#lol who even gives a fuck as if they would see this

[chobunz]

Hey :) I’m just now getting into enhypen, so tell me, what do you think they’re like in bed?

haiiii srry i took so long to complete this but nonetheless i hope you still like it !! i only did hyung line so i hope that’s okie </3 kinda went a little overboard and started yapping tew much in this one lol oopsies..

pair: hyung line ㅊ f!reader | warnings: smut, d/s dynamics, oral (m + f. rec), fingering, praise/degradation, c.ckwarming, p in v, a bunch of other nasty stuff i don’t feel like typing out lmfao

heeseung

don’t even get me started with this man omfg.. like he’s a literal sex god…

whether it be from his fingers, his mouth, or his dick he’s gonna make sure that you cum first always

will rip orgasm after orgasm out of you like it’s nothing, not stopping until you’re a whining, convulsing mess under him, smirking with utmost pride from how good he’s made you feel

he lowkey strikes me as someone with a high sex drive so i feel like the minimum rounds you’d be going on the daily is AT LEAST 3 (though sometimes that still isn’t enough for him), he not giving that pussy a break i fear..

feel like he’d also be very into body worship, just completely and utterly devoted to pleasing every inch of you, taking his sweet time to savor all of you as if it’s his last time he’ll ever get to fuck you— your body is a work of art to him so he’ll treat it as such !

is obsessed with marking you, like there’s just something about leaving hickies in places where only you two can see privately <3

loves fucking you in missionary so he can see your pretty, fucked out face— but is also a huge fan of doggie ‘cause he likes to spank your ass from time to time hehe

the way you feel around his cock, clamping around him with every thrust, has him moaning so much that he has to bite down on your shoulder to control himself ;(

will run slow circles at your clit with his thumb, other hand holding himself up to look at the way your face changes with pleasure

gets so horny for you and the way you repeat everything he says back to him as if you’re nothing but a dumb fuckdoll for him to use.. >~<

when he’s chasing his own high, his moans just get louder and louder, harmonizing with yours until he’s painting your insides with strings of white, quickly pulling out to watch his cum dripping out of you, admiring the beautiful mess he’s made of you ♡︎

jay

he’s the type of partner that would be sooo sweet and attentive and patient with you, like it doesn’t matter to him at all if you’re experienced or not; if anything he’d prefer to teach you new things !! (corruption kink goes craaazy)

he seems like he’d be more into passionate lovemaking rather than just pure fucking, just always treating you like the princess you deserve to be treated <3

loves the build up that leads up before you two actually get into it, like the heavy breathing in between slow, passionate kisses, pulling you in closer to him as you’re slowly grinding on him and the pauses to catch each other’s breaths just makes his brain short circuit 😣

is always telling you how pretty you look like while taking his cock, he’ll never ever get tired of the view of you on your knees for him as you’re sucking him off or while he’s fucking you in all kinds of different positions

i feel like he’s more soft dom leaning but i could also see him being a little mean sometimes, he knows how much you like it when he degrades you and tells you how much of a slut you are (only for him tho ofc)

is defff the type who talks you through it ><

pays close attention to your facial expressions and brushes your hair out of your face while kissing your lips every now and then, just needs to fill you up completely while he kisses you so gently in contrast to the hard and deep strokes he’s giving you. one hand on the side of your face, soothing you sweetly with each touch and the other hand playing with your tits

the way your walls flutter around him makes him feel dizzy, especially how you’re moaning as he fucks you nice and slow, praising you for taking it all so well. his good girl :(

would also be a big fan of cockwarming

idk why but i can just imagine you two chilling like that— you getting used to the feel of him inside of you while making out for a while, jay bringing his thumb down to rub your clit in slow, lazy circles

when you pull back to look at where you both connect together, you moan and he grabs your chin softly for you to look at him, finding your furrowed brows and fucked out expression so stinking cute !!

jake

THE BIGGEST WHORE OMG

like he’s such a freak but only when it comes to you, he’ll literally do anything you asked him to

in the beginning stages he would probs be a little shy at first, he’d be so gentle and delicate with you, kissing you sweetly as he inches himself slowly into you..

it’s like this for the first few times you slept together, taking his sweet time until you’d be able to take him with ease, and then the flip would switch— he’ll get a little more rough with you, calling you a dirty girl for him and how much you’re enjoying it

also strikes me as someone with a high libido, like he’s horny twenty four sevennnn, he’ll wanna fuck you any and everywhere

he hates condoms, he would literally rather die than to use one. is always begging to hit it raw each and everytime you guys fuck, he pinky promises that he’ll pull out !! (which only works about 60% of the time ..)

always always always wants to eat you out, he just can’t help himself he’s addicted to the way you taste, its like a drug to him. he’ll just randomly ask you out of nowhere if you wanna sit on his face and you allow him to do whatever his horny brain likes, plus with a face that pretty how could you not wanna ride it ???

this leads me to thinking about pussydrunk jake who’s so immersed in eating you out and fixated on your own pleasure, he could do it out for hours with absolutely no complaints on his end. it turns him on so much knowing how good he’s making you feel, he almost cums in his pants just from this alone..

i will say this time and time again, jake is very into recording during sex, he likes to record himself eating you out or fucking you, making sure the camera is super close up to capture all the little details; he’s built up quite the collection in his camera roll so far

is always so vocal in the videos, maybe even more than you tbh. he’d be asking you over and over if you like that and how bad you want his cock, he literally never shuts up. he gets a bit more intense when the cameras rolling, loving that you’re into it just as much as he is; you’re his little pornstar <3

sunghoon

i may be biased as hell but honestly i think he’s the biggest freak out of them all, like he’s the type who treats you like royalty when in public but in private ?? yeah, that’s a completely different story..

he just really really likes to fuck. morning sex, middle of the night sex, shower sex, phone sex, you name it. he’s literally down for everythinggg

feel like he’d also be very into corruption, slowly turning you into a sex obsessed freak just like him !! (twinsies)

will not give you what you want unless you beg for it. he likes when you use your words and tell him exactly what you need, if you want it that desperately then you’re gonna have to work for it, and you most certainly will

finds it endearing how much you squirm around and get all whiny as he’s fingering you, humiliating you when you can’t take it ‘cause how will you be able to take him if you can’t even take this small thing ??

he’d pitifully look at you as you’re stuffed full of his fingers, squeezing your cheeks together hard when you pout because you’ll take what he’s giving you and be grateful for it. idk it’s just very sexy— the contrast between his attitude when he’s training you in comparison to the real thing >_<

is a sucker for those cute innocent doe eyes you give him as you’re taking him down your throat, the sounds you make while choking around his thick cock, makes him so incredibly hard. he wants to use your mouth like a toy— his toy, until you’re a crying mess and feeds you with his cum <33

fucks.you.soooo.dumb

he eases into you ever so slowly, already too far gone as he feels warm walls hugging his cock, it has him moaning and throwing his head back in relief, and once he’s fully settled in, he will not be holding back

lots and lots of dirty talk !! will say the filthiest things to you in your ear all while pounding you from behind, you can barely even comprehend all of what he’s saying to you because of your fucked out state, all you can do is moan and repeat his name over and over in response

also loves it when you ride him, the way you’re bouncing on his cock and giving him the view of a lifetime, he’s never felt so desperate to cum before, groaning loudly as he feels you clench and unclench around him, milking him of all his cum

the aftercare is always so lovely and soft with him. he’d be acting like he didn’t just fuck you into a whole other dimension lol

idk, all i know is that i need hoon so badly.. y’all it ain’t even funny anymore :\

[kwoniele]

don't let them hear — choi subong

synopsis: lights off meant something a little different between you and the famous choi subong, also known as thanos.

genre: smut and fluff bc theyre js exes who want eo bad LOL. green flag choi subong... say WHAT 💜

warnings: afab reader, tease, fingering, nothing else honestly

author's note: this is the first time i have ever written on this account + since my social media detox so pls bear w me if this isnt exactly up to your standards ha ha ha... ily anyway not proofread! i wrote this when it was 3am leave me be.

"lights will be turned off in ten seconds."

in a moment, the lights will dim and the only thing shedding light in the room would be the giant pig dangling from the ceiling and choi subong's pale skin that's attached to yours. ever since he told you he would be joining you in bed tonight, you couldn't deny the fact you were thrilled. your drug-addict ex boyfriend shouldn't have excited you this much. let alone the fact you were waiting for him. 

"five, four, three, two, one." now, it was fully dark. 

you sighed in disappointment. you turned away from the side subong was and decided to sleep on your own. you knew you shouldn't have trusted him at all, yet you were gullible enough to believe he'd keep his promise. and he didn't. cause if he did, he would be beside you with his arms wrapped around your waist pulling you closer to him so that you could warm one another up.

"y/n?," your eyes abruptly opened, "are you still awake?" he actually did it. he actually kept his promise.

he actually came.

you decided to play the stubborn game and not answer. but you knew that he was aware you were definitely up. "don't want me here? okay señorita. i'll leave." his footsteps began to get quieter as he 'left'. you felt guilty and decided to let him explain himself. after all, it hasn't been long since that robot woman announced it was time for bed.

"fuck you." you turned toward him, expecting him to be halfway gone already. yet you met a choi subong sitting down with his arms trapping his knees while replicating footsteps that were leaving. "wow. double fuck you.'

"please, i know you want me here. so move over." he stood up and laid down beside you as his head automatically dug itself into your chest. "i don't give a fuck if you're going to go on some lecture about how i should have been here sooner, so don't waste your time." he pecked your collarbone before adjusting his position. "i'm here with you and that's what matters. okay?"

speechless is an understatement. you couldn't even be mad. you couldn't feel the slightest anger in you because he's right there. you could see his purple hair laying on your neck.

wait. something's wrong. something's missing.

"wait. choi subong. where's the necklace?" you used two fingers to tilt his head up so you could see his eyes. they're still as pretty as ever. fuck him for having such charming eyes. 

"gone. i threw it away when i saw you rave about how you were so much happier when you quit." he stared at you. waiting for you to say something. "what? do you want me to dig my hands into the toilet to retrieve it?"

"did you seriously… get rid of it? for me?" you sat up. tucking a strand of hair behind your ear before holding his hands. you noticed the tattoo he dedicated to you. the little heart with a sun next to it because he said that you were his ray of sunshine.

"of course i did. i meant it when i told you i'd fix myself as long as we crossed paths again, you know. i don't just make promises for the sake of—" shutting him up with your lips was probably your favourite thing to do. you missed this. you missed him. you missed feeling his lips perfectly match yours everytime you leaned in to him. 

"then i meant it when i told you i'd let you fuck me whenever, wherever. hopefully you take that damn opportunity now." he analysed your face before realising you were serious. he didn't even need to say anything. he just held your face by your jaw, kissing you rougher than earlier while gently laying you down on your bed.

he took off your pants and placed it just beside the bed, sliding your panties right after it. "fuck. how long have you been this wet, hm?" his middle finger glided itself from your cunt to your clit, using your slick as lubricant to teasingly insert his finger in your hole. "was it when i told you i quit? or when you kissed me? or better yet, since you saw me?"

"fuck, subong–" his free hand covered your mouth, preventing you from letting a noise out. 

"can you be quiet for me, baby? wouldn't want to let these jackasses know i'm fucking the prettiest girl here, would you?" you shook your head, agreeing that you should be dead silent. 

you didn't even notice that he snuck a second finger, fucking you with his fingers repeatedly until your were squirming and arching your back from the bed. "that's it, baby. do just that." his thumb flicked your clit, causing you to buck your hips on his hand. 

you don't know how he understood, but you mumbled against his hand that you were going to cum. his smirk was evident in the dark room which caused you to be pushed to the edge even more. "are you going to cum? hmm? is my baby finally going to cum for the love of her life?"

all you could do was nod. it was cute to him.

when you finally reached your release, he made sure to lick off all of your juice from his fingers. you watched him slowly suck on his ring finger while intensely staring at you. "i love you. don't leave ever again. i better be the only one you do this to."

"only for you, baby. just you and me. choi subong and future choi y/n. okay?

[love-byers]

st4 music coding: yearning and miscommunication (& lumax/byler parallel)

alright here we go

this will be long so strap in

(yes this is the post i've been hyping up for like 3 days lol)

there's a song that i noticed plays twice in season 4, in two very similar scenes, and a third that ill talk about later. the first is lucas looking at the hellfire club celebrate, and the second is will looking at mike and el skate ahead of him. i've drawn a few interesting parallels here that i think really strengthen byler endgame. please watch the video above in tandem with reading the post

first of all the obvious: lucas and will are both yearning to be with what/who they're looking at. lucas wanted to be there for the end of the campaign. he asked them to move it, not cancel it. he wanted to be there because he likes being in the club and he loves his friends. and we all know will byers is devastatingly in love with mike wheeler, so that speaks for itself. lucas and will are both feeling rejected, forgotten, unneeded, replaced. they are also both looking at their sibling taking their place. erica took lucas' place in hellfire, and el has taken will's place at mike's side. mike and el were attached at the hip the whole day, and that used to be mike and will. will knew mike long before el did, and before they started dating mike and will were a firm duo. mike and el were heavy on the PDA that day, but mike used to be affectionate towards will too, putting his arm around him, holding his hand, sticking close to him, laying his head on his chest, hugging him, etc etc. now mike can't even hug him. and there's a special sting about your sibling of all people replacing you, and seeing your friends (or crush in will's case) having a great time without you, with the better version of you, not needing you, not even thinking of you. and right there, ladies and gentleman, is where will and lucas are wrong. sure, the hellfire club were happy with erica and about the fact that they won, but they wanted lucas there. the whole reason mike and dustin were upset in the first place was because lucas was choosing the basketball team over them. they accepted that lucas had "gone to the dark side" and went on to find his replacement. they feel like lucas doesn't need them anymore, that he's replaced them with the jocks. and little do they know, that is not true. lucas misses them and yearns to be over there celebrating with them. and though it doesn't seem like it in that moment (lucas' point of view), they miss him and want him there too. they are miscommunicating. the same is going on with mike and will. will feels rejected, ignored, replaced. he thinks mike has basically forgotten he was there. he thinks mike couldn't give half a shit about him. he thinks mike doesn't need him. he will soon find out that that could not be farther from the truth. mike was HOT AND FUCKING BOTHERED. he felt rejected by will. he felt like will was purposefully pulling away. he felt ignored. he felt replaced by will's non-existent friends and maybe even a girl will liked. he felt like will didn't need him anymore, that will was doing great without him. he felt like he had lost will. he, like the hellfire club, accepted (or attempted to accept) that they weren't wanted or needed and leaned heavy into filling that void. (meanwhile lucas' replacement wasn't sufficing, and will didn't even have one). and little does mike know, that is all wrong. he missed will just as much as will missed him. he'd been watching will all day hoping will would talk to him. meanwhile will thinks mike has looked at him like...twice, and so does the audience, because we got will's pov first. this is why the rink o mania fight is so all over the place and dramatic, they're basically running smack dab into each other at full speed. they're both confused because the other suddenly cares about their relationship, and they're both hurt. they are miscommunicating. the hellfire club enjoyed having erica there, but she's not lucas. mike enjoyed hanging out with el, but she's just not will. meanwhile , lucas' replacement for hellfire wasn't sufficing, and will never tried to replace mike at all.

onto more specifc and visual parallels: lucas, el, will, and mike all fake smiles. i really want to stress el and mike, because not a lot of people realize that shot is about both of them. mike is faking a smile too. mike is upset too. mike is trying to appear happy and satisfied too. like y'all please cut my son some slack he was having a BAD DAY. his whole day was shitty too just have some empathy. if you really pay attention, you'll see that mike and el are doing the exact same things in tandem. mike sighs, el sighs. mike fakes a smile, el fakes a smile. mike's smile falls, el's smile falls. they're both trying to conform, trying to pass of lies as reality. "I try to laugh about it, cover it all up with lies... I try to laugh about it, hiding the tears in my eyes..."

now lastly: the scene of max listening to the radio call of the game. this falls right in line with the themes of the other scenes. she feels like lucas is doing great without her, like she's not needed. his life is just getting better and better and hers is getting worse. but she's got it all wrong too. she turns it off when the radio guy says "He must be feeling on top of the world right now". he was not. he was feeling shitty and missing his friends. he was missing max desperately, all the time. and he felt rejected by max, like she was steadily pulling away from him. and unlike the others where the distancing happens because of the miscommunication, max and lucas' happened because max distanced herself, and she was not there to see how lucas was really feeling, which was shitty. and yall already know im byler brainrotted as fuck so its extremely important to me that both times this track is used there is romance involved. in the ep 1 scene the song specifically trails into max's scene, roping her into this coding. mike and will are once again paralleled to a canon, requited, well written couple.

i don't really have any closing thoughts

actually here i have one: lucas and will parallels are the reason i wake up and breathe every day

and another actually

at this point to anyone who truly thinks mlvn are getting married:

and byler endgame but wbk

[msmk11]

okay so hear me out for an angst idea. remus x muggle reader. they’re dating and so in love and she doesn’t know he’s a wizard or werewolf yet. all of the sudden he shuts her out (cause he’s scared to tell them) and she’s stressing thinking he’s done w her and go from there where you please 😘

(also feel free to make gender neutral i just used she pronouns bc that’s what i use lol)

Magic Tricks

Remus Lupin x fem!reader

WC: 2k

CW: Angst; hurt/comfort; Remus doesn’t know how to communicate

A/n: thank you for the request lovely! I definitely tried to make it angsty, but I didn’t wanna prolong it cuz I know Remus would be trying to remedy the problem ASAP!! I hope you enjoy

The first day or so of silence you give him an out, figuring something is going on. But when he still doesn’t reach out after four days, a pit of dread begins to fill your stomach. This isn’t the first time something like this has happened to you. Not with Remus, obviously, but with other boyfriends. Disinterest was always the first step, and then silence, and then the inevitable “it’s not you, it’s me.” You just don’t understand what you could’ve done wrong. Things with Remus, at least you thought, were going well. Great, even. You were certain he was going to be the one you would marry. But now? Now you’re not so sure.

Instead of spending Friday night depressed and alone, you tag along after work to the company’s happy hour. You hope it’ll get your mind off your suddenly distant boyfriend and even help you loosen up.

You’re sitting at a table chatting with some girls from your department about one of their annoying neighbors when the restaurant door opens again and a chilly breeze blows through. You tighten your jacket as you look up at the brisk intrusion and falter There, getting seated by the hostess, is Remus. With another girl. 10,000 emotions are swirling through you, but the worst by far is shock.

Your shoulder is shaken, “hey, you okay?”

Your throat constricts in your chest and you’re not sure you can respond to your concerned coworker, “hmm?”

“You don’t look so good” another says.

“I- I’m sorry I just, I just saw my boyfriend, over there, and he’s with another girl.”

A plethora of protests and groans of disgust emit from your friends but you tune them all out. You’re hurt and confused, and before you know it, your legs have carried you over to where Remus and this redhead girl are sitting.

“Remus?”

You hate how hoarse your voice comes out, and your stomach twists in embarrassment.

The brunette’s head snaps up, eyes meeting yours and widening, “dove?”

Your eyes flit between the happy pair and you scoff, “funny seeing you here, sweetheart. I see now why I haven’t heard from you in days.”

The redhead chokes on her drink, cheeks turning a dark shade of crimson, “oh no! That’s not! We’re not!”

You glare at her and look back at Remus, arms crossed, “what the fuck, Remus? If you weren’t interested in me anymore you could’ve just said it. Instead, you’re going behind my back with other girls. That’s low.”

You turn around and begin to storm off, angry tears building in your eyes.

A warm, familiar hand grabs your wrist, stopping you, “dove, wait, no! It’s not what it looks like. I swear! Please give me a chance to explain. This is Lily! You remember her, right? I’ve talked about her before. She’s my friend from school.”

You stare at the love of your life disbelievingly, “seems like she’s more than just your friend.”

Remus shakes his head desperately, “no that’s not it. Please, let me talk. Just-“ his eyes flit around the room anxiously, aware of the many people watching the scene unfold, “can we go somewhere private to talk.”

“Now you wanna talk?” And damn it, a few tears start rolling down your cheeks, “Remus I haven’t heard from you in a week, and then I catch you with another girl. You have to know how it seems. Even if nothing happened, it doesn’t change the fact that you’ve ignored me, and made me feel worthless. I- I can’t be with someone who ghosts whenever they feel like it!”

“Baby, my love, please,” he pleads, his hands trembling.

“Remus, I’m done. I can’t,” you pull out of his grasp and stalk back over to your table, grabbing your purse and leaving in a hurry of embarrassed tears.

You’ve been bawling your eyes out on the couch for the last few hours, wallowing in your own self-pity. You can’t believe it. You and Remus are really over. The love of your life is gone. You’re not sure you can ever recover. Your phone has been buzzing like crazy- likely Remus- but you choose to ignore it. You can’t talk to him right now, not after everything that happened tonight.

A knock on the door interrupts your thoughts and you stand, wrapping a blanket around you and wiping the remnants of tears from your stained cheeks. When you open it you’re surprised, but not, to see Remus.

“What are you doing here?”

“Dove. I came here to see you…. to explain….everything. I didn’t get the chance at the bar, and you wouldn’t answer my texts or calls. So I’m standing here now, before you, to just give me one chance to make things right. Please, sweetheart, I’m begging you.”

You concentrate on him, eyes scanning his form. His brunette hair is tousled and messy, his clothes are disheveled, and he looks unbelievably tired and stressed. Even though you’re angry and upset, you love him still, and your heart tells you to fight for any possible chance there might be to save this relationship.

“Fine, come in.”

You turn around and stalk into the living room. Remus’ heavy footsteps fall into step behind you and he shuts the door, sealing off the cold night. You take up home on your gray couch again, finding comfort in it amongst the most uncomfortable situation of your life.

He looks at you awkwardly and ruffles his hair, “can I sit?”

You scootch over to give him room even though your body craves to be closer.

“So, what great excuse do you have for tonight? For ignoring me?”

Remus coughs and turns a shade paler, “uhm, right, okay. Uh- I,” he curses quietly, “sorry. I. Okay I’m just gonna say it. I’ve been ignoring you because I’m- I’m a wizard. And I was scared to tell you because I thought you’d run away and think I’m crazy and I love you so much and. Yeah.”

Disbelief. That’s the only emotion you feel. You scoff loudly and glare at him, “are you fucking kidding me, Remus? A wizard. That’s your excuse? And what great one do you have for Lily, huh? Let me guess, she’s a vampire.”

“Well no she’s a witch actually and-“

Remus freezes, realizing that doesn’t really matter because you aren’t being serious.

Tears threaten to spill from your eyes again and you stand up, wiping them away frustratedly, “Do you think I’m stupid, Lupin? Do you really discount my intelligence and dignity so much that you think you can use a bullshit excuse like that? I thought you’d at least grant me a mature conversation, but your behavior this past week should’ve warned me that wouldn’t be the case.”

“No, beautiful! I’m not lying, I would never, ever treat you so unkindly I- Well I know I’ve been unkind this week, but just let me show you.”

He fumbles in his dark brown coat and pulls out a long brown stick.

“Let me guess, that’s your wand. And where’s the broom?”

“I can’t afford one,” Remus says with a blush.

You only roll your eyes, “right then, let’s see you do a spell if you really are a wizard.”

He clears his throat nervously and nods. He flicks his ‘wand’ and a bouquet of red roses appears in his hand.

Your eyes widen and you’re impressed, but still not convinced. A flower- appearing-trick is an act you’re sure any skilled magician can pull off with some practice.

Remus extends them to you- “an apology. For being a right prick.”

A smile wavers on your face but you push it down and don’t accept his gift, “is that supposed to convince me, Remus? Any magician could do that.”

His hopeful gaze falters and he bites his lip, “right. Okay- okay hold on uh….Please don’t freak out.”

Remus stands up and moves to the middle of the room, and it’s not lost on you that you really feel like you’re attending a children’s magic show. He holds his hand with the wand to his head and taps twice and right before your eyes Remus slowly disappears into thin air.

Your heart quickens in your chest and you curl into the couch, “Remus! What the fuck?”

“Dove! I told you not to freak out.”

Something touches your arm and you scream, flinching away.

“Sorry, sorry, my love. It’s just me. I’m right in front of you.”

You tremble as your eyes dart around the room, brain not comprehending how you can hear but not see him.

“Baby, reach out slowly.”

You shake your head.

“Please,” he asks in a strained whisper.

With shaky hands you reluctantly reach out until your hands hit something. You flinch slightly, but when something warm wraps around your wrkdr you relax. Even when invisible you’d recognize that touch- the gentle, calloused skin of Remus’ hands.

“H-how? I- you- magic….”

Slowly Remus appears back in view and sits down, tentatively taking both of your hands into his. He almost sighs audibly when you don’t fight his touch.

“I’m happy to answer any questions you want, dove. Just, I want to know… do you still want me? Can you forgive me for lying and ignoring you? Do you think I’m a freak?”

You’re certainly dazed, but you’re awakened from your trance at those final words…. do you think I’m a freak?

Are you overwhelmed? Yes. Are you freaked out? Absolutely? Do you still not totally belive magic is real? For sure. Are you still mad at Remus? Yeah, maybe a little.

But do you think he’s a freak?

“Baby,” you sigh, eyes softening and hand moving to cup his face, “of course not. We… we certainly have a lot to talk about… both magical and communication based… but that doesn’t mean I love you any less. I’d love you less if you cheated or were a terrible person, or lied for a bad reason. But for being different than me… for being you, I could never, ever hate you. I don’t think you’re a freak baby. I love you, for all that you are. And I wish you would’ve trusted in me a little more.”

“I was just so scared to lose you,” he confesses hoarsely, his tired eyes dimming with sadness, “but I see I did that more by hiding than just telling you the truth.”

You hum and nod, running your thumb over his bony cheeks…

“Rem?”

He hums, brown eyes looking at you so softly you melt.

“I obviously have lots of other questions but first… Lily… you’re really not-“

“No! No! Dove, never. I love Lily, but she really is just a friend. She was actually lecturing me on the way to the pub tonight about how I was gonna mess things up with you if I didn’t get my act together.”

“Think I need to meet her formally…” you murmur amusedly, “we’d get along well…”

Remus chuckles fondly and carefully wraps you into his embrace.

You go nearly boneless.

“I really am sorry, my love,” he murmurs into your hair.

You inhale the scent of his sweater and the lingering smell of old books on his collar and sigh, “no more apologies, baby. Just promise me you’ll never do that again.”

Remus kisses your forehead gently, “never. But on that note, I should probably confess that I’m also a-“

[ghouly-boiiiii]

Coming back to Ghoulcy after a long break. Upon rewatching the show again, I honestly feel more strongly than ever that there's gonna be some canon Ghoulcy in the show at some point...

But I wanna clarify what I mean by that...

If that happens, obviously that's gonna create a bit of a love triangle between Lucy, Max and The Ghoul. And honestly, the triangle's probably gonna end up being pretty one-sided. Like I can't say whether I think Lucy will develop feelings for Cooper. But I definitely think its setting it up for Cooper to start having feelings for Lucy. And I think Lucy and Cooper might bang, just because Lucy is one horny lady with not a squeamish bone in her body lol.

Of course, that would definitely complicate things between her and Max even more than they already are. (You know, her dad being the one who blew up Max's home, the fact she offered to have him live in the vault with her but probably won't want to return after what she's learned, Max now being a knight, etc.) And who knows whether they will find each other and end up being together in the end, but...

Whatever the case, I don't think there's going to be a happily ever after for anybody. Not for Lucy and Max and definitely not for Lucy and Cooper. But it's certainly an opportunity for a lot of interesting drama and frankly, as someone who's been playing the Fallout games for 10+ years, I'd honestly be kinda disappointed if there wasn't some kind of human/ghoul relations going on. I mean, it's no more weird or ridiculous than any other absurd piece of lore in the Fallout universe. It's absolutely on brand 100%.

And if you think they won't do it just because they're worried about what people think... I would argue, they incinerated puppies in the beginning of the second episode... I don't think the show gives a shit about how anybody feels lol. The people making it are obviously passionate about the games and being true to the universe they're expanding upon. They've already fully embraced the dark and quirky elements and tone of the games. And they seem pretty cool with the Ghoulcy shippers too haha. So no, I don't think it's delulu to think there might be at least a little somethin' somethin' happening between Lucy and Cooper. Even if it's Cooper just pining hopelessly over her. Obviously, I could be very wrong. But I don't think I am. We'll see what happens, though. I'm sure I will still love the show even if it doesn't, but damn it would be fucking rad if it did lol.

[prettyboykatsuki]

oh gosh i agree so much with u on the intercrural part for isagi, had to search for the meaning as well lol

there are also others like him who are very careful (and they also find it so hot and dirty) : karasu, kunigami, sae, and chigiri who at the same time does not want a child

that was so hot thinking abt it ngl pls indulge more on this even if it's just isagi thank you very much

as much as i want the others like nagi, shidou, rin, aiku, etc. to like this, i fear some of them would just simply prefer p in v after minutes of intercrural, cough, aiku , cough, and nagi who become very impatient (and shidou i think does not mind a child lol)

jfjfdsfsdfkjsd i did not know it was such an unknown word it is in tags a lot on ao3 but yes intercrural = thigh fucking

i think there are probably several bluelock men who find it hot for different reasons. the only people i would switch is oliver and sae on these lists jkfsdkj. disregarding the risk of pregnancy in general tho bc i <3 birth control and contraceptives etc

i think oliver is like. a certifiable, tried-and-true FREAK. like in the traditional sexual way, that guy is really loose with sex and he likes to get into some freaky shit. i always say this but he sluts around for the love of the game, so while he definitely wants to be putting his dick somewhere

he can and does get very into thigh fucking because of the like,, teasing element. him and isagi are kind of the same in the sense they both do it so hard and so long - you end up desperately begging them to just fuck you already because of how frustrating it is and just how much they seem to like it.

isagi fucks your thighs less intentionally. he's just trying to get as much sexual contact as he can after his dick feels like it's going to implode. its usually after foreplay - when he's used his mouth for long enough that your thighs and pussy are embarassingly soaked and it feels especially nice for him to fuck through them. does it while laying behind you, very intimate - but very, very intense because he's basically grinding against your pussy. squishing your thighs together so much that that it feels like he's fucking through them. head against your shoulder, panting - precum covering your legs like he's just into It.

but you really, desperately want him to fuck you and he just. keeps saying to give him a little longer.

oliver does this one purpose but he likes doing it from above so he can see his dick reach through the other side when he does it. and he probably does it after fingering you like he's going to fuck you but then not going quite there. he just kind of... holds you. presses against you like you're going to get fucked and then... doesnt it. and it does feel good because he's using that same brutal, rough pace he does when he fucks you. the longer he does it, the wetter and slicker it gets the better it feels. so then, he keeps doing it because it feels good. he thinks its cute also, watching you go back and forth before finally caving bc you want him to Fuck you.

i think sae in general prefers giving u the most stimulation as much as he can if he's gonna have sex. he can be teasing if he wants to be, but overall - he likes to sitmulate you again and again and again and mess with your head that way. but he does all that so ultimately you'll be so wet it feels like you don't resist his cock at all. doubly bc i think his dick is Big.

this is too long to be talking about thighfucking. but ye dsjsdjk

[nowimjustastranger]

Hello.

I am the one who asked about doing a crossover between stcmo and "You Look Like Yourself ...".

I've written a fanfiction inspired by your AUs, it's called "A chance in a billion" if you'd like to read it.

Here's the link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/62071840

Still love your writing.

To avoid any confusion, this work is an AU of two of my AU's mashed together and is therefore not canon to StCMO or TASB lore!

Starting off by confirming that, considering Ford 419"3 gets to other dimensions via wormholes (which travel through both space and time), it is entirely plausible that Ford 419"3 could stumble across his significantly younger twin brother in the multiverse.

The very first paragraph just really sucker punches you, especially when it's obvious that Stan is coping with humor. It sets the tone perfectly and establishes Stan's character all within a few lines of inner dialogue. The next few paragraphs give a great look into how Stan wound up in the multiverse as well as Stan and Ford's dynamic, which is clearly strained.

The fact that Stan had a gut feeling about Ford 419"3 is a nice nod to the bond between Stans and Fords, who are bound together by the universe itself to maintain balance. And Stan just straight up ditching his current Ford to go investigate Ford 419"3 is hilarious because yeah, he absolutely would.

Ugh, how soft Ford 419"3 is with Stan is everything to me, indulging him in a scan just because Stan asked him to. Ford 419"3 is a paper man for Stans, no backbone to be seen lol. And the reveal! The way Ford 419"3 just fucking freezes, which of course Stan takes as a negative reaction. The poor bby. I love how Ford 419"3 is so effortlessly gentle even when he's having and internal crisis, catching Stan's wrist in an easily breakable hold- I gdhofxzdhzzhhdgcj I'm totally normal about it, clearly.

Not possessive Ford interrupting their heartfelt reunion, lmao. Love that shit. The immediate switch from sweet and soft to deadly and homicidal is near-instant for Ford 419"3. He's extremely proficient at both close and long range combat, having trained and altered his body to better accomplish his mission. I'd even argue that, between 419"3 Ford's combat experience, body enhancements, and his ability to see into the future, he's one of the most dangerous Fords in the multiverse.

Lee to the rescue! Lee is basically the human embodiment of a chill pill. Dude has calming Ford 419"3 down to an art form, lol. I love seeing their closeness from an outsider's perspective, especially in situations where you get to see that closeness. It doesn't get much better than Ford 419"3 abruptly shifting gears and scrambling to get Lee out of the danger zone when he fearlessly puts himself between two pissed off Fords.

I'm weirdly saddened by the fact that Stan has to announce himself to the Ford he's traveling with when he touches him (and is clearly worried about being hit), but that's probably because I'm so used to Lee and Ford 419"3, who would recognize each other's touch even half dead. I'm cackling about Stan being unceremoniously hauled away though, that's top tier comedy right there.

Lee taking the lead because the Fords are currently useless in their posturing is my Roman empire. Lee is smart and resourceful, able to navigate almost any situation you throw him in.

I theorize that the Ford's aren't speaking English because they're saying some vile shit to each other and don't want Stan and Lee to overhear, lmao.

The way Lee claps back to "Scarry" with "Kiddo" made me laugh, that's so him.

Pissy Ford is being pissy, surprise surprise. Way to stalk off without even using your own scanner to confirm that you are, in fact, leaving Stan with his twin and not just some random Ford. A+ big brothering right there. Smartest dumbass alive lol.

Best believe Ford 419"3 knows that Lee's gonna be insecure about his place in Ford's life now that he found his original brother. Lee is likely to distance himself with the intention of letting the two reconnect, trying to brace himself for (in his eyes) the inevitable separation between him and Ford 419"3. There's no reason to keep Lee around anymore after all, right? Wrong bro. So wrong. Ford's got two younger brothers now as far as he's concerned.

Everything about their interaction in the nest makes me so warm and fuzzy, Stan's finally getting the contact and care that he craves. I am a puddle, your honor. I eagerly look forward to more! I'll be re-reading this often, I can already tell. Thank you for writing this!!!

[cokoweee]

So… I always thought the first kiss would get me all giddy. Instead, I am heartbroken. I will elucidate (I don’t have enough spoons to get screenshots, so words will have to do.) I think Kendra was terrified out of her mind. She had to compartmentalize so much lately. I think what happened was, initially Big Mama gave her the deal over the phone in the bathroom, and then right before meeting Donnie in the gala gear was when she had the “eldritch horror” reminder. Thing is, Kendra has apparently been making some mental health positives since reforming, but when she is getting too stressed, she goes back to her vices. She started smoking again after getting stabbed by Bishop. And so here, in the Hidden City, being told to romance a guy, she isn’t even sure likes her back? (The ghosts said he “cared” but what if they mean like Casey and Draxum?) Time for some liquid courage and a LOT of it! Kendra is getting drunk off her rocker, because she knows she has to make a move before the end of the party. But it’s not fair to her, and honestly, it’s not fair to Donnie either. She would have liked to see their relationship develop naturally and if kisses come, then kisses come. But here, she has to drink, enough to get her inhibitions lowered, enough where she is fine forcing a kiss on one of the only supports she has left in the world. And here, Mr. Cirrhosis, himself is not only sober, but batting away her future drinks. She’ll never get shit faced drunk at this pace. Finally, she notices Donnie is getting in her space, trying to get her to leave. But she can’t leave! Who knows if this crazy spider lady is going to go after them?! She already has one psycho on her trail and he’s human (?). So Donnie is giving her grief, she notices him holding onto her shoulders. His outrageous height isn’t quite an obstacle now. He’s close enough to.. Yea, fuck it, guess we gotta go in! And… smooch And I’m just like… I feel so bad! I’m holding these two in my hands going “I’m so sorry! You two need a do-over on that kiss!” And what probably sucks is Donnie gonna chalk it up to her being drunk, and Kendra might think Donnie is gonna kick her out (or get distant again) Also I see you finally had her call him by his given name! just *keyboard smash*

Kiku back at it again with being 80% spot on. You lil pickle you are

You made me remember why I had Frida say her super edgy cringe ass line lol. It relates to this ahahah

My liking to Kendra is showing to much. I’m putting her through the blender. WHO KNOWS WHATLL HAPPEN THO HUH? WACKY KISS AFTERALL AAAHUU. Maybe they’ll get a redo maybe they won’t. (Acting like I didn’t already show them in the future with literal kids)

[blushingdread]

The thing about Cold that gets me the most is that Cold barely gives a fuck about any of the vessels, the only one he feels anything about is Fury, and he talks about how he hopes your actions put the Adversary's spark out. This man is a little asshole who doesn't care about anything. Anything but change

What does Cold hate the most? Boredom, endless nothingness, doing the same thing over and over again... which is sorta of what he is. Both in the sense that he's a part of the Long Quiet, God of all those things, but also because Cold is the most stagnant of all the voices. He's resistant to pain, emotions, changing, everything except boredom, really. The only time he's ever changed changed is in Molment of Clarity, where he's a lot more terse and seems annoyed the entire time

On top of that, Cold is the most comfortable and intuitive about your godly nature. Poping in at the Tower Fury fight when she calls you noting and he immediately is like "yes,". When going into oblivion, he says it feels like home. He seems to be kinda subconsciously aware of what you are in a way the other voices aren't

So, Cold. The voice that most embodies stagnation, being frozen in time if you will, that seems to grasp the true nature of TLQ the best absolutely hates boredom and is constantly seeking out change. He's constantly seeking out their other half, the Shifting Mound

I think that in the same Wild and Stanger are "a smaller version of me" and "a peek behind the curtain" to the Shifting Mound, Cold is like that to the Long Quiet. He is kinda like TLQ at its most basic, cold, and unmoving, constantly seeking the waves of change to crash upon him. Constantly seeking her, while she constantly seeks him, going around and around getting what their missing from each other

But thats not all!!

Cold talks like the Shifting Mound. They share similar thoughts on what exactly "the end of the world" means

They also feel similarly about all the horrible things that happen during the game

Cold doesn't care if what he's doing is good or bad, good or bad don't even register on his radar. The only thing that matters to him is new and interesting experiences

A perspective that's also surprisingly close to how the Shifitng Mound feels except she's affected by her emotions and about the other person in this lol

I don't really have an end point with this, I just think the Cold and Shifting Mound are neat

It's just. So !!!!!!! that the most Long Quiet nothingness voice is both super into their other half as her entire domain and not just a single vessel and sees the world in a parallel way

What if there was a part of me that was so much like you that loved you more than anything that seeked you out in everything??? What then

BTW, can you imagine Cold and Wild together? Cold being plugged into eveyrhing? Connected to the Princess in the most direct way possible. Change would be constantly happening around him because he'd be interconnected to her. He'd be able to feel it all, and maybe her powers would even push through his eternal apathy and make him feel something like Fury did, but even more

Would Wild like that? Like him? Having a rock to wrap around and anchor herself to? Cold doesn't really feel hate except for the Narrator, so him getting mad at her wouldn't knock them out of being connected to each other. Would she drop her sorta mind control that made the voices much more willing to go along with being one than they frankly would otherwise because of this trait of Colds? Would she find his apathetic temperament comforting and grounding, able to keep her from violently trashing from calm to agitated

Unsure, but it think they'd have an interesting dynamic

[thomaslittlegirl]

Hi love!

you could write something about Tommy where they are a bit possessive of the reader but a non-toxic sweet possessive type that is all the time saying 'my wife' every time he says her name he makes sure to say that she is his wife🥹 If you could put a little bit of jealousy where maybe someone sees her too much and he makes sure to move his hand down a little further than her back so they know she's definitely his wife🙂‍↕️

And the reader is SO proud to be his wife! She even leaves him a kiss on the tip of his nose and he turns red and tight because well it's Tommy '😤'

Sorry I have cramps these days and I just want something sweet🥺🥺♥️♥️Please take it only if you are comfortable, I send you love!🫂

ps. I love your work, you are amazing at this!🫶🏻

i hope your cramps go away! also hope you like this. sending you love back 🫶🏻🩷

his wife. thomas shelby

warnings; jealous thomas, michael wants u lol

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

everyone who knew you, knew that you were thomas's wife, because that's how he introduced you: "y/n, my wife."

on your finger lays a beautiful golden ring, a promise that you would soon become his property forever… it's not like you weren't already; you belong to shelby from the moment he laid his eyes on you and worked hard to conquer you. the ring was simply a promise to make it official.

you two were engaged, but he already presented you to everyone as his beautiful wife.

sometimes you even thought you might forget your own name since everyone called you "shelby's girl."

the gypsy was proud that everyone knew their place well. no man who wanted to keep his eyes spent more than five seconds looking at you, not if they truly valued their lives.

there were many bad men outside, many dangerous people who would not hesitate to hurt you to get to him... that's why he was always watching you, keeping you close where his eyes could see you.

everyone knew their places, except for someone: his damn cousin.

michael was centimeters from your body, making some jokes that he couldn't hear due to the distance in which he was from the two of you, but jokes that made you laugh out loud.

his hand clenched tightly around his glass of whiskey, watching the exchange of laughter between the two of you.

no one at the party had noticed his anger, except arthur. his brother looked at him seriously, giving him a nod, showing him that he also understood what was happening.

he thought it was enough.

thomas slammed the glass hard on the table and seriously addressed you, the music ringing in his ears with annoyance.

as soon as he reached you, his hand went to your hip. "doll." he said, squeezing the skin that your dress hid. "michael." he greeted his cousin too.

"cousin." gray greeted, making a grimace with his mouth that imitated a smile.

"is something wrong, love?" your sweet and naive voice reaches his ears and made his serious gaze finally detach from his relative and address you.

"no. just wanted to be close to my wife." he responded, smiling at you for a second before turning completely serious again and looking back at michael.

the youngest noticed how thomas's hand on your hip went down to your ass and stayed there, holding his palm firmly against you.

"you should go, michael." shelby spoke again. "gina was looking for you." his eyes and hard expression told gray everything he needed to understand, and the boy looked into his eyes for a moment before nodding.

"see you, mrs shelby." he murmured in a tone of voice that you couldn't understand but thomas did. he fucking did understand.

when you were both finally alone, you turned to look at thomas with a smile, totally naive and oblivious to everything that was happening.

his blue eyes looked at you fondly, with desire. you couldn't help but leave a small kiss on his nose, watching him smirk.

"my wife." your fiancé uttered, giving you a squeeze. "i can't wait for everyone to leave so i can have my doll all to myself."

[eva-does-its-best]

can you shut the fuck up youre making all trans guys look bad so fucking annoying. insane that u cant handle any fucking criticism whatsoever lol holy shit. whole ass fucking paragraph. gotta put that evil mean trans woman in her place right. god forbid someone gets frustrated at being consistently shit on by people in her community. im gonna be so real rn and say that as trans guys / tme people we have it so much easier its actually insane (coming from someone whos been thru corrective rape when i was 12 after i came out as a trans guy btw! theres my fucking pound of flesh. jesus.) not even rly trying to convince u but u just piss me the fuck off annoying as fuck

First off: So sorry about what happened to you, my most sincere condolences. It's the only thing I can really give, hope your life gives you enough peace and happyness to allow you to live with such an event.

Second:

You're making all trans guys look bad

I'm not a trans guy, I'm a transmasc, very different, a difference you should if not care about at least keep in mind if you want to respect less binary forms of masculinity. I don't speak as nor speak for trans guys, because I am not one, maybe if you actually read what I write you would know.

Insane that you can't handle any fucking criticism

Criticism where? Let me be absolutely blunt and sincere: All I see in the posts I replied to is tired, scared and hurt people who cope with said feelings by turning their vents into everyone else's problems.

I vent a fucking lot, everyone can see that, but when I vent I am sincere and point the source of my pain, how I feel, why I feel that way, and which people I believe reinforce it. What I don't do is go out of my way to involve people who have nothing to do with it or with how I feel.

Trust me I know how they feel, and the way they are dealing with it is incredibly self-destructive and I want nothing more than for them to get out of that shitty mental state that hurts them so they can feel better and have a slightly better life and emotional responses to the world.

Whole ass fucking paragraph

Yeah, that is how one transmits ideas. Shocking.

Gotta put that evil mean trans woman in her place right

I've replied to a couple posts so I don't know which one you're talking about, but I've no clue about the gender of the people who I replied to, I simply replied to shitty ideas, don't care who's behind them.

Pretty lame that you try to make this a gender war, don't you think?

God forbid someone gets frustrated at being consistently shit on by people in her community

"her" ok so this is you personally defending someone you know, I can tell.

Statement goes both ways don't you think? You think this is just for fun?? Yeah let's start a conflict that is affecting the lives of real people for fun!

We are fucking tired of the mockery, the disrespect, and the extreme policing of transmasc and trans men's language and experiences by people who have no say in them.

Do you care about that too or are you a hypocrite? Because when I reply to people's shit-ass posts I do in fact care about them otherwise I'd ignore em and let em keep hurting themselves.

"Oh but these ones attacked this person" I. Don't. Give. A. Fuck. There are shitheads everywhere, in every opinion and side of any conflict. There are gonna be shitheads who use this as an excuse to attack people of a certain particular gender they already had something against, it is irrelevant to the ideas exposed. Let's not act like there isn't a whole plethora of posts about killing transmasc please, you SHOULD care avout that too.

As transmascs/tme people we have it so much easier

You're free to have an opinion about your own experiences and I have no horse in that race. HOWEVER:

•You're not the only transmasc in the world and your opinion is very clearly not a universal truth, so don't you dare spit on everyone else's experiences by deciding what's true and what's not without counting with them.

• In your dumbass dychotomy of "tma/tme" transmasc are not the only ones put on the "tme" label and the same way I cannot talk about YOUR experiences you have no fucking right to talk about everyone else's experiences specially the ones from other identities and lives that you did not get to be or experience.

•Without dipping my toes in your opinion or your experiences I profoundly disagree with you.

• Lastly, WHO THE FUCK CARES WHO HAS IT WORSE?! WE'RE ALL FUCKING HURT AND BROKEN WE'RE LITERALLY KILLED IN THIS WORLD FOR JUST EXISTING, YOU WANT A COMPETITION??? GO FIGHT FOR TRANS PEOPLE'S RIGHTS TO COMPETE IN SPORTS INSTEAD OF CREATING OPRESSION OLYMPICS. GET YOUR COMFY ASS OUT OF YOUR INTERNET ARMCHAIR AND GO SEE WHAT'S GOING ON IN THE WORLD FFS.

There's my fucking pound of flesh. jesus.

Again so sorry you had to go through that, but you realize the whole point of this is to be able to have words for those specific forms of opression and awful events right?? To have experiences like that respected and treated with the seriousness they deserve right??? That is what we want.

You experienced transandrophobia, and the people you're defending right now don't want you to have a word for it, or allow only words picked by them as if they had any right to speak for you. Respect yourself more, man.

Not even rly trying to convince u but u just piss me the fuck off annoying as fuck

Hey at least you're honest, good. I don't give a fuck though, if you wanna keep hating me I have good news for you: I don't plan to ever shut the fuck up, enjoy.

The one person you hate is not me anyway, that is plain obvious... but that's a you thing to try and work on.

Sayonara dude👋🏻

[jitterbugjive]

i dunno if you get much of a right to call people rude when you are very intentionally super rude and trying to be purposefully offensive 75% of the time bruh

you literally implied sexuality is inappropriate for kids because it has the word sex in it. Would it have been fine if the person just said bi/pan and not the sexual part? Because bi/pan doesn't HAVE to be sexual, by your fucking dumbass argument. So is it a matter of "oh they just shouldn't say sex around kids?" what the fuck kind of point are you trying to make man I don't fucking understand any more

act rude, get rude prizes

don't be all

when you know damn fucking well you purposefully antagonize people for shits and giggles. You even @ ed the person who did absolutely fucking nothing wrong and put them on blast for all your fans to see and so they could see it too. Seriously, what did this random person do that was so bad you had to point them out and ridicule them to all your followers and probably absolutely ruin their whole fucking day? Why couldn't you censor their name and just make a funny haha rant about some non-identified person? If you had done that, I would have been like 'lol yeah he kinda has a point' but you dragged this specific person out in the spotlight to shit on them.

Be an ass all you want but when you're acting like a huge hypocrite and like you deserve respect when you're not really giving it? you look like a child.

At this point I feel like I'm only following you to be entertained by whatever next ridiculous completely pointless tirade over a minuscule non-issue you're gonna go on to piss more people off because you very clearly get off to it. but I'm starting to get tired.

I'm tired of you repeatedly saying you're gonna start avoiding drama and you just never do. and you're starting to actively hunt down and hurt people without giving a single shit about them. People who didn't need to be attacked in the first place.

Hi Tumblr user @avengedcelery I greatly appreciate you telling me who the comedian is in the clip I just finished watching but I don't remember asking what kind of people he enjoys putting his penis inside of.

We really are in a fucking deranged society, ain't we?

Like, this is normal.

This is going to be defended by people in the comments.

Broadcasting someone's sexuality out of fucking nowhere is absolutely commonplace. It's a casual thing to say. Everyone's gonna be on Celery's side here. I'm the bigot for thinking this is none of Celery's business and also not the business of the thousands of underaged teens on this site reading it.

No it's completely okay.

I'm the asshole for thinking maybe "This guy fucks EVERY GENDER! He puts his dick in EVERYTHING WITH A HOLE, BAYBEE" isn't something that needs to be said as an opening line, or fucking ever unless it's said by him.

[bixels]

I watched Starship Troopers tonight.

[chaoticlandworlder]

What is with the practically psychotic hate for Lance Stroll? I'm not even his fan- more indifferent- but the hate he gets is sickening. Like just see the recent 'Never have I ever' vid- so many top comments on youtube, instagram etc. are just spouting shit about him (attacking his looks, calling him window licker wtf etc.) based off the 'Never have I ever stood up someone question' (and of course they conveniently ignore all the other drivers that also said they have because it's trendy to hate on Stroll).

Of course, standing up someone sucks but first of all we have no context at all, and more importantly, it's clear the commenters don't actl give a shit about that because they're only hating on Stroll. This is literally just one instance of the way these F1 'fans' are so quick to seize any opportunity to put down Lance. Honestly, it's so off-putting, pathetic and sad.

[hirazuki]

Me, episode 1: Oh, a relatable protag! And a relatable female protag, at that. Sweet! That never happens.

Me, a few episodes in: Wait, the protag really is going to be my character? The one I identify with the most? Seriously? It's not going to be a strange, at least somewhat sinister, seemingly hostile male side character? It's gonna be a female character and the protagonist? That's insane, that literally never happens... what's the catch??

Me, more than halfway through the season: ... huh, I guess Maomao really is it. Okay, then ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Me to myself, after episodes 22/23:

[123pixieaod]

Inspired by this godly post which unlocked a part of my brain I didn't know existed, and solidly gave me complete and utterly brainrot until I wrote something

A thousand thanks to Lily for her wonderful help :))

"Does Kelly not mind you spending all your time with me?" Daniel asks, because she's Daniel and once she's thought something she can't keep her fucking mouth shut, even if she knows it's trouble.

Max looks up, pausing his set of weights, and blinks at her. Daniel feels her cheeks warm. One day, that mouth of yours will run you straight into trouble, young lady, her mum used to tell her, voice firm. Good girls know when to keep quiet. Daniel used to just laugh at the warning. Her laugh is loud and the opposite of quiet, but she used to know that everyone always loved her laugh.

"No," Max says after a beat and then continues lifting. Daniel hates the way her gaze tracks over him, lingering on the movement of his muscles, the ease with which he lifts the weight. Tawny hair brushed out of his eyes, cheeks dusted warm from the exertion. "Of course not."

"Why of course not?" Daniel asks. She wants to sew her mouth shut. This time, Max didn't look over as he answers.

"Kelly's very secure, she's not like other girls. And besides, she knows you."

It's strange. When Daniel was seven and Michelle eleven, they'd gone rock pool fishing. Michelle had been crouched over a shallow pool of water, her finger delicately brushing the tentacles of the anemone. Daniel had been scaling the rocks, wanting steeper, taller, more.

She'd found the shark first, nestled high at between the rocks, and for a beat she hadn't known what she was looking at. Just details, but nothing collective. Rotting smell. Shrivelled holes where eyes should be. Scales of silver lightning. Rubbery fish picked clean. The flash of bone, pearl white.

Then she realised what she was staring at, and screamed. Her father held her while her mother scolded her. I told you not to go climbing! It's too dangerous, Daniel. Why can't you just be good like your sister and stay by the shallow pools?

And then, later, ice cream. Her dad, beside her, explaining the horror away.

It's just nature, Dani. The waves wash them up, and they get stuck there. They can't get back to the sea, and then the sun dries them out.

They drown on air, Michelle helpfully pointed out, her feet kicking happily as she licked her 99. Daniel just just nodded, ice cream untouched. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw the sunken holes, the rotting flesh.

She hasn't thought about that moment for years, but suddenly it washes back over her. She feels simultaneously both. The child, staring at the carcass, frozen in shock. The shark, burning up in the sun, chocking on air.

"What does that mean?" She asks, and somehow her voice is normal, is fine. She's fine. She's not a girl or a shark. She's stupid and a fool and a gawky, ugly idiot, but she's fine.

Max manages to shrug, even with the 50kg weights. "You know. Just that Kelly knows you. She knows what you're like. And she knows me too, of course."

Daniel swallows. She nods. She hates everything about herself.

"That's sexist," she forces herself to say lightly because if the silence stretches anymore, Max might notice and set his weights down and look at her, and Daniel can't bear that. She doesn't want his eyes on her, taking in every blemish and imperfection. The boyish, ratty clothes she works out in and her curls gone frizzy with sweat and her inked skin, so different to Max and Kelly's pale, perfect complexions.

"What's sexist?"

"Saying she's not like other girls," Daniel tells him, setting down the weights she been doing. Instead, she goes to grab the skipping rope, just for something to do.

Max laughs. Daniel's glad she's turned away. Her cheeks are burning again.

"It's the truth. You, of course, Daniel, are not like other girls either." He says it lightly and ends with a chuckle, as if it's all just a joke. Daniel drags a sweaty hand over her cheeks. Burning, burning, burning.

Apparently, in Max's mind, she and Kelly are the same; both not like other girls. Kelly, with her faultless makeup and wonderful daughter and classy dresses and perfect feminity. One end of the scale. Daniel, the other. Barely even considered "a girl." Always one of the boys, only woman in f1 for a reason.

"Thanks," Daniel says. She wants to make it sound humorous, like she's in on the joke too. Instead, it's too cold; muttered as if she actually gave two shits about the conversation anyway. She has an F1 season to prepare for, she's too busy to care about stupid shit like this.

There's a beat of silence as Daniel stretches out the rope, feeling the plastic flex and give. Then, Max exhaling, the gentle bump of his weights against the floor, the workout bench shifting as his centre of gravity changes. Daniel keeps her back to him, ignoring it all.

"I did not mean it as insult," Max finally says, stubborn. Daniel forces a laugh, turning to give him a smile, all teeth.

"Of course not Maxy. I get that." Voice light and blithe. One of the boys.

She thinks he'll drop it, but instead, his frown only grows. Pinched brows, thin lips, cheeks growing blotchy. Blue eyes regard her, intense and unyielding. She burns from the inside out.

"I've upset you," he says, in that blunt, genuine way only he can do. Daniel barks out another laugh.

"Don't be stupid. You're not important enough to ever be able to get under my skin." She gives him another smile with only teeth. She feels insane. Her mother tells her good girls stay quiet.

"I'm sorry," he tries again, growing frustrated now, "I did not mean -"

"I told you, you didn't upset me," she drops the skipping rope without actually using it. "Anyway, I'm bored. Wanna get lunch now? Or are you still trying to pump those muscle with more testosterone?"

Max gives her one last, searching look before standing. They're almost the same height. She wants to shrink to nothing.

"That is not how testosterone works, Daniel," he says with the air of an overworked teacher. He looks at her with a smile, uncertain but genuine. She laughs, allowing him to move the conversation on.

She walks out of the gym first but holds the door for him. He grins, relieved. His fingers skim hers as he takes it and she lets go. A chill runs through her. Cold like scales, cold like ice cream untouched.

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