#long as ive got my suit and tie

[v214egdyz]

Ralsei but he has the fur pattern of a tuxedo cat !

[augustghosts]

Stewy Hosseini x female reader

A classic tale of fucking your ex at your friends wedding. We’ve all been there, I think.

Word Count: 3.9k

Warnings: 18+ pls, minors will be blocked! Not proofread which is defo a warning, lmk if you spot anything ive missed. Smut. Oral f!recieving and protected pinv. Alcohol and drugs are mentioned slightly.

Little authors note sorry: Hey everyone i am actually alive lol. 5 months later i return writing for someone new… not out of character for me. I watched succession for the first time recently (late asf to the party i know) and i read some amazing stewy fics so i thought i’d add my piece because i’m obsessed with him. Sorry to all my tommy miller babes on here, i swear i tried writing for him again but my inspiration for tommy fics seems to have gotten lost. I really struggled when i tried finishing my half way done tommy series lol. But when i started writing this one it just floooowed and i finished it in like a few hours. Maybe my tommy love will come back someday but for now…. This. Hope someone out there enjoys lol <3

You’ve felt eyes on you all night. Everywhere you go you end up meeting his eyes across the room. Eveytime you look over at him, he’s already looking. He should be the one that's embarrassed, you’ve caught him looking at you multiple times, but you’re always the one who ends up looking away first and feeling your skin heat with the embarrassment of being caught. While he shamelessly stares at you over the rim of his glass, that awful fucking smirk gracing his lips and he watches you squirm. Honestly, it’s kinda creepy. And you almost hope he approaches you so you can tell him that.

Towards the end of the night he starts to close in, starts inching closer to you. He starts making conversation with the people around you, people at the bar next to you, and eventually your friends. Asking them how they are, how it’s been such a long time. Then, he finally gets to you. He takes his time looking you over before he speaks and you’re determined not to be the first one to talk, so you let him stare. Both of you standing in silence for a few seconds before he finally speaks.

“You look great.”

”Thanks.” Keeping it simple seems safe. You want to tell him he looks good too because fuck, he does. He always does. He notices your eyes drifting over his suit and tie and he chuckles.

“What are you doing?” You ask.

“Uhm,” He trails off - pretends to think. “I’m at a fucking wedding, and i’m enjoying myself.”

”Yeah?” You ask, he nods in agreement. The way his eyebrows raise tells you he’s still being sarcastic, still mocking you. “Watching my every move all night is how you enjoy yourself?”

“Actually, yes.” He confirms. “Watching you squirm all night was pretty fun.”

”I wasn’t.” You attempt to defend yourself, downing your drink. “I was just-“

“I’ll get you another.” He cuts you off, snatching your glass out of your hand - not even bothering to ask. You almost try to protest, but you don’t see the point. You know him too well, you know how stubborn he is, once he gets an idea it’s hard for him to let it go. If the idea he’s got tonight is paying for your drinks, then so be it - who were you to complain. You sit down on the stool next to you, watching as Stewy makes the bartender laugh as he orders your drinks. You're kind of pissed that you still can’t figure him out sometimes, you know him better than most people - maybe better than anyone, but he still confuses you. It has been a while since you last saw him, but you conclude that he hasn’t changed much.

When he comes back with your drinks he puts yours down in front of you and asks: “Still your favorite?”

You nod, kind of pissed that he got it right. You try to convince yourself that he didn’t actually remember that small detail. That he’s just been watching you order them all night during your staring competition.

“So, how’s your family?” You ask, cringing at how lame you sound. You just don’t want to let him start a conversation you don’t want to have.

He smiles, because he knows what you're doing. “They’re fine. I still don’t see them much, but they’re good.”

”You’re still too busy to see your family?” You joke.

“Mhm,” His smile almost looks genuine as you joke with each other. “I’m always busy.”

“Busy stealing people's money?”

He laughs then, a genuine laugh that makes you laugh as well. God, you don’t want to admit that you missed him. But everyone else just seems so boring after him, you’ve never found the same thing you’d had with him with anyone else.

“You never really understood business did you?” He laughs.

“I understand perfectly.”

“Sure,” He agrees. “I explained it to you enough times.”

“Yeah, and bored me to death.”

”Is that why you broke up with me?”

His question completely catches you off guard and you almost choke on your drink. You almost want to ask him if he purposefully said that while you were taking a sip, but you’re too busy trying to supress your coughing.

“Jesus, it was just a question.” Stewy laughs at you again, his warm hand coming to rest on your back as he watches you almost choke.

“Fuck you.” You say pointedly, after getting yourself back under control. ”You know why we broke up. Also, I broke up with you?”

”You did.”

“Stewy, it was amicable.”

“Was it?” His face goes serious again and you instantly miss the sound of his laugh. You just sigh, taking another sip of your drink. This was exactly the conversation you didn’t want to have.

“I thought you said you were enjoying yourself,” You say after a few moments of silence. “Don’t ruin it now.”

”I lied.” He says. “I always hated those two, I can't believe they actually got married.”

”Match made in hell.” You agree, both of you laugh softly again.

“You know I also lied earlier when I said you looked great.” He says, surprising you. You brace yourself for whatever joke he’s going to make about you, you shouldn't have pissed him off, he can get mean when he’s pissed off. It’s not his fault, it’s just his defense mechanism - but nevertheless you brace yourself for his comment - and he surprises you again by saying: “You look fucking incredible.”

You open your mouth to speak, but no words come out. You opt for another sip of your drink instead and he watches you in amusement.

“I only came because I hoped you would be here,” He continued. You still can’t tell if he’s being serious or not, that damned smirk on his face makes you think he’s making fun of you, but those big brown eyes look so sincere.

“Stewy, stop.” You sigh.

“Come on, baby.” He murmurs, he leans forward in his chair and places his hand on your knee. The nickname makes you tense up. Makes a familiar heat spread through you. “Let me get you another drink and take you up to my room.”

Fuck. He’s fucking good at this, and he knows it. He knows exactly how to get you. You’re trying to think, but the alcohol and the way his thumb is rubbing your knee is clouding your mind. He waits patiently, watching as you look down at his hand and back up to his face. Your eyes stop at his lips before meeting his gaze.

“Alright,” You say, you swear you can actually see his eyes light up. “Go get me another drink and show me your room. Then I'll decide.”

“You got it.” He grins and practically jumps out of his seat. When he returns he holds out his hand to help you off your stool, the heels you decided to wear and the drinks weren’t a good match. He hands you your drink, although you don’t really want it now. His hand finds its place on the small of your back and a fire lights up somewhere inside of you. His touch feels so familiar - comforting. He leads you out of the bar and to the elevators. Punching in the right number before the doors close, leaving you both alone in the small space. It suddenly feels too quiet.

You want to touch him, but once again you don’t want to be the one to make the first move. You don't want him to know how desperate you are for him, although you think he already knows. He’s watching you in silence, his eyes dark and wanting. A look you’ve seen a million times before - a look that makes you excited. The elevator ride is short, Stewy isn’t the type to kiss you in an elevator, and you know that, so you’re not disappointed when the doors open and he hasn’t touched you or said a word.

He gestures for you to leave first, putting his hand on the door so they don’t close on you, or him. Some people would find this strange, the silence, but it’s a game you’ve both played with each other before. A game you both enjoy. He guides you to his room with a hand on your back, just like before. When he unlocks the door and opens it for you, you suppress a gasp. As usual, Stewy needs to have the best of the best. The bride and groom's room probably isn’t even this nice. They probably couldn’t afford it - Stewy can.

“Well?” His voice sounds from behind you.

“Hm?”

”What do you think? You said you would decide when you saw the room. Is it good enough for you?”

”Uhm,” You pretend to think as you set your drink down on the dresser, turning around to dramatically inspect the room. It earns a playful eye roll from Stewy. He knows what impresses you and he knows he already has you. He already had you down at the bar.

“I think it’s okay.” You conclude, turning to face him. He hums in sarcastic agreement, looking you up and down. He’s playing the game again, who is going to end it first. Who is going to lose. You don’t like losing, and neither does he. But honestly, haven’t you already lost? He has you in his room for christ sake. He has you standing in front of him, already dripping and all he’s done is touch your leg a little and look at you the right way. So you put aside your pride and step towards him, you bring your hands up to his cheeks and roughly bring his face down to your, finally connecting your lips.

His hands immediately find their home at your hips, pulling you tightly against him. The kiss immediately turns from an innocent kiss to a hungry and passionate one, his tongue dominating your mouth. You both know each other's bodies so well, there's no need for taking it slow or asking questions.

“Fuck, Stewy.” You sigh as he backs you towards the bed, gently setting you down and climbing over you. Kissing every inch of your skin.

“God, I missed that.” He groans, marveling over the way you sigh his name. “I missed you, baby. I can admit it. I want you so badly.”

You moan softly at his words, at the way his lips feel on your neck - at how right this feels. You had missed him too. He catches you off guard when he pulls away to ask, ”Have you been fucking other people?”

“Sorry?” You giggle, “Why are you asking me that now?”

”Have you?” He presses.

“I ju- maybe.” You stutter, already missing his lips.

”Maybe?”

”I know you’ve been fucking as well.” You accuse, suddenly defensive. You push yourself up onto your elbows, despite still being trapped underneath him.

“Yeah, I have.” He says coolly.

“So?” You ask, irritated. Why was he doing this?

“So, none of them were as good as you.” His words earn an eye roll from you. “Nothing can compare to this pussy.” He adds, his hand sliding down to roughly grip your thigh and bring it over his waist. Oh, shit. His half hard cock is pressing perfectly against your pussy in this new position, the material of your dress and his suit pants keeping you apart. “And, i bet none of those guys fucked you the way i do.” One of his hands comes up to grip your chin, his other keeping him above you. He forces you to look him in the eyes as he asks, “Did they?”

“No.” You practically squeak. “None of them were like you. No one is like you, Stewy.”

You’re not even lying, after having sex with Stewy for so long nothing compared. You had gotten accustomed to a man who knew what he was doing, to a man who was generous in bed. You had gotten used to a man who could make you cum. No one had achieved that after him. Your answer obviously pleases him, he grins and leans down to kiss you again.

He ends the kiss and stands up leaving you spread out on the bed, you whine underneath him, chasing for more. He ignores you and slips off his suit jacket. He makes a show of undoing the top button of his shirt and loosening his sleeves in order to push them up to his elbows. Fuck, he looks so good. You almost want to tell him, but you don;t need to. He can see the way you're watching him, that look in your eye. He knows what you look like when you’re turned on - and this is it. He grabs your thighs and pushes your dress up to your waist, getting a good look before sliding your panties down your legs, throwing them over his shoulder somewhere.

“I’m gonna fuck you like you deserve, baby. I know what you need. I can’t wait to taste you.” He rambles as you whimper in anticipation, he presses a kiss to your ankle as he watches you buck your hips.

He has his mouth on you before you can respond. Just as you remember, he is painfully and infuriatingly good at it. He still eats pussy like it's his second nature. He still looks up at you through his gorgeous lashes as he traces your clit with his tongue. He has to hold back from grinning against you as you writhe and whimper. He groans as you sigh his name and run your hand through his hair. You remember how much you love it when he’s like this, when he's animalistic and loses his composure.

Your legs tighten around his head as he digs his fingers into the flesh of your thighs. It’s fucking embarassing how quickly you barrel towards your climax, but it has been a while. And no one else devours you like this, no one else is this good. You should have expected it. He recognizes it immediately, breaking away from you for a second to speak.

“Are you gonna come for me, baby?”

“Yes! Please, Stew.” You moan, your hands grabbing at his hair attempting to push him back down. He smiles wickedly, licking his lips as he watches you.

“God, I love it when you beg for me.” He mumbles before diving back in, allowing you to push his head down and maneuver him.

"Please make me come," you groan, arching your back. “I'm so close, don’t stop.”

And he doesn’t stop, he continues to lap at you and work you though your orgasm as you come against his mouth. His beard delightfully scratches your sensitive skin, leaving behind a delicious burning feeling. He’s painfully hard now, after watching you come and hearing you moan his name. You begin to push at his head when you come down, usually he would tease you a little now, knowing how sensitive you are and make the most of it. But he’s so fucking desprate for you, he has been all night. He’s been dreaming about being inside of you for hours now.

He’s instantly on his feet, undoing his belt and undressing. You follow suit, weakly sitting up - doing the best your legs can do when they feel like jelly, you lift your dress over your head and throw it on the floor with his clothes. He’s climbing back on top of you, kissing you hungrily. His lips and chin are still wet with your juices and you moan into his mouth as you taste yourself on his lips.

“How do you want me?” You ask breathlessly, fully prepared to submit to him- to do whatever he asks.

“Fuck,” He groans at your words, having to pause for a second. “Can you turn over for me?”

You smile, leaning up to kiss him one more time before turning over and crawling to the middle of the bed, pushing yourself up onto your knees and holding yourself up on your elbows, so your back is deliciously arched the way you know he likes. You grin as you hear him groan behind you, his hand petting your ass before he delivers a light slap to it. He steps away from you and you hear the rustling of a condom wrapper, did he have that in his fucking pocket? His words from earlier repeat in your head, ‘I only came because I hoped you would be here.’

“Plese fuck me, Stewy.” You moan softly, knowing exactly what he wants to hear. “I need you.”

”How bad?” He teases. The head of his cock is ever so slightly pressing against your entrance, he’s hardly holding back as he waits for your answer, pushing in slightly.

“So bad,” You sigh, pushing back on him so he slips easily inside of you. You both moan loudly, you love that he’s so loud and shameless in bed. He stays still once he’s bottomed out.

“Yeah?” He says through gritted teeth.

“Yes! Please move. I need to be fucked properly, only you can do it.”

The sound he makes behind you is heavenly, you knew that would work. He pulls out of you before pushing back in slowly. He always does this, he starts slow and then builds up to a bruising pace. All you can do is whimper beneath him and beg for him to fuck you faster. Your pussy sucks him in greedily, his cock pushing against that spongy spot inside of you with every thrust.

“You take me so fucking well. Like you were fucking made for me.” His voice is deep and raw.

”I think I am,” You moan. “You feel so fucking good!”

“Are you gonna come for me again, sweetheart? Gonna soak my cock?”

All you can do is furiously nod your head and moan beneath him, the sounds of your pussy squelching as he fucks you is almost embarassing. You don’t have time to think about it because he’s pulling out of you and gently flipping you over onto your back. He lifts your legs and rests his knees on the bed, throwing your feet over his shoulders and he leans over you. He guides his cock back into you and dives down to kiss you, his tongue pushing past your lips in a messy kiss. You’re both moaning into each other's mouths, not minding when your teeth momentarily clack together.

“Come on gorgeous,” He groans, he’s breathless - pressing kisses to your face between his words. You can tell he’s close too. “Come for me. Squeeze my cock. Let me fucking have it.”

He feels you tighten around him as you come, his name leaving your lips like a fucking prayer. Your hands tightening around his neck, nails digging into his skin.

“Fuck, that’s it. You look so beautiful, baby.” He talks you through it, still fucking you as you come around him.

“Oh my god,” You moan. “Come inside of me, Stewy.”

You know he’s wearing a condom, but the dirty talk is hot. He thinks so too, because that's all it takes for him to come. His head is buried in your neck, his teeth biting into the soft skin under your ear. No doubt leaving a mark, but you’ll worry about that tomorrow. Right now all you can think about is how hot he sounds when he comes, you love that he isn’t quiet, that he isn’t afraid to groan your name into your neck.

He stays still for a second, lifting his head and kissing you - gently this time, before he pulls out. You rest for a minute while he discards the condom. You hear rustling and sniffing while he’s in the bathroom and you almost want to yell out to him - this is why we broke up. But you ignore it, getting up from the bed and breezing past him as he leaves the bathroom. You close the door behind you, taking the hotel robe off the back of the door and cleaning yourself up, doing what you need to do. You wonder if you should shower, but decide you should probably go back to your own room to do that.

When you leave the bathroom he’s sitting in the bed under the covers, the tv remote in his hand. Your dress and underwear have been picked up and folded on the chair beside the bed. It makes you smile, how can someone be so thoughtful but so selfish at the same time. That’s why you broke up, you need to keep reminding yourself.

“So, I guess I'm gonna go back to my own room.” You say as you gather your things. You’re on your way back to the bathroom with your clothes when he speaks up.

“Okay,” He says, respecting your decision. “Why?”

”Why?” You repeat, stopping your tracks. “Don’t you want me to go?”

”No. I want you to watch tv with me.”

”Seriously?” You laugh before you realize he’s being serious.

“Yeah, seriously.” His face is impassive, and hard to read. But you can’t resist those big brown eyes and you drop your clothes back onto the floor and slip into bed with him.

“Hey,” He whines as he looks at your dress. “I picked that up and folded it for you and you just threw it on the floor again.”

“Sorry, how rude of me.” You laugh at the mock pout on his face. You’ve sat pretty far away from him and he eyes the space between you.

“Come here.” He says lifting up his arm so you can cuddle into his side. God, you shouldn’t be doing this, you should have left. But he smells good and this bed is so comfortable.

“Will you stay the night here?” He asks quietly

”I shouldn’t.” You sigh.

“I know.” He agrees.

Of course you end up staying the night, Stewy is very convincing. With his promise of round two and a warm shower in the morning, it’s hard to resist. He also promises an expensive breakfast after the shower, but he says, ‘only if you behave yourself.’ You spend the whole night talking and laughing with him. Not only is he the best fuck you’ve ever had, he’s also the funniest person on earth. He’s got the kindest eyes you’ve ever seen but he’s also the biggest assole you’ve ever met. He’s so confusing, but that night you decide that maybe taking a little more time to try and figure him out won’t be so bad - only time will tell.

[squerlly]

flames of desire chapter 1: welcome to hell

-sfw/nsfw- Alastor x (f! bunny reader)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

your POV:

its so dark...why is it dark?, were am I? all I remember was running...running from someone until everything went dark. gasping for air I wake up my body aching like I just got hit by a bus, holding my head I look around seeing a red sky with a pentagram? and people no....creatures like people. looking down at my body I see my legs...they looked so different were they paws, my clothes were torn almost burned. standing up I walk around seeing the streets filled with people of all shaped and sizes, walking past a window I turn back looking at my reflection through the glass, I had ears...long ears, bunny ears, my skin was a light warm brown, my eyes were golden yellow and my hair was long a mixture of brown and white. feeling something fluffy I look back seeing a little tail wiggling it a little "iv officially lost my damn mind..." I say before turning around to continue walking before I run into something or someone... "Hay watch were your- going...woah babes you look like shit, ya new here?" looking up I see a person, a very...tall person, he had four arms and was Wearing a pink and white suit, his skin or fur? was as white as snow, hesitantly I nod "hmm usually I charge for favors but I'm feelin nice~ if ya don't gotta place to stay I know some were ya could go, if you want, follow me" as he walks down the street I follow not far behind "what's ya name babes?" "uhm...im y/n", "I'm angel dust remember the name~" he said with a wink as we walk up to this building with a big sign that said hazbin hotel, opening the door we walk in, the inside was not the...best condition but it was still nice, it had a bar with a couch and a Tv. a woman stormed over holding a spear, she had an X over her eye wearing red and black with pale grey skin and long hair "angel!!! were the hell have you been" she pointed the spear at him as he held his arms up "relax I was out doing some work when I stumbled across cotton tail here" cotton tail?, putting the spear down she looks at me "whos this?" "just a newbie I ran into on the way, thought Charlie could check her in" I waved a little awkward hi "I'm y/n" "hi I'm-" "Vaggieeee!!!!" a girl yelled from across the room, rushing over she spotted me "there you are I-" she gasps "hi I'm Charlie!!! I'm the owner of this hotel are you looking to join!?" she said excitingly as she shakes my hand "I would but I don't have any money-" "no need, you can stay here for free, this is a hotel for rehabilitating sinners!" "sinners?...what do you mean sinners, and what is this place?" "ya don't know? your in hell babes" hell? did I die- did he...kill me, so many thoughts were rolling through my head before Charlie snapped me out of my thoughts "well it seems that you already met angel dust and vaggie! but there's three more people you should meet, uhh vaggie were is Alastor and niffty?" "alastors in his radio tower and nifftys...doing niffty things, ill go get alastor" she said walking off before Charlie grabbed my hand dragging me to the bar "this is our bar and this is husk our bartender!" it was a cat like person with red wings grey fur and a beer bottle in his hand, he was wearing a red bow tie and a top hat, he gave me a quick glance "sup kid" before taking a chug at his bottle. vaggie soon came down with a man behind her. he was wearing a red pinstripe suit with black pants and red hair, he had deer ears and antlers? With a very unsettling smile across his face, "that's alastor he is our facility manager" he walk up to me to shake my hand "Alastor pleasure to be meeting you, quite a pleasure, and who might you be my dear?" something felt off about him I feel like running but yet I cant, "i-im y/n..." I said looking up at him, he was very tall and his hands were like claws, how can an animal such as a deer look so...terrifying. "quite a lovely name you have dear" he said, his smile seeming to get even wider, his voice was like that of an old radio....

chapter two is on its way, feel free to design your bunny how ever you like and stay tuned for future chapter

-squerlly

@pooplyface1423 @strippezzz

for more stories and chapters please click this masterlist

[molardeer]

9 year old me would be shatting her pants if she knew what i was drawing right now. hi billy

headcanons and tidbits about my hum!bill design below because im ill

- i wanted to kinda have a balance between alex’s one drawing of human bill and The Tumblr Design. as well as some of my personal design choices because i wanted it to be lore accurate but still visibly projected on by Meeee

- bills still only got one eye (hence the closed lid, he chooses not to have a prosthetic) and i gave my design of him polycoria so he has two fused pupils in one big eye. he still has long ass giraffe lashes

- ive seen a lot of human designs of him with a suit and jacket and i think thats really cool but i wanted mine to be a bit simpler n try something new so i gave it a caped coat thing. which i actually like a lot but i might experiment in the future shrugs

- pierced ear with teeth because he would methinks. im not disclosing whether its deer teeth or human teeth

- crooked gapped discolored + missing teeth because i think its fitting + an aspect of alex’s bill that i liked and a design choice i like in general sniles. his breath smells like beer and issues

- not skinny like the Tumblr human bill design, i wanted to emulate the triangle shape w/ his body type so hes a little bottom heavy at the torso (tho it might not be too noticeable w/ the coat) and has scrawny limbs. he gets to be a chubby old man as a treat also ive seen designs of him with pointed ears and i thought that was neat. just human enough to be human passing but still Questionably Inhuman

- his bow tie looks a little bit less like his canon design’s, i liked a ribbon-looking one better since its kinda a parallel with stans ribbon thing + i hc he got it from his mom and the hat from his dad

- i dont really know if i wanted the lighter streaks to be highlights or greasy hair i could see it being both or either tee bee aych. i hc that his hair gets a lot longer when hes in the theraprism + dwelling on the divorce, and i really wanna draw that at some point

- i dont really have a face claim for him atm but if i ever find one im passionate ill edit this and out it here. i think hes got pretty sharp cheekbones but theres some chub under his chin + hes got a pointy nose. yknow cus hes. pointy

- i got this hc from tiktok but i thought it was really interesting; his hands are really charred from the fires of his deals, + expanding on that hc i think hes got burns from the euclydia fire under his coat and gloves

thats about all the thoughts i have for now, thanks for reading !!!

[keirawantstocry]

hi hi its 💋anon yet again. Many soft kisses again, i legit started giggling so- twas amazing ty ty.

So Ive been having thoughts about how the general consesnsus is that Pac would silently move Tubbo to partner status. So like, Pac would be ecstatic, right? New partner Hell Yeah. I think Fit would catch on pretty quick and just double down. and i believe that Tubbo, while Not Really understanding whats Going on, would not say Anything. Why would he? then they might stop and while its confusing the affection is Nice alright?

Hope youre having a good day :>

oh 💋 anon, how i adore you. i hope YOU'RE having a good day :>

HIS ASS DOES NOT KNOW ITS A DATE 

“You're coming right?” Pac called to Tubbo who was currently slipping steel tipped boots on. 

“Yeah, I'm coming!” he called. Fit and Pac had invitéd him to dinner, it was kind of strange. But, he thought, surely they just wanted to talk and just happened to also be hungry. And they told him to wear a suit just because. 

They both looked him over when he finally stepped out, Fit with a low whistle and Pac with increasingly growing eyes. 

“You look sooooo good,” he said breathlessly and Tubbo flushed looking nervously over at Fit. 

“Haha uh thanks, man.” 

“So good,” Fit repeated and Tubbo burned under the heat of his gaze raking over his body. 

He just chucked to himself. They were surely pulling his leg. It's some kind of joke that they were checking him out like they truly wanted him, like he actually made their hearts race. 

Tubbo looked away. “Let's just go, yeah?” 

-

The restaurant was fancy, it made sense now why they had dressed up. Pac ordered wine for all of them and it came in tall thin glasses. As it was handed to him, Tubbo’s eyes went wide. He laughed softly. “It looks so fragile. I’m afraid I’m going to break it.” 

They both laughed. “Don’t worry,” Fit said. “If my metal hand can handle it without breaking it, I’m sure you can handle it as well.” 

Tubbo looked down at the menu and whistled. “This shit is expensive, I can't pay for this you guys.” 

They shushed him immediately. “We're paying,” Fit insisted.

“It's our treat,” Pac elaborated. 

Tubbo squirmed in his seat. “You guys don't have to do that.” 

“We insist,” Pac said. “You deserve it.” 

Tubbo squirmed under his gaze, remembering when Pac had said that same statement while kissing him silly. He still wasn't quite sure what was going on. How Pac claimed that Fit didn't care that they kissed. He didn't dare bring it up with Fit for fear of getting punched. 

He cleared his throat. “Okay then, let's eat yeah?” 

-

Dinner was delicious, he had to admit that. The wine was fruity and sweet, the meat was juicy and tender, and the talk was captivating. They talked for hours, long after their plates were clear and cleaned. Long after their drinks had been refilled again and again. As they got tipsy, then drunk and giggly. 

They went back to Fit's. Collapsed on his bed together. Pac cuddled as close to Tubbo as he could, fingers wandering all over his torso, legs locked around his. 

A real flush joined the wine drunk red on his face. “Feeling me up in front of your boyfriend? Wowwww.” 

Pac giggled, letting his hands wander even more. “He doesn't mind. Do you Fit?” 

Fit, who was currently standing, taking off the tie he was wearing, with a smile said, “No, I don't mind. With muscles like that I totally understand.” 

Tubbo giggled, drunkenly. “What the fuck,” he muttered. “Just. Let's sleep. I'm too tired to understand what is going on with you two.” 

Fit laid down beside them wrapping his arms around the both of them, and pulling a blanket up over them. “Yeah, let's sleep. Then we can all bitch about our hangovers in the morning, yeah?” 

“Yeah,” Tubbo and Pac muttered in unison before Tubbo felt himself being pulled down into the depths of sleep. 

[metfell]

Whats your favourite design quirk for each of cbench? I always love hearing how these things came to be !!

allow me to pull up some of my art for you and i will ramble- oh my god it has been literally so long since ive done colored artwork i am so sorry everyone wow the depression is visible i see. ANYWAYS.

so its funny trying to talk about designs when so much of how i draw them is just "this is ctommy but in a different outfit" so ill go into stuff that is always visible on them

i think my favorite consistency is ctubbos mismatched horns, its something that i think signifies it as My Tubbo Design. i saw a picture of a highland cow back in 2021 and i thought it fit him perfectly and ive never gone back ever since then. i started drawing tubbo as more butchy recently mainly because of boss and his source stuff to be perfectly honest, he has a lot going on in there. but its fun to take a character who is very often like... twink-ified? and make him into a stone dyke butch. well, idk if hes twink-ified these days, but back in 2021-2022 he sure was. i think giving tubbo a wider build- something these two images dont rlly do but whatever we'll work with it- is really great as a visual signifier for being guarded. hes a square hes got his massive snowchester coat on with its big furry coat and his hair covers his eyes and hes got a laurel wreath to signify coming home from war/being victorious in battle/etc. and he wasnt always a moobloom much like my little fic talked about, he used to be a human but the firework explosion fucked him up so bad the server had to stitch him back together with code from mobs. so the server grows a laurel on him and the server hardens him and tries to make him more resilient for the next fight.

i got insane abt tubbo let me move on to ranboo. i have so much fun drawing ranboo i really enjoy playing around with hair length and horn shape and leg anatomy etc. i used to be a fan of the straight split down the middle of their halves but i just love the mottled look so much i have to do that, mainly because i think it makes an artwork look a bit more polished for my own standards for myself. a lot of my ranboo design is an exercise in balance. his halves are black on the left white on the right, so his hair is flipped to make it more interesting, i give them the classic metfell hair flip because a)ranboolives hair moves like that already, and b)it lets me play around with giving them a little crown on the opposite sides horn. also i give them a bolo tie because i dont think cranboo can actually tie a regular tie if im being so forreal. and they have puffy sleeves because i think it adds to the fact that theyre not really a fighter like the others. though cranboo can hold their own and are a literal blacksmith constantly mining and smelting ores and making people armor sets, theyre not KNOWN for fighting, and so giving them an outfit that is not suited for fighting can reflect that.

when it comes to tommy i am always changing up how i draw him. im really attached to the long braid though, and im a classic butterfly clip ctommy enjoyer i think its fun and ppl who hated it were annoying as fuck. i think my favorite thing about drawing ctommy is that i give him gauges- very small ones but gauges nonetheless because cwilbur got them and he wanted to match early on. he never actually went through the process of stretching but he does have them in. and when i draw older ctommy i like to draw him like hes early on estrogen i think its really fun. same with tubbo i like to draw him like hes early on T. theyre transing together :]

[yourlocalghoulette]

this is Halloween

Miguel x fem!reader

warnings- 18+ MDNI, smut, unprotected piv, fingering, oral (fem!receiving), a bit of a costume kink, breeding kink, not proofread.

w/c: 1.1k YALL THIS IS THE LONGEST FIC IVE EVER WRITTEN

authors note- guys idk why this took me so long to write😭 my adhd rly said NOPE YOUR BRAIN IS NOT WRITING TODAY so it took me forever lmao. hope yall enjoy some spicy Miguel, reblogs always help!!

staring at your mirror, your mouth tugs up in a small, prideful grin at your costume. you are the sexy devil, wearing a red spandex tube top that tied in the front and a matching red miniskirt. your makeup is exaggerated but alluring, your lips painted bright red with lipstick. your hair is left down in loose curls, a headband with red horns holding them out of your face. your costume is perfect, but the only thing missing is….

you gasp as Miguel walks out of the bathroom, wearing a blood red suit and tie with a red top hat with horns on his head. the suit looks like it had been made just for him, fitting him in all the right places, accentuating his muscular build.

“good god,” you gasp, trying to take in his looks. “you look so good.” you grin up at him.

“so do you, muñeca,” he replies in his low voice that never ceases to send butterflies straight into your stomach.

“ready to go?”

Miguel holds his arm up so you can wrap your arm around his, making you giggle.

“lead the way, mi pequeña belleza,” he croons, following you to the front door. (my little beauty)

as you and Miguel step into your friends costume party, you feel all eyes falling on you and Miguel. ignoring the attention, you grab Miguel’s arm and tug it slightly.

“come on baby, let’s go eat. im starving.”

the night is full of fun, playing spooky games and carving pumpkins, plenty of cocktails and a costume competition. you and Miguel won best couples costume. as Miguel got more drunk throughout the night, you notice how he becomes more and more affectionate over you. he cannot keep his hands off of you, seeing you in that tight spandex top that squeezed your breasts together just right, showing enough cleavage to make his cock twitch. as you sit at a table together talking with a friend, you notice his hand start to snake up your inner thigh, making its way to your clothed cunt. you give him a look. “not right here,” you whisper. he looks into your eyes, his dark red eyes so full of lust and need that he thought he’d explode.

“im just- ahem- going to run to the bathroom real quick,” he says quickly, getting up from his seat. he beckons with his head for you to follow him. as soon as the bathroom door is locked, his lips are on yours, kissing you with such fervor that your knees grow weak. he pins you up against the wall, not breaking the suffocating kiss that he is planting on your lips. he makes quick work of unlacing the sides of your costume, ripping it off along with your flimsy white panties.

“god, such a pretty pussy,” he groans, kneeling down but keeping your hips planted to the wall. he licks a stripe up your folds, enjoying the little whimpers and mewls you make when he teases you. “fuck, so gorgeous for me, bebita,” he croons before taking your clit in his mouth, swirling his tongue around your sensitive bud. he enjoys how you quiver above him as he eats you out, back arching against the wall as you moan his name.

“please, baby- i need- i need…” you are unable to make a full sentence, your brain cloudy with the pure need for this man. “tell me what you need, princesa,” he groans into your pussy, sending vibrations through you that make your body shudder. “i-i need you-oh god,” you moan as he shoves two fingers inside of you. he nods in approval, then straightens up and unbuttons his red pants. he pulls his hard, throbbing cock out of his boxers, giving it a few solid pumps with his hand, giving himself more pleasure than you thought he would indulge in. “please, baby, I need you so bad,” you whimper as his mouth curls up in a devilish grin, enjoying the way your body writhes in impatience. finally, finally he lines up his tip with your throbbing hole and pushes himself all the way in brutally, not caring to let you adjust. you let out a silent scream, holding your hand over your mouth so the others won’t hear the way he’s fucking you. he pushes in and out of you mercilessly, always making sure that your cunt hit the patch of hair at the base of his dick before he pulls out again. he dives his head into the side of your neck, biting it until it bleeds then quickly using his tongue to soothe the pain. “such a good girl,” he moans into your ear, making the butterflies in your stomach start flying again. “oh-god,” you moan as his tip hits your cervix over and over and over. “I’m so close,” you manage to stutter out, your brain completely numb from the way he’s fucking you against the wall. “go ahead, cum for me, corazón,” he growls, fucking you faster as he chases his own climax. your eyes roll back as your vision turns white, hearing only static in your ears as your orgasm crashes over you like a tidal wave. you have to bite your hand to hold back a scream as Miguel somehow fucks you faster. “fuck, I’m gonna cum,” Miguel whimpers, his voice growing deeper. “Gonna plant a baby in you, huh, muñeca? Gonna make you a mami- fuck,” he moans deep in his throat as you feel his cock twitch inside you, your pussy milking him for all he has. he stays inside of you for a few more seconds, making sure it takes before pulling out and slowly stroking his length. “Jesus, you’re so pretty,” he coos as he watches you, your body still shuddering slightly as you pull your costume back on.

[iturnmomstransmasculine]

as long as ive got my suit and tie

[heroofshield]

Whumpcember Day 29- Paralyzed (Avengers, Clintasha)

@whumpcember

Warnings: covert poisoning, drinking/alcohol mention

The restaurant was busy but not overly so, the dinner rush not in full swing. It was one of those places that would require a reservation on weekends, but not have to worry about wait times during the weekday. The lighting was low enough to try and push a 'romantic' atmosphere but not bright enough where every little movement was glaringly obvious.

Natasha sat at what Clint like to joke was the 'mafia table,' where her back was to a wall so no one could overhear their conversation and had a clear line of sight of the dining room floor. Taking a sip of her wine, she spotted the familiar brown hair moving towards her.

"You clean up nice." Natasha smiled as Clint sat down across from her, dressed in a black suit and matching jacket.

"Yeah, well I had a lot of help from someone I'm seeing." Clint replied, feeling somewhat uncomfortable in the tailors pants and jacket.

"Oh?" Natasha asked a mischievous smile appearing and she leaned forwards slightly, propping her chin up with her hand. "Care to tell me more?"

"Not right now." Clint simply replied, focusing on the drinks list a bit more than usual. "Twelve dollars for a cocktail? Are they serious?"

"It's a slightly upscale restaurant, of course they're gonna up-charge the alcohol."

Clint just made a face and ordered a Negroni. Thanking the waiter once the drink arrived, he took a long drink-the bitterness mixing with the sweetness to remind Clint of the licorice he would eat as a kid.

Setting the glass down, he opened his mouth to ask Natasha who their targets was when he felt his throat start to swell. Coughing, he loosened his tie thinking he'd tied it to tight, but the feeling didn't go away. Dimly he was aware of Natasha asking if he was alright, and wanted to answer but couldn't get the words out. Then his body started to feel numb and he tried to move but couldn't-his body paralyzed.

Vision going black, Clint could hear silverware clattering and raised voices but it all blurred together.

--

Natasha heard movement and was instantly awake, opening her eyes to see Clint futzing around with his IV. "You're gonna pull the needle out and the nurses are going to be pissed." she said, pushing herself up from the slumped position she'd fallen asleep in.

"Well I feel fine now so I don't need it."

"Clint you were poisoned. It's gonna be awhile until you 'feel fine.'"

"Unintentionally poisoned. Although I guess it's my luck that someone else was the target and just happened to order a Negroni as well." Clint gave up on taking out the IV and leaned back in the medical bed. "How's that investigation going by the way?"

"Coulson got the security feed and Intel managed to figure out the guy." Natasha looked at her watch while continuing, "And they should be breaking down the door to his Bronx apartment as we speak. Although the restaurant got shut down. Apparently having someone try to poison the clients wasn't good for business."

She looked at Clint for a second, letting a soft smile appear. "I'm glad you're okay."

Clint looked at Natasha, his partner in more ways than one, and returned the smile. "Same here."

[darcyw16]

Yoongi’s Girl

Part 1

Warning: Crime, swearing, drugs, guns, smut mention (more smut in part 2 !), mafia

Your sitting at your dressing table in a world of your own carrying out you night time skin routine, girl gotta always look good. Your wedding ring catches you eyes as the light catches it, you smile to yourself remember just who put that ring on you finger, your knight in shining armour, the man of your dreams, your lover, your husband. Your sharp pulled out of your day dream when you hear shots fired. “ For fucks sake what now”, you give your self the once over whilst applying a tinted balm to your lips, and head out your room to were the gun shots were fired. You look over the staircase on the landing which looks over the main hall. You see 6 of your husbands men with their guns withdrawn all targeting the sleaze bag Mr Verrill. Jungkook clocks you giving you the side eye, you scoff to yourself, nothing can get passed that man. Your husband stands in front of his 6 men without a gun. “Damn Min why do you have to be so cocky in situations like this”. Your hear Verrill pleading for more cash, this is the man who has sold his wife to cover his debt previously. He is in his mid 50s with a growing gambling addiction, he's owes money to most lenders which we are using to our advantage. You see Verrill works in shipping firearms which he has some very loyal customers which we want, this is the only thing this man has along with his new taste is younger women which he obviously needs the cash to pay for, no women would that for free. You need to intervein before Yoongi sees red and blows his brains out, he hates people that beg, well that's lying as he makes me beg most nights but that's a different situation all together. You waltz down the stair case earning a smirk for Jimin, he knows what's coming. “Verrill how lovely to see you, you must be here to settle your debts” as you reach the bottom you weave through guys and stand in front of Yoongi with you back towards Verrill.  “Evening Miss Min” you whip you head round to glare at him “Its Mrs!” you turn back round to Yoongi fixing his tie. “Apologies Mrs Min, I'm hear to ask for an extension and also to extra cash, you see iv been giving a tip on a horse race tomorrow that will pay all my debts” i look up at yoongi and roll you eyes as i reach for his gun in his inside his suit jacket. “You see Verrill that's asking for two things, there will be no more lending until you pay up, i will give you another 24 hours to gather our funds. If you don't meet our agreement we will take goods to the value you owe like your firearms customers” you smirk up at Yoongi. “NO FUCKING WAY, they are my customers, do you know how long it has taking to get my customer base. Please I need  another $20,000 and I will pay you back tomorrow”. You sharply turn pointing the gun in Verrils direction “ I don't think you heard what i said,  there will be no more lending until you pay up do you understand.”, “Please I need to the cash, Yoongi please understand”. You point the gun and one of Verrills men and pull the trigger. “Fuck what did you do that for”. “Well that got your attention! There will be no more lending and if our money isn't not here tomorrow you will be lying there staining my marble floor like your friend and believe you me Mr Verrill I hate stains but not as much a lying basterd like you, Goodnight Mr Verrill. Namjoon can you see that Mr Verrill sees himself off the property”. Namjoon gives you the nod and you hear Jin say he will clean up the mess and dispose. You turn to Yoongi who has that devilish smirk plastered on his face, “ That was hot, I love when you take control like that, you make me so proud”, you scoff at him comment “ No you don't! I want to go bed and you would of had him pleading all night just to say no to him and shoot him dead if i hadn't stepped in”. He reaches out and pulls you in by your waist and whispers in you ear “Not true, i would of shot him with minutes as i have plans so get up the fucking stairs and wait for me like a good slut”. his voice sends shivers down your spine and the heat that has been pooling between you legs since you saw him this evening is starting to leak, you look at him “ Yes daddy” “Good girl we will carry on you performance upstairs”, you roll you eyes, i didn't do all this to create a scene or a “performance” as he called it, i did this for us i want to show him that I'm capable of handing things. I want to live up to my new name Min. “ if you want this to be such a performance I'm going to need an audience” you know you've touched a nerve when you hear a low growl “ Why don't you asks the guys to come up too, you know to watch the performance” he grabs your neck and pushes you against the wall, you love how his hand feels round your neck an he knows it. “ don't you dare say shit like that you know i hate thought of them hearing you scream, things like should just be for me but your so fucking loud”. Yoongi is the jealous type, iv lost count the number of people he has shot for just looking at you. You made the mistake one year for his birthday by hiring a female escort, he shot her for making you cum, such a shame she seemed like a really nice girl. But this why you love him, for once in you life you feel safe, wanted, loved. He saved you and provided you life and home you used to dream about. You didn't have the best start in life, you never met your dad and you honestly don't believe you mother knew who he was. She was drugged addict with many boyfriends, possibly even pimps. You were sold to yoongi to cover her debt, this situation should be the lowest point of anyone's life but I already rock bottom so the day i was handed over to yoongi that's when my life had finally become. You look up through you lashes, his eye piecing yours. You hold his hand that's wrapped round your neck to help you to pull up a kiss his soft lips, before he could swipe his tongue in to meet yours you pull away with his bottom lip between your teeth.

“ I'll be upstairs waiting daddy”

If you have got this for thank you so much for reading, this is my first piece of writing and already have part 2 in the works (which is very much for a smutty reader). Please forgive my spelling and grammer as i know its not the best, i kind of just doing this as a hobby rather than professional. I kind of have plan for this being a 2 part story, however i cant leave any of the members out so i may add extra parts so i give them all a bit of attention. XDX

[cyberphoenixsstuff]

A Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy(Part 1)

Vicky Jang just got an invitation from Giselle to her private evening fetish party,and she sure to be quite excited about it.

When Giselle come to IVE dorm to pick Vicky up,she was ride on a motorbike,she is wearing a full body tight latex suit,the helmet,the boot heel,make she look wild and sexy as hell

It makes Vicky stares as her for a while,before she could hop in Giselle's bike.

After a long ride,they finally arrive at Giselle's place.Vicky get off the vehicle quickly,she can't wait for the party anymore.

"Wow,Aeri unnie!why do you have to cut your hair that short?"Vicky held her cheeks with both hands and stared wide-eyed as Giselle took off her helmet.

"I got the cut for a while,honey, and i cut it often.The long hair you and everybody saw is because I wear a wig or hair extensions."-Giselle replied with a smile.

She hold one of Vicky's hand then lead her to the basement.It is a big waterpool,and next to the pool is the playroom.

"I am overflow with excitment already!" Vicky's thoughts

"Check this out,Wonyoung.A part of my...fetish collection" Giselle said,waves her hand at the wetsuits,and the loads of gasmasks,scuba tank,fins,snorkeling...

"Those suit made by rubber of PVC,right ?"Vicky replies with a smile,her eyes stare at the suit and gears,now she is feeling a bit awkward.

"Yup.But i prefer calling it latex.You feels interested already?Wanna try it out?"

"Sure,I am curious about it now.Never thought you are into that kind of fetish,Aeri unnie."

"Fine then.Which one do you want to try on,Wonyoung-chan?"

"I don't know...none of them look like it would fit me...you know how tall i am,and the mask is kind of small and hard to breathe..."Vicky said with a hesitates tone.

"Ahh...don't worry about it,honey.Once you try it,you will feel so good that you just want to do it over and over again"Giselle's smile haven't stop.

"Okay.I want that one"Vicky point at the suit.

"Excellent choice,hon!But you have to tie up your hair so it can fit to the hood"

"You don't say,unnie..."

Vicky didn't have any troubles to put on the tight latex suit that not even her size on,with Giselle helps.Now she is cover in shiny rubber from neck to toe and finger,it was so freaking tight,but Vicky feels quite comfortable.How weird is that.

"Well,i still look beautiful.What do you think,Aeri unnie?"

"Your body always look smoking hot,hon.Now it is even more sexy than ever!And you are very cute,too."(I am really turned on right now just by looking at her,I wonder...)

"Oh right,I have to put on the rest of the gears..."Vicky reached out for the air tank,slowly attached it to her back.

"This thing is so heavy,i can't keep my back straight!oh well...anyway,lets put on the flipper..."

"Don't forget about the hood and mask,Wonyoung-chan"

It took a while for them to neatly tied up Vicky's long hair so she can put the scuba hood on.Now she is putting the mask on her face.

"Let's see...I have to pull it up like this..'"

"Let me help you with the tubes...Alright,it connected to the mask,all good to go."

Vicky gropes all over her body,she breathes hard,enjoy this weird feeling of the latex rubbing all over her smooth skin.

"Why i am feeling really horny now?I haven't touch my cunt yet.Oh no, i feel wet already..."

"I know,right.I gonna gear up too,keep enjoy yourself,hon"

Giselle wasn't take to much time to change.The rubbery and zipper noises she make was quite sexy tho.Her suit is also tight and shiny,but the gear look a bit different tho.

"Your are wearing a gasmask,right unnie?"

"Yup.I look hot,do I?"

"I don't know...Your voice sound funny now and your breathe sound is...i don't know how to describe..."

"Your breath is like you just has a long run,Wonyoung-chan" Giselle giggles.

"I feel excited,horny,and maybe sweaty now.Can we start?"

"Of course.But first let's go underwater,hon.Ahh,what the hell,let's groping each other till we got climax"

"Finally!"

Giselle's hands is putting on Vicky's breasts,slowly caress them,then she squeezes them and gropes them more roughly.One of Vicky's hand reach out to Giselle's crotch and rub it.

"You have been a naughty girl,Wonyoung-chan...You are feeling it now,right?Your breath is even harder now...I bet your pussy is super wet already,hehe..."

"Oh yes...this suit...it felt like...a second skin,and the gears and stuff...i feel more and more sensitive...my mouth is dripping..."

"Oh my,how horny can you feel now?

Giselle's hand is touching and rubbing Vicky's crotch,she keep rubbing it harder and faster,make sure she feel it.

"Oh no...I'M CUMMING!"Vicky's body was shaking,her breaths become messy,she can't control her legs for a moment,so she holds on Giselle's shoulders.

"Feel greats,isn't it.I bet you love it already."

"I'm pretty sure...i was cum and piss myself at the same time...how is this thing feel so good?"

"I told you so...Wanna feel something else?"

Giselle go back to the suit and gears rack to pick up a vibrator,then she come to Vicky,now sitting on the floor,try catching her breaths after a nice orgasm,

"Turn it on and rub it on your pussy,hon.The rubbery and this magic ward will make sure you go crazy,hehehe..."

"But I want to take a break,Aeri unnie..."

"Oh Wonyoung,you have to do it non stop,if you rests for too long the heat will gone,then you won't feel so good any more...fine,let me do it for you."

Giselle does not wait for Vicky to reply.The vibrator rubbing on her crotch though the rubber,give Vicky the pleasure like no other.She is leaning to the back,her hand pushing to the floor,her legs is spreading wider,and her mouth can't stop making the sluty moaning sounds.

"Look at you,hon.Did you enjoy it that much?"

"Ahh..Ah...Oh..Ah..."Vicky keep moaning and staring at the ceiling.

Giselle reachs her hand to the van of the air tank behind Vicky and turn it off.

"(Let's see how long it will take for her to realize what is happening)"

It was only few seconds for Vicky to run out of air,and 1 minute for the mask to stick tighter to her face.

"What the...I can't breathe anymore!!!"

"How are you feeling now,Wonyoung-chan?"

"Aeri...I...cum..."

"You are doing it just fine,hon,keep going,i'm not going anywhere."

"Ahhh...ahh...cumming..."

Right in the time Vicky reaches climax,Giselle have turn the van back on.Vicky was breathing really hard like her life depend on it.

"I am pretty sure that was probably the strongest orgasm you ever had.Are you alright,hon?"

"That...was...insane...and...intense"Vicky still try to catches her breathe.And once she was recover,she said"I might get addicted to this"

"Good.Now it my turn to feel it"

Giselle stick the vibrator into her crotch and turn it on.She was rubbing it quite hard,while making a hentai ahegao face behind the mask.Her eyes rolled,her breaths harder and her knees is shaking.She is making weird but lewd moaning sound as if the vibrator were raping her.She was making Vicky confused.

"Turn off the van of my air tank for 30 seconds,hon"

"Okay"Vicky does it immediately.

"YES!CUMMING!".Giselle screams.She was squirting and pissing all over.This is the first time Vicky see some girl other than her reach climax like that.

When the van is turn back on,Giselle was lay down to her right side,breathing hard.

"I am satisfied already.But it you want to play some more..."

"No,it's okay,Aeri unnie.You should rest.Next time i hope we will do something even more kinky"

Vicky can't wait for the next time.

[ethernetmeep]

attended graduation. surprisingly cried less than i was anticipating, at least during the event. cried a bit afterwards, mix of realization & fear of not being able to get home safely. i did, luckily… my mother eventually came. wore a suit & tie, specifically the tie my friend gifted to me. heated up like a car in front of the sun. brought a drink since i knew if i didnt id maybe faint because of heat exhaustion. more likely nausea.

sat with an acquaintance, rambled to her. felt sick during most of the ceremony. almost puked, uh… three times. nerves hit like a brick wall. literally. nauseous because of nervousness. wanted to yell & holler but i dont have the voice for that. simple quiet ‘yay’ syllables had to suffice. brought sheldon & wiffle & chiquitito. gave chiquitito a bath before i left. got ready an hour or so early. sat outside & looked at birds in the meantime

in an ideal world i am very smart & funny & talented & talk to everyone & perfect. in an ideal world i dont get so worried my body physically shuts down. in an ideal world, i would be able to say something as simple as, “oh my gosh, i’m so happy for you! take care!” without bile festering. i try to live in this ideal world, try to be the best i can, but ive learned this is really really hard for me to do because frankly i am quite stupid. i know this is a haha funny joke 70% of the time but if i actually start gagging on nothing i know it’s probably a bad sign and i should stop overworking myself lest i actually do puke. it would not be very appealing to throw up in front of a plethora of my peers & their families. god…..

don’t even.. don’t.

[head in hands]

fine. FOR THE SAKE OF JOURNALISM! nothing else.

“I FUCKING— I HATE THEM. SO MUCH. I’M SORRY, I KNOW THATS MEAN—“

mother & other party member: “ITS NOT MEAN.”

[still reeling from remnants of stomach acid (as i did not eat anything in the morning when i took my meds which probably doesnt help this, although i didnt wanna eat then puke up whatever food it was i ate there either)] “I’M JUST— UGH! I’M SO FUCKING, I’M SO MAD.”

snippet of conversation. back seat with extra space just because. emotional & still nauseous. almost cry on the way home because of these weird things called human emotions, tears only well up; don’t actually fall. ramble to a man who knows a lot of people. miscellaneous conversations follow, like the one where i ask him if he can do anything about my favorite teacher being laid off. he says he’ll try. he…. how do i say this… knows… many individuals…. hes nice, slowly grown more used to his presence. i think if i cried with tears and snot long enough he’d be able to do many things, which is crazy & absurd but genuinely accurate. scarily accurate.

home, sitting outside & watching birds feed from the bird feeder. emptied it while i was gone. northern flicker, blue jay, blue-capped chickadee, common grackle, tufted titmouse… a wide variety. sprinkle some seeds on the ground for both squirrels & robins since they seem to not use the bird feeder much. robin right in front of me now, actually [was when i was typing this sentence]

i only made one note / doodle in my notebook during the event, but with words written & context applied its maybe better i don’t share it. saying…. heated words….. from a person that dislikes being rude unless someone is genuinely vile, is not as vague as one thinks they are. still, its pretty funny to imagine me being violent… slap thing was genuinely the first time i ever put my hands on someone like that

anyway, now theres three grackles near my bird feeder. two underneath. they’re so cute its almost upsetting, except its not. its quite nice to feel less alone

something something hi there something something oh hey i said everything now. i should probably lay down before my stomach gets worse

really happy i went, though. wouldn’t miss it for the world

[c0rpseductor]

what i like about suit and tie is that he says "as long as ive got my suit and tie imma leave it all on the floor tonight" but then immediately afterward talks about wearing the fucking suit again. like did you put your suit on, take it all off, and then put it back on again? make up your FUCKING MIND

[st5lker]

qnd as long as ive got my suit n tie

[otacon-kinnie]

as long as ive got my suit and tie

I'MA LEAVE IT ALL ON THE FLOOR TONIGHT

[tturing]

guys i told you my entire life on here probably at this point honestly isnt that insane like wowwww boundary issues i am so sorry. yes i am trying to fix it. sorry