#lol this is old but I thought Id dust it off and post

[blood-and-cigars]

moar phantom au.

You didn’t ask for more of my literary analysis bullshit, but tough luck that’s what you’re getting. Gotta stay on brand, after all.

Ok so Phantom at its core (for me) is about the transcendence of artistry, of the sublime, into monstrosity. It’s about an unwitting Faustian bargain; the protagonist wishes to dabble in the music of the angels and instead finds herself tangled in the obsessions of a very human madman.

However, Phantom isn’t a traditional “escape the murderer” story, (It isn’t a traditional *anything* the original, serialized novel jumps genres like nobody’s business) it’s equal parts beauty and the beast, or rather its older cousin, death and the maiden. There is no book if after the initial disillusionment there isn’t still a draw.

The protagonist (Christine) expects divinity but instead is faced with this overwhelming tragic monstrosity, and amid the devastation of that realization she discovers… she’s still kind of into it?

You can strip away the dressings of theatre and opera and still keep that main premise.

Frankly I was always disappointed with Phantom’s lack of truly supernatural elements, I think a Hellsing AU would actually fit rather nicely.

However some alterations to Alucard’s character and role in the story would be necessary because the titular character is indeed the villain.

The same can be said for Integra too. While I love Christine as a protagonist, she’s inherently the wilting ingenue archetype (her strength is a quiet sort) and Integra is… not that.

Seras would actually be a more obvious choice for the Christine stand in, however I interpret Alucard as being… more decent?? than to form that kind of selfish obsession on someone without their being underlying baggage to their relationship (as is his history with the Hellsing line).

Ironically enough I think Alucard is too scrupulous to put all his tragedies and emotional burdens at someone else’s feet.

Either way, if not music, I’m not certain what their fixation would be. Most likely some form of occult knowledge? Or perhaps successfully running the organization itself.

I wonder how Alucard could deceive Integra though. Perhaps it’s the fact that upon her ascension she realizes that a vampire has been governing the Hellsing organization from the shadows for all those years since Van Helsing died. (Which if we’re swapping out the Opera House for Hellsing, could be a thing that happened)

I don’t know, there’s a lot of ways to go about mashing Phantom and Hellsing together.

Lovecraft + Phantom of the Opera + House of Leaves+ Hellsing = I have no idea what I’m doing anymore.

Here’s some stuff I’d include in a fic:

Arthur lives until Integra is twenty, all that time he is in charge of the organization. Although he is always withdrawn, a little sickly, and white around the eyes.

The catacombs of the opera house can be the Hellsing manor subbasements. Alucard has been locked away for three long decades. The years are incomprehensible at this point, stretching out into something quite close to an eternity.

No he’s never been released from his cell since then, but the many years of silence and solitude have made him powerful in a different way.

He is part of the basements, the mansion, the organization itself. The walls breathe with him, not a soul passes the threshold without his notice. To some extent, he’s forgotten what it is to be a person, instead of simply an extension of the shadows.

Arthur is very secretive about his duties, even as his health declines and it becomes clear they must begin thinking of succession. He mutters about demons, of monsters, and hellfire.

There is a room, on the ground floor, nestled away to the side, with the best view of the gardens. No one is allowed there. This is our box five.

The drapes are tightly drawn, but from a few cracks Integra’s been able to make out a desk and old, worn journals.

Every two weeks, Walter may go in for twenty minutes exactly, to clean without disturbing anything. Only Walter, no other staff.

When Integra asked, he told her it was once Van Helsing’s study. It is where he kept all his arcane knowledge, where he wrote out his correspondences, where he was found dead one early morning. But that was decades ago.

Arthur himself never sets foot in the place. Integra wonders if it’s out of grief. He talks about his father often, with both disdain and reverence.

During the last year, Richard comes to live with them. To be with his brother, he says. To look after his niece. He’d execute his attempted coup a tad more gracefully; after all why kill your opponent when instead you can discredit her?

When she was younger, Integra caught her reflection grinning back at her. She told her father about it, asked him why the deepest recesses of the mansion drum like a beating heart.

Arthur’s smile froze on his face. After a moment he told her, in the forced cheerful tone one uses with children, that there were spirits watching over the house, watching over them.

“Like angels?” Little Integra had said.

And her father nodded indulgently, even as he called Walter in to have every mirror on the property covered.

She is not so naive, by the time Arthur dies. Even through her grief, she sees how Richard is making himself oh so comfortable at the manor. How his smile is sickly sweet, and the way he’s trying to set himself up as her “protector.”

During the viewing, Integra stares at her father’s cold, still body and it’s like the breath’s been stolen from her lungs. She does not weep, but she is empty.

She’s not sure she cares to challenge Richard’s silly games. Let him have the organization and it’s haunted legacy.

Integra dreams she is walking along a beach. Icy water laps at her ankles with each step. There’s a figure amidst the rocks, playing a violin. And when he looks up, he wears her father’s face but his eyes are unfamiliar.

“What are you doing here, little bird?”

“I’d ask you the same thing,” she said. “Who are you?“

“I’m no one.”

She does not remember the rest of that dream.

Richard laughs when Walter explains about the study to him. First when it’s presented as his dead brother’s wishes, then even more so when Walter claims a supernatural bent to the precaution.

However, Integra is the heir, and it is her house. She will not see her father’s wishes disrespected before he’s even cold in the ground— no matter how eccentric those wishes may be.

She gives the study key to Walter and instructs him to continue as before.

Integra is looking over the old ledgers, the first time she hears the voice. No that’s a lie. She’s heard it before, this is the first time she acknowledges it.

Her father had been rather free with government funding, it seems he didn’t see much of a distinction between business and pleasure. (She shudders at the thought of an audit) At least he had been meticulous about recording his expenses.

She goes through years of accounts, and very suddenly the extravagant spending stops. Somehow Walter’s modest budgeting is so much worse.

She’s brushing away silent tears when she hears it. The voice is muted and distant, hardly discernible. She decides to follow it.

Hellsing manor has always been a strange place, where shadows flicker in the periphery and invisible hands claw at the windows.

Integra knows this. She’s been taught to ignore it.

She isn’t sure what compels her— recklessness or grief or anger but she follows the voice, down two flights of stairs and closed off staff quarters, to the forgotten basement door that leads into an even deeper section of the mansion.

There’s a strange indescribable shift, as she senses a consciousness focus on her. Something old and long slumbering, shaking off layers of dust and disuse.

Her father had told her the basement was walled off, that the door was sealed. Bricked shut, never to be opened again

It stands ajar, inviting her inside.

Any other day, Integra thinks she would have turned back. But this time she trails down into the bowels of her home.

Somehow— she thinks there is a trick involved, a few passages did not lead where they should have— she reaches a room that she just knows is a perfect mirror of Van Helsing’s study, even if she never set foot in the place herself.

On some level she knows it probably isn’t real. But she’s determined to figure out what this thing is that slumbers beneath the manor. She’ll indulge these games to see what’s behind it all.

There is someone waiting for her. Maybe something. It’s just a silhouette, with ever shifting edges. Blurred movements, darkness barely given form.

“What are you?” she asks this time. And she knows somehow, this is the man from the dream. This is the voice she’s heard from the shadows.

He doesn’t respond. Just looks at her. When she nears him he seems to reform. To take shape into something more resembling a person. But she realizes she can’t make out a face. Any face at all.

[kidflashimpulse]

Any yj fanfic recs, it doesn’t have to be just Bart or zetaflash. It can be anything! I’m just trying not to think about the cancellation lmao

im glad im answering this now instead of when I first saw it cause all this time I thought u were asking about fics in general and ive been trying to come up with some since and WHEW I have zero idea on where to start id be at it for hours. 

apologies for only replying now, ik this might've been more helpful in the moment but I was hoping my post on YJ status was somewhat helpful on the matter ! still imma give some reccs in case u need it in the future

though warning... I get the impression its entirely possible (very likely) u might have read them all already? im gonna try my best with variety but I can't promise u haven't read it already

for YJ, I have to confess....... I have tunnel vision for bart, I don't recall reading much outside/beyond him and those that I have, well since I don't archive what I read (one of my worst traits if u ask me), its not coming to me rn, but next time I read smn I wanna recc Im gonna try to remember to add it to this post as an edit lol

but for now...

Sunshine. Falling by @/radioactive-earthshine 

ok...so ik im gonna mostly be giving the stuff that ive bookmarked on ao3 (which isn't at all a comprehensive list, theres sooo much more that ive loved but I don't use my acc to read at all so I usually just free-ball it when trying to remember fics, and yes, its a habit I very much hate lol) and in fact, I wish I could mention them all here but I would be writing a novel if I spoke about each and every one of the so ur best bet is to just check that list out honestly 

and also, yeah its not a YJ fic, but I enjoy how it follows his comic characters run and builds on it. I find his characterisation in this fic rlly interesting and authentic (also Max being Native American there is everything, I actually have this whole theory/HC in YJ that Max is a Native American “God” (like the ancient greek/roman gods) i.e commonly known as Mercury, that just kinda roams about but is mostly in New Genesis (no idea where that thread/post is rn but I read someone connecting Lightray to Hermes/Mercury and since then that idea has been stuck in my head lol)) 

okay I have gone totally off track (im so sorry omg) im gonna try to keep it concise from here lol, anyway supper recc sunshine falling, the writing is gorgeous and the plot is rlly interesting! 

After the fall of Olympus by @/greycappedjester  

okay, im obsessed with this series, the world building is INSANE, the first fic in the series is basically a YJA AU where failsafe actually happened (whole flashfam except jay dies, but YJA bart still makes it to that TL cause he actually ended up dimension hopping rather than time travelling, or smn like that). To keep it short, his characterisation here is AMAZING, I love it sm, the second fic, flash facts is one of my all time favourites (if u ask me its the only canon take of his interaction with the rogues, cause don't get me started on how foul his comics history with them is (and not in a gd way)) so personally, this series, particularly flash facts, is just fantastic. it also very much explores other YJ/DC characters, (Dick is the central figure in AFTO and bart appears relatively later on and when the YJ Invasion plot passes, the plot focuses alot on other characters, especially considering its largely about Dicks evolution).

For zetaflash, I mean it quite literally when I say I think ive read almost all the fics under the tag... we are very much at that stage in the fandom, so yeah lol, quite a few of my faves are in my bookmarks but I haven't updated it in a while

Sooner than later, a Wally and bart oneshot on their YJ bond, its quite sweet, ft spitfire

Waking up to Ash and Dust  its incomplete (just one chapter) and quite an old fic, its also been super long since I last read it so I can't remember it clearly, gotta give it a reread but I remember it being a rlly interesting take on things so it stuck with me, basically an outsider POV of bart with OCs 

ill try to update this list when I can! and my bookmarks at some point too whilst im at it lol, hope u can enjoy these (if u haven't read them already lol) and im so sorry for the totally unwarranted random essay lmfao

[irresponsibility101]

hi hello it’s me and i would like it stated for the record that this is entirely the fault of @spacerocksarethebestrocks who put these comments on my post about korto vos and the rest of the idiots time travelling and now i have thoughts.

[i’ll put the image id under the cut, because they’re not vital to understanding the concept, just knowing what sparked the attention lol]

so i was thinking about this already, but the comments gave me more ideas, so now i’m just kind of thinking that quinlan and korto time travel. it’s around rotj where they’re from, korto is probably around 22, making quinlan about 60, and they go back to probably the middle of the clone wars, so about twenty four years, give or take. they’re on a battlefield for some reason. aayla is there, because of course she is, this is a fix-it au and i said so. quinlan is old as fuck however he still kicks ass and korto is significantly younger and has been kicking ass since before he was old enough to understand what kicking ass was so the battle gets done pretty quickly. aayla just looks at quinlan and goes ‘wow you look like shit, and who the fuck is the child.’ quinlan is having a mild mental breakdown but that isn’t going to stop him from being a shithead so he probably goes ‘yeah i couldn’t keep up with my skincare routine while on the run from the sith empire trying to kill me xoxo’ or something similarly snarky. blah blah blah, boring timeline stuff, but what is important is that quinlan does in fact become to korto what kris jenner is to kim every single time he does something cool. young quinlan, who we shall call quin for this purpose, fucking hates it because ‘what the fuck i’m so lame in twenty years—‘ whilst convinently ignoring the fact that no, he’s been like that the entire time.

tell me that quinlan wasn’t aayla’s biggest fan. try it. i dare you. you’re wrong.

anyway, on the topic of aayla, she looks at korto and adopts him. what’s that? no attachments? sorry this is my brother now, now shh, i must teach him how to pull off leather crop tops and blow shit up. he already knows how to do both of those things, but shh don’t tell her.

they go off to see obi-wan and anakin at some point, and this is where the thick plottens. quinlan is being a petty bastard to anakin and delights in following obi-wan around, telling him the bullshit things that his lineage got into. korto, at some point, randomly mentions how luke is his boyfriend. quinlan did not, at any point, try to mask the names of the lineage members. they put two and two together and get five, and just assume that quinlan became deadly allergic to skywalkers because his son is dating one, instead of realising that quinlan is talking about luke the same way he does about bly (and for the same reason), ie insulting him constantly but actually liking him.

there’s also another option for this part, which is that luke time travelled as well but they only figured it out when korto dropped onto him. like, literally. he got pushed off a building and landed directly on top of luke. korto goes ‘hey guys!! look!! it’s my boyfriend luke skywalker!! i got pushed off a building and landed on him!! how convenient for the plot!!’ while quin has a crisis over his son’s boyfriend being the kid of anakin skywalker of all people, anakin is having a crisis over having a son older than him, ahsoka is still very confused because nobody explained this yet, aayla and obi-wan are deeply amused, and quinlan just goes ‘oh god it’s you again’ very dramatically. this is when the deathly allergic to any and all skywalkers realisation takes place. weirdly enough, luke ALSO comes to that conclusion because he isn’t well versed in quinlan’s bullshit like the rest of them.

bonus points if quinlan and/or korto just drop the most random and horrifying details ever about the future, such as ‘the life expectancy for force sensitives is 30’, ‘wow alderaan looks nice when it isn’t space dust’ and ‘yeah the clones tried killing you. don’t know why.’

even more bonus points if at any point where quin and commander fox interact, korto is there. watching. side-eying them both. sending messages to quinlan mocking him ruthlessly. he decides that he’s going to treat quin like he’s his brother instead of a younger version of his dad and so he just... locks them in a room together. he also gets fox a glock and an alibi for the mysterious death of chancellor palpatine, killed by an unknown gunman, but that’s totally unrelated.

on another totally unrelated note, sure is fun to know how fox is one of the best snipers in the GAR.

tldr: quinlan time travels, thoroughly embarrasses his son and his past self (who he also treats like his son, which is weird for all involved) and, through the pettiest ways possible, makes everyone think that he’s allergic to skywalkers because his son is dating one.

[image id: two screenshots of the tumblr comments section, taken on mobile. both of the comments are by spacerocksarethebestrocks. the first reads: Consider: Korto and Quinlan travel back in time and together.

Featuring, ultimate embarrassing cheerleader Dad 60 year old Quinlan Vos, who runs around after his early 20s sun shouting 'IM SO PROUD OF YOU SWEETIE' everytime Korto does something cool.

Past Quinlan Vos hates it, because he is such a lame fucking Dad. That is not how he imagined it. He was going to be a Cool Dad, and he didn't expect to be a Dad at all.

Aayla loves Korto. That's her little bro.

the second is multiple comments, which read: Korto was raised on stories of Aayla being awesome and he is just like: stars in his eyes OMG how amazing you're a queen I'm so glad we're related.

Old Quinlan also delights in telling young Obi-Wan about his disaster lineage. He actually loves Luke, he's Korto's boyfriend and Quin thinks he's adorable, but like fuck is he going to admit that to Obi-Wan. He maybe grudgingly admits that Ahsoka is doing pretty okay and is out there being awesome, but not like too awesome.

and:

And he keeps tripping up Anakin but won't tell anyone why. Just does the most petty shit. Korto is so embarrassed but like fuck is he going to explain to anyone why his dad is doing that.

/end id]

[lilydalexf]

Old School X is a project interviewing X-Files fanfic authors who were posting fic during the original run of the show. New interviews are posted every Tuesday.

Interview with Tabula Rasa

Tabula Rasa has 8 stories at Gossamer, but there are even more X-Files fics at AO3 and her website. She writes Mulder and Scully in a very lovely way. I've recced 3 of my favorites of her fics here before: Bird in Snow, Fall: East on M St, and Skuamorph. Big thanks to Tabula Rasa for doing this interview.

Does it surprise you that people are still interested in reading your X-Files fanfics and others that were posted during the original run of the show (1993-2002)?

I'm always extremely pleasantly surprised to get kudos (or, very rarely, a comment) on my old fic, but I'm always happy to see it! I did post them all (I think) to AO3. I'm not surprised people are still reading fic, though. It's an iconic show and now with streaming, it's really easy to watch older shows and natural to want fic about them!

What do you think of when you think about your X-Files fandom experience? What did you take away from it?

XF was my first fandom, definitely my first online fandom, and so it will always have a special place in my heart. Also... I had a great time! I stumbled upon and joined the Scullyfic email list by accident, but it was the best thing I could have done. I learned a lot about how to be a writer and how to be in fandom, and those lessons are still important to me. Foundational. Also, in terms of modern fandom drama, XF was more low-key on the drama (although it didn't seem like it at the time!). But I learned something that's always served me well: find like-minded people, and hang out with them. Don't worry about the rest.

Also... you can't control the show, but you kind of can control the canon.

Because of Scully, I ended up taking a forensic anthropology class in university-- and now I have a Master's in a forensic science! Part of the Scully Effect, and proud of it!

Social media didn't really exist during the show's original run. How were you most involved with the X-Files online (atxc, message board, email mailing list, etc.)?

Definitely mostly email list! I never really got the hang of message boards. Posting fic was exhausting, and tbh I never figured out how to work Ephemeral. I checked it every day, though! I loved, after a new episode, everyone sending in their thoughts and reading everyone's experiences together. Fandom was a lot more work back then, tbh!

What did you take away from your experience with X-Files fic or with the fandom in general?

That fic can be just as good, or better, than traditionally published works. There are works of XF fic that have stuck with me for years now, far more than some books I've read. That fan writers can know the characters better than the show writers. The fandom in general was really smart, and mostly more adult than me (I joined fandom when I went away to college, so I always felt at the younger end of the scale. That was good though!).

Also, my first time reading and writing porn. Not gonna lie, I was shocked the first time I accidentally read smut. But I adjusted fast. lol

What was it that got you hooked on the X-Files as a show?

I was still a kid (now we would say preteen) when the show premiered- I think in middle school. But I was already into ghosts, aliens, monsters, solving mysteries, and I'd already imprinted on the dynamic thanks to Square One (really)! I was also just old enough to start developing celebrity crushes. Hilariously, I did not twig to the fact that I'm bisexual the entire time I was in XF fandom, despite having enormous crushes on BOTH Mulder and Scully. Ahhhh!

Also, my whole family was into the show, but I was definitely the one with the hyperfixation. I used to take notes and record the episodes as I watched. It just had the right stuff and hit at the right time. And I've always been obsessive.

What got you involved with X-Files fanfic?

As a kid I also really liked Star Trek, and someone had given my dad a book about the history of Star Trek, which I read. This included mentions of fandom and fanfic. As soon as I had a private-- and perhaps more importantly fast-- internet connection (in college), I went looking for XF fanfic, and that was that. Hooked immediately. Also I shipped them A LOT so that's what I went looking for.

What is your relationship like now to X-Files fandom?

I tend to not go back to a fandom once I have a new fandom, so I wouldn't say I'm in it. I did hang around the edges for the revival, of course, because I wanted to experience that with the same people, but since the revival was mostly not that great (with a few exceptions), I didn't get pulled back into it. But I still think of the people I knew in the fandom a lot, and always hope they're doing well.

Were you involved with any fandoms after the X-Files? If so, what was it like compared to X-Files?

I've never left fandom, and I've been in a BUNCH: Harry Potter, Doctor Who, Bandom, Supernatural, now CQL/The Untamed and other Chinese-media fandoms, with many smaller ones in between or on the side. I feel like at their core fandoms tend to be similar, although where you host the fandom makes a big difference: Livejournal, tumblr, twitter. I think that because fandoms now tend to be bigger and more diverse (which is good) there tends to be more wank (which is bad). In some of them I was close to a group of people, some of them not. Honestly the best thing is when someone you know from an old fandom is in your new fandom. It's so much fun. I have really good friends thanks to fandom, and I've had them for YEARS. Like. 15 years.

Who are some of your favorite fictional characters? Why?

I tend to focus more on ships than characters, but some of my all-time favs: Scully, Hermione, Sirius Black, Castiel, Lan Wangji, Xie Lian. That's just fandom-oriented ones, otherwise we'd be here all day. :D

Do you ever still watch The X-Files or think about Mulder and Scully?

I don't often rewatch episodes any more, although if I come across an ep on tv I might. I definitely still think about them though! For example, I'm a teacher now, and just a couple weeks ago one of my colleagues mentioned he'd heard the students saying they shipped two of their classmates, and he was like "Ship? I don't get it" and I was like "HOO BOY, do I have a story for you!" And I explained how shipping came from XF fandom, and why. That was fun. I definitely still think about Mulder and Scully too-- I mean, they're cultural touchstones, so they do come up sometimes in greater pop culture. Also, I was in Hannibal fandom for a while, and Gillian Anderson is still The Best.

Do you ever still read X-Files fic? Fic in another fandom?

I haven't read XF fic in years, even the ones I remember as being really significant/important to me. I still have my all-time favs saved on an external HD though! Fic in another fandom- every day lol.

Do you have any favorite X-Files fanfic stories or authors?

Blinded by White Light by DashaK has stuck with me. Mr. and Mrs. Smith and the Ruby-Throated Warbler by I forget I'm so sorry -- that's lasted as my ideal post-canon MSR and as an interesting and different way to tell a story.  [Lilydale note: It’s by rah.] I was always thrilled to see fic by Brandon, JET, MaybeAmanda, Syntax6... and, frankly, everyone on the Scullyfic/ Emuse list. So many talented people in that fandom!

What is your favorite of your own fics, X-Files and/or otherwise?

Things Outside, which is the only thing I've ever written based on a dream, and I'm really satisfied with it. It was hard to write but so much fun to revel in the weirdness. I always kind of wanted to write more because I know a lot more about the situation, but otoh, I like the open, ambiguous ending (usually I am very HEA).

In other fandoms, King & Country in bandom (MCR) and in Supernatural I'm very proud of Hope and Clay. I struggle to write casefics even though I love to read them, but that one really worked out.

Do you think you'll ever write another X-Files story? Or dust off and post an oldie that for whatever reason never made it online?

I don't think I'll ever write something new. There is an old fic that may be done but it was smut so I was too shy to post it at the time. In theory if I find it and it's decent, I could post it!

Do you still write fic now? Or other creative work?

I do! I write fic very slowly, but I do write still! I have a million ideas for stories, but I'm so slow at the actual writing part.

Where do you get ideas for stories?

I usually take a jumping-off point from canon, or of course, something I need to fix or expand on. Or sometimes I start telling myself a story as I fall asleep and the idea grabs me long enough I can manage to write it.

What's the story behind your pen name?

I was getting into fandom and realized people didn't use their real names. I flipped through my history book looking for inspiration, and decided tabula rasa was a great name for a writer. I tend to add an X because it's rare to get "tabularasa" as a username, and the X is indeed for X-Files (so I'm something like tabulaxrasa most places). I usually go by Tabula Rasa or Tab, though. And I still use it because 1) it IS a great name for a writer; and 2) it's not fandom-specific so I can keep it in every fandom.

I identify with it so much I have answered to this name in class (oops). I have a "Tab" t-shirt (as in the soda, but I have worn it to Comic-Con for ease of ID-- better than a nametag!). And my mom got me a necklace with a "tab" typewriter key as a charm, which I adore. Yes, I have accidental merch of myself.

Do your friends and family know about your fic and, if so, what have been their reactions?

As you can tell from the above, my family knows (my family being my parents and sister). They are supportive! I think my mom read a couple stories? But obviously she has to know the fandom to get it... I got my sister into fic, and we even wrote a couple fics together (in Gundam Wing). She's a lot more selective about fandoms, but she's joined fandoms on her own, too. She's just not in one constantly, like me. :p

I tend not to tell not-online friends unless I have felt them out and know they're super fannish, or they bring it up first.

Is there a place online (tumblr, twitter, AO3, etc.) where people can find you and/or your stories now?

Most of my old fic is now on AO3 and I hang out on twitter a lot, @tabula_x_rasa

Is there anything else you'd like to share with fans of X-Files fic?

I'm really glad people are still in this fandom! It will always be so important to me. Thank you Lilydale, for this nostalgia trip!

(Posted by Lilydale on March 30, 2021)

[pro-bee]

While we’re on the subject of “Family First” (lol were we?), watching it now for the first time since “She”/”Daughters”/Season 17, with part of the pain dulled knowing that the ship was righted, as it were, and that everyone is now safe and sound and together at last--

What is really striking, when you unpack the unbearable grief of it all, is just how palpable Tony’s love of Ziva is throughout the whole episode. 

From the moment in the previous episode that they figure out that Ziva is on Jacob Scott’s hit list, to the last scene in FF where Tony makes his exit forever, you see just how unbreakable that bond is.

At this point in the series, he hasn’t talked to Ziva in almost three years, has had no indication from her that she wants any contact, has ostensibly tried to “move on” for his own sake (even though it took him actual years to get to that point). But the second he realizes Ziva is in danger, he’s vaulted right back into her orbit. The guy who’s gone to the ends of the earth for her (twice) rears his head, and nothing is going to get in his way. It doesn’t matter that he hasn’t heard from her in years, could believe she wants nothing to do with him, could be protected by people closer to home. When he knows she might be in trouble, he’s the wild card.

[cut because this got waaaaay long]

And it’s even more revealing, because this isn’t like season 10, where they had a rift over Adam, but were still forced to be together and deal with their shit, as ugly as it was. So even if he was angry with her, it was still easy to tell Parsons that Ziva was his best friend and he would protect her at all costs, even when she hurt him. By season 13, they really may as well have been on different planets. We know he loved her, loves her, will always love her, but he’d resigned himself to the fact that she was gone and wasn’t coming back, and he was going to have to figure out a way to live without her. He wasn’t happy about it, and wasn’t doing a good job about it because even when he tried dating again, it was obvious how goddamn lonely he was. He didn’t make sense without her. And while he was trying his best to grow as a person and help himself heal, which was admirable, he was on his way to living with a wounded heart for the rest of his life. 

But then they see her name on that screen, and it’s like no time has passed, and they’re back on a mission to save her from the boogeyman yet again. Then Trent Kort comes in and pushes all the right buttons with the “girlfriend” crack, because he knows them, too, and again, it’s like we’ve been launched back into season 9-10, even without her physically there. 

It’s everything. From the way he goes after Kort in the bullpen (and no one tries to stop him) when he thinks he’s willfully putting Ziva’s life in danger (I mean, good call, Tony), to the way the pin drops at the end of “Dead Letter” when he sees the news about the fire at her farmhouse on TV and you see his vision tunnelling. From the way he says, “If that’s Ziva, I’ve gotta go” like nothing else exists in that moment, to the way Gibbs is already ahead of them and pushing him to go, and McGee already has his plane ticket ready for him because they know there isn’t a force in the world that’s going to stop Tony from going after Ziva. How he’s antsy at the apartment, packing for a trip that must feel way too familiar like he’s been thrown back three years, but can’t shake the feeling that she’s still out there, somewhere, because she always is. And when McGee and Abby break the news to him that she’s gone, his whole world shatters. And not in the big, dramatic breakdown (which comes next), but in the absolute shock that takes over his body that his worst nightmare is coming true.

Of course, there’s the “All hands on deck” scene, which wrecked us all, and is still probably one of the best moments of acting of Michael Weatherly’s career. (I go back and forth of my favourite moment of his being that scene or the orchard scene in PPF.) It’s not just the visceral pain of it all, the anger and the anguish. It’s that it’s so, so raw and primordial. Tony is running on pure id, all emotion and no rational thought at that moment. He’s drowning and he doesn’t want to come up; he wants to go down and be swallowed whole. You can see the absolute fear all over his face and in his whole body. This is his worst nightmare, has always been his worst nightmare since she came into his life. Somewhere you have to think that in the last three years, part of him has always worried that something would happen to her and he wouldn’t be there to help, or even worse, wouldn’t know about it until it was too late, and that has finally come to pass.

Tony isn’t a guy who loses control very often; he acts like a playboy or a class clown, but even that is often an act to hide who he really is. He keeps his emotions tightly wound, which is why the brief flashes we get occasionally (for instance, when he calls Ziva out on Adam) hit so hard, because he doesn’t usually get his feelings get the best of him, good or bad. But this scene throws that all out the window; Ziva is the one thing that makes him lose control, makes him follow his heart instead of lock it up tight. And the idea that she is gone forever unleashes every one of those feelings he’s repressed his entire life into the abyss. 

It’s in the way he slams his fists on his desk because he hurts and it’s in his warpath. it’s the way his eyes are absolutely wild like they’ve never been, unfocused and unhinged. It’s the way he will yell at anyone in the vicinity because every ounce of pain is begging to escape from his chest. It’s the way his voice hitches when he gets brought back down to earth, because the anguish constantly wrestles with the anger. And this time, I noticed that once Senior shows up and tells him to come home to catch his bearings, just for one night, he subtly shakes his head, almost like a child, because he cannot, absolutely cannot, believe what he is hearing. And going home, alone, is only going to bring it home that this is very, very real. It’s masterful. (Makes me wish MW had gotten more meat like this during his tenure on the show, because boy, can he bring it, when given the chance.)

Then, of course, there’s the Tali reveal, which is a while other post -- it’s bullshit and we all know it, but it happened and all’s well that ends well, now -- and again, we get all these subtle glimpses into their relationship, even through other people. The way nobody doubts that if Ziva had a daughter it could be anyone’s but Tony’s, because, of course they would have a baby. And it may be three years, but Tony knows Ziva and he knows that whatever they had, it was real, which is why he doesn’t doubt for a second that Tali is his. (I resent the fact that I have to write this sentence out because IT SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN THIS WAY SHOW but it is what it is) It’s been years, and if he’s moved on then maybe she has too, but he realizes how old she is and how the dates line up and he knows how Tali came to be. They may be fucked up, but they had something that summer and that fall and it was theirs alone.

There’s only a slight tinge of anger when he finds out; I’m sure there was a lot more of it later on, when the dust settled and the shock wore off. But his first reaction isn’t to lash out: his first reaction is to embrace Tali and devote himself to her wholeheartedly. (The first scene of them together after he introduction is the two of them playing like they’ve known each other her whole life. They could have played up the awkward new dad route until the photo scene, but instead kid-phobic Tony instantly bonded with Tali.) Even if Tali weren’t his, she was absolutely Ziva’s, and that alone would have been enough for him to love her and want to protect her. The fact that she was theirs, that made them two halves of a whole.

From that moment on, Tony no longer keeps his Ziva feelings inside anymore. To be fair, he’d actually been pretty open about them ever since he came back from Israel in season 11, from his discussion with Gibbs about feeling like he made the wrong choice coming back (only it wasn’t him who made the choice), to the one with Abby about missing Ziva but needing to move on, to every little moment in between where he refers to his healing and his terrible year without her and how he feels restless (the subtext meaning, without her). But whatever tenuous lock was on his Ziva-fault, her loss breaks it open, and every feeling bubbles to the surface. 

We see the unbearable grief at her death (or, “death” -- THANK YOU SEASON 16), absolutely played like that of a lover and not just a friend. (See the different reactions of McGee or Jimmy or Ducky or Abby, compared to Tony’s.) The shock and betrayal of finding out he’s a father and had no chance to be one, but still seeing the importance of stepping up and almost relief because at least he still has part of her to hold onto. The way he smells her scarf, an act of such intimacy you almost feel like a voyeur watching him breathe her in. The way he slowly comes to terms with it when he’s with McGee -- the reality setting in and the doubts creeping in about why Ziva kept Tali from him, how maybe she didn’t fully trust him, but that doesn’t matter, because he loved her. Goddamn, did he love her. McGee may be shocked about what Tony and Ziva were getting up to after hours, but one thing he does know is that they absolutely loved each other.

We see it in how tender he is with Tali; Tony is a good man and would do right by any orphaned child who needed protection in a scary time, but knowing Tali is his daughter and Ziva’s daughter makes her the most precious thing in the world to him from the get-go. From the moment he meets her, you can see that he vows to take care of her the way Ziva would have wanted. Because he loves her and while he just met Tali, he knows instantly that he loves her, too. And loving Tali is how her can honour his love of Ziva.

I absolutely hate the scene where they take down Trent Kort. I will always hate it. I may hate Trent Kort, but I hate unnecessary use of force even more, and always have, and this has always been a scene that horrifies me. That being said, the important part of it is when he declares that “[ZIva] was my family.” It’s important that he says it to Kort, because Kort has always needled both he and Ziva about their relationship since his first appearance, and he used that against Tony in the previous episode. He needed Kort to see just what he destroyed by (supposedly) killing her, that this was not at all a professional beef that was about to go down, but absolutely a personal one. 

And it’s finally an admission of what he and Ziva were to each other. They weren’t just colleagues, or partners, or even friends (although they were all of those things and they were all important). They were family; they became intertwined in a way that made them inextricable from each other. Season 10 showed us this in spades, and “PPF,” while a punch in the gut, was basically an hour-long tribute to it. (As much as I hate how Ziva left, the orchard scene and the tarmac scene are two of the most beautiful scenes of their relationship. They are acts of devotion.) They were everything to each other, and all Tali did was become a representation of it. Becoming parents didn’t make them a family, it only entrenched it. They were each other’s family long before that. By the time Abby implores him to understand, he’s realized that in his own way, he did know. It just got lost for awhile.

In a way, “Family First” is a bookend to “Past, Present and Future,” albeit not necessarily in the way want. In PPF, Tony was so desperate to commit to Ziva, to make a home with her and love her the way he knew was ready for, to make a life with her, but she wasn’t ready, and that was the tragedy of it all. In FF, he does finally get to make that commitment to her, by way of Tali. Like he tells Gibbs, he’s now everything to her, and by doing so he’s finally everything to Ziva, too. It’s all backwards, of course, but Tali is everything he wanted in that orchard: she is their family. All those moments where he doubted whether he made the right choice, whether he should go back and ask Ziva to give them another chance, if staying would have made them happier-- ultimately, Tali makes that choice for them, and he does go back to find their home. It’s not in the way he, or any of us, wanted, but she is his answer. And he knows how much Ziva loved Tali, and that must tell him that somewhere, she loved him, too. And while the weight of his grief must press on him like a boulder, another weight that had been on his shoulders since PPF lifts, because he knows, finally, that he is loved.

Of course, the infuriating thing is that it took MW’s exit for the show to finally acknowledge it. And it took them killing off Ziva for them to get ready to show it. I can’t help but think how much the show would have benefitted if they’d leaned into these feelings and developments years earlier, how much richer the story would have been, how many amazing performances we could have witnessed, when every dangerous situation would have even deeper layers by virtue of the added weight of Ziva and Tony’s love for each other. I’m not talking about them making out all the time (although I wouldn’t say no ngl), but every dangerous situation, every life-threatening mission, every near-miss or serious injury to unfold-- we could have gotten some grade-A performances from these actors. Imagine even a fraction of MW’s range in the “all hands on deck” scene in a situation where Ziva’s life is threatened? Imagine Ziva’s barely-contained rage if someone harmed Tony? Imagine episode codas where we get those quiet moments of love as an antidote to whatever horror happened in the case, how much the characters could expand from acknowledging the love and support they have, instead of dancing around the word?

So, in conclusion, it sucks that this is how we had to see it, but if they had to make MW’s final episode all about Ziva, I’m glad they at least acknowledged the elephant in the room, which was that Tony was hopelessly in love with Ziva and had been for ages, even when they were oceans apart. We saw the beginning of it in PPF where he begged her to come home, where she told him he was loved-- but finally we saw the words out of his mouth, not that we needed them. But what I’m saying is that the show finally let Tony say those words out loud, voice the emotions he was feeling and lay them out in the open for everyone to see. 

Luckily, now, we can watch the episode through a different lens. It still hurts, because this was not the way it should have been. There was no way Ziva should have been pregnant and alone and raised Tony’s child without him for nearly three years, and there was no way Tony should have been deprived of that and only found out after she died. But now we know that the show basically wrote its own fix-it fic on itself to try to salvage some of this story, and I’m grateful. None of this is the way we wanted it, but on the other hand, they could have let it be. They could have doubled-down on it and made her really, really dead and have Tony move on without her. Instead, it’s canon that they love each other and are finally together for their happy ever after, so I’ll take what I can get.

Because Tony really loves Ziva, and Ziva really loves Tony, and that is the thread that holds this whole thing together.

[galfridus1]

Data Privacy Day (late lol)

So yesterday (Jan 28) was data privacy day. Data security is something I’m really passionate about (I work with data for a large organisation and protecting it is one of my main responsibilities).

Here are some hints and tips for securing your personal data that I’ve learned along the way.

Sorry for the long post. The read more code isn’t working for me on my phone today.

1) Look at what the data will be used for.

This is a bit obvious but it does need saying. Don’t give away anything you don’t want to.

If you are in the European Union your data is protected by the General Data Protection Regulations or GDPR which came into force in May last year. Your data is permitted to be used and stored for several reasons but if there is no legal gateway for using/storing/sharing it (like for safeguarding reasons, to ensure contracts can be processed or for the public interest) then the organisation/person collecting it needs your informed, opt-in consent.

I.e. they want to send you marketing information? They need to say please tick if you would like to receive marketing information (the old please tick to opt out trick is no longer allowed). They are not allowed to say that you can only access some service or other if you tick yes. So if you wanted to go to a children’s centre with your kid for example they are not allowed to say you can’t go unless you sign up for marketing emails.

I know the GDPR has had really bad press on this site but it is a really important set of regulations that absolutely has the consumer in mind. It is complex and a lot of organisations are struggling with it because there’s not much case law yet but the intent is to protect users like us. And I believe after the dust has settled it will work. Google for example got slapped with a significant fine recently for misusing personal data. I would encourage you to find out more about the GDPR if you are in the EU.

2) Where is the data stored?

Companies often say “your data will be stored securely”. Well where, how? Where a server is based is entirely relevant: some are more safe than others. The European Union? Pretty safe as it goes. The US? Much more hackable honestly. There are some countries where the data are extremely vulnerable if the server is there.

Are your data going to be stored in an anonymised, encrypted format? There’s no point saying you will ensure anonymity in sharing/dissemination if the raw data links up information so that a hacker can see you name, address, income, what you ate for breakfast etc all in the same place is there? The better research organisations give people a unique id and store things like survey responses etc with that attached instead of names and addresses.

Who is going to access the data and for how long? Data should be deleted when it is no longer required. Companies should have a data retention policy. So HR records for example, a company needs to keep them while you are employed with them obviously, and for a period afterwards in case you take them to tribunal or require a reference. Do they need it 5 years after you have left? After 10? These are important questions to ask. If there are no answers the organisation or person you are dealing with has not given enough thought to protecting your data.

3) Do not underestimate how much data your smartphone network provider has about you.

I went to a presentation years back from a large mobile phone network provider in an EU country. They could tell you for a typical smartphone user: when they woke up, where they lived, what they did in the morning (do they check emails, play games, read the news, watch porn?), what mode of transport they took to work, where they worked, how long they worked, what they do at work, what time they go home and by what mode of transport, what they do at home, when they go to bed, where they spend the weekend and what they do.

If you don’t want your network provider to know where you are at any point in time turn off GPS. Check how the data are stored and what they are used for.

4) Be careful with research (interviews, surveys).

I say this as a researcher. My organisation does a lot of important research so we can make things easier for our clients, so we can ensure the products and support we provide are what is required, so we can make changes to the way we interact with our clients so that they have a better experience. This is all valid research. We protect our colleagues’ and clients’ data with diligence. We make mistakes of course but we do our utmost to minimise risks and we report things to the correct authority if there are problems. We are upfront with the people whose data we collect.

Things to look out for to show that the researchers/company/individuals have thought about research ethics and how to best protect your personal information:

- who is collecting the data (both the organisation carrying out the research and who funded it)

- who will access the data (number of people, teams, which organisations etc depending on the research)

- what the data will be used for/ the purpose of the research

- how will the data be stored and for how long

- how will results be disseminated

- you should be reminded that you have the right to withdraw permission for your data to be stored at any time

- if the organisation wants to link the data you provide with other sources they should get your explicit permission (this isn’t sinister - it can be used to minimise respondent burden by asking you fewer questions or to try and ensure data accuracy or to improve the types of research that can be done - they just need to be upfront about it).

I personally feel obligated to take part in any research where I am requested to participate as someone who asks people to share their data for a living but NOT if the above conditions have not been met. I do this for the people I request data from and I expect the same level of thought from those I share data with.

5) Social media research is becoming increasingly important - do not provide your location if you do not want your data used.

Posts and profile information on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc are all scraped up by social media analysis tools so that they can be analysed. Companies use this for things like sentiment analysis (what do people think of my organisation/product?) and more and more to address more complex research questions like where will the next outbreak of norovirus occur (that is genuine research, very clever, uses mentions of vomit and chundering etc to triangulate with heath provider data where the next wave of norovirus will occur).

If you don’t want your information used like this my number one tip is do not add in your location to your profile. People mostly want to know what country you are in for this sort of work.

When reporting social media analysis, there are ethical questions being asked in the research community about how far it is acceptable to include direct quotations in reports. Obviously if you have a public account and your post is quoted then someone can cut and paste it into a search engine and find you. Bear in mind one school of thought is, the user made it public, so it is fair and fine to quote it.

Honestly do not put anything on social media you would not be happy with your parents and employer seeing. Even if your account is private Some providers sell aggregated anonymous data for research purposes.

Please protect your data.

[lokilickedme]

Hello My Lady! Just because you asked, here are my faves of yours: #1 King (no surprise here), #2 Jack (too crazy not to love, and the stream crossing of pretty much all your stories is genius) #3 Chem/BD/TTW/TKH/TWK/can't remember them all. They're all special in their own way! Can't believe it'll be 3yrs soon since I started squatting your page!!! God time goes by fast! I'd like to add a special mention for the Muse Meetings, sooo funny, and a Golden Snowflake to Aleks. Cute little bumkin.

Thank you @fudgemuffinanon!  Dear god, has it been that long?  Seems like I joined up last year…*sits here blinking at my posts from 2015, wondering how that happened*

**LONG TEXT POST COMING UP**

You drew the lucky straw today my darling, I’m feeling wordy and in the mood to share.  A lot of people have asked me over the last couple of years how some of my stuff came about, and you mentioned one that gets a lot of asks.

Lemme tell you something about the Muse Meetings.  Way back in 1998 when I got my first computer, one of the very first things I ran across by way of internet fanfiction was a little something called The Very Secret Diaries penned by a writer named Cassandra Claire (who is now professionally published under the name Cassandra Clare).  The Very Secret Diaries (which are hilarious, btw) woke something up in me - mainly because, as a lifelong writer who had never allowed anyone to read 95% of my work, I finally realized that yeah, there were other people out there whose brains deviated from the standard in the same way mine did.  Her writing style back then (in the Diaries specifically, I’ve never actually read anything else she’s written) was very similar to the way I wrote, and those Diaries were exactly the sort of silly, ridiculous, irreverent thing I’d scribbled in my notebooks for most of my life.  And people liked it, she had a huge following based on just those out-of-context glimpses of her characters’ personal thoughts.  She was writing behind the scenes thoughts of characters, things that would never make it into books, and it was brilliant.  That was the kind of stuff I loved to write but had never given myself permission to show anyone.  She was showing hers to people, and they were loving it.

Which gave me the inspiration to not only put my work out there in the public eye for the first time ever, but to stick with my personal writing style (which I’d always assumed wasn’t what other people wanted to read, based on the books I’d been exposed to most of my life).  Not change anything.  Just do me.  And doing me meant writing silly nonsense if I wanted to.

So - The Very Secret Diaries are more or less the inspiration for the Muse Meetings, or at least the official written version of them.  I’d always imagined dialogues with my characters outside the confines of whatever story I was working on, but never thought anyone else would be interested in seeing me write it out.

The Diaries made me realize different.  Not only were her characters yammering and complaining and snarking at each other (both out of character and in), they were doing it in exactly the way I’d imagined my own characters interacting in the real world.  I loved it.  Seeing someone else do what I’d always done in my head - and do it in an official, out-there-in-the-public-eye capacity, was a revelation.  Finally I was able to give myself permission to write the way I wanted to, without restricting myself to the styles and methods in the books in the family library.  It had always been in my head, but now it didn’t have to stay there.  I could write proper stories, but I could also write what was going on in the other room, where the reader seldom gets to peek.  And other people besides myself might like it because hey, there’s precedent.

That was freeing, and I am grateful to Ms Claire for that.

So, a little history that leads up to how and why I finally started writing out the Muse Meetings:

My first fandoms that I wrote for online were Harry Potter and Star Wars (Kenobi specifically).  And yes, way back then (late 90′s - early 2000′s) there were already muse meetings among my characters.  I’ve been doing these for a long time, and I wish the out-of-character stuff I’d written back then still existed (my HP stuff bit the dust when The Restricted Section shut down, and my SW stuff was on FF.net for a little while but honestly I don’t remember my user ID there or the titles of the fics, though I have searched…so they’re most likely lost as well).  It’s sort of a shame because there were some old Anakin/Obi-Wan muse meetings that you guys would have loved…and the stuff between Remus and Sirius while we were hashing out what was going to be in their next chapter?  It still pains me that it’s all lost, but maybe it’s for the best.  That was nearly two decades ago, we move on to bigger and (hopefully) better things.

After my urge to write HP fic fizzled out I stopped writing for a while, but there were always muse meetings going on in my head for stories I scribbled mentally.  To me they’ve always been more fun than the actual stories, which explains my love for gag reels and behind-the-scenes featurettes for movies (I watch those first, always).

And then I found AO3 - funnily enough, I discovered it while searching the internet for one of my lost HP fics - and I decided to start writing in earnest again.  With all those thousands and thousands of fics and endless fandoms, it seemed like the perfect place to indulge my need to share what went on in my head.  And as I settled into the MCU and my stories started to grow to include multitudes of characters, those impromptu staff meetings with my muses kept being called to order.  Stuff that my characters would never say in the context of their stories got said.  Scenarios that were too ridiculous to waste time writing were played out.  Arguments and fights and bantering between characters who, in the restrictive confines of their own tales, would never in a million years interact…now they were throwing poptarts at each other (and occasionally knives) while the side characters wandered out of the room to watch TV or raid the fridge or sat in horror as someone’s until-now unassuming wife brandished a melon baller as a weapon.

It was messy and fun and was by far my favorite part of the writing process.

That’s what eventually became the Muse Meetings.  You want to know how they escaped my head and became an official thing?

Well I’m gonna tell ya lol

One of my very first friends in here, the fantastic @elvenfair1, was one of my first readers at AO3 and she told me I should post links to my fics at this site called tumblr to bring in a bigger audience.  So I opened an account here, followed her, posted some links as suggested, and she and I began messaging back and forth pretty much every night as we wrote our respective fics, bouncing ideas off each other and discussing plot points and brainstorming for character names.  And as my characters sassed me and refused to cooperate with what I wanted them to do, I would tell elvenfair what was going on in my head with my dumbass OCs and OFCs and we’d laugh and gripe about trying unsuccessfully to reel in our unruly muses.

And then one night back in 2015 she said “You should post this muse stuff, it’s hilarious.”

You know what the first thing I thought was?  Cassandra Claire did it 14 years ago and people loved it.  So yeah, I can sure as hell do it if I want.  If nobody is interested in it, at least it’ll amuse me and elvenfair and that’s cool enough.

And so I did.  I started posting them in here first, then as people started requesting them more I eventually moved them to AO3 in a more structured format.  And now you guys have multiple Lokis hurling curses at a bartender and viciously baiting a hapless movie star while teenage versions of two other attendees flirt with unsuspecting OFCs, with an occasional appearance by Thor dropping hints about future chapters and looking for fruit roll-ups.  It’s messy, but it’s fun and I’ve always enjoyed writing it as a way to let my brain decompress, especially when one of my “real” stories has hit a roadbump.

Since then I’ve seen countless other professional writers doing the exact same thing - J.R. Ward even posts her own version of muse meetings on her official website AND has a published book (her Insiders Guide) that is almost entirely nothing BUT muse meetings.   It’s surprising how many writers actually do this and I sometimes wonder if authors like Poe, Steinbeck, Vonnegut, Tolkien, Gaiman, McMurtry didn’t do it themselves (I’d bet money on McMurtry).  Just goes to show there’s not an original idea anywhere in the universe…no matter how much you might believe you came up with it first, someone out there has been doing it for a long damn time before you - and a million more will do it after you :)

Anyway, I haven’t written any muse meetings in a while but they still go on constantly in my head.  I get asked about once a week to go back to doing them, and one day I will, when I have time for it.  My actual fics are struggling for writing time as it is and I made a conscious decision to weed out the unnecessary stuff in favor of “real work” (yeah right lol)…but yeah, the Meetings are still one of my favorite things and I won’t stop doing them permanently - they’ll be back.

So thank you Cassandra Claire for inspiring me to let them fly…if it weren’t for those whacked-out Diaries, the Muse Meetings would all still be in my head with only one person (me) laughing at them.

[populistmedia]

Declining New York Times Says Baseball Is Too "White" In Fake News Report

Friday the New York Times decried the pigmentation of the game of Baseball as being too "white",  and to prove it dragged up 7 year old posts of a player commenting on people's pigmentation and smeared an entire national history of a sport which is known for making minorities superstars. "We live in an age of unbridled white id. Many days it is anything goes, baby, from the White House to the baseball stands; objecting often draws a scornful wave of the hand and a lecture on political correctness. The latest eruption comes courtesy of Josh Hader, a 24-year-old white relief pitcher with a smoking fastball and a Twitter account filled with hideous thoughts typed when he was 17 and 18. A Hader sampler: “White Power, lol” (with an emoji of a clenched fist), “KKK,” and “I hate gay people.” He also used that vilest of words for black people." With a Loud Ovation, Baseball Shows Its Whiteness Lest you not be told how being white is terrible someplace else today, the declining New York Times would like to use their platform to make sure you know while you are trying to enjoy America's favorite pastime, this summer, that being white is not ok. Beside that point, this seems to be fake new because it does not reflect the truth. STATISTICS According to the Society of American Baseball Research, "The past 20 years has witnessed a decline in African American players in the game. This has become common knowledge, though we do not believe that the data has been publicly presented back to 1947 in a place that is easy to find. The downward trend is present at all positions, although the overall decline has been exacerbated by the increased share of roster spots being allocated to pitchers and catchers. Also, looking at player value lessens some of the decline. During this same period, the share of both Asians and Latinos has increased markedly, keeping the major leagues as diverse as it has ever been," they said. Are Hispanics "white" now?  According to this ESPN article from 2011 there was a growing concern that African American and White Americans were being turned away from opportunities in the sport in favor of Hispanics. "As a big league general manager told me a few years ago, "A dad will spend 25 grand over the years on gear and travel ball without blinking an eye, just so he can sit at the bar in his country club after playing 18 and tell everyone his kid is on a baseball scholarship that might be worth five grand a year." And when those kids leave home or college and play for money, they find a vastly different landscape. Kids from the Dominican Republic and Venezuela -- to name two countries whose players are exempt from the amateur draft -- show up in droves with little cultural assimilation but a ton of baseball savvy. Major league teams have invested heavily in player development in the DR and other Latin countries, and you can watch that investment pay off in the postseason. It's no coincidence that organizations with some of the best Latin scouting and development systems (Rangers, Yankees, Diamondbacks) are still playing. Ramon Ramirez, left, and Shane Victorino, center, exchanged words after Ramirez hit Victorino with a pitch in August. AP Photo/Ben Margot This season, 27 percent of major league players and more than 42 percent (conservatively) of minor league players are Hispanic," said Tim Keown from ESPN. COINDINCE?  2011 is the same year that the New York Times bit the dust. https://twitter.com/mashable/status/33185176540422145 DeNile is not just a river in Egypt https://twitter.com/AntoineTinnion/status/1022748850870804480 What "The People" are saying: https://twitter.com/dmarie2018/status/1019326289554149376 Apparently, "independent journalism" from the New York Times doesn't mean statistics and facts. https://twitter.com/TVMohandasPai/status/948226313822748672 SEE https://twitter.com/mysuleiman/status/1022644571946344448 The writers at the New York Times must not read the New York Times https://twitter.com/alexander_vance/status/1021843556733014017 NYT WAR ON BASEBALL OR WAR ON WHITES OR WAR ON REPUBLICANS? Speaking of Baseball, https://twitter.com/painefultruths/status/1021480791065485312 Perhaps there is hope for the NYT to overcome these faliures. You decide:

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[thebiggaylion]

Eric Prydz @ EDC Orlando 2015

Hello again, everyone!  Orlando is still here!  I say that because of Hurricane Irma, having just came through between last week’s #ThrowbackThursday and today.  I haven’t been over by Tinker Field yet to make sure it’s still intact, but considering the baseball diamond was taken down, and all that’s over there is a few walking paths and maybe some light posts, I don’t anticipate any “real” damage.  Whatever it may have, I’m sure things will be ready for November!  Speaking of storm-related incidents, you may notice this is being posted on Friday, not Thursday... well, that’s because the guy who’s behind The Big Gay Lion lost power yesterday during a storm.  Not really related to Irma, but I’m sure the power lines and such around where he lives must be a bit strained heh.  Power outages aren’t really interesting, BUT I wasn’t smart about saving this post frequently like I normally am... and I lost it all haha, so I had to start over today!  Maybe I should call this one #FlashbackFriday?  Also, this one's got a lot of videos, so it's gonna have to be a two-part post!  Catch part one and part two if you need to give your hardware a break.

I’ve been looking forward to attending an Eric Prydz show for a while, but I’ll be honest:  I didn’t anticipate it being in a festival setting.  I like getting a little (read:  A LOT) turnt at EDC Orlando, and his flavor of house didn’t strike me as “perfect” for this venue, let alone Kinetic Field (even though, yes, he is house, and that’s where house lives at EDC).  However, I wasn’t disappointed by any means!  The only part of the performance that was disappointing was this thoroughly obnoxious person who pushed up next to me and kept swaying back and forth, bumping into me repeatedly and being otherwise distracting.  Sure, PLUR and all, and I get that... but don’t be a nuisance, man!  Anyway, if you see my camera jerk, it’s because dude (on my right) hit my arm--again.  If you hear any vocalizations that clearly aren’t coming from the speakers, that’s also probably him, too haha.

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram What a great song to dust off and play a mix/cover of!  There was lots of underwater-esque visuals during his set, for the Empire of the Sea interstitial had just played before his set.  Those bubble chains and tentacles are something that stuck with me whenever I reminisce about this performance. Matt Samuels feat. For The Masses - Enjoy The Silence https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKr4zf9Z92I

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram These visuals stick out a lot for me, too.  Insomniac knows how to theme their CGI, for sure.  In what was one of the only easily recognizable drops in the whole performance, the techs were ready to accent it properly! Popof - Serenity (Noob Remix) https://soundcloud.com/form-music/popof-serenity-noob-remix-6-years-of-form-music-2009-2015

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram I managed to catch a lot of special effects in these videos, it seems!  I also noticed that all of these videos make it seem I’m much closer than I actually am heh.  I’m probably 50 feet or so from the front rails, FYI.  Also, apparently this track is unreleased, so forgive the “who is that guy?” link below haha Cirez D - Metropolitan (ID) https://soundcloud.com/gustav-granath/cirez-d-metropolitan-id

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram R.I.P. Vine.  Man, I do love me some lasers, don’t I?  A flood of classic green lasers like these above will surely hold my attention during any performance. Dusty Kid - Tsunamy https://soundcloud.com/juju-hardstyle/dusty-kid-tsunamy

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram I do like it when an artist brings their own visuals, but sometimes if Insomniac is given free reign on what to display, it comes together much more cohesively, don’t ya think?  Empire of the Sea indeed! Dusty Kid - Tsunamy https://soundcloud.com/juju-hardstyle/dusty-kid-tsunamy

Download High Res (37.2 MB) | Download Low Res (5.5 MB) You know, you don’t see enough dancing performers at EDC Orlando, I think.  Usually whenever you see them, there’s a handful of them strewn across the stages, but it always feels pretty sparse.  Maybe it’s my old expectations from the Electric Daisy Carnival Experience documentary from almost 10 years ago (heavy rounding, obviously!), but I think we could do with another 2-4 dancers per appearance.  What do you think?

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram Here’s a good example of Mr. Obnoxious that was standing next to me lol.  I wish I had a clip of this song that didn’t include his flourishes, but alas! Eric Prydz - Power Drive https://soundcloud.com/eric-prydz/pryda-power-drive-released-01

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram Mr. Obnoxious had been attempting to yell up to Eric Prydz the name of this song title for most of the performance.  I suppose he thought that dude was up there TAKING REQUESTS, or that there was some universe in which he wouldn’t play one of his biggest tracks at the moment in his festival set.  PLUR, I know, I know, PLUR.  One can be annoyed and still be PLUR, as long as they don’t perpetuate it, right?  At least this clip didn’t include any karaoke haha Eric Prydz - Generate https://soundcloud.com/eric-prydz/eric-prydz-generate-out-13th-april

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram And here’s his other hot-at-the-moment track!  This was pre-release, but obviously SiriusXM (and the internet at-large) was all over this track before it (and later, the album of the same name) came out in early 2016. Eric Prydz - Opus https://soundcloud.com/eric-prydz/eric-prydz-opus

Download High Res (46.2 MB) | Download Low Res (6.7 MB) It’s awesome how a simple projection can make the Crystal Village’s Night Owl go from crystalline to more of a topiary!  This was right at the finale of the set, and what a great set it was!

I figured this set was about as close to a neonGARDEN performance as I would get (which obviously turned out to be false).  Yes, I know that venue doesn’t typically feature house music (with notable exceptions), but still!  Also, don’t forget, this post will be broken up into a two-parter, due to the number of videos!  Check out part one here and part two over here!  Love ya’ll, see ya next time! 🏳️‍🌈🦁❤

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