#look forward to the video of how dramatic he had to be for soooo long to get them to throw it up the gesturing!!😂😂

[statementlou]

Louis posing dramatically with the giant Donny Rovers flag he got from the front row!!

[reverie-starlight]

{PR DAY ~ sakusa kiyoomi}

MSBY manager!reader my beloved <3

it’s PR Day for the jackals and you, their manager, have the day off. so why is your boyfriend trying so hard to convince you to go with him?

gn!reader, fluff, an attempt at humor, atsumu slander (as much as it pains me, it comes with the territory of writing a fic like this 😔) suggestive in some parts. not nsfw at all, but explicit language is used and one conversation surrounds that topic, so read at your own risk <3 also, intentional tense-switch in the beginning!!! and just like the first part, it’s not explicitly mentioned, but reader and atsumu have known each other since high school.

part 1 of the mini-series

managing MSBY came with its ups and downs.

on one hand, you wouldn’t have met your boyfriend if it weren’t for this job. and you've never laughed as hard as you have been these past three years with coworkers before meeting the current core line up of the jackals.

but on the other? you had three massive fully grown children under your care. four, technically, if they managed to annoy sakusa enough that he stoops to their level of childishness.

which was unfortunately very often.

…

nearly every week.

…

fine, basically everyday.

and ever since your relationship was revealed to the team nearly a year ago, the “trouble trio” had been behaving exactly like you expected them to. the whole team was slightly insufferable about it, sure, but atsumu, hinata and bokuto really took it too the next level.

so obviously you really valued your days off.

and today was the first day off you’ve had in months. you refused to take off days during the busiest weeks of the season, but today was a PR day.

interviews, promotional videos for the official social media accounts, a livestream or two- all things you were more than happy to leave in the hands of the team’s PR and social media managers.

the birds were singing, the sunlight was streaming through the bedroom window and a cool breeze could be felt against your skin. the day was calm and you were so excited to relax and do all the things you had planned.

but of course, your hopes are just that.

you see your boyfriend standing in the doorway of your bedroom, looking like he wants to say something. your heart lurches into your throat.

“soooo,” he starts, not looking directly at you as he moves to the bed and looks at his laid out clothes. you’re already shaking your head before he can say anything else. he ignores this and proceeds to betray you. “if you wanted to tag along today, you could or whatever.”

he’s shameless. he knows how much you’ve been looking forward to today.

“kiyoomi. love of my life. my darling. what the fuck?”

he lets out a snort and looks down at you semi-pleadingly- a rare sight. “I’ll buy you coffee on the way there.”

oh, he’s bargaining? you smirk. “aww, baby,” you stand up and make your way over to him, dramatically twirling and falling back into him with the back of your hand touching your forehead and the other pressed to your chest. “you just can’t bear to be apart from me, can you?”

the pleading look in his eye fades and he gives you a disgusted look you know he doesn’t mean. his arms stay wrapped around you so you don’t fall. “you wish.”

you shrug and move back to your chair, finishing up your morning routine. “hmm I guess I’ll stay here then.”

you enjoy the silence for a moment before he sighs. “fine, two coffees.”

a loud laugh leaves your mouth when he says that. your boyfriend would never put this performance on for anyone else. it was as close to begging as you’d ever get from sakusa kiyoomi.

you shake your head and sigh. “my love, you know I’ve been looking forward to my day off for so long. why are you so insistent about me going with you?”

suddenly he’s behind your chair and leaning down so his breath tickles your ear. “coffee and lunch and maybe when we get back I could be convinced to try that thing you were talking about…” the words are backed up by a kiss to your jaw and some pointed eye contact through the mirror.

you widen your eyes and search his expression for any trace of a lie.

none.

you cannot believe you’re letting him convince you into this, but the offer is far too good to pass up.

you pretend to mull it over, then meet his eyes in the mirror again. “make sure the trouble trio don’t try to coerce me into working and we have a deal.”

“well of course, I was going to yell at them if they tried anything like that anyway.”

“perfect, then let’s seal it with a kiss.”

“only a kiss, baby, I feel your hands wandering.” he pecks your lips quickly and pulls away before you can deepen it.

you pout. “can you blame me? you’ve got me all excited now.”

he shakes his head fondly and straightens up, moving to put the shirt his stylist had insisted upon for the upcoming interviews. you had to hand it to her- she knew exactly what she was doing.

you watch him with hawk eyes and he just turns his head to look at you in amusement. “stop staring at me and get ready, you perv, we have to leave soon.”

as soon as you step into the building where all the other jackals are, you’re bombarded with confused greetings.

“hey, I thought it was your day off?”

“ayy, manager’s here! good to see ya.”

“what are you doing here? you weren’t scheduled for today, were you?”

you sigh and sip your coffee, letting go of sakusa’s hand as you speak to the coach. “no, I wasn’t. I was kidnapped and brought here by one of your wing spikers.”

he chuckles and glances over at your boyfriend, who is looking up at the ceiling and avoiding eye contact. “I see. well, if anyone tries to get you to work today, just let me know and I’ll help sakusa put them in their places.”

you smile kindly. “thank you, sir, I appreciate it.”

as soon as he walks away, you’re surrounded by the three people you wanted to see least today.

a long sigh leaves your lips as atsumu, hinata and bokuto stare at you in wonder.

“just get it over with,” you grumble.

“how much do ya wanna bet he promised something outrageous?” atsumu.

“what, like an all expenses paid vacation?” hinata.

“no, it’s omi-omi, it wouldn’t make sense for him to take time off in the middle of game season.”

you roll your eyes at their back and forth and glance over at the man in question, who appears to be glowering. you can almost picture the scowl underneath his mask. “you’re all idiots,” he states.

“hey! I haven’t even said anything yet!” bokuto protests.

“yes, but I can practically hear the gears in your brain grinding.”

“I’ll bet it’s a sex thing,” atsumu interrupts just as bokuto is about to defend himself.

you all freeze and stare at him.

your boyfriend, deadly calm, says “miya, I will skin you alive.”

the blonde, who absolutely loves getting a rise out of sakusa, just smirks. “oh, so I’m right then?” he turns to you and slings an arm over your shoulder. “tell me, dear manager, what exactly did he have to agree to in order to get ya to show up on your day off?”

you flick his forehead and shake your head disapprovingly. “none of your business, you freak. just 'cause your dating life isn’t going too well right now doesn’t mean you can pry into mine. download tinder or something if you’re that bored.”

bokuto and hinata snicker at that, but straighten up quickly when he shoots them a glare. suddenly, meian stalks up behind the three of them and clears his throat.

“if you’re all done terrorizing our manager, our social media team is ready for us now. hurry up.” he nods at you with an apologetic smile and drags atsumu away from you. “sakusa, you too. we’ve been waiting for a while now.”

as soon as his teammates walk away and he’s sure they’re not watching him, he slumps a bit and you notice the tips of his ears have gone red. you smile at him in amusement and pat his cheek, the action only slightly awkward due to his mask.

“aw lighten up, kiyoomi, I’m used to dealing with atsumu by now. just ignore him, he wouldn’t dream of bringing that up again if he knows what’s good for him.”

he sighs and drops his shoulders, relief washing over him now that he knows you’re not regretting your decision to come with him. he slips off his mask and presses a quick kiss to your lips. “alright. I love you, just enjoy the show.”

you take his mask and walk with him to the rest of the group so that they can start with the promotional videos.

it’s fun to watch, honestly, because the team’s dynamic does work well for the cameras. they’re not even playing anything up.

you sit through the promo videos they need to film for upcoming games, the silly one-off fluff questions and the fan asks for their instagram page before they’re allowed a break.

sakusa stalks over to you with a small scowl and you smile. “you’re doing great, handsome.”

his expression softens a bit and he offers you a kiss on the forehead. “thank you, darling. care for some lunch?”

you nod and pull him out the door before a certain trio can invite themselves to the impromptu lunch date.

you walk in comfortable silence towards the building’s food court before something pops into your mind. “kiyoomi, you never answered my question from earlier.”

he hums in acknowledgment. “and what might that be?”

“why were you so insistent on me joining you today?”

he doesn’t answer for a moment, but you wait patiently. you know he’s not ignoring you.

finally he sighs and squeezes your hand. “I feel like we haven’t been spending much time together lately outside of work… and I was hoping that by bringing you with me today we’d be able to have at least some time together…” his voice is low, but he’s not shy about it.

you fiddle with the chain around your neck, one he bought for you a while back. "that's very sweet of you, kiyo."

"and..." he hesitates a bit, but you squeeze his hand in return to encourage him. "I feel more relaxed in front of the cameras when you're there."

you melt a little bit. "I'm happy I make you feel that way, kiyoomi. thank you for kidnapping me on my day off, I suppose."

he snorts and you smile. you're about to lean in to pull his mask down for a kiss, but you're interrupted. of course.

"hey, hey, hey! there you guys are! we saw you leaving so figured we'd get lunch with you!"

you honestly don't think you could ever be mad at bokuto, but he is seriously testing your patience right now. not far behind him are atsumu and hinata, one looking smug and the other a bit sheepish. one of them probably brought up your departure to bokuto, either on purpose or accidentally you'd never know.

you sigh and pat sakusa on the back. "yeah, come on. you're all paying for your own, though."

you both ignore the whines of the fully grown children behind you and continue walking hand in hand.

~~~~

BONUS:

"so this question is directed at sakusa..." atsumu reads the question silently and the team watches as he holds back a laugh.

you watch as your boyfriend narrows his eyes at the blonde in front of him and you sigh. things had been going so well up until now.

it’s past lunch break now, and their social media manager had just given them a box full of printed out tweets with fan questions to answer. she snickers to herself as if she knows which question it is and looks pointedly at you from behind the phone she’s recording on.

you blink in confusion, but everything is made clear when atsumu opens his mouth again.

“omi-omi, user @/kiyosdear wants to know if you’re single, or if you’re in need of a dog, because they’re more than willing to bark.”

the social media manager giggles, as does the rest of the team. you feel your eye twitch a bit, but you’re easily able to shove down any possession you feel in the moment.

it’s obviously impossible to ignore so many people vying for his attention all the time, but sometimes it could be a little funny to see how flustered your boyfriend could become from the unwanted attention.

you smile at the small scowl that forms. “no thank you. I’d want nothing less.”

atsumu snorts at his curt answer and hands the box to him. sakusa picks out a question and reads it to himself before blushing furiously and turning his face away from the camera. you watch curiously as meian looks over his shoulder to see what could have garnered that reaction from him and his eyes trail to you amusedly.

the social media manager looks like she’s having a field day, zooming in on sakusa’s red face for a moment. it’s not often something flusters him that badly after all. she’ll milk it for all it’s worth.

the captain pries the paper out of your boyfriend’s hand and reads it out loud.

“@/msby_luvr asks, yo @/sakusakiyoomi, is your team's manager single? totally unrelated, @/msbymanager, are you free on thursday?"”

it’s not exactly a secret to the public that there’s something going on between you two, they just don’t know what that something is.

of course neither of you ever confirm or deny anything, but you imagine being asked outright like that is what caught him off guard.

the camera cuts to you, “offstage” laughing at the question and shaking your head a little in amusement.

or maybe he’s not shy, but rather jealous?

that’s kind of sweet.

regardless, you speak up for him, knowing he wouldn't answer. "I am not single, but thanks for asking."

the camera pans back to the team, just in time to catch the tail end of atsumu clapping your boyfriend on the shoulder.

sakusa gives you a small smile, clearly relieved you took over for him, and goes back to focusing on the interview.

hinata, the poor thing, reads the next question. “oh boy… @/msbymanager asks, sakusa and atsumu rivals to lovers arc when?”

you cackle as both men whip their heads in your direction, betrayal and incredulity on their faces.

raising your hands, you said to them “in my defence, I was still miffed about being dragged here on my day off when I sent it in!”

atsumu loudly refuted the question and the jeers from his teammates, but that was all drowned out by the look your boyfriend sent your way.

you sighed. you were really in for it later.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’ll 100% be doing more MSBY manager!reader. and I’ll do more PR scenarios as well, bc as much fun as this was to write, it didn’t have as much as I wanted to include. but I’ll have to do more research. thank you for reading!! and happy birthday sakusa <3

tags: @dira333 (ty for inspiring me to turn it into a mini-series) @emmyrosee (Ik you love Sakusa and you wanted the WIP for this a long time ago)

[stattic-writes]

Stream

https://statticscribbles.tumblr.com/post/639099629845233664/masterlist

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[bard-llama]

That Wild Blue Yonder Ch 3

Read on AO3

First Chapter | Previous Chapter

When Jaskier woke, it was dark outside and he felt groggy in that weird way where he wasn’t really tired anymore, but he also didn’t feel awake. He yawned expansively and rolled himself out of bed. After a shower and some breakfast, he felt a lot more alive, but he was also kind of convinced he’d had a really intense dream.

This wasn’t Narnia. Wardrobes didn’t just lead to magical worlds.

But it wouldn’t hurt to check, right?

Jaskier hummed to himself as he leisurely walked down the corridors of the somehow-still-hot castle. Wasn’t stone supposed to insulate? Why was it still so muggy and hot inside?

Well, Jaskier told himself, if it was real and there was a magic world through the closet, then he could go somewhere nice and cool. He skipped around the corner and stopped abruptly in front of the stairs he’d fallen down before. He preferred not to repeat that bit of the dream/potential cool new reality. His shoulders ached with the memory of busting through the wooden wardrobe door.

Which was why the sight in front of him was so disappointing. The wardrobe was there, but the door looked good as – well, not new, because the whole thing looked really, really old, but it wasn’t broken. If it was real, the door should have been broken.

Mood suddenly sullen, Jaskier pulled the door open with more force than necessary. He took a deep breath and then pushed the hangers aside.

It was real. He felt like he might cry at the sight of the stone castle on the other side of the passageway. Mood immediately restore, Jaskier wiggled through the passageway and rolled into a cartwheel when he emerged on the other side.

“Madeline~” he called. “It’s Jaskier! From last night! I’m so glad it wasn’t a dream!”

There was a high pitch squeak from the next room and Madeline’s voice called out, “hold on.” After a few moments, she emerged, looking surprisingly put together considering she was followed out by a woman with long hair who was wearing clothing that was much drabber than Madeline’s.

She curtsied to him, and walked quickly past him until she disappeared from view. Jaskier turned to Madeline with a raised eyebrow and a smirk. “So who was that?”

Madeline rolled her eyes and waved him into her room. “That was Genevieve, and dammit, before you interrupted, I was soooo close to her saying yes.” She dropped onto her bed and sighed dramatically. “She responds so well to my flirting, but I don’t know if she’s just that shy or if I’m seeing things.”

“Well, how long have you been flirting?” Jaskier wandered over to her actual wardrobe – why did she have another in a separate room, anyway? – and started looking through her clothes, holding a few dresses up to himself consideringly.

“Three years.”

“Wow.” Jaskier blinked and turned to her, a long sleeveless off-white dress in hand. The fabric of it was soft and he couldn’t stop running his fingers over it. “You’re sure she knows you’re flirting?”

Madeline shot him a long suffering look. “I gave up being subtle after the first year.” She shook her head. “Why is dating so hard?”

“Amen to that.”

Her brow crinkled. “A-what?”

“It’s – eh, nevermind. Just a way to say, ‘I feel ya’.” Jaskier held up the dress. “This is so soft. Can I try it on?”

Madeline blinked in surprise, but shrugged. “Go for it. Do they not have satin in your world?”

Jaskier shrugged. “They totally do, I’ve just never worn it, I guess. But I’m definitely gonna start!”

He shucked his t-shirt and skinny jeans and pulled the dress on over his head. Madeline laughed when he got stuck, but she got up and helped him until he could stand in front of the ornate floor length mirror. Jaskier grinned at himself – he was still very clearly masculine, with his chest hair on display from the bias cut neckline, but the hem of the dress fell just above his ankles and there was a long train attached to the dress. He picked up the train and spun in place.

“What do you think?”

Madeline grinned. “Better with make-up, I think.” She laughed at the way his eyes lit up and dragged him over to her vanity. The makeup she had looked completely different from what Jaskier was used to, but Madeline handled the brush expertly as she drew it through the paint and applied it to his eyes and lips. “There. Perfect!”

Jaskier fluttered his eyes at himself in the mirror. He looked downright ravishing, if he did say so himself.

“Oh! I forgot to tell you! Time passes differently in my world! Even though we hung out all afternoon yesterday, only a few hours had passed in my world! Isn’t that crazy?”

“Seriously? So what does that mean? For you, I mean.” Madeline asked.

“Well, I was thinking. What if I went out and really explored your world? Like, if a whole day is only a few hours, then I have tons of time!”

“Hmm,” Madeline tilted her head in thought. “You don’t exactly fit in, though.”

“I mean, I could just be really eccentric?”

“You’re not old enough for that.” She tapped her lip in thought. “Artists are always peculiar. Most actors travel with a troupe, but you play music, right? You could be a bard!”

“Ooooooh!” Jaskier leaned forward in excitement. “That sounds awesome. I just get to go around singing all day? That’s the dream! But, uh...I don’t really write my own music. I mean, I write lyrics, but like...parodies, you know?”

Madeline shrugged. “It’s not as if we’ll know your music, will we? Just maybe try to avoid mentions of your technology. Speaking of which…” She turned an expectant look on him and he made her wait for a bit before grinning and reaching for his discarded pants.

“Okay,” he pulled his phone out of his pocket. “If this works, you’re watching my videos first.”

“Deal. Show me how it works!”

“Okay – shit. There’s no signal. I didn’t even think about internet.”

“What’s internet?”

“It’s like – these satellites are in orbit and – somehow that means I can watch youtube videos?” He shook his head with a wry laugh. “I honestly don’t how it works, I just know what it is.” He pursed his lips in thought. “If it’s just internet, I wonder if my laptop will work with an ethernet cord?”

“I have no idea what that is, but yes. Worth a shot, right?”

He returned Madeline’s grin and got up. “Okay – wait, shit, the whole reason I didn’t have my phone yesterday is because there’s no damn wifi here. But, maybe if we’re close enough to my MiFi, it’ll work?”

Madeline gave him a blank look. “I’m not so sure we speak the same language anymore.”

He laughed. “No, hold on, c’mere. We gotta get close to the wardrobe. The MiFi has to be in my world, but if it’s close enough, maybe my phone in this world can use it!”

He bounced with excitement and tugged on her hand to get her to follow him. It took longer than he thought to get a signal – Madeline got bored and started painting her toes on the floor – but finally, he pulled up his youtube channel.

“Okay, let’s start with Ye Olde Toxic.” Jaskier clicked on his most-liked video and mouthed along to the song.

Madeline’s face morphed from confused and kind of horrified to absolutely enamored as the video went on. “You absolutely have to perform this stuff here. I need everyone to experience this.”

Jaskier laughed brightly. “You’re right – everyone should experience me.”

She punched his shoulder with a chuckle. “Show me more.”

They spent the morning crowded in front of Madeline’s wardrobe, holding his cellphone high to try to get the best signal possible until they got tired of sitting on the floor.

“Can we go into town?” Jaskier asked, eager to truly see this magical world. And also to see a monster. He really, really wanted to see a monster.

Who wouldn’t?

“Not dressed like that, unfortunately.” Madeline frowned. “But I think I might have something that will work for your bard persona.”

“Yessss! Can it also be soft like this?” He swirled around in the dress one last time and almost tripped over the trail. “And maybe not as long.”

“No no, I got it. I have the perfect look for you.” Madeline’s smirk was not at all reassuring, but Jaskier figured she knew her world best.

He was less sure when he actually saw the outfit. It looked nothing like either Madeline or that girl Genevieve’s clothes. He wiggled, testing how he felt. The pants were loose, tapering in towards his ankles, and Madeline had dug out boots that fit him from somewhere. He was wearing an embroidered silk shirt and a blue jacket with red design details. “I like it!” He declared, turning to check out his ass in the mirror. Jaskier unfastened the first several buttons of the jacket and made sure some of his chest hair peeked out. He’d been told it was one of his best features – after his face, his voice, and his hands, of course – and he enjoyed showing it off.

“Actually, you should wear the doublet closed. Otherwise you’re showing off your underwear.” Madeline ruined his fun by pointing out.

“So?”

She raised her eyebrows with a laugh. “All right then. Let’s go!” She nearly ran to her bedroom door, but then she stopped and held up a finger. “Uh, I perhaps should have mentioned. I’m a Countess. This is my castle.”

“Oh. Okay, so you’re important?”

“Not really,” she scoffed. “I basically have all the responsibilities of holding a title and running and estate, and the only benefit is getting invited to all the good parties. Which, okay, is a pretty good bonus.”

“Ooooh, you should bring me to the next party!”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “Let’s see how you do around people, first.” She turned the door handle. “Anyway, um, my household staff definitely know about you. Not sure where they think you came from–”

“Through the window, naturally,” Jaskier waved towards the window which had no convenient trellis or other architectural ladder up the wall.

“Sure. Anyway, I think I should be your patron.”

“What?”

“All artists – well, all good artists – have patrons! It’s how the arts are funded! Nobles with money to spare invest in an artist, and in exchange, we get something – commissioned art, a private performance, you get the idea. What do you think?”

“I mean, sure, I guess? What would I have to do?”

“Just perform.” She smiled. “Since I know the truth about you, this is a good excuse for you to be around my estate. And it means you’ll be able to eat while you’re here.”

“Oh. Yes, I would like that.” His stomach grumbled. “Maybe soon on that food?”

Madeline nodded. “Let’s go into town and eat that the tavern. That way you can be around people and watch them while you eat.”

“Sounds good to me!”

Epilogue

[rareficsnstuff]

Ice Skating [Oikawa, Yachi]

Summary: Yachi and Oikawa get acquainted after a match and Yachi somehow mentions that she’s never been ice skating. But, lucky for her, Oikawa’s got connections. It’s an experience and hilarity ensues.

Words: 2,823

Based off this video

                                 ____________________________

She’s not exactly sure how it happened.  

After Seijoh’s defeat against Karasuno, Yachi – much to her dismay at the time – somehow ended up running into Oikawa. It was… awkward to say the least. Oh, he was friendly enough to her, but she could tell he was struggling to maintain the polite attitude with his victorious opponent’s manager. He was obviously upset. Who wouldn’t be?

But as the conversation went on, and they got chatting about this-and-that, the tension seemed to fade until it was hardly even noticed at all. They talked about all kinds of things and, of course, Oikawa being Oikawa, got on the subject of outer space. Yachi, being Yachi, got on the subject of design. She was surprised at how comfortable she suddenly felt talking to him. The conversation wasn’t really going anywhere. They were just talking. Neither of them was aware of just how long they had been talking when the subject of ice skating of all things came up. Yachi had mentioned that she had never done it and Oikawa was thrilled to tell her that his family was good friends with someone who owned a rink.

Right after this, they were interrupted and soon found themselves being hurried away from each other to their respective teams. Just before they were separated, though, Oikawa managed to slip her his number with a shouted promise over his shoulder that if she contacted him, he would be more than happy to take her ice skating. A couple days later, she texted him and they worked out a time and meeting place.

Now here she was, two weeks later, feeling very small standing beside giant Oikawa outside a large, empty building. Oikawa was absentmindedly spinning a set of keys around on his index finger with his other hand in his pocket. He was humming. Yachi was just staring at the building, a little stunned by its grandeur.

“Impressive, isn’t it?” he said, looking down at her from the corner of his eye.

“Yeah,” she breathed.

“This place belongs to Mr. Kori, an old friend of our family. Just for today, he’s giving us exclusive access to the whole place. Provided, of course, we don’t mess anything up. But I don’t expect that’ll be a problem, do you?” he explained.

“I-I’ll be careful.” Oikawa chuckled at her remark.

“Well, then: shall we go in?” Yachi nodded and the boy went to unlock the door, the small girl just behind him. Like a proper gentlemen, he hug back outside to hold the door open for her.

“After you, miss,” he said with a slight bow and a flourish of his free arm, ushering her inside.

“Thank you,” she said as he followed in after her. If the outside of the building was something to see, it was nothing compared to the inside: very clean, with an elegant and tasteful modern feel to it. Everything was sparkling and, of course, this aspect was not missed in the ice itself. You could tell it was well taken care of. Smoothed out after every use and glistening like a spotless sheet of blue glace.

“The place is closed on Mondays, so that’s why we could get it to ourselves. It’s certainly well taken care of, huh?” Oikawa mused.

“Yeah, it’s beautiful!” she gaped, awestruck.

“Alrighty!” Oikawa exclaimed brightly. “The skates are over here. Whaddya say we pick some out and get right to it, huh?” Yachi nodded.

About five-or-so minutes later they had both found a pair a skates in their size – Yachi obtained hers by way of Oikawa because they were too high up for her to reach – and went to find a bench to sit down and put them on.

“It’s really cool that you know the person who owns this place. It must be nice to come here privately for free!” Yachi said as she was finishing the lace on her second skate.

“Yeah- well… I donno. Actually, this is the first time I’ve made use of the privilege. I mean, the offer’s been there since he opened the place, but I’ve never had any reason to utilize it until now.”

“You never come here with your team or any of your other friends?” Yachi asked. Oikawa’s lips pursed discreetly before he answered.

“Nah, they’d never go for something like this. I think they see it as something too feminine,” he said lightheartedly, accenting the last word with a very feminine flick of his wrist as he batted his eyelashes jokingly. Yachi half-giggled, but quickly put a hand over her mouth to stifle it.

“To be honest, this is actually my first time ice skating as well. I don’t know what to expect… It looks easy enough…” he trailed off, having put on his skates and standing to his feet to look out across the ice with his hands on his hips.

“Really?! I would’ve thought you would have gone at least once! You’ve really never been ice skating with a connection like this?” Yachi asked in surprise. Oikawa turned to look at her.

“Well, like I said, my friends don’t go for stuff like this and going alone would be kinda boring. Sometimes it’s soooo hard being this manly!” he flaunted, lifting his arms to flex them dramatically. He cracked one eye open to peek at her reaction. Again, Yachi lifted a hand to mute her tiny laughter. Interesting. Seeing that she had also finished getting her skates on, he offered a hand to help her up and, accepting, she was easily pulled to her feet where there was half a second loss of balance on the narrow rubber guards of the skates.

“Shall we?” Oikawa prompted.

“We have to at this point,” Yachi replied simply, staring out a little nervously across the ice.

“…”

“…”

“Well… go on, Yachi.”

“Why do I have to go first?!” she whined, now suddenly panicking.

“B-because you’re a lady… Ladies first, right?”

“You’re only using that as an excuse because you’re as scared as I am!… I’m gonna fall.” It was true. Oikawa had no confidence in his abilities (or disabilities) as a skater. That ice looked cold and very unforgiving if someone were to fall on their ass. His eyes were currently displaying a clear depiction of minor terror.

“I-uh… How’ bout this: you go first, but don’t go in any farther than this gate. That way, if you fall, I’ll be here to catch you. And you’ll have the wall too,” he reasoned.

“O-okay. I think I can do that.” She walked up to the short wall dividing the concrete and ice and, leaning against it for stability, she removed the rubber guards. With a last, uneasy look back at Oikawa, she picked up one foot and placed it gingerly on the ice before doing the same with the other, all the while holding onto the wall for dear life. Once she felt more-or-less balanced, she carefully stood upright… About ten seconds later, she was still standing there, wide eyed and rigid.

“…”

“… Try taking a step – “

“You try taking a step!” Yeah, Yachi was panicking. Oikawa chuckled.

“Don’t worry. If you fall, I’ll catch you,” he encouraged, moving closer to her in case of the worst. She shifted, preparing to take the terrifying step.

She stepped, slid forward a little, wobbled – Oikawa leaned forward, lifting his arms – and stopped. Then she took another step, sliding again. And another step, and another, and another. Each step bigger and more confident than the last as she moved along the wall and before she knew it, she was half way to the other end of the rink, Oikawa following along on the outside, beaming at her.

“Well, look at you, Yachi! You’re a natural!” he praised as she continued on, now traveling to the center and picking up pace. She was skating! This was a lot easier than she thought! But suddenly realizing something, she changed her course and made her way back to the wall where Oikawa still stood.

“What are you still doing out there? Aren’t you gonna skate too, Oikawa?”

“Yeah, of course I am!” he exclaimed excitedly, hurrying to the gate and removing the rubber guards. Watching Yachi successfully brave the ice and conquer it made him feel much more confident about his odds and he was finally ready to try too as he stepped boldly onto the ice.

The event which unfolded before Yachi’s eyes was… unexpected. Yachi knew it was easy now, and she made it look so easy that even after all her panic, Oikawa assumed it was easy.

Apparently it wasn’t.

Maybe her center of gravity, being closer to the ground, made it easier for her.

In short: Oikawa slipped.

He didn’t slip right away, though. Imagine a small army of spiders at your feet: nearly anyone would panic and start stomping on them maniacally. That’s what Oikawa looked like. Stomping furiously, arms flailing in a desperate (hilarious) attempt to keep his balance before he inevitably fell on his ass when his legs literally slipped out from under him. He even went so far as to lose his balance after landing on his butt and fell further to the ground, now laying on his side and looking quite like a dead man.

Though it played in slow-mo for the both of them, in reality, the whole thing happened in only three seconds. As it happened, Yachi only had time to process that he was falling and gasped. Oikawa, too, only had time to register an impending doom, but managed to soften the blow by throwing his hands out behind him in the initial fall. However, now that the severity of the situation had passed, the hilarity of it hit them both hard.

Oikawa was the first to lose it; cracking up in his dead-man position before he rolled onto his back and began struggling to stand again. Yachi was silent for a moment longer until she felt the butterflies fluttering in her stomach and the bubbly glee rising in her throat as her lips parted in a grin. But, again, she raised her hands to stifle the laughter. For whatever reason it was that she was trying to hold it back, it didn’t matter anyways because the next thing that happened was just as beautifully, tragically amusing.

Having decided that getting himself to a squatted position first and working from there was his best option, Oikawa tried to press himself to a standing position. But all that he managed was to kick his legs out sporadically from the squatted position before falling again onto his back. The laughing probably didn’t help his efforts at all and now he couldn’t see through the tears. Now Yachi had no hope of holding anything back. Her giggles rang out like a bell, pushing the both of them further into hysterics.

Against his better judgment, and rather than just crawling back out of the rink like a sensible young man who knew when he was beat, Oikawa tried once more to stand. This was his worst attempt yet. Although he was technically on his feet, what he managed was the most bizarre dance you’d ever seen. Knees never fully straight, feet stomping, legs kicking, arms flailing like propellers, and whole self traveling steadily closer to the wall where he finally found purchase on the short, dividing structure. With his stomach aching from laughter and his cheeks damp with tears, he crawled along the wall and onto the concrete. Yachi had her hands over her face, but this did nothing to staunch the laughter spilling from her mouth in vigorous waves. When she regained some form of composure, she made her way off the ice as well and adopted a furrowed-brow expression of minor concern.

“Are you okahay?” she asked, still giggling as they began putting their guards back on.

“Oh, now you ask?! Whehere were you when I almost died half a dozen tihimes?!” he teased.

“I-he, I was-“

“You were laughing at me, that’s whehere! Is my pain funny to you, Yacchan?!”

“Y-you were lahaughing too!”

“Yes, but you were laughing at mehe!”

“Youhu were laughing at yoursehelf!”

“Okay, you want something to laugh about, Missy?! I’ll give you something to laugh about!”

Yachi was just in time to give him a confused look before he threw an arm around her waist in a half-hug while his free hand immediately went to knead her side. She shrieked before falling into bright, surprised giggles.

“Howdoya like that! Huh? You sill think my pain’s funny?!” he teased, moving his hand up to worm his fingers between her ribs and causing her to double over. The moment she did it, she seriously regretted it. She nodded. It was funny, though, and they both knew it, but in this situation, the act was dangerous.

“Oh, you think so, do you? Well, you know what I think? I think I’m gonna have to teach you a lesson in courtesy!” He adjusted to wrap both arms around her waist and picked her up, dragging her back to the bench as she kicked and pushed at his arms desperately.

“Noho! Let gohohooo!” she begged.

“Mmm… na, I don’t think so,” he said, sitting and pulling her down on his lap, still wrapped in his arms. Using both hands, he pinched and tweaked and scribbled at her ribs and sides, occasionally going to pinch at her hips. This action made her kick both legs out in front of her every time he did it.

“Stahah- pleahehese! Dohonhahahaa!” She was really trying to get free, but his arms had her there like a seat belt and she was steadily losing strength from the torture. When his fingers lingered a little too long at her lowest ribs (a sweet spot of hers) she got a little desperate and somehow managed to turn sideways in his lap where she was able to straighten her legs and slip off his lap and through his hold to freedom… Almost.

Just before she slipped all the way through, Oikawa caught her wrists and clasped them together in one hand.

“And just where do you think you’re going? I don’t think you’ve quite learned your lesson yet.”

“Noho! No-WAIT!” she shrieked as his free hand was moving dangerously close to her exposed underarms. AKA: her death spot.

“Hmn? What’s that? You’ve got something to say?” he asked, keeping his hand suspended over his potential target.

“I-I…I’m sohoryhehehe!”

“You know something? I don’t think I believe you. You’re still laughing. You haven’t learned your lesson yet, Yacchan,” he teased, the comment sealing Yachi’s fate.

“NOOOHOHAHAHAAAA! STAhahaha!” Yachi was gone. Tears pricked in the corners of her eyes as she writhed and kicked wildly, trying in vain to distract herself from the torturous sensations. Her thin, long-sleeved top did absolutely nothing to protect her. When she began thrashing her head from side-to-side, he eased up a bit, switching between dragging his fingers, feather-light, up and down her arms, making them twitch and tremble, and pinching at her ribs.

“Pleaheheheeese! Ihi’m sorryyyhehehe! I’m sohorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorryhe, I’m sorryeeeEeEEEEE!” Her laughter increased again when he returned to her underarms.

“Do elaborate, please. What are you sorry for?” he ordered, relentlessly continuing his torment. It took her several tries to get the words out through her laughter, but on about the sixth go of it, she managed something that held a vague resemblance to human speech.

“I SAHARI FA LAHAGHHA AD YAHAHOW!”

“I’m not entirely sure I understood that… but it’s good enough, I suppose.” He finally released her wrists and allowed her to slide the rest of the way to the ground, panting and giggling.

“It was pretty hilarious, though…” he mused as she struggled to catch her breath. Her lingering grin widened at his statement. “You have a nice laugh. You shouldn’t try to hide it all the time.” The sudden honesty mad Yachi blush and she was suddenly thankful for the red her complexion had already taken on from the earlier exertion. “But it’s really not fair! I mean, you made it look so easy! How did you do that?!” he whined.

“I-I don’t knohow. I just did?”

“… You just did, huh?” He moved his hand down to claw at her stomach, making her curl up and giggle again.

“Alright, miss natural ~ Do you think you could help me out? I seem to be having some difficulties with the matter myself, if you hadn’t noticed.”

“Y-yeah. I… I think I could do that,” she said, still laying in recovery on the ground. Oikawa stood up from his spot on the bench and walked around beside Yachi, offering her a hand and pulling her to her feet like she weighed no more than a rag doll.

“So… What do I do first, Teach?”

It was a very memorable first ice skating experience.

[cynicallystiles]

Full Stop: Part 2

Disclaimer: Gif originally posted by me.

Author: @cynicallystiles​

Request: @itrocksmysocks - Song-based fic from the song “Punto y Aparte” by Morat. Second part.

Warning: Fluff, angst, swear words, and mention of sex.

Notes: Soooo sorry this took so long. I’m glad I’m able to get it out before I go away though! Please COMMENT/REBLOG if you enjoy! Especially because fics can’t always be found by searching.

Pairing: Shawn Mendes x Reader

Masterlist in Bio

Words: 7,646

~3 Years Later~

Your heels click against the pavement as you make your way into the studio building for your interview. After the song you wrote with Selena Gomez became extremely popular, you've gotten the opportunity to work on many successful albums in the past three years.

You've collaborated with Julia Michaels, MAX, and even Demi Lovato. To know that you were the one to help write so many popular songs was wild. You never really thought you'd get recognition considering songwriters are more of the silent, unsung heroes of the showbiz industry. But, that all changed thanks to Camila Cabello and the latest song you co-wrote with her.

While the two of you were writing the song Consequences, Camila found out that you had an amazing set of pipes. She insisted on you being in the spotlight for a change and posted a video of you singing the song on her official channel. After that, you've gotten a few note-worthy calls from interviewers wanting to be the first to talk to you.

Out of the many offers that you were flattered by, you decided to go on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. You figured between that one, James Corden, and Ellen that Jimmy would be the least likely to dig up all your secrets the first go around.

As you enter the set, you take in all the people bustling about preparing for the show. You spot a food table and make your way over to get a snack since you didn't have time to eat this morning. Just as you're about to take a bite of a muffin, someone taps your shoulder.

You spin around and find Jimmy standing there grinning at you. "Hey! Y/n, I didn't know you were here or I would've found you sooner!" He chuckles.

"No worries! I just got here actually." You smile back reassuringly.

"Oh! That's great! Do you wanna walk with me while we talk about what's on the agenda?" He gestures over his shoulder.

You raise your eyebrows slightly with a surprised smile. "Uh, sure!" He nods in response and turns around to take off. You start a little bit before quickly grabbing the muffin and catching up with him.

He gives you a small tour of the set and your green room. All the while, he's going over the plan for the show. You're actually doing the show with Camila, who will be in later since she's the one that started this all. The two of you are gonna play one of the games called "True Confessions" for a little bit. Then, you'll shoot the actual interview part. Easy enough, right?

Later after hair and makeup have touched you up a bit, you sit to one side of the stage in a rolling office chair. While Jimmy and Camila sit at a triangular table with prop coffee cups and fake-burning cigarettes. Jimmy begins the introductions with Camila and you wait for your cue. A stagehand stands behind you, ready to give you a push out onto the set.

"But, we need one more person to play. Don't you think Camila?" You watch them do their rehearsed lines. After Camila agrees, Jimmy continues. "She's a songwriter to the stars, and more recently, a viral singing sensation...y/n y/l/n!"

You brace yourself by gripping the seat of your chair as the stagehand gives you a gentle yet powerful push out onto the stage. A laugh escapes your lips as you roll toward the table and hold one hand out to catch yourself. Your grip falters and you almost continue rolling until Camila reaches out and steadies you.

"Phew," you say through laughs. "I do not have a license for one of these bad boys, apparently!" You shake your head playfully as you scoot closer to the table, clasping your hands in front of you as you lean in slightly.

Jimmy snickers as he tries to get through the instructions. "There are two envelopes in front of each of us...one containing a truth and one containing a lie!"

Earlier, as you were being interviewed for the game, you had trouble coming up with your truth. According to the person creating the envelopes, the truths they put in are usually so absurd that people think they're lies. But, you're only 20 years old and you don't have any weirdly absurd truths.

Eventually, you narrowed it down to a few that could work. You didn't know which one they'd end up choosing and you didn't get to know what the lie would be. So, now you're sat at the table just hoping the truth they picked is one of the easier ones to talk about.

"Alright, Camila! You'll go first...y/n, pick which envelope she should open!" Jimmy announces and you squint your eyes playfully at Camila.

"Well..." you drag out the word slightly. "You're one of a kind so I'll have you open number one!"

Camila places a hand over her heart as she gives you an 'aw' face. She opens her envelope and reads it aloud. You and Jimmy take turns asking questions to try and see whether or not she was telling the truth. Jimmy guessed that she was telling the truth but you thought otherwise. You ended up being right and you were actually surprised because it was a wild guess.

Jimmy's turn is next and Camila also has him open his first envelope. The game went on and the both of you guessed that he was telling the truth. You were both correct. Which meant that, to your dismay, it was your turn to open an envelope.

"Okay, y/n..." Jimmy begins as he strokes his chin thoughtfully. "I'm gonna have you open the second one just to shake things up a bit."

You giggle nervously as you reach for the envelope. "Aw, man...I'm a really bad liar," you admit as you start to open it.

"Quit tryna fake us out, because we're not falling for it!" Camila demands dramatically.

You shrug. That wasn't your intention at all, but let them think what they want. Your fingers shake, barely noticeable to yourself as you open the envelope. Inhaling deeply, you try to keep your face as neutral as possible while you read what's in yours.

Your expression betrays you as you skim the words; your brows rise the tiniest bit and your mouth parts. Tilting your head slightly to the side with an imperceptible smirk, you clear your throat and prepare to read your card.

"I once broke up with a boyfriend at a party that I threw to welcome him home after being gone for the whole summer." You hear laughter from the audience and the two sitting across from you.

Placing the card back inside the envelope, you clasp your hands together on the table in front of you. You roll your lips together to prevent yourself from giving anything away as you look up to meet their stares.

Camila is staring at you inscrutably while Jimmy is cracking up. "Man...I don't even know where to start," Jimmy says through chuckles.

"How old were you?" Camila starts.

"17." You answer plainly.

"How old was he?" Jimmy continues.

"Also 17."

Camila immediately throws another question. "How long had you been dating?"

"Just over two and a half years." Your voice gives nothing away.

Jimmy continues the back and forth questioning. "And why was he gone all summer?"

"He was on a tour as an opening act."

Your eyes never leave theirs and you have to fight to keep yourself from laughing. They'll never catch you. Your attention is drawn to Camila as she addresses you.

"What's his name??"

You suck in air through your teeth, causing a slight hissing sound. "Can't tell you that."

Jimmy. "Who was he opening for?"

"Can't tell you that either." You click your tongue and shrug your shoulder.

Camila. "Why would you throw him a party just to break up with him?"

"Well, it wasn't really planned," you begin as you reach your index finger up to scratch the side of your nose. "He had barely spoken to me all summer. And truth be told, way before that it was kind of always about him. When I saw him at the party I just didn't feel anything anymore."

Their questions are getting more and more frantic as the seconds tick down. "How did he take it?" Jimmy practically screams.

"Not well."

"Elaborate!" Camila demands.

You sigh. "We ended up yelling at each other in his front lawn before I drove off." Just as you finish answering, you hear the sound that signals the time is up.

Jimmy is dying of laughter as he looks at you in astonishment. "The party was at his house?? You broke up with him at his house??"

"I do believe the time is up, sir." You scrunch your eyebrows at him innocently. "But, yes I did," you add quickly with a chuckle.

Camila leans back in her chair. "There's no way she could be lying, Jimmy! I mean she was rock solid the whole time!" She cracks up laughing.

"I'm gonna agree. Y/n..." he turns his attention to you. "Was that your truth?"

You pause for dramatic effect, letting the two of them lean forward in anticipation. "...No. that was my lie!" You say loudly and triumphantly as the audience applauses.

"What?!" Jimmy exclaims grasps each side of his forehead in disbelief.

"No way!" Camila says and slaps the table with each word.

You nod, the cocky grin spreading just a little wider on your lips. "It was my lie, guys."

"I guess you are a good liar after all..." Jimmy teases.

Licking your lips you sit up straighter in your chair. "Actually, I'm not," you laugh.

"Then, how did you do it??" Camila clutches your arm and shakes you.

"Well, that actually happened..." you begin. Jimmy opens his mouth as he points at you, but you cut him off. "Except...it was the other way around. He dumped me at the 'Welcome Home' party I threw for him."

Both of their eyes widen in shock after you tell them. Jimmy swallows before he looks to the camera and signs off. Once the camera is off, you all stand up and take a small break before heading to the interview portion.

As you all stand at the snack table, you sip on your real coffee contently. Tension seeps into the air as Camila and Jimmy watch you closely. When he clears his throat, you look up from the table.

"Listen, uh, y/n," he stutters. "I-I really didn't know they would write that on there. I'm sorry you had to talk about it," he finishes sincerely.

You give him an understanding smile. "It's totally fine, Jimmy," you sigh. "It...it was three years ago and I'm really not affected by it anymore." He nods with a smile and you go back to your coffee.

After that awkward moment, you and Camila did the interview flawlessly. Soon enough, you were heading back to your hotel for the night before heading back home in the morning. You moved away from Pickering as soon as you graduated and you were attending university in Toronto.

It's winter break and that's why you were able to fly down here to do the interview in the first place. Truth be told, your life was kind of hectic trying to balance classes and flying back and forth to America to write songs with singers. You were managing pretty well though.

You settled into your bed and clicked on the TV so you could watch The Tonight Show when it airs. After the pizza you ordered arrives, you place it on the table just as the show comes on. It was fun watching yourself on TV. You'd never really thought about becoming famous; that was more of Shawn's dream than yours.

The next morning, you wake to the sound of your phone ringing. Reaching over, you feel around for your phone. You finally grab it and hit the answer button before holding it to your ear.

"Hello?" You question with a groggy tone.

The voice on the other end surprises you. "Yes. Hi! Is this y/n y/l/n?"

"Um...yeah, it is!" You respond, immediately waking up.

"Great! Listen, I watched you with Jimmy last night...and we just gotta have you next! How would you like to come on the show in a couple of days?" Ellen asks.

You struggle to stutter out a response. "I, uh...I would love to! I'm surprised you're calling me yourself, to be honest," you chuckle incredulously.

"Well, I wanted to make sure that you knew how excited I am to have you on with me!" You raise your brows, unable to comprehend how she's so energetic this early. "So, does two days from now work for you to film?"

Glancing at the clock, you sit up. "Y-yeah! I'll just have to change my flight this afternoon and we should be good." The smile grows on your face and you can't believe this is happening. "Oh, shoot!"

"What? What's the matter?" She questions worriedly.

You rub your forehead with your other hand. "It's nothing...I just didn't pack anything else to wear. You know what? It's totally fine, I'll just take tomorrow to find an outfit for your show!" You ramble nervously.

"What?? No!" Ellen protests. "I don't wanna put you out any! We'll provide you with a nice outfit and you can keep it as a 'thank you' for doing the show!"

"Wow! I don't know what to say...that's incredibly nice of you."

"Say yes!"

You laugh. "Okay...yes! I will see you in a couple days!"

"Can't wait! We'll email you all the details tomorrow!" Ellen responds warmly before hanging up the phone. You sit there for a moment wondering if that really just happened or if you're still dreaming.

After taking a few moments to compose yourself, you quickly call to change your flight from Toronto to L.A. Then you go about packing up your stuff so you can make your flight. As you head down to the cab waiting for you, your phone sounds with a special tone.

Your heart constricts and part of you regrets never having changed his tone back to default. But, part of you appreciates knowing it's him and being able to delete the text without looking. It's not the first time he's texted you since the breakup. He periodically texts you on holidays and your birthday, but you haven't once responded.

Today is neither a holiday nor your birthday so you're a little curious as to why he's texting you. The cab lets you out in front of the airport and your hand keeps going to your phone in your back pocket as you wait in the security line. You could just check it and then delete it. Your read receipts are off and he would never know.

You bite your thumbnail the entire time, right up until you board the plane. As you sit in a seat next to a window, you pull your phone out and your thumb hovers over the conversation thread. Slowly, you lower your thumb until it's touching the screen...and then you slide it to the left. You stare at the red button for several seconds.

"Ma'am?" You look up as a flight attendant addresses you. "We're about to take off, you'll need to turn that off."

You smile as you nod and look back to your phone. Quickly pressing the red button, you shut your phone off. You don't need to know what it says. Shawn waived all opportunities to talk to you when he broke your heart. The saddest part about that day wasn't losing a boyfriend, surprisingly. It was losing your best friend.

Hours later, the plane touches down and you make your way to a hotel for the evening. After settling in for the night, you find yourself in a YouTube rabbit hole until you fall asleep. You're so jet-lagged that you don't hear your phone chiming several times while you're asleep.

You wake the next morning and check all of your notifications as you brush your teeth. In your inbox was an email from Ellen's team detailing the plan for tomorrow, just like she promised. You scroll through the email as you wander back into the bedroom. Your brow's furrow when they come to a particular part of the email.

Once you receive this email, please text the number at the bottom for more a sensitive information exchange.

"Umm...okay?" You mumble out loud as you enter the number in and send a message saying you got the number from an email. While you wait for a response, you go about getting ready for the day. You have it to yourself, so you were gonna explore L.A. a bit.

Just as you were about to leave your room to go out, your phone buzzes with an incoming text. You pull it out of your pocket as you close the door and head toward the stairs. Your features light up when you read the message.

Hey, y/n! It's Ellen! This is my personal number and I figured you'd rather answer a few sensitive questions to me instead of a crew member.

You reach the street outside and stop for a moment to respond.

You: Hi! That's thoughtful of you. What kind of questions?

After pressing send, you check your phone to see when your Uber will be arriving. It says they are a few minutes away, so you just put in some earbuds to listen to music as you wait. Your phone buzzes again, and you check it.

Ellen: It's only a couple! They might seem kind of strange but also kind of personal.

As you're reading the text, you almost miss your Uber pull up. You hop in and give the driver a random tourist destination on your list. "Santa Monica Pier, please!" Your attention is drawn back to your phone as you answer.

You: I don't know if I should be worried by that...but go ahead I guess!

You look out the window as you hold your phone in your lap. The music thumps in your eardrums lightly, and you can't help but sway to the beat. You've been clicking the volume button on your phone off and on nervously, so you jump a bit when your phone chimes through your earbuds.

Ellen: Okay, the first question is important. Because depending on your answer, that changes the second question.

Your brows furrow together in curiosity as you wait for her to ask.

Ellen: Are you single and ready to mingle?

A snort sounds in your throat and you look up to see if your driver is paying attention. Seeing that they aren't, you grin a bit and type out a joking response.

You: Well, I'm single. And I'm flattered...but you're married.

You chuckle to yourself as you go back to looking at your surroundings. As you pass some things, you take a few pictures to remember. A few minutes pass before your phone sounds again.

Ellen: Sorry I took a minute. I was laughing so hard I couldn't see the keys.

Ellen: I didn't mean to mingle with me! Though I'm flattered lol

You: Why'd you need to know then?

Ellen: It's a surprise! Next question and you totally don't have to answer...

Anxiety bubbles up in you a bit as you watch the bubbles on the screen. Relief floods your veins as you read it.

Ellen: Are you into boys or girls or both maybe?

Just as you're about to answer, the Uber stops and you realize that you're at the Pier. Tipping the driver, you get out and wander along as you reply to Ellen.

You: I don't have a preference actually. I've kind of always just liked who I liked.

It was an odd question, but you weren't shy about your sexual orientation. You're sure that Ellen doesn't need to know it for malicious reasons, so you feel comfortable sharing it with her. You've dated a few people since Shawn, both boys and girls. None of them really worked out though.

Ellen: Great! That helps so much! Can't wait to see you tomorrow!

You: Same here!

You reply quickly and tuck your phone back into your pocket as you enjoy a few hours at the Pier. A little while later, you call another Uber and hit a couple more tourist destinations before going back to your hotel. You wanted to be rested up for the interview tomorrow but you weren't quite tired. So, you watched dance compilation videos until you fell asleep.

The next morning, your alarm wakes you up in time to get ready to head to the studio in Burbank. Your Uber arrived soon after you were ready and drove you to your destination. The entire way there, your stomach filled with more and more butterflies. This will be your second television interview in one week. In all honesty, you didn't think you were worth all the hype from one singing video.

As soon as you arrived, you were ushered to wardrobe in order to find something suitable to wear. They brought you to a room filled with clothing options and told you to pick out what you'd like. You could even mix and match if it suited you. As you looked through the clothes, you received another text with a special tone. Without reading it, you hit delete and continue looking.

You settle on a two-piece, baby blue, velvet dress set with a black, sweater-like cardigan since it was cold out. The two pieces came so close together that you could barely see a strip of skin, which was fine with you. To match, you picked out a pair of black, velvet, thigh-high boots. After you were dressed, you were taken to get your hair and makeup done.

By the time you were supposed to head out onstage, you looked like an actual celebrity. Usually, you never dressed like this. But then again, you could never really afford it on a university budget. You wait backstage as Ellen does a few things with the crowd before beginning your introduction.

At the sound of cheers after Ellen announces your name, you walk out confidently and wave. Several whistles sound from the crowd and Ellen does a dramatic double-take. "Yowza!" She says as you hug her and the audience laughs.

You giggle in response as you settle into your seat and cross your legs. As you wait for the audience to settle down, you go to nibble on your lip but remember your lipstick. Looking around, you realize you're on a loveseat. Which was weird, considering you don't remember the email saying there'd be another guest with you. You straighten your back as Ellen addresses you.

"Wow! Y/n??" She scoffs playfully as she looks around. "Is that you??"

You nod as you chuckle along with her. "Yes, Ellen. It's me."

"I'm sorry, I-I just didn't recognize you! You look so different from when you were on Jimmy's show!" She teases.

Rolling your eyes playfully, you reply. "Well, that's obviously because Jimmy didn't give me a free outfit along with hair and makeup!" You laugh as Ellen points at you.

"That was supposed to be our secret!"

"I'm sorry! I didn't know!" You joke as you raise your hands up defensively.

She waves her hand dismissively. "Well, no matter! You look stunning either way!"

"Aww! Thank you, Ellen!" You smile genuinely as you place a hand on your heart. "And thank you for having me on here in the first place!"

She copies your gesture in response. "You're welcome!" You laugh and all the tension and butterflies from this morning leave your stomach. "So tell me, y/n...how does it feel to be so popular from one video?"

"Honestly..." you breathe in deeply before sputtering it out. "It's so weird!" Ellen chuckles good-heartedly, as does the crowd. "Like, I never expected to become a songwriter...let alone for so many people to follow my Instagram after Camila posted one video of me singing," you laugh.

Ellen leans forward in her seat and you lean against the left arm of the loveseat. "Really?? You never wanted to be a songwriter? But, the songs you've helped write are so good!"

"Thank you," you giggle as the crowd claps in agreement. "But, um...no, I never dreamt of being a famous person. I've always been happier behind the scenes, ya know?"

"What did you want to be then?" She asks.

You swallow, not really remembering from so many years ago. "I think I wanted to be a poet? I, uh...I won a lot of poetry competitions when I was a teenager."

"Oh, yeah! I think I remember hearing something about that," Ellen chimes. Your brows crease in confusion as to how she could've known that. "You also had one published in a literary magazine, yeah?" You nod. "What changed?? I mean, you obviously could've been successful at that!"

Clearing your throat, you shift in your seat again. "Well...when I was sixteen, I took up piano to fill a lot of my free time. I ended up entering a songwriting contest and got to write a song with Selena Gomez that summer!"

"What?! At sixteen??" She marvels.

You nod. "Well, I was sixteen when I won, but seventeen when I flew down here to write with her."

"What song was it?"

"'Can't Keep My Hands To Myself'," you giggle as you tuck some hair behind your ear.

"Really?" Ellen breathes out and you nod again. "How did you find inspiration for that as a seventeen-year-old?"

You lick your lips nervously before speaking. "Okay, so we had been throwing ideas around all morning but nothing stuck," you tell the story as you talk with your hands. "So, we took a break to order pizza and Selena caught me looking at my phone nonstop," you chuckle.

"Why were you looking at your phone?"

"I'm getting there!" You giggle and she holds up her hands as she scoots back into her chair. "I was waiting for a text from my then-boyfriend," you pause before adding quickly, "that never came, actually." You laugh before continuing, "Anyway, Selena asked who it was. I told her and she looked him up, saying he was cute and that she didn't know how I kept my hands to myself around him. I said I couldn't. Then, I added-"

"I mean I could, but why would I want to!!" Ellen finishes your sentence.

You shrug with a smile. "Thus, the song was born."

"Wait, wait, wait," Ellen says rapidly. "That song is based off of your boyfriend. Not Selena's?"

You tilt your head as you shrug. "Well, that line was. I dunno about the whole song...and ex-boyfriend. We split up a long time ago."

Ellen nods thoughtfully. "So, you're single now?"

"Yes..." you look at her quizzically because she already knows the answer.

She claps her hands together. "Great! Then, we're gonna play a little game!" The audience cheers loudly.

"Oh, no..." you chuckle, "What have I gotten myself into?"

"Good things only!" Ellen assures you. "We're gonna play 'Who'd You Rather?', and how it works is-" She pause briefly as she looks to you. You raise your eyebrows as if to ask why she stopped. "You're not gonna ask the question?"

You look around confused. "What question? I'm listening to you explains the rules!" You giggle.

"Well, yeah!" She shrugs. "But, most people ask 'who'd I rather what?'" She says mockingly and it earns a laugh from the crowd.

You purse your lips in thought. "I just assumed it was along the lines of who I'd rather date because you asked if I was single," you explain.

"You are officially my new favorite!" She announces before continuing with the rules. "We are gonna pull up pictures of two people and you have to tell us who you'd rather until it's narrowed down to one."

Patting the arm of your seat, you wiggle in excitement. "Sounds easy enough! Let's go!"

"All right!! First up we have..." Ellen pauses as she looks at the screen in front of the two of you. "Miles Heizer or Nick Robinson?"

Leaning back in your seat, you contemplate. "Starting it off hard, Ellen!" You laugh. "Uhhh, I feel bad for who I'm not gonna pick!" You laugh again.

"They don't have feelings, y/n. They're pictures!" Ellen says plainly causing you to laugh.

"Ugh! Fine...I'll go with Nick," you admit.

Ellen reads the next name that comes up. "Nick or Shailene Woodley?"

"Ooo," you groan. "Still Nick."

"Nick or Hailee Steinfeld?"

You suck in air through your teeth and the choice is physically hurting you. "Hailee," you answer confidently.

"Oh? Switching it up!" Ellen announces as a picture of John Boyega comes up next to Hailee. "Hailee or-"

"Hailee." You chuckle as Ellen laughs because you cut her off.

Composing herself, she continues. "Hailee or Cara Dele-"

"Still Hailee," you giggle more.

Ellen takes a deep breath. "Man, you really like Hailee."

"Sure do," you agree.

The next picture comes up and it's of Taron Egerton. "Hailee or Taron?"

"Oof...uhhh," you drag out as you shake your leg. "I'm gonna switch it up...Taron!"

Ellen looks at you in surprise. "Really? You're leaving Hailee for Taron?"

"It's the accent," you admit before chuckling.

"Fair point..." she turns her attention back to the screen. "Taron or Ariana Grande?"

You nod as you say, "Taron."

"Taron or...ooo! Zendaya!"

"Zendaya!" You say a little too quickly. Ellen looks at you surprised. "It's Zendaya!!" You giggle. Man, you haven't laughed this hard in a long time.

"Zendaya or...Tom Holland?"

You physically want to cry now. Flopping your back against the cushion of the loveseat, you pout. "Ellen...you're killing me! I mean that's like making me choose between water and oxygen!"

"We're almost done, I promise!" She laughs loudly.

Groaning, you sit back up and stare at the screen while biting your lip. "Well...I pick Tom 'cause Zendaya is straight." You straighten your shoulders, proud of your decision.

"Good thinking!" Ellen nods. "Okay, next...Tom Holland or..." She pauses as the next picture comes up on the screen. Your heart constricts as you look at the handsome and charming boy on the screen. "Shawn Mendes!"

You space out a little bit as you look at his picture. He looks completely different than he did three years ago. And yet, he still had the same charming smile that you used to love. His eyes were less hazel and more honey-colored but still warm. What shocked you the most was how much he looked like a grown man, but somehow still looked like the boy you grew up with.

Clearing your throat, you snap yourself out of it. "Tom Holland," you state simply, your good mood from before gone. It felt like an hour that you stared at that picture but to everyone else, it was just a second. A buzzer dings loudly.

"And there you have it! Tom," Ellen says addressing the cameras. "Give her a call!" She jokes and you force a lighthearted laugh. Ellen turns her attention back to you. "I'm a little surprised that you picked Tom over a fellow Canadian!"

You swallow the lump that's formed in your throat and smile. "It's all about the accent, Ellen," you tease and she chuckles with you.

"I'm sure it is..." she says coyly and you squint at her suspiciously. "It's funny you should pick Tom over Shawn because he was on just last week...and he stuck with you for the last half of the game!"

Steadying your breathing, you tilt your head to the side curiously. "Is that right?" Ellen nods. "That's very flattering, but I'm wondering how I was even in the mix in the first place! The video has not been up for more than a couple of weeks," you point out.

"You're an overnight sensation, y/n! Much like Shawn was when he first started," she explains. You nod along with a small smile. "Back to the matter at hand...he had some interesting things to share about you!"

"Oh," you breathe out before forcing a chuckle. "All good things I hope?"

Ellen looks at you with a knowing glint in her eye. "Well, it turns out...that the two of you went to school together! Were the two of you friends? That'd be a small world, huh?" The audience laughs along with her.

"Well...yes. We did go to the same school," you admit. "We were classmates, yeah," you heave a heavy sigh as you continue, "calling us friends would be a bit of a stretch."

She sits back and looks at you for a long moment. Just as you're about to crack under her scrutiny, she speaks. "Is that right?" You open your mouth to respond when, out of nowhere, the crowd starts cheering the loudest you've ever heard. Ellen tried to address you over the noise. "You wouldn't call the two of you friends??"

"Not really..." You say in a normal tone after the crowd quiets down mostly.

"Ouch. That kinda hurt my feelings." You whirl your head around at the sort of familiar voice. As you were talking to Ellen, Shawn had crept up on the loveseat from backstage. You sit frozen in place as you watch him go over and hug Ellen. God, that picture from the game didn't do him justice.

He was taller. So much taller. And you don’t know how but his jawbone looks like it was chiseled by the Greek gods. He has a glowing tan from the sun and the clothes he’s wearing suit him so fucking well. “Y/n?”

You snap out of your thoughts at the sound of Ellen calling your name. “Huh?” Your expression is still stunned and she chuckles.

“Aren’t you gonna greet our guest?”

“Right! Sorry,” you laugh nervously as you stand up and straighten your skirt. “Hey,” you breathe out jaggedly as he opens his arms for a hug. God, you wouldn’t be able to take the torture of hugging him. So you do the most awkward thing imaginable and stick out your hand for him to shake.

He looks at it as his brows raise but he takes it politely. His large hand wraps around yours and he brings his other one to cup the back of your hand warmly. “It’s good to see you,” he says genuinely.

“I wish I could say the same,” you mumble under your breath before clearing your throat. He retracts his hand and the two of you sit on the seat. You lean as far to the left as you can while he props his left arm on the back of the couch.

Once the audience settles down, Ellen immediately begins interrogating you. “So you said the two of you weren’t friends but Shawn seems to think differently. What’s going on there?”

“Well,” you day as you take a deep breath. You have to play this right or all his fans would hate you. But, you also didn’t want to tell the truth. “The guy I was friends with was awkward, wanted to be an actor and was the biggest dork that I knew. This tall, handsome, singer guy is someone completely different,” you force a laugh that sounds genuine.

The crowd laughs with you and you notice Shawn tilt his head to the side as he looks at you. “So you think he’s handsome?” Ellen asks.

You shrug. “I’m not blind, Ellen.” This causes Shawn to chuckle from beside you and the sound of his laughter twists your stomach into knots.

“I’m sensing some chemistry here. Did the two of you ever date?” She leans forward interestedly. To your surprises, Shawn doesn’t offer up an answer and you stay quiet as well. Many ‘ooo’s come from the audience. “Well now that Shawn’s here, I have the perfect game to play!”

You roll your eyes with a smirk. “Oh no. Here we go,” you laugh.

“It’s time to play ‘Never Have I Ever’!” She shouts before handing the two of your the paddles.

Shawn leans over and whispers in your ear as she explains the rules. “Can we talk after the show?” You subtly shake your head before turning your attention back to Ellen.

“Okay. First one...” She begins reading from her game cards. “Never have I ever had a crush on someone playing this game.”

Internally, you groan before you hold up your paddle with the white “I Have” side facing outward. Shawn does the same and Ellen holds up the blue “I Have Never.”

She raises an eyebrow at you. “It’s obviously you, Ellen,” you joke and she laughs before moving onto the next question.

“Never have I ever...drunk called an ex.” You hold up the blue side and you look over to see that Shawn is holding up the white side. Rolling your lips together you avoid his look. It was you that he called, but you didn’t answer and you got a drunk voicemail.

The game continues on for several more painful questions. You find it hilarious how Shawn answered that he has to most of the sexual questions and you hadn’t. It was nice to know that he was living it up as a celebrity for the past three years. The last question comes around and Ellen snickers when she reads it.

“Never have I ever had a song written about me.” She holds up her blue side and you scrunch your eyebrows together before holding up your blue side. “I don’t believe either of you.”

You look over and see that Shawn is holding up “I Have Never.” Holding back a laugh, you reach over and spin his paddle around in his hands. He looks up at you with a shocked expression. Then, his face sets in determination as he reaches over and turns yours over to the “I Have” side. Ellen and the crowd go nuts.

Shawn covers his mic with his hand. “You know that I wrote songs for you on my first album,” he reminds you.

“I genuinely forgot.” You shrug and you suddenly have a bad taste in your mouth. “I’ve been trying to forget a lot of things for the past three years, Shawn,” you say angrily. It gets quiet and you realize that you forgot to cover your mic.

“O...kay,” Ellen breaks the tension awkwardly and begins to close out the show. You stare at Shawn with hard features and the only thing running through his veins is guilt.

As soon as the cameras are off, you take your mic off and set it on the coffee table. “Thanks for having me, Ellen.” You smile and give her a hug before rushing backstage to get your things. You wanted to get out of there as soon as possible.

“Y/n, wait!” You hear Shawn calling your name as you brush last workers while hot tears build in your eyes.

You make it to your dressing room and begin gathering your things. Out of the corner of your eye, you see Shawn standing in the doorway. “God,” you groan. “Just go away, Shawn.”

“Please just talk to me,” he says softly. Stepping inside, he closes the door and walks toward you. “I made a mistake three years ago.”

As you zip up your bag, you turn to him. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“I never should have broken up with you like that.” You roll your eyes and pick up your bag. “No-I mean I never should have broken up with you at all.”

You sigh heavily, and a little bit of the tension drains from your body. “Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why are you suddenly realizing this now? Why, after all these years, do you want me back?” A couple of tears have fallen and you wipe them away hastily.

He looks down at his feet as he slowly approaches you. “I realized it the second you closed your car door. I wanted to take it back right then. But, the way you looked at me?” He pauses and when he speaks again his voice sounds like it’s about to crack. “It seemed like it was already too late.”

“I hate to break it to you, but you’re still too late Shawn.” You point out as you try to brush past him.

Shawn gently grabs your elbows and turns you toward him. His hands slide down your arms to hold your hands. “How am I too late? You’re single. I’m single. We live in the same city now-“

“Are you kidding me?” You say harshly as you pull your hands out of his. “You’ve been spending the past three years gallivanting around the globe hooking up with who knows how many girls. And I-I’ve just been by myself!” By the end of your rant, your voice was broken and sad.

“Y/n, I swear to god...none of those girls meant anything!” His voice is breaking and tears are welling in his eyes. “I was just trying to find some way to forget about you. And I know that’s a stupid excuse because it didn’t even work.” He breathes heavily and you realize at some point he placed his hands on your waist. “I’ve thought about you every single minute of every single day since I let you drive away and I get sick to my stomach thinking about you being with anyone else. I can’t stop writing songs about you. You’re the only thought in my head-“

Overcome with emotions, you lurch up and slam your lips into his. He doesn’t hesitate to snake his arms tighter around your and you tangle your hands in his perfectly-styled curls. His hands wander over your back while his lips move over yours magnetically. When your lungs start to burn, you pull back.

“No,” you whimper breathlessly. “You abandoned me, Shawn. We were best friends for our entire lives. When you broke up with me...I lost my best friend. All because you took the easy way out.”

Your hands rest on his chest and you try to push him away, but he grabs your hands and holds them to his heart. “I didn’t abandon you! I tried to reach out to you. Every birthday, every holiday, and even the past couple of days after I saw you on The Tonight Show.” His eyes search yours imploringly. “But, you’re the one who pulled away completely. Not me.”

“I...” Tears spill from your lashes and your lip quivers. “I’m sorry. I just-you really hurt me and I didn’t know how to be around you after that.”

He nods as his eyes close in relief before lowering his forehead to yours. “I know...I know. We both could’ve done things differently. Can we just start over?”

“No.” His eyes fly open to look into yours. “I don’t want to start over. I like our history...even the last three years because now we know better.” A timid smile peeks at the corner of your lips.

Shawn releases your hands to cup your cheeks. “You’re right. I really, really know better than to ever let you go again,” he breathes out. You bring your hands to the back of his biceps as he kisses you delicately. After several sweet moments, he pulls back abruptly.

“What? What’s wrong?” You ask worriedly.

He looks down at you with an elated grin. “Nothing. Everything is great. I just had the best idea, though,” he tells you.

“I’m intrigued. Go on.”

Licking his lips, he lets you in on his sudden idea. “Let’s be a duo.”

You laugh loudly. “What? What does that even mean?”

“You know!” He gently shakes your head with his hands. “Like a singing/songwriting duo! From now on it’ll be the two of us together!”

Shrugging your shoulders you sigh. “I don’t know, Shawn. I’m still at university for a couple of years...and I never really wanted to be a singer.”

“Neither did I! But it happened,” he reminds you.

You chuckle. “Well, yeah. But it suits you more.”

“Hmm,” he hums in thought as a concentrated look takes over his features. His eyes suddenly light up. “What if you were just my songwriter? You could still come with me places occasionally, but we’d get to write songs...and sing together privately,” he suggests.

Tilting your head to the side, you think. “It could work...”

“Yes!!” He cheers and picks you up to spin you around.

You giggle and hold onto him. “But, only after I finish university! It’s really important to me.” He sets you down and looks at you with the most loving face you’ve ever seen.

“Then, it’s important to me. I’ll be sure to visit you every time I’m home I’m Toronto,” he promises.

“You’re something else, Mendes.” You shake your head playfully, wondering how you started out the day with a hole in your heart and ended it with overflowing happy emotions.

He pulls you snugly against him and you wrap your arms around his middle. “I’m not half the something you are, y/l/n.” Your lips come together again fervently as Shawn’s hands tangle in your hair. Every nerve in your body felt like it was vibrating and you were so stupidly happy that talk show hosts are super nosy.

[sasukebarmitzvah]

watching every naruto opening and discussing my opinions because im bored liveblog

original

took me a little while to warm up to it idk why maybe because its not as up tempo and its a shonen and i want to get hype but i love it now. love the part where the camera pans around team 7 fighting randos they are babies… also its so funny when sasuke holds out his hand to naruto to help him out of the lake and he jsut fist bumps him. gay boy

Haruka fucking kanata baby!!!!!!!! a fav. like we all know this. i listen to the song just regularly a lot and every time it comes on shuffle im like Oh my god its haruka kanata. read the english translation of the lyrics… sns

this one got stuck in my head for a while lol. i like seeing everyone babie and i like naruto shaking his head at the end to dry off like a dog

DDMnanannaddnnaaaaa naaaaaaaaa nda aaWE ARE FIGHTING DEAMERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OOLI OLI OLIOOOOoohh!!!!! very fun very good also a very good time in the show, hello tsunade

**edgy shonen opening where theres something important in front of a chain link fence**

lol skipping 6-9 bc thats the huge chunk of filler which i didnt actually watch most of

shippuden

heros come back is SO GOOD absolutely one of my favs. banger first of all. i love how its actually choreographed and naruto sakura kakashi are like moving to the beat and i love the part where the animation is like pencil sketchy and theyre running and their bodies warp bro its just cool. the part where everyone dramatically reaches for gaara is fun, also love deidaras moment. anyway i shake my ass to this song eveyrday

distance oh god oh fuck. YOU ARE MY FRIEND!!! the sasuke and naruto stuff where they are little baby at the beginning at the end we return to the same place theyre there and like about to stab each other i’m going to scream. i lvoe the song of course. hello sai! i love team 7s little spotlight moments where they get to pose to the music its so cute. why is sasuke snake jesus? DO you remember that long lost DREAM!!!!!!!!!!

BLUE BIRD YA BANGER ok the whole symbolism. when naruto falling next to sasuke rising is positioned like yin and yang lol. when naruto is falling from the sky but then sasuke comes to mind and he springs into action lol. ok random people from the fillers i dont care about. naruto fell in the lake he picks up the bird feather interspersed with a couple shots of sasuke horgh. additional reading: paper bag by fiona apple

closer is one of the ones where im like eh its ok its not my favorite and then it gets to the chorus and my dumb ass is jsut screaming YOU KNOW THE CLOSER YOU GET TO SMETHING THE TOUGHTER IT IS TO REACHIT. the funniest part where narutos moping and thinking of sasuke and then he just perks up and smiles at the camera like. gay boy. like getting to see the asuma fight scenes in this op, also it was so funny seeing him get all the screentime in this op knowing hes about to die like yeah very subtle

SHA LA LA!!!! LOVE IT i love it i love it soooo much first of all banger second of all naruto looking into the water and his reflection is sasuke. lollllll. metaphor m-e-t-a-p-h-o-r the little prechorus bit in the middle gives me chills. love sasuke walking into the purple pool like a smug motherfucker thats my boy. at the end zooming into sasukes pupil zoom out it’s narutos eye oh the poetry..

signs another one of the ones where im like eh whatever its fine but not my fav but by the chorus i am standing on the table freaking out. like fuck jiraiya but this one got me a lil. the lighting and choreography of the sasuke itachi fight bit is sooooo nice and pretty, love getting to see all the new players in the story. baby ame orphans fading to the shot of yahiko as pain.. :(

this one literally makes me cry. i get chills what the fuck. definitely one of my favs. am i a bitch? maybe. i like the song by itself but like the way the rise/general shape of the melody flows with the visuals its like oh god oh fuck. again fuck jiraiya but like the role his character serves as a link between these disparate groups of people and the way thats used in this opening… how it starts and ends with him writing and this is the arc where naruto reads tales of a gutsy ninja and he learns about how he got his name and jiraiya wrote the book and hes WRITING and im going CRAZY!! i’m starting to tear up watching it rn. the shot of konan and the pains in that moment just before they leap forward. Sayonaaaaaaara aa lksasldfkwpoeifjhnuerIELFeuiertekdjsnlfweiourbg kakashis moment is cool in this op. also love to see the girls getting fight scenes in this op cus they sure dont in the actual show LOL anyway yeah im at the part where the melodys just hitting sooo different oh my god naruto frog eyes

DIVERRRRRRR. FAV literally like naruto is drowning. hes drowning and everyone is pushing him up so he can breathe again everyone is fighting to save him and thnen he s ouf ot the water and then he sees sasuke drowning and he JUMPS BACK IN. FOR ONE PERSON EVEN THOUGH ALL THESE OTHER PEOLE were working to help him out he dives back in for SASUKE whos drowning in the eyehole of obitos mask which is cool. ok yeah this is another one where im like tearing up because THe cymbal is em….. the way The movement of the visuals is choreographed with the song is so much. nico TOUCHED the fucking walls.

this one kinda annoys me i dont know why it just wasnt my favorite. love the sasuke and naruto staring at each other intensely moment though, would this be a shippuden opening without that. also the part at the end where sakura holds up her kunai and it like slashes and covers sasuke and naruto… inch resting…

newsongs so weird i love it. like what the hell is going on. why is naruto running like hes from some weird gmod video from 2013. love the LITERAL choreography, everyone dancing to the song like this is a musical. theres just a lot of weird moments which is fun. love sai naruto and sakura making the seal together to shoot lightning. raikage leaping gracefully across the beach

i do not enjoy this one. i just dont. it just feels like we’re bootlicking which of course we are because this is the war arc and everything is a nightmare

i remember seeing the first episode with this opening and i was excited bc its like… great another naruto pining for sasuke one this is what im here for. a light banger. minato manlet monday. ohh right this was the one where gaara sees his dad again and his OH I SEE SASUKEE

Banger! nico did indeed touch the walls again. i like that this one is like visually thematically consistent thru the whole thing, i like the nighttime dimly lit atmosphere with the bursts of brighter colorful lighting, also whenever i see tsunade i freak out. narutos cute at the end

SUCH A BANGER!!! also very cool visual style, appreciate it for that like the last one, its got that pretty consistent aesthetic with the red sky and the high contrast black blocking its fun and cool to watch. did i mention the song is a bit of a banger. obito passing thru the rock is cool too bad hes an idiot

ok from this one there were two lines i remember always seeing in the english sub that made me freak out. and one of them was like “this red hot love burning my heart” and it was over kakashi and obito fighting like damn OK. also the “i put the candle out with my finger” thing sticks in my head idk why. hate that we have the narutos big meaty claws i mean manly hands moment though. omg its hashirama and madara and then it CUTS TO SASUKE AND NARUTO IN THE SAME POSE LOL OK…

SILHOUETTE IS a banger… not as much so as some of the others but its a lot of fun. very colorful op, we got some naruto pining for sasuke, classic. also love the thing where ppl are running and they age as they do and they sort of grow into their present selves, a fun visual bit. the end where narutos like obito be nice now look at all these people behind me who think youre a meanie please be nice :(((((((((

another one with a really good visual principle ugh i love how the style of the show is integrated w the styles of more traditional printmaking its very swexy and nice to look at

LINE uugrgh i love this one, maybe a fav… naruto chasing after the light and sasuke trying so hard to snuff it out as they both reflect on their memories of each other oh god oh fuck… also i love the bits where it just has all the characters in a row like it reminds me of that one post about how in the endgame trailer they had a shot of all the female characters together to be like Girl power!! and someone was like yeah thats them showing u exactly how many women theyre going to disrespect LMAO but yeah i do love this op. also the song itself being slower w/ the triplet tempo is a nice change of pace

blood circulator hee hee… the version of this with naruto and sasuke moments is A Lot but even just the generic first version is fun. the part where narutos like knocked on his face hes sinking into the tar and hes not even trying to save himself hes just staring at sasuke, but then he sees sasuke distressed and he goes bijuu mode immediately like What did u say about my mans? there is some homoeroticism

i really hate everything about this i hate it all. sasuke is cute. thats it. ok first of all why did choji cut his hair his long hair look was so gooooooood. hinata bimboification? i mean if anything it was fun to watch these fillers just cus it was fun to watch kakashi be the hokage but really goofy and also the Crumbs tossed to the kakairus… but yeah i hate everything temari got bimbofied too like ugh please let her be a dyke :( this isnt even me talking necessarily about the opening this is me just being like i hate the naruto ending. LOL SASUKE AND NARUTOS NO HOMO BRO HIGH FIVE AT THE END LOLLLLL

ok im done

[the-story-of-five-lights]

Osaka dome fanaccount 180218

I’m writing this after getting some food in my stomach while sitting under the covers in my hotel room and looking out at the night lights in Osaka. I feel incredibly grateful I got to experience these concerts. I know what it’s like to be sitting at home streaming and wishing you could be there, because that’s usually where I am. And I know this time, even though there was a lot of apprehension, so many people wanted the chance to support SHINee in person. I’m thankful I got that opportunity, and I hope I was able to bring at least a portion of all of your well wishes for SHINee into the Dome along with me.

Today was so much easier. Infinitely easier. I’m sure there are people who won’t feel the same, but I feel lighter and more hopeful tonight than I did yesterday. I’ll try and write about some things I didn’t before so I’m not too redundant.

SHINee had an easier time tonight. I won’t pretend it wasn’t difficult for them or they don’t feel a huge weight of grief, but they smiled and were more at ease and teased at each other and clearly felt better than they did yesterday. Even if some smiles were forced, I don’t believe for a second they all were. Yesterday, pulling that band-aid off, made it impossible for them to hold the pain in, and today was a lot less raw.

Because SHINee seemed to be doing better — and probably because many of us knew what to expect — the mood of the concert was dramatically different. We were able to feed off each other’s energy and be more comfortable. Because of that, I was able to pay much more attention during the high energy and joyful parts of the concert today.

So, on to the concert itself:

The opening VCR is really beautiful. Whoever worked on it did an excellent job.

Colors of the Season was more stable vocally today. SHINee starts out standing in a line on stage with spotlights on them, and I realized it was the only time other than the end that they stood on the flat stage like that. During the song, the stage lifts them up high toward the lights before lowering them back down.

I didn’t talk about this before, but I really liked the medley of songs with the clock ticking in the background they played during the first break. It was a look back, and the way they edited the audio was really haunting. It hurt, because I couldn’t help but think of happier times, but I also don’t want to ever forget those memories. I liked that they had little audio snippets of their history. A reminder.

When they came out and started Stranger, the mood was already better than the 17th. I was seated about 10 feet from the middle track that they traveled down a lot and close to the front stage, so I could see their expressions well. The stage moved out towards the center and Key was faced toward my section. He went up close to the edge of the stage (this always makes me so nervous!!) and hyped us all up a lot. Right before the lights went out, he smiled at us, and I felt something loosen in my shoulders. It was clear that today would be different.

I saw a lot of people say Taemin seemed angry-sad yesterday, and I’d have to agree. I don’t think he was pissed, but he seemed closed off and like he was trying to focus on hitting his marks well. He already seemed more, I guess, normal at this point in the concert. He also started shedding clothes, so. You know. Definitely more back to normal. I saw the other members do something to perk him up a few times in like the first half hour of the concert, but after that he was running well on his own steam.

They had their short first ment, which had the same content as the first night but was nowhere near the same. Yesterday they stood in a stiff line with their hands folded together, often looking down when it wasn’t their turn to speak. Today, Onew smiled softly when he spoke (again, I felt such relief), and Key also seemed to have an easier time.

This next part, the Jonghyun tribute, was of course still hard, but I still found it easier than yesterday. I think this was in large part because I knew what to expect, but SHINee held it together the whole time and I think that also contributed. Kimi ga Iru Sekai was the most heart-wrenching for me. Just the image of them standing around the empty center platform is a lot. I saw Key mouth “I love you” when they turned to face Jonghyun’s spot. I thought I must’ve misunderstood because it definitely looked like I love you in English, but since he said it later I think it really must’ve been. It seems like he was doing that throughout the concert, because other people spotted him doing the same at different times.

If I didn’t love Diamond Sky before, I do now. Making that diamond shape has become absurdly meaningful, and raising up my hand alongside SHINee and the music and all the other Shawols in the crowd was so powerful. It’s not a feeling I want to forget any time soon.

The fanlights all changing color to a medley was next and was so cool. I love these wi-fi controlled lights and hope someone got a video of it for you guys. They did all sorts of cool things throughout the concert, like shifting into the shape of multi-colored stars across the stands and flashing like cameras and turning into a shifting rainbow along to Colorful.

SHINee came back out and performed Sherlock. This is one of the songs I thought would be difficult for them to cover, but they did a really good job both nights.

Love Like Oxygen was next, and I completely forgot about this yesterday but it was one of my favorite parts. They sing up to the bridge and then the music pauses and the lights dim. Some deep blue ones go on and the stage they’re on rises. They stay frozen in place and this eerie, haunting music reminiscent of the earlier “journey through our past” medley plays. Then Jonghyun’s vocals played out so clear and pure and echoed through the whole stadium. Only after that do the lights come back up and they continue on with the rest of the song. It was a beautiful, subtle tribute and indicative of how they did their best to incorporate him throughout the concert.

Hello was a lot of fun, and they were smiley and joking through all of it. Lots and lots of cute fanservice. Same for To Your Heart, and the crowd got really into it.

I wrote yesterday that the Dazzling Girl - Lucky Star - Downtown Baby trifecta was fun and one of the only happy parts of the concert. And I still feel they did a great job with it yesterday, especially in the context of such an emotionally harrowing concert. But today was ENTIRELY different. The girl next to me had also attended the day before, and we kept making big eyes at each other because it felt like we’d stepped into another concert altogether. I can genuinely say I had fun during these songs. After yesterday, I’d kind of been dreading the second day, but suddenly I had this big smile I couldn’t get rid of. SHINee was just out there giving it everything. Taemin was grinning and messing around with fans. He also shouted something at the beginning of one song, and I have no idea what it was but the whole place laughed. Which was really nice <3 Onew was pulling silly faces and waving his arms like crazy at everyone while going around on the carts. At the end of Lucky Star, he moved around the blocks (they got it on Star!) so that they said “Stay” then he hopped up on them and did that one move from Danger with his arms flung behind his back. He stayed like that for a good five long seconds too like a total goof. Key was being so sweet and soft to people he passed by and kept the energy up. He was far away from me the whole time, so I saw less of him sadly. I watched Minho a lot up in his hot air balloon, and he kept pointing to people and telling them to smile and then giving them a thumbs up and a firm, approving nod when they did it. He reminded me of a dad lol. He was really, really emotional and almost serious, kept putting his hand to his heart, and I could feel how much he loves us. Seriously.

Next was the dancers’ solo (which was good!) and then Hitchhiking which is still so. cool. The part where they’re on opposing stages coming closer together and having a dance-off… SO COOL. I was sat right in the middle of it so I got the perfect viewpoint. It’s almost like they’re each daring the other pair to go harder, and they got really into it. I don’t have too much to say about the rest of the songs in this part other than they definitely kept the energy up.

They went away for a while again and we chanted “SHINee”, and then Shaband came out and led us in clapping and starting to sing Sing Your Song. Still love this one at concerts <3 Yesterday, we only sang it a capella once, but today they had us keeping going just “once more” like four times. (Key helped us keep going when we faltered.) It was beautiful. The whole place was full of singing, and they stopped for a while and let us do it alone. Minho took out his in ear to hear better, and Taemin smiled really genuinely. Onew had sparkly eyes. You could tell they all wanted to hear it.

I’m With You was a return to something a bit more solemn. The lyrics have taken on a real poignancy. It almost feels like a message to Shawols.

There was another short ment, and once again they were more at ease than before. There were some small smiles and little laughs from shawols. They introduced the new song, and I’m looking forward to everyone getting to hear it clearly. It’s great and catchy, and I think I liked it even more the second time.

Then came Replay with all the old footage on the screens. It wasn’t just old performances of Replay — they had all sorts of meaningful moments like the first Tokyo Dome concerts, all the way back to debut days. This was still hard for me, and they didn’t look at all happy during it.

SHINee went around and did their bows and once again were smiling and waving soooo much at everyone. Much different from yesterday. They stood and talked, saying mostly the same thing as yesterday with a few additions. But their attitude was very different. They weren’t standing so stiffly in a line (like they were nudging each other and silently communicating things as they normally would more) and they spoke more comfortably.

Key said “I love you” to Jonghyun in English and sent kisses up to the sky. At one point, the others must have thought he was done talking, because they bowed and Key looked at them like “huh? what?” and shawols laughed.

After each one of them was done speaking everyone shouted their names loudly and cheered for an extended amount of time. I think everyone wanted to get across our support as much as we could. The cheers were especially loud for Onew.

Before they went backstage, we started chanting SHINee as loud as we could. Minho took out BOTH of his in-ears to listen and Taemin clapped his hands high in the air in approval. They waved goodbye and the curtain/partition came down to block them.

We kept chanting for them until they came out to perform the last song. As soon as the lights lit up the mic stands, people all over started shouting “Jonghyun”, just like we’d shouted for the others when they finished speaking during the ending ment.

This song will always be a gut punch. I knew by this point that they were singing “I’m by your side” and Jonghyun’s last line was “I’m by your side always”. This song hurt the most and there’s no contest. They performed it beautifully. At the very end, Key began to cry and put his head down. Minho looked at Jonghyun’s empty place while the recording of his voice played. He really had a rough time too, but not until they’d already finished singing. Yesterday we were silent (well, crying) while they put their roses on their stands and left, but today people shouted for them. I heard plenty of people shout “Jonghyun” again.

It’s a hard way to end the concert, although it’s fitting. The lights come up and they start playing other music, and you’re left there in this other headspace. I didn’t talk to anyone for a few minutes while I gathered myself.

So while today may not have been exactly easy as we might’ve used to think of it, it was definitely easier. There was more genuine happiness. Yesterday I was nearly left feeling like I couldn’t see a way forward, but not today. I’m feeling a lot more optimistic.

I’m glad I got to go to both shows. I think we all needed yesterday, even though it sucked. It didn’t feel good at all. But I think maybe we needed to let it out, all together, and I’m including SHINee in that. Having done that, it was like we were allowed to try and be a little happier. Yesterday was straight-up raw, barren, cold pit in the stomach grief. Today still had a lot of sad, but it was at least a little bit more peaceful feeling. There were still moments where I felt pretty scraped up. But we’re always going to have those.

I hope if you were listening along you could feel the energy change. It was really palpable. Shawols were more ready, and SHINee seemed more ready too. They really managed to turn an experience I was dreading — after that first day, I wasn’t sure I could do it — into something beautiful and touching and honestly, genuinely fun for good parts of it.

Please don’t mind me getting a little personal here, but sometimes I have doubts. I trust SHINee a lot, and I find that they’re generally very open and honest with us. But occasionally I’ll have a little niggling doubt that they’re just saying something because they feel like they have to. I know it’s k-pop — I know that’s not uncommon.

But there are a few things I know for a fact after all of this:

They love each other. (Although I never doubted this)

They love us.

They love this group and treasure what it means to them.

I know that’s all true.

I can’t predict the future, and it’s all scary right now. But I can at least hold on to those things. They tried so hard to reassure us through these concerts, and I think they were also trying to reassure themselves. I hope we did enough for them. I don’t know if we can right now. Before they went off stage, Minho and Taemin put up their pinkies in a promise and we put ours up in return. I really want to keep that promise, no matter what.

They did Jjong proud. I didn’t have a lot of expectations one way or another going in to this. I just wanted to be there. But the concert was put together beautifully and thoughtfully. They did this unimaginably difficult thing with so much bravery, and my heart’s full because of it. I think I cried more writing all this up than I did all day today, just because I’m so incredibly touched by what I saw. I keep having images flash through my head of their earnest expressions, and their smiles, and their little moments of communicating with shawols. I’m in awe of what a special, unique thing we have.

I’ll join the streaming crowd next week for the Tokyo concerts. Until then and forever, let’s keep doing what Minho asked and remember Jonghyun, our wonderful, shining diamond in the sky and fifth member of SHINee.

[i-have-a-dc-problem]

In Her Arms, Chapter Two

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16219166/chapters/37981061#workskin

Jason had awoken once more to the sunlight piercing his room through the window he loved to sit in. "Master Jason," Alfred called from the hall. "It's time for school!" Jason had had trouble leaving his bed in the mornings at first, but he complied and walked to his wardrobe. "I'm up, Al, I'm up." He dressed in his Gotham Academy uniform which he despised at first sight. It was tight, itchy and stiff. Jason knew, however, that this school wasn't something he could pass up. He wanted to the best education he could get his hands on. Might as well, right? He'd probably never get a chance like this again. "Make the best of it," he smiled to his reflection in the mirror as he tied his tie. He grabbed his bag and headed down to the stairs to the parlor. He stood still as Alfred attempted to comb the boy's thick black hair.

"Forget it," Jason said, impatiently. He waved his hands above his head, disrupting Alfred's. Alfred took a step back and followed the boy to the kitchen, but he knew Jason was nervous. Alfred had already prepared breakfast, and Bruce joined them, dressed in one of his work suits. "Morning, Alfred. Morning, Jay," he smiled. Jason smiled at his father, taking a break from his strawberries and cream oatmeal.

"Morning, Bruce," he replied, but a bit of oatmeal came flying out, landing on Bruce's jacket. Jason's eyes widened in fear. Bruce looked at Jason, and laughed. "Gotta remember to swallow before you speak," he said.

"You're rather lucky, Master Jason. Whenever Master Bruce would speak with food in his mouth, his parents had me smack his bottom," Alfred laughed. Bruce rolled his eyes and smiled. He went upstairs to change blazers, and soon returned.

Jason had finished breakfast, and they headed to the Rolls Royce. Alfred sat in the driver's seat, as usual, and Bruce joined Jason in the back. "Nervous?" Bruce asked.

Jason was quiet, but he nodded. "Yeah," he finally spoke as Alfred started the engine and pulled out of Wayne Manor. "It's okay to be nervous, Jason. You're strong, you're smart, and you're brave. You can handle it."

Jason's quivering lips softened and curled into a smile. His blue eyes beamed with confidence. He nodded softly and looked up at Bruce. "I'll give it my all, old man," he smirked.

Bruce smiled back. "Good to hear. Now, let's do something about about that hair." He pulled out a comb and parted Jason's hair down the middle, curling up at the corners of his forehead. "How's that look?" he asked the boy.

Jason pulled out his phone and looked at his reflection in the front facing camera. "I look a hellova richer than I did a few weeks ago," Jason chuckled. "It'll do just fine." Alfred parked the car. "We've arrived, sirs," Alfred spoke. "Ready, champ?" Bruce smiled. Jason nodded and hugged Bruce before bolting out of the car. Alfred and Bruce smiled as the boy raced up the stone steps leading up to the Gotham Academy.

Bruce looked on with pride, and a bit of worry. He wondered how other kids would treat him, and how he'd react. Jason hid his anger well, but kids could be cruel. Bruce shook off the thought as Alfred pulled out into traffic, now headed for Wayne Enterprises. "As you said yourself, Master Bruce, he'll be fine."

Jason roamed the halls memorizing his surroundings and getting his bearings. He felt eyes upon him from his peers. Their stares pierced him as their whispers infiltrated his mind. "That's the new kid?" "I hear Bruce Wayne found him in a gutter." "I dunno, he's kinda cute." "Dick was cuter." "Nah, I heard he's killed a guy befor-" Jason couldn't take it. He held his head high, braving the world and walked to the nearest bathroom. He looked at himself, into his own eyes. "Everything is what you make of it, Todd. Even you, err, me. Whatever. We got this." He stepped out and struck up a conversation.

"So you're the newest heir to the Wayne fortune?" Cindy Highmore asked him, Lucy Westminster right beside.

"It probably depends on how I behave," he said, showing off his cocky grin. The girls giggled. "Say, it's my first day. Mind showing me around?" Jason asked politely. The girls agreed and each took one of his hands, leading him down each and every hall. Jason felt more powerful than ever. He knew he wasn't ugly, but the thought that he was cute hadn't occured to him. Mrs. Walker would pinch his cheeks and give her two cents, but Jason was no more than a tyke then. He had no idea how he remembered that, let alone Mrs. Walker herself.

"Soooo this is the gymnasium, and over here is the science wing, biology, chemistry, geology, physics, you name it," Lucy spoke up. They led him all over the school, showing him the art room, all of the literature and language art rooms next. After showing him the mathematics department, they pulled him out of view from the hall, and Lucy and Cindy pecked Jason's lips. Jason stood there, stunned. His face ran red, and he went to the office to get his schedule.

Even though Jason had said nothing of it, the girls had spread it through the school like wildfire. Jason was still uncomfortable with the attention. By lunchtime, he had his tray in hand, and sat at a table with friends he made in English Literature. He was chowing down on his food when some older kids came to the table.

"Are you Jason Todd-Wayne?" One young man asked. His newfound friends ran, scared.

Jason kept eating, not even looking up. "That's what it says on my underwear, more or less.

He grabbed Jason's collar and lifted him off the ground. "You have insulted the Highmore name, and the honor that comes with!"

"Normally, at this point, I would ask 'What did I do?', but let's be honest. You're obviously a tool and I have enjoyed upsetting you. I mean look at you. Blonde hair, blue eyes, a voice like Thurston Howell the Third. You're like a villain out of a cheesy '80's movie. What are you gonna do, tear down the ski lodge my ragtag orphanage friends go to?" His friends start to snicker, and he gets angrier still.

"You little shithead! Do you know who I am?!" He roared.

"Honestly, I don't know and I don't care. I've just been stalling until someone of authority shows up. Gotta pick your fights, pal. Oh, and by the way, your sister and her friend kissed me. I didn't make the first move," Jason replied. Highmore was baffled as some teachers ran in. "What did you think was gonna happen? That I was gonna challenge you to a duel? Please." Andrew Highmore let go of Jason. "This isn't over!" he snapped. "Yes it is," Jason replied as Andrew was sent to the Dean's office.

Jason let out an exasperated huff and sat down to finish his lunch. "Entitled prick," he muttered under his breath.

The next period they had physical education. Jason had been looking forward to it. His blood had already been pumping. Unfortunately, he and his classmates were instructed to watch videos, explaining how to play the sport they would do for the next two weeks. To make matters worse, it was croquet.

The final bell of the day rang, and Jason left. He felt eyes of someone on him. He looked around, to find Andrew Highmore glaring at him from a third story window. Jason promptly hooked each side of his mouth, stuck out his tongue, and crossed his eyes at him. Jason looked for the Rolls Royce, but didn't see him. He shrugged and started walking home, back to Wayne Manor. It wasn't long after that Bruce and Alfred pulled up to the school, completely forgetting that they had a child. Bruce ran all around the block, looking for Jason.

Jason was already 3 blocks away. "He's a CEO," he shrugged as he talked to himself. "He's probably working hard, doing... hell, I don't know what CEOs do, but it's important." Jason kept stepping when a car pulled up. "Jason!" A voice called out. The boy turned his head and saw Bruce. "Where were you? I was worried sick!"

"I was just walking home from school," he shrugged. "Don't kids normally do that kind of thing?"

"Not when the walk is 14 miles!" Bruce said, wrapping his arms around the boy. "I'm sorry, Jason. The time slipped away from me. I-"

"It's okay. I get it," Jason replied. "Let's go home?"

Bruce nodded and helped him into the car. "So, how did school go today?"

"Well, to be honest, there was a lot more drama than I was expecting," he sighed. "Why do white kids have to be so damn dramatic?" The willpower it took for Alfred to not laugh, especially at Bruce, could have earned him a Green Lantern's power ring, but a knowing smirk shined through.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Bruce asked. Jason shrugged. "Well, these two girls were showing me around, and then they kissed me. I wasn't expecting it, but you won't hear me complain," he blushed. Bruce was surprised. "Well, they told like all of their friends and it got back to her older brother, and he got pissed on me. 'A plague upon thine house,' quoth the dweeb, or something like that. He got detention for putting his hands on me so he's probably gonna try something again."

"Well, I know a thing or two about bullies," Bruce smiled. "If you want, I could show you a few moves. A little bit of fencing, a little bit of boxing, or your Uncle Oliver can come down from Star City to show a few things with a bow and arrow if things get too out of hand," Bruce chuckled.

Jason thought on it, and nodded. "Yeah, better safe than sorry." Bruce smiled and nodded. "We'll lace up some gloves as soon as we get home. Besides, I have a few secrets I want to tell." Jason nodded again, with a smile, and looked out the window for the rest of the ride, watching Gotham get just a little smaller than it already was.

[wrestlewriting]

Valentine’s Challenge Fic

Soooo....this isn’t long. ~1000 words. And it’s just something cute and sweet and nothing all that amazing. But sometimes that’s how writing goes. I’m just proud I managed to write anything right now. It’s barely proofread; sorry not sorry.

Thank you @sjwrites22 for the prompt and challenge.

I honestly had no idea who to tag because it’s been so long since I’ve posted a story. So uh, yea.

@castielscamander @spine-buster @running-ropes  @allhailthe-demonking @chasingeverybreakingwave @sjwrites22 @thedeboniardevistation  @nopeitsnat  @theprestigious0ne  @pjanina13 @alexahood21 @tyferbebe  @thegenericluchadora ​

“They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.” 

A park. 

Roderick Strong.

“You’re giving me anxiety,” Roderick stated, as Leah continued to move about the hotel room, checking and rechecking her purse and the diaper bag.

“Well, maybe if you help me, you’ll feel better,” she retorted, making sure once again there was the right food and snacks in the tiny cooler.

“I am helping. I’ve got the kid,” he replied, using his free hand to motion towards their son, who was happily sitting on his father’s lap, watching a Daniel Tiger video on the iPad.

“Whatever,” Leah rolled her eyes. “I think I got everything so we’re good to go.”

“Go?” The almost-two-year-old wasn’t incredibly talkative, but he knew the important words. Like go, and mama, and eat.

“Yea baby, let’s go to Disneyland because mama isn’t stressed out enough in life!”

“You are so dramatic,” Roddy declared, as Caleb scrambled from his lap. He didn’t even take his eyes off her as he helped the toddler down from the bed, just knowing what needed to be done.

“Am I though? Disneyland is crazy and packed and the general population is typically a mess.”

“It’s February. It won’t be like it is in like, June.”

“I’ll give you that,” she agreed, shifting her purse onto her shoulder. Roddy took the backpack diaper bag, slinging it over his one shoulder. Their son was already standing at the door, his favorite stuffed tiger in his arms, ready to leave.

The trip from the hotel to the amusement park, if it could even be called that anymore based on the sheer size of it, wasn’t terrible. California traffic was typical but manageable. Both Roderick and Leah were used to it, having both spent several years working indy shows, usually PWG, in the area.

That was the main reason they were in town currently. Leah was making her return to PWG after taking the last few years off while pregnant and raising their child. Their family was based in Florida as Roddy worked for WWE. She’d competed in the Mae Young Classic months earlier, but other than that hadn’t been on wrestling shows. She was nervous and excited about the weekend. Roddy being with her made it better, and she was excited for Caleb to experience his first PWG show. She anticipated having to get him some noise-canceling headphones though.

By the time they’d parked and gotten up to the entrance gates, it had been over an hour since they left the hotel. Caleb was clearly getting impatient in line as he was able to tell something big was in front of him, full of colors and adventures and things he could get into.

She had a sudden understanding of backpack leashes.

Leah had wrangled him into her arms several times, but eventually, Roddy had to scoop him up and hold him tight as they made their way officially inside. He talked animatedly to their son as they walked along, telling the child all the things he’d see as if he truly understood.

While not bringing his stroller had seemed like a good idea, as it was just easier to carry him, she missed being able to strap him in and be done with it. But Roddy seemed to be doing alright containing him as they got further inside.

It was going to be a long day though Leah decided, looking around at the various buildings, the castle, the rides, both close and in the distance.

“They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.” Roderick’s statement brought her attention back to the present. He was glancing over at her, as was Caleb. Both had blank looks on their faces, clearly unimpressed with their woman’s lack of enthusiasm.

“Ha, ha,” Leah stated, her tone matching their looks. “It’s just…overwhelming. Even for adults. How is he gonna handle all this today?”

“Stop worrying so much,” Roddy ordered. “Dang woman, just have fun.”

“But what if…” Her motherhood-induced-anxiety wasn’t so easily tamed.

“Stop,” he cut her off. “Stop. We’re going to the freakin’ tea cups and you’re gonna enjoy yourself.” Leah had to laugh at his words.

“That’s probably the most violently the teacups have ever been talked about.”

Roddy just smiled, taking her hand in his, leading her towards the aforementioned destination. It wasn’t as crowded as she had feared. And she appreciated Roddy’s plan of starting towards the back of the park and working forward.

As soon as Caleb saw the ride, his eyes grew wide. He fell silent as Roddy set him to the ground, and appeared mesmerized by the attraction.

“See? Kid likes ‘em.”

“Kid isn’t even two. There’s colors and movement. Disney knows how to attract kids. It’s kind of their whole deal. Also, watching is not the same as riding.”

“He’s my kid. He’s gonna love anything we go on today. The faster, the better.”

“The slower, the better chance Mama’s gonna let him.”

“Yea, yea,” Roddy waved her off, causing her to glare, to which he just grinned in response. “Loosen up, woman. Today is meant to be a fun family day for us. We never get to do these kinds of things a lot. It’s never too early to start making memories, even if they’re just gonna be for us.”

Leah wanted to continue being a worrying mama, but with what he said, she couldn’t. He was right. This was meant to be a day of love and laughter, not a day that she would be able to 100% control. She just couldn’t help but be a bit high strung; this was the most crowded and active place they’d ever taken Caleb. There were hundreds of ‘what ifs’ that had been running through her mind for weeks.

“I never got to do this stuff as a kid. I wanna make sure Caleb gets to experience all the coolest stuff in the world we can give him,” Roddy stated.

And with that, Leah had no choice but to try to keep an upbeat attitude throughout the day. This was going to be fun, their faces were going to hurt from all the smiling. If Caleb had a meltdown at some point, they’d manage it. If Roddy or Leah had a meltdown at some point, well, they could also go over to the Adventure Park for a beer. They had bought hopper passes after all, just in case.

“C’mon, let’s do the damn thing,” Roddy declared, again taking her hand, having already lifted up Caleb, as they made their way through the line and into the attraction.

“Alright, alright,” she conceded, following along behind her boys. “Just, don’t spin us so fast we get sick.”

“No promises.”

[bootypopper]

The 2nd December 2017 I had a terrible dream, or should I say nightmare. I don't remember most of it but close to its end; I am depressed, I hear about a trend of kids inhaling candle fumes and then dying suddenly. I then see a candle and without thinking I am over it and quickly inhale its fumes. Immediately, I slump into the ground, face down, and I feel my whole body become numb. As if my soul is slowly leaving my body. At that moment I felt a slight relief, but then I am consumed with regret as I see my mother plead and scream "No!No!Please NO!". I couldn't move and there was no turning back. I was dying. When I woke up, I felt more determined than ever to stay alive, to live my life to the fullest and never EVER place my mother in such position.  Now its Monday, 18th of December 2017 and I find out that a great artist and influencer of my life ended his life after struggling with his battle against depression. Kim JongHyun passed after inhaling fumes from a burnt brisket, consequently suffering from carbon monoxide poisoning. Like myself, fans and individuals all over the world were caught in disbelief and surprise to have lost such an amazing person to mental illness.  I spent my day remembering how Jonghyun impacted my life. I remembered being introduced to Kpop by my high school friends with Shinee's 'Ring Ding Dong' music video. It was all new to me. I probably commented how Jonghyun resembled a girl with his longish blond hair. That was the beginning of a whole new perpective. Thanks to that perfectly sounding "Babay~" I was interested and that interest only grew and developed to this wonderful love I have for Kpop and Korean culture as a whole.  I remembered getting my first taste of Korean reality shows through Shinee's 'Hello Baby'. I remembered wainting hours infront of Abbey Road Studios back in 2011 to get a glimpse of Onew, Key, Jonghyun, Minho and Taemin in British soil. I remembered how much my young brother loved the Ring Ding Dong song and how hard he danced to it during his Christening/Birthday party, making everyone so happy.  I must say that over the years I developed my own problems with depression. During that time I distanced myself from everything and everyone; friends, family, music, work, school, life. I chose not to be positively influenced by Jonghyun's or any other artist's work. I broke myself down and refused to set a new foundation. I was a lost soul and I accepted my end.  31st December 2016 I took a bunch of Anadin Extra packs I had at home and put then in my handbag. I had planned to leave the house, travel as far as I could and then consume them all in one go. I was on the hedge that day and an unnecessary argument with my mum resulted in me leaving the house suddenly with nothing but my coat, phone and debit card. I was so triggered but I couldn't do anything. I had left my bag at home. I contemplated suicide for so long before, that on the day I planned to die I could only think about the aftermath. How will they react when they find out? How will it affect them in the long term? I don't want to hurt anyone, I'm just sick of how useless I am. They'll be better off without me. They won't have to see how pathetic I look anymore. All I do is bring pain and disappoint. I don't deserve their love. I wondered around for hours and entered 2017 on my own ...in the middle of a bunch of strangers, watching the London fireworks. I can't remember what I was thinking at that time, but I guess I had given myself another chance. I know exactly how Jonghyun felt. It's the worst feeling of hopelessness you could ever have and it's all consuming. The truth is that I will never get over my depression but I will not allow it to get me to were I was the afternoon of New Years eve 2016 or the day I didn't go to school and sent a 'help me' letter to my teacher. I am still young and I have soooo much to give and receive. I am a special human being and I will bring hope and joy to you who may be experiencing the despair Jonghyun and I felt. I keep surviving and he remains alive through his music, craft, advice and countless memories. You too are strong and will continue to spread endless positivity in this beautiful Shinee world. You can do it. Earlier I posted: Jonghyun was one of those entertainers that exuded such happiness and positivity that you could hardly imagine him going through such hard times. I too considered myself to be a happy person and I'm sure my friends and family felt the same. Unfortunately, I let myself go and all of a sudden I lost all interest in life. If you don't understand that feeling, consider yourself a very lucky person and pray to never EVER feel that way. I could have been in his position at the beginning of this year and I am proud and extremely glad that I am  still here, today, looking forwards to another year. If you feel the slightest depressed, do not hold on to that feeling. Let it go. Speak to someone, anyone. Send me a message if you want. I may be a stranger but what I have to say may help you live another day. We failed Jonghyun but there are a lot more souls out there that need saving. I admit that this news is a trigger for me, although I only saw him through the eyes of a fan, it is extremely unfortunate that I now feel closest to him by knowing exactly how he felt in his last moments. I am crying but I don't grieve this Star with sadness, despite the unknown, Jonghyun brought lot of hope and joy to many of us along his short life. I Thank God for bringing such an individual to our lives and I wish that Kim Jong Hyun Rests In Pure Peace in Shinee World. His final letter read: I’m broken on the inside. The depression that slowly gnawed away at me eventually devoured me. I couldn’t overcome it. I hated myself. I resolved to hold on to memories and shouted at myself to come to my senses, but there was no answer. If there is no way to relieve stifling breath, it’s better to just stop. I asked who can be responsible for me. It’s only you. I was utterly alone. It’s easy to say you’re going to end things. It’s hard to actually end things. I lived with that difficulty this whole time. You told me that I wanted to escape. That’s right. I wanted to escape. From me. From you. You asked who is over there. I said it was me. I said it was me again. And I said it was me again. I asked why I keep forgetting my memories. You told me it was because of my personality. I see. I see that everything is my fault in the end. I hoped that people would notice but nobody knew. You never met me so of course you would not know I was there. You asked why I live. Just because. Just because. Everyone just lives just because. If you ask why people die, they would probably say it’s because they’re exhausted. I suffered and agonized about it. I never learned how to turn this pain into happiness. Pain is just pain. I tried to push myself past it. Why? Why am I keeping myself from putting an end to it all? I was told to search for the reason why it hurts. I know all too well. I’m hurting because of me. It’s all my fault, because I was born this way. Doctor, is this what you wanted to hear? No. I didn’t do anything wrong. When you told me in that calm voice that it’s because of my personality, I thought how easy it must be to be a doctor. It’s almost fascinating, that it hurts this much. People that have it harder than me seem to get along just fine. People weaker than me get along just fine. But that must not be true. Among the people in this world, no one has it harder than me, and no one is weaker than me. But I still tried to live. I asked myself why I had to do so hundreds of times, and it was never for me. It was for you. I wanted to do something for me. Please stop telling me things you don’t understand. You tell me to figure out why I’m having a hard time. I told you several times why. Am I not allowed to be this sad just for those reasons? Does it have to be more specific and dramatic? Do I need to have better reasons? I already told you. Were you even listening? Things you can overcome don’t remain as scars. I guess I was not meant to confront the world. I guess I was not meant to lead a life in the public eye. That’s why it was hard. Confronting the world, and being in the public eye. Why did I make those decisions. It’s ridiculous. It’s great that I even made it this far. What more can I say. Just tell me I did well. Tell me I did well enough and that I went through a lot. Even if you can’t smile while sending me off, don’t say it’s my fault. You did well. You really went through a lot. Goodbye.

[caindoglover]

Rebound

All the tagged ships really are in here.

This is my first try at writing any of these characters, so don't be too hard on me. I really wanted to do a series of escalating moments like this and since I can't draw, I wrote it. Thus no scene is super long, but they are all very much linked.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12715395/1/Rebound

Enjoy!

“I’m baaaaaack!” Star calls out to anyone who might be listening, Marco in particular. She prances across the room and towards the stairs.

Marco pops into view at the top of the stairs. “Hey, Star. You look happy.” He smiles as he makes his way down. “So how was it? Was it as miserable as you said it would be? Or did you,” he gasps and lays his hands over his mouth for dramatic effect, “have fun?”

Star swats at him, smiling despite herself.

Marco laughs. “Honestly though, I don’t know how you could not like that stuff. I mean…pretty dresses, free food, dancing, and-”

“Dancing!” Star’s eyes light up and she grabs Marco’s wrist. “Marco! Marco!” She jumps up and down. “Tom and I – we got back together.”

Marco’s face goes blank. “What?”

Star releases him and waves her hand about as she says, “Yeah, we had to dance cause royalty stuff and it was actually nice. Soooo much better than that Blood Moon Ball thing. So we decided we’d try again.”

“Oh. Really?” Marco’s brow creases as he contemplates her.

Star frowns. “What’s wrong?” A mischievous glint shines in her eye. “You jealous?” She nudges him.

“No.” Marco rubs the back of his neck. “It’s just that, it’s sudden. I mean, not for him, the guy’s totally in love you.” He half laughs. “But for you…you hated the guy just hours ago.”

Star shrugs. “Love’s a crazy thing.” She skips past him and up the stairs, her eyes lingering on him as long as she can manage before she goes around the corner.

Marco watches her go, thinking hard on her words, and as she disappears his frown lifts and he too shrugs. “I guess so.”

…

Marco steps through the portal and into Tom’s bedroom.

“What’s up, dude?” Tom smiles and looks to Marco with his third eye while keeping his others firmly planted on the video game in front of him. His fingers tap away as he completes combo after combo.

“That ball landed on our usual game day, so I figured I’d come today instead.”

“Yeah, sure, just gimme a second.” His tongue sticks out in his concentration as he mashes out another combo. Another. Another. “Yes!” He throws his hands in the air. “In your face!”

Marco snickers. “You get way to into these games.” He strides over.

“No, you don’t get into them enough.” Tom snaps his fingers and another chair appears besides him. “That’s why I always beat you.” He smirks.

“No, you win because you cheat.” Marco plops down next to him.

“Rude.” Tom swishes his hand and floats the second controller into Marco’s hands. “It’s not my fault my games are made for demons.”

Marco rolls his eyes but smiles anyway. “Just hit start.”

They play through at least ten rounds before Marco stops counting and loses himself in the fighting. After that he isn’t sure just how long they go back and forth, all he knows is he wins a grand total of one time. One. Well, it’s a record he supposes. Although he has a sneaking suspicion Tom let him win so he’d keep playing.

Tom grins. “Ready to give up yet?”

“You realize that for most people beating them into the ground usually ends with them not wanting to play with you ever again, right?” Marco raises a brow.

Tom chuckles. “Yeah, well you aren’t like most people, now are you?” His smile falters as a thought crashes into his brain. “I mean, most people wouldn’t have even forgiven me in the first place.” He drops his eyes to the floor.

Marco’s brows knit together and his eyes shine with sadness. Lingering on bad thoughts is never good, particularly not for Tom, so he doesn’t try and cheer him up, instead he switches tracks entirely. “So,” he stretches out the word, “you and Star, huh?” He tilts his head.

Tom pauses for a long moment, still caught somewhere in the moments before, and then his face lights up like a firework. “She told you?” He half laughs. “Honestly, I almost thought she was making fun of me at first.” He rubs the back of his neck. “I mean, before that dance I was pretty sure she hated me. But…that dance…” He smiles fondly. “It was just like before.” His heart beats a little faster.

“I’m glad you’re happy.” Marco smiles.

“You say that like you’re not.” Tom shoots him a dubious look. “What? You jealous?” His cautiousness shifts to humor and he grins.

“Oh my God.” Marco throws his hands in the air. “If one more person says I’m jealous I swear to Mewni. I am not jealous.” He scowls.

“Chill, dude.” Tom laughs. “I’m just kidding.”

“I just think it’s sudden. Just like you said. And I don’t want things to blow up, you know?” He shrugs.

“It’s okay. I’ll be okay.” Tom’s eyes muddy despite his words. “Even if we don’t last. I’ll be happy I got even this much time.”

Marco nods and smiles despite the feeling stirring deep within him.

“Still, don’t be so negative. That’s my thing.” Tom nudges Marco. “It doesn’t suit you.”

Marco chuckles and his smile turns genuine. “Just like winning doesn’t suit me apparently.”

“Now you’re getting it.” Tom bobs his head. “Another round?”

“Another round!”

…

“Double date! Double date!” Star bounces in place, her dress rising and falling with her. This time it is blazing red, a single simple color that makes her pop amongst the furniture around the house.

Marco walks down the stairs and falters as he sees her in her fancy dress and with her hair held back in a barrette. “Oh, um, you’re going like that?”

Star’s eyes flit to her dress and back to him. She puffs out her lip. “What’s wrong with my dress?”

Marco shakes his head. “Nothing. Just…was I supposed to dress up?”  He gives a nervous smile and tugs at his hoodie. “I thought this was gonna be more…chill,” he stretches the word out and slides his hands in a smooth line.

“Dresses can be chill.” Star waves her wand and a splash of pictures appear on her dress – bunny, dog, and cat faces, rainbows, clouds, and a heart right on her chest. “See? Chill,” she mimics his tone and movement.

Marco shifts from one foot to the other. “Well, I guess-”

“Good. Let’s go!” She snatches him by the wrist and races out the door. They run all the way to the restaurant where they find Jackie waiting.

“Oooh, nice dress.” Jackie smiles at Star. “Next time I’ll wear mine and we can match, yeah?” Jackie tilts her head.

Star beams. “Yeah.”

Marco eyes Star’s hand still curled around his wrist and he frowns. There’s no way she doesn’t realize it. Still, no need to fuss. He simply tugs his hand out of hers and brushes it off.

A trace of a scowl lights Star’s face as she notices Marco brush his wrist off.

Marco looks to Jackie, a renewed smile on his lips. “You, um, you look pretty. Even without a dress.” He smiles bashfully.

Jackie giggles. “You’re as sweet as ever.” She steps forward and kisses him on the cheek.

Star looks pointedly away and grumbles beneath her. No, it’s cool. Tom will be here any second now. He’ll-

A burst of flames appear and when it subsides Tom stands before them. “Hey.” He gives a slight wave.

“Tom!” Star leaps at him and throws her arms around his neck.

Tom catches her around the waist and draws her close. “Missed you too, Starship.” He leans his head down toward her.

Star stretches up and brushes her nose against his in an eskimo kiss.

Tom lowers her so her feet touch the ground. “Beautiful as always.” His smile is tender.

Star giggles, a soft blush coloring her cheeks. “You’re looking pretty spiffy there too.” She smiles coyly. He is wearing the same suit as the night of the Blood Moon Ball.

Jackie looks Tom over. “So, you’re the demon dude, right?”

Tom eyes her with uncertainty. “Uh, yeah. That’s me. And you are…?”

“Jackie.” She wraps her arm around Marco’s shoulder. “Marco’s girlfriend.”

Marco smiles sheepishly. He still isn’t quite used to her calling them boyfriend and girlfriend. It’s nice, definitely, but it never fails to knock him off kilter.

Star’s eyes snap open and her face lights up. “Hey! Marco!” She nabs her phone from her pocket and tosses it at him.

Marco yelps and scrambles to catch it, fumbling with it before finally clamping his hands around the device. He makes a face at her.

Star laughs and grins from ear to ear. “Take a pic of us, okay?” She leans her head against Tom and nuzzles into the crook of his neck.

Marco frowns, but he does as she says. He lifts the phone and snaps a shot, capturing their moment of sentiment.

Jackie peeks over his shoulder. “You two are super cute.” She nods to them. “You match and everything. Same as me and Marco. We’re like the perfect couples.”

“Power couples.” Star pipes, waving her wand. “We’ve got the powers.”

“And we’ve got the couples?” Jackie laughs.

Star laughs with her.

Marco opens his mouth to speak and reaches out to offer Star her phone back, but he doesn’t get a chance to accomplish either.

Star loops his arm through Tom’s and tugs him forward. “Alright, alright, enough of this. Let’s go eat. I hunger!” She throws a hand in the air.

“Yeah, come on Marco.” Jackie slips her hand into his and draws him along.

Marco tries to fidget with his fingers and is made all the more aware of the phone still in his grasp. He tilts the device and glances down at the image. It stares right back. What was the point of taking this if she wasn’t even going to look at it? Maybe the excitement of it all has affected her focus, causing her mind to flit from one thing to the next even quicker than usual. He’d like to think that. But it isn’t just that. She was unusually affectionate just now. He has never seen her dating someone, sure, but something about it just didn’t feel right. It didn’t feel like Star.

“Marco?” Jackie’s voice breaches his thoughts.

Marco blinks and shakes away his daze. He looks up to meet Jackie’s eyes. “Sorry, what?”

“Time for your order, dude.”

“O-Oh, right, yeah, for sure.” He shoves the phone in his pocket, shoves it out of his mind. He won’t let his weird insecurities mess this night up. So what if she forgot the phone! So what if she is being extra lovey! Love does crazy things. He has to believe those words.

…

Marco hops from his bed to go grab something to eat. Probably nachos so he can continue to play his video game. Plus it isn’t quite time for lunch. As he makes his way to the stairs he pauses halfway through passing Star’s room and peers in.

Star sits crisscross on her bed and right beside her is Tom. She has her hand held out to him as she stays more still than Marco has ever seen her.

Tom is intent, his gaze set on her fingernails as he works.

Oh. Fingernail painting. Marco smiles. Cute. He moves to keep going, but the slight movement is all it takes.

Star gasps and pops her head up. “Oh, Marco. Marco, look!” She jerks her hand away from Tom and tilts it forward so Marco can get a better look. “Tom’s doing my nails. Isn’t he the sweetest?” Her eyes shine.

Marco goes to answer immediately. Yeah, of course it’s sweet. Because of course it is. Only…those eyes. They stop him. There’s a hint of something there, and it isn’t happiness. Hope, maybe? A hope directed at him. Does she want his approval? It’s never seemed to matter one way or the other before…before…her crush. He stifles a grimace. No, stop it. He needs to stop thinking like this.

“Helloooo. Earth to Marco.” Star laughs.

Marco blinks and his creased expression smoothes out. He even smiles. “Yeah, it’s super sweet.”

Star giggles. “Right?” She lays a peck on Tom’s cheek.

Marco nods and with that continues past her room. While he is proud of how sincere he sounded, he can’t ignore the truth. That feeling has returned – full force. It gnaws at him and eats away at any joy he might have derived from Star and Tom being so happy. Why? Why won’t it go away? He groans and throws his head into his hands.

Maybe he is jealous. Just like they said from the start. But…is that right? He doesn’t think so. He loves Jackie, really and truly. And that feeling is just as powerful as the deep seeded wrongness lying within Star’s eyes and actions. Then what…? He can only pray he doesn’t find the answer, that this fragile piece of happiness everyone has right now doesn’t shatter.

…

“Ok.” Marco stands before their team. “It looks like we’re gonna have to split up for this mission guys.”

“Oh, Tom! Tom!” Star zips over to Tom’s side and seizes his arm. “I called him.” She rests her head on his arm and grins up at him.

Ponyhead shoots her a look. “Girl, this is like the millionth time. You don’t have to call it anymore.”

Kelly places her hands on her hips. “Seriously.”

“Pssh.” Star releases Tom long enough to wave a hand dismissively. “You never know guys. Janna likes to steal him sometimes. Right, Marco?” She leans into Tom more as she looks to Marco.

“Eh.” Janna shrugs. “I’m over it.” She has stolen enough of his books so she doesn’t have to ask him about any of his supernatural junk.

Marco narrows his eyes at Star and makes a sound beneath his breath. They’re right. She jumps on Tom at every possible moment. Not to mention it is becoming more and more over the top. What started as innocent pictures to remember a double date has escalated to something Marco finds increasingly hard to ignore.

“Marcoooo?” Star calls to him

Marco nods. “Yeah, right,” he realizes his voice is a bit tight, but there is nothing he can do about it. Nothing he wants to do about it. His suspicions have turned to ever rising agitation and he really just needs her to tone it down. Otherwise…he has a bad feeling. About her, Tom, and perhaps most of all himself.

…

It is late at night and Marco knows better than to venture out of his room, but he does it anyway. He does it knowing what will happen, maybe he even does it because of what will happen. He can’t be sure anymore. Either way he ends up walking to the kitchen, hungry for nachos, and on the way he must pass through the living room.

He steps carefully along the floor, tries his best to avoid all the boards that creak, but to no avail. He hits a particularly loud spot and goes stiff.

Star shoves herself up from her spot laying against Tom’s chest. “Marco?” She grins as her head appears over the top of the couch.

Marco breathes deeply out. He turns to her. “Yes?” He puts on a smile.

“Why don’t you join us?” She nods over and over, as if trying to silently prompt him to agree. “We’re watching a Love Sentence movie. Your favorite.”

Marco grinds his teeth. Yeah. His favorite. And one of her least favorites. She may be into Love Sentence, but when they watched the movie she complained about it for weeks. There is no reason for her to pick that besides to try and lure him near. He could choose to believe she did it for Tom, but he is done convincing himself of the pureness in her motives. It isn’t for Tom. It never has been. And he’s done with it. “Nah, I think I’m good. Kinda tired.” He shrugs.

Tom sits up and comes into view a moment later. “You sure dude? It would be really fun to see it with you again.” He smiles.

Marco stares longingly. Truth be told he would love to watch it with Tom – a true fan. It was their thing first. Not to mention he just misses doing things with Tom period. Ever since he and Star started dating again they haven't been able to meet up and play games or do…anything. But he refuses to play into Star's whims like some kind of puppet, no matter how much he'd love to chill with Tom. "I really am tired," Marco says weakly. Her expression sags, worn and helpless.

Tom’s brow creases and his smile falls. “Yeah, that’s cool.” He drops his eyes.

“Your loss!” Star pipes before diving at Tom and taking him down on the couch. She presses her lips to his, a strong deep kiss.

Marco clenches his fists and gnashes his teeth. But he says nothing. He turns hard on his heel and marches up the stairs, his hunger replaced with a roiling fire. That’s it. No more. He saw her eyes flicker to him as she kissed Tom and he. Has. Had. Enough. He refuses to let this drag on any longer. It may ruin what little he has left in his relationship to Star, but he barely cares anymore. What she is doing is wrong. She is wrong – the wrongness he has felt from the very beginning. And now he’s going to end it.

…

It’s harder than Marco thought it would be, but eventually he catches Star in a moment where she isn’t with Tom and they aren’t on a mission. He finds her in her room and he doesn’t give a courtesy knock or even pause so that she sees him, he just walks right in.

Star lays stretched out on her bed with her head in her hands. At the sound of the floor creaking she pops her head up to see who it is. “Oh! Marco.” She swings her legs around and bounces into a sitting position. “What’s up? Wanna hang?” She laughs.

“Star. You need to stop.” He crosses his arms. “Now.”

Star blinks up at him. “Stop what?” She frowns. “Trying to hang out with you?”

“Oh, stop it.” Marco stares stone cold at her. “You may be naïve, but you’re not stupid. And I’m not stupid either. I can see what you are doing with Tom.”

“Um, dating?” her tone is flat as she raises a brow and looks at him as if he is in fact stupid.

“Using him,” Marco snaps.

Star’s mouth gapes. “I’m sorry, what?” She half laughs, an edge curling around the sound.

“You heard me. I just can’t believe it took me this long to figure it out.” He sneers at himself. “I knew, I knew from the start that it all happened way too suddenly. There was no way you could have fallen for him all over again in the span of a night.” He starts to pace in a short line and throws his hands in the air. “But no, I couldn’t stick to my guns. I had to let your cliché ‘love does crazy things’ get to me. And every time after that – the picture, the clinging, the…everything. I let myself believe in your goodness, no, forced myself to.” He stops hard in front of her. “I wanted to believe the Star I knew wouldn’t do this. So I made it so. And that makes me just as wrong as you.” He shakes his head. “But don’t think it absolves you.”

Star’s eyes catch fire. “Ex-cuse you.” She shoves herself to her feet. “I’m sorry if hugging, kissing, and wanting to be around someone all the time offends you somehow, but that’s what dating is Marco. It’s exactly like you and Jackie.” She smirks.

Marco’s lips curl in disgust. “Jackie and I are nothing like you and Tom. I don’t parade her around like some prize and shove her down your throat to try and make you jealous. I treat her like a person – a person I genuinely care for. You…” He sneers. “You don’t even treat Tom like a human being. All he is to you is an object – a convenient tool to try and get my eyes on you. You kiss and cling and wave every little thing you two do around in my face, hoping that I’ll bite and suddenly want you as badly as you want me.”

“What’s the matter, Marco?” She leans forward, her eyes glinting with something between mischief and malice. “Jealous?”

Marco scoffs and takes a step back. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” He levels her with an intense look. “But I’m gonna tell you what I told Tom before – you can’t make someone love you. They have to want to.”

Star makes a soft sound of acknowledgement.

“So stop it. Stop using him. Stop toying with his emotions. And stop chasing me. Because you’re not making me jealous.”

“I can’t stop something I’m not doing.”

Marco shakes his head. “Keep telling yourself that. It won’t make it any more true.”

Star scoffs. “Same to you. Because just like you’ve seen me, I’ve seen you over these past months. There’s something rising within you. It started out as a simmer, but now it’s finally boiling over.” She crosses her arms and watches him with self-satisfaction. “You’re jealous.” She turns and walks toward the exit, pausing to shoot him a look over her shoulder and say, “I see it in your eyes.” With that she leaves the room.

Marco stands there for a long time. He doesn’t move and honestly he isn’t sure he even breathes. Thoughts fly through his head at a million miles an hour, tumbling over and crashing into each other in the frenzy. Him…jealous? No way. He has felt nothing but contempt toward Star over her actions and even in the beginning while he was giving her the benefit of the doubt he wasn’t jealous that Tom was the recipient of her affections. That wasn’t why the situation felt wrong. And he certainly knows his own feelings, and far better than her. Still…her words eat away at him, replacing the burden of the wrongness with something much more frightening. Jealousy...there’s just no way. He shakes his head and promptly leaves the room. Too bad those feelings can’t be abandoned just as easily.

…

Nothing changes. Because of course it doesn’t. Star is dead set on her objective, no matter how futile. Marco draws in a deep breath. Which means he’ll have to talk to Tom about it. It’s not that he is afraid of Tom or what he might do – he has gotten so much better about his emotions triggering his powers and they are too close for Tom to ever want to do him harm – it’s more about what this will do to their friendship. One wrong word is all it will take to set Tom on the defensive and cause their well-built foundation to crumble.

He tightens his hold on the dimensional scissors. He’ll just have to be extra careful. He opens a portal and steps through into Tom’s bedroom.

Tom starts and blinks up at him from where he lays on his bed. “Oh. Marco. What are you doing here?” They didn’t have any plans, did they?

Marco frowns and his eyes dim. It hurts to see Tom so surprised by his appearance. Used to he was over so frequently Tom wouldn’t even bat an eye when a portal popped up and he stepped out. How could it really come to this? Star or not, Marco should never have let it reach this point. “I…I need to talk to you.” He moves his foot in small circles.

Tom frowns. “Okay…”

“It’s about Star.” Marco looks anywhere but at Tom.

Tom stiffens and his grip on his controller tightens. “What about Star?”

Marco makes his way over to Tom’s bed and sits at the edge. He wants to find comfort in this familiar position, but what he gets is the exact opposite. He feels so much like Star. She sat just like this when he faced her. He sorely hopes this doesn’t turn out like that. “I don’t know if, I mean…I’ve been getting this feeling of-” He sighs. “Are you happy?” He can’t believe himself as he falls back on that question.

Tom sets the controller down and stands, walking toward Marco.

Marco swallows hard and ducks his head. Please don’t stop in front of him. Please don’t stop in front of him. Please.

Tom doesn’t hesitate, he takes a seat by Marco’s side. For some reason his friend is already squirming and he knows that feeling all too well. Facing him will only make him more nervous.

Marco lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

“What’s wrong with you, dude?” Tom raises a brow as he watches Marco’s profile.

Marco blinks twice. “H-Hey! I asked a question first.” He tries to puff himself up to look indignant, but he knows by Tom’s expression that he fails miserably.

“You look like you’ll freak out if I so much as touch you.” Tom pokes Marco’s arm.

Marco smacks at Tom’s finger. “Stop it,” he fusses. “I’m fine.”

“Yeah, ok.” Tom shakes his head. “And yeah, I’m happy with Star. Just like I said the last time. Why?” His brows knit together and he studies Marco intently.

“Sorry, but I…I don’t think she really loves you.”

Tom’s face goes blank. “What?”

Marco tugs at the sleeve of his hoodie. “I don’t mean to hurt you, really, but Star just has not been acting right from the very beginning. You have to have seen it too – how she flaunts you in front of me.”

Tom’s face loses all its creases and he clenches his fists. “Seriously?” he says flatly. There is no warmth in his eyes.

Marco straightens and looks dead into Tom’s eyes. “Tom, come on, don’t take it like that. I’m saying this because I care. I don’t want to see you get hurt because of how selfish she is being.”

“Selfish? Her?” He grinds his teeth.

Marco watches him carefully.

“You told me months ago that you weren’t jealous. And I believed you. But you…” He shakes his head. “You have the nerve to call her selfish?”

Marco gapes. “What?” His eyes bulge. “Are you kidding me? I told you. I. Am. Not. Jealous!” he all but shrieks it. His chest heaves. “I…I just want you to be with someone who really cares about you,” his voice gradually softens, “and I know it hurts, but she…doesn’t.”

Tom scoffs. “You don’t know anything about us.”

Marco makes a face. “I know everything. She lives with me for crying out loud – has lived with me for nearly a year. The same goes for you too. You’re one of my closest friends.” He lays a hand on his chest. “Please, don’t do this to yourself.”

Tom pins him beneath his blazing gaze. “I guess we’re not as close as you thought.”

Marco starts and his expression wilts, the words cutting so deep it’s almost physical.

Tom doesn’t react to Marco’s shift. “You had your chance.” He stands. “You can’t change your mind just because she wants me now. That’s not how it works.”

Marco swallows hard and musters up his sternest look as he stands to match Tom. “I don’t love Star,” he barely keeps his voice from wavering. “And you shouldn’t either.”

Tom gapes for a split second before his lips curl into a snarl. “A real friend would never say that to me.” Tom’s eyes flicker red.

Marco is crushed as Tom rubs salt in the wound. He takes a step back, slowly drawing the scissors from his pocket. “Tom…” He wants to say something – something that will take this disaster and turn it to his advantage or even just something to salvage what remains of their friendship. But he finds nothing. And he knows when Tom has reached his limit. He cuts a rift next to him, his eyes never leaving Tom. Only as he steps through and Tom disappears from his view does he let his gaze fall. Even then the image of Tom’s expression still burns into his brain. He sighs and hangs his head. Things will definitely change now, but not for the better. Now he’s lost both Star and Tom.

…

“I…messed up,” Marco lets his face fall into his hands. He hides his shame from the world and Jackie in particular as they sit on a bench in the park.

“You mean with Star?” Jackie tilts her head.

Marco mumbles into his hands, “Uh-huh.” Really that isn’t even the half of it though. He messed up with everyone involved. Well, at least he has Jackie.

“Wanna talk about it?” Jackie lays a hand on Marco’s shoulder.

Marco is quiet for a long moment, probably too long, but she doesn’t urge him on and eventually he sighs. He raises his head from his hands and looks to her. “Well-no, first…can I ask you something?”

“Sure.” Jackie smiles.

“Do you think Star has been acting, I don’t know, weird? Like…more weird than normal?”

Jackie taps a finger against her chin and lifts her gaze to the sky. She hums as she contemplates. “Maybe. I mean, she’s always kind of weird.” She half laughs, but when she drops her gaze to meet Marco’s she becomes completely serious. “But I guess you mean with Tom. So, yeah, she has been a bit…much?” She shrugs. “I don’t know what to call it.”

“Really?” Marco holds his breath and brightens ever so slightly. “Or…are you just saying that to make me feel better about the mess I made?” She is really sweet so she would do that for him, wanting nothing more than for him to feel better. Still, he wants the truth.

Jackie frowns and shakes her head. “Nah, dude. I mean it. I’ve felt weird about it for a while whenever we do the whole double date stuff, but it didn’t seem important enough to say anything. Everyone looked happy, so…” She shrugs. “Eh. You know?”

Marco ekes out a laugh. “Yeah…eh.”

“So,” she stretches out the word, “I guess you did say something then, huh?” She smiles knowingly.

Marco deflates. “Yeah…”

“So what happened?”

“Well…” Marco rubs the back of his neck and averts his eyes. “I thought I knew what it was, that weird feeling, and I thought it was that Star was trying to make me jealous by pushing her relationship with Tom.” He grimaces. “But…they both called me jealous. So…”

Jackie blinks. “Both?”

“Oh. Right. Um, after talking to Star I tried talking to Tom too.” He sighs. “Even dumber. I…I don’t even know if we’re friends anymore.” The light is extinguished from his eyes.

Jackie frowns as she contemplates him. “Marco, you and Tom are friends, pretty close by the way you talk about him all the time.”

Marco’s cheeks color. “I-I do not talk about him all the time!”

Jackie snickers. “Yeah, ok.” She quiets her expression. “But good friends don’t just stop being friends, not over something like this. He just needs time to think.” She shrugs. “Same as me after Star said she had a crush on you.”

“Oh…” Marco says softly. So that’s what she was doing while he was on Mewni.

Jackie chuckles and tucks her hair behind an ear. “Yep, I did that. But seriously, don’t get so down.” She gives him a peck on the cheek and smiles. “He’ll come around. Trust me.”

Marco smiles back. “I trust you.”

…

Marco isn’t sure how much time passes. He stops counting the days after a while. All he knows is that Tom and Star still haven’t talked to him since he confronted them. And with each and every day that passes the weight he feels increases. You sure Starred this whole thing up. Star’s words play in his head. Wow. That was so long ago. She didn’t have feelings for him, he wasn’t with Jackie, and he…hadn’t even met Tom. How is it that it came to this from such an innocent place?

Marco doesn’t notice the presence, not until a board squeaks from across the room. He snaps to attention and jerks his hands into a defensive pose, eyes wild and heart racing. He doesn’t know what he expects, but when he focuses he is stunned to see Tom standing before him. He stares blankly.

Tom doesn’t even flinch. He simply stands there and stares right back at Marco, the only difference is in his eyes there is a deep sadness. It’s etched in every crease on his face.

Marco grapples for the words to say. This is it. This is the moment he has been waiting for all this time. There is so much he could say, he just needs the right words. What comes out is, “You…did you…walk in?” He mentally face palms.

Tom blinks. “Oh, um, yeah…” He rubs the back of his neck. “I guess I did.”

Marco chews on the inside of his cheek. He fidgets in the silence as it wraps itself around them in a death grip. It becomes so unbearable he can feel his skin crawling. He has to break it. He opens his mouth, “I-”

“I’m sorry,” Tom blurts out.

Marco comes to attention. “Huh?”

“I’m sorry. You know…for what I said. That you weren’t a real friend.” He drops his gaze to the floor. “It was cruel.” He chuckles, but it is a bitter sound. “I should know that more than anyone. But I did it anyway.”

Marco swallows. “It’s alright.” He stands and walks closer. “I’m sorry too. And maybe…” He shrugs. “Maybe I was a little jealous. I mean, I wasn’t getting to spend much time with either of you anymore.”

“No, you were right.” He sighs. “I felt it too. The same as you said. I just,” he clenches his fists. “I didn’t want to believe it.” He shakes his head. “I wanted it so badly. Wanted to be happy, and with her. For as long as possible. I willed myself not to see the lies.”

Marco frowns. “You can still be happy. You don’t need her for that.” He looks hard at Tom. “You know that, right?”

Tom nods stiffly. “Yeah…but that doesn’t make it hurt any less. Not right now.” He bites his lip.

“It’ll get better.” He lays a hand on Tom’s shoulder. “It just takes time.” Like everything else. “Oh!” Marco glimpses his game console from the corner of his eyes. “So hey, how bout we play a round?” He motions toward the system. “Huh? Maybe I’ll win for real this time.” He grins.

Tom is thrown by Marco’s sudden shift, but most of all by how genuine his smile is and how bright his eyes are as they focus on him.  “Marco?”

“Hm?” He dials back his excitement, but he keeps a smile on his face.

“You…” He tugs at his sleeve. “You really forgive me? That easily?” He knows Marco isn’t one to hold grudges. He’s seen it time and time again. Still, something of this magnitude, he can’t quite believe it.

Marco frowns. “Of course. Why wouldn’t I?”

“But…aren’t you angry? I…I was so…” His face creases and his lips curl in disgust as he stares down at his own hands.

Marco smiles tenderly. “Tom.” He steps forward and engulfs Tom in a hug. “I was never mad at you, just hurt. Hurt and afraid you’d never talk to me again.”

Tom’s eyes widen and he stiffens. For a moment he swears he stops breathing and that maybe even time itself stops.

“Even if I was mad…you’re my friend. I care about you. So as long as you mean it, I’ll always forgive you.”

Emotion wells up in Tom and tears roll down his cheeks. He buries his face in Marco’s shoulder and wraps his arms around him, digging his fingers into the space between Marco’s shoulder blades as he holds on tight. “Everyone else would leave me,” he whispers.

“Haven’t you heard? I’m not like most people.” He pulls away and smirks. “At least that’s what someone told me.”

Tom puffs out a laugh and a smile lights his face. “Yeah, you’re not.” He wipes away the tears. “Which means I don’t have to feel sorry when I win a hundred times.” He runs past Marco and to the game.

Marco shakes his head and rolls his eyes, but the smile doesn’t fade. “I’ll win! You’ll see.” And as he sits next to Tom, for the first time in months there is no terrible feeling deep within him. There is only happiness.

No, a million times no I do not want this to actually happen in the show because if Star used Tom like this and was that jealous I would genuinely hate her character. I just really wanted to play with the idea and so I did. Also I already know that the dance won't play out like this in canon, it just served as a good jumping off point and I seized the opportunity.

I may or may not continue this, not sure. Either way I hope it still stands as a good complete piece even without another part and that you loved it as much as I loved writing it.

[cynicallystiles]

Full Stop

Disclaimer: Gif originally posted by me.

Author: @cynicallystiles

Request: @itrocksmysocks - Song-based fic from the song “Punto y Aparte” by Morat.

Warning: Fluff, angst, slight mention of sex, and a breakup.

Notes: Soooo sorry this took so long. I’ve been trying to write when I have motivation so it didn’t turn out like shit. But, obviously, I’m not very motivated often. There will be a part two as requested, hopefully in a few days! Please COMMENT/REBLOG if you enjoy!

Pairing: Shawn Mendes x Reader

Masterlist in Bio

Words: 7,510

"Eyes, look your last! Arms, take your last embrace!" You hear Shawn speak his lines perfectly, if not a little bit over-dramatically. His voice comes from somewhere to your right, though you couldn't be sure because you had to keep your eyes closed and your arms crossed over your chest as if you were dead.

The air around you seems to change as he pauses for dramatic effect before his next line. "And lips, O you kiss the doors of breath..." his voice was right next to you now and honestly you were a little bit nervous. To have your first kiss not only be in front of a ton of people but to not even be able to react when the boy kisses you? Oh, it was a cruel joke.

"Seal with a righteous kiss..." You could feel his lips hovering just above yours hesitantly. "Y/n?"

You peek one eye open to see his face mere inches from yours. "Yes?" You whisper urgently because he's taking way too long.

"Sorry," he whispers back. "I just wanted you to see me when I kiss you." You barely have time to react as he leans down and places a sweet peck to your lips. You scrunch your eyes closed, trying to ignore your heart furiously beating in your chest.

He continues on with his lines, drinking the poison and 'dying.' You rise to a sitting position and continue through the play. Eventually, you find Shawn on the ground with a goblet in his hands. You say your lines as anxiety-free as possible, but that was a hard task considering now you had to kiss him while his eyes were closed.

"I will kiss thy lips," you project as you sit on your knees, cradling Shawn's limp body in your lap. "Haply some poison yet doth hang on them..." you caress his cheek, and you think you see him inhale sharply. "To make for with a restorative."

You lean your head down and your lips brush against his gently before you press them together firmly. After about a second, you pull back and lick your lips. "Thy lips are warm," you deliver your line as sadly as possible.

But when you look down, you see the slight smirk on Shawn's face and you barely manage to hide the grin that pulls at your lips. You continue the scene, 'stabbing' yourself and falling 'dead' on top of Shawn dramatically. Shawn almost burst out laughing at how heavily you fell onto him, and you wanted to laugh at him laughing.

The play ends and the two of you stand in the middle of the cast holding hands as you bow. The crowd cheers rather loudly and Shawn shoves you out in front of him to bow on your own. You do so and the crowd cheers louder, so you grip Shawn by his hand and pull him in front of you to bow by himself as you clap.

He turns to look at you over his shoulder with a broad grin and reaches his hand out to you. You blush furiously as you take it and intertwine your fingers before doing one final bow. When you both come back up, you throw your arms around his neck excitedly. Shawn doesn't react at first, too surprised by your sudden action. But he quickly recovers and wraps his arms around your waist before picking you up and spinning you around.

The two of you giggle uncontrollably as he sets you down and you run backstage to get changed out of your costumes. It was the end of the year play for the studio that the two of you took acting lessons at together. You'd been best friends since you were little, and doing these plays together gave you even more reason to always be with each other. The two of you were now 14 and in ninth grade and you were pretty certain that nothing would ever change between you two.

You finish changing and meet Shawn out in the lobby of the theater with your bag. Both of your parents agreed that you could spend the night at Shawn's after the play since the two of you were inseparable. It was becoming something of a tradition. Last year, he played Prince Charming while you were Cinderella. The two of you agreed that you'd just fake the onstage kiss for that one. But for Romeo and Juliet, it was important that it look as real as possible.

The two of you hopped in the back of Shawn's parents' car and they drove to his house. All the while, the two of you were in the back being uncharacteristically quiet. Street lamps that passed by shone snippets of light on Shawn's face as he looked out the window. When he turns and sees you looking at him, his cheeks tint pink and he grins broadly at you.

You return the grin at his goofy, yet cute smile. Even before he got his braces off, his smile was one of your favorite things about him. As soon as the car was in the driveway, you hopped out and raced inside up to Shawn's room. He passes the doorway to go to the bathroom to change into his pajamas and you changed in his room.

Just as you've pulled the T-shirt over your head, there's a timid knock on the door. You run over and fling it open so Shawn can enter as you flop your back onto his bed. He laughs while he goes to his desk chair, picking up his black guitar along the way. You flip over onto your stomach and rummage through your backpack as he strums the strings.

You finally fish out your book and roll back over onto your back as you hold it in the air above you to read. "Hey, y/n?" Shawn catches your attention and you tilt your head back to look at him upside down.

"Yeah?" Your eyes glance back at the book you were still holding in the air as you waited for his response.

His legs swivel the chair while he plucks a few experimental strings. "What song should I cover for my next video?" He let his eyes finally wander from the strings over to you on the bed. "Are you reading while I'm talking to you?"

"No..." you say distractedly.

"Then what did I ask you?" He chuckles.

Your eyes skim another line of your book and your heart swells with the words on the page. "You asked if you should get a haircut," you say plainly. "You definitely should."

"Y/n!" He whines playfully.

A giggle falls from your lips as you close the book and turn over to face him properly. "I'm just kidding! Geez." You sit upright, letting your legs dangle off of the bed. "You asked what song you should cover for your next video, duh."

"And your answer?" He prompts you as he sets his guitar back in its stand.

You shrug, picking up your book and opening it in your lap. "You should cover whatever you wanna cover, Shawn. Why am I always picking out your songs?" As your eyes go back to reading, Shawn stands up and snatches the book from your lap. "Hey-"

"You're always picking them out because you're my best friend and I like what you pick." He closes the book dramatically and looks at the cover. "What is this, anyway?"

Getting to your feet, you cross the small distance to Shawn. "It's a book of poetry if you must know," you reply as you reach out to take it back. He quickly moves it out of your reach above his head.

"You're such a sap," he laughs. "Why don't you just read romance novels like everyone else?" He stretches his arm higher as you jump to try and reach the book.

You let out a huff as you cross your arms momentarily. "Not all poetry is about love, genius." You hop again and barely manage to grip the corner of the book.

"Oh, yeah? Then, what is poetry about?" He challenges.

Your hand pulls on the book, and Shawn pulls back harder causing you to stumble forward. His other hand steadies you by your waist and he looks down at you intently as he waits. "It's about life."

"Life, huh?" He breathes out. You're chest to chest and you begin to breathe shallowly.

You nod, swallowing to ease the sudden dryness in your throat. "It's about life and the things that happen to you in it..." you murmur. He tilts his head as if to ask you to go on, so you do. You roll your eyes to cover the heat flushing your cheeks. "There are some poems about love...but also about loss and how to keep going when it's hard."

He slowly lowers his hand and the two of you clutch the book in between you. "Why would you wanna read sad poetry?"

"I don't know..." You shrug. "Because when they put it out there for everyone to read...it's not sad anymore, it's just beautiful."

You look down and scrunch your lips to one side nervously before rolling them together. When you look back up, Shawn has a look that you don't recognize on his features. He opens his mouth to speak when you hear his mom's voice from downstairs. "Midnight is in five minutes!! Come downstairs to watch the fireworks!"

He jumps and you pull the book from him while tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. You clear your throat as you toss it on the bed. "Don't wanna miss the fireworks." You walk around Shawn and out of the tense atmosphere of his room. He slowly follows you downstairs, a few steps behind.

"Aww," his mom coos. "You two look adorable in your matching pajamas! I'm so glad you made those last year! Here...stand together so I can get a picture."

She motions for you to scoot closer. Shawn stands next to you and wraps his arm around your shoulders. You wrap yours around his waist while putting your other hand up in a 'peace' sign. He slightly leans into you and does the same with his other hand.

"Oh, come on. Smile, you two. You look like someone died," his dad chips in.

Fighting the fluttering feeling in your chest, you pull your features into a broad smile. You glance at Shawn as he does the same, his smile always looking better than yours no matter the circumstances. You feel his hand squeeze your shoulder and all the weirdness from before fades away.

The camera clicks and the flash goes off, momentarily blinding the both of you. When you take a look at it, you're not completely appalled by it. Shawn looks as cute as he always does in his dark blue, plaid pajama pants. Your T-shirts are white with both of your names written on the front in colorful lettering.

After grabbing some soda, the two of you head out onto the porch to watch the sky for the fireworks happening soon. You both rest your arms on the railing as you clutch your cups. It's pretty cold, and neither of you wore jackets out because it was only supposed to be a few minutes.

"Hey, Shawn," you break the silence with an unsure tone.

He takes a sip of his soda before answering, "Yeah?"

"Why...why did you have me open my eyes for the kiss in the play?" The question had been picking at the back of your mind since it happened and you figured you'd just ask.

He straightens up a little bit and turns his head to look at you. "Because it was your first kiss and I know that you would've wanted to at least be able to see who was kissing you first."

"How do you know that?" You narrow your eyes at him skeptically.

Shawn shrugs and a tiny grin appears on his lips as he looks into your eyes. "Because I know you."

You blink a couple times, unsure of how to respond to that. "Well, thanks. I mean, that doesn't count as my first kiss anyway...but thanks for the thought." You decide to play it cool. You kind of did count it, only because it was Shawn. But, you didn't want to let him know that.

"O-oh, it doesn't?" Shawn clears his throat as he straightens his back a little bit more.

Your brows quirk together quickly and you straighten up to face him. "Not really," you chuckle nervously. He looks down at his slipper-clad feet before setting his cup on the rail. "I mean, I just figured you didn't count it either since it was acting. You're gonna be kissing all kinds of girls when you're in movies someday."

"Yeah...yeah, I guess you're right," he says softly as he toes a chunk of snow off the porch. "I never really thought about it that way." He grows quiet and you can see the deep pink taking over his cheeks.

"Shawn," you say, a sudden and crazy idea popping into your head. He looks up from the ground at you shyly. "Can I ask you a favor?"

A soft smile returns to his lips. "Yeah. You can ask me anything," he replies honestly.

"Will you kiss me at midnight?" You blurt out quickly for fear that you'd get too scared to ask.

His eyebrows practically shoot up to his hairline. "Will I what??" He laughs incredulously.

"You heard what I said." You frown at his reaction because it wasn't at all what you were expecting. He continues chuckling and you just cross your arms and turn back to the rail murmuring, "It wasn't that funny."

He immediately stops laughing, seeing that he's hurt your feelings. "Oh, come on y/n. I didn't mean it like that, it's just..." You fix your eyes on the cup in your hands and he gently lays his hand on your forearm. "Hey, look at me."

"Why?" You deadpan. "So you can laugh in my face again?" Inside you hear the countdown starting at a minute. 59, 58, 57...

His hand pulls more firmly and you let your body face him. "I promise, I was not laughing at what you asked." He holds his pinky up silently waiting for you to believe him. You heave a sigh as you take his pinky with yours.

"Then, what were you laughing at?"

"You just...caught me off-guard," he slightly chuckles again. You squeeze your pinky around his and he continues. "Why do you want me to kiss you at midnight?" 36, 35, 34...

You shrug, still not meeting his eyes. "I thought you sounded disappointed that I didn't count our stage one." You summon all your courage to look at him. "I thought maybe...you wanted me to count you as my first." 13, 12, 11...

He doesn't respond right away and you assume that means you were wrong about his tone earlier. 5, 4, 3... "I do." Your eyes widen and before you know what's happening, Shawn is leaning down to bring his lips to yours.

Your eyes close instinctively, this time knowing he's about to kiss you. You feel his lips ghost over yours shyly and you tilt your head upward toward him. His breath fans your lips just before you feel them press against yours. You inhale slowly as your heart pounds in your chest.

You vaguely hear the fireworks go off above you, but it's hard to say for sure with how loud the blood is rushing in your ears. His lips are soft and delicate while he keeps them pursed against yours for a few more moments. You find yourself leaning further into him just as he pulls away, a nervous smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

When your eyes flutter open, you see a kind of shyness you've never seen in him before. "Uh...um," he stutters before swallowing quickly. "Happy New Year."

"Happy New Year, Shawn," you giggle. "Thanks...for, uh, you know...being my first kiss." You clear your throat as if it would make your heart stop pounding in it.

One corner of his mouth pulls up. "You're welcome." After a moment, he quickly adds, "And thank you, too! Because...you know, being my first kiss and all." He shrugs awkwardly and you laugh.

"You...are welcome," you reply softly. You blink slowly before tipping your head slightly to the side. "About the song you should cover..."

He looks lost for a second before he shakes his head while remembering. "Oh. Never mind about that. I've got one in mind now." His eyes gaze into yours and your eyebrows furrow together intrigued.

"Are you gonna tell me?" You question. He shrugs with a mischievous glint in his eye as you realize that you're still holding pinkies. You release yours and let your hand go to the pocket of your matching pajama pants. "We should get inside...it's really cold."

Shawn's eyes widen when he sees you slightly shivering. "Right!" He grabs your cups and ushers you inside where he wraps a thick blanket around you. "You should come over when I record the next song. That way you can give me your opinion..."

"Sure, sounds fun," you answer automatically, thinking nothing of it as you watch his parents dance to a song that's come on the radio. Beside you, Shawn watches your face and how your eyes follow the movements of his parents wondrously. Your eyes almost close completely when you grin broadly at how goofy they were acting and Shawn gets lost in the sound of your laugh that follows.

A couple of weeks later, you head over to Shawn's house after school just like you said you would. The door is unlocked when you get there and you call out into the house, "Hello? Shawn! I'm here!!" You close it and head upstairs to his room.

The door is cracked and you hear a racket coming from inside. You carefully push the door open and stand there as you take in the scene. Shawn is frantically running around his room picking up dirty clothes and throwing them in his hamper, straightening random things along the way. You clear your throat loudly.

"Ah!" Shawn spins around, almost falling over his book bag. You stifle a laugh as you watch him regain his balance. "Y/n! When did you get here?" He finishes putting the dirty clothes away and sits in his desk chair quickly.

You enter and sit on the edge of his bed. "Just now..." your eyebrows scrunch together at his weird behavior and you scoff. "What is up with you? You never clean your room," you point out.

"That," he says as he claps his hands together, "is not important right now." He stands up from the chair and pulls you off the bed by your hands. "What is important is that I play the song with you before I record it so you just sit here..." He gently pushes you into the desk chair and swivels you by your knees to face the stool he plays on.

Shawn sits on the stool facing you as he adjusts the beanie on his head. "Shawn. Seriously, why are you acting like you took Adderall?" You chuckle as you relax back in the chair.

He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. "Sorry...I'm just really nervous about what I'm about to do. So, just," he sighs as he rubs his palms up and down his thighs anxiously, "Don't laugh at me, okay?"

"Promise," you respond immediately serious at his tone and mannerisms. You sit up and nod at him to play for you while you listen. He smiles timidly and picks up his guitar, resting it on his lap while he takes a couple of deep breaths.

Slowly, he begins playing the strings to a familiar song that you hear on the radio all the time. It's one of your favorites, actually. Wanted by Hunter Hayes. You smile softly as Shawn continues to sing. After the first couple of lines, he gains the confidence to look up from the guitar to you as he sings.

You bop your foot along and quietly hum the lyrics. By the second chorus, you're singing along fully with him. Shawn smiles as he sings to you, not expecting you to sing back to him. Truthfully, you were a pretty good singer because of being in choir since you were little. But, that wasn't really what you wanted to do with your life. The two of your voices mix together in perfect harmony as Shawn strums the last of the notes.

Grinning broadly, you clap. "That was so good, Shawn!! You should definitely record it and put it up on YouTube," you encourage him. He blushes slightly as he sets the guitar back in its stand and his hands go back to resting on his knees.

"Thanks," he chuckles as he catches his breath. "You were great, too! I didn't expect you to sing along."

He smiles at you incredulously as you shrug. "Ah, I couldn't help it! You sounded so good and I love the song..." you trail off as you look at him and see his smile has faded. "I'm sorry, did I ruin it?" You giggle.

"What? No!" He quickly disagrees.

"Then, why do you look like I just ruined it?"

He shakes his head and stands up. "You didn't ruin it. I'm just...preparing myself for what comes after the song," he admits.

"Oh, and what comes after?" You ask curiously. Shawn's mouth opens to speak but he closes it again. "You're worrying me. Did you take something?" You tease.

He narrows his eyes at you menacingly but his lips quirk into a reluctant grin. "I'm not on anything. But, I think may be in something."

"...like your room? Or this house?" You ask with a chuckle.

Shawn walks over to you without warning and pulls you up to stand by your hands. You can see by the movements of his chest that he's breathing very deeply as he looks into your eyes. He inhales one more time before closing his eyes and leaning forward to bring his lips to yours.

Your eyes close and you feel his soft lips press into yours, just like they did on New Year's Eve. He carefully brings his hands to hold you by your waist and you rest yours on his chest. You tilt your head and your lips move against his at a different angle. His fingertips sink into your waist slightly before he presses his lips into yours a little more firmly before breaking away from you.

You breathe out slowly, unsure of what just happened. Your eyebrows are raised and you keep your eyes closed while you wait for the dizzy feeling to go away. "Well, you didn't pull away..." Shawn breathes out and his words fan your lips.

"Why did you do that?" You whisper with your eyes still closed.

He clears his throat. "Because I like you. Like, I like like you. I'm in like with you," he rambles on and you chuckle. "And...I think you're in like with me too."

You just barely manage to gain control of your body and force your head to tilt up and down once. The movement is almost imperceptible to Shawn, so you speak as well. "You...would be right. Yeah."

"Awesome," he breathes out and you can hear the smile in his tone. You let your eyes flutter open and find his hazel brown eyes gazing right into yours. "Y/n...will you be my girlfriend?" He whispers, the shyness returning.

A smile takes over your lips as you nod fully this time. "Yeah. Yeah, I will." He lets out a relieved chuckle as he snakes his arms around your waist and you let yours slide around the back of his neck.

Things after that afternoon changed. You were no longer allowed to spend the night at each other's houses (understandably). The two of you were always holding hands in between classes and stealing kisses at hockey games. Shawn took you to a movie for your 15th birthday and you didn't really watch much of it. You thought that things were gonna be perfect like this forever.

But, they weren't. You saw a little bit less of Shawn when he went on tour with Magcon with other Viners after he gained a whole lot of followers very quickly and was an opening act for Austin Mahone on his tour. Then, some manager discovered him and flew him to a real-life record label. Everything was happening so fast, you don't even remember Shawn saying that he wanted to switch his dream from being an actor to a singer.

You had things going on for yourself though. By your 16th birthday, you had won a couple of poetry contests and one of your poems was even published in a literary magazine. Although, your big news was kind of overshadowed by Shawn's new that he was officially a signed singer. You saw even less of him as he worked to release his EP in the summer.

While you were really proud of him, you had to admit that you were feeling kind of lonely. Yes, he was your first real boyfriend, but no amount of American movies and TV shows could've prepared you for what to do when your boyfriend slowly becomes a pop star. You were just hoping that things with Shawn would be normal enough for the two of you to get through 11th grade together.

And they were. Slightly. He still came to school with you. But, he dropped out of all his extra-curriculars to work on his first full-length album. In August for his 16th birthday, you made him promise to take the whole day off so you could spend it together. He kept his promise and the two of you went out to eat and a movie.

Afterward, you found a nice secluded place where you could park your car and lay on the hood to look at the stars. Shawn lays with his back on the windshield, one arm resting behind his head as he curls the other around you.

"This is so nice," you say nuzzling closer into his chest.

He kisses the top of your head and pulls you into him as well. "I know. I feel like we haven't had a chance to be alone in a while," he chuckles. You don't answer, just quietly savoring this moment with him. "I know that's mostly my fault. I'm sorry I've been so busy-"

"Shhh," you cut him off as you sit up and look down at him. "I don't wanna talk about you being busy. Because right now..." You trail off as you slowly start to peel off your jean jacket. "You are completely and absolutely free."

Shawn leans up on his elbows. "Uh...y/n, what are you doing?" He chuckles nervously. You finish taking off your jacket and set it on the hood next to you before straddling him.

"Do you not want to?" You ask nervously as your hands rest on his chest. He shifts slightly beneath you.

"No. I mean yes! I mean-" he swallows as he takes your hands in his. "I want to. I just figured you'd want it to be more special than this," he admits.

You chuckle as you take his jaw in your hands and lean down to kiss him sweetly. "Anytime and anywhere is special," you whisper against his lips. "As long as it's with you."

His lips curl into a smile against yours as he grips your hips with both hands. He kisses you back eagerly before leaning back suddenly. "Wait, I don't have anything." He looks at you worriedly and you let your head fall forward a bit as you giggle.

"I didn't want to assume or anything, but..." you reach into your back pocket to retrieve the little square package. "I was kind of hoping."

He looks at you incredulously as he brings one hand to the back of your neck. "You're the most amazing girl I've ever met," he confesses as he pulls your lips back down to his.

That was your first time together. After that, he was so much more touchy and clingy. But, you loved every single second of it. You loved every single time you got to hang out with Shawn outside of school because those times were few and far between.

As he continued to work on his album, you took up piano lessons and learned fast. You even began dabbling in songwriting. You were pretty good at it. About a month before your 17th birthday, you had called Shawn to tell him about a songwriting competition where the winner would get a chance to help write a song for Selena Gomez's next album.

"Babe! You'll never guess what happened. I have the most exciting news!" You squealed into the phone.

He replied just as excitedly, almost as if he didn't even hear what you said. "I have big news too! Come over in an hour and I'll tell you all about it!" You opened your mouth to respond but the line had already gone dead.

An hour later, you found yourself at Shawn's house heading up to his room. You knock and he opens the door with the biggest grin on his face. He pulls you into a tight hug before ushering you inside. Just as he's about to close the door you hear his dad's voice from somewhere in the house, "NO CLOSED DOORS!"

You giggle as Shawn pulls the door back open wide. He perches on the edge of his bed and you take your place in his desk chair. "So..." you clasp your hands in your lap excitedly. "Do you want to share your news first or should I?"

"I guess I'll go first since it's kind of a lot," he proposes. "I'm still trying to wrap my mind around it all. Um," he continues before he clears his throat. "Okay. So I wanted you to be the first to know that my album is finished!"

You shoot up out of your chair at his news. "Oh my god, Shawn! That's wonderful!" You laugh excitedly as you pull him up to his feet for a hug. "I'm so proud of you," you murmur into his neck while his hand rubs up and down your back. You pull back so you can see his face. "So, I actually have some similar-"

"Wait, that's not the only news I had..." he admits.

Your eyebrows scrunch together as you sit down. "It's not?" He walks over and sits down on the stool where he used to record all his YouTube videos.

"I also have a gig lined up for the summer," he slowly confesses.

"Oh, that's great! What is it?"

He inhales deeply before releasing it. "It's being the opening act for Taylor Swift's 1989 Tour!" He grins happily. Your eyebrows raise as your mouth parts slightly, unsure of what to say.

"Wow," you breathe out. "So...you're gonna be gone all summer." Your eyes fall to your lap as an aching feeling seeps into your heart.

Shawn gets up and kneels in front of you while he takes your hands. "Hey...don't be sad. Please? Then I'm gonna be sad," he chuckles.

You nod as you look back to him. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry," he pleads. "I'll be back to finish school and graduate with you! It's just one summer. I know we can make it work." He squeezes your hands comfortingly.

"You're right...I'm really happy for you. I'm just gonna miss you is all." You smile sadly as you look at your intertwined fingers in your lap.

He thinks for a moment before standing up slowly. "Tell you what..." he goes back to his stool and picks up his guitar. "I'm gonna play you a song that's on the album that was inspired by you."

"You really wrote me a song?" You crack a tiny smile as you look at him.

He nods proudly. "A few actually, but this one is specifically to make you feel better when I'm gone." He grins at you broadly. "But, don't tell anyone. Technically, I'm not supposed to share it until the album comes out next week."

"Promise, I won't tell a soul," you giggle.

"Good," he states. "Now, scoot over here," he demands.

You laugh as you use your feet to scoot the chair all the way over to right in front of him. "Better?"

"Much!" He leans over his guitar and kisses you on the cheek before he begins strumming the guitar. You listen as he begins singing an achingly beautiful song he called Never Be Alone. By the time he finishes the song, your eyes have started watering.

"Babe, that was really beautiful." You smile sadly as you dab at your eyes to make sure no tears have dripped.

He sets the guitar back in its stand and cups your cheeks. "I'm gonna call you every chance I get, and before you know it...I'll be back for school." Shawn smiles reassuringly at you before leaning down and softly pressing his lips to yours.

Your heart is so full of your feelings for him that you forget to tell him that you won that competition. For a week in the summer, you were gonna get to stay in L.A. to write a song with Selena Gomez.

Summer came and Shawn left for Taylor's tour. About a month after, you were touching down in L.A. to work with Selena Gomez on her next single. In the month since he left, Shawn had managed to call you at least once a week. Though you thought it would be much more often.

You were in the studio one day, throwing ideas around with Selena and some other writers getting absolutely nowhere. "Guys, my brain is fried. Maybe we should order lunch and take a break," Selena suggests.

"I second that. All I had this morning was water," you chuckle tiredly.

Selena claps her hands. "Great! Let's get pizza and then we'll be back at it reenergized!" She orders enough for your small group and they get to talking while you wait.

You don't hear much of their conversation as you keep checking your phone for texts from Shawn. Selena swipes the phone from your hand. "Hey!"

"Ooo! Who's Shawn?? And why have you been opening and closing his contact for the past fifteen minutes?" She giggles mischievously.

You grab it back from her politely and put it back in your pocket. "He's my boyfriend," you admit and a blush creeps up your neck. "He's on tour and he said he would text me this morning but hasn't yet," you explain.

"On tour? Is he a musician?" Selena questions.

You smile softly, loving the chance to brag about him. "Yeah! He, um...he's actually opening for Taylor in her North America concerts."

"No way! Hold on, I'm looking him up..." she replies, already on her phone. "Damn, y/n! He's a cutie! I don't know how you keep your hands to yourself around him..."

You laugh loudly. "I literally can't!" You let your laugh die down a bit before adding on, "I mean I could, but why would I want to?"

Selena stops mid-giggle and stares at you like you've just invented electricity. "What did you just say?"

"What?"

She sits up excitedly in her chair. "What you just said! About keeping your hands to yourself! That'd be a great lyric!"

"Oh! I said..." you pause trying to remember your exact phrasing. "I think I said, 'I mean I could, but why would I want to'."

"We're onto something," Selena mumbles as you all get back to writing before the pizzas even arrive.

You successfully finish the song before heading back to Canada. The rest of the summer was kind of dull compared to hanging out with Selena Gomez but you made the best of it. Shawn wasn't able to call or text as often as he promised he would. But, that didn't really matter by the time he got back because you were excited to see him again.

While his parents went to pick him up from the airport, they said you could stay at the house with his little sister as a surprise. You had gotten some balloons and made a cake to celebrate the end of his first tour and also him being home.

His parents come through the front door with his suitcases while he's still getting his guitar from the trunk. "Here let me help you with that, Mrs. Mendes!" You say excitedly as you take a suitcase and set it by the stairs.

"Thanks, sweetie." She takes a deep breath as she looks around. "You really outdid yourself! Shawn's gonna love it." She smiles warmly at you as she squeezes your shoulder.

"Mom! Dad!" Shawn calls out absentmindedly as he enters the house. "I think I may have lost my charger-" his words cease as he looks up to see the decorations and you standing there.

You reach into your pocket and pull out a handful of confetti before throwing it into the air to shower down over Shawn. "SURPRISE!!" You giggle excitedly as you throw your arms around his shoulders.

"Oh, wow," he breathes out as he drops his guitar case to hug you back slightly. "You really didn't have to do all this."

You let go of him so you can properly take in his appearance. He looks slightly different than the last time you FaceTimed, but still his cute self. "Oh! It was nothing, really." You grin happily as Shawn's eyes continue to dart between the decorations and the cake and you.

"Well...let me take my stuff up to my room and then we can catch up," He clears his throat weirdly before turning to head up the stairs.

You look at his parents nervously. "Is he okay?"

"I'm sure he's just a little jet-lagged, honey," his mom assures you. You nod as you force a smile onto your face. Something in your gut didn't feel right from the way that Shawn was acting.

A little while later after everyone has had a piece of the cake, you notice Shawn lingering by the door. When you make eye contact, he nods toward the door before heading outside onto the porch. You close the door behind you and sit next to him on the top step.

"What's going on?" You chuckle as you nudge his shoulder with yours. "You love when I make a cake with my mom's recipe."

His shoulders rise and fall as he breathes deeply. "No. I love the cake," he forces a small smile as he glances at you before training his stare back onto the sidewalk. "I just, uh...I just wrote a couple songs while I was on tour and wanted to get your opinion on one."

"Oh!" You scoff playfully as your brows crease. "Why didn't you just say so? I'm sure they're great," you assure him as he pulls out his phone and headphones.

You place the buds in your ears and let him press play. A slow piano melody begins to play, and it immediately tugs at your heartstrings. You glance over at Shawn who's still looking down to his lap. The lyrics to a song called Running Low start and you sway slightly as you listen.

The further into the song you get, the more your movements slow to a stop. You find yourself staring hard at the pavement of the sidewalk as you feel tears prick your eyes. As the song ends, you take out the earbuds and hand them back to Shawn.

"Wow," you whisper as you sniffle a little bit. "That was, um," you pause before letting out a chuckle as you finish, "sad, to be honest. That was really sad, babe."

He nods slowly, still unable to meet your eyes. "Yeah," he clears his throat. "It was just something that was rattling around in my head..."

A feeling of heaviness spreads throughout your body and it feels like you swallowed concrete. "What, um," you swallow as your throat becomes increasingly dry, "is everything okay?"

"No," he says barely audible. Your breath immediately hitches in your throat and it's becoming increasingly hard to breathe. "No, it's not."

You try to remain calm as your mind jumps to every single worst case scenario. "What's wrong? You can tell me anything, babe..."

"I know," he sighs deeply. "But, we have to stop seeing each other." Just like that, the breath is pulled from your lungs and you’re struggling to stop your hands from shaking. He said it quickly, like ripping off a band-aid.

You wanted to ask questions. But you knew that if you did, your voice would break and you didn't want him to hear you like that. You try and force air into your lungs as you stand up slowly. "I'll see you at school," you whisper as you go down the steps and head to your car.

Shawn stands and follows you quickly. "Y/n!" He grabs your hand and you pause, waiting to hear what he has to say without looking at him. "You understand what I said, right?"

"Yeah," you choke out as you roll your eyes slightly while the tears build in them. "You're breaking up with me. Anything else?" You kept your tone small and quiet so you wouldn't sound like how you felt inside. Like every piece of your heart was shattering.

He tugs on your hand a little bit, but you remain facing away from him. "Anything else?" He questions in confusion. "Y/n, I just broke up with you and that's all you have to say?" He asks, slightly hurt.

"What do you want me to say?"

"I don't know! Something!" His voice rises slightly. "We dated for over two and a half years. We...shared most of our firsts together. I just expected you to be a little more affected than this.."

You turn around slowly and stare at him. The tears that were building up had overflowed and your mascara was smudging at the corners where you had scrunched your eyes. Your bottom lip trembles as you pry your hand away from his.

"Is this affected enough for you?" You ask plainly. As you wipe the slick tears from your cheeks you sigh heavily. "Guess I can add first heartbreak to that list of stuff we shared, huh?" You chuckle coldly as your sadness fizzles into anger because it's an easier emotion to deal with. "Were you just doing this to see how I'd react?" You ask disbelievingly.

Shawn's eyes widen. "What? No! I would never do that to you, y/n..." You nod along to his words sarcastically, as if you could believe anything that came out of his mouth anymore. "You just deserve more time dedicated to you than I can give you. I mean I barely talked to you all summer and I feel terrible about it-"

You interrupt him angrily. "So you just break up with me instead of trying to make it work?? This is our last year of school together and you're giving up! You're a quitter, Shawn!"

"No! That is not it," he replies sternly. You cross your arms and raise an eyebrow challengingly. "I'm gonna be going on a lot of tours as my career takes off, y/n. Most longer, and more hectic than this one. It'll just get harder to make time for you and I don't want you to feel like I don't love you!"

You throw your hands up exasperatedly. "Great. So you figured you'd just move up that timetable and make me feel like you don't love me now. That's the perfect logic," you lament.

"I do love you, y/n-"

"No." You shake your head as you turn and walk to your car. As you open the driver's side, you look at Shawn over the hood of your car. "No, you don't. At least not enough to try and make it work. Not enough to believe that we could've made it."

He opens his mouth to respond, but you get into your car and slam the door. The tears are back at the brim of your eyes as you buckle your seatbelt and start your car. You look out the passenger window and see that Shawn as walked up closer to the car. A scoff escapes your lips as you pull away from the curb, leaving Shawn in your rearview mirror.