” She idly fiddled with an imaginative piece of lint off her sleeve, which only seemed to irritate Mac further at the thought of him not being able to handle Wukong of all people. Like sure he’d gotten his ass handed to him before but he could still hold his own! “Try me.” The chick glanced back at him with a smirk, which caught him off guard for a second before he shot her a glare back. “Alright, but it’s definitely not gonna be as quick or easygoing of a recovery as you might hope it’ll be. Nor is there even a chance of you recovering it in the first place. But, you at least got that spark enough to try so who am I to deny?” ‘Hmpt, dam right I got a spark.’

“First of all, no more blaming, if you’re gonna tackle this properly, you gotta do yourselves a favor an quit it with the blame placing. Sure it’s easy, but it ain’t gonna get you nowhere but back to square one. It’s all in the past, the now is now. So push forward to fix it and put it behind you two so you can focus on the more important things.” “Easier said than done…” “Hey man, even if they don’t follow the same ruleset at first you could always work things out to make it one later on. I’m just tellin’ ya right now so you won’t just go diggin’ yourself a deeper hole.” Honestly at this point he was pretty much six feet down under, death to him would’ve been a mercy right then. “Fine…” He rolled his eyes. “Next up, apologizing…” -----------~----------- “I thought I told you to stay off my island.” Mac didn’t really glance back from where he stood high up on one of the breathtaking ledges that which Flower Fruit Mountain bolstered. His arms crossed, eyes sternly held against the leftover warmth of the late afternoon sun as it shifted the skies hues from blue to blood red. Hopefully that would be the only tinge of red the Mountain would see after today. “I know.” “What, no witty remark? Give me one good reason-” “I just wanted to talk.” Mac stated plainly. “Why the hell should I give you the chance?” “...” Mac wasn’t sure if he could come up with a good enough reason after the shitshow he’d caused him the last few centuries, most recent being his spat with him between MK. “I’m sorry.” That seemed to catch the king off guard, as he paused in his vicious glare to stare at the other. “Excuse me??” “I’m.Sorry.” Mac turned finally to Wukong, that look of fiery malice having softened immensely upon meeting their eyes. “I was wrong for what I did and I’m sorry.” Wukong’s face looked like it had had a stroke with how frozen in place it was, almost like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Hurting everyone around you just to get back at you, I was wrong for doing that. And I just wanted to apologize.” Mac’s face twisted a little, the words coming out a little rougher than he’d liked, but he’d managed to get three steps in so far… “If you think a few sorry’s are gonna be enough to make up for all that crap then you gotta nother’ thing comin Mac.” Wukong finally shook off the surprise and crossed his arms with a steely gaze. “Nah I know they ain’t worth shit with as long as it's been...which it’s been..a really, really long time come to think of it..nearly 3000 years…” Fucking yikes. “What’s your point?...” Wukong raised a brow at him. “My point is...my point..” What was his point? To make amends and hope they’d get back together? To go back to the way things were? That couldn’t be done with the way things were now. Wukong had a successor, a moral compass, a lotta shit that Mac didn’t. A lotta shit that he wanted but never could figure out how to get his own. His face scrunched up a little and he sighed, “I..just wanted to make things right.” “Oh-hoh? After so long you finally decided to admit you were at fault? Sorry Mac, but it’s waaaay too late for that.” Wukong huffed, “Honestly, this is probably just another one of your stupid tricks if anything. The old Macaque would never throw himself down like that.” “Well maybe I’ve changed!” Mac exclaimed suddenly, his temper flaring a bit as his eyes flashed lightning. “3000 years later? As if…” Wukong rolled his eyes and turned away, “You’ve still got that same look in your eyes you always do whenever we fight. Do me a favor and just keep away from the hot springs this time yeah? The last time you were here you sent a whole dam boulder over there and smashed half the pools.” He waved his hand dismissively. “And I happen to take my once a month bath’s very seriously.” Mac’s nostrils flared a little at just how flamboyant Wukong was acting towards him and his attempt to make amends. How he just saw his attempt as a joke and nothing more, it pissed him off. Wukong had changed and everyone had accepted him, well not everyone, but still, why couldn’t the same be for him? Had he really fooled himself into believing that there was a chance he and Wukong could be together again? His shoulders slumped a little. Of course, who was he kidding. A 3000 year old pit of grudges wasn’t about to just up and disappear at the wave of a white flag. This was Wukong, the same guy who still playfully pestered the gods and demons around him for past conflicts that had happened between them. -----------~----------- “But you can’t just go, ‘ooo I’m so sorry for what I did.’ Nah, you gotta follow the five steps.” The chick claimed. “Yeesh, this a learning course now?” Mac tilted his head to the side. “It is if you wanna make things right.” She claimed matter a factly. “The five steps have never failed me before and have worked wonders for any an all my relationships. Might not quite have the same range of effect you’re going for but it’ll at least be a good start.” “Heh, you got the guts to back up that case?” Mac sneered. “I will if you don’t manage to screw it up.” The chick pointed out. “The five steps go as follows.” - express sorrow (I’m sorry) - own guilt (I was wrong) - name specific wrongs (I did X) - name impact (I hurt you) “And finally...” -----------~----------- “What can I do to prove myself to you?” Macaque asked finally. “What can I do to at least make it to where we can..not fight anymore..and just talk?...” Wukong stood there for a long moment, his features unreadable as their silence was muffled by the wind bellowing between them both from being so high up. “You really are serious about this aren’t you?...” Wukong’s head shifted ever so slightly, but not enough to where Mac could get a reading on his emotions. “I’m tired of fighting and waiting and thinking that if enough time passes things’ll go back to the way they were...when they never will. Trying to hurt you isn’t gonna make the old you come back, no matter how many times you beat me down...It’ll never be the same.” Mac admitted finally. A quiet gust settled down between them, before Wukong seemed to let out a dry chuckle and shook his head. “Can’t believe it took me 3000 years to beat the sense into you.” He turned and looked back at the other, where he no longer held a look of seething hate, but more akin to that of the same tired look just as the one Mac wore. Mac felt a sliver of guilt wriggle its way into one of the cracks of his heart and he glanced away, pulling a hand back and scratching his head. “Yeah well...your kid hit me pretty hard last time, enough to knock it in place.” A small smile crept a little onto his face. “Hm~ He’s gettin’ pretty good at hittin’ stuff with that old stick.” Wukong’s eyes glinted a little at the appeal of how proud he was for MK having taken Mac out the way he did. A little over the top and flashy, just like him.” “He’s got a pretty strong master to thank for that…” Mac found himself yearning a little for that same glint to be reflected on his memory the same way as MK’s. Not that he couldn’t see himself holding the same appeal for MK the way Wukong did, kid was strong, just a lil desperate in some of the cracks that shaped his outline. Something Macaque found that was easy enough to take advantage of, and something Wukong held a blind eye to. “Hm.” Wukong’s reply pushed him out of those thoughts for the moment as they shared a brief look between one another. A glimmer of reconsideration flashing between the two before Wukong finally turned his head away to drink in the sunset before them. “One chance.” Mac felt his heart nearly stop at that answer. “I’ll give you one chance, but if you screw this up, don’t even think about showing your face to me again.” Wukong replied, “I mean it this time…” Mac swallowed a little and nodded. Anything, he’d be willing to do anything to gain back what little trust he could from Wukong. “Good...you can start making up for it by apologizing to MK.” Mac blinked and sputtered a little as Wukong turned away and began to make his way back down the mountain. A smile playing on his lips while Macaque groaned to the heavens about his next trial.

#shadowpeaches #LMK #lego monkie kid #my fics #Sun Wukong #Macaque #AND MEEEEE #BECAUSE I SAID SO #>:3c

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thewolfofthestars · 4 years ago

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Questions to Ask When You’re Questioning Your Gender

So I'm trans myself and I've spent a lot of time thinking on this subject and talking to other trans people, as well as people who are questioning their genders. I've learned a lot over the past couple of years about what gender is, what it means to me, what it means to others, what it means to society, and most relevant to this post--how to figure out what your gender actuallly is. Cuz this shit ain't always easy. In fact, most of the time it's pretty hard. So I'm putting together a list of questions you can ask yourself if you're questioning your gender.

Please keep in mind: you probably won't relate to everything on this list! There are trans people who don't relate to this stuff and there are cis people that do relate to this stuff. Not every single thing on this list is a 100% surefire sign you're definitely trans, and you don't need to agree with every single point on the list in order to be trans. I am merely making this list in order to get you thinking in a more helpful and productive way to figure out your gender. Additionally: You do not have to figure out your gender if you don't want to! If you're perfectly content just to call yourself by a big umbrella term like "nonbinary" or "genderqueer", or if you just don't want to put a label to your gender at all, that is absolutely fine. This list doesn't need to be for you.

Highly reccommended reading, btw: The Null HypotheCis--https://freethoughtblogs.com/nataliereed/2012/04/17/the-null-hypothecis/

-Do you ever find yourself wishing that you were another gender? How often? How intense are these feelings when they arise?

-Do you ever find yourself wondering what your life would be like if you were born as a different gender? How often? How do you feel when you think about it?

-Do you find yourself looking at or admiring people of another gender very often? Is this admiration not really the same as romantic/sexual attraction--it feels different, somehow? Do these people just look really good or cool to you, in a special way that you can't really explain?

-Do you find yourself feeling jealous of other genders at all? Why do you think you feel this jealousy?

-If you are not otherwise LGBTQ+, do you find yourself feeling connected to or attracted to the LGBTQ+ community in a way you can't really explain? Do you feel attracted to the trans community in particular?

-Do you feel more comfortable or happier around trans/nonbinary people? Do you feel as though you can relate to trans/nonbinary people better than you can relate to cis people?

-If you are attracted to people of the same gender as your AGAB (Assigned Gender At Birth), does "gay" feel like the right word for that attraction or not?

-If you are attracted to people of the opposite gender as your AGAB, does "straight" feel like the right word for that attraction or not?

-Do you have trouble understanding your sexual/romantic orientation? Have you changed your labels several times, or perhaps never put a label on your attraction at all? Have you just kinda slapped a label on at random until further notice?

-Do you feel very uncomfortable engaging with your sexuality at all? Do you identify as asexual or sex-repulsed, because of this discomfort?

-Do you experience distress or discomfort when in sexual situations, for no otherwise discernable reason (i.e. nonconsensual situations or dealing with past sexual trauma)? Do you find yourself dissociating during or after a sexual situation? What about anxiety or panic? Do you find yourself becoming depressed after sex or masturbation?

-Do you find that you need to "get into a different headspace" in order to have sex or masturbate?

-When you wear clothes commonly associated with your AGAB, how does it make you feel? Happy? Sad? Do the clothes feel like you, or does it feel more like a costume, like you're cosplaying or performing in a play? How does it feel when you wear clothes more commonly associated with other genders?

-How do you feel when you imagine yourself far into the future, living as an elderly person? Do you find it hard to imagine yourself in old age as your AGAB? How does it make you feel? What about as other genders?

-Do you find yourself coming up with excuses for reasons that you aren't trans that, when held up to scrutiny, don't actually work? Phrases such as "Well, I didn't know when I was little, I didn't start questioning until I was X age (people of any age can question their gender and figure out they're trans)", or "I don't have genital dysphoria, so I can't be trans (trans people can have all sorts of feelings about their genders--no particular kind of dysphoria is required to be trans, or even any dysphoria at all)".

-Do you find yourself thinking things like "Well, statistically, trans people are so rare, there's no way I'm trans"? What about "I'm already (other marginalized identity(ies)), I can't possibly also be trans"? What about "I have a friend/family member/someone else in my life that's trans, I'd just be copying them"? (None of these things need to mean that you're not trans!)

-Do you have a very "mind over matter" mentality? Were you more of a smarts or arts kid than you were a sporty kid in school? Are you the kind of person who wishes your consciousness could be uploaded to the cloud or something like that, so you can leave this fleshy body of yours behind?

-Do you find yourself frustrated with society's emphasis on gender and gender roles? Do you ever feel that gender doesn't even matter at all, and you're confused as to why everyone cares about it so much?

-Do you feel constrained or trapped by being your AGAB? Do you feel like you would be so much freer and happier as a different gender?

-If you could press a button right now and wake up tomorrow as a cis member of the opposite gender, as if you'd always been that way, with a body of a cis person and with everyone referring to you like that, would you press it?

-Do you believe that everyone of your your AGAB probably wants to be a different gender, at least a little bit? Are you baffled when people of your AGAB don't agree with this sentiment?

-Did you ever wonder if or secretly hope that you were intersex? Did you ever get tested by medical professionals for an intersex condition? If so, how did the results make you feel? Were you happy to learn that you're intersex, or dissappointed to learn that you aren't?

-Does it seem difficult for you to be your AGAB, like it doesn't really come naturally to you, and you have to learn how to do it and actively try to be it? Have you felt like you've needed to construct and maintain an identity for yourself as your AGAB? Do you think being a different gender would feel more natural to you, and you wouldn't have to work at it?

-Do you find yourself thinking thoughts like "Well, I don't hate being my AGAB, but I would prefer to be a different gender/would be happier as a different gender"? (I'll give you a hint--you don't need to hate being your AGAB in order to justify being a different gender! You can just be a different gender if that makes you happier.)

-Do your genitals or reproductive organs upset you? Do you wish you didn't have them? Do you think you'd be happier having the opposite set of genitals/reproductive organs? What about having no genitals/reproductive organs? What about having a mix between the two?

-Do your genitals or reproductive organs not really feel like they're a part of you? Do they feel like a seperate entity that's just attached to you or inside of you, but they aren't really you? Do you dissociate when you look at or think about your genitals/reproductive organs? Do you try to avoid looking at or thinking about them?

-Regarding the above two points--ask yourself these same questions about your secondary sex characteristics (i.e. breasts, body hair, hips, the pitch of your voice, etc.)

-Do you only feel these feelings sometimes? If so, when you don't feel these feelings, do you actually feel good about these aspects of yourself, or do you just feel less bad?

-What if I told you right now that you are absolutely, definitely, 100% a cis person, and that you're not trans at all? How does that make you feel? What if I told you that you're definitely, 100% for-sure a trans person? How does that make you feel?

-Were you a particularly androgynous child or present yourself in a gender non-conforming way when you were younger? Did you ever have a "phase" of presenting in this way?

-Alternatively, did you ever present yourself as a very gender conforming person when you were younger (i.e. hyperfeminine if AFAB or hypermasculine if AMAB)? Did you ever have a "phase" of presenting in this way?

-According to the last two points--did you ever alternate between these two modes of presentation? How did these types of presentation make you feel?

-Are you afraid of the idea of this "trans phase" or "questioning phase" being over? Are you afraid of going back to identifying as the gender you were born as?

-Do you like the idea of being a crossdressing or GNC person of the gender you were assigned at birth, or does the thought of being a different gender make you feel happier? (i.e. if you're AMAB, are you happiest when you think of yourself as a crossdressing boy/drag queen, or do you think you would be happier if you were a girl instead? Or perhaps some other gender?)

-Have you ever taken a "guess your gender/am I trans" quiz online, even just for fun? What were the results? How did the results make you feel? Did you intentionally try to skew your answers toward or away from a particular result? Did you go back and take the quiz again, wanting to get a different result?

-What sorts of gendered terms are you happiest and most comfortable being called by? Do you like the idea of being "mom" or "dad" better? What about "brother" or "sister"? "Girlfriend" or "boyfriend"? Or do you dislike both gendered options, and prefer gender-neutral terms like "parent" or "sibling" or "partner"?

#questioning #questioning gender #gender questioning #transgender #nonbinary #trans #nb #enby #pride #pride 2020

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beecherdrysdale · 4 years ago

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Hiii how are you ? I fell down the stairs today and cried for a minute straight #hormones. Dw I have a high pain tolerance but I just started sobbing lol. It happens. LONG post ahead, I kinda went off hehe.

Anyways let’s get started!! Yes quinton gets to be upfront because he would probably feel so uncomfortable(no offence) with all the sexual tension going on there if dyl or jamie were in the front hehe. But yes they would be bitchy about who gets to sit upfront “ no Jamie it’s mine turn to sit with Brigid” “ no it’s my turn dylan you just sat with her” so brigid would get fed up and banishes them to the back hehe. Lmao Brigid can we listen to Katy perry now? The silence!! And then no can we listen to Lady Gaga?. Quinton trying not to lose it in the front seat. If I had to chose tho I would chose lady gaga:) wbu?

Get ready to be beat! Yes Ryan is absolutely not sitting upfront w me! We would be crazy and I wanna win so. Quinner is sitting up front w me but he decided to be .... and I’m banish him to the back. Braden is the most chill so he’s sitting upfront and giving me directions!! Haha dyl yelling at you to drive faster, but no I will beat both hehe;). Kesh who’s sitting up front w you? Would Kirby be handsy😏?. We would have to make so many stops lol. Like it’s just nostalgic for us, but new for you so it would be fun to make pit stops. and we would just be taking so many Instagram photos as a group and w our boys and together ! We love that ! “Wait wait wait Lexi pull over, I remember this place I wanna take photos” lol this is bad hehe.

Lmao yes, your hair would be so tangled!! They would be panicking a bit because they’re like omg she’s gonna be so mad.... honestly Ryan would just take the photo and then post it but then Dylan would repost it and then Jamie and then me lol. Honestly I kinda love when people just take videos of being in the car w like the scenery showing, but this would include us laughing and listening to music! I hope they makes sense. Hehe Ryan or Dylan would probably take photos of Braden, cozzy and devon sleeping and would post it. Back to the hair: hehe yes I can see you giving them a death glare when you realize and your getting mad and would hide. I’m just imagining this in my head, like me pulling over and you running out of the car and quinton and devon fixing your hair lol. Somebody would be filming this no doubt.

Music wise, yes I love blasting music and people looking but it’s kinda a flex when they see who we are with.... I like rap too! What song do u like Brigid?. Country will be played and 2000’s which is fun! I’m good with anything !. Kesh I love hype up songs as well and bass heavy songs because they sound good on speakers hehe. I’ve been into Rihanna for the past week and I was working out to her music- where have you been, rude boy, bitch better have my money lol, pon de replay hit different but also S&M for some sexiness. Lmao sorry I’m just listing Rihanna songs that I love atm. What are your fav songs right now? Awww dancing on the side of the road is so soft, but everybody needs a dance break! Cozzy, Devon and Braden are some how still passed out, I admire that. Late night drives🥺 are we spicing this up 😏.

Hehe you and devon are swamped w emails and more and you’re like kirby can you please go w them we need somebody to watch them. Als yes quinton go take those hot photos . I admire Dylan’s sleep schedule, like good job on catching up on sleep. Kirbys just trying to sweet talk you and kiss you so that you wouldn’t be mad. All in all, kesh is just shocked like how is that possible? Lmao Brigid, Ryan and I w the shopping cart just stocking up on popcorn, chips m&ms, I love that. Jamie and Dylan are racing each other to see who can grab the most cereal and made sure that they are getting the correct ones for Brigid. Honestly all the boys are just confused about how grocery shopping works hehe. The crackhead energy. Kirby is panicking. We literally bought out all the snacks. Beaver tails are delish and I know where you can get them so 😃. I want to stuff Quinner’s mouth w beaver tails cuz that’s cute:) yes healthy food is a must, like fruits, veggies, rice cakes hehe. But remember that we are going to workout on this vacay hehe. After the grocery store we would go into the mall or something and the boys would just be wanting to buy video games 😂 and ps5’s. Also kesh I love how some of the boys are just trying on clothes. Why do I get a feeling that one of the boys would just be filming all of this?

The chirping will happen nonstop, I’m sorry it’s just to much inspo. Aww yes they are blushing real hard, cuz they like you soooo much. But Brigid is enjoying touching them so no prob.

The boat is a must and it is happening!! Hehe yes the tubing would be chaotic, everybody is just trying to get each other to fall in 😂. Ryan thinks that he’s getting away w pushing me in but SIKE you are coming with me. So then we’re just fighting in the water. Quinner would be like where did they go?. Hehe brigid gets so wrapped up in laughing at us that Braden pushes her in haha. Yes we all look super hot in our bikinis, and the boys are speechless! Like dyl and Jamie are just like wow, she looks so amazing! And Kirby is so in love w you, he’s like I’m the luckiest man ever. I’m still gonna make sure that I wear a non tie bikini so that it doesn’t untie, like one time I was in the boat and my friend pulled on the string and the entire thing untied and I just jumped in the water to retie. That is not happening again lol. Quinner would be mad hehe. Idk I’m seeing Brigid in a black bikini or maybe a dark blue one? It would match your eyes?. Kesh in a red one or yellow and me maybe in a green one or just black lol. Hehe yes kesh and Kirby are just doing cute couple stuff and keeping an eye out but we are to chaotic to maintain .

Hehe yes ig we are clingy but cute drunks but I get kinda wild when I drink so the body shots would def happen. It would be hot tbh. Yes somebody do body shots w Brigid. Dylan would step up first, and he would be enjoying it and then Jamie sees and is like no it’s my turn so he does it and in the end it’s just a competition and you all get drunk hehe. Kesh and Kirby are the parents of the clubbing trip no offence.. like wanna go help cozzy and devon? Hehe lol I could just be dancing w Brigid and the boys would get jealous and one of them would just come up and be like excuse may I cut in, and i would be like tf but then they give me a glare and I go dance sexy with Quinner or crazy w Ryan. Kesh and Kirby should dance at least at one point during this time. We all look hot btw :)

Hehe yay I can be friends w Dylan :) I want that friendship to happen tbh. but he’s getting jealous but I’m like let them have their moment, so I distract him a bit w talking.

Girls day is a must! I wanna hang out w you so badly. Some cute clothing will be bought! Ooo yes us modelling and them being in awe. Oo kesh a different modelling show w the boys 😏. The boys are getting handsy esp Dylan and Jamie hehe. And they are super protective so no other guy at the club gets any ideas. After tho it’s biker shorts, sweat pants and hoodies type of vacay lol .

Thank you for reading ! Hope you enjoy mes chéries💗🌸

yes ok so loooong post ahead people

oof that tough falling down the stairs lol. honestly i’m not doing to great right now bc i did not do as well as i wanted at my meet, so now i’m in a funky headspace. but hopefully answering this ask will help, and i can get my shit together before my events tomorrow (which are actually my important events)

haha yes dyl and jamie would just be arguing like “no it’s my turn to sit in front, no you just did it’s my turn” lmao. and then whenever they’re sitting in the front there’s just too much tension for quinton to deal with lol. so then i feel bad for quinton so i banish the other guys to the back and let him sit in the front hehe. and i’m just ignoring the other guys and refuse to play either of their music and i let quinton pick. and if we purposely pick songs we know the other guys hate, that’s a secret we’ll never tell. oof between those two idk, probably lady gaga, but again we’re not playing music jamie and dyl like lol.

haha no, you get ready to get beat. i’m like an INSANE driver when i want to be. and ofc dylan is just yelling at me “faster brigid, hurry tf up! we have to beat everyone” so then we’re just zooming. but then obviously you’re doing your best to keep up so you have to banish ryan to the back so he doesn’t distract you. and then you let quinner sit up front until he starts getting too handsy bc you’re like no i won’t let myself get distracted. so then braden’s up front giving directions and trying to get you to go faster, but i’m still winning lol. and then kesh is also still in the race, and she and kirby are just chilling in the front bc everyone else’s asleep. ooooh yes making lots of pit stops bc nostalgia for all of you canadians. and then me and kesh are just seeing all the sights for the first time. oooooh yes all the cute insta pics we could take

ooooh yes people taking vids of like the music and scenery would be so cute to post as stories. and ofc all of us laughing and stuff, that would be so cute. anyways yes, my hair would be a hugeeee knot. and i would just give them the death glare, like you’ve got to be fucking kidding me. and jamie and dyl just try to hide from me, like they run away as soon as the car is stopped. and then devon and quinton fix it for me, god bless their souls. like i’m sorry, bc even i wouldn’t want to deal with that. ik how my hair can get. and this would be allllll over everyone’s stories ofc lmao

ok yessss our music game is on point tbh. ok so for rap, the artists i’m really into rn are juice wrld (rip i actually loved him sm), kid laroi (who learned from juice, so he sounds a lot like him), trippie redd, mgk, and nf. also iann dior, but he’s not so much rap as r&b. honestly any of their songs slap. and then ofc country and early 2000′s. and any music with good bass, but i think a lot of the artists i said have that. ooooh yes getting out to have a dance party on the side of the road. hehe it could be really crazy. or alternatively, it could be when you’re out on a late night drive and there’s a slow song on the radio and you guys just get out and slow dance to the song together no this is not at all inspired by the song slow dance in a parking lot anyways yes late night drives are so cute. but then of course they can get spicy 😏 in case you couldn’t tell i’m always down for it to get spicy lmao

haha yes quinton and dylan c. honestly have their priorities straight. and devon and kesh are swamped with director duties, so that leaves kirby in charge. so then ofc when we get home kirbs tries to sweet talk kesh, but she’s just not having it. she’s just like how? anywaysssss at the store we have the most duo of ryan and lexi, plus now i’m added into the mix, and it’s just a mess. like we buy a shit ton of popcorn, pretzels, chips, candy, etc. and we literally bought half the store’s supply of everything lmao. and then dyl and jamie are just in the cereal aisle trying to grab as much cereal as they can. whichever one of them gets we chocolate mini wheats i will love forever. and then kirby’s getting healthy food bc yk he’s trying to be responsible. so then kesh has to explain that his whole job was to make sure everyone else was getting healthy food, not just get it himself lmao. but honestly none of the guys actually know what they’re doing lmao. and then we obviously have to get beaver tails to so lexi and quinner can have a moment, but idk where you get those lol. but yes we will be working out a ton on this vacay, so it’s ok that we have sm junk food lol. and then after we’re done with food, the guys decide to wander the mall and then they just buy a ton of video game and then they’re trying on clothes lol. and yes obvi they’re videoing the whole thing bc they’re secretly middle school girls who want to have a blog lmao

hehe yes me getting chirped the whole trip, esp the boat day. and the guys are getting so embarrassed about it, but i just don’t care lmao. and then the whole boat day is so chaotic obvi. when ryan pushes lexi in, quinner will come back and just be confusion lmao. like where’s lexi. and then i’m dying laughing and then braden sneaks over and pushes me in lol. but yes we all look amazing in our bikinis. like kirby is just so in love with kesh and thinks she looks gorgeous 😍 and then dyl and jamie are just like damn you look hot about me lol bc we’re horny ones on this trip apparently. and i’ll wear a tie-back jolyn bc they actually stay on lol. and then ofc quinner thinks lexi looks super good, but then she tells the story about the last time she wore a tie-back and he’s just like why didn’t you do it again? lmao. ooooh for bikinis i like a black top with a print on the bottoms idk why. and then you guys in whichever color you want. also yes kesh and kirby are trying to be responsible during this, but it’s just not working lol

haha yep i can definitely see you and quinner being wild drunks together (it’s more like when the alcohol is wearing off that you guys get really clingy) so obvi you guys start doing body shots. and ofc it turns into a jamie/dyl competition bc what doesn’t? and then me and lexi are just dancing sexy together, yk like two drunk girls do, and then dyl or jamie tries to come over and cut in and at first you won’t let them but then you finally give in and go dance with quinner instead. and then yeah, no offense kesh and kirby, but y’all are the parents here. like making sure we don’t do anything too too dumb lmao. and also being a wingman for some of the other guys. but you guys def dance together at least a little bit too. and obvi we all look hot

yessss i feel like you and dyl could be super chaotic friends too. so the two of you are just chilling together and then you have to distract him lol, but then after that you have a different chaotic friend for when ryan’s not available lmao

yes yes yes, girl’s day would be so fun. and then we get a ton of cute new clothes so obvi we have to model them. and they’re all just in awe, like those are our girls. but then we also do private modeling shows 😏 and we all know how that ends. and then when we’re in our clubbing clothes obvi they are getting super protective over us bc we look so hot and we’re their girls, so no other guys can get ideas. but then once they’re drunk they’re handsy as hell lol. but then the rest of the vacay ends ups spent in hoodies, sweats, and athletic shorts lol. and obvi some of the guys’ clothes

ughhhh i love this, the whole thing was amazing. 10/10

#ask answered #anon answered #skating anon

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dangan-happy · 4 years ago

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[Enoshima, I'm bald] To Mikan, Mukuro, and Miu. This week for me has been bad to say the least. I've had a few bad moments with someone I love, basically emotionally hurting them without meaning to. Then having to deal with my group of "friends" I play games with. I don't like them in any way, they just say the most disgusting things (all racist or homophobic) and I have to always just keep it all down otherwise I'll just be exiled, which basically did happen just the other day because of reasons. I only put up with them because I never can make friends, it's just always been a difficulty for me. Some comfort and possibly any advice if possible?

These kinda friends of yours…yea, glad you put those quotation marks. Cuz that ain’t friends at all! Especially when they’re disgusting pigs who are racist and homophobic, what the hell is wrong with them?!

Look anonymous…sure they can be the only “friends” you have but you can’t be in that situation any longer than you need to be. If you need new friends, don’t be afraid to reach out on social media, hell, I’m offering myself to be your friend!! You don’t need shits like those around you. Bad influences only make you feel awful and put you in a negative headspace, ‘ya don’t deserve that!

I can understand why you’re afraid though. Talking to new people can be difficult, take your time with that kinda stuff, you don’t need to force yourself to have new friends immediately.. I think you should look for friends have the same interest as you do, but make sure they’re not terrible like these ones are.. As for the person you are with, not every relationship is perfect, fights are bound to happen, I can only hope they’re not…fights where it’s psychical..

---------------- U-Uwah! w-why would they even say such things?!- There isn't a-anything wrong with being part o-of the LGBTQ+ community o-or being of color!-

I-I agree with l-leaving that friend group, you sh-shouldn't stay in that situation at all! you can c-call them your only ''f-friends'' of course- But it doesn't m-mean other people wouldn't be friends with y-you! I'm sure there is a-a lot of people out there wanting to be friends with you!- I-I would love to be one of t-them! Th-This type of people aren't the type a lot would l-like to be around with, t-they can affect you i-in a bad way! A-And you don't deserve a-any of that, Anonymous!

I-I can understand why you are scared... I-I was like you when i was younger, a-and I still am!- but it dosen't mean you won't g-get any new friends. T-Take your time, find people w-who have the same likings as you and aren't l-like those other ''friends''... N-Now as for your partner.. r-relationships aren't perfect.. arguments will happened at a-any moment without knowing sometimes.. I-I hope t-that they don’t evolve into the p-psychical fights... S-Sure hurting someone e-emotionally can be b-bad, but you didn’t mean t-to do that after all... I-I hope you and your partner ca-can talk it out about that..

I-I wish you good luck with everything, A-Anonymous! P-Please stay safe!

-----------------------------

It’s as Iruma and Tsumiki said, these kind of “friends” are terrible to be around. Not to mention how much of a negative influence they could have on you. I’m not saying that you will, but there’s always a possibility that you could pick up on their bad habits and I’m sure you don’t want that, correct?

As for having bad moments with this person you love, hm, this is a bit difficult. I’m not too familiar with relationships in that regard but I would suggest talking it out with them. I’ve heard of communication being the most important thing when it comes to love.

Everything will be alright, that much I can assure you Anon, even if things seem bleak right now. There are going to be more people that come along and I can only hope for your sake that they aren’t racist, homophobic or an awful person in general. Iruma and Tsumiki have given the best advice they could give so I will reassure you once again that you deserve better friends. Rather, you deserve better people to be around. Please take care and remember that, alright Anon?

#danganronpa #danganronpa roleplay blog #ask #miu iruma #mod rockstar #mikan tsumiki #mod mikan #mukuro ikusaba #mod karma

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starlling-writes · 4 years ago

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Bewitching Monsters - Deity (O’dos) Part 3

Series Rating: 18+ Chapter Contains: brief manhandling, drinking, minor swearing, drug use (psychedelic mushrooms) Pairing: f/fluid BeMo Masterlist ☆ Writing Masterlist

I ended up at the Laughing Grove—the brasserie Valzok took me to. Caera and Aleril had likely followed me but they were giving me room. My distant headspace must be that obvious.

Citra was working tonight. He brought me my first drink and asked what was wrong. I couldn’t bring myself to tell him. He didn’t pry, but said if it was something Valzok did, he’d be happy to kick his ass for me. That actually made me smile.

The live music tonight was a lovely guitar and piano duet. Both of the girls sang too. Their music was soft and warm. Combined with the alcohol, most of my anxieties were lulled away. My gaze wandered around the room. A few couples were slow dancing on the dance floor. Many people were here on dates too. Seeing so much love muddled my heart. I finished off my drink and left.

“So melancholic.” I jumped and looked at O’dos. They were making a habit of just popping in today. This time, they wore the guise of an androgynous drow in simple clothing. “Are you truly that adverse to our agreement?”

“I don’t want to be a shitty mother,” I confessed. “I don’t wanna ruin someone else’s life because family is a foreign concept to me.”

“You have no need to worry, dear witchling. I know you. You will do fine.”

The sentiment was appreciated, but the words wouldn’t sink in. How could a deity understand when I couldn’t even articulate all my troubles? O’dos’s dark laugh echoed in my head. I flinched, noticing now I was no longer walking through town. We were in the void I often communicated with them in.

“For someone of your level, you hold much doubt over yourself.”

“Is this an intervention now?”

“No,” they answered a little too quickly and flippantly. “Your troubles are your own to handle. I am only concerned with those inhibiting our deal.”

I began wondering if there was a bit of fea in them—or maybe fae got it from the gods. “I wouldn’t say anything is inhibiting it; I’m just…hesitant, to meet this future. There are just so many unknowns.”

“Is that not life?”

I probably shouldn’t tell my patron deity to fuck off. Their smartassery was irksome, yet refreshing, helping to pull my mind from my worries. I met their gaze. There was more wisdom and knowledge swirling around in their eyes than I could ever wish to obtain. If they weren’t worried, then perhaps everything would be fine. Surely they knew better than I.

O’dos cupped my cheek and smiled softly. “One week, witchling.”

“And here I thought you were all out of kindness,” I joked.

Before I knew it, their hand was fisted in my hair, jerking my head back. They stepped closer, leaving half a breath between us. “Do not test me.”

I should have felt threatened. Not horny. Although… given the circumstances, being turned on right now was appropriate. It was ill timed, and influenced by alcohol, but fuck—it sent a delicious shock through me to be manhandled by them.

“One week,” O’dos repeated before vanishing and sending me home.

The next few days I kept my work door closed and isolated myself from most everyone. I needed deep introspection. The first couple days I tried the simpler approaches: meditation, journaling, divination. Those efforts didn’t get me far. I was getting no sense of hardships in this endeavor, yet something was keeping my heart from being at ease.

I prepared some mushrooms for myself the following day. I was surprised to find I still had any lying around. Many disagree with such methods, but using mushrooms was the best way I found to connect deeply with myself.

“Don’t let me be outside for more than an hour,” I told Caera.

“I still can’t believe you’re going out in this cold, Mistress.”

There was a small flurry going on, but I needed to be out in nature. “That’s why I said an hour at most. Just… have some cocoa ready for me when I come back in, please.”

“Of course."

I took the shrooms and turned on some music. Might as well dance a bit and get myself loose while I wait for the come up. And now that Caera had a body, she could dance with me. We swayed and twirled. I couldn’t remember the last time I danced with someone. Was it with Aero during Brumalis? Maybe. Though I would’ve been drunk then; and I’m almost high now… I needed to dance with others again when I’m sober. I needed to dance more.

My thoughts drifted and soon geometric runes started to dance in my vision. The drugs were kicking in. Time to brave the cold. But the music was so nice. And dancing with Caera was—

No! I had work to do. This wasn’t the occasion for fun.

It was a challenge to pull away from her. Especially knowing I was about to venture out into the dark winter night. I made two small balls of light to float around me and stepped outside.

The snow was barely falling now; the light caught the puffy flakes in a magical way. I could still hear the music playing inside. So I danced. The snow floated around me like flecks in water. I started to feel like I was floating too. Closing my eyes, I saw rainbow light filtering down through ocean waves, breaking into beautiful patterns. The designs gradually turned into an array of strobing, bioluminescent sea life. Fish, whales, turtles, jellyfish—so many creatures danced with me now.

A deep rumble brought me out of my trance. Vérus stood before me. “What are you doing?” he asked while I was distracted by the fading light trails of a school of fish.

“Dancing.”

“I meant, why are you outside?”

“Cuz I’m tripping on mushrooms and being outside helps me connect to nature better which will help me connect with my inner-self better and I need to do that cuz I have a lot of thinking and introspection I need to work on within the next four days,” I rambled.

He slowly blinked. “Did you take my ichor?”

“No, why?—Wait!” I gasped. “Would that help? By the moon, your ichor is gonna be a lot more useful than I thought. How do I take it though? Do I make a tea, or a tincture, or bake it in bread or something, or burn it like incense—”

“Stop,” he cut me off. “That is the opposite of what I meant. You need to go back inside.” He walked to my house and was about to let himself in when he looked back and noticed I had gone back to dancing in the snow. With a heavy sigh, he came and grabbed my arm to drag me along.

“Oh good, I was just about to go get you,” Caera said.

“It’s been an hour already?”

“Yes, Mistress.”

Huh, normally time felt slower when I tripped. I took the mug of cocoa from her and settled into the chair closest to the fire. My toes were freezing.

“And why are you doing all this?” Vérus asked dully.

That put a sharp damper on my trip. Why was he still here? I took a moment to stare at the fire before answering. “I’m going to be a mother soon.”

I knew what he had to be thinking. His unspoken questions made my skin crawl—it was like thousands of tiny spiders crawling over and nibbling at me. I immediately forced that imagery from my mind before the drugs made it worse. It threw me off a bit when he coolly asked, “And this required such… introspection, why?”

“I don’t know how to parent!” I slammed my mug down on the table, some cocoa sloshing out. “I don’t wanna fuck up. I don’t know if I’m ready for this.”

Vérus knelt on one knee before me and turned my face to look at him when I tried to look away. He was so close now. Runes ran down in face in the most intriguing patterns. “Witch. I’m not in the habit of giving compliments. That said—your skills are greater than any witch I’ve seen before. Your consideration draws others to you. I do not foresee you failing such a thing.”

He left me truly speechless for a moment. I still wasn’t used to him being this friendly. “This… is the weirdest trip I have ever had.”

— — —

BeMo Masterlist ☆ Writing Masterlist Story: Previous — Next Character Arc: Part 1 Part 2 [Here] Part 4

#monster love #exophilia #exophilia fiction #writeblr #god #deity #god x human #deity x human

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whateverisbeautiful · 6 years ago

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Reveling in Richonne

122: The I Love You’s (8x14)

First of all…

I have so been looking forward to breaking down this solid gold moment right here. Cuz y’all, it’s everything. 🙌🏾 So you already know I have to happy dance in advance lol.

Wait it’s still not out of my system. 😋

(Side note: I’m already extra when it comes to even their smallest moments so this is about to be extra x10. So thank you for putting up with me lol 🙏🏽😂 And this post is particularly long (cuz of course), so I’ll spare your TL with this one 👌🏽😊)

Lemme tell you, every time I see or even just remember this moment I cannot help but react to it with the same high energy I had when I first saw it. This moment gives me complete and utter joy and it also really moves me, so this will always be me when it comes to this scene…

Cuz y’all...they said it!! 🎉Won’t He Do It! Yes He Will! All the time! Forever and Ever! Amen. 🙌🏾😌🙌🏾😌

And I love that while it was a big celebratory moment for us, it was such a normal thing for them. All the way here for it. 👌🏽😊

It’s funny cuz I generally avoid spoilers but, the week before, I had been hearing murmerings that 8x14 might be the episode where they say it, and just the mere notion of that had me turning up. So literally the whole episode I was just waiting and watching like...

Cuz ever since I boarded this ship the thought of what those “I love you’s” would be like and when they would come was on my mind often. And we finally got to see it! And of course Danai and Andy knocked it out of the park. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

But first, to back track just a little bit, in the few moments prior we see Carol open up to Ezekiel about her daughter.

(Side note: I wish Carol and Michonne would talk more. They’re different in a lot of ways but also have a lot of similarities too. Like in Carol’s conversation with Ezekiel she shares about how these people helped her find a better version of herself and that’s the case for Michonne as well.👌🏽)

The main reason I bring up this moment tho, is because, when they cut to the wider shot, Carol and Ezekiel are holding hands which is sweet, and what I love most about it is that you can see Michonne sitting in the background, almost center with the hand hold. And y’all that’s not a coincidence. 💯

How did Richonne’s romantic relationship start? With a glorious hand hold. 🙌🏾😋 And it’s cool that we get some parallel to R&M’s 6x10 moment in the same episode that we get to witness another long awaited exchange. 😊 (And this also sort of suggests that Carol and Ezekiel might be joining the couples club that I think only Rick and Michonne are in rn.)

But seeing Michonne sitting alone made me kind of sad too cuz it makes me think about how she would totally be spending that time with Carl if he was there (or Rick if he wasn’t out wildin 🙃)

So they hear the gate open and then Michonne springs up cuz she knows her man has come home, which is probably a big relief for her, knowing his recent inclinations to leave and get himself in serious predicaments.

My favorite thing about seeing Michonne spring up like this is cuz, as many have pointed out, it’s so reminiscent to when Rick heard her arriving at the gate in the season 4 premiere. Y’all their magnetic connection is still going strong all these seasons. 😊

So then Rick and Morgan walk in looking like two bad kids who can solemnly swear they’ve been up to no good. 😂

And when Michonne sees him, she has a look that says she’s both relieved and also that she can tell her man has likely spent the day wildin all the way out.

Morgan walks up to Henry and tells him he was able to kill the Savior who killed his brother. And rather than relish the vengeance, Henry actually expresses sympathy that Morgan had to kill again and he tells him sorry.

And then I get hit hard upon hearing Morgan tell Henry “Don’t ever be sorry” cuz it’s exactly what Morgan told Carl back in “Clear.” 😭

I’m always here for a “Clear” reference in this show even tho it’s also a heartbreaking reminder that Carl isn’t there anymore. (And I hope this show knows that in no way will Henry be a legitimate replacement, so TWD don’t try to make fetch happen. Just saying.)

So while that’s going on, Rick is walking towards the main house and people are looking at him cuz Homeboy def looks like he’s been suspect. And he’s just sort of looking right back at people like “Say something, I dare you.” 😅

One person he doesn’t look at tho is Michonne and y’all I admit I was not feeling that. I was like; Rick don’t you walk past your girl without acknowledging her in some way. Like I know he’s in a daze and probably feeling guilty but at least nod or something bruh, especially after likely making her stressed all day about where he went.

As he walks away, Michonne watches him go and they emphasize her having this look.

Seeing this reaction from her briefly made me worried that maybe this show was heading towards another moment of distance between them or even disappointment cuz tbh Michonne wouldn’t be out of line if she did feel a little disappointed. So at first, when it came to where they stand, I was like…

But the thing is, Sis is so understanding and the epitome of a great wife so any worry that maybe this was going to cause an issue between them was quickly dispelled in the final scene of the episode.

So now onto the scene that has kept me on cloud nine for months. ☺️Lol. Lemme get prepared.

The scene starts with Rick walking into their room seeming freshly showered, and I love that there seems to be this comfortability with him returning to him and his woman’s room. Like I think they have him enter the scene this way to hit home that this is Rick at the most settled he’s been in a while.

And it’s significant to see him putting on a clean white tee cuz it really does feel like it’s meant to imply a clean slate as well as the lighter side he’s coming back to. He’s leaning into the good again, (now that he’s gotten some of the savagery out of his system lol)

Also I love that there’s this candlelight glow that’s totally paralleling the precious candlelit dinner proposal scene in 7x12. 🙌🏾 I think having that similar glow going just helps to set the tone that he’s more in that 7x12 headspace again, rather than the headspace we saw in the dive bar.

We then see Rick have a visible moment where he knows this is the time to open his letter, like his North Star told him to in this very room earlier in the episode. Everything that’s happened today has shown him that now is the time to stop running. So he goes to the drawer and takes out the letter.

So then, Michonne walks in and stops at the doorway and this whole moment is super similar to the scene earlier. Cuz just like Rick walked in and found Michonne holding her letter near the dresser, Michonne walks in to find Rick holding his letter in the same spot.

Their reactions are different tho cuz where Rick saw her holding the letter and felt a sense of fear and anxiety, Michonne sees him holding the letter and you can tell there’s a sense of relief.

Like she definitely seems a little surprised too with finding Rick right there with the letter, but also happy that whatever he did outside the walls led to the letter and not more suppressing or running from coping.

So the first thing Rick says is “Thank you.” And Rick is a real one for knowing he needs to thank her. And I love how Rick so often says thank you to Michonne in this series cuz Homeboy knows he’s with a queen and he’s grateful. 😊

Now, you know my extra self had to really reflect on what each line of dialogue meant in this scene, and to me Rick’s thank you was for her getting him to see the light slowly but surely, and for fighting for Carl and for himself, for being by his side this whole time, for loving him, and sharing with him, and for everything she is. 👌🏽😊

It was also thanking her for being patient as he took a little detour to where she knew he needed to be. But I think most of all, at the root, this is Rick telling her thank you for not giving up on me. 💯

I love how it’s so visible that a weight is taken off Michonne when he says this cuz it lets her know that he’s in a much better clearer space than before. She was carrying so much for the both of them, to the point that I was like Sis is overdue for a shoulder to cry on, but in hearing and seeing Rick like this, some of that load on her is lightened.

What I adore most about this moment is the way they both take this deep breath when he says this. They are legitimately one and so in sync. 😍🙌🏾

In seeing that Rick is in a clearer headspace she knows they’re making some progress and it’s a relief that he’s more present and stable cuz again, if he’s okay she’s okay and you see that in the synchronicity of their body language.

They both seem to just loosen up due to knowing/sensing that they’re a little more centered than earlier. It’s not that all their external problems are gone, but they’re centered with one another, which is enough to make them feel a lot better. 💯

I love that seeing he’s okay means the world to Michonne and in both of them taking this breath it reminds me of the moment in This Is Us where they all take a deep breath to take a step towards releasing the pain of their loss. As TIU said, when you don’t deal with your grief it’s like your holding your breath, so it’s big for R&M to be able to take this breath together.

The next thing he tells her is “I’m sorry” and I was very proud of Rick for telling her that.

Like hearing him apologize had me like…

And to me, the sorry was for the way he’s been running from her and the pain, for not being there for her the way she’s been there for him, for leaving and putting himself in harms way, and doing the opposite of what she and Carl wanted, for letting irrational Rick dictate his actions and not the Rick that knows to listen to her, and for distancing himself when he knows that’s not the way they are meant to be.

Rick knows he owes her better cuz in all this grief he has every right to wrestle with it but again, when it comes to Michonne he also has every responsibility to be there for her too, for so many reasons.

To name one, he wanted her in season four to continue this bond with Carl and she did and they became best friends so she opened her heart so fully to Carl and raised him with Rick, so Rick knows that as the husband he has to walk with her in this, and he’s apologizing for not doing that fully.

But Michonne stays out here teaching how to be a great wife cuz with so much love and compassion she tells him “You don’t have to be.”

I love this. 👏🏽😊 Cuz it’s not that she’s just passively letting Rick slide, she just understands that since they can’t reverse the past, all they can do is move forward, learn from it, and be better. And this is her way of showing she’s still here for him and they can be better together.

And I feel like in her telling him he doesn’t have to be sorry it’s not just her saying you don’t have to be sorry for what you did (cuz y’all Michonne and Rick are cut from the same cloth so she can understand what he did cuz she’s capable of going ham on the Saviors like that too) but it’s also saying you don’t have to be in a sorry state forever.

I appreciate that she chooses not to linger on this or reprimand him and make this cause a wedge. Also probably part of why she feels he doesn’t have to be sorry is because she knows his grieving journey has finally led him to the letter, which is where the healing process will begin.

She wants him to know he doesn’t have to be sorry for his grieving process cuz she knows this specific process very well considering she’s experienced it twice now. I love that she understands him so fully and so deeply and more than anyone else I think Rick has ever come across. 🙏🏽😊

Cuz low key someone who wasn’t his soul mate might not have had a response like “You don’t have to be” when he apologizes but more like “you better be”, but Rick’s got himself the best of the best who supports him through literally thick and thin. 👏🏽👸🏾

Rick seems to often be waiting for someone to tear him down or doubt him or be disappointed in him (probably cuz of his past) but she never does. 🙌🏾

Michonne always uplifts him and this moment was yet another way of saying “I’m still with you” and you know Sis always means it. 😌

So after she tells him this, Rick faces her and finally really looks at her with clear eyes again and it makes all the difference. He’s got himself the best wife and he knows it. Cuz she’s so compassionate and understanding and just genuinely wants the best for him without judgment. At the same time she’s not passive and naïve, she knows what’s up but she always chooses to see the man over the mistakes. #RealLove 👌🏽

And then comes the words we’ve been waiting for. Cuz Rick turns and faces Michonne and with the sweetest sincerity says, “I love you.”

Every. Last. Thing.

That “I love you” was a reminder and a promise that, as much as his whole world has changed, his love for her hasn’t. It’s still there and going strong. 💕

I appreciate that he turns to face her more head on when he says this cuz he wants it to be crystal clear that he means this. We’ve seen that when he’s not being totally honest he can’t really look at people, but here he looks right in her eyes cuz this is the 100% truth. 💯😊

I said in the last post how I was nervous that because this episode tried to make Rick’s word seem like it was questionable that they’d want this scene to be interpreted as questioning if Rick’s words are sincere or just manipulative, but all you have to do is see his face to know he’s serious.

He’s looking at her the way he looks at her when he’s in his right mind, which is like she’s his sun, moon, and stars. ☺️

And y’all, when he says this it came out so effortlessly that I had to pause cuz it was so clear that not only was this not the first time he’s said this but it was very clear that Homeboy has told her plenty of many of times. 👏🏽😊

Before this episode, I was thinking they’ve said it before but of course Andrew Lincoln found a way to deliver this line in a way where it sounds like this is something Rick says all the time. 😋

But it still feels really special and significant this time, because while I feel this totally isn’t their first, second, or even tenth time exchanging “I love you’s”, I think this may be their first time saying it since losing Carl, which is why it’s so meaningful and a milestone, cuz it’s showing they’re back to telling each other what’s always been true.

And after seeing this so many times, I’ve come to like the sort of melodic way he says it cuz there’s something so tender about it.

Also it’s sweet that he nods when he says it cuz this isn’t meant to be angsty, it’s supposed to be more like he’s saying; “you know that thing I tell you all the time? It’s still true” And it never stopped being true, he’s just now in a healthy spot to tell her again. 😌👌🏽

And once he says that, Michonne then completes this perfection by telling him, “I love you too”

And I gotta happy dance one more again.

But for real, her delivery of that line was beautiful. 😭 It was so sincere and meaningful while also sounding comfortable and certain.

And there’s definitely something emotional in her delivery because they’re expressing this sentiment post-Carl, but there’s also such a sense that this is so normal and natural for them.

Danai is so good at communicating so much in just a facial expression but also in just a tone of voice like this moment here. 👸🏾

And I love that Michonne got to say I love you to both Carl and Rick in 8B. They’re family. 😭💕

Now as I was first taking this all in, I was like why didn’t they show Michonne’s face as she said that (cuz y’all my extra self would have wanted a split screen so I could see both of their every move in real time lol 😂)

But what works about doing it this way is that it just goes to show that those three words are so normal for her to hear and say that it didn’t need this reveal of her reaction. She said it like she means it and like she knows he means it too cuz he’s said it fourteen thousand times before. 😋

And Richonne tones for the win, y’all. Like the way they speak to each other is always so loving and genuine and melts my heart. 🙌🏾

I actually have live footage of my heart when I heard them exchange I love you’s:

Lol so if my heart turned into Simone Biles, and I’ve only been waiting like two years for this, I can only imagine how gratifying this moment must’ve been for those that had been waiting for this since season 3 and 4.

Like y’all have been going strong for this couple for years and that allowed people like me to jump on board down the line to see what’s always been there between them. So I was celebrating not just for me but for y’all who believed this day would come as early as the moment R&M laid eyes on each other. 😊 And y’all were so right. Won’t He Do It! 🙌 🏾😋

And I love that this moment had so many of us like...

So while I still would have loved to see Michonne’s reaction, I do love that we get to see Rick’s reaction to her.

Rick nods when she tells him, cuz she’s told him this plenty of many of times too. Amen. 🙌🏾☺️

And y’all I already adored this scene and watched it a ton of times lol, but I never noticed, until I saw it pointed out recently, that Rick actually subtly sheds a tear when she tells him she loves him.

And seeing that has me even more emotional than I already was. 😭

It makes this moment even more moving because even tho these “I love you’s” are not some new profession for them, it still means the world to them. 😊

And I think for Rick to hear his woman so genuinely express that she loves him too, it moves him in this way because he’s reminded yet again that he still has extremely valuable love left in his life.

After losing Carl, he’d been convincing himself that he’s a failure. But Michonne is here and showing him that he’s still loved, and seen, and cared about, and forgiven, and believed in, and that hits home for Rick and makes him really grateful. 😊

Y’all we really are so blessed that this relationship is in such capable hands with these actors. They’re so skilled at making these moments feel so authentic and personal because they’re characters are so lived in and it really does feel like we’re getting just a peek into the deep closeness and intimacy R&M have in everyday life. It makes you feel like it’s too personal to have an audience almost, but it’s perfect. 😌👌🏽

Like every night since 6x10, R&M get ready to go to bed in a room they share and this is how they talk, except more weighted this time given the circumstances.

I appreciate that they’re also so in tune with the characters so they knew to play this moment as meaningful but also casual because it’s a sentiment often expressed between them. They don’t just know they love each other, they clearly tell each other often too. ☺️

8x01, 7x16, 7x12, 7x10, 7x09, 7x08, 7x05, 7x04, 6x11, and even as early as the day they went canon in 6x10; those are all the episodes where I love you’s could totally have been exchanged. Here for it. 😋

And y’all I have to have my reoccurring epiphany that this is Rick and Michonne. The Rick and Michonne that met at that fence, and constantly found themselves staring each other down when they were just strangers in season 3.

The Rick and Michonne who were glad to see each other at the gate in season 4. The Rick and Michonne who knew the rules had changed for them in season 5. The Rick and Michonne who just needed a pair of mints to finally embrace the fact that they were in love in season 6. And now we’re here. It’s a blessing. 🙌🏾🎉

I love thinking about any Richonne scene prior, especially pre-canon, and then thinking about this glorious “I love you” scene following it. Cuz y’all these two have been expressing “I love you’s” to each other in so many different ways for the longest. And it’s just so great to get crystal clear undeniable confirmation that their journey, starting way back in season, 3 was about these two falling in love and now being this strong couple in love. 🙌🏾😌

My favorite is thinking about their moment in the season three finale which parallels this one. In both scenes Rick apologizes and she’s understanding, but in s3 he tells her that it “must’ve been something else” that led him to bring her in. And now in s8 we can pretty much confirm that the “something else” was cuz Homeboy was falling in love. 🙌🏾🎉

Y’all there’s just no denying that what these two have is the real deal. It’s crazy tho cuz even now, with the literal ILYs having been said, there’s people who still completely overlook their relationship or “don’t see the chemistry” or don’t get that Michonne and Rick are a soul mate package deal relationship, which just confirms that…

And again, I acknowledge that everyone absolutely has a right to their opinion on it. 👌🏽 But imho, if people can’t see that Rick and Michonne’s relationship is a soul mate relationship now, then it’s cuz they don’t want to see it since in every scene Rick and Michonne are in the “I love you” is evident.

Whether it’s in action or in different words, and now in those exact special three words. They are in love. And they are going to stay in love til the end. 💯

So to the people who specifically hate on them, I low key feel like this scene was also a way to say…

But regardless of who’s on board, Richonne only gets stronger and stronger and better and better, so it’s all good.

And y’all the scene doesn’t just end with the I love you’s! There’s more gold to witness. 🙌🏾

Cuz after they share these wonderful words, Michonne goes to Rick and reaches for him cuz he can finally receive it, in fact he needs that.

The way he looks down before she walks over, I feel like Rick doesn’t think she’s about to kiss him, probably cuz he still doesn’t think he deserves that.

But again, Michonne quiets those doubts in him and gives him the love and connection they both need and y’all it’s beyond precious. 🙌🏾

Like this reminded me of one of Richonne’s most life-giving moments with the Kiss of Life in 7x05, in the way Michonne reaches for him and reminds him why he’s got a bomb ride or die wife. 👸🏾

I love that they’re able to share this kiss and just be completely enraptured in this moment. And you can tell they’ve both been wanting to connect this way for a while. 😊

And that mirror showing us all the angles. 👌🏽That mirror is a Richonner and I’m here for it. 😋

And then the looks they share tho…like y’all this love goes deep. ☺️And it’s great how Richonne can’t help but do everything passionately when they’re with each other. 👏🏽

And then the forehead touch, making them like a perfect heart, is such a beautiful establishment of the strong unit they are and the way they lean on each other and are magnetically connected. This right here is unbreakable. 😌💯

To see them both just be fully locked into this moment and not fight the connection their meant to have is so refreshing. 🙌🏾😊 #magnets

And seeing them in front of this whole mirror is def meant to contrast the broken mirror Rick was in at the bar. In the broken mirror he was alone and troubled, but here he is focused and with the woman that’s his rock so he’s much more whole.

Even during their distance in 8x13, I knew we wouldn’t have to wait long until they were back in each other’s arms, and just an episode later they’re right back where they’re meant to be. 👌🏽

So then, still so close and connected, they both look over at this letter and it’s kind of like these two are looking at Carl in a way.

And it’s deep cuz Carl really was their North Star and such a driving force for these two as individuals. But he still is their North Star because he helped to give them each other, which is how they are able to get through this. 😭

Rick lifts the letter to imply he’s ready to take her words to heart and read it. And Michonne walks away cuz she wants to allow him time to fully take this in on his own.

Before leaving, she looks at him in a way that says; alright it’s time to take this leap, no more running and once you jump I’ll be right there with you. 👌🏽😊

And having gotten his strength from his everything, he’s able to sit and finally let Carl speak to him one last time, cuz I think part of him knows now that Carl won’t end with that letter.

Like Glenn said; the dead live on in the living. So Carl lives on in Judith and in him and in the woman he’s in love with especially, Michonne. So long as they have each other and love each other, they’ll never lose Carl. 😌

Before Rick reads the letter, he looks up and it’s like he’s trying to look up towards Carl cuz now the roles are switched and Rick has to look up to his son.

This episode concludes with Rick reading the letter and emotionally taking in the words. It’s clear this whole scene is not to suggest that Rick is continuing to be jaded, but to show he’s rising above that unhealthy space.

He’s open to the letter, he’s opening up to Michonne again and focusing on what he loves over what he hates, cuz real Rick is returning.

Y’all love covers a multitude of sins and, while TWD does not get a pass for all the baffling dumb decisions made this season, those “I love you’s” def sustained me for a good while lol.

That day was Easter, it was I Love You’s, it was a good celebratory day.👌🏽😊

And this special moment between Rick and Michonne was such a beautiful way to end the episode, having that moment be the final thing. It just goes to show how Richonne only get stronger and closer through adversity. They endure things that should break them, but together they’re stronger than all of it and they always find their way back to each other.

So I truly adore this scene for giving us the golden “I love you’s” and for showing us how lovingly and authentically they’ve found their way back to each other after the hardest adversity yet. And as long as they have each other they’ll thrive, because they are really and truly soul mates. 💯☺️

Rick and Michonne need each other, y’all. And they’re perfect together. And most importantly, they love each other.👌🏽😌🎉🙌🏾

gif sources: michonnegrimes gekari danaigurirasource spideyys andy-clutterbuck supagirl ricksmichonne

#richonne #richonne family #richonne fandom #michonne #rick grimes #michonne grimes #s8 #8.14 #ILY"s!!!!!#at last #Won't He Do it #Yes He Will #thank you so much for reading!#Reveling/Rejoicing in Richonne

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luvlycalix · 4 years ago

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i’m starting to like get scared to talk about myself here and how i’m doing cuz it’s stupid of me to feel sry for myself that i’m not losing any weight cuz i’m not doing it right. i’m doing better with motivation like mentally and i have my ways to stay away from food. it’s just annoying. my mentality in other ways like my mentality not involving my ed is getting a lot better in general. i still internally scream cry when i go back for seconds or someone points out my round face or says “it’s just ur face shape”. but other than that I feel oddly good. like i’ve been meditating and getting into a good headspace. but i’ve been kinda worried about losing weight. i don’t wanna look my boobs or my ass. i’m scared that’s what’s gonna happen and I’ve always been scared of that but I’m scared of it now more than ever cuz i’ve been rly pushing myself with restricting and avoiding eating and working out. idk. whatever happens happens ig. it’s not the biggest deal to have small boobs or a small but, Kendall Jenner, zendaya, ariana, they all r known for being super skinny and they don’t have the biggest features but everyone loves them right....why cant everyone love me.

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whateverisbeautiful · 7 years ago

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Richonne in Retrospect

#35: The Authority (5x13)

Rick and Michonne are compatible in a whole lot of ways and both of them have a certain authority about them. And in their new job positions we get to see how they’re both literal authority figures in the community as well as how they have a certain healthy authority in each other’s lives as well.

The first Richonne moment of 5x13 is when R&M discuss why they might have been given these authoritative roles.

The scene starts with Michonne alone in her room and she’s trying to make the most of this cop outfit and I support her wanting to improve this look.

And then, y’all, can we talk about Rick’s reaction to Michonne in this scene?

Like y’all what is this adorableness right here? 😋 It’s everything and I’m glad that the actors did stuff like this for their characters, in order to keep building on the evolution of Rick and Michonne’s chemistry, despite a trifling storyline that was attempting to infringe on it.

It’s these little moments that helped keep Richonne on the horizon cuz I feel like it’s hard to interpret this whole raised eyebrow reaction as anything other than the fact that Rick was taking note of the Queen lol. And it’s not even like she was in some fancy outfit or anything, but more so Rick seems to be taken by her regardless, cuz Homeboy is always taken by her.

His reaction feels similar to hers over the clean shaven face. And it’s cute that, similar to Rick’s nervousness with revealing his clean shaven face, Michonne seems a little nervous for this reveal too.

(Also I briefly mentioned this before, but I love that by this point they’ve picked their own houses and clearly the magnets stuck together.)

Rick says, “I don’t know if this is some kind of play. Handing authority to strangers.” And I appreciate that he’s willing to be transparent with her about still having some doubts, despite the fact that he “signed the papers” in taking this job.

And then Michonne humorously brings up how it’s really just “the authority to break up fist fights”

Rick makes the good point that if it was just that Deanna would have given one of those uniforms to Daryl.

To me, that means that Rick knows there’s probably something deeper that made Deanna pick him and Michonne specifically. Like there’s some unique quality in both of them that either Deanna appreciates or wants to control.

Michonne smiles and says, “I don’t know if it’s for us or for them” and then she wisely suggests, “Or maybe Deanna’s trying to get rid of ‘us and them’”

And can I just note that Homeboy has all eyes on her during this conversation. I love that he is focused whenever she talks. 😋

Like the way Rick is standing and looking at her, makes his feelings for her pretty apparent cuz you can just visibly see how much he likes her and cares about her. ☺️

It’s also interesting that during this time Rick is keeping a secret from her about those guns. But just in his demeanor in this scene it’s clear he believes he’s keeping this secret to protect her rather than to leave her out. Cuz I know he care about the fact that Michonne really wants this place to work for her and so that’s a big reason he keeps the plan with Carol and Daryl under wraps.

I still don’t support keeping this little gun scheme from Michonne tho. But at least it led to my favorite season 5 scene with the “I’m still with you” moment. 👏🏽

But back to this scene, Homegirl stay strategizing, cuz then she’s brings up that maybe this is all a play to show them around in those jackets. She laments how that would be smart and she says Deanna seems smart. Deanna sensed Richonne so yep, she is smart. 💯😋

Michonne knows that play would be a clever tactic cuz she knows her and Rick are the baddest of the bunch, so if they’re in those jackets adhering to Deanna’s rules, it shows that Deanna was able to control two of the strongest people.

Rick says, “Smart for then or smart for now?” and Michonne wisely reminds him of the thing he most needs reminded of, when she says “This is now.”

I feel like he really needed that wake-up call because he seems to be very much stuck in the past, be it the trauma of the Terminus encounter or losing Lori without closure.

And, when he’s not living in the past, he’s on edge for what might be around the corner and what happens next so that’s all apart of what’s making him lose it.

He needs someone to help him see that this is now and it’s okay to be in the present moment, and of course Michonne is the one to help him see that.

Like the way Rick reacts when she says that, you can tell he needed to hear that cuz when Michonne says it, you see it sort of snap Rick out of it for a second and I love how he allows her words to have so much authority in his life and really resonate with him.

Deanna has a meeting with Rick, Michonne and Maggie. And R&M just look like a little power couple in their matching windbreakers lol. 😋 Also I love that Rick now has a wife that could be on the force with him. 👏🏽

And Deanna explains that they “protect and serve” and I was like ain’t that the truth. She really can read people, cuz that’s what R&M do all the time; protect and serve. 👌🏽💯

She tells them what the job entails and then she says, “People will listen to you.” And I love that Michonne says, “Because we’re wearing wind breakers?” lol. Talk about it, sis. 😂

It’s funny that as Deanna is talking about her big goals of how one day civilization will be functioning and up and running again, Rick is clearly distracted. I was like “Deanna, just tell Michonne to say it and he’ll pay attention.” 😋

And then when Deanna notices him looking out the window she asks if her vision sounds like “pie in the sky” and Maggie says no and then Michonne says no and then Rick’s like “I guess I have to go with the pattern” so he says “no” too lol. 😂

And then, true to his cop DNA, he’s ready to get on to the more pressing issues when he says, “Can we talk security?” cuz before you can have a whole government and industry and commerce, he knows they first need to make sure this place is even as secure as it seems.

It’s cool that Michonne gets to see a glimpse of Rick in his element of his past life as he talks security and Deanna was definitely right that this is still who he is cuz he falls back into this police role pretty naturally.

When they’re walking through ASZ, Sasha approaches and basically asks to be the ‪24/7‬ lookout to which I was like “y’all that’s a cry for help”. And when they learn that there’s currently no lookouts in the tower, both Rick and Michonne are not having that.

I love that, in both of them expressing why they need a lookout, we get to see firsthand why Deanna made the right choice giving the two of them this job.

...And then there’s this welcome party. 😒

I mentioned that there would be some gif journeys. And gif journeys tend to come out when I feel the most tried lol. And the events of this party all the way tried it, especially once my eyes were open to all the Richonne build up prior to this.

And while I’m over it now, I gotta take you on a little journey of how much I was not feeling this thing lol.

So first of all; The whole time Rick is with this woman at this party I was legit watching like…

The. whole. time. lol And the little Petty Betty in me was like “It’s interesting that this episode is called “Forget” cuz Rick seems to have forgotten a couple things, the main one being that he has his literal soul mate living under the same roof as him and yet he’s getting caught up with this other chick.” 🙄

This woman says, “We all lost things. But then we got something back. It isn’t enough. But it’s something.” And I feel like that was pretty much Rick’s thinking with her, like “this isn’t enough to reconcile everything I’m feeling but maybe it’s something.” But it’s really nothing.

To me the most telling thing in the whole Jessie storyline is Rick’s words to Daryl in 5x12 when he says, “Lori and Me, we used to drive through neighborhoods like this. Thinking one day…” and then Daryl says “Well here we are.”

That is at the foundation of the entire thing. It was all about Rick being around some things that reminded him of his wife and now that he’s here he’s trying to get a “second chance” to save Lori in a sense, by trying to save this new lady. So when it comes to Jessie, as you all already know...

Like in 5x12 when Rick, suffering from PTSD, runs to look for Carl and Judith he runs into that sculpture and when talking to Jessie afterwards he straight up tells her, “I was in the middle of losing my mind.” And when he said that I was like...

Like that’s just more proof that he’s not in the best headspace during this whole arc and he even knows it himself.

And then at this party that little kid of hers, Sam, runs to tell her there’s no more cookies and Rick playfully says he knows the cookie maker and she’s a good friend and all that, and I was just like…

Cuz Michonne is out there on the porch by herself and he’s over here trying to be cute lol. Not here for it.

Sam gives Rick a stamp and his mom says, “See now you’re officially one of us” and I was like…

So I’m already annoyed that Rick is out here blurring the lines with this married woman. And then I see that Michonne’s at this party looking sad and alone in a sad dress so then I’m even more salty lol.

Like I wanted to be on that porch just staring down Rick from the window like...

But fr, I get so sad to see Michonne standing outside by herself at the party. It’s weird to me too that they never show Rick and Michonne interacting at this party but I think they had to keep them separate for this Jessie arc to really work.

Otherwise Rick and this chick would make even less sense cuz when you see the way R&M are together it would be real hard to still try and suggest Rick has feelings for someone else.

While it was strange to never really see Rick and Michonne acknowledge her and that situation, I’m kind of glad Michonne wasn’t put too in the mix of that storyline so that she didn’t have to deal with that mess.

Like I notice that aside from Carol, really no one was shown to be that aware of Rick’s pursuit of this lady but I feel it also just further emphasizes how not serious his feelings were for her.

I’m glad that at least Abraham comes out to talk to Michonne. When he notices the little plastic sword she’s holding and he jokes “You packing different steel now?”

And Abe is actually making some deep statements when he says, “You live by it, die by it.” And then he says how you pray you don’t forget how to use it but also don’t ever have to use it and it’s on your back even when it’s off. I was like alright Abe feels like preaching to somebody. 😂👏🏽

And then Michonne looks over at him and asks how much he’s had to drink and they share a laugh which is sweet.

Abe tells her he’s come to realize things have actually worked well for him and then he asks her, “How about you? What have you done?” and then she says “I put on this dress.” which I believe is her suggesting the dress is sort of her way of attempting to get reacclimated to normal life.

And Abe responds by saying, “Try again.” I still don’t know exactly what he meant by it. Maybe one of y’all can break it down for me. Like I know it wasn’t in a Tim Gunn way of critiquing the fashion choice lol. Even tho low key when he says that for some reason I always hear it like he’s saying...

But, if I had to guess, I think he just means she’s taken bigger steps forward than she realizes and so she’s gotta know she’s done more than just put on a dress.

Inside the house, Rick tells Jessie how Judith and Carl are why he’s still here which made me really sad cuz now part of why he’s still here is about to be taken away when the show returns. 😭

And y’all, I would talk about what happens next in this interaction but you already know and I had to just skip it cuz I can’t lol. Like, again, for most of their moments this was my actual reaction…

All there is to say about it is that it’s just more proof that Rick was not in a good head space at this time.

In a later scene, when Rick’s walking in ASZ he sees Jessie with her husband and they both put up their hands to show their little “A” stamp to which I was like...

Cuz the lines just stayed blurred and sketchy with them.

But it really gets confirmed that Rick is not in the best headspace when he puts his hand on his gun as he watches Jessie and Pete walk away. Like this is before Rick knows about the abuse I think, so for Homeboy to even quickly contemplate taking out her husband in broad daylight just shows that he’s feeling real off.

Plus he goes to a wall and listens to the walker on the other side, which is actually a cool shot and symbol, but again, he’s not all there rn.

During this whole arc of Rick’s, I just wanted Iyanla to come along and give Rick a warm hug and be like...

In 5x14, Rick’s all adamant to help with that owl situation and people have to tell him it’s just an owl but for him it’s a way to be useful and save something which is his m.o..

When he’s talking with her about the owl and trying to be funny asking if she has any enemies or people who hate owls, I was just like...

As frustrating as Rick’s behavior is, there’s also this feeling of sadness for him cuz at the root you can see that all this is coming from a place of trying to fix something that he can’t go back and fix.

And again, it’s implied that all this has to do with Lori when later Rick and Pete talk and Pete brings up how Rick lost his wife and how they’ve lost things and some things they’re just fighting really hard to hold on to. Which is exactly what Rick is doing.

(Side note: It makes me mad too cuz you can sees Michonne’s katanna in the back of this exchange with Rick and Pete and I was like Rick, bruh look over there at that sword and remember who you’re supposed to be with.)

And when Pete leaves, there’s a shot emphasizing Rick’s wedding ring to yet again confirm that this whole thing is about Lori.

And then in 5x15, we see Michonne sad in her room when she finds one of Noah’s old shirts after he’s passed.

It’s implied a couple times that clearly losing Noah was tough on her so I can’t even imagine how she’s supposed to go on when she loses Carl. 😥 Which is insane to even write out cuz I still can’t believe it’s actually come to this. 😭

Rosita tells Michonne that Sasha hasn’t been seen so they go look for her. As they walk, Rosita brings up how Michonne seems screwed up cuz they found something in ASZ and Michonne tells her “Noah’s dead. And I think. I just feel like I was asleep in there.” And she brings up how she doesn’t want to forget, what this world is.

It’s telling that she felt asleep in there. I think this ASZ move was a tough adjustment for Rick and Michonne, and a lot of that is because they had things trying to keep them apart, like Rick’s secret with Carol and Daryl and the trifling storyline with the married woman. And see when you’re magnets, that distance is bound to not sit right with them.

And then when we get this scene where they find Sasha on a walker rampage, Michonne starts recalling who she was when she was slaying walkers outside these walls and joins Sasha in shooting the walkers. And when Sasha lets her know she’s got it, Michonne lets her know this isn’t for her.

Michonne helps get a walker off of Sasha to Sasha’s frustration. She gets up and points at Michonne and says, “You. You can’t do anything. It worked out for you. Don’t you see that? You can’t help me.”

Y’all, this moment and the line “it worked out for you” has always been super interesting to me.

What I think Sasha’s words mean is, not just that they got to go to ASZ like Michonne wanted, but that Sasha’s seen Michonne with Rick and the kids and she knows Michonne has a full on family now, whereas Sasha’s family was stripped away pretty quickly after each other with Bob and Tyreese.

Think about all the public Richonne bubble moments Rick and Michonne would have, with all TF around. Knowing that, it would make sense for Sasha to feel it worked out for Michonne cuz she sees the family unit she’s now apart of with Rick and his kids.

(Side note: Sonequa’s acting when she talks about Noah tho. A1! Sis is holding it down in this scene. 👏🏽 )

And it’s also interesting to see Michonne’s reponse to Sasha saying this. Like she seems like this really causes her to think about what Sasha means.

When Rick returns to the house after confronting Jessie about the abuse, he tells Jessie he doesn’t want her to die and he can protect her and her kids and keep them safe. I sound like a broken record but just to hit the point all the way home; this undoubtedly proves that Rick was trying to get a second chance at what he feels he couldn’t do with Lori.

He tells her all you have to do is “say yes” which low key made me like the title of 7x12 a little less. Just 1% less. 😂

And then as you know the episode ends with Rick and Pete fighting and flying out of a window and then Rick going in on the Alexandirans until Michonne comes to his rescue like a real one.

This whole storyline was not exactly Rick’s shining moment, and it was definitely a mixture of PTSD and also what he says in 5x16 that sums it up best...

But what’s great is that even in this time that wasn’t Rick’s finest hour, Michonne was there for him and saw him through it.

And that about covers the remainder of season 5. (sorry this post was so long!) And there’s so much good stuff in 5x16 that I already reveled in. Particularly what could be considered the GOAT Richonne pre-canon scene...

But before I make this post any longer by reveling in this scene all over, I’ll just quickly reiterate that this scene is every last thing, y’all. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

I appreciate that season 5 ends with Rick and Michonne united and, even tho it would still be a few more episodes, I’m glad that season six is the season where they fully see what’s always been in front of them. 👌🏽😊

#richonne #richonne fandom #richonne family #michonne #rick grimes #twd #the walking dead #michonne grimes #s5 #5x13 #5x15 #5x16 #not my gifs #5.14

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