#long ass post bc I already know the readmore hates me
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The FIA Prize Giving 2018 gala was an insane night for Simi, and I want to share all of it!
First, the elephant in the room:
Kimi was absolutely hammered! He caught everyone's eye because he was tumbling around the place, and generally having a blast yapping his mouth off to anyone who would listen to him. Legends said he would do this when drunk, but never had a live audience been witness to it.
Meanwhile, Seb...
Seb had finished second to Lewis in 2018's title battle, and was also seeing the end of his partnership with Kimi at Ferrari.
Kimi's renewal for Ferrari was always rumored to be something Seb pushed for when negotiating his own contracts, so the news the Scuderia wasn't interested in keeping Kimi past 2018 were a sign that Sebastian's wants weren't of huge importance to them anymore, and they were making way for a promising young talent (Leclerc) to take the lead driver role in Ferrari in the years to come.
Sounds like a bad end of the year for a guy with title aspirations, but guess what?
Kimi was there, with so much booze in his system that he wasn't at all worried with maintaining his quiet and taciturn act. And you know how they say alcohol lowers your inhibitions and makes your deepest thoughts come out freely?
That night, Kimi had one mission, and it was to keep Seb happy.
When he caught cameras filming Seb, knowing his friend was a private guy, he jumped in and tried to stop them. Look at his face. He doesn't know what he's doing. He's driven only by protective instinct.
When Seb talked, you could tell he wasn't hearing a word (and at times it seemed mutual)
For a bit there, the cameras even caught Kimi deciding to go for a smoke, and Seb trying to impinge a sense of responsibility on him, only to end up being dragged along.
When they were called on stage to receive the 2nd and 3rd place trophies, it was the funniest shit. There were designated spots on the stage where each driver should stand, but they were quite apart from each other.
You can see an official trying to stop Kimi and take him to his marked spot, but Kimi strode straight towards Seb and stuck decisively by his side. In fact he gestures at Seb, as if telling the crowd to give him his accolades!
His arm was around his shoulders, half offering companionship in what would be their last official act together as teammates, and half supporting himself so he wouldn't fall on his ass on stage.
And of course, we even had a classic Seb moment, where Kimi offered one of the men delivering the awards a handshake, and Seb took it instead. Kimi didn't even care, he rolled with it, because if Seb wants to hold his hand, god damn it he will.
Even when they had to part to grab the awards, Kimi made sure to return to his original favored position of keeping one friendly arm around Sebastian's shoulders asap.
You see Seb turn to him and say something...
It's impossible to tell what, but it looked an awful lot like a "thank you" that carried years of friendship and support behind it. Kimi's eyes transformed at whatever Seb said. his eyebrows lifted and his expression softened.
He told him something to his ear in return, and it made Seb smile again, whatever it was.
Eventually it was Lewis' time to get on stage. He was the 2018 champion, the guy Seb didn't manage to beat, and as such had the right to make a victory speech.
As he does so, the camera caught the losers, Seb and Kimi.
In that moment, that could have hurt a little harder than usual, Kimi put his arm around Seb's shoulders one more time, downed another drink, and swung him closer.
This was it.
This was the end of their partnership.
Simi, nobody will ever do it like you.
#simi#sebastian vettel#kimi raikkonen#FIA prize winning gala 2018#long ass post bc I already know the readmore hates me
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G o d. All gekkos' outertale posting makes me wanna talk more in depth about the characterisation and plot issues in this game and why they bother me...
(readmore bc holy fuck this got long, it's probably like 5k words. It's also pretty much all salt, categorised by character)
Toriel
Why. Why is she like this. Kinda feels like the creator of the game hates her and if they don't, they have a weird way of showing it. She's treated as overdramatic and unjustified in her anger at asgore despite the fact that he DID declare war on humanity and he DID willingly let the people believe he was killing human children to harvest their souls. Even if he didn't do it for real in this game, she has every right to be angry and to not trust him, and it CERTAINLY doesn't make her undeserving to be a mother or whatever. Idk about you, but I don't think wanting kids to stay away from a man yelling about wanting to kill every child that crosses him makes you a bad parent, even if it turns out he didn't really hurt anyone y'know?
They also REALLY zoned in on 'mother' with her in a way that doesn't really make sense here. I could maybe see her feeling guilty for making a snap judgement but how would that call her motherhood into question?
Sans saying isolation messed with her makes no sense too!!!! The outerlands or whatever they called the ruins isn't sealed off in this game, other monsters seem way less intimidated by her in this game than in undertale (she has friends! She knows sans by name and goes to napstablook's shows and even has their phone number!), and we outright get told she takes the taxi to get her groceries... Meaning she headed off to the rest of the outpost and probably does that often enough.
All things considered, Toriel seems fairly well adjusted in outertale, at least by outertale standards. Kinda then makes it feel like everyone's just trying to convince her she's hysterical and that... Sucks.
Also the fact that they added an ending where you stay with her and framed it as a bad ending that doomed everyone is... Really mean? It sucked ass I'm sorry :/
Sans
... Why is he like this. This take on Sans is absolutely infuriating tbh. The only positive I really have here is that his puns are kinda good, I've seen fangames that fuck up this element massively and it was kinda fun to see his interactions in starton.
Okay, back to salt. His whole 'i became a sentry to help humans' thing is trash. He didn't care about that in ut! He didn't care about that at all! The only reason he looks out for frisk is because he made a promise to toriel, and he hates breaking promises. He didn't want to let down his friend.
...Huh. realising this is yet another case of Toriel disrespect somehow. Yet another thing they took from her, that they then just... Handed over to sans instead. :/
His lack of backstory. Look, I get wanting something silly, but they took almost everything that makes sans interesting away. Not hyperfocusing on sans like certain aus do is nice, but it feels like in a lot of situations in this game they overcompensated by a long shot.
No mysterious past/origins. We know he worked with alphys I guess but???? Honestly I have a LOT to rant about for that part so I'll leave it for twinkly's section. And yet despite all this, Sans inexplicably bleeds in tpe when not even undertale has that happen? Make up your mind!
His role in non Asriel chaotic also... Sucks ass. I'm in a pretty awesome corner of the fandom in terms of the people I follow and the takes I see as a result, so if I'm honest, when I saw all those posts about 2024 fanon sans being indifferent to his brother's murder, I kinda just figured they were vaguing about this game. You're telling me that sans of all people just shrugs off you killing everyone and complains a little bit before letting you pass?! He should know alphys already ran off. He should know the only person left to stop you is asgore, and that it's obvious he won't. Part of this could be connected to how frisk is written perhaps, and much like the twinkly situation, I'll have much more to say on that further down.
I understand the creator didn't wanna have a sans fight in their game - however, if that's the case... Maybe come up with a reason for him to NOT show up in the last corridor, then? Have him busy helping with evacuations or something, or already dead like in the first chaotic ending... This was just sloppy.
Papyrus
Honestly he wasn't... Terrible. The phonecalls were fun even if most were cheap references (though they can be fun in fangames sometimes so I'm not mad at this lol). Him being extremely talented at making spaghetti is just one symptom of one of this game's biggest flaws, however. I really don't like how nobody's really allowed to be bad at anything or have any real struggles in this game - especially when spaghetti in undertale is used to demonstrate his relationship with undyne and the similar wavelength they're on when humans aren't involved. She's the one who started teaching him to cook it, it's deeply intertwined with his desire to be a royal guard, and it's something they suck at together. Him just inexplicably being good at it is... Weird, and feels really disconnected from their friendship and her reluctance to let him in the guard yknow?
Also: his boss final phase. Having the dog NOT take his special attack away this time was really funny admittedly but... Idk? Not only is the fight really unfair for pacifist/neutral and those who aren't as good at the game (ut never gets this hard outside of geno), it feels way too on the nose in terms of insisting he's strong and has powerful attacks. Undertale didn't need to overcompensate to get across that papyrus is strong and disciplined and the way you have to infer that in undertale is way cooler. I might just be nitpicking with this point tbh but it's whatever. Letting myself be a hater for once.
And don't get me started on him getting together with Mettaton. It seemed to come out of absolutely nowhere, the idea that they were already friends in this was glossed over really quickly and no time was really put into developing the relationship save for papyrus commenting on finding him attractive every few minutes.
Gotta be honest, I've never been a fan of this ship nor understood its popularity. Papyrus very briefly mentions thinking he's attractive in undertale, but it doesn't really go anywhere and I'm not even sure mettaton knows he exists. It feels like it was just kinda added because it's a popular ship and that's it, not sure it really contributes much to either of their arcs. It was a light-hearted celebrity crush in canon and never really tried to be more.
Oh, oops. Had more to say here than I thought.
Undyne
Not much to say here... I think she was okay, there's nothing super bad with her. I do think the way gerson kinda downplays her/lacks faith in her in the chaotic route kinda sucks and I think choosing to make her non-undying chaotic bossfight harder sure was A Choice, but it's whatever. Undying was weirdly easy in a way that didn't do her much justice. Honestly they didn't do enough with her for me to have a wall of complaints and I can't tell if that's a good thing or not. Her relationship with alphys didn't really amount to much and her lack of understanding of human culture doesn't really hit as hard when she's just talking about random sci-fi things that we have no way of knowing are real or not in this game's idea of the 2600s ourselves, y'know? Her love of anime (that she mistakenly thinks is human history) is pretty absent here except to validate her relationship with alphys in a very shallow way.
The Ghost Family
Hoo boy... Was gonna make this the mettaton section, but I wanted to talk about napstablook at the same time, so I'm just gonna lump them all together.
What. What the hell was this plotline.
It feels like they tried to go for 'smalltime farmer chases passion for stardom after feeling unfulfilled at home' and as I've seen someone else say, 'shy business owner struggles to talk to their cousin outside of work'. This would've been fine tbh, but... There's a lot of things in the execution of this that kinda grossed me out if I'm honest. I don't think they were intentional, but I think it could've been thought through a lot better to avoid some unfortunate implications - or even lean into them in a respectful way.
Firstly, the ghost family intervention was pretty long, awkward, and didn't feel like it really added much - especially when most people playing would already know mettaton's backstory anyway (and his house is still accessible like in undertale!!!!! What was the point?)
Mettaton airing out his family issues on live TV feels very ooc - he keeps that stuff very close to his chest and I doubt he'd like it getting out. Him entertaining any of that out in the open seems... Weird.
Speaking of the intervention, his cousins' treatment of him was horrifying! Part of it seems intentional and it's nice that there's at least one part in the game where characters are allowed to have flaws and do bad things but... There's also elements that feel like you're meant to agree with them? Their insistence that mettaton just come home and everything they did in the past with constantly badgering him to come and help out on the farm were rightfully treated as something that hurt mettaton's feelings and that gave napstablook and the others pause. That's (mostly, we'll come back to it later) fine. He called them out for it and they reflected on it, cool. The way his ghost form was utilised makes me extremely uncomfortable, however.
Napstablook talks about hearing 'the real [mettaton]' in the recording, right to his face, 'the real mettaton' in this scenario alluding to his ghost form. Considering mettaton is a trans allegory, this feels... Kinda gross? In a similar vein, when passing mettaton's quiz barriers, one of the questions is 'what is mettaton's true identity' and you have the option to deadname him (using a name papyrus literally just made up in undertale rather than having any kind of creativity ofc) Alphys' reaction is simply to ask how you know that which... Doesn't feel great. The correct answer is 'mettaton' ofc thankfully, but everything around this particular plot point feels weird. Maybe don't do that w the most prevalent trans allegory character..?
And ofc, they keep insisting he just come home, go back to working on the farm, go back to his family... Idk, gives me vibes of someone abandoning their shitty transphobic family and then insisting they want to see 'the real [deadname] again' and for them to abandon their new life and just go back to the way things were before. Not good.
All of this would still be okay for the most part since the ghost family are painted as being unfair to mettaton... But in true pacifist, he goes back to helping out with the farm anyway and talks about how he thinks he was probably just being dramatic after all, and how 'blooky didn't do anything that bad'
... What?
It takes me right back to Toriel's treatment. Napstablook, Maddie and lurksalot gave no real thought to mettaton's feelings, made it all about them and showed pretty much no support for his transition nor his career! Fuck those guys! It's funny - mettaton is pretty consistently a pompous asshole (affectionate) in undertale but here, I think all his feelings towards his family were COMPLETELY valid. Mettaton outertale didn't do anything wrong.
Lurksalot didn't feel like they contributed much to the story either, save to be yet another character treating mettaton like shit with zero consequences nor narrative judgement. They just made every ghost family event even more drawn out.
And then ofc!!!! Mettaton and Alphys' friendship is so bland in this game! They're two people who kinda know each other and she says some nice things about him in a letter in chaotic but that's about it. Their friendship and the subsequent conflict frisk's arrival brings to it in undertale is the heart of hotland and the core, but here it's just replaced with unnecessary, hard to watch, boring family drama. The two of them have no issues to work out. She doesn't ask too much of him. There's no funny quips and barely any chemistry at all. God forbid either of them have any real flaws.
One last thing: I'm glad maddie gets her mew mew body, it's nice. Wish it was an on-screen moment or something alluded to more though. Some of that time dragging out the family drama could've been used on that instead, y'know? Especially with napstablook getting the mew mew doll... Genuinely thought they were gonna show it to her when they first got hold of it, rather than dragging Frisk into their intervention. She should've gotten to be more mad, too. Kinda a big part of her identity.
Oh, and mettaton's no-asriel chaotic fight was bullshit. It was a nice spamton reference and the first phase was cool, but the second was utter bullshit and dragged out the fight way too long. Attacking him after snapping all the wires should've killed him im sorry. It's even more of a shame bc I genuinely really liked this game's mettaton neo fight - it was fun and creative and felt possible.
Holding myself back from adding any more to this bc I could go on and on, ugh.
Alphys
Alphys. For a game that tries to make her the star of it, it's actually kinda impressive how much they managed to take away from her and just how uninteresting she is in this game.
At the surface level she's awesome, powerful, and the star of the show. In my first playthrough I was actually pretty happy to see her thriving like this! The more routes I played and the more I thought about it though they just kinda... Declawed her. Took away all her flaws. Made her 'perfect' in a way that I don't think works at all.
The amalgamates never happened. None of her experiments went wrong. She never hid away from her mistakes, or lied to anyone (save for keeping Asgore's secret, which she has no negative feelings about), nor did she over engineer any situations to make herself seem cooler. She doesn't argue with Mettaton! She's confident and assertive! She's Asgore's right hand woman and next in line for the throne! And ofc, the badass final boss! What's not to love?
...But none of this is Alphys, is it?
Her anxiety isnt just because of the determination experiments, it's pretty clear she's always been a pretty shy and nervous person. In fact, based on her entries they were one of the things she was more confident in before it all went wrong. People are hard, but she knows science, y'know?
She doesn't get to be flawed or interesting - despite her presence, she's just a generic cool scientist who's suave with the ladies, I guess..?
She isn't particularly dorky, shes overly confident, she has zero issues to work through. Her relationship with undyne is perfect (derogatory) and her infodumping about anime just before the archive feels very forced, like they remembered last minute that she does that and thought it should be included somehow.
Depicting what she'd be like in a scenario where the determination experiments never happened is a fun and interesting idea! But deltarune demonstrates how to do that well, and I think they completely missed the mark. The way she talks, her body language, the way she acts around others in general... These things are universal constants and yet in outertale, she's basically a different person entirely.
Outertale alphys isn't allowed to lie (save to cover for asgore Secretly Being A Good Person), she isn't allowed to miscalculate, she isn't allowed to mis-speak or make mistakes or do anything she'd regret. She feels like an alphys written by someone who hates her in canon and thinks all her flaws make her terrible and unlikable. I doubt this is the case since I don't think a person like that would've given her such prevalence, but that's the level of love and attention I feel was given to her writing here. It makes me sad.
And, of course... The DT experiments and her fight.
... Why did she have vials of determination if all the humans are alive? Did she take it from them? If so, was this before or after they went into stasis? We know she's not been the royal scientist for long in relation to how long humans have been falling, so did ROMAN take the determination? How much of this did she even DO?
Why did she and sans even DO anything with determination? It... Doesn't really make sense.
Speaking of determination, why did she melt at the end of her fight? I'd assume she's injected herself with determination as one of the vials in her lab is mentioned to be partially used, but I'm pretty sure it's also like this on pacifist. Was that overlooked? Are we just meant to assume it's MORE depleted? Does she just have natural determination now because She's So Cool And Badass? This isn't even really a complaint about the fight, more just how poorly that part of her lab is handled lmao
But getting into her fight... Idk, it didn't really feel like her. A lot of it was just random bullshit that was hard for the sake of being hard, that didn't really seem to be tied to her identity very well at all. People complain a lot about the Zenith Martlet fight in undertale yellow but that's done far better than this, imo. It clearly reflects martlet's character, personality and canonical bullet patterns (we see Alphys' in ut tpe!), there's a genuine feeling of progression in the fight and the act you're given to help with the fight feels more effective - you can still damage her on her turn, so taking a turn to heal act doesn't feel like a waste. The Asriel acts though... They just don't last long enough to feel that worth it? Sure they're okay, but in general, you get a lot less time to breathe. Martlet's fight lets you retry from phase 2 if you die. Sans' in undertale gives you as many turns as you need to heal while he's sparing you. Alphys' fight just feels like it's made to feel un-fun and painful throughout in a way that just isn't worth it, and doesn't really feel like it fits her personality either, y'know? The fight was just a slog and like many others, I had zero motivation to finish it legit. I don't think it helps that the undyne and mettaton fights in this route are fairly easy and simple in comparison.
Tldr: they took away everything that makes alphys endearing, fun and interesting. This isn't alphys at all.
Asgore
A huge chunk of this essay accidentally got deleted, including my first attempt at writing this section. In it, I mentioned that the Asgore apologism went way too far.
This time though, I don't think I'd even call it that. Reflecting on it, it feels less like an attempt to defend him and more like a way to hate on and spite Toriel.
Seriously. So much of his character basically just feels like someone going 'fuck you toriel. I'm giving EVERYTHING to asgore.'
It's... Really weird?
Asgore having a way out of killing humans is an interesting concept! Outertale takes place 500 years in the future compared to undertale, so the idea that they have the resources and technology to do that is kinda cool and in theory, exploring this idea sounds really fun. In practice though, it feels like it was mostly done to make Toriel out to be an asshole for no reason and to laugh at her for ever assuming he would've really killed anyone (despite... Y'know. Telling everyone that's what he was doing.)
He just. Completely moved on from Toriel without a second thought seemingly, and doesn't even look that affected by seeing her turn up again - meanwhile SHE'S got crumpled up tea recipes in the trash and all the Sad Divorced Energy - it doesn't really fit either of them! Toriel wasn't really given a reason to miss him like that, and I think even if he DID fully move on, he'd be way happier to see her than that.
All his leading statements on how she must feel in LV1 pacifist sucked ass also, especially with the way she kinda just agreed that yeah, she feels like shit for not trusting that he'd suddenly do a 180 and not hurt anyone (AGAIN. AFTER HE CONTINUED TO LET EVERYONE BELIEVE THIS) and that she must feel unworthy of being a mother. She hadn't even said half of this in front of him yet! He put words in her mouth! That in itself would be fine (social blunders are pretty normal for asgore after all) but it... Wasn't treated like that. It was handled as if this was a sweet and compassionate thing for him to say which... Yikes.
And ofc he gets to adopt frisk, and monster kid, and get to have Asriel live with him! His fatherhood is never called to question in undertale, but ofc Toriel's motherhood has to be here. Hell, despite their divorced status, if you talk to gerson in tpe it's highly implied frisk asks if asgore would start aging again if he became their dad! Idk, all of this part just reeked of Toriel hate and nothing more. Asgore is just yet another character to get sanded down and de-clawed and it sucks. So much of what makes him interesting is his mistakes and flaws and how they impact him, y'know?
Twinkly
I wanna start this by saying I don't think his writing is too bad. It's not amazing by any means but by outertale standards, he's one of the better written characters. That being said, Flowey is my favourite character of all time so I'm still gonna be critical.
So they did save the goat. Save the goat aus really aren't my thing nowadays - I feel like so often people act like he's a separate person to Flowey entirely and act like the alarm clock app dialogue doesn't exist. Asriel didn't end the story as a doomed tragedy fated to fade away! Flowey ended the story as someone who finally got closure on the loss of his best friend, and can finally learn to move on, even if it takes him a while to adjust. I don't think he needs to be a goat again for that.
That being said, I know these kinda aus are a big wish fulfilment thing for a lot of the fandom that aren't even necessarily something people want to be canon as much as they just wanna explore the idea and see him truly happy, so I won't judge that element too harshly. People are allowed to have fun, and I think save the goat can be fine if it respects him as flowey rather than separating them.
I really like that they allow Asriel to be fucked up and an asshole rather than him soft rebooting into some Sweet Perfect Little Prince once he returns to his old form, like so many other save the goat takes. Even in lv0's ending he struggles to bite back insults and mean comments aimed at Monster Kid which is... Admittedly kinda refreshing! There's definitely some flowey (or I guess in this case, twinkly) behaviour that still comes through here and I'm glad. This carried over to chaotic, too. While his characterisation wasn't perfect, this at least felt like twinkly obtaining a few form and continuing to play with the world, rather than your standard Asriel take. I also really liked that he remembers and acknowledges chaotic if done before pacifist, that was neat and adds to his character (as far as this game goes) I think.
However, onto the biggest, glaring issue I have with him.
Why. Why does he exist.
No, seriously.
In its attempt to make the world perfect, a world that blatantly only exists so the creator could make a save the goat ending, mind, there's no reason for the goat to need to be saved at all. Nor for him to exist after dying back when Chara lived with the dreemurrs.
Asgore isn't killing humans, so the souls don't need to be absorbed by anyone. Frisk can just enter the archive and lend their power to destroy the forcefield themselves, so there's no ultimatum like there is in undertale - there's no implied tradeoff of Frisk's life for the freedom of monsters without twinkly's intervention. In undertale, flowey's messing around opened up an ending that would've otherwise been impossible, something that worked for everyone.
Without him existing at all here, frisk could've broken the barrier just fine. All it really added to pacifist was a couple extra boss fights and asgore being dead for two minutes. And him being saved I guess but again, there's no real story justification for him being here EXCEPT to pat yourself on the back for saving him.
Why was he created? In undertale it's pretty clear - they wanted a vessel to hold all the souls in for now during the true lab experiments. He exists because Alphys selected the first flower to ever grow in the garden and injected it with determination that she extracted from the human souls.
... But all the humans are... Alive and well in outertale? They don't need a vessel to contain their souls. They don't need to extract any determination from anyone. Again, why do they HAVE vials of determination? And why did she inject one into a flower?
AND THAT'S THE OTHER BIG THING. It's established she and sans injected a starling flower for... Whatever reason. SO WHY THE HELL IS TWINKLY A CARTOON STAR?!
This point makes absolutely no sense at all. He looks absolutely nothing like a starling flower nor does he behave like a flower at all, which is confusing if that's what he started as. Honestly, I think it would've made more sense to just keep him as Flowey if they were gonna include him at all, and just have his appearance reflect a starling flower instead of a golden flower.
This applies to his fight too. Mechanically I think it's AWESOME, but the visuals are... Just very very boring. A huge part of why his fight in the original is so good it's the bizarre and chaotic nature of it, the horror elements, and the way so much of flowey's trauma in terms of how he was created and the things he finds scary was put on blast for all to see. The combination of mechanical and organic elements, all the plants and insects... Idk, just going 'hmm he's a star. Let's have him go through a star life cycle' is boring, there's no visual appeal.
If his creation is so vague and wishy washy, this would've been a great opportunity to flesh it out more. How was he created? What kinds of technology and machinery did alphys use to put all this together? How did she (or roman????? unclear) get the determination? What does twinkly remember?
That leads me onto a tangentially related topic - his trauma. I... Don't think this was shown very well. He talks a bit about BEING traumatised from the lab, but telling isn't the same as showing and canon flowey is terrible at hiding it, whereas I'd just as easily believe outertale Asriel made it up for sympathy points. He never really projects, he doesn't force anyone else to experience anything like he did, nothing like that. He's just a cocky asshole who likes killing, and who eventually decides to start being nice.
This game constantly seemed to be speedrunning ways to get him from being twinkly to being Asriel as quickly as possible in almost every single route which... Huh???? It's weird. Would've been nice to let him be a star more rather than just Asriel...
(final amendment bc I lost a huge chunk of this essay originally and had to rewrite it, and I'm realising I didn't manage to fit this in this time... How does a single monster soul let him get his Asriel form again? Sure he's still treated as if soulless and it doesn't make him a good person, but if he was 'so tired of being a star', why hadn't he tried doing this sooner? It makes no sense...)
For a game that exists to give him a good ending, it's so ironic how little he needs to exist at all in this world. Just goes to show what it looks like when you go too far with 'fixing' things or removing stuff you seem 'too problematic' for the sake of being wholesome or whatever.
Chara
Speaking of which... Look I'm just gonna say it. This version of Chara sucks so bad.
Chara is one of my favourite characters - they're really interesting, morally grey, and a fascinating way for undertale as a game to interface with us as players.
They're a child who likely saw the worst of humanity, then found themselves in a home with family who genuinely loved them once they fell down and met the monsters. Their intense saviour complex made them feel like the best way to help their family was to sacrifice their own life to get enough souls to break them free (and once they realised they had control, get payback against the humans while they were at it). They could be mean-spirited and a prankster. They valued efficiency HIGHLY. Their favourite number was nine because it's the limit, the absolute, a way to stop hurting and to stop others hurting.
And by doing geno, you can push this fixation on stats further. Max out all your stats. Gain power. Get stronger. Become invincible. Nobody can hurt any more if the world is gone. And ofc, they stand as the final arbiter of consequences for the player. Your punishment for killing everyone and for pushing them into believing it needs to be completed. Chara both IS is and is separate from us in a way that can't really be fully disentangled and it's really, really cool.
Anyway, enough gushing about undertale Chara. What's outertale Chara in comparison?
... Nothing.
They're nothing.
Outertale Chara narrates occasionally. They're a ghost that follows frisk around, but aren't confined to that, and have been actively wandering the underground since their death. They also still have a SOUL for some reason? This part doesn't really make sense at all.
Other than sacrificing themself and maybe wanting to take out a few humans after Asriel absorbs them, they don't do anything that could be considered bad ever. The most devious thing they ever do is snatch Asriel's diary to leave a silly comment in there when they first arrive at the outpost (sans does this with Toriel's phone in undertale tpe for comparison lmao). Despite what Asriel seems to believe, Chara is completely absent from the chaotic route - never getting corrupted, never caring about our stats, never wanting to hurt anyone, never even trying to make us face any consequences. They're just... Not here. For a character so prevalent in the murder based route of undertale this is fucking wild.
They all but vanish if you so much as say something slightly mean to someone, too! It's strange, makes no sense, and just like with sans, it feels like they overcompensated waaaaaaay too much for the people who insist they're evil. On top of that, if you do chaotic before lv0, they don't even remember chaotic happening! They'd may as well have just been a member of the ghost family who likes following Frisk around when they're especially nice. Like Asgore and alphys, they've been sanded down and de-clawed to be 'wholesome' and 'perfect', and it just results in a bland, boring character who loses anything that made them interesting, nuanced and fun.
'Chara wasn't the greatest person'... Why, though? They don't have enough substance in this game for that line to really have as much impact.
Frisk
I'm gonna be honest - I actually ADORED their frisk at first, and I think that's because I started with a neutral run and ended up drawing them a lot. They felt silly and mischievous and interesting, and this continued into chaotic. They seem pretty chill with what's going on but then take that even further by being hilariously affectionate with Asriel and still doing silly things like being up for picking up the electrodampening fluid or drinking directly out of the fountain. They felt like a funny little mini-kris (save for being okay with all the murder ofc).
Then uhhhhhhh... That's when I experienced the second chaotic ending, the one without Asriel, as well as lv0. I feel like they definitely DID try to lean on the Kris angle on purpose in terms of their feelings on being controlled and stuff but it???? Just doesn't work very well? There's no ambiguity to this version of frisk once you've seen all the routes. Just like EVERYONE ELSE, they're just a perfect little angel who would never do anything wrong and anything past lv0 is just the eeeeeevil player influence or whatever. Come on, we have deltarune for that kinda approach to control 😭 (though even then, Kris is a layered and interesting character who isn't goodness and innocence personalised, and that's why they're cool)
In undertale, we have no idea what frisk is like as a person. WOULD they spare everyone without our influence? Would they kill? Would they be a scared child lashing out in self defense? Would they run from everything, then give up and let themselves die permanently somewhere? We just don't know! We're not supposed to know! It feels like it went back to the very early fandom interpretation where frisk is Good And Sweet and Innocent while Chara is evil incarnate - except this time they're BOTH the former.
It's a contradiction too! Why in the Asriel chaotic route are they so down to follow him, and pet him, and hug him every chance they get if they don't like all the stuff we're making them so? The player has no influence over Twinkly. Every single thing he did, he chose to do, and yet even if the only time frisk has seen him was him destroying their mercy button and forcing them to kill for him, they seem to love him to pieces and go along with whatever he says happily. What.
I feel like they didn't know what to do with Frisk here at all and it shows.
Other characters
This has been ridiculously long, but to quickly go over non-major characters... They did very few things to make Roman seem interesting, the amount of stuff hes implied to have helped Asgore with just reduces even further any influence or impact alphys had, and (a smaller nitpick)... Why didn't he use times new roman as a font when we DID see him speak in the archive/on the signal stars? It's such a missed opportunity...
Burgerpants was fun... Kinda. Developing him like this feels like something that should've happened DURING the actual game rather than before it though because it made him feel like a whole other person entirely? The poisoned food was very funny though.
Why is Snowy now Stardrake when his dad hasn't changed at all and Crystal looks like any other snowdrake? That was bizarre.
I actually really liked the humans! Establishing them as actual characters was really fun, and I especially like justice. Justice, at least in my opinion, is probably the most interesting character in this whole game tbh - someone who tried to do good but ultimately caused more harm than good, while NOT downplaying it, showing the consequences directly, and showing them work to try to make things better. The way we don't grab their item like the others in the twinkly fight nor go through an area for them in the archive (and just talk to them instead) really adds to their intrigue - what are they like? Who did they know? Is there something they don't want us to see? How are they strong enough to not need us to grab their weapon at all to lend their help? I think it's get funny that the only character I'm fully praising is the clover-adjacent one. Justice outertale they could never make me hate you
(that being said... seeing the way this game is clearly just supposed to be a 'fix' for undertale does sour my thoughts on the humans a little. did they only do this bc they thought them NOT being full characters in ut was bad/a problem with it? 🥴 This applies to the additional monster kid story focus too).
Speaking of monster kid... Them being an orphan was clearly just a plot device to give asgore more kids and therefore feel like he won more than Toriel. Monster kid in undertale seems like they probably did have real and loving parents, and they have a sister too!!!! Would've been nice if they'd at least done something with their sister :(
This got... Way longer than I expected, so I'll stop here. But outertale definitely gave me an even bigger appreciation for other ut fangames. My gripes with deltatraveler section 3 feel much smaller in comparison now, if tsus misses the mark on Flowey later down the line they've at least already done most characters so much more justice, and it really puts into perspective all the heart and soul that went into kissy cutie, as well as its genuine love got the source material and characters.
Sorry outertale, you weren't for me. That being said, if anyone disagrees with any of this then that's fine! These are all just my opinions and feelings on it after going through all the routes and talking about it with friends. Media is always gonna resonate with different people in different ways and that's a good thing! If your perspective on any of this is different and if you had way more fun with it, I'm glad you did and I genuinely wish I could've felt the same. I feel like at the very least, making it has probably been a great learning experience for the devs and I really hope they carry on making games and improving their skills. Hope y'all are thriving and having fun regardless 💙
#xan plays outertale#I'm not tagging it w the actual game name. that wouldn't feel right#again: most of this is salt. it's also an opinion piece#it was just nice to get my thoughts out there yknow?#if anyone manages to read all this i respect your perseverance tbh lol
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pass2 ramble ab/share your headcanons ab your favs 🙏🙏⁉️⁉️⁉️
you have unleashed the visty paralive demons >:). cracks knuckles. this is long as hell so under a readmore it goes!!
shogo:
with the little amount of sleep + insomnia this guy has his ass should def be close to if not already having a caffeine addiction. however i think he eats enough sugar regularly for it to balance out
adding on to that this guy cannot drink black coffee. idc if canon says anything different. he wont drink it unless its almost just milk
a journal hoarder. i do think he actually uses all of them eventually but he always has like. 2 empty ones somehow.
had one of those 3 am cut + dye your hair breakdowns as a teenager. it was when he was 15 and literally the night before he retired from the film industry bc his hair looked like his dad's at the time and he was one interview away from snapping on camera
touma
yknow those tiktoks where its someone with a 35+ step facial care/night routine. yea thats touma
she's transfem also. to me. for silly reasons its bc theres no women inthis goddamn franchise and touma's my highest fave who isnt already trans/transcoded
for serious reasons i do think that it could connect to what we have revealed of her trauma
stocks up and has a stash of cosmetic store coupons that she spends all at once after exam season
her hair is sooooo soft despite the fact its been bleached to hell and back. touma tell me ur secrets please
kantarou
i've said this before but has enough phone + backpack charms to use that shit like a warhammer
has a tumblr acc argue w the wall. kenta has one too to me and i just knwo the two would be in each others dnis
is barely in touch w his parents bc of their work. however he tries to keep in touch w his grandma consistently even after moving in the the visty living situation (he gets her free tickets to shows!)
was super homesick after he first joined visty and had to move in together like it was bad
not a hc but i am obsessed with how he lies about his least favorite foods. "[dislikes] Tapioca (he hates the way it looks), but if you ask him, he'll say it's green peppers" there's something so wrong w him
aoi:
if they were to ever play bandori they would attach themself to kaoru seta like a duckling to its mother. kin assignment style even
surprisingly good at carnival/crane games!
aroacespec. to me. yes i know their whole schtick is how they want to be a prince and the inherent romance that comes w that however. they are my favorite and hence get my arospec isms. i like to think that despite not actually being attracted to anybody, acting out that prince role still gives them that gender euphoria
also canonically a journaler but is more organized about it than shogo
was briefly living w their aunt before joining visty due to their relationship w their parents getting strained
groups hcs time
everytime visty has a movie night aoi/kantarou/touma like. thoroughly checks the cast list + directing credits bc early in the tradition there was a yamatodad feature jumpscare and then shogo spent the next 2 hours in the bathroom
they have matching friendship bracelets! kei had one too so when he left they had to remake them so there would be that constant reminder (they all still keep the old ones somewhere tho. even kei)
shogo and aoi watch cooking/baking shows together and try to replicate their favorite recipes
i am a kantaaoi besties no 1 supporter. like ive said this in another post but i don’t think they had anyone their age that they were super close to before each other
they do hair dye touchup livestreams
#the solo hcs ended up being long too oop....welll whatever ive yapped for longer in the prri tag#inbox mail#pastellmochi#sal 🍡#paradox live#paralive#visty posting#visty#shogo yamato#touma hikage#kantarou misuji#aoi kureha
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now I'm curious, what other opinions abt the dub do you have 👀👀👀 me and my friends think karamatsu sounds like markiplier
RAY CHASE BESTIE I AM SO SORRY but no youre rightJKGHFJGH
THIS GOT LONG IM PUTTING A READMORE
i do actually really really like Ray Chase as kara but the way that Nakamura pitches his voice down for him and then when something karamatsu isnt like. prepared for or whatever happens he goes back up into his regular vocal range or sometimes a bit higher really adds to karamatsu's whole. everything HJGKHFJGH LIKE his whole identity pretty much IS performance so even his voice being part of his front is so fun to me, Ray Chase's voice feels so naturally deep and smooth that its like. his voice is Too Cool for kara yknow like his voice being Actually cool? karamatsu fucking wishes JHKGJFGHD BUT i do think he is one of the better choices that the casting directors made compared to the rest of the brothers
(AGAIN NOT SHITTING ON THESE EXTREMELY PROLIFIC AND TALENTED VA'S this is just my opinion of them as the ososan characters)
like i said before i have Absolutely zero qualms with Max Mittelman as Totty literally thats a match made in heaven I think he was perfect for the role n absolutely killed it hes so funny and from what ive seen the writers actually gave him so many good lines big ups for todo likers
Kyle McCarley as Ichimatsu i honestly havent seen much of his performance but god did he put is whole pussy into the one episode where he INSISTS they have to respect each other, hes honestly really really good at maintaining the monotone voice while also conveying a lot of emotion through his voice its pretty impressive that he can do the yellingscreaming while keeping that up, Fukuyama Jun's like. jump from monotone to YEEEAAGHHK when ichimatsu is At His Limit is really really funny so i think that these two are pretty much on par with each other while putting their own spin on how the character . i dont know. expresses himself i guess. poggers :thumbs up emoji i cant use cus im typing on desktop:
in a ranking id prob put Ray's kara here but i already did him so. just. in case u wanted to know this is where he goes to me lmfao hes pretty on par with Kyle's ichimatsu to me tbh
Billy Kametz as Osomatsu honestly worked pretty well osomatsu is the most some guy ever and when u listen its like. a little over the top(obv bc its an anime dub) but its definitely a voice youd hear and go yeah ive probably walked past someone what talks like that, again Great delivery on some lines, he does sound a lot less SillyGoofy #girl... frat bro vibes in there tbh But i mean if he was american i guess he kinda would be huh GHJFGHDF he kinda lost how cheeky he sounds in jp also like there are moments but for the most part :( also the way they wrote him (again i havent seen much but from what i Have seen) he doesnt have the same I Love My Little Brothers energy idk how to describe it they all feel like they hate each other more rghjbhjgh
Sean Chiplock ouygugh im so sorry king but also not it for Choromatsu...... casting directors, voice directors, whoever else is involved in the process, if youre gonna cast around your initial reactions to how the characters are why doesnt he sound like a fuckin nerd!!! i get that hes initally played as a Straight Man but you didnt have to Just Some Dude him make him sound like the loser he is!! even like a little nasally! i also think he sounds a little too much like Billy's Osomatsu, (which again not the va's faults i feel its a voice direction issue) when they talk at the same time its kinda hard to tell em apart which might be on me for not watching enough and getting used to it but... sorrie... no from me
Michael Sinterniklaas i have so much repect for you but.... i already said in that other post, the voice they okayed..... everything he was made to say....... no. thats not jyushimatsu. that fuckin. companion character in some fantasy anime ass voice, his whole deal in the dub is too childish imo and i get why that was their first impression but oough his character suffers so so much for it moreso than any of the others.... they massacred my guy..... and this is absolutely not a dig at Michael, ive seen his other work hes incredibly talented, just everything they got him to do as jyushimatsu makes me take critical damage in real life my hp bar drops so so much
Also i really like Cassandra Lee Morris as Totoko but I feel like she doesnt capture the flip between teehee totoko chwwaaannn and KILL KILL KILL voices that Aya Endou manages, he voice is very cutesy, but i feel like she doesnt sound mad enough when totoko gets pissed WHERE IS YOUR ANGER? YOUR RAGE??? RISE RISE RISE RISE RI
also also Keith Silverstein as iyami is honestly really good i didnt really know what to expect but i feel like hes p spot on, idk how iyami-likers feel abt him though lol ask telly or sth HJGHJ
SORRY this got long but i probably was never gonna be happy with the dub, im not gonna get too much into the writing in the localisation but ough. it is Just a comedy show to the dub writers and i can respect that, but the show means a lot to people Because of the characters and how they clearly run deeper than they appear thats a huge part of the appeal for ososan imo and i feel like a lot was lost in the translation. But! it can be pretty funny sometimes and thats all it rlly needs to be, funny haha penis anime
im gonna try and give the dub another shot, ill do me best to grit n bear through it GHJFG
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Blorbo thoughts demand blorbo questions.
If Cass hates his family so much, why does he keep his surname? If he hates Theo so much, why doesn't he shave/dye his hair?
On one hand his hair is his identifying feature. He is called the Red Wayfarer because of it. On the other it is something painful. Why does he choose to keep the label given to him when he has so much power in his own hands to end his hair reputation at any moment he wishes? Is he not aware that he could just do it? Or is there some mental barricade that keeps him away from it?
Answer to all of this can be boiled down to spite. But it's more complicated than that, obviously, and it's probably gonna be a long boi, this post, so I might plop a readmore somewhere lmao
But yeah! This man runs on spite and sarcasm. He did consider changing his name to Sero's, but in the end, decided against it because he knows he's the first Wayfarer in the Inteus family (he doesn't know if there were more magiani, though, or if they were carefully hidden away just as he would've been had Cenric not knocked on his family's door.) Being a Wayfarer was his choice, first choice he ever made for himself for real, and he wanted to put a middle finger to the idea that Vestran nobility just doesn't have those pesky magiani children. He was also around 18-19 when he made that call.
He also cannot see himself as anything other than an Inteus. Theokleia haunts him - he's defined himself in relation to her since he was born. The identity of Wayfarer was just slapped on the already existing, aching underlayer of "unwanted son of Theokleia and Aiantes" that he can't shake off no matter what. He's always been told he's an Inteus, in a weird way, only very, very, very inherently bad at being one, so he went, 'yk what? fuck you. i'm purposefully breaking the mold.'
As things are right now, I don't think he'll ever be able to not be an Inteus. He might accept it and divorce it from Theokleia later, but right now, he cannot be anything else.
On the subject of hair, though...
It is his identifying feature, for sure. If you know Theokleia, you can guess they're related bc of that alone. But not simply because of that - I'll plop Cass and Theo I created in DAI for comparison.
He's his mother's freckled, carbon copy but with red eyes. Him dyeing his hair (because shaving isn't an option - that bit of Rhesainian/Vestran beauty standard is too ingrained in him to even consider shaving it) would be only 50% of the resemblance gone. And if he's gonna be Theo's mini-me, he decided, he's gonna do it 100%. Go big or go home, right?
And over the years, he's grown to accept it as part of himself. While he's still Theokleia's son overall, he's also a grown man in his own right so right now, at 31, he's in this weird position of both being very separated and very tied to her. He won't consider dyeing it right now and would laugh at your face if you suggested it, because he's accepted that he also has red hair, somewhat separate from Theokleia. If that makes sense.
(Fun fact - the hair is passed down from Theo's mother, Euanthe, who is not originally of the Inteus line. Right now, the redheads of the family are she, Theo, Cass and Cass' youngest sibling, Aftonio.)
As to the origins of the nickname, he got it after the Vestran civil war. He basically resisted Vasco in joining his side of the war for the crown, but Vasco used Cass' actions in the process of trying to locate the missing Guild acolytes that he was hired to find to aid his cause, which Cass greatly disliked and in order to get away from all that professionally, he just went with the nickname the people gave him. He ended up using it as a persona of sorts to protect himself emotionally from the world, though.
On top of the acceptance of the color (which is a huge ass win, all things considered) if he got rid of the red, he'd be willingly putting his shield down. That he cannot allow. In a situation in which he has no other protection, he can't let the Red Wayfarer go.
#cassposting on main#have i invested you guys into this man yet.#because he's been on my mind a lot lately#and he's my sonboy#and a blorbo#and i love him very much#also first theo picture on the blog!#ty for indulging me <3
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man fatphobia in tma fandom... i hated how none of the other characters were ever drawn as fat. no one else just the soft uwu squishy bean (how fandom characterized martin actually made me hate him by the 3rd season lol) which is like... i made me So Uncomfortable as a fat person. and the way jon was portrayed as unhealthy skinny got like.. borderline fetishy at times especially in fic and like. its hard for me to blame this on other people and i wouldnt want anyone who wrote him like this to see this ask and feel bad but the constant waxing poetic abt like his thin wrists and exposed ribcage and whatnot was genuinely super upsetting to me and really effected my body image especially because the only fat character they ever thought to write was like... idk how to describe it really but like there was a very clear disparity in the way they were described and meant to be related to by the reader u know?
also straighttma my beloathed... they had this like disgustingly fatphobic post about flesh avatars (cw for extreme fatphobia but if u just search for "straighttma fatphobia" in the search bar it should be the first thing). i understand its a parody blog but some of the posts and that post in particular especially was just legitimately upsetting. especially since it was anon submitted and i have no way of knowing if thats coming from a thin person or not... and in general i dont really find an expicitly bigoted version of a show particularly funny. like ive definitely made and enjoyed jokes about like characters being cishet reddit bros or whatever which i think comes with an implication of bigotry but... idk i just didnt like it
my response gets long so readmore time. i posted under some tags for bl, if youre in one of these tags and see this id prefer no reblogs on this
i never really got into fanfiction in general aside from reading maybe one or two on sparse occasion, so i cant lie and say ive experienced similar to you, but based on the art ive seen during my time liking the podcast, those descs of martin & jon do check out. (aside from that one artist with tall & fat jon, that was cool.) im sorry youve experienced that, i know one of the reasons people participate in fandom is to find belonging and seeing someone portray people like you in an unempathetic way in that setting must have been incredibly hurtful. i think its important for any media creator to understand that when they write diverse body types, sexuality, race... etc, that their intention shouldnt be to score diversity points, but to communicate to readers that arent cishet white thin abled (etc) that your artwork is also for these people
also god i forgot about straighttma... i couldnt find the post you were looking for bc tumblrs search is busted as hell. i think straighttma was kind of funny as like a 1-post idea maybe but as an entire blog idk, especially since the whole show was ALREADY full of shit youd expect from a white british guy. its sort of like, oh heres a way to sort of imagine awful people in a joking context (and i feel like white people are often looking for a reason to make racist jokes anyway), and also simultaneously makes the indirect statement of "arent we so grateful that the show and creators ARENT like that? arent we glad to get good representation?" even though the show and representation sucks ass honestly. its like the opposite of media criticism
i know i keep going back to this point and i absolutely dont intend to direct attention away from what youre saying bc youre 100% correct, but it feels like the fandom would have done everything in their power to kiss jonny sims pasty ass and defend him to the death. and it was incredibly stupid.
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Okay so we all know who your top ships are... who are your unpopular ships? Or obscure ships? What characters from what series do you think about often in either good or bad ways? Who is a character that you hate that others love? If you could rewrite a story or part of a book, what would it be and what would you do differently?
Ok I am digging through my brain right now bc if I’m not able to hyperfixate on something then I tend to forget I even liked it. Ok buckle in bc this is gonna be long af. YOU ASKED FOR THIS, REG.
I’m putting a readmore so as not to torture my followers lol
Thinking about Veronica Mars. About Veronica/Logan. Do they have a ship name?? But I love that show and i was THERE for them. They were kind of a surprise ship for me, in that when they got together I was like, wait, WHAT? Like I was totally caught off guard. But there first kiss is, like, sooo romantic to me haha. It’s my fave scene in the show. But Logan is suck a prick sometimes. And they break up like every five minutes. And every season Logan gets accused of murder which of course he ends up not being the murderer. And they get back together eventually and I’m like really? But deep down I am rooting for them lol. I really enjoyed the new season of Veronica Mars that came out last year, actually. The ending made me SO SAD THO.
I also used to watch Supergirl and I thought Kara and Mon-El were adorable. He was very Carswell Thorne-esque, RH, I *think* you would like him. I never watched past season 3(?) though, and he shoots off into space and I never caught up so a few months ago I actually googled what happens and [spoiler] he ends up marrying someone else in the future or something so I was like, ok I’m not investing any more time in this show lol. (Also I had to google Mon-El’s name just now bc i forgot which is a bad look BUT I WAS REALLY RIDE OR DIE FOR THEM FOR A WHILE lol). Also I loved Martian Manhunter in this show, he was my favorite character. But the CGI for him was awful, omg. He had practical makeup at first, they should have just stuck with that.
Speaking of Martian Manhunter, I also used to watch Young Justice and loved Miss Martian/Superboy. Am I basic??? lol oop. But I love basic love stories. Anyway, I thought they were super cute. In season 3 though they’re kind of on the rocks. I haven’t watched season 4. I also loved Artemis/Wally West, but of course that had to end tragically.
Also, let’s talk about Nightcrawler. Allow me to set the scene. Little Kat is 13 and just rediscovered the cartoon she saw a few times as a kid called X-Men: Evolution. And thus, a weird obsession with the German, blue demon boy began. I loved Kurt Wagner. In the cartoon he starts a relationship with Amanda Sefton and I thought they were a-dor-a-ble. She accepted him for who he was, and they had a really nice healthy relationship. A lot of ppl shipped him with Kitty too which i am honestly all for idec I JUST WANT THE BLUE BOI TO BE HAPPY.
Can we talk about A:TLA too??? Like, obviously Zutara, amiright? Power couple. Like, Kataang is.. fine, but its probably my least favorite part about the ending, haha. Also, consider: Tokka. Toph is bae and can get anyone she wants, and she clearly had kind of a crush on Sokka and I think they could have been awesome. It actually kills me that they never say who Lin and Suyin’s father is in LoK. I had a whole theory that it was that kid The Duke from Jet’s band based on like 2 scenes from the series. There’s a tumblr post I made about it somewhere in the ether lol.
I also just remembered Tahnorra (Tahno/Korra) from Legend of Korra. It’s hard for me to explain this one. It’s a weird combination of being hyperfixated on the first season of the show when it came out, and I think I stumbled upon some fic or something???? And I thought Tahno was hot or something??? And FUN FACT, he was voice by Rami Malek BEFORE HE WAS COOL. So like before Rami really got big I knew who he was. He also basically played the Avatar in Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2 and I thought that connection was hilarious. It was kind of a problematic crack pairing but there was one author in particular whom i follow to this day hoping she’ll update her Tahnorra fics…. *sigh*
Okay one last ship…. I used to be ride or die for Outlaw Queen in Once Upon a Time (aka Regina/Robin Hood). Like, before TLC, I had a personal tumblr renaissance for that ship alone. My only existing published fanfic is for that ship. Taylor Swift’s 1989 came out that year and I related every dang song to that ship. I loved Regina so much and I just wanted her to be happy. That show is a dumpster fire, though, and spat all over my hopes and dreams. *sigh*
Also, lightning round for obscure pairings I ship and/or never talk about:
Frank Castle/Karen Page (The Punisher) ok this one isnt that obscure but I never talk about it… but the pining, oh god the pining
Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth (GoT) THEIR 5 SECONDS TOGETHER ARE THE ONLY WORTHY PART OF SEASON 8. everything after that never happened
I already listed Roy Mustang/Riza Hawkeye (FMAB) as a top pairing previously but I feel the need to mention it again bc it was for real my OG OTP… LIKE U WANNA TALK ABOUT PINING…. *sobs*
Percy/Annabeth (Percy Jackson and the Olympians) This used to be my fave book series and i loved how their relationship developed over the course of the books
Neville Longbottom/Luna Lovegood (Harry Potter) ok can we TALK ABOUT THIS??? They were both badass misfits and they were perfect for each other. But noooo JKR has to announce they marry some nobodies…. this is the only change the last movie did right
Midna/Link (Zelda: Twilight Princess) I honestly have no explanation for this lol
Qui-gon Jinn and Shmi (Star Wars) CAN U IMAGINE if anakin had a proper father figure and didnt have to abandon his mother to slavery
Obi-wan/Satine…. (Star Wars: The clone Wars) we know whats up
OK, to answer some of your other questions: character I hate that others love. HMMMM…….
This one seems too easy/obvious but Professor Snape? Like obviously there’s already a ton of discourse surrounding this but he was gross, mistreated his students for years, committed atrocities, couldn’t get over his high school crush, and we’re supposed to believe he’s a hero in the end and HARRY WOULD NAME HIS SON AFTER HIM….. uh no. “Always” is gross.
I’ve literally been wracking my brain for days and I can’t think of any more characters for this. OK I did some googling and I remembered some LOL.
Ross from friends…. I literally can’t stand him. He’s so entitled and just the worst. He tries to act like he’s the nice, sensitive guy, but really he is so full of himself. Joey on the other hand is portrayed as a womanizer but is actually super sweet and I love him
Archie from Riverdale… I have only seen the first 1.5 seasons ish but he is the worst…. we’re supposed to believe he’s some easygoing musically gifted football player but instead he manages to pull off being bland as heck and actually kind of a terrible garbage person
Nick from chilling adventures of Sabrina. I hate characters that are like hitting on the main character even though she has a bf and are like dark and broody and sexy blah blah blah…. I liked Harvey way better. I never finished season 2 tho
Emma Swan from Once Upon a Time? Idk she was fine she just got old after a while
If you could rewrite a story or part of a book, what would it be and what would you do differently?
HM. First, Harry would name his son Remus Rebeus Potter LOL. Ok but real talk there was a headcanon floating around forever ago that Harry should have become a professor at Hogwarts instead of an auror and I am 100% on board
Ok, ok….. what abouuuttt…… OK, is star wars when Han and Leia get together. I like them as a couple, but the entire first half of the movie Han is being such an ass. And when they kiss the first time, he’s being SOOO creepy. It’s like so quintessentially 80s romance. and HERE’S THE THING. They actually filmed (or maybe just wrote?) a version of that scene that WASNT CREEPY. And i’m like WHY DIDNT YOU USE THAT?!? So I like to pretend that’s the version that actually happened.
This part is way harder than the shipping portion. If I think of anything else i’l dm you. I HOPE YOU ENJOY READING THIS NOVEL LENGTH POST OF ME RAMBLING ABOUT MY FIXATIONS OVER THE LAST 10 YEARS. If anyone actually read this far, you deserve a cup of hot chocolate and a blanket
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celestriakle replied to your post “oh my god i fucking HATE the wolf 359 finale no podcast has ever made...”
Man I feel you. Personally I didn’t see a tpk coming and for me that probably woulda been too dark, but I remember feeling so weird about the ending as is, it was just, uncomfortable? It felt like they were trying for a happy ending and def did not get there, there was for sure a balance off. (Keeping in mind I listened like 2 or 3 years ago probably)
yeah i think it was maybe me being used to/having a preference for slightly darker fiction generally gfdhsjkhf i like stuff that’s humorous and doesn’t emotionally fatigue you but the stakes are high as hell and you know that none of the characters are ever 100% safe regardless of how much of a main character they are yk
ok i just started writing and then it got Long so i’m putting this under a readmore, ALSO HUUUGE SPOILERS UP AHEAD OBV FOR ANYONE WONDERING
what put that idea in my head initially was when eiffel almost got sent back to earth and turned back—in my head i was like ah, okay, so that’s the moment where he makes his Choice to come back no matter the cost, they’re gearing up for an Ultimate Sacrifice ending. (now looking back i’m like.... well. i Guess that’s still what was going on but.... lol.)
i assumed that for most of the episode the plan would be “stop goddard+kill cutter pryce and young, get home,” and that towards the end it would become clear that there wasn’t enough time/options/whatever to accomplish all of the above (either that they would succeed in killing cutter+price+young but in order to finish it they’d have to stay on the station as it crossed the red line or something like that, or that they would realize there were no options left besides destroying the station with everyone on board) and they’d have some touching moment as a crew where they reflect on all the development they’d undergone as people throughout the journey and all things considered are pretty gung-ho about accepting what has to happen.
it just feels (to me) like the logical and satisfying conclusion for their arcs! they finally have ALL the answers they’ve been looking for, they’ve succeeded in stopping goddard, etc. for lovelace it would’ve been a pretty kick-ass “the captain always goes down with the ship” moment and honestly a well-deserved /rest/ after everything she’s been through and all the loss she’s witnessed (because... um... can she die? now? of anything? bc it doesn’t seem likely, and ‘going back to earth so i can settle into a normal life again and then watch everyone i know get old and die around me while i stay alive because i’m not fully me anymore’ feels like ... kind of a really cold and sad ending for her, considering everything).
for hera it would’ve been a chance to (once again) reaffirm her humanity and just how much she’s progressed beyond what goddard tried to make her be; a really excellent final fuck-you, ESPECIALLY if the nature of the TPK in question was like “hera has to initiate the self-destruct and pryce is alive to witness this but powerless to stop her for once.”
for jacobi... i mean... like am i forgetting something or did they just not really bother establishing much information about like, what jacobi has to return to on earth? bc it seems like blowing the station could’ve been a way for him to 1) let go of a lot of his guilt/grief over maxwell and 2) a salute to kepler for his efforts (assuming that by the time the TPK happens kepler has already been revealed as a double-double agent + swooced out the airlock)
for eiffel it would’ve been a good conclusion to the Massive amounts of development he had; he spent the entirety of the show slowly and painfully learning how NOT to be an asshole/selfish/basically everything that he Was that contributed to destroying his life on earth care about, and how TO Show Up For the people around him despite getting off on the wrong foot initially. he arrived on the hephaestus as a (mostly) well-meaning but self-absorbed jackass with virtually no concept of boundaries or self-restraint, and by the end of the show he’d Realized this about himself and put in a colossal amount of hard work in order to Be Better... and then at the very peak of that arc, which the audience and the characters themselves have invested so much time and energy into, the decision is just to... throw all of it away? IT’S JUST GDFKSJGHFDK SOOO MUCH MORE FRUSTRATING TO ME THAN IF THEY’D JUST STRAIGHT-UP KILLED HIM because they try to dance around it like “Ahhh but IS he the same person anymore... who can never be sure.... maybe it’s a second chance....” but that logic just doesn’t WORK given the questions+answers about what makes up one’s humanity/personality as established AT LENGTH by like everything else in the show!! according to everything we’ve learned so far from hera/maxwell/pryce etc as they address these questions through the lens of the AI system, the answer to “are you still the same person if you’re physically unchanged but every single one of your memories is altered or removed?” is a resounding “NO.” i hate it when writers spend their entire story establishing certain rules/information/logic and then suddenly make decisions that completely fly in the face of all of it and think it’s a “subversion” when really what that’s called is “a bad writing decision.” i genuinely think they were just too hesitant to actually kill him so they tried to do “the next best thing” but it just... didn’t work the way they wanted it to. i’ll elaborate more on why i think they would’ve been afraid to kill him (beyond just “he is the beloved main character”) in a second
for minkowski... i mean... from a character/writing standpoint, if lovelace, hera, or eiffel (not including jacobi here only bc i don’t think they were QUITE close enough by the end for his death to have caused her As Much guilt as the other three would have) died during the finale then minkowski would almost definitely have to die as well, bc her primary motivation as we’re all very aware is to ensure the safety of her crew above all else; i don’t think there’s a universe where minkowski is okay with leaving herself if all three aren’t with her. BUT i think this became a corner that they wrote themselves into with her by the end, because then (i assume) the dilemma became “well, as much as we might like to, we basically can’t kill off any one single other character, because it will cut minkowski’s strings” WHIIICH is why i think they couldn’t go through with killing eiffel.
ANYWAY. YEAH. ALL THIS TO SAY for me personally an ending where the characters all have to sacrifice themselves, but it’s a choice they arrive at together easily + something they welcome and accept without much sadness/regret because they’ve done everything they could (and, in the case of those crewmembers w active ties to earth, successfully ensured the safety of their loved ones on earth) would’ve made a lot of sense and been satisfying. i’d be sad, definitely, but in an “this story and characters were excellent and i’m sad it’s over” way more than a “wait i’m so frustrated by this ending that can’t possibly just be It” way
#celestriakle#wolf 359 spoilers#THIS GOT LONG OOPS... SORRYgsdfhjkgfhd#dont feel obligated to read all of it im just rambling
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edit sorry this post is both long (if the readmore fails i am truly truly sorry) & longwinded im just reflecting and thinking; (another edit: u can probably just read the tl dr and get it)
anyway allow me to spin some very personally based theory here for a mo while i put off/warm my fingers up from the cold in preparation to email my therapist
so growing up i had, i think only, het ships, but i never quite had the ones you were (narratively speaking) “supposed to” have
in most media i recall when i was a kid, there were like, 2 diff structures of character romance plot arcs in media i consumed, there was the main lead and 2 best friends model, where thered be the star of the show who had outside romantic leads and the 2 best friends (who were always a boy and a girl) would have their secondary romance, OR there were ensemble shows where there was a more clear romance set up between the main boy and main girl, then side characters whod pair off in whatever ways ended up happening. in the first, see: hannah montana, the second, see: zoey 101. obv this isnt a hard rule and there were loads of exceptions but like, lets just say i tended not to care for the romances set up for the main girls in the trio models, or quite as hard for the main boy and girl in the ensembles, and in general if there was an obvious romance between two leads i either didnt care or outright hated it
basically i never liked the ships they set up for us in straight media, as a kid (namely, a girl) i liked being that “ew pink!” “i hate valentines day” sort of contrarian, but what i remember actually disliking was the predictability of it, because i clearly still shipped characters, so it wasnt /really/ that i hated romance, per se
looking back on it i think it was probably or at least to a degree more like that i hated the hetero expectation of it- i can nit pick down to more specific examples of why i disliked the main pairings (kataang, for example, i thought was weird bc katara acted like a mother/older sister figure to aang, and i didnt feel like there was romance between them at all except where it felt shoehorned in) - maybe it was also that i thought it made more sense for a main character to be with someone they clearly already spent a lot of time with and not some random new hot boy in town (i very distinctly remember shipping miley and oliver on hannah montana, and i believe that was the first time i ever read fanfiction @ age like... 11 lol) as is often the case w like these things.
theres another level to this though, which is that i notice i tended to ship characters who were more vaguely similar to each other, like, physically (ie, similar heights, or hair colors mainly) obviously this is funny now since my main pairing is johnlock which is such a physically different ship we can construct them from basic shapes and colors and theyre still recognizable as who they are, but i have some thoughts about this- but i think there might be two interesting things about this again in retrospect
first of all, this sounds silly ik, but shipping the vaguely similar ones as a child’s way of queering heterosexuality is an interesting concept and not that difficult, like, two boys are also vaguely similar to each other in a similar way a boy and a girl with the same hair color and height might be, which is something i thought of a while ago
the other way in which this is really interesting to me now, that i think might have been more actually pertinent to myself as a trans child, is that i think i shipped the characters i did in an attempt to morph the concept of boy and girl? to find the boy counterpart to every girl??? that second one makes more sense actually. anyway, i digress
2 start off i definitely had gender feelings starting from a very young age so i think these observations ring more true than just reflections, PERHAPS
so the first thing i remember shipping, ie wanting them to be together, thinking about it an inordinate amount of time outside watching the films, even imagining them eating ice cream together in their pjs (i was NINE DHFJGghfkg) was jack sparrow & elizabeth swan from potc (basically my franchise of choice as a kid bc i never read harry potter) now this doesnt quite fit the “visually similar” thing bc actually orlando bloom looks more like kiera knightly and is prob due to them like making out in one movie, but i think this works for the “shipping as gender expression” theory, because elizabeth swan dressed up as a boy, spent most of that movie wearing boy’s clothes, etc- meanwhile jack was a wacky pirate which like hello duh i’d want to be. so i wonder if beyond the fact that they kissed and flirted, there was something to this concept of me wanting two characters to be together, meant i wanted to marry together two conceptual things happening with two characters, or absorb the cool dude and the boyish girl characters into each other to make one whole archetype for myself? i likewise shipped aang and toph (toph who, normally doesnt really have anyone to be shipped with, since she likes sokka but he has a gf) who we all know is the VERY boyish girl character, so boyish im p sure her actually being a trans dude later in life is a p decently accepted headcanon (i dont actually delve into aatla fandom though so i can only hope)
another thing about this ship thing, is most of my ships had brown hair (like miley and oliver), just like i always have, and in certain cases the girl character would look a LOT like me (i also shipped logan and quinn on zoey 101, which to my surprise n delight actually came true later (although looking back im like... 11 yr old me is glad they made out a lot but adult me is like uhhh why were the kids on this show making out a lot? anyway thats another issue) and i def was a weirdo girl with glasses and long brown wavy hair) which sort of further fuels my feeling that this was an attempt by my brain to do 1 of 2 things, if my own involvement really was a greater motivating factor in this thing, 1. ship MYSELF with a boy (which is like def possible for my gay kinnie ass, but not quite my thesis here) or 2. morph these boy and girl counterparts by imagining them together, seeing them together, etc
for example, i realize now, when i was a kid i drew an avatar sona for myself and said sona looked an awful lot like how id imagine a katara/zuko fusion would be, and the fact that i shipped zutara (very hard lol) was what lead me down this thought path rn
i feel like even to me this concept sounds weird and far fetched but like, gem fusion made enough sense for someone to write with its clearly, usually, romantic implications and we all “get” that, so whom knows???
another thing ive noticed while writing this is for a good few of these ships you can argue the boys in them can be read gay, like jack sparrow and zuko and aang, which feels even more strongly like me trying to marry my gay boy feelings to my tomboy realities [thinking emoji]
the biggest reason i think this makes sense to me is because when i was 10 i became obsessed with the idea that this boy i was friends with and i were secretly twins separated at birth, like i was so into the concept that we looked alike, i like hoped and wished so hard for it to be true, i wished a christmas miracle would happen for fucking real and a magic door in my house would open and be his new room and itd all work out perfectly! and you might think this was a manifestation of my difficulties with my family and wishing to leave it, but in my dream world my parents were still my parents and he came to live with us- which makes me think the obsession of ME looking like this BOY was a manifestation of my gender feelings, which i think can maybe be traced to this concept of pairing a visually similar, possibly gay, brunette boy to every brunette and/or tomboyish girl
anyway. if you actually read all of this id love it if you lmk somehow (doesnt need to be a like) like this is clearly very long and strange but i hope it makes sense. i think i stop myself a lot from ever commenting on gender or theory or whatever but i am a living breathing trans person who has experienced things and i have opinions and i dont think im claiming anything destructive with this lol i think its not unusual to reflect on the way you interacted with the world as a gay/trans kid
also im obviously not saying that shipping straight things is somehow inherently queer, im not trying to retroactively claim something about straight ships, like, those two characters are still functionally straight, and i definitely also shipped probably all of them for normal shipping reasons (although, kid ones, so less “oh theres a lot of ACTUAL romantic subtext between these two” but rather “oh theyre friends and would be cute together!” (or like they kissed and i was like O: )) but im just trying to theorize about something its possible my tiny trans brain was trying to express- and who knows maybe im not the only one!
anyway i guess the TL;DR is: when i was a kid i had a lot of “unconventional” straight ships- i already observed that i eschewed the main canon pairings in kids media in what was probably my tiny baby brains rejection of hetero culture, but i also actively shipped side characters who looked like me, and also looked like each other (ie, both tall and brunette, a boy and girl counterpart of Each Other) OR characters who seemed to be a gayish boy and a tomboyish girl, and im theorizing that maybe the reason that was was my tiny trans brain wanting to gem fusion those two together because of my Gender Feelings and fuse the boy with the girl and this desire manifested in shipping therefore thinking about a lot these pairings of boy and girl counterparts
#please dont be weird about this post i hope its like understandable what im trying to think about here?#like i dont think its that weird to consider nor am i claiming anything bad or destructive about ppls lives n genders n whatever#purely an observation about myself and the way i consumed media ages like 8-12#in reflection as a gay/trans adult and thinking about what those things might have potentially been expressing or something#i dont know any official queer theory stuff n i dont think that should stop me from thinking my own thoughts so here u go#also i am TRULY sorry if this readmore doesnt work
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the rest of this post will be under a readmore cause its really just for me to have handy an itll probably be a little long
ok so like i said a bunch of times already today, i keep having dreams about one specific tooth of mine falling out??? so now im convinced its actually gonna fall out
anyways now im gonna try and write down and analyze my dreams (or at least the ones i remember) and try to figure out How My Poor Tooth Will Go
so from what i can remember, the first dream i had about this tooth falling out was earlier this month (may) or late april. the dream started out normally?? like more normal than having a tooth fall out i guess…i was in my ap lang class and the teacher wasnt my normal teacher, it was this math teacher at my school that everyone just fucking hates. she was being a real bitch and when i answered one question wrong, she literally kicked me out of ap lang? the whole class like i wouldnt get credits for the class and i couldnt take the exam or anything i was just gone for good. obviously i was pissed about this, so i screamed and kicked things and did my usually anger breakdown thing and walked out of the class, heading to guidance. i cant remember which of these events happened first but at one point i was walking down the hallway (which now that i think of it, seemed more reminiscent of a hallway at my middle school) and i saw 3 of my friends (maybe 4 i cant remember) and they were doing karaoke in the middle of the hallway since there was a tv hanging from the ceiling. paige was singing and she was really getting into it. at another point in the dream, like i said, not sure if this was before or after the karaoke thing, i had to get on a bus in order to get to guidance. while on this bus, i had to talk to this girl i used to be friends with but told to fuck off freshman year cause she was toxic and i wanted to get ride of her. she just talked to me like normal?? like she didnt hate my guts for calling her an annoying bitch lmao?? and i just talked to her normally too which was fucking weird…anyways after i got off the bus, i was at guidance. the door to the guidance offices looked like the? jungle?? or whatever??? like some environmentalist designed the place…there was even a hug recycle bin there. i just kinda stood by the door for a while…i think my Dumb Ass couldnt figure out how to get in the door. i just kinda gave up i literally just said “fuck it i gotta go im late to drama practice” which is weird bc im not even fucking in drama. but nonetheless, i went to drama practice. drama practice was held in some huge ass library and the only other people there that i was talking to were my friend dana and my?? drivers ed teacher??? we were supposed to be practicing a scene from les mis which i guess was what play we were doing (i think?? i was cosette and dana was eponine and my fucking drivers ed teacher was marius…) but instead of practicing, we were just talking about the bullshit that was the fact i was kicked out of ap lang like a week before the exam. and then?? my tooth (top left, second from the front left tooth) just fuckign fell out and i started gushing blood and then i woke up…
after that, i had an assortment of little dreams i can hardly remember where my tooth (the same one as always) either falls out or is pulled out. i remember in one its very violently pulled from my mouth and the only other thing i remember from that dream is that this bitch, holly, was there (she didnt pull out the tooth tho i think mikan tsumiki pulled out the tooth). in some other ones, i remember that my tooth was already pulled out before the dream and i would like keep it in the socket in my mouth and pretend like it was still attached?? which leads me to my other very vivid and most recent dream,
so, this one i had last night. its kinda in the opposite order the first one was in, it started with the tooth and ended with ap lang. so in this one, i started off in a dentists office. my dentist was actually my psychiatrist?? but in the dream i just saw her as my dentist but anyways i was talking to her about my teeth and whatever. she asked if there was anything else id like to say before we ended the appointment (kinda like how she would at my irl psychiatrist appointments) and i was like “oh yeah, my tooth fell out” and i just kinda take my tooth out of its little socket. apparently it had fallen out before (like, i long while before) and i had been keeping it in cause i didnt want people to know it fell out i guess?? and when i showed my dentist she was like “oh you pulled out your cracked tooth huh” or whatever and i got really confused because i was under the impression that it had just fallen right out but she pointed out that the tooth itself was cracked. then the bell rung and suddenly i was in the cafeteria at my school and i had no idea what fucking class i had next. so i was just kinda slowly walking out of the cafe when the fire alarm started to go off. i was super confused cause we had just had a fire drill the day before so it didnt make any sense why we would have another. until the principal said on the loud speaker that it was For Real and i started to FLIP. i finally figured out we had D period next, meaning i was supposed to be going to ap lang so i had to find that class so i would be accounted for. i was about to bolt the fuck out when i noticed my ap lang teacher was like right near me. i asked him why he was down by the cafe and not near his room and he said it was cause theres a lot of stuffed lions (tigers?) in his room and he was having electrical problems so it was only a matter of time before one of them caught on fire. so that was weird. anyways we went outside to where we were supposed to wait if there was a fire and i played some kind of hopscotch? game with some kids ive seen around school but have never talked to. none of them were in my ap lang class but whatever. the fire department quickly put out the fire and we all had to fucking continue school because of fucking course we would. so i went to my ap lang class and looked into the door window of the classroom and it didnt really look like it was on fire it looked more like one of the classrooms in corpse party…we held class in the class directly next to it with the other ap lang class and we were basically coloring. someone stole the seat i was sitting in when i got up for like a second. then like sparks started flying off god knows where and something caught fire and then i woke up.
wow this is already super long…ok well here goes my analysis of the dreams and my prediction.
so the reason im so insistent that i might actually lose my tooth is cause a lot of times, i can correctly predict the future. it happens a lot with dreams especially. like if you know me you probably know im kinda a little psychic ?? in some ways. so im kinda taking this recurring dream as an omen. anyways the fact that in all the ones i can remember, theres something that has to do with school and especially ap lang?? makes me think somethings gonna happen in there. i thought before, in the first dream, the whole ap lang part was because i had my ap exam coming up and i was nervous about it but now that ive finished that and stuff im not too sure. i feel like the karaoke gang will end up being the people i see on my merry way to the nurses office with the tooth in hand, especially dana who has a really big presence in the first and last dreams?? dana was in the karaoke scene, she was there when it fell out in the first dream, and she was in the cafe with me when the fire alarm went off. i think ill probably talk to her about it right after it happens..i dont think she’ll be the reason i get my tooth knocked out tho bc if it does happen in ap lang like i assume then she wouldnt be anywhere near me at the time. i believe the reason my drivers ed teacher was also there was because at the time i had the first dream, i was taking drivers ed. and he was probably marius cause i hate marius and him. also the bitch i hate was there cause i have dreams about her and i being friendly constantly so that means nothing in regards to my tooth. the fact that i was so shocked the tooth was cracked may be my dream just telling me that its gonna crack off and not that it just falls or is just plainly pulled out. my psychiatrist was there because the other day i was wondering when my next appointment was. and the whole stuff with the fire probably came from the fact that we had a fire drill the other day and it also may symbolize the panic and whatever when my tooth fucking breaks off in class. now how exactly do i think itll go down, based on the dream + other stuff??? well like i said, itll be in ap lang most likely. how does one chip off a tooth in fucking ap lang? well right now my teacher is teaching the chinese students that are visiting about american sports so he has a bunch of sports balls sitting on the table in the front of the room. before he comes into the classroom to start class, some kids pick up a ball and play with it for a while. so im guessing my shit luck will cause someone to accidentally hit me in the face with a ball, hard enough to break my tooth. i, or someone else, will then probably have to pull my cracked, loose tooth out of its socket. there will be tons of blood. i will walk to the nurses office and maybe at some point see dana and tell her what happened. and thats what the fuck ive been thinking about all day.
so ya tldr; some kid is gonna knock my tooth out in ap lang probably so
#WOO that was fuckign long#anyways ive accepted my fate i just want my tooth gone#dream log#the world according to britt
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